#i just want to see them crying on each other is that too much to ask

[7ndipity]

BTS As Girl Dads

Ot7 x Reader

Summary: Headcanons about how the members would each handle being girl dads

Warnings: none

A/N: Thanks to @coffeedepressionsoup for this request! This got me soo in my feels, they’d all be such great dads(I may have gone a lil self indulgent but who cares lol). Obviously, some/most of these could also apply to any kid, regardless of gender, but for the sake of the Hc, we’re focusing on daughters

Masterlist

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Jin:

He’s honestly such a girl dad, argue with the wall

I totally see him wholly embracing the title and all the things that are typically considered ‘girly’, like pink and sparkles and all that

He would indulge every single one of her interests. She likes animals? They’re going to the zoo every weekend. She likes music? He’s signing her up for lessons for whatever instrument she’s into

I have this mental picture of them sitting on her bed together while he’s reading her bedtime stories, using all these silly voices and wearing one of her princess hats or something bc she insisted he needed for the character and just-😭

Yoongi:

Yoongi would be the softest girl dad ever, like she had him wrapped around her finger from day one. He took one look at her tiny little scrunched up face, that reminded him waay too much of his own expression when he’s annoyed, and he was a goner

I see him just sitting soo patiently while she gives him makeovers, wearing like three different pairs of clip-on earrings at the same time

He would really focus on teaching her to stand up for herself and makes sure she never takes any shit from anyone

He might come off a little stern sometimes, but it’s just because he worries and wants the best for her

Hobi:

Okay, Hobi as a girl dad might be one of my favorite headcanons, bc he’d be soo fucking sweet with them!

The tea party King. Like he shows up dressed in the most ridiculous outfits to make her giggle, and ready to talk imaginary gossip with her and any plushies that are joining them🤭

He would love shopping with/for her, constantly trying to find the coolest outfits or pieces for her, and they would definitely wear matching outfits when she was little(she would be the best dressed toddler ever, lol)

I also see him being quite protective of her at times, being super nervous/worried about her doing things like riding a bike for the first time or on her first days of school

Namjoon:

Omg Namjoon as a girl dad would be soo fucking protective. Like if someone does anything to hurt or upset her, they’re fucked

I see him loving daddy-daughter days out together, taking her to the park or museums or bookstores, really just wanting to indulge her curiosity and interests

Like Yoongi, he would really work to make sure she knows how to stand up for herself, as well as others

For all of his sternness tho, he would have the biggest soft spot for her, he’s 100% the type to let her have dessert before dinner or something bc she gave him puppy eyes

Jimin:

Omg he’s soo girl dad coded, like it’s not even funny(he literally confirmed that on that ep of “are you sure?” like 🥺)

He would treat her like a little princess, doting on her at every possible opportunity, buying her toys/clothes/treats, taking her on special outings, etc. If she wants something, he will do whatever he can do give it to her

He would not be able to stand seeing her in any sort of pain. Like even her just having a scraped knee would make him slightly misty-eyed, even tho she’s not upset/crying about it

I see them having lots of long talks about whatever’s on her mind. He would really strive to be her safe place to ask questions about anything, from school and friends to life and the future

Taehyung:

I see him being an amazing girl dad! He has this amazing, comforting dynamic with the girls that he’s worked with/is friends with, so I can only imagine how supportive he would be with his own daughter

He would be so indulgent in whatever she wanted. Ice cream before bed? Heck yeah, let him grab a spoon too. She wants a new plushie/toy even tho she just got one like yesterday? Well, the new one needs a friend, soo-

But he would still have his more stern/protective moments with her, just moreso in little ways like making sure she’s always wearing her helmet and elbow/knee pads, brushes her teeth, does her homework, etc

He would play along with all/any of their imaginary games, fully committing to the role(and adding waay too many silly death/fainting scenes bc they make her laugh)

Jungkook:

Junkook would absolutely adore a daughter. Like she would be his little princess and anyone/anything that upsets her will have to answer to him.

On the flip side of that protectiveness tho, he is so unbelievably gentle with her. As an infant, he handled her like she was made of glass, and as she grows up, he would always speak to her in a softer tone than he uses for anyone else 

(Also dodon’t think about him singing her to sleep every night as an infant. Getting up with her in the middle of the night and walking her around the house, singing to her softly till she drifts back off to sleep in his arms)

He would love teaching her things and playing games with her(I totally picture him teaching her boxing in tiny and falling over all dramatic when she lands a hit, lol)

Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @classicalelephant @dfqcsqueen @mother2monsters @comingupwithacoolnameishard @universal-travel-er @bo0ghol @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz

[running-with-kn1ves]

Satin Pillows To Cry On

CW: coercion with money, age gap(7 yrs), transactional marriage, obsessive/yandere behavior

gn! reader

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You’ve got nothing else, no one else to rely on. 

‘You’re something he bought to keep from growing old.” 

Your clothes are worth small countries. Your cars stacked in 3-level garages. Diamonds, emeralds, pearls hanging from your wrists and ears, satchels made of endangered animal skins, different shoes for each day of the year. 

Your boyfriend of three years spat at your feet when you told him what you were doing. 

“His money can’t love you, not like I can.”

The wedding was only two months away when you broke up with him, told him you couldn’t live in his broke-down apartment anymore, that you couldn’t live with debt trailing wherever you went. You went so far as to make him hate you, to tell him that you never wanted to see him again, that you never loved him, that he better not bother showing up to the wedding. You didn’t want him there, you never wanted to see him again. 

“You’re lying to me; he’s making you say these things, he’s using you against me! You’ve known him what-- two seconds, and you’re going to marry this man?! He’s nearly a decade older than you!” 

Seven years of an age gap or not, he was still a thousand times more independent, wealthy, and a safer choice than your boyfriend. You weren’t some fresh college student new to the world, you had graduated over two years ago, still finding no luck in getting a stable income-- forget about whether or not it was in the field of your degree. 

You left in a single day, fitting all of your scavanged belongings into one of your fiance’s awaiting cars. You left anything worth of value with your ex-boyfriend, knowing he’d find more use out of it than you would. You would even leave the rest of your things there if he could find use for them, but you knew they’d just be one more painful reminder of your betrayal. 

He did as you said, not showing up to your wedding, staying clear, never appearing in your line of sight since the day you left. It made it easier…. For both of you that way. 

And now you were happy-- well, maybe not happy, maybe not even content, but you were… safe. You had everything you needed: a working car, a stable job that you felt productive in, a clean and comforting house to come home to, a spouse. Sure, maybe you didn’t get your new job yourself, or your house or your car-- but did that really matter, in this economy? Who wouldn’t trade their life and their independence for this kind of wealth?

And your husband… he wasn’t all bad. He might have only wanted you for the sake of having you at first, like a new jewel or the latest technological invention. But he was doting and caring in his own way. Maybe just a tiny bit too invested in you, in your schedule and who you talked to. A little too hateful towards your ex-boyfriend, the one who had you before he could. But everyone had character flaws, and on good days you could distract him from his grumpy mood and stress and obsessive behaviors by being the loving and oh so perfect spouse you had trained yourself to be ever since he asked to marry you. 

“Colder than all that gold…” You repeated in your mind, the words your family whispered to each other at your wedding reception only a few feet away from you. 

That was over six months now, though… the honeymoon phase never existed, you rarely saw your husband except for his midnight appearances back from the office, and whenever he would whisk you away for a weekend vacation to savor the time he had with you. For someone more sophisticated, much wealthier, and dare you say handsomer than the average man-- you were surprised to find he didn’t have a line of divorces behind him. 

No; he said, he had been “waiting for you.” whether  you or he knew it, he understood right from the moment of meeting you that you were the one he’d have for the rest of his life, even if it killed him. That severity… scared you. But in a sick sense, it made you feel relieved. Forever? This could be yours, forever? Your family would never have to struggle again, you would never have to worry where your next meal came from?

“I cleared your schedule until tuesday; we’re going to the isles. A mini vacation, you might call it. Get your things.”

He was cold, that was for sure. But, was he any worse than your ex-boyfriend, especially when he was offering you an expensive experience on top of that?

“All right..” You acquiesced. 

And now, you lied sunken into the bed feeling his loving, hot breath on your navel. Going so sweetly slow, so oddly and uncharacteristingly lingering with his touches as he gazes into your eyes. You didn’t like this; didn’t like that when he was cherishing you, making love to you, holding you so intimately, he was appearing… like a husband should. Where did he get the nerve to ignore you everyday, to have hardly any time for you, only to come back and beg for your love when it was convenient for him? 

But you keep your mouth shut, like you should, if you want to keep eating breakfast in bed, keep wearing silk robes while watching the view of the ocean outside your window.

“So beautiful…you’re like a work of art, the kind no amount of money can buy.” 

That was funny, hilarious even. Enough so to make you cry. 

A familiar face passes by the slightly ajar door to distract you, likely one of the housekeepers leaving for the night. But you swear the man’s figure reminds you of someone from your past, someone you loved and left for good. 

Your husband brings back your attention by placing a gentle kiss to your temple, blindly undoing the clasp of the necklace he bought you.

“I’m so lucky… so lucky to have been the one to catch you, forever. No one could’ve done it, not without what I have.”

He wanted you to kiss and caress back, but sometimes lying still was just enough. It was enough for him to witness you, basking in the glow of everything you wore from him, lying in the Egyptian cotton sheets he paid extra for, your body molded to the diet his personal chefs cooked. 

Even as he pushed a knee between your legs, traveling from your navel to your stomach with open-mouthed sucks and kisses in the rawest form of affection, you couldn’t help but turn your face deep into the pillow. So soft, the soft purple shielding your eyes from his tender gaze.

You might’ve given up love, given up everything familiar and those who you’ve cared for-- but at least you had satin pillows to cry on, and the finest jewelry to wipe your tears with. 

[jinnie-ret]

cover me

poly!stray kids x fem reader

genre: angst, fluff at the end

content warnings: stress from uni/work

word count: 1.5k

summary: money, work, school. it was only a matter of time before the boys would see her crumble, and be there to pick up the pieces

requested: @straykidsnerd255

1K FOLLOWERS PLAYLIST 💚🖤

MAIN MASTERLIST

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Every time she tried to take one step forward, something would ultimately knock her back twice as far. Finally having a very generously paid job as an intern at a big company was serving her well, yet with the return of going back to university, finding a work-school balance was becoming difficult.

Truly, that was the hardest thing. She had great people around her, those being her uni friends or her loving boyfriends, the renowned Kpop band, Stray Kids. The way they cared for her and each other with such strong morals and support meant that surely it would be easy to confide in them.

Not always, especially in this case.

Other times she would be thankful for the fact that her partners all had a longer practice at the company, not to their own detriment of course, but because it gave her more time to get herself together and paint on a calm picture of 'I'm definitely not struggling right now and on the brink of my second breakdown of the day'.

However, this time she really needed them. The stress had amounted to such a level that she felt it right through to her bones, and so she found herself crying over the smallest things, which in turn let out the release of her biggest pain.

"Stupid shoes, why aren't they organised, there's too many," she sniffled, sat on her knees by the front door as she began to cry at shoes. Yes, shoes. Her boyfriends' shoes to be specific. She would have thought at least Seungmin would have berated the others for their lack of organisation at this point but even his were out of place.

"They didn't even match them back up," she cried, and more tears spilled out, "oh, why am I even crying right now?"

Sometimes being in such a state meant that it was hard to understand your own feelings, your thoughts far too occupied with the wants of other people to be able to manage the basic needs of your own.

Eventually she gave up on the shoes and wiped her tears, walking slowly over to the sofa and letting her body fall into it with a soft thump. She tugged a soft velvety blanket over herself, one that Felix probably picked out due to it's plush exterior, and instinctively cocooned herself. Her heart felt heavy, her eyes hot and burning as the tears kept falling. All it took was a reminder on her phone for a work assignment, and a uni assignment, to trigger a sob to catch her throat.

"Too much," she sobbed to herself, trying to muffle the sounds even though there was no one else to hear them, "it's too much."

She was wrong. Not about her feelings, gosh, no, but the fact that she thought she was alone.

"Hey, hey, what's going on?" Hyunjin was crouched down right in front of her trembling form, almost hidden if it wasn't for the blanketed lump that had been shaking so much it couldn't have been natural.

His hand brushed her hair back and his thumb rubbed under her eyes, catching the tears that seemed to keep appearing. Hyunjin watched on in deep concern, just like their other boyfriends did the more they realised something was wrong.

"What? When, when did you get back?" she gulped down her sobs, or attempted to, even though her words still came out messily. She sat up, the blanket falling off her shoulders and resting around her hips.

"Don't worry about that, love. Just tell us what's going on, yeah? What's wrong?" Chan held her against him immediately, taking a seat ñext to her. The only time his arm that was wrapped around her moved away, was to let Jeongin lift the blanket back up to keep her warm.

"I don't know," she sniffed indignantly, coughing lightly through her cries when she tried to clear her throat. Her arm pressed against the lower half of her face.

"You're getting yourself in a state now, come on, move your arm, you know you don't have to hold back in front of us," Seungmin sighed sadly, seeing his girlfriend so stressed. He pulled her arm towards her lap which he was sat in front of, holding her hand with one of his own and the other rubbing her knee.

"Thanks," she said sarcastically at first, until hearing the rest of what he had to say and tilting her head up to the ceiling to blink away the rest of her tears.

Chan pressed a kiss against her forehead, and everyone was around her to offer comfort, Felix and Changbin in particular wanting to jump out of their seats on the adjacent sofa to take all the pain away.

"What's got you to upset, jagi?" Jisung pouted, his own eyes glistening as he saw how upset you were.

"It's stupid, really," she began, rubbing at her eyes roughly, Hyunjin subsequently tutting at her and pulling her other hand away that Seungmin wasn't occupying.

"We're not doing that, jagi," Minho shook his head, brows furrowed, looking down at the floor with his hands folded together, "if it's upset you, it's not stupid."

"Exactly, please just tell us, you know we just want to help, that's all," Felix quickly pitched in, face crumpled sadly much like your own.

"There's just too much going on really. You know? Like, oh-" she had to cut herself off when her voice cracked with emotion again.

"You're ok, take your time," Jeongin gave a small smile and nod to reassure her.

"We're listening, baby," Changbin's raspy voice rung out.

"I've got a good job right? Like, it pays so well, but now with going back to uni it's just like I don't have time for anything. I-i'm having to squeeze in hours where I don't have them because my boss won't help me work around my timetable," she explained, the clashing of two parts of her life and time issues being what was clearly causing so much turmoil.

"I'm sorry, darling," Chan tugged her closer to him, a frown on his face.

"Don't be sorry, not your fault, is it? I'm just so tired, I'm exhausted," she admitted, pressing her lips together and taking a deep breath in order to not cry again.

"We'll help you figure this out, ok?" Hyunjin leant his head against her shoulder.

"Ok, ok," she let out a deep breath and nodded.

"I think you need to focus on uni, love. If work can't meet you in the middle then, it's hard," Seungmin trailed off, not wanting to fully leave her in the dark but not wanting to be too blunt.

"What do you think, jagi?" Jisung wondered, curled up against Minho, one leg hanging over the older's lap.

"I don't know. I don't even wanna make any decisions right now," she shook her head tiredly, blinking a couple times.

"That's understandable, baby, how about we just relax for now, ok?" Changbin suggested.

"And if anything else is upsetting you, please tell us," Chan huffed with a knowing smile.

"Ok, promise," she grinned.

₊˚⊹♡

She must have fallen asleep without realising, as she found herself waking up to Jeongin and Felix giggling over something on the latter's phone.

"What's going on?" she murmured tiredly, pressing her face deeper into... Jisung's chest, it took one whiff of his cologne to be able to tell it was him.

"Had a good sleep then, hmm?" Minho poked her forehead, slow blinking at her.

"Mm, yeah," she nodded, "Lixie, Innie, what's funny?"

The two froze, looking at her a bit guiltily.

"Well, umm, you know we have that camera in the hallway, just in case for security, like if someone broke in or-" Jeongin began to ramble awkwardly,

"I know, yeah," she nods, adjusting her head against Jisung's chest as he loosely keeps an arm around her, securing her to him.

"We're actually sorry for laughing, babe, it's just... You were crying over our shoes earlier?" Felix can't even keep eye contact as he explains.

Jisung stifles a laugh and so she slaps his chest playfully through her mild embarrassment, making him yell out dramatically.

"What's Sungie done now?" Hyunjin asks as he flops onto the sofa, entering the room again after leaving Chan, Seungmin and Changbin to managing the cooking.

"It's more about what our jagi did," Minho teases, looking at her with a smug grin.

"Guys, I was stressed, leave me aloneeee," she huffed, but it didn't stop the light laughter that filled the room knowing that she wasn't completely upset about it.

"Sorry, but..." Jeongin chuckles again, "the way you throw the shoes away from you is so funny!"

"What did our shoes do to you?!" Felix laughed again as he watched the video on replay.

"They smelt bad," she grinned happily, teasing them back as revenge, "specifically Ji's."

"Yah!"

Jisung gave her a noogie, keeping her trapped in his arms. He couldn't let her discredit him like that.

"Sorry! Sorry! Hahaha!"

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listeners: @skz-streamer @kiraisastay @kpopmenace143 @haodore @arloo00 @dunno-wut-to-do @splat00z @his-angell @2minstan @skzoologist @lovingchan @atinyniki @writingforstraykids @minholing @lilmisssona @astraysimp @lixie-phoria @theo4eve @linoalwaysknows @royal-shinigami @jolly04 @turtledove824 @yangbbokari @thisrandomgoofy15 @lieslab @hannamoon143 @arumlilyeclipse

[zwoftt]

weekly dorym moments!!! (and just moments in general i just really like))

dorian and orym being in a line in initiative!!! comboing the FUCK out of the emissary

liam/orym saying “some dorian action” when it was dorian first in initiative

the silly impressed face liam/orym makes when dorian chokeholds the emissary successfully ehehe

when dorian suggests that he could take someone on his steed too, orym looks worried about the thought of splitting up.

AGAIN, dorian looking to orym for guidance when he gets overwhelmed in the moment in figuring out what to do with the guards,,,

liam/orym laughing at dorian’s part in the play…. dorian getting nervous!!!

fearne taming glomeglutt (idk how to spell it help me… anyway i heart fearne she is so girlboss for that

them just exchanging glances and smiles at each other, always trying to see what the other’s reaction is to the situation,,,

okay but dorian looking over to see that orym was staying to watch the loom— so he also stays but covers his eyes is actually so cute.

poor dorian wanting to know what the loom was probably because he is still thinking of ways to bring cyrus back :(((( liam/orym for sure clocking that. ughhhh

imogen comforting dorian!!! ashton comforting fearne!!! laudna comforting orym!!! so much softness awhwhwh

and then dorian once again looking over at orym and asking “could you say that again but slower?” looking for direction… looking for instruction….

stop the fucking lovesick gaze liam gives orym when dorian puts the guard onto his dragon horse and sends him off,,

orym agreeing with dorian that he trusts ‘us’.

the badass “there is real evil in the world. i’ve seen it.” from dorian to fearne. “some things don’t deserve second chances.” and orym’s sympathetic face towards dorian,,,

DESPITE THEIR DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES ORYM FUCKING LEANS ON DORIAN’S HIP. IM GOING TO CRY. IM GOING TO CRY. DORIAN PUTTING HIS ARM AROUND HIM, NOT FLINCHING AT THE SUDDEN TOUCH?!?!!!!? RUBBING HIS HAIR AND HUMMING A TUNE???!!!

braius getting nana mori’s bussy good god. help. also him mentioning “dorian and orym happy together…” and the smiling faces of both robbie and liam!!

[hannahssimblr]

Jen sleeps on my bedroom floor that night. Others crash in the living room, and Evie retreats to the guest room, as per my mother’s instructions. We don’t get the chance to say goodnight. 

Now, mom and I whisper at each other on the landing.

“Can I say goodbye to Ivy?”

“No, she’s fast asleep. You’ll only disturb her.”

“Okay, but I won’t see her. I think she’d like to see me, too.”

She purses her lips. “She’s too small, and she’s starting school again soon. You’ll throw her whole routine off, and you’ll have her upset with all this talk of leaving. I’ll pass on your goodbyes in the morning.”

But when she goes to bed, I sneak in regardless, peeking around Ivy’s door into her room, lit with the dim glow of her nightlight. There, I stand for a few moments as she sleeps soundly, her arms thrown over her pillow and her blonde hair around her head like a halo. She’s always slept like that, like a little maniac, arms and legs akimbo, determined to take up as much space as possible. Her chest rises and falls in the slow, steady rhythm of her breath. 

I step away and quietly shut the door. 

Back in my room, Jen is sleeping too. I’m careful to undress myself quietly, and climb under the covers. 

Setting my alarm is the last thing I do. 

Four. 

I awake to the vibration of my phone and the frantic song of the first birds of dawn. It is still dark, but that other-worldly, early morning haze that you only catch before the first burst of sunrise. 

Goosebumps erupt on my skin as I climb out of bed. I dress myself and fix my hair. 

Evie is still sleeping. 

In the bathroom, I clean my teeth, then leave the toothpaste out on the counter for her. She won’t know that we keep it in the cabinet, because anything that doesn’t suit the colour scheme of the bathroom is deemed offensive to the eyes. She will appreciate knowing where to find it when she gets up.

Afterwards, I risk a gentle knock on her door, to no response. After waiting a few moments for sounds of life, I receive nothing.

A slice of dim sunlight streams through the bathroom door and across the floorboards. 

I knock again. 

“Evie?”

Nothing. 

She must be sleeping in. We were all awake past midnight, at least, so she’ll be tired, but I’m certain she’ll get up soon. 

To my left, a door squeaks.

My sister, in her pyjamas, rubs sleep from her eyes. “Hello.”

“Why are you awake?”

“Because I heard you.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” I climb to my knees in front of her. “I was trying to wake someone else. She must be a heavier sleeper than you, yeah?”

“Are you going now?”

“In about an hour.”

“Oh.” She doesn’t know how to feel about this yet. It’s too early to make decisions. Her hair is sticking up in all directions, and her eyes are weighty with sleep. 

I smile. “You should go back to bed.”

“Were you going to say goodbye to me?”

I hesitate. “Of course I was.”

“Oh, okay.”

“C’mere.” I hold my arms out for a hug, and she falls into them, all warm from her bed, her cheek soft and hot on the side of my neck. 

“I’ll see you soon, alright?”

“Will you ring me?”

“Every day, if that’s what you want.”

“Oh, no. I won’t want that. You’re too annoying to talk to every day.”

“Alright, jeez. Once a week?”

She considers this. “Yeah, alright.”

“Glad we could come up with a deal.”

She squeezes me tighter. “Okay. Bye, Judie.”

“Bye, Ivy.” I squeeze her back and rock her side to side until she begs to be freed. I oblige and flick her lightly on the forehead. “Get back to bed, right?”

She nods, becoming still and quiet, and I start to worry she might cry. I can’t handle any more crying. 

“C’mon, don’t be silly. Go to bed. I’ll call you in a few hours.”

“Yeah.”

“Go on,” I push her back into her room, and watch her climb back under the covers, curled up on her side with just her face poking out, red nose and wet eyes. 

“Miss you,” she says. 

“Miss you too.”

Beginning // Prev // Next

[ghostykapi]

three against me (the trio's love)

misamo & fem!reader // college au

thank you for @cry4mina for the misamo pictures and for being delulu with me about misamo <3 MISAMOOO

when you said you wanted your college life to be eventful

you didn't expect the universe throwing you three girlfriends, each with their own side of how they got you locked with them

it starts during the first semester of your 3rd year, when you were in a small cafe, getting to a headstart in your pile of homework

it's perfect, a iced coffee by your side, three readings beside you, your laptop on the coffee table in front of you and phone silenced, muting whatever the onslaught of messages nayeon is sending that you can't even be bothered to check

you needed this, you couldn't handled anymore 'dubchaeng babysitting!' when the duo would just make your head hurt with the amount of crazy ideas they had. the change of pace for the day is much welcome, especially knowing that jeongyeon took over with the lure of seeing a band a cafe next university over

it's nice, you can feel like you are in control for even just for a bit

then the cafe's noise dies down when the door chimes

it's too silent

fuck.

you brace yourself at the trio, who’s presence can make the entire student populous go on their knees. the mere whisper of their little group brings the entire college either trembling

misamo.

you can feel her gaze land on you, despite the only indication that it is one of them without looking is the whispers within the cafe. even the baristas know them

hirai momo. softball player, the star athlete that brings medals and more recognition to your university. average grades, stellar performance when she steps on the field and can land a nasty punch

with each step you hear her take, the more you have to remind yourself not to look. you can hear her giggles and the way your heartbeat is now in your ears

minatozaki sana. influencer and model, the unspoken leader of their group. through her bubbly and charming personality, she uses her wit to become the face of the university. part of the top 10% of the whole university, the inspiration to study hard and diligently

you feel a hand on your shoulder, the firm grasp rendering you unable to move, yet it's how you know who it is. she hums in delight at your sharp intake of breath, knowing that you don't need anything else to tell her apart

myoui mina. rising entrepreneur of 3 different business ventures, the deadliest one from the trio. always calculating, always 10 steps ahead of her peers and competitors. sweet, kind, and demur, she brings class to whatever she does

that includes sitting beside you, her bag gently landing on the table, your proximity leaves the others questioning your relationship, but all you know is that you must have done something at your shared class with her yesterday for her too approach you

"i hope you don't mind" she starts, eyes confident and you want to scream and cry because she's wearing a suit. typically worn when she's fresh from visiting one of her businesses. "i heard you were well versed in code"

"programming is my major yes" you keep your voice leveled, after all, being a woman in such a male dominated course has made you what your flock of admirers say, freezingly cold.

"i have a proposition for you" mina starts, keeping a dangerous game of who can keep the eye contact going "you help me with homeworks and projects while i give you money per assessment made"

while mina has a fair share of students that matched her energy, something in your gaze makes her crack a bit

"what makes you think i'll say yes?"

"you can't say no to me"

"yes i can. here watch i'll say it"

and mina can't deny it when she feels her heart start to race when you get closer to her. faces barely a few inches apart

"i don't do things for money. so no"

and you pull back, ready to put back to attention to your homework when mina speaks up

"every time you have to help me i'll pay you in food"

oh goodness free food

"ok i'm in" you hum, hands typing away on your laptop "we start in two days, send me an address and i'll met you there myoui. now shoo, i have to catch up to my work"

she stares at you with a blank gaze, but inside she's dumbfounded at your boldness

nevertheless, she stands up to leave you be, but before she's out of earshot, she says something you don't quite catch

"what?" you ask

"you should call me mina. myoui is too professional even for my taste dear"

three days later, it's momo who bugs you after your morning class

she slips up right beside you, the lack of dress code in the university gives momo a chance to wear a body hugging pink dress, something that makes everyone go crazy. what you don't like is how every guy is looking at her in ways you want to pluck their eyes out

filthy bastards don't deserve to gaze at her at all

"momo" your ears are red because everyone can clearly see you both in the halls, her arm around your waist as you slowly walk to the next building for your next class "what are you doing?"

"accompanying you to class" momo won't admit it, but ever since mina said you were, in her words, 'pretty and sufficient', she had to see you

"why?" you ask, glaring at every man who's looking at her too creepily, making them scurry away

"just because, plus our classrooms are right beside each other" she relaxes more with each less man in the hall, you notice it

"fine" you huff, and before she can even say anything else, you remove your jacket, giving it to her "wear this for today, i don't want any man to look at you. you're too gorgeous for them"

the rest of the walk is silent on the way to both of your classrooms. only thing you can hear is the squeak of every sneaker from each man running way and the whispers in between students

it's the most peaceful walk momo has had since becoming star athlete

so when you wave at her from the door before disappearing to go to the classroom beside her's, she feels like she can breath without panicking

she hates taking anything math related, but she might bare it more when she knows your beside her classroom

she's hooked

later that afternoon, while you lounge around the student council office sipping a red bull, someone barges in, scaring your team who's having a heated debate on who should the rest of the papers

"fucking jesus who the fuck-" ryujin is silenced from who she sees at the door

minatozaki sana, the ever persistent and one of the most notable member under the team of the president.

"someone sent you flowers?"

not a question you were expecting, even your team is gawking at her

dressed to perfection, you can't catch her in a regular outfit at any point, which is kind of ridiculous. sana doesn't care, always styled like she's going to a fashion week in europe. today she's wearing that white dress that she just wore in her feature in some magazine

what is it with the trio and wearing designer clothing every time they are at university grounds? specifically when they are within your eyesight

"pardon?" you know the amount of admires that still try despite cold rejection, even hailing from different courses. hell you think someone from the university over sent you chocolates once, you gave it to your team though

"did you accept some stupid boy's flowers?" sana repeats, anger in her eyes, an emotion she barely shows, and possessiveness in her body language, something you see glimpses of when someone gets close to mina and momo that she doesn't approve of

"minatozaki you know i don't do that" you say calmly, your team in awe at how you keep a calm attitude "if the suitor doesn't have the guts to face me, then they do not deserve my limited time"

"then you'll entertain if i do right?"

you can hear felix and lily choke over their pizza behind you

"you are not serious" you look at her like she's crazy (she loves being called that, you learn from mina later on)

she gets closer to you, faces barely an inch apart, any slip up from her leaning way to closer over your table and she can just kiss you

"try me, i'll see you at tomorrow's meeting miss vice-president"

when she leaves the office, it takes you and your team a total of 5 minutes to recover

"jesus what the fuck was that"

"ryujin shut up, go back to bickering with lia"

no one has ever said no to the trio

maybe a few people had

they're just not as pretty, charming and confident as you

maybe that's why mina keeps sitting beside you during your shared programming class even oustide 'tutor' hours, why momo's insistent at being beside you in between periods to carry your items on days your classes line up, and why sana shows up in every weekly meeting with an expensive gift or a trinket, challenging each suitor head on.

women like them are gonna be the death of you

"you have some crazy women that like you" jihyo jests beside you, giggling at how sana is glaring daggers at how close you both are. you both are now taking a break along with the rest of the internal team to finalize some papers

"yeah well" you don't like to admit it, but ever since their persistence to always either be near you, you have been starting to crack bit by bit "can't really escape them y'know"

"i think you would look cute with them" jihyo hums, swinging her pen between her fingers, making someone across the table keep her stare at the president "misamo and their girlfriend who sucks ass at karaoke"

"ok that was one time" you huff, jihyo's snickering makes sana look up from her phone, jaw tensing up at how close jihyo is "clearly i let you win because you liked it when tzuyu said she's treat you out if you win right?"

that shuts her up. the said tall woman is at the other side of the room, watching the president's face get red, wondering what you just said to make her like this

"get back to work" jihyo then shoos you away, your laughter making jihyo flip you off before returning to work for herself

before you cam even return to work, your eyes meet sana's, her expression unreadable. you wonder what she's thinking of

you look away, a light blush on your cheeks from her intense stare, busying yourself once more with the papers

to sana, witnessing your smile and laughter rewires her brain, heart pleading with her to speed up whatever this stage the three of them are in. each day that passes drives the three of them crazy

mina is messing up in her calculations, momo is missing her shots and sana is losing her composure on the daily

she needs you. they need you.

when sana heads home that night she keeps thinking about you. even when she lets her girlfriends debate what their late night dinner should be (mina wants tacos, momo is craving for some pasta). she blurts out in the middle of it

"do you think y/n would say yes if we offered her sushi as a late night dinner?"

the two stop at their bickering to look at sana, who's eyes are begging for the next move. she's getting itchy and desperate to make it

"satang" mina reaches out to her, letting sana wrap her arms around her waist as momo hugs them both "did something happen?"

"it's just" sana doesn't even try to hide it at this point, knowing that the three of them are nearing their breaking point "i saw her laugh today and it really made me think that 'i want to make her laugh with us' and i-i don't know but it has been driving me mad"

mina hums in understanding and momo speaks up, ready to take that push

"then let's go"

staying late even after meetings is normal for you to catch up with the papers, but for the past few days, you have been staying late in the office to busy your thoughts

mina hasn't been looking at you in the eye or been acknowledging you

momo hasn't been accompanying you to class

sana hasn't shown up to a single meeting this past two weeks

trying to silence your head, you decided to throw yourself into your extra curriculars every night. this night, you are working alone, the only sounds that you can hear are your aggressive typing on your poor keyboard, the music coming from your small speaker and the voices in your head making your heart ache

and now a knock and the door swinging open

"if you have any concerns please drop them by our social media accounts, email, or even the drop box by the-"

you stop your next words when you look up

mina.

you want to curse at the woman, for deliberately avoiding you. it was worse with her, because at least with the two you didn't have the urge to scream because they simply did not show up.

momo.

even clad in that handsome suit, she's still wearing that jacket you handed over to her. devastatingly handsome and gorgeous, you wonder why did she have to leave you wondering in the noisy university halls

sana.

meetings are still the same, but jihyo keeps on asking why your eyes have been straying, always going back to the door. waiting for that laugh to annoy you, waiting for a snarky remark to any stupid men flirting with you, waiting for anything from her

you really want to throw a chair at them for just showing up now and pissing you off

you don't though, because you missed them

each in their own suit, each with their own gift, each one with a nervous smile that no one will ever see, each one wearing their hearts up their sleeves, and each with the same question you didn't know you wanted to hear until now

"we like you. would you like to go out with us? dinner tomorrow night, our treat"

you can't say no

"you guys are horrible at courting. pick me up at 7"

bonus:

in every first date you've been on, you never come over to your dates home. that changes and ends with them

"hirai" you're trying to keep your breath stable as her hands are playing your hair. eyes hazy, but clearly on you, her self control out the door, just like yours

"myoui" she's behind you, her hands on your waist, murmuring what she's been thinking about for the past days. it's all you, and it makes you melt

"minatozaki" you let her kiss you, silencing your worries and doubts, silencing anything that makes you question them. the heart finally getting what it wants

"you my love, deserve to be ours"

[accio-victuuri]

THE MOON REPRESENTS MY HEART 🌙 + Friday Madness

i just think that me freaking about gg singing this song and leaving after that is not right. this song deserves it’s own post and the importance of the Moon’s symbolism between them should be repeated. personally, i was surprised cause i cpn’d about a possible interpretation of showing off moon photos when they do it, then i thought of this song. now you have gege performing it. the universe has clowned me once again. and you have him as performer #8. Bo. are you kidding me? yes, this is a CCP signed-off event. the song must have been an approved piece to perform live but that doesn’t mean GG did not have a say in picking this track. as for him being the 8th one, a coincidence. destiny can’t help but relate them to each other. lol.

you can say that it’s perfect for the theme of mid-autumn festival and it’s a well loved song — yes, that’s right. but we’re all cpfs here who have a long history with 🌖 and GG finally singing it now seems like a “sign”.

this song’s relevance started with a fake rumor:

I would like to add that the moon should be the one that Wang laoshi watched a video of. After watching it, he said, "Do you believe me, I can also dance this for you?" The background music was "The Moon Represents My Heart" I think it should be posted by Xiao laoshi, but this happened a long time ago on the stage, but it should be related. I don’t know about choreography. I was busy with other things at that time. This is what I know.

THIS HITS DIFFERENT NOW. imagine yibo dancing to this. i will lose it. 🤯🤯🤯

and it doesn’t help that xz had a teaser video released by BRTV today:

send the moon to you // "I want to take a picture of the moon for you but it never comes out”

this is why we love fake rumors, one way or another, the similarities come up or parts of it come true.

then the matching photoshoot prop. also their studios posting 5 minutes apart. yes it makes sense for them to post in the same time span cause the content released around the same time too. but xzs is 20:40. 8:40. 8= Bo and 40 on the clock points to 8.

Seriously, XZ. come here. i just wanna talk. you are being so loud today sir. 🤡🤡🤡🤡

AS FOR THE PERFORMANCE ITSELF.

Outstanding. As expected of GG. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

There is something so soft and shy in the way he performed it. As if he is confessing to the person he loves how much he feels. This person knows — but not this way. Not this deep. This is him finally saying what his love is like.

He is also happy. This love makes him whole. It’s so nice to see him this way!

@rainbowsky already mentioned the way we are excited and crying because of it’s connection to Leslie Cheung which is the main thing in conversations. is this xz’s way of dedicating the song to the love of his life in public?

and the lyrics need no further interpretation, it’s such a sweet and simple song about one’s devotion.

so it’s not just xz singing this love song and us clowning. it’s years of clues and references — which now feels like a lead up to this “confession”. 💕

P.S: my main boxiao and moon post is obviously not updated for some time. so just search for “moon” on this blog for other references but y’all know tumblr will still not show everything.

P.P.S: i wanna bring back the moon landing watch. one of the strongest moon cpn out there that honestly feels like an urban legend now the way we never saw it again. lol. it was too loud they probably decided that wyb shouldn’t wear it again in public 😅😅😅😅

END.

[cece693]

Enemy (Edward Cullen x Werewolf GN! Reader)

Summary: Imprinting was supposed to be a good thing, not for you though. Fate seemed to be mocking you by having your imprint be a leech—Edward Cullen, to be more specific.

tags: gender-neutral reader, reader is a werewolf, post-Eclipse, Edward is your imprint, mentions of wanting to be dead, no established relationship

You were on enemy land, yet you didn’t care. Let them come. Let them do their worst. Maybe it’d be a mercy, a reprieve from the torment you’d been living. The trees around you stretched endlessly, their branches clawing at the sky like the fingers of ghosts, haunting you with every step you took into Cullen's territory.

Imprinting on a vampire—it should’ve been your death sentence. An abomination, they called it. The whispers, the disgusted glares, the sneers from your packmates. Your family wouldn’t even look you in the eye. So, why not wander where you weren't wanted? Why not provoke those you should be avoiding?

A snap of a twig echoed through the forest, and you halted, every muscle tensing. You knew he was there. You always knew. It was a curse, this damn imprinting, a cruel joke from the universe to force you to feel everything for the last person you should.

“Edward,” you spat, the bitterness in your voice impossible to hide. “I know you’re watching me. You may as well come out.” Silence stretched and then he emerged—graceful, quiet, like a shadow having been given a form. His golden eyes were fixed on you with such an intensity, it made your blood boil.

“You shouldn’t be here.” he said, his voice irritatingly soft, like he actually cared about your wellbeing.

A laugh escaped you, the sound harsh and bitter in the stillness. “And where should I be, huh? With my pack? My family?” You took a step toward him, your fists clenching at your sides. “Because let’s be honest, they’d prefer me dead. I imprinted on a vampire, Edward. That makes me as good as a traitor to them.” You forced yourself to meet his gaze, defiance burning in your eyes. “And you—you hate me, too. Don’t pretend you don’t.”

Edward’s expression tightened, but he didn’t break eye contact. That infuriating calm, as if nothing could shake him. It only fueled your anger. “I don’t hate you.” he whispered.

“Oh, don’t lie,” you snapped, shaking your head. “I know you do. How could you not? I broke up your happy little life with Bella, didn’t I? You were supposed to be with her, not be tied to…” You gestured toward yourself with a bitter laugh, “…whatever this is.”

A flicker of something crossed his face—pain, perhaps regret—but it was quickly replaced by his usual composure. “Bella and I were never meant to last,” he said with great honesty in his voice, catching you off guard. “We loved each other, but things changed. We changed. It was my choice to let her go.”

“Your choice?” You scoffed, narrowing your eyes. “Then why are you even here, Edward? Why bother with me? I’m just a mess—your sworn enemy, for crying out loud. If you hate this as much as I do, then do us both a favor and end it.”

He moved so quickly that you barely registered the motion. One second, he was standing a few feet away, the next he was in front of you, his hand gripping your arm with a surprising gentleness that left you frozen. His eyes bored into yours, a fire burning in their depths. “I told you, I don’t hate you,” he repeated, his voice edged with a hint of frustration. “And you’re not a mess, not to me.”

“You’re…” He hesitated, his jaw tightening as he searched for the right words. “You’re my imprint. I didn’t ask for this, nor did you, but here we are. And I…I can’t stand to see you like this. I won’t lie and say it’s easy,” he admitted.

“But that doesn’t mean it’s wrong. We can’t change what happened, but we can try to make something of it. Maybe we start with being friends?"

You barked a laugh, though it was devoid of humor. “Friends,” you echoed, tasting the word like it was foreign. “You think we can be friends?”

“It’s a start,” he said, his voice gentle but firm. “And maybe, in time, it can be more. If we both want it to be.”

The vulnerability in his words caught you off guard. You expected pity, maybe even indifference, but not this—this honest hope that things could be different. You let out a shaky breath, feeling some tension drain from your shoulders. “Alright,” you murmured, the fight leaving you. “Friends…We can try.”

A small, tentative smile crept onto Edward’s lips, and for a moment, warmth spread through your chest, easing some of the ache that had settled there. It wasn’t a solution, not by far, but it was a beginning.

[maikissed]

cherry flavoured lips 2

Kylian Mbappé x reader

She did numb the confusion, with many other feelings on the way.  angst

part 1 is here

! a little note: the events in this fic are placed in time when Kylian still played for PSG. an important note: This is pure fiction. A name appears in this story, that might be associated with a real person, however I do not attribute anything negative to anyone in real life. I do not know personally any original person that appears in this story. So to sum up: no hate, just love.

If there are any blinding misspells, I'm sorry.

The next day Fleur greeted her with the most sour and condemning look on her face known to mankind. The next day weather turned gloomy, sun hid far behind many grey clouds, it looked like it was going to pour heavily. The next day her mother started to emphasize with regret that she has made too much pie and it is a shame that Kylian had to leave so soon. The next day she could not even look at the big fruit bowl full of freshly picked cherries, placed at the centre of the breakfast table. The next day she felt her heart break to a great extent, to the point of tears welling up in her eyes. But no tear has fallen down her cheek, she could not cry the way she used to every single time she was forced to watch Kylian with a new girl on his arm. Because it was never a subject, she never brought it up and their friendship stayed safe, despite the despair reaping on her heart. The next day she was not so sure they would survive anymore. She blamed him, she blamed herself. She blamed love and her most likely dead heart.

The day before, in the late evening, after the events in the cherry orchards, he knocked on the doors to her bedroom. She let him in, she agreed the conversation was crucial, but there were things that he was not familiar with and she was immensely afraid to speak with him about it. She wasn’t really sure what caused such distress on her side, why couldn’t she live freely, just like he was? She did not owe him anything.

His presence in her room weakened her, she was not so resolved anymore. She remembered his touch, his breath and his lips on her and how she thrived in this intimate moment between them. She was floating in his embrace while it lasted, while it felt right and fulfilling. Until the reality hit back in like the end of the world. And there he was now, standing confidently in front of her, with his dark, intimidating gaze swallowing her whole. She tightened the tails of the satin bathrobe around her body and took few steps back to sit on the big armchair in the corner of the room, bending her legs in the knees to let them rest on her side. Her eyes locked with his.

“Speak to me” he started, no embarrassment in his voice. Always so sure, always so assured.

Was he so confident he could have her now? When he wanted? Or continue to play with her as he seen fit?

“I’m seeing someone” a shot, like a gunfire.

She could see him freeze, sat on the verge of her king-size bed. Fingers intertwined between his legs, a question visible in his eyes.

“For six months now” she added, feeling her throat tightening.

Somehow she wanted to have a fight with him. She wondered what would it take for him to pick it up. Maybe she’ll have to provoke him.

“You haven’t said anything” he murmured, his eyes lowered, focused on his hands connected on his lap.

“Were you always informing me about your girlfriends straight away?” her voice raw.

Tears close.

He bit his lower lip, as if fighting the urge to leer or laugh at her.

“You always found out at some point” when he looked up at her again there was some form of cruel wrath hiding behind his eyes.

“Yes” she whispered “Yes, I did” her eyes glazing. No, fight it, she reminded herself.

“We were always telling each other everything. Why was this a secret for such a long time?” his voice broke a little at the end. A sign of hurt, distrust.

“I wanted to be sure. Wanted to keep this to myself for a while before you would ruin it for me yet again.”

He frowned in displease. These were harsh words, an accusation.

“Tonight, you almost did” her gaze sharp, composed.

“I had no idea” he answered in defence.

But it was not what she meant.

“I appreciate your friendship, Kylian. You truly mean the world to me. But I don’t always seem to read your intentions correctly” finally, her voice started to shake a little. She was expecting that. She could stand in a fight with any person in the world, being the most collected and composed while doing so, but not with Kylian. Especially right now, when she knew the outcome of it might be deadly for both of them “Do you remember our first kiss when we were fifteen? I knew it was an experiment but it absolutely messed with my head back then. I was about to attend the school ball with Adrien as my partner. I stood him up.”

His eyes turned bigger while he listened. He opened him mouth to say something, but she did not let him.

“Or that night in Paris few years ago, when you got so drunk I had to make sure you made it home safely. I stayed the night since you asked so nicely” the mere memories of these moments made her tremble. She wondered if he had any idea how perfectly fucked up she was because of him, by him “I spent the night in your bed, sleeping next to you. You touched me and kissed me before you completely blacked out. The next day I found out you were involved with Emma” the way she spat the words out was vicious. The stupor in his features made way for abashment “And now you’re doing it again” she continued, not looking his way anymore “Coming as you please, going as you please. I am a person, you cannot play with my feelings like it means nothing”

“Why are you putting it this way? It’s not like that” he objected.

It felt strange to finally, after so many years, let it all out, to finally admit the truth behind their relationship over the years. She was carrying it hidden far too long. But there was the dark and painful truth next to it, the fact that if they were about to set all the things clear, they would have to set boundaries, resulting in them growing apart. But she was always choosing him first, maybe it was the time to choose herself, like her father always taught her.

“Maybe you haven’t noticed, but I sacrificed a lot for you” breath stuck in her throat for a moment, a very bad sign of the possibility of breaking down in front of him.

He knew her sadness, he was familiar with her tears, although at this moment, she felt the need to act resolved. Distant.

“I do know that you love me” her voice so soft, soft but somehow cruel, like a stab in his guts. He was lacking air in his lungs “But I was never your first choice” a miserable sob coming out of her.

He felt the urge to stand up, to comfort her but he seemed the be the villain in this story. A tragic thing really, that he was not aware of the stupidity of his actions thorough the years.

“It took me too long to realise that I grew out of the simple love I had for you as a lifetime friend” he started, now nervously, now less composed.

He never considered himself a romantic soul. Found it difficult for himself to care, to speak in language of love, to show someone his devotion and adoration. It was one of the main reasons why his past relationships fell apart rather quickly, him always being the guilty one for the lack of affection. Cold and cruel, were the words he heard so often, the women in his life walking away from him with their broken hearts on theirs palms, their eyes red, puffy, full of suffering and deception. Impassivity and torpor on his side as he moved on with his life.

But it was different with her. Because the only person he only, truly and infinitely loved was her. It took him so long. He never felt his heart break, he never suspect it could even have a sound, yet there it was - her tortured and cracking voice declaring rejection, filling his ears. Definition of the broken heart always waking some form of derision in him, now suddenly so clear and so painful he could not believe it real. A misery.

“You have every right to punish me for it” he tried to catch her gaze from distance, but she was stubborn in avoiding it “But please, let me change that” he tried to stand up but felt himself glued to the bed. It was the very first time he opened this way to anyone “You are the only person that has my heart, you always were. It might be a bad moment to finally voice it out, but…”

“It is” she interrupted him. And if her earlier words felt like a merciless stab, these felt like the final execution.

Like a dream, a very bad one. The one that leaves you with that hollow and swallowing feeling of anxiety when you wake up, terrified and abandoned. She turned cold, merciless, something he never experienced on her side, something unknown.

-Two years ago-

“Ky, you’re heavy, I know you can stand on your own, stop it” she whined with a little laugh at the end when they reached the doors to his apartment. His arm tightly wrapped around her shoulders as he leaned into her, claiming that he was way too worn out to even stand straight.

Of all the things, Kylian chose to turn into a real mess tonight. He never drank too much alcohol but this year he declared it was the right time for him to enjoy freedom and carefreeness. And y/n knew one thing for sure: Kylian could not handle his alcohol and the results led into him turning into the whiniest and most stubborn creature she struggled to stand. However, she had to admit, that he was even funnier while drunk. That was bringing her enjoyment. And her little tipsy state added to that, of course.

“Alright, there we go” she cooed as she pressed him against the kitchen counter, her gaze already searching for the location of the kettle. He was keeping himself straight just fine “You need some warm water, or maybe a tea, but bitter. Are you going to puke tonight?” she asked with a funny look on her face.

He smirked, his eyes small, lids heavy, he needed rest definitely. He blinked slowly and she giggled before he placed his hands behind her back, low, embracing her close, his face resting in the crook of her neck.

“I need my bed” he murmured against her skin there, causing ticklish goose bumps to spread all over her body and she laughed, trying to get him off, but for a person that claimed to have no strength to move, he was quite persistent in holding into her.

“Okay, you big baby, let’s go then”

“You smell so nice” he murmured, leaning away with a sweet, yet tired smile on his face.

Like a spell casted upon her, she felt her limbs weakening under his hazy gaze, her chest filling with a warm and tender feeling at the sight of him. He looked so boyish, it almost made her want to kiss him. But she stepped away, taking a hold of his hand, he kept watching her attentively.

“Come” she added, heading in the direction of his bedroom.

“A shower would be nice” he mumbled, reaching back to take off the t-shirt he was wearing “But I don’t think I am able to do it now” he considered, almost like talking to himself.

“Yeah” she laughed “Go to sleep, you can shower in the morning” she watched him carelessly toss the clothing on the floor.

“Unless you are willing to help me?” he started, facing her and in the same moment his fingers reached to undo the belt of his trousers. His eyes on her.

Her eyes, on the other hand, were too low, she realised. She brought them back up quickly, her skin heating up at the realisation of being caught. Because she knew he noticed. He just casually, shamelessly flirted with her, comfortably undressing himself while doing so.

“Did you bump your head on the way home? I haven’t registered that” she snickered playfully to which he answered with a low laugh, making her even more flustered than before.

She could not keep her eyes up, it was a torment. The belt tossed aside, pants still on, with the top button simply undone.

“You are a cold woman” he muttered under his nose, and then, his next question, substantially knocked her off her feet: “Stay with me?”

They were eleven the last time they slept in the same bed.

“I have an exam tomorrow morning, I should go back home” she stated, her tone more serious now.

“Come on, it’s online. You can log in to class here as well. Don’t leave me alone on my birthday” he argued stepping closer to where she stood, taking her hands in his, a plea visible on his face, his eyes round and begging and glassy in the drunken state “Please?” she snorted at that, meanwhile realising that he drew the best card. She could not say no to him, ever.

“Technically, your birthday was two hours ago” he rolled his eyes at her smart answer “And if you wanted company so much, you could have grabbed yourself a lady for the night” her eyes hard but amusement dancing in them as she gazed up at him. Focusing on looking into his eyes, not fucking lower, not on his bare chest so close to her.

“Hm. I thought I have”

“Alright!” she called stepping away from him, feeling nervous all of a sudden “Get your ass in bed, I have to change. Gonna borrow your clothes”

“Help yourself!” he called after her after she passed him, heading in the direction of the wardrobe.

She struggled with choosing the right kind of clothes to join him in a shared bed. She considered this situation rather unusual and difficult. She was not stupid, she knew that such distress was caused by unequivocal feelings she had for him for a long time now. Which is why her attitude towards him changes drastically, fear of these feelings not being reciprocal paralysed her. She felt like standing on the edge of a cliff, way too willing to take a step and fall right to her death.

Blunt enough of her, she decided on wearing just one of his shirts. Shorts ignored. Her heart threatening to jump out of her chest.

But when she came back to his room, Kylian was already asleep, which should not be a huge surprise. At the same time she felt some form of relief but also disappointment. After turning off the night lamp she carefully dived under the sheets, next to him, making sure to not stir him out his peaceful rest. Relaxing against the pillows, she faced the ceiling, slowly the heat radiating of his body reached her and she shivered, the temperature in the room seemed to be rather low.

But suddenly she gasped softly when she felt his hand sneaking around her belly, the touch being sure and prominent. And when his arm snaked around her form, palm resting on her side, he pulled her into the front of his body. She turned her head to look at him, the beating of her heart increasing again. His eyes remained closed, she concluded he must have acted reflexively, still in his sleep.

“You’re shivering” his voice startled her, turned out he was not asleep, or maybe she in fact woke him up “Come here” he murmured, his hand resting on her side gently pushing her to turn his way.

She faced him, closely.

“Well, maybe because you sleep in a freezer” she whispered softly, but here was no witty response from him.

What he did next was slide his hand lower, down her thigh and she absolutely froze when he put his hand on the inner side of her knee and hiked it up to let her leg rest above his hip. She wondered how much his actions were conscious and not acted in the haze of sleep and alcohol fogged perception. She wondered, because then his touched followed the same path back, along her thigh, softly, over her backside, to press harder just above it, to keep her closer. His palm stayed there, under the shirt she was wearing, the clothing now hiked up, her lower body almost bare. This position was uncomfortable but she was not focused on it completely. She was putting a real fight to keep her breath steady but there seemed to be no point in trying to calm her rising pulse. Many sensations were taking over her body and she feared them. And she was not cold anymore, let’s underline this for a fact. But it was still uncomfortable, her hand bent under her body in a strange way, she had to move a little, readjust to this position. Or maybe move away from him? He seemed to be asleep back again. But when she did move, he moved as well, her now freed hand fell down on the pillow and his head rested on it. His embrace on her tightening, it felt too intimate. Too intimate for friends. She could not control it, she wriggled again, it was more like an impulse, really. Her head was placed a bit above his, his face snuggled into her neck. And when she moved she could feel his lips press against her skin there, hot and moist, he placed a kiss on her throat. She went rigid.

“Stop squirming so much, love” he mumbled against her skin and there came another tender kiss after it.

Few more seconds has passed and she confirmed he was already back deep in his sleep, still clinging into her passionately. Meanwhile her head was a mess, sleep seemed to not come as salvation.

The next day she sneaked out rather early, trying to collect herself and not think too much about passed night. She had a quite busy Sunday planned. First the art history exam, then her mother visited her in the late afternoon. She was seated at the table while her mother kept bustling around the kitchen, determined to prepare something homemade and healthy for dinner, always concerned about her daughter’s eating habits. Y/n looked at her phone as soon as she heard a new message notification. It was Gia. A message and a photo attached to it.

“What a disgrace” Gia’s message said.

Y/n squinted her eyes to see better what the picture presented. Football stadium’s stands, Kylian seated amongst some people she did not recognize and did not care to recognize, and Emma, next to him - her she recognized. She frowned questioningly. Something prickly and concerning building under her sternum.

“Wym? Is the pic even recent?” she responded back.

“It’s today’s PSG game. Heard they’re dating. She was all over him for the past year” she read her friend’s another message, her eyes glued to the three words.

Hell, that’s new. Emma was not even present on his birthday party last night. Smelled like a nasty fib. Y/n knew he had many friends, although girls were not in his tightest pack in general. It awoke some doubts in her. What was he doing? She did not respond to the text, but already spotted three moving dots under it, a sign that Gia was typing something else.

“Straighten him up, he cannot be serious with her”

Yet she had no intention to dwell into it, having a conversation about this new revelation and their last night together was the last thing on her mind, she had an intention to take the closest flight to England and focus back on her university, on her own life. Swallowing her nerves and numbing the confusion, she muted her phone, leaving it on the table and heading to her room. Silently, with no explanation for her mother despite her calls behind her. She did numb the confusion, with many other feelings on the way. 

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

The salt of life

Disclaimer: This makes no sense, it's just a list of Sydcarmy musings and analogies but I wanted to share it anyway.

In culinary metaphors

Syd is affecting Carmy like TABLE salt affects mixes in bakery. She enhances Carmy’s flavor, but does not change it. That’s not always a good thing. It all depends on finding the right balance and timing and ensuring the ingredients are correctly mixed because otherwise, the whole thing is ruined.

Salt is dangerous. As a matter of fact, it can kill you.

Salt is basically sodium. Sodium is poison when incorrectly used, but it also makes the ❤️ beat when its levels are balanced out with the potassium in our blood.

In medical terms

Syd is the heart.

Carmy is the circulatory system that would dry up and die unless the heart irrigates it.

The Bear, their place, is the blood. The family.

What makes the heart beat is electricity.

They generate this power. This spark. And it can get out of control, like all sparks, of course.

That’s the chemistry they create when they are together → Beating.

None make sense without the other, BECAUSE THEY FORM A SYSTEM, is you separate the veins and arteries from the heart and the blood, they are simply lifeless. Isolated they don't make much sense.

THEY ARE A SYSTEM. THE MAIN SYSTEM.

How that system works

She lit the spark in him and gave him a heart when he was used to being a robot who only worked and smoked the competition.

Sydney could definitely work without Carmy, but at this point, it wouldn't make sense for her. She would feel lifeless, even if she wins 100 stars elsewhere. Her place is The Bear, the restaurant and the chef. Because that's what she chose with her heart.

Carmy has worked and thrived without her and wouldn't do it again unless it's out of spite, just to show her.

However, I don't think it'll come to that like it once did with Michael, or his parents, he has learned that lesson the hard way by now.

Carmy works as a SYSTEM, as part of something bigger than him, if he becomes isolated, S3 Carmy takes the wheel. He doesn't work like that, he crashes and burns.

But during most of S3 the "spark" Syd ignited in him, the one that got the blood flowing again, gave him a heart, a purpose, where there was only a hurt man who felt so much pain that couldn't even express it and thus, sublimated it in the form of a work addiction and functional depression, and therefore couldn't overcome it either, got out of control.

The SYSTEM was broken, because the elements that formed it attempted to work separately. There was no synergy, just energy that was out of balance. Not completely, but mostly.

Back to the salt

I have already gone over the analogy between Carmy and onions, acid, etc. Most in the fandom have, but here's a reminder of what I think about that:

So, the result of mixing culinary purpose salt (table salt) with acid ingredients is a WEAKER ACID.

We can all agree on Carmy being "intense", right?

Well, when in contact with her he can calibrate himself better.

I emphasize "contact" because when they are OUT OF TOUCH, the effect is almost instantaneous and painfully obvious in Carmy, which has always been, and in S3 it started to become more apparent in her too, as you can see in these previous entries:

They belong together to balance each other out, when there's this distance between them, that we saw in S3, THEY ARE IMBALANCED.

Salt is the balancer ingredient in any recipe. It enhances what needs to be enhanced and neutralizes what needs to be neutralized if used correctly

But salt on its own is no good, it needs to work as part of a recipe, a dish, A SYSTEM.

She's the salt, his salt, the one that brought flavor back to his life, and that's why his story re-started the day she came into his life. Carmy and all that he represents, the restaurant he inherited, the family in it, the family business that Cicero keeps funding, the extended family now Syd found at The Bear, is the system. He is a system that needs to be balanced and sometimes neutralized. Salt is the main ingredient for him, because he lacks of it, he's acid.

Bonus track: Le Chatelier's principle

I have mentioned this before but it bears repeating→ When her dishes were out of balance it was always because of the "acid" ingredient, which means she's outta balance too. Carmy doesn't balance her, he doesn't have that effect on her. In chemistry, acids tend to dissolve salt BUT they can create NEW SALTS too (Le Chatelier's principle). She's fighting this because she knows that once she fully lets Carmy in, it's gonna be the end of the world as she knows it. She won't be able to fight it much longer after this breaking point ↓

Remember to follow my tag #Gingerpovs 💋

[satorisoup]

people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T

tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3

[trunklewunjle]

I did some twists and turns to the Dreamtale I included in the server me an my friends rp in, and I’ve been kinda hyper fixated so I did a little thing

I don’t like perspective but im going to have to eventually learn, soul shattering I will never be the same once i dominate it

Yea the fucking tree told him to shoot night because everyone is so mean to him so I just yknow she might as well also be mean to a fucking seven year old who knew no better 

Dreamtale (Dream and Nightmare) Belong to Jokublog

[pickled-flowers]

Saw some of the grossest parenting today in the bus

[laceratedlamiaceae]

Jack and Izzy crying

[sysig]

When you weren’t looking (Patreon)

[alwaysoc]