not me getting excited bc there were taylor swift tickets “available” but when i enter it asks for a code
it’s not ‘available’ if i need a specific code to buy, you fucking assholes
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Guy in the men's room at the library today got Big Mad that I came in to use the stall. He kept saying, "This is the men's bathroom" and "I know I'm a man; I was born with a dick" and various other transphobias. Kept talking shit to the point that I couldn't focus on peeing & getting out of there.
I finally yelled at him to shut the fuck up in my deepest, butchiest voice. He was arguing with me, saying he needed to shit (he had been standing talking to himself in front of the mirror before I came in, so I sorta doubt it). I told him to leave me alone so I could use the restroom. Or that he could use the women's bathroom himself. Thankfully, I'd texted my partner, who came in to help. A librarian also got involved. And this guy kept saying that I was harassing him and that I'd looked like a girl when I walked in. He threatened to call the cops (but didn't). The librarian told him he had to leave, and after some arguing with them, he finally did so. I'm very thankful I had support and allies around me.
So, idk where this fabled male privilege that I supposedly have was in that moment. Maybe it was hiding in my long hair. Maybe I left it home with the binder I barely ever use. Maybe my beard and voice weren't enough to make me pass. Maybe it was too high for me (a whole 5 foot nothing) to reach when I needed it. Or maybe, just maybe... people clock me as trans and therefore my would-be male privilege is extremely conditional based on how much I'm able or willing to conform to the gender binary (which I have no interest in doing).
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day 2 of being fully unemployed now and I'm starting to feel bad about quitting even though the job I had was awful for my physical health and also stopping any sort of growth for myself or my art. I spent all my time at work I had barely any time to work on projects or build my portfolio. but I just feel like I was put on this earth to be a "lazy" artist.... like not everybody has to be a engineer or a scientist or a accountant. I was not built for the jobs that pay you a liveable wage. I think we need artists and I suppose I'm one of them
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Thinking about steddie future where they're both just average guys. No rockstars, no basketball players just two Normal men living a normal life because honestly? they deserve it. They deserve soft domesticity and happiness.
They both have jobs they like but don't love and they're happy with that. Eddie maybe becomes an electrician, working for someone else's company. His coworkers are chill, he gets to get out and work with his hands and that's more than he could have asked for. Steve is a physical therapist, or a manager in some business. He likes his team and the steady hours. He's not working for his dad which is a plus.
They buy a house together, that's not a mansion but it's not a trailer either. Steve does a lot of the dishes because Eddie hates it, hates the feeling of old food on the plates and cutlery. So Eddie will kiss Steve on the cheek and does the laundry because Steve fucking hates laundry. And sitting on the floor watching TV while he folds clothes is honestly sort of relaxing?? Love is doing the chores your partner hates.
Steve and Robin go out for brunch at least once a month, where they catch up and gossip for hours and hours and Steve comes home lighter with updates on Robin and Vickie. Eddie will have nightly phone calls with Wayne, where they talk and laugh and Eddie will eventually hand the phone over to Steve so he and Wayne can talk sports together. When he's in town Dustin will come over and stay in their spare room and they laugh and joke so much it's just like old times. They go over to Jeff's house for dinner on a semi regular basis, and it's nice having normal friends.
They adopt a very annoying cat who will climb all over them in bed and meow in their faces when they don't wake up to feed it breakfast in time. Steve will go for jogs on a Saturday morning, coming home to Eddie reading in bed. Some old western book Wayne recommended to him. There's a steaming cup of coffee waiting on their bedside tables that Eddie's prepared.
They take time off of work and go on a week long vacation because they can do that now. They do dorky touristy things and Eddie buys a mug to send to Wayne. Steve takes a lot of dorky photos of the two of them.
Idk they deserve to be normal and alive and happy with no upside down anymore <3
Oh I love this! I had actually been thinking about tradesman Eddie for a little bit I am so, so glad you’ve come up with this!
I can so completely see him learning a trade and just getting employed and put through his time by a small local employer! He has to go through his exams and that part of it worries him when he first gets the job but his team end up being really supportive and Steve stays up late with him, practicing circuits and wiring and quizzing him on currents and volts. Eddie returning the favour, letting Steve mark up his muscles and be a living anatomy dummy. Sure it gets a little sexy from time to time but more often than not it’s just them testing each other as Steve identifies bones and Eddie talks about parallel circuits.
The monthly brunches mentally and physically revive Steve after working extended hours with patients that he really does want the best for but a jobs a job and it can get pretty tiring. They joke that they rebalance each others chakras but they really do feel realigned after their meet ups. Eddie can see it to, sometimes he’ll come pick them up when it’s been a boozy brunch and delights in seeing them happy and light, clambering over each other to tell Eddie something about one of the waiters or an especially good dish they ordered. When he drops Robin home Steve sits in the front and looks at peace and Eddie feels the same way.
Their weekends are for them, sometimes that means staying home and cleaning the whole place between ordering food in and sometimes that means going on a day trip and taking Wayne around all the antique spots around the county and seeing what horrors they can uncover. Top spot currently sits with Wayne’s find of a doll whose limbs had been replaced with horse legs and had the head of a fish. Of course they bought it.
Every time they go on a holiday they make sure to send postcards to everyone, including themselves, seeing if they’ll get home before the postcard does. Steve keeps them in a photo album, each with a Polaroid of them next to it. Sometimes taken by a stranger, sometimes just a close up of their faces squashed together. It’s Eddie’s favourite thing to go through on their anniversary, or any day really, just loves being reminded that this is the life they get to have.
It’s mundane, dare say even normal, but they love it. Steve comes home every night, happy to put his scrubs in the washing machine next to Eddie’s uniform, happy to be where he feels loved.
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My Eras Tour show just got cancelled.
I purchased the tickets more than a year ago.
More than one year of dreaming about it.
I'm experiencing the strangest combination of feelings, a mix of gut wrenching rage and also relief for not being involved in a t*rrorist attack? I don't know, man.
I just know I can't bear to look at the outfit I chose for tomorrow night. I can't bear to listen to any of Taylor's songs right now.
I hope it doesn't forever ruin my memories of Wien.
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