#i just struggle to see how my bestfriend with her lovely dark eyes and curls and nice nose counts as 'white' when ppl call her the k slur

[rebellum]

The whole transandrophobia discussion thing is weird bc it feels like it's a bunch of poc and jewish trans people being like "here are my experiences of how specifically being MASCULINE had affected me, and the discrimination and violence I experienced based on that. And here is how that relates to me being a racial/ethnic minority"

And then a few loud white trans people going "ohhh you wanna be oppressed so bad you *slur*. This is why there aren't any poc in your movement it's because REAL poc understand intersectionality"

[booksarelife-stuff]

Gold Rush

Jily (James Potter/Lily Evans), Minor wolfstar

Word Count: 4856

Lily didn’t expect to be having these feelings for James when 7th year starts. Featuring a jealous and pining Lily. 

Read on AO3

When James caught her eye from across the Gryffindor table, she didn’t expect a fluttering feeling in her chest to blossom. 

Summer had been kind to him in ways that almost made Lily angry. He seemed to grow into his features. His cheeks had lost all the baby fat, making sharp cheekbones appear, and he had gotten new glasses that seemed to frame his face a lot better and highlight his hazel eyes. The dimple in his left cheek still made appearances when he smirked and god, his jawline was heavenly. His voice had also deepened to a nice even baritone that when Lily first heard it, it had taken a second to realize that James had spoken. 

Alarm bells started going off as he smiled at her. She quickly smiled and turned away, hiding the blush that was starting to form on her cheeks. 

She could not be thinking about James Potter like that. 

~~~

Lily hadn’t been particularly thrilled with having to share a living space with just him. It could be worse, as she had been expecting Remus and he wasn’t the tidiest. She had been in the boys’ dorm a few times and it was never messy, but Remus told her that it was because James cleaned it. 

It hadn’t been bad, besides the fluttering in her stomach when he walked in. 

Lily was reading a book on professional level charms, her legs stretched out on the sofa by the fireplace. The head dorm was nice and Lily wondered if it changed based on who were the heads that year because it resembled the Gryffindor common room closely, with more cushy furniture than necessary. 

She was about to turn the page when the bookcase that hid the entrance swung open. 

She hated the butterflies that formed in her stomach.

James stepped in, soaking from the rain. He had had Quidditch practice. 

“It’s raining horribly,” he said as a greeting. 

Lily opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. His hair was flat for once in his life and sticking to his forehead. He had a curl plastered on his forehead. His t-shirt was clinging to him. James wasn’t buff, but he was lean and his defined muscles were nothing to laugh at. 

“I swear I almost drowned in mid-air,” he said. “Is that even a thing?”

“No, I don’t believe so,” Lily said, turning away and looking at her book. He got out his wand and started charming himself dry. 

“Practice went okay otherwise,” he said, finally getting his shoes dry. 

“How’s the new seeker?” she asked, not looking at James as he flung himself into the sofa across from her. 

“Doing good. Just need to make a few improvements on her techniques,” he said. 

Lily spared a glance and wished she didn’t. His legs were spread out and his head threw back, exposing his neck. She hoped that he didn’t see her blush.  

“Who’s the first game against?” she asked. 

“Ravenclaw,” he said. “They got a strong keeper, but I don’t think they’ll be a problem. Hufflepuff has a great line up though and it has me a bit worried.”

“It’ll be fine. Gryffindor always pulls through,” she said. James laughed a little. 

“Yeah, but doesn’t mean I can’t try to eliminate a struggle,” he said. Lily looked up and saw he was looking at her. “I like it when I can crush them with little to no problems.”

Lily rolled her eyes. 

“I think a struggle is a better show of feat,” she replied. “Shows how you work under pressure.”

“Ah, but when there’s no struggle, it shows that we don’t have any weakness,” he said. 

“Spoken like a true Gryffindor,” Lily said.  James laughed and the butterflies in Lily’s stomach started up again. 

James asked about what she was reading and she found that she forgot about the anxiety that had started to surround her when he was near. He was easy to talk to, always had been when they weren’t intent on arguing for the sake of arguing. 

~~

When Lily joined in with James at the breakfast table of trying to throw sausages into Sirius’s mouth, that’s when she knew she had a problem. 

Lily was never one for rules, especially if they were unfair. She upheld the ones she agreed to, sometimes bent them when she saw fit, but the outward display of joining in the Marauders was crossing an invisible line. 

Lily didn’t see that line until Marlene pulled her aside after History of Magic and casted a silencing charm around them. 

“So when did you realize you’re head over heels for James?” she asked. Count on Marlene to always jump straight to the point.

Lily almost dropped her books. 

“What are you talking about?” she asked. 

Marlene rolled her blue eyes at Lily.

“Come off it,” she said. “It’s obvious. The Lily that despised him fifth year would never have spent the morning trying to break his sausage-throwing record or share your notes with him.”

Lily felt angry.

“Just because I’m being friendly doesn’t mean I like him!” she hissed. Marlene was unphased by Lily’s anger. 

“Oh Lily, don’t be upset. He’s fit as fuck and a decent guy,” she said. “I would be shocked if you didn’t!”

“You know how much I hate crushes,” Lily said, fighting the urge to stomp her foot like a child. “It’s pointless!”

Marlene laughed. 

“Sometimes, you can’t fight it,” she said. She waved her wand and the silencing charm around them faded. “Let’s get to lunch.”

Lily walked beside her in silence, fuming. 

There were a few reasons why Lily hated crushes. She hated how they painted the world in rose colored glasses, obscuring truths. She thought about the crush she had had on a 7th year Ravenclaw when she was in fifth year. 

Lily didn’t remember his name, just that she had tried many times to speak to him when they were at the library at the same time. Lily felt like she was flying every time she saw him, with every word he spoke to her.

Then came the bone-crush. He kissed her one day over her charms homework and the next day she found out he had a girlfriend, a fourth year Hufflepuff. 

Lily felt disgusting and immediately told her. 

When she looked back at that experience, she felt hot anger and embarrassment. The rose colored world she had seen had blinded her from the truth. 

She should have noticed how flippant he was when she asked him questions. How once he caught on to Lily’s crush, he would find a table in the back, out of the way from passersby. Lily had thought it was because he wanted alone time, not because he was hiding from his girlfriend or anyone who might rat on her. 

She had vowed that she was never going to make an utter fool of herself again. 

Lily pushed down her anger and looked forward to have a nice peaceful lunch with her friends that she missed so dearly. Alice, Dorcas, and Mary were waiting for them at the end of the table, but as Lily’s eyes looked on, she found a sight that made her almost vomit. 

There was James, sitting across from Amelia Bones, a Hufflepuff in their year. 

He was flashing her his signature smile and laughing at something she said, running a hand through his messy hair. 

She peeled her eyes away and took her seat next to Alice, forcing herself not to stare at them. 

She picked at her food and tried hard to pay attention to her friends. 

“Hogsmeade is next week, right?” Lily asked, suddenly. 

“Sure is,” Mary said, sipping some of her juice. 

“I want to get plastered at the Three Broomsticks,” Lily said. The girls laughed. 

“It’s date,” Marlene announced. “I’ve been waiting to see you drunk since you took that shot of firewhiskey.”

Lily rolled her eyes, thinking of the time Marlene snuck a firewhiskey up to their dorm last year and Lily almost threw up after one shot. 

The girls started planning the trip. 

Despite her resolve, she shot a glance at Amelia and James, who were just getting up from the table. James met her eyes and winked at her, to which Lily rolled her eyes because it let her do something other than blush. 

~~~

Lily would be an idiot if she thought that she was the only one to notice James. That didn’t mean she had to like it though. 

James had been asked out three times in one breakfast and though she had no claim to him, it was grating on her nerves. 

“So Prongs,” Sirius started as the brave third year who just asked James this morning left. “You’re turning into quite a lady killer.”

James snorted. 

“I’m starting to think someone is cursing them,” he said. “It’s mental.”

“Face it, Prongs,” Sirius said. “You’re a hot ticket item.”

“They’re dying to have your babies,” Remus said, not looking up from his copy of the Daily Prophet. 

“They’re going to kidnap you and force you to go on a date with them,” Peter added. 

“Probably going to slip you some love potion,” Lily said. James whipped his head and looked at her. 

“I expect them to gang up on me, but you Evans? Betrayal,” he said. 

Lily smiled and bit back the green monster that was going to reel it’s head if she thought about it too hard. 

“I know what’s going on,” she said. 

“Please, be our insight into the female mind,” Sirius said, brushing a strand of dark hair behind his ear. 

Lily rolled her eyes. 

“Teenagers are horny,” she said. “James is headboy, plays Quidditch. Every fifteen year old’s dream.”

Lily kept her eyes on her tea as she took a sip. She could feel his eyes on her. What she really wanted to say is that she got it. She got why these girls were dying for James. Lily herself felt like she would die in order to have James touch or snog. 

She was trying to get that to stop. 

“And he’s fit,” Remus said. Sirius glared at his boyfriend. “Objectively speaking. Not my type, sorry James.”

“I don’t take it personally,” James grumbled, taking it personally. 

“Just be happy you can get a date,” Peter said. “I can’t get one for the life of me!”

“How about this Pete,” James said, resting his elbows on the table. “Tell me who you fancy and I’ll ask their bestfriend out and see if I can’t get a double date?”

Here was the bone-crush. Here is where the misery came and grabbed Lily. 

“You’d do that for me?” Peter asked, his eyes wide. 

“Once,” he said. “I’m going to help you woo the pants off of this girl and hope you get a second date on your own.”

If Peter said who he fancied, it was lost on Lily. She stared at the cup of tea in front of her, watching the surface of the liquid vibrate. 

She could imagine going on a date with him, so vividly it hurts. She could practically picture walking with him down the slope, hand in hand. Sitting across from him at the Three Broomsticks and stealing his chips. And that image hurt as she watched them plan their double date.

James nudged Lily, jarring herself out her thoughts. 

“Time for Transfig,” he said. “Ready?”

Lily nodded and stood up. As she grabbed her bag, she saw Remus watching her. He gave her a small smile and she tried to return it. 

James, Sirius, and Peter were already walking ahead of them when Remus came beside her. 

“So, I take it you’re against the double date?” he asked as they started up the stairs. 

“No, why would I?” she asked quickly. 

Remus sighed deeply and just shook his head. They caught up to the other boys. 

~~~

Once Lily heard James was taking Amelia Bones to Hogsmeade, she was even more determined to get wasted at the Three Broomsticks. She was a rational person. She knew that getting wasted to forget a stupid crush was immature, but she could be immature for a night. 

She put more effort into her appearance than normally for a girls night out. Normally she would be fine with jeans and a jumper, but Mary had suggested they act like they were going to the hottest nightclub in the U.K. 

Lily didn’t have a lot of clothes appropriate for that, but Mary was her size and had tons of sparkling dresses that she was willing to let Lily borrow. 

Mary had picked a gold sequined dress that was a little shorter than Lily was used to, but she knew she could make it work. It was strapless and Lily had a slightly bigger breast than Mary, so Lily placed a sticking charm on the sweetheart neckline. 

Lily also did some beauty charms. One to make her hair have more beachy waves than her own slightly sad waves. The make-up charms turned out better than she thought as her emerald eyes looked bigger with the eyeliner charm. 

She checked the time, gave herself one final look over, and then grabbed her coat, and left her room, stepping out in the common room. She heard something fall as she closed the door. 

James was standing at his door, staring at Lily like he was deer caught in the headlights. 

He was ready for his date, a nice dark green shirt and pants that had been pressed. He looked good and Lily hated it. 

“Evans, what are you wearing?” he asked. Lily looked down at her dress. 

“A dress?”

“You look…” he started, eyeing her up and down. “Stunning.”

Lily felt her cheeks heat up. 

“Thanks. It’s for the girl’s night,” she said. The air felt awkward as the silence fell. 

James looked away, clearing his throat. 

“Where are you going? For the girl’s night,” he asked, picking up his wand that he had dropped. 

“Three Broomsticks,” Lily replied. “Where’s your date?”

“Madam Padifoots,” he replied. 

“Aw, that’s romantic,” Lily said, forcing a smile. 

“Pete picked it,” he said. “I would rather be drowning in some Butterbeer.”

Silence fell again. Lily wanted to say something, but she found it hard. James hadn’t looked at her since he picked up his wand. 

“Well, have a good time,” Lily said, making her way to the bookcase. 

“Same,” James said. 

The walk down was freezing, but once Lily sat in a booth, squished between Mary and Dorcas, she realized it was worth it. 

They started out with some food, but soon enough the drinks kept coming. Lily felt wobbly as her and Mary sang a Muggle song on the top of their lungs. She was spinning when Alice admitted her and Frank had had sex in his childhood bedroom over the summer. 

She was absolutely gone with Remus and Sirius stood at the end of the booth. 

“You lot are cut off for the rest of the night,” Remus said. Lily started giggling at his stern expression. 

“Oi! Remy,” Mary said, her words slurred. “How big is Black? We have a bet.”

“I’ll have you know I’m packing,” Sirius said, not the least bit phased. 

Lily snorted.

“He’s average,” Remus replied. All the girls started laughing. Lily felt tears in her eyes as Sirius elbowed Remus. 

“He’s joking,” Sirius said. Remus shook his head, unknown to Sirius, and the laughter started again. 

“We’re escorting back to the castle,” Remus said. 

The loud “aw” that escaped their lips was enough to make the rest of the bar turn and look at them. 

Marlene almost fell when she tried to walk and Remus ran out for a second. He came back with James. 

Normal, sober Lily would be ashamed of herself in the morning. 

“James!” she yelled. James smiled and widened his eyes. “I’m drunk!”

James ran a hand through his hair and smiled, his dimple making an appearance. 

“I can see that, Lils,” he said. 

He helped her up off the bench and caught her as she stumbled. His hand was warm on her arm and goose flesh appeared. 

“Let’s try to get you back in one piece, alright?” he said. 

“Carry me,” she said, giggling. James gave her a look she was too drunk to read into. 

“I will if I have too,” he said. 

He helped her put her coat on and then placed his arm around her in order to steady her walk. 

The rest of the group was in front of them. Mary and Dorcas, stumbling, but they were fine compared to Alice, Marlene, and Lily. Alice was Sirius’s back while Marlene was basically using Remus as a cane. 

“Where’s Peter?” Lily asked. 

“He had a pretty nice date,” James replied. “I think they’re still out.”

At the mention of the date, Lily pouted. 

“So your date was nice?” she asked. She hated that tears were forming in her eyes. 

James took a moment to answer. 

“I mean, Amelia and I just talked about our Divination project. I told her it was for Pete,” he said. “We aren’t interested in each other.”

Lily’s heart soared and her eyes dried. 

“Why’d you get all dressed up if it wasn’t a real date?” she slurred. 

“Because it was real for Pete and Ingrid,” he replied. 

“It’s a shame,” Lily said, frowning. 

“What’s a shame?”

“That Amelia could pass you up looking like that!” Lily said, stumbling into him a bit. “I mean your arse looks fantastic! Almost as good as your Quidditch pants.”

James paused for a second and Lily almost tripped but James caught her and steadied her. 

“You’re more drunk than I thought,” James said. Drunk Lily didn’t notice the tightness in her voice.

“Yes,” she said. “And it’s fantastic!”

“You won’t be saying that tomorrow,” he mumbled. 

The boys brought them all back to the head dorm, which made the girls squeal and get excited about a sleepover. James deposited Lily on the couch and quickly made his way over to the potion station in the corner of the room.

“I love the dorm!” Alice chirped, looking around. 

“These couches are ten times better than the ones in the tower,” Marlene said, curling up on the couch by Dorcas. 

“I agree,” Mary said. 

Lily’s eyes wandered to James, who was at the potion station. She was staring at him, but was jared when Sirius sat next to her. 

“How many drunk head girls do you think entered this dorm?” he said, smirking at her. 

Lily threw a pillow at him. 

“Probably all of them,” she replied. “You don’t make head girl without a dash of mischief.”

Sirius raised his eyebrows at her. 

“Lily Evans and mischief? I find that unlikely,” he said. Lily felt offended. 

“Who hexed Avery to make his voice high pitched, huh?” she said, crossing her arms. 

Sirius widened his steel blue eyes. 

“That was you?” he said. 

“Of course it was bloody me! He called me a mudblood and I just snapped!” she fired back. 

“That’s not mischief then Lils, that’s justice,” he said. Lily laughed, loudly. 

“And I’d do it again,” she said. “I also stole Snape’s potion essay once.”

“Evans!” Sirius said, clutching his chest like he was scandalized. 

“He was being a prat! He kept going on and on about he was the best in potions! So I took his essay before it was due,” she said, rather proudly. “He got detention and I found a major error in his essay. I circled it and stuffed it back into his bag.”

Laughter erupted around her, making her feel warm and proud. Alice was clutching her side.

“What else have you done, Evans?” Sirius enquired, leaning back on the cushions and crossing his legs. 

Lily hummed and thought for a second. 

“I changed James’ quidditch robes to neon pink in fifth year,” she said. 

“That was you?!” James exclaimed from across the room. “I didn’t talk to Sirius for a week!”

Sirius doubled over with laughter. 

“I remember that!” Mary said, clapping her hands. “You did it because James threw a piece of parchment at you and asked you out in the middle of the hallway!”

Lily remembered it and laughed. 

“He was such an arse!” she said. 

“Was, did you say Evans?” Sirius inquired. 

“Yes, was,” she confirmed. Sirius shot her a look. 

The conversation drifted away from Lily’s mischief to how Mary engorged Marlene’s tongue when she thought she told the school one of her secrets. Lily’s eyes drifted back to James, who was bent over a steaming cauldron. Lily, ever the potions master, decided she must know what he was making. 

She wobbled across the room and stood next to James, so close their arms bumped. 

“Whatchya making?” she asked. 

“A sober-up potion for you lot,” he said. “Then I’ll make a hangover-be-gone tomorrow for you guys.”

“I don’t want to sober up,” Lily pouted. She grabbed James’s arm and leaned her head against it. James didn’t say to protest it. 

“You’ll be thanking me in the morning,” he said with a smirk. Lily rolled her eyes. 

He was finely chopping the roots and Lily watched him, her could feel the muscles on his arms move, but she didn’t want to move and James wasn’t pushing her away. 

“Shouldn’t you dice them?” she asked. James scoffed. 

“You’re drunk and you’re still critiquing my potions,” he said. 

“I wouldn’t have to critique if you did it the right way.” James erupted in laughter. 

“Trust me, Evans. I’ve made this a few times,” he said. Lily didn’t reply, she just watched the cauldron bubble from her spot on James’s arm. 

“I’m sorry about asking you out that way in fifth,” he mumbled. 

“It’s okay,” she said. “You were just an obnoxious little boy.”

“You don’t think I'm still an obnoxious little boy?”

“Nope,” she said. “You would have never made headboy if that was the case.”

“True,” he said. He turned the potion off and stirred it until it was a clear color. Lily let go of his arm once he was ready to pour it for them. 

Lily drank hers and watched as James started handing out the rest to her friends. 

As the minutes ticked by, she realized she was going to regret a lot in the morning. 

~~~

Lily remembered everything of her drunken night clearly, which is why she was determined to put as much space as possible between her and James. 

She told him he had a nice arse! That was something she could never come back from. Ever. 

He didn’t mention it and she was grateful for it. He did get her back from making his Quidditch uniform pink and during breakfast when her black robes turned a stunning shade of pink. When she made eye contact with James down the table, twirling his wand in his fingers, she just laughed. She left them that color for the rest of the day. 

The only thing is that James started walking closer to her in the corridors when they patrolled together. His arm brushing against hers constantly. She often wondered what would happen if she just grabbed this hand. Which is why she started making the distance bigger.

Lily was spending her time in their shared common room when he was gone or at practice. She knew the time that James would be in and made sure to either be at the library, her bedroom, or in the Gryffindor Tower with the girls. 

She was packing her things up, about to move to her bedroom before James came back from practice. She wasn’t expecting the bookcase to swing open ten minutes early and reveal a sweaty James Potter. 

She fought the urge to get up and run without saying anything, but she held firm and tried to put her books away without looking like she was trying to do so as fast as she could. 

“Hey Evans,” James said, smiling a little at her. 

“Hey Potter,” Lily said as evenly as she could, darting her eyes back to her textbook. 

“I feel like I haven’t seen you in a hot minute,” James said. 

Lily glanced up to see him standing by the couch. 

“We ate breakfast together,” she pointed out. 

“You sat like, three people away from me,” he said. 

Lily took a deep breath. She was getting irate and couldn’t quite place why. 

“I talked to you in Transfiguration,” she pointed out. 

She heard James sigh. 

“I just asked to borrow a quill,” he said. 

Something in his tone made Lily look at him. He was standing at the side of the couch looking utterly frustrated, running a hand through his damp hair.  

“I don’t know what you’re getting at,” Lily said, looking back at her book before their eyes could meet. 

There was a heavy silence. 

“I don’t get you,” he said after a moment. 

“‘Get me’?” Lily asked, snapping her book shut. Lily looked up and saw that James looked frustrated. 

“One minute, I feel like we’re finally getting on and then next you act like I’m a second year who just wants to pull your hair,” James said. 

“We are getting on,” Lily said, crossing her arms. 

“Are we?” he questioned. 

Lily stood up, anger flaring in her stomach. 

“Well, we were,” she said, crossing her arms. 

James took a deep breath and turned away from Lily. 

“Can you just tell me what is going on?” he snapped. “I know I’ve done some pretty shitty things in the past. I’ve been trying to be better! Snape cursed me in the hallway and I didn’t curse him back because I knew you’d be upset!”

James opened his mouth like he was going to say more, but he quickly shut it. He just stared at her from across the room, his chest heaving slightly. Lily had seen an angry James quite a few times, but there was something in his eyes that showed Lily he was more hurt than anything. 

“It’s not your fault,” Lily said, holding his gaze. 

“What isn’t?” he asked. 

“Me being weird,” she said, throwing her hands up.

“Explain it to me. Because one second you’re telling me I have a nice arse and the next, you can’t even look at me,” he said. 

As Lily stood across from James, she realized that there was no way out of this mess besides the truth. Lily didn’t know if she was ready to throw her cards down, but God, she couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Because I can’t stop thinking about you!” she yelled. “Every bloody day, I see girls tripping over themselves to get a scrap of your attention and I feel like I’m a fool!”

James’s jaw dropped as Lily fell silent. She felt heat rise in her cheeks and wishes she could stuff the words back into her mouth. 

“What changed?” James asked. It was so low, Lily almost didn’t hear it. His eyes kept her captivated. 

“A lot of things,” she replied. “Like the fact that you weren’t an utter tosser last year and this year.”

“You told me I was one quite a few times if I remember correctly,” James said, a smirk on his face. 

Lily smiled a little, despite the feeling that she messed something up between them. 

“It was different,” she said. “You just… know how to make people laugh, even when teasing them.”

James smiled, wide and bright and Lily finally looked away, choosing to stare out the window and look at the bright blue sky and fluffy clouds that were outside. 

“I don’t want to get hurt James,” she said. 

Lily felt him walk over. 

“Why do you think I’d ever hurt you, Evans?” he whispered from beside her. 

“Because you’ll realize there are better options out there,” she said. James snorted. 

“I have nothing against the other girls in Hogwarts, but I doubt there is anyone that could ever compare to you, Lily,” he said. “Especially to me.”

James placed a hand on her shoulder and Lily turned to look at him. He was still sweaty from Quidditch, his glasses were crooked, but Merlin, she had never seen a better sight. 

“Fancy a dinner in Hogsmeade?” he asked. She smiled. 

“Hogsmeade is in two weeks,” she pointed out. 

“I’m not waiting two weeks,” he said. “We don’t have patrols tonight. I’ll be ready in twenty, if you want to go with me that is.”

Lily hesitated for a second, not because of James, but because sneaking out. James seemed to get this. 

“You said yourself, ‘what’s a head girl without a little mischief?’” he pointed out. Lily smiled and nodded. 

Lily didn’t think James’s smile could get wider but it did.

“Give me twenty minutes!” he said, moving to turn around and rush to his dorm. 

“Wait a second,” she said, causing James to pause. 

Lily threw all caution to the wind . Just cupped James’s face and brought it down to hers, capturing it in a kiss that made Lily wish she had done this sooner.

[muffindaddystyles]

𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄𝐃

Author note: Mention of drugs, sickness and blood (if you're not comfortable with it don't read it) . It mighty be heart warming fluffyyyyyy.

You're his kitten. No matter the consequences you're. Cause even in his anger sometimes (which's rare and it's on the silly go-to's) he still sticks to that pet name because he met you like that under the bus stop's shelter in a heavy rain offered you an umbrella (while you were huffing and puffing like a kitten annoyed with the weather), walked you home, had a tea with you and some chocolate chip cookies. Been bestfriends from that year and there isn't a red light to your guys wild adventures—but he's been having a rough time recently. Had a cruel heart shattering breakup from a relationship that he thought was a never ending dream (she brought him happiness in a weird way he couldn't put into words) indeed it tightened your chest but his happiness's most important to you. To overcome it he's been scribbling notebooks over notebooks with lyrics that screams he miss her and the sex for the most part of it. It breaks your heart.

He's usually the one to melt all over you, give you forehead kisses, cuddles you when your periods are the bitchiest, makes you brekkie if he stays a night, runs you a bath and sometimes brings you pomegranate berried candles (he lies that he got them as a gift, he's one hell of a liar). He takes care of you with so much gentleness and helps you with study after wiping your tears and reassuring you telling you how proud he's of you. It made you guilty sometimes 'cos if you'd be in camille's place. . .you'd never be able not to get jealous. She was cool with it. Fills you with another curiosity that maybe she treated it like a fling.

He was devastated. Knocking on your door feebly. Then the moment your small confused body was under his weary gaze, boom!! It crashed upon him like a pitch storm and he fell to his knees tucking his head in your armpit crying his heart out. At that moment you felt his pain radiating to you and twisting your own stomach with a dagger, it was insufferable. He gave out no-deep scrapes but not to freak your bones muttered that he lost her. Eventually his bottled up emotions seeped into hues infront of you by passing week and to your littlest of information you got to know that they didn't ended up well in some perspectives so their relationship turned out to be a downfall. So As, you do with your girlie best-friend when she have a breakup you did it with Harry too. It didn't included feral clubbing (you left that part to his mates) but watching sappy movies that could fill your ice-cream bucket once you eat it whole, doing homemade face masks, playing drunk uno and knocking on your neighbours door to run way at last, dragging his arse to museum and in all of this you ended up convincing him to adopt a kitty (she lives with you thou).

The roles have been reversed completely!

He's been living at your flat for five weeks now. It's fading his usual cheekiness and the itch to annoy you every second he gets. Instead, it's just eating, spending bits of hours with you, going out with his mates and coming back to crash at your couch padding in your room in the wee of night demanding a warm coddle from you and that his back hurts from the cruelty of that single spring popping from the leather, staying with him when he'd wrench his stomach out in the morning. He's sensitive. His heart's soft that's one of the reason he gets hurt real quick, you admire that about him and reminds him that it's one of his qualities you're totally in love with. You're gentle with him. Giving him space and time to recover. Going with him at his friend's birthday little get together not drinking at all knowing one would have to stay sober as he chugged red wine staining his hawain shirt and when he clumsily poked his pink tongue out lazily to reach for the cigarette in her hand you tugged him back into you before he'd burn his tongue with sparkles announcing it's time to head back home and he'd be a pain in arse (a beautiful one though because his antics makes you all mushy) when he pretended to steal sandwiches from the table hiding them under his shirt saying that "'m pregnant with twins and it's hard to carry them" while you dragged him outside making him wear his coat like a stubborn toddler. Making him cupcakes sometimes, playing with his fluff of curls while he reads the book she gave him. It hurts. But, it subsides down with his single amiable glance that tells you he needs you. He always had. He always will. You give him extra forehead kisses and pecks on cheek while leaving for UNI, because it's irresistible to give dust to his pouty sulk.

It's seven in the morning when he tumbled through your door (has a key, you even brought his clothes and toothbrush from his house—he even uses your strawberry scented shampoo and body wash) his nose tip blushed matching his cheeks, eyes pooling with haze and hair poking in every direction. You were studying for a class you've in an hour. When you saw his irirses blown out you arched your brow putting the cup down beside your thick book, to mingle his sadness he's experimenting different fun wild things (told you bout it and you even called Mitch to take care of him).

"How many am I, pet?" You asked walking towards him seeing him struggle to get out of his vans and your giggles echoed into coldness when he peers down at your crouched state with his gold fish-y eyes, "dunno. . . but ye'r seem like. .like a-a sunflower floatin' in me head." His lips molding around his each word agonisingly slow drawl and his voice hoarse and scratchy. "You need rest, bambi." You got him out of his jeans and socks knowing he despises to sleep with layers on. "I'll be back with you in some hours. Hmm? Then we'll snuggle into blankets, you me and. . .salsa the pussy cat." You have to control your laugh everytime you take the kitty's name (Harry's worst at giving names you were horrified when he once joked that he loves chelsea boots so much he could name his daughter Chelsea) He whines at that nodding his head but not loosening his grip from around your wrist while you tucked him under your baby green patch work quilt. It's like his brain and heart can't decide how to choose.

On your way back you got Jeff's call asking why Harry isn't picking his phone his own voice resembling that of Harry's and you know he'd be looking shit at the time. Harry was still snoring out like a bulb in bright day on his tummy and you shook him gently at first but when he didn't woke up you had to be a bit harsher. "Harry wake up pet. . . Jeff's been calling ye for since." But, not even a hum in response so you placed your finger under his nose checking if he's even alive. Gratefully he was just sleeping like a literal corpse (he argues that he isn't that bad of a sleeper but in fact he is. Everything around him would burn down and he wouldn't even change a side).

It was seven in the evening when you were preparing for dinner when he woke up grumpy. His nose scrunched up, lips quirked up as if he tasted something yucky and his gait jello. You eyed him quietly even when he came in kitchen to drink water.

"Jeff was callin'. . ." You quipped stirring the veggies before pouring soup into a bowl and sliding it his way on the counter, "I know bombarded me phone with calls—" He gruffed spooning a mouthful and you flinched when he tried to cool it inside his mouth with "hawahhoohaha" little sounds (he knew it was hot, he's just an impatient leech).

"Stop being a gremlin. He told me ye' aren't writing, leaving everything like a cliffhanger neither you're attending the meetings he calls you at. . . I think you're done with your mourning it's time to do what you actually love and is there for you. Your music." You frown seriously trying to put some senses into his forever high brain. He drops the spoon back and dips his brows frustratedly, pinching his eyes shut.

"Fuckin' hell. Stop being my mama!" It's not the first time you guys are arguing and you're not gonna take it to heart. You stood up towering him and jabbing your finger to his chest, "you better stop filling your system with drugs before eighteen year olds come to you thinking you're a drug dealer—" He snickers at that a total mocking one (you know he's doing nothing hard it's just shrooms in the safe environment otherwise you'd have never never allowed him) but still you had to bring him back to his line so it was necessary. "Piss off." He mutters still slurping on his soup and you left him there with a loud smack on his head, "Wanker."

You care about him. Always did. Always will. He's the love of your life. Even your love has nourishment of just water and lacks sunshine from your sun it's still there into existence, how could you see him like this? Wasting his precious time and energy. It's impossible.

All you heard before going to deep slumber was the tinsy creak of your main door after that it was silent and darkness until now your phone buzzed under your pillow resonating Niall's tired words. You were a wreck havoc fumbling for your coat and wallet, covering pathway to tube with shivering legs hallucinating that everyone's eyeing your fiddly self with judgemental stare even though there're few.

You rushed to Niall's doorsteps knocking like a maniac, "where's he? Is he okay? told ye—" You pushed him aside marching inside to look for him. "He looked fine, he's a strong guy y/n they took him to hospital." You snaps your neck raising your brows.

"What the fuck, d'ya mean hospital!?" Your heart hammering in her ribcage overthinking the worst scenarios. "Take me there. right. fuckin' now." You tell him firmly not caring even if he's high too. Niall leads you to his car heating it up in the first beat taking glances of your petite body leaning against the glass with lips sucked in, eyes watered and legs constantly on bounce so placed his hand atop your knee giving you reassuring squeeze and a genial smile.

Your pink cheeks warming up with the heat of hospital radiating your way and loud growl left your chest when your blurry vision cleared to the sight of dishelved Harry sitting on the bench outside of ER, his irirses weary, mouth stuffed with cotton and has few scratches of rashes on his elbows otherwise he's fine. With each step of yours towards him something kept breaking inside you like you're walking on the nails and it's ripping you raw. He raised his head timidly hearing footsteps and when his eyes fell over your worried state panic flashed over his features and his only gaze turned you a puddling emitting heavy sobs within you before reaching towards him. The reality of situation dawning upon you because from what Niall told you in the car that they were high trying to have some fun, drove around neighbour hood and Harry jumped out of the window and bit his tongue between his teeth resulting in heavy bleeding a deep gnash (the fuckin' dumbstick he is).

"I hate you. I hate you so fuckin' much! you bastard." You tried to shout at him but the voice that came out of your mouth was that of mice as you threw harsh blows at his chest, bottom lip jutting wet and salty tears tricking down. He wraps his hand around your wrists ushering you closer down to his chest speaking muffled, "'orry." causing you to grunt angrily into the crook of his neck.

"Sorry my ass!" When you tried to pull back he tightened his hold round your neck snuggling you warmly to him with a hum. Jeff came back with medicines and when he parted his lips to speak in his defence you ignored him wiping your tears with the heel of your palms muttering a, "I hate you guys." The drive back was silent and the walk to your flat too, you passed by him to lock yourself into your room (you wouldn't because of the fact you wouldn't be able to sleep if not sure he's okay few feets away from you). When Harry attempted to roll his tongue to make some words nothing came out but a hiss making you spin, "'s okay we'll speak in the mornin'." Saying this you headed to bed and when you were bout to turn the lamp off he was lurking at the foot of your bed with a pillow in his arms smushing his face into it and squeezing it close to his chest gesticulating you that he wants a cuddle.

"Only 'cos y're adorable." You muttered moving your bum to make space for him suppressing your cooe when he grinned showing nothing but snow cotton, fuckin' hell being this cute should be illegal! He snapped his finger to call Salsa and she instantly galloped to shrink into his side while you spooned him. You woke up to the running tap and the time you were stretching under your quilt with yawns he padded out looking healed than last night.

He got a little lisp as he spoke, "can we talk?" You nodded knuckling at your sticky eyes criss-crossing your legs. "'Forgive me kitten." He continues, "sorry fo' mistreatin' ye' last night." You shake your head not realizing tears are dropping down your collarbones.

"Please. . .I don't wanna be a party-pooper in your life. you can live your life to finest but not at the sake of your life Harry– and. . . and if you're trying to invade the feelin' of sadness with all of this I don't approve it. What bout me? dunno what'll do if somethin' will happen to you, pet. S'not fair to me. is it? Just. . . love y—" your confessions cameflouging with sobs.

"Oh baby. ." He immediately cradled you in his embrace trying to soothe you with 'sorrys' and 'I'll never do somethin' like that again, promise'. Smooching slobery kisses all over your face and when you gazed up at him attracting him closer to your clean warm features all he did was peck the corner of your lips tenderly pulling away to pat your hair with a sigh.

"So. . .ye' love me." He teased you and you rolled your eyes grabbing his chin with your fingers, "show me your tongue." biting down your laugh when he retorted misheviously, "hmm. Wanna kiss it better?" Blowing him off with a remark that he's an utter pervert hiding the fact it splashed crimson to your neck.

"Mind makin' me poor self some brekkie?" He pouts and you giggled pecking the corner of his burgundy lips getting a timid smile in return, "in trade of?" He hip-checked you straddling Salsa over his shoulder and grabbing her little paws to expertise her in some dancey-dance moves.

"Mind bloggin' orgasm–ique dinner." He cackled loudly at the end when you shook your head in fake disappointment at him and he clinged by your side helping you to make some breakfast.

Think so you guys will figure it out.

[beyoncesdragon]

Graham Norton (Harry Styles x Reader)

Requested: No.

Warnings: I've written this ages ago. that should be warning enough.

My Masterlist this can also be found on my Wattpad

The Boys of One Direction were recently on Graham Norton, and I was the last guest he would call on stage. I was slightly nervous, my palms wet and I had to prevent myself from chewing my lipstick off. I had been looking forward to that show and also sharing my time with the boys of One Direction. I had seen them only once and very brief, backstage at the VMA's last year and since then they but also my career had skyrocketed even more. Which was very nice, sure, but it also added a bit more nerves and pressure. Adding to that, I had just released my second studio album which I had not talked in public before. I rubbed my palms over my pants. My eyes trailed nervously through the room I waited for my cue, landing on the large mirror. I got up and carefully pushed untameable curls back. I had them pulled into a tight ponytail, so that they just gently touched my shoulders and wouldn't give me the opportunity to play with it. Which was a nervous habit of mine and my media-trainer had told me many times to stop with it. My critical eyes wandered down my outfit: simple white, double breasted pants which accentuated the waist nicely. The silky tie-neck blouse with the button cuffs was tucked in and the light creamy pink colour went nicely with my hair and the pants. For shoes I had decided on heels, subtle ankle-strap beauties in a nude rose. The whole outfit was elegant but not too muh, still comfortable and pretty much wardrobe malfunction proof.

I snapped up when I suddenly heard Graham's slightly muffled voice saying my name. Carefully I walked towards the door, staring into the still dark hallway towards stage. I had asked for privacy until my cue, means that my manager wouldn't have to stick around please. Just a young woman who had introduced herself as Gracie and would pick me up at my cue, but she wasn't even in sight yet. Graham seemed to simply talk about me to the boys... „She is waiting, yes. Don't worry Harry, we will bring her out soon." Loud laughter and whistling broke out and it swallowed the young mans answer. "So you guys now her? Except for Harry, obviously." Again, muffled laughter. "Yes we know her. As you said correctly, especially Harry. You could say that he's a fan." I heard Liam say, and the crowd awed. I felt my cheeks heating up slightly, a nervous chuckle escaping my lips. "Yeah it's been known..." Harry now said, sounding a bit embarrassed. „She's amazing; I can't blame you Harry. Wonderful voice, and wonderful face!" Graham said. A small smirk stole itself on my lips. "She is." Harry agreed. „She just recently started to follow him on Instagram. The lad almost started to cry." I could heard Louis and the crowd awed again. "I didn't!" Harry exclaimed quickly, embarrassment clearly evident in his voice. "You did. When he heard that she's on show with us, he totally freaked out. Stop lying." I meant to understand the heavy Yorkshire accent of Zayn. "Oh really? Well we can surely get you her number if you want to...or do you want to break into her dressing room...?" Graham jokingly suggested and I grinned. That wouldn't even be too bad...I mean it was Harry Styles. Pretty wonderful boy inside and out, everyone disagreeing was just in denial. Loud laughter was the reaction. "Oh good lord..." I could hear Harry groaning. "Shoot your shot mate!" Louis cheered jokingly, but Harry seemed not to answer anything on it. At least not something I could hear. "She can't hear us, right?" Niall asked and I felt like I could hear him grinning. A shocked gasp from probably Harry was heard. „She can't right?!" he then asked in turmoil, sounding clearly stressed out. Oh if he only knew...In this moment Gracie appeared in the hallway, waving at me. I quickly took a deep breath before mincing nervously towards her. "Wait here." Gracie said with a calming smile, pointing at a corner. The audience was now loud and I could see light falling from on stage into the dimmed hallway. "Well..." I could hear Graham say. „There's only one way to find it out. Please everybody welcome the absolutely gorgeous..." This second Gracie was back, shoving me gently around the corner towards the curtained doorframe. "Watch the step and don't trip. Good luck!" she whispered and I could only quickly thank her before stepping out into the spotlight. The crowd had rose to their feet, as well as Graham and the other guests. Even though the sudden bright light blinded me and prevented me from seeing the crowd in its full number, I could hear how loud it was. There must be many people...Graham rushed towards me in excitement, greeting me how exactly I saw it on the many interviews I had watched on YouTube. "Ooh, ooh it's beautiful to have you!" he said excitedly, smiling bright before embracing me in a hug. Laughing I returned his hug, kissing his cheek softly. „Thank you for having me!" I said loudly, my microphone was now on. I quickly glanced back towards the crowd, seeing now how many faces were watching me. I waved excitedly, a honest smile on my face. The boys were all still standing for me and I quickly turned towards them to greet them. Harry was first in line so I went up to him firstly. The hug was accompanied with loud cheering and I grinned softly. Especially when Harry kept his arms around me a bit longer than I expected him to, but I didn't mind at all. Despite my heels was he taller than me, way broader and smelled exceptionally good. Just as I thought that, I already inwardly scolded myself, even though it was not something unusual to think. I had talked about that with my bestfriend often enough to know that I surely wasn't the only person on earth, to which a good smell was a sign of attractiveness. After maybe five seconds Louis and Zayn started to whistle and Harry let go, his cheeks slightly flushed. Cute, very cute actually. After I hugged Louis, Liam, Zayn and Niall, I froze for a second, not knowing where I should sit. The couch was pretty stuffed already and I had no idea where they wanted me to fit in. But before I could even to start panicking, Zayn and Niall scooted apart and offering me to sit between them. I gave them a thankful smile, trying to sit down as graceful as possible. „So welcome, welcome! How are you feeling?" Graham asked excitedly after everyone had taken their seats again. „Oh I am feeling very well. Was a bit nervous before, but I heard you talking about me so nicely when I was backstage..." I teased, glancing over at Harry, whose face dropped before a smug smirk flit over his lips. The crowd went ballistic at that and Graham chuckled amused. "It's not soundproof then huh." Harry remarked, a hint of a blush on his cheeks. "Nope." I popped the p with a little grin, slowly shaking my head. "Means that your plan on taking her backstage won't quite work now." Louis remarked, a lazy grin on his lips as he leaned back. I laughed out loud like everyone else in the studio. Except Harry of course. He had his face buried in his hands, shaking his head. "Just sod off Louis, sweet Jesus." Graham had his lips pursed, sending him a look. "The right thing to say would've been 'no I wasn't planning on doing anything like that' but you didn't. Does that mean you agree?" Harry just stared at him. "I want to go home, please somebody help." I chuckled amused, scanning the little table for my drink. I had told Graham's manager that I would just like some iced water. When I found it I leaned forwards, at the exact same second as Harry leaned forward to grab his drink. "Look at that...they now act the same. Ladies and Gentlemen we aren't even ten minutes in with our last guest and we already have all this..." Graham struggled to find the correct word, but a smug Louis was quick to help out. "Tension?" he suggested and Graham nodded in agreement. "Exactly, this tension in the studio! Amazing, truly." I felt heat creeping up my cheeks as I shook my head. "Moving on!" I said before taking a big gulp from my water. Everybody chuckled amused and Harry shot me an apologising look. I just shrugged slightly, giving him a warm smile. "Hey, no soul-mate communication here!" Liam exclaimed dramatically and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "Alright, let's not ignore your wish, shall we. How about we talk about your new album?" Graham suggested, immediately inserting the cover shoot of my album. "Called Aubade, I hope I pronounced that correctly. It looks amazing however." Graham said and a agreeing murmur went through the room. "Thank you, and yeah you said that right." Graham tilted his head. "What does it actually mean then?" I sat up straighter, placing my hands neatly on my lap. I was really nervous about talking about the album now. "Well an aubade is a love song, sung at dawn. It's like the contrary of a serenade which is a love song sung during evening twilight for example." Graham's face lit up in understanding. "I feel a bit embarrassed that I didn't knew that but oh well. So what is it all about? I mean there aren't only love songs, just a few actually." I nodded slowly. "Right. It's actually...well its also a very melancholic album. There are many very personal songs on it, very sensitive and not always relying on something positive. But I feel like love isn't always positive as well, so that's quite alright." Graham and the boys wordlessly started to clap after my statement. "Very true. Have you got a favourite song for yourself?" Graham asked and I shrugged. "I don't even know...I mean, I love all of them. I think that it very much depends on the mood you are in." Graham nodded. "Question for the boys; have you listened to the album already? And you don't have to lie." He added playfully and I grinned. "I actually really have. Honestly, I  think its pretty bloody brilliant if I may say so." Louis spoke up and I gave him a thankful smile. "Thank you dear." Graham rose a warning finger at me. "Ah Miss, don't you start flirting with Louis, Harry might get jealous." Harry scoffed, looking up in fake annoyance. "God's sake can you lay off of it already!" he sighed and I grinned. "I am sorry darling." I added with a teasing smile, which he returned nonchalantly. "No problem. I, by the way also think that the album is brilliant. I think my favourite song on it is 'minutiae'. It's really beautiful." I gave him a surprised smile. "Really? I like that one as well, greatly. Wonderful song to write and warm your voice up." Harry nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah I can see that." Graham watched up amusedly. "For everyone who hasn't listened to the song yet; does one of you want to explain...?" I exchanged a quick look with Harry. "You do it. I am curious on how you interpret it." I then said, seeing Harry nervously shuffling his feet. "I mean if you like...okay. So in my mind, minutiae is a song about paying attention to the little, more hidden details in life. Like for example the tiny specks of colour in everybody's eyes, or those subtle facial expressions that don't last for a second but still are there. Or maybe the melody of somebody's voice, or how they talk when they are excited about something. Or all those nervous habits you might pick up when you watch closely...I am sorry I trailed off." Harry ended, a slightly embarrassed expression on his face. But I couldn't help but stare at him in adoration. All the things he had mentioned were so true, never had I ever heard someone talking about a song I wrote, recorded with my voice, and being so passionate about it. "Dear good, look at her, completely in awe." Graham laughed amusedly and I quickly hid my face behind my drink. "That was beautiful, exactly like I would've had explained it." His eyes sparkled happily a blissful smile on his lips. "Oh come on lovebirds!" Zayn suddenly exclaimed before he grabbed my your waist and carefully picked you up. He then placed me gently next to Harry, giving us a fake annoyed look. Niall laughed and nudged Harry's shoulder. „A dream came true...and now hug, will you!" he added with a teasing wink. I grinned, feeling very nervous once again. I then slowly and very, very cautious leaned towards Harry who immediately pulled one Arm around me and pressed me against his chest. I giggled and everyone was awing and applauding. Niall coughed, faking a hurt expression „Now, I feel lost. I love you and your music too" he said as, stretching his arm towards me. „Aw no..." I started and reached out to his hand. But Harry snatched it and didn't let go of it. „Nah. Mine." he snapped. Everyone laughed.

[zwiezraczek]

Love The Way You Lie [Blurb]

8. “Why are you doing this to me?” 11. “You're driving me crazy, you know that?” 20. “I think I just found somebody to love.”

Warnings: unhealthy relationship, violence mentionned

Inspired by Love The Way You Lie - Eminem

 ~~~

You gulped the bottle, laughing, feeling the alcohol pulsing through your veins as the music grew louder and louder. Mutants clubs, the best clubs. But what was even more beautiful in all of this, was the illegal part: mutants were indeed illegal, their clubs? Illegal. Their existence? Illegal. Their games? Illegal. And this was why you loved to stay there, with your bestfriend, dancing until your feet hurt and your head filled with alcohol and dirty thoughts, until your hands slid under somebody's t-shirt, until you could feel alive, again.

And as the lights flickered above your head, you noticed them. These majestic white wings in the darkness, surrounded by various persons, dancing girls next to them, lazily brushing against them and the man owning them. His beautiful and mesmerizing eyes. He had a drink in his hand, a girl in the other, sitting on his lap, giggling and smiling as she touched the angelic curls on his head. But his eyes were looking at you right now, and the only thing you could think about was him. Only him.

Lust danced between you, as you swayed your way through the crowd to find yourself in front of him, before he could have a better look at you. You were sparkling, seductive, a temptress. And he looked like a fallen angel, with his burning eyes and his white wings. He had toyed enough with the girl on his lap, and asked her to leave, and so she did, not pleased to see you being his new center of attention.

“I think I just found somebody to love,” he declared, after drinking a sip of his beer. His eyes devouring you with one glance from above.

“You sure pretty boy,” you asked, while smirking, “I'm pretty handful to be with. Not sure you could handle me...”

“Let's find out, doll.” With a gesture of his hand, he invited you on his lap, and you couldn't refuse. And as you sat up there, he began to kiss your neck, roughly, lustily, with passion. His skin pressed against yours, as you gasped from time to time. “See? I'm doing great.”

“I'm not so sure,” you moaned as he licked your collarbone, your hand softly toying with his t-shirt. “I've seen bett... Oh my god,” you exhaled as he made you feel alright, just by kissing your neck.

“Maybe better than you thought, doll.” His expert hands wandered all around your body, his wings wrapping around both of you, your moans only for his ears, nobody else.

“You're driving me fucking crazy,” you panted, looking at him with a sparkle in your eyes. He probably was the one.

“So do you, doll.”

~~~

You became what some could call lovers, what others could call sex friends, but whatever you had was a game. The game to know which one of you could drag the other towards the edge, the edge of common sense and the edge of sanity. Aggressiveness rising as you kissed that boy, his body pressed against yours and his hands moving gently on your hips, your rage exploding when a girl's tongue wandered on his collarbone, him holding her close and marking her neck. Always eyes on each other, to see which one would break the first. There was no pattern, but everything always ended in a fight. Either you going out, yelling names at him, waiting in the apartment you shared and breaking glasses while he came back, crying, raging and telling him to fuck off, either him going absolutely batshit, trying almost to kill the guy being with you, pining you up against the wall as you looked at him with your provocative eyes.

“Why are you doing this to me,” he asked, your jaw in his right hand. It hurt, it absolutely hurt how much his fingers were into your skin as he held your face to force you to look at him.“Answer, bitch!”

“Because you agreed, motherfucker,” you would reply, scents of alcohol in your voice as many as in his own. You'd go through the pain, as always, he'd apologize, you'd apologize.

“Don't you fucking toy with me, you're mine,” he would exclaim, the attention suddenly driven towards the two of you, his wings sharpening at their ends, you could hear their hissing. You knew these could make you bleed, and they did and not only once. But you made them bleed too, not once, with some broken glass.

“I'm not a pet of yours, Warren,” you whispered, confident as you felt that breathing became difficult. You smiled nevertheless.

“But you are fucking mine, either you want it or no, and I'll fucking kill whoever tries to fuck around with you. You heard that,” you couldn't tell if he was speaking to you, or to the guys gathered around you as he let you go. Your jaw hurt, it would leave some bruises in the morning. But who cared? You won the game tonight, you won this round and that was all that matter.

“So how about showing me I'm all yours then, Warren Worthington the Third,” your cooed, looking at him. Your makeup was flawed, tears which ran on your face when he chocked you made you look like a small hurt panda, but you were lust on legs to him, with that face or without.

“You're driving me crazy doll, you really do,” he whispered, his hand against the wall, just right to your ear. His wings softened a bit, you touched them, carelessly because you knew how much it helped him to relax, to be turned on.

You were sure of one thing during that night: you won the most outrageous and passionate night, only to yourself. With Warren, a man capable of making you scream for any reason.

~~~

His burning rage met your limits on that night. You spat on his face, as he grabbed your arm telling you that you had to stay there, he punched a hole in the wall next to your head. You felt scared, but also impressed. But you told him that you were leaving, for whatever reason, and as you slammed the door you heard him screaming, hitting the door endlessly. But letting you go. You stood there, in the hallway, hearing him burn. You heardshattering of glass, how many glasses you broke together while in this sick relationship? You had your head between your fingers, crying. You felt helpless. You loved him, he loved you, this sick game of yours was the best thing that could have happened to you both. But that was consuming you, destroying sometimes. But you loved it the way it was.

As you sat in the dark corridor, after a dozen of minutes, you heard the door open. You saw light, and him. His wings struggling to pass through the door as always, looking like an angel in the moonlight, only shorts on and his torso on display. He offered you his hand, eyes tired and puffy from crying too. You knew everything was hurting you, you knew he was hurt, you knew you were hurting you, but this weird exchange of energy suited youboth. You took his hand, and entered the apartment, watching out to not step on some glass.

“Doll it wasn't you, it was me,” he assured, stroking your hair as you laid your head on his lap, slowly not sobbing anymore. “And maybe our relationship isn't as crazy at it seems...”

“It's fucking us,” you corrected him, rising your eyes on him. “We're driving each other crazy for nothing, watching ourselves burn as we push each other's buttons...”

“This is what happens when a tornado meets a volcano, doll,” he delicately whispered, looking at you. “I can barely breathe when I'm not with you, doll. I can't fucking get you out my mind, you know that doll?” You nodded, feeling exactly the same. “So don't move doll, and close your eyes.”

You rose, looking at him in confusion. This wasn't Warren at all, it wasn't how he worked. He urged you to close your eyes before leaving you, alone, on the couch, hands covering your eyes. You heard him walking carefully to not make his feet bleed on the glass he broke earlier, before he opened a drawer and closed it. Curiosity shook your whole body as you heard him being close, the sound of his wings right next to you, their soft touch brushing your bare shoulders.

“Open your eyes doll.”

And he knelt in front of you, looking at your tired and puffy face from crying. A small box, with a ring in his hands.

“All I know is that I love you too much to leave you walk away from me, doll. All I know is that rage takes us over sometimes, controls us, but I also know that we love each other.”

“Yes,” you replied before he could ask you anything. “Warren yes.”

“Let me finish,” he said, looking at you with these glistening eyes. “I love you, y/n, and I want to marry you; with or without these little game of ours I don't fucking care, I just wantto be with you, doll.”

“Yes Warren, I agree, I love you too,” you kissed his forehead gently, your hand caressing his wings first, and then his cheek. “I'd be honored to become Mrs. Worthington.”

[yeolsmuffin]

Anxiety - Kyungsoo

“You wouldn't let go of him and he wouldn't let you let go.”

Genre: Fluff & Angst | bestfriend!kyungsoo, requested. (anixtey trigger warning?)

Pairing: kyungsooXreader

Word Count: 2.4k

♫Third installment of my OYA request gifts♫

Anonymous said:Best friend AU featuring EXO Kyungsoo. When both parties are in relationships but their significant other doesn’t accept how close main character and Kyunsoo are. Angst. I would like you to choose where this goes either they turn into lovers or something else. Thank you :)

“I don't know what to do with you anymore," he said with a sigh as his eyes closed tightly. "Everything I do makes you cry and nothing I say can make it stop."

You tried to control the cries that riddled your body as you held a hand to your mouth. "What do you mean you don't know what to do?" You cried out at him from where you were curled up in a ball on the couch.

He pointed at you, "Exactly that. I don't know what to do. Your panic attacks just get worse by the day and I can't figure it out."

"You don't try to figure it out," you lashed out as your fingers found their place on your bicep. Your nails curved into the skin without hesitation and you forced them into your skin as harshly as you could. You needed the pain. You needed something to balance out the mess that you were in.  

He scoffed. "You run off to him before I even get the chance to try," he accused as his voice raised.

It was this same way every time you fought with your boyfriend of three years. In fact, it was this same way if you fought or if you had a panic attack and normally a panic attack is what caused a fight. You couldn't control what set you off, you never could and that was something you made clear to him before the two of you even started dating. Your boyfriend assured you that he was ready to help you tackle your anxiety and that it was worth it but the further the two of you went into your relationship, the more it seemed like a lie.  

Everyone was so afraid of your anxiety and it always made you laugh because while they were afraid of it, they never had to look it in the eyes the way you did. They weren't fighting with it. If they had to deal with the mental battles you did, maybe then would they truly be afraid. They had no idea what true fear was.

You loved your boyfriend. Loved him so much that it hurt but lately, you wondered how much hurt you could take before you were broken even worse. Your childhood ruined you and shaped you into the fearful adult you were but how much further could you get broken?

You just wanted someone to accept you and your anxiety because it wasn't like it was going anywhere anytime soon. There was one person who did accept your anxiety though and that one person was the only one who could pull you from darkness when you couldn't seem to find a light. The one person who-

"What? I mentioned him and now you have nothing to say?" He spat.

You hadn't realized you were hyperventilating until you felt your lungs tighten in your chest. You were ready to spiral. Too far stressed about your boyfriend and the painful memories he had brought up less than thirty minutes ago. He thought talking about your past was some sick was to help you but it never did. If you wanted to talk about it, wouldn't you bring it up?

"You always run off to him before I get the chance to help-"

You cut him off. "Are you kidding me? How long do I stay like this before I go to him for help? How many hours do you want me struggling to breathe before I get some help? I suffer for as long as I can before reaching out to him. All you do is stare at me and ask me why I'm crying. I've told you what I needed before. I've told you how you can help me but you don't care. You think comforting me will enable me to be like this even more."

"How am I supposed to know what to do to fix you? I didn't sign up for your anxiety Y/N. I didn't get a choice in that-"

Laughing bitterly, you came to a shaky stand. You could feel pain aching from your biceps from where you had carved crescent moons into them with your nails. "You think I get a choice? You think I would be like this if I could help it?"

"You haven’t tried to change. You haven't worked on it. You've been progressively gotten worse and it's because you don't want to do anything about it."

Time felt like it stopped as you stared at your boyfriend. The same one you slowly and happily fell in love with over the course of three years. The same one who promised that your mental disorder would never be a match for his feelings. He looked at you with spite now. His loving eyes nowhere to be found.

If anxiety was a choice, you would have closed the door on it years ago but it wasn't up to you. Anxiety kept the door wide open no matter how roughly you grabbed the knob and pulled. Anxiety was going to ruin your relationship and you wondered if that was the worst thing in the world. Maybe having the mental illness wasn't your choice but at least it weeded out those who couldn't handle loving you for who you were and your boyfriend seemed to be one of those.

He watched you pull the ring from your finger that he had gotten you as an anniversary present. Still shaky and slightly sobbing, you held it out to him. He cringed away. "What are you doing?"

"Here is your choice. If you don't want my anxiety, you can walk away."

He froze, not knowing how to react as you forced the ring into his hand.

"Go ahead. Escape it while you can," you nodded to him as you closed his fingers around it. "I'm sure I would do the same if given the chance."

Slipping your shoes on, you heard his voice call something out to you. You turned around and he repeated himself more clearly as he looked down at the ring in his hands. "Are you going to him?"

"What scares you more? My anxiety or my friendship with Kyungsoo?"

When he didn't answer, you knew the answer yourself. It had to be a mixture of both. Kyungsoo was your best friend since you were younger and while things always remained platonic, your boyfriend always held a high sense of jealousy when anything included Kyungsoo. Although Kyungsoo himself was in a four-year-long committed relationship, it didn't stop your boyfriend's suspicions. When your panic attacks got the best of you and you couldn't find it in you to calm down, he's who you went to. Kyungsoo was where you found your sanity.  

That was probably why he was so jealous. Kyungsoo understood your anxieties in ways your boyfriend never tried to. That's why he would be the one you called during the early hours of the morning when you couldn't stop the impending doom that seemed to be happening.

Your boyfriend was never happy when Kyungsoo would show up unannounced to take you away from the tight confines of the house and no matter what you said in your defense, he never believed things were platonic.

You couldn't help Kyungsoo was the remedy for your fear.

His girlfriend also seemed to react the same as your boyfriend. She would glare at you when she would find you tucked into Kyungsoo's bed in the morning when she would visit. You could hear the way she accused the two of you and the way Kyungsoo begged her not to go. She went as far as ignoring your presence when you were around but no matter how bad things with your significant others got, you and Kyungsoo stayed by each other's side.

You wouldn't let go of him and he wouldn't let you let go.  

At the end of the day, Kyungsoo was your best friend first.

And he was exactly who you called the moment you stepped outside of your front door. He answered halfway through the second ring and seeing as it was late at night, he didn't bother greeting you and instead said, "I'm on my way," as you heard rustling in the background.

Instantly, your heart slowed down even though tears were still falling from your eyes.

He was there in exactly seven and a half minutes looking frantic as ever as he scooped you up from your place on the stairs and took you to his car.

His hand found yours as he drove you back to his place. "You're okay," he assured as his thumb rubbed over the back of your hand. "You're okay."

Your emotions weren't as heightened as they were before and you found yourself less emotional. Even though you had pretty much broken up with your boyfriend, you felt as if a weight had been lifted instead of adding weight to your shoulders.

You could feel Kyungsoo watching you carefully as he drove you back to his place and only when you were finally tucked into his bed once again, did you see his shoulders relax and some of the tension leave his body. He crawled up next to you and pulled you into his arms. He brushed some fallen hair away from your face, "How did he upset you this time?"

A sigh escaped your lips. "It started off with some of the stuff that happened when I was younger and then led into a fight about my anxiety."

Kyungsoo narrowed his eyes. "What about it?"

"He told me that I'm choosing to be like this. That I haven't tried to change."

Rage passed over Kyungsoo and you forced him to stay down when he tried to get up. "I should kill him."

Shaking your head, you gazed up at him. "Don't bother. He said he didn't get a choice with my anxiety, so I gave him a choice." You showed off your bare hand to him and he gasped. When he opened his mouth to speak, you cut him off. "Think about it this way, if I could run away from this, I would too. So I get it. I get why he doesn't want to be around me like this. I don't want to be around me like this."

"But I do," Kyungsoo replied instantly. "I want to be around you when you are like this. I want to be the one you come to knowing I can help you. Sure, I don't want you to go through the mental torture you go through but my choice is to be by your side so you don't have to go through it alone."

A smile spread across your lips as you tucked yourself further into Kyungsoo. "Nobody will ever compare to you."

He laughed softly. "I'm glad. Nobody will ever compare to you either, you know that?"

You rolled your eyes. "I've made your life so difficult, Kyungsoo." You sighed. "Your girlfriend will be furious to know that you picked me up once again."

"First of all, nobody controls me. You are my priority and I broke up with her two weeks ago-" he stopped you from interrupting him. "Second, you haven't made my life difficult. When will you give yourself some credit? You see yourself as this big burden with all this anxiety and fear but all I see is someone who is so strong. Your mind is set in a constant state of panic and while you always feel it, I don't always see it in you. That takes pure strength. You've made my life colorful. I've seen things differently because of you. You've made me think about things more carefully and see things in a light I've never seen them in. To you, your anxiety is like a monster and while sometimes it is, sometimes your anxiety is useful."

"That is the craziest thing I've ever heard in my life," you stated. "the only thing it's good for is running people out of my life."

He shook his head. "That's not all. Sure, it's good to get rid of anyone who isn't in your life for you but it's more than that. You make me think before making stupid decisions like driving without a seatbelt. You remind me to say I love you at the end of each phone call. You are the reason that I appreciate every sunset and sunrise. I know you worry about it all the time. I know you worry about everything and because of that, it makes everything so much more worth it when it goes right."

"My anxiety isn't a positive thing, Kyungsoo," you reminded him even though his words were touching you in all the right places.

"It had brought us together hasn't it?" He asked as his hand found its place on your cheek. "That's enough for me to see it positively sometimes."

You could feel your cheek burning from where his skin touched. "I will never find anyone like you," you groaned to yourself.

"Did you break up with him?"

You nodded slowly.

"You don't have to then."

You furrowed your brows as Kyungsoo looked at you fiercely. "Don't have to what Kyungsoo? You're not making any sense."

"You don't have to find anyone like me because you can have me."

You felt your body start to shake as you saw the pure determination in his eyes. "What are you saying?"

Kyungsoo's fingers tapped gently against your cheeks. "I'm saying that not only do I love your anxiety, but I love you. I've been fooling myself for so long. I've been telling myself I'm not the best person for you but the more time passes the more I realize that's not true. I am the best person for you as long as you want me too."

It was then that your anxiety went full force in your brain. It made your pulse race and your lips tremble as obsessive questions attacked you. Worries bombarded you but the more you stared at Kyungsoo, the more you could filter the bad thoughts. The more Kyungsoo looked at you with love, the more your anxiety was being shut up.

Kyungsoo hadn't been the only one fooling himself. There was a reason he was the only one with the key to shutting down your anxiety and that was because you loved him too.

Pushing all the anxiety aside that you could, you pressed your lips to Kyungsoo's and felt the world around you calm down when he kissed you back.

So sometimes your anxiety helped you the way Kyungsoo did.  

Sometimes it saved your life the same way Kyungsoo always did.

OYA masterlist

this was supposed to be super angsty but turned into more of a story about anxiety than one about angst. I’d say sorry but I feel kind of proud of it! I hope you enjoyed, anon! I feel bad that maybe I took in in a different direction than you may have wanted but this is what happened when I worked on it the past few days.

[istgimamess]

Label: yg entertainment

Stage name: Barbie

Debut year: 2014 (4yrs active)

Debut concept: sexy, dark, story driven, rap and dance heavy, hip hop/pop track!

Number of members: 1(solo artist)

Group name: you go by your stage name, Barbie!

Fandom name: bb's

Position: main dancer, vocal, rap and visual; basically everything (because you rock!)

Male bestie: Yukhei (NCT)

How you meet: you hurt eachother both physically and emotionally, and then laughed about it. Alot! It was a normal day, you had just returned from dance practice and you were kind of exhausted; so you weren't paying that much attention to your surroundings! And then, let's just say, you hit a wall. Literally! Knees buckling, foreheads banging, elbows stabbing eachother in the stomachs - you struggled to break free. "Oh my freakin- you broke my face!! My face is broken!! What the hell is your forehead made out of?!! Bricks?!" "Well, I wouldn't of had to break your face if you had just watched where you were going, you frat-boy looking douche!" There was a long pause, some intense eye contact and then you both were cracking up; red faced and both clutching your stomachs, you managed to introduce yourselves! You've been attached at the hip ever since! You both have 4D personalities and you both love to make people laugh! You're 100x more extra when you're with eachother! Like Bonnie and Clyde, Tom and Jerry - you have eachothers back but always tease eachother constantly! He quickly becomes one of your best friends! He also gets oddly really protective of you, in a funny way, and his band mates like to tease him to see his reaction! "Hmm, I think my girl crush would have to be Barbie! She's really sexy!" "...(delayed reaction) Wait, what!? (^..gif..^)..who just said that!?? I'll stab you in the eye with a fork!!.." Even though he uses humor to mask how much he dislikes other people talking about you, you know if it came down to it, he would genuinely put someone in their place for you! Your friendship is the sweetest! (*sob*.. my 4D son!)

Female bestie: Lisa (Black Pink)

How you meet: you meet through dance! You had started taking more and more dance classes and workshops after your debut and occasionally you would meet new people in those classes! Long story short, she "accidently" caught you off gaurd after practice one day and you might have turned around and kicked her in the shin in a desperate attempt to "defend" yourself. You apologized over and over again but she just wouldn't stop laughing and take your apology, "hahahahhahahahaha you call that self defense?! You looked like a rabid bunny...I'm sorry hahahhaha...I can't stop laughing...hahaha.." "HA! Hilarious. Laugh it up..." She ends up choking which makes you laugh hysterically, until both of you are just a mess of giggles. You quickly end up bonding over your love for dance and food! And it became kind of a game between you two, on who could sneak up and scare the other more: at award shows, at fan meets, at restaurants; any and everywhere you could possibly think of! You had gotten in couple of good scares, but she was still the reigning queen! Which, she always brags about! "Lisa, you're best friends with Barbie right!?" "Yeah! She's my bestie!" "I hear you like to sneak up and scare eachother! How do you usually do it?!" "Yeah! I get her everytime! Like this...(^.. gif..^).." She's such a fruitloop, but you love her!

Group bestie: NCT Dream

How you meet: it was one of the weirdest encounters you've had in your entire life, to be completely honest. One second you were picking out something to eat at the local 7-11 and then without warning you were surrounded by a pack of fetus looking thugs. "You barbie!?" "We've literally watched every single one of her music videos and all of her interviews. We know what she looks like, why would you ask such a stupid question!?" "I was just trying to act cool!" "Well that's your problem right there! You're a rapper not an actor!" "You want to fight me!?" "Oh look, Canada thinks he can throw down.." "Stop pushing his buttons, Haechan. But on a serious note, we've all seen pictures of her on Lucas' phone sooooo that definitely was a stupid question.." "I swear to go-" "Umm, sorry to interrupt but...what is happening!?" "We're your new best friends, we're here to replace Lucas. Nice to meet you!" "Ummm..I mean..okay, sure.." And just like that, your fate was sealed! (No joke, my brothers football team actually did this to me! Soooo yeah, this legit happened!) You end up not really minding though. They are super supportive, always cheering you on and hyping you up! It's kind of cute, they follow you around like little ducklings; always competing with Lucas for your attention and friendship. "Noona, Yukhei said you prefer atleast one of your bestfriends to be buff so..(^.. gif..^).." You love them!

Ship name: b-min, smiley couple

How you meet: you ran into him at an award show. Literally! You were too busy trying to watch out for Lisa! You knew she was obviously attending the award show, and you knew it was the perfect setting and opportunity for her to sneak up and scare you; so you weren't paying attention to anything! Until you were laying flat on the ground, another human being hovering over you. "Yikes, are you okay!?" "Oh my god! I'm soooo sorry!" You apologize profusely as he tries to help you stand. "It's no problem, I might be short but I'm sturdy- nope, I take that back, you're shorter.." With red cheeks and shaky hands you both stumbled awkwardly through your introductions and from then on, it was history! He ended up asking you out and you jumped at the gun to say yes; you've been together ever since. He really is a great boyfriend, always cuddling you, buying you flowers, taking you out to eat, supporting you. (I'm actually getting kind of jealous lmfao) He's whipped and his band mates tease him about it all the time! "And here we have Park Jimin not paying attention to the camera at all because he's too busy texting Barbie! What a shocker!....(^.. gif..^)..." You're total relationship goals!

Biggest fan: Wooseok (Pentagon) is probably your biggest fan! He's constantly listening to your music, watching your MV's, downloading your songs, watching your TV appearances and talking about you in interviews! "I'm a huge fan of Barbie-noona! She's really talented and she's such a good dancer! I would love to collab with her sometime in the future!" It's the cutest thing; he's such a big fan of everything you do and he's so loyal to your fandom, constantly calling himself a fellow bb! "Wooseok, quick question! Do you think there is anyone in the world that dances better than Barbie?!" "...(^..gif..^)..." It's adorable!

Scandal: it's not a secret that you're a dancing dancer who loves to dance, and it's definitely not a secret that EXO's Kim Jongin is one of the best dancers out there, in your opinion! (It's a total FACT!) So given that he's actually one of your closest friends, even an older brother at times; always willing to practice with you and give you advice! You use this to your benefit! Often! That's why dispatch has photographs of you and Jongin together on multiple nights! "New romance between Solo Artist Barbie and EXO's Kai?!" "Ken and Barbie?! More like Kai and Barbie! New hott couple alert!" You both end up laughing until you're curled up in a ball on the floor. "Really?! A Barbie and Ken joke!? That's what they're leading with?" "You're a bit too vertically challenged to be a Barbie, but honestly I'm killing it in the Ken department.." "Jongin, are you actually trying to fight me right now?!" It's really ridiculous!

Other activities: sure, you're a singer and a rapper but dancing is and always will be your number one! It's your passion, it's what you went to school for and it's what you live to do! So when yg suggests that you start trying to broaden your fan base with some type of variety show or competition like 'Hit the Stage' you freaked out! (Girllllllll, so would I!)You were so excited but also very nervous to showcase more of your dancing skills on such a big platform but it turned out to be one of the funnest experiences! You ended up feeling right at home amongst the other dancers, made some new friends, learned more about dance as a craft and even made some new fans! "It was just sooo fun! I was definitely nervous but I pulled though! I knew I had it in me!" "Ohhhh wow, so you're just not going to give me credit at all!? I mean, its not like I went through another dating scandal just to help you practice or anything, right?! How rude of you, midget." "Oh my god, Jongin, I swear I will push you down a flight of stairs..." It was awesome!

------------------------------------------------------------------------

@kbabie heyyyy sooooo yeahhh, thank you so much for your patience! I know it takes me hella long to do idol ships, because I kind of overdo it. But thank you so much for the request, I hope you like it! Please feel free to let me know what you think! 😅

[zwiezraczek]

Heyyy!!:) so I’ve been reading fics about warren worthington from x-men, and I wanted to ask for 8, 11 &20 with him, smth like really angsty with fluff at the end pleasee :D love youu💕

Love The Way You Lie [Blurb]

Inspired by Love The Way You Lie - Eminem

8. “Why are you doing this to me?” 11. “You're driving me crazy, you know that?” 20. “I think I just found somebody to love.”

Warning: Unhealthy relationship, violence mentioned

~~~

You gulped the bottle, laughing, feeling the alcohol pulsing through your veins as the music grew louder and louder. Mutants clubs, the best clubs. But what was even more beautiful in all of this, was the illegal part: mutants were indeed illegal, their clubs? Illegal. Their existence? Illegal. Their games? Illegal. And this was why you loved to stay there, with your bestfriend, dancing until your feet hurt and your head filled with alcohol and dirty thoughts, until your hands slid under somebody's t-shirt, until you could feel alive, again.

And as the lights flickered above your head, you noticed them. These majestic white wings in the darkness, surrounded by various persons, dancing girls next to them, lazily brushing against them and the man owning them. His beautiful and mesmerizing eyes. He had a drink in his hand, a girl in the other, sitting on his lap, giggling and smiling as she touched the angelic curls on his head. But his eyes were looking at you right now, and the only thing you could think about was him. Only him.

Lust danced between you, as you swayed your way through the crowd to find yourself in front of him, before he could have a better look at you. You were sparkling, seductive, a temptress. And he looked like a fallen angel, with his burning eyes and his white wings. He had toyed enough with the girl on his lap, and asked her to leave, and so she did, not pleased to see you being his new center of attention.

“I think I just found somebody to love,” he declared, after drinking a sip of his beer. His eyes devouring you with one glance from above.

“You sure pretty boy,” you asked, while smirking, “I'm pretty handful to be with. Not sure you could handle me...”

“Let's find out, doll.” With a gesture of his hand, he invited you on his lap, and you couldn't refuse. And as you sat up there, he began to kiss your neck, roughly, lustily, with passion. His skin pressed against yours, as you gasped from time to time. “See? I'm doing great.”

“I'm not so sure,” you moaned as he licked your collarbone, your hand softly toying with his t-shirt. “I've seen bett... Oh my god,” you exhaled as he made you feel alright, just by kissing your neck.

“Maybe better than you thought, doll.” His expert hands wandered all around your body, his wings wrapping around both of you, your moans only for his ears, nobody else.

“You're driving me fucking crazy,” you panted, looking at him with a sparkle in your eyes. He probably was the one.

“So do you, doll.”

~~~

You became what some could call lovers, what others could call sex friends, but whatever you had was a game. The game to know which one of you could drag the other towards the edge, the edge of common sense and the edge of sanity. Aggressiveness rising as you kissed that boy, his body pressed against yours and his hands moving gently on your hips, your rage exploding when a girl's tongue wandered on his collarbone, him holding her close and marking her neck. Always eyes on each other, to see which one would break the first. There was no pattern, but everything always ended in a fight. Either you going out, yelling names at him, waiting in the apartment you shared and breaking glasses while he came back, crying, raging and telling him to fuck off, either him going absolutely batshit, trying almost to kill the guy being with you, pining you up against the wall as you looked at him with your provocative eyes.

“Why are you doing this to me,” he asked, your jaw in his right hand. It hurt, it absolutely hurt how much his fingers were into your skin as he held your face to force you to look at him.“Answer, bitch!”

“Because you agreed, motherfucker,” you would reply, scents of alcohol in your voice as many as in his own. You'd go through the pain, as always, he'd apologize, you'd apologize.

“Don't you fucking toy with me, you're mine,” he would exclaim, the attention suddenly driven towards the two of you, his wings sharpening at their ends, you could hear their hissing. You knew these could make you bleed, and they did and not only once. But you made them bleed too, not once, with some broken glass.

“I'm not a pet of yours, Warren,” you whispered, confident as you felt that breathing became difficult. You smiled nevertheless.

“But you are fucking mine, either you want it or no, and I'll fucking kill whoever tries to fuck around with you. You heard that,” you couldn't tell if he was speaking to you, or to the guys gathered around you as he let you go. Your jaw hurt, it would leave some bruises in the morning. But who cared? You won the game tonight, you won this round and that was all that matter.

“So how about showing me I'm all yours then, Warren Worthington the Third,” your cooed, looking at him. Your makeup was flawed, tears which ran on your face when he chocked you made you look like a small hurt panda, but you were lust on legs to him, with that face or without.

“You're driving me crazy doll, you really do,” he whispered, his hand against the wall, just right to your ear. His wings softened a bit, you touched them, carelessly because you knew how much it helped him to relax, to be turned on.

You were sure of one thing during that night: you won the most outrageous and passionate night, only to yourself. With Warren, a man capable of making you scream for any reason.

~~~

His burning rage met your limits on that night. You spat on his face, as he grabbed your arm telling you that you had to stay there, he punched a hole in the wall next to your head. You felt scared, but also impressed. But you told him that you were leaving, for whatever reason, and as you slammed the door you heard him screaming, hitting the door endlessly. But letting you go. You stood there, in the hallway, hearing him burn. You heardshattering of glass, how many glasses you broke together while in this sick relationship? You had your head between your fingers, crying. You felt helpless. You loved him, he loved you, this sick game of yours was the best thing that could have happened to you both. But that was consuming you, destroying sometimes. But you loved it the way it was.

As you sat in the dark corridor, after a dozen of minutes, you heard the door open. You saw light, and him. His wings struggling to pass through the door as always, looking like an angel in the moonlight, only shorts on and his torso on display. He offered you his hand, eyes tired and puffy from crying too. You knew everything was hurting you, you knew he was hurt, you knew you were hurting you, but this weird exchange of energy suited youboth. You took his hand, and entered the apartment, watching out to not step on some glass.

“Doll it wasn't you, it was me,” he assured, stroking your hair as you laid your head on his lap, slowly not sobbing anymore. “And maybe our relationship isn't as crazy at it seems...”

“It's fucking us,” you corrected him, rising your eyes on him. “We're driving each other crazy for nothing, watching ourselves burn as we push each other's buttons...”

“This is what happens when a tornado meets a volcano, doll,” he delicately whispered, looking at you. “I can barely breathe when I'm not with you, doll. I can't fucking get you out my mind, you know that doll?” You nodded, feeling exactly the same. “So don't move doll, and close your eyes.”

You rose, looking at him in confusion. This wasn't Warren at all, it wasn't how he worked. He urged you to close your eyes before leaving you, alone, on the couch, hands covering your eyes. You heard him walking carefully to not make his feet bleed on the glass he broke earlier, before he opened a drawer and closed it. Curiosity shook your whole body as you heard him being close, the sound of his wings right next to you, their soft touch brushing your bare shoulders.

“Open your eyes doll.”

And he knelt in front of you, looking at your tired and puffy face from crying. A small box, with a ring in his hands.

“All I know is that I love you too much to leave you walk away from me, doll. All I know is that rage takes us over sometimes, controls us, but I also know that we love each other.”

“Yes,” you replied before he could ask you anything. “Warren yes.”

“Let me finish,” he said, looking at you with these glistening eyes. “I love you, y/n, and I want to marry you; with or without these little game of ours I don't fucking care, I just wantto be with you, doll.”

“Yes Warren, I agree, I love you too,” you kissed his forehead gently, your hand caressing his wings first, and then his cheek. “I'd be honored to become Mrs. Worthington.”