#i saw a post that was like ''minors probably have more time to consume media than adults so thats why a lot of minors in this day and age

[atypi-cals]

anyways I think the reason we have so many introjects from 2021-2022 specifically is cuz thats when we weren't in school and actually had time to watch media

[enviedear]

Hiii !! How are you? Pleasure to meet you!

I saw your engineering major!Anakin post and when I tell you I immediately twirled around on my bed and started kicking my feet like a fucking teenage girl… I’m not joking.

This is a headcanon that has been following me ever since I entered the beautiful world of Anakin Skywalker. Seriously. I even have a one shot about lmaoooo

Could you please elaborate on that? I would love to hear your takes, discuss them and just thirst over him together! Because god lord, I’m so grateful to found someone who was the same interest on engineer Anakin. Also bonus points for college student Anakin because that’s just hot as fuck

Thank youuuu

Mina

i literally am obsessed over this concept thank you so much for indulging me! i centered it over him in college mostly because— i just... it does things to me.

also what if i said engineering major!anakin fic in the works...

a few nsfw themes in here so minors dni i will block you <3

he strikes me as the type of guy you'd see once on campus and then immediately try to find him on the university's social media accounts.

he wouldn't be fucking anywhere until you find the engineering college's Instagram account

it hasn't had a single post in two years but it's okay because you find one of him !!!

and the only picture of his face is so grainy, but he's in it and he looks so fucking hot at his computer and that's enough

also he's totally unapproachable

not that he's a dick or anything, he's just cussing out all his professors in his head and worried about his last materials exam

i think in his (very limited) spare time he'd be into either metalworking or cars... probably both

like i think he could fix almost any car-related issue without having to go to a shop

axel on his car goes out? yeah he's ordering the part and putting it on his damn self

his motor blows up? he's spending his summer rebuilding it while taking sixteen hours of summer classes

and if he does have to go to a shop, it's strictly because he doesn't have time and he most certainly will pop the hood and check their work

also i believe he'd like stick shift

literally won't buy a car unless it's manual

"what the fuck is the point of an automatic"

he totally also learns how to tune in his free time and everytime you hear a car speed by you on campus you just know it's his work

now, if you're lucky enough to catch his eye i truly believe he'd be so fucking consumed by you

he'd ask you to go everywhere with him; he needs to study in the library? he's asking you to come. he has to give a dissertation? he's begging you to come watch him. it's 3am and he just finished his statics project? he's calling you like, 'baby please come with me to get food. I'll buy you a treat.'

also the biggest and most clingy bf ever in the history of the world

will stop doing his work to come watch you play the sims and just hold you (also tells you how to build a proper house despite you bing like,, "ani... the fun part is making them get into trouble not making sure their roof is durable.")

also likes to be incentivized with you

"if i get an a on this next test will you let me bend you over the desk?"

or, "i'll study better if you let me taste you, please baby?"

star-student, no question.

and he's so fucking smart it's a bit annoying because he'll bitch and moan about how bad he's doing while getting on the dean's list every year

the way he explains what he's working on is hot as fuck

numbers make sense to his mind in ways you will never understand, but good lord is it nice to watch his smart little mouth move

type of man to take you on a date into the city and point out the shitty infrastructure

"for as much rain as we get you'd think these fucking idiots would have put more drains."

"that bridge is due to fall in less than ten years, what the fuck were they thinking."

he's just the smartest boy, and you make sure to tell him any chance you get not that he agrees but he'll always say, "thank you pretty girl"

[ooooshetriesss]

Hey yall! Super quick reminder; This is MOST definitely a 18+ blog

(Which I feel is made clear) but IF for some reason I have blocked u, (which I usually never do) plz know it’s bcuz I saw u engaging w/my content/following me & either found indications u were underage OR no clear indication u we’rent a minor (ageless +faceless blogs/bios)

While I don’t owe an explanation of my boundaries to anyone as no is both as explanation & response; I NEVER wanna come across as rude/disrespectful to followers of my content, as well as the community in general, & while I understand ppl usually explore things prior to turning 18… I NEED YALL to know I CANNOT have me NOR my content have anything to do w/that… any creator who is ok w/that is probably someone u should stay away from.. while certain aspects of my post are msgs I think are important regardless of age, (I.e. being ace or Demi doesn’t make u less valid, or rope CAN absolutely be platonic)

THESE are NOT things you should be actively exploring in the community/looking up until ur of age..

Hell… for me, im insanely grateful finding rope when I did cause HAD I found it/ tried to get into the bdsm community at the fresh age of 18; holy f*ck …. I really don’t know if I would be alive (& that’s not an exaggeration; I’m 100% serious)

Rope + BDSM can be AMAZING & insanely fun & done safetly ; platonically in a cool environment.. it can be ALL those things…

But ONLY if you don’t rush into things; approach it w/AWARENESS, knowledge & care.

And a BIG part of that comes with age+experience idc what anyone says…

and NO! trusting the WRONG ppl or making a BAD CALL doesnt make u STUPID. hell; it makes u HUMAN!

and sadly, being younger makes us far more trusting.. it takes a few heart breaks/lessons to truly become aware NOT everyone means well… & to put it bluntly.. that is NOT soemthing u want to find out while you are bound at someones feet…

Can something still go wrong when ur of age OFC…

But u’ll be better equipped to where u maybe able to handle it…

A tree can’t heal when it’s hacked up as a young plant… it NEEDS a foundation..

Once it GETS that foundation.. even if something horrible happened… a huge storm took half of it out.. it’s more than likely able to grow back..

It’s not fully destroyed.

It actually has a fighting chance..

It’s the same concept waiting until ur of age to get into the scene.

Also, while I empathize with the amount of things this generation has been exposed to; to the point they’re truly desensitized when it comes to overtly graphic images both violent & sexual whether it be thru the internet + media..(hell even going to school everyday w/the knowledge u could be in class w/the next school shooter…

My dudes; my dudettes.. theydies, Naydies.. my brothers in keyboards & Christ…

I CANNOT… like absolutely CANNOT HAVE/ condone MINORS consuming my content/in my blog.. in my community.. anything like that.

(For what it’s worth; I’ll prob still be here up to the same shenanigans when ur actually of age so; u can swing by then)

But AS someone who was exposed to things that were FAR beyond appropriate for my age… someone who grew up & took pride in those words "Your so mature for your age" "youre so wise beyond ur yrs"

before those vry phrases were weaponized against me..

it affects u in ways you can’t even begin to fully appreciate until ur much older..

And while I always rolled my eyes hearing “you wouldn’t understand at your age” (bcuz most the times it was said to me; it was BS) this is absolutely a case & point where it applies 100%

If there’s 1 things an abundance of images LIKE these & the vast amounts of overtly sexual content out there (porn included) soils /absolutely destroy when it comes to young minds.. young ppl

It’s the most sacred thing of all…

Connection..

I can’t even begin to put into words or # the amount of yrs I suffered & connections I lost because of what was destroyed because of that.

It’s taken A LOT of healing… A LOT of shadow work, A LOT of therapy; lol. THAT work is why I have such a positive foundation for my play today.

But quite literally the most beautiful thing about all of this, gets destroyed..because u didn’t build ur ideas based off of actual human experience.. it was fantasies projected for you; onto u, scripts that wwre acted out infront of you to sell content, to sell an image..

but they dont make that differentiation; its just portrayed as 'how it is', all at a time when ur brain is STARVING for 1) information 2) connection .. a time in youe life when ur body is regulating its hormones & brain chemistry to create 'the adult its trying to become'

we really go thru 2 puberty's as humans; one in our teens & the other in our early 20's before our brain fully develops at 25.

(theres actually been recent studies that suggest neurodivergent brains don't finish fully developing until they're 30s ; something that would absolutely explain a lot in my personal case... & yet are seen/treated legally as ADULTS at 18..

Says a lot they don’t want u to drink till your 21; but you can sign your life away to the military at 18…👀

No one ‘magically’ turns into an adult at 18… life is SO much more complex than that. But it’s quite literally the bare minimum in giving urself a chance at a healthy happy relationship w bdsm or rope. (& if ur anything like me… you’ll probably still absolutely fk up then 😂; BUT you will be BETTER EQUIPPED to protect urself.

Save urself the trauma, the time… start exploring these themes-content when ur OF AGE!!!

So… if I blocked/remove u… PLS know..: it’s done out of love & protection.

💗♥️💗 ILU all

Be kind to yourself, be patient with yourself. You are worth the wait. I promise… ANYONE playing+rigger who IS worth working w WILL NEVER pressure + press you…& they CERTAINLY wouldn’t even LOOK at u until u were of age. Full stop.

And ofc, if a creator says MDNI, RESPECT THEIR BOUNDARIES/consent.

Thank u for coming to yet another TedTalk; sincerely; @ooooshetriesss aka hummmmingbird aka Fil 💗

[possiblydistasteful]

Pinned Post :)

THIS IS A SIDEBLOG, I follow back from my main (wescravings)

Basics: Frank, he/him, either an ancient withered hag or a baby depending on who you're asking (read: over 25 younger than 50). Queer leftist. I think we should have MORE kink at pride. I love freaks, perverts, and sexual deviants. I love pornography, degeneracy, and filth. Anti-censorship. Yes, even for stuff that I personally find repulsive: If it's not hate speech and doesn't involve the exploitation of an actual living child then it has a legal right to exist regardless of taste* Genuinely just here for a good time and to post annoying shit about fictional characters. I am always STOKED to talk to people about my pretend people du jour, asks and tumblr DMs always open even if we're not mutuals, and if you ever send me questions about my art or fic I am literally proposing marriage right now (psspsspss etc) Currently Posting: Right now it's mostly Succession (tagged: succession) and Saw (tagged: sawposting) but this is a multifandom blog. Various other things I have posted about in the past and probably will again in the future include: horror media of all kinds (especially games and movies), Pathologic, The Exorcist (TV), Mr. Robot, Better Call Saul and Breaking Bad, Metal Gear Solid (my beloved), The Untamed/MDZS, Bloodborne, Black Sails, The Terror... I have really varied interests and tend to hop all over the place.

I like a lot of Freak Shit™, so if you don't like horror in your horror media/transgressive themes in your fiction (violence/murder/gore, incest, consent issues, depictions of various -phobias and -isms etc) I'm probably not the blog for you. I try and tag at least the fandom and common triggers for my posts , and if you ask me to tag something I will do my best to remember, but I often post from not even the APP but the site from a mobile browser, and that shit is glitchy as hell. Also I'm deeply forgetful, so just a heads up if you rely on trigger warnings and tags. Links: Main/Art Blog (wescravings) AO3 (Adoxography) Spotify and mutuals are welcome to my discord (dm me) I Block: MINORS. I'm sure you're all very cool, but I post too much adult content and while I know I can't actually stop anyone from viewing/consuming my adult work, I have ZERO interest in interacting with kids/teens about it.

Also: bigots (racists, homophobes, and misogynists etc) in general, but in specific (for those who don't think the label 'bigot' applies): terfs, swerfs, and transmeds. queer gatekeepers (fuck you aces n aros are sick as hell 🤘), terminology discoursers, and sexual puritans.

I also will block anyone I find annoying because I'm a crotchety bastard and I highly encourage you to do the same (even/especially if the annoying person is me). *for fandom specifically YES this is the exact same as a proship position, so if I notice you have proship DNI on your blog I will also block you because I respect your boundaries 💅

[ironwoodprotectionsquad]

just saw a take in the anti-rwde tag so bad i had a whole allergic reaction /hj

it was about how rewrites are NEVER good because it ignore's the writers' work, and that if you make rewrites you never actually enjoyed the content.

like okay, i guess AU writers hate the content they pull from! because AUs do technically count as rewrites, just probably not what OP was thinking of (*cough* fixing rwby *cough*). actually, technically all fanfics are rewrites to some degree! fuck it! everyone who writes fanfic is actively ignoring the writers' hard work! damn!

sorry for disagreeing, but i personally think making rewrites means you're more passionate than if you were to just passively consume the content you were given! because you're putting effort into ignored characters, dropped plot threads, unexplored worldbuilding and lore, etc.! who are you to judge if someone's way of appreciating content is wondering how things could have gone differently, expanding on what the writers' didn't pay attention to? there is NOTHING WRONG with wanting to rewrite something, whether it's because you're just curious about how things could go differently or if you're unsatisfied with what you got. hell, even the rewrites i HATE i still hold some respect for because damn, take it from someone who tried and gave up, making rewrites is HARDDDD, ESPECIALLY for a show like rwby with so many characters and other factors to take into consideration

anyway, sorry for ranting in your askbox lol, i'm just so....jesus christ that take made me MAD.

Hey anon! First off never EVER apologize for ranting in my inbox! I don’t mind, I know sometimes venting out your frustrations can help you feel better. I do that a lot on my blog when something annoys me so I get how therapeutic it can be.

Secondly I have never gone into the anti-rwde tag because I know I would die after a few posts. I will stick to the RWDE and James Ironwood tags where I belong lolZ.

Regarding the meat of this ask, holy shit I just- why just why? How can you look at a show like RWBY that regularly and actively takes things like themes and character arcs and say that someone making a rewrite doesn’t love the original subject? People don’t waste time on things they don’t care about. We have limited free time to do shit we’re not going to waste it working on a project that does absolutely nothing for us.

I have a morbid curiosity for what they think of AUs because how this person describes it, they should be even worse then rewrites because aus fundamentally completely overturn what the original work was. It’s all about taking the characters you love and plopping them in something completely different from their canon universes. It is literally about exploring the infinite possibilities that a universe holds. Personally I almost exclusively write in Aus in anything longer then a one or two shot. They’re just so much more interesting to me to explore because I love seeing how minor things change the bigger picture and what these characters do.

Hey you know everyone is allowed to have their own opinions and they literally don’t hurt anyone just like how rewrites and AU’s aren’t hurting anyone. They’re a way someone expresses their love for whatever it is the rewrite or Au is for just like fanart. Just because their are certain things one would change doesn’t mean they still don’t enjoy the base media the rewrite is for. Their is always something that we love in it what’s why we create for it.

I may not like every rewrite or au or whatever for any fandom I love but I still respect the work put into it because these fics take a lot of work and time and effort and writers do this for free. Their is no way to get any compensation for fic writing yet people do it anyways because they love the thing being written about and this is how they express that love. That whole sentiment is just insane for me and reeks of a mega fan refusing to understand that their precious show might not be perfect and that sometimes people might have a better idea for something. Or even if it isn’t it still has value and these mega fans are just wrong about it not having value. As I said it takes time and effort and people won’t waste time on something they don’t care about or enjoy it helps no one and trying to pretend otherwise is just insane to me.

[autisticcassandracain]

I have many thoughts on the weird phenomena in the DC fandom and the Batfam fandom specifically where probably the majority of people just straight up. haven’t interacted with the source material. and almost all of those thoughts can be summarized as ‘lmao that’s weird and mildly concerning’.

and because I’m annoying I will list them all here right now <3

1. To preface this post, I mean, obviously, comics are inaccessible as all hell, both in the disability kind of way and the ‘you need to understand the concept of hypertime to fully comprehend the DC timeline’ kind of way. Because of this, even if you don’t have a disability that prevents you from reading comics, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to look at the amount of comics you need to read to have even a base understanding of a character and go ‘no thanks <3′ and just enjoy fanart and fanfic in a vacuum. Ultimately, this is fandom, this is supposed to be fun, it doesn’t really matter.

2. That said, it’s VERY weird to me that the majority of this fandom just straight up hasn’t interacted with the source material, and moreover, that it’s considered rude to tell people that they should do so. It’s especially weird considering the amount of fanon-only fans I’ve seen who straight up have a superiority complex over canon. The idea that it’s gatekeeping to tell fans of something to actually interact with canon is just. so weird, and a fundamental misunderstanding of what ‘gatekeeping’ actually entails. 

3. But honestly I’m less interested in discussing the ways in which canon and fanon fans should interact with each other (personally, I think it would be helpful to create separate tags of some kind, but that’d require quite a big overhaul of the current fandom state) than in figuring out how this actually happened in the first place. On the one hand, it’s obvious; long-running superhero comics the way DC writes them have made themselves so thoroughly inaccessible that most people are simply too daunted to even try. Most media has a cohesive beginning and end (or at least, a planned end somewhere). Comics just... don’t.

But I do think it says something that, even among people who are clearly interested in the characters (since they have, you know, entire blogs about them), the effort to get into comics just seems to be too much to even bother. This really doesn’t bode well for the future of DC Comics. Obviously, I am no expert on anything at all ever, but I’d personally be surprised if DC survives beyond the few decades, at least in its current form/without a big overhaul.

4. But on the other hand, I don’t think the confusing state of DC Comics is the only thing to blame here. Fandom has a well-known problem with reducing any character down to archetypes to more easily ship and write fic/make content with. This problem is particularly prominent in fanfic, which, if you read enough of it, you’ll eventually start seeing not just the same tropes and trends, but essentially the same fics over and over again. And not just within the same fandom; everywhere, or every large fandom, at least. 

Fanon Batfam is entirely built on a bunch of those tropes; insecure/depressed sadboy Tim, team mom with optional hidden trauma/emotional problems Dick, bad boy with a heart of gold + sadboy combo Jason, abused sadboy Damian/angry easily-villified-for-fic-reasons monster Damian, good dad Bruce for found family fic and bad dad Bruce for angst fic, etc. This all culminates in a found family dynamic that’s generic and malleable to whatever fic the writer wants to write.

(This isn’t getting into the ship fic, which I avoid like the plague because the vast majority of it is incest, but I’d bet real actual money that the tropes in those fics fall under what is often preferred by the Migratory Slash Fandom.)

By having a decent excuse not to get into canon (the inaccessibility of comics) and a, by now, well-established fanon fandom, many fans feel free to use the batfam fandom as essentially an excuse to write whatever fic with reduced archetypes and tropes they personally feel the itch to write, without having to bother with even consuming a canon. This is compounded by the fact that canon itself is often contradictory and frankly bad, meaning that whatever interpretation of a character you want/need to go for your fic is at least theoretically backed up by canon (for example, you can just as easily cast Bruce as an abusive shithole dad who his kids need to get away from as a loving father figure who cares deeply for his children), which you can always use as a defense if people question your characterization.

5. This focus on fandom trends and tropes over actual creativity or care for the characters is also visible in the way bigotry manifests in this fandom; namely, in literally the exact way you’d expect. The female characters and characters of colour are shuffled to the side, non-existent, vilified, and/or reduced to harmful stereotypes. 

Barbara is probably the one I saw the most often in fanfic, but usually just as ‘Dick’s girlfriend’, and even then, she was often vilified for Dick angst (especially in fics about examining Dick’s trauma from his canon sexual assault; Kori also often gets the short end of the stick in those). After that, probably Stephanie, who fanon fans don’t really seem to know what to do with, so she’s basically just there as comic relief waffle girl, most of the time, though sometimes she can be used to either further Tim angst or further vilify Tim, whatever the fic calls for. Cass has gotten included more in batfam fics as of late, likely in response to critiques of fandom racism for leaving her out, but again, it’s clear people don’t actually know what to do with her. She’s often reduced to a racist stereotype of a quite, stoic therapist for whatever guy du jour needs it. That, or she’s in Hong Kong and just not there. Duke especially gets left in the dust in fandom, usually just being non-existent, but when he’s there, he’s almost always nothing more than the straight man for the actual fun characters to play off of. Talia probably has it the worst, though, and almost universally gets vilified by fanon stans in order to write sadboy Damian.

All of this is extremely predictable behaviour and falls entirely in line with general fandom misogyny and racism; ignoring or vilifying women and characters of colour, or using them as very minor characters at best. The only two characters of colour who aren’t regularly left out of fic are Dick and Damian, who are both also conveniently the two characters most often drawn and written in a whitewashed manner. In addition, there’s a real trend of demonizing Damian in fanon fics where he isn’t written as an abused sadboy, which I’d argue is in no small part due to fandom racism, considering Damian’s behaviour is in no way as bad as Jason’s, who doesn’t get anywhere close to the same demonization and gets woobiefied instead. I also find it convenient that Damian is probably the batboy who receives the most vilification in fic, when he’s the most obviously non-white of the batboys they’re willing to acknowledge.

Fandom often cries for more diversity in canon, only to ignore the diversity already there and focus on the same generic white guys. The batfam fandom is a brilliant example of this.

Which is not to say that fandom racism and misogyny isn’t present in the canon parts of the fandom (and canon itself); it absolutely 100% is. But I’ve found that canon fans are also more likely to like and care about at least one of the characters I’ve listed as ignored/vilified, and are willing to create and consume content for them, whereas fanon fans... aren’t, really. I’ve never seen a fan of fanon Cass the way I’ve seen fans of fanon Dick, for example. Obviously, this could just be by coincidence, or I’ve just surrounded myself with people like that, but it’s been a trend I noticed. Racism and misogyny is present in every part of this fandom and should be addressed as such, but I feel like it manifests the most blatantly in the fanon parts of this fandom. 

(I’d also recommend the articles Migratory Slash Fandom’s Focus and Beige Blank Slates, which expand more on the type of fandom racism I think is especially prominent in the batfam fandom, as well as literally every article in the What Fandom Racism Looks Like series.)

6. All this leads me to conclude that the majority of fanon fans don’t actually like the characters all that much; they’re convenient excuses for them to participate in fandom. Which I also think is, in no small part, a reason why so many of them react so negatively to being told to pick up a comic; they came to this fandom specifically to consume it as a fandom, because they wanted the fandom experience without having to consume a canon. 

This is not a phenomena unique to the batfam fandom (again, see the Migratory Slash Fandom), but it does fascinate me. While fandom is often said to be an experience focusing on transformative art, I think it’s also safe to say that, especially as fandom has become more mainstream, an increasing amount of people are looking to it less as a way to engage with their favourite pieces of media, and more as a type of media in and of itself. I think the reasons for this are similar to the reasons mass media entertainment like the MCU are so popular; you gain a lot of enjoyment out of it with very little risk involved. 

By consuming the same fics of the same characters (or the same archetypes) over and over again, you are rarely at risk of being challenged or even disappointed. It’s often very clear right from the start whether or not a fic will appeal to you, and if it isn’t, it’s easy to just look for another one. It requires less emotional investment than most other types of media, even ‘popcorn media’ like the MCU - or, yes, DC Comics. It’s safe, it’s enjoyable, it’s comforting, like McDonalds, but just like McDonalds, it’s ultimately bland and unsubstantial. 

7, TL;DR. Ultimately, I don’t think it’s like, wrong to enjoy the fanon version of the batfam without wanting to engage with canon, and I certainly don’t think it’s okay to harrass people over it. But I do think it’s in large part based on a desire to interact with fandom rather than other pieces of media because people are scared of being let down by those pieces of media (or worse, just uninterested in actually thinking), which is mildly concerning. 

[freckledbodty]

Stripping Away The Bloat - The Umibe No Etranger Movie Did The Manga Dirty

I finally got around to watching the movie of Umibe no Etranger - a movie I didn’t know existed based on one of my old favourite BL mangas. And oh boy, does this adaptation reflect a painful trend in manga to anime/movie adaptations overall. Allow me a moment to rant, if you will...

TL;DR: READ THE MANGA BY THE LOVE OF GOD IT’S WONDERFUL. Also the movie is super pretty, but here’s a semi-detailed look at why it still really didn’t do the manga justice. You bet I came with receipts.

A few important notes before you start: 

1. Remember this is just my opinion, and I’d love to hear other people’s point of view on the matter, whether you agree or disagree! 

2. I am not fluent enough in Japanese to read the original without a translation, so my thoughts on the manga are coming from fan translations, which 100% might have affected how I view this! The anime I’m a little more sure on as I can generally tell when the subtitles have deviated, but that does mean I may have missed something/something was lost in translation that means something I say here is incorrect. I’m very sorry for this, so remember this is my view based on the media types I’ve consumed. 

3. Also the manga cuttings I use are not the best quality because of tumblr’s sizing, so even more of a reason to go read the books yourself! 

I’m aware I’m very late to this party, but when I saw the other day that this movie had been made, I was horrified that I hadn’t known about it sooner. I read the manga years ago, and adored it - it’s genuinely a sweet and beautifully drawn romance, and I’d highly recommend it to anyone. With that, however, the movie was a huge disappointment to me and I just need to have a moment to gush in a less than positive way. 

The Pros: 

Let’s get this out of the way, I’d still probably recommend this movie to anyone who likes romance anime-style movies. It’s beautifully animated. Seriously, this movie is stunning, with wonderful expressions, bright colours, and a pretty well suited soundtrack too. The animation tries to match the original art style of the manga, and frankly, I think it captures it perfectly. 10/10. Gorgeous. Watch it just for the prettiness. 

I’m also a big fan of any BL/GL adaptations that get a little more into the mainstream. This movie is definitely a huge win in terms of representation, especially when the manga (on the whole) avoided the more negative tropes that the BL/GL genres have historically been known for. (More on that later...) So that’s a win, and I will take it. 

The Bloat Cut: 

To put it simply, this movie fell into the trap of what I call (in my head) ‘cutting out the bloat’. As a long-time anime and manga fan, who has seen countless adaptations over the years, it’s a common theme that tends to make or break an anime. 

‘Cutting out the bloat’ to me means that the adaptors cut out a lot of the ‘smaller’ moments and panels that are seen in a manga. This movie was thankfully very good at following the original plot and took us through the same beats that the manga did (many adaptations don’t bother doing that at all), but they left out a lot of the extra stuff - the aforementioned ‘bloat’. 

The bloat isn’t really bloat in that it is pointless, however: the problem is that these little moments and scenes are seen to be pointless by the adaptors. Again, understandable: they have a limited run time, and it’s hard to include every little tiny moment, especially when they are ones that are easily scanned passed. Some bloat cutting is necessary to make an adaptation viable at all, but sometimes, it can be hugely detrimental to the piece. Umibe no Etranger is a key example of this. 

Setting: 

I watched this movie without rereading the manga, and as such, I was quickly thrown off by how bad the movie was. This was one of my favourite mangas, wasn’t it? Had I really had such terrible taste? (Yes, let’s not go there, but this manga was not one of my high-school bad decisions). 

The characters felt strange. Personalities did complete 180s after the time skip and did some questionable things that I couldn’t recall finding issue with when I read the manga. The two main characters felt so hot and cold that it didn’t feel like the story I remembered. Even the pacing felt off and janky at times. 

After watching, I went back and reread the manga, and this is where I saw all the ‘bloat’, the little intricate moments and minor panels that were easy to overlook but made the story what it was. Here’s a few of the biggest examples I could find. 

Shun:

Oh, Shun. What did they do to you? 

Shun’s character was bizarre. In the first 15 minutes of the movie, he was bubbly, friendly, and even bold enough to flirt with Mio. After the time skip, he was sour, cold, and completely withdrawn from the world. I understood Mio’s confusion because after the time jump he was a completely different character. 

The manga is often focused on Shun and his inner thoughts, and he’s the one who is hurt the most by the bloat cutting. For starters, he wasn’t as over-the-top friendly at the start of the manga as he was in the anime, and we’re able to see his inner thoughts and worries that cause his reservations from the first few pages we meet him. We also get more hints earlier on as to Shun’s past that explain a lot of his behaviour as a whole, as well as getting little hints as to why he’s even more negative and exhausted after the time jump. 

Mio: 

The biggest bloat cut out in terms of Mio is the big plot point of the phone call. For context, before leaving for the time skip, Mio promises to call Shun once he’s gotten to his new home. In the movie, this is never really brought up again, focusing on the relationship in the present, but this was a huge point to leave out. I think it was cut out because it was explained in one short scene in the manga, and therefore easily mistaken for bloat. 

In the manga, it’s explained that Mio does call, but it’s Eri who answers, and there’s a very important conversation that sets up Mio’s whole character development and explains why he returns to the island set on having a relationship with Shun. Eri warns him that calling Shun, despite knowing that Shun has feelings for him, is cruel and unfair, and tells Mio he shouldn’t contact him unless he’s worked out his feelings. It’s a great scene, and a real shame to leave out when it explains firstly why Mio never called back, and secondly why he is so adamant about his feelings and love for Shun when he does finally return: because he saw Eri’s warning to mean ‘don’t come back unless you are serious’.

Relationship:

In the movie, Mio and Shun didn’t really seem to have a relationship until the drama kicked up and then it quickly seem to disappear again. Shun was extremely held back and reserved, and barely ever seemed to return Mio’s feelings (even in the scenes he was instigating) - he even totally avoided anything resembling physical contact at first. 

Compare this to the manga, where there are little hints of their relationship progressing throughout the chapters. For one, Shun is never as cold and blank as he seems in the film, and when he does seem that way, the manga quickly shows a glimpse of his thoughts to explain how he’s exhausted or distracted - without those little bloated thought bubbles, he just seems... a little cruel frankly.

A really good example of this is the beach kiss scene. In the movie, as Mio is about to kiss him, Shun suddenly announces that he’s hungry and avoids the kiss altogether, leaving Mio confused. 

In the manga, they actually do kiss - it’s their first kiss, in fact. Shun seems embarrassed and his ‘I’m hungry’ feels like more of a way to distract them both. He explains he’s exhausted (which is fair enough, this is a big thing for him to process on little sleep that his inner thoughts earlier in the chapter already set up) rather than just outright shunning him. (Ha. Shun. shun. Get it?) 

A more *noted* bloat they cut out is that Shun and Mio get physical in the manga way earlier than the movie, the touches just not quite being everything Mio wanted. Without those more tender moments, where they actually seem like a couple, it seems like Mio is chasing after Shun desperately, whilst Shun couldn’t care less about him. It detracts from the whole relationship. Below are some examples of the two of them actually seeming like a couple that were cut from the movie, including longing looks from Shun, Shun hugging Mio whilst he’s asleep, and Shun asking to kiss and touch Mio. 

The Issue: 

Bloat cutting always annoys me, but usually, if it’s not hindering the story, I don’t mind. What bothers me most of all in this movie, is that without these subtle little panels and moments, the relationship between Shun and Mio seems... forced, frankly. In the movie, Shun seems to be the instigator of the flirting, and then after the time skip he acts practically disgusted, avoiding a lot of Mio’s advances, and we don’t get to hear his inner thoughts like we do in the manga to explain why he’s feeling this way. 

In the manga, during these ‘bloat’ pieces, Shun is an actual willing participant in the relationship, and Mio isn’t just forcing his advances onto Shun. It’s natural. It’s not flipping between hot and cold, or suddenly ramping up after a big moment of drama, it’s slow and careful and a real relationship. 

This would be a bad change in any adaptation, but it’s especially so in this one. Anyone who is a fan of BL specifically is probably aware of the genre’s bad rep historically for having some... questionable consent issues. This manga didn’t have them. The movie? I’m not so sure, and that’s why it’s rubbed me the wrong way. I could spend another 1000 words talking about this issue as a whole, but I’ll leave it there, you get the idea.

Expected? Yes. Okay? Meh. 

There’s no real point to this post aside from to complain a little and point out just how much more the source material gives us. Cutting the bloat always happens, and I don’t want it to stop happening per say, that would be impossible, but I’d kill for adaptors to just take a little more time to work out what is unnecessary and cutable bloat, and what is something they should really keep in. 

The movie is still cute and beautifully made, so please go watch and see for yourself! Mostly, I’d highly recommend the manga: it’s got the same gorgeous art style, only about 5 chapters long, and the story and relationship is that little bit more firmly built. 

I’ll stop ranting now, and I hope this actually made sense? Anyway, congrats on making it all this way.

[rustycottoncandy]

Hi! I don't know how, but congratulations! You found my blog. Here you have some information about my page and I:

You can call me by any of the three words in my URL (Rusty, Cotton, and Candy), though my most used name is Rusty.

My pronouns are She/Her. I won't throw a brick at you if you misgender me, though. I don't really mind what people refer to me as.

• Sometimes I ask people to send me art requests, so if you see a post of mine with the tag #request time!, feel free to ask!

• I don't do commissions yet, since I still don't know how it works at all and I don't have so much time so I can't do them yet. But I will! Some day!

• A part of my content may be based on the fandoms I'm in, so if you're in them too, then you might enjoy my page.

I've got original characters (OCs), so you'll probably see a few posts here and there about them, whether they're just spilling information or drawings.

Fandoms I'm in/media I've consumed: Mamma Mia, Steven Universe, The Owl House, Dead End: Paranormal Park, Rick and Morty, The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals, Be More Chill, Heathers The Musical, Heathers (1988), Gravity Falls, She-Ra Reboot, Undertale, Deltarune, Hamilton: An American Musical, Infinity Train, Nerdy Prudes Must Die, Mean Girls, La Sombra Del Viento (The Shadow Of The Wind [I haven't finished it yet though]), Beetlejuice: The Musical, Ride The Cyclone, the entire Saw saga, and Warrior Cats.

I SOMETIMES, and I repeat, SOMETIMES make comics. It's not an everyday thing and neither is this blog centered around making comics, but you might see one or two every now and then.

• I am from Spain. My native language is Spanish, so excuse me if I misspell a word sometimes.

• I'm a minor (15, specifically), so keep your +18 spam the hell away from me.

• My birthday is on June 10th.

• Other social media:

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- Instagram

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- Toyhouse

If you send me an art request you can ask me to draw...

- OCs

- Cats

- Furries

- Humans

- Ships (Only if they're ocs or a cannon/head cannon ship from the fandoms I'm in)

- Any character from the previously mentioned pieces of media.

If you send me an art request, I won't do...

- NSFW (excluding gore-y stuff)

- Anything that has to be with MAP content

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DNI if you are...

Racist, Zoophile, Transphobe, Homophobe, Nazi Supporter, MAP/Pro-MAP, or a porn blog.

TAGS:

#my stuff -> Personal posts or rants about things that happen to me or that I want to talk about.

#my thoughts -> Self-explanatory.

#oc stuff -> Stuff about my OCs.

#art -> Self-explanatory.

#kitty! -> Cat pictures. Foxes and bats may appear occasionally too.

#doggo! -> Dog pictures.

#birdie! / #birb! -> You guessed it, bird pictures.

Extra:

- Secondary blog... Probably?: @modernsourlettuce

- PLEASE tag me in posts that involve glitter, whether they're drawings, stimboards or anything else that has to do with glitter, it'll be much appreciated!!

- OC TAGS:

Freak House / Downfall [Henry, Ethan, Cocoa, Daniel, Jan, Jenelia, Leonard, Sadie, Sam, Amy, Edward, Andrew, Aiden, Alba, Emerald]

Smooth Roses [Melody / Alice, Jackie / Jackalyn, Rick / Richard, Owen, Gabriel, Rose, Nicholas, Avery, Saturn, Autumn, Samuel, Shane]

Fuentebuena [Víctor / Victor, Claire / Clara, Button, Melmelada, María, Helena, B-Cat, Hide]

E&C Adventures [Evan & Caleb]

Dracone [Mel, Raydel, Honey, Dahlia, Ephil, Alither]

Altair & Nimue

I've got more OCs but there's some I hardly post about sooo

Now that you know me a bit more, you can keep navigating on my blog or go spend your time somewhere else, do whatever you want.

[firelxdykatara]

Hi, heavensweetheart in an ask mentioned you’ve written meta on adults writing about teen sex and told me I should ask you about it. I was wondering if you could give your thoughts on this in the context of ATLA, in fanfic and the Suki and Sokka tent scene. Some teens are having a meltdown over that scene saying it’s immoral for 16 y/o to have sex and imply that and I’m so confused. When did teens suddenly become allergic to sex? It wasn’t like that when I was one not long ago?

I’ll probably have follow up questions, but I’ll save those for now. Unless you say you don’t wanna talk on that anymore, which I totally respect. I’m just so confused as to why teens now are rioting against the Sokka and Suki scene, and even the *slight* implication that Zuko and Mai had sex too. They sound like church moms rather than teens and that’s jarring shift in culture in just a few years

I COMPLETELY understand teens wanting to avoid sex and stuff in their own lives or the media they choose to consume on personal levels but don’t know why they’re waging war against it

they’re complaining about that scene now too???? idk why i’m so surprised, considering everything else i’ve seen ppl getting up in arms about in the fandom it was only a matter of time, but jfc

listen, here’s an inconvenient factoid that fans--adult and minor alike--need to bear in mind before they go off half-cocked: underage teens have sex. it’s not like there’s some magical switch that gets flipped the instant someone turns 18 that unlocks their Raging Hormones where before they were Completely Sexless Beings. that’s not how it works. (i’m not bringing asexuality into this because ace ppl can have sex and even decent sex drives, libido and sexuality are not the same thing, and sexual awakenings can happen at just about any age post-puberty.) furthermore, coming-of-age tales (which often involve blossoming sexuality, as that is frequently a part of such narratives) are always going to be published and written by adults.

adults are, by and large, the ones with the resources and time to create finished and polished pieces of fiction and pitch them and get them into publishing houses and sold. teenagers who manage this are the exception to the rule, and the only one i can think of off the top of my head (christopher paolini, who started writing eragon when he was fifteen) was still an adult (at 19) by the time he actually managed to get published. adults are also, sorry to say, going to have a better understanding and perspective on what it was like to be a teenager--because they not only lived through it, but they have distance and a better ability to look at it objectively than someone still in the throes of massive hormonal changes and struggling through high school.

this doesn’t always work to our advantage--’adults forgot what it was like to be kids’ is a major theme in a lot of media for a reason--and sometimes it’s depressingly obvious just when any given author actually experienced being a teenager, because regardless of the setting their characters and plot points and tropes are incredibly dated--but it does typically mean that when an adult author is writing about teenagers having sex, or experiencing a sexual awakening, having a first love and everything that comes with that as a teenager, they aren’t acting like some voyeur watching teens gettin’ it on from the outside, but rather drawing on their own lived and remembered experiences and using those to inform their writing. (or experiences they wish they could have hand, like many queer authors who weren’t able to safely come out as teens and so get to experience being a kid and being able to be queer through their own writing in a way that was denied them in their own lives.)

i’ve done ‘first kiss’ and ‘first time’ type stories, now, as i am, as an adult, and i was never thinking about it as some outside observer perving on teenage characters--i was remembering what it was like when i was that age, and channeling that into my writing. no one is obligated to read or enjoy the things i write, of course, but trying to tell me that i’m not allowed to write about the things i felt as a teenager, just because i’m an adult now? that’s a quick way to get told in no uncertain terms to fuck off.

now, that being said, it’s absolutely flat ridiculous to me that people are complaining about the idea that suki and sokka were having sex, when they were child soldiers in a goddamn war. why is it more acceptable that they were preparing to fight and possibly die in a fierce battle, but gods fucking forbid they be implied to have a sexual relationship with each other before-hand? why is it more acceptable that children fight and die and kill (and yes, the gaang had a bodycount to their names, even aang), but the idea that mid- and older teens having sex is so taboo? nothing was even shown! it was all but spelled out, but in that scene we didn’t even see them kiss, it just immediately cut away after sokka called suki back to his tent!

what this tells me is that people are having a meltdown over the mere suggestion that these fifteen and sixteen-year-olds were sexually active, and considering that by the time i graduated high school (over a decade ago) i knew five girls personally who’d gotten pregnant and either dropped out or been homeschooled for a few months to have their kids before coming back to finish out their classes, i’m having trouble with this idea that even thinking of the fact that teenagers have sex should be so virulently anathema.

teens have sex with each other. sometimes teens get pregnant. sometimes these things find their way into YA fiction, and that is a genre that is almost 100% written by adults. (i’m sure some started writing as teens and maybe even got their early fiction reworked and polished, but the vast vast majority are at least adults, if not totally out of their teens, by the time they are officially published.) sometimes these things find their way even into narratives aimed at a younger audience, because there are always going to be elements that children won’t understand but the adults watching will get a kick out of--think of all the jokes in Shrek that you didn’t understand if you saw it for the first time as a kid, which seem even more hilarious once you’re an adult and have context for them.

no seven-year-old kid is gonna look at the scene of zuko walking in on sokka and the latter inhaling a rose he was holding between his lips as he waited for suki and think ‘OMG HE WAS EXPECTING HIS GIRLFRIEND AND THEY WERE GONNA HAVE SEX’--not unless something else was going on in that household, and at that point its not the show’s fault by any metric. but adults or even older teens are probably gonna get a chuckle, understanding the wink and the nudge that younger kids won’t get cause they don’t have context for that kind of romantic/sexual coding. and that’s ok!!!! the fact that people won’t get it unless they already have context for that sort of behavior is exactly why it works as a subtle joke!

and, again, the fact that a kid was killed on-screen and the fact that the main characters are all effectively child soldiers in a war, and these are somehow not topics that are too mature for the audience at which the show is aimed, but implications (which the target audience won’t understand, but older people who enjoy the show will) that teenagers are having sex is somehow beyond the pale???? (sure sokka might die tomorrow, but at least he wasn’t having -gasp- SEX before he did!!!!! that’s how they sound and it’s fucking ridiculous)

i genuinely do not understand that attitude, and i don’t think i ever will.

[jcmorrigan]

Do you support anti-harassment and pro-shipping?

Short answer: Yes.

Long answer: This is an issue I’ve been monitoring and grappling with for a long time, and I feel like while my core philosophy has been the same for a while now, the nuances I’ve held shift every so often. I don’t identify as an anti. I just don’t. I think shipping things - be it incest, adult/minor, or one of the many flavors of abusive - is an ENTIRELY separate issue from wanting to do that IRL. I think sometimes people just want to write taboo topics for various reasons. Because the topics themselves are taboo and that’s interesting, because they offer methods of coping, even because some people are kinda into projecting upon the person on the losing end of the power dynamic and being dominated and kicked around, since that’s not something you should really chase in real life (unless it’s during a roleplay with a network of safewords).

There are many ships I think are gross, but I don’t want people to stop shipping them because I don’t like them. I don’t like ships that involve anyone under 13 with anyone over 18. I don’t like ships that involve anyone under 18 with anyone over 30. (Aging up is a whole different matter; if you write the younger character older and legitimately have them behave the way you think they would as an adult, it’s all good.) I REALLY don’t like ships where a character is either confirmed homosexual or only shown onscreen to be attracted to the same gender in a big-deal reveal sort of way (if the character has crushes on many genders or the creator uses Word of God to say they’re bi/pan, it’s fine) and the ship involves putting them with someone of the opposite gender (shipping them with enbies is fine). And no, I don’t think it’s a double standard that I sometimes like to do same-sex ships for characters who are coded very very straight. But this is all to do with my tastes and beliefs, not with what I think the rest of you all should do. If you like something that falls in my personal no-no category, then go ahead and do it. I’ll decide how much I want to interact with you, and that says more about our potential chemistry as a unit than it does about you as a person. And if you have boundaries yourself - if age-gap ships skeeve you out - then that doesn’t make you a bad person or even an anti! Just block as needed, talk to friends if you feel betrayed by them, and recognize what it is you don’t like and that you don’t have to like it.

Selfshipping? Do what you want. Again, I might personally have reservations about shipping with somebody too young (I actually perceived my own main f/o as in his twenties when I first watched his source, then saw Word of God say he was NINETEEN actually, even though that invalidates many many jokes about how he’s bad at adulting, so I just said “fuck it” and he’s at least 24 to me because that makes more sense and is more of my comfort zone). But what I like shouldn’t dictate what YOU do. I might give you a little side-eye if you’re shipping with somebody young, but I don’t know your reasons for doing so and I don’t have the right to judge. I might distance myself from certain situations if I’m feeling skeeved out. Or I might not feel skeeved out depending on how it’s handled. I also again would raise a brow if you’re selfshipping with an opposite-gender gay character, but same principle: you have your reasons, you shouldn’t stop because some rando (me) has an issue with your ship, and if I have a problem with how you handle it, I’ll just peace out on my end and not make a deal out of it.

A lot of this comes from the fact that I have mega OCD and I already try to moralize everything I do and hyper-analyze my choices to make sure I am being a Good Person. If I try to follow the “rules” to make my ships palatable to everyone, then I start worrying that any deviation makes me unforgivable. The vast majority of ships in my deck are squeaky-clean and have no problems, but sometimes I’ll get, like...Ventus/Papyrus, where Ven is 15, and Papyrus is in age limbo but I always thought he was at least 18, and then I don’t want to spiral into a moral crisis because I really think it would be cute to put the anime boy with the skeleton and I think they’re both asexual anyway. Or when I aged up Zevon from Descendants in order to make him make more sense as Yzma’s son, and then I had to give him a ship with an adult and I found one I really like (Kamdor from Power Rangers). And this is not even scratching the very complex issue of “The writers of this piece of fiction were ACTUALLY horny for incest and I can see the subtext for it and now I gotta figure out what to do with this mess because I like the series and I do want the characters to have partners who will treat them right.”

That said...up until recently, I looked up to the more extreme proship community, even so far as to kinda be more of an “anti-anti.” But as time went on, that...didn’t seem to fit. I’ve unfollowed a few of those blogs now because first of all, proshipping as a “political party” seems to come with some things I don’t believe in, such as forming a parasocial relationship with AO3 or saying that freedom of fans to ship what they want means the creators of mainstream media should be allowed to portray whatever they want and that being “critical of media you consume” is an automatic dogwhistle for bullies. More importantly: I have at least one friend who I know leans more anti, and I value her a lot and I think it’s valid for her to have her boundaries. After a while, the things that anti-antis did to protect themselves from bullying started to feel a little bit like bullying right back. I can’t really call myself a traditional proshipper anymore, even though I’m definitely not an anti. But I don’t want to be an “anti-anti” either. Because actually, I USED to be an anti on a different social media platform long before Tumblr, and though I can’t tell you exactly why I was that way, I can understand what it’s like to feel that strongly about things that gross you out and want to get them out of your face. I don’t want to say I’m against a whole bunch of people who are probably as varied in intensity as proshippers are.

At the end of the day, what I want is for us all to CHILL OUT. Can we please, PLEASE just focus on having fun in whatever way that comes - problematic ships or no - so long as people IRL aren’t getting hurt? Can we respect that there are probably a LOT of people with OCD on social media who spiral easily if shamed too much (which is probably how the anti movement rose in the first place - I’m sure my anti phase was fueled by my secular scrupulosity)? Can we not assume that people who ship weird age gaps are Actual Pedophiles, which is an entirely separate issue? (Listen...I grew up in the Age of AkuRoku. I hated AkuRoku. But if all the AkuRoku shippers turned out to be pedos, well, the news sure didn’t cover it. I’m saying the majority of them didn’t. And it’s been a decade.) Can we not spread the fear of being cancelled or that having a certain fictional preference will ruin a budding friendship? Can we communicate with one another in private if a friend says or does something that makes you uncomfortable, such as shipping something that makes you question their moral stance? Can actual legitimate creators of media not take sides in the goddamn pro/anti war, thereby making groups of their fans feel alienated from being welcomed by the source? Can we just have fun PLEASE?

Also, just...stop fighting about Reylo. That’s the dumbest thing to fight over and we managed to somehow get the actual SW crew in on that dumbass fight. Some people like Reylo and some people hate Reylo and THAT’S IT. WE’RE DONE HERE.

It sure says something that I worry, before hitting the Post button, that this might ruin some of the relationships I have or inspire a mass exodus of the followers whose names I come to like seeing in my notifications. But it’s ultimately better for all of us if I’m honest.

[konstantya]

Frankenstein’s Meme - Day 12, 13, & 14

(Full list of questions at the bottom, under the cut.  Previous answers can be found here.)

12.  A ship you have never liked and probably never will.

Idk, most of them?  I don’t really dislike ships, so much as I’m just profoundly indifferent to them.  Like, even the very few ships I might say I dislike, I’m still like, “Eh, under the right circumstances and with the right author... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯”

13.  Do you prefer art, fic, or vids?  Why?  Bonus:  If someone was to give you a fandom gift, what format would it be?

Usually art or fics.  (Maybe a slight preference for fics, because they can explore things more fully?  But then art is easier and quicker to consume, and my time is unfortunately limited these days, so...)

As far as gifts go, I’d be thrilled with anything, but if I had to choose, I guess I’d lean toward art.  Usually I gravitate toward rarepairs and minor characters, and while I can (and have) written stories to fill the fanfic void, I don’t really have the drawing skills to fill the fanart void, heh.

14.  A pairing – platonic, romantic or sexual – that you initially didn’t consider, but someone changed your mind.

MERLANDAU, AKA: Merle and Dilandau from Escaflowne, and @pethics is to blame!

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(Originally posted by trobadora, on DW.)

1. What’s changed about your fandom life in the last 365 days? 2. Your newest fandom. 3. You’ve got your OTP, you have to throw a third into the mix (from the same fandom), creating an OT3. Who is the OTP, and in your opinion, why would they make a perfect third for them? 4. What are the origins of your penname/username? 5. What’s a fandom that you wish had a bigger following? 6. What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom? What fandom was it? Not necessarily your oldest fandom, but a fandom that you started and still continue to read/write/create content for in some way. 7. What would make you leave a fandom, or prevent you from getting into it in the first place? 8. Squicks - What are some things that squick you in fandom - not necessarily “icky”, though it can be. From anything involving blood, to bad grammar. 9. What’s the hardest thing about writing, and why are titles the Worst™? 10. Do you have a fandom that you follow - either regularly or casually - with little to no knowledge of canon? 11. Ships that you currently like a lot. (They don’t have to be OTPs because not everyone has OTPs.) Friendships, pairings, threesomes, etc. are allowed. 12. A ship you have never liked and probably never will. 13. Do you prefer art, fic, or vids? Why? Bonus: If someone was to give you a fandom gift, what format would it be? 14. A pairing – platonic, romantic or sexual – that you initially didn’t consider, but someone changed your mind. 15. What was the first thing you ever contributed to a fandom? 16. Do you remember your first OTP? Who was in it? 17. What is your favourite source text for fandom stuff (e.g., TV shows, movies, books, anime, Western animation, etc.)? 18. How many fandoms have you written for? How many have you been in, and how many are you still in? 19. Has social media caused you to stop liking any fandoms, if so, which and why? 20. What fandom broke your heart? 21. Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your faves. (Characters you’re neutral about are fair game, as are characters you dislike or even loathe.) 22. Name a character that you’d like to have for a friend. 23. Your rarest fandoms. 24. A fandom you’ve abandoned and why. 25. Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending? 26. A trope which you are virtually certain to love in any fandom. 27. A trope which you are virtually certain to hate in any fandom. 28. How did you first get into fanfic, and what was the first fandom you wrote fic for? 29. Have you ever tried to write for a fandom or ship, and found you couldn’t? 30. Name three things you wish you saw more of in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).

[antagonistchan]

really long post sorry lol but i have so many thoughts about this that i so desperately need to get out

Something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately: Cheating in Transformers.

For some backstory; I’ve vaguely known about Transformers as long as I can remember (I had a bunch of Armada minicons as a little kid, and my Dad liked G1 when he was a kid and told me about it a couple times (and eventually I inherited his old toys)). And then I really got into Transformers myself in 2006 when I was 8 years old, when I started watching Transformers: Cybertron (which was already over halfway done at that point, oops, but still). And then I got REALLY into Transformers myself in 2008, when I truly discovered the Transformers fandom (I discovered tfwiki, and I discovered a couple Transformers youtubers who I actually still follow today, and I realized that I wanted to start collecting Transformers...); ever since then, I’ve been a hardcore Transformers fan. Transformers has consistently been at least one of my biggest fandoms this whole time. And most of the time it’s my absolute biggest, I’ve just had a couple phases here and there of thinking “maybe I care about this other thing just as much as if not more than Transformers” (most notably during my Vocaloid phase from 2015-2018). My favorite video game of all time is the Mass Effect trilogy, and a couple weeks ago I was thinking “there’s probably nothing that could ever top Mass Effect as my all-time favorite game” and then a week later I realized “Actually, no, there’s one thing that could potentially push Mass Effect aside, and that would be my dream Transformers game”.

So, I'm currently 23, I got into Transformers when I was 8, and I’ve been a hardcore fan since I was ten. More than half of my life. Way more than half of my conscious life since the first few years don’t really count.

So, with that context in mind, returning to the point of this post: Cheating.

I don’t like it when Transformers cheat. The robot mode and the altmode are extremely important to me, but ultimately, the most important part of a Transformer is the transformation between the two itself. And when it’s cheating, I feel a little... well, cheated.

Point 1: Bayverse. When I first saw the Bayverse designs, I was immediately put off because I knew that those designs couldn’t translate into toys without cheating. The only toys that even remotely approach movie-accurate transformations are Masterpieces and old Leader-class toys, and even then it’s not fully there. So like, the Bayverse designs feel like they’re missing the point of Transformers. And remember, I was a kid back then. I’m not saying I was a super mature kid or anything; rather, I was put off because of my childlike priorities. I wanted a toy that didn’t lie to me.

The Bumblebee-style designs are a step in the right direction; the characters are all actually recognizable as themselves now. But the whole design philosophy is still wildly out of scale with what’s actually possible in a toy. And god, as I get older, the more and more I do actually understand the appeal of the Bayverse design philosophy. It is a really cool and creative and interesting design philosophy. But it’s a good design philosophy for a movie, NOT for a toy. So even though I actually appreciate the Bayverse style now, it still stings that it doesn’t really understand toys, and the only Bayverse-style toys I’d ever be willing to buy are the insanely expensive ones.

(Also, it’ll always sting at least re: non-Bumblebee designs that the most high-profile part of the brand for so long was one of the least representative, and was so radically different from everything else. To a lot of people, Bayverse is Transformers. If those people are hardcore fans... I don’t mind too much that Bayverse defined Transformers for them. I can’t fully relate, but I do relate a little (these movies have been around and huge for more than half of my life, I definitely have some nostalgia for them), and they clearly have a lot of love for it and that largely placates me. But the fact that Bayverse also defined Transformers to a lot of casual consumers- THAT makes me wildly uncomfortable)

I had a similar initial reaction to Animated’s designs, but then Animated’s designs actually won me over because the designers used some sort of blood magic to make the toys actually work. The toys actually transform the way they do in the show! Incredible! And even at reasonable prices, and looking good in both modes (at worst, there’s some minor kibble and visible robot bits)! They actually did understand the point of Transformers, and I feel ashamed for having ever doubted them! Animated is actually one of the highest points of Transformers, both in media and in the toys! God, I love Animated!

Point 2: Speaking of Animated, we gotta talk about Wreck-Gar.

And by “We gotta talk about Wreck-Gar”, I mean “Wreck-Gar is actually perfectly fine and everyone’s way too harsh on him”. Animated Wreck-Gar is one of the most infamous backpack-formers, and backpack-forming is one of the most infamous methods of cheating.... but honestly, with Wreck-Gar, it doesn’t feel like cheating at all.

Yeah, he’s got most of a dump truck hanging off his back... but it feels like that’s the point. A dump truck is already just a cargo delivery system, so with Wreck-Gar, it just feels like the robot is still just a cargo delivery system. He doesn’t have a backpack because he’s poorly-designed, he has a backpack because he has a backpack.

That’s not to say the backpack-forming doesn’t have any issues. It does still create two problems- that is, it restricts his waist articulation and gives him balance issues. Those are both unfortunate. But it’s not cheating.

Kibble doesn’t feel like cheating if it feels like it’s supposed to be there.

Point 3: Fake kibble.

CHUG toys like to cheat a lot, especially lately.

For instance, PotP Punch/Counterpunch. Counterpunch’s chest is not the actual windows; the real windows are in his feet and slot over Counterpunch’s chest.

This is... kinda clever. It’s still cheating, but the fake thing is just hidden inside the real one, so everything’s kinda in the same place.

But again, it is still cheating, and I feel like cheating misses the point for me.

In this case, they’re clearly cheating because it makes the two modes look better. And they’re right. If the altmode used Counterpunch’s real chest, it’d be too small; and if Counterpunch used the altmode’s real windows, it’d be too big. I get it. But I just don’t think that’s worth the cheating.

But much like actual kibble, sometimes fake kibble doesn’t feel like cheating.

Optimus Prime has had many many toys with fake cheating over the years, because they’ve experimented with so many ways for him to transform but like to keep his design mostly intact (hell, that’s part of why they’ve experimented so much- Floro Dery’s take on his design is really hard to replicate in a toy). And they have varying levels of “does this feel like cheating”.

Classics Voyager Optimus Prime is cool, but his fake kibble is absolutely cheating.

Powermaster Prime doesn’t feel like cheating at all to me. Part of that is because in the Masterforce anime (which I saw before I’d even seen the toy), they don’t hide how he actually transforms in the slightest. They show him transforming, and he transforms like the toy. There, it feels like they just wanted him to transform different, but wanted to keep the iconic details, rather than making him transform different for the sake of the iconic details.

Earthrise Optimus Prime’s fake kibble is mostly cheating, but the way it cheats is actually so interesting that, if I force myself to think of it the way I think of Powermaster Prime- pretend that it admits it transforms funny- I can actually accept it as somewhat not cheating.

But there’s one Optimus Prime that doesn’t use fake kibble at all and still ends up with a Floro Dery-accurate robot mode. I really love the way this Optimus Prime transforms.

It just fucking sucks that this Optimus Prime’s vehicle mode is so bad that even I- who prioritizes the transformation above the vehicle mode- am willing to say “Wow, this toy is garbage”.

I’m speaking of Classics Deluxe Optimus Prime. The robot mode isn’t as good as Earthrise’s, but it was good at the time, and god, that transformation is absolutely beautiful. But jesus, that vehicle mode is ugly as shit. I really wish they’d give Classics Deluxe’s general design another go, have an Optimus that transforms just about the same way but doesn’t have the worst fucking vehicle mode of all time.

Point 4: Partsforming.

I don’t usually like partsforming. I have a hard time accepting Earthrise Cliffjumper even though it’s mostly very good because the partsforming is so much.

But sometimes- and I think you might be noticing a pattern after the kibble and fake kibble bits- partsforming doesn’t feel like cheating for me.

Partsforming typically feels right when it actually gets so egregious that it loops back around to being Really Good, Actually.

For instance, RiD01 Ultra Magnus. His entire vehicle mode basically splits in half, and one half becomes his legs while the other half becomes everything else. The fact that he has to split in half so dramatically and then recombine equally dramatically makes it feel like an inventive and unique transformation instead of a cheat.

[vincent-g-writer]

The Silver Screen Savant, pt 2- the Meh, the Bad and The yikes.

Hello Writers!

Last time here on Starry Starry Write, I talked a little about Autism in the media and my personal experiences therein. Today, I’d like to go a little broader, and tackle the topic from a macro perspective.

In recent times, you’ve probably heard “Representation Matters” oft repeated. Especially in prominent talking spaces like social media. But what does that mean, exactly?

Why “Representation Matters,” and how.

The short answer:

Diverse representation in media tells us that everyone has a place in the world. That everyone’s story matters.

The long answer:

It’s no secret that we begin engaging with media at a young age. When I was growing up in the 90’s and 00’s, TV and video games were often the babysitters of my peers. I was one of the few kids in my neighborhood whose parents weren’t divorced. The kids I knew? Not so much. Most of them were raised by single parents, grandparents and of course-the boob tube. I personally prefered books, when my mom wasn’t yelling “it’s too nice out to be holed up in that dark bedroom!”

Now, don’t mistake my preference for some kind of intellectual superiority. I watched plenty of TV too. Besides, books aren’t magically out of the equation. Printed material is our oldest form of media. And- often just as problematic. Though I will say- I saw a much broader range of people on covers adoring library shelves than I ever did titles on a TV roster. But, I digress. The point is: for many of us, consuming media begins at an early time of our life. And that’s where the problem starts. Even in my childhood, where The Magic School Bus, Hey Arnold, and Sesame Street showed people of all kinds, I can point to many that did not. Especially not people like me. Which did me a grave disservice. I didn’t know I was on the spectrum for a long time, and when I finally found out, I was horrified, thanks to what I had seen on TV.

Because media is not only a wonderful way to learn about people that don’t look, act or sound like us. It also informs our ideas of who we are, and what we can be. Whether we like it or not: it shapes how we understand the world. And it doesn’t stop with Childhood.

Time Changes Much, but not all.

Things are better now. Well, a little bit, anyway.

As an adult, I see more people like me on the screen nowadays. Which is nice.

Ish.

Why “ish?” Well…

Frequently, these “noticeably different” characters (read: Autistically coded) are branded “NOT AUTISTIC!” You heard it here first, folks! That one character (insert your favorite) is Totally Not Autistic. Despite being written in a way that gives every indication otherwise.

*Facepalm*

Now for some examples, which we’ll call the “Meh,” “The Bad” and the “Yikes.” For “fun,” we’ll also go into the off-air perceptions of the characters.

The “Meh.”

First on the list is Dr. Spencer Reid, from CBS’s “Criminal Minds.”

Dr. Reid is the youngest member of the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit, having joined at the age of 22. He holds three B.A degrees in Sociology, Psychology and Philosophy, as well as three Ph.D’s in Engineering, Chemistry, and Mathematics.

He also has the social skills of a limp dishrag. Wait, what’s that? High Intelligence + Low Social Awareness? Hmmm…Then there’s his restrictive behavioral patterns, obsessive interests, and general “quirkiness!” that we could talk about. But let’s hear a quote from the actor who plays him, Matthew Gray Gubler:

“..an eccentric genius, with hints of schizophrenia and minor autism, Asperger’s Syndrome. Reid is 24, 25 years old with three PH.D.s and one can’t usually achieve that without some form of autism.”

Hoooo-boy. I could go into all the things wrong with this, including why the term “Asperger’s” is both horrific (TW: Eugenics,Ableism, N*zis) and harmful. However, today we’ll simply leave it with the fact that this term is no longer applicable, having been reclassified in 2013 as part of Autism Spectrum disorder.

The “Bad.”

Next up, we have Will Graham, from NBC’s Hannibal.

Like our first example, Will works for the FBI. He’s a gifted criminal profiler with “special” abilities, namely hyper empathy, which allows him to reconstruct the actions and fantasies of the killers he hunts. He’s intellectually gifted, hates eye contact, socializing, and prefers to spend…most of his time…alone.

Oh dear. Haven’t we been here before? But, I mean, he doesn’t have Autism! The show runner says so!

For Will Graham, there’s a line in the pilot about him being on the spectrum of autism or Asperger’s, and he’s neither of those things. He actually has an empathy disorder where he feels way too much and that’s relatable in some way. There’s something about people who connect more to animals than they do to other people because it’s too intense for whatever reason.

You can’t see me right now, but I’m cringing. A lot. This is just…ugh. I mean, for starters, I know a handful of autistic people who struggle with hyper empathy, which can make social situations overwhelming and hard to navigate. In fact, I happen to be one of them. Plus, there’s a cool little thing about how, frequently, people on the spectrum more readily identify with animals. But, y’know. Who am I to say? I’m just someone, one of many, who’s dealt with this my whole life.

Now, onto the “Yikes.”

*sigh*

And finally, we have BBC’s Sherlock, a modern adaptation of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s renowned “consulting” detective, and probably the most famous fictional character of all time.

Now, I’ll start by saying that the BBC incarnation is not the first to be Spectrum labeled. In fact, Sherlock was my childhood hero, and the first “person” I saw referred to this way. My aunt, an avid reader herself, casually remarked to a friend “I’ve always wondered if Holmes is Autistic,” after I came yammering on about how fantastic the books were. Had I not been champing at the bit to get back to my reading, I might have asked her what that meant.

I also believe this fandom driven speculation is why many detective type characters (see above) are often coded as Autistic, intentionally or otherwise.

In this New York Times article, Lisa Sanders, M.D. describes Holmes traits:

He appears oblivious to the rhythms and courtesies of normal social intercourse — he doesn’t converse so much as lecture. His interests and knowledge are deep but narrow. He is strangely “coldblooded,” and perhaps as a consequence, he is also alone in the world.

Now, before we go any father, let me take a moment to defend his creator. During the time Sir Arthur Conan Doyle first created his most famous work, Autism was not known. That isn’t to say it didn’t exist. We’ve always existed. In fact, it’s now believed that the Changeling Myth, a common European folk story, was a way to explain Autism. In one telling (there are a few) children displaying “intelligence beyond their years” and “uncanny knowledge” were imposters, traded out by Fae creatures for offspring of their own. Children believed to be “Changlings,” regretfully, often came to a bad end. A chilling reminder that the stories we tell impact our real lives.

So while Autism was at least somewhat recognized, it did not become its own official diagnosis until 1943.

Meanwhile, Sherlock Holmes was first published in 1892. Now, as a writer who often draws from my personal reality, I imagine Doyle probably “wrote what he knew,” which is to say, acquainted with one or more Autistic people, he used them as inspiration.

On the other hand…

BBC’s Sherlock first aired in 2010. And while one might argue that the writers simply capitalized on the Autistic fan-theory, or took already available traits and exaggerated them for their version… they left a lot to be desired. Autism aside, this new Sherlock is…well…an asshole. Narcissistic, abusive and egocentric (to name a few) he sweeps his caustic behavior under the rug of “high functioning sociopath,” and blytly ignores the consequences.

Which is a major problem. Because while doing this, he’s still “obviously” (at least in the Hollywood sense) Autistic. In my previous post, where I said some characters are “too smart™, and logical© to ever have feelings, friends or empathy,” this is what I meant.

This is bad. We’re looping right back to Representation Matters. Bad representation, and the navigating of such, is just as important for writers to think about as good representation. Maybe even moreso. Because bad representation paints real people into cardboard, stereotyped people-shaped things. It otherizes. And it’s harmful. You would not believe the people I’ve met assume I’m not Autistic because I’m not an egotistical jerk. Why? Because they watched, you guessed it, BBC Sherlock.

Confession time:

Now here’s my little secret:

I love all of these characters. They are some of my favorite on tv. Why? Because for good or ill, I recognize myself in them. Finally, I can turn on the TV, and see myself. Or, somewhat, anyway.

My favorite character out of this list? Loath though I am to admit it… Is Sherlock. See, what those well meaning folks didn’t know (the ones who say I’m I’m “too nice,” to be Autistic) is… well, if we’re being honest, I wasn’t always nice. A few years ago, I was that guy. I was a jerk because I thought I was the smartest person in the room. Which is really not a good look. In fact, sitting down and watching the first season of sherlock, (around three or four years after it came out) made me realize how much of a jerk I actually was.

There are other things there too. Things that tie me to all these characters, that I didn’t list. But that’s for another today.

For now, I’d like to add a caveat or two:

1) I’ve watched all the shows listed above, and adore them. As I mentioned, Sherlock is my favorite. He’s also the one I’ve watched the most (Repeatedly, in fact. Whoops.) and I recognize it’s not all bad. In the end, he learned to treat people better (somewhat) and certainly became more human over time. And, there are other deeply problematic elements of the show I’d like to tackle, eventually.

*cough* Queerbating! *cough*

2) I’m well aware that the above cases are all thin, white, able bodied, “straight” males. But I chose these characters for a couple of reasons. One, they’re the most prominent type on TV. Again, we loop back around to representation, and why we need more positive, diverse examples of it.

And finally-

3) In my last post, I mentioned I’d give some “good” instances of Hollywood Autism trope. But I didn’t exactly do that. Partially, because half way through, I thought…perhaps…I’m not the best to judge what might be a good Autistic character. I mean, I’m sure someone will read this and think my current aforementioned characters are fine. Heck! They might even argue my perception here, and say the characters are just fine. I accept that. In my life, both on and off the page, I recognize that I cannot, should not (and don’t want to) speak for an entire community.

Because of this, I cannot tell you how to write a “good” Autistic character, or what media is “acceptable.” I can’t even really tell you what a bad character is. Sure, I have a lot of opinions about it. But- if you’re on the spectrum and like and identify with the above? That’s fine. I mean, even with all the problems I noted (and some I didn’t) I certainly do.

On the other hand, if you’re a writer, and you want to write a character from this (or any, for that matter) community you aren’t part of, I caution you.

Do your research. Preferably from multiple credible sources.

Talk to people on the spectrum about what it’s really like. (Though try to steer clear of asking for emotional labor.You could, say, hop on reddit and ask the community there, for instance, which is a no pressure way to obtain potentially decent info.)

Finally, whatever you do, remember this-

Autistic people can look like anyone. We can act, and think and be different, like anyone. We are real, living, breathing people. Not robots, not sob stories, not tropes. People. So if you write about us, write us like people. And your work will be all the better for it.

-Your Loving Vincent

[kiarcheo]

     Golden Crown and the Pink Menace   

Catherine had known, intellectually, that her nemesis was a teenager, but it didn’t really sink in until the day their school called because her number was the only one on their emergency contact list.

Once again it’s almost 3500 words, so it’s easier, you can read it on ao3

A/N: I wrote this months ago and then forgot about it. I had some notes and plans to write more, but I don't think it's gonna happen anymore. I felt bad just leaving it in my folder forever so I decided to post it anyway. Hope you like it.

Heavily inspired by bethanythemartian's interpretation of this writing prompt

Catherine had known that she was young. Her so-called nemesis. Maybe it was some of her most athletic feats while escaping. How she was more active during holidays periods. The recklessness, which reminded her of her past nemesis, Green Phantom, and a time where Catherine had been younger too.

Now. That had been a true nemesis. Green Phantom had seemed to have two cornerstones in their villain career: environmental causes (hence the green part of the name) and antagonising Catherine’s heroic alter-ego. From making her look like a fool every time she failed to catch them (Catherine and everyone else, to her defence, hence the Phantom part) to leaving cheeky messages on the crime scenes, Green Phantom had been a pain in her ass up until the moment they suddenly disappeared.

Pink Menace was quite different. Catherine had not even realised there was a new player in the game, to be honest. Until some corporate bigwig had gone on a rant on live television questioning why the supposed protector of the city wasn’t doing anything to stop ‘this pink menace’. Next day everyone and their cousin was talking about the recent spree of attacks to very different types of businesses, the only common link being the perpetrator, who always seemed to wear some pink in her attire. And Catherine says ‘her’ because they have met and fought multiple times and she recognises a girl when she sees one, even in mask and costume, and not because of some kind of gender-stereotyping colours crap. Not that they were particularly good either. Good enough to hide her identity? Sure. But nothing more. She supposes that villains don’t really get sponsorships for that kind of thing.

So yes. Next day everyone was talking about Pink Menace and why Golden Crown wasn’t stopping her. Catherine isn’t sure what it is with monikers and colours. Not the name she would have chosen for herself but in their business you either proclaim your chosen name first or you’ll get stuck with whatever the media and the public decide to call you. And it seemed like both her and her nemesis made the same mistake. To be fair, Catherine knows she could have gotten something much worse, and a golden crown made a good symbol for merchandise at the very least. She was happy she hadn’t gotten stuck with some kind of animal, or worse, insect. Also she knows how to pick her battles, she made a career – a real life, no masks involved one – out of it. So she agreed with the sponsors. Yeah. It’s not a free for all, those things are regulated, you know? Not everyone can be a hero™. But some accountability in exchange for insurance (you never know when you’ll end up destroying something), financial support and protection of her anonymity seemed fair. Naturally she made sure that anything she signed was absolutely watertight.

Anyway. Back to the point. Pink Menace was obviously young. But Catherine thought she was college age at the very least. Maybe recently moved away from home. Surely her parents would have realised she was out all night doing crimes. Well, maybe not the crime part, but they would have known their child was staying out all night, right? Also, as mentioned before, more activity during holidays pointed towards her being a student.

So Catherine took it easy on her. Pulled her blows most of the time. Not to say that Pink Menace wasn’t good, she definitely could put up a fight. Catherine had more experience, but in a full-out fight? She wouldn’t be overly confident about winning. But they never came down to that.

So maybe Catherine let her go away easily, hesitated just that fraction of a second before making the jump, stopped to make sure that everyone else was fine (they always were) before continuing the pursuit and by then, Pink Menace had disappeared. And if she caught a flash of pink hair around the corner or up the fire exit stairs…nobody would know (but she kept thinking that she should really tell her to secure her hair better, because that’s a sure way to get identified and caught).

And if she was a bit laxer when Pink Menace’s target was one of Henry Tudor’s properties? Well, that just happened. Surely it wouldn’t hurt too much a man who called himself ‘the King’ (with the public going along with it). And it’s not like Golden Crown has personal matters to settle with him…now, Catherine might be a different story, but thank God for secret identities.

Of course, she couldn’t just let things go all the time. Accountability, like she said. Catherine thinks Pink Menace knows that too. So sometimes she’d escape abandoning her haul as if Golden Crown had stopped her. Catherine has her suspicions that they are mostly useless things and Pink Menace still kept whatever she actually broke into the buildings for. But she has no way to prove it nor any wish to do so. And Henry never publicly complained about it. Which on one side raised alarm bells, along with the fact that she has seen Pink Menace getting away with things that had not been included in the official report (perks of her real-life job). Why not admit that something had been stolen unless you shouldn’t have had it in the first place? On the other side, it was good for her because it left her good reputation intact…which is everything in the hero-ing business.  

Also it’s not like Pink Menace was actually evil. Catherine would have classified her as a criminal rather than a villain. She always tried not to hurt people. Didn’t seem to have any grand plan besides robbing or destroying properties, mostly owned by Henry (or connected to him, she’d discover later). Media and public painted it as a rivalry, hailed Pink Menace as Golden Crown’s new nemesis after Green Phantom’s disappearance. And they got along with it. It was publicity and publicity brings money. For Golden Crown at least. It only made things harder for Pink Menace, but it’s not like they ask for the villain’s opinions in these cases. Still they had an unspoken agreement that it was for show. They both pulled their blows. Went easy on the other.

But, again, that’s not the point. The point is that Pink Menace was a villainess and Golden Crown’s nemesis. According to the press it was an all-consuming rivalry. In real life, Catherine didn’t exactly spend a lot of time thinking about it. She had a busy life. A busy double life. Superheroing doesn’t make you the big bucks. And while her real-life job gave her flexibility and freedom and, yes, money, it also gave her loads of responsibilities. In short, she got stuff going on.

So you can imagine the surprise when she got a call from a school. Saying that her ‘child’ had been taken to the hospital, nothing life-threatening, but needed to be picked up. The name they used was one of her identities. Yes, she has more than ones. Some more legal than others. She had her name changed…legally. She has a couple of identities associated with heroing…wouldn’t call them exactly legal, but they are sanctioned. But the one they called? Not connected to Golden Crown at all. She hasn’t used it in ages and she had almost forgot that she had even made it (that’s not to say that it wouldn’t stand up to scrutiny…she is nothing but careful and meticulous in what she does, always had been…with one big glaring exceptions that she tries not to think of). Anyway, she might have forgotten about it, but she was absolutely sure that she didn’t have any minor associated with it. And she certainly didn’t have a child in real life. It’s not like something you can forget until someone reminds you and you go ‘oh, yeah, I used to have one’.

She considered the possibility of it being a trap. But the identity was not associated to her hero alter-ego. Or to her real job, which also made her a fair share of enemies. The hospital seemed a weird location anyway.

So she went.

She wasn’t sure what she was expecting, considering the call she had gotten, but she was still surprised when she was shown to a room where a young girl, a teenager actually, immediately started to apologise as soon as she saw her. Saying that she had told them not to call her. A nurse interrupted the girl, explaining, probably not for the first time from the tone, that they couldn’t let her leave without her guardian signing her out.

It didn’t take long for Catherine to realise who the girl was. She didn’t know many teenagers, and those eyes were familiar. Perhaps surprising that she noticed that first as the pink hair were a dead giveaway.

As she was explained what happened and what medication and care the girl would need, all Catherine could think about was that she had hit a teenager. Less often and not as hard as she could have, but she still did it.

Catherine had a lot of questions, but she knew the hospital wasn’t the place to talk. So she signed her out. She had been prepared for a variety of scenarios, from being recognized and asked why she was using a fake name to being asked why she was picking up a random kid…but she didn’t need any of it. Apparently if you share the same last name and look old enough to be her mother (albeit a young one, Catherine would like to think), nobody asks questions.

They got out, Katherine trailing meekly behind her. Got in the car and started driving. The car was silent. Catherine was trying to reconcile the fact that not too long ago they were fighting on a roof and now she had her ‘nemesis’ in her car after springing her out from the hospital…her very teenage girl nemesis. Someone who had been a child not too long ago.

She found a spot and parked. She didn’t want to have the conversation while driving. She checked around. She wanted to be sure that they’d have privacy, but she didn’t want to come across as creepy…let’s take the teenager to a secluded spot and ‘talk’ kind of creepy.

‘So…Katherine, right?’ Catherine had been surprised that a supposed mother-daughter duo sharing a name, well, almost, didn’t raise any eyebrow…but better for her.

The girl nods.

Questions whirred around her head, but she settled on the two main ones. How did she know that name? And why did she give it?

‘I’m pretty good with computer stuff,’ the first words Katherine had uttered besides the panicky apologies at the hospital were soft-spoken. ‘And I needed an emergency contact for school.’ She chanced a glance at Catherine. ‘You’re, like, good. You’re a hero. And you’re a good person even in real life.’

Right, she knows about her identity because she is good with computers. Catherine would worry about that later, but she had a more pressing question. ‘What about your parents? Family?’ She’d understand if she had gotten hurt while out as Pink Menace, not wanting them to know about her…uhm, mostly nocturnal activities. But she got hurt at school. Surely that would make more sense.

She almost wished she hadn’t asked as Katherine unravelled her tale. How she had been the youngest of ten children, with her mom dying when she was around 5 and her father never really caring much for her. How when she was 13 her siblings’ music teacher offered to teach her too. Her dad didn’t want because he didn’t deem her worthy of spending money on but caved when Henry Mannox said he didn’t have to pay. So she started taking music lessons and she loved them…until she discovered that her dad didn’t have to pay, but she did…and not with money. How she went to her father and was told she was ungrateful and lying, an attention-seeking brat. How she was sent away and the same thing happened with her step-grandma’s secretary, and once again she was not believed. She was told she had been asking for it. Katherine had protested, saying she wasn’t. That she’d never ask for a man’s attention because she was a lesbian. She was kicked out. Her dad hadn’t wanted to do anything with her, her siblings following suit.  

Catherine would have been worried about the strangely unemotional way she was telling her story (maybe the meds she was on were making her a bit loopy?), but she was too busy trying to remind herself that she couldn’t kill people. Both her lives depended on her reputation as one of the good ones, and good ones don’t kill, even child-abusive, homophobic assholes (or do they?). And how could anyone ever think that she could be a villain, the same girl admitting that she would feel guilty at pickpocketing and stealing even if she needed it to survive because she was 14 and homeless??

Katherine went on, seemingly ignoring Catherine’s turmoil. Talking about how she realised she didn’t feel as guilty if she was stealing from assholes. How she escalated from pickpocketing those who were rude to waitresses and homeless people to following those of them who were obviously rich to their houses and breaking in. How she got quite good with lock picking and acrobatics and security systems.

And then through her school, because yes, she still had that going on too, she got an internship at one of Henry Tudor’s firms. She thought it was the occasion of a lifetime. A chance to change ‘career’, to stop stealing because she would get some money while getting experience that would hopefully help her getting a job after school. Except he was just like the others.

‘How old were you?’ Catherine croaked out. She didn’t know why she was asking. She had seen the date of birth when she signed the girl out. There was no good answer. Every time she thought Henry couldn’t get any worse, he always managed to surpass even her worst expectations.

‘Almost 16.’

That was also around the time Pink Menace appeared. Katherine nodded. She couldn’t speak up. She knew that. If her own family didn’t believe her, what chances did she have against ‘the king’ of the city? He would completely destroy her and any hope for a better future that she still held. But she could get revenge. In a way. Do something, at least. During her internship she heard things. People would talk…and well, she was just a stupid pretty little thing, wasn’t she?

Catherine ended up driving Katherine home. If you could call that so. The girl could see it written on her face, apparently, because as they climbed the stairs, and wow, Catherine didn’t even want to start thinking about what was on the walls, on the steps, on the…well, everything. She just made sure to avoid even brushing against anything at all. No questions nor documents asked costed, Katherine calmly stated, while Catherine was playing a ‘everything is lava’ extreme version game.

‘What about your…extra-curricular activities?’

Katherine locked the door before answering. It was not like she could sell Henry’s secrets. Well. She could, obviously. But who could tell her that they wouldn’t end up in even worse hands? Not for the first time Catherine wondered exactly what he was involved with, because Katherine made it sound way bigger and way worse than just industrial secrets. And that would mean the dark net, Katherine continued, and there was always an element of danger in it, even more with what she would be dealing with, and she had enough to deal with at the moment, thank you very much. She was trying to graduate school, save the world and trying not to die in the process.

So yeah, what little money she actually made was mostly for rent. Food.

‘Can I offer you something? I have,’ Katherine opened the fridge. ‘Water, and-,’ she sniffed the milk, grimaced, and threw it out. ‘Water. Sorry.’

Not a lot of it, from the pitiful state of her fridge.

‘Don’t take it wrong, but what are you doing?’ Catherine interrupted her. ‘Why are telling me all of this?’

‘I was hoping that you also wouldn’t want to let Henry get away with it, because, you know…’ Right. The girl knows her real identity too. ‘I can give you what I have on him so while I’m in jail-’

‘Wait, jail? You took me to your place thinking I would send you to jail?!? What kind of person do you think– you know what? Don’t answer that.’ Catherine looked at the girl. At the bare flat. At the hard drives that she had taken out from what had seemed an empty cupboard. ‘I’m not taking you to the police…but I’m taking you home with me.’

‘What?’

‘You heard what the doctors said. How would you even do some of that by yourself?’ Some of the instructions definitely required a second pair of hands.

‘Like I did before.’ Kat shrugs, absolutely unfazed.

As if Catherine needed a reminder, thank you very much. She hadn’t stopped thinking about it. Like that time that she knew for sure she was hurt, because she had been slower in evading her hits, and she had stumbled away rather than the usually graceful exit…Henry had boosted the next day about his security team having managed to hit ‘the Pink Menace that was hassling him’. She couldn’t stop imagining her crawling to this hole, dealing with her injuries alone. And all the times her own blows landed? She had hit a 16-year-old girl?!? That will be forever on her conscience.

‘You don’t need to now. I want to help.’

Suspicion was clear on Katherine’s face. Like she was trying to figure out why Catherine would want to help her. Fair enough, considering her experience with adults. Which made her accepting all the more important. Half-hearted protests finally petered out, a sliver of relief that someone was willing to take care of her shining through despite Katherine’s best efforts to keep a neutral face.

Catherine could help being touched by the trust Katherine was showing her, as the girl collected what she wanted to bring with her. Some clothes. School stuff. Technology…quite impressive, but ‘Can’t hack or do corporate espionage on school computers!’.

‘Is this…?’ Catherine was trying to give her some privacy, but her eyes had fallen upon a familiar choker.

‘Voice modifier? Yeah. I had just started when I stumbled upon a…hideout? It was full of gadget and stuff, and well, I took some.’ Catherine knew it reminded her of something! Green Phantom also wore a choker, albeit it was…well, green and not pink. ‘I left most of the weapons. No need to make an enemy out of the owner, you know. Also I never really wanted to hurt anybody, so…’

‘Is this everything?’

It wasn’t much, but Katherine nodded. ‘I don’t need much.’ She didn’t have much. ‘And I will be back soon anyway.’

Not if Catherine had a say in it. All the times she thought she didn’t have maternal instinct? Sure, she might have wished for children during her marriage, but she had been so happy not to have had them and she never revisited the topic after. So she thought that maybe she had ‘wanted’ them because it was expected. Because it was what she needed to have a perfect family. To keep him. But maybe she never actually wanted them. Maybe she just wasn’t made to be a parent.

Maybe she was wrong, Catherine mused weeks later watching Katherine setting up a veritable workstation in a corner of her home office. The girl had agreed to remain with her even after her injuries had healed. She also agreed that Pink Menace would take a backseat while she focused on school. With her previous ‘nemesis’ turned tech support, Golden Crown’s life was definitely easier and less busy. Which meant more time to devote to taking ‘the king’ down. And once he would be dealt with, Catherine would move onto every single person who had ever hurt Katherine.

So yeah. Maybe she was wrong. Because Catherine is pretty sure that she had basically adopted a teenager and it had been the best decision she had ever made in her life.

[afterourhearts]

Eyeliner Tears

Why are Asian eyes so ugly? I thought to myself as I outlined their shape with the blackest liner I could dig out from the free Lancôme makeup samples Mom never used. This was my daily routine since I first discovered the beautiful black pencil when I was 12 alongside lip gloss, mascara, and blush. But eyeliner was my favorite – changing most dramatically what I hated most passionately. • Monolids are ugly because they make eyes look like slits. • Double lids are ‘mutant’ because, as my white medical professor once so aptly described, “Epicanthic folds are a prominent feature of Down Syndrome. If you don’t know what they are, Asians commonly have this feature.” Let’s face it: we can’t win, at least not in the beauty arena. But with my eyeliner adding the illusion of a larger eye, I felt halfway there. Not everyone, however, appreciated my foray into adolescent self-transformation. The Chinese beauty culture operates very differently than American beauty culture: pale skin, small mouths, soft bodies, and youthful innocence are prized over glowing tans, wide smiles, athletic frames, and sultry seductiveness. To achieve the Chinese beauty ideal of youthful innocence, heavy makeup such as eyeliner is unacceptable, and makeup at all is frowned upon for younger girls. Mom called them “raccoon eyes” and told me I looked uglier with it on but I never heeded her advice. She also said respectable girls did not waste their time on vanities like makeup, but rather immersed themselves in their studies. She especially hated when I wore makeup to church, a place where teenage girls are supposed to look extra pure. I rolled my raccoon eyes. One year, I met a new girl at our Chinese Christian Church. She was talkative, witty, similarly loved makeup and rebellion, and we became fast friends. This same year, a new youth pastor arrived at our church. He was funny, fluent, and finally our first youth pastor who wasn’t middle-aged. So how do they tie back to eyeliner? Prior to their arrival, I dreaded attending church, paranoid that the judgmental eyes of multitudes of Chinese parents hated my appearance and shared the Chinese cultural views held by my mother. Was it paranoia, or was I just observant? Adults would enthusiastically praise my younger brother’s handsome features and say nothing about my appearance other than, “She is tall!” Their smiles seemed disingenuous and their attitudes towards me distant. Or maybe I was just overly sensitive. Regardless, much of that paranoia melted away with the arrival of a new friend and youth pastor – two characters who seemed more attuned than the other members to the Asian-American dichotomy that was my life. I began to loosen up at church, smile more, and even happily greet the adults. I felt … safe. Maybe not enthusiastically accepted, but also not frowned upon with disdain. One might wonder why I was so concerned for approval from within my Chinese church. When you live in a country spearheaded by people who don’t view you as truly American, you cling onto the safe spaces that still might take you in and consider you a member. I wasn’t aware of how shaky my walls of comfort had been built, though, until one sentence caused them to tumble back down again. “He said he doesn’t like you because you wear so much eyeliner.” She told me. She being my new best friend and he being the cool and young youth pastor we both adored. “How do you know this?” I asked, disbelief and doubt at each other’s throats in the battleground that was now my mind. “Because he told my mom. And my mom told me that it’s not just him who thinks this way, but a lot of other parents. They tell their kids to stay away from you because you are a bad influence.” Bad influence. Me, the introvert who rarely speaks, a bad influence? I let that sink in. That night, I considered giving up my eyeliner. I thought all my fears about being hated by my friends’ parents were unfounded and paranoid. I thought my youth pastor would especially not judge me by something so exterior – actually, why would he judge me at all? Why would a grown ass man concern himself so heavily with whether a teenage girl wears eyeliner? Anger and sadness bubbled up around me. How did one of my greatest fears, one I thought had been pushed away and laid to rest for good, one which only my new friend knew so intimately, suddenly come to surface all over again? And that’s when it hit me: maybe she lied. The seed of thought that this supposed best friend might not actually like me at all was planted. And over the next few months, it thirstily drank up water and sunlight. I befriended other girls and began to uncover bits and pieces of the horrifying truth: she did hate me, and they had evidence. Screen captures and chat conversations were forwarded to my inbox. Not only did she tell others about how terrible I supposedly was, she also told them I disliked all of them and fabricated statements I had never uttered nor so much as thought. I could not believe it – why did she want to destroy my life and capitalize on my insecurities? What did I ever do but consider her my friend? Sometimes, you never get answers. Not too many months after, she moved again. We stumbled across each other’s Instagram accounts a few years later. She had dyed hair, tattoos, piercings all over, eyeliner wings bolder than I had ever applied, false lashes nearly reaching her thickly painted eyebrows, the same deceptively sweet smile as when we first met, and was surrounded by other Asian girls. I once burned with the anger of her betrayal, but all I could think about now was her new embodiment of the criticisms she claimed were the reasons for my rejection from our community and how ironic our appearances were now – me being the studious medical student who sometimes forgets to wear eyeliner and she being the girl who refuses to be seen in public without it - the pictorial epitome of the bad influence she once used to mark me for social abandonment from our only remaining community. Irony, Karma, or Hypocrisy? Today, I won’t know if sprinkled between her lies were grains of truth, and if her comment about my reputation was one of them. I won’t know if my eventual submission to certain Asian cultural values drew its main roots from my teenage experience of potential two-fold community rejection. I won’t know if she ever realized the extent to which she hurt me or if she continues to hurt in similarly sneaky ways our other Asian sisters struggling to find acceptance and self-love in a land which has subjected them to unwarranted rejection. What I do know is this: We All Cry The Same Eyeliner Tears Yes, we do. They trickle down from our unmistakably Asian eyes, glide along our sunscreen laden faces, and leave smudgy black streaks to remind us of both our perceived physical imperfections as well as our efforts to conceal the ugliness we feel inside. 

Feeling ugly is not just some manifestation of low self-esteem as these American schools/media/counselors might tell us in order to erase from our mutual history and from their responsibility the ‘chink’ comments that we heard or the fingers-pulling-eyes-upward-to-mimic-us that we saw.

Our damaged self-esteem is not some personal mental and emotional disorder or a reflection of our weakness but a collective experience caused largely in part by the pervasive belief that some belong here but we don’t and that some are beautiful but we aren’t. Don’t think that just because dating apps are now asserting, “Asian girls are the most desired race!” that the girls who come after us are protected from the less-than we endured. The American dating scene did not just become more “accepting” of us – we changed to look more like them. But underneath the beautifully and extravagantly drawn eyeliner wings, the perfectly filled in eyebrows, the time-consuming application of fake lashes, the hours spent at the gym to avoid ‘Asian flat butt’ stereotypes, and the sharp cut of the surgery knife on our eyelids, we still cannot help but wonder: is this beautiful yet? And when he says, “Yes”, we still worry, was I not beautiful before? Do we really want to be with the ones who only want what is made-to-order, and overlook the ones who saw the original, in all its imperfections, as worth discovering? So while I have every right to be mad at my Asian sister for the hurtful actions she made against me as a result of her wanting to be more accepted by our community than I was, I cannot lose sight of the more formidable barrier to our collective inability to self-love: not the lies she told before, but the lies they still tell today. Why are my Asian eyes so ugly? I used to think to myself constantly. And if you’ve read this until the end, I think you know the answer.

_____________________________________________________________

Comments: Friends who have read this far or read my shared thoughts at all, I know my experiences are not isolated. My past shared posts related to familial pressures and relationships have shown me just how overlapping our experiences can be. The feelings of low self-esteem and self-image at some time or another in your life is probably a universal one. Experiences of betrayal are sadly quite common. Hopefully you enjoyed this short piece - it’s a bit different from the other posts I’ve written (a little more cleaned up and narrative when compared to my usual frenetic ranting) ... anyways, I wanted to share that I’ve been working on putting together some more shorts + poems in my free time (this is how I destress from school haha) and something I hope to achieve through writing with this project (and since day one) is unfiltered and unapologetic storytelling highlighting the Asian voice that is so often completely ignored in discussions of race and discrimination. I’m not saying our experiences are to be equated to the experiences of other minorities because noo, but I am saying we should at least be included in the discussion. 

This brings me to my next point: I want to continue to share your stories too. If you have experiences you want to share related in any way to your identity as an Asian-American female, I want to hear them and with your permission, try to make prose or poetry of it. Text me, message me, or call me and let’s get in touch :) Thank you for being a part of this whether as a reader or direct contributor. Let’s shape our collective voice!!!

[olderthannetfic]

How old are fic writers?

salarinnar mentioned you on a post

“if i saw a person walking around with an ao3 duffel bag i’d kill them...”

@olderthannetfic i am aware that back back in the day when you could send your short stories (so, also fanfics) they were written primarly by adults and young adults. but there was a study done in 2014? 15? about demographics of ff .net and im pretty sure 80% of the userbase was underage or at least under 21. maybe i worded the previous reply wrong but minors and young adults have more time to consume media therefore it makes sense to me that they would create most

@salarinnar

Ohhh. That’s an interesting point. You are correct that some spaces do have a much younger average age. FF.net trends a bit younger than AO3. So does Wattpad.

Those FFN numbers you’re remembering are from 2010. They represent users who have stated their ages in their profiles (something there isn’t a specific field for). 80% of people who bothered to include that info were teenagers. I probably don’t need to tell you what that statistic actually represents: Adults find exact ages unimportant. 36 and 38 are functionally the same in a way that 16 and 18 are not. Adults also don’t like putting so much info in their fanfic bios. FFN’s actual average age is probably young-ish, but this particular stat is not reliable.

Centrumlumina found an average AO3 age of around 25. I suspect it’s slightly low because of various things about the data collection, but it’s probably in the ballpark. But average of 25 does not mean most people are 25! It means there are significant younger populations and then a huge spread over all other ages.

But more than that, it depends on which set of fanfic-loving fans we’re looking at.

When astolat proposed AO3 in 2007, she was in the sort of LJ community that had a lot of 20-somethings and 30-somethings. Today, many of the people who were instrumental in early OTW are like 45-50. This isn’t some random thing I’m pulling out of my ass: I was LJ friends with most of them. We’ve gone to the same cons. We weren’t young in 2007, and we’re definitely not young now. I see quite a few familiar names from LJ in the notes here on Tumblr.

These are people who make things happen in fandom, from websites to fic exchanges. They’re particularly noticeable, though the majority will always be silent lurkers who read a fic or two and aren’t terribly socially involved in fandom.

There’s a big difference between these groups:

People who have read at least 1 fic

People who have written at least 1 fic

BNFs other fans remember by username and follow

People who run major infrastructure that costs money

It’s a lot easier to be a fic writer than to slog through setting up a nonprofit, so there are plenty of younger writers even among BNFs, but the advantages of free time that young people have tend to be offset by the advantages of experience when it comes to writing that’s popular. I can certainly think of BNFs who got big in their early 20s, but I can think of far more who were more popular a decade or two later.

People who move on after a year are always the majority. Die-hards who stick around forever are not, but they’re often who people are thinking of as the core identity of a subculture. I know a lot of people who’ve read one fic because they were curious what the fuss was about, but I wouldn’t really count them as part of “fandom”, you know? Silent lurkers are always around, but they’re not part of my perception of fandom because... well... they don’t interact with me, by definition.

So a lot of it is about where we draw the lines.