#i hate the whole workplace thing Except for my fictional characters

[second-hand-heaven]

so who's going to tell Rebecca that Richmond is her family???

[thevindicativevordan]

On Supergirl

Figured I should put up my thoughts about Kara in the wake of her first film appearance being announced, and the final season of her TV show fast approaching. Short version is: Kara is very cool and DC needs to stop messing with her. 

My Introduction to Kara

I was introduced to Kara the way most millennials/Gen Zers were I imagine, via the Loeb Superman/Batman arc which brought the traditional Kara Zor-El Supergirl take into Post-Crisis continuity, after years of DC attempting to have a “Supergirl” without violating the editorial mandate that Kal needed to be the literal “Last Son of Krypton” (an example of one of the dumb ways DC fucked Kara over). Story goes that one day Dan Didio was in line at the Superman ride at Six Flags (I love that ride even though it’s stolen my glasses every time I’ve ridden it, even when I left them in a locker!). The ride had signs that talked about various Superman characters. Didio was reading the entry for Supergirl where it talked about her not being Clark’s cousin but instead some weird merge of alien shapeshifter, angel, and human girl, and he realized how fucking stupid that was, and he went back to the office and told Loeb to bring Kara back. 

Years later I would also be standing in line at the Six Flags Superman ride (probably at a different park location but who knows?) as a youngster and would read the new Supergirl sign that trumpeted that Superman had a cousin who shared all his powers, an update reflecting the new Loeb origin. I thought she sounded pretty cool, made a note to see if my library had any Supergirl stories next time I visited, then got on the Superman ride and promptly lost my glasses like an idiot because I wanted to take them off while I was riding and pretend I was changing from my “disguise” into Superman mid flight. My dad grounded me for this afterwards, but it gave me a funny story to tell at family get togethers and isn’t that what Six Flags is all about?

A month later (and with spiffy new glasses), my mom dropped me off at a new library next to where she worked, and they had one of the best Superman collections I’ve ever seen to this day. I was in heaven and while reading every Superman book I could find (I couldn’t check them out because I didn’t have a card, my mom’s card didn’t cover the area the library was in, and my mom wouldn’t have checked them out anyway since comics were “too violent”), I found the trade collecting Kara’s new origin. I read it and I thought both she and Superman were really cool, and Batman was a  punk who had to beat Darkseid by cheating, the loser. Turner’s art to my young eyes was the best I had ever seen, and the panels got engraved into my brain. 

I still get downright nostalgic whenever I see Turner Superman or Supergirl stuff. I also got my parents to rent the animated movie adaption of the Superman/Batman arc from Blockbuster (remember those?), and that sealed the deal. Seeing Kara hold her own against Darkseid convinced me she was as cool as her cousin. Next time my mom dropped me off at the library next to her workplace, I went looking for Supergirl stuff to read. I found the first volume of her new volume by Joe Kelly taking place after the Loeb arc and dove in.

It was... weird. 5 years later I might have enjoyed it but at the time I was majorly put off. Kara took a secret identity for a day and then ditched it because it was “stupid” and the kids bullied her. She was always getting into fights with Kal, and there was this weird plot that I couldn’t follow about how her dad had sent her to kill Kal, maybe or maybe not? Also she could grow crystals which I thought was dumb, and said she was stronger than her cousin which I couldn’t buy for a second given he looked like he was carved out of marble, and she looked like she relied on sunlight instead of food. I put the volume back on the shelf and kinda gave up on reading the character after that for a while. 

I followed her via the DC wiki updates just like I did Superman, and everything I read seemed dumb and convoluted. She was split in two, moped around a lot, made out with an alternate version of her cousin, and basically just flopped about the same way the rest of the Superfamily did during the 00s. Nothing made me think I had made a mistake dropping Kara until I read the latest update to her wiki page.

I was super into what I was reading about the Busiek/Johns era of Superman online. Lex was back and making a big revenge scheme that involved all the other Rogues! Old Superman Rogues were getting revamped and made cool again! Johns reintroduced Brainiac and made him a big threat, with Kal and Kara teaming up to fight him! Busiek was revamping Prankster and telling big ambitious Superman stories! For the first time in a long while, the consensus on the Internet was that Superman was good again. My “home” library had zero Marvel books and no Superman or Batman books, all their DC stuff was Flash or Green Lantern, mainly written by Johns. Insane to think back on now. My hopes that because Johns was involved with Superman, Superman books would show up at my library were fulfilled. They started bringing in Busiek and Johns collections, and someone there also ordered Sterling Gates’ first volume of Supergirl, and I checked everything out since I was old enough to have my own library card, and my parents were worried more about the violent video games I was playing rather than comics.

I read everything and loved it. I also really liked Gates’ take on Kara. She was still an imperfect teenager but she wasn’t insufferably angsty or constantly fighting with Kal. She was going to give the secret identity another try and Lana had “adopted” her. It’s funny remembering how I enjoyed all that given my current thoughts on how Kara should work, but it was great at the time. I liked Gates introducing new foes for Kara, some classic Superman Rogues adapted for her like Bizzarogirl, others crafted specifically for her like Reactron. Gates’ basically rekindled my enjoyment of Kara the same way Busiek & Johns rekindled my enjoyment of Superman.

Of course it ended terribly like everything Superman-related seems to.

I’ve got a whole post I want to do about New Krypton and what came after. In short that is the most blatant example of “hitting the reset button” that I’ve ever seen. All the potential got wasted, and afterwards everything except Lex’s Action Comics stuff just didn’t appeal to me. Gates got booted off Kara for Nick Spencer who ended up leaving himself later, a promising Teen Titans line-up with Kara on it didn’t happen, and the last proper Pre-Flashpoint Superfamily story was a crappy team-up with Doomsday against Bigger Doomsday (thank God for Cornell’s final Luthor/Superman confrontation at least). When news of the reboot arrived, I was honestly happy. The Superline needed an enema.

Controversial opinion time: I liked New 52 Supergirl. It’s weird because a lot of the stuff I hated about Kelly’s run was here, and a lot of the stuff I loved about the Gates’ run was not. This was angry, moody, emotional Kara again, fighting with Kal and not fond of Earth. But I was in my teens at this point, and I didn’t want happy go-lucky Superman or Supergirl. I wanted my heroes angry, scared of the future, ready to go out there and smash some cars. Morrison’s Action Comics was 100% my jam (still is once I really understood the deeper meaning beneath the work) and this Kara felt like a natural fit for this universe. Plus we got Asrar on art and that guy made it damn pretty to look at, lots of cool science fiction stuff going on, even with the dumb H’el storyline.

I loved all the new Rogues Kara got. I loved her new Fortress under the ocean. I loved how traumatized she was by the loss of Krypton, that she wanted more than anything to go home, that her cousin was like a stranger to her since they had been apart for so long. I found all of that incredibly relatable. A lot of the New 52 Supergirl stories might have been schlock but it was my type of schlock damnit, and I enjoyed it!

I kept with her New 52 series all the way through the Red Daughter Saga (which I loved). As someone who grew up on Johns GL (since that was the only comics my home library had), seeing a Supercharacter join a Lantern Corp was the hypest thing ever. I loved the finale about Kara finally letting go of her anger and losing the ring while smashing her foe into the sun, it was incredibly cathartic for me as an angry teen myself. I finally stopped following her series sometime after since I was no longer enjoying the Superline or really DC as a whole. It wasn’t until I heard that New 52 Superman died and the “old” Superman was back, that I checked back into DC.

DC Rebirth & How I Think Kara Should Work

I did not enjoy Supergirl Rebirth, and I think I’ll talk about my problems with it alongside how I think Kara as a character should work since the two are related. A pet peeve of mine that has formed over the years is this: I don’t like it when Superfamily members get turned into Clark clones. Kon wearing glasses and going to Smallville High. Kara going to high school and being involved in journalism. Jon more or less being written as a copy of his dad personality-wise. I hate that kind of stuff because it’s boring. What’s the point of a Superfamily if everyone is just copying Clark? It also doesn’t fit the characters especially in Kara’s case. Why the hell does she want to be a journalist? Were there journalists on Krypton? I don’t remember ever seeing one! Shouldn’t she want to be, I dunno, a scientist? That seems to have been the El family tradition, wouldn’t she have been groomed for that?

This one-off by Shea is honestly the only acceptable outcome for Kara going into journalism for me. She realizes she’s just copying her cousin and switches to something she wants to do. So Orlando copying the show, which already basically turned Kara into an expy of her cousin, just did not appeal to me at all. What had worked for me under Gates way back when was not clicking for me this time. I wanted to see Kara embody the principles of the S-shield in a different way than her cousin did. So I really enjoyed when Rebirth ended and we moved into the Bendis era with Andrekyo relaunching the title as Kara in space.

Kara in space has always felt like a good fit for me. Unlike Kal I’ve come to believe that Kara really shouldn’t be all that fond of Earth. For him it’s home, but for her it’s just where she ended up after her real home got destroyed. I think Kara works well as a sort of nomad, occasionally making stops back home to Earth to check on her cousin, but otherwise? She’s more comfortable out in space than she could ever be on Earth. Out in space she can be Kryptonian (which is what she should think of herself as in contrast to Clark being torn between his Kryptonian biology and human upbringing, and Jon/Kon identifying as human), be her true self, not have to pretend to be human to fit in. Kara founding a moon refuge was one of the best ideas for her that I’ve seen, I would love if DC made her Future State refugee center on the moon canon. I’m excited for more Kara adventures in space with the upcoming Tom King story.

Also love that her and Krypto are getting tied together, if they don’t want to use Krypto in Superman’s stuff, let her have him! Bring on cosmic adventurer Supergirl!

Personality & Other Traits

Kara to me should be more hot-tempered than her cousin. All the Superfamily members should have a temper in my opinion, I see that as the “Deadly Sin” of Superman and his family. But while Kal is like a simmering pot that will explode if it’s left cooking for too long, Kara is like dynamite. Light her fuse at your own peril because she will go off on you.

I also like the idea of Kara being rash. Kal’s got a maturity that came from over a decade of having to live with Lex Luthor constantly getting away with all his evil schemes. He’s patient because he’s been forced to be. Kara? If you ask for her help she’ll give it, but beware because she doesn’t really care about the long term impacts of her decisions. She’s an invulnerable teenager after all.

Really liked that Venditti Annual where Kara got tutored in history by a reincarnation of Hawkman. Kara having a passion for history is a neat trait, would be nice to see her teach Kal or Jon some Kryptonian lore, or have her lead a Kryptonian holiday celebration for the Superfamily because she’s the only one who remembers how to do it. 

Sexuality wise I know a lot of people ship Kara and Lena on account of the chemistry between the two in the show. I haven’t watched the show myself but I’m fine with making Kara bisexual, the Superfamily could use some LGBT+ rep, and Lena hasn’t done anything of worth as a villain, so undo that and throw the two together. If we’re letting Harley and Ivy get away with murder I think we can let Lena off the hook too, undo the Ultrawoman weirdness and put the two together. Could be fun seeing the two building that moon refuge together.

All in all I think Kara is a great character who is a stronger embodiment of the immigrant experience than even her cousin in some ways. I hope King does a good job with her, she’s treated better than her cousin on the film side, and that overall the 20s are a better decade for Supergirl than the 10s were.

[safflowerseason]

I was wondering, finding tweets about the petition to have Anna Chlumsky and Reid Scott act opposite each other in a romcom, how do you think that besides any version of comedy show or film, that these two could star in a romance drama? Something sort of as heavy as the narrative and aura of Normal People, or another dark comedy like Fleabag - except has better writing until the ending unlike Veep? I keep trying to picture them away from playing characters with political careers; and mostly what I can imagine is them in an indie film about struggling in an already long time marriage, with the story tackling issues of depression, etc. but then it's just like playing Dan and Amy minus working for the White House. I honestly just need someone to erase their canon ending in Veep ):

Very sorry for the TLDR, but I think I'm never moving on from Dan Egan and Amy Brookheimer, so I just wanted to know your thoughts about this as one of the best fan-fiction writers out there with this ship.

Thank you!

Hi! Thank you so much for the Dan/Amy question...I haven't gotten one of those in far too long! And thank you especially for the super nice words about my writing.

First of all - there is an actual petition for Anna Chlumsky and Reid Scott to act opposite on one another in a romantic comedy? Where is this petition? Change.org?

More seriously, to your very interesting question, I do think it's worth pointing out the distinction between the actors themselves in a romantic drama and the characters of Dan and Amy. Do you want Reid Scott and Anna Chlumsky acting in characters similar to Dan and Amy, or do you just want to see them in anything romantic regardless of character? (ie, a Normal People-esque drama) As for RS and AC as actors, I actually haven't seen a whole lot of their work outside of Veep, so I don't have a super thoughtful take on whether or not I think they would be interesting to watch in some super serious, reflective drama. Like, I guess I can imagine it? I have to admit I didn't really like Normal People...I tried to watch the first few episodes and was bored out of my mind (existential angst and horniness are not an actual character traits on their own). It is admittedly hard for me to picture either actor in a series or film that requires as much silent looking and feeling as a Sally Rooney-esque romantic drama...I think both Chlumsky and Scott have particular energies as actors that are better suited to more "externalized" action. At the same time, it is easier for me to imagine Chlumsky in a strictly dramatic role as opposed to Scott, although I think with the right scene partner (like Chlumsky) he could do pretty well...their fight scene in 5.03 remains one of my favorite scenes in the show, and it's played completely seriously. But of course I could see the two of them acting together in a more typical love-hate romantic comedy, à la You've Got Mail or Ten Things I Hate About You. Or for something darker yet still technically romantic, a plot in the vein of You're the Worst, which I haven't seen but heard fantastic things about (and feels very appropriate for Dan and Amy).

As for Dan Egan and Amy Brookheimer *the characters*, Bring Me to Light and its universe is probably my answer to what kind of "dramatic" plot that I see as best suited to their particular relationship as outlined by the show in its first six seasons. While I hope BMTL is occasionally funny to read, it is fundamentally about the drama of Dan and Amy's relationship--but a drama that is deeply grounded in the everyday challenges of two dysfunctional people trying to maintain a functional relationship. The plot is really quite simple--Amy's dad dies, she and Dan are thrust into a bunch of emotionally charged-yet still typical and traditional social situations as a result, they fight about their relationship, and *vague spoiler alert* at some point they will make up. But I never even considered having Dan actually cheat on Amy, for example. Because of the way Veep constructed its interpersonal relationships in the first four years of the show, I've never found especially soapy personal drama very realistic to the characters. The biggest *gasp* moments in BMTL, in my opinion--not that there are really any gasp-worthy moments--have been due to the political/professional plot, not the personal.

As a result, I think the characters of Dan and Amy lend themselves especially well to workplace AUs, where they each have something else occupying their attention and motivation in addition to each other. As @thebookofmaev phrased it once, the key to both Dan and Amy is that they have something else they love just as much as they love one another--politics (and their careers). So in that sense, a plot that centralizes each character's endeavors beyond their personal lives would feel most like the Dan and Amy we encounter in the show.

I hope you found this answer as interesting as I found your question, Anon!

[destieltropecollection]

Destiel Trope Collection 2020 Day 10: Enemies to Lovers

It's a Match! | @suckerfordeansfreckles

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 2015 Main Tags/Warnings: pining, online dating, getting together Summary: Dean has seen the guy a handful of times, mostly at Charlie’s parties or when out and about with her — it’s only been six times that Dean is aware of, actually. Not that he counted. Well. He did, maybe, count a little. But that’s only because the guy is seriously gorgeous, and also seems to seriously hate Dean. Like, frowns and dark stares and leaving the room when Dean enters it. And that is most definitely the only reason why Dean keeps track of their meetings. It has nothing to do with the fact that, for whatever stupid reason, Dean feels all fuzzy and happy and warm around this stupid, scruffy, handsome, dark-haired and blue-eyed Cas-guy. Something about him just… does things to Dean’s head.

In The Ballroom | @gii-heylittleangel

Rating: General Word Count: 2594 Main Tags/Warnings: lovers to enemies to lovers, broken relationship, getting back together, false mentions of cheating Summary: The high school dance was useless in Castiel's opinion; there was nothing to do, people were incredibly annoying, and he would be alone. But, having Charlie Bradbury as his best friend, he had no choice but to go; after all, there was a tiny chance he would get tacos after the party. Castiel did not get tacos but he got something a lot better.

Ring a Bell for the Righteous Man | @pray4jensen

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 3003 Main Tags/Warnings: Enemies to Lovers, Royalty/Fantasy AU, Soul Bond, Marriage, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dubious Consent Summary: An hour passes and the prince doesn't bed him. Dean thinks that maybe the prince doesn't have any intention of doing it at all, and if that's the case, it'll be Dean who'll face the consequences. So, thumbing a finger down the length of Cas' wings, Dean taunts, ""I thought you promised Lord Alastair that I wouldn't be able to walk, your highness."" Dean pauses. ""Are you doubting yourself, my lord?""

Addicted | @verobatto-angelxhunter

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 3671 Main Tags/Warnings: Season 4/5 canon divergent, Destiel, slow burn, Badass! Castiel, first kiss, first time, explicit sexual content, canon typical violence. Summary: Dean can't get Castiel out of his mind. Everytime the angel is in front of him, is hypnotizing. He needs to know what is going on with him. Why Castiel is so irresistible? And why he feels that empty everytime the angel isn't near him.

the light of falling stars | @procasdeanating

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 4980 Main Tags/Warnings: Alien!Cas, wing fic, inspired by a movie (enemy mine) Summary: … when Lieutenant Dean Winchester and the two ships under his command engaged in combat with a Seraph squadron. Two army ships were destroyed, while one fighter, presumably Lt. Winchester’s, made a forced landing on a nearby uninhabited class D planet after triggering the emergency protocol. The ongoing search has not produced conclusive results. Lt. Winchester is classified as missing in action…

First Impressions | @suckerfordeansfreckles

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 7254 Main Tags/Warnings: hospital AU, ftm trans Cas, top surgery, mentions of medical stuff, sharing a room Summary: When Cas wakes for the first time after his surgery, there’s sunlight tentatively streaming through the window to his right. It takes him a while of uncoordinated blinking and thinking until he realizes where he is, why he’s here. And then the giddiness comes, sudden and overwhelming, when he looks down at his chest and there is none. The reality is almost too much to grasp and his hands shake a little when he tries to raise them to touch. He's happy, and giddy, and so thankful. And then a nurse wheels in his new roommate, one very obnoxious and flirty Mr. Winchester. Cas just... cannot wait to watch all of this play out.

The Galaxy's Most Wanted | @saltnhalo

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 10160 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Space Pirates, Enemies to Lovers, Blow Jobs, Frottage, Angry Sex, Sexual Tension Summary: Dean had been the one always up to mischief, running around with his father’s broken laser pistol and constantly getting into places he shouldn’t have been. Sam, in comparison, always seemed to be the smart, studious one – until he reprogrammed the AI in their neighbours’ house to play ‘Happy Birthday’ at the loudest possible volume while keeping all the doors and windows firmly locked. It had taken two experts seven hours to undo the coding that Sam had managed to integrate into the house’s programming. So, yes. They had been exceptional even from the beginning. And when John Winchester crossed one too many people, his sons inherited his beloved ship, and took to the cosmos doing what they knew best: stealing. And they were damn good at it too. Almost unrivalled, across their own galaxy and even those neighbouring. Almost.

Love Thy Enemy | @gii-heylittleangel

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 11887 Main Tags/Warnings: revenge planning, use of guns, major characters injury Summary: After being betrayed by the Men of Letters, Dean makes the most stupid, idiotic, and best decision of his life: ask Castiel Novak, his long time enemy, for help.

The Quest for the Demon King's Heart | @cr-noble-writes

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 12500 Main Tags/Warnings: fantasy au, demon king!dean, wood elf!cas, enemies to lovers, mutual pining, minor character death, major character injury, angry sex, angst with a happy ending Summary: In a fantasy land, Dean, the Demon King, goes to a distant guild to take a break from evil, where he meets a young adventurer, Castiel, on a quest to slay the Demon King. For fun, Dean helps and protects the adventurer, and affection grows between them. Then, they arrive at the gates of his castle.

A Virgin to Redeem the Billionaire | @notfunnydean

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 16660 Main Tags/Warnings: Manipulation, Emotional Manipulation, blackmailing someone into a relationship, Mentions of drug selling (not Destiel), Mentions of cheating (not Destiel), virgin!cas Summary: When Castiel meets Dean Winchester, the other man seems to be a real asshole. So it doesn’t surprise him, when Dean shows up again and this time blackmails Castiel in a horrible way. Castiel agrees to be his boyfriend, only to protect his family, but along the way he actually falls for Dean.

The Bakery | @dates-with-cas

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 41075 Main Tags/Warnings: angst with a happy ending, offscreen character death, enemies to lovers, workplace sex, semi-public sex, attempted rape/non-con, mentions of past sexual abuse, alcohol as a coping mechanism, sex as a coping mechanism, sex in a kitchen, unresolved past trauma, top!Cas, bottom!Dean Summary: Dean Winchester loves his job, and he's thrilled to have his boss' brother coming in to work over the holidays, that is until he meets Castiel Novak for himself. The man is picky, grouchy, and absolutely fucking gorgeous.

The Path Between the Stars | zaphodsgirl (AO3)

Rating: Mature Word Count: 53111 Main Tags/Warnings: AU - Labyrinth Fusion, Angst with a Happy Ending, Minor Character Death Summary: It's been almost fifteen years since Dean met the enigmatic goblin king, Castiel. After failing to complete the labyrinth with Sam to save baby Adam, Dean is forced to make a deal to secure their freedom. Five years ago he finally gave in to the feelings he’d been keeping at bay for some time, only for Castiel to disappear from his life completely without a word. When Dean relays the story of the labyrinth to Sam's girlfriend Eileen, an opportunity presents itself for him to get some answers...and maybe have a second chance at something he hadn't dared to believe was real.

Of Twists and Turns | @kitmistry

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 75080 Main Tags/Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Pirate AU, Implied Drug Use, Minor Character Death, Amputation, Sea Monsters, Hunter Dean Summary: When naval surgeon Castiel Novak is captured by the Black Impala pirates, he has no choice but to agree to their terms: He is to serve on their ship for a whole year before they release him. That doesn’t mean he is going to like it, though. Especially when their captain is the embodiment of everything Castiel despises. Determined to earn his freedom, Castiel settles into the life of an outlaw. When the pirates’ true goal is revealed, though, he can no longer deny that things are not as black and white as he thought they were. And he can’t deny how drawn he is to Captain Winchester either.

Sovereign | @pomegranatedaffodil

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 87974 Main Tags/Warnings: Arranged Marriage, Hate to Love, Fantasy AU, Royalty AU, Virgin Castiel, Switching, Slow Burn, Minor Injuries Summary: When his brother embarks on a risky venture, Prince Dean of Pellia’s only choice is to enter into a marriage with the king of Arxelle in order to save Sam’s life as well as his own. King Castiel is severe, aloof, and no more happy about their hasty wedding than Dean. Marital bliss is the last state either of them expects to reach, but as Dean spends more time in his new home, he and Castiel slowly begin to settle into a partnership that allows them to put the needs of their kingdom before their own feelings. The longer they spend together, though, the more those feelings develop, daring them both to wonder if they might ever be husbands in more than just name.

Shot Through The Heart | @peanutbutterjelly-pie

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 156327 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe, Men of Letters, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Humor, Case Fic, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Bottom Dean Summary: As a hunter Dean finds himself more often than not relying on the help of the Men of Letters. Most of the time that's not much of a problem - if it wasn't for Castiel, the smartass bookworm with the piercing blue eyes, the messy hair and the rude attitude. He's been an annoying thorn in Dean's side since day one - and the hunter doesn't see that change anytime soon.

[mediaevalmusereads]

When A Scot Ties the Knot. By Tessa Dare. New York: Avon Books, 2015.

Rating: 3/5 stars

Genre: historical romance

Part of a Series? Yes, Castles Ever After #3

Summary: On the cusp of her first London season, Miss Madeline Gracechurch was shyly pretty and talented with a drawing pencil, but hopelessly awkward with gentlemen. She was certain to be a dismal failure on the London marriage mart. So Maddie did what generations of shy, awkward young ladies have done: she invented a sweetheart. A Scottish sweetheart. One who was handsome and honorable and devoted to her, but conveniently never around. Maddie poured her heart into writing the imaginary Captain MacKenzie letter after letter … and by pretending to be devastated when he was (not really) killed in battle, she managed to avoid the pressures of London society entirely. Until years later, when this kilted Highland lover of her imaginings shows up in the flesh. The real Captain Logan MacKenzie arrives on her doorstep—handsome as anything, but not entirely honorable. He’s wounded, jaded, in possession of her letters… and ready to make good on every promise Maddie never expected to keep.

***Full review under the cut.***

Content Warnings: graphic sexual content, blood, violence

Overview: I came across this book while doing research for a blog post on Scottish fetishization in romance. While writing the post, I encountered YouTuber Jean Bookishthoughts’s video “ An Actual Scot Reads Highlander Romances,” and she gave this novel a fairly positive review. So I decided “why not? I’ve got nothing better to do.” Overall, the premise of this book was really enticing - the idea of a woman writing letters to a fictional sweetheart only to have a flesh-and-blood man show up at her door is quite the setup. I also think Dare does a good job of writing humor and moving the narrative along. But I ultimately couldn’t give this book more than 3 stars for a number of reasons: for one, the main crux of the plot felt like it could have been a bit more robust. Two, I didn’t find Logan to be a very interesting character. And three, some of the random “Highlander” references felt cheesy.

Writing: Dare writes prose that is quick, witty, and humorous. I very much enjoyed the jokes and the banter between our protagonists, and I appreciated that Dare didn’t get bogged down in some of the details of day-to-day life. If I had any criticisms, it would be that I think Dare moves almost too quickly at times. Some of the more emotional moments could have used some room to breathe or some more description of how the characters’ emotions are faring. But it wasn’t so bad that I felt like I was being rushed through the novel. Another way of putting is may be that sometimes Dare told where she could have shown, but the balance of telling vs showing didn’t feel egregiously off.

Plot: This plot mainly follows our heroine, Maddie, and our hero, Logan, as they try to work out an agreement. Maddie, in the attempt to avoid going on the marriage mart, invented a sweetheart at age 16 and wrote letters to a “fictional” Scottish captain in the army for years. Unbeknownst to her, the letters were actually being received by Logan, and when he and his men come home from the war, Logan is determined to marry Maddie in order to get her land in Invernesshire.

Personally, I found this setup to be quite intriguing and whimsical. I liked the embarrassment that arose from Maddie’s letters actually being received and read. I liked that Logan secretly looked forward to the letters from a stranger. I even liked the dilemma of negotiating a marriage of convenience. But I think where this plot fell apart for me was the whole challenge of consummating the marriage. Logan and Maddie agree to marry and live separate lives (it’s early on, so this isn’t really a spoiler), but Logan is adamant about consummating the marriage so that there’s no possibility of an annulment. Maddie, for her part, wants to avoid consummating the marriage because she finds that marriage will threaten her career prospects; as an illustrator, she finds that men will not hire her for work if they think household or parenting duties will interrupt her work schedule. To be completely honest, this challenge was quite good; I thought there was a real opportunity here for Dare to explore the sexist challenges women face in the workplace. Where I thought the challenge was weak was in the whole obsession with consummation. Unless there was such hostility between the Scottish and the English that an Englishwoman’s word would always be taken over a Scotsman’s, I found the question of “did they actually have sex or not” to be quite trivial. From what I know, annulments were notoriously difficult to obtain, so it wouldn’t matter much if Maddie and Logan had consummated the marriage. It seems like Logan could just say they did and an annulment would be near impossible. Nor do I think the law would care much if they only had non-penetrative sex. It seems like the whole plot hinging on whether or not they had “real sex” was a non-issue for me.

Instead, I would have liked to see more conflict in Maddie between balancing her desires for romance and a family with her career aspirations. Once Logan enters the picture, it seems like her career takes a backseat (except for a couple of scenes), and I would have rather seen it be more front and center. Either that or I think Maddie’s story could have mirrored her aunt’s more closely. Maddie’s Aunt Thea was long ago caught up in a scandal that ruined her, but later, Thea reveals that she had enjoyed the freedom. I think having Maddie be independent and struggle with the idea of being “tied down” by marriage could have also been good, and while there’s a little of that, I think it could have been more apparent to the reader.

In terms of small-scale narrative points, I think a lot of the scenes Dare writes are very funny and entertaining. I liked, for instance, the scene where Maddie falls into a bog, or when Maddie shows kindness to Logan’s friend, Grant. The scenes that truly did bother me, however, were some of the more “fluffy” ones that were a bit too cheesy for my tastes. For example, there’s a scene in which Maddie finds Logan reading Pride and Prejudice and he’s wearing spectacles. She makes a big deal about him being a reader and I had to roll my eyes. There’s also a scene towards the end in which Maddie attempts to make haggis, and I hated it because it felt like it was inserted so Dare could check off a “Scottishism” in a list. Tartan? Check. Brogue? Check. Haggis? Check. The scene also erupted in random violence, too, which felt out-of-place and inserted for pointless drama towards the end of the novel.

But I will admit, I did like the scenes that were very self-aware about what Dare was doing. For example, there’s a scene in which Logan is debating about what to do to get Maddie into bed. His friends give him suggestions like “offer your heart to her on a platter” or “throw in a lot of oochs and bonny lasses when you speak” or “dive into the loch and have her go looking for you. Then, when she’s found you, pretend you don’t notice her and have her watch you bathe for a while. Then emerge from the lock all dripping wet.” This self-awareness was a nice stab at romance cliches, though I wish Dare had done a better job herself at avoiding them.

Characters: Maddie, our heroine, is fairly likeable in that she’s bookish, generous, and a bit clumsy at times. I liked that there was a juxtaposition between her confidence and her social anxiety: while she wasn’t afraid to assert herself in some situations, big crowds made her nervous, and I think navigating those two scenarios made for some interesting characterization. The main thing I didn’t like about Maddie was how quickly she seemed to give up her career ambitions for Logan. There’s a point where she has to make a choice between letting Logan go and following her dreams, and she claims that she’s choosing Logan even though the choice is really made for her based on sexist norms of the day. I would have liked to see her wrestle with her ambitions a little more.

Logan, our hero, has some admirable qualities, but in the end, I found him rather uninteresting. He’s your basic roguish Scotsman with a tragic past, and though I liked the loyalty he showed to his men, I ultimately though he was a little too jealous and a little too used to his orders being obeyed. I would have liked to see him be a little less dictatorial so that his romantic appeal would shine through a bit more brightly.

Side characters are charming but, in my opinion, underutilized. I liked all of Logan’s army buddies and appreciated that all of them had disabilities in some way (and those disabilities were important but didn’t define them). I really appreciated Maddie’s relationship with Grant, the soldier whose memory resets every hour or so. She was kind to him and he was sweet to her; I just didn’t think his random violent outburst towards the end was necessary or in-character. Maddie’s Aunt Thea could have also been used more effectively, but I did like that Thea had this quirk of making a lot of cosmetics and remedies that were, ultimately, rubbish. It was charming.

Romance: Logan and Maddie’s romance was... ok. The premise started out really interesting, but over time, I lost some enthusiasm because I felt like I was being told that they had feelings for each other (rather than being shown). Sure, Logan does some things that challenge Maddie’s assumptions and vice versa, but I wanted them to have a stronger basis for a romance than just “they’re hot and I’m horny oh wait they were nice to me and aren’t exactly what I expected.” Part of the reason I wasn’t super enthused might also be the focus on sex and sexual attraction as well as Maddie feeling pity for Logan on account of his past. I prefer romances where the focus is on each person lifting the other up emotionally, and while there was a little of that, I think I would have liked to see it be more of a centerpiece within the plot.

TL;DR: When a Scot Ties the Knot is a funny, light, historical romance, but ultimately doesn’t have a “meaty” enough plot for my personal tastes. Some readers might enjoy the banter and the heroine’s determination, while others might be turned off by the cheesiness and lack of a complex hero.

[cordonian-literature]

The Aftermath - Ch. 7

Photographs

Summary: Gabe’s having a difficult time at school, and Olivia gets some suspicious information

Word Count: ~3.3k

Warning: Mention of character death

*All characters belong to Pixelberry, except those that are unique to my story (I’ve also used some characters and fictional instances from Donna Tartt’s “The Goldfinch”)*

Catch up here! 

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I hope I got everyone tagged! If I missed someone, or if anyone wants to be added/removed, let me know!

- Eleanor - 

Gabe and I go back to school on Monday. It was uneventful, but all of my friends were especially nice to me and my teacher told me that I didn’t have to worry about any of the work I missed. In the middle of math, the school counselor took me out of class and told me I could come and talk to her if there was anything I needed. I told her I was alright and walked back to my seat, feeling the eyes of the entire class on me.

Around noon, it was time for lunch. Grandma had packed our meals the night before. I took my lunch bag and started walking with my class to the cafeteria where we would eat. We passed by the main office, where I saw Gabe, sitting along the wall of the room with his backpack on the seat next to him. I ran up to my teacher and pointed out my brother, asking if I could sit with him for lunch. 

“That’s fine, Eleanor,” she allowed, “but make sure you come back to line up with us when the bell rings.”

I go into the main office, and the secretary smiles at me. I tell her that I was there to have lunch with my brother, and she nods. 

I sit down in the seat next to Gabe. Both of our classes had lunch right now, but it didn’t look like he had eaten. “Aren’t you hungry?” I ask him. 

He shakes his head. 

I take out my sandwich and start eating, glancing at Gabe to see if he would reach for his own lunch. When I was done with my sandwich, I threw out my wrapper in the trash next to the secretary’s desk and opened up Gabe’s backpack to take out his lunchbox. 

Mama and Daddy had bought us our lunchboxes when I started kindergarten. We found one with my name on it, and since we couldn’t find one with Gabe’s name on it, Daddy bought him the Avengers one and Mama later sewed his name on. 

Remembering Mama and Daddy together, when they were both alive and well, made me sad again. I had so far gone the whole day without feeling any hints of tears. Now, standing in the office, with Gabe not talking to me and the reminder that Mama and Daddy were both technically gone, I wanted to cry again. 

I forced myself not to. Instead I placed Gabe’s lunchbox on his lap. I had to show Gabe that everything was alright, and I couldn’t do that if I was crying. 

I start eating the cookies that Grandma packed me. I take out an Oreo and wave one in front of Gabe’s face, hoping that he would take it, but he just shakes his head. 

I put the rest of the cookies back into my bag, feeling weird about being the only person in the room eating — especially since I wasn’t even sure if we were allowed to eat in the main office — and then the secretary turns to me and asks, “Honey, what’s your grandmother’s phone number? I called her workplace and they wouldn’t put me through.”

I give her the number. Gabe continues to stare down at his lap. 

“Hi! Mrs. Brooks?” the secretary cries. “This is Miss Newman, Mr. Henderson’s secretary from Gabriel’s school? Yes I’m just calling to ask if you could pick him up? Oh, no he’s been an absolute angel! It’s just that, he had a nervous breakdown during science and disrupted the class.... Yes, he’s here in the office with me. Oh, you would like to speak to him? Sure!” She motions at Gabe to come over to her and take the phone, but he still hasn’t looked up from his lap. “Gabriel!” Miss Newman violently whispers. 

After a few more moments of her trying to get Gabe on the phone, she begins talking to Grandma again. 

“Gabriel’s not in too good of a mood right now. Principal Henderson asked me to call you. Yes, he spoke with him. No, he won’t be suspended, but we’re asking you to keep him home for a few more days until you’re sure he’s doing better. He’ll be home without consequences, yes. Oh, you’ll pick up Eleanor as well? Great! I’ll have her collect her things.” 

As soon as she hangs up, I nod at her and then walk out of the office, leaving my lunchbox with Gabe. I go to the cafeteria where my teacher is and tell her that I’m being picked up and need to go back into the class to get my things. Another teacher watches the class as I’m led back up to the classroom. I give my thanks to her for opening the door, and then dash back down towards the office.

When we get in Grandma’s car, Gabe’s head still hung low. I wanted to give him a hug, mostly because I wanted one, but I decided against it. 

We don’t talk during the drive, and we don’t talk on the elevator ride up. Once we’re inside our penthouse, Gabe goes towards his room, but Grandma calls him back. 

Gabe shrugs his bag off and falls back onto the couch, staring at his shoes. 

Grandma sighs. “Gabriel, Eleanor. I have something important I need to talk to you about.”

“Is it about what happened at school?” Gabriel mumbles.

Grandma sighs, but doesn’t answer. “Gabe, baby, do you remember where you and I went on Saturday after dropping off Ella for a ballet class?”

He nods. 

“Well, we went over there to get a test taken. To see if that man, Liam, was your father.”

“But...,” I say, frowning. Neither of them had told me where they had went. “Isn’t... Daddy Gabe’s father?”

Grandma ignores me. “The test came back positive, which means that Liam is your dad.”

“Both of our... dad?” Gabe and I look between each other and Grandma. My heart was racing. How could Liam be his father if we didn’t know who Liam was? And what about Daddy? Did suddenly not exist for Grandma?

“No, baby,” Grandma explains. “Your mother was with Liam before she was with Theodore, which means that Liam is your father, Gabe, and that Theodore is Ella’s father.”

“But... but...,” Gabe sits forward, panic and heavy tears in his eyes. “Does that mean... wait... Grandma do I have to go live with him?”

Grandma doesn’t answer, and Gabe starts crying. 

“I don’t wanna do that Grandma, I don’t wanna leave. I don’t wanna leave you and Ella, I don’t wanna leave Mom,” he pleads.

My breathing quickens. I don’t want Gabe to leave us either. If he was going to leave, then I’d have no more siblings to play around with, or tease, or cry with, or laugh with, or talk about my day with, or ask for help, or anything. I couldn’t do those things with Grandma or Mama. I would be alone.

Grandma rushes over to sit in between us and holds Gabe in her arms. “No, baby,” she whispers. “I’m not going to let that happen.” 

She does her best to soothe him. The power of his sobs increases and decreases. When Gabe’s tears subside and the only proof of him having cried were his whimpers, Grandma grabs both of our hands. 

“Come on, let’s go visit Mama.” We nod. “Do you want to know what the doctor told me?” We shake our heads. “She said that showing Mama pictures can help bring her memory back. Do you want to try that?” 

We jump up from our seats and race into Mama and Daddy’s room, where all the family albums were. There are three: one filled with pictures of specifically Gabe and I, another with pictures of Mama and Daddy (which is thinner than the other two), and the last one was filled with pictures of all of us together. 

On Mama’s side of the closet we find an empty beach bag, so we put the albums in there. There were some framed pictures in their room and on the walls, and so we took those, too. There were pictures of me, Gabe, and Mama in Daddy’s office, which we also gently placed in the bag. 

The bag was so heavy that Gabe and I had to carry it together. When we got to the hospital, Liam and his friends weren’t there. I wanted to tell Gabe that maybe it was important to try and look for him and talk to him, but him and Grandma were already ushering me into Mama’s hospital room. 

“Hello, there,” she says to us, smiling. 

“Hi, Mom,” Gabe greets, we put down the bag and stare at her for a couple moments. 

“I hear that you guys have some pictures to show me?” Her tone isn’t motherly or cheerful like it used to be. Instead it’s... friendly... but not really. Like when a stranger in the subway asks for directions, or when the cashier asks if you found everything you needed. She sounded like she was obligated to be nice to us, and didn’t really want to. I wanted to understand her feelings, I really did. I tried to remind myself that Mama didn’t know she was a Mama. 

I just wanted to leave everything be and disappear, to fade from existence the same way that Mama’s memories of us did. 

But if I faded from existence, what would happen to Gabe? If Mama never gets her memories back, then what else would keep him here? He would have to leave Grandma and Mama and go with Liam. He would have to go alone. Just as if he left, I would be alone. 

And I hated being alone or even thinking of it. Mama and Daddy were always close to us, so I couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to isolate myself from everyone. Even the word “isolation” made me think of how the police had told Grandma that they found Mama under a pile of rubble. Was Mama able to see before people pulled her out? If they didn’t pull her out, and she stayed there, and we never found her, and her name was never in the news, would she have technically existed? Would she have existed for the doctors and nurses and our family friends who sent her flowers? Would she have existed anymore for Liam and his friends?

Technically, she wouldn’t have. But right here, right now, she existed, Gabe existed, and so did I. We just had to remind her. 

I pull out the album filled with pictures of Gabe and I first, mentally marking us as the top priority. I walk over to one side of her bed and sit next to her. Gabe seems hesitant. He looks disconnected, just as he has the entire day. Now there’s a confusion mixed in with it, and I know it’s because of what Grandma told us about Liam. Gabe’s face represents all of the questions I have. 

Usually when he gets like that, I leave him be so I don’t accidentally make it worse. But this time is different. 

“Come on,” I call to him from Mama’s left side. 

“You can sit here, Gabriel,” Mama pats the right side of her bed, where there’s a space big enough for him to sit. 

My face falls a little when she calls him “Gabriel” instead of the sweet “Gabe”. The memories flash through my head, how Mama never referred to us as “Gabriel and Eleanor,” but always as “Gabe and Ella.” Her affectionate nicknames that caught on became a larger part of our identities than our actual names.  

But, still, it’s a step in the right direction. She’s trying to pull us towards her, which is better than leaving us on the side by ourselves. 

When Gabe sits down, I open the book up to his kindergarten graduation. She smiles and laughs at our stories, and for the first time during the longest, most helpless week of my life, I have hope that everything might just turn out okay.

- Olivia - 

Almost a week after Liam and Drake left for New York, a folder with pictures of them walking around Times Square was smacked down onto Olivia’s desk by her assistant and sidekick, Jacob. 

There were pictures of Liam, Drake, and Maxwell walking down a crowded street and into a store with stuffed animals. Olivia looks up at Jacob and asks, “Where did you get these pictures from?”

“Intercepted them in the capital this morning before they reached the palace.”

“Who in the palace would be trying to get pictures of the king?” Olivia wonders aloud. She suspected Madeleine, that good-for-nothing she-devil who never stopped delving into everyone else’s business with the intent of “making sure no one’s actions could embarrass Cordonia”. 

Liam and Drake hadn’t gotten back to Olivia since they had left to go find Riley. Olivia wanted to give Liam a call, but decided it was best to leave him alone. She already knew that nothing she could say would make him feel better. All of them knew that Riley was the only thing that could lift his mood. 

Olivia forced herself to understand that a long time ago. When Madeleine was no longer the Queen-to-be, Riley was nowhere to be found, and Liam was in need of a wife, Olivia did her best to hint towards them marrying. But Liam, in his state of heartbreak, didn’t notice Olivia, so she consoled herself that he would never be in love with her. It hurt, but pain wasn’t new to Olivia.

What she couldn’t accept was the fact that some commoner came in out of thin air and broke the only man Olivia had ever loved, and left just as she had arrived. Olivia made it her goal that not only would she do everything in her power as Duchess to make her king happy again, but she couldn’t wait to give Riley a piece of her mind as punishment for what she did to Liam. 

Yet as the years went on, the likeliness of them finding Riley began to decrease, and Olivia was almost desperate to get her back. Riley’s punishment be damned, Liam was going to lose himself.

She knew that having to bring back Riley after she had just been in an accident would be a challenge, but at least Liam would be more relaxed. At least there would be hope for a more secure government. 

But six days after she had sent them off to New York, she still hadn’t heard back from them. And seeing these images of them walking around the city without Riley was very concerning. Picking up her phone, she debates whether she should call Liam. Even though it was almost midnight in Lythikos, It would be around six in the evening in America. Would Liam, Drake, and Maxwell still be roaming or would they be with Riley?

She decided that calling Drake would be a bit better, considering that she could seriously use some entertainment. 

The line rings until finally his rugged voice goes, “Hello?”

“Drake. Where are you and Liam?” 

“My day was fine, thank you for asking. I hope you’re having a nice day, too, Olivia.”

She scoffs. “I don’t have time for pleasantries.” She pauses, listening closely to the song that was playing in Drake’s background. “Are you... watching a children’s show?”

“No!” he shouts. “We’re in a candy store. That’s just the... music they put on.”

“Shouldn’t you all be focusing on Riley instead of pleasing Maxwell’s sweet tooth?”

“For your information, we are technically focusing on Riley, and the candy isn’t for Maxwell. How’d you know he was with us, anyway?”

Olivia picks up a picture of Liam, Drake, and Maxwell inside a store with Maxwell holding up a stuffed animal at least two feet taller than him. “Just a hunch. If you’re not in there for Maxwell, then who are you getting candy for? Riley?” 

Drake doesn’t respond. She can hear him sigh, and then he finally says, “We found out that Riley has two kids. The older one is Liam’s.”

Olivia’s jaw goes slack. A moment later she breathes out the words, “Liam didn’t know, did he?” Olivia knew that the last thing Liam would ever be was a negligent or cold father — especially after they discovered what his own father had done to him and Riley. If Liam knew that he had a son, there was no way that he would have allowed such a distance to come between them for so long. But along with pity for Liam, a fire in her chest was lightened as well. How dare Riley keep Liam’s son from him?

“Nope. He didn’t. They took a paternity test to make sure. It came back positive this morning. So that conversation between Gabriel and Liam is going to happen eventually, and we thought it’d be better to surprise him and his sister with gifts. To think of it, Eleanor should be in that conversation, too.” She can tell Drake pulls the phone away from his ear, because his voice sounds distant when he yells, “Maxwell! Get some extra gummy worms for Eleanor!”

There’s a faint, “Got it!” from the other side. 

“Gabriel and Eleanor?” Olivia asks. “Are those the children’s names?”

“Yup.”

“Gabriel is suitable for the name of a prince. A strong name, part of Cordonia’s history as an honorable warrior.... But Eleanor? She isn’t Liam’s, is she?”

“No,” Drake answers. “Her dad’s name is Theodore Blaise. He died in the accident.”

“But Eleanor is also the name of Liam’s mother?”

Drake lowers his voice. “I know, I thought about that, too. That doesn’t seem like something Riley did without thinking. I wish we could ask her, though it’d be useless.” 

“Useless?” Olivia frowns. “Why wouldn’t she be able to tell you? Does she not want to talk to you?”

Drake sighs again. “She lost her memory.” 

“Oh,” Olivia states. She thinks to herself, A clean slate, huh? But she can’t bring herself to explain the sense of dread in her chest. Now what will happen between her and Liam? Will he give up on her? He wouldn’t, though. He’s not like that. He has a son with her. And a step-daughter. “Don’t get Eleanor gummy worms,” she speaks after a silence moment.

“What?” She can imagine the look of confusion on Drake’s face. 

“I said don’t get her gummy worms, get her gummy bears. Worms are sad. Bears are happy. Haven’t you heard that childish gummy bear song?”

“I’m surprised you’ve heard it, Olivia. But I disagree. Worms are for when you’re happy. Bears are for when you’re sad. She just lost her father and is probably still upset, and we’re here to try and make them happy. Cheer them up before a serious conversation, y’know?”

“Is that why you guys were in the toy store?” Olivia picks up the picture that shows the three men walking out of said store with shopping bags in their arms.

“Olivia, are you spying on us?” 

“No,” she states, “though I probably should be since you all aren’t bothering to tell me anything. Anyway, Jacob intercepted some photographs of you three going around stores in Times Square. The pictures were being sent to someone in the palace.” 

“Damnit,” Drake spits. “Who else knows that we’re in New York? Whatever. I’ll let Bastien know. In the meantime I think you should go over to the palace and check everything out. See if anything suspicious is happening.” 

“I’ll leave in the morning,” Olivia declares. “Oh, and Drake?”

“Yeah?”

She sighs. “Let me know if Riley’s condition improves. And tell Liam that I’ve been meaning to talk to him. It’s alright if he can’t, I know he’s got a lot on his plate, but... just....”

“Damn,” Drake comments. “Someone’s going soft. Was it the gummy bear song that did it?” 

Olivia scoffs and ends the call. 

[miss-m-calling]

Chocolate Box 2021 letter

Dear writer,

Hello and thank you for writing for me!

I’m Miss_M on AO3. For all requests, I am asking for fic.

My requests this year are: American Gods (TV), The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (TV), Starred Up (2013 movie), Witchblade (TV), and Бeсa ǀ Besa (TV)

General likes:

-pre-canon, canon, post-canon, canon-divergent, and missing-scene stories

-character-driven as well as plot-driven stories

-fics which mix humor and angst/serious business (when this fits the canon)

-characters at work and play

-group dynamics, family dynamics (including constructed families), professional partnerships, friendships, alliances, rivalries, intimate couples (new lovers/first times as well as long-term/established couples), UST-ridden couples who are not just UST-ridden but connected in other ways too

-irony, snark, humor, angst -- all arising from the characters rather than the plot crowbaring it in

-linear, non-linear, and 5+1 stories

-hopeful endings, happy endings, bittersweet endings, “everything is awful but you’re here and maybe I don’t entirely hate that” endings

-worldbuilding

-spiky characters who keep their jagged edges and spikiness in adversity as well as when their lives are going well, square-peg-in-round-hole characters, tough characters with (maybe not so well) hidden vulnerabilities, characters who are their own worst enemies, characters who manage to get over themselves when the occasion calls for it, characters with conflicting values which may or may not be reconciled/resolved, characters who treat each other with respect and as equals even if they hate/annoy/can’t stand/love to dislike each other, characters who may not be exactly friends and may well irritate one another but manage to rub along to get the job done and maybe even grow to care about one another (much to their surprise/reluctance/discomfort), characters who just cannot get along with each other or find common ground

-workplace stories (this can mean anything from an actual workplace/casefic/procedural setting to anything that revolves around the canon world in which the characters live) in which the characters get to be competent

Shippy and smutty likes:

-(where it fits the characters) banter

-competitiveness or antagonism shading into attraction (this tension need not be resolved)

-”oh god why did it have to be you what did I do to deserve this“

-”come here and say it to my face/do that again/kiss me, you motherfucker”

-bickering yet loving couples

-characters who are serious about their romantic interests

-characters who think they are much better at flirtation than they actually are

-characters forced to work together only to prove much more compatible than they initially assumed

-fics which mix an exploration of characters’ professional and everyday lives with shipping

-characters who are incompatible in some important way (they are ideological enemies, cop and criminal, spies from opposite sides, or there has been betrayal!!!), and while they love and/or want each other, they’re not willing to change sides or abandon/compromise their identity/beliefs for the other’s benefit

-I don’t know how better to phrase this than: smut which fits the characters; how does their canon dynamics spill over into hubba hubba stuff?

-sexual scenarios that subvert expectations a little and surprise the characters themselves

-sexual scenarios that contain an element of competition or antagonism

-"this is a bad idea but we’re going for it hammer and tongs”

-not wanting to admit feelings or show vulnerability except oops it happens anyway, whether the characters acknowledge it or not

-characters getting way more into the sex or being more affected by it than they thought they would

-quick and intense sex, slow and intense sex, rough yet willing sex (when it fits the characters), unexpectedly emotional and/or tender sex

-masturbation while thinking of the other half of the ship (or not wanting to think about them only oops there they are in the fantasy!)

-first time sex

-established relationship, we-know-each-other-so-well sex

-”we’ve both wanted this and now we both know it so here we go diving in headfirst” sex

-for het and/or slash, oral, vaginal, anal incl. pegging, manual (ifyouknowwhatImean) -- all is good. You can go as veiled or as explicit as you like, but please avoid excessive medical jargon – I don’t find a lot of mention of “penis” or “clit” sexy.

Ship/smut DNWs:

MPREG, A/B/O, knotting D/s, formalized BDSM, painful sex, hard kinks (holding someone down playfully, hair pulling and such like, the odd spank are a-OK) scat, watersports knife/gun/blood play incest deaging/infantilization, mommy/daddy kink under-16yos in sexual situations humiliation body distortion/horror (feeding/weight kink, come inflation, vore, etc.) unrequested ships/pairings soulmates and soul marks pregnancy and children (can be mentioned if canon, just don’t make the whole fic about them) wedding setting/theme secondary characters shipping the main pair like it’s their job xeno, tentacles, bestiality noncon/dubcon

Other DNWs:

torture and abuse (this and noncon/dubcon can be mentioned, but please don’t dwell on it in loving detail or subject any of my requested characters to it) descriptions of vomit, shit, and piss (”He pissed up against a tree” and the like is fine), toilet humor lots of gore/blood (mention it, yes; lovingly describe it, no), cannibalism, serious illness or injury character bashing genderswap/genderbent characters, characters as kids/young teens issuefic, gender/sexuality/race/ethnicity/religion/ability/identity headcanons death of requested characters hopeless, unrelenting gloom/angst/horror RL holiday setting/theme, RL religions as a major theme (invented fictional holidays and rituals are fine) reference to RL current events 1st and 2nd person POV unrequested crossovers or fusions AUs which have nothing to do with canon fic written in lapslock

FANDOMS:

American Gods (TV)

Laura Moon/Mad Sweeney

I ship it. Yes I do. They had me at “gimme-my-coin-dead-wife”-flicks-him-into-wall. The snarky road trip was the best thing I never knew I wanted until it happened, and I adored every second of it, not to mention the upped shippiness in S2. They’re both such assholes and so fascinating, even if they start to mellow toward each other a bit, and all the gods/magic/resurrection stuff swirling around them begs to be explored further. Also I love love love how their dynamic is about equal parts spikiness, pathos, and humor (they’re funny! and the canon doesn’t shy away from putting them in ludicrous situations), and it weaves seamlessly between those three. Plus she’s half his size yet can and does beat him up with literally one finger, and then there’s the angst of he having killed her, feeling really guilty about it, and then bringing her back. And the way that their New Orleans adventure makes clear they have feelings for each other but neither wants to admit it. And and and… yeah, I just love them.

Even if some of my prompts are about stuff that’s addressed or hinted at in canon, feel free to diverge – canon divergences and canon-adjacent stories are my jam, as are missing scenes and post-canon stories! Also, I’ve read the book, so feel free to riff on that if you want.

Canon-specific DNWs: Laura as Essie or Sweeney's wife's reincarnation/descendant or lots of comparing her to them, Sweeney staying dead, any S3 spoilers.

Exception to blanket DNW about blood/gore/bodily fluids: describing the physical decay of the living undead (undead? there but for the grace of magic coins dead?) is fine!

Prompts:

-Laura discovers (how? you decide!) that Sweeney gave her back the coin after their accident – whatever happens next, some punching may be involved.

-Wednesday’s big war finally comes, and “don’t you dare die on me [again], you asshole” is a line either Sweeney or Laura (or both) might say to each other.

-Laura asked “What does Wednesday have to lose?” and the answer is…? (Yes, give me that sweet poetic justice. One possibility, though not remotely the only one, but as of S2E3 Laura is technically a god-killer...) Or later when she straight-up says she’s going to kill Wednesday, but is warned to bring power with her when she does, how does that work? How else might she damage Wednesday or ruin his plans, just in case she can’t actually kill him?

-At the end of S2, Laura hoists Sweeney’s dead body over her shoulders and strides off, seemingly leaving Cairo, Shadow, and all of it behind. Tell me what happens then – does she use Baron Samedi’s potion to bring him back, and whose is the blood filled with love she uses (does she still bleed? You could get creative here, worldbuilding is also my jam)? Does her/his coin play a part – and how come the coin still “powers” Laura despite Sweeney’s death? Does she bring him back another way, maybe figuring out how to keep herself around and be able to give Sweeney back his coin? Does he come back like she did, more undead than alive, or does his godhead, however depleted, help with that? That still leaves Laura to be fully resurrected too… Or does something completely out of left field happen – surprise me!

-Possible divergences from “Treasure of the Sun”: Sweeney manages to kill Wednesday, and then Laura rolls up, and then…? Or Laura rolls up and makes like Mama-Ji told her – destroys some motherfuckers? Or Sweeney gets killed temporarily but Laura brings him back, or brings herself back, or does something else with the Baron’s potion, and is Sweeney’s blood the one filled with love, or can we interpret voodoo spells in a non-literal way? Or what happens with Gungnir hidden in Sweeney’s hoard? And definitely how do they deal with each other once they meet up in Cairo, given how they parted in New Orleans?

-Or how about a wild divergence from the last several episodes of S2? Sweeney and Laura manage to settle their differences (ahem, more fucking, on this plane of reality, might help) and don’t part ways before leaving NOLA. Or they roll up in Cairo separately but at the same time, and confront Wednesday together, and neither of them die (or die more, in her case). Or they’re there together when the police nearly raid the house. Or they have Wednesday (the ultimate cause of Laura’s death) and Ibis (a death deity) and Bilquis (a love/death/life deity) on hand, surely they can concoct some kind of resurrection thingamajig for Laura, and if they have to twist some divine arms then so be it. Or or or…?

-Wednesday told that luckless cop that Sweeney had been against the big gods’ war from the start, and while Wednesday lies, what if Sweeney decided much sooner to say to hell with Grimnir and his war and his having Sweeney kill random people? I’m guessing Sweeney too drank three glasses of mead so he can’t back out without dire consequence – but he does have a fierce, dead woman in his corner.

-They go to some as-yet-unnamed old god (feel free to bring in whatever mythology you want) in order to bring Laura back to life. Between Sweeney’s mouth and temper, and Laura’s mouth and temper, it doesn’t go well. Now one or both of them are in big magical trouble with a pissed-off deity and have to get themselves/each other out of it. Speaking of other deities, I really enjoyed their brief canon interactions with Ostara, Anansi, and Mama-Ji, and I’d like to see more of that, especially Ostara’s polite yet over-it attitude, Anansi very obvious over-it attitude and his dramatic flair, or Mama-Ji being one of the few capable of giving Laura pause.

-All the petty, ridiculous ways in which Sweeney’s bad luck manifests itself make me laugh (can’t help it, won’t even try), and I’m down for more variations on that theme.

-Sweeney and Laura fighting together, like they did on Mr. Town’s train of torture. Whether it’s a bar fight of their own making, or the big gods’ war they find themselves embroiled in, or something else entirely.

-Things happen and Laura finds herself in the position to throw Sweeney under the bus but also help/save him, and while he knows it’s only karma (he did kill her way back when), he can still be pissed off about it – how do they navigate this?

-Related to that, the Baron said: “In death is her true love, but she betrays him also.” If that meant Sweeney, or can mean Sweeney in the future (I don’t like destiny-wills-it stories, and they’re definitely not there yet, but they could maybe get there at some future point, and even then It Would Be Complicated), was the betrayal Laura rejecting him after the loa ‘fuck them,’ or is it something that hasn’t happened yet, and if so, what?

-Laura gets fully alive again, but traces of her (un)dead state remain – what are they, how does she cope, what price did she/he/they have to pay for her resurrection, and how does their relationship change? I’d especially be curious how it would work if they’re already a sorta-maybe-item and then she’s alive again and it’s weird in a new way.

-For reasons I’ll leave up to you, Sweeney and Laura have to stay put in a single place for a while and end up essentially cohabiting, regardless of what their relationship is at that point. Take “cohabiting” as literally or as creatively as you want – in any case, I’m sure it will be marvelously disastrous and amazing. If the place they have to stay happens to be NOLA, all the better, I find everything about that city fascinating. Or, if you wanted to use book canon, Laura and Sweeney (rather than Shadow) are the ones who have to spend time living in Lakeside and deal with its creepy Norman Rockwell-ness and with Hinzelmann.

-Slight or major AU from the opening of “The Ways of the Dead”: Laura has hitchhiked with Sweeney instead of going off in a huff with Wednesday, or she otherwise gets to New Orleans sooner, and she and Sweeney tear up the town together. Maybe they even cross the paths of some loa and it doesn’t get all angsty. They were actually getting along nicely in those first couple of scenes in NOLA, only ribbing each other a little while still being their grouchy selves, before they got to Le Coq Noir. I wouldn’t have minded seeing some more of that.

-AU from the end of “The Ways of the Dead”: they still have their big fight (which was amazing as well as painful) or some variation thereof, but they don’t split up. (Maybe the reason is as mundane as Sweeney refusing to get left behind or they have a shared ride out of town, or maybe the more time passes the less Sweeney can afford to be far from his coin – or maybe the coin needs him close by to work at full capacity.) And then what?

-All the old gods hide their true appearance to an extent. A situation arises in which Laura sees Sweeney’s true, or at least old, self. Or Wednesday’s war ends in victory, meaning the old gods again get belief, worship, and sacrifices. How does Laura, the ultimate skeptic even when she’s on the other side of the mirror, react? How does this new knowledge and new reality change her opinion of/attitude to Sweeney? Or to flip that around, if Sweeney were again relevant and believed-in, would that actually change his bad attitude and fix his issues (my guess is it would be complicated)? On that note, Sweeney’s decline from Lugh to king to leprechaun was more sketched in than really explored in canon, ditto I didn’t really get why he couldn’t seem to remember his own history except in snatches (the curse that made him a bird/madman of the woods?) – I’d love to see more about it and his (not) dealing with it, or with a reversal of that decline. Eorann told him long ago to adapt and change with the times – but what does that mean after humpteen centuries in a rut and becoming used to always feeling angry and unappreciated?

-The power of names, since they never use each other’s in canon: for all his “dead wifeing,” there comes a time when Sweeney (has to) call her by her actual name, and that’s a tricky moment for them to navigate. Or, Mad Sweeney is not his actual name, and true names have great magical power and so must be kept secret; Laura discovers or learns his name, from someone else or from himself; what does she do with that knowledge? Or, Sweeney gets to say “cunt” in a situation (sexual or otherwise) where, not only does Laura not peel his lips from his gums, but she finds that she can’t object, even though she knows that he knows that he’s getting away with it.

-They’re both so complicated and contradictory and spiky, but they also start to care and rely on each other - and react really badly when they (think the other one) betrayed them. I would like to see those nuances explored some more and/or to see Laura and Sweeney get to a point where they trust each other and rely on each other, and know it and accept it, however difficult the getting there and being there may be for them.

-Sweeney and Laura get drunk and wake up married. Or some sex and/or blood resurrection spell results in basically an unbreakable marriage bond, whether it also secures resurrection or not. Or marrying the dead keeps them (sorta) alive. Or being married makes it possible for them to share magical/supernatural abilities. They’re both pissed about it, but secretly having to make it work may not be the worst thing that’s ever happened...

-My perfect AG spinoff would basically be Sweeney and Laura tooling around America, looking to get her resurrected (whether they succeed or not is up to you), stealing ever more ridiculous vehicles, arguing/fighting and having those pesky moments where vulnerability and genuineness creep in – and fucking. So yessiree I’d be down for porn, including “it’s technically necrophilia/zombiesex” porn, including a canon-divergent first time, or their second time, or all the later times after they had their first time in NOLA in canon.

-If you wanted to throw in some worldbuilding, maybe something exploring living death. Magical bargains. What kind of favor did Sweeney do for Ostara that would be worth her bringing someone back to life as repayment? What other powers might Sweeney have – or have left from when he was Lugh? How long can a dead wife keep going before she’s “soup”? What other superhuman abilities might dead!Laura have? Can the dead do magic? What even are the rules governing and the limits of different beings’ magical abilities? For example, why can’t Sweeney just take his coin back, or why does Laura gain super-strength as part of her undead package deal? Is the hoard in the same space as the behind-the-scenes accessed through the merry-go-round, or it’s a different place? Why does the coin seem to start to “run down” the longer Laura has it? Why did Wednesday need Laura to kill Argus when he killed Vulcan himself just fine? What happens with Gungnir now it’s in the hoard – can only Sweeney get to it, has it been transformed somehow (it’s now the treasure of the sun), etc.?

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (TV)

Lenny Bruce/Miriam “Midge” Maisel/Susie Myerson

Lenny Bruce & Miriam “Midge” Maisel & Susie Myerson

Lenny Bruce/Miriam “Midge” Maisel & Miriam “Midge” Maisel/Susie Myerson

I’m here for Midge’s adventures in the intoxicating, foul-mouthed, and often-frustrating world of comedy, so her dynamic with Susie and Lenny is where it’s at. Shippy or platonic, I just love the interactions between these three, and between every pair combination among them: Midge and Susie bantering and swearing and tits-upping even when they irritate each other, Midge and Lenny bringing the pathos as well as the humor, and Lenny and Susie both being hardened old pros with still a little glimmer of starry eyes. I am good with L/M/S or L&M&S or L/M & M/S – so, if you go the shippy route, either a V-shaped triad or hey, Susie (whom I absolutely read as gay) might find a way to be good with a full-on triangle… If you want to keep it platonic, True Companions all the way, always there for each other, even when they want to strangle each other. And as much as I like the comedy inherent in the characters, I also love that they’re all three, each in their own way, messed up people and dysfunctional to various degrees. So yeah, I just want Midge to hand the kids over to her parents, ditch Joel once and for all, marry (interpret that as literally or as loosely as you want) both Susie and Lenny, and for the three of them to ride off into the sunset to make comedy history.

Canon-specific DNWs: explicit sex (so nothing above M rating for sex), pairing any two as a / couple with the third as a & hanger-on, Lenny can still be his RL messed-up, drugged-up self – albeit the gentler version the show gives us – but I don’t want him dying if your fic is set in 1966 or after.

Prompts (most of these are from before S3 dropped, feel free to work with canon or diverge however you see fit -- I am all caught up with S3):

-Does Susie manage them both? Does Midge open for Lenny on tour? Does he open for her??? Or they become equal stars on the comedy circuit?

-Maybe Lenny joins Shy Baldwin’s tour, or they run into him while touring Europe or the US, or after Shy fires Midge, Midge and Susie cobble together a Midge-only tour of America and keep crossing Lenny’s own touring path, and they all tool around, and yes I would love as much period detail and geography porn as you can throw at me. And while Lenny and Midge have seen the world, Susie hasn’t – her reaction to different foods, languages, customs, landscapes would be spectacular to witness. Especially if “different” is someplace as close to New York as Jersey or Connecticut, or someplace as far away and different as, say, Japan.

-If they do go to Europe, somehow or other they also tour the Soviet Bloc. Cue culture clashes, getting followed (or thinking they’re being followed) by the secret police, getting hammered on vodka and herring and pickles, and then when they get back to the States, the Feds grill them. It’s all dead serious, and Midge and Lenny refuse to take it as seriously as they should, while Susie is trying but the whole thing is really pissing her off…

-Lenny’s burned out, and Midge is just getting started. This dissonance may or may not find some sort of resolution. One thing’s for sure: Susie has limited patience for both Lenny’s depression and Midge’s need to make everything pretty.

-Instead of going to Joel for a no-way-is-that-closure fling after the Steve Allen Show taping, Midge goes to have a drink or seven with the two people who have, in their own ways, always been there for her and never let her down.

-Midge goes on TV again, this time as the star: longer set, prime time slot, dressing room, the works. She’s dying of nerves. Lenny and Susie coach her through it.

-More radio work to make ends meet in between gigs: hilaribad period ads, hilaribad radio drama, running all over town to be on time, getting paid in all kinds of dubious merch…

-Midge and Susie head out west to make it big and stay with Lenny once they’re in Los Angeles, and it’s marvelous (ha ha) and disastrous in equal measure.

-More of Susie being the hypercompetent manager we saw especially in S3! (And please don’t dwell on her gambling problem, I was not a fan.)

-They all three get drunk, maybe with a hint of sadness if it’s the holidays (you can ignore my DNW about holidays, but please let that be just the background, not the lynchpin of the story) or someone’s birthday, and there’s a bar fight, running from the cops, eating greasy food at ass o’clock, and possibly kissing, not necessarily in that order.

-One or two or all three of them get arrested/have court appearances all over America and have to bail each other out, or find someone to bail them all out, or secure legal counsel – you get the drift. Or all three of them are trying to explain to a single lawyer what happened, talking over each other, the two pros not being able to resist landing zingers and Susie not being far behind, and the lawyer just getting more and more confused.

-They get in trouble some other way – offended patrons, surly management, shitty hotels, tour bus breaks down in the middle of Wyoming – and have to have each other’s backs because no one else will.

-Three-person road trip or tour, and only Susie knows how to drive. So Midge decides to learn, right then and there. And Lenny… Lenny may or may not be too lazy/hungover/lying about not knowing how. There’s supposed to be a rotation so everyone gets to stretch out on the back seat for equal lengths of time, but you know the system doesn’t work too well in practice. Also, they play games in the car to while away the time, and they do it their own way of course: I spy, cows on my side, yellow car, never have I ever, 20 questions, or riffing on whatever’s playing on the radio…

-They sit down to watch the moon landing (you can move it up a bit so it’s not happening a whole decade after S2) – by which I mean, Midge is all gung-ho about the moon landing, and Lenny and Susie are like whatever – and things don’t quite go to plan, but a good time is eventually had by all.

-It’s Yom Kippur again, and Midge wants to do the whole production: synagogue, breaking fast, the lot. Lenny and Susie would rather eat glass. Midge gets her way, of course. Does she decide to bring Susie and Lenny home to meet – or meet properly – her parents??? I bet Abe and Rose’s reactions would be something to see. (This too is an exception to my DNW about holiday settings – I just want stuff to get as crazy as it did the two times we saw Yom Kippur celebrated on the show, and for everything to still somehow turn out relatively OK.)

-Midge and Lenny have cheered each other up when the going got extra rough. I want for Susie to be especially down in the dumps – maybe her boozehound of a mother died and Susie took it worse than she does in canon, maybe some asshole told her she’s a shit manager and got her right in her insecurities – and Midge to rope Lenny into trying to cheer her up. And for Susie to fight them every step of the way but still be glad they care enough to try.

-Inspired by Susie’s brother looking just like her, by which I mean she and he and their sister look nothing alike, and by Lenny’s “she’s my mother” quip about Midge at the TV studio and then his “let me introduce my wife or maybe my sister” in Miami – Midge, Susie, and Lenny pretend to all be blood relatives, or mafiosi, or spies, or something else they’re not, while out in public, say in a restaurant. Just to be assholes and see how long they can keep it going before they break character or people figure them out, or call the cops, or something. There’s totally a bet on who corpses and breaks character first. Or, nice hotels ca. 1960 weren’t very big on letting unmarried couples, let alone threesomes stay in rooms together – pretending to be family might make that easier; forgetting what they’re meant to be to each other, or mixing up their backstories might make it harder. This could also work platonically, if they’re trying to save money by only getting one room, there only being one free room in the hotel, or for any other screwball reason you can invent.

-Lenny and Midge do a (comeback) tour of the Borscht Belt, and all the Steiner Mountain Resort guests (especially the gossipy old hens from the beauty salon) and staff go to see them – and heckle.

-Stuff happens and they end up performing at some hole in the wall place where no one knows who they are (or no one believes it’s really those people they’ve seen on TV) – tough crowd, but a good workout for the two comics, and if Susie gets to threaten to rip off someone’s head, all the better.

-Lenny and Midge honing their routines – and maybe developing a double act – and Susie being all “oh my fucking god, what the fuck!!! … They’re actually good. I’m so proud.”

-Sharing a bed with two other people is an ongoing project: who sleeps (or refuses to sleep) in the middle? Who gets up during the night and why? Who starfishes across most of the bed? Who snores, and how does this get handled? If alcohol or pot have happened, how does that affect the sleeping arrangements? Also, Susie and Lenny witness and react to Midge’s beauty routine, ‘nuff said. Or, for various reasons one person after another ends up decamping to another room/bed/couch, but it doesn’t help them get much sleep or even stay there very long (this is inspired by my love of Shirley Jackson and her short story/humorous essay “The Night We All Had Grippe”). If you prefer to keep it platonic, most of this would work if they’re just sharing a double bedroom on tour (I leave the reason for why Lenny is bunking with the women up to you).

Starred Up (2013 movie)

Oliver Baumer/Eric Love

Yes I do ship it, I do, I do!

Ahem. Don’t get me wrong, I liked what the movie did with the father-son relationship and its influence on both men’s character development – but I really wish they hadn’t got Oliver out of the action before the story’s climax (not like that!). The final denouement with Love father and Love son was great, as was the hint at the end that Eric learned something in anger-management group and has a support network that will help him a lot. But. I would have wanted to see more of the intriguing dynamic between Eric the intelligent, semi-feral, yet not-incorrigible, young thug and Oliver the educated, dedicated, kind yet aware of his own potential for violence (what was he on about with “I need to be here”?), slightly older counselor. They had me at Oliver’s “I want him” and Eric later telling his father that Oliver’s a better man than Love Sr. Also the not-flirting and the push-pull in the scene when Oliver picks up Eric from his cell - yowza!

Exception to blanket DNW: dubcon is a-okay! If you decide to go there, my preferred flavors of dubcon for this canon are: power differential makes it a bad idea but they do it anyway; “I know you want this”; “if the answer’s no/you’re only doing this for a dare or to prove a point, then why are you enjoying this so much [as am I]?”; no no yes a.k.a. starts as dubcon (or one of them thinks they’re dubconning the other), becomes enthusiastic consent. 

Also, if this is relevant or makes you nervous about writing for me, Eric would be 18-19, and Oliver is maybe 10-12 years older – and I like it!!! (The actors were 22 and 31 when the movie was made, FWIW.)

Prompts:

-I would love to see Oliver return to holding his group in prison, so the two of them can interact more, either in the movie’s immediate aftermath or years down the line, as it’s implied that Eric will be serving a long sentence. Give me more scenes from anger management or the ribald, honest, free-flowing conversations in group, either with the other men present (I liked Hassan and Tyrone especially, among the group members) or a one-on-one session.

-An oblique or open-but-undramatic admission/declaration that they both know there’s something there, even if they don’t know what to do with it. Or, one or both of them knows exactly what to do with it, and the push-pull that would result from that.

-Dirty talk: used for arousal, as a defense mechanism, as a form of flirtation. Eric using slurs to assert dominance, and Oliver not letting him hide behind profanity, when he can use colorful language to express emotion and/or sexual interest. There could definitely be some verbal taunting/flirting about who wants/is eager to do what or is good at doing something. There may be some sniping comments about logistics and (lack of) condoms and barebacking and what men get up to in prison. There probably wouldn’t be deep discussions about sexual identity.

-An emergency in the prison requires a lock-down, so Oliver gets temporarily stuck in Eric’s cell or another room with only Eric for company. Things get porny and/or emotional.

-Eric is eventually released (you can handwave this so it happens soon after the movie or have it happen years later) and crashes with Oliver while he adjusts to the outside world. You guessed it: things get porny and/or emotional.

-How do they get to the point where both can cross that line from friends/whatever the hell they are and become, to lovers? (There’s Eric’s personal history and general discomfort with vulnerability, plus all the ways prison sex can be or make things complicated, and if it helps, I headcanon Oliver as either gay or bi and at least somewhat closeted, at work especially.) Who initiates and “directs traffic”? How does their always-contentious dynamic shift during and after sex? Is the sex an isolated (series of) occasion(s), or a progression/escalation over multiple encounters (how would I love especially an escalating series of encounters, let me count the ways)? Eric might seem like the logical initiator and/or dominant partner as well as using the possibility of sex to manipulate and exert control, but then Oliver might (or might not!) surprise him and is definitely the one more in touch with himself as well as aware of his custodial duty toward the men in the group.

-At some point in their intimate relationship (probably not right at the start, and probably not in prison, though if you can make it happen in prison, more power to you!), Oliver decides he’s going to take his sweet time and make Eric fall absolutely apart with pleasure, while using dirty talk to both arouse and empower Eric to own his desires – by that point, Eric is in a place where he can let that happen and enjoy it, even if he still talks tough.

-Or how about this: Eric gets out, relationship happens or is in the process of being negotiated, and while physical intimacy is a whooooole neeeeeew woooorld, you know what else would be cool? Phone sex. Yep. Or even, Eric gets himself one of those secret prison burner phones (preferably hidden somewhere that’s not someone’s arse), and… phone sex after lights-out and lock-down. Maybe nothing (much) has happened physically (yet), so phone sex can be a building block to that or one facet of that deepening intimacy.

Witchblade (TV) Sara Pezzini/Danny Woo

Sara Pezzini & Danny Woo

I used to love this show back in the day, and loved it again in all its hokey gloriousness when I rewatched it recently. Sara figuring things out and being a principled badass, but maybe out of her depth with the Witchblade, and her dynamic with Danny, whether he's a ghost or alive, it’s all catnip to me. Sara is not extremely quippy, she has a job to do dammit! and don’t look at her vulnerable side, just don’t look at it!, and I love that about her (she’s much harsher in S1, after Danny’s death, than in S2); ditto that Danny is somewhat softer than she is, but still can hold his own thanksverymuch (well, when the plot doesn’t require him to get nabbed by bad guys) and has a bit of a deadpan snarker side too. I’d love something that plays around with their canon dynamic from either season, or uses canon as just a starting point. Gen is good, shippy (incl. porny) is good. Some of my prompts lean dark or horror-y, so don’t be shy about going there; I’d also enjoy a story in which the Witchblade itself ends up not being very significant (say, they start to investigate a possibly mystical case and then nope, plain murder). BTW I really like Conchobar too, so if you want to include him (that means also Conchobar Lives AUs), his relationship (current or past) with Sara, or his canonical death somehow, go for it!

Canon-specific DNWs: Irons and any version of Nottingham appearing (you can mention them if you need to).

Exception to blanket DNW: dubcon is fine (see first prompt).

Prompts:

-The Witchblade is more parasitic than symbiotic, and instead of Sara learning to control it, its feeding on Sara affects her more and more over time. Or, the visions and dreams ramp up into full-blown paranoia and/or disassociation. The Witchblade's POV, maybe (it is sentient)? Asking for help is the hardest thing for someone like Sara, but what are (more than) friends for? I’d also enjoy a dubcon scenario where Sara really shouldn’t be having sex when her head is all messed up by the Witchblade’s influence, but… well… they do. The Witchblade canonically enjoys violence and bloodshed perpetrated by its wearers, so it stands to reason that it might lower other inhibitions too.

-Witchblade v. mythological monsters. In S1, even with everything else that's going on, Sara absolutely scoffs at the possibility of vampires. So of course I want: Witchblade v. vampires! The scarier and more feral, the better. Or, it's implied that the Witchblade was forged from a meteorite, so it's basically an eldritch artefact from outer space. Yes, please lean all the way into the Lovecraftian tropes! (The moon is turning red, the Old Ones are back, it’s the end of the world as we know it, but Sara’s got her partner by her side.) Or something from Chinese mythology, so Danny can kick extra ass. Or, for a silly take on Chinese culture: Sara and Danny in the world of Big Trouble in Little China (another old fave of mine, the entire plot of which revolves around… a woman with green eyes and an unwanted connection to the supernatural).

-The Witchblade has a reputation for abandoning its wearers just when they need it the most. True to form, it slips off of Sara’s fist, leaving her and Danny to save themselves with good old-fashioned guns, fisticuffs, martial arts, and of course having each other’s back.

-More of the psychedelic-ness in many of Sara’s fight scenes, where now she’s a woman in a leather jacket with a gauntlet on her arm, now she’s a knight in armor! Now her opponent is human, now he’s a wolf-shaped spirit of evil and hatred! Playing around with the characters’ senses and perceptions – yes!

-Instead of seeing only Danny and needing him to play intermediary for Sara to talk to other ghosts, the Witchblade makes Sara see ghosts all over the place, and it's getting to her. Ghost!Danny may or may not help with that. Or, ghost!Danny is basically always around, whether Sara can see him or not. He manifests when Sara is masturbating, and you can't really feel guilty if the ghost of your dead partner whom you’ve always had a thing for helps you out, and anyway you’re probably going crazy and none of this is real, so it doesn’t count anyway... right?

-Case fic/stakeouts and banter. Flirting/ribbing/joshing to pass the long and stressful days at work.

-Quick and guilty sex because Danny's married. Slow and intense sex if handwave he's not married but “oh noes we’re partners, we shouldn’t be doing this, but somehow we keep doing it anyway.” Hooking up in the car. I've always headcanoned that they had a thing pre-canon which ended for Reasons, but they both kinda wish it hadn't, hence the hand kissing, and the “I can’t even touch you,” and the coffee bringing/stealing, etc. So feel free to play around with that.

-Undercover as married, undercover as a gangster and his moll (LOL at Sara as a moll, or have Sara as the gangster and Danny as her arm candy), undercover as “they think we’re fucking, better fake it real good for the people listening in, oops shit got real fast, careful don’t say each other’s real name or you’ll blow your cover.”

-More timey-wimey shenanigans with the Witchblade. Maybe it allows Sara to manipulate time more than once. Maybe she starts doing it way too often, throwing the continuum out of whack (something non-linear would be very interesting). Maybe she and/or Danny remember some or all of what happened in S1. Something about all the multiverse versions of them, possibly splitting off from a dramatic moment. Time loops and feelings are a combustible mix.

-Apart from the pretty obvious shippiness, what I like about S1 especially is how Sara rolls with the weirdness the Witchblade has brought into her life, instead of reaching for rational explanations. More of that (I can't think of a better way to put it), and double extra brownie points if alive!Danny figures out at least some of what's going on with Sara's bracelet and somehow gets in on the action. Maybe a Danny saves the day divergence? Or how about a loophole that allows a man close to the Witchblade's wearer to wield it temporarily, but There Is a Price to Pay.

Бeсa ǀ Besa (TV)

Dardan Berisha/Petrit Koci

Skënder Berisha & Petrit Koci

Teuta Berisha/Petrit Koci

Divna Dukić/Petrit Koci

Petrit Koci/Marija Perić

Petrit Koci/Uroš Perić

My longest of long-shot requests! If you already know and like this canon, yeeees come sit with me. If you don’t know it, here’s a quick intro: this is a crime drama, one 12-episode season so far, produced in Serbia and created by Tony Jordan of “Hustle” fame. Set in (and with a cast including actors from) several ex-Yugoslav states, the story follows three main characters: a Serbian family man and regular joe who accidentally kills the daughter of a major Kosovar Albanian crime boss in a car accident; said Albanian crime boss who coerces his daughter’s unwitting killer to start working for him as an assassin; and a half-Albanian, half-Serbian Interpol agent (Petrit Koci) who’s after the crime boss but starts investigating the regular joe turned assassin as well.

The show has a twisty plot, gritty and handsome visuals, excellent performances, and a great through-line of deconstructing Balkan machismo and patriarchal culture. All three of the main characters have an image of themselves as MEN who Provide and/or Take Care of Business and Put Family First, each in their own way, and all three end up compromising on all their principles by season’s end. The women in the show’s ‘verse sometimes become collateral damage but also assert themselves in unexpected ways, which is great. The title refers to the Albanian (but more broadly, Balkan) cultural concept that one’s promise/vow/word of honor has to be kept and carried out no matter what, at peril of losing face, dishonoring both oneself and one’s family, even death. This gets deconstructed five ways from Sunday too, and it is awesome.

If you glance at the pairings I’m requesting, I think you can guess who my favorite character is. :-) Koci is so committed to being the “good sheriff” and carrying out his professional duty regardless of whom he has to piss off along the way, but is also often quite ineffectual because the local police forces with which he has to cooperate tend to resent both his attitude and his ethnic background – not to mention that when everyone’s corrupt and compromised, the man who refuses to play the game makes lots of enemies. He’s also a real hard-ass who made a conscious choice long ago to have nothing in his life but his work, is a bit of a bastard, has a huge blind spot about gender which comes back to bite him, and ultimately is driven by a desire for personal vendetta more than an abstract commitment to justice (I love a character who is super focused on their goal and presents themselves as invulnerable, yet whose insecurities and traumas are always just beneath the surface of what drives them). And yes, by the end of the season he’s presented with a Faustian bargain and gets a huge target on his back. There’s a lot to unpack there!

I will eat up any local color you want to throw in. Ditto, the canon is super intense, but if you find a way to bring in some vintage Balkan pitch-black humor, I’m here for it. If you wanted to include some dialogue or phrases or hey write the whole fic in any variation of what used to be called Serbo-Croatian, I’m here for that with bells on! (Unless you’re writing smut – I just can’t with E-rated prose in Slavic languages, sorry.) Alas, I do not read Albanian, but if you want to include dialogue/phrases in it, go for it, so long as you tell me (in parentheses, in footnotes, whatever works) what’s going on.

Canon-specific DNW: soapboxing about Balkan history/conflicts/ethnic relations (the characters can clash about this, use stereotypes, etc. – I just don’t want the fic to be an excuse for the writer’s hot takes, ‘kay?)

Exceptions to blanket DNWs: RL current events being mentioned + dubcon *but* for M/F ships I want both characters to be motivated by anger/revenge/general existential bleakness/whathaveyou instead of or as well as lust, so just no M/f dubcon, please!

Prompts:

-Any of my requested pairings in any kind of casefic, either a divergence, something pre- or post-canon, or a side investigation spinning off from the canon’s central plot. Anything that requires Koci to again traipse all over former Yugoslavia, butt heads with everyone, interrogate people, and do that soft-spoken “you don’t want to give me what I want but you’ll do it anyway” thing he does along the way. 

-Something that requires Koci to use his knowledge of Albanian language and culture even more than in canon. I love how the canon depicts the existential discomfort of never fully fitting into – or being accepted by – either of the cultures/communities to which one has a connection, and how a person can become antagonistic and volatile as a result. Leaning into that would be wonderful.

-Koci has devoted his whole life to bringing down the Berisha clan. With the help or hindrance of any of the other requested characters, he finally gets his wish. Now what?

-Maybe the other character has to turn to Interpol for help/becomes a material witness/gets arrested/enters witness protection, or otherwise has to do teeth-clenched teamwork with Koci. For / pairings, the shippiness doesn’t have to be overt -- antagonism, barely finding common ground, something that reads more like gen or shippy gen than explicit shippiness is fine! If the relationship turns porny, the antagonism (I keep using that word because it fits!) and complicated dynamics and maybe a reluctant recognition that they’re not so different would perpetuate themselves in the porn too, and I’m here for it.

-A few words about the other characters and how they (could) fit with Koci:

Uroš Perić – the regular joe turned assassin, who gets multiple chances in the course of the show to seek Koci’s help and doesn’t because he gets in deep and wants to be the guy that protects his family and takes care of everything himself. I keep thinking back to their very first scene, when Koci gives Perić his calling card and tells him to get in touch, and Perić could have done that before he committed his first murder but… didn’t. And then at the end, there’s that huge spoiler setting up S2. Despite becoming a murderer several times over, Perić is a much softer character than Koci, but he doesn’t like getting pushed around either. How would they work together, how would they clash?

Marija Perić – Uroš’s Croatian wife, who has the thankless role of being married to the guy who’s keeping her in the dark about major plot developments, but makes up for it with how she reacts to the hints she gets of Uroš’s continuing troubles as well as getting on Koci’s radar. She’s scared and out of her depth, but she’s also angry and, yep, antagonistic when she thinks Interpol is harassing her for no reason. I love the scene where Koci interrogates her and she lashes out and won’t give him an inch even when he blindsides her with evidence of her husband’s activities – more of that kind of thing, please! Or what if she decided to protect herself and her kids by cooperating with Interpol, or maybe thought she could help Uroš by turning on him?

Divna Dukić – Koci’s Interpol colleague and maybe the only character that likes him. Their dynamic is both very professionally respectful and yet… “flirtatious” may be too strong a word. They pretty obviously have a little thing for each other but choose not to act on it for a whole mess of reasons (he’s an emotional disaster area, she has enough on her plate as a single mom with a shitty ex, they work together). Also, I have a theory that Divna, while seeming loyal, may take her marching orders from one of the criminal elements or maybe from the more corrupt parts of Interpol or the Serbian police. I would love any or all of that to get explored more.

Dardan Berisha – the grieving crime boss and main target of Koci’s obsession (even though it was actually Dardan’s old uncle Skënder who had Koci’s father killed decades earlier). They’re both such hard, intense men, in part because they’ve had to be, and the narrative sets them up as mirror images of each other (while Uroš Perić is more a study in how someone becomes hard when circumstances push them to it). Yet while their conflict underpins the whole show, they rarely share a scene. Put them together more; let them fight or y’know *waggles eyebrows*.

Teuta Berisha – Dardan’s wife, who first loses her daughter, and by the end of the season her family is totally blown to smithereens, in part because of how she chooses to assert her agency within the super-patriarchal context in which she lives. She was ambivalent about her marriage before we meet her, and I love how canon events bring out her anger, grief, and quiet steeliness. Also, that moment at her daughter’s funeral when Koci gives her his condolences really hit me – they know they are enemies, but there’s that moment of standoffish respect between them. What if somehow they had to work together? Or what if she took over as the head of either the Berisha or the Sokoli clan (or both!)? A divergence from the end or any part of S1 would be very welcome.

Skënder Berisha -- Dardan’s uncle who still wields enormous influence in the Berisha clan and was behind the assassination of Koci’s father decades earlier. I only want this as a & pairing, but the character dynamic is still one of difficult shared history, knee-jerk antagonism, goading humor, not being at all intimidated by each other, and yet recognizing something familiar in each other. One of my favorite scenes from the whole show is their conversation at the hospital, in which they cover both present troubles and the past. Skënder is one of the few characters who can and does consistently run rings around Koci, and I want more of that as much as I want the tables turned.

[candygirl101x]

Romance MD: Always on Call Munechika Takado Review (if you can really call it that)

Honestly I wasn’t expecting to write a review on this, because; 1. I wasn’t the slightest bit interested in the newest release. 2. And secondly…well I don’t write reviews.

But I haven’t seen that much noise about this title yet; whether that’s due to the lack of interest, the lengthy time it takes to read this whole story, the frustrating amount of hearts (A.K.A your hard earned dollar) you have to spend to achieve a SHE, or perhaps all of the above.

When I saw advertisements for Love 365’s latest release, I honestly didn’t give a damn. Oh joy, another Love Choice title (which by the way everyone asked for…not), the same old character types (I felt like Voltage should’ve changed their name to ‘Oresama’s R Us’) and I didn’t take a liking to any of the character’s physical looks either (except Kasumi, what a babe.)

So when Romance MD was finally released I wasn’t rushing to read it. Lately I’ve been more preoccupied reading another otome (Mr Love Queen’s Choice, if anyone is interested) rather than any releases on Love 365 as it just isn’t giving me that enticing story that I’d throw away life’s commitments in an instant to read. After reading Takado’s story, I only wish that I’d stop judging a book by it’s cover (although I know I definitely won’t).

I found myself reading through the story mostly because it was free (we already know the debate on that one, in the end I think I spent £14) and because I was bored. However, it wasn’t long before I found myself being sucked into the story and just thoroughly enjoying the interactions between the characters.

The MC

I could describe the MC as a breath of fresh air, I could describe her as a complete car crash but I feel as though a more accurate description is Marmite. For those of you who don’t know (probably anyone outside of the UK), Marmite is a food spread that people have on toast/sandwiches etc. The debate is that there are thousands of people who love Marmite more than their firstborn child but on the other hand there’s equally as many people who think Marmite is the work of Satan himself, and would find their dog’s faeces more appetising. So I can’t help but feel like you’ll love her for being new, exciting and different…or you’ll hate her because she’s extremely arrogant, a know-it-all and just plain annoying.

Reasons to love the MC:

She’s clever, like really clever. I have no idea what half those words mean that come out of her mouth but this girl knows her shit.                              

She’s determined and persistent. I mean, I guess all MC’s are when I think about it but it’s generally a good trait to have. The MC doesn’t let Takado out of her sight for a second, even using her skills of being on the track team in highschool to sprint after him when he tries to run away which is highly hilarious. Although can you imagine an MC who isn’t persistent? We’d have no story. Kind of funny thinking about that actually, an MC who just says “Right! I’ve had enough of you abusing me, I’m off home to eat ice cream and watch Netflix. You continue cutting people’s legs off willy nilly like they can grow back.”

She’s relatable. I can’t stress this one enough. Yeah maybe not the medical textbook mumbo jumbo but the social awkwardness and the constant daydreams of Sekai (her otome boyfriend) is something many of us can understand.

She’s not a sheep. This girl has a mind of her own. I take my hat off to her for going up against her superior’s when she thinks something is wrong, I don’t have that kind of backbone.

Reasons to hate the MC:

She can be plain rude. Like I can praise the girl for sticking up for herself but sometimes she’s a little too tart-tongued for my liking. I did cringe a bit, wishing she’d dial things back from time to time.

Missing some classic MC traits, comes across as arrogant. I mean, I guess this one is personal preference. I do like the more outgoing MC who isn’t afraid to speak her mind, but surely it’s natural to not be so arrogant in front of doctors who have years of experience on you? Like the MC is 26, I’m pretty sure all of the guys are 30+ (pretty sure Takado is 35) and have been doctors for a longer time than the MC has even been training to be a doctor. I did find myself missing the humble, kind hearted MC a bit. You really don’t have to be arrogant to be a strong willed woman, my favourite MC is the MC from Our Private Homeroom, I felt like she had a good mix of all the traits.

Can be annoying. Like there’s a time and place to be talking about the topic you’re currently spouting on about MC, and now definitely isn’t the correct time/place.

I was honestly saying the same thing to myself Tak

Takado

Takado himself is not necessarily anything we haven’t seen before. He’s not hiding anything you probably haven’t already guessed. Him and the MC have frequent domestics (which 9 times out of 10 end in her being hit over the head with a file) in places they should definitely not be having domestics, which in itself provides a series of highly entertaining scenes, for not only us but also the rest of the ICU doctors. He doesn’t baby the MC, he tells her when she’s done messed up but does also show signs of kindness behind his stoney façade, especially more towards the end of the story. I also appreciated that his backstory was more than meets the eye, there’s nothing I find more boring than a predictable plot line. Generally, I found him likeable. In fact, more often than not I felt sorry for him for having to put up with the absolute garbage that drops out of the MC’s mouth. I dunno how the hell he ended up falling in love with her too, I’d run a mile if that was me. But then again I did pay £14 for him, so if he didn’t I’d be god damn pissed.

He is equally (actually even more so) as intelligent as the MC, without bragging about how much he knows which was rather refreshing. I mean he does call the MC a thousand different variants of the word stupid, but every single time was justified in my eyes.

Although one thing I must say...

God damn son.

Stuff to Note

One thing I need to comment is holy smokes, how long is this story? When I saw the looming 30 chapters I figured that they were probably going to be over faster than my money leaves my account on payday, but boy how wrong I was. Now this almost certainly is a money grab in order to get you to spend more hearts to get the “good choices” but despite that, I was really impressed with just how long the story took me to read. Maybe I’m just getting old, but usually on any main story I can bash it out in under 2 hours. With this, I actually had to stop myself from reading and go the hell to sleep because it was 4 in the morning. When I checked the next day to what chapter I was on, I thought I was tripping when I realised I’d only just made it halfway through the story. Voltage kudos to you. The story was the perfect length to have good plot pacing, decent character development and satisfying romance at the end.

Now granted if you’re looking for a lovey-dovey romance throughout the whole story this isn’t the route for you. The romance doesn’t really kick start until at least 3/4 of the way through this route, and even then it’s nothing that exciting. The MC struggles to understand what love even is herself, having her only boyfriends being fictional otome men (the relatability is real), she finds herself unable to register what those feelings are. It’s not until a playful bullying from the other ICU doctors and a dictionary search that she realises she’s in love.

But in general, I found Takado’s route an enjoyable read with well placed comedic timing and good focus on the the more serious side of things when it was important. So if you find yourself bored like me, maybe just give it a read. Just don’t come at me with torches and pitchforks when you’re $15 poorer.

Moments I Particularly Enjoyed

The reminder that you are in fact reading the correct story

The scientific breakdown of kabedon

The obvious sarcastic remarks, that the socially inept MC doesn’t understand

The casual discussion of banging in the workplace

Pros and Cons

Pros

Character Development. I feel like both the MC and Takado showed character development. The MC when she finally figured out she has to stop being so damn arrogant and realise the consequences of when she opens her mouth. And Takado, that he can’t just tell people they’re having their leg cut off and just walk off.

Length. Need I say more.

Good pacing. Story progresses, MC progresses, Romance progresses. Good job guys.

Well written. Actually laughed out loud a fair few times whilst reading this story, which I definitely wasn’t expecting. Also whoever came up with the idea of the character sprites holding up a board for comic effect is a god damn genius.

Good group dynamics. I mean it’s not KBTBB, but I enjoyed reading the interactions between all the ICU doctors. Hopefully with more releases we’ll be able to see more of their relationship with each other.

Cons

Love Choice. I mean you can read this story completely free…just you won’t know any of the back story, you won’t get any of the romantic moments and you’ll get the shit ending. But if you’re happy spending $15 for a main story then this is a pro I suppose.

Lacking in romance. Now I’m not saying there isn’t any, I personally don’t have an issue with how things progressed (I much prefer the romance to come in following stories like epilogues and sequels) but I have a feeling if you’re after something with a lot of romance running throughout it, this story won’t be for you.

Too many legs were harmed in the making of this route. People be getting their legs cut off more times than I’ve had hot dinners. Everyone thinks Takado goes around cutting people’s legs off for fun…and honestly you can’t blame them for thinking that.

Not many CGs. Remember the days when we had 6 CGs for a main story? I know I’m being picky but having 1 CG in episode 1 and the last CG in the SHE, that only leaves 2 other CGs for 28 episodes. If you’re gonna have a main story that long, surely you can spare another CG or two Voltage?

I’ve put the character sprites and the CGs below a read more button so people can avoid spoilers. So if you’re interested in what I’ve officially renamed the characters keep reading :) VVVVVVVV

Starring

Dr.Amputation (I’m telling you now, you wouldn’t want this one for your general health checkup) (Takado)

Angry Coach (Takao)

Angry Coach’s Wife (Who I’ve actually forgotten the name of)

Darling Boy (Haruto)

Darling Boy’s mother (Yoko)

Flirty McGee (Hosho)

Kasumi’s Die-hard Fan (but can you blame him?) (Kyogoku)

Dean the Absolute Meme (Matsunaga)

Ghost Hospital Director (Seriously, I think we see him like once in the whole route(why is he even on this list? Because I already had a screenshot and I’d figured I might as well use it) (Usagida)

ICU’s On-Call Doctor Dealer (Ekuni)

Total Babe (Kasumi) (Just you wait till your ass is out bitch)

Also can you blame me?

Ultimate Waifu (Missy)

Partner in Otaku Crime (Asuka)

Cute Penguin (Watch out Sydney, she’s coming for your top spot on the favourite Voltage mascot list and probably your large swimming pool) (Kalmia)

A reformed KBTBB Villain (Mario)

The Main Character (Sekai)

The Actual Main Character (Why we see her sprite for one split second I’m not overly sure, but yeah hard pass Voltage)

CGs

Episode 1

Episode 18

Episode 27

SHE

Now if I were you, I’d go and actually find a good review to read. Like @aqvarius

[killjoy-loveit]

Stitch Me Back Together- 1

A/N: This is the fourteenth spooky season story! I apologize for the delay in the continuation of the spooky season short stories, however, I believe it was imperative to take time for my mental well-being. I would like to clarify that everything written in this story is complete fiction and isn’t to be taken as a true portrayal of reality. This is written in 1st POV, the character’s name is Fleur, and this will become a series. I am still working on it, the end date isn’t set as of yet, however, I will try to update it when I can. Every member of Vixx will be featured in this piece, though for this first part the only one of them in it is Ken/Jaehwan.

Excerpt: Currently I was seated in front of my tv, a hot cup of coffee sitting on the table in front of me- being completely ignored. Some reruns of an older show were playing but I couldn’t focus on the scenes of characters bickering about some insignificant problem they had. My mind was too busy running through the events of last night for the millionth time.

Word Count: 3,412

Genre: Supernatural/Fantasy/Mythical AU, Angst

Prologue | Chapter 2 | Chapter 2.5  | Chapter 3

****WARNING: Mentions of blood and death****

     “Fleur.” My sister whined into the phone.

      “What?” I dragged the word out in an identical fashion. Though it wasn't an important question, I knew what she wanted. Sometimes it's just fun to mess with her. Lucille, whom I commonly refer to as Cillie, wanted me to bring her food once I get off my 16-hour shift at the hospital- which ends at midnight. That means not a lot of places are going to be open, plus she works around thirty minutes from where I am. And my apartment is five minutes from where I work, so I'll have to drive all the way back.

     “Pretty please, Fleur? Nothing will be open when I get my break, and I forgot to bring food.”

     “Cillie,” I sighed into the phone. “Fine, I'll bring you food, but only if you promise to set a daily reminder to take food with you to work from now on. This is, what? The sixth time in the past two weeks, you can't keep doing this!”

     “I promise! Thank you, thank you, thank you! You're the best, Fleur! I love you.” She sang into the phone at the end of her excitement.

     “Yeah, yeah, love you too. I have to get back to work now.” I murmur, a smile tugging at my lips.

     “Bye! See you after your shift!”

     I rolled my eyes as I hung up. Lucille can be such a bother, especially since we have a similar work ethic, which is basically to work our asses off. Neither of us has much free time since we spend most of our time at work, which leads to her frequent requests for food. Every time I bring her food, I end up staying while she eats, and we catch up. It's difficult for us to go more than a day without talking and even harder if we go too long without seeing each other. That's what happens when you grow up with parents who don't care about you.

     Our parents were pretty absent, and every promise they ever made fell through, the only thing they were good for was stocking the fridge and keeping a roof over our heads. The only person we had to rely on was each other, and that's how it has remained. Which is probably why it isn't shocking that we ended up in related fields. I became a doctor, just out of my residency stage, and Lucille became a coroner. Even though our jobs tend to dominate our time, I know that neither of us would change it.

     Now, I can't precisely say what Lucille thinks, but for me, this is something I know I'm good at. It's a job where I know I'm making a difference in every life that I save. And it's not necessarily that I only find validation or meaning in saving lives; instead, it's that I don't feel I'm meant to do anything else. If I were to be born again or wake up with amnesia one day, I know that I would always find my way back to this field.

     Despite my shift ending twenty minutes ago, I couldn't bring myself to move. Maybe my brain froze and wasn't capable of rationalizing what had happened. Or, the more likely reason was that I was in shock. My pale-yellow scrubs were stained a dark red from an amount of blood that no person could lose and still live. I couldn't keep him alive. Why couldn't I save him? Did I move too slow? Did I crack under pressure? Would I get fired? There was just so much blood everywhere, it covered all of the wounds to the point I couldn't find where the most blood loss was coming from. There were so many bullets. How was I supposed to staunch the bleeding from nine bullet wounds?

     A hand clapped down on my shoulder, a sore attempt at a comforting gesture. “Hey, you did the best you could. Don't hate on yourself because of this, okay?”

     I swallow roughly as I look up. “How am I not supposed to hate myself? That guy was practically a kid! He couldn't have been older than nineteen, and now he's lying dead because I couldn't do my job right and save him!”

     “Fleur,” Carson sighed, dropping into the seat next to me. “This is the first time you've had someone die on you, isn't it?”

     I nod, averting my gaze from the older doctor.

     “Well, I'm sorry to break it to you this way, but this won't be the last time someone dies on you. The only way to move past it is to know you did everything you could, and you did, Fleur. You didn't make a mistake; you did everything right. The guy came into our ER like someone used him as a practice dummy,” He said, getting to his feet. “Don't blame yourself, you weren't the one who shot him.” Carson paused at the door, turning to say one more thing. “And actually, I'm surprised he wasn't DOA.”

     Logically I knew he was right; it wasn't my fault the patient died. It's just that maybe I could have done something more. And if I had, he might not be dead right now. Which, yes, I'm aware that it's stupid since I did everything I could. If my vision was better or my hands faster, he might have survived. But all the maybe's or what if's in the world can't change the outcome. Shaking my head, I finally stand up and grab my coat. I couldn't find the energy, nor did I care enough, to change from my scrubs. Lifelessly I pulled on my coat, zipping it to hide the bloodstains.

     The drive over to the lab where Lucille worked went by in a blur after I grabbed food. I honestly couldn't remember the details of how I arrived. Maybe I should've called a taxi. Cillie's workplace was always cold. It makes sense; it is a morgue. I've never liked walking through the hallways to get to her office, the lighting is frequently dim, and it typically leaves me feeling uneasy. Like there's something off about the whole building, kind of dark and creepy. It could be from all the death this place has seen. I don't understand how she can work here without a problem; I'd probably become paranoid in a matter of days if I worked at this place.

     Whenever I come, Cillie tends to be in the main area of the building, where the dead bodies are kept. I've never gone inside that area, and this time was no exception. Knocking thrice on the door was enough to signal to her that I was waiting for her.

     And she responded with a quick shout. “Give me a sec, I'll be right out!”

     Cillie raved excitedly about the autopsy she'd performed earlier on the walk to her office. Something about malformed organs and how amazed she was that the lady had managed to live for so long. Her chattering was nonstop, even when we reached our destination, and she plopped into her chair. She only went quiet after digging into the bag of food, munching happily on the chips within.

     “That sounds exciting, Cillie,” I say quietly.

     “It was, Fleur,” She breathed out, bouncing lightly in her seat. “You should've seen it!”

     “I'm glad I didn't.”

     Lucille's eyebrows furrowed as she looked at me, the chip in her hand quickly forgotten. “Why do you seem off? Did something ha—” She froze mid-question, eyes locked onto the small portion of my scrubs peeking out from my coat. “Why is there blood on your scrubs?”

     “I work at a hospital.”

     “Now is not the time to be smart with me,” She snapped. “You don't usually wear your scrubs out of the hospital on a normal day, and the one time you do, there's blood on them. Something's up, tell me what happened. Now.”

     “I lost someone.” Tears stung at my eyes as I stared at the ground. I was afraid that if I looked at her, and saw the sympathy on her face, that I would break apart. It's hard for me to stop crying once I start, so it's best not to start in the first place. I would've been fine, really, I would have. But then she hugged me, and the floodgates opened.

     Her hands smoothed down my back. “It's okay. Fleur, it's okay.”

     “I'm sorry.” I sobbed into her shoulder.

     “Don't you dare apologize! Losing a patient is hard, but I know you. And you always put a hundred and ten percent effort into everything. Do you know what that means?” I shook my head as she pulled back from the hug. “It means that I know you did everything you could to save that person.”

     My lower lip quivered. “I did.”

     “I know,” Lucille murmured. “Now, do you feel comfortable alone at home, or should I ask for the rest of the night off?”

     “No, no, you don't need to ask off the rest of the night. I… I'll be fine by myself.” My voice broke at the end, and I thought for a second that Cillie might try to ask off anyways.

     She eyed me in disbelief but nodded nonetheless after a moment's consideration. “Fine, but you call me in the morning. And I want you calling out for your next shift, you'll be of no use to anyone until you can move past this.”

     “Okay.”

     I did just as Lucille ordered when I woke up the next morning. My supervisor expressed her concern and mentioned that there was a policy in place for just this situation. That being required therapy and a week away from the hospital before being permitted back. At that moment, I felt both relieved and anxious. Time off meant having nothing to do, and that meant being left alone with my mind. How was that supposed to help? I could avoid such thoughts during the day when distractions are plentiful, but at night there's nothing to keep the darkness from creeping in. I guess that's what the therapy's for. Hopefully, it would be able to help rid me of the lingering doubt and guilt I held. I called Lucille after speaking with my supervisor, but as expected, she was asleep. A message left on her voicemail was sure to suffice, seeing as Lucille could probably sleep through the apocalypse.

     The television sat on its stand, playing old reruns and being completely ignored by me. It wasn't alone, though, as a cup of coffee sat on the table in front of me, forgotten. My mind was so far off, in a place where the incessant bickering of some sitcom characters couldn't reach. I was too busy running through the events from the night prior for what seemed to be the millionth time. Granted by this point, I had lost count; I just knew that the times I had replayed the events were numerous. Each time something was nagging at the back of my mind, something wasn't right. The guy shouldn't have still been alive when he got to the hospital. The whole situation felt off.

     Even Carson said that the patient should've been dead on arrival. And this is the statement of someone who has been a doctor much longer than I. This begs the question, why wasn't he? From the moment I set my hands on him, he maintained a steady pulse, and I thought there was a chance. It was small, but there was still a sliver of me that thought I could save him. That hope was short-lived, though, only lasting a scant minute. After that, it was just like his body short-circuited, and everything stopped. There was nothing I could do at that point. 

     The number of bullets in his body seemed too high. Either there were multiple shooters, or someone really hated that guy. Except if it was just someone who hated him, why would they use a gun? Most murders that involve an intense emotion occur with whatever weapon is closest to the attacker, which, more often than not, is a knife or an object that could be used to hit or bash. A gun would allow the attacker to become distanced from the victim, and it could potentially remove the emotional aspect entirely. That means whoever shot my patient wasn't particularly close to him, they might not have even known him at all. Unless the shooting was premeditated, which could mean that hatred had been building for a while. Or he could've just been in the wrong place at the wrong time. All of this is just pure speculation though, I'm no cop after all.

     A loud rapping on my door had me springing up from my couch. It couldn't be Lucille. Who is at my door at, what is it, ten a.m.? I made my way over to the door quickly, hoping to prevent the person from knocking again. As I opened the door, I noticed the person's hand was raised to knock once more before it dropped hastily.

     “Is there something I can help you with?” I questioned softly.

     The man standing in front of me appeared very well put together. Dressed in a light gray button-up with a navy tie, black dress pants, and matching shoes. His was dark hair swept to the side, and he had eyes that simmered with a hidden secret. To top it all off, his coat resembled a trench coat, albeit slightly more modern and fashionable.

     “Fleur Boudreaux?”

     I hesitated, slightly confused as to how he knew my name. “Yes?”

     “I'm Detective Lee, and I have a few questions about the death of a Remi Juarez. The patient you had in the ER last night.” He stated, producing a badge from one of his pockets.

     “Oh, um, of course, detective.” I stepped aside to let him into my apartment.

     Two steaming cups of coffee sat on my kitchen table, one untouched and the other half empty. Of course, it was the cup sitting in front of me that was still full; exactly how am I supposed to calmly drink coffee while being questioned about a patient's death? The air felt thick, quite suffocating as the silence stretched on. Had he asked a question? I couldn't recall him asking anything yet. All I remember is that I asked if he wanted a cup of coffee, and he nodded, thus the coffee. Is he waiting for me to say something?

     “Did you ask something?” I murmur, looking up from the dark liquid swirling in the cup in front of me.

     He nodded, a smile playing at his lips. “Yes, I asked if you were okay. You seem a bit, well, a bit unsettled.”

     “Sorry, sorry. Actually, I'm not okay, but that's none of your concern. You had questions about the guy I treated in the ER?”

     “That's correct. Did you notice anything odd about him?”

     My eyebrows scrunched together. “What do you mean, odd?”

     The detective shrugged. “Just anything out of the ordinary.”

     “No. No, I didn't. What I noticed,” I continued, my voice beginning to rise. “Was that he was shot nine times and that he was bleeding out under my care because I couldn't get the bullets out and stop his bleeding quickly enough.”

     “Did you manage to recover any of the bullets?” Detective Lee asked, tilting his head, fingers tapping an odd rhythm on the table.

     “No,” I muttered, crossing my arms and looking away from him. Tears threatened to spill from my eyes.

     The questions continued until he'd gotten every ounce of information I knew about the patient, who I'd learned was named Remi Juarez. Though I didn't know much to begin with, what information I had was given to him. It was difficult to tell what he was expecting from me, but it seemed like he was relieved that I didn't know much. But I wasn't sure why he'd be relieved about that unless there's something fishy going on. Briefly, the urge to ask why I was being questioned instead of the detective using the coroner's report for information flashed through my mind. Thankfully, I managed to keep that question to myself.

     The detective stood up, reached into his pocket, and pulled out a card. “Well, if you think of anything that seemed out of the ordinary, please call.”

     “I will, sir,” I replied softly.

     When I stood, I went to take the card from him, and as I did, our fingers brushed for a fraction of a second. And it was in that seemingly insignificant contact that shifted something inside me. The anguish I'd been feeling about losing my patient disappeared, replaced by a feeling of complete serenity. My chest felt lighter, almost more comfortable to breathe. I couldn't remember ever feeling such peace in my life. Wide-eyed, I looked from the card to him. It was the glimmer in his eyes and the tilt of his smile that hinted he was hiding something. Surely… Surely, he couldn't have anything to do with the sudden peace I was feeling. Could he? No, that's impossible. How could someone change another person's emotions with a single touch?

     With the rate at which my thoughts were spinning, I barely remembered that he was on his way out until I saw him walk towards the entrance of my apartment. “Let me get the door for you.”

     Before I could reach the door, it swung open, revealing Lucille balancing a tray of coffee while simultaneously unlocking my door and clutching a bag in her hand. As she stepped fully inside the apartment with a satisfied smile after yanking her keys free, she looked up and froze, eyes widening considerably. “I didn't know you had company, Fleur.”

     “Lucille,” I shot her a look, indicating she shouldn't overreact. “This is Detective Lee, he had questions about the patient that died last night.”

     At the mention of him questioning me, a fiery blaze grew in her eyes. Lucille hastily placed the coffee tray on the table, which was quickly joined by the bag of food. Then she spun to face the detective, hands placed heavily on her hips the way she does right before she goes to reprimand someone. Which is precisely what she proceeded to do before I could stop her.

     “You listen here, I understand that you have a case to solve and all that crap, but you should have some sensitivity! Or at the very least some human decency.” She took a step closer to him, finger poking harshly into his chest. “I don't know if you consider questioning a doctor who is an emotional wreck an okay thing to do, but in my book, it isn't! Maybe you should've thought harder about whether or not you should question her once you saw she wasn't in the best state of mind. Did you even think of that? No, I bet you didn't. Solving the case comes first, not someone else's mental well-being!” Lucille ranted.

     “I—” He started only to get cut off, his mouth opening and closing in a similar manner of that of a fish.

     “Nope, I don't care to hear ‘how important this case is.’ What I want,” Lucille snarked, shepherding him to the door. “Is for you to leave, so that I can make sure my sister is okay. Oh, and for you to learn some human decency, okay?” She quickly shooed him out, opening the door and all but pushed him out. Then for good measure, she slammed it shut in his face and locked it.

     Lucille turned to me, moving swiftly to embrace me. “Are you okay? I can't believe he questioned you right now, he should have at least waited a day.”

     “I'm fine, actually.” My words got muffled by her shoulder, which I tapped lightly to get her to release me. To an outsider, Lucille might appear like the older sister, but it's just in her nature to mother everyone. I still have the upper hand in age, though, a whopping two years I have on her.

     She pulled away, stepping back only to give me a skeptical look. “Uh-huh. Well, I brought coffee and food, and I took the day off to be here with you. We can binge whatever movies or shows you want, and I will supply you with all the food you crave today.”

     “Alright.”

[invelleity]

psst. be honest. all of the questions. go.

i can’t believe jeanette is tryina kill me in public and i’m still love her??? | not accepting anymoooore | @ltbroccoli​

cracks knuckles here we go ( odd numbers 1-9 are here )

2. Are aesthetics important to you? If they are, why?

Not very. It’s fun and cute and all, but I care a whole lot more about “clicking” with people and having fun writing with them.

Exception: If someone’s aesthetic is so overblown that I can’t even find the pages on the blog or read the text, I.....won’t interact with that tbh.

4. How do you explain rp to someone in the real world?

(kicks down my roommate’s door at 10pm) “OK so I’m writing— stop screaming, it’s me,— I’m writing a character in Security and you’re like a double black belt or some shit, can you explain how—”

( My roommates all know it’s a thing I do but I’ve never sent them a link or shown them any of the actual writing. They’ve met a bunch of y’all over like Rabbit streams and @rumdaydreams​ irl though so like.... They Know. )

More under the cut

6. Do you prefer writing male muses or female more? Why?

Ehhh, depends on my mood. I lean towards female muses in general ( definitely got a bigger chunk of ladies on my list, for sure for sure ) but I love my boys.

8. Name any three things about the rpc that bother you.

Uhhhh A) We’re all such dumb socially awkward blobs so it’s often hard to get to know new people.

B) The feel that if you have a good relationship with one person who writes a canon muse, it’s some kind of lowkey betrayal to write with other people who write the same muse??

C) How much I, a certified card-carrying dumbass, stress myself out about posting on a “regular” schedule. Does that count? Like I want the blogs to look “presentable” lmao and me@me Calm The Fuck Down.

10. Have you ever had a bad experience with commissions? As either someone who makes them or as someone who buys them?

N / A

11. What do you know now about rp that you wish you knew when you first started?

Uhhhh, when I first started was long enough ago and the community was so different a lot of those lessons no longer apply. I wish when I finally jumped over to Tumblr I’d realized quicker how the new like....basic ways of meeting people and posting and all worked, which was mostly just a “calm down and go with the flow more, let go of your stupid rigid old habits” lmaooo.

12. Have you been involved in drama? Do you regret it?

yES. Yeah. Hahaha ha h. 

But ummm, not usually. No. Most of my drama has been either A) me posting the very very softest, most diluted version of barely-touching on my politics and my real goddamn life and people being fuckin butthurt as hell about or B) cutting people who were toxic and draining out of my life. So.

13. Have you ever thought about leaving rp? What caused it? What changed your mind?

cw suicidal ideation ment

Yeah. Once I actually did — when I started college I just didn’t have the time, so I peaced from the larger community to just write with close friends for a while. I’ve also considered leaving the T.umblr RPC a few times, but really only because of long bad depressive episodes. Coming back and “not wanting to literally die irl ha Ha” and catching up with my drafts gets me back on track lmao. 

14. Do you think rp has had a positive or negative affect on your life or you as a person?

Positive! Sometimes I worry that I spend too much time wrapped up in fiction and miss my real life, but I’ve learned to keep my time more separate so now it’s just good to have a healthy hobby that makes me happy. Also I’m definitely a much better writer for it, and there a lot of networking skills I think translate to real workplace skills so it’s 👌

15. How has rp changed you personally?

See above, tbh. And it gives me a lot of good outlets for writing ideas that would otherwise stew in my head until I hated myself for never ever writing any lmao. It’s good.

16. If you could change one thing about rp on tumblr, what would it be? Why?

Oh, I dunno. I wish I could post replies from mobile more easily, god. That’d keep me a lot more on top of my drafts lmao.

17. Have you ever sent a message to yourself on anon? Why?

Not on any of the rp blogs. ;^)

18. Have you ever sent hate to yourself on anon? Why? 

No, wtf

19. Do you delete anon hate or post and address it? Why?

Depends on the hate — things I feel need to be addressed or I want to be clear about not tolerating I’ll post. Personal hate and mean shit I delete.

Or if it’s stupid and makes me laugh I will definitely post that shit.

20. Have you ever felt pressured to write something you weren’t comfortable with?

Sometimes. If a partner is actually pressuring me I’m real good at saying uhhh hey, fuck off about that? but sometimes partners will perfectly-innocently be enthusiastic about things I’m not super comfortable with and that’s harder to bring up. So it’s..... more like I pressure myself, whoops.

21. Have you ever followed someone because you felt like you had to, not because you wanted to?

Ehh. Not really. Sometimes I’ll follow a friend of a friend despite lack of interest just because, like.... My friends are smart and good, maybe I’m just not getting the right “vibe” from their blog as who really they are. Sometimes that just means we never click and I unfollow them later. Or sometimes @rumdaydreams​ drags me straight to mutual hell and we write 20,000 unfinished bullshit and meet irl and she actually talks me into wholeass new blogs and muses. So, you know. Mix bag.

22. What would make you block someone?

Red flags for manipulation and lowgrade emotional a.buse, especially ones I viscerally feel in my stomach from previous experiences. Obvious r.ight-leaning politics ( Weirdly, I’m not particularly comfortable around people who don’t think I or my friends deserve to be treated like human beings! A character quirk, haha! )

Also ngl sometimes I block people just to remind myself I’ve followed them before and I don’t wanna re-follow them six times and look like I’m trying to intentionally harass them. My memory is bad but the block button always knows, lmao. 😅

23. Have you ever stolen something from someone else?

Not intentionally — I try very hard not to steal hc from duplicates or take plots without asking. But, y’know, sometimes an idea sticks in your head and you eventually just forget where it originally came from.

24. Have you ever had something stolen from you? If so, how did you handle it?

Not that I’m aware of.

25. Are you open to duplicates? Why / why not?

Absolutely, for the most part! I like seeing other perspectives, and especially since @thewrongsorts​ is such a bigass multi it lowkey just makes my life easier.

There are a few exceptions — less because they’re duplicates and more because there are hc/fanon I just......dislike enough I don’t wanna write with them. Not a feeling that’s limited to duplicates tbh.

26. How do you feel about vague posting? 

Ehhh. It’s like not a great thing, but I get the appeal. I tend to unfollow if someone posts a lot of it because then they’re just passive-aggressive as a person, but the occasional vagueblog I don’t mind. Sometimes you gotta get shit off your chest but you don’t wanna make it a wholeass call-out, I get it.

27. Do you follow people even if they don’t follow you back?

Generally I unfollow. I’m here to write, if we’re not interacting it’s clogging my dash. ( Honestly I unfollow mutuals eventually if we never write.... ) But very occasionally someone’s got such good #takes and hc that I stick around just bc I stan.

28. Do you read people’s rules before following or interacting?

A l w a y s.

29. What is your opinion on “reblog karma” and do you practice it?

It’s nice! Like.... I wouldn’t require anyone to do it, but it makes people feel better about their blogs, it’s polite. I know I’m happier getting memes as well as passing them along. You know, be social. Connect with people. I always try to practice it, yeah.

30. How have you responded to popular slang used on tumblr? Do you use it in every day life? Do you use it at all?

Uhhh, yeah. My irl social circles are a lot of dumb gay millennials, we use a lot of dumb internet slang.

31. Is there something you don’t know the meaning of but you haven’t asked anyone because you think it’s supposed to be general knowledge?

Oh yeah! Joined Tumblr rpc ten years late with Starbucks! But also like.... I’m a web developer. 90% of my irl workskills are being good at Googlin’ shit. So I’ve pretty much always found the answer on my own, at least. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

32. Was there ever something you had to ask someone to explain? 

( See above. )

33. Have you ever experienced discrimination? 

Here or irl or....? I mean yes in any case, but much less often in the rpc specifically. This blog is a lot less outspoken ( both about politics or about who I....am....generally ) than most of my others or me irl.

Shoutout to that time I complained one (1) time about how copacetic the H.arry P.otter rpc is and an actual irl n.eon.azi jumped in my inbox lmaooooooo.

34. How do you feel about personal blogs following your rp blog?

Uhhh, I don’t love it? But if they mostly chill and don’t fuck with my actual threads I usually ignore them. ¯\_( ‘ ‘ )_/¯

35. Have you ever cried while writing a reply?

No. I’m not like......good at crying. 😐

36. Do you read other people’s threads or do you only read your own?

Depends on the blog. Some multis I follow are in fandoms I just like don’t even understand, so I don’t read those. Sometimes I just don’t got the energy. But I read a lot of my friends’ other threads or threads on blogs I stan.

Good writing is good shit and I’m.....a big 👀 bitch. Tbh.

37. What’s one thing that other people seem to hate that doesn’t bother you?

Call-out posts, bringing real life politics into rp, generally acknowledging that we have lives outside of the fictional world that affect how we read and interact with fiction.

( 👏 The O.rder 👏👏 of the 👏 P.hoenix 👏👏 is A.ntif.a 👏👏👏 )

I don’t want to ever push that onto other people though, definitely. (Especially people affected by terrifying irl politics and coming here for escapism. )

38. How do you feel about tagging triggers? Do you tag them? How do you determine what is triggering content and what isn’t?

Always 👏👏 tag 👏👏 fucking 👏 triggers 👏👏👏

I tag things that are common or obviously upsetting, and if someone asks I add whatever tags they need to my list — the “list” is mostly a mental tally so I occasionally fuck up, but god I feel strongly about triggers.

Let 👏 people 👏 who are hurting 👏👏 live. 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

39. What advice would you give to someone new to rp?

Poking around to see how other people seem to “operate” and scrolling through posts about how to get started is so so so fucking helpful! Don’t be afraid to do it!

Also reach out to people as much as you can work up the spoons to. If they’re rude back to you, like..... They were never worth your time anyhow. You dodged a bullet.

( Value yourself 2k19 )

[thisdayinfavrd]

March 26, 2009

Jon Stewart gets bleeped. Jonas leans over to me and quietly says, "I think he said 'fucking'." Pretty sure I'm doing it wrong.   @AmyJane (Amy Jane Gruber) – 91

Irony is reading a conversation on Facebook about how Twitter is a waste of time.   @sween (Jason Sweeney) – 69

OH: She's so ugly she blocks WiFi.   @SeoulBrother (SeoulBrother) – 61

DO SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES EVEN (clickthestar) WORK?   @tehawesome (Henry Birdseye) – 59

Did I just check out a cute hipster dressed like on old lady or a cute old lady dressed like a hipster? I'm okay with either.   @lonelysandwich (Adam Lisagor) – 59

The Gap's brand message: hot people still look hot, even in our shitty khakis.   @scottsimpson (Scott Simpson) – 54

In retrospect, "omg I want to make out with you!" was an inappropriate and unprofessional way to express gratitude in the workplace.   @CcSteff (Stephanie) – 54

I love you, you're the bee's knees. The bee's thighs. And thorax. Wings too. OK, basically you're a goddamn bee. That's how much I love you.   @sniffyjenkins (Justine Kilkerr) – 51

I just spent a whole decade making PowerPoints and getting mad at the internet. I hope I get one of those biographers who makes shit up.   @fireland (Joshua Allen) – 51

"If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything." -Marilyn Monroe  "If you can make a guy laugh, he probably teabagged you." -Me   @sween (Jason Sweeney) – 50

Meant to give my elevator pitch, but instead pitched a tent in the elevator.  Yup, still doing it wrong.  Still, nice display of enthusiasm.   @Moltz (Moltz) – 49

This is the parenting job I hate most: pretending The Boy throwing his burrito at the dog isn't the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen.   @seanhussey (Sean Hussey) – 42

There are two types of men in this world: those that'd be disgusted by my drinking all the gravy out of my chicken pot pie, and the gays. �� @Jessabelle2o7 (Jess) – 41

I'm confused. If an act of terrorism is now a "man-made disaster" what are we supposed to call Joan Rivers' face?   @badbanana (Tim Siedell) – 41

21-year-old girl: "I still read fan fiction." Professor: "No offense, but were you home-schooled?"  Yes, I am going to love this class.   @katefeetie (one katie please) – 41

That warmth splashed through her, filling her, then draining away in waves from her wide open, gasping mouth, until the neti pot was empty.   @texburgher (Geoff Barnes) – 39

This blind guy on American Idol is Sasha Baron Cohen's best character yet.   @badbanana (Tim Siedell) – 38

Perhaps my new retirement plan depends too heavily on the capture of Mexican drug lords.   @badbanana (Tim Siedell) – 38

Scissor Sisters just teamed up with the Jonas Brothers to form a new group:   Cut the Shit   @MODAT (Modat) – 34

Finding a fingernail in my chicken salad is like finding money in my pocket except that it's really, really not like that at all.   @trelvix (Trelvix) – 33

[filthyjanuary]

5, 14, 17, 25, 30?

5)      Samjess, Sameileen, Samruby, Samcas, or someone else?

ALL EXCELLENT SHIPS except unpopular (?) opinion, I liked Sam and Eileen better as friends and truly did not feel any chemistry whatsoever when they shifted them to being a couple, and I also feel like Eileen lost a lot of her spark once the relegated her to Love Interest. I think Sam deserved more friends on this show and I found it frustrating that everyone he got to have the primary connection with was a woman who then became Love Interest, which is why I love Sam/Rowena so much. I know people shipped that a lot but I was so RELIEVED that Sam got to HAVE A FRIEND!!!! A WOMAN!!!!! JUST AS A FRIEND!!!! And then he still had to kill her because the writers hate Sam but I’ll take my small victories. Sam/Jess is so sweet like I know we meet Jess for like 15 seconds but I love her, I really do, and I think about Sam/Jess so much in the what could have been way. SASTIEL is /THEE/ Cas ship actually, sorry not sorry. They are SO fun when they’re together, and the whole dynamic of Cas going from ‘greetings blood freak’ to ‘nothing is worth losing you’??? HELLO!!!!! Human dude who feels unclean and is constantly clinging to faith and looking to divinity for absolution combined with angel that meets him because he’s following orders and who slowly becomes disillusioned with a system he sees as corrupt!!!!! HELLO!!!!!!!!!! Also Sam like... is actually nice to Cas and frankly if the whole Wall Thing hadn’t happened, I would be like shouting Sastiel from the rooftops but unfortunately, I am not willing to forgive transgressions against Sam Winchester (except for Dean, he sometimes gets a pass. S9!Dean do not interact). I loveeeee Sam/Ruby. It is fucked up and ugly and manipulative and I love fucked up dynamics (hence why I watch the show lol) and the chemistry was OFF THE CHARTS, and I also think there is something distinctly dark and fucked up and Very Supernatural of it to end with Sam holding her in place so Dean can stab her. Like the natural conclusion of anything coming in between Sam and Dean, Dean’s intense hatred of her that stems from jealousy, fucked up crossed wires bond phallic symbol etc., etc., there have been better metas written about this by people who are not me.

14)   Character most like you. Do you identify with them yes/no?

I /think/ I am a Dean-coded Sam-girl, as I am also an eldest sibling with mommy issues who would kill and die for Sam Winchester, but tbh, realistically, I am a combination of Kevin Tran Advanced Placement and the werewolf college student in Bitten who says he gets a workplace romance vibe off Sam and Dean. But tbh, no, I don’t identify with anyone on this show, everyone is fucked up and SHOULD go to therapy but it’s fun to watch them not do that. I think if they hadn’t brought him back, I’d unironically say s4/s5 Chuck is most like me because my job is writing and I do an absolutely mediocre job at it, and I also suck at taking care of myself and also putting on real clothes.

17)   What’s an aspect of SPN people often point to as a flaw that you really enjoy?

The codependency!!! Like... it’s the point of the show. The premise of a show cannot be its flaw. Like if Sam and Dean were normal, healthy brothers, with normal boundaries, there wouldn’t actually be a show anymore and that’s /why/ they only really hint at breaking that codependency in the finale (depending on how you interpret the finale/heaven reunion, I guess). If they did it any sooner, the show would fall apart. The reason I always came back to Supernatural was because Sam and Dean’s relationship is one of the most interesting, fucked up things I’ve ever seen in fiction. Like to quote Lisa THEE Braeden, they “have the most unhealthy, tangled up, crazy thing that I've ever seen.”

25)   You can only watch one season for the rest of your life. Which one?

So like my gut answer for this is 4, because it’s the first season I ever saw and it’s my favourite because of a) nostalgia and b) ADAM MILLIGAN (ghoul edition), but to be quite honest, watching S4 without being able to watch the rest would suck for real. 4 is so good because it’s the perfect culmination of everything set up in 1-3 and it’s ALSO setting up 5. Like it’s so tight, the stakes are so good, etc. Standalone, it would just make me miserable like... you’re telling me I have to watch the Sam/Dean hotel room fight and not see them work through All That in S5? NO.

So the actual answer is season 2. Because WHAT A SEASON. Most of the episodes contribute to the bigger season arc, the MOTW eps are excellent, both brothers are grappling with something really significant, I LOVE Azazel’s special children so so so much, and literally name a better two hours of TV than All Hell Breaks Loose.... come ON. Everyone peaked here. The performances, the plot, the aesthetic??? They finally get Azazel but what is the cost? WHAT IS THE COST? It sets up so much for everything to happen later on but it’s such a good, tight standalone season that I can watch it solo forever and feel fulfilled. LITERALLY EVERY EPISODE HITS!! PLAYTHINGS NIGHTSHIFTER BORN UNDER A BAD SIGN HOUSES OF THE HOLY IT JUST KEEPS GOING!!!

30)   Make up a fact about a character and convince me it’s true.

Sam Winchester IS bisexual, that’s why he summons multiple male crossroads demons, that’s why he wants to know about the Crowley/Bobby kiss, that’s why he never identifies as straight and never flips out when anyone thinks he’s gay, that’s why he describes past relationships in gender neutral terms, that’s why he has blurry spouse of ambiguous gender (thank you jarpad king!), that’s why Dean constantly microaggresses him and calls him gay. He and Brady dated in college before Jess, Crowley was fully telling the truth when he said Brady and Sam had a history and he was his demon lover. Brady x Ruby x Sam hell throuple WHEN!!!!! Other evidence that is not damning, but should be considered: can’t sit on chairs normally, calls wreath ‘yummy’, is theatre kid, is bonded w/ English teacher, did take art history course, tension w/ random bartenders, I COULD KEEP GOING.

This is not made up. This is fact. Trust me.

send me supernatural asks please <3

[screensandmelodies-blog]

3 Televsion Shows That Fell Off

By Jared Leal, Anastasia Rafalska and Steven Le

SHERLOCK

By Anastasia Rafalska

“Help me please, I’m on a plane and everyone’s asleep.”

I really like how BBC has interpreted and turned into a movie novels of Arthur Conan Doyle, but honestly, the last episode is just a piece of crap. Some people think it’s a great finish, as Sherlock is revealed as a human, not a detective, but let me explain you something: Sherlock Holmes is the most genius detective in London. He is a legend, he is a person who with just one glance at a piece of paper can recreate an apartment where it was and in seconds determine if there is a weapon in the bag just by analyzing it’s weight, he can predict behaviour of the people couple weeks before.

And now, his character with exceptional intellectual ability is playing in the “real-life quest” done by his sister Eurus, where he was blackmailing by the phone calls from a little girl alone on a passenger plane, where everyone is unconscious apart from her.  I’ m not even taking into account the fact that he could refuse playing this game, as it must be clear to him that something doesn’t add up –the girl doesn’t know where she’s coming from or going, she seems relatively relaxed about the huge passages of time passing between their conversations. Surely he’d be able to deduce that she wasn’t really on a plane, yet he never appears to doubt the veracity of her call, consequently under the pressure Sherlock is almost ready to kill his brother and other people. 

The next important thing: from the second episode we were convinced that Eurus is the most dangerous prisoners in the world and according to Mycroft, she is “an era-defining genius beyond Newton”. She uses a lot of smart words, but if you just take a look on what she is doing during the whole episode, you’ll understand that there is nothing genius or original, there is no sense in her actions.

We love Sherlock Holmes for his deduction, extraordinary cases, unusual things that have a logical explanation, but unfortunately none of it was used in the last episode. 

THE 100

By Steven Le

There were many things in the story of the 100 that captivated us. The 100 is a story based on the post apocalypse of Earth after having radiation spread all over the world killing off mankind like a plague. Mankind had to create an Ark spaceship to send themselves into space to live until the Earth was freed of radiation and become inhabitable again. After 10 long years of living in space, the crew members had made a decision of sending 100 delinquents and misfits down to Earth to ‘test’ if it was safe to inhabit again. Throughout season 1, this plot had captivated many people as we would be following along with Clarke, the leader of the delinquents and see how they would prevail in the trials that await them. From the grounders who were used to the radiation to the surviving humans left in the mountains 10 years ago, seasons 1 to 2 had kept viewers entertained for months.

However, after season 2 was the start of where The 100’s storyline worsened. Throughout season 3 we find out that one of their own went out to look for salvation on Earth, only to become inhabited by an artificial intelligence bot named “Alie”. From this point, the story seemed way more farfetched than it was from the start. Having a mind controlling artificial intelligence infect people’s minds by simply eating a microchip that would attach itself at the back of your neck was just plain unreal and stupid. The affects that this microchip would do to someone was allow them hallucinate throughout their subconscious imagining a city called ‘The City of Light’, where no conflict would happen, and no hate would consume the hearts of man.

However, this was not all to the fall of The 100. After season 3’s crazy plotline, comes the current season, season 4. The plot was briefly touched upon at the end of season 3 where Clarke and the remaining people of the Ark found out that the Earth was doomed to radiation once again. When the problem was explained to their allies, the grounders and the rest of the Arkadian’s, no one had a surprised expression. The Arkadians seemed as though they felt no real imminent danger of possibly getting wiped out by the Earth’s radiation AGAIN! All in all my disappointment with the show currently is that they are lacking in certain details within the story that should be more carefully explained to allow viewers to fully understand the situation at hand. The show should also reveal more emotion as to how distressed our protagonists are feeling towards the current situation in season 4.

THE OFFICE

By Jared Leal

Note: May be difficult to understand without prior knowledge.

Note: I get heated in this one, bear with me and don’t take it too seriously, enjoy…

“Today, smoking is going to save lives.”

The quote by Dwight Schrute (Rainn Wilson) before one of the most outrageous pre-shows I have ever seen, sticks to this day. NBC’s adaptation of BBC’s “The Office” is one of the few shows that I consider a part of me. This comes from its more documentary type of presentation. The setting an ordinary workplace of supposedly ordinary people. The format would include monologues in the form of interviews of each character in between plot points. I’m no nerd, I don’t know if this format has been used before The Office and Parks and Recreation, but it definitely softens that veil of disbelief everyone has when consuming fiction. In other words, it feels real. Mix this with a dry sense of awkward, character-driven humour from its primary comedic engines in Michael Scott (Steve Carrell) and Dwight Schrute, and all I see is my favourite comedy television show of all time.

They glory is there from the very beginning, introducing main characters Michael with his unrelenting but genuine incompetence, Dwight and his arrogant but naïve superiority complex (as far as we think...), and the sustaining unresolved romantic tension of Jim Halpert (Jon Krasinski) and Pam Beasley (Jenna Fischer). This glory is sustained through 7 seasons of wonderful ups and downs that all the characters shared and fought through. Then Michael Scott leaves.

I actually watched the 8th season, the first full season without Steve Carrell as the primary character. Ed Helms’ Andy Bernard takes over Michael’s managing job and the show’s attempts to restore former glory without shamefully replicating it, commence. This season wasn’t good but it definitely wasn’t horrid, but without the driving force of the show, it was evidently missing something. I am actually part of the group of viewers that actually enjoyed Andy and Erin Hannon’s (Ellie Kemper) romance; the previous season setup several subtle but sweet moments which were resolved this season, much to my satisfaction (we’ll get back to this).

Which leads us to the 9th and final season, which I could not bear to complete. I can’t really say how bad it is or even if it is actually bad, but I can say how my optimism was gutted. Introducing a plethora of new characters I don’t care about, this late into the show, is the first mistake. Evidently, I don’t remember their names and don’t have the dignity to search them up, but they were two young office dudes I think. The asshole-ification of Andy was the second mistake: making him act like an ass to his employees and making him neglect Erin (who he worked so hard for) is just not something I saw him doing when he was first introduced in the 3rd season. This of course led to end of their relationship, which I thought couldn’t get much worse until she rebounded onto one of the two new nobodies I mentioned before (for the record, I’m sure they’re nice guys). This is of course is where the thrill was gone completely; actually I stopped before this happened (thanks to Wikia for softening this blow).

So yeah, I guess my disappointment with the show and the fact that I could not receive proper closure to one of my favourite shows of all time got me heated in this post. But the beauty of fiction is that I can choose to stop my suspension of disbelief whenever I want. And I can still enjoy the first seven seasons as I did before because it makes me happy. And I’m crying now, goodbye.

I aint don’t worry.

[miss-m-calling]

Fandom Growth Exchange 2021

Fandoms:

The Marianne trilogy - Sheri S. Tepper

Jutro će promeniti sve | Morning Changes Everything (TV)

Senke nad Balkanom | Shadows over the Balkans a.k.a. Black Sun (TV)

Бeсa ǀ Besa (TV)

Oficir s ružom | The Officer with a Rose (1987)

Dear author,

Hello and thank you for writing for me, and extra special thanks that you’re tackling one of these tiny canons of my heart. :-)

I’m Miss_M on AO3. For all requests, I am asking for fic.

General likes:

-pre-canon, canon, post-canon, canon-divergent, and missing-scene stories

-character-driven as well as plot-driven stories

-fics which mix humor and angst/serious business (when this fits the canon)

-characters at work and play

-group dynamics, family dynamics (including constructed families), professional partnerships, friendships, alliances, rivalries, intimate couples (new lovers/first times as well as long-term/established couples), UST-ridden couples who are not just UST-ridden but connected in other ways too

-irony, snark, humor, angst – all arising from the characters rather than the plot crowbaring it in

-linear, non-linear, and 5+1 stories

-hopeful endings, happy endings, bittersweet endings, “everything is awful but you’re here and maybe I don’t entirely hate that” endings

-worldbuilding

-spiky characters who keep their jagged edges and spikiness in adversity as well as when their lives are going well, square-peg-in-round-hole characters, tough characters with (maybe not so well) hidden vulnerabilities, characters who are their own worst enemies, characters who manage to get over themselves when the occasion calls for it, characters with conflicting values which may or may not be reconciled/resolved, characters who treat each other with respect and as equals even if they hate/annoy/can’t stand/love to dislike each other, characters who may not be exactly friends and may well irritate one another but manage to rub along to get the job done and maybe even grow to care about one another (much to their surprise/reluctance/discomfort), characters who just cannot get along with each other or find common ground

-workplace stories (this can mean anything from an actual workplace/casefic/procedural setting to anything that revolves around the canon world in which the characters live) in which the characters get to be competent

Shippy and smutty likes:

-(where it fits the characters) banter

-competitiveness or antagonism shading into attraction (this tension need not be resolved)

-”oh god why did it have to be you what did I do to deserve this“

-”come here and say it to my face/do that again/kiss me, you motherfucker”

-bickering yet loving couples

-characters who are serious about their romantic interests

-characters who think they are much better at flirtation than they actually are

-characters forced to work together only to prove much more compatible than they initially assumed

-fics which mix an exploration of characters’ professional and everyday lives with shipping

-characters who are incompatible in some important way (they are ideological enemies, cop and criminal, spies from opposite sides, or there has been betrayal!!!), and while they love and/or want each other, they’re not willing to change sides or abandon/compromise their identity/beliefs for the other’s benefit

-I don’t know how better to phrase this than: smut which fits the characters; how does their canon dynamics spill over into hubba hubba stuff?

-sexual scenarios that subvert expectations a little and surprise the characters themselves

-sexual scenarios that contain an element of competition or antagonism

-“this is a bad idea but we’re going for it hammer and tongs”

-not wanting to admit feelings or show vulnerability except oops it happens anyway, whether the characters acknowledge it or not

-characters getting way more into the sex or being more affected by it than they thought they would

-quick and intense sex, slow and intense sex, rough yet willing sex (when it fits the characters), unexpectedly emotional and/or tender sex

-masturbation while thinking of the other half of the ship (or not wanting to think about them only oops there they are in the fantasy!)

-first time sex

-established relationship, we-know-each-other-so-well sex

-”we’ve both wanted this and now we both know it so here we go diving in headfirst” sex

-for het and/or slash, oral, vaginal, anal incl. pegging, manual (ifyouknowwhatImean) – all is good. You can go as veiled or as explicit as you like, but please avoid excessive medical jargon – I don’t find a lot of mention of “penis” or “clit” sexy.

Ship/smut DNWs:

MPREG, A/B/O, knotting D/s, formalized BDSM, painful sex, hard kinks (holding someone down playfully, hair pulling and such like, the odd spank are a-OK) scat, watersports knife/gun/blood play incest deaging/infantilization, mommy/daddy kink under-16yos in sexual situations humiliation body distortion/horror (feeding/weight kink, come inflation, vore, etc.) unrequested ships/pairings soulmates and soul marks pregnancy and children (can be mentioned if canon, just don’t make the whole fic about them) wedding setting/theme secondary characters shipping the main pair like it’s their job xeno, tentacles, bestiality noncon/dubcon

Other DNWs:

torture and abuse (this and noncon/dubcon can be mentioned, but please don’t dwell on it in loving detail or subject any of my requested characters to it) descriptions of vomit, shit, and piss (”He pissed up against a tree” and the like is fine), toilet humor lots of gore/blood (mention it, yes; lovingly describe it, no), cannibalism, serious illness or injury character bashing genderswap/genderbent characters, characters as kids/young teens issuefic, gender/sexuality/race/ethnicity/religion/ability/identity headcanons death of requested characters hopeless, unrelenting gloom/angst/horror RL holiday setting/theme, RL religions as a major theme (invented fictional holidays and rituals are fine) reference to RL current events 1st and 2nd person POV unrequested crossovers or fusions AUs which have nothing to do with canon fic written in lapslock

Requests:

The Marianne Trilogy - Sheri S. Tepper

Marianne Zahmani, Makr Avehl Zahmani, Aghrehond, Therat, various combos thereof

What is this canon: Low fantasy, feminist trilogy about Marianne, a student at an American university who comes from the tiny, fictional country of Alphenlicht, wedged in between Turkey and Iran, with a native religion that vaguely resembles Zoroastrianism, a long tradition of both light and dark magic, and civil conflict with echoes of the Cold War (one part of the country seceded with Soviet help). Marianne is financially dependent on her abusive older brother Harvey, but trying to assert her independence. Then she meets Makr Avehl, a cousin and de facto president of Alphenlicht, who’s both a mage and a charmer. And then Marianne gets targeted by dark magic and has to become self-assertive and figure out how to save herself, even as Makr Avehl also tries to save her (and sweep her off her feet), often with more complicated results than he intended. Every book introduces a different set of magical challenges, most of which transport Marianne to a different constructed/magical realm, with disturbing parallels to the cruelties of the real world and some interesting meta commentary on gender relations. Also in the mix are Aghrehond, Makr Avehl’s loyal retainer, chauffeur, and all-around kind soul, and Therat, an intense young mage in training.

The books came out in the late 1980s and were reprinted in a one-volume omnibus edition. They’re long out of print now, but you might find them at your library or used copies for sale online.

While I have a like-get-annoyed relationship with most of Tepper’s work I’ve read, I adore this trilogy unreservedly. I love the mixture of dark fantasy, sly humor, creepiness, complex magical systems and surreal constructed/parallel/hidden worlds described in just enough detail while remaining, for lack of a better word, magical, the intersection of old and new and invented worlds… I adore Marianne, whose lives (it makes sense in context) have made her many things: the traumatized yet defiant survivor, the semi-skillful player of the game of life and magic, the lover and wife and mover-and-shaker in her own right. Her relationship with the other characters – romantic, sometimes overbearing, arrogant, yet loving and lovable Makr Avehl; intense and dedicated Therat; loyal, warm, kind, humorous Aghrehond – are so rich and wonderful. I love all the playing with and inverting and deconstruction of tropes and cliches, the aforementioned magical/constructed/parallel worlds of whimsy and creepiness that riff on ordinary aspects of the real world while also running on their own internal logic…

Canon-specific DNWs: Harvey or Madame Delubovoska appearing in the fic (you may mention them); focusing on Marianne’s pregnancy or on her and Makr Avehl’s daughter; anything over M rating for sex

Some prompts:

Any/all of these characters visit the Cave of Light and then try to solve a problem or complete a quest (however grand, mundane or cracky) according to its message.

Road trips with Aghrehond – exploring Alphenlicht and/or magical realms.

Marianne said at the end of the last book that Therat may be surprised – I’d love to see what might surprise Therat, in addition to Marianne and Makr Avehl’s firstborn sharing her name. Or give me Makr Avehl having to work closely with Therat due to some magical/mystical/political issue, given that he’s always dropping unsubtle hints about her scary eyes. Or Aghrehond being deferential yet unintimidated by Therat – and maybe even making Therat laugh.

Any/all of these characters end up visiting fields on the board-game from book 3 which the book didn’t describe – what kind of a place do they encounter? What (probably dangerous, troubling, and/or creepy) adventures do they have?

Marianne promised to meet Queen Buttercup for a meal at Frab Junction’s Marveling Galosh – magical promises are serious things, so what happens when Marianne has to make the date and the others come to save her and possibly get in each other’s way more than they help?

I loved how canon gently sent up Makr Avehl’s image of himself as Marianne’s protector/lover/white knight in the first and third books’ magical worlds. Actually, Makr Avehl as the Freudian chimera in book 1 and as the hapless hero in book 3 are my favorite things about this canon, beside the general worldbuilding and Marianne’s character development. So I’d love to see more variations on that theme - Makr Avehl as Marianne’s hero, both swoony and ridiculous, gentle yet lecherous, intense and funny with it - either in the real world or in some new (and sinister) magical realm (you can tell that I would love worldbuilding for this canon).

As a general note, I do ship Marianne/Makr Avehl, but I would prefer any shippiness to remain at the books’ level, so nothing too explicit and nothing that overwhelms the non-shippy plot, please. I’m more into this canon for the worldbuilding and the inventive magic, and I like how the books mix the shippiness with adventure, magical horror, and often-meta humor. Oh, and I would prefer not to have Harvey Zahmani or Madame Delubovoska appear in the story – they can be mentioned, just no walk-on parts for them please. Walk-on parts for Marianne’s parents or aunt, or for Makr Avehl’s sister are fine.

Jutro će promeniti sve | Morning Changes Everything (TV)

Anđela Knežević, Aleksandra “Saša” Tomić, Ivona Spasić

What is this canon: one-off Serbian TV show, 39 episodes in total. A slice-of-life drama that follows one year (even though it was all filmed in spring and summer, and it shows) in the lives of four thirtysomethings in contemporary Belgrade, dealing with life issues common to that generation but also specific to being a still-young, educated, professionally and existentially frustrated person living in Serbia today. The main characters are: Filip, a programmer who’s lived in the US for several years and kicks off the show by coming home for what’s supposed to be a vacation but turns out to be a permanent stay; his sister Anđela, who’s finishing her PhD, expects to get a permanent teaching position at the University of Belgrade, and has a nice, steady boyfriend she’s bored of, not least because she eventually figures out she’s not straight; Anđela’s roommate Saša, who starts the show running a bar and running through men like Kleenex, and gradually reveals her issues and vulnerabilities; and their friend Ljuba, who’s from a small town, works in a gym, and pinballs between several girlfriends in part because he’s homeless and needs a place to crash. A major supporting character is Ivona, Ljuba’s on-again, off-again girlfriend whom none of Ljuba’s friends like due to her severe personality.

You can watch the whole show here (free account needed).

Listen, this is my show. I feel it in my bones. I rewatch it at least once a year, and I always get so immersed and then wish there were more, even though I respect the showrunners’ decision to let it end with a kind of low-key “and the adventure (their lives) continues…” vibe. So I would be delighted with pretty much anything you choose to write! I am only asking for the female characters because I find them especially rich and interesting, and their dilemmas and problems especially poignant. Feel free to write something funny (that specific city humor!), something with a sad or melancholy or happy or totally open ending, something with or without a plot, a character vignette, a slice of life… All of those would fit the show’s mood and narrative arc. Also, as much local color and detail as you want to work in, I would love love love, especially if it’s from the proverbial krug “dvojke” – and if you want to write the fic in Belgrade Serbian (all the slang! all the cultural references that people born in the 1980s would know!), or include some phrases/words/lines of dialogue in it, I would probably dance a literal jig of joy and celebration.  

Canon-specific DNWs: explicit smut (M rating and/or fade to black is fine); Saša/Filip-centric fic; fic centering only on Ivona’s pregnancy and/or baby; soapboxing about Balkan history/conflicts/ethnic relations

Anđela:

-Anđela in Iceland. Dealing with culture shock, especially when she least expects it. Making friends with her African roommate – two people’s experiences of culture shock clashing and/or meshing. Trying to date or hook up with girls in a society that’s a lot less homophobic but also less familiar in every way than Serbia. The emigrant’s inescapable sense that something’s missing: adjusting to her new life and homesickness, knowing why she left but wishing things could be different anyway. Or, it’s the end of Anđela’s postdoc year and she has to decide (again): now what?

-After her year in Iceland, Anđela moves in with Saša again. How has their relationship changed and how has it stayed the same? If she decides to make a go of staying in Serbia, what are Anđela’s career prospects? Anđela’s canon arc is all about figuring out what to do when your life and what you want out of it turn out very differently than you always assumed they would, so it would be cool to see her forge a career path that uses her education and professional skills in unexpected ways.

-She runs again into some of the people who shaped her decision to leave in the first place: Darija, Marta, Miroslav, the two lecturers who squeezed her out of the Psychology Department… Those encounters are not easy or even pleasant, but they give Anđela something important nevertheless: closure or…?

-Of all the main characters, Anđela has the most intense connection to places, like when she rides her rental bike around the city before she leaves for Iceland, or how she’s often framed as being alone in spaces even when there are other people present (the moving-in party, many of her scenes at the university and in Studentski park). Give me more of Anđela just taking in and experiencing a place, whether that’s Belgrade or Iceland or wherever she goes after Iceland.

Saša:

-AU where Saša is the one that goes abroad at the end of the show. What drove her to it? Where does she go and why (or at least, what’s her excuse for visa purposes)? How does it go – does she stay abroad permanently, or does she come back after a while?

-Saša’s half-sister moves to Belgrade to attend FLU (the art academy) and moves in with Saša after Anđela goes abroad. They learn to be friends and sisters and roommates. They grieve the loss of their father in their own as well as in shared ways. There’s a generation gap, despite Saša’s cool-girl persona – how do they navigate it?

-More of Saša and Ljuba running their restaurant. I’d love either something dramatic (someone’s trying to force them to pay protection money or force them out of their rented space, a kitchen incident happens and there are hungry people waiting…), or a totally mundane, cozy vignette (putting together the menu for next week, chef Ljuba absolutely must have this one ingredient and he wants it from Bajlonijeva pijaca because they may charge 350 dinars but quality matters – and Saša really doesn’t see why they can’t just go to Tempo…) It would also be cool to see more of Dina, the high-strung but pretty cool manager at the restaurant where Saša and Ljuba worked before they opened their own place.

-Saša and her mom Svetlana have the hardest time being kind to each other, and it’s not for lack of love. Sometimes people just can’t get along easily. How do they get along not-easily after the ways in which canon changed them both?

-I’m not really interested in Saša/Filip, but you can include that canon ship in whatever you’re writing. Just please don’t make the whole fic be just about the ship.

Ivona:

-I may be the only person who’s watched this show who actually likes Ivona. I love her self-possession, how she is absolutely herself and doesn’t bother to pretend otherwise even if it annoys or makes others uneasy, and she’s arranged her life in a way that works for her. I also love her brief flashes of vulnerability and even relaxation. Maybe a day in her life as a career woman and single mom, either with or without her nice boyfriend and/or Ljuba being around? Re: my blanket DNW for fic revolving around babies and pregnancy – you can include Ivona’s pregnancy and motherhood in the fic, just please don’t make the whole fic be just about that.

-Ivona takes her dog Marlena to a dog show. She has to be very cool and serious, and is like that by nature, but it’s exciting when her dog wins something!

-Ivona interacts more with Anđela and/or Saša. They were once very incompatible roommates, maybe that’s how Ljuba met Ivona in the first place? They happen to just hang out one time, and they won’t ever be friends but maybe they can find some common ground? Saša especially dislikes Ivona and judges Ljuba’s involvement with her, and Ivona’s aloofness and humorlessness can make her seem harsher than she perhaps is – it would be interesting if those two could maybe learn not to dislike each other quite so much.

Senke nad Balkanom | Shadows over the Balkans a.k.a. Black Sun (TV)

Andra “Tane” Tanasijević & Stanko Pletikosić

What is this canon: Serbian historical crime drama set in the interwar era. Loads of characters, the city of Belgrade and the Kingdom of Yugoslavia itself being almost characters in their own right, plot twists all over the place, people’s allegiances changing on a dime, murder mysteries, the drug trade, and the illicit pursuits of both rich and poor influencing the RL course of some major events. For comparison, think Babylon Berlin but, like, super Balkan. Two seasons so far, 10 episodes each, set in 1928 and 1934, respectively, with a third season currently in production, set to tackle the early days of World War II. The two leads are a fun variation on the old cop-young cop trop. Old cop is Andra Tanasijević (Tane), veteran homicide investigator, also veteran of World War I, (semi-)alcoholic, cynical, terminally unimpressed by everything and everyone (himself included), but still with a white knight streak he can’t seem to suppress even when it gets him in trouble. Young cop is Stanko Pletikosić, war orphan, trained abroad in forensic science, earnest, sometimes snarky, wet behind the ears but by mid-S1 he starts to get more streetwise without losing all of his idealism. Together They Fight Crime! Also get tangled up with all sorts of criminals, spies, government operatives, and shady dames, while they try to set the world and history straight.

The second season is available here, and the first one can be found, ahem, torrenting around.

All I want in fic for this canon is MORE. More canon-style shenanigans, more of that rich atmosphere, more historical detail, just MORE. Play with the canon however you like! Plot out a case fic! Embroil the two detectives in more historical goings-on, either before WWII, during it, or even after it! The show tends to reassert ontological inertia so historical events always fall into place as they did IRL – you can work with that, or go ahead and change the course of history (rather, have Tane and Stanko do it)! Have them interact and likely get in trouble with some of the other characters! (I am fond of the entire cast, especially Pršo, Stanko’s grandfather, all the Jatagan Mala folks, everyone who works at Glavnjača, the entire Macedonian mafia, all the historical characters – yes, all of them, even the really nasty pieces of work benefit from their actors’ commitment to the role. I would especially love for some of the supporting female characters – Mara, Mina, Violeta, Jana, Sonja – to get a chance to shine, or kick ass, or get their own revenge/heart’s desire, or even just fuck shit up and get in other characters’ way.) Or you could just have Tane and Stanko drown their troubles and shoot the shit in a tavern long past last call!

I would be happy for their dynamic to be what it was when they first met, all rubbing each other the wrong way and reading each other wrong (and sometimes right), or what it becomes later, when they’re a crack team even if they sometimes get on each other’s nerves big time. If you’re writing a case fic, feel free also to bring in Božidar Zečević, Stanko’s S2 partner, at least while he was along for the ride as a fellow investigator, before his role in the plot is revealed. I was very amused by his and Tane’s mutual animosity, very “the missus and the ex” over who gets to call Stanko his partner. (Also Zečević was totally in love with Stanko, come on!)

If you wanted to include some dialogue or phrases or hey write the whole fic in any dialect of what used to be called Serbo-Croatian, I’m here for that with bells on!

Canon-specific DNWs: Tane/Stanko; focus only on smut or ships (you can include the characters’ canon or invent non-canon ships, I just don’t want a fic only about those); anything above M rating for sex; soapboxing about Balkan history/conflicts/ethnic relations (the characters can clash about this, use stereotypes, etc. – I just don’t want the fic to be an excuse for the writer’s hot takes, ‘kay?)

Бeсa ǀ Besa (TV)

Petrit Koci

What is this canon: crime drama, one 12-episode season so far, produced in Serbia with dialogues in Serbian, Albanian, and English, and created by Tony Jordan of “Hustle” fame. Set in (and with a cast including actors from) several ex-Yugoslav states, the story follows three main characters: a Serbian family man and regular joe who accidentally kills the daughter of a major Kosovar Albanian crime boss in a car accident; said Albanian crime boss, who coerces his daughter’s unwitting killer to start working for him as an assassin; and a half-Albanian, half-Serbian Interpol agent who’s after the crime boss but starts investigating the regular joe turned assassin as well.

You can find it on Dailymotion if you search for “BeEp.0[episode number]”

The show has a twisty plot (with one plot hole I would love to get fix-it fic for, see below), gritty and handsome visuals, excellent performances, IMO is really good at depicting the various ethnicities and the complicated history behind the present-day events, and has a great through-line of deconstructing Balkan machismo and patriarchal culture. All three of the main characters have an image of themselves as MEN who Provide and/or Take Care of Business and Put Family First, each in their own way, and all three end up compromising on all their principles by season’s end. The women in the show’s ‘verse sometimes become collateral damage but also assert themselves in unexpected ways, which is great. The title refers to the Albanian (but more broadly, Balkan) cultural concept that one’s promise/vow/word of honor has to be kept and carried out no matter what, at peril of losing face, dishonoring both oneself and one’s family, even death. This gets deconstructed five ways from Sunday too, and it is awesome.

I’m requesting the Interpol agent because I find him to be the most fascinating. He is so committed to being the “good sheriff” and carrying out his professional duty regardless of whom he has to piss off along the way, but is also often quite ineffectual because the local police forces with which he has to cooperate tend to resent both his attitude and his ethnic background – not to mention that when everyone’s corrupt and compromised, the man who refuses to play the game makes lots of enemies. He’s also a real hard-ass who made a conscious choice long ago to have nothing in his life but his work, is a bit of a bastard, has a huge blind spot about gender which comes back to bite him, and ultimately is driven by a desire for personal vendetta more than an abstract commitment to justice (I love a character who is super focused on their goal and presents themselves as invulnerable, yet whose insecurities and traumas are always just beneath the surface of what drives them). And yes, by the end of the season he’s presented with a Faustian bargain and gets a huge target on his back. There’s a lot to unpack there!

I will eat up any local color you want to throw in. Ditto, the canon is super intense, but if you find a way to bring in some vintage Balkan pitch-black humor, I’m here for it. If you wanted to include some dialogue or phrases or hey write the whole fic in any dialect of what used to be called Serbo-Croatian, I’m here for that with bells on! Alas, I do not read Albanian, but if you want to include dialogue/phrases in it, go for it, so long as you tell me (in parentheses, in footnotes, whatever works) what’s going on.

Canon-specific DNW: soapboxing about Balkan history/conflicts/ethnic relations (the characters can clash about this, use stereotypes, etc. – I just don’t want the fic to be an excuse for the writer’s hot takes, ‘kay?)

Prompts:

-Any kind of casefic, either a divergence from S1, something pre- or post-canon, or a side investigation spinning off from the canon’s central plot. Anything that requires Koci to again traipse all over former Yugoslavia, butt heads with everyone, interrogate people, and do that soft-spoken “you don’t want to give me what I want but you’ll do it anyway” thing he does along the way. Maybe he gets a case that seems to have nothing to do with his pursuit of the Berisha clan, is annoyed by this (how dare his bosses expect him to work a case in which he’s not personally invested), but then surprise! There’s a connection between the cases.

-Something that requires Koci to use his knowledge of Albanian language and culture even more than in canon. I love how the canon depicts the existential discomfort of never fully fitting into – or being accepted by – either of the cultures/communities to which one has a connection, and how a person can become antagonistic and volatile as a result. Leaning into that would be wonderful.

-The Petrit Koci we meet at the start of the show has a solid façade of having no one, needing no one, wanting no one in his life. But what we learn about his background along the way (his police-chief father’s murder by the Berisha clan when he was a kid, the ex-fiancée whose family found him “a little too Albanian” for their taste) suggests that there was a lot of repeat heartbreak along the way, like he had to build his hard-ass persona one unpleasant life experience at a time. I would love something that explores his background in more depth – maybe a 5+1 fic, five times Koci let something get to him and one time he refused to care?

-Related to that: we learn a little about Koci’s father (whose murder when Koci was a child is his primary motivator), but we learn nothing about Koci’s mother other than that she’s ethnically Serbian. Is she still alive? What is/was their relationship like once they were alone and relocated from Prishtinë/Priština to Belgrade (in the 1980s, 1990s, 2000s, oh my)?

-Koci has devoted his whole life to bringing down the Berisha clan. He finally gets his wish. Now what the fuck does he do (with himself)?

-I was really struck by the one scene of Koci talking to Skënder Berisha – everything about the past history between the Koci and Berisha families, but especially Koci’s line that his late father didn’t believe in blood vendettas, but he (Koci) does. The end of the season implies he might go totally rogue, because if he can’t bring down the Berishas through the law, there are other ways. Tell me how this goes. In general, tell me your version of S2, there’s other stuff (ahem, spoilers) at the very end of S1 that suggests more trouble is coming down the pike.

-The one glaring plot hole which made me want to throw stuff is when Koci repeatedly dismisses one suspicious development as “oh that guy was lying because he’s cheating on his wife, nothing to see here.” I hate it when smart characters act dumb because the plot needs to keep going for however many more episodes. This does come back to bite Koci by season’s end, but I’d love to see it go a different way.

-Ship fic? Yes to ship fic! I would love either gen or ship fic for Koci paired with any of the following characters. Maybe the other character has to turn to Interpol for help/becomes a material witness/gets arrested/enters witness protection, or otherwise has to do teeth-clenched teamwork with Koci. If any of those dynamics turn porny, the antagonism and complicated dynamics and maybe a reluctant recognition that they’re not so different would perpetuate themselves in the porn too, and I’m here for it. (For this canon, I’m waiving my dubcon blanket DNW, but for M/F ships I want both to be motivated by anger/revenge/general existential bleakness instead of or as well as lust – so no M/f dubcon, please):

Uroš Perić – the regular joe turned assassin, who gets multiple chances in the course of the show to seek Koci’s help and doesn’t because he gets in deep and wants to be the guy that protects his family and takes care of everything himself. I keep thinking back to their very first scene, when Koci gives Perić his calling card and tells him to get in touch, and Perić could have done that before he committed his first murder but… didn’t. And then at the end, there’s that huge spoiler setting up S2. Despite becoming a murderer several times over, Perić is a much softer character than Koci, but he doesn’t like getting pushed around either. How would they work together, how would they clash?

Marija Perić – Uroš’s Croatian wife, who has the thankless role of being married to the guy who’s keeping her in the dark about major plot developments, but makes up for it with how she reacts to the hints she gets of Uroš’s continuing troubles as well as getting on Koci’s radar. She’s scared and out of her depth, but she’s also angry and antagonistic when she thinks Interpol is harassing her for no reason. I love the scene where Koci interrogates her and she won’t give him an inch even when he blindsides her with evidence of her husband’s activities – more of that kind of thing, please!

Dardan Berisha – the grieving crime boss and main target of Koci’s obsession (even though it was actually Dardan’s old uncle who had Koci’s father killed decades earlier). They’re both such hard, intense men, in part because they’ve had to be, and the narrative sets them up as mirror images of each other (while Uroš Perić is more a study in how someone becomes hard when circumstances push them to it). Yet while their conflict underpins the whole show, they rarely share a scene. Put them together more; let them fight or y’know *waggles eyebrows*.

Teuta Berisha – Dardan’s wife, who first loses her daughter, and by the end of the season her family is totally blown to smithereens, in part because of how she chooses to assert her agency within the super-patriarchal context in which she lives. She was ambivalent about her marriage before we meet her, and I love how canon events bring out her anger, grief, and quiet steeliness. Also, that moment at her daughter’s funeral when Koci gives her his condolences really hit me – they know they are enemies, but there’s that moment of standoffish respect between them. What if somehow they had to work together? A divergence from the end or any part of S1 would be very welcome.

Divna Dukić – Koci’s Interpol colleague and maybe the only character that likes him. Their dynamic is both very professionally respectful and yet… “flirtatious” may be too strong a word. They obviously have a little thing for each other but choose not to act on it for a whole mess of reasons (he’s an emotional disaster area, she has enough on her plate as a single mom with a shitty ex, they work together). Also, I have a theory that Divna, while seeming loyal, may take her marching orders from one of the criminal elements or maybe from the more corrupt parts of Interpol or the Serbian police. I would love any or all of that to get explored more.

While I do not want them shipped, the conversation at the hospital between Koci and Skënder Berisha is one of my favorite scenes, so if you want to throw those two together more as gen antagonists – yessssss, give it to me!

Oficir s ružom | The Officer with a Rose (1987)

Petar Horvat/Matilda Ivančić/Ljiljana Matić

What is this canon: Yugoslav movie set in Zagreb in 1945, right after the Partisan (communist resistance movement) victory in World War II. Matilda is a young widow whose husband was a little too close to the Croatian fascists and the Nazis, and she herself is too much of a rich bourgeois lady for the new regime’s liking. She runs afoul of Petar, a Partisan officer who threatens her with jail time and having her lavish apartment turned into communal housing – but in the end, Petar only moves his girlfriend Ljiljana into Matilda’s apartment and then starts hanging around more and more himself. Ljiljana is very young, naïve, and unworldly while also being a hardened soldier and true believer in the better future that communism would build, and she adores Petar and develops a very obvious girl-crush (or maybe just a crush) on Matilda, who is both bemused and reluctantly fond of Ljiljana. Matilda and Petar initially treat each other with anger and a kind of amused contempt, then they start to fall for each other. Uh oh – on both the personal and the political level.

You can find the movie floating around various sites with ex-Yu movies, it was/is on Dailymotion too.

I love how this movie is quite gentle with its characters while they deal with violent and horrific world events, how the narrative lets each of them fully embody their class, gender, and ideological self, plays up the conflicts and the barbed humor and the reluctantly-nascent commonalities between them for emotional payoff, and even when they’re happy (or think they are), the times in which they live just don’t allow for anything like a simple HEA. How to improve on canon? Clearly the movie should’ve gone the threesome route! I would love something set either in those early days, when Petar foisted Ljiljana on Matilda as a tenant and basically moved in himself, or a divergence so Ljiljana never leaves Zagreb and the ending isn’t such a complete bummer.

For early-days scenarios, gimme more of the merry war between Petar and Matilda, with Ljiljana’s crush on both of them stirring things up even more. Teasing and fighting and not wanting to admit they actually do get along, while enjoying breakfast for three. People walking in on each other in the shower. More of how, in the movie, Matilda’s apartment is an oasis from the massive changes happening outside, but the world keeps encroaching on the trio’s intimacy anyway. Maybe Petar and Ljiljana discover other elements of bourgeois living they start to enjoy, or they know they shouldn’t care when Matilda has to give some of her creature comforts away or trades them on the black market, but they mind anyway. Or, by painful fits and starts, Matilda adjusts to the new reality; maybe for some reason Matilda has to accompany the other two to the working-class neighborhood where Petar grew up or to Ljiljana’s village, or they bring her along/she gets sentenced to work on a public reconstruction project (radna akcija), and she hates it, but she has people on her side whether she’s ready to see it or not. If you want to write smut, I’m here for three-way sex, or for one of them to egg the other two on or spy on them so they can watch (oops they don’t end up just watching!), and/or for one or two of them to teach the other(s) something they haven’t done before or consider to be beneath them, and everyone enjoys it greatly. There’s great potential here for emotional manipulation and mind games, and I’m here for it.

For a canon divergence from the end, I don’t need a HEA – just don’t let people be dead and/or alone and inconsolable. The historical era was what it was, these characters are who they are (for one thing, Petar is strongly implied to participate in executions of political prisoners). I am good with as much historical detail as you want to throw in, and I’m good with an open-ended or bittersweet or even ominous ending, just so long as it’s not all unrelenting gloom and there is acknowledgment of the attachment between the trio.

If you wanted to include some dialogue or phrases or hey write the whole fic in any dialect of what used to be called Serbo-Croatian, I’m here for that with bells on!

Canon-specific DNW: Ljiljana’s canon pregnancy featuring in the fic; breaking up the threesome into just a series of twosomes in a smut scenario (I’m good with twosomes leading to some kind of three-way scenario, but not twosomes alone); soapboxing about Balkan history/conflicts/ethnic relations (the characters can clash about this, use stereotypes, etc. – I just don’t want the fic to be an excuse for the writer’s hot takes, ‘kay?)