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#i was teetering on the edge of alcoholism for a long time and now i hate drinking lmaooooo
mercuryislove · 5 months
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so i've been Not Drinking since december 12th (i will admit i've had a shower beer here and there) but tonight i had a hashtag Real Drink for the first time in four months and let me tell you. it's not even fun to drink anymore. am i maturing? maybe i just like to be sober and miserable instead of drunk and miserable
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sugurusyndrome · 2 months
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cw/tags: mild degradation, best friend!suguru, car sex, mild spanking, jealousy, edging, slight drunkenness, dirty talk galore, geto likes his hair pulled, oral (geto receives), fingering, little buildup it’s all sex, fem!reader
i wanna ruin our friendship
—— ❈ ——
If you didn’t know any better, you would have thought your best friend was possessed. Jaw clenched, long fingers tapping erratically on the steering wheel, annoyed breaths puffing out incrementally. He was usually gentle and relaxed.
“You wanna stop being passive aggressive and say what you’re thinking?” You said, irritation twitching your eye as you watched cars zoom by.
“What makes you think anything is bothering me?” Geto shot back. It was not lost on you how his hand tightened around the wheel.
You tiredly rubbed your eyes and your fingers came out mascara-streaked. Flipping open the visor mirror, you thumbed under your eyebags to clean the smudge. “It might have to do with the fact that you keep sighing like an annoyed toddler,” you replied and snapped the mirror shut.
“Nope, nothing’s wrong,” he insisted. Rock music blared through the speakers as he increased the volume. Oh, that irritated the fuck out of you and you practically smashed the ‘Off’ button. “What the fuck?” he said gruffly when the music abruptly cut off.
“We’re adults and I expect you to communicate like so,” You said coolly. No point of both of you losing your temper. Even though he was usually the level-headed one in the friendship, clearly something was up.
Geto was silent for a moment, jaw twitching. Then, he pulled over to the shoulder of the road and unbuckled his seatbelt, turning to face you. “You have a lot of attitude for someone who needed a ride home at midnight,”
Your eyes widened then your brows knitted inwards. “You told me I could call you if I ever needed a ride home,” you replied. “And I said I was sorry for waking you up three times. What’s the issue?”
He groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Did you realize that men were leering at you? It was gross but you were painfully oblivious,”
A slow eyebrow raised and a hint of a smile, eyes wide. A beat, then: “Are you jealous, Suguru?”
Now, this was your best friend you’re talking to. Someone who knows you more than most people. Were there constant sex jokes and drunken touches that teetered on inappropriate? Sure, but that’s what all best friends do.
Right?
Geto mimicked your expression sans the smile. “Are you fucking with me?”
“I don’t know, you tell me,” Your smirk twitched and you leaned over the console. “Are you jealous, Sugu?” you cooed mockingly.
“Don’t call me that,” he whispered hoarsely. He hates that nickname and it’s a rare trigger to his aggravation.
It could have been the alcohol running through your veins that emboldened you or maybe the fact that flirting with him came as second nature but you didn’t spare a second thought to hooking your finger through his necklace. You’d gifted the black agate to him for his 26th and he’d never taken it since.
“Are you jealous, Sugu?”
He let himself be tugged towards you and his irritated expression faded, only to be replaced with a wicked, wicked glint in his eye. “Do you want me to be, sweetheart?” That caught you off guard and you blinked.
Taking advantage of your guard down, Geto wrapped his hand around your wrist, pulling you even closer. “I think you want me to ruin this sweet friendship of ours,” He whispered, his lips a hair's breadth away from yours.
“If I kiss you now, will I taste another man?” Barely brushing your upper lip before licking his own lips.
I wanna fuck our friendship away.
Insane. Absolute fucking insanity.
And yet…
“Why don’t you find out?” You replied in a hushed whisper. He could smell the alcohol as your chest rose and fell in rapid, shallow breaths. Cute.
Perhaps the flirting all this time was not harmless or friendly but all thought about anything not related to Geto’s lips in your mind ceased when his tongue licked your mouth open. Shameless, you leaned right into him with a moan and his little growl vibrated in his throat. Against all odds, the kiss was slow. Huh, it would stand to reason that someone as calm and kind would kiss like that, actually.
Glittery nails scraped down his neck, absentmindedly tracing the spiderweb tattoo and he responded by trapping your bottom lip with his teeth. Violet eyes slit open to watch your reaction as he let go of your lip with a wet pop.
“Strawberries” he murmured, the word spilling out like honey.
Your kiss-clouded mind couldn’t understand what he meant. “Huh?”
“Your lips,” Two fingers under your chin followed by another kiss, lips parting with a soft squelch. “Taste—“Another stolen. “mmm…like strawberries,”
A dazed giggle brushed against his mouth. “Guess you didn’t taste a man on them,”
Geto replied with a chuckle of his own and it was too nonchalant. “No, I did not.” His canines gave both of your lips a sharp nip. “But you’ll taste like me soon enough,”
Oh, fuck me.
“Bold. I like it,” His smile widened and you realized you said it aloud. Moaned it, probably. Mortifying
“Seeing as I’m a gentleman—” With an oomph, you found yourself pulled over the console and straddled on his lap. “I’ll do what the lady wants,”
Just looking at his lazy grin and bewitching violet eyes, you can tell he will be anything but a gentleman.
────────────────────
At some point during the night, you had blood-red lipstick painted on your lips; a little smudged from the party but nothing too messy. That is until your best friend’s balls were slapping against your face while you were knee deep in his seat. To be fair, you were the one who dove down. Team effort or whatever.
“That’s it, gorgeous. That’s—fuuuck,” His eyes rolled to the back of his head, his palm firmly pressing down to keep his cock buried deep, deep down your throat until he abruptly pulled you back by your hair. You caught your breath with a sharp gasp and he shuddered out a heavy breath at being edged for the third time now. Like he’s not doing it to himself.
Roughly cupping your cheeks with one hand, he smashes your lips together in a painful wet kiss and you would have been grossed out at how messy it is but the feeling of his hot cock leaking on your bare thigh made all rationale fly out the window.
“You like being edged, Sugu?” You teased breathlessly once you’ve forced yourself to pull away.
At this rate, his cock is twitching every time that damned nickname left those spit-slicked lips. “And here I thought you heard me in the shower every time I slept over,” He teased back, opening up the car console.
With one hand, he lifted the condom to his mouth while his other hand palmed your cunt to slip two fingers inside. A synchronous moan left both of you and you widened your thighs around his lap. “Suguru, don’t be such a fucking tease,”
He grinned around the foil of the condom wrapping. “Would never dream of it, beautiful,” He twisted his wrist deeper and you immediately clamped down, trapping his digits. “Oh? Did I find that special spot—Ohhh,” He moaned with you when the pads of his fingers pressed just right— you felt like he was almost mocking you.
Not that you cared for a second longer, not when he started pistoning his finger sloppily into your cunt, slick dripping down his hand and onto the leather car seat. “Shitshit, don’t stop,” The squeaks that left you were practically unrecognizable. “Your fingers…fucking amazing,”
You were practically riding his fingers and Geto leered at the sight. You shouldn’t be enjoying this but— “You’ve been dreaming about this, haven’t you?” He finished your thought for you. “Over time, all those sex jokes became less of a joke with me, hm?”
“M-Maybe,” That fucking bastard.
He curled his fingers inside you with his thumb now circling your clit rapidly. “Lucky for you, I can read between the lines. And because I’m a gentleman,” He stole a kiss, swallowing your moans. “I’ll give you a choice,”
“W-Wha..?” You managed out.
Geto slowed his fingers—mercy or torture, who knows—and you whined. “Cum on my fingers or my cock. Your choice, gorgeous,”
“Suguru, I was so close,” You whimpered, clawing at his hand to press his palm to your dripping pussy. Without rhythm, you ground down on his palm, tossing your head back with relief. But it wasn’t enough.
You didn’t take being edged too lightly. Unlike a certain raven-head who simply couldn’t stop leering. Really, for someone who was grossed out at the men at the party doing it, he sure was going all out.
He tutted and grabbed your wrists to stop you from clawing at his hand. “The longer you take to decide, the more your sweet cunt will cry,” His middle finger lightly circled just the tip of your engorged clit.
A dry sob rippled through your body at his torturous touches. “Fuck you, Suguru,”
“I’m trying to, baby—”
“Your dick!” That pathetic screech was nearly unrecognizable to both of you but did you care what you looked or sounded like right now? Absolutely not a flying fuck. “Your cock, Suguru. Now.”
You watched him place the foil between pearly whites and rip it open, spitting the torn bit out. The movement was desperate, sloppy, and it had no right being downright filthy. But here you were, leaking all over his lap.
His hand swiped your pussy, eliciting a sharp inhale from you, and he slicked the condom with your glistening arousal. “Shit…why would I need lube when I—ah—got this dripping pussy? C’mere, gorgeous,”
Taking a hold of his shoulders, you lifted your hips so he can hurry the fuck up and fuck you. But no, he took his time sliding his fat tip across your entrance, your swollen lips just barely stretching around him. No amount of whining and attempted intervention nudged him fully inside. It’s like he didn’t even hear you, eyes glued to your pussy.
Geto was edging himself and you were getting the short end of the stick.
“Suguru, I swear to—Oh fuuuck…” Any thoughts or snarls died the moment he thrust up into you. He filled you up so perfectly you thought the universe definitely created your pussy just for his dick.
Geto had his head tilted back, teeth digging into his bottom lip while his hand death-gripped your hips. “Not yet, beautiful,” he hissed when you tried to start riding him. “Unless you want me to blow my load not even a minute in?”
Back arching toward him, your hand gripped his black agate necklace while your mouth brushed against his ear. “Sugu…baby…” You whimpered softly and you felt him loosen just a smidge when he shifted beneath you.
Bingo. You yanked at his necklace, bringing your faces mere centimeters away from each other. “Fuck. Me. Now.”
Catlike violet eyes widened at the sudden movement before they hooded again. Strong hands gripped your asscheeks before he thrust up testingly. Your whimper gave him all the answers he needed to bury himself to the hilt.
“S-Suguru…y-yes—fuuuck!” Your hips joined in on the dance and soon, your entire body was bouncing atop his cock.
“So sloppy—mmm…” Geto captured your lips hungrily. “So fuckin’ dirty,” He jiggled your ass obscenely, spanking them when you least expected. “What a dirty cunt you got. Who knew my best friend had something like that between those slutty legs?”
A whiny moan ripped from your throat at the impact and your back arched further against him, smashing your chests together. “Fuck, keep d-doing that, Sugu,”
“Hmm? Do what, gorgeous?” He purred against your ear. “Spanking that pretty ass pink?” He punctuated his words with another sharp impact. “Or do you wanna hear about what a dirty girl you are?”
Your palm slapped on the foggy window, dragging down as your hips rolled atop that sinfully heavenly cock. “Bo…Both—ah!” A gasped response scraped out of your throat. His meaty tip battered your sweet spot relentlessly and you just knew you were not going to last long.
Geto’s grin was felt before it was seen and his fingers dug crescents into your ass as he took control. “When was the last time this pretty pussy was pounded properly, hm?” He panted, adjusting his hips so that his cock lodged further into you.
He didn’t wait for a response; there was no way he was getting one from you, not when you were drooling on his lips and your eyes briefly crossed with each spank on plump reddened cheeks.
“Cock got your tongue, beautiful?” He taunted in a cooing tone. “Do you wanna come? You wanna come all over this cock, don’t you? I bet you’ll drench me and my car. I’ll be able to smell you for days to come.” He nuzzled into your neck to latch on your sensitive pulse point. “M’dirty girl…”
Everything was simply too much. Flames started as a little flicker licking up your ankles before flashing up your spine and you shattered, euphoric cries ricocheting in the vehicle. Geto groaned when he felt your fingers gripping his hair from the back; the dual sensation of that delicious sting and your wet cunt squeezing him had him following. Even through the condom, you felt him pulse milky ribbons.
He collapsed against the carseat, arms clinging to your sweaty back as you both caught your breath. This isn’t how either of you expected the night to end. An argument? Sure. An argument that leads to you bouncing prettily on his cock in ways he’d only witnessed in his dreams? A man can only dream and fulfill.
Geto watched you lift your head and chuckled breathlessly at your fucked-out expression, the glow radiating off of your flushed cheeks. He swiped his thumb along what remains of your lipstick before popping it in his mouth. “Told you I’d have you tasting like me by the end of the night.”
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nadvs · 6 months
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cam girl (part twelve) (end)
pairing rafe cameron x female reader
rating explicit 18+
content warning alcohol use
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
summary you work two jobs. by day, you’re a maid for the cameron household, where rafe degrades you any chance he can get. by night, you’re a cam girl, hiding your face so nobody can recognize you. when you discover your new subscriber, the filthy-mouthed man obsessively paying you to do everything he can think of, is rafe, you’re not sure what to do next.
» masterlist
*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*
Rafe realizes his hands are shaking as he rereads your text.
His eyes keep going over your words, standing up off his bed and pacing around his room just because the adrenaline won’t let him stay seated.
Why the fuck are you doing this to him?
i’m done. this is over. i’m not even a fucking person to you am i
Hot anger bubbles inside his chest. He immediately texts you back: what the fuck do you mean
Minutes pass. You don’t answer.
Rafe: ?????
Again. No answer.
Rafe: dont ignore me
He can’t take it anymore. He taps on the Call button. It rings and rings and rings. He texts you again.
Rafe: answer me
Finally, you respond: i dont need to listen to you. leave me alone
This has to be a cruel joke. Yet again, you’re cold to him out of fucking nowhere, after he thought you had a good time together.
Rafe recalls this morning, to the worried look on your face when you saw his black eye, making him think that maybe you see something of value past the wall he built around him.
He risked his pride by telling you that he always thinks about you, and now you’re done with him?
He texts you again: why are u acting like this
Thank fuck you respond.
You: i guess the slut got bored of you first
His body goes cold. He knows you’re referring to what one of his friends said. You heard that?
If that’s why you’re so pissed off, he needs to talk to you about it in person. He grabs his car keys and rushes out of the house.
Rafe is pounding on your door for so long that his hand is starting to hurt almost as much as it did when he threw those punches last night.
He feels himself teetering on the edge, getting close to the manic state he knows and hates.
He pulls his phone out to text you: open the door
You: ??? i’m not home
At this point, he sees red. He could break his damn phone if he didn’t need it right now. He calls you again, his jaw clenched so tight that it hurts.
His stomach tightens when the dial tone stops after two rings.
“Am I gonna have to block your number?” you say when you answer. The sound of a crowd and loud music buzzes in the background. He clues in that you’re at a party.
“Where are you?” he asks, head hanging, staring at the hallway floor.
“That’s none of your business.” He can hear a slur in your words.
“Are you drunk?”
“I can drink if I want to. I know you love to think you own me, but you don’t.”
Rafe swallows hard, shaking his head, squeezing his eyes shut. He heard your voice shake. Fuck. You’re crying and it’s his fault.
“Where are you?” Rafe repeats. “Let’s - we need to…” He’s stammering, anxious and unbalanced. “We need to talk… I swear, I’ll fucking wait here until you come home if you don’t tell me where you are.”
Your back is against a wall, the phone pressed to your ear. The room is loud and humid from all the bodies crammed together into one house.
You hate that you’re crying over him and you hate that he can hear it. As if his ego needs the boost.
“Why?” you finally ask, voice strained, hoping he’ll tell you what you want to hear. That there’s a part of him that cares about you.
Rafe is silent for a moment.
“Which one is it?” His chest is tight. He can’t say it now. Not over the phone.
“Neither,” you reply, then hang up. You know he’s just horny and possessive and mad. And definitely bluffing.
You shouldn’t, you know you shouldn’t, but you take another shot. Time melts away from you as you get lost in the music with your friend, determined to get Rafe and his drama off of your mind.
It’s half past one in the morning when you order a cab. The alcohol has almost worn off at this point. Someone spilled a drink on you and you just want to take a shower and sleep. You have to promise yourself that you won’t give into the impulse to wear Rafe’s shirt to bed.
You exit the elevator and your heart stops when you see Rafe sitting on the floor, his back against your door, his knee raised, his head slumped.
He meant it. He waited. For over three fucking hours.
When you get close enough for him to hear your footsteps, Rafe clambers up to stand, towering over you. His eyes sweep over your face, the blue in them even more prominent in contrast to the dark bruise over his right eye.
Even though your heart, the traitor, is thumping with desire, the ache of what he did to you is louder. It was barbaric, what he said about you. What he let his friend say about you.
“Why are you still here?” you say as evenly as you can.
“You can’t…” Rafe shakes his head, frustrated. He immediately notices you’re not wearing the necklace he gave you and his chest aches. “You can’t end this.”
“Watch me,” you say with a scoff, nudging past him. You feel him behind you, hear his shallow breaths. You unlock your door and pull out your keys.
He won’t move. You turn to look at him again, feeling your lips thin in aggravation.
“Rafe,” you state. “Please. I just want to shower and sleep. Go home.”
“No,” he says stubbornly.
“Why can’t you just go find another girl to fuck around with?” you say, raising your tone.
He almost feels nauseous hearing you say that.
“Are you worried you won’t find one who does everything like I do?” you ask. “I just can’t say no, right? That’s what you told your friends.”
Rafe looks down in shame, nostrils flaring. His lips screw up in anger. He has no words to offer.
“Go home,” you repeat. You’re sure he’s just upset about losing his favorite booty call, just so not accustomed to not getting what he wants.
Rafe doesn’t budge. You’re sober enough to know you can’t continue this conversation in the hallway and risk your voices carrying into your neighbors’ homes.
Frustrated and embittered, you turn your doorknob and accept the fact that he’s not leaving without a fight.
You turn on the dim overhead light and stand in your tiny kitchen, facing Rafe with your arms crossed, as the door shuts behind him.
He steps towards you, hands sliding up your arms before he leans down to try to kiss you.
“Stop,” you mutter, shoving him off, pushing him away.
He tries again, putting his palms on your cheeks.
“No,” you snap, driving him away harder.
Rafe feels hollow. Lost. He’s fine with showing anger. It’s second nature to him. But this? This tangled feeling of yearning feels impossible to verbally express to you.
“Why?” is all he can sputter.
“I’m not letting you use me anymore,” you say through gritted teeth.
Rafe had no idea you’d react like this over the moronic shit he and his friend said. He thought you were fine with how things were. That you were detached.
Despite the rage and anxiety consuming him, the fact that you’re this angry over this ridiculous idea that you’re not a person to him, that you maybe want to be more, makes hope bloom in his heart.
“It’s not like that,” Rafe says.
“It is,” you argue. “I’m done acting like I’m okay with it. I could handle it at the beginning, but…”
You sigh. You can’t give him the satisfaction of telling him you have feelings for him. You start to get choked up again, though, your body betraying you. You can’t hide what he does to you from him anymore.
“I’m done,” you say resolutely. This man is nothing but trouble. “My contact picture in your phone is a fucking nude. I’m just body parts to you and I respect myself too much to keep this going. Just leave. You won’t change my mind.”
“I can’t… I can’t not see you anymore,” he grovels.
“You’re just mad you won’t be able to brag to your buddies about what I let you do to me.”
“No.” Rafe brings the heels of his hands up to his eyes, looking so damn flustered. “I’m not mad about that. I… Fuck, it’s…”
“What about when he called me a slut to run through? You laughed. After he said something so fucking horrible about me-”
“Wait,” he snaps, tone rising. “Just wait. Let me talk.”
“Then talk,” you say sharply, shocked by his audacity to be the angry one here.
He takes a deep breath.
“When he called you that, I…” Rafe rakes his hand through his hair. “It’s how we always talk and I - I know that’s a shitty excuse, but I didn’t have the balls to tell him to shut the fuck up. And then last night…”
He vaguely gestures to his black eye. His mind replays the rage he felt when he heard the vulgar words used to describe you. The way his fist met his friend’s jaw. Rafe walked away with a swollen eye, but it was nothing compared to what he had inflicted.
“He said something about you and I beat the shit out of him like I should’ve the first time.”
“What’d he say?” you ask after a beat.
“It doesn’t matter.”
So, that’s what happened to him last night. You’re almost touched to hear he defended your honor, but the memory of the text you saw on his phone darkens your mood instantly, reminding you of how dispensable and cheap it made you feel.
“This the same friend who texted you about all the bitches at that party?” you say bitterly.
Rafe meets your gaze.
“You saw that?”
“Yeah,” you say. Rafe realizes that was the reason for your abrupt coldness. You were jealous. He hates that he hurt you, but admittedly, the feeling of you being envious over him is so fucking gratifying.
He sighs your name. He didn’t even glance at another girl last night. Why would he? “For fuck’s sake, I texted you all night. I told you I’m always thinking about you.”
“Rafe, you texted me about how all you want to do is hook up with me.”
“That’s not… that’s not all I want,” he sighs, defeated. How can he explain that the way he touches you is how he tells you what he’s feeling? He’s so fucking bad at talking about it.
“Then why did you talk about me like that?” you ask.
“I was…” Rafe begins. He swallows hard, his eyes refusing to meet yours now. “I know I shouldn’t have said that shit but-”
“You’re only saying this now ‘cause you got caught.”
“No, it’s - it’s more than that. I-”
“You were just being honest,” you say with a shrug. “I did everything you told me to and you wanted to brag.”
“Yeah- I mean, no…” he stammers. Your use of the past-tense is so damn hurtful, the implication that you really are through with him, and before he can think to hide it, tears start to gloss his eyes. “Just listen-”
“If I’m just an easy fuck to you, then that’s fine, just own up to it.”
“Let me talk!” he finally shouts. Rafe’s head is spinning. He’s angry and anxious and close to losing his mind.
You don’t even cower, not letting him get to you. But when you realize he’s crying, too, your blood runs cold.
“Goddamn it.” He frantically brings his hands up to his head, fingers on his temples. “I’m trying to tell you that I didn’t know how to- I don’t know how to talk about this fucking feeling you give me.”
“Try,” you say.
Rafe’s breath is shaky, blinking fast as he gazes at you.
“This is more than sex. I’m fucking… I’m falling for you,” he finally admits.
No words come to your mind. The air between you is thick. Your heart is pounding in your ears. Your stomach is numb.
Rafe lowers his gaze, his chest rising and falling rapidly. He’s worked himself up in such a panic.
He doesn’t know how or when you cracked into this side of him that he didn’t even know existed, but you did. And you’re not leaving.
“Are you serious?” you ask quietly through a shallow exhale.
“Do I need to beg you to believe me?” he says.
“Yeah,” you say with a sarcastic huff, pushing him to see where his limit is. To see if he’s being honest.
You can’t believe what you’re seeing when Rafe sinks down onto the floor in front of you, his knees on your cheap linoleum. He takes your hand in his, pulling it to his warm mouth, soft lips kissing your palm.
He realizes he would rather lose all of his pride than lose you.
“Rafe,” you say, the edge to your tone completely gone now.
The shift in your dynamic is harrowing. He’s always the one in control, the one with the upper hand. Now he’s on his fucking knees for you.
“I’m sorry,” he says, eyes locked on yours. “I’m so fucking sorry I said that shit. I’ll never do it again. You’re not just an easy…”
He can’t even say it.
“You’re so much more,” he says. There’s hopelessness in his gaze. You’re rattled with shock, your heart feeling like it’s burning in your chest.
You can’t believe it. You can’t fathom that he likes you more than just from the waist down.
“What if I stopped hooking up with you?” you challenge. “I keep seeing you but it’s nothing physical. What then?“
“That’s okay,” he says, without hesitation.
“I mean no sex,” you say. “At all.”
“Fine.”
You pout at him in endearment as relief pools through you.
Rafe is racked with the deepest form of desperation. He can’t picture a day without you. Without your smile, your humor, your voice, your smell. He fell off the deep end and there’s no fucking saving him.
Your stare is puncturing him. He’s sure he fucked up too massively to earn any sort of chance with you ever again.
But when you finally lean down to press your lips onto his, euphoria rushes through his entire being. He frantically scrambles to stand, feeling his face contort with disbelief and gratefulness and a yearning so hard that it hurts.
Rafe’s kisses are deep but fast, his big hands cradling your head, thumbs rubbing over your cheekbones.
You pull back, looking up at him with a tiny shred of remaining suspicion that he’s not being genuine.
“Let me stay the night,” he says, voice low, lids heavy. You’re unsure that he really means he’d be with you even without the sex.
You only look at him.
“I won’t try anything,” he adds. He knows you needed the reassurance. You stare at him with wide, vulnerable eyes, resting your hands on his firm, heaving chest.
“Shower with me,” you tell him, restless to wash the night off of you. “And prove it.”
Rafe nods, your face still in his hands. Fuck, he feels like you have him wrapped around your finger. He’d do anything to keep you in his life.
“Let me do the work,” he says.
You step back, heart racing, and raise your hands over your head. His fingers quickly find the edge of your top, slowly lifting it and pulling it off of you. Your jeans are next, the denim sliding down your legs.
Rafe presses against you, leading you backwards into your bathroom. His lips press against your forehead as he unhooks your bra and lets it fall to the floor.
He’s on his knees again as he peels your underwear off. You watch his eyes trail up your bare body. He can’t hide the lust in his stare, no matter how hard he tries.
As you turn on the shower, you hear the rustle of him taking his clothes off. When you step into the tub, you feel his body against your back. Big hands skim up your arms as you turn the faucet, prompting hot water to rain down on both of you.
Rafe can’t stop himself from asking.
“Did you talk to any guys at that party?” His voice echoes against the porcelain, loud even over the sound of the shower.
You smile to yourself.
“How am I gonna focus on another guy when you’re texting me so damn much?”
“Princess,” he huffs. You laugh and turn in his arms to rest your hands on his shoulders.
“No,” you tell him. “I didn’t want to.”
Rafe smirks and leans down, but stops an inch away from your lips.
“Am I allowed to kiss you?” he asks.
“Hmm… fine,” you tease. “But that’s the farthest you can go.” He captures your lips in his, his mouth warm. You feel him grow against you and you pull away to look down, his cock already almost fully hard.
“Okay, I can’t control that,” he says. You meet his eyes and share the first laugh that you’ve had together tonight.
You pick up your body wash and hand it to him. It’ll drive him crazy to touch you like this and not be able to do anything about it.
“You get my body,” you say, admittedly excited to tempt him. “And I’ll do my hair.”
Rafe’s forehead crinkles in concentration as he squeezes the body wash into his palm. Your eyes are on him as he lathers the gel over your shoulders first.
“You’re cute when you’re focused,” you giggle, starting to massage your shampoo into your hair.
The sound of your laugh, the aroma in the air is so fucking nice to him. It’s so you.
His palms move up and down your arms in gentle circles. Rafe’s groin is getting tighter by the second and the fact that he won’t get any relief for it is agony. But he needs to prove himself to you.
“You ignoring my tits on purpose?” you ask.
Rafe cocks his head in mild irritation. Touching you there will only make him harder. You exhale in pleasure once his hands rest on your breasts, gently kneading.
“You can’t make those sounds,” he says, voice strained.
“I can do whatever I want,” you reply. His hands dip below the curves of your tits. You purposely moan louder than you normally would just to torment him.
His jaw tightens as he collects more of your body wash to smooth down your stomach. His hands slide over your hips, the water and soap making your skin extra slippery, and he lands on your ass.
“Massage me a bit there,” you tell him. He huffs an aggravated chuckle, then starts to rub into your flesh.
The crook of Rafe’s neck is at your chin as he leans to massage you and you plant a gentle kiss on his wet skin. The gesture makes his stomach twist with adoration.
“Okay, that’s enough,” he mumbles, running his hands up your back. You can feel him against your leg; he’s fully erect and pining for you to touch him.
“My ass is still sore,” you groan, continuing to lather the shampoo onto your hair. “You were so rough on me in front the mirror, remember?”
The memory of fucking you on the floor in his room makes his arousal skyrocket even higher. He exhales and smooths his hands over your ass again.
You tilt your head to the side as you moan. You feel Rafe’s mouth press against your exposed neck, then he grunts against your skin and moves away abruptly.
“Getting frustrated?” you whisper.
“No,” he lies.
The hot water continues to ebb down your body as Rafe squeezes your ass.
“You can get my legs now,” you mumble. He’s half-relieved, half-frustrated to have to move his hands.
Rafe rubs in circles over your thighs, his breath heavy.
“Get on your knees so you can reach everything,” you say as you wash out the shampoo from your hair. You’re testing him, ordering him around like he usually does to you, seeing if he’ll crack.
When he kneels down, you hike your leg up onto the tub, your middle inches away from his face.
“Fuck,” he breathes, wishing he could just taste you. His hands are sliding down your calves as he gawks at the beauty between your legs, knowing you’re purposely tempting him.
His eyes trail up to your face. He looks ravenous for you.
Falling for you. He said he was falling for you.
“What?” you say with a smile. Rafe only shakes his head, continuing to run his hands over your legs.
“I said kissing is allowed,” you say, revelling in this feeling of control over him.
He doesn’t waste a second. His lips are against your pussy immediately, kissing you over and over. If you tried to keep count of how many kisses he was planting on you, you’d fail in seconds.
Arousal twists deep inside you, wanting him so badly, but loving the game you’re playing.
His lips wrap around your clit and he starts to suck, prompting you push your fingers through his hair, damp from the shower, and tug to pull him off of you.
“Kisses only,” you say. “Unless you didn’t mean what you said?”
“I did,” he huffs. He roughly shoves your wrist away to get close to you again, lips puckered. You feel his fingers ghost over your inner thighs, then pull apart your lips.
“Can I spread you open, baby?” he asks.
“No,” you respond.
“Please,” he begs.
“Kisses. Only.”
He groans. You laugh.
“You got me so turned on,” you moan. “I need to just…”
You slip your fingers between his mouth and your clit, denying him any more access.
Rafe thinks this could be thing to that finally makes him lose his fucking mind. But he stays still, knees aching from the hard tub, as you play with yourself right in front of him.
“That feels so nice,” you whisper, your knees weak. You put your other hand against the shower wall, looking down at him.
“Hold me up,” you order. He grips your hips and watches you moan and writhe over him, dipping your head back.
You dip a finger inside of you, tightening and sighing.
“Fuck.” He literally whimpers the word.
“God, there’s so many things I can think about while I touch myself,” you moan. “Like when we fucked in your car? Or when I squirted on you?”
“Which time?” he mutters, trying to have any sort of power right now by reminding you of what he can do to you.
“Aw,” you coo. “Is this like when I’m on camera? You can watch but you can’t touch me?”
“Shit,” Rafe breathes. You moan, the water dripping off of you.
He has to look away at this point. His cock is so hard that it hurts. His eyes go low, seeing a bead of precum on his swollen tip. He tries to comfort himself by thinking about how he can jerk off later.
“Get up,” you say. He brings himself up on his feet, towering over you again.
You turn your back to him again and start to rub your scalp to make sure you washed all the shampoo out.
“You’re probably cold on that side, hmm?” you ask.
Rafe’s temperature is the least of his concerns.
“I’ll keep you warm,” you tell him, looking over your shoulder. You run your hands down your body and pause over your ass, spreading yourself open.
“Put your cock right here,” you tell him.
“I- I can’t,” he moans.
“You can,” you encourage.
He kneels to place himself right where you want him. You let go, your asscheeks hugging him, feeling his length pressed up against you.
“Fuck,” he whispers, twitching against you. “This is… fuck…”
“If you didn’t mean that you can be with me without the sex, just say so.”
“I meant it,” he says. “But this is torture. I need to go. I’ll wait for you in your room, okay?”
“You can’t keep it together for me?” you tease. “I thought you liked me.”
“I fucking love you,” Rafe groans, making your heart flutter.
You’re done playing this game. You need him now.
You turn to face him, pulling him down with your hands cupping his neck to kiss him. He’s biting your bottom lip, kissing you hard.
“We don’t have to do this,” he whispers breathlessly.
“I want to,” you say against his lips, wrapping your hand around his cock. “What do you want?” He bucks up against you, groaning.
“I wanna fuck you,” he pleads.
“Then fuck me.”
Rafe’s rough and fast as he hitches your leg up, pushing you to lean against the shower wall. He lines himself up at your cunt, stretching you so much nicer than your fingers ever could.
He keeps his eyes on you when he thrusts into you, his expression both needy and satisfied.
“Thank you,” he whispers. The feeling of him thanking you for letting him be inside you hits you like a drug.
Rafe is in heaven. You squeeze him so fucking good as he rocks in and out of you. He needs to make you cum before he does. You deserve it. You deserve all the pleasure in the world.
When he starts to rub his thumb over your clit, you’re trembling with bliss. Everything in this moment feels so damn good.
“You’re my girl,” he mumbles, his usual possessive side back now. “Say it.”
“I’m your girl,” you respond. “Fuck… I love you.”
Rafe is sure he has never felt happier in his life. His thrusts get harder and faster, and with the pressure on your clit and the hot water coating your body, you whine through your orgasm.
To him, it’s a gift watching you reach your peak. You clench around him in rhythmic flutters and he can’t hold back anymore, his cum gushing out of him so fucking hard that he sees stars.
This is the best sex he’s ever had. Because now he knows it’s more than just something physical for both of you.
He kisses you hard as his body trembles, pumping into you. His forehead is against yours as you pant together and even though he’s exhausted, he stays inside you as long as he can manage.
When he pulls out, he brings his hands to your cheeks and kisses you again.
“You meant that?” he asks. He needs to know you that really do love him. That it wasn’t a heat of the moment thing. You look up at him, his lips parted, the water dripping down his face.
“Yes,” you say. His dimples are deep in his cheeks as he smiles at you.
As Rafe helps you clean up, he’s pissed at himself that he never did this before. He hates that you had to always do this alone. He won’t ever let that happen again.
Once you’re both lying in your bed, your bedroom dark save for a streetlamp casting a dull light through the window, Rafe holds you tight.
Your cheek is against his shoulder as he surrounds you in his arms. You both remained naked and the feeling of your bare bodies pressed together like this is perfection.
You softly trace your finger over the bruise covering his eye. The one his friend left on him because of something he said about you.
“What’d he say?” you ask.
“I’m not repeating it,” Rafe replies.
“Please?” you ask. “I wanna know what made you go crazy.”
“He said I seem happier lately,” Rafe says. “And before I told him it was because I wanna… be with you for real, he said… he wants to see if he could get…”
“God,” you mutter, rolling your eyes. He doesn’t have to say any more. His buddy wanted a turn with you.
“But hey, I’m not gonna let anyone say anything like that about you, okay?” he promises. “I’ll beat the shit out of anyone who tries to.”
You picture being out in public with Rafe, his arm around you. And you can’t help but ask. You need to know.
“So… are you gonna… want me around your friends and stuff?” you ask.
“Of course,” he tells you, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You’re my girl, right?”
It’s jarring. You’re not a lower-class maid to him. Not his personal whore. Not his slutty sugar baby. You’re a woman he loves.
Legs tangled, you fall asleep together, and you adore that the worry of falling for him is now gone. Because you’re in love, and so is he, and now you can enjoy him without telling yourself you can’t.
When you wake up the next morning, you shuffle in your position to find him, but you’re alone.
Your heart drops. Could he have been faking…?
You can’t jump to that conclusion. You’re about to check your phone when you hear crinkling coming from the kitchen.
You put on underwear and the shirt you stole from him a while ago before padding into the kitchen. He’s standing over your table, removing containers from bags.
You realize it’s from your favorite nearby bistro. He ordered food for you.
“Breakfast?” you ask. Rafe looks up at you and he doesn’t understand how every time he sees you, you strike him with how adorable you are.
“You hungry?” he says.
You settle across from him at the table. You realize he must have referenced the screenshot you sent him after the first night that he stayed over, when he sent you money to order breakfast and you sent him proof of what you bought.
As you dig into your food, you gaze at him. Blue eyes meet yours. He smirks. It doesn’t feel real. He used to look so out of place in your apartment, but this feels so natural.
“We gonna talk about how much of a cuddler you are?” you tease.
“Shut up,” he laughs. “Eat your food.”
You laugh and continue to chew.
“What do you have to do today?” he asks.
“I should study,” you say. “I was going to last night after work, but you know…”
Rafe looks down and his Adam’s apple bobs with his hard swallow.
“Are you gonna keep working?” he asks. “I don’t want you to. I wanna take care of you.”
As much as he loves seeing you around his house twice a week, he’s been getting more and more uncomfortable with the idea of you having to work so hard, having to clean up after him.
“Yeah,” you finally say. “I think I need to have the independence. To know I’m working for my own money. Does that make sense?”
“With your attitude? Yeah,” he says. You laugh.
You hope the gossip between your coworkers doesn’t get any farther up the chain. For now, you want to keep your job and the steadiness it promises.
“You can’t pull me away from my work to hook up whenever you want, though, okay?” you say.
“Even when I find you in my bed?” he asks.
“That was one time,” you scoff.
Rafe leans over to place his phone in front of you. He has your contact info up. The photo isn’t what it was before, though. It’s a photo of you sleeping, cheek pressed on his chest.
He must have taken it this morning. He wants to prove you’re not just a body to him.
Your eyes study his screen and you smile, oblivious to the fact that he’s staring at you.
But then again, you never really noticed how much he looked at you whenever you came to work at the house.
He can still remember the rush he felt when he randomly found you on that damn website. You were a fucking fantasy to him, a dream that he never thought he’d get to live out.
But here you are and by some crazy stroke of luck, you found something in him worth loving.
Rafe always enjoyed having some sort of ownership over you, claiming you as his. Because deep down, he always kind of knew he belonged to you. Whether you want him or not, he’s yours.
(the end) (continuation blurbs)
author’s note: THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT FOR THIS SERIES 💘 it’s so bittersweet ending it. i had so much fun writing this and it’s because of your comments and messages 😭 i’ll be writing more fics! if you want updates, please follow @xorafe-library and turn on notifications since i’ll be reblogging my work there. love you all!!!
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beomiracles · 1 month
Text
⌞ 𝐀 𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐘'𝐒 𝐁𝐎𝐘 ⌝
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DREAM RECALL “You know what I think of you?” He says, the bed squeaking as he leans forward, dangerously close. “I think you’re scared.” He drawls, eyes boring into your own with such vigor that you almost felt pity for the anger that consumed him. How miserable he must be to live like that. — “I’m not scared.” You calmly state, shifting against the pillows as you instinctively try to create distance between the two of you. Quickly taking note of your hesitant body language, he smirks, “no? Then prove it.”
“Prove that you’re not afraid of the darkness, of my darkness.”
wc -> 17k (oopsie daises)
pairings stepbrother!beomgyu x stepsister!reader warnings stepcest, daddy issues, some mommy issues, character death, emo/punk!beomgyu + he has an eyebrow piercing, major asshole!beomgyu, mentions of alcoholism, lots of arguing, angsty as shit but with a happy ending, talks of grief and letting go, smut (again, stepcest), virgin!reader, loss of virginity, softdom!gyu but he's also a menace, guilt ridden sex, unprotected + pullout, handjob + vaginal fingering, some cum eating, use of "sis" both outside and during the smut (I cannot stress this enough), might be teetering on the edge of dubious consent at some points but nothing crazy. dead dove do not eat
#serene adds ✎ I have no clue of how this happened lol. PLEASE read every single warning I am begging you. don't read this if as much as one single tag made you waver. ⎯ aside from like the fact that it's stepcest, I fucking love this whole fic. I'm so proud of it and I would actually cry if someone (who got through it) would be up to share some thoughts :>
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“There’s still time to turn back..” You mutter as you lean against the leather of the passenger seat. Listening to the bustling engine slowly dying out as the car comes to a stop. “Come on princess, don’t be like that.” Your dad sighs as he retrieves the key, turning it between his fingers. “You knew that this move was coming and-“ — “Yeah, I did. But not this soon, not now.” You argue, folding your arms across your chest in defiance. “You could’ve at least waited until I was out of college, until I had gotten my own place.” 
More than anything you wished to be able to change your father’s mind, to turn things back to how they were before he met Ms Choi. But that was of course impossible, and now you were paying the price for not getting a room on campus. “But look on the bright side, it’s a mere fifteen minute drive to school, and Beomgyu has his license, I’m sure he could take you someday.” Your dad tries, a small smile on his face. — You grimaced at the name, your chest churning in disgust at the mere thought of sharing a car with that thing. 
A tap to your window makes you turn your head in its direction. There stood Ms Choi, she sends you a small wave and before you know it, your father had climbed out of the vehicle, leaving you to sulk. Their voices are muffled through the thick glass but you can see them enveloping each other in a tender hug, your dad leaning in to press a kiss to her cheek. With a small grimace your gaze flickers to the small bracelet around your wrist, its fine silver glinting in the sun and your chest contracts slightly. You supposed you should feel happy for him, it had been a long time since you’d last seen your father so at ease, so in love.  
And it wasn’t like you didn’t like his new girlfriend, no you were quite fond of Ms Choi. She was nice, often bringing freshly baked cookies whenever she came over, remembering your favorite foods as she made them when you visited. Most importantly she made your dad feel things he hadn’t felt since the passing of your mother. — You just couldn’t understand how such a sweet woman had managed to raise such a being of a son. 
Beomgyu was far from anything his mother represented. He was loud, obnoxiously so, his foul mouth going off every other second, spewing his hatred for the world and the people in it. Beomgyu listened to deranged music, the kind that made your ears bleed. He blamed his father for all his problems, not to mention taking his pent up anger out on his sweet mom. — The black charcoal around his eyes represented that of the rotting darkness slowly eating away at his soul, and you wondered if Beomgyu had always been angry. Perhaps he came out like that, you were almost certain that he was a menace even as a small baby. 
You had been to Ms Choi’s house a handful of times. It was a small two story flat, neatly decorated in light and inviting shades and smelled of roses. Had it not been for the first room to the right on the second floor, you would’ve probably loved it there. — The small hallway is familiar as you stumble inside, a heavy suitcase clutched tightly in your grasp. “Oh dear, let me help you with that”, Ms Choi fusses as she reaches for your bag but you merely shake your head, “I’m fine miss, don’t worry”, you assure her. 
She turns to your dad who was carrying at least twice your baggage as he walked up the dainty pathway leading to the house. “Beomgyu ought to come down and be of some assistance”, she murmurs as she throws a glance over her shoulder, her eyes traveling up the staircase by the end of the hall. — “I’m sure we’ll be fine!” You quickly chirp, dreading the thought of having to deal with him so soon. But there was no changing Ms Choi’s mind as she immediately calls out for her nuisance of a son. 
You swallow thickly as an eerie silence follows, your dads girlfriend huffs out a short breath as she fiddles with the jewelry around her neck. “Beomgyu! Come down here!” The nervous edge to her voice was palpable and part of you took pity on the sweet lady for being stuck with such a being in her house, no less as her biological child. 
Soon the floorboards above you creak, the old house immediately giving away the presence of someone else on the top floor. You tried tearing your gaze from the stairs, but it seemed impossible as Beomgyu’s figure emerged. His step is heavy as he drags his feet across the floor, his hair had grown longer since last you’d seen him, and that was over four months ago. You often did your best in avoiding him, thus leading the two of you to meeting less than a dozen times during the two years in which your parents had been pursuing one another. Well to hell with that plan now, you thought. 
“Hi darling, why don’t you say hi to-” — “I know who she is.” He cuts her off, sparing you a mere side glance before his gaze shifts to your dad struggling with the suitcases, a look of distaste on his face. “A-Alright”, Ms Choi clears her throat as she motions toward your father, “why don’t you help bring their stuff inside.” She receives only a small huff from her son as Beomgyu pushes past the two of you to venture outside. You don’t miss the flicker of disappointment on his mother’s face. No matter what he did, she would always cherish and protect him. You couldn’t understand why. — She turns to you with an apologetic smile, “your room is down the hall to the right.” 
The stairs felt eternal as you pulled your suitcase up, intent on not needing any extra hands. And when you finally reach flat ground, you heave a sigh. Though the comforting peace was short-lived as the thumping beat of a heavy bass filled your eardrums, the sound overpowering that of the wheels on your suitcase as you rolled it along the wooden floor. With a frown you near the first door, it was slightly ajar, allowing for the ear piercing music to float out into the small corridor. Already familiar with the layout of the house, you recognized the room as Beomgyu’s, and as the owner in question was currently downstairs, you dared a small peek. 
You can’t remember actually being inside his room, merely passing it in search for the bathroom as the first floor lacked one. And it was unlike anything the rest of the house represented. It was messy and crammed. The once cream white walls were covered in a variety of posters portraying his favorite bands, one of which you guessed to currently be playing through the large speakers by his desk. — His bed looked as if it hadn’t been made in weeks, possibly months and he seemed to be making good use of his floor as an alternate wardrobe. His computer was on as well, the bright light of the screen catching your attention in the otherwise dim room as the curtains drawn prevented much sunlight from reaching through. 
Upon closer inspection your eyes widen as you realize what kind of video was playing. The almost naked woman in the footage emits a pornographic moan and your jaw slacks as you take a couple of steps back in complete disbelief. — The room was like a tainted mark left on an otherwise clean canvas. The black lungs of a smoker, rotten and decaying. The only flaw in an otherwise picture perfect home, and you would’ve probably pitied the poor soul living here had it not been Choi Beomgyu. 
“What the fuck are you doing?” 
The raspy voice sends a shiver down your spine as you twist on the spot, coming face to face with the inhabitant of the room you’d invaded. Beomgyu lingers in the doorway, your discarded suitcase lazily kicked to the side as his brows furrow, the glinting metal on one of them catching your eye, had he always had that piercing? — You gulp, fists clenching before relaxing again. 
“I uh…I was.. I was looking for my room..” The excuse was petty, and you knew he could tell by the way his lips pulled into a small grimace. “Well this certainly isn’t it.” He spits, taking a charging step forward and you feel yourself immediately faltering back against his desk. — “Out.” He grits, and you could’ve sworn you heard the way his teeth ground together as his jaw flexed.
Not having to be told twice, you quickly slip out of the room, the door being slammed shut on your ass in a mere second. “What a dick”, you mutter, though you supposed it was somewhat deserved as you went in his room without permission. — Your own bedroom, on the other hand, matched the rest of the house. It was small, barely fitting your bed and a study desk, but the window gazing out over the front yard was remarkable. Your fingers graze along the lace curtains as you think of the multiple ways in which you’d be able to decorate the tiny space. Perhaps living here could become somewhat bearable, you thought. 
⸝⸝
No. You quickly found that it would become most unbearable to thrive under this roof. Dinner was awkward. As awkward as it could possibly get. The air was dense, laying on top of your table like a thick blanket, enveloping your party of four in a stale silence. The sounds of silverware scraping against porcelain plates fill the dainty dining room. Every bite felt like a piece of rock sliding down your throat and no matter how hard you trained your gaze to the cut piece of meat in front of you, Beomgyu’s eyes felt like daggers on your skin. Was he still mad about earlier? 
“So, Beomgyu, I hear you’re about to start your senior year as well.” Your father clears his throat, turning to the younger male with a small smile. Beomgyu’s gaze finally shifts away from your near sweating figure and over to your dad as he sends him an almost unnoticeable nod. The statement made your eyebrows raise in surprise, he was a year older than you, shouldn’t he have graduated before summer? — Beomgyu answers your unspoken question in a bored sigh, “failed my last year.” 
“Oh but he’s worked hard to be able to retake his classes this upcoming semester!” His mother suddenly butts in as she places a hand on top of your father’s. You watch their small exchange before your eyes flit over to Beomgyu who looked almost disgusted at the close proximity your parents held. Of course he would be against it, you wondered if there was anything that didn’t make his nose scrunch up in disdain. 
“Then perhaps the two of you can study together?” Ms Choi suddenly exclaims as she looks to you with an expression best described as hopeful. “Your father tells me you do well in school.” — “Of course, my princess is in the top of her class”, your dad boasts as he flashes you a small grin. You sheepishly nod, cheeks reddening at the sudden attention directed your way. “Why, isn’t that an amazing idea, Beom?” His mother cheers to which her son grimaces, “wonderful.” 
You didn’t like Beomgyu. And you thought you had every reason not to. You had never met someone so completely disregarding of other people’s feelings. Someone so selfish and arrogant, someone who took so much for granted. Like his mom. — You supposed you envied him a little. Ms Choi was such a wonderful person, not to mention an amazing mother. You often found yourself reminiscing of what you’d lost when in her presence. But Beomgyu seemed to hold little affection for something you longed so desperately to have. — You remember the evening clearly, the first night you met, two years ago. 
Dinner was awkward even back then. 
You’re sat gathered around the very same table, in the very same seats. Back then you had a small crush on him, on Beomgyu. How could you not? He was everything you weren’t, everything you thought you wanted to be. The expressive t-shirt he wore, a band you didn’t recognize, but you guessed it to be some type of rock. His slightly baggy jeans, decorated with a few simple chains. Dark hair, though it was shorter back then, and of course, the liner around his eyes. It was impossible not to be drawn to him. But he didn’t look at you, not once. 
You helped your dad clear the table whilst Beomgyu accompanied his mom in the kitchen as she prepared dessert. “What do you think of her?” Your father asks with a hopeful smile. You knew that he was nervous about introducing someone new to you, and Ms Choi would be the first woman he’d seen since your mother’s passing. You weren’t oblivious to the fact that your approval weighed like a ton of bricks on your dads shoulders, and you didn’t want to let him down. 
“She seems sweet.” 
He sighs, a relieved sigh. “Do you like her?” You ask, unable to hide the small frown on your face. Your father remains silent for a moment, his hands busying themselves with stacking the plates on top of one another. “I do”, he nods, his face immediately lighting up as he sees your small smile. But before you get another word out, the voice of Ms Choi pierces the quaint house. 
Neither of you move, but the conversation between Beomgyu and his mother was no longer private. “Well if that’s how you really feel, then perhaps you’ll find your father’s place a more suitable living space.” Ms Choi exclaims, her voice is thick, as if on the verge of breaking at any given moment. A brief silence follows her words, and you hold your breath.
“That piece of shit lowlife?” Beomgyu suddenly seethes and his mom quickly interrupts him. “Don’t call him that.” She sounds almost pleading. — Her son chuckles and if you had been able to see him, you would guess that he was shaking his head. “You still let him get away with all the shit he’s done?” — “Oh come on, you know it’s not like that, Beom..” 
“He’s an asshole, mom.” Beomgyu finally states, his voice holds no resentment, in fact it barely holds any emotion at all. “And you, you’re both naive and stupid for thinking he’s anything else.” — Then he re-emerges from the kitchen, not sparing either you or your father as much as a second glance as he heads for the front door, it slams shut behind him, leaving the faint sobs of Ms Choi to echo through the small house. 
Your dad rushes to the kitchen, but you remain frozen in place. His small whispers of reassurance carry out into the dining room as he tries to comfort the crying mess that was his girlfriend. Your eyes flit between the small opening to the kitchen and the hallway; feeling more than conflicted as you gnaw on your bottom lip.
After a few moments of hesitation, you finally come to a decision as you tear yourself from your spot by the since long vacant table. Quietly, you retrace Beomgyu’s last steps and you, too, push the heavy door open. — The cold night air hits your bare arms making you wrap them around yourself as you begin walking down the gravel pathway. You really had no idea of where he might’ve gone, or how you were even supposed to find him. But as you push the squeaking fence gate open, you know that you won’t have to look far. 
Perched on the sidewalk, knees tucked to his chest, Beomgyu leans his chin on top of his folded arms. Drawing in a small breath, you muster up the courage to do what you had come out here for. — He doesn’t say anything as you take a seat beside him, mimicking his actions by pulling your knees to your chest as you wrap your arms around them. You weren’t exactly good at comforting people, but you knew what sadness felt like, it was all you had been able to feel for three months after your mother’s death. 
“You here to fuckin’ lecture me too?” He spits, his gaze is fixed on the asphalt road in front of him. Perhaps Beomgyu’s sadness was different from yours. You shake your head, though you’re unsure if he can even see it. And for a moment, everything is silent. There was a nervous feeling bubbling within your chest, you didn’t know if it was because of your small crush on him or because of the argument you just witnessed between him and his mom. The argument sounded stupid in your ears, and it got you wondering.. 
“Why do you hate your father?” Your words ring out in the quiet night air, and somewhere to your left, you feel Beomgyu shift against the concrete sidewalk. You guess he hadn’t expected the question. — “‘Cause he’s a piece of shit.” He huffs, though his voice lacks the spite it held when in discussion with his mom. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you frown. “But he’s still your father, isn’t he?” 
Beomgyu might as well have laughed in your face. He shakes his head, one of his hands ruffling through his dark hair before he lets it fall to his side. “That changes nothing”, he states. You were tempted to disagree, it changed everything, didn’t it? To hate someone, to hate someone so close to you, someone so important.. You don’t think you could ever hate your father. 
“Have you tried talking to him?” Perhaps it was a stupid proposal, but in truth, you were at loss for ideas. Beomgyu snorts, his worn out sneakers kicking a few small rocks as he lets them roll out across the street. “You can’t talk to someone like him, and even if I could, I would have nothing to say to him.” — He draws in a sharp breath, holding it for a good moment before he slowly lets it go. “Some people..” he begins, his fingers picking at a few strands of vegetation that had managed to seep through the cracks of the constructed road. “Some people don’t deserve to have kids, some people shouldn’t have them.” 
You’re silent after that, unsure of what to say. He was right, some people were not meant to be parents. You wondered what his dad could have possibly done to warrant such hatred from his only son. It felt wrong to pry, so you didn’t. He would tell you one day, when he was ready, at least you thought so. — “But your mom is–” 
“My mom is stupid.” He spits, his expression suddenly turning sour. You didn't like how Beomgyu spoke about his mother, or how he spoke to her. “She doesn’t understand how fucked up dad is, and she still defends him despite everything he’s done.” — He bites the inside of his cheek, his brows furrowing together as his gaze remains ahead. “She’s truly pathetic.” 
Your chest churned at the statement. And perhaps your relationship with Beomgyu would’ve turned out different, had you not said your next words. But you couldn’t help it, and you didn’t regret it either. “At least you have a mother.” It angered you. It angered you that he treated people so close to him with such hatred. Did he not understand? Not everyone had the privilege of seeing their mom everyday, not everyone got to feel her warm embrace, eat her food, have her kiss your cheek. 
Beomgyu’s hatred was selfish. He was selfish. Because you would have done anything to see your mother one last time. — He turns to you, and for the first time that night, he looks at you. “And that makes you so special?” His gaze narrows down on you, the dark liner around his eyes only makes his expression look twice as gloomy. “You think you’re the only one who’s life is shit just because your mom went and died?” 
His words stung, like salt on a fresh wound, slowly being rubbed in. You fight back the tears that were prickling in the corners of your eyes. You just wanted to help. But you were obviously not very good at comforting people, still, you thought that he might’ve been at least a little understanding. How idiotic of you. Beomgyu rises to his feet, giving the gravel beneath him one final kick as it flies everywhere. 
“Don’t think you know the first thing about me just because you’ve heard me and my mom argue once.” His expression darkens even further in the pale night, and you swallow a small sob. “And don’t for a second think that we have anything in common, or that you have the right to talk to me like that.” He snaps, hands digging into the denim of his jeans, the chains on them rattling as he does. 
“It’s not my fault your mommy died, but let me give you a piece of advice yeah?” He leans down, his face inches from your own and you resist the urge to pull back, instead blinking up at him as a nasty sneer casts over his features. “Get over it.” 
With that, he straightens himself back up, letting out a small scoff as he turns on his heel before venturing down the street. — Beomgyu didn’t come back home that night, Ms Choi told you so, you didn’t know where he went, you didn’t care. From that point on, you hated Choi Beomgyu, you hated everything that was him, everything that reminded you of him. But most of all, you hated anything that made you feel like he had made you feel that night; the night he’d left you on the street to sob in your hands. 
⸝⸝
Your first official night under Ms Choi’s roof felt weird, it didn’t feel at all like home, maybe because it wasn’t, or maybe because you laid in bed with the knowledge that Beomgyu was only a room away. — It was dark, the soft glow of the moon seeping through your lace curtains. You had yet to fully unpack, your small night lamp long forgotten about in one of the boxes downstairs. The room smelled weird too, it didn’t smell like home, like mom. 
Despite it being years since she passed you often found resolve in venturing inside your parents room, the room that smelled the most of her. How you would let the tips of your fingers trail across the smooth bed sheets as you imagined her sleeping form. — The first months after her passing you even found yourself going through her old clothes, trying to keep anything that carried her scent close. But even the house itself held her presence, her laughter echoing off the walls, her soft hum as she prepared dinner, her cheerful voice as she skipped down the stairs. 
This house did not hold a single trace of your mother, she was truly gone. Your dad had moved on, he had fallen in love, he’d stopped being miserable, he no longer cried for his deceased wife in the darkest hours of night. Did that make him a bad person? You wanted to hate him for leaving your mom behind, even though she was technically the one who had left you. You wanted to tell him that he should never love a woman that wasn’t her. But you couldn’t. And you wouldn’t. — Your father was happy now. 
Perhaps Beomgyu had been right that night. Perhaps you should get over it. Perhaps you should’ve gotten over it a long time ago. But you didn’t want to, because getting over it meant letting go, letting go of your mom, and you didn’t want that. She was your mom.
Your fingers instinctively reach for the bracelet around your wrist, fiddling with the silver anxiously. This was your last piece of her, your last line, the string that still connected you to her. — You treasured it dearly yet you couldn’t but feel almost melancholic whenever you turned the jewelry around in your hands, an immense wave of sadness washing over you as the small piece kept reminding you of what you’d lost. 
You shake the tears away, sitting up as you lean against the bed frame. You wouldn’t cry tonight, you wouldn’t allow that. Instead your mind wanders down the hall, down to the room on your left. You wondered what Beomgyu was up to, was he already asleep? Maybe he was feeling restless too.. “What the fuck”, you scoff, shaking your head at the glimpse of sincerity you cast his way. Having already gone through with that mistake once, you would be sure to not make it again. Beomgyu didn’t deserve your sympathy. 
He didn’t deserve anything. 
⸝⸝
The following weeks went by in almost a blur. Your dad and you got settled in quickly, and with the help of Ms Choi, you now had a wildflower blooming by the sill of your window. Not to mention the pink rug you had so carefully picked out as you laid it in the center of your room. — But happiest was probably your father. It was sweet, seeing how giddy he got whenever the new woman in his life was around, you liked watching him fall in love. And without you even realizing it, the small house soon began to feel like home. 
Even you and Beomgyu got along fine, if getting along was what you could call it. You had silently conducted a small routine which was to be strictly followed by the two of you. It helped ensure that you wouldn’t have to run into one another more than absolutely necessary. — First, you always used the bathroom at seven. He was never up by then and you enjoyed having free access to both the shower and toilet as you took your time getting ready for the day. 
Second, your rooms were strictly prohibited areas, under no circumstances were you allowed to step foot inside his personal space, nor was he to do so in yours. That didn’t change the fact that he would continuously blast his ear screeching music so loud that the floorboards thumped in rhythm to the beat. Nor did it change the way you threw your hairbrush against the wall in an attempt to get him to shut up, not that it ever proved successful. 
Third, and perhaps the most important one; you did not know each other outside of home. Senior year in college started about two weeks ago, and within the four confined walls of the school building, you and Beomgyu were nothing but mere strangers. Not that the same couldn’t be said for the way you treated each other back at home. Which leads you on to another unspoken rule, the rule that made your parents believe that you got along just fine. 
You think it was said last rule that made everything come crumbling down one October night. 
“A whole week?” You splutter, your fork slipping from your grasp and hitting the porcelain plate in front of you. Ms Choi makes a small grimace at your blunt shock but quickly masks it with a smile, “yes, me and your father were thinking..” — “Come on princess”, your dad interrupts, leaning forward ever so slightly. “You’re more than old enough to sit the house for a week, besides, we’ve been meaning to get some alone time.” He sends you a look that practically screams, “don’t fuck this up for me, alright?” 
With a small groan you nod, “yeah it’s alright I suppose.” But it wasn’t, in fact it was far from it. This meant that you would have to spend a full seven days, locked up in the same house as Beomgyu, with no one to save you. “Is this what people call dark humor?” You mutter, though not loud enough for anyone to pick up on, at least you thought they couldn’t. Opposite you, Beomgyu’s lip twitches as his tongue prods against the inside of his cheek, his fingers playing with the rings on his hands; clearly not oblivious to your small comment. 
“I’m sure they’ll be fine”, Ms Choi adds in a most lighthearted tone. Your dad slowly nods as his gaze flits between you and Beomgyu, watching as you both turned to shoot him a small smile. 
⸝⸝
“And don’t forget to lock the door, oh and I’ve written down all the emergency numbers on a piece of paper plastered on the fridge, and there’s–” — “Dad, I’m fine.” You take his hands in yours, giving them a light squeeze and your father grins, “right, sorry princess.” He throws a quick glance over his shoulder to where Ms Choi was waiting by the car, having already shared a most quick farwell with her son. 
“Go, I’ll be okay”, you sigh as you urge him toward the door. “Alright, alright, just promise to call if anything happens.” He pleads as he ruffles your already disheveled hair due to the amount of hugs he had insisted on. You give him an affirmative nod as he steps out. “Love you, princess!” Is the last thing he gets out before you close the front door in his face, worried that you might never have him leave if you didn’t. The hallway quickly becomes enveloped in a near deafening silence, the emptiness of the house palpable. But the short-lived peace would soon be disrupted. 
“Fuck, are you fourteen or twenty?” Beomgyu jeers as he leans against the doorframe leading into the living room, arms folded across his torso. He’s dressed in a pair of loose jeans that hung low on his waist, and had it not been for the even baggier t-shirt thrown on his chest, you would’ve probably caught more than a glimpse of his stomach. The piece of jewelry on his eyebrow glints in the faint morning light as he sends you a small frown. 
It was too early for any of his snarky remarks, you thought as you swallowed a deep breath. Just ignore him, don’t bite back, that’s what he wants. But as you watch his conceding smirk practically double in size at your silence, you find yourself unable to hold back. “Well at least I talk to him.” It was a low blow, and you knew it. You didn’t care, for the way his face dropped, if only for a brief moment, made it all worth it. 
Beomgyu was quick to hide his initial surprise as he shifted against the doorframe, his dark eyes narrowing down on you. “It’s hardly like you’ve got anyone else to confide in”, he drawls, and you bite the inside of your cheek at his subtle acknowledgement of the lunches you spent alone in the school cafeteria. Your fists clench, your anger on the verge of slipping past the weakening brims of your control. 
“You think you’re so much better, huh?” Your angered huff is met by a low chuckle but before he gets a reply out, you cut him off. “I’m not the one retaking a whole year of college, I mean, I knew you were stupid, but this exceeds any of my previous assumptions.” The words slipped from your lips without you being able to stop them, and it felt good, really good. Beomgyu’s jaw visibly clenches at the insult thrown his way, the arms over his chest flexing as his body tensed. 
Feeling almost high off of the harsh remarks, you continue. “Let’s not even bring up your mom. You can barely look her in the eyes, you treat her like absolute shit, and at your grown age too.” — It’s his turn to flare up now, his previously stunned expression immediately morphing into a scowl as he charges forward. “Don’t you fucking dare talk about her in front of me.” He seethes, teeth grinding against each other as he reaches you, his fingers wrapping around the collar of your blouse as he shoves you against the wall with a thud. 
For the two years in which you had known Beomgyu, sorry, been acquainted with, you don’t think the two of you had ever as much as even shook hands, much less hugged. But now his face was only inches from yours, burning with so much rage that you thought you might just combust into a pile of ashes on the floor. His chest heaves, and his grip on your shirt is near deadly as he yanks the fabric up, his taller frame looming over your own. 
You scoff, trying to mask the unease that immediately surged within your chest at his close proximity. “See? Can’t even bring your mom up without you throwing a hissy fit", you jeer. — The scowl once on his lips, slowly turns into a sneer, a sly look emerging on his face, like you had just said exactly what he needed to hear, given him the opportunity he’d been searching for. 
His breath is warm on your already hot body as he speaks. “Well it’s not exactly like you’re any better.” You catch his tongue dragging across his bottom lip, as if savouring the moment, his eyes focused solely on the way your once stoic expression fell. “Can’t even mention her without you bursting out into tears.” — You open your mouth to object, your brows furrowing at the accusation but he’s quicker, shamelessly cutting you off to get his point across. “There’s no use in denying it. Don’t you think I’ve heard you? Crying in your room late at night, crying for your dead mommy.”
His gaze snaps to your wrist, hand darting out to grab ahold of it as his thumb slides across the bracelet resting there. “And this? A souvenir of her death? That’s pathetic.” He cocks his head to the side, a wicked grin spreading across his lips. “It’s like a child sleeping with stuffed toys”, he sneers, letting go of you with a small grimace before his grip returns to the collar of your shirt. 
You hated the way your teary eyes almost immediately gave you away, and you fervently tried to blink them away; much to no avail as Beomgyu chuckled. “Did I hit a nerve?” He wonders, voice laced with fabricated pity. It made you sick to your stomach. — “Sorry, princess”, he coos, but nothing about the way he gripped onto your flimsy blouse made for a convincing apology. Your eyes narrow at the familiar nickname and his smirk only widens. “Isn’t that what your daddy would say? Princess?” 
Hearing the name you treasured so dearly coming from his mouth, the word tainted with his hatred and evil, it made you bite the inside of your lip, hard. “What? Don’t like it?” He hums, his fingers on your shirt loosening, if only slightly as he leans even closer. It was easy to make out the details of his face now, the piercing stuck through the skin of his eyebrow, the area slightly red, as if irritated. The dark charcoal around his eyes, you wondered if he slept in it, probably. You will your gaze to stay locked with his, not daring to glance down at his lips. 
“Then what should I call you? Sis? Sister? Little Sister?” He looks almost as if he’s about to burst into laughter and you wanted nothing more than to slap that disgusting smirk from his face. “I’m not your sister.” You state, refusing to ever be perceived in such a way. — Beomgyu let’s his head fall to the side, his brows raising in a flicker of surprise. “But we’re family now, aren’t we?” 
You close your eyes, thinking that maybe if you just pretended that he wasn’t there for an extended period of time, he might actually disappear. But once you reopen them, you find him still watching you, his smirk stretched so wide that he almost appeared uncanny. “You don’t know the first thing about what makes a family.” You let your words linger in the now very thick air, watching with an almost gleeful expression as Beomgyu lets out a small scoff, though leaning back as he lets go of your shirt. 
“Quit trying to act like you’ve got me all figured out.” Is all he says, his voice now eerily calm, a kind of calm that makes your blood run cold. — “Then quit acting like such a terrible person, and maybe people would start seeing you for something else.” You mutter, your words not intended for his ears to catch, but they do. His gaze flickers over your body, pressed against the wall in an attempt to create as much space between the two of you as humanly possible. 
He shakes his head, his lip twitching as he runs a hand through his long hair. “How about you quit trying to act like you know what makes a terrible person.” — His words leave you silenced long enough for him to make his escape as he heads for the staircase. The last thing you see is his dark retreating figure, the sound of him trudging up the steps filling the house. You slump against the wall, letting out a shaky exhale as you let your eyes fall closed, already dreading the week ahead. 
⸝⸝
To your surprise, day one and two went by like usual, with the absence of your father and Ms Choi of course. You and Beomgyu managed to avoid one another just like normal, and whilst you ate dinner downstairs, he always brought his food to his room. Sometimes it was almost as if you were living alone, you had the whole house pretty much to yourself and you often took the opportunity to lounge by the sofa in the living room. 
After your fight two days ago, part of you had thought that things might worsen even further between the two of you. But if anything, you’d seen even less of him than you usually would and you think you could count the interactions you’d shared with him on your fingers. 
Your whole body feels heavy as your head hits the pillow that night. Four more days, you tell yourself. You could do four more days. All you had to do was keep up the role you’d been playing for the past three days. 
And as you lay in bed, you let your thoughts wander, wander to your dad. The two of you engaged in shorter calls every evening. It was a nice distraction from your otherwise plaguing reality. Your father told you about the beach, the ocean and the seashells; he and Ms Choi were staying at a hotel by the seaside for the week, and you felt your heart swell at the excitement in his voice. 
“You’ll have to come with us next time!” He exclaimed, the powerful winds surrounding him made his words come out jagged on the other end of the line. Still, you thought you were able to make out the faint sounds of waves crashing against the shore as he walked along the water. — “I’d be happy to”, you agree, a small grin playing on your lips at the thought of going on vacation with your dad again, it had been so long. 
Soon Ms Choi joins your conversation, you hear them share a quick kiss before her tender voice addresses you. “How’s Beomgyu doing dear?” She wonders and your smile immediately falters at the mention of his name. You bite your lip, unsure of what to say, did she not talk to him, not at all, not once? — In the end, you settle for something for half a lie and half a truth. “He’s doing fine.” 
Your dads girlfriend exhales on the other line as she thanks you. “Are you two getting along well?” Your father asks, a hint of suspicion following his inquiry. Even though Ms Choi was quick to defend her son, your dad still seemed to hold back when it came to him, if only slightly. “We’re doing just fine.” You lied, not wanting to address just how awkward things were and how you most definitely wanted them to return home as soon as possible. You wouldn’t ruin your dads shot at happiness just to soothe your own worries. 
But as night approaches, the faint glow of the moon seeping through your thin curtains, you find yourself unable to sleep. Though this time, it’s not because of your reeling mind, rather a faint noise coming from the room down the hall and to your left. — During your previous nights, the house had been eerily silent, almost deafening as it added to the feeling of you living there alone. And Beomgyu was not one to play music at such an hour, even though he was likely still very much awake. 
With a small frown you sit up, fingers grasping the bed sheets beneath you as you shift on the mattress. It was near impossible to make out any details regarding the noise, only a hushed sequence here and there could be heard and your frown deepens. But your desire for a full night’s sleep quickly overweighs any doubt as you’re reminded of the early morning class you had the following day, and the bed squeaks as you gingerly climb off of it, quietly venturing out into the dark hallway to face whatever awaits you. 
You’re able to locate the source of the sound as soon as you step out into the dark hall, and your throat goes dry as your eyes seize the door leading to Beomgyu’s bedroom. — The floorboards creak under your weight, making you freeze as you listen for a shift in the noise coming from his room, but he doesn’t seem to have noticed. 
Carefully you creep forward, a hand on the wall to guide you as you near your target. The closer you get the clearer the noise gets, and for a moment you wondered if he was hurt as deep grunt-like sounds slipped through the crack of the wooden door. What would you even tell him? Biting the inside of your cheek, you shake your head. Just yell at him, cause a scene, do something.
Your fingers are wrapped around the door handle when you suddenly stop, your heart practically leaping out of your chest as a small moan reaches your ears. Stunned, you remain frozen in place as you listen to the ragged breathing of Beomgyu, coming from inside his bedroom and your foggy brain slowly pieces together what he was up to. A wave of disgust washes over you, perhaps even embarrassment at having caught him doing something like that. 
It takes you about half a minute to snap out of your initial shock, eyes darting back down the hall as you plan to make your escape, because there was no way you were going to let him know that you’d heard him. But just as you turn around to head back to safety, a deep groan makes you halt. “Mhhn fuck”, Beomgyu grunts, his voice muffled by the wall separating you but you clearly catch the ragged moan following the curse. 
You thought you could make out something else in the far background, a faint whisper of someone else. He hadn’t brought someone over had he? No, that’s impossible, you would’ve known. And soon the all too familiar and almost theatrical moan of a woman pierces the air.
Teeth latching on to your bottom lip, you stand torn, your brain desperately yelling for you to leave, to forget that any of this ever happened, to not pry further and spare your last bits of sanity. But another part of you, a far more sinister one, keeps your body locked in place, making you unable to move neither forward nor back; forcing you to listen as your Beomgyu gets off to some cheap porn video in his room.
You felt dirty just by hearing him, but the other part of you felt something dangerously close to excitement, your heart thumping unmistakably faster as your gaze flickers back toward his shut door. 
“H-ah..” He breathes and you swallow a gulp, sweat sliding down your forehead at the strange feelings swirling inside of you. Your hands clench at your sides, shivers rippling through your body as you hold your tongue, terrified of making your presence known. — He should be ashamed, not you, you had merely passed by, right? So why did you feel so bashful standing here, right outside his room, in the middle of the night, like some creep. 
“Mhhn fucking hell”, he croaks and you screw your eyes shut, desperately trying to erase the images playing in front of you like that of an old film. Images of him, his head thrown back, his lips slightly parted, lidded eyes and his hand… his hand wrapped around– “Oh my god”, you breathe, bracing yourself against the wall as your head falls forward. You had to get out of here. 
⸝⸝
Disgusting. That’s what he was. Not only a loathsome person but a pervert too. And as you walk down the familiar street, your school bag flung over your shoulder, you think of ways to confront him about his behavior. He was in the wrong here, not you. Besides, your request for him to keep it down at night was reasonable. 
The wooden fence gate feels rough under the tips of your fingers as you push it open, your eyes falling on the quaint house before you. The gravel makes a crunching noise beneath your shoes as you near the front door, the lump in your throat only growing in size. — It was such a pretty house, and to think that something so dark resided within its walls made you sick. Still, you unlock the old door and make your way inside. 
The familiar scent of roses invades your senses almost immediately and you take pride in the comforting smell, allowing yourself to just stay for a moment. You knew that he was home already, having spotted his car on your way back, and it didn’t exactly take a genius to figure out where he was currently lounging at. — Discarding your bag alongside your shoes, you begin the small journey up the stairs, not planning on prolonging the inevitable conversation. 
The blaring music fills your ears as soon as you reach the top step and you heave a sigh. You could do this, you wouldn’t back down. — The first knock is petty, weak, barely audible over the heavy bass thumping on the other side. You bite your lip, raising your fist once more, this time you give the wood a harsher tap. But still, nothing. You stand there for a moment, listening to the unfamiliar song playing and you wonder why he felt the need to drown himself in music as vile as that. Perhaps it was to quiet the undeniably gruesome thoughts you could only imagine filled his mind. 
“Beomgyu!” You shout his name, knuckles near hurting as they pound the door in front of you. Finally, the loud melody comes to an abrupt halt and you can hear him shuffling about inside his room, the soft padding of footsteps approaching and soon he reveals himself. — He looks the same as he always did, as he always had. Except he looks…different. You think it might have something to do with what you had heard him do the previous night. Because something was different, something was no longer the same. 
“What do you want?” He spits, the words sound almost like an accusation and you watch as his brows furrow, dark gaze narrowing down on you. Suddenly, you feel your composure crumble, the phrases you’d gone over in your head so many times on the way back home suddenly diminishing to nothing as you stand before him. Your lips part, for whatever excuse you could possibly find but Beomgyu beats you to the case. 
“If you’re here to complain about how you miss your daddy then I don’t give a shit.” 
Your mouth closes again, your brows mimicking his frown as you peer up at him. Is that what he thinks of you? Is that how he perceives you? As nothing more but a crybaby who can’t go a day without her father, who sobs herself to sleep in the absence of her mother? — “That’s not why I–” — “Like I said”, he cuts you off, his gaze hardening, “I don’t give a shit.” 
The grimace painting your face is surely unmistakable and your fists clench as you swallow back the insults waiting on your tongue. “Well I do”, you say, masking your otherwise trembling voice with firmness as you maintain the tense eye contact. Beomgyu appears, if not surprised then at least taken aback, his lip twitching as he lets out a short huff. He folds his arms over his chest, covering the print on his black t-shirt, seemingly waiting for you to continue. 
“I’m here to…to ask you..” You find yourself stumbling over your rehearsed lines, mind fumbling for a way to approach the situation without making it awkward for the both of you. Not wanting him to know that you’d heard him but also wanting him to be aware of the fact that you knew exactly what he’d been up to. — “What I want to say is, please keep it down..at…at night, some of us are trying to sleep you know..” 
Carefully you peek up at him, trying your hardest to subtly gauge his reaction. But Beomgyu only hums, his brows raising in play-pretend surprise as he leans against the doorframe. “Keep what down? It’s not exactly like I’m blasting music or anythin’” he muses. You shake your head, “that’s not what I’m asking, I’m asking you to keep it down when…when y-you you know..” 
The smirk slowly etching its way to his lips should’ve told you everything you needed to know. That he was just looking for ways to push you further, to rile you up and get you flustered, but for some reason it didn’t, and you kept going. — “When I what?” He wonders, eyes flickering over your guarded stance as you awkwardly shift in front of him, letting your weight fall on one leg. “Come on, you know what I mean”, you practically whine, not caring about how immature and childish you sounded as you avoided actually uttering the words out loud. 
“When I jack off?” He asks, his tone nonchalant as his hands slide down the pockets of his already low hanging jeans. You meekly nod, gaze dropping to the floor as your cheeks flush with color. “Y-Yeah that…you’re kind of..loud”, you cough, anxiously crossing your arms over your chest as you clear your throat. 
Beomgyu seems to be considering your words for a moment, his attention fixed on something behind you as he quietly hums. But then he leans forward, his face landing almost inches from your own and you can clearly see the smudged liner around his eyes now. “And you’ve got a problem with that?” He tilts his head to the side, studying you expectantly. 
“Come on now, sis”, he drawls and you cringe, hating how the word sounded on his lips. “You can’t possibly tell me that you’re not twice as loud when you touch yourself.” — The statement made your eyes blow wide as your jaw slacked. Feebly you shake your head in an attempt to deny his accusations. “I- No!” You shriek, taking a small step back as your hands wave in objection. “I don’t– I don’t do stuff…stuff like that..” 
Beomgyu’s smirk widens as he watches your apprehensive response, a low chuckle rumbling in his chest. “Stuff like that?” He repeats, the sentence sickly sweet on his tongue. “You mean you’ve never played with yourself like that? How dull.” — You swallow, your throat suddenly feeling beyond parched as you shake your head once more. Was that so bad? Did that make you so different? You’d never understood the appeal, never felt those feelings, never even had a boyfriend. It shouldn’t matter should it? 
So why did it make Beomgyu look at you like that? Like you had just become something completely different in his eyes, something prized, something desirable. “Really?” He repeats, as if unbelieving of what he was currently hearing. Your quiet “no” is met by an even more menacing smirk as his tongue prods at the inside of his cheek. 
“Why, your daddy must be real’ proud of you then”, he grins and you feel your stomach twist. — “N-No he doesn’t care about stuff like that.” Because why would he? He was your father, sure you were close but some things were better off kept private. But it seemed no matter what you said could make the hungry look in his gaze go away and you felt your heart rate increase tenfold. 
Beomgyu merely scoffs, clearly not buying your truths. “Well then your daddy doesn’t know how much of life his daughter is truly missing out on.” — You frown, straightening your back if only slightly as you regard him with a hint of determination. “I’m not missing out on anything, to be frank, I’m quite happy the way I am right now.” You give a short pause, stopping only to give him a quick one over. “Not that the same can be said for you.” 
It feels good to watch his once smug expression morph into a much more scowl-like one as he lets out a short huff. When he doesn’t say anything, you feel a proud smirk crawling its way to your lips and you barely manage to conceal it as you turn to walk back to your room. — Only when you’ve reached your door, does he speak again, and you’re surprised to find him still lingering by his own doorway. 
“Do happy people cry everyday too, or is that just you?” 
⸝⸝
You’re unable to get his words out of your mind and you spend the majority of the following night mulling over them. “Do happy people cry everyday?” Do they? Was crying necessarily a bad thing? People cry when they’re happy too, people cry for a variety of reasons. Some merely sniffle,  some sob whilst others practically scream. Could happiness really be measured in tears or was that just something he’d said to get on your nerves, to have the last word? 
You lay tossing and turning in bed, your blanket bunching up around your legs before you eventually kicked it off again. — If only your mom was still around, she would be sure to have an answer, for she always did.. You nod to yourself as you mindlessly fiddle with the bracelet around your wrist.
Perhaps you were over analyzing his words, twisting and turning something completely meaningless for hours on end. But it was the only way you’d be able to feel at ease. You had a habit of trying to understand things on a deeper level, knowledge comforted you. It was why you nearly drowned yourself in your studies, why you spent so much time indulging in literature or film. It was your escape. 
Part of you supposed you should have Beomgyu completely figured out by now, with the way you memorized each snarky comment of his. But you never did, it felt like you knew nothing about him yet everything all at once. Maybe your knowledge of him was biased. You’d been quick to snap his picture, to paint a vision of him so sinister that you found it hard to view him any differently. — In your eyes, Beomgyu was a selfish and bad person, a person who did not feel empathy nor compassion for others. And perhaps that was why your theories about him seemed to lead you down the same path each time. 
But you didn't think that you were a close minded person… Was there really something you had missed, something you had overlooked? Was there more to Beomgyu than he let on to? 
You don’t have to ponder much longer for a quiet knock to your door rips you from the deep thoughts previously consuming your mind. With a small flinch you shot up from your bed, crawling back against the headboard as your eyes trained on the entryway to your room. For a moment you think it might be an intruder, but what kind of thief would knock? — Not only knock but proceed to open the door without waiting for a reply. You only knew one person so unthoughtful. 
Beomgyu’s shadow is dark, shielded from the dim luminance of the moon mere feet away from him as he stands in the doorway. One step forward would reveal his face entirely, and you find yourself both longing and dreading for him to move. — Why was he here? You guys made sure to avoid one another diligently so why was he willingly ruining it? 
“I can help you.” 
His voice is low, but he speaks clearly. A crease runs along your forehead as your brows pull into a frown. “Help me?” You repeat, the confusion evident in your tone as you shift against the pillow behind your back. Beomgyu nods, taking a bold step forward which casts an eerie glow across the side of his face. Your gaze flickers from his intense and dark eyes to his lips, pulled into a small smirk and your stomach drops. 
You knew why he was here. Because what other motive could he possibly have? — You had seen the way he treated those around him, you had witnessed the effect he had on his mom as she fell to her knees in tears, the way his words had sliced through you like daggers of a knife, shamelessly cutting your barely healed skin. Beomgyu made things around him die, every touch of his was poison, lethal. And now he had come to kill you too. 
It wasn’t like his sudden change in demeanor was unexpected, you knew that he was capable of breaking things, breaking people. He had just never paid you much attention because he thought you were already broken. The death of your mother slowly eating you away as you cried for her each night. — But you can tell he’s had a change of heart, the way his eyes rake across your body, barely concealed by the flimsy pajamas you wore, untainted, untouched, pure. Ready for him to kill. 
“I don’t need your help.” You try to evade him off, convince him that you were no object of his affection. But it was impossible. Beomgyu shakes his head, slowly approaching your bed before he takes a seat, causing the cushion beneath him to dip slightly. — “You don’t even know what I’m about to offer you”, he muses, fingers trailing up your exposed leg and you quickly withdraw it, stuffing it beneath the blanket. 
“I know that I do not need it”, you bite back, twisting your body as far away from him as possible. He huffs out a short breath, biting the inside of his cheek, seemingly in deep thought. You peer at him through the corner of your eye, lips curling into a small grimace. — “Do you plan on living in the dark forever then?” He finally wonders, his voice a mere murmur and you frown. “I could show you, show you the light”, he hums, fingers drumming against the mattress leisurely. 
You’re unable to hide the scoff you emit before turning back to face him. “You couldn’t find light if it so much as presented itself in front of you.” Beomgyu’s jaw visibly clenches at your words, his hand stilling against the bed as his gaze flickers up to meet yours, an underlying twinge of curiosity lingering behind his otherwise cold and emotionless eyes. —  “No? And why’s that?” 
Your lip twitches, a small grimace of pure disgust threatening to overtake your entire face as you regard him with disdain. “Because something as dark and twisted as you cannot possibly seek light. You repell it.” 
The last sentence rings out in the silent air, and you watch as the intrigue in his eyes becomes put out like that of a dying fire. His expression contorted into the one you knew so well, the cruel one, the one that hurt people. “What, and you think you’re some kind of saint?” He jeers, trying to mask where your words had evidently stung. — Were you a saint? Hardly. But you didn’t hurt the people around you just because you could, just because life had treated you unfairly. That was the difference between you and Beomgyu. 
“You know what I think of you?” He says, the bed squeaking as he leans forward, dangerously close. “I think you’re scared.” He drawls, eyes boring into your own with so much vigor that you almost felt pity for the anger that consumed him. How miserable he must be to live like that. — “I’m not scared.” You calmly state, shifting against the pillows as you instinctively try to create distance between the two of you. Quickly taking note of your hesitant body language, he smirks, “no? Then prove it.”
“Prove that you’re not afraid of the darkness, of my darkness.” 
You remain silent for a moment, watching as he awaits your answer, your next course of action. Was this a bad idea? Probably. You had told yourself over and over that you wouldn’t let yourself get consumed by him, become tainted by his flawed hands. Yet you find yourself reaching for the blanket covering your body, pulling it from your legs as you discard it on the floor. Beomgyu follows the movement with an amused look, an almost wicked one before his smokey eyes snap back to yours. 
“Fine”, you say, adjusting yourself on the bed as you let your hands fall to your sides, “show me.” The simple statement makes his face twist into a look of pure smugness and Beomgyu wastes no time in scooting closer, fingers wrapping around both of your wrists as he positions himself before you. “You have no idea what you’re asking of me”, he murmurs, his lip twitching into a sinister grin as he does. It was almost as if your obliviousness spurred him on, your naivety making his mind reel. 
His breath is warm on your face as he studies you closely, from the way blood rushes beneath your cheeks to your eyelashes fluttering as you try to focus with him so close. “Have you ever kissed someone before?” He asks, the underlying curiosity in his words palpable. You try to think of any occasion in which you might’ve, but after a good moment you shake your head. “Only once…in middle school, a smell peck on the lips..” You admit, albeit a little sheepishly. 
The smirk on his face only widened, exposing his sharp teeth as Beomgyu chuckled. “That doesn’t count”, he states, seemingly pleased with your answer, with your honesty, your trust. Biting your bottom lip, you swallow before nodding slowly. “I’ll show you how to.” He then mumbles, and suddenly his nose is practically grazing yours. You suck in a sharp breath, eyes widening as you watch his confident ones. 
Then his lips press against your own, and they’re surprisingly soft. At first he remained still, completely unmoving and you wondered what on god's green earth he was doing. But soon he lets his eyes close, one of his hands letting go of your wrist as he cups your cheek. The small caress makes your eyes widen further and you resist the urge to pull back. Unsure of what to do with yourself, you hesitantly respond to the tentative kiss, letting your eyes flutter shut as well. 
You knew that you shouldn’t be doing this, that it was wrong, taboo even. He was your step brother.. at least he was bound to be once your parents got married. Guilt roots itself in the pits of your stomach, making it twist and turn uncomfortably as you try to relax in his grip. — He doesn’t push you any further and it takes you by surprise. Instead he lets his lips linger on top of yours, and when he pulls away moments later, a small pecking sound follows it. You watch through lidded eyes as his narrowed gaze studies you, the hand on your cheek moving to your chin. 
“How was it?” He wonders, as if expecting a review of some sort. Your mouth parts but you can’t seem to find the words. How could you describe the shame and the guilt? How could you ever verbalize the way his soft lips had felt on yours, such a thing was impossible. — “It felt weird..” Your hushed whisper echoes out like church bells in your ears and you remain very aware of the way his fingers reside around your chin, locking your face in place. 
Beomgyu lets out a short breath, his thumb pulling your bottom lip down as his gaze catches onto your exposed teeth. “First time always feels weird”, he states and before you get to prepare yourself, he dives right back in, except this time he goes straight for the kill. — You let out a small yelp as he pries your mouth open, immediately slipping his wet tongue inside to slide against yours. You can still taste the minty toothpaste on him and the sensation of something so wet and…alive, in your mouth, makes you cringe. 
You still allow him to kiss you, to push you back against the pillows as his hands roam your body, his poisonous touch spreading across your skin like wildfire. You knew that this was exactly what he wanted, to ruin something so perfectly pure, to take something from you that you could never get back. And for some reason, you let him. — Only when his hand reaches the waistband of your pajama shorts do you stop him, eyes wide as you push him back. 
“Wait.” 
The kiss breaks with a wet sound and a small string of saliva still connects the two of you. Struggling to find a suitable approach to the matter, you let your gaze drop to his chest, heaving a small sigh as you bite your lip. “I…I don’t know if…I mean I haven’t..” Honestly you didn’t even know what you were getting at yourself, you supposed you wanted to prolong the moment, if just a moment longer. 
Beomgyu regards you with an expression you don’t think you’d ever seen on him before; a mixture of both intrigue and desire. “Are you scared?” He wonders and without thinking, you nod. His lips stretch wide, the hand on your shorts moving to your inner thigh as he gives it a light squeeze and you nearly flinch at the touch. “Good”, he huffs, his fingers venturing beneath the fabric of your pajamas as he gauges your reaction closely. 
When he pulls your shorts down, you gingerly try and conceal yourself, your cheeks flushing in all shades of red as your thighs squeeze shut. “Don’t be embarrassed”, he tsk’s, his hands on your knees as he firmly spreads them. — “I’ve seen plenty of pussies before”, he merely shrugs, “yours won’t be any different.” His reassurance didn’t help ease much of your worries as you let him pry your legs open. 
He starts slow, and you’re thankful; his index and middle finger gently rubbing you through the soft cotton of your panties and you resist the urge to hide your face as you squirm against him. — It wasn’t like you’d never touched yourself, because you had…you think. Like any other young teenager you’d experimented a little with your body, but as an inexperienced 15-year old, the results had proved futile. You never had the urge you suppose, you didn’t even know how it was supposed to feel like. But as Beomgyu touches you through your underwear, a strange feeling mingles alongside the guilt and shame in your stomach. 
His eyes are on you, on only you, watching as you bite your bottom lip, your hands fidgeting with the bed sheets as you try to suppress the small noises bubbling in your throat. Not until his fingers find your clit, rubbing it deliberately through your panties, do you let out a small squeak. “Is…Is it supposed to feel like that?” — Beomgyu’s dark gaze shifts from your spread legs and over to your wide stare. He nods, “does it feel good?” 
“Strange..” You quietly whisper, though you made no move to stop him as his index finger hooks around the waistband of your underwear. “Yeah?” He murmurs, taking his time as he slowly pulls the piece of garment from your body, letting it slide along your legs before he discards it on the floor. “You’ll get used to it”, he muses, eyes shifting to your exposed cunt as they visibly darken, “it comes with experience.” 
You had no clue what to expect, what to feel, how to respond. Your whole body felt tense as his cold fingers brushed against your naked skin, inching their way up and suddenly it felt like you were under a microscope, every single part of you being presented under a stark light. Beomgyu on the other hand, seems far more at ease as he lets two of his fingers swipe across your cute folds, teasingly pushing them apart as he slowly rubs you. 
It takes everything in you not to cringe at the weird and damp feeling pooling between your legs, the consistent throb of your cunt and the small cry you emit as he flicks over your clit once more. He sighs, “virgin pussies are my favorite”, his gaze shifts to his already glistening fingers, “they get wet so easily.” — You merely let out a small whimper at his words, thigh involuntarily twitching, the movement immediately catching his eye as his lips curl into a smirk. 
“W-Wait!” You croak as you suddenly feel him prodding against your fluttering hole, your muscles taut as you shift on the bed. Beomgyu stops, hand resting against your core as he studies you with an indifferent expression. “W-Won’t that hurt?” It felt embarrassing to ask, but the thought of him pushing something inside of you…it scared you. — But Beomgyu only shrugs. “It might”, he drawls, his fingers resuming their work on your cunt as he repositions his index one right above the tight rim of muscle, “depends on how bad you want me.” 
Want him? You didn’t know if you wanted him, it wasn’t like you liked him, right? You hated Beomgyu, you’d hated him for two years. You hated how he treated his mother, how he treated you, with such coldness and such little empathy. You hated how he made you cry, how he made you feel small and weak. You hated how he made you feel bad for grieving your own mother. 
But as your gaze shifts to his face, and as you will yourself to look past the cruelty, the darkness, you can still make out the boy you met that night, the one you’d had a small and what you thought was an insignificant crush on. From the black charcoal around his eyes, to the silver jewelry bored into his eyebrow; his black hair, nearly reaching his shoulders now, and his dark eyes, his eyes that both scared and intrigued you. 
You gasp when he without warning pushes his finger past your folds, immediately curling it inside of you, making your back arch off the bed in sheer surprise. Beomgyu’s attention is solely on your flushed face, watching in contentment as you writher under his touch, as you slowly lose yourself. — “O-Oh..” Is all you manage to squeak out between the ragged breaths. It felt weird and uncomfortable, but it didn't hurt, instead the fluttering sensation in your stomach only seemed to grow. 
“Such a greedy pussy”, Beomgyu hums as he feels you pulsate around his finger, “sucking me in like a complete whore.” You shake your head, “I-I’m not..” The words die in your throat as he adds he slides a second digit past your tight rim, making you shriek as he stretches your cunt. 
His touch felt poisonous but you couldn’t find it in you to push him off, to tell him to stop. No matter how many times you told yourself how wrong it was, you couldn’t help but slowly succumb to the darkness that was Beomgyu. Wanting, no needing, more. It was as if he’d introduced you to a most dangerous drug, and you find yourself desperately seeking another fix, a stronger one. 
Your short nails have torn the bright sheets covering the mattress, and your arms tremble as you lock eyes with him. Satisfactory, that was the only way you could describe the expression painting his face. You don’t think you’d ever seen Beomgyu as anything but angry, but this…this was far from it. He looks ready to devour you whole, his brooding eyes fixating on the way your jaw slacked, your saliva coated lips parted and your eyebrows drawn together in such an endearing manner. 
“Feel good?” He wonders, his brow twitching slightly when his thumb presses against your clit, eliciting a high pitched moan from you as you squirm against him. “I’ll take that as a yes”, he drawls and before you know it, his fingers are gone, making a sloppy sound as they withdraw from your cunt. You whine, hips bucking up in an attempt to seek his touch and your cheeks flare up in color. “W-Why did you stop..?” You pathetically wonder, biting the inside of your cheek, thinking that you had possibly done something wrong. 
Beomgyu doesn’t say anything as he brings his sticky fingers to his face, inhaling your scent before shoving them into his mouth. Your jaw falls open in bewilderment, how could he just do something like that so…casually. — “Come on now princess, we’ve only just gotten started.” 
Even more? 
Your already wide eyes dilate even further, completely forgetting to be angry over the nickname he’d used as his hand dips inside the waistband of his sweats, pulling his hard cock from his briefs. It wasn’t like you were a total prude, you knew what a dick looked like, you just…had never seen one up close. — Beomgyu takes his time as he wraps his fingers around its base, languidly stroking himself as pearly beads of what you could only assume to be precum spilled from the slit on top. 
The thought of having that inside of you makes your throat go dry and you shift uncomfortably on the bed. “Come on now, sis, don’t grow shy on me”, he drawls, stifling a groan as his thumb flicks over his tip. The knot in your stomach returns and you shoot him a glare, “I am not your ‘sis’”, you state through gritted teeth. But Beomgyu only chuckles before leaning forward, his face drawing in close once more. With one hand still on his cock, the other one presses flat against the mattress as he hovers in front of you. 
“Lie down.” 
His sharp command sends a shiver down your spine and you hesitantly comply, awkwardly sliding yourself down between his parted legs until only your head remains perched on the pillow. From this angle, Beomgyu’s long hair falls in front of his face and you resist the urge to reach up and brush it away. Instead your nervous eyes flicker to his cock as he gently taps it against your inner thigh. Your gaze lingers on the way his arousal spills onto your naked skin and suddenly a wave of realization washes over you. 
“Shouldn’t we use a condom?” You whisper, biting the inside of your cheek as your attention flits back to the smug expression on his face. “Why? That takes away half the fun”, he hums, letting his tip part your puffy folds as he nudges it against your throbbing clit. “H-ah b-but isn’t it unsafe?” You whine, unable to keep from grinding against him, desperately seeking his touch. 
Beomgyu lets out an exasperated sigh, reaching a hand up to run through his slightly disheveled hair. “Don’t tell me you’re scared”, he grunts, his fingers clasping around your chin, pulling your face so that it rests inches from his. Your breath is uneven and jagged as you reluctantly meet his gaze, a quiet “no” spilling from your lips. — He grins, tongue dragging across the bottom row of teeth in his mouth, “such a terrible liar.” 
You don’t have time to think, much less act before the head of his cock pushed past the rim of taut muscle as he slid inside your warm cunt, almost immediately groaning at how you wrapped around him so deliciously. — “Fuck, you really are a virgin aren’t you?” He breathes, lips hovering above yours and you weakly nod. The stretch of his thick cock making you go near cross eyed as you grasped at his shoulders. It was unlike anything you’d ever experienced before and you were sure that Beomgyu enjoyed every second of it. 
He had been the first, the first one to get his hands on you, to spew his poison all over your pure and innocent virgin body, and he would make sure to do so thoroughly. His mouth is on your neck, tongue licking at your skin and you cringe away from the action but he doesn’t falter, lips immediately chasing yours as he keeps you in place. The kiss is rougher than the previous, hungry and disoriented as Beomgyu messily jerks his hips against yours. Your nails dig into the apex of his shoulders and his name echoes through in the pristine bedroom as you moan out in pleasure. 
“Fuck, I’m gonna cum right away if you keep that up”, he grunts, fingers digging into your cheeks as he withdraws from your lips. Your eyes widen as you feebly try and shake your head, dreading for him to finish inside. But he doesn’t, instead he redirects his focus to your neck, resuming what he’d been doing as his tongue darts out to swipe across its juncture. You squeal when his teeth graze your skin, the hands on his shoulders moving to his dark hair. 
The marks he left on your untouched skin were bound to linger for at least a couple of days, he made sure of that. Reveling in the fact that you’d let him in, let him close, allowed him to take something so precious, something that you had been clinging on to for so long. He would have you, all of you, even if only once, he would be sure to leave an impression. 
And you know that you should feel ashamed, feel guilty, dirty even. But something feels different, something about him, about Beomgyu. It’s not the Beomgyu you loathed, the Beomgyu who’d made you cry, the Beomgyu who made you feel worthless. — None of the anger, the hatred, the fire; none of that lingered right now. And had it not been for his sharp teeth on your skin and his rough pace as his cock rammed into your throbbing cunt, the moment might’ve even been tender. 
There’s an unfamiliar feeling building in the pits of your stomach and it had long since overridden the previous shame and guilt. Unsure of what to make of it, you desperately tug on Beomgyu’s hair, eventually making his head raise from your chest with a small frown, the liner around his eyes even more smudged than usual now. — “I’m…I…” your face turns beet red as you stumble over your words, not knowing how to express yourself. 
He licks his already wet lips, his pace momentarily slowing and you whimper at the discomfort soaring through your body. “You close?” He asks, his fingers brushing a strand of hair from your sweaty forehead. You open your mouth only to close it again, nodding sheepishly as your hands twist in his hair. Beomgyu groans as he lets his fingers slide down your stomach, reaching where your bodies connected like one, middle finger rubbing your clit menacingly as he watches you arch against him with a broken moan. 
Your first ever orgasm felt out of this world, your cunt clenching around his cock with such vigor that you thought you might cry, a string of incoherent and high pitched whines ripping from your throat as you pull Beomgyu close, and for the first time, you’re the one initiating the kiss as you slam your lips on his. — He groans into your mouth, letting you slide your tongue against his, albeit a little awkwardly as you had no clue of what you were doing. 
Finally, as your climax comes to an end, you find yourself relaxing against the mattress, the fingers in his hair loosening their grip as you allow yourself to kiss him slowly. — “F-Fuck princess”, he grunts, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth before letting go. You respond by eagerly raising your hips to meet his, wincing at how sensitive you felt as his cock twitched inside of you. “Fuck, fuck, wait”, he breaths, tearing himself from you as he swiftly pulls out with a small hiss. 
In your euphoric state, your eyes drift to his hand wrapped around his shaft, quickly jerking himself off as his gaze fixates on your wet cunt. Then he notices you, his lips curling into a wicked grin as he reaches for your wrist, “come here”, he urges as he guides the flat of your hand to wrap around his cock. — Blinking, your attention flits between his expectant face and his heavy dick in your grasp as you contemplate your next move. It wasn’t like you’d ever done something like this before but it looked easy enough when he was doing it. 
With determination you begin to carefully stroke him, biting the inside of your cheek at the squelching sound erupting as his arousal smeared across your fingers. Beomgyu’s hips jerk forward and your movements stutter. — “H-ah, fucking hell d-don’t stop”, he groans, his jaw slacked as his eyes tightly squeezed shut. A quiet “sorry” slips from your lips and your pace returns as you work to get him off. 
“F-Fuck go a bit faster, yeah?” He mutters, his hand joining in on top of yours as he ups the intensity. Merely following his command, you grip him tighter, drawing a strained moan from him as your fingers drag across his tip. — It made you feel oddly powerful, seeing him like this, his otherwise indifferent face completely flushed, and instead of presenting himself with a mean scowl, he looked to be in complete bliss as he let his head fall back. 
A final twitch of his causes hot liquid to spurt from his throbbing cock, the white substance coating both your hand and lower abdomen. He heaves a sigh and you feel him slowly go soft in your hand before you pull it away. Beomgyu runs his fingers through his hair, parting it before letting his arm drop back down, his gaze landing on the mess on your stomach. He tsk’s spreading the sticky fluid across your skin. “What would your daddy think if he saw you like this, hm?” He murmurs, licking his lips before bringing his cum-coated fingers to your face. 
You shake your head, without the waves of pleasure sparking through you, the shame and the guilt suddenly crawled right back. “I- I don’t want to talk about him..” You whine, trying to force the image of your father out of your mind. — “His beautiful princess, completely ruined by something so…what did you say I was? Dark?” 
Without warning he pushes his wet fingers inside your mouth, making you cringe at the salty taste of him. “I bet your daddy would hate you forever”, Beomgyu finally states, watching as you frown, lips closing around the digits in your mouth. — And when he finally withdraws them, you splutter, “my father doesn’t hate me, but yours seem to do.” 
Beomgyu’s jaw twitches, his lips curling up into a small scowl and the desire previously filling the air slowly simmers out. You knew that he wanted you to feel just as miserable as he did. But you wouldn’t let him, you wouldn’t let him get to you like that. — Half expecting an insult thrown your way, you’re surprised when he merely tucks himself back into his sweats, rising from the bed as he regards you with dark eyes. “Fine, keep living with such fantasies and we’ll see just how long it takes for them to get crushed.” 
Without as much as another word, he leaves your room, the door slamming shut behind him as the small house falls under an eerie silence once more. 
⸝⸝
Your parents came home two days later, and though you wanted to say that things had changed between you and Beomgyu after your…night together, it was safe to say that they hadn’t. At least not on his part. You on the other hand, couldn’t get the feeling of his hands off of your body, it was like he’d permanently imprinted himself on your skin. It feels disgusting, and you had spent three hours in the shower the morning after, vigorously trying to scrub the venom from your system. But it never worked, his touch lingered like that of a tattoo, forever sealed onto you. You could never take back what had happened that night. 
For some reason, a small part of you doesn’t want to. 
Beomgyu avoided you, and when he wasn’t avoiding you he was glaring. His dark and piercing eyes followed your every move whenever you were in his field of vision. But there was something else too, a sense of superiority. — He knew that you were constantly dealing with the consequences of that night, he could see the way your mind haunted you with the memories, and he took pride in watching the shame and the guilt practically eat you alive. — He was on top of the world and you were scrambling to even get by. 
So one could easily imagine your surprise when one evening, you found him in a state you never thought you’d ever get to witness. 
It was late, but your small family had yet to eat dinner, and you watched as Ms Choi darted across the kitchen, in full with preparing your meal. You helped her set the table as you laughed at a couple of your dad’s terrible and overused jokes. It had taken a whole of three days for you to be able to look him in the eye after he’d come home, and you still felt terrible whenever you caught him and Ms Choi sharing a kiss; knowing that one tiny slip of your lips could manage to ruin something so perfect. 
You trusted that Beomgyu wouldn’t utter as much as a single breath about what had transpired that night, but you still startled when his mother taps your shoulder, whipping around as you come face to face with her. — “Dear, do you mind fetching Beomgyu, dinner’s almost ready”, she smiled, that warm and comforting smile she so often gave her son, only to receive a mere huff in return. You nod, slowly making your way out of the kitchen as you head for the hallway, dreading having to speak to him, much less in private. 
The steps creak under your weight as you drag yourself up the stairs, drawing out the moment for as long as possible before you inevitably reach his door. With a small sigh, you knock. There’s no music coming from the other side and you frown, what’s up with him? — Another knock, but nothing. You bite the inside of your cheek, a wave of frustration crashing over you at the thought of having to call out for him. 
“Beomgyu?” 
A third knock. You wait for at least a minute but there’s nothing, just silence. Perhaps he’d fallen asleep, still, you should wake him and let him know that dinner was ready, Ms Choi had asked you after all. — Your hand is near trembling as you grasp the handle, twisting it before pushing the door open. Slowly adjusting to the darkness of his room, you peer inside. But to your surprise, he wasn’t there. 
Your footsteps make a thumping sound as you hurry down the stairs. If he wasn’t in his room then…Your gaze flickers toward the dining room and kitchen before settling on the front door. “Did he mention anything about going out?” You call out for Ms Choi and she soon appears in the doorway, a bowl of salad in her hands. “No, is he not in his room?” She wonders, her face quickly falling. 
Noting her worried expression you quickly shake your head as you try and reassure her. “I’m sure he just went for a walk, I’ll go check.” — Your dad’s girlfriend gives a small nod as her gaze, too, flickers toward the door. “Alright..” 
⸝⸝ 
The cool night air hits your face and you mutter a few curses under your breath, scolding yourself for offering to do something like that when the last thing you wanted was to be out in this cold. — As you walk down the graveled path you let out a tired groan, what were you even thinking coming out here? It wasn’t like he was just going to magically appear or something. Fucking asshole, had the nerve to leave without a word and now you had to go looking for him. 
But as you push the small fence gate open and turn out and onto the street, a familiar scene flashes before your eyes. Nostalgia fills your every fiber as your eyes fall on Beomgyu’s figure, perched on the sidewalk as he hugs his knees to his chest, just like he had that night, that night two years ago. — But something was different. That night, the one where you had learned to hate him, it had been a warm night, and Beomgyu had been burning with rage. Today, the air is much colder, and Beomgyu is no longer on fire, instead he’s shivering, his whole body quivering as small sobs escape his soft lips.  
You freeze at the sight, breath catching in your throat as you regard his almost pathetic frame, curling in on itself as his fingers dig into the flesh of his calves. Part of you wants to leave him there, perhaps even make fun of him, it was most tempting to finally get back at him for the way he’d ruined you. — But you weren’t Beomgyu. And you wouldn’t do that. 
Instead you find yourself slowly approaching, and just like that night two years ago, you slide down next to him on the cold pavement. He doesn’t seem to register that you’re there, and you sit in silence for a brief moment before addressing him. — “Beomgyu?” — His head jerks at the quiet whisper of his name, his usually narrowed eyes wide in shock as they flicker over to you. His cheeks are wet, stained with his tears and the liner around his eyes had run down his face in messy streaks. A few strands of hair stick to his forehead and his lip trembles as he sucks in a sharp breath. 
“Leave me the fuck alone.” He croaks, but his voice comes out weak and raspy. His hands wipe at his face, but it only spreads the mess already there even further and he lets out a frustrated groan. — You don’t say anything, because last time you tried to comfort him you only ended up getting hurt. Instead your gaze flits to his discarded phone between the two of you. The screen was broken, likely from him smashing it on the asphalt beneath. You frown as it suddenly comes to life, vibrating against the hard ground. The bright screen illuminates the dim street and your eyes land on the caller-ID. 
“Dad.” 
Beomgyu doesn’t make a move to answer, merely turning his head away as he continues to sob into his arms. “Don’t”, he mutters as he sees you reaching for the device, “he’s drunk.” — You purse your lips but your fingers still clasp around the phone, your thumb swiping to decline the call. Upon being presented with his lockscreen, you can make out at least another fifteen missed ones. Your chest churns at the scene, for whatever reason, you do not know. The bright light vanishes as you power off his phone completely, tossing it to the side as you stretch your legs out in front of you on the pavement. 
It takes him about a minute to lift his head from his arms and his breath is still uneven as he speaks. “What does he want?” — Biting your lip, you gaze ahead, tracing the outlines of each car parked down the street, memorizing their plate numbers. You didn’t know how to answer his question, so you remained silent. Beomgyu shuffles next to you, mimicking your movement of unfolding his legs. “I bet he wants money..” He then adds in a snarky tone, wiping his face once more as he snivels, “money to sponsor his fucking addiction.” 
You throw a quick glance in the direction of his discarded phone. “Why do you still have his number?” It was obvious that he didn’t like his father, so why let him bother him like that. Beomgyu shakes his head solemnly, his fingers twisting against one another as he opens his mouth only to close it again. “Wouldn’t it be better to block him?” — “I can’t.” He suddenly exclaims, turning to you with a small frown. 
Why not? Why let something like that plague you, why not just cut it off, why not just let go? 
It was then you realized that perhaps you and Beomgyu shared a lot more than you’d initially wanted to admit.. Your eyes drop to the bracelet around your wrist, the silver glinting under the moon. — When your attention returns to him, you find him already watching you, his gaze following yours as it resided by the jewelry on your arm. You think he might make another comment about it, but he doesn’t, instead he merely sighs as he runs a hand through his hair. 
“I think..” You begin, your voice a quiet whisper as you stare past him, eyes drifting off into the distance as you let the words roll off your tongue. “I think you’re stuck on what could’ve been rather than what you have.” Beomgyu doesn’t say anything, his gaze mindlessly dropping to his hands in front of him as he bites the inside of his cheek. “What I have”, he mutters with a small frown, clearly not intended for you to hear but you did. 
“You have your mom.” 
He scoffs, already anticipating your next self-victimizing rant about how yours was dead. “My mom is-” 
“A wonderful person.” Your statement catches him off guard and his attention shifts back to your face as he studies you with a look of wariness. “And you would see that if you spared her more than a glare”, you continue as you watch his skeptical expression. — You had never felt anything besides hatred for Beomgyu, and you had been so blinded by your rage that in a way, you had become almost exactly like him. But as you finally take a step back to view him completely, his disheveled frame, his slumped shoulders and runny makeup — pity washes over you, the same pity you had felt on that night two years ago; the night everything went wrong. 
“Stop holding her accountable for his mistakes.” 
You can see the twitch of his face at your words, as if he wanted to refuse them, to lash out on you, but he didn’t. Instead he looks to you with the most sorrowful look you’d ever witnessed on him. — “How do I do that?” He wonders, his voice is thick, laced with his previous tears. Biting your tongue, you hold back from saying what you thought he wasn’t ready to hear but Beomgyu clings to you, his hands wrapping around the fabric of your shirt, his grip near trembling. 
“I miss my mom.” He whispers, his voice breaking as a lonesome droplet falls down his cheek, slicing through the dark smear of charcoal on his face. Your jaw falls open, stunned by the way his resolve so suddenly crumbled. And as you heard the words leave his lips, “i miss my mom”, you could practically feel every single one of his emotions as they washed over him in thunderous waves. — You missed your mom too, you missed her terribly. 
He hiccups, his tears creating a damp spot on the shoulder of your shirt. “H-How do I get her back..?” The question comes out muffled as he grips you tightly. “Please…I want my mom back.” — Your eyes sting and you feel yourself slowly losing your composure as you draw in a ragged breath. With a small push of your hands, you manage to create some distance between the two of you, enough to where you could see his wet face, his glossy eyes and swollen lips. 
“You have to let him go.” 
You reach for his phone, powering it back on. Beomgyu looks hesitant as he wipes his eyes, exhaling shakily when you extend the device to him. “The longer you let him ruin you the more you and those around you will suffer.” — With wobbly fingers he grasps his phone, slowly finding his dad’s contact info. He wavers, thumb hovering above the block button as he bites his bottom lip. 
You don’t know why you felt the need to help him, why you felt like you had to comfort him, reassure him. — “You’ve said it yourself haven’t you? Some people don’t deserve children.” His gaze flickers up to meet yours at the statement, a glimmer of recognition in his eyes. “Don’t let him have that privilege”, you say as you let your hand rest on top of his. 
Beomgyu slowly nods, reluctantly pressing the dreadful button as he erases his father from his life. He purses his lips, breathing out through his nose as he stares at the screen for a minute, as if contemplating his next move. — “He’s gone.” He finally states, the frown on his face only deepening as he swallowed thickly. 
“Sometimes it’s better that way”, you mumble, letting go of his hand as you lean back, your gaze dropping to the bracelet around your wrist. 
Your heart pounds loudly in your chest, blood rushing through your body as you reach for the small lock, carefully unclasping the piece of sacred jewelry. Beomgyu and you…You weren’t so different, you think. And if he could do something, something like that, then who says you couldn’t? 
His eyes are on you, watching intently as you with shaky hands let the bracelet fall from your skin, feeling oddly empty without it. — It feels light in your hand, and you wondered how something so significant could weigh so little. It made it easier to let go. — Beomgyu lets you grab his wrist, the frown on his face creasing further when you tie the silver around him. 
“Now she’s gone too.” 
You give him a small smile, meeting his wide eyes as they shift from the bracelet around his wrist and your relieved expression. 
It’s without thinking that you lean in, softly pressing your lips against his in a small kiss. But this time you didn’t feel guilty, nor did you feel dirty or ashamed. Instead it felt nice, it felt like closure. Letting your eyes flutter closed, feeling his warm and damp skin against your own, a stark contrast to the cold night surrounding you. Beomgyu lets you kiss him without protest and you feel the faint caress of fingers to your cheek. 
When you pull away he chases after you, only to be stopped by the palm of your hand on his chest as you shake your head. “It’s not like that. You know it too.” Your soft whisper makes his jaw clench, his fingers dropping from your face as they curl into fists. Then he nods, the corner of his lips pulling upwards, “yeah.” 
Gingerly rising to your feet, you dust some off the dirt from your jeans before your attention returns to him, still perched on the sidewalk. — Your outstretched hand is met by the raise of his eyebrow and you roll your eyes, “come on, I think there’s someone who would like to talk to you.” Beomgyu frowns but takes your hand nonetheless as he lets you pull him up. 
You walk like that, hand in hand, and it feels nice. Your heart sinks a little at the thought that it could’ve been like this from the start, had things worked out differently. But as you turn to walk through the small fence gate, and your eyes fall on Ms Choi, anxiously waiting by the front door, you find yourself smiling. And instead of grieving what you could’ve had, you would focus on what you did have. 
Beomgyu audibly swallows next to you as his gaze surveys his mother, and as Ms Choi notices the two of you approaching, her face lights up. — With a final squeeze of his hand, you let him go. It was satisfactory in itself to see him walk up to his mom, letting her wrap her arms around him for the first time in what you could only guess to be years. But they both made it look so natural as they fell into each other’s embrace. And it only confirmed what you had known for so long.
That Beomgyu was and had always been, a mommy’s boy.
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sytoran · 6 months
Text
𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐍 𝐂𝐑𝐀𝐃𝐋𝐄𝐒 || mdg pt. 5
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timelines and lifelines have torn you and natasha apart, but the two of you are bound by the child you have created. though subjected to earth, loki, god of mischief, dangles the possibility of a future with natasha by making you a god.
pairing: goddess!natasha x mortal!reader (not for long)
note: this is the 5th installment to the goddess!nat universe, as per the 4k celebration! please read the other parts first if you haven't already. this part contains depictions of violence. this series is 18+ only.
word count: 1.8k
series m.list | main m.list | AO3
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Previously…
Your relationship with the Goddess of Lust, Natasha Romanoff, comes to a screeching halt. Torn apart by timelines and lifelines, you’re not coping well, and neither is Natasha — especially when she finds out she’s pregnant with your child.
On the other side of the universe, Loki, God of Mischief, breaks into your apartment to offer you a deal. Worse still, he eats your leftover pizza.
Now…
When you come back to consciousness, you feel like you’re floating. Not in the whimsical, psychedelic cocaine-induced way, but in the Help-I’m-Physically-Suspended-In-The-Air way. 
And it is true, much to your demise, because despite the fruitful hours of work spent in the gym, your arms and back can’t quite handle the excruciating pain of being strung taut like a rope.
Against the will of every screaming cell in your existence for you to fall the fuck back asleep, you forcefully sit up and open your eyes.
It takes about two seconds for the headache-worthy hangover to sink in, and three seconds for you to regret every godforsaken decision you had made the night prior.
Last night- oh, fuck. Last Friday night. 
(No, this isn’t going to entail a radio pop song with a curly black-haired Katy Perry, because the only curly black-haired one in this story is the God of Mischief himself. Both equally as sassy, but expounding on that would fracture the entirety of the space-time continuum.)
“Oh, you’re awake.” 
Speaking of the devil (quite literally), Loki forces you to bring your blurry gaze up to the cocky expression painting his angular face.
“Fuck you,” you spit, dry and hoarse, memories surging through your teetering consciousness. All you were aware of was the mother of your problems was the man himself.
Now, you were suspended like a puppet in your very own living room, strings of golden magic encircling your body, keeping you stretched to the edge of insurmountable agony.
“Funny,” Loki says dryly, eyes raking over your pathetic form. “That’s exactly what you said last night that put you in this position.”
You would’ve laughed, truly, if not for the ache in your ribs and your back and your– you get the point. “You offered me a proposition,” you comment, licking your cracked lips with distaste. 
“And you said ‘fuck you’ and threw up three bottles worth of alcohol on my ridiculously expensive snake-scaled shoes before promptly passing out from your hissy fit of a heartbreak.”
“Deserved.”
“I will hang you upside down.”
You roll your eyes – however much you can roll them in this position. “You gave me an offer. That means that I had a say in this, and I certainly did not consent to take part in this BDSM-worthy fantasy of yours.”
Loki scoffs at this, shifting in his seat. Your seat, actually, his black robes draped over your armchair like it belonged to him. 
“My sex life is none of your business, and more than often entails men,” Loki begins, putting a finger up. “The only reason I’m taking interest in a hopelessly lovesick woman-lover is because you have something that I want.”
You exhale roughly, lungs and ribs screaming in protest. You weren’t of a godly status by any means, but based on his identity and the fact that a God was lurking around Earth, you were competent enough to figure out what he wanted.
“You wanna get back to the land of the Gods,” you state, eyes narrowing in seriousness. “Like me, you’ve done some shit that made SHIELD put a target on your back. Except it’s ten times worse, considering you’re a God. That’s why you’re here. What you want is connections, because I have – I had – a relationship with Natasha Romanoff.”
Natasha.
It pains you, to even put it in the past tense, that what you had with Natasha would only ever be history.
“Oh wow,” Loki responds, acting shocked. “There’s actually more to you than this himbo attitude you exude.”
You don’t give him the pleasure of a response to his provoking, despite your incessant need to sucker-punch that face of his. But uncovering his plan has that layer of composure slipping, for a second, and you delight in it for what it’s worth.
"Put me down first," you say instead through gritted teeth, looking up with a ferocious glint in your eyes.
"Say yes first," Loki answers promptly, folding his arms over his chest with a self-satisfied grin.
"Put me down and or I won't consider your absurd request," you try again, a wracking cough making your stomach lurch in pain.
"Funny you think you're in a position of power," the arrogant god taunts. "Who's to say I won't torture you to the brink of death until I get what I want?"
"...Who's to say I'd eventually break?" you say finally, narrowing your gaze. You sure as hell were scared as fuck, but you had to survive. "Threats only work on people who've got something to lose. I'm forbidden from ever seeing the love of my life again – I've got nothing to lose, y'know? No amount of torture will get you what you want."
Your little speech of sorts, delivered with an unwavering tone despite the pain coursing through your body, plays out perfectly. Loki's gaze is unreadable as he contemplates upon your counter-proposition.
Unceremoniously, you're dropped to the ground, hitting reality with a grunt of pain. “Shit,” you wheeze, clutching at your ribs with sore wrists. “Warn a girl, man.”
Loki waves you off dismissively. “The pain won’t matter anymore.”
“Wait,” you struggle to say, reaching out to nothingness as the man closes his eyes and raises his hands to the lands you once roamed.
It’s only then that you realise you’re surrounded by candles, so many candles. You’re in the center of some kind of ritual board, and what you assume are ‘offerings’ circle you.
From skulls to black flames, you know something is wrong. Very wrong. Loki is muttering incantations under his breath, a language beyond your human tongue, and the pressure in your room rises to an extent that forces you downwards.
“What,” you ask, exhaling roughly against your cracked ribs. “What kind of God am I going to become?”
Your question goes unanswered, lost in the swirling black flames that surround you. Loki’s eyes open again, and this time they are completely black. He begins a chant, crafted from an inhuman tongue, a language you’d never heard before.
That’s when the pain starts.
You scream, brain waves throbbing, a loud ringing sound echoing in your ears. Psychedelia takes over your conscience, producing images all around you, dark and distorted and everything you thought you’d buried.
“ибяѓюгэю юдякиэҁ, эиѫч ҩ рэд.”
Unbridled darkness, enemy of peace.
Natasha’s face is at the forefront of your mind, unblemished and happy and everything you’d ever wanted. You reach out, spluttering and breathless, trying to grasp that wistful memory like it’d materialize in front of you, like she could ever be yours.
“бцэт юҩщи ҩцядрҩи дю ғдг ҩця ҩиэҁ.”
Put down your weapons and fall to your knees.
Her face gets shattered into smithereens, scattered throughout the dark swirls of your mind, overtaken by shadows. Horrifying screams and flashes of a graveyard overwhelm you, and you yell through the misery for the love of your life.
“тҩ фэн тнэ юэҁѓяэ ҩғ џэиəэдисэ lə'”
To quench the desires of vengeance and rage.
Fury slugs through you, as you crawl away from cold hands that pull you back. “No!” You yell, but your voice is not yours anymore. The only thing to describe what you feel is chaos, darkness creeping in from the shadows, a slithering worm into your ear, a rotting carcass and the stench of carrion.
“ҩҁэ бҩиэҁ сдҁт ҩғ ҁсчнэҁ дию бдюэҁ.”
To see bones cast of scythes and blades.
The world snaps from reality, and you get flung into a different dimension. This place you’re trapped in is unfamiliar. You’re standing on a pile of dead human bodies, and there are ghouls and demons cheering your name. Blackness seeps through your veins, infiltrating your mindwires. 
“Revenge,” you spit, a devilish noise, and the cheers rise again.
You scream, as black wings tear through your back, ripping your collared shirt and spreading towards the sky. You launch from the depths of whatever hellhole that may have been, an inhuman screech echoing around the void, soaring towards the heavens in search of the one you’d lost.
“ҩѫэҩя, гдск-щѓəэю юэџѓг, эт ндҁ иғцяг”
Come forth, black-winged devil, let chaos unfurl
Upon descending on holy ground, unfamiliar faces intrude into your mind, prominent and unmistaken. Backlogged information begs its worth — God of Thunder. Goddess of Magic. God of Science. God of Justice. 
Then one word rings above all, high and mighty, and the darkness of your mind clears to reveal the people that had taken your Natasha away.
SHIELD.
“энҩгю яҩѫ нэг, ҩю ҩғнэ Циюэящҩягю.”
Behold from hell, Ruler of the Underworld.
Reality drives into your side like a thousand semi-trucks, bright and flashing, and then you’re back in your living room. You stay on the ground, all-fours, spluttering and gasping for air. 
Natasha.
Black wings flap behind you, resplendent and marvelous. Those had been real.
Arising from the ground, gone is the fear in your eyes. No more shreds of hope. No more sense of justice. Your blackened eyes burn red, searching for Loki. He stands in the corner of the room, and he seems so much smaller now, compared to you and your bloodlust.
“She was mine,” you growl, dangerously, fearsome and inhuman.
“She is yours,” The God of Mischief answers, marveling at his creation, for there was nothing that could stop you now.
***
“Rockabye baby on the treetop,” Natasha sings softly, a hand gently caressing the swell of her stomach. Colours sweep into galaxies as nightfall arrives, cloaking her land in gentle beauty.
“When the wind blows, the cradle will rock.” As if on cue, the wind gets a little chillier. Worry clouds Natasha’s face, edging in on her safe haven.
“When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall.” A holographic image of The God of Justice materializes before her eyes. It meant that it was an urgent message, from one God to the next.
“The SHIELD base is being attacked by an unknown force. We’re in grave danger,” Steve says, urgent and frantic. Screams and chaos can be heard in the background, and the God barely ducks a crashing marble pillar.
Natasha almost scoffs and switches off the image. The Gods had ignored her very existence ever since they had banished you, which was convenient in hiding her pregnancy, but at the same time rather annoying, now that they were begging for help.
That is, until Steve persisted further. “Natasha. This perpetrator has power beyond measure, dark power. It could even exceed Loki’s.”
“......What does this harbinger of hell want?” Natasha asks, steely eyes surveying her homeland.
“Natasha,” Steve repeats, weary eyes hooded with anxiety. “They’re looking for you.”
Down will come baby, cradle and fall.
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so that happened.... any thoughts about our new and improved y/n, ruler of the underworld?? loki rlly stirred up a lot of shit huh
reblog or no y/n x natasha reunion
series m.list | main m.list | AO3
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jamminvroomvroom · 6 months
Note
landoscar threesome drabble...
(or is that too much for a tuesday evening)
just a taste for now…. watch this space bc i will be writing this long form. i’m weak.
smut under the cut, 18+ minors dni!!
alcohol is… well, it’s a powerful tool.
sober you will die tomorrow when you wake up between the two mclaren drivers but that’s a problem for then.
you quickly lose track of whose hands are whose. all you know is that both of them are touching you, everywhere, and it feels fucking delicious.
lando has been waiting for this, getting his hands on his teammates wide eyed girl, and he’s going to make this last long enough that he can cling on to the memory next time he’s alone in an empty hotel room.
the power kick oscar gets beats out his sprint win in every possible way. watching lando’s pupils blow wider and wider with every piece of clothing ripped off of you makes oscar dizzy.
the aussie would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about this.
the brit would also be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about this.
and you, well, lord have mercy.
curls tickle your shoulder as lando’s tongue works over your collarbone while oscar’s fingers dip into the band of your underwear.
oscar quickly gets a finger inside of you and you slump forward into lando’s firm body.
lando makes sure you can hold yourself up - “there you go, you can do it, that’s a good fuckin’ girl” - collapsing onto his knees before you
the sight before you is sinful. or, well, it would be if you could open your tightly squeezed shut eyes.
lando’s tongue slides home between your legs, working around oscar’s relentless fingers. you’re on fucking fire. it’s almost painful, the way you teeter on the edge, achingly turned on.
your hands quickly find lando’s curls, holding yourself up while oscar stands firm behind you, unphased. he’s kissing your neck, fucking his fingers into you even faster. he groans, nice and low, every time lando’s tongue runs over his sodden fingers.
when lando latches onto your clit, sucking hard, right when oscar’s spare fingers pinch hard at your nipple, you nearly die, collapse onto the floor. two strong bodies hold you up while you cum, hard.
when the three of you tumble into bed, it’s hard to tell where oscar stops and lando begins.
it’s a long, long, long night.
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actuallysaiyan · 3 months
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The First Time(Aka How Nanami Kento Lost His Virginity)Chapter Five: Drink Water To Cry Better
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Chapter Five: Drink Water To Cry Better
warnings: mentions of alcohol, partying, slight suggestive themes, angst, bullying pairings: Emo!Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader summary: you and Kento get invited to a frat house party and he decides to take you out even though he much rather stay in. you two have been getting closer, despite your own denial about your feelings for him. during a drunken make-out session, Kento soon learns what he believes is the truth about your relationship. things are left unsaid and things are colder than ice.
taglist: @beneathstarryskies @seireiteihellbutterfly @kenpachisbrat.
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@entirelysein-e @brokennerdalert. @sugurusprettygirl
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Masterlist
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As the weeks go by, you and Kento find yourselves teetering on the edge of being in a relationship and still remaining casual. You really are falling so deeply in love with him, but you’re in denial. You try your best to remind yourself that this is just a college fling, but you wonder if maybe you could really be in a committed relationship with someone like him.
At night, you think of him. Even while in your bed alone, you cling to your pillow and wish he was here with you. In the last little bit, he’s been staying the night even though he’s not really supposed to be. You’ve dusted off your old Nintendo 64 for the two of you to play Ocarina of Time well into the wee hours of morning. If you’re not playing Legend of Zelda, you two are falling asleep to AVGN playing on your clunky laptop.
Kento has found a place in your heart, and you fear you won’t be able to let him go. You don’t want to consider him exclusive, but you are also not eager to share him with anyone else.
As the second semester comes to a close, you and Kento find yourselves invited to a party at a —---. He’s finding excuses not to go, but the minute you say you might want to go for just a bit, he sees the appeal in it.
“I think it could be fun,” you mention as you two have lunch together at your favorite cafe. “It’s a good way to unwind after exams.”
Kento nods and sips his coffee. “Yeah, I guess I never really saw it that way,”
“Will you come with me? I wouldn’t wanna go without you.”
This makes his heart flutter. Kento, on his end, has found himself completely head over heels for you. He’s gone through his denial phase a while back. He had tried his best to hide his feelings for you, but the more you two hung out, the more he found himself just hanging on to your every word. The more he would take an extra second to admire you.
And with every moment that passed between you two, he longed for the day that he could fully call you all his. He wanted to hold you in his arms, post-coitus and in that beautiful afterglow and to finally whisper those three words to you. For now though, it was just a singular fantasy. The one he imagines whenever he’s aroused and you’re not around to take care of him.
“Earth to Kento,” you wave your hand in his face.
“Yeah, sorry sorry…” he shrugs and tries to hide his blushing cheeks. “I’ll come with you if it means that much to you.”
You chuckle softly, reaching over the table to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear. Just that little touch sends shivers down his spine. He can’t quite look you in the eyes right now, and you love the way his cheeks and tops of his ears are tinged just a little pink.
“It’s tomorrow night around 9,” you mention. “I’d like for us to go together.”
The words play in his mind, even after he’s promised to come by your dorm to pick you up around 8:30. He wonders what you’ll wear. Kento’s mind is very active that night, while he lays in his bed. He holds his pillow close.
The thought of you wearing a cute dress with fishnet tights makes his heart flutter in his chest. You were that type of girl too. He sees what you wear when you’re not trying to dress business casual for class. It turns him on to see you in such alternative attire.
The next morning, you two meet up for breakfast before a short morning class. You notice how he’s in a much better mood than usual, and you wonder if maybe the promise of cutting loose for a bit is making him happy.
The night comes quickly and you’re in your dorm texting a few friends and listening to music as you get ready. You settled on a gray and black plaid skirt along with knee high red and black socks. Your shirt was a cut up Green Day shirt you had bought the last time you went to a concert. You finished up your makeup in the mirror plastered in polaroids and old pictures taken from music magazines.
There’s a knock on your door and you rush over to answer it. Your breath hitches in your throat when you see Kento standing there, a single red rose in his hands. He’s blushing as he thrusts it in your direction.
“For you.”
Your eyes widen and you smile sweetly. You gladly take it, bringing the rose up to your nose. It smells floral and lightly sweet. Then you take in the look of the man who stole your heart. Dressed in his signature black skinny jeans and ripped up Vans slip-ons, he looks so good. And you notice the new checker print hoodie he’s wearing with his thumbs poking out the holes in the sleeves.
“You look really good,” you comment. You invite him inside and he sits on your couch.
He stumbles with his words. He tells you that you look pretty, but he means you look beautiful. He wants to take you into his arms, kiss you softly and tell you not to go out tonight. You two could stay in and finally take your relationship to the next step.
“Thanks Ken! Do you want to head out now?” you ask him after touching up your makeup.
He nods. “Y-yeah. Let’s go.”
You take his hand and grab your purse before you two leave your dorm. The walk to the frat house wasn’t far, so you two had a little time alone to enjoy each other’s company. The night is so beautiful. The sun had just finished setting and the sky was getting darker. The stars would be shining soon. You felt like this was one of those nights you’d never forget.
The minute the two of you step into the frat house, you know that this party is going to be wild. Beer bottles litter the ground amongst a group of drunken college kids. You look around as you and Kento enter the house, moving around waves of bodies that are either getting drunk or dancing. You spot a group of girls in the kitchen and you notice a few of your friends within that group.
“Hey!” You wave at them. Your fingers still interlocked with Kento’s.
The girls giggle before your friends spot you and they wave you over. Kento feels nervous about this. He knows what others think of him. They all think of him as a loser, a loner and someone who doesn’t fit in. What makes him fall so deeply for you is that you see him for who he truly is.
“Hey girl, glad you made it!” One of the girls comments, her eyes darting towards Kento. “You too! Nice to see you out of class.”
Kento shrugs. “Is there a reason for us to meet like this?”
You bite your lip in an attempt to stifle your laugh. “Awh, be nice, you.”
Kento smirks when he notices how some of your friends are trying to hide their laughter too. Maybe he could truly be a part of your fold. He holds your hand a little tighter.
You two make it to the counter where a large stash of booze is displayed. Kento grabs the bottle of whiskey, pouring some into a red solo cup. He hands you one, and the two of you sip on your drinks. It’s nasty and strong, but you two long to get a little fucked up tonight.
Throughout the night, you two drink your fair share of booze. Kento keeps a tight hold on you, preventing you from stumbling over or ramming into anyone accidentally. 
And finally, the moment comes when the two of you find a room that’s unoccupied. Your mind is a hazy mix of alcohol and lust for the man who’s been glued to your side this entire night. You kiss him first; it’s sloppy and hungry. Kento follows your lead, cupping your face.
The two of you make it to the bed, and you pull him on top of you. You giggle as he groans, then he kisses you again. His tongue feels a little tied, but he wants to tell you just how much fun he’s having.
“Such a good time when I’m with you,” he slurs between kisses. “I wanna…fuck I wanna show you just how much you mean to me.”
The minute you squeeze his hardened cock through his jeans, it seems to sober him up a little. He then realizes maybe he needs to cool off before he does anything else. Kento pulls away despite your protests.
“Just gonna get us water, ‘kay? Stay here, beautiful.”
When he steps out of the room, he’s wondering if he should even be leaving you in the room like that. You’re clearly drunk and anyone could enter. He decides to make it super quick. He goes into the kitchen, quickly swiping two bottles of water before making his way to the room again.
But before he can go inside, he hears girls giggling. Kento looks over his shoulder at the group of girls that you two had been talking to earlier.
“So,” the leader starts. “You’re the virgin, huh?”
The word sounds so nasty on her tongue. Kento knows you don’t care that he’s a virgin. You’ve been so patient and sweet with him this entire time. You’ve shown him the right way to explore each other. But the way she’s saying it now, it makes him feel ashamed of being a virgin at his age.
“You really think she likes you, huh? Come on, you’re just a pity fuck.”
The words cut him deeply. “Shut up, you don’t know her.”
The girl smirks, “And you think you do? Come on, get over yourself! She’s only using you as a pity fuck…or well not even cause you’re still a virgin.”
His blood boils and his heart is in his stomach now. He thinks back on all the things you two have been through together. Would you really do that to him? He thought that you two were really becoming close and things would progress really soon.
“See ya later, you fuckin’ virgin.”
With his stomach in knots and tears of frustration in his eyes, he enters the room. There you lay, on the bed. You look so fucking beautiful and he wants nothing more than to make you his. But now, he knows that maybe he’s been nothing but a joke to you this entire time. He gives you the bottle of water.
“I won’t be bothering you again.” He states. He hates that he’s doing this, but it was to protect himself. He watches as you slowly come to terms with the words coming out of his mouth.
Your heart flutters in a panic. You sit up, but you’re so dizzy. Kento wants to help you, but he’s hurting. He doesn’t want to let this continue if all you were doing was stringing him along. 
“Just forget we ever met, okay? You and I are done. There wasn’t anything between us anyway. Just continue your perfect fucking life without me.”
You stare at him in disbelief. You swore that tonight would be the night that you two would finally go all the way. And if not, you were ready to tell him how much you loved him. You feel tears stinging your eyes.
“Kento…wait…” You cry out. He shakes his head and turns away from you.
But before you can continue, he storms out. It’s only a few minutes later that your friends come in, sitting with you and consoling you as best as they can.
Kento walks home alone, his heart pounding and his mind racing with thoughts of regrets. He just messed up the greatest thing to ever happen to him.
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formulauno98 · 28 days
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Yacht Girl Summer - Chapter Ten / Thursday Evening, Four Months Post-Break-Up - George Russell x Reader, Toto Wolff x Reader
Word Count: 5k
Warnings: Angst!!! 🌶 This one is a little spicy. 18+ only. If you're uncomfortable with the idea of two-timing don't read this.
Author’s Notes: Disclaimer, purely fiction. No use of Y/N and minimal descriptions because I want everyone/anyone to be able to enjoy this.
I'm sorry this chapter took forever to post, life got very busy and some of you may have seen that I had someone plagiarising my work on Wattpad and was NOT happy. I got it taken down and finally felt ready to finish this bad boy.
There will be one more chapter coming up shortly, aptly named Chalet Girl Winter. Hope you like it and thank you to everyone who reported the person who was stealing my work 🫶🏽
THURSDAY EVENING, FOUR MONTHS POST-BREAK-UP
George's alcohol-glazed eyes bore into yours in a way that made you almost uncomfortable. Surely he did not mean what he just said and was just drunk? Before you could determine an appropriate response, your door buzzed for the second time that evening. Your heart leapt to your throat, knowing exactly who it was. 
Toto.
“Who’s that?” asked George, his tone suspicious.
“Well…” you stumbled over your words, “I was trying to tell you. It’s Toto….”
George’s expression shifted to horror as he groaned.  “Amazing,” he muttered. “Just what I need. I’ll go, forget what I said.”
Your eyes softened, “George…” Before you could finish your sentence, the buzz came again, Toto was obviously growing impatient. “I better get that,” you said, George huffing in response.
You stood there in awkward silence, George glowering as he knew Toto was on his way up and there was no escaping seeing him. Fortunately, the pair of you didn’t stand there long before there was a knock on your door. 
Taking a deep breath, you opened it to reveal Toto standing there, handsome as ever, grinning, holding an impressive bouquet, even larger than the one George had brought.
“Hi,” he said, his smile faltering as he stepped inside and clocked George standing in the hallway behind you, "Hi George, what’s going on here?"
George turned to face Toto, his face now filled with rage, "Of course, you’re here" he spat. "You just can't stay away, can you?"
"George, calm down, Toto, come in," you said, Toto looking shocked as he stepped inside. You quickly closed the door, not wanting your neighbours to overhear the drama unfolding, stepping between the two men. 
"I don’t think you’re in a position to lecture me," George snapped, his voice rising as he stepped forward, squaring up to Toto over your shoulder. "Why do you think you can just come here and replace me? Steal my girlfriend?"
Toto, to his credit, remained calm, handing you the bouquet he’d been holding, and moving out in front of you, his hands now raised in a placating gesture as he faced the younger man. "George, I understand you're upset. But this isn’t helping anybody."
"Upset? You don’t know the half of it," George shot back. "You think you can just waltz in here with your yacht, all tall, dark and handsome and your big flowers and your charm and…"
"George," Toto interrupted, his voice firm but gentle. "Please, I didn’t come here to argue."
The tension in the hallway was palpable and you could see George's anger teetering on the edge. You stepped from behind Toto and placed your free hand on his arm, trying to soothe him. "George, please, it’s been months."
For a moment, you thought George might explode, but then he seemed to deflate, the fight going out of him. "I just... I just wanted to fix things," he mumbled.
“There’s nothing to fix,” you said, looking at the ground as you felt your eyes tearing up. “I’m sorry but I think you should go,”
George glanced back at you, his eyes filled with hurt. "I just don’t understand why things had to end this way. Why him? Of all people?"
"It’s complicated," you replied softly, your voice barely above a whisper. "We both deserve to be happy and I think we both know that it wasn’t working between us anymore."
Toto stepped forward, his voice calm and reassuring as he placed a hand on the younger man’s shoulder. "George, it's clear you still care but right now, the best thing you can do is take care of yourself."
George looked between you and Toto, his shoulders slumping. "Yeah, maybe you're right."
Toto nodded and pulled out his phone. "My driver just left, let me message him and he’ll take you home.”
“Okay.” said George, looking at you wistfully, “Can’t say I didn’t try.”
You felt a pang of guilt as you watched George shuffle towards the door as Toto typed out a text. You turned to face your former boyfriend, "George, for what it’s worth, I’m sorry. I hope you find someone who makes you happy."
He gave you a sad smile. "Yeah, me too." With a glance back towards Toto, he added, "Take care of her."
Toto nodded. "I will.”
Then, much to your surprise,  George leant in to hug the older man, perhaps a sign that the journey to forgiveness had begun. “Thanks, boss,” he said.
Toto shot you a look of shock over George’s shoulder, somewhat awkwardly patting him on the back. “I’m sorry for everything.” he said, his deep voice thick with emotion, “I really am.”
George seemed placated by Toto’s words and stepped back from the embrace, his eyes red, filled with emotions. “I appreciate that," he said quietly, casting one last look at you. "I’m sorry I interrupted your evening, I guess I should get going.”
"Don’t be silly. I know it’s weird but you’ll always be welcome here, any time," you replied softly.
“Thank you,” said George, turning to Toto. “Did you say your guy will be here soon? I can wait downstairs and be out of your way.”
“Honestly, take your time,” you said, secretly willing Toto’s driver to arrive asap. As if by magic, Toto’s phone buzzed.
“He’s downstairs,” said Toto, clearly sharing your sentiments as you exchanged a look of relief.
“Thanks, Toto.” said George, “See you guys around.”
As you murmured your goodbyes and George walked out your door, you were floored by the evening’s events. Did George really still love you or was it just the drink talking? If Toto hadn’t come over, what would have happened?
Your mind was racing as you closed the door behind him and Toto immediately pulled you into a comforting embrace, his strong arms enveloping you, putting your mind at ease.
"Are you okay?" he asked softly, brushing a stray strand of hair from your face.
You nodded, feeling the weight of the evening slowly lifting. "I am now. Thank you. I’m sorry about that, it’s not been easy. I bumped into George when I was out earlier and I guess he hit the pub afterwards."
Toto gently rubbed your lower back, soothing your concerns, "No need to apologise, it’s not your fault. I think unfortunately this was always going to happen. He has been behaving strangely with me all season.”
“How come you never said anything?” you asked, leaning into Toto’s chest, “It’s less than ideal.”
“Life is often less than ideal. But we deal with it and move on.” Toto said, pressing a kiss to to top of your head, “How about we get some food and relax? We can take your mind off things."
"That sounds perfect," you replied, “And thank you for these, they’re beautiful,” you added, holding up the huge bouquet Toto had handed to you. 
Toto’s goofy grin had returned, “Beautiful flowers for a beautiful woman. Although I did picture myself giving them to you in different circumstances.”
You laughed as you made your way through to the kitchen to find a vase for them, gesturing for Toto to follow. “You mean to say that you didn’t envisage my ex being here?”
Toto laughed in return, “Not exactly, I can’t blame the guy though. I wouldn’t want to lose you.”
Surprised by Toto’s admission you stopped in your tracks, “Well don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”
Toto quirked an eyebrow as you set about arranging both his bouquets and the roses from George in two vases, struggling to fit them in.
“Did George bring you those?” asked Toto, sidling up to the kitchen island.
“Yep,” you said, feeling slightly guilty, “I don’t want to waste them.”
“Of course,” said Toto, smirking slightly as he clocked how much larger his bouquet was.
“Sorry, I’m being the worst hostess, I got some wine out and then George completely distracted me. Would you like some?” you asked, suddenly flustered by Toto’s presence in your kitchen.
“Relax,” said Toto, stepping nearer to you, reaching around to hold your hip from behind as you arranged the flowers, kissing your neck softly, “I will pour us the wine.”
Melting into the tall Austrian, you finished arranging the flowers and turned to face him, “Sorry, I let the stress get to me. I was kind of surprised when you said you were nearby and then George coming over completely blindsided me.”
“Don’t be silly and stop saying sorry” Toto said, gently caressing the side of your face, “I should be one saying sorry if I took you by surprise. I wanted to see you. I had planned to take you out to dinner but maybe a quiet night in is better tonight?”
“A quiet night sounds wonderful,” you said, stretching up to kiss him, finally starting to calm down from your stressful altercation. It was amazing how quickly you had started to feel comfortable with Toto.
“So this is where you live?” asked Toto, pulling away and starting to take in his surroundings for the first time. Your apartment was small but cosy and somehow Toto’s tall frame looked larger than life in the tight space of your kitchen, almost as if he didn’t belong.
“Yes,” you said, feeling awkward as Toto surveyed your domain. “My home for the last four years. I know it’s nothing compared to your yacht even but…”
Toto quickly interrupted you, leaning over to kiss you once more before pouring out two generous glasses of wine. “Stop it. This place is perfect. It’s you and that’s what makes it perfect.”
You chuckled, knowing he was being polite and was used to much grander surroundings, "Thanks. I’ve tried my best!"
Toto finished pouring and handed a glass to you. "To a quiet night in," he toasted, clinking his glass with yours, his eyes crinkling warmly as he smiled at you.
"To a quiet night in," you echoed, taking a sip and feeling the tension of the evening finally begin to melt away.
FRIDAY MORNING
As your eyes fluttered open, crisp Winter sunlight started to spill through the curtains and you were finally content. Toto had kept a firm grip around your waist all night and waking up in his strong arms was bliss. You could feel the gentle rise and fall of his chest pressed up against your back as he slept peacefully.
Having ordered dinner in, spent far too long carefully selecting a film to watch together and then watched it for all of ten minutes before you were all over each other, your quiet night in had taken a wilder turn. Having only had the one time with him on the yacht, you hadn’t known what to expect but Toto had more than delivered. You were sore in the way that you only felt after a night spent fucking, enjoying each other’s company and letting loose for the first time in what felt like forever.
Basking in the post-sex glow, you snuggled closer into Toto before you dropped back off to sleep, knowing that you didn’t have any commitments for the day and could enjoy a lie-in.
– – – 
Rousing from your sleep for the second time that morning, this time was different. Your bed was cold, there was no strong arm cuddling you, Toto was nowhere to be seen and your heart dropped. You hadn’t discussed whether he would stay the night but to wake up and find him missing was somewhat disheartening. Perhaps you’d gotten the wrong idea? Cara and Marion’s words of warning swam around in your head, leaving you wondering.
That was until you heard a clatter coming from the kitchen. Easing yourself out of bed, you fetched your bathrobe, slipped it on and made your way to the source of the noise.
“Morning!” said Toto brightly, turning to face you. He was wearing nothing but boxers and a copious dusting of what looked to be flour.
“Good morning,” you said sleepily, making your way over to him, realising what he was doing. He was making pancake batter. You were floored, in what world does a man who has staff to do everything he could ever dream of wake up and start making pancakes? “This looks interesting.”
Toto looked a little sheepish, bending down to kiss you, coating you with a light sprinkle of flour. “Sorry for the mess, I thought I would surprise you with breakfast in bed and clean up without you seeing.”
“Oh my goodness,” you said, “Don’t worry about that!” You smiled widely at your beau, “I thought you’d left, I’m just happy to see you.”
“Why would I leave?” asked Toto, quirking an eyebrow, “I am not working today, I thought I told you.”
Casting your mind back to the previous night, you suddenly recalled him saying something about having Friday free - you were an idiot for thinking otherwise. “Sorry, my bad,” you said, coming closer to him, placing a hand on his hip as you surveyed the carnage that was your worktop. He’d taken the bowl off of your Kitchenaid but managed to coat most of the worktop and himself in flour. “Have you made pancakes before?”
“Have I made pancakes before?” Toto repeated back to you, aghast, “Who do you think I am? A heathen?”
“Well, it’s not like you were making pancakes every day on the yacht…” you replied sheepishly, hoping he wasn’t insulted.
“That was my holiday, I’m not cooking on holiday, especially not for six guests,” said Toto grinning, “Now that you’re up I can ask, do you want tea or coffee? I know you drink both.”
Grinning that he remembered this small detail, you replied, “Maybe coffee this morning, something kept me awake all night.”
Smirking, Toto turned around to face you, “Sounds like a fun night…”
Returning his look, you leaned up once more to catch his lips with yours, “Indeed it was.”
“Well there’s more where that came from,”  said Toto boldly, his hands starting to caress your hips as he gazed down at you.
“That’s good to hear,” you said, sliding a hand under the waistband of his boxers, stroking his bare hip idly. 
“We have time later, let me finish breakfast, go back to bed and I’ll bring it to you,” said Toto, taking your wandering hand in his.
“No, I can help, honestly,” you said, “How about I make the coffee?”
“Ok.” said Toto, pressing a kiss to your hand before dropping it, “Deal.”
SUNDAY AFTERNOON
By the time Toto had left, he’d spent the best part of the weekend with you, only having left your side to go and grab some fresh clothes, not having planned to stay over. You’d spent a good part of the weekend in bed, making the most of your time together before Toto had to leave for the final race of the season in Abu Dhabi.
Aside from the obvious, you’d also spent time getting to know each other better, exchanging stories about your childhoods, your crazy family members, not to mention your hopes and dreams. Toto was a good listener and you were pleasantly surprised that he even remembered things you’d told him when you’d first gone to explore the cove and sat by the waterfall. 
Life could be strange and surprising sometimes and Toto was certainly turning out to be a man full of surprises. If you could have time-travelled back to the days of you sitting patiently in the garage watching George drive around, your past self would have baulked at the idea that you’d now be so close to his intimidating Team Principal who had never even looked twice at you. You knew that you would never have believed it but stranger things had happened.
SUNDAY AFTERNOON, ONE WEEK LATER
The following weekend you settled down on your sofa, a glass of wine and snacks in hand, to watch the final race of the season. The Abu Dhabi Grand Prix. Granted, your situation was an odd one, rooting for your ex-boyfriend’s team because your current not-quite boyfriend owned and ran it was a somewhat unusual predicament but you wanted to see how they got on. 
Mercedes weren’t fighting for a driver’s championship but could still do well in the constructors and were competing against Ferrari for second place, something you knew that Toto wanted desperately. It meant more to the team collectively and more to the shareholders.
You’d promised him you’d be watching as you’d waved him off so true to your word, you settled down to watch. As the camera panned around you kept an eye out eagerly for any glimpse of Toto. Searching hungrily for that famous white shirt or tousled dark hair. You knew that the cameras often liked to linger during races as he was particularly emotional for a Team Principal so it would only be a matter of time before he was shown. 
Sure enough, the race had only been running for a few laps when George made a particularly impressive overtake and Toto was shown enthusiastically celebrating. Butterflies started as you took in his dimpled grin, quickly turning to nausea as the camera panned out to show him wrapping his arm around a willowy blonde on his left-hand side. She was statuesque, beautiful and all too close to the man who’d recently stolen your heart. Tears started to form as you saw him flash a handsome smile at her which she returned, leaning into him, their heads close as his hand lingered on her waist.
You were devastated. Of course, Cara and Marion had warned you about Toto’s playboy tendencies but you naively had believed that Toto was not seeing anyone else. How could you have been so foolish? He was just using you and going home to a model-like blonde. In a fit of rage, you turned the TV off. This was clearly your karma for what you had done to George.
– – – 
Having turned your attention to cleaning your flat for the rest of the afternoon, you spent the next few hours dwelling on the cosy image that was now burned into your mind and were livid by the time your phone rang. 
Toto. The name flashed on the screen as you swiped to decline the call. A few minutes later and he rang once more.
By the end of the afternoon you had six missed calls from Toto so after you’d checked where Mercedes had finished (you were relieved to see they had come second in constructors- you weren’t completely heartless after all), you turned your phone off. 
You didn’t want to talk to Toto, you didn’t want to see him. He’d lived up to his reputation and you felt like a fool. What was he playing at, flaunting another woman on screen when he knew you’d be watching? You briefly considered sending a message to Cara as you knew she was at the race and would suitably berate Toto for his cruel behaviour, but you decided against it. It was time to take the high road and ignore him. He was probably out celebrating with the mystery woman anyway.
You didn’t sleep that night, restlessly tossing and turning as the mental picture of Toto’s hand on another woman’s waist lingered in your mind. You knew it was incredibly hypocritical considering the circumstances that you’d gotten together but you were floored by the cruelty of which he’d flaunted another woman when he knew you’d be watching. It was sick and twisted and you were upset at yourself for being so stupid.
MONDAY MORNING
Finally having dropped off the sleep, you were rudely awoken by the buzzer of your door. You groaned as you woke up, your eyes puffy from a night spent crying. It was still dark and checking the time on your clock, you saw it was five o’clock in the morning. There were only two people in the world who would have the audacity to wake you at this hour and you groaned once more, not wanting to see either of them.
The intercom buzzed once again, whoever it was growing impatient. Getting out of bed, you padded along to the hallway to answer the door.
“Hello, can I help you?” you said wearily, the annoyance clear in your tone.
“Is everything okay?” came a deep, heavily accented voice over the speaker. Fuck, it was Toto. Although you hadn’t wanted to see George, he was easier to deal with and get rid of.
“You tell me,” you said indignantly, yawning.
“Can I come up?” asked Toto, “I am sorry if I woke you, I was worried when I didn’t hear from you.”
Knowing the man as you did, you knew he was persistent so reluctantly you pushed the key button and answered tetchily, “Sure, come up.”
“Have…” Toto began answering but you cut off the intercom, waiting to see how he’d explain himself face-to-face.
Knowing he was on his way up, you steeled yourself and hurriedly tried to flatten your bed hair in the hallway mirror as you caught sight of yourself looking like a wreck. You were fighting a losing battle but didn’t have time to do more as a knock landed on your door.
Cracking the door open you were surprised to see that Toto was still wearing his work uniform, he must have come straight from Abu Dhabi. He looked equally as shattered as you felt and it somehow comforted you to know that Mr Perfect was not always so. His normally pristine white shirt was rumpled and his hair was nothing short of a complete mess.
“Thank goodness,” he said, pushing the door wider and coming towards you, trying to pull you into an embrace.
“Why?” you said, annoyed at his pretences and turning away from his arms.
Looking hurt at your rejection, his brow furrowed, “I thought something bad had happened. I was trying to call and it kept not working, I couldn’t leave a voicemail. I came straight from the track.” He gestured down at his clothes, “Is everything okay?”
It was your turn to furrow your brow, annoyed that he was not catching on. “No. It’s not. Why would you tell me to watch the race and then do what you did? Rub it in my face.”
“Huh?” he asked, running his hand through his hair as he often did when he was nervous. It was a tick that you’d noticed. “What do you mean? What did I do?”
“Wow.” you said, “The camera panned to you… and your girlfriend.”
“Huh?” he said, still confused. “What girlfriend?”
“The tall blonde you were draping yourself all over. Rub it in my face why don’t you…” 
Toto cut you off, “My sister?”
Floored by this, your face dropped. “Your sister?”
“Yes my sister,” said Toto, his expression darkening as he realised what you were accusing him of.
An awkward silence crept in and you were not sure how to respond. In hindsight, you had been quick to jump to conclusions. Perhaps driven by guilt over the way you’d handled things with George, you jumped to think the worst of Toto.
“This is why you ignored my calls?” asked Toto, looking thunderous, “Because you thought my sister was my girlfriend?”
Feeling smaller by the minute you shrunk back towards the wall, “I suppose.” you mumbed, “Look, I’m sorry, I leapt to conclusions.”
“You could say that,” said Toto, folding his arms, “I was worried about you, I thought something bad had happened and all this time you were sitting there thinking the worst of me?" His voice was thick with disbelief. "You didn't think to ask me before shutting me out?". His dark eyes bore into yours and you could feel the weight of your accusation.
You swallowed hard, the realization of your mistake sinking in like a stone. "I’m sorry," you said, "It’s just that… I’ve been burned before and I guess I panicked."
Toto's expression softened, his anger giving way to concern as he stepped closer. "I understand that you're scared, but I’m not George, and I'm certainly not the kind of man who would play games with you. I’m insulted that you would think I would do something like that."
You winced at his words, the guilt gnawing at you. “I just… I didn’t know what to think. It all felt too good to be true."
Toto sighed, reaching out to cup your face in his hands, his touch gentle despite the tension in the air. "I’m not perfect, but I’m not going to lie to you. If I ever make you feel uncomfortable or unsure, I want you to tell me, be direct."
Feeling like a fool, you felt tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. "Direct, I can do that," you whispered, your voice cracking, leaning into his touch. “Why did you come back? You should be out celebrating!”
A small, relieved smile tugged at the corners of his lips as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "So you did watch the race?" he murmured, his lips lingering against your skin. "Because I care about you, more than you know."
You looked up at him, your heart swelling, "Of course I did, I care more than you know too," you admitted.
Toto's smile grew and he leaned down to capture your lips in a slow, reassuring kiss. The tension between you melted away as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer. The kiss deepened and when you finally pulled away, breathless and flushed, Toto looked at you with a mischievous glint in his eye. "You know," he said, his voice low and husky, "there’s a way we could put this little, let’s say, misunderstanding behind us."
You raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "Oh? And what might that be?"
He grinned, a wicked smile that sent a shiver of anticipation down your spine. "I have some ideas.”
You nodded eagerly, all thoughts of your earlier insecurities forgotten as he swept you off your feet and carried you to the bedroom.
– – – 
Later that morning, as you lay tangled in the sheets, your head resting on Toto’s bare chest, he broke the comfortable silence. "You know," he began, his voice a soothing rumble beneath you, "I have been thinking. How would you feel about coming skiing with me next week? I have a chalet and I always invite people at the beginning of the Winter break."
You looked up at him, enchanted by the thought of a snowy getaway. "That sounds amazing," you said, smiling. "But… when you say people, who do you mean?"
Toto hesitated for a moment, his expression thoughtful. "Well, normally friends from the team. James, John, some of the other engineers. George also mentioned that he might be free… I thought I’d ask if you would be okay with him joining us."
The mention of George sent a ripple of unease through you, but you quickly pushed it aside. If Toto was willing to include him, it was only fair for you to try to be okay with it too. "I suppose," you said cautiously. "I’ll drop him a text and see how he feels about it. If it’s easier just take him this time."
Toto nodded, "That’s fair."
"I’ll text him now and see what he says," you said, grabbing your phone from the nightstand and typing out a quick message, asking how he felt about the idea. To your surprise, his reply came almost instantly.
Yeah, that's fine. Toto asked me the other day. I'll be bringing someone too, so it should be fun.
You stared at the message, your heart sinking slightly. George bringing someone else was entirely reasonable, but it still stung more than you cared to admit. He’d been busy declaring his love for you just one week ago and now he was bringing someone for a weekend away?
"Is everything okay?" Toto asked, noticing the change in your expression.
You nodded, though the feeling lingered. "Yeah, he said it's fine. He's bringing someone too."
Toto's eyes softened as he sighed, "I know. He already asked me. Are you sure you're okay with that?"
"Yes, just a little surprised after his outburst the other week," you said, still wondering what that had been about if he was already seeing someone new.
“I was too.” said Toto, his brow furrowed, “But I know him, he overthinks, it will be good for him.”
At that, you managed a small smile. "I think it will be good for all of us. It's time to start new chapters, right?"
Toto studied your face for a moment, then nodded, pulling you close again. "Agreed," he said, kissing the top of your head.
FRIDAY MORNING, ONE WEEK LATER
The week leading up to your ski trip had flown by and anxiety lingered at the back of your mind. Trying to take the high road once more, you kept reminding yourself of the progress you'd made. George’s last drunken visit had given you a strange sense of closure and Toto’s less than happy reaction towards your unwarranted accusations had reassured you that he was somewhat of a realist. A few days away should do you all the world of good.
As you found yourself in a sleek black car with Toto on the way to the airport, the scenery blurring by, your thoughts drifted to the upcoming weekend. The air between you and Toto was comfortable, though the unspoken tension of the past week still hovered.
Toto reached over, squeezing your hand as if sensing your unease. "We'll have a great time," he said, his voice filled with a quiet confidence that made you believe him.
You smiled, squeezing his hand back. "I know we will."
Taglist: @prettiest-at-the-party @noooway555 @annewithaneofthegreengable  @xoscar03 @totowolfffcheco @justzluv @kravitzwhore @bborra @a-beaverhausen@amandadesantasworld @formulaal
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bradshawsweetheart · 11 months
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Good Vibrations | Jake Seresin x Reader |
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SUMMARY: Making a bet with Jake Seresin never involved low stakes. This time, after losing to your boyfriend, his "winnings" included you testing out a new sex toy he picked up — not only in public, but in a last minute decision of in the presence of both strangers and your friends. Surely you could be discreet. This would be a cakewalk... Right? WORD COUNT: ~3.08K WARNINGS: THIS BLOG IS 18+ SO JUST ASSUME ANYTHING GOES. MINORS DNI. Swearing, alcohol mention (no one is drunk but worth mentioning), smut, softdom Jake, voyeurism, exhibitionism, edging, oral (f receiving), fingering, praise kink, dumbification (affectionate), Jake being a smug bastard. A/N: I wrote this for this request I received a while back! I hope you enjoy!
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“A bet is a bet, darlin’. I don’t make the rules.” Jake smirked. You tried your best to convince him to save his little game for another time, but he wasn’t budging. At all.
“Yeah, a bet we made before agreeing to go to the bowling alley with Bob and Phoenix. And actually, yes, you did make the rules.” You whined as you gripped his hand tighter, forcing a smile on your face as the two of you approached the small table that the pilot and WSO were waiting at.
After a few rounds passed, Bob and Natasha were absolutely destroying you in duos. 
“I thought you were good at this game, Bagman?” Natasha quipped tauntingly after Bob rolled yet another perfect strike. He now had a turkey when neither of you had gotten anything better than a spare during the entire game. You were getting absolutely creamed; it was embarrassing. Yet somehow, contrary to any kind of normalcy, neither of you seemed to care. “You talk a lot of game for someone who’s losing by an embarrassing amount already.”
“Yeah, yeah. You’re lucky my mind is elsewhere tonight or else you’d both be going home cryin’ to mama.” Jake chuckled before he dug a couple of shiny quarters from his pocket and bounced over to the jukebox. How he managed to be so cocky while actively losing was beyond you – any other time, he would be sore about it for two weeks minimum. Natasha raised a brow at you, amused, and you returned a playful eyeroll.
“I’ve never known you to focus on anything other than winning, so I’m calling bullshit.” Bob scoffed before offering a lopsided smile to meet your sheepish gaze. 
You watched Jake curiously as he seemed to be intently searching for a specific song, and not long after, The Beach Boys’s Good Vibrations started to bump throughout the half-empty, neon-lit bowling alley. Your face fell when he swaggered back to the table with a shit-eating grin plastered on his face. You thought that maybe he had forgotten about your arrangement until you felt the cool metal of the tiny remote being lightly dragged up your bare thigh under the table when he sat back down. You shuddered before sending him a warning glare. Natasha expertly sent her ball down the lane, and as soon as it collided with the pins, a powerful vibration from inside your underwear sent electricity through your core. You lurched forward and a guttural groan flew from your mouth before you could stop it. Bob whipped his head around to face you, concern evident on his face.
I’m pickin’ up good vibrations
She’s giving me excitations
“Are you alright?” Bob asked, reaching a comforting hand toward you. 
Jake quickly wrapped an arm around you and pulled you, along with your stool, closer to his side. His touch was the only one you would know when you were turned on, and he was not about to let another man put his hands on you while you were already teetering on the edge of euphoria. You began to scramble for a response as Jake upped the strength of the vibrations by one level.
“Y-Yeah, I’m okay. Just – just bummed for you that it wasn’t a strike. Phoenix, your form was per… perfect.” You stammered; your knuckles turned white as you tightened your grip on the edge of your chair. Jake shoved a fistful of nachos in his mouth to hide his smirk, which earned a suspicious look from Bob.
“Ugh, I know. I got the next one, though.” Natasha chirped at your compliment with a confident wink before turning on her heel to retrieve the ball to roll for a spare. 
Jake brought his hand to rest on your bare thigh and began rubbing circles on your skin with his calloused thumb. The combination of the vibrations and just this simple contact from his hand was giving you goosebumps. You adjusted your position on the uncomfortably hard plastic of your chair.
“You okay, sugar?” Jake asked innocently. You shot daggers at him. The corner of his lips quirked upward.
When I look in her eyes
She goes with me to a blossom world
“Just peachy.” You replied curtly, exhaling slowly through your nose. 
His pinky slowly trailed further up your thigh until it was brushing along the edge of your skirt, his middle and ring fingers teasingly pushing up and down between the plush of your thighs. You pressed your legs tighter together to halt his cruel teasing as he smugly watched your eyebrows furrow. You tried to keep your breathing even as you watched Bob and Natasha, who were thankfully too lost in their climb to victory to notice what a menace Jake was being.
I don’t know where but she sends me there
(Oh, my-my, what a sensation)
“You’re up,” Bob nodded to Jake. Jake was quick to pull away from you as he popped up and strode over to take position. He kept one hand in his pocket as he eyed the lane and readjusted his aim a couple of times. “One-handed in a way that you couldn’t care less. What, d’you give up already?” Bob teased. Despite him being on the opposite team, you loved when Bob would start to smack-talk after a few beers. He really came out of his shell whenever it was time for a little friendly competition.
“This is how a real pro operates, kiddo. Take notes.” Jake responded without breaking his focused gaze on the pins.
“Yeah, let’s see how far that gets you.” 
And with that, Jake took his shot and rolled a perfect strike; and in doing so, he upped the vibration strength in his pocket the moment the ball collided with the pins yet again. A higher pitched moan left you and you did your absolute best to disguise it as a celebratory cheer. You were relieved when it seemed to pay off. Bob’s jaw was slack as he marveled at Jake’s shot.
“That’s how the adults play, Baby On Board,” Jake chided as he made his way back to his seat next to you. Bob rolled his shoulders back with a grimace as he muttered to himself. 
Gotta keep those lovin' good vibrations a-happenin' with her
“You’re up, chickadee.” He grinned at you, subtly adjusting his jeans to conceal his growing erection as he watched your face. Your eyelids were struggling to remain open as the sensations took hold over you. The mischievous glint in his eye was as prominent as it ever could be. You narrowed your eyes at him as you stood, a little unsteady on your feet as the vibrations against your increasingly dripping core remained constant. You pick up your ball from the rack and move to take position. Your senses were overwhelmed as the consequence of Jake’s winnings kept at your clit; everything was suddenly too loud, the entire joint smelled overwhelmingly like beer and fried food, and now you were squinting against the pink and blue of the neon that was reflecting off the recently waxed wood. You took a deep breath and aimed your ball before sending it flying down the lane. You thought that now that you were front and center, with everyone’s eyes on you, you would be safe from Jake’s antics. You thought wrong.
(Ahhhhh!)
Your ball sped toward the pins and collided, successfully knocking them all down and earning yourself a perfect strike – your first of the night. 
Good, good, good, good vibrations
The biggest grin found its place on your face and just as you jumped up to celebrate, you fell to your knees with a high pitched whine as Jake upped the intensity by several levels. Bob flew out of his chair to kneel beside you, placing his hand on your arm as you trembled, your head bowed to the floor. Jake’s skin burned as he watched Bob’s hand on your skin, but he let it slide. This was his doing, after all. Jake stood from his chair and was behind you immediately as he turned the toy off with the remote in his pocket. You bit your lip to conceal your pathetic whimper at the sudden loss of stimulation.
“Are you okay? What happened?” Natasha questioned in a rush as she dropped her knees to the floor beside you.
Good, good, good, good vibrations
“I’m okay,” you reassured them, exhaling slowly and keeping your voice steady. You couldn’t do this much longer. The desperation for relief was overwhelming you. “It’s just really hot in here. I think I just need to splash some water on my face.” Natasha glanced down at her jacket – she was freezing, even with the alcohol in her system – but she nodded nonetheless.
“Do you want me to go with you?” She offered, standing slowly and steadying you against her elbow as she pulled you up with her. She searched your face with genuine concern. It kind of made you want to elbow Jake in the ribs for making your friends think there was something seriously wrong with your health at the moment. You flicked your eyes back over your shoulder to meet Jake’s — you could tell he was struggling to keep a straight face at this point. His lips quirked as he watched you, bringing a firm hand to rest at the small of your back and teasingly rubbing underneath your shirt with his thumb. Your breath hitched. You shook your head rapidly at Natasha’s offer and waved her off, offering an appreciative smile. Jake’s features were only half-apologetic as he pulled you against him and leaned down to give a chaste kiss to your forehead. You playfully sighed in annoyance at him. You agreed to his terms when you made the bet. You just didn’t think he would be so remorseless in his use of the new toy in public. 
Bob shifted anxiously on his feet as he observed you, subtly bopping his head to You Dropped A Bomb On Me by The Gap Band that was now playing on the jukebox. You bopped your head in time with him with a small smile and watched him visibly relax.
“It’s just hot in here. I’ll be much better when I come back.” You reassured them again as the trio watched cautiously. Jake’s eyebrow quirked as you passed him. He knew what your plan entailed and he wasn’t too thrilled about it.
You hurried to the bathroom, quickly locking yourself into one of the stalls and leaned back against the cool metal of the door. You bit your lip to keep yourself quiet as you dipped your hand into your underwear, desperate for relief and suppressing a moan when your fingers ghosted over your sensitive clit. You didn’t even bother to check if the bathroom was empty – frankly, you were too on edge to care. After a few minutes, Jake excused himself to go check on you. He looked both ways before practically flinging himself into the women’s restroom and closing the door behind him hastily.
“What’s got you so worked up, baby?” Jake drawled after making sure it was just the two of you in the room. You whimpered at him quietly. He took a moment — finally alone — to adjust his pants more openly and palm over his hardening cock. He took notice of your feet under the stall door and imagined the way you were positioned. He pictured your brows knit, bottom lip between your teeth as you ran your fingers through your folds and desperately grinding down onto your hand for relief. He was painfully hard just at the thought of it. Jake locked the bathroom door behind him — whoever might have needed to come in here could wait. 
At the click of the lock, you were out of the stall and on him in a flash, desperately pulling him against you and attaching your lips to his. He grinned into the kiss as your lips moved feverishly together. He secured one hand against the back of your neck and his other on your hip as he walked you backward until your ass was hitting the counter. You sighed into his mouth, running your hands down the front of his torso and pushing your hands under his shirt. His skin was hot to the touch and you wanted nothing more than for it to be against yours. You gently raked your nails down his abdomen and pulled his hips closer to yours by his belt loops. He hummed. “You’re breaking the rules.”
“Don’t care,” You took his bottom lip between your teeth and tugged gently, whimpering when he lifted you enough to position you on the very edge of the sink. “Need you.”
“Need me, huh?” Jake teased, leaving your swollen, kiss-bitten lips and attaching his own to that sweet spot under your ear. He pushed your legs further apart with his knee before slotting his thigh between yours. “You wanna be a good girl and hike up your skirt for me?”
You whined pathetically at his words as you pulled at your skirt and ground your heat onto his thick, denim-clad thigh. He continued to leave a trail of hot, opened-mouth kisses down your neck and chest before yanking your top down to attach his lips to your already-peaked nipple. He took his hand from the back of your neck to knead at your other breast, pinching your nipple between his index and middle fingers. You sucked in a sharp breath and threw your head back with a moan, grinding down onto him a bit harder. He grinned against your skin as he quickly flicked over your nipple with his tongue before switching to the other.
“I got you, pretty girl,” Jake cooed, snaking the hand that was firmly secured against your hip to the apex of your thighs. He moaned lowly at the feeling of your wetness-soaked underwear, slowly rubbing small circles over the fabric. It wasn’t enough. You whimpered, grinding into his hand and digging your nails into his biceps. “So wet for me. You been thinking about me touching you all night with that vibrator against your cunt?” You could do nothing but nod weakly, your head resting back against the bathroom mirror. “Use your words, darlin’.”
“Yes sir,” You mewled. 
“Good girl,” Jake grunted, flicking your nipple with his tongue once more before releasing it with a pop! He dropped to his knees and pulled your panties to the side, wasting no time in spreading you with his fingers and licking a thick stripe upward before plunging his tongue into your weeping hole. “Weren’t exactly trying to hide how good I was making you feel, were you, baby?”
“Oh, my fucking –” You jolted. Jake attached his lips to your clit, alternating between licking and sucking as he brought his middle finger to push into you slowly, gliding in and out of you with ease. Your fingers wound into his blond tresses and you eagerly tugged at his scalp, earning a pleased, guttural groan from somewhere deep in Jake’s sternum. You were already so close after being practically edged all night long.
He pulled your thighs over his shoulders before pushing his ring finger into you now, curling his digits upward against that spongy spot in your walls and pumping them into you at a steady pace. You let out a long, high pitched whine as he hit the perfect spot over and over and over and over. He moaned and relished in the feeling of your heat clenching snugly around his digits. Your brain turned into mush – you heard his voice but couldn’t make out what he was saying. “I – I’m – Jake, I can’t –”
“You sound so pretty when you moan for me, baby,” He smirked against your skin as he watched your fucked-out expression. Your eyes screwed shut with your eyebrows sloped and your mouth agape – it always drove him crazy. “What, can’t take any more? Forgot how to use your words now?” You could do nothing but cry out and nod rapidly against the mirror. “My poor baby. Taking my mouth and fingers like such a good girl.” He hummed against your clit and you choked out a sob, tears streaking your cheeks now and desperately grasping his hair. You were so, so close, teetering on the edge and waiting for him to push you over like he always does… Then, suddenly, he withdrew from you completely. Your eyes flew open, wild, and searched his smug face while he lazily kissed your inner thighs.
“What are you –”
“You broke the rules.” He stated simply, pulling your skirt back down over your thighs and smoothing it over with his calloused fingertips.
“What?” You exhaled incredulously, blinking at him, chest heaving. He rose to his feet and kissed your collarbones as he readjusted your shirt over your breasts before wiping his chin.
“You broke the rules,” Jake repeated. His eyes were dark with want yet held an incredibly amused glint. “No touching yourself.” Your jaw fell slack as you searched his features for the hint of a joke – there was none.
“Jake –” You began to protest – to plead.
“Come on, baby,” He grinned, pulling you down from the counter and spinning your hips to stand in front of him to face the mirror. You could still do nothing but blink dumbly at his reflection. He brought his hot lips down to where neck meets shoulder as he ground his hard cock against your ass. You whimpered, reaching for him behind you. He stepped out of reach and grabbed your hand instead, interlocking your fingers. He adjusted himself by tucking his solid length into the waistband of his jeans. “We have a game to get back to.”
You couldn’t believe this was happening.
“You’re finished when we get back to your place.” You hissed at Jake lowly through gritted teeth as he unlocked the door and pulled you back into the bowling alley with him. He ignored the glances you two were getting from a few lingering patrons as he strode back toward Bob and Natasha. The music was loud, but maybe not loud enough to conceal what was happening behind the locked door from anyone within ten feet of it.
“Not if I finish you first,” He challenged with a grin. He fished the remote from his pocket and dangled it in front of your face. “If you can even make it that long.”
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rispwr · 1 month
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Still with you - JK - MDNI - PART ONE
pairings : ex!jk x ex!reader
genre : fluff, angst
context : after breaking up with your boyfriend for 14 years for cheating on you, choosing to still stay with him in his apartment wasn't quite the best idea. especially after seperating.
warnings/contents : smut, mentions of ppregnancy, cheating, rape, unprotected sex, alcoholism, degrading, and this jungkook should be a warning.
songs : house of balloons, swim, into it, goodluck, babe, so high, bloodline
this fic only has maybe 2 or 3 chapters
I wake up on the couch, feeling the ache in my back from sleeping in the same uncomfortable position all night.
 It takes a moment for everything to come rushing back—the familiar smell of his apartment, the soft hum of the refrigerator, and the memory of why I'm here in the first place.
I sit up slowly, wincing as I push the blanket off me. My clothes from yesterday are wrinkled, sticking to my skin in all the wrong places. I hate that I’m still here, stuck in this stupid situation, relying on him of all people. I run a hand through my tangled hair and look around, trying to remind myself that this is temporary. Just a month. I can survive a month.
The bedroom door creaks open, and I stiffen. Of course, he’s awake. Jungkook steps out, looking annoyingly casual in his sweatpants and t-shirt, his hair all messy like he just rolled out of bed. He sees me and flashes that stupid smile, the one that used to make my heart skip a beat. Now, it just makes me want to throw something.
"Morning," he says, his voice soft.
I don’t respond, refusing to meet his eyes as I start folding the blanket. Each movement is sharp, almost aggressive. I focus on the fabric in my hands, trying to keep my thoughts from spiraling. Why does he have to act like everything’s fine? Like he didn’t just cheat on me?
Jungkook walks past me to the kitchen, humming some tune under his breath. I hear the coffee maker sputter to life, and the smell of brewing coffee fills the room. It’s almost enough to calm me down. Almost.
"if you're still not over about that babe-" before he could utter a word, i cut him off " don't call me babe."
I grit my teeth and ignore him, the anger simmering just below the surface. The blanket finally folded, I toss it onto the couch with a little too much force and cross my arms, glaring at his back. He’s acting like nothing’s wrong, like he didn’t break my heart just a few weeks ago.
"I wouldn’t have to sleep on the couch if I didn’t have to be here in the first place," I mutter under my breath, knowing he’ll hear.
Jungkook pauses, glancing back at me. He leans against the counter, crossing his arms like this is just another one of our casual conversations. Like we’re still friends or something.
"You know you’re welcome to stay here as long as you need," he says, his tone irritatingly calm. "I don’t mind."
That’s not the point, Jungkook. I wouldn’t need to stay here if you hadn’t fucked up and cheat on me like i was nothing.
I stop myself before I go down that road again. We’ve been over this too many times, and it never ends well. I bite my lip, turning away from him and grabbing my phone from the coffee table. I need to get out of here. Anywhere but here.
"I’ll be out of your hair soon enough," I say, more to myself than to him.
I can feel his eyes on me, that gentle concern that used to make me feel safe but now just makes me feel...trapped. I don’t look back at him as I head to the bathroom, needing a moment alone to pull myself together.
i went to the bathroom
I close the bathroom door behind me, leaning against it as I let out a shaky breath. 
My heart’s still pounding, adrenaline making my hands tremble slightly. It’s always like this.
 being around Jungkook is like walking on a tightrope, and I’m constantly teetering on the edge. I can’t even look at him without feeling that mix of anger and something else I don’t want to name.
I turn to the mirror, avoiding my own reflection for a moment as I focus on the running water, splashing some on my face. The coolness helps, grounding me a little.
 My fingers shake as I comb through my hair, trying to smooth out the mess that sleeping on the couch always leaves behind. It’s not like I’m trying to impress anyone, but I can’t stand looking as disheveled as I feel inside.
Why does he have to be so calm?
 So unaffected by everything?
 It’s like nothing phases him, like he doesn’t care that I’m practically bursting with everything I haven’t said.
 I clench my teeth, rubbing at the dark circles under my eyes. I haven’t been sleeping well. how could I, in this situation?
I need to get out of here.
 I can’t stand being in this apartment any longer, can’t handle the way it makes me feel trapped. I don’t even know where I’m going, but anywhere is better than here.
 I grab my toothbrush, quickly brushing my teeth as if it’ll help me escape faster, then run a hand through my hair again, tying it up in a loose ponytail. It’s the best I can do with the time and patience I have.
The moment I step out of the bathroom, I feel the weight of the apartment pressing down on me again. Jungkook’s still in the kitchen, probably drinking his coffee without a care in the world.
 I grab my bag from the couch, trying to be quiet about it, but the strap catches on the blanket, making me fumble. My breath catches as I hear him shift in the kitchen, like he’s going to say something, but I’m out the door before he gets the chance.
The cool air hits my skin as I walk into the coffee shop, offering a welcome escape from the heat outside. I’ve been coming here a lot lately. maybe too much. but it’s one of the few places where I can just...breathe. 
No drama
no tension
no jeon jungkook
just the comforting smell of coffee and a quiet corner to lose myself in.
As I approach the counter, I notice a new barista. He’s got dark hair that falls over his eyes, giving him a kind of laid-back vibe that instantly catches my attention.
 There’s something about him that seems...different. He’s not just going through the motions like most baristas.
 He’s calm, almost serene
as if he’s moving at his own pace, completely unaffected by the rush of the city outside.
I find myself lingering a little longer than usual, trying to read the chalkboard menu even though I already know what I’m going to order. When I finally step up to the counter, he looks up at me, his eyes meeting mine with a gentle curiosity.
“Hey, what can I get you?” His voice is smooth, a little deeper, and I can’t help but notice the way his lips curve into a small, almost shy smile.
“Just a latte, please,” I reply. There’s a warmth in his gaze that I can’t quite place, something that makes me feel like he actually cares about what I’m going to order. 
It’s silly, but it’s nice.
He nods, turning to start on my drink, and I watch as he moves with an effortless grace, like he’s done this a million times but still finds some sort of joy in it. 
There’s a quiet confidence about him that’s both intriguing and comforting.
As he works, I find myself leaning against the counter, feeling more at relax than I have in days. “You’re new here, right? I haven’t seen you around before.”
“Yeah, just started a couple of weeks ago,” he replies without looking up, focused on the precise art of frothing the milk. “Name’s Yoongi.”
“Y/N,” I say, offering a small smile, even though he can’t see it. “I come here a lot, so...guess I’ll be seeing you around.”
He glances up at that, his eyes meeting mine again, and this time, there’s a flicker of something. more of a spark of interest that makes my heart skip a beat.
 “I’ll look forward to it.”
My smile widens a little, and I duck my head, feeling a blush creep up my cheeks. There’s something about him that’s just...easy. Natural. Like we’re already friends, even though we’ve barely exchanged a few words.
He finishes my latte and slides the cup across the counter with a soft “Here you go.”
 I take it, our fingers interact for the briefest moment, and I swear I feel a tiny jolt of electricity at the contact.
Maybe it’s just the caffeine deprivation, but I can’t shake the feeling that this guy—Yoongi—might be exactly what I need right now.
“Thanks,” I murmur, taking a sip. It’s perfect, just the right amount of foam, the espresso rich and smooth. I glance back at him, and he’s watching me with a quiet smile, like he’s pleased that I like it.
“See you around, Y/N,” he says as I turn to leave, his voice lingering in the air even after I’ve stepped away from the counter.
I find my usual spot by the window, sinking into the plush chair with a contented sigh. 
There’s something about that new barista that makes me want to come back here, even more than I already do.
 It’s not just the coffee, although that’s definitely a bonus.
 It’s him. 
the way he made me feel like I wasn’t just another customer, like maybe I was someone worth getting to know.
As I sip my latte, I catch myself smiling, a real, genuine smile that I haven’t felt in a while.
 Maybe things aren’t so bad. Maybe, in this little coffee shop with its warm light and soft music, I’ve found something, or someone...worth sticking around for.
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seconds-over-first · 5 months
Text
some chaotic rambling—hear me out
unedited | sfw | “Caught in the doorway” | Masterlist
Language not censored (blink and you’ll miss it)
Mentions of alcohol consumption/drunkenness
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Beginning/pre-stages of ghoap x reader where Soap, one night whilst the group was all out at a bar after returning from the most recent mission, had let slip a comment about returning to “‘ma belove’ Bonnie.” A partner that the sergeant hadn’t brought up having until now, mind you!
Ghost, in his mind, almost wants to feel betrayed. Why hadn’t he—his Johnny—mentioned having a partner waitin’ up at home for him until now? Was the relationship new? Long-standing? Were they thinking of a future together? Marriage? Children??? Y’know, the circle of self-doubt absolutely followed.
Did his Johnny see him as nothing more than just a teammate? A friend from work? How did Johnny describe him to this partner of his? Did they even know what Johnny did for a living? Did Johnny even tell them about him? 100%. All day every day. Wonderful Lieutenant Simon Riley. His Ghost. His Simon. But he doesn’t know this, obv.
So, Simon decides to go ahead and be a good mate, and see to it that Johnny gets home. Safely. As soon as the door is open, though, after a moment of Johnny fumbling for his keys, his back is against the wall in the foyer. Simon pinning him back, knee between his legs.
Johnny’s stunned, though he’s not exactly pushing Simon away here. The lieutenant’s lips ghosting (heh) his own, his heated breath bathing his skin with warmth. There’s a still pause—a silent tension between both men.
Simon can’t bring himself to lean in. Johnny had just such the happiest, drunken smile on his lips when he mentioned his partner. As badly as he wants to, and as deeply he feels the desire burning in his bones, he can’t. Despite every fibre of his being burning and fighting to comply with his desires, his head, hazy as it was, screamed. …But he can’t exactly bring himself to pull away, either. Neither could Johnny, it seemed. Teetering on an edge of bated breath, and flushed cheeks. Looking up at Simon with every bit of heat mirrored right back at him.
Your footsteps echo in the foyer—your form highlighted by the light of the kitchen. You looked up at the scene in curiosity, before the sight truly hit you. To Simon’s great surprise…you weren’t upset. If anything, you seemed…well, to put it simply, you seemed almost nonchalant about the scene.
The true shock for both men comes when you finally speak, after several long seconds of evaluation on your part. Rubbing your eyes with a yawn, as you turn away, flipping off the kitchen light as you leave.
“…Guest bedroom’s down the hall. I won’t have you two shagging in my bed. ‘Bout damn time you two got this over with, anyways…”
Johnny, for the sake of perhaps his own appearance, blushes harder than Simon had ever seen on a person. Meanwhile, Simon himself can’t help but feel…intrigued.
Maybe Johnny’s Bonnie ain’t so bad after all.
204 notes · View notes
macbethsymphony · 4 months
Note
CHARLOU!!! BB!!! ily so much! oh my gosh you're the freaking best spoiling me like that! Should be freaking illegal! Can I request one more? Only when you have time! But that discussion we had about Buggy has been living rent free in my mind. Fuck! Pretty please~ I LOVE YOU!!!!
-M✨
Mille!!! bb!! You know damn well that it was already half-written. It's been living rent-free in my mind too hun hahahaha (I recommend the Jack Sparrow theme as you read it) Love you too, you horndog <3
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In Search of Shanks
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Buggy x Fem!Reader
wc: 2.9k
warnings: NSFW, 18+, MDNI, rough sex, drunk sex, slight alcohol abuse, there's no plot people... it's just smut
Summary: While traveling through the grand line in search of Red-haired Shanks you encounter Buggy the Clown... and things ensue OR you fuck the clown
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You were already wasted as you stumbled into the fourth bar of your night. No one knew shit. The bastard’s location still remained a fucking mystery. 
“Hi there,” you drawled at the bartender as you slumped none so elegantly down on the standing stool. “Know anything about the whereabouts of Red-haired Shanks?”
The bartender glanced at you, raising an eyebrow as he wiped down a glass. “Shanks, huh?” he repeated with a bemused smile. “Been a while since I’ve seen him.” He leaned forward as he continued. “No idea where he went though, lass. Anything to drink?”
You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “Figures. The bastard’s slippery as fuck.” You fumbled in your coin pouch, slamming a few berries on the counter with a bit more force than necessary. “Whatever’s cheapest please.” 
The bartender chuckled and poured you a mug of something that smelled like it could strip paint. You took a long swig, wincing as the harsh liquid burned its way down your throat. 
You turned around, squinting your eyes as you struggled to put into focus your surroundings. This was a sketchy establishment. Musty and falling apart at the seams. Just like you. Your gaze landed on something red, slightly gleaming in the shitty flickering lamplight. 
Red nose.
A red fucking nose, huh? What a weird fellow. 
Wait.
A red nose should remind you of something. Right! Your mind distantly placed it. Some tall tales recounted around a campfire about being part of Gold Roger’s crew. 
Fucking hell.
Lady Luck worked in strange ways. 
“Hey! You! Big red nose!” you shouted, pointing unsteadily in his direction.
The men around him stopped whatever they’d been doing, freezing in place as the man in question slowly turned to you. 
“What d’ya say?” Buggy the Clown’s voice was precariously calm as his eyes met yours.
You teetered on the edge of your stool, attempted to stand up, the world tilting a little, then slumped back down. “You heard me, red nose. I need to know something.”
“Red nose!” he screeched dangerously, stomping to you, fury evident in his gaze. 
You snorted at the display. What was his problem? Men were always so sensitive, you just stated the obvious.
“What about my nose?” he demanded, eyes blazing, a knife finding itself to your throat in a very clear threat. 
You met his glare defiantly. He had pretty eyes, now that you could see him up close. Actually, if you got past the nose and the makeup, he was quite handsome. Was that his hair coming through his hat? You rather liked long hair. More to pull and grab. Your stare danced down. Good build too. 
You smirked, cocking your head and leaning slightly into the knife. You felt it slice through skin a little. “Careful there, clown.” Your tongue passed your lips, your hand going to the blade, tips of your fingers tracing the steel slowly as you continued. “I might be into that, you know?” you giggled. “But you know Shanks, right? You’re Binky, right?… no was it Baggy… Ah! Booggy!! Ehe, nailed it,” he frowned, destabilized by your drunken train of thoughts. “Anyways, any idea where that red-haired bastard might be?”
Buggy’s eyes narrowed, the blade pressing just a bit more firmly against your neck. It was more of an ego thing now than a threat, though you could clearly see the confusion and irritation in his gaze.  “It’s Buggy, you half-wit,” he growled.
You felt a familiar heat pool at your core at the way his voice shrieked… or maybe it was the degradation paired with the knife at your throat… Or a mix of it all. Either way, it made you smile and lean further into the act. To your satisfaction, he seemed to distantly catch your train of thought.
He took a step closer, making you lean against the bar, your back arching under him. “And why should I tell you anything about Shanks?” his breath brushed against your lips.
You snorted, his question unfortunately bringing you back out to reality. “Why, pretty boy?” Your mouth twisted as you slowly removed the blade out of his hand. “Cause the bastard knocked my sister up and left without saying shit.”
The words hung between you for a while. You could see the wheels turning in his mind, working. Then his expression shifted. Disbelief. Amusement. 
He laughed. 
“Shanks has a kid?” he bellowed and you sighed downing the god-awful booze in your cup.
“Five fucking years old, still hasn’t shown back up and not answering letters,” you added, rolling your eyes. “You guys were in Roger’s crew together, right? You MUST have an idea where he is.”
The echo of his laughter dimmed. He crashed on the stool next to yours, hearty chuckles still shaking his shoulders. “No fucking idea, woman,” he gestured at the bartender to get you new booze. 
You slumped down defeated. “More slippery than an eel in fucking oil,” you complained under your breath. A tankard appeared in front of you. You eyed it dubiously, then eyed the clown. “You better be paying, pretty boy,” you said before taking a gulp. It was far better than whatever you’d been drinking before. “Cause I’m flat-out broke.” 
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Your head hurt. Hurt so fucking bad. You could hear the rhythm of your heart in your ears. You creaked your eyes open, soft rays of sunshine an insult to your very being. You pulled the covers against yourself, fabric dragging along bare skin. Wait. Was that a bed? It was a nice bed. You hadn’t slept in one so comfortable in ages. You caught something blue in the periphery of your vision.
Ah right. The clown.
You looked at him for a bit, sleeping soundly, long hair splattered around him, the sheets barely hiding his naked frame.
Damn, you’d been right. He was a pretty boy. 
You tried to get up, but slumped back down just as fast, your body feeling like lead.
Fuck.
Most of the past night was a mystery to you. Though it didn’t take more than adding two and two together to figure out what you’d done with the clown. 
Fuck, you could still feel him a little. Though your thighs were clean. Surprisingly gentlemanly. You chuckled softly. Must have been a good lay, shame you didn’t remember.
You spotted a half-empty bottle of booze lying on the floor. You shifted over lazily, tips of your fingers grazing the cool glass before they finally wrapped around it. Expertly you untwisted the cap, bringing the alcohol to your lips. 
You smirked. Shit was good quality. Couldn’t be hungover if you were drunk. 
You closed your eyes with a satisfied exhale, images slowly coming back to you. 
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You’d been talking and laughing for a while now. Your conversation had shifted to a more secluded corner of the shabby establishment. You were straddling him as he recounted another unbelievable story, his hand detached as he waved it around, punctuating his words. 
You giggled a little, eyes stuck on his lips, not following a single one of his words. Then your mind started going down the slippery slope of the possibilities of his devil fruit powers. You put your palm on his chest, steadying yourself as you looked into the sea of his eyes.
“Say,” you mused drunkenly. “Buggy,” you uttered his name wantonly, dragging it emphatically through your lips, leaning near, breath mingling with his as he slowly stopped talking. “Can you detach, like, everything?”
Your lips almost touched, his gaze sparkled with amusement. 
“Everything,” he confirmed your thoughts, inching a little closer. With a flick of his wrist, his hand reattached itself, going to your thigh, traveling up to your ass then to your lower back, slipping under the hem of your shirt as he found his way to your waist.
You let out a small whine as ideas crossed your mind. You smirked as you asked, “Have you ever, like, detached your head to suck yourself?” He chuckled nervously but before he could say anything you continued. “Cause, if it were me,” you moaned, low, pressing yourself against him shamelessly. “I think I’d eat myself out every day.” You rolled your hips. “Fuck, the possibilities.” 
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You cringed as the memories of your drunken boldness flooded back. You shouldn’t be surprised, you guessed. It was far from unusual from you, and it clearly wasn’t your worst blunder. 
He shifted a little next to you, slowly coming back to the land of the living.
You took another sip, the burn down your throat feeling heavenly.
“Mornin’, pretty boy,” you rasped as his eyes creaked open.
He just groaned.
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He’d brought you back to his ship, both giggling as you drunkenly tumbled down the cobblestone path. You’d almost fallen off the gangplank as you made your way to the gaudy swaying deck.
As you entered his quarters, his lips found yours, hungry and demanding. Red lipstick and day-old makeup smeared across your face as your tongues met. His body pressed yours against the door, hands not wasting time as he undid your pants. 
The kiss broke for an instant as you took off your shirt. Mouths crashing again as soon as the fabric passed your head. Your fingers bunched desperately into his coat before tugging it off with urgency. Your hands traced up his arms, finding muscles you hadn’t entirely expected. 
“Buggy,” you moaned into him, a sound muffled against his lips. His hand detached, buried itself in your underwear. 
You bucked as the tips of his fingers found the bundle of nerves in small circles. Your nails dug into sinews as you struggled to keep upright. His body leaned further into you, a grounding weight. You felt fingers tangle in your hair, pulling your head back as he trailed down your jaw, the hollow of your throat.
“Shit, you’re wet. Wanna hear you,” he murmured against your ear, tongue meeting your lobe, teeth nibbling. 
He pressed a touch harder on your clit and you mewled and swore under your breath for him. Then you felt two of his fingers detach and enter you, lazily pumping in and out. 
Oh fuck. That wasn’t fair. 
Your hands shot to his head, tossing the hat away as your fingers sought to tangle themselves in his locks. Long blue strands cascaded around his shoulders and your nails found his scalp, digging almost painfully,
He moaned in tandem with you at the sensation, hips rolling against yours, making the palm at your cunt drag harder against your clit. “Gonna cum,” you warned in a high-pitched voice you barely recognized. 
Your walls twitched against his fingers as you came undone. He didn’t stop as you rode your high, dancing ridiculously close to the line of overstimulation. As your body slumped, relying entirely on him to hold you upright, digits snapped together, hand slowly retreating before going back at his wrist. 
“Fucking hell,” you panted, guiding his head back to yours, lips meeting leisurely. You went to the front of his pants, palming him. “Take me to bed, you pretty pirate captain.”
He chuckled, lust in his eyes. “Say that again.” He grabbed your ass roughly, pulling you up and you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist. 
“What part?” You licked his lower lip, hands lacing around his neck for support as he made his way to the bed. “Pretty?” You kissed his jaw. “Pirate?” Your teeth dragged on his neck. “Or? Captain?” you whispered in his ear.
He rolled his hips at the last one, the sound of pleasure escaping his mouth obscene. He unceremoniously dropped you down on the mattress, bouncing for an instant. You quickly kicked your boots and removed your pants off, panties and bra following suit, thrown into oblivion. 
He started doing the same, shirt discarded but before he could unlace his pants you grabbed his hand, pulling him to you. He stumbled down, your bodies colliding, long hair draping around you as he kissed you. 
With a quick movement, you flipped the both of you, straddling him. “You still got those knives, captain?” you asked, grinding yourself on his hips, leaving a wet spot on his pants. “I want you to hold one to my neck as I fuck you.” 
He grinned and you suddenly felt cool steel at your neck. “Fucking stunning.” He bucked under you.
You swore as you realized the hand holding the knife was floating, your head lulled back, a needy mewl escaping you. This shit was hot. You quickly made works of the laces of his pants, pulling out his cock.
He was already hard for you, leaking. You traced along him, touch fleeting until you reached the tip, your grip tightening, thumb swiping the bead of precum, gathering it. You brought back your fingers to your mouth, licking them clean, the taste salty on your tongue as you slowly started lowering yourself on him. His hand shot to your hip, fingers digging into the softness of your flesh as he tried to steady himself.
A loud moan escaped him, his back arching, breathing uneven as you took him fully. “Fucking warm and tight,” his voice was shaky. 
You didn’t waste time, lazily making your way up and down his cock. The stretch was heavenly. You grabbed his hand at your hip and brought it to your chest. You rolled your hips and his fingers pinched and squeezed for you. 
“Fuck, Captain,” you gasped. You went to your clit, fingers expertly circling, matching the movements of your rhythm. You purposely leaned into the blade and you felt blood trickle down your neck. “Fuck.” Your thighs trembled.  
“Shit, woman,” he grunted, hips rising to meet yours. “Who knew you’d be such a whore.” Your walls twitched and you stuttered at his words. He smirked. “You like that? Whore?” he punctuated his question with an especially forceful thrust, fingers pinching hard on your nipple.
“Yes!” you cried out, desperately chasing your high. “Oh gods, yes.”
“That’s right.” he started thrusting into you more steadily, making up for your weakening thighs. 
One of your hands shot to the hand holding the knife at your throat as you came, holding the blade more firmly against your, your body spasming and folding in pleasure. 
You distantly heard him chuckle at the sight. Then you felt yourself be turned around completely, your face burying itself in the linen covers, his cock somehow still pumping into you in the exchange of positions. 
The pace he set was hard, fast, rough, just how you liked it. You felt fingers burying themselves in your hair, pulling painfully, then pushing you harshly into the mattress. A staggered scream of pleasure escaped your mouth, drool seeping into the loose weave of the fabric.
Your thighs shook violently, threatening to collapse as overstimulation bordered the edge of your mind. Your fingers tangled in the covers. His hand came to your clit in small flicks. It sent your world careening. You couldn’t breathe properly. You felt threads snap beneath the force of your nails. 
“Shit, never asked your name,” The rhythm of his hips was becoming more frazzled, urgent. The hand in your hair pulled you up a bit to hear your answer.
“(Y/n),” you moaned again and again, punctuated by incomprehensible swears.
He chuckled. Your name rolled on his lips. It sounded nice. “Pretty name,” he mused, pushing your head back in the covers roughly. “Fuck,” his fingers circled harder against your clit and tears stained linen along your drool. “Sail with me, (y/n).” 
You were too far gone to answer him properly, a second orgasm tingling at the tips of your fingers. “Yes!” you agreed mindlessly, toes curling.
The world disappeared around you as you came, shockwaves of pleasure coursing through you. “Fuck,” you sobbed as your body tried to retract from the stimulation of his touch.
It didn’t take long for him to join you in rapture, suddenly pulling out of you, thrusting against your ass, hot seed spilling along your lower back.
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“Mind if I smoke?” you asked as you unsteadily made your way to your pants, discarded on the floor next to a small window. You felt his stare on your naked figure as you bent down shamelessly, looking into your pockets for your lighter and your pack of cigarettes.
“Ya can do whatever you want, woman,” he groaned behind you, his voice still thick with sleep.
You chuckled, bringing one to your lips and lighting it without much thought. You closed your eyes for a moment, relishing the exhilaration that came with the smoke filling your lungs. Your eyes creaked open again, only now noticing the unending expanse of blue in the horizon.
Ahhhhh.
Fuck.
You’d set sail.
You sighed. Didn’t matter.
You took another puff of smoke, turning back to the bed.
“Soooo,” you drawled out the word, the mattress dipping under your weight. You ungracefully made your way to the pirate, straddling him, bottle of booze in one hand, cigarette hanging from your lips. “Captain.” You rolled your hips against him, feeling heat pooling between your thighs as your oversensitive clit caught on his hardening cock. You exhaled, smoke coming out in a hypnotizing pattern. “How about we have some fun.”
He smirked.
Masterlist
129 notes · View notes
corruptedcaps · 8 months
Text
Inner Demons
Special thanks to @lsat (discord: thedivergence, Twitter: LSAT1886) for providing the idea and the images used here.
In the quiet corridors of Saint Agnes Convent, Mother Superior Mary Catherine moved with grace, her silver hair framing a face etched with kindness and wisdom. Her gentle presence enveloped the nuns in a soothing aura of compassion. With each step, the creaking floorboards bore witness to decades of devotion.
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Mother Mary Catherine's care extended beyond the spiritual realm; she knew the name and story of every sister under her watch. Her wrinkled hands crafted remedies for ailments, and her warm smile healed wounded spirits. In the convent's courtyard, where roses bloomed in vibrant hues, she often gathered the sisters for moments of shared laughter and reflection.
The tranquility of Saint Agnes Convent was soon interrupted when a bus rolled into the quiet convent, carrying a group of new sisters. Mother Mary Catherine stood at the gates ready to meet her new flock but in particular was interested to meet one new member in particular.
Kat stepped off the bus and immediately lit up a cigarette. Her purple hair and leather jacket standing out amongst the crowd of pious women ready to start their new life devoted to god. By comparison Kat looked like she wanted to be anywhere else but then again the judge had given her the choice between the convent or jail and she had picked the habit over the prison jumpsuit but she was immediately starting to regret her choice.
Mother Superior locked her eyes on the young delinquent and walked over to her with an open mind and an open heart. Kat had just taken a long drag of her cigarette when she turned and accidentally blew the exhaled smoke in the Mother Superior’s face. Rather than apologize she instead laughed.
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“Grey smoke, I guess that means there’s a new pope… or does that mean there’s isn’t? Whatever, which way to my room?” Kat said with a smirk. Mother superior stood in frozen shock at the young woman’s blatant disrespect. So much so that Kat eventually rolled her eyes and walked away to find her room.
As the days unfolded at Saint Agnes Convent, Kat's rebellious spirit began to infect her fellow newcomers. The once-pious group found themselves drawn to her edgy charm and the allure of more free wheeling spirit that seemed to exude from her. Within a week Kay had a small but growing group of followers who seemed to be less interested in their religious duties by the second.
The Mother Superior tried her best to bite her tongue and put their changing attitudes down to nervousness. She had hoped it would all settle itself soon enough but this hopeful thought was shattered as Mother Mary Catherine stumbled upon a scene that tested the limits of her patience.
In the dim moonlight, she discovered Kat and a group of sisters stumbling back into the sacred grounds, laughter echoing in the hallowed corridors. The scent of alcohol lingered, staining the air with a discordant note of rebellion.
Mother Mary Catherine's eyes widened in disbelief as she witnessed the blatant disregard for the convent's sanctity.
“Ladies! This is simply unacceptable! This is no way future servants of god to be acting!” She said letting her anger rise for the first time in a decade.
“Oh shut up you old crone! The only person I serve is myself.” Kat giggled drunkenly, with her cohort joining in with the laughter as they stumbled off to their rooms.
Tears welled in Mother Mary Catherine's eyes as she struggled to comprehend the unraveling of the sacred haven she had devoted her life to. In the face of this final straw, she grappled with the challenge of restoring order to a sisterhood now teetering on the edge of chaos.
Determined to salvage the sanctity of her order and the souls of all the girls infected by Kat, Mother Mary Catherine knew she had to do something extreme.
With unwavering conviction, Mother Mary Catherine headed to the library and entered a room she alone had the key too. It was a room she had swore to never set in foot to but desperate times called for desperate measures.
Scanning the arcane tomes in the private room, she finally found the book she was looking for. Pulling it off the shelf she had a moment of pause as she read its cover. It’s Latin roughly translating to ‘Witches Handbook’. All the books in here were vile and evil tomes that the church had collected over the centuries.
Flipping the pages she found what she was looking for. Demonic exorcism. She knew that Kat had a poison in her that needed to be removed and while it wasn’t demonic in nature, she was sure this spell would work to exorcise Kat’s ‘inner’ demons.
As if to solidify her resolve, Mother Mary Catherine suddenly heard the cackling laughter of Kat coming from her bed chambers. It was almost taunting the Mother Superior whose gentle features grimaced at the sound and ended her conflicted mind.
After an hour of waiting for the cruel laughter to die down, Mother Mary Catherine made her way across the solemn hush of the convent to Kat’s room. Creeping in she was relieved to find that Kat was passed out.
The Mother Superior commenced the unorthodox exorcism over Kat’s unconscious form, her words resonating with an ancient power. As she uttered the sacred verses, a tangible shift occurred—the air thickened with an eerie energy, and a vibrant purple cloud materialized, swirling around Kat’s inebriated body.
Mother Mary Catherine's eyes widened in astonishment as the ethereal mist, laden with the essence of Kat's rebellious spirit, rose from her mouth. The bed chambers seemed to pulse with an otherworldly force. Yet, to her shock, the amorphous cloud didn't dissipate into the air; instead, it surged toward Mother Mary Catherine, quick as a gust of wind.
Before she could react, the purple mist enveloped her, winding its way into her mouth. A moment of eerie silence settled over the room, broken only by the distant echoes of the town. Mother Mary Catherine stood, breathless, her eyes reflecting a mix of surprise and uncertainty. Before she could wonder what had happened Kat began to stir so she made her way quickly out.
By the time the Mother Superior had made it back to her bed, she was exhausted. She barely made it to her mattress before collapsing into a deep sleep. In the stillness of the night, Mother Mary Catherine drifted into an unsettling dream. The sacred confines of the convent transformed into a surreal landscape, where she encountered a distorted version of herself. In the dream, she stood tall, her demeanor starkly different—purple hair cascading down her shoulders, clad in tight leather that whispered of unstoppable power.
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The dream cast her as a strict disciplinarian, a figure she scarcely recognized. Her eyes, usually wellsprings of compassion, held an unyielding authority that seemed to clash with the gentle guidance she had embodied for decades. As the dream unfolded, she found herself enforcing rules with an iron fist, a stark departure from the nurturing spirit that had defined her tenure as Mother Superior.
Most startling however was how she punished those who stepped out of line. She would pull off their habits and flog them for the whole convent to see. She would clamp their nipples, bind their limbs, and hit them with a leather whip. However the victim would seem to enjoy it, pleading with the Mother Superior to punish them further.
Before she could continue though, the Mother Superior found herself waking to the sounds of the convent’s cock, welcoming everyone to a new day. She jolted awake to find her undergarments soaked. Embarrassed she quickly undressed and got into a fresh outfit and took a moment to compose herself in the mirror.
She scarcely used the mirror and so didn’t notice that a lot of her wrinkles had seemed to have faded. Her silver hair was darker now, her liver spots had faded and her lips plump and full. She hadn’t even noticed that she had unconsciously picked out one of her older habits, one that teased cleavage.
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However Mary Catherine took little notice of the change, save for an absentminded thought of how good she looked. That thought was quickly dispelled as she left her room and spotted Kat across the courtyard. Memories of last night flooded back into Mary Catherine’s mind of the exorcism and the wicked dream she had after. She was so preoccupied with it that she didn’t watch where she was going and bumped into one of the sisters, Sister Helen.
“Oh I’m so sorry Sister Mary Catherine, I didn’t see you there.” The sister said apologetically.
“You fool! Watch where you are going! And call me by my title!” Mary Catherine said, snapping at the girl uncharacteristically.
“I-I’m very sorry Sis- I mean Mother Superior. It won’t happen again.” Sister Helen said almost trembling and Mary Catherine could feel her panties begin to get wet at the sight.
“See that it doesn’t.” She said peering down at the girl with an intense stare. The nun quickly averted her gaze and left. Mary Catherine meanwhile felt a smirk cross her lips. She had never demanded such respect before, it felt intoxicating. She felt like she could boss anyone around, as was her right, and she knew who to start with.
Strolling over to Kat surrounded by her makeshift gang, Mary Catherine took the cigarette from the leather clad brat and stamped it on the ground.
“What the hell!” Kat cried.
“You and your little cohort here are going to scrub every floor of this place starting right now, understand?” Mary Catherine said looming over the pack, the majority of which fled. Kat and a few others remained, unwavering in their defiance and yet Mary Catherine could see something in Kat’s eyes, a crack in her armor.
“As if. Come on girls.” Kat said standing up and walking away obstinately with her friends in tow. Mary Catherine was angered but knew that something had happened last night, that Kat had lost some of her power. She also knew that she absorbed that power and so it as clear what she had to do next.
This time Mary Catherine did not creep into Kat’s room, but strolled in confidently. She was certain Kat would be passed out like last night because she had seen the young hellion sneak into the chapel and take the communion wine. Mary Catherine could have stopped her but knew letting Kat take it would only be to her advantage.
Standing over Kat, the Mother superior did not hesitate as she had done before and in fact positioned herself closer to the sleeping brat to absorb her essence quicker. Speaking the words aloud, Mary Catherine opened her mouth wide after her final word and tasted the sweet purple wisps as they slid down her throat.
Where the previous changes happened over night, new changes happened instantaneously to Mary Catherine’s body, spurred on by her own want. The last of her wrinkles disappeared as her skin grew soft and taut. Her hair lost all of its grey returning to her natural black but with stops of purple too and her breasts were now close to spilling out of her habit.
Her mind meanwhile never felt better, never felt more free. Kat’s rebellious and selfish mind was overriding most of the remaining kind thoughts that the Mother Superior had left.
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Licking her lips she looked down at Kat with increasing disdain. She also revelled in seeing Kat’s younger good looks fade as her own appearance started to improve. Strolling over to the mirror Mary Catherine smirked at her new appearance but also at the feeling of strength she now felt coursing through her body.
“Mmmm yessss Kat’s strong resolve is much more suited in my body. It’s clear now that I was too weak before, too much of a pushover. With Kat’s attitude flowing through me I’ll finally have the respect I deserve.” Mary Catherine mused to herself in the mirror.
But something was seeming off about her whole look. Her old habit mixed with her now more youthful body made her appearance somewhat comical. She needed something more fitting her body. That’s when she spotted Kat’s ajar suitcase.
Opening it up hungrily, Mary Catherine was delighted to see such wickedly tight outfits inside. She ran her fingers over their shiny surface, imagining her new younger body slipping inside. Underneath the clothes were an assortment of sex toys and aids, including a leather whip.
The word whip repeated in her mind and made her remember her salacious dream from the previous night. Her pussy started to get wet at the thought of it. Her eyes wandered over to Kat’s sleeping body and she couldn’t help imagining the bitch strung up with a ball gag in her mouth. The Mother Superior had to drag herself out of the room for fear she might make her dream a reality, but she felt compelled to take the bag. That’s when she ran into Sister Helen again.
“I am SO SO sorry Mother Superior, I know you said before, oh my Sister, you look so young and beaut-” the nervous nun said with a mixture of fear and curiosity in her eyes but Mary Catherine cut her off.
“You insubordinate little maggot.” Mary Catherine said with venom in her words as a voice in her head urged her to punish sister Helen.
“You will be punished for this heinous infraction.” Mary Catherine said looming down on the young nun.
“Y-yes of course, I’ll clean whatever you want, I’ll say a thousand rosaries. I’ll do anything.” Helen said pleading. Mary Catherine stayed silent however, choosing to simply smile unnervingly at Helen and beckon the young nun to follow her.
Helen walked timidly into the Mother Superior’s bed chambers after Mary Catherine who had disappeared into her connected bathroom. Helen stood nervously, not wanting to touch anything for fear she would do something to anger the Mother Superior. However her nervousness only skyrocketed as Mary Catherine walked out of the bathroom in a most unexpected outfit.
Gone was her habit, replaced with tight black latex that showed off her impressive curves. What was most shocking was the item in the Mother Superior’s hand. While having zero experience with such things, Helen was sure that Mary Catherine was holding some sort of sex toy in her hand. It was a large almost wand like item that seemed to glow purple and hand a long length of leather attached. Helen shuddered to think what she had in mind for it.
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“Undress. Now.” Mary Catherine said sternly.
“Mother Superior, I don’t think this is-” Helen began before Mary Catherine snapped back.
“That’s right you don’t think. You don’t think where you are going and you don’t pay attention to those that are more important around you. But that changes tonight. Now strip!” Mary Catherine said with malice. Helen obliged by slowly undressing.
Within a few minutes Helen was standing naked in front of the Mother Superior who eyed the girl up and down. Swinging her sex you she approached the nun until their faces were mere inches apart. Helen didn’t know until it was too late, but Mary Catherine did this to distract the young nun from the sudden insertion of the sex you into her pussy.
Helen gasped as the cold phallic object pushed deep into her vagina until with a pop her lips closed tightly around it. Helen couldn’t help but shivering in pleasure. She had never allowed even herself to delve so deep but the sex you felt as comfortable as a glove.
“Come here my pet.” Mary Catherine said as she walked a few feet away. Helen however stood still, still rather shocked by what was happening. Rolling her eyes the Mother Superior tugged on the leather lead and Helen was compelled forward. Each step hitting a different erogenous zone.
“Now my pet, I have enchanted this wonderful little device to slowly instill you with subservience to me the longer you wear it. I found it in this deliciously dark book of spells. I’m starting to think witches may have had the right idea. I’m telling you all this because you will, by now, be unable to fight the growing loyalty you feel towards me, isn’t that right?” Mary Catherine said with an evil smile.
Helen looked at the Mother Superior, her face conflicted. Inside her mind, a war was raging, one that the moral and just part of her was losing. She smiled at Mary Catherine and said, “Of course Mother Superior, I will do anything you ask.”
“Excellent, now get on all fours like the dog that you are, you are going to lick my new boots clean with that wretched tongue of yours.” Mary Catherine said looking at her new leashed companion with equal parts disgust and excitement.
The next day the convent was a buzz with word that the Mother Superior had gotten some sort of makeover. Gone were her sensible habits and elderly charm replaced with outfits that showed off her new youthful voluptuous figure paired with a distinctively cold demeanour.
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Over the next week she seemed to pull up nuns for the smallest of infractions and banish them to her quarters where she would enter soon after. The nuns would then emerge changed, more docile, more loyal to the new Mother Superior. Weirder still was that the Mother Superior herself seemed different too. She would exit her room looking younger, hotter, and more confident.
Some of the nuns she reprimanded had become her enforcers, reporting infractions directly back to Mary Catherine. Enforcers like Sister Helen even started to dress and act like the Mother superior, copying her purple hair, wearing tight latex outfits. The convent was looking less like a place of worship for god each day and more like a cult of worship to one woman, Mary Catherine.
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But despite her growing authority over the convent, Mary Catherine still felt a tug at her conscience, a little voice that nagged at her telling her what she was doing was wrong. She had only wanted to stop the spread of Kat’s influence over the other sisters and instead she had taken that influence and weaponized it for herself.
And yet she couldn’t deny the results. The sisters had never been in such revelry towards her. It was an intoxicating feeling having so many of them literally kiss her feet and praise the actions that she committed. Even when they were deplorable acts against themselves, they begged her for more. No Mary Catherine needed a change but not to her new outlook.
Walking confidently over to Kat’s bed chambers, the Mother Superior was done with hiding in the shadows and instead kicked the door down with her six inch heels waking Kat inside.
“W-what the hell are you doing?” Said an incredulous Kat but the Mother Superior just simply snapped her fingers and a swarm of her loyal supporters rushed in and held Kat down.
“You’ve been a thorn in my side since you arrived you little bitch, but if it were not for you then I wouldn’t have realized what power I was lacking. And now it’s time I take the last of that power from you.” Mary Catherine said with a disturbing smile as she produced her magical sex toy that she had used to build her growing army. Only this time there was a matching glowing plug on the other end as well.
Stilling up to Kat, she shoved one in into the rebel’s pussy and watched with joy as Kat’s eyes rolled back into her head. She had made the magic much more potent this time after all. Taking the other end she then delighted in slipping it into her own wet pussy. With a pop it found purchase nearly inside her and she grinned in satisfaction.
Happy that they were ready, Mary Catherine began chanting the Latin words she had memorized. As she did, the plugs deep inside her and Kat began to glow. Their two bodies became bright purple sources of light. So bright that the other nuns had to shield their eyes.
“Yessss! Yessss! Give me everything! Make me everything she was! Erase the last drop of good in me!” Mary Catherine yelled as the light filled the room.
Then just as quickly as the light had appeared, it disappeared with a whoosh. The nuns in the room all blinked and rubbed their eyes, trying to refocus their vision. Once they had they found only one figure remained where once there had been two.
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Mary Catherine stood transformed before them. Everything about her was more emphasized than before. Her hair more purple, her tits bigger, her nails sharper, her face colder, and her power inarguabe. “Mother Superior are you ok? Are you hurt?” Helen asked concerned. Mary Catherine responded by grabbing Helen by her neck and lifting her effortlessly off of the ground.
“Never better. From this day forth you shall refer to me no longer as Mother Superior Mary Catherine, but instead as Goddess Katherine. Understood?” The new goddess commanded and the rest of the sisters all nodded and bowed in respect. Katherine looked at Helen and for a moment contemplated snapping her neck. The thought brought a wetness to her pussy that delighted her but she knew she would need Helen, at least for now and so let her down.
“Thank you Goddess for the pain, I do not deserve your touch.” Helen said sycophantically kneeling before her mistress. Katherine didn’t even pay her much attention and instead walked out of the room into the cool moonlight of the courtyard. She licked her lips as she looked at all the doors belonging to the nuns she had yet to ‘bless’.
“Come along sisters, we have much work to do.” She said with a wicked smile as she strode to the closest door, ready to convert another sister to her flock.
THE END
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wildemaven · 1 year
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Saturday’s with Javier: Sleepless Nights
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Pairing: Javier Peña x F!Reader
WC: 1840
Warnings: E- sex to sleep, unprotected P in V, orgasms, nipple play, established relationship, fluff, 2nd POV, nightmares, mentions of alcohol, I think that’s everything- if I forgot anything let me know.
A/N: Y’all! I don’t even know what this is or if I even like it all that much. I wanted it to be this steamy scene for them, so I pushed myself to get smuttier than I have before but I don’t even know if it reads that way. So, if it sucks I’m sorry!
Series Masterlist / Main Masterlist
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Sleep eluded Javier.
Not as often as it once did.
But it does from time to time.
He thinks back to his time in Colombia when it was late nights, surviving on rich black coffee just to make it through one more report.
He’d settle into his apartment, locking the world out in hopes to catch a few hours of rest before it was time to get back to the embassy.
Rinse and repeat.
He’s grateful though when sleep doesn’t come easy these days, it’s not due to hunting down leads or chasing big name narcos from town to town, it’s due to normal life happenings. Some nights finding his brain just won’t shut off, as he lays awake against your sleeping form.
On those rare occasions, Javier silently waves his white flag and surrenders himself to the night.
*
The living room is his retreat on sleepless nights. He hates leaving you to sleep alone, knowing you hate waking up with out him near, but he’s always worried his restless movements will wake you.
The radio is low, as it plays through the local radio station, drowning out the incessant tick of the wall clock— it’s always the loudest on these nights.
The leather pulls at his bare skin as Javier shifts in the chair, his previous position already sending an ache to his lower back.
His book abandoned on the coffee table, the page where he left off dog-eared and ready for next time.
A mug sits half empty and cold on the end table next to where he’s been sitting for the last hour. Its contents a tea blend of chamomile, lemon balm and some other spices you’d picked up for him for these nights.
He settles back into the chair, a gift from you when you’d bought this house, you said he needed a comfy place to relax after his long hours on the ranch— he’s indebted to your need to care of him in ways he’d never think to.
The minutes continue to tick on, the night slowly teetering on the edge of tomorrow. Annoyance seeping through the cracks of his wakeful mind.
Breathing out a huff of frustration, Javier drops his head on to the back of the chair, eyes closed, accepting the fact that sleep is not in the cards for him this time.
Theres a creak of a wooden door opening, followed by light footfalls down the hallway nearing where Javier still sits in the dimly lit living room.
“Javi?” Your voice still soft with sleep.
His attention snaps to you padding your way through the room to him. When he’d left you in bed you were bare, but now you’re wearing his shirt— a deep green, soft and worn-in from his years of wearing it, he prefers seeing it draped over your form now.
“Shit! Cariño, did I wake you?” Sitting forward, an elbow resting on his knee as his other arm extends out you, beckoning you closer to him.
A yawn escapes, your arms raising in an attempt to stretch out your wearied muscles, your shirt— Javi’s shirt —barely covering your lower half.
“Mmmm, no you didn’t wake me. Couldn’t sleep and you weren’t there when I rolled over.” You grab his hand and sit down on the edge of the coffee table in front of him, pulling his hand into your lap.
“How long have you been awake?” Noticing his book next to where you’re sitting and the mug on the side table.
“An hour or so maybe. Came out here so I wouldn’t wake you. Made some of that tea, little reading and listening to some music— hoped something might do the trick.”
Your fingers dance across his hand, soft lenitive strokes as you listen to him talk.
“Nightmare?”
“No. Not this time. Just couldn’t get back to sleep.”
Nightmares had haunted him for years. Stealing away his sleep, plaguing his mind with thoughts of his past. Images and stories that had been seared into his mind for years. Even after Colombia, night was an enemy to Javier, always grateful when the sun saved him from the darkness of his dreams.
That was until you. He couldn’t remember a time when he’d slept as good as he did with you next him. He felt more relaxed, his mind was quiet, he’d wake feeling rested and ready for the day.
There were times when a nightmare would crawl out from the depths at which they lay dormant for months, trying to ambush Javier when he’d least expect them. Those nights he’d wake in your arms, your voice pulling him into safety, reassuring him that you were with him and he was okay.
“What can I do to help?” Brushing a few of his loose strands of hair out of his face.
“I don’t even know. Feel like I’ve tried most of my usual things so far.”
“Most?? Is there something else that might help?”
He thinks back to his nights in Colombia, when he needed to sleep just a few hours so he could get through the next day.
“I don’t know Cariño, it’s late and—.”
“Humor me Javi— You’ve got to get some sleep. Especially if you don’t want Chucho to give you shit, he worries about you when you show up looking like you haven’t slept in days.”
“In Colombia, I had a few things that helped, but don’t know if they would do me any good now.”
You give him a look, encouraging him to continue to share his thoughts.
“Smoking— helped me relax, took the edge off of those long shitty days.” His skin tingles at the thought of the nicotine pulling through the his lips.
“Hm… Javi, I know it’s been awhile, but if you need to— y-you can if it will help.”
“No, no I don’t need it.” He shakes his head, seeing the worry in your eyes.
Javier had quit smoking. You had never pressured him to do so, but when he had mentioned it was something he wanted to finally stop, you were there to support him through it. He hadn’t touched a cigarette for 4 months and wasn’t about to just for a night of sleep.
“What else might help you?” Tilting your head to the side as you wait for him to share, your fingers continue to card through his hair, gently scratching at his scalp.
“A drink or two, but it’s too goddamn late for whiskey— I’m not that young anymore. Pops would give me shit for working with a fuckin’ hangover.” You laugh in agreement.
“Well, smoking and drinking are out of the equation. So that leaves….” Your teeth sink into your bottom lip trying to hide your smirk, knowing exactly what that left— sex.
You knew about the brothels, the women he’d pay for information and doubled as a late night release, every bit of his past was no secret to you. And you never held any of it against him ever, it’s now just a part of who he use to be— judgement wasn’t something you ever gave him.
He doesn’t even have to say a single thing before you’re leaning forward, capturing his lips with your own.
You place your hands on his shoulders, pushing into the kiss as you slowly push him back into the chair, fervently crawling into his lap so you could straddle him.
His hands instinctively grab your hips as you deliberately grind down on to him.
“C-Cariño, you don’t have to. It-it’s late-fuck-it’s late…”
He can feel your unclothed sex through his thin boxers, which are now damp from your dripping arousal and his pre-cum mixing together. His body’s reaction is desirous and eager, he’s hard as your movements continue at a steady pace.
“Mmm. I want to, especially if it means my husband will be asleep in bed with me after—ooh— I want to make you feel good my love.”
You’re body craving more, breathless as your hand drifts down under his waistband, your fingers gliding over his taut warm skin. Kissing him again as you remove his hardened length from his boxers, sliding the tip of it through your soaked folds.
Javier looks down as you slowly begin to sink down onto his cock, taking him inch by inch, unhurried in your efforts which has his nerve endings firing off instantaneously.
“Fuck!” His hands working hastily to remove your shirt, the slightest bounce of your breasts as your naked form begins to move in up and downward motions.
A groan barrels from his chest at the sight of you, an ethereal vision lost in effortless pleasure. Your eyes closed, blissed out at the feeling of his cock hitting every little sweet spot.
“Oh Fuck— Javier!” His name nearly a whimper as it floats through the air.
One hand still steadily gripping his shoulder for support and the other now holding your breast, kneading its weight. Each calculated squeeze and gentle rolling of your nipple, is a building sensation that sends a ripple of lust surging through your body.
“Javi— ah— I’m so close… I’m—“ He can feel you squeezing him, a fierce grip on his length, prompting him grab on to your hips tighter as he thrusts up into you.
“I’m not— shit— gonna last much longer—“ His voice shaky as he groans, trying to warn you. “T-touch yourself baby.”
You nod at his direction, a hand snaking down between where you’re both melding together, swiping your fingers through the slick gathering at the base of Javier’s cock.
It’s blinding the instant your fingers glid over your sensitive clit, swollen and needy, each circular motion of your fingers edging you closer and closer.
Your thighs are trembling, Javier pulling you down to him, his thrusts now faster and deeper. Your mouths fusing together, a tangled mess of licking and sucking, shared moans and staggered breaths.
Before you can even start your warning of coming, your body tenses as your orgasm explodes through your body. It dances about in a slow succession of pulses, each one pulling Javier in further, triggering his own release.
“God— J-Javier I love you!”
He pulls your body tight against his, fingers digging into your dewy skin as he spills into you.
“Fuck! I l-love you, Amor!”
*
You’re both not sure how much time passes as still lay draped over Javier. His fingers delicately stroking the length of your spine, your breathing evened little puffs against his neck.
“Javier, if you keep doing that I’m going to fall asleep right here.” You whisper into the crook of his neck.
“That’s the plan Cariño.”
The leather sticks to you as you shift your tired legs, adjusting your body up so you’re hovering slightly over where he’s still laying back on the chair.
He looks relaxed— eyes looking sleepy, heavy slow blinks as he looks at you.
His hand settles on the back of your neck and pulls you in until lips meet in a soft drowsy kiss.
“Let’s go to bed Cariño.”
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Where We Begin and End [Misunderstood Breakup Trope]
Pairing: Frank Castle x Reader
Trope de Sept Masterlist | Main Masterlist
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Misunderstood Breakup situation 1. One person thinks the other one has broken up with them due to a misunderstanding "Frank comes home injured and it shakes you to your core, the next morning he’s gone and you think he’s left you"
Warnings: Angst into a happy ending. No gender or pronouns specified for reader. No use of y/n. Established relationship. Nicknames sweetheart and baby. Blood/description of a bullet injury and the repair of it. 
WC: 2,033
*I never give permission for my fics, manips, or any other original creation I post on this site to be copied, posted elsewhere, translated, or fed into any AI program. The only platform I currently post anything on is Tumblr. Thanks!*
Your fingers trembled as you worked, the silver tweezers dropped from your shaking hand and fell into the porcelain sink under you with a clang. 
‘Shit” you mumbled under your breath and retrieved them, the metal tool threatening to fall from your slippery, blood-covered hand again.
“S’ alright sweetheart, take your time.” Frank said softly
Usually his reassurance in a dire situation calmed you. But tonight there was an edge to his voice that had your fragile nerves teetering on an already thin tightrope.
You went back to the task in front of you, hesitantly plunging the tweezers into the flesh of his lower back, attempting to remove the bullet that had ricocheted and lodged itself there.
Repairing Frank after a long night out wasn’t an unusual occurrence for you. The sight of his blood didn’t typically phase you, having spent countless nights tending to his wounds as an act of love. But tonight, the injury in question had you fearing for Frank's life. 
You were by no means a medical professional, but you knew enough basic anatomy to know this bullet was dangerously too close to his spinal column and one wrong move by either of you could at best leave him with permanent nerve damage and at worst paralyze or even kill him.
“Almost got it.” You weren’t sure who you were trying to reassure more, him or yourself.
The dulled copper end of the bullet finally poked through amongst the crimson flooding the hole and the marred skin around it. You pulled it out, sighing in relief and releasing a breath you didn’t realize you were holding.
Frank, always so stoic and calm, faced away from you sitting on the edge of the bathtub, elbows on his knees. His nostrils flared and his lip twitched, as the pain threatened to creep past the barrier against it he had plenty of practice building up. You were too busy threading the needle to stitch the hole closed that you hadn’t noticed his subtle signs of weakness.
Getting the bullet out was the hard part and an invisible weight lifted off your shoulders knowing if your mediocre medical repair hadn’t gone awry yet, it probably wasn’t going to from this point forward.
Your skin felt damp. God, how had you not noticed until now? You were sweating buckets from nerves and knew there was some of his blood on your face as well. Probably from unconsciously trying to wipe the sweat from your brow as you worked. Oh wait. There were also tears there. When did you start crying?
The silent air between the two of you felt heavier than a led balloon as you stitched the wound, neither of you daring to speak as you wiped the area down with an alcohol swab. 
“Okay um…” you sniffled, not wanting to let the flood gates fully open until you were out of the room 
“I cleaned up the blood surrounding it pretty good, so try not to get it too wet in the shower.” You finally commented, your work finished. 
Frank nodded his head. Typically a man of few words, especially after coming home from a job, he remained unnervingly quiet as you disposed of the bandage wrappers and gauze in the small plastic trash can under the sink. 
He leaned forward as if to speak, but decided against it, and instead turned on the spigot in front of him, letting the warm water splash against his feet. 
Avoiding his gaze, you washed your hands in the sink. The water ran down the drain in a river of scarlet, then a rusty orange, then eventually clear, the colors increasingly blurring in your vision as more tears filled your eyes. 
A soft thump behind you jolted you upright, adrenaline still buzzing and anticipating whatever might happen next. You relaxed a little again as you realized it was just Frank removing his jeans and tossing them on the floor as he changed the knob from the lower faucet to the shower head and stepped in to clean himself of the blood and grime of the evening. 
You never ask about what happened. No matter how severe the injuries he comes home with are, you never want to know. But tonight shook you so to your core, you can’t help but be curious. 
How did he make such a large miscalculation? Was it because he was getting old? Too distracted by his home life with you? Why had his bullet-proof vest not done a better job at protecting such a sensitive area? Your brain swirled with a million questions. 
He grunted in pain from behind the shower curtain and it made you jump once again. As the hot water hit the plethora of other wounds he came home with tonight, he knew you were still uneasy behind the shower curtain. 
“S’ okay baby. Really.” he reassured again
You proceeded into the bedroom, pacing in circles and not knowing what to really do with yourself, still unable to let yourself fully cry. 
A few minutes later, Frank emerged in a cloud of steam, a towel slung low on his waist. 
“You should be resting sweetheart.”
“Wanted to make sure you were okay before I laid down.”
“C’mon, I’ll lay with you.”
Gingerly, Frank laid on his stomach, not wanting to irritate the wound by sleeping on it. You curled into his side, resting your head on his shoulder, no longer able to hold the levee against your tears. They ran down your face in streams, soaking his shoulder and your pillow case.
“Pl.. please Frank. I can’t. I can’t do this anymore. I’m not asking you to change who you are but I can’t keep loving someone who constantly puts themself in a position where I could lose them. I can’t lose you Frank.”
“Sweetheart, you know this is what I do though. You know it’s dangerous. It’s just part of the job.”
“Don’t make me go through what you went through with Maria.”
Frank didn’t respond, only rolled on to his side to pull you against his chest and comfort you with his calloused fingers running soft lines against your skin until exhaustion finally won out and you fell asleep.
The pounding headache was the first thing you noticed in the morning. The heaviness of your eyelids as you attempted to open them was the second. 
You reached out for Frank, but your hand only met empty space and crumpled sheets.Not unusual for him to be up before you.
A dull ache radiated through your body as you slowly rolled out of bed. Frank was nowhere to be found in the kitchen, not making coffee as you suspected he might be.
“Frankie?” you called out, voice still small and croaky with sleepiness
But there was no answer.
You looked at the front door. Frank’s boots, coat, and keys were gone. He always let you know when he was going out and when he’d be back. You checked your phone. No text. 
Everything else seemed to be in place in your apartment but the feelings from last night still gnawed a pit into your stomach.
You remembered how scared you were and how you’d begged and cried until you fell asleep.
You’d asked Frank to do the impossible, something you’d never ask him, to give up being the Punisher. 
And he seemed he’d made his decision. He was gone. Walking out of the life you’d built together like it was nothing.
Getting ready for work was a chore you struggled through. Any sane person would take the day off after everything you’d been through in the last 6ish hours. But you needed the normalcy and the distraction, not wanting to sit around the apartment wallowing, waiting for something to happen that you knew wouldn’t - Frank coming home from wherever he’d gone.
You grabbed his hoodie from the hook in the entryway on your way out. You always wore it on days he was away, when you were missing him extra badly. God, how sick it was that the thing you were grieving was also the only thing you knew would bring you even a little bit of comfort.
You spent most of the day just sitting at your desk, staring at your computer, not really getting any work done. 
“God you look awful.” your coworker Kate commented when she popped her head into your office around lunchtime
“Frank and I, um… we broke up.”
“Jesus. I’m sorry. What happened?”
“We… something happened last night and when I woke up this morning he was gone.”
“Wait? Did you guys actually have a conversation about breaking up?”
“Well no but…”
“Did he take any of his stuff with him? You know like someone leaving would?”
“Well no but…”
“Did you, ya know, text or call him to see where he is?”
“Kate. Look. I just know Frank and after what happened, I just know this is it. He’s gone.”
Kate took pity on you and offered to take you to lunch to take your mind off of it. As you exited the office and walked to your favorite Thai place on the corner, you decided to take her advice and text him, knowing that you wouldn’t get one back.
Frank. I’m worried about you after what happened last night. Please just let me know you’re okay.
You must have checked your phone 30 times at the restaurant, with no notification of him texting you back showing up.
The walk back to the office was silent, Kate giving up on inventing one sided conversations to keep your mind off things.
A bouquet of peonies sat on your desk when you got back, as well as a pair of dirty combat boots attached to a very tired looking Marine, appearing as though he could use a nap, lounging in your office chair with his legs crossed and up on your desk. 
“Frank.”
“Hey sweetheart. You know your office needs better security?” he said casually as if he was just commenting on the weather and hadn’t just walked out of your life mere hours before
“You’re here.”
“Yeah.”
“But you left.”
“Yeah. Sorry to run out so quick this morning, but something came up.”
“But you didn’t text me back. Let me know. You always let me know.”
Frank sat upright, removing his feet one at a time from your desk and walking across the room to stand in front of you. He reached into his back pocket and held up his cell phone between you. The device, cracked across the screen and smashed in the one corner, looked entirely useless between his calloused fingers.
“What do you think the bullet ricochet off of?”
You weren’t sure if it was a chuckle or a sob that escaped your mouth, but it finally broke your resolve and you threw yourself into his arms.
“It was in my back pocket and the bullet hit it and it flew up between my back and my vest. Was gonna get a new one today, but Madani yakked my ear off all morning.”
“Madani?”
“Last night had me pretty spooked too. I didn’t sleep. Thinkin too much about what you said. You were right. My biggest fear is you getting hurt, losin you like I lost them. Didn’t even stop to think that losin me might hurt you too. But you remindin me how it felt when I lost my family… made me realize what you go through with me and all my bullshit.”
“So why were you with Dinah?”
“Remember when I told Madani I’d start working for the CIA when hell froze over? Well guess the devil better buy a coat…”
“Pfft I’ll let Matt know next time we see him… God, you scared me Frank. I thought you left me. That we were done. When I didn’t hear from you and you weren’t home. After last night…”
“You ain’t getting rid of me that easy.”
“That so, big guy?”
“Yeah gonna go be a CIA man. Wear a suit and work in an office and shit.”
“You look good in a suit, Frank.”
“Think I look like a dork”
“But you’re my dork?”
“Damn right baby.”
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effeminateboyninja · 6 months
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WAGER
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3.2k | Toge Inumaki x gn!reader
S Y N O P S I S : You and Toge have been dancing around what everyone else already knows to be true, when finally a bet between friends brings it all to the forefront.
C O N T E N T : friends to lovers, fluff, brief mention of alcohol
A / N : loosely inspired by a song from OKLAHOMA! of all things. anyway it’s my first fic in a long time i hope u enjoy ! mwah!!
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You rush down the sidewalk past buildings that flew by in a blur, feet tapping against the stone in a rapid procession that matched that of your thoughts.
Rarely, if ever, was there notable gossip within your group of friends. Sorcerers all, the daily tribulations of your shared profession usually stole the attention that might be reserved for petty speculation enjoyed by more typical individuals of your age group. Rarer still, were you the subject of such gossip. That novelty, and the eager sense to immediately share the news is what propelled you now at such a frantic pace towards the courtyard where a familiar figure was waiting. Toge — the white shock of his platinum hair coming into view first as you round the corner to approach him where he sat. Dutifully obeying your instructions to meet you there, texted to him just a few minutes earlier.
His eyes light up as soon as you come into view, widening when it’s clear that your rapid advance doesn’t seem to be slowing. You reach the bench where he’s sitting and barely manage to skid to a stop, the momentum of your actions toppling you down beside him with an exasperated sigh.
“Kelp.” He chuckles, amused by your dramatic arrival.
You give him a quick obligatory, “Hey, Tog,” as your hand reaches out in a well-practiced motion for the zipper on his collar, pulling it down below his chin so you could see his mouth and the marks on either side of it.
“You wouldn’t believe what I just heard!” the exclamation comes just as soon as the afterthought of a greeting leaves your mouth.
He looks back inquisitively and you continue without missing a beat. “So I overheard Yuji and Nobara talking...”
His eyes crinkle as he smiles and he types something on his phone: “You were eavesdropping…”
“Okay fine, I was eavesdropping!” You relent, “But that’s not the point! The point is — they have a bet… About us!”
You pause dramatically, waiting for an appropriately scandalized response and when none comes you continue, only slightly deterred. “More specifically, the bet is about whether or not we’ll start dating. Us.” You huff, “Can you believe that?”
He doesn’t miss a beat, his tone level and his expression unphased. “Salmon.”
“Right?! That’s what I said. Like why would-“ His response finally registers in your mind and you do a double-take. “Wait, what do you mean?!”
He pulls up the notes app on his phone again and his thumbs dance across the screen before turning it so you can read the message he’s typed.
“well I mean maybe if you didn’t flirt with me so much… 🤷‍♂️”
You scoff and raise your eyebrows skeptically. “Oh, I’m the one who flirts? Please. That’s all you.”
He furrows his brow slightly and tilts his head to the side.
“Oh don’t play dumb with me. You practically act like my boyfriend.”
“Bonito flakes.” He protests, a faint smile pulling at the corners of his mouth.
The truth is Yuji and Nobara’s bet is not unfounded — not in the slightest. The two of you have been playing this game for far too long for your younger friends’ nearly nonexistent patience. But Toge loves it. He revels in the fact that your friendship with him teeters on the edge on something more and cherishes every little slip up that shows it.
“Whatever, liar.” You smile and shake your head. “We need to set some ground rules.”
He raises his eyebrows curiously.
“Ground rules, you know? A list of things you need to stop doing so people will stop thinking we’re a couple.”
He smirks, the cursed symbol on his cheek twitching upwards.
“I’m serious!” You reach and arm out to give him a playful shove, but he dodges it expertly. His smirk only grows, earning him an eye roll.
“First of all,” you start, ignoring his smug expression, “you’re way too good with my parents. You’ve got to stop impressing them so much or my mom will never stop calling you her future son-in-law.”
He scoffs, hastily typing up his rebuttal.
“are you actually complaining that your parents like me rn?? my bad, let me just make them hate me 💀”
You groan, “You know what I mean! You brought my mom flowers that one time, like c’mon.”
He smiles, remembering the occasion last year. It was your mother’s birthday and he knew that you’d be spending the day with her, which meant he wouldn’t be able to. He needed an excuse to at least see you for a few minutes — and so the white-haired sorcerer dropped by a flower shop and made his way down the familiar route to your house with a small arrangement of carnations and daisies. She’d loved them of course, and insisted he join the two of you for lunch. Mission accomplished.
He sighs dramatically, but relents “fine, no flowers for your mom… she’ll be devastated tho”
His add-on at the end makes you chuckle. “I’m sure she’ll survive.” You assure him.
“anything else?”
“As a matter of fact, yes,” you respond to his newest note and sit up a bit straighter, putting on a playful air of haughtiness. “Don’t laugh so much at my jokes. I know I’m devastatingly funny, so that might be a challenge, but it gives people the wrong idea I think.”
His thumbs are tapping his phone screen before you can even finish your last sentence. “Who laughs at your jokes? 🤔”
The quip earns him another shove. One that lands this time because he’s too busy laughing at your shocked and offended expression to dodge it. Toge’s laugh is a soft, bubbling sound that in spite of your last statement, you could listen to a million times and it would never be enough.
He catches his breath and straightens up a bit then points to himself, an ever present ghost of a smile playing at the corner of his lips. “My turn” he mouths.
That’s only fair, you think. So you nod, encouraging him to elaborate. He crosses his arms into an “X” in front of his chest — no more — then he points to your eyes with his index and middle finger, then points to himself.
You stare at him puzzled for a moment. “I’m not allowed to look at you?” You ask incredulously.
He shakes his head and rolls his eyes, mouthing. “Not like that.”
“Like what?” You laugh.
“Like this,” his lips move silently once more and he reaches out his hand, cupping your cheek to hold your gaze, his lavender eyes locked with yours, sparkling mischievously like he’s got a secret he’s about to share with only you. There’s a beat of silence. And you have to work to resist the urge to lean in and kiss him. He just looks so pretty. Had his lips always looked so soft? So perfectly paired for your own…?
“Alright fine,” you exhale, shaking yourself from your reverie and grasping for an excuse to turn away from his touch. When his hand falls away from your face and you can breathe normally again, you speak once more. “The notes then. You’ll have to stop collecting them.”
You’re referring to the scraps of paper the two of you use to communicate when his riceball ingredients aren’t enough and he’s too lazy to pull out his phone. The ones he refuses to throw out, opting instead to fold them into his pocket and place them neatly into a shoebox under his bed later for safekeeping. They might just be random bits of paper, small snippets of past conversations with no context, but he doesn’t need any. He can recognize if you were happy, excited, sad or angry when you wrote each one by just the subtle changes in your handwriting. Keeping those notes is important to him; each one of them a memory that he has of you, and has no intention of kicking the habit any time soon.
This is one rule he won’t entertain. He shakes his head defiantly and furrows his brows. “Bonito flakes.”
There’s a sense of relief at his refusal as you let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding in. This habit of his was one that had always made you feel important to him in a way that separated you from all his other friends, and it reassured the tamed and quiet part of you that hoped this familiar game would someday come to an end in your favour to see he didn’t want to relinquish it.
“Alright, I suppose you can keep the notes,” you say, and he beams, relieved by the knowledge that you enjoy his more sentimental tendencies.
Relieved too, that you clearly didn’t understand his one and only ground rule, because there you are again looking at him with that magnetic gaze that makes his heart melt.
You’re so focused on him that you don’t notice the phone he’s holding up for you at first, and he has to wave it slightly to get your attention.
“is it really so bad though?”
“What do you mean?”
“is it so bad that people think we’d make a good couple?”
No.
Your inner voice answers before you even have time to process that he’s asking you this — Toge, who’s occasional flirting you entertained, sure, but who you had convinced yourself long ago was off limits. Only allowing yourself a little self-indulgence once in a blue moon, wondering about what it might be like to take the plunge and turn your friendship to something more. A subtle touch every now and then, lasting just a bit too long. A moment of absentminded closeness, eyes flitting to lips before embarrassment comes blundering back in, followed by a blush and flustered change of subject. Those things were more than enough for what you had long ago accepted as just a silly and wholly unserious crush on your closest friend. It wouldn’t be right to risk all the trust and comfort the two of you had built as friends for just a chance at knowing what it would be like to call him yours. But here he was asking — what would be so wrong if you did?
Or was he? The doubt creeps in to cloud the excitement just as quickly as you’d let yourself believe he might return your feelings, and you begin convincing yourself that it’s just too good to be true.
Toge can see the gears in your head turning, the adorable and familiar way your features twist in concentration when you’re thinking really hard about something. He imagines reaching out his thumb to brush away the lines that have formed between your eyebrows as you furrow them at him, trailing it down to trace your lips and bring it back to touch his own — an inadvertent kiss.
But he doesn’t. Now, he needs to know your answer.
Your response finally comes as a tentative murmur, purposefully vague and noncommittal in an effort to suss out whether he’s being genuine or just teasing. “I guess not…”
His face falls just slightly. “you guess?”
“Well, I mean, I don’t know..” You huff, shifting uncomfortably in your seat. “What do you think?”
“i don’t mind at all.”
Your eyes race over the words a few times, just to be sure, then flick up to his face searching for any break in his level expression to indicate he was kidding around. But there’s nothing. Not even an echo of the smirk he wore earlier. An answer eludes you and you can only purse your lips and stare at him, desperately trying to figure out how you’re supposed to respond.
That’s when the young sorcerer rolls his eyes and lets out an exasperated sigh, his patience finally being worn thin. The game had been fun he thinks, but your obliviousness was getting downright painful at this point. If he has to spell it out for you then so be it.
He looks you in the eyes, his expression as serious as it’s ever been on his most important mission and takes hold of your hands in his. They give a gentle squeeze, urging you to pay attention. Then, he points his index finger to himself, makes a heart with his hands, and points to you. Repeats twice more for good measure, and looks at you with a gaze he hopes says I’ve loved you since I met you, you are so, SO precious to me.
There, he thinks, there’s no explaining it away this time; there’s little room for interpretation in those movements.
Your face morphs with the motions of tentative understanding, a curious disbelief present in your expression. You could imagine his voice, the sound of it dutifully committed to memory despite its infrequency — saying the words along with each movement: I. love. you. I love you. I love you.
“Don’t mess with me Toge,” the last vestiges of your hesitation voice themselves, stern despite the giddy excitement that sent your stomach fluttering, “flirting is one thing but this is entirely different, it’s cruel.”
My god, the cursed speech user thinks to himself. You’re certainly not making this easy on him, a fact he supposes is only fair considering how long he’s let this go on. He shakes his head, a baffled smile playing across his lips. Well, that only leaves one option.
“I love you.”
This time, the sound of his voice is not imagined. He doesn’t imbue any cursed energy into the words but the air around you two still seems to tingle with a latent electricity in their wake. You shoot him a shocked look, eyes wide as saucers as your mouth opens to chastise him. But Toge is quick — and somewhat impatient after all this time — leaning in before your accusation can be fully voiced to cut it short with a long overdue kiss. Your admonitions are forgotten completely the moment his lips meet yours, mind consumed with the feeling of it, with him.
It’s a soft thing, your lips moving gently together for only a few precious seconds that still manage to send your head spinning. When you retreat slightly, forehead resting on his own, he grins wildly before pulling you back in for another, deeper embrace that brings his hands to either side of your face and presses yours eagerly against his chest.
Minds rushing with the thrill of it all you both stay there for the better portion of the evening, making up for the lost time. Lips on swollen lips, hands in tangled hair, just kissing, kissing, kissing…
***
A few days later, you and Toge are at Yuji and Megumi’s apartment to gather with all your friends for the first time since the two of you made it official.
The group chat went absolutely wild when Toge announced your status as a couple by casually sending a picture he’d taken of your arms wrapped around him and face buried in his neck — and after a barrage of excited texts, decided that you all needed to get together to celebrate.
“Finally!” Yuji exclaims loudly as soon as you walk through the door, wrapping both you and Toge into a tight bear hug that lifts your feet off the ground. “I knew it! I totally called it. Did I not call it?”
“Hardly impressive on your part,” his roommate chimed in from behind him where he stood with his hands in his pockets. “We all knew it was going to happen eventually.”
Fushiguro nudged around his loud, enthusiastic friend to greet the two of you with handshakes and quick ‘good to see you’s before retreating to the kitchen to get drinks for his guests.
“I called it.” Yuji insisted. Then, “come!” He waved you both towards where everyone was gathered and joined them. Maki and Nobara were wedged on the couch, sharing the one remaining cushion not occupied by Panda’s hulking form. And Yuta, smiling proudly at the two of you like he especially had known the inevitability of this pairing, sitting cross-legged on the floor in front of them.
You and Toge exchange greetings with the others, join Yuta on the floor, and fall into easy conversation with the group who had only grown closer in the years since graduation. Toge’s arm wraps around you instinctively, pulling you close to him. He’s so caught up in the boastful satisfaction of the action he hardly notices when Fushiguro returns passing out drinks. You take his drink for him along with your own, offer an apologetic smile for your raven-haired friend that is met with an understanding smirk and shake of his spiky head.
Hours pass, drinks are downed and conversation gets louder and more interspersed with raucous laughter.
“So which one of you started that bet anyway?” You ask eventually, playful and curious. “And which ones of you bet against us, huh?” You cross your arms over your chest and look at the group, narrowing your eyes in faux suspicion as you examine them. It’s this action that stops you from noticing the way your boyfriend straightens, sharing a look with his best friend across the coffee table. One that contains the guilty awareness of a schoolboy about to be caught in his mischief. Yuta stifles a laugh.
The rest of them exchange confused looks, then looks of understanding, before joining Yuta in suppressed amusement.
“You haven’t told them yet?” Maki directs her incredulous question at Toge, and scattered snickers and gasps follow from the rest of them. You watch him intently for his response. Which, is at moment, only a sheepish grin and deep blush of his cheeks.
Just like the night that he kissed you for first time and told you he loved you, this time slightly dulled by the drink, the gears in your mind start to turn and you start putting it all together. Then it clicks.
“Oh my- I’m so dumb.” You chastise yourself for the delayed understanding and Nobara bursts out laughing. Grabbing her stomach and falling back dramatically against her girlfriend who only halfheartedly rolls her eyes before joining in with a chuckle of her own. Of course Toge had been the one to start the bet. Which was in truth less a wager on whether or not the two of you would get together, but how quickly. Of course he knew Yuji and Nobara wouldn’t be able to keep quiet about it, eventually making it known to you.
You turned on him then with a knowing smirk and leaned towards him, “Were you planning on telling me, hmm?”
He shrugged, blushing more furiously now as your face neared his.
“Well,” you say, now just inches away from him, “I’m glad you did it either way.” You close the last of the small distance and catch his lips in a kiss. He kisses you back, and the way it sets his heart racing is enough to distract him from the teasing hooting of your friends who are most definitely not going to let him live down either this display of public affection, or his part in the bet that started all this. Which is just as well to him. He’d been playing the long game after all, and the outcome was exactly as rewarding as he’d hoped.
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