#i feel like 3 raccoons in a trench coat

[lavender-eyed-lies]

One of these days this whole autism bs is gonna fucking kill me, really starting to understand why we die fucking young 😮‍💨

I had a convo with my partner, but bc my black and white ass has gotten so used to having to fish out nuance when someone makes a yes/no STATEMENT I take it as a statement.

When someone tells me "no u cant do that its too dangerous" I don't hear "I want you to be safe' I hear "No you can't do that bc I just said its too dangerous"

When someone says "I don't want to talk about this, I just don't care about it" I don't hear, hey I need a break from this convo for a short period bc I'm at my bandwidth limit for empathy about this" I hear "don't talk to me about this I don't give a shit"

And I'm Hella frustrated bc my last partner said and meant ever thing he said, if he said my shirt looked slutty he didn't mean anything else he thought I was dressed provocatively, in a teeshirt, if he said you can't talk to your male family members he didn't mean anything else by that but that I was not to talk to male family members and that was that (yes he's an ex for good reason)

I feel like I'm having to relearn people from non abusive non autistic people.

But at the same time I know I still have to work at the shit I do, I can ask people to be direct but I know it's not gonna happen, it's just how people are, they don't wanna be like here's my squishy bits see how sensitive and fragile they are can you pls not smack em?

I'm guilty of it too sometimes! Other times I'm incredibly vocal which is also something I need to work on.

I dunno man, it's probably the sleep deprivation but like, how do autistic people talk to non autistic people without a script? I really don't want to go back to practicing conversations in my headand all their potential offshoots just to make sure I'm not sticking my foot in it ;----; I'm too tired for that shit but at the same time I'm tired of arguing and snapping at people for not knowing how I feel bc I didn't tell them bc I didn't want to put the effort into practicing how I thought it would go 😵‍💫

I might have to go off my fucking meds tbh, the emotional gutting might not be worth it but at least I felt more capable back when each and every mishap argument and so on felt physically painful and therefore worth avoiding at all costs despite the emotional drain.

But I also don't want to off myself.

How does anybody get anything done 😮‍💨

[rottenpumpkin13]

Out of Context Shit Heard on the SOLDIER Floor #2

Angeal: let's keep our homicidal thoughts to ourselves from now on, shall we?

Zack: FREE DUCKS! FREE DUCKS! GET YOUR FREE DUCKS

Angeal: Sephiroth i will pay you 100 gil to put on a shirt

Genesis: 🎶 what atrocities will Genesis commit today? 🎶

Roche: i feel like i taste like lasagna? do i taste like lasagna? lick me, Kunsel

Essai: can someone check my dick for dick ghosts?

Sebastian: fuck it we, ball *pushes Zack down the stairs*

Kunsel: can I have one? *referring to the 17 rubber chickens in Roche's arms*

Cloud: does anyone want to pay me to break Commander Rhapsodos' knees?

Zack: *with a moogle plushie in hand* I've named him Terrence

Kunsel: jokes on you! I can't even read!

Sephiroth: male pattern baldness isn't a joke, Angeal.

Cloud: if you slap his ass it'll deflate like a souffle

Genesis: who the FUCK spelled my name as GENEVIEVE???

Angeal: Markers !!! Are not !!! For sniffing !!!

Zack: sometimes a boy gotta do what a boy gotta do *with the stolen masamune in hand*

Sephiroth: where did you guys get cotton candy???

Genesis: i may look like a stable individual but in reality I'm just 3 raccoons in a trench coat

Cloud: Has anyone seen my will to live??

Roche: if i put a pipe bomb in commander Rhapsodos' office will you kiss me?

Zack: who wants to talk about Mpreg with me???

Angeal: this is why we can't have nice things *referring to the break room coffee machine on fire*

Luxiere: Ow! Zack! Did you just bite my leg!?

Zack: Gen, can i borrow your clown makeup?

Luxiere: if you say YOLO one more time I'm going to make you swallow your shoes

Lazard: IT'S L-A-Z-A-R-D! IF YOU SPELL 'LIZARD' ONE MORE TIME ZACKARY, IM GOING TO TRANSFER YOU TO GOD

Angeal: who's bottle of rum is on my desk ????

Genesis: hey, mommy issues, have you seen Zack? *talking to Sephiroth*

Zack: where on Gaia am i supposed to find 16 garden gnomes on such short notice ?

Roche: maybe if you weren't such a LOSER the answer would come to you

Sephiroth: your eyebrows look like they were drawn in crayon

Lazard: How many SOLDIERs does it take to change a lightbulb? seven, apparently

Genesis: 🎶 i got a lock of Sephiroth's ha-ir, i got a lock of Sephiroth's ha-ir 🎶

Angeal: is this the mental stability you speak of, Genesis???

Kunsel: why stop at one SOLDIER? why not insult three or four? fuck it, KICK SEPHIROTH'S ASS

Sephiroth: Smell my breath. Can you tell I've just eaten an entire sheet cake?

Angeal: I'm one inconvenience away from dying my hair green

Kunsel: if i have to hear the red man recite LOVELESS one more time I'm commiting arson

[cowgirliee]

Every time I have to have a friendly conversation with a Dutch bro employee I feel like a real person and not like 3 raccoons in a trench coat

[genderqueerdykes]

i just wanna pop by and say that y'all have made me feel so validated as someone with a complex gender identity. like i'm not really a man but i am just some guy but i'm also wizard of indeterminate gender but i'm also a goth girlboy but i'm also three raccoons in a trenchcoat!

YES THAT'S THE SPIRIT!!!

gender is such a complicated thing that having a gender with a bunch of facets is super common, i'm really glad you've been able to come to terms with having a complex identity!! i hope you're able to have fun with it and just express yourself and be who you are, it doesn't matter if someone tells you you're not all those things, because guess what? they don't live in your head & body, they literally don't know you!

i am also 3 raccoons in a trench coat and a goth girlboy X3 i think you are very rad and i'm glad you're having a good time with your identity!! that's the whole point babeyyy! take care, feel free to come back at any time! you are appreciated

[rydr--system]

RULES OF ROLEPLAY

⋗My blogs are semi-selective.

Only mutuals will have access to full paragraph roleplay. However, anyone can send in OoC interactions like asks, memes, or questions. This blog focuses on long form roleplay (1 or more paragraphs).

⋗The mun(i.e. player/writer) must be 18 or older to follow/interact.

Nothing suggestive, NSFW, or explicit involving minors will be accepted or tolerated. Pull anything like that, you get yourself blocked and reported.

⋗IC =/= OOC.

Actions my character takes or things my character says do not 100% reflect my own thoughts.

⋗No godmoding/metagaming.

Only work with information your character knows, and never assume any of my character’s actions. You cannot control what my character does, and I can’t control what yours does. Nor can either of us autohit the other.

⋗Crossovers/OCs/Multiverse characters are welcome.

I can’t guarantee I’ll know all the facts about your character or their canon, but I’ll make sure to read your lore or information before interacting IC.

⋗Lolis DO NOT INTERACT

I do not feel comfortable roleplaying with characters who are identified as ‘loli’ characters.

⋗I use the new post editor exclusively.

If you refuse to, expect your replies to come at a lower priority to those who do. Sorry, guys, it’s just too much to try and work with, and it requires new posts all the time instead of one thread, which makes it harder for me to track. Posts using the new editor are easier to trim, too.

⋗Needless to say, bigotry will result in a block.

If you’re a terf, nazi, swerf, racist, fascist, antisemite, zionist, or transphobe, I will ignore your existence just like everyone else should. Shame on you.

⋗Give me time to reply, I’m only one human, not 3 raccoons in a trench coat.

Depending on my life outside of this blog, it might take me longer to reply to things. It’s fine to check on things every few days, but constant messages or haranguing will kill my energy to rp with you.

⋗Triggers will be respected on both sides.

I have some odd ones. You probably have some odd ones. I will always tag the obvious warnings (self-harm, graphic violence, emeto, gore, suicide, death or animal death, etc) but if you have a unique need, just let me know!

⋗I only ship with chemistry.

Canon ships are not guaranteed if there isn’t chemistry between our muses. Just because our muses date in most universes, doesn’t mean it’s going to happen.

⋗I don’t do exclusives.

I may develop ‘regulars’, but all blogs are equal to me, and each character duplicate will have their own universe.

[kelyon]

TMI Tuesday!

Good morning Tumblr!

Story time!

I've got a wedding coming up this weekend and my sister-in-law and her boyfriend are going to be staying with us in our underground hovel of a two-bedroom apartment. Knowing this, I planned in advance to extend my federal holiday break with another vacation day, so I could have a four-day weekend full of cleaning. As I write this on Monday night, approximately 20 minutes of cleaning has been done over the past three days. And I've got plans that will eat up a good chunk of my day off tomorrow, so let's double down on the time wasting by opening up my inbox!

The final chapter of Dark Mistress has been posted. Curses were broken, true loves were kissed, a happy ending was had by all (of the main characters.) I've got a brief little epilogue jumping into the future, gonna post that next Friday, June 9th. And then that will be a wrap on Dark Mistress.

I don't currently have plans for more of this story. There is a part of me that wants to remix the whole last third into its own novel-length fic. (I've been mentally titling the story of Belle and Bae, Help! My Step-Mother is the Dark One, but the real remix title would be Dark Mother.) I don't really want to do it, because it wouldn't be a Rumbelle story. And motherhood is such a huge and loaded topic, I don't know what I could say about it as any kind of thesis for the story. And I really don't know much about infant care, or even living with a child full time.

Most importantly, I think a lot of those subjects (Bae getting along with his step-mother, a cursed character feeling like she isn't good enough to have children) will be addressed in my next major fic, Golden Love, coming January 2024.

In the mean time, I'm planning a Summer of WIPs, where I either finish or at least update some of the fics that haven't seen the light of day in a few months. Or years. More details to come once Dark Mistress is finally in the rear view mirror.

So.... yeah. Feel free to bug me about all of that. Last week was a surprisingly sparse Tuesday for questions. This has offered more evidence that all my lovely anons are really just 1-3 raccoons in a trench coat and they were all sick last week with raccoon flu. I hope you're feeling better, my precious anonymous raccoons.

I hope everyone who reads this has a wonderful day.

Dark Mistress is here

My inbox is here

[earthquakxr]

Rules for Mobile

My blogs are selective.

Only mutuals will have access to full paragraph roleplay. However, anyone can send in OoC interactions like asks, memes, or questions. This blog focuses on long form roleplay (1 or more paragraphs).

The mun(i.e. player/writer) must be 18 or older to follow/interact.

Nothing suggestive, NSFW, or explicit involving minors will be accepted or tolerated. Pull anything like that, you get yourself blocked and reported.

IC =/= OOC.

Actions my character takes or things my character says do not 100% reflect my own thoughts.

No godmoding/metagaming.

Only work with information your character knows, and never assume any of my character’s actions. You cannot control what my character does, and I can’t control what yours does. Nor can either of us autohit the other.

Crossovers/OCs/Multiverse characters are welcome.

I can’t guarantee I’ll know all the facts about your character or their canon, but I’ll make sure to read your lore or information before interacting IC.

Lolis DO NOT INTERACT

I do not feel comfortable roleplaying with characters who are identified as ‘loli’ characters.

I use the new post editor exclusively.

If you refuse to, expect your replies to come at a lower priority to those who do. Sorry, guys, it’s just too much to try and work with, and it requires new posts all the time instead of one thread, which makes it harder for me to track. Posts using the new editor are easier to trim, too.

Needless to say, bigotry will result in a block.

If you’re a terf, nazi, swerf, racist, fascist, antisemite, zionist, or transphobe, I will ignore your existence just like everyone else should. Shame on you.

Give me time to reply, I’m only one human, not 3 raccoons in a trench coat.

Depending on my life outside of this blog, it might take me longer to reply to things. It’s fine to check on things every few days, but constant messages or haranguing will kill my energy to rp with you.

Triggers will be respected on both sides.

I have some odd ones. You probably have some odd ones. I will always tag the obvious warnings (self-harm, graphic violence, emeto, gore, suicide, death or animal death, etc) but if you have a unique need, just let me know!

I only ship with chemistry.

Canon ships are not guaranteed if there isn’t chemistry between our muses. Just because our muses date in most universes, doesn’t mean it’s going to happen.

I don’t do exclusives.

I may develop ‘regulars’, but all blogs are equal to me, and each character duplicate will have their own universe.

[bells-of-black-sunday]

//people who play survivor do realize killers aren't obligated to give them hatch right lmao

We have objectives, some people are going for adept and others jus want the bps. u aren't entitled to hatch because ur teammates played bad

[citricsystem-moved]

Endo, non-traumagenics, & OC blogs please DNI!

I wanted to make a funny alter trope post like @relatable-system-things’s post! mostly because I was afraid of making their post too long

Feel free to tag or reblog with your headmates >:)

1. Worst driver

2. Best driver

3. “What da dog doin’”

4. Polite arsonist

5. Bookworm that never reads

6. Obsessed with candles, wax melters, etc.

7. Handles any bugs in the house

8. Refuses to eat their vegetables

9. “Aubrey I’m sensitive”

10. Three raccoons in a trench coat

11. Short king (energy)

12. Grabs leaves from bushes when passing by

13. Most bonk-able

14. Cishet that’s on thin ice

15. Plushie hoarder

16. Only listens to anime openings

17. Lives off of caffeine and spite alone

18. Avid pants hater

19. Won’t stop quoting vines & tiktoks

20. Boneless

21. A stray animal coaxed inside with treats

22. Nicest handwriting, grammar, etc.

23. Is making picrews constantly

24. Acts so tough but would instantly cry in any altercation

25. Loves the color purple

[theregoesmylurkerstatus]

SPOILERS AND ASSUMPTIONS FOR CAMPAIGN 1!

OKAY, let me start by categorising what spoilers I know as best I can, going (mostly) in chronological order AFAIK:

Clarota betrays them (VERY sad, when I first watched those first 10-ish episodes I was fully behind Keyleth’s ‘trust him’ train)

Vax loses a foot to lava and also his snake belt rip

Kima and Allura are the cool, trustworthy PCs, as is everyone’s favourite, Gilmore, a shopkeep with a black belt in karate

The dragonborn guy’s homeland gets dunked on and then later he dies offscreen

Percy’s sister is alive and betrays them but only kind of? I think? She was held captive by the Briarwoods for years and Percy thought she was dead, but she was blackmailed/brainwashed/tortured?

Vax gets cornered by the Briarwoods alone by accident (classic)

There’s a chick called Ripley who makes guns A Thing for the wider world

Something about a sun tree? It’s a creepy tree? They hallucinate their own corpses on it? Or something?

They probably kill one of the hottie vampires at the end of Percy’s arc, I think the male one? Because the lady vampire shows up later?

Percy dies in his arc and it’s the second res ritual they do, after Pike’s one pre-stream

“Take off the mask, darling.” I still don’t care about romance but I feel obligated to mention that I know that famous line

I also know the equally famous “I thought he’d never leave” bubble bath bit, ah Laura

There’s a CHROMA CONCLAVE attack right at the end of Percy’s arc, somewhere

Rashian is a dragon or something, everyone laughs at Liam for not knowing this. I know nothing else about who the Chroma conclave is (3-5 chromatic dragons??? One of each colour????) or what they want, except Vax levels up in the middle of fighting one and Keyleth yells at one

There are communication earrings. There is also a weird black powder man. Victor?

They actually have a permanent home/keep unlike the Mighty Nein?

Vex dies because Percy didn’t check for traps, this is the start of some deal of Vax’s with the Raven Queen which means he multiclasses into paladin?

Vax can fly, he can fly, he can fly!

Uhhhh there’s a couple cursed swords or something in there lol

Percy sells his soul briefly? Genius move Smart Guy lmao

Feywild??? Somehow????? They meet Artagan and make a deal with him for a doorway, and they spend an episode as cows somewhere in here?

Keyleth has Mom Trauma, I don’t know how much this will feature in the campaign

Vax and Vex’s dad suxxx or something, mother is dead

Scanlan hits on his surprise daughter and everyone screams

They have some kind of year long adventuring group break for some reason?

Keyleth makes a storm on an airship (???) and this is cool. Also she turns into a fire elemental a lot and this is also cool.

There’s a kraken fight? It goes really badly, like LEGENDARILY badly, and ngl I’m kind of looking forward to it

Scanlan #LOSESIT and has his legendary ‘what’s my mother’s name?’ rant, after which he leaves for an undetermined number of episodes and is replaced by Tary

This leads to Grog spelling C-A-T for some reason and this???? Makes people cry???????? Truly something you had to be there for

Pike tries to commission drawings of VM for Tary (who calls Vex “little elf girl” and braces for impact when Laura’s nostrils flare) and this goes Very Wrong in a funny way

Tary’s dad sucks

He writes a book

Some NPC reads said book in campaign 2, hence why I know about it

Grog has an arc to do with the other Goliaths who beat him up for defending Pike’s dad?

When Scanlan comes back he tries to sneak in, Vex chases him and he panics and casts modify memory on Vex, it fails several times, an angsty moment becomes comedic very fast

He is received with Mixed Emotions lmao

Keyleth turns into a goldfish and kills herself, this is both apparently extremely painful and extremely funny

Vax gets disintegrated and dies in a beholder fight (rip)

Gilmore is not a dragon but everyone was fully convinced he was. He also gets bodysnatched or something at some point to freak out VM, but they figure out very quickly it’s not him

Scanlan is Ioun’s chosen? Whatever that means, something to help fight Vecna I think

“It was an honour knowing you” sad! Sad! Sad line! Gilmore doesn’t understand, cheekily responds, and leaves!!!! Liam looks on the verge of tears!!!!!! SAD!!!!!

There are so many true love nat 20s. I don’t know what any of them are except that Pike has one and Ashley looks like she’s about to cry

They win the Vecna fight and Keyleth gets the HDYWDT, Scanlan wanted to save a Wish spell for Vax but couldn’t, so he stays dead

Everyone cries here but at least the rest of the party is okay

Keyleth is the last woman standing and everyone cries at this too

And then Grog uses the deck of many things, spawning two oneshots to clean up his mess

Also somewhere in here Vex steals a broom from a guest (lol)

Assumptions!!!!!

More tears than campaign 2 I think, since there are at least two resurrection rituals we see on screen that I know of

The fights might be more stressful since they’re higher level?

Scanlan is going to be the most sexual and lewd character because he is played by Sam

Vex is going to be the second most sexual and lewd character because she is played by Laura

Vax will still instigate most of the one-on-ones so Liam can have as many heavy conversations as his theatre kid’s heart desires

Keyleth will try and fail to make the group more moral

Pike will not try to be moral at all despite being four feet of blessed armour and adorable hair

I think other characters try to make Percy feel remorse for Murder Reasons, but I suspect he’s not going to feel that guilty (I will likely support him in murderous endeavours unless they are FAR more messed up than I currently believe)

From what I understand Grog is Loveable but not hugely layered or complex, and I know Travis was proud he didn’t cry this campaign. I suspect I may be surprised at the character depth Travis gives him, however.

Keyleth also thinks the gods are overrated and I AGREE

Percy is three feral and eldritch raccoons in a trench coat, held together only by sheer force of will and the fragile shell of a posh accent. No one notices because it’s a really cool accent.

There will be a lot more money/shopping/drinking elements than in campaign 2, since I know Vex is a haggler, Percy is a Lord, and Keyleth is a day-drinker? As are Grog and Scanlan

It will be funny for me to see Taliesin play a smart character and Travis a dumb one, though I know that the whiplash went the other way for most people lmao

Vox Machina will be less team-heavy than the Mighty Nein? I gather they’re more of an ‘individual hero’ makeup than an ‘everyone has support abilities’ makeup

It will be more fast-paced than campaign 2? It seems like a lot of the arcs lead directly into each other, with only the occasional shopping episode break

It feels like it might be less friendship heavy than the Mighty Nein? Like they seem more like ‘we’d die for each other’ pals who otherwise spend all their time trying to draw dicks on each other’s faces

They have a more clear “party leader” than the Mighty Nein, who might be Percy and/or Keyleth

I think most PCs and NPCs are more morally clear cut than in campaign 2, like most towns and people in positions of power are either “cool guy who can pitch in” or “get rid of this abomination immediately” territory

I think my favourite character will be Vex, Percy or Keyleth. I just feel it in my bones. 

I think I may also get an extreme soft spot for Grog and Pike, however

My main sources of surprise will be, I think, how things fit together? Like I have no idea WHY they’re in the Feywild, or most other places really, or what any villains’ motivations and backstories and personality traits are, and how they end up fighting any of them in any particular place for any particular reason. I don’t even really know characters’ abilities or literally anything done in any of the fights, aside from “they win/nearly die” and “Scanlan uses Wish and Bigby’s Hand against Vecna”

I assume most plot threads all lead into each other fairly solidly and that they don’t actually seek most of their stuff out?

This assumption will either be fairly right or hilariously wrong, but -- I assume that I already know almost everything important or shocking? I tried really hard to avoid it but being active in campaign 2 meant that over time I got exposed to more and more of campaign 1, and I genuinely believe that I have almost everything down, if not details or order. I don’t think I’ve missed any big moment or impactful arc

Let’s see if I’m right

[sapphicsaro]

For the SVU asks thing: 10, 13, 15, and 17! :) absolutely love your blog btw!

hey! thanks sm — i really appreciate it <3

10.) best olivia hair season

listen i am BISEXUAL, mariska has always looked incredible regardless of the hairstyle — HOWEVER, i do happen to love her with longer hair.

i would say my top styles are: season 1 bob, season 8 BANGSSSSSS, current season (23) waves, and that straight middle part shoulder length from season 17

13. least fave character past/present

oof, well all the perps are disgusting (thats a given). so it depends, i HATE that one DA bucanon? or however tf his name is spelled, but you’re supposed to hate him…so? not sure if that works?

if its least faves that we were supposed to like, number one is kim greyleck. i was/am a huge casey novak stan so seeing her right after already made me biased but she was horrible with the victims. could not stand her.

as for current? the new guy. something with a v? he replaced kat which was a blow to me as a queer :/ i don’t find him likable at all and i’m kind of upset the show replaced a queer woman of color with him. idk! just me tho??

15. which character dresses the best?

i better not get shit on for this but—

every. single. outfit. that angela wheatley wore, i would rock in a HEARTBEAT. mama came in, blew up kathy, then brought it to the runway.

also liv’s coats??? idk if y’all can tell from the breakdowns but i’m so into the trench coats and blazers. 10/10.

17. all time favorite episode

with a show that has 500 episodes, there’s no way i’d be able to choose just one!

some faves (& why):

slaves (S1) - the psych evals. the minute i fell in love with each character…oof. from cragen’s break, to olivia’s breakdown, to munch’s callout, then monique and elliot?? so good. and this is when i really realized how much me and olivia are alike! so yep, a top contender for sure!!

night (S6) - again, love casey novak and when she got hurt we got to see a vulnerable side of a character who was pretty reassured and tough. plus mrs. potts, doc oc, AND rocket raccoon?? amazing

raw (S7) - this was just a really good plot twisty episode and shocked me the first time i saw it with it’s ending. tough to stomach as a jewish person, though.

blast (S7) - AS A MELINDA WARNER STAN, i have nothing more to say. what a queen 💅🏼

(can i say all of season 9????)

zebras (S10) - yes, for bensler, but also for gwen 🥺 i love carol kane so much ugh

perverted (S11) - all the bensler vibes but also a damn good episode.

(here’s where i confess that i’m catching up on svu i’ve missed and my knowledge of episodes is a little weak when it comes to seasons (11-21). i’ve just finished 16, 17, 18, so i’m catching up!! but apologies if ive missed a good episode!!)

“benson in trouble” (multiple seasons) - idk if i can call them favorites because that sounds wrong(?), but as a survivor i really find it cathartic to watch the episodes where olivia is in trouble (the william lewis arc, the townhouse incident, etc.). my therapist says it’s because i feel a sense of control and know what what’s about to happen, know that she will survive it and bc i see myself like her, i feel a sense of relief. tmi? ahhh

unholiest reunion (S17) - just a thrilling episode!!

heartfelt passages (S17) - dodds…. and tucker/liv!

gone baby gone (S19) - cmon, so good. but also i just love any and all scenes ever that we get of olivia being a mom

part 33 (S20) - very interesting introspect on the behind the scenes of the detectives. i really enjoyed this debate and honestly was captivated by their reactions.

the return of the prodigal son (S22) - i mean… i don’t need to explain this one.

(ALL of organized crime. no joke, i think i like it more than the current episodes of svu. i much prefer how they are writing their characters!!)

[angeloncewas]

That disclosing your race one is the real red flag. This is the internet I don't have to tell you shit about myself, not my age, not my race, not my gender, absolutely nothing. Ridiculous.

I think I get where it stems from ? Like if I'm a minor I don't wanna be talking to an adult in the same way I would another kid, y'know? And vise versa for adults, and there are situations where certain things come into play (though I personally don't put too much weight on identity like that, that's a me thing)

I just feel like people online forget that you can lie. People will lie to you. I'm 2 and 25 and 104 and a hot Asian girl near you and also 3 raccoons in a trench coat who just wanna get into the movie theater. Anybody could say "oh yeah I'm poc" and not be. I don't think most people would do that bc it's weird as fuck, but there's just no telling

(And ofc you don't owe people personal info lol I was just considering other angles)

[keirametzbrassknuckles]

Ok same coat anon. No need to apologize! You were agreeing and providing context which I appreciate bc I am not fashion-literate (I just possess the innate skill, sometimes referred to as “taste”, to look at a thing and appropriately say “ew”.) Anyways I am looking for a long winter coat appropriate for winter in the american south (no snow, only occasionally below freezing, during which time I can layer.) I am 100% just going to choose from amongst the offerings at TJ Maxx or Nordstrom Rack, but for funsies, what are your fave coats? Coats you actually use and love and/or fantasy coats you’d get if you wanted to splurge money. Educate me, I need fashion guidance<3

Honestly anon not enough people have taste. Its rare these days.

As for coats for your weather you can't go wrong with a nice trench. I'm aesthetically allergic to that camel color but it will probably never really go out of style. You should check Zara too, sometimes they have good deals on fashionable outerwear. If you take care of it it'll last too. I had a grey peacoat from Zara that I wore throughout college and loved.

I live in a place where it gets quite cold regularly so I wear this coat:

(Or not exactly this one - an older version of this coat that I bought secondhand. It has flap pockets instead). It's double faced wool with thinsulate or something and I find if I have a wool base layer on I stay pretty toasty.

As for fantasy coats I adore: this wool and leather one by Alexander McQueen (for some reason I can't find a not-blurry image). I would actually wear this one too which is more than can be said for the rest of this list.

This one by Dior (2018 I think?)

These are "menswear" (clothes are genderless stfu) but I've been OBSESSED with D&G f/w2014 recently:

Fucking ridiculous but I would wear all of it.

This 1919 opera coat by Paul Poiret that I just can't get enough of. The pattern is a LEATHER lattice applique and makes me lose my mind a bit.

I feel like I'd be remiss if I didn't mention the Dior tarot coat. Also literally anything in black velvet or brocade makes me salivate like a sick raccoon so literally any coat or jacket in those materials lmao.

[steponmepinkjun]

I NEVER FINISHED MY STORY OMG. ok so i left off at being too proud to tell my friend she was right and kpop fucked hard. the difference between u and me is that i’m too good of a liar. too good. i kept up the “i hate kpop it’s cringe” facade for ALMOST TWO WHOLE YEARS, I SHIT YOU NOT. why? bc my dumb ass, extra ass, dramatic ass self thought “ok if i’m gonna have to deal with the embarrassment of admitting i’m wrong, i better do it in such an extra ass way it’ll knock ur socks off so hard that YOULL be the one embarrassed not me.” the original plan was to learn the entire choreography to bts dope, bc it’s the song that she told me to listen to and inevitably the song that got me into them, but later switched to bts fire bc i saw too many of those “choreo matches w any song” videos, and then her birthday party came up. and here’s the real kicker. her birthday is April Motherfuckin Fools. so it would be So Perfect for me to reveal my kpopism as a birthday present And a april fools prank in one. so i was Set on the Reveal being on april 1st, but the day rolls around and god that choreo is so fucking hard and i am Not a dancer. never have been. so i abandon that and go ykno what… i’ll do it Next Year. BC MY BITCHASS WAS LIKE NO THE MOMENT IS TOO PERFECT TO DO IT ON A NORMAL ASS DAY ITS GONNA BE ON APRIL FOOLS ON HER GODDAMN BIRTHDAY OR NOT AT ALL. a year rolls by, i’ve told most of our friends except her and they’re all in on it, i’d made so many subtle kpop references to her without her realising they were fully intentional and had too many scares where she almost figured me out but i lied my way out of it, and i’d given up on showing off with choreography bc i couldn’t make that shit look good. i’m not a dancer. i am, however, a rapper, and a damn good one, so i inhaled the agust d mixtape and decided i’d just rap the eminem of kpop’s anthem at her face. in korean. and change the lyrics at the end (if u haven’t listened to agust d, the bridge repeats “i’m sorry” a lot) to “i’m sorry i kept this from u for so long” and “i’m sorry i actually ult got7 not bts” (this was like the april after skz debuted ok i was holding onto got7 for dear life knowing full well skz we’re going to convert me smh) and the best part? she never saw it coming. her official present was a cd with a bunch of kpop on it but she thought it was just a personalised mixtape for her so i told her to play the first song out loud and she knew the song Instantly. it has a long intro so she was like “i guess u did listen when i recommended u this song!! i knew you’d like it since u like rap so much!!” and then i started rapping and i shit u not. she started SCREAMING. like the initial reaction was her jaw dropping and then instinctively covering her mouth but when i kept going and she realised i wasn’t fucking around she just fucking screamed like a banshee. at the end during the sorry bit i threw off my jacket to reveal a got7 shirt on the inside and she fell off her chair and started rolling around on the floor. needless to say it was every bit as satisfying as i thought it’d be LMAOOOO afterwards her ass was like “I CANT BELIEVE U HID THIS FROM ME FOR OVER A YEAR” and when i tried to explain my ego couldn’t take the “i told u so” she was like “you know i wouldn’t have made fun of you for it right? i would just be glad you’re not hating on my boys anymore” so basically i’m a big dramatic fool and she was always too good for me.

don’t mind the weird spaces here my ipad is being all fucky wucky w me rn. damn sad to hear ur sideblog experience didn’t go so well, i’d have shown u the cool side of the fandom if i knew 😤😤 leading u thru the cursed halls of kpop stan tumblr like a sketchy tour guide that’s actually 3 small raccoons stacked on top of each other like a trench coat, like “over here we have the fanfic writers that honestly need to publish a book, over here we have the gif makers that are responsible for my entire camera roll, if we take a quick swerve past the death threat anons and the twt fanwar screenshots - mind ur feet bub the 14 year olds were tryna make a grab for ur ankles - ah here’s the holy grail of shitposts, you might be here for hours, to the right we have the weird aussie side of the fandom that projects our childhoods onto chanlix but also all the members as we decide what their life in australia would’ve been like, and down there is a secret trapdoor to the blogs w endless random headcanons that will make you laugh, cry or blush depending on if the author woke up and decided to choose violence today. enjoy your Stay!” but then again i’m not so active on tumblr anymore (ngl you’ve become the highlight of my tumblr experience these days, interaction wise,) so maybe all my Local Hotspots are inactive now. i know a bunch of them are, it’s sad. “i don’t fw stan twitter for the same reason i don’t hang out in meth dens” oop. guess i’m a meth addict. no but i get u i rly do, it’s a hellhole out there, but the fact that things get shared and spread a lot easier than on tumblr and how short most things have to be (therefor keeping up w my adhd attention span without having to resort to the mental torture that is tiktok, with the added bonus of not always needing headphones.) that i just. couldn’t leave if i tried. maybe i should try being active on tumblr again but it’s a dying site in comparison.

“their music doesn’t consistently hit for me as much as skz” i’m sorry we can’t be friends anymore. what. what. you don’t dramama ramama ramama hey? you don’t feel a little jealousyyyyyy, naega anin? you don’t shoot out, shoot out, shoot out, or aremdaeun love killa love killa? you can’t be your hero du du du du du du du du du dududu? u disappoint me. literally like everyone i know who likes skz music likes mx music like it’s a rite of Passage. they’re kindred spirits, monsta x music is like skz’s music’s cool but mildly heterosexual older brother. neither of them know what a bad song is it runs in the family. and both their music runs in my VEINS. whenever i describe my music taste they’re always the first two that come to mind, skz being my number 1 bc they are my best boys but mx bc of the Flavour. pls listen to the entire the code album then get back to me 😤🙌 ok but fr ur so right they are 7 of the finest men i ever seen (yes i say 7 bc i’m including wonho cause he deserved better and i’ll die on my ot7 bullshit.) like don’t get me started on them either LOL i LITERALLY downloaded that one insta video of changkyun working out his back n arm muscles w his tattoo showing bc i needed that shit saved for Science. they could do Anything w me like frfr. yes vixx is the bdsm contract group i’m telling ya they wildin. or at least they were. it’s been years since their last comeback idk what they’re doing anymore tbh. and yeah that makes sense, savouring the hyperfixation i feel it, but also i’m so attached to skz that i never let it die. like i hyperfixate on other things and other groups but i will Always go back to skz cause they’re my homeboys. hell, they’re my home. being a predebut stay i’ve spent more time w skz than most of my actual family members at this point. but that’s just me you do u boo xx just know that if ur anything like me ur never letting go once skz it’s been my longest lasting fixation cause they hit like Nothing Else Do. ik i’ve already said that but i cannot stress it enough. they’re really special. i’m gonna stop here before i get all sappy and emotional bc i really love those boys so fucking much and i don’t drop the L bomb often. SIDE NOTE I WOULD LIKE TO SEE UR LIST OF GROUPS RANKED BY THORSt. i need to judge ur Taste. and omg cat&dog is such a guilty pleasure song bc the lyrics make me cringe so much bc while pet play can be fun they be doing it in more of an “i’m an innocent soft dogboy uwu” kinda way that just Does Not Sit Right with me. it comes back to the objectifying of asians that asians themselves don’t help in industries like these and maybe i’m looking too far into it when rly it is just wholesome n cute or maybe they are into some pet play shit idk idc i will bop to the song regardless but i will not acknowledge the lyrics nope.

YOURE RIGHT THO SKZ’S OPENNESS IS IN FACT, A BIG DEAL, i’ll grab them for u if u want but i found these twt threads of skz supporting the lgbt community and i just felt a special kind of happiness man like sure the delusional part of me likes going “haha they’re gay” bc my brain likes to imagine them as my polycule of mlm boyfriends bc sometimes thats what gives me the serotonin to get me thru the day ok don’t judge but also bc it’s nice knowing that yes i’ll never know them personally, but at least i can support them knowing they’d respect my gender identity and my pronouns, they’d respect who i choose to love, and that’s already more than the general public can say so shit, it is special! it’s special that they don’t treat being cishet like the norm - they constantly remove gender from their songs and speech entirely, they don’t assume all stays are female anymore, we don’t talk abt the babygirls incident cause we got babystays in the end outta that ok, and it’s just. so refreshing and important to me bc i can’t get that anywhere else!! like my semi ults are the boyz and while i love them very much and there’s no way all 11 of them are straight i refuse, i do get just a little bit sad whenever they she/her their fandom by default and call them their girlfriends n shit even tho i do still identify as a girl, i’m also genderfluid/nonbinary/transmasc, and i have a very love/hate relationship w my womanhood and rarely use she/her pronouns, cause it’s like, do you not see me? see us? the ones who aren’t cishet women? i mean i know kevin does bc he congratulated a fan who came out as nb but it’s just not the same as the openness we get w skz. like how do i trust cishets i could be supporting them as a queer person when in reality they’d call me a slur. what would i know, behind the screen? so it’s so good that skz go the extra mile to make it a safe space for everyone. this is already long enough i will reply to the second half of that ask in another message… tomorrow cause it’s 1am and i’m tired gn -felix bi anon

I'mma have to start putting these under a readmore so that i don't absolutely make everything who is still following me for some reason go totally fucking insane 😂

NDJDHWJJAHFNAKBSJSBFBHHDBDNAJD YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE FACES I WAS MAKING READING THIS, I WAS FUCKING CACKLING AND GASPING EVERY OTHER SENTENCE SO HARD THAT I SCARED THE CATS NDJWHSHSB the fact that you went "oh you want me to get into kpop? Give me a hot minute, and I'll give you a whole ass private concert for free" biduehsjdbd biiiiiiiiiiitch you're a fucking ICON, I stg I could NEVER 😂 (and not just because I couldn't find a tune if you gave me a printed set of Google maps directions and that I embody the steriotype that white people can't dance, like my sister kept sensing me tiktoks of the whole "dance like a white girl" trend going lmfao look it's you and eventually I was like "sis please this trend has me feeling like being white is a disability and these mothafuckers are being ableist 😭 also I could NEVER be that on beat so yall ain't even doin it right 😭😭😭😭"). Tbh if I told one of my friends (lol what friends, i got jokes) to get into Skz and they showed up at my bday and performed the entirety of I Got It I would simply shower them in money and go "aight everyone else go home, you are no longer needed, you are being laid off, your position has been eliminated, we're downsizing, the company is moving up and you're moving out, you are not qualified for this role any longer, best of luck with future endeavors" 😊

I think part of the reason I can't deal w Twitter is the exact reason I refuse to leave tumblr, in that I've been on tumblr since 2006 and twt since 2008, and tumblr literally has not changed at all, not even a little, whereas going from the early days of twt where there were no corporate sponsorships or ads and you had to manually copy and paste someone's tweet and @ them to retweet it, to how it is now, like 90% ads and showing me shit from the timelines of people I don't even fuckin follow n whatnot, it's just not enjoyable. Idk how anyone finds anything on twt, it confuses and frustrates me because I am old and have not adapted well to technology changing 😂 But arguably, the skz fanbase doesn't want me on skztwt anyways so like it works for both of us lmfaooo. I am old and cringey, and also still think of twt as stream of consciousness whereas tumblr is your teenage bedroom where you can decorate the walls with anything that interests you. I do really love the nonsensical kpoptwt shitposts tho fhshsbdjjss like it is a very specific flavor of mental instability that I enjoy immensely 😂 OH and also I initially misread part of that and thought you were saying you actually irl do meth and I was like 😳 WHAT DO I SAY TO THAT. HOW DO I HANDLE THIS. Like how do I express like "I wasn't being judgy of people who use substances cause I've been there but I was just being insensitive 😳" And then went back and reread it and was like WHEW, IM JUST AN ILLITERATE FOOL 😂😂😂😂 ejeywhdhrhjwbfbdjshdhdhd I spent like an hour bwign like "IS THE REASON WE GET ALONG BECAUSE THEY'RE ON METH???? WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS INFORMATION??????" hrhehshe I am literally a fuckin idiot it's fine

It's not that I don't fw them, it's more like... Okay so like there is no situation in which I am going to skip a skz song if it comes on shuffle. You will not ever catch me NOT in the mood to listen to Sunshine, if God's Menu comes on we are THROWIN the meager amount of booty meat I got hither and thither, I could be in the happiest mood of my life but if Ex comes on I will stop to SOB. And I'm not like that with most music, so mx just falls into the category of "there is a time and place." Idk why but it just doesn't forcibly grab hold of my heart and ass the way skz always does. I really don't WANT my skz fixation to ever end, but I know that eventually it'll stop giving me dopamine bevause my brain is my worst fucking enemy 🙃 like my arcana fixation is to date the longest running hyperfixation I've ever had, going on almost three years, and I used to not be able to spend every single second of every day thinking about Asra, but now... I just feel nothing when I look at arcana stuff. As you can probz tell by the fact that I hardly post arcana anymore 😂 So I know that eventually all my happiness will end, it always does, I can never stay just as obsessed with something as I was for long. I CANT SHARE THE LIST BECAUSE I DONT *HAVE* TASTE YET 😭 I'm basically just compiling a list of any group someone tells me I should look into, ranked by how strong the kitty purred upon googling pics of them 😂 My mom read my ass to FILTH over txt lmfao she was like "they're not that adorable. Maybe your standard for adorableness has gone down with You Know Who still on hiatus 🤔" bfjwhdhd like MOMMAAAAA THE LIBRARY IS CLOSED 😂 she attacks me any time I even hint at stanning other groups, she is a skz purist and stans skz only, unofficial Momma Stay of All Stays keeping me in check lmfao.

I feel like skz really do follow thru on their promise that they're a safe space for stays, it's nice to see that they hold space for anyone and everyone in their fanbase and do it in a really simple and elegant way, I feel. Like they never make it seem like "okay here are the fans and here are the token weirdos that were only recognizing to make a buck off of them" the way a lot of artists make it feel like 😑 like they don't go out of their way to act like it's some revolutionary act to do the bare minimum of not shitting on certain parts of the fandom, if that makes sense. They feel very "yeah, of course we love all our stays, this is a welcoming space for literally anyone, that's how it should be, that should be normal," instead of like "Hi fans we love you 😊 and special shoutout to you ell gee bee tee folk, make sure to buy my rainbow merch after the show!!!" you know? Like, they're the friends who would never make you feel weird or different for some shit, the friends that take the attention off you if something they know ur sensitive about comes up, instead of weirdly snapping at whoever brought the unfomfy thing up which ruins the mood and makes you feel tiwce as bad, yk? They just give off this vibe that they, and the space they create with their music, is just a genuine and chill place to be and hang out and relax and bond. I feel like they'd be the friend group that is so goofy and sweet and silly and accepting and lovely and always makes you feel loved and excited to be alive 🥺 They are all good noodles 🥺🥺🥺

[blue-shaded]

aren't raccoons already goth? no hate to u 3 raccoons in a trench coat but like is goth more of a feeling or do u dye ur hair/fur to be extra goth. oh maybe ur trench coat is black?

It’s a feeling. And black lipstick. I don’t dye my hair black. It’s always blue of some sort, right now it’s a bit faded though so it’s kinda grey-ish but I like having a cloudy look.

[theatrelesbabe]

61 68 79 93 !

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? 

ok so my family does basically a stupid gift contest every year and recently it’s escalated. stupidest gift i’ve ever given was to my dad, who is a boring professor, a set of fake facial piercings and a beanie so he could look like a craft brew bro. stupidest gift i’ve ever gotten was from my aunt, i’ll have to list the top three bc she wins every year: a faux leather trench coat, a cement raccoon, and a velvet elvis

68: what’s winter like where you live?

i currently live in ny so the winters are pretty mild (comparatively). this year we only got like a foot and a half of snow which is SO little, we usually can be expected to get at least several feet. it was super mild all around tho this year and was pretty much in the forties from february on out compared to usually being buttfucking cold through march

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

gosh ill b honest usually im the cute-things-doer (acts of service babey) but once i was feeling quite sad and was with this girl i was super close with (read: in love with) and she decided the best thing to do was to watch the calzona episodes of greys anatomy and do coloring books. however we had no coloring books and it was lateish, so we drove around to four different stores like ALL over town until we finally were able to find adult coloring books at like 11:30 at night. and then we colored them and watched tv in relative quiet for many hours after. i just remember feeling so loved 

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

it was time for a haircut for me before we went into lockdown so now im getting into the Dyke Discomfort phase where my hair is REALLY too long for my liking. it’s at my shoulders and i had been keeping it chopped to my jaw sort of casey gardner-esque. so like i wash it, let it air dry so i get those choppy waves, then yank it up into a ponytail and shove it under a baseball cap. i’m going to cut it short short when we get out of here tho b/c .... i need to

thank u for the asks darlin this was fun to do <3