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#i love corn dude
fuwaprince · 9 months
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When somebody only uses my chosen name while putting me down, it kind of makes me wish I didn't have a name at all.
And when somebody only uses my pronouns when they try to coerce me into something, then switch back to they/them when talking about me to anybody else, it kind of makes me uncomfortable af.
I sincerely do not enjoy being labeled or referred to. Being referred to is such a negative experience for me irl.
Yet not giving people a set of name/pronouns when they ask automatically seems to make them think you're secretly a serial killer trying to cover up something?????? Or like you're untrustworthy and must be hiding because you're a Bad Person instead of just not wanting to label yourself.
Can I just please not be forced to label myself for everybody else's comfort?
I feel like that information is so personally intimate anyways like unless you know me and we're close, why do you even care? I don't think it's necessary for the first stages of getting to know somebody even though in this culture we've normalized it to be that way.
Plus if I don't give you a name then I have the opportunity to earn one. Give me a name that you think I deserve and let it be what you honor me by instead! How about that? It's probably the only way I'll be comfortably perceived since some people will change my labels as they see fit regardless. Just call me what you like, I feel like my name/pronouns have been corrupted as is
#i feel weird about having a name and a gender and pronouns assigned to me.... such a weird thing to make a big deal#i mean it's a big deal as in you need to write names down for job apps#and when i walked in to request for emergency aid the person looking at my case asked for my pronouns#which just felt so irrelevant and it didn't make me feel any more respected#and i can tell some people are so uncomfortable using the pronouns that i say are mine that they'll opt out for ones they give me instead#which is like WHY DID YOU ASK IF YOU WERE JUST GOING TO DO THAT ANYWAYS#silly things just don't make sense and to me they bring more trouble than they're worth#those things have been used as weapons against me so why keep giving ammo yk?#also i like the process of earning a nickname#one time this girl got offended that i reffered to her as snake girl the second time we met and i was like???#imagine being offended that somebody remembered you for having 4 corn snakes instead of using your boring old name#like when people call me fuwa i feel like they're honoring me as a blogger#i get it i get it this culture is just so strictly uncreative and boring#if i had a cool new name from each person who knew me i would be so cool with that#like if somebody i met found out i liked sasuke and then started referencing to me as sasuke boy i would actually be so happy#idk dude#also sorry to that girl for calling her snake girl but honestly her loving her 4 snakes actually felt more significant to me than her name#in other cultures they refer to parents as “[insert child's name]'s mom/dad” and it's actually seen as being so respectful#like it's the family bond that gets honored instead of the individual and idk maybe some people take that to be a negative thing but#imagine as a parent loving your kid so much and then everybody identifies you as the parent who loves their kid#maybe that's dehumanizing in a sense idk#i see it as an honorable thing to be bestowed by others#yeah maybe people can be mean and call you “poop boy” for the one time you shit your pants while drunk#i get not liking being called “poop boy” but like dude... you're a legend and the story behind you earning that name would be legendary#idk i guess it's all about perspective#i don't know if I'm making sense#feel free to share thoughts#late night blogging
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patronsaint-prometheus · 10 months
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@postalocalypse is my trophy husband, but only in the sense that the universe gave him to me as an award… for surviving this long as a damn idiot.
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Malleus, I'm going to let you in on a little secret.
Kidnapping people is hostile behavior! Threatening to kidnap people is hostile behavior! Possessing people against their will is hostile behavior!
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LOOK ME IN THE FUCKING EYES AND TELL ME THIS WASN'T HOSTILE, MALLEUS!
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libraford · 4 months
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Park Cleanup Pet Peeves
I'll be starting my seasonal gig at Parks and Rec in a couple months and I've got a couple things I wanna say. I know that this will probably not reach the people who need to hear it, but if ONE LESS person leaves the parks a mess, I will be That Much Happier.
-You're not supposed to smoke, drink, or have sex in public parks but I know that people will anyway. But if you are going to do those things, please dispose of the evidence in the trash cans. A human has to pick these things up.
-Dog poop goes in a bag. Bag goes in the trash can.
-The little wax paper liners in the women's room? See you're supposed to put your pad/tampon in that wax paper bag, take the bag out of the bin, and then dispose of it in the actual trash can. Don't feel bad, no one told me either. Also no one told the dudes I work with. But this reduces direct exposure to bodily fluids, especially as the summer gets on and it gets hot in those bathrooms.
-On that subject! The little bins that they go in next to the toilet? Don't stick trash in there. Don't put diapers in there. Also don't put beer cans crushed in such a specific way that I slice my hand on them as I try to jimmy it out of there. Literally, that bin is too small for most things. They are meant specifically for those brown bags. Please for the love of god, throw things in the trash can.
-As for the urinals, please no solids. Most commonly gum and chewed tobacco, but you can use your imagination.
-If you're doing a photo shoot or an event with confetti, please use a paper confetti instead of a plastic one- its easier to get rid of.
-If you're doing a pizza party, we'd rather you stack the pizza boxes in a pile next to the trash can instead of trying to fit them in the trash. Because then we can just throw the trash bag over the top and tie it instead of trying to fish it out. This kind of goes for any big trash- if it won't fit in the trash can easily, don't try.
-Please don't call cops on people sleeping in the parks if they're not bothering anyone. Even if they've been sleeping there all day. Dude's just trying to chill.
-Destruction of the toilets will result in the indefinite locking of the restrooms. You ruined them and now everyone at the softball tournament can blame you for it.
-Parks people are not the police. We are maintenance workers who are not trained to handle most emergencies and the most we can do in any situation is report to the proper department. Please don't look to us for answers if someone is starting a fight.
-Also please don't spit on us for driving on the path. We're permitted to. Its essential for us to drive on the path to do our job.
-please don't abandon animals at the park. Rehome them properly. I spent a whole week trying to catch a rooster last summer.
-look, I get it- 'oh no, your pretty building has writing on it!' Grafitti is so edgy. We get it. But it means Jacob has to sand it off now so that the kids at the birthday party don't see a giant drawing of a weiner. Acts of rebellion that create more work for the working class are not revolutionary.
-please do not set fire to the Tiny Free Library. Why did you do that? That's mean.
-please do not feed bread to ducks and geese. Corn, birdseed, lettuce- those are better for them. If you want to reduce tge amount of goose poop in the parks, shop feeding them bread.
-also do not anger tge geese. They remember what its like to be dinosaurs.
I'll have more later, probably, once the season wears on.
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bunnis-monsters · 1 month
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Hi welcome back, hope you're feeling better! Always good to get that self care in. Anywho, if it's okay I'm going to throw an idea at you that has been floating around in my head. I've been on a smidge of a naga hyperfixation lately, plus I love your Fern series, so it got me thinking: how cute would a mini naga be? Like part of the appeal of nagas is them being big boys, but on the other hand, what if smol corn snake dude?
OMG little snake guy…
I have two ideas with this in mind!
First, let’s say he’s not absolutely tiny, but about the size of a golden retriever. Little naga!bf that’s super protective of his mate, and very strong despite his small stature. He’ll sit in your lap, nuzzling you with his lower body wrapped around your legs.
All he wants is for you to rely on him… even if he’s constantly clinging to you and wanting to be pampered. Maybe he’s got a mommy kink who knows… but he’ll still rattle his tail and act all intimidating to protect you!
And my other idea, absolutely tiny naga bf that’s the size of your palm! So cute, but also very deadly! His bite can take down an elephant, so he’s feared by all the other creatures of the forest… except you.
You love him, and god how he wants to be big so he can show you just how much he wants to breed that fat cunt of yours. He’s so damn protective, hissing and showing off his fangs to whoever gets close!
Anyways… yeah, what concept do y’all like better? Or should I make a separate post for both?
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prehistorictriforce · 2 years
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i love my brother but good lord this man pisses me off so fucking bad
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jujutsubaby · 6 months
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🫧 skin care daddy 🫧
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☆ pairing: satoru gojo x afab!reader ☆ summary: your skin's been breaking out recently and you're stressed at work and you have your sister's wedding to attend in a week. according to the internet, this is the best spa in town, and you're lowkey desperate at this point...it can't be that bad right? ☆ tags: modern au ☆ warnings: penetrative sex, unprotected sex, oral sex (f!recieving), facial, dirty talk, fingering, flicking the bean?? idk ☆ a/n: guys i swear i am cooking in the kitchen with the asks from my follower event AND other shit OK!! sorry for the wait on everything but here is a little crumb bc i love u all!! i was feeling unhinged bc i saw two things: 1) a spa called skin care daddy and 2) a post or one shot where the reader got a facial from gojo and it cleared her skin. idk i just felt inspired to make this bc it felt the universe was asking me to. not proofread some plot with corn u know the vibes babes xx ☆ word count: 7k+
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"sorry, we're all booked for this weekend and the next. we usually recommend that our customers book 3 weeks in advance for our services at the ritz carlton luxury spa." the lady on the other end of the line was objectively speaking very politely, but you were far too frustrated with your situation to notice.
"great, yeah, no, thanks." you say quickly, hanging up the phone and groaning into your pillow.
"no luck at the ritz?" you turn to face your best friend, nobara.
"they're all booked, what a surprise!" you say sarcastically, your voice still slightly muffled by the pillow.
"i mean, c'mon, y/n. your face is not that bad..." nobara tries and deeply fails to comfort you, making you chuckle half heartedly.
you get up from your bed and walk over to the full body mirror of your closet in order to get up close and personal with your face. your fingers stretch on the skin around your breakouts as you study them with determination, as if just willing them to be gone will do the trick. it doesn't.
"it's bad enough that all the aunties will say something snarky to me all day."
you're usually one to always follow through on your skincare routine, am and pm, and watch what you eat carefully so that you don't get breakouts. but you recently went through a rough patch (read: a hellish period) and your face took the brunt of the damage. it wasn't your fault you were having massive cramps and craved hot cheetos the entire week (it was so worth it) but now, a week before your sister's wedding, you're facing the consequences.
you sigh. the ritz was the fifth place you guys called that didn't have any space for an all day facial, but you couldn't run out of hope. back to the drawing board.
you open up your laptop and get back to searching on google maps, as nobara does the same thing. you're grateful she's helping you out during your, albeit, dumb crisis, but what are girl friendships for? a spa you've never heard of before suddenly catches your eye and you zoom in. skin care daddy? you read the finer print underneath it. best day spa in tokyo.
you snort. best day spa in tokyo my ass. if it really was the best day spa in tokyo, why have you never heard of it?
nobara laughs, almost on cue. "wait, dude, are you seeing this spa?" she turns her phone around and you see she's also looking at skin care daddy. "this has to be a joke, right? no way would they be allowed to open up a spa named that, right?"
"ohmygod, i was just looking at that!" you say excitedly. "it literally sounds like a sex bot made it for unsuspecting horny losers to click on and get like, a crazy virus." you both laugh at how ridiculous this place sounds.
nobara's laugh almost abruptly stops as she scrolls down the place. "wait, stop. this place has like...over ten thousand reviews and a 4.9 star rating..."
you immediately click on the place and take a closer look at the reviews and ratings and see she's right. "i don't think i've ever seen a place have this many reviews with consistent ratings?" your brows scrunch as you read aloud some of the top reviews.
"this spa has given me the some of the best facials of my life. i always come to this spa whenever i'm in the area, and the people working there are obsessed with taking care of their customers. 10/10" you're baffled by the review sounding so...weird but you think nothing of it. you make a mental note that you are kinda desperately looking for a miracle facial to help with your breakouts, so maybe you shouldn't count this place out just yet.
nobara half heartedly scoffs as she reads the next one. "i've had chronic acne and back pain for years until i saw someone from here who made me feel soo good. you'll be coming here all the time once you go. maybe even multiple times a day."
"how good can this place be if you have to go multiple times to make sure your spa treatment worked?" you say, rolling your eyes at these reviews. "these can't be real right?"
"they sound incentivized or like someone paid them to write it or somethin'" nobara surmises.
"maybe it's a cult or something," you say, causing both of you to double over in laughter.
"a cult disguised as a spa is a bit too insane, even for tokyo." nobara says as she scrolls through and skims more reviews. "aren't you looking for a facial anyway? everyone's saying they're really good here...you know...despite the..." she gestures with her hands the reviews on her phone.
"ugh, am i for real that desperate for clear skin that i'm willing to go to a shady ass day spa?" you roll on to your back on your bed and stare at the ceiling, contemplating.
"can't be that shady if it's ten thousand reviews. say what you want but that's a lot of reviews to pay money for."
nobara has a point. you grab your laptop and try to look for a link to their website and see they don't have a website. interesting. not a red flag but just interesting. maybe i have to call for bookings? you search for a phone number, but fail to find one.
"wait, are you able to find any contact for this spa?" you ask noabra and you see her squinting her eyes at the phone.
"no i wasn't but i saw a review that basically said this spa is a walk-in type of deal?"
"it's a walk-in but has thousands of reviews? how does that even work? people are probably waiting years in line to get in?"
"dunno," nobara shrugs, and puts her phone back in her pocket. "maybe it's like a 'if-you-know-you-know' type of thing so it's like popular through word of mouth of somethin'"
damn. even more shady, then. you chew on your lip and stare at the ceiling again, trying to imagine all the things your aunties will say to you at the wedding.
"27 and still unmarried? shame."
"oh, you really need to watch your diet, the breakouts will never go away otherwise."
"clear skin is the first step to find a man who will desire you, y/n."
you feel like your skin is burning thinking about the so-called "advice" you're likely to receive at the wedding. normally you wouldn't care, but your hormones have been kind of out of wack with the new birth control you started recently, and you're not sure if you can really take any form of bullshit other than your sister's this weekend.
your thoughts are interrupted by nobara getting up from your chair. "alright, i'm off to work. need a ride to skin care daddy?"
"yeah, actually," you say as you slowly get out of your bed and change our of your pajamas.
"wait, what?!" nobara says with wide eyes. "i was actually joking when i said that. are you seriously gonna go? y/n, i dunno about this one..."
"c'mon! it's like you said, it's weird but it's not necessarily shady..." you say, mostly trying to convince yourself as you put on a pair of your favorite lazy girl black flared yoga pants.
nobara seems to consider it for a moment before responding. "kay, fine. but if i take you there and it's some abandoned warehouse-"
"then we'll drive away. no way in hell i'm about to die for this place." you assure nobara, putting her at ease.
you quickly don a thrifted gray hoodie and put your hair up in a messy bun. you don't care to put on any makeup, since you're probably gonna have to take it off anyway. if the day spa isn't shady and in an abandoned warehouse.
you quickly grab your keys and wallet before gesturing to nobara to leave. she sighs, looking at her phone one more time.
"fuck it, let's go before i change my mind."
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"okay it says it's just right around the corn-"
"OH MY GOD?!" you're unable to hold back your disbelief as nobara took the corner to, what you think, might the chicest and prettiest boutique you've ever laid eyes on. the front was adorned with a gorgeous light blue awning with european style bell-shaped pendant lights making it almost glow during the day time.
"what the hell...ain't no way..." noabra is at a loss for words for how fancy it looks. "they have the money to rent out a place like this but no website?"
"or have a phone number." you mumble as you open nobara's car door. you turn around and give her a quick wave. she tells you to give her a call and tell her how it is after and you promise to do so. as nobara drives off, all the skepticism evaporates from your body looking at the dainty and cute decor all over the place.
you walk in to a fairly large lobby, with a desk in the middle and waiting chairs surrounding it. the calming scent of lavender, green tea, and patchouli hits your nose, and your guard immediately drops; the aroma relaxes you almost instantly.
you look around and are surprised to see only two other women in the waiting chairs on their phone. one of them seemed older, kind of like a mother, and the other seemed to be your age, but far more demure.
"hey, there! welcome to skin care daddy! we're determined to take care of you all your needs, no matter what! how can i help you today?" your head whips around to the guy sitting at the reception desk, and you feel a bit embarrassed; he must've noticed how lost you looked here, and you force yourself to straighten up and regain your composure as you slowly walk to the front desk. you take a closer at the guy with shaggy black hair sitting in the chair in front of you.
"hi..." you squint to see the faint print on his name badge. "yuta".
"yup! that's me!" he chirps. you know he probably has to exaggerate his good mood for the sake of the job but it kind of irks you. "what can i do for you today, miss?"
"yeah, uhh...what services do you guys offer? i tried looking online but you guys didn't have a website and..." your wandering eyes can't help but look around skeptically around the front desk and the doors on either side of the lobby.
"well, we offer whatever you need, miss. just tell us what you're looking for and we'll have it. i guarantee it."
"okay, well. my sister's getting married next weekend and..." you gesture to your face. "my life has been all sorts of stressful and hormonal so honestly, i'm just looking for something that can help me feel refreshed-"
you're interrupted by someone entering in from the right side of the lobby door. it's a woman who, you must say, looks glowing. her skin is bright and she quite looks like she's almost levitating. guiding her out of the spa is a young man, around your age, with blond hair and round glasses. he's unbelievably built, with strong hands rubbing her back softly and a chiseled jaw. he's wearing what you think is the uniform of this place: white dress shirt with the top two buttons undone and black slacks.
your breath gets caught in your throat momentarily. no fucking way. this guy works here? he's so fucking...hot. you have to force your eyes to tear away from him as you try your hardest to focus back on your conversation with yuta.
yuta chuckles as he follows your gaze. "ah, yes, mr. nanami is a customer favorite esthetician here. anyway, seems like you're going through a rough time and you came to the perfect place! normally, i would recommend the oxygen facial, but since you said you have a wedding..." yuta types something on the computer for a bit. "personally, i would recommend the full body tokyo special."
you're not entirely what an oxygen facial is, nor what the tokyo special is, and you feel even more stupid asking this guy who seems to be in college for more information.
"um, sorry, what's a full body tokyo special? i think i just need a really good facial."
"oh no worries, miss. i apologize. the full body tokyo special consists of a hands-on full body aromatherapy massage and our famous milkbomb facial, which'll do wonders for your skin." he winks at you. why did he wink at you?
you're unable to think about whether or not you even wanna do anything here when a group of men barge in through the left door of the lobby, laughing loudly, before lowering their voices.
one of the men is a dark haired man, seemingly a little older than the other two and yourself, but also very much ripped just like mr. nanami. you tried not to stare at the skin tight black shirt he wore that attenuated his pecs but miserably failed. he took the quickest glance at you and gave the faintest smile, revealing a slight scar on the left side of his lip. a scar that makes him sexier? you've gotta be kidding me. you follow his gaze to the older woman you saw sitting here when you came in, who know looks completely enamored by the man.
"there's my favorite mama," the man coos, holding an arm out for her as she skipped to him. he leads her to the other door, and you could hear them giggling and talking, as if this wasn't the first time they've seen each other.
"aight, see ya later, man." the other dark haired man said to his friend, before making eye contact with you, and then giving a slight smirk to yuta. he heads straight to the demure girl you saw when you walked in, and holds his hand out to her and she blushes and grabs it.
"th-thanks for seeing me again, geto-san." the girl says so softly that you have to strain your ears to listen.
"i told you to call me suguru..." you hear him joke as they disappear behind the door.
"like what you see?" you turn your head to the last guy, who now is far too close for your liking. you take a small step back, which makes him chuckle.
"yuta-kun! who do we have here?" the man asks boisterously. despite being indoors, he's wearing dark circled sunglasses. what a douche.
"oh, hey gojo-sensei. this is..." yuta looks at you, waiting for you to say your name.
"y/n." you say a bit too late, still trying to process the barrage of attractive men that just showed up all at once and what they had to do with the spa.
yuta starts filling in the man about what you were looking for, as you take in the man who's intently listening to him. he has white hair, and is wearing the same uniform as mr. nanami was, with three buttons undone and his hair slightly disheveled. he's also really tall. like really tall. like he towers over you easily tall. but also, just as well built like everyone else.
what is this place? you knew men could work in salons and parlors and spas, but this place seemed to be exclusively run by them. and not just any men, really attractive men. and what's worse is that you were not complaining. sure, it's a bit weird but there's really no other choice for you at this point.
"ahh, the tokyo special, huh?" he says, turning at you and giving you a bright smile which you suspect he gives to everyone who comes in here. "nice choice."
"he's the one who chose it, and i'm not even sure if i want it." you say, pointing to yuta, and trying your hardest to stand your ground. you have to really make sure this spa treatment is actually gonna help and not just a scam for your money.
"well, he chose right. i've never seen you here before, so you must be new here, right?" you nod, suddenly feeling really small and embarrassed about your attitude before. god, you're never one to behave badly in front of service workers. the hormones are really doing a number on your mood. maybe you could benefit from this "tokyo special".
he leans down to meet your eyes and takes off his sunglasses, and you’re face to face with the most gorgeous ocean blue eyes you've ever seen. through an almost hypnotic effect, you feel much calmer than you did before, and more trusting of him. "well, lucky for you, i've got an opening right now. i'll help you feel right at home." he gives you a wink, and you can't help but feel there's some other hidden meaning behind what he says.
"umm...well..." you say, holding on to the thin strings of your resolve.
"gojo-sensei is the best masseuse and esthetician here, especially for first timers like yourself, miss y/n. i guarantee you'll leave the establishment more than satisfied with his work." yuta assures you with a smile.
and with that, your resolve completely dissolves and you nod and hand him your credit card and he takes the information. gojo touches the small of your back ever so slightly, and you hope he doesn't feel you shiver at his touch.
"he just loves kissing up to me so he can get a full time job here after college. i'm his favorite cousin, after all." he says, making you giggle as you walk through the two panel doors into the spa.
"thanks for taking me in during your opening, mr. gojo." you say politely, feeling grateful as he leads you down the corridor of the neat, clean, and minimally decorated hallway.
"i think you're gonna be the one taking me in," gojo mumbles under his breath while opening the door to a room that looked like a doctor's office. a single lavender massage table greets you with small cabinets on either side.
you're unable to catch what he said. "what? did you say something?"
"i said call me satoru. no need to get so formal with me, i'm just some dude who works here." he chuckles. he locks the door as you sit up on the massage table awkwardly, unsure of how you should be positioning yourself or what exactly he was planning.
gojo goes to the corner and pulls out a fluffy white bathrobe and hands it to you. you're blown away by how soft it feels in your hands -- luxury at it's finest, you guess.
"okay, i just have a quick questionnaire i need you to fill out, probably will take around a minute," he says, as he grabs a clipboard with a pen attached to it from another drawer and takes a seat on a padded lab stool. he rolls closer to you until his long slender legs are almost touching your calves.
"alrighty here...okay, first question…” the questions gojo reads off are normal enough, with various clauses consenting to the spa treatment, confirming your age, and so forth. they don’t start getting weird until later. “ok last three, we’re almost done.” you notice a shit-eating grin on his face as he scribbles your answer to the previous question. “okay, are you a virgin?”
“what?!” 
“are you a virg-”
“i heard you the first time. what kinda question is that? that’s so invasive, what the hell are you play-” you’re ready to give an entire speech to this guy about how inappropriate and irrelevant the question is. 
“it’s fine if you don’t wanna answer it, i just can’t continue the treatment if you don’t.” gojo says this so simply and nonchalantly, as if the question was about your favorite color, and not an intimate detail about your sexuality. 
“okay, fine. not a virgin.” you cross your hands in irritation. 
“not…a...virgin…” you hear him say under his breath as he scribbles something you cannot see on his clipboard. you try leaning forward to see what he’s writing (and if there really was a question like that on the questionnaire but he quickly pulls it closer to his chest, giving you a teasing smirk. “are you on birth control?”
“y-yes?” 
“good to know. last question: got any STDs i need to know about?”
oh, for fuck’s sake. this is ridiculous. does he think you’ve never been to a spa before? the usual thai place you go to never asks this many questions. “do you have any STDs i need to worry about? what is this? 20 questions?”
“you can ask them to me back, i’d be happy to answer them.” he says calmly with a coy smile. “in fact, i’ll answer them right now. no, no, and no.”
you sign in defeat. “no for me too.” maybe this is what happens when a place has like, ten thousand 5 star reviews on google maps. they just ask the weirdest questions. there’s a small voice berating yourself for folding so easily regarding his questions, but whatever. you’re ready to get this treatment over with. 
“okay, take off all your clothes and wear the bathrobe. do you want me to step outside?”
what the hell kinda question is that? of course, he’s supposed to step outside? “um, yeah?” you say it almost obviously, not feeling bad about the attitude that’s coming out of you. 
gojo raises his hand in surrender. “sorry, just askin’...” he grabs his clipboard and steps out of the room, saying he’ll be back in five minutes for the warm up massage. you quickly undress yourself. you have a feeling he’s the type to come in within seconds of knocking on the door without checking to see if you’re decent. you’re unsure where to place your clothes other than the table next to the cabinet so you neatly fold them, hiding your underwear and bra within the folds of your yoga pants and sweatshirt. 
just as promised, gojo shows up five minutes later with one knock before welcoming himself in. he’s holding a dark colored glass bottle filled with a calming essential oil for massaging, and turns on the diffuser in the room. 
“thanks for undressing,” he says, looking at the neatly folded pile of clothes on the counter. “alright, here’s how this is gonna go. i’m gonna give you a nice full body massage to loosen your muscles up, and then we do the facial last, sound good, princess?” 
your skin tingles at him calling you that nickname, but you ignore it. there’s no way i can let my mind wander like that when he’s giving me a massage. you nod your head in agreement, and lay on your back slowly, fidgeting with the ends of  your bathrobe so that you’re not totally exposed to him. gojo slowly hovers his hands over you and lightly touches your stomach, patting it to get your attention, but it causes you suck in a breath a bit too loudly. 
“gotta go on your stomach for me for this one,” he says, urging you to flip around. “gonna undo this, okay?” he tugs at the knot you made on your bathrobe and you nod. he slowly undoes it, and you feel exposed as your breasts peek out through the sides. you cross your legs almost immediately, feeling incredibly exposed in front of a fully clothed gojo. 
you quickly turn on your stomach before he has a chance to take in your body. you feel his cold fingers slowly expose your back, as he stops right before the hump of your ass. you hear him squeezing out some of the oil and warming it up in his hands as he gets to work on your back. 
you suck in a sharp breath between your teeth as his cold fingers explore the knots on your back. 
“cold isn’t it? you’ll get used to my fingers, promise,” he says sweetly, as he hits a spot on your back that’s been particularly bothering you as of late. it’s too late when you let out a moan, and you hear him chuckle. “hit the right spot, didn’t i?”
he continues to undo the knot on your back, and moan back a breathy affirmation as you continue to try (and fail) to hold back your noises. “f-fuck, gojo, that feels s-so good…” you say in between his movements. 
you feel his hot breath in your ear. “told ya to call me satoru, don’t forget it next time, princess.” this time, the nickname goes straight to your pussy. it’s hard to cross your legs when you’re on your stomach and feeling delirious with the pleasure that came from the pressure of his slender fingers. 
unbeknownst you, your soft moans are slowly making their way down to gojo’s member, as he gets harder by the second. he doesn’t want to make it so obvious just yet – he’s just getting start after all. he can’t just blow his load this close into the session, but you’re sure as hell giving him a run for his money. 
“feel good?” you moan in response. gojo slowly inches his fingers down closer and closer to your ass, until it reaches the hem of your bathrobe covering it. “gonna move this down so i can do your legs, yeah?”
gojo will admit, he was a bit too excited to see your ass as he removed your bathrobe down before you could give a proper “yes” but it didn’t matter when you’re soft breaths were giving him the answer he needed. it takes everything in him to not knead the rounds of your perfect ass (he swears your cheeks were made for his hands) and move straight to your calves. 
he slowly massages the soles of your feet and calves with the oil as he moves closer to your thighs, all while relishing in your sweet moans. once he’s at your thighs, the real fun begins. gojo knows this routine like the back of his hands. 
you hear him sigh in confusion. “is everything okay?” you turn your head slightly to see him. 
“sorry about this princess, but you’re gonna have to spread your legs a little bit for me. it’s hard to get every inch of you warmed up, otherwise.”
you obey him almost too easily, and shift your thighs so that there’s more room for him to touch with his fingers. gojo’s hands reach up to slightly cup your ass, before his thumbs slowly slide into your inner thigh, lightly massaging you.
your breaths are getting shallower and louder, and you pray he doesn't go any closer to your pussy so he doesn’t see how soaked you are. you’ve never had a massage like this before, but you also don’t want him to stop. 
gojo’s fingers play with the space of your inner thigh before he spreads you apart, exposing you. you breath catches in your throat, and he performs the next part of his act. 
“we’ve got a pretty unconventional way of massaging our clients, princess.” you hear his voice straining. “gotta make sure you’re relaxed everywhere, but you gotta let me take care of you. think you can do that? all you have to do is relax, and let daddy do everything for you.” you can hear the lust dripping from his voice, but to be honest, you couldn’t give a shit at this point. 
“y-yeah, please, satoru, whatever you want. please, i just…i just feel so good right now,” you say, your eyes shut tight, and your hips practically squirming under his touch. you think you might go insane if he doesn’t touch you there in the next second. 
hook, line, and sinker. who’s gojo to deny your request? he graduated top of his class at his cosmetology and esthetician university, after all. his fingers glide almost too easily between your folds as he starts playing with your throbbing core. he can feel how needy your pussy is for his hands as he spreads your slick all over your core. 
the pleasure immediately gets caught in the pillow that muffles your moans. fuck, so this is what all the reviews were talking about. you feel his fingertips dancing around your clit and you want to shout at him to pay attention to it. 
“s-satoru~ p-please…i need you right there…” you say in between your moans. 
“where? here?” gojo’s finger taps your clit lightly, and it makes your entire body twitch with pleasure. he has to press down on the small of your back to keep you place as his fingers rub circles around your bundle of nerves, making you whimper. you unconsciously grind your hips against his fingers, trying to get close to your release. 
“need a better angle. face down, ass up.” gojo commands, and your body conforms to his words. you prop your lower body up with your knees while your face is sideways against the head of the massage table. he uses this now better angle to really rub his fingers into your folds and bundle of nerves, sending electricity throughout your body. you feel the dam building up inside you and threatening to break. 
“satoru~ i’m-i’m getting c-close…ah~” you hands grip on to the sides of the massage table as you brace for the earth shattering orgasm to rip through you, and with gojo’s deft fingers, you’re on cloud nine in no time. 
your body slumps back down and your eyes roll back as the vibrations of your release still radiate through your body. you hear  your pulse pumping through your head as you try to catch you breath, but you feel gojo’s now warm hands flip you on your back, and his face inches from yours. 
“you took that so well, princess. we’re not done, yet. there’s still another part of your body that needs to warm up.” you don’t have time to process what he means as he inserts two fingers into his mouth and then deep inside your entrance. your gasp is muffled by his mouth connecting to yours, hard, teeth and all. his fingers are long, and they easily find your sensitive g-spot as they curl upwards and bully your internal bundle of nerves. it’s quite embarrassing how quickly you’re ready for another release, and how hungry your entrance was for his finger, practically sucking them in and clenching around them immediately. 
“f-fuck~ i’m about to-” you don’t get to finish your sentence, as another orgasm rips through your body. gojo kisses you again to block your moans, and your hands wrap around his neck to pull him even closer to you. he playfully bites on your lower lip as you ride out your release on his fingers. 
gojo’s kisses turn into soft quick pecks as your breathing steadies and your eyes can focus again. “we’re not done yet,” he teases, slowly taking his slick coated fingers out of you. 
you don’t even have the energy to respond back as he flips you on you back. through heavy eyes, you look back up at him, biting back a moan as he restarts rubbing circles on your extremely sensitive clit. he needs to take off his shirt and fuck you already. 
“need something?” gojo teases, sensing your neediness from just your eyes. 
“take off your shirt, dumbass.” you say through gritted teeth. 
“try again.” he presses harder on your clit, and you let out an unsanctioned yelp through your teeth. 
“f-fuck~ please take off your shirt, dumbass.”
he smiles. “well, if you insist…” he rolls his eyes, feigning inconvenience, but the slowly growing tent in his pants says otherwise. gojo unbuttons his shirt, revealing a perfectly sculpted torso. now this is just unfair. 
“geez, my eyes are up here.” he teases, smirking at you as you quickly meet his eyes and feel your face flush. he unbuckles his belt and you slowly sit up from the massage table. you’re overcome with the urge to touch him, everywhere. you hook your finger to the belt loop of his pants and pull him closer to you. 
gojo smirks as he wraps his arms around hips and leans down to kiss you deeply. you feel your core ache for his touch again as his tongue explores your mouth again. you trace his perfectly sculpted torso, the indents of his abs slightly sweaty to your touch. your hands slowly make their way to the zipper of his slacks, but gojo immediately grabs your wrist to stop you from taking them fully off. 
“not just yet…” he murmurs in between kisses. while his lips are still locked on you, he slowly pushes your body back on the massage table and starts kissing down your bare stomach, the measly bathrobe long since discarded somewhere on the floor. gojo leaves small wet kisses along your body until he reaches your inner thighs. 
you suck in a breath as you involuntarily spread your legs for him, earning an enthusiastic hum from gojo, who’s still continuing to leave a trail of kisses that are inching closer and closer to where you need his mouth to be the most. “p-please~” you moan, your eyes closed in bliss. 
“please what, princess? use your words,” gojo coos, coming face to face with your soaking wet core. he blows on the sensitive bundle of nerves, causing your legs to twitch.
you can’t stand his fucking teasing but you need to be eaten out, so bad. “f-fuck y-you, gojo~” you say, pushing your core up to his face, trying to aim for his mouth before he easily pushes your hips back on the table. you hear him tsk in disapproval, and tears welling up in your eyes in desperation. “please, your tongue…inside me…please~” you whimper weakly. 
“since you begged so nicely…” gojo says before he immediately plunges his tongue inside you, almost making you scream. his tongue expertly explores your folds and sucks on your clit, making you inadvertently grind on his face. “y’taste so delicious, princess,” he says between licks as he eats you out like it’s the last pussy on earth. 
his ministrations with his tongue has you teetering on the edge in record time, and you’re threatening to spill within minutes of him eating you out. as the third wave of pleasure washes over you, you don’t have the energy in you to ask for permission as you feel your body tingle in the aftermath of it. you think you made a mess all over the massage table and gojo’s face, but you don’t have it in you to care as your eyes roll back. 
you feel gojo unbuckle his belt and take off his slack and underwear, exposing his hard member in his hands. you can see the precum leaking out the tip as you weakly lean on your elbows to prop yourself up. 
“see, princess, all those questions did have a reason after all…” he says in between breaths as he strokes himself, looking at your naked glistening body. you spread your legs further in anticipation of feeling him. “but there you were, being such a fuckin’ brat about answering them…” gojo says, eyebrows furrowing as he brings his tip closer to your core and you bite your lip in anticipation. 
“guess you better fuck the attitude outta me, then?” you say, looking up at him through heavy lidded eyes filled with mindless lust. you don’t even care about the consequences or who hears or even if you get your facial – you just need him. every part of your body craved him. 
gojo wastes no time at your suggestion, his tip entering you as you let out a lecherous moan. you feel the initial pain of his larger than average member tearing your tight entrance apart, and bite back a moan. gojo grits his teeth as he lets out a steady throaty groan. 
“fuck, princess. so fuckin’ tight. sure you’re not a virgin?” 
“s’too much satoru, y-you’re huge…ahh~” 
“too bad, princess.” he says, surprising you as he starts thrusting agonizingly slowly into you, bottoming out and effectively reaching the sensitive spot inside you. pain slowly turns into pleasure as you indulge in the feeling of your g-spot getting kissed by his member – the spot that you can never reach by yourself using your own fingers.  
“f-faster, please~” you urge gojo, and he obliges almost immediately, quickening his pace. he bullies your sloppy and wet core, as he watches your titties bounce with every thrust. unlike most people his age, it’s times like this where gojo realizes he really fucking loves his job. 
he reaches out and gives your titties a rough squeeze while he remains unrelenting in his pace. he feels your pussy clench around him, and he knows you’re close, and if he’s being honest, so is he. but he cannot cum just yet, and definitely not before you do. gojo abandons your titties and slides down his fingers to your clit as he starts rubbing inelegant circles around it, getting you closer and closer to the edge. 
you feel the dam breaking once again as the combination of him rubbing and fucking you comes to a climax. the orgasm travels to every corner of your body, as you see stars in your vision while gojo fucks your brains out. you hold on to his shoulders to steady yourself. based on how sloppily gojo is getting, you can tell he’s about to get close, too. you’re about to brace for him to finish inside you, when he abruptly pulls out, earning him a confused look from you. 
“lay down,” he commands more than asks, as he hastily pushes your chest down on the massage table. your sweaty skin sticks to the faux leather, but you don’t pay attention as he moves to the side of your face, holding his soaked member near it. 
gojo starts stroking his throbbing leaking member sensually, and you innately open your mouth and stick your tongue out. so this is the facial? the dots connected in your head at the same time gojo’s ropes of warm cum decorated your face – chin, cheeks, mouth, and all. you hear gojo’s throaty groans as he finishes on you and make sure not a single drop that gets on or near mouth gets wasted, swallowing pridefully. 
gojo leans closer to your ear as he catches his breath from his climax. “that’s the milkbomb facial,” he says cheekily, and you can’t help but giggle. you both take a couple more seconds to catch your breath. you watch gojo as he puts on his pants and tucks in his shirt, looking like he didn’t just fuck the shit out of you. he runs his fingers through his hair quickly as he goes to the counter and pulls out a warm eucalyptus towel as he takes his time to gently wipe your face and body. 
“that was fun,” you murmur, looking at the ceiling, finally understanding what the reviews you read about this earlier place meant. you definitely came here, multiple times in one day for sure. 
gojo chuckles as he goes over to wash his hands and you notice his forearms are glistening with your release. “that’s why we’re the best spa out here, princess.”
you notice your legs shaking slightly, but you manage to hop off the massage table, slightly dazed. gojo notices and helps you get on your feet and put on your clothes. the entire activity is soft and gentle compared to how he was just a couple minutes before. 
everything that you both have done in the past hour finally dawns on you, and you suddenly feel very shy despite whatever the contrary happened on the massage table. it’s so awkward now, like, what do you guys even talk about now? does he do this to everyone? is this their entire schtick?
“do you…do this with all your clients?” you whisper to him as you follow him out into the hallway to the exit. you cross your hands tightly to your chest, as if it’s shrouding you from other people finding out what happened in the room behind you. 
“ah, i’m not one to kiss and tell.” gojo puts his hands in his pockets and glances back at you, giving you a quick wink as you follow behind him, trying to keep up with him as he turns corners.s
“oh, so you do do this everyone, huh?” you challenge, your shyness slowly melting away with gojo’s playful tone.. 
“did you enjoy it?”
a pause from you.. “yes.”
“then don’t worry about it, kitten.” gojo pauses before he opens the door and turns to you. “listen, i wouldn’t mind if you came here again for the tokyo special, you know. i’ll even give you a discount, too.” he says earnestly. 
you let out a giggle. “oh? a discount?”
“yeah, the tight pussy discount.”
“shut up!” you say, and you playfully smack his shoulder, and you both laugh. 
“so… is that a yes? i’ll see you next week?” 
you bite your lip. “maybe, i dunno.” you give him a wink before opening the door, and you both know fully well that you’ll be back on the massage table again in no time with gojo pounding into you. 
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needless to say, gojo wasn’t lying when he said they were the best spa in town because by the time your sister’s wedding came around, your face was quite literally glowing. 
“wow! y/n – you’re just looking so radiant today! what’s your secret?” an auntie who’s name you cannot remember gleams, looking at you. 
you smirk, and try to hold back the heat from flushing your cheeks. “oh, just a really good facial,” you say. technically, you’re being honest, right?
“jesus, dude. is this all from skin care daddy?” nobara says, as the tenth person from the wedding compliments your skin. 
“you have no idea. they really know what they’re doing.” you say nonchalantly. you pull out your phone and text a recently saved number. 
you: got any slots for a tokyo special tomorrow?
within minutes you get a response: 
gojo: u know i do babygirl. btw a new guy just joined our spa. hope it’s cool sukuna joins to observe  😈
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jungkit · 7 months
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want you so
heeseung x f! reader genre: fluff warnings: none wc: 902
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Heeseung kept his eyes on you as you walked through the courtyard.
“Stare any longer, and your eyes are gonna fall out,” Jay says, munching on his Cheetos.
“I can't help it,” he replies, “she's just too beautiful.”
“You tell us daily, we get it,” Riki groans.
They just don't understand. To Heeseung, you're like a breath of fresh air. He loves everything about you. The way you smile, the way you laugh, how your nose scrunches when you’re concentrating on something.
Heeseung finds himself so infatuated, so in love with you.
When you call his name, it's like an angel is singing, and all you're doing is asking for a pencil.
He remembers when he first met you at freshman orientation. He was blown away.
Now, a year later, he still feels the same every time he sees you or when you approach him.
“I still don't get why you haven't confessed to her yet,” Sunoo says, and Heeseung finally takes his attention off you.
“I don't think she likes me like that,” he shrugs, “I’m okay with just admiring her from afar.”
His friends sigh, shaking their heads at his hopelessness.
“We should do something fun this weekend,” Sunghoon says, playing with his pencil in boredom.
“The fair is in town. What if we go?”Jungwon suggests.
Everyone looks at each other, silently agreeing.
On Saturday, Heeseung finds himself at the food stand, getting a corn dog.
Jake taps his shoulder, “Dude, look who’s here!”
He turns in the direction Jake is pointing to, eyes widening as they immediately find you.
“This could be your chance to talk to her!” Jake says eagerly.
All the boys are nudging him forward as he digs his heels into the ground.
“I don't think I can,” he says, voice whiny.
Protests come from behind him, “Come on!”
“Just do it!”
“What have you got to lose!”
“My dignity!” He argues, but they're getting closer to you.
Riki delivers a hard push, and before he knows it, he's falling right into you.
The boys quickly disperse, abandoning Heeseung and acting like they were never there.
Your frown soon becomes a smile as you recognize him, “Heeseung!”
“Hey, sorry about that. My friends were pushing me to go on this ride.”
You wave it off, “It’s okay! I'm glad to see you.”
You're glad to see him? Oh god, he can feel his heart beating faster.
“My friends kinda abandoned me. Maybe you could keep me company?” You ask, giving him a small smile.
This is your chance; don't slip up! He thinks to himself.
“I'd love to keep you company,” he says, giving you a smile of his own.
Suddenly, he’s being dragged by you all across the fair.
You take him to every game, and he does his best to impress you, ultimately failing.
“These games are rigged, you know?” He says as you laugh.
“Totally.”
When you pull him to the basketball game, he knows this is his chance. He has to do good.
And by god’s grace, he makes every basket, earning the top prize.
“What do you want?” He asks you, giggling on the inside when you look at him with wide eyes.
“You're letting me choose?”
“Of course, it's for you!”
You end up choosing the deer plushie.
“It reminds me of you. It has big, beautiful eyes.”
You say it casually, but Heeseung is stunned.
Big, beautiful eyes? Reminds you of him?
You purposefully chose a plushie that reminds you of him.
Before he can say something, you're pulling him in another direction.
When he looks up, he sees the love boat sign and almost collapses.
When it's your turn, he gets into the boat wordlessly.
He gulps as it starts moving, trailing into darkness.
It's quiet for a minute before you turn to him, speaking up.
“I wanted to bring you here for a reason,” you say.
Heeseung can feel himself start to sweat. Is it getting hotter?
“What is it?” he answers.
Your hand raises to cup his cheek, turning him to face you.
“I've liked you for a while now, Heeseung. I wanted to tell you sooner, but I was nervous. You don't know the effect you have on me. It’s like I can't think when you're around because my mind is just filled with thoughts of you: your smile, your laugh, your eyes. God, I love your eyes. You're so kind and gentle. I just want you so badly.”
Heeseung doesn't think he was breathing the moment you cupped his cheek, but he certainly wasn't breathing now, listening to your confession.
He doesn't know what to say or how to respond.
So he doesn't.
He surges forward, capturing your lips.
Your lips are soft and taste like strawberries.
You kiss back, sighing softly into the kiss.
Your lips move in unison, gentle but passionate.
It feels like it’s been hours when you eventually pull apart.
“You don't know how infatuated I've been with you since the day we met. You're everything to me, Y/N.”
You giggle, pulling him in for another kiss.
“You're mine now,” you say slyly, making Heeseung blush.
When the ride finally ends, you and Heeseung walk out hand in hand.
As they watch you, your friends, along with his, all high-five each other.
“Thank god that worked out,” Jay says, “watching them pine for each other was killing me.”
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t/n: just a little something to put out there!
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krakenartificer · 7 months
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Who wants a really sad Leverage headcanon?
Was re-watching the Gimme a K Street Job -- Season 5 Episode 5 -- and a couple of things stood out to me.
1) Nate says "Let's go steal some congresspeople", and then sends everyone on the team (except Parker, who's being a cheer coach) out to con one of their targets. But it feels like there's a profound mismatch in who gets which mark.
For the "not like other girls" feminist congresswoman who's inclined to dismiss cheer as worthless and demeaning, you need Eliot to come in looking like a man who very much knows what does and does not count as a sport, and be his tiny angry respect-women-juice self about how regardless of what you think of their choice of clothing they are working as hard as any other athlete and they deserve safety as much as anyone else. But instead they sent Hardison.
For the "Yes I am very busy and important; admire me" chairman, you need Sophie, who is better than anyone else on the planet at making you feel admirable when you're doing what she wants, and scummy and low when you're not doing what she wants. But instead they sent Eliot.
For the "Look I am trying, but I need corn subsidies or I won't be able to do anything else" newbie congressman, Hardison could happily have gone on an infinitely recurring series of fetch quests until he sees the place where they loop around and bottom out and every problem solves every other problem. But instead they sent Sophie.
2) Eliot struggles the most, so Nate works with him the most, but he doesn't help him out hardly at all; he just keeps saying, "So what's your next play?" and then revealing that he's already anticipated Eliot's next play and has all the materials in place to enact it. And of course, they do eventually get the dude on board, and it all works out, but afterwards, Eliot tells Nate, "I trust that some time soon you'll tell me why you had me slogging through all that when you already knew how to hook him."
And of course, knowing what we now know about how season 5 ends, it makes sense that Nate is trying to train the OT3 to work without him, looking for his replacement.
Except.
If the plan is to fuck off into the sunset with Sophie, then why did he throw Sophie into this uncomfortable not-my-wheelhouse scenario?
No, Nate's preparing the entire team to carry on without him. He's forcing them to learn how to plan, learn different ways of approaching problems, to think about bigger pictures and approach them strategically.
...
I think Nate just got the first diagnosis of the disease that's finally going to kill him. And again, we -- the audience -- now know that he's going to live for many years after that initial diagnosis. But he doesn't know that, at this point. He knows he's tested positive, and he knows it's eventually going to kill him, and he has no idea how long he has.
And in some sense, it doesn't matter how long he has. Three months or thirty years, that kind of revelation makes it stunningly clear that taking care of the people you love means making sure that they can take care of themselves.
So that's what he does: he throws them into new, uncomfortable situations where they'll have to grow and support each other without him, so that no matter what happens, they'll be able to keep going. Because he's not a nice person, Jimmy Ford's son, but by God does he know the importance of protecting your family.
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miaoua3 · 10 days
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Can we please get a Vernon head cannon… I struggle to find them on here but your svt ones are just amazing :))
hi! sure you can, and thank you so much for saying that, hope you enjoy this!
Vernon Boyfriend Headcanons:
•(sfw! hcs):
we all know that he is mostly silent throughout the day, but i truly believe that vernon would NOT be able to shut up with his significant other, he would be talking 24/7 to you, be prepared to hear about his day from the moment he woke up to the moment he came through the door of your apartment
throughout your relationship, you notice that your boyfriend has a problem. a very big and potentially dangerous problem. and that is that he brings all sorts of animals home. it started on one rainy night, he was supposed to be home 20 minutes ago but he was nowhere to be seen or heard. just as you were about to call him for the nth time, he came in through the door, drenched from head to toe from the heavy rain. and with three kittens in his arms. he didn’t even try to make any excuses, he just proceeded to say “i found them behind the dumpster two blocks away.”
we all know that he sleeps like a corpse, so naturally he wouldn’t cuddle you back while he’s asleep, but before that he definitely won’t let you out of his arms. he’s either talking your ear off or is casually scrolling through his phone. to be honest, it doesn’t matter what he’s doing, as long as you are in his arms he considers it time well spent. and just because he doesn’t cuddle you back during his sleep doesn’t mean you can’t do what you will lol, you can lie on him, hug him tightly and throw your leg over his stomach, he won’t care-but he also he won’t reciprocate it either because my man is just like this🧍
constantly shows you something on his phone, doesn’t matter what you are doing, you will just see his hand appear in front of your face before you even hear him say “babe look at this”, be it a meme or a cute cat video, he just wants you to see everything that he does too so you can enjoy it too
speaking off, kinda unpopular opinion but vernon definitely calls you babe or a nickname based on your name, i don’t really see him only calling you bro or dude like most claim he would do, i just don’t think he would go that overboard on cute nicknames either, but something small and cute just to signify both to himself and you, as well as to people around you that you two are together, and at the end of the day that would be a small way of him showing his love and affectionate for you
if you have a niece, count on vernon to ask you every other week with sparkly eyes if you can go and visit them, he just loves your niece so much even though he doesn’t really know how to play with her, he still loves her so much. even if he has to sit on a little pink chair with a tiara on his head while drinking ‘tea’ from a little pink cup, he doesn’t mind, as long as he gets to read her bed time stories when she goes to bed, he’s okay with it all❤️
i feel like everyone has already said this but vernon definitely has a big thing for showing you and sharing to you his love for music and movies. from making you new playlists with new songs he heard (and that remind him of you), to having a dedicated day of the week for movie nights, he just wants to have somebody that he can talk to about his favourite things so pls make sure to pay close attention to what he’s showing you :(
•(nsfw! hcs):
vernon strikes me as a man who wouldn’t have that high of a sex drive, but when he’s in a mood, count on the fact that you will be doing it for hours to no end and that you won’t be able to walk the next day. he will bend you in positions you didn’t even know you could be bent into, he will try out all the paces until he finds one that you enjoy the most that night. sex with vernon would never feel like chore but rather like a brand new and beautiful experience every single time
he actually gets really nervous before going on stage, so he always drags you into the nearest corner for a quickie or to eat you out or to have you suck his dick, for him it’s a great way to get all that pent up energy out (plus seeing you on your knees, with teary eyes as you struggle to wrap your mouth around his thick cock is something he can think about while on stage as a way to pass the time-)
if you ever thought that this man had a stone face and that he’s expressionless most of the time, that would change the very first time he fucked you-his eyebrows furrowed in pleasure, his mouth opened as moans keep on spilling from his mouth, droplets of sweat sliding down his temple, a few landing onto you due to him hovering above you-yeah, let’s just say that he makes the prettiest faces and noises ever
prefers it when you ride him, especially after a hard day at work, there’s nothing he loves more than leaning on the backrest of the couch and letting you take care of him, as well as letting your wet pussy swallow him whole, he would just lay there with his eyes closed and let you do whatever you think he would enjoy-sucking on his neck, scratching his chest with your nails, whispering sweet and encouraging words in his ears- let’s just say that this is top 3 best feelings he could ever feel
has a thing for both biting and being bitten, just something about the sensation you feel when you’re being bitten is so hot to him-imagine feeling so good and so much pleasure that the only thing to stop from screaming and letting the whole world know how good you’re feeling is to bite his shoulder, it makes his brain go ckslcnsnqjqh
for some reason finds himself always fucking you in the most unusual places-on top of the kitchen counter, in the bathtub, behind some restaurant that is secluded enough but also not enough, on dino’s couch??? when he wasn’t even in his apartment??? he just…fucks you when he gets in the mood, no matter the time, place or the occasion
you can’t even dare to say to me that he doesn’t have a thing for cream pies, just the sight of his cum dripping from inside you, your pussy clenching around nothing before he pushes his cock back inside along with the cum that was just about to drip out-let’s just say every thought from his head (if he had any left due to the feeling of your pussy clenching around his dick) evaporates, only thing he can focus on is you and how good his cum looks like coating your lower lips i- i need him i fear
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goose-duck · 3 months
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Creepypasta incorrect quotes ⭐
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Nina: spirit Halloween opened up early and my poor money decisions are always open so I bought a bunch of stuff
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Jeff: so...are we the best or the worst?
Toby: yes, sir.
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Jeff: he doesn't have eyeballs bro- he probably doesn't have balls either...
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Nina: he's ugly, I love him
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Y/N: There's just something abt his lack of a mouth and being less fluffy that makes me want him
Toby: he can't scream
Y/N: perfect
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Jeff: best friends!!
Y/N: nooOOOOO!!!!
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EJ: I learn from the mistakes of people who take my advice
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Y/N: heading into work~
*explosion*
Y/N: or maybe not-
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Nina: so romantic~
Jeff: *screaming*
Nina: romance <3
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Y/N: Jack, why am I in this room?
EJ: am I responsible for you moving from room to room now?
Y/N: yes.
EJ: then stay in that room.
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Toby: it's an elevator
Masky: this is a ladder, Toby.
Toby: imagination ✨
Hoodie: just because you put a sign that says "elevator" doesn't mean it's actually an elevator.
Toby: imagination ✨
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Y/N: but not me, because no one can get mad at me
Jane: I feel like in an hour we're all gonna be mad at you for something
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Toby: I made a house, what did you make?
Sally: a balloon
Toby: wonderful
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Jeff: just don't be blind
EJ: wow, you've cured me
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Toby: someone please take me off this fucking planet
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Y/N: Don't look at ceilings when ur tired. Never know what you'll see.
Toby: context, please
Y/N: Thought I had a fucking ceiling fan but it was just the balloons that I refuse to take down from my 13th birthday. I can't tell if I'm tired or stupid but I think either way it's correct.
Toby: it's probably both
Y/N: Exactly- It scared the shit outta me too-I saw it and was so fucking scared that I might have a ceiling fan in my room-
Toby: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA A FAN! ITS ON THE CEILING!!
Y/N: Y/N, Weakness: ceiling fans that may or may not be there
Toby: strength: walking in high heels, weakness: imaginary ceiling fans
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Hoodie: it's just a deer or something
Masky: bro, that is not a deer
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Jeff: *sees a spider* I should have just bombed the house the last time I saw one of you fuckers
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EJ: I'm doing good...im doing great...i have a headache.....
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Jeff: this is like when I threatened to steal your skin and bones and stuff
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Jeff: it's like if a heat stroke were a room
Y/N: me
Jeff: no, you're like if a heat stroke were a person
Y/N: oh
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Y/N: tree tops
Jeff: crispy
Nina: crispy tree tops?
Jane: why are they crispy?
EJ: why is everyone talking about trees??
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Jane: I'm moving the pumpkins, sorry, Toby
Toby: nooo, my life's work...
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Toby: would you be more offended if I got a mug of milk or orange juice?
Masky: milk.
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Jeff: they're all safety scissors, I don't think I can possibly be unsafe with them
*pile of about 10 safety scissors*
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LJ: I took some of his teeth and coloured them like candy corns
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Jeff: I'll steal ur hair, I'll take ur eyebrows and I'll steal ur skin too
Toby: please, that's all I have
Jeff: U have bones, mucles, veins, blood, cartilage and organs that I could take too
Toby: no thanks
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Hoodie: Masky is this big *puts his fingers together*
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Jeff: what are you doing dude?
Y/N: hugging? I think??
Jeff: it's weird...
Y/N: yeah, let's never do that again
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Y/N: die.
Toby: :0
Y/N: in a nice way..?
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Nina: I'm sure there's someone in Fabio who's named Russia
Jane: what?
Nina: yup.
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Jeff: I hit myself in the face with an eye!
EJ: give it to me!
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Ben: what the rational number?
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Toby: I think I failed at life...
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*Jeff and Toby leave the room*
Masky: well, that was a headache
Hoodie: which one?
EJ: both.
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*Jeff walks by*
Jane: look at him, he's greasy
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Y/N: why are you only offended when Jeff says something?
EJ: because it's Jeff
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Toby: well how's this right?
Jeff: because I'm here!
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Jane: I'm going to Halifax
Jeff: Hali-fuck you
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Sally: I saw a girl and she was young
Y/N: you're young
Sally: I'm 8
Y/N: exactly, young.
Sally: so you're a grandma?
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Toby: fellas, if you need me, I'll be living inside this cabinet
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Y/N: I'm afraid of togetherness
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𝓢𝔀𝓮𝓮𝓽 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓢𝓹𝓸𝓸𝓴𝔂 𝓗𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓹𝓻𝓸𝓶𝓹𝓽𝓼
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Hello and Welcome to Raven Cincaide's ' A Sweet and Spooky' Halloween & Love inspired prompts for Oktober 2024
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Day 1. First Kiss | Campus Crush | Costume Shopping 
Day 2. Cuddling | Best Friends | Halloween Decor  
Day 3. Distance | Ex- lover | Pumpkin Carving
Day 4. Lying | Rockstar | “What ARE You Wearing?” 
Day 5. Love Language | Plushies | Horror Movies
Day 6. Fight/Altercation | Newcomer | Corn Maze
Day 7. Compromise | Soul Mates| Halloween Party
Day 8. Forgiveness | Arranged Marriage | Farmers Market
Day 9. Praise | Status Gap | Pumpkin Spiced Latte 
Day 10. Little Touches | One Night Stand | Haunted House
Day 11. Lack Of Effort | Amnesia| Graveyard Dare
Day 12. Talking | Holiday Fling | Carnival
Day 13. Neglect | Forbidden Love | Ghosts
Day 14. Kisses | Trapped | Amusement Park
Day 15. Pressure | Enemies To Lovers | Black Cat
Day 16. Massage | Age Gap | Matching Costumes
Day 17. No reply | Second Chances | Halloween Candy
Day 18. Stepping Out | Oblivious Love | Nightmares
Day 19. Quality Time | Rivals | Trick Or Treat
Day 20. Nights out | Injury | Hunting Someone
Day 21. Anniversary | Rejected | Superstitions
Day 22. Teasing/Banter | Redemption | Horror Books
Day 23. Standoffishness | Different Worlds| Fears
Day 24. Hugs | Dude In Distress | Halloween Cooking
Day 25. Silence | Colleagues| Strange Noise
Day 26. Gifts | Sworn Off Relationships | Rituals
Day 27. Cute Nicknames | Jealousy | Halloween Night
Day 28. Physical Touch |Secret Identity | Ouija Board
Day 29. Little ‘Love you’s’ | Lost Heir| Summon a Demon
Day 30. Patting Back | Pen Pals | Cast a Curse
Day 31. Pick and Mix 
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I am so excited to share this list with you! It’s a mix of Love/ Angst, Common Romance Tropes and of course Halloween themes! These were originally created with SFW content in mind but it's easy to use them for some NSFW creations as well ;)
After all these are only suggestions but I hope they inspire you to create something this fall season. You’re more than welcome to share, move around or come up with your own prompts based on these. And of course you’re welcome to use the banner if you’d like :)
Also, if you do decide to create something based on these prompts, please tag me (here or @raven-cincaide) so I have a ton of goodies to read while under the blanket with my tea. 
So pick a day/ a prompt and lets get writing!
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nevermorgue · 26 days
Note
Okay but what about modern Amnabel's group food preferences?
cracks knuckles. Alright, let’s get into it.
Annabel Lee - complicated. Annabel likes to have the upper hand in every situation, even in casual afternoon lunch outings. She will adapt to almost anything put in front of her. For example, if she goes to someone’s house and they serve tea and scones, she will claim that they are her favorite. Are they? Who knows. She will play it as if whatever is given is something she enjoys immensely, creating the illusion that the world seems to cater to her- that she got lucky that it was her favorite meal. She does this ALL. THE. TIME. “Oh, they are serving pie. That is one of my favorites.” No it is not. She is just making it seem like it is to create the look that “Wow, how lucky for her. The world seems to love her- they’re serving her favorite food!” You get it? She says it’s her favorite for convenience sake. This is why Prospero brings her so many varied pastries when he can. He’s trying to figure out what she actually likes.
As for what she actually likes: She has a pretty varied palette. She does prefer food that is considered more “common” as it tends to have more flavor, and she absolutely loves American food far more than what she had at home. Is the type of person to eat popcorn one piece at a time, but then resorts to shoving 4-5 pieces in her mouth when she’s invested in whatever she’s doing.
Keeps up appearances by ordering what is expected of her. Teas, light foods with small portions.
- packs snacks throughout her school day like grapes or small cheese cubes. Dainty, barely filling little things.
- She loves spicy foods. Hot curries, salsas, she loooves the burn.
Ada - Also keeps up appearances, but obviously not the same way Annabel does. She will pretend to only like more expensive things, but she honestly thinks such things are too bland. She’s a southern girl used to flavor and savory dishes.
- LOVES cheap frozen dinners. She would rather die than admit this of course. Like think those frozen mac and cheeses you put in the microwave.
- She can and will force herself to eat something she doesn’t like, especially if Annabel/Prospero is eating it.
- Hates squid. Calamari? Yuck.
- She likes to comment on things she eats like she’s doing a shitty food review on Youtube. The only person that listens is Will, but you can’t really tell that he’s even paying attention.
- Loves celery
Prospero - This man has a sweet tooth, but he knows how to keep it tamed. He has a very balanced diet and makes sure to make every lunch or breakfast filling enough to last him through morning classes.
- Salad man. He will put so much shit into a salad. He’ll make days worth of salad and sometimes he and Annabel will just eat the whole thing in between classes.
- His favorite dressing is balsamic vinaigrette.
- Very rarely eats fried foods. Corn dogs are cool and he’s more likely to eat one of those rather than something else fried
- For snacking he always gets the things that are called “thins” or “light”, and he is very strict when it comes to the “no eating three hours before sleeping” rule.
- This man hates cashews
- I HC prospero as a mama’s boy idk i get the vibe. He grew up having homemade pasta and refuses to eat it if the restaurant isn’t like locally Italian.
Montresor - Big on steak. Big on potatoes. Big on veggies when they’re roasted or oven baked or anything where they’re mixed up and peppered and cooked. Dude will eat a raw carrot for fun though
- crunches loudly on chips. he does it on purpose.
- has a surprisingly shitty spice tolerance. It’s not BAD, but his face will get red and he tries to play it off.
- Likes messy finger foods like ribs
- Licorice kind of guy. specifically red.
- Prefers green apples over red ones
- really likes blue cheese, especially for his wings
- cannot STAND marzipan anything
Will - Peaches peaches peaches peaches pea-
- Prefers simpler foods. Basic ham and cheese sandwiches, a bag of chips…normal and boring.
- gets overwhelmed when served anything more complicated than what you’d get at an Applebees. He doesn’t really think he nor his body are suited to eat such things. They’re TOO delicious and he isn’t worth it.
- He loves cheesecake brownies. He’s literally only had them twice in his life but he would go insane if he ever saw any for sale anywhere
- The drinks he gets at coffee shops are considered “girly” to Montresor, so he only buys them when he’s alone. Like fruity refreshers and stuff.
- He would like a lot more food if he actively attempted to try new things, he just has no desire to treat himself.
- eats wheat thins for fun
- Only eats 1 singular fruit for breakfast or just skips it all together.
- would probably start crying if he ate a soup. it’s warm and filling and it makes him feel like a waste of space. the warmth settling in his stomach reminds him that he’s real and he hates it.
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jwirecs · 10 months
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RECOMMENDED SEVENTEEN FICS OF NOVEMBER 2023💖
hello, hello! here are my recs for seventeen for november! hopefully these beautiful stories get more recognition as well as the writers 💝
** anything in parentheses and bolded are my thoughts that can be disregarded if needed **
🔞smut || 💔angst || 💕fluff || ✅completed || 🔄ongoing || 💯favorite
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Loud Leather & Loud Thoughts || @bitchlessdino💕💔✅💯
↳ Hard to maintain a good acquaintanceship if it started off on the wrong foot, but Wonwoo tries to do just that, no matter how much you resent him from childhood. Now reunited as adults, you’re questioning whether your negative impression of him has stuck since being away or have you grown up just enough to realize how much between the two you have changed?. (bitchlessdino aint gon be bitchless no longer cause honey, i will be on my knees for your fics. biker!wonwoo is my new guilty pleasure.)
Too Much || @hannieehaee🔞💕✅💯💯
↳ after a few weeks of constant overtime work slouching over a desk, you feel as if your back is about to give out on you. fortunately for you, your best friend seungcheol is a professional masseuse! unfortunately for you, you're unsure of how you'll keep your crush on your best friend at bay while on his massage bed, ass up and oiled up. (the last time i had a massage, i swear i thought the masseuse broke my arm cause of a loud pop. scared me and the masseuse LMAO, but we okay. but can you imagine, cheols hands....im just gonna stop there. let the imagination run)
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Always Only You || @honeyhotteoks🔞💕💔✅💯💯💯
↳ the date was terrible, awful even, but you just can't call your brother to pick you up. you have to call his best friend instead. (brb imma need a hot minute to relive this fic. like no joke, my ass will be in the corning if you need me. bottom line, i absolutely loved this one)
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5 More Minutes || @qmrzi💕✅
↳ jihoon is working on a song before your date together and you got impatient. (he really would be the type to say 5 more minutes of work before a date. desperate times calls for desperate measures. i respect the oc's hustle.)
Bedroom Exclusive || @onlyhuis🔞💕💔✅💯
↳ seeing your boyfriend on tv kissing another girl definitely doesn't feel good, but he's got plenty of time to make it up to you. and he plans on letting you know that you're the only one on his mind. (AFTER THAT VID OF HIM IN THAT DRAMA WITH THAT ONE SCENE???? OHHHHHHHHHHHHH CHILD. another fic where i had to take a moment to breathe after i finished reading it. that says a whole lot my friends.)
Just The Tip || @euphor1a🔞💕💔✅💯💯
↳ he tried his best, he really did. but lord, for how long could he control himself when you looked like a pretty, little angel, all his to ruin? (you gotta give it to mingyu for resisting the urge throughout the story. flash a titty and this man will crumble to the ground. i love it.)
Now You're Safe With Me || @thedensworld💕💔✅💯
↳ Seungcheol received several missed calls from you, and he knew they weren't just regular phone calls. (stop this bby boy will drop heaven and earth to be with his boo. lets all pray that i get a man like him.)
Spotted: Woozi At Couples Therapy? || @mphountitled🔞💕💔✅
↳ A kink confession in couple's therapy might just save your relationship (i think its safe to say that this man is lowkey kinky af. lets be real. the dudes prob kinky.)
Sweet Home || @mangocustard16💕✅
↳ Mingyu returns home after a grueling practice to find you asleep on the couch, having waited for him despite his advice not to. He lifts you into his arms, shares a loving dinner, and the two of you cuddle in each other's embrace. (god soft mingyu is cute af. SOMEONE GET ME A MINGYU PLS)
To Be In Love || @daegutowns💕✅
↳ (a lil ol fic of oc's relationship with cheol. ngl oc is literally the mom of the group now. adopted 11 other children once they got with cheol. i love that for them)
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Bloodily Safe || @starlightxsvt🔞💕✅💯
↳ you have a little secret. one you are desperately hiding. yet the boy you have a crush on has figured it out. now a game of cat and mouse has begun. how do you make it out alive? (oooh child. this one. had me questioning what the heck do i read on here, but then again, i fully enjoyed it LMAO)
Clingy || @facioleeknow💕💔✅
↳ Anon Req: hi!! saw that you're taking request!! how about something like jeonghan get annoyed by the reader because he thinks reader is too clingy lately so he decided to put some distance, end up with something bad happens to reader and he regrets everything he did? angst to fluff pls thank u so much 😭🫶 (oooh mean jeonghan is lowkey my guilty pleasure. someone give me some more mean jeonghan which turns into fluff please.)
Creep || @smileysuh🔞✅💯💯💯
↳ “If the roles were reversed - if you were a ghost bound to this apartment forever - you’re saying you wouldn’t watch me get naked every day?” He’s definitely got a point. As your eyes skim Mingyu's perfect form again, that tingle returns between your legs. There’s no reason for him to be as sexy as he is- murders aren’t the only shocking thing this man has under his belt and you can see that now.  (ngl, i hope theres gonna be a second part just about how they would like overcome(????) the hardships(?????????) idk if those are the right words. but like how they would deal with one being a ghost and all that jazz. like down the line how will that work out. BUT other than that, i honestly love their fics to god.)
Driving Lessons For Dummies || @shuaflix🔞💕✅
↳ you've finally passed your written test and gotten your permit after six failed attempts. eager to get your license while attempting to avoid overpriced driving lessons, you enlist the help of kwon soonyoung, who only requires a STIIZY pod as payment. (lowkey got a fear of driving but thats something else LMAO. i respect all of the driving teachers, cause like they risking their life essentially, so i respect hoshi for risking his life with teaching the oc driving. goodluck to my future boo cause imma be the passenger princess in the relationship.)
In Between Notes || @som1ig💕💔✅
↳ after complaining for the hundredth time to your friends, you finally manage to take time to read a book unrelated to law studies. since you can’t borrow it, you decide to leave a note on the page where you left off with a comment. the next day, when you come back to reread it, you surprisingly find a note replacing yours. someone read the same book as you and answered you. then begin an epistolary exchange through notes and book, until it suddenly stops. and no, you won’t give up until you find who your correspondent was. (minghao is such a cutie, stop. connecting through notes through a book is adorable af. literally cinderella)
Love You Twice || @toruro🔞💕💔🔄
↳ in which your extremely hot and sexy one night stand turns out to be your son’s teacher. naturally, chaos ensues, but you might just find love as your life continues to take an unexpected turn. (teacher woo is satan. dont come for me but yall know this man probably has 0 patience. no scratch that, this man has too much patience. he will wait if he has to. step daddy woo. yes pls)
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Accidentally Ditching You On your Bday || @hannieehaee💔✅
↳ (title says it all. i love how i can just put myself in the oc's shoes and FEEL THE EMOTIONS. when you arent in a relationship, you through yourself in the oc shoes and live through them. that being said, them boys who "accidentally" ditch you on your birthday can choke on a piece of rice. with love.)
Petite S/O Trying to Kiss Them || @seokminded💕✅💯
↳ (its the hhu again - im short, most us females are short so we can highly relate to this struggle. LMAO)
Playfully Dodging Their Kisses || @mangocustard16💕✅💯
↳ (its the hhu but, do you hear their pouts??? you can literally hear their pouts. each any every one of them i swear to god.)
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Forgetting Your B-Day || @toruro💕💔✅
↳ (there isnt a summary but - 95 line forgetting your birthday. brb let me go quickly cry, as someone who doesnt really celebrate their birthday as like a big thing since we just aging, but this would hit me hard if i was in a relationship ngl.)
Do check out all of the other seventeen fics that i have reblogged as well!!
** if there is any fics that you guys would like to recommend, please do! i am slowly running out of fics to read **
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octuscle · 9 months
Note
i'm a skinny nerd from the northeast who goes to college in Kansas i'm about 5 foot 7 tall who was on my way to  the Chemistry Lab when a pair of big burly hands grabbed me , punched me in the gut. When i came to ,i was tied to a bench with rope in the male locker room. my legs were tied to a bar below the bench and my hands two the pegs above. my mouth was coved with duct tape with a mouthguard inside my mouth. i look down to see all my clothes were gone i was wearing only a jock strap . i have never worn a jockstrap before it was so uncomfortable .i look to see my red star trek t-shirt , my jeans, my sneakers and socks & my "geeky" white briefs were are cut up on the floor. i look up to see that i was surrounded by the hairiest, most manly, most self-centered, most muscled guys on campus : The college football team. the football team was wearing gray tank tops & crimson basketball shorts. the football players were who look like normal corn fed Kansas farm boys. they were at least 6 feet 3 inches tall in height and is broad-shouldered and muscular in build .they took off their tank tops i saw they all have 6 pack abs , substantial pecs and arms are also are broad-shouldered . they pull out a gym bag with my name on it with other pairs of boxers& jockstraps& clothes such as gym shorts, tank top including a red star trek tank top , sweats,  and a table right in front of me on that table was a football uniform, The helmet, cleats, jersey, and gear .they show me the jersey with my last name. they told me i was going to become a corn fed Kansas farm boy like them i will still be a geek. they told me all the guys on campus in town even the nerds on this small Kansas college campus has a 6 pack, substantial pecs and arms& are also broad-shouldered cause even the nerds work on farms & have to join the football team & get modeling gigs so they pay for college. when they put the football uniform on me turning from a skinny geek into a geeky Kansas farm boy.
Dude, I'm sorry, but sometimes it really pays to read the fine print. Your college has a partnership with us. When you enroll, you agree to undergo a Chronivac transformation if needed. And there is no need to justify the need. The mere fact that your upper arms are too small is sufficient. So welcome to Kansas, farm boy, I'm activating your jockstraps now, let the transformation begin!
Your body starts to tremble. Your hips shake. And your cock gets rock hard. The jockstrap fits your narrow hips and tight ass like a glove. A glove that is quickly soaked in precum while the twitches spread from your cock in all directions. Your thighs become powerful and hard as boards, your belly flattens and with every twitch your six pack becomes more and more prominent. At first you react in horror. But you enjoy it more and more. You would love to jerk off. But you have no control over your arms. Instead, your growing pecs start to dance. Your calves turn into real diamonds. And then the twitches reach your neck. It quickly becomes wider than your head. Your Adam's apple protrudes prominently, your moans become deeper and deeper. And as your facial features become more and more angular and masculine, your bulging muscles spread across your shoulders towards your hands.
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Bruh, that was two weeks ago now. You have quickly become accustomed to your body. The only thing that bothers you is your smooth skin. But your body hair is already starting to grow. Soon you will be in no way inferior to your bruhs. Your brain and your cock are in a constant battle to see who controls you. But you are and always will be a geek. Your brain usually wins. But mercy on the ass you fuck if your cock wins.
You're still the same in your mind. Okay, you don't remember going to the philharmonic or art museums in your youth. You played football with your buddies and cleaned your old man's stable. But you're a geek and your goal is to get a good college degree. Even without a football scholarship. Although I'm sure you'd get it. Enjoy it, geek! There are worse things than growing up to be a really big boy in Kansas.
Pic found @backwardsnapback
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cocogum · 5 months
Text
The Great Wave - Chapter 1 Review
‼️ SPOILERS FOR THE CHAPTER ‼️
Warning(s): mature themes, descriptive language, proceed with caution.
Before I start, I'd like to say that I initially added a lot more to this, but since tumblr had to censor it, I had to level it down a little...
I guess I just got carried away with it because of yumalia lol
So yeah...hope tumblr doesn't flag this again....
Alright everyone you know the drill.
LET’S ALL GET IT OUT OF OUR SYSTEMS AND GO CRAZY OVER HOW THESE TWO FUCKED SO MANY TIMES‼️‼️‼️‼️
Good job you two honestly I’m so happy these two got to have fun together like this 🥰🥰
Like no joke the first time I started to read the first chapter, of all the ways I thought it would start, I DIDN’T THINK THEY’D BE FUCKING I legit thought I was interrupting them my god-
I was so SHOCKED wtf??????!!!!
Like yes but what????
Ankama wasn’t kidding when they said they’d go mature mode and INSTANTLY cram in adult themes. The unexpected (but still warned) change was so sudden that that’s how you know Ankama has been keeping themselves tamed in the seasons because they couldn’t pull this shit off so easily like Japan.
Now let’s analyze the first thing that’s in the very first chapter.
The s** 👹👹
Okay I know how laughably this sounds because the FIRST THING in the first volume that we get to see is Yugo and Amalia’s private time.
And I’m not ashamed of loving it. Even now I still can’t believe that this can literally be considered soft corn. I won’t be surprised if more than half of the chapter ended up on that infamous site 💀(if u know, u know)
By the way I love how Amalia’s hair grew cuz I was starting to get sick of seeing her with a short ponytail all the time AND I LOVE HOW WE FINALLY SEE HER UNTYING HER HAIR CUZ MAN ITS BEEN SO LONG SINCE IVE SEEN HER LET HER HAIR OUT
But their private moment(s) really made us understand just how much they care for one another. The way that they are sleeping together NAKED like this so comfortably too confirms that they have done these kinds of activities before.
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The ambiance and the colors truly encapsulate the tranquility and peacefulness they both share in this moment. You can even feel the sunshine’s rays touching your skin.
AND I’M ALL HERE FOR IT. They genuinely look so cute and in love together like that I just wanna tear that blanket away and dhskdkfkksskskkdksksd.
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If anyone is wondering why Yugo still keeps the dofus on him, it’s because the dragon, Rodalström, that Armand defeated is still alive. A necrome can never truly die so Yugo has to essentially keep the dofus on him at all times just in case the dragon would set free someday (i feel so bad for Qilby due to this decision…dude is the only one between his siblings who can hear these two banging💀)
While looking through these same pages over and over again (I still haven’t stopped), I began to seriously wonder what kind of positions they would do together.
We’ve seen two particular positions they have used in this chapter and it was the “lotus” position and the “woman on top” position.
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These are very accurate positions for these two mainly because of the level of intimacy it provides. It’s not rough, extravagant, or even too lewd. It’s simply just right.
They are so intimate with one another that they even hug while keeping the pace. And I think it is wonderful to see these two just being happy and satisfied in each other’s arms like this.
It's such a sweet moment for these two that you really can't look away (i'm definitely not saying this to justify why I keep overfixating these panels). You can even see Yugo choosing to keep his eyes open during it all just to look at Amalia enjoying it.
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My guy clearly loves the view please!! 😫😫😫
You don't think seeing her liking it makes him even more excited righ-
Some parts during their intimate moment had their arms, which were groping A LOT of things, somewhat censored by the blankets they still had on each other. So, to have a clearer view of what happened under the sheets, I decided to outline their covered arms to give you an idea of where those hands went.
At the very beginning, Yugo is woken up by Amalia kissing his cheek. But after that, his body looks much more awake when we see a panel of Amalia's hand under the covers reaching for something. This immediately makes Yugo wide awake, to the point where he's already sweating a bit and blushing very hard as he says, "You're...tireless!"
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After some outlining made by yours truly, it was painfully obvious where Amalia was reaching for and- DEBHUHUFUWHYUHFUYHUWUEFHUWHFUEFHUEWH
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GURL STOP OMG SHE'S TOO BOLD I CAN'T WITH HER I LOVE HER OMG SHE KNOWS WHERE TO REACH YES DO IT WAKE HIM UP!!!!
The fact that she instantly knew what to do when she wasn't getting enough attention from him after that cheek kiss alone sends me 😭😭
But it's not like Yugo's the innocent one here for not trying anything. On the contrary, HE'S TOUCHING HER TOO.
THAT GUY KNOWS WHAT'S BEST TO GRAB.
He's a man after all, so what'd you expect lol
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He KNOWS that her ass is THICK, SO WHY WOULD HE NOT TOUCH ONE OF HER BEST ASSETS!?!?!?
You can tell these two obviously do more than just two “sleeping” positions, but since they were messing around in the morning, I can give them a pass for being sweet and tender with each other at this moment, just this once. They must've done A LOT more yesterday night since Yugo did say she was tireless as soon as he woke up. These two are adventurers at heart, so why wouldn't they explore each other more thoroughly-
Given that we’ve only seen the "lotus," the "woman on top," and a simple embrace, I would like to suggest a few more positions that would suit them well. These recommended positions are so accurate to them and reflect their dynamic that I wouldn’t be surprised if they have done these before (or will eventually 👀).
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While nitpicking every single panel of their “morning routine” I learned two things thanks to this start:
1) Yugo’s a bottom but is able to switch.
2) Amalia is insatiable in bed. Girl is hungry HUNGRY. Because judging from how Yugo and her were fully naked and laying in bed in the beginning, that means they had finished screwing with each other a while ago BEFORE AMALIA JUST JUMPS BACK INTO IT. SHE’S LITERALLY TIRING OUT A DEMIGOD ALIEN JUST FROM GROPING AND TAKING HIM-
If a scene like this wasn’t what I thought would happen at the beginning of the first chapter, then Amalia getting choked to death had definitely thrown me off guard. Like many other readers, I already knew that this wasn’t actually real and was only happening in Yugo’s head but it still felt very off-putting to see her struggling to breathe. The way Yugo panicked and tried to help only for him to scream and cry when he realized she was on the verge of dying was powerful.
And that’s when we find the anomaly in this chapter.
The dragon that appeared in Yugo’s head.
I initially expected Toross to be the one tormenting Yugo but I guess it ended up being this dragon.
The dragon figure seems to feel severe hatred for Yugo for all the calamities he let happen in the World of Twelve and how he seems to be living a good life at the moment while having the six primordial eliatrope Dofus and the Eliasphere in his possession.
The theories immediately started flooding in on who this dragon could possibly be and here’s what people came up with:
A) The dragon is one of the six primordial dragons from the World of Twelve named Grougalorasalar.
He’s the guardian of the Eben dofus and used to have been sealed in Joris during the Dofus era. Some have theorized this dragon to be him because of how physically similar they look.
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Although he looks identical, there is no logical reasoning to support his hostility towards Yugo, let alone his ability to infiltrate his mind. Furthermore, the way he acts and thinks around Yugo, assuming it is actually him, is illogical given his involvement in Ogrest's rampage.
B) This dragon is, in actuality, Draconiros, the dragon of dreams.
His job is to govern the dreams and nightmares of the twelvians. People suspect he might have taken the form of Grougalorasalar while talking to Yugo.
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Despite never meeting Yugo, he could have watched over the twelvians through their dreams. This means that he might have seen Oropo's dreams, as well as Yugo's own, giving him insight into Yugo's future actions and indirectly caused consequences. If true, this theory would explain why he holds a grudge against Yugo. It currently stands as the most compelling theory among all others.
C) The Great Dragon. Yugo’s father could be the one able to invade his mind and blame him for all sorts of things.
It's hard to ignore the fact that the Great Dragon appears to have been absent during some of the biggest catastrophes in the Krosmoz. Despite countless calamities happening all around the world, the Great Dragon seemed to have done nothing to prevent them, nor did he even show up to witness them. This is why his presence felt non-existent in the world. If he doesn't care about the world, why would he have any interest in what Yugo has done?
D) Osamodas himself could be the one speaking to Yugo while taking the form of Grougalorasalar.
It's worth considering that Yugo may face blame from the god of beasts. Additionally, it's intriguing to note that the osamodas race will play a significant role later on. This is evident from Aurora and her family's return to the Sadida kingdom.
So far, these are the only theories out there that we have for this dragon. That, and the fact that it might as well be a whole new character that we haven’t seen before.
The thing that truly makes this interaction between Yugo and the unknown dragon feel severe is the fact that the dragon tells him that despite sharing dragon blood, he truly detests him.
Imagine having to know that a millennial dragon hates you despite sharing the same blood.
Of course, the interaction couldn’t have stayed for very long because Amalia immediately interrupted it by screaming Yugo’s name. Yugo looks completely out of it, huddled up and shaking in fear. I understand that he saw what could be a future threat but this whole situation must’ve looked so off-putting from Amalia’s perspective: they were fucking, they started levitating because of the six eliatrope Dofus residing in him, and then they both suddenly fell on the floor and she saw Yugo curled up and crying, freaking the fuck out.
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Amalia doesn’t understand but she still goes to him and immediately tries to calm him down by embracing him. But despite everything he’s seen and the fact that he interacted with a mysterious dangerous beast, the first thing that Yugo says amidst his crying is: “I thought I lost you…”
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Look at the sheer terror in his eyes.
He genuinely looks like he thought he lost everything at this very moment. His body is shaking and is still processing what he just saw and heard.
He even APOLOGIZES to her, thinking that seeing her dying in his arms was somehow his fault.
Her life is such a huge priority for him that that’s immediately the first thing he’s afraid he’ll lose the most.
That’s when Amalia suddenly says the words: “Calm down, it was just a dream.”
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A dream??
You mean to tell me that this whole time, Yugo was sleeping?
So this whole “wrestling” scene never happened?
I believe there’s been some kind of misunderstanding when we first read this chapter.
I feel like we thought Yugo and Amalia had been messing with each other in the morning and that’s when Yugo suddenly received a flash of imagery and words from the unknown dragon before Amalia snapped him out of it and that’s how they ended up on the floor together.
But it turns out that wasn’t technically what happened.
Because if this intimate scene was real, then why would Amalia say he had dreamt?
I believe this is what actually happened:
Yugo and Amalia were peacefully sleeping together after spending the night awake (because what do you think a fully naked couple does in bed). When morning arose, that’s when Yugo started having a wet dream of Amalia and him getting in on again and right when things were starting to get better for Yugo, the dream started to twist itself and change out of its own will, forcing the one good thing about the dream to leave, which was Amalia, by making her choke to death to finally reveal the dragon. The dragon haunts his mind and spills his hateful thoughts to the eliatrope causing him to suffer alone until Amalia snaps him awake and manages to unknowingly free him from the torment. Yugo must’ve fallen on the floor while having the nightmare and Amalia simply got down from the bed to wake him up.
(this still doesn’t change the things I said about the types of positions they have, how Amalia has her own nicknames for Yugo like ‘little princess’, and how Amalia is in bed though because dreams often depict and copy real-life behaviors from the mind of the person dreaming. it’s actually funny that Yugo had a WET DREAM about Amalia and him. despite getting so much action with her, his mind doesn’t leave her alone lol)
When she regards his shaking form that it was only a dream, however, Yugo insists how real it felt. That’s when he decides to stand up and claim he needs some air to think. The fact that he has said the same thing back in Season 4 Episode 1 when he had Oropo in his head, shows how his insistence of wanting to be alone after getting scarred, has become a pattern.
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Amalia understandably (and predictably) gets angry at Yugo for leaving but her behavior also raises a few questions. Does this mean she’s angry that he wants to be alone every time he gets nightmares? Does he receive incessant nightmares on some nights? If that’s the case, then how often does this keep occurring? Or is this the first time he does this? Is she angry because he tends to quickly leave when he thinks he needs to deal with something on his own like how he did in Seasons 2 and 4?
Regardless of what the case may be, Amalia doesn’t waste time and immediately dresses herself up with her vines like a boss ass Queen just look at how refined and elegant she looks while changing✨✨ I love her so much 💕💕
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Also vinillain noticed how these two dumbasses don’t HAVE ANY BEDROOM DOORS. How do they actually get any privacy if their bedroom has a huge ass hole with no door?? It’s so bare that it doesn’t even have a curtain to cover the front of their room!! Like did these two not realize that literally anyone can just get right in their room? I get that they’re royals so they would know that no one would be this dumb enough to simply get in like that but the entrance of the room is so big and wide that anyone can just pass through it and be able to see their bed from where they’re standing!! You can even see the bed frame right there in just that panel for crying out loud!! I get that the sadidas are a pretty open race BUT THEY’RE NOT THAT OPEN TO EACH OTHER-
Besides this stupid choice of not having any doors, I love how the kingdom made a few adjustments to the throne room because they initially only had one seat. Even when Armand was king, there was still one place. Aurora had to sit in a small space next to him lol. Note that Aurora used to sit on the right side like how Yugo has to do now.
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I already talked about this to vinillain but I told them that because of how the throne was arranged when it got split into two, I feel like the ones who sit on the right are the ones who come from other kingdoms aka if they’re from another race. I believe that the reason why the throne had only been one seat in Seasons 1, 2, and the ovas, was because the only ruler at the time was King Oakheart. The ruling seat might have also been divided in two when the queen was still alive. Amalia might as well have simply chosen to sit in Armand’s place because it used to be his which would be cute if that was the case.
I like to think that Yugo deserves sitting in Aurora’s place because he’s submissive-
Speaking of Armand, the mural wall that Amalia made the artist make was such a wonderful decision. She really did love her brother despite the many quarrels they used to have.
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This man entered the legend ❤️
After the interaction between Amalia and the painter, I noticed the royal advisor (or so I think) about to approach Amalia with something to discuss. Despite not having entered the throne room yet to listen to her people's grievances, the advisor seems to have something confidential to share with her, as he didn't choose to wait until she got there. Although we don't know what that "something" could be, Amalia immediately stops him, explaining that she just got out of bed and needs time to process everything.
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I think we'll see what that 'something' could be about in the next chapter, though. Looking at the crowd awaiting Yugo and Amalia in the throne room to discuss their business with them, I have a strong feeling some of those problems would involve the elite eliatropes.
We can even see how the mood in the throne room looked very tense between the sadidas and the eliatropes. Some of the sadidas looked perturbed, and there's a good chance they're acting this way because of the eliatropes. Not only that, but the eliatrope kids looked super uncomfortable because of the tension going on. Even a sadida was eyeing an eliatrope in a pretty judgemental way (you can see it on the right panel).
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They were all waiting for Amalia and Yugo so they could speak about their problems to the two royals so I wouldn't be surprised if some problems would be about the eliatropes staying.
I understand that when we last saw the sadidas, they were pretty much okay fighting alongside the eliatropes during the war against the necromes. But that was because it was a war. They were extremely short-handed, so they were perfectly fine with having them by their side. But now that the war is over, it's possible that many of them feel a bit awkward having to share their lands with eliatropes. Imagine living on these lands since the dawn of time and you suddenly have to live with people who are not even from your planet one day.
In short, Yugo and Amalia should get more intimate moments, the dragon in the dream has a good chance of being Draconiros, Yugo should stop dealing with his problems on his own, Armand is a chad, the two royal seats scream power couple goals, I need that sadida and eliatrope drama, and I’m waiting on what the advisor has to say.
@geekgirles @onyichii
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