#i sometimes feel like an idiot when i talk about this

[aurorawritestoescape]

I KNOW BETTER THAN TO CALL YOU MINE

Pre outbreak Joel Miller x f!reader || 7k

Summary: Joel lets himself have a treat. You.

Tw: 18+ mdni, smut, fluff, slight age gap (reader’s in her early 20s, Joel is 30), sex work, idiots in love, soft Joel, praise kink, size kink, f/m oral, cum eating, alcohol consumption, m!masturbation, sex toy usage, bondage, protected/unprotected piv, creampie, light pussy spanking, somno, aftercare, mention of degradation, pet names (baby, sweetheart, honey). Reader has hair, wears dresses. Pics are for the mood only, reader has no specific physical descriptions.

A/n: this is for @janaispunk ‘s 1500 kisses challenge. My prompt was ‘first kiss’ with Joel Miller. Congrats again, Jana, and thank you for the fun challenge!😘 The pic in the m/b is from this post by @liminaltourist. Hugs and kisses to @milla-frenchy for beta-ing😘🫂 dividers by @saradika-graphics 💕 The title is from the lyrics of ‘Let’s fall in love for the night’ by FINNEAS. Hope you will enjoy this story! Love you all!💖

MASTERLIST

Joel met you at Tommy’s birthday party and was instantly attracted to you. You were beautiful, sweet, funny, a little shy which he found charming. You told him that you worked as a waitress, meanwhile looking for a steady job after graduating college. He spent the whole night talking to you. The whole night being a couple of hours when he had a sitter for Sarah. Joel noticed a trace of sadness in your gorgeous eyes while you two were saying your goodbyes and for a second he regretted the way his life turned out. A single father at the age of thirty, working tirelessly to give his daughter the best life he could. But all the regrets vanished into thin air the moment he returned home and saw Sarah, sleeping peacefully in her bed. He planted a gentle kiss on her temple and quietly went to his empty bedroom. She was his life and he was ok with it.

Next time when Joel went out with Tommy for a drink, he asked about you in passing. He tried to make it seem like a simple curiosity but his younger brother still gave him a knowing smirk. Joel really liked you but his life was hectic enough. Work and being a single parent took all his time and he couldn’t squeeze in a relationship. He wouldn’t be a good boyfriend, he thought, and you deserved only the best. But your image— your eyes, your smile, your body, was flashing behind his eyes again and again, reminding him that he had needs and desires.

After a few beers and tequila shots, their conversation circled back to you and Tommy blabbed out that you worked as an escort. Joel was astonished. You seemed shy and sweet. He had never been against sex work but he always imagined a different type of people in that business. He didn’t know what to make of it but he felt his cock twitch, thinking of how sexually liberated you were.

He thought about asking for your number, but Tommy would tease him to death and he decided not to.

The next time you met Joel was at another Tommy’s party. Joel agreed to come, wanting to see you again. You talked and laughed like before but the air was almost electric between you two. The glances were darker, your hand brushing his skin here and there made him want more— touch you, feel you close against his body. He could save up and do all that if you agreed. So he made a decision and offered to drive you home when the party was over.

As soon as Joel parked his car at your driveway, he cleared his throat and asked if he could see you sometime.

“Are you asking me out on a date?” Your voice was soft and a shy smile tugged at your lips.

“Ehm… fuck, I —I know what you do,” Joel admitted, turning to you slightly in the driver’s seat, “Tommy told me when he was drunk. Forgive him and me, please, ok? And— I don’t know what you call that, but— can I meet you for an appointment?”

Your face fell and you were blinking at him with a mouth agape. Joel’s heart froze- what if Tommy had been fucking with him and you didn’t sleep with people for money.

After a few longest seconds of his life, you took a deep breath and gave him a little nod. Joel asked you about the details and you explained to him what he needed to do to book a session with you and though you were talking about sex, it sounded cold and dry. You gave him a little smile before getting out of the car and he drove off with the thought that he had made a mistake.

He really didn’t plan to call you, thinking he had killed whatever spark and connection you two had, but his thoughts returned to you again and again. He was hearing your laugh everywhere and your face was behind his eyelids every time he went to sleep.

One night after a few beers he imagined you in his bed and his hand flew to his already stiffening cock. He shut his eyes and saw you next to him, naked and ready for him. Pleasuring himself, Joel imagined your hand wrapped around his length, sliding up and down, then your tongue sucking on his tip and soon he was spurting his load all over his stomach and fist. He could have you, you already agreed to it, and he deserved to feel good, to treat himself once in a while. With those thoughts on his mind he texted you and booked a session.

Joel tried to be on time for your first meeting, but everything seemed to go wrong that day and when he arrived at a hotel, you were already waiting for him at the bar. He showered you with apologies for being late but you assured him that it was ok. He felt the flames of desire, when he took you all in. Your black dress was hugging your body perfectly and he couldn’t wait to take it off you.

You had already got a room for them so Joel followed you to the elevator. He had never been that nervous in his life. You must have noticed it, so you took his hand and gave him a warm smile.

“I’m so glad we’re doing this, Joel.”

“Never done this before,” he admitted when the elevator doors opened and you walked to the room.

“It’s ok, Joel. I’m sure we’re going to have a great time,” you said, smiling to him, and opened the door.

When Joel stepped inside, he saw a typical hotel room with one big bed. You turned to him and asked,

“Before we start, do you have any questions or suggestions about what you want us to do?”

Joel swallowed loudly.

“I want —, he scratched the back of his neck and continued, “just the usual, I guess.”

“The usual?” you repeated with a little smirk.

“Yeah, just sex.”

You pouted your lips in thought, then smiled with mischief in your gaze and slowly came up to him.

His breath hitched when your behavior changed in front of his eyes, like a little kitten turned into a panther in a matter of seconds. You looked the same but there was an allure in your every move, each glance was magnetic, as if you were calling for him to touch you, fuck you. You were irresistible. Your body was inches away from him, your perfume subtle but enticing, enveloping him, and you purred,

“I don’t think we want it to be ‘just’ sex, Joel. How about we make it special.”

Your tongue caressed your lower lip and he slowly leaned down. You swiftly swerved him and instead of tasting your lips, he nuzzled your cheek.

“I’m sorry, Joel— I don’t kiss on the lips during sessions.”

“Oh fuck, sorry.” Joel felt really bad and explained, “I got carried away... I’ve read the rules you sent me… I remember no kissing part, like in “Pretty Woman”,” Joel chuckled, rubbing his scruffy cheek in a nervous gesture.

You giggled, too, probably trying to make him feel more comfortable, “Yes, just like in “Pretty Woman.”

Without noticing it, he tried to memorize the sound of your laugh, how pretty it was. You slightly pulled away from him and tilted your head.

“How about I take the lead at first and then we’ll see how it goes?”

Joel nodded. He wanted to take your dress off, carry you to the bed and fuck you till you screamed his name. But he was afraid to do something wrong, he’d never been in that type of situation. You took his hand and gently caressed it, your fingers dancing over his hardened skin. Then he watched you bring it to your red lips and kiss his palm. You glanced up at him with your big beautiful eyes, not taking his hand away and his whole body reacted to your gentle touch. He was getting hard.

You led Joel to the bed, your fingers intertwined with his, and gently pushed on his shoulders to make him sit down. You slowly took your dress off and he tried not to start drooling like a cartoon wolf, seeing you in front of him in a black lacy set.

You stood between his spread thighs and bent over to tug at the hem of his dark tee. He helped you to take it off and when you kneeled in front of him, he almost moaned. Your beautiful face was so close, he wanted to kiss you so much but he couldn’t and he’d never do anything you didn’t want.

You unbuckled his belt and softly asked him to take his jeans off.

Soon Joel was sitting there in his boxer briefs with you on your knees between his spread thighs.

"You're so hot, Joel," you whispered, as your dark gaze slid over the expense of his broad shoulders and chest, and your nails slightly scratched his muscular thighs.

He breathed out a laugh, shaking his head. He wanted to tell you how gorgeous you look, wearing your lingerie and your high heel shoes, how much he'd been thinking about you since the day you'd met but his mouth was dry and he felt himself like a teenage boy who was trying to compliment a hot girl.

You weren't aware of his inner torment. As always calm and confident, you leaned closer to his torso and kissed a spot on his chest, right over his heart. Joel took a sharp breath and shut his eyes for a second, trying to calm down. He couldn't believe what just a gentle chest kiss from you was doing to him, but he was already painfully hard.

Your lips glided lower and you started leaving open mouth kisses, tracing a path down to the bulge in his boxers, and he opened his thighs wider to give you more space. When your face was close to his clothed cock, you rested your head on his left thigh and looked up at him.

“Fuck,” Joel cursed and growled at the sight of you so close to his already throbbing manhood. You were so pretty, so obedient but even on your knees he felt that you controlled the situation.

“Joel?”

“Yes, baby?”

You smiled hearing the pet name and asked,

“Can I take you in my mouth?”

His cock visibly twitched when he heard your soft voice and the words you uttered.

“If you want.”

You bit your lower lip and asked, rubbing your cheek on his hairy thigh.

“I do but would you like me to?”

Joel nodded eagerly, maybe too eagerly but he didn’t care. He wanted you so much.

With a content smile, you sat up straight and shifted on your knees, getting comfortable. Then you pulled at the waistband of his boxers and in a second they were on the floor and his cock was bobbing in front of your face. Your breath visibly hitched and you glanced up at him.

“You have a gorgeous cock, Joel Miller,” you whispered and he wanted to kiss you again, hearing the praise. But instead he brought his hand to your face and cupped your cheek. You purred into his touch but parted from his palm in a second when you lowered your face and kitten-licked the fat tip of his cock. Joel sighed and bucked his hips already impatient for more. You didn’t make him wait long.

Your lips soon welcomed his cock between them as you started taking him deeper, covering his length with your warm saliva as your hand was firmly wrapped around his girthy base.

Joel moaned loudly at the sensation, he didn’t care what sounds he was making, completely lost in the pleasure your soft lips and skilful tongue were giving him.

Your mouth was slowly caressing his cock as your curved up lips were sliding over his sensitive skin and your tongue danced around the fat head, now and then stroking the leaking slit. There was so much precum, he saw you swallow it again and again. Your hand was gently massaging his balls and his big palm was lying on your head, not pushing, just showing you how much he needed you at that moment. Joel was in heaven.

Soon you took all of him and your throat contracting around his length was the last straw. He was dangerously close to coming and painting your mouth creamy white. But he had other plans for you.

“Shit, baby,” he cupped your cheek and gently pulled you off his ready-to-explode cock, “you’re too fucking good at it. I won’t last. And I wanna..”

He lost his words as you were looking at him with sparkling eyes, full of understanding and warmth.

“Of course, Joel.” You slowly got up on your feet and took off your high heels. Then you padded to the nightstand and opened the drawer. Joel saw a few toys lying there and his heart started to beat faster when he imagined using them on you. Maybe he could suggest it, he mused inwardly, but when you started sliding your panties and bra off your body, he lost his train of thought.

Now completely naked you came up to him and placed your hands on his broad shoulders. Then you planted your knees on each side of him and got on his lap.

“You’re beautiful,” Joel said in a low voice as his hands found your hips and he rubbed your skin with his calloused thumbs.

You thanked him, smiling, and opened the package with your teeth. You brought the condom to his hard cock, slid it on and then got up on your knees, your pussy hovering over Joel’s tip.

You searched for his eyes and as soon as your eyes locked, you started sinking on his thick length.

Joel watched pleasure twisting your face while his cock was slowly parting your insides. He moaned at the sensation of your wet warm pussy welcoming him, grasped your hips tightly and when you took all of him, your ass was flush with his balls, you both loudly sighed.

“You feel so good, baby. So warm and tight.”

“Thank you, Joel. Your cock is so fucking big.”

He took a sharp breath, hearing you curse, and at the back of his mind he wondered if you said it to every client but he drove the thought away. He needed you too much.

Your breasts were right in front of his face and he asked, looking up at you, as if you were a goddess he was praying to.

“Is it ok if I kiss your body?”

“Yes, Joel, please. You can do anything to me.”

“Just not kiss your beautiful lips?”

“Joel,” you whined and he felt you clench around his hard cock.

He scolded himself for those words as soon as they left his stupid mouth. It was the thing you kept for yourself, he understood and accepted it but his desire drove him insatiable.

“I’m sorry, baby, I know it’s a rule. I understand it. It’s jus’ my brain doesn’t work properly, all the blood is down there.”

“Oh, right,” you softly giggled, “Let me shut you up then.”

You lifted your hips, making his cock almost leave the heaven of your cunt, but when the tip was close to slipping out, you sank back down on his manhood inch by inch, gliding your hands over his broad chest.

Joel’s mouth got slack and you both moaned at the ecstatic sensation of him, filling you up again.

With a groan Joel swiftly put his mouth on your breast and you whimpered when he swirled his tongue around your perky nipple. While he was gently sucking and licking your tits, you were languidly riding him, as soft whimpers were leaving your half parted mouth. At one point you nuzzled his forehead and your hot breath on his lips let him imagine you kiss him. His fingers dug into your hips but just for a second. Afraid to hurt you he glided them over your back and arms. He raised his lips to your neck and kissed your skin there.

Joel knew that he was getting close. His hand slithered to your pussy and he slipped his thumb between your folds. He found your clit hardened and throbbing for attention. He began stroking it slowly and you reacted immediately with the sweetest sound he’d ever heard.

“Joel,” you breathed out and he clenched his jaw, trying not to explode right then and there.

“Want you to come on my cock, baby.”

You stopped bouncing on his member and he saw you furrow your brows in concentration.

He made his thumb dance faster over your bud and soon your pussy was pulsating around his cock. Your contracting walls sent him over the edge and he started coming, filling up the condom inside you. Oh, how he wished to paint your walls with his creamy load but rules are rules.

As you both started descending from your highs, panting heavily, Joel held you in his big arms and you rested on his broad chest. You were breathing into the crease between his neck and shoulder and at one point he thought you’d fallen asleep.

But the next second you sat up straight on his lap with a satisfied smile. You gently kissed his scruffy cheek and he tried not to purr like a happy cat.

You cuddled a little bit more but soon his time was over.

“Can I see you again?” He asked when you got out of the bed.

“I’d love to, Joel,” you replied, putting on your underwear, “Text me when you have a day in mind.”

You looked like you wanted to say something but stopped yourself. You put on your clothes, kissed his cheek again and left.

After the first time with you Joel knew immediately it wasn’t the last. The need to have you, to be with you again squeezed his heart as soon as that hotel door closed behind you. But he wasn’t rich. He couldn’t spend all his money on you. So he started saving up here and there, anything he could, without damaging the level of life of his daughter.

He texted you as soon as he had enough to pay you and you told him that your regulars got a discount which was a nice surprise for him.

Joel invited you to his place. Sarah was at a sleepover and he had the house for himself for a night. He needed just a couple of hours, no way he could afford a whole night with you.

When you arrived at his place, wearing a pair of tight jeans and a tank top, his mouth immediately started watering. He tried to be a gentleman and a good host and gave you a tour of the house, but when you stepped into his bedroom, all his decency came crashing down. Soon your jeans were discarded on the floor while his head was between your trembling thighs. Joel was licking up your juices straight from the source, grunting into your wet cunt and fucking his tongue into your clenching hole. He was fully clothed, grinding his hard cock against the bed and staining his gray sweatpants.

You were singing for him so beautifully when he began plunging his thick fingers in and out of your heat while his mouth was gently sucking on your throbbing clit. Your back was arched and your hands were clutching his dark curls. He curled his fingers, pushing on that soft spot inside your creaming pussy once, twice and you came, crying out his name, while your walls were fluttering around his digits.

When he parted from your puffy glistening cunt, he saw tears in your hazy eyes. Joel was happy he still got it but what filled his chest with pride was that he made you cry and writhe with ecstasy.

"I'm here, baby. You did so good for me," Joel praised you, climbing up the bed and taking you in his arms. You were trying to catch your breath and he gave you a respite, manhandling you so your head would be resting on his broad shoulder.

"Thank you, Joel, you didn't have to," you mumbled.

"Have to? Sweetheart, it was my pleasure."

He heard your giggle, followed by a content sigh. His hard cock was tenting his gray sweatpants but he didn't care. He was happy to hold you, breathe in the fruity scent of your hair, and when a few minutes later he saw you peacefully sleeping in his embrace, his heart almost burst with affection. He closed his eyes for a second and drifted off too.

Joel woke up in the middle of the night when he felt you move in your sleep. He must have woken you up as you started to shuffle next to him and then sat up straight.

“Fuck! I fell asleep?” You asked, eyes widened, covering your naked thighs with a bedspread.

“Yeah, me too.”

“I’m so sorry, Joel. It’s never happened before. Oh my god, it’s so unprofessional.”

He hastily sat up next to you, taking your hands in his.

“Hey, no. It’s ok. I loved sleeping with you— next to you.”

He smiled, leaning closer to you and rubbing your hands with his thumbs, trying to reassure you and it seemed to work because you gave him an apologetic smile but he felt you relax a little.

“I won’t take any money from you today.”

“No, you spent so much time with me. I owe you even more.”

“Joel, you ate me out, made me come, and then I fell asleep. I definitely don’t deserve to get paid,” you giggled. “The way I see it I owe you now.”

“I’ll think about the career change,” Joel chuckled and at the same time he felt his cock get harder when you talked about the oral. The arousal he had felt before falling asleep came back with a renewed force and swept him away.

He wasn’t smiling anymore, his gaze slid up and down your body and the air in the room got heavier.

“What did you like the most?” he asked as his eyes darkened.

Your breath hitched and even in the dim light of the room he saw your pupils dilate. You dropped your gaze for a second and when you raised your eyes, they were filled with need and desire.

“I loved how much you enjoyed it. How good you were. It felt amazing when your mouth was on my clit. When you were sucking it,” you bit your lip almost shyly and your words went straight to his cock.

You whispered, “Should I go or…?”

“I wanna fuck you,” Joel interrupted you, palming his stiffening bulge, and you quickly nodded before throwing away the bedspread and taking off your top. Your tits bounced as you straddled him and he wrapped his big arms around your naked body.

Joel let you take off his shirt and when your lips latched onto his neck he held you closer and flipped you on the bed, covering you with his body.

You gasped at the fast shift but then moaned when Joel pulled his cock out of his sweatpants.

It was already hard as a rock and wet with precum under his fingers. He gave it a few pumps to spread it over his heated skin.

“Shit, condoms.”

He hastily reached to grab a pack from the nightstand. He opened one, while your fingers were caressing him, dancing over his torso and arms. As soon as the protection was on, you pulled him closer and he pushed his length into you without any warning. He had already stretched you with his tongue and fingers so his tip easily slipped into your crying hole.

“Oh, yeah, baby,” Joel breathed out and started rolling his hips. His lips were caressing every spot he could reach and you were kissing his shoulders and neck.

Without pausing he braced his hands on the bed, hovering over you, his dark gaze locked with yours. He wanted to memorize every lip bite, every twitch of your brows when his cock was sliding in and out your needy cunt. You were so wet for him, he felt your juices on his balls and inner thighs and he closed his eyes trying not to come too soon.

“Look at me, Joel,” you purred and he immediately did what you asked. Your gaze slid from his dark eyes to his lips and it took everything from him not to kiss you right now.

He leaned down and instead gently kissed your heated cheek, leaving a wet spot on your soft skin. With a whimper you wrapped your legs around his waist and started grinding your hips, chasing your orgasm by rubbing your little clit against his pubic bone.

“Do ya wanna come, sweetheart?

“Only if you want me to, Joel,” you breathed out and he furrowed his brows, reminded of the nature of your relationship.

“ ‘course I do.”

With that he pulled away from you and sat up on his knees between your sweaty thighs. “Let me…,” he pulled out and you whined.

“Oh, baby, so impatient.”

You bit your lip with a sly smile but Joel quickly wiped it off your face when he took the condom off and asked,

“Can I slap your pretty pussy with my cock, sweetheart?” He gripped his cock at the base, squeezing it a little to postpone his climax and when you whispered a sultry ‘yes’ he slapped your clit with the tip of his throbbing length.

“Oh my god, Joel!” you cried out with a jerk, looking up at him with your brows pulled together and eyes rolling back.

“You like it?” He asked and when you nodded he started slapping your pulsating bud with his cock again and again until he saw some slick, seeping out of your clenching hole. He rubbed his red tip against it, coating his manhood with your juices, and began grinding it between your folds. His tip was bumping into your clit rhythmically and your taut muscles told him that you were close to your climax.

“Come for me, baby, please,” he asked softly and slapped your clit one more time. A jolt of pleasure made you shut your eyes and a loud moan escaped your lips. Wanting to prolong your orgasm and chasing his, Joel pressed his tip to your clit with his hand and started thrusting his cock, rubbing your twitching clit and at the same time massaging his whole length against your soft pussy and his own palm.

The overwhelming sensation, your sweet sounds and the sight of you coming in his bed made him explode and he began spurting creamy ropes of cum on your belly and sternum. He growled when a few drops landed on your bouncing breasts.

When you both stilled and the ecstasy started dissipating he sat down on his heels and watched you for a few seconds.

Joel wanted to remember that image- you, beautiful and satisfied, eyes shut, chest and belly heaving, was splayed on his bed, body glistening with sweat and cum. The happiness soon mixed with regret and the feeling of longing for more, wishing you were really truly his tightened his chest. But the reality was cruel. You didn’t need a single father in your life, you were free and your whole life was ahead of you.

Your curious gaze interrupted his thoughts.

“What are you thinking about, Joel?” You asked with a warm smile.

“I'm thinking my bed has never looked better than now.”

Your smile turned into a grin and you started to sit up but Joel stopped you with a raised hand.

“Let me clean you up, sweetheart.”

He went to the bathroom to get a wet towel and then gently wiped away his cum off your skin.

Before you left, he hugged you, breathing in the scent of your hair one more time and you gave him a soft kiss on the cheek.

You kept seeing each other for another month. Joel preferred his place to hotels and whenever he had the house for himself and got enough spare money, he would text you. In his own home it was easier to imagine you as his girlfriend, or even wife. He knew that it wasn’t healthy and he was getting a little delusional but it made him happy to think that you were his. If only in his dreams.

Sometimes Joel would literally dream about you. He’d wake up hard, yearning for your touch, your lips on his body, your gentle fingers running through his hair. It was easy to imagine you there with him. His hand would pump his needy cock and the image of you behind his eyelids was enough to make him come, groaning into his pillow.

As time passed Joel got more confident in expressing his desires. The possibilities were endless and you always looked excited whenever he suggested trying something new.

Like the time your eyes glinted with mischief when he asked if he could edge you the next time. Just the idea of making you beg for a climax made him rock hard. So during your next session he had you tied to his bed, as you were whimpering and pleading for a release, a vibrator in his hand pressed to your puffy clit. Though he caved in quite fast and finished you off with his thick fingers massaging your core, his teasing made you squirt and Joel lapped it all up with the wildest eyes and an aching cock. You returned the favor by drinking him till the last drop after he shoved his cock down your throat keeping you in place with his hands clutching your hair.

He loved experimenting with you, loved being rougher. But more often he craved making love to you, wanted you softly purring under his big body, as his cock was buried deep inside your heat, your pussy fluttering around him. He still couldn’t kiss you but your neck, your breasts, your cheeks were enough for him. Yet he couldn’t deny it— he was down bad for you.

“What is it, baby?” Joel asked you, pulling away from your neck that he was peppering with open mouth kisses a moment ago.

You were sitting on his lap, wearing a pretty summer dress and his only thought was to tear it off you but when his hands started roaming your body, you jerked and sniffed.

“Nothing. Everything’s ok, Joel,” you replied softly and nuzzled his neck. He knew something was wrong and you were hiding your pretty face. During the time he had known you, he learnt to read your body language and even feel your mood. So Joel stopped his ministrations immediately and kissed the top of your head.

“You can tell me, sweetheart. If you want.”

For a few minutes, he was holding you in his arms, rubbing your forearm with his thumb. Finally you took a deep breath, not raising your head off his shoulder, and opened up.

“I had a session with a new client yesterday. It was horrible.”

As soon as he heard your soft voice, saying that, his insides burned.

“Who? What did he do to you?”

He took your chin between his fingers and tilted your head up to face him.

When he saw tears in your eyes, he immediately wanted to rip that asshole apart. But your expression told him that you needed him to be gentle, to be there with you and he wanted to give you that.

“He was really degrading. Clients want it sometimes but it hadn’t been discussed and the things he said— made me feel like a cheap hooker. He didn’t hurt me though,” you added hastily but Joel saw that he had. Not physically but that fucker had made you really upset.

“I should talk some sense into the asshole. Can you give me his name?”

“No, no,” you were shaking your head, “I can’t. It’s all confidential. I’ll get over it and won’t see him again of course.”

You took a deep breath before mumbling,

“I’m sorry for ruining the mood.”

Then you reached for his belt buckle but Joel’s hand stopped you and he placed your hands between his big palms.

“No, you’re not in the mood. It’s ok. Can we just cuddle?

“But— I will be in a second. I’m professional, Joel.” You shot him almost a fiery glance and pouted your lips.

“Hey, baby, your client here—,” Joel pointed a thumb at himself with raised eyebrows and a sly smile, “wants to role play a big spoon tonight. Can we do that?”

“You’re so kinky”, you said with a giggle and lay down on the bed. In a second he was holding you, his chest pressed to your back, his strong arms embracing you, giving you comfort.

He was semi hard and surely you noticed it. He felt the warmth of your skin through the thin material of your dress and it drove him insane but the way you flinched at his touch, your tears, your shaky voice told him you wanted him to just hold you. For the second time you fell asleep in his arms and he woke you up with a kiss on your soft cheek the next morning.

Another month passed. As weird as it might have sounded, you became a huge part of his life. He knew every crevice, every curve of your body, knew every hope and dream. He kissed every spot on you, except for your beautiful lips. He tasted them a million times in his imagination but with time it stopped being enough. So he decided to invite you to celebrate his birthday with his family and the closest friends and finally ask you out on a real date.

Joel was nervous when you stepped into his house that day. Tommy raised his eyebrows, surprised to see you there, but fortunately didn’t ask or say anything. You seemed anxious as well at first, but after introducing you to everyone, Joel was happy to notice you chatting with the other guests, giggling with Sarah about something and when his daughter pulled you upstairs to show you her drawings, warmth spread in his chest. He was glad and relieved that you two got along. He wasn’t looking for a mother for his child, he would never ask you to take such a responsibility, but it was important to him that you two could be friends.

Just before dessert you asked him if you could talk privately. Tommy gave Joel a wink, lips twisted in a smirk, when you two headed upstairs, and the older brother just rolled his eyes.

When you stepped into Joel’s bedroom, his cock twitched in his jeans. It was a Pavlovian reflex at this point. He was used to seeing you there naked, your gorgeous body wriggling in his bed, whimpers and moans escaping your mouth.

But Joel told himself to calm down when you came up to him with a serious expression on your pretty face.

“Joel…,” you started and dropped your eyes, fumbling with your fingers.

“Yes, baby?” His heart started pounding in his chest. Always calm and self assured you seemed really nervous and the change scared him. What if you decided to break off whatever weird relationship you two had, what if…

You interrupted his thoughts when you raised your face to him and a little shy smile tugged at your lips.

“I want to give you your birthday present.”

He opened his mouth to say that you hadn’t have to do it, seeing you there was enough but he paused when you inched closer, your big sparkling eyes staring right into his soul. Then your gaze slid down to his lips and Joel seemed to stop breathing. He felt your palms on his forearms and then you slightly pressed your lips to his. They were barely there at first, hesitant, waiting for him to react.

He had been imagining that moment, dreaming of it for so long, so his hands immediately flew to your waist and he pressed his body closer to yours, welcoming your kiss with his whole being.

Joel’s lips started moving against yours, gently and slowly as if he was afraid to scare you away, to ruin the moment. But when he heard you sigh happily against him and your body relaxed into his, Joel wrapped his arms tightly around your torso. He wished that moment to last forever, wanted to never have to let you go.

His tongue brushed your lower lip, asking for permission to breach the last divide between you two, and you graced him by opening your mouth and letting him taste you fully. His tongue was caressing yours while his hands were gliding over your back. Then Joel gently cupped your cheek and tilted his head to give you the best kiss he could. You were so sweet and soft, so warm and lovely on his tongue and he didn’t care that you could probably feel his cock swell against your belly. Your ability to make him hard in seconds was not a secret to the both of you and he bucked his hips against your body with a soft groan.

Joel felt your smile on his lips and playfully squeezed your ass cheeks.

You giggled, your mouth parting from his.

“Happy birthday, Joel,” you whispered, putting your head on his shoulder and nuzzling his neck.

“Thank you for the best birthday present, baby.”

Joel kissed your forehead and you fluttered your eyes shut with a happy smile.

“Sweetheart?” he called.

“Yes.”

“Will you have dinner with me?”

You lifted your head and your eyes locked.

“Like— on a date?”

“Yes.”

Your lips twisted into the widest grin he’d seen on you and you nodded.

“Really?” he asked, making sure that he was really that lucky, “Fuck, I know I’m not a catch. My life is chaotic and I’m a single dad and…”

“Shh,” you placed your finger on his lips and said softly, “I’d love to date you, Joel Miller.”

Joel beamed at you and embraced you in a tight hug.

“I quit escort,” you murmured against his chest and Joel furrowed his brows.

“Is it because of me? Sweetheart, I’d never ask you to quit your job. If you like it I won’t …”

“I don’t. I don’t like it anymore. After that guy I realized I wanna do something else.”

“Ok. Whatever you decide, baby,” he said and then added with a little smile, “I can still pay you though.”

You laughed at him and playfully punched his shoulder. “Shut up, Joel.”

He took your face between his big palms, marveling at your beautiful face, and whispered, “You know how to shut me up, baby.”

You smiled and pressed your lips to his.

Joel opened his eyes to see the early morning sun peeking through the blinds and your face twisted in pleasure just before his. He soon realized that your wet warm pussy was wrapped around his hard cock and you were slowly grinding against him, lying on your side, face to face, your leg thrown over his waist.

He moaned at the sudden pleasure and you noticed that he was up.

“I’m sorry for waking you up, honey. I just— I wanted you so much I couldn’t stop myself.”

You were breathing heavily and he wrapped his arms around your naked body and began rolling his hips, helping you to reach your high and chasing his.

“Never apologize for this, baby. I woke up in heaven thanks to you.”

You smiled and kissed him while his hand slithered between your slightly sweaty bodies and he slid his thumb between your folds to stroke your hardened clit. He was swallowing your moans and tried to get his own ecstatic growling under control, not wishing to wake up Sarah.

Soon you both exploded in each other’s arms and Joel flooded your pussy with his warm cum while you were writhing and trembling with euphoria against him.

When your climax subsided, you rested your head on his shoulder. He was drawing patterns on your back until you lifted your head to give him one more kiss.

“Sarah wanted pancakes for breakfast. I’m gonna go make some batter,” you said, getting out of bed and putting on your robe.

“I’ll help you. Be up in a minute.”

You smiled at him and bent over to give him a peck on the cheek but he swiftly pulled you back into his embrace, searching for your lips. You giggled and soon melted into his arms, while he was kissing you, passion and love in every stroke of his lips and tongue.

You were his, fully and completely, and all the fears evaporated when he realized that you were the final puzzle, missing from his life. He would do anything to make you happy.

“I love you,” Joel whispered against your lips.

“I love you too,” you murmured back.

Thank you for reading! Please comment and reblog if you enjoyed the fic, it motivates me to write more stories for you, lovelies!❤️

Masterlist

General tag list: @milla-frenchy @harriedandharassed @iamasaddie @nervousmumbling @bbyanarchist @stevie75 @puduvallee @auteurdelabre @mountainsandmayhem @senoratess @flamingochick55 @theoraekenslover @schnarfer @mermaidgirl30 @staywildflowahchild @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @evolnoomym @keylimebeag @fruityreads @joelmillerisapunk

If you'd like to be tagged in my future fics, let me know!💕

[songbirdseung]

happy accidents / park jongseong

synopsis: maybe getting hit by a basketball wasn't so bad?

pairing: jay x reader

warnings: injuries?

wc: 1k

Your solo trip to the park did not go as expected when you felt a sudden pain in your back. Ignoring the fact that your drink fell from your hand and almost ruined the white maxi skirt you were wearing, you turned towards the direction you assumed the ball came from.

"I'm so sorry, my friend is a clumsy idiot," a voice called out.

"Jake, shut up!" another male voice responded before facing you and apologizing for hitting you. "Basketball isn't really my thing, I'm more into guitars."

You blinked, still processing the pain and the sudden chaos. The guy who had spoken was now standing in front of you, looking genuinely apologetic. He had a warm, approachable aura that somehow made the whole situation less frustrating.

"It's okay," you managed to say, trying to smile despite the discomfort in your back. "Accidents happen."

Jake and another friend, who you assumed was Sunghoon, jogged over, both looking equally concerned. Jake had a sheepish grin on his face, while Sunghoon looked more serious.

"Are you alright?" Sunghoon asked, glancing at you with worry.

"Yeah, I'll be fine," you replied, waving off their concern. "Just a bit startled, that's all."

Extending his hand. "I'm Jay, by the way. Sorry again for that."

You shook his hand, feeling a bit more at ease. "I'm Y/N. And it's really okay, Jay."

Jake stepped forward, looking at the fallen drink. "Can we at least get you another drink to make up for it?"

You nodded, appreciating their efforts to make amends. "That would be nice, thank you."

As the four of you walked towards the park's cafe, you couldn't help but notice how easy it was to talk to them. Jay, in particular, had a relaxed demeanor that made you feel comfortable despite the awkward start.

"So, guitars, huh?" you asked, looking at Jay.

He chuckled, nodding. "Yeah, I've been playing for a few years now. Basketball is just something I do for fun with these guys."

"He's actually pretty good with a guitar," Jake added, nudging Jay playfully. "You should hear him sometime."

"Maybe I will," you said, smiling at Jay. "If you're not too busy accidentally hitting people with basketballs, that is."

Jay laughed, shaking his head. "I'll try to keep my basketball skills in check."

As you all reached the cafe, you realized that what started as a mishap had turned into a pleasant encounter. You got your new drink, and the conversation flowed easily among the four of you.

As the four of you sat at a small outdoor table at the park's cafe, the conversation continued to flow easily. You found yourself increasingly drawn to Jay's warm smile and easygoing personality. The initial awkwardness from the basketball incident had melted away, replaced by laughter and shared stories.

"So, Y/N, what brings you to the park today?" Jay asked, leaning forward with genuine interest.

"I was just taking a solo trip to enjoy the nice weather and watch the swans by the river," you replied, glancing in the direction of the serene water where you'd been earlier. "It's one of my favorite spots to relax."

Jay nodded, his eyes following yours. "I get that. Sometimes, you just need a peaceful place to unwind."

Jake and Sunghoon excused themselves to get refills, leaving you and Jay alone at the table. The air between you felt charged with a new energy, the kind that comes with the potential of something more than just a chance encounter.

Jay cleared his throat, breaking the silence. "You know, I really am sorry about earlier. I hope it didn't ruin your day."

You shook your head, smiling. "Not at all. Actually, it turned out to be a lot better than I expected, thanks to you guys."

Jay's face lit up with a smile. "I'm glad to hear that. Maybe we could hang out more often. You know, when I'm not accidentally hitting you with basketballs."

You laughed, feeling a warmth spread through you. "I'd like that. Maybe you can even show me some of your guitar skills."

Jay's eyes sparkled with excitement. "Deal. How about we exchange numbers? That way, I can let you know when we have a less hazardous hangout planned."

You both pulled out your phones, quickly exchanging numbers. As you saved his contact, you couldn't help but feel a flutter of excitement at the thought of seeing him again.

Jake and Sunghoon returned with their drinks, and you all spent a bit more time chatting before deciding to head your separate ways. As you walked back through the park with Jay, the conversation continued to flow effortlessly.

"You know, I wasn't kidding about the guitar," Jay said, glancing at you. "I really would like to play for you sometime."

"I'd love that," you replied, looking up at him. "And maybe you can teach me a thing or two."

Jay's smile widened. "It's a date, then."

As you reached the park entrance, Jay turned to you with a sincere expression. "I had a great time today, Y/N. I'm really glad we met, even if it was because of my terrible aim."

"Me too, Jay," you said, feeling your cheeks warm. "Today turned out to be pretty amazing."

Before you could part ways, Jay hesitated and then spoke up. "Actually, do you mind if I walk you home? Just to make sure you get there safely."

Before you could respond, Jake and Sunghoon, who had been lingering nearby, burst into laughter. "Aww, look at Jay, being all protective," Jake teased, nudging Sunghoon.

"Yeah, make sure she gets home safe, lover boy," Sunghoon added with a grin.

Jay rolled his eyes but couldn't hide his smile. "Cut it out, you two."

You laughed, appreciating their playful banter. "I'd love for you to walk me home, Jay. Thanks."

With a final wave to Jake and Sunghoon, you and Jay started walking in the direction of your home. As you strolled through the streets, the conversation flowed easily, and you found yourself feeling more and more comfortable around him.

As you approached your building, Jay turned to you with a soft smile. "Here we are."

"Thanks again for walking me home," you said, feeling a bit shy.

Jay shrugged, his smile warm. "Anytime. I had a great time today, Y/N."

"Me too," you replied. "See you soon?"

"Definitely," Jay said, giving you a wave as he started to walk away. "Goodnight, Y/N."

"Goodnight, Jay," you called after him, watching as he disappeared down the street.

As you closed the door behind you, you couldn't help but smile. Today had turned out far better than you could have imagined, and you were already looking forward to your next meeting with Jay.

[bluedew]

what should you do in your specific situation? 🍎

if you can't already tell i'm on summer break and i have a lot of time to analyze my own feelings, and to do my hobbies, so there might be more pac readings coming up! i hope this resonates and you feel up to it feel free to give me feedback. i cannot guarantee that this will resonate with everyone or match everyone's situation, so please forgive me if i am wrong.

PILE 1.

hmmm....for you i'm getting mixed answers. what you really have to ask yourself is if this is what you truly want to do, whatever you're thinking of doing? if you knew that there's a better situation ahead would you be chasing after the second-best one? you don't realize your worth and that's why you try to grab at anything that gives you the slightest glance. analyze your wants, if you really want to do this, if it's going to be most beneficial to YOU. there's a thing called self-love; if you keep ignoring it because you want to make other people like you, both you and others will not like you. be yourself; you're charming, but when you try to be a people-pleaser it erases your beauty.

PILE 2.

whatever situation this is, it's going to work out for you, but you have to release all worries and anxieties about it. it will come in time, my love, but you cannot keep chipping away at your beautiful soul while waiting for it to arrive. you don't have to try hard to get your way in this situation, because what you need is already on the way. you're probably a very anxious person, maybe a depressed one, and right now you need to focus on THAT instead of this specific situation. being detail-oriented isn't helpful in this time.

PILE 3.

say what you mean!! that's what i'm getting for this pile. i think you're a very vocal person but sometimes you get stuck and are unable to voice your thoughts, your opinions. even if it's talking to yourself in the mirror, or talking to someone who you trust, you HAVE to talk. it'll straighten out the situation and you'll know what to do by then. sometimes we just need to let our words echo into the world and then everything becomes clear as glass. for some of you, if you're worried about being the 'villain' or 'disliked' in whatever situation you're stuck in, most people aren't idiots. everyone will not hate you, and if they do they do not know you fully and should not judge you. many people adore you already, and those are the ones you have to keep in your life.

[mildlyromanticperv]

What took you so long?

MReader x Eunha fluff. Friends to lovers.

-Hey, you. -You call out for your best friend Eunha after arranging going out to watch a movie.

-Hey! -Her unwavering excitement and cuteness fills your heart with joy, like every time she smiles.

-You ready? We need to go fast, the movie starts in 15...

-Yep! Actually, I called a cab, it should be here any second... -She looks around waiting to see that yellow car, not long after it appears around the corner.

Upon entering and providing the directions you remain silent looking outside the window, lost in thought as your imagination runs wild on how will your best friend react when you finally say it, when you finally confess.

-Hey, you're quieter than usual, is everything okay? -Her sweet voice brings you back to reality as she places a hand on your shoulder.

-Yeah, I'm fine, work is just too much sometimes and I didn't get enough sleep. -You chuckle slightly trying to brush off the anxiety that you're feeling, certainly there's no good time to speak of your feelings...

During the silent car ride, Eunha can't help but feel uncomfortable, she's used to your bickering and unending yapping of your work or love life, or precisely the lack of it, drowned in worries she gets closer and covers your hand with hers.

-Look, sweetie, you can trust me, whatever's going on you know you can talk to me, right?

If you would have to create a scale from 1 to 10 grading the levels of blushing, you'd certainly be at 11 at that very moment feeling her soft hand and tender caress, she clearly worries, she is clearly caring for you.

-I'm fine, Eunha, for real, it's so cute of you to worry about me but I promise, I'm fine. -The way she looks at you with so much worry just melts your heart, even when through your mind hundreds of thoughts of insecurity and doubt clouds your judgement... Despite the fake smile you put up she smiles back.

-Okay I'll take your word for it but you better be telling me the truth, mister. -She crosses her arms and pouts playfully.

Not really paying attention to what just happened you two arrive at the nearby mall ready to spend the next two hours sitting in awe to the last Avenger's move you two are completely fans of.

Despite what people usually say, spending this much time together with your crush is not that bad, even though in your heart you feel like there's no future... Are moments like these the ones that make it all worth it, or at least that's what you thought all this time, it's what you thought until she closed the gap between you two after coming out of the cinema.

-God! Why are all cinema rooms so freaking cold!

-It's your fault for coming in such a cute dress. -You laughed at her reaction clearly amused and enjoying her closeness, despite her annoyed pout she smacks your arm murmuring "idiot", but in a playful way.

-I'm glad you came with me, Eunha, I know your sisters probably didn't want you to come alone with me... -You chuckle nervously.

-Nah it's fine, they're like that but because they're sure you like me. -Eunha says this without thinking and without expecting that her words would make her blush so hard... Why is this happening? Does she really like her best friend? Should she take the next step?

Her silence worries your heart, it's unlike her to become quiet all of a sudden and it's rarer to see her blush at her sisters teasing... Could it be...?

-Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something, why don't we go get some coffee? -Your reassuring smile sends a warm wave through her body, returning the confidence and her smile.

-Sure, but you don't have to be so cryptic, idiot... -Her usual self comes back as she pokes your cheek protesting.

Some time later...

"This is it." You thought, the time has come finally, is it now or never...

"Either you speak up or you'll lose him forever." The thought crossed her mind when you two finally sat down at the coffee shop and the silence covers you both.

-Eunha... -You're the one to speak first, a billion ways to tell her your feelings cross your mind and none of them is the way you had it planned. -I like you. -Is the only thing you blurted out after feeling everything at once, after all this time...

-I like you too. -Her words come like a bucket of cold water, you open your eyes as much as you can and gasp in full on shock when you hear her words.

Silence falls between you two.

Ten, fifteen, thirty seconds fly by feeling like an eternity...

-You really mean it?

-Yes, Eunha, I really mean it... Since always, I haven't been able to think of anyone but you. -You finally get the courage to look at her in the eyes. -I really like you.

Your heart starts to swell and ache at the sight of her tears coming down, you never thought such simple words would hurt her that way...

-I'm glad. -She says between tears. -Because I didn't know how to tell you either, I was afraid that once I told you our friendship... Us... Would end.

Maybe it's the influence of all the romantic novels and shows you used to watch alone, maybe it's the hero complex you developed when you were a kid, but without giving it a second thought you decided to stand up and quickly rest one knee on the ground while cleaning her tears.

-There's no way in hell I'm going to let us end. Especially now that I know that you feel the same way for me as I feel for you. -The soothing feeling of your hand running through her cheek makes this moment a million times better for her, your eyes meet as the emotions flow out like a stream. Despite the lack of words you are encountering in a bubble, where only you two exist... Where nothing else matters.

Where you two can finally be together.

-What took you so long to tell me? -She asks, the sheer raw happiness pouring out of her every word pierces through your heart making it beat faster and faster, rendering you unable to answer for a couple of seconds.

-I don't know, I seriously don't know! But... -You take a deep breath to collect the last bit of courage you need to take the leap, the final stretch, to kiss her. -But I'm done holding back.

Right at that moment you cup both of her cheeks to hold her into place, you quickly lean forward meeting her lips for the first time and even though it's a rash decision, you make sure your every movement is accurate, precise, filled with emotions.

Her lips respond to your touch dancing freely and hungrily as she returns the kiss with equal passion, she closes her eyes to savour every single second of this intense exchange, remembering every fold, every corner, every inch of you...

The time has finally come.

You two are finally together.

There's no stopping now.

-I love you. -She says after finally being able to convince herself she could live a couple of seconds without your lips and your touch.

-I love you too, Eunha.

[owlespresso]

dogged pursuit. mr dr sir veritas ratio. p4 of ? / part 1, part 2, part 3 summary: you've been appointed as the bodyguard of one doctor veritas ratio after a failed attempt on his life. he's easy to get along with, so long as you learn when to plug your ears and focus on his washboard abs. tags: mentioned violence but nothing huge

It was bound to happen at some point. You’d been hired because someone tried to put their hands on him, and it was assumed that they—or someone else silly enough to nurture a grudge against him, would try again. In hindsight, you should have seen it coming. 

“Is there nothing in that head of yours!? You could have been killed!” his voice cracks across the living room. He’s pacing back and forth in front of the chair where you’re splayed out, limbs hanging off the arm like a bendy willow’s branches.

“Awh, Doc, were you worried about me?” you drawled. You’re not sure what he’s talking about. There might be a few, smarting bruises on your ribs from the scuffle, but you’d done your job. 

There had been a yacht excursion earlier today—one he’d practically been forced to attend because someone important to his project was there. You’re not sure of the specifics of what happened yourself. They were rabble rousers dressed in IPC uniforms who sneaked aboard. The identities of the perpetrators will be sorted out by the folks in charge and handed to you later. All you know is that they’d been trying to put their hands on him. And now, some of them don’t have hands at all.

If anything, you’ve been worried that your display of excessive violence frightened him. He’s been clammed up the whole walk back. The kind of quiet that typically preludes a massive scolding—but this time was different. He hadn’t even looked at you. The  absence of that broiling glare worried you more than the glare itself ever has.

His mouth balls up, like he’s trying to keep the emotion off his face.

Though you often say you know he can take care of himself, that you know he’s a capable fighter himself—sometimes you really do forget. He moves fast, too fast for your weary eyes to track, and those big hands clap on either side of your face. He smushes your cheeks as he ducks into your space, leveling you with the meanest look you've ever seen.

“Of course I was worried! They were armed, you blithering idiot! With rudimentary weapons—but weapons nonetheless! What were you thinking, engaging them hand-to-hand!?” he seethes, and all you can do is stare at him, hapless and helpless as he continues. “When will you get it through your thick skull that I want you alive!?”

You sit up, resting your clenched hands on your thighs, spine ramrod straight as he chews you out. You’ve never had a wife, before, or a mother, but you imagine this is what it feels like to be scolded by either one. He stands above you, his arm crossed. There’s a visible tick to his brow, and a twitch to his eye that you haven’t seen since another IPC representative spilled a mojito all over his expensive silk shirt. 

“You… care about me,” you repeated, blinking slowly at him.

He huffs, looking thoroughly put out. “Did you think I wished you dead? I don't know where you got the impression that I'm such a heartless monster—but I do... care. About all forms of life. I don't think it's a very far reach to say that no one should be stabbed to death and left to bleed out. Especially while surrounded by such insufferable company. Knowing them, they would only complain about how the blood has stained their suits—"

The gears in your head churn, slow as molasses. Memories filter through your hazy headspace, watery and floating, like motes of dust in the afternoon sun. Veritas always having a cup of coffee ready for you in the morning. Veritas herding you off the couch and into the second bedroom, barking at you to get a good night’s sleep. Veritas. Veritas. Veritas.

“Doc,” you say, voice trembling. He leans in. His expression softens, his brows wrinkling with concern. “I think we have to get married.”

It’s almost comical, how quick his face flattens. His hands collapse back to his side as he turns away, heading towards the staircase in long, brisk strides. 

You cry out and fling yourself after him, fingers catching the tail ends of flowing, pearlescent robes. Pride be damned, you’re not letting him go after that admission—getting him to talk about his feelings is like prying teeth, unless it has anything to do with his mission statement. Something has shifted between the two of you, your dynamic changes irrevocably by his impassioned declaration. You want to see him make that face again—the one on the boat, when he’d watched you get hit in the gut. His eyes had gone real wide, face almost blank with surprise.

You want to see him make all sorts of faces. The days where all he shows you is that same, stony countenance far gone. 

“Wait, wait! I’ll be more careful, I promise!” you wail, clinging onto the ends of his robe.

“You—!” he fumes, pulling at the fabric. He shuffles around, his brows furrowed and lips pulled into a thin, straight line. He looks at you like that, real stern, for a few more seconds before the wind seems to wane from his sails. His shoulders slump. “Instead of a knife, it could have been a gun, or any projectile weapon that could have incapacitated you before you even reached them.” He says, combing his fingers through his hair. It’s already tousled from the wind out on the seas. He does this whenever he’s nervous, you realize, and wonder just how much there is of him to explore. “Get up. And get changed. There’s blood all over your sleeves. The leather’s already ruined.” He grouses. 

He bends over and his robes shift with the motion, providing you a glance at his other nipple, firm and rosy. Your mouth waters. Your brain feels like it’s about to melt out of your skull.

His hand wraps around your wrist, long fingers clutching you tight as he draws you to your feet. It’s almost completely unaided. Effortless. A look of the power packed within those flexing muscles. 

“Now go,” your awe-inspired reverie is cut short as he releases you. He snatches his hands back from your person and gives them a cursory look over. “This is a rental. I don’t want you staining the upholstery.”

“Psh. You just wanna see me out of this jacket, don’t ya?” you sneer, poking his calf with the tip of your boot. You oblige him anyways. The black leather crumples to the pale wooden floor in a heap. Your boots, at his insistence, are placed next to the door, right up against the wall. “That good enough? It’s pretty hot today. I could stand to lose a few more layers.” It’s not your intention to be this incorrigible. Old habits are hard to kick, especially when he always gives you such animated reactions.

He lifts his head, probably just to look down his nose at you. “Do as you please,” he says. He pauses, hesitating, before letting loose another great sigh. “But you have to sit down and rest. You may not be hurting now, but the adrenaline won’t last forever. So wash off and make yourself comfortable now, while you still can, before the pain sets in—”

He continues to rattle on. You half-listen, more than happy to bask in his attention while you watch his lips move.

[dominimoonbeam]

Practice Makes Perfect - 9

the non-magical college au continues!!!

this chapter is milo/sweetheart and huxley/gavin with a special unwanted guest appearance...

fic from the steamy steamy start on ao3.

tags: idiots in love, flirting, communication, non-magical, kody being kody,

Practice Makes Perfect - 9

One Month Later

Sweetheart walked into the study hall of the library, telling themself that Milo probably wouldn’t show up. He might be late even if he did.

They’d told themself that every time they got together in the last month to work on this project. This was the fifth. He had never not shown up and he had never been late when they set a time. So why did they expect him not to show? Why did they prepare themself for the disappointment?

Maybe, the better question would be why they’d feel so disappointed if he didn’t show up…

When they got into the hall, they spotted him at their favorite table, text book open and fingers dancing across the keyboard of his laptop.

Their heart pounded. There was something dangerous about Milo Greer.

He looked up and spotted them across the room, his face turning from serious and focused to bright and excited all at once. All because he saw them.

They’d told themself a dozen things to make up for why he was being nice to them, but none of them were true or fair and Sweetheart knew it. He was smart and a great project partner. He wasn’t using them to get a good grade and this wasn’t some elaborate joke.

He pulled the seat out next to him when they neared, rearranging the material on the table to give them space and invite them to take a look at what he had so far.

“Hey,” Milo said, voice a little above a whisper. They were allowed to talk in the study hall but something about the atmosphere still kept everyone’s voices low. “Here.” He put one of the two coffee cups he had in front of them.

Sweetheart hated the blush they felt blooming across their face. He did that too. He brought them their coffee order when they met up early. The first couple times he’d texted to let them know he was grabbing their coffees on his way. And he said it like that. Like it was a totally normal thing to do. Like they were a duo.

Sweetheart was not used to being a duo. Or a team. Or anything. They were just them, on their own, handling shit. And they were good at it. They’d been packing their own lunches since they were eight and forging parent signatures since ten. No one took care of Sweetheart but Sweetheart.

But he pushed out their chair every time and put their coffee in front of them like it was the only normal thing to do. Like he’d done it a hundred times before.

He didn’t even text about the coffee anymore. It was routine.

They settled down into the seat next to him, nodding as he explained the progress he’d made, definitely not taking deeper breaths of the cloud of bodywash around him…

They rearranged the material on the table, adding their own and setting up their laptop.

It was all too easy to settle into work together. Sometimes they even finished what they’d planned on the project and started working on other school work, from different classes, but still sitting together.

Last week they’d gone to lunch after studying. Milo’s stomach had started making rumbling sounds and he’d apologized and said he missed breakfast. Sweetheart had shocked themself by rolling their eyes and packing up, insisting they move to a café so he doesn’t faint. And they had. They’d spent another four hours in the café, at first still studying and then just…hanging out.

What the hell was this?

“So, there’s this party this weekend,” Milo started.

Sweetheart continued to type next to him. They huffed something affirmative. Yes, the party. They’d heard. Another frat thing.

“I was thinking this time I could drive you there as well as home…”

Sweetheart hit three wrong keys and stared. The ride home on his motorcycle had been exciting, arms wrapped around his waist, wearing his helmet…

They looked at Milo.

He smiled, something nervous about it. “It could be fun and we can bail whenever you want.” His smile grew. “We can find a corner and read if you want.”

They rolled their eyes and pressed their lips to keep his smile from spreading. “Do you really think I’m that anti-social?”

“No. I think you’re that opposed to wasting time on social events,” he reworded, laughing and rolling his pen between his fingers the way he did sometimes.

Sweetheart nodded. No point in arguing that. “So, wouldn’t me going just ruin it?”

Milo laughed. “Are you kidding? No. I bet you’re great at beer pong.”

“Why would you think I’d be good at that?”

He shrugged. “Because you’re good at everything. And, I mean, you wouldn’t lose to me, would you?”

Sweetheart wrinkled their nose. “Of course not.”

He grinned. “See.”

Sweetheart felt heat in their face again and pretended to read their notes. “I don’t know. Last time wasn’t much fun.”

Milo nodded. “Yeah, but last time you didn’t go with me. I promise to either make sure it’s fun or take you home if it sucks. I’ll be your party guide!”

Sweetheart raised a skeptical eyebrow. “Why?”

Milo stared back at them. “Why what, Sweets?”

They shivered a little when he used that nickname. “Why would you want to play party guide to me? Isn’t the point of those things so you can find someone to hook up with?”

Milo blushed.

Sweetheart stared. It was pretty and made their pulse race a little.

Milo turned in his seat to face them better, touching the back of their chair. “Sweets… I don’t want to hook up with anyone. I want to go with you. Do you… want to go with me?”

He was watching them, waiting, his expression so open and patient that their whole heart ached.

Dangerous.

Milo Greer was dangerous.

Sweetheart nodded. “Okay.”

His smile was so beautiful. “I’ll pick you up at eight?”

Sweetheart frowned to hide the excitement that ran through their veins. They could walk. They could just meet him there. “Sure. Sounds good.”

-

“I heard you’re fucking that himbo.”

The class had ended and most of the other students had already filed out. Most, but not all. A few jerked at Kody’s words, casting glances back to Gavin before giggling and whispering to each other.

Gavin did not usually mind whispers.

He blinked innocently. No, he wasn’t fucking a himbo. He wasn’t fucking anyone. In fact, he might be setting a new personal record for celibacy. It had been like… a week. Gavin hadn’t really thought about it until then. Strange. It wasn’t that they’d talked about it. They weren’t even dating or anything. They were friends. And just thinking that—that they were actually friends—made Gavin’s stomach flutter.

And then he remembered who he was talking to and put on his sharpest grin. “What the fuck are you on about now, water boy?”

Kody frowned at the nickname but only for a second. He’d never liked it, especially since it harkened back to that first art project he did. It was lazy. Water in glasses and a bunch of talk about meaning. Gavin got the sense that Kody had been able to impress with all that talk and little skill until they met. “Huxley,” he rolled the name and Gavin’s arm twitched, resisting the urge to smack it out of his mouth. That was an interesting impulse… “You should get a trophy for that one, Gav. I think half the school has tried to climb that mountain…”

Gavin didn’t like this. His stomach twisted. Kody had always talked like this and he had never really liked it but… this felt different. “We’re not sleeping together,” he said. He wasn’t sure he’d ever said those words before. Firstly, because it wasn’t usually true, and secondly because he never felt the need to explain his sex life to anyone.

Kody laughed. “Yeah right. You’re spending every minute with him. It’s definitely not for his brain…”

Gavin started packing his bag, hands shaking. “We’re friends. That’s it.” He tried to make it sound like it was less even though it was so much more than any sexual relationship he’d had before. But he didn’t like the way Kody was talking about Huxley, largely because he knew Huxley wouldn’t like it.

“I’ve heard he’s big,” Kody continued to tease, grinning like he was imagining it. “I guess if anyone could handle him, it would be you…”

Gavin huffed and shook his head, slinging his bag over his shoulder. If Kody was trying to get a reaction out of him, he could fuck right off. Gavin had no shame. Plenty had tried to coax him into a reaction or a fight. He didn’t care. He was unbaitable. He was impervious to—

“But since you’re done with him, I wouldn’t mind giving him another try…”

Gavin froze, fingers so tight around the strap of his bag against his chest that his bones ached. “Another?”

“You remember. I told you. At the start of the year…”

Gavin turned around to look at him, mind racing. He had told him? Told him what? What did Kody do?

Kody rolled his eyes. “You’re such an asshole.”

“What did you do?”

He blinked at him, surprised, and then slowly grinning. “Still going to pretend you’re not fucking the himbo?”

Gavin stared at him. Waiting, still trying to remember any time Kody had ever talked to him about Huxley before. At the start of the year?

Kody laughed, delighted now. “What? Worried I got there first? I knew you were just chasing him to show off. So, how was it planting your flag?” He rolled the words with innuendo, biting his lower lip as he thought on it.

Gavin felt a jolt up his spine he’d never known before. Rage? He wanted to scream at him to stop thinking it—stop imaging it! He wanted to knock the fantasy right out of the other man’s head.

His phone chimed in his pocket.

It could be anyone, but he knew it was Hux. They were supposed to meet up for lunch. They’d exchanged their schedules a couple weeks ago to find all the times they were both free. They caught meals together, studied together, and sometimes just walked each other from one class to the next.

Last weekend, Huxley had invited him over to watch a movie. Gavin was pretty sure it was the first time in his life that he’d ever seen a whole movie through to the end. They’d spent so much time together but he felt like he was still figuring Hux out. He was warm and kind and so damn funny. He wasn’t shy but sometimes he blushed. He wasn’t asexual, but he wasn’t making any moves either. Moving to a new city had been hard on him. He was social but somewhere along the way, he’d gotten the idea that he wasn’t wanted.

“Come on,” Kody egged, interpreting Gavin’s silence as holding out. “Did you make him whine? Did you bend that big, dumb—”

Gavin closed the distance fast enough to surprise both of them, collecting Kody’s shirt by the collar and slamming him up against the wall. Kody snarled and tried to shove him off but Gavin pressed hard, his thigh between Kody’s and his weight in the arm he had against his chest. It would look intimate to anyone that couldn’t see their faces. “What the fuck?” Kody grabbed his wrist, trying to pull it off his shirt.

Gavin had never been violent, not like this, not really. Oh, he’d played rough plenty, but that wasn’t the same. “Shut up,” Gavin snarled. “If I hear you say one more fucking thing about him, I will make you pay for it, water boy. This is your only warning.”

Kody stared and, whatever he saw in Gavin’s eyes, he let go of his wrist and held up both hands in mock surrender.

Gavin didn’t like the anger roiling in behind his gaze though. Kody liked to be the bully. He did not like to be pushed around. Gavin knew that, and it was why he enjoyed teasing him so much in the past—why he’d created this frenemy situation in the first place. But now? Now that it might come back on someone other than Gavin?

He rolled his eyes and tried to pretend he was only bored, not furious and disgusted, when he let go of Kody and walked away.

He stormed out of the classroom and nearly ran right into a big, broad chest.

“Woah,” Huxley caught his arms, smiling down at him in surprise. “There you are. What—” He cut himself off looking at Gavin, like he saw his mood on his face. His brow pinched. “Are you okay?” He looked past him toward the door he’d come out of.

Gavin twitched, suddenly horrified that Kody would see him—would get anywhere near him. “I’m good. I’m great. Come on.” He caught Huxley’s hand and started walking, towing the other man along down the hall and around the corner, toward the front doors of the building.

“Gav…” Huxley said, keeping pace with him easily but sounding skeptical. “What’s going on?”

Gavin pushed the door into a wide swing and breathed a little better when he was outside, descending the steps toward one of the many campus paths. “I had words with a classmate,” he said, honest but maybe not as honest as he should be. “I want to get out of there while I’ve still got the last one in, you know?”

Huxley’s hand squeezed his just as they were heading down one of the tree lined footpaths. “Someone’s giving you trouble?”

Gavin slowed, looking up at the other guy. He sounded equal parts worried and angry. Gavin’s heart beat a little faster and he realized he’d taken Huxley’s hand. He laughed a little, giving it a squeeze before letting go. “Sorry about that.”

Huxley shook his head. “It’s fine. Who was it?”

Gavin grinned. “Just a classmate. Artists argue.” He’d be damned if he was going to tell Huxley what it was about, or the shit Kody had said. “So, you don’t mind me holding your hand?”

Huxley frowned like he wasn’t sure about letting the first topic go, but the second was sneaking in, making him blush. “No. Of course not. I mean, if you don’t mind, why would I?”

Gavin shrugged, they were walking slower now. He bumped his arm into Huxley’s. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” He’d been careful about not being too touchy or flirty with Huxley when they started this friendship thing, but the better they got to know each other the more he realized Huxley was far from uncomfortable with contact. He offered hugs whenever they met up and Gavin was happy to take them. Fuck, he was a great hugger. And they’d been side by side on the couch on that movie night, always in contact, though Gavin had resisted getting handsy or pulling one of those thick thighs over his lap…

“Why would I be uncomfortable?” Huxley asked, wrinkling his nose in confusion.

Gavin considered if he should dig in or drop it…

“What?” Hux pressed, smiling nervously when Gavin cut another glance at him.

“Well… When we first met, I think I came on too strong,” he said what he’d known for weeks now but they hadn’t talked about.

Huxley’s smile fell and he fell out of step with him. “Oh. Yeah. Um…”

“I’m sorry,” Gavin said. “For that night. I like to flirt.”

“I like your flirting,” Huxley said, quieter.

Gavin raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

Huxley nodded, big hand twisting in the strap of his bag now. “Yeah. I mean, that first time… I didn’t know you.”

Gavin’s heart beat faster. He had absolutely abandoned paying attention to where he was going. Who cared if he walked into a tree? He was not going to miss any of Huxley’s reactions right now… “And now?”

Huxley blushed, but the little smile was sly. “I mean, now we’re friends, right?”

“Yes,” Gavin agreed. They were. “So… flirting is okay?”

Huxley laughed and nodded. “I mean, if you wanted to, yeah.”

“Physical contact?”

Huxley smiled, arm bumping his again as if to point out that they had already passed that point. “I’m down for contact… if you are, of course.”

It was Gavin’s turn to laugh. “Oh, Sunflower…” He slid his hand across the small of Huxley’s back. “You have opened a can of worms and I am so excited about it.”

The big guy just smiled, like he wasn’t worried at all. “Oh, Ash said there’s a party this weekend. Did you… Are you going?”

Gavin was at every party that mattered. “Are you?” Suddenly he was sure that if Huxley wasn’t going, he’d rather go wherever Hux was.

[russilton]

it *was* a little iffy how lewis said he wasn't aware of george's abuse by his fans when spinz was actively being shady. As a fan of both, it bothered me. What do you make of it?

I would chalk that one up to PR talk… cause yeah, it absolutely wasn’t great but also what did you expect him to say? “Yeah I knew about it but-“ was never going to happen, and arguably makes him look worse, or, like he’s being forced into caring about it now by a second party, and that fuels more conspiracies.

I personally really dislike the thing we sometimes see where people are angry about something, the person involved apologises and actually does what we’ve been calling them to do, and then people… pick holes in the apology and try to find ways to still be mad.

It’s like when Merc apologised for their first trophy comment. You can be mad something happened at all, but you can’t expect them to jump in a Time Machine and go back to un do it. Learning and owning up to mistakes is actually what I WANT to see people do. Lewis’ history of doing that is why I like him so much.

This is not a black and white view, I’ve stayed mad more than once- but in this case fans have been mad for years he did nothing, now he’s said sorry I didn’t know, but people shouldn’t do that… and people are just going how dare you not know.

It’s one thing to roll your eyes and move on, but a lot of the time I see people looking for a way to remain on an angry high horse and that shit is exhausting.

As I said yesterday I can’t stand whataboutism, and prior abuse does not give Lewis the right to ignore his fans behaviour, but I really can’t separate this from the fact Lewis has faced far worse abuse, frequently racist, from his teammates fans for decades, and very few people ever stuck up for him. No one made Alonso or Max apologise for their fans racist behaviour, in fact their drivers were allowed to defend them and blame Lewis for inciting it upon himself. I can frankly really see why Lewis genuinely never saw it as something he needed to address, especially since George himself seemed fine.

So for that, I’m glad he has, I’m glad for something when I expected nothing, and I can remain in the world of comfortably reminding people that both George and Lewis frequently defend and stick up for each other beyond the general required capacity as teammates. I care more about how they personally interact with each other than the state of idiot fans online.

As for spinz, I don’t like the guy, I haven’t liked him for a long time, but since the scummy tweet likes he’s also commented on George’s posts, praised him, and photographed him. I trust George to decide how he feels about the guy, and he’s clearly been comfortable with him in person.

If we start measuring up how George’s friends have been shitty about things online, we will be in an endless cycle of terrible. I don’t police my friends likes, if I did far less of them would post about ships I hate. I personally don’t expect Lewis to be keeping up with the posts his friends like even if it is about him.

People can argue it all they want, I really don’t think they’re online much, I have a less travel intensive stressful job with less hours, and I struggle to be online some days. It wouldn’t surprise me if the guys who routinely practice willpower exercises over eating things they enjoy, were able to cut our social media from their diet so to speak

TLDR: didn’t expect it, glad he’s said it, hopefully people will be sensible but they probably won’t, I’m personally content with it.

[suuho]

hi kaz !!! i just wanted to say i really am interested sm in how objectively you talk about kpop and music as some one who doesnt actually know much aside from what i think sounds good or interesting to listen to vs what sounds ..... troublesome LOL but i saw your top 5 vocalist ranking and i was wondering where you'd put hui in that? or in btob's case, changsub or hyunsik? xoxoxo

hi!! hey, people don't need to know, like, everything about the stuff they enjoy. it's totally just enough to enjoy it. like, i love dance but i am not as much of a dancer as i am a vocalist, first and foremost, lol. so, what i see there is mostly informed by experience and a lot of dancers i know. but it is not nearly on the same level as my vocal expertise (and even then, i am not a studied vocal teacher, just a singer).

ANYWAYS, now to your question. oh my god, i just love it. because i adore both, btob and pentagon so much. btob could literally raise me out of my grave, the first notes of missing you are enough to revive me, ready to take eunkwang's high harmony. it's also my go-to karaoke song. so, i like. i just love to sing that song, man. more under the cut cause ramble.

i wanna start with changsub here, because he was one of the first vocalists i noticed in btob. his strong suit are a stunning falsetto (when he sings high notes in a high, soft pitch) and vibrato (when the voice, like, trembles after you finish a note). like, he is so beyond good at that and i think his tone is so crazy beautiful. sungjae and eunkwang harmonize so beautifully with him, too. they really compliment his voice tone. he has such a soft yet strong sound quality. his voice sounds like a lullaby, perfectly suited for pop ballads, yet he also sounds great on r&b songs. you catch my drift.

i fell in love with hyunsik super quickly, something about the fact that he wrote missing you immediately spoke to me. that song is like a cornerstone of my identity, i am sorry that i keep talking about it. anyways, his voice sits lower than eunkwang's or changsub's but he’s got those soaring vocals when he sings high notes. he was made to sing with eunkwang, i believe. like, these two voices are like honey and caramel. bread and butter. they belong together. he is super good in his own range, and especially when he allows his voice to really rise. he is soooo musically gifted. it's good when a vocalist knows his way around an instrument, or composing. and his tone is like a warm blanket on a cool day. he tends to go a little nasal but i think that is just his vocal quality. still, he often sings open and rich and beautiful.

now, hui. he is just, such a beast. he is not as technically finessed as either eunkwang or jinho, imo, but he is the most interesting vocalist among them in terms of tone, color and texture. he's got so much passion and drive behind his voice, and he is super stable. he's got range. like, he can sing well up high, up into his fifth octave, his mix is super strong which affords him to sing powerful and well articulated even when he exudes the range of his chest voice (and gave us basquiat etc.)

so, i have tiers for vocalists. the first tier are my top five. the second tier is where i would sort kyungsoo, hui, baekhyun, minjun, and probably kihyun from monsta x, too. i would sort changsub there as well. and i would probably sort hyunsik a little lower because he is simply not as versatile as the others, but a strong vocalist nonetheless.

[mitskijamie]

Roy obviously knows that Jamie admires/respects/looks up to him but I like to think there's some part of him that wants Jamie to think he's like. Cool. On some level he's just a middle aged man who peaked in his 20s and craves validation from his cool gen Z coworker. I'm not like a regular coach I'm a Cool coach

[absolutemimery]

1 year since I fell in love with the big fat red guy

Extra selfship doodles hgghghhh

[daily-whistlepaw]

daily whistlepaw until ah becomes PoV day 1167

I think I finally understand how people feel when around a crush, can't say I enjoy it

[whump-n-comfort]

when you read a fic that gives you a hyper-specific whump scenario that you know would either A.) take forever to find in another story or B.) hasn't been written at all so the obvious conclusion is that you have to write it yourself

[madd-nix]

if i go to jail for strangling my brother, just know he tried to kill me first by bringing over his girlfriend 's cat all the time, knowing i'm allergic

[kishimotomasashi]

Looking back, I feel like I was exaggeratedly mean to Madara while I was in my Madara fever phase just so it would look like I was Thinking About Him Critically. I feel like I have this tendency to overstate how Bad a character is even when I like them and try to get others to like them or even talk about them to others because I'm scared of the secondhand embarrassment I'll get if I catch people who like the same character as me Interpret Them Badly and then have to watch an onlooker make fun of them and then I feel like oh god I'm associated with this (reasonable thing to be scared of in internet space that is mostly made for having fun)

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

its so weird to read some of my old fics (do NOT do it but i'm just being hypothetical rn) and reading it. like who even was this person?? i completely was in a haze back in 2020. i literally was posting 3 chapters a day. A DAY. what in the WORLD was that shit.

anyway i remembered some STUPID sappy shit and i didnt remember if i'd put it into a fic or not BUT I FOUND IT.

She and Hope had been dating in secret for months anyway, and any attempt to go talk to Ryan only filed her disposition of displeasure upon knowing that she couldn’t tell anyone, Molly especially, it destroyed herself mentally. They couldn’t really go anywhere near the school, always having to lie to everyone about having projects together when Molly wasn’t around them. It’d consisted with 9 PM - 2 AM intervals of being able to actually see each other. Hope would sneak through her small bedroom window with a portable record player and whatever she had gotten from the vintage record store downtown, and Amy would always fall asleep around eleven because of her internal clock. She would always wake up to find a single sticky note stuck on the edge of her desk whenever she woke up to her alarm the next morning. One of them, Amy still had tucked inside of her phone case, a heavily detailed human heart, with blue and red ink sketched onto a neon pink sticky note, there was a caption that headed the small paper reading the phrase over every now and again makes her almost melt every time. “You have my heart.”

yeah idk why the fuck but i thought of this fucking idea again today and i was like "omg did i ever put that heart note thing in a fic???" yeah you fucking did.

all that to say ME AND WHO???? imagine. thats so fucking.... RAHHHH.

[mainfaggot]

little sisters are a test from god actually