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#i know everyone's going through it. don't want to worry more people. but also i do.
ssailormoonn · 2 days
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❛ HE CARES !! ❜
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Genin! Sasuke Uchiha X Fem!Genin!Reader
WC; 700+ | !MDNI! | TW/CW :: same warning as my other genin sasuke work, no triggers apart from sasuke himself, x fem reader, reader is apart of team 7, reader is a genin, reader is a ninja
⋆·˚ ༘ *𝑅𝐸𝒬𝒰𝐸𝒮𝒯 :: (filled request) genin sasuke x fem or gn reader where he catches them crying over something(plot is up to you) and tries to comfort them? lots of fluff and maybe hints of a closer relationship? :0 - ANON
m.list | naruto/boruto m.list | uchiha m.list
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Sasuke had always been observant.
He didn't say much, but he saw things.
He saw how hard you were training.
He saw you were doing all this for him, but he said nothing, he didn't want to embarrass you.
That must have been why he'd noticed you in the first place, too. You were doing it for him, but you weren't making it obvious; you were yourself.
But today was different.
Sasuke was on his way back from his own training when he saw you sitting beneath a large tree near the training grounds. Hunched over- head resting on your knees, even from a distance, he could hear soft, muffled sounds, crying.
He felt his heart ache.
Sasuke definitely wasn't the type to get involved in other people's problems, but seeing you there, obviously crying and sad. It tugged at his heart in a way he didn't know. Sasuke had no clue what and why his heart was tugging, but he knew it had something to do with you.
He let out a sigh and then and then found himself walking in your direction. His footsteps were light, but you tensed nonetheless at the soft sound of his approach, how did you even know it was Sasuke? You tried to hastily wipe your tears away, praying to God no one caught you in such a state, especially of all people, Sasuke.
"Hey," he said softly.
You looked up, startled, face red and blotchy from crying. "Sasuke?"
He didn't say a word, at first, only knelt before you. "What's wrong?"
You quickly turned your face away, mortified to be caught sobbing, you were mentally slapping yourself. In front of the guy you liked as well? Terrible, you could just hide away in a hole right now.
"Nothing," you mumbled, trying to regain composure. "It's nothing. I'm fine."
Sasuke's eyes narrowed. "Doesn't look like nothing," he said, a little too bluntly and you flinched slightly, at which his eyes slight widened as he realised his tone.
Oh no, he thought, I don't. want to hurt her more.
You sniffled, wiping at your eyes again. "I just. I'm frustrated, okay? It's stupid."
Sasuke said nothing but waited patiently for you to continue. Your eyes widened as you felt that Sasuke was waiting for you to speak, he wanted to know how you were feeling.
Your heart was about to leap out of your chest.
It wasn't just him being in worry, asking about you. but he was also very close to you-your heart won't be able to take it.
"I've been trying so hard, you know? Training, doing my best. But it just feels like. like it's not enough. I'm not getting stronger fast enough." Your voice cracked slightly. "And I just feel. behind. Like I'm never going to catch up."
Sasuke was silent for a moment, working through what you'd said. He wasn't the best with comforting people, he just didn't get much practice with it given his dead parents and sibling, but he did grasp what you were saying.
Better than anyone in the world, in fact. Better than anyone in the world, he knew what it felt like to think you were never catching up.
"You're not behind," he said finally. "Everyone moves at their own pace. It doesn't mean you're weak."
You blinked in surprise.
It wasn't like Sasuke to offer encouragement like that.
He turned away from you, staring off in the distance, his voice softening a bit. "It's not easy. Getting stronger. it takes time. And it's frustrating. But. you're not alone in that. I get it."
And hearing that from Sasuke... Sasuke who had always been strong, always one step ahead of the rest-made something in your chest come undone. It sounded like he really did understand.
"Thank you," you whispered.
Sasuke's gaze relaxed for a moment before he shook his head quickly, almost awkwardly, He was not used to this, speaking this way, being near someone this way.
With you, though, it didn't feel as odd as he had thought it would.
He liked it.
Sasuke thinks that he might even love you.
He said again, this time with a quieter voice. "You're... not weak. You're one of the few people I actually think has potential." Your heart skipped a beat at that.  Coming from Sasuke, that was probably one of the highest compliments you could get. Lifting your head up to his face, you see the soft pink flush on his cheeks which makes your heart stutter.  He cares about you.  Truly, he does.
You didn't know what to say, so you only inclined your head a little farther, your shoulder brushing against his. It wasn't much for the moment, but it would do.
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Do not copy, steal, modify, use for AI, etc. Relogs and like are appreciated.
m.list | naruto/boruto m.list | uchiha m.list
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taglist :: @enouche @lovelyandproblematic
@sugu-love @why-are-you-still-awake
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coquelicoq · 4 months
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incredibly moved whenever someone tells me that i'm an easy person to be around when they're going through some shit. there's nothing more sacred to me than sitting with someone through death and grief and loss, things that i can't fix or do anything about except be there and let them feel their feelings without having to pretend to be chipper or hopeful or cheeruppable. i can't pretend to feel what i don't feel, which makes me weird and awkward in so many interpersonal situations, but i think it's also what makes people feel comfortable sharing this stuff with me, because they know that i won't judge them and they don't have to perform for me. i feel so lucky when i can provide that for somebody. i wouldn't trade it for anything.
#i wish my friends didn't have to go through hard shitty stuff. but when they do - because we all do sometimes - i am so thankful that#they feel they can share it with me#it's amazing how much a difference it makes to just be there and be genuine and not burden them with expectations#of how they should be reacting to something. like i guess that's pretty rare#and i sort of stumbled into it by being incapable of faking emotion. so i couldn't be fake chipper even if i wanted to#idk i feel like my first reaction when someone says this is like. i didn't even do anything?#but sometimes that's what you need! i think people get so in their head about doing and saying the exact right thing#and somehow 'fixing' someone's pain#when what actually matters is just being there. even if you don't know what to say. even if there's nothing you can do#just being there and letting them be sad. so they don't have to also be alone while they're sad#i can't make my friends less sad & that's almost never my goal. they're sad bc sad shit is happening. they need to be allowed to feel it#which i think probably also stems from my own history of depression and suicidality and the ways that people have reacted to that#i'm sure trying to help me but in reality actually just making me feel like i couldn't talk to anyone about it#because everyone just needed me to be okay#but i wasn't okay. and being expected to pretend like i was so other people wouldn't have to worry was making it harder#and more isolating. so i guess i just never want anyone to feel like if they're in pain they have to be alone#grief#relationships#my posts
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technologyvoid · 1 year
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Ok, alright
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talkdutchtome · 6 months
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"Let me take care of you" - Max Verstappen
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pairing . . . max verstappen x reader )
genre . . . smut )
summary . . . after a disastrous race, you take care of max the best way you know how )
warning . . . smut, 18+ MINORS DNI, oral (m receiving), p in v, unprotected sex, creampie, nipple play, use of petnames, sub!max, very soft dom!reader, traumatized maxie, not proofread )
word count . . . 2800 words )
a/n . . . this actually ended up a lot more emotional than i intended it to be but i hope everyone likes it anyway. i don't know if my smut writing is getting better or worse tbh. any and all feedback is always appricated <3 )
Max was a perfectionist; anyone could see that. He also had a desire to win like nobody else. He never let up. It didn’t matter to him if it was a title deciding race or a completely meaningless one, he needed to win. It had been instilled in him for as long as he could remember; second place is first loser after all. So naturally, when his brakes failed, and his car very literally caught fire in the Australian Grand Prix causing him to have to retire three laps into the race; you knew he was not going to take it well.  
You were watching along in the garage, and the only thing you could think about as his smoking car pulled up to the pits was how hard on himself he was going to be. The fact that it was through no fault of his own was irrelevant. He had just handed a win to Ferrari, and that made his blood boil.  
In typical Max fashion, you barely saw him after he retired too. He gave you a quick hug as he reached the garage but after that it was straight back to business. He made his way to the pit wall and immediately began discussing with Christian and GP what exactly happened and how do they fix it for Japan. He sent you a text that he was going to stay late at the track with the mechanics so that you should just head back to the hotel.  
Truthfully, Max was avoiding you. You had only been dating Max for a couple of months, and so far you had only seen him dominate on track. And whilst you were concerned that that he would be beating himself up for disappointing himself or the team, he was busy focusing on how he had disappointed you. You had taken time out of your busy university schedule to travel to the other side of the world to see him race, and he had to retire three laps in. He was used to people living through him, taking his wins as theirs. He had never considered that all you cared about that he was safe and didn’t get hurt.  
So, you went to the hotel and waited for him; or at least you tried to. Tiredness and jet lag eventually started to catch up to you, and you had just started to drift off to sleep when you heard the door open. Looking up greet Max, you could see immediately how heavy the weight he bore on his shoulders hung.  
“Hey baby, how are you feeling?” You asked him sleep in your voice still evident. Max just hung his head and walked into the bathroom. He half expected you to berate him. To question him on exactly what went wrong and what he’s going to do to fix it.  
“Maxie?” You asked again, as he came in from the bathroom and made his way to his side of the bed, his eyes routed to the floor. This time he just grunted at you in response before getting into bed and turning away from you. He did not have the energy to be told everything he did wrong and why - he had already had that from his dad.  
“Please talk to me Maxie, I’m worried.” You pleaded at him, fighting the urge to wrap your arms around him. You wanted that more than anything, but you sensed that he maybe didn’t feel the same.  
“What do you want Y/N?” He finally spoke, his voice cracking.  
“Are you okay? I know that was tough result to take but it’s only once race. We both know you’ll be back better than ever for the next one.”  
To your words, Max just grunted again. And this time you couldn’t help but reach over to hold him. Wrapping one of your arms around his waist and the other coming up to brush through his hair. You waited cautiously for him to pull away. A moment passed and he began to move, your heart sank; he clearly didn’t want to be anywhere near you right now. But instead of moving away, he just turned around, bringing himself closer to you, resting his head on your chest.  
“I just hate to let the team down” he spoke, his voice no more than a whisper, like he wasn’t 100% convinced if he should be saying anything.  
“But baby you didn’t let them down, you did nothing wrong. There was an issue with the car that isn’t your fault.” You gazed down at his face, your hands smoothing through his hair.  
“I could have done something. Maybe I pushed the brakes too much. Maybe I went too hard. All I know is that I let the team down. I let my dad down. I let you down. You cam-“ He started to ramble, but you had heard enough.   
“Whoa Max baby slow down. I can’t speak for the team or your dad, but you certainly did not let me down. All that matters to me is that you didn’t get hurt. I was so worried; you were literally driving a car that was on fire. You could have been hurt.”  
As the words left your mouth, he looked up at you. Almost as if he was trying to see if you were telling the truth. When his eyes met yours and he realized you were being sincere, he hugged tighter into you.  
“I love you Y/N” he spoke and before you could say anything, you felt him bring his mouth to your neck. Leaving hot open-mouthed kisses from your collarbone up to until he met your mouth. His lips crashed against yours. The kiss was hungry and desperate. His hands found your hair and his teeth nipped at your lips. He quickly found himself getting lost in you and you weren’t too far behind. But when his hands wandered towards the bottom of your pajama top, you had to pull away.  
“Wait, Maxie. Are you sure you want to do this? You’ve had a rough day, are you sure you want to do this. We could just go to sleep if you’d prefer.” You didn’t want him to feel like this was something he needed to do.  
But when his lips once again found your neck, it was clear you had your answer. “Please” he mumbled against your skin “I just want to forget” between each word he left a kiss on your neck, before beginning to nibble against that one spot on your neck that he knew always sent you completely insane. He left deep purple marks all down your neck and you couldn’t help but let a moan slip through your lips.  
You were about to completely cave into his touch before you had an idea, and before you could overthink whether it was a good idea, you swung your legs over him until you had him pinned underneath you, your legs either side of his. A smirk plastered across your face 
Max looked completely taken aback at your action, but the second you leant down to kiss him, your lips just slightly brushing against his; he was starstruck and could feel himself growing harder by the second, which only deepened your smirk.  
“Let me take care of you baby” you whispered in his ear before beginning to grind your core against him. The whimper that left Max’s lips took you both by surprise but, taking that as confirmation that he wanted you to take control; you attached your lips to his neck, trailing kisses down his chest until you reached the waistband of his underwear. It was clear from the way that his hard dick strained against the cloth that Max was enjoying this new side of you, and you could be lying if you said it didn’t give you a bit of a confidence boost. 
You started to tease him, placing warm kisses over his underwear, but when you hear him try and fail to beg you to touch him, it becomes clear that maybe today isn’t the day to tease him. So, you hook your fingers around his waistband and release him from the tight confines of the cloth. Immediately, your mouth found his cock, your lips wrapping around his tip. Max’s moans filled the air as he came apart like putty in your hands. The way that your tongue swirled around him made him go crazy. He reached out his hands to grab your hair in a makeshift pony, but you dodged him. Max honestly thought he was going to cry when you took your mouth off him. 
“No baby, I told you I was going to take care of you, you just sit back and let me do everything” you told him before quickly placing a kiss on his lips before reattaching your mouth to Max’s throbbing dick and bringing your hand to the part of it that you couldn’t fit in your mouth. Max felt lightheaded; it’s not like you hadn’t given him a blowjob before, but never like this. He couldn’t ever remember being this turned on before. He had never even considered letting you take control, letting you take care of him so intently before; but now that he was experiencing it – he kicked himself for waiting so long. 
The sounds coming from your boyfriend were music to your ears and only encouraged you to make him feel better and better. You could feel yourself getting wetter, completely desperate to feel him inside of you; but today was about Max, you’d happily wait longer for your own pleasure to take care of him. You began taking him deeper and deeper into your throat, earning more moans from Max. You had never heard him be so vocal before. Things got even better for him when you hallowed your cheeks and brought your hand up to his balls, massaging them in your hands as you worked his dick in your mouth.   When his tip hit the very back of your throat and you gagged around him, he was so loud you were just slightly concerned that whoever was in the room next door would be up for a rude awakening.  
“Oh, fuck baby, oh my god. I’m so close” Max just about managed to get out between moans, promoting you to once again let go of his dick. For a second Max looked at you with puppy dog eyes, silently begging you to take him back in your mouth. But as soon as you stood up and very slowly pulled your pajama shorts down, he realized that there were better things to come.  
“Do you want me to ride you, Maxie?” you asked him breathlessly earning another groan from the man lying on the bed. 
“Fuck, yes. Please please ride me I need to be inside of you more than anything” Max’s voice was weak; it was becoming all too much for him. And when you finally rid yourself of your pajama top, Max started to see stars. Your tits were his weakness, and you knew that all too well. All he wanted was to take them in his mouth, to suck and bite on your nipples. So, when you straddled him once again, that's exactly what he did. You thought about stopping him again, reminding him that tonight was about him and his pleasure; but when you caught sight of his eyes – usually so bright and sparkling. Now they were so dark, so filled with lust and desperation, you didn’t have the heart to deprive him of one of his favorite things to do.  
You leant down to kiss him again, and the taste of his own precum on your tongue made him groan feverishly against your lips. Unable to wait anymore, you finally lowered yourself onto his dick. Now it was your turn to let out a string of moans and profanity. The way that he stretched you out was a feeling that you could never grow old of. After a beat to get used to having him inside of you, you began to bounce on top of him, pumping his dick in and out of your tight desperate pussy.  
“Oh my god Maxie you feel so good, your huge dick sends me so crazy” You moan out, completely cock drunk. “You fuck me so good, god nobody makes me feel like you can” Your praise made Max moan louder than ever and then he simply couldn’t help himself anymore; he brought his hands up to your hips and began thrusting hard into you. You wanted to tell him to stop, to tell him to let you take care of him – but when he rammed his cock into g-spot you physically couldn’t ask him to stop doing something that felt so good.  
“I love you so much Y/N baby” Max croaked out, bringing his mouth back to your tits and his hand down to your clit. Him touching you for the first time tonight meant it was now time for you to see stars. His expert hands rubbing against your clit brought you closer and closer to release and you could tell from the way that Max’s thrusts became deeper and harder that he wasn’t far behind you. 
Wanting to finish what you had started; you placed your hands on his chest – signaling him to stop for a second. Max did so very reluctantly, but when you started to bounce on his dick again his eyes rolled back into his head. After each bounce you grinded yourself down on him, desperate to get him as deep as you possibly could. Your climax was getting closer and closer and soon you felt like you were ready to burst. 
“I’m going to cum on your dick okay baby? You just make me feel so good I can’t help myself.” you told the man beneath you breathlessly, prompting Max to resume rubbing circles into your clit. 
“Please do. Please cum all over my cock I need that so much” Max croaked out and with that you fell over the edge. A wave of pleasure washed over you and you screamed out for Max. It felt so good you thought you were going to pass out, completely taken over by the pleasure that Max’s hard dick had given you. For a few moments, you simply had to still yourself to let yourself recover. 
Once you had ridden out the last of your orgasm, you were ready to go again; ready to make Max feel as good as you possibly could. You began grinding down onto him, squeezing yourself against him. After feeling you cumming all over him, Max knew he wouldn’t need long before he was right behind you.  
“Fuck Y/N I’m really close, get off and I’ll finish in your mouth” Max just about got out between moans. When you didn’t get off and instead began bouncing faster and harder, Max really thought he might just die.  
“Cum inside of me Maxie please, I need your cum fucked so deep inside me”  
“Fuck really?” 
“Yeah, i need it so bad.” 
“Oh my god Y/N, you’ll be the fucking death of me” 
The second those words left his mouth, he fell apart. A string of profanity left his lips, and you could feel his dick pulse inside of you as he painted the insides of you white with his cum. Max couldn’t believe how good it felt, sex with you was always great but that was on another level, he couldn’t remember ever feeling that good before. 
“I love you so much Y/N” 
He gently slipped himself out of you and you collapsed next to him on the bed. Exhausted wasn’t the word for how tired you felt after that. And apparently that was true for Max as well as in the time that it took you to waddle to the toilet to clean yourself up, he had managed to fall asleep. You couldn’t blame him of course; even before that it had been a very long tiering day for him. So, as quietly as you could, you got ready for bed and slipped yourself into bed next to him.  
Looking at the very peaceful sleeping man next to you, you couldn’t help but snuggle down close to him. Placing a kiss on his temple before assuming the big spoon position that you know he loves so much from you. Your movement causing him to ever so slightly stir awake. 
“You’re the best thing that ever happened to me” he spoke so softly you almost missed it before falling right back into a very peaceful sleep. You couldn’t help but feel so lucky to have a man like him cuddled close to you. 
“Sleep well Maxie, I love you more than anything.” 
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wooahaes · 2 months
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svt - whatever you say, beautiful
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pairing: non-idol!svt x gn!reader
prompt: i'm not arguing with a man who has big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful.
warnings: established relationship aus. food and alcohol mentions. jeonghan and reader lovingly calling each other 'ugly' like an old married couple. 96z roommates au (jun). soonyoung's terrible mayo-ketchup concoction (jun). reader gets called beautiful back (jun, soonyoung). friends -> lovers (jun, soonyoung, jihoon). bickering as a love language (minghao, seungkwan). sexual implications from a third party (chan telling seungkwan to let him know if he needs to put headphones on or leave).
daisy's notes: i wrote that vernon drabble and gave myself brainrot. also on jeonghan's: ik there's cultures that do this lol but for those unaware: pls don't take it as a serious thing haha its meant to be akin to calling someone silly or goofy. i just think it gives old married couple energy to be like 'you're a nuisance but you're my nuisance and i adore you wholeheartedly.' like seungkwan tells them: just tie the knot if they want to, because they already act like they've been married for seventy years.
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choi seungcheol
seungcheol was sprawled out in your bed, blanket securely tucked around him while he scrolled through his phone. sleepovers, at this stage in your relationship, weren't exactly uncommon... but the giddiness still hadn't worn off. the two of you didn't intend on moving in together for at least another year, both of you enjoying living on your own for right now after so, so much time of living with other people. still... that would never stop you from enjoying the sight of your beloved in your bed, ready for sleep, and winding down by checking his social media for the second or third time today.
until you saw him stop. he furrowed his brow, that handsome face completely perplexed. and you fought back a grin, because you knew exactly what was confusing him.
today the two of you decided to publicly reveal your relationship to more than just immediate family and very very close friends. seungcheol had been thrilled over it: he'd always been wanting to show you off since you started dating. but when you asked for a little time, he didn't fight: he just met you where you were. and now that everyone knows...
"what is this?"
he turned his phone to face you, giving you full view of the caption you lovingly wrote out. it sat underneath a collection of pictures, some taken by you, others by him, and one taken by one of his close friends in preparation of this special day... and, of course, it was a silly little joke.
i'm not arguing with my man and his big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful. ❤️
you snickered, crawling into bed next to him. "what's wrong with it?"
"nothing!" but he was pouting, and you knew what was coming next. "did you see my post?" he was already moving to pull it up, as though you hadn't read and re-read it a million times while he was in the shower.
so you decided to torment him. just a little bit. "you don't like it...?" you frowned, putting on your best 'kicked puppy' look.
"i do like it!" he was quick to try and assuage your worries. he turned over so that he could face you. "but... when we decided to tell everyone, i thought you wouldn't post a meme as the caption."
"so you hate it." you crossed your arms, pouting as hard as you could muster.
"i don't hate it! i didn't say--i didn't mean that, i just--" he looked up, watching you for longer than a few seconds. then he snorted, hand resting over his heart for a minute. "you're going to be the death of me."
with a snort, you crawled closer to him, all but dragging him up so that you could kiss him. "you know you're the normal one here."
he giggled, capturing your lips in another quick peck. "maybe i am," he said. "... i do like it, though. just warn me next time."
yoon jeonghan
joshua (hannie's coworker): [IMAGE.JPEG]
joshua (hannie's coworker): can you come get him he's bickering with seungkwan rn
joshua (hannie's coworker): (it's mostly seungkwan bickering but jeonghan is actually fighting back a little)
joshua (hannie's coworker): (it's literally over who's paying for chan's birthday dinner. cheol literally picked up the check half an hour ago right after they started.)
you: omw. also idk how seungkwan does it. i'm not arguing with a man with big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful.
the moment you pulled up outside the restaurant, you should have known exactly why jeonghan was grinning at you. he waved from the sidewalk, turning back to his friends to talk just a bit longer. he didn't move, which... on most days, you wouldn't care. but it was late, and you had work in the morning, and (according to joshua) they just spent the past few hours just chatting after their meal. five minutes melted into ten, and then into twenty...
and so you rolled down your window, yelling out a 'happy birthday!' to chan that finally got jeonghan's attention. another grin, and that was enough to tell you that he'd been waiting for that. he wouldn't do it for everyone, but chan? you knew their friendship was different. he hugged the guy one last time, and then made his way over to the car, climbing into the passenger seat. with a final wave to his friends, you pulled back onto the road, and started the journey home.
"so... you really think my eyes are beautiful?"
ah. that was the other reason the fucker wouldn't stop grinning at you. of course it couldn't just be one thing with jeonghan.
"you think i'm beautiful?" he watched you with this knowing smile, as though the two of you hadn't been dating for years now. as though you hadn't drunkenly confessed it before. "i'm starting to think you actually like me."
"you're just now realizing that?" you flicked on your blinker, coasting into the turn lane. "do you think i'd be living with you if i didn't?"
"you never call me beautiful to my face anymore, you know," he said, reaching for your bottle of water. without a care, he uncapped it, taking a long sip from it. "you just call me 'ugly' whenever you call me something."
that was far from true, to be fair: he was your love, your baby, your honey... and he was 'ugly' when you were particularly affectionate. "i have to keep you humble, ugly. you already know how beautiful you are."
his eyes twinkled a little as he looked at you, that fond smile telling you all you needed to know. "i know, ugly." he'd never been afraid to throw the word back at you, and you hoped that the tiny thrill it brought you never died.
no wonder seungkwan once said the two of you should go ahead and tie the knot. "you already act like it," he'd said, side-eyeing the two of you before taking a long sip of whatever coffee-flavor-of-the-day he'd picked out.
he reached over, prodding your cheek. when you glanced over, just enough to let him know you were listening, he just leaned against the center console with this handsome smile he reserved for you. "i love you."
and maybe he was a little drunk. just a little. but you let him have this one. "i love you, too, handsome."
joshua hong
"am i not worth the effort?" joshua couldn't even fight his playful grin now, his phone in his hand. "you couldn't even come up with an original post for our anniversary?"
with a roll of your eyes, you glanced back over his own post for a moment, pausing your search for movie snacks. he'd written out this long, sappy love letter to you about how he wanted to spend the rest of his life alongside you. it was sweet, and a little silly when he recounted the embarrassing story of how the two of you realized your feelings for one another (all it took was one spilled milkshake, courtesy of jeonghan), but overall a very public display of his adoration toward you. the picture-perfect, romance novel act of love from your boyfriend.
in other words: he was hamming it up so that people would gush over how he was the most adoring boyfriend, and how lucky you two were to have one another based on everything he said. in reality, he was literally eating your snacks right now. and later that night, he'd put his cold feet on you and then laugh over it.
"uh-huh." you continued searching through the cabinets after pocketing your phone. "should i have told everyone about how you somehow always manage to eat the last poptart in the box, even though you straight up told me that you keep count just so you can tease me over it?" you tossed an empty box into the bin, making a mental note to add them to the list. "or the time you literally ate all of my fries when we were on that road trip?"
"you're never gonna let me live that one down, are you?"
"didn't mention how god awful your workout clothes stink, either." you grimaced at the memory alone. "seriously, dude, how fucking hard do you go?"
"i forgot to wash them twice!" he turned around on the couch. "all because i said i thought it was cute when you mumble in your sleep and keep me up all night--"
"listen. i'm just doing damage control for you, hong," you pulled down a bag of chips, carefully rolled and clipped to keep them fresh. making your way back over, you continued, "really, you should be hiring me. i called you beautiful and mentioned those big brown bambi eyes." you threw yourself down next to him, bag crinkling as you unrolled it. you held up the first chip, an offering to him that he leaned over to take. "i think i deserve payment for it all."
but he grinned at you, settling back in. "i'll think about it. i'll get the big box of poptarts next time," he poked your side, just hard enough to get you to move off of his blanket, and then drew you right back in once he could throw it over you. "and i'll let you pick the first movie."
with a roll of your eyes, you reached for the controller. "what a gentleman."
wen junhui
your life was truly, sincerely, over. this was it. this was the big one. the big fuck-up that would kill you from embarrassment alone. if you were a sim in the sims 4, little sim jihoon would be sobbing over your body right now as the grim reaper came to take you away.
instead, he was just stiffling his laughter, patting the top of your head as you bury your face in a pillow. "it's not that bad."
"it's terrible! i was only posting that picture because we looked good!" you jerked up, staring at him. "and--and jun liked it! did he not read the caption?!"
"oh, he read it," soonyoung was doing something unholy in the kitchen, from the sounds of the ketchup bottle being opened alongside the smell of mayo. not another thing to ruin your day. "he's on his way home, by the way."
yep, this was how you died. surrounded by two of your roommates and being confronted by the guy you've had feelings for for... fuck, how long had you known him? since college? he'd been there for you after a particularly nasty breakup not long after the two of you met, and that was when your stupid heart fell for him. you'd always pushed back against it: it wasn't the right time. he was dating someone at one point. he wouldn't like you back. but the more the two of you started spending time alone, the deeper you fell.
"have you thought about just telling him how you feel?" jihoon asked, stealing your pillow and hugging it against his chest. "i know it's scary, but i don't think it'd go badly."
soonyoung looked over, condiments smeared on the outsides of his mouth as he chewed. he swallowed, wiping his face with a paper towel as he spoke, "even if he didn't like you, he'd let you down easily."
"soonyoung!" jihoon turned to face him. you rarely saw jihoon mad, but this had to be the closest.
soonyoung realized what he said. and immediately took off, shutting himself back into his room as jihoon raced to encounter him first. while he tried to jostle the door open, the yelling faded into background noise.
jun... what?
the apartment door opened after a while, wonwoo standing there with jun right behind him. without hesitating, you hopped up off of the couch, immediately excusing yourself as you went to hide in your own room. jun called after you, and you just shut the door behind you, face in your hands. this could not be happening. this wasn't happening. if soonyoung was telling the truth, and, because jihoon yelled at him, he definitely was... what now?
jun knocked on your door. everything outside of your room was silent now. if jihoon was chewing out soonyoung, you'd probably hear some of it. yet... quiet. peaceful quiet that you weren't exactly used to with this bunch.
"can we talk?" he spoke up after a moment. "i don't exactly get the caption, but... do you really think i have beautiful eyes?"
oh. he had no idea it was some meme you'd seen online that always reminded you of him. yet the gentle way he'd asked made your heart flutter all the same. you said nothing, just sitting with your back against the door.
"it's okay if you do." you could hear the sound of him moving, and slowly, it sounded as though he was sitting, too. "i... i think you have pretty eyes, too." was it possible to hear his uneasy smile in the way his voice shook just a little, his nerves so, so evident? "the others left, by the way. so we could talk. wonwoo was confused, but jihoon dragged both him and soonyoung out for a walk."
that answered one question, at least. again, you just said nothing, curling up as tight as you could. your heart hammered in your ears, and you shut your eyes. was this really happening?
"i've liked you for a long time," he said, voice just as gentle as it was before. like he, too, was scared of what this all meant. the two of you were crossing a line you never thought you'd even tread near, let alone vault over. "it's okay if you don't feel the exact same way. but... you're sweet. and i--"
you bit the bullet. you got up, opening your door to see jun turning to face you. he'd been sitting there, back against the door, talking to the air while you'd been too scared to face him. he stood up as quickly as he could, watching you carefully.
he was the one who spoke first. "hi."
"hi." you said it back, heart racing. "i think you're beautiful."
and oh-so-shyly he smiled back at you. "i... think you're beautiful, too."
maybe this would be the start of something good.
kwon soonyoung
with your eyes screwed shut, you knew that seungcheol was going to give you so, so much shit about this when you told him. knowing your luck, it was going to go horribly, and you'd probably die right here and it'd be your ghost haunting seungcheol... but that was something you could deal with.
yet the moment 'tiger kwon' popped up on your phone, you knew you couldn't avoid this forever. you'd pester soonyoung later for changing his name in your phone again. for now, you just answered the request for a video call, and you were met with those pretty eyes staring at you in the low light.
"hi." he giggled. "i don't think that text was meant for me."
astute observation, considering the first three messages before you gushed about his eyes and called him beautiful were "FUCK" and "CHEOL I CAN'T DO THIS" and then a picture of the two of you from when you grabbed dinner together earlier. you expressed your romantic frustrations in the only way you knew how: a screenshot you'd seen of someone's tweet. the same thing you'd said to seungcheol many, many times before.
"so what does that even mean?" he's grinning, and you knew that it's half-genuine. he was smart enough to get the gist of it (to put it simply: you were, as you'd been told, down bad) but you weren't sure how often soonyoung saw memes like this. he was watching your face, those cute eyes shining with the light from his phone screen, and he rolled onto his stomach. "when did you get worse at technology than me?"
was this what confessing to soonyoung would bring? a lifetime of having a cute man tease you oh-so-lovingly?
"are you alive?"
you managed to squeak out a deeply embarrassed, "yep."
he just giggled, head resting on his hand. "do you text seungcheol like that a lot?" he waited. and when you didn't answer, too embarrassed to speak, he continued on, "i think he and jihoon trade war stories, then. jihoon..." his cheeks were dusted red. "jihoon hears a lot about you."
holy fuck. your stomach was doing flips. "soonyoung?"
"this is embarrassing, isn't it?" he chuckled, eyes focusing on his screen again. "jihoon said it's some sort of joke. vernon showed it to him once. but... i think you're beautiful, too."
truly, this man would be the death of you if he kept smiling at you like that. like you were his world already, eyes shiny and cheeks red.
"i..." your mouth felt dry. "can we... maybe... a date?" something about seeing his face right now made your mind go blank.
he chuckled. "i'm free this weekend," he said, still smiling. "we'll talk tomorrow morning. okay?"
"okay." you licked your lips, just trying to come down from this high. "goodnight."
the moment he ended the call, you were texting seungcheol: LET'S FUCKING GO GOT A DATE W SOONYOUNG!!!
and in return, he sent you three words: about fucking time.
jeon wonwoo
people always warned you about marrying the love of your life. the honeymoon period was something strong, that tinted your days with sugary kisses and honeyed skies until it all dissolved when reality washed back over the two of you. yet you had been married to wonwoo for two years now, and that sweetness never seemed to melt from your lives. the honeymoon period was over, yes, but the work you put into your relationship kept things lively. arguments came and went, and you always found yourself enamored with the man who guarded your heart in the same way you guarded his.
that was why anniversaries were special. not because they were another milestone, another celebration of a year the two of you made together... but an excuse to gush about wonwoo. you kept it to two days in particular: your wedding anniversary, and his birthday, both dates set months apart. wonwoo was different than you, however: he didn't want to broadcast his feelings for the world to see. he reserved all the sweet things for words he physically wrote down for you to read, or as things he said to you outright when he was sappy enough.
and you? well... he knew your true feelings would never be one-hundred-percent out there. those were reserved for him. but if you wanted to gush about how much you loved him, then who was he to stop you?
he'd been scrolling through his instagram feed that night while brushing his teeth, only to snort when he finished reading your post. the duality of your relationship was beautiful: he'd posted a short, sweet caption for you underneath a lovely quote from a book the two of you loved. and you had gushed... and finished it off with a meme that you sent to him the moment you saw it. i'm not arguing with a man who has big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful. the same words you teased him with when you were in a particularly playful mood.
so when he returned to you, he just crawled into bed, pressing kisses against your face. his affectionate moods would always take you by surprise, and he was glad for that. it spiced up the relationship just a little that he was still able to surprise you after all this time.
"you're so cute," he curled up with you, pulling you into his arms. "happy anniversary. i love you."
you snorted a little. "i see you've noticed."
"should i have read it sooner?"
you waved him off, "no, no... i'm glad you didn't see it until now. check the comments when you get the chance. a bunch of your friends loved it."
he was sure that they did. they all seemed to adore the duality of the two of you more than he did. the quiet, studious wonwoo and his silly love who made him laugh more than anyone else. but he knew as well as you did: no one would love your dynamic more than the two of you did.
he was your home, just as you had become his.
lee jihoon
all jihoon wanted to do was ask if you wanted to go to dinner. he'd suggested a place, you'd suggested another, and he mentioned not wanting that kind of cuisine... only for the words to appear on his phone within the next few minutes: i'm not arguing with a man who has big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful.
... beautiful?
"soonyoung!" he yelled out for one of his housemates. if he wasn't here, then seungcheol would come in. yet he heard the sound of footsteps quickly approaching, soonyoung sliding against the wooden floor a little as he looked in. "read this."
so he did. he read it once, and then again before looking up. "... they're flirting with you, i think."
"that's weird, right?" jihoon looked up. "they don't like me back."
"how do you know that?" soonyoung grinned, leaning against the empty doorframe. "you don't know that. they're hitting on you. shoot your shot."
"i'm not going to--"
his phone started to ring. he looked down, wide-eyed, as he realized you started to call him. before he could debate denying the call and pretending the text never came, soonyoung bolted forward, answering it before immediately leaving his room. the little shit--
"oh my god," you said, "i'm so, so fucking sorry--mingyu's here and i was trying to look up other places to eat on my laptop, and he had the bright idea to text you that shit. i left my phone alone for one minute, and this is what happened--"
"why would he text me that?" jihoon could feel his heart begin to hammer in his chest. why would mingyu tease him like that? mingyu knew that you were off limits when it came to this kind of thing. unless...
"i--well, i--" you stammered, all sentences melting in your mouth before you finally let out a long sigh. in the background, he could hear mingyu begin to laugh. "shut up!" and then the sound of a door slamming behind you. "fucking--" you let out a sigh. "sorry. made the mistake of putting you on speaker."
"that's okay." jihoon leaned against the back of the chair. "but my question...?"
with another sigh, he could hear you settle into something. a chair, a couch--he wasn't sure. "this isn't how i wanted this to go... but... i like you. and i guess mingyu's had enough of hearing about it. it's okay if you don't feel the same, but... that's all."
quiet. neither of you moved to speak, to pitch another restaurant to go to. jihoon opened a new tab on his browser, already typing in a new search for the best places to take a first date.
"jihoon?"
no point in not taking the leap now. you'd already taken the first step: he could do the next one. "can... can tonight be our first date, then? instead of us getting dinner as friends."
quiet.
"jihoon..." your voice was soft. "i'd love that."
note to self: thank mingyu.
xu minghao
"what does this mean?" minghao looked up from his phone, where you could clearly see the post you'd made earlier. it was a combination of candids and the actual pretty pictures you'd taken of him, all captioned with a joke. he began typing something out, "we bickered about toast this morning."
"oh my god, hao--"
then your phone buzzed. you looked down, and there it was: minghao calling you out on your own damn post. when you looked up from your phone, he just had that stupid smug grin on his face. he crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair as he waited for you to defend yourself.
"it's a joke. it's a meme. maybe you should learn them, old man."
he rolled his eyes. "it's a lie and i'm not standing for it. everyone knows that we argue about everything."
even before the two of you started dating, you'd bicker about the smallest things. none of it was ever serious--the two of you had only fought a handful of times in the entirety of knowing one another--but you remembered the annoyed look you would get sometimes. just go make out already had been what his friends would say. eventually, it turned into mingyu telling minghao to go ahead and give you the marriage papers already. the two of you were in it for life, weren't you?
which, ultimately, turned into you and minghao bickering about that, too. the two of you hadn't even been dating at the time, but you would both be lying if you said that conversation hadn't made the two of you figure out your feelings. you'd retorted that minghao wouldn't get along with your parents like that, leading to him actively calling them to prove that, yes, in fact, he would.
(you would simply never live down both of them going "he isn't your boyfriend? we were waiting for you to be ready to tell us," and the subsequent call where your mother chewed you out for hanging up on her right after.)
"we don't argue about everything."
minghao gave you a pointed look. "strawberry jam."
you pinched the bridge of your nose. "not this shit again. i thought we agreed that butter is--"
... fuck, he was proving his point.
"fine," you said. "we bicker a lot. doesn't mean i can't lie via meme."
he just smiled, happy to have won whatever little argument this almost turned into. "everyone knows this is our love language," he said, head resting in his hand. "but fine. you can lie through your memes."
and thus he put the two of you on equal grounds once again: a truce, in a sense. just like most of your little debates ended in.
kim mingyu
"you know you could just call me pretty if you wanted to."
your face burned at the way mingyu was giggling now. all you did was text him a meme (yes, from the other end of the couch) and wait for his response. he'd read it under his breath before bursting into giggles, so, so enamored with the way that you were. he always had been: mingyu, unlike you, wasn't shy when it came to his affection. he complimented you constantly on anything and everything, whether it be your appearance or the way you rambled to him or the way you clammed up "all cutely embarrassed" (his words, not yours) when you realized just how much you said. you told him once that you weren't the most open about your feelings or the loudest.
and he'd merely kissed your forehead and said that was okay. he was loud enough for the both of you. if loving him quietly meant that you loved him, then that was all that mattered to him.
you whined his name at him, trying to hide your face. you knew that you always would get this doe-eyed, dreamy look on your face whenever he teased you like this. you caught a glimpse of it in a mirror once when you were at a store buying furniture, and swore to yourself you'd never let him catch you like this so obviously ever again.
of course, that was moot because mingyu saw that sappy look on your face and treasured it every time... but for your own sake, you couldn't let him notice.
yet he laughed anyway, crawling over to pull your hands away from your face. "i mean it!" he squished your cheeks, "just call me pretty next time. that's what you wanted to say, right?"
you pushed his hands away from your face, just so that you could speak clearly. "i think you have pretty eyes."
his smile dropped, eyes going wide. and he slowly pulled away, face turning redder by the second as he turned from you. "you can't just say it like that! i wasn't prepared!"
you felt a little bold this time. "whatever you say, beautiful--"
the groan that mingyu let out, fully flustered by you now, only made you feel more confident in teasing him. no wonder his friends loved to pick on him... he was so cute about it.
lee seokmin
the minute you finished saying it, seokmin had burst into giggles. all because you wanted to jokingly flirt with your beloved and see his reaction. he had looked up from his phone, where he'd been idly googling to find dinner options, and then you could see those gears turning before he started laughing.
"really?" he reached over, drawing you into his arms. "so you won't argue with me tonight?" seokmin squished your cheeks to pucker your lips, planting an loud kiss against them. "all because you think i'm beautiful?"
you just fought back a laugh, reaching up to toy with the hair at the base of his neck. "whatever you want, beautiful."
another giggle burst past his lips, and he dropped one hand down, sliding it up your thigh. "do you mean it? or are you just flirting with me?" he gently squeezed your thigh, just a little. "you don't have to flirt with me like that. i'm already yours."
ever the romantic. you drew him in for another quick kiss, soflty laughing against his lips. "gotta keep you here somehow," you teased. "it's hard to compete with you when you're mister perfect."
his nose brushed against your own. "i think you keep up just fine." he paused, drumming his fingers against the outside of your thigh idly. "can i confess something?"
you watched him curiously. "huh?"
"your best friend..." his hand slid up to your hip before he loosely draped his arms around your waist. "when we got together, they messaged me to tell me you talk about my eyes a lot."
oh no. "you know you have pretty eyes--"
"like a baby seal." he giggled. "and something about having puppy dog eyes, too."
ohhh no. of course they'd rat you out. "but am i wrong?"
he just nuzzled his nose against your own for a minute, planting a tiny kiss against the tip of it. "i just like you. you're so silly, it's cute."
with a smile, you just settled against him. "i mean it, though. pick wherever you want, beautiful." his giggles only made you happier. "i'll pay."
boo seungkwan
"chan and i bicker less than we do."
seungkwan wasn't phased by your flirty word or the way you were trying to call him beautiful (my boo-tiful boo, if your silly phone contact was anything to go by). he just looked up from his phone with a flat expression, which... probably meant he saw that post somewhere for himself. the lack of originality probably also got you here.
"okay, fine, that's true," you said, rolling your eyes. "you're still beautiful, though."
"i know that," he said. "but we argue a lot over silly stuff. vernon said he thinks it's a love language."
another roll of your eyes. "seungkwan, we don't argue that much."
"don't we? remember that time the neighbors got concerned because we got a little too heated about the way one of our dramas ended?" he crossed his arms. "i still think the ending was good, but you got angry over the way it tried to incorporate greek myth and--"
"it was incorporating greek tragedy and didn't give it the sad ending!" you threw your hands up in the air. "don't promote it as being based on the myth if you aren't going to have a tragic ending!"
"it didn't have to! it was a retelling! things don't have to adhere strictly to--"
chan's door opened, and he walked out of his room. he looked at the two of you before groaning. "this fight again?"
"we're not arguing!" the two of you said together, turning to face him.
chan just rolled his eyes, making his way over to the kitchen. "sure..." then he took one look at the two of you, shaking his head. "i'm going to see if yeonjun wants to go out. don't do anything until i'm gone or have headphones on."
"we don't--"
"you do. just keep arguing or whatever," he pulled out his phone, walking back to his room.
his door shut. and the two of you just looked at each other. seungkwan rolled his eyes, flopping back down on his end of the couch.
"i hate him," he said offhandedly, no venom behind it. you knew just as well as seungkwan did that if chan was in trouble, seungkwan would be one of the first to run there. "who does he think he is? he always acts as if he knows our relationship better than we do."
you slid over closer to him, and he lifted an arm so that you could cuddle in. "he's a jerk," you said, again, no real malice behind it at all. "you should come live with me."
he rolled his eyes. "you always say that." he turned his face, kissing your temple. "like we don't have plans already."
once his lease was up. but you just looked up at him, smiling a little. "whatever you say, beautiful."
that shy smile told you all you needed to know. keep calling me sweet things, then.
chwe vernon
"uh-huh." he didn't even look up from his phone, scrolling through his youtube history. "did i send you this video?"
you frowned. "you're not even going to say anything?"
"you've used that on me before." he continued to scroll. he looked up for just a moment. "also, i'm thinkin'... maybe we could go get tacos for lunch? haven't been to that place in a while." vernon turned his attention back to his phone. "i'm down for whatever, though."
with a groan, you slumped into the couch, already googling for cheesy pick-up lines. the back-up plan, always, for when you need to tease your boyfriend. "hey, nonny? do you have a map--"
"because you're lost in my eyes," he said without missing a beat. "actually, i'm really craving tacos now. i think we could get an order to-go if you don't feel like going out."
he hated you. this had to explain everything. "do you believe in love at first sight--"
"i might," he moved over so that he was closer to you, pulling your legs into his lap. "so, were you being legit about the not arguing thing? because i might take my chance and order anyway."
with a roll of your eyes, you gave up. you weren't going to win this time around. "get your tacos, beautiful," you reached up, turning his face toward you. "i'll pay."
he snorted, bursting into giggles as he leaned over to kiss you. "you're such a dork."
you just smiled into his kiss. "but you love it."
lee chan
you loved confusing chan so, so much. all he did was ask what you wanted for dinner, and you hit him back with "whatever you want, beautiful. i'm not gonna argue with a man who has big brown eyes." thus began the confused looks as he looked at you, then his phone, unsure of how to respond to that.
"... what?"
"i said we can get whatever you want," you shrugged. "i'm not picky--"
"that's not what you said." he frowned just a little, clearly aware that you were teasing him in some way... but not quite connecting the dots quite yet. "you never call me beautiful," was what he settled on a moment later.
which was true. you often opted to call him handsome, usually with a soft laugh and a smile that showed just how endeared to him you really were. on occasion, you'd call something about him pretty--the way he styled his hair, or the makeup he wore once when mingyu roped him into being a model for him--but beautiful? as much as you thought he was (chan deserved all the complimentary words, in your humble, unbiased opinion), you'd never voiced that opinion to him directly. the closest was the time you told one of your friends that he had beautiful eyes.
he narrowed his eyes at you. "is this a joke?" for a split second, he glanced down at the phone in your hands. "... are you recording?"
"i can't call my man 'beautiful'?" you put on a fake pout, just to tease him further. "you really think i'm cruel enough to make fun of you like that?"
chan, however, knew you. he knew that you were easily swayed into pulling pranks on him. that time he introduced you to jeonghan was enough proof of that--and every subsequent trip with his friends always seemed to result in them picking out his weak spot and turning you against him, just for a simple joke. if it bothered him, he would have said something... but it did leave him fully aware that you were the kind of person to lovingly tease him.
lovingly, he told himself. he knew it was. but sometimes he wondered if you were put on this planet just to mess with him in a way he'd secretly love. if you were going to be the death of him, then at least he'd die loving you.
"okay." he made his way over, pulling up a restaurant. he showed you his screen, and immediately you focused on the fact that this place was far from cheap. "i want to go here."
"channie, we--"
"you just said you weren't going to argue," he smiled at you, leaning against you. "hm?"
with a sigh, you shook your head. "whatever you want, beautiful," you reached up. "i'll just eat ramen for the next few weeks--"
he snorted, leaning over to kiss your cheek. "just book it for our anniversary, then." he paused for a moment, just watching you with a tiny smile. "... do you really think i have beautiful eyes?"
how could you say anything other than 'yes' when he was staring at you with them?
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entitled-fangirl · 4 days
Text
Meek.
Cregan Stark x Baratheon!reader
Summary: Cregan is determined to be a different man for his betrothed than the men in her family.
Warnings: poor treatment of women, sexism, cursing, talks of sex, making out
A/N: Based on TWO asks!!!! Also--- not proofread😯
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....................................................
Everyone knew the absolute torment that house Baratheon put their women through.
They were cruel to them, not caring for anything but their own pleasure. That was well known.
When Cregan was betrothed to Lord Baratheon's second eldest daughter, he wondered how she'd fair under the Northern weather.
Lord Baratheon didn't even bother to see her go, sending her off to the Wolf with just her handmaidens and guards to see her safe to Winterfell.
Cregan stood at the doors, his shoulders back in a display of northern pride. He was beyond grateful to rid the sweet woman from the ungrateful Baratheons.
The moment her horse stepped through the gate, his people were attentive to her, taking her belongings and beginning to carry them into the castle.
She watched them with widened eyes, confused by their kindness. Cregan quickly stepped down the stairs to her, "Welcome, my lady."
Her head snapped to him and looked down at him from her horse. She said nothing in fear of saying the wrong thing.
He reached up and gently pulled the reigns from her hands. The leather slid from her grasp slowly. She dared not to intervene. 
Once he had the reigns in his hand, he pulled on them, walking the horse further into the yard and closer to Winterfell.
She merely let him as she held to the saddle. 
Cregan felt a small smile grow on his face. She was a curious thing. It was too bad she wouldn't voice her thoughts. 
As he looked up at her, he decided then to change that. He would get her to open up one day.
He tied the reigns off and held out his hand to her. "Let me help you." She reminded him of a skittish doe, ready to run at any sign of danger.
Her shaky hand reached out, and she swung her leg over the horse. She stared at him expectantly.
He let go and grabbed her waist, holding her as he slid her down the horse's side and placed her on the ground.
"Thank you, Lord Stark," her soft voice finally spoke.
He swore he'd never heard anything sweeter.
How the Baratheons could bare to mistreat her, he'll never know.
He told the North that he was in no way going to rush the marriage. So she stayed in the Winterfell walls unwed so he could understand her more before becoming one.
He felt like he owed her that. 
She deserved to be known. 
She had become a little more comfortable around him, beginning to slowly speak to him about only the things that were essential to say aloud.
The two walked the grounds together, a routine they had developed over time. 
"I wish you'd speak about things that don't matter," he finally mentioned. He peeked over to her to see her reaction.
Her brows furrowed as she stared in front of her, "I don't understand."
"I didn't mean it in that sense I suppose." He reached up with his free to stroke the hair on his chin in thought of what to say. "I want to know the things that you worry I'll find unimportant. Does that make sense?"
She hesitantly shook her head.
He sighed softly at how to correct his words. Finally, he shrugged. "I want to know you."
"You do," she countered quietly. 
"I don't," he smiles as he brushed hair behind her ear, "but I'd like to."
She sucked in a sharp breath at his touch to her face. The men in her family were far from this gentle. "I assure you there is nothing of interest to me."
"There is, I'm sure. I'll find it."
She nodded, "Whatever you wish, my lord." She began to walk again.
He pulled her back, "Not so quickly." He reached down and pulled both of her hands into his. "Don't say what you wish me to hear. Say what you are thinking."
"Why would I do that?" She asked innocently. 
He cursed under his breath but didn't let her see the way his jaw clenched. "It matters to me. Your thoughts, I mean."
She stared at their intertwined hands, "Even the unpleasant ones?"
"Especially the unpleasant ones."
It was a strange concept for her, but she nodded as her brain began to truly consider what he was asking for. 
He smiled in relief, still holding one hand and beginning to walk again. "Let us start with simple matters. Perhaps… your favorite novel?"
Her head snapped to him, "I don't… I…"
His thumb rubbed over her knuckles, "I know you have one. I've seen the way book pages soak you in like water."
The question had been a sensitive one. She shrugged in a fake nonchalant fashion and kept walking, "I don't have one."
He hummed lowly, a small warning. "Don't lie. Just say what it is."
"I… I don't remember the name of it," she finally admitted. 
He accepted that answer. "I see. What was it about?"
Her big eyes looked up at him, debating what to say. "It was… a fiction."
He smiled, "I see. There can be enjoyment in fictional novels, can't there?" He waited to say what else she would say. Each new piece of herself she revealed to him, he treasured like a precious stone.
"Well… it is the only one I've read, I'm afraid," she smiled weakly, eager to change the subject.
"The only?" He asked in pure shock. "The only one?"
She nodded, keeping in a certain side of herself. "It was left behind. Father has it."
"Ah," he said finally. 
That evening, he wrote to Lord Baratheon, urging him to send her favorite book. He was straight to the point, telling the man he could send the novel to earn Stark's forgiveness for avoiding the wedding.
A few weeks later, a letter arrived addressed to Lord Stark. He almost ripped it out of the maester's hand in concern when he saw the Baratheon sigil in the wax. It was a thick roll, only making his concern spike.
He pulled it open, revealing a few pages that fell from his hand. 
Book pages.
Ripped book pages. 
He picked up one with a shaking hand. He began to see red as he looked back up at the maester. "What is the meaning of this?"
The maester held out his hand, "Allow me to read this for you, my lord."
Cregan handed the letter to him as he began to gather the few book pages that were sent to him.
The maester's face turned white. "He dares to disrespect you."
"Do not tell me these are what I believe them to be," he growled lowly.
"I'm afraid they are."
Cregan's hand slammed the papers onto the desk in pure rage and stormed out of the room.
Cregan swung his sword with a fury. His sparring partner could hardly keep up, but he knew his Lord just needed to get out his anger.
His partner was grateful when Cregan's betrothed interrupted them.
"Cregan?"
Cregan faltered, freezing in place and turning his head to her. "Yes?" He asked with a surprisingly soft voice.
She wrung her hands nervously. "I… Forgive me. I shouldn't have interrupted."
He stood up tall, handing his sword off to his partner and waving him off. "No. Please. Tell me what you need."
She hummed and let out a deep breath. "I've been thinking."
He nodded, wiping the sweat from his forehead. "Aye…"
"I'm ready to marry you."
He sucked in a sharp breath. "What?"
"I- I want to marry you, Cregan."
He saw the absolute nervousness that radiated through her frame to admit that to him.
He stepped to her, "You're sure?"
She nodded. "If you still want me."
He stepped further to her in urgency, "Of course, I do. Never think that I wouldn't."
She stared at him, now unsure of where to go from there.
Cregan smiled. "Shall I set a date for the wedding then?"
Her eyes lit up. "Would you?"
"I would. And I shall. We shall have it two weeks before Winter strikes. I will leave for the Wall not long after. Would that suffice?"
She looked down at her hands. 
"What?" He tilted his head down, hoping to get her to look at him. "Did you wish for after winter? That could be quite a while."
She had worked herself up just to admit wanting to marry him. How could he expect her to do more?
"Talk to me, pretty girl."
She'd never been called that before. It made something inside of her stir. 
"It's so far," she whispered.
He felt a chill down his spine at her small confession. He gulped as the anger left him completely. "Sooner then?"
"Sooner."
He nodded, biting his lower lip in deep thought. "Aye. Soon then."
A bright smile pulled at her lips. "Thank you, Cregan."
He grinned back. "Of course. Now, go on," he tutted playfully, "Your betrothed must finish his spar."
Red came to her cheeks, "Right. Right, of course. Excuse me, Lord Stark-"
"-Cregan," he quickly corrected.
"Cregan."
He watched her leave. There was a slight skip to her step now that he hadn't noticed about her before. 
Perhaps she was finding happiness in Winterfell.
The wedding was a large northern celebration. The bannermen and families came  from miles around to witness their Warden's wedding.
Everyone was too kind. It was beginning to worry her.
"Quite the feast, I'd say," Cregan smiled at her as the two sat at the high table. 
Her hands immediately reached for her chalice of wine.
And she didn't stop for the entire night.
"Let us retire," he suggested when she tried to refill her cup again. His hand reached out and gently placed it over hers. "It is getting late. And before you fret, the bedding ceremony will not happen. It is only you and I."
Her eyes softened in surprise, not expecting him to say that. "One more glass for courage?" She slurred slightly.
His brows ticked down for only a second before he composed himself. "Courage isn't needed for this. Are you truly this nervous?"
"I'm perfectly content," she huffed. 
The crease between his brows returned. That was uncharacteristic of her to speak in frustration. Had the wine affected her? "Then let us go, hmm?"
She nodded, setting her cup down. "Very well."
He stood, offering his hand out to her. She took it and stood, trying to hide the slight falter in her first step. She moved her hand up to his bicep, letting him lead her from the banquet hall.
Entering their chambers, she sat on the bed. "Will you have me on my back or shall you take me from behind?" She asked bluntly, no hint of embarrassment or hesitation to her.
Cregan hand on the doorknob faltered. He locked the door and turned to her with shock on his face, "What was that?"
"Which way do you fuck, Lord Stark?" She asked in the same tone.
He shook his head with an amused chuckle. He stepped to her, reaching down and pushing her chin up to look at him. "I will not be fucking you tonight." He watched her posture change, a relaxation coming to her. "Why would you ask something so crude? It's unlike you."
"You wanted me to speak my mind, and I have," She stated in frustration. 
"You certainly have," he commented. "But I have a feeling that the wine is twisting your words. Tell me why you indulged in so much wine tonight."
She shrugged, "Why do you care?"
He gently pulled her chin back up, "I care about you."
"There it is." Her nose twitched. "I don't know what to do when you say things like that."
He stood straight, "You didn't answer the question."
"Fine!" She stood up and stepped around him, "I drank so much because I have never known a man to be as kind as you and it frightens me."
"Frightens you? How so?" Cregan was beyond confused. He turned to watch her.
She stepped to the fireplace and buried her hands in her hair in frustration. "I've never wanted to speak my mind to anyone until I met you, and now I fear I'll say something I shouldn't and ruin it all. Do you know what that feels like? To know that one wrong word could send you back to…" Her voice faded off. 
"I don't. And neither do you, because regardless of your words, I'm not going to send you back there. You're a Stark. The Baratheons are only a name now- if you want them to be, that is. If you want to truly be a Stark in name and heart." He offered. His calculating eyes watched her closely now, frowning at the tugging of her hair.
"Even after I've indulged myself in wine and ruined our wedding to the point that you refuse to consummate the marriage with me?" She turned to him and only then did he see the glimmer of the tears that sat in her eyes. 
"You did not ruin anything. But I will not sleep with you as long as you are not fully aware of your actions."
"I am aware," she huffed.
"We shall see in the morning." The slightest amused smile come over him. "I promised to take you to bed one way or the other. Perhaps tonight, it is only to sleep and nothing more." He walked to her. "Turn around. Let me undo your laces, stubborn woman."
She did as he asked, pulling her hair over her shoulder. "Will I regret this tomorrow?"
"The marriage or this particular conversation?" He asked. "If it has to be one, I hope it is the latter. I personally enjoy the former."
She hummed, pulling her outer dress down once Cregan had untied it enough. Layer by layer, she threw each piece to the cloth chair not far from the fire. 
Cregan's careful hands untied each string they came across. 
Silence filled the room, and she broke it with a small sniffle. Her voice was much softer now, "Do you believe my father didn't want to be here? Is that something you believe?"
Of course, he believed it, but he wouldn't say it. "I'm not sure. Do you, sweet girl?"
She hummed, "I do."
That surprised him. "Ah. Do continue speaking your mind, please. Do not let me stop you."
"He has a particular hatred for women. I'm not sure where it started. When he had a firstborn daughter rather than son, my mother was fearful for the girl. I was second. He married us off without a second thought. Dare I admit to you that he signed me away to you without truly reading the document?"
Cregan placed his hands on her clothed hips and spun her to face him.
No wonder she came here so fearful. She was mistreated from the beginning. He stared into her eyes for a moment, letting the silence settle. He reached up and brushed his fingers on her cheek. "How could a man ever hate you?" He asked with a barely heard voice.
Her heart jolted, "I have never felt love before. Is it supposed to feel this warm?"
Cregan let out a joyful laugh as he ran his hands through her hair. "I want to say yes, but you're near the fire. And the wine is coloring your cheeks. We shall revisit this when you are well. Let us get you to bed."
"Bed? Right." She pulled herself from him and moved to the bed. She tucked herself under the covers.
Cregan's smile stayed. "Are you warm enough for the night?"
"Yes, but… are you not staying?"
He shook his head. "I don't want you to wake in a fright if tonight's details blur in your mind. Waking beside me may be startling for you."
"No! I-" she looked around the room in thought. "I want you to stay. I want that."
His head tilted. "Alright. If you want this. But know that nothing will happen to you while I stay here tonight."
"I can live with that," she admitted as she laid on the bed completely.
Darkness filled the room with Cregan blew out the candles, and the bed dipped down as he laid on it. 
In the morning, she awoke with a groan. The sun was burning her eyes. 
"Ah, you're awake," Cregan's voice commented from across the room.
She sat up and rubbed at her eyes until they were raw, determined to get the feeling to fade. When she did, a headache began to erupt.
"Easy," he chided as he walked to her. He reached to the nightstand and held a cup out to her. "The maester made a tea to help with the pain."
She sipped it gratefully. "I had the strangest dream that I'm fearing is true," she said with a groggy voice.
He watched her with a glimmer in his eyes. His hand reached to her and smoothed her hair down.
She peered up at him. She wondered how someone could be so thoughtful.
"Tell me something," he said as sat down at her side. "If that's alright."
"Anything," she whispered. Her eyes flickered to his lips. 
"Is the warmth still there?" 
He watched her face began to near his. She placed her hand on his leg to help her lean over to him. "I believe I love you," she admitted gently.
He smiled and leaned the rest of the way to her. His lips kissed her softly and slowly. 
Before she could truly react, he pulled away again. The grin on his lips returned, as were his hands in her hair, "I was going to gift this to you yesterday, but I believe today is a better day for it."
"Oh," her shy demeanor returned and she set the cup down.
"Don't fret. You'll adore it. Or… I hope you do."
She watched him get up from the bed, beginning to dig though a drawer in his closet. 
He returned with a book in his hand. "It took some time, but I believe it was worth it."
She reached out and took it, examining the cover. She only stared at it for a moment before her eyes lit up. "Is this-?"
"Your favorite novel? It is." His head tilted back and forth, "Or, at least, I believe it is."
"This isn't the same copy as the one with my Father," she remarked.
"No, it's not. I tried to recover it but was unsuccessful. I hope this copy with be worthy of your happiness."
"Oh, Cregan," she mused. "It's… it is too much. I don't understand."
"It is a wedding gift. Do not think twice about it. You haven't the feignest idea of how far I would go to please you," he admitted.
"I've never had someone do something so selfless on my behalf." She hugged it to her chest, "Tell me how you managed it."
He smiled, content with the way she cherished the book. "I admit that I wrote a letter to your father, asking for the book. I was sent ripped pages in return-"
He faltered at the way her face fell.
"-But," he continued, "I sent the pages off to three well-read men and promised them anything to the man who found the novel it belonged to. It took a while, and I feared I would not have it in time, but alas, one of them found it. And here it is."
"What did he wish for?"
He frowned slightly, "Don't fret over that. Just know that it is all handled accordingly."
She pulled it from her chest to look at it again to guarantee that it was indeed real. "You are the most spectacular man I've met." She looked up at him. "I don't know what I have done to deserve you, but I shall spend my entire life thanking the gods for you."
"It is only a novel, my girl."
"It is much more than a novel."
"Then you'd hate to see what else I'd get you to only see a smile come to your lips."
She leaned over to him again as before, "May I kiss you?"
"Of course," he smiled. 
She grinned and pushed herself into his lap completely, pulling her body as close to his as she could, careful to not hit him with the book still in her hand. 
She finally connected their lips with a heavier intent than they had shared before.
He groaned against her and wrapped his arms around her.
"I'm certain," she panted against his lips, "I love you."
"My girl, I've loved you since the moment you arrived in Winterfell."
She pulled away from him completely. "W… What?"
"Since that day," he said as he brushed his thumb over her cheek. "I've been quite sure that I love you."
"You feel warmth when you are with me?"
"When I see you, I want to keep you beside me. I want to hold and kiss you until you're dizzy. I want to watch you sit and read until you become one with the sofa," he chuckled, "I want to see your joy as much as I can. I want you."
"You're unlike any man I know."
"That's alright. Isn't it?"
She chuckled as full relief flowed from her, as if only now accepting that she was safe here. "What a silly question, my lord."
He tilted his head playfully. "My lord?"
"It was my attempt at a jest," she admitted sheepishly. "Was it a poor one?"
"No," he countered. "I was just not expecting it from my meek wife. Perhaps she is not as meek as I once thought."
She laughed again, "Perhaps. We'll see, won't we?"
He kissed her cheek, "I cannot wait." He spoke in her ear, "But for now, be gone. You have a novel to read, don't you?"
Her eyes lit up and she clambered out of his lap. "I do! Oh, I do!"
Cregan watched the woman run to the cloth chair by the fireplace and sit, pulling her book open in a rush to absorb its words.
He chuckled and stood as he began to dress, "I'll fetch you for dinner. There's breakfast on the table from earlier. I expect you'll be content until then," he teased.
She looked up and nodded, "I will."
"Read closely. I expect to hear a summary at dinner of whatever chapters you consume."
She grinned from ear to ear as he left.
………………………………………………….
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inkskinned · 1 year
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you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.
you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.
he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.
a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.
he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.
you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.
people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.
wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.
also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.
he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."
you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.
"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."
he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.
you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.
is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?
you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.
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ilycosy · 8 months
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❝ YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL ❞ | LUKE CASTELLAN
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pairing : luke castellan x reader (no parent mentioned)
summary — being the partner of luke castellan was a blessing and a curse, mostly a blessing— you had the best swordsman at camp and he was extremely loyal. a blessing really, but everyone always wanted him too. sometimes you forget that he could feel insecure too.
warnings : insecurities (relationship + scar) , petnames (baby, sweetheart, love) , hurt/comfort , luke is standoffish and implied to be mentally ill but reader loves him anyways , mentions of other ppl flirting w luke !!
aノn — i want to smother this man in the biggest kisses ever ... he didn't deserve anything that happened to him & he's innocent !!!! it's never said who readers parent is but they don't reside in hermes cabin :) ,,, also i made the scar worse !!!! i wish it was bigger & more gnarly everyday . enjoy !!!!
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you felt burned by the sun everytime he was around, even with his stoic nature and go with the flow personality— he always seemed to burn so bright when you're around. his palms melted you everytime he pulled you into a kiss, his lips hot and slick with spit from his chewing.
his constant even tone (he'll deny when the sass slips through) never bothered you, in fact you quite enjoyed it whenever he spoke. his raspy voice telling you briefly about his day, or talking about a race him and chris had that day, even when he told you not to worry about him.
other people sure seemed to enjoy him too, boys and girls gathered around him like a moth to a flame. his glow always too bright for others not to be drawn, you always saw it— the way girls would giggle and fawn over him, whenever boys lingered around him during activities.
you never told him how it bothered you, because it wasn't really his fault— he was just too perfect.
which is why it shocked you when you began noticing the way he liked keeping the helmet on even after capture the flag, hiding his face until it was deemed inappropriate. the way he favored resting his scarred side in your neck compared to his other, even though he complained of neck pains the day before.
you can't recall when he began doing these little habits, maybe ever since he got the scar, maybe when a younger camper said it made him look scary. you didn't know, but you knew that it wasn't good for him— the way he allowed himself to ache just to hide it.
luke is a great boyfriend, he recognizes when people want something more from him— he's not afraid to distance himself from others when he notices the flirting. it doesn't make him feel good to have that spotlight when you were so much better than him, in every sense of the word.
he never knew how to tell you that he knew. how he knew that the obnoxious flirting hurt you, or how you always backed away when his friends came over.
he would always come in the morning to pick you up from your cabin, hoping that his searing kisses and warm arms could show you that he's yours— even with a disgusting face.
the scar taking up the side of his face made him curl away in disgust whenever he saw it, he completely avoided bathroom mirrors because of it. he hid away from your soft eyes at any chance he could, fearing that you'd realize just how scary it is to date something like him.
the praises eased in slowly, but surely, he almost felt winded the first time he heard it ("baby get your pretty face over here!" you had said, trying to wave him over to your table. he felt lightheaded and nauseous when he walked over.) he didn't know how to handle it.
whenever he tried to ask why you began getting so verbally affectionate, he was waved off with a small wave and shrug. "can't i compliment my boyfriend?" you had asked him with a teasing tone, he hid away under your shirt the rest of the night while he got teased.
you knew that he was confused, but you didn't really care to explain— he'd just shut down and ignore the problem if you did. and you liked complimenting him, especially when he gets flustered like he does.
calling him pretty made his cheeks go red, and he always seemed more spacey after. calling him handsome always got him smiling and hiding his face. cute? he was looking away and blushing. adorable? he scoffed and smiled. gorgeous, he rolled his eyes and flicked you with red ears.
you hadn't called him beautiful yet, waiting for the perfect moment— you'd think you were planning on proposing with how calculated you were with this.
luke hadn't been sleeping well for a while, mumbling in his sleep about nonsense you couldn't understand. stress had clearly taken its toll, and he's chewing again— his lips raw and almost always bloody from his teeth snagging at the skin.
you snuck into hermes' cabin during the night, hoping that he would be up to sneaking out or even finally getting a full night's rest. your boots made him shoot up, sweaty and eyes wide before he realizes its you.
"what're you doing here, love?" he asks in a hushed tone, not yet a whisper but close. you move closer, gently lacing your hand together with his sweaty one. "wanna sneak out?"
the question was whispered, barely audible even. but it made him stand up all the same, sweatpants and cream colored long-sleeved shirt bunched up at the arms, making him look ethereal.
"are you that needy, sweetheart?" he asks as a joke when you've successfully escaped the cabin without waking people. his eyebrows wiggling slightly, his usual stoic facade melting off him like you were a candle and he was wax.
you rolled your eyes, shaking your head as you told him no. tugging him along the camp grounds until you found the picnic blanket, the basket of food right next to it all neatly set up— it took you a whole week to convince people to help you find this stuff, a demeter kid had to weave the basket.
"ta-da!" you said, doing jazz hands as you showed him the comfortable blanket. he didn't say anything, only smiling wide as he laid down on it— he patiently waited for you to get the food out, not feeling any sort of rush as he allowed himself to relax.
you hand fed him strawberries, flicking his nose every time he tried to stick your fingers in his mouth. you admired him in the moonlight, he always looked the best at night. his radiating self was enough light for you anyways.
your fingertips gently brushed his face while he was eating, chewing a piece of cake when he felt them. your fingers making their way to his big scar, tracing the jagged edges of it along with the smooth, raised middle.
"what're you doing?" he says, his voice tight in his throat as he tried to ignore the building pit of fear in his stomach.
you hummed, caressing his face as you looked at him. his eyes focused on your nose to avoid eye contact, "you're beautiful," you whisper.
"extremely beautiful." and his face goes red, his eyes watery as his chest rises up and down in deep breaths. his hands are shaky and pulling you closer, desperate for you and your touch.
it makes you really wonder, how could he ever feel insecure when you're convinced he could be cursed by aphrodite herself, and you'd still see his face when camp visits the gods?
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Text
I keep rewatching that epilogue scene and, the way Hunter and Omega talk about her joining the Rebellion... You can tell this is not the first time they're having this conversation. And I just can't help but wonder what the previous one(s) must have looked like.
Because something tells me it wasn't peaceful.
I just can't imagine Hunter having any other reaction than an immediate, definitive "absolutely not" the first time he hears about Omega wanting to join the Rebellion. Just like I can't imagine Omega being okay with that reaction.
Were they arguing about it? Were they butting heads and not backing down from their respective points? Because they would. Absolutely, they would.
Did their brothers have conversations with both of them separately? Did Wrecker tell Omega to give Hunter a break because he's old and worried? Did Crosshair convince Hunter that he can't keep a grown woman grounded just because he's scared about her? Did Echo tell him that if this is Omega's calling, he has to let her do her thing?
She tried to sneak off. As if she didn't want to go through this again. As if she thought leaving without a goodbye would be easier on everyone and this way no one can stop her. After all, she made up her mind. She's going. But when she turns the light on and spots Hunter sitting there, she's not even surprised. She nods to herself like of course. Of course he's here.
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This literally sounds like they've been over this before. But this time the conversation is surely more peaceful. They both have the other's perspective in their minds now.
This is my choice and I know it scares you but I need you to understand.
I know I won't change your mind but I don't want you to go, I want you to be safe.
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This must have been said before as well. Maybe in anger. Maybe in pleading. Or desperation. I wouldn't be surprised if Omega got very frustrated with Hunter for treating her like she's still a kid. Nor would I be shocked if Hunter had trouble articulating his point of view in all his worry and panic. But here, it's a confession. It's very vulnerable. It's the truth Hunter doesn't want to hear and gives a reason why.
Omega is a grown woman now. Skilled, capable, brave. Hunter doesn't doubt that. But to him, she's always going to be his little girl no matter how old she is and I am still speechless at the fact that we actually see him not only struggling with it but also admitting to it.
Back on Pabu, after they escaped Tantiss, Hunter told her: "We've all fought enough battles for one lifetime." And now, years later, Omega echoes this back to him. "You've all fought enough." Almost like she's reading Hunter's mind and knows that if he can't stop her, he's going to want to join her.
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The way he wants to reach after her here when she gets up. Like he wants to say wait, no, don't go yet!
But this is her fight, just like she says. She's never been able to sit still, we know that, we've seen that. Just like Echo back in season 2, she can't stand the thought of staying down and doing nothing when there are people out there fighting for freedom. People she can help. She's a skilled pilot now (I can bet she'll become most famous in the Rebellion for her flawless Tech-Turn), she has absorbed everything her brothers have taught her over the years like a sponge and now she wants to use that. After years of living away from the fight, she's finally ready to get back out there and make a difference in the galaxy. Fight for peace because that is her calling.
She's ready, but Hunter is not.
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You can tell it's literally tearing him apart to watch her go. That's his baby, the whole reason he's living the life he has now. He gave his blood, sweat and tears so she could grow up safe and happy and away from the Empire's clutches. And now she's going back right into them, willingly.
But she's all grown up. And he has no choice but to let her go do her thing. So he holds her close and I don't doubt sends out a prayer that she comes back to him safe and in one piece. He closes his eyes and commits the feeling to memory because who knows when will be the next time he gets to do this?
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And it might be destroying him inside but he's so damn proud. And he knows she's got this. She doesn't need her old man to watch her back anymore.
And yet still this old man, with gray in his hair and beard, this old man whose posture is hunched and who is moving slowly and having difficulty standing up because of his accelerated age, is telling his very grown up and very capable daughter that if she needs him, he's going to pick up his blaster, don the armor and join her in the fight.
Because that's what fathers do.
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lxdymoon0357 · 2 months
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Hey I hope you are doing well. Can I ask for a story on yandere Phinéas lapiléon x f reader of the manhwa my in-laws are obbsessed .please
(Oooo, good idea! I like the Lapileon family as well...| Noncon, kidnapping, forced usage of Lapileon blood, drugging, manipulation, usual yandere stuff. )
© Writing belongs to me, Lxdymoon0357. Do not plagiarize, but reblogging, liking and commenting is deeply appreciated.
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Yandere! Phineas Lapileon X Reader HCs
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⋐ Phineas met you through his doctor degree, you both studied together. You were supposed classmates, he often kept you at arms's length, mainly cause he himself is reserved, but also to kind of protect you from his blood, he had no idea if he had a cut anywhere..He does to everyone he meets..
⋐ You and him slowly became friends and becoming friends with him took some time as the Lapileons are always more than distanced people, they barely make friends due to the fear of their blood going out and being revealed, it would put not only them in danger but a lot of others as well.
⋐ He would try to push you away, but after you showed no sign of wanting to do such a thing, he decided to give it a try, but was EXTREMELY careful around you, he never wanted you to be hurt.
⋐ He seeked you out at times when he felt he wouldn't be good enough. Phineas also began thinking of you as his precious little flower, you're so innocent and kind, not knowing what was concealed behind the Lapileon family's perfect image...
⋐ You didn't need to know that, not now atleast. What if you run away, Phineas can't have that now, can he? He would have you completely dependent on him, until he knows you won't leave him, before he kidnaps you.
⋐ He is gonna make sure to use Gin to his full extent, he's a shitty person hitting his kid, hiding her, abusing her ,using their blood for wrong things. What's one more thing of being shitty? He will make sure you have the completely and most perfect stay in his arms since it's gonna be your home from now.
⋐ Will guilt trip you, Islette and Celphi are close to you, they're kids they will tattle tale to Phineas and adults for anything you do. They love you, you're a family now. Worry not, everyone approves; Gloria, Therdeo, Pereshati and others, so you don't have to think about anything.
⋐ Will constantly check himself and other, other than Pereshati, for any single cut that will allow his blood out, is thinking of having Pereshati share some blood to you so you can be immune to their blood like she is, Pereshati is excited for that, you're her sibling-figure even if you don't accept it!
⋐ He is refusing to let anyone other than family be near you, he's thinking of actually moving in the manor instead of being away since it will help him to make sure the whole family is making sure you're with him
⋐ He is SO SO SO paranoid about you, cannot be away from you for even more than an hour, he has to be in you at this point and not only in the sexual way, but also the literal sense, he does want a kid afterall....bu he'll settle for snuggling inside you shirt.
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loosescrewslefty · 9 months
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Screaming, crying and OBSESSING over the way Anya and Demetrius are on opposite sides of the Neurodivergent scale and also far more similar to one another than either one realizes. More than any other character we've seen so far, it feels like these two are Yin and Yang, opposite sides of the same coin.
Demetrius easily absorbs facts, figures, and other information that follows a set pattern. But people confuse and frustrate him, and he deals with that by not dealing with it. Anya has the ability to understand more about strangers she passes on the street than people who see them regularly ever could, but traditional academics can overwhelm her so she is resistant to studying. And yet both of them are othered and seen as abnormal by everyone around them, building a wall between them and their peers that they both find difficult to overcome.
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Anya tries to fit in through masking, pretending as hard as she can to be normal (with limited success) but Demetrius has given up after going so long without anyone helping him better understand others which leads to him disassociating in social situations as a self defense mechanism, to get in and out as quickly and painlessly as possible while telling himself it doesn't matter.
Except it does.
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Demetrius didn't need to ask about Damian's stella. But he did. Because he wants to find some sort of common ground with his brother even as he reassures himself that it doesn't matter and he doesn't care. He doesn't pick up on the fact that this makes Damian feel self conscious, that he's comparing his one stella to Demetrius' six and worried their father will love him less for not being as successful. Demetrius doesn't understand how the subject switched to Donovan at all, and shuts down hard when their father is mentioned. Just like he did when Damian called and asked him to be a bridge between them way back when.
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(Demetrius warning Damian not to get his hopes up about Donovan coming to meet him also conflicts with his internal dialog about how the people around him don't matter and he doesn't need to care about understanding them. If it actually doesn't matter to him, then he wouldn't care if Donovan blew Damian off.)
Circling back to the original thought though, I desperately hope that we're going to get Demetrius and Anya interacting directly with one another at some point in the future because I have a feeling that Anya's blunt, child-like nature will lead to her just directly telling Demetrius the things that are eluding him when he interacts with others, demystifying all the unspoken social cues he's supposed to yet cannot intuit for the first time in his life. And he is going to be in awe of this child for her ability to not only understand others, but translate for him when he cannot grasp whatever it is they are trying and failing to say to him.
Demetrius could appreciate Anya's abilities, rather than being afraid of or disturbed by them. And they could both understand the feeling of not fitting in with the crowd. Of knowing that others regard them with fear and contempt, or want to use the things that make them different for their own purposes and treat them like they are just a tool instead of a person. The potential is there for a very interesting platonic relationship between two kids who have spent their whole lives feeling like their differences alienated them from everyone else in their life, and in Anya's case a fear that the discovery of that difference would lead to her losing the love of everyone important to her in her life.
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bamfkeeper · 2 months
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Imagine a jealous Kurt with me...got it? Minors dni, 18+ under cut.
A pouty, silent tantrum Kurt, but also a Kurt who wants everyone to know you're his and completely goes wild. Two varying reactions but two amazing scenarios because I think he can absolutely be either or.
Warnings: Jealous Kurttt, oral (reader receiving), unprotected sex, random mentions of religion, afab reader, my brief thoughts turned out longer than I thought they would, not editedddd ignore mistakes.
WC: 2.7k
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Imagine Kurt sees one of the male mutants having a conversation with you, it's harmless enough. Nothing inappropriate is being said, you aren't being strange and the mutant seems interested in the topic. That is until he becomes more and more eager to talk to you.
It seems like a daily thing now, maybe you're too shy to tell him off or too naïve to realize he is flirting rather than just being very friendly. But Kurt notices instantly. He knows you wouldn't let this happen if you knew how it was affecting him, but he always tells you to speak to whomever you like, he isn't a jealous guy.
He pouts quietly as he sees the mutant giving you a flower because it 'reminded him of you' or something along those lines. only Kurt should be giving you flowers. Why did he think it was okay?
The blue mutant walked over to you, huffing under his breath. When he reaches you, his posture seems to relax in the closeness of your presence, his tail twitched behind him and instinctively wrapped itself around you. "Was ist das, liebe?" he pointed to the obvious flower you held, his voice soft and barely above a mutter. You just turn and give him a small smile, unaware of his inner turmoil.
"Warren gave me a flower, isn't it pretty?" you reply, giving Kurt a better view of the flower you held. Kurt bit his tongue and gave a small smile, nodding silently. When the other mutant left, you could tell something was dampening his mood. "What is it, baby...you don't seem yourself." you observed how he seemed to have the body language of a scolded child still mad he couldn't have a cookie.
"Nichts." he whispered, his tone having a hint of sharpness to it, not directed at you, but the other mutant who thought they could just come over here and charm you like that. However, you've dated Kurt for long enough to see through his little façade. "Don't give me that, Kurt. What's going on?" you pressed, your eyes scanning his body and taking in every little detail. You could feel his tail tighten around your ankle.
"Are you jealous?" you asked plainly, making him bristle, his tail whipped behind him. "N-Nein! I am not!" he insisted and turned his head slightly, his brow furrowing. His cheeks were tinted and you knew how he was feeling. Kurt had a hard time with himself every now and then, being around other mutants who looked different helped how he saw himself. But every so often, he does wish he wasn't blue and fuzzy and devilish.
"Kurt, precious...there's nothing to worry about. You think I'd ever leave you?" your hand brushed up his cheek, cradling it lovingly. "I love you, I adore you, no one is going to swoop in and take me away. I promise." you cooed. "Especially not Warren of all people." you added with a soft chuckle, trying to humor the situation a bit and ease the tension.
This, however, wasn't good enough for Kurt. He leaned in, his arms wrapped around you and he buried his face in your neck. You held him in return, assuming he just needed a close hug. You could feel his lips press into your neck, so you exposed it a little more to him. You tilted your head, letting out a content hum.
Kurt placed kisses along your neck and held you tighter, his tail wrapped tightly around you. "Kurt," you began, but your voice was lost when he bit a sweet spot on your sensitive flesh and suckled. Your eyes snapped open, the sudden suckling caught you off guard. Your lips art as a soft moan escapes them, you didn't expect this from Kurt at all.
"What are you...doing..." you managed, your fingers tangling into his curls, gently scratching the back of his head. It felt so good, and he kept sucking until it stung. When he pulled back, he groaned and looked at the dark mark he left on you. His golden eyes shooting you a quick glance.
"Du bist mein," he rasped, his lips grazing over your ear when he spoke. The way his voice sounded made you shiver, he sounded needy but he also had a gravelly pit that came out as he spoke. "Everyone will know it now." he pulled back, feeling proud of himself for leaving a dark mark on your neck.
You felt over it and smiled at him, "You were jealous." your voice was playful and teasing, making him pout a little. "That's okay, if it means you get like this, then I don't mind. Just remember what I said, okay?" you reassured and pressed your lips to his cheek.
He's pretty tame for the most part like that. But imagine a more possessive Kurt?? Not so much pouty and subtle. Imagine him pulling you off or teleporting you somewhere private where he could really let loose.
He grabs your hand, watching Warren walk away and he looked down at the flower you had. He felt ill to it, it wasn't the flower's fault, but he didn't like where it came from at all. "Liebe." he muttered, pushing you back onto the bed, his hands hooking into your bottoms and yanking them off in the process. His room was so cozy, he was a cleanly man. He learned to be in the circus, only having a few things that got lost easy, so he was pretty organized.
Your train of thought was interrupted when he crawled over you, his eyes glowing softly in the dark room as he stared down, his gaze raking over your body. He was breathing a little heavier, and you blinked up at him. Before you could speak, you felt his tail snake up your leg, coiling around you and jerking your leg to the side. His hand grabbed your other leg and pulled it so you were spread.
"Was denkt er wer er ist..." he grumbled to himself, "Du gehörst mir, Liebling, niemand sonst." he used his free hand to pull your underwear off, quickly spreading your legs again. With you exposed to him, you had no time to speak when his lips pressed into yours with a possessive need. His usual tender kisses contrasted to this new side of him you hadn't seen before.
"Mein." he growled against you, his tongue quickly slithering into your mouth and staked his claim. When he pulled back, he moved down your body, feeling your chest rise and fall. "Kurt, what's gotten into you..." you asked, almost breathless while he trailed down your body. His lips pressing against your neck, a hot trail left behind while his path lowered further.
He reaches your breasts, pausing long enough to give each nipple a hard suckle and swipe of his tongue. A gasp escapes your lips when you feel him suck on you before he continued his way down to where he wanted. He settled between your legs, staring at you. "I'd like to see him get this far." he muttered, almost bitterly.
His mouth connected to your core, his tongue immediately began lapping at you. His hands gripped your legs tightly, your eyes widened as he began to bury into your pussy like he was a starved man. He lapped and sucked, his tongue pushing inside you and feeling your inner walls.
You were a moaning mess, you tried to form a coherent sentence but found you were unable to. His tail moved from your leg and wrapped around your body, the slow coil making you shiver as goosebumps erupted from your skin. The tip of the spade rounded up between your breasts and played with one of your nipples. He could so expertly move his tail...you felt completely overwhelmed in such a good way.
"Oh my god...Kurt..." you finally managed to spit out something, and he just continued. His tongue pulled out of you, his eyes lifting to make contact with yours.
"Lord will forgive me..." he muttered to himself, his focus now on your clit, swollen and needy. His thumb lifted the skin slightly to expose it more to him, his finger tapping it gently. You whined loudly, each tiny touch sending shoots of pleasure up your spine.
"This is where you need me...isn't it, schatz?" he whispered, "You look like you do. It is swelling quite a bit...isn't it?" he let his tongue cup it before he let his tongue drag over it. When you let out a whine, he pulled back. "I know what you need. I always do, don't I?" he asked, pressing a kiss just above where you wanted him the most.
"Y-yes....please, Kurt..." you muttered between breaths, "I need you there, please," you mentally cursed him, he was doing this on purpose.
"You plead beautifully." he leaned down and he attached his lips to your clit, he began to suckle immediately and didn't bother letting you adjust this time. Your eyes shot open as he latched to it like a suction, his tongue swiping over it as he sucked on your bud.
The pressure from his suckling made you squirm, but his arms held you firmly as he continued to nurse on your clit. You could feel your pussy leaking arousal, getting wetter by the second from his behavior. His saliva trailed down your folds and soaked the sheets under you. He continued his ministrations, feeling you were getting close to your climax.
When you did cum, it felt white hot, and your back arched off the bed as you let out sinful noises. "Yesyesyes, Kurt! Don't stop, ooh fuck!" you spewed naughty words that were like a symphony to his ears. He made you feel that, and it made him swell with pride. He didn't stop, even when your climax was over, your bud became so, so sensitive. You squirmed as he kept himself glued to your clit.
"Ah, baby...please, nngh...fuck, I-I'm sensitive...AH!" you felt his tail tighten around you, and he popped off your clit. He licked his lips, his mouth and chin clearly glossy. That damned grin of his. He still hovered, his fingers spread you open so he could lay a sloppy kiss to your cunt, and he gave one last teasing suckle that made you yelp before he finally left your poor clit alone.
You were a mess, your hair all over the place, your cheeks flushed red and your legs remained spread open. Your chest heaved as you calmed down, now taking deeper breaths as you slowly recovered. "Kurt...wh...what was all that about...you've never been so..."
Before you could finish, you could feel something larger press against you, his swollen cock pulsing and rubbing up and down your folds. He kicked his leg out behind him, shaking off the rest of his suit as he positioned better. "Warren will never get this with you, he can give you as many flowers as he wants."
You whined and looked down, he pushed himself inside you with a single thrust, letting out a grunt as you squeezed his cock. You moaned loudly and gripped the bedsheets, the sudden feeling of being full was overwhelming. He pulled back and thrusted once, twice, then started his rhythm.
His cock thrusted in and out of you at a quick pace, his hips being driven hard into you as he grunted with each one. "Mine, you're mine," he growled against your skin, "Niemand außer mir kann dich haben." he groaned and sat up more, watching how his cock pushed into you.
"You swallow me...look at it. Look how you squeeze me, liebe...you love this, don't you?" he asked in a raspy tone, panting as his hair became a little more messy from the thrusts. "You are so warm, you feel like soft velvet." he praised as his hips jutted in again, his pace set on being hard.
You could feel his head brush that sweet, spongy spot inside that sent waves of hot pleasure through your entire body. You mewled out loudly, your arms clinging to him. "Nngh right there!" you managed through your moans.
"Is that the sweet spot? Right there?" he teased lightly, "Such sweet noises from you, you make me such a sinner, you know that?" he groaned in your ear and thrusted harder, his cock head brushed into that sweet spot every time, caressing it and coating it in his hot precum.
He felt himself grow close to his orgasm, he moved over you more and drove himself farther. His tail lashed behind him as he panted against your neck, his sharp teeth nipping your sensitive skin. He marked your neck up in bites and bruises while your cervix ached from his thrusts.
"Come for me again, I feel you getting closer. You are squeezing me tighter..." he whispered against you, "Does your pretty bud need my attention again?" he nipped your jaw and his thumb traveled down between your legs, lightly rubbing circles on your swollen clit.
You could barely even think. The way he was fogging your mind and making your body react was so intense, you clung onto him and spewed begging and moaning at him. "Please, Kurt, I'm s'close...need more, j-just a little more..." you bit his neck as you felt your eyes prickling with tears, it felt so damn good.
Your orgasm hit you and it felt like you jumped from a plane, it was a feeling of overwhelming adrenaline and ecstasy, you couldn't help but scream against his neck, your pussy gripped him like a vice and he held you even tighter. "That's it, liebling, let it out, come for me," he whispered encouragingly and he gave one more hard thrust, his cock twitched as it kissed your cervix and unloaded into you.
You felt his cum drizzling out, filling you up as his thrusts stopped, you both panted together and he sat up more, letting you go to lay down better on the bed. He gazed down at you, his mouth slightly agape as he panted, but quickly regained his breathing. You looked so beautiful blissed out like this, he wished he could keep this image in his mind forever.
"Was I too rough, liebling?" he asked softly, his brow knit with some worry, and his tail loosened around you. It uncoiled from your body and stroked up and down your leg. You shook your head, still somewhat in a daze and recovering from the orgasm he gave you.
"No...no, you just haven't ever been so...intense?" you tried to find the right word as you tried to regulate your breathing again, but it was clear he really wore you out. He was always so passionate but with a gentle intimacy to it. This time seemed that he was driven by something other than his love for you. You looked at him and smiled, "You were jealous~" you teased, making his tail halt.
"Nein..." he grumbled, crossing his arms. "Is it a crime to show more fire to my lover?" he tried to disguise his jealousy, but you knew better. His cheeks were only slightly blushed, but you could get him to lose it if you chose your words right. Your pussy ached at the thought of a jealous Kurt pounding into you. You love how sweet and sensual he is, but having him fuck you sounded so good right now.
"Did Warren upset you?" you cooed, sitting up and smiling at him. "Did you get jealous because he was talking to me? That he gave me a flower?"
"You are beautiful, liebling...I know you have admirers...but I guess seeing someone like Warren be one of them just made me feel...different." he said softly, "He knows you're mine, why would he give you a flower like that?" he looked back up at you.
"Sounds like you're still a bit jealous." you poked his belly teasingly. "How can I make you feel better?" you asked softly, "You know I'm only interested in you, don't you?"
"Ja, I do...sometimes I just don't feel too good." he shrugged. He felt a little more vulnerable, and the need for you only grew again. His hands held your hips and pushed you back on the bed. "I will make sure everyone here knows you are mine." he said confidently, "You will be screaming for me and we might get a noise complaint, but that is besides the point."
You braced for him again, and felt his lips collide with yours as you started all over again.
You did, in fact, get a noise complaint.
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Thanks for reading.
*BAMF*
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dividers by @/adornedwithlight
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drunkkenobi · 5 months
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Hi bb, ty for the prompt to write my thoughts!
So I can't get on tumblr at work anymore unless I go outside to get good signal on my phone so I have only been privy to what's going on here today from friends on discord. So maybe I'm missing some nuance or the what my mutuals think and I apologize in advance for that but I'm going to speak plainly.
This is the only way Watcher is going to survive.
The view counts have been steady through Mystery Files season 2 but they aren't, like, astronomical. A video with a million views nets a channel between $10,000 - $30,000. Guys. That's nothing for Watcher. They have to pay each of their 25+ employees a salary with insurance and benefits and for everything else their channel requires. Steven said in the video today that a season of Ghost Files costs hundreds of thousands of dollars. I don't think everyone is hearing that part and understanding how much money that is, especially compared to many other YouTubers they watch. I'm not an expert on other YouTubers but I look at the Sims people I watch. They are successful with views in the hundred k range because they are a company of one. Themselves and maybe paying a freelancer to help edit their videos. For one person, the stakes are lower and the potential for profit is higher! Especially for gamers that are filming in their homes. YouTubers like this, making niche content on the cheap, are who is going to make it in YouTube now.
Watcher is none of those things. They have, from day one, wanted to make high quality unscripted content. All of their shows are shows. They aren't just "Ryan and Shane do [thing]" or "Steven eats [whatever]". They are shows, like ones you see on cable TV or any streamer. And shows are not cheap. Unscripted is cheaper, sure, than scripted. But that doesn't mean cheap. Especially not with the sheer production value we've seen on all their shows, in particular Ghost Files (hundreds of thousands of dollars). That is how much something like Ghost Adventures costs, which is on Travel Channel, an actual TV network that puts up all those costs.
So. That's why Watcher has to pivot to survive.
I think it's a great idea, personally. And yes, I am in a position where I can financially afford it no problem, which I know is a privilege! I am very lucky in that regard. And I understand that many people are upset they won't see the boys as easily on YouTube anymore. That is valid! But they have openly said they are totally fine with password sharing and I think that's a great way to cut down on costs for some folks. Also right now there's a great deal on the yearly sub for early subscribers. $40 for a year is cheaper than any streaming service and it doesn't go to anyone other than Watcher.
I understand that people feel hurt and blindsided, but I think Watcher is also feeling this too. They have been so excited about this and being able to make whatever they want without having to worry about sponsors and now they're mostly seeing anger directed their way. Especially at Steven. Steven is not rich. You know who's rich? David Zaslav, a man who is single-handedly ruining Warner Brothers and making himself a billionaire while he's at it. THAT is the kind of person we should be directing our anger at streaming prices and quality of the media landscape at. Not one small business that is just trying to survive so they can continue paying their employees.
And one more thing. I've seen folks saying they'd rather watch more ads than pay and while I get that, that's not going to help Watcher make what they want. YouTube famously demonetizes videos with swears which is why I can't watch a video with DRAG QUEENS without every other line being bleeped and Watcher has been so good about not bleeping their content because they know we would hate it. And YouTube does this because of advertisers. Advertisers only want to appeal to the most broad of audiences so that means not supporting anything slightly left of center. Having to deal with ads sucks from the creator perspective and does not help them in the long run.
Anyway, this is all a bit rambling, but these are my thoughts on WatcherTV. I'm extremely excited to subscribe and make them make more Weird Wonderful World. I hope to see you all there.
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berrymeter · 2 years
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i’m. i feel horrible rn but. i’m so very lucky to have energy as a friend i will say that
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gatitties · 10 months
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Web of love
─Yandere!Jujutsu Kaisen x fem!reader (platonic)
─Summary: forced to abandon your family and being spit out into a world of curses where everyone seems to gravitate towards you
─Warnings: a little angst¿ obsession, toxic behaviors, yandere stuff
Part Two / Part Three / Part Four
The blank pages: Part One / Par Two
ok I had a burst of inspiration and I needed to write also need more platonic yanderes for jjk 😔 (I'll probably write another part because I left out many characters and villains… 😈)
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SOMETIMES you think that you had to do something very terrible in your old life, something unforgivable and unimaginable to be punished right now, sometimes you think that the easiest thing would be to bang your head against the wall until you are stupid enough to have a caregiver and stop worrying about many things.
You just wanted to help your parents with the family business, being a time of high demand in the hostelry sector, taking advantage of your school holidays, you loved your family very much and helping in the business was the least you could do.
But the moment a group of children come in screaming excitedly and running from one side to the other you lost your nerve, yes, they are kids celebrating a birthday, but so much activity, noise and annoyance made a vein swell on your forehead, you were reaching the limit, but at least there were only a couple of hours left to be able to close and surreptitiously remove the last people with brooms.
You swore you were losing years and hair, that the minutes passed slower and slower as if you were stuck in an endless hour.
"I think if you keep squeezing the tray like that you'll break it, honey."
Your mother squeezed your shoulder, you turned to look at her, she was behind the bar, cleaning with a cloth while she glanced at you from time to time, she certainly knew how to detect when you were losing your temper, after all she saw you have many crises nervous before.
"Sorry, you know I can't stand so much movement and annoying noises, it's exhausting."
"Oh, I think you can go home if you want, you've done enough for today miss."
A new voice joined in, your father made way with a couple of plates, he left them on the bar to place his hands on your shoulders and rub circles on them, calming you with his touch, you smiled in agreement, your mood improving as you heard that you can go home once and for all, they wouldn't have much work at this hour.
"Don't forget the jacket love, it's already night and it's cold outside!"
"I know mom, bye, love you two!"
You shouted as you were already walking through the door, you waved to both of them before walking out onto the lonely streets, luckily your house wasn't too far from the family business. Without wasting time you grabbed your faithful life companions, your headphones, connecting them to your phone to listen to music at a ridiculously high volume. You let music be your final destination, if you ever suffer an accident, at least it'll be listen to something you like.
Moving your head slightly to the rhythm of the sound, looking at the ground as your legs moved on their own, knowing the way back by heart, you concentrated on drowning out the thoughts leaving your mind blank, it wasn't very difficult since you barely had enough active neurons at this time to have too deep thoughts.
"Huh?"
Some mist came out of your mouth when you felt something tiny cling to your leg, confused, you looked down with a blank look and an imperturbable face, you saw like a kind of fairy-bug, a strange thing was sticking to your leg, looking at you with eyes of a kicked dog. Oh yeah, you started seeing these kinds of creatures, monsters, whatever they are, a couple of months ago when you decided to walk into a 'witchcraft' shop just because a bracelet seemed cute to you.
When you wanted to question the old woman who sold it to you ─after checking that you hadn't spent too much time on the Internet to be hallucinating─ she was no longer there, as if she had disappeared from the face of the earth, no one seemed to remember her except of you.
You grimaced, holding the little thing carefully, pushing it away from you as if you had just taken unidentified food out of the sink after having washed the dishes, without hesitation you threw it like it was a snot, you didn't even hear the squeal that came from it as it crashed to the ground because you hadn't turned the music down.
You continued your path, ignoring how more of those monsters began to appear, larger ones, with more or less human shapes, you didn't know if you had reached the point of emotional exhaustion that you no longer cared about those things, or you were so desensitized to certain things that you barely changed your expression.
"Help… help please… my son- oh- it burns…"
Your feet stopped suddenly, almost falling face first to the ground as you felt one of those monsters cling to your arm like an old woman crossing the street with a helper, looking at you with tears flowing down her cheeks, murmuring things you wouldn't understand if you weren't able to read lips, her hand went higher and higher, absorbing your body in a kind of wrestling-like lock-hug.
If you could you would pinch the bridge of your nose, you started to struggle with the woman, she started screaming the further you got away from her, you cursed silently when you couldn't get her off. This was it, the only thing that bothered you about seeing strange things was that they clung to you as if you were some kind of helper or salvation, you are not a saint, you are not a savior, you were nobody, but they kept coming to you like bees to pollen.
"Looks like you need some help"
You turned your head slowly, dramatizing the side eye you gave to that familiar voice, you heard by chance because of the song change and the small silence, but you could feel his presence for miles. Your frown deepened as you saw the albino look at you with a smile, oh, not only did you have to deal with these curses on your own, as if that were not enough, being one of the few people capable of perceiving these things certain people became interested in you. Sorcerers, it was funny, you didn't believe in magic until you saw this albino lunatic exorcise a curse in front of your eyes, even though you were somewhat skeptical, you refused to attend his institute, but they kept showing up to persuade.
"No, I can take care of this."
"Aw sure, go ahead then, I want to see how you do it."
This time you didn't listen to shit, but his shit eating smile told you everything you wanted to know, you started to struggle with the cursed woman again, it didn't work until you started talking to her. You found it was easier if you tried to give comforts to the poor cursed souls, and you had to do it reluctantly on these types of occasions, removing your headphones for greater concentration. You were terrible at comforting people, so it was like an uphill climb to get that curse to leave you alone.
"And that was ten minutes, you could have done it in twenty seconds if you knew how to use cursed energy."
"Just get lost, I already said no."
"We are offering you free knowledge, how can you refuse it?"
"Aren't public schools there for that?"
"There are no exorcization courses that I know of."
You rubbed your face desperately, you didn't want to learn sorcery, you didn't want to get in trouble, you didn't want to have to comfort anyone, you wanted your simple life, helping your parents, studying, getting a decent job. What kind of future would guarantee you knowing how to control that cursed energy? Clearly nothing good.
"I'm going to put it another way… you attract cursed energy, until now you have been lucky enough to find desperate souls in search of comfort, but what will happen when something much worse is stalking you? Something that seeks blood, your blood."
"Then I'll die, isn't it obvious?"
You raised your thumb with a sarcastic smile, you were too tired to continue a conversation, unfortunately Gojo's next words resonated in your head like a scratched record.
"What if they were your parents? They will not be safe by your side, as I said you attract bad energies."
A lump formed in your throat, letting a shaky breath escape your lips, he watched in silence as he had managed to hit your weak spot, your family, it was something you wouldn't change for the world, they were people who would die for you without a second thought, and just like them, you would give your life for them, they showered you with love and affection, the least you could do was protect them from your own problems.
As annoying as it was to give Gojo an affirmative answer, you had to swallow your pride for a greater reason, and just a week later you were already making the move. Covered as a kind of “Erasmus”, your parents were happy that you were going to explore and meet friends on your own, you wanted to tell them that you didn't want to go, that they would refuse to allow that decision, but that wasn't the case.
Then began what seemed like torture for you, as if you had fallen into a spider web and the more you struggled, the more you got caught in the webs. It was strange, everyone there seemed to have knowledge about who you were and where you came from while you were completely uninformed, it felt strange to be greeted so warmly by unknown people, inside you it was stressful to receive such a degree of attention, but you kept your expression unfazed.
You were like an extension of Megumi, only less expressive and definitely more stupid, you had no thoughts beyond your lost eyes staring into space, nothing made you flinch, nothing made you laugh, nothing made you have a hint of emotion that wasn't nervousness or tiredness. And yet the three first-year students, your classmates, could hear how you tried to drown out your nightly sobs, longing for your home and your family, how you secretly laughed lightly when you saw something stupid on your phone. Why didn't you want to share your emotions with them? Weren't they good enough for you?
You don't know what you triggered by strictly trying not to get emotionally close to people who from one day to the next could be in a grave, just because you couldn't stand it, just because you couldn't stand giving up more parts of your little heart to have them break later.
Itadori started to stick to you like a sticker, are you going for a walk? He needs to stretch his legs, do you want to laze around? He too! He is new to this world of curses like you, so he thinks it is better that you help each other in the face of complications and training. The first time he saw how a curse clung to you for comfort it almost gave him a seizure, he would never think he would be able to exorcise something so quickly, it worried him how used you were to being 'attacked' like that constantly and it only increased his worry, he needed to keep you safe from this dangerous world, it was a promise.
Megumi felt sorry, unlike him you had a normal and happy family, people to turn to, a little envious, he wasn't going to lie, but he tried to make you as comfortable as possible, maybe a little too paranoid about your well-being now that you were a novice unwilling to learn, he felt like he was your big brother, he wasn't going to take an eye off you even for a second, you could get hurt or worse and he had already experienced the bitter feeling.
Nobara was persistent that you open up to her, after all girls should be close, maybe she got too obsessed with that phrase when she watched suspiciously as Itadori dragged you to do something stupid ─against your will but without the energy of to refuse─ and you weren't going with her to have a snack or shopping, she felt a pang in her heart, what if she's not there and something happens? She doesn't trust anyone to take care of you, everyone is inept in her eyes.
Gojo proclaimed himself your fake father, no matter how hard he tried, he would in no way replace the real one, but if he wanted to play the family game you would let him if that made him happy. His attitude was the one that bothered you the most because it made you look like a helpless person at his side, he made you look like you needed him to take care of you. You accepted being the weakest link, but you could fight your own battles, especially after discovering some of your abilities, but he wouldn't allow it, you're too adorable to let go.
After some tests, missions and training, they discovered that your cursed energy acted like an antenna, attracting all curses that wanted to be forgiven or sought freedom. You were cursed with the 'gift' of forgiving and freeing from torture curses that wanted to cease to exist, and you acted as a peacemaker on some occasions. Luck was definitely not on your side or it was kicking you for having laughed at so many other people's sorrows on the internet, couldn't you punch? Kicks? Do voodoo? Summon shikigami? No, you had to pat and release cursed souls.
You didn't have enough suffocating attention from the sorcerers that you also had to have that from the curses. You were going to look for the old woman who cursed you the day you entered her store in another life and you were going to sacrifice her in the name of barbatos.
"Hey there you were! We're going out to dinner, are you coming?"
Nobara opened your door without knocking, you didn't stop looking at the ceiling while you lay motionless in your bed, you shook your head slowly in denial, you weren't in the mood, you were never in the mood.
"Don't talk nonsense, there is no way you can stay here alone, come on, come on! Gojo will pay for everyone."
Itadori entered immediately, pulling your wrist to drag you, you slid off the bed like a dead body, looking blankly at the boy who was giving you a puppy dog look, it wasn't that that made you accept, but if you didn't accept you would pass more time arguing with them in a useless way. You had learned to accept your destiny, you had learned to stay still in that web, maybe if you manage not to move you can free yourself, just maybe.
"I'm glad you decided to accept! It is good to have bonding time with your classmates and teacher, it encourages communication."
You nodded, looking absentmindedly at your phone, scrolling through the screen without looking at anything in particular but not wanting to have to look at the albino's expression, he knew you were going to accept, he knew you were going to go with them because they wouldn't give you any other option. He put his arm around your shoulders dragging you towards the car while he chattered things that went in one ear and out the other.
"Will you sit next to me?"
" No way, she will sit with me!"
And the tug of war began between Itadori and Nobara over who you would sit next to, too stubborn to 'share' if you sat in the middle, they would prefer to be the only ones next to you, Megumi on the other hand was the smartest when entering the first, if he sat in the middle he would assure him that you would sit next to him, however, absorbed in the discussion, they did not notice how you moved towards the passenger seat, end of the discussion and the headache, now you just had to rack your brain thinking about how to solve the fight next to who you would sit at while eating without giving anyone the benefit.
Sometimes you think that you had to do something very terrible in your old life, something unforgivable and unimaginable to be punished right now, sometimes you think that the easiest thing would be to bang your head against the wall until you are stupid enough to have a caregiver and stop worrying about many things, now you had four caregivers but no concussion, for now.
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sorrelchestnut · 1 year
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I've seen a fair number of posts both here and on reddit that question why Tav (or the Dark Urge) would end up as a group leader for any other reason that "game mechanics say so." There's the requisite "okay, well if you play a high charisma character I guess it makes sense," or on the other end of the spectrum, "if you're playing Durge and murder someone right off the bat everyone would be too scared to tell you no." And I get where people are going with this! I really do. But it also fundamentally misunderstands a facet of human nature, which is that the vast majority of people do not actually want to be in charge, because that means being held responsible for the outcome. Accordingly, most people will dither when a group consensus is needed: have none of you ever tried to get a group of friends to agree where to go for dinner? Yeah, it's like that, but waaaay worse.
A lot of times "leadership" is just the willingness to say, "fuck it, y'all do what you want, but I'm doing this." I see it all the time in a corporate environment, where people will go back and forth on group meetings without anyone making a decision until finally one brave soul goes "in my opinion the clear answer is x" and then everyone gratefully goes along with it. Because now it's not their responsibility when something goes wrong! They're just following along with someone else's suggestion, and maybe it works or maybe it doesn't, but at the end of the day they don't have to worry about the consequences unless they're personally affected. In which case they might step up and argue back, and then they're stuck being a leader, too. Welcome to adulthood!
Lae'zel is the only one who ever even tries to exert some kind of control, when she tells you to follow her lead on the ship, or calls you her subordinate in the Grove. But, crucially, she doesn't ever make any serious attempt to take control: you can just tell her, "lol, no," and she sort of confusedly gives way, because she doesn't know how to handle this scenario. In her world there are commanders and subordinates, and everyone knows where they stand and falls in line. She's never actually had to take control of a situation and so at the first sign of resistance she falls back on the dynamic that's familiar to her, which is executing the commands of someone older and more experienced. She goes through a lot of growth over the game, to the point that she can take over as a resistance leader in her own right by the end, but at the beginning she's a wet-behind-her-ears private with some decent combat chops and it shows.
Otherwise, your party consists of:
Shadowheart, who's trained in infiltration and assassination and does NOT want a lot of attention brought to her or her mission for a variety of reasons;
Astarion, who has literally been a slave for two centuries and canonically takes a while to realize that he can exert an opinion beyond complaining about it;
Gale, whose only friend is his cat and couldn't project-manage his way out of a wet paper bag;
Wyll, who was probably trained for command at one point but has been doing the lone-hero thing for a decade and has a very large secret that he's trying to conceal; and,
Karlach, who's only ever been a bodyguard and a soldier and is genuinely just happy to be here.
Honestly, it would be more a surprise if Tav/Durge didn't end up as their unofficial leader, given the general power dynamics at play. The first time Tav/Durge says something like, "fuck it, we need to do something instead of stand around arguing about it, let's go check out those ruins over there," it's a done deal. They're The Captain Now! As long as they don't make decisions that fundamentally oppose something dear and important to the other group members, they're not even going to get any argument. Because at the end of the day, not one of these walking disasters has enough trust in themselves and their decision-making skills to feel any kind of certainty that they can choose the right path forward. If someone else is going to take that decision out of their hands? They're going to follow, no questions asked, right up until the moment they can't.
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