Tumgik
#i want to take a gap year but im really worried that it will be hard to get back into school afterwards
crows-of-buckets · 18 days
Text
Its the middle of the night and instead of sleeping I keep thinking about Aviae and Anders's dynamic ougaggga
#dragon age#oc: aviae surana#like. they have ~10 year age gap give or take#i think little four year old aviae saw anders and just decided she was going to follow him around#because she refuses to cooperate with literally anyone else anders gets stuck with babysitting duties#(he acts like he hates it at first but he really doesnt. although he doesnt appreciate the extra attention from everyone else. makes it#harder to plan escapes yk)#sometimes i worry im overindulging in these two being so family like. then i remember that i can do what i want and avi is my oc so#anyways. anders teaching her to read and write because shes FOUR and so so little and doesnt know how to do hardly anything#and as she gets older aviae decides to specialize in spirit healing because of anders#(he acts wounded when shes better at it than he is but in honesty hes just so proud of her)#they have a very sibling dynamic and it makes me sick to think about. in a good way though#i think as aviae got older she started trying to help anders with his escapes#she probably assisted at least a little bit with the escape after karl. even if it was just distracting someone lmao#anyways. they are so very special. to me#worldstate: mage rights#i may be cringe but i am free. idc <3#i think the idea of anders and surana/amell beinh close before awakening is neat idk#aviae and anders dynamic is funny becuase like. the tiny little elven mage who you watched grow up is now your boss and is also the you know#hero of fucking fereldan. crazy
3 notes · View notes
sunrizef1 · 2 months
Text
Milk and Sugar
Pairing: Max Verstappen x Fem!Reader
Warnings: Not edited, cursing maybe, the ex gf isn’t anyone specific don’t @ me
Summary: Max is tired of his persistent ex girlfriend and friends that are maybe a little too empathetic about his breakup. What better way to scare them off than getting a new girlfriend? But he doesn’t actually want a new relationship. Enter: you. The perfect (fake) new girlfriend.
Word Count: 9.6k
Authors Note: this fic was kicking my ass im gonna be so fr. It took forever and I just couldn’t write the ending for some reason. Hopefully now that this is up, I can do something else lmfao
Tumblr media
You were just doing a favor for a friend.
Or that’s what you had told yourself when Max had originally asked you to go along with his stupid idea. You hadn’t even really wanted to agree, by the way. He had just needed your help so badly and that’s what friends are for, right?
So that’s how you’d ended up in his garage, Red Bull hat pulled tightly over your head as you watched his car sail around the track in Brazil, the season well under way.
You’d met Max a few years back. You’d moved into the apartment next to his, not even blinking as your eyes scanned over the future world champion, too focused on your dog trying his best to distract you from the heavy box in your hands.
“Apollo! Stop!” You sighed at the dog as he jumped at your legs, trying his hardest to knock the box full of dog food and treats out of your arms. The dog, not knowing English, didn’t listen, of course, continuing his assault on your calves.
The box tilts in your grasp, coming dangerously close to falling out of your arms. But suddenly, the weight is lifted away and Apollo seems to turn his attention to whatever had relieved you from your struggle, giving you the opportunity to pull the small dog into your grasp, trying your best to calm his rowdiness down.
Once you’ve gotten the dog to calm down a significant amount, you look up to see who’d saved you from hours of cleaning loose dog food off the floor during your first day in your new apartment. You’re met with bright blue eyes staring back at you, a concerned look on the strangers face.
You’re too worried about the pretty man in front of you to even worry about Apollo as he starts to nibble lightly on your jacket.
“Are you okay?” And then he speaks for the first time and you’re captivated. Not in a love-at-first-sight way, of course. More of a this-guy-might-be-perfect kind of way.
You nod, gently separating your dogs mouth off your hoodie string, petting his, most-likely, empty head warmly, “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. This little guy just really wanted that food, I guess.”
The stranger laughs, moving the box in his arms to rest against his hip, “I’m more of a cat person, anyway.”
You fake a wince, shaking your head with a frown, “Ahh, guess we can’t be friends then, mysterious stranger. Im a dog person all the way.”
He laughs again, grinning warmly, “Any way I could help you with this? Can’t imagine it’s easy moving in with a dog running around.”
Your eyes widen at his words, your hand fumbling to fish the key to your new apartment out of your pocket, “Only if you’re free! I wouldn’t want to bother my new neighbor on my first day.”
Your neighbor shakes his head, light brown hair falling down on his forehead, “It’s no big deal, I’m surprisingly free today.”
You smile, pushing the door to your apartment open, setting Apollo down as you enter. The dog immediately starts to scope out the area, bounding up and down the halls, his collar jangling loudly as he does. You hear the man enter behind you, watching as he walks over and places the box of dog food on the counter in the kitchen.
“Usually I learn a man’s name before I invite him into my apartment,” you smirk, laughing as a blush coats your neighbors face. He takes the few steps back over to close the gap between you, sticking out a calloused hand toward you.
“I’m Max.”
You smile, repeating his name before reciting your own, clasping your hand in his much rougher one, tilting your head up at him as you shake, letting go after a few moments.
“It’s nice to meet you max,” you say, smiling as you see Max’s face light up happily, “How inclined would you be to helping me get the rest of my boxes?”
Max laughs as he sees the sweet grin on your face, shaking his head as he moves toward the door, “I’d love to help, y/n. Can’t have my new favorite neighbor moving in alone, can I?”
Your face splits into a grin as you follow him toward the exit, turning to make sure Apollo was comfortably inside the apartment so he wouldn’t try and run away before closing the door behind you.
Max did help you that day, the moving in process going substantially quicker with the help of the athlete. He even invited you over to his place for dinner, explaining that it’d be too much of a hassle for you to make dinner after moving in all day. You didn’t bring up the fact he’d been moving all day as well, simply following him next door instead.
That had been three years ago and you’d been friends ever since. It was a casual friendship, more moved by the proximity than anything else.
He’d had to explain f1 to you, you being completely unfamiliar with the sport despite having moved to Monaco, probably the place with the most connection to it. Now, you’d casually watch his races as you worked or ate dinner, not entirely sure what was going on but supporting your friend anyway.
He’d also eventually asked you to watch his cats for him, Jimmy and Sassy being surprisingly friendly with your puppy. Max had been scared about introducing them, prefacing with many statements about how much the cats hated dogs and that it really wouldnt be a problem if you couldn’t watch them if they hated each other.
All that talk went out the window when the first thing the pets did when they met each other was take a nap.
It was January when it happened. You had been sitting calmly in your apartment, watching Bridgerton and eating pasta, your work computer abandoned to the side of the couch. You had a blanket pulled over your lap, a hot mug of tea sitting on the coffee table in front of you. Rare snow fell softly outside your window, albeit not very much snow but snow nonetheless.
You were very content.
This, of course, all came crashing down when you heard the sound of your apartment door banging open, heavy footsteps signaling the arrival of your neighbor. You’d given him a key for emergencies, although you couldn’t possibly imagine what could warrant an emergency at this time.
You roll your eyes as you hear him approach, setting your pasta down on the table and grabbing the remote to pause your show, turning as Max throws himself down on the couch next to you.
“Hello, Max. Can I help you?” You sigh, trying to force a smile onto your face. Max seems to catch your discontent and grimaces, wincing away slightly.
“Bad time?”
You let out a breath, not able to stay mad at the Dutch man for very long, “Maybe a little, but it’s fine, really. Did you need something?”
Max nods, sitting up straighter, “I may or may not have a formal request. Neighbor to neighbor.”
You furrow your eyebrows at his response, noting his slightly nervous behavior, “Okay?”
He takes a deep breath before speaking, his eyes trailing over toward where your tv was currently paused, “You know how I just went through that breakup, right?”
You hum, all too familiar with the aforementioned breakup, having had Max barge into your apartment for comfort food and movie marathons more than a few nights in the wake of his, now ex, girlfriends departure.
“Well,” Max starts and you can sense the hesitation in his tone but considering he had interrupted your night, you opted to let him flounder, “It’s been weird on the grid since then.”
“Okay,” you hum, eyes glancing over his face and catching the way he grimaces.
“Ever since the break-up, all the guys have been looking at me like I’m a child, you know? Like I might fall apart any second. Even though I’m completely fine!”
You stare, knowing more than anyone else, that he wasn’t very fine for a while, although he’d miraculously recovered over the past few months. You also stared in hopes he’d soon get to the point of the conversation.
“They also keep trying to set me up with their friends as if I need a rebound when I would really rather stay single,” Max groans, rubbing a hand over his tired eyes. Your furrow your eyebrows, wondering where this could be going.
Max glances up, eyes avoiding yours at all costs, “I was wondering if you could, maybe..”
Max trails off, wincing slightly. You stare straight ahead at him blankly, waiting for him to finish his request. He does eventually mumble something under his breath and you lean forward, eyebrows raised.
“Sorry?”
Max grumbles, annoyed and you roll your eyes at the attitude of the man disrupting your own night.
“Could you pretend to be my girlfriend for a while?” Max rushes out, hands carding through his hair nervously, “Just long enough for the guys to leave me alone, you don’t even have to do anything, maybe just come to Brazil and Monaco-“
Max continues to ramble on for a few seconds, words seeming to fall out of his mouth unceremoniously before he’s cut off by you interrupting him.
“Max!” You raise your voice slightly in an attempt to talk to over him. Max freezes, looking at your face for the first time since he’s crashed through your front door, “I’ll do it.”
He stares at you blankly for a few moments, trying to process your words, “Really?”
You shrug, teeth digging into your lip as you turn your head toward the large window across the room that overlooked the darkened city of Monte Carlo, “Why not? You’re my friend. Plus I work remotely and who doesn’t want to travel around the world to all those different cities?”
Max’s face lights up at your response, his lips forming a huge grin. He rolls over into a lying position, practically star-fishing on your couch, “Thank you so much! I owe you one.”
You hum, fighting the smile on your lips as you watch him close his eyes calmly. You slip up from the couch quietly, padding over to the kitchen to grab something.
“Where are you going? Did I scare you off already?” You hear Max call as you walk away. As you walk back over, his eyes are still closed though, signaling that he didn’t really think he’d scared you off.
He does open his eyes as you set the bowl of leftover pasta and a fork on his chest before grabbing your own and sitting down, grabbing the remote to press play. He glances over as you settle into the couch and move your blanket over your lap before he sits up. You take a bite of your pasta as you continue to watch your show. Max takes a second but he eventually digs in as well, sitting up in order to grasp the bowl better.
Even after the pastas finished, you both sit back on the couch in order to finish the show. You glance over at Max, his eyes still locked onto the screen.
What had you gotten yourself into?
————
“Are you ready?”
You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself as you sit in the passengers seat of Max’s car, the hoards outside having no idea what was waiting for them inside. You slide your sunglasses onto your nose, hoping they’d hide at least a little bit of the anxiety flowing through you.
You nod, turning your head toward Max in the drivers seat, “Yeah, I’m good.”
Max hums, not entirely convinced but also aware he had no other option but to believe you considering he’s the one who’d asked you to do this. He opens his door, stepping out and sliding his own sunglasses on. You watch as he walks around the front of the car before stopping in front of your door and pulling it open. You pause for a moment but eventually step out, trying not to wince as the bright sun hits you.
You immediately step into his path, falling into stride next to him as you both walk toward the entrance. You hear the car lock behind you and watch Max pocket the keys.
The bright Miami sun beats down on your skin, causing you to wish you’d opted for a thinner shirt. Max had originally proposed for your first race to be Monaco but you had decided it was better to appear earlier than later for his sake. Plus, you’d always enjoyed Miami and were up for the idea of traveling there. You’d also originally planned to buy your own plane tickets but Max was quick to shut that one down.
As you both approached the turnstiles, Max pulls his lanyard out of his pocket. You don’t even notice as he pulls you inside the paddock, too busy trying not to notice the cameras surrounding you. Flashes come from all around you, the incessant clicks echoing through your head.
You finally do notice that Max hasn’t let go of your hand after he pulled you into the paddock. You grasp his hand a little tighter and he pulls you closer into his side as a response. When heat starts to rise to your face, you decide to blame it on the Miami sun.
As you both walk toward the Red Bull hospitality, heads turn to watch you walk by. You can feel people’s eyes trailing after you, locked on your unfamiliar form. Everything new in the paddock very quickly became a spectacle. Especially when it involved the current world champion.
You’re sure you’ll see pictures of yourself splashed all across the internet when you wake up in Max’s hotel room the next day. You’re sure your mom will send you whatever article they’ll attach your name to, no doubt hounding you for information about your new celebrity “boyfriend”.
You’d been curled up in Max’s hotel room the whole weekend, occasionally dipping out to get food with him between events. He’d wanted you to come to the track since Thursday but you weren’t entirely sure you were ready to step out as “Max Verstappens new girlfriend” until you’d woken up Sunday morning.
You’d woken up before Max, somehow. As you laid in your plush hotel room bed, you could hear Max’s soft breathing from the other bed filtering through the silence of the morning. Just outside the window, the city of Miami was waking up. At least, the early birds were.
You and Max had slept in the same room enough over the years, Max randomly crashing at your place pretty often, that when he suggested you getting a different room, you’d immediately turned him down. You were telling yourself it was just because it was nice to have the comfort of a friend but something deep down knew that that wasn’t the only reason.
You let the only sounds be his breathing and the light hum of the air on unit for a few more minutes while you woke up. You slid out of the bed as silently as possible, your feet padding quietly against the carpeted floor. You pull the door open to the balcony slowly, stepping out before closing it behind you. The sun is still pretty low in the sky but it still makes you flinch as it seeps into your eyes.
You sink into one of the two chairs out on the balcony, pulling your knees up to your chest and resting your chin on top, letting your thoughts run wild.
You watch Miami move below you, the sun slowly shining down brighter and brighter, painting the sky in shades of orange and pink.
You weren’t entirely sure why you’d agreed to this idea so quickly. With every day that passed, you wished more and more that you hadn’t. Doubt seeped through you with every second you watched Max from the hotel television. He was just so good at his job and such a cool, wonderful person and athlete. How could you keep up with him? The press would be insistent and non-stop invasive. Fans would, no doubt, dogpile on you as well, both warning to know everything about you as well as rip you apart. You start to wonder if there was a single positive of this for you.
The door slides open behind you and you can hear Max moving onto the balcony beside you. You don’t glance over, only moving your gaze away from the skyline as a mug is held in front of your face. You glance down at it, spotting the coffee inside before you grasp the mug out of his hands gently. The ceramic warms your hands, the steam from the liquid splaying across your face.
“There was only those little creamer pods,” Max hums as he takes a sip of his own mug, leaning against the bannister in front of you, “Hope that’s okay.”
You chew at your lip, taking a sip of your own mug, humming lightly as your gaze locks on his back, “That’s fine, thanks.”
You’d usually take your coffee with milk and a spoonful of sugar but you’d had enough gas station or hotel room coffee that you’d be able to survive with just the creamer pods.
You watch Max’s side profile as he stares out at the city, the sun bouncing off the edges and planes of his face and perfectly lighting up his eyes. You bask in quiet that settles between you, sipping at your coffee periodically. You don’t quickly forget the kindness of his gesture. Actually, the action stays in your head for longer than it probably should, mind running wild as you think about his motives.
You dismiss it, though, not wanting to linger on something that probably meant nothing.
“You coming to the race today?” Max turns around to face you, his back leaning against the rail he’d just been looking out over.
Your eyes trace him as he turns, evaluating his early morning form. As you look at this man, your friend, you think about the coffee in your hands. You think about the times he’d dogsat Apollo despite hating dogs, the days he’d come over just to keep you company when you were homesick, when he’d attempted to cook you soup when you’d been sick despite his complete inability to cook soup, you even think back to the first day you’d met when he’d helped you move in despite having known you for all of thirty seconds.
As all those memories passed through your mind, you suddenly remember why you’d agreed to do this in the first place.
“Yeah, I am,” you reply, taking a long sip of your coffee and hiding your grin as one of his own makes its way onto his lips.
————
That had been earlier that morning and know you were sat in Red Bull, watching as Max’s car passes the finish line in second. You’d been biting your nails the whole time, worry seeping through you. You weren’t the biggest formula 1 nerd but Max had forced you to watch enough old races for you to get what was going on. You’d even started watching his races when he was gone, something that had taken you months to admit.
Because of Max’s insistence, you knew enough to grimace as the safety car came out. You were right to grimace, of course, as Lando was quick to pass your friend, taking the lead and the win. Max, for what it’s worth, didn’t seem too angry about the result. You were aware of Landos lack of wins, seeing why his winning would make everyone happy, even the losers. Not that you were too happy, you’d only ever and only ever would cheer for Max, even if Lando was deserving of a win of his own.
Max doesn’t get asked about you during interviews. At least, not directly. He gets asked how life had been and he answers with a vague answer about love and how great life has been. You know he’s talking out of his ass but you’re grinning anyway, not able to hold back you mind from thinking about a world where everything he was saying was true.
“Landos gonna have a big celebration,” Max starts as he gets back to you after the podium, walking you both back toward his room so he can change, “He’ll probably be awake for the next 72 hours.”
You smile lightly, resting a tired head against his sweaty shoulder, “Good for him, seems like he really deserves it.”
Max nods with a pleasant look on his face, “Yeah, I’m not even that mad about losing. Nothing I could’ve done really. Im just glad he got his win.”
You nod, taking a breath in order to hold back the yawn threatening to leave your mouth, “You should go to his party, I’ll just go grab some dinner and head back to get some sleep.”
You both stop as you reach his room, Max facing you as he leans back against the door to open it. You notice the deep furrow in his eyebrows as he locks eyes with you, “What are you talking about?”
You furrow your own eyebrows as a response, tilting your head to the side, “You should go celebrate with your friend? Go have fun, Max!”
He shakes his head as he enters the room, quickly gathering his things to go take a quick shower, “Why would I celebrate a loss with a coworker when I can get some quality time with a friend instead? I’d rather celebrate a win with you instead of a loss without you. Trust me, you’ll be there to see me win.”
You’re already at a loss for words at his response but your rendered speechless as Max pulls his fireproofs off, tossing the shirt to the side passively. He turns away from you and you watch his muscles ripple under his skin, your face hearing greatly. His arms flex as he reaches for something and you have to bite your lip to keep your mouth closed. Your eyes are wide as he turns to glance over his shoulder at you, “That okay?”
At the risk of sounding like an idiot if you attempt to respond with words, you simply nod, eyes moving toward the floor. You don’t notice the smirk that forms on his lips as he catches your stare.
“I’m gonna shower and then we can leave,” he calls out over his shoulder as he walks into his bathroom. Your eyes are still locked onto the floor. You hear the sound of water pattering against the floor just after the door shuts.
You take a large sip of your water bottle, trying to wet your drying throat and keep the heat in your face at bay. You feel like you might be going crazy, the image of Max’s shirtless back etched into your mind.
Jesus Christ.
————
“What do you wanna watch?” Max mumbles through a mouth full of pizza, his hand coming up to covering it as he speaks.
You shrug, “I don’t know.”
Max shrugs as well, grabbing the remote off the nightstand and passively flickering through the channels as he swallows his bite of pizza, “Come get some food.”
He gestures toward the box of pizza on the edge of his bed with the remote, glancing toward you sitting in your own bed, watching him instead of the tv. You slide off the bed, taking the few steps it takes to get to his own and gently settling on the side he wasn’t currently sitting on.
Max watches you move, humming as you grasp a piece from the pizza box before he turns his attention back to the screen. You don’t notice as he settles on a movie, too busy trying not to absolutely scarf down the food in your hand.
Your eyes do leave the slice to glance over at Max, legs outstretched with his back firmly against the headboard. He’s wearing a Red Bull hoodie, even managing to wear team merch in his own bedroom. He’s also got some old basketball shorts, a faded logo sitting on the upper thigh that, no matter how much you try, you can’t understand.
You look away when you hear the familiar sound of Lightning McQueen echoing out of the television speakers. You quickly catch sight of the Italian formula car, deducing that Max has chosen Cars 2, of all movies.
You try your best not to laugh but a giggle escapes you anyway, causing you to bury your head in your shoulder to try and hide your grin.
“What?” Max asks you and you look forward again, eyes locked onto the movie, “What’s so funny?”
Your head turns toward the driver who’s grin is now matching your own, “You chose probably the only movie on here that uses the words “Grand Prix” can’t even get away from racing in your hotel room.”
He feigns offense for a few moments before reaching forward to grab another piece of pizza and sliding down into more of a lying position, “It’s a good movie.”
You both turn to the screen for a few moments but the second Lewis Hamilton’s voice rings out in the silence, you laugh loudly, Max groaning beside you.
You quickly dissolve into giggles, trying your hardest to reign it in but when you look over and see the amused frown on Max’s face, you’re right back into it again, Max laughing in response.
You both do eventually settle down, watching the movie and eating your food together. Even after the pizza box is empty and max moves to set it on the table, you don’t move from your spot, using the reasoning that it’s just easier to see the screen from his bed.
You try not to notice the proximity between you. You’d been holding hands all day and you’d pressed several kisses to his cheeks and forehead, being near him shouldn’t bother you. But when you shift slightly closer just to get more comfortable and Max’s arm falls down over your shoulder, you freeze, keeping as still as you can.
He doesn’t move his arm through the rest of the movie. Not that you’d know, considering you drift off with about half an hour to go. But Max doesn’t notice that either, considering how he fell asleep just after.
You wake up before him again the next morning, don’t the same thing you’d done the day before and walking out to the balcony. Max does the same thing he did as well, walking out with two mugs grasped gently in his grip.
When you take the mug from him, you try not to think about the fact you’d woken up limbs tangled with his and your face pressed into his chest.
————
The São Paulo Grand Prix.
It had been 6 months of this charade with Max. That’s right, you’d managed to suffer through 6 whole months of pretending to be his girlfriend. There’s been countless headlines from various news sites, trying their best to figure out every single detail about your life and relationship with Max.
The only thing keeping your mind together was the root of the problem himself and your prolonged roommate, Max.
He was actually really lovely. Every time you suggested a different room for his sake, you’d end up right where you were the week before, in a bed across from his. You’d also kept the same morning routine every day, waking up before Max and sitting out on the balcony until he brought coffee out for both of you.
He’d eventually gotten to a point where he sat in the chair next to you as opposed to standing up and leaning against the railing. There was still little conversation, though, you both enjoying the silence of an early morning instead.
This specific morning, you were watching the city of São Paulo move along below you. Goosebumps raised slightly as the wind-chilled November air nipped at the skin on your arms. The sun hadn’t completely rose yet and the previous nights rain had left the air colder than it should’ve been. You found yourself rubbing your hands over your arms and wishing you’d worn something other than a t-shirt.
The door slides open behind you and you take the mug as it’s placed in your eye line, grateful for the heat of the mug to warm up your cold hands. You lower your face toward the mug, letting the steam warm up your wind-chilled skin. You go to take a sip but it burns at your lips when you tilt the mug, causing you to set it down on the small table in order for it to cool for a few moments.
After you set it down, something lands in your lap. You look down, holding the item up and quickly recognizing it as one of Max’s Red Bull hoodies. You glance over at him but he’s still looking out over the city below, sipping passively at his mug of black coffee.
You look back down at the item of clothing, glancing between it and the owner for a few seconds before deciding to slip it on, your cold skin winning out over any reasonable thought that would tell you not to wear it.
The hoodies too big for you and it smells like Max but you don’t really seem to mind either of those things. Especially as your skin heats as the fabric passes over it.
Once you’ve got the hoodie on, you pick up your coffee again, blowing on it slightly to cool it down. You raise the cup to your lips, letting the warm liquid flow into your mouth.
You hum at the taste, quickly noticing that it tastes different than usual. You furrow your eyebrows, taking another sip. The oh-so wonderful taste that you’d missed so dearly over the past 6 months takes over your tastebuds. The taste of real milk and sugar.
You hum pleasantly, grasping the cup tightly. You glance over toward the man who’d handed you the drink, “Is this milk and sugar?”
Max glances toward you for a split-second before he looks back over the city, taking a sip of his own coffee, “Yeah, that’s how you like it, right? You always drink it like that back home.”
You ignore the jolt in your stomach when Max refers to the Monaco apartments as a shared home. You bite your lip with an affirmative hum, “Where’d you get milk and sugar?”
“Couldn’t sleep last night, went for a walk. There’s a corner store down the block and I picked some up,” Max says it casually, like it’s not the most considerate anyone had been of you, maybe ever.
You stare at him for a few moments, trying to ignore the warm feeling in your chest as you imagine him thinking about you enough to buy coffee ingredients the way you liked them.
As you sat outside, in his hoodie, sipping on the coffee he had made and handed to you, you finally accept what you’d been trying to deny for six months, if not longer.
You were in love with Max Verstappen.
You longed for the domesticity that was so present on mornings like these. You wanted to live this life with him all the time. You didn’t just want to fall asleep beside him after a race but you wanted to be able to press your lips against his when he won instead of the light touches you’d flutter against his cheek. You wanted to wear his hoodies all the time, not just when you were cold and forgot one of your own. You wanted to stop pretending in front of his friends. You wanted the hushed whispers to be sweet nothings instead of scheming and planning.
You wanted this life with him. All the time.
“Max-” you start but you’re quickly cut off by Max as he speaks instead.
“My ex is going to be at this race,” he states and you close your mouth, deflating slightly as you look away, “Just wanted to prepare you in case we run into her. You could also, um, probably stop coming once you scare her off.”
You nod meekly, taking a sip of your coffee. What had once been your idea of a sanctuary with the silence of the morning is now too quiet, allowing your thoughts to be the only noise in your head, images of Max’s ex rolling around aimlessly.
You stand up quickly, taking rushed steps back into the room. You down the last sips of your coffee and slide it onto the table, moving hurriedly around the room to gather your things for a shower. You vaguely notice Max walking back into the room with a confused look but you don’t even look up as you rush into the bathroom, “I’m taking a shower.”
“Okay?” Max says as you close the door behind you. You don’t notice the frown on his face as he disappears from view.
You’re too busy throwing off his hoodie and turning the shower to practically scalding heat, trying your hardest to rid yourself of thoughts about a life with Max, thoughts of his ex-girlfriend or thoughts about the stupid coffee he’d handed you and how stupid you were to be reading so much into it.
For a moment there, you’d thought that Max was enjoying this as much as you were. But his words were quick to remind you that you were only there to do a favour for him. He is only there to get his friends and his ex off his back. After that, you were free to go. It even vaguely sounded like Max didn’t want you to come back around the next weekend.
Why else would he have said that? Why else would he have suggested you stop coming? Especially just after talking about his ex. It was a stark reminder that you were only a tool for him to mess with his ex. She was the one he’d loved, you were just a girl he knew.
You stay under the scalding water long enough for the mirrors to fog and your fingertips to prune. Your cuticles sting from where the hot water had made its way into the raw skin, the cuts still fresh from where you’d been anxiously picking at them.
You only pull yourself from the water when you start to sway from the heat, your head going light and an ache echoing through your skull.
————
A few hours later, you’re by Max’s side again, although there’s a slightly larger distance between you than usual.
That would change soon, no doubt, when Max spotted his ex, pulling you close to attempt to show his devotion to your fake relationship.
But for now, you're an arms-length away, hoping that pushing him away would also push away your own feelings.
Max can't grasp even an idea as to why you were acting like this. Did you really want this to be over that badly? He knew he'd mentioned the idea of your… situation ending but he didn't think you'd be this eager to get away from him.
At the first camera flash, you take a step closer to Max, knowing how even the smallest hint of discontent between you would be twisted for headlines and it would end with your concerned mother calling you fifty times to check on your relationship after seeing an article on Facebook.
So you step closer, reaching over to intertwine your hands. Max doesn't resist and you try not to read into the gentle squeeze he replies with.
Brazils nice. Or at least, you assume. You'd been too distracted to take much notice. But you do notice the fans yelling from all around. Lively crowds sway and shout in the distance, hues of blue and black and orange all represented amongst the groups.
Max leads you through the paddock, determination clear in his steps. It was most likely just his own determination not to talk to anyone, especially a certain ex-girlfriend.
You both get to Red Bull without an unwanted interaction and the second you're out of the public eye, you're dropping his hand, none the wiser to the confused look on the driver's face.
The tension's palpable in his small room. Awkward conversation flows, your words biting and curt. Neither of you wants to address the obvious undertones your words contain. One of hostility and unshared secrets. But you manage to survive until Max has to leave to get ready for the race and you follow just a few minutes later, making your way to watch said race.
The race is fine. Max wins, but you were never in doubt about that. He was starting from pole, it'd be pretty hard for him to lose. Lando finished just a few seconds behind him, having closed the gap a bit after getting past George.
As the team starts to leave to go greet Max, Christian Horner pulls you along, saying something about Max wanting you at the barrier after the race. You're sure its just so he can put on a show for his ex.
But you follow along anyway, trying not to stumble in your heels as Christian walks along a lot faster than you'd want to.
You pass through other teams and friends and guests or the drivers, waving slightly at people you’d gotten to know over the past six months. The thought of not seeing any of these people again after you and Max faked a breakup made your stomach hurt but you ignore it, trying to tell yourself it was for the better.
When Christian reaches the team, he guides you both through the crowd, smiling politely at the engineers as he slides by.
It seems you both reach the barrier just in time, as Max is parking when you come to a stop. You watch as he pulls himself out of the car, cheering a bit to the fans around as he stands atop it. When he pulls off his helmet and balaclava, you try your hardest not to smile at the pure joy on his face.
He glances over his shoulder at something you can't see before he turns and catches your eye, quickly moving in your direction. Before you can even say a word, he's set his helmet down and wrapped both his hands around the sides of your face, pulling it toward his own. His lips are warm, the heat of the race still emanating off of him. You dismiss the sweat in his hair as you wrap a hand softly around the nape of his neck, tangling your fingers in his locks. Your other hand rests on the side of his face, your thumb tracing the marks his helmet had left around his eyes.
You pull away first, glancing up into his eyes with a gentle smile, “Good job, you did amazing Max.”
His face heats and he glances away with a light chuckle, “Thank you, baby. I'm glad you're here.”
You wish he'd stop calling you that. At least for the sake of your heart jumping in your chest every time he does.
He looks away but your eyes are still firmly locked on the side of his face, tracing the familiar path around his features that they'd forged over the past six months. The same path they took every morning when you watched him look out over whatever city you were in that weekend. The same path they took when he fell asleep first during a movie in hopes of memorizing every detail before you slunk back into your own bed to fall asleep, the image of his face still etched into your mind.
But as you stare up at Max, trying to memorize the puzzle pieces of his face while he talks to Christian, you realize how futile of an endeavour it is. Not matter how hard you try, you'll never get the slope of his nose just right in your memories. You'll never get the right shade of turquoise for his eyes. The sandy-dark-blond of his hair will fade away until it was nothing in your mind but the shade of your coffee in the morning instead of the colour of his hair.
Maybe you should find a different apartment. Surely, Monaco had a different apartment complex that was far enough away from Max to rid yourself of the incessant thoughts of him that constantly plagued your love-adled brain.
Throughout all of that, you’d almost forgotten you were in love with him.
But when Max turns back to you, a glint in his eyes and a bright smile gracing his lips, you're suddenly all too aware of that fact.
“I’ll see you in a minute, yeah?”
You nod, smile slowly drifting as he walks away to get weighed and do all the usual post-race theatrics.
Christian pats his hand on your shoulder firmly, smiling as you turn around, “Let’s get to the podium, kid.”
You let Christian lead you away, yet again making his way through the crowd to get you both to the front.
The podium celebration is cute, Max’s happiness practically contagious. Lando and George are enthralled as well, the Brits both happy to back on the podium once again.
But when Max leans over to spray the champagne on the team, you put your hands over your face as Christian laughs beside you, both of you trying to avoid the sticky liquid as much as possible.
You peel away from the crowd after Max walks off, trying to find your way to wherever Max had gone.
As you'd left, you'd wandered away from Christian, who knew the paddock much better than you did. This was your first time here and you found yourself looking around for any sign of the Red Bull driver or, at least, a familiar face who could point you in the right direction.
It takes you a few minutes to gain your bearings but when you hear the familiar sound of Max’s voice, you go that direction, turning a corner to see his face.
And you do see him, post-race glow and all. But it's not just him you find. Standing entirely too close to him with her hand resting on his shoulder, is Max’s ex-girlfriend. She's smiling warmly, nodding animatedly at whatever it is Max is saying. Which, from constantly talking to him, you know is not worth the reaction she's giving him.
He's glancing around, clearly not comfortable with the situation. You huff, looking around before conceding and walking over to the pair. Were you maybe taking your time a little bit? Yeah, but you really didn't want to do this.
You roll your eyes when you catch Max’s eye and a relieved look rolls over his face, “Hey, baby.”
Max uses your arrival as an excuse to take a step back, swinging his arm around your shoulder. He's still covered in champagne and sweat but you ignore it, “Hey, Max.”
You finally glance up to meet the eye of the woman in front of you, her eyes narrowed as she looks between you, “Oh my god, hi! You must be Max’s ex!”
She rolls her eyes before smiling tightly with a nod of her head, “Yeah, I am. You must be his new girlfriend.”
You hum affirmatively, smiling wide as you glance over to the man beside you, “I am, yeah. He's just so perfect. We’re so happy together!”
She narrows her eyes again, glancing you up and down before her eyes stop on your face. You roll your head to the side to rest your temple on his shoulder, resting one of your hands against his chest.
“Well, I’m happy you moved on, Max,” She says, turning her entire attention to the man in question, “You seem… perfect together.”
Max gleams, nodding as he leans in to kiss your cheek, “Yeah, I’m really happy.”
His ex chews on her bottom lip for a few moments before huffing and moving away, turning to shout over her shoulder as she walks away, “Have a great life, Max!”
“Thanks, I guess!” Max replies, laughing as soon as the woman is out of earshot. He pulls away from your side, turning to fully face you.
“Thank you!” Max cheers, grasping your shoulders with his hands, “Did you see her face? She was so pissed that I'd moved on.”
You hum, letting him be happy by himself while you stood quietly, “Yeah, you're welcome.”
You peel away from Max, turning to go back to the car park so you can leave. You don't say anything to Max before you walk away, leaving him to jog to catch up to you.
“You okay?” He asks once he's by your side again. You glance over, catching the concerned look on his face.
“Yeah,” you nod curtly, looking back ahead, “Yeah, I'm fine.”
He doesn't seem convinced but he leaves it be, turning away as well.
He pretends not to notice when you coincidentally step away after he tries to grab your hand.
While Max debriefs, you text one of your friends to ask if you could stay with her for a few days when you got back to Monaco. After this fake relationship was over, you needed to get away from Max for a while just to try and push away the growing feelings you have for the Dutch man.
And with the departure of Max’s ex, you'd served your purpose and you could finally get out of Max’s life and give him the solitude he so longed for.
The ride back to the hotel is quiet, the only noise being the sound of your nails tapping against the screen of your phone. Max glances over periodically but you eventually set your phone down, choosing to stare out the window as the dark streets of Brazil pass by quickly.
When you get back to the hotel, you open the car door before Max can get it for you like he usually does. He sends you another glance, trailing passively behind as you walk in front of him. You both pass through the lobby and the elevator, your steps determined and much quicker than Max really wanted to be walking.
He's still riding the high of his win and the defeat of his ex-girlfriend but you're in your own mind, too sick to your stomach to be happy for him.
You pull out the spare room key when you arrive at the room, pressing it against the sensor before shoving the door open roughly, letting it fall against Max behind you who catches it.
You toss the key on the table by the door and set your phone down beside it. You still don't turn around as you throw the jacket he had let you borrow down on his bed.
"What is your problem?" You hear Max’s voice ring out in the otherwise quiet room. Annoyance paints his words, causing you to pause for a split-second.
"I don't have a problem." You say, cringing when you catch how much of a lie it sounds. You move on, though, pulling your suitcase out from under the bed and unzipping it.
Max scoffs, raising a disbelieving eyebrow, "Are you sure? Because it really feels like you do."
"It's nothing, Max." You reply sharply, walking into the attached bathroom, grateful to get away from his gaze for a second.
You come back out, your toiletry bag in hand. You set it down in your suitcase and stand up, walking over to the closet and pulling your clothes off the rack. The sound of the hangers hitting together echoes through your head, only contributing to the headache that had been growing since your revelation that morning.
Max finally catches onto what you're doing and speaks, his voice almost panicked, "What are you doing?"
"Leaving."
"What, already? Why?" You try not to be swayed by the hurt in his voice, turning around and walking past him to set your clothes down in your case.
He follows you over, stepping closer as you stand up. You try and step past him but he puts his arm out, stopping you in your tracks. You concede with a sigh, finally looking him in his eyes.
"It doesn't matter, Max.”
"But it does! What's wrong?" You finally step past him, on your way to go gather the rest of your things but his question makes you turn your head as you walk away.
"Max! It doesn't matter!" You immediately regret how loud your voice is but this wasn't exactly the time to be thinking about the people next door.
Max shakes his head, following you as you walk toward the doot in order to grab your shoes, "No, no, no. You've been like this all day and I can't think of a reason why. Do you really want to get away from me that badly?"
Your face twists, causing you to shake your head as you walk away, praying he wont follow you this time, "No, Max, that's not-"
He doesn't completely follow you but he does step a bit closer, shaking his head with a loud groan, "Then enlighten me! What could possibly happened in the past day that's making you act like this? Why are you leaving? Why won't you tell me? I thought we were supposed to be in this together! Why are you-"
"Because I'm in love with you, Max!" You shout, finally turning to face him as you say it, making eye contact with him for the first time since you'd walked in.
Silence falls between you and you toss your shoes down, covering your face with one of your hands. For a second, you think that Max might never respond, your stomach turning at the thought.
How hard could it be to find a different apartment in Monaco?
"What?" Max’s voice is soft and you look back to him, trying to will your frustrated tears not to fall.
"I'm in love with you! I fell in love with you and I know you don't feel the same. You only wanted me to do this to placate your friends and scare away your ex and now im getting out of your hair. I'm leaving you alone like you wanted in the first place,” Tears finally drip down your face and you don't bother to wipe them away, knowing there was only more where they came from. You look away as you explain, eyes locked onto the carpet beneath you, not wanting to face your embarrassment head-on.
"What are you talking about?" At Max’s purely confused tone, you look back to his face, teeth digging sharply into your bottom lip.
His face is soft, confusion etched into the furrow between his brows. Your stomach flips and you swallow, trying to rebuild the confidence you’d had at the start of your outburst.
The hotel room suddenly feels too cold, the air causing you to rub your hands over your shoulders in order to suppress the goosebumps that had started to rise. When you do speak again, your voice is soft, volume just above a whisper.
"This morning. You said I could stop coming after this race. And I did my job, I scared away your ex. You don't need me,” you trail off at the end of your statement, your voice breaking slightly as you shake your head, tears streaming out of your closed eyes and down your cheeks.
You expect Max to agree, to send you away, to end your friendship out of pure embarrassment after your decleration.
But he doesn't.
His voice is soft, just as yours was. His words are hushed but the emotion behind them seeps through every single word.
"I do, though. I do need you."
You look up, eyes widening at his statement. You can do nothing but stare as he steps closer, his hands grasping the sides of your face. Your own hands reach up to hold his wrists, just wanting to hold him someway.
He raises an eyebrow gently, quirking his head to ask for silent permission. You nod and its only a split-second before he's leaning down, pressing his lips against yours.
His hands cradle the back of your head, pulling you impossibly closer. Your heart threatens to beat out of your chest, his kiss causing your brain to practically melt. You mold together, leaning as close to him as you can as your hold conveys months and months of pent-up and hidden emotions.
As he pulls away, your lips want to chase his but you hold back, your eyes flickering open as he leans his forehead against yours. Neither of your speak for a few moments, silence settling between the two of you ask you bask in the adoration between you.
Max’s hand drifts back to your jaw, his thumb drifting across your cheekbone passively. You see his eyes look up and you glance up as well, catching his sparkling gaze in yours.
“I love you,” the words tumble out of his mouth, falling smoothly out of the lips you oh-so wished he would press against your own once again, “I'm in love with you. I fell for you during this whole thing, everything about you.”
You go to respond but he cuts you off, shaking his head lightly.
“I only told you that you could stop coming because I thought you'd grown tired of all this,” he takes a deep breath before continuing, leaning slightly into your hand that had drifted into his hair, “But I'm kind of glad I did.”
You furrow your eyebrows, quirking your head. Max pauses, allowing you the chance to admire every feature of his face, turning his freckles into constellations that you'd willingly stargaze in for hours. His hair is tousled from where your fingers had tangled in it and his lips are red from being pressed against yours. His teeth dig into said lip as he thinks before responding. You'd honestly be fine if he never finished his thought and you got to just look at him forever.
But he does finish his thought, the look in his eyes making your heart jump, "Because I don't want to pretend anymore."
You wait a moment, giving him the chance to take it back in case this was a joke, in case he didn't really mean it. But he doesn't take it back, he doesn't laugh.
And so you nod, "I want to do this with you for real, Max. I don't want to lie to anyone anymore, I want to celebrate with you after a race, not because people expect me to, but because I love you."
Max lights up, his face splitting into a wide grin at your words. Before you can react, his arms are around you and your feet are lifted off the ground as Max basically throws you onto the bed beside you.
Your laugh echoes through the hotel room, punctuated by the sound of Max flopping down next to you. You continue to giggle, glancing down to meet Max’s eyes, a special glint shining through.
You calm down after a few seconds as Max continures to gaze at you. When silence finally comes over you, Max leans up to rest on his elbows as you sit up slightly to look down at him.
“I love you too, by the way,” He says softly, “Dont know if you noticed.”
You hum, biting your lip to hold back your laugh, “I assumed so, yeah.”
You laugh as Max huffs, reaching a hand up to pull you down beside him, “Shut up.”
And you do, going quiet as your lips meet his. Later that night, as your both lying in bed, together this time, you fall asleep with your head against his chest, basking in the long-lastint but newly-confessed love between you.
The next morning, you wake up before Max, as you'd done so often. You slip out of his hold and pad over softly to the balcony, sliding on one of his hoodies before you open the sliding door.
You sink into one of the two chairs, looking out over the city of Sao Paulo as it slowly wakes up. The sun peeks out over the horizon, adding light to the previously dark morning.
Eventually, the door slides open behind you and you don’t even have to look to know it’s Max. But you look anyway, happy to take any chance to observe the man.
You take the mug from his offering hand, grasping the warm ceramic tightly. Max doesn’t walk over to the railing, instead moving toward the chair next to you. Before he sits down, he slides it over, pushing it as close to your chair as it could go. He sits down and you twist to sit sideways, leaning your legs over the arm of the chair. Max gently pulls your ankles over his chair to rest in his lap before he takes a long sip of his coffee.
You take a long sip of your own mug as well, letting the taste of the coffee coat your throat and warm your heart.
Milk and sugar, just the way you like it.
——————
Tags: @evie-119 @casperlikej
2K notes · View notes
sluttysturn · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁ 𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁
˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖𝖳𝖠𝖪𝖤 𝖨𝖳˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖
˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁ 𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁
pairing ˖ ݁𖥔 dom!chris x virgin!reader
in which you are embarrassed about being a virgin, so your best friend, chris sturniolo, takes that problem away.
TW: smut, unprotected p n v (birth control), oral (received by reader), virginity loss, use of pet names
notes: (y/f/n = your friends name) (color of who’s speaking: y/f/n | y/n | chris | nick | matt)
credits: this story is inspired by @evie-sturns i read hers and wanted to make my own!! please check her out she has AMAZING work!!
a/n: first story!! lemme know what i can do to improve and PLEASE leave requests!! love you!!
˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖
me and triplets have been best friends for over 10 years. but me and chris, we just clicked more.
we tell each other EVERYTHING. the only thing we don’t really talk about is our sex life. i don’t find that a bad thing because i am currently 21 years old and still a virgin.
i’ve always been insecure about it, but i just have never seemed to find a good enough guy.
˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖
me, chris, nick, matt, and y/f/n were sitting in the triplets living room. madi was talking to me about some guy she fucked recently.
“and y/n you know how they make that weird sound when they finish?” y/f/n said ranting on and on.
i responded with a quick “mhm”
i hated talking about it. no one really knows i’m a virgin, but i’ve never talked about fucking a specific guy, so i’m sure they had there suspicions.
she was about to say something else when i got up and walked down the stairs to the front door slamming it behind me.
me and the triplets lived right next door so i walked over to my house.
“go check on her chris” nick says sternly and concerned.
chris got off the couch and walked out the door a little after putting his shoes on and grabbing his phone.
˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖
chris arrived at my house that i shared with y/f/n. he pulled out the key i gave him along with matt and nick.
he unlocked the door and heard small sobs coming from my room. he immediately ran to my door and knocked lightly.
“y/n.. can i come in?”
“yeah..”
chris opened the door and walked in. he expression drop immediately when he sees my tear stained face.
“oh y/n.. what’s wrong sweetheart.”
“i can’t tell you.. you’re gonna laugh at me.”
“i would never.. talk to me”
i hesitated before saying it.
“i’m a virgin.” i blurted out.
chris furrowed his brows in confusion. he looked… shocked.
“wha- you’re a- how?!”
“what do you mean how i’ve never fucked anyone!”
“i know what virgin means but like- you’re gorgeous, how does anyone want to fuck.. you?”
“i mean- i’ve been asked but, i’m just- scared.”
“of what?” chris asked genuinely confused.
“i’m just scared ill suck at it, im scared it’ll hurt, and im scared whoever i actually fuck won’t go easy on me..”
he looked at me with a sorry expression. he didn’t know what to say to that but then he said something that really caught me off guard.
“i can fuck you..?” he says quietly, “just to teach you and so you will have experience.. you know?”
i was taken aback by his words. it’s not that i didn’t want to fuck him, but i didn’t want it to make everything awkward for us.
“chris.. i don’t know. what it make things- awkward.”
“don’t worry about that. think of it as a learning experience.”
i laughed lightly at his words.
“what if i suck at it?”
“you’ll be fine.. don’t worry. just let me make you feel good..”
he leans in but before kissing me he says something.
“do i have your full consent..?”
(never do ANYTHING with ANYONE unless you and they both have FULL consent!)
“mhm..”
he finally closed the gap between us. it started off gentle, but quickly turned into an aggressive kiss. our lips moved in perfect harmony and rhythm. it was like our lips were made for each other.
he pulls my shirt over my head and slides him hand up my back to unclasp my bra.
he looks down at my tits and his mouth falls open.
“fuck, y/n. you’re gorgeous.”
he kisses me again and i smile into the kiss causing him to do the same.
he pulls his shirt off and i look down smirking.
“eyes up here, gorgeous.”
i look up at him with the same smirk on my face. he pulls away from the kiss and starts kissing my neck. i let out a soft moan as he reaches my sweet spot.
he eventually wraps his lips around my right nipple and sucks on it lightly, causing me to moan with pleasure.
with him mouth still around my nipple, he pulls off my shorts. i lift my hips up to make it easier on him.
he moves his mouth off my right nipple and moves onto the left one. i gasp at his sudden movement.
he takes off my panties and moves his month off of me.
“alright i’m gonna stretch you out a little so it won’t be as hard to take me” he says smirking
“you’re so cocky, you know that?”
“i’m just spitting facts..”
he lays me down against my bed and spreads my legs.
“once again.. you’re gorgeous.”
he kissing both of my folds causing me to shutter at his contact.
“you ready?”
“mhm..”
he puts two fingers in my pussy and start doing a ‘come here’ movement.
i moan pretty loudly at this.
“oh fuck.. c-chris..”
chris loved hearing me moan and before he knew it, he was hard. like really hard.
after about 45 seconds of his fingers hitting me in my sweet spot, i can feel a knot forming in lower stomach.
“shit ch-chris.. im gonna c-cum.”
i was a moaning mess. he pulled his fingers out.
“save it for me baby.”
baby. i felt butterflies fly around my stomach.
chris took of his boxers and i could see the bulge in his boxers. i could already tell he was big. he then took of his boxer and his member bounced out. like i said, i knew he was big, but i didn’t know he was that big.
“holy shit chris. that’s not gonna fit in me.”
“you’re really boosting my ego, y/n.”
“shut up.”
he aligns his body with mine.
(we’re in missionary!)
“im gonna go slow, ok..?”
“mhm..”
he spits on his hand and slowly start pumping his hand up and down. soon after he pushes his tip in.
a small whimper escapes his mouth along with mine.
“you good..?”
“y-yeah..”
“ok im gonna keep going, ok? let me know if it hurt or if you need a break.”
i nod my head as he’s pushes more of himself in me. a soft moan escapes my lips.
soon after he’s fully in. he lets me adjust to his size.
“im gonna start ok?”
“mhm..”
he starts pumping in and out slowly causing me to moan pretty loud. he is also moaning too.
“fuck, y/n. you’re so tight..”
he starts pumping faster.
“f-fuck ch-chris.. i’m- not gonna l-last long..”
i say shutting my eyes tight and digging my nails into his shoulder blades.
i feel the familiar knot starting to form. i knew i wasn’t gonna last much longer.
chris could feel my walls close around him and he knew that i was gonna finish along with him.
“me too, baby. me to.”
i was moaning pretty loud at this point. i would be surprised if nick, matt, and y/f/n could hear us.
“you re-ready..?”
“ye-yeah”
and with that, with both finished together. i felt his hot liquid fill me up. our moans were a perfect harmony. i could feel his dick twitch inside of me.
“shit y/n..”
we were both panting and he laid on top of me, his dick still in me.
eventually he pulled out.
“so. how was it.”
“re-really good. thank you.”
“anytime”
he said kissing me one more time.
“let’s get you cleaned up.”
˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁ 𖥔 ݁˖ ౨ৎ ˖ ݁
a/n: if you liked this, please follow me/ like/ reblog!! give me some requests!! love youuu!
336 notes · View notes
d3vilcvntz · 8 months
Note
PLSS WRITE MORE LEON 🙏🙏 that’s all im requesting but if you could make something rough w/older leon and younger reader??
Tumblr media
leon s kennedy x top male reader
a/n : reader is around 24 and leon is 34 (10 years age gap). leon is afab again (obsessed with afab leon mb), reader's gender isn't really specified but written to have a dick
you've always looked up to him, he's the reason why you wanted to became a cop in the first place. something about him, attracts you. thankfully, your parents is quite powerful so you got yourself in the same place as him. working with him is your dream ever since he saved you when you were a teen. he might not remember you, but he's been on your mind since then
you were lucky enough to finally get him as your partner later on. all the sweat and tears were all worth it because now you're finally assigned together. actually working by his side feels so unreal for you. after months of being together and you basically flirting with him all the time, it finally happened.
you both were drunk and one thing lead to others. you confessed to him and he accepted, though he did hesitate at first because of your age gaps but still, it very much surprised you that he actually have feelings for you since you entered the agency but never really have the courage to say it to your face. he never really have time for relationships as he was always busy with works, but you were glad that he's willing to be in one with you.
it's your anniversary today, it has been 2 years since you've been together with him and everything went smooth. though, you did ended up arguing with him a few days ago.
it was over some stupid stuff. he keep saying things about how being with someone's old like him isn't really ideal and you should find someone your age. he even suggested for you to see other people that will suit you better, which breaks your heart a little because how can he suggested something like that when he knows that you love him very much :( don't he understand that you only wanted him and he's the only one that's perfect for you ?
but, you do understand his worries, he think too much about what others said. 10 years is a lot to others, but to you? you don't really care, he can be 50 and you'll still love him nonetheless.
and tonight, is the time you'll show him, how much you love him.
you prepared the room with flower petals on the floor, lightly scented candle on top of the bedside table, and a towel laid in the middle of the bed. now you're just waiting for him to come home, sitting on the edge of the bed, playing with your phone
he came home a few minutes later, with flowers in his hands, surprised by your preparations, he gave you a big smile "happy anniversary" he said, passing you the flowers "i..apologise for what i said before. i wasn't thinking right and i know that i hurt your feelings that time" he said, putting his hand on your face "it's okay, i am not mad about it anymore. it's our anniversary, so let's enjoy it to the fullest" you responded, putting your hand on top of his
the flowers he gave you are truly beautiful, but not as beautiful as him, laying on the bed. legs spread, face flushed. you specifically told him to wear a special made lingerie for him. it suits him perfectly, the white laces looks really good on him.
pushing the panties aside to take a look at his pretty pussy. playing with his clit and spreading his hole. it's so wet that you're sure you don't even need the lube. blowing air on it to make him shivered. "hurry" he demanded. he's so cute when he act like this , but you can't give in tonight. you thought of something that you've always wanted to try. suddenly raising your hand and
plap !
the sounds of his wet pussy meets your hand. his eyes were wide, mouth opened, feeling shocked of your sudden moves. you didn't say anything though, just flashed him your usual smile
plap !
"w-wait! stop" he said, trying to push your hands away "hmm you sure? looks like you're enjoying this" you teased him again, putting your fingers in his hole, your fingers sliding in so easily from how wet he is. sweet moans leaving his pretty lips. as he was enjoying it, you pulled your fingers out, which caught him off guard. as he was about to say something, you raise your hand again
plap !
you spank his pussy again "what...? what was that for?" he asked, confused and aroused at the same time. face flushed from embarrassment, he never felt like this before. he had no idea why you're doing this all of the sudden, like you're treating him more rougher than you ever did before. he's not used to this but, he doesn't hate it ♡
you didn't answer, instead, you land another spank on his pussy making him shuddered. he tried to struggle to get away from you but your grip is just too strong !
plap !
again
plap !
and again
plap !
as you spanked his pussy for the last time, he squirted all over your palm. you were shocked to see how he became just from being spanked on his pussy, guess he's really enjoying this.
tears are forming in his eyes, looking up at you. you just flashed him a smile before sitting right above his face, pulling out your dick from your underwear.
"suck" you told him. he was hesitant but did as he told. as he was going down on you, you pushed his head, forcing your cock to the back of his throat.
he was struggling to breath, hands gripping your thighs. you pull out, just to push it all in again. you were using him like a toy.
it felt too good for him, the way your cock reaches all the way to the back of his throat made his mind all blank, all he can think of is your cock ♡ the more you thrusts, the more he feels like he couldn't breath but, don't ever stop, because he's very much enjoying this.
you came deep inside his throat, making him swallowed it all. he knew that you weren't done with him as you grabbed the lube that you specifically put on the bedside and pour it all over your hand. "let's try something new" you said, moving his hair out of his face
before he even had the time to respond to what you just said, you push a finger in his asshole, the excessive amounts of lube making it quite easy to slide in. "feels weird" he whimpered, you shush him, playing with his clit to distract him from this unfamiliar feelings. slowly, you keep adding fingers until you feel like he's stretched enough
you positioned your dick right in his asshole. "w-wait" you slowly pushed your dick inside him, stretching him out. he's still quite tight despite all the stretching you did earlier. his hands gripping the sheets. you kiss him and played with his clit to ease him.
you finally pushed your cock all in, his pussy's juice dripping all over your hand. you started thrusting slowly but becoming rougher and faster as he eventually get used to it
you fingered his pussy as you thrust your dick inside of his asshole. his moans filling up the room "im close" he said, hands gripping your shoulders
you pushed his legs further to his chest, thrusting your dick deep inside him. your thrusts becaming sloppier now that you're close. you came inside him after a few more thrusts and he squirted all over himself right after. he's so easy to squirt <3 you're glad that you laid the towel down on the bed before or you'll have to do extra cleaning later on.
you pulled out and laid beside him, his head on your chest
"what was that all about ?"
he asked, his fingers drawing circle on your chest
"proving my love to you"
973 notes · View notes
eatmyassssssssz · 10 months
Text
Captain John Price
warnings : age gap implied
tags : @lillianastuff @mysticalgalaxysalad @mionacaped @madamemelancholysstuff @mactavishwritings @chaos-reigns-bitches @scribblescubbs @wandasbitch22 @warzxx @wretched-horn-monger @yippeerrrs @applbottmjeens @bowieisbored @blingblong55 @simonrileyscockring
Tumblr media
old man price who struggles to come, he can get it up, but he struggles to come, takes him ages.
hes retired by the military by now, youre his little house husband/wife.
you started to realise you guys have sex a lot less. and when you do, its not really sex. he doesnt get anything out of it. he always makes you come, then goes straight to aftercare.
you worry, maybe he's stopped being attracted to you as he got older. maybe his taste has changed.
you overthink one night, hes fast asleep next to you, snoring. you cant sleep, youre trying not to be too loud with your crying and hyperventilating so you dont awaken your husband (although, nothing could wake up that damn man).
then, you snap. you shake him. until he wakes up. you needed to ask him why he wouldnt have sex with you, when he had a pretty high sex drive a year ago!
was it because you put on a pound or two because of christmas incoming?
either way, hes awake, sat up, half asleep, looking at his partner, having a borderline panic attack next to him.
"whats-, whats wrong?" he says, hurriedly rubbing his eyes to get the sleep out him eyes at least a little.
"why dont you like me anymore!" bit blunt, but you weren't thinking very straight right now, you needed answers, and now.
no matter what the answer was, you needed closure. you needed something to let you decide what you needed to do.
was the "problem" you, or did he just fall out of love?
"what- what do you even mean?" he genuinely did not get what you meant.
"youve not had proper sex with me in ages!" you say, rushed, words not going through your head properly.
his face fades. a soft pink spreads up his neck and ears. "so, its about that.." he mutters.
"am i not attractive enough for you to fuck me anymore? you make me come, then skip the part when you get off, and we go straight to aftercare!" tears were rushing down your face, you hiccuped as you spoke.
"babe- its not you, its me." he says, face in his palm.
"please- nonono, i cant afford for us to split up! i love you- and, and- i dont have any qualifications, i didnt go to college so we could be together forever, john!" your head was rushing to conclusions, your breathing was fast, choked and panicked.
"no! nono, i dont want to split up- i...what i meant was, i literally- it is me thats the problem. i can't- yknow...come." his voice was low, his fingers were massaging his temples, his face was red with embarrassment over this.
"...youre joking? thats why we've not had sex? i thought you were fucking someone else and had nothing left for me or something!" you were relieved, to say the least. "no- babe, i would never."
you nod. "i know- i just..overthink." you admit. he nods. "im aware.." you smile softly. he did know you well. "so..you cant come?" you ask.
he mumbles a response, "i can- just takes...a while...yknow? i can still get hard like i used too- just...not come easily." you smirk hearing that. "so...its possible you can come, just takes a minute?"
"yup."
"..you wanna try that theory?"
529 notes · View notes
romanreignsbae · 2 months
Text
Forbidden Desires - Chapter 1
R.R
Tumblr media
Y/n was always what everyone considered blessed. Now, being the assistant for the tribal chief had it’s perks. For starters, you rode around in his luxurious bus, that only few people were allowed on.
You also, were granted with being able to fly on private jets to get from place to place, as well as exquisite hotel rooms booked and paid for.
Especially your schedule. Roman Reigns wasn't showing up to every pay per view. Not even every Friday night SmackDown. He made appearances when he felt like it. So you were usually home, that didn't mean you were off work, you had other things to handle.
Many people wanted to be you, or at least wanted your job. While these people we’re wanting your job and status, you were wanting the man you worked for, your boss, none other then Roman Reigns.
You’d been working for him for almost 4 years now. Ever since he pursued his heel character, you’d been hired as his assistant. Being his assistant wasn’t nearly as bad as you thought. You thought he’d order you around to do his dirty work, but working for him was nicer then excepted.
All you really did was keep track of his hectic schedule, pack his luggage for him, and follow him around during meetings and travels...even taking care of something he claimed to be more important then work. And not to mention the money was a plus. He paid you better then you deserved, you swore it was favouritism, for obvious reasons.
Over the years you worked for him, you two created a special bond. Yes, he was your boss. But, he was also your friend. You two would often spend time together even during non work related times. You could find the both of you at a bar together. Or having movie nights in each other’s hotel rooms. You loved it. And maybe loved him..
The only problem in your way was the age gap you two shared. You were in your early twenties whereas Roman was on the verge of 40. The age gap wasn’t even a big deal to you. But, if others found out you’d grown feelings for your boss. All hell would break loose. See, Roman, is extraordinarily popular with females.
Like seriously, he has some die hard female fans. Most around your age. If anyone found out about this little crush you’d developed..well..you’d for starters be fired, and your reputation would be completely destroyed.
So here you are, sitting in the tribal chief’s private jet, waiting to land in Las Vegas. “Alright, only about a hour to go” a familiar deep voice spoke. You looked up to see Roman sitting comfortably in his seat, staring intently at you. “Yeah..” you mumbled.
“Whats up with you? You been like this all flight, completely out of it. What’s wrong are you sick? Do you have a fever? The flu? Is- nevermind..” Roman spoke worried. “No no, im good” you spoke as reassuringly as you could. He looked at you skeptically before closing his Macbook and making his way to sit beside you.
He sat beside you and looked at you for a few seconds before speaking up. “What’s planned for today?” he asked you. You quickly opened your Ipad before checking his schedule. “Well..today your free, tomorrow you have a meeting in the afternoon, its a long one” you told him.
“Damn, I hate the long meetings” he spoke with a smile. “They are the worst” you agreed grinning. “Anyways, since i’m free today, why don’t you and I head out, go do something fun together, away from work..you know after we get settled in..” he spoke almost nervously.
You were surprised to say the least. You didn’t think he would wanna spend his free day with you. “Yeah sure. What do you wanna do?” you asked him while trying to hide your growing smile. “Anything you want. Actually you know what? Lemme take you shopping, Las Vegas is known for their malls” he requested with a wink. Your cheeks started heating up.
“Sure” you spoke softly. He smiled at you before striking up new conversation about some investors looking to partner with WWE. It kept yourself distracted from the mess in your mind. Before you knew it, you landed in Las Vegas, and your uber was here to take you and Roman to the hotel.
Once you arrived to your hotel, you and Roman headed to the front desk to get the keys to your rooms.
“I’m sorry sir but, only one room has been booked-” the hotel worker spoke.
“That cant be! You don’t understand, I called yesterday booking two rooms!” Roman spoke roughly at the worker. Your feelings were hurt to say the least. You didn’t think he’d be this avoidant at sharing a room with you, especially after the favor you did him. You instantly felt your heart swelling and tears coming to your eyes.
You refused to cry over this so you grabbed Roman’s arm. “I’m gonna head to the bathroom, i’ll be right back” you spoke softly. Roman slightly nodded his head before going back to barking at the hotel employee.
You took as long as you could trying to get yourself together in the bathroom. You had just arrived is Les Vegas and he was already making you feel like shit. You didn’t even understand what the problem was. Well, deep down you did...you knew he didn't wanna make the same mistake.
You made your way back to the lobby to see a more calm and quiet Roman standing by the elevators.
“So Y/n..they are all booked and it looks like me and you are roommates for the next few nights” he told me. “I’m really sorry..” he added ashamed.
Your eyes widened. Why was he sorry? He didn’t even do anything. Well apart side from almost making you cry, but thats besides the point.
“Roman..why are you sorry? It’s just a room..no biggie” you spoke, plus it's not like you haven't shared one before.
“Because well, I don’t want you to feel like i’m taking advantage of you..and I don’t wanna make things awkward and weird between us..” he went on nervously.
You both knew he was lying straight through his teeth. That wasn't the real reason.
You took his words in before responding. You reached out and touched his arm reassuringly. “Ro, that’s okay, seriously I don’t mind.” you let him know. You'd be careful this time. He smiled at you almost gratefully knowing you understood.
The hotel room the two of you would be sharing was nothing less then absolutely luxurious. But you weren't surprised, the tribal chief always needed the best.
After the two of you settled into your hotel room, Roman called for an Uber to take you two to the mall. Inside the uber Roman and you made small talk back and forth but no one could deny the elephant in the room.
A little secret the two of you shared was up in the air. Something no one could know about...otherwise everything would be ruined. He warned you, if anyone found out what the two of you shared, it was over.
Everything was.
That was the first chapter of forbidden desires that I've been putting off. I have a lot more sitting in my drafts for you guys that'll be out soon. Also what do you think the little secret is? Let me know what you think of this chapter.
191 notes · View notes
beefboyandbabygirl · 1 year
Text
Good Luck, Fermata Tower (18+)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: fire-lookout!seungcheol x female!fire-lookout!reader
genre: firewatch au LMAO, smut (MDNI), soo much angst, COMFORT, fluff
description: after the death of your roommate you have to find a greater purpose to life. what better way than to became a fire lookout with a surprisingly charismatic neighbour tower?
warnings: this fic is a lot, please read ALL warnings. SUICIDE, implied suicidal thoughts, major character death 2x, reader goes through grief, so does seungcheol, AGE GAP, RADIO SEX??? LMAOOO, dirty talk, petnames, cockwarming, pentrative sex, strength kink, f. and m. masturbation (mutual?), PINING TO THE HIGHEST DEGREE, MENTIONS OF DOING DRUGS/DOING SHROOMS, talks of drowning, if u know the game i think you'll be able to visualize the beauty of this way more, intensive writing on the scenery and the emotions, LMK IF I FORGOT ANYTHING PLEASe
quotes from babygirl (@joshibambi): "im getting out lana", "im just gonna be making animal sounds", "can we make this into a play so i can perform this?", "OF ALL THE THINGS THAT COULD MAKE ME CRY IT WAS THE DESCRIPTION OF HIS HOT ASS FACE"
wordcount: 13.9k
a/n: HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEUNGCHEOL. i love this fic. the writing is a little novelly for a fic, but i was so passionate ab this whole firewatch thing and i got SO INTO the arcs and their personal losses and i just really love yn and seungcheol. i hope this was worth the wait and i apologize for not finishing sooner. all my love, beefboy
You and Mingyu meet at college at some parkour club that you’d both joined to make friends. You face-plant into the pavement and knock out a tooth and Mingyu takes you to a nearby hospital. You click instantly. 
You and Mingyu spend every moment together - you help him and he helps you. Mingyu is smart, you realize. He knows all the formulas in your mathematics course by heart. You tell him he’s smart and he says that no one else seems to think that.
You and Mingyu are best friends. You have matching necklaces that complete a heart. 
You and Mingyu party together and when you get too drunk, he carries you down the halls, home. Sometimes at night he sleeps in your bed. 
Your friend group thinks you’re dating, but you think you and Mingyu are something much more earnest than lovers. You think Mingyu is your soulmate. 
You piggy-back ride Mingyu at graduation and you give him a peck on the cheek when he shakes hands with the dean. 
You and Mingyu become roommates. You binge-watch terrible movies together and hold drinking games. It’s hard to admit some of your favorite memories are from watching the Alvin and The Chipmunks trilogy. 
The night before it happens you and Mingyu eat dinner together that he cooked. You see his snaggletooth every time he smiles. 
You’d almost lived together for two years that morning. He usually wakes earlier than you, but he is nowhere to be seen. The apartment is oddly still. You feel trapped. 
You enter Mingyu’s room.
You think he’s asleep. You leave him alone. 
Two hours later you grow worried. You enter his room to find him in the same position. You shake him. Mingyu doesn’t wake. 
The doctors say a case like Mingyu’s is extremely rare - he was in great shape. You’re not sure if that’s supposed to make you feel better. 
Mingyu’s funeral is grim. His death is so terrible, says the pastor, because it’s so domestic. You think it’s terrible because he is - was - the brightest, most amazing person to walk the earth. His parents want you to hold a speech, but you can’t find the words. You think you might sob if you go up there. You sob anyway. The flowers form a ring on the floor of the church and your soulmate is dead.
You can’t sleep anymore. You imagine him dying, left arm numb, alone in the dead of night and choking out your name, reaching for the thin wall that separated you. You cry for a whole month. The apartment is cursed so you live with your parents. 
One day, you see an ad for a job in the paper. 
You take it.  _____________________________
“Hello?” 
Static stormed the tower-house when the other end cut off.
“Are you there?” 
Your eyes frantically darted around the cabin. It was no more than a 13 foot rectangle and yet your tired eyes couldn’t find the radio, churning out a gruff voice. 
You’d just arrived, barely turned on the generator to allow light in. It was nighttime. The park’s dips and peaks were veiled in blue; the silhouettes of the trees, forking out in long, thin spikes, were navy and the lake Fermata was the brightest, glittering pearl from the moon above. Stars twinkled knowingly at you. 
There. A flash of yellow in your blurred vision. You picked up the worn, dirty radio in your heavy hand, pressing at its side. 
“Yeah, hi, I’m here,” you breathed out tiredly. You let go of the button and a small bit of static spoke back to you. 
“Y/n?” 
“Mhm.” 
“I’m Seungcheol. I’m in Bay Valley Tower. It’s to the east. Saw your light turn on,” His voice was gruff, laced with sleep. It had a rasp at every vowel, strings of vocal chords straining to spit out the words in between sticky ropes of bile. 
“It’s nice to meet you,” you said. You had nothing else to say. The flimsy, one person bed beckoned to your tired body. You moved, like a doll, one limb at a time, into its harbor, collapsing into the thin mattress. You laid on your side, moonlight shining in from the window by the door. 
“Yeah, yeah,” he said, carelessly. Impatient in tone, you imagined he’d probably been through this a hundred times before. “So,” he sighed out, deeply. “What’s your problem?” 
“Hm?” 
There was a shooting star, dancing across the sky in that moment. You watched it, shuffling onto your back with half-closed eyes. Stardust sprinkled from it on the open, empty sky.
“People here are all running from something. So what’s your deal?” 
You sighed, watching the star’s open path. It could go anywhere, you thought. Then you moved your arm, holding the receiver to your mouth. 
“Listen, Seungcheol. I’ve been hiking for two days, so I’m gonna go to bed now, okay? Hopefully you’ve found some manners by the time I wake up,” you mumbled, then let go of the button (it had a harsh, grainy texture for some reason), and laid your hand, radio in it, limply at your side. 
You heard a raspy chuckle from the other end. You had no energy to be angry. 
“Alright, Fermata Tower,” there was a smile in the anonymous man’s voice. 
There was a pause. The sound of the fierce breeze carried whiffs of autumn, as it lulled you to sleep. You had almost fallen into a black, snow-buried slumber when you heard the radio crinkle again: 
“Fermata, do you see that shooting star?” 
You had no energy to respond, radio spewing static in your open hand. Thankfully, Seungcheol seemed understanding.
“That’s good luck. So...”
A moment. You and Seungcheol watched the sky-dancer, apart. 
“Good luck.”  _____________________________
“You’re awake!” 
It was Seungcheol’s voice. Transformed by the orange hues of daytime, he sounded much more alive than the night prior. 
“I can see you sitting at your desk.” 
Indeed you were sitting on your desk - a flimsy wooden thing, which looked like it had come form a yard sale - studying the map of the massive park. There were simple cartoonish figures to indicate stresses of trees and drops in the terrain, and rock quarries and waterfalls and lakes. You’d delicately pointed out your own position with red marker, scribbling ‘me’ by it with a heavy child’s hand.
It was cold - the thin boards did not do much to ward away the heavy wind, hooting creeping in the cracks. It smelled like pine needles and tea, as you’d just boiled a lavender on the kettle. IT sat, heating your fingers where it rested beside them in a mug left behind by the previous firewatchman (it read: “don’t talk to me before I’ve had my coffee”). 
The radio clattered against the wood when you clumsily picked it up. 
“Didn’t know when I signed up for this that I would be dealing with a stalker,” you joked, smiling small when you heard the man on the other end let out a hearty laugh. 
“Hey, don’t go labeling me just yet, kid.”
“Kid?!” you said incredulously, dropping the marker that you had been so diligently using to scribble excellent comments on your map (latest was: “maybe cute bears”). “How old are you?!” 
“I’m 37,” Seungcheol said.
“Oof.” 
“Hey!” 
“I’m kidding!” you laughed, dropping your pen and leaning back in your seat. The view was beautiful. You could see the lake, surrounded by a rippling sea of trees, each top reaching for the sky, like you. “I’m 27, I’m getting up there with you.”
“Just a small decade.”
“I’m mature for my age.” 
Seungcheol chuckled on the other end of the radio. You spun around in your chair (it creaked horribly - it sounded like a pig at the sight of a cleaver) surveying each square of the forest from your windows. You narrowed your eyes, trying to spot his lookout tower. 
“How come you can see me but I can’t see you?” you mumbled, now standing to try and see, but it was drowned out by the sheer volume of pinewood. Seungcheol grumbled on the other end: “I should be East.” 
“Yeah, fuck, I forgot to tell you, I think I dropped my fucking compass on the way here,” you ran a hand through your hair and frown. 
“Uh, shit, you’re gonna have to pick up a new one, bud,” he said and you slumped. “Well, if you’re facing the lake - Fermata Lake, I mean - I should be to your left.” 
You followed his instructions. You faced the lake, then took two loggy steps to face left, then squinted incessantly at the horizon. Not dissimilar to a crowd in Times Square, the trees stood toe to toe all across at every inch you spied. The pines zagged upwards like Giza, and culminated into the biggest mountain in the park, just under the sun. The mountain loomed overhead where you finally spotted the lookout tower, like a monster crouched over its prey. You tried to shake off the thought and focus on the lone, floating tower in the pit of pointy trees.
“I see you, Bay Valley,” you breathed into the radio. 
The tower looked much more lonely from so far away. It was different when you were in it, but with the miles-long stretch between you two, you found it looked so small and feeble. You could make out the light turned on within it, a rectangle of burning orange. The shooting star must’ve crossed directly between your two towers. 
“Attagirl,” Seungcheol smiles. “Do you see me waving?”
“No, what the fuck.” 
“I got binoculars.” 
“Ew, you are a stalker!” 
“It’s for bird-watching!” Seungcheol informed you, offense in his tone. You cackled into the radio. “I like watching birds, thank you very much.” 
“Jeez, can’t believe what this job does to people.” 
“I liked bird-watching before I got this job,” Seungcheol said.
“You’re so white,” you grinned. 
“I’m not even white!” 
You and Seungcheol both laughed, joyous hiccups interrupted by bursts of static and 3 miles of rocky terrain and pine needles. You squint at the sun, traversing and dipping under the jagged hedges of the tree-line. 
Your head lolled over to spot between the desk and doorway, where you’d dropped your orange backpack (a peculiar color, come to think of it - same color as the lifejacket they deploy on airplanes when everything has already gone wrong). Now it was flopped onto its side, zipper ripped open and knick knacks and crumbs at its mouth, spilling onto the floor. 
“Where do I get a new compass?” you asked, looking at a yellowed book sat beside the backpack.
“Uh, shit, gimme a sec,” Seungcheol mumbled, and before his radio cut off, you heard, briefly, the itchy scrambling of papers, and the sound made him seem a lot more real. “We have these, uh, supply boxes scattered around. ‘M readin’ this, uhhh, fuckin’ info-thing.. Should say which of them supposedly has a compass.” 
“Sounds like you really know your stuff.” 
“Get off my ass, Fermata.” 
You heard papers rustle again and a small bump before the radio cut off, as if he put the radio down on the table. You awaited, arms crossed over your pink and gray striped hoodie, and staring at sundown. Orange flooded the sky, as if it were all engulfed in flames and this was really hell. 
“Uhhh, okay, I got it! There’s one down at Eleison Valley? The code is 1-2-3-4. That’s actually the code to all of them.” 
“Secure.”
“Shut up.” 
“Well, I can get some exploring done, at least,” you frown, spying a not-so-casual hike on the dotted surface of your map, when you tangoed back to the table, fiddling with the edge of the paper. 
“Yeah. You should probably do it tomorrow though. Sun’s coming down.” 
“Yeah. Can’t believe I slept that long.” 
“Don’t feel too bad about it, kid. I was knocked out for, like, two days after the hike out here. It’s a miracle you’re already awake.” 
“Thanks, Bay Valley,” you sighed, leaning back in your seat with some strained shuffling. You watched, eyes half-lidded as the sun fully disappeared behind the curtain of the park. Its light still roamed the sky, where it hid. Half dark blue, half red, the sky twinkled at you and your insignificance brilliantly. You tried not to think about how lonely and floaty your lookout tower must look from afar. Everything feels big when it’s close enough. 
“You’re welcome, Fermata.” _____________________________
“You think I could eat any of these mushrooms, BV?” 
“BV?” 
“Bay Valley.”
“Ah,” Seungcheol sighed on his end of the radio. You were trudging through the undergrowth in your new hiking boots, lifesaver-colored backpack on the plates of your back, weight pushing through the fabric of your jacket. “No, I don’t think that would be wise.” 
“Damn it. Was gonna get hella high,” you joked, eyeing another cluster of snow-white mushrooms under the shade of a tree, sloping along a gnarly root. Your crunching steps in the loose dirt came to a halt - there was a dropoff. The cliff cut off like a broken chocolate bar and a sharp rockwall supported it to the next layer of earth. 
The path was snaking down towards the lake. You’d circle around and climb up towards Tri Forks Tower, where eventually the climbing heights would bowl into Eleison Valley - a flower field, supposedly (in the map a little flower icon alerted you of this). 
“If I die from this rockwall, please, tell my family I love them,” you grumbled, fetching an itchy, frayed rope from the depths of your backpack. Squinting at the high sun, pale drops of sweat forming around your forehead, you slung it over the hook. The park was littered with these - rusted old things that were leaning forward from years of heavy hikers’ tugging. This one was particularly bent. 
“You’re so dramatic,” came Seungcheol from the speaker. 
“Am not, man, these rocks are like fucking knives!” 
“Such a drama queen. A real Primadonna.”
You huffed and puffed as you lowered yourself down the cliffside. Your boots pressed flat against the jagged rock, biceps burning as you held yourself up and walked down the side of it. The whole world was with you, sideways, and you would’ve stopped to appreciate it were you not sure you would pass out doing so. 
“Holy shit,” you said to yourself when you were finally on stable ground and not spider-manning the mineral deposits of the park. You put your hands on your hips and squinted at its imposing open jaw. 
“You down yet, Queen B?”
You panted, grimacing, when you tugged the rope hard and it leapt down like a flying snake: “Yeah, I’m down.” 
You continued padding through the forest. The earth was dry and it was summer, but the wind was harsh and it cooled your stovetop-skin as you walked along a rock quarry, Fermata Lake hiding behind the covers of huge, flat bulwark. You listened to the cacophonous call of the forest: rustling leaves and birds. 
“I had a friend - uh, friend of a friend, actually - who, like, got high as fuck off mushrooms and had a bad trip,” you said, mouth to the mic of the radio, as you studied the cover of the leaves. 
“Yeah? What happened?” Seungcheol hummed. 
“She said that, like -- fuck,” you breathed, scrambling over a particularly rocky rock. “She said there was, like, like her house flooded. Like, water just came gushing in and the whole house was, like, underwater suddenly and she.. She thought she was gonna drown. And her fuckin’ kitchen turned into, like, a coral reef or some shit, I don’t know.” 
“Shit,” Seungcheol seemed much more alert now. You heard him put something down on his table (you imagined it was just as shitty as your own). “I didn’t even know that was possible.” 
“It’s fucking crazy. Don’t do drugs, man.” 
You turned past the quarry and was met with the sight of the huge, gaping hole of Fermata Lake. Strangely oval, the lake was flanked on all sides with thick pineland, except for a slight angle where grassy hills turned upwards towards Tri Forks Tower. 
The water was much more green up close. Algae sloshed up the side of the gravel-earth, willing you into the murky depths. 
You stared at it for a while. You thought maybe you could make out someone standing at the bottom of the bowl-shape.
“I’m at Fermata Lake,” you said then, and then started walking again. 
“Good job! And you haven’t even died at a drop off yet,” Seungcheol joked and you laughed. 
“God, you’re such a jerk. I bet you’re fuckin’.. Watching birds right now like a nerd.” 
“Okay, rude-” 
“Why don’t you go outside and be productive?” 
“I’m looking for fires,” Seungcheol snarked back. “The binoculars are multi-use.” 
You let the conversation die down for a bit, focused on the walk. It was peaceful when you let it be, but at times you came to feel like you were being swallowed alive, or like the looming figure of Aluralura Mountain was pressing its boulder-brawn in between your shoulder blades. The air in the forests was thicker, so you stayed persistent in your path, as you climbed up the clearings and spotted Tri Forks in the distance. 
“Hey, uh, Y/n?” 
The sudden intrusion of Seungcheol on the radio had you jolting, dropping the radio into the earth (thankfully it was fine - here the earth was softer and it dipped under your boot and water pressed out from the mull). You bent over and picked it back up. 
“Jesus, you scared the shit out of me!” you scolded, wiping mud off the yellow plastic of the radio.
“Oh, uh, sorry..” 
It was only then that you noticed a meekness in Seungcheol’s voice. You, of course, had not the furthest idea what he looked like, but he sounded like he was holding a knife behind his back. You furrowed your brows and stared down the radio, as if it would give you answers. There was dirt clamoring the yellow, where your fingers had held on.
“What’s up?” you said and sounded fakely bright. 
“Well, I just-” he cut himself off with a cough, one that reached those stringent, thinning vocal cords and brought back the rasp. “I wanted to apologize. For the other night. I mean, when you came to the tower.” 
You didn’t respond, only furrowed your brow and looked out across the sun-lit moor. There was a deer traversing across the grass. 
“Uhm. Because. I was- I was kinda drunk, uh, when you came, and I know I was kinda pushy about, you know, why you came out here and all that.” 
“OH!” you exclaimed and the noise ended in a laugh. “Please, Seungcheol. Don’t worry about that. It’s fine.” 
“Okay, good,” he mumbled. 
The flower field came into view after climbing a particularly steep hill and it was a flower field - not just cartography myth. 
It was all sunflowers and catmint - a huge, long stretch of purple and yellow splotches, stemming from green, untamed grass - stretching as far as you could see, disappearing into a hill at the far horizon. You were sure the smell of pollen went for miles, flowerdust sprinkling the air in heavy coats. The path you were following split the field in two, a dry, boring gravel streak, but you saw, faded from sunlight, a once deep, now light, ashy brown box at the right side. 
“I found it!” you shrieked into the radio, a newfound strength gearing your legs into a sprint. “Fuck, yes!” 
“Good job, Fermata!” there was a smile in his voice. 
“Thank you!” 
You were also smiling, when you went up to it. It was rectangular and made of planks, held together by a metal loop and a padlock. Like everything else, it was dirty and ravished, and you felt a faint worry at the sight of scratch marks on its side. You clicked in the code: 1-2-3-4. 
The interior of the box was mostly empty. To your horror the first thing you saw was a porn magazine, which you did not dare to touch; then you saw a granola bar, which you did touch and stash away in your backpack, without any regard for how old it may have been; then came the compass, small and cheap metal and pointing out that you were, in fact, facing Northwest.
There was another item in the box. You did not initially see it, as it was taped to the interior of the lid, but when you raised your eyes, you saw it. It was a piece of paper - a note. 
Grimacing, you ripped it off where it was blowing violently in the wind, holding it tight between your fingers and smudging dirt along the untainted white. 
It read: 
‘Hey, Cheol. If you head up the path there’s a family of raccoons! I left this granola bar here so you could feed them! From Jun.’
“Hey, Seungcheol?” you said absently, staring over the blue, scribbled ink, worn out from months of rainwater dripping in through the planks. He hummed on the other end of the line. “There’s a note here for you. From a, uh, Jun?”
“Oh.”
There was a pause that you couldn’t decipher - maybe you could have, had you been there with Seungcheol. Maybe if you could read his face, his body, you could’ve known what it meant. But for now you just stood in the breeze. It was picking up, getting angrier, hurling at your clothes and hair, banishing you from the field. The flowers dangled uselessly. 
“Do you want me to read it to you?” 
Silence. 
“No, not really.” 
“Oh, okay. Uh, who’s- who’s Jun?” 
Silence. 
“The guy who used to work in Fermata Tower. Before you.” 
“Oh.” 
Every second was longer than the last. You wish you knew what it all meant, but you sensed in Seungcheol’s curtness that he was not taking questions currently, and so you looked around the quickly graying sky and the suddenly spiteful wind and folded the note away in your jacket pocket. 
“I’m gonna head back now,” even your voice was rocked by the wind. 
Seungcheol didn’t respond. 
You left Eleison Valley alone.  _____________________________
This was where it was supposed to be - greatness. Not success, but something greater, larger, more alive than you could ever be. You thought you’d find it in the mountains, the valleys, the lakes and the forests and maybe that had been naive of you - to think that nature and earth could give any sort of meaning that death had taken away from you. These shadowed parts only served to make you feel smaller, you realized. The mountains glared at you, the forests swallowed and spat you out. 
You couldn’t sleep. The image of Mingyu’s outstretched hand was back and you could almost see him from your flimsy bed, lying on his back with a tanned hand out for you. You left him alone, just like you always had. 
Burrowed under the veil of your thin blanket, grabbing at it with clumsy hands, you turned your back to Mingyu’s corpse on your floor.
A prickle sauntered up your back. It was that emotion that something was creeping closer, something was out to get you. That you would feel a cool, dead hand on your back and when it would spin you around his face would be there, and he’d look nothing like himself; he’d be pale and purple around the mouth and his eyes would be sunken and dark and all the glitter he possessed - that he used to possess - would be gone and something menacing, like a hungry mountain, would have replaced it. 
You thrashed, suddenly, to look back at the corpse. It was still there. Hadn’t moved an inch. Deja vu. 
Thoughtlessly, desperately, you fumbled for the radio wrapped up the sheets of your bed. Your fingertips found the plastic hardware, and it bounced at your eagerness, before you pulled it along the sheets and up to your mouth. 
“Seungcheol?” you gasped. 
When did you start crying? You decided you must’ve been crying all night and maybe you’d cried so much that your brain had stopped registering the feeling of wet tears. 
There was a pause. A long one. So long, you started to really become aware of the cries of the wind, the patter of the rain and the endless mumbling of the trees (and the gargled, bubbling blood rising from Imaginary Friend Mingyu’s half-open mouth). Then static spoke back to you: 
“Yeah?” his voice was so raspy, you registered that you must’ve awoken him from his sleep, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. Your nails dug into the radio and you pressed it into your chest, holding on tight. 
“I can’t sleep,” you whispered, words full of shaky air. There was another pause and for a second you feared that Seungcheol might’ve gotten angry and gone back to bed. But he spoke again.
“Are you okay?” You heard rustling on his end, and you imagined him standing up from the bed, looking out at your lonely island of a lookout tower. “Do I need to trek over there?” 
“No!- no, I couldn’t ask you to do that,” you protested, then trailed off. 
“... Are you crying?” 
You squeezed your eyes shut: “I just- d’you remember what I said? About my- my friend’s friend who- who had a bad mushroom trip?” 
“Uh, yeah, I remember. Her- Her house flooded, right?” Seungcheol’s voice was tainted with thorough confusion, but not annoyance. Never annoyance. 
“Well, I just-” you sputtered and sighed. You almost wanted to stop talking and give up when Seungcheol stayed quiet on his end and drew the words forward: “It’s so stupid. Sometimes I just- I just feel like that. Like you’re drowning, everywhere you go. You know?” 
Your voice was stringent with nervousness, and you picked at your nail, wrapped around the radio in the shallow dark. 
“It’s not stupid, sweetheart,” he mumbled. It was amazing to you how gruff and tough Seungcheol turned soothing and caring so fast. The nickname felt like a warm hug, and you almost didn’t register the sound of fabric rustling once more. “I’m coming over.”
“N-No!” you gasped sharply. Your eyes flickered down. Mingyu watched from the floor, eyes glazed over from death. He smelled foul.
“Can you.. Can you just- talk to me?” you whispered helplessly, and Seungcheol quieted down, seemingly weighing your proposal. 
“Okay. Okay, sweetheart, I’ll talk to you,” Seungcheol whispered soothingly, and for God’s sake, you didn’t even know what he looked like, but the rasp in his voice, and the comfort and warmth that sung out the speaker of the radio had your heart clenching in your chest. “What do you wanna talk about?” 
“Um, I don’t know,” you sniffled. Seungcheol only softened his voice and sat, awake in the middle of the night, comforting you.
“Can I tell you about birds?” 
He told you about birds for 45 minutes before you fell asleep (something he had predicted would happen); he told you about how pheasants are known for their striking colors and how they have excellent eyesight; he told you how he saw a nightjar just before going to bed that night, and how they’re incredibly hard to spot; he told you about Barrow’s Goldeneyes, and how they’re the funniest little guys, and he loves them, because they glow purple in the sunlight; he told you about g…
Oh. You must’ve started dozing off.  _____________________________
You weren’t sure when it changed, but at some point you looked out the window, and the mountain looked a lot more like yourself. 
You were getting better, happier, you were waking up with more energy, you were bubblier. You weren’t entirely sure you could blame it on the park though. For two months you’d had your job and for about two months, every once in a while, you’d radioed Seungcheol at night, and without any question, he’d tell you about birds. 
It sounded stupid the more you thought about it, but his voice lulled you into a comfortable sleep even on Mingyu’s most insistent nights. 
You’d wake up and patrol your area, then you’d settle back in for a couple of hours, watching out for fire hazards and guests in the park, before you’d patrol one more time. Then you’d go to bed. 
This was not the type of job you took to make friends, but somehow Seungcheol had become the reason you woke up everyday. Everyday you looked forward to walking through the woods with his voice on your radio, and you looked forward to making him laugh and him making you laugh. 
“Seungcheol, I’ve got eyes on what I’m pretty sure is a Red-breasted Merganser, come in.” 
This morning you were up extraordinarily early - for you, that is. You weren’t certain what exactly prompted this early rise (maybe you were finally sleeping right thanks to a certain rough-throated man?), but nonetheless you’d enjoyed the view of dawn along the undergrowth and had eaten half-warm oatmeal in bed with an open book. Now you were bored and craving the attention of your only forest-companion. 
Seungcheol didn’t respond like you were expecting though. When the radio crinkled in response, you heard him panting on the other end and thumps, like he was picking it up off the floor. 
“That’s… That’s great, Fermata. I’ve gotta get my.. My binoculars out,” he heaved for air and fumbled clumsily with the sensitive mic. You cringed at the sound. 
“What are you doing? Why are you so out of breath?” you asked. A twinge of worry slipped out in your tone. Was he okay? 
“I’m, uh, working out,” Seungcheol chuckled, and he seemed to finally regain composure, clearing his throat sheepishly. “You’re not usually awake to hear it.” 
“You work out every day?” 
“Sure do - gotta be prepared to knock out a grizzly,” he grunted. 
You leaned back in your seat, a less than amused expression on your face, because a twirling strand of fire danced up your chest and settled into your cheeks. Why was it suddenly so hot? Fire spread across your nerve endings and twinged you red in the apples of your cheeks. You ran your hands over your face to soothe the sizzling.
This was ridiculous, you thought. Seungcheol was not making you blush. You didn’t even know what he looked like! He might as well have had an eye patch and a mohawk. But even as you halfheartedly scrutinized yourself, your thoughts clouded over the idea of sweet, attentive, raspy Seungcheol with big arms and thighs and a sculpted chest and-
“Are you- are you, like, buff?” 
The question left your lips before you could stop it. Your voice broke halfway through the sentence and you let go of the button with an embarrassed hiss, like a kettle huffing out air. The embarrassment, that was potent and squeezing at your chest, worsened when you heard Seungcheol’s throaty chuckle on the other end, limp and dry. 
“You’re curious today, aren’t you?” he mused then, smirk clear from the tone and pronunciation of the words, and you squeezed your eyes shut because why was his voice and the thought of him and the warmth coming through the radio speaker suddenly bothering you so much?
The truth was you hadn’t masturbated in months. With everything going on, you simply hadn’t felt the urge or the want. But, it occurred to you, now that you were slowly becoming a functioning human once more, the urge was returning hot and fast in your core, and, of course, your only companion with the raspy voice and the attentive words and the apparently muscly body was bringing forth this urge with ease. 
You pressed down the urge, taking a deep breath before you pressed the button once more. You were not going to masturbate to the thought of Seungcheol - not Seungcheol who you only knew by voice, who had been nothing but caring and sweet to you. You could not corrupt the preciousness of your companionship with your lewd, depraved thoughts. 
“I’m just curious what you look like. Unlike you, stalker, I don’t have binoculars!” That sounded a lot more like the you that had not just gotten wet at the thought of Seungcheol’s bulging muscles. 
“Hey! The power of the binoculars is limited. I can only really see your silhouette, nothing fancy,” he defended and then right as you were about to respond, he knocked the wind out of you again: “And yes, I’m pretty buff, if I do say so myself.”
Ugh. 
You went the rounds that day and got through another day without having to complete fire protocol, ending out the evening with a pack of instant noodles your family had so graciously sent you (Seungcheol scolded you: “That has no nutrients!”). However each step through the forest and each slurp of noodles and page of your book was plagued by the latent fire inside you. A burning occupied your abdomen fueled by the echoing morning voice of Bay Valley Tower. 
By nightfall you gave in. You were only a girl. This didn’t have to change anything, you thought, as the park turned plum purple. You settled into bed in your pajamas, sitting upright against the frail wood wall and letting your hair bunch on the rattling plate of glass. Your eyes moved to and fro, bouncing over the now lived-in cabin and taking in the dark void of the farest corner. 
Briefly, you fiddled with your radio in your palm. You could call Seungcheol and- wait, why would you do that? No, no. You packed away that wicked thought - it only served to make you feel more guilty. No, instead you slid down the wall to lay in your pillow, now positive you were alone. 
An owl hooted outside and you slipped your hand into your underwear. 
It was surprisingly easy to surrender your consciousness to the lust (and you had, God bless your soul, stayed wet throughout the entire day). It clouded you over, as you began rubbing up and down your pussy, ghosting over your clit to dip down to your glazed slit. Your eyes squeezed shut and you conjured your best doll-replica of Seungcheol.
In your dream he was a faceless mist, but he had a carved upper body, and from the fog surrounding his head spewed his voice - dripping in warmth and comfort, as you imagined it was his toned arm reaching between your legs and pumping into you.
Your other hand snaked down to your clit, where your hips canted off the bed. In the whirl of thrusting into yourself and rubbing tight circles in your clit, you realized, lip bitten raw under your prying teeth, that there was no reason to hold back your moans. It was only forest and wasteland for miles - and surely Seungcheol would not hear you in his floating snow globe. 
“A-ah, Seungcheol,” you wantonly murmured, burying your head in your pillow and sighing lazily. A flush had crept up your neck, where your chest expanded to allow for air. The pleasure was immense - probably more intense, since it had been quite a while - warmth spreading in your lower stomach and culminating at your throbbing clit. Recklessly, you moaned and thrashed as you fucked yourself on your fingers, hiking towards your orgasm. “Seungcheoool-”
“Y/n?” 
You froze. 
Maybe you’d imagined it. Still, your fingers were stopped in their tracks, simply resting on the warmth of your folds, itching to continue. You sat up in bed and tried to ward away the creeping panic. Your heart began to gallop to the beat of a siren. 
The air had been starched when you finally pulled your hand out of your underwear, hot cheeks and glistening hands all over, when you began searching for the radio.
“Y/n, are you okay?” 
You had your back hunched over the edge of the bed, searching for the little yellow receiver, when his voice came again in a thick forest of static. You snapped your head to under your comforter, where the noise was slightly muffled. 
In a blurred panic, you threw the comforter off of you and spotted the small radio by your calf, and you scrambled to pick it up. When the dirty plastic touched your cheek, you stopped, sighed a shaky, hot breath, and closed your eyes. 
“Yeah, I’m, uh, I’m fine. What’s up?” you let go of the button and cringed at your own disheveledness, the breath and shake in your voice. You pressed your forehead radio-front in a silent prayer. 
There was a hesitance to Seungcheol when he spoke next: “... You were calling for me, you sounded in pain?” 
This was certainly the worst thing he could’ve said. You would’ve rather he told you he spotted a bear at the foot of your tower, trying to eat you! You must’ve accidentally kicked the radio and hit the button, you decide, and you damn yourself for keeping it in the bed - of course, shit like this would happen!
“I was…-” (If only you were a better liar), “- pranking you…” 
Seungcheol huffed out in amusement on the other end and you wanted to jump off the railing to the lookout tower and break your neck. “You were pranking me?” 
You gulped with a decidedly dry mouth. “It was a bear attack prank.” 
Seungcheol was smiling: “Yeah?” 
You were not: “Yeah.” 
There was an entropic silence, where you thoughts came rambled and pleading in your head: Please, just let this go, please, just let this go, let’s pretend it never happened, let’s-
“You wanna know what I think you were doing?” 
Seungcheol’s voice had dropped an octave. The smile in his voice was gone and there was something menacing and commanding about him now. In the moment, overcome with a cocktail of guilt and shame, you could not discern if this was anger or lust - the first seemed fitting. 
“I think you were fucking your little fingers thinkin’ about me,” he hummed and in response you whined and squeezed your eyes shut. The shame encapsulated you. “Shh, shh, calm down, I’m not mad, honey.” 
Blinking through rapidly forming tears, you opened your eyes to stare, dumbfounded, at the radio (as if it were Seungcheol and you were not several miles apart). “Really?” 
“Not mad at all. Jus’ think you should’ve told me if you wanted my help,” he tutted on his end and, God, he was so nurturing and comforting and he knew it, and it was so sexy. Your pussy, which had vaguely throbbed from the negligence throughout, was now screaming for your attention, hole clenching sadly around nothing. 
“I thought you wouldn’t want-” 
“You’re crying again, baby,” he must’ve noted from the hoarseness of your voice and the sniffles that accompanied every syllable. 
“Just want you so bad,” you sobbed, now shamelessly slipping your hand back into your underwear and sighing dazedly in relief when you touched it again. 
“Need Seungcheol to take care of you, huh?” The smile in his voice was back. 
“Yeah.” 
“Bet you don’t want me talking about birds now, hm?” he chuckled (at his own joke), voice low and raspy. “Are you touching that pretty pussy?” 
“Mhmm,” you responded lazily, floating high on the sound of his voice and jolts of electricity they sent as you worked up a pace on your clit once more. The pain of the interruption ebbed away. 
“Good girl, hm?” He knew. “Getting off to the sound of my voice, eh? Don’t even know what I look like.” 
“Hng- k-know you’re b-buff,” you gritted out, voice coming in sharp breaths. Your body moved languidly, back arching off the bed and hair coming out in choppy strands on your pillow. Seungcheol scoffed out a laugh: “Like knowing I could just fold you in half? Fuck you into tomorrow? Hm?” 
You let out a loud, dumb whine of his name. It was a total inability to get over his words; how melodious it was, and yet, how contradictory the smoothness of his words were to the strained nature of his thrumming voice. And the worst of it all was how confident he was - you supposed hearing someone else masturbate to you would be a confidence boost - and how the arrogance swelled out in the most comforting, nurturing way. Each word felt like a hand on your body, like a caress that sent shivers down your spine. 
“Fuck, princess, say my name like that again. Please.” 
“Seungcheol!” you obliged mindlessly, legs shaking on either side of your glistening hand. 
“Shit, I-” he grunted, and you heard a fumbling of fabrics on his end. Your nerves spun in excitement at the thought of him getting hard at your voice. “Can you put two fingers in the pretty pussy - it’ll feel like one of mine, baby.” 
You cried out when your fingers entered yourself, pads of your fingertips rubbing against your walls. Outside of the windows, the park was an empty wasteland of mauve and orchid, and the Fermata lake was brilliantly alive and dipping under the three-quarter-moon. 
“Wish it was your pussy wrapped around my cock right now,” he grunted, and he’d lost breath and composure and if you knew what his face looked like, you would imagine it sweaty and twisted up and a red-lipped ‘o’ letting the jaw slack. 
Resuming your earlier motions (double-handing your own kitty), you felt your orgasm lurking in the pit of your stomach, a tight-wound knot being ripped apart. You were panting into the cool air, creating silver-clouds in your tower-home. “A-ah, want you inside me so bad, Cheol- shit! Gonna- gonna cum-” 
“Yeah? You gonna cum thinking about my cock inside you baby? Thinkin’ about me just bouncing you up and down like my little fuckdoll?” His speech ended in the prettiest moan you’d ever heard, and you imagined every well-defined, flexed muscle under the moonlight and the thought had your whole body jerking and shaking and when you closed your eyes the stars stayed with you, white and glimmering under your eyelid. 
The strangled moans of your orgasm sent Seungcheol over the edge - at least from what you could tell. His dirty talk turned into strings of curses and moans and grunts until the radio went dead, and all you could hear was your own labored breaths and the faraway hooting of a horned owl. 
The silence flatlined the excitement into nervousness. Your lip was almost automatically caught in your teeth and you glanced over the radio beside you through your lashes.
Oh shit. What the fuck had you done?
“Uh, did you-” the smell of sweat shot up as you shuffled in your sheet to grab the radio once more. “Did you, uh, cum?” 
Oh fuck. You just made it way worse.
The silence from the radio was much louder than any response, but when the receiver did finally crinkle with static, the sound of laughter exploded from it.
“Don’t fucking laugh at me, BV,” you scolded, but you were smiling and relief flooded you like water overflows Fermata Lake during heavy downpour. 
“I’m sorry,” he hiccuped on the other end. “It’s just-.. ‘DID YOU CUM?’” 
“Alright, I’m going to bed now. You suck,” you quacked, and even though you were alone you thought to suppress the gentle tugging at your lips into a sharky smile. 
“DID YOU CUM?” 
He sounded pretty when he laughed.  _____________________________
“I can’t believe I have to hike down here to confiscate some fireworks.” 
Your grumble came from the forest beside Fermata Lake. You were walking down a patch of dirt revealed from years’ of trampling feet, dewy sprigs of grass arching into the mud. A group of (presumably) teenagers were firing fireworks down near the edge of your assigned territory. 
“They’re a fire hazard!” Seungcheol squawked obviously, and you huffed in your boots, preparing to climb down a rocky slope. 
“I know that! It’s just everywhere - the website, the signs - don’t use fireworks!” you complained. Seungcheol hummed absently on the other line: “Go teach those suckers a lesson, Fermata!” 
“I will,” you said, agitated. 
“Just don’t fuck with their personal belongings. Last thing we need is a lawsuit. Again.”
“I won’t,” you said, deflated. 
Even in your most angered moments, you could hand yourself over to the gentle forest. No longer were you protruding into a bubble, straining to get through a barrier that was urging you out, but you were absorbed into it, like you were one of its own. 
The forest was lush with pines and brown and green moss painting bark and rocks, and the grass leapt higher than your knees, as you trudged further and further in. 
SWOOOOSH!
A firework propelled into the sky about 100 meters away, and you watched its ignited trails of smoke before it exploded into a fest of sparkling blue and gold. You huffed out in anger at the sight. The sky wasn’t even fully dark - it was merely a muted blue evening. 
“Did you see that?” Seungcheol came from the radio-speaker. 
“Yeah, I’m right with them.” 
As you padded closer the smell of wet pine cones and coltsfoot accompanied the sound of distant voices - indeed, they sounded juvenile. You could make out at least two girls and at least one boy, although their voices were hard to distinguish, the way they echoed in between the grid of trees.
“Hey!” you yelled, as you creeped just close enough. Their voices hushed and you saw their frightened faces lit by handheld, Target-bought flashlights when you peeled back the screen of a bramblebush. They were gathered together amongst a tent, flashlight lighting the plates of the faces ablaze in cool white.
“Cut it out with the fireworks, alright?” you huffed and your anger melted a little when you saw that they were indeed just kids - maybe 19? They seemed to have nothing to say, and so you scanned the beer cans and the scattered backpacks and finally caught sight of a bundle of rockets in the grass. Your brows furrowed, and you picked it up with a sternness. 
“Hey, that’s ours!” one kid chimed, but he made no move to stop you, really, as you trudged angrily back to the bush you had come from. 
“Not as long as you’re in our park, man. It’s a fire hazard.” 
“We’ll take them back home-” 
“Goodnight!” The desperate plea fell on deaf, tired ears. You just wanted to eat dinner, so you disappeared out on a trail of pine needles and valiantly ignored the trail of curses and insults following you. You could care less. 
“I got the fireworks, Seungcheol,” you sighed tiredly and your eyes were dark pits and your face was relaxed, if only to conservative energy. 
“Good job, Fermata.” 
You were not in the talking mood. Maybe Seungcheol could tell by your tone of voice; maybe he could hear it in your sigh; but Seungcheol piped up again: “You know, if you need some energy for the hike back, there’s a supply box - uhh, 52? - if you head upwards instead of towards Fermata Lake.” 
You wanted to be grumpy, you really did, but the thought of a salivating, expired, delicious, out-of-date granola bar had you changing course to the slowly gaining hill of the forest. 
It was weird. This was probably the closest you’d ever been to Seungcheol’s tower. Under the prickly cover of pine some mile in the distance, you could see a glowing square, perched over the treetops by long, wooden pillars, support beams crossing the middle. You couldn’t help but wanna go up to it. There had been an unbearable magnetic pull to his tower ever since that night however long ago. You decided to stay the course for Supply Box 52. 
“I can practically see you from here,” you commented, and the tower was becoming a beacon as the evening mulled darker and darker by the minute. 
“Really? Hang on,” he did not let go of the radio-button, and so you had the pleasure of listening to the ruffling of fabrics and thumps on the floor. “Can you see me flexing in the window?” 
“You’re such a dork,” you laughed, and the sound bounced off the pines and traveled up to the rock of the nearby Aluralura Mountain. “No, I’m not quite that close.” 
“Damn it!” 
“Yeah, it‘s a real shame,” you muttered, smiling, and then you caught sight of the supply box up ahead. The hill flattened out once more (to which you breathed a sigh of relief) and the box was perched on the edge facing the path that began onto the cliffs. This was Seungcheol’s territory - cliff sides and all. “I think I see Supply Box 52.”
“Open that bad boy up.” 
You entered the code, scrolling the mechanisms one by one until the numbers read 1-2-3-4 (you still thought this combination was ridiculous), and when you opened the lid it creaked horribly, worn from the weather. 
The wind was harsh that day, and a note, identical to the one you’d found at Eleison Valley, broke off its tape from the mean pushes of the wind. Instinctively, you grabbed it as it started to fly off, and your hand closed around it and crinkled it under your fingers. You looked at it with knitted brows. 
Wordlessly, you tucked it in between your side and your arm, redirecting your attention to the goodies in the supply box. 52 held a rope and a map and another directory for supply boxes and, to your exhausted delight, a box of grandma-looking caramels. You took the whole thing and stuffed it into your bag. 
As you shuffled, you put the note between your lips, stuffing the plastic container of gold-wrapped, sugary candies in between your rope and your own map and a coat for possible rain. When you zipped it up, the fabric of the bag warped grotesquely to fit the various items you’d brought. 
You pulled the note back out from your lips. A small wet patch of spit lingered on the paper, as you unfolded it. 
It read: 
‘Hey Seungcheol,
If you find this, I gotta go be with my mom now. I’ll miss you forever.
From Jun.’
The wind blew kisses on your back like the presence of a ghost.
“You find anything good?” Seungcheol’s voice peeked through the static of the radio. It had been quiet for a while. You couldn’t take your eyes off the letter. The ink was smudged and slurred. 
“Uh, caramels, actually,” you said, eyes dancing over each slope of ‘forever’. “Like, granny caramels.”
You put the letter away.  _____________________________
A week later and you were looking out of the window at pouring rain. The sky was smothered by a duvet of dark gray clouds, and the rain was coming harder than you’d ever seen. It was like thousands of bullets pelting into the ground and turning it soft and muddy, and the drops hit your roof like the nonstop click of a keyboard. 
"Rainy season, huh?” your mouth was to the radio. 
“Yeah. We’re gonna be staying up all night to watch out for lightning. Fire hazard.” 
“Shit, I should make coffee.” 
“I’m way ahead of you.” 
The lightning came and thunder followed. The sound was enormous and terrifying. It grumbled like a hungry beast and the sound bounced off of every mountain-wall and echoed from all sides. You felt very small, wrapped up in a blanket at your desk, a steaming cup of coffee by your side and your fire extinguisher evacuated from its holder to stand beside you, all red and shiny aluminum and rubber nozzle. 
“Did that look like it hit a tree?” you asked after seeing a zig-zagging bolt of lightning hanging a little too low over the crowns. Your voice was louder than usual - this night was a game of overpowering the screaming rain. It was some 1 AM.
“Uhhhhh, shit. Maybe. We’d see the fire, but it’s possible it’s at the root.” 
“Fuck,” you whispered. “Was that yours or my area?” 
“Uhhhhh-” 
“I’m gonna check it out.” 
Determined, you let the radio fall on the table, as you fumbled for another sweater. The knitted fabric slipped over your other sweater, and then you were wrapping yourself up in your raincoat.
“Maybe I should go - it’s slippery right now, it’s dangerous as fuck. You could fall and hit your head, you know. I think it was closer to me anyway, so--” 
“Seungcheol, I already have my coat on, I’m going!” 
And indeed you were going, despite the grumbled protests of Seungcheol. Your coat blew in the hurricane wind as you stood atop the cliff, looking down at the cascading water, that’d all race down to the sinkhole that was Fermata Lake. Through the clouds, there were no stars to trade glances with, not even ghosts.
You fought headwind the entire way, your hair flowing wildly and your coat threatening to unbutton at the will of the blasts. The ground under your rainboots had become mud and the further you trudged into the forest, the more the mud crept up your yellow shoe, slinging over you like liquid ropes. 
“I’m going down the drop off again!” you were screaming to overpower the wind, radio to your mouth before you dropped it into your pocket and retrieved your bag to regather your rope. 
“Be careful!” Seungcheol commandeered bitterly, muffled from your pocket. “It’s slippery as shit! Radio me immediately when you’re down, so I know you’re okay.” 
Even as your face grew wet and sore from the whipping rain, you scoffed. A gloved hand shoved into your pocket, brought the radio back up to your red lips: “Stop being such a pussy!” 
“Say yes, Y/n!” 
You rolled your eyes. “Aye, aye.”
“... I’ll take that, asshole.” 
Wet as a wipe, you slung your rope over the hook and prepared it in a slew of motions you’d by now memorized. Although, you noted your movements were awkward, somewhat impaired by the layers of fabric that encased you. Stubborn, you stood before the hook, grabbed onto the rope, and began walking backwards. 
Your booted foot curled around the edge of the cliffside, and with the tightened rope you began your careful horizontal walk. Raindrops pelted your face like a clenched fist, but you only blinked away the water and tried to focus on stepping carefully down the side of the rockface. 
KRRRRRRRRKKKKKK!
You screamed girlishly when your rope snapped from the hook, and you watched it come flying out over the ledge, before you realized, horrifically, you were already falling. 
It was barely a second, just one blurry image of the weeping sky, before you were on the ground, groaning in pain. A pulsing ache creeped up your spine, and you twisted your body in the mud to put the weight on your side. You sighed into the mud, dirt on your squished cheek. 
The rain was uncaring of your unfortunate situation, as you laid pathetically in the dirt, body scrunching up like an elastic, while your shadow was cast by sudden bursts of lightning. Panting, you pushed yourself up by your arms and felt blindly for your-
Where was your radio? 
Your pocket was deflated and empty, and you scrambled in the dirt, desperately, pushing yourself up completely to scan the area. You noted how the pain subsided into a small, dwindling soreness, thanking whatever God for your layers of clothing and the softness of the earth. 
There. A flash of yellow in your blurred vision, aided by another strike of lightning atop Aluralura Mountain. You picked up the worn, dirty radio in your heavy hand, pressing at its side. 
“Hello? Seungcheol?” 
There was no static to indicate your message had been relayed, and the usual red digital numbers telling you what channel you were on was gone, a simple, black screen remaining, mirroring your muddied face, twisted in anguish. 
“Fuck this,” you hissed, standing up on two legs. You looked back up to where your lookout tower was still ablaze, a yellow box in the heights. The rope was fucked. You had to go down anyway. Huffing, you started walking. 
You marched through the undergrowth, crossing through unpathed forest to reach the destination. It was near a hollow marked on your map, and so the expedition, although scarier, more empty and dark without Seungcheol's warm voice, was mild. 
Wet petals brushed your face from rows of bushes, and even through your gloves the cold left your fingertips numb. You sniffled in the dark. 
You found the hollow, then you found the tree. There was, indeed, ash going up the side of it, seemingly stemming from a smaller bush in the clearing, but the fire had been long put out by the insistent rain, and partially you felt disappointment that you’d trekked all the way out here, only for there to be no real danger. 
Heavier than ever, you turned your gaze to the glowing hut in the distance. 
You almost wanted to go back to your own hut, to turn your back to Seungcheol’s glowing tower and forget this ever happened. The anticipation of seeing him - of him seeing you - was a tall wall to overcome. But, you realized, not only was his tower closer; you also needed help. 
Your radio was fucked, your rope was fucked and moreover, you needed to be sure you hadn’t done irreparable damage to your back. With water dripping over the ledge of your hood, you began walking towards Seungcheol. 
Rainwater cascaded off the edge of the trees and the consistent dashed dots looked like tiny glass orbs in the light of Bay Valley Tower. It was intensely quiet for a while - it seemed like every bush-tailed critter of the forest had scuttered away to hide from the rain and the echoing growling of the sky. 
“Y/n!” 
You were so tired you almost could’ve missed it. Each layer of fabric weighed you down and the dirt smearing your cheeks and hands and fabrics could’ve melted you right into the earth. But indeed, a voice - so familiar it almost hurt - was calling to you in the dead of night.
“Seungcheol?” your first call was not a call, but a whisper, as you peered into the thick grooves of the forest. Then, your senses returned to you and you screamed as loud as you could: “Seungcheol!” 
“Y/n!”
You and Seungcheol called for each other, syllables echoing off the huge, towering presence Aluralura Mountain. Getting closer and then closer, and then you could see the figure of another raincoated person, shaded by a hood.
“Y/n? Oh, thank God!” He ran to you, swimming in the rubber of his red coat and pink lips peeking over the closed hood. 
It was a little paralyzing. He was so beautiful, you didn’t even know which speck of his shadowed face to look at. Tan, wet skin and big eyes from which the longest, blackest lashes you’d ever seen sprung. Most notable were his fuzzy, blocky eyebrows sitting over his brown eyes, fine wrinkles springing from the corners (you’d like to think you’d helped create some of those). His lips were big and bright and pouty, but it was wiped away when he smiled at the sight of you, and you could die, because a dimple indented itself in his cheek at the motion. 
“Are you okay?” his smile faded when you said nothing, only stared at him, and then stared at where his thick fingers wrapped around your arm. He leaned into you and God, you hadn’t seen him before this very moment, and now he was leaning over you and he was so close and he smelled like pinewood, and you were pretty sure you smelt exactly the same. 
You lowered yourself from your daze, trying to follow the pattering of rain atop both of your hoods. “Uh,” you gulped, finding his eyes, “yeah, I jus’... I thought you were joking when you said you weren’t white.” 
His laugh. His laugh was even prettier in person and it had the same rasp and the same disapproving hint to it that it had had at all your other jokes. “You’re unbelievable, you know that, Fermata?” 
“Bird watching is crazy, man.” 
He smiled and studied your face for a moment, still leaned over you and thoroughly ignoring the rain and the thunder and the dirt on your boots. Then the smile faded, just a little: “What happened to your radio?” 
“Oh- oh my God! Do you- do you remember my first day? The drop off! I fuckin’- fell down, my rope came undone on the hook! My radio was knocked the fuck out, it was crazy, I’m gonna need a new one-”
“Are you okay? You fell?” Seungcheol’s strong eyebrows became furrowed and the sight was so utterly mesmerizing to you. You waved him off: “I’ll be fine, please, I just want to get out of this weather.” 
Seungcheol did not seem to entirely believe you, but nonetheless he grabbed your hand - in his own rough, used one - and started leading you upwards (“If I don’t hold your hand, how can I be sure you don’t fall down another drop off?”).
Time was not as agonizingly slow by his size, and the tower seemed to propel towards you and the hands on your wristwatch seemed to move backwards. Not before long, you were climbing up the stairway with Seungcheol’s iron fist on your wrist, so as to prevent you from falling down something else (you had a feeling that he would not let this go). 
“I’m gonna make us some tea,” grumbled Seungcheol when you arrived.
“Yes, please,” you murmured. Your coat was folded beside you, starry raindrops soaking into a blanket thrown over his bed. 
It was warm in Seungcheol’s tower house - he had half a brain to put an electric heater in the corner of the room, unlike you - and it was only the sudden embrace of warmth that had you looking out into the park and realizing you would have frozen to death if you’d stayed. 
There was a warm glow from a naked bulb in the ceiling (you guessed Seungcheol had put it up himself), an old rug full of sand-corns, and a shelf with various books. Seungcheol also had a small kitchen, a desk and a bed, just like you. The layout was exactly the same, but sitting down on Seungcheol’s bed, you noted he must’ve made some alterations. Your fingers pulled at the white of the mattress - it was his own and it was much softer.  
When the electric kettle (a rusted, iron old thing) was cooking, Seungcheol turned to you sheepishly and unzipped his coat. You waited in secret anticipation for his supposedly smoking-hot bod, but were disappointed to see another sweater underneath it. 
Seungcheol stopped the kettle and took two large mugs from his cupboard. These, he placed on a carved tray (you thought he might have made it himself from pinewood), and then from a small, wooden tea box on his countertop, he produced two bright yellow tea packets, which he gently placed in the mugs. Then he poured in the water, steam traveling up to open his pores and whatnot. 
“Do you want anything in yours?” he asked, not really looking. 
“Uhm. No, no, thank you,” your hands were folded in your lap. 
He only grunted in response and left one tea untouched, then took a clear, plastic container of honey from an array of unrefrigerated condiments, and squirted half the bottle into his tea. He sniffled when he was done, grabbing the tray and turning to you. Tonight, Seungcheol was uncharacteristically nervous.
“Can you-?”
“Hm?”
“That little- little table over there-”
“What?”
“Can you grab it?- For- for the tray?” 
“Oh, yeah, sure.” 
The tea sat on the tray and the tray sat on the foldable table and you and Seungcheol sat before them on the edge of his bed. You took the hefty mug in your hand and took a slurp, looking over at him from the rim. Seungcheol looked at you awkwardly. He did not move for his tea. 
“I should take a look at your back,” he said. 
“What? Why?” you quacked disapprovingly. “You fell on it,” Seungcheol reminded you.
You shook your head silently. “I like your hut. It’s way better than mine.” 
“I’ve been here longer,” Seungcheol shrugged. You looked at him and he seemed displeased - this would not have been a big deal were you speaking to him on the radio, but his aura was much more commanding in person - something about his eyes, you thought. You had to look away, settling on your mug again (there was a cartoon dog on it). 
“I suppose that’s true,” you murmured. Seungcheol stared into the side of your face and his obvious concern for you weighed down at your muscles. 
A gentle pause where rain pattered his roof. 
“Are you okay?” 
You glanced over, nervously: “Tired.” 
He bit his lip: “Maybe I should’ve made coffee... Can we put instant coffee in tea?” 
“Seungcheol, I wanted to ask you something,” you said and put your mug down on the tray again with a small ‘clink’. Seungcheol rubbed his hands over his trouser-clad thighs, nodding, maybe more nervous than you. The warm glow of the bulb made him even prettier and all was warm and dry in the hut, even though rain was falling down in thick curtains just outside by the troughs. “It’s just..” you began, “you’ve been so avoidant about this.. Jun guy..”
Seungcheol’s sigh interrupted you before you could finish: “He was just the guy that worked here before you.” 
“I found another letter.”
Seungcheol’s furrowed expression softened and he looked at you with big, glassy brown eyes, hidden under a waft of choppy bangs. What was that in the shine of his pupil? Fear? Vulnerability? Sadness?
“It was about- it said he was gonna go be with his mother and that- that he would miss you,” you explained and your voice was snotty and throaty, and your eyes averted to a folded napkin beside a half-eaten slice of bread. A fly circulated it hungrily. 
Seungcheol’s lips made a tight line, dimples poking out pathetically. He cleared his throat and you heard the strain in his vocal chords once more (and it was so real because there he was - right beside you). 
“Me and Junhui came here together. We’d just finished college and we didn’t want-.. We didn’t want to be adults yet. Like, an office job, wife and kids,” he began and there was a tremor about Seungcheol tonight. “I don’t think he was made for a job like this though. I think the loneliness got to him.. Think he just lived with it ‘cause he could tell I liked it.” 
You nodded along until he wasn’t speaking anymore. Then a thick silence absorbed the two of you, a patch of moss drowned in the downpour. 
“His mom was dead, so..” he whispered. Tears gathered at his waterline like a string of stars. “So, yeah, he went to.. To be with her.” 
“I’m so sorry, Seungcheol,” you whispered and the echoing whispers of the storm bouncing off the rock faces of Aluralura mountain beckoned your hand onto his woolen sleeve. “I had no idea.” 
“They never found his body, you know? He’s just out there, somewhere,” both you and Seungcheol turned your heads out to the pitch black expanse of the massive park. Your mind wandered to every crook and crevice you’d seen out there, wondering if a dead body had hidden behind a quarry rock. “Fuckin’ terrified I’ll find him one day. Just… Rotten.” 
You didn’t know what to say. What do you say? Even though you’d stood in a similar situation - losing a friend - you couldn’t find anything that could ease his pain, the pain that was now tinting the light blue and dulling the sound of the rain. The whole room was pulsating. Luckily, it seemed Seungcheol had something more to say. You watched his lips pucker as the words tried to leave his tongue, then watched them draw back. 
“He used to.. He used to say this thing. It reminded me so much of what you- you said that night about, uhm, your friend’s friend. He used to say that- that sometimes he’d wake up in the middle of the night and he’d just be.. Totally.. Convinced that he was at the bottom of Fermata Lake and he was drowning,” Seungcheol’s voice broke one too many times and his jaw clenched. “God, I was so worried. Jus’ thought I couldn’t- I couldn’t be the reason that happened again.” 
“I…” A tear slipped down your face and your hand left Seungcheol’s arm to wipe it, furiously.He turned to you pitifully, the broad width of his shoulders hanging low. “I’m sorry- you weren’t meant to feel that way-”
“It’s okay. I wanted to help,” Seungcheol grabbed your hands in his, a deep frown on his lips. 
You stopped the tears, face burning hot and wet when you looked up at him again, calmed. His thumbs stroked over the backs of your hands. The pads were rough and beaten. 
“Y’know it was sort of the same for me,” you said. Seungcheol waited for you to talk patiently and with a small, encouraging smile, as warmth streamed from his hands into yours.
“Yeah, my- uh roommate - best friend - died. And I couldn’t stop thinking about how I found him, like, his hand was just outstretched towards- towards the wall to my room, and he must’ve just lied there while his heart was giving out and I wasn’t there-... And I found him the next morning like that and I thought he was asleep and I left him there. Again. And I just can’t stop seeing him everywhere and for a while I was afraid that he would move, you know, like, start crawling towards me or some shit, but I think now I’m actually more afraid that he’ll never move. I think that’s the joke or whatever, he just won’t move, he’ll just be there the way I left him- and I guess- I guess, I thought I could find some sort of higher purpose out here, but I just can’t.. I feel more as though.. Like, it was these things that took him away from me, these fundamental parts of- existence. Like all the cliffs have evil faces and they want to take me too, and maybe I did want them to take me, but not- not anymore. I don’t know if that makes any sense?” 
You peered up at Seungcheol through your lashes, wet and heavy. He was frowning, hands gripping yours tighter.
“You don’t want them to take you anymore?” he asked quietly. You shook your head. “How so?”
“Honestly, I don’t think it has much to do with me or the park. I think-” you gaze flitted to Seungcheol and he smiled knowingly. You scoffed and smiled too. 
Although you both were fully clothed (Seungcheol annoyingly so), it felt as if all the layers had been stripped away one by one; sweaters and trousers, skin and meat and bones. All there was left were two brightly glowing hearts in front of one another. 
“It’s okay,” he whispered then. “You don’t have to say it.”
You rolled your eyes: “I think it’s because of you.” 
He grinned, wrinkles crinkling the corners of his eyes and cheeks bunching up in shiny, red fat. You poorly suppressed your own grin and the two of you leaned into each other when your eyes hooked, laughing into each other's shoulders.
“You’re so dumb,” you complained, forehead scratching against the stiff, knitted threads in Seungcheol’s shirt. 
“I think- I think we both jus’ get dumber together,” you could feel his smile into your neck and the hot stream of air that bounced against the skin. 
Right as you were about to pull away, Seungcheol’s arms wrapped around your back and pushed you back into him. You giggled at the motion, but with little thought your own arms wrapped around his back too, and your knees clashed where they met. 
“Seungcheol?” your voice was muffled by his neck. His only response was hum, that ruminated from deep in his throat right by your ear. You pulled away until you were staring at his face. 
Each thick stroke of eyebrow hair, each long, black eyelash and each mole dotted on his softly aging skin was crystal clear then. Your hands wrapped around his biceps and felt your heart buzz at their pronounced carvings under the wool. Seungcheol smiled down at you in a sort of adoring way.
“I think-” you began, then felt stupid, then felt idiotic and cowardly. “I don’t know- I think we should kiss now?” 
It came out as more of a question than a statement. 
Seungcheol gravelled a laugh and his eyes became all squinty and he pursed his lips as if it concealed his amusement in any way at how you squirmed beneath him and your face heated up. 
“I think you’re right,” he nodded and you could barely register the feeling of joy that exploded in your chest, before Seungcheol’s pillowy lips crashed into yours at the same instance as a crack of thunder. 
The lightning was a flickering show to the performance of yours and Seungcheol’s passionate kiss. His lips molded to yours and yours to his, warm and chapped and your hands couldn’t help but wrap around the soft planes of his cheeks - to pull him further, to keep him with you. 
Seungcheol grappled for your hips, and you moaned in a sort of discombobulated agreement, as he, with shocking ease, pulled you into his lap. His hands on your body, stroking and pressing into the meat, left a burning ghostly trail behind it. 
“Can I be honest?” you mumbled in between bitten kisses and panted breaths. “You’re hotter than I imagined.” 
Seungcheol smiled into the kiss at that: “You too, baby. Now you get the real thing, hm? After fucking your sweet pussy thinking about me?” 
You whined in response, hips canting down into his and head dropping into the warm crook of his neck. You licked mindlessly at the skin, rolling your hips into his. Seungcheol groaned and steel hands halted your eager core. 
“Desperate so quick?” he quirked, and you cried out because how could even begin to describe how hot it was that he could entirely still your movements so nonchalantly? You swallowed before you tilted your head from the safety of his neck. 
“I have waited so fucking long for your cock, Cheol. I need it inside me now,” you said seriously, and it was his turn to swallow the rising viscous in his throat, before he nodded and pushed you off his lap to remove his trousers. 
You saw the way the metal of the belt reflected the light, as he (almost angrily) began journeying it off his middle, and you took the hint, beginning to discard your clothes. Your first sweater fell to the floor, then the next followed, and then you were stomping the floor to rid your soaked trousers. Another article of clothing that was soaked - your panties! And embarrassingly so, you thought, watching the slick, wet patch as you lowered the material to the floor. 
Only then did your attention return to Seungcheol, now fully naked in his hut with windows on all sides, and you audibly gasped. 
His torso was one huge slab of muscle and meat. The skin was relatively pale, pronounced pecs and his arms were like tree trunks at his sides. His thighs were fucking huge, indentations of muscles peering through his skin, as he impatiently worked his boxers off. 
He halted though at your gasp, smirking cockily before returning to his work.
“Is it as good as you imagined when you came thinkin’ ‘bout me?” he muttered as his boxers slid down his calf. Too busy staring at his girthy, leaking cock sprouting between his legs, you neglected to answer and Seungcheol continued in a deliberately raspy tone: “Jus’ thinking about your pretty moans, my cock’s aching for you, princess. You’re not gonna come warm it up, beautiful?” 
“Yes-” you stumbled over a treacherous boot, “yes, I am!” 
“Good girl,” Seungcheol rumbled, bemused, as your knees floundered into the mattress and back into his lap. Seungcheol seemed to have other plans, however, because as soon as you had found your footing, and his warm hands were sliding up your back and his neck was craned up to you, breath hitting your breasts, he raised you and flipped you over, so you were digging into the mattress and he was above you. The shadows only served to define the chisel of his arms further. 
His hand slid down your soft thighs, settling in between your legs to run two fingers through your folds. 
“Your pussy is so pretty,” he whispered, somewhat mesmerized at the slick coating his fingertips. You squirmed impatiently and he shushed you, ever so gently: “Shh, baby, I’ll take care of you.” 
Immediately following up on his promise, the two fingers snaked down to your sensitive, pulsing hole, prodding gently. You wiggled and whined, one of your hands (which had been gripping his bedsheets) stopped him at the wrist. He stopped, eyes flitting up to your flushed, shiny face questioningly. 
“I wan’ your cock now. No prep,” you scowled, strands of hair sticking out messily. Seungcheol frowned. 
“I need to-” 
“I’m wet enough, please, been thinkin’ ‘bout this since-..” you cut yourself off with a frustrated sigh, eyebrows knitted together in frustration. Seungcheol couldn’t help but smile at how fucked out you were already, so precious, all beautiful and naked and womanly. 
“You sure?” he asked, voice matching the depth of the thunder. You nodded eagerly: “Please, please-” 
“Okay,” he murmured, sticky hand leaving your burning pussy in favor of pressing it against the underside of your thigh. At the command of his strong hands, your body folded in half and the realization of your position had you crying out pathetically. “Anything for my beautiful baby.” 
My. His. The word choice had you clenching around nothing, all spread out for him while he lined his pretty, red cock up with your entrance. 
“Gonna feel real full in a minute, yeah?” he said absently, watching intently at how your pretty pussy was splayed out and ready and aching for him, mind reeling at the sight of you and the smell of you and how you felt under his hands. 
And suddenly it was there - a mountain of pressure building around the head of his cock as it pushed inside, bursting when he pushed in a little further, until he was fully nestled inside. Seungcheol was not unaffected, body curling over yours animalistically with a deep, throaty groan. You, too, had to squirm and moan wantonly, as your body shone under the bulb. 
“You’re so tight, pretty,” Seungcheol managed, face scrunched up, as his pelvis met your pubic bone. His hands gripped your shaking legs once more, fully folding you in half and you cried as the movement invited him further inside, feeling him brush the spongy spot inside you. 
“Feel s’good!” you moaned, even as he hadn’t moved yet, and Seungcheol’s hands squeezed you in response. 
Experimentally (perhaps fearful, as you had rushed into it without preparation), Seungcheol thrust shallowly and was pleased at your broken cry, so he did it again and then again, and then he was building up a rhythm and your sultry moans were slipping through the cracks of the hut and bouncing off the walls of Aluralura mountain and echoing twenty times over. 
There was nothing sweet about the pace of Seungcheol’s hips. He was pistoning in and out with an impressive agility, huffing over your folded body. It was desperation; the way your nails raked over his back and his sloping arms, and sweet, little whimpers and your pussy choking his cock. 
“Sweetest, prettiest-” he squeezed his eyes shut and groaned, stomach caving inwards and clenching. “Fuck, cutest, little princess being stuffed full of my cock.”
“Love your cock,” you babbled, “Love- love your cock, love you.” 
The words slipped out as if they were nothing, but their meaning was solidified by your raking hand sneaking up to his neck and pulling him down into another sloppy kiss. Tongues melding and spit trickling down your chin as he hummed into your mouth in the most wonderful way. 
“Love you, too. Pretty, funny, sweet girl-” 
“A-ah, ‘m gonna cum soon,” you warned, voice nothing but a breath, and your face pleasured, scrunched up in the dead of night. Your stomach was a well of pressure.
“I know, baby, I know. Squeezing me so tight,” he soothed, hands running up and down the plush underside of your thighs, as his hips continued their unrelenting pace. “Come on, cum on my cock.” 
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, Seungcheol-” a string of curses and his name followed as your pussy clenched one last hard time and your cum seeped out around his thick, veiny length.
Holding his own orgasm at bay, he clenched his jaw and gritted out: “Where d’you want my cum?” 
“Inside!” you mewled, overstimulated and sore, and legs still pressed to your chest, clammy and slick. 
Seungcheol would’ve made a snarky remark was he not already cumming at your words, white seed painting your insides and spilling out around his softening length. He thrust a couple more times, relishing in the sounds of your fucked-out moans before he’d emptied himself, and he dropped down beside you. 
Due to the nature of a one-person bed, you and Seungcheol were both pressed close to one another, covered in sweat. Your panting, huffing breaths synchronized and you stared into each other's eyes, all wild and blushed. 
“Holy shit,” you whispered, brought back to reality by a distant calling owl. You were still in the park, you realized - not some other pleasure dimension like one may have thought. Seungcheol smiled giddily.
You looked out into the wasteland, and your eyelids and limbs (draping over Seungcheol’s big, pretty body) were suddenly heavy. You yawned.
“D’you think we have to stay up anymore?”
Seungcheol watched you gauging the pinelands with starry eyes. “You can go to bed,” he offered gently, “I’ll stay up and make sure the storm’s over.” 
“Are you sure?” you mumbled, but you were already settling into the domes of his chest, closing your eyes. Seungcheol looked at you and thought you were adorable. 
“Yeah.” 
“Can you stay here?” 
“Yeah.” 
“Can your dick stay inside me?” 
This prompted a laughter blooming all the way from his chest, where your cheek bunched up against the skin. His arm was wrapped around your back. 
“Sure, baby.” 
You mumbled something like ‘okay’ or ‘good’ or ‘thank you’, and you drifted off into sleep with his arms around you, and when Seungcheol was certain the storm had passed, he nuzzled his head into your hair and dozed off himself. 
At the swimming red sky of dawn, your eyes pried open to see Seungcheol already awake, still wrapped around you. 
Nonchalantly (that is to say: as if your chest was not bursting with glee), you nodded your head over to the window behind him:
“Is that not a black-billed cuckoo?!” 
And Seungcheol thought that maybe you and him could find birds together elsewhere too. 
955 notes · View notes
bbgghost · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
lot to love: chapter 7
blurb: you are the nineteen year old, younger, mutant sister of Mystique. you go to Professor X's school and have been since you were young. slow burn with wolverine ♡♡♡
a.n. im worried these are too short but idk erm enjoy this my little sweatys SEND IN YOUR REQUESTS PLEASE i would love to write specifically for you guysss ♡
c.w. age gap is mentioned alot lols! thinks get a little heated, gulp.
masterlist | tags: @white-wolf-buckaroo @mikariell95 @onlythehobi @kokomixxk @samsamsantos @fluffyflamingo20
Tumblr media
The term had ended, and the summer holidays had finally started. Most of the students went home to their families, but some remained, as they had no other place to go. You sat in the library with many of these students, creating a proper class plan for the new school year. Storm had helped you by giving you some of her early plans and Scott offered to sit by during your first lesson. It was comforting to have them support you, as you had oftened looked to them when you were younger.
You reflect on those days, back when you really struggled getting over your abandonment and you struggled making any friends. You remember spending many days alone on the grounds, in hallways, in the lunch hall, at the kitchen bench. You realised how grateful you were for Storm, and remember how she began sitting with you, before you met Bobby and Pyro. You hoped you could possibly do that for one of your students, not that you wanted them to have horrible pasts and struggle to make friends. You wanted that motherly relationship that you had only ever had with Storm, well one you still have.
The sun sets slowly over time, and the warm beam of sunlight that had illuminated your desk early this afternoon begins to fade. You notice yourself feeling cooler, the sky getting darker and the lack of students now surrounding you. Most likely they had gone to participate in their hobbies, a routine you had also developed in your early years. You pack up your belongings and made your way outside.
When you exit the library, you're met with a nice feeling of calm. Nobody was running through the hallway, bumping into you and there weren't any young kids screaming. You gratefully took in a deep breath, and made your way towards the teachers lounge.
Once in their, you sat down next to Scott, who was deep into some old classic book. You relaxed into the old leather of the chair and turned to him. "You enjoying your new privledges?" He asked. You hummed in response. "Well, term hasn't started so you aren't exactly a teacher yet, are you?" He joked. "I guess not." You considered, "But I'm definetly working hard like one." He laughed at that.
"Have you seen Logan?" You asked. He looked up in thought. "I think he just got back from taking Rogue and Bobby somewhere." He said. You smiled at the thought of him driving your friends around. You remember that they aren't old enough to drive yet and smile in amusement. "Thanks." You said before going towards the door. You took a shortcut out of the building and back into the garage where you found the Wolverine himself.
He had his back to you, he was clad in a classic wife-beater and blue jeans. You bit your lip as you eyed him. He was kneeling down next to his bike, tightening something with a wrench. Did the school even own hardware tools like wrenches? Sweat gleamed down his back, and illuminated his tan muscles. "You going to keep staring, or are you gonna start talking?" He asked. Your eyes widened and you swallowed harshly, and remembered that he could probably sense you. "What do you want me to do?" You asked seductively. He turned to you with his brow raised and laughed with a very small smile.
"I don't think you want to know." He smirked. You made your way closer too him as he turned and stood up. You look up at him, flashing him your best doe eyes and whispering, "Yeah, I do." He smirked and clutched the wrench in his hand so tight his knuckles turned white. You briefly imagined his claws coming out of the skin, but came back to reality when he started laughing. "You're very confident, missy." He commented and turned back around to his bike.
"I'm just matching you." You stated plainly as you watched him twist something different. "And you're sassy." He added. You rolled your eyes with a huff. You came even closer to him and grabbed at his wrist, wanting his attention. He dropped his other hand that was working on the bike and turned around to you. "Don't be doing that." He said quietly. "Doing what?" You asked innocently like. He gritted his teeth together and looked over your head. "Stop avoiding it." You whispered quietly, he picked it up, despite you almost going silent at the end.
"You need to be with boys your age." He said even softer this time. He didn't want to fully acknowledge that there was something going on between you too. He didn't even want to begin going into what he wanted to say. You moved your hand down his wrist, and began rubbing your thumb over the back of his hand. "No. I don't." You said firmly. He clenched his jaw and finally looked back down at you. "Yes. You do." He said almost angrily. "I'm old enough." You pleaded. "I'm twenty in two weeks."
"Jesus Christ, I'm 160 years older than you." He exclaimed. "I don't care!" You cried and grasped his other hand, him having put down the tool a while ago. He didn't respond and looked away from you. Tears brewed in your eyes at the sting of rejection. You thought about slapping him and punching him. You thought about breaking down in his arms. Instead he merely pulled his hands from your grasp. In a last attempt at crying out to him you shouted. "Oh, fuck you!" You said and turned to walk out.
"Hey! Don't you talk to me like that!" He fumed. You span back around and looked at him in shock. You repeated again, "Fuck you." only louder and with more attitude. He took one last calm breath before walking towards you. You feared for you life, only for a brief moment, but remembered that you knew he would never even think about hurting you. He grabbed your biceps between his large forceful hands. "Don't be such a brat." He spat. You glared at him, staring into his dark brown eyes.
His crows feet were so prominent now, and his teeth bared in anger. He looked down at you, and noticed how soft you looked between his two hands, all young and beautiful. His right hand quickly made its way into the back of your head, grabbing at a fistful of your hair. Your head leaned back at the movement. Your angry stare sooned turned expecting, waiting for his next move.
After many movements he pushed his lips onto yours, and moved them over your soft and plush ones. You felt the inside of his mouth, and felt your teeth clash. It was messy, rushed, passionate and horny. You gripped both your hands onto his biceps to stable you as he arched your back against him. His left hand moved down to your ass, and he squeezed feverishly. You squeaked into his mouth at the harsh grip and melted into his hold.
You pulled away from him after a bit, panting as you realised how desperate for air you were. "Sorry." You squeaked out. He released his hold on your cheek and instead took to rubbing his hands up and down your sides. "Never apologise doll. I swear." He spits out inbetween heavy breaths. "You're so beautiful." He says, eyes trained on yours. "Thanks." You whispered quietly, and he smiled at your response. He wrapped his arms around your neck and pulled you close to him. "I'm sorry." He said and kissed the top of your head. You put your hands around his back, touching the textured fabric of his tank.
As he pulled back, you drew you hands to his front and rubbed your hands over his chest. "It's okay." You whispered while nodding. He nodded along with you before looking away. "Can we go inside?" You asked. He hummed in agreement and put his arm around your shoulder, leading you through the garage door.
Tumblr media
Later that night, you sat on the couch with him in the front of the tv. His right arm was draped over your shoulder, and you were curled into his side. You don't think there was anywhere else you would rather be. You wished you could stay there forever. His fingers drew on your bicep in soft circles, and the calming nature of the movement made your eyes droop. Some old movie from the 70's that Logan said he had watched at least three times played on the tv. You didn't completely understand the plot of it. A mix of being distracted and being tired influenced your ability to do so. You nuzzled your head into Logan's side and finally shut your eyes.
At the sound of your calm breaths turning even deeper he looked down at you to find you deep asleep. Your soft lips were pouted and parted. Your dark, soft lashes rested against your warm cheeks and fluttered slightly when the telivision got a little loud. Logan swore he had never seen anything more peaceful. It made his heart warm and completely god rid of his thoughts.
He gently turned to put his right arm under your torso and his left arm under your legs, picking you up and holding you carefully. You adjusted yourself, slowly waking from your deep sleep, and put your arms around his neck to stabilise yourself. He took slow steps out of the living room and into the foyer before ascending the stairs. He took you to his room, not yours, and whispered to you to 'hold on tight' while he opened the door. You mumbled softly in his ear, it all being incoherent, as he closed the door behind you.
He laid you down on his bed, and turned to undress himself. He stripped down to his boxers, and walked into his small ensuite. Unbeknowst to him, you watched him the entire time, eyes trained on his back and slowly his backside. You sleepily eyed him, like a starved woman and sighed when he walked away. You turned over, now more awake, and began undressing yourself. You pulled off your jeans and pulled off your top. You kept your bra on and laid back down in the sheets.
When Logan came back out he saw your eyes peaking out from the covers. He smiled tiredly and climbed in next to you. He wrapped his arms around your body as you curled into him. He brushed your hair back from your neck and looked between your eyes.
"You're such a sweet thing." He whispered.
100 notes · View notes
factual-fantasy · 22 days
Text
23 asks! Thank you!! :}} 🐶
Tumblr media
Guys, please read the FAQ in my pinned posed before sending asks, like the ask button says. You don't have to read them all- just a quick check to see if i have answered your question already and especially to see my stance on requests.
I'm not taking drawing requests at the moment. If I hit an art block and start taking requests, I'll make a post about it and update my pinned post.
Again, please just take a quick glance at the FAQ before sending in your asks. It saves both of us a lot of time. Thank you! <:)
Tumblr media
Currently there isn't actually a plot line I'm following- its more of a "day in the life of the neighborhood" kind'a thing.
The main points of interest though is Wally's home being alive and it watches him sleep at night.. this causes Wally to have terrible sleeping problems and anxiety. But no one knows Home is the culprit..
Another point of interest is Julie secretly actually being a huge beast that is simply disguising herself as this pretty little harmless neighbor.. she truly is a nice person and loves her friends, but she has disguised herself to look this way so that people wouldn't be afraid of her. Only Frank knows what she really looks like..
And lastly, Eddie is a real human from our/another world. He was somehow brought here to the neighborhood.. he has no memory of his original life..
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Oh wow!! :000 That blue one is so pretty.... 🥺💞💞
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
@imdonewiththisblogsblog
A BUTTERFLY WITH CLEAR WINGS?? THAT SOO PRETYYYY💞💞💞
Tumblr media Tumblr media
@littlelightfish
AAA THANYIOU!! :DDDD
Octo is intended to kind'a have normal old man problems- he's kind'a far sighted, has a cranky back, gets tired easy, gets winded faster than he used to.. other than that and the natural aches and sores that came after his major injury- (that comic you're referencing) he's relatively ok! :00 (Those dizzy spells that I talked about come from when he overworks himself.. normal old man things! <:D)
Seafoam is intended to be the youngest of his siblings, and his eldest sister was a rotten egg that had kids way too young.. and her kids were ALSO rotten eggs that had THEIR kids way too young. One of those kids being Red. So because of the age gap between him and his sister, and both generations having kids at like 20 years old... Seafoam is 55-65 and Red, his great nephew, is like 4-6...
Spider crab tends to not interact a whole lot with Pinwheel and Tuna, since they are a little too high energy and loud for him. 😅 But Coco and Red are nice company. :)
Spider does worry about the crewmembers that are missing limbs or eyes.. he does his best to offer help without overstepping. Sometimes those things are sensitive to talk about.. Also Spider sure looks old, but I pictured him being somewhere in his late 30s. Stress will add a lot of age to your face... 😅
I can see Spider crab, Louis and Tuna spending the most time in the kitchen just to be around Ellie. Although if one of them comes for a visit and one of the other 2 is already there, they probably wont stick around long. <XD Spider doesn't like Louis or Tuna's noise and Tuna like's to be alone with Ellie to talk peacefully.. As to who cooks when she cant... I can see the crew eating things that don't need to be cooked until she gets better. Pre-baked bread, easy sandwiches, etc- in an emergency though I can see the crew catching fish and Louis cooking them for the crew :))
Red might have nightmares yeah.. although his family were pretty rotten so this new crew is actually rather nice.. also Coco is his favorite playmate :))
AAA THANKYIUU!! :DDD IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE URCHINS DESIGN!! :)))) Unfortunately though, I haven't thought out her backstory too much..
I'm thinking she met Cuttlefish the same time the rest of the crew did. As for what made them friends, I kind'a like the idea that Urchin can see right through Cuttle's facade. She's not used to having someone see through all her lies, see the REAL her.. and still want to be her friend. Its nice.. 🥺
and finally WAARRHGHH THANKD FOR THIS ASK! :DDD MY HEART IS FULL OF JOY READING YOUR INTEREST IN KY OCS!!! :))))
Tumblr media
Honestly? I have absolutely no idea XD 💀💀 All I know is Poppy is the oldest and Sally is the youngest. Sally is probably around 18-20--
Tumblr media
@spirited-splashes
WWAHGGG THABK YOU SO MUCH!! :DD ITS MY FAVORITE THING TO DRAW!! :}}}}}
Tumblr media
@legitanawkwardmess
ALKDKJENFKJEN THATS HILARIOUS XDDDD
Tumblr media
I haven't decided what the neighbors reactions would be since I have no plans for Julie to reveal herself.. though even if she did, I have a feeling she would want to maintain her smaller form. Even if it takes more energy..
To Julie, this body represents who she really is. Who she really wants to be. This is how she want's the world to see her. Even if the truth got out and everyone accepted her. She'd stay in her smaller form anyways..
Tumblr media Tumblr media
@i-only-created-this-to-read
So far I don't have intentions for there to have been any tenants before Wally.. or at least no one will ever find out who they were or what happened to them.
As for how old Home is, I haven't decided this and its also a complete mystery to the neighbors. Poppy has lived there ever since she was a child and Home was already there when she moved in..
Now Home could get creative and find different ways to harm or even kill those it doesn't like.. but thankfully Home doesn't have any intentions to hurt anyone, especially not Wally. Home wouldn't even try to significantly hurt Barnaby, despite him getting in the way of Homes plans.. although Home cant resist the occasional stubbed toe or splinter out of frustration...
As for adding stuff to Home's body.. if Wally purposefully slapped a strip of duct tape on the wall, that wouldn't really become a part of Homes body. Things only really attach to Home if they are significant.
Examples being a new shelf. An added wall to split a room, cutting a hole in the wall and installing a window, ripping up carpet and installing hardwood floors, etc. The nail holding up a picture frame or that nail gun plugged into the wall are not apart of Home..
Though that's not to say Home cant control the outlets, it can! But that would only give Home the power to turn the nail gun on and off. Home cant make the gun fire..
As for plants, even if they engulf Home and grow in-between the floorboards, Home cannot control plants.. or if there was moss or some kind of fungus growing on the walls? If it ate away at the wood that plank would just die off and Home couldn't feel/control it anymore..
Lastly, Home being able to move things quickly is kind'a what you would imagine. Home moves them as fast as that object can reasonably move. How fast do you think you could slam a door? How fast do you think the window would slam down shut if you gave it all your might?
I hope I cleared up these questions! :00 And sorry if I accidentally missed one or two! <:D
Tumblr media
OUUGHH I LOVE THIS!! ITS MAKING ME WANT TO DRAW THE COMIC AGAIN XDDDD
Tumblr media
No worries! :DD
Tumblr media
@soulful-rodent
On desktop the limit appears to be 100, I'll see what I can do! 😅Also thank you! :))
Tumblr media
AW! :DDD I'm glad they like it! But yeah absolutely keep it to the light stuff-- my Octonauts art has a surprising amount of blood in it for a kids show 💀
Tumblr media
(Referencing this post)
I might just be! XD🪄✨✨✨Also thank you!! :)))
Tumblr media
@captain-skyler1987
Oof... welcome back? <:D ... sorry-
Tumblr media
Awe! I'm glad to hear you liked my Gravity Falls stuff!! :DDD Thank you so much!! :))
Tumblr media
@jayemover-16
Oh no no! :0 reblogging is a feature of Tumblr and is not reposting! :))
Tumblr media
My idea is that Wally only really has sleepovers with Barnaby. He would have sleep overs with Howdy too, but that Pillar's on a pretty tight sleeping schedule/routine <XD
Now Barnaby has noticed that Wally sleeps better when he crashes at his place. Because of this he has started offering his house as a getaway for Wally when ever he notices he seems a little extra tired..
Something to note; neither Barnaby nor Wally think something is wrong with Wally's house because of this- they're just starting to think that Wally's anxiety is worse when he's alone..
Also thank you so much!! :DDDD
Tumblr media
@wolfie-777
I don't think much would change to be honest.. they'd still be the same old Wally and Barnaby even after a species swap!
Tumblr media
This was sent right after I commented that I'm still open to Welcome Home suggestions. Are these Welcome Home AUs..? <:0 I am unfamiliar with them..
Tumblr media
Oof, went back and fixed it. I tend to type too fast and get slime and smile mixed up. 😅
Tumblr media
It can be a little embarrassing when people point out my typos, mostly because every single typo I make is pointed out every single time without fail.😅💀 But no worries, I know you meant no harm-
60 notes · View notes
akunya · 2 years
Note
eiiiiii the idea of getting private meeting with camboy vox HELLO. you make me suffer for good stuffs every single day 😭💦 can you spoil me a little bittttt. - 🐱
Tumblr media
“private session.”
pairings: camboy!vox akuma x male!reader
summary: congrats, lucky winner! because of your generous donations, vox reached out wanting to thank you in person. things, however, take a turn.
tw: DRUGGING, yandere, manipulation, voice fetish. camshows, drinking, implied noncon. age gap, etc.
notes: last fic of 2022! im posting this mere minutes from midnight, so please pardon any mistakes. ill go back and edit this a bit later.
and yes, i can write a part 2 if you truly wish. sorry for cucking you guys, again..
happy new year everyone, thank you for such an amazing 2022. i hope to write much more in the future!
Tumblr media
“im at the right place, aren’t i..?” you mumbled to yourself, frigid, clammy hands swiping your phone to make sure the location was right. the restaurant looked a bit trendy and sophisticated, somewhere you wouldn't dare step inside on your own. you and vox both agreed on a restaurant to meet at around eight o'clock. to be truly honest with yourself, you never thought you’d have the guts to do something like this — but when vox, the streamer who you’ve been watching for months daily and donating to everyday reached out to you personally, how could you say no?
nonetheless, sitting across from him at the table really made you wish you had refused.
for one, he was much too ethereal to be in your lowly presence. the camera didn’t do him justice at all — his pale skin was a nice contrast to his black hair, adorned by his signature red highlights. he even wore the red eye makeup that you loved to look at, except now, you could see his mouth and bottom half of his face, uncovered by the black mask he would usually wear. his lips looked so soft, and when his tongue darted out to lick them you were nearly going to faint. we’re those.. fangs? his canines were sharp, and you felt like a pervert for staring so intensely.
you quickly paid your respects to the other fans who would never know that vox, a niche but popular adult streamer, was a truly beautiful man in person.
you didn't even notice how silent it had gotten between the two of you. “no need to be so quiet. i don’t bite, i promise.” vox’s sweet voice snapped you out of your thoughts, apologizing profusely for zoning out so much. “you’re right! im sorry, ive just never done anything like this before..” you chuckled awkwardly, shifting in your chair while vox just smiled. he found your skittishness adorable. you reminded him of a scared little bunny — and he was the big bad wolf, ready to eat you up whole.
"what a shame. and here i was thinking you do this quite often, with how you accepted my request and all." the demon smirked at how your face flushed, becoming a stuttering mess. you should've expected it, but he was just as snarky in person as he was on his live shows. as your little meeting continued, vox realized he enjoyed your presence much more than he thought. the night was filled with friendly but interesting conversation, and for once, the demon didn’t feel forced to keep speaking.
at first, he debated on meeting with you in person. what if the person who donated nearly thousands to him each month turned out to be not as pleasant as he hoped? while the demon wouldn't be surprised, he would be a tad disappointed with all of the free shoutouts he's given to you. still, with you being his top donator for a while now, he felt compelled to show some form of graciousness. a little present, just in time for the holidays.
vox enjoyed streaming more than he thought he would. even though he could use his voice and other demonic powers for much grander, sinister things - for some reason, using them to tease and drain the wallets of his viewers was surprisingly just as satisfying. doing this, he never had to worry about getting a silly job like most humans did, letting the demon truly relax when he wasnt tampering with cameras and himself.
but, you, however - vox liked how shy and nervous you were. it awakened a sick monster inside of him, that wanted to see you cry and beg for mercy at his fingertips. he thought his days of toying with mortals was over, but unfortunately (or fortunately?) for you, you seemed to rekindle that fire in his heart. if he didn't know any better, he would've never expected you to be someone that watches adult streams online, let alone spend money on them.
taking advantage of how anxious you were, vox continued to ask questions about yourself, forcing you to blurt out answers in hopes of not screwing up. "so, what do you like about my streams, y/n?" the male swiveled the wine in his glass nonchalantly, golden eyes looking into yours, awaiting an answer. you gulped, shakily drinking yours as well.
"um, well, you're the first streamer i've ever really watched for.. that sort of stuff. i initially liked how your voice sounded, and wanted to hear more, but i ended up staying for your little stories and when you'd talk about yourself. you just seemed really nice." it was a bit embarrassing when you had said it aloud, but it was the truth. you enjoyed the moments where the demon would just ramble the most. of course, given the content of his streams, most of the things he'd speak about were so dirty it made your ears feel hot - however, there were moments where he'd just talk about his day, and you seemed to enjoy those the most.
it was vox's turn to blush, his grip tightening on the wine glass ever so slightly. how could a mere mortal make him feel so... flustered? hes had his fair share of affairs over many decades, however, never has he felt so vulnerable. the demon was expecting you to talk about his cock or something, but of course your innocent little head wouldnt do that. you should be thankful vox isn't a cannibalistic demon, or he seriously would've eaten your heart out by now.
therefore, the man didnt feel any remorse when you went to the bathroom and he slipped a drug into your drink while you were away.
it wasnt his fault - how was he supposed to let you go after today? someone as sinless and pure as yourself needed to be his. vox wouldnt be content with letting you go back to being another viewer behind the screen, not after your little meeting. the demon knew truly that you probably wouldn't refuse going home with him, but that also didnt guarantee you'd accept his offer. he considered the drug just a bit of a push in the right direction, if you will.
"sorry for taking so long. there was a line outside, so.." your voice trailed off, going back to your seat as the older man simply chuckled. why did you feel the need to explain yourself? it didn't matter how long you took, even if you tried to run now, vox would surely find you. pouring some more wine for himself, he filled his glass a bit more to match yours. you tried to tell him you weren't too keen or interested in alcohol at the beginning of your little date, but the demon wouldn't take no for an answer. "y/n, lets have a toast, shall we?" his held up his glass expectantly towards you, waiting for you to clink the rim with your own.
you hesitated for a moment. the smell of wine never enticed you, but seeing vox wait earnestly made your heart flutter. one glass shouldn't hurt, right?
you simply nodded, the familiar clank of glass against glass being shared between you two before drinking. you drank a majority of the wine, only leaving a small amount left. "good boy. its good, isnt it?" you nearly sputtered the drink back up from the praise, nodding again and drinking the rest in one gulp. it was much different hearing his words of affirmation in person. it felt addicting, unreal.
"thats it. a toast for the new year, my boy. im excited for the memories we shall make together. aren't you?" oh, did vox mean his streams? of course you looked forward to those, how could you not! he was the highlight of your day, making you smile and laugh. "mhm! im excited. im looking forward to your streams, vox." the demon felt a shiver roll down his spine, suppressing a groan. he could get used to you saying his name. he wanted to hear you say it in other ways, too.
"i hope we can get more.. personal, as well, y/n. it was truly delightful being here with you." the man had such a way with words, making you swoon. was he this nice with everyone? no wonder he had so many followers! while you didnt know the true extent to what he had implied, you agreed, telling him that you were happy you came out today.
of course you were. you were his little rabbit, frail and gullible, unknowing of the big bad wolf sitting across from your very table. he truly wondered just how oblivious you could be, but much to his delight, he'd find out soon enough. your eyes started to feel heavy, zoning out while he talked about random things to keep you occupied.
"goodness, y/n, are you alright? you look a bit pale. here, let me take you back to my place. i don't live far at all." his voice was sickeningly sweet, how could you deny his offer? you nodded drowsily, letting the man hold you to steady your balance.
the cold air of the outdoors didnt phase you, and neither did it bother vox. peering at your sleeping face, he smiled, leaning in to kiss the top of your forehead.
"happy new years, y/n. lets have fun together." vox whispered in your ear, turning the corner towards his apartment.
1K notes · View notes
atelierlili · 5 months
Note
What's your headcanon for Katniss and Peeta's children?
How old was Katniss when give birth to their daughter?
How many years apart between them in age?
Your headcanon for their name?
Who gets the singing and art skill from their parent?
Bonus question : please give recs of your fav everlark post-Mockingjay fanfic.
Thank you :)
@curiousthg
You’ve made a grave mistake because I have so much to say and some art as well(becuase I’m so sane for them I swear)
So I’ve always headcannon that Katniss had her first baby in her late twenties-early thirties. In my head the 5, 10, 15 years go like this. Year 5: Katniss is open to the idea of children now. The games are done, but is Panem really safe yet? Is she ready yet. No, not really. Year 10: okay, Katniss feels safer and braver now. If it happens it happens. They won’t actively try for it and will let nature take its course. Year 15: Toast boy and girl are born within a 5-ish year time span.
Katniss names the girl Marigold for the golden flowers that Peeta planted next Katniss’ Primroses. Marigolds represent warmth, creativity, joy and good luck, but they were also given away during times of grief as a gesture of kindness and solidarity as the flower’s vibrant colours helped ease the pain of grief. Gold is also the colour that represents the bond between the district 12 team that comprised of Peeta, Katniss, Effie, Haymitch, Portia & Cinna. So it’s also carries some sentimental weight as without them and their bonds, this little girl wouldn’t have been born. Of course, Peeta calls the girl Muffin. Because she’s his little muffin. His little cupcake. It’s not until Effie decides that Mary is too bland a nickname for her favorite niece that we get the girl’s most used nickname- Muffy.
Muffy is a bundle of joy to their lives. And Katniss loves being a mother more than she’d thought. Having Muffy made Katniss yearn for the mini Peeta she dreamt of on a beach in the QQ.
Toastboy pops out about three and a half years later. The age gap is so close to be about the same as Katniss and Prim’s that it makes her heart squeeze again. His name is Cress, after Watercress (wait plz don’t leave), the aquatic plant that can be found in bunches at Katniss’ special lake. They are a highly nutritious plant to eat and is said to believe to have medicinal uses like treating swelling and fevers. The name is also a small nod to Annie Cresta and Finnick because of the water connection. His curly blonde hair gets him the nickname Goldilocks from Johanna.
Both children are highly artistic and connected to nature, Katniss teaches them both to hunt, but the kiddos don’t like it as much because they don’t like to hurt animals. It hurts Katniss a little bit, but she’s glad that bloodshed and violence (even to survive) aren’t a daily part of their lives.
Muffy is a performer. She’s definitely daddy’s little girl because she loves to yap. She could yap all day and still find something to talk about. She grows up loving to dance and then wanting to sing and dance- the dreams of making it big in the Capitol as a actress. (To Katniss’ complete and under horror) She’ll definitely develope some complex when it comes to being the Mockingjay’s daughter. Especially when she starts getting movie offers to play her Mom, even when after she tries going out of her way to distance herself from Katniss by going under a different stage name.
Cress is very much not Muffy. He’s a quiet little guy who follows after his big sister like a little duckling. He’s the only one who doesn’t get tired of her yapping and genuinely listens to her. Peeta and Katniss were a little worried when they started noticing that he wasn’t speaking for a while. They go to doctors and they can never find what’s causing this speech delay, but one day he starts talking at the age of 2, and he has the softest most sweetest voice in the world. He’s a very quiet and observant kid, that gets into more trouble than you’d think. While Peeta’s art is very imagery and emotionally (and politically) focused, Cress’s art is not. He’s super talented with a pencil and really skilled at realistic/technical drawings that he’d probably go an illustrate diagrams for scientific textbooks on nature and stuff. Growing up, he probably feels like his art work is too cold and unfeeling compared to Peeta’s splash of life. But in reality, the difference between they art styles are indicative of how they see and filter the world through their art.
Anyway, this is taking waaay to long so here is some early concept art of the toast babies. I’m still messing around with the tones and hues of their design, so none of this is final. I’m probs gonna switch Cress’s skin tone to a more golden undertone as opposed to Katniss’s reddish one to match his hair color, which might get a tad darker (or lighter tbh. In the books Peeta’s an ashy blonde) Meanwhile maybe I’ll give Muffy the redder undertone? There’s something off bout her that I need to keep experimenting with. She screams Movie Katniss baby, not Book Katniss Baby, but maybe that’s only because Jen has blue eyes.
Tumblr media
76 notes · View notes
juniperss · 2 months
Text
Little Sister Curtis Headcanons
these were inspired by this request and co-created with my pal @a-libra-writes!!
Tumblr media
Libra and I came up with the name “Sunshine” because 1) it’s adorable and 2) you can’t tell me that’s not a name that Mom and Papa Curtis wouldn’t have had written down on the baby name list. Her brothers usually call her by her first name, but Sunny also works just fine.
Only about a year gap between Sunny and Ponyboy which places her at around 13 if we’re going based off the book’s events (while ignoring certain plot elements that make me sad, thank you)
Sunny is a bit more like Darry after their parents die; she tries to keep the house clean and take over her mom’s responsibilities. Because if Darry is gonna earn the money, maybe she can help this way. Her brothers worry that she’s growing up too fast and try to get her to take it easy (pots meet kettle!!!). 
Darry tries to take her out to the movies when she gets stressed out even if he falls asleep 10 minutes in. She doesn’t really mind that he dozes off, she’s used to it. It's the thought that counts. 
Soda has her come to work with him sometimes and help out on the cars. “Learn something!” as if she doesn’t learn enough at school. Comes home dirtied and tired of Soda and Steve, complains a bit but she's smiling.
Tags along with Ponyboy to anywhere he wants. They usually go for walks and talk about school and the gang. 
If Johnny is the “pet brother” for the Gang, Sunny is the pet sister and has an interesting relationship with the rest of the boys.
Two Bit is viewed as a “decent” brother figure and he at least knows how to act around a younger sister. Probably the most likely out of the group (next to her actual brothers) to look after Sunny like his own kid sister. There’s no antics you can get up to that surprise him anymore than he’s already used to. 
Steve is a pest to her and gets in the way of spending time with Soda. They have a small rivalry but it’s less tense then Steve and Pony’s relationship for sure. Sunny doesn’t tag along nearly as much so it kinda evens things out. 
Dally and Sunny…..are what I’d describe as a Tom and Jerry dynamic but who's Tom and who's Jerry is always changing. Mutual chaos and the source of that chaos switches depending on the day. Dally is on Sunny’s shit list because he made a comment about her cooking once. Which, to be fair to Dallas, the potatoes in the soup WERE NOT cooked through so he was right, but she still holds a little grudge. It doesn’t matter if he was the only person to actually eat all of it. She scolds Dally for putting his feet on the coffee table, he calls her a brat, she aims the football for the back of his head, he pulls on her hair and purposefully calls her by the wrong name. Laughs like a fiend when she yells “Dallas Winston im gonna knock your head right off!". But she also knows that Dallas would be the first person to knock someone’s teeth out if she needed him to. 
Johnny is her pal and she enjoys his company the most of the Gang. He’s a good escape from the rowdy bunch and he doesn’t cause nearly as much damage in the house as the rest, he helps with the dishes and he laughs at her jokes. She likes him and he likes her and they’ve got each other’s backs.
The Brothers are worried about raising a sister. I mean they know fundamentally that she needs what they do and that for the last 13 years they’ve been doing a good job of looking out for her, but all 3 of them are concerned that they’re not enough for Sunshine. Not only did she lose her parents, she lost her Mom and she doesn’t have anyone who can fill that spot. Mrs. Matthews helps when she can and she’s a lifesaver to Darry when he has questions, but he can’t shake the feeling that Sunshine was robbed of better and stuck with them. 
Darry goes a bit easier on Sunshine than he does with Ponyboy. Part of that is because Sunshine and him are more alike than the other two siblings, so they understand each other better. The other part is that Darry thinks Sunshine is already taking on too much responsibility by trying to replace their mom. 
Darry taught her how to fight when she was like 9 and she’s gotten into good scraps with the Gang, but Darry and the rest are adamant that she stay out of fights because she’s too little. Sunshine is all too ready to toss out that she’s only a year younger than Ponyboy! To which the rest of the boys say, “He’s a kid, you’re a baby”. This in fact does not stop her from fighting when she needs to but she does try her best to stay out of trouble for Darry, especially after their parent’s deaths. 
She loved so much. Darry doesn’t say it nearly as much as he knows he should (and that applies to all his siblings) but he goes out of his way to make sure Sunshine has something special just for herself once in a while. Soda routinely suggests getting her a haircut when he notices her messing with it or hears her one off comment about not feeling pretty or looking nice. Ponyboy tries his best to help her out around the house or with her homework. She knows they love her and she loves them. 
42 notes · View notes
uchihaharlot · 8 months
Text
All this anti ship and hate has the windmill turning within me. Cooking up some of the most deplorable shit I can think of. To my regulars, I apologize if this isn’t what you signed up for.
Im still here, drafting your asks, but I have to feed the inner demon within me. The one that says do what the fuck I want and how I want it.
To the haters, this is for you. A more personal written ficlet. I hope it makes you wet and hard.
NFSW; age gapped familial fucking(eventually); reciprocated consent; Shisui x female (innocent and very virginal) cousin; yea I did it, again; tbc by @shisuis-left-nipple who is fighting the shipping war with me on this treacherous journey to whatever makes us horny. Fuck you, sincerely kiss my ass. 
Great now you have me thinking about a very deplorable Shisui who is training with his younger female cousin. Of age of course; but he is older and wiser. Knows better. Still, he is a man and every so often his gaze catches the curve of her waist and the swell of her breasts while she maneuvers fluidly during their spars.
Teasing him with the forbidden fruit unknowingly. Goddamn it. He is a grown ass man with morals. These were not thoughts you had about your 19-year-old cousin. Especially one he took under a wing and taught all his soul into. It was wrong and perverted. But how more often than not cousins were betrothed to one another, even now. The Uchiha were just as close knit as any other clan. Shisui kept record of the family tree, she was his third cousin and by default appropriate age to be adorned by a man. Almost a distant cousin by genetic material. Yet they all had the same characteristics. Dark hair, eyes and porcelain skin. The resemblance uncanny as ever.
If she acted out of inexperience, he tried to not to notice. Why should she have to worry about the exploits of a man. A man who was her cousin, a guardian. Who watched her grow and nurtured her potential. At what point did she become a woman behind his own eyes? Kaleidoscopes rerun their lives through his front temporal lobe. A vain attempt to save his sanity, his wavering morality and her innocence….
In all his years Shisui never once questioned his genius, but today he did. When it tightened his slacks and twisted the kaleidoscope behind his eyes on immoral charges. Further implicating his situation to a dire and deep carnal vision.
No, he could not. Not even as she took that dip into the chill of the creek, were they always had their cool down from a long days training. Not when she removed jōnin slacks, jacket and under shirt. Leaving just her unmentionables. This was highly inappropriate and part of him felt he failed her, maybe he should have Izumi continue her training? Or rather she was too old for a mentor to begin with. That it would be more appropriate of he graduated her already, though selfishly, he won’t.
‘Shisui?’ Her voice, like summers monsoon. Addled his mind and muddied his thoughts in its wistful wake.
‘Yea…just a minute…’ his eyes were unkind to him. Selfishly taking in her figure as she dipped below the waters tension.
Regardless, he still took to the water in the same state of undress. Carried by an undignified truth of silence. He wondered if she thought the same of him. Maybe?
This wasn’t by any means the most self deprecating thing Shisui has done. Though he wasn’t a constant contender in the ways of soliciting attention from young women. He found the older to be better, but the sentiment between the two had not fallen short on the teetering tightrope of Shisui’s inner demons.
It danced and sang praise to his desires. Take her! Claim her! Has his PTSD really gotten the best of him? Would he now spend his days tormenting himself with the thought of her salaciously beneath him? Is this how he would cope with returning from the war?
Y/n had missed him in his absence, this was why they still continued her training. The thought of letting her down again with another absence tore at him. No, he would just have to deal with it. With himself, after all. Life finds a way. Shisui could carry on and just let sleeping dogs lie.
When she splashed his stoic face in the water only then did he falter. An innocent attempt to garner his attention. “Shisui. You’re orbiting.” That he was, outer spacing the confines of his mind.
Herein lies where Shisui completely lost the respect for himself and his cock. The traitor only thought for itself and not for y/n. The leisurely way she trusted him moving hair from her eyes, a small but affectionate kiss to her forehead. Nothing out of the ordinary.
‘I am too old to be treated like a child,’ that playful retort sent Shisui further into the depths of his deplorable heart.
Yea… she was definitely too old to be treated like a child. Of course, the festering desire in the pit of his stomach churns. Shisui was bold; snaked an arm around her slick back and rested his hand over the small of it. Running the other up her forearm until his thumb rested in the palm of her hand.
She was not a child.
‘I can change that.’ Husky, warm. His breath thickens the air between them. Her sights zero in at his thumb in her palm before darting to red spun pearls.
The heat in her stomach pooled and flooded. Taken off guard but not unwelcome.
Oh.
Oh, how delicate was her skin on his, not nearly as calloused by her talent as his to decades. ‘Shisu-’ he slanted his lips over hers, cradling them in a delicate turn of the age kiss. One that matured a girl to a woman. She gave little resistance when his tongue ran the seam of her mouth and parted it for entry. Shisui brought her palm his thumb rested in to his hip and then cupped her cheek.
Delirious temptation. Right in his courtyard. Soft breaths flurried as she tried to regain her composure, a moan oscillated his mouth. The mixture of their hot air only fuels this delicate moment. If it weren’t for the cool water, Shisui might have had zero regard for her.
But she is his baby cousin, and he a man. Who else better to guide her into womanhood than Shisui of course. A selfish thought for a man hungered by greed, lust and apparently arrogance now. When had Shisui ever had what he wanted? The village only gave so much in return for his sacrifice. Blood and hard work, scars and that old resentment of being ostracized.
Yet, somehow he managed to pull himself together and part from her, leaving her breathy and confused and wanting. He doesn’t want to overwhelm her or push her, he is feeling guilty enough as is. Still, he is only a man. The forbidden fruit of his desires dangled in front of him, right within reach and his for the taking. Shisui’s mind flooding and inundating him with all the images he suppressed these past months.
Now, having felt her, touched her, kissed her, he can’t help himself. His pants never felt tighter, his treacherous cock deciding all by itself that his cousin is the home it wants to make comfortable in. He is so hard it borders on painful. Even worse, the water clearly giving away his intentions. It made his drawers stick prominently over his protruding arousal. Y/n’s eyes plastered at its immaculate sudden growth.
It was merely a kiss…and some tongue. Ok the bold touch to her back and cheek. It seemed it didn’t take much to rile the Uchiha up. ‘….let’s call it a day.’ Shisui felt so small saying those words. His younger cousin didn’t part with much else either, just flushed cheeks and a nod. This unspoken promise left Shisui feeling more dereliction than that selfish gratification he desperately sought.
Their walk home was grueling and quiet. Words could not describe the stagnant air that seemed to suffocate them both and forced them to maintain several feet of distance. Once out of the woods Shisui shuttled her home in a quick Shunshin of shame. Something that, in her younger years, they enjoyed the turbulence of. Was now a grim reminder that everything changed at the drop of a kunai. He begrudgingly watched as she entered her home. Less than a skip from his own, he was at his back door in half a flicker.
TBC. 😌 part 2
76 notes · View notes
darkmajesty-xo · 2 years
Text
18+ MDNI| tw! ProHero TodoDeku, Assistant! Reader, Age Gap Suggestive
a/n : this is an unedited poorly written thot that i had for christmastime, neglected it then thought to release it for icythots birthday. i'm sorry my love you deserve better but maybe someone will like it !
Tumblr media
midoriya is awful at hiding things.
snacks, secrets, feelings and especially presents. so, naturally birthdays are very stressful for him.
he tries his best each year but no matter how creative he thinks he is, his boyfriend always stumbles upon his hiding spots. it can get really frustrsting at times, and even though shoto says that it's okay and still pretends to be surprised with whatever allmight related collectable he gets him-- deku still wants to get this right!
so this year he had the bright idea of leaving the wrapped gift in his office drawer until the big day. midoriya is often up and out of the house by 5am for his morning jog and workout, with his bestfriend kacchan, while shoto sleeps in. however, since it's a "holiday" deku would forgo the gym sesh and drive over to their joined agency like a sneaky little elf.
it's honestly the perfect plan and he doesn't know why he didn't think of it sooner.
izuku was proudly mumbling to himself as he stepped off the elevator and into the office space when he noticed you sitting at your desk in the lobby. you'd been his and shoto's assistant for about a year now; a quirkless college grad with great references and eager to please. both men would describe you as a literal godsend-- single handedly organizing and restructuring the business aspects of their very chaotic agency.
don't judge the man, it's tough being the "on again off again" number one and japan's new "symbol of hope".
between keeping civilians safe and battling it out on the charts with kacchan every other week, he doesn't have time for paperwork and protocol. shoto, who sits comfortably at number 3, simply ignores paperwork and waits for somebody else to do it.
all of that to say that you were a super hardworking and valued employee but it still doesn't explain why you'd be at the office this early on the weekend.
"goodmorning, y/n".
you must not've heard the ding of the elevator because the sound of his voice startled you into spilling the contents of your mug all all over your keyboard.
"shit. shit. shit." you scrambled to blot the mess with your cardigan sleeves, shaking your head and worrying at your lips. deku was slightly amused. not because you'd spilled something but because he'd never heard you use profanities before. you were normally very reserved and meek. your submissiveness was something that he'd spoken about to you in the past because he felt like some of the sidekicks were taking advantage of your kindness. if deku had to list one toxic trait about you, it'd probably be that you were an extreme people pleaser. even moreso than him, and that's saying something.
"are you okay? i hope you didn't burn yourself".
you sighed, defeated, allowing yourself to glance at the annoying intruder only to be met with sparkling gemstone eyes and a soft smile. time has been well on midoriya. even with the slight crinkles by his eye and streaks of gray peppering his emerald green mop, he still looked as youthful as ever. the same deku that stole the hearts of many all those years ago- just a few more scars on his warlorn body and a softer layer to his midsection. but he looked great! if anything that extra thickness on his tummy only emphasized his mouthwatering biceps and juicy juicy thighs. he could probably crack your head open with those things.
"hey, sweetheart. are you okay?" he was closer now, the minty aroma of his cologne flowing into your space. your cheeks burned. here you were lusting over one of your very taken bosses, yet again.
"mr.deku! im fine, im fine. you just startled me is all" you breathed, brushing a stray loc away from your face. deku hummed, seemingly evaluating your strange reaction but choosing not to comment.
"why aren't you at home with your family? i could've sworn we gave all the administrative staff the day off".
"well i don't really have a family or anybody waiting for me, so i figured that i could get some work done. crime doesn't stop on the weekends" you shrugged. that didn't sit well with deku. he couldn't imagine you spending the day holed up in his agency.
"why don't you come home with me"?
it was hard not to laugh at the way your eyes widened. your mouth opening and closing in shock. it was so easy to fluster you. deku didn't know if it was due to your age or if you were just that innocent. he liked that. its perverted, he knows, but the thought of you on your knees staring up at him all doe eyed lived rent free in his mind.
"ouch, i didnt know that i was such bad company" he teased, just to get a rise out of you. and of course you took the bait. rushing to apologize. clarifying that you didn't want to be a bother. insisting that he haad much better things to do than babysit you. but deku wouldn't be deku if he took "no" for an answer, and that's how you wound up in your employer's kitchen watching him struggle to decide what he'd be preparing for his lover's birthday brunch. it was something that his friends did every year for eachother and he offered to host this time but there was one small problem…
deku can't cook.
sure he has the funds to hire a catering service but that seemed so impersonal. he wanted something that came from the heart! but after a couple tik tok videos and several pancakes on the floor- he started to rethink that decision. he then heard the little giggles coming from your direction. he turned towards you with a raised brow and you quickly put both hands on your mouth in response.
"what's so funny, little girl ?" he pointed his batter covered spatula towards you, only to get some on his freckled cheek. you laughed even harder this time, grabbing for your phone to take a picture. he liked seeing you like this, all free and relaxed.
"y'know i didn't see "bully" listed on your resume" he joked, pouting while dramatically turning his back to you. "don't expect a good reference letter from me when you go seek out greener pastures".
"oh please" you snorted, rising from your stool to join him at the stove. "where would i find something greener than your hair, mr. deku?" you teased, bumping him aside with your hip to grab the bowl of batter, "besides i'd never leave the two of you". it grew silent; the only sound being the sizzle of the batter hitting the pan. for a moment you thought you'd overstepped and began raking through your mind for save but the hero mimicked your earlier action-- softly bumping your hip to catch your attention. with flushed cheeks he smiled down at you making heat bloom witin your own cheeks.
"the feelings mutual, sweetheart".
after about two hours of cooking, with deku insisting on "mandatory snack breaks", the two of you had accomplished decenrt brunch spread with a fusion of japanese and american cuisine.
the two of were giggling over a pot of kenchinjiru when shoto sleepily shuffled into the kitchen. it was a welcomed sight to wake up to you and izuku being so cozy. he leaned against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, just admiring how well you fit with his partner, how comfortable you both seemed. he could've watched you all morning, had izuku not looked over his shoulder.
"oh! hey, sho. look at what i found" izuku chirped, happily petting you on top of the head. "izuku--" you whined shyly, glancing at the heterochromatic hero.
even fresh out of bed, shoto looked absolutely stunning. his silky strands were parted down the middle, falling loosely against his tailbone. his beautifull sculpted face held no imperfections, save for his iconic scar. however, his body told a different story. standing bare, in only his boxers, you could see battle scars littered against his pale flesh-- weaving against one another like the intricate lines of a tattoo. he'd always maintained a slimmer physique than deku, showcasing a smaller waist and chiseled abs lightly dusted with a bicolored happy trail that led to his scantily clad lower regions. the sight of shoto todoroki in nothing but his skin tight boxer briefs was mouth-watered. you eyes wandered a bit longer and lower than thet should've and the icy hot hero definitely took notice.
eyes locked on your own, sauntered towards the two of you and pulled izuku into a steamy kiss. the greenette was shocked, especially when his partner's hands dropped to grip his ass. he leaned into the other man's touch, moaning softly with each swipe of his tongue. you were as still as a statue, drinking in this erotic display of passion. yes, you'd seen them kiss around the agenc before but it was never more than a light peck. this was soft porn.
"goodmorning, baby" shoto whispered against izuku's lips. kissing him softly once more before pulling away and turning towards you. you didnt know what to expect but it surely wasn't him pulling you flush against his body, big hands resting on your hips while nuzzling his cheek against your own.
"what a nice surprise".
his voice was still husky with sleep and it tickled your skin. he pulled back slightly to get a better look at you. big bright eyes, rich skin and soft curves. the last thing he epected to wake up to was you in his arms, but its not like he's complaining. it's no secret that shoto fancies you. the only person unaware of his crush was you.
for the sake of decorum and professionality, in addition to his long-term relationship, he'd refrained asking you out directly. you were the best assistant they'd had and both men could tell that you were shy, so he would've hated to scare you off. he kept his efforts subtle. one time you mentioned how sweet you thought it was that him and izuku left eachother cute encouraging messages on their desks throughout the day, so he started leaving you cute little notes as well.
"you're doing great".
"i'm so happy you're here".
"you're the perfect little helper".
"you smell nice"
you didn't get the last one, it was intercepted by izuku who felt like it was borderline creepy. he didn't have any problems with shoto's crush/obsession with you; he actually encouraged ti, especially in the bedroom. but there was a time and a place for everything.
the two of you had been staring at eachother for a while when deku's voice brough you back to reality.
"do you mind excusing us for a second, love ? i'm sure you dont want to see this old man in his undies" Izuku giggled, while nudging his partner.
"she doesn't seem to min-
"shoto! bedroom, now."
the two men left you to your simmering soup, and thoughts while they trekked to their upstairs bedroom.
"you've really outdone yourself , izu" shoto began, "i was expecing another allmight figurine, not a threesome".
"shoto, baby, you gotta relax sometimes" izuku sighed. he searched through the drawers looking for a pair of shoto's sweat then threw them at the other man's head. "i saw her at the office this morning and invited her over because aparrently she's all alone. she just thinks she's here for your birthday brunch and has no idea about your little obession with her".
"MY 'little obession' ? wasn't it just last night that you begged me to fuck you like i'd fuck her ?"
Izuku ran his figners through his hair trying to ignore the emerging stiffness between his thighs from the memory.
"i- i will admit that i am attracted to her and after spending time with her this morning i can admit that i do like her BUT i am not the one that purposely gets hurt on patrol so that she'll fuss over me, and i'm definitely not the one that calls her for literally everything just so i can jerk off to her voice over the phone, am i ?"
"i will neither confirm nor deny those statements".
"exactly" izuku rolled his eyes, "m'gonna go check on her, k?"
"don't eat without me" shoto smirked.
"perv" izuku muttered, but winked back at his handsome boyfriend. he opened the door and there you stood wide-eyed with your hand over your mouth.
his eye twitched. they'd just been busted discussing you in a very lewd manner. he was just about to apologize but you did it first
"i'm so so sorry, mr deku. i didnt mean to listen, i just wanted to tell mr shoto 'happy birthday' but then i heard you talking and i didnt know what to do because i have been in love with the two of you since i started working and i never imagined--
izuku interrupted your ramblings with a soft kiss and gestured to shoto who was already sitting on the bed, cock in hand.
"how about we make it a very happy birthday, love ?"
482 notes · View notes
REQUESTED
jennifer jareau x black!femme!reader
includes derek and savannah morgan, emily prentiss, luke alvez, tara lewis, emily prentiss, matt simmons, penelope garcia and spencer reid. no mentions of rossi or the others. mentions will.
After two years of dating JJ, mostly behind closed doors, you finally meet JJ's friends.
Basic fluff
Unspecified age gap, but reader is an adult. Reader is related to Savannah. Mentions of divorce. Mentions of coming out. Nondescript mentions of sexual conduct. Mentions of drunkenness. Hints at past-Jemily. No use of Y/N.
2.4K WORDS
not really sure how i feel about this. sorry. it's not my favorite thing, and can't say im super proud of it tbh. but, it kind of helped my rut.
Tumblr media
JJ found herself tinkering with the watch on her wrist. Tonight was going to be an important night. You were finally meeting the team. It had been on the books for weeks, and it had taken months for you to have been able to mention it with her eyes nearing jumping out of their sockets. They were her family, after all. And, you? You were special. She wasn't sure what she was worried most about, them not liking you or you not liking them.
She sighs, pushing herself off the frame of the front door. You should have been out of the bathroom right now.
"Are you almost ready?"
You dropped your arms, just enough that the mascara in your hands is no longer close to your eye. She's called out to you, not even five minutes ago. Three minutes was generous, even. It was starting to get a bit, frustrating.
"Jennifer!" You call back with nothing else to really say after. You just want her to hear in your tone how tired you are of her asking. After a moment, you hear footsteps, and you huff. She steps into the bathroom, and you look up in the mirror. She's ready, and she looks good. Casual enough, jeans and teeshirt. Her make up was minimal, but she looked gorgeous, as usual. You speak up before she does, "Baby, stop bugging me. I'm getting ready, okay? We finna go to a bar, not a dinner reservation. Can you just stop rushing me?"
JJ ignores the question, zeroing in on your middle statement. "Exactly, we are going to a bar to meet them. So, what's all this? You don't have to go all out for them."
"You should know better than to think I'm getting gussied up for anyone but me." You retort, finishing up your mascara.
"You look beautiful, already," she sighs, leaning against the bathroom doorframe, "Can't you just, wrap it up? Your makeup looks about done."
You twist the cap back on your mascara and look up at her with a smile as you know what you're about to say is not going to be music to her ears. "My makeup is done. Now, I have to do my hair."
JJ groans, turning her body away from you. Her back, now, flat against the frame, she leans back against it. Eyes closed with a deep exhale, she slides down a wall. You have the most beautiful, artful head of hair ever. And, damn, if you didn't do a damn good job about making it into any masterpiece you wanted. But, God, did it take forever. She texts her team that you guys are going to be a little late, tells that they she would like them to meet you while they are at least mostly sober.
Emily reads JJ's text and sighs. She slides her phone into her back pocket, annoucing, "Beers only, for now, guys. They're going to be here a little late, and JJ wants us to be fairly sober when they get here."
Matt takes a swig of his bottle, "Did she say how long they were gonna be?"
"Uh, no, but she said her girlfriend was doing her hair," Emily answers, shrugging, "So, it shouldn't be too much longer." Derek and Savannah exchange looks before laughing. Seeing as Savannah had introduced JJ to you, she and Derek were the only ones who knew anything about you. Including how you looked, and more particularly, knew it would take a bit of time for you to do your hair. Emily squinted, as did the rest of the team, "What's so funny?"
Savannah amused, shakes her head while Derek answers through his laughter, "Nothing, I'm just saying that, if JJ wants us to be sober when they show up then we should switch to water."
The team talks amongst themselves, enjoying their night out. The first night out in a while, that they've gotten to enjoy Derek and Savannah's company. So, they make the most of it, while they wait. In fact, they were having such a good time, they had completely lost track of how long they had been waiting. The filled their drinking gap alternating between beers and water, and occassionally, ordering a round of shots. Then, the door opens, and Penelope gasps about someone so gorgeous she felt blinded. The team follows her line of sight, set directly on the door. As Savannah jumps up excitedly and moves around Derek to approach you, JJ walks in right behind you, after having just held the door for you. You grab her hand the moment she's close enough.
"Damn," Luke exhales, "JJ's girlfriend is.." He trails off, catching himself before he finds himself on the recieving end of pointed looks and the back Garcia's hand smacking his chest.
Maybe it's because he cut himself off, maybe it's because everyone's too busy staring with their jaws knocking between their ankles but neither reactions come. Instead, they just hum along while Emily lets out a quiet, "Tell me about it."
Derek laughs, "Pick your jaws up off the floor before they get here and JJ catches your eyes."
Matt is the first pull his eyes away and thus, respond. "Aw, c'mon, JJ doesn't really strike me as the possessive type."
Emily, getting flashbacks from years ago, tears her eyes away from the couple, getting this far away look in her eye as she murmurs, "Oh, yes, she is."
Matt, Luke and Tara give her a curious look as Reid, Derek and Garcia exchange looks because they know where Emily's mind went. Before Emily went to London, things between the two of them, made team nights out really uncomfortable sometimes. Even moreso, when Will was with them, confused as they were. How JJ didn't realize she was gay until two years ago will forever be something that confuses them. When they get closer, they stand in anticipation to greet the stunning couple. When they are within earshot, the group clammers over the sound of each other's voices to greet JJ, who's arm is tight on your waist because Luke still has that glazed over look in his eye when he looks at you. Dumbstruck and in love, and your body is going to pay the cost of that later.
"I'm sorry we're late," JJ says, after greeting her team back.
You smile, "It takes work to be this pretty."
"No, it doesn't," JJ argues, "You're always that beautiful."
Penelope squeals, "You guys are so cute." She locks eyes on you, pointing, "You, you are gorgeous."
You laugh, extending your hand to her, "You must be Garcia," and when she excitedly confirms, shaking your hand with a vigor you should have been expecting but was still surprised by, you introduce yourself to her. Letting go of her hand, Emily introduces herself to you and you make your way around the group. Before getting around to Derek and hugging him instead of shaking his hand.
"Oh, so you know two know each other?" Emily asks.
JJ's eyes sparkle as she bites back a laugh, looking at Derek and Savannah both, "You guys didn't tell them?"
Reid squints, "What was he supposed to tell us?"
"You were being so secretive about your relationship, I didn't say a thing." He answers.
You answer Reid, "They," pointing to Derek and Savannah, "introduced us."
"Wait," Tara asks, motioning between you and Derek and Savannah, "So, how is it that you know each other."
JJ immediately goes cherry red as you look at her, seeing if she would be willing to answer since she brought it up, and all. You laugh. She's still mildly embarrassed, certainly not ashamed, but it's still a fact that flusters her.
"She," you start, pointing to Savannah, "is my Aunt." Derek laughs as jaws drop and JJ's eyes become wide and glued to the floor. Luke and Tara start making cradle robbing jokes at JJ's expense, and you didn't think it was possible for her to become more red, but she did. You defend her, "To be fair, it took me six months of relentlessness for her to see me as the adult woman that I am, so please, hop up off my woman." And, you laugh, but you're kind of serious. You've never loved age gap jokes from the outside, and you weren't comfortable enough yet with JJ's friends for you to find them funny.
Savannah slides back into the conversation, "Okay, also, to be fair, I became an aunt rather early in life. So."
Now, they're dying to know how you two met, exactly. Which makes JJ's blush deepen because she does remember the first time she saw you. You think those six months of your effort was because she didn't see you as a woman, but it was really more because she was trying not to see you as a woman. The moment she saw you, she isn't going to say she fell in love with you, but she definitely imagined herself fucking you. In so many ways, so many positions. She imagined the way your moans and whimpers would sound in her ear, imagined how your sweat and arousal would taste on her tongue.
She had only recently truly realized she liked women; it's why she and Will separated, why he went back to New Orleans, and she hadn't even verbalized her newfound self discovery outloud to herself, much less to anyone else.
Furthermore, she had been leaning heavily on Derek and Savannah during this difficult time, as he and Savannah were helping her out with the boys. So, the very last thing she needed to be doing so imagining all the ways she could possibly having their niece screaming her name, but that's what she was doing. And, your sizing her up and giving her those flirtatious glances did her zero favors. Then, you started giving her more than suggestive glances, and she thought the devil sent you to her. So, not wanting to complicate her friendship with the Morgans, she did her best to keep a respective distance, but you made it so hard every single time she saw you. Because you'd openly wanted her just about as much as she wanted you in her mind.
Eventually, the two of you found yourself to be alone, and JJ did her best, but the chemistry was electric. After six months of trying to do the right thing, she had ended up absolutely railing you in your bedroom. And, you were caught as soon as Derek and Savannah came back home with the kids. So, as JJ blushed and blushed and avoided every eye in the room as you weren't shy about it at all, though, thankfully, you did spare them all the sweetest details.
"A go getter," Matt nodded, thinking back to when he met Kristy, lifting his beer to tip at you, "I respect it."
Emily's mind did some quick math, "Wait, is she the reason you came out?"
"Well," JJ looked at you with that lovesick twinkle in her eyes, "She certainly helped."
"I wasn't sure you would ever come out," Reid chimes in. And, everyone mutters their agreeance. If what Emily, Derek and Penelope are doing can be considered muttering.
"Aye," you speak, defensively. JJ looks slightly offended, and slightly is enough for you to say something, "Some journeys are longer and harder than others. She came out when she was ready."
"Protective, too," Tara notes, looking at JJ, "I like her." And, she's not the only one to say so.
The conversation shifts as they pry to get to know you. Penelope fires a million questions at you, and she's pushy about you answering. Apparently, she had tried to look you up, but you aren't active enough on your socials to give her much insight. She was firing questions at you a mile a minute, and you were just as honest as you needed to be. You were losing track of how many questions you'd answered in this, and sensing your tiredness, JJ slides in to your rescue.
"Penelope," She cuts her off mid question, "This isn't going to be the only time you see her," She gives that smile, the one does when things are tense. Or, when she's nervous. Or, when she's forcing herself to be polite, "Leave some mystery to her."
"Right, right," Penelope concedes, "I'm sorry. I've just waited so long to meet you, and now that I'm meeting you my excitement has not wound down because you're so stunning, and you two are stunning together, and JJ has been so happy. I've never seen JJ this happy, not ever since I've known her, and I didn't even realize she wasn't quite happy until I've seen her truly happy, and seeing her happy just makes me so happy," she leans forward, takes one of your hands in both of hers, "I am so happy that you make her so happy. Thank you for making her so happy."
Your eyes soften as her ramble comes to an end, and when you look at JJ, she's give you that puppy eyed look she only seems to fix on you. You steal a small kiss from her, and Reid averts his eyes out of respect while the rest of the table coos at the two of you like children do.
It makes you keep the kiss short. JJ rolls her eyes when she pulls away and looks back at them, but even so, there's a fondess to the action. She switches the conversation, though. Takes it to something more casual and pulls the focus away from you and y'all's relationship. Things amongst the group settle easy then. You guys have plenty of drinks and you have so much more fun than you expected. You didn't expect things to go badly, but you honestly hadn't expected to mesh with everyone so well.
By the end of the night, the only person good enough to drive is Derek, and you all find yourselves cramming up in his SUV, heading back to his place for an impromptu, drunken sleepover. With the exception of Matt, who has Kristy come and pick him up. When you back to yours and your Aunt Savannah's house, you give Reid, Tara, Luke and Penelope some blankets for them to set themselves up and pass out in the living room while you and JJ go curl up in each other's arms in your room.
"Your friends are nice," you murmur against her neck, drifting off to sleep in her arms.
JJ -- both too tired and too drunk to revel in the newly formed bond between her favorite people -- simply falls asleep right after you with a faint smile on her lips.
107 notes · View notes
celestie0 · 1 month
Note
hi pookie! unrelated to fanfic but i think you were in a gap year earlier and now ur bio says ur a med student. did u get into med school? if so, congrats!!!
actually i'm also in a gap yr and i was wondering how you made sure to be productive every day? like im literally rotting in bed every day lmao bc my day has no structure. sorry if this is too personal and if it is feel free to ignore!!
hiii my love yes i did!! i graduated last year in june n then started med school a few weeks ago :)
oh that's awesomee first of all congratulations on graduating!! that's a wonderful accomplishment. i'm assuming it's only been a couple months since you've graduated? there's no harm at all in taking a break
but yea i think the straightforward answer haha: probably working a job will give you the most structure. i worked full time at a clinic that was a little further away from my house so it ended up eating up a lot of my weekdays (leave house at 7am come home at 6pm type thing) but it was great for the structure and purpose. if you're not feeling like you can work a full time job, then you can work part time too. i left my full time job and started working at a research lab part time and it was a really nice balance of structure to rest before starting school
i'm not sure what your circumstances are, or if working is in your capacities at the moment, but yea like whether you're currently job hunting (i know how bad the job market can be ahhh) or if you're studying for the mcat or whatever you're doing in your gap year, i think the best way to have structure without work is cultivate a good morning routine and cultivate your hobbies. i found most days i would wake up at 6am i'd have much more productive days than days where i'd sleep in to 9/10am and then i'd just feel awful and rot in bed the rest of the day haha. so if you can just get that first couple of hours of the day right, i think you'll be in a good position. but yea cultivating hobbies is also important bc we all crave/need purpose in life, and i think a hobby is great way to have that if you're not getting it from career sources.
yeah and like idk if this is more random advice but i think my biggest piece of advice i'd give someone in their gap year is to just kinda take the time to get to know yourself? get to know what gives you energy and excitement or what interests you. i think you can find this out by testing hobbies, reading books, going out and experiencing stuffs. as premeds, i think undergrad can really suck the soul out of you and make you lose touch w yourself w all the pressures and time spent working towards your application, so having that time during your gap year to just kinda chill n recenter yourself is super precious n valuable.
don't worry too much if you're having days where you're resting, but i think the important distinction to make is: are you resting because it's a voluntary action that you want to do, or are you resting because you're putting off other things? asking yourself that question really helps put power back into your hands to improve your day to day, especially when you're struggling to find structure or purpose
hope this helps bb :0 much lovee to ya <3
21 notes · View notes