#i wanted to make the caption lyrics to Hope to Die but this art was too silly for that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rooksamoris · 5 months

Note

Hi, there! :D

I saw that orders are open so I want to try to make my shot.

Romantic headcanons about the Scarabia duo with a reader (fem or neutral) who loves to sing and usually sings love songs to her/them respective boyfriend as a sign of her/them devotion and love🩷💕

Your Jamil and Kalim fics have made me gain a deep affection for those two characters and I love when you include Arabs in said fics, it seems beautiful to me. If my order does not convince you, you can discard it but if not, take your time and without pressure, thank you 🌌🌠🩷💕💐✨❤️Someday I will make some fan arts of your fics :D

💞 — in which they love the sound of your voice.

💞 — kalim al-asim, jamil viper (separately)

💞 — warnings: none, this is pure fluff and romance

💞 — 940 words. i hope i did your request justice!! also, that comment about making fanart made me squeal. i genuinely think that is the best compliment someone can get <333

KALIM AL-ASIM.

🩷 — Listen, the moment you are singing, he is joining you.

🩷 — It reminds him of the festivals in the Scalding Sands, where people sang for everything—pride for their homeland, love for their darlings, the taste of the cuisine—nearly everything was taken and made into a song.

🩷 — But the moment you start singing about love to him, sevens he feels so special. It motivates him to do just about everything. Music is such a perfect love language, and he could just die happily hearing you weave lyrics about romance to him. It makes him feel like your muse.

🩷 — Whenever he is sitting on a divan pillow, staring down at the work he does not want to complete, he glances over to you, carmine eyes all pleading. He just wants you to sing something so he can feel motivated to do his work again.

🩷 — The songs in his homeland are played more classically, with the oud (middle eastern lute) and the tablah (hand drums), and he loves that, but he is more pulled in by experimental sounds.

🩷 — His pure love for music causes him to introduce you to a lot of his favorite artists and he asks if he can play for you while you sing. Overall, it is a match made in heaven.

🩷 — He invites you to the Light Music Club’s meetings and he is constantly trying to get you to join the club. If you join, he will be extremely happy. Cater would post you guys on his social media with some sort of caption like ‘if he wanted to…’ and the comments are filled with single people talking about how they want to lay down in the middle of the highway—

🩷 — Kalim’s favorite thing is when you sing exclusively for him.

🩷 — Sure, he thinks that music should be shared with everyone, but sometimes he just wants to lock away those moments for just the two of you. Nothing is as romantic as him resting at your side, listening to the smooth melodies that would spill from your lips like the morning dew slipping off the leaves of palm trees.

“Can you sing another song?” Kalim asked, his head resting in your lap. It was just the two of you on this balcony of the Scarabia dorm. Your fingers were weaved into his hair and his golden coined headband was discarded off to the side to give you the perfect access to the white tresses. You laughed, smiling down at him as your hand trailed from his hair to his cheek, caressing his pretty and plump brown skin, “I already sang three songs for you, Kalim,” He pouted. “You, my love, are too spoiled,” you said, light-heartedly. His pouting did work since you began to sing another love song, weaving him the songs of romance that he yearned for so much.

JAMIL VIPER.

🩷 — Jamil, like Kalim, has emotional attachments to music. Nostalgia is the easiest way into anyone’s heart, and he was no different.

🩷 — Sometimes when he walked through the halls of Kalim’s estate, he could hear the other servants singing songs to keep them company. It helped them ignore any of the pains of labor and the reality of their servitude. He used to think it was stupid, but now he hums those songs as he cooks alone in the vast kitchen of Scarabia.

🩷 — If you sing for him, he only wants it to be in private.

🩷 — He never really got to have anything for himself, so whenever you are dedicating songs of romance to him, he prefers it to be in a place where it is just you two. He likes it especially when you are undoing the braids in his hair and brushing through the long dark brown strands for him.

🩷 — Soon enough, he catches onto the melodies you sing and they become the tunes he hums while cooking and cleaning. It especially happens when he knows you are not going to be joining him for a meal. Your songs make him feel close to you, even when you are not around.

🩷 — You once caught him sweeping the halls humming one of the romantic songs you sang to him. His head even swayed slightly to the beat, but the moment he saw you, he blushed and tugged his hood down, mumbling something about how he should make you wear anklets so that he could hear you before you catch him like this.

🩷 — He always had a love for music and dancing, but it always reminded him of having to dull his talents for Kalim’s take.

🩷 — Your singing strengthens that bygone love that he had for his music. It is the one thing that not a single person can take from him and claim he was too lowly to deserve it because you gave it to him willingly.

🩷 — Jamil is so in love. Your voice is like mango nectar on a hot summer day—sweet and healing.

He always loved it when you brewed him tea, singing whatever song came to your mind. It always made him just want to grab you, which he did. Jamil’s arms slipped around your waist and he sighed, stuffing his face in the crook of your neck. He was exhausted after all the work. You stopped singing and patted his head, “Tired?” He nodded and he let out a few curses in his native language, before kissing your collar, “Keep singing,” he muttered. All he wanted to do was fall asleep to the sound of your voice while he waited for the tea to be finished. You obliged.

#💖 — amoris writes #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #jamil viper #twisted wonderland x reader #kalim al asim #twst headcanons #jamil viper x reader #kalim al asim x reader

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fivepointpalettes · 2 years

Note

Pallets like this v

With long names and such!

My sincerest apologies for how long it took to compile this list. I tried to pick out the ones which were either significantly longer, or were... particular, one way or another, for lack of a better word. I tried to avoid song lyrics and such, but with some of them I couldn't help myself.

Hope you find these sufficient!

Looking through my older posts, this type of longer caption was a relatively recent development, but I nonetheless tried to pick ones that might work for you! I originally tried to sort them by topic, but there were so many... you can probably guess the point at which I have given up. I’m sorry. There were just so many.

Sorry I didn’t Realize People Like You Have Feelings

She Was A Girl He Was A Traffic Cone

You Must Have Real Self Confidence Mortal To Attempt Flirting With Something All Holy

Just Friends But We Kiss Sometimes

Let Your Tender Hands Rip Me Apart

Let Me Be Your Unreliable Narrator, Baby!

Focus On Me (Ignore The Blood)

I See You Everywhere See You Everywhere See You Everywhere

Prove That You Love Me And Reanimate Me

Stand Still As The Darkness Grows Roots In Your Mind

The Lack Of Self Esteem I’ve Felt Since I Learned How To Read Or Write

Not Great With People But Pretty Good With Milk

Lost In Your Eyes Never To Be Found

I Saw The End Of The World In Your Eyes

I Touch You And My Hands Burn My Hands Burn My Hands Burn (What Have You Done)

What Are You Doing In My House / Now Now I Don’t Usually Make It A Habit To - Stop Yelling - Break Into People’s Homes But As You Can See Sometimes I Do

Well First Of All I Am Positive What You Did Is A Criminal Offense / And Second Of All Why Didn’t You Invite Me

Once Again I Am Forced To Ask What In The World Did You Bring Into Our Home / What Do You Mean What Did I Bring It’s Very Clearly A Radioactive Waste Barrel Don’t Pretend You Don’t Know That

What’s A Little Murder Between Friends

Hey Quick Question Are We Really About To Commit Arson?

Does This Taste Expired To You Too?

It’s Even Smaller On The Inside If You Can Believe That

Only One Thing In This Room Is Edible And Good Luck Figuring Out Which One It Is

Your House Has No Anomalies But I’m Reporting You For Bad Taste In Art

I Think I Know What A Rat Looks Like

How Many Rains Will It Take Before The Ceiling Starts Leaking

I’m Sorry I Chewed Through Your Walls But You Must Understand I’m Calcium Deficient

Please Be Mindful Of The Evil Yoghurt Demon In The Freezer

Who Put Strawberries In The Bathtub

Who Put Strawberries In The Bathtub Again

This Is The Third Time Someone Put Strawberries In The Bathtub Who Keeps Doing This Please Stop

Of All The Things You Could Be Doing Why Are You Romancing Soda Cans

Soda Cans Are Great I Love Accidentally Spilling Liquid On Myself

It’s Not A Good Cake But It’s Not A Bad Cake Either (As Still It Is Cake)

Scallops Reside Where My Brain Should Be

Date A Girl Who’s Secretly A 20 Meter Long Man-Eating Centipede

Being In Love And How It Sucks Sometimes

Wish We Could Go Out For Coffee But You Hate Me And I Hate Coffee

Do You Remember When You Told Me That You Love Me When You Told Me That You Love Me When You Told Me That You

I Loved You I Did So How Did We End Up Like This

This Will Hurt You More Than It’ll Hurt Me - And That’s Okay!

I Need You To Understand That I Really Do Want What’s Best For You - And That Simply Isn’t Me

Father I Do Not Wish To Consume The Cough Syrup

The Doctor Tried To Check My Heartbeat Only To Find Out I Don’t Have One

American Girls Scare Me

I’m Always At Least A Little Bit Scared Hopeless And Frustrated

The Annoying Whisper In The Back Of Your Head

The Shadow Out The Corner Of Your Eye

Can You Help Me Find What’s Wrong With Me

Too Old To Die Young And Too Young To Just Die

Plunge Head-First Into A Worldwide Panic Attack

Unexplainable Excruciating Pain That Started Suddenly And Will Never Go Away

Wasting Your Life Feeling Like An Underperforming Tool In Someone Else’s Hands

An Unhealthy Relationship With One’s Own Identity

Men Like Us Aren’t Supposed To Feel These Things

Men Like Us Die Alone Because We Think We Deserve It

My Body Is A Craft Store

My Lungs Are Full Of Ink

The Tall Faceless Lad Out The Corner Of My Eye Who Watches Me Sleep While Pointing At The Door

Peeling An Apple Just To Eat The Skin

Biting Into A Rubber Ball Like An Apple While Maintaining Full Eye Contact

For Sale A Set Of Gold Teeth Never Used

I’m Just A Normal Functioning Member Of The Human Race And There Is No Way Anyone Can Prove Otherwise

Visual Representation Of The Sound A Rainbow Makes

The Man Whose Hands Are Always Covered In Melted Butter

The Girl In A Blue Dress That Lives In Every Village Ever

The Boy With A Mouthful Of Chalk

I’m A Weirdo Who Likes To Eat Chalk

The Magical Princess’s Strawberry-Scented Battle Axe Of Infinite Bloodshed

Although You Are Yeay Smsll And Your Kind Have Existed In The Universe For Only A Shore Tihe You Are An Inportant Part Of Sohething Yery Large And Very Bcavtiful

A Friend Is Someone Who Belieuse In Gon Euen When Gon'ue Ceased To Belieue In Gonrseif

How To Completely Disapp8ar Be Found And Never

Your Smile Toasty As Yarm As Spiver

My Face When Face When My F When Facle The Fwhen Thface Mey Face Face When My

The Breathing Part Of Who Knew By The Correspondents

Can You Imagine If Los Angeles Was A Real City

Tower Cranes Are My Favourite Animal

When I Was A Small Child I Held An Iguana Once

Ed Sheeran Is My Enemy He Looks Like A Hot Dog

I Hate Citations Why Can’t You Just Trust Me

A Classmate Of Mine Once Borrowed One Of My Pens And Then Decided It Was Such A Good Pen He’s Just Gonna Keep It

Sconce Doesn’t Sound Like A Word To Me But It Is One

Spells Mom With An O To Confuse People Trying To Guess My Nationality

The Parasocial Relationship I Have Formed With The Duolingo Cast

Sorry That Your Rant About How The Game I Like Ruined The Whole Series Forever Didn’t Make Me Like It Any Less

For The Longest Time I Was Convinced That Pocky Was A Wooden Stick Covered In Chocolate And People Were Eating It Purely For The Anime Aesthetic

My Girlfriend Said I Eat Corn Weird Which Now That I Think About It Would Explain Why I’m Consistently Covered In Butter

Wishing To Rant About Fanfiction But Not Wanting To Show How Much Of A Nerd You Secretely Are

The Eye Lips Eye Emoji Face Fills Me With Unbridled Rage

When I Was A Child I Was Afraid Of Eating Mars Bars / Because I Thought They Had Fish Food In Them

The Frankly Terrifying Clip Art I Found When I Googled Champignons

Doctors Say You Need A Consistent Amount Of Sleep To Be Healthy So I Consistently Sleep For 4 Hours A Night

Whether You Qualify As A Beach Or Not Depends On The Amount Of Sand You Have Consumed In A Lifetime

Only The Floor Candy Can Sustain Me

I Am Irrationally Afraid Of Paper And Plastic

Tainted Love But The Clapping Is Replaced With The Law & Order Sound Effect

Softer Cleaner And Fresher Clothes For The Low Cost Of Your Firstborn Child

What Will It Take For You To Give Up Your Humanity And Become One With The Night

The Price Of Wisdom Is Bad Grammar

The Eternal Dance Set To The Sweet Melody Of My Out-Of-Tune Guitar

Been Hiding From Myself Since The Last Time I Died

Don’t Aspire To Be Average You Can Go So Much Lower

My Heart Was Stolen By A Blue-Haired Angel With Piercing Eyes And A Penchant For Singing

Lonely Sewer Cryptid Looking For Love

With All Due Respect Sir This Is A Plum

You Call It Birth I Call It Escapism

Falling In Reverse Just Means Getting Up

The Privilege Of Being Born Somebody Else

The Act Of Balancing A Bottle Of Juice On Your Head

My Favourite Ride In The Theme Park Is A Bench

They Stole My Blood Today

Me And My Lungs Love You

On The Outside I May Look Like A Regular Man But On The Inside I’m A Japanese Spider Crab

My Head Is Full Of Froyo

Seychelles Flag But The Colours Are Out Of Order And Now Also Inverted

Slam-Dunking A Toaster

Chugging A Bottle Of Body Wash

Grandma Stop Touching The Stove \ No Need To Confirm It’s Not On

I Found God Inside An Apple Core

Some Days I’m Afraid I Will Cut My Eyes By The Sight Of Glass Shards

Look At Her Go Biting Everyone Who Comes Near Her Like A Champ

I Apologize If You Found Finding This Place Difficult But You Must Understand I Am Currently Evading Detection And Arrest For Crimes Undisclosed

God’s Gift To Women (Promptly Returned)

Getting Hunted For Sport With Your Good Friend Bates

So Good At Sleeping I Could Do It With My Eyes Closed

Your Teeth (Hand Them Over)

An Overemotional State Projected Upon The Unsuspecting Public

What If You Could Glow In The Dark

You’re As Beautiful As The Light Reflecting Off The Teeth Of The Moon

Why Are You Sleeping In The Algae Pond

Write Your Love In The Blood Coursing Through My Veins

Please Relieve Me Of The Dreams Plaguing My Every Waking Moment

And If You Thought It Was A Threat It Might Have Been

Find Yourself In The Patterns On The Wall

The Horrifying Ordeal Of Having Loud Neighbours

Putting On A Show To Seem Alive / When I Don’t Feel Alive

Time Has Stopped Passing A Long Time Ago

Once Again A Cold Rainy Winter Gives Way To A Cold Rainy Spring

Here’s Cheers To The Man Who Stole My Heart Away

Please Stop Eating Bugs It’s Weird

You Made Me The Villain Of Your Story Darling Now Own Up To It Won’t You

If Someone Tries To Shoot You Simply Tell The Bullet To Leave You Alone

She Drowned Jupiter In Her Martini Glass

The Sort Of Love You Only Feel When Drunk

It’s Past My Bedtime And I’m Thinking Of You

Say The Apples Seem Strange This Year

The Man Who Looked At Me So Sweetly In Soft Flavours Of Deep Beige

Oh Baby Don’t You Know Our Sort Is Locked Out Of Heaven

There’s No ‘You’ In 'My Cup Of Tea'

You Have To Stop Making So Many Enemies

Now We’re Cooking With Lasers

Middle Of The Night Yet You’re Wide Awake Thinking About Waluigi

You Have This Power Inside And It’s Frightening

You And Me And The Aquarium Between Us

I Don’t Know What This Is But It’s Not An Avocado

Wish Me Luck Honey (I Couldn’t Ask For More)

All The Things You Did Before You Did Them

You Ought To Stop Eating Spiders It’s Creeping The Guests Out

It Sure Is Wet In Here I’ll Tell You What

I’ve Been Chugging Poison Waiting For The Day You Inevitably Take Me Up On My Offer And Take A Proper Bite Out Of Me

Keep All Body Parts On The Inside Of The Vehicle At All Times As Failure To Comply May Result In Having Them Unwillingly Removed

Drowning In A Coffee Cup (What An Awful Way To Go)

Do The Trees Bite Where You’re From

My Overconfidence Is Astounding And It’s A Surprise I’ve Never Been Killed

I Understand Where You’re Coming From But Where Did You Get The Gun

Have You Found Yourself Or Your Loved Ones Suffering From A Case Of Empty Eyes

We Wouldn’t Be Here If SOMEONE Didn’t Spill Ketchup On The Sheets

Tastes Like Hot Sugar On A Sharp Knife

As You Can Tell By The Yellow Filter We Just Entered Mexico

You’re Telling Me He Died From The Mould? And What Did The Mould Do, Stab Him?

One Of These Beans Tastes Like Cola And The Other Tastes Like Black Mould

Next Time Maybe Don’t Go Into The Forest At Night Hm Buddy? Just A Thought

Well That Was A Little Unnecessarily Brutal Don’t You Think?

Tender Words And Hellish Screams

Too Cool To Sleep At A Reasonable Hour

For A Place Called Silent Hill It Sure Is Horribly Noisy

Smoke’s Water And We’re Water Therefore We Are Bleach

Your Love Tastes Like A Heart Attack

Pixy Stix and Broken Bones

You Smell Like Nonsense With A Hint Of Melancholy

Crying Because Cats Are Cute And Deserve The World

I’m Sick But The Bags Under My Eyes Are Sicker

I Live In A Room With No Windows

I Haven’t Left The House In Months

Don’t Stand So Close To The TV Lest The Static Claims You

Forever Dizzy In This Lonely World

Day 243 The Wall Effigy Started Talking To Me

I’m Not Happy Unless I’m Miserable

Summer Lasts A Week At Best But My Dedication To Sweater Vests Is Eternal So Look Me In The Eye Little Teacup And Melt If It Bothers You So Much

Chicken Nuggets Heat Up Faster On The Higher Shelf Of The Oven Because Of Their Proximity To God

It’s Summer (Hot Weather Turns My People Violent)

You Can’t Just Ask A Guy Why He’s In Love

Seeing The French Everywhere Might Be A Side Effect Of Something And I Have Yet To Find Out What But It Could Be Asbestos

Remember When We Would Stay Up All Night Reading Fanfic On Our Phones

What Do You Know About Being Divine

Couldn’t Believe When You Said You Were A Deity

When I Was A Child I Thought / That The Word Rainbow Had Eight Letters / And That One Of Them Was D

Who Needs Sleep When I Can Just Drop Dead For A Rest

I Don’t Check My Email In Fear Someone Tried To Contact Me Via Email

I Saw A Bumblebee Today And It Was Huge Really Absolutely Massive

Mid-Performance Chainsaw Solo

I Want To Drown In Your Swimming Pool

Feelings Of An Almost Human Nature

Can’t Let It Slip That There’s More To Me Than Little Old I

Manual Therapy For Anxious Hands

A Sense Of Failure Wasting Away And Never Living Up To Your Full Potential Unable To Get Things Done And Putting Everything Off Because You Are Scared Of Progress

He To Whom The Cake’s Dedicated

You’re Quite Pleasant But The Pleasure Is Mine

What Dropping A Large Bag Of Coal On Your Foot Feels Like

I’m One Of Those Annoying People Who Would Rather Use Fifty Commas Than Shorten The Sentence

Seeing The Future In The Tear Stains On Your Cheeks

Do You Ever Feel Crowded In A Lonely Room

I Want To Eat Eggs Whole Shell And All

Adopt Your Enemies To Establish Dominance

I’ve Existed For Thousands Of Years Before Gaining Sentience

You Are A Dream In A Crowd Of Nightmares

Get Your Shoes Off My Bed You Animal

Do Not Invite Me To Your DnD Party Unless You Are Ready To Accept The Consequences

Too Good For Heaven Too Bad For Hell

I’m Not Above Eating Off The Floor

I Distinctly Remember The Time He Stayed With Us

I Know I May Look Like A Real Person But I Am Actually Not A Real Person At All

When It Comes To Near Death Experiences I’m An Expert

Your Skin Smells Like The Last Days Of Summer

I Never Learned How To Write

God Wouldn’t Have Wanted This / But This Isn’t About God / It’s About Our New Dish Soap / Now Available In Supermarkets Near You

Do You Remember Your First Time Tasting Water

You Know How Sometimes An Unwanted Guest Comes Over And You Do All You Can To Make Them Leave While Remaining Polite

Fizzy Brained Children Are So Troublesome

I Forgot What The Antagonist Of Legend Of Zelda Was Called And For A Good Moment Thought It Was Gandalf

You’re The First Descendant In A Line Of Workaholics Utterly Convinced Your Willingness To Sacrifice Your Own Health Determines Your Worth As A Human Being And Promptly Working Yourself To Death To Provide Unto Others What You Never Had A Chance To Understand You Deserved Yourself

I Am The Mirror In Which You Can See All The Evil In The World

So Far Throughout My Life I Got Mildly Electrocuted On Three Separate Occasions

Asking My DM Friend To Put A Light-Emitting Crab In Our Game

Leaving The Fridge At 3 In The Morning

Pepsi Makes My Teeth Go Numb

Peach Yoghurt Tastes Better With Whipped Cream

Thinking About Him (The Enlightened Prophet)

There’s A Strange Man Hiding In The Fruit Aisle

My Brain Operates On Frequencies You’ve Never Even Heard Of

The Curious Desire For Overwhelmingly Vivid Symmetry

My Computer Chair Broke So Now I’m Stuck Here Leaning To The Right

People Ask Me How I Manage To Think Of You Everyday And To Be Completely Honest I Never Know What To Say Because It Feels So Natural

Pepsi Running Through My Veins

What Flavour Is Your Mind

Sorry My Dad Said I Can’t Join Your Cult Today For I’m Grounded

Squirrels Ate My Will To Live

Being Told I’m Allowed To Make My Final Class Project About Any Topic I Want Awakens A Demon Inside Me That Makes Me Subject My Classmates To Only The Finest Of My Obscure Interests

Standing In Front Of Me She Quickly Undressed Confessing Her Desire To Cause Me Physical Harm And Needless To Say I Was Baffled But Nonetheless Intrigued

You Love Them Now You’ll Hate Them Later

The Only Thing Greater Than My Ego Is My Impostor Syndrome

Don’t Try To Tell Me How I’m Supposed To Breathe

Why Is There Fish Bait In The Fridge Again

You Scream Ancient Curses In Long Dead Languages And Perish Surrounded By Friends

The Subtle Taste Of La Croix And Gentrification

The Cons Of Being My Friend Greatly Outweigh The Pros

You Are Who We Say You Are Because Public Opinion Beats Self Worth Every Time

Angels Lost Their Charm When You Walked In

Some Days I Feel Like A Lobster On A Skateboard

Make Yourself Comfortable We’ll Be Falling For A While

Bleed Your Soul And Blind Your Eyes

You Can Stay At My Place But You’ll Never Find Me There

Had A Dream Today That Hastur Was A Canon Character In Deltarune (I Woke Up With Enough Adrenaline To Bypass Anxiety And Respond To My E-Mails)

Murder And Other Expressions Of Love

You Locked Me In A Cage And Threw Away The Key And When You Found Someone Better I Was Left To Gnaw On The Bars For My Freedom

What Do You MEAN There Was A Fire

Cough Syrup Flavours According To Tumblr User Darkangelofglory

A Little Weirdo Driven By Consumption

Does A Straw Have One Hole Or Two

I Want That Coca Cola Limelight

Clouds Did Not Exist Before 1997

More Dish Soap Than God Intended To Exist

Some Days The World Is Too Bright To Function

Sometimes I Look Up The Last Minutes Of A Movie I’ve Seen Before Because I’m Not Ready For The Emotional Investment Of Going Through The Plot’s Ups And Downs But Crave The Gratification Of A Happy Ending

My Companion Looked In Horror At The Scene Unfolding Before Our Very Eyes Before Finally Saying Out Loud What We’ve All Been Thinking / Did He… Did He Steal Her Teeth?

Give Me Salvation I Swear I Won’t Bite

Your Love Has Brought Me To The Point Of No Returning

I Can’t Get The Bees Out Of My Teeth

Open The Fridge Dear (I Promise I’m Not In It)

Please Don’t Lick The Walls

Two Egg Yolks Six Teaspoons Of Sugar And A Tablespoon Of Cocoa

Go To Sleep In The Morning And Wake Up At Noon Only To Go Back To Sleep Till Evening And Wake Up Full Of Regret And With A Headache

The Infinite Game Or The Inevitable Disappointment Induced By The Terminality Of Things And Its Ability To Ruin One’s Enjoyment Of The Thing In Question

If A Mushroom Can See Itself As A God So Can You

I Sold My Lungs On The Black Market

This Man Shoved His Face In a Tub Of Soap Bubbles - What Happened Next May Surprise You

A Sort Of Soft Paste Which Tastes Like Perfume

I’ve Nothing But Contempt For Fahrenheit

The Little People At The Bottom Of The Ocean

When I Grow Up I Want To Be Fruit Juice

You’re Being Hunted (By Me)

He Kinda Looks Like He’s Sucking On A Brick

Crying Over A Chicken Nugget

Slide-Whistles You To Death

All The Personality Of A Collapsed Lung

The Burning Fragrance Of Cleaning Supplies

The First Time You Scraped Your Knee Falling Off A Bike

Go Ahead And Floor It Luv

A Toast To Our Special Little Brand Of Sin

Dunks You In Tea LOL

Sipping Sunflower Oil From A Wine Glass

Even The Mushrooms Mourn Losing You

You And All Your Money That You’ve Stolen From The Poor

Where Do You Get Off Poisoning My Tea

The Man Of Wine And Cigarette Smoke

#Long Post

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blackswaneuroparedux · 3 years

Text

Anonymous asked: As a beginner in Classics I love your Classicist themed posts. I find your caption perfect posts a lot to think upon. I suppose it’s been more than a few years since you read Classics at Cambridge but my question is do you still bother to read any Classic texts and if so what are you currently reading?

I don’t know whether to be flattered or get depressed by your (sincere) remarks. Thank you so much for reminding me how old I must come across as my youngish Millennial bones are already starting to creak from all my sins of past sport injuries and physical exertions. I’m reminded of what J.R.R Tolkien wrote, “I feel thin, sort of stretched, like butter scraped over too much bread.” I know the feeling (sigh).

But pay heed, dear follower, to what Menander said of old age, Τίμα το γήρας, ου γαρ έρχεται μόνον (respect old age, for it does not come alone). Presumably he means we all carry baggage. One hopes that will be wisdom which is often in the form of experience, suffering, and regret. So I’m not ready to trade in my high heels and hiking boots for a walking stick and granny glasses just yet.

To answer your question, yes, I still to read Classical literature and poetry in their original text alongside trustworthy translations. Every day in fact.

I learned Latin when I was around 8 or 9 years old and Greek came later - my father and grandfather are Classicists - and so it would be hard to shake it off even if I tried.

So why ‘bother’ to read Classics? There are several reasons. First, the Classics are the Swiss Army knife to unpick my understanding other European languages that I grew up with learning. Second, it increases my cultural literacy out of which you can form informed aesthetic judgements about any art form from art, music, and literature. Third, Classical history is our shared history which is so important to fathom one’s roots and traditions. Fourth, spending time with the Classics - poetry, myth, literature, history - inspires moral insight and virtue. Fifth, grappling with classical literature informs the mind by developing intellectual discipline, reason, and logic.

And finally, and perhaps one I find especially important, is that engaging with Classical literature, poetry, or history, is incredibly humbling; for the classical world first codified the great virtues of prudence, temperance, justice, loyalty, sacrifice, and courage. These are qualities that we all painfully fall short of in our every day lives and yet we still aspire to such heights.

I’m quite eclectic in my reading. I don’t really have a method other than what my mood happens to be. I have my trusty battered note book and pen and I sit my arse down to translate passages wherever I can carve out a place to think. It’s my answer to staving off premature dementia when I really get old because quite frankly I’m useless at Soduku. We spend so much time staring at screens and passively texting that we don’t allow ourselves to slow down and think that physically writing gives you that luxury of slow motion time and space. In writing things out you are taking the time to reflect on thoughts behind the written word.

I do make a point of reading Homer’s The Odyssey every year because it’s just one of my favourite stories of all time. Herodotus and Thucydides were authors I used to read almost every day when I was in the military and especially when I went out to war in Afghanistan. Not so much these days. Of the Greek poets, I still read Euripides for weighty stuff and Aristophanes for toilet humour. Aeschylus, Archilochus and Alcman, Sappho, Hesiod, and Mimnermus, Anacreon, Simonides, and others I read sporadically.

I read more Latin than Greek if I am honest. From Seneca, Caesar, Cicero, Sallust, Tacitus, Livy, Apuleius, Virgil, Ovid, the younger Pliny to Augustine (yes, that Saint Augustine of Hippo). Again, there is no method. I pull out a copy from my book shelves and put it in my tote bag when I know I’m going on a plane trip for work reasons.

At the moment I am spending time with Horace. More precisely, his famous odes.

Of all the Greek and Latin poets, I feel spiritually comfortable with Horace. He praises a simple life of moderation in a much gentler tone than other Roman writers. Although Horace’s odes were written in imitation of Greek writers like Sappho, I like his take on friendship, love, alcohol, Roman politics and poetry itself. With the arguable exception of Virgil, there is no more celebrated Roman poet than Horace. His Odes set a fashion among English speakers that come to bear on poets to this day. His Ars Poetica, a rumination on the art of poetry in the form of a letter, is one of the seminal works of literary criticism. Ben Jonson, Pope, Auden, and Frost are but a few of the major poets of the English language who owe a debt to the Roman.

We owe to Horace the phrases, “carpe diem” or “seize the day” and the “golden mean” for his beloved moderation. Victorian poet Alfred Lord Tennyson, of Ancient Mariner fame, praised the odes in verse and Wilfred Owen’s great World War I poem, Dulce et Decorum est, is a response to Horace’s oft-quoted belief that it is “sweet and fitting” to die for one’s country.

Unlike many poets, Horace lived a full life. And not always a happy one. Horace was born in Venusia, a small town in southern Italy, to a formerly enslaved mother. He was fortunate to have been the recipient of intense parental direction. His father spent a comparable fortune on his education, sending him to Rome to study. He later studied in Athens amidst the Stoics and Epicurean philosophers, immersing himself in Greek poetry. While led a life of scholarly idyll in Athens, a revolution came to Rome. Julius Caesar was murdered, and Horace fatefully lined up behind Brutus in the conflicts that would ensue. His learning enabled him to become a commander during the Battle of Philippi, but Horace saw his forces routed by those of Octavian and Mark Antony, another stop on the former’s road to becoming Emperor Augustus.

When he returned to Italy, Horace found that his family’s estate had been expropriated by Rome, and Horace was, according to his writings, left destitute. In 39 B.C., after Augustus granted amnesty, Horace became a secretary in the Roman treasury by buying the position of questor's scribe. In 38, Horace met and became the client of the artists' patron Maecenas, a close lieutenant to Augustus, who provided Horace with a villa in the Sabine Hills. From there he began to write his satires. Horace became the major lyric Latin poet of the era of the Augustus age. He is famed for his Odes as well as his caustic satires, and his book on writing, the Ars Poetica. His life and career were owed to Augustus, who was close to his patron, Maecenas. From this lofty, if tenuous, position, Horace became the voice of the new Roman Empire. When Horace died at age 59, he left his estate to Augustus and was buried near the tomb of his patron Maecenas.

Horace’s simple diction and exquisite arrangement give the odes an inevitable quality; the expression makes familiar thoughts new. While the language of the odes may be simple, their structure is complex. The odes can be seen as rhetorical arguments with a kind of logic that leads the reader to sometimes unexpected places. His odes speak of a love of the countryside that dedicates a farmer to his ancestral lands; exposes the ambition that drives one man to Olympic glory, another to political acclaim, and a third to wealth; the greed that compels the merchant to brave dangerous seas again and again rather than live modestly but safely; and even the tensions between the sexes that are at the root of the odes about relationships with women.

What I like then about Horace is his sense of moderation and he shows the gap between what we think we want and what we actually need. Horace has a preference for the small and simple over the grandiose. He’s all for independence and self-reliance.

If there is one thing I would nit pick Horace upon is his flippancy to the value of the religious and spiritual. The gods are often on his lips, but, in defiance of much contemporary feeling, he absolutely denied an afterlife - which as a Christian I would disagree with. So inevitably “gather ye rosebuds while ye may” is an ever recurrent theme, though Horace insists on a Golden Mean of moderation - deploring excess and always refusing, deprecating, dissuading.

All in all he champions the quiet life, a prayer I think many men and women pray to the gods to grant them when they are caught in the open Aegean, and a dark cloud has blotted out the moon, and the sailors no longer have the bright stars to guide them. A quiet life is the prayer of Thrace when madness leads to war. A quiet life is the prayer of the Medes when fighting with painted quivers: a commodity, Grosphus, that cannot be bought by jewels or purple or gold? For no riches, no consul’s lictor, can move on the disorders of an unhappy mind and the anxieties that flutter around coffered ceilings.

Caelum non animum mutant qui trans mare currunt (they change their sky, not their soul, who rush across the sea.)

Part of Horace’s persona - lack of political ambition, satisfaction with his life, gratitude for his land, and pride in his craft and the recognition it wins him - is an expression of an intricate web of awareness of place. Reading Horace will centre you and get you to focus on what is most important in life. In Horace’s discussion of what people in his society value, and where they place their energy and time, we can find something familiar. Horace brings his reader to the question - what do we value?

Much like many of our own societies, Rome was bustling with trade and commerce, ambition, and an area of vast, diverse civilisation. People there faced similar decisions as we do today, in what we pursue and why. As many of us debate our place and purpose in our world, our poet reassures us all. We have been coursing through Mondays for thousands of years. Horace beckons us: take a brief moment from the day’s busy hours. Stretch a little, close your eyes while facing the warm sun, and hear the birds and the quiet stream. The mind that is happy for the present should refuse to worry about what is further ahead; it should dilute bitter things with a mild smile.

I would encourage anyone to read these treasures in translations. For you though, as a budding Classicist, read the texts in Latin and Greek if you can. Wrestle with the word. The struggle is its own reward. Whether one reads from the original or from a worthy translation, the moral virtue (one hopes) is wisdom and enlightenment.

Pulvis et umbra sumus

(We are but dust and shadow.)

Thanks for your question.

#question #ask #classical #greek #latin #horace #poetry #literature #arts #cambridge #classics #personal #study #habits #reading #books #culture #personal growth

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baekhvuns · 4 years

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I just read your “ateez as dad’s” reaction, and it was so adorable that could we see the members of bts as Dad’s?? thank you!!

bangtan reactions ; requested

。。。bangtan as dad's ( this is definitely my favourite type of reactions to do )

── kim seokjin ;

imagine him making his kids sit on his broad ass shoulders while they play with his chocolate brown hair.

his kids getting his worldwide handsome looks from the minute they pop out the womb.

he’s a sag, we know his kids be the best dressed.

omg imagine when his kids grow old, and he’s teaching his daughter how to drive, he’ll be so soft with her, “nooo, take the right—yes yes good job!”

and then when he’s with his son, the asian dad comes out. “aY, WATCH YOUR SPEED— OHMYGOD DID YOU JUST RUN A RED LIGHT?”

“dad, the light was green.”

“YOU JUST RAN A LIGHT, YOU IDIOT!” smacks his kid on the head.

i think when as his kids grow older, the more funny jin gets, random dad jokes being thrown around.

imagine getting ready for a wedding event or some party, and he’s yelling that he’s starting the car when he’s sitting on the bed with his phone scrolling through the army cafe.

── kim namjoon ;

man, i don’t even know (this is too soft)

best dad, wbk (i think it’s a leader thing, all leaders in kpop, would be such amazing dad’s)

buys his kids magical and deep meaning story books that he reads to them every night before bed.

he finally put the baby shoes he bought to a proper use, and then buys every single colour in it because his kid really liked them.

imagine joon, in his tux with glasses (the fit he wore to grammy’s) while he’s holding his son while standing tall and the media gushes over how adorable the pair is. crying

his kid holding one of his fingers while walking down the streets or the red carpet while wobbling on their feets.

“dada?” his kid calls for him while he’s in his office, he pauses and smiles, waving his kid to come over and places them on the table. while he writes songs, his kid plays with either his hair or the jewelry he was wearing.

definitely as his kids grow older he gets a bit stricter, cause he has his moments here and there.

when it’s time for his kids looking for girlfriend’s or boyfriend’s, he’ll have the talk with them and give them advice while walking back and forth like a lecturer.

── min yoongi ;

he’d be the sweetest dad ever, 🥺

calls his kids his angels, imagine his kids get his gummy smile (I WOULD DIE)

imagine yoongs buying his kids small little bucket hats that cover their entire faces and he just takes selfies with them and posts it on the army cafe with the caption, “look at my angels, army.”

i think he’d be a very open minded dad, although he’s on the quieter side many would think he’s really strict and stern kinda like a sergeant.

but in reality he’s a dad who gives his those ticklish kisses when someone puts their face in the kids stomach (ifykwim) and they’d fall into a giggly mess.

whoever hurts his kids, better start running, whether it be teachers or some random kids on the block or heck even the “fans”

no one hurts his family, he’ll work in quietness and place a lawsuit on the people who hurt them.

agustd mixtapes would include a song that would be titled the birthdate of his first born as a present to them and army. as well as have a separate song for his kids titled ‘my one and only’

as his kids grow older and his daughter introduces her boyfriend to him, i think we all know the poor young man would be scared shitless of the agustd.

“if you want to date my daughter, rap better than me.”

yeah, goodluck.

── jung hoseok ;

get ready for a very adventurous dad,

wakes his kid early mornings for random trips down by the bay, all while they whine and he stands there in his dad sandals grinning proudly.

jiwoo would spoil the shit out of hobi’s kids, his kids would be dressed in those pretty aesthetic outfits.

he makes them smol little rainbow bracelets and puts them around their little baby wrists. 🥺

always has his kid propped up on his hip, whenever he dances or shows other trainees and teaches them how to do certain moves, his kids watch him with bright shiny eyes.

the trainees awe at his kids, omg imagine his kids bopping their heads to the beat while clapping their hands like dolphins while hobi dances.

his kids would be dance prodigy’s, i said what i said.

matching outfits with his lil babies !! imagine hope comes home and finds his kid playing with his colourful glasses with his shirt over their heads, softly giggling 🥺

── park jimin ;

ma’am, i will tell you, he would be the strictest dad in bangtan.

i think we all watched that hello counsellor episode where he was angry at the boy who put his dolls before his family.

he’d be a great dad, of course, he loves kids and would do anything for his own. but of course, he’d be on a stricter side.

i see him constantly comparing his pinky finger with his little kids because he finally has someone who’s pinky fingers aren’t bigger than his.

his relaxing time is whenever his kids are close to him, imagine his kids hiding their faces in jimin’s neck because they’d be shy by the amount of people taking their photos and you would just hear the armies go, “AWWWWWW.” honestly same.

he’d bring his kids to bangtan’s concerts! as toddlers he would bring them out during the encore time while holding his hands and making them sing a little bit of bangtan’s songs in their baby voices 😩

as more adults, like around 8-9, he’d bring them to more music shows but send them home early because it’s bed time, but not before kissing them a goodnight.

let’s face it, his kids be the hottest. his kids would be listed as the hottest celebrity kids alongside many other’s and jimin would just boast about it everywhere.

he’s really proud of his kids and won’t hesitate to show it in private moments or even in public moments.

dance classes with dad jimin >>>

── kim taehyung ;

he loves kids, a lot.

he’d do anything for them, the friend dad, his kids would forever be his first priority.

watch his kids get the entirety of his facial genes which would automatically make them prettier / handsomer than 99% percent of the population.

takes his kids to art gallery’s around the world, shows his artistic side to his kids who also enjoy.

painting with his kids would be his favourite time of the day, imagine his kids little fingers doing finger painting and showing it off to tae who would be more than proud and start clapping loudly.

tae’s big hands would cradle his babies faces and squish their cheeks as they fall into fits of giggles, tae’s heart just swells whenever he hears his kids laugh.

bro honestly, tae’s treated like a president, his kids would like the first kids of the country, constant headlines of tae and his kids holding hands would go viral while we all suffer bc we could never 🙃

so, uh, if you mess with his family, consider yourself done, after all he’s the kim taehyung.

as much as he’s proud of his kids, he would be secretive about his private life, as in he wouldn’t want to expose his kids to the world of being a celebrity and being famous beyond.

but imagine, the day he introduces his kids to the world (idk but i’m seeing his son) while wearing a nice tux with black hair, one hand in his pocket while the other over his son’s shoulders.

people would be shocked because his kid is the exact copy of him, but we would be shocked because another kim taehyung is born.

── jeon jungkook ;

welcome to world of wholesomeness, your stay would be making you uwu a lot.

imagine his kids playing with kooks long hair and he lets them hairstyle it however they want. with pretty pink rubber bands

hIS KIDS WILL GET HIS BUNNY TEETH OR WE RIOTING.

his (idk but i’m seeing a son again) son would have his shiny eyes and bunny teeth, overall would be so adorable that kook would have a heart attack whenever his baby would look at him.

imagine you coming home and seeing both your kids sleeping on him, one over his chest while the other his sprawled over his stomach, and you hear the soft snoring of the three of them echoing around the room.

takes candid pictures of his kids whenever they’re having fun in the playground or at road trips, omg imagine him and his kids singing singing to songs while kook drives down the pretty road.

whenever a bangtan song comes on ten radio his kids would start screaming and kook would be smiling all brightly while glancing at them through the mirror while shouting the lyrics himself.

writes songs for his kids, his lullabies would be heavenly.

i also think he’d be a strict dad, after jimin, i think he’ll take on that position.

only when they are slightly older, because kids make mistakes and kook will take it to his responsibility to teach them the right things and to repeat what’s the righteous.

he would be more stricter towards his sons while being more favourable towards his daughters because they got his eyes and he can’t ever say no to them.

no, but he would be great friends with his son, they would play almost any sports together, whether it be online or in person.

really tries his best to be the best dad for his kids and no matter what happens he’ll always be by their side.

#✉️ : ask #this was so cute <3 #bts reactions #bts #bangtan #bangtan reaction #kpop reactions #bts imagines #bts fluff #bts requests

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