#i havent spoken to her since we graduated

[sporksaber]

I saw a little mood board slideshow on tiktok about a fabulous childhoods and was violently reminded of the fact that there was more than one time when people invited every girl except me to their birthday and slumber parties. I only knew about them because whatever group of girls I was sateliting around that day would inevitably ask if I was going. Because I had to be invited, everyone was. But everyone never included me.

[itsays]

i remember when we got a new girl from chile at my catholic school and the whole time she was just having a horrible time because she had never been to catholic school in her life

[mimiatmidnight]

Hold on you mentioned a ninth grade friend the other day, but now you say you didn't have any friends at lunch. So you and Meghan both appropriating loser culture now? 🤔😂

Damn, good catch. Sometimes I forget people actually read my tags 💀 Haha ok so in high school I actually did have a relatively large group of friends (though I didn't feel particularly close to them, which is why I said I felt lonelier in high school even though I was part of a big social circle). Anyways the point is that we often didn't have the same lunch period, in which case yes I really did spend lunchtime in the library. It was actually quite nice. There were some days when I did have some friends at lunch to eat with together in the cafeteria and I kind of yearned for my quiet library time lmao

[smartichokes]

found out a few months ago that one of my old friends from high school had a baby and named it something INCREDIBLY close to my name. unsure how to feel lmao

[thestamp3d3]

yeesh how do i explain to someone why im not friends with a mutual friend anymore

[lilyveselka]

i had a dream last night where i owed the girl i had a crush on in high school a thousand dollars and i woke up thinking it was three years ago

[nataliesfirefly]

You and I Walk a Fragile Line - Farleigh Start x F!Reader - Part 6

a/n: hey guys!! im so sorry this part has taken me so long! im currently on a trip so i havent had much time to write! but i hope this makes up for it, im super excited for yall to read this!!! also i think im going to plan for this series to have a few more chapters, probably max 9 or 10! i love it sm i really dont want it to end 😭 but anyways enjoyyy and comment what you think! and again i apologize if the smut is mid.. btw this is not proofread LMAO

series masterlist

playlist

word count: 4.9k words

warnings: MDNI 18+, smut, fingering, oral (f!receiving), p in v, angst, language, smoking, afab reader

You’re sitting in your bed, reading a magazine, when your flip phone rings. You lean forward to pick it up from the corner of the bed, wondering who could be calling you this late. You raise your eyebrows when you see that it’s Lola. You haven’t spoken to her since school got out. Nevertheless, you answer it and put the phone up to your ear.

“Lola! Hey,” You grin. “Oh my God, I’m so glad you picked up. I’m so bored around here,” She groans, and you smile even bigger at the sound of her voice on the other end. “Around where?” You ask curiously.

“My parents’. I have to babysit my younger sister all the time. It’s exhausting, really,” She moans. “I just want to like, go to a party or something. Honestly, I would even prefer to be going to classes right now instead of this.”

“Wow. That must mean it’s really bad then, huh?” You continue flipping through the magazine, your eyes scanning through the apparently trending fashion and makeup choices at the moment.

“Yes. Ugh. You’re at Saltburn, right?” She asks. “Yeah.” You reply.

“How’s that going?” Lola questions, and you hear another voice in the background that sounds like her, only higher-pitched. “No, I’m on the phone. Go away. Shoo,”

You try not to snicker at her shooing away her little sister. “It’s…” You trail off, trying to decide the right way to describe how the summer is going so far for you. “I don’t know. Different.”

“How so?” You pause and wonder if you should tell her what’s been going on. You decide it’s probably better not to and keep some things to yourself.

“I think it’s just cause we’re growing up. I mean, we graduate in less than two years.” You shrug and reach over to grab your glass of wine. “Oh God, don’t remind me. My parents are still asking me what my plans are,” She sighs loudly.

“I can’t believe it.” You shake your head and close the magazine, uninterested in the latest celebrity drama. An idea suddenly forms in your mind.

“Hey, the Cattons are throwing one of their big summer parties in a few days. I could invite you?” You suggest. You hear Lola gasp. “Really?! I’d love to go. I’ve heard so many stories about the Saltburn parties.” She makes it sound so dramatic, and you giggle.

“And you’d get a chance to see Felix,” You grin as you hear her jumping around. “Yeah, I would! You don’t need to convince me any further. I’ll be there,” She pauses. “Wait, but they’ll let me come, right?”

“Oh, of course. They like me a lot, so I’m sure they won’t mind.” You assure her. “Okay, perfect. Thank you so much, my love. I’ll let you get some sleep. See you soon!” She squeals excitedly and you roll your eyes with a smile as she hangs up.

You set down your phone and sigh, looking around your dim room.

You haven’t been able to get Farleigh out of your mind since your little… moment two nights ago. He’s not avoiding you, but he’s not being nice either. He’s gone back to teasing you and embarrassing you in front of the Cattons. You should’ve known that if you got too close, he’d pull away and return to his old ways.

But every little glance you two share has your stomach fluttering and your heart pounding. Every insult meant to hurt or offend you has the opposite effect. In some depraved way, you like when he degrades you. The past two nights, you’ve laid awake and stared up at the ceiling, trying to relive that night when he made you feel so good. Just the thought of him had your mind reeling. You would do anything just to feel that way again. You’re hooked.

You can’t just keep wallowing in these feelings. You want to talk to him, work things out, and go back to how they used to be a week ago. More importantly, you just want to be in his presence. It gives you some kind of thrill to be around him. It’s like a game of roulette to see which version of him you’ll get each time, and you love it. You crave his attention.

You climb off of your large bed and walk determinedly to your door, opening it quietly and sneaking down the hallway. It’s quite a long walk to Farleigh’s room, but you don’t care. You pass Felix’s room, then Venetia’s. Both of their lights are out, telling you that everyone in the house is probably asleep by now. You can only hope and pray that Farleigh isn’t.

You eventually find yourself standing in front of his room. Dim light peeks through from under his door, and you sigh with relief. He’s still awake. Your decision catches up to you and you realize how stupid it is that you’re about to knock on his door. You shake your head to clear your doubt, raising your hand and gently knocking.

You hear his bed shifting and footsteps following close after. You swallow nervously, your throat suddenly feeling dry. Your heart races with anticipation as he finally opens the door.

Fuck. He’s shirtless with only a pair of sweatpants on. Your eyes trail down subconsciously before you blink and look back up to his face. Is he wearing underwear?

“Hello,” He says, his grin foxlike. “I can’t sleep. Can we talk?” You ask, your voice shaky. You curse yourself for sounding nervous. He crosses his arms and raises his eyebrows. “Talk about what?” He questions.

You pause, unsure of what to say next. What were you going to talk about? He would deny any feelings towards you, so what was the point of even coming here?

“Just let me in, please.” You step forward and avoid his gaze. He steps to the side wordlessly, opening the door further to let you into his room.

You breathe in the familiar scent of that candle he’s always burning, and the scent of his cologne. It’s musky and spicy, with notes of vanilla. You tried to memorize it everytime you were close to him. You walk over to his bed and sit down on the edge, looking up at him as he closes the door behind him.

“Can I have a cigarette?” You ask, pointing to the pack sitting on his bedside table. He nods, and you carefully take one. He hands you the lighter.

He stares down at you as you light the cigarette, taking a drag from it. He chuckles to himself and you exhale, furrowing your eyebrows. “What’s funny?”

“You always said you hated the smell. Yet here you are, asking me for a cigarette,” He replies with a scoff. “Maybe you’re just a bad influence,” You shoot back, and his smile slightly fades.

You can see his eyes traveling down your body, lingering on your thighs and your bare legs. You had outgrown these sleep shorts, but you never cared because you figured no one would see you in them. Well, there goes that.

“Are we not going to talk about the other night?” You mutter. “What’s there to talk about?” He replies, and you roll your eyes. “Are you-” You pause and let out a frustrated breath. “Are you serious?” You exclaim angrily.

“You can’t blame it on being drunk this time, Farleigh.” You tell him, and he freezes, his gaze faltering downwards.

“Can we not talk about that? Let’s just…” He sighs with exasperation and sits next to you. You turn away from him, looking out the window. You decide not to press the issue, since it’s apparently too much for him to think about right now. Honestly, you aren’t even able to fully process what’s been going on between you two.

“Let’s just… talk,” He says finally, and you face him again, exhaling a small cloud of smoke. “Okay.” You shrug. It’s what you both do best: Talking. About anything and everything, despite the strange history of your relationship. You guessed that it was because you had known each other for so long, that it just came naturally. He’s just… real. He’s never pretending or putting on a façade, at least around you he’s not. Around the Cattons, he has to, because to them he’s just the wild child, the comedic relief, the American. You feel like you are the only one that gets to see the real Farleigh, and it feels like a privilege. But you know that’s not true, and you choose to believe it anyway.

“So… Our third year at Oxford,” Farleigh says. You let out a breath and raise your eyebrows. “Can’t believe it’s already been two years,” You both smile, thinking of all the good and bad memories you’ve made so far during your years at university.

“Can I be honest?” You ask, and he nods. “I’m scared.” You say simply. His eyebrows knit together. “Of what?” He replies. “Graduating. You know, I’ll probably go to graduate school or something, but I need to start making my own money. Get a job. Do adult things,” You sigh just at the thought of all the responsibilities. “I can’t be on a scholarship forever. Or have my parents pay forever,” You continue, shaking your head. “I’m putting them through enough as it is.”

Farleigh nods again with a look of understanding. “I might go back to the states. See my mom, maybe stay there for a while.” He says. You can’t help but feel a little sad at the thought of him being away for so long. You hate to admit it, but you would miss him.

“But we don’t have to worry about that right now. You’re too uptight. Let yourself have fun,” He nudges you softly. “I’m trying,” You mutter. “Well, you’re smoking. That’s one step closer,” He laughs a bit and you roll your eyes.

It goes quiet and you stare down into your lap. You can feel his eyes on you, and your heart begins to race with anticipation. That familiar tension returns in the air between you and Farleigh.

You look up slightly, his eyes meeting with yours. Your stomach churns as you look down to see his hand inching towards your thigh, eventually resting on top of it. “I know why you came here,” He says, his voice lowered.

You look back up to him. “What?” You whisper. “Don’t play dumb,” He shakes his head. “I’m not.” You reply, trying hard not to break the intense eye contact.

You gulp nervously and finally look away, your face giving you away and burning red. “Hmm,” He hums, his thumb brushing across your thigh. You try to distract yourself by pressing the cigarette out on the ashtray on his bedside table, watching the little flame burn out.

He gently reaches up and grabs your chin, tilting your head back towards him. He drags his thumb down your bottom lip as you stare into his eyes. He grins slightly before moving his hand to cup your cheek, leaning in closer until your noses brush together. You know you shouldn’t be doing this. You know Farleigh is emotionally unavailable and toxic, and he won’t ever discuss his feelings or yours. But you can’t help but melt into the kiss, his touch, his aura. It’s like he’s magnetic, pulling you in everytime you try to pull away.

Somehow, every single time he kisses you, it’s better than the first time. Your tongues intertwine as your lips move in a perfect rhythm while both of you fall back onto his bed clumsily. One of his hands tangles in your hair, and the one that was resting on your leg moves up to rest on your waist, his fingers caressing your bare skin due to your tank top riding up. He eventually shifts his position so that he’s on top of you, and you turn to lay on your back underneath him.

His kisses begin to move down to your jawline, then your neck. He sucks and licks your skin so cruelly, but you don’t want him to stop. You breathe in the scent of his hair, his curls tickling your face, and you can already feel yourself becoming weak again.

You feel his hands start to trail down your body, resting on your hips, as he moves down the bed and you peer down to see him looking up at you from between your legs. Feverish heat burns across your skin just at the sight of it.

“Wait, wait. I’ve never-“ You start, suddenly feeling nervous. “It’s okay,” Farleigh replies, his eyes soft and warm as he gazes up at you. “Just relax,” He murmurs, gently pulling down your shorts and panties at the same time, shuffling them off your legs.

Just relax, you think. Easier said than done. You’ve pictured this moment so many times in the past few days, and you can’t believe it’s becoming reality.

And of all the times you’ve fantasized about this, none of them could ever do Farleigh’s beauty justice. His dark eyes are shining with something of lust and hunger, his plush lips slightly parted and his shoulders broad and golden. His curly hair is only slightly wet from his shower earlier, yet still perfectly coiled.

He looks up at you, trying to convey something through his gaze. “So pretty,” He mutters, tracing a finger along your thigh. Your breath catches in your throat and you feel your stomach fluttering already.

He lifts your legs up and places them over his shoulders. Your heart pounds in anticipation and you can hear yourself breathing among the silence.

Farleigh leans down and presses a few kisses along your inner thigh, and you don’t know how much longer you can stand his teasing. You watch him gaze up at you through his lashes as he dips a finger into your wetness and you see the smirk that tugs at his lips. He raises his eyebrows at you and your face turns red. “Stop,” You cover your face with both hands, your stomach doing flips. You can’t handle how perfect he looks right now, even as he teases you for how soaked you are already.

“Hey, look at me,” He says, his deep voice vibrating against your skin. You let your hands fall back to your sides, smiling shyly. His expression turns more serious as he furrows his brows, slipping his finger inside of you. He moans before you even can, his head falling against your thigh.

That familiar stretch around his finger has your mind reeling as you throw your head back. He pulls it out and you whimper at the loss, until you feel his middle and ring finger on your clit. Your hands instinctively move to grasp the sheets as he strokes your bundle of nerves perfectly, letting your head fall back down to watch him. He continues to maintain eye contact and it makes you so weak.

Your brain almost turns to mush as you see him leaning down, his head buried between your legs. A moan louder than you intended leaves your mouth as you feel his tongue greedily licking a stripe up your pussy.

“Shit,” You huff, your chest heaving up and down. No one had ever given you head before, until now, so you didn’t really understand your girlfriends when they would tell you how amazing it felt. But now, you completely get it. His tongue moves in long, slow strokes and his pretty nose nudges perfectly against your clit.

He barely lifts his head so he can stare up at you to watch your reaction. You grind up against his face, your hand reaching down to grab a handful of his curls. He groans at the feeling before inserting a finger again, moving at the perfect pace along with his tongue. The combination is enough to make your legs shake. The lewd sounds of him lapping up your cum and both of your wanton moans echo throughout his room.

“Farleigh!” You almost scream his name before letting out a long, drawn out moan. He glances up at you once more, his pupils huge with lust. He moans against you as he absolutely devours you, adding a second finger in. His long fingers brush against that divine spot inside of you and you whimper helplessly, your other hand gripping his sheets as if it could help ground you somehow. That delicious heat builds in the base of your stomach, spreading like a fire.

“I’m gonna-“ You gasp for air, your chest heaving up and down. His eyes are half-lidded and he seems completely lost in the moment, just absolutely pussy drunk. “Let go,” He says, his voice deep and raspy.

And you do exactly that. The pleasure shoots through your veins like a drug, your grasp in his hair tightening and your hips rolling as you ride it out. You eventually come down from your high, letting your legs drop from his shoulders as you let out a shaky sigh, your heart still pounding against your ribs.

“Fuckk,” You breathe out, resting your head against the pillow. Farleigh crawls over you, leaning down to kiss you. The lower half of his face is covered in your slick, but you couldn’t care less. He kisses you passionately, desperately, groaning into your mouth. You can taste yourself on his lips and his tongue, and it just turns you on even more.

He pulls away, his lips hovering over yours. You look up at him and suddenly feel an indescribable desire wash over you as you stare into his deep brown eyes. It’s like you can’t get close enough to him, like you need more than everything he’s already given you. You want him inside of you. You want to feel every part of him. You want him to feel every part of you.

“Farleigh,” You whisper, reaching up to touch his face. “What is it?” He whispers back, lightly touching your own face.

“I want you,” You say. You don’t care how stupid you sound right now. This carnal desire has completely taken over you.

“In what way?” He replies, smirking smugly. “I think you know which way I mean,” You mutter. You don’t have time for his teasing, although you love it.

His expression softens and he seems to understand what you mean. “Please, I need you,” You can’t believe you’re begging for Farleigh of all people right now. You know you’ll be regretting it later. His eyes widen and he seems shocked by your confession.

“Far…” You whisper, tracing your finger along his lips. He opens his mouth to speak, hesitating slightly.

“Do you know what you do to me?” He asks, his voice soft. You look up at him and tilt your head. He takes your hand and guides it down below his waist while still looking down at you. You gasp softly when you feel that his dick is so hard underneath his sweatpants. It has to be painful. You slowly rub your hand against him and his eyebrows draw together as he stutters slightly, and it almost looks like he’s in pain.

“Baby-“ Farleigh whimpers. “Please,” You beg once again, and he nods, quickly taking his pants off and throwing them somewhere on the floor of his bedroom. You look down at his dick, and you have to keep your jaw from dropping.

It’s definitely the biggest you’ve seen, and although you haven’t seen many in your lifetime, you know he would be considered above average. It’s long, with a bit of girth to it, veiny and already leaking precum from the tip. You feel yourself starting to get nervous. You aren’t sure if you could even take all of it, but hell, you’re going to try. You hope he didn’t pick up on your reaction, because you know he would tease you over it.

He places his hands on either side of your head and leans down onto his elbows. He never takes his eyes off yours as he positions himself. You wrap your legs around his waist, letting your ankles rest on his back.

He slowly begins to slide in, and you grunt quietly at the pain. He goes a bit deeper before you panic and place a hand on his lower stomach, stopping him. “I can’t-“ You wince in pain.

“Yes, you can. You can take it,” He nods and brushes the side of your face with his fingers. He takes your hand off of his stomach gently and places your arm back onto the bed. You nod in an attempt to encourage yourself, gritting your teeth to withstand the pain. You reach up to his shoulders, resting your hands on his shoulder blades, trying to keep your nails from digging into his skin as you hold onto him.

“Fuck,” Farleigh grunts as your walls grip him tightly, sucking him in. Eventually he’s buried inside of you to the hilt, and you can feel every inch of him. You’re still trying to adjust to his size, and the pain is slowly subsiding as he groans and drops his head and closes his eyes. You press your hips up against his, trying to get him to start moving. “Far,” You mutter. You can tell he’s trying to hold back. He breathes heavily and opens his eyes again, gazing into yours.

“I’m ready,” You whisper. His eyebrows knit together as he rolls his hips slowly, causing your eyes to roll back and drawing a short moan out of you. He shudders, slightly pulling out of you before thrusting back in. You wonder how he’s so good at this as your nails dig crescent moons into his back with each slow thrust and roll of his hips. Your mouth falls open and you try to be quieter but it’s no use.

He buries his head into the crook of your neck, his curls tickling your face. He’s whimpering and moaning your name and other incoherent nonsense right into your ear. He sets a beautiful rhythm, his bed creaking underneath you as you sink into the plush of the mattress. You think you hear the headboard hitting the wall but you don’t care about the loud sounds you two are creating. You just don’t want this moment to end.

He looks back up to you and you can see he’s already fucked out. His eyes are even more glazed over than before and sex sweat forms on his brow. He whimpers helplessly and pants heavily. “You’re so good,” He breathes. “So, so good,” You could probably cum just from his words alone.

You let out a wanton moan as he hits that spot again, deep inside of you. “Oh, fuck!” You gasp and claw at his shoulders. He drops his head again, kissing your neck as he thrusts into you faster and deeper each time, hitting your spot over and over once he’s found it.

“Yeah, that’s it,” He groans against your neck and you feel tears brimming in your eyes. “Farleigh- It’s-“ You can’t seem to form words, your brain turned to sizzling hot liquid. “I know, I know,” He whimpers, his voice slightly higher pitched and breathless. You try to hold on longer, but you’re already coming undone as your orgasm hits you sooner than you expected. Your body stills and you clench even harder around him. He moans, that pained expression crossing his face once again. “Oh God,” He chokes out, his thrusts beginning to become less steady.

“Where should I-“ Farleigh pants. “Inside,” You tell him. You’re on birth control, but you don’t have the mental capacity to explain that to him or explain why. His hips stutter and he stiffens, finishing inside of you, the warm feeling spreading throughout your lower stomach. He collapses on top of you, his head on your chest, resting on the soft fabric of your shirt.

You’re already sleepy and physically exhausted from what just took place. You breathe in his scent one more time and let out a sigh, staring up at the ceiling and trying to process what you just did. Then he’s wrapping his arms around you gently before pulling out of you slowly. You grunt a bit, feeling a dull ache between your legs, but you can’t help but miss the feeling of him inside of you.

He adjusts the both of you so that you’re both laying on your side, allowing you to stretch out a bit and cuddle up to him, tucking your head in the crook of his neck. He holds you, and for a moment, it feels like a real relationship. Something you had never experienced. Something deep. Something real. And then you remember that it’s not. After this, he will go back to avoiding you and acting like he can’t stand you. You just wish that he would put his pride away and admit to you what he really feels. But what does he really feel? Are you stupid for thinking that there’s something here?

Farleigh strokes his fingers through your hair, brushing away some of the strands plastered onto your forehead by your sweat. He seems to notice your silence.

“You’re thinking too much,” He says, his voice beautifully hoarse. You sigh, relaxing your shoulders. “Am I?” You reply, your voice weaker than you thought it would be.

“Just sleep here tonight,” He mutters, resting his chin on top of your head. You so badly want to ask him to be serious and have an actual conversation with you about your… relationship.

“Okay… but we need to talk about this,” You respond quietly. He sighs and shifts a bit, careful not to move you too much. “We can in the morning,” He says, but you know that won’t happen. You’ll just have to settle for no answers to your questions for the time being.

You curl up closer to him and let your eyes close, breathing slowly and peacefully. “Goodnight,” You murmur. “Night,” He replies, sounding just as tired as you are. You drift off to sleep in Farleigh Start’s arms.

ONE YEAR EARLIER

You were usually on okay terms with Farleigh. But you remember exactly when the dislike turned into hatred.

It was right before end of term exams and Felix convinced you to go to the pub to blow off some steam and relax after all your revising. You reluctantly agreed, then regret your decision when you saw Farleigh and Sasha there.

It was pretty far into the evening and you were beginning to get sleepy. You had spaced out for a moment, staring out the window and watching the snow fall before you heard something that peaked your interest.

“I mean, Felix, you have got to settle down,” Farleigh chuckled and nudged Sasha, pointing his cigarette at Felix.

Felix grinned stupidly and shrugged. “Listen, mate. I’ve tried.” Some other friends of his joined in with the laughter.

You sat up and leaned forward, facing Farleigh. “You’re one to comment on relationships,” You said, raising an eyebrow. Everyone else sort of quieted down after hearing your words.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Farleigh rolled his eyes at you and Sasha just glared. “You and Sasha. You’re dysfunctional.” You responded, unafraid to challenge him.

“Excuse me?” Sasha looked at you like you just committed a hate crime. “Yeah. He cheats on you, you cheat on him, you get back together, blah blah blah.” You took a sip of your beer and shrugged. “It’s gone on for almost a year now. It’s exhausting,”

Farleigh chuckled. “Ohh, you want to come after my relationship?” He smirked as if he was cooking up a plan in his mind of how to humiliate you best.

“Well, I bet you would like everyone to know that you lost your virginity to Joshua Brown,” Farleigh said, loud enough for even people from other tables to hear. A small chorus of gasps echoed across the room.

“You’re desperate, easy, and sloppy. You take anyone who wants you. I guess that’s what happens when you get no attention before you go to college, hm?” He just kept going, and the whole room went silent

“I’ve seen you walk out of so many dorms at six in the morning, it’s insane. You can’t even keep a fucking man,” Farleigh’s tone was harsher and colder than you’d ever heard before. Felix was staring at you in shock and Sasha was giving you that judgemental look.

You looked around to see all the pairs of eyes on you. “Fucking hell, Farleigh,” Felix muttered, shaking his head at him.

You stood up and grabbed your bag hastily, storming out of the pub with tears in your eyes. Why was he such a bitch? Why did he hate you?

Your reputation was officially ruined. All that time, he never told anyone about your situation with Joshua. Until now. He was doing so well. The whole class thought you were an innocent and pure, high achieving student, and now what would they think? You wish you didn’t care so much about how others perceive you, but you do.

You hated Farleigh. You hated him for ruining your reputation and your image. It was impossible to get him back or do something worse, since basically everyone knew he was a slut. But he got praised for it.

Ever since that night at the pub, other students would look at you sideways and whisper things about you as if you couldn’t hear them.

Fuck you, Farleigh. You decided you were officially done with him and your weird friendship. Even if that meant having to avoid him at every cost.

taglist: @isla-finke-blog @ibimbogrl @drunkmysticsquirrel @alonia-olivia @novemilady @saltburnsworld @florkt @i-love-ptv

[abibliophobiaa]

Comfort (smut is ok too)

I havent laughed like this in a long time

Forced proximity

Eddie munson

🌛🌜

thank you for your sweet request. had a lot of fun with this one. little ex-lovers to lovers again with rockstar!eddie ahead. warnings: mentions of alcohol and 18+, minors dni for p in v sex. || 2k words

You don’t mean to bump into your ex boyfriend at the bar. You’re meant to meet up with a date—someone your roommate, Robin, had set you up with. Said it was a friend from her undergrad program, that he was great and was a high school history teacher. Only he’s not here now, hasn’t shown up and it’s been well over an hour. Which is a shame, truly, because he sounded safe; vastly different from the man actually sitting before you now, twirling the ice round and around within his glass. 

And it’s not that Eddie isn’t safe, it’s just that he’d gone off on tour nearly a year ago and it rocked the foundations of your relationship to the core. He asked you to come. Through teary goodbyes as he climbed onto the tour bus all those months ago, he asked you once more. Begged for you to come, to embark on this new journey, to be there. But you were studying, working on your graduate degree, and he understood. He’s always understood, and though it pained him he climbed on that bus all the same and told you you’d make it work. 

For a bit…it did. 

You enjoyed the random flowers he’d have sent to your apartment, the gifts that would arrive at your doorstep on your birthday and other holidays, the phone sex when the guys had long gone to bed for the night. 

But eventually, all things change. 

 Phone conversations became sparse, conversation heavy and limited, spoken through whatever crappy phone booth he could come across on the road. You reminded yourself on those hard days that he always promised nothing would change, that time and space couldn’t take away what the two of you shared, but it changed you. 

You suggested it one day. Taking time apart. You with tests coming up, him with the constant late nights. You weren’t connecting like you once did, you told him, and winced when you heard his shaky exhale on the other line. It breaks you to break him, because if there’s one thing Eddie Munson has always been, it’s giving. You could ask for the moon and he’d wrangle that and the stars for you. He’d do anything to make you smile, to see you happy, to let you know just how honestly and truly loved you were. 

So he granted you that. Told you he loved you enough to let you go and hung up the phone on the receiver. It had been four months since that day. Four months of wondering what he’s doing, what he’s been up to. Four months of capturing his face in a magazine at a newsstand on your way home from work in the bustling streets of New York City. You bought them every time. Flipped through the colorful pages and traced the features you knew like the back of your hand, if only just to see him in some limited capacity. 

It’s nothing like having him across from you now. There’s never been anything really to encompass the punch to your gut that’s an inevitability when those amber eyes dart your way. 

“Can I sit here?” he asks, and he’s already sitting when you finally nod. “You alone?”

“I was supposed to be meeting up with someone.” He flinches at your honesty and nods. His dark hair dances along his black leather jacket, thumb running along his bottom lip as you continue eagerly, “What are you doing here?”

“Playing a concert tomorrow, as you know. We had the day off today.” He pauses at your frown. “You got the tickets I sent you, didn’t you?”

“I did,” you admit, remembering that they’re on the fridge back at your apartment. You’d been shocked when he sent them. Had meant to reach out…just hadn’t yet. “I’m going, if that’s what you’re wondering. With Robin.”

“Good.” He chuckles, mouth drawn into a smile that shows his dimples. “Your date is an ass, you know—for, uh, standing you up.”

You offer him a pleasant smile, twirling your own drink in front of you as you say, “I’m enjoying my company just fine.”

It’s as easy as breathing, the two of you falling back into conversation. You suppose that’s the nature of a friendship forged when you’re kids, and a romantic relationship that only came later. But you fall back into step like old friends and lovers, catching up on the months lost, of the guys in the band, your happenings in school, how Robin is doing. You talk about Hawkins and how Steve visited with the kids last weekend. And before long you’re walking back to your apartment, bubbles of excitement dancing in your belly at the prospect of spending more time with Eddie. 

“You sure you want me to come back?” he asks, all boyish grins and fingers toying with a curl that he drags along his plush lips. 

“It’s going to snow anyway. And my apartment is closer than your hotel,” you tell him, just as you drag him inside. “Robin’s out for the night anyway.”

You don’t intend to stay up most of the night talking. But you do, huddled together on your couch, giggling together until your sides ache and your cheeks hurt from grinning so much. Somewhere, in the midst of the movie you pop in and set to watch, a bowl of popcorn positioned in Eddie’s lap, the two of you drift off into sleep. Leather jacket pressed against your cheek, the tattoo of his heartbeat loud in your ears, the comfort of his familiarity calling you home. 

In the morning, you’re both on your sides. The popcorn, now likely stale, sits on your coffee table. Eddie’s fingers press into the dip of your back, his thighs slotted between yours, his face just millimeters from your forehead. It feels normal, and there’s a feeling of right that stirs in your chest from just simply having him close to you like this.

“Hey,” he murmurs, eyes closed, head nuzzling into yours. 

You don’t push away, don’t try to move. It feels nice, this nearness to him. Your fingers slide up and along his back, brushing against skin beneath his shirt. “Hi.” 

You’re met with those eyes that could have you falling in love all over again. Then again, you don’t think you ever truly fell out. “I haven’t laughed like that in a long time,” he whispers, thumb coming up to run along your cheek gently. 

At the slow drag of the digit back and forth along your jawline, your heart stutters. “Me neither, Eddie. Look—I’m really sorry for—”

His next words tumble out in a breathless rush, “Do you think you could give us another chance? I’m done with the tour in another month and then I’ll be home. Here. And I want to do it with you.”

It’s a beautiful dream; sounds like everything you could want and more. But the logistics, the reality of what that looks like. “Eddie…you’re in Hawkins when you’re not working, and I’m here in the city—”

“I’ll move in.”

You break out into a disbelieving laugh. “Did you just invite yourself to move into my apartment?”

“I’ll move in…if you let me. If you want me to,” he says slowly, looking you firmly in the eye. There’s a severity there you’re unused to on his features. “Look, it’s not going to be easy, and I know that. I should have been more supportive on the road last time, should have called you more. Fuck, there’s a lot of things I should have done, but I shouldn’t have let you go. I should have gotten on the next plane to New York and been here.”

You’ve both made mistakes. Endless ones. Too many to count. In your heart, you understand letting Eddie go—letting your love go—is one of the gravest. 

“Your career skyrocketed—”

“Doesn’t matter. You were there for all my shitty shows with the five drunks in our crowd, and you were there when we played our first festival. You were there when we got signed with the record label. And I’m a fuckin’ idiot.”

It’s crazy; it sounds crazy, but it feels right and you’re blurting out your next words without thinking about it, choosing to try, choosing to believe, “I have three conditions for you moving in here.”

The hand brushing your cheek stops. “I’m listening.”

“You kiss me every morning and night when you’re here.” 

“Easy.” He leans down and nudges his nose against yours for emphasis. At the soft nod of your head, he leans down and captures your mouth with his, swallowing the hum that swells in the back of your throat. 

You reluctantly pull away, teasing the line of his nose with your own. “You promise to separate your lights from your darks before throwing them in the wash.”

He smirks, huffing out a laugh. “Babe, I’ll even do the dishes.”

“Tempting,” you tease, sliding your hand around his back and dragging it across his abdomen. His stomach twitches under your touch, amber eyes liquefying as they glance down to where your skin brushes his. 

“What’s the last one?” he asks, a pointer finger coming to tip your head up to look at him. He places another peck on your lips, maneuvering the two of you on the couch so you can shift over onto your back, one of his elbows resting beside your head to prop himself up. 

Your fingers slide up and over his heart, resting over the place you’d broken some months ago now, the same place he was willing to open up to you and lay bare once more. “We will never ever break up again. It killed me the first time. Been my best friend since we were kids, Ed.”

“I know, sweetheart, I know.” His palm moves to lay over yours, forehead dropping to rest against yours. “Never again. Gonna make sure you know every day just how much you mean to me. I love you.”

“I love you, too.” And you mean it. It’s never been something that stopped; it’s a certainty just as the sun rising each day is. “So how soon can you move in?”

“Well,” he hums, sliding a palm down your side, along the curve of your hip, around the bend of your knee that spreads to accommodate him between the cradle of your hips. “Seeing as we’re snowed in, we can practice now.”

Your kisses are slow and languid, as is the way you undress one another. Fingers coming to slide his jacket down his arms, to help drag the tee shirt beneath up and over his head until his wavy hair springs free. He slides your jeans down your thighs, making you giggle when he blows a raspberry into your abdomen after you kick your thong free from your ankle into a heap on the floor alongside the jeans and boxers he’s since removed. And it’s a honey sweet sigh as he flops over onto his back and you sink down onto him, relishing in the fullness of being with the man who holds your heart after four months without. It’s the soft build of your impending release, husky moans from the man beneath you, quiet moans spilling from your parted lips. It’s the ringed fingers helping you rock against him, his hips undulating beneath yours, driving you closer and closer to your tipping point, the rasp of his voice as he breathes out, “I—ah, fuck. Made for me, sweetheart.”

“Missed you, Ed. Missed this. Missed us.” 

“That’s it. Take what you need. S’ gorgeous, baby.” 

As you shatter around him, sated and spent, and drop down to rest against him, with his fingers trailing up and down your bare spine, you relish in the fresh start, a love to nurture. 

And a few days later, you relish in the new home you start to build as you help him unpack and his things become one with your own. 

-

-

[basiltonpitch]

I neeedddddd to know your predictions based off the trailer (of Benvi in particular, I really do care about other things in the show but I love them the most)

ooooh okay so.....not all of these predictions are actually serious some of them i just think would be FUN but i dont think they'll actually implement lmao. also....as usual i dont know when to shut the fuck up and stop typing SO. predictions under the cut!!

my prediction for benvi is: devi ghosts ben post-boinkening (basically confirmed; the trailer insinuates that they havent spoken since); ben goes after margot because she likes him (and we all saw how well it went the last time ben started dating someone else bc devi wasn't an option), it implodes, devi retaliates by dating ethan because he's hot or whatever the fuck (and honestly good for her im sure he's a tool but like.....rebound arm candy isnt necessarily a bad thing.....except in this case it is bc that is Also going to implode.) i think it would be HILARIOUS if margot and ethan ended up going out lmfao but. i doubt it. after both their rebounds fail (ben's i want to say around episode 2 bc i dont think they'll drag it out super long, and devi's probably episode 5?) they're still.....skirting around each other, in a will they/won't they kind of situation. i can see fab & eleanor trying to talk some sense into devi but devi just not listening bc she's stubborn as hell and of course she knows there's something there with ben but they've done this back-and-forth dance for so long that she's still nervous about taking that full leap.

and well. then she ends up getting like...accosted in new york (which im guessing the trailer may have been a bit misleading about that exact scenario because, ya know, it's a trailer) and ben tries to play knight in shining armor and well. we all saw what happened lmfao. cue devi icing ben's face n devi being like "why did you do that?" and ben just says "for you" or smthn cheesy as hell. this is probs around like? episode 7 i'd like to think? and they probably at least partially get their shit together but like. lbr it's ben and devi. so it can't be 100% smooth sailing. like you said im excpecing a tatbilb sort of thing - they agree to date & then break up before going to college. (we all know devi gets denied for early decision from princeton - this could play into her actually going to a school in new york - something prestigious, ofc, she graduates as valedictorian).

based on the trailer....im honestly torn on whether ben goes to prom or not! i know you said smthn about him perhaps going home and changing, but part of me also thinks - what if he didnt go at all? what if he stays home, because he knows this is gonna be one of his last good memories with devi and he just cant do it? i know we havent seen a lot of bts for season 4, but we have seen bts of maitreyi + lee + ramona in their prom dresses, and i dont recall jaren being there at all or wearing a suit (the only suit bts ive seen is of him in 2x10). so......maybe he doesnt go, but he comes to her after. idk exactly how that will play out but thats what im hoping for!!!

and of course, they end up going to the same school - thats been something ive been sure of since, well, forever lmao. i'm 100000% convinced that the last shot of the show is going to be devi coming up to ben in the library of their college or vice versa and if im wrong i will eat my mf words

as for other predictions....

i'm with you on thinking it might not be kamala's wedding anymore, but i'm still not sure who's wedding it would be - perhaps another family member? a family friend? who knows.

i think treleanor is going to break up, which is TRAGIC because they r everything to me <3 but i feel like they're the kind of couple to come back to each other after years apart so im holding out hope for them 🤞 in treleanor we trust u know !!!!

paxton's.....there. idk. he's there. devi probably like. goes after him or whatever in the midst of the ben/margot/ethan bullshit bc she doesnt want to be alone and shes like oh i finally like myself maybe i can have this since i can't have what i really want but ya know power dynamics due to him being sherman oaks staff or whatever so. im HOPING as the party with the upper hand in that scenario he turns her down or whatever. maybe she even waits until after this to go after ethan - make both ben and paxton jealous, kill two birds with one stone

i have no idea what else im hoping for and this is straight up a Wall of text aksjdss;d im SO SORRY u know how i get !!!!!

[stuckinapril]

once i had a convo with my school friend about her insecurities and i was trying to make her less anxious but when the bell rang i couldnt hear what she was talking about & i accidentally nodded to confirm her fears when she was apparently talking about everything going wrong. she reacted badly and we had different classes after and i havent spoken to her since we graduated. shes doing well though last i heard (3 years ago) shes very smart and passionate so there was literally no way she wasnt going to get in but. yeah :/

Omg literally something I would do during a very awkward social interaction. I am sure she is doing well tho & it’s not your fault the bell chose to rang right then ! Like genuinely the brain does not catch up w reality sometimes. But yes this is painfully relatable <3

[bridgyrose]

Wholesome Red Velvet meeting Tai and Summer. Cuteness ensues.

Ruby started to pace in the front room of her apartment, eyes still glued to the scroll she held as her fingers started to shake. Normally, she’d welcome any sort of text from her parents, especially since she was still on better terms with them. But today was different. Today, her parents were wanting to meet her girlfriend and she was not ready for any of that. Her heart thumped in her chest with each step she took. 

“Ruby, are you okay?” Velvet asked as she watched her girlfriend. “You’re pacing again.” 

“Mom and dad want to meet you.” 

“And that’s a bad thing?” 

“Yes. Well… no… I…” Ruby finally stopped pacing a rut into the living room floor and sat down, scroll dropping to the ground. “I’m a little… nervous. Dad… dad didnt take Yang being with Blake and Weiss very well and mom… she’s a little protective of me. They both did what they could to keep me from being a huntress because they didnt want me following in their footsteps, and the last time I told them anything about someone I liked, they made things… miserable.” 

Velvet nodded and slowly made her way over to Ruby. “You do know that no matter how they feel about me, that’s not going to change how I feel about you, right?” 

“I know. I still worry.” 

“You dont need to. I’ll be by your side no matter what.” 

Ruby started to relax as she felt Velvet kiss her cheek, her heart starting to slow for a moment. After her team fell apart, it did feel nice to have someone she could rely on. “I… thank you.” 

Velvet smiled. “Then let’s invite them to dinner. If they want to meet me, then a home cooked meal will be perfect for that.” 

Ruby nodded and picked up her scroll off the floor. “I’ll let them know.” 

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I’ll get it!” Ruby yelled out from the kitchen as she rushed to the door in a flurry of petals. Her body practically vibrated in nervousness as she opened up the front door to the apartment. “Hey mom, dad. Come in.” 

Summer gave her daughter a small smile and walked in. “Its a bit cozy, dont you think? Though, a bit small to start a family with.” 

Ruby blushed a bit at the thought of kids with Velvet. “We uh… we only just graduated a couple years ago, so its not like we’re in a rush to start up anything. Besides, this place works for us.” 

“We can tease them about this later,” Taiyang said as he put a hand on Summer’s shoulder. “For now, I think its time we meet our daughter’s girlfriend.” 

“Dinner will be finished in just a bit.” Velvet brought over a couple plates to start setting the table. “Make yourself comfortable and I’ll be over in a bit.” 

Summer nodded, watching Velvet as she sat down. Once the faunus was out of sight, she looked over to Ruby, her smile starting to fade. “Are you happy?” 

Ruby slowly sat down. “Of course I am, why wouldnt I be?” 

“Because I worry about you. You started dating her out of nowhere, you havent spoken to your teammates for months after Yang broke up with them… what will happen if things go south with her?” 

“We’ll be fine.” Ruby smiled to hide her own nervousness, looking to the kitchen to watch her girlfriend. “She’s nice and cares about me. We help each other, we talk if we dont agree, we compromise… Velv and I will be fine.” 

“Talking about me again?” Velvet sat down a carrot stew on the table along with some chicken and rolls. “I hope its good things.” 

“Always Bunbun!” Ruby turned to look at her mother again. “We can rely on each other.” 

Taiyang put a hand on Summer’s thigh. “Ruby’s always been fine. You know there’s nothing to worry about.” 

Summer nodded and watched Velvet walk over to Ruby and kiss her while gently rubbing her ear. A nervous smile started to cross her lips as everyone started to make their way to the table for dinner. “Its what she might get dragged into I’m worried about.” 

[rexaleph]

in more terrible workplace social news, the guy who accused me of writing his student's thesis for her still thinks i did it. 2 years since we both graduated, one year since she left, like 6 months since he finally brought it up to me personally instead of discussing how "someone who knows our work must have helped" within earshot, and i painted him a picture of how during that period i barely managed to scrape together my own thesis while sick w covid, nvm anyone else's, and as of yesterday he's still going around telling people how i "didnt admit it :("

also i think he considers our relationship as like a power struggle where i dont respect him bc he has me proofread his writing sometimes. and hes right, i kinda dont, but only in as much as hes socially inept and unprofessional to the detriment of the people he's in charge of. Wrt work shit im always asking him respectfully for advice etc

Anyway thanks for thinking i had it in me to write 2 master's theses at the same time, please dont retaliate against me for i guess lying to you and covering for some random person i havent spoken to in a year

[mysticvenus]

don’t you hate it when you know you have friends but you don’t feel like you do because you know they’re temporary and will leave you eventually and it could be because of you or you might just drift apart or move away or new opportunities will arise for them and you will be just stuck in the same place you’ve always been just waiting for someone but no one will ever come because you’re not memorable or special in any way. you’re just kinda there.

[conartisthaiji]

had a dream about gay pirate girl last night which,,,okay 

[meme-loving-stuck]

I got a text this morning from a woman I havent spoken to in years, and it made me really think about how complex some relationships are even if theyre dormant ones.

The reason we dont speak much isnt because I dont like her, or we're estranged, in fact we never really knew eachother in the first place. My only connections to her are that she teaches at my old high school, and she was the host mother of a long-time ex-boyfriend of mine, who I only ever met because he stayed as an exchange student here for a year. So really, the only connection now is that she teaches at a school I no longer attend. We never really kept in touch much, and I stopped visiting the high school once all my friends graduated, I havent seen her since I was 19.

And yet, I just saw her name in my contacts yesterday and really thought about her for the first time in two years. And then today she texts me. How kind she is to still reach out, and I wonder what it was that she saw or heard or thought of that made her think of me in the first place. Maybe she saw my name when she was going through her contacts, too.

[mercenarypark]

happy father’s day i celebrated it by not calling my dad, looking through my stepmother’s arrest records, and buying a “father’s day” cookie cake for myself