#i need to morn all that im slowly losing and can ignore any longer

[tonesplash]

its thanksgiving get nasty (18+)

pairing: edward cullen x reader

summary: you get bored at thanksgiving dinner. unfortunately for edward you wore sandals

warnings: smut,brief footjob, thanksgiving dinner, edward kind of chokes on corn, reader doesn’t like their family, mild injury, fingering, innappropriate use of vampire speed, technically exhibitionism and public sex?? bad dirty talk, and cousin-shaming, reader is afab and might be described as female im not sure

a/n: i wrote this in 24 hours so any sloppiness is not my fault

masterlist

(c/n)= cousins name

When you told him thanksgiving with your family would be boring, you’d meant it’d be for him, looking forward to his reaction to being on the receiving end of your bloodlines ridiculousness while you’d get dinner and a show. But, as it turns out, your family just so happens to get along with Edward much better than they do with you.

The seating situation is a little unconventional, since because your boyfriend-snatching cousin stole the open seat next to Edward before you even made it back from the bathroom, leaving your only viable option directly opposite of him. On the bright side, you had the option of kicking his leg when he’d said something to embarrass you.

 Bless his soul, he’d done his best to bring you into the conversation but apparently, anything you had to say about your relationship had been relayed verbatim to the family group chat you weren't even in by your mother. So, after the third time you’re talked over by the aforementioned horny cousin or some other nosy relative on you’re bored out of your mind.

Everyone had gotten over your piss poor table manners years ago, or were just completely ignoring you at this point because there were no protests when they’d brought the turkey out and you’d stayed slumped low in your seat like a child in church.

Twitter had stopped refreshing ten minutes ago, and when you finally resigned yourself to tuning back into the conversation, your mother was showing Edward your baby pictures again. Idly swinging one bare foot under the table, your bare toe grazes the drape of his dress slacks under the table when you get an idea.

 You’d lost a sandal earlier after Edward had pinned it under his shoe in a vain attempt to stop your pinching and dirtying of his slacks with your filthy soles. You scoot a little further forward in your seat to reach out and press your arch flat against his shin.

Edward doesn’t visibly react, just shifts his leg away, leaving yours to slip to the floor until you reach up again to plant your heel on the seat of the chair. The conversation lulls for a moment as everyone says grace, and he uses the opportunity to grab your ankle and send you a warning glare over the top of your phone.

You meet his gaze and boorishly eat a spoon of mashed potatoes, shrugging as if he couldn’t read in your mind exactly what you were about to do. 

Your cousin asks about his mom car again and when you roll your eyes Edward flicks the outside of your fibula, sure to bruise, and you crinkle your nose, pinching his marble thigh between your toes as best you can through the material.

“Well my father thought it was necessary for my siblings and I to-” 

While he talks, he's soothing the spot he flicked, playing in the stubble leftover from your shoddy shave job this morning, and the absent affection gives you the final motivation to further push your luck. You tease the seam of his left leg with the very tips of your toes, coaxing the unnatural heat of the venom to build in the crotch of his pants, the coolness of the rest of him making it seem even hotter in comparison.

He inhales on a forkful of corn, almost taking it down the wrong pipe, and you fight a smile around the bowl of the spoon as he flawlessly recovers and finishes the thought. You idly wonder if you could be that smooth someday. For now, you press further, pressing a toe against the seam over his cock, stroking up and down as slowly and consistently as you can while stretched under a table because who would’ve thought that footjobs are kind of an athletic feat. 

Edward taps insistently at your leg, harder than he normally would, and you have to hold back a laugh at the idea of him splitting the table because he can’t take a little footsie action. You press forward again, arch encompassing his hardness through the fabric, toes curling against his pubic bone when-

“Ho-oly shit!” Searing pain shoots up from your ankle, and you double over, using everything in you not to shout, Edwards dawning mortification going unnoticed as everyone at the table turns to you at your unexpected outburst.  

“(Y/n)?” Your mother doesn’t seem that happy to have dinner interrupted, and you clutch your stomach as a quick cover.

“Uh, my bad.” You snicker nervously at the sudden attention, bravado gone. Your face feels red-hot. “I actually need to use the bathroom, I think,” you lick your lips and slide out of your chair. “Lady problems.”

The table erupts in a cacophony of gags and groans as the notion of a menstrual cycle is brought up in casual conversation, and it gives you the perfect cover to retreat to the upstairs bathroom. It takes you a minute to make it up the stairs without causing a scene, and just as soon as you close and lock the door behind you and settle down to weep in peace, he’s there, jiggling the doorknob like it’s a drug bust.

“Let me in.”

You’re apparently taking too long because as soon as your injured foot touches the floor, he forces the lock and slips in, shutting the door a little too fast to pass as human. 

“Jesus! Edward, are you trying to lose our deposit?” You lean around him to check for a handprint but he doesn’t respond, wordlessly setting you up on the counter, kneeling to examine your injured ankle, cool fingers soothing to the sore skin. You sit in silence, idly swinging your other leg to distract yourself.

“How'd you make it out?” You can't imagine they’d let the guest of honor go so easily.

“You forgot your bag, I told them I’d just bringing it up to you.” He places your bag next to you as evidence. “Maybe you should start carrying menstrual products for when you actually need them.”

Of course, he breaks your foot and wants to lecture you on responsible uterus care. Edward sighs, taking your foot with the gentlest touch and whispering a kiss into the skin. “It’s only a sprain, but I’m still sorry.” 

“S’Okay.” Your face burns, not expecting his guilt. “Serves me right, huh?” You titter, poking his side with your uninjured foot. He swipes it up before you can start again, halfheartedly laughing with you. 

“Let me wrap it before you get any more ideas.” You hand him the compression wrap from the medicine cabinet, and he gets to work. The wince you give at the pressure is more reflex than anything, but the anxious expression on his face tells you he wasn't going to let this go easily. 

“Y’know…” You poke at him again. The playful contempt in his golden eyes gives you the go-ahead to make your case. “If you’re really feeling torn up about it, seeing you wow my family like that got me a little riled up.”

“Really.” Edward kisses the secured wrapping and releases you, standing to frame you against the counter.

“I’m serious, impressing them isn’t easy, (C/n) is probably shaving in the guest room to steal you from me right now, just thinking about it has got me a little hot under the collar.” You run your hands over his back and through his hair, nuzzling into the crook of his throat.

“You’re laying it on pretty thick, don’t you think?” His hands smooth over your exposed thighs sending a shiver up your spine. You think you've got him, but he's such a tease sometimes you can never really be sure.

“Depends. Is it working?” You still, bracing for some line about ‘responsibility’ and ‘your family waiting for you.’

But then his hands are under your skirt, hooking into the sides of your underwear and pulling them down your thighs, leaving them to free-fall to your feet. You clutch his auburn hair in your fingers at the shock of open-air against your cunt.

“Do you think I could let you go back to that table smelling like this?” His sweet breath washes against your ear as he huffs a soft laugh. “I’d rather not go downstairs and pretend to care about football when I know you’re here, hot and ready for me.”

You can’t resist him any longer, pulling him close and kissing him with the desperation of a woman who needs to be back downstairs before dessert. His thumb teases over your cunt at first, swirling over your swelling clit and teasing your hole before he finds a focus, using the thumb of his free hand to hold your hood back as his slicked fingers grind the bud into a frenzy while he sucks your tongue into his mouth.

It’s all you can do to hold your breath while he touches you, cool fingers building a knot in your belly, smooth and steady as they batter you up into a frenzy. He adjusts his hand, his ring finger pressing into you and bringing a low ache from rushed preparation, but you welcome it, thighs shaking with the effort to stay open for him as your mouth falls open in a shaky gasp. Edward breaks the kiss to let you breathe , seemingly unbothered until- 

“(C/n) is coming.” 

“Wha-” A particularly deep stroke has you biting your lip as you struggle to concentrate. “What the fuck does she want?”

“She’s going to ask you where I am.” His expression doesn’t match his words, still completely concentrated on ruining you despite the obvious issue.

“And what am I supposed to tell her?!” You hiss back right as she reaches the door. His mouth closes over your pulse point and you don't think you've clenched that hard before in your life.

“Hey (Y/n)? Have you seen Edward?” Her voice is enough of a mood killer that you have to shove your face into his throat to ground yourself in the moment. He adds a second finger, gaining speed, and you pray and hope to any god listening to this that she can't hear the squelches through the door.

“N-no.” You rack your mind for an excuse. His scent is making it harder to concentrate. “I think he went out for a smoke?” Nice one.

“Really? I didn't smell anything on him...” If all your blood flow hadn't been centralized below the waist at this point you'd’ve asked how the hell she knows what he smells like. He's fully abandoned your clit now, leaving it to pulse in the open air while three of his fingers push and pull at your pelvic floor.

“That's cause he unh-” You slap a hand over your mouth to stop the moan before it can be recognized for what it is.“-he vapes!” Edward pulls back from your throat to look at you incredulously, but it's a little hard to be ashamed when he's nearly wrist deep inside you.

“Oh… Well, let him know if you see him that they’re playing charades and I need a partner. You know how it is.”

You forget to reply, too enthralled watching him spit onto his unoccupied fingers and mash the coolness against your clit, causing you to nearly spasm off the counter, losing the sensation as he silently laughs at having to hold you steady. She seemed to have taken your silence as an admission, as you can hear the door at the stoop of the stairs swinging shut after her. Thank God.

“Rub your spot, Sweet, come on, we have to be quick.” He kisses your temple and laughs a bit maniacally at the little whimper that escapes when you bring a hand down to your clit. “Surprisingly, she’s having trouble picturing me in a vape shop.”

You whine around a bitten lip, too far gone to listen to his ribbing. You’re building up to overstimulation with the sloppy way you’re rubbing yourself, and he must feel it too, because in the next second, his fingers are vibrating.

“Come on, (Y/n), don't you want to finish up here and mop the floor with them?” You hadn’t even realized how hazy your vision had gotten until he grabs your chin and levels your lidded eyes with his and says your name again. You nod sluggishly for him, not hearing a word. He laughs again, smiles wide. His teeth are pretty. 

“If you cum right now;” The buzzing grows stronger, your free arm spasming under you as you support yourself. “I’ll rub you raw after on the ride home. You just need to come right now and win charades with me.” 

The buzzing inside grows too strong, and your vision goes white, pulsing in long pulls around his fingers as hot waves of sensation spread from your head to your toes.

Edward kisses you, soft and slow, swallowing any whimpers tempted to escape as you come down, abandoning the counter to clutch his sleeve as the twitching reduces to a tremor.

“Oh my god.“ You laugh, planting your face into his collar as you catch your breath. “I can't believe you used charades to make me come, I'm never gonna forgive you.” 

“I heard the top prize is a ten dollar gift card to…” He squints and checks again. “The Google Play Store.”

“Ew, what could you even do with tha-”

“(Y/N) come help with plates!” Your mother shouts up the stairwell, totally fucking up any release you just had.

“I guess I should run down to the corner store;” Edward smiles, helping you to stand on wobbly legs and smoothing your skirt down. “Don't want to blow your cover.” 

“(Y/N)! Plates!”

“Oh my god;” Your eyes may never return from the back of your skull. “Meet you downstairs?”

He kisses you sweetly one last time, pulling you close and wiping the sheen of sweat off of your face.

“Downstairs.”

With that, he heaves himself out of the narrow sill, and you busy yourself cleaning up as fast as you can.

You just catch him hopping off the roof, and coming around to the front yard. He'll hear you no matter the volume, but you still shout the warning;

“Stay away from my cousin!” 

[barzzal]

close to you

summary: there’s nothing more excruciating than to lose someone you’ve never imagined losing. but what happens when they’ve already left right before you can even acknowledge them leaving? mathew is yet to find out.

↳ pairing: mathew barzal x you

↳ warnings: falling out and break ups 

↳ genre: angst.

↳ length: imagine; 1.3k

↳ masterlist: the barn

↳ track: close to you by rihanna (listen to this it’s all that there is really)

note: unsolicited barzy angst fic because i was sad and listening to rihanna, (plus you guys know how much i love angst) this is totally unplanned and written in the past hour so im sorry if there’s sum typos bc i didn’t proofread this :<< hope u still like!! feedbacks are very much appreciated! <3

You were slipping away and he knew it. 

Mathew’s mind was running wild. His thoughts were coming in one after another and no matter how hard he tried to shut it out of his head — there it was again. 

The cyclical pattern of his seemingly endless misery. 

The thought of losing you. 

Days with you were spent either in total silence, eating lunch with the television on in the hopes of drowning out the numbing noise that was now in every corner of the home you have built with Mathew; or you know, the mandatory screaming match you indulge yourselves with even over the smallest of things.

Things only escalated the more you try to talk about it. Neither of you really knew how and when it started. And neither felt the need to say a word.

All that you and Mathew did was to watch your years crumble before your own eyes. Years that got shattered with each night spent in an ice cold bed, backs facing each other, not bothering to say a word.

“What happened to us?” his voice crisp and clear even when whispering.

You feel his gaze and you begin to resent yourself for staying up so late. You see him in the corner of your eye, patiently waiting — silently pleading that you’d look his way. 

You didn’t. 

Instead, you close the book you were reading and take your glasses off. You sigh just as you put it on the bedside table. Mat does nothing but watch you silently, all whilst ignoring his chest growing all the more heavy each time you push him away. 

You turn to him, still not meeting his eyes before you turn your night light off. You answer with a meek reply, “I’m tired, Mat.” 

“Y/N.” he calls you once but it seems like it’s been hundreds of times for him. He wanted nothing else but to reach out to you — to hold you. Maybe then he’d feel less insecure. Maybe then he’d feel less afraid of facing the fact that you’re slowly fading away farther off his reach. 

He knows you heard him but he doesn’t get a reply. And you know he’d be grateful to take on crumbs you’d be willing enough to spare. However, just like the other times he’s tried, your mind numbing quietude was all he had to hold onto. 

You try to drift away faster into sleep for you did not want to spend the night hearing him pick out on almost every meaningless thing you’ve done for the past couple of weeks. You were just tired. Insanely tired. And Mat had very little, perhaps almost nothing to do with it. You were lost.

“Do you still love me?” you hear a catch in his throat that instantly tugged strings in your chest. 

You fall silent, finding it hard to voice the words Mat had wanted to hear. 

Do you still love him?

You didn’t know. 

“Baby, please talk to me.” he pleads the longer he basks in your silence. Silence that Mat knew well enough to mean just one thing. 

“Please.”

Finally, as if it was the nearest he’s gotten to a win, he sees you shift, turning to face him. 

To say the least, you weren’t sure of how you feel towards Mathew. Being with him through all these years have been good, yes — but days weren’t always sunshine. It wasn’t always a calming afternoon walk holding each other’s hands, swaying it in the air, whilst you listen to birds chirping beautifully all year ‘round. Being with Mat came with its own sacrifices. Ones you cannot point out no matter how hard you tried and ones that just made him so hard to love. 

“I’m sorry.” you murmur. You avert his gaze, keeping your eyes low on the sheets you’ve once shared wrapped around your naked bodies in search of warmth in each other’s embrace. 

You never left Mat’s eyes because leaving you was the last thing he wanted to do. He hesitates to take a few strands that went astray to your face just so he could tuck it behind your ears like he always does. When you lean closer, nudging him to do just that, he feels a kindling fire in his chest. An all too familiar feeling he has deeply missed. 

His touch did not make you want to pull away nor did it burn you like it used to. A sad smile creeps up his lips once you finally take the leap and look in his eyes. 

“I know you are,” he says, clearing his throat. “And it’s okay. I understand.”

Mat wanted to. He truly does. He wanted to be selfish and just think about his own good. Letting you go wasn’t something he pictured doing because he knows that you know it has never crossed his mind. 

Mat wanted to do everything against what willed his heart. But he knew too that letting you keep him at bay just to spare his feelings would do more damage than it could fix and he just couldn’t afford having to lose you twice. He could barely walk through this conversation now. Therefore he’s certainly sure he wouldn’t be able to handle losing you more than once.

“I think I need to figure out some things on my own.” you tell him earnestly. A thing that you’ve wanted to let out ever since coming home to Mathew felt more work than it’s worth. 

“Are you gonna be gone for long?” he asks, voice thick and impending to break at any moment.

“I don’t know.” you answer with candor, an apologetic tone masking your words.

Nonetheless, no matter how much you did not want to spend the night breaking Mathew’s heart, he lets you rip one final bandage — exposing a long overdue wound that was without a doubt far from healing, “I won’t really know unless I try, right?”

“Okay.” he smiles, eyes softer than it ever was.

“I’ll be exactly where you left me.” 

The night grows deeper as the two of you sink in what seems to be the hardest falling-out you’ve yet to go through. A break up that would definitely stick around Mathew’s end for he has never loved someone as much as he loved you. Perhaps, even more to put himself in the most selfless position he would willingly let himself into. 

“What do we do now?” you ask, your voice low and on the brink of letting out a thick sob. 

Mat takes your hand and entwines it with his. He holds you tight. He lets his forehead rest on yours, breathing out the pain that’s successfully wrenched his heart in seconds. 

He pulls himself closer to you — pouring all he has left to give. Slowly, as he finally let himself pull away, he says, “We sleep.” 

No matter how much you wanted to say your piece, you just could not find the words that fit. And so, you do the sanest thing you could give him, leaning closer to every bit of his touch as if the clock had only started ticking. 

You see Mathew’s eyes glisten from the moonlight shining from across the room. If only you knew how bad you’re going to miss it. If only you’d appreciated it while you had the chance. If only you knew that the last thing Mat wanted was to see you right before he closed his eyes. 

“Good night, y/n.” he says, still holding your hand close to his chest.

God, if you had only known those eyes will be gone the moment you open yours, you would’ve held onto his hand a bit longer. Long enough before he emptied his closet the morning after. Long enough before he had the chance to wipe out every single trace he’s left your apartment. Perhaps even long enough for you to change your mind.

[watchmegetobsessed]

VALERIE - Part IV. (Harry Styles)

hello loves!! thank you so much for the feedbacks on the previous part, i love to see your thoughts at reactions so please keep them coming for the upcoming parts as well! i was informed that the posts weren’t showing up under the hashtags bc i had an extrernal link to the spotify playlist, so that won’t be available in the next parts, but you’ll always be able to find it in the masterpost if you’d like to give it a listen! those were the songs i listened to while writing the story! now, i dont want to keep you up any longer, here is part 4, one of my personal favs, and im excitedly waiting for your feedbacks on the post! have a wonderful reading!

word count: 4.5k

SERIES MASTERPOST

masterlist

Valerie is curiously watching her dad work on the portable bed they’ve brought over for the night, her little hands clutching onto Rosa’s shirt as she is telling you all about the list she has made for you. It’s not a long one, but you try to focus on every word she says, making sure you won’t mess anything up.

“I put an X behind the important ones,” she explains pointing at the paper and you nod, eyes roaming down on the few X’s on the list. “The other ones are just suggestions, things I thought you should know.

“Got it,” you nod again, biting into your bottom lip. Bath time, feeding, sleep time, everything is covered in the list and you’re happy she even mentioned the smallest details. Some things might be natural for her as she’s been doing it for months, but it’s your first time completely alone with a baby. You surely don’t want to mess this up, especially because you want her to trust you and let you look after Valerie more often. They deserve a break now and then.

Steven finishes the bed and backs out a few stuffed animals along with two blankets into it, making it look cozy and familiar for Val.

“But most importantly,” Rosa starts and you look her in the eyes. “Call us anytime if you need help or want us to take her home, and I mean it.”

“Not gonna happen,” you shake your head, earning a sigh from your sister.

“Y/N, I’m serious. We are thankful for the help, but it’s not your duty, alright? Just call us anytime, really.”

Nodding your head you flash a smile at her, knowing well nothing on Earth is gonna make you call them tonight. Okay, maybe there are some cases when you would call, but those are quite unlikely to happen.

She hands Valerie over who curiously eyes you before grabbing a handful of your shirt and making herself busy with the fabric.

“It’s gonna be fine. Have a great night, you deserve it,” you smile at them. Steven straightens up and curls an arm around Rosa’s waist as they watch Val in awe, clearly a little worried they are gonna spend an entire night without her, but you can tell they also can’t wait for some alone time.

“Alright, we should get going,” Rosa sighs and stepping closer she kisses Valerie’s head and then your cheek as well. “Have fun with your aunty! We’ll be back for you in the morning, Sweetie.”

She runs her hand over her little head and Valerie smiles at her happily, completely oblivious to what’s really happening. The joys of being just a baby!

Steven says goodbye to her as well and you all head to the door. 

“So, we’ll be here around eight, she is usually up by six. Do you want us to pick her up sooner?” Rosa asks standing at the front door.

“Sooner? I was about to tell you to sleep a little longer, you don’t have to come so early.”

“But we don’t want to take away your whole day, you need to rest too,” Steven explains, worry all over his face.

“Stop worrying about me, I’ll be fine. Just enjoy your night off! Come on, I’m throwing you guys out, time for the sleepover to start,” you tell them, shushing them out the door. 

It takes some time to finally get them to leave, but they eventually do. Then it’s just the two of you, alone for the first time.

“Ready for your first sleepover, Val?” you ask her, standing in the hallway of your apartment. She just stares back at you, saliva drooling from her mouth but even that looks cute on her. “Alright, let’s do this.”

You braced yourself for the worst. Thought about all the possibilities how the evening would go, but you hoped they wouldn't become reality. Unfortunately, baby Valerie had different plans for the two of you.

The first hour goes by fine. You feed her, have a little play time, reading her favorite book to her, but slowly, you notice her losing interest in anything and everything. Soon enough, you see her face distort into a grimace and a few moments later she starts crying and it’s straight downhill from there. 

Nothing can get her to stop. No food, no toy, absolutely nothing. You clown around, trying everything that pops into your mind that would calm her down, but it doesn’t seem like she is about to stop anytime soon. 

You start to panic. Rosa told you how fussy she is because of her teeth coming, but you didn’t think it would be this bad. When she’s been crying for an entire hour straight, for a split second, you think about calling Rosa. 

“No, not gonna do that,” you say, while Val is still screaming in your arms. “Valerie, what do you want? Tell me and I’ll give it to you, I promise! Just please stop crying!” you whine desperately, but, no surprise, no answer comes from the screaming babe in your arms, just more tears, puffy eyes and red cheeks from all the crying she’s been doing.

Trying to rock her into calmness you are moving around in the apartment when you hear your phone ringing. You instantly think it’s gonna be Rosa, wanting to check in on you, but how are you gonna answer the call when Valeries is screaming from the top of her lungs? She’ll come to pick her up straight away, no doubt about that.

Rushing into the kitchen you are relieved to see that it’s just Harry calling you.

“It’s not the best of times, Styles,” you sigh as you answer the call and put him on the speaker, leaving the phone on the countertop, so you have both your hands free for Valerie.

“Hey, I was just-- what the fuck is happening?” he asks hearing the deadly cries of Val through the line. “Is that Valerie?”

“It is! I’m looking after her so Rosa and Steven can celebrate their anniversary, but she just wouldn’t stop crying! I don’t know what to do!” 

You’re absolutely desperate. It’s so bad you can feel your throat closing up, nearing the edge of your patience, tears threatening to roll down your cheeks, but you tell yourself only one of you can cry at a time and Val has taken that spot quite some time ago, not even giving you a moment to let loose.

“Text me your address, I’m leaving now,” he orders and you snap your head towards the phone.

“What? No, Harry--”

“Just text me the damn address, Y/N!” he barks and the line cuts off right away. 

Your desperation pairs with shock now, not knowing what to think about this short, but quite eventful conversation you just had with him. It takes you a few moments to collect your thoughts, but you end up sending him your address. 

Nothing changes in the twenty minutes while you are waiting to hear anything from Harry following your text to him. Valerie keeps crying with three seconds of pauses when she takes a few deep breaths only to start screaming once again. Aside from the headache she is causing you, it’s becoming pretty impressive how long she’s been doing it. You probably would have fainted by now, but it seems like Valerie is running on an endless battery.

“You are really making it hard for me to be a cool aunt, Val,” you mumble, the baby still in your arms as the tears keep rolling down her face. Your light grey shirt is now soaking wet, both from her tears and your sweat from the anxiety she is giving you, mixed with some other things you choose to ignore where they came from.

The doorbell makes you jump, but Valerie doesn’t even bat an eye at the sound, she just keeps going.

“You need to teach me how to have this much energy,” you mumble under your breath as you walk over to the door. 

Opening it you find yourself staring up at Harry who is wearing a brown coat, dark jeans and a black hoodie. If you had to guess what he was doing on this weekend evening you would have said he was out with friends somewhere, picking up girls, but he surely doesn’t look like he was anywhere else than his home, the clothes are hanging messily on his frame, like he just threw them on in a rush.

His green eyes look straight at you at first before moving over to the crying child in your arms. You fully expect him to say something along the lines of “this is the kind of effect you have on others” comment, but it seems like he notices the fear and despair in your eyes and he keeps his mouth shut.

“I honestly have no idea what to do,” you choke out and the tears start flowing from your eyes as well, making Harry have to deal with now two crying human beings.

“Oh my, please don’t cry, I can’t take two crying women at once,” Harry begs as he steps inside and shuts the door behind him. Turning to face you he reaches for Valerie, you hand her over to him, hoping she would magically stop the crying, but she clearly couldn’t care less.

“Why, can you take one?” you ask with a bitter chuckle as you wipe your cheeks.

“Not really,” he admits, making you smile. “So what have you tried?” he asks as he starts swaying and rocking Valerie in hopes of getting her to stop, but not even Harry’s charm stands a chance with her right now. Deep down you’re happy you weren’t the reason she got so fussy and upset, would have been pretty awkward if she stopped the moment Harry took her into his arms. 

“Literally everything,” you huff, shoulders falling forward. “I went over the list Rosa gave me, tried everything, but she wouldn’t stop. She’s teething, but this is… It seems like there might be something else maybe?” you tell him worried that something serious might be behind her behavior. You really don’t want to call and bother Rosa, but you are nearing the point where you’ll give up and ask for help.

“Maybe she needs to be changed?” Harry suggests holding her up, giving her butt a sniff, but you roll your eyes at him.

“You don’t think that was one of the first things I did? She is as clean as she could be. Maybe I should just call Rosa,” you sigh in defeat reaching for your phone but Harry snaps at you.

“No! Don’t, we can figure this out. Steven has been so excited to have a night off, we can’t ruin this for them. Come on, we have to have the slightest parenting skills and solve this without them.”

Nodding you agree with him, but you’ve completely run out of ideas.

“So what do you suggest?”

You can see the gears turning in Harry’s head as he is trying to come up with a plan, but it’s not like either of you have any experience with babies. The idea of calling Rosa is starting to burn in the back of your head, fear of failing this challenge taking over your thoughts.

Then Harry looks at you with a look that screams that he has an idea. You’re just about to ask what came into his mind when all of a sudden he starts to sing.

“Well, sometimes I go out by myself and I look across the water, and I think of all the things what you’re doing and in my head I paint a picture…”

You instantly recognize Amy Whinehouse’s iconic song, the one that’s also behind Valerie’s name, you know that for sure. Rosa was obsessed with the song growing up, she would sing it on the way to school, in the shower or while making dinner. You weren’t surprised she chose this name for her first daughter.

What surprises you that Harry sings like a literal angel. He hits the notes perfectly, nailing the lines like not many can and you listen to him with parted lips, eyebrows raised. This was the last thing you expected from him, but then again, it’s not the first time Harry has surprised you through the years of knowing him.

Valerie stops for a moment, her hiccups shaking through her body as her tear-filled eyes look up to Harry, and you both think this is gonna be the moment when she finally calms down, but he doesn’t even reach the chorus before she starts crying again, a defeated sigh erupting from him.

“Maybe she wants it instrumental,” you suggest and Harry gives you one of those ‘are you fucking kidding me?’ looks as you leave to run down the hallway, right into your bedroom.

“How am I supposed to make it instru-- what the hell, Y/N?!” He gives you a weirded out look when you return with a guitar in your hands. “Since when do you play the guitar?” 

“Since like… eighth grade,” you tell him as you sit on the couch and holding the guitar on your lap you try to find the right accords. “I told you, you know nothing about me.”

Harry nods with a surprised but amazed look on his face as your fingers strum against the chords. It takes a few minutes but you figure it out and glancing up you give a questioning look to Harry.

“From the start?” you ask and he nods his head, continuously bouncing up and down to try to calm Val down.

You start playing the song and soon enough Harry joins you with the singing, the two of you perfectly nailing it even without any practice.

“Stop makin’ a fool out of me, why don’t you come on over, Valerie?”

Maybe it’s the guitar, maybe it’s the singing or maybe the fact that the song has her name in it, but by the time you reach the halfway point in the song Valerie’s crying slowly starts to fade. You instantly share a look with Harry, but don’t stop, fearing that she might start again if the music stops. 

Her tear soaked cheeks smooth out as she is not screaming anymore and you can actually see her irises finally, her long lashes are sticking together from the salty tears and you know it’s gonna take some time for her to regain her normal state, but at least the crying has stopped. 

“‘Cause since I’ve come on home, well, my body’s been a mess. And I’ve missed your ginger hair and the way you like to dress…”

You tear your eyes off Valerie for a second, letting yourself wander over Harry’s features as he sings. He slightly furrows his eyebrows focusing on the lines, so his forehead has a few creases on it. His lips form the words so clearly and elegantly, you wonder how often he sings. Is it something he only does when he is on his own or he likes to perform as well? 

The only time when you heard him sing was at the bar when the two of you slayed the karaoke machine with that Avril Lavigne song. You were smashed by then, you remember that he had a nice voice but it was the last thing you paid attention to. Besides, he was kind of equally drunk as you, it was all for just fun, but now is a completely different situation. 

It’s no surprise Valerie finds his voice soothing, you’d probably stop whatever you were doing if you heard him sing. There are people with a good voice and then there are the ones that not just have a good voice but also that small something, that extra magic in them that makes you melt as their voice caress your ears. Harry is definitely the second case, for a moment you forget where you are or why he is there singing. It’s just his voice and the gentle strumming of your fingers on the chords. 

At the end of the song he starts repeating Valerie as the song slowly fades into nothing and you both stare at the little girl in his arms, clearly afraid she might start crying again. Unfortunately, your reservations become valid when you see the corners of her mouth curls down and you and Harry share a shocked look immediately.

“What else can you play?” he urges as Val whimpers in his arms, letting you know she does not appreciate that the singing has stopped. 

“Shit, shit! Um, something from ABBA?” you propose and Harry nods quickly, not even asking which song you know, so you take it as a sign that he probably knows all of them.

The first song that comes to your mind is Andante, Andante and you don’t hesitate to start playing again, just in time. Valerie was just about to start crying again, but as soon as the melody hit her little ears she calmed down and listened to it with tired looking eyes.

“Take it easy with me, please. Touch me gently like a summer evening breeze…” Harry sings the words and you can’t hold a smile back as he, once again, hits the notes just perfectly without missing a beat.

You’re convinced there’s not one person on Earth who has never heard a single Abba song, most of the population knows them by heart, but somehow you couldn’t really imagine Harry to be a person who knows the lyrics to the songs as well. But he does and sings it without messing it up even just once. It’s hard to imagine a younger version of Harry singing ABBA songs when they come on the radio, but the more you think about it the more the picture paints itself in your mind.

Valerie lays her head to Harry’s chest, stuffing her thumb into her mouth as she listens to the performance. She is probably enjoying the vibrance of his voice shaking through his chest and maybe this is what brings her the peace she’s been looking for all this time. Your heart skips a beat at the sight of them.

Harry glances at you, eyes so soft you melt under his gaze. However nerve wrecking it was to have Valerie scream for hours, she is still the cutest little thing ever as she rests her head on his chest, her long blinks giving it away she has definitely lost most of her energy. 

You don’t dare to stop the singing and playing. When you near the end of a song you quickly think of something else and whisper it over to Harry, who then gives his feedback on it with either a nod or a shake of his head. Most of the time he knows the songs you suggest so the show continues without a stop. 

Half an hour passes by when you see her eyes slowly closing. You still don’t stop though, only when Harry tries to listen to her breathing and he realizes that it was completely slowed down. She is out.

“Holy shit,” you breathe out quietly, your fingers feeling numb from the playing. You haven’t had a guitar in your hands for this long in a while, probably for years. Harry shares your relief, his throat has completely dried out and he is happy to finally breathe evenly, not just sneak a few breaths in between lines. 

“And now what?” he mouths as he is still gently swaying around with the sleeping Valerie in his arms. You put the guitar aside and check if she is for real asleep. Her long lashes are spread out on her puffy cheeks, gently snoozing into Harry’s chest as if she weren’t screaming for dear life just an hour ago. 

“Let’s put her down,” you whisper and nod at him to follow you. 

Reaching your bedroom you only switch your bedside lamp on so the light doesn’t wake her up. Pushing the stuffed animals to the side you grab the blankets and let Harry do the critical job. Leaning down he oh so slowly starts to pull her away from his chest, careful not to move too suddenly, it all feels like in those action movies when they are trying to get through the lasers without triggering the alarm. One bad move and the screaming threatens to start again and that’s the last thing you want, after all you’ve done to calm her down. 

You don’t even realize it but as you watch her little head reach the mattress you hold your breath, almost wincing upon seeing Harry’s hands slide out from under her sleeping frame. As if you wait for something to go wrong, both of you freeze for a moment, expecting her to start moving around and wake up, but she stays still. 

Eyes snapping up to Harry, you exchange a look and then you both head to the door, careful not to make any noise that can possibly shake Valerie up from her dreams.

“This was more tiring than running a marathon,” he huffs, throwing himself to the couch and you do the same next to him. 

“Have you ever run a marathon?”

“No,” he confidently answers and you look over at him with a puzzled look. “But I can imagine how tiring it is.”

You let out a chuckle, letting your eyes close for just a little bit. You haven’t even had the chance to realize how much this whole struggle with Val sucked the energy out of you, but now that you’re half lying on the couch it hits you all at once.

“I should get going,” you hear Harry mumble, clearly just as tired as you are, but he doesn’t move. 

“Mhm,” you hum, feeling yourself drift to sleep.

Neither of you moves and it doesn’t take a whole five minutes for the both of you to completely doze off.

The next time you wake up you feel an arm curled around your waist and someone is definitely pressed up against you while your back is against the back of the couch. It takes you a couple of moments and some blinking to realize it’s Harry you are all snuggled up to and the reason why you woke up is because Valerie is crying again. 

“Shit,” you mumble to yourself, mind still groggy from the sleep as you push yourself up on the couch. Just moments later Harry’s eyes flush open and you’re not sure it’s because of the crying or because you moved next to him. His arm slides off you as he looks around a little confused about his surroundings.

You don’t have the chance to think about how the two of you ended up cuddling on the couch, though it lingers in the back of your mind. Basically crawling over Harry you rush into your bedroom where Valerie is lying in her bed crying. It’s a different kind of cry, not like the one you were stuck with for hours before and you know she must be hungry.

“Ah, come on, little girl. It’s alright,” you coo at her scooping her into your arms. She immediately cuddles to your chest hiccupping against it, her little hands fisting your shirt. You leave to go to the kitchen and feed her, but just as you’re about to step out of the room you bump into Harry.

You bounce back from his chest, but his hand immediately reaches for you and grabs your arm, holding you in case you might fall back.

“Sorry,” you breathe out, thoughts still foggy a little. “She’s… hungry,” you explain, but he is standing so close to you, you can feel his body’s warmth and it instantly ignites the memory of being pressed against his side on the couch just moments ago and you can’t stop yourself from inhaling a shaky breath. 

“Let me help,” he croaks out and the two of you walk into the kitchen. Putting on her bib you hand her over to Harry who sits with her on his lap on a stoop as you get the baby food, warm it a little before joining the two of them and you slowly start feeding her.

“What time is it?” you ask realizing you have no idea how long you two have been asleep on the couch.

“It’s three am,” Harry answers before smiling down at Val. “Good job, Val!” he hums watching her take the spoon into her mouth.

You finish up feeding her, then give a try at burping her even though Rosa said it’s not necessary anymore. She just hums to herself so you head back to the bedroom, her eyes already threatening to close. By the time you put her back to the bed she is out again, so no private show is needed this time.

Walking out of the room you see Harry putting on his shoes and coat. For a split second you feel disappointed that he is leaving, but then your rational side puts you to your place. Of course he is leaving! Val is fine now, there’s no other reason for him to stay, right?

“Harry,” you softly say and he looks at you. “Can you please not tell Rosa and Steven that I needed help with Val?” you quietly ask, though there’s no doubt your eyes are practically begging him.

“No way I’ll ever admit to Steven that I sang ABBA to his child, so don’t worry about it,” he chuckles making you smile as well. 

“Thank you. And for helping me as well. I was really close to giving it up,” you admit folding your arms on your chest as Harry stands at the front door, hand on the door knob as he is looking back at you.

“No problem. Now you owe me one,” he smirks and you can’t hold yourself back from rolling your eyes.

“Sure,” you say with an airy chuckle. “Good night, Harry.”

“Good night, Y/N,” he smiles at you sweetly before opening the door and walking out. 

You take his place at the door and watch him walk down the eerily quiet hallway. He turns back to you one last time waving in your way and you nod back smiling before he disappears around the corner.

Closing the door you lean your back against it, taking a deep breath. Your eyes wander over to the couch where you and Harry were sleeping not so long ago. The feeling of his arm around you is still burned into your mind and you breathe in shakily as a memory snaps into your head of the exact same thing, only years earlier.

You lied almost exactly like that in his hotel room that night. His strong arms wrapped around you as you had your head laid on his chest, listening to his heartbeat that was slightly faster than the normal. Though you were still quite drunk, this feeling imprinted into your memories, because you felt so safe with him. Like nothing could ever hurt you if he was there with you.

Unfortunately, that feeling faded into nothing when you woke up in the morning quite fast. But this time, instead of disappointment and disgust, the only thing you still feel is the emptiness at the lack of his touch. 

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[slytherinsnekxvii]

muggle snape au!

Eileen Prince is young when she runs away from home. The older she gets, the bleaker life seems, each year following the decades-old pattern of betrothals and politics and scandals and orders and tradition. It's tedious, and everyone knows it. No one speaks about it. She turns fourteen and then fifteen and then sixteen, and each time she sits for a new portrait, the effort it takes to maintain a smile grows greater and greater. By seventeen, she truly can't be bothered anymore.

She graduates that same year, her grades impeccable, and does... nothing. At home, there is no Gobstones team to captain, no reason to tend to the garden when there are elves about. She attends dinner parties and weddings and galas, straight-faced at her parents' side, waits for her parents to marry her off until she can endure it no longer. Six months after she turns seventeen, she attends Abraxas Malfoy's wedding, nods politely, makes small talk when she's spoken to and feels something shift at the back of her mind when she realises that this isn't what she wants. When they return home that night and everyone else has gone to bed, Eileen quietly packs her things and leaves.

She runs away without knowing where she's going or what she intends to do, but she does, and she loves. She loves the world; for years, she travels lightly and quickly so that she can see as much of it as she can, delighted in even the dusty, cracked streets of Cokesworth. She loves learning; she picks up languages and skills and all manner of things for the sheer joy of it. She loves a man; his name is Tobias and he calls her 'Leen and makes her blush and she loves until it makes her heart ache to think of him and her kisses are a prayer away from being worship.

Eileen's trouble—for everyone has their own sort—is that she loves. She loves Tobias and she learns that he is not a man who enjoys secrets, and even less a man who could bear having a witch for a wife. She loves the world and it betrays her. It shows her families, loyal and loving and cruel in the stinging way of wounded pride and the dull ache of regret, and she wants nothing more than to hate even the thought of such a thing. It shows her a happiness that she cannot have if her child is born the way that she was.

So, instead of hating the world and the hand it's dealt for her, Eileen, who doesn't love so much as she devotes herself utterly (to travelling, and to learning, and to one man), thinks of her child and promises, fierce and uncompromising, that she will love them too and she will do everything in her power to care for them.

Her son is born on January 9th, 1960, and she loves him. She loves him, and she loves her husband and she loves their family, so she holds her breath for the first three or four years of his life, waiting and waiting for any sign of accidental magic, anything at all that might prove his heritage to his father.

She gets her sign one day, when Tobias is at work and her books begin levitating without a single bit of effort from her. It's all she needs.

She loves them, so she tells herself that she is a witch and she is capable and Toby doesn't have to know. When her husband and son—her family—have gone to bed, she rifles through her old things, the few books and such that she'd taken with her when she fled from her parents' home until she finds what she's looking for.

She blows dust off the cover, opens the book and listens to the spine creaking and the rustle of paper as the book flips through its own pages. They stop, gently falling open at the potion she needs and she nods, once, determined. The ingredients are fickle things, but she'd been good at Herbology in school—perhaps even better than she was at Potions—and so, it's not much to take a very quick, very discreet trip into Diagon Alley to find the seedlings she needs and nurse them to maturity within days. The trip to the Apothecary is a little harder, but nobody's really paying attention to who comes and goes at this time of year, so she buys what she needs with what she has and she leaves.

It's an old, old potion, used for many different things, deceptively easy to brew. It was once circulated amongst the Azkaban wardens for use on particularly unruly prisoners, especially when it couldn't be justified to give them the Dementor's Kiss. The Ministry used to administer it to people like her, who ran away from their lives to make homes in the Muggle communities. People whose very existence was once a threat to the secrecy of the Wizarding World. She is about to use it on her son, to make sure that her husband never knows about magic, never has the chance to find an excuse to leave them, to hurt them, to stop loving them.

She relies on old skills, brews in the kitchen while Toby's away at the mill and Severus is at school. The day it's finished, Tobias sees it on the fire before she can hide it away and wrinkles his nose at it, asks what it is.  She grits her teeth and ignores the pounding of her heart in her chest as she tells him it's a failed attempt at a new recipe and tries to turn him back to the table. A muffled thunk catches her attention, so she looks over his shoulder, watches Severus' glass bounce—bounce—off the solid floor and quietly loses her mind.

"All right there, 'Leen?" Tobias rumbles at her, and she shakes her head and orders them both back to the table. She prepares three plates of food—recently, there's been enough to feed them all comfortably, what with Tobias dragging Severus out to the mill or the park, sometimes, rather than spending all his free time and money at the pub. Silently, she scrapes the potion into the smallest of the lot, mixes it in until it's unnoticeable except for, perhaps, the taste. She eats with her husband and her son, and while Severus does wrinkle his nose a bit, he doesn't say anything and finishes the meal.

He's sick for a week. Fever burns through his tiny body, wreaking havoc on an already poor immune system. She panics a little—it isn't supposed to last this long, why is it taking so long?—but, still, she sits at his bedside with water and cold compresses, until he breathes easy, and sleeps restfully. The fever breaks, and he goes back to school. She continues to watch him. Glasses shatter, toys do not levitate, windows remain shut and she finds herself smiling despite the guilt that bubbles under her skin, sometimes. She's just burnt out her son's magical core, after all. Used one of the Wizarding World's most ancient punishments and turned him into a Muggle.

The years pass by, slowly, and quietly, with no fanfare. Tobias takes care of his family. He calls his wife 'Leen, tells his coworkers about her, preens when Smith's wife compliments her garden. He brags about his son, real smart—he takes after his mum, then, eh, Toby?—and good enough with a ball—your lad's quick, I'll give 'im that, at least. Eileen's glad for it, because now, the twinge in her chest is all but unnoticeable.

Severus does take after her, she notices. Spends more time in his books than anywhere else, although it's never really a fight to get him running off to the park to get dragged into a game of footy. He's good with his hands, too. He helps her out in the garden, tends to the plants almost as well as she does, even if he isn't truly aware of what some of them are.

When he turns eleven, there is no letter. Instead, there is laughter when his father traipses back into the house, just in time for a late breakfast. "Your brat's nagging me again, 'Leen," Tobias teases.

"Mine, Toby?" she chuckles at him. "I'm not the one who has him after me like a duckling."

"I wouldn't have to if you'd get him out of his books an' that garden of yours."

She hums, noncommittal. "Hm, well. And where, exactly, is this brat of ours?"

"I didn't tell you? He made a friend. They'll be 'round soon enough."

"Oh?"

"There's hope for him yet."

"Does this friend have a name?"

"Something... flowery? Her and the sister. Rosie, Daisy..." Tobias trails off, his thinking interrupted by the sound of the door slamming, followed by lively chatter.

"Good morning to you, too," Eileen greets, as the pair of muddied children walk into the kitchen. "Who's this?"

"Oh—" Severus starts.

"Hi!" The girl smiles, and Eileen takes a minute to look at her, all bright green eyes and leaves in her hair. "I'm Lily."

[thewalkingdead-fan101]

In this hell Daryl Dixon X Reader Part 14/??

Hey everyone! Part 14 is now here, it’s taken a little longer than anticipated but I am happy to post it now! As usual I hope you all like it and I hope that you're all having an amazing day/night wherever you are! :)

Warnings- SMUT 18+, Blood, Gore, General walking dead depictions, slow burn, swearing.

Day five

I jolted out of my sleep, gasping for air.

My hand found its way to my heaving chest.

The bed beside me lightly creaked as Daryl moved quickly, his knife held tightly in his hand as he searched the tent for any imminent danger.

I look down and check my chest for the gaping bullet whole that had awoken me, to find the skin still intact.

“What?” Daryl asked, his eyes finally settling onto my terrified form.

I swallowed thickly, softly shaking my head.

“Nothing. I’m fine.” I whispered. “Go back to sleep.” I sighed, rubbing my eyes.

I felt the bed move as Daryl sat down, returning the knife to its resting place. I could still feel his eyes burning into my skin.

“Im okay.” I softly smiled, turning to look into his worried eyes.

He shook his head as he laid back, his arms wrapping around my middle, pulling me into him.

His breath lightly fanned across my neck, causing my body to shiver beneath the breeze.

“Nightmare.” He spoke, as he nuzzled into my shoulder. I nodded as his body heat comfortably swallowed me. “It’s nothing.” I I closed my eyes and sighed. “It ain’t nothing.” He shook his head.

My hand reached down and lightly grabbed his, intertwining our fingers. “I’m okay, I’m here.” I lightly squeezed his hand.

His free hand gently squeezed my hip in response. “Let’s not talk about it.” 

“Nah-“ “Daryl.” I paused, sighing. “Please, I don’t want to think about it right now.” I finished.

I could feel the soft nod on my shoulder. I felt him move his free hand down to my stomach as he began to softly caress my abdomen, a usual occurrence since we have been at the farm. I smiled softly and closed my eyes, leaning further into his touch.

We laid together in silence for a few minutes, opening my eyes I turn my head, to see his head resting contently on my shoulder.

“Daryl?” I whispered softly. He grunted softly in response, clearly trying to sleep. “Babe?” I softly nudged him. “What?” He asked with an annoyed huff.

“We need to talk about baby names.” I whispered. Daryl scoffed behind me.

“Not now we don’t.” “But we do!” i whined softly. “I don’t care about what we name it.” “Babe.”

“No.” He shook his head, his stubbled cheek rubbing against my shoulder. “Yes.” I argued back, a knowing smile on my face.

“What about a namesake?” I asked, hearing a groan from behind me. “If it’s a girl, we could name her after your mother or my mother.” “No.” He shook his head. “If it’s a boy, we could name him after my father or-“ “Not a chance in hell you are finishing that sentence.” He growled. “Okay, well we don’t have sisters, so I guess we have to think of a girls name.” I spoke as I played with his finger that were intertwined with my own. “We ain’t naming our kid Shane.” He grunted behind me.

“No way.” I chuckled. “Well, do you have any ideas?” I asked turning my head slightly. “It ain’t my job to name ‘em.”

I rolled my eyes at his response.

“Okay, we will get back to the names.” I smiled. “Baby.” He groaned, burying his face into my shoulder.

“Just listen, you fell asleep last night.” I chuckled, rubbing his arm. “I’m 10 weeks in, 10 weeks and five days, meaning in two days I’ll be on 11 weeks.” He nodded against my shoulder.

“Bean is size of a prune, about 4cm long.” “Wish I could see them again.” I smiled softly, thinking about being at the cdc and seeing bean. “He or she is growing their bones, and their facial features are formed.” I smile, thinking about what the baby would look like.

Wether or not they take after Daryl, or myself.

“I hope that they have your eyes.” I smile softly. “Babe?“ “I don’t care about this shit.” He snapped, voice filled with annoyance.

“Oh you don’t care?” I asked pulling away from him, turning to look at him.

Daryls arms tried to keep mE within his hold, sighing as I sat up and crossed my arms, trying to be intimidating. “What are ya’ doing?” He asked, voice monotone. I ignored his questions, moving to climb over him, knees on each side of his hips. Daryl moved his hands to my hips and raised a brow as he watched me.

“I guess, if you don’t care about this ‘shit’.” I raised my fingers in quotation, before leaning down to whisper in his ear. “Then you won’t care about my increased sex drive.” I took his ear gently in my teeth.

Daryl growled and tightened his grip on my hips.

He sent a soft glare my way as I pulled away, a smirk on my lips as I teasingly grinded against him.

-18+ Below-

I could feel Daryl harden beneath me. I looked down between us, glancing at the growing tent in his pants. He sits up, his hands making quick work of slipping his hands under the fabric of my shirt. My hands reached his shirt, lifting it over his head, and dropping it to the floor.

Daryl moved his hands to my breasts, thumbs softly moving over my nipples. I gasped at the light touch and my head lightly rolled back at the sensation. I felt Daryl’s lips sloppily meet my collarbone, kissing along my neck as my fingers curled into his hair.

I gently tugged his head back. He looked into my eyes and let out a low growl as I pressed a quick kiss to his mouth. My palm flattened against his chest, slowly pushing him to lay down. He looked up with questioning eyes when he tried to push himself up, for my hand to gently push him back down. “Stay put.” I whispered, kissing his chest lightly, peppering kisses down his chest and stomach.

My hands lightly pulled his waistband down, Daryl lifting his hips in assistance, kicking his pants to the end of the bed.

I propped myself up onto my elbow, gently grabbing his cock, carefully spitting onto his tip. I spread the mixture of saliva and precum down his shaft with my palm, slowly working my hand up and down his shaft. Daryl shuddered lightly at the feeling, his chest rising heavily with each pump.

My mouth watered at the sight of his glistening cock as it throbbed in my hand. I looked up at him through my lashes, seeing him watching me intently as I lowered my head. I kissed his swollen head, bringing my tongue out to lick it. I brung the tip into my mouth, tongue swirling around the head as he grunted lowly. I looked up through my lashes, to see his head back against the pillow, mouth parted, eyes closed. HIs hands make their way to my hair, pushing my head further down his length. “That’s it baby.” He moaned, as I gag and slobber onto his shaft, as his hips begin to jerk up, into my face. I moan at the feeling of his hands pulling against my hair, causing him to hiss. Glancing up, I meet Daryls eyes as he watches intently. Keeping eye contact I take him as far as I can down my throat, my hand pumping the rest of the shaft.

I began to pick up a rhythm, lifting my head up, almost completely off him and I suck vigorously on the tip. Grunts and moans left his lips at the action, hollowing my cheeks, his hands tightening around my hair. “Feel so good.” He moaned, his head leaning back into the pillow. My free hand reached down to cup his balls, softly massaging them as he tensed under me, hands holding my head down further, bringing tears to my eyes as he chases his release. His hips began to lose their rhythm as he came, hot ropes of cum spurting from his cock hitting the back of my throat as I greedily swallowed. I pulled back, his cock slipping from my lips, his hands dropped from my hair, his left hand caressing my cheek softly. Looking up I see Daryl with his head buried into the pillow, trying to catch his breath. I slowly crawl up next to him, my hand resting on his chest. Leaning over I press a soft kiss to his cheek, only to have him pull me into a kiss. -End of 18+- Daryl pulled away from the kiss, lazily laying his head down. Pulling me closer to his side as he laid there in a post orgasmic bliss, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat under my palm. It didn’t take long for Daryl to fall asleep. As always, he has no issues falling asleep, the green eyed monster surfacing within me each time he effortlessly falls asleep.

As I tried to force myself to sleep, it seemed that everything was against it.

I groaned as I tried to shift, uncomfortable from the pressure against my bladder. The arm draped over my abdomen became much heavier with each passing breath. I moved my hand to Daryls arm, lightly pushing it back, attempting to move it from around me, failing. I tried pushing his arm again, Daryl huffing and rolling over, a grumble leaving his lips as I gently climb over him. I pulled on one of the thin sweaters that sat in the corner of the tent, hugging it tighter to my body. I pushed aside the door, exiting into the slightly chilled breeze. Looking around I notice how clear the sky is, the stars brightly shining through the midnight sky. The breeze slightly picked up, the trees in the distance swaying, leaves rustling. I quickly did my business, cleaning up and running to the tent, pulling the sweater over my head, discarding it into the corner I got it from. I gently climbed over Daryl, making my way to my side of the bed.

Before making it to my side of the bed, I felt Daryl’s hands wrap around my waist, pulling me down on top of his chest. I looked up to Daryl looking down at me, one eye lazily opened. He closed his eyes, grunting softly as he shuffled around in protest as I tried to move off of him. I chuckled softly, ceasing my movements as Daryl gently squeezed our bodies together. Daryl began to softly snore again and I smile at the man beneath me.

The morning was long, Daryl had woken up first, leaving me to wake up alone. Doing the morning routine, taking off my bandage, checking my leg out, the blisters have shrunk slightly, the redness now a more pale pink instead of the harsh red. We really need to have a conversation about that soon, I thought to myself as I walked toward the campsite.

“That leg is looking good!” Dale called as I took a seat next to Carol.

“Yeah, she’s healing up nicely.” I smiled, turning back to slightly look at the older man. T-dog had decided that he was cooking breakfast today, the rest of us knowing that we’d be waiting a little bit longer than usual. Carl was hanging around Lori, she was making sure to keep him closer than usual with Randall around. I looked over and gave Glenn a soft smile, he looked away and left, entering the RV. Dale and I shared a look as he nodded and followed Glenn. Andrea had crawled out of Shanes tent, not expecting to be seen. She smiled at me awkwardly, rushing to her own tent. Carol shook her head next to me.

Rick had made his way back to the group from the house and met Lori with a kiss as she met him halfway. The married couple stood there for a couple of minutes, talking and looking around discreetly. Rick’s eyes landed on me, Lori’s eyes finding me soon after. Lori nodded towards her husband and rushed off to their shared tent as her husband walked towards me.

T-dog swore as he dropped the pan, quickly looking around and apologising when he saw Carl with a small smirk on his face. “(Y/n)?” Rick’s voice cut the silence. “Rick.” I nodded, looking up. He nodded his head behind him, signalling that he needed to speak privately. I nodded, standing to follow him. “I’m just checking in, seeing how you’re doing.” “Im fine.” I nodded, crossing my arms over my chest. “After the other day-“ “I understand why you did it.” I cut him off pausing. “No hard feelings.” I lightly tapped his shoulder.  Rick chuckled softly as he shook his head.

“Lori was talking to me before, about how instead of Dale watching you, maybe you’d like to watch Beth while Maggie gets some work done around the property?” He paused. “If it’s something that you’d want to do of course.” He nodded. “Yeah, if that’s how I can help around here, im happy to do it.” I smiled. “Ive already spoken to Hershel, he thinks it’s a good idea. He said that he wants to give you a look over, make sure that you’re okay.” “Ill head up now.” I smiled softly. “No, please, wait and have breakfast with everyone.” “I don’t mind-“ “Please, Carl said he was worried about you not being at breakfast.”

I smiled softly and nodded. “Breakfast it is then, let’s just hope that T is finished cooking whatever it is he is wanting to cook.” 

Rick let out a laugh, as he looked toward the group. I followed his gaze to see Carol chasing T away from the fire, taking over breakfast. “We’ve been saved.” Rick chuckled nodding as we began to walk back. “Just don’t let him hear you say that.” I muttered as T-dog sat next to Carl, watching Carol continue breakfast.

Hershel had checked my leg out upon my arrival to the house, Patricia telling me to let her know if I needed anything.

I sat on the chair next to the bed as Beth looked up at the ceiling. The colour now completely back, her eyes now holding a shine, instead of the dullness they previously held.

Beth moved her head, her eyes meeting mine. I smiled softly at her as she watched me, her eyes looking down to my leg. Beth’s eyes lingered for a moment before meeting my eyes once more. “A ceiling caved in.” I paused. “Someone started a fire, and the ceiling caved in when we were on a run.” I continued. “Your dad fixed me up.” I smiled. She kept quiet, eyes travelling back to my leg.

Beth slightly opened her mouth and quickly closed it again. “Hey.” I spoke softly, getting her attention. I reached out and moved the hair away from her face. “You don’t have to speak right now, but I’m here for you.” “If you want to speak, im here to listen.” I finished. Beth’s eyes watered as she nodded softly, turning her head back to the ceiling. “Thank you.” She whispered softly.

I smiled at the small response from the girl. “I was speaking to your dad earlier.” I shifted on the seat, bringing my leg up to rest over the other.

“He said that your recovery is good, and that if you are up for eating normal food again, that he will be able to take out the tubes tomorrow.”

Beth’s eyes lit up, watering slightly as she nodded softly. “Really?” She whispered, looking at me. I smiled widely at her, nodding. “Yeah. As long as you’re still good by tomorrow.” I grinned.

Beth slowly moved herself trying to sit up.

I got up, quickly helping Beth until she sat comfortably.

I fluffed a pillow and propped it behind her.

“This thing is so uncomfortable.” She sighed pointing to the tubing.

“Won’t be long, two more days tops.” I smiled. She nodded her head.

“I can go get Maggie if you’d like.” “No.” She shook her head. “I’m sure she would be happy to see you.” “I know, but she has things to do.” “Well, What about your dad? Or Jimmy?”

She shook her head.

“Patricia?” “Not yet.” “Talk to me.” I sat on the edge of the bed, next to her.

She looked up and shook her head.

“I’m not ready.” She paused.

“I’m not ready to be yelled at.” “I don’t think that they’d yell at you.” I paused. “But I understand.” I nodded.

“You aren’t ready, no one can force you to be ready.” “You tell me when you want me to roundup the gang, and I’ll do it. But I’ll only do it when you ask me to.” 

Beth smiled softly and nodded her head.

“Can you help me back down?” She asked softly. “Of course.” I nodded.

Once Beth had laid back down, the floor board outside of the door creaked.

I looked over to the door, spotting Lori standing awkwardly by the frame. 

“Shane is looking for you.”  “I’m busy Lori.”  “I’m only here to tell you that he is looking for you.” She shrugged. “I have to stay with Beth.” I shook my head smiling softly towards the young girl.

“I’ll take over. You go to him.”  I looked back to Lori who stood with a bored expression.

“Any idea what he wants?” I asked softly. “Nope. You’d best be getting to him though.” “Where is he?” “By the barn.” She rolled her eyes as she stepped into the room. 

I stood and looked down at Beth.

“I’ll be back soon.” I smiled at the girl who only slightly nodded. “Did she just-“ “Yes. She is responsive. Hershel is aware.” I nodded walking past Lori.

The walk to the barn wasn’t all that long, the sun glaring down harshly. The closer to the barn I got, the worse the feeling in my stomach grew. 

I paused, looking around the exterior, Shane no where in sight.  I rounded the corner of the barn, still no Shane in sight. 

“Shane!” I called out, no response.

I continued to search for my brother, only to be met by no one.

“Shane! Stop messing around.” “Shane.” I called out again.

I heard a rustle inside of the barn. 

I shook my head and walked to the door. 

“Shane. I swear to god I will kill you if you keep wasting my time.” I chuckled softly as I stepped closer to the door.

I placed my hand against the door, pushing it open. I was met with dark eyes.

Randall was sat on the floor, hands tied behind his back. Hair messy and framing his face.

“Hey!” He whisper shouted. “Close the door. Before he comes back.” He nodded to the door.

Against my instincts I closed the door, leaving it open two inches. 

I stayed near the door, alert to the stranger.

“You have to help me. Please.” He pleaded.

I watched as he attempted to move closer.

“Stop.” 

Randall stopped moving, looking up at me.

“You’re really pretty.” He breathed. “Dont. Flattery won’t get you anywhere.” “No, please. I’m not being funny or smart.” He paused. “Please. Please help me. They’re gonna kill me.” He whisper shouted as tears welled in his eyes. “He is crazy. The bald guy.” 

I stifled my laughter at his description of Shane.

“He wants to kill me. I’m innocent. I swear. My group, we’re good people.” He tried to plead. “Good people?” I asked, a glare in my eye. “Yeah, we keep to ourselves. We don’t engage in fighting. Your people attacked us.”

I shook my head.

“You’re wrong.” I shook my head. “I swear! You have my word.” “Your word doesn’t mean shit to me.” I scoffed. “Please. You don’t know us.” “I know enough.” “It’s all lies! Whatever they have told you!”  “They didn’t tell me anything.” 

He looked at me, a confused expression on his face.

“My friend and I, the Asian guy.” I began. “We went on a run. Your buddies set a building on fire with us in it. My friend overheard them talking about what they were going to do to me.”

Randall’s eyes widened as I spoke. 

“I don’t have to tell you though do I? I’m sure you already know what it would’ve been. Considering you’re one of them.”  “I swear! I’ve never done anything like that! I’m only with them for survival.” He cried. “Please unite me. Let me go. I’ll disappear.”

I opened my mouth to respond.

The door burst open, light illuminating the barn, Shane’s silhouette blocking some of the light.

“You. Outside. NOW.” Shane glared at me.

I nodded, quickly slipping past Shane.

“Wait for me.” He turned his head slightly. 

I watched as Shane walked in, slamming the door closed. I jumped as the hinges creaked and the wood slammed against the frame.

“No, no, no please.” I could hear the muffled voice of Randall plead.

I heard the grunt coming from my brother, the Yelp from Randall and the contact of Shane’s fist to Randall’s stomach.

I could hear the repeated contact of fist to skin, the cries coming from Randall and the grunts coming from Shane with each hit.

I waited for ten minutes until the door opened.

Peering into the barn I could see a slumped Randall on the ground.

Shane strode out of the Barn, closing the door behind him, shaking his hand and cracking his knuckles. 

He was mad, which seemed to be an understatement.

“What the hell were you thinking?!” He sneered as he walked towards me. “I’m sorry.” I shook my head.

Shane shook his head and scoffed.

“Are you an idiot? You must be. Going in there with that guy.” “Shane I didn’t know that that’s where he was being kept.” “What did he say to you?”  “Nothing.” “Don’t lie to me.” He grabbed my shoulder hard, nodding his head down and looking at me through his lashes. 

“He asked me to let him go.” “And you were going to do it?” He scoffed moving back. “What?! No! I wasn’t going to! I’m not stupid!”I shook my head watching as Shane paced.

“He tried to tell me his group was harmless.” “No one is harmless.” He looked down and inspected his knuckles. “I know that.” “What the hell were you doing in there?” “I was looking for you. Heard a noise and thought you were in there.” “Looking for me?” He asked. “Yeah, Lori told me you were looking for me.”   “I didn’t think you’d come.” He scoffed. “Then why’d you send for me?”

“We needed to talk.”

“Then lets talk.”

Shane nodded, moving away from the barn and leaning against a tree. I followed had and stood back slightly. “I’ve been thinking that it’s time for us to move on.” “What?” “We should leave.” “Leaving would be idiotic.” I paused, looking at the dirt. “It’s safe here, for all of us, for the group, for Carl.” “When I say we should leave, I mean us. Not the group.” I looked up, making eye contact with my brother as she crossed his arms.

“Excuse me?” “Come on. Just you and me, The Walsh duo again.” “Shane-“ “Hear me out.” He paused, raising a palm. “You pack a bag, I pack a bag, we take a car and just go. We’ll head to Fort Benning.”

“We don’t need these guys. They’re going to get us killed.” “Shane, we aren’t leaving.” I shook my head. “It’s safe here. We’re a family here.” “You and I, we’re family.” He corrected. “I’m your brother. I’ll protect you.” “I don’t doubt that Shane but I am not leaving.” “Cause of Daryl?” He scoffed. “Yeah. Actually. Because of him.” I returned the scoff. “This is the stupidest idea you’ve ever had Shane.”

I began to pace as Shane began to argue his point.

“He doesn’t care about you, the only thing that you’re good for is being on your back for him, it’d be safer for you to come with me.” “I don’t care what you say Shane, im not leaving.” “I can’t believe you’d do this.” He shook his head. “Do what?” I asked incredulously.

“Abandon your brother.” “I didn’t abandon you Shane.”  “You don’t get to guilt me into leaving with you by saying that.” I spoke through gritted teeth, taking a step forward and standing firm. “Because you were the one that abandoned me a long time ago.” I poked his shoulder, turning to leave. Shane’s hand wrapped around my wrist, pulling me back. “Thats not fair.”

I could hear the clanking in the trash bin as the glass bottles hit the sides, finally landing on the bottom of the bin. I held the blanket tighter to my chest, trying to prepare myself for what is yet to come.

The next sound I heard was the creak of the hinges and the sound of the screen door slamming against the chipped wooden frame. Heavy boots thudded against the hardwood floors, the sound of glass shattering from pictured being knocked from the wall. I shivered against the blanket, bringing it up to my face, trying to level my breathing out.

Light hit the wall above me as the door opened, the scent of cigarette smoke wafting into the room.

I tightly closed my eyes, trying my best to make sure my breathing was even. “You should be asleep you little shit!” A deep voice bellowed. I felt the tug of the blanket being ripped from me. My body began to tremble more as the bitter air stung my skin.

My right eye slightly opens to see the goosebumps raising on my arms.

The familiar feeling of his hands gripping my hair made me let out a whimper. My body hit the ground with a harsh thud as I yelped. Davids hands held my head against the ground as he unclipped his belt, listening as he pulled it from his pants. I heard the belt fly through the air, hitting my back repeatedly. I screamed with each lashing I got. The leather sharply hit my spine, my mouth hanging open, as the screams died down. My throat hoarse and stinging from the screams. “You worthless little shit!” He spat into my ear harshly as he threw his belt to the side standing up. “She’d still be here if it weren’t for you!” He screamed, kicking me in the ribs. I did my best to curl into a ball, to block the oncoming hits, failing as it only encouraged him to kick harder.

I had been living with David for seven months now.

CPS had decided to leave me in the care of David, which seemed like the best choice at the time. Living with David and his girlfriend Chelsea was great, until it wasn’t. Chelsea had broken up with David, ultimately breaking his heart. I’d overheard their conversation, it was the eve of my fifteenth birthday. “I’m sorry David, But I can’t stay.” She sighed. “No Chels, Please. You can’t leave!” He pleaded. “Davie, I’m not her mother. I’m not ready to be a mother.” “You don’t have to be a mother!”

“David, im only 23. I have a life ahead of me, and you’re holding me back. She’s holding me back.” Chelsea spoke, picking up her things and walking out of the door for the last time. I laid on the floor, pain shooting through my body as I sobbed, tucked into a ball. The only audible sounds being that of my heartbeat and his boots echoing down the hall.

“No, You left me with David.” I paused, grasping his wrist with my free hand and throwing it away from me. “That wasn’t fair Shane.” I watched Shanes face contort in confusion.

Dinner was awkward. Andrea had been shamelessly throwing herself on Shane, who was just watching Lori. Lori sat with her husband and son, throwing daggers at Andrea and Shane with her eyes. Glenn sat with Dale and Carol, often speaking words with them before longingly staring at the house. Daryl had decided that it was his night to watch Randall, not before Shane took him aside to speak. Since their conversation, Daryl had barely looked at me, making me wonder what was said between both men. Daryl was quick with eating his dinner, leaving to take over for T-dog. I began to eat my dinner, and watched as Carl sat with his plate, pushing around the beans with his fork, a disgusted expression plastered on his face. I smiled at the boy, standing and walking over to him. I held my plate over his, pushing the chicken from my plate onto his, smiling at him as he looked up. “You need this more than I do.” I smiled, quickly ruffling his hair. Lori glared in my direction, obviously not all that happy with my close proximity to her son. I nodded my head towards her and made my way back to my seat. Shane shook his head as he looked down at his own plate, looking back up, his eyes made contact with my own.

He opened his mouth to speak, quickly closing it again. I ate the rest of the food on my plate, heading off to my tent. I laid down on the bed, almost instantly falling asleep.

Day Six

The tent fabric was ripped open, jolting me out of the light sleep I had been in. Sitting up, I hold out Daryl’s knife that he kept by the bed, ‘by the bed’ meaning under his pillow. I slowly lower the knife. Looking around who stood in the doorway, I peered outside, the sky still midnight blue. “What the hell was that for?” I dead-panned. “Ya’ were alone with Randall.” Daryl looked down. “Did he touch ya?” “No, he didn’t.” “Did he try to?” “No. He asked me to let him go.” I scoffed, pausing. “As if I’d do that.” I shook my head.

Daryl nodded his head, slowly kicking his shoes off, stripping down moving towards the bed. “Are you okay?” “I’m fine.” He mumbled, stepping closer to the bed. He sat on the edge of the bed and sighed, placing his head in his hands. His scars on his back bare for me to see. My hands gently reached for his back, softly caressing his back, my fingers ghosting over his scars. His back tensed briefly, before relaxing under my touch. “Babe, talk to me.” I whispered, climbing behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist, softly kissing the scar along his shoulder. “I don’t like knowing he laid eyes on ya.” “Hey.” I spoke softly, moving to the side of him.

My hands softly grabbing his face, turning his head to look at me. “I’m okay, I’m here.” I paused.” “Daryl, I’m yours.” I smiled softly, kissing his forehead. I watched as Daryl turned himself around on the bed, reaching around and hugging me. We laid down, Daryl reaching over and turning off the dull lantern. “What time is it?” I asked as I looked up to Daryls face in the now mostly dark tent. “Two.” He mumbled as he shuffled closer, arms slightly tightening as we both began to fall into a deep sleep. 

The bed moved from beneath me as Daryl shot up and out of the bed. I jumped as he rushed and pulled his jeans on. I looked at him, rubbing my eyes and propping myself up on my elbow as I watched. “Hey, what-“ “I got shit I need to do.” “Did you need to spring up like that? Almost gave me a heart attack.” I sighed. “I’m late.” he nodded as he picked up his crossbow, quickly leaning down and kissing the top of my head. Daryl turned and practically ran from the tent. I sat up on the bed trying to piece together the last five minutes. I got up, quickly pulling on some shorts before exiting the tent. The sun felt like it was brighter than usual. The sound of cicadas more prominent in the air. I walked to the camp, watching as Andrea and Shane got into the Hyundai and left. Lori watching with her arms crossed. Carol was watching Carl, who’d been helping her carry the washing back from the makeshift line we had made. I walked closer to Carol and Carl, my hand messing up his hair, causing him duck and pout, putting the basket to the ground. “Hey!” He whined as he did his best angry impression, quickly dropping his act, smiling widely. “Hey yourself kiddo.” I smiled as he hugged me gently. Carol smiled at the two of us, as she separated the washing into piles on the table. “(Y/n), can we hang out today?” Carl asked, a hopeful smile on his freckled cheeks. “I don’t see why not, just make sure you ask your mom first.” I smiled as I helped Carol seperate and fold the washing. “Ill do it now!” He claimed, quickly bee-lining to Lori, who turned as she heard him calling for her. She smiled and hugged her son, looking down as he spoke. “What’s going on with you two?” I turned to look at Carol, who was looking down as she folded a pair of jeans. “With who?” “You and Lori.” She nodded. “Dont think I haven’t noticed.” She began, sighing as she turned to look at me. “We had a disagreement.” “There is more to it than that.” She chuckled, placing a shirt on top of one of the piles. “You guys were inseparable, the past week you guys have barely looked at each other, let alone speak to one another.” “Things change, People change.” I shrugged.

“I’ve noticed a lot of that too.” She nodded. “What do you mean?” “Without Sophia around, all I can do is observe.” She blankly stared ahead. “Carol-“ “Please, I don’t need anymore sympathy.” She smiled softly. “Go, don’t leave him waiting.” She motioned to Carl who was running back, his hat now perched on his head. I smiled and nodded, turning to hug her. “If you need anything-“ “I know honey.” She nodded.

I turned away from Carol and watched as Carl started walking toward the house.

“Did you ask your mom?” I asked a small smile evident. “Yeah! She said it was okay! Come on! Lets go!” Carl smiled. “Okay, okay!” I laughed following him. “Now what can we do?” He looked up grinning. “Well, we could go inside, play Scrabble, Monopoly, maybe read a few books.” I shrugged, smiling down at the boy. “Can we go somewhere?” “And where would we go?” I asked looking down at him with a questioning smile. “I don’t know, we could go for a hike!” He exclaimed as we walked up the stairs. “I think we can do that.” I smiled. As we got closer to the door, it opened. Maggie smiled at us as she held the small basket to her hips. “Hey.” She smiled at Carl looking up to me and nodding to the basket. “I was just about to look for you.” She nodded. “Oh?” “Yeah, im going to head up and give these to the horses, was going to see if you wanted to come with.” She smiled, lifting the basket up, showing Carl and myself the apples that filled it halfway. “Can I feed them?” Carl quickly spoke. I looked between Maggie and Carl. Maggie smiled and nodded. “Yes!” She exclaimed excitedly. “That would help me out a lot actually.” She smiled handing the basket to Carl. “You guys can go give them these and I can stay here and do some work.” She grinned as he smiled wider than usual. “Cool!” He nodded. Maggie nodded, walking back inside a smile prominent on her face.

“This is going to be so cool!” He beamed, excitedly making his way to the stable with the basket. “Have you seen these guys?” I asked. “The horses?” He asked pausing. “Not yet, I mean i have seen them, but I haven’t been near them.” He smiled. I smiled as we continued making our way to the stable.

Once we got to the stable, Carl stopped, smiling as he looked up at me. “You ready?” I asked. He nodded, quickly walking ahead once more.

I looked over to the right stall, smiling as I saw the familiar face looking at me. A loud whinny sounded as I stepped towards the stall. “Hey girl.” I smiled Betsy’s neck extended over the gate, searching for my hand, nudging it when it was within reach. Betsy nickered as my hand softly patted her neck. I chuckled softly as she sniffed my head. “Woah.” I turned to see Carl watching as Betsy and I greeted each other. “Carl, meet Betsy, Betsy meet Carl.” I smiled softly, motioning for him to come closer. Carl stepped closer, standing beside me, smiling as Betsy dipped her head and sniffed his shirt, moving down to the basket and taking an apple and splashing the two of us in a small shower of apple juice. Carl laughed and stepped back. “What is this one named?” He asked motioning towards Nelly. “This one is Nelly.” I smiled, moving over to the next stall. “Nelly.” He repeated, following me. Nelly extended her neck and leant over the gate, sniffing both Carl and myself, moving to the basket like Betsy did, taking an apple.

Both horses neighed, raising and lowering their heads as Carl placed the basket to the floor. I leant down, grabbing an apple and holding it flat on my palm. “If you want to feed them, make sure your palm is flat.” “Why?” “So they don’t accidentally bite you.” I smile. “So I hold it like this?” He asked, showing me his palm. He held the apple flat in his palm, raising both the apple and his palm up to Nelly’s face. I moved over and lowered his hand.

“Let her reach down.” I smiled as she hesitantly reached down to eat the apple.

I moved my palm down and to the side, watching as Betsy reached down and took the apple happily.

Carl began to giggle as Nelly took the apple. “It tickles.” He continued to giggle and slowly removed his hand as she took it. “It does a bit, doesn’t it?” I asked smiling as we both picked up another apple.

Both horses were happy by the time we left, both of them moving away from the gates and further into their stalls. Carl smiled the entire time, his face scrunching up each time Nelly or Betsy took an apple from his palm. Making our way back to the house carrying the basket I slowed down.

“How are you holding up kid?” I asked, my hand patting his shoulder. “I’m okay.” He paused. “I don’t like that guy.” “What guy?” “The one in the barn.” “How’d you know that’s where we’re keeping him?” “I’ve been following dad and Shane.” “Carl.” I paused, sighing as I look at the ground. “It isn’t safe, going near the barn with out someone, going near the barn in general.” I stopped. Carl stopped walking, looking up at me. “I just don’t want him to hurt you, or my mom.” “I know buddy, but your mom and I don’t want him to hurt you.” “I know how to use a gun now.” I nodded and smiled softly. “Can you promise me that you won’t go near the barn again?” I asked. “But dad-“ “Your dad is an adult, and he is our leader.” I paused, grinning as I lean slightly down. “Dont tell Shane that.” I joked, earning a small smile from him. “Okay, I won’t go near the barn again.” He smiled. “Thank you.” I smiled, bringing him in for a hug. We made it to the front porch smiling and laughing with each one another, when Carl stopped. “Carl, what’s up?” He shook his head, sitting on the steps. I placed the basket on the porch and sat next to him, slightly nudging him. “Come on, you can talk to me.” I smiled softly. “Do you hate us?” He asked, looking down at the ground.

It had felt like my heart had cracked, looking at the boy in front of me sadly watching the ground.

“What? Why would you ask me that?” I asked softly, moving my hand to his chin, getting him to look at me. “You don’t hang around us anymore.” He shook his head, pausing. “Did I do something wrong that made you not want to be around us anymore?” He asked gently. “No, not at all Carl! Come here.” I shook my head, bringing him in for a soft side hug.

“You didn’t do anything honey.” I paused, sighing. “Your mom and I has a little disagreement, and I’ve been giving her some space.” “What was it about?” “The disagreement?” I asked, he nodded. “It wasn’t anything that you need to worry about, it will all be okay.” I smiled.

Footsteps pounded on the floor inside of the house, the front door bursting open. Turning I see a flustered Lori.

“Carl!” “Mom-“ he stuttered. “Where have you been?” She asked rushing over. “I’ve been with (Y/n).” He shrugged, standing up.

I stood up, as Carl was swept into a hug from Lori. “You had me worried sick!” She exclaimed. “You didn’t tell me where you were going or who you were with!” “Mom-“ “No Carl, let me finish.” She raised her palm. “You went behind my back and went with (Y/n), after I told you no.” “What?” I asked softly, confused with what she had said. “Mom-“ “Go to the tent Carl. I will be there to talk to you in a minute.” “But.” “Carl I won’t say it again. Go.” She shook her head.

Carl huffed and left, running to the tent.

“Lori, I swear I-“ “I don’t care about whatever it is you’re about to say. Stay away from my son.” She shook her head. “Excuse me?” I asked. “I told him no, for being with you today and I thought you’d respect me as an old friend, if not his mother, than to let him go with you against my answer.” “Carl told me that you said it was okay.” “Are you calling my son a liar?” “No Lori, im not. Im telling you what I was told. I would never have taken Carl anywhere knowing that you didn’t want me to.” “Please. You’d do It just to spite me.” “You really think that low of me?” I asked, a small scoff coming from me. The door opened, Maggie and Andrea stepping out of the door, watching us both silently. “I don’t know what you took him to do or what you told him.” “I didn’t tell him anything.” “Please, any chance to trash talk me and you’d do it.” She exclaimed. “No, I wouldn’t do that to you! I missed Carl.” I tried to reason with her. More people joined the audience. “Dont lie to me!” “Im not! I took him to feed the horses!” “After I told him no!” She yelled at me. “I didn’t know that you said no!” I matched her tone. “I don’t know what you’ve told him, or what lies you’ve said about me.” She sneered. “Lori, please, stop.” Rick came in from the side. Shane stood forward, his hand gripping my arm. “I don’t know why you don’t get this through your skull!” I paused.

“I didn’t tell him anything!” I defended myself. “I doubt that you didn’t.”

Shane began to drag me away. “Enough.” He growled as I shook him off of me. “Today was about hanging out with my nephew! But as usual Lori, everything has to be about you.” I scoffed, turning.

Numerous gasps were heard as I turned.

There was a slight ringing in my ear, as my face began to throb. My hand reached up to my face, cradling it as I tried to regain focus.

I could taste the blood that began to trickle into my mouth from my nose.

My vision began to clear up.

Looking up I see Lori looking beside me horrified. Following her gaze I see Shane being tackled to the ground, a familiar vest holding Shane against the ground. I felt someone behind me, slowly guiding me as I watched Daryl punch Shane. “What-“ “Shh, We’re bringing you inside.” I could faintly hear Andrea speak. “Dad!” Maggie yelled as I was guided inside. Maggie frantically ran from room to room, coming back with a wet cloth. “What happened?” I asked as Maggie squatted in front of me, lifting my head slightly, gently wiping my top lip.

“Your brother punched you.”

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[theravencawsatmidnight]

The Sendai Frogs Unofficial Fan Club.

“Remember! We love each member equally! We cheer our hearts out! We go to every game! We support them no matter what!”

Part One.

W! Dark themes, manipulation, branding. Nsfw

You were watching a video on the Sendai Frogs on the internet when the ad came up, it read ‘ join the unofficial Sendai Frogs Fan Club!!’ In bright green letters.

Curiosity got the better of you and you clicked on the ad, it seemed pretty legit, the way it was filled out and you were a really big fan of this team so..

You clicked on the Join button and started to fill out the form.

—

A little later that same night in a dark room with the only light being a computer screen , two guys were browsing the internet. They did not talk much to each other one was jealous of the other and usually angry about something. But they did have one thing in common.. and that thing kept them from killing each other.

An eager feminin voice broke the silence though.

“So the ad is up right?!?”

“Yes Amber.” A deeper voice said, annoyance falling off his lips. “Now we wait.” He reached down between his legs to rub the girls head.” You know we love you right?”

“Uh huh !!!”

“You better, these ads cost alotta money.” Said another voice.

“Yes Mr Kyo, i know, i'm sorry for asking.”

Kyotani smirked down at the girl and Kei pushed her to his cock again till her nose was touching his chest.

“Mmf.. you gotta pay us back for these somehow.” He grinned down at the girl watching her do her best to work on his cock.

“Im next, Kei” Kyotani told him

“Just go get Yuki.”

“Yuki cant suck dick for shit.”

“Hey!!”

The men looked behind them to see another girl on the bed , she turned a light on looking grumpy. “I try my best! “

Kyotani rolled his eyes looking back at the screen in front of him, he was hitting refresh over and over. Kei also ignored the girl and Yuki got up stomping over just to get between Kyos legs to jerk him off.

Both men looked at each other smirking, what a club .

*******

Kyo was still hitting refresh not paying much attention to Yuki, he never gave her attention and she seemed to get a kick out of that for some reason so whatever. Kei had grunted under his breath after a minute and pulled Amber off of him tossing her to the side and fixing himself.

“Nice right Mr Kei?!?”

“Always.”

“Hmph.” Yuki pouted at Kei and he placed his hand on his head smiling down at her.

“Hmm?”

“I'm good too!!”

Kyo was paying zero attention, just hitting refresh over and over .

“But you wanna be better right?”

“Yes Mr Kei!!”

A ‘!’ Appeared and a frog hopped onto the screen waiting for Kyo to click him.

“Maybe Amber can show you how to do it the right way. In exchange we will take you along on our trip against Argentina .” He said, reaching down to rub Yukis cheek.

“Ya meen it Mr Kei?!?” Amber and Yuki asked him.

“Yes yes, whatever.”

“We got one.” Kyo said . “Guess who's the favorite this time.”

Kei looked up reading the application then looked at Kyo. “Must be a typo.” He teased getting up from his seat to stretch.

“Fuck off, “ Kyo put your number in his phone and pushed Yuki off him , -never any good- .. he adjusted himself and got up too. “Looks like we get to initiate a new member.”

Both girls hugged the men thanking them over and over. Kei and Kyo could not be more excited, the new ones were the funnest to break in , the more terrified they were the harder it was to get in their head, Kei loved that part of this ‘club’ .

Kyo though.. was aggressive and placed fear in their hearts in his own way, and since he was your favorite.. then this would be alotta fun..

*

In the morning you were woken up by a phone call and an unfamiliar voice. They sounded a little angry but the way they said certain words it .. sounded playful and eager, almost like they were luring you in.

“Y/n..?”

“Who is this?”

“Kyotani of the Sendai Frogs.”

“ ky..KYO!!?”

“Mhm. I'm going to text you the address so we can meet up.”

“I.. to.. today? Now? I .. your my favorite i . I'm not sure how to react.”

“I'm excited to meet you y/n, i've been waiting a long time.. to be the favorite.. you wont stand me up will you?”

“No-no! Im on my way..!”

“Thats a good y/n.”

He hung up and you flew outta bed to get ready.

**

Kyo was busy on the phone with you and Kei was setting something up on a table , his eyebrow was twitching from the crying behind him.

“Shut them up Amber!”

“Yes Mr Kei!” Amber opened a door skipping in to see Kera and Missy holding each other in a trembling state. They were chained to a bed and had dirty clothing on. Amber pat their flinching heads smiling at them. “Mr Kei is trying to get things ready for our new member! So be quiet kay?”

Neither of them could talk , they were gagged and Bound . “I dont wanna have to go get My Kyo!” She smiled tilting her head.

Both girls got quiet and Amber jumped. “Yay!”

“If you just accepted the Frogs like the Oath says you would be free right now.” Yuki said from the door.”

“More for us!!” Amber cheered .

“Ill be back.” Kyo said, putting his phone away.

“Oh yay!” The girls yipped running over to hug him.

“Bring everything you need” Kei reminded him. Kyo grunted and slammed the door where Kera and Missy were , he shook off Yuki and Amber too before leaving.

***

You were waiting at a parking lot to meet up with Kyo wearing a skirt and long sleeve shirt and flats. It was strange to meet here but you just wanted to see Kyo so you didn't mind.

A car cruised next to you and the door opened to reveal Kyo to you. You were so excited you ran over and hugged him. Kyo put his arm around your head whispering in your ear. “Nice to meet you too y/n.”

“ im.. !! I !! I mean!! Your so cool Kyo i..!!!”

He smiled, still holding you. “How nice. I think you dropped something though.”

“I did?” Slowly you let go and turned around not seeing anything. Kyo wrapped a hand around your hips and brought his other hand up to your face pressing a cloth too it.

“Easy.. easy..” he whispered. “You look so pretty like this…” you started to go limp.

“I.. do..?”

“So beautiful.” Kyo held you in his arms and gave you a kiss. “So pretty, my own little doll.”

Everything went black..

*****

You woke up unable to move your wrists and knees next to your head , looking up was still foggy but it looked like someone was sitting there and holding your wrists down . You blinked a few times when a big light was turned on above you. Your eyes slowly focused to see a happy brunette girl was sitting by your head holding you down .

“ shes awake!” Yelled the girl.

Footsteps got louder causing a ringing in your ears, Kei leaned down to look you over with a happy blond next to him.

“Morning Y/n, thank you for answering our ad”

“I.. wha..?” Everything was still foggy for you in your head.

“Maybe Kyo used too much”

“ shut up no i didint.”

“Kyo..”

he came over to tilt your head to him , he lightly rubbed at your cheek while he spoke . “I'm right here, sshh..”

“ whats.. i cant move.”. you were staring at him, everything seemed scary right now, but looking at Kyo helped.. somehow..

Kyo lifted your right leg and Kei pushed your skirt up smiling at what he saw.

“Nnh..”

“ shh.. you wanna be in the club right?”

“Y-yes..”

“Then say the Oath!” The blond said. “Repeat after me!”

A buzzing sound alerted you and you lifted your head to see Kei holding a tattoo gun.

“Remember! We love each player equally!!” The blond said .

“Re.. member we love each playERRR -“

Kei pressed the gun into your inner thigh, brushing his knuckles into your clothed heat.

“E..equally…” what was happening ?!?

Kyo rolled his eyes at that . Bull shit, that first Oath was bullshit. He squeezed at your thigh and rubbed the sweat from your head. “It wont be much longer..”

“We cheer our hearts out! We go to every game!!!” Yelled the blond.

“We..” it was very hard to concentrate on this girl, Kyo and Kei.. somehow you got the words out, between crying from the pain and losing your breath.

“We support them no matter what!!!!”

This.. this was not a club…

“ we.. support them..” you whined loud from the pain and Kei pulled away to lean up and lick your tears. “Support them no matter what..”

The frog on your inner thigh said it all.

This was not a club.

It was a cult.

**

@squeaky-ducky @zeroended @knifeewifee

[dazed--xx]

Beside you

Request: Hello could I have an arranged marriage with Jungkook with a bit of angst but fluff at the end. Thank you xx

Summary: "You may kiss the bride" The hesitation evident on his face. My heart is racing and reality sets in “um…Jungkook?” He rolls his eyes and places a light kiss on my lips. His lips brush against my ear as he whispers “Just know this will be the last time you ever get to kiss me." 

Genre: ANGST, light fluff, smut

TW: None

Word Count: 5,092

A/N: SO i know you specifically asked for fluff at the end but i dont think this is the end of this i might make a part 2 if part 1 gets enough traction any way. I hope you enjoy the few bits i did do from what you asked REQUESTS ARE OPEN 

edit: REWRITE UPLOADED 10/13/2021

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““You may kiss the bride” The hesitation evident on his face. My heart is racing and reality sets in “um…Jungkook?” He rolls his eyes and places a light kiss on my lips. His lips brush against my ear as he whispers “Just know this will be the last time you ever get to kiss me.” Tears begin stinging my eyes, as we walk down the aisle as an officially married couple, hand and hand, much to Jungkook’s dismay. We rush through the double doors of the church and disappear in the car placed in the front if the building of worship.   

Once we got in the car Jungkook retracted his hand and the empty feeling takes over again. Jungkook doesn’t love me this is just a business inconvenience to him. IM just some stupid business deal, something for Jungkook to correct as he does with all his other projects, only difference is I’m not some company he can break apart and sell. I’m a person as much as he refuses to accept it. Since our fathers have agreed the only way Jungkook would be able to acquire and run my father’s company is if I become is wife as some type of fail-safe of preventing Jungkook from selling off the company and running away like he’s done so often after his business dealings. 

At the reception Jungkook disappeared as soon as we walked through the door. To the bar as expected of him to drink as I’m in need of liquid courage to make it through the rest of the night. Slowly I make my way around the room greeting Jungkook’s family, as he sits with the vixen of a bartender, a sensual smile plastered on his face with a rum and coke in his hand. “Y/N you have to tell me… are you and my Jungkookie going to give me grandchildren.” His mother asks smile on her face, excitement evident. I feel the words get caught in my throat, GRANDCHILDREN? WITH HOW HE TREATS ME…...? HELL, NO THAT MAN IS NOT TOUCHING ME. As if on cue my eyes shift to look for Jungkook at the bar but he and the bartender are no longer there. Of fucking course, he took HER somewhere to fuck at OUR wedding.  Almost immediately after your disappointment of a wedding, you’re shipped off on your honeymoon. You spend most days in Mykonos, alone Jungkook wanting to explore Greece with beautiful Greek women.  

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The last night of your honeymoon Jungkook crashes in your shared room drunk off his ass, a loud laugh escaping his lips as he shushes the mirror next to the entrance. “Fuck be quiet Jungkook don’t wake up Y/N remember” He scolds himself. You can hear the childish groan that releases from his lip “No I wanna wake up Y/N.” Your eyebrows furrow, at his drunken figure. Did he not see you on the couch? “Jungkook?” you asked confused. His head whipping around quickly; a huge smile plastered on his face “Y/N!! I got you wine and a couple of more things” He exclaims staggering across the room “I-I shouldn’t be the only one having fun on our honeymoon right” taking a seat right next to you on the couch as he drops a brown bag in your lap. “O-oh um” “Please.... I wanna have fun with you, it’s so boring to keep talking to people I don’t understand and don’t understand me.” You sit there in shock just staring at his openly chatty self “Please take some shots get drunk with me you never let loose” He begs as he reaches in the bag on your lap pulling out some nips.  

After a while you and Jungkook find your drunken selves on the beach, Jungkook laughing as you struggle to walk with the sand beneath your feet. Music rang in the air from one of the clubs near your villa, “Dance with me Y/N” Jungkook exclaims as he grabs your hand pulling you into his frame. His hands finding their way to your waist, guiding them against his hips. A soft groan releases from his lips as your drunken form begins dancing to the music. Turning yourself around pressing your ass against his now hard member.  

Both of you completely oblivious to the sensual way your bodies move against each other. Jungkook's hands firmly placed on your waist, His head resting on your shoulder as your hand reaches behind you. You find your fingers interlocking with his hair. His right hand wrapping around your chin as he angles your head so you are facing him. “I’m having a lot of fun Y/N” lips centimeters apart, the scent of whiskey, and vodka radiating off of him. ‘Brown and clear...You’re gonna have one hell of a day tomorrow Kookie’, you thought. His eyes drift to your lips as he brushes his thumb over your bottom lip. Your lips part slightly, his bottom lip finding its way in between his teeth as he leans in.  

‘He’s drunk Y/N you can’t take advantage of that he would be ignoring you right now if he wasn’t,’ you tell yourself trying to find the strength to reject his advances despite everything inside of you screaming to let him kiss you. 

You pull away quickly “I-I should get to bed I'm really tired” you state shyly as you rush back toward your villa. Jungkook’s trailing behind you, Once you reach your villa he finally speaks “thank you” you turn to look at him confused “F-for what?” 

He smiles “Hanging out with me, I don’t know being my friend even though I don’t really deserve it” You look at him sadly “You’ve been going through a lot being forced to marry someone you don’t love or can't even stand” He furrows his brows as he shakes his head “I can stand you Y/N, What I can’t stand is the fact that my father cares so little about me that he basically sold me off to your family. You had nothing to do with that you were a pawn in this just as much as I was” You nod slightly “I want us to try to be friends again, Jungkook” He rubs the back of his head looking at the ground “We haven’t been friends this entire time” 

“No idiot I meant like when we were in high school, except for the revenge porn stuff” You state matter of factly. You can see the way Jungkook shifts on his feet, anxious at the memory. “Oh- yeah of course you were my best friend and I really hated losing you like that honestly I was going-” You smile at him softly “Well we should get to bed, you’re really drunk and the past is the past we should leave it there no point in bringing up old possibly painful memories for both of us” You turn yourself around and make your way over to the bedroom in your shared villa. Since, you both have gotten to Greece you have been the one to sleep in the grandiose bed. You can hear Jungkook tossing and turning on the couch, since for the first time in 2 weeks Hes actually sleeping in your shared villa. You make your way out of bed and approach him “You should take the bed Kookie, you'll be really uncomfortable if you don’t and being hungover in an uncomfortable place isn't fun.”  

“N-no” He slurs, “T-the bed I-is for you it’s the least I can do since I’ve been a dick” You shake your head rapidly, yes you were a little tipsy but Jungkook was FADED; You still can’t help the way your heart races at his politeness. “I’ve slept in it every day so far, I don’t mind the couch tonight” Jungkook crosses his arms and pouts “S-so you don’t want to sleep next to me” you stare at him confused “I-I haven’t the whole trip Kook-ah" “I know” the pout on his face staying there “I wanted you to though, I hated waking up in some random room or house with a woman whose name I can’t pronounce” He whispered “Why did you then?”  

He groans as he stands up, grabbing your hand in the process and dragging both of your figures to the room. Jungkook continued to mumble under his breath. You can only catch the last bit of what he’s saying “I want to sleep next to you” you are about to say something when he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you in to the large bed. “I want to hold you” He drunkly confesses “We used to cuddle all the time before; now you don’t even look at me and I hate it.” Youre stuck in a trance as he rubs circles on your waist. “I miss you Y/N I was so happy when my –hiccup- dad told me I was marrying you.” “You treated me like trash the whole time” you mutter. “I didn’t want to fall in love with you again, you only get hurt when I do” he whispers. “Jungkoo-” Your statement is cut off by his light snores and shallow breaths; He’s sleeping.  

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After your honeymoon you and Jungkook’s relationship has improved. He helped you move your things into the home his parents bought for us. Honestly none of us could even believe Jungkook actually came to the wedding let alone stayed in the house were supposed to share. 

 I’ve taken over the second bedroom to gain some solace from the hurricane that is his temper. There were days I would be greeted with Jungkook’s beautiful smile and the calmness would contain me. Others I’d walk out of my room and have a foreign object thrown in my direction. Jungkook and I would hang out on those days and talk until the sunset. Every morning I would have a cup of Jungkook’s favorite tea ready and set for him to begin his day properly.   

One morning I woke up extremely early, honestly at an ungodly hour. Tonight, was a particularly bad night, after our drunken adventure in Greece, Jungkook's drunken form rarely sought me out. Tonight, I figured would be no different. Until Jungkook came in the house and began taking his anger at our situation out on me. “YOU! YOU FUCKING DID THIS TO ME. YOURE THE REASON I CAN’T LIVE MY DAMN LIFE FUCK Y/N WHY CAN’T YOU MAKE THIS EASIER FOR ME AND DISAPPEAR” He shouted at you, deciding it was best to just ignore him and go to your bedroom. I can hear as he slams his bedroom door behind him.  

 After many attempts to fall asleep fail, I decide to go for a walk. As I run out the door, the world outside takes me over. I didn’t even realize how long it actually has been since I’ve left the house alone. The autumn wind rushing through the air as you make your way down the street. I find my mind drifting back to the days before your family informed you of the dowery. Jungkook hates you for being his wife but loves you for being his friend. I don’t understand anymore. My feet just move as I drift deeper into thought.  

The emotions I’ve been holding in begin to flow out as the tears burn my eyes. Finally feeling the pressure and change from this marriage. Losing track of time as I sit on a bench looking out to the Han River. The water is peaceful. The sounds of the city embrace me as I stare into the sunset. I don’t notice the hours pass until I begin to see traffic in the park pickup. I stand from my place on the bench and walk toward the bridge. Staring over the edge you contemplate jumping. Making everything easier on everyone. You feel utterly lost as the tears rush down your face. Shaking your head rapidly “no” you tell yourself as you make your way back, back to Jungkook, back to the life I no longer feel like leading.   

As the house came into view, and I saw 2 unfamiliar cars in the driveway. “Jungkook-ah I’m back is anyone he-” I shout as I walk into the house only to be cut off by the impact of Jungkook’s body colliding with mine. His breathing is heavy and a sigh of relief escapes him. His hands rushing to either side of my head as he looked me up and down. His chest heaving up and down rapidly. His eyes full of tears that were threatening fall. 

 “Fuck I thought something happened to you” he says examining my face. “Where were you? I woke up and tried to see if you wanted to go get breakfast and you weren’t answering the door, so I opened it and you weren’t there your bed is made where’d you sleep? I called your dad, man. I called MY dad” He doesn’t remember what he said to you last night. I smile at him apologetically as I notice the 2 men on the couch and I give them a polite bow. “I’m sorry Kook-ah I woke up really early and chose to go for a walk. I lost track of time and only made it home just now I’m okay; both of you did not need to take time out of your day to come here” you gesture toward your fathers. You can see Jungkook's father is completely stoic and uncaring, you avoid your fathers gaze as his figure trembled on the couch. 

“Y/N” Your father states just barely above a whisper as he looks you up and down “Dad I'm fine” You look at him, understanding his pointed worried gaze. “Y/N the last time you couldn’t sleep and went out for a walk I found you bleeding from your wrists in our neighbors pool” You can feel Jungkook's worried gaze on you. The awkwardness from the conversation growing around the room.  

“did that happen this time? and you have no right bringing that up it is a completely different situation” Your words do nothing to soothe him as you shove past Jungkook and lift your sleeves in his face “I’m fucking fine” You rush over to your front door slamming it open “Please excuse yourself, I'm tired and would like to go to bed after explaining to the husband YOU forced me to marry why I tried to kill myself, I apologize Mr. Jeon you did not have to take time out of your busy day to come here” Jungkook scoffs and mummers something under his breath. I walked the men out of the door, ignoring Jungkook’s hard stare at the back of my head as I said my goodbyes and apologized again.  

“Y/N” he whispered, you stood frozen in place at the front door. “What happened? Why’d your dad-” “It’s not particularly your business or your problem honestly Jungkook you’ve made it quite clear how you feel about me last night.” You cut him off curtly, finally making your way toward your bedroom “Y/N I was drunk last night I didn’t-” “WHAT ABOUT ALL THE OTHER NIGHTS” I shout “Look Jungkook, with the exception of our ‘honeymoon’ you don’t even want me around you drunk. You can’t stand to look at me and the ring on my finger knowing you got sucked into something you never wanted to do” Jungkook stood in his spot, trembling, “Y-Y/N it’s not like that-” “I don’t care anymore, honestly” You state curtly.  

“I'm your friend Y/N, do you not understand how fucking worried I was when I realized you weren’t here and I had no clue where you would go” I scoff at his statement “Maybe if you actually put effort into this ‘friendship’ You would have known” A pout forms on his already saddened face. “You’re right I should be a better friend to you and I will be” He promises.  

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Since that day, a few months back; Jungkook requests for me to let him know that I will be leaving so he does not start another panic; We’ve also dedicated Fridays as our friend date night, which usually just consists of us hanging out at our shared house watching movies and playing video games. As I exit the shower, Jungkook stops me as I walk toward my room “Hey, do you want to go out with me tonight?” Jungkook asks shyly. My heart sored at the question; I know he wasn’t asking in any romantic way. I just couldn’t help but get excited at the thought of leaving the house. I hadn't left much since moving in typically spending my days home or working, no time to really explore and go out “Yes! I mean yeah sure that sounds fun” I exclaim. After I have my hair out, in a wet curly look and throw on the most beautiful form fitting dress that I own and make my way to the door. Jungkook is standing there waiting on his phone. His eyes slowly scan up me and he swallows harshly as his eyes grow wide. “Uhm… Let’s…”  I smile at him and grab his hand and pull him out of the house interrupting him “Let’s go Jungkookie”   

The club was fun, Jungkook told me to have as much fun as I want since I rarely go out. Even so, I never leave the bar as Jungkook can obviously spot someone so he excuses himself from me exclaiming he will be back in like 10 minutes and runs off to the dance floor. Anxious about the crowd and my sudden loneliness; I pull myself into a dark corner at the end of the bar drunk patrons around me oblivious to presence. Feeling a hand on my ass and turn to see an unfamiliar handsome face. “Hey, um sorry to sound rude but can you like take your fucking hand off of me” I say shyly.  

The handsome man smiles and nods as he quickly pulls his hand off of my bottom “Sorry, I couldn’t get my footing with all the people I didn’t mean to…like touch you there I swear, I’m Mark” “Y/N” I say as I reach my hand out. He smiles and shakes my hand.” What are you drinking” He smiles “Malibu Pineapple” I reply politely. Mark orders me another and soon I’m feeling tipsy. His kind flirty personality only making you even more flustered, He smiles and places his hand on the small of your back as you talk. You check your phone only to see Jungkook has been gone for the better part of an hour; Mark’s deep voice pulling me out of my trance “SO… I hate to be THAT guy but are you here alone?” My eyes drift from my phone, my bottom lip pulled between my teeth. “Oh I-” 

Before I can respond I feel a hand snake around my waist and the melodic voice I’ve come to secretly love comes from behind me “No she’s here with me…… her husband” Jealousy laced in his voice as he pulls me closer to him. “And were supposed to be having a good time together…without you”   

“Sorry man, I didn’t know she was married. You know…since she was standing here by herself for a while, and it looked like she didn’t seem to mind spending time with me” Mark smirks sarcastically. The anger is growing more and more evident on Jungkook’s face. “Excuse me?!?” Mark shifts and smiles to me ignoring Jungkook’s ever growing angry form. “You trying to go somewhere less crowded you look really uncomfortable with how many people are here” “Oh I don’t know” I state shyly, stepping back a little. “What Y/N I'm just trying to be nice ill bring you home. I just don’t trust this guy you know? Who leaves their wife alone in a bar like this for over an hour?” It's obvious that was the last straw as Jungkook pulls me behind him as he punches Mark in the face. Mark returns the blow, Jungkook's large form stumbling back at the power the other man had. “You want to keep talking shit asshole” Jungkook's loud voice rings out as he charges Mark again. I stood frozen in place from Jungkook's forceful grab. The bar hitting my back.  Soon security was separating the brawl and me and Jungkook were in the car on our way back to the house.   

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In the passenger seat I take in the details of Jungkook’s now bruised face. I shift my eyes back to the windshield, a pout evident on my face “Why was he with you, Y/N?” Jungkook questions the tone in his voice is obviously a sad and jealous one. “He just came up to and we started talking he bought me a couple drinks that’s all Kookie, I promise.” I whine. It’s happened on occasion after Jungkook swore to make up for not being a good friend to you; you guys would flirt and be all over each other, yet neither would make a real move. “Would you have gone home with him? Would you have let him fuck you?” He asks scared of the answer. “WHAT? NO! Jungkook-ah I swear nothing like that would have happened. I mean Mark was really attractive and I’m sure he would have shown me a great time but I just wasn’t interested in him, kookie” That answer seems to have settled him for now. The drive now growing silent. “Y-y/n?” Jungkook slurs “Yeah” “You ever thought about it?” “What?” I ask confused. “Sex, with me” He asks shyly. “Um Jungkook? How drunk are you did you-” “No that doesn’t count I mean recently?” He stammers out.  

“Honestly?” He nods rapidly “Yes I need you to tell me the truth because I'm gonna kiss you and I'm not trying to get slapped” He confesses. My eyes widen at his drunk confession “Oh I wouldn’t slap you if you kissed me” He smiles slightly “really? Would you stop me if I touched you like I want Baby?” lust filling his tone as his hand placed itself inside your thigh slowly rubbing up toward my core. A small whimper is released from my lips. He takes his bottom lip between his teeth. “You want me to stop y/n?” He asks cockily. I shake my head rapidly. “You want my fingers inside you don’t you baby?” I nod rapidly. 

 “Don’t worry baby girl I’ll do that for you.” he says as he pulls into the driveway. He runs to the passenger door and opens it for me as I get out and wrap my arms around him. “Oh yeah Kookie? Are you gonna make me cum for you?” I smirk the drunk naughty thoughts take over. Jungkook wraps his arms around my waist and for the first time tonight I smell the alcohol coming off Jungkook. He’s as drunk as I am or even more so, he presses his chest against my back and I feel a hard shaft against my ass. He peppers kisses up the side of my neck until his lips reach my ears “mmm Baby girl, I wanna eat your pussy so bad” He smacks my ass harshly as he lifts me and carries me into the home.   

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I wake up in Jungkook’s bed the next morning, events from last night come rolling in. We had sex, 4 times, I notice the coldness on the side of the bed from me. I make my way out of Jungkook’s room and dash toward the kitchen. Jungkook is sitting at the table on the phone back to the entrance. “I don’t know Jimin we fucked like 4 times Jimin but that’s all she helped me cum and I helped her that’s all it was” “No I don’t have feelings for her, we used each other Jimin, it wasn’t like that this guy was talking to her at the club and she told me she wasn’t going to go home with him but let’s be honest if I wasn’t there, she would have gone with him and I can’t have some slut for a wife” 

 “No man I just helped her cum so she doesn’t start going out for some rando guy to get her off she doesn’t really expect anything from it. She just wanted to cum that’s how good little whores do it and from last night I know she’s one of the best sluts I’ve ever met so easy to get her to do anything for me cause she’s a sub” “Look I got to go Jimin before she gets up, I got to get he out of my bed before she thinks I want her there all the time…. dude of course I’m gonna fuck her again it’s one of the best pussies I’ve ever had……your stupid dude bye”   

I rush to my room and lock the door. His words stab at my heart. Just some easy slut? That’s what he thought you were, because you let your guard down and gave yourself to the first person you’ve ever had sex with. Tears stream down my face as I hyperventilate a knock at my bedroom pulls me out of a trance. “Y/n-ie?” another knock “you, okay?” I shout from behind the door. 

 “Yeah…I’m fine” I hear slight shuffling “Did you want to go to breakfast maybe we can take a walk to Han River you said you like going there right?” His nervousness is evident through the door. “Um…Honestly Jungkook, I’m not feeling too good I’m like really hungover and I’d like to take a shower” to wash your scent and touch off of me. “Oh…. well can I join you then?” I shake my head no, god please no. “Y/N-ie? Babe?” my heart shatters at his words “Um I’m sorry Kookie but I really don’t feel like it” “Oh okay, um when you’re done can you come hang out and watch a that Invisible Man movie you wanted to see” “Um sure I’ll see you in a bit bye Jungkook” Jungkook’s face twists in to a pout behind the door.  

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After your shower you leave the room and walk down the hall “Jungkook?” before I pass his bedroom, I peak my head in and see Jungkook laying on his bed completely naked, eyes closed tight, stroking himself, moaning out your name. The sight is addicting I feel my own excitement building up at the sight of him. I try to back out of the room and accidentally slam into Jungkook’s bedroom door. His eyes shoot open and his hand leaves his member. “Y/N! I…UM…I WAS JUST….” I smile and walk toward him. “We’re you thinking about me Jungkook” I teased. He bites his lip “Were you thinking about last night or the fact that you missed fucking me hard into the shower” He sighs and nods “both” he mutters. His words from earlier out of my mind as I place my lips against his and let him take me for the 5th time in 24 hours.   

The way he pounds into me, his hair stuck to his forehead. “Fuck baby girl you take it so good, look at your pretty pussy taking this cock the way you should…. hmmm that’s my pussy baby girl” I moan in response “yes kookie-ah only yours” My climax builds fast as Jungkook’s thrusts get sloppy. “Yeah, oh baby girl I’m gonna cum so deep in your pussy” He exclaims as he captures his lips into mine. “All mine baby girl” he thrusts once more and I feel a warmth inside me as he kisses my neck.   

He gets up and runs to the bathroom. A loud ping comes through on the phone

   Areum<3: When are you going to divorce that ugly ass wife? Baby I got to spend time with you at the club but fucking in a bathroom then getting kicked out for a fight especially over her is crazy.  

My breath hitches and swells up in my throat as I read the message. He had sex with someone last night right before he had sex with me, he took my mouth last night. Disgust fills me up as I run to my bedroom. Opening the closet, I begin throwing my things in the luggage bag. “Baby did you want- what are you doing?!” Jungkook stopped at my door, a confused look on his face. 

 “I’m leaving Jungkook” I state as tears stream down my face. Panic rises on Jungkook’s face “why? You don’t want to be here anymore? Did I do something? I can fix it I swear but you can’t go…you can’t just go when we….” “Areum misses you and you should focus on one girl Jungkook-ah” I cut him off and realization dawns on his face as he runs to his room to grab his phone.

 The second the phone is in his hand he rushes out of his room and sees your retreating figure making your way to the door “Y/N-AH! DON’T GO PLEASE” You freeze the sound of his voice cracking “Areum is just some girl she’s not anyone don’t just assume because some girl texted me, she misses me that I’m going to run to her” “You were with her last night….you Fucked her last night not even an hour before you fucked me, my mouth” 

Jungkook shakes his head “No it’s not like that I swear like you said I fucked her, Baby girl I can’t fuck you. I make love to you please I’m begging you don’t go okay I know we haven’t been the best but I can fix this don’t do this not when I know I love you please” I shake my head and make my way to the door as Jungkook’s sobs grow. “Stop please” he reaches for the door and slams it shut. “You can’t just leave, not after what we just did, not when I love you, please” I smile at him lightly and press my lips against his.

 I feel his hands snake around my waist as he kisses me hard. I lose myself in his lips soon I reach for my luggage bag and rush out the door and into my car. Jungkook is banging on my passenger side window trying to open the door tears streaming down his face “please, stop, stop the car, get out please stay with me, BABY PLEASE” he shouts as I reverse and drive off the last sight, I have is Jungkook chasing my car with tears streaming down his face   

[carnalpleasure]

this one turned out way longer than i expected and it’s too long to post under a cut??? idk how tumblr works ok. but you finally get a lil taste of warlock!richard🔥😏 or would it be hawthorne!richard ?

anyways i think this ones pretty cute and im even more excited to go write the next part <3 thank u to everyone thats read this far 🥺 ILY

Light My Fire

The Warlock Council had been eagerly anticipating the arrival of their newest student. They’d planned to meet Richard bright and early that morning, but Michael insisted on letting him sleep in and rest up. So Ariel reluctantly postponed the meeting until all the classes were done for the day. And yet, they still were late to arrive. The master warlocks were quickly losing patience as they sat in their usual conference hall, once again debating on whether or not Richard even belonged there.

“Baldwin, you’re being naive,” John Henry said, his frustration evident in his voice. “The boy doesn’t possess any powers, he is being possessed,” he urged.

“How can you be so sure, John Henry?” Ariel interjected. “You said the same thing about Michael and look at what an asset he’s turned out to be.”

“I’m still not convinced on that one yet either,” John Henry muttered.

They had been debating this ever since Ariel received the tape from a frightened nurse at the clinic. She didn’t want anything to do with Richard anymore after seeing that footage, but she didn’t have the heart to turn him into the authorities since they couldn’t prove he was responsible either. Ariel and Baldwin only wanted to believe that the young boy was a powerful, promising warlock. While John Henry and Behold were less optimistic, believing it to be just a typical case of demonic possession.

Just as John Henry was taking out his pocket watch again to check the time, the tall arched door creaked open, echoing through the halls of the hallow room. Michael walked in first while Richard stood hesitantly in the doorway, his messy bangs partially hiding his face. Michael turned back to him, nodding for him to follow. “Come on,” he said softly, coaxing him in. The quiet brunette rushed to his side, like a shy little kid clinging to his mom’s leg in the grocery store.

“Richard! We’re so glad you made it! How was the trip?” Ariel perked up as soon as he saw the boys, quickly forgetting all about the argument. He walked right up to Richard, putting his hands on the boys shoulders and giving him the biggest, fakest smile the pissed off boy had ever seen. He quickly took a step back, pulling away from Ariel’s grip and giving him a look of pure hate and disgust. He hated this guy already. He was so arrogant, the way he talked, treating him like an old friend when he’d never met this man. But putting his hands on him? That irritated him more than anything.

Ariel was either oblivious to his anger, or he was ignoring it. But he moved right on without skipping a beat. “Well then, gentlemen. Shall we proceed with the first test?” He looked back at the other three warlocks, as if waiting for applause. His voice was rich with excitement as he returned to his seat at the table. He seemed overeager and it made Richard uncomfortable. He scooted closer to Michael, shooting him a nervous look. The anxiety was nearly radiating off him at this point.

Michael put his hands behind his back, like how he always stood when he was observing something of importance. But he had a different reason for it this time. He snapped his fingers to discreetly get Richard’s attention, signaling him to take his hand. The brunette reached for his hand right away and the boys locked fingers behind Michael’s back without the other warlocks ever noticing. It helped a bit, Richard’s heart rate started to slow and some of the tension melted away.

The four master warlocks were sat at the table like a panel of judges. They all remained straight faced and silent as Ariel took over, proceeding with the test. “Now Richard, since it is your first time using magic, we’ll start small. Today’s test will be a simple one. Any level one warlock can eventually master this.” As if on cue, Baldwin produced a single candle and set it on the center of the table. Michael let go of his hand then. He moved his hand to the small of Richard’s back and lightly nudged him forward.

“Pyrokinesis,” Ariel announced, “The ability to-“

“I know what it means,” Richard interrupted.

Ariel paused, his enthusiastic smile turning cold. This boy was testing his patience, although he’d never show it. Ariel was a master of masking his emotions. “Such a smart boy,” he said dryly. “Well then, let’s see if you can figure out how it’s done. Light the candle.”

Richard froze. That’s it? No directions? No magic spell? How the hell do you start a fire with nothing? He wanted to find out how just so he could burn this ridiculous place down.

Michael’s hand returned to Richard’s lower back, the small touch assuring him he was still right by his side. “Concentrate,” Michael’s tone was soft and soothing. “Think of the wick as someone that’s hurting you, think about how you would focus your rage towards that person, then direct it there.” Richard tried to listen to his words but he couldn’t focus on the candle, or on Michael. All he could feel was the pressure building. These four powerful men had all eyes on him, waiting for him to practically perform a miracle. His heart started to pound again, his hands shaking, feeling like his skin was crawling.

Without thinking, he turned around and ran for the door, stumbling into the hallway and trying to remember which direction they came from. Michael immediately went after him, “Hey, wait. Come here,” he pleaded, reaching out to grab him gently by the arm. Richard tried to shake him off and pull away but Michael grabbed him with both hands and pulled him into his chest where the brunette collapsed in his arms instantly. He buried his face in Michael’s chest trying to hide his shame. His burning red cheeks and watery eyes gave it away. Richard never cried unless it was tears of rage.

“I’m not like you, I can’t..” he grumbled into Michael’s chest. The blonde had his arms wrapped around him, running a hand through his soft brown hair soothing him almost instantly. “You’re just nervous,” Michael replied, his tone soft and forgiving. “Let me help you,” he whispered pleading, his lips brushing against Richard’s ear lightly as he spoke. Richard’s whole body started trembling at the sensation. Feeling the boy’s sudden reaction gave Michael an idea.

He ran his hand carefully up Richard’s chest to his neck, slowly letting his fingers wrap around the boy’s throat. Richard’s eyes went wide, completely taken by surprise as he felt Michael’s grip tighten, forcing him to look up at the blonde. The look on Michael’s face was seductive yet sinister as he leaned in, painfully slow, pressing their lips together and kissing Richard for the first time. Ever. Richard had never been kissed before by anyone and the brand new sensation sent sparks flying. Literally.

Every candle in the entire corridor burst into flames and the whole room was suddenly illuminated in a bright orange glow. The chandeliers started to swing violently and the hallway was filled with warmth. They pulled away from the kiss just in time to see that last of the light show. The candles flickered wildly and the last sounds of crackling fire echoed through the halls.

“Did you do that?” Richard asked, looking up at Michael in shock. He started to get angry, feeling like he’d just fallen for a trick. But the blonde shook his head, beaming with pride as he looked back at the boy. “No, baby. That was all you.”

A look of confusion crossed the brunettes face, his brows furrowing together as he took a moment to process what just happened. After a minute his eyes shot up to meet Michael’s gaze again. “How did you know it would work?” he asked.

Michael smiled, “Magic is a feeling. I just needed to make you feel something.”

Richard thought about that answer for a moment before reaching up to steal another kiss, surprising Michael yet again. Then he grabbed the boy by the hand and dragged him back into the meeting room where the Wizard Council had begun packing up their things for the day.

“You came back,” John Henry said dryly. “We were beginning to think you checked back into the clinic.” Michael wanted to burn the guy’s face off for even saying such a thing. He shot John Henry a look that was just short of demonic, it was a warning more than an intimidation.

“I can do it now,” Richard professed. His body was still buzzing from the kiss and he felt more sure of himself than ever. The only thing that could possibly feel as good as this, would be wiping the smug looks of their faces now.

“You’re late, we don’t have time-“ Baldwin started to shut him down but Ariel waved a hand, signaling him to be silent. “Let’s be fair now, Baldwin. Give the boy another shot. Why not.” Ariel sounded sarcastic and uninterested, as if he didn’t believe Richard.

“Really, Ariel? What’s the point?” John Henry asked, taking out the pack of cigarettes he always carried in his breast pocket. He put one to his lips, but before he could even reach for his lighter, the tip of the cigarette sparked, lighting up and glowing cherry red. It took John Henry by surprise and he inhaled too quickly, sucking in a harsh cloud of smoke and coughing.

The other warlocks all turned immediately to look at Richard, looks of shock and disbelief on their faces. It wasn’t as big as the display Michael had just witnessed in the hall, that’s for sure. But it definitely got the point across and got their attention. Ariel’s face lit up and a smile formed from ear to ear.

“That was excellent, Richard! You passed your first test!” he said with a laugh, his ego skyrocketing as his suspicions about the boy were affirmed. It was a small display of power, yes. But it was a sure indicator that the power was there. And that was all Ariel needed to know to officially induct him into the prestigious school.

“It’s settled then! Tomorrow morning. You’ll start attending classes with Michael right away. The two of you have a lot of studying to do.” He put a hand on each of the boy’s shoulders, giving them a tight squeeze and looking at both of them like a proud dad would stare into the eyes of his sons. It made Richard feel unsettled, and Michael feel adored.

He dismissed the meeting then, sending the boys back to their room to get plenty of rest for tomorrow’s next test. As soon as they were out in the hall, Michael snaked his arms around Richard’s waist, pulling the brunette in close for another kiss. Richard put his hands on the blonde’s face, running them up into his hair and grabbing a fistful of his blonde curls roughly. “Come on,” he mumbled between kisses, “let’s go make some magic.”

💕taglist: @sexwon131 @jimmason @whatcodysaid @theneverendinghunger @angelicmichael @langdons-butterfly @thewarriorprincessxo

[docholligay]

Sleep, Sleep

I’m working on a real thing that is for a patron but it’s going slowly because *gestures vaguely* so please enjoy this shitty hurt/comfort I wrote to soothe myself. 1770 words, all of this universe is here for timeline or whatever

Fareeha Amari was not in the business of shirking responsibility. When she felt she had failed, she was the first to mark ways she could improve, and she was the first to notice the same in others. It was not so much that Pharah sought fault so much as she sought improvement, and the beginning to fixing a leaky roof was finding where the leak came from. But, on a handful of occasions in her life, she could simply admit that it had been a bad day. 

Sitting in a Talon cell, half out of her mind with the pain of torture and the exhaustion of resisting it, she could admit that it had simply been, one of those days. 

They had only been here two days entirely, Pharah thought. She had tried very hard to keep mark of the time. It was so easy to lose it, in these moments. Moira was helping her, she supposed. She kept a tight schedule, and if much of that schedule relied on when and how she chose to experiment on she and Tracer, well, at least she knew when tea time was. 

A more straightforward sort of torture, Pharah might have been able to bear better. But it wasn’t torture, not for information. Other people might care about that--the monster that had once been Gabe certainly got in their face enough--but Moira did not. It was experimentation, and even if they told her every secret they knew, it would not stop. Moira herself pretended little different. 

It would go on until they were rescued or died, and at least that gave them little reason to give any information at all. 

She sat the edge of the small cot provided to them. Tracer lay at the top of it, trembling, her body jerking every so often against her will. Pharah looked away from her. She told herself it was out of respect for Tracer’s general dignity, but even half-mad she knew it was a lie. She simply could barely stand to look. She hadn’t looked down at the stump where her metal arm should rest, either. It hurt. She knew it must look terrible. No reason to make it worse with visual acknowledgement. 

“F’reeha?” Tracer’s voice was soft and wobbling, ““‘M a bit poorly. I think.”

“You need to stop goading her,” Pharah shook her head, “Just lie still, and quiet. They will find us.” 

“What, and let ‘er come after you? Fuck off, then.” 

Tracer had the unique gift of being able to irritate a human being better than a mosquito at the ear, and she had employed this to great effect in Moira’s lab. She tortured them in tandem, which was a unique technique, if she meant to get anything from them, but perhaps it was that she knew the effect of seeing the other dissembled bit by bit was its own brand of horror. 

Pharah had not gotten the worst of it, because Pharah was not medically interesting. Certainly, she had Winston’s unique set of sensors in her shoulder, where a fully functional arm had been installed, but she’d seen enough of that with McCree. Pharah was fine, but Tracer was the real toy, and it didn’t hurt that Tracer was very good at making someone want to hurt her. And Moira had. She had taken great pleasure in it. 

Even Pharah herself, constantly surprised by her own emotions, had not understood what an effective method of torture it would be for her. 

Pharah lay her hand on Tracer’s leg. She could feel the twitch running though it. 

“Rest.” 

Pharah was not the most verbose human on her best day, and this was certainly not her best day. She wanted to tell Tracer it would be all right, that they would come and Mercy would mend what Moira had damaged. But who could know if it was true? Pharah had many faults, she thought, but she was not a liar. She wanted to tease Tracer, to set her at ease, but the words would not come. Pharah was more steel than anything else, in difficult times, and so her words were firm, and decisive, and formal, whatever she tried. It was a comfort, like a child’s blanket. 

A shock ran through Tracer, and she gasped, her back arcing against the cot. Pharah moved to her, and closed her eyes with the sharp, bright pain that moved through her body as she did so. She took a few deep breaths, did her best to ignore it, and rubbed Tracer’s shoulder until her body let her relax again, what could have been ten seconds but felt like hours. 

Tracer opened her eyes just a little, and looked up at Pharah. 

“We may want to consider the outside possibility I won’t be making it to the debriefing.”

“You cannot. That would leave me sole leader of Overwatch. Do you want that on your conscience?” 

Tracer cracked a weak smile. “Not me first choice, no, but” she swallowed, “But this isn’t what I expected to ‘appen, love. Didn’t know it would do this, it’s nothing like when I...anyhow, if I do...If I do..”

“Stop,” Pharah looked away from her and sighed, “I am not your errand boy. We are in pain, and we are tired.” She gave a chuckle, “And longing for the days when torture meant being beaten.” 

“God yes, “ Tracer closed her eyes, “love to be cracked across the jaw just now.” 

Pharah nodded, her hand still on Tracer’s shoulder. “When we escape, when they come for us, because, you see, I am an optimist. Not like you, who thinks Winston would leave you to die here.” 

“Don’t bloody bring ‘im int--” Tracer shuddered and tamped down a squeal of pain into a small squeak. “Oh Fareeha, I’m…” 

“A pessimist, yes.” she moved up her hand, gently rubbing the hair at the back of Tracer’s head, “I can see that. But when we escape, when we are saved, and you heal, because, remember, you have so many times before.” 

“Right,” Tracer gave a little nod and swallowed, “born under a lucky star.” 

“When you heal, I will take you to your horrible little pub, and play darts, and attempt to understand anyone in that godforsaken place.” 

Tracer gave a laugh, weak and small, but genuine, and Pharah grinned. 

“And I will fail. You know that, of course, and you will have to order for me. Again.” 

Tracer’s eyelids fluttered open, her vision hazy but more for Pharah’s benefit than anything. “It’s not as Isla can’t understand you, you know, it’s just the other way round.” 

Pharah shook her head. “I know you have some sort of magic word, for when all I want on this earth is a light beer.” 

“Right, and it’s ‘go somewhere else.’” 

Pharah ruffled her hair. “It’s sometimes easy for me to understand what Moira sees in you.” 

Tracer giggled. “Me own personal brand of charm, innit? Going to be a right shame when I can’t share mese--” 

She gasped, and let out a cry as her body twisted into one terrible contraction. 

“Lena!” Pharah went to move the arm that wasn’t there, and a wave of nausea and pain went through her, but she pushed it to the side, using her good arm to scoop Tracer onto her lap. Tears ran down Tracer’s face as she struggled to breathe against the spasm, Pharah unable to do anything but watch, and hope that her touch offered some comfort. 

Watching her lit a fire in Fareeha Amari, a deep coal seam of hot anger than would not dissipate until her child was nearly grown. She would nurse it and feed it, and never apologize for it, and it would take her years to remember that it had been lit in this exact moment. She never had a friend quite like Tracer, and she never would, because who could be said to be like her at all? And Moira had tortured her like a cat playing with a mouse, and Pharah would remember this, always. 

It released Tracer, and she lay panting on Pharah’s lap. A few moments passed, just the two of them nestled together, in a cold and dark cell, the dire nature of their situation hanging over them like a shadow. 

Tracer could not go on like this for too much longer, Pharah knew. Whatever Moira had done to her had hurt her badly, and she needed help. Pharah knew, in the same way, that Tracer would fight and snipe at Moira to her last breath, even if it accelerated its coming. Tracer could stop fighting like the sun could stop rising in the morning. She was a terrier to the bone. 

But she believed herself, that the team would be looking for them. D.Va was a natural leader when called upon, Winston would hardly stop looking for Tracer, McCree was constantly looking to be made useful, and even the newer team members had nothing but fondness for Tracer, and maybe even Pharah herself. 

Mercy, of course, would never leave Pharah behind. She knew that like she knew the moon still sat outside that cell, watching. 

“Fareeha…” 

“Rest now.” She arranged herself carefully, and pulled Tracer up to her shoulder, leaning against the wall, and wrapped her arm around her. “You want to be fresh to spit in Moira’s face.” 

“Love you, Fareeha” 

“Shut up.” 

She held Tracer close and began to hum and then sing, some Arabic lullaby drawn far from her childhood, though she couldn’t even remember where or when. Who would have sung to her? Maybe she was something better than the sum of her childhood experiences, or maybe there was a tenderness inside her she did not know, or maybe she had grown into something that could give a softer and sweeter fruit,  but in any case, she chose to think of it little in the moment. There would be time later, to wonder where it came from. 

Tracer could not have possibly understood the song, but it sank deep into her, and Pharah felt her sink against her shoulder as she slept, the words carrying her along and comforting her. 

Later, Pharah would not know how long she sang, or when she fell asleep herself, or even exactly when help came. This part of her life, these next few days, would be a blur, scattered with only moments of clarity. This would be true for all of her very long life. But she would remember the song, and she would remember the flickering lights and long shadows, and she would remember that she had been, a good friend. 

[shawnpetermuffins]

Misery Business (decode 2)

A/n: and the much requested part 2. Part 1 is in my masterlist under my song based fics. This will be the final part.

Summary: Shawn's finally starting to realize what this relationship has done to him.

Warnings: angst, swearing, the usual

Word count: 2.2k

***

I should be happy. My career has never been better, my singles are doing pretty great on the charts, I'm in the top 5 most listened to artists on spotify, and I'm getting loads of publicity hanging with Camila. And don't get me wrong, she's beautiful, hourglass figure that every guy wants, I guess. There's just something wrong and it's this, she's not y/n. I thought our relationship would withstand anything my career threw at us, I really did. But I should have known that she wasn't okay with this. I knew that there was always some kind of underlying territorial battle between her and the girl that's currently holding my arm while we walk down the street, but I ignored it for the sake of a few extra views on a music video, for a few extra streams.

This publicity thing has taken y/n away from me and no one seems to notice, or care, because the songs are doing so good. Since she walked away that night no one has talked about it. No one asked what was the final straw, it was just never brought up. And all that's going around Twitter and Instagram are these God awful, staged photos of me and Camila acting like we're so in love when in reality I am heartbroken and on the verge of a nervous breakdown in most of them. 

"They're looking," she says into my arm. "Kiss me now." She's been telling me to do that a lot more often recently and I'm starting to feel just how wrong it is for us to be doing this. She knows about the breakup, but it seems like she couldn't care less. She parades me around town and follows me on tour, adding a little too much tension between me, Brian and Connor who have barely spoken to me since y/n left. It's clear that they weren't on my side in this situation, but that didn't matter to Camila. She was eating the attention up. She loved knowing that people were talking and that they were talking about her, it apparently didn't matter in what context. 

"Andrew," I grab my manager's attention one night before he goes into his hotel room.

"Yeah, bud?"

I clear my throat, glancing over my shoulder to make sure no one was still out wandering the hall, listening. I lower my voice anyway, "How much longer do Camila and I have to keep up this PR game? The fans are starting to notice it's fake."

"We have to keep it up at least until the stadium show."

"What? What happened to it ending after the VMAs?" 

He shrugs, "Sorry. We need to sell more."

"The stadium's already sold out, what do you mean we need to sell more?!"

"Shawn, you said you were okay with this. What's going on?"

I lost the best thing that's ever happened to me because of this stupid game. That's what's going on. But I just sigh, "Nothing. Nothing, guess I'm just worried. I don't want the fans to lose interest. I can't keep ignoring the question."

"Well you can't talk about it. We're under contract. Now it'll be over before you know it. So for now, just enjoy it. Enjoy the publicity. You need it. Gets people excited for new music."

You know what else gets people excited for new music? Promotion.

---

I'm scrolling through Instagram, seeing all the photos fan accounts are posting of me and Camila, becoming more and more emotionally drained with each passing second. But then I see something that catches my eye. It's a photo of me and y/n, one of the only photos she allowed me to post of us. Except it's split right down the middle. I hurriedly look at the caption.

Fanaccount Is no one going to talk about the fact that we don't know how, why, or WHEN y/n and Shawn broke up??? Did we all just forget that they were together for 2 years?? What happened to our girl? 

Then I start reading the comments, which I shouldn't do, but I can't stop myself.

Fanaccount2 Idk if it's true but someone said she was still on tour with him up until like 2 weeks ago…

Fanaccount2 Do y'all think Camila had something to do with it?

She had everything to do with it.

fanaccount3 Who cares? He's with Camila and she's better.

Fucking liar. 

fanaccount4 I know we don't know what happened, but if it's because of C that's fucked up. Y/n deserves better. Shitty PR to sell a song that's already been at #1 for weeks?? If he lost her to this I feel bad for him. 

     Fanaccount5 But what about her? She had to watch all this go down? It was a really dick move for him to even think it was okay to do this.

   fanaccount6 Okay but look how happy he is with Camila. He clearly doesn't feel bad, so why do you???

Fanaccount4 THEY WERE TOGETHER FOR 2 YEARS! and now he's sucking face with his "best friend" come on. That's shitty and you know it.

I don't even realize that I'm crying until I can hardly catch my breath. I'm panicking. I haven't had to deal with a panic attack alone since y/n came around, but this is the third one I've talked myself out of since she left, and I've had to go back on my medication. I never realized that she was the main thing helping me through.

My phone buzzes with a notification - a message from Andrew. 

It's a screenshot of my spotify account and it reads: #2 baby!!

I want to hurl - my phone or the contents of my stomach, I'm not sure. Maybe both. But I guess, we've got the fans where we want them. 

But like we always do, in true Hollywood bragging, we post the screenshot to our Instagram stories. And Andrew to his feed and twitter. It's all working so well. They're buying it - the relationship, the song, everything. But when I look at my follower count and see I'm down at least 100,000… maybe not everyone is buying it.

---

We're in her hometown and every part of me wants to go see her, wants to make sure she's okay. Because I have the day off and it would be so easy to just drive out to her and make things right. But Camila won't leave my side and I'm going insane.

"Shawn, pay attention to me!"

And I snap. "What do you think I've been doing these past two months, Camila?! I've been paying attention! Jesus, fuck, give me just two minutes of alone time."

"Whoa! What's up your ass?" She crosses her arms over her chest.

"You!" I scoff, throwing my hands up.

"You've been moody all week. Do you want to talk?"

"Not to you," I mumble, but she hears me.

"You're serious? This is about y/n? It's been a month, Shawn. It's time to move on."

"Move on? How am I supposed to move on when she was the literal best thing to happen to me? When I lost her because of this stupid PR move that is in no way helping me anymore, Miss number two!"

"Now I don't deserve to be number two? Really?"

I don't say anything else, I just take my phone and wallet from the coffee table and leave without another word. I don't know where I'm going until I'm there at her doorstep, breathing heavily and running my clammy hands through my already ruffled hair. Before I can talk myself out of it, I knock on the door and wait, my hands in my pocket.

"Can you get that?" I hear her say to someone inside, but I'm not expecting it to be my own best friend.

"Brian?" I say, confused.

"What are you-?"

"Bri, did you? Shawn?"

"Connor?"

"Guys, who's at the…" she stops cold in her tracks when she sees me.

"Y/n," I sigh. I can't read her face. She could be any number of things, but shocked is probably the most accurate.

"Babes, can y'all give us a second?" Her arms cross defensively over her chest while the guys retreat to the kitchen. When she walks further into the living room, I let myself in, closing the door behind me. "What the hell are you doing here, Shawn?" 

"I miss you," I say desperately. "I - I know I fucked up. Severely fucked up. I put my career ahead of you and I said I'd never do that. The numbers became more important and it shouldn't have been that way. I'm so sorry. Just… please give me a second chance. Let me prove to you that you're first. Always."

"A second chance isn't going to do anything for you, Shawn."

"How do you-?"

"Because you're still pretending with her! If you're even pretending at this point! I can't be with you like this because if the numbers were all that mattered two months ago, who's to say they're still not going to matter three years from now? Your entire career revolves around them and I'm not going to be your number two. That isn't what I signed myself up for. Not to mention my Twitter mentions right now are your fans calling me a whore for standing in the way of 'Shawmila's true love!'"

I flinch, "I'll fix it."

"You can't!" She screams and I see the guys slowly make their way into the room. "Jesus, don't you get it? It doesn't matter what you think you can fix because I can't forgive you! I'm done. I'm over it. I don't want this!" She gestures between our bodies. "You don't want me, you want the familiarity. Well, why don't you teach her how to calm down your anxiety attacks. And tell her how you like your eggs in the morning, and how you'll only get out of bed after at least ten minutes of silent cuddling.

"And you go around town acting so fucking innocent, which no one believes, by the way. Teach her how to be your girlfriend, and how to do it right because clearly I wasn't doing it right," her voice cracks at the last part of her sentence and it breaks me in half. When the first year falls, I want nothing more than to take her in my arms, but I hold back, knowing damn well she doesn't want me near her.

"Y/n, it's not the same without you. The concerts aren't as fun, the days between drag on forever. I thought that being seen out would make the numbers rise, and yeah it has, but I'm losing more than im getting."

"That's not my fault. You did that." She wraps her arms around her, holding herself together. Just like I've always known her to. I notice that the tears aren't falling anymore either. She stopped then just as quickly as they started. 

"This isn't how I thought we would turn out."

She bites the inside of her cheek, her clear sign that she's distraught.  "You know, it's funny. It took me so long to realize that I was watching your dreams come true. Selling out arenas and winning awards and putting out awesome music. I watched all of those dreams come true. Not once did you say I was a reason for it. You always avoided the questions about if the songs were about me. I was - I was never part of your dream, Shawn. And I put mine on hold to watch you live yours. It's my turn," she looks at me with some type of fire in her eyes. "Its time for me to go for my dreams and watch them come true. I thought it was you. You were my dream for so long, but that's just not it anymore."

I suck in a shuddery breath, "no. Y/n, baby. Please."

"You need to go."

"Y/n," I reach out for her but I'm stopped quickly by my best friend.

"She told you to go, Shawn."

"I'm not leaving until we fix this."

"Just let it go, man. She doesn't want you anymore." Connor says from his same spot, only this time with y/n in his arms, her head buried deep in his chest. Seeing her in the arms of another makes me crazy and I lunge for him, but Brian pushes me back again. 

"You need to go. I'm not saying it again," he's practically dragging me out the house.

I point an angry finger at Connor, "You're fired."

"That's fine," he says. "Good luck with the rest of the tour." He shoots me a glare and then his attention is back to my sad ex-girlfriend. And I'm out the door before I realize it.

"What am I supposed to do?" I ask aloud because I feel Brian standing behind me, making sure I don't get any ideas to go back inside.

"Sounds to me like you need to reevaluate your priorities. You chose this career, and up until recently you were able to balance love and music. Find that again. Now go back to the hotel. I'll see you for soundcheck tomorrow." The door closes once again. But this time it's closing on everything that was and everything that could've been. I know I'm not getting her back. I chose the music business,  but now it's the misery business and there's no way to get out of it.

***

Tags: @curlyshawny @anamariel2301 @shawns-badreputation @bbellbagel @turtoix @ivegotparticulartaste @tomshufflepuff @dino-16-avocado @sleepybesson @lifeoftheparty74 @shawnssongs @luvluvxx

I hope you enjoyed it. I'm sorry for the angst. Like, reblog, and leave feedback!! 💙💙

[soundofseventeen]

13 Days of Christmas (Joshua Hong)

I am very tired, rip. gif credit to owners...im off to cure my cold

Word count: 1676

You wouldn’t call yourself the grinch, but you definitely hated the holidays. You couldn’t stand how the moment Halloween was over, Christmas trees were not only put up everywhere you turned, but the music seeped from the stereo and into your brain (and sometimes your dreams). And then there was the holiday shopping. There were people who didn’t deserve anything but you still had to get them something because you hung out with them. But then there were those who deserved everything the world had to offer, but you couldn’t afford that because the money in your bank account liked to laugh at you for even thinking it. None of that, however, compared to the ridiculous hours you had to work.

The worst job in the world, you liked to say, was retail. You didn’t mind dealing with people as long as they were friendly and didn’t send you into a panic attack after one interaction. They made your days bearable...and also not hate your job too much. But the ones who treated you like gum under their shoe or a roach they couldn’t kill made you wanna gouge your eyes out...or douse them in gasoline and set them on fire. You were fine with either option. It seemed like they all came out to play during the holiday deals and make your life even more miserable than it already felt. You’d been mentally preparing yourself for these days since July, maybe earlier...you didn’t know to be honest. Time now seemed like a foreign concept. Halloween meant dealing with parents fighting over the tiniest accessories for costumes to screeching for a manager because of a nonexistent discount. And the teenagers who acted too cool for everyone had you screaming into whatever you had in your hands. And November brought angry people who basically cursed you and your future generations for not having a bigger display of Thanksgiving items (despite few people celebrating the actual holiday.)

But those didn’t compare to the month-long Christmas. Christmas, ironically enough, was the holiday from hell. Most of the time, you clocked in early in the morning as the sun rose and there was a good chance you wouldn’t come out until the stars were out. If your manager didn’t have you mopping the floor from a coffee that a careless mom spilled, you worked the register, praying that you had the strength to get through your shift. You envied everyone who walked in or passed through those doors because they didn’t feel dread coursing through their bodies. All in all, if you could quit your job without worrying about your next paycheck, you would’ve walked a long time ago, because sometimes it didn’t feel like they paid you enough to deal with that bullshit. 

Tonight seemed like no exception when you trudged through your apartment door, your feet feeling like they’d give out at any second a little after midnight. You let yourself fall on your couch, ripping off the ridiculous Santa Claus hat your coworkers begged you to wear with them, wondering if you could “lose” it somehow. Your face hurt from the mostly fake smile you wore the entire time. You wanted a hot shower to relax your muscles; you wanted to sleep in to the new year so the stress would go away. You needed to look for your laptop so you could start your Christmas shopping so you could spare the other retail workers. (While customers left you apathetic, the empathy you felt for everyone else who dealt with them skyrocketed and you vowed to make things easier for them.);  you needed food so your tummy would quit whining at you to eat something; you needed to remind yourself that no other job paid above the minimum; you needed the fucking cold to go away so you could be less cranky. You just hated everything right now.

As if your night couldn’t get any worse, a scream sounded next door to you. It wasn’t an, “Oh my god, I’m dying here, someone please save me,” yell but one of, “Oh my god; what is this?!” How that was possible, you didn’t know but it was enough for you to leave your couch and out the door in record time to give them a piece of your mind. Some people were asleep at this hour and some like you wanted to wallow in their self-pity because they had to repeat today tomorrow again. 

You had a few choice words for the white flakes falling from the sky because now you had to officially accept that Christmas was coming and you were gonna die of premature stress. But then you saw the culprit who startled you and ruined your night and yelled out an irritated, “Hey!” with hopes of rolling whatever you could spew at him.

He looked at you, his emotions one of wonder and surprise at being acknowledged, his hand midair as if reciting a Shakespearan monologue.

His eyes were a lot sparklier than the ornaments that decorated the Christmas tree at work and you weren’t expecting that, so your expansive vocabulary of bad words died on your tongue, and the longer you looked at him, the harder it was to form a sentence of, “Why the fuck are you so loud?” or something along those lines...and goddamn it, now you were blushing because you had no idea what to do now. His black hair fell into his eyes as the wind blew and he made zero effort to move it, making him seem more attractive and if you weren’t frozen on the spot, you would’ve gone back in and let the roof cave in over your head.

“Hello,” he finally spoke and you were officially fucked. “Can I help you with something?” That. Lisp. With lips redder than Snow White’s had you melting into a puddle and ready to scream at whoever decided to make your life this hard.

“Yeah,” you hated yourself for how meek you sounded when you meant to sound intimidating. “Why’d you yell? Some of us have to be up early tomorrow.” Or in a few hours...time lost its meaning. All you knew was that your alarm had been set up already.

“I’m sorry. I-I just I’ve never seen snow before tonight. See, I’m from LA and it never snows there. Like, we’d go somewhere like Lancaster or more up north, but this is the first time I’ve seen it fall while I’ve been here.”

“Yeah, but so loud? Was that necessary?” Fuck, he was really cute with his reindeer antlers and you really needed to focus because now was not the time to look like a fool in front of a cute boy. Well, any more than you already have.

“I’m sorry.”

“Yeah well just don’t let it happen again.” You finally found the strength to move and you went back inside to let your neighbor have fun with the falling snow, trying to ignore your racing heart and blushing cheeks.

“Oh, shit this is cold!” 

“Dude!” you threw your head out.

“I’m Joshua,” he waved at you.

“And I wanna sleep.” You sighed. “Listen, I know you mean well, but I have to deal with unpleasant humans tomorrow and the day after that and this whole fucking month until the new year so if you shut up for the rest of the night, then I would appreciate it.” 

He shot you a finger gun and clicked his tongue. “Ahh, you work retail. I could tell by your attitude.” He shivered from the cold. “I’m sorry if I disturbed you; I was just excited to see it-”

And now you felt like a jerk. “No, I’m sorry it was just a really long day and people were annoying and some five-year-old kid almost made me cry and December is just a nightmare and it’s only the beginning. I didn’t mean to snap at you, and enjoy the snow.” You closed the door slowly and opened it again just as quickly. “Also, wear gloves because frostbite is not a joke. Okay, sorry for disturbing you.” *

The next morning, after digging in your closet to find all the accessories to keep you warm, you were running late. So much so, you didn’t even bother turning on your alarm. (It was insured so you weren’t too worried about something happening. And in your haste, you ran straight into...Joshua. Great. 

“I’m sorry. I’ll pay for any damages tonight. My boss’s gonna kill me if I don’t get there soon.”

“Do you ever just take a second to breathe?” He asked you, gently blowing on his coffee cup. The smell of it mixed with French vanilla wafted through the air and into your nostrils. “It’s not even eight yet. What’s the rush?”

“Traffic, and long lines to get breakfast.”

“Well, I have a bagel. Here.” 

“I don’t know you.”

“Well, it’s either take my word for it or you’ll be hungry for hours.”

“How’d you like the snow?” Better to change the subject even if meant getting there a little later than usual. You looked at his bagel a little longer and hesitantly reached for it. (And you realized you didn’t have dinner last night, making it look twice as good.)

“It’s really pretty. I’m kinda glad I live here now.”

“It won’t be like that after a while, trust me. And I really have to go. Uh, thanks for the bagel. I’ll pay you for that.”

“Just don’t yell at your neighbors anymore for seeing snow and we’ll call it even. Good luck at work. I think you might need it. Also, I didn’t get your name.” The cold air left his face red and you hated yourself for how attractive he looked.

“I’m Y/N.”

“Well, Y/N, I’ll probably see you after work. Have a great day.”

You couldn’t tell if he was being sincere or sarcastic but you knew that he was cute and you may have believed in Santa Claus for bringing a cute boy to be your next-door neighbor.

[aliferous-ly]

The Setting Sun

yall. Yall. i wrote a fic im so proud of myself. This is Possibly a series, if y’all want it !! otherwise standalone /peace sign/ also, if you like a certain pairing then mention it bcos idk which pairing yet, if any, so :3c

Summary: “He... Logan wasn’t angry, at the events. He just came to a realization, like dust, sitting heavy in his lungs. If he coughed his entire life would go black and gray, and he wouldn’t be able to stop.”

AKA Logan realizes he’s not the best person to be Thomas’s Logic. So he makes a new one. 

Words: 3196

Genre: angst, some fluff. Logangst, of course

Warnings: implied character death for a moment (I promise, he does not die). deprecation, not showing all the sides in the most flattering light (like humans), disappearance.. if there’s anything else, please let me know!

writing tag: @sassy-in-glasses​, @rose-gold-roman​, @justanotherpurplebutterfly​, @echomist13​

Logan came to the realization like Roman might describe love: slowly, and then all at once.

He was increasingly perceptive of the other sides’ actions, though he wasn’t sure if this was a side effect of being Logic or if it were more... paying astute attention to their every move.

But he started noticing the little things, like when Virgil mentioned how certain long silences made him nervous and attentive to every single move.

And the word games of sarcasm that sometimes, used to, fly over his head.

But he’d gotten better.

And he’d gotten so much worse for it.

He noticed Roman’s roll of the eyes when Logan turned away, or sometimes in full view, turning to look at Thomas, get a load of this guy. He noticed the disdainful flick of his fingers, the push of his shoulders, the sneer on his lips that might disappear in moments time.

Of course he saw Patton’s strained smile, his frown at Logan’s exposition, just hold back a bit next time, bud, we don’t want any wounded feelings around here! The concerned jolt of his gaze, flipping between Virgil and Roman and Logan, uncertainty, forced delight, the simmer of it’ll all be okay, let’s just take a step back and talk about it! even though Logan knew “it” would always be feelings and not the actual issue at hand.

And Virgil’s candid nature hid such secrecy that Logan couldn’t miss the darkened expression, the gentle lean away, how Virgil would talk about how Logan disrespected him, or used to, and in the next heartbeat force Logan to shift for his means. The listen, dude, you might want to lay off a bit. Of course, Logan could do that, of course.

He couldn’t miss, then, Thomas wincing, the muscles in his face contracting into something (something) and he’d make eye contact with Roman or Virgil and they’d have that look. He couldn’t miss Thomas’s awkward stance, the way he’d shift when Logan stepped up to speak, the defense alighting in everyone’s eyes the moment Logan opened his mouth.

He... Logan wasn’t angry, at the events. He just came to a realization, like dust, sitting heavy in his lungs. If he coughed his entire life would go black and gray, and he wouldn’t be able to stop.

He couldn’t cough. He couldn’t mess up.

Logan massaged the center of his chest, staring into a shard of broken glass glittering rainbow in the light of the mindscape. Every side had one; they’re own personal escape into Thomas’s core, the centerpiece of his existence.

Too long spent in there, and they would dissolve into Thomas. And I wouldn’t want to lose you, Patton told Virgil. Please don’t go back.

Logan wouldn’t leave without a second thought. He couldn’t do that to them; Logic was a particularly important piece to discussion, and Logan knew that he... that Logic would be needed, for the pieces to fit together. For the code to run properly.

Viscous despair surged through his veins, slogging and clogging his throat and heart, and Logan knew he was no longer needed. Not as Logan. As a facet of Thomas’s personality, he’d failed, and grown too far from the center.

Logan exhaled, closing his eyes and ignoring the trails down his cheeks. Touching the cold surface, he slowly drew his fingers away, trails of electric blue and steel grey extracting from the glass. Logan pulled the essence of Logic from Thomas’s core, the very thought that had been used to make him – only, different, because Logan... Logan could not be a repeat, he could not be another stumble in the process of Thomas’s life.

He gathered synopsis, collected and connecting every (important) aspect of Logic into one humanoid figure. They were comprised of long strings like nerves, dark blue and gleaming.

One more thing. Logan took a moment, or two, to think. He couldn’t mess this part up; done incorrectly, Logan would cause the very problem he was seeking to repair.

One breath, two, and Logan tapped his index finger against his heart, wincing as he drew out a long strand of glowing silver, waving ribbon-like through the air. The world dulled a little at the edges, his connection to Thomas waning and dissolving like morning dew. He suddenly couldn’t remember what year Thomas graduated, or how long he’d studied to be an engineer.

(He remembered twenty Disney facts that Virgil and Roman had tag teamed in teaching him, he remembered Patton’s favorite tea and how much sugar he liked in his coffee, he remembered–)

Logan wove the silver through the blue, interlocking the two until he’d created a fully new being, complete with all of Logan’s capabilities and (Logan slid his fingers away from the silver) his connection to Thomas.

“You’re going to fix everything I’ve destroyed,” Logan said softly. He leaned forward, suddenly tired, rubbing at his temples. “I’m sorry for pinning you with the responsibility. But with luck, you’ll be just the right Logic for them.”

Logan cradled the blue strands shaped like a jaw, and pressed a single kiss to their forehead. “You’ll succeed where I’ve failed,” he said, as life and autonomy filled the shape of a human Logan had created. Skin stitched over blue wiring, eyes glowing the silver of Logan’s connection as they blinked open.

“You are Logic,” Logan said, exhausted and fading fast. “You know your purpose. There are others like you, but they do not know you yet.”

The new Logic stared at him, unblinking. They opened their mouth and said, “What are you?”

Logan smiled, brown eyes crinkling at the edges. “I’m nothing.”

“But you are here,” they said. “You cannot be nothing. Nothing does not exist.”

“Truly, I am,” Logan said. He reached out a hand, the skin and veins and bones disappearing, fading like a mirage. “You see? I am vanishing.”

They blinked once, then. “You are Logic.”

“No,” Logan said. He shook his head. “I was.”

His body finally got the cue, and Logan faded just like Roman had once explained love:

Slowly, and then all at once.

I was.

I am no longer.

—

Roman heard a whisper through the mindscape and looked up from his book, narrowing his eyes.

“Roman?” Patton asked, doing a jigsaw puzzle with Virgil. “What’s up?”

“I heard something,” Roman said.

Virgil snorted. “Like, a ghost? Are we haunted? Can we be haunted?” he sounded excited about the concept.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” Roman said. They made faces at each other, a common “you’re irritating” that they exchanged.

“Maybe I’m the ghost, and you’re just now noticing my ghostly attributes,” Virgil said, wiggling his fingers.

“If any of us were a ghost, it’d be Logan,” Roman said, laughing. “From how often he holes himself up in his room nowadays.” He winced, then, because yikes, he forgot to watch his mouth again. He waited for Patton’s chiding be nice to Logan, Roman, that he’d always gotten with Virgil, and frowned when it didn’t come.

Virgil snorted before refocusing on the puzzle, evidently done with the conversation. Patton made a small noise of victory, slotting a piece into place. Virgil’s face softened with a smile.

Roman turned back around, leaning against the couch, brows furrowed. Something was wrong with the mindscape, something off. But if Virgil wasn’t noting anything, then it had to be solely in Roman’s realm.

Because... well, Roman couldn’t explain it, really, just a couple feelings thrown together with erratic stitching into a mismatched blanket that barely worked. But if he had to hazard a guess, something had been created, and shifted, and something – he longed to know what – added, to him, to his job.

The last part made him a little indignant because honestly, wasn’t his job hard enough? Which side decided well, this is a little much for me, Roman can take it!

Probably... well, probably Logan, but it didn’t seem logical for Logan to dump something else on Roman, not when Logan knew how stressed Roman could get, not when Logan was uncomfortably familiar with Roman’s breakdowns.

“Hey Virgil,” Roman said, throwing an arm on the back of the couch and turning to look at the table.

Virgil sighed. “What, couldn’t stand silence for more than five minutes?”

“It was three minutes and forty five seconds and I cannot, in fact, stand upon silence so no, I cannot,” Roman said, the words tumbling from his mouth before he could think. “Nerd,” he tacked on at the end, lamely and without heat.

Patton stopped moving, his and Virgil’s gaze stopping on Roman’s face, expressions twisted with confusion.

Virgil laughed uncomfortably, shifting in his chair. “You might be spending a little too much time with Logan, man.”

“I think it’s a good thing!” Patton said. “Logan can be a tough nut to crack.”

Roman frowned, because he wasn’t really, although he... he hadn’t really tried, as of late, to focus on him.

“I’m... I’m gonna go to imagination,” Roman said.

“Alright, kiddo!” Patton said. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just...” Roman searched for an excuse, half-standing, when an idea struck him. He trained his face into a cocky, pompous expression, drawing on Thomas’s ability as an actor, falling into his role easily. “I’m bored. Reading this novel has not been as stimulating as promised, and I need to fight something.”

Virgil rolled his eyes and Roman internally grinned. Ace in the hole. Patton laughed and said, “Go ahead, bud! We’re not holding you back!”

Roman stood fully, stretching and setting the book on the side table, careful not to bend any of the pages. His books were littered with dogears and highlights, but Logan’s were meticulously cared for, only the best of the best with perfect folds (favorite parts) and notes.

Roman sank out to the hallway they collectively called home, each of their rooms branching out. Patton’s, of course, was adorned with various positive imagery with the overarching pale blue theme. Virgil’s was pitch black, delicate engravings of purple, covered in Logan’s notes and Patton’s pictures and Roman’s odd stickynote varying from return my earbuds you heathen to a realistic drawing of a chicken.

He stood in front of Logan’s door, eyeing the straight white and blue lines. They really needed to paint over this, it didn’t encompass Logan at all. Roman had a few ideas... maybe he would tell Logan, while he was here.

Roman knocked. “Logan?” he called out, puffing his chest to make his voice sound bigger. “It’s time to emerge from hibernation!”

Nothing.

Roman blinked a few times. Was Logan not in his room? But then, where else would he be? “Logan? Look, I’m sorry I was going back and forth with you on the blue and pink colors, it was so much like the sleeping beauty dress that I couldn’t resist.”

A few more seconds, and Roman frowned. “Are you not in there? Hello?” He knocked a few more times, just to be sure. Maybe he had earbuds in, or something.

The door swung open, Roman’s fist poised, and everything tilted on its axis for three horrible seconds.

“Who...” Roman choked on his words, confusion-fear-bewilderment filling his veins. “Who are you?”

They didn’t move, eyes open and unblinking, a striking silver color. “I am not a who. I am a what. I am Logic.”

Something small and dark twinged in Roman’s chest and he shook his head. “No. No, you’re not. Where’s Logan?”

“At the present moment, I am uncertain.” A channel of silver lit up their cheekbones, like wires in a circuit board. “Logan did not tell me where he was going, only that he was.”

“Logan is Logic, you’re... you’re not Logic,” Roman said again, shivering. This was wrong, this was wrong. “Why are you here?”

“I am the manifestation of Thomas Foley Sanders’s Logic, intended to add reasoning to certain discussions.”

“No, Logan is,” Roman tried. They didn’t blink, which was really starting to unnerve him on a whole different level. “I don’t understand.”

They regarded him for a moment. “Very well. I will expound. Logan created me ten minutes and thirteen point three seconds ago. He used the mindscape to do so.”

Roman flinched. Logan created something. Logan created... he swallowed, throat thick.

They – Logic? – continued. “The former Logic said, ”You are Logic. You know your purpose. There are others like you, but they do not know you yet.“ When I inquired of his being, he stated, ”I am nothing.“ This is paradoxical situation, so I sought to remedy his flawed thinking. He said, ”You see? I am vanishing.“ His fingers disappeared into the air, of a way I am thus uncertain. I called him this ”Logic“, as you did, but he corrected my flawed verbiage and stated, ”No. I was.“ Soon after his statement, the rest of his body vanished. I have been standing in the room, collecting data for my success here. Evidently, the former Logic knew his job was being fulfilled incorrectly, and decided to find a solution. I was created as the solution.”

Roman couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. “What?”

“Would you like me to repeat?”

“No, no,” Roman stuttered, out. “No. No, Logan wouldn’t... how did he make you? How?”

“From the data I have obtained,” they said, still not blinking or moving, as if they were a picture on a background, “the former Logic gathered the essence of Logic into a singular being from the data of the mindscape. He inserted that being with a silver strand – of which I am uncertain of the reason – and gave the being life.”

“The silver,” Roman whispered, realization dawning in his eyes. “The silver is the connection to Thomas, you need it to be one of his sides, I’ve never heard of... transferring, or whatever he did...”

Roman fell quiet, the silence deafening to his ears. Logic hadn’t invited him into Logan’s room, though Roman wondered if Logic knew common societal practices, or if he was merely... a computer. A vessel.

A thought struck him and Roman’s spine shot ramrod straight. He stared at Logic intently, just barely stopping himself from grabbing their shoulders and shaking (just to get some movement, some life). “The golden string. What did he do with it?”

A few seconds passed as they processed this. “I am in no possession of a golden strand.”

“But where – where–” Roman stopped, took a breath, and reworded his sentence. “What did he look like before he disappeared? Did he glow, or were his eyes a different color? His veins?”

Roman counted one, two, three, four, five before Logic spoke. “The former Logic had skin much lighter than a healthy human being, being transparent and pale. His veins were not red or blue but a copper, gold color. His eyes were brown, but the irises had lines of gold within them, which steadily took over the entire iris.”

Roman lost his breath and almost fell, holding himself against the wall with one hand. “He’s... he...” Oh my god.

“Is the golden strand important to my functions?” Logic stated more than asked.

“Not... not your functions, but it’s... it’s his entire personality, his memories, his feelings,” Roman said, the words thick and heavy in his mouth.

“Very well,” they said, and asked no further questions, a silence that gave Roman a whiplash he never thought he’d feel. His curiosity, his wit...

And then it struck him.

“Oh, no, Logan,” Roman murmured, eyes wide and unblinking. Logan hadn’t left any untied odds and ends, had he? The “essence” of logic in a different being, and his extra jobs, the ones that required a personality, that required feeling, he pushed... pushed onto Roman. And, undoubtedly, part of Virgil, part of Patton... they all carried a little bit of Logan in them, now.

Roman had Logan’s scathing wit, his quick comebacks.

He didn’t want them.

“The gold,” Roman said. “When he vanished, did he have a mirror on him? A shard of glass?”

“I am uncertain.”

“And you don’t have any desire to learn? To figure it out? Wrack your brain?”

“I do not have desire,” they said so plainly that Roman wanted to cry.

“Okay, I need to... I need,” Roman gestured a bit with his hand, thoughts running a mile a minute. “Mirror mirror on the wall...” his mirror appeared in his hand moments later, gilded with gold and an intricate handle. Roman clutched it like a parched man to water. “Show me Logan.”

The mirror swirled, disney-esque to his name, before revealing a vague fog with a shimmer of gold. One moment there, gone the next, leaving just... gray.

But it was there.

Roman was certain of it.

“He’s still alive,” Roman murmured. The mirror, if it had not been made of impenetrable thought, would have cracked under the pressure of his hands. “He’s still alive.”

“The former Logic did not erase himself?” the other Logic asked.

“No, he’s still there, just his personality and thoughts and memories,” Roman said. “He didn’t erase himself. He moved himself into the mindscape. He did the sides version of moving far, far away.”

“He should have. He cannot take up space in the mindscape,” Logic said.

“His personality isn’t much space at all,” Roman said. “The mindscape is neigh endless. You know this.”

“You make a valid point. I concede,” Logic said. Roman frowned. Agreement so fast?

“But that means he’s still there,” Roman said. “He’s alive. And that means we can find him.”

“Are you certain he wishes to be found?” Logic said.

“No,” Roman said. “But I... I can’t let him just leave. I can’t. The longer he spends in the mindscape, the more he disappears... almost like growing old. I need to... He shouldn’t have left. He’s logic, he’s our logic, and I... I miss him.”

“Very well.” No fighting whatsoever.

Roman took a shuddering breath. An actual mission, with real dangers. An adventure, the romantic side of his brain whispered. Save the damsel in distress. Only, Logan had chosen to disappear into the mindscape.

But Roman couldn’t do nothing. He’d... he’d have to, at least, find him, and talk to him. It wasn’t right for Logan to up and leave without telling the others.

Then it’s decided, then?

“Okay,” Roman said. “Okay. I’m certain.” He squared his shoulders, breathing slowly. “I’m going to get him.”

Logic said nothing, stare blank and emotionless.

Goosebumps rose on Roman’s skin. “But first...” he flicked the mirror, vanishing it into the mindscape. “First, I have to tell the others.”

Logic didn’t move as Roman sunk out. Roman wondered if he’d still be standing there, hours later.

He didn’t know why Logan had left. Why Logan had committed an act so much more thorough, so much more permanent, than Virgil ducking out.

I don’t know why you left.

Roman rose in the living room, drawing Virgil and Patton’s curious gazes.

But I know one thing.

Virgil shot to his feet, entire being buzzing with energy and fear-anxiety-nervousness.

You’re not alone. You’re never alone.

Patton stood slowly, a shaky sort of realization filling his face before Roman had even said a word.

Your family is behind you.

And we’re not leaving you behind.

[babybirdgyeom]

got7 as friends with benefits

– basically friends with benefits becoming real lovers – this is longer than i intented it to be oops – just a lil something to overcome my writers block

𝑀𝒶𝓇𝓀 𝒯𝓊𝒶𝓃 

– literally more friends than benefits – y’all always lowkey had a thing for each other – took you two years to finally make out though – but from then on y’all never stopped again – mark was like ‘oh only until we find smth serious’ – but you just both stopped looking for smth serious at all – oops – you saw absolutely no downside to this – good sex with someone you’re totally attracted to and can talk to about everyhing? amazing – so now it’s been like 12 months since this thing started – all different kinds of sex – sometimes it would be giggly as fuck, laughter and fun included – sometimes y’all would have sex while casually talking about everything – sometimes you just had sex to cheer the other one up on a bad day – basically always looking for any reason to have sex – you both are very confused how good this works out? – you’re pretty much like a couple but both of you are lowkey too dense to admit it – all of got7 knew about y’all, you didn’t even try to make a secret out of it – other fwbs only meet to fuck but not you and mark – he constantly comes over and stays forever, would never just leave after sex – right beside you when you wake up with no intention to leave until he absolutely has to – “mark??? do you think we act too much like a couple??” – he thought about your question for a second before lying down beside you – “naaaahhh” he said laughing before giving you a kiss “we fine” – you had no idea how y’all should continue because you definitely weren’t breaking this up – but you also knew this couldn’t go on like this forever even though you’d love that – so one morning you decided to adress this situation – he was so cute besides you with his morning hair you saw an angel – when you started to talk about “how to continue” he immediately started to panic – “do you want to end this?????” – you chuckled a bit – so he also didn’t want it to end – you assured him that ending this thing between you was the last thing you wanted – but also told him that you might start to look around again and meet other ppl – not bc u grew tired of him but bc u had to look out for the future – y’all were getting old and shit – mark didn’t like this thought at all – lowkey too shy to admit that though – “but we’re having fun, why should we stop” – softest baby you could swear he was pouting – for the first time ever he stopped and was like – hmmmm why aren’t we dating in the first place – never before thought about the idea of actually dating you – because what difference would it make y’all act like a couple – but suddenly he realized that it definitely would make a difference – 100% has no idea how to deal with this sudden change of things – after some time he tries to confess – highkey fails tho – “you know i love to have sex with you” – “i think we should have more than sex” – “what i’m trying to say is------------uuuuuuhm....” – stops and just starts kissing you – but more passionately and full of love – he smiled into the kiss which made ur heart beat 10x faster – you decided to help him out a bit – “i like you too mark”

𝐼𝓂 𝒥𝒶𝑒𝒷𝓊𝓂

– when the thing between the two of you started jaebum was sooo sure he’d be fine with it – you’ve been close to him since high school, always in the same group of people – somehow though you always were friends but nothing more – maybe bc y’all were too busy with other people mostly – but you definitely became good friends in the last few years – when he was suggesting this whole idea to you you were like – jb why u tryna ruin our friendship like that – but he assured you that sex couldn’t ruin your friendship – it would just be the cherry on top – now he’s not too sure about it anymore – he loves the sex for sure and wouldn’t want to miss it for anything – but this boy started to get a bit frustrated and insecure about the blurred lines between you and him – highkey has a crush on you and hates it – tries to hide it as good as possible – you were 100% sure jaebum was the best lover you could have – but also... damn he’s cute? and lovely? and so funny? – when he smiles your heart goes whoosh – but you always tried to ignore those thoughts – because how cliche would it be to fall in love with your fwb – you told yourself on a daily that it’s just his dick game that makes you think stuff like this – y’all said that you wouldn’t just sleep with other ppl unless you met someone you actually could see a future with it – “if we horny we can just call each other” – one time you were drunk on a night out with got7 – and jaebum may have slipped a lil drunk i love you – and you knew he was drunk and didn’t mean it – so you both laughed it off but since that moment everything changed – feelings were involved and you both knew you had to face them sooner or later – but tbh he tried to do it as late as possible – so ofc jaebum was going home with you in secret like always – and your usually rough sex was different all of a sudden – jaebum could be sensual???? that was new to you – he apologized for being so soft afterwards hshshs – both of you were laughing and talking the whole night – you were almost certain that jaebum also thought this could be more than being friends – until he ghosted you for a week after this night – and you wanted to kill him, fucking idiot – but ofc as soon as he wrote you again you were like – yea no prob dude :) – bc sadly you had no reason to be mad at him – bc he wasn’t your boyfriend – and slowly you started to hate that he wasn’t – definitely made up for ghosting you for a week – “let me take you out to dinner i’m sorry” – tells you he had a few rough days – in reality he didn’t write you bc he thought it’s the easiest way to get over it – jokes on him he’s a fool in love and he realized it by now – has the hardest time with it – bc im jaebum???? in love??? that wasn’t normal – but you made him soft – also best ‘i’m sorry i missed you too’ sex ever – gets frustrated afterwards – bc he loves not only your boobs but also ur lil soft heart – goes down on you while confessing hshssh

𝒫𝒶𝓇𝓀 𝒥𝒾𝓃𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓃𝑔

– no one knew that you two were kind of a thing – jinyoung never really labeled it as “friends with benefits” to you – one thing just lead to another one day and suddenly you all were making out in his bed – which was fine to you, no complaints – but in the beginning you were completely confused, not knowing where y’all stand – was this a one time thing? – were you becoming fuck buddies?   – he actually likes you a lot you were a hundred percent sure – but damn you knew him long enough to know how complicated jinyoung is when it comes to feelings – constantly has to talk to you about this whole situation – “(y/n) i’m bad for you we shouldn’t do this anymore” – “i don’t want you to miss the opportunity to meet someone you could like (y/n)” –  you just rolled your eyes whenever he started this nonsense –  not because you were annoyed –  you just wish he wouldn’t think that much and just let things happen – “we’re fine”, you always tell him – it was cute that he wanted the best for you but... you wanted park jinyoung – you knew this since a long time – you also knew one day he’d man up and ask you out properly – he just needs his time and you were willing to give it to him – and secretly jinyoung was very aware of this too – he wouldn’t just start screwing someone who’s as close to him as you – he cherished you and was more than thankful that you two didn’t need words to communicate – both of you hated to be so careful whenever you went out with the boys – “we should just tell them” your drunk self thought this was a good idea – as you were in a small room, pinned against a wall, jy’s lips all over your chest – “and then what?”, he asked placing another kiss on top of your breasts before continuing, “yugyeom and bambam would never shut up.” –  you knew he was right – but it would make things so much easier – “jinyoung” you said softly finally making him look up from your breasts – “you know you love me”, your drunk self said teasing him – he laughed before giving you a soft and sensual kiss – still chuckling he went down your neck again – “i’m sorry, i’m busy here”, he said avoiding the topic – but his laughter was enough for you – it just made you sure one more time that you were right about him – if he wouldn’t like you he would’ve said it – so you had to be patient with jinyoung – which was fine considering the fact that you’d still get to sleep with him all the time – he never left in the morning before you were awake – that would be disrepectful towards you in his opinion – it kind of was his way to show you he cares – because you knew he’d usually always sneak out immediately after one night stands – if he couldn’t sleep in with you he’d wake you up shortly to say goodbye – there was always a goodbye kiss involved even though he hated how cheesy that is – he couldn’t help it with you – he was constantly afraid that someone else might snatch you away from him – it didn’t matter that he knew you liked him too – it sometimes killed him that he couldn’t just man up and finally ask you out properly – he loved this friends with benefit thing you two had going on – sex whenever someone of you felt like it – but no room for fights or stuff like that bc you weren’t dating – months after this little thing between the two of you started he decided that it was finally time – you put up with his bullshit for long enough he thought – even though he still was afraid of commitment he wanted to try for you – also he knew that this one colleague of yours was trying to take you out – he couldn’t let that happen – another thing was that he was afraid you’d lose your patience – so finally after all he took the next step one night after sex – he was still inside you, his breath still heavy as both of you tried to calm down – his lips were finding your neck as his arm was around your waist – “i think i’m ready”, he whispered in your ear – “anal?”, you joked, making him laugh out loud – “i actually thought about making you my girlfriend.” he said, still chuckling a bit – “jinyoung”, you said surprised, not thinking it would happen anytime soon – he gave you a kiss, smiling into it – “i love you (y/n)”

𝒥𝒶𝒸𝓀𝓈𝑜𝓃 𝒲𝒶𝓃𝑔

– jackson wang was making you go completely crazy – you swear you were going insane soon – it started out simple – you and jackson met up every now and then to frickle frackle – you remember thinking you won the lottery – like look at jackson he’s a whole meal – eternal beauty mixed with a body that knew how to move – and wow, he knew what he’s doing – but that was the problem: jackson was literally perfect – you both said that you were friends with benefits and nothing more – well apparently to jackson wang that meant coming to you with your favorite chocolates – sometimes he’d pick you up and you’d drive around the whole night talking and listening to music – he’d never leave without saying goodbye – always texts you after sex even if it’s just smth small – “last night was amazing” – “hope you have a good day, don’t let your boss annoy you” – “write me if you need anything” – that perfect motherfucker straight up made you fall for him – sounds perfect doesn’t it? – but jackson just wouldn’t ask you out properly – it was all fun in the beginning – like damn y’all even had the same kinks – “this is all i need” jackson once said before falling asleep beside you – those mixed signals left you wanting more and more – within weeks you knew you were in love with jackson – what you didn’‘t know is that he felt the exact same way – at first he thought the amazing sex was just messing with his mind – but the way you looked at him and him only made him realize that this was maybe more than friends who had sex every now and then – he told mark about the whole thing and mark immediately was like – a giggly child which made jackson feel all giggly too – and as they were sitting on the sofa all happy you walked into the room – mark immediately stood up and out of nowhere hugged you – “you’re so cute (y/n)” – “wtf mark” – before you could ask anything he was already gone – “what was that about?” you asked jackson while sitting down next to him – suddenly he did something he never did before – his hand was in your hair and he gave you a soft and slow kiss – of course he did that before but not with the other guys in the same house – “jackson what if the others come in?”, you asked in shock wondering what was going on – he shrugged and looked you in the eyes, a satisfied smile on his lip – “they going to find out sooner or later” – “find out about what exactly”, you asked him confused – was he planning to tell the guys about your fuck dates – not that you’d care but it didn’t seem like smth he’d do – he usually never talked about his feelings – he was someone who showed how he felt instead of talking about it – “about my feelings for you” – you choked on literal air – suddenly you were talking feelings – so you weren’t delusional the whole time – he actually liked you – good for you tbh since dating jackson literally is like hitting the jackpot

𝒞𝒽𝑜𝒾 𝒴𝑜𝓊𝓃𝑔𝒿𝒶𝑒

– tbh being fwb with youngjae the most unexpected thing ever – you two been friends since ages – he knows your whole family and you know his – both of you were like it’s probs not a good idea – but you did it anyway – you never were interested in him back then – until one day you looked at him and realized   – wow youngjae rlly isn’t a boy anymore – he is a man now – suddenly you caught yourself staring at him at every party – blushing whenever he looked at you for a bit too long – he used to be so shy and cute – well at least that’s what u thought until he was kissing you roughly, pinning you against the wall outside of your friend’s home – but youngjae had many different sides to him – sides you never knew about before getting involved with him sexually – a cutie that always takes care of you and your needs – just wants you to enjoy and relax during sex – but 10/10 still knows how to get what he wants from you – sometimes he wonders how tf he managed to become your fwb – not bc he doubted himself just bc – he lowkey always had a thing for you – he also knew it probably was a stupid idea to go into a friendship with benefits with feelings from the start – didn’t care though at least he could finally have you – you both agreed that you were in it for the fun – no jealousy, no drama, just good sex in addition to your friendship – he was in heaven bc he loved how easy going it was – definitely wasn’t making a big secret out of his feelings tho – your lil deal never said smth about no feelings involved – the cheekiest of them all – sends you a good morning text every single day – always surprises you – you know no one would believe you but king of sexting – one time he wrote you that he needs one of those long hugs that turns into sex – and u were like HUH? choi youngjae? – basically this turned into your first of many sexting sessions – at the beginning you were 100% sure you wouldn’t develop feelings – uhh well by now you definitely had to admit you fooled yourself – one time while having very good sex you may or may not have called him babe – which maybe didn’t sound like a big thing but you usually never used nicknames – so midsex he just stopped being confused hshsh – he smirked a bit though, not able to hide   – “i like that”, he said giving you a small kiss – so suddenly you and youngjae were calling each other honey and babe – not much later you were resting your head on his shoulder in front of the boys – secret handholding at movie nights, sneakily under the blanket – until someday you just started casually talking about future plans together – the lines were getting more and more blurry – “are we friends?”, you asked him one night before falling asleep – your head resting on his naked chest, his hand playing with your hair – “yes, forever and ever” – his voice was soft like honey, he didn’t even had to think of an answer – “but are we just that? just friends?” – he let out a sigh, his thumb slowly stroking your cheek – “i don’t think you can be ‘just friends’ with someone you’re in love with”

𝐵𝒶𝓂𝒷𝒶𝓂

– you and bambam were messy as fuck it was almost amusing – everyone knew about the two of you – you even joked about it in front of others – “yoooo (y/n) rdy to suck this dicc tonite?” – starts laughing and apologizing right after – when it all started you remember telling bambam ‘just this once’ – until you found him in your bed again the next day – oh and the day after that – and by now you and bambam were constantly over each other – things were going really chill most of the time – y’all had fun, spent loads of time together – sometimes naked, sometimes dressed – y’all acted like it was no big deal and you were just friends – but every now and then you find yourself staring at him – wondering if he always was this beautiful – sometimes he laughed and you had to force yourself to think about something else – the members all kind of just saw you as a couple which was also pretty dangerous – one time you were texting with a guy from home – and jackson saw and was like – “bambam!!!!! who’s he why is (y/n) writing with him” – and bambam was like trying to ignore but you could swear he disliked it – but you never knew what he really thought – like whenever y’all were drunk he’d just be like the biggest flirt – you remember one time when you were at a party and making out outside – and he kissed down your neck and just telling you he loves you – ‘you’re drunk, we’re friends’ – at least that’s what you tried to tell yourself – ‘oh are we? i don’t kiss yugyeom like that you know’ – but then y’all never talked about it again – texts you at the most random times – sometimes all horny like – ‘i am in front of your house and coming upstairs get undressed’ – other times just in the middle of the night like – ‘did you know that cats sleep 16hrs a day?? i’m jealous’ – ohh talking about jealousy – bambam’s biggest flaw – he hated how jealous he was like he knew it was a problem – especially considering the fact that...y’all are not a couple – you talked to him several times about it – mostly bc u liked to tease him – and he was so shy and cute about it you never saw him like that – “listen i know!!! it’s stupid” – basically he’s just so jealous because you are not his – and if you meet someone else he’ll lose this fwb relationship – hates to admit it but he actually likes the thing you two have going on – “it’s chill” – you hit him “chill? what a nice way to describe having sex with me” – he laughed and tried to change the topic – but you wouldn’t let him – “bambam, do you like me?” – he just rolls his eyes – “ofc i do why would i sleep with you” – “but do you like like me?”, you asked teasing, looking at him with big eyes – “i changed my mind i fucking hate you” – breaking news: he didn’t hate you – he liked you so much it was k i l l i n g him – one time he dreamed of you – nonsexual – it was just you and him looking at the stars and you confessed – ever since then it was all he could think of when he saw you – but ofc he always played it cool in front of you – remember that one time he told you he loved you when he was drunk – truth is he barely drank that night – he knew exactly what he was saying but he knew how drunk you were – secretely hoped you don’t remember – until one time you and him were watching a movie where a dude confessed to a girl all drunk – and you were like remember WHEN YOU DID THIS – and he was like “uuuhm nnnnO?” – so you told him every detail of that night bc u truly thought he forgot – as you were halfway through he stopped you – “(y/n) i know exactly what happened” – leaving u confused af – “why did you lie???” – “bc u didn’t say it back” you could swear he was pouting – suddenly you froze... did he mean it? like actually mean it? – you never even considered that he was serious – long story short that’s how your fuck buddy became your boyfriend

𝒦𝒾𝓂 𝒴𝓊𝑔𝓎𝑒𝑜𝓂

– both of you have absolutely no idea how this could have happened – you never planned to even have sex in the first place – but the way he danced got you and the way you smiled got him – you decided to get rid off the sexual tension before it became unbearable – jokes on you bc it just made you want to have more – so you two found yourselves in the same situation over and over again – enjoying a night together and having endless fun – once the two of you started you wouldn’t stop – like there were times when you were just up all night having sex – with cute breaks in between where your head was resting on his bare chest – his hand tangled in your hair – it always feels so right even though it seemed so wrong – you and yugyeom definitely were trapped in this situation – of course the easy solution would’ve been to just date each other – but neither one of you dared to say it out loud – you hated when he left the next morning – yugyeom also hated that he had to leave – both of you were always afraid that this could be the last time before everything ends – dramatic headasses tbh – but once his lips touched yours you couldn’t get enough – no one knew about your secret little thing – which turned out to become pretty hard – you always had to sneak away in private – bambam and jackson were constantly on the mission to get you a boyfriend which didn’t make it easier – yugyeom wouldn’t admit it but he hated it when they tried to set you up – not even bc he wanted you just bc they were being so noisy about it – at least that’s what he told himself over and over again – long story short you two were obviously into each other – and the amazing chemistry you had in bed made it even harder to act like you didn’t – two weeks after your first kiss with yugyeom you already feared that it’s gonna be over soon – one time in the middle of the night u just had to wake him up to talk – “yugi i rlly don’t want this to ruin our friendship” – he immediately took your face in his hands, giving you a big smooch on your forehead – “i’d never let anything or anyone ruin us...especially not myself” – you often wondered how one night you could just have sex for 6 hrs – and the next night you wouldn’t even kiss, just both in bed, talking, laughing, making memories – he was always so sweet to you – making you feel more loved than any of the guys you actually dated – waking up next to him in the morning could end in two ways – dick sucking or cuddle sessions – you were both with fine – kingggg of eating you out tbh he could do it for days – and as much as you enjoyed the sex – and also the affection – and just being with him – you slowly gave up on the thought that he’d actually like you or ask you out – it was hurting you a bit if you were honest – so one day you decided for the sake of your friendship and your heart you needed to end this – “no why would we end this?” – the horror on his face was real – “(y/n), don’t you like me anymore?” – it broke your heart – “i think i like you a bit too much” – he took your hand, making your heart flutter – “then why would you end this rather than take the next step?”

[umccall71]

Chapter: 20

Characters: Prince Liam & (MC) Lady Saige

Rating: Mature

Word count :3423

Disclaimer:All characters are property of Pixelberry except my OC Lady Saige. The use of these characters are for entertainment only and I am only borrowing them.

Summary:After a summer of a lifetime,Prince Liam thought he could have it all.He was carefree, free, and sharing time with the woman of his dreams.When life was easy, a balancing act between love and duty, he realizes his truths are lies, wrong is right, and decisions do have consequences. Lady Saige never imagined she would be one of his consequences.When an utter act horror throws her world into a tailspin.

Warning: This series contains subject matter of depression,pregnancy, violence, and sensitive sexual content.The story may trigger certain individuals. Please be advised. If you are reading this series you are acknowledging you are 18+.

@ao719 @eadanga @silviasutton1989 @rainbowsinthestorm @the-soot-sprite @jared2612 @sashatrr @jovialyouthmusic @smalltalk88 @custaroonie @kuladekiwi @whenyourheartskipsabeat @marietrinmimi @furiousherringoperatortoad @gibbles82 @choices97 @fantasy-of-fiction @romanticatheart-posts @drakesensworld @simsvetements @blackcoffee85 @3pawandme @indiacater @hopefulmoonobject @elles-choices @carabeth @carabethpow @janezillow @kingliam2019 @lodberg @ownworldresident

**********

The following morning, Olivia had arrived in the early sunrise at the urgent request of her king. Liam had sent a message that he needed to take care of some things but did not want to leave Saige alone. Olivia came baring decadent pastries and coffee,tea, and juices.

“Good morning your majesties...I come bearing gifts of sustenance,'' she smiled to break the tension.

Liam had been awake for hours simply coordinating the events that would transpire at warped speed if he has his way.He had arranged for Bastien to pick him up early to escort him to meet face to face that evil that had lurked and entered his home. His heart was pounding out of his chest as he contemplated confronting Constantine. “Thank you for coming Olivia, I shan't be long.”

Liam turned and cupped Saige’s face placing a tender kiss upon her lips careful not to linger too long . “Love, I don't want to leave but there is an urgent matter I need to handle. I won't be long...I can't wait to take you home to care for you in the comfort of our bedroom.”

Saige flinched at the mention of the word home.As much happiness as she shared with Liam, she no longer felt the palace was her home. What Liam missed was the reluctance in his wife to proclaim that going home was at the forefront of her mind. Their home served as an internal prison for the dreams that she sought with her husband. The dream that was stolen that night in the dark...stolen from her heart. The palace would serve as an existential graveyard to the baby that they lost. All she could do in that moment was to nod and try to force a false smile as he left her with her closest friend.

Olivia slid beside Saige on the bed and handed her a chocolate croissant and a bottle of juice, “eat...you need to regain your strength to make those sons of bitches pay.” Olivia’s emerald green orbs met the lackluster crystal blue eyes.

Saige stared at the window as if she were seeking answers from the inky hues creeping between the curtain. She softly whispered , “ I wish he could see that he would be better off without me.”

Olivia reached out to grasp hold of Saige’s hand trying to project the comfort and understanding in this devastatingly critical hours following the void that was left in the pit of her friend. “Saige...you have to understand that living without you is not in the cards for Liam ...right? That man loves you and he will love you until the day he dies. I couldn't imagine the weight of sorrow you are drowning from inside. Please understand that what you feel...he feels it too.”

Saige blocked the words that were being shared...she reached over and pushed the call button to alert the nurse.She pushed the pastry away and ignored Liv’s words. Moments later the mature woman entered the room and smiled at the queen.

“Ma’am, is there anything I can do for you?”,she inquired.

Saige spoke looking out of the window, “ How long before I can leave here ?”

The nurse looked bewildered and taken aback momentarily, “ well it should be any day now. THe doctor wanted to make sure you have crossed the threshold with your pregnancy and risk no setbacks or infections as a result. I'm sure it won't be too much longer.” The nurse bowed and exited the room.

Olivia’s gaze followed the nurse out of the room and turned to her friend. “What are you thinking Saige? I know you well enough to know that there is nothing random about your questioning.”

Saige simply slid down in the bed and turned her back to Olivia, silent tears escaping her eyes. She couldn't find the words to explain the magnitude of her pain and confusion. She felt the ache in her heart at the baby she would never rocked to sleep, never see the mirrored smile of the baby’s father, never witness Liam dote over…so many first stolen from them.

***

Liam marched down the hall following Bastien mind locked on the man that tore a hole in his life without a blink of an eye. He was laser focused on looking him in the eyes and studying his reaction to his learning that his son was now in possession of the truth. Liam always felt that a man armed with the truth was armed with a powerful tool. He took long strides down the palace halls draped in gold ornate molding, Italian marble floors, and images of ancestors of Cordonia. He wondered what his ancestors would think of Constantine raping the now queen. He cracked his neck as Bastien stopped in front of a set of locked double doors that locked away his father.He knew this because the two guards would not be afforded to be housed in such luxury.He glanced to Bastien as he let out a deep breath...squared his shoulders and nodded for Bastien to open the door.

“Whatever you do ...don't open this room once im inside until I give you the signal.This is a conversation that needs to be had. I trust you have the paperwork to present to the council with formal charges?”, he watched as his heard guard nodded in acknowledgement.

“Yes sir… everything is in order awaiting word from you to proceed.”, Bastien opened the door and then back out abruptly closing and locking the door behind his king. He stretched his arms over his head before adjusting his steele gray suit and tie.

Liam slowly paced the room making eye contact with Constantine.He looked upon his father as a science experiment he was seeking a worthy hypothesis for in the end. He slowly removed his navy blue blazer and laid it across the boudoir chair. He undid his cufflinks depositing them in his trousers pocket. He rolled up his sleeves still refraining from uttering a word as he watched.Costantine went to inquire appallingly to Liam why he was being held in that room is not allowed to go to his wife in their home.

Liam scoffed at the hypocrisy of him wanting to be there with his wife when he robbed his own wife of peace, happiness, and sense of security. “Which one did you use?he asked as he started moving closer toward his father.Constantine looked at him puzzled. “What?...what are you talking about Liam?” Still no clue where his son’s thoughts were .

“Did you use the left or right hand to choke my wife in the middle of the night? Which one started your path of madness? Don't bother denying that you were there...because I have proof that you were indeed there in my home… Constantine.” Liam exuded a calm, but determined look as he stalked over to the fireplace removing the gold poker.

“Which hand did you use to strike my wife you asshole?!”, his voice deepened as he became irritated being in the room with her assailant.

“Liam… I don't know what that little bitch told you but she's lying. I gave her only what she wanted.”, he smirked as his eyes shifted back and forth watching Liam’s reaction to his lie. “Liam she has wanted to come between us since she first set foot in this palace. You cannot let her damage our relationship anymore than it has been.”

Liam's voice came out in a roar, “ENOUGH!... you will tell me which hand you used to grip the throat of my pregnant wife!”

Constantine slowly lowered his gaze to look to his right..that was all the confirmation Liam needed. He snatched his father from across the room and snapped his right arm.. Lowering a devastating blow to his right hand that landed on the desk. “Fuck Liam … what the hell is wrong with you?!, he bellowed in agony.

“Was that the same hand you used to strike her across her beautiful face you bastard?!”,his breathing became labored as he fought the urge to end him where he stood. “ Liam delivered a crushing blow with his fist across Constantine’s mouth where deep red blood flowed from his lips.

“You beat her .. you tore off her clothes on the floor of our home … you raped you animal...and your act of violence cost us our baby.It wasn't enough that you tried to have your way with her months ago… you had to finish the job!”Liam seethed as he slammed his father's body to the floor and pressed his knees on both sides of his body pounding his fist into his face repeatedly.

The door flew open as Bastien came in to aide his king that was losing control over the tragedy that had taken hold of his family. “Your majesty… please let me take over sir. I serve at the bequest of the crown.” Bastien tried to break through the rage of his beloved king. Liam gripped Constantine's head and slammed it into the floor several times.Bastien dropped to his knees and pleaded with his king to let him take over to subdue the former king.

LIam rose to his feet as Bastien held a firm grip on the former king not that he was able to put up much of a fight. Constantine sat up with Bastien close by as he leaned forward processing everything his son had told him . What he found disheartening was hearing about the loss of a grandchild. “Liam… you say she lost the baby?” Silence in the room as Liam tried to calm his pulse and slow his heartbeat.

“In light of your actions and the two co- conspirators you will all be tried for treason. Crimes against the crown. This country will learn what a vile human being you are...a stain on the monarchy. I will not cover for your crimes. My priority is to my wife and my unborn child.”, he paused as the realization dawned on his father that Saige was still pregnant.

“Wait...what do you mean unborn child?”, he was flustered and confused.

“We learned after your violent actions against my wife that Saige was carrying twins. One baby did not survive as a result of you horrific,unscrupulous behaviour. I had to watch my wife be delivered another devestating blow after her rape when the doctor told her that she lossed a child that we never had a chance to meet. This… this death is blood on your hands. Everyone will learn what a monster you are and that you killed your own flesh and blood grandchild.You will stand trial before the council...and then to meet your maker. I hope you rot in hell for what you've done Constantine. Your legacy … will be that of a murderer and rapist to your own family.”

Liam picked up his blazer and slowly moved toward the door. He wouldn’t look back as he went to exit. As he was leaving her heard Bastien yell out , “unhand my service revolver!” Moments later a loud single pop escaped the room followed by a thud on the floor. Liam turned back and witnessed Bastien trying to revive Constantine to no avail. King father perished as a single gunshot to his head as he took his own life in that room. Bastien radioed to his staff to secure the scene and lock down any press to the palace until Queen mother is notified of his death.Liam walked down the hall blocking out the chaos taking place around him as he went back to his private quarters. He had not set foot in the royal apartments since leaving the morning of his trip to Italy. Upon walking into the living area his senses were awakened by the smell of cleaning solutions. His breath hitched as he came to the spot that he believed to be where his wife was taken from him that night. He moved to the bedroom with a suffocating feeling as he glanced to the bed that was still unmade. He eyed the IPad that was still beside her space in their bed where she laid down chatting with him on FaceTime. The spot that held a special place in his heart remembering how they laughed and planned to speak after her doctors appointment. He thought of her words where she mentioned feeling a craving for a snack...to feed their baby...babies before going to sleep.Liam peeled off his clothes, except his underwear and took in the scent of her sweet perfume intoxicated with jasmine and vanilla.He felt a burning sting in his eyes as he became overwhelmed with the thought of them making love in the rain the night before he left. Had he known that the following night would change their lives...had he insisted she travel with him to Italy. He gripped her pillow imagining her shampoo smelling of Gardenias. He put it to his nostrils and inhaled deeply as grief overtook his body. Liam’s body shook uncontrollably as he let out a scream as he sobbed.

“Why would he do this to her.. To us? She didn't deserve this.. Our baby didn't deserve this… all she wanted, we wanted was to plan for our family. How can i promised her to keep her safe when I couldn't even shield her in our home.” Liam lade his way to the bathroom and turned on the showed letting the steam filled the room. He stared at his broken blue eyes , red rimmed as he looked at a man he was used to seeing...defeated… afraid...heartbroken...betrayed. He knew he had to fight for her even if she couldn't fight for herself.

He slid out of his underwear and stood beneath the running water allowing the heat to pulsate his tensed muscles in his back and shoulders. Liam slumped down in the shower internalizing his pain and muffling his tears that were trapped in his throat. He cried for Saige, for their baby… but he felt nothing for the father that had deprived them of a family that is whole. After twenty minutes in the water he left the shower and dressed in jeans, a button down shirt and pull over sweater. He grabbed his keys and phone and headed back to the hospital ...alone.

****

Saige laid in bed staring at the ceiling trying to avoid the bereaved looks of sympathy from Olivia.Liam had sent off a text to Liv that he was on the way. Olivia had turned on the television trying to find a light hearted comedy to lighten the mood. “This movie looks good… I can't wait until we share a stiff drink after you have the baby, she smiled trying to lessen the all consuming thoughts in Saige’s mind. “Saige… what do you have a taste for? We can get anything your heart desires, ``she laughed.

Saige grew quiet, “ you can’t get me the baby I lost,''she whispered. Olivia could not help but feel a heavy heart for her friend. The thing that would help her heal was outside of her grasp. All she wanted was to plan for the day she and Liam would bring their little angels home. A moment later Liam entered the hospital room followed by Saige’s physician. Before he could say anything the doctor smiled and shared that she could head home.

“Your majesties...there has been a great improvement to your injuries and the baby is doing well.” Liam smiled reluctantly. He trained his blue eyes on Saige traveling down to her belly wanting to just touch her baby bump. He knew that would make her uncomfortable in this moment. Olivia could help but take notice of her king.

Ma’am...sir.. We recommend taking it easy for the next week or two. Free of stress .. focusing on your recovery and your pregnancy. Be mindful of any pains and cramping should it arise. You will need to eat a healthy diet and drink plenty of fluids. Listen to your body … rest frequently. Your majesty... I look forward to the official introduction of the royal heir.”,he smiled. “ I will go prepare your paperwork for your release,''the doctor exited the room.

“Baby… that's great news that you can go home … we can go home.”he reached for her hand when she began shaking her head violently, “I ..I can't go there Liam”, she panicked.

“No love… we are going to spend some time in /valtoria at your Duchy. I never had a chance to take you on a grand tour to take in the beauty. We should go there for awhile. I will work from there and .. and I can postpone any trips abroad for a bit.”, he looked on with a look of uncertainty. “Let's take time to deal with everything including the loss of our baby without prying eyes.”

“Liam… I know that you want to help, but I can't give you what you want. You deserve a woman that is of your social class and ilk. I cannot even protect your baby...what about the baby. Liam i am afraid to grow attached to this one because don't know if …”she trailed off with a few stray tears running down her face.

“Saige...we cant think that way. Am I sad that we lost a child...yes. We also owe to that baby to love the twin that shared your womb. We will stop thinking about the loss, but we also have to embrace the gift that is still with us. Let me take care of you and our baby that remains with us. I'm sure our other baby would want that”,he wrapped his arms around her trying to exude the love and support.

Olivia became moved by the tenderness between the two, “I'll go pack a bag for you to change Saige once your released. I'll be back soon, `` she quietly left the room and the couple to their thoughts.

“Valtoria will be good for us love… some time away from the palace. There is a lot that needs to be settled there . I only want you to focus on getting better and stronger. You are fierce and determined Saige. You are a force to be reckoned with in this country. I am so proud to have you in my life … as my wife...as the mother of my children… as my queen.” He kneeled before his queen kissing her hand, “I love you today just as much as the day we got married for the first time.” Liam flashed back to the afternoon in the judge;s chambers they traded vows of love and devotion,

“...I only live to serve you. I want my duty to be putting a larger smile on your face than the day before...You have shown me your my lighthouse in the storm guiding me safely to harbor. I vow to trust you and I to seek the right path… not always the easy one…”

Liam kissed the top of her head, “ I intend to live up to my vows love. I truly believe that Valtoria will become a respite during this challenging time. Today we face this hospital room mourning a great loss and crime...tomorrow you and I will wake up in paradise amongst the fields, wild flowers, mountains, streams,and waterfalls. Valtoria will be an oasis.. Our home away from home until you are ready to face the palace again.

[yourlocalmusicalprostitute]

Wino Roger Taylor x Reader

A/N: Im reposting this because it got lost in the vacuum og the internet & I want it to be seen. My Brian oneshot is going up soon & it'll be two parts. In the meantime enjoy this angst inspired by this song.

Warnings: angst, yelling, language (perhaps)

Word count: 1,022

Pairings: roger taylor x reader, ben!roger x reader

"Hi love." Roger could barely form a syllable as he drug his feet through the threshold of your shared home. The smell of liquor fell off of him and made your stomach churn with a mixture of disappointment and disgust.

This was the worst Roger had ever been.

"I don't know what you're drinking to forget about, but we're not doing this anymore. This is the last time you'll be walking through our door piss drunk at three in the fucking morning." You tried to stay as calm as possible, but the longer you looked at Roger more your anger started to rise.

Roger attempted to make steps toward you. He was seeing double and the foundations of the house felt as if they were moving from underneath him. "C'mon, I'm just havin' some fun -" his words were stopped by a series of burps.

Your hands went up in defeat as you turned your back to your husband to walk back to your bedroom. If your memory served you right, Roger will stumble onto the couch and pass out all twisted up until the next morning. "I can't deal with this." You mumbled hoping your words would only fall on your ears and not his.

"What?" Roger squinted at you, still swaying in one spot near the front door. You ignored him treading up the stairs until he spoke again, "Y/N don't leave."

"What Roger? What do you want?" You didn't turn to look at him. There was a silence in the air that you and Roger had never experienced before, it was the epitome of uncomfortable. In his drunken state all Roger desired was affection and his intoxication gave him the galls to ask for it. He swallowed the beer coated frog in his throat and said, "Come down here and give me a kiss."

You dropped your head for a moment. The hand supporting you on the rail of the stars ached due to how tight you were holding it. Roger couldn't read your body language through his heavy eyelids, but if he could he would run or fall to his knees profusely apologizing.

For a moment Roger thought his request for affection worked. You descended from the stairs slowly with a stoic look he confused with a look of seduction. It wasn't until you pushed past him and stomped into the kitchen that Roger had realized sex, or any form of physical love, were not in the cards for him that night.

Roger did his best to follow you. His eyes caught up just in time to see you reach into the refrigerator and pull out the two six-packs of beer he hadn't gotten the opportunity to drink yet.

"See this?" You asked pulling a bottle of beer away from its cardboard carrier. You dangled it between your thumb and index finger awaiting Roger's response. He only nodded.

As soon as he acknowledged the beer in your hand, you raised it above your head, and with all the power you could manage you spiked the beer bottle onto the floor. The noise made Roger jump. He had gained some sobriety after witnessing you smash the bottle.

"There's your damn kiss." You huffed through flared nostrils and grabbed another bottle. Another smash and more glass flew throughout the otherwise quiet house. "There's that dinner you ask me to cook but you come home too drunk to eat."

"Y/N..." Roger wanted to stop you but he couldn't. He had never made you this angry before. Smashing things was not in your character, it was more of his.

"No! Don't you speak until I'm done!" You only raised your voice slightly. Yelling wasn't something you had ever made a habit of and you didn't want to start now, but Roger needed to be silenced or he was going to talk his way out of this well needed wake up call.

You smashed another bottle feeling only momentary relief seeing the substance, that seemed to replace you for months now, go to waste. "Is this not good enough for you anymore? Would you rather redecorate? How about a neon sign above your dinning room table? What do you want the bar to be called, huh?"

All questioned you asked were rhetorical. With each one you smashed another bottle of beer. You hated the smell and taste of beer anyway. "I can buy peanuts and pretzels by the bulk! I'll let you smoke wherever and all your friends came come on over any time or day of the week! It'll be a party, a college dorm every night! Is that what it'll take to get you to come home?"

Roger could answer that question, "No." He choked out and you scoffed.

"Then what? What will it take for you to come home?" You asked and in one last swoop knocked the rest of the beer to the floor.

Roger remained quiet in fear that he would say the wrong words. After all, he was still shitfaced, and as badly as he wanted to hold you he knew approaching you wouldn't be the best idea.

You nodded your head at his silent response. There were tears sliding down the sides of your face, but you didn't allow your face to contort into the image of sadness and anger it wanted to. Instead you stared blankly into your husbands eyes. Your rapid blinking away of tears made Roger's chest feel hollow. He stood speechless, his blue eyes clouded with defeat.

There were no more words shared between you two. For the second time that night you passed Roger without looking at him, but this time he didn't move. He only dropped his head in shame and listened to the sound of your feet thundering up the stairs.

Roger chewed his lip to keep from crying. He sauntered to the couch and threw his feet up on the one side. There was no dancing around this and Roger knew it as he went to sleep.

His biggest fear was that he may lose you for good and after all of this, he might have.

[365daysofsasuhina]

[ 365 Days of SasuHina || Day Three Hundred Forty-Four: On an Island ] [ Uchiha Sasuke, Hyūga Hinata, Hoshigaki Kisame ] [ SasuHina ] [ Verse: Blue Waves and Black Flags ] [ AO3 Link ]

What else is an orphan lad of an island nation to do but become a pirate?

Hanging from a web of rigging, Sasuke watches the waves roll and feels the seaspray against his skin. It’s nearly the end of a cloudless day in late Spring, and the weather is about as fine as seafarers could ask for as night begins to fall. The wind ruffles his flyaway hair, a small smile on his face. Should be easy sleeping tonight with the calm waters.

As tough as life has been these past few years...he knows he’s simply lucky to see them passed. With most others sharing his blood long gone, Sasuke had little choice but to resort to the less lawful ways of surviving.

Of course...his current arrangement wasn’t, at first, intended. Attempting to filch some supplies from a slew of crates along his hometown’s dock one foggy morning, he’d found himself caught and hung upside down by an ankle. Protesting quite loudly, it hadn’t done much to sway the pirate that had caught him red handed in their goods.

“Seems a little rat’s nibbled his way into the rations,” he’d laughed, ignoring Sasuke’s thrashing. Solidly built and covered with ink, he’d gathered a few others around. “What d’you say, lads? Bit scrawny, ain’t he?”

“Put him down, Kisame,” a flame-haired man retorted. “He’s harmless, and we’ve got crates to load if we’re to make it to the meeting point on time.”

“Feisty little bugger, I have to say...seems a waste to let him sit here and starve…”

“We have enough children mucking about,” another man cut in. “We don’t need any more strays, Kisame.”

“What, we were all strays at some point, Sasori! How many of us can you say were conscripted at any sort of ripe old age? Not even you!”

“We’re still getting that blond brat to obey orders, let alone the albino. Last thing we need is another mouthy child to fight with before we get short and toss them overboard for the fish.”

At the threat, Sasuke had quickly settled down.

Kisame’s mouth had settled into a firm line, brow furrowed. “I’ll keep an eye on ‘im if it’s such a hassle, then. I’m not about to squander promising youth.”

“If he can pull his weight despite his being scrawny, then do what you will. Just keep him out of the way and get the supplies loaded.”

“Aye, Yahiko sir.” Setting Sasuke down, the one called Kisame had crouched, looking him over appraisingly. He’d seen his fair share of abandoned children on the docks, and had been one himself once upon a time. “...think you can trade a bunk and some food for manners and obeying orders, laddie?”

Still wary, Sasuke had realized he didn’t have much choice...and nodded.

“...good, then. Now...grab that sack, there. Can’t start too early, eh? Need to bulk you up,” he’d then taunted, ruffling the little Uchiha’s hair and chuckling at his protest. An arm flexed, showing the sizeable muscles. “Someday we’ll have you strong as an ox, but for now...best you start off light.”

And that was how Sasuke ended up on the ship among the group calling themselves the Red Dawn. Though not the only child, he’d been the youngest, close in age to those like Deidara and Hidan. The former detested him on sight, and the latter enjoyed having someone younger to pick on...but at least he was alive.

Now he’s fifteen, and though still far more lithe than Kisame and his bulk, is much stronger than he’d been when first discovered pilfering their supplies. Self assured, and maybe a little cocky, he’s one of the quickest and most agile of the crew, and it’s common to see him climbing about in the rigging like a monkey.

“Oi, boyo!”

Glancing over to his mentor, Sasuke leaps down to let Kisame speak to him face to face. “Aye, sir?”

“Find any frayed lines or slipping knots?”

“No, sir. Everything looks to be top form, sir.”

There’s a snort. “Always with the ‘sir’...I think I know well enough by now you respect me without you spittin’ the word every few words, hm?”

“Aye sir.”

Ignoring Sasuke’s smirk, Kisame gives his shoulder a shove. “Off to bed with you, then. We’ll be landing midday tomorrow, so best you be rested.”

At the notion, Sasuke can’t help but brighten. It’s been several weeks since they last made landfall, and he’s eager to get off the ship for a while and explore a new town. “Will we be moored long?”

“A few days, give or take. Just be sure you don’t get yourself into any trouble,” the elder pirate advises, giving the youth a rather pointed look. “None of your shenanigans from the last time we docked...got it?”

“It was just one brawl -”

“And you had two black eyes. Not to mention we were nearly ousted and thrown out. I’m serious, Sasuke...keep your head down. We can’t afford to muddy the waters.”

“...yes, sir.”

“To bed, then.”

Making his way below deck, Sasuke doesn’t waste much time crawling into the hammock he sleeps in, kicking off his boots and not bothering with anything else. He’ll just change in the morning before they make landfall and at least look somewhat presentable.

Until then...he swiftly falls asleep to the gentle rocking of the ship.

...at least, for a few hours.

“Sasuke...Sasuke!”

Eyelids squinting, they open as he hears his mentor’s voice. “...Kisame…?”

The pirate’s expression is solemn. “We’re coming up on a nasty squall...no avoiding it with the winds as they are. Best you get up and secure yourself before it hits.”

Sasuke’s gut sinks, but not entirely. They’ve faced storms before. Sure, some get lost now and then, but he’s yet to go overboard.

...and yet, Kisame’s face makes him wonder.

Slipping on his boots, he makes his way topside to a terrifying sight. Even as color peeks over the horizon, the rest of the sky is quickly being consumed by a reaching, contorting black. Clouds roll and tear at the ferocity of the winds, and the curtain of pounding rain is quickly approaching.

...this doesn’t look good.

The crew is shouting and running, moving to tie down anything that moves. Sasuke leaps into the fray, helping to check the rigging he only just finished securing the night before. The whipping winds snap the sails like thunderclaps, and he pales as perfectly good lines already show signs of stress.

This really isn’t good.

Waves begin to swell, cresting further and further over the deck. Clothes are quickly soaked, Sasuke moving to mop water from both heaven and sea from his face. He can barely see in the deluge…!

“Sasuke -!”

Squinting and turning to Kisame’s voice, Sasuke pales as a monster wave begins to tilt the ship, rearing up over them like a furious stallion.

He barely has time to take a breath before it hits him like a slap from a god. Turning and spinning as the water tries to pull him apart, he loses all sense of direction before being spat back up upon the surface.

Around him, several other crewmen attempt to grab on to anything nearby and floating. The ship slowly wobbles back the other way, swiftly drifting the other direction at the storm’s mercy.

With it goes any hope of being pulled back onto the deck. The ocean is too angry, too determined to see them drowned.

Managing to find a barrel, Sasuke clings to the bobbing lumber as lightning flashes and rain falls in sheets. Already his body is exhausted from its beating, and he knows it won’t be long until he can’t fight any longer. Curling his fingers as best he can into the ropes around his lifesaver, he holds on for dear life for as long as he’s able. But once his body gives up...it all goes black.

“...nn…”

Eyelids quivering, he rises into consciousness like a struggle against the tide. Where...what…?

Managing to open his eyes, Sasuke finds himself staring at...some kind of thatched roof…? But, he was on the ship, and...and…

...oh no…

Sitting up in a panic, he soon finds himself dizzy, collapsing back upon something soft. Bits and pieces of the morning before (or...whenever it was - how long was he out?) flicker through his mind, lingering exhaustion making the memories difficult to recall. But eventually he finds his feet, staggering out of what turns out to be a small hut.

Squinting against the sun, he finds himself not too far from a sandy beach peppered with stones. Stepping out, he stumbles far enough to get a better view of his surroundings. It looks like he’s one some kind of...island of some sort. What size he can’t know, or if there’s anyone else around.

...but someone had to build this hut.

Slowing panning his eyes, he stares as a figure approaches from one side of the shore. Somehow pale despite the sun, a curtain of dark hair hangs to her hips. Under an arm is a basket, and she comes up short as she spots him.

“Y...you’re awake!”

Feeling more caught in a fever dream than alive, Sasuke can’t manage a reply before his knees decide enough is enough. Crumpling, he sinks into the sand before his vision flickers and his body goes slack.

A gasp sounds from his unexpected companion. Racing over and setting aside her burden, she carefully takes his head in her lap. “...well...maybe you’re not quite r-ready to be on your feet,” she murmurs. With surprising strength, she drags him back inside, settling him atop the odd nest of fabric within that serves as a resting place. Next she fetches her basket, heavy with fruits. Ensuring he’s stable, she trades it for a net, walking back out into the sand and wading into the water.

For a moment she stands and stares before slipping beneath the surface. Just as she submerges, a flick of an amethyst tail sends water flipping into the air before she disappears.

                                                          .oOo.

     Oh golly it's late @~@      ...I wanna say I wrote something kinda like this before, but it's been so long and with SHM on top of it, I can't really recall what all I've done and when and for what, ahaha - forgive me if this sounds too familiar. I'm very tired and couldn't really think of anything else, RIP.      Anyway, I wanna say more but...too tired. I'm gonna go crash :'D Thanks for reading~