#i included some bonus mentions bc i liked them

[ambreiiigns]

i'm tired of drawing generic ghouls. we are moving on to designing the specific band ghouls. who's shitting their pants in excitement abt it (me)

[vaguenotions]

Oh, yes, I just love your unannounced sleepover where you both come back from the bar after carefully avoiding telling me that's where you were going, and also neglecting to tell me when you'd be home! I definitely do not want to knock you on your ass and take a bat to your dome! That would be rude and unnecessary :)

Oh yes, please do start talking about shit amongst yourselves and make me feel isolated and othered in ny own room! These moments are what I live for, of course. Naturally. Who would ever have any issues with this arrangement at all?

[squish--squash]

shittens...

lore and bonus art under the cut

(before I really start the lore I just wanna mention these two hatched from eggs. I have my own speculative biology hcs about cotl that keeps the canonical eggs bc I'm crazy. I'd infodump about it but I'm not sure how my followers would feel about me talking about the reproduction about a fictional group of anthros LSDHGS-)

anyways. Beleth (she/her): the younger twin, second to hatch. she was actually the first shitten I designed, she's got at least two prior attempts at a design before I really settled on her current design. She has two sets of ears and no horns, and her body plan is more of a sheep, except her arms are more cat-like with paws. as a kid, Beleth's pretty energetic and loves to run around, and talking to everyone she sees. very friendly and social. also chaotic at times and causes mischief. Unlike the Lamb, who shears often due to crusading, Beleth rarely shears herself, and keeps extra wool that grows on her head out of her face by pulling it back into a poofy ponytail (it's also a couple shades darker than the lamb). She also always has two bells on her- the bells her and her sister wore when they were babies

Erinyes (she/they): the older twin, first to hatch. her design just popped into existence without me thinking that hard about it, and I'm ngl she's my fav shitten of the two LSHDLGHDS. Her face and body are catlike, but there's some sheep features, like the ears, horns, and hoofed hands. She only has wool on her head, and it's black; as a kid, she hardly sheared it, but as an adult she keeps it a bit shorter, shearing off pieces that get too long. They're not nearly as talkative as Beleth, but they're very fast and graceful. She had a habit of climbing the trees on the edge of the cult ground for some piece and quiet and Narinder would keep having to climb up after her to get her down. When her wool is longer but not longer enough to shear, she keeps the wool out of her face by tying it off to the side in two sections. They're a bit taller and slimmer than Beleth, even as adults

speaking of adults, this is a quick sketch of them when they're fully grown (they're immortal like their parents, and stopped aging once they reached adulthood - which took quite a bit longer lol)

as adults, Beleth because the head nurse of the healers, being apprenticed by the former head nurse (who had been with them both since childhood, her skull necklace prolonging her life); Erinyes becomes the head of missionaries, teaching newbies, organizing supplies to take and where to go, unloading the hauls, and sometimes even joining on missions herself. Their outfits are different as well: Beleth keeps the bells, but replaces the garment she wore as a kid with a pleated skirt, the bells attaching to the thick belt she wears; Erinyes wears a cloak like the Lamb, with an undergarment covering her body (this is mainly to protect herself from the elements when she's outside the cult)

anyways, here's a bonus: I made some wives for the sisters lol

Mabre (she/her): strong, suave, and part of the missionaries. after she was indoctrinated from Anura she was placed to be a missionary; her ass was not listening for the first day bc she was too busy staring at her new boss gayly. gets quite a few scars from her work (including a ripped ear) but she enjoys the work, and doesn't mind. It takes a while for Erinyes to realize their feelings and it's only after Mabre almost dies that she realizes, and promptly pulls a Narinder by ignoring said feelings until Mabre finally makes a move

Hetry (he/she): shy and polite worshipper taken in from Darkwood, was pined after immediately by a certain shitten. They didn't actually talk tho until a prank gone wrong via Leshy resulted in Hetry breaking her leg, and he developed an instant crush upon watching Beleth chew her own uncle out within an inch of his life. enjoys the pleasantries of life and the simplicity of her work. there's a lot of mutual pining until the two finally get together (Erinyes would tease Beleth about it, and then gets a taste of her own medicine after Mabre's indoctrinated)

(they both wear golden skull necklaces for obvious reasons, but Mabre also wears a missionary necklace, while Hetry wears a nature necklace intertwined with his golden skull necklace; they also become disciples eventually, Hetry through her worshipper status and Mabre by constant feats of effort and strength to support the cult)

[nosferatu-png]

Hello! You ship Zephrit right?? I’m genuinely curious as to how this ship came to be, I’ve been digging around and seeing some great art (including yours omg I love your art) is there like concert footage of Ifrit and Zephyr? (Bc Terzomega there is lots of on stage footage and stuff) Anyways, I would love if you could tell me more about zephrit!!

EEE I would love to talk about it!! I'm not sure the exact origins of it so I'm definitely gonna ramble a little (a lot) - but they did have a lot of fun things on stage together!

I do think part of it is just the overall closeness of the Popestar lineup, at least in my opinion. It definitely feels like a lot of other ships along the lines of "these two interacted and have a good energy together and I think they should kiss about it" HAHAHA

But honestly, Ifrit played around so much with everyone and did NOT let Zephyr fade into the background and I really do love that, especially when it's so hard to find good clips of keyboardists.. and Zeph was so lively, it helped that Ifrit was Right There for them to goof around with

Another factor might be that Ifrit and Zephyr were the only two ghouls who didn't move on in the lineup (aside from Ivy, who of course is nor mentioned enough because of how briefly he was there). We got to see Aether, Dew, and Mountain's relationships all evolve together while Zephyr and Ifrit are a little seperate from that, only being there for the year.

And bonus chronic pain/fatigue ghoul X excited heat pack ghoul

Digging in my Zeph Stash but I'm sure I have more and better stage moments hidden somewhere ^^ I am always willing to talk about anything Popestar ghouls, especially Zephyr related!! They're just a bit more difficult to find because there's really only so much recordings online from the era, especially ones that focus on anyone else *but* Terzo

(ALSO I'M SO GLAD U ENJOY MY LIL DOODLES💗🦇💗🦇💗)

‼️FLASH WARNING FOR THE GIF UNDER THE CUT‼️

[jinkicake]

Sharing is Caring

Zhongli/Xiao x Reader, Pierro/Signora x Reader

A/N: I got eager to post this so... I did. Also, I included a bonus (short) idea of a threesome w pierro and signora bc i want them both so :-) anyway xiao zhongli train when? I want to be at the station early. 

I had to mention zhonglis ‘supposed’ double cock….. what do we think abt it? I kinda like zhongli and monsterfuck-

WC - 1.4k 

SMUT // NSFW 

~~~

A threesome with Zhongli and Xiao can go so many different ways. Zhongli might be the one dominating you and controlling every move of your body or he might sit back and let Xiao take over. The geo archon will sit patiently and wait for the adeptus to finish ruining you before he takes his turn and slams you with the final nail in your coffin. 

((basically xiao breeds reader and then zhongli fucks the reader teeeheee))

“Take it,” Xiao’s entire room is filled with his heavy pants and snarls, ricocheting off the walls and causing the furniture to shake. Your own light noises are drowned out by the slam of the headboard against the wall and each grunt that leave his lips as he thrusts into you. On your side, you are spayed out across the yaksha’s mattress and getting pounded as if he is taking thousands of years of frustration out on you. You can barely focus, your vision is going blurry as the pain of his fingernails digging into your thighs makes the pleasure you’re feeling soar even higher.  

With each gentle pant falling from your lips, your chest rises and falls. Tears line your lashes and you can barely see from being fucked stupid by the adeptus. 

You almost forget that you have an audience until Zhongli’s soft chuckle captures your attention. Almost pitifully, you glance over at where he sits in the fancy chair. He sits comfortably, legs spread wide while watching your every reaction. The anticipation in his features almost makes you feel nervous about what he is going to do when Xiao is done with you. The Archon appears calm with his blank expression but, you know better. He is gripping the armrests to hold himself back from taking you. 

Xiao’s impending release comes quicker than expected and is signaled by the whines leaving his throat. You watch as his hair falls matted against his forehead, damp with sweat while he thrusts into you one final time. He grips your legs tightly and presses his entire body into you, cock reaching incredibly deep that you swear you can feel him in your lungs. The feeling of his cum filling you up, spilling past your cunt, and covering your thighs makes you twitch. Ultimately, it’s the tight rub circles he rubs on your clit with his thumb that finishes you off. 

The adeptus had plans to calm you down, to work you through your orgasm but before he even gets the chance, his old friend steps in. 

Zhongli places a firm hand on his shoulder, cupping the joint before bowing his head and brushing his lips against the adeptus’ ear. 

“Good job,” He murmurs and it’s a praise that makes Xiao scoff. The yaksha ignores the older man to press a tight kiss on your lips, holding your chin to keep you in place before pushing you back against the sheets. Almost incredibly slowly, he pulls his limp cock out of your cunt. The squeeze of your walls feels like a punch to the gut and he gasps for air at the feeling. 

Before you know it, the positions have switched and it’s Zhongli above you as Xiao plops himself down in the fancy armchair.  

“Beautiful,” Zhongli whispers as he runs his fingers along your jaw, gazing down at you as if you were the one who created the divine scenery of Liyue. He holds you carefully, gently placing you on your back and spreading your thighs apart with a touch that brings tears to your eyes. 

He lightly drags his fingers along your slit, scooping up some of the yaksha’s cum before bringing it to your mouth. Zhongli doesn’t have to ask you of anything as you obediently part your lips and allow him to place his fingers on your tongue. You suck dutifully around the digits while the Archon works his way out of his confined slacks. 

It’s almost embarrassing how nude you are compared to him being fully clothed but, he prefers it this way. And it would be a lie to say you didn’t enjoy it. 

Zhongli continues to touch you with his gentle fingers from cupping your sides to tracing the underside of your breasts. The feeling nearly distracts you from the two cockheads ghosting over your clit. 

“Zhongli,” You choke on air as you try to suck in a deep breath, the firm nudge against your sensitive bud nearly causes you to cry out. Next to you, Xiao watches silently. He lets his eyes run over your sweaty body, bruised by his lips and touch. It’s a sight he engraves into his memory. However, he can’t help but shift his hips in anticipation of how you’re going to react taking his god’s cocks. 

“Breathe,” The Geo Archon murmurs as he guides his lengths to your cunt, he watches you carefully at the first slip-in. Your squeak warms his heart and fills his entire body with a burning desire. He doesn’t take his eyes off of you as he squeezes the second one in and once they’re both situated, he waits. Zhongli pats your head and gently smiles down at you. He never imagined a human would be strong enough to take him like this. “you’re doing well.” 

When you finally start to squirm again, he slowly protrudes deeper inside of you. He grunts at the sight of your cunt squeezing around him so selfishly, at Xiao’s cum still painting your thighs and now creating shadows on his cocks. Zhongli thrusts himself to fit the rest of the way in, pressing flush against the back of your thighs as his chest begins to rise and fall with heavy breaths. 

The string of patience in him has now snapped, you can see it in the glow of his amber eyes and the deep growl of his voice. 

“I’m not going to stop anytime soon, traveler.”

But also like threesome with pierro and signora??? [fem!reader word vomit]

“Aren’t we supposed to be sharing?” Signora sighs dramatically from where she lays on the table, eyes intently watching where your body connects with the older man’s. “Jester?” 

Pierro’s eyes snap up to look at the other harbinger, maintaining eye contact until Signora gets bored and looks away. His cool eyes slightly narrow before going back to stare at your arched chest in the air. He greedily takes in the sight, planting his palm on your stomach before sucking long and hard on your clit. 

The friction is released with a soft ‘pop’ when he finally removes his mouth from your cunt, choosing to sit up now and face the other woman. 

“We agreed that you could watch,” Pierro’s commanding voice leaves no room for argument and the mere deepness of the rich sound causes you to shiver. The coldness of the room nor Signoria’s fingers pinching and toying with your nipple do little to help your case. The Jester’s eyes glare towards Signora’s fingers and his own dig into your hip selfishly. “not that you could touch.”

“But look how much she enjoys it,” Signora taunts as she leans forward, her breath hovering over your bare skin before pressing a kiss to the underside of your breast. “we both want to make her cum. Let’s work together,” Your chest flares with something forbidden at the way Signora doesn’t even acknowledge you. She stares back at the first harbinger, a soft smirk on her lips as she awaits his answer. Pierro stands up from between your legs and leaves the space wide open for the other woman. 

“Do not kiss her.” He cups your throat with his palm, watching Signora closely as the woman hums and places a peck on your inner thigh. 

“She’s all yours,” Signora murmurs against your skin before running her nose incredibly close to your bare cunt. Pierro scoffs lightly, remaining unphased as he moves his fingers to capture your chin. The older man forces you to look up at him and his cold demeanor almost makes you shake. You can only watch as he lowers his face, lips brushing against your ear. His thumb slightly presses underneath the corner of your jaw. 

“This is what you wanted,” Pierro murmurs, eyes softening slightly as you look at him. He can’t help himself, not with you looking so helpless for him. His heart yearns for your touch and he eagerly slots his lips over your own. 

At the same time, Signora finally places her mouth on your cunt with a gentle kitten lick. 

The collision of the two forces makes you moan so loudly that the walls of the empty meeting hall nearly start to shake. 

[sitp-recs]

top 5 rare pairs? :)

Hi lovely, thank you so much! As you know I love babbling about these, kind feel bad that I didn’t include any femslash but I wanted to keep this short and include some sneaky recs as always :D hope that’s ok, would love to see your picks too!

1. HARRY/TEDDY MY BELOVED, sometimes I feel like I love them as much as Drarry as my adoration for Teddy Lupin (and Harry’s too, I’m sure) goes beyond this life, and the next. as always a big shoutout to @lqtraintracks for single-handedly seducing me into this ship back in 2012, thank you for your service 🫡

2. Harry/Ron, things like this fic by @writcraft and this post suggest that friends to lovers might be in fact the ultimate trope. it took me so long to get into the idea of them as a romantic ship, and even longer to start reading it because I’m picky af, but after I did they started living rent free in my head and there’s no way back. rip liv 🤡

3. Harry/Ron/Draco because I really wanted to include a triad, also a bit picky about them but @tackytigerfic’s foundational Aim For My Heart punched me in the solar plexus with feelings (ugh!!!), and I can’t really resist the pull now that @dronarryfest exists. I’ll take this chance to also mention my love for Dron which has superb fics like this and this, a really fun and refreshing ship with its own brand of humor and angst.

4. Harry/Sirius, look I’m a simple woman with simple fandom needs and age gap covers most of them lol I don’t read it very often but I ache for the angst potential of those hotdirtywrong vibes & delicious want x guilt moral dilemma that our Sirry champion @lqtraintracks explores so well. orrr we can go the hot & sweet route and still get ruined by tender wall sex, how dare you @maesterchill

5. Draco/Albus Severus is on this list solely bc of birdsofshore’s invaluable contribution including my all-time favorite pwp, and also my pal @sweet-s0rr0w who gifted me this breathtaking T-rated gem, how lucky am I!!!

Bonus: special mention to Sirius/Draco which I hadn’t considered before being slapped in the face by this gem by @ruinsplume and this gem by one @citrusses you might have heard of her 😌

ask me my top 5/10 anything!

[sad-scarred-sassy]

Genuine question but if elain and azriel weren’t going to have some romantic relationship, why did SJM even write that first half of the bonus chapter? Elucien are already mates, she could’ve written a scene with them or not mentioned azriel and elain at all.

I’m not saying that gwynriel half of the bonus chapter was meaningless, they DID have good banter and the language used was eyebrow-raising at the very least, like something is def hinted there but I’m just confused about it. Like if she’s going in gwynriel direction, she could’ve JUST written the second half of the scene. We didn’t even KNOW elain and azriel were interacting before. Like why write a scene with Az + elain and then wreck them in the same chapter?

It’s so weird?? It could’ve easily been a set up for elucien and gwynriel but now it looks more like she was setting up for a love triangle between Az Gwyn and Elain.

I don’t know what to make of this 🤷🏻‍♀️ it just felt unnecessary lol bc if the next book IS azriel, I really don’t think she is going to have him move on from Mor to Elain, then Elain to Gwyn over the course of one chapter that didn’t even make it in the book?

It makes me so annoyed to think about that stupid BC. She should’ve never released it bc whether it’s gwynriel or elriel, that bonus chapter doesn’t make sense.

Like yeah yeah, we see how toxic elriel could’ve been and we see how they would never work - but like… tbh I didn’t think anything was happening between elain and azriel UNTIL the bonus chapter. I literally read that and was like HUH when did they—??? And then he was like “this was a mistake” and they went their separate ways and he ended the chapter with Gwyn. If SJM is going for Gwynriel endgame, it would’ve been so much better if she just didn’t even include the first part of the bonus chapter?? And vice versa.

If she hadn’t written the first part, I wouldn’t think elriel was a thing. If she hadn’t written the second part I wouldn’t think gwynriel was a thing.

I don’t think she did it just for drama either so I literally dunno what purpose it serves.

Hey!! That’s a great question, let me dive into it…

I think the bonus chapter has three parts, one with Elain, one with Rhys, one with Gwyn, not only to cement Gwynriel but also to give an end to Elriel. This also while deep diving into Azriel’s thoughts and motivations.

I for one, never really considered Elriel as strongly as their shippers do, but I could tell there was something going on there, in Acowar we got some winks at Elain being comfortable with Azriel (even if kind of in a childish, innocent way) and in Acofas we got the beginning of them acting awkward with eachother, Elain showing Azriel her plans etc, I remember thinking it was at best cute and Elain obviously had a crush on Az (but he was still pretty much still hung up with Mor and she was still mourning her fiance). When I read the BC I was so shocked and uncomfortable with Azriel’s purely sexual thoughts about Elain, it was deliberate, to show the reader Azriel is probably confusing lust with romantic feelings. That’s I think why you say the BC was the first time you saw them as a couple, but this shock to me was more in the way Azriel himself actually viewed Elain, until then we all at least agreed it was in a more tender way, and this was absolutely crushed with his pov (and we actually see this tenderness in the way he thinks about Gwyn instead).

Now to your main question: Why add Elain in his chapter? And to that we first need to answer why SJM wrote Elriel at all.

As an Elucien I can’t come here and say Elriel never existed because it did, but the reason SJM wrote it is not to lead them as endgame, but to add layers and tension to these characters. Firstly, Elriel for me was there to add some will-they-won’t-they to Elucien’s mating bond. Look, with no other couple did we have a mating bond snapped and proclaimed even before the two characters even spoke to each-other. This the first time we have this scenario, and things need to go one way for the tension to be there.

If Elain was just mourning Graysen (which relationship was ended in the same book Elucien gained traction) then it would have been too given that they would inevitably find their way to eachother. So she adds Azriel to the mix, who at that point had only ever been interested in Mor for 500 years, with absolutely zero possibility of her ever mirroring his interest. It just makes sense for his character to also find that fixation on Elain, another unattainable female. This was another way Azriel continued his self sabotage behavior, and so we had the first real stepping stone into what his character arc will be when he gets his book.

But we can agree Elriel started (to act as a red herring for Elucien, add character tension, give Az an arc), gained traction in Acofas, and when Sarah introduced us to Gwyn and had the realization she was perfect for Azriel, she had to close the Elriel thread. So here comes the BC.

As readers we needed to see with our own eyes why exactly these two characters weren’t good together, just like she did this with Tamlin in a more dramatic way before Feyre could see Rhys in a romantic way, Sarah gave us all the clues in the way Azriel thought about Elain hyper sexually, how he called their encounter a mistake, how he focused too much in her mating bond, even in ACOSF we got winks of him limiting Elain when she clearly wanted to help, because she should not be exposed to darkness. Then comes Rhys, asking Azriel the questions we as readers were asking him: what about Mor? No answer. Do you think you deserve Elain? Diverting the answer to say Lucien doesn’t (showing us his possible insecurity towards him). And then we have the Gwyn part, in which we see Azriel’s character actually shine, even if he still can’t see this is actually the way, not the doomed self sabotage relationship he was entertaining with Elain.

The thing is it IS a set up for Elucien and Gwynriel:

Elucien: Lucien was there in the same house when the almost kiss happened, this is a calculated thing, the chapter could have happened a day after and it would have worked perfectly, but no, Lucien was there too. Something tells me Lucien knows what transpired, he probably could feel it, hear it, smell it or at least have some perception of it. And this just adds more angst to what Elain and him are going to go through.

Gwynriel: the obvious banter, exact opposite of Azriel’s and Elain’s interaction (for the better), and the hints of their potential mating bond.

To sum it up, Elriel was a thing before the bonus chapter, thats for sure, but Sarah needed to end it before she could continue, however small and insignificant their relationship actually was. And I don’t agree that this set up a love triangle between Elain/Az/Gwyn, when Azriel said “this was a mistake” Sarah ended any possibility of that, Elain gave him back the necklace she was at first eager to receive, Lucien was there and probably knows something happened, Azriel thought he had been right to stay away, and it ended with him thinking about Gwyn’s glowing eyes and smiling about her.

I hope this answers your question, I actually think the bonus chapter was masterfully written to tell us everything we need to know about what was actually happening inside Azriels head, and give us a hint of his future and the future of the other characters.

If she hadn’t written the first part, then we could’ve never gotten those rich pieces of information into Azriel’s trauma, red flags, jealousy and thought process that will play a part in his own book (because they’re far from resolved). By having both we could see how Elain brings up the worse in him, while Gwyn calms the restlessness inside of him instantly.

[wuxia-hero]

HELLO coming out of my cave to yell about how much I LOVE The Double (墨雨云间) bc I have no irl friends that love historical c-dramas :’) I’ve been hung up on this show for a few days after finishing it.

Overall 10/10 with a subjectively happy ending (I choose to believe the ending is happy) with really good acting. Wu Jinyan could never disappoint. The frontal camera angles threw me off quite a bit at first but I slowly started to appreciate this artistic choice.

Some spoilers ahead as usual!

Let’s dive into - the Plot. I read some of the original novel in the past but dropped it after a while. There are some differences - such as the novel using transmigration (Xue Fangfei entering Jiang Li’s body) as the main plot point, while the drama explicitly shows how Xue Fangfei’s journey with Jiang Li and how she eventually took over JL’s identity after her passing. Personally I prefer what the drama did as everything felt much more real and believable. This added a depth to the story that transmigration was unable to showcase. Plus, Wu Jinyan’s ability to showcase XFF’s pain and growth as she vows to exonerate JL (played by Yang Chaoyue) and herself was extremely captivating and I constantly wanted to root for her.

All the flashbacks with JL thanking XFF throughout the show had me sobbing in bed at 3am while watching.

Special mention to the king (played by Zeng Ke Liang) as well for not being a total fool - as seen in SO MANY other historical dramas. His friendship with Xiao Heng is rock solid, and seeing the ministers and other antagonists constantly underestimate it was sooo satisfying to watch. So if you hate cdramas with stupid monarchs, you'll be pleased to hear that there won't be any of that here.

Scenes of their friendship were really cute to watch too.

The romantic development between XFF and Xiao Heng (played by Wang Xingyue) was delightful to watch. I love couples that just understand each other. Without explicitly saying anything, without any grand confessions of love, both parties mutually knew each other’s feelings and constantly looked out for each other. The slow and gradual process of them falling for each other was paced out beautifully - XH’s gaze changes as he looks at her throughout the episodes, and XFF gets more and more playful around him. The script and their bantering ticks all the right boxes fkr me. He’s the only person that knows her real identity, she doesn’t need to hide in front of him. And this makes their relationship so much more special.

And I love that there was nothing like making stupid decisions in the name of love and protection while jeopardising the bigger picture. (eg. XH giving up the entire secret army the emperor trusted him with for XFF - turning out to be a hidden ploy) Both XFF and XH were on a quest for revenge and they are determined to get what they want without making any compromise. If at any point of the plot - they deviate from this and decide to do something foolish in order to protect the other, I would have seen it as out of character.

Bonus points for including an archery scene :D It’s one of my favourite overused tropes.

The overall camera work and style of The Double was shot so beautifully and in a rather interesting theatrical style. From JL’s death where she falls among the pear blossoms to Princess Wanning (played by Li Meng) ’s dancing and even the scenes where characters stare directly into the camera. The opening scenes were super dramatic and really set a heavy tone for the rest of the story.

While the staring into the camera took some getting used to, there are certain portions where Wanning’s expressions gave me goose bumps. Li Meng’s performance took me out - her Wanning was repulsive in the way she treated others, yet so broken from her past that I felt so much pain for her towards the end of the story. It was amazing.

There were even comedic elements that made some parts feel like a stage play. Like her cousin and his lackeys’ coordinated walk as they try to help her out from her room. And one of the minister’s love for theatre which was super on the nose I laughed out loud while watching it all play out. The style in which important plot points are presented is so unique and really sets this show apart from other cdramas I’ve watched.

Everyone in the cast was amazing in their roles. While Wang Xingyue is one of the younger cast members, the emotional depth in his performance as Xiao Heng gave off maturity and a temperament beyond his years. Seeing him goof around behind the scenes, and then watching him as Xiao Heng gave me whiplash - but in the best way possible.

Liang Yongqi was a truly despicable Shen Yurong - it got to a point where seeing him on screen made my skin crawl. Liu Xiening as Jiang Ruoyan was perfectly annoying - and I can't wait to see more from her as I've really liked her since she was in Gugudan.

I could probably go on and on about how much I love Wu Jinyan as Xue Fangfei and I’m so happy that they casted her because she was perfect. (Admittedly, I’m biased). But I think you can watch the show to experience everyone's brilliance for yourself. The casting and script pacing was great and all the different pieces fit together into this story perfectly.

Now let's talk about the somewhat controversial ending of The Double. Did our beloved Duke Su die in battle? Did they ever reunite? I choose to believe that he came back to her in the end and they got their happy ending. But Wang Xingyue's performance in that last battle - with the iconic scene of XFF's pendant in his mouth was breathtaking. Regardless, I do think the show could have done without causing the audience pain with this added arc of him going back to his duties - but I felt that it made sense.

Xiao Heng is someone who is deadly loyal to his country and to his king. He and XFF are not the kind to simply escape from the capital and its intrigues to live a happy life on their own. Both value their family and their country, they would never leave the capital to pursue their own happiness.

Also something I noticed - that made this scene so much more painful. At the start after XFF retrieves the pendant, Tong'er (her servant) tells her not to pawn off this pendant anymore. She replies with "there's no one worth trading this pendant for". And then she gives this pendant to XH before he goes off to battle at the end. Cries.

Abrupt end but I think this is most of the feels I have to get out already - I took a lot of screenshots and recordings while watching The Double (haven't felt the urge to do so in such a long time tbh) so there may be more posts from me while I continue yapping about how much I love this show and story adaptation.

smol life update: I’ve been working FT after graduation two years ago - but I was in a pretty bad environment and have decided to resign this year. So now I’m funemployed and trying to work through some health issues. Hope everyone has been well and thank you for reading this! ❤️❤️

[wrishwrosh]

re: tags on labor in historical fiction post, would be very interested to hear what the four examples you mentioned are!!

ok u know what that tag WAS bait, thank you for taking it. technically speaking these aren't works dealing strictly with labor in historical fiction, they are my four treasured examples of BUREAUCRAT FICTION (so not NOT about labor in history?) i was gonna try to make this post pithy and short but then i remembered how extremely passionate i am about this microgenre i made up. so sorry.

bureaucrat fiction is not limited by genre or format but criteria for inclusion are as follows: long and detour-filled story about functionary on the outside of society finding unexpected success within a ponderously large and powerful System/exploring themes of class and physicality and work and autonomy and what it means to hold power over others beneath the heartless crushing wheels of empire/sad little man does paperwork. also typically long as hell. should include at least one scene where the protagonist is unironically applauded-perhaps for the first time in their life-for filling out a form really good. without further ado:

soldier's heart by alex51324. the bureaucracy: british army medical corps during wwi. the bureacrat: mean gay footman/new ramc recruit thomas barrow. YEAH it's a downton abbey fic YEAH it's a masterpiece. i've talked about it before at length, my love has not faded. the crowning moment of bureaucracy is a long interlude where thomas optimizes the hospital laundry (this actually happens twice or maybe three times)

hands of the emperor by victoria goddard. the bureaucracy: crumbling fantasy empire some time after magical apocalypse. the bureacrat: passionate late-career clerk from the hinterlands cliopher mdang. i reread this book every winter bc it is as a warm bath for my SAD-addled brain and every time i neglect all my responsibilities to read all nine billion pages in three days. it puts abt 93% of the worldbuilding momentum into elaborating all of the ministries and secretaries and audits necessary to run a global government and like 7% into the magic and stuff. there are also several charming companion novellas and an equally long sequel that dives more into the central relationship between cliopher and the emperor which i highly recommend if you like gentle old man yaoi and/or magic, but there's more bureaucracy in HOTE.

the cromwell trilogy by hilary mantel. the bureaucracy: court of henry viii. the bureaucrat: thomas cromwell, the real guy. curveball! it's critically acclaimed booker prize winning rpf novel wolf hall! mantel is really interested in particular ways of gaining and maintaining power in delicate and labyrinthine systems like the tudor court, specifically in strongmen who use both physical intimidation and metaphysical manipulation to succeed. under these conditions i do think my best friend long-dead historical personage thomas cromwell counts as Bureaucrat Fiction (as do danton and robespierre in a place of greater safety. bonus rec.)

going postal by terry pratchett. the bureaucracy: fantasy postal service of ankh-morpork. the bureaucrat: conman, scammer, and little freak moist von lipwig. this is definitely shorter and lighter than the other three entries on the list, sort of a screwball take on the bureaucrat. but the mail is such a classic bureaucracy thing? who doesn't love thinking about the mail? also contains a key genre element which is a fraught sexual tension with the person immediately above the protagonist in their hierarchy, who is also their god-king and boyfriend-dad. you can't tell me vetinari isn't torturing moist psychologically AND sexually.

anyway sorry about all this. if you've read any of these come talk to me about them. bureaucrat fiction recs welcomed with the openest possible arms.

[easybrainrot34]

🩵Bridgerton Girlies Headcanons🩵

Characters : Daphne, Eloise, Francesca, Hyacinth. Bonus Kate and Penelope

Briefly Mentioned Characters : John Stirling, Philip Oliver and Amanda Crane, Anthony, Violet, Gregory, and Madame Delacroix

Note : Everyone gets 2 headcanons with one being modern and one period. Also spoilers (from the books) on Eloises period headcanon, so skip if you want. Also Hyacinth was shockingly hard to write for, but i tried my best!

A/N : I’m back!! I took pride month off bc i had real life things going and i basically spent the month being extra bi lol. Hope y’all had a good month and lets get back to writing and having fun ☺️🩵

P.S my request are open :)

🩵 I feel like Daphne would become a little bit of a match maker. I feel like she wants everyone to have what she and her mom has, which is a love match. If she say that a lady was crushing on a lord or the other way around, she would become a wing woman lol.

🩵 Eloise would take every and any classes where she can learn about social issues and history she can get her hands on in college. I feel like El would get her doctorate and become a professor in literature. She also took time in between degrees to travel the world.

🩵 Ik it’s a pretty popular headcanon that El is such a good mom but I truly feel like Philip married El bc she took Oliver and Amanda under her wing. It takes time for Eloise to not feel like she’s not replacing Marina, but once she does she loves them like they r her kids. Yes she would teach them how to become respected members of the ton, but also how to be kind, not to be scared to have a sharp tongue, and to never be afraid to be themselves.

🩵 I feel like once Fran found her voice she would frequently have no problem holding her own in debating her siblings. It’s Anthony and Eloise r the most shocked by it but welcome it nevertheless. I also feel like El would be secretly proud of her.

🩵 Fran would become a private piano teacher to the local members of high society in Scotland. She would take all kinds of students from children to young debutantes. I feel like she would convince John that this isnt for money, but truly for her love of playing music.

🩵 I feel like Hyacinth would become a writer. She keeps some of her childish wonder and with the help of the family she finally would publish her work. She specifically writes young adult romance and fantasy books.

🩵 Once Violet lets her finally read Whistledown she👏🏻goes👏🏻HAM👏🏻!! She had her governess keep all copies for the moment she was finally aloud. And lord, does she run to Pen. She talkes to Pen about all of her work; not only giving her endless praise, but also seeing if there was anything she didn’t include. She also tells Gregory about all of it (of course against his will, but he secretly doesn’t mind).

BONUS

🩵 It’s incredibly important to Kate that her children grow up knowing both her Indian culture and Anthonys British culture. I feel like she is one of those moms that will teach and speak Hindi at home so her children r bilingual. She just overall is a classic Indian mom lol.

🩵 I’ve talked about this before but i feel like Kate would really take Hyacinth under her wing. As the lady of the house, she wants her to have a great debut, not just bc it reflects on her but bc she knows Hyacinth deserves it. She also prepares her for the ups and downs of society. She knows how Hyacinth lowkey has rose tinted sunglasses on when it comes to being part of the ton, but she stresses to her that it’s ok if she isn’t perfect. I also feel like she does the same for Gregory, preparing him as much as she can, and they regularly practice on how to talk to ladies (she also gets Anthony to help him too).

🩵 Ik this is cheesy but i feel like even in the modern world Pen would be a writer, and would go under a false name. It would start with fanfics (something tells me she was writing Harry Potter and Twilight fics on fanfic dot net lol) but as she got older she would take it more seriously. She would write romance books and once she had a following she would do a whole face reveal and would do events. She would also have undercover accounts in her fandom to see what her audience really thinks of her work.

🩵 She definitely keeps her friendship with Madame Delacroix even after everything comes out. They have a weekly catch up and would even shout her out more in Whistledown now that everyone knows. She would even invite her over to her and Colin’s estate, not caring about what the ton thinks. (Bc lets be real Pen really doesn’t give a fck lol)

[nishnormp]

cheavy ramblings

Been thinking about the stinky BLU classic heavy from the comics lately. He's basically the villain of the final issues, and was practically built to be unlikeable from the start so his defeat could be more satisfying; buut since its been years since an update came out and I am slowly going insane, I think it would be funky to explore him more (bonus cmedic feature)

Few disclaimers: I'm not excusing his actions (I myself think hes a bitch) and I do NOT ship him with tf2 medic (also I dont think tf2 medic is unmasked cmedic bc 1)why would he sabotage himself in the issues by acting like That 2)uhh reasons later 3)this panel) also some of my takes aren't original, but I've expanded on em a bit

P1: Medic hater activities

As we all know, cheavy's greatest sin was dunking on + killing tf2 medic

Somehow he and tfc demo got sidetracked by medic's question, but the most hostile he gets towards tf2 medic here is jeering at the fact that they're going to hunt down his old team; which tf2 medic doesn't seem bothered by.

( @number1yisuchongfan actually brought this up before me) This panel pretty much sums up why cheavy is pissed: medic was implied to have a record of being weird with parts (he lost his license bc he stole a man's skeleton), he blew ALL of his budget meant for healing on exotic parts (that he put in cheavy's teammates), AND he revived the enemy (said enemy slips away a few panels later just as cheavy gets informed that three of his mercs died).

(also, the weird p3do tfc scout and soldier arent included in the 'three good men', since they died much later) Speaking of the 'good men' comment-

P2: Good leader at some point?? Not anymore tho

Hes gruff and an ass, but cheavy has a soft spot for his team; the tf2 mercs call each other strictly by their classes, but the tfc ones know each other names (also see cheavy's way of describing his dead teammates and his immediate reaction to go over there rather than curse/assume their incompetence)

He gets curious about australium, and from here on out he gets fixated on it- enough to be more unreasonable than usual. Cheavy is pretty amicable with Bea, and the way he acts with her is probably more in-character for what he was like back in his prime rather than the hot-tempered man that the later panels show.

I mean . He and his team were highly recommended and even took out ALL of the admin's elite teams, leaving the tf2 team for last. He may be a drill sergeant, but I don't think he was a genuine tyrant for most of his career; they aren't purely business-basis with each other (some of them formed close bonds, like fred and virgil), plus- any elite team would be able to capitalize on an overly prideful and control freaky leader (+a constantly demoralized team) sooner.

With three of his mercs dead and his plans failing against a team that he saw as rejects, the mental strain is showing badly. Tfc mercs don't have much personality in their games (or their own comic about them during their prime) but one of the few dynamics mentioned is between the Heavy and the Engineer+Medic. Tfc engie is the one who stepped up to ask about cheavy's plans, and he also gets the brunt of his anger. Earlier, cheavy answered bea's question and encouraged her, but now he's yelling and mocking the capabilities of one of the men he coordinates with the most.

Tfc scout's line may just be him not understanding/underestimating australium (esp since apparently cheavy had to ask grey mann what it even did), but it also reads as him seeing cheavy having officially gone off his rocker; his shaky grasp over leadership might kill the team before being deprived of yellow rocks does. Both scout and engie are thrown off by his attitude, implying that cheavy isn't usually like this (I can't imagine them being coordinated if they all shrimp away like that).

His line of thinking for both of these situations are pretty questionable. For the first one, he knows that the bots extract australium from the body, but he also knows that the mercs likely have nothing in them anyways (note the emphasis on his dead mercs, this is him taking revenge but also he is NAWT going to get any australium for those extra immortality machines which is still a pressing issue for his engie). In the second one, he first tells medic that they'll try figuring out how to stitch the machine on him, which leads to medic stabbing him and cheavy retaliating. Cheavy then goes all the way with attempting to kill him, stating that he'll just gets his answers from the administrator. Its soon revealed that he wants to fight tf2 heavy, but even that is ??? Like cheavy knows that he and his team are old as hell, but he's going to try having a fair fight with a guy in his prime anyways? He didn't even know that he could just slap on the machine at the time, and the unnecessary risk for what seems to be a quest to satisfy his ego is antithetical to his supposed goal of getting the rocks and making his team immortal. At this point, his hatred of medic has completely overridden his rationality; there were many ways for him to have killed both of them, yet he didn't take em.

P3: Cmedic

I saw some posts abt how cheavy is likely coded as homophobic due to how he treats medic (a presumably gay-coded character) bc of the "stay in the kitchen"-esque dialogue, and the way cheavy undermines him in verbal + physical ways. I do not have a very solid defense for this . aside from everything I listed before.

Just to clarify, I think its cheavy's fault for alienating medic from the start: loss of medical license aside, medic's inventions DO work splendidly for healing. Would it have been more concerning since medic is . meant to heal? Maybe. But mercs are literal murderers for hire, personality quirks should be the last of their priorities. The guy is passionate about showing off his stuff, and he was even enthusiastic about getting on the battlefield and healing cheavy. I'm not saying medic was going to be 100% loyal, but he's willing to do his job for the classics as long as he wasn't disrespected so damn much.

The tfc mercs with personalities are ones that oppose their tf2 counterpart; tfc sniper is a sadist rather than a swift professional, tfc pyro is...also a sadist rather than having tf2 pyro's misguided bubbliness, and cheavy does not respect his team's (current) medic. This in conjunction with the complete and utter lack of not just presence but also mention of tfc medic leads to the popular belief that the guy just up and left because of the disrespect.

(Writing inconsistencies be damned I like to cope) so what if it wasn't the case?

These are one of the few lines in tfc that describe a cooperative nature between certain classes. Like I mentioned earlier, tfc has less media compared to tf2 so its easy to slot personalities onto them as villains (tfc sniper's gun blowing people into giblets kinda helps), but I don't think these can be ignored. Fred was the one who represented the rest of the team's opinions to cheavy, and the phrasing in the second pic is even stronger; the heavymedic duo was always a thing, even in tfc.

Sort of. Gameplay-wise, cmedic is more like a roided out scout armed with a medkit that can give enemies and disguised spies tuberculosis, grenades that can send him across the map, and a gun that can destroy sentries (situational). He doesn't need to cling to his more offensive teammates as much as tf2 medic, and while his kit can instantly heal a teammate to full no matter the percentage + give overheal- its strictly melee ranged and has no ubercharge. In a narrative sense, cmedic would most likely oppose tf2 medic as a more 'grounded' healer. He prevents damage to his team by erasing enemies himself, doesn't go too overboard with his biochemical arsenal (his brew is potent but hes stuck with the melee-ranged kit and no crazy mechanic like uber), and can typically run off by himself (provided he isn't jumped by two soldiers or smth). Its a matter of game design, but can translate to the comics in an interesting way.

Medic is the only one who speaks of cmedic, and while the mention itself has no violent reaction- no one else speaks of him. I can't imagine him being easily forgotten since the heavymedic duo is just too iconic, so what if smth exceptionally horrible just happened to him? If cmedic was close to cheavy than everyone else, his loss/disappearance could explain cheavy's immediate dislike for tf2 med; not only replacing his own med, but with the complete opposite in terms of personality as well.

(I could expand on cmedic more, but this post is already long enough as is so I'll probably just make a separate one gah)

[airenyah]

joongdunk vampire bl when??

maybe you've already seen my post "reasons why i need a sexy joongdunk bl". and if you have, then maybe you remember the bonus vampire section at the end

well, i've decided to start collecting vampire mentions here in this own separate post. here i will collect instances where either joong or dunk actually utters the word "vampire" but i will also include things somewhat adjacent to vampires (looking at you, lol fanfast 2023 dum dum neck biting action 👀)

i'll keep updating this post with every future vampire mention that i happen to come across. if you happen to find a vampire mention that is not yet in this post but you think it should be on the list, then do feel free to send me a link to it and i might just add it!! some of them, esp the vampire-adjacent things will be added based on vibes (my vibes, that is. it's my post so i get to put in it whatever the fuck i want)

like this one for example:

[hidden agenda ep12 pt4 (3:25); (24.09.2023)]

like yeah i know this one doesn't really count bc those are just some lines in a series from one fictional character to another fictional character that just happens to be played by dunk but like!! is it not true!! being a vampire (on tv) is dunk's dream job, is it not!!!!

no but seriously tho, dunk wants to play a vampire, he explicitly said so:

[dunk x tops; (30.09.2023)]

and so did joong, for that matter:

[l'officiel hommes thailand: "the act of being myself" | translation; (08.12.23)]

[joong's 23rd birthday event; (17.03.2024)] (extended gifset here)

now, the dum dum performance deserves it's own little section lbr. bc seriously wtf was all that:

[LOL fanfest D1; (24.06.2023) | LOL fanfest D2; (25.06.2023)]

[arm share ep131; (02.08.2023)]

oh and make no mistake, it's not me who's making the dum dum performance about vampires, no, dunk is:

[let's talk bl s4 ep07; (16.08.2023)]

no seriously, let 👏 them 👏 play 👏 vampires!! they've already got experience in biting each other's necks!!!!

ok from here on out i think i'll stop with the babbling and just have a collection of gifs with random vampire mentions that i'll just continue to add to this post whenever i come across more bc why the fuck not

[instagram live; (09.10.2023)]

[hidden hangout ep2; (14.11.2023)]

[original twitter thread | translation 1 | translation 2; (18.12.2023)]

[allthefujoshiunite]

Entryway to heavens, a.k. the BL genre!

As requested by @weiying-tododeku-2023 , who wanted to dip their toes into the genre, I, Nora, am once again here to compile a recommendation list that you can take a peek. Most titles here won't be any news to my seasoned fujin frens, but it's always interesting to think of which manga or anime would be the best for a newcomer!

BL ANIME

We don't have many options to choose from when it comes to anime, so I might as well start from here.

Stranger by the Shore: This 1-hour, gorgeous movie is an adaptation from Kii Kanna's manga of the same name. Since it's short, I think it's better to focus on what the plot has to offer instead of expecting a deeper dive into the characters individually.

Sasaki and Miyano: Another manga adaptation, but this time it's 12-episode series (with a +1 OVA). Very sweet and emotionally rich coming-of-age story with a fudanshi as its MC. A must see!

NO.6: Less like a BL and more of a sci-fi anime with queer MCs, NO.6 is not exactly suitable for a newcomer, but I still wanted to include it because of its tender story and the companionship between Shion and Nezumi. So you shouldn't expect a big emphasis on romance.

Bonus: This Boy is a Professional Wizard: This is a 4-episode short anime. It's honestly gorgeous and cute, but not very "deep" as every episode is around 8 minutes. You can finish it in one sitting!

There are so many other popular (and great) BLs or action/sports series that have queer characters out there: Given, Banana Fish, Yuuri!! on ICE, Doukyuusei, Case Study of Vanitas, The Case Files of Jeweler Richard, The Night Beyond the Tricornered Window, Antique Bakery, Yes No or Maybe? etc. They are already popular so with a quick search you can find more about them as you finish the ones you've started!

BL MANGA

Now, this... is a challenge. There are SO MANY good stuff that it's hard to pick, so I decided to go with my gut xD

I Didn't Mean To Fall In Love (Suzumaru Minta): There's something in this series that just.. UGH! It hits me. I have reviewed it before so you can head over there to find more information, synopsis, and my thoughts.

Love Tractor (Hmmyongyong & Angrymonster): I started reading it for the sake of the challenge I mentioned above but what a joy this one turned out to be!! Has great balance of fun and drama, gorgeous to boot. The main story is finished but there'll be a continuation! Here's my review.

Here and There and Us (Thanat): This is a very interesting work (as any other Thanat work, I'm a huge fan of the artist) and it's less focused on the romance and more on the main characters and their friend circle navigating their high school life and the the ever-changing relationship between them. If you're looking for something that's more slow burn, this should be your go-to BL.

Under My Skin (Usui Iroha): People tend to stay away from spicy recommendations for newcomers but I say, why not give it a go! Usui Iroha has a way of drawing sultry gazes that'll make your heart skip a beat! I'm taking a break now, but I normally review a new BL title every Friday, and I've also reviewed Under My Skin before because it's THAT good.

Dream Away (Hana Lee): If you like a sprinkle of supernatural on your plate, then this is for you. The art style is simple yet eye catching, it's short and completed, the characters are wholesome; what more you could ask for!

Bonus - Swing Baby (Mudan): This manhwa, again, is a bit different. It does feel like it has supernatural elements at first and is a bit confusing (bc there's an interesting stylistic choice in narration) but it'll feel worth sticking to! Here's another Friday BL review if you'd like to check some screenshots out and read the synopsis.

And that's it! Welcome aboard and hopefully, at least one of these titles will be to your liking. Thank you for sending an ask, see you around!

[riordanness]

hyperspecific poll bc why not

idk how hyperspecific this is but i tried

[thegreatnpowerfulspuukiiz]

clarence is soooo interesting to me bro i just wanna put him under a microscope and study him for hours i have soooo many questions.

like??? are his parents straight edge too or is it just him?? and if it’s just him what MADE be like “nahh.” and choose to become straight edge??

why doesn’t he have claws like kazu?? i get that they’re different types of vampires but what even IS a nosferatu??? google said it’s just another word for vampire 😭 do imps outrank nosferatu or vise versa??

he likes cooking things that can be enjoyed by all devils INCLUDING nosferatus and in any art we see of everyone eating, he’s usually just drinking a blood bag so does that mean he literally can’t eat/digest certain foods unless they’re made with his devil type in mind?? is bro not hungry??

bc we often we kazu eating loads of different things but once again they’re different devil types so ig i can’t keep comparing them i just idk RAH

it seems clarence’s biggest issue is having to take the blood straight from the source (hence why he’s always drinking from bags) and ik that both nosferatu blood and mandragora fruits are life forces but i wonder if clarence would’ve gotten the same effect from drinking yahgie’s blood since he’s not either of those devil types??

i think i recall yahgie saying some of his own blood was mixed into the ramen as well but it was the nosferatu/mandragora mix that made clarence go into blood rapture, yahgie’s blood likely just being an added strength bonus. i recall clarence mentioning that he's weaker than pandy bc of the type of blood he drinks, but when they went on the field trip he wasn't put in the group with weak devils like nemo and kazu.

and from the action panels of clarence vs kaiko, he seems to understand how to use these power ups. this plus the panel where he says “no one should have this power.” and talks about how it disgusts him, makes me guess that this isn’t the first time he’s gone into rapture.

i just wonder what he’s seen or heard or even DONE himself that made him so against utilizing his powers?? and if i’m remembering correctly, in the flashbacks/arts we’ve seen of baby clarence he didn’t have the straight edge tattoo and neither did his parents, one of which who can FLY (his mama), so i’m assuming that this was a recent decision he made when he was older??

also if he drank fresh devil blood would he be able to fly on the regular like his mom?? and do non-straight edge nosferatu vamps just go around biting folks for fresh food?? like I'D HAVE AN ISSUE WITH THAT TOO PROBABLY

HE’S JUST???? SO INTERESTING I WANNA KNOW mORE ABOUT HIMMMMMM I JUST???? I LOVE HIM SM ANSWER MY MANY QUERIES @devilscandycomic PLS IM BEGGING SOMEONE ANYONE

*collapses to my knees in anguish and sobs*

anyway all art/panels taken from the official devil’s candy site (where it can be read for free!!!!) or tsuala’s insta/twitter!!

also the next volume drops in july and my boy’s on the spine and front cover let’s heckin goooo 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

[elendsessor]

bonus headcanon/relationship study ramble since the brainrot is eating away still and bc i do really enjoy their dynamic

some general + canon of vengeance koshimizu hcs and relationship with the protag hcs ahead.

this does contain massive af spoilers for smtvv and can be potentially triggering since death and depression mentions.

-koshimizu has a dad bod sorry not sorry.

-in fact he’s a total goddamn dad. literally old fashioned. he also enjoys watching baseball and yes can work a grill.

-there’s a bethel japan facebook group (he didn’t start it one of the scientists did and made him create a facebook account) so yes he’s had the displeasure of boomer meme exposure. abdiel won’t stop sharing those ai generated jesus pics either.

-his luck with relationships is so bad. let’s ignore the whole in actual japanese mythology tsukuyomi got married to amaterasu (aka his damn sister) thing. he only pursued one due to seeing humans do that, and since he does have a lot of kinship with humanity, yeah he’s gonna mimic behavior. did hook up with abdiel out of some kind of obligation but had no actual romantic feelings. it was the worst year and a half of his life. they can’t stand one another.

-one of many hcs i displayed in a fic i wrote but basically he met yuzuru via the fact that he constantly had to take miyazu to the nearest hospital. he might’ve not allowed it except he did notice some kind of connection. didn’t realize yuzuru was his knowledge until much later yet tried his hardest to keep him out of the demon summoning business. didn’t work obviously, yet he appreciated yuzuru’s enthusiasm. does treat both atsuta siblings like family and adoption was something he thought about, but due to his position, work, etc., it never came to be.

-is overworked to hell and back. seems to be the last of the logistics type proto fiends anyways so yeah has a lot of pressure put on him. despite being the prime minister, he doesn’t actually do a lot of that stuff. mostly up to proper politicians. he’s kinda like a mouthpiece for them since he was made to be that way. is responsible for anything revolving around public safety. has and always will be his top priority.

-his relationship with vkun is absurdly rocky. it’s more than the whole different souls thing or the fact that they haven’t properly worked with one another. they struggle to communicate and function as a nahobino and he does blame himself for it. they’re doing it out of necessity. really if it were up to him especially after losing yuzuru he would’ve never partnered up with vkun. however, thanks to aogami, he does feel like he owes it to his brother to take care of him.

-it’s weird knowing he has basically a second brother nor fully knows how sibling relations work. yes, he cares deeply and does have that brotherly connection with vkun, but they can’t find common ground outside of wanting to avenge their original partners, and he’s sure that’s not something they should be bonding over (or he should be encouraging). he wants to comfort vkun, but doesn’t know how to. he’s made attempts, but can’t fully follow through with what he thinks he should be doing.

-i did notice (and might make a more in depth post about) how, while not the dominant one, koshimizu does occasionally take over more. for how i see it, due to studies done on aogami and vkun’s nahobino form, he thinks it best to let vkun be in control since it’s more familiar to him. combat types hadn’t had success with fusion, nor have any for that matter, but they were made with being an extension in mind. as such, while inherently compatible with vkun, his different functions plus vkun not being his knowledge makes their form unstable.

-has plenty of regrets, including his relationship with aogami. they already were distant in design and where they ended up, but i do think he felt like he was, in some ways, superior due to how he adopted human emotions and culture while aogami hadn’t. it wasn’t until the battle for the throne or aogami’s “death” that he realized how much he cared.

-while he does state mourning won’t bring his or vkun’s partner back, he does experience grief, but bottles his emotions up as much as possible. part of it is because he always had to once he first developed feelings. he’s still a demon/machine thing and as such believes he shouldn’t have them, especially since he was made with potentially dying in mind. though, this is also because he wants to stay strong for vkun, especially with how badly vkun takes it. koshimizu is a lot more calm and capable than his new partner. he knows that. all he can do is try to provide some support.

-that being said the one thing he did do was make a small grave for yuzuru exactly where he passed on. there was a chance it could be destroyed, there was no body left behind, etc., yet he did think it to be the right thing to do.

-had no idea how to tell miyazu. in fact, he wanted to avoid telling her altogether. with the end of the world coming up, he’d rather not give her more emotional baggage, plus it likely wouldn’t have mattered. word spreads quickly so she learned about her brother’s passing anyways. all the things she accused koshimizu of doing in that missable subquest? he took those to heart. even though he knew none of it was true, he still felt guilty.

-the other unstable part about the tsukuyomibino? one of them supposedly hates the other. vkun thinks his presence is an insult. they look too damn familiar, and koshimizu instinctively calls him “young man.” only aogami can call him that—he’s adamant about it. doesn’t like the idea of sharing a body with him, either. he wasn’t even going to take the throne, rather leaving it up to goddess tao and possibly goddess yoko to decide. both his and koshimizu’s plan was to take down tiamat and whatever else remained of the qadištu.

-whatever happens after that? vkun feels like he might as well die. his mental health declining rapidly was something koshimizu noticed right away and tried working with him on. they did end up bonding more through this. vkun says he hates him, but in reality, he truly doesn’t, and regrets giving koshimizu the cold shoulder. he did want to apologize and thank him, but after realizing he’d never get the chance to, he at least decided to visit any tsukuyomi-related shrines to properly mourn/pray for him (though this is only for the law route, in chaos, he more ends up writing poems n letters in his memory). of course koshimizu understands his frustration. if there’s an afterlife he’s in, he does wish he could tell him that it’s okay.

-their form’s stability improved over time but this couldn’t be said for koshimizu’s ability to fight. he wasn’t made for it nor has had any real combat experience. some dialogue from one of the researchers suggests that it is taking a toll on him. he was going to die one way or another and accepted his fate long ago. didn’t make pushing himself any less torturous.