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#i haven't said this to anyone
psilactis · 9 months
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I'm so tired
#Realized these past few weeks that people just.... Don't believe I'm feeling like shit#Like. I'm basically suicidal#I haven't said this to anyone#Not explicitly but I've hinted at it#What I have said however is that I feel like I'm in very real danger of being physically harmed in my current living situation#And that I live closed off in my bedroom to avoid interacting with my abuser#And that it would help immensely if I could just hang out with my friends you know?#Just get out of the house#See human beings that don't drive me into a panic attack by just existing in the same room as me#But everyone basically treats me like I'm insane for being afraid#No one invites me for anything#Everyone is always busy when I seek company#So I just become more and more closed off#I'm in such a depressive funk I'm barely trying to talk to anyone anymore#I just don't have the strength#I'm basically off the radar in every social media and chatting app.#And even the people who I've reached out to and asked for help haven't. Realized#Or cared#I'm so tired of trying to keep going. What even is the point anymore#A few years ago my first therapist told me we aren't supposed to be sad. Not all the time. Not like this#And at the time that gave so much hope that things would get better#But now a days it just freaks me out because it doesn't feel like I will ever be able to feel anything but this.#To exist in any way but this. Alone. No conexions. Only interacting with family who hates me wants me dead or resents me#This isn't even bringing all my health issues into account#Therapy isn't even helping#I'm thinking of quitting#I can only see the money going away and no improvement at all#Personal tag
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fox-mulder-gets-pegged · 10 months
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Time to go monkey mode once more and spend all hours of the night researching VP shunts.
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turnaboutstar · 6 months
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autistic people when there's collectable things with tv shows with multiple generations of them:
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frostinepac3 · 9 months
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How do you draw this mf
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egophiliac · 7 months
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the new ride kamens character is jo, and he's... blood stark and night rogue? he's got the blood stark visor and color, but he's got bat wings which is definitely night rogue, not what i would've expected, i would've thought we'd get evol and kr rogue first as separate characters, but hey, dan kuroto and blood stark are some of my top faves of all time villains, so i'm not complaining
heck YES look at this steam-powered and yet somehow cyberpunky batman. he's awesome! 🦇 and honestly given that the popular guess for him was Night Rogue, I think it's pretty funny that he ended up being (mostly) the other Faust guy (I admit I usually associate him with the Evol form and...kind of forgot about Blood Stalk a little bit. :')
augh I am so BEHIND on drawing the Wisdom Thinks guys, hold on let me fix this
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also I really hope they get way into the nitty-gritty of them running the lounge. nothing is funnier to me than Dramatic Action Superheroes having to take time out of their day to balance their business ledger and figure out the employee rotation for the week and stress about scheduling their upcoming food safety inspection. it's great.
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altruistic-meme · 1 year
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one thing i want to make certain we are all clear on, as i see more and more theories coming out already in the wake of go2, is that you can love and enjoy many different theories- even contradictory ones! 
i read one theory that made so much sense to me and i could see all of their points as laid out and i loved the idea of it and how it would come to be. and then i read a different theory that directly contradicted a lot of what was said in the theory i loved, and i loved this new theory too!! it was much more relaxed and didn’t have as many specific points to it, but it was fun and i could see it and i thought the idea of it was a joy!!!! 
the good thing about theories is that we have no actual idea which one is true, so we can delve into all these different possibilities!!! and we can look at them and see the truth or possibility in all of them. and liking one theory doesn’t mean that you are only allowed to think this one is true! 
so if you see me posting completely contradicting theories and saying “i fully believe in this” about both of them, there’s nothing wrong with that :)
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beanghostprincess · 3 months
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Nirei and Sakura are NOT beating the "unconditionally in love" allegations. In fact, they're just proving to be in love over and over again with each chapter
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bilaudad · 3 months
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experimenting with more simplified or cartoon styles, and practicing not being afraid of color and not being so self-conscious showing the process
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moonkhao · 1 month
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hi.
#i know most of you didn’t even realize i was gone#but man…#my mental health was like in a state of 📉📉📉 in the past 30 days like we love being mentally ill and fucking insane <3#it was mostly bc i panicked and started obsessing over possible water damage in my flat kind of out of nowhere#like it started when my landlord came to check my bathroom bc my downstairs neighbours had water stains on their ceiling back in july#which had been caused by their shower curtain apparently but i was already spiraling when my landlord told me so i was sure it was my fault#i was assuming it was bc of me bc i had sometimes been spilling some of my bathwater and i was like WHAT IF IT HAS GONE THROUGH THE FLOOR?#and it didn't help that it has been hot af and very humid in my apartment LIKE WELL OVER 25 DEGREES AND 60% HUMIDITY#anyways i couldn’t shake this not matter what i tried and my fucking insane brain made me think i was going to get arrested for like#flooding the whole building or for causing some sort of mold infestation#i had SO MANY panic attacks; i wasn't able to sleep; i wasn't able to eat; i was on edge and panicky basically 24/7 so fun fun fun :D#and i kept waking up in the middle of the night and HAD to go check my walls or the space below my kitchen#it was compulsory like i couldn't not get up and go check and tbh i would've thrown out all of my furniture if i could've to check for mold#(and shhhh i know how fucking insane this sounds but having a mentally ill brain that's anxious all the time does suck ass sometimes 🥲)#(the worst thing about it tho was that i was SO AWARE of how insane about this i was being and yet i couldn't stop losing my mind over it)#(also i was so ready to move tf outta here bc i couldn't handle being triggered 24/7 which is why my mom let me stay with her last week )#i was so out of it that i couldn't even let myself do the things i usually enjoy... like at all#like watching my shows or spending any ungodly amount of time on tumblr... or replying to messages i got from people who i love#ig this goes to show HOW bad this actually was for me mentally bc usually tumblr and my shows are like my safe place#anyways we finally had a leak detection dude come over today and we had him check the water levels in my walls#and he said everything is fine and he specifically told me i should stop worrying about any water damage BC THERE IS NO WATER DAMAGE#he also said that the weather has just been insanely humid this year so it's not surprising that the humidity levels are higher than usual#i’m still a bit scared about some possible mold but ig this is good enough for now#i am aware how ridiculous this must sound for anyone who's reading this now but couldn't let it go not even with meds so let me live pls :(#TLDR I WAS GOING THROUGH IT BUT I AM BACK I THINK AND I AM MOST LIKELY GOING TO START BOTHERING YOU WITH MY GIFS AGAIN <3#AND I JUST REALIZED I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN ANY OF THE HEART KILLERS STUFF YET ASIDE FROM ONE OR TWO PICS LIKE :(#OH AND I NEED TO START WATCHING SUMMER NIGHT ;_;#sabrina talks#@AIRENYAH GIRL I AM SO SORRY I WILL PROBABLY REPLY TO YOUR MESSAGES LATER TODAY OR TOMORROW MORNING ;_;<3
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royalarchivist · 1 year
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Tazercraft and Richarlyson: [ Talking about the butterfly effect that led to Cellbit and Roier getting married ]
Richarlyson: The real cupid is pa Mike.
Pac: If Mike was unintentionally the reason why Richas died*, and that caused Roier and Cellbit to— Wait, you're saying I'm single because you died?! Oh what the hell. No, it's fine, that's fine, that's fine, it's fine, I stayed on the ground so that others could fly, it's fine.
Richarlyson: KKKKKKK Pa, you misunderstood me 0_0
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Hetalia ‘I want a baby’ meme
Russia - America
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Sweden - Finland
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England - France
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Belarus - Liechtenstein
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Prussia - Canada
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Italy - Germany
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Poland - Lithuania
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Romano - Spain
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Denmark - Norway
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Austria - Hungary
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lafragolina · 10 months
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just kill me
#this whole article is bad but this was the WORST#not even for the reason you think (819 reasons)#Eliza you've already heard this rant but#if I can be way too sincere and long-winded for a moment#'always if I ask him something he helps'#how many quotes do we have from teammates over the years saying that exact thing#michael latta saying 'it doesn't matter if you're a top pair dman or a 4th line peasant; he'll do anything to help you'#christian djoos saying 'he's always there for you no matter what time or place. if something's up he's always there'#HHA saying recently nicke gave him his number and told him 'if you need anything just call me and I can help you'#carly in that interview when this was announced saying how nicke has been the support for everyone in that locker room from himself and osh#to guys who haven't been there long like strome and even pacioretty#I know holts and batya and andre and rasmus and jojo and tj and tom and karl alzner have all said stuff like this too#and that's just who I can think of off the top of my head#like. that's it. that's nicke.#if you ask him something. he helps.#for such an amazing athlete. for such a crucial part of making hockey A Thing in DC.#what his teammates want to talk about is his kindness#and that speaks so highly of him and is so genuinely admirable to me and worth aspiring to#I don't want to put anyone on a pedestal because we don't know these guys#but like. in terms of impact. nicke really genuinely made me try to be a better more thoughtful more actively outreaching friend#because I saw the way his teammates talked about him and that's how I want to be thought of.#I want people to know I'll be there for them. & not that I haven't been willing to do that but I've been more active about offering it#and part of that genuinely is because of his example#there's a million other things about his kindness I could mention before I even get to his hockey but this has already gone on far too long#so anyway#he is so dear to me#I hope he is happy and healthy#and that he knows how loved he is#nicklas backstrom#hockey
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danwhobrowses · 4 months
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One thing I think might fly under the radar with some of the Bells Hells' new outfits are that Ashton, Fearne and Imogen each seem to have added a Sun and/or Moon motif
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Imogen mostly opts for moons given her greater connection to Ruidus but there's also the sun, while Fearne has a sunflower (she also has her lantern but that was there on earlier designs) - which seems to have had a bit of additional attention among the other flowers given it's ring of air around it - on her hoof, and Ashton has a belt and leg accessory that look like they could be a sun and moon. Chetney doesn't have many motifs because his design is quite practical, but as a werewolf he does have a visual tie to the moon anyway.
To add to this, there may also be a third motif of wind, or at least the sky; Dorian's cape and instrument have a morning dawn kind of gradient, whereas Laudna's gradient represents the night sky, in the middle you have Orym, whose wind parallels are quite simple given the Zephyr armor and being an Air Ashari.
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Intentional? Maybe not, but it does look like there's an elemental theme going on too which is, if intentional, very underrated.
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cellgatinbo · 1 year
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BWAHAHA cellbit's trying to chase bad out of his castle "I'LL MAKE A LIST OF 10 SWEAR WORDS IN ALL LANGUAGES AGAIN" and chat's just spamming "SEX FACT NUMBER ONE: "
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cerise-on-top · 5 months
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Can I request Rudy (maybe AleRudy poly??? You decide lolz) x a female ( you can choose not to write this as I know you write mostly gender neutral) reader who proves The Whole toxic masculinity thing wrong as a strong (physically and mentally) independent woman? Like she is strong and can defend herself and she does things that most men thinks she can’t do? (Like carrying heavy things, etc.)
Thank you!!
Hello! This is more Rodolfo centric, which I hope you don't mind! But Alejandro is there too, of course :>
AleRudy with a Strong!Independent!Fem!S/O
Alejandro would have a field day with you, Rodolfo would still be a little bit concerned. Though, that is not to say he wouldn’t like it. I think you’d be a certain kind of awakening for him, especially if you’re pretty muscular too. Rodolfo would have never thought he’d find a muscular woman this hot, but here we are. Both Alejandro and Rodolfo would sometimes have conversations about you when you’re at work. Alejandro would know just how capable you are and would allow you to do just about anything, even if he would offer you his help. Nothing wrong with helping your lovely girlfriend lift some heavy things as it gets done a bit faster that way. Rodolfo wouldn’t believe you to be weak, not in the slightest. Especially not with your kind of personality and body, but he’d still insist on him doing some of the things at first, such as carrying heavy things or scaring away some sleazebags. He’ll tell you a little bit about how he views the world, how he’s supposed to be the one protecting you, but when you just laugh and tell him that you can handle yourself, he actually gets kind of embarrassed. At some point he’ll realize that yes, indeed you can handle yourself in just about any situation life throws at you, but that doesn’t mean he won’t voice his concerns. Picking him up is actually kind of fun, he’ll go completely quiet and hold onto your shoulders for dear life. At first he’d feel kind of bad, he’s the one who’s supposed to pick you up. But, as mentioned previously, you being this strong actually does things to him. It would take a while, but he’d come to trust you more and more with some things that he thought women shouldn’t really be doing. If you work a men dominated job too, then Rodolfo will just shut up, actually. You’re a mechanic? He doesn’t know jack shit about cars. You’re an IT-technician? Computers hate this man, he always needs help since some error comes up. Once the initial embarrassment is over, he won’t hesitate to come to you for help. It’s for the best you work on this since he has no clue what he’s doing in those fields anyway.
Alejandro is super chill with you being strong and independent. Sure, sometimes he’d love to just watch a scary movie with you and have you cling to him in fear, but you carrying those big tires is also pretty nice. He always thought he’d be more into a shy and timid girl, but you’re actually pretty nice too. He wouldn’t fuss over you as much as Rodolfo, he’d just let you do your thing. If you need help, he’ll help, but he won’t be overbearing. Besides, he could probably learn a lot of things from you. You’re an electrician? Awesome, amor! The GFCI just turned off again, could you do something about it? He’ll sometimes talk to Rodolfo about how he should put more trust into you. Just because you’re a girl doesn’t mean you can’t be a total badass and strong like them. Alejandro will also egg you on to pick Rodolfo up since he wants to see him flustered beyond comparison. He loves you both, but there’s just something so fun about a flustered Rodolfo.
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petite-phthora · 1 year
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This yours?
[DP x DC fic]
[Love at first... murder? - part 12]
<< Prev | Next >>
Part 1
Ao3
---
Somewhere else, in a seemingly abandoned building on the outskirts of the city, a figure shrouded in darkness and wearing a dark cloak plots.
In front of them is a whiteboard. It’s covered in pictures, sticky notes, and illegible texts. Some of the notes thrown about that are legible are ‘fight…’, ‘draw blood.’, and ‘DEATH!!!’.
There’s a crude stick figure drawn in the corner of the board, it’s impaled. Other small doodles can also be found all around the board.
Most of the information and pictures are connected by red strings, like you see in movies.
In the middle is a picture of 2 people sitting on a motorcycle, the arms of the person sitting in the back are around the waist of the person sitting in the front. The picture has some arrows pointing towards it and the people in the picture are very obviously circled.
Though the face of the person driving the motorcycle is obscured by their helmet, the other person seems to be heavily blushing and grinning broadly.
“Yes… yes! That’s it! I know what to do…” They seem to be speaking to themselves.
Quickly, the person scribbles down a barely legible ‘sacrifice!!‘.
They start cackling.
“Mwuahaha!”
It’s an evil laugh they’ve been working on for quite a while now, and they’re pretty proud of it.
However, the effect is slightly ruined when a fly enters their mouth, cutting off their cackling with choking as they gasp for air, grasping at their throat.
A few good thumps against their chest, with some coughing out their lungs, helps them dislodge the fly from their throat and they spit it out on the ground. They take a few deep breaths before straightening up again.
“Curse you” the person exclaims, angrily waving their fist at the fly as it flies away.
---
Bruce’s face gives off nothing as he stares at the streets down below. He’s dressed as Batman, crouched at the edge of a building with Damian by his side as Robin. Spoiler, Black Bat, Nightwing, and Red Robin are further back on the rooftop.
They watch in silence as another group of the Joker’s goons passes by. They’ve been all over the city, wandering around, not doing anything obviously illegal.
They don’t stay in one place and they don’t seem to have much of a purpose. No attacks… No stealing… No smuggling or transport of goods… No, instead they’re inspecting every single inch of the city.
They don’t seem to have any weapons on them. All they’re carrying on them are some flashlights. While most don’t give anything away with their body language or expressions, some seem to give off a bit of anxious energy.
Spoiler claimed she even saw some of them climb down into the sewers earlier and then climbing out again sometime later somewhere else, but this time ‘dejected and stinky’.
One thing seems clear to the Bats.
They’re searching for something… or someone.
“This basically confirms that not even the Joker’s henchmen know where he is. He’s missing.”
“I’m not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing”
“Good… thing?”
“It’s… something. That’s for sure.”
“We don’t know if he’s really missing. For all we know it could be a trap. What if the Joker is hiding, pretending to be missing to have us bring our guard down? Besides, how could he be missing? He’s the Joker. No one’s just gonna kidnap him”
“For all we know he could be lying dead in a ditch somewhere”
“I highly doubt that”
“Everyone, focus” Bruce speaks up, having them draw their attention to him.
“It’s unclear whether the Joker is simply hiding away or missing. Instead of focusing on the why, we need to focus on the where. Missing or not, we need to find him and get him back to Arkham. Oracle, have you managed to find out anything from the footage yet?”
“Nope, still nothing. All the files from the moment he enters Crime Alley are wiped and any attempt at recovering them only brings back corrupted files.”
 “We need Red Hood. Where is he?” Bruce asks.
“He still has his phone on silent and he has removed the trackers and cams. We haven’t placed any new ones on him yet”
“Let’s visit him on his turf then. And keep an eye out for anything suspicious in the meantime. Oracle, try recovering the missing files. If that doesn’t work, go back to the breakout footage. Perhaps he left some kind of clues about his plans or whereabouts behind there.” Bruce states.
“Roger that.”
---
Red Hood has his arms by his sides as he gazes down upon the street below from the rooftop of a random apartment building in Crime Alley.
He’s lucky to have avoided the Bats so far. But he doubts his luck will last for long.
Red Hood stiffens as he suddenly feels something clamp down on his arm. As a reflex, his other hand has already drawn his gun.
He slowly raises the arm he felt something clamp down on and looks at it, only to make eye contact with a girl with black hair and blue eyes who has sunk her teeth into his arm and is now hanging off of it.
The teeth are sharp, as the girl seems to have some small fangs. They’ve gone through his jacket and sunken into his skin.
It doesn’t really hurt all that badly though, probably hasn’t even drawn much blood, and that’s one of the only reasons Jason hasn’t flung the kid off of him yet. Another reason is the fact that it’s a kid.
They both stare at each other for several seconds.
As Jason takes her appearance in, he notices that she seems rather familiar. In fact, she looks like a more feminine version of Danny, or if Danny had a twin.
The person hanging off of his arm looks younger than Danny though, probably a teenager around 13 or 14, if he had to make a guess.
Slowly, he puts his gun away and takes out his phone with his other hand, watching the random girl’s eyes follow his movements. He raises it level with her face and snaps a picture, quickly sending it to Danny and ignoring the girl’s curious gaze while she’s still hanging onto his arm by her fucking teeth.
---
Meanwhile, Danny checks his phone to see Red Hood sent him a message. He opens it and is greeted by a picture of Ellie in human form biting down on Red Hood’s arm with the caption ‘this yours???’
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Taglist:
@i-always-say-yea   @uraniumwizard    @why-must-i-be-like-this   @griffinthing
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