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hwasoup · 4 months

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Tale As Old As Time

Playlist to read along with !!

songs used for inspo: The First Branch, Belle, Nice and Airy How Does a Moment Last Forever (music box), No Matter What,

art credit goes to Marbipa

this au is very heavily inspired from the 1991 movie, 2017 movie, and the musical, some things will seem similar and at times different, some parts of dialogue will be familiar, however it's for the sake of the plot. to summarize, this is basically a retelling of the story. I hope you guys enjoy!!

also let me know if you want to be on the taglist!!

<< prev. | ch.2 >>

Warnings: brief mention of character death, slight misogyny

word count: 1.9K

summary: life as the inventor's daughter

Chapter 1 : The Village

In a small province, east of the castle, there was a small village called Arachna,

This village is quite unique on its own as there are many people of different personalities, Men go to work and get an education and the women stay at home to learn how to be housewives and tend for children. Reading was considered wrong for women to read…Men didn’t want them to develop ideas or think for themselves and only solely focus on the children… However…At the edge of the village, at a small house lived an old inventor, he knew how to fix clocks, create music boxes, and most importantly invent. He would slave the day away just tinkering and figuring out new ideas on how to make life more comfortable and convenient, he proposed his ideas constantly to the villagers to help them make their lives a bit easier, but alas…the villagers called him a loon and demented for frivolous ideas. He would go home dejected, but his greatest pride and most precious invention would be at home; Y/N…

He had raised y/n all on his own after his wife passed away when y/n was 5. To his precious daughter, He promised himself that he wouldn’t shun her from her curiosity and instead showed her all there is to know. Y/N learned how to read, write, speak, analyze, and even sing a little, all due to her father’s promise that he made to her dying mother and to his daughter. Eventually, Y/N grew to be a lovely and beautiful woman. She’s kind, compassionate, loving, and even imaginative. She even has a huge affinity for reading and especially having a bit of a collection of books at home.

You may wonder, what is Y/N’s life like at her village

well it goes a bit like this…

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

A rooster crows in the distance, as the sun rises, signifying the day to begin..

Y/N has woken up and looked at her book beside her bedside table and smiles “well now...time to return this to the bookstore” she says softly to herself. She opens her curtains and opens the window, smelling the morning dew from the fresh air. Y/N gets dressed in her favorite blue dress, tying her hair in a low ponytail with a ribbon and walks downstairs to cook some breakfast for herself before leaving. She puts her book in a little basket and walks out and heads for the village. “Any moment now…before I hear-” she gets interrupted by the waking village “BUENOS DIAS MI GENTE”

Y/N rolls her eyes as she sees the empty streets quickly fill up with people with errands and work to do. She smells fresh wheat from the bakery, and she smiles as she thinks how the baker always sells his bread right on time. “Ah, Buenos Dias Y/N” the baker says. “Oh Buenos Dias, señor”, The Baker looks at her and smiles and asks, “where are you off to?” Y/N smiling and excited to tell him says “Oh I’m going to the bookstore! I just finished reading this amazing story about an ogre, a donkey, and a cursed princess-” she gets interrupted “oh that’s nice. OYE MARIA, LOS BOLILLOS” he ends up yelling to his wife in the bakery. Y/N shrugs and moves along her day.

The villagers see her and start whispering amongst themselves, they gossiped about how she would always read, always having her nose stuck in a book.However, they could all mutually agree that despite her odd personality, she’s truly a sight for sore eyes, a truly beautiful woman who sadly knows how to think.

Y/N arrives at the bookstore and opens the door, the bell on top of the door chiming, announcing her arrival. “Buenos Días señor ! vine a devolver el libro que me prestaron” she says handing the book back to the salesclerk with much care. The salesclerk laughs “ Already? Y/N my dear, it's only been since yesterday.” Y/N who was already on the ladder searching for another book looked down at him sheepishly “yea, well I couldn’t exactly put it down…” Her hand lands on a familiar blue book, she pulls it out of the bookshelf and hands it to the salesclerk “I’ll borrow this one !” The salesclerk looks at the title of the book and shakes his head, amused by her antics “you’ve read this book almost 2 times already, are you sure you want this book again ?” he says, while helping Y/N down the ladder. “Well I can’t help it, faraway places, tense sword fights, magic spells, and a prince in disguise”

The salesclerk chuckles and hands her the book “well if you like it so much it’s yours...” Y/N holds the book in her hands in excitement “I-I… are you sure?” she asks hesitantly. “I insist, please take it” he tells her. “Well then thank you, thank you so much!” Y/N leaves the bookstore happily, immediately opening to the first page.

While Y/N is in the distance walking with her new book, next to a tavern there is a strong, tall, blone, handsome brute of a man, checking himself out in the mirror, making sure that his looks are impeccable. “BEN! I caught your uhh…whatever this bird is, oh and some girls told me to tell you you’re an amazing hunter” says a shorter looking pudgy man to him.

“Why thank you Eddie for reminding me how perfect I am,” Ben says. Eddie nods as he pretends to agree with his own statement. “I bet that not even a beast or girl can handle you,” he says, feeding the man’s ego. Ben looks down at Eddie and grins “oh and that’s true as well, but my next hunt is that one over there” he says pointing at Y/N. Eddie looks at him a bit appalled and says, “the inventor’s daughter?” Ben then inhales and goes on a tangent “Why yes, Eddie…she’s the one I’m going to marry, the most beautiful girl in town. As soon as I met her, I knew that I have to make her my wife, a handsome man like me and a gorgeous woman like her are meant to be together” Eddie agrees with him reluctantly as he sees Venom speed walk to catch up with her.

Ben goes through a bustling market in order to reach Y/N who is easing her way through the crowd despite reading a book. “Please let me through” he said exasperated, not wanting to let Y/N out of his sight. Eventually he does finally reach her by climbing the roof of a house and landing right on his feet like the man he is. “Hello, Y/N” he says as his eyes scan her from head to toe. “Hola, Ben” she says in response while still focusing on her book. ben then smirks and quickly takes the book away from her hands to get her attention.

“Ben, por favor give back my book” she says politely. Ben ignores her by butting in her way and flipping the pages in the book “How do you read this… there’s no pictures…”

“Well if you read books then you would know that some people have something called an imagination”

Ben looks at her and throws the book somewhere as he tries to charm her “well Y/N, I believe it's finally time for you to stop reading books and pay attention to more…attractive things, like me” he says. “The whole town talks about it. It’s not proper for women to read...besides women thinking means they develop ideas and start assuming things” he says with a bit of a grimace on his face.

“Ay, Ben you’re so antediluvian.”

Y/N then reaches down to pick up her book and wipes the dirt off with a handkerchief. She turns around to keep on going back home but is stopped by Ben yet again as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, mentioning how she should join him at the tavern so that they could talk and bond. “Oh, but I can't. I have to go help my father, goodbye now” she says, as she walks away as fast as her feet can take her away from the brainless man.

A few minutes later after speed walking, Y/N sees smoke coming out of the basement and rushes there quickly. “PAPA!” She opens the basement door to let out the smoke and searches for her father “ay papa, que paso? estas bien?” she asks as she helps him get up from the floor “Ay Hijita, I'm fine... I just can’t get this piece of metal to start working” Y/N chuckles and kisses her father’s forehead “papa you always say that when you’re frustrated… Besides, if you get this to work… you can finally go to the contest and win that prize you’ve always wanted.”

Her father thinks for a while and nods “ you’re right…i shouldn’t give up, i’ll get a patent on this and i’ll finally be Mauricio, the greatest inventor ever seen!” Y/N smiles and hugs her father before leaving to let him finish his invention. “Oh right, papa did you…” she looks at him with a knowing look “yes I did mijita, it's upstairs at the kitchen table.” Y/N nods and dashes up inside the house and speeds to the kitchen. She stops when she looks at the table and smiles fondly. It was her mother’s old music box…now fixed after so many years…

Y/N sits by the table and winds up the music box and hums along to the melody being played remembering the lullaby her father used to sing to her before going to sleep as a child. She then looks up and sees her father smiling at her, enjoying the melody as well. “Papa…do you think i'm..odd ?” she says softly to him. Her father raises an eyebrow and sits beside her “y a donde sacaste eso??”

“People talk papa…” she says looking to the side. “Solecito…they talk about me too, we’re not odd at all…” He brings his hand to her shoulder to console her “you’re my daughter…and you’re mother’s daughter as well, They’re the common people and you…you’re unique Hija. No matter what you do I’m always on your side ok?” Y/N smiles and chuckles “are you sure that’s just not you being biased?” Her father laughs and shrugs “Maybe…maybe not…don’t ever change who you are, ok?” Y/N smiles and nods “ok papa” A few days later, Y/N’s father was finished with his invention and had prepared the wagon, placing some food, medicine, horse fodder, and his invention all neatly placed inside the wagon. As he adds the saddle onto Felipe’s back, placing the reins properly on the horse’s side. He then looks at Y/N and smiles “Hijita…what do you wish for me to bring back for you? Shall it be jewelry, or dresses, or new perfumes?” Y/N thinks for a minute and says, “A rose, like the one mama had embroidered on her dress” He chuckles “But, you ask for that every year. Y/N smiles as she looks at her father “and yet every year you’ll bring it...” “Fine then, you’ll have my word, adios por ahora y/n” he says as he gently caresses his daughter’s cheek. “Adios Papa...” Y/N would watch her father ride up the hill into the distance.

“Stay Safe...”

taglist: @cupcakeinat0r , @miguelhugger2099, @mcmiracles, @xxsugarbonesxx,@codenameredkrystalmatrix,@deputy-videogamer,@lxverrings,@miguelzslvtz,@itsameclinicaldepression

#atsv miguel #miguel o'hara x reader #spiderman 2099 #miguel o'hara #miguel x reader #miguel atsv #miguel ohara x reader #miguel ohara #miguel spiderman #miguel spiderverse #miguel 2099

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ashwhowrites · 5 months

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okay so this has been in my head forever but imagine cheerleader/rich popular reader and eddie are dating. reader is the daughter of a company ceo and wayne works at the company. wayne absolutely hates his boss because he’s rich and spoiled and his boss hates him because he doesn’t understand where he came from since he never grew up poor or whatever. let’s say one day reader and eddie decide to tell their parents about each other and reader invites eddie and wayne to come to her house for dinner and wayne and her dad are pissed bc they don’t want their kid/nephew associated with each other and like forbid them from being together but they eventually realize how much they mean to each other and like give them permission to date again. i feel like this would be so chaotic and funny but cute and wholesome at the same time

I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻

Rich girl, poor boy

Wayne Munson was a hard-working man who didn't get credit where it was due. He started at the bottom and worked his way through every promotion. But his boss made Wayne's life hell. He kept Wayne at work later and later, giving him random tasks that weren't needed and treating him like scum. His boss was a rich old man, he was bitter and looked down on the people beneath him. Wayne was used to being the poorest man compared to others, but to be targeted because of it by his boss was his last straw. He hated that man and he hated whoever was related to him.

Wayne worked hard for himself but he also worked hard for Eddie. To provide as much as he could for his nephew. That's why he sucked it up and kept working for that twat of a boss.

~~~

"You're home very late," Eddie announced as Wayne walked through the door. The small clock above the couch read midnight as Eddie picked at the cold plate of dinner.

"Tried to wait but I was starved," Eddie said, Wayne brushed it off, heating his plate in the microwave. He waited a few seconds as it heated, grabbing a beer and taking a swig. He grabbed the warm plate and set it on the table.

"It's fine. The boss decided every car on the lot needed a tire cleaning." Wayne grumbled, stuffing his face with semi-warm food, Eddie frowned as he sat across from his uncle.

"Again? You did that last week." Eddie said he could see Wayne's body language was annoyed and exhausted.

"Didn't do good enough last time," Wayne said, rolling his eyes as he ate his first meal of the deal. Eddie watched with a heavy heart as Wayne's tired body ate as fast as he could. He knew once he finished, Wayne would go to bed and do it all over again.

"How was your day, though?" Wayne asked, he tried to keep up with Eddie's life. His parents were deadbeats and never checked up on him. Wayne wanted Eddie to have at least one parent who cared.

"Good! I took Y/N to get ice cream and we listened to new records." Eddie smiled as he recalled his day. Wayne couldn't help but smile along. Eddie had this girlfriend that he was obsessed with. She was popular and a cheerleader. Wayne almost choked on his dinner when Eddie first told him about her. He was nervous that such a popular girl was interested in Eddie, but from every story, she sounded sweet and genuine.

"When do I get to meet the unlucky girl?" Wayne joked, placing his fork on the empty plate.

"Haha," Eddie faked laughed, flipping Wayne off. "She's been asking for our families to meet, and invited us over for dinner on Friday. Think your boss will let you off at a normal time? She wants to do it around seven."

"I'll make him," Wayne promised, a pat on Eddie's head as he made his way to bed.

~~~

"I haven't worn nice clothes since you got baptized." Wayne chuckled, buttoning up his last button, then tucking his shirt into his jeans.

"I'm baptized?" Eddie laughed, also tucking his button-up into his jeans.

"Oh yeah, your mom did it for your grandma before she died. Are you ready?" Wayne asked, grabbing the keys.

~~~

"Eddie!" Y/N cheered, her arms wrapped around him as she snuggled into his neck. She soaked in his warmth for a second before she pulled away. Her eyes were on the older man next to Eddie. She smiled and brought him into a hug as well.

"Oh!" Wayne chuckled, hugging her back softly.

"Eddie talks about you all the time. Nice to see the man that inspires him." Y/N said as she pulled away. Wayne smiled back at her kindness. She had a sweet voice and a bright smile. He could easily see why Eddie fell so fast.

"Nice to meet the girl Eddie constantly talks about. I see he was right about how beautiful you are." Wayne smiled, and Y/N felt herself blush as she looked at Eddie. Her was art warm when he talked about her and believed she was beautiful.

"Well, I'll lead you to the dining room!" She said. Her black dress swayed at the bottom as she turned around. Her heels clicked on the marble floor as the boys followed behind her. Wayne tried to not let his jaw drop as he took in the huge house. The chandelier on the ceiling, the velvet furniture, the plants, and wall art. She came from money, and she came from lots of money.

Eddie was in awe of her house. He didn't think these houses were real. It looked like a scene from a movie. He knew she was rich, but he didn't know she was that rich. She didn't act spoiled, she was humble and even had a part-time job. She wasn't a snob, Eddie wouldn't have guessed she came from this much money based on how she acted.

"Daddy, this is Eddie! My boyfriend, and his uncle, Wayne!" Y/N held Eddie's hand as she introduced them to her dad. Her dad stood up from the table, his eyes settled on the younger man next to his daughter. Then they moved to the older man next to him.

"Son of a bitch." Wayne muttered to himself. Eddie quickly looked at him with confusion. Y/N looked between her dad and Wayne. Not understand why the air got so thick.

"You didn't tell me you were dating a Munson boy." Her dad sneered. Y/N didn't like the way he said Munson like it was a curse.

"Well he didn't mention he was dating a Y/L/N" Wayne growled back. Both men racing their chins higher and higher.

"Away from that boy now!" Her dad said, walking over to yank her arm. Y/N gasped as her grip lost Eddie's.

"Daddy!" She hissed, she couldn't believe his behavior. "What is the problem?"

"That man is a shame excuse of a man. He is scum at the bottom of the earth and you will not be dating no family member of his." He demanded, Y/N felt panic in her chest. Worriedly looking at Eddie.

"Sir, please just give us a chance. I'm not sure how you know Wayne, but he isn't scum! And neither am I. I love your daughter and I know I can take care of her." Eddie tried.

"Not. He works for me! I know exactly how much of a pathetic man he is. How can you take care of her when you are poor, Eddie? My baby girl doesn't belong in a tiny trailer."

"Stop it! You are being so rude." Y/N said, yanking her arm from her dad's grip. She stood productively in front of Eddie. "Eddie is a very nice boy and I love him. How much money he's got has nothing to do with anything."

"You are not dating him. That's an order."

"You can't tell me what to do! We don't need your support." Y/N snapped, her eyes angry as she stared down her dad.

"We have Wayne's and that's all we need," Eddie said, his hand reaching out to grasp hers softly.

"Eddie, you break up this relationship right now," Wayne said Eddie's eyes were huge as he turned around to look at his uncle. Shock is written all over his face.

Y/N's dad smiled as Wayne agreed. Maybe they could have this one small thing in common.

"Wayne!" Eddie exclaimed. He couldn't believe Wayne would suggest that. Y/N felt her heart crack as she turned to look at Wayne.

"Eddie, that man is evil. He is a snob, rude, and will forever look down on the people below him. I'm sure the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. You are getting out while you still can. You are not dating a spoiled brat." Wayne spat out.

"Wayne!" Eddie scolded, he couldn't believe Wayne would speak so poorly of Y/N, he barely gave her a chance. In the same way, Dad barely gave Eddie the chance.

"Wayne, please. I know my dad is a boss man but I would never look down on you or Eddie. I'm so sorry for his behavior, but please I love Eddie. Don't do this." Y/N begged. She knew her dad was a loss cause, she needed Wayne to be on their side.

"It's Mr. Munson, Eddie we are leaving. Say goodbye and meet me in the car." Wayne spat, he turned around and walked out the door.

"Break up with the boy or Wayne is fired. You will not be talked about like that. He disrespected my daughter in my house!" Her dad threatened, his arms crossed as he looked down at the couple. He ignored the pain in his daughter's eyes but enjoyed the fear in Eddie's.

"Eds." Y/N whimpered, her eyes watery as the world crashed at their feet. She didn't want to lose him.

"Y/N, I gave an order. I want him out of my house and out of your life." Her dad said before he left the room.

"What do we do?" Eddie asked

"We have to break up." Y/N choked out, her eyes watered and her throat burned.

"Baby no! We'll make your dad change his mind! I'll make him, I promise!" Eddie panicked.

"I'm sorry. That job is all you guys have. I can't be the reason he gets fired, he'll hate me even more." Y/N couldn't live with that guilt. "I'm sorry." Y/N whimpered, sobs making its way out of her mouth. She covered her cries with her hands.

"He doesn't hate you! I'll make him change his mind and give you a chance!"

"Eddie, it's me or the job. Wayne would never accept us if it cost him his job, his income, and his source to support you. But soon I'll have money saved to move out, we will graduate and we can be together. Just wait for me?" She cried.

"Yes," Eddie said with no hesitation. He'd wait years for her.

"I love you," Eddie whispered, leaning down to softly kiss her goodbye. He felt his heart sink as he tasted her salty tears.

"I love you." She whispered. She watched as he walked out the door.

Eddie tried to hold back his sobs as he got in the car. He didn't look at Wayne the whole drive. The betrayal in Eddie's heart was the worst pain he'd ever felt. Out of everyone in the world, he thought Wayne would always have his back.

The car ride was silent, a few blocks away from home when Wayne finally spoke up.

"Look, I know you-" Wayne tried

"No! You don't know. I can't believe you would talk to her that way. You disrespected my girlfriend right to her face. She has done nothing to you. It's her fucking dad! Yeah, I get that. But you did not need to treat her like that." Eddie snapped.

"Eddie, you are too young to understand. But she will turn out just like him. She'll be selfish and think she's above you. You'll thank me in the end." Wayne said.

"You don't know her. You don't know anything about her." Eddie argued. "She's nothing like him. She is sweet, kind, and would do anything for the people she loves."

Wayne laughed and shook his head. "She has you fooled." The car came to a stop as they pulled up to their trailer.

"Make sure you send her a thank you card for saving your ass from being fired." Eddie snapped as he slammed the car door. He raced into the trailer and locked himself in his room.

~~~

Y/N knew she'd never forgive her dad for what he did. She'd never forgive him for making her break it off with Eddie. She'd never forgive him for not letting her be happy. Her mom tried to make everyone civil, but dinners were silent. Y/N refused to speak or look at her dad.

"How was school?" Her mom asked, slicing her steak.

"Fine," Y/N muttered. She picked at her plate, not much of an appetite. The breakup with Eddie was the most painful thing she's ever experienced. It's been days of silence. Days of longing look from across the classroom. Days of crying in her room when all she wanted to do was be in Eddie's arms.

"Did you talk to that boy?" Her dad asked, his eyes squinting at her over his newspaper.

"No."

"Good girl."

~~~

Wayne sighed as he walked into the trailer, complete silence. It's been days of Eddie locked up in his room. He only left for school, then right back into his bedroom.

"Did you eat?" Wayne asked as he knocked on the door.

"No," Eddie said through the door.

Wayne ordered pizza, sitting on the couch as his nephew stayed locked in his room. Wayne was conflicted, he knew Eddie liked Y/N and that the breakup was hard. But Wayne couldn't help but like the relief of his boss' attitude towards him. It was like banning Eddie from seeing his daughter was a win. He let Wayne go home at normal times and didn't give random tasks.

In the end, it worked out for Wayne, but was it worth it if his nephew had to suffer?

Eddie came out when the pizza arrived. He stacked up a paper plate and went to walk back into his room.

"Can we talk for a second?" Wayne asked, Eddie sighed but sat down.

"I know you're hurting. I know these past few weeks have been hard for you. I can see my actions have hurt you. It's hard for me to admit, but I was wrong. I spent years trying to get you to smile and enjoy life. Ever since I took you in, there was this light missing in your eyes. I took you to parks, bowling, and arcades, and yet you never smiled. You grew up and still, that light wasn't there. You never enjoyed living. Then you met her. And one day, I saw that light in your eyes. I see that smile when you talk about her. I'm sorry I took that away from you, Eds." Wayne said, choking slightly as he felt tears falling down his face. "I'm so sorry. I want that light back in your eyes. I want you to have something to live for."

Eddie choked back his cries as he watched Wayne break down.

"She makes me happy, Uncle Wayne," Eddie whispered, biting his lip harshly as he felt sobs making their way into his throat.

"You have my blessing. Get her back." Wayne said, he reached out and rubbed Eddie's hand softly.

"It means a lot. But she broke it off so you could keep your job. Her dad threatened to fire you. She'll never do that to you." Eddie said, "But thank you."

Wayne watched as he got up and went back into his room.

He knew what he had to do to make it up to his nephew.

~~~

"Sir, can I come in?" Wayne asked as he knocked on his boss's door.

"Yes." His boss sat at his big desk, his hands under his chin as he waited for Wayne to speak.

"I quit," Wayne said, folding his uniform and placing it on the desk.

"Excuse me?" His boss scoffed.

"Eddie or the job, right? Your daughter and I have something in common. We both love that boy and it's time he gets picked. I pick Eddie. I'm accepting your daughter, because of the way she brightens up my boy's world. If you can't see he does the same for her, then maybe you don't love her the way you should." Wayne said, not waiting for a response as he left the office.

~~~

Eddie was doing homework in the kitchen when Wayne walked in.

"It's like three? How did you get off that early?" Eddie chuckled.

"I quit."

"WHAT?" Eddie yelled, standing up from his chair.

"He can't fire me if I don't work for him," Wayne smirked.

"But Wayne! We need the money."

"I'll get a job somewhere else. You are more important than any job. I'm sorry I stood in the way of your relationship, but now there won't be any consequences."

"Thank you." Eddie smiled, tears in his eyes as he pulled Wayne into a tight hug. Wayne smiled as a few tears left his eyes. That smile was back.

And so was she

~~~

"CHEATER!" Y/N screamed, her accusing fingers pointed to Eddie as he tried to tuck cards under his plate.

"AM NOT!" he yelled back. His hand crumbled up another card he tried to hide. His girlfriend's eyes were watching his every move.

"WAYNE!" she yelled, the older man got off the couch and walked to the table. The board game is on the table, dice everywhere, and a mess of cards.

"Check his hand." She said a smile on her face. She knew Eddie was about to be caught.

"Wayne! Who are you gonna believe? Me or her?" Eddie gasped

"Your girlfriend." Wayne laughed, easily tackling Eddie to the floor as he tried to get the card out of his hand.

"GOT IT!" Wayne cheered, snatching the crumbled card. He held out his hand and yanked Eddie to his feet. Then placed the card in Y/N's hand.

"I knew it!" She said, slamming down the card she needed to win.

"Thank you, Uncle Wayne." She laughed as she high-fived him.

"He always cheats," Wayne whispered, leaning down to kiss the top of her head. "Now I'm off to bed. Try not to be too loud. Big day tomorrow!"

"Good luck at the job interview," Y/N said, Wayne thanked her as he shut his bedroom door.

He smiled as he crawled into bed, the sound of Eddie's laughter and Y/N's screams filled the trailer.

Now the sound of that was worth quitting a job for.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson fanfic #eddie stranger things #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson request #eddie munson angst #eddie munson fluff x reader #eddie munson angst x reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x cheerleader #eddie munson x cheerleader! reader #ashwhowrites

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wheeboo · 8 months

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wilted | kim mingyu

SYNOPSIS. in which you've contracted hanahaki despite being in a relationship, and it makes you question everything. PAIRING. kim mingyu x gn!reader (ft. jeonghan) GENRE. angst, established relationship, hanahaki au WARNINGS. descriptions of illness (hanahaki disease), mentions of coughing and blood, mention of death, cursing, terms of endearment, miscommunication or honestly lack of communication, depictions of an argument, gyu is a little bit of an ass in this and i'm very sorry about that but it's for the plot, description of hospitals and surgery, unrequited love WORD COUNT. 6.1k

hanahaki disease ( 花吐き病 ) 𑁋 a disease in which the infected coughs up flowers due to unrequited love.

notes: this entire story was inspired from this post which i hoped i was able to stick to :)

A shift has never been this relaxing before.

Normally, you're used to the hectic hustle of weary students aiming to acquire their morning coffees before running to class and impatient corporate workers racing against the clock in the bustling jungle of the city. But today, the scene was drastically different.

The clear blue skies outside were barren of any existence of clouds, the sun rays pouring in through the café windows like warm honey and casting ornate patterns of light and shadow on the rustic wooden tables that filled the vast space. In the midst of this fresh and sunny afternoon, you find yourself standing idly behind the counter, fingers rhythmically tapping on your phone as you shoot a text message to your boyfriend.

[ 04:39pm | y/n ] gyu ! should i bring home something for us to eat tonight? been craving that gimbap from a while ago 💕

The message sends before your attention would be halted by the chime of the doors opening.

You've worked as a barista in this café for the past year while searching (or struggling, to be honest) to get a job in the field you sought for. It's easy to give yourself credit when it comes to plastering on the brightest smile on your face every time the bell above the doors would ring. You can be having the worst day of your life, yet you've mastered the skill of hiding your worries beneath that obnoxious apron and sage green logo-emblazoned hat sat on your head.

It's a bit different this time when the customer who walks in is someone you're beginning to consider a regular at your café.

"Ah, Mr. Yoon," You greet him with a shake of your head and a wide grin. "The usual today, I'm presuming?"

"That is, if you can stop putting down 'Mr. Yoon' on my cup than my first name," he responds teasingly, and it makes you lightly chuckle as you lower your gaze to start tapping in his order on the screen.

Mr. Yoon, as he preferred to be called initially as a running gag, had become a latest fixture in the café, like a light-hearted charm that captures the attention of both you and your co-workers. It's rare to see people like him walk in. His visits were characterised not just by his liking for the café's signature caramel macchiato, but also by the easy banter and warm camaraderie he shared each time he visited that makes your busy shifts a little more bearable.

"Okay, Jeonghan," You reply playfully, reading out his order even though you know it's correct. "One caramel macchiato with a pinch of wit, coming right up."

He lets out a chuckle as he hands you his card with a wink. "You're the best, you know that?"

You flash him one last smile before facing your back towards him to prepare his order. "Flattery will get you anywhere, Mr. Yoon."

You take your time in creating his order, looking up briefly to notice he had sat himself down at one of the tables in the corner of the café. You carefully pour the steamed milk over the espresso and caramel, and when you finish, you place the perfectly crafted caramel macchiato on a tray and carry it over to Jeonghan's table.

"Here you go, Mr. Yoon," You say with a smile, bringing the tray down and placing the cup in front of him. "One caramel macchiato, just the way you like it."

Jeonghan takes a moment to properly observe it, as if examining the crevices of each layer in the cup, before leaning back in chis hair and crossing his arms together. He lets out a relaxing sigh.

"Congratulations, you've earned yourself a perfect score this time." He turns the cup just slightly to show off that you've indeed put the order down under his first name.

You roll your eyes. "Well, I'm glad to have gotten it right."

"It's about time, don't you think?" Jeonghan queries, before taking a sip of the drink, eliciting a satisfied hum. "Mmh, but it was definitely worth the wait. Thank you, Y/N."

You grab the empty tray back in your hands. "If you need me, you know where to find me."

Jeonghan just shoots you one last playful smirk in your direction before you turn away to head back around the counter, pushing yourself through your next set of customers.

However, as time continues to pass so torturously slow, an unusual sensation begins to creep into the core of your chest.

It's like a subtle tickle, a slight tightness to your trachea that you merely dismiss just as fatigue from the dry air as you strap the lid on the order of a cup you're preparing. You take a moment to rub your chest absently, hoping the discomfort will pass, but it lingers.

Yet once you set the order down on the customer's table and dismiss yourself back behind the counter, you let out a small, involuntary cough into the palm of your hand. It's nothing, you tell yourself. You're probably just coming down with a minor cold.

But then, you see it𑁋a very small delicate, pale pink petal resting on your hand where you had covered your mouth, and that's when you feel your heart drop down to your feet.

This can't be happening, You think frantically. Not now. Not like this. You glance around nervously, hoping no one else was watching or waiting for you at the front. The café is still bustling with customers, and the regular chatter continues, completely oblivious to your growing panic.

As you stare at the petal, it begins to crumble, disintegrating into tiny flecks that drift away like dust in the wind down to the floor below. The feeling in your chest, however, remains, and it intensifies. It's like a weight, an ache that refuses to dissipate, and sets the adrenaline to your limbs as you dash towards the employee's only restroom, locking the door behind you.

You place your hands on either side of the sink, the coughs leaving your mouth now bouncing off the walls of the restroom. The coughs wrack your body. Each one doesn't bloom out a petal, but as you release one last cough, you watch as another petal slowly floats down in the sink below your gaze.

Then you look at your reflection in the mirror, and it reveals nothing out of the ordinary. No flowers sprouting from your mouth or bloodstained petals; it was purely only just... fresh petals.

Your mind runs circles. It physically hurts to even think, like twist and turns on an abandoned dirt road. If what you're suffering from is really what you think it is, then your thoughts dash back to him. To Mingyu, whom you've been with for the past two years, and the thought of him makes your heart race. Thinking about him helps just slightly, but not entirely, yet... what is causing this?

You're still in love with Mingyu𑁋you know you are.

You splash cold water on your face, trying to collect your thoughts and the pain wracking your chest. This can't be happening. It's impossible that you'd suddenly develop Hanahaki for someone else.

You quickly take out your phone from your back pocket, punching in your passcode and sliding to your text messages. Your fingers instinctively land on Mingyu's text thread, punching in words in a panic for some help. But when your eyes trail to the last message you sent to him, you notice that it was simply left on... seen.

That's when another cough racks your body, and you can't help but watch in horror as more petals, delicate and pink, fall into the sink, before wilting and crumbling down the drain. It felt like they were mocking you in shame.

Hanahaki disease. An illness described to be acquired from unrequited love.

The doctor explained the options to you: surgery to remove the flowers with the risk of losing your feelings for the person you love, medication to suppress the symptoms with the risk of some side effects, or the most common method𑁋reciprocated love. If the person you love returns your feelings, the disease will fade away on its own. However, if those feelings remain unrequited, the flowers will continue to grow, ultimately suffocating you.

And you would die.

Because that's exactly the kind of news you wanted to torment your life with. It's like a fucking parasite, a cruel insidious joke taking root in your chest. A fucking plant is growing in your fucking chest. Hanahaki disease was rare, but it had chosen you, and it had chosen to do so at the most inconvenient time.

You've heard the stories of the disease from the countless articles you searched on your phone the moment you got back into your car. You've also heard these stories growing up like an urban legend, even in its rarity, at some point becoming deathly afraid of it when you were younger, yet your own family had reassured you that no other person even down to your ancestors had ever been affected with the disease.

You're the first person. How fucking lucky are you.

You were lucky enough to catch it in its early stages, explaining to the doctor that you had never once had any other signs show other than today.

"It doesn't mean you have a lot of time to pick a treatment option," the doctor had said to you as you blankly listened. "I recommend getting it treated as soon as possible, no matter how early it may be, because waiting it out could be detrimental to your state. I'm going to prescribe you some medication to help reduce your symptoms. You can pick up at the pharmacy after this."

But you just... don't understand. None of this has been making sense in your head; it's just been buzzing painfully with confusion, and if anything, making you feel even worser than the actual disease plaguing your body itself. You've always been faithful to Mingyu; you've never harboured romantic feelings for anyone else other than him. You tell him that you love him, and he tells you that he loves you too.

Yet here you are, coughing up petals that seem to defy logic and the rules of this damn disease, trying to think of someone, anyone, who may have slipped past a crack in your heart somewhere.

But it all draws a blank, yet it's the only thing in mind that can be causing all this.

The doctor's words echo in your mind. Surgery came with the risk of losing your feelings for Mingyu, something that you couldn't bear to imagine. Medication can help suppress the symptoms temporarily, but it wouldn't cure the underlying cause. That left you with the most daunting option𑁋reciprocated love.

But how could you possibly explain this to Mingyu? How could you tell him that you were coughing up petals because of some inexplicable turmoil in your heart that had nothing to do with him?

You can't do this. Not right now. God, you need sleep.

"Gyu?" You call out, your voice echoing within the quietness of your shared apartment.

Stepping into your apartment, you're initially met with silence, but it wasn't until you hear a door shut that awakens your senses, and you see Mingyu stepping out of your shared bedroom. For a few moments, you let your eyes trail over him, seemingly dressed up like he was going to an outing, and you feel your lips twitch unconsciously.

"Babe?" You call out again, a bit louder this time, and it catches Mingyu's attention.

A faint smile crosses his face as he makes his way toward you, and for a second you can feel something catch in your throat once you can feel his warmth touch your skin.

"Hey," he greets you calmly, pushing away a strand of hair behind your ear. "How was work?"

"It was..." Tell him, Your mind urges. Tell him right now. "...fine. Nothing much today."

"That's good," he responds, locking the watch on his wrist in place.

"Are you going somewhere?" You ask him quickly, shifting your eyes up and down and over his form.

Mingyu's expression changes slightly, becoming almost tense, a flicker of hesitation in his eyes before it changes back to that lazy smile he had on before. You swear that if you weren't so hyperfocused with every fibre of your being pulling you back, you wouldn't have noticed.

"Just some dinner with the guys. Haven't seen them in a while," he responds coolly, brushing past you for a moment to grab the keys hanging next to the door. "Do you want me to bring you something back?"

You watch Mingyu's every move, the unease and some discomfort from the disease in your chest growing by the unbearable minute, even with the increasing tension in the room that's absolutely suffocating you at the same time. This isn't the time to let your guard down, but you're torn between the fear of losing him and the need to protect him from this awful reality.

But... he's going out? And he didn't tell you? Nor even bother responding to the text you sent him earlier? He was probably just busy, You think. Like he always is.

"No, it's alright." You take a chance and step up to him, planting a brief kiss to his cheek. You feel a little bit better doing that. "I'll just heat up something from the fridge. Have a good time with your friends, okay? I love you."

Mingyu smiles softly at your gesture, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes. And you swear you notice a distant look in his gaze, or maybe you were just imagining things and it's just another symptom of this stupid disease and your fervent overthinking. The dimness of your apartment didn't help either𑁋his eyes just looked drained of any colour. Maybe he was just tired.

"Thanks, Y/N." He offers one last smile, but there's something lacking in his tone that you can't quite place, and it's anything but comforting you at the moment. "Love you too."

Your heart quickens just a bit at that, the corners of your lips edging up just slightly as you watch him. He grabs his jacket and heads for the door, and you're left behind in nothing but the silence of your place.

And all at once, you feel all the discomfort you were trying to hide finally spill out from your lips, coughs leaving your mouth like a downpour, each one a bit more painful than the last. You double over with one of your arms wrapped around you and the other clutching at your chest as if trying to physically grasp the pain and pull it out of you.

"Shit, dammit," You murmur weakly, bringing your hand down from your mouth to see a few petals fluttering to the floor, feeling the tears brimming at the corner of your eyes.

You bring yourself back up, opening up your bag and taking out the medication you picked up from the pharmacy earlier. Trailing down to the bathroom, the medication bottle rattles loudly in your shaky hand as you fumble to open the cap. The pills inside are small and white, and the label on the bottle provides instructions for dosage. With shaking fingers, you fish out one pill and place it on your palm.

Then you take a deep breath, attempting to steady your nerves, and then swallow it down with a gulp of water from the bathroom sink.

You hope that it will provide some relief, even if it's just temporary.

You don't know what time Mingyu comes home that night. You heard him come in, but don't have the energy to properly acknowledge him. So you stay low to your sheets, feeling some residual discomfort crawl back into your throat when you hear him open the bedroom door.

You wish he can hold you𑁋it's all you want right now. His comfort, his large arms wrapping around you like how he used to do so before, how he would kiss the top of your head and your shoulder before holding you close in his embrace, the way it felt so right and safe being in his hold because you know it's enough to make all your worries disappear in an instant.

But he doesn't, only sliding into the empty space next to you, and you're afraid that if he does it just might make you feel even worse. You barely feel his warmth on you. Yet you miss him; you miss everything about him. And you still love him. You always have.

You always will.

...right?

It's not right to tell him right now.

You certainly wouldn't like it if someone was staring at you, but you can't help it, not when Mingyu is the only other thing in the room you could possibly look at.

It's been more than a week since you found out you have Hanahaki. Each day you would wake up in an absolute coughing fit, the petals coming in more frequent amounts than before. The medication has helped to lessen the symptoms, yet the side effects are taking a toll on your body. You're constantly fatigued, and your appetite has declined just slightly. You feel like a prisoner in your own body, all because something beautiful and deadly is growing within you.

Mingyu still doesn't know about it. And deep down, you can't shake the feeling that something is... different.

He used to be so attentive with you. Now, he often seems preoccupied, lost in his own thoughts. He no longer surprises you with sweet gestures or random acts of affection, and the warm, lingering kisses that he would leave to your lips have turned into quick pecks on the cheek, or simply, just nothing at all. You hardly wake up with him right next to you because of his work, and the shared laughter and late night conversations have nearly ceased to exist.

You remember the days when Mingyu used to look at you with such warmth, love, and adoration, but the spark that used to light up his eyes has dimmed. You barely feel it anymore. His replies to your questions asking about his day are kept brief. You would excuse it as him simply being exhausted, but there's a persistent feeling in your chest, and it's not just from your illness.

"Gyu?" You call out for him meekly from the kitchen, watching as he doesn't peel his eyes away from his laptop screen, only lifting a brow up slightly. "Are you busy later?"

"Yeah, I am. I got invited to a company dinner later this evening."

There's a visible downturn to your lips at his words, but he doesn't see it𑁋doesn't bother to see it, anyway.

"Oh." You feel it crawling up your throat again. "Okay. How about tomorrow?"

Mingyu finally looks away from his laptop, his gaze lingering on you for a moment before he sighs. "Tomorrow's not good either. I have a meeting with a client, and it might go late."

"Maybe the day after tomorrow?" You suggest, some desperation creeping into your voice.

Mingyu seems to hesitate for a moment, and you hold your breath, hoping for a glimmer of hope, something. But then he shakes his head. "I can't promise anything, Y/N. I'm sorry. I'll be sure to make up to you, okay?"

That's what you always say.

Will you ever make time for me again someday?

You swallow hard, feeling a lump in your throat. The realisation stings, more painful than the illness taking form in your lungs.

"Okay," You mumble, your voice barely above a whisper. "I understand. It's okay. I love you."

A brief, long, pause. "Love you too."

But it's okay, because you still love me.

Then you find yourself swiftly retreating into your bathroom, heart heavy as you grab a tissue and let out a few coughs into the tissue. More petals fall from your mouth, before you crumple the tissue and toss it into the bin next to the sink, then splash some water on your face to hide the tears that threaten to escape.

You don't know what to do.

You can't even bother to see how much pills you have left because you feel like you're taking ten of them every damn day. You have yet to tell a soul, and you know that you should before it's too late, but who you can turn to? You have no one𑁋you can't even figure out yourself why this is even happening to you without feeling like you're going absolutely manic.

It's been hard trying to hide the fallen petals away from Mingyu, or away from anyone, in fact, and you find yourself coughing up more petals even when you're just in the same room as him. You always have to discreetly spit them into a tissue or rush to the bathroom to dispose of them, hoping he doesn't notice.

You hardly even see Mingyu anymore. It's either he's always called into work, has something important to do with the guys, or you feel it snaking up your throat painful enough for you to not make a move. The words stick in your throat, and the fear of losing him freezes you up. You can't help but blame yourself for being so distant around him.

If you've really fallen out of love out of him, if you did supposedly fall for someone else, wouldn't that mean that... you're leading him on? It's a thought at the back of your mind, but the guilt gnaws at you day by day like the ever-growing branches piercing through your lungs.

It's frustrating. All of this frustrating, and it's obviously spilled into your work performance as well. You can hardly perfect orders without making mistakes, and your once bright smile has faded into a forced, weary expression. Your manager and co-workers have given you concerned looks, but you've brushed them off, simply claiming it as stress or lack of sleep.

But it doesn't hit hard until today, because it happens so fast𑁋the metal tray you're holding loudly suddenly crashing down to the floor. One moment you can't breathe, and the next you're letting out hacking coughs into your hands, knees dropped to the floor with the spilled coffee staining your pants and shoes.

The café erupts into chaos as some customers quickly rush to your side, a hand still covering your face. You can hardly respond to anyone from the intense heaviness to your chest and dry pain to your throat.

You feel the petals tickling the skin of your hand, quickly crumpling them up in a fist and stuffing them inside the pocket of your apron.

"Y/N, are you okay?" a familiar voice asks worriedly, Jeonghan's voice, who you served earlier, and you catch a glimpse of him kneeling down beside you.

You can't look at him. Tears well up in your eyes, but you blink them back, doing your best to keep whatever you had left of your composure. You force a weak smile as you bring your hand down to the side.

"Yeah," You croak out, voice raspy and barely audible. "I'm fine, just a little dizzy."

Jeonghan doesn't seem convinced, his eyes trailing over you carefully. You only look past him and keep your gaze low, but it wasn't until you catch sight of a fallen petal resting by your shoes.

And he also sees it as well. Jeonghan's gaze flickers downward, his eyes narrowing as he spots the pale pink petal, and something in his expression changes.

Then he looks back up at you, giving a faint smile, yet serious look.

"Let me take you to the doctor," he urges.

"What? Jeonghan, I can't𑁋"

"I'm taking them to the doctor," he tells one of your co-workers passing by with a broom to clean up the mess you brought to the floor, completely cutting off your words.

You can hardly believe your eyes and ears right now. Your co-worker only nods and quickly takes over your duties while Jeonghan helps you to your feet. Despite your protests, he guides you outside the café, keeping a loose grip on your arm before you get yourself to separate from him in a brief panic.

"Jeonghan, you can't just𑁋just take me out of work like this."

He shoots you a bewildered look. "You're sick, Y/N. It's obvious."

"I know, and I'm fine. It's just stress and bad sleep. Please, just take me back to the café𑁋"

"You have Hanahaki," he says flatly and outright. "I've seen you cough them up. You don't have to hide it from me."

Jeonghan's words hang in the air like an anchor sinking in the ocean. You freeze, your heart pounding in your chest, and your mind races to find some way to deny it, to deflect the truth. But deep down, you know he's right.

Jeonghan, however, doesn't press you for an explanation. Instead, he takes you by the wrist gently and drags you to his car parked nearby.

"Jeonghan𑁋"

"I've had it, Y/N. I've had Hanahaki before," he confesses, a solemn look to his face as his words sink inside you.

You're quiet for a few moments as his words hang suspended in the air, a heavy silence between you two. Hearing that kind of news is from him is oddly... both surprising and comforting, knowing how how rare the illness is. But maybe just maybe, he might understand what you're going through, even if you can't seem to understand yourself.

Once you finally slide into the passenger seat of his car, you manage to get your voice back.

"You've... had it? I mean, just... what happened... how did you get rid of it?"

Once the car engine roars to life, Jeonghan just releases a small chuckle.

"It's the usual story: you fall in love with someone who doesn't love you back. It was terrifying, you know, seeing bits of your feelings turn into something physical like that. I waited too long, so I ended up getting the surgery." There's a shadow of some passing tree branches that cast on his face for a moment. "They never told me the surgery would also mean that my feelings would completely disappear, but it was the only way to save my life."

His face remains calm as he continues to drive, keeping his eyes on the road while your own thoughts were juggling together like a tangled mess of strings.

For a moment, Mingyu's face flashes in your mind, and you wish he were here with you. But you're torn. You don't want to burden him with this.

"I'm so sorry you had to go through that," You finally say, keeping your voice low. It was all you can say at the moment.

Once the car stops at a red light, he turns to you with a small, sad smile. "Don't be. It was a long time ago, and it taught me a lot of lessons, you could say. I survived, and you will too."

Another round of silence passes through the car, but this one feels less heavy, more contemplative. You watch the passing scenery outside the window as your thoughts continue to whirl like a storm within your mind. Knowing that Jeonghan survived offers a glimmer of hope, but it also deepens your sense of isolation𑁋that you can't lean on Mingyu for support in the same way.

You don't want to lose your feelings for him. You've already built this start of a future with him, and you can't bear the thought of basically removing him from your life for no solid reason.

"I-I have a boyfriend, you know," You blurt out, interrupting the silence, hearing Jeonghan let out an acknowledging hum for you to go on. "We've been together for the past two years, and whenever the... coughing, petals, all this started happening, it confused me."

"The heart is a complicated place," Jeonghan assures you.

You faintly smile at that. "I still love him, I'm sure of that. I know I do. I've never had feelings for anyone else. I just... I can't figure out why this is happening, why I'm coughing up these stupid petals in the first place, and it's been eating me up inside. It hurts."

Jeonghan listens intently as you pour your heart out, his eyes fixed on the road ahead but his attention fully on you. When you finish speaking, he clears his throat.

"You haven't... told him yet, haven't you?" he asks softly, breaking the silence.

You shake your head. "No, I haven't. I-I've just been... scared that I've been pushing him away, leading him on and I don't know about it. What if... if my heart is just betraying me? And now, with this... I don't know what to do."

Jeonghan's lips purse together thoughtfully.

"I think... If you know you love someone, you do," he says. "But... what makes you certain that he loves you back in the same way?"

Jeonghan's question hits you like a ton of bricks. It's a question you've been dying to avoid for this entire time, a fear that's been lurking in the shadows of your heart and the deepest corners of your mind.

What if... Mingyu didn't love you back?

The thought startles a cough out of you and you hastily bring your hand to your mouth, suppressing it as much as you can, the fragile petals fluttering out and settling on your lap. Squinting your eyes just slightly, you notice how they appear more redder than the usual pink you were used to seeing. You clench your hand around them, knuckles white from the tension, and swallow hard. Jeonghan shoots a quick glance of worry in your direction.

"I... I don't know," You utter out shakily. And what if I don't want to know?

The rest of the car ride is relatively quiet with the occasional taps of Jeonghan's fingers on the steering wheel, but not uncomfortably so. You can sense the concern radiating off Jeonghan, but he doesn't push you to talk further.

"You need to talk to him, Y/N," is all he says after turning into the parking lot of the doctor's office.

Once you get out of his car, you turn back to Jeonghan and give him a light wave.

I know, You tell yourself in your head. I know I do.

You stare blankly at the dark red petal in your hand, its edges slightly crumpled from where it had been caught between your trembling fingers. You can hear the faint ticking of the clock on the wall itching at your skin, a constant reminder that time is passing, and you're running out of it.

Balling the petal in your hand, you stand up from where you sat on the bed and march out the bedroom. For a second, you felt like you weren't in control of your legs, yet you know you have to take advantage of the chance to muster up the courage to finally tell Mingyu everything.

Not just about the Hanahaki, but about... everything that has been suffocating you inside. It's all you've been thinking about for the past few weeks. When you step into the living room, you spot him sitting at your small dining set, focused on his work as ever with the laptop screen in front of him casting a glow to his face. He doesn't even look up when you announce your presence near him, and your heart clenches at that.

Taking a deep breath, you speak up, "Mingyu, we need to talk."

Mingyu doesn't look up, his focus still on his work, brows furrowing together. "Can it wait, Y/N? I'm in the middle of something important."

You hesitate for a moment, feeling something inside you wince at his words. "No, it can't wait. It's about us."

"Y/N, it's one in the morning right now𑁋"

"Do you even still love me anymore?" The question leaves your mouth all at once, and you swear it even freezes this exact moment that you are in.

The room falls into a suffocating silence. Mingyu finally tears his gaze away from the laptop, his eyes meeting yours. In that moment, you see a complex mix of emotions in his eyes: surprise, guilt, and something else you can't quite place.

"I..." he starts, voice shaky. "Y/N, you can't just𑁋"

"Just answer the fucking question, Kim Mingyu." You clench the petal in your hand, feeling its dry, sharp edges dig into your skin. Then you realise the harshness to your words, softening your eyes and lowering your voice. "Please."

The room seems to close in around you as you wait for Mingyu's response. His hesitation hangs in the air, and you see the way his shoulders slump and the way his face contorts as he struggles to find the right words to say to just a simple question.

"I... I don't know, Y/N."

His words stab your heart. It's getting hard to breathe, but you can't let yourself cough now. Not in this moment. The petal in your hand crumples into dust as you clench it tighter.

"What the hell do you mean, you don't know?" Your voice trembles as you ask, searching his eyes for any sign of reassurance. "You either love me or you don't, just tell me, for God's sake."

Your frustration is evident, tone catching him off-guard. Mingyu's gaze drops to the table, and he lets out a heavy sigh.

"...I'm sorry, Y/N. I-I'm so so sorry."

His words hit you like a punch to the gut, and you can feel the tears welling up in your eyes. This is what you've been afraid of, what you've been trying to avoid. But now that it's out in the open, it feels like a heavy weight has been lifted, even if it's crushing you at the same time.

And then, you feel it𑁋a sharp pain to your lungs that makes you gasp as if you've been stabbed by a searing blade. The room spins as you struggle to catch your breath, your hands trembling as you clutch your chest, letting out harrowing coughs after coughs. Mingyu jumps up from his seat, immediately racing to your side.

"Y/N?! Shit, Y/N, you're bleeding𑁋"

You can't respond, the pain in your chest and the taste of blood in your mouth overwhelming your senses. You hold onto him for support as another bout of coughing consumes you. This isn't how you wanted to reveal your condition to him, but there's no hiding it now.

You feel the way Mingyu scoops you into his arms, the blood from your mouth and the petals staining his shirt as he reaches for his phone to dial emergency services. His voice is helpless and frantic, and within seconds, minutes, maybe even whole hour, you hear the distant wail of approaching sirens.

The soft hum of machines echo through the air as you stir awake, eyes fluttering open and the blinding white lights above blurring your vision. The first sensation that you register was the overwhelming scent of disinfectant filling your nose, sharp and pungent. Then came the dull ache in your chest that makes your breath quietly hitch.

Blinking your eyes open, you realise you're in a hospital room, the pale morning light filtering through the curtains. The sight of white walls and strange medical equipment, an IV line running into your arm, makes your heart race anxiously. You try to take a deep breath, but then you feel that ache in your chest again, and it makes you groan.

Just then at that moment, a young looking nurse enters the room, her eyes widening when she catches sight of you awake and distressed.

"Easy now," she says, rushing to your side and gently pushing you back down onto the bed. "You've just had surgery. You need to rest."

Surgery...?

You could only nod weakly, your throat too dry to speak. You watch as the nurse adjusts some of the monitors and checks your vitals, making sure everything was in place.

"Everything went well during the surgery," she reassures you. "But the hanahaki flowers had grown more aggressively than expected and showed signs of piercing through your lungs. It's a good thing we performed the emergency surgery when we did."

Hanahaki... The word lingers in your mind as you try to make sense of it all. Memories began to resurface: the petals mixing with your blood, the coughing fits, and... Mingyu. It all seemed so distant now, as if it had happened to someone else.

"You were lucky that we caught in time before the growth would have overtaken your lungs," the nurse says sympathetically while writing down your vitals on a chart.

Lucky. How ironic. You were alive, yes, but at what cost? You couldn't help but wonder if the surgery had taken more from you than just the hanahaki flowers.

And then it hits you.

There's no trace of the pain that had clawed at your chest for so long, except for the skin atop your heart where you can feel the incisions. The hanahaki flowers are gone, removed during the emergency surgery, but there's something else missing too𑁋your feelings, your love, for Mingyu.

You feel nothing. No pining, no longing, no aching heart. It's as if a weight has been lifted from your chest, but the emptiness is... disquieting, unnerving, just a void, a hole in place of where your warmth resided in.

You're no longer in love with Mingyu, just like he is for you.

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#kflixnet #k-labels #caratsland #seventeen imagines #seventeen angst #seventeen fluff #seventeen x reader #mingyu imagines #mingyu angst #mingyu x reader #kim mingyu imagines #kim mingyu angst #kim mingyu x reader #svt imagines #svt angst #svt x reader

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astrojulia · 1 year

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Disclaimer: These general free readings are made in good faith for entertainment purpose.

Warnings:There are piles that contain more personal subjects such as trauma.

Hello dear, how are you? The most votes PAC was Your True Passion, I am doing all the themes on the list little by little since all of them received votes. Thank you all for participating and I hope you enjoy your reading!

How to pick a pile

When you have different cards to choose from in pile 1,2,3… look at each of those cards. Wait until someone reminds you of a memory. Perhaps a character’s outfit resembles one of your own. It is this pile that has its message. What if they all remind me of something? Go for the one with the strongest memory, one might look like her earring but another might be the favorite candy you got from your grandma when you vacationed at her house. But what if none reminds me of something? Take a deep breath and wait a little longer, without charging yourself or creating worries. Relax, some will awaken some memory in you, I promise! .

Credits: Piles images: here. Template: here

Pile 1

Your true passion involves helping humanity in its most catastrophic moments. There is helping someone who needs a meal and there is helping someone who has lost everything and sees no reason to live, you're in the second case. This includes social assistance, medicine, fortune telling, firefighter, police officer... Jobs that often require you to see a person in their most vulnerable moment, jobs where you can save a life in various ways, witness various stories and change several lives.

To get closer to this today, you need energy, to have your own will to live and face life, today you no longer have that sparkle in your eyes, that fire in your soul... It may be due to physical, mental and psychological reasons. If it's physical, seek your nutritionist and doctor to give you the necessary vitamins. If it's mental, improve all your self-knowledge and look for books and courses that can improve your essence. If it's psychological, look for the most accessible therapy for you, don't give up, you're not lazy, you're unhealthy.

You can also do the spell from "Book of Spells" by Paulina Cassidy page 75:

Booster Walk You’ll need: - A music device and airphones; - A relaxing and safe route for walking; Make sure you’re wearing comfortable walking shoes. Put your phones on, and start walking quickly! As you breathe in and out, using long, deep breaths, imagine white light flowing through you, invigorating your body, mind and spirit. With every step, feel your energy boosting. Walk as long you feel this energy.

After you have reconnected with your essence, there are several ways to exercise your true passion in your life as a whole. Here I present three.

One of them is to help sick or vulnerable people such as children and the elderly. You will need a lot of spiritual strength, to live a life where you know that when you leave your house, your pains and problems are left behind and the only thing that matters is helping someone else. You will need to be a person who has the courage to do whatever it takes and assume all your responsibilities, because here you will have to embody all the stereotypes of what a responsible adult really is.

The second involves more writing, but not exactly creative writing, but rather a more didactic one, such as being a teacher of any type of subject. If you happen to be the type who hates studying out of responsibility, there is also the other side of living for dance,so the effort of living with your face in books and huge texts is all going to learn about your own body, in these two options they both involve a lot of teaching for future generations, you learn to accumulate knowledge and help the next person not to make the mistakes you made.

The third and last one talks about building communities that support people in their doubts and difficulties, creating a safe space where people can be their best version and this doesn't need to be anything grand, it can be a place where they can gather to have an afternoon coffee and talk about dreams and nightmares.

In all three options, there is a lot of hope for a better future and a confrontation against the cruelty of the world, you need to learn from your own tragedies, live them and leave them behind to help others.

Pile 2

Your true passion is to succeed in life, to be better than your parents ever were, to rub in the faces of people who bullied you in school that you are much better than them. For this, you will need to align two very difficult things... which are ego and humility. You will need to have a healthy self-esteem and ego to know that you are capable and humility to not think you are better than everyone else and step on others. What is lacking for you to do this today is motivation, it’s like you want to do something but can’t see any path to achieve that goal. I will give you a spell from my book, but know that to get what you want you will have to follow a different path from your friends and ancestors, you will have to chase your dreams alone and fight for them until they become a reality.

But to give you a little push now, I give you the spell from "Book of Spells" by Paulina Cassidy page 125-126:

The Garden of Motivation Take a section of the yard, if not possible pick a vase, you will consecrate as your motivation garden. Each day you will tend to it taking any amount of time needed. Weed, water, feed and care for this garden, picturing what you want it to be in the future. Add anything to your garden that makes you happy, such as wind chimes, garden sculptures, gemstones, outdoor candle holders and pretty stones. This is your garden, so make it and keep it a reflection of yourself, and your motivation. When weeding your garden, you’re in turn weeding away the negativity from you. As you nurture and cultivate this garden over time you’re nurturing and cultivating your own ambitions. As an extra tip, you can plant something and give it your dream name or even your own name. If you truly want results, you will enjoy the work to achieve them. Happy gardening!!!

There are always more than one way to achieve your dreams, I talk about three.

The first one talks much more about enjoying your own life than anything else, you know, there comes a point where we have everything we wanted years ago and still aren't happy because we want more things, that is, we didn't even enjoy all the effort we had. You will need to take a break from the rush of life from time to time to pamper yourself, to see how much you have achieved and be proud of what you already have.

The second way is to leave the city or country where you were born, maybe you already have the dream of living somewhere else, a connection with another culture that you don't even understand what it is, but for you to be happy with your life you you will need to face the fear of abandoning all the comfort and security of living in a place you already know to go somewhere you don't know.

The third is to do almost the same thing as the second, leave where you live (do you hate your home? just kidding), but now it's for work and study. Where is the best college you can go? Can you go there? You should.

All options speak of physically leaving the place where you are and not stressing yourself thinking about all the things you still need to do, but being aware that you are responsible for achieving your dreams without being tied to the future, enjoying the present and being proud from past.

Pile 3

Your true passion is independence. Not owing anything to anyone, not having to wait for someone else's decision to do what you want. You want to be rich and enjoy everything you have sown. You are afraid of having to ask for something from someone, since you want to be your own provider and what is lacking today is a more abundant look. There are times when you are very pessimistic, more afraid of running out of something than acquiring something, it's like you chase after things not because you want them, but because you're afraid of running out. It's like you go to work not because you want to spend the money to buy McDonald's or enter that course, but to not run out of money when you need it.

Something that can help you get rid of this fear of scarcity is the spell from "Book of Spells" by Paulina Cassidy page 147:

Prosperity Bath You’ll need: - Fresh ginger root; - A handful of cinnamon sticks; - A bunch of fresh basil; - A piece of cheesecloth and rubber band Put all ingredients into the cheesecloth and tie with the rubber band. Allow the pouch to soak in the water as you run your bath. When you step into your bath, relax and envision prosperity streaming to you. Know that you will receive all that you need. (Julia notes: normally we do our baths making a “tea” with the ingredients and at the end of your normal bath you pour the “tea” into your body, avoiding your head, and then you let your body dry naturally).

There are several ways to achieve your true passion, but I always mention three:

The first is going back to doing that childhood dream that you left behind a long time ago because you thought it didn't make money. What was? Sing, draw, write, paint? You can go back to doing what you like, but now as an adult you have the opportunity to study, take a course and improve your skills.

The second thing you can do is much more perverse... You hold a lot of grudges from people who hurted you. You carry a lot of trauma and anger and that's it, either you take revenge the way you want or leave all that behind and move on with your life, go to a therapist or solve your problems, the way you are now, no no matter what you do, it's going to be out of fear and not for passion.

The third talks about opening yourself up more to life's possibilities, you've been so locked up, so focused on survival and forgot that you can just live, the world is full of opportunities and you have the competence to put effort into something and make it your own work or hobby, you don't have to beat yourself up, you don't have to suffer to be worthy of happiness.

All options speak of fear and trauma, of how you are still chained to the past and it is not letting you be happy, know that time heals all wounds and that life does not give greater challenges than our own strength.

Pile 4

Your true passion is to answer "What is the meaning of life?", because you want to live it. There is a lot of curiosity here, wanting to know more, having answers to all questions and a tiredness of seeing that everything is always the same,like the world will never change. What you have control over and can change is yourself, the world will change... in very, very slow steps, until then, revitalize yourself every day.

Something that can help you have energy is the spell from "Book of Spells" by Paulina Cassidy page 184:

Vitality Broom Dance You’ll need: - A broom; - Citrus-scented incense, or citrus essential oil and an oil diffuser; - Upbeat music; Light the incense or oil diffuser. Begin playing the music. With your broom, begin sweeping the room in unison to the beat of the music. Sweep in a counterclockwise direction to purify the room and remove negative energies. Then, sweep clockwise direction to build harmony, balance and vitality. This spell will get your cells pulsating as you awaken the healing flow of vitality within and around you.

There are several ways to make your dreams come true, but I always indicate three:

The first is to pursue knowledge and get involved with younger people or those whom you have seen as ignorant until now. Everyone has their truths, and uneducated people often learn too much from life. Maybe you have that simple grandmother who knows how to do many things... Be aware that you will be an eternal apprentice, carrying your own truth without needing to harm others.

The second way is to get involved with people in a joyful way, to celebrate life and have fun with all the material world. Life is abundant and has a lot to offer you, you can learn not only in studies, but also at parties and conversations.

The last one is already the most complicated, as it talks about being able to maintain a balance between social life and solitary life. You are very prone to work which the law (judges, lawyers), professions that require a lot of studying to achieve, that suffer their own dangers and pleasures. You can follow this path, but you can't get lost in it and become dogmatic.

All options talk about people, you you can learn from people, how you can you protect them when necessary. Don't be afraid of society, you will see that there are many more good people than bad ones, it's just that the bad ones are louder.

#pick a card #pick a pile #pac #tarot reading #oracle reading #astroblr #witchblr #intuitive reading #tarot community #divination #astrojulia

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emberfrostlovesloki · 6 months

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Freud Said We Should Fuck [Hotch x Reader]

Photo credits: Left and Right (@shakespearesdaughters) Center (@hotchs-big-hands)

Prompt: When Aaron makes a Freudian slip on the jet, he and the reader get flushed, and later, once the case is finished, the reader finds him in his office on a lonely Saturday and teases him about it. Aka, when the reader and Hotch do something in his office other than paperwork.

Pairing: Aaron x fem BAU-reader. The reader uses she/her pronouns

Category: Fluff/angst/smut

Word Count: 9.9K

A/N: Hi loves! First off, this story is 18+, minors DNI. Please respect this boundary. I’m finally back writing again and I’m so happy about it. However, I feel like it’s going to take me a bit to get back into the swing of things. I had a lot of my AU written and then I just thought it was moving too slow. So I’ve put that on hold for a bit and gone back to what I love smut. I don’t think the sex here is the best I’ve ever written, but I still like it. This idea came about because @silk-spun and I were chatting about Aaron and office sex and I couldn’t stop thinking about it - so naturally I wrote it. Please have a look at the notes before reading as there are some things that some plot points that some readers might want to avoid. I hope you like this and if you do, likes, comments, and replies are appreciated! Content Warnings under the cut. I hope you are having a good week. Love Levi - ❤️

Content Warnings: There are two unsubs mentioned in this fic: The one most talked about is a family annihilator [There are mentions of wives and children being killed, depiction of dead bodies, description of a bloody room, mention of suicide via gun (unsub)] The second unsub kills at random [There are mentions of poisoning, falling to one’s death and drowning (the body is briefly described)] Mention of past trauma and abuse [Hotch] and the mention of an absent father. There is also sex: touching over the clothes, sex in a semi-public setting [Hotch’s office] fellatio, p in v (unprotected] Very slight dom vibes from the reader and Hotch and the slightest mention of a size kink. If I missed any, please let me know.

List with all stories

_y/n_ = your name

_c/t_ = coffee or tea (whichever you prefer)

_u/sf/d_ = up/straight forward/down (depending on height).

_s/l_ = short or long

_kl/s/m_ = knee length/short/mini (pick your favorite skirt length)

_y/f/c/s_ = your favorite color and style (bra)

_y/f/t/f_= your favorite type of food

The team sat in the jet as they moved toward Evansville Indiana. The skilled agents were bantering ideas off of each other, as they normally did. This unsub was very blatant with their modus operandi. As Aaron had debriefed in the conference room an hour earlier with the team and Garcia, he said, “The unsub we’re dealing with allegedly has three distinct personalities. Although I would be hesitant to diagnose anyone with a split personality disorder or DID. Many people with this condition are stigmatized due to the negative stereotypes associated with that name. If our unsub does have this condition, then we work from there. But with what we know now, this might just be a part of the ritual and pattern. The police are adamant that it’s a suspect from a mental hospital, but be wary of this. J.J. I want you to cut this off at the bud as soon as we get to the station. The media liaison nodded and replied, “You got it Hotch. I’ll clear that up and make sure they haven’t come up with any nicknames either. That always gets the press in a stir.” Aaron nodded. There wasn’t time for that kind of coverage right now. The team needed to jump in immediately once they touched down. This unsub had a swift turnaround time, killing in heinous and various ways almost every other night. His signature was that at the body of each victim, the unsub left a note from either the Id, the Ego, or the Superego, and by how killing his victims, the unsub had ‘cured them,’ and how the cure had worked. The killer's notes were reminiscent of Freud’s case notes, detailed and a bit deranged. The methods of death had been drowning, poisoning, being drowned, and most recently a fatal fall from a high cliff on a popular walking trail. _y/n_ had cringed at the sight of the drowned victim’s bloated body. It was blue and purple from its extended time in the water. The poisoned victim didn’t look any better. As was usual with BAU cases, the victims had suffered significantly before their deaths. _y/n_ had asked the group as a whole once the note element came out, “Is this guy serious? I mean, Freud is more infamous than famous at this point. His clients were all wealthy Swiss members of society, and he was ridiculed later in life for changing his theories all the time. I mean, how many Fruedians are still honestly out there?” Spencer happily replied, “In terms of clinical, licensed therapists? I’d say very few. Probably around 0.5 percent at this point. But that doesn’t mean that psychoanalysis isn’t still used in a good deal of therapeutic systems. I mean ‘Talk Therapy’ is the norm in most EBT therapy systems. So although Freud and Heidegger might have faded to obscurity, their theories remain.” Hotch had nodded and said stoically, “Wheels up in thirty. We can continue this discussion on the plane. If the unsub sticks to his pattern. They might have a new victim already.”

Thus the team, plus Penelope were on the plane like normal. Once the jet hit cruising altitude, the team seemed to relax a bit They all fell into their usual clusters, and Hotch observed them. _y/n_, Rossi, and Spencer were continuing the psychological aspect of the case with _y/n_, while Em, Derek, and Garcia talked about the victimology and methods of the murders. Lastly, JJ was writing up a short press brief for the police and the public. Aaron knew we could never be thankful enough for the work that JJ did for the team. She covered their backs more than he could ever imagine. It was hard enough doing the job they did, but having JJ backing them up meant they weren’t smeared in the press even more. Hotch made his way to her. He sat on the seat next to hers and looked over her work. The blond woman handed him a notebook page with her statement from the police force. She said, “This is what I’ve got so far. If you have any more legal or profiler things you’d like me to add, just note them in the margins.” The woman handed him a blue ballpoint pen, and Hotch did his best to look carefully and thoroughly over the short blurb. He added a few police procedural things, but otherwise, it looked good. Aaron pushed the paper back on the small table and said, “Looks good J. I just added a few notes. Let me know when you have the one for the public done, and look it over too.” JJ looked up at him as he stood and said, “You got it Hotch. And I’ll make those corrections after I’m done with this.” Aaron then moved to Em, Morgan, and Garcia. They were looking at a map both on the seat and on Penelope's computer. Derek and Em were pinpointing the sites of the victim's body on the physical map while Garcia did the same on her laptop. The trio was trying to make a geographic profile and also see if the sites were linked to a road, river, or some natural feature. All three victims had been found in parks or locations adjacent to parks. As Hotch looked over the map, Emily said, “Given the natural locations of the dump sites and how well-versed the unsub seems to be with local and national parks in the area, this person may be a game warden or resource officer or something like that. Those positions are often isolating and not well-paid. Maybe the unsub has emotions tied to their work. That they’re not achieving enough, or making enough of an impact?” Hotch nodded at the logic of her statement and said to Garcia, “Once you’ve done that work, Garcia, look up the databases for Park Service workers and Game Wardens and make a preliminary risk. Target those who work in the parks where the victims were found and those that have been having problems at work or have had problems at work in the last two months.” Garcia loved getting directions from Aaron. She always thought that his brain was close to hers, except that he was just the quiet version of her. She smiled and said, “Aye, aye captain. Coming right up.” Aaron gave Garcia a small smile and said, “Thanks Penelope.”

Aaron got up again. Before he moved to the last group, he was going to get a cup of coffee for himself _c/t_ for _y/n_. It was their ritual on the plane now. When they were in the office, _y/n_ got him coffee from the breakroom, and when they were on the jet, he got her drink. Aaron’s and _y/n_ relationship had moved from a strong friendship to a light romance, to, in the last six months, a much more heated and sexual affair. Of course, neither of them could say, and much less do anything while they were at work but show small gestures of affection for the other. Aaron and _y/n_ were both professional and could easily keep their relationship work-coded. That didn’t however, mean that Hotch didn’t think about the things they did off the clock. The sound of _y/n_’s bright laugh had his mind reeling back to last weekend. It had been a lazy Saturday morning at his place. She had mentioned getting a snack from the coffee shop down the street before going on a walk in the park or going to get a new book for Jack, who was currently at Haley’s. Aaron had sleepily said something like, “I think you’re enough of a snack as it is, _y/n_” as he rolled onto his back.

There was a moment of silence before _y/n_ started softly laughing. Hotch moved his eyes to her. He expected her to stop laughing after a minute, but his gaze only had her laughing more loudly. She was nearly in stitches as her mirth overflowed. Hotch, not quite sure what had caused her to be so joyful, poked her side and said, “Alright, I give up. What’s so funny? Is my breath bad or something?” Even as Hotch asked, he couldn’t stop himself from starting to laugh too. This was something unique with _y/n_. She allowed him to open up emotionally in ways that he rarely even had. After _y/n_ had caught her breath she said, “Is that your attempt at dirty talk Hotch? If so you need to take a course.” Aaron scoffed at that and said teasingly, “I’ll make you eat those words _y/n_.” As he finished that sentence, he leaned over her and kissed her. He started lightly but became more intense as _y/n_ ran her tongue over his bottom lip. Soon enough, he was undoing the buttons of her night shift and moving his mouth lazily downward with _y/n_ saying his name breathily every time he nipped her skin lightly with his mouth. His breath was hot on the cool expanse of her body. Aaron realized as he started to make the encounter more intimate and relished in how her body responded to his.

Hotch knew that apart from being with _y/n_, he was about as closed off as human could be, and he knew it. His past as a child had inherently shown him that weakness meant pain and suffering and as hard as he had tried to grow out of that, he still had some of those mental barriers up, and they often rose when he was in situations that dealt with lots of emotions. Often he found himself unable to reciprocate. That was part of the reason that he assumed that he was so good at being a prosecutor and a profiler. People’s emotions, whether they be the unsub’s or the victim’s didn’t cause him to bluster, or lose sight of the bigger picture. He was sympathetic to the victims and listened to them with sincerity, but their pain often didn’t affect him the way it did _y/n_. This was the reason that after he spoke to the various victims, he would direct them over to _y/n_ to talk further. So they could cry unabashedly and have someone to hold them tight as they did so. Often Aaron would catch her eyes as they made the silent trade-off. There was always a silent conversation that happened in these looks. It was Aaron saying, ‘Thank you,’ and _y/n_ responded, ‘I got you.’ With time Aaron had slowly started dropping those barriers with _y/n_. She made him feel more human. More intact with his emotions such as joy and the ability to do the unexpected. Things and emotions which he had hidden inside himself a long time ago. The first time that Aaron had been very open to _y/n_ was the first time that he realized that he might have deeper feelings for _y/n_ than respect or camaraderie.

It had been a difficult case. One of the worst. The unsub had been a family annihilator. The man, Mr. Platheville, was targeting young families with only one child. The madman had killed two mothers and their children leaving the fathers to watch in horror and live with the site of the massacre they had witnessed. The first man they had found was shell-shocked and unable to move. An ambulance and mental health experts had been called for him. The next man had been so angry that Hotch and Derek had to hold the man back from hitting and punching himself or the wall or anyone within striking distance. _y/n_ had watched on with apprehension, trying to calm the man down with her words. Although those two cases had been horrible, it was nothing compared to the last. The unsub had called and said where he was and that he had another family hostage. There were audible screams on the other side of the phone. Mr. Plathville had said, “Come quickly. Please. I can’t stop myself anymore.” At first, the team felt like this was a good step. A great step even. The man was giving himself up and asking for help. However, as the tapped line was about to be disconnected, a child’s voice cut in. It sounded scared and small as it said, “Daddy? What’s wrong with Mommy?” That had the whole team freeze. The realization that Plathville had his own family captive now had the team feel like the floor was dropping out from under them -- everyone’s stomach sinking into knots. Hotch dropped the phone first and softly said, “Everyone, move, now.” After a second, he found his voice and said loudly, authoritatively, “Move. Now.” Aaron started running to the van, and he watched as his team followed him to both his car and the other SUV. _y/n_ and Rossi piled into Hotch’s car and hurriedly buckled as Hotch hit the gas pedal. The rubber tires squealed and burned on the concrete. _y/n_ had snatched the passenger seat in the front. Hotch’s jaw was set in a tight grimace as he sped down the road. His driving was close to erratic. It wasn’t something _y/n_ had seen in him before. _y/n_’s eyes found Rossi’s in the review mirror. The older man also looked a bit concerned as well. Gently, _y/n_ placed a hand on Aaron’s upper arm. She could feel the muscle tight under his sleeve as his hands gripped the wheel. At her touch, Hotch’s eyes briefly left the road and met hers. Whatever expression she had on her face was enough to slow his driving speed. For him to pay closer attention to the road.

Hotch was making her nervous. He didn’t seem like himself, but she didn’t say anything. There would be time for that later. The vans came to a raging halt outside the address that Plathville had disclosed. The house seemed quiet. Eerily so. Derek and Hotch approached the door softly. Derek breached the door and the team rushed inside. The front foyer was dark and there was no sound reverberating around the open area. The team fanned out in the ranch-style house. Derek and Spencer moved to the left side of the house toward the kitchen and guest bedroom. Rossi and Emily took the upstairs, and Hotch and _y/n_ moved left toward the living room and master bedroom. The other families had been found in the living room, and _y/n_ braced herself for a similar scene. Hotch’s shoulders tensed as he moved into the entryway of the living room. It meant that this family was already dead too. _y/n_ felt a part of her break inside, but she pulled the pieces back together for the team. For those who had passed. Both agents stepped into the room. The fact that the walls, carpet, and sofa were cream-colored only highlighted the dark splatters marring the walls, couch, and carpet which was soaked with a dark stain. _y/n_ pointed to the light switch and mouthed, “Should I turn it on?” Hotch nodded his head no and inclined this head toward the bedroom door, indicating that Mr. Plathville might still be in the bedroom. It was the only space they hadn’t breached. If Plathville was still in the house either alive or dead, it was in that room. As the calls of Spencer and Emily echoed through the house stating, “Clear,” a small sound came from behind the closed door. Both agents' eyes snapped to the door, and they moved forward. Once they got to the door. Aaron held out a hand to stop her. He shook his head no. He leaned forward and whispered, “Go look at the bodies. And then stop the rest of the team from entering the living room.” _y/n_ met his dark eyes. They seemed to go on forever. He had the look he had before when the child had spoken on the phone. The same look he had had in the car. _y/n_ desperately wanted to know what was going on in his head, but again, now wasn’t the time. _y/n_ nodded and moved back from the door. She moved to the two bodies on the floor but continued to watch as Aaron opened the door, stepped inside, and said, “Mr. Plathville. Don’t do this. Do you think this is the ending your wife and daughter would have wanted for you?” Hotch closed the door behind him, leaving the room in semi-darkness. Hotch could hear soft movement from the other side of the door. It was _y/n_ and it sounded like she was crying. Aaron pushed aside the soft sounds and focused only on Plathville. The cold metal weapon the unsub was holding in his dominant hand wasn’t pointed in any direction, but it could be in an instant. Hotch didn’t want _y/n_ in the room. Because Aaron knew family annihilators, he knew them because he lived with one of them as a child. As an adult, once he learned the proper terms for killers and sadists, he realized that if he hadn’t taken the brunt of what his father doled out, his own father might have been a Plathville as well. Aaron didn’t want _y/n_ to see what might happen. He didn’t want her to see this. Hotch put up his hands and said, “Put down the gun Mr. Plathville. You’ve been a coward with how you’ve treated others because they didn’t do what you liked. Don’t be a coward now, at the end. Face what you’ve done and prove that you’re actually a man.”

The unsub, eyes dark and glazed looked like he was about to set the gun on the bed. Aaron hoped that was what he was doing, but he didn’t trust the man either. Just as the gun seemed to be safe, Plathville turned the weapon on himself. Outside the closed door, _y/n_ heard a very loud bang. A deafening sound. At this point, _y/n was standing by the hallway with Derek. Em, and Rossi. She was doing her best to keep the three other agents at bay. When the BAU team heard the gunshot, they all rushed back into the room. Derek drew his sidearm as they all did and breached the door. _y/n_’s heart pounded in her chest because she had left him alone. Alone with an unsub who they knew had a gun; and if Aaron was dead, she would never be able to forgive herself. Not for all time. As the team rushed into the room. Hotch’s strong profile stood out against the window. His nose and jawline were distinct against the streetlight that seeped light into the room through the casement window. Aaron seemed frozen on the spot and the still and bloodied body of Mr. Plathville was slumped on the bed. _y/n_ moved forward and avoided her gaze from the new body. She took Aaron’s arm and pulled him out of the room. Not just the room but the house as well. She sensed that he needed the space away from the darkness emanating from the home. The graveyard.

When they were at the side of the house opposite the bedroom, _y/n_ stopped. She looked down at his shoes, they had blood splatters on the toe. She looked _u/sf/d_ at him. His face was also splattered with blood. _y/n_ reached over, pulling the cuff of her white sleeve over her palm; she started wiping away the viscous red fluid from his sharp facial features. _y/n_ reflected for a moment on how attractive Aaron really was, with his stoicism and strong jaw, and how terrible a time it was for such thoughts to surface. _y/n_ pushed them away as Hotch seemed to come to himself, as she moved her hand to the other side of his face. The blood smears here were larger. There was other matter that _y/n_ would rather not speculate on. Aaron’s left hand raised and pushed her own dirtied sleeve away from his face. Hotch seemed to take a small breath, and he looked like a child who had been caught doing something wrong. _y/n_ wondered if it was his showing emotion out in the open that he perceived as being bad. She looked back at him before he seemingly crumpled into _y/n_’s arms. Low sobs reverberated on her shoulder. Tears staining _y/n_’s already soiled shirt. _y/n_ was grateful the police cruisers were on the other side of the house. Parked on the gravel drive. _y/n_knew that they would have to move soon or else the team would come looking for them. She was sure Hotch would not want to be found in such a compromised state.

_y/n_ didn’t know what else to say than, “I’m sorry Hotch. I know it’s sick and fucked up, but at least there’s no one else he can hurt. Not even himself.” And it was true. It burned _y/n_ that Mr. Plathville would face no consequences for his crimes of passion, but when an unsub took the end into their own hands, there was a certain finality to the matter. There would be fewer interviews and less press. There wouldn’t be a trial or the need for written testimony from everyone involved. It felt like a twisted prize for a game no one had asked to play. After a moment, Aaron replied softly, “It’s not that. Or it is that and some other stuff. I don’t know why I’m like this. I’m sorry.” _y/n_ frowned and pulled away a bit. Hotch looked at her with eyes asking, begging for her to stay. She took his right hand which was hanging limply at his side and said, “Let’s just walk down the drive and back. It will give you a moment to compose yourself. Get your thoughts in order. “Aaron seemed to hesitate and said, “But the police… the team, they might.” _y/n_ cut him off gently saying, “They can wait. The cops have plenty of people to interview and material to bag and tag. They can wait while we take a five-minute walk.

_y/n_ found that walking got people talking. Particularly if the people were not wanting to open up. The movement and change of scenery seemed to give whomever she was walking with a breather and a chance to let out some thoughts if they wanted. If they didn’t, then at least they’d both gotten some fresh air. This technique had worked with Morgan, JJ, and Em. I had not worked with Spencer, but Spencer spoke so freely all the time that if he had something he didn’t want to share, then he didn’t want to share, and she understood that. This was the first time she was trying this method on Aaron. As they made it halfway up the drive, and not so much to her shock, Hotch let out a sigh and said, “It was Jack’s birthday yesterday…” _y/n_ looked over to him briefly. His eyes were on the ground, Glued to it. She knew that wasn’t the whole issue, but _y/n_ replied, “I’m sorry you had to miss that for this mess.”

They kept walking. and Aaron let out another breath and continued, “When I see people like Plathville, I see my father. I see a bit of myself in him as well.” _y/n_ furrowed her brow and turned to look at him, walking backward, matching his pace. She didn’t know a lot about Hotch’s father apart from the fact that he was dead and had hurt Aaron very badly. Perhaps she could see a correlation there between the unsub and Hotchner Sr., but she couldn’t see how Hotch was at all like either man. She asked for clarity saying, “What do you mean? I don’t see how you’re like either of those monsters. You’re tied to your father by blood, but he’s gone.” Aaron looked at her and then back down the dark path they were on. A lone streetlamp shone at the end of the road. They reached it and turned back before Aaron said, “It’s a pattern. They were both absent fathers. They both lashed out at things and people. And look at me. I hardly see Jack. It feels like once in a blue moon. And I might not be lashing out at people because my job takes out that stress. But look at me in the office, I’m still anal about things. I just see these patterns. I don’t want to fail as a father, and I feel like I am.” And there it was. There was the crux of his emotions and _y/n_ ached for his pain, for his fear, even if it seemed unfounded to her. It certainly wasn’t unfounded to him, and she’d never say that. As they moved back toward the house. _y/n_ was wording and rewording her response again and again in her head; she couldn’t quite seem to come up with the perfect response. It all sounded too close to “I love you and other people love you too, can’t you see that?” She felt the hairs picked up on the back of her neck and she looked over to Aaron. He was staring at her, Asking for some kind of reply. They were near the house again and she stopped, and he stopped too. Now _y/n_ gave a sigh, her breath making a little cloud in front of her face. She finally replied, “Aaron, I don’t know what this is going to sound like to you, but here it is. I think you’re tired. I haven’t seen you sleep in three days straight because this case is so close to you. It’s close because it involves a group of people who can’t protect themselves, or their children. And I think in some ways after Haley filed, you think that you can’t protect her or Jack either. But Aaron, you’ve handled everything there with as much grace and compassion as you could. You did what Haley wanted and you still try and look after them. And maybe you don’t see Jack as often as you like, but you try. I hear you call him at night when the team’s away. And the stories you tell about when he spends the weekends over make it sound like you don’t just shower him with gifts or love bomb him. You’re trying to have a relationship with him. And I never hear you badmouth Haley, ever, which means your son can know that not all relationships work out but there can still be a kind of love and respect. A lot of kids don’t get that.” _y/n_ took a breath and she saw in his eyes that he was coming more to himself, as she finished stating, “And about you being like your father, yeah, genes are passed down, but I don’t believe that people are born bad. I think something bad happens to them and you either continue the cycle or break it. And you’re far too kind of a person, even if you don’t show it, to keep doing what you’re father did. You’d never do those things to another person. You’re not him Hotch. You never will be.”

_y/n_ looked at him to see what his reaction to her words would be. Aaron looked like he might cry again, but was holding back those emotions. She hoped she hadn’t overstepped some emotional or professional line, but she didn’t have time to ask as Hotch stepped forward and wrapped her in a hug. His warm body enveloped her in the cold night. His breath fanned the _s/l_ hair at the nape of her neck. He whispered, “Thank you for that, _y/n_. I needed to hear that.” When Aaron pulled back, he was himself again. He nodded and motioned his head toward the house. As he attempted to move forward, _y/n_ grabbed his coat sleeve, and he looked at her confused. _y/n_ said, “Wipe the left side of your face Hotch. It’s still bloody.” Aaron rolled his eyes and chuckled softly. They both started walking back to the house, and he wiped off his face. As they walked back, there was an understanding that something deeper had happened between them. As Aaron moved past the cruisers with red and blue lights still flashing, he raised the caution tape for _y/n_, and as she stepped under it. Aaron looked at her and felt a warmth seep through him. It bit through the cold outside, and he didn’t mind it.

Aaron pulled his mind out of the haze that was focused on the sounds that _y/n_ had made last Saturday morning. Her moans and whimpers rang in his ears for a second longer. He was thankfully snapped back to the interior of the jet as a bit of turbulence rocked the aircraft. Aaron cleared his throat and moved to the coffee maker. He made himself a cup of black coffee first. He shot a prayer up to any possible deity up there that his body and mind had not synced enough for him to be aroused by his mind's inappropriate wandering. Having to hide an erection wasn’t his idea of a fun time. It had happened once or twice before and he had to rush to the bathroom and splash cold water on his face and neck. When Hotch’s cup was done, he moved another clean styrofoam cup under the dispenser and started making _y/n_’s _t/c_. He stifled a yawn. He had spent much of the last two days working on field reports and revising the FBI’s security training. It was woefully behind the times. He had coordinated with Penelope and as helpful as Garcia was in terms of the technological aspects of cyber security, the lingo and Pen’s energy had worn him out a bit. The Keurig beeped, indicating _y/n_’s drink was done. He doctored the beverage as she liked. Aaron half blamed his wandering mind on his lack of sleep and the case. Spencer’s clear voice cut through all the others and he was talking about the more interesting sexual elements of Freud’s theories including the more lurid Oedipus and Xena complexes. Reid was going on about how the notes from the unsub seemed to really dive into those theories even though there was no sexual aspect to the case yet. Hotch grabbed _y/n_’s cup and moved back to the final group he had not spoken with yet.

He sat next to _y/n_ and handed her her cup. _y/n_ looked at Hotch and gave him a small smile before taking a sip of her drink. _y/n_ had a random thought, as she mulled over the bizarre nature of the case. She said aloud, “What do you think Freud would think about people using his theories like this? I mean he was odd and problematic, but not that odd.” Aaron had his eyes closed, and he replied without even thinking said, “I think Freud would say we should fuck.” _y/n_ nearly spat out her drink. The liquid burned her throat as it went down. Hotch caught his mistake and flushed, quickly amending his statement saying, “I mean if Freud were still here, he would probably think the unsub would want to have intercourse with his victims. It could either be latent sexual attraction or transference of sexual desire for an authority figure like a parent or teacher. An attraction that shouldn’t be acted out.” Hotch could feel his ears burning, and he hid his face by taking a long drink of his coffee. The dark liquid burned his mouth but this pain was better than having to face to look of utter shock of his friends. Thankfully the awkwardness only lasted a second longer as Spencer picked up on his hurried line of thinking saying, “You could be right. This unsub might be impotent and killing as a means of sexual release. Or they could be killing as a displacement tactic for unwanted feelings.” Reid jumped into that conversation with a fervor and _y/n_ added her thoughts in too along with taking some notes on the comments Spence made.

Although Spencer didn’t choose to comment on what Hotch had said, when the Unit Chief looked over at Rossi, his friend had an eyebrow raised and an expression that said, “Really, Aaron?” Hotch closed his eyes, sighed, and rubbed a hand over his eyelids as if saying, “I’m tired. Alright?” When Aaron opened his eyes again, Rossi just gave a little shrug as if saying, “Hey. I have three ex-wives. I’m not one to judge.” The older man ever so slightly looked over to _y/n_ and gave a small smile. The team knew that Hotch was seeing _y/n_. They were all too perceptive not to tell. But what he had just said was more personal than the team needed to know. At least not yet. Aaron liked keeping his private life private, and he would have to apologize to _y/n_ for putting their personal business out there like that. He was just thankful that he had made that slip of the tongue in front of Spencer and Dave and not Morgan and Garcia. There would be no end to the gossip if that had been the case. Aaron sat back in his seat and did his best to put back on the Unit Chief facade. One great thing was that he was able to compartmentalize his emotions and what had just happened was just a blunder. He fell easily back into the conversation and made himself useful to the team.

The case was a wild one with the team being kept on their feet, as the unsub devolved into crazier and more complex kills. Thankfully the unsub, one Kathy Kittery got sloppy as her mind crumbled under the weight of her own brain. Thus, only one other victim was lost, the others, though traumatized would make it through the ordeal. Ms. Kittery was a therapist who had had her license revoked after having an affair with a client. Once she had taken that blow, she had moved to a second career that had always interested her. Being a Ranger in a State Park. However, as it turned out, the mental isolation did not help with her already troubled state and she had slipped into acting on her delusions, thus the need for the team to come in the first place. After the unsub had been arrested, the team, as normal, was assured that she wouldn’t be seeing freedom for a good long while. On the jet home, Aaron’s sexual comment was almost forgotten by everyone, including himself, but _y/n_ remembered and as she closed her eyes to sleep on the short flight back, her brain played out certain scenarios that she also wouldn’t want to be voiced in front of the others. When the jet touched down, the team disembarked and _y/n_ asked Aaron as they walked back to the main office, “So, what are you doing tomorrow?” Tomorrow was Saturday and she hoped that they could spend the day together or with Jack if he was staying over at Hotch’s that weekend. It felt like a while since they had had a good day to themselves. Work had piled up, and she longed for just a few solid hours with Aaron. Hotch, however, didn’t seem to pick up on her tone as he was tired. He replied in a monotone, “Probably filling out paperwork in the office I’m behind on like three cases worth and this makes a fourth.” _y/n_ pouted slightly. She knew she was being silly, but sometimes Aaron needed a break for his own good, and an idea started brewing in the back of her mind. If she had the nerve to do even half of what her head was cooking up, she would have done something she had been imagining for a long time. Longer than was appropriate probably. For the moment she just said, “Mhm. Sounds productive.” Hotch scoffed as they both entered the sliding glass door. Even he knew his life, and particularly weekends sounded miserable sometimes. After all, he was the one that put him through them.

The next afternoon, _y/n_ pulled up to the Quantico field office. She parked her car next to Aaron’s and set her employee parking pass on the dash so it could be seen by security. _y/n_ chuckled remembering the one time that Derek had forgotten his pass and had his Corvette towed on a Saturday. Her athletic friend had been so flustered, saying, “Oh come on! I work at the freaking FBI you’d think there would be some camera’s in this lot and they’d know I work here!” _y/n_ had laughed, patted his shoulder, and offered him a ride to the impound lot to pick up his flashy car. As _y/n_ moved through the mostly empty lot she smiled. Not that she expected there to be a lot of people at the office on a Saturday afternoon, but it boded well for what she had in mind. As entered the office and was waived through security quickly, she hadn’t brought her gun or anything important with her. She entered the bullpen and looked up at Hotch’s office. His lights were on and she could see him looking at something on his desk. It was most likely a field report. The bullpen was empty and most of the lamps on the desks were off. One or two burned brightly in the soft space. One or two of the agents must have forgotten to turn them off in the rush to get home on Friday. She turned off the lamps as she texted Aaron, “Hey, you at the office?” She looked up at his office window and his head turned to the side. Clearly, he had just received her message. His left hand raised and a second later her phone beeped. Hotch had sent back a simple “Yes.” He was never one to be overly elaborate over text. If he was forced to type more than one full paragraph he would just give up and call instead. _y/n_ always chalked it up to his hands being too big for the small phone screen. He probably made a lot of accidental typos with his thumbs and had to go back and correct them which seemed like a thing that would annoy him to no end, even if he did have autocorrect on his phone. _y/n_ took a breath as she looked at Aaron again. He was back to his paper. _y/n_ had jokingly said she would do this if the spirit led her, but somehow seemed like the dirty things she was picturing in her head were driving her up the stairs and not ‘the spirit.’ Outside Hotch’s door, she knocked once and then turned the knob. She stepped into the dimly lit room and closed the door behind her. She softly said, “Hey Hotch, how are the papers going?” Aaron looked up from his desk. He did a bit of a double take as his eyes flicked to his phone and then back to her. His eyes held a hint of surprise, warmth, and general confusion as he said, “_y/n_. What are you doing here? Do you need something?” _y/n_ couldn’t help but flush already. Hotch was just too cute sometimes; especially when he wasn’t trying.

_y/n_ smiled at him and took a seat across from him at his desk. _y/n_ sighed and said, “I was just bored I guess. I had nothing better to do, so why not give you a hand with your paperwork? Maybe I can get you out of here earlier than five p.m. on a Saturday?” Aaron raised a brow. He highly doubted that that was _y/n_’s only reason for being here, but he wouldn’t question her. Instead, he picked up a case file, and set it in front of her saying, “Suit yourself, love.” _y/n_ flushed again and pulled one of Aaron’s ballpoint pens out of the cup he kept a stash in. _y/n_ wondered how many pens he dried up per year, but wasn’t in the mood for calculus problems right now. Instead, she opened the file and started working on the first page. She had to take it for at least ten minutes before she made a move. _y/n_ assumed if she outright said, “Hey wanna have sex in your office there would be two simultaneous outcomes. The first was that she would no longer be Aaron Hotchner’s partner and that she would be a former FBI Behavioral Analyst. Neither of which sounded very appealing. So she took her time.

When Aaron seemed absorbed in his work again, she slipped off her shoe and moved her foot across the space between her side of the desk and his. It was a bit of a reach, but she managed to brush Aaron’s ankle and the inside of his trouser leg. That did it and Aaron’s eyes snapped to hers. They were dark, hiding emotions that he often kept at bay. He cleared his throat and said, “_y/n_, really?” You chuckled and said, “Sorry. I just like to see you flustered.” _y/n_ pulled her leg back and Aaron watched as she flushed but returned to her papers. _y/n_ knew he liked it when she was a tease sometimes and that was her plan for this potentially risky act she was trying to have with Hotch. After another ten minutes, _y/n_ repeated the same action, except this time she moved her foot higher up his leg She applied gentle pressure to the inside of his leg. His grey trousers were cool under her foot as they moved up past the knee and onto his inner thigh. Her dark stockings were the only barrier between her skin and the fabric of his pants. _y/n_ looked up at him and he let out a soft breath as if his brain hadn’t caught up with his body yet. When the two entities of mind of body did collide his brows furrowed trying to reconcile the pleasure coursing through his body and the fact that this shouldn’t be happening in his office.

Before he could make any protestation, _y/n_ cut him off saying, “So, ‘Freud said we should fuck’ did he?” This reminder of his slip of the tongue gagged Aaron momentarily. It gave _y/n_ enough time to shift lower in her chair and slip her foot high enough to press over his crotch. Aaron let out a little grunt at the contact. _y/n_ continued to run her foot over his zipper, up and down in a rhythmic pattern. _y/n_ smiled as his eyes grew hazy with desire. A look she’d seen on him often, just not in his office. Never in his office. But she had dreamed about it plenty. She’d woken soaked on occasions with the notion of Aaron having her in his office, blinds drawn tight as they made love in the enclosed space. Aaron stuttered trying to make a coherent sentence, but his cock slowly hardening in his pants was not helping him at all. _y/n_ could feel it under her foot and continued to tease him saying, “You know you really shouldn’t make comments about our sex lives in front of a team of profilers. I think you owe me an apology?” _y/n_ pulled her foot away and Aaron groaned at the loss of contact, but suddenly his mind was more clear. Half of Aaron’s brain cursed _y/n_ for knowing just the right way to turn him on. The other half was already imagining her splayed out on his desk as he ate her out, or pounded into her so hard that the desk left marks on her hips. Those thoughts alone had his member twitch against his belt and fly. To consumed in his thoughts, Aaron slipped off his own left shoe, and perhaps more gently than _y/n_ had, he moved his foot up her leg and to her cunt. _y/n_ opened her legs for him slightly pushing her _kl/s/m_ length skirt up a bit. Even wearing socks, Aaron could tell that _y/n_ was wet. The moan she made as he just brushed over her sex and him realize that he couldn’t wait. That he needed her, now. Hotch took away his foot and reveled in the needy noise _y/n_ also made at the lack of contact. Hotch moved quickly to his door, locking it from the inside before closing the shades to the office. His movements were hasty, jerky even. _y/n_ watched him, knowing the sexual tension must have built up since the last time they had been intimate.

_y/n_ wasn’t sure what Aaron had in mind but she did have to ask, “There aren’t any hidden cameras in here, right?” Hotch chuckled, the sound was throaty, and he replied, “Not that I know of. And if they are, then at least we’ll both be fired.” _y/n_ laughed at this and took his hand; she led him back to his office chair. _y/n_ appreciated that he had a sense of humor in these moments that were new to him. _y/n_ knew that she pushed him to do things he hadn’t before both in and out of the bedroom, but he never complained and the bulge in his pants told her that he was already looking forward to what she was about to do for him. Aaron looked up at her a bit amazed at the things she could make him do. Never in his life had he thought he would be able to act out his fantasy. _y/n_ leaned down and kissed him softly at first and then with more hunger and ferocity. Aaron reciprocated in turn. As their lips looked in a passionate heated kiss, _y/n_ moved her hands to the belt that kept his trousers in place over his trim hips. It wasn’t as hard as _y/n_ had imagined taking off his belt without looking. The cool metal of the clasp heated against your skin. You moved to his pant’s button and zipper next. _y/n_ didn’t want to wait around anymore and once his grey briefs and thick arousal were freed, _y/n_ started palming his erection with a steady hand. Once her hand started stroking him, Aaron let out a gasp. He opened his mouth enough for her to slip her tongue into his mouth. He breathed in her throat and had her make a small contented noise as she explored the well-known concaves of his mouth. _y/n_ would never consider herself a sex expert, but when it came to new positions or scenarios with intimacy and Hotch, she often found it helpful if she took the lead. Warming him up to the idea. Making him feel comfortable and safe before they kept doing whatever it was they were trying. Oftentimes Aaron would jump on board and take the reigns, which she adored. She loved it when he told her what to do, how to lie. Everything. It was one of Aaron’s most attractive traits.

_y/n_ pulled her mouth away from his and wrapped her hand around his cock, more steadily pumping his length. Aaron said her name as he started moving his hips to meet her pace. His body responded to her touch. _y/n_ smiled at him and moved away for a moment, pushing his chair back enough for her to kneel under his desk. Aaron pushed his hips up and let _y/n_ pull his pants down, exposing his cock to the cold air. Hotch took a few steadying breaths. He knew what was to come, _y/n_ gave some of the best head that he had ever had and the anticipation of her lips on her member had him panting already. He said, “Can you not kneel all the way down like that, love? I want to touch you while you’re dining me?” _y/n_ smiled, relishing the fact that he was already taking a small amount of control of the situation. She nodded and said, “Of course Aaron, anything you ask.” With his request in mind, _y/n_ got up on her knees. It was helpful because she needed the reach to be able to lean over and take his tip in her mouth. She swirled her tongue over the top and slit, sucking at it like some rare candy. Hotch groaned as she moved her head down his length slightly. _y/n_ took in his width and length with surprising ease. He was always surprised by her ability to take him. It only made her more attractive to him. As his head swam with pleasure and endorphins, he moved his own body forward and down a little. His head almost rested on her shoulder as he moved his long arm to feel between her legs and upper thighs. He slid his hand down and over between her skirt. As he started rubbing her clothed sex, _y/n_ moaned over his cock. She took a second before she kept moving her head further down him. Her mouth and tongue doing things to him that almost made him see stars. His left hand kept massaging her wet, clothed folds while his right pushed up her shift and kneaded her breasts in turn over her _y/f/c/a/s_ bra. Aaron could feel her nipples grow rigid under her bra and he moved his hand under the intimate article of clothing that covered her chest. He squeezed her right breast and squeezed her nipple. As _y/n_ started moving her head up and down his whole length, Aaron matched her pace with his hand on her clit, pushing and pulling sensations out of her. It turned out Hotch was so aroused, so excited that he kept moving his hand faster over her sex and clit, and _y/n_ kept up her own pace. Aaron panted and tipped his head back as he released some precome and she moved off him sucking it off of him. As she moved to take him in her mouth again, Aaron stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. _y/n_’s mind and body were also hazy with desire. Her entrance ached to be filled by Hotch more fully. His hand was amazing, but nothing beat him seating himself in her fully and then fucking her to the heavens.

Aaron could see this desire in her. A desire for him alone. Aaron pulled her onto shaky feet. He stood as well. He kissed her again, the beginning of stubble running over her chin and jaw. He pushed his pants and briefs fully off his legs and undid the side zipper of her skirt. He let it fall onto the beige carpet. He pulled back from her mouth and slipped his hands at the elastic of her stockings. He was too impatient to pull them down gingerly. Instead, he used just a bit of his strength to rip them down the center seam. _y/n_ let out an exhalation of breath. She knew it was going to get good now. Not that it hadn’t been good before, but she knew that it could get even better than his thumb and middle finger rubbing against her sex and clit. Aaron looked at her panties and noticed how they matched her bra. He murmured, “You had this all planned, didn’t you, you little devil?” _y/n_ gave him a wink and said, “Maybe just a little. You mad about it?” Hotch let out a little throaty growl and slipped his fingers under the band of her underwear. When they were on the floor, he moved to the desk. He pushed his files to the side along with the batch that _y/n_ had been working so diligently on a few minutes ago. He might desperately want to bend her over his desk, but he wasn’t so stupid to waste three good hours of work by having his files fly all over the place while he fucked _y/n_.

Once the forms were safely on the other side of the desk, Aaron grabbed her hips, turned her body 180 degrees, and then pressed her upper body flush to the hard dark wood of his desk. Hotch had unbuttoned her shirt and her skin felt cool against Hotch’s desk. She anticipated Aaron’s next move as he moved behind her slowly. Hotch pumped his throbbing length once or twice to ready himself. Another bead of precum moved to his tip and he wet his member with it. Even if he was ready and _y/n_ was ready, some of her wetness was even dripping down her thigh, Hotch was going to tease her still, as she had teased him. Aaron moved right next to her and slid his cock up and down her entrance, slightly pressing at the space that was begging for him. Aaron used his left hand to stroke over her weeping sex and _y/n_ moaned saying, “A-aron. Please. Please fuck me. Oh god.” Aaron looked at his length now coated in his and _y/n_’s excitement. It didn’t take more than her words for him to press himself into her fully with a measured thrust. _y/n_ let her out a breath and Hotch could feel her body press into the side of the desk. Aaron pulled out and pressed in again. _y/n_ let out a whimper and there was a slight squelching sound and he began to move in and out of her more quickly. Aaron's thick cock filled her fully and Hotch watched as he pushed in and out of her building his speed. The veins of his length ribbed her insides and _y/n_ almost let her feet go from under her, the desk and Aaron holding up her weight as he kept pressing into her with a relentless pace. _y/n_ could feel him fill her fully, pressing his whole member deep inside her. Aaron knew just how to move his hips to hit her sweet spot and she was panting and babbling in under a minute. Aaron moved one hand to her mouth whispering, “Shhh, now. We wouldn’t want to get caught, now would we?” _y/n_ wanted to protest and say, ‘You know no one is out there, Hotch,’ but her head was so full of lust, desire, and longing to let go. Aaron’s movements had her desire building and she knew Aaron could feel it too. Hotch picked up the pace, rapidly thrusting into her. He moved his left hand to her clit and let go of her mouth so she could let out a litany of sounds. As he kept his fast pace and circled her clit, her body pushed roughly against his desk with every thrust, she whimpered, “I...I’m gonna come, Aaron.” Hotch smiled and leaned down so his chest was flush with her back. His hand on her outer erogenous zone moved quickly and _y/n_’s walls fluttered and then contracted against his cock. _y/n_ cried out and let go of everything, letting the pure bliss of her orgasm overcome her. The sounds of her release had Aaron climax as well. He groaned as he pushed into her a few more times as he let his spent his ejaculation into her. Their shared sounds of pleasure filled the room and Aaron considered how this was better than he could have ever imagined. _y/n_ though spent, felt the same way.

Hotch took a moment to catch his breath and after a minute he let out a contented sigh. He pulled out of _y/n_ gently. As _y/n_ similarly let out a hum of happiness. She loved the way he was so gentle with her at the end of their intimate encounters. Aaron helped her stand and led her to the couch at the side of the room. Neither exactly felt like saying anything in the soft afterglow of their shared experience. Aaron had her sit on the couch and pulled moved back to his desk. He opened the left drawer and pulled out a pocket square that he rarely wore. He found the linen handkerchiefs too formal and stuffy. And as someone who came off as formal and stuffy already, he didn’t need a fashion accessory to add to the impression. But now, the fabric would come in handy. Aaron walked back to the couch with the confidence of a man who had performed very well. _y/n_ would have laughed at his cockiness if he wasn’t so damn good at sex. The first they had done it, she was so tight that it would have hurt if he hadn’t helped prep her very well. Now he fit her perfectly and he knew it.

She smiled lazily at him as he knelt down and gently cleaned her up. He loved her, but if his or her release started staging his furniture, it might lead to awkward conversations later. When he was done cleaning her body, he wiped himself. He raised his head and said, “Was that everything you wanted darling? You did very well by the way. You felt so good for me. I hope I was the same for you?” _y/n_ beamed and said, “It was everything I wanted and more. Thanks for indulging me. Aar. But I do think you should get out of this office. Being cramped up in here isn’t good for you mentally, sexually, or physically. So what do you say we get out of here and get an early dinner and watch a Christmas movie at my place, huh?” Aaron chuckled and folded the soiled handkerchief to the clean side facing out. He put it in his pocket and smoothed down his now very crumpled shirt. He grabbed his pants and underwear along with _y/n_’s skirt and panties. He tossed them over to her and they both changed. As Aaron zipped up his pants, he said, “Sounds like I good plan. These papers can wait till Monday morning.” Somehow _y/n_ always seemed to know what he needed, and he wasn’t going to fight her on it now. Not after what they’d just done. As _y/n_ put her clothes back on, he paced his briefcase and packed _y/n_’s ripped tights inside with his other work. He wouldn’t just throw those away in the trash by the door. As he did this, _y/n_ moved behind him and gave him a hug saying softly, “You know I really liked those tights, so I expect a replacement stat, mister.” Hotch chuckled and said, “You got it, _y/n_, but you know I couldn’t help myself. Not when you tease me like that.” There was a shared laughter as Aaron turned off his lamp, grabbed his and _y/n_’s bag, and opened the door for both of them. He locked the door to his office behind him and trailed _y/n_. He had suddenly grown an appetite and asked, “So, what type of food are you feeling.” _y/n_ thought about it as they descended the stairs. She took his hand and said, “How about _y/f/t/f_?” Aaron smiled and said, “Sounds great!” _y/n_ rested her head against Aaorn’s shoulder and contemplated how lucky she was for him, and for Freudian slips.

______________________________________________________________

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sasaranurude · 2 months

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Okay. I've been playing Tokyo Debunker today, since the release happened to catch me on a day when all I'd planned to do was write fanfiction. I just finished reading the game story prologue (it was longer than expected!), so here's a review type post. If you're reading this post not having seen a single thing about this game: it's a story-based joseimuke gacha mobile game that just released globally today. It's about a girl who suddenly finds herself attending a magic school and mingling with elite, superhuman students known as ghouls. If you look in the tumblr tag for the game you'll see what appears to be a completely different game from 2019 or so: they retooled it completely midway through development, changing just about everything about it due to "escalating competition within the gaming industry."

I'll talk about how this looks like a blatant twst clone at the end.

Starting with the positive: The story is charming. I enjoyed it thoroughly the entire time and am excited to read more. The mix between visual novel segments and motion comics was really nice--it broke things up and added a lot of oomph to the action or atmospheric scenes that visual novels generally lack. I like the art in the comic parts a lot. the live2d in the visual novel parts is... passable. Tone-wise, I think the story was a little bit all over the place and would like to see more of the horror that it opened on, but I didn't mind the comedic direction it went in either. The translation is completely seamless. The characters so far all have unique voices and are just super fun and cute. Of the ones who've had larger roles in the story so far, there's not a single one I dislike. It's all fully voiced in Japanese and the acting is solid. (I don't recognize any voices, and can't seem to find any seiyuu credits, so it seems they're not big names, but they deliver nonetheless.) Kaito in particular I found I was laughing at his lines a ton, both the voicing and the writing.

He's looking for a girlfriend btw. Spreading the word.

The problem is like. The gameplay is the worst dark-pattern microtransaction-riddled bullshit I've ever seen. Hundred passive timers going at all times. Fifty different item-currencies. Trying to get you to spend absurd amounts of real world money at every turn. There's like five different indicators that take you to various real-money shop items that I don't know how to dismiss the indicator, I guess you just have to spend money, wtaf. Bajillion different interlocking systems mean you have zero sense of relative value of all the different item-currencies. I did over the course of the day get enough diamonds for one ten-pull, which I haven't used yet. Buying enough diamonds for a ten-pull costs a bit under $60 (presumably USD, but there's a chance the interface is automatically making that CAD for me--not gonna spend the money to check lmfao), with an SSR rate of 1%. BULLSHIIIIIT.

There's like a goddamn thousand-word essay explaining the dozen different types of character upgrades and equippables and equippables for the equippables!! Bad! Bad game design! That's just overcomplicating bullshit to trick people into thinking they're doing something other than clicking button to make number go up! That is not gameplay!

In terms of the actual gameplay, there is none. The battle system is full auto. There might be teambuilding, but from what I've seen so far, most of that consists of hoping you pull good cards from gacha and then clicking button to make number go up. There's occasional rhythm segments but there's no original music, it's just remixes of public domain classical music lmao. I'd describe the rhythm gameplay as "at least more engaging than twisted wonderland's," which is not a high bar

At least there's a cat in the rhythm bit.

And like, ok, I gotta remark on how derivative it is. Like I mentioned in my post earlier, this game is unabashedly aping twisted wonderland's setting and aesthetic. (That said, most of the stuff it steals from twst is magic school stuff that twst also basically stole from Harry Potter, so...?) However, it isn't exactly like twst: in this one, the characters say fuck a lot and bleed all over the place and do violence. Basically, the tone is a fair bit more adult than twst's kid-friendly vibe. (Not, like, adult adult, and I probably wouldn't even call it dark--it's still rated Teen lol. Just more adult than twst.)

Rather than just being students at magic school, the ghouls also go out into the mundane world to go on missions where they fight and investigate monsters and cryptids. Honestly, the magic school setting feels pretty tacked-on. The things that are enjoyable about this would've been just as enjoyable in about any other setting--you can tell this whole aspect was a late trend-chasing addition, lmao. So, yeah, it's blatantly copying twst to try to steal some players, but... Eh, I found myself not caring that much. Someone more (or less) into twst than me may find it grating.

Character-wise, eh, sure, yeah, they're a bit derivative in that aspect too, but it's a joseimuke game, the characters are always derivative. Thus far the writing & execution has been solid enough that I didn't care if they were tropey. If I were to compare it to something else, I'd say the relationship between the protagonist and the ghouls feels more like that of the sage and wizards in mahoyaku than anything from twst. There's some mystery in exactly what "ghouls" are and their place in this world that has me intrigued and wanting to know more about this setting and how each of the characters feels about it. I have a bad habit of getting my hopes up for stories that put big ideas on the table and then being disappointed when they don't follow through in a way that lives up to my expectations, though.

So, my final verdict: I kind of just hope someone uploads all the story segments right onto youtube so nobody has to deal with the dogshit predatory game to get the genuinely decent story lol. Give it a play just for the story if you have faith in your ability to resist dark patterns. Avoid at all costs if you know you're vulnerable to gacha, microtransactions, or timesinks.

#suchobabbles #Tokyo Debunker #it's a global simultaneous release so I'm curious to see how it ends up doing in Japan #it's gonna be competing directly with stellarium of the fragile star which releases in a few days lmao. and is about a magic alchemy school #looks like the two games twt accounts have a similar number of followers #and then theyre competing with bremai releasing in may...#also adding this at the very end since i cant confirm anything:#but i found out abt this game bc it was rt'd by the former localization director/translator of A3en #i dont know if she worked on it or maybe her friend or maybe shes just hype! who knows! but i think her word (or rt) is worth something

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felassan · 3 months

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Image credits: David Gaider [source link below]

Article: 'Who is qualified to make a world? In search of the magic of maps'

"You're travelling with your imagination..."

An extensive feature article about maps, map creation and world-building. It refers to David Gaider and the team's early world-building and early-days process of creating the universe that would become Dragon Age. It includes this early series of original sketches of the map of Thedas through time that Gaider drew when the world was being created.

Excerpts under the cut (due to length):

"Dragon Age. That's the game Gaider was working on - or rather, it was the world he would dream up. Ideas had been swirling about what Dragon Age would be for a few months. The team knew it would be like D&D but would not be actual D&D, because BioWare was sick of licensed games at the time. They knew they were going for Tolkien rather than Conan or Diablo. "We definitely had at least some idea of the kind of RPG this was going to be," Gaider tells me when in a video call. But BioWare didn't have a world. One day, Gaider was handed a historical atlas of Europe and tasked with going away and coming up with a fantasy world for players to explore. And almost immediately, he sketched a map." - "What is it about a map that gives it magical powers to bind us and pull us in? I wanted to know more, and through talking to David Gaider and learning about his creation of the map for Dragon Age, I hoped I might find out." - "In fact, he corrects me, "I sketched a lot of maps." But they were the same map, replicated over and over, because in order for a world to make sense to Gaider, it needed history. "I drew this coastline and then made a bunch of photocopies of it," he says, "and did this series of sketches, like, 'Okay in this era, this is where people lived and where they migrated and created different cultures,' and those cultures changed over time as they got conquered. Much like the book of European maps I had, I was doing it in eras and forming an idea in my mind about how these groups all mingled together. David Gaider was kind enough to share his original sketches of the Dragon Age world with me, and in them, you can see an emerging flow of history. You can see the spread of the Tevinter Empire as the race of Men lands in the north and then begins to spread out. You can see, in the earliest images, there's still a kingdom of Elves in the forest of Arlathan, nearby. Then, they are forced out by the growing Tevinter Empire, south to the Dales, where we encounter them in the Dragon Age games, subjugated to being a kind of slave race. Tribes give way to kingdoms, and names we're familiar with begin to appear." - Caption on the sketches: "David Gaider's original sketches of the Dragon Age world. Wherever you see a name typed in, it's because it was changed by EA's in-house sensitivity team, which cross-checked place names with real-world names in case there was a clash. The area of Antiva, for example, used to be called Calabria, but Calabria is the name of a region in southern Italy. "Well, if you do something with the Calabrians that real Calabrians don't like, they might get upset," the sensitivity department at EA told Gaider. "So I was like, 'Oh fine, I'll change it,'" he says." - ""My feeling on history when it comes to worlds," Gaider says, "is that you need to have a lot of it." Without it, he says a world will feel like a facade. "Sometimes you'll see worlds where they've made only what is needed for their current story, and it's like an old Western set: it feels right, it looks right, but then you slowly get a sense of, 'Oh, there's nothing behind those doors.' Before he sat down to draw, Gaider already knew some of the geographical elements he wanted. He knew he wanted a topsy-turvy 'South was cold and North was hot' idea for the continent, to play with people's expectations, and he knew he wanted a large waterway - that he likens to the Mediterranean - carving its way far inland. Today, we know this as the Waking Sea, and it's an incredibly important feature in the Dragon Age games. Gaider also knew he wanted islands far up in the north, from which an unknown race could invade. "I knew that I wanted an 'other' race that would come along," he says, "which ended up being the Qunari." Gaider also knew he wanted untouched areas for adventure, like forests and mountains, just in case the game would need them. "I didn't want every place to be so civilised that when it came time for 'we need ruins' or 'we need massive wilderness', we've got nowhere to go because I've civilised the entire thing," he says."

"Because remember, the team didn't yet know where the game they were making would be set. That's why so much of the continent you see in the sketches is as yet unused in Dragon Age games - the series hasn't needed all of it by this point. Continents are vast, after all, and realising them in 3D for players to explore is a mighty task. "I guess in my head," Gaider says, "we would be probably either on the north of Ferelden, on what became the Free Marches, or maybe off in the west more towards the Tirashan Forest or the Hunterhorns. That was a very wild area and I was like, 'That's a good place for an adventure to be.' Atlas at hand, photocopies in front of him, Gaider set about his work of growing a game world from a bunch of maps, and with not a small amount of trepidation. There was a lot riding on the world after all; it was a far cry from the worlds he'd created and freely abandoned as a teenager. "This is going to form the foundation, ideally, for a lot of games," he says, "and a lot of people are going to do work [on it]. And the trepidation is like, 'I don't know what I'm doing.' I'm essentially the equivalent of a 13-year-old just going, 'La la la, I'm going to call this Ferelden!'" - "Some things bother David Gaider about the Dragon Age 1 map, still, and they occurred when artists prettied his sketches without his involvement. "Oh," he said awkwardly when they were presented to him. "I didn't want it to look like this, exactly." He says they added a lot more rivers and mountains, and flipping between his sketches and the Dragon Age: Origins map, you can see some have moved around, or gained prominence, and places like Redcliffe have shifted. Apparently people would take to the BioWare forums after the game came out to complain about the map's geography. "And I'm like, 'You know what? You got a point,'" Gaider says. This is mostly anger at himself, though, for not doing more about it. Similarly, he wishes he'd been able to sit down with artists and work out what the rest of the continent you don't see in his sketches looked like, so they didn't have to have "the continent just keeps going..."-like messages at the edge of it. "But to where?" Gaider says. But it speaks to something he's noticed in his decades working in games about artists and writers. "They really speak two different languages," he tells me. They process things differently and they tend to care about different things. There were reams of history and lore written in a "world bible" for the Dragon Age team, but getting artists to read it was another matter. They wanted clear visual cues, not piles of backstory. Dragon Age: Origins eventually found its setting in Ferelden, the kingdom in the bottom right bulge of the sketches, so it left a huge portion of the sketched world unused, which the team presumed no one would ever see. "We thought that was going to be the only one," he says of Dragon Age: Origins. "That's why when you get to the end of Origins, there's so many epilogues that cast off far into the future, which, if we'd known that we were going to keep going and keep going with history, we wouldn't have said, 'Oh, in fifty and one hundred years, this is going to happen.' I think we would have played our cards a little closer to our chest. EA apparently found the game very old-fashioned and thought no one wanted turn-based role-playing games like that any more, which of course now seems ridiculous given the success of Baldur's Gate 3. "Baldur's Gate just goes to show how wrong people are when it comes to industry wisdom," Gaider says."

"Nevertheless, when Dragon Age 2 eventually was green-lit, the scope of it, and the focus of it, would completely change. With it, BioWare and EA would push towards a console RPG experience that stopped and started less, and had more action-packed combat. And EA only gave BioWare 18 months to make it, so BioWare decided to make a much smaller, more tightly focused game. It seemed like a good idea at the time. "People at BioWare convinced themselves that the fans would be okay - it'll be fine if it's a smaller game," Gaider says. "And I don't know why we thought that was the case, but for a moment there in time, we were like, 'Yeah, sure, it'll be fine.'" As for the mapping, a tighter focus meant centering on one place rather than a whole region, so the city of Kirkwall on the Waking Sea became the heart of the game, and BioWare developed a time-jumping idea for the game so you could see it at various different points in your character's lifetime, which I still think is really neat. And because there wasn't a large region to explore, the game didn't need a sprawling map, so BioWare turned the map on its side to give Kirkwall some height and majesty instead. It wasn't particularly memorable, but it looked nice. The game didn't go down well. "Its highs were really high, and its lows were really low," Gaider says now. "It was very unpolished. If it even got six months more polish, I think the reception would have been a lot different." More importantly, it meant everything would need to change again for Dragon Age 3." - "In Dragon Age: Inquisition, the third game in the series, the map plays a starring role. It's built into the game world specifically so you and your Inquisition advisors can gather around it and push pieces about as you choose where to go next. Thematically, this fits neatly with the theme of running an organisation like the Inquisition, but the map was also required to cover a lot of ground. One thing BioWare knew the moment it started making the game was that it needed to be bigger than DA2. This time, the game would spread across areas of Ferelden we hadn't been to as well as some we had; up to Kirkwall and into surrounding Free Marches, and then west to the city of Orlais and onwards until it reached past the Waking Sea and arid desert land. But the sense of scale was an illusion. Dragon Age: Inquisition wasn't a continuous, open world, but a fragmented one, made up of a few open-world-like zones, some small parts of cities, and many 'you can't actually explore there, but you can read about it' text-window interactions. Again, this was Gaider's idea, to give the game "a feeling of breadth" without needing the art department to render it all in 3D. By the time Inquisition came out in 2014, the world of Thedas - the name an amalgamation of "the" and "Dragon Age Setting" by the way - had been reinterpreted for three games and touched by many pairs of hands. Gaider's writing team had plugged the holes he, as a single writer, couldn't fill, and the art team had shown us what the world looked like. There was even, fittingly, a Dragon Age encyclopaedia released, compiling the teetering piles of lore and backstory, and maps and imagery that BioWare created for it. People were now joining the team who were already fans of the series. This was no longer an imaginary world; Thedas felt real. And perhaps it no longer needed Gaider to steer it."

- "So Gaider left BioWare in 2016, having worked there for 17 years, most of it spent on Dragon Age. Really, he'd had enough of wizards and demons, and Anthem wasn't the tonic he sought. Eventually, he'd move all the way from Canada to Australia for a fresh start, where he'd start Summerfall Studios and make a role-playing musical called Stray Gods, which was released last year. That game, incidentally, only featured a small map for travelling between city locations. Today, he awaits the arrival of a new Dragon Age game - Dragon Age: Dreadwolf - like the rest of us, having had no direct input. It's an anxious wait, as you can imagine. "I was Mr Dragon Age for ten years," he says, "so there is a certain amount of attachment. I'm not sure how I will feel when Dragon Age 4 comes out. I have a hard time believing that if I play it, I won't spend a lot of the time second guessing any choices I see, like, 'Oh, hmm, I wouldn't have done that.' What if they bring back some characters that I wrote? They're going to Tevinter so what if Dorian's there? Gah! I don't know; I am of two minds as to whether or not I will even play it." "It makes me wonder about these people who create worlds, who draw them into existence - whether that's in a preliminary sketch or a lavish piece of artwork - and whether there's always a point where success comes with the consequence of ceding control. Had Gaider kept the world of Dragon Age to himself, a photocopied map, folded and stuffed in a back pocket, we'd never have played it. And had millions of people not played and enjoyed it, I wouldn't be writing about it now and have that feeling when I look at an image of one of Gaider's photocopies, that I'm in the presence of something special, something powerful. But it's no longer Gaider's map, and no longer Gaider's world. It's all of ours."" - "For Gaider, maps are snapshots of history, photocopied slideshows explaining how places came to be. And of course they are, because he was thinking about Dragon Age when he started in on maps, which meant that he was thinking about geography, sure, but also the passing of time, and the way the latter affects the former."

[source and full article]

#dragon age: dreadwolf #dragon age 4 #the dread wolf rises #da4 #dragon age #bioware #video games #longpost #long post #anthem

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adora-but-ginger · 1 year

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Sparks Fly

pairing: joel miller x gn!reader

summary: joel and ellie find someone who isn’t too pleased with how them and joel’s last interaction went.

word count: around 2.1k

warnings: typical tlou violence and warnings (i’m comparing it to the game’s usual amount), angst that turns into fluff, slight tlou part one spoilers in terms of people mentioned, use of weapons and guns, swearing, joel getting frustrated because no one is letting him talk, ellie on her queen shit

masterlist

a/n: i love naming fics after taylor’s songs, they’re so fun! also don’t ask for a timeline because all i know is that it’s before the university but after bill, but oh my god i love this game so much, and the tv show is just *chefs kiss* so far. on my pedro pascal shit as usual, but i really like writing for joel! oh and i wrote this literally three hours ago and could not tell you what is going on. thank you for reading <3

should i make a part two?

one last thing! don’t repost my stories, if you do, i hope a clicker gets you, yes you, first :)

(credit to gif owner!)

Joel Miller was many things, but apologetic wasn’t one of them. So, when he felt the all too familiar whoosh of a bullet purposely landing in the dirt not even a foot beside him, he knew showing up was a mistake. If Tess hadn’t put that damned idea in his head to check in on you, he really wouldn’t have put another conscience thought in your direction.

You appeared in his unconscious mind much more than he’d like to admit though.

Snapping back to his current reality, he heard an all too familiar voice, albeit tinted with the age of surviving all these years, yell towards him and Ellie packed full of fury.

“Weapons on the ground and hands up now.” When no one moved, the voice reverberated again. “Now.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Ellie shot a look towards the older man, her face proving her to be more annoyed than anything.

“If I need to repeat myself again, the next shot won’t miss. Hands. Up.”

Setting his revolver on the ground, he closed his eyes as he slowly called your name in a hesitant greeting. Ellie snapped her head towards him again at his familiarity with you. “This is who Tess was talking about? Seriously?”

“Ellie--” Joel scolded, turning slowly to face you. His eyes moved from the dirt beneath him to meet your eyes, and that’s when he knew he really shouldn’t have come. You look a bit startled, a bit of anger rising beneath your gaze, as the realization of who you were talking to hit.

“Are my eyes deceiving me, or is that Joel Miller before me right now?” A scoff accompanied your words. Joel gritted his teeth, a deep sigh rumbling through him.

“Listen, I--” Your voice cut his off before he could even form a sentence.

“Give me one good reason why I don’t put a bullet between your eyes this very moment. I told you not to show your face to me again.”

Ellie flipped her hands over, eyes narrowing. “Joel what is going--”

“Ellie now is not the time.” His accent was cutting through thicker than usual, most likely due to the situation. “Tess told me to make sure you’re still alive and I figured, hell, we could use some help.”

He saw your eyes roll, but you holstered your gun anyways. “Last time I talked to her, I told her to leave me be.” Your head moved towards the teen. “Who’s she?”

Ellie spoke up before he had the chance to. “She is none of your business.”

“This is Ellie.” Joel lowered his arms back to his sides. “Listen, I know that we left each other on a lousy note, but--”

You cut him off again, cussing under your breath. “Considering it a ‘lousy note’ would be putting it mildly. Plus, it was not a mutual leaving.”

“Goddammit, can you stop interrupting me?” He closed his eyes in frustration, taking another breath to try to calm his nerves. “Can we discuss this inside somewhere? It took us too many infected to get here just for all of us to be out in the open like sitting ducks.”

“Who do you take me for? You know damn well that I of all people would keep this place guarded.” He saw you shift into a more casual stance, slouching on on leg, hostility still present in your glare towards him. “Yeah, follow me. But--” you raised your pointer finger towards the two. “Don’t go off the path. I’ve loaded this place with traps that took way too long to set up just for someone to carelessly set off.”

Walking behind you from a distance, Joel glanced around at the spot you had set up for yourself to live in. A nudge from Ellie brought his attention to her.

“What the fuck did you do to piss them off so much?”

He took a second before answering. “I got them caught in a FEDRA ambush, not knowingly of course, but they didn’t stick around long enough for any explanations.” He looked at the old ruins they were all passing by--barns ruined by the bombs that hit non-quarantined areas, cars overgrown with that copper-tinted rust, wire lined up as defenses on all four sides of them. If it weren’t for the green that came with nature reclaiming what was taken from her, this place, this planet, would be a wasteland.

Humans weren’t the only thing being destroyed.

“Were you in a relationship with them or something?” She smirked as she spoke.

“That’s not relevant information.”

Her smirk now fully forming into a grin, she continued with a chuckle. “Oh, you totally were!”

He grunted in response, quickly mumbling a “that’s none of your business” before quickening his steps to meet yours, partially to avoid any more questions, and partially to make sure you weren’t leading them to an untimely death.

As the trio strolled into the makeshift camp, Joel took another look at you. Age had done you well, and while he knew he was walking on ice thin as a sheet of paper, part of him was glad to see you.

He was never that good with emotions--he had a tendency to close most feelings out besides the consistent fear and anger that came with living in this time, and people knew that. He wasn’t good with understanding that people cared about him, or that he cared for others.

Not since Sarah at least.

But for the first time in longer than he could remember, he felt something other than those two feelings blossom when he talked to you. He didn’t have a name for what he felt, but his shitty reality got a little better whenever you were around, and that had to mean something, hadn’t it?

“I have some food in the kitchen if you two are hungry, down the hall to the left.” You called out, going to the right instead. He followed Ellie into the kitchen you had set up, her moving to rummage through anything she could find for the both of them. He was still lost in his own world, a world which was filled with nothing but memories of what life used to be.

It was the Ellie’s voice that brought him back to the current moment, a trend he had begun to notice.

“You think they’re beautiful.” Her words carried an sense of teasing around them.

Joel nearly choked on the air around him at her statement, the wind being knocked out of him just by her call out. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Except you do.” An accusatory finger pointed his way. “You get this...look in your eye that I can’t explain, but it’s the same look you get only when you see something beautiful. A sunset, a new weapon, them.” she smirked as she said the last part.

“Have you found anything to eat yet?” Changing the subject was his next best option. Ellie hadn’t known him for that long and already she was starting to read him like an open book. He could see her little celebration at her victory as she turned towards the cabinets. “Go see if you can find any supplies or anythin’ of the sorts after the grub, and no more talk about this.”

Taking one last look at the room, he went to go find you, which given the size of the establishment didn’t take very long. He could hear Ellie say “You like them!” in a sing-song manner as he left, and he opted to ignore her as he moved through the rooms.

When he walked into the space you were in and saw you, he took a second to notice what had changed over the years. He wasn’t sure if you noticed him yet and was thankful for bit of quiet if he was being honest. He knew back then that had the two of you met pre-outbreak, he damn near would’ve fallen for you in a heartbeat, and Tommy would’ve made fun of him for it for hours. The way you held yourself, your personality, how you made an effort to care about him, well, needless to say he would have made a move much sooner than he did.

You held his heart in the palm of your hand, and you didn’t even know it.

Your hair hadn’t changed much, but if he looked closely enough, he could see some gray speckling its usual colour. He shook his head as he realized that the girl was right about his feelings towards you.

Goddammit, Ellie.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” His eyes widened at the fact that he’d been caught by you, who turned around to face him with an eyebrow raised. When he didn’t respond, you disappeared into a little room to the right, emerging moments later with a wet cloth, handing it to him. He was never a man of many words, and you always respected that. “You smell, wash your face a bit yeah?”

Taking it, a chuckle emitted from deep within him. “Good to see you haven’t changed much.” It felt good to feel the cool water on his face.

“Joel, why are you here, seriously?” The way you looked at him made an unusual flutter erupt from his heart, not that he would ever admit that out loud. The effect you had on him made him feel like a goddamned high-schooler.

“She’s important, Ellie is, and I need to get her to the fireflies.” You scoffed at the last part, and you rolled your eyes, sitting down at a little table near the little room’s entry, motioning him to do the same.

“You know the fireflies are full of it. What, is she the daughter of some big wig or somethin’ like that?”

He mirrored your scoff, slouching into the chair across from you. “Somethin’ like that. You just got to trust me on this one.”

You raised an eyebrow and just slightly tilted your head in response. “Remember what happened the last time I trusted you?”

He kept his mouth shut at that, a silence so loud that a clicker could walk through unalarmed, tension filling the air.

“I didn’t know that they were planning to sell you out, was just relaying information down the line.”

He watched you as you pushed up from your chair with another roll of your eyes, stretching in the process. “Yeah, well you did. It doesn’t bother me as much as it used to, but that was a real shitty thing you did to me there.”

He heard you take a deep breath at his lack of response.

“But I guess we’ve all done things we regret since the outbreak, so might as well let bygones be bygones, yeah? How about a fresh start?” When he met your gaze, he saw a brief whisp of a smile grace your features, going by so quick that he could have imagined it.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” He felt a weight he didn’t recognize leave his shoulders, and maybe that’s why he spoke what he did next. “You could come with us, you know, to deliver Ellie. God knows she gets tired of me sometimes, and I wouldn’t mind the company.” He couldn’t control the words leaving his mouth and didn’t even process what he said until he saw your contemplating face. His heart was beating faster, and he cursed himself for acting like a boy with a little crush.

“Plus, he thinks you’re beautiful!” A third voice rushed in, making the two others whirl to see Ellie standing in the door frame, eyes wide and locking with his almost as if he would stop her if she spoke any slower. Which he would’ve.

“Ellie, I swear to all things holy you--”

Your laugh makes his words die off, amusement echoing in its wake. “Always been the charmer, you have, Joel.” Walking to face him with the brunette behind you, you leaned in close to his ear before continuing. “A fresh start, right?” and then he felt it. You had placed a kiss right on his cheek, and a feeling he hadn’t felt since he saw you last rose within him. Looking at you with pupils slightly blown, he watched as you winked at him before heading towards Ellie. “So, he say anything else like that about me?”

Not many could break the exterior he placed as a barrier for himself--it took some people years to even get a kind response out of him. But not even an hour after running into you again, and he knew he was putty in your hands.

Joel Miller was many things, and in love (whether he would admit that to himself or not), was becoming one of them.

#the last of us #tlou part 1 #tlou spoilers #ellie williams #joel miller #joel miller x #joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfiction #pedro pascal #tlou fanfiction #joel miller x you

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eregyrn-falls · 1 year

Text

Organizing a Stan Twins-centric Multi-Artist Lyric Comic!

There's a song I've always wanted to see as an AMV or a lyric comic for the Stan Twins, and years pass, and I've never been able to tackle a project that big. So, I wanted to try to organize it as a multi-artist lyric comic!

The song is "Trouble", by Avicii. (See below.)

What is a multi-artist lyric comic? One where people sign up, and each artist is assigned a line from the song. Artists will then do 1 page for their line, and at the end, it's all put together. Here is an example from GF fandom in 2018. (Here is a video version that someone put together with the music.)

This song has 28 lines of lyrics, but it also has some instrumental breaks, and I've thought of a way to fill those that would allow more people to participate (particularly if someone was unsure if they could take on a full page).

Here's the song:

youtube

There's a lot of details to go into, so to keep this post from taking up too much dash real estate, I'm going to put more detail below a read-more.

Here is a link to a Google form you can fill out to indicate interest. (But we do urge you to read over the details below!)

The goal would be to complete this in time to make it public on August 31st or Sept. 1st, 2023 -- in line with the actual last days in-story of the show. Therefore, the due date for final art will likely be around August 15th or 20th.

I hope folks will find this intriguing! I think it could be a lot of fun!

@mercury-falls and I are the point-people for this, at the moment!

All right -- the way I've always seen it, the first verse of the song is very Stan-related, and the second verse is very Ford related.

Here is a Google Doc with the lyrics.

My idea for the instrumental breaks was to have people contribute smaller pieces of art that look a bit like Polaroid snapshots. If we can get the lyric comic combined with the music, think of the collection of Polaroids accumulating the way they do at the end of the show's opening credits.

There are two main ways artists can contribute to the project:

For lyrics, full landscape illustrations (which include color, lettering, and a background)

For instrumental breaks, polaroid-style illustrations (smaller, simpler pieces in square format). We will use these in a video edit of the comic and have them accumulate like the show’s intro during the breaks. (We will also figure out a good way to display them in the lyric-comic post itself.)

Your art should be canon-compliant, and can depict any time period of the Stans’ lives (past, present, and near-future)! Do with your art as you best see fit with your lyrics, but keep the focus on the Stans and their relationships with each other and other GF characters. Both original content and screenshot adaptations are welcome!

We also welcome collaborations between artists on full pages! We encourage every artist in the project to help and support each other if they are comfortable. On the interest form, you can tell us if you are interested in volunteering to help others with inking, coloring, or creating backgrounds! Or, you can tell us if you think you will need help.

On the form, you can indicate your preference towards the Stan or Ford verses. But once we have the team of artists doing lyrics chosen, we will randomize the list and then contact people in order, to ask about preferences for lyrics. If you aren't chosen for one of the full pages, we would still like to have you involved for the Polaroids! (And you can indicate willingness to be called on to do a page if others drop out.)

We will have check-in dates through the summer, with goals for people to report on the subject of their piece; to have a sketch or layout ready to show; and to show progress closer to the end.

We will be setting up a Discord server to help share information, and to allow people to post WIPs or just generally discuss things, and keep motivation going. If you really don't use Discord, though, and don't want to sign up for it, that's okay. We will put whatever instructions and details we have in a Google Doc, and will share that link for reference. And we can always communicate via email.

I (Eregyrn speaking!) have been involved in a LOT of fan projects over the years. One of the key things to ask of people who sign up for a project is: communication. That is, if you're having difficulties, just let us know! If you need to drop out, just let us know! Don't feel guilty that you signed up and then had to drop out. The thing that is hardest on organizers of projects like this is when people sign up, but disappear and don't answer DMs or emails. Believe me, I've been in that position where you feel guilty and don't want to admit that you have to drop out -- but it's always much easier on the organizers if you just let them know, instead of keeping them guessing! This is just something to keep in mind when you're signing up -- life happens! It's okay! But please try to let us know if something comes up and you have to bow out.

Here is the link to the Google Form, that you can fill out to indicate interest.

#gravity falls #stanford pines #stanley pines #sea grunks!#lyric comics #trouble lyric comic #multi artist project #multi artist lyric comic

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midwestmade29 · 5 months

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Rectify ❤️‍🔥

My story came to life from the “one prompt a day” post from @urfriendlywriter you’ll find here 🙂 this one was called “touch starved.” I’m excited to see what ones are next! Also, you'll find 2-3 other prompts from @loveisanimaginarydagger3000's list in my story too! You can find the prompts here

( Side note: this was my take on someone being “touch starved.” I’m sure it means different things to different people, this was just what I gravitated towards.)

Word count: 1,839 Divider by: @saradika-graphics

If you are not 18+ years old, please KEEP SCROLLING. Minors do not interact.

Due to the explicit nature, this story is NSFW or minors.

Dominant male, unprotected sex. Read at your own discretion.

Matt was on my mind a lot today and I saw the writing prompts and my brain ran with it 😏

Matt Jackson rectifies your “situation” in the sexiest of ways…

Matt sat on the other side of the table with his mouth agape as he stared at you. He was stunned by your answer to the question he had just asked you, which made you squirm in your seat at the sudden silence that surrounded your table. His reaction to you telling him that you hadn’t been touched or kissed by a man in almost a year made you regret even saying anything. Crawling into a dark hole or flying away sounded good right about now! You cleared your throat in hopes that would snap Matt out of the stupor he was in, but he barely even blinked. “Matt, say something…” You quietly begged. “Do you want me to leave? I can have the waitress separate our checks…” Matt immediately grabbed your hand as you stood up from the table, finally showing some sign of life. “No, please sit. I’m sorry, I just can’t believe that!” he blurted out. “You can’t believe what? you asked sheepishly. Matt could tell that his choice of words didn’t come across like he meant them to when he saw you sink down in your chair a little. “Look at you, Y/N. You’re stunning. Any guy that doesn’t realize that needs to get their eyes checked! If you were mine, I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off you.” His last words caused your cheeks to flush and your core to do a flip flop at the thought of Matt all over you.

“I mean there have been offers, but none I’ve wanted. They weren’t the person I wanted to be intimate with…” you hinted while never breaking eye contact. “I see. And who exactly did you want to be intimate with?” he purred, already knowing the answer. When you didn’t respond right away, Matt prompted you to explain. “Come on, don’t leave me hanging! Say it Y/N.” You bit your bottom lip timidly, causing Matt’s eyes to darken as he noticed the little indents your teeth left. He was the one squirming now! “You know who I’m talking about…” “Yes, I do but I need to hear you say it baby.” The grit in his low voice was incredibly sexy and it was making your arousal grow just from the sound of it. “You. I wanted you, Matt.” He smirked after his name fell from your lips, asking you an additional question that made you swallow hard. “And is that something you still want? To be intimate with me?” “It’s been so long since I’ve been touched, kissed properly, completely ravaged. But, when I’m alone at night in my bed, you’re who I think about while I touch myself. I imagine your hands roaming freely on my body, your lips leaving goosebumps wherever they touch…” You were cut off by the waitress when they came to the table to ask if they could get either of you anything. Matt quickly handed the waitress his credit card without even asking for the bill, clearly unconcerned with how much dinner was. Once the bill was officially paid for, Matt held your hand as he briskly walked towards the exit and into an Uber. “What are we doing?” you asked puzzled. “We are going to rectify your situation. We’re going back to my hotel room.”

Butterflies were fluttering in your stomach as Matt walked around you slowly, eyeing you hungrily while planning his course of action. There was a crackle in the air from the sexual tension that continued to build, the heat between your legs ever growing. You jumped slightly when Matt pressed his body into your back but reveled in the feeling of him being so close. He wrapped one arm around your abdomen pulling you even closer, while his free hand brushed your hair away from your ear and neck. Your breathing became shallow and breathy when Matt whispered in your ear, “Are you sure you want this, Y/N? You really want to do this and give yourself to me?” Your clit was throbbing for this man, your muscles tense with want. There was no doubt in your mind, body, and soul that you wanted Matt to have his way with you. You turned to face him, giving him your final answer. “Yes, I’m sure I want this. I want whatever you have in store Matt. Don’t hold back, don’t hesitate. Fuck me so good that I’ll still feel the effects from it in the morning.” A groan escaped from deep inside of him when he picked you up and carried you over to the bed and laying you down on the mattress. He kissed you fiercely, his lips soft and warm against yours. Matt only broke contact momentarily as he pulled your shirt over your head, and skillfully unclasping your bra next and tossing it to the floor. “Mmm, so beautiful baby.” He praised as he took each of your breasts in his hands, massaging them before leaning down and kissing each pink circle. Your nipples started to pucker the more his tongue flicked all around them, and you couldn’t help but to gasp when he sucked hard and released them from his mouth immediately afterwards. He lowered his head down to kiss you again, ghosting his lips against yours before pulling back again with a smug smirk, making you chase him in desperation. Matt was very much in control of the situation, taking the lead like he did with mostly everything else. He stood up, leaving your body longing for more.

You watched every move he made as he pulled his shirt over his head before undoing his belt buckle and letting his pants slide down to the floor. His hard length was straining against his boxer briefs, longing to be set free from all restrictions. Matt didn’t remove his underwear just yet, instead he made quick work of taking your pants and panties off simultaneously leaving you completely naked and exposed on the bed. Your body responded to his touch as his hands slid up your body, setting it ablaze every inch they covered. Matt watched how your body reacted to the slightest touches and he studied your facial cues making sure what he was doing felt good to you. He finally kissed you and you grabbed ahold of his hair to keep him in place so he couldn’t break away this time. Holy shit was he a good kisser! Your tongues danced together as your hands desperately grasped at one another, gasping into each other’s mouths like you couldn’t get enough. When you came up for air, Matt’s hand started trailing down your body. His fingertips lightly creating a path in between your breasts, down to your stomach and stopping at your pelvis. “I want to touch you, baby. Feel your wetness on my fingers. Is that okay?” he asked breathlessly. “Yes…” was the only response your brain could offer since it was in overdrive. You lower half bucked off the bed when he began making circles with his finger on your clit. You whimpered at his touch when he inserted two fingers inside of you. “Shit, you’re so tight baby. So wet and warm.” He murmured next to your ear.

“Please Matt! I need you. Fuck me now, I want to feel all of you!” you begged. After he removed his boxer briefs, he positioned himself in between your legs, aligning his length up with your entrance. The anticipation was killing you and your nerves rose to the surface again. You knew you wanted this and that you asked for all of it. You were more concerned with being good enough for Matt and making him feel good too. He took notice of the worried look on your face and asked tenderly, “What’s wrong baby? Are you okay? Do you want to stop?” “I-I just want you to feel good. I want it to be good for you…” you said, almost inaudible. “You are pure perfection Y/N. I’m so turned on by you that I almost exploded just looking at you earlier! Don’t think baby, just feel.” His words gave you the comfort and confidence you needed to proceed, and he kissed you passionately before pushing himself inside of you. At first it was a little uncomfortable since it had been so long since you’ve been intimate with someone, but Matt was sweet and took it slow, allowing you to adjust to his thickness. Your walls squeezed and pulled him, making him shiver at the sensation. Matt’s long dark hair tickled your face as it fell around you, his scent filling your nose and the look of lust in his eyes sending you into overdrive. Matt made each slow and deep thrust count, hitting all the right spots every single time! Even though his intentions were to fuck you like you asked him to, and his original plan was to rectify you of being touch starved, his passion and vulnerability still shined through. Matt interlocked his fingers with yours and brought your hands above your head, beads of sweat falling on your cheek as he lowered his body, making sure it was flush against yours.

His body blanketed over you, and his weight pinned you against the mattress. You couldn’t get enough of him and being this close almost felt like it wasn’t close enough. “Matt!” you cried out into the air. “I’m almost there…don’t stop!” He sighed against your lips as the pleasure was overtaking him too. The headboard was knocking against the wall with each deep thrust, the sound of your bodies connecting echoing through the room. Matt released your hands, and they instantly made their way onto his back, nails scraping and digging into his skin there. His arms were on each side of your head as he leaned against them for support, never losing his rhythm as he got better situated. Your orgasm tore through your body, the intensity of it almost taking your breath away! You cried out Matt’s name as the waves of your release crashed over you. “You’re so sexy baby…” Matt cooed against your cheek. While your walls pulsated against his length, Matt found his release too. You could feel every drop fill you as he pumped himself in and out a few more times as he rode out his release. You were both breathless and sweaty, and completely satisfied. Matt kissed you before removing himself from you, causing both of you to groan from the loss of contact. He laid down next to you, trying to steady his breathing as he opened his arms to you, encouraging you to scoot closer and cuddle with him. Your head rested on his chest, and he pulled the covers over you both so neither of you would get chilled.

Before the two of you drifted off to sleep, you spoke softly as you nuzzled closer to Matt. “I think you created a monster.” “Why do you say that?” he asked half asleep. “I’m already wondering when we can do that again…”

That GIF though…🥵

#matt Jackson #matt jackson smut #matt jackson x y/n #matt jackson fanfiction #smut #aew fanfiction #fanfiction #young bucks #the young bucks #the elite #aew #all elite wrestling #fanfic #matt jackson x reader

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j0kers-light · 5 months

Note

Joker wanting batmans girl for a while and seducing her ;) Your blog is my happy place 💖

His Lighthouse: Giving Into Temptation (LedgerJoker x f!reader)

Giving into Temptation- Oneshot

Hey hi anon! 🖤✨

I'm so happy to hear my silly little blog is your happy place!! Oh this was a delight to write! Almost all of it was written on my phone at my desk!! A rarity for me since I tend to write exclusively on my👩🏾‍💻

Anyhoo! I took some creative liberties since you didn't specify if the seducing was reciprocated. 👀 hehe.. you gave me an idea and let got of the reigns.

I hope you enjoy anon! If not I can try again 😭😭😭

taglist:

@blackreaderatrisk @twinkledinkle @clemdango04 @l3ejm @tears-of-amber @what-an-angel @darthjokerisyourfather @thatsnoteii @dollster @cheetahspy @kaidennnnn @urdariingdoll @motivation-idontknowher @ins0mniac-whack @spaghettificationandpretzels @reneisance @alittlesmartcookie @ninacutebee16 @carydorse

Let me know if you wish to be added to the official His Lighthouse taglist! Be alerted with any oneshots and the main story updates! 🖤✨

In all fairness, good ol' Batsy should have hidden you better. If Joker could put two and two together, then honestly.. anyone could!

The lingering stares, the way Batman treated you after heroic saves, to video surveillance of the caped crusader entering your apartment at odd hours of the night..

You were Batman's secret lover and as such, an ideal target for his adversaries.

Joker squealed in delight when he got the final confirmation that you were Batman's girl. He couldn't wait to get his hands on you and bring the fearsome hero to his knees.

Love could make people do crazy things and Joker wanted to test that theory out on Batman.

Months of planning the perfect kidnapping was done in great detail and Joker only trusted himself to execute it. The planning involved closely monitoring you and getting even closer to learn your traits and habits.

Joker lived and breathed everything related to you to gather enough information to pull off this mission. He never calculated getting emotionally attached to you and that led to his own downfall.

He studied your daily routine until he could memorize it in his sleep. And he took great pride in knowing little details that you hardly knew about yourself. Joker knew what certain food you liked or which bouquet of flowers made you smile the brightest and unknowingly began pursuing you.

Whenever you had bad days at work, he would leave gifts at your front door with a little note:

"For you" with a crudely scribbled heart.

It was natural that you were hesitant to accept the offerings but eventually you chalked it up to being from Batman.

Joker hated that so he went out of his way to prove that it wasn't. He bought you personalized self care products and your favorite candy on days when Bats was absent yet you still assumed it was from your lover.

J wasn't sure when his ploy to kidnap you turned into courting you instead. It was a gradual shift with how quickly you sucked him into your world.

Suddenly it wasn't a burden but a pleasure to keep tabs on you. He wanted to see a smile on your face and be the cause behind it.

If you traveled via public transit, Joker would protect you during the commute. He'd take out your trash and leave subtle clues that your rent was due while you were at work. It took everything in him not to just pay it outright but in doing so, it would bring too much alarm to himself.

Joker hated it— but he had to care for you from afar. He provided for you far better than Batman did yet he got all the credit!

Joker was at his wits end but months of unsuccessfully wooing you were about to change.

You left your window open.

It wasn't a big deal, (it was Batman's entrance into your flat) but tonight it was well known that the bat was preoccupied.

Joker was skeptical as he settled into his normal spot to monitor you. Only you surprised him again by going off schedule.

On Thursdays, dinner was done around seven and you either took a shower or a very looooong bath which ended roughly around nine. Your valued beauty sleep and strived to be in bed around ten if Bats didn't stop by.

Just thinking about what the two of you did together made Joker's blood boil. Bats indeed was a lucky man.

All jealousy aside.. The bee shaped night light that Joker gifted you casted silhouettes of your supple form as you moved around the apartment, just like the busy bee he named you after.

It didn't matter what time of the day it was, you were always up doing something. Tonight, you completely deviated from your schedule and skipped a bath to prepare for bed early.

By no means was Joker a gentleman however he found himself looking away when you walked by the window, removing your shirt. Another reason why he hated Batman: you were absolutely stunning and confident enough to strip out in the open— even if you were in the privacy of your own home.

Normally Joker watched you through the curtains but tonight you unknowingly gave him a front row seat to the best show in the world. And when you bent over to take off your pants, Joker couldn't bear it anymore.

He was blinded by your beauty and honestly it felt like he was invading your privacy; as if the months of stalking you wasn't the exact same thing.

He counted to two hundred and opened his eyes. Good. You were securing your hair for bed— wearing the most beautiful lingerie set Joker had ever seen.

His heart stopped as you left the bee light on and slipped underneath the covers.

Joker didn't come back to your apartment for a few days after that peepshow. One, because he felt guilty for staring, and two, because Batman was back.

Batman threw a wrench in Joker's surveillance routine for a full week. Joker didn't realize just how much he looked forward to being around you until he wasn't.

J spent his downtime ordering his gang members around and committing other crimes while trying his hardest not to think about you.

You and your gorgeous smile, the way you parted your hair so it fell over your eyes, (they were the shiniest gems in the world in his opinion) to the sound of your voice as you sang along to music, down to the intricate tattoo that curved up your hip that J so desperately wanted to trace with his tongue..

Oh no.

He was thinking way too deep here. You were a target! Joker would use you to break the Bat once and for all. He had a goal and it echoed in his mind quite clearly.

Break the Bat. Use you to break the Bat. Use you.. to.. break... well well well. Suddenly lightbulbs went off in Joker's head. He could have his cake and eat it too.

Joker ensured a big crime halfway across the city distracted Batman from visiting you and once the coast was clear, he took up his vigil. Nothing had changed but you foolishly left your window open again. It's like you wanted someone to kill you in your sleep.

That could be arranged.

It was Friday night and you normally stayed indoors either to binge watch a show or work on your laptop in the living room all night.

You did neither. Joker concluded that you weren't home after a quick scan. It was the green light for him to enter and check on his internal systems.

He planted a mic and a motion detector in your living room but they hadn't picked up any readings for quite some time. He feared Batman may have found it or that it was damaged somehow.

Thankfully your apartment has access to the fire escape so Joker could hop in straight into your living room with no issues. Your flat was dark and quiet so he moved in a lax manner to check on his equipment when he abruptly stopped.

Down the hall, your bedroom door was cracked open. He didn't want to believe what he thought he heard yet it was undeniable.

A soft, but audible, moan.

He wanted to hear it again. Joker didn't know his feet carried him to your room until you shrieked in alarm when the door creaked open.

"Ah! Um.. B-Bats? Is that you?" You were about to turn on a top light when Joker rushed over to stop you.

His hands were freezing cold especially with the leather gloves he wore. You were used to the Kevlar material of the Batsuit being warm and rigid on your skin, not cold. You flinched back because of it.

"Your hands are ice! I thought you said the suit has an inner warming system? Bats? Are you still there?"

You were naturally curious. Joker had only seconds before that curiosity got the better of you and you investigated further. He couldn't talk and give away that he wasn't your caped lover, so he didn't risk replying.

Joker just climbed in the bed behind you.

"W-Wait! Wait!" But it was too late. Joker was already flush with your body under the covers and he was in heaven.

Your soft curves were right there for the taking and Joker's hands shook with the need to caress them. For now his hands hovered an inch above your skin, frozen in place.

You heard a shaky sigh behind you and it wasn't the deep modulated one that the cowl normally created.

Something wasn't right but you didn't want to tip the stranger off that you were onto them. Whoever this was, they nuzzled their nose into your neck and the sensation made you shiver.

Why did it feel so good?

"Um.. I wasn't expecting you to visit t-tonight. Can you give me a minute to, ah! C-Cold!"

Joker lost the fight and rested his glove clad hands on your heated skin. It was slick with sweat and he briefly wondered if you were hot from a fever. It would explain the moan he heard. What if you were in pain?

Joker gently shushed you as he used his cold hands to try and cool you down; however, they did more harm than good.

You began to squirm as Joker's hands roamed your body. Then he heard that sweet melody again: your stifled whine. He wanted to hear it unobstructed so he rubbed your lower stomach as he brushed his lips against your neck.

"Ngh.. uhh um.. I-I thought you didn't lik— ah!"

Another hush entered your ears as Joker finally gained the courage to move his fingers in between your thighs. And then he discovered why you were soooo hot. He scoffed and rewarded you with a proper kiss to your neck.

You were absolutely soaked.

His busy bee was busy touching herself when he snuck in. How cute.

You clawed at Joker's wrist but you didn't say anything to stop him. All that fell from your lips were moans and whimpers. He loved each and every one of them. You rolled your head further back into the pillows and Joker followed your retreat to sample the taste of your skin.

He would definitely leave hickeys but neither of you cared at the moment. Right now, Joker's fingers rubbed perfect little circles on your clit while his other hand snaked around to pinch your neglected nipples. It was thrilling to allow a complete stranger to touch you. It made you sob in pleasure.

The closer you climbed, the more your body bucked in Joker's arms. He tried his best not to blow his cover with any form of communication.

And it was by far the hardest thing he ever had to do.

He knew you were right there, teetering on the edge of bliss. He wanted nothing more to shower you with the praises you needed to get off.

All Joker could do was hum and hope you followed his nonverbal cues. And because you were such a good girl, you did.

The dam finally broke with a broken plea spilling from your lips. Joker bit his own when your juices pooled in his palm and soiled the bed sheets.

He didn't stop rubbing your clit until you meekly cried, too sensitive. But the sound of your sloppy pussy just called him to do the right thing. You needed more attention.

Joker rolled you onto your stomach and the motion startled you out of your afterglow. Well that, and something was currently poking you in the lower back.

This wasn't something Batman would do. Sure he manhandled you quite a bit, (he remained in his suit ninety percent of the time during his nightly visits) but he was never like this.

Absolutely nothing was wrong with this level of passion, in fact you craved it, although it didn't feel right.

Either something was wrong with Batman or your suspicions were correct that it wasn't him. If not, then you had a good guess on who it was.

He wasn't as stealthy as he thought.

You turnt your head to catch a glimpse in the mirror. Even though it was pitch black in your bedroom, the moonlight worked in your favor to identify the man hovering above you. What you saw was enough to make your worst fears come to life.

You weren't stupid. Someone other than Batman was watching you these past few months. The uneasy feeling of being followed, things in your apartment not being where you left it, and the most incriminating evidence— finding a hidden mic in your living room led you to your hypothesis.

You were being watched by someone dangerous and the flowers and other pretty gifts couldn't gloss over that fact.

The smart thing to do was confront Batman about it. It could actually be his equipment but there was no reason for him to spy on you.

Which led you to believe that it wasn't Bats. In that case you decided not to tell him. You were just a booty call; he wasn't responsible for your safety.

This was a problem you could handle on your own and you would start troubleshooting it right now.

"Um c-condoms are in the second drawer." You arched your back and Joker's gaze dropped down to admire it.

He hesitated and the silence made you fess up.

"I-I know who you are. I don't know much about Batman.. um he and I aren't really that close. So I'm afraid I won't be the best hostage if you decide to um, kidnap me." You paused to laugh but it lacked mirth. "I doubt he'd come rescue me anyway."

Joker was speechless. What man in their right mind wouldn't come rescue you?! He just couldn't wrap his head around the insanity of it.

You gasped when Joker flipped you back over to face him. In the dark, the Prince of Crime hovered above you looking absolutely furious.

But not toward you. He caressed your cheek with the back of his hand and spoke for the first time.

Hearing Joker on the news was one thing. His voice was designed to instill fear in the hearts of many, yet in this intimate little bubble within your bedroom, his voice was liquid honey to your ears.

"BaT-mannn is a fool. The most uhh, precious thing in the worldd is right here.. and he refuses to protect it."

He traced his fingers from your temple down to your trembling lips. "Tell me little bee. Does he treat ya right? And. Don't. Lie."

Joker bent down to continue marking your neck. You jumped and rested your hands upon his shoulders, trying to drum up the right response.

Could you really tell your lover's sworn enemy that you weren't happy? Sure Batman was an experienced lover— he brought a sense of thrill into your bed, but once he was done, that was it.

Batman was too busy for proper affection. He was always on the go and oftentimes your time with him was interrupted by crimes in the area.

Your 'relationship' with Batman was a fleeting one. He kept his cowl on and you didn't ask any unnecessary questions.

You knew he had other lovers but when he slipped through your window, he was yours— if only for a few hours.

Was that enough? No. You craved for something that you'll never have so when the random flowers and gifts appeared in your apartment, you were optimistic.

You felt desired again! What hopeless romantic wouldn't ignore the red flags?

So what if The Joker stalked you for months? It was attention that you didn't have before. He cared for you more than Batman did and proved to be a better lover too. The little things that Joker did added up far greater than Batman's sporadic moments of affection. Could you even compare the two to begin with?

It was wrong to betray your lover but since when did Batman deserve that much respect?

Joker was waiting on an answer and he wasn't idle.

His lips had yet to cease their exploration of your skin and his hands had a mind of its own, molding your body like clay. Your first orgasm was still fresh on your mind and it had you thinking.

Joker made you cum with just his fingers. You wondered what else he could do, so you whispered your answer into Joker's ear.

"No? Whaddya meannn no? Mmm, if I had ya.. you'd be spoiled rotten. Would ya like that Y/n?"

He emphasized your name with a roll of his hips and your body automatically relaxed to let him in. Joker rocked his hips into yours while sucking on your neck. His dick was constantly rubbing against your folds and the slick sound of it echoed throughout the room. The indirect contact was driving you insane.

Yes was the only word you can say and you repeated it like a mantra.

"Hush, honey bee. I got ya." Joker groaned out loud, causing you to shiver in delight.

He had no business sounding like that and he knew the effect it had on you because he didn't stop. There was no point in being quiet anymore so Joker let all his previous thoughts bubble to the surface.

"F__k, I wanna taste ya! I knooooow you'll taste like honey. Mm my little bee.. always working. Want me to take care of you for a change? You need a break, don'tcha doll?"

He sat up and began fumbling with his belt. You rose to help but Joker smacked your hand away.

"Aht aht, you don't have to do a thing... well maybe just one. Touch yourself. Get nice 'n wet for me." Joker smiled when you licked your fingers and slid them down your body.

You were too quick to action and it jogged Joker's memory to how all of this started.

"Is thaT what you were doing when I came in? Hiding under the covers rubbing one out? Oh you poor poor thing. Does he even try to get you off?"

Your finger stilled on your clit. The answer was written all over your face.

Joker had removed his shirt and slacks but glanced up when you abruptly stopped. It was obvious to him what was going on.

"It's all about him, isn't it? C'mere."

Joker met you halfway and after a moment of hesitation, he kissed you. It was better than what you expected. The bumps and ridges of his scars added a new dimension to the kiss and you couldn't ignore how he tasted.

Smokey yet sugary sweet, it was a combination you could get addicted to and it was evident in the way you dragged Joker down to lie on top of you, wanting more.

He didn't complain and moaned through the kiss as his skin met yours. You were hotter than before and willing to share that warmth as you wrapped your legs around Joker's waist.

Your vision wasn't that great in the dark but you heard Joker reach over and fumble inside your drawer for a condom. You honestly thought he'd go without it due to his nature but he surprised you yet again.

A shame you didn't get to see Joker in the nude. Perhaps he and Batman were alike in that regard: they both kept to the shadows.

"Don't think bout anyyyy thing else mkay? Just.. uh lie back and feel.. f__k! You feel so good!!" In the middle of reassuring you, Joker had begun pushing his cock inside of you.

Your jaw dropped in shock at the overwhelming sensation and with Joker's weight pining you to the mattress, you clawed his back trying to escape.

Joker hissed from the sting, "Take it honey bee, you got it!"

But did you really? Just when you thought you couldn't take any more dick, Joker came to a stop, nestled deep inside of you. The stretch alone took your breath away.

You felt horrible for comparing the two enemies, but Joker was far better.

He pulsed and throbbed within which massaged your inner walls and he kept you buzzing with arousal by kissing and biting your neck.

Joker's hands, now rid of gloves, were like a hot knife cutting through your curves and kneading you into submission. He explored your most sensitive areas and created new ones with ease. Joker had yet to move and you were already nearing your climax.

Was this how sex was supposed to feel? If so, you were hooked.

"J-Joker... please. I-I need you to move, please."

He groaned what sounded like a "Yes ma'am." before pulling out, only to snap right back into place, harder than before.

Your sudden shriek had him smiling in your neck.

"Thereeee ya go doll. That'sss how it's done." He set an even pace, thrusting deep into your pussy to make you feel amazing. A quick glance to his right told him he was doing a thorough job.

Your beautiful smile was everything to Joker. He made you happy, no one else and with that accomplishment, Joker simply let go.

He grabbed onto your hips and never stopped thrusting into you. Even when the bed started to creak or when his grip on you became too tight– he didn't let up. Joker pounded in as deep as possible so all you could think about was dick. It was him making you go crazy stupid, no one else. You were moaning nonsense for only Joker to hear.

And it only fueled him to give it to you harder. "Ahh I'm sorry honey bee, I don't speak slut. What. Was. That?"

You pushed Joker's stomach as tears fell from your eyes.

You were having a sensory overload all thanks to Joker and his soft dom behavior. In one minute he would lick your tears away and the next swear under your breath at how good you were for him. Now he smiled like a wolf, expecting a coherent sentence from you.

Despite his cruel words, you saw the genuine devotion and concern Joker tried to hide. He let go of your hips to cradle your head as his thrusts into your pussy threatened to bang your head against your headboard.

His unnatural green eyes glowed in the darkness and you clung to them like a lifeline.

"I.... I-I think I'm gonna.." You choked out. Joker grinned again and slowed down his brutal pace to agonizing drawl.

"Yeah? You're gonna cum all over my cock? Do it then, doll. It's okay."

He growled when your inner muscles clenched around him. As if it were possible for you to get any tighter. You were killing him. Joker only thought it fair to return the sentiment.

Your eyes rolled back and he laughed before helping you tumble further over the cliff.

"Yeahhhh.... Like that. Just.. like that honey bee. Ah it feels too good doesn't it?" His hips picked up the pace thus prolonging your orgasm against your will. You hoped and prayed that your neighbors weren't home to call the police with how loud you were screaming.

I mean a murder was being committed. Your pussy didn't stand a chance against Joker.

And he was the most cockiest lover you ever bedded.

"Hehe! I bet Batsy doesn't hit it.. ahh, l-like this, huh? Let it all out sweetheart, give into temptation. I got ya. I..." Joker shuddered once before all of his weight fell onto you.

It was welcomed, for his helpless moans in your ear gave you copious amounts of confidence.

He was emptying his load into the rubber but you could feel the intense warmth with each spurt. Your world was hazy but you were slowly coming back down. Joker didn't mind the tight embrace you trapped him in, since he found himself never wanting to leave anyways.

However, duty called. Joker sighed before detaching himself and leaving the bed– and you quickly protested.

"W-Where you go? Don't."

Joker smirked at your jumbled sentence but tossed his used rubber in the wastebasket. While was up, he moseyed on over to your en-suite bath to run some water.

Although he was a psychopath without a soul, aftercare was still important. He doubted Batman offered you that courtesy so he strived to one up his enemy in every way.

You tried sitting up but you found yourself sore and missing Joker's warmth. It wasn't the best logic to have but like an addict, you were fixated on your newfound high and wanted more.

Joker emerged from your bathroom with a washcloth and slapped your thigh to halt your movements.

"Stop moving, ya busy bee. Lemme me take care of you another way hmm?" You nodded warily and it was Joker's cue to begin. He took great care to wipe you clean and finished by leaving a wet kiss below your naval.

You jumped at the silly contact. Joker's mood was so unpredictable, you couldn't keep up. You didn't know what else to say but, "Um t-thanks."

He shrugged as he toed your bee motif night light on. Then you got to see The Joker in all his glory.

His signature green hair was askew in sexy curls, whereas his clown makeup was smudged beyond recognition. You hated to see the mess it left behind on your skin.

He was slipping into his boxers when you propped up on your elbows. "What now?"

Joker tossed you a bemused grin. Bats really did a number on you psychologically.

Did the caped crusader really bust a nut and dip without any proper goodbye? Joker made a note to scold the hero about his manners (or the lack thereof) the next time they butted heads.

But first Joker had to calm your fears. He didn't plan on staying for long but one look into your watery eyes and seeing your pouty lower lip wobble, had him making new plans.

And they all involved including you into his life.

"Now... I'll get ya some water and a uh, snack, so ya don't get de-hy-drate-ed. You.. should use the little ladies room while I ponder if I really wanna kidnap ya or not. After sampling a pussy like that.. d__n, I can't just leave! No, nooo, no.. I thinK.. I want you all. For. Myself. In fact, I think I will. You're mine now."

Joker ended his declaration by kneeling on the bed with his lips brushing up against yours in a mock kiss.

And just like a lawn chair, you folded.

Your eyes fluttered closed assuming that Joker was gonna kiss you properly, but your eyes flew back open when you heard him heading out the bedroom instead.

"Go use the bathroom. I'll be back with some uhh fruit snacks annnnnd for round tw~oooo!!"

Round two? So he was serious just now?! Just what had you gotten yourself into?

#thanks anon!#thanks for the ask!#ledger joker x reader #ledger joker #heath joker #dark knight joker #joker x y/n #joker x reader #reader insert #black!fem!reader #cross posted on ao3 #cross posted on wattpad #romance #unrequited love #joker is down bad for once #his lighthouse

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silvershiningtarot · 1 year

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🥲PAC18+ Your FS Wedding Vows🧁🧁

* Take a deep breath. Inhale and Exhale. These are Five Pile! This reading is about your Husband's wedding Vows to you on y'all Wedding day.❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥but this is also a channeled message from them as well. Enjoy them! Reblog and Comment.❤️‍🔥🔥💋🍒👅 This is a general Reading.

(Clear Throat)

“Where do I begin, sorry I'm a little nervous. Okay, my sweet darling wife. I'm happy that I'm marrying you today. After everything we have been through the ups and downs. Going back and forth. Even when we broke up we still came back to each other. I'm happy to call you my wife. Haha! I'm not laughing because you are my wife, I'm laughing because I remembered a conversation that we had saying you didn't want to get married but look at you now, with your beautiful white dress. I'm so happy for this day today. I know I am a lot but you always say I am worth it. You always give me the courage to stand up for myself. Even when had bad friends in my life, you still stood by my side. However, you can be a bit of a control freak but so am I. I feel that we are meant to be, I mean Duh that's why we are here. It broke my heart when you left me. I never thought you would come back home to me. But I'm glad you did! I know I get on your nerves, and I'm still going to get on your nerve. But that's just me. Haha 😂 you met me this way. I accept you for who you are. I love you so much. You don't even know how much I do. Thank you so much for being honest with me from the beginning we met. I remembered the first time we met, we were working in the studio together. I love how you rap. That shit is Fire 🔥, just like that pussy you be giving. Hahaha! I'm sorry LANGUAGE!! 😂 I'm fucking having a ball right now. I hope I'm making you laugh too. I remember all the stories you shared with me. I'm happy that I can create more memories with you as husband and Wife. May I say… I DO! Let’s go on and forgive the past, old memories, and all the mistakes we had done before we met each other. That was the old me. Here's the new me. We can fly away for our honeymoon together. I know I keep saying thank you but you are the most precious woman/Man in the world to me. I never thought in my life I can say I had found you. After all these years of bullshit with my ex-girlfriend, friends, and the other outsiders, I can say baby we got our victory. I'm about to cry right now. I was in a dark place before meeting you, I'm glad you didn't. I am in love with you. Since the moment I saw you, I guess you can say it was love at first sight. We are match-made in heaven. Allah had blessed me with a gift like you. Because you are the greatest gift that any man could ask for. Our souls together are free. You & I are free! I'm happy to say that we are. Because I never thought in my life I am free. Whenever I'm next to you, I feel the oxygen in my body. I can finally breathe again. As spouses, the universe is with us forever. You open up my chakras. I've become more self-awareness of the people around me and myself. I know you tell me always give myself credit but I had to thank you. Shine your light on me. Now we both can shine our light together. Everyone will need to put on their shades. You're my best friend, my family, and my wife now. I wanna renew our vows until we are in the grave together or flowing in the ocean. Wherever you go, I go too. Hold my hand forever my wife, until death due to our part, I am forever your husband however, I come down here in 3D dimension. I am your husband or wife whatever gender we decide to be in our next life. I am forever yours. (Clear throat) these are my Vows to you. And My kids love you too. I know you had problems of your own but at the end of the day, I will fight for you. My fighting for you will never stop ever. I don't care if I'm an old man I’ll still knock someone tf out period. You are part of my family. Honestly, I don't give a fuck about anyone else besides you and my kids

“ I'm a little nervous, When I first met you it was my greatest blessing from the sky. I know I haven't been the best boyfriend in past years at that time but I promise you I’ll be the best husband, I can ever be. My sweet darling, your face lights up my world all the time. You are such a beautiful soul. You know what when I ask where did you can from? Not literally like a place I mean from the galaxy. You have such an amazing soul. You are a soul. You made me believe in fairytales because at first, I didn't. I never thought in my life my wish had come true💋. You are my true love. I don't care about what's going to happen in the future. Whatever happens, Happens! I love you so much I'm so deeply proud to call you my wife💋🧸. Man, you are so little. You are short but that's okay. I'm your bodyguard, anybody who messed with you, they'll have to go through me. I'll take a bullet for you. I'll die for you no matter what.💋💋🥲. My prayers have been answered. When I bump into you. I felt my heart drop to the floor. I mean seriously it did. When I first lay my eyes on you, I fell deeply in love with you immediately🙈✨💥. I felt an instant connection with you. I couldn't stop for the life of me, get your face out of my head. You are so special to me. When you walk down the aisle, I fucking gasp babe. Gasp 😱. Wearing that cute pink T-shirt and blue jeans short pair pants. You had me turned on. I mean, secretly whispering this shit to you so. I masturbate when I got home by you. 🤤🤤🍑. I’m sorry, I had to tell you that quietly. I know you laughing right now. When I was a child, I wish upon a star for you, like a woman like you. Now here you are. I want to be your superhero. I wanna save your day, every day. If that makes sense. I know you are such a free-spirited person. It took me a minute to catch you but I’m glad you did. You are my home. Welcome home, baby. I know you didn't want a traditional wedding, but I'm glad we can compromise. I truly want to be yours forever. I am meant to be your husband. I wanted to tell you that you are my soulmate. You are my other half, my forever. You are part of my soul tribe. Right? My soul tribe. Haha 😂. You are my soul family. I wanna take pictures with you, give you babies. Keep renewing our vows in 50 years of our marriage 💍. I wanna dance until the sun comes up. I wanna cuddle next to you forever. I don't want anybody else but you. Kissing my chest, touching me, saying grand rising to me. Cooking me breakfast. Even arguing with you. I just want that with you. My Goddess, I fucking worship you. Tell me something, my dear, would you still be here with me today? I know we have other soul contracts with other people. But your problem is my problem. My demons are your demons. I wanna face them with you. I wanna have a new life with you. Like a child, and teenager, all up to my adult old life. Haha 😂 I know I sound hilarious but this day standing with you, I can never forget it. This memory with you is forever in my soul. I'll remember you again, even in our next life I'll remember you. I believe that even in my next life with you, I'll remember our wedding day. The memories we shared when were dating, relationship, and up until now. I want our kids to carry our legacy. My sweet 🧁 how can I ever forget that face of yours? I cried because I was this close to giving up on us. You are still my starlight. I can't wait to grow old with you, even if you outlast me, or I outlast you. I cannot forget this life with you. You are my dream girl. My wife Mrs. I'm happy to call you that. You gave me a whole new perspective on marriage, life, and loving myself. You bring me so much joy and happiness. However, I do want to say Thank you! For Accepting my flaws. Dealing with my life drama, the media, and my past. Some people couldn't handle any reputation but you did. I love you so much, I am going to continue loving you for the rest of my entire life. My favorite hero. Do you know why you are my hero? Is it because you are safe my life? I don't know how you did it but you did it. I love it.”

“You still gave me butterflies in my stomach. I wish that I met you earlier. I know it was divine timing. But you are my blossom🌸 🍒. I'm so dedicated to you.”

“Baby, pick up your glass and say We DID IT! Baby, we fucking made it through. I'm super happy and excited to learn every lesson with you. Even when we have our kids. I faced a lot of battles with you, we went through a lot of ups and down together. I was depressed before I met you. When I saw you I looked at you, I was so happy and excited to be with you. When I saw you. But my chicken ass was scared as fuck. But I love the way you laugh, smile and make fun of each other. When I first kiss you, it was a match made from heaven for you. My god, I wanted to scream out to the world and say MY WIFE KISS ME!! (laugh) I know right. Laugh it's okay. I love you. Make me feel so godamn special. How you are not amazing. I mean when I see you that day sipping that coffee. In my mind, I was like I gotta talk to you before I missed my chance. I'm glad I did talk to you. Because you're my wife now. Even before you say I Do you were still my wife. I recognize your face before. It was like damn did you incarnate yourself for me? Like just for me! I am the luckiest man/woman on this earth. My greatest gift was you being my wife. On our wedding day. I remember when I was overly possessive over you. Still am! Don't you forget it? I wanna keep getting you pregnant over, and over again. Maybe about 4 or 7 kids I wanna have with you. If that's okay with you my love. You help me through my nightmares. I used to wake up screaming in the middle of the night. You kiss my forehead telling me it's okay. I felt super safe. You are my Safe-haven. God! I'm just so excited. I’m crying right now. I'm sorry💦, for getting emotional. You make me cry all the time. In a good way, you do. Wow, you gave me your virginity. I felt like the proudest man/woman. You know all of my secrets, secrets I haven't told anyone about. Only you. You're my cupid. My darling, you help me forgive my family, my friends, and shit even my coworkers you did that. I don't care if it sounds like I'm giving you way much credit. But yes! I am. I am your husband. I have always been your husband. No matter what. ❤️💋🫦For some reason I wanna go between your legs and start. (clear throat) I'll say that on the honeymoon. You make me feel so special. I can't describe or explain how special you make me feel. I don't feel like a superhero but I feel like a villain that wants to do the right thing but still fucked shit up. 🤣 I remembered the argument we had you had called out my bullshit. I mean fuck! At first of course, I was very defensive. You are strong. I mean you are a strong-head woman/man. I never thought that anyone could accept me for who I am. I've grown up to be the man I want to be for you. My precious star ✨✨✨. You shine so brightly with me. I like that. That doesn't mean you can't shine on your own. I love it when we shine together. I love that you keep your individuality. You are so original. God! You are so fucking smart. I mean you are such a fucking genius. Look how incredible you are. When you walk down this aisle, I was like yes! My perfect match is here with me. I know you were scared 😱to marry me. But I'm glad I change your mind. I was wondering if you are interested in renewing our vows again. About 40 years or 10 years into our marriage. I know you always say future changes but I don't care, I honestly feel like I've been married to you. When you told me you were in a relationship with someone else I was pissed off. I was like who tf is this dude/ girl touching my wife/husband? I'll knock his fucking head on his body. But I kept it together. I did it, in a gentlemanly way by being polite. So I'm proud of myself. Will you still give me more than one kid? I love seeing you pregnant. Even now I do. I got your name tatted on me. Do you know what's so crazy, the funny thing is people always talk shit about us. But LOOK AT US!! Hahaha!! My baby or should I say, my babies. I'll always protect you. Always and forever. You are my champion. I'll never forget that. NEVER! I love you. I wanna build a whole life with you. My baby 👶🏾, it is like you are my first kiss.”

(Chuckle 🤭)

“Wow, you still make me blush 🤭☺️. I'm blushing right now. It's like I'm back in high school. Staring at my crush. My hero. You complete me from the moment you came into my life It was like a breath of fresh air for me💨. I mean do you get that? I'm not trying to be disrespectful. You see how much you mean to me. You change my world upside down. It was like a big whole transformation you did for me.💥it was like a big earthquake🙀you shock my world up. Should I say you shake my world🌍. I'm glad you did. I saw people fall off like fucking flies baby. Wow, thank you for giving me clarity. ☺️You had opened my eyes 👀. I had a spiritual awakening. I never thought I had known so much of the truth about my life. I had a major breakdown, crying in the middle of the night. You were there holding me. Telling me to purge my tears. For days I was in a dark place but you help me. I just want to say thank you. I know we going to trigger each other, even now we do. But I'm not worrying about that. I feel like I am the happiest man on earth. Fuck yeah, I am. I told you that you complete me. I've prayed for you, even when I didn't know you. I still prayed for you. I know you say that I helped open up more but the truth is we helped each other. (crying) I'm so fucking happy that you are my partner. Not like partners in crime. Like my actual partner. You standing beside me. I know that you're my ride or die. Look at your belly. It getting big that's the family that we created together. I wanna design our baby's bedroom together. I wanna design our bedroom together. I feel so happy. I know that this might sound like a fucking dickhead move but I don't care. You are better than all the past exes that were in my life. What I mean by that is I wished I didn't learn from them. Because I had got hurt. I had awakened you and you had awakened me. I was very scared for a second, I had run away from you. Again I won't do that anymore. I know I did that before when were dating and I made some mistakes in the past. I'm glad you forgive me for them. So do I. You told me not to feel guilty about it. Look how amazing you look. My zing! I know I feel like Johnny from Hotel Transylvania. Other people were like Dracula trying to separate us. But I’m glad we don't have to worry about other people's problems anymore. I won't go any further than this but I wanna say. I hope in the next life together you're my wife there. We meet quicker this time (laugh) 😂. Plenty of people call me delusional and fake and fucking disgusting names but I didn't believe them. Because who the fuck is they. I'm glad you told me nobody else runs my life but me. I know I get down hard on myself. Because I forget sometimes for being human. But I have you bring me back down to reality. You are the most important part of my life. You are the most important part of my kid's life. My nieces are my kids. You are welcome to my life. That's crazy that you had welcome me into your life. It was amazing🌍. I had manifested you, it was like bam💥 I had wished upon a star 💫💫 then a shooting star flew across the moon. I saw that it was you. You Flew across the moon. My angel. My precious angel 😇. You are an angel who fell from heaven, come to save me. Emotionally, mentally and spiritually. You are very special to me. You are so loving. I learned how to balance my emotions and my business life. Sometimes I get too personal. But you are here to help me and keep me on track. Thank you so much. My hero. MY FUCKING HERO! You save me, baby. I wished that you came earlier but I know wasn't in the right head at that time. You probably would've left me. In the beginning, I would've been a dickhead about it but in reality, I would've understood. Anyways sorry for this long ass speech but my baby thank you for saving me. Again you complete me. My hero, my special hero I'll be your hero and your magician. I'll cast some spells on you. I love you, my wife. I'm hearing a song in my head I would like to sing to you real quick.” (Clear Throat)

“I told you when I met girl, I would need patience, you said you understood so I thought you could take it. We have a really good thing, nothing should come between us. I'm not telling you to wait, I'm not telling you to wait on me.”

“That's a song I wanna sing to you. I love you. I'm not telling you to wait but I'm glad you waited for me. Took me a minute but I got it haha 😂. You are my hero, my star shines on you. I looked up at the sky and go on my knees and pray for you. You are such a heaven of above. Again my nieces love you so much. You help me so much. You are my good luck charm. I wanna sing another song to you again. May I?”

“I got so much love for you in these arms, don’t you know your my good luck charm. You and me forever girl in these arms. Don't know you are my good luck charm.”

“ My diamond 💎💍, you fix my broken heart💔. You did. I'm glad for your help. I love your energy, smile, and your aura I know that sounds the same but you know me I like to be colorful with my shit. Haha 😂 my wife. Our day is very important to me. I'm glad there's no other man other than you but me. There's no other woman than you. You are the only one for me. Me only. I don't care if that sounds selfish, possessive, or clingy I don't care, you had met me this way. 💋 You amazed me every time I looked at you I feel free. I feel like a new me again. I wanna sing a song to you. “When I look at you, I see forgiveness. I see the truth, you loved me for who I am Like the stars hold the moon. Right here we belong and I know I'm not alone.” That's the song I wanna sing to you on our wedding day. I know it was embarrassing. I know I'm not much of a singer but hey I hope you still like it. I will always try to impress you. I've always tried to impress you. I mean come on you’re my favorite person in the more. You are my twin flame I never knew what that means until I felt you before in my dreams. I kiss you in my dreams and almost had sex with you in my dreams. I mean I do have sex with you but then after that, It disappears. I have a breeding kink. I wanna keep getting you pregnant over and over again. I feel so amazing. I want you to carry my son. I wanna have a lot of boys with you. I know I have other kids on the side. Woah, that sounded dickheadish but that's not my intention. But I want a boy so I can take them everywhere and fucking check on his attitude and wear matching outfits with him. Listening to music in the car. I know our son isn't here yet but I still want to make him inside of you. You are my wish fulfillment. I know people think that you are a dominant woman but that's okay I like it when you dominate me. But anyways I don't wanna get too sexual. I fall so deeply when you walk down the aisle. In that beautiful white dress. You are so pure, and innocent. Like my angel. All I saw was you. Nobody else in the room but you. For sure I was nervous asking you to marry me. When I first propose to you, I was yikes maybe I should put the ring back but fuck it I already bought it. Haha. You know what I mean. Anyways for all the past pain we had gone through. I fuck babe it was hell. All the inference was just a fucking headache. I mean GODDAMN!! I was like can we catch a fucking break! Geez! But sorry no need to go down memory lane real quick. I love you so much, baby. You are my favorite person in the world to me. You made me feel what happiness feels like. Give you all the kisses in the world. Your soul and mines are the same. You and I are Twin Flames. I know keep saying that but we are. As your husband, I married my soulmate and my other half. My precious diamond 💎💎🌍. You were so hard to find but I'm glad that I found you, took me a long time to search for you but I did. I fucking did. Again we came a long way but I'm glad we went through the ups and down together. Everybody was saying too clingy to you, possessive, and overly protective but I don't care you are my diamond. My cupcake. I never felt this happy. Of course, my kids make me happy but you as my romantic partner make me so happy and fulfilled like wow my special queen. My angel blesses me every time. I have a song for you. I wanna sing it to you so May I?

“My whole life has changed since you came in. You were that special one, I'm so in love so deep in love. You made my life complete. You are so sweet.”

“That's my song to you. I know we pick our song together. But I just wanted to sing to you. I love you so much. I know I keep going on and on with the speech but I'm glad you are here with me today as my wife. You are the best person in the world to me. Thank you for opening me up. 💋💋💋”

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