#i love this funny little guy he’s so interesting

[cottonlemonade]

Mr Steal Your Girl

word count: 1311 || avg. reading time: 6 mins.

pairing: post-time skip!Kenma x chubby!Reader

genre: fluff, University

warnings: spoilers

synopsis: Kenma tries to ask you out but has awful timing

It was already hard enough to dress for a normal date but finding an outfit for a blind date you didn’t want to go to to begin with was impossible.

Your best friend was annoyed that she couldn’t take you and your chronically single self on any double dates and so decided to take matters into her own hands. At least once every few months she would close her eyes and pick a random guy walking around the campus cafeteria and ask if he was interested in a “cool, funny, smart girl that was just too shy to ask herself” and most of the time that was enough. The date was set, your friend dragged you along and you had a miserable two hours before being allowed to return to your natural habitat - your dorm room.

In her defense, most guys she selected were actually very nice. And except for the last one who had forgotten his wallet, then ate his weight in burgers, let you pay, and had since vanished without a trace or payback, they all knew how to behave. They kept the conversations going, complimented you, and usually asked for a second date, but you liked being alone and besides, dating was stressful. Who needed the whole hassle of getting dressed up and leaving the house? You wanted someone who liked to spend their time indoors, watch movies, play games, build a Lego set or two, snuggle, and snack.

Kenma was convinced that you were perfect for him. Witty, had excellent taste in games and music, and a figure that put every body pillow he ever received as a promo gift to shame. He spent the better part of any lecture twirling his pen in his long fingers and staring at the back of your head, then quickly snapping his eyes the other way, pretending to look intently at the monitor upfront if you happened to turn around during a stretch. He remembered overhearing one of his former classmates once saying that asking someone out was easy, but now that Kenma absently drew a heart with your initials on the side of his notes, he found he didn’t share that sentiment. Partly because he didn’t like to go out in the first place, so how would he convincingly invite someone to something he didn’t even want to go to either?

None of his friends knew about his crush on you and he wasn’t going to admit it to them. Not because he would be embarrassed if they knew, but because he didn’t want to be grouped together with your small and not-so-secret on-campus fan club - a bunch of desperate boys who all wanted a piece of the chubby queen of homebodies. So he denied any allegations that quickening his sluggish steps on the way to the lecture hall to sit in your vicinity, his sleep-deprived heart eyes and doodle-adorned notepads meant anything. Pondering, he tapped the tip of his pen onto the paper, trying to figure out a way to invite you to play games with him, romantically. He wasn‘t going to stoop as low as to ask Kuroo for help and instead took to the wild seas of the internet for advice.

As he scrolled through the many many forums, sifting through mostly bad ideas, he overheard one of your friends say, “It‘s just dinner and a movie. Give him a chance. He is the captain of the swim team after all.“

Kenma‘s heart sank - and then bounced back up immediately when you groaned.

“Look, it‘s sweet and … a little concerning how much you care about my love life, but I‘m not interested in him. Or anyone really. I just prefer to be alone.“

100% understanding and agreeing with you, Kenma chewed the inside of his cheek, thinking if it would come across as weird and creepy if he were to ask you to be alone together.

“But I worry about you.“, the friend pouted.

You laughed and gently put a hand on her shoulder, “Not everyone meets the love of their life at university.“

In truth, you just didn‘t want your friend to know about your ridiculous crush on Kodzuken. Your heart had almost jumped out of your chest when you first spotted the tell-tale half-dyed ponytail in your class and heard the all too familiar voice during a presentation project. It was silly, really, and you did well pushing your infatuation to the very back of your mind.

After all, whenever you tried to catch a glimpse of him he would look away immediately, making it all too clear that wasn‘t interested in a conversation.

It was no use either way. Your friend wouldn‘t stop pushing until you were social for an evening so you chose your usual - well fitted jeans and a thin, long sleeved sweater to keep the cold and any potential bodily contact to a minimum. Your friend waved when she recognized you getting off the bus. She was already waiting in the arms of her boyfriend with a tower of a guy right next to them, who, when seeing who his set-up was going to be, looked a little disappointed. Oh great.

Kenma felt more pathetic by the second. All day he had tried to work up the courage to catch you in a calm minute to ask you out before your date. If it went well with that guy, chances were he wouldn’t ever let you go (if he knew what was best for him), so this was basically his last opportunity ever. When he didn’t manage to ask during class, then neither during lunch, nor in the library he never went to before, and neither at the bus stop, he thought he might as well face the fact that it wasn’t meant to be. But he found himself a few hours later behind you in the queue at the movie theater, he heard you were planning to go to. He would have to ask now before he’d have to buy a ticket. As he politely waited for a lull in the conversation between you and the Iron Man your friend set you up with, Kenma tried to busy himself with a game on his phone to calm his nerves. But he became so engrossed in a level that he missed his chance and could only watch you walk away with your friends. He should just give up. This was ludicrous.

“One ticket to whatever movie they just went to.”, he said before he could stop himself.

Just turn around. Turn around and leave. Come on.

But his feet had other plans. With the overpriced movie stub in hand, he shuffled to the auditorium and searched in the crowd for you. Unfortunately, the first marker he found was the tall guy next to you, talking to your friend and boyfriend, leaving you to sit quietly and awkwardly to the side.

He walked up the steps and your eyes met. Your cheeks blushed, as did his, and with the confidence of a deflated balloon, he came to a halt next to you, hands in his pockets.

“Hey y/n, I’m Kenma. I’m in your business class.”

“I know.”, you said and he was already relieved. First hurdle down. Now, carefully…

“Do you wanna go to a gaming café together?”

“Wha- right now?”

“I mean, yeah, if you don’t have anything else going on.”, he looked past you to the guy who just stared at him in disbelief and added in appeasement of your date, “Nothing personal.”

You exchanged a look with your friend who was just as shocked as the others and she shrugged. You turned back to Kenma.

“Sure thing.”

He held out his hand, then felt silly doing so and was about to lower it when you grabbed it.

“Lead the way.”, you said brightly and he did.

[pomefioredove]

helloo! ^^ can I req hcs of dorm leaders + Rollo and neige with a fencer reader? If it's okay with you, ofc!! I really enjoy and love your writing 🫶

ofc and thank you! ^-^

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ fencer reader

type of post: headcanons characters: riddle, leona, azul, kalim, vil, neige, idia, malleus, rollo additional info: romantic or platonic, reader is gender neutral, reader is not specified to be yuu, short

Riddle would be into it. he goes on and on about what a dignified choice of sport that is, how he's always wanted to try it, on and onnn. I just think he's really into swords. he'll ask to watch you practice, all giddy and cute. the guy is genuinely fangirling

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Leona is like... okayyy. and? you can play with sharp objects? he grew up in a palace surrounded by guards and nobility, he probably had his first sword when he was three

defo challenges you to a duel because he thinks it would be funny. and he WINS

(then he buys you whatever you want as a consolation prize bc he's soft for you)

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

[Azul voice] please no weapons or magic in the lounge

...you'll have to demonstrate for the (very eager and interested) tweels outside from now on

Azul will, of course, come to watch. he'd be interested in anything you do, really, because it's you. and watching you try to tell the tweels they can't really kill each other with these kinds of swords is amusing

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Kalim is somehow 100% convinced he can teach himself how to fence within in a week. he thinks you're that cool, and, sevens does he want to play with swords. he probably has a lot of them, too, which Jamil very strongly advises him not to touch (because he has little regard for himself or his surroundings).

Kalim will let you take as many as you want when you come over. he does not know that these aren't the swords you use in fencing

still... um, it's the thought that counts, right?

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

like with any sport, Vil can respect your dedication to your passion. and you have really good posture. he would get Epel to join you, but the thought of that boy with access to weapons of any kind, safe or not... yeah

he's nowhere near your level, of course, but he's always happy to help you with any aches or pains from bouts. in return, you can help him rehearse for roles that require swordsmanship. fair enough

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

the Neige Leblanche, swooning? yes, actually!! I can't overstate how much of a sucker he is for the whole... dashing and chivalrous thing. it's the sword, yes, but it's also the outfit, the rules, the way you're so... charming. you could pull him 100%

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Idia is a simple man. he sees someone being really good at a niche sport he knows from his fav manga and anime, and he absolutely trips over himself. literally head over heels. blushing, giggling, et cetera, he's just such a freak about this sort of thing (affectionately)

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

ah, Malleus. if anyone here can appreciate swordsmanship in all its forms, it's him. with his royal guard and his knights and his freaky gothic castle...

he'll probably invite you to fence with him, and he completely wipes the floor with you (this is Malleus Draconia we're talking about, after all). but lovingly!

he's having the time of his life :)

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

wakey wakey Rollo fans

to be engaged in a non-magical activity, based on agility, wit, and, arguably intelligence, in which there is form and order and rules...

of course, you have his full support

he somehow shows up at all your bouts, is with you before and after practice, and takes his duties as your companion very, very seriously

[heytherecentaurs]

Everyone is crushing this show. It's even better than the first one.

Murph playing both Barry and Kugrash is great. Barry is truly having a moment. Murph flexing changed the fabric of the universe. The fact that he transitions from himbo to smart rat – THE RANGE.

Siobhan's first time as Rowan had her so over everything happening; this time she's a little more open to things but still calling out all the fairy tale bullshit. Very funny. Could be interesting if this is actually Rowan's first time in a quangle and some vague idea of it happening in episode 1 is why she's so over it.

Ally as Margaret is always incredible. Marge is always a little horny and somehow both competent and a disaster. They really rely on Marge's abilities because she's not a character optimized for combat. But it works for them.

Zac remains a king of oneliners. And the fact Gorgug is the one trying to keep things on the rails as a teenager is hilarious. He's an amazing Bad Kid to have alone. I love that the Fantasy High kid knows what the quangle is. Really good stuff. Also, "If I leave you with anything, it's this—those guys are not my friends." HA!

Emily really shines in the live shows, brings a ton of energy and seems to have an innate sense of structure that ties the chaos together. The whole bit about it being live theatre was amazing.

Brennan is a nasty lil freak.

[taihua]

thoughts on peixin? 👀

Took me forever to get to this one because apparently I have a lot of thoughts on peixin and needed to type them out on my laptop rather than on mobile!

I'll start with my boring "what fits with canon" answer: obviously it's a non-canon ship, but I generally don't think Pei Ming and Feng Xin are very close or spend a lot of time around each other. Feng Xin is a known loner who doesn't spend time in heaven, and Pei Ming is busy seducing women (I think he's arguably bisexual in theory but in practice he just likes women too much to bother seducing men). There isn't even really any overlap in their territories to justify the idea of them helping each other, since Lang Qianqiu's in the middle. One of my favorite throwaway lines is Nan Feng calling the Peis "weirdos" in Book 1. Fanon overestimates how close they are by consistently having them be friends or hang out regularly.

Having said all of that... TGCF is the "side characters only exist to prop up Hualian" book, so there could have been a lot of interesting interactions between them if she took the time to actually work on Feng Xin's character and I am mad about the missed opportunities :(

I love the "God of Love who has a lot of casual sex" paired up with the "God of Sex who fears intimacy and has only had one serious relationship in his 800 years of life." Feng Xin should ask Pei Ming for help dealing with the horny prayers and Pei Ming should be delighted to share his knowledge with One Of The Guys and that should lead to the weirdest makeout session Feng Xin has ever had. It would be funny first but eventually they can have deeper conversations about what it means to be soldiers, their relationship with royalty/authority, love and loss and broken friendships...

And then my final thoughts are that I like any kind of dynamic that doesn't have Feng Xin as the sexy big-titted lampshade to Mu Qing's OOC crying traumatized little meow meow. Peixin has the potential to highlight some different sides of Feng Xin's character--it's simultaneously a friendship where he doesn't have ancient baggage to worry about so he can relax a little, but he also can't relax because being around Pei Ming is an inherently flustering experience and by the time Feng Xin realizes it he's probably in too deep (or maybe Pei Ming is in too deep ifkwim)

[mcytshipsandmore]

I think impulse and Joel should kiss. Or at the very elast that impulse has a crush on joel.

Ok so y? Y'know how they were like soulmates of toxic newly divorced ethubs? Well after double life the boat boys become a lot more closer than impdubs (in my HC) who still seem to have this tragic barrier between them.

The first time the obsession bit starts is when impulse notices this. He's just started a base with bdubs, the love of his life, and yr he can't seem to have a deeper conversation with him

And here etho and Joel were ,sure they both seemed a little crazy in how they showed their affection,but they were showing it nonetheless.

Joel came down most nights to the soup shop, when he's too tired to start dinner. He notices one day impulse seems more down than usual.

it goes something like this, like how Joel is always just a tsundere about everything and anything. And he tells impulse his moping is affecting the soup quality. Ofc impulse apologizes immediately altho he secretly thinks Joel really is a bit of an arse.

Then Joel prods him even more, trying all the whole to seem like he doesn't care. Impulse eventually realizes at the fifth comment and says something vague about bdubs.

Joel seems to understand almost immediately. And doesn't think impulse is being too needy or anything, something impulse hadd been worried about since etho didn't seem to be as clingy as him.

He tells impulse, in the same tone, that he should learn to value himself. And that he's a pretty great guy.

A sort of conradery is struck then, and the next time Joel comes down to the shol they talk properly. Eventually becoming proper friends. Joel stays longer to help clean up and impulseooks forward to it every day, keeping the store open late in case Joel decides to come and being disappointed if he doesn't

Somewhere along the way impulse realizes, amidst all this, that Joel isnt an asshole, sure, but more importantly that he's started sweating whenever Joel's around, and everyt joke he says is suddenly extremely funny.

And now he's guilty, because for one, he's spent all this time hopelessy in love with bdubs and the moment they actually get together he likes someone else what kinda person is he? He also knows he doesn't stand much of a chance what with etho now suddenly being all over Joel, and vice versa.

Still, he can't stop himself from asking, what if the universe messed up? What if it was meant to ethubs after all that were soulmates. And impulse and Joel were supposed to be soulmates too before all their red strings got messed up and tangled.

Sorry for the long walk they've just been spinning in me head.

The idea of their soul strings getting tangled is such an interesting concept to me.

As for the ship itself? Love it. 10/10. All it takes is toxic ethubs to bring it out -🍫

(This idiot forgot to use their emoji I had to add it for them -⭐️)

[cicicolorao]

Some quick ray headcanons framed around Laserhawk Rayman’s college years. Thanks to Stitch (@aiienloser) for helping me out with the specifics!

Click Read More to read a buncha them!

- Pescatarian, since a lot of the Glades is covered either by beaches or swamps (looking at you Rayman 2). Longer fangs keep those fishies from slipping away! However most of his diet consists of fruit! Need that glucose for energy.

- His tongue is reaaaaally long, and alongside his stretchier skin it lets him grimace to scare enemies away, or taunt them. However, it also allows him to get himself a nice nectar snack from flowers and pollen! A nice stroll around makes Ray a particularly big pollinator. :)))

- in general a lot of his body is very elastic, and his bones have a bit of give. It makes him real bouncy, and makes landing from big distances less shocking to his being.

- Speedy mother fucker. From running to climbing, Ray’s good at parkour and gymnastics, and uses that speed as an advantage, since he’s kind of a glass cannon.

- Doesn’t have a standard sleep cycle like most animals, however this is just a common trait of beings from the Glade of Dreams. He can stay awake for weeks, only to take a “nap” for days on end. If left undisturbed, he could even sleep for years, without eating. Just means that he’s lethargic when he wakes up.

- His body parts connect to each other with a sort of energy similar to magnetism, and with concentration that energy can “stiffen” up, creating the facsimile of arms and legs. His limbs can extend up to 5 feet away from his body, but with practice they can go further. If they do go further, the energy thins out.

- His hair doesn’t have a hairline, it extends down to his face to look like peach fuzz. The peach fuzz is also found across his body where you’d find body hair. The longer strands in his head can move similar to a tail, either consciously (like helicoptering to glide), or subconsciously (like when he emotes). It’ll move on its own even when it’s brushed back.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Call that a Cave Story.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[they-didnt-last]

anyone interested in talking about the iconic 2000's middle-grade-bordering-on-ya book series gallagher girls??

[elizakai]

i love the MTTRIO because they are all judgy hypocritical little shits living off of spite and appy juice

[peppermint-whiskers]

Wait I just realized something. Alice is part of the God Possessed Pentious AU. However, she’s also a part of your Zestious fic “A Hundred Years and Many More”. Does… does that imply that, at least in your fic, Zestial had a crush on Pentious. Then Pentious died and got possessed by God. If so, I cannot WAIT for that reaction!

“The guy I had a crush on is, not only alive, but is also GOD’S VESSEL!!????!!!” [insert Catholic Guilt here]

Hi, thanks for the ask! "A Hundred Years and Many More" was more of a test run for the backstory, and the backstory (with Alice's glorious presence uwu) is actually part of the au

BUT

I think it'd be hilarious if Zestial and Pentious had this lingering crush on each other the entire time XD Maybe Zestial's was born out of intrigue more than romance, but they both had CRUSHES

And now god's over here like "what's with you and crushing on people who could destroy you??? what the fuck, man???" because he knows. Pentious can't really hide his massive crushes because he can't hide shit XD

[beeduoo]

originnssssss who remembers origins i Loved origins

[lavenderjewels]

you fascinate me

[lala-blahblah]

I will never make this because it would be for an audience of one (me) but ever since reading "If we Were Villains" (story about serious drama kids in college who perform shakespeare and deal with a murder) I have been entertaining the thought of a crack fic crossover with High School Musical The Musical The Series where the staff decides they will no longer put on shakespeare after the tragic accident that happened at Thanksgiving, because Shakespeare plays would only increase the tension and drama. So they hire Ms. Jen who decides their spring play will actually be High School Musical (which exists in the 90s in this universe) and it ruins the vibe so much that everyone gives up on being dark and mysterious because they're universally pissed at Ms Jen for making them learn choreoraphed basketball dancing.

[bumblingbabooshka]

One of the best Voyager scenes to indicate Tuvok & Neelix's dynamic and how I think Tuvok is just as if not more 'annoying'(positive) than Neelix is when Neelix pours Tuvok a fresh squeezed glass of a fruit juice blend and Tuvok's like (paraphrased) "I don't want to drink this." and Neelix is like "Can you please try it?" and Tuvok's like "I don't want to, you're really bad at this sort of thing. It's going to taste bad." and Neelix says that Ensign XYZ said she LOVED it, she even had a second glass! And Tuvok says Ensign XYZ could drink poison without a second thought and Neelix is like "Tuvok could you please just TRY it? Just try a little SIP of it PLEASE??" and Tuvok sighs and rolls his eyes and sniffs it before taking a sip and it turns out he loves it. Turns out it tasted good actually. And then after all that Neelix tries to talk to him over eggs (which he's again cooking fresh for him) and Tuvok tells him he doesn't wanna hear "the life history of his breakfast." Absolutely insufferable this man I would have burned his eggs on PURPOSE!!!!

[ryssbelle]

My cousins made their own troll Ocs and I drew them in my style.

They were very excited about it

[volivolition]

suggestion do you have... any wants? like obviously you do but like? suggestion my guy my ourple boy. both the easiest and hardest to write. you need a skill to say something to move conversation along but it doesn't fit any skill in particular? about 80% of the time you can have suggestion say it and it will make sense. but like actually characterizing him... how do i define you dude... what makes your character tick... urgh. i dont get you yet. im trying to understand but you are difficult.