#i got several deaths there lol
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my internet has been down for 2 days and now i realize how dependent i am on on internet on literally everything, its so crazy
#even when drawing and im like ok lets look up references and then i got hit by my limited mobile data#anyway while waiting for news from my ISP I've been playing baldur's gate 3#its so muchh fucking fun but also i feel like im slow as shit#like i know wrpg are usually slow but im 20 hours in and just arrived in act 2#and i was hoping i can finish the companion story like laezel first before going to act 2#also im still lv 6 lol#i felt the struggle so much especially during the run on inquisitor#i got several deaths there lol#rip laezel tho youre the 2nd most annoying character in the game
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she was the silliest billy 🥹
#dogs#pets#animals#rip babygirl i love you so so so so much you were better than all of us#jojo#we had to remove all her front teeth not long after we got her bc they were rotted so i have a ton of pics of her sticking her tongue out#she had a sense of humor too btw she was so playful#she was abused in the past so it took her about a full year to trust us but once she did she was so so so loyal and loving#goddd i wanna die i cant believe im like. looking at pictures from two weeks ago where she was running and playful#and in the past week she just. gave up. she just stopped eating and stopped being able to even stand on her own#i had to hold her while she used the bathroom cause she kept losing her balance :(#sorry if this is too gross and upsetting i just. feel like i need to reach out. to anyone#like she was diagnosed with chronic kidney disease with no real chance of recovery several months ago so i should have like#prepared myself. but idk i guess i just had blinders on lol. the vet said his dog lived with it for 4 years before dying#idk. i guess i just thought she could survive longer#pet death#mia.txt#mia.jpg
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like out of all the many, many traumas ive given elspeth my favorite has gotta be the deep roads lol. and specifically the way she never really got OUT of them. yeah so maybe her body did but not HER. shes still down there with ruck and helspith every time she closes her eyes. and during future expeditions when she goes down into the deep roads for real, it doesnt feel like some horrible nightmare it feels like REALITY and its the surface and love and warmth and alistair thats nothing more than a pleasant dream. one shes always going to wake up from. bc even in her happiest moments she's never not aware of the darkspawn digging up towards her just a few miles under her feet. and never not feeling the eyes of the deep roads looking at her, gleefully waiting for her, and knowing its not going anywhere
#i love shale but for elspeth's worldstate i dont recruit her bc im so obsessed w the dynamic of it being elspeth/alistair/oghren/the dog lol#oc: elspeth#tay plays dao#she got SEVERE shell shock being down there in the dead trenches after the realization that came from helspith's poem#why shes never seen any female darkspawn and why there apparently arent as many female wardens either#and like. Understanding that death is the absolute best case scenario for her.#alistair had to 100000% step up as the leader because she was completely out of commission. barely able to breathe let alone fight or lead#going from this unstoppable warrior who NEVER loses her nerve or control on a battlefield#to nearly dying to the broodmother bc she was so fucking terrified. bc all she could see was her own fate mirrored back at her#finally FINALLY understanding what it means to be a grey warden. and then trying to reject that reality with her entire body and soul#she pulls herself out of it enough to get out alive but she never had a moment of like... triumph over the deep roads where she had a burst#of courage and saved the day or whatever. thats not usually how trauma works and so alistair carried them thru that#thru the broodmother and the anvil and branka and back to orzammar just as elspeth was beginning to put herself back together#afterwards the lack of closure to what was one of her ''weakest'' lowest moments rly weighed her down with guilt and shame#and its only a year later during awakening when she finally reconciles with having NO choice but to go back into the deep roads#and being able to kill the mother. THAT helped. that restored some small part of her#gave her the strength to start going back down there when the need arose. resigned to an early death but ready to put up a fight#but ye. still such a fundamentally devastating thing she went thru which altered her entire personality to the point where she starts fully#embracing being a warden (bc how can someone who's seen what shes seen and done what shes done be anything else???)#and INSISTING alistair take the throne despite having always been supportive of his desire not to. even if it means she loses him.#bc its a last ditch effort to save him from the fate she's completely surrendered herself to#sigh. this game man.#i need dadw to Confirm that the grey wardens have found a cure and alistair and hof are safe because jesus christ. my girl NEEDS a win
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um. uh. hi every body. something evil and malevolent happened in my brain this month.
this is. um. a Jet Set Radio/Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Death joke AU, spawned out of a in-joke that started in a pokepasta discord. my apologies to both the pokepasta and jsr fandoms
the entire basis is the idea that Corn in Future retconned og JSR Beat as leader/founder of the GGs (is beat being leader in the og even CANON?) so Corn and Beat are the Myras. no it's not a joke funny enough to justify how many hours i sunk into drawing these. no attempt was made to change the setting, assign most of the other cast, or otherwise make this au hold up to ANY amount of scrutiny. if i tried to make this actually work somehow then i'd REALLY end up too far gone. also i keep calling myrtle!beat "Meat".
MEANWHILE, IN A BETTER UNIVERSE:,
#jet set radio#pokepasta#creepypasta#jsr#explorers of death#pokemon#crossover#gore#body horror#blood#ask to tag#long post#jsr eod#also i said ''i didnt assign almost anyone else'' but thats not entirely true.#i did assign dj professor k as wigglytuff. but i decided i needed to draw a line in the sand somewhere#and drawing dj k as eod!wigglytuff is simply too much. some mental images really DONT need to be inflicted on others#i also thought about who would be grovyle and ended up leaning towards combo#i sort of think of him as having protagonist swag about him bc of chapter 2 in teh first game.#also i have a running joke w my sibling about combo being meta-aware bc of a jp-only line he has in future#where he tells roboy he wants to save.#i swear to god i had more reasoning than this but my mind is drawing a blank rn. sad#also i guess this would imply that cube and coin would be celebi and dusknoir but theyre not even in explorers of death so RIP#i did also briefly consider clutch as grovyle bc 1. stealing things lol and 2. joke about him being future-exclusive#and grovyle is FROM DA FUTURE... but frankly clutch does not feel like he could pull off being grovyle. in my opinion.#also i guess sitting here now i suppose it wouldnt even make sense in the context of the eod au cuz everyone but the main trio is og jsr#on that note. i had no idea what to do for gum's design so i chose the most awkward route possible i guess. im sorry gum.#in general gum kinda got the short end of the stick here due to being consistently the Second-in-Command meaning she's shadow#I'M SORRY WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#well at least she's better off than yoyo. me n my sibling just automatically were like ''he's bidoof'' ''yeah he's bidoof''#also like last note. but. the jet set radio fandom is SEVERELY lacking cliche edgy over the top evil creepypasta versions of the cast
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The amount of playthroughs I have planned for BG3 might be untenable. Currently playing a tiefling bard and romancing Shadowheart, next I'm planning a drow ranger to romance Karlach, then a half-orc barbarian(?) to romance Lae'zel, then probably a Selûnite cleric to romance Shadowheart again. After that I want to do possibly two dark urge playthroughs, one with a character who's trying their best to be good and one evil one where I romance Shadowheart + Minthara and make Shadowheart a dark justiciar. Then for origin playthroughs at the very least I want to play Shadowheart and have her romance Lae'zel, then maybe play Karlach and have her romance Shadowheart? And then it might be cool to play one of the guys and have them romance each other too... I think I might have a problem
#im also looking forward to using various mods on these future playthroughs#im currently playing with 0 mods at all both so i can experience the game as larian designed it the first go around#and also bc i want to be able to earn achievements and theyve got it set up so that you cant earn achievements with mods installed >:(#come on guys im talking about like polyamory mods. its not like im gonna install a 'push enemies to their death easier' mod#why should that affect my ability to earn achievements :(#anyways if i dont shorten this list down im gonna be spending like the next several years just replaying bg3 lol#rambling
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FINALLYYYY BEAT 5BC ALL THE WAY THROUGH WITHOUT ASSIST MODE. SHOUTOUT TO DEATH'S SCYTHE FOR CARRYING ALL THE WAY UP TO THE GIANT and then a baseball bat which was incapable of landing crits on the final boss with the set i had but pulled through with huge damage anyways lmao
#ghost town... 2!#dead cells#(btw to clarify: i am NOT an anti-assist mode elitist; i just wanted to challenge myself by winning the “intended” way eventually)#(and eventually has finally arrived YIPPEEEE)#also funny how nerves work lol i got to the final boss' last phase without getting hit#and then proceeded to choke and almost die at the last moment lmaooo#i don't really struggle with him now because of the amount of time i had to spend on my first run with him using infinite retries#using a SEVERELY UNDERLEVELED panchaku and a shield that can't parry reliably (alucard's shield I HATE IT NOW & never take it)#but yea nerves will still fuck you up no matter how much practice you have lol. extremely fun boss fight tho i love it#oh yea btw the set i used:#death's scythe - front line shield - diverse deck (electrodynamics) - giant whistle - rampart in backpack#then switched from scythe to baseball bat at the end of sepulcher#armadillopack all the way through. point blank and gastronomy until i switched from death's scythe to baseball bat before the giant#then traded the last 2 for spite and open wounds (baseball bat had bonus to bleeding enemies) for giant and hotk#switched spite for gastronomy for astrolab (which CAME IN CLUTCH btw)#and then finally finished with armadillopack/open wounds/gold plating bc i got scared lol (APPARENTLY A GOOD CALL THOUGH)
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finished my first no upgrades run :]
#side order spoilers#side order#splatoon#i have nowhere else to post this so. here it is#VERY scary run#there were several points where i was mere frames away from death#but still very fun :]#kind of hoped for an exclusive badge if you won with no upgrades#but the low hacks 8 pallette badge is still pretty sick#was also hoping for more prlz but alas#i still got to go on a shopping spree after this :] got all the pixel stickers#will probably do this with more weapons. but for now im gonna take a breather lol#... and finish this season's catalog#5 more levels 😭
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I downloaded an app that I think is meant to be used for like, detailed food tracking or something, but I instead really just wanted something with this format (color coded calendar days) so I could put in one single simple entry a day to kind of rate my day overall (based on physical health symptoms).. which..... looking back over it for the new year since when I first started tracking.. 9 "good" days in about 9 months, so roughly one good day a month LOL...
#A neutral/yellow day is if I felt sick or had any symptoms (nausea. joint pains. headahces. etc.)#to a distracting degree for at least an hour or more at any point in the day - YET it was not so severe or so distracting#that i was completely unable to get anything done. An orange day is if I was so sick or felt so bad#that I completed absolutely nothing that day because my primary focus was basically spending the entire day on whatever#was wrong with me or recovering from that. And a green day is a day that - even if maybe i had a few aches or pains - I was never any#noticable or distracting amount of sick - PLUS - i also got a reasonable amount of things done.#If I don't feel very sick yet I also lack the energy or mental wellness to complete daily tasks then it still counts as a yellow day.#So I guess like.. Yellow is if health was ok but focus was bad OR focus was okay but health was distracting. Green is BOTH focus and#health were mostly okay for a majority of the day with no major setbacks. And Orange is zero focus whatsoever because health is too bad.#There are also 5 categories. the worst is a super dark red and then best is a super bright green but I don't like using them#You have to select a bright red (x_x) emoji face to classify your day as dark red. and I dont like the implication of a 'dead' person face#because of my ocd lmao... it makes me afraid it's some habringer of death (if I select it for that day then somehting terrible will happen#the next day or whatever lol) *** *** *** - so I never use that one. I also feel like the MOST extreme categories should be reserved for#super extreme circumstance like.. I would only do a dark red day if I was literally hospitlaized or something. And same with the bright#green days like.. that would imply I guess that i was both suuuuper productive ANd had basically no symptoms at all all day. like a#Very Very Good day. and I just think that's not even possible. no day ever goes by without me feeling at least a little sick or achey at#SOME point lol... A day with NO headahces or issues or etc would be.... wow... mythical occurence..#I have definitely gotten worse as I got older but even at like 15 or 16 years old I used to take ibuprophen a ton (I dont anymore of course#for stomach reasons lol) and remember having various minor problems here and there I was bothered by a lot#AAANYWAY.. also I count 44 'bad' days ghb... that's losing like.. at least one entire month of time a year.. maybe this is why I have so mu#much trouble getting things done and finishing my projects. BUT thats the point and why I wanted to track that. to like.. see it all laid#out at the end of the year. Maybe I could even compare years. Even though I started late in 2023. It'd be interesting to have a#yearly record of how many good vs. bad vs. neutral days I had in any given year.#(app is called 'Moodflow' on android phones. in case anyone sees this and asks. though I cant vouch for it or any of the features or anythi#ng since.. again. i literally ONLY use the one single feature of rating calendar days. I look at nothing else on there. And I keep my data#off and phone in airplane mode basically at all times so I never get ads on apps. Sometimes i'll mention liking some puzzle game or somethi#and then someone else is like 'yeah i love it but OMG so many ads' and I'm just like.. yeagh.... not for me lol.. but sorry to you. that#sounds annoying certainly..) ANYWAY.. auuugh... a sea of yellow neutrality. better than a sea of orange though. so :'3c
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as of today i've played every persona game yayyy
#shitpost#arena and ultimax were the two i took longest to do. lol#arena i started YEARS ago but my copy on the xbox would always hardcrash?#i even redownloaded to the same effect so. something was fucking wrong lol#so i never managed to finish arena before but i played a lot of it#and so i never GOT to ultimax until now. so. all done with both#(i haven't reread all the arena stuff but the paths i didnt finish are...ones i finished when i tried on my xbox)#(whereas now im playing on switch)#also ive replayed several of the persona games. just. took me awhile here to finish them all#the only one i wouldn't replay is p1 probably.#i played through it once and thats enough for me. lol.#i uh. ignored the mechanics until the final boss and just shot everything to death with bullets. and let mark die so much im sorry mark#a fight would start and he was just going down. his gun was not good.#anyways. ofc this is true EXCEPT tactica just came out and im not buying it yet.#for xmas i'll probably get either tactica or lies of p. not sure which#i'll nab tactica eventually i just don't want to rn.#which is weird b/c i usually do buy atlas games new. idk. i dont want to rn.#anyways. im probably replaying pq and pq2 next. then maybe p4dan i dunno
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I think I’m gonna play Rivulet next now that I am completely disregarding unlock order. Also does anyone know if there’s a setting or mod or anything that would make Hunter’s slag keys harder to lose? Because I keep starting Hunter and immediately losing the keys to accidental throws or getting grabbed. I know key items respawn in the room they disappeared in next cycle but it keeps happening in stupidly dangerous spots that I can’t get back to without dying. I’m bad at video games if you couldn’t tell
#(guy who has several mods to cheat death because they cannot parkour for the life of them)#ok I say several but there’s only three. ones mouse drag so if I get grabbed by something and it drops me but I’m dead I can revive myself#(alternatively if I haven’t saved in a while I have just thrown the thing killing me until I’m freed a few times)#(might get that one ‘keyspam to get dropped’ mod to replace that strat tho)#second is wormgrass immunity. because I suck at riding rain deer I can never seem to grab their antlers. I just follow the deer directly#underneath them to get the same experience but at my (low) skill level lmao#and lastly when I’m doing big jumps I turn dev tools on and hover my mouse over solid ground past the jump so if I fall I can quickly#teleport to mouse and save myself. because frankly I just suck at parkour and don’t want to get stuck because of that#(past garbage wastes I totally did mouse drag revive myself a few times after just barely hitting the toxic water)#also I have a mod that makes sluppies immune to (almost) every form of death so I don’t have to worry about my kids. except if they get#grabbed and taken to a den they are very dead. which is the main cause of death I got the mod to prevent. lol. lmao even#zoracontent
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guys this "keeping myself busy with distractions so I don't get sad" thing isn't working
#my mom is basically scrubbing the house of all traces of her bc thats how she copes. thats what she did when dad died#like two days later she was cleaning out all his medical equipment and stuff#i guess thats a way of dealing with it :( just doesnt really work for me because it makes me feel their absence even harder#like for me i personally wanted to keep Dad's stuff around for a while because. idk i guess it just felt like he was still kind of there#in a way. i guess. i dunno#obviously losing a pet is easier to deal with than losing a parent but it still blows dude i hate this#(* a parent that you had a good relationship with. i know that im very fortunate in that regard. not everyone had that and i need to count#my blessings)#idk this feels harder than losing my childhood dog because jojo was basically my constant companion for the past several years#after dad died i got suicidally depressed and didnt leave the house and was unemployed for a good chunk of time and she kept me company#taking her for walks and hikes was the only thing i enjoyed doing and the only thing that got me out of the house. she was always there#(also there's probably some psychological component to the fact that we adopted her specifically to be a companion for dad#when he was wheelchair-bound and couldnt go anywhere. so she kept him company. and then after he died she did the same for me#so. idk. like.... i feel like theres something there lol)#mia.txt#animal death
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So. That NG++ ending, huh?
God what a fight
#armored core 6#i got so close to winning several times lol. usually ended up being staggered to death on final phase but i got it in the end#the fucking credits music too :’) and here i was thinking we werent gonna get some [redacted]
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Fuck this fuck you *undertales your satsuten*
#zack gets therapy from a bunch of monsters#and a small dead child#who finds the whole situation very funny#but has no idea whats going on at the same time#“damn bro you killed so many people how are people not noticing”#the answer is i paid gaster to remove his LV bc im a bitch#also he lost his old hoodie bc he got shot#several times#toriel was very concerned#he got adopted by a goat#dont judge him#angels of death#undertale#undertale au#satsutale#angels of the underground#au names lol
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To make the QRTs worse on that Mine vid, one of them is from a subreddit user I see frequently. He’s been complaining about not getting a constant stream of news about Gaiden and 8, I’m pretty sure I remember him being strongly against the characters being seen as queer, so on and so forth. I think RGG should bring back Mine and make him wear a big rainbow with sparkles
Imagine My Shock
#asks#anonymous#i could just TELL it made it to those circles#so. disappointed but not surprised#AND I WANT GAIDEN AND 8 NEWS INJECTED INTO MY VEINS AS MUCH AS THE NEXT GUY BUT#it's because we know hardly anything about gaiden. even less than 8. and the cryptic comments about 8 drive me insane lol#and they're designed to!#so i can't be too mad. for now. at rggs anyway#really though there were several. contingents. of people responding to the tweet#of course you have the redditors and fuck em i deliberately don't share anything there. but there is crossover with other subcategories#you've got the people who can't stand him and Vow to make sure he stays dead. somehow#you've got the whataboutism adherents whining about this and that other character as if this wouldn't be a great sign for EVERYONE#you've got the people who hate the fact that people who are supposed to be dead are being brought back period#even though this has literally been happening for 14 years and nothing's confirmed. you just hate ylad specifically. opinion discarded#you've got the people who actually like mine but don't want him back because of... reasons?#because his story is better as-is? because it was So Meaningful? ok#you've got the fifty thousand rubber concrete jokes like for the love of god it's not that funny it's just not that funny#speaking of overused jokes you've got the non-east asians making fun of his accent die 1000 deaths#you've got the one or two people insulting nakamura over this die 1000 deaths as well#and then... once you've crossed all the circles of hell... finally you have people who are neutral. happy even. about the news#oh and you have devilleon who stole my content lmao#but anyway yeah. mine SHOULD come back fruitier than ever actually#speaking of i actually have a pride month piece cooking this year for once...#LITERALLY JUST DUMPING ALL MY GRIEVANCES IN THE TAGS UNPROMPTED SORRY <333
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so i started reading the secret history 👀
dude. get ready for all the pretentiousness and questionable actions taken by morally grey characters and doing shit for the Aesthetic™ ajdhkfjalfhsll
#im in Love with tsh#dont wanna exaggerate or anything but it has shaped me into the person i am today#in the sense that several quotes from it float around in my head on the daily#effectively distracting me from tasks i have to finish :)#sure itd be cool to actually get shit done but also. death is the mother of beauty and beauty is terror#ever think about that ?#gods i need a reread#also feel free to like talk about it in my askbox or whatever bc i do not have enough conversations about it#with people that have experienced it#that's right tsh isn't a book it's a whole ass experience#amen#moot tag :P#remi's askbox#tsh#makes me crazy#also these tags got long for no reason at all lol
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Thinking abt my dupes some more, and it's such a joy imagining them working together to try and invent new stuff for their needs with their limited resources, especially when it comes to the guys anywhere but the main colony where the only actual scientist lives lol
#rat rambles#oni posting#tbf there is a doctor on one of the other colonies so its a good thing mi-ma has her at least#just the crew all learning to genuinely create for the first time and being estatic as someone makes a toaster or smth for the first time#and then they realize they can fuck around with food too and chefs have to swat everyone away from the stove to hog the creative joys#meanwhile the diggers are just staring with big sad eyes at the engineers and burt begging them to upgrade their mining guns#they wanna have fun with new things too!!! please somehow invent a neutronium blaster that the poor sad diggers can have fun with#meanwhile burt is just sitting there experiencing The Horrors (digging through olivia's database)#well ok several dupes are going through their own personal horrors since theyve yet to reinvent therapy 😔#a good chunk of them are going through the horrors of their primary food source being raw lettus lol#hey this is future them I can imagine theyve been sent duskcaps and pufts and have managed to enjoy a wider diet#and that the main colony have been getting to leech off of the stuffed berries from their teleporter neighbors#the fourth colony I forgot abt when drawing the last drawing have been thriving off of grubberry pie for ages tho theyre living lavish#yes colonizing that planet was an ordeal since its the flipped asteroid but its ok because they survived#and by they I mostly mean quinn they were rly the only one who ever was at risk#just another near death experience to add to their list (most of them were radiation related lol)#that's what happens when you adamantly refuse to use athmo suits and proper radiation shielding while doing space travel#oh also lets imagine that they all eventually got propper spoms set up and cleaned up the hydrogen floating around literally everywhere#and that I fixed my power problems by using the natural gas vents that were very easily available to me#and lets also imagine they managed to set up proper cooling systems and disenfecting systems as well#anyways I need to go shower while I continue to think abt my lovely dupes
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