#i dont know how they consistently manage to get stuck in my head there’s really no reason for it anymore

[quinn-pop]

you guys should grow old together or something

they’re so :| and :3 to me

[bratkook]

rough hands. (m) jjk

pairing : tattooed!jungkook x tattooed!reader (slight fuckboy!jk)

word count : 12k, (i hate myself why cant i ever write anything shorter than 10k goodbye)

genre : (fr)enemies to lovers, smut, this is for @mygukandonly​ ty for the idea and for sharing my thirst for jungkook lmao also ps. if you read this/enjoy it pls reblog bc tumblrs tags are dead af tysm

warnings : overstimulation, dirty talk (its kinda sweet tho?), playful banter during sex, unprotected sex

summary : how is he meant to confess that he’d tear off his left arm for you if you asked when he can see the way you look at him in disgust when his nervous rambling leads to retelling the raunchy stories of girl’s past

The muffled sound of your roommate and his best friend laughing in the kitchen can be heard through your bedroom wall, a smile spreading across your face when you hear Hoseok’s telltale joyous laugh, no doubt in the middle of telling a story. 

You rake your fingers through your hair once more, fluffing it up and stepping back from the mirror to give yourself a once over, your hands tugging down on the tight dress you had on. The black shiny latex hugging your curves in all the right spots and you smirk as excitement fills you when you think of the dumb shit you and your best friend Rina were going to get into tonight.

In the kitchen Hoseok pours another shot for himself and Jungkook, the two of them energized at going out tonight as well, the video game demo they had been working on at work had gotten approved, being given the green light to move further into it so they would be celebrating tonight. The rest of his friends were set to arrive at your shared apartment for some pregame drinks before they left to their designated bar of choice.

“Y/N! Take a shot.” Hoseok shouts out when you step out of the hallway, his head peeking out by the breakfast bar to see you. He’s wearing a simple white tshirt, his colorful tattooed arms on full display as he holds out a shot glass for you to take. As you step closer to grasp it Jungkook’s eyes bulge out at what you’re wearing, he chooses to throw back his shot, letting the burn of tequila take his mind off how hot you looked. Jungkook has had it bad for you for so long, you and Jungkook have ran in the same circle since high school, not exactly friends but there was always a mutual friend linking you two together.

Jeon Jungkook has always been shameless, even at the young age of 16, when his hair was all bangs and the only thing on his mind was bands, shows, and girls. His debauchery only worsened in college when his muscles bulked up and he started experimenting with tattoos, there is nothing horny college girls love more than a man with long black hair and inked sleeves so of course he embraced it. 

The social circle you two shared slowly dwindled away after the first year of college as people dropped out, moved out of state or started a career while you finished your schooling. Because of that, you hadn’t really seen or heard much about Jungkook during your last year of college, not sure if he ever finished, dropped out or took a year off. It wasn’t until fate had you responding to a room mate needed ad that lead you to Jung Hoseok and in turn leading you right back to Jeon Jungkook, full circle.

And in that reunion it was made clear that he had stayed exactly the same, the same 16 year old mentality trapped inside a bulked out tattooed man, his new found goal being getting under your skin because he loved seeing you upset.

Your eyes meet Jungkook’s as you grab the shot glass, standing right beside Hoseok as he pours himself yet another shot. He just smirks at you, noticing your added height with the platform shoes you have on, “If you wear those shoes you can get on all the rides at Disney.”

He hides his smile behind the glass, seeing you roll your eyes as you throw back the shot, glaring at him once you swallow it, “Oh shut up, I’m normal sized, it’s not my fault you’re a fucking Titan.”

Hoseok laughs loudly at your comeback, his shoulders nudging Jungkook and seeing him fighting back a smile at your reaction, “Touché.”

The contents of the tequila bottle start to dry out so Hoseok pushes it away, opting for grabbing a cup to start making drinks to pace himself until his friends show up. You have the beginnings of a buzz warming you up, sliding out your phone to see that Rina texted you to come over, wanting to pregame as well before you went out together.

As you start texting her back your ears tune in to the story Jungkook had decided to start telling, reminiscing on the last time they had all gone out to that dive bar. His hands are animated as he tells Hoseok about the drunk girl he had his eyes on, the both of them ending up in the gross bathroom while she gave him a sloppy blowjob, stopping halfway through to puke all over the floor and how it had absolutely wounded his ego. Him and Hoseok are bent over in hysterics as you lock your phone and roll your eyes, like clockwork Jungkook had to start talking about his sexual escapades, “And that’s my cue to fuck off.”

You shove your phone into your tiny side bag as you start to walk away and Jungkook presses his lips together as he realizes once again he said something he shouldn’t have. Hoseok turns to look at you, “You sure you don’t wanna come out with us? It’ll be more fun than that fetish club you’re into.”

You laugh at him, acting as if he didn’t frequent that club as well, “Is Iseul joining you?”

He frowns at the mention of his girlfriend, getting a little sad that she would in fact not be joining him, “No, she’s got an early shift tomorrow so she cant.”

“Sorry but if she’s not there I’m not interested.” You tease with a shrug, throwing your arm up in a wave before leaving your apartment, the door slamming behind you.

Jungkook instantly sulks once you’re gone, mentally slapping himself for always managing to say stupid shit around you. He couldn’t help himself, the small crush he had spawned in high school when you were still the timid girl that wore band tees two sizes too big, and now that you had matured into this, all leather and stockings and tattoos that rivaled his, that crush had bloomed and with it came plenty of wet dreams and fantasies. 

He knew he stuck his foot in his mouth every time you two ended up in the same vicinity but his usual confident and cocky self became a nervous fucking wreck around you. His brain chose to either rile you up with mean jokes or let his mouth run on autopilot. Unfortunately the only two topics programmed in consisted of shit regarding his job as an audio engineer for video games or his raunchy one night stands. More often than not it was the latter, talking about vulgar things made you walk away, if he talked about technical shit that you didn’t know about, it left room for questions from you and more of a chance for him to embarrass himself.

He uncaps the tequila bottle again and tips it back, taking a swig from the bottle and accepting that he’d have to live with annoying you from afar.

Its not until you come home that night, absolutely hammered, while hes there that he gets the first glimpse that maybe his dreams aren’t so far fetched. He’s stood in the doorway between the kitchen and living room, the buzz of the night having left him a while ago, a bowl of cheerios in his hand that he’s currently shoveling into his mouth when you stumble in, tripping over the doors threshold as you giggle and attempt to shut it quietly as to not wake up Hoseok.

Jungkook smirks with a mouthful of cereal as you press your forehead against the door and double over in hushed laughter, no doubt remembering something stupid that happened earlier. “You okay?” He finally speaks up, scaring you, you whip around in shock and slam your back against the door, a small whimper of pain leaving you as you slide down until your butt meets the floor.

“Oh shit.” He sets his bowl down and goes over to make sure you’re okay, your body is slumped on the floor with your legs sprawled out and he forces himself to just stare at your face, a small frown on it now that you realize how drunk you are. But thanks to that, the usual dont touch me attitude you normally have is missing, letting Jungkook scoop you up by the arms. He swallows as his fingers go down to tug the hem of your dress since it had rode up from you sliding down, his fingers lingering slightly on your thigh.

Your head lolls over now that he’s holding you up and away from the wall, a small smile on your face as you stare at him, your finger coming up to gently prod at the bar he has in the center of his lip, seeing them curl up as well because fuck are you drunk.

Your eyes are having trouble focusing on him with the dim light and the two shots you took just as you left the bar finally settling into your system but you make him out just fine, the weird orange glow coming from the kitchen illuminating him enough for you to see him. “You’re really cute in this lighting.” You slur out.

Jungkook just blushes, not knowing how to respond to you because you complimenting him was not the norm. When your brain decides that your head is far too heavy to hold up it drops back, showing him the expanse of your neck and the beautiful peony you have at the side of it, just under your ear, leading up to the spot where your neck meets your collarbone and Jungkook can’t stop himself from thinking of sucking hickeys into the skin there, the purple splotches coloring the blackwork tattoo.

“Wow, you’re sloshed.” He hauls you up, the muscles on his body clearly not being for show as he carries you to your room. He flicks the light on and gently places you on your mattress, hearing you groan in protest but otherwise not moving. His hands start to unbuckle the straps to your shoes, cute leopard print platform heels with the words doll face adorning the toe strap and it was very much you.

They land on your hardwood floor with a loud thud but you don’t register it, your eyes staying shut as you shove your face into your sheets. He opts for leaving you in your dress, shoes were fine but clothing was uncharted territory so he just unfolds the fluffy throw blanket at the edge of your bed and drapes it over you. His hands turn you over until you’re on your side, a stack of pillows at your back so he knows you won’t run the risk of choking on your puke if the situation arises. When he knows you’re no longer at risk of dying he starts to get up, your hands coming to grasp his and it startles him to see your drunk eyes blinking at him softly.

Your lips are moving but he can’t make out what you’re saying so he inches closer, “Huh?”

When hes about a foot away your hands cup his cheeks and bring him in for a quick kiss, the scent of vodka filling his nose as he feels the softness of your lips, “Thank you Jungkookie.” The phrase slurs together in an almost incomprehensible sentence but he hears it as he pulls back, your eyes shutting and your hands dropping and laying limp beside you as you knock out.

Jungkook just stands at the edge of your bed, watching you sleep for a moment before he scurries out to the living room, forgetting about his cereal and collapsing onto the couch to crash, his hands rubbing his eyes almost as if he’s trying to wake himself up from the dream he swears hes in.

His night had been restless, he couldn’t even blame it on sleeping on a couch, he usually did that when he and Hoseok went out and he had to carry his best friend home. No his dreams had consisted of you and that damned latex dress, the small innocent kiss you gave him spurring him on, so he was thankful when he woke up and no longer had to be scared of you walking in on him saying some shit in his sleep.

Hes currently sprawled out on the couch, shirtless with his grey sweats on, one hand tucked behind his head as the other fiddled with his phone, scrolling through instagram and shamelessly rewatching your story for the millionth time. He just couldn’t stop replaying a video of you speaking into the camera, very drunk with a massive smile as you tried to get your friend who was in the background to face the camera, erupting into a laugh that made him smile along.

His finger presses down on his screen, pausing the video as his ears pick up the sound of a bedroom door opening, either Hoseok was up or you were. He wasn’t sure who he was hoping for but when he sees his friend walk out of his room with bedhead he wishes it was you.

Hoseok smacks his lips together a few times, his squinty eyes looking at Jungkook as he smiles, “How’d those jäger shots treat you?”

Jungkook laughs as he recalls Hoseok egging everyone on to take more of them, sitting up and ruffling his wavy hair, “I can still bounce back as quick as I did when I was 16.”

Hoseok just groans, his palm rubbing his forehead, “Wait until you hit 26.” He waddled into the kitchen and begins rummaging around, the sound of pills shaking in a container being a telltale sign that Hoseok desperately needed advil.

“Hungry?” He calls out and Jungkook hums in response, he was very hungry, he hadn’t wanted to get up and make himself food since last time he did he had mistakenly used up the last of your oat milk and you had been furious, tossing the empty carton at his head when you had tried to make yourself a bowl of cereal. “You cool with pancakes?”

“Dude you could give me a still frozen eggo waffle and I’d be grateful.”

Hoseok laughs loudly at his statement, pots and pans clanking together as he sets up and Jungkook winces, your bedroom shared a wall with the kitchen so it was only a matter of time until the noise woke you up.

It takes roughly 15 minutes of Hoseok chatting and the noise of the mixer to stir you from your sleep. Your mouth is dry and your eyes are pulsing from your headache when you fully awake, pushing yourself up from your bed you’re confused as to how you even got into it. The black dress you wore dug into your skin, the straps leaving deep imprints in your shoulders from the way you slept.

“What the hell.” You moan out, rolling your neck and staring down at the mountain of pillows that were laid out in a specific shape. Had Hoseok hauled your ass to bed last night?

The muffled sounds of chatter start back up, the smell of pancakes slipping under the crack in your door and you grin, hoping Hoseok had added chocolate chips into the mix.

Pancakes were a necessity right now, your stomach felt hollow and from past experiences if you waited too long to eat after drinking all night your hangover would last way longer, so you stand up, your sore feet aching as you shuffle to your drawers and pull out comfortable clothes.

When your door creaks open Jungkook stops talking, his fork staying impaled in the pancakes as the sound of your feet padding on the hardwood floor gets closer. Hes sat on the tall barstool facing the breakfast bar, Hoseok stood on the other side of it, both of them in the middle of eating when you finally show yourself.

Your eyes zero in on Jungkook and you frown, hes sitting shirtless, half of his back and side facing you, letting you see the swirls of black ink that cover the majority of his body. Your eyes follow the dragon that starts on his shoulder, tracing the head all the way down as its body curves and twists until the tail peaks away under the hem of his sweats, but you can’t drool over him, no matter how delicious he looked so you opt for being a brat.

“Don’t you have a home?”

Hoseok chokes on his laughter, seeing Jungkooks cheeks redden as he stares back at his plate. Did you not remember planting one on him last night? You were very drunk but c’mon, could the universe throw him a bone for once.

“Here, your stacks are over there, chocolate chips and all.” Hoseok flicks behind him, your gaze following and seeing the plate of pancakes with your name written all over it. The smile you have contrasts deeply with the look you had just given Jungkook, you were a sucker for chocolate chip pancakes.

You walk into the kitchen space and fix yourself up a plate, scooping out some of the leftover eggs in the pan and choosing to stand next to Hobi instead of sitting beside Jungkook. You’re both crammed on the small counter space beside the sink, the two of you had never gotten around to buying a dining table and always suffered the consequences so you always managed. 

You lift up the plate to your nose and inhale, sighing in appreciation, “Hoseok, Iseul is one lucky lady. Why hasn’t she put a ring on it yet?” You tease, setting the plate down and grabbing the syrup bottle to drown your pancakes in the sticky goodness.

Jungkook is blatantly staring at your plate in disgust, his eyes looking between his plate and your own, your pancakes covered in the thick syrup, the excess dripping off and pooling into your eggs.

“Jesus what.” You snap, setting the bottle down rather aggressively, sending him daggers as his face scrunches up at your food.

“Thats fucking disgusting.”

“You like your pancakes bone dry, I don’t fucking judge you so don’t judge me. We’ll see who’s laughing when you’re choking on your dry ass food.”

Hoseok just stands there as he eats his eggs, a stupid smirk on his face as you banter like children. It’s always entertaining for him, he wishes he could record every interaction because you and Jungkook were the same person, the same sick sense of humor and quick drags made for some interesting comebacks.

He can see Jungkook getting increasingly flustered as you both continue shooting insults at each other about breakfast food, the dreaded oat milk fiasco being brought up and when you point your fork at Jungkook threateningly thats when Hoseok steps in as referee. “Alright, alright children enough!”

He raises his arms up, silencing you both and forcing you to drop your makeshift weapon, “Jungkook, you know the oat milk scandal is a sensitive subject so minus 10 points for bringing it up.” Jungkook glares when you poke your tongue out at him, “And Y/N, Jungkooks right, you drowning your shit in syrup is disgusting so minus 15 points for that.” And now Jungkook is grinning at you mockingly, enjoying the shock on your face as you look at Hoseok, calling him a traitor and picking up your plate to go eat in your room since no one fucking appreciates me in this stupid house!

When your door slams shut Jungkook chuckles, his tongue prodding at his cheek as he shakes his head and resumes eating his breakfast. Hoseok holds his coffee cup next to his lip as he stares at his friend, “You two fight like a married couple.”

Jungkook’s reaction is immediate, scoffing and rolling his eyes, “She’s just annoying.”

Hoseok hums, nodding along like he believes Jungkook, “Ah, so are we both still pretending you don’t have it bad for her?”

That gets a real reaction from the younger boy, his eyes darting to the wall that you share with the kitchen before glaring back at his friend, “Dude!” He whines, his shoulders sagging, “Do you want her to hear you?” Hoseok just cackles, grabbing his dishes and placing them in the sink to start washing them. Jungkook just continues grumbling to himself, his fork clanking against the plate as he stabs his pancakes aggressively.

“Give yourself some credit Kook, she doesn’t hate you like you think she does.” Jungkook found that hard to believe, your morning greeting of accusing him of being homeless due to him always being at your place showed him how you really felt, but last night was the first time he had felt like maybe deep down you thought he was cute enough to kiss.

“Last night,” he starts off, setting his fork down, “she came home at like 4am totally wasted, I don’t even know how she managed to climb the stairs up to the front door. I carried her to bed and she uh, she kissed me.” He whispers the last part, his eyes glancing at the shared wall again, praying you were listening to music and not hearing this conversation.

Hoseok shuts off the faucet, whipping around with wide eyes, “Huh? Like coherently kissed you with tongue down your throat or like drunk peck kissed you?”

“The second one.”

The expression on Hoseoks face doesn’t comfort Jungkook, he’s pouting in sympathy, “I mean, she kisses Iseul with tongue and everything-”

“Okay but-wait what?” Jungkook stops himself from interrupting further, his interested piqued in hearing about you and Hoseok’s girlfriend making out. It was a regular occurrence, if you both got drunk enough the compliments began and before Hoseok knew it you and his girlfriend were swapping spit and then acting like nothing happened as you entered the dance floor.

His friend rolls his eyes at the look Jungkook throws at him, “Yeah, I think Iseul loves her more than me.”

“Okay well tell her to get in fucking line.” Jungkook jokes, “But no, she kissed me last night and considering she doesn’t like me within her bubble it has to mean something right?”

Hoseok pats his hands dry as he approaches the breakfast bar again, Jungkook looks unsure, his teeth nibbling on his lip piercing as he stares at him. The conversation had switched over drastically from Jungkook pretending he wouldn’t lay his body across a puddle of water for you to cross, now he looked like a nervous teenager that didn’t want to get rejected by his crush.

“I don’t know dude, you’re gonna have to say something to find out.”

Hoseok knew more than he would ever tell Jungkook, you had openly confessed to wanting to climb him like a tree only if he wore a muzzle a few months back so Hoseok knew Jungkook had a chance at least. The only issue was he wasn’t sure just sleeping with you would be enough for his friend, the crush he had been harboring was too strong for a one night stand and he wasn’t convinced you’d want the same so Hoseok kept his mouth shut, letting you two figure it out.

He tried his best to make it so you two would be around each other, always inviting Jungkook over or inviting you out with them but Jungkook never did himself any favors, he needed you guys to hang out in a different environment that didn’t require loud music and other girls so when his girlfriend suggests taking a weekend trip to her family’s lake cabin he doesn’t think twice before inviting you to join.

The weather lately had been miserable, the highs skyrocketing into the 100s so you didn’t hesitate to say yes, on the condition that you could bring your best friend with you just in case the rest of Hoseoks friends were just as immature as Jungkook was.

When the day comes you and your friend have to leave a few hours after the rest of the group does, having to wait for Rina to get off her short morning shift before you embark on the 2 hour drive. So walking into the cabin you’re met with some unfamiliar faces staring back at you from their place on the couch. You give a wave, spotting Iseul on a lounger, she smiles widely and hops up, bounding over to you and wrapping you in a hug.

“Yay, you made it!” She pulls back and greets Rina, standing beside you both and gesturing to the full room. “Guys this is Y/N and Rina.” They all wave back as she starts to introduce them in order, Jimin had red hair and a nose ring, Yoongi had grey hair and a rose tattoo on his hand, The last one to be introduced is Taehyung, brown hair and a wide smile, giving you and your friend a wave. Jungkook and Hoseok give you a wave as well, no introductions needed for them.

Due to your late arrival all the rooms have already been decided on, Jimin and Yoongi lucking out with securing the master suite but you and Rina had no complaints, grateful to have even been invited.

Now that introductions were out of the way and everyone was here Hoseok announces that hes gonna start up the grill outside to make some food. Everyone gets up to start assisting but you and Rina head back out to haul your bags in along with the alcohol and groceries you bought.

The weather is humid and gross, your skin tacky with sweat so you’re wearing the least amount of clothing you can. Already in a stringy gray bikini, a loose cut up tank top and the shortest shorts Jungkook has ever seen on you. Your tattoos on full display, the florals that cover your entire left arm, reaching your shoulder, he follows them up and over his eyes glued to the bold lines on your back that peek out when your shirt moves.

When you bend over to set down the box of drinks he stares at your ass, trailing down the soft skin of your thighs that were bare compared to the rest of your body. Tae elbows him harshly, “So thats Y/N I’m assuming?”

Jungkook grunts in response, swallowing when he sees you pull your hair up, exposing your neck and that tattoo he desperately wants to mark up, “You ever gonna make a move?”

“I don’t have the balls.”

Tae hums, “Great, well I do so see ya.” He slaps his arm and Jungkook thinks hes joking until Taehyung actually makes his way over to you, offering to help carry your bag to your room upstairs. The grateful smile you give him makes Jungkooks face twitch, you only ever smiled at him like that when you were wasted

Taehyung wasn’t actually going to hit on you, he wasn’t a cruel friend. He was just going to flirt harmlessly, give Jungkook a reason to fucking make a move. Rina is all giggles as she watches you follow Tae up the stairs, pointing towards the room you had been assigned.

As he walks in front of you, making friendly conversation you take the time to stare at him. It seems all of Jung Hoseoks friends were fucking god sent, Tae’s fluffy brown hair and kind eyes were easy to warm up to, his style more toned down than Jungkooks, only a few minimal tattoos scattered on his arms.

He sets your bag down on the bed and turns to you with his hands on his hips, “Thank you.” You mutter out, walking over to the window and shutting the blinds slightly to stop the sun from beating into the room and warming it up further.

“Yeah no problem, have you ever been here before?” He asks, making himself comfy on your bed.

“No, never. Super glad to finally have a friend who can say they have a lake house though.”

He agrees whole heartedly, the both of you making your way back out of the room and into the dining room to try to see what you could help out with.

It only takes less than a hour for everyone to gather around the table, munching on their hamburgers and hotdogs as you listen to Hoseok, Yoongi and Iseul talking about the summers they used to spend here during high school, all of them having grown up together.

“You two went to high school together also right?” Iseul speaks up when the laughter dies down, her fingers pointing between you and Jungkook. She smirks to herself when she sees the look on Jungkook’s face, swatting Hoseoks hand away from her side as he tries to pinch her for putting the two of you on the spot, he knows what shes up to.

“Oh, yeah we did.” You sigh, shaking your head as you think back to high school and all the cringeworthy things that happened. “Had a lot of mutual friends but uh, we didn’t have lake house summer hangouts like you guys did. The closest we got was backyard house shows during the summer that reeked of B.O.”

Jungkook lets out a laugh, nodding along as he remembers the shows your group would end up at. The group you had was a pretty huge on, all of the kids in your grade that liked the same music tended to bunch together and do things as a herd so even though you technically went to shows together it wasn’t one on one.

“Wait, do you remember that show the summer after high school where I dove off the stage–“

“Your dumbass always did that.”

He waves you off, determined to tell the story he sort of remembered, “I know, but this time all I remember was jumping off and then waking up with everyone huddled around me trying to call an ambulance.”

Your eyes widen as you recall the exact day he was talking about, it was a typical backyard show with too many underaged kids getting drunk off beer. Everything was set up like it normally was, a makeshift stage and amps against the brick wall with a small crowd huddled around it. The only difference was this house had a pool, an empty one, and although everyone had been cautioned to stay away, once people got hammered nothing mattered.

The crowd surrounding the stage was teetering close to the edge of the pool so you and your friend at the time chose to watch from the sidelines, and thats when a very drunk 17 year old Jungkook hopped onto the stage, wobbling onto the top of the drum kit and catapulting himself into the crowd. They had managed to catch him and started crowd surfing him back, right into the empty pool. Jungkook had been tossed into the deep end, head first and you had seen it all happen.

“There was so much fucking blood.” You shiver as you recall the group of you running into the pool to make sure he was alive. He had managed to bust his head open and as you saw him with blood dripping down his head you realized then that you really didn’t dislike him as much as you claimed you did because you really didn’t want him to die.

Jungkook throws his head back and laughs loudly, morbidly recalling how his friends had told him to go to the hospital in fear that he had a concussion or needed stitches and even though he said he was fine he was lowkey scared to sleep that night and not wake up the morning after.

Everyone laughs along, enjoying the way Jungkook turns a traumatic story into casual conversation. When Jimin asks what he did after he gained consciousness Jungkook just smirks as he drinks the last of his beer before shrugging, “I drank some more and got back into the crowd.”

You just cover your face in second hand embarrassment at the memory, a few laughs slipping out because yeah it had been slightly traumatic but also kinda funny.

“Have you changed much since high school?” You lift your head and see Taehyung had addressed his question to you and Jungkook chuckles under his breath, remembering your quiet demeanor.

It wasn’t until college that you came out of your shell, gaining confidence and experimenting with your fashion and hair colors, the tattoos covering your body increasing quickly. But Jungkook could say your personality has stayed the same, sure you were no longer timid, quick to bite back now but the personality he had found himself latching onto had stayed the same. Even when you two distanced yourselves he always thought of you, he liked to think it was fate that had you and him both knowing Hoseok.

“Definitely, for the better though.” Jungkook eyes his friend like a hawk, the small smirk on his face as he stares at you from across the table, making eye contact for a second before looking back at you. Jungkook sees the way you lean on the table, your cheeks tinting when you see the way he stares at you.

“I’d love to see photos, ya know, to compare.” The laugh you let out has Jungkook sulking. Taehyung was charming, all the girls flocking to him and usually Jungkook was the same but he turned into a jackass around you.

Hoseok sees his sulking friend and claps his hands to get everyones attention, “Alright I’m sure we’re all still sober enough to not fucking drown, lets go swim. I’m melting.”

Rina heads to the room to change since she was still in her work uniform so you wait for her on the back deck, resting on the porch rail and watching as they haul over fold out chairs and floaties to the water.

If you thought Hoseoks friends were hot fully clothed seeing them all taking their shirts off left you speechless, you stand with a wine cooler in your hand as one by one they start undressing. The only ones missing were Tae and Jungkook, both of them having been put on clean up duty.

“I wish this was a brazzers video and I was getting railed by all of them.” Your friend sighs as she pops up beside you and you just nod along, the two of you wiggling your eyebrows at each other.

“You coming?” Taehyung speaks up behind you, smiling to himself from having heard your friends statement and you two jump, your friend scattering away and saving herself from further embarrassment, she had her eyes set on Yoongi so thats who she was currently warming up to.

“Yeah,” you breathe out, taking in his shirtless body, his toned chest out in the sun like the golden god he was and then out comes Jungkook, his long black hair pushed off his face, fully shirtless in black swim trunks. As he stands next to Taehyung your mouth waters at the sight of both of them, Taehyung’s shoulders were wider than Jungkooks but the black and grey art work spanned across both of his arms and chest, leading to his back is definitely your type.

He catches you staring and smiles to himself, making a show of stretching his arm out to wrap around Taehyungs shoulders, shaking up his body, “Race you in?”

When he looks at you too you gulp down the last bit of your drink, setting down the bottle and slipping out of your clothes, not giving them a second glance as you scream out “Go!” and take off.

The dirt you run on slightly burns your feet and when you hear Jungkook and Taehyung catching up you scream, urging your legs to pick up the pace.

“Loser has to skinny dip!” Taehyung adds on to the rules, enjoying the annoyed look Jungkook sends his way, he knew what Taehyung was doing so he lurches forward until he’s right behind you.

You scream again when large tattooed arms wrap around you and haul you up and over their shoulder in a flash. You register that it’s Jungkook when you peak up and see Taehyung struggling to keep up, how Jungkook was able to carry you while also beating him had him baffled.

Jungkook would be damned if you had to strip in front of his friend so he feels no remorse, a smile stretching across his face when he hears you laughing, his hands are wrapped around your thighs just below your butt and he’s tempted to smack it but the cold water of the lake splashing onto his legs snaps him out of it.

“Fuck!” You screech as Jungkook enters the lake, the freezing water shocking you and he laughs again, sliding you off his shoulder to stand up on the lake bed.

“I didn’t expect it to be that cold.” He shivers next to you, dunking his head into the water before popping back up, his labret piercing glimmering in the sun.

Taehyung makes a show of splashing his way in, the water spraying everywhere and it has you shielding your face with a laugh, “Fucking cheater, is this your plan to see me naked Jungkookie?”

Jungkook smacks the water, the droplets spraying across Taehyungs face but he embraces it, laying back to float on the water with a smile, “No one said anything about getting naked until you spoke up, just say you wanna show off your monster cock and go.” He jokes, hearing Taehyung explode into laughter, choking slightly on the water as his head slips under from laughing.

You roll your eyes at the topic of dicks, “I don’t have a monster cock, unless you’re into that.” Taehyung teases you, trying to get further under Jungkook’s skin

“I could be.” You play along, it was now Jungkooks turn to roll his eyes, sinking further into the water until only his eyes were visible, could he drown himself here? He’s pretty sure you wouldn’t even notice if he didn’t come back up for air considering your eyes were glued to his friend. Jungkook was going to fucking strangle Hoseok for inviting him.

His eyes drift over to the right, seeing Hoseok, Iseul, Yoongi & Rina taking turns jumping off of it while Jimin floats on a flamingo floatie a few feet away. He starts to paddle his way over, not hearing any protest from you or his friend just reassures him that he made the right choice.

When Taehyung deems Jungkook is far enough he calls you closer, “Wanna know a secret?” That piques your interest, inching towards him with a curious face, “What if I told you I know someone who has a massive heart on for you.”

“Heart on?”

He laughs again, raking his hair off his face and nodding at you, “Yeah heart on, like a boner but for your heart.”

Note to self, yes all of Jung Hoseoks friends were just as immature as Jungkook was.

“I would tell you that I hope the person you say isn’t secretly married with kids.”

He floats onto his back again, his arms lazily paddling him to circle around you, “Oh no, our Jungkookie is definitely single.” He brings one hand up to cover his mouth, pretending to have slipped up.

“So what you’re saying is you don’t wanna fuck me?”

Your response is not one he expects but the way he bursts into laughter makes you smile, you had caught on to Taehyung’s antics, noting how he was friendly when you two were alone and only amped his flirting when Jungkook was present. You weren’t sure why he was using you to irritate Jungkook but if what he said was true it surprised you.

His loud laugh draws everyones attention and he rights himself up as to not choke on water again, “Like a brazzers video was it?” He teases, “He told me about your little smooch a few weeks ago.”

“Im sorry our little what?”

He wipes the water off his face, “Yeah, you came home drunk as fuck and he took you to bed and your predator ass planted one on him, with no consent. Shame on you.”

You splash water onto him, Jungkook sees it from his spot on the pier, a scowl on his face at seeing you acting playful with his friend, blissfully unaware that he was the topic of your discussion.

“Can you please grow a pair and tell her you love her.” Iseul moans out when she sees the look on the youngests face.

“Wait what?” Your friend asks and Jungkook turns around to give Iseul and Hoseok an exasperated look, “Seriously?”

Iseul just shrugs from her spot sat on the wood, not giving a damn about outing his crush in front of your friend and Hoseok just smiles, his foot planting on the center of Iseuls back and giving her a shove until she screams as she gets pushed into the water, beer bottle and all. He gives Jungkook a highfive until Iseul pops back up, her eyes full of rage as she holds up her ruined drink, “Jung Hoseok what the fuck!”

“Sorry babe, you kinda deserved it.”

Rina nudges Jungkook with her knee, her face making it very clear that Jungkook needs to fess up before she very loudly called you over. He sighs and hauls himself up until he’s standing and even though he’s towering over her Rinas face doesn’t soften, “Stop staring at me like that.” He grunts, “I just have a crush on her, its not like I confessed to something despicable.”

She crosses her hands over her chest as she stares at you and Taehyung still talking in the water and she can tell you’re not into him, you were both playful but she knew you very well, your flirting tactics not coming out to play with Taehyung but Jungkook doesn’t seem to notice this. She also knew that you’d secretly bend over for Jungkook if he ever asked but he didn’t have to know that right now, “Well you better say something cause it looks like your buddys making more progress in one day than you have the entire time you’ve known her.”

He groans in annoyance again, flicking water droplets at her face and deciding he was over this conversation, walking back to the cabin, not caring that he was dripping water everywhere.

You see him stalking away looking pissed off and Taehyung smirks, after coming to terms with the fact that you had in fact kissed Jeon Jungkook it only took a few more minutes of talking for you to also start confessing to not exactly being opposed to sleeping with him as well. Taehyung nudges your shoulder, “I swear to god if you don’t follow him I will be offended. No ones telling you to bang him, just talk because he swears you hate him.”

When you turn to glare at him he spits water at you until you’re relenting, “Fine, but if this is some sick prank I’ll shove my foot up your ass.”

“Ooh kinky.” He winks at you, laughing and beginning to paddle away when you turn and start wading out of the water. The sun beats on your back as you step out of the cold water, and you’re tempted to just go back and act like your conversation with Taehyung never happened but you’re curious now.

When you reach the back porch you hose yourself down, getting rid of any of the mud you trudged over before patting yourself dry with the towel you laid over the porch railing.

From the pier Iseul is pulling herself back up, announcing that she was about to go inside but Hoseok grabs her, all of them noticing you following Jungkook, “Fuck no, Y/N and Jungkook are the only ones in the house.”

She lets Hoseok keep his arms wrapped around her and smiles, crediting herself for being the one to push you two together and Hoseok groans, attempting to push her back into the water but she latches onto him, making them both tumble in with a splash.

You shut out their screams when you step into the house and close the sliding door, entering the kitchen and spotting Jungkook stood against the island, one of your wine coolers held against his lips. When he sees you staring at it he pulls it away quickly, “Shit, I’m sorry. I should’ve asked before grabbing one.” The last thing he needed was another oat milk fiasco.

You just shrug as you approach the island, resting your body against the granite across from him, “Nah, help yourself. Whats got your panties in a bunch?”

He sets the bottle down softly as he watches you, your hands clasped together, stretched out in front of you as you bent over the counter innocently. His teeth tug at the bar in the center of his lip, his inky strands covering his eyes but you can see his gaze peeking through, “Did I ever do anything to you for you to dislike me this much?”

You straighten up at his question, a frown tugging at your lips, you didn’t dislike him, you found him immature and he liked to push your buttons on purpose but you knew he was harmless. Obviously Jungkook didn’t know this considering Taehyung had just told you he thinks you hate him. “What, Jungkook I don’t dislike you?”

He scoffs, taking a swig of his drink with his brows raised, not believing you in the slightest, “Then why are you so mean to me when ever I’m around you.”

“Because you’re mean to me! You always say shit to get under my skin.”

Jungkook laughs at that, pushing his hair back and tossing the empty bottle into the paper bag set up on the counter, “Yeah because you’re easy to annoy.”

Your arms stretch out at his statement, “And so are you, you don’t see me moping like a baby. Besides I didn’t do anything to you out there so don’t try to pin your bad attitude on me today.”

He opens the fridge again, pulling out a water bottle instead before turning back around and staring at you, “Really, you didn’t do anything?”

You glare right back at him, walking around to meet him and snatch the water bottle out of his hands, call it even for him taking one of your wine coolers. “Please enlighten me on how I managed to ruin your day by not saying a word to you.”

Between you two running into the lake until he paddled away the only exchange you had was a curse word & Jungkook acknowledging the freezing water, where could you have possibly pissed him off.

He chooses on foregoing grabbing another water, his hands crossing over his chest, the muscles bulging out at the action but you force yourself to look away, “You objectifying my friend and talking about his monster cock isn’t you doing anything?”

You freeze from drinking the water, your cheeks ballooning out as you keep it in your mouth because what the fuck. Objectifying? You swallow the liquid, full on laughing now, theres no way he’s being serious. “You were the one that brought up his dick, are you dense?”

Okay, you had him there but he wasn’t going to admit defeat that easy, “Sure and you kept it going.”

You laugh louder at that, twisting the cap back onto the water bottle and tossing it at his chest lightly, smirking when you see him scramble to catch it, “The amount of times I’ve had to hear unwarranted stories about your dick in or around someone is fine but me joking with Taehyung is crossing a line?”

Jungkook presses his lips together, his mind repeating what everyone has been telling him all day. Tell her you jackass. “Yes because it fucking sucks hearing that shit from you.” He bites his tongue, stopping himself from blurting out the most important part, but his statement is enough to get you to believe what Taehyung had said earlier. Did Jungkook actually have a heart on for you?

“Why, are you jealous?”

“Yes.” He admits almost immediately, his response catching you both off guard, but the smirk on your face only gets bigger. Jungkook is wary of your reaction, not exactly fond of the way you look like you just caught your prey. When you reach out, your fingers gently touching his shoulders his wariness only deepens.

“Why would you be jealous about me wanting to fuck your friend?” Jungkook says nothing, your fingers continuing to trail up and down his shoulders softly and he likes the feeling of you touching him, wanting to lean into your touch but he’s not sure if you’re fucking with him or not. “Who knew all it would take was one kiss for Jeon Jungkook to get possessive.”

He blanches at your sentence, “Wait you remember?”

“Of course I do,” you lie, not wanting to tell him that Taehyung had been the one to remind you. You wanted to see how far you could push him until he admitted to something. The typical Jungkook you were used to was the one who went to bars and clubs and managed to score a handful of girls numbers before taking one home, the countless stories you’ve heard being proof of that. The Jungkook stood in front of you did not live up to the reputation you had seen.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“I mean you were wasted so I just didn’t think you’d remember...” he trails off, unconsciously stepping back until hes pressed against the fridge.

“You wanna refresh my memory?” You’re half teasing him, half serious, enjoying seeing Jungkook looking like he’s about to explode.

He doesn’t get a chance to respond, the sound of the sliding door making you take a big step back before looking over. Jimin had his head peeking through the opening, a small grimace on his face as he realizes he interrupted something, “Sorry, we’re gonna go tubing if you guys wanna join.”

Jungkook hopes you say no because he can’t find the balls to speak up but you nod instead, turning to face Jungkook again, “Maybe later then.” Is all you say before turning around and following Jimin back out to the lake.

He watches you leave, bending over the island and groaning into the granite, where had that come from and why was he kinda into the way you spoke to him? Jungkook stands back up, taking a gulp of his water and following after you and Jimin.

Even when you’re all gathered on the boat, Rina being dragged in a giant circle tube beside Yoongi the both of them screaming, he can’t get your conversation out of him mind. His eyes focused in on seeing you laughing hysterically as you record your friend, a smile spreading across his face because your laugh is contagious.

When you hop onto the tube next, dragging Taehyung with you to further egg Jungkook on, Jimin slides over beside Jungkook and sighs, “Sorry about barging in earlier.” Jungkook just shakes his head, telling him not to worry about it, he didn’t mind it. Your words had spurred him on and all he wanted to do now was rip off that lifejacket you wore and take you in front of his friends but he knew no one would appreciate it.

Later in the night everyone gathers inside and does their own thing, a few people playing board games while you retreat into your room, feeling sluggish from the water and sun so you sleep through the dinner everyone eats.

When you finally emerge from the room, your hair damp from your shower you find the living room dimly lit and empty, the clock above the stove letting you know it was 9 at night. There was two plates left out on the counter, wrapped in foil and you knew it was meant for you. As you near it you see the scrap of paper next to it, Iseul’s handwriting standing out.

Left on a hike to go stargazing, text us when its clear to come back.

You frown at the message, what did she mean by that?

Regardless you peel back the foil and smile at the food she had left for you, popping it into the microwave and picking yourself up to hop onto the counter as you wait.

When you slip your phone out and start to scroll through your socials the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs scares you, your eyes flicking up and seeing Jungkook trudging down, a baggy crew neck on him and his face looking flushed from the sun hitting it.

“You didn’t go on the hike?” You ask as he approaches you slowly, his face looks sleepy and you can tell he also took a nap from the way his eyes blink at you lazily.

“Hike?” He rasps out, his hand ruffling up his already messy hair, a small frown on his face from the foggy feeling he still had from just waking up.

“Yeah,” you hum, pulling out your plate and starting to eat it on the counter, “they left on a hike or something. Theres a plate there if you haven’t already eaten.”

He looks at where you’re pointing and he smiles when he sees it, his eyes also spotting the note left and skimming it. His friends were such instigators.

He lingers behind you, torn between eating or doing something to you. You’re hunched over the counter, your legs rocking you against it as you happily much on some of the roasted potatoes. His eyes lingered on your legs, your skin still exposed in a loose pair of cotton shorts, a baggy tshirt hanging off your shoulder and letting him see the tattoo of a bee hovering over a sunflower.

You can feel him stood behind you and you freeze, looking over your shoulder at him with your brows raised, “Why are you standing like that?”

He shakes his head, relaxing the stiff way he stood and leaning against the counter instead, flicking his hair out of his face as you keep staring at him. “Just thinking about what you said earlier.”

You pop a piece of chicken in your mouth as you hum, “What did I say?” pretending to act confused, a smirk curling up on your lip when you see the deadpan look he give you as he pushes off the counter.

The nervous Jungkook from earlier is gone, the shock from you egging him on earlier had passed and it just solidified that he wanted to have you. “About me refreshing your memory of our little rendezvous.”

You laugh at his term, setting your fork down to fully turn to him, “Do you want me to kiss you again?”

He smirks at you, now standing a foot away from you, your back pressed against the counter as you craned your head up to stare at him, “Among other things.”

“Other things?”

“Yeah,” he mumbles, his hand reaching out to cup under your chin gently, “I’d like to bend you over this counter and fuck you until you’re crying. If you’re into that.” He smiles at the small gasp you let out, your eyes gleaming with desire at his words. You had thought you had the one up on him earlier but his change was a welcomed one, you wanted to experience the Jungkook you had heard about, rough and cocky.

You rest back onto your elbows as you stare at him, letting his thumb rub under your lip, “Oh really? Are you all talk?”

Jungkook scoffs, dropping his hands to cage you between him and the counter, his head dropping down a bit until your noses nudged together. “No, I always deliver.”

You don’t get a chance to respond, his head tilting slightly until your lips are together, the cold bar of his piercing pressing against you. Jungkook feels you relax into the kiss, glad that you weren’t pushing him away like he always swore you would. When he tests the water, gently licking his way into your mouth you groan, your hands coming up to clutch onto his sweater to tug him closer until his leg is between yours.

Kissing Jungkook felt natural, maybe it was the pent of sexual frustration you two had apparently had with one another but you just wanted to get to it. You drop one hand to trail down his thigh, palming his growing erection through his sweats.

He groans, pulling back from the kiss to rest his forehead against your, his soft breaths hitting your face as you continue to stroke him. “Feel that?” He hums softly, “Just wanna fuck you.”

You laugh gently, kissing his neck and feeling him roll his hips into your grasp, “How are you supposed to make me cry when you’re this needy?” Your teeth nip his skin, his hips stuttering when you do.

Jungkook just chuckles, the sound continuing when he trails his own hand down until hes dipping into waistband of your shorts, his fingers coming into contact with the wet spot on your underwear, “Keep it up.” He warns, “I’ll remember that in a bit.”

Your hands tighten their hold on him when he pushes your underwear aside to touch you directly, his fingers teasing your skin softly until he’s rolling your clit in a tantalizing manner. When you drop your head back and glare at him he just smiles, “Who’s needy now?”

“Still not crying.” You bite back.

Jungkook looks at you with his brows raised, new set determination on his face as he nods, stepping back from you and hooking his fingers into the waistband of your shorts and underwear, tugging them down your legs in a flash.

The cool air inside hits your wet folds and you gasp, kicking your discarded clothing aside on the floor and letting him drop to his knees in front of you. His long hair falls in front of his eyes, his hands grasping the top of your thighs to slide your legs apart with a grin.

He can see you wanting to speak up so he beats you to the punch, his nose nudging into your clit as he teasingly dips his tongue in between your folds to lick a broad stripe up. You let out a shuddered laugh, your hands reaching down to tangle in his head when he spreads you open with his fingers and starts to eat you out like a man starved.

Your eyes shut, your head falling back at a particular hard suck he gives your clit, his tongue going back to circle around your entrance to lap up your wetness. He groans at the taste of you, your hands tugging at his hair when he falls into a rhythm that has you quivering.

He slips two fingers into you, the feeling of your walls clamping down on him making him moan in anticipation of how you would feel around his cock.

Just like Jungkook is in every aspect of his life, he’s shameless in the way he pleasures you, the sounds of him slurping against you in combination with his fingers thrusting into you has you hurdling towards the edge faster than you’d like to admit.

You rest your weight on your elbow behind you, feeling your legs start to tremble and Jungkook notices, his arm wrapping around your thigh to help stabilize you. He can’t even get himself to gloat at having you fall apart this quickly, instead he enjoys you rolling your hips into his face, tugging his hair hard, your inner walls spasming as you reach your climax.

“Oh fuck.” You moan out, squeezing your eyes shut as your whole body is lit up, Jungkooks tongue continuing to flick your clit as you cum, his fingers slowing down slightly as you come down.

He can hear you breathing harshly, your fingers gently raking through his hair while he gives your pussy one last kiss before hes standing back up. His mouth and chin are covered in your arousal, his hand tugs up his shirt to wipe at his face, peeling it off his body and tossing it carelessly onto the floor.

“You’re not crying but its a start.” He mumbles out, his eyes trailing over your face as you stare at him fucked out. His talk was true, the small tidbits you’ve heard of him being able to make girls cum in record time hadn’t been a lie to boost his ego.

You look between you both, seeing his cock tenting in his sweats and you smile as you reach your hand into them, wrapping around his heavy length. He sees how your eyes widen at his size, you can tell he’s big and you haven’t even properly seen it yet.

When you tug them off you marvel at his size, big dicks would forever be your weakness and of course he’d have one. “I really wanna suck your dick,” you start, a small smile creeping up on your face as you give his cock a small pump, “but I’m not trying to barf my dinner up on the floor. Can’t have two girls puking over your dick in your lifetime right?” You knew his dick would make you choke and if you hadn’t just eaten you wouldn’t care, but barfing was definitely not a kink of yours.

Jungkook rolls his eyes, a laugh escaping his lips, “You’re the worst.” He shuts his eyes as you both start to chuckle. Jungkook doesn’t care, he was trying to make you cry, he didn’t need to have his dick sucked to do that.

“Its not just my height thats Titan size huh.” He jokes, laughing harder when you release his dick and groan, your faux annoyance being shown when you let him slide your shirt off of you, his hands coming up to cup your exposed breasts.

“No, I am not calling your dick Titan sized.”

“Oh no?” He asks, stepping closer until his length is pressed between your folds, a slow thrust starting that has you groaning, “This Titan dick can make you feel real good though.” He can barely utter out the sentence until he’s laughing again, burying his head into your neck at how stupid he sounded.

“You’re insufferable, I swear if you have an attack on titan fantasy I am walking away.” He lets out a playful whine, his mouth latching onto that tattoo he always wanted to kiss, his tongue softly licking at the skin as he sucks it, pulling back and humming when he sees the purple splotch in between the petals of the peony.

“I’m not that big of a weeb, can still make you feel good tho.” He mutters giving your lips another kiss, feeling you smile against him, your hands pushing him back by the chest.

You turn around, bending over the counter and shaking your hips slightly, “Show me.”

He bites his lip, his eyes staring at the slick coating your pussy, trailing down your thighs and he feels his dick twitch, not needing to be told twice. Jungkook presses his length against you, rutting between your folds, the both of you sighing as he coats his dick in your wetness.

“Remember, I wanna see you crying.” Is all he says before he’s pushing into you, the tip of him slipping in and he marvels at the way you spread around his girth as he thrusts further into you, a small moan leaving you when he bottoms out.

You wanna tell him that you won’t be crying tonight but the way he fills you up has you seeing stars, his dick nudging all the right spots inside of you so all you can do is tighten your walls around him and gasp for him to move.

Jungkook grasps your hips, his thumb tracing the outline of your back tattoo as he pulls back and starts a slow pace, determined to find the rhythm that has you falling apart.

When your hands grip the counter in front of you, helplessly trying to find purchase, your fingers knock into your dinner plate and swipe it into the sink beside you but you don’t register the noise and Jungkook grins when he hears the loud moan coming from you when he dick hits the back wall of your cervix.

You’re still sensitive from your last orgasm, so the feel of his thick cock stretching you open has you keening, your hips rutting back to meet his thrusts that have grown in speed, “Who’s needy now huh?” He grunts out, loving the sound of your skin slapping together, “Trying to fuck yourself on my cock, maybe you should do all the work then.”

When his hips still you whimper, twisting your head around to see him giving you an evil smirk, “Go on.” He urges, guiding your hips with his hands to get your started.

A heavy sigh fills the air as your hands press firmly onto the counter to ground yourself as you start to rock back onto him, a slow start until your need to cum again takes over and you speed up your movements.

“Good girl.” He praises, his hand reaching forward to push your hair over your shoulder, his hand trailing down your spine until it reaches your ass, his hand palming your flesh as he groans when he locks into the view of his dick, seeing the way you’re creaming on it.

The sweetest moans reach his ears, he can feel the way your velvety walls tighten around him further, “Fuck Jungkook.” You moan out, you can feel the sweat building up on your skin from exertion and he takes sympathy on you, knowing you want to cum again.

He leans over a presses a kiss against your shoulder before he takes over again, resuming the brutal pace he was pounding you with earlier and you sigh in relief, fully slumping forward and letting him have his way with you.

“You feel so good Jungkookie.” You breathe out and he smiles as he lets his hand slip around to your front, his fingers finding your clit again and the contact has you moaning again. His rough hands helping you reach your peek again, “Oh my god, don’t stop.”

He doesn’t plan on it, loving the way you’re clamping down on him and mumbling nonsense into the cool granite, “Don’t worry, I got you.”

With a few more thrusts you’re falling apart, pressing your forehead against the counter and moaning his name out louder than you thought was possible. Your friends made a good call vacating the house because there was no way you’d be able to keep quiet.

“Thats it.” He coos, pulling his hand away from your clit without slowing down his pace. Your legs felt like jello, glad you had a place to rest on while he continued to jackhammer into you. The first signs of overstimulation started to prick into you, small whines leaving your lips and Jungkook takes notice.

He pulls out of you slowly, his hands grasping your hips to turn you around. Your body is pliable in his hands, letting him move you and haul you up onto the counter, your feet dangling off the edge and a hazy smile on your face.

He presses another kiss against you, letting your tongues tangle together as he grabs your arms and wraps them around his neck, coming back down to hook under your thighs as he slides back into you.

The way you groan into his mouth makes his cock throb, your soaking entrance letting him glide right into you, “Hurts.” You whine out softly when he starts to thrust, not sure if you’d be able to handle another orgasm but Jungkook shushes you softly with another kiss.

“You can do one more for me right baby?” He asks, sucking on your lower lip as he rocks into you slowly. His eyes are half lidded and you can feel how hard he is in you, your body still trembling slightly from your last orgasm but you nod anyways, letting him kiss his way down your face until he reaches your neck again, soft praises leaving his lips.

Your fingers tangle into his hair again as you slump against him, letting him hold you up. You trail along his tattoos, tracing the giant death moth spanned across his collarbone, the tip of the wing reaching the bottom of his neck.

He’s grunting softly against you, getting lost in the feeling of you, the added touches and kisses you plant on his skin igniting the fire inside him. His arms scoop you closer, his hands spreading against your lower back as he speeds up his thrusts, your legs still wrapped around his arms.

The way his dick curves inside you has you moaning again, the pleasure creeping back up and your head falls back as you feel the pressure building again. You’re not sure you could handle coming again but Jungkook seems determined to get you there, rolling into you, the feeling of his pelvis rubbing your clit is too much. Your hands cling onto his back, your fingers digging into the flames and dragon that occupied the space.

“Fuck I can feel you squeezing me.” He gasps out, “You can cum again sweetheart its okay.”

You squeeze your eyes shut, hearing him grunting into your ear, his voice dropping into a gravel as he nears his edge as well. You’re clinging onto him for your life, gasping loudly when you reach your third orgasm of the night, the force of it making your mind go blank.

You don’t tune into to the small shriek of his name, the growl he lets out when you tighten around him tighter than before, his hips rearing into yours in a sloppier way until he’s cumming, hips surging forward to bury himself deeper into you as his cock twitches.

You come back when he moans your name out, the feeling of his cum filling you up making you mewl against him. He thrusts shallowly a few more times before pulling out with a sigh, letting your legs fall limp over the edge.

His cum drips out of you, slipping through your folds and down your ass until it pools onto the counter beneath you and he smirks, his eyes coming up to look at you and his expression gets bigger when he sees the tear streaks on your cheeks. His hand cups them, his thumb sliding across your face and wiping them with a laugh, “I told you I’d make you cry.”

You don’t have it in you to be the usual brat you are with him, not after cumming this hard three times in a row so you just pout at him and lean forward to kiss him again, this time being more gentle and slow paced than the last.

“How was that?” He mumbles against your lips, letting you pull him in to you, wrapping your arms around his tiny waist as you nuzzle into his chest.

Jungkook feels you laughing against his skin, “How was that?” You mock as you give him a squeeze, “Let’s just say I’ll cry over your Titan cock any day.”

The both of you burst into laughter, Jungkook pressing a kiss onto the top of your head as you two just stay there. Jungkook and you had officially crossed the line from being bratty friends to sleeping with each other. Neither of you knew what it meant but it seemed like a conversation for tomorrow morning, right now you were content with just holding him.

So when your phone vibrates beside you you’re reluctant to pull away, so Jungkook compromises by reaching it for you and handing it over.

You see its a message from Iseul and you unlock it, your face heating up as you groan and show the message to Jungkook, his face turning just as red as he sees what she sent.

Iseul 10:15pm : Thank you for the show, I hope you two realize we have security cameras in the kitchen and living room you horn dogs.

The two of you peek over at the corner of the room giving a wave and smiling shyly at the blinking security camera staring back at you. Maybe she could send you the footage for keepsake.

[beann-e]

read part one here

Different Ways To Say Sorry

Your body sat idle in the hallway as you kept roaming your thoughts and only coming back to earlier .

After the argument with your boyfriend you were left alone , alone with akaashi who normally would have kept his mouth closed but decided not to when he seen your stuck expression after kuroos comment

As soon as you heard the loud bang of the house door and the engine start up kuroos yelling for bokuto to open the door and to slow down made your body fall instantly.

Marking the spot where you’d pushed bokuto into the wall cursing yourself for your actions . Shivering as you felt the wave of coldness wash over you thinking about the harmful words you’d said

“ y/n you didn’t mean any of it it’s ok “

akaashi’s soft voice came out as he dropped the sign he held that he helped bokuto make for you to welcome you home for your birthday.

Bokuto was childish and you knew it but he meant no harm he was just happy and excited little things excited him and when he was happy you were

So , if he was sad you would only be 2x as sad if the one who created his sadness was yourself

“ I heard you telling bokuto off and — thats not you not once since you’ve dated bokuto—san in the 4 years that you’ve been dating have I seen you get that mad “

he sighed as he hesitantly tried to squat near you

“ d-do you mind “ you nodded your head in a no allowing him to sit next to you while you cried into his shoulder

“ everyone has bad days y/n-san and everyone has had a moment in their life where they’ve said something they regret and that’s ok as long as the person you’ve said it to knows you didn’t mean it “

he squeezed you as you cried heavily “ y/n we all know bokuto is — “ he thought for a moment before speaking “ different from your average person — hes in a way easy “

he sighed as he spoke “ what I mean is you don’t have to do much to say sorry to bokuto so don’t cry really i’m sure he knows you didn’t mean any of it just — for me please when you see him again — please tell him you love him remind him you still love him “

akaashi rubbed your head “ because he’s one of those people when someone gets mad at him — especially someone he loves — if they get mad at him he immediately feels like he’s getting disciplined and like he’s done something really really wrong to be rewarded that behavior — any other award besides praise really “

you loosened your grip on akaashi’s shirt lifting your head to cry into your own hands “ so please when he comes back to you please just make it simple for him he won’t understand many words and won’t believe you if you say a simple sorry he’ll still think your upset and be scared that he’ll screw up again — I promise you he’s never gonna want to touch a stove in his life again— so I wonder what he’ll eat when he’s on the roa-“ akaashi laughed as he quickly calmed down coughing before wiping his sweaty hands on his pants

“ oh um— i’m sorry I thought a joke was a way to go that’s typically what bokuto does in these situations— or maybe you don’t want to keep talking about bokuto “ akaashi spoke out loud running through his thoughts and filtering them out loud

“ oh I should’ve kept myself out of business that’s not mine I feel so disgusted i’m telling you how to treat your boyfriend I- i’m sorry y/- “

“ akaashi I don’t want to trouble you — you may leave“

“ oh “ his voice came out in surprise before he sat confused “ oh — I no I couldn’t “

“ it’s fine akaashi I’ll be ok I just need some time alone “

he sighed he felt bad really but “ i’m sorry y/n I don’t think bokuto would ever forgive me — I don’t think i’d ever forgive myself if I let you stay in your home alone after something like that “

you stared at the ceiling as if you were actually talking to someone conveying sadness as your tears were still leaking “ keiji just please — it’s been a long day and I think I just screwed up my relationship — so could you please just leave me to my thoughts i’ll — i’ll be fine “

akaashi sighed as he moved to stand hugging you softly on the way up “ y/n i’m sorry to treat you like a child — to even put my foot down like this in a house that’s not mine and I don’t pay the bills for but — the most I can do and i’ll allow myself to do is leave the house and wait outside until bokuto comes back “

he sighed “ or at least texts me and tells me he’s gonna come back home because — if not I wouldn’t want you here alone just replaying that fight again and again like i’ve known bokuto to do when he’s lost matches you two are alike that way “

“ I-i’m fine with that just please “

he nodded his head as if you could see him your eyes were stuck to the same wall that was in front of the one bokuto was pushed into— your back up against it bit staring ahead at the corner he stood in when he left.

Hearing the door close and lock assuming akaashi had locked it for you with his key you two made for him so he could check on bokuto anytime he was home and you weren’t

Your body moving to stare directly at the door from the hallway so you’d always have an eye on it to see if bokuto ever returned home tonight.

‘ please’ you thought calmly

It wasn’t a short wait it was rather long You knew it had to be late in the morning when you finally heard the clicking and clacking around by the door until your eyes looked up eyebags weighing them down as you shook in your suit pants that you wore suddenly feeling sweaty as you ripped off the suit jacket.

The rattling and shaking at the door stopping assuming whoever it was —- was taking a moment to think before they walked in as if giving you some time to understand who it was and to prepare

The door opened slowly as your boyfriends hair came into view him standing at the doorstep eyes swollen and glazed over ,fist scratched and hands red , body shaking softly.

Your eyes watered as you just stared at his face thinking ‘ I did that ‘ mentally beating yourself up as your tears fell soft whimpers making their way out of your mouth as you covered it trying to conseal your spot on the floor so he wouldn’t notice

His eyes lifting up as he took a really deep breath and spoke “ y-y/n “ he called voice cracking as he tried again

“ y/n i went to play volleyball— at —at the gym and I got so mad I hurt myself from the constant spikes“ he stayed at the doorstop —door opened fully showing off everything he had with him.

His hand holding 3 roses , left hand holding a bag which , you weren’t sure consisted of and right next to his foot a box “ p-please answe-answer me “

you gulped you didn’t know if you could

You really didn’t know if you could tell your boyfriend that you were directly in front of him and he only had to look down .

“ I-it’s 4 in the mo-morning and I — I’ve been crying since 7 last night — so — so I can only imagine how your feeling h-how long you’ve been crying “

The flowers he held were soon dropped down by his legs as he only held on loosely to the bottom “ I-I dont want to just walk in y/n b-because I don’t know if I’m allowed to I-if I can so please — please let me know your ok “

your voice was soft he could barely hear it as you looked down at the floor

” y-your alwa—here I am being an a-ass to you earlier and you — you care to come back and ask if i’m ok first “ you felt your body shudder in a cry

“ I-i’m such an asshole — I was mad at work — I came home upset —- I brought my attitude home and my first thought was to be m-mean to someone who I love “

Bokutos body moved quickly to drop the things at the door you couldn’t even find it in you to care that he left the door wide open as he ran to you checking you out and lifting your head to inspect it before he stuttered thinking over his actions before kissing you hard on your mouth before he pulled back whispering out small apologies for the action and how he felt bad if he made you uncomfortable

you moved to stand up as he backed away going to grab everything and dragging it inside the house speaking to you as you sat down “ y/n I “

“ ko I just don’t want— “

his voice was hard for the first time today shutting you up instantly “ be quiet y/n “ his eyebrows were hard and done up in a furrow

“ I-I know your pissed at me and I know I can be a bit much and I — “ he was crying

“ I know i’m a child — people see me as a kid and i’m not I swear I can be adult I can be as adult as you want me to just so I can stay with you —I can pay taxes and figure them out if you wanted me to —if you wanted me to go get a real job and quit volleyball i’d do it all for you— because I love you and I don’t care if you want me out of the house “ his tears fell

“ I don’t care if you want me to have no closet space and want to burn my clothes but please — please don’t say you don’t love me it — it I can’t live without your love - you — you do so much for me and i’m so thankful anytime I have a meet your right there — anytime i’m frustrated your there explaining it — anytime I have to travel your on the phone talking to my management team finding tickets for you and all the other s/o “ he wiped at his eyes trying to see better

“ please forgive me i’m sorry i’m a m-man child I don’t know what that is but i’m so sorry for being it and i’m sorry it’s something you hate and I don’t wanna be what you hate y/n i’m sorry — I didn’t know what to do “

he was just saying nonsense now since his tears were clouding his brain “ I didn’t know where to go and kuroo was talking so much and I couldn’t focus and I ended up just buying all your favorite stuff because I thought you didn’t love me anymore so I wanted to beg for your forgiveness at the doorstop just now but —and then you were crying and I — I wanted to kiss you because your so pretty and I hate when you cry unless it’s over me winning and scoring the last point in my game — you look so pretty and proud then — and I like making you proud not sad “

he was clawing at his cheeks and eyes trying to get the tears to stop “ I— I just — my credit card I just bought everything I knew you liked —y/n — baby I bought a dog I don’t — I was — I bought a dog because you said dogs are pretty I bought a hat because you said the hat could go well with an outfit you had “

you smiled as your tears were falling too “ babe I bought a balloon because you said you like the way they lose air after 3 days — I even bough—“

“ baby it’s fine “ you cried as you moved to hug him squeezing tightly “ it’s ok I — this is my fault i’m so sorry “

you cried into his shirt “ your not a man child — which means —you don’t need to know actually it’ll just make things worse “

“ are you saying my shirts are too tight baby “

he cried out “ y/n that’s not funny — I’m buff —I build ok — I workout there’s nothing I can do about it “

“ no ko your perfect the way you are your my buff boyfriend and I love you for it your my brick wall baby“

“ I am “

“ yes and I love you and i’m so proud of how far you’ve come since high school i’m proud of you no matter where you travel to or what you do “

you smiled “ that’s why I missed so many days of work not because I just wanted to be home but because you were coming home for the first time in 2 months and I wanted to be home with you making sure you were comfortable and telling you how much I missed you “

he smiled as you spoke “ your an amazing boyfriend kou and I can’t imagine anyone who wouldnt be happy with you “

“ but I just spent all the money you and akaashi allow me to have on my card “

“ you can have more “ you laughed “ your not broke kou it’s just so you don’t spend all the money you make from volleyball “

he hugged you as you continued to speak “ do you forgive me “

he hugged you tighter kissing you softly as it turned into a heated kiss you trying to stop it before he turned it into more “ why’d you stop “ he said sadly

“ bokuto our door is wide open and “ your eyes came up in a raise

“ what babe what are you looking for “

your voice was high pitched as you looked at all the bags around you “ bo— baby where’s the dog “

his eyes came up in a crease “ what dog “ his brain finally clicking and hurrying to rumage through everything on the floor. Your bodies moving together in a fast pace as you moved over to look around the house.

The chaos going on inside your house all night rivaled the one that was taking place the next day in the car that sat right in your driveway

“ u-uh ok “ akaashi’s face was made up in a straight line as he looked down closing his car door softly

“ s-so um i’m gonna guess bokuto bought you “

the dog cocked its head to the side staring up at the tall male “ d-do you um wanna go back inside with him or “

the dog barked loudly as if scared “ yeah i’m gonna take that as a no “

he reached down to pick up the dog before opening the car door and setting it down in the passenger seat speaking as the dog whimpered “ yeah I don’t trust them either — they lost a whole dog in one night — “

akaashi’s face turned as he saw bokuto walking down the steps and to his car him throwing his coat over the animal “ i’m sorry — i’m sorry — you can come out in a moment “

“hey — hey akaashi “

“ b-bokuto-san hey “

“ aw did you stay out here all night i’m so sorry “ he smiled “ me and y/n are fine thank you for staying here with her “

“ yeah it was no problem really bokuto “

“ hey akaashi I — I actually lost a dog last night and I — I was wondering have you seen it “

“ uh dog ? why’d you have a dog “ bokuto froze as he bit his lip “ so you don’t have it good good “

he moved to leave patting akaashi’s car before he heard a ruffle come from inside “ hey dude somethings moving next to you “

“ oh — it’s um just my phone — I have to go in to work today “

“ wow you have a huge phone “ bokutos voice was raised in happiness “ what model is it I think I want a new one — especially if it’s big enough to fit in my hands with out my thumbs clicking weird buttons “

he pouted “ it’s not fun to retype messages “ akaashi moved to start the car up “ s-sorry bokuto really gotta go but i’ll be back sometime tomorrow “

“ o-oh ok bye akaashi “ he waved as he moved back up the stairs you meeting him at the top laughing as you pulled him back in the house

“ damn thought he would’ve saw the dog “

“ koutaro — baby he has the dog “ you smiled as you laughed pulling his pouting body into a hug “ he stole our dog “

“ well that’s not very nice “

“ let’s let him have it baby he needs it more than us — he can take care of it better “

[sokkas-honour]

dream boy: part 3 - sokka x reader

pairing: sokka x fem!reader

request: part 3 was requested by @missmorosis

wc: 2.7k

notes: i’m terribly sorry if it may seemed a bit rushed or not exactly consistent but i personally liked the way it ended. also this is the final part, i might make an epilogue if i actually finish everything i need to do.

part one | part one 1/2 | part two

sokka wasn’t able to see you until monday, purposefully ignoring all the texts from yours friends, not wanting to know if sokka actually told them what had happened or if he had decided to keep it to himself, either way, you were better off just staying off your phone until school started. you only unlocked your phone to text zuko back and even then you didn't always have the courage to do so.

you had made sure to wake up early in order to not cross paths with the watertribe boy, his sibling or just any of your friends until you absolutely had to, preferring to simply distance yourself from the others. of course you couldn't avoid them forever, you had over half of your classes with at least one of them, two of those being with sokka, the guy who you especially didn't want to see, history and gym. gym would be easy to avoid him in, you had become acquaintances with this lovely girl called jin, whom you also shared your math class with, you could just spend the whole period with her and avoid him. your real problem was going to be history. your teacher, mister kuzon, had informed the class that there would be a group project on any cultural aspect from the water tribe, and he had chosen the groups. the chance of you actually being paired with sokka was miniscule but the universe hadn’t seemed to be going easy on you lately.

and much to your dismay, the universe was in fact against you. when your history teacher’s voice had posted the groups, your heart had started racing as you approached the board to see the pairs, your heart was racing in fear and it dropped when you saw the name y/n next to sokka.

after being asked to sit next to your partner to get started, you stayed silent as you plopped down on the chair next to the boy who you were still trying to avoid, staying silent and keeping your eyes in front of you.

“are you going to work with me or is it going to be a silent treatment the whole time.” he questioned, turning to face you, arm hooked around the back of his chair as he looked at you desperately for any sign of you acknowledging his presence.

“i was thinking we could talk about the differences in the cuisine in the north and south.” you mumbled, chin on your hand as you kept your gaze on the board in front of you, ignoring the boy who was still searching for an answer.

“yeah, sounds good.” sokka sighed, giving up on receiving a straight answer from you. he turned back in his seat, disappointment radiating off of him, making you bite your lip in guilt. you shot him a glance from the corner of your eye as you saw him discreetly take his phone out to open the notes app but before you could see what he was typing he turned to face you, catching you right in the act.

“uh, saturday at your place?” seemed like the only logical way out of the embarrassing situation you had just walked into, still not breaking the staring between the two of you. you felt your heart speed up a bit at the extended eye contact, not having looked into his blue eyes in awhile, the last time being before you stormed out of his house after your confession.

“sounds good.” he offered you a small smile, happy to see that your attempt at a cold shoulder was somewhat backfiring, knowing that you couldn't avoid him forever. he let the stare linger a bit before turning his attention back to his phone and you quickly snapped back to your notes taken during the class. thanking yourself for not letting the stupid smile heat your cheeks up, now all you had to do was finish the class with a not so uncomfortable silence between the two of you.

the bell didn't take too long to ring before you had to move onto your next class which was the one you detested the most, science. courage surged through you as you waved goodbye to sokka, earning a bright smile back from the boy before you dashed out of the class. to anyone, that might have seemed rather pointless that you felt as proud as you did, a wave goodbye was considered an act of politeness, but that had been the first time you had really addressed sokka in any way since the unplanned confession. he had probably realised that as well, giving a reason for the sudden bright smile on his features.

you practically sprinted towards your science classroom, holding your books tightly to your chest to not let them fly out of your grip. you hoped zuko was already there, knowing he’d want to hear the rather big step you’d just taken in repairing your friendship with your childhood friend. you were surprised that the thought of slowly getting over him in order to just be friends had slipped your mind, remembering that this morning you didn't want anything to have to do with him for the rest of your life, wanting to just stay away from him to not ignite anything in you, but you were slowly realising it was ridiculous to throw away the friendship for your unrequited crush. you two may not be as close as before but you could still stay friends, you could still hangout with him without feeling like your heart was shattering every moment you’d meet his beautiful ocean eyes.

“zuko!” you called for him as soon as you spotted the back of his black haired head, whipping his head around to greet you with a grin, happy that you weren't ignoring him like he thought you might, considering your answers to his texts were rather sporadic and vague.

“happy to see you’re alive y/n.” he joked as soon as you caught up with him, both of you walking at the same height as you entered the room, taking a seat next to each other as you always did, even when the two of you werent as close as you were now.

“i think i’m ready to fully start moving on.” you announced, taking a deep breath before letting him know of your future plans, determination in yours eyes and tone as you felt set to move on from your crush.

“really? i'm surprised it didn't take longer.” his eyes grew a bit at your proclamation, not expecting to hear you say those words this early, thinking he’d have to see you distance yourself from everyone for weeks but it only took a day or two, making him slightly septic at how long you would actually last with your new resolution but nonetheless he was proud of you.

“yeah well i’m kind of stuck with sokka for a history project and i figured might as well start moving on from him. i still want to be friends with him.” you explained, taking your science homework out so you were prepared whenever the teacher would come on in.

“i’m proud of you y/n, its very mature of you.” he placed his hand on your shoulder, sincerity in his tone lifting your spirits up at the thought of repairing whatever damage you might’ve caused and the thought of the damage you were avoiding by taking action now instead of later.

saturday rolled around and you had managed to have some sort of small talk with sokka during your classes, still deciding to spend your lunch period with jin instead of your usual friends but it was a start to where you thought you would be saturday after you left. you had stopped eating with your friends a little over a week ago, opting to spend time with the lovely girl from your math class. you had had trouble sleeping friday night, scared of going to sokka’s house and falling back to where you started, back to square one, back in love with a friend who was already taken by a lovely girl.

your feet felt rather heavy as you walked down the familiar path to his house, bag with a your notebook and history course around your shoulder as you retraced the steps you had followed almost everyday during that particular summer, always going to sokka’s house to entertain yourself while school was out.

you first lingered in the air above the door for a couple of seconds, taking a deeo breath in to calm your nerves before you finally knocked. it didnt take long before it was opened, sokka with an eager smile on his lips was who greeted you behind the door.

“finally, you shouldve been here an hour ago!” he lamented jokingly as he moved out of the way to let you in, causing you to roll your eyes at how dramatic your friend was.

“sokka, im five minutes late.” you deadpanned, hastily taking your shoes off, leaning against a nearby wall for support.

“exactly!” he exclaimed, his voice cracking slightly and suddenly you felt as though nothing ever happened, as if your feelings had never come to make you want to change whatever relationship you had with him, simply feeling as though the two of you were just friends.

“really sokka? dont you reme,ber when i waited an hour for you outside in the freezing cold in the woods so we could make a campfire together? or that time where we were late in eight grade because someone accidentally put on ripped pants? or-”

“alright i get it.” he held his hands up in defeat at your inquisitive look, knowing you were only joking around with him to make him feel slightly guilty for all the times he had been late.

“my dad made seaweed noodles for us to eat while we work, hope thats okay.” shoving his hands in his pockets, waiting to see you reaction at the mention of one of your favorite dishes that he’d always insist his father to make you whenever you’d come by.

“no way!” you dashed into the kitchen, leaving sokka by himself at the entrance, surprised at how fast the two of you had seemed to ease back into things and some part of it seemed to good to be true but he was happy to have you back.

“wait for me!” he called for you, spending slightly to join you. a reminiscent smile on his lips as he watched you excitedly poor yourself a bowl, knowing where everything in the hous ewas from it practically being a second home for you during all those years.

“you’ll have to say thank you to hakoda.” you told him as you eyed the noodles, your stomach rumbling as you brought it to the table, it had been too long since you had eaten his father’s cooking.

“y/n, you havent even eaten it yet, how do you know its good?” he laughed as he watched you carefully bring the bowl to the dinner table, trying to get to it as fast as you could but still making sure to not let any of the broth spill out.

“because your dad’s seaweed noodles are the best!” you defended your previous statements, taking a seat as you waited for sokka to make his own bowl and bring chopsticks for the both of you. the watertribe boy nodded, slightly mocking you in his own playful way. while you waited for him to rejoin you, you took out the notebook you used for your history notes and grabbed a pen that was sitting on the table.

you scribbled down the title of your project and tapped your pen, impatient waiting to be able to dig into your steaming hot dish.

“have any ideas for the presentation?” sokka startled you slightly, coming from behind you to lean over your shoulde to see if you had written anything but he was met with a blank page.

“no, now get me my chopsticks idioy.” you shoved his head away, earning a protestful ‘hey’ from him as your brought your hand back to wram themselvbes on the bowl.

“here.” he placed the chopsticks next to the bowl before making his way around the table to sit in front of you, slowly blowing on his soup to cool it down.

“took you long enough.” you teased before you grabbed them to pick up some of the noodles, cooling them off with your breath before shoving some of it into your mouth. sokka started laughing at how quickly you engulfed the noodles that his father had spent the morning making.

you flipped him off, not caring at how ‘unlady like’ you might’ve looked but it had been forever since you had tasted his father’s seaweed noodles, during winter it was a staple food for whenever you would spend the night but since the weather had gotten warmer and you had grown more distant, it had been a hot minute since you had a traditional dish of the southern water tribe, something you’d most definitely use in your comparison of the different cuisines.

“before we start, i wanted to talk to you about something.” sokka brought his hand down, deciding not to eat just yet but rather address the elephant in the room.

“yeah?” you knew where this was going so you finished chewing what was in your mouth and swallowed, keeping your eyes on the food as you wiated for sokka’s question.

“so where do we stand, us? i mean two days ago you stormed off, after weeks of us not actually talking and now it feels like everything is fine. i just want to make sure that you’re okay.” you took a deep breath in, knowing this was coming, knowing you had to confront your feelings upfront now and not just push whatever you were feeling down, hoping it didnt blow over one day.

“if im being honest sokka, i like you, still, but i want us to be friends. im happy to see that suki makes you happy, but it might take some time for me to get over you so we might not ever be as close as before for my own sake but im willing to try my hardest to fix anything i mightve broken in the last couple of weeks. because i love having you as a friend and no matter how much it wouldve hurt to be with you before, i still missed my best friend.” you slowly lifted your head up, pouring out what was your mind without any filter, letting him know where you stood, sincerity written on your features as you wiated to see sokka’s reaction.

“that sounds good, whatever works for you. just happy i dont have to lose my oldest friend” he finally answered after silence settled between the two of you, letting your words settle and let him process your new confession.

you smiled back and then the two of you turned your attention back to the noodles, the two of you practically inhaling the food as the only sound was the muching of the seaweed and the slurping of the soup. a nice moment shared between two friends.

“you know, theres still girl that i just know you’d like.” sokka was the first to speak up, a small tease in his tone as he tried to set you up right after you told him you were trying to move on from him.

“sokka.” you threatened, not wanting him to go down whatever road he was about go down to, you finding it to be the wrong moment to bring this up.

“i’m just saying i have yue’s number if you want it!” he recoiled on his claim, but made sure to name drop the girl he supposedly thought was perfect for you. blood rushed to your cheeks at the mention of his ex girlfriend from middle school, rmebering how beautiful you thought the white haired girl was and how you had a small crush on her while they were dating.

the boy in front of you simply laughed, feeling content at where he now stood with his friend since kindergarten. he was your dream boy, but maybe not in the way you first thought. he was the boy of your dreams but not all dreams need to be romantic.

general taglist: @draqondance @biqherosix @sunnypluto @butterfly-skinnylegend @staygoldsquatchling02 @yuesallura

atla taglist: @welovediaaxx @ilovespideyyy @missmorosis

sokka taglist: @firelady-jay

[number5theboy]

In a series that has so much to do with time travel, at least currently, i hust dont see how Five cant be the main plot driver? Just based on their powers. I would LOVE to see Allison be the one to do it considering shes my fave, im just stuck trying to think of how, im sure its possible though. And speaking of characters who are too op, i actually think Lila is as well. Considering she seems to already have great control over her powers, that puts her ahead of almost all the siblings and 😬

Oh, I feel you, I also don’t see how Five can just not drive the plot if the entire plot of Season 3 hinges on a fuck-up in the timeline, and Five is the one that knows time-travelling and its repercussions. I do think Allison, once the writers remember her daughter more clearly, would have the best and most clear-cut motivation to want to get back to the original timeline, because in contrast to everyone else, she actually has someone she loves back in the original 2019. Patch is dead in that timeline, Luther had nothing but pain and isolation there, Klaus’ life was a mess and Vanya’s life was not really heading anywhere, and Five didn’t actually have a life to lose in 2019, so she is the only one who actually has something worth fighting for in the original timeline.

Oh yeah, I agree that Lila is way too overpowered too. She is limited to one mirrored power at a time, but having a second Five or Vanya is very much ‘eh’ to me. I do like the theory that’s floating around about how she can only mirror what she is directly given, i.e. what her opponent does, because then her skill level depends on how good the other one is, but still. I do feel there could have been more interesting powers she could have had, I feel like her powers were slapped on in the last episode to have the siblings fight someone that matches them, and even then. She didn’t kill like Vanya did and Five managed to throw her off from a position where she was unable to in their warehouse fight, so the two Hargreeves are still technically more powerful than she is, but still. Also now apparently one can fight Allison’s rumour?? Is it just because Lila’s powers are mirroring and not as strong as the original powers, or is is just lazy writing?? Probably the latter, but I do like the idea that Lila can mirror powers to a high degree, but not to perfection, that the mirrored powers are always a little less than the original. However, the assumption that all of the above is just lazy writing is much more likely, as the writers are hell-bent on making the powers do whatever they want instead of being in any way consistent.

[thatssokatsuki]

Beauty || Katsuki Bakugo x Reader

Beauty and the Beast Chapter 1

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugo x Reader (Although that won’t show up until much much later, so right now? honestly? its just the reader) Summary: Its your first day in school, and you become acquainted with your classmates Warnings: Nothing that I’m aware of?  Word Count: 1,228

Key: n/c - Native Country

A/N: This is,, my first fic that I didn’t use a song outline for.. I hope you guys like it! I’ll update this whenever I release a new chapter! (and again, please dont mind the formatting, I’m still getting used to using tumblr to write ^^;)

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Ch.1 | Ch.2 | Ch.3 | Ch.4 | Ch.5 | Ch.6 | Ch.7 | Ch.8 | Ch.9 | Ch.10

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A New Day, a new school, you might as well go as far to say a new life. Or at least in your eyes it was all new. You were a brand new student, just like everyone else, however you had just moved to Japan with your family a few months before the entrance exams so you knew pretty much no one other than the Monoma Family thanks to your parents being longtime friends with them. You had to admit you missed your friends and the rest of your family, but this was an opportunity at something fresh and new unlike the more boring life you had led in that small n/c town. Your parents have been preparing you for this virtually your whole life, as they themselves went to UA back when they were your age. Its actually where they had met, according to your father. So here you are, at the school of your parents’ dreams, hoping for the best. You got assigned to class 1-A, and your homeroom teacher was Mr. Aizawa. You quickly learned that you didn’t quite fit in with your class, as they had mostly large personalities, whereas you were more quiet and bookish, preferring books to people and socializing in general. 

Your first day was rough, to put it lightly. Mr. Aizawa had made you skip orientation so he can see your quirks through what he called the Quirk Apprehension Test, threatening to expel whoever was last. His sternness shook you to the bone, but you also understood that being a Hero wasn’t just for shits and giggles. You would constantly be putting your life on the line, and be responsible for the lives of everyone else, so if you were unable to handle a few tests, than you by no means would be ready to have the entire country, if not the world, in your hands to protect from those who decide to use their quirks in an.. undignified way. By the end of all the tests, You placed between a girl whose name you would later learn to be Ochaco Ururaka, and a boy named Koji Koda, which only went to show that even though your quirk was strong, you still had a lot to learn in regards to controlling it. By the time lunch had rolled around, you managed to befriend Ururaka, and by extension a boy who you at first thought his name was Deku, but came to realize it was only a nickname that the brash, and well, crude boy had given him when they were kids. They invited you along, and you gladly joined them, which then led to your friendship with the studious boy named Iida. You had originally planned to find a quiet spot to read the book you had brought with you, but ended up being glad that you managed to make at least a few friends. To your surprise, your family friend, Monoma, spotted you from across the cafeteria and decided to join you and your new found friends. 

You managed to both catch up with him, and introduce him to your new friends. At first they seemed to get along perfectly fine, so you had high hopes. Midoriya, the boy you had originally met as Deku, seemed friendly enough. He was quiet, but also really sweet, and you would be lying if you didn’t find his muttering cute. Ururaka was super sweet and upbeat, not as hyper as the girl you came to know as Mina, but definitely had a lot of energy. Within a day she had basically become your best friend, and you, her’s. Iida was kind and well-meaning, but also quite the stickler, but you found that to be an admirable trait. He was determined and clever, and well, quick, both of feet and mind although you could tell he was more of the intellectual type rather than the emotional. Monoma was, well, Monoma. He hasn’t really changed much over the years, but that was okay. You knew there was more to him than he immediately showed to those around him, in fact, you could see that in everyone around you. By the end of the day, you’ve found a wonderful group of friends, found the classmates you would come to dislike, and learned how much further you have to go before you could accomplish your goals. You just wished that the Loud, Angry boy’s antics would let up soon. You weren’t sure how much more you could take of his shouting and his overconfident ego. If you didn’t know better than to not judge someone upon first impressions, you would swear he was a narcissist, although at the rate you weren’t sure if that would be far off from the boy’s true nature. 

Weeks pass, and you’ve established a routine. You’d walk to school with Monoma (having learned he lived relatively close-by), eat lunch with Midoriya, Ururaka, Monoma, Iida, and sometimes a girl named Tsu and a boy named Tokoyami would join. After school, you and your friends would walk to the stations together, and you and Monoma would return home together. It wasn’t much, but it was nice. You even found time between classes to read, and Monoma would watch your back as you would walk to and from school with him to make sure you didn’t get into trouble as you’d walk and read. The boy who you knew to be Bakugo’s antics never ceased, and with your luck, you happened to be stuck sitting right infront of him in almost every class, which meant that everytime he would yell, the noise would practically bounce off your skull in a painful game of headache dodgeball. You typically could handle loud noises, but he was a noise you were never looking forward to hearing. His constant use of the words “extras” and “sidekick” pretty much confirmed your original impression and you couldn’t be more disappointed. You hoped there would be more than just anger and an ego inflated so much it left room for no-one else, but to the dismay of you and your head, well.. At least those who ended up being his friends weren’t so bad. 

Those... friends.. consisted of 3 boys and 1-2 girls. Of the boys, you liked the electric blonde boy the most. He wasn’t the brightest of the group, but he was really sweet and seemed like a lot of fun, plus you couldn’t help but giggle to yourself whenever he would lose control of his quirk and short-circuit himself. On some level, you felt bad for him whenever that happened, but a part of you also wanted to coo at him and squish his cheeks and call him adorable. You never did, of course, but the thought certainly crossed your mind. You also became quite fond of the girl, Mina, and the other girl who would sometimes join named Jiro. Kirishima seemed really cool, but you pretty much kept your distance as far from him as you did the rest of the group,, them being more extroverts, and you and introvert. Sero was the only one you really had spoken too, as sometimes you would spar with him at times. You kept your furthest distance, at least vocally, from Bakugo. Yeah, sure, he was constantly causing a headache, but he had quite the quirk to match his temper.

[wreckofawriter]

Different

Pairing: Teddy Lupin x reader

Word Count: 2,652

Warnings: None.

Request: omg could u pls write me something like a teddy lupin x reader

A/n: Okkk so I dont exscatly love this story but whatever I hope you guys enjoy!

You were different. That was no secret, since the moment you walked on to Platform 9 ¾ everyone had known you were different. No one knew how they knew, they just knew. 

When you walked onto that train surrounded by terrified first years without a fear in the world, Edward Lupin fell in love with you. Of course at 11 years old he had no clue what love was, he just knew you were unique, and he liked it.

Teddy had looked for 20 minutes to find your cabin, and when he did, you merely glanced at him and asked, "What do you want?" 

When he replied explaining how he wanted to sit there you simply shrug your shoulders as he took a seat. 

The next time he and everyone else in that hall realized you were different is when they called you up to be sorted.

McGonagall yelled, "Y/n y/l/n!" And you had skipped up to the hat a sly smirk plastered on your face. You plopped yourself into the seat, still smirking and waited. 

The hat took it's time, 3 and a half minutes to be exact, to put you in a house. Your smirk grew fainter and fainter with every passing second. 

When the hat belted, "Hufflepuff!" And a chorus of cheers erupted from the black and yellow table, Teddy was terrified. The look on your face was that of pure hatred, loathing and fury. Teddy feared for his life. 

You stood up thrust the hat into McGonagall's hand and stomped to the recently cheerful and now confused table. You plop yourself down as far away from anyone as you could. 

Teddy was called up soon afterward and nervously ascended to the hat. He sat down with a bit of a smile and waited. It took a few seconds of muttering before shouting, "Hufflepuff!" 

Teddy was elated as the table erupted with cheers. When he neared the group he changed his hair to bright yellow with black stripes and the cheers grew louder. He smiled wide until his eyes landed on you. 

Your head was down, your y/h/c hair sprawled across the table. You were definitely not cheering with joy. 

Teddy had once again swallowed his fear and sat across from you. The motion caused you to look up meet his hazel eyes. 

You raised both your eyebrows and pressed your lips into a thin line. Teddy broke into a toothy smile, "I'm Teddy." He stuck out his hand.

You rolled your eyes and let your head fall back into the table. Teddy frowned and dropped his hand. He had never been more intrigued by someone in his life, what was your deal?

Now as Teddy watched you entered the potions classroom, your eyes grew brighter and the touch of a smile grazed your lips. He wished to see that smile more often, it made his heart flutter and his knees go weak. 

"Alright." Slughorn said pulling Teddy out of his daze, "Today we are studying the Draught of Living Dead potion." 

"Great, kill me so I can get out of this lesson." Teddy snickered.

"Contrary to popular belief Mr. Lupin," Slughorn glared at the boy, "The Draught of Living Dead potion does not kill you. Does anyone know what it does?"

Many hands shot in the air and Teddy looked down, embarrassed. 

"Ms. Y/l/n?"

"When someone drinks the Draught of Living Death potion, they go into a deep sleep so strong that they appear to be dead," she paused for a moment before adding "hence the name, living dead." 

Teddy scoffed, attempting to ignore the color creeping onto his face. "Wouldn't that still get me out of this lesson?"

"I suppose." Slughorn drawled. "Anyway, we are going to make some today, flip to page 245 to see the recipe and get started."

Teddy began to gather ingredients as his desk mate, Ash Winpicker, found a cauldron. 

As the two went on they had to restart the potion 3 times, not because they didn't know how to do it -in fact both boys were quite bright- but because Teddy preferred his performance as the class clown than doing work and Ash was welcome to help. 

Finally when Teddy turned his head into an Asian Dragon to "collect hair for the potion" Slughorn had had enough.

"Mr. Lupin! You are disrupting the whole class." Slughorn seethed.

"Just doing my job sir." Teddy saluted him throwing the professor a wink.

"Mr. Lupin, please switch spots with Ms. Hetler."

Teddy groaned snatching his stuff turning around to see Monica Helter taking his spot. He walked towards the front and nearly choked on his saliva when he saw his new seat.

There you were, you y/e/c glaring him down. 

"Hey y/n." He choked out.

"Lupin." You growled, lips pursed. 

Teddy sat down mentally cursing himself.

After a few seconds of silence Teddy cleared his throat. 

"Don't we have to, you know, make the potion?" Teddy asked gesturing to the cauldron.

You let out a snort, "Well you see, when you actually do work, you tend to finish the potion." 

His eyes went wide, "You're already done?" 

"Yep." You said making the 'p' pop on your lips. 

"H-how?" The young boy stuttered out.

"Well, you see it's called working," you smiled sarcastically, "you should try it some time." 

Teddy blushed, his hair flashing crimson before returning to the sapphire blue he had adopted over the past few years.

He glanced at the potion to notice the continents looked exactly as described in the book; it was a light lilac color and the consistency of water.

Teddy let his eyes fall back onto you. You had your head bowed over, your y/h/l y/h/c hanging in your face as your y/e/c eyes were glued to the glowing screen held in your hands.

Smirking, Teddy leaned over and tapped you on the shoulder, "Hey Y/n." 

"What." You snapped lifting your head to greet his hazel eyes.

"I don't think phones are allowed."  The Hufflepuff smiled raising an eyebrow. 

"And I don't think I care." You hissed back.

The boy was about to throw another snide remark when he saw Slughorn out of the corner of his eye. 

Teddy promptly snatched your phone from your hand ignoring your protests.

"Mr. Lupin, do you have a phone out in class?" Slughorn bellowed noticing the small device.

"Ummm yes professor sorry." Teddy said looking up at the teacher apologetically.

"You know that is a violation of school rules," the frustrated professor said snatching the device from his hands, "You can get this back when you see me in detention at then of this week and I will be expecting to see you every night until then." 

"Yes professor." Teddy mumbled.

"Also 15 points from Hufflepuff." 

Every Hufflepuff in the room groaned, well not every. During this whole conversation you sat there wide eyed mouth agape as you watched Teddy Lupin take the fall for you. 

When the conversation ended you stared at the boy so confused and surprised you couldn't get yourself to do anything but stare.

Teddy looked back at you blushing a bit and biting his lip.

Finally you managed to speak, "W-why?" 

"What?" Teddy asked glancing at you again.

You cleared your throat and blinked a few times. "Why did you do that?" 

"Wouldn't want to ruin your Ms. Perfect reputation would we?" Teddy mocked.

"Please no one thinks of me as 'ms. perfect'" You scoffed.

"Slughorn does" he shrugged.

You exhaled loudly and tried to forget about it. He was just, being compulsively nice for some reason. After all he was a true Hufflepuff.

For the next week you attempted to get Edward Lupin out of your head. Unfortunately the stubborn bastard refused to move. He was cemented into your brain like your frontal lobe was branded with an image of him in a hot iron. 

Questions floated in your head. Why save you from punishment and humiliation? What had you ever done except ignore and scoff at the boy to make him take a weeks worth of detention for you? You did your best to ignore such thoughts but they seemed to leak into your head like a cracked boat leaking water; it was a slow process but if not attended to, you would drown. 

You had always found Teddy to be a strange person, I mean besides the whole  metamorphmagus thing. He was always nice and kind, to almost everyone. But here was the real thing that got to you. He was always nice and kind to you. Ever since that day when he shyly walked into your train compartment and the two of you sat in silence the whole ride, the day you got placed in the one house you never thought you would be, and never wanted to be, when the black and yellow haired boy had returned and tried to be your friend once again. 

You had never done anything for him and he seemed to constantly be helping you. He would somehow always be there with candy when you were stressed studying for N.E.W.Ts even though you would just scoff at his jokes he told in attempts to relax you. He was there when you lost your quidditch game and you had felt like crying, you had felt so vulnerable you had smacked the boy in the face with your broom and ran. He was there when you got rejected by Thomas Dunston and when you were dumped by Alex Gelman. He seemed to always be there and you always brushed it off. 

For the longest time you were sure it was simply pity, but now you knew it wasn't so. Because when you looked into the boy's eyes just after he snatched the phone from your hands there was no pity in them. There was this new yet not so new glint of an emotion you couldn't quite place.

Now as you stared down at your plate of food there was Teddy again. Your eyes lifted to meet him. 

"Heres your phone." Teddy winked, leaning over the table to hand you the device.

"Thanks?" You inquired, uncertain about the wink. 

"My numbers in it, you should give me a call some time." He winked again.

You let out a breathy laugh suddenly coming to a realization, "Hold up, are you flirting with me?" 

Teddy burst out laughing, you sat there quite confused. You waited as his laughter turned to giggles and then finally tapered off. Finally he spoke, "Godric, for being so bright you are really stupid." He giggled. 

You blushed hoping he wouldn't notice the slight tinge on your cheeks.

He laughed again, " Merlin y/n, I have been flirting with since I was 11 years old."

"W-what?" 

"Yeah, I've been trying to get your attention for six years. Nice of you to finally notice." Teddy then stood up and began to walk away. 

"Wait!" You yelled standing Teddy stopped just outside of the hall and you ran to meet him. You stopped in front of him. "Why didn't you say something?" 

"I did say something!" Teddy said exasperated. 

"No you didn't!" You fought back.

"Are you kidding?! I complimented you daily. I always tried to sit next to you in classes and during meals, I always study with you even though you ignore me. I make sure that I draw attention to myself in class, just to get you to look my way, when I go to hogsmeade I never leave without acid pops even though I hate the things because I know you love them, I always sit across from you in the library because you make cute little faces at your book and homework!" Teddy bellowed his voice raising with each word. 

"Well I just thought you pitied me!" You howled, anger flowing through you.

"Pitied you?! Y/n I have been in love with you since I saw you step onto that Platform six years ago!" 

Your eyes went from glaring slits to wide with surprise. "Y-you love me?" You choked out.

"Shit." Teddy mumbled burying his face in his hands. His hair was a soft lavender now turning a midnight blue. "Look it's just…" he groaned in frustration, "You have always been different to me, the way you do everything is unique and amazing. You have always been this mystery I have been trying to figure out and..." He sighed, letting his sentence die.

You stood there eyes wide in almost a daze, how could he possibly love you, you were the Hufflepuff mistake, the only mean Hufflepuff, the girl who was put in the wrong house and he was the Hufflepuff prince, the one who belonged, the funniest one, the one who was always destined to be, it wasn't right.

"Look I'm just going to go." 

"Wait Teddy," you grabbed his shoulder then paused looking up at the boy, unsure of what to say. "I act so.. different because, well I was sure of what was going to happen." You took a step closer to his confused state. "I was sure I was going to get on that train ride to Hogwarts where I would get sorted into Slytherin and make some shitty friends who were shitty to other people then I would focus on my grades become a prefect and graduate in the top 10% of my class, just like my parents did and I wouldn't be different at all." You took another step closer, "All of that changed the second that you stepped into my carriage. I suddenly wanted to be your friend and I knew you weren't going to be a shitty one. So I silently hoped to be put in a different house so you wouldn't hate me. Then when I got sorted into one house I knew I could never fit into, everything went to shit, my parents were pissed at me when I just wanted them to be proud and I guess I sort of.. I don't know, blamed it on you." 

Now Teddy was the surprised one. "Oh." 

"Yeah oh." You shrugged. "I am really sorry for blowing you off all those years I just…" you let your voice trailed off when Teddy took another step closer to you. 

"So you don't hate me?" He asked his voice soft.

"Well no, I don't think I've ever really hated you." You whispered heart thumping as you bite your lip looking up at the hazel eyed boy. 

"Good, then I can do this." Teddy smirked.

"Do wh-" you were cut off by his lips. 

Your eyes widened in surprise then closed as you melted quickly into his kiss, moving slowly against his desperate lips. Your heart felt like it was punching out of your chest,  your knees went weak. You wrapped your hands around his neck pulling him impossibly closer as he poked his tongue between your lips. 

When you pulled away panting his hair was a hot pink to match your cheeks. 

"Woah." You whispered, eyes wide, lips swollen. 

Teddy's smile grew on his pink lips as he let out a breathy laugh, "Yeah woah." He giggled. 

You smiled biting your bottom lip missing his own.

"So you'll go to hogsmeade with me this weekend?" The Hufflepuff asked.

"Of course." You answered reaching up and bringing your fingers through his hot pink hair. "See you then."

"Great!" Teddy said smiling wider than he was sure he ever had.

You giggled turning away from the overly enthusiastic boy.

Teddy watched as you retreated from him. The second you were out of view he leapt in the air whooping and pumping his fist, little did he know you were around the corner hand tracing your own lips  as you leaned against the corridor wall smiling just as wide.

[imaginedisish]

Let It Be (Crowley x Reader) Good Omens

A/N: OOOOHHH MY GOD HEY GUYS SO IM OFFICIALLY BACK!!!! I’m a little bit rusty, so this first imagine is probably going to be a little bad. BUT!!! IM BACK. OMFG IM SO HAPPY AHHHH!!! So this imagine is half based on a request about Crowley and the reader starting out as friends, and then beginning to date, and half just something I needed to write. Life has been hard, but writing this helped. The title, and some parts of the imagine are based on Let It Be by The Beatles. I hope you guys enjoy!!! Keep requesting!!! AHHH!!! IM SO EXCITED TO BE BACK YOU HAVE NO IDEA. ENJOY! (P.s I will write for our ineffable husbands...pls just request)

Summary: Crowley comforts the reader after the reader receives devastating news. Crowley takes the opportunity to reveal a secret he’s been keeping for a long time. (College au)

Warnings: Language, depressive thoughts, depression, mental breakdown, some angst, overall sadness, mentioned and implied death of loved one(s). OH AND FLUFF AS ALWAYS ITS FLUFFY DONT WORRY.

Word Count: 1,964

When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me

Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me

Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

You anxiously shuffle around your apartment as Let It Be by the Beatles plays from the record player in your dining room. The wood floors underneath your feet are cold and unwelcoming; a sharp chill rolls down your spine. The city lights glare through your window as the sound from the streets below boom throughout your apartment. Tears begin to fill your eyes, making everything around you a blurry mess. At this point, it had all become far too much for you to handle. 

This year had been a terrible one. You felt as though you were consistently losing everyone around you. It lead you to question whether or not anything had a purpose anymore. Everything had been out of your control for so long, that it seemed as though things could never go back to normal. You were waiting for that light at the end of the tunnel, but it was nowhere to be seen. 

The final straw, unfortunately, was the passing of your aunt. The worst part of it all was how far you were from your family. You were a junior attending NYU, and the semester was about to end. All you had to do was take finals, and you were free for the summer. Then, suddenly, your mother called you with the news. You felt numb, useless, and purposeless. Life seemed so dark, so short, so impossible. 

What am I supposed to do now? You think to yourself. What’s the point of all this? You begin to sob uncontrollably. You know your neighbors can hear you through your walls, but you don’t care anymore. It was all too much for you to deal with. 

Suddenly, you hear a familiar voice, dragging you away from your dark thoughts. “Hello? (Y/N)?”, the voice calls, followed by a knock at the door. You stand up, trembling as you walk towards the door. 

“Crowley? I-Is that y-you?” You stutter, sniffling as you try your best to be loud enough to be heard through the door. You wanted it to be him with everything in you. Crowley had been there for you since the beginning of college. Through thick and thin, he stood by your side. 

You two had met in Central Park in September of your freshman year, and coincidentally realized you both were students at NYU. Something drew you together, and you two had been close ever since. Aside from your tastes in music, you and Crowley were polar opposites. He was tough, and had a sort of “bad boy” exterior. You on the other hand, were soft and kind. You were an English Major, and Crowley was a Chem Major. You were like an angel, and he was much more like a demon. In many ways, you two balanced each other out. 

What Crowley was completely unaware of, however, were your feelings for him. Practically from the day you met him, you knew Crowley was going to be an important part of your life. 

You knew you were going to fall in love with him. 

“Yes, of course it’s me. Now let me in,” Crowley commands. Without hesitating, you swing the door open. 

There was Crowley, his red hair spiked up, his black, circular sunglasses resting on the bridge of his nose. 

Crowley removes his sunglasses from his face, something he rarely did. He looks you up and down, quickly recognizing that something was wrong. He noticed the red blotchiness of your face, and how tangled your hair was.

He looks down at your hands, which are shaking uncontrollably at your side. A concerned look appears on Crowley’s face. He steps inside quickly, and slams the door behind him. 

You instantaneously feel his arms wrap around your body, pulling you tightly into his chest. “I don’t know what happened, love, but I’m here,” Crowley whispers in your ear, shocking you a bit. He was normally much tougher than this. Seeing this side of him was different. It was far from the Crowley you had come to know. 

“Whatever you need, I’m here. I’m not going anywhere,” Crowley says as you grip onto his shoulders, and dig your face into his chest. 

You two stay like that for a bit, until you calm down enough to separate from him. Crowley brings a hand to your face, softly wiping away your tears with his thumb. You sniffle softly, waiting for Crowley to ask for more information. 

He opens his mouth. “So, do I get to know what happened?” There it was, the question you were dreading. 

“M-my…” You trail off, unable to finish your sentence. Crowley grabs your hands, holding them in his own. 

“You can tell me, love. I’m here,” His yellow eyes meet yours as they beg for some sort of a response. It’s clear his intensions are good. It’s clear all he wants to do is help. This was so out of character for Crowley. He was never like this. 

“My aunt died, C-Crowley,” You struggle to say as your stare travels from Crowley’s eyes to the floor below you. 

You can feel Crowley’s grip on your hands grow tighter. “I’m so sorry love,” Crowley says, stepping closer to you. “What do you want me to do?” He asks, his hands refusing to let go of yours. 

“J-just stay with me, please,” You whisper.

“Of course, (Y/N),” Crowley says, pulling you back into his arms. You press your face against his chest as his cologne fills the air around you. He smells like vanilla and cigarettes. The two scents somehow balance each other out. “Is there anything else I can do to help?” He asks. 

“N-nothing, Crowley. There isn’t anything anyone can do,” You manage to say. “Honestly I don’t even know what to do anymore,” You pause, catching your breath. “School is so fucking hard. I really don’t think I can do this anymore. It feels like absolute hell. I keep losing people, and I’m so sick of it. I can’t fucking do this anymore. I mean it.” 

Crowley lets go of your hands. “Well, you aren’t going to lose me.” He steps even closer now, his nose just inches away from your face. “And you can count on that, alright?” 

You’re taken back by his words yet again. Crowley wasn’t one for emotions like this.

Regardless, you nod your head in response. “Alright.”  More than anything else at this point, you feel confused. Crowley has never acted like this before. It was a side of him you had never seen. Of course, over the years, he had obviously helped you through things. However, it was never like this. It was usually tough love, or advice; never the “mushy” stuff. 

He walks further into your apartment now, finding his way to the kitchen. He opens your fridge, and takes out a dark, red apple. He opens one of your drawers and finds a knife, and he proceeds to cut the apple up. 

You look at him, confusion clearly written all over your face. “What? You need eat something. Go sit down while I get this ready. I’ll make you some tea too,” Crowley says softly. 

You’re even more confused than before. “This just…” You don’t even know what to say anymore. “This isn’t like you, Crowley,” You say, a slight smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. 

“What do you mean, love?” Crowley asks, busy at work in the kitchen. “Am I not allowed to take care of you?” 

Your smile grows bigger. “No, it’s just not like you to be…well…”

Crowley finishes your sentence. “Caring? Loving?” He giggles a bit. “Well, it’s you, so it’s different.”

Different? You think to yourself. 

“What about me is different?” You can’t help but ask, making your way into the kitchen now. 

“Everything,” Crowley says, his eyes stuck on the apple he was cutting. “That was actually the reason why I came by, tonight (Y/N). There’s something I need to tell you.” Your heart jumps into your throat. Crowley had never been this vulnerable with you. 

Your mind is racing with thoughts. Could this actually be happening right now? Could Crowley actually have…no, no way. Crowley will never feel for me the way I feel about him, You think.  

“What do you need to tell me?” You ask, stepping closer to Crowley. He puts the knife down, and takes a deep breath. He seems stressed, uneasy. 

“Never mind. Now isn’t the right time. You’re going through so much right now, and I really don’t want to add more stress unto you,” Crowley says, shaking his head and picking up the knife again. 

You take another step towards him. “You could never add more stress to me, Crowley. So, tell me what’s on your mind.” 

Crowley puts the knife down a second time, and closes his eyes. “I, well…you see I…” he trails off, opening his eyes, staring deeply into your own. “I don’t know how to say this.”

“Just say it, Crowley.” 

“I’m not good with all this ‘feelings’ bullshit. I’ve already done far more emotionally in the past five minutes than I have in my entire life. Can’t I just get a free pass? Save this whole speech for another day?” Crowley groans, stepping away from the counter. 

“Speech?” You ask. “What speech?”

“Nothing,” Crowley says, crossing his arms across his chest. 

“Oh come on. Just tell me Crowley!” You beg. 

Crowley says nothing. 

“Say it already. How hard can it be to-,”

“I’m in love with you,” Crowley blurts out. 

“I-,I…” You’re at a loss for words. You had been waiting for Crowley to say that for three years, and you were convinced it was never going to happen. 

“I knew I was going to fall in love with you that day in the park,” Crowley says, his yellow, golden eyes searching yours frantically. He brings a hand up to comb through his red hair. “Every day from there on out was better because of you.” He pauses, collecting his thoughts. “I know you don’t feel the same, but I just had to get this out of my system. I love you, (Y/N), and I have for quite some time. I just couldn’t keep ignoring it. I couldn’t just let it be anymore.” 

“Crowley, I-,”

“I’ll go now. I’m so terribly sorry for this,” Crowley says, making his way towards the door. 

“Crowley wait!” You say, following after him. “I love you too,” He stops in his tracks, and whips around to face you. 

“Y-you love me too?” Crowley asks in disbelief. 

“Yes, of course I do, Crowley.” You say. “I’ve loved you from the very beginning.” He stares at you, dumbfounded. 

“Are you serious right now?” He asks. 

You roll your eyes. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

He takes a few steps closer to you.  

He cups your right cheek with his hand. “Then I’m sorry I’ve waited so long to do this,” Crowley says. Suddenly, his lips come crashing down on yours. 

His lips are soft and warm. The moment fills you with the sense of purpose you once thought was lost. 

Crowley pulls his lips apart from yours. 

“Better late than never,” You say, a smile spreading across your face. 

And when the broken-hearted people living in the world agree

There will be an answer, let it be

For though they may be parted, there is still a chance that they will see

There will be an answer, let it be

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 19

IN THIS EPISODE OF MURPHY IS SCREAMING, CONSTANTLY, TRAPPED IN THEIR PERFECT NIGHTMARE:

Glynda was saying: “I know we aren’t friends. I know we aren’t partners. I know you’re a criminal. But—I think I can trust you. I think I have to trust you, even if you’ve done awful things before.”

EVERYTHING GOES WRONG BUT LIKE SOMEHOW WORSE THAN EVER? LIKE A WHOLE NEW BRAND OF LOW. LIKE CINDER’S GOT A PICKAXE AND THE CENTRE OF THE PLANET CALLS FOR AID.

IT’S BEEN A WHILE HUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but dw offal hunt, like the rising of the sun, the arrival of winter, and the eventual downfall of capitalism, always returns. so lets go.

(i just quickly reread chapter 18 liveblog to remember what happened and Ah Yes I Remember Now. The Suppressed Memories)

The place was emptier without Glynda. Quieter.

/gunshot oh we’re in danger right out of the gate huh? we got some yearning right out here? right now? how quickly the turn do tables.

Cinder appraised her work, holding the beige coat up to the light and squinting.

man i forgot. i FORGET. how much i just love cinder in this fic. sometimes she kinda zones to the back of my mind where she sits waiting for me to start thinking about her again, but now i remember that this cinder is Peaque. look at her GO, minding her own BUSINESS. im proud of her. does she know i love her.

It didn’t take long to don her new, fire-proofed clothes.

in another world, in a more comical plot, she used asbestos. it didnt go well.

The subtle warmth of the Dust teased tension from Cinder’s stiff muscles, even as she marvelled at the strangeness of her own bedroom’s space. It seemed bigger now than it had the last two nights.

h

She chose not to dwell on it.

h

i choose to dwell on it! ME!!!! I CHOOSE TO DWELL ON IT. HEY CINDER WHAT THIS GAY SHIT. hello. ma’am. can we look deeper into this. i, for one, would like to, and i, for one, think its of value to think abt this. that said, small segue

Quietly, Cinder murmured, “I didn’t freak out.”

THE FACT SHE SAYS IT ALOUD LIKE EM AND MERC CAN HEEEEEEAR HEEEEEEEER i am. INFATUATED with this family. cant wait for the 100k spinoff thats basically an elongated beach episode where they go to like. alton towers. or butlins. six flags??? thats a thing in america right??? anyway. beach episode. call me. (wink wink nudge nudge push push shove shove)

 We had to stop back in because Merc left his favorite binder, and it was 2 in the morning, so it was easier to crash here for the night than mess with the ship’s autopilot.

them,,, THEM!!!! mercury is just a son and childe. thast it. he canot change this. i love these kids so much i am SHAKING THE MONITOR RN!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAA

Stuck here in one of the homes they’d shared, Cinder missed them terribly. Missed the sound of their voices and the easy comfort of their presence. Finding the time to contact them had been difficult, between managing Glynda and Hati both, but Glynda was gone, and she’d sent Hati onwards to Atlas. She remembered her call with Emerald, before arriving in Umbraroot; she knew it had not soothed her or her fears.

im sorry was this chapter targeted at me, specifically, as a human being on planet earth? GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THIS FAMILY!!!!!!!!! THIS WONKY OLD BANDAGED UP FAMILY UNIT!!!!!!!!!!!!! i thrive every time they are mentioned on the page. it is a blessing. my succulents grow stronger each time they show up.

“No,” Cinder argued softly, “I had to. Mercury, you deserve to hear it from me as well. I am sorry. And I am promising you: I’ll come back.”

For a long, heart-wrenching moment, he was completely quiet. It was good that Cinder was alone in the apartment; laying herself bare like this would be unbearable with an audience.

GODDDDDDDDDDD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

i am OBSESSED WITH THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM GOING TO BE THINKING ABOUT THIS UNTIL I D I E. of all thing the remaster does better than og, this is just. SPEEDING AHEAD. this whole CONFLICT this whole MESS just makes everything so much RICHER its like when u splash some wine in yr fancy food or stick some cinnamon on yr favourite desserts u dont NEED TO but it adds that lil SOMETHING,,, that little KICK that just ties the flavour profile together and in this case ofgughugguhu it just GIVES SO MUCH. im making SNOW ANGELS in the WORDS on the PAGE.

“Mercury. If I could prove it to you, I would. But you have to—trust me. For just a while longer.”

“It’s getting harder,” he said. He didn’t sound like he was lying just to hurt her. That wasn’t spite. That was honest anger. And it made her feel like dirt.

im less picking these for specific instances of like, things i want to say, but more just because bits of this r rly just so /chef kiss. cinder has these.... endearingly (take that whichever way u like) human qualities in OG to rly make u realise she had ties to add to her #Doubt but the remaster is just AMPING it up and u FEEL IT and ive never been more SYMPATHETIC to a round-faced sinnamon bun of assholery and fire id DIE for cinder fall and this is a fact PUT IT ON MY GRAVESTONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Is there anything you need?” What was this? Cinder could barely focus on her words. It felt like... “Anything? At all?”

“We’re fine.”

“Mercury, wait please—” She was losing him. “I think—”

“Just hurry up.”

The line went dead.

this place is not a place of honor.................. no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here........................ nothing valued is here................ IM DYING

Cinder began to type out her response, and that was when the nausea really kicked in. 

[...] 

She recognized this now.

Glynda.

stress stress stress stress STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

There shouldn’t be anybody. Cinder had done everything in her power to cut Glynda from people who would interfere. To isolate her. Make it easier to bring her to Atlas, to the frozen north, to her mother and the machine…

Cinder’s esophagus quivered; furiously, she shut her eyes and thought of nothing.

god cinder don’t remind me that you’re an asshole and dipshit and also a moron im trying to be NICE and CARE ABT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STOP REMINDING ME YOU’RE A PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

FOR FIVE MINUTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The front door clicked open.

Cinder couldn’t have said how much time had passed, only that it had passed slowly. What she did know was that it was Glynda returning, the sensation of boils bursting wafting off her soul. It crawled over Cinder’s flesh. She curled in on herself.

There were mites under every nailbed. Salt in her weeping mouth.

offal hunt’s brilliant use of this horror aspect is something i have tried previously to emulate and here’s a fact, take it from me: that shit is HARD. offal hunt consistently able to whack those real nasty, really Disgusting vibes on the head EVERY TIME is a work of art. i mean, kc and diesel do not fuck around, and therefore i am NOT surprised, but it’s only when u try this shit yourself that you realise: this is hard! this is difficult! it’s a huge testament to how GOOD this fic is in every way. also this whole fucking body horror aspect is something i didnt know this fic needed, but it did, and here we are. 

Thickly: “Things were going okay. If you hadn’t gotten nasty, I might have smoothed things over. I could have fixed things with my son.”

with my son

with my son

with my son

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I CANT TAKE IT EVERY TIME ITS TOO MUCH FOR TO BEAR I CANNOT HANDLE IT I CANNOT STAND IT ITS LIKE BEING SHOT JUST DIRECTLY IN MY DICK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

im like sweating rn

Glynda said, “I’m scared.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want to tell you.”

I SAID IM SWEATING

Glynda asked, “Are you lying to me?”

And Cinder said, “What?”

“About me. About Witches. About Ozpin—” Cinder’s guts went sour. “—About anything. I need to know if I can trust you.”

I SAID I! AM! S W E A T I N G

“I know you’ve lied to people. Hurt people.”

Adrenaline and the image of her kids’ faces behind her eyes made a potent, sick cocktail. “—Not. Now.”

so lets like double back to when i said hey was this chapter written to target me specifically and as it turns out, yes. yes it was. yes it was and as MUCH AS I AM LIVING FOR THIS MOMENT THIS SWEET BUILDUP THE EXPLOSION AND THE CRATER IT ALL LEAVES BEHIND

I

AM

so this next bit is like. i cant really quote one section but as i was saying in Vague DMs, this whole bit feels like wading through mud. usually if you say something consumes energy to Read it’s in a Bad Way when yr bored but this is more like. you Feel cinder all over everything feels so sluggish and it’s like dragging your own corpse around as you try and leave and you’re TIRED and your LEGS HURT and you’re kinda thinking god what if i just fell face down for just a moment of my LIFE.

The putrid weight of Glynda’s soul filled the room until there was no space left for her.

it’s like being trapped in a sauna, like getting stuck in a humid waiting room. where do you GO. what do you DO. god this whole section is fantastic and offal hunt NEVER fails to fucking nail the Vibes but reading it is HARD. i literally keep having to stop and breathe like ive been holding my breath. jesus h christ.

a small intermission for a mood:

“Get fucked.”

back to regularly scheduled hell

Out of the bedroom. Down the hall. The walls were sweating with heat. She tasted smoke. 

i love that i just said how i feel like im trapped in a sauna and it turns out: thats because me and cinder both, baybee!!!! hahahaha help

Glynda’s soul chewed her to the marrow. “Move, Glynda.” 

cinder being hunted at the start of this fic: teehee! im running away! now im gonna getcha! heehee! arent i clever :) cinder being hunted now: this uh. this blows, actually,

Cinder’s pulse roared in her ears. Her hands twitched. She smelled Ochre Brown’s round face melting off. His wide smile shattered with each of his teeth, going black and popping like corn.

this chapter is probably my favourite so far for this blending of so many elements. i cant even begin to like. THINK STRAIGHT about how all of this is tying together. the lore. the THEMATICS. like i said this character rly is just Rich with what og lacked and oh is it RICH. im gonna read this chapter in future and see so much that i know ive already missed. holy shit.

“Ms. Fall,” she said. “The White Fang requires your presence immediately.”

NOT NOW

Cinder stood there looking at it for a moment. Her thoughts were slow. Copper-tinged. Something small and indulgent whispered to her through the blood-fog.

It was obvious enough what would happen if she got into this car. The driver would take her to a secluded place, where she would be ambushed by a squadron of battle-hungry White Fang grunts.

They’d try to take her down. And she was a killer, wasn’t she? Ochre Brown wailed in her ears with every thump of her runaway heart. Her hands itched for action; her teeth, for blood.

She’d burn them black.

never mind! you are already dead,

She thought about Glynda. About her saying that if there was trouble with the Fang, she wanted to come. That she would fight for Cinder.

She thought of Glynda’s question: What aren’t you telling me about Ochre Brown?

Yeah, fuck that.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A MOMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!! MORE MOMENTOUSLY: WHAT A CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this is EASILY my favourite chapter so far. EASILY. everything about this was peak offal. the relationships. the dynamics. the dialogue. the vibes. the Grossness. the fighting. the EVERYTHING. this is some other level and its BITCHIN. PEAK. that said im now very tired. im going to have a cup of tea and Consider Things for a few hours. brb.

[fairycosmos]

I have my finale exam tomorrow and I'm 99,9% sure that I'll fail. I feel like such a failure right now. I could retake the school year but why I understand the school work then, if I don't understand it now. I'll probably stay unemployed forever, because I'm so anxious at job interviews and I literally don't know how to talk to people. Maybe it'd be the best if I didn't exist because nothing would change if wasn't here anyway. I wouldn't be missed and I know I will never be happy anyway.

hey dude, listen. it sounds a bit like you’re spiraling right now and i really think it’d do you some good to just take a step back and breathe. i hope the test went okay, and by okay i hope i mean you got through it, because that’s literally all you can ask of yourself. it’s natural to be nervous about such things and if you’re also struggling with mental illness on top of that, it’s easy to get lost in the heaviness of that anxiety. making big unfounded assumptions about your future, feeling a sense of doom, thinking in black and whites instead of recognizing the nuance and middle ground - all of those are red flags, not reliable thought processes that you need to build your life around. it’s okay to process negative emotions, to be upset and to feel overwhelmed and to want to give up at at times. we all need to break down a little when we’re overwhelmed so we can let some of that pent up tension out. but that should look like allowing yourself to cry, reaching out to those around you, getting some rest, and removing yourself from situations that exacerbate the pain when possible. not harming yourself in hopes of dulling those emotions, because that’s how you get stuck in a cycle of self destruction that is more suffocating than just confronting the pain and trying to let it go. look, you’re young and life is generally a lot longer than it seems when you’re in school, in the sense that we learn how resilient we are over and over again. we’re supposed to ‘mess up.’ things go ‘wrong ’and then we carve our paths out of that, and we adapt. whether we realize it or not. you’ve done it before, and you can do it again. if it turns out you have to retake the school year, then with the extra time and maybe additional support from your teachers, the school work may become a little clearer if you give it the chance and try out new learning techniques to find what works for you. that doesn’t make you a failure at all. you clearly care a lot about your future, and you’ve already made so much more progress than you realize. i know it doesn’t seem like it in this moment. but seriously, whatever happens, after the initial disappointment and frustration, you WILL be able to return to a sense of normality. the extent of how much it hurts right now is not permanent. there’s truly no set time schedule for education, no matter how much they want to convince us otherwise. you just have to do what you can with what you’ve been given. that’s more than good enough. you’re more than good enough. and about job interviews - try to slow down. there’s absolutely no evidence that you will be unemployed forever, in fact it’s very unlikely, and your worth/future happiness doesn’t rely on that factor anyway. honestly, i’ve been to a few job interviews by now and i’ve always thought the same thing about myself. especially when i was in school, i thought i knew, that there was no way i could handle it, no way anyone would take me on. and they are uncomfortable and nerve wracking, sure. but they’re also not the beginning and end of the world. nobody is expecting you to be the worlds best talker especially when you’re new to the whole thing. it’s about showing your enthusiasm and your skillset, and if you dont believe you have one, you do. you just cant see it because you dont like yourself right now. i’ve been rejected from jobs too, and yeah it’s a dig at the self esteem, but it’s not a personal failure. it’s just the nature of applying for a position that loads of other people are also applying for. you learn to accept it. but you don’t even have to carry that weight yet, love. so try to recognize what your brain is doing by bombarding you with worries that are entirely out of your control, and that there is no actual proof of. more than anything, it’s important to remember that school nor your career defines everything that you are. we’re taught from a young age that we only deserve to be here if we’re ‘useful’ by capitalist standards, if we can justify the space we take up. but it’s a fucking lieeeeee. raising us like that is the only way to get us to work work work without questioning it too much. it’s got nothing to do with you and everything to do with the world being a soul sucking machine. so, relax. you deserve to be here and you deserve to be gentle with yourself, nothing changes that. not tests or the future or your self hatred. i know it’s hard to believe that such concepts apply to you, but they do. nothing and nobody would be better off without you, i promise. when you’re in a dark place it’s only normal to believe that you’ll never be happy, but it’s really not the case in reality. happiness is an emotion that comes and goes like all else, and it is entirely possible for it to become a consistent theme in your life. that is, if you’re able to make it through this part. if you’re able to try to engage in healthier coping mechanisms so that you see your situation from multiple perspectives, rather than just from a one dimensional ‘things will never get better’ stand point. even if you just have to survive hour by hour, until you get there.

i’d really recommend considering talking to someone about what’s happening in your head right now, man. i know that’s not what you want to hear and part of you will want to immediately write it off, but try to pause and keep it in the back of your mind. whether it’s a teacher, a parent/family member, a school counselor, a mental health hotline, a friend, your doctor - there are so many people out there who have the tools to help you learn to manage. and it doesn’t matter if the process is slow or non linear, or if you have to force the words out. all that matters is that you try. whatever that means to you, even if some days it’s just staying in your room and breathing through it. you can recognize that not wanting to be here any more is an unhealthy thought, indicating that there is a lot more going on beneath the surface, yeah? it’s alright to talk about that and to let others in. our mental health is often just as fragile as our physical health and sometimes it needs medical intervention in order to be adequately supported, and that’s totally fine.  yeah, opening up is embarrassing and yeah it’s not something anyone ‘wants’ to do, but it’s often very necessary, because it’ll allows people to be able to relate with and guide you. please consider your own needs and know that there is no shame in speaking up. even if you have to take some time to find the courage. honestly, you don’t even need to go into great detail. a simple ‘i need help and i’m not sure what to do’ is a great place to start with someone you trust, or someone who is in a position to help you. anyway, i’m sorry this got super long. navigating school is fuckin difficult at the best of times, and i’m infinitely proud of you for making it to this point and for being able to articulate your feelings like this to me. i have no doubt that you will be able to get through this if you give yourself the time and the tools do so. and i dont say that lightly at all. try to ground yourself for now, and start again tomorrow. if you want to talk about this properly or if you ever need a friend, my dms/inbox will be open. take care. focus on one day at a time.

[tartagilicious]

Hi, I don't know if you write IkeVamp requests or not, but if you do, would you consider an Arthur X Reader where the MC is a big fan of the Sherlock series (Specifically A study in scarlet, and The sign or four)? You dont have to though

*the detail about sadness lurking in his gaze is from Arthur’s route teaser, where Theo mentioned that while Arthur enjoyed writing, halting his progress in becoming a doctor just to continue the series due to the outcry of fans ruined him. His last books were quite literally churned out of nothing, and he wasn’t happy writing them. or, in Theo’s words, he was just stuck in a cycle of insecurity and doubt, and essentially that broke him down to what he presents today.

Happy Arthur release day~

— 

[10:53PM] When the frivolous man at the dining table introduced himself as Arthur Conan Doyle, I had a hard time holding back a scoff. I lived hundreds of years after the author had made his debut with the iconic series known worldwide, but even in my day, the man was known to be just as great as the stories he wrote. So I thought it was quite obvious why I was reluctant to see the man that had tried to bite me, vexingly mocking my helplessness all the while, as the same author I’d been idolising for years.

It was easier to believe that the one sitting next to me with a sword around his belt and a thick Parisian accent was in fact Napoleon, no matter how unfathomable the idea was. Above all, he had tried to help me, so the least I could do was believe he was who he said he was. But Arthur, on the other hand, while he sported the same crude and unusual humour as the real author had been recorded to have, he was far too much of a flirtatious scamp for my mind to settle on it indefinitely.

After all, ‘Arthur’ had honestly somehow managed to tarnish any possible respectful opinion towards himself the very moment the first words he spoke to me left his mouth, and I couldn’t help but feel it was as though I was but mere prey to his coy intentions. Seeing him as someone I idolised was out the window almost immediately. 

Yet, the longer I spent in the mansion, the more I had my doubts. 

The greater chunk of residents were very kind to me, showing no signs of pity and trying their best to occasionally school me on some things of the time. They were awfully far off from what I had expected, and as the weeks stretched on, so did my bonds with them. And Arthur, surprisingly, wasn’t except from that. His kindness was irritatingly casual, consisting of stacks upon stacks of gestures that were played out with nothing but a generous smile and a flighty wink. 

But it was through that I began to actually accept him for who he claimed to be. 

I had gotten stuck in a conversation with him in his room late one night, him having coerced me in just as I was about to retire for the day. He was long past trying to tease me in the way he had on the first night I’d arrived, and I was glad, but I was also long past being so skittish around him. Maybe there were other reasons why I was so easily convinced, but those I wouldn’t try to dwell on.

The topics we spoke of were of light, the occasional flirtatious remark being thrown in by Arthur here and there, but then I noticed a notebook laying open on his desk behind him. He sat in the desk chair, turned to face me, and was clearly not paying very much attention to it.

“Arthur,” I said, trailing off hesitantly as I continued, “If I’m allowed to ask, what’s that on your desk?”

His lips curved up in a concerningly sly smile as he twirled around in his seat, picking up the quill while simultaneously wagging a finger as if to tell me to come over. Curious, I did, leaning down to rest my elbows on the desk to read as he twirled the pen between his digits expertly. 

“I’ve been starting on something new recently,” He explained, the smile never leaving his face as he studied my eyes that scanned the page. 

“It’s not much, but it’s a start. Am I right, ___?”

I didn’t answer, almost mesmerised. His personality may have been confusing, but there had never been another person that write quite like the real Arthur Conan Doyle. I guess I had just been doubtful for no reason. 

I trailed off. “A start…”

I was acting strange and he knew it, but his smile only grew. It was as if he could see exactly what was running through my head, but I didn’t see the need to be concerned. That was just Arthur, after all.

“___?”

“It’s.. good. Really similar to your first books, actually.” I said absent-mindedly, the words slipping out of my mouth before I could dilute them. “Not that that’s a bad thing! Your writing style is just distinctive compared to a lot of other old time authors.”

“So I’ve got a fan, hm?” He turned to face me, his eyes almost level with mine. The words I’d said had obviously gone in one ear and right out the other, but of course, if it pleased his ego, he was due to comment on it.

“I didn’t peg you as the type.” He said. 

“The type?” I looked back to his eyes and felt my cheeks flushing under his gaze as I tried nervously to cover for myself. “It’s - It’s just, I’ve really liked your books ever since I read them back in school.”

“My books are read in schools, hm? Ah, how the times have changed.” He said wistfully, fully showcasing his selective hearing. I simply forgot about my bashfulness at that moment and scoffed, though secretly enjoying the gleeful look in his eyes. 

“Every single one is considered a classic.” I said. 

Though he said nothing, he looked undeniably happy, yet, unexplainably sad. There was absolutely nothing that seemed right to say about it, though, so I just stayed silent, watching his eyes fluctuate for only a moment before going back to normal. 

“Well, my dear lady, if you fancy them, then they must be marvellous after all.”

The happy look was back in his eyes, but I couldn’t forget about what I’d seen. Though, that was something to be saved for another time, and I knew it. Soiling his good mood, however real it actually was, wasn’t my intention.

I nodded, shyly admitting, “I do admire your books.”

“As someone who also writes for a living, though not in the same form, I still find inspiration from your works.”

Arthur seemed to change right before my eyes. I didn’t know what the words meant to him, and unless he told me himself, I knew I would never know. But whatever the cause, he seemed to relax under them. 

He brought his hand up to pat me on the head, his large hand mussing my hair. I let him. 

The action was somehow friendly, a pleasantly happy smile gracing his lips as I looked down to meet his eyes. His intentions were clearly pure, and that alone had my chest welling up as I smiled back. I was enjoying this side of the man ineffably more than his intensely flirtatious side so far. 

“What you’ve got so far is good.” I said quietly, standing up with a soft smile as his fell back to his side, “Keep it up.”

He just watched me as spoke, but I didn’t squirm under his gaze now, the soft look swimming in his eyes dimming my hesitance greatly. He was looking at me in a way I couldn’t quite describe, but he almost seemed starstruck. 

“Good night, Arthur.” 

He gave a short laugh, his brow slightly raised. I began to walk towards the door, seeing that as the end, but before I could get far, Arthur grabbed my wrist delicately. 

I turned around, my lips pursed with the words I wanted to say, but before I could so much as get a word out, he planted a graceful kiss on my knuckle. 

“Good night, ___.”

[shametheshadow]

It's been a while. A lot of shit's been going on since I was last kinda active. Sorry, I dont remember how to hide this under a read more line... feel free to scroll past if you arent in the mood for existential whinging. I got a new job and it's pleasant. The people are nice. It's still food, but it's at a fancy restaurant where the management actually cares and tries to keep their crew happy. The hours could be better and I'm currently sick of salads with how many I've made. They give hours based on reliability and if you're a hard worker who is nice to work with. But like... everybody is nice and hard working so it's hard to just muscle in sometimes. But on the positive side I've dropped ten pounds, probably thanks to how light my wallet is. Had an issue with my little brother. Well, there's been an unspoken issue for years that I've been trying to just give him space on, but it finally came to a head. I called him out and he said some pretty hurtful things. I saw him on Christmas, but it wasnt the same. I think it kind of damaged something between us, or at the very least it certainly has me. I think, as people, we build these pillars of absolute truths into our identities. The things we know without a doubt, that we can rely on to stay true even when things are bad. Like, that the sky is blue or that a parent we have will always love us. When those truths are shaken they really make you wonder what else could be wrong or if there was ever any truth in it to begin with. For me, no matter how bad I felt or hated myself, I knew I could be a good sister. I'd throw myself down for it. I have done so, unfortunately, many times before. We all see the world a little differently, so my truth may not be the truth someone else sees. I dont know whether that makes it any better, but I certainly feel unsure about more things now than I used to. Some days I even feel like giving up on our relationship. I'm just too tired, too worn down, and I don't think I can handle being called a failure again. Which sucks, because I dont really want to. I just want to know how to fix it, even though I'm not sure I have any more energy to try again if it's just going to lead to another failure. And on top of all of that my bio dad and all those siblings are tasting the bitter consequences of their actions. My youngest sister got taken away from her parents because instead of breaking up and being adults about it they have to be petty and cowardly. One has unchecked anger issues mixed with plenty of excuses and the other thinks she's owed some sort of respect despite her immature actions. Thing is, I've had plenty of talks with my bio dad about the effects their toxic relationship have on his 6 year old daughter. He knows. He isnt stupid or blind. He'd just rather keep it going despite everyone's unhappiness and dig a deeper hole so he doesn't have to risk losing custody of his daughter if they break up. And here we are now. With his daughter taken away and given to our 21 year old sister who doesn't have a clue. And they've failed to regain custody once already. And you know the fucking hilariously tragic part of it? Me and my sister Des are the only two without some sort of record so nobody else in the family can help. Just a fucking warning for any teens out there who think being a gangster is cool, life always has consequence. Doing drugs, selling pills, pimping, stealing cars, assault, having unregistered weapons... my family has probably done just about anything. Apparently my bio dad's stepfather even threatened to shoot my grandma once. There's an argument to made about the environment they all grew up in, but I really wish people would just have the self awareness to realize that things will always find a way to bite you in the ass and it's it big enough then it'll get the people around you too. I normally get my sister on weekends, but I need to work Saturdays as a requirement for my employment. I try to cut it short so I can be there when they drop her off, but half the time they dont and send her somewhere she isnt supposed to go. I'm risking my job trying to be there when I'm needed, just for them to change their mind at the last second because I wasnt home soon enough. They'd rather risk losing our sister to the system by breaking the rules. CPS doesn't play around. I've had to tell them two or three times that I couldn't take our sister because I was sick or dealing with some really stressful family stuff that Koral didnt need to be there to see. Every time I feel like the punishment is that they stop letting me see her by not bringing her over anymore. Then out of the blue they call on a weekday and ask if I can take her because she has a day off or something. I have never once said no but every time it sends me into an anxiety attack because I can't handle being kept in the dark until they need me. It's got me so worked up that sometimes I genuinely wish I had never been told my dad wasnt my real dad. Of course, I know that by knowing I can help a little girl who needs help, but I wont lie and say that I never wished I didn't have time deal with any of it. I got the news today that my bio dad is in trouble for something else, though they wouldn't say what. So they arent going to give him custody until that's settled at the very least. Shortly into it my sister had asked me to take over the guardianship. I was so out of the loop that I thought the question was absurd. I thought they'd pull it together and get her back in a short time, so what would the point of moving her to another town and school be? How would I go about that? What would the home requirements be? Would I be able to provide for the both of us? I wouldn't be able to leave work until 4 at the earliest shift, so would after school stuff be best or daycare? There's so much that goes into taking care of a kid to just spring that question onto someone. Now it's been four or five months and I'm hating the idea that she's stuck there in the middle of it all more and more. People keep telling me I should take her. Even my manager after I broke down and told him everything after my sister's call left me a mess at work, said that I would be the better option. I know what it's like to be fought over in custody battles and I understand way too well the fear of being taken away from your home as well as what it's like to change schools. I dont want that for Koral. I dont even know if I would be the better option. I talked to my cousin, whom I live with, about it for a while last night and she said she wouldn't be opposed to having Koral with us... but I feel bad making this her issue too. I want what is best for my sister. She's way too smart. You know when unqualified pet owners get a dog breed that is really smart and they struggle to meet the needs to keep it entertained so it just makes trouble? That is what my sister is like. My family has their strengths, but Koral is 6 and could run circles both physically and mentally around them. It might be "funny" now, but Lansing itself is a shitty influence on people and by the time she's a teenager and wants to go to a party, nothing is going to keep her from getting out short of bars on the windows and doors. The only thing stopping her from doing it now is motive. But would I do any better? I genuinely dont know. I wish I could talk to my brother about it. He knows where I come from and, even if he thinks I failed, he could at least tell me how to be better so I dont fuck up again for a little girl who is in a situation similar to one we were in. I asked Des today if she wanted to talk to their case worker about transfering guardianship. She said she's have to talk to her dad... which is bullshit. He lost the right to dictate where Koral goes when he fucked up. How is he supposed to be motivated to fix this if the only thing that has changed is that she doesn't sleep in her bedroom anymore? He shouldn't see her when he wants to or be able to say what happens to her. And I dont say that because I think he shouldn't ever be able to, because I want him to step it up, I just feel like he wont if things keep going as they are. I dont want to lose my sister to the system. Supposedly the social worker said that Koral also has to stay in the same school and can't see anyone not on the already approved list of people for the sake of consistency... but that's stupid. I know that changing schools can be traumatizing, and if Lansing was a good place to live and raise a kid, then maybe I'd try to make that work, but it isnt. So it makes me wonder that if I came to the table with a clearly stable, appealing plan would they change their minds? If it were my choice, I'd have her in therapy to help deal with everything, maybe a sport like gymnastics or whatever else she might be interested in to keep her engaged. I'm planning a kids d&d session for her and another kiddo that she plays with when she's here because last time she found my monster manual and got obsessed. And I know it wont be all good. She's a handful and a brat, and she can be a force of nature when she doesn't get her way, but I've been an older sister since I was five and my family didnt out up with bratty behavior. I know how to deal with it, and I also know how to use the internet and other resources to learn. Hell, I live with a child therapist/youth minister. I know I could do it. Even if it ended up being a permanent thing. I'm torn between the fear of not being enough at the expense of my sister's wellbeing and knowing that I'd gladly twist myself into a pretzel to try and do right. But when it comes to other people, especially a kid, is trying enough? Good intentions don't equal a quality of living. So yeah, that's where I am right now. Trying to be better and figure out who I am while also being incredibly stressed out and lost. If you read through this, thank you for listening to this TED talk. I'm open to advice.

[citialiin]

ZIGGY ✰ STARDUST

i jacked this from @cardinalrot​. thank you dad. tagging: @gothsic​ ; @blossomingbeelzebug​ ; @betelguide​ ; @thatcertainnight​ ; @prophesyed​ ; you, specifically, reading this.

𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐬

FULL NAME.     [ redacted ] * NICKNAME.     ziggy  GENDER.     agender (he/him or they/them) / typically presents as a “man” for simplicity’s sake and also because he doesn’t care enough to think about it for more than 4 seconds HEIGHT.     5′10″ AGE.     26 (earth years) ZODIAC.     ??? (he wasn’t born under our stars ... so .......) SPOKEN LANGUAGES.     any/all (he doesn’t really know them, though, he uses an internal translator)

𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬

HAIR COLOR.     bright red, seemingly unnatural -- but it’s natural EYE COLOR.     left pale blue, right black SKIN TONE.     very, very, very pale BODY TYPE.     skinny. very skinny/slender/svelte.  willowy and tall and bony.  good for looking waifish on magazine covers but bad for lifting even vaguely heavy objects. VOICE.     posh, nasally, low, the slightest bit condescending.  speaks with an english accent despite not being english, let alone human.  drawls his vowels and enunciates his letters.  his voice is strangely clear and bright when he sings, unlike his somewhat unpleasant speaking tone, and he tends to sing in higher pitches than his speaking voice. DOMINANT HAND.     ambidextrous -- but he can only play the guitar left handed POSTURE.     very straight and proper, holds his head high and his shoulders square.  uncertain if it’s height alone or if he really is looking down upon you.   SCARS.     small incision in the back of his neck where the translator was placed. barely there and usually covered by a collar or his hair, anyways. TATTOOS.      none BIRTHMARKS.     a large yellow disc on his forehead, rimmed with a slightly darker yellow/bronze with the slightest hint of a chromatic shift affect due to reflecting/light catching pigment in skin cells.  this isn’t unique to him, however, as every member of his race has it. has the tiniest hint of a freckle above his lip, on the left side, and he hates it and wishes he could nuke it off his face.  both of these are usually covered, anyways. MOST NOTICEABLE FEATURE(S).     the circular mark, his unusual eyes, his sharp features, his bright hair. everything about him is weird and outlandish and strange, but it helps him maintain a striking, marketable image.  

𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝

PLACE OF BIRTH.     far away.  HOMETOWN.    faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar away. SIBLINGS.    [ grabs the steering wheel and veers straight into worldbuilding headcanon territory ] the society he comes from is no longer sexually dimorphic and typically doesn’t reproduce the natural way.  having evolved far beyond such icky things, they use genetic samples from large swaths of the population to make consistent batches of new individuals -- the genetic samples are screened for defects and aberrations and sort of tossed together into a genome salad, and out comes however many individuals they need to fill in gaps in the population.  there’s a lot of consistency in his species due to this: everyone has reddish hair, everyone has heterochromia, everyone is about the same height, etc.  so technically, he’s related to everyone in his “batch.” PARENTS.   he wouldn’t ever know -- a lot of people, probably

𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞

OCCUPATION.    rockstar -- cultural icon -- celebrity -- musician -- singer -- model -- jerk CURRENT RESIDENCE.    london, LA, NYC, but he’s constantly moving and tours quite often CLOSE FRIENDS.    few and far in between -- he’s friends with his drummer who is named priscilla but usually goes by the stage name WEIRD, as well as siddharth, his bassist, who goes by sid in his personal life but GILLY on stage.  they were the first two humans to encounter him and taught him everything he knows, from how to tie his shoes (aliens wear boots, and you should know this) to the C major scale -- because they are among the few humans who know his secret, he views them as his closest and dearest friends.  his stardom isolates him from them, just a little -- he likes the spotlight but they don’t mind just being “the drummer” and “the bassist.”  they don’t quite have the star power that he does.  his manager  -- tama ahinariki, some guy from new zealand who seemed to bumble his way into becoming in charge of one of the most successful musicians of the decade -- also knows he’s an alien, but they tend to be more business partners than close friends.  tama is more interested in the money side of things whereas priscilla and sid are only interested in the music.  ziggy has stock in the music, money, and his personal brand.  

via rp, he’s made some friends with other characters! a few. very few.  RELATIONSHIP STATUS.    single -- he intends to stay that way.  he gets all the action he could ever need from his legion of devoted fans and groupies.  even in situations where he’s romantically involved and emotionally invested, he would never consider himself exclusive or monogamous.   a lot of tabloids make rumors that he’s involved with cardinal copia, fellow rock icon, but he tends to be sneaky at hiding any time they spent together.  it’s hard to keep things private when you’re both massively popular public figures, though. he goes out of his way to be sure no one knows about his predilection for spending time with thomas, because the last thing an awkward alien in disguise needs is a lot of public attention because people think you’re dating a celebrity (who they don’t know is also an alien). he hangs around annie a lot, too, but this is extra extra under wraps, because annie has a stalker named jonathan who may or may not go apeshit and try to tear his head off or something if he finds out.   FINANCIAL STATUS.    filthy rich. should be guillotined.   DRIVER’S LICENSE.    doesn’t have one. he has some paperwork, somewhere, with a “real” name and all that, but he has no idea where it is and lets his manager deal with that stuff. CRIMINAL RECORD.    none ! clean slate.  that doesn’t mean he doesn’t do illegal things, though.  he just doesn’t get caught.   VICES.    smoking, drinking, la cocaina, sex, impulsive spendng, rockstar stuff.  

𝐬𝐞𝐱 & 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞

SEXUAL ORIENTATION.   bisexual. PREFERRED SEXUAL ROLE.     submissive  |  dominant  |  switch  | top |  bottom | verse. this doesn’t really come up in rp because i dont write nsfw. the way i view it is that he’s lazy and would rather you take care of him than the other way around LIBIDO.    pretty high, but it’s difficult for him to have as much sex as he might prefer because, uh, he has, uh, alien..............parts...........and stuff ..... like ....... some parts down there look different ....... so he’s stuck having sex with usually in the dark, under sheets, and he has to zip his pants up really quick afterwards. maybe it’s a little bit hilarious and i just think it’s funny idk LOVE LANGUAGE.    selflessness (which is big, for him, king of all douchebags and lord selfish dickhead the third), rambling to you about his day, physical affection, gifts, letting you see him without make up, opening up to you about his life before earth.  he might play you music, sing to you or write you songs if he’s feeling particularly sappy.  this is stuff reserved for people that he finds himself incredibly romantically/emotionally attached to, though, not the people he has one night stands with.  and he almost never forms any sort of lasting attachment to the people he sleeps with casually. RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES.    he tends to fall for people who challenge him in some way, who aren’t easily beguiled by his status and physical looks, but who aren’t outright mean to him.  that being said, he is very vain, and he loves being showered in compliments, praise or attention.  he matches well with people who can put up with his antics and moodiness and odd behavior.  he likes the idea of being someone’s muse or someone’s idol, so he finds himself drawn to other creative types.  he has the most intimate/special connections with other nonhuman beings, especially other aliens, cuz he feels like they Get him and he wouldn’t be really giving himself in his fullest form if he had to still play pretend that he was a human being.  for whatever reason he goes apeshit for goth guys/dudes with black hair who wear a lot of black.  he really doesn’t like people who are too much like him, because HE’S HIM, and you’re YOU, and he really wants it to stay that way.  GET OUT OF MY DRESSING ROOM

𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬

CHARACTER’S THEME SONG.   there’s a whole album about him .......... theres a song called “ziggy stardust” .......  HOBBIES TO PASS TIME.    singing, music, writing -- he lives for that shid.  he likes art in all forms, so he reads, watches movies, looks at paintings -- he has a lot of human culture to catch up on, and he loves all of it, from any time period and any culture.  he also likes buying things, shopping, looking nice, gossip.  he tends to be a party animal (party alien?) and often indulges in more hedonistic fun. LEFT OR RIGHT BRAINED.    his brain is not structured like a human brain. also, head empty.  no thoughts. FEARS.    being perceived as ugly or untalented, being outed as an alien, being rejected for being an alien, becoming a nobody, losing his social status, becoming a conformist, becoming “outdated” or “uncool” SELF CONFIDENCE LEVEL.    somehow sky high and on the floor at the same time. he usually thinks he can do anything and he’s pretty perfect, but that may just be from a solid few years of repeating that to himself and empty praise given by people who are just crazy obsessed with him -- he built his confidence level on a very shaky foundation, so it’s easy to start making him doubt himself and panic if you know what to criticize him on VULNERABILITIES.    a lot of things, and im sick of typing

* pay me 100000 USD to unlock my LEVEL 20 ZIGGY STARDUST LORE pack now with NAMING/TITLE INFORMATION, HOME PLANET CLIMATE/WEATHER PATTERNS and PAST OCCUPATION/EDUCATION information.  includes a piece of gum i found on the floor.

[strangesigils]

What kind of rebellion??? What what? I wish I had that power djsbsvshsg

OKAY so for those of you that dont know I work in an elderly care facility as kitchen staff.

We got this issue where the main important elevator, the only one that opens on the floor where the main entrance to the building is, is old as shit. It breaks down every day, sometimes multiple times a day. The elevator will not hold more than 350 pounds but they’re saying the go-to limit is 2 people because we have many residents that dont have the capacity to ride the elevator alone.

Weve had one of these types of residents get stuck in the elevator with their daughter for nearly 20 minutes. It’s a small space and it gets hot in there with the weather getting warmer here (even though spring has only just begun). This years summer in my area is predicted to be the hottest summer on record, when highs already go as high as 40C normally. The regular break downs in combination with the weather heating up makes for some dangerous conditions and every possibility for something to go wrong. To put it bluntly it’s a safety hazard.

For deliveries like bulk groceries or oxygen tanks we have to bring them down a flight of stairs to a floor where the other usable elevator is because were not allowed to use the main elevator for them anymore due to the short weight limit.

All these issues have been brought to the attention of management and the owner and they do nothing. They send in a dude to ‘fix it’ about once a week, which usually just consists of him turning it off and on again, taking some readings on the control panel and looking increasingly more stressed with every reading he takes.

Were coming under new management (same owners though) so we had a meeting today to brief us on what might be changing and to assure us that our jobs are safe as well as to answer questions. So naturally I asked 'how much say do you two have in regards to whether the elevator gets replaced?’. Old management was also present for the meeting and the moment I said that her head snapped around and she was like 'WHAT!?’. So new management did this spiel about how it doesnt need to be replaced we just need to not use it for deliveries of any kind and that theyve ordered certain parts to get the thing repaired. According to a coworker of mine that’s been there a while they said they ordered the parts to fix it years ago and they still havent shown up, so thats probably a load of crap.

So I got together with most of the Care Aids and we agreed that this is bullshit. So I proposed that every time the elevator breaks down with somebody in it (that doesnt involve deliveries), we make sure to get it recorded on paper as an incident report, or in the case of it being a resident and a family member, we will walk the family through filing a formal on-paper complaint. Make sure these reports all get sent into the office. They are required to keep physical reports like these on file by law and the way weve been told to do things to this point is to just talk to the managers, which doesnt give record to anything. So by doing this we put more and more pressure to come up with a permanent solution, or else next time a major incident happens with that elevator they’re going to find themselves in a lot of trouble. We will leave no shortage of proof that there have been problems with it for a long time and they chose to let it sit, and that makes them completely liable for any accidents that take place as a result of those problems.

And everybody apart of that conversation agreed so that’s how were going to be doing things now whether management likes it or not. I also happen to be on the newly formed hazard prevention and safety committee so as a member I’ll be taking it upon myself to keep photocopies of all these incident reports in case the originals in the office get 'misplaced’ somehow.

Not exactly a riot, but theres something kinda metal about using the system against the higher-ups that are supposed to benefitting from it in the first place.

It’s not really about power, I just get really charismatic apparently when I’m pissed about something.

[artisticallys]

              omg hey... what’s going awn  ?  i havent dont an intro in soooo long i dont even have anything fun or interesting to say about myself errrrrr my name is sam  !  i use they/them pronouns we big chillin.... im real bad at answering messages but i get to them eventually i schwear. yep that’s all if anyone wants to plot or whateva just lmk okie  ?  there’ll be a tl;dr at the bottom before plots if u dont wanna read all this it’s a lot-_____-  without further adieu may i present miss scout kang.... 

﹤𝙺𝙸𝙼 𝙲𝙷𝚄𝙽𝙶𝙷𝙰, 𝚂𝙷𝙴/𝙷𝙴𝚁, 𝙲𝙸𝚂𝙵𝙴𝙼𝙰𝙻𝙴﹥; * - hello SCOUT KANG. long time no see. i know a lot about you. like how you're TWENTY TWO, how you're a GAME DEVELOPMENT major,  and in fact.. how you KILLED YOUR TWIN BROTHER AT HIS REQUEST AND LIED TO YOUR FAMILY ABOUT HIS PASSING AWAY TO STAY IN THEIR GOOD GRACES. would be a shame if it got out, wouldn't it ? so let's play a game. 𝚃𝚁𝚄𝚃𝙷 𝙾𝚁 𝙳𝙰𝚁𝙴 ?

ok so yeaaaaah her secret is kindve a lot ! we gone get there... but first i gotta discuss her childhood u kno ? set things up <3 scout was born to 2 vewy loving parents with a twin brother. there were complications in the pregnancy some medical shit i cba to research but basically her brother wasn’t getting all the nutrients he needed to develop with a good immune system. scout was born two minutes before him, he never let her forget it with his hag jokes and she never let him forget when it came to calling shotgun. 

as i said her brother was born with an auto immune deficiency it left him in a place to get sick very, very often. almost anytime he caught the flu he was hospitalized and generally his life was lived through a glass case from the outside world. and oddly enough it made scout feel trapped too as he was her twin flame, they were the best of friends and wherever he was she wanted to be. there came a time where his health plummeted drastically, doctors weren’t sure he’d make it and the pressure of it all finally cracked down on their father

not being able to watch his own flesh and blood rot away in a hospital bed he took his chance to get out while he still could and vanished into the night never to be seen again. scout remembers hearing an argument between her parents before pretending to be asleep when he came into her room and gave her a final kiss on the forehead and secured her blankets about her body.

it was a shock, really, when her brother pulled through and was somehow stronger than ever. an elaborate hoax was curated by their mother but scout knew, and deep down she thought her brother knew too. but it’s hard to give life to such a grievous monster and so it stayed in a grave.

life went on, doctor and hospital visits became routine and her brother never let things get in the way of living his life. in high school they were quite the pair. mostly it consisted of conversations about where they wanted to run off to after graduation, who their dream spouse was ( he always wanted to marry the student body president while scout had dreams of marrying some degenerate *her brothers words* ), things theywanted to do before dying. they wrote that stuff down on an old study guide scout was using to cheat off of for ap chemistry....

which was something she did often as early middle school days, her mother planted the seed of her going to medical school. to find a way to help people like her brother and at first it was a welcomed idea, do good for people like the one she loved more than life. time went on though and the pressure to have a 4.0 to get into a good premed school with tuition help was mounting. it made dreams that had been forced upon her to morph into something ugly but there was no hopes of standing up to her mother, not when she was already looking forward to such a future. but scout didn’t have the best work ethic when she wasn’t really invested in something, she was smart yeah but that just... wouldn’t cut it and she found that out real fast

her scenes changed quickly during the summer of junior year. her brother had fallen incomprehensibly ill, worse than she had ever seen him and the fear she had as a child slowly crept back, licked up her neck and nested on her shoulders making a home there. reports came back soon enough and he was diagnosed with leukemia. at first it was manageable, some chemo and radiation should do the trick, they said. then it became bone marrow transplants and blood transfusions and fluid drips. she was the first to volunteer, obviously as his twin, for marrow transplants, blood, any organs he might need. 

desperation came in the form of a crying mother after news that he wasn’t going to live past christmas came. it came to scout as her mother accused the doctors of knowing nothing and doing nothing for her son. and it lastly came to her brother when he had been going through these treatments for 2 years and he still could feel how his soul was rotting away. how he was just a carcass in a paper thin nightgown. 

it was then he proposed the idea they travel and cross things off their bucket list and scout both ready to escape greyed walls and sterile affections as well as their small town agreed, readily. took every penny she earned from working, even opened up a gofundme for this trip and was lucky. things went well, so well in fact, that the pair forgot that half of them had one foot in the grave already.

until one day his pain became unbearable, too much for him to handle anymore, and he asked scout as she was helping him into bed after an attempt at leaving the house that day. it was hushed, whispered in shame and fear. had what he just said really happened? was the summer sun getting to be too much? it wasn’t until he had cleared his throat and said it with his chest, “i want you to kill me.” 

call her wrong but she actually laughed. retracted from him with brows creased and a confused laugh slipping out. there’s no way he could be serious. but when he didn’t laugh too she knew he meant it and that’s when she knew she had a choice to make.

it took a week of pondering the thought before she came to the conclusion that she’d end her brothers suffering. they spent the next few days doing something that haunts scout to this day really: planning the best way for her to kill him. for her to end her twin flame. 

their last night together was something memorable, spirits were shared and tears were shed. he left her with only 2 promises to keep.   1. never reveal to anyone that she ended his suffering and 2. to stop letting their mother decide scout’s life and future

she didn’t go to his funeral. didn’t want to replace what she had left of him with what was in that coffin, spent the night drinking homemade sangria and watched star trek. his 2 favorite things. 

this obviously didnt go over well with her mother, went even worse when scout announced she had dropped from pre - med and planned on becoming a video game developer. she was called an embarrassment, a failure, and that she would end up nowhere. and for a while she believed it, still does. 

she got really lucky though when the streaming community got more recognition and now she plays video games for a living and attends classes to make good games. 

TL;DR 

scout grew up w a really sick brother, their dad left, and scout basically became her brother’s keeper. was forced into studying shit she had no interest in and when her brother had enough suffering asked her to take his life, which she did. now she streams video games with hopes of making her own and somehow finding her mother’s love again. 

𝑃𝐿𝑂𝑇𝑆𝐼𝐸𝑆  ? 

got the songs it’s you & bang bang stuck in my head rn maybe some romance shit off theeeees? dunno...

dudes... some people who knew her AND her brother growing up like maybe they went to hs together idk maybe they’re like girl what ever even happened...

ex’s yupppp gimme

her bestest friend(s) maybe even shares her world w them u kno? im in it...

maybe something unrequited or like some sort of clueless sheet who knows!

frenemies...? like enemies that actually just have some weird tension they gotta get through :kissing:

literally anything u think scout would be good to fill like if u got any wcs?

OMGGG wait last one. i really want someone who her brother was in love with or like had feelings for and shit got crazayyyy after he died we can discuss

[thedapperrabbit]

She-Ra Rewatch: season 3 and onwards through season 4, and boatloads of Introspection time!

So Ive been rewatching She-Ra with my partner, because sharing Entrapdak is caring. I could probably squee on about that for a century or more (because eeee, sharing things i love with people i love AND THEY EVEN PAY ATTENTION TO THE THINGS AND REMEMBER THEM!)...but ill spare you, kind internet strangers who for some reason find my thoughts mildly interesting enough to be reading this. This is going to be a lot. Like, a LOT. A lot especially from a stranger that youve probably only seen a notification from due to me sticking a heart on your content or for reblogging something lovely youve made in pictures or words. I dont think anything is going to be violently trigger-y because im not always great at judging that stuff and also ive yet to feel quite comfy enough to be  fully open-posting specifics about my own past trauma, other than a vague allusion to self-harm and distant-ish unspecified abuse aaaand the usual childhood garbage truck of assholes....but i suppose you could possibly draw some darker potential conclusions from the content im focused on. Also, my ADHD makes it incredibly hard to keep to a straight and non-branching narrative so...ramble-y bits and expressions of brain frustration ahoy. Either way...you are forewarned, just in case. Sorry in advance, this is going to be a small booklet by the time Im done explaining, and thinking, and then attempting to stick words to abstract feels which sometimes im great at, and then others i fucking suck at...but at least this is all written and not me trying to say this to any of your faces! Thats....a mercy all of its own. Haa...  Anyway, while rewatching with my partner, I realized just how much more painful parts of it are to sit through now...they were the first time, and each time since, but NOW having spent a while mulling over the series as a whole a bunch, and reading a lot of other peoples writings on here and finding myself largely in agreement with most Entrapdak fan’s assessment of things, I just....feel like all the air is ripped out of me during some moments, watching  with keener insight. And despite thinking i had myself reasonably well figured out by my age, its all also made me further consider a few things about myself as well. Particularly my notable internalized fury response to chunks of it which have been consistent through all my viewings of SPOP. With Hordak at least, its way easier to understand my reactions. For me at least. Maybe not so much for the people around me. And, shittier due to intensity and subject matter, but still easier in the long run because...the broken bits in me that he resonates with are fresher and sharper and still more recent, like within the last ten years, and thus more towards the front shelves in my head, compared to things that resonate with Entrapta, which are all old, lifelong dull aches at this point. I feel like nothing i can point to is fully sufficient to fully express my feels involving Hordak. But, maybe the best representative moment is with the crying i do every damn time I see his face looking up at Prime just after he glimmer and catra were beamed up...because ive seen that face in the mirror. I HAVE MADE THAT FACE. That same. Goddamn. Face. I may not have gotten a jab to the back of the neck directly from the person I made it at...but they often seemed to silently goad me to harm myself in an attempt to jolt my brain out of getting stuck in re-looping through what theyd just done/said to me. Likewise, much of his interactions with Entrapta are very...very weirdly familiar in feeling, but in a good way. Watching the stuff with Hordak hurts because fuck me if it isnt frequently like watching myself back in 2008ish to 2013, which was the duration of the worst parts of that particular circle of hell i parked my ass in. So...that makes sense. Hes so well written in those moments, it occasionally gave me PTSD flashbacks (still does a little, but now im prepared and braced for it and can shrug it back off....thanks, lifetime of therapy and years of studying abnormal psychology! Still totally not an expert, just very passionate...just, as a disclaimer).  Entrapta though...Entrapta is a different story. Mostly, I see Entrapta and in her free expressions of delight and joy and her bouncy enthusiasm I am reminded of a younger, less discouraged me in some ways, and in others, a “me” I could have been, but...well, extremely early-onset anxiety and depression made me insanely self-conscious super-super early on...not that i was great at hiding or...i guess the term people seem comfy with is “masking”? Which was a huge problem, or so it was in the 80s when far less was understood of such things. Id do so for a bit and then would forget to, in a way (because id forget long enough to go and trust again reflexively) and would get badly bullied and would squish everything down until id feel a crumb of safety again, and then almost instantly ADHD would pop that mask right the rest of the way off aaand it would start all over again. Ad nauseam until my teen years, where the depression sort of “fixed” that, and made it much easier to destroy my desire to share much of myself freely at all, save for with one or two people, and to a less deep extent a broader circle of nerd friends. Course, then i hit 30 and ran out of the majority of fucks I used to give. Or I became so damaged and salted with anger that parts of me dont grow any fucks anymore? Either way, plowshares to swords, WHEEEE!) And, maybe thats where this time while watching, I started to really think back to all that, and to how i see Entrapta treated by the other princesses, or really just in general except by Hordak...and why it burns my biscuits so badly. Every time I see someone roll their eyes at Entrapta’s beautiful unbridled enthusiasm or try to make it seem distasteful or at least weird and unwanted and uncomfortable for them but then dont even bother to try coming to terms with why they feel that way... or how they seem to feel free to grab and manhandle her without her consent, or the way they try to lessen her contributions because shes non-normative? Like its the fucking least she can do to make up for being weird in their space (...okay, that might just be the anger kicking in..but i dont feel like its an entirely innacurate assessment, is it?)  All of that...seeing it inflicted upon someone, It feels like someones punched me right in the damn sternum, but because its a hurt that im so desensitized to, it seems to have a much different effect than the sharp, violent crushing pain that i feel when I relate to Hordak a little too well for comfort. Again, i could go on, but its nothing more eloquent people on here havent already spoken volumes on. And my first gut reaction is always “I dont understand! why is that their reaction to her?! it doesnt seem logical at all, i dont seem to be able to parse it correctly, how is this acceptable? I HOPE SHE IMMOLATES YOU ALL.”. Which...I suppose isnt entirely usual for me (the silent wishing that people be immolated, I mean...i blame my past years of working in retail. And devouring too much Warhammer 40k contentl).  (oh gods...and this is going to be the most clusterfucky part cause i can feel my meds kicking in and thats gonna be hard to keep coherence on but i gotta get this all out of my head or ill forget it or get too scared of you fucking BRILLIANT insightful smart people on here and then ill continue to live scared and regretful that i never said..anything, and just sat here like “noticeme, entrapdak sempais!”  Ehhn...which is to say, if this is a garbage dump from here down, dont worry, when i wake up ill fix it...but hopefully itll at least make a tiny bit of sense ) But I realized something...something I hadnt ever rememberd much about due to the shitty neuronormative (apology if thats wrong term) behaviors continuing over years and years but in less and less directly aggressive ways as i grew older and was more prone to losing my shit in , (and likely because I got excessively lucky and managed through...uhhh...agonizing determination? Sheer stubbornness? Alleviatory rebalancing of universal karma? fuck if i know --to  curate a surprisingly supportive circle of other castoffs and misanthropes.) That was exactly how people used to treat me.  OKAY THISLL BE EDITED LATER to add in the rest of what i was gonna say...im...too full of Ambien sleep meds and damn write it anymore...and im aing trouble separating realigty and dream...an i k apawing at the kybord...not safe Lov yous for reading this far. Il fix it later, swears.