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#i know it's unreasonable to think that everyone is like them
gaylordscooter · 23 hours
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You're at the Party
“so you brought mass murderers to my place without warning me beforehand?” Cross said.
“Haha, nice.”
“don't humor them, chara.”
Blue wrung his hands together, opening his mouth to explain only for Ink to cut in.
“Listen, these guys aren't gonna cause any trouble. Besides, I thought this was a place where people could start over.” Ink crossed his arms.
“Two of them killed everyone in their universe? Hm, a Sans killing a bunch of people…Where have I heard that before?” XChara nudged Cross’s arm.
“you know that isn’t the problem here.”
Everyone gave Cross a look as if he was the one that was being unreasonable here.
Cross sighed, “fine, they can stay. but they need to pass a test first.”
Blue narrowed his eyes skeptically. “What kind of test?”
“well, i guess it's more of a favor.”
“Is this what I think it is? You're not sending them there.”
Cross waved away his concern. “it’ll be fine,” he insisted.
“What are we talking about?” Ink questioned.
Blue leaned close to Ink. “He’s totally planning to use them to retrieve his friend.”
“Oh! Hah. Ahahahahaha!” Ink giggled like he told him a joke. His eyelights reflected his amusement as he stared at Cross. “So we’re at this part now, huh?”
Cross looked confused while Blue huffed at his words and XChara looked bored.
Ink clapped his hands together. “Well then~! Have fun with that~!” he said cheerfully.
“I'm sure those tildes have no malice behind it,” Blue deadpanned.
“Oh, when have my tildes ever held malice~?”
Blue opted for putting his hands on his waist rather than gracing that with a reply.
“Anyway, I gotta bounce! I’ll see y’all later. Don't have too much fun without me~!” He painted a hole in the ground and hopped into it while waving goodbye.
“Eugh, he's like a kid that just learned about emoticons,” XChara said.
“you can't even see the tildes,” Cross pointed out.
XChara rolled their eyes. “I don't have to. I can hear it in his voice.”
“Never mind that. Cross, you can't send them there! I’ve already been making a careful plan. To just toss it out the window and replace it with an improvised one isn't a good idea!”
He rolled his eyelights and crossed his arms. “It doesn't need to work, anyway. I don't expect it to.”
Blue’s sockets widened as he gasped. “So you're just,” he gestured wildly, “sending them off to their deaths? Where's your compassion?”
“Where was their compassion when they hurt all those monsters?”
Blue narrowed his eye sockets. “Where's your compassion?” he repeated in a duller tone.
“Don't you have a Mettaton to serve? This isn't your business.” he snapped back.
Blue threw his hands up, “Wow! Sheesh. Fine. Go have fun torturing the prisoners of war.” He stormed off with a frown.
XChara and Cross watched as he walked in a direction that definitely led to nowhere rather than towards the town.
“He has a point,” XChara stated.
“Awful navigation skills is what he has,” Cross spat. He noticed XChara’s unamused face and did a double take. “Do you actually agree with him?”
“Huh! Do I agree with him that you have no right to judge these morally messed up monsters and that sending them to that freak’s place as punishment is completely hypocritical of you?” They stroked their chin and pretended to think about it hard. “Yes, Mr. ‘the reason why our world has become a hotspot for people who messed up like you!’”
“You don't care about them at all. You're just saying that to spite me.”
“I am, thanks for noticing,” they deadpanned.
Cross brought a hand to his face and sighed.
Killer awoke. He wasn't refreshed in the slightest and he nearly panicked over waking up in unfamiliar surroundings if it wasn't for Dust smacking him on the head.
No wait, he was called Dusk now. He even came up with that name for him.
Sheesh, the sudden change is gonna be hard to get used to.
Right. New chapter of his life. Again. Again again, actually.
Ironically, he was starting to get sick of new experiences.
This wasn't a bad change, really. In fact, it was a clear upgrade. Well, that's what he thought back when Nightmare first found him too, so.
He was waiting for the catch. He was ready this time.
There was a knock on the door.
Both of them had the knee-jerk reaction of summoning a blaster angled at the door but then the rational part of their minds took over and they scrambled out of bed to hold their blasters' mouths shut.
“good morning to you guys too,” said the voice behind the door.
They managed to desummon their blasters once they recognized that it was, in fact, Horror that knocked.
There was unmistakable joy on Killer’s face. He didn't say it, but he was convinced Horror was going to avoid them since they got settled in.
He skipped over to the door like a gleeful idiot and opened the door.
Killer was surprised by his getup. It was the first time he's seen him in different clothing. If it wasn't for the red eye in his socket he wouldn't have recognized him.
The first thing he noticed was the cap he was wearing. It was a generic white cap that covered the hole in his head. Other than that, his outfit was the same as any other normal Sans, sans the signature hoodie. He also looked a lot less tired.
“‘sup, h—sans. ‘sup sans,” Killer said, barely catching himself. He couldn't help but still refer to him as “Horror” in his mind, since from the day they met that's what he called him and known him as. But those names were nothing but brands that Nightmare put on him and Dusk. They weren't names that they chose for themselves.
“hey,” he replied with a small wave, mostly aimed at Dusk to acknowledge his presence even though he hadn't approached the door yet. “so…” he trailed off, unsure.
So.
They were in unfamiliar territory now. After a whole year of living with Nightmare, they formed somewhat of a schedule. A loose one, but a schedule nonetheless—mainly built off of the way Nightmare acted. 
With that thrown out the window, every step they took was unfamiliar. Potentially dangerous. Ironic, considering they were in a safer area now. At least they assumed so.
They hoped so.
They would normally eat breakfast at this time, probably. They weren't ever exactly sure what time it was, but that's how it's been their whole life. It felt like it was around that time, at least.
“my bro said there's a bakery here.” Another pause. Okay, he didn't have to make this that awkward. “you two wanna scope the place out with me?”
Killer’s smile perked up at the edges. “hate to say it, that sounded like you just asked us out on a date.”
“‘k, forget i asked.” He made the move to shut the door.
“nah, i’m joking! we’ll go—” he whipped his head to Dusk for verification, who gave him a thumbs up. “—yeah, let's go.”
So they got out of the hotel room. The lobby had a few people, unlike last time.
None of the three really acknowledged anyone there and no one acknowledged them, until some Monster Kid said a mere hello that made them all awkwardly respond; either with a curt head nod, wave, or quiet “hi” back.
Boy, they weren't ready to be perceived by anyone else. How the hell were they going to handle entering a cafe, let alone going outside? Well, Sans managed, so.
Sans was probably the most stable of the three, let's be real. He was the only one who had contact with other people before Nightmare came to them. When it comes to interaction, Killer and Dusk have done nothing but literally talk to themselves for who knows how long.
The second Sans started to open the door, Killer protested, “actually. could you just grab me something instead? i’ll stay in the room.” When he turned to retreat, Dusk grabbed him by the arm.
Dusk gave him a look that spelled “really, coward?”
“i don't think i’m ready, okay? sue me,” he said. He could already feel eyes on him. The stares gnawed away at his bones, trying to eat him alive. 
They knew what he wanted to do.
Dusk sighed, letting go of his arm. “we can't go,” he signed to Sans.
“right…” he sounded disappointed—no that was pity in his voice. He probably didn’t even expect the two to agree in the first place. “anything specific you want?”
“nothin’ with chocolate.”
Dusk shook his head.
“gotcha. i’ll be back in a bit,” he said.
Dusk and Killer watched as he sauntered off to be a normal monster that was a part of society. Then they walked at a breakneck pace back to their room.
Once they were back in the safety of their private room, they collapsed on their beds.
Killer, face buried against his pillow, groaned in frustration. “i hate this. we're safe now and i can't even go outside. do you feel it too, dusk? that tug on your soul?”
He might kill someone if he went outside. It was highly likely.
Of course it wouldn't be that easy to return to a normal life—of course his high LOVE would haunt him. He was too tired yesterday to be bothered by it, but now, any other monster he saw that wasn't Dusk or Sans had his soul screaming for more exp.
“i’m trying to ignore it,” Dusk mumbled.
He laughed. That's not going to work. That is not going to work and they both know it. 
That’s.
That's not going to work.
“it was—it was better when we were stuck with Nightmare. we wouldn't be able to—”
“It wasn’t better,” Dusk interrupted.
“—we’re going to kill someone. we're going to kill someone and it's going to snowball and it'll—hah—it'll be like a snowball of dust!”
He was choking now, on the rotten determination coming out of his skull.
“killer.”
That's what he was, wasn't he? A killer.
“killer!”
That's all he was.
“Killer.”
Oh, someone was holding him by the shoulders. Wow, everything was blurry and stained black. No, that was just the liquid in his sockets. He tilted his head down, letting it flow out until he could see better.
Oh, it was Dusk. Right.
He shuddered out a breath. He realized all his senses had turned off for the past few seconds. When the hell did he get on the floor?
His eyelights finally focused enough to stare back at Dusk. He didn't like the worried look he had on his face. He cleared his throat, trying to play it off, but all that did was make him hack out more rotten determination.
“well…” the sentence died on his teeth the second he started. “i want to go back to sleep,” he settled on saying.
Dusk brought him into a stilted not-quite-a-hug, where he brought him closer and draped his skull over his shoulder.
They just. Stayed there. For a bit.
“another episode…i’m starting a daily streak, really.” Any humor he thought that statement would have was completely absent. God, how fucking pathetic was he? Surely Dusk was struggling with his LOVE just as much as he was but he didn’t fuss about it. He shouldn’t need Dusk’s comfort and Dusk shouldn’t need to comfort him. He was so selfish. So needy.
Killer willed himself to move away from Dusk to lay back down on his bed.
The room was quiet until someone knocked on the door again.
Dusk opted to answer the door since Killer wasn't budging.
Fortunately it was Sans who was at the door but unfortunately, he wasn't alone. Behind him was another skeleton he hadn't seen before.
He wore monochromatic clothing and there were large x’s on his sleeves and boots. He looked a lot younger than all of them. He must've been in his 20’s. His eyelights were a lot bigger than the average sans, with a slitted pupil reminiscent of a cat’s.
Despite the youthful look, one glance was enough to tell Dusk that he had a lot of LOVE too. It wasn’t nearly as much as he or Killer had, but it was more than the amount Sans had.
Dusk glared at the stranger as if he personally wronged him.
Sans didn’t look too happy either with the death grip he had on the bag containing their breakfast.
“hey,” Sans said. He walked in as if everything was fine and normal.
The stranger also tried walking in as if everything was fine and normal.
A wall of bones rose in front of him to block his path.
Killer sat up on the bed, “nope. not dealing with unwelcome company now, thank you.”
The stranger cleared his throat, straightening his posture. “well, i’m actually the organizer of this place. the name’s cross. i’m sure ink told you three about me.”
“i’ve never heard of you in my life,” Killer said.
It was painfully clear that Cross was already annoyed by Killer, despite his attempts to keep his face neutral. “i’ll just get to the point—”
“he’s gonna test us. if we pass, we can stay. if we don’t, we’re getting kicked out,” Sans said. He opened the bag of food and grabbed a pastry for himself before handing it over to Dusk.
Dusk hesitated as he grabbed the bag. He quickly grabbed the first pastry he laid his hand on and turned to Killer.
“we’re getting kicked out?” Killer repeated.
“only if you don’t pass the test,” Cross emphasized.
Killer stood up as the wall of bones went away. He shambled over to him with a misleadingly calm expression. He leaned close to Cross’s head, keeping his hands by his sides. “what’s the test?”
Cross stood his ground, keeping his eyes locked on Killer as if he would attack him if he merely glanced away. “a rescue mission,” he answered with a steady voice despite the tension.
“the blue guy said you weren’t going to torture us,” Killer spat.
“it’s not torture. i have a plan. it should be simple,” Cross insisted.
He narrowed his eye sockets. “so why are you using us as fodder?”
“it’s a test.”
Sans snagged the bag from Dusk and shoved it over to Killer. “no point in complainin’, just roll with it.”
Killer pushed the bag aside. “why are you being so compliant? he’s going to send us to our deaths!”
“because we don’t have a choice,” he sighed. “besides, we’ve gone through hell and back, what’s one more trial?”
Killer caved in and grabbed the bag to fish out a pastry for himself. He took a hefty bite from it specifically to talk with his mouth full, “you gonna leave us alone after we complete this ‘rescue mission’?”
“yeah, just this one thing and you’ll all prove that i can trust you to stay here.”
Killer winced at the word “trust”. He quickly scarfed the rest of the pastry down. Now that he thought about it, he couldn’t really blame Cross for putting them through a trial considering that they’re all murderers. Well, he didn’t think Sans should be judged to the same extent as them. He needed to kill all those humans in order to survive.
“why does sans need to go too? his friends and family have already been staying here,” he asked.
Cross looked surprised by his question. Fucker probably didn’t expect him to be considerate. “the plan’s easier with three people, and all three of you worked with nightmare.”
“worked!?” Killer shoved the bag towards Sans and grabbed Cross by his shirt. “we didn’t work with that bastard. he KIDNAPPED us! if you think for one second that we associated with him? oh you got it entirely wrong, asshole! do you think we had fun being his fucking toys?” he snapped.
“killer, let go of him,” Sans said.
“y’know what? fine. i’ll do your stupid test. nothing you put me through will be worse than what he did to us,” he snarled before pushing him away.
Cross fixed the wrinkles Killer made on his clothes. His nonchalant behavior pissed Killer off even more.
He was lucky he actually listened to Sans.
“sorry, i wasn’t aware of that,” he said quietly.
Killer calmed down only slightly at the apology. He crossed his arms and scoffed, “you better be.”
Cross waited for them to finish eating breakfast before he went over the plan.
As he talked more, the three were even less psyched about doing this.
They were going to disguise themselves and then enter the place through a portal made by Ink. The first part of the plan was finding the right monster. Cross handed them an image for reference. They collectively sighed when they saw it was yet another Sans. If he wasn't wearing the same outfit it would be hard to find him, that's not to mention that Cross said the place they were infiltrating was a packed warehouse.
The second part of the plan was actually leaving the place. Which was supposedly the easier part of the plan because Ink will arrive and make another portal once they find the monster.
All in all, this just sounded like some dumb hidden object game rather than a rescue mission.
Ink arrived at the room shortly after Cross finished explaining. He came in holding a pile of clothes, their disguises.
Said clothes were all campy and flashy.
“in what world,” Sans held up a sequin jacket that had colors that could blind hawks, “are these disguises?”
“Well you're going to a party! A rave, specifically,” Ink explained.
Killer snatched a red leather jacket and bell bottom jeans from the pile. “all of these shirts suck, i’m gonna change.” He went over to the bathroom with the articles in hand.
“Oh yeah!” Ink snapped his hand. He reached into the pockets of his pants and took out three pairs of sunglasses, each were different shapes. “Almost forgot the most important part.”
“glasses,” Sans remarked.
Dusk and Sans exchanged glances with each other.
“it's really bright there,” Cross explained.
“in a warehouse?”
“trust me, the strobe lights could probably blind you otherwise.”
Sans narrowed his sockets.
Killer finished changing and waltzed out of the bathroom, flaunting his gaudy outfit.
“no shirt?” Sans remarked.
“i said they all suck.”
“surely you could just wear the shirt you already had on.”
“actually,” Cross butted in, “after you three get back we’re burning those clothes immediately. so probably don't wear anything that's actually yours.”
“and why are you doing that?”
“Cooties,” Ink deadpanned.
Cross frowned at him.
“Anyways, take a pair. Whatever you do, do not take them off.” Ink held out the shades with a wink.
Killer opted for the triangular ones while Dusk grabbed the rectangular ones and Sans got the circular ones.
Then Dusk and Sans grabbed whatever clothing, tossing any attempts to make a cohesive outfit out the window, and took turns changing in the bathroom.
Finally, Cross looked over the three, determining if their disguises were good to go. Dusk and Sans’s fits were horrible. That neon fluffy bucket hat that Sans wore was definitely not comfortable. At least Killer had a cohesive outfit.
He spent a second longer looking at Killer's sunglasses. He leaned close to Ink. “it doesn't cover his sockets fully,” he whispered.
“It’ll be fiiine,” Ink assured. He clasped his hands together. “Okay! You're all ready to go. Don't forget, you're looking for Epic, the most notable feature is the scar on his eye socket. Keep your distance from other partygoers and do not take off those shades.” His scarf swept at the floor underneath the three, creating holes that lead to their destination.
The three could barely see Ink waving goodbye as they fell.
The landing wasn't bad, all of them landed on their feet just fine, but the change in atmosphere gave them whiplash. While it was dark as night, strobe lights flashed and lit up the place erratically.
Oh god the music.
Eurodance from the 90’s was blasting with bass heavy enough to shake the building.
Oh god, the amount of monsters.
They were also dressed in gaudy outfits, which explained why their disguises were like that.
“cool. all we need to do is find whoever the hell ‘epic’ is. should we split?” Killer asked.
“oh god no,” Sans said.
Dusk grabbed them by their shoulders to drag them around and start their search.
“they're all wearing glasses too, didn't they say a scar on the socket is how we can differentiate him?” Sans said.
Killer groaned, “this is gonna take forever! we should just ask around or something.”
“you suddenly in the mood for social interaction?”
“this sensory nightmare’s making me feel like i’m floating out of my body, i just want to get this over with.” Killer approached one of the partygoers. “hey, y’know where a skeleton called epic is?”
He was completely ignored.
“cool. awesome. if we don't split up this’ll literally take forever, peace.” Killer walked off without waiting for the other two’s input.
Dusk and Sans watched as he got lost in the crowd in a whopping five seconds.
Dusk face palmed.
“maybe…maybe we can ask the dj? then they'll put out an announcement, or something,” Sans said.
“not that simple,” Dusk signed. He spelled out “fishy”.
“would it hurt to try?”
Dusk frantically shook his fist in a “yes.”
“eh, don't be a downer. where is the dj, anyway?” He looked around, fortunately most of the monsters here were around the same height as him so his view wasn't too obstructed. “yeesh, this place is big.”
The strobe lights flickered more as they all started moving to one point. The lights shone on the DJ station, the DJ themself was still shrouded in darkness. The sound of scratching discs filled the building as the music quieted down. “HOW WE FEELIN’ BROSEPHS ‘N JOESEPHS!?”
A mechanical roar of cheers rang out among the crowd.
They recognized that voice. They most definitely recognized that voice.
Dusk grabbed Sans by the arm.
“okay,” Sans breathed, “that's fine. maybe, no one knows his deal. we can just. leave the building.”
Dusk tugged at Sans, pointing furiously at the ground.
It was hard to notice due to how dark and packed it is, but on the ground were several piles of dust.
“hm. nice knowing ya.”
“You party animals havin’ fun?! I know I am, yo!” The unmistakable sound of Fresh’s voice boomed throughout the warehouse. The lights finally shone on him. He looked exactly the same as the first time they saw him. He was spinning. a disc on his finger. “I just gots some totes rad news before we continue on with gettin’ jiggy.”
The colored lights moved over to his side, revealing a stage that was hidden in the darkness, and on the stage was Killer. He looked confused, as if he didn't even know how he got up there.
Sans nearly swore but Dusk slapped a hand over his mouth.
When he caught sight of Fresh he stood frozen like a deer caught in headlights.
“Any bros know this fool?” Fresh asked. He put the disk back on the turntable and scratched his chin. “I don't. Did we invite him?” His bemusement barely masked his elation at having prey he didn't have to catch.
Killer didn't know what to do. He looked down at the crowd. The sunglasses they wore were originally all blank but the familiar “YOLO” text was on them now.
Running definitely wasn't going to help.
“Eh no biggie. I’ll give him a proper introduction to this rad party.” Fresh turned the music back on.
Killer internally swore at Cross, cursing his entire life. He was going to die and it was going to be to the fucking tune of a stupid 90’s song about sex. Well he wasn't going down without a fight.
He summoned a blaster aimed at Fresh and fired.
Only for one of the partygoers to leap into the blast to block it.
Killer watched in horror as he dusted that monster. The familiar rush of exp hit him like a truck, he couldn't help but fall to his knees.
“oh god,” Sans muttered from the crowd.
The three were completely powerless in this situation. This wasn't a fucking test. They were sent to their deaths.
What a sick joke.
“Oh snap! Well, you're just gonna hafta replace that now, aren't ya?” Fresh disappeared with a poof, promptly reappearing behind Killer.
Killer quickly pushed himself up and backed away from him.
Fresh didn't even follow him, the stage wasn't that big anyway.
He reached the edge of the stage, back to the crowd. Only Fresh could see the fear on his face.
Some of the crowd climbed on stage to grab his ankles, anchoring him down.
 He was hyperventilating, he was overwhelmed, he felt nothing at all.
He felt nothing at all.
Dusk and Sans went as far as they could away from the stage. They eventually reached a wall. Sans leaned against it in defeat while Dusk banged his skull against it.
Sans winced at the loud thud.
They could vaguely see the stage from here. Killer was gone and Fresh returned to his station.
The party continued on like nothing happened.
“so. do you think you’ll end up back in your universe after, or.”
Dusk huffed.
“right.” Dumb question.
They just stood there against the wall watching the neverending party. They questioned if this was hell or purgatory. No, this was definitely hell.
“ey, i finally found you guys.” It was Killer.
Dusk and Sans tensed.
His soul was a shape they’ve never seen it be before. It was in the shape of a flower.
“chillax, i’m not gonna do anything,” he said. His cadence was off. “you two have just been standing there all gloomy…” He put a hand on the wall just above Dusk’s shoulder. “why don’t you come join the fun?”
With how close he was, Dusk was able to see the parasitic flower in the small sliver of his sockets that wasn't covered by the triangular shades.
Killer leaned closer to his face. “c’mon, i’m getting lonely.”
Sans socked him in the face.
Dusk flinched back in surprise as Killer fell to the ground from the impact.
Sans shook the pain off his hand. “i think we're good.”
Dusk knelt down by Killer. He took his shades off and immediately plunged his hand into the socket containing the flower.
“uh—” Sans reached a hand out but was interrupted by Killer’s lucid screaming.
The nearby skeletons slowed their dancing, turning over to the interruption.
With one last quick yank, the flower snapped off. Dusk dropped it and stamped his foot on it repeatedly.
Killer gasped for air and keened in pain. Then he passed out.
Dusk blinked in shock.
Sans cringed, “think you went a bit overboard.”
“you were the one who punched him!” Dusk blurted stupidly.
“yup, and you committed malpractice.”
The music came to a halt with a dramatic record scratch.
The lights landed on the three.
“Yo, dudes. Quit harshin’ the vibe,” Fresh scoffed into the mic.
Dusk rolled his eyelights and picked Killer up, draping him over his shoulder.
They were surrounded now, by the skeletons under his control.
Dusk summoned multiple blasters overhead, ready to fire if any of them stepped closer.
“Yeesh! You three weren't even invited! What's the dealio? That scummy octo brought you here to rustle my jimmies or something?”
That. Wasn't even 90’s lingo.
There was some feedback coming from the mic. “That thing’s not comin’ here for real, actually, right?” For once he sounded unsure.
Was he actually threatened by Nightmare?
They had to roll with the lie. They could survive this. They just had to convince him he was coming.
Sans put a hand on Dusk’s shoulder. “nah yeah, he won't have to intervene as long as we get what he needs.”
“Bogus! Whaddaheck would that dillweed need?”
Sans pulled out the image of Epic from his pocket and showed it to the nearest partygoer. “we just need this guy, and we'll be outta your hair.”
“Oooh, yeah, I get what you're layin’ down.”
Said nearest partygoer grabbed Sans’s wrist.
“You're fibbin’.”
Welp.
Dusk was just about to fire the blasters on standby, only for a cluster of bones to sprout from the ceiling and stab through the giant skulls.
Dusk grumbled. He adjusted his grip on Killer so that he didn't drop him.
“you're kinda grabbing his butt,” Sans pointed out.
“we’ve done worse.”
“go back to not talking.”
“Aight. So y’all come on in uninvited and interrupt my bodacious party? S’all good. I’ll let you dudes bounce…not!” Fresh yelled into the mic. “I’m gonna enjoy taking y’all over. You're not worming your way out this time.”
Right as his sentence ended, it was disproved. A portal opened. It was like the light at the end of the tunnel.
That portal looked similar to the ones Nightmare made, actually.
“Ah, nah, what’s the dealio?”
But instead of the guardian of negativity arriving, a huge wave of tiny not-quite-skeletons poured in like a flood.
“what,” Dusk and Sans said in unison as absolute chaos unfolded in the warehouse.
These “not-quite-skeletons” acted more like hyperactive temmies. Their giant skulls were bigger than the rest of their body making them look more like aliens than anything. They all wore bandanas that matched the color of their huge star eyelights. They bounded around the place causing total anarchy.
Fresh among others were trampled by these small menaces. Some were simply dancing to the music while others were actively jumping some of the partygoers. They swore they even saw one playing with a pile of dust.
And all of this was happening while “We Like to Party!” by the Vengaboys was playing.
A second portal opened up behind them. They didn't even get to process this before someone yanked them through.
They both landed on their backs. Killer peacefully laid atop Dusk, still managing to sleep through that all. Hopefully he wasn't in a coma.
Dusk and Sans looked at each other, unsure if they were both already dead or if what they saw was all real.
Certainly one hell of a deus ex machina, but with all the shit they’ve gone through they might as well accept it with open arms.
It was Blue that stood over them, looking utterly concerned. “oh my GOD, you three almost died! well, you would’ve been under fresh’s control for whoever knows how long and then you would collapse from exhaustion and then die, but still,” he rambled. He put a hand on his face. “If my plan didn't work…well! Glad it did! Even if it wasn't the one I initially had,” he sighed in relief. “I’m SO sorry you guys went through that! I told Cross not to do it but, ARGH, no one listens to me!” He stomped his foot, it reminded them of Papyrus.
Another portal appeared next to him and two skeletons walked out. One was dressed like they just walked out of an anime convention and the other was clearly a skeleton from Fresh’s party.
“Thank you so much Dream,” Blue said.
Dream?
The two looked closely at him. There was a star made out of magic floating by his forehead. It reminded them of the crescent moon that rested near Nightmare's forehead. He was the one that created the portals similar to him too.
“you're his brother,” Sans said.
“Hm? Brother? I don’t…”
“They already know he's your brother, Dream,” Blue interrupted.
Dream darted his eyelights away guiltily. “I promise you, I’m not like him at all. I’m so sorry he held you all captive for a year! It must've been horrible.”
Dusk and Sans didn't really care about the needless pity. Both of them had one thing on their mind and it was punching the living daylights out of Cross.
“Right…” Blue said awkwardly. “Anyway, Dream, please tend to Epic, I’ll take these guys from here.”
Dream nodded and teleported himself and the other skeleton, who was apparently Epic, off to someplace else.
Blue stared down at the three who hadn't budged at all. “So, do you guys need help getting up, or.”
“i’m staying down here, thanks,” Sans said.
“Is Killer knocked out, or sleeping?”
“he's been out cold ever since Dusk ripped off the flower in his socket.”
Blue smacked the side of his skull, looking distraught. He looked around the place—they just realized they were in someone's living room—and told them to stay there before bolting off to another room.
Sans turned his attention to Killer and Dusk. “are you just gonna have him lay on top of you the whole time?”
Dusk shrugged. Honestly he was kind of comfortable like this. Killer was like a weighted blanket.
Sans finally got up from the floor, stretching his back with a groan. He stumbled over to the couch nearby and flopped onto it. He massaged his face. “god, i don't want to do anything ever again.”
Dusk hummed in agreement.
Blue came back shortly after with a stash of snacks. He dumped them onto the coffee table in front of the couch. “I got some snacks so you guys can replenish your energy. Do any of you know healing magic?”
Dusk nodded.
Blue walked over to him, leaning down to pick up Killer off of him only for Dusk to slap his hand away. “Oh! Sorry, I thought you were stuck,” he said, embarrassed.
Dusk sat up, holding Killer in his arms. He carefully put his hand over his soul and started healing it.
“you're not even going to eat first—Okay, that's fine.” Blue looked away from the poor medical practice. He waited a moment. “Okay, you're not supposed to keep going until he wakes up, you're gonna overload his soul with magic.”
Dusk rolled his eyelights and drew his hand away.
“He should wake up in a few minutes. In the meantime,” he grabbed something off the table and threw it at him, “eat something!”
The packaged snack bumped his head and fell to the floor sadly.
Dusk laid Killer down, having his head rest on his legs so that he could pick up the snack and eat it.
Blue turned to Sans. “You should eat something too.”
Sans glanced at the food on the table, then back at Blue. “why are you helping us?” he asked.
Blue looked disheartened by his suspicion. He fidgeted with his hands. “because i want to. And why wouldn't I? Everyone deserves help!”
“real naive of you to say.”
Blue’s expression hardened. “Fine, maybe it’s more than that. Maybe I want to feel like I’m worth something by helping people out. Maybe I’m sick of people dying when I could’ve done something. Maybe I’m guilty, so I help assholes like you in order to cope! Is that a selfish enough answer for you?”
Sans grabbed something off the table to eat. “sure.”
Blue sighed, crossing his arms. “good.”
They sat in silence as the two ate a bit. After a few uncomfortable minutes, Killer finally woke up.
He rolled off of Dusk. He immediately fired a round of questions, “everything hurts. why’s it so dark. where am i?”
“The lights are on?” Blue said.
“who the hell are you?”
“i think you blinded him, dude,” Sans said.
“what?!” Killer shouted.
“He shouldn’t be permanently blinded, he just needs to eat!” Blue assured. “Carelessly yanking out Fresh’s flower temporarily blinds the victim because it injures the orbit, and any injury to that area causes temporary blindness as our magic prioritizes healing it over being able to see.”
“oh, you’re the nerd that gave us food yesterday.”
“i’m the huh?” Blue mumbled. He shook off the insult and grabbed some packaged crackers off the table to give to Killer. “Anyway, we’re not at the hub right now. You guys are gonna crash at my place, which is here, until I give Cross a talk.”
Killer gnawed on the crackers without removing the wrapper, until Dusk snatched it from him to properly open it and hand it back to him. 
Killer poured the crumbs into his mouth, a good amount of it missed and landed on the floor which Blue decided to ignore.
After blinking a few times, Killer was able to see again. “where is ‘here’?”
“I don’t really have time to explain what this place is but uh, I suggest not going outside because you might end up in a different universe,” Blue said casually. “I shouldn’t be gone for too long, but in case I am, you guys are free to raid the kitchen, watch some tv, etc—Oh yeah! I also have a book containing all my notes on the multiverse if you wanna read it. Since you three are outcodes now it’ll be useful to know about some of the threats and important areas in the multiverse.”
The three of them looked at him like he was speaking a different language.
He coughed into his hand and pulled the book out from his inventory to set it on the coffee table. He awkwardly waved goodbye which got no responses and left the house.
“that guy’s too nice,” Killer remarked. “how hasn’t he died?”
“my guess is dumb luck or he’s hiding something.” Sans sat up on the couch, looking curiously at the book, which was actually just some spiral bound notebook. He picked it up, might as well read it to pass the time.
Killer stood up, stumbling a bit as he waited for the vertigo to pass. “i’m gonna snoop around,” he announced.
“have fun with that.”
While Killer wandered off and Sans read, Dusk went over to the fridge.
Sans flipped through the pages of the notebook, skimming over the titles of various names of people and places. He paused when he saw Nightmare’s name.
“dusk, get over here!”
Dusk walked over with no haste at all. He was holding two glasses, and was currently drinking out of one. He held out the other to Sans.
Sans looked up from the book to see the concoction he was giving him. It was nearly the same as all the past times Dusk made the mistake of playing bartender. Except this time…”did you add crushed chips? that thing has at least four different textures in it now.”
Dusk shrugged.
Killer walked back in the room, looking very dissatisfied. He wasn’t able to find anything interesting or any skeletons in the closet. His sights immediately landed on the drinks. “what the fuck is that?” he chuckled.
“nah, killer this ain’t for you.” Sans took the second drink from Dusk’s hand.
“aw, what?”
“anyway,” he took a sip, “this guy has notes about nightmare.”
Killer walked around the table and sat next to Sans. “woah, that's crazy.” He leaned closer at the book, but quickly switched his target to the drink.
Unfortunately, Sans was quick enough to move the drink away before he could take a sip.
Killer grumbled disappointedly and looked back at the book, actually reading the page this time. “i mean, we already know all of this, i don't see how this is…” he trailed off as he got halfway through the page. “huh. he’s had quite the history.”
“whaddya think being ‘the guardian of negativity’ means?”
“does it matter? we hate him. end of story.”
Sans eyed the line that said Nightmare couldn't feel positive emotions. If that was true, that explained a lot of things, but did that change anything? Not really. “yeah, i guess it doesn't.”
Once he was back at the hub, Blue hunted down Cross. His angry speech died on his metaphorical tongue the second he saw him and Epic having a reunion. He stopped in his tracks and watched them from a distance.
Ink appeared by his side, also watching the two. “Ah, a happy ending.” “It was completely unnecessary for any of this to happen and you know it,” Blue said sternly.
Ink pouted. “Aw, are you mad at me? It wasn’t my idea to send those three to their deaths.”
Blue scowled at him. “But it’s your fault Fresh kidnapped Epic in the first place.” Ink looked dumbfounded and then guilty, like a dog that was caught doing something it shouldn’t. “You’re getting too good at reading me…” he sighed. “How long did you know?”
“The second we found out it was Fresh that took Epic I immediately knew it was you,” Blue deadpanned. There were only a few people who could’ve let Fresh into the place, and only one person who would’ve. Besides, ever since Cross rescued Epic from his scripted death, Ink would glare at him like he personally wronged him.
“Aw,” Ink gave him a hug, “and you didn’t tell anyone?” He didn’t just not tell anyone he also covered for him. There was a reason Cross didn’t know he did it. “There wasn’t any point to.” “And you wouldn’t rat out your best friend!”
Blue flicked his cheek bone. “Sure,” he said sarcastically. He ended the hug with Ink with a gentle shove. “Those three are probably gonna try to kill Cross though. I’m making that your responsibility.”
Ink giggled at the idea of the three hunting down Cross. “Eh, he can handle that on his own.”
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lyroa · 1 year
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I got to scream about a little something 
But today one of my friends asked me for an entire playlist because she really liked listening to it while we worked. And she also said that she things I got really good taste in music. 
It just made me so happy, I shared two playlists, the one she asked for and another that’s a lot more experimental/strange, to see if she might like it too. She was really happy too. 
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strangeswift · 1 month
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chappell roan is 100% correct when she says fans aren’t entitled to her time because they’re literal strangers. and i will die on that hill, HOWEVER, i don’t want to hear you defending chappell roan if you got mad when doja cat said the exact same shit
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just read the new hatchling skin rules and am having Some Type Of Initial Emotional Reaction and am now writing down said Initial Emotional Reaction uncensored as i currently Strongly Feel A Type Of Way and Require Venting. i cannot word this more politely. i do not have the capability to render this rage into polite borderline corporate-speak for the sake of the damn rules that act like anything short of apologizing for being alive to make up for having even the most constructive understanding friendly criticism or even personal mild non-critical dislike of something like a color or a breed is tantamount to personal targeted hatemail. i cannot wait until i cool into calm bitterness later because if i think about this enough to write about it again i will just go right back to being furious and the fact that everyone ielse who's complaining is focusing entirely on the lolita fashion thing and not on in my opinion the far more significant and offensive part is pissing me off even more. extremely angry unedited ranting ahead
fr having it's own "female presenting nipples" moment right now, not that i'm particularly surprised, they've been a prime example of "conservative protestantism in a lefty-language veneer" for a long while now.
"don't adultify" is such a fucking vague and easily selectively interpreted rule, not to mention insulting for a number of reasons,
but putting that part aside the whole idea of "nothing that suggests that the dragon is an adult in a young body" is. look, i'm not exactly fond of the "adult who looks like an anime schoolgirl" trope myself, but i fail to see how in the absolute FUCK having it be canon in-universe that it is both possible and legal for someone to be forced to stay as a child permanently, is somehow LESS creepy than just saying eternal youth dragons have dwarfism. also, fuck you to anyone with dwarfism apparently i guess?
and "no zombie baby dragons" is just stupid. even fucking minecraft has baby zombies, and microsoft has steadily butchered that game into one of the most t for toddler babymode things on earth this side of cocomelon.
and "no scars on hatchlings" so fuck you to any kids with scars too apparently, even though that's way more common than anyone seems to realize. you hear that, kids? if you're under 18 and have scars your very existence is too obscene for public view. 13+ year olds will be irreparably traumatized if they have to know you exist at all! fuck you disabled kids and fuck you amputee kids and fuck you any kids that have suffered anything ever at all for not appearing as a perfect unspoiled image of conservative christian child-doll innocent purity. flight rising staff says your body and existence is inherently too nsfw to even be acknowledged as existing much less visually seen. everyone knows REAL children don't get damaged at all, and if they do then they're too horrifying and defective at their job of Being A Child Properly to exist in public spaces! how dare ugly things that might make us uncomfortable with their existence by contradicting out ideals about aesthetic moral purity be allowed where good respectable normal people can see them!
i don't say any of these words lightly, and i'm very much not the type to go around calling people whatever-ists and in fact find that kind of thing extremely annoying, useless, reductive, and more or less only ever see it used as a blunt cudgel to shame people into line so they don't question you, and have historically found it especially annoying when people pull out the accusations-of-ism card on fr staff over things that are far more likely just completely understandable (if dubiously competent) issues of certain things simply not occurring to someone on code and design level due to lack of sufficient exposure to the idea, and have always been of the belief of giving them the benefit of doubt (even if often that just means i think they either most likely made an understandable mistake that i would likely also make, or, when i'm feeling less kind, that they're simply not particularly competent rather than actively hostile) so understand how much it means coming from me when i say- flight rising staff, sincerely, from the bottom of my heart, fuck you, you ableist batch of pricks, so far up your own asses with your performative veneer of vaguely lefty-flavored language that you don't realize how fundamentally extremely conservative all of your actual beliefs underlying them are. for every update you make that i approve of there's another that does twice as much damage as the good update fixed (and i'm starting to wonder if you maybe know what you're doing with that too-always batching the fucked up shit on the tail end of some big thing you know people will be excited about, always hiding these controversial moderation changes under something shiny and new, to the point that now i dread any new good update that genuinely seems a step in the right direction and/or is something we've been wanting for awhile because i'm just constantly expecting the knife hidden behind the footnotes afterwards, the fucking "ban tiktok/gay marriage/strip rights from this population/end net neutrality/whatever/ect" clause stapled onto the end of a bill about something entirely unrelated functionally holding a change people want hostage until they allow the fucked up part through. i've been here most of the site's 10+ years and i've seen this sort of thing happen far, far too often.) and every year the shit that gets pulled on the management and moderation end of things makes me more and more almost glad i've never had an income to spend on this, and the fact that apparently the moderation behind every single other petsite in existence is somehow significantly worse fucking astounds me. the only reason i stay around here is because It's Free Dragon Pictures, because it's literally the only actually good petsite game i've ever played and not gotten sick of within a week or so (and really the only good low-energy game i've ever played in general, which i'm increasingly convinced is in spite of it's management), and because somehow, despite all of this shit, i still genuinely love the game itself, because unfortunately by some accident of creation it seems they apparently stumbled purely by coincidence into making an actually good game idea no one else quite has. and after all the fuckery that gets constantly pulled, i refuse to believe the game being good is anything other than, much like many of the of the incidents i think they're unfairly accused of malice and -ism over, an accident.
Disabled children too obscene to fucking exist. fuck you. good to know half the child population's existence requires a trigger warning to even be allowed to be acknowledged as existing to you. good to know if the heart surgery i had when i was 11 had left any visible external scars i would be considered inherently too obscene to exist to you. good to know if the overhealed and benignly potentially cancerous scar on my back from whatever actually happened when i was a toddler (i don't trust either of my parents to ever be accurate about something like that) was in a more visible spot you would demand i have a trigger warning to post selfies online. good to know if any of the shit that's broken me emotionally left visible physical marks you would think it was good and right for me to be forcibly hidden from good normal people's view and considered too taboo for even the slightest discussion without hiding it with makeup and lies, just so i don't make good, lucky, undamaged, normal people uncomfortable, god fucking forbid. should we hide the gays too, since they also make so many people uncomfy? i imagine it won't be long before disabled adults are too obscene for your polite societytm sensibilities too. i've had the feeling for a long time that amputee and disabled skins were living on borrowed time with your rules, kept technically not explicitly dissalowed where all other forms of injury and ""body horror"" are banned simply out of fear of the backlash it would cause to include them, and well. the doomsday clock on that one just got a little bit closer to midnight, huh?
the only reason i wasn't a (physically, visibly, externally) scarred kid was pure sheer fucking luck. the only reason you weren't a physically scarred kid too is pure sheer fucking luck. the only reason you're not some type of disfigured or ugly or amputated or visibly injured or whatnot is pure sheer fucking luck. you're lucky. nothing more. if having to contend with that fact-the fact of how easily it could have gone a different way and there is nothing they would be able to do about it- makes good normal tm people uncomfortable, then well, get the fuck used to it, other people children very much fucking included don't exist to cater to the aesthetic sensibilities of a lucky perfect few. the only thing that separates you from the damaged ones you find too obscene is a bad day and an unlucky hand. and one day, even if you were lucky enough to escape being damaged when you were young, you and i will both be just like them too.
more festival skin winners slots is good. elemental swords sound fun.
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hella1975 · 1 year
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hella idk what to send to you for aftg im either bored or annoyed and I don't wanna just say bad things about it 😭 like that's just rude and yall obviously like it I DONT WANNA BE SOME DEBBY DOWNER MDMWKEM
I looked at the anti aftg tag too to see if I could intermingle there and last I checked it was a mix of fans obsessed with the series and haters being just a tad harsh imo, so i couldn't even do that RIP. I'm so lonesome in what is maybe a whole group of people gaslighting me 😔👊
honestly ive said this before and i always have to tread a very fine line with it because this isn't me saying it's OKAY or like. promotable. but i do think to an extent that aftg's problematicness is actually an aspect of what draws people in a lot. like the characters and their reactions to things feel real for who they are, what they've been through and the environments they were raised in if that makes sense? and then you go in the anti-aftg tag and it's just again and again 'they said THIS thing and acted THIS way in response to THIS scenario and it was PROBLEMATIC' and like. yeah. outside of the internet bubble you're in people do actually do that. like that behaviour exists. it IS problematic, well done. you pointed at a wall and called it a wall. but like? in real life people - PARTICULARLY deprived, traumatised people that typically don't ever get therapy or community or someone telling them why something is bad - DO act this way. ive said half of my love for andrew is literally just because he took an awful backstory and let it make him a complete cunt and ive NEVER seen a character do it as shamelessly as him before. and yeah there's the argument for how it's never resolved in the book where nora ties it with a bow and points at the bad behaviour so the readers can go 'see, this is wrong' and we all clap, but idk it just for me feels that when people point at the aftg characters and go problematic! problematic! problematic! it's like they're missing the point a bit.
the point being? that we need to be putting WAY more heat on the author. i really dislike her and a lot of her writing choices and her insistance of using slurs that aren't hers to reclaim and just because it happened to make the characters feel just that bit more authentic i can still acknowledge that she CLEARLY wrote it without characterisation in mind and just added all that problematic shit anyway. like i never get why there's so little focus on nora's writing decisions and thousands of posts just fucking CRUCIFYING the characters themselves and 'let's explain in detail why this behaviour is Morally Reprehensible and they should be Locked Up Forever'. like if u want to focus on the characters so bad and pretend they're the sole reason why aftg is Problematic and Bad then why is it so hard to acknowledge that someone raised the way they were might have some misinformed, ignorant beliefs. idk lol
#but i do also think im prone to viewing these characters as TOO real and i understand there's a line to be drawn between media and reality#like at what point does 'life imitates art' become just a genuinely shit piece of media#and at the end of the day im fully aware which end of the spectrum aftg is on LMAO but this is my 2 cents#like ive met so many people that have said absolutely heinous things that the internet would eat them alive for#like homophobic sexist shit you name it they've said it and it IS problematic and uncomfortable to listen to#but i also know that while teenagers online that would call them problematic were busy claiming some new fucking buzz word to throw around#those people were actively just fucking trying to survive. like they weren't learning about why misogyny is bad#because they were fucking addicted to drugs or living through poverty or some shit like they had BIGGER PROBLEMS#like not everyone got the education or life experiences you got and while it's valid to assume someone saying horrible things#is horrible themselves there's also the times it's just genuinely a misinformed ignorant person#like they'll say 'problematic' things and i'll point out why it's bad and they'll literally go 'oh i never thought of that.' that's it!!!#like i have this childhood friend whose life has been an absolute circus start to finish like COMPLETE instability i wont even get into it#low and behold she had NO ONE educating her about things and one time i had to explain to her why having abortion rights was important#bc she just out of nowhere said she was against abortions. and i initially was outraged and disappointed that this came from her#but i didn't patronise her or shout i just explained my angle on why i think they're good and she was on side immediately#cause she always had bigger problems than researching ethics and no one to guide her so she just absorbed the first opinion she came across#and in a small town from a working class family that opinion is typically not the nice woke answer the internet demands#and with aftg particularly andrew bc he's the one who gets a lot of slack for being violent and generally unreasonable#you have someone who has literally not had someone treat him kindly a single time in his life and each new person is a genuine safety threa#like the average person just does not have to deal with that! ofc they have more time to decide their political and moral compass!#and that's so relevant to real life! popularity for the monarchy is highest amongst the working class! the people voted for brexit! trump!#the lower classes and marginalised simply do not have the resources that higher classes do#and someone fighting for survival is not going to be reading twitter threads on cancel culture in their spare time#so many issues in the world can be eased so much quicker by kindness and patient non-patronising education#than just. pointing and calling 'problematic' at anything remotely uncomfortable#idk where this came from its 2am i should go to bed and instead im ranting not even about aftg anmore this is completely it's own thing now#i feel like i worded this badly too im gonna wake up to anons in the morning accusing me of like. condoning spiking#also gloomy i am SO sorry you are the true victim of this i went ENTIRELY off piste on this one please ignore this 😭#ask
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emometalhead · 4 months
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#having a day full of mixed feelings#I suppose this is how life goes#I'm officially done with my Bachelor's degree as of today#obviously I'm proud of myself for the accomplishment and I was excited to be celebrated today#it was a long and difficult road and there were many times where I didn't think I'd live to see it through but I made it#I'm the first person in my family to get this degree and I was really looking forward to having today be my day#I had a really lovely morning and then things kind of waned#there were a few arguments. someone I spent the day with repeatedly made negative comments about something I care about#it felt awful. I know it was intended as more of a playful jab than anything but I directly asked for the comments to stop and they didn't#it especially hurt that it was a fandom thing and the person is so invested in their own fandoms yet they felt it fair to step on mine#even though I've never done that to them#then people kept talking over me and acted like I was wrong for trying to interject to finish my own sentences#also as I said in the last post I was deeply upset by how my family members spoke of my 12 year old cousin#she's just a kid and some of our close family members have such a nasty opinion of her. she's so young and she's had a rough few years#but it seems like no one except my brother and I are willing to give her any grace#I think everyone else has forgotten what it feels like to be a kid and feel as if the world is against you#on a more positive note. I had a decadent slice of chocolate cake. it was heavenly#unfortunately I was really too in my head to fully enjoy it#literally every day for 3 weeks I've been talking about the lunch I planned to have today#I knew exactly what meal and dessert I wanted from the restaurant. it's my absolute fave and isn't available at any other local restaurant#I was totally starving by time we got to the restaurant. we were out all morning and I ate a tiny breakfast in anticipation of this meal#when we got there we found out they removed what I planned to order from the menu. I was devastated.#I know it's stupid but like this was the one part of my day that I've had planned for MONTHS and I've been thinking about it for weeks#we had a 40 minute car ride where I mentioned my excitement for the food no less than 10 times so this crushed me#also I'm just really picky in general and typically restaurants only have one or two things I'm able to eat#I offered to just eat the dessert while everyone else ordered food because they were all really hungry too but they wouldn't allow it#we left the restaurant and I still feel horrible for walking out. if I had known the item was removed we wouldn't have even gone there#it happened so recently though and I feel dumb for not even thinking to check the menu online beforehand#so we went to another restaurant and I barely ate anything and now I have no appetite for dinner and I feel bad for ruining the afternoon#even though it's my day and my celebration and I feel like I'm entitled to a slight amount of unreasonableness
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tranny-fragrance · 8 months
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i watched Us (2019) and golly gee that movie is kinda confusing in terms of message
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eunhos · 9 months
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3 christmas cards & 1 birthday card i made !! 🥳🥳
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elytrafemme · 2 years
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a few days ago i had the epiphany of like, okay, i’m not kidding anybody here and the only people disagreeing with me are figments of past people who float around in my head. i have BPD. and it would take a major fucking overhaul of my entire life and the way that i have operated for seventeen years to say any different. so instead of me saying BPD with fifteen asterisks specifying i am not technically sure and this is medically recognized but not professionally diagnosed etc etc let me just say i have it.
and then now i’m like oh God but what if i don’t have it
#nightmare.personal#like at this point i think the only thing that would convince me is to have a professional say it#but my therapist literally will not diagnose me (for several reasons which are all incredibly valid) and i am not seeing another person#like i am lucky enough that i have a therapist that i can scream at for a session and then the next time talk about my last date or whatever#i don't want to have this label put on me because that's going to fuck up so much about my life#but i am literally never going to be able to get rid of that doubt that's telling me nobody thinks you have BPD you're lying to yourself#and it's like! that's not unreasonable for people to think! i know that i'm 17 and that's young for a diagnosis!#and maybe i'm biased because people have told me to look into BPD because of my behaviors since i was 13#but i've watched testimonial videos and spent hours in forums and talked to people diagnosed with BPD and read articles about it#and i've studied the symptoms like the back of my fucking hand and i've tracked my behaviors and i've done EVERYTHING#and i've considered EVERY other option i've considered: autism ptsd bipolar adhd. to name a few#and NONE of them explained this the ONLY thing that makes sense is bpd#not even other personality disorders explain it it's just this one#and i know people think that you shouldn't seek labels but. i have been looking for a community for so long#and now i think i have one. but i still feel like i don't actually have it#and that everyone thinks i'm lying but just isn't saying anything yet
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maddy-ferguson · 1 year
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Yeah and since this doesnt only involve writers but also other production stuff, i wonder how theyre gonna start filming in may or june? Bec that would also be breaking the strike too... like idk how they are going to work around that. But anyway. My estimation is that the strike will at least take 3-4 months at the very least. So like. Yeah. 2025 release seems more likely bc the strike also involves other production staff
i can't lie to you i don't know shit about how american strikes in the entertainment industry work and i was a baby (6) and not american in 2007 but i mean yeah that season 5 is never seeing the light of day i fear
#this implies that i now am american which i'm not. but i'm no longer 6#again i'm kidding and i know everyone was already like it's gonna be 2025 for sure#but as a normal person i've always been a believer in tv shows not needing three years (that's three times 365 days +1) to produce one#season sue me...#i don't think the people behind season 5 of stranger things were ever on my team but like whatever. at least this is for a good reason#not that taking your time is a bad reason. it's just. unreasonable. to me. who knows nothing about how any of this works. i mean i'm the#one who's watching tv i think my opinion matters. hashtag humble#anyway do you know what the crossing the picket line thing reminds me of? even though that's not what you said? it reminds me of#that one episode in season 2 of grey's anatomy where the nurses are on strike and george is like guys my parents are union workers i can't#cross the picket line this is not who i am and so he spends the day outside protesting while the others are in the hospital. god remember#when grey's was good#my knowledge of how tv shows were affected by the strike is like oh this season is shorter it's probably because of the 2007 strike and#that's kind of it. like *vanessa hudgens voice* yeah tv shows are gonna be canceled which is terrible but like...inevitable? idk. maybe i#shouldn't be doing this right now.#i'm not complaining about anything i was already complaining before. i said good for them like ten days ago okay i'm an ally#i'm joking but i mean. i mean it lol. i love strikes okay i'm george o'malley#ask
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radiantsong · 2 years
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this will be deleted in five seconds but my friend got me talking about how i actually feel about tr*p and i... am close to crying. i’ve been shitposting to cope but it’s honestly really really shitty. celebrían isn’t in the books, the one mention to her has been cut from the movies, the musical “mentions” her only if you read between the lines of the lothlórien song and we don’t know that they intended to recall her, and now that we finally -- finally -- get an adaptation in the second age she doesn’t get so much as a mention. it honestly just... feels like i’m the only person in the world that even cares about this character and it feels so lonely
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krazy-ky-sta-hatter · 2 years
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...One day I am going to snap and blow a fuse.
I'm trying to get over my anxiety, and every time I think I might be okay to venture out into the rest of the house again, my flatmate brings people around without telling me again, and I'm back to square one.
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Something about Dave and L.L. both having abusive parents you knoooow is due to end poorly y'know. Like last time someone shared trauma with L.L. they both nearly ended up dead (Beau). VERY different circumstances of course but it goes to show how bad it tends to go.
I'm not going Anywhere in particular with this like I don't have a scenario or anything I just know their traumas would clash and blend in a way that'd incapacitate each other.
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selfconsumerofmywoes · 9 months
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my friend has just dumped her boyfriend and is angry texting me about how he’s reacting and it’s so hard to be on her side because honestly i get where he’s coming from
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sirfrogsworth · 3 months
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I woke up and everyone was saying Biden did horribly and I saw a bunch of folks saying he has dementia.
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And, while he did sound weak and tired and stumbled on his words, he did not sound like he had dementia.
That's just... old brain.
When people are that old and tired and you rush them to answer complicated questions, that's what they sound like.
And I don't actually think Biden did as bad as people were claiming. Not that I am saying he did good at all—it's clear he shouldn't be president. But he answered almost every question. He remembered facts and statistics. He wasn't a drooling invalid.
But expecting an 81 year old to give detailed answers in 120 seconds seems unreasonable. Timed debates are so stupid and I don't know why people agree to them.
SOLVE WORLD PEACE IN TWO MINUTES!
It seems Biden is fine if he is allowed time to gather his thoughts and speak when his brain catches up.
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It's like people have never been around the elderly before.
And the only reason Trump didn't stumble as much is because he just regurgitated his rally-speak. He used the exact same lines he always uses and none of it lined up with the actual questions he was asked. And if he were forced to answer what was asked I think he would have looked just as bad.
I mean, why aren't people talking more about that right now?
If someone asked me "What is the name of your cat?"
And I responded, "Cannibal drug dealers from Mexico are going to eat your grandma."
How is that not a worrying sign of my cognitive function?
My dad had bouts of delirium, which is similar to dementia. And that is not something you can hide. It can't be masked. It isn't subtle. Nothing I saw hinted at dementia.
Just olds being old.
*heavy sigh*
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krispiecake · 1 year
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soooo funny actually
#ive asked if staff can give me like just a general heads up if they know someone is moving in#not like any private info not even their name just like a ‘hey theres someone new that you might see around’#bc im autistic and change can rlly throw me off like u know a pretty basic autistic trait#and i literally just got told ‘no offence what does it have to do with you’#im not asking for their full name list of diagnosis’s nhs number and their fave colour#just you know. if theyre gonna be living here or not.#and its not like im not gonna find out bc im gonna see them it’s unavoidable information that everyone knows#i just want like a heads up like ‘hey asher someone new is moving in tomorrow’ like thats IT#so i dont freak out when theres just a whole stranger in communal areas or whatever and act weird#and i get it if like people cant tell me weeks in advance people are moving in on this day exactly at this time#LIKE IM NOT ASKING FOR THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!#or even AFTER theyve moved in like ‘hey just so you know xx moved in yesterday’#and really dont think im being unreasonable by asking them to just tell me rather than let me get anxious about a stranger#like idk if that’s maintenance or staff or management or a new resident like not knowing is what makes me anxious#and rn im in my hours and my staff member is just talking to another staff member about tanning and bikinis and shit like theyre not#MY HOURS. idk#im just pissed off they acted like i was insane for asking for a heads up#they were like oh idk if we can cuz we dont always know exact dates and things change and and and and#and when i first brought it up they just kept saying different variations of how does it effect you why do you care what does it have to#do with you and its like. you know. the autism and the anxiety disorders u know the things you know about and are meant 2 be helping me with#UGHHHHHHH
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