#i will also probably give them a different name but idk what yet

[baylardian-1]

some horse doodles :)

my cringe tf agenda with lil cheese is that they gradually develop draconequus features as they age bc pinkie had all the chaos magic for a hot minute lol

but i dont wanna get too crazy with MIDS til i make the final form

[bokutosbiceps]

don't be afraid to catch feels

eustass kid/monkey d luffy/roronoa zoro/trafalgar d water law/usopp/vinsmoke sanji  x gn!reader | fluff | ~2k words

warnings: some suggestive/18+ themes but nothing explicit

a/n: idk i just really wanted to write so THIS was born !!! how some of the one piece boys realize they have feelings for ya !!  might do this for other fandoms too…actually yeah i will LOL probably if i don’t forget

NOTE: i end them after their confession on PURPOSE so you can choose your own adventure 😆 also there’s more dialogue for luffy’s + usopp’s so they’re a bit longer !!

18+ MDNI | under the cut for length

eustass kid is angry. he's angry that he developed a crush on you. it's so stupid, he thinks. so outta character.

everyone on the victoria punk knows it, including you. and much to kid’s dismay, so does killer. killer talks to him about it everyday, trying to coax a confession out of him in the most gentle yet firm way he can. he wants his captain to be happy, and he knows that you can make him happy, because you already do without knowing it.

kid is completely docile in your presence, and protective. he’s more quiet, because he wants to hear what you have to say. he’s around more, because he wants to keep an eye on you. and maybe because he likes being in your presence.

kid tells (threatens) the rest of his crew that, even though they’re like brothers to him, they’ll be ripped to shreds if any of them so much as glance at you the wrong way.

luckily for you and unluckily for him, you’d heard his very public threat to the kid pirates, save for you. 

you ask kid what the hell all that was about and he simply shrugs, rolling his eyes and trying but failing to keep his cool. you scoff and chuckle at his indignance. you continue to press him till he finally gets annoyed and locks eyes with you, his pupils dilated and his lips spread out into a crazy grin.

“jus’ claiming what’s mine.”

monkey d luffy is seeking out the smartest person he knows, and once he sees her, he’s barreling toward her at lightning speed. hands appear, arising from the wood of the sunny’s deck and forming a net right in front of robin, effectively catching luffy and recoiling him flat onto his butt.

“robin! what was that for?” luffy whines, adjusting his straw hat and tilting it back so that he can look at robin.

“i’d prefer to not be crashed into, captain.” robin shuts her book and gives luffy a gentle, almost maternal smile. “now, what has you so excited?”

luffy is thoughtful as he opts to lay back down on the deck, tilting his straw hat over his face to shield his eyes from the sun. he’s not excited, kinda confused, actually. 

he’s good with his feelings, because he knows his feelings. he's familiar with them. but these feelings—the ones he's been feeling for the past couple of weeks or so—are new. he doesn’t know them, but he wants to learn about them. so here he is, ready to learn with the smartest person he knows.

“well…i wouldn’t call it excited, ya know?” luffy stretches his arms overhead before folding them behind his head. robin chuckles quietly, already aware of luffy’s feelings before he'd even realized them himself.

“what would you call it then?” robin asks patiently.

“like…i dunno! it’s different! it’s different with ‘em…” luffy trails off, sinking back into his thoughts.

“different with who?”

“y/n!” luffy chirps, feeling himself smile at the mention of your name. “i’m really happy they’ve joined the crew!”

“happy like…you’re happy that i joined the crew?” 

“nuh uh, like…i always wanna be near ‘em. i like when they laugh, when they’re happy. their smile’s real nice, too.” luffy pauses. “it’s a lot of fun to be alone with ‘em! makes me feel good…”

robin takes her time explaining what these feelings mean, that that bubbly, queasy feeling in his stomach was not, in fact, indigestion. once robin’s words seep into luffy’s thick, rubber skull, he jumps up off the deck and wraps robin in a tight hug, grinning the whole time and whisper yelling i gotta go tell ‘em!

luffy finds you instantly, almost like his body contains a homing device that always leads to you. you notice way too late that you are in the direct path of the tornado that is luffy, and he tackles you, causing you to fall back. luffy is quick to catch you, stretching an arm around your waist and bringing you to his chest, looking at your face with such intensity you can’t keep your face from heating up.

you’re breathless. due to the adrenaline from almost cracking your skull against the wood of the ship, and from the i’ve got feelings for ya! robin says they're love feelings! do you feel the same? that rushed out of luffy’s mouth.

roronoa zoro is confused. honestly, more confused than he’s ever been in his life. then he’s annoyed. why did he have to develop feelings for a crewmate, let alone you? it would just get in the way of everything. he wants to focus on his dream, on luffy’s dream, and sometimes even on sanji’s dream.

he doesn’t consider himself a particularly selfish person, but he wanted to focus on himself first. 

but then he sees you smile. he hears you laugh. he watches you work and hone your craft, a look of ecstatic determination on your face and the tip of your tongue peeking out between your pursed lips as you focus. suddenly, he realizes it’s really not about him anymore. it’s about you.

he starts to avoid you like the plague—he figures that if he can’t see you, you can’t see him. but he’s oh so wrong. 

when you decide you've had enough of this, you stop zoro, your hand gripping his shoulder and pulling as hard as you can. zoro raises an eyebrow at you and turns around, crossing his arms and waiting for you to explain yourself.

“you’ve been avoiding me.” you state, leaving no room for disagreement or excuses.

“says who?” zoro is very good at playing dumb.

“says me. and luffy.” you huff a bit as you remember your encounter with your captain. how his lips had twisted to the side and how his eyes had shot up to the sky when you’d asked what zoro’s problem was.

“luffy doesn’t know—”

“know why you’ve been avoiding me?” you step closer to zoro, your eyes locked on his and staring into his soul, searching for answers. “i’m sure we’d both love to know.”

zoro scoffs and rolls his eyes, taking a step back from you and turning his face to the sea. the cool ocean breeze feels nice against his burning face. he grimaces as he turns back to you, figuring he might as well get this over with.

“ilikeyou.” zoro mumbles, the words rushing out of his mouth and stopping quickly as they had started.

you shake your head and lean closer to zoro, turning your head to the side so his lips are inches away from your cheek. 

“can you repeat that, please, roronoa?”

“i like you.” zoro says the three, short, quipped words. he’s frowning and his arms are crossed and pulled tightly against his chest, in hopes to dampen the hammering of his heart.

trafalgar d water law is no stranger to stuffing his feelings deep inside of his chest and leaving them there to rot. so he’s wondering why in the fresh hell these annoying feelings for you keep resurfacing. they crawl up his esophagus and reflux into his mouth, leaving a bitter taste behind and making him scowl every time he feels them. 

and to you, it seems as though every time the two of you lock cross paths, he narrows his eyes at you and stalks away. he rarely talks to you anymore, although the conversations you'd shared before were usually very short, yet somehow still meaningful.

you decide to confront him about it, byway of bepo, who happened to know exactly why law was seemingly scarce around you. 

“c-captain? our captain?” bepo stutters, bringing his paw up to his mouth and feigning surprise. “wow! i have no clue why he’d do something like that!”

you frown at bepo. it’s painfully obvious he knows everything about the answer to your question. “spill it, bepo.”

bepo starts to make gestures with his hands and little struggle noises with his mouth. he has no clue how to get out of this one. so he does, indeed, spill it. 

a few minutes later, after bepo was done with his rambling and law’s confession, you approach law with a smug smile on your face.

it doesn’t take a genius to be able to tell why you’re smirking like that, and law immediately pinches the bridge of his nose and tilts his head down.

“that damn bear…”

usopp is sweaty. he’s sweaty, he’s wringing his hands, twirling his hair around his fingers, readjusting his goggles on top of his head. he can’t sit still. he’s been thinking about how on earth to deal with his feelings: does he just shove 'em deep down inside or does he shout 'em from the crow’s nest? he hasn’t had romantic feelings for anyone since he left kaya, and he simply cannot deal. 

“usopp…” nami says softly, touching usopp on the shoulder. he jumps, then flinches at his overreaction to his best friend’s simple and gentle gesture. “can you just tell them, please?”

“n-no! why should i?” usopp frowns at nami and furrows his eyebrows, knowing full well that it’d be best for his health and the crew’s sanity to just come out and tell you.

“if you don’t…” nami grins at him, slowly and mischievously, “i’ll tell them myself.”

usopp immediately springs up from his chosen sulking location and mutters an okay, okay! behind him as he leaves nami. he’s back to sweating, wringing his hands, playing with his hair, and fidgeting with his goggles.

you notice usopp looking particularly dreadful and wait for him to get closer to your position on the deck. you reach out and catch his hand, giving it a light tug so that he’s moving closer to you. he seems so deep in thought that he doesn’t even notice.

“usopp?” you tug on his hand twice, trying to get his attention. usopp meets your gaze and stares at you blankly before shaking his head and becoming aware of the situation. he tries to withdraw his hand from your grip but you’re holding on tightly, and he realizes he’s trapped.

“y/n! fancy seeing you here!” usopp laughs loudly, trying to mask the way that he’s absolutely crumbling and melting.

“what’s on your mind, usopp?”

“you.” usopp covers his mouth with his free hand immediately after the words come out of his mouth. what was he thinking, being so forward? he quickly looks away from you, directing his eyes to the clouds above. “i mean, nami was talking about you earlier. that’s why i’m thinking about you. no other reason!”

a small smile spreads across your lips. “oh, yeah. she told me something super interesting about you earlier today…” you say, drawing out the last few syllables and relishing in the way usopp looks at you in utter horror.

“nami told you that i like you?” he breathes.

“no, but you just did.”

vinsmoke sanji is aware that he actually likes you. that you're not just another pretty face he admires. he’s always known you were gorgeous, the apple of his eye, the object of his affection. you never noticed that it different, though. thinking back on it, you’re glad that you didn’t notice, because you might’ve thought it meant something bad. quite the contrary, in fact.

sanji knows he loves you when he feels calm in your presence. when he’s not acting like a fan boy and when he spends hours talking with you while he cooks or does the dishes or plans the crew's next meal. you’re always around, and yet, he’s never nervous. 

when he really realizes it, though, it’s when he catches a glimpse of nami’s naked silhouette through the crack in the bathroom door and he doesn’t even flinch. not a tingle, not a single palpitation. it’s not you, and his heart knows it, so he’s calm. this is when he knows he has to confess.

“y/n…darling…” sanji says, grasping your hands in his own and looking you in the eyes. “i have to tell you something—something i’ve never told anyone before.”

you look at him, an eyebrow raised in skeptical curiosity. sanji looks worried, and he almost never looks worried. your mind is going a mile a minute, your brain flipping through pages and pages of things he could possibly say to you within the next minute. because of this, you miss the way sanji squeezes your hands, and the way he sucks in a deep breath.

“i’m in love with you.”

taglist: @usoppsstar (i literally can’t remember anyone else rn lolol, i just knew i wanted to surprise ya coco) | @kingofthe-egirls | @pileofmush | @anemptypuddingcup

[neiptune]

and love me if that's what you wanna do

cw: 1.3k wc, suggestive, female reader, sex with feelings, mentions of hickeys/bruising, idk what to tell you he's my golden man and i love him so

“You’re beeing creepy”

The groan Shoyo emits almost makes you break into a smile, eyes still shut as you hear him scoot a little closer.

“How did you know?” despite not seeing it, you can envision his pout all the same.

“I can feel your eyes on me, creep” you feign disapproval. He huffs, as always encouraged by the lack of authenticity in your annoyance.

“Don’t be unfair” despite still being heavy with sleep, Shoyo’s mumur in such close proximity succeeds in giving you goosebumps “not my fault my girl’s so pretty” his thumb traces your jaw with a soft touch. Your heart beats a little faster, still having a hard time adjusting to a charm so innate.

“Shoyo” you warn but he’s already burying his face in the curve of your neck, nose grazing your skin.

“I know, I know” he petulantly clicks his tongue “but don’t I get to claim you a little after last night?”

With a sigh, you can’t help the way your hand reaches into his copper curls to absentmindedly scratch his scalp, a content hum rumbling in his chest at the touch, imposing arm further curling around your waist.

Hinata’s always reckless like that, dangerously dancing around the edge of a precipice that could turn your lives upside down if you as little as took a peek downwards. You can hear it in his voice each time, how he doesn’t want to claim you only for one morning. The way he’d be ready to toss away the stupid occasional hookup for something different, for more, he’s always hungry for more in every aspect of his life.

“Shoyo” you playfully tug at the tangerine strands and feel che curve of a smile against your neck “we have to get up”

“Not really” he continues his ministrations, slowly sponging kisses over your shoulder “we don’t have to do anything. In fact, we could very well never leave this bed again”

“Your team and a consistent part of the country would probably have my head”

“You could have head too, all you have to do is ask”

“Hinata”

A quiet laugh shakes him.

“Fine, put the government name away” a pause, you can feel each tense tendril enveloping it  “are you still coming today? I said I’d bring a friend”

“Will they believe I’m a friend?”

He props himself up on one elbow, golden eyes ever so slightly hidden by tufts of ginger curls the first thing you see as you finally peel your own eyes open. There’s hesitation in his stare, mischief laced into the smile tugging at his lips, but there’s also candor in his reply.

“They may not but I promise it’s what I told them”

You roll your eyes. Who could even believe you’re just friends when he can’t keep his hands to himself ever? They’re always glued to you somehow, whether you’re strolling through the grocery store or helping a tourist asking for directions. It’s like Hinata fears you’ll drift away if he doesn’t make sure you’re anchored to him shomehow. A hand on your shoulder, an arm around your waist, fleeting touches that never leave the small of your back or legs neglected.

And yet Shoyo never oversteps, always makes sure to respect your boundaries and your wishes. If anyone assumes you’re a couple, he’s quick to politely correct them. At the slightest hint of discomfort on your side, he takes a step back and busies himself with any other activity at hand. It’s why your heart painfully squeezes whenever you look into those big, bright eyes of his. It makes you feel as if you’re wasting his time, or worse, tricking him into entertaining a relationship that’s not really a relationship. Because of course you like him. But you’re not Shoyo, never scared of anything anymore, always ready to wear his heart on his sleeve. You’re firm in your belief that he could do better but are still selfish enough to relish in his warmth, for as long as he’s willing to give it to you.

“What?” he lightly pokes your cheek, amused, and you realize you’ve been staring.

“Can I kiss you?”

Hinata chuckles, cheeks warm as they always get when you timidly let some vulnerability leak through that stubborn facade of self-restraint.

“You never have to ask” with tenderness, he cups your jaw with one of his giant, warm hands, and cranes his neck to press soft lips to yours. It’s light, feathery but firm, tongue mildly prodding at the parting of your lips but never pushing in despite you giving him access. Shoyo wants you to remember these moments, the mornings he spends adoring you, the conversations late at night when you’re both too out of breath to fall asleep. He wants you to come back to instances when his sheer devotion shines through, hopes to seal how he actually feels into your skin and mind.

“We really have to get up” you whisper into his mouth before pulling away, pretend not to notice how his hand lingers on your face, thumb fondly grazing the corner of your lips “I don’t want to be late the first time I’m meeting your friends”

“They won’t care” he shrugs off your concerns but knows the perfect bubble he could spend an eternity trapped within has been popped.

“I will” you grin, peck his lips one last time before swinging your legs over the edge of the bed.

“You’ll also get mad” his pretty face contorts in… mirth? Like a kid who knows is about to get caught doing something he shouldn’t.

“Mad? At your friends? Why, are they sexist or somethin’?” you haphazardly slip into one of your comfy house dresses and shuffle to the bathroom, more or less convinced you still have some makeup to take off before hopping in the shower.

The reflection that stares back at you in the mirror is nothing short of horrifying. Still in bed, Shoyo gnaws at his bottom lip, awaiting a screech that sure enough explodes right away.

“Hinata!”

“I’m sorry!” he screams back, laughter barely contained as he realizes it’s best to get up too, in a silly attempt at containing your nerves.

“You’re sorry? I can’t go out like this! I look like I need to be rushed to the fucking hospital!” you cry out and his reflection, now staring at yours in the mirror, has the nerve to giggle.

“It’s not that bad!” he awkwardly scratches the back of his head “I didn’t notice I, uh, overdid it”

“You didn’t notice you went fucking Edward Cullen on me?!”

“Technically that’s not a good comparison, he doesn’t really bite her until the fourth-”

“Oh god, shut up!” you whine, stepping closer to the mirror to get a better look at the mess that is your neck. They’re just everywhere. Scattered just beneath your jaw, along the column of your throat, a couple on the side of your neck in intimidating hues of purple and maroon. They hurt.

“How about wearing a turtleneck?” he hopes the suggestion placates your fury but it only seems to fuel it.

“It’s 104 degrees outside”

“I’m sure some concealer…”

“Concealer isn’t going to do shit, it looks like I hooked up with goddamn Dracula” you almost stomp your foot in frustration and Hinata can barely contain the proud grin threatening to stretch his lips. He steps closer, wraps his arms around your waist and lets you deflate against his chest instead.

“I’m sorry” he murmurs into the crown of your head, eyes catching yours “you don’t have to come. I’ll tell them you couldn’t make it”

Unhappy, you lean into his touch. “But…”

“Hmm?”

“I wanted to meet them” the confession comes out quietly, just as you avoid his piercing gaze in the mirror. Shoyo swears his heart grows in size as his arms wrap a little tighter around you.

“Let me take care of this, then” he murmurs into your hair and you observe him for a moment too long, the way his tan, toned arms compliment your frame a dangerous thought you whisk away.

If his friends think it’s weird that you’re wearing a silk scarf at lunch, they’re considerate enough to never point it out.

[dear-ao3]

Question for the mods....

HOW IN THE FUCK DID YOU MEET???

Like what???

How??

I am so god damn curious about you two. I wanna study yall under a microscope lol

Also ngl kinda envious of how close of friends you two seem to be. (Being an introverted shy af mofo sucks lmao)

I would actually probably read a whole ass book or watch a sitcom or something of the seemingly ever present weird-ass shit that seems to happen on a day-by-day basis.

/gen /lh /nf /pos

2018 newsies fandom. we weren't overly close but we bonded over race and albert a little and then katya dropped off the face of the earth for about a year.

during 2020 lockdown we both independently got into the witcher fandom and somehow ran into eachother again and had the fingers pointing OH MY GOD Y O U !!! moment in our dms. we bonded over hating jaskier. during this time we realized we were both dancers and katya was looking at dance colleges, i was already in college for dance and since it was lockdown and we couldn't go anywhere i told katya my experience auditioning at places to give him a good idea of places. and then i broke every internet safety rule known to man and said hey what if you had applied to my college but didnt know it?? and then one thing led to another and i dished out all the tea on my school. (only After that did we face reveal and give eachother our names lol) and then katya applied. mostly as a joke. until it wasnt a joke because that school gave katya a shit load of money and actually had stuff katya wanted to do. katya ended up coming to one of my zoom ballet classes and it took everything we had to not loose our shit on camera.

during this time we mostly kept eachother sane in lockdown writing witcher fanfic, and sending eachother awful thirst traps on instagram to pitbull music. one of our awful bits was using the dilf filter to make bad frat boy edits.

come august of 2021 we both moved into college. the same college. in the same building. it was wild. i pinched myself several times in shock. we went on a walk around campus with some worms on strings and were like what the hell how did we get here.

we continued to hang out and did weird insane things together. we took a class on the french revolution together where i had to put up with katya and fennec awkwardly flirting (read: making finger guns at eachother).

and then, since i was 2 years older, i was graduating and was going to stay in the area for a job and was like hey. what if we got an apartment together? and then we did. several adults agreed to this. idk why they let us. but now we live together in a real life apartment and we haven't even killed eachother yet. neither of our parents know that we met online. each of them have a different fake story as to how we know eachother and we really just hope they are never in the same room long enough to ask eachother about it. but its insane. 12/10 would recommend.

katya wanted me to include old tumblr screenshots of us talking, heres what i found from circa 2020:

we've always been like this lol

and heres some ancient greatest hits from instagram, i dont have context and trust me you dont want it:

every now and then the two of us look at eachother and go. how the fuck did we end up here??? (we have no idea)

[tyunn1ngz]

soobin nsfw alphabet

cw: as ambigious as i could but could come off as afab!reader in some sections! no gender stated as always<3

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

clingy!!!!! making sure ur alright, that nothing hurts, have u peed yet dont get urself an infection, do u need food or some water, u just want cuddles oh ok he can do that!!!!!!! its endearing despite overwhelming how much he cares :]

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

his hands and ur wrists/neck and these go pretty hand in hand bc his obsession with both starts bc of how his hands look wrapped around different parts of u >_> !! becomes especially obsessed with how easily he can wrap his long fingers around ur wrists (although hes entirely too gentle everytime he does it in ur opinion) !

if u have tits he’d also be a very big fan of them!

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

another one who cums a Lot. loves cumming inside u so much dont make him pull out </3 he will of course but u could b filled w his babies cmon :< even if u can’t get pregnant he will be acting like u can and it makes him so nasty

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

RLY adores cumming in u and then clean it all up w his mouth, might feed it to u sometimes too, tongues tangled up w ur mingling tastes :p

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

a little but everytime u would think its his first time, and he knows what he’s doing up until pleasure makes him stupid, and his most feral instincts take over :3c

f = favourite position (this goes without saying)

pretty standard w missionary, likes seeing ur face especially when he wraps his fingers around ur throat. if u have boobies hes also a fan of u riding him just so theyre in his face and he can have his mouth on them the whole time. even if u dont hes gonna b sucking and licking at ur chest w reckless abandon tbh he doesnt care . shrugs

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

hes more serious but not too intense, its typically light hearted bc its just him rly caring for u ! <3

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

generally well kept hes a manscaper or whatever but hes not that hairy to begin w. random but i want him to have heart pubes idk ฅ/ᐠ. ̫ .ᐟ\ฅ

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

very!!!!!! intimate!!!!!!! even when he’s rough this man is fucking u like he loves u (which granted, he does) holding u close while he rearranges ur insides and tells u ur the prettiest person hes ever seen .. sighs dreamily

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

if he cant be w u hes absolutely jerking off all the time and he loves it just as much as sex itself tbh. huge perv he cant help that his mind is always in dirty places and making his cock hard. who doesnt love jerking off sometimes ! hes real for that idgaf !

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

breeding or pretty much anything to do with cumplay at all. overstimulation and edging probably big ones for him too!!! both giving and receiving ;3c

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

besides ur bedroom, the couch bc it means u can ride him, and the shower; despite how inconvenient and slippery it might get sometimes ＿|￣|○

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

literally anything and everything u do will get him going. smth spills from ur mouth when u take a drink, hes hard. he gets even a tiny glimpse of under ur shirt, hes hard. he even remotely thinks abt kissing u a little deeper than whats usually chaste and hes hard. u name it, he’ll find some way to divert it in his mind to some perverse memory or fantasy

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

just nothing taboo, otherwise i don’t actually know what i’d say his turns off are … :S nothing to draw blood either

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

not any particular preference— he loves using his tongue on u as much as he loves having his cock in ur mouth, so u ask him and he’ll probably just end up shrugging and tell u that he’d love both at the same time if u would ever 69 w him<3 although he does like seeing u struggle to take his big cock w tears in ur eyes, so maybe sometimes he leans a little one way than the other ʅ（◞‿◟）ʃ ！

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

slow to start with so u can get used to the stretch of taking him, hes so big after all :((( soothing u with a shaky ‘is it too much, baby?’ before he fucks the absolute lights out of u when u give him the go ahead x_x

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

loves a quickie bc he loves getting off like i have said a few times now ! obviously loves it more when he has time to savour and rly enjoy himself w u but he loves it all the same that he gets to giggle w u while u breathlessly do smth so dirty ✌︎('ω'✌︎ )

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

yes and yes! risky to him sometimes is hotter and therefore best! ready to get caught by any of his members at anytime im afraid … poor guys … kinda …

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

lasts a long time but its bc he tries and wants u to cum first, otherwise he’d blow his load so fast. edges himself if he really thinks hes abt to give in to his high. will go for as many rounds as u want and can handle bc again, always managing to make himself hard around u so !

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

BIG fan of his fleshlight !!!! probably doesn’t own anything much else in terms of sex toys outside of that but thats all he probably needs anyway !!! jerking himself off w it when ur away, or fucking into it while u watch and say such dirty things to each other hnnnffff :(((((( ‘wish this was you, sweetheart. don’t you?’

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

a crazy amount, but he makes it worth it bc u always get what u want in the end anyway, why not let him have a little fun w it? ur just so pretty when u beg a little <3

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

louddd whimpers and the prettiest moans, and he practically hiccups when he gasps, he sounds sooooo pretty</3 tries his hardest to keep his volume down but u moan and it’s practically like a response the way he can’t help it :<

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

wants (needs) to be pegged/topped at least once in his lifetime but has no idea how to ask for it which is crazy bc of how nasty he already is in bed. if u wanna bottom just say that, king! u have the ass for throwing it back!

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

ive seen the dick print tweets he is HUNG. end of talk thank u

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

do i need to comment on this one or have we gotten the message yet … say hi hi hi hi 안녕하고 말할 만큼

take me high high high high 나를 좀 더 데려가 줘

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

not so much tired as he is just satiated? ,,,so he’ll be pretty dozy but loves to chat w u after the fact. or at least he likes listening to you talk yk? he’ll give u hums of acknowledgment while u run ur hands thru his hair and pretty soon u’ll have him snoring away against ur chest lol<3

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

Bait and Switch. || Scammer!Reader x Victim!Ghost

Rating: M Words: 2.6K~ Pairing: scammer!Reader x victim(but not really)!Ghost CW: phone scams/conning (reader never actually cons him), financial issues?, threats (Simon threatens to find reader), degradation?. other tags: crack, OOC Simon., you/your pronouns (gn!reader but uses a female fake name), obviously fake names (pun/funny), lying, joking, the weirdest meet cute? a/n: this started out as a joke/crack and turned serious/dark at the end? idk how i did this.

Simon Riley would say that being legally dead is the best thing to have happened to him and that's because it allowed him to escape a bunch of responsibilities that regular men have to uphold.

He gets paid covertly, in full, and does not have to pay taxes on his income.

He rented a flat from a sweet ol' lady, who didn't run a background check or ask for a copy of his birth certificate (terrible choice on her part), and he pays her by dropping an envelope of cash in her mailbox on the 1st of every of the month.

He not only is old enough to drink but also sounds and looks old enough as well, which means he doesn't need I.D. to buy alcohol (not that any shops or bars really care enough to check).

He doesn't have a credit card. Or a debit card for that matter. Hell, he doesn't even have a bank account, so he doesn't have to pay maintenance fees.

He doesn't have a smartphone. And up until recently he only had a pager. In fact, the only reason he doesn't have a pager anymore is because it got shot in the crossfire during a mission... so Price forced him to get a jitterbug.

In short... Simon Riley can escape a lot of things (death, taxes, Philip Graves...). But telemarketers and phone scammers are not one of those things.

That's how, on a boring Wednesday afternoon, his new phone ends up ringing, like it had been doing multiple times a week for the last four weeks.

Telemarketers.

He never got telemarketers on his pager.

He hated telemarketers.

But that didn't mean he blocked them-

"What?" He answered as soon as he picked up the phone.

An automated voice came over the call, one of those typical Siri-esque robot voices, delivering a prepared speech: "Congratulations! You've won a free cruise to the Bahamas! To claim your prize, press 1."

Oh, now, this was different. He didn't need to hear more to know it was a scam call. But that didn't mean he was going to hang up.

So Simon pressed key 1, which caused a beep to sound over the call.

"Thank you!" The automated voice continued. "We are now connecting you to a live operator to claim your prize!"

Barely a millisecond went by before you took over the call. "Good afternoon, this is Stella Gormoni with Blissful Blessings Inc.! Who am I speaking with?"

As stereotypical as it is, Simon had expected a different voice on the other end of the line... maybe from a scammer in a foreign country who'd speak heavily-accented English...

But instead, he got a sweet and professional sounding person... It almost made him second-guess the scam that was being pulled on him.

His mind moved quick at coming up with a fake name. Not just a fake one, but a pun one too. "Wanh'a, first name Aiden." He replied, his gruff voice reverberating on the call.

"And how do you spell that?" You asked him politely, and, through your headset, he could hear your keyboard keys clacking in the background.

"That's A-I-D-E-N." He replied as he entered his kitchen, spelling his first, as if that was somehow what was causing you difficulty.

"Uh-huh!" You acknowledged in a peppy tone. "And... your surname?" You asked him.

"W-A-N-H-'-A." He continued spelling as he crossed the small kitchen, hearing your fingers tapping away at your keyboard in his ear.

For a moment, you didn't talk, as if stunned into silence. Had you just picked up on the fact he was trolling you by giving you a name that, phonetically, sounded like 'I Don't Wanna'? Probably. But you hadn't hung up yet.

"Well, congratulations, Mr. Wanh'a, you just won an all-inclusive, two-week long cruise to the Bahamas!" Your peppy tone made him bite his lip to contain a laugh. Well, at least you were dedicated in continuing the scam. "How are you feeling?"

"Very well, and yourself?" Simon asked casually as he leaned himself against the door of his refrigerator, leaning down to look inside and find a snack.

"I'm doing very well, thank you, sir." You replied in a cheerful tone. "So, let's process the information so we can get you your prize, shall we?" You announced in a polite tone.

"Go right on ahead, sweet'eart." He murmured as he grabbed a yogurt and closed the fridge with his hip, sitting at the table and peeling open the lid.

"Well, for us to start, I'm going to need your-"

"Actually, I have a question, before we start." Simon interrupted your speech, cutting off your silver-tongued lies.

You went silent for just a moment before you replied with a sweet little: "Of course, what can I help you with, Mr. Wanh'a?"

"I want to know how exactly I signed up to receive this prize." Simon replied before he placed a spoonful of yogurt in his mouth.

He was trying to accomplish two things by doing this: 1) throw you off your game and make you stammer and stutter, and 2) see how long it took for you to get annoyed, and hang up on him.

"Well, that's what I was going to explain, you see-" You replied, a smile behind your voice, but his trained ears could pick up the slight frustration. It made Simon smile.

"Oh, then, I'm sorry for interrupting you, sweet'art, please go ahead." He replied and gestured with his spoon, as if giving you the stage, unnecessarily so, because you were not there to watch it.

"As I was saying... You were entered automatically into the draw by buying a cereal box of any Kellog's cereal at Tesco. I'm sure you saw a 'Win a free cruise!' sticker on yours?" You asked in a professional and sickly-sweet tone.

He could see right through your scam, he had already done that. You name a famous brand, one people trust, to trick naive or impressionable ones into believing you...

Normal people would tell you they no longer have the cereal box, many of them naive enough to believe your scam despite the fact they hadn't even bought one of those boxes in the first place...

Next, you'd ask for the card used to make the purchase, and some people were dumb enough to read their number aloud to you...

Oh, how he hated scammers. Even more than telemarketers.

"I do remember seeing something like that..." He murmured, his voice deepening, before he popped another spoonful of yogurt past his lips, loudly smacking them right against the receiver of his jitterbug.

"Well, all I need is for you to get the box and read me the code that's imprinted on the inside of the flap!" You announced.

"Well, you see, I would, sweet'art... But my sight isn't so good anymore..." Simon replied. "I'm getting up there in age, you know?" He continued eating his yogurt.

"I understand, sir." You replied. "I'm sorry to hear that. One of my cousins also started losing his vision pretty early." You announced.

Huh.

There was no hint of forced sympathy in your voice.

No, you were being genuine. That was a real story of your life you were telling him...

But you had picked up on the fact he was trolling you, right? So why were you-

"Good thing though, about this system of ours, is that you can just confirm your credit card details so we can double check them and get you that prize!" You had, your tone right back to the scamming silver-tongue you had held until now.

Secretly, Simon had to admit that he admired your commitment to the bit. He couldn't help but smile a bit, amused.

"Oh, of course. Let me just set you down while I get my card." Simon replied and got up, finishing his yogurt and tossing out the plastic container, popping the spoon into the sink, and, after setting down his phone, he walked out of the room.

Simon glanced down at his wrist watch, noting the time on it, then, approached his bedroom door, grabbing his over-the-door pull-up bars, and began doing a quick set, leaving you to 'wait' for him in the kitchen.

After a few sets, he waltzed back into the kitchen and grabbed his phone again. "You still there, da'lin'?" He beckoned in a gruff tone.

You sighed, your politeness sounding slightly more forced. He had kept you waiting for over ten minutes after all. "Yes, sir, I am. Did you get your card, Mr. Wanh'a?"

"Oh, please, enough of this 'sir' thing, Mr. Wanh'a was my mother." He replied, then went silent for just a beat, almost like he could hear your frustration sizzling on he other end.

He was being more and more obvious with his trolling... And it pleased him immensely to imagine a parasite like you seething on the other end of the line, reaching your wits' end.

"You can just call me 'Ai', it's what my friends call me." Simon continued, a smirk forming on his lips. "And we're friends now, right? You're giving me a cruise and everythin'." He added, his tone just as charismatic and peppy as his had been.

"I guess we are!" You replied, returning the overly cheery tone. "So, 'Ai Wanh'a', then?" You asked, but he could hear the mix of frustration and amusement behind your voice.

"Yeah? What d'you want, babygirl?" Simon asked, unable to resist making a more impish remark. And, unfortunately, it had the desired result. It genuinely caused your brain to blue-screen for a moment.

Sure, you'd experienced plenty of people getting angry at you when you attempt to scam them, or even trolling you the same way this bloke was doing but...

It was definitely a first, to have someone flirt with you, even if it was still part of his trolling attempt.

"Your... credit card details?" You ended up adding, your voice still showing the surprise and light meekness that came from him catching you off-guard.

"Oh, of course. Are you ready? It's a very complex number." He replied.

"Ready when you are." You added as you steeled yourself for another smartass response or run around from him.

"Here it is: 1234-5678-9987-6543." He replied, reciting the numbers 1-9 in order and then backward. "And the three digits on the back are: 210."

Oh, he was so fucking annoying! He didn't get to troll you, even if it was pretty amusing of him to do so, then flirt with you, then go back to trolling.

"Sir, if you're not interested in the cruise, just say so. There's no need for this mockery." You replied, your tone serious and professional though you were definitely seething on the inside.

Simon could tell. And he reveled in it. "Oh, but I am interested!" He replied with a smirk behind his voice. "In fact, I want to know more. Will my cabin in the cruise have an ocean view?"

Simon heard you inhale aggressively on the other side of the line, steeling yourself not to hang up on him, or down right berating him on the phone. "Yes, Ai, of course!" He heard your fake cheeriness through your clenched teeth. "It'll be a luxury cabin, actually. Isn't that great?"

"No, it's not that great, actually. I get very seasick, you see?" Simon murmured. "Not to mention, ever since my pet goldfish died, I've just never been able to look at the ocean the same..." He added in a forced pitiful tone.

You went quiet again on the other side and Simon knew he had finally worn you out. He waited to hear the clicking sound of the call falling, but, instead, he just heard you let out a sigh.

"You're very frustrating." You murmured.

"Oh, my, is this how you speak to all your prize winners?" Simon gasped dramatically.

"Shut up... You didn't have to be a smartass, you know?!" You scolded him, as if you had any ground to stand on.

"No, I fear I did, sweet'art." Simon replied as he leaned casually against the kitchen counter. "You called me, interrupted my day, and wasted my time with a scam, of all things. I have every right to be a smartass and have some fun with it." He added, a smug tone obvious in the dulcets of his deep voice.

"Okay? You could've just hung up on me?" You were truly grasping at straws to justify your behaviour. It was comical.

Simon laughed dryly. "And waste an opportunity to annoy a parasitic leech like you?" He quipped.

That stunned you into silence for a moment and you couldn't help but pout a bit.

"Not to mention, what you're doing is illegal, you know that righ'? And I'm military, I could get you arrested for this." He added.

"For that, you'd need to know where I am." You retorted, maybe a bit bratilly. "Besides, I knew you were a soldier."

"And how did you know that?"

"You used the NATO phonetic alphabet while spelling 'your' name'." You replied directly. "Nobody spells 'Aiden' as 'Alpha-India-Delta-Echo-November'."

"So you knew I was military and you still went ahead with your little scam attempt? You're not that bright, are you?" He defied you, which earned him a scoff from your end.

"No, I already knew you were trolling me."

"Oh, so you just wanted to waste my time?"

"That's exactly it, Aiden."

"Sounds to me like you're just looking for trouble, da'lin'." He quipped, his voice having lowered to a gruffer tone.

Rolling your eyes, you scoffed. "Am not. I'm just enjoying myself. You're not the only one that can make jokes at people's expenses."

"No, you really are..." He tutted his tongue and shook his head. "Need I remind you you were trying to scam me, and other people?" He added in a tone that sent a shiver down your spine.

"I know what I was doing."

"Yeah? And are you proud of that? Proud of being a conniving little cunt who tries to take people's hard-earned money?" He taunted you.

You didn't reply. Of course you weren't proud. You still had a conscience! But you wouldn't tell him that. He wouldn't get the satisfaction of hearing you apologise.

"I see. You don't like what I'm saying, so you give me the silent treatment, is that it, sweet'art?" He teased. You could hear the smirk behind his words.

"I wonder if you'd still act like this if you had to face me and had to answer for yourself."

Closing your fists tight, you steel yourself again to gain some edge and reply to him. "I guess you're going to keep wondering then. Because it's not happening."

"You know, it's a shame your little computer spat out my phone number for you to call..." He trailed off.

"And why's that?"

"Because instead of anyone else, you got me... And that's just... really bad luck for you. Any other service member, you would've been fine..." He trailed off.

"What, are you some sort of General-Major-Chief thing, super high up the ladder?" You taunted.

Simon simply chuckled dryly on the other side of the line. "No. But I'm definitely the worst person you could've tried to play with."

"Oh, big scary man, what are you gonna do? Gonna come teach me a lesson?" You added, taunting him some more, clearly feeling comfortable behind your laptop, with your smartphone, sitting at home, comfortable and warm, with your pet at your feet. "Oh, I'm so scared!" You added, feigning fear in a dramatic tone.

"Is that a challenge I'm hearing, sweet'art? Inviting me to come pay you a visit?" Simon asked you, his brow cocking, despite the fact you couldn't see it.

You don't know what it was about the way he spoke. The way he said that. The way his voice sounded.

It sent a shiver down your spine, a cold sweat, like he was, for the first time, not joking around anymore.

"No...?" You murmured in reply, feeling your shoulders tensing in an unpleasant way.

"Yeah... That's an invite I'm hearing..." He disregarded what you said and chuckled. "Maybe I'll come pay you a visit then, hey? How does that sound, little leech?"

[jade-len]

so today i tricked my very straight male friend into reading svsss.

okay look, i wasn't planning to at first and it's not like it was completely my fault. he wanted to read it!

i was showing him how badly they fucked up mu qingfang in the donghua by comparing it to the english novel design (he said that mu qingfang went from looking like a soft dilf to a predator registered on the epstein island list). and then, i showed him how different some of the other character designs were like gongyi xiao's ("he looks like he'd be a genshin character" -friend, to eng novel design) and luo binghe's ("lowkey, he kinda gives airbender vibes" -friend, to bunhe eng novel design)

so that was all i was gonna show him, nothing else. but after seeing them, he goes, "these designs actually look hella cool. what's the book called?"

now, do i:

A. tell him the name, eventually revealing that it's a danmei when he looks it up?

B. just straight up tell him that it's a danmei?

C: don't tell him the name just yet, spill the summary, get him interested, and tell him to not search anything up about it because there's heavy spoilers and it will reveal them the moment he types it up on the search bar

i go with C, obviously.

me: so, basically, some guy named shen yuan transmigrates into an incel harem male power fantasy novel where the protagonist, luo binghe, has hundreds of wives. thing is though, the guy pretty much took over the body of binghe's teacher he had when he was a teenager, who turns out to be a really scummy dude. and now he has to be nice to him so that the protagonist doesn't rip off his limbs and put him into a pickle pot in the future to suffer for eternity.

friend: that sounds hilarious and horrifying at the same time.

me: yes it is, and you should read it. it's like. my favorite novel at the moment. but don't search up anything about it because people spoil that shit. i'll let you borrow my novel

friend: nah don't worry, i'll just pirate it

friend: wait. does it have pictures?

me, my plan coming together: yeah, it has pictures. buuut, when you pirate it, it doesn't. trust me dude, i tried and was severely disappointed. plus, the physical copy is so much better

friend: fuck yeah ok thanks

me: hold on though. i'll text you later to see if my friend who's borrowing it rn is done reading it

he's hyped. he's excited. he craves a good book and a good transmigration interpretation. he's especially happy about the fact that it takes place in a chinese setting with cool powers and an actual good main character. "this sounds so good, god i wanna read it so bad."

i tell him that binghe is actually adorable, too. that it's pretty much found family! my friend then asks if shen yuan adopts him and becomes a father figure or something.

and i said "yes". you know, like a liar. (the father figure part probably isn't a lie though)

now i'm gonna give him the novel tomorrow! of course, i'm gonna cover the chapter 2 bunhe sexual awakening scene with washi tape and say that my baby cousin (sorry baby cousin, you would never <\3) scribbled all over that paragraph with her markers, and since i'm a neat book freak, i put washi tape and just wrote the scene! i don't know if that's really all too believable, but he didn't seem to care that much. just a simple "if my baby cousin did that to my book i would punt them into the sun"

i think what'll be more hilarious is the fact that you can't really tell that svsss is a BL. especially not volume 1. there's like, only a few lines indicating, but if you remove the baby binghe sexual awakening scene then you probably won't be able to know (...if you don't really read romance or anything. idk he's kinda dense anyways). so let's hope he gets attached and has a slow descent into the homo before i drop svsss vol 2 on him!

ok anyways i'll update you guys later with a reblog. maybe in about two or three days lol

(also don't worry, we already fuck around with each other on a daily basis like this. he's already tricked me into reading some manga i was unprepared for, and i thought that it'd be funny to mess around with him using svsss this time lol)

[tsxkkis]

# tsukishima kei - no words exchanged

a/n = i had two bigger tests today and i studied for both of them a lot BUT i think i did well?? let's hope so cuz i'll die if i end up failing them fr... ALSO idk abt this one cuz i didn't have much time to write lately (which resulted in me being dissatisfied with everything i write) but i hope you like it anyways ^^

summary = a school project finally bonds you with the tall blonde from your friend group.

warnings = none tbh, except for kinda ooc tsukki?

if someone had no bigger knowledge of tsukishima kei as a person, they would immediately assume he was greatly annoyed by your presence.

your rambling seemed to not have an end, the excitement in your voice and sparkly eyes clearly indicating just how into the conversation you really were. tsukishima glanced over to your side for a spare second, the sight of you happily explaining something to hinata and yamaguchi in a high-pitched voice gracing his eyes, taking in every bit of emotion in your face, every word you said.

ever since you became karasuno's manager along with yachi, tsukishima has been stuck with that weird feeling inside his gut, one that he so desperately tried to get rid of from the very moment he made notice of it. he couldn't afford himself to waste time on such stupid things as love; or maybe, more precisely, he didn't want to admit to himself he was actually feeling that way towards someone.

on the contrary, you actively thought that tsukishima kei hated you.

for you, the quick glances he stole your way were nothing but an indicator of being annoyed by the amount of words that left your mouth, and it didn't help you were the only person he never directed his snarky comments to. in fact, he didn't even speak to you, almost at all; aside from an occasional small talk with him and yamaguchi or greeting you at school.

out of your entire friend group, it was always the most awkward between you two, a surprising fact when you considered that even someone such as kageyama talked with tsukishima more in his life than you have. and if you were being completely honest, it made you a tad bit sad.

and if things couldn't get worse than they already were, a project for chemistry class with random partners hit you like a smack to the face.

"it's a good thing, though, don't you think so, yamaguchi?" yachi's voice echoed from beside you, the dark-haired boy giving her a nod and a little hum in response. "maybe the two of you will finally bond a little."

"yeah, if we even exchange a word." you murmured, feet carrying you to your locker as you took out the books you needed for your next class.

you couldn't deny that maybe yachi was right. maybe it was the chance you needed to finally break the ice of awkwardness between you two, to finally act like actual friends.

as you parted your ways with yachi, the blonde girl going to her class, your eyes caught a glimpse of a different blonde, much taller, walking out of the bathroom and towards you and yamaguchi.

"[name]."

you almost flinched at the sound of your name from his mouth, and yet something in the way he said it sounded so warm and familiar. your eyes met his as you fully turned your body around towards the boy, head turned slightly upward as you waited for him to continue speaking.

"we should probably meet after school sometime this week to do the project."

you fiddled with your fingers as you stood in tsukishima's doorway, an unsure look on your face as you tried your best not to overthink the situation too much. it couldn't go wrong, right? it's just a project for school. maybe you and him will actually get along.

as you caught a glimpse of tsukishima's frame on the other side of the door, a small smile appeared on your face, the boy waiting for you to take off your shoes before motioning for you to follow him, heading inside his room.

not a word exchanged.

his room was none other than what you expected it to be; everything was neat and organized, and it looked almost untouched. as you sat down on the edge of the bed, eyes still roaming through the unfamiliar place you were in, a small detail occurred to you.

"you have a collection of dinosaur figurines?"

tsukishima tried to hide his embarrassment, but it was evident the second you noticed how the tips of his ears turned red when hearing your question.

"so what?" he cleared his throat, voice as nonchalant as possible as he opened his laptop, sitting down at his desk.

"nothing." you mumbled, eyes following his movements. "i think it's sweet."

he only hummed in response, fingers swiftly moving across the keyboard as he typed in something into the internet, silence taking over the room; so thick you doubt you would've been able to cut it with a perfectly sharpened knife.

ten minutes passed, and tsukishima still didn't seem even remotely interested in starting a conversation with you, a fact that both annoyed and worried you. ignoring the "bonding experience" yachi mentioned it could be for you two, you also had a school project to do.

and that project wasn't even touched yet.

"you know, if you didn't want to work with me, you could've always switched partners."

tsukishima, although taken aback by your question, gave you only a slight shrug in response, seated with his back facing you.

"i wanted to work with you." his words confused you, eyes glued to the back of his purple t-shirt as you tried to process what he could possibly mean by that.

"you hate me, though." you mumbled, barely loud enough for the blonde haired boy to hear you. this time, he did turn around to face you; and as much as you tried, you couldn't exactly understand the emotions behind the expression he had. he looked like he didn't believe what he just heard and, to some extent, that was the truth.

his eyes were fixated on your face, a rare occurrence considering that most of the time the two of you wouldn't even share eye contact.

"i don't."

"you don't really do anything to prove that."

he sighed, hand instinctively going to brush through his hair.

"i'm not used to having friends." his words echoed through the room. "let alone friends like you."

you didn't quite understand what he meant, looking at him with a confused look painted on your face.

"you're loud, and annoying, and you talk so much it makes me wanna throw myself out the window." his words hit you like a knife through your heart. the remains of a faint smile immediately dissapearing from your face. but from what it looked like, he wasn't close to being done talking.

"and yet i can't seem to hate you at all. you make all those traits seem like the most loveable things on the planet."

he stopped for a couple of seconds, as if trying to decide what to say next. tsukishima wasn't used to talking a lot, and talking to you greatly stressed him, as much as he wanted to deny it.

"i don't hate you, [name]. don't make me repeat myself again." he finally added, trying to come back to his usual, cold demeanor. but you could still feel the bits of softness left in his voice, the faintest shade of pink gracing his cheeks.

you smiled, seeing as he turned back to his laptop, typing away again.

"i won't, don't worry." you said, standing up to look at whatever tsukishima was writing down, a grin on your face. "but i am telling kageyama about your dinosaur figurine collection."

he turned to you abruptly, a sight of annoyance mixed with an amused smile on his face, almost as if he enjoyed the playful comment from you.

"don't you even dare."

taglist: @ox1-lovesick @moonswolfie @wyrcan

[lvlyghost]

I LOVE YOUR WRITINGS SO MUCH 😩❤️😍 the way you characterize ghost is so good I can't 😭❤️ I wanted to ask if you could maybe write something for me since your writing style is sooo good frfr

How about ghost and reader have an argument that was started by ghost and he goes a bit too far breaking the reader and making them cry and be just a shell of themselves how would he feel when he sees the readers state and how would he fix it with a happy end please

Broken Wings

Pairings: Simon "Ghost" Riley x F!Reader

Summary: After a night out, things seem to take a turn in your relationship with Ghost.

Word Count: 2.1k

Tw: angst, hurt/comfort, self doubt, jealousy, probably ooc!simon, curse words. lots of grammar mistakes, poorly edited you know the drill🐝

A/N: i loved this request sooo much, though i did have a lot of trouble when writing it since i wasn't feeling too inspired. also had two different stories but ended up deciding to post this one i might post the other one idk, hope you like this anon! I did try my best🫶🏻🤍🩷✨corrections are appreciated; remember english isn't my native language 🐸

Masterlist✨

"I like you." You said with big bright eyes.

"But no one can know about this. Just you and I. That's enough." He answered, hand tracing the side of your face.

You blink rapidly. You have always been daydreamer. It caused you tons of problems although you tried to do your best when you were out on missions. Ghost is walking ahead of you, boots sinking in the sand beneath your feet. The waves crashing on the shore is something you like listening to and seeing too but under different circumstances. Both of your gear clink with every step you take, it's the only sound as well as the sea that swallows the tense silence that falls between the two.

Things have been rather... strange since two days ago and you've tried to talk to him about it. It wasn't weird for Ghost to push you back every now and then, he was a complicated person and you couldn't be more different from one another.

You were the sun and he was the darkness that came at night or so he had said one night at the common room back at the compound. He was stoic, grumpy and hardly found himself enjoying somebody's company. You on the other hand, even though you wouldn't consider yourself the most outgoing person like Johnny, still you liked talking unlike him. You loved going out with the task force. And most importantly you loved when Ghost joined because you loved him, you loved having him around, despite his gruff responses or annoyed looks.

You jog though your legs shake and tiredness sets in your body.

"How much farther until we get there?" You ask, ignoring the fact that his frame goes rigid when you speak . He doesn't acknowledge you at first. All you hear is a small sigh leaving his lips. You kind of wish he wasn't wearing the damn sunglasses so you could see his eyes.

They always said a lot.

"Thirty minutes. Give or take." The answer is short and cold, breaking your heart a little more than before. Still, you decide to try again.

"Sir, is something bothering you?" Before he can stop it he scoffs, shaking his head. "What?" Brows furrowing on your features. "Simon..."

He stops all of the sudden, turning to face you with a tense stance.

"First of all don't bloody use my name out here. Secondly it's your own fault we've been walking for hours. So don't go asking if something's bothering me, Sergeant."

Taking a step back you open your mouth.

"My fault? I was doing my job!"

"Didn't know your job was to get your fucking head blown off!!" He seethes. "Fucking hell you can't be this reckless and expect me to clap at your poor acting on the field." Your heart begins to race, he had never said such things to you. Taking a small step back your grit your teeth, you hated that his words were making your eyes blurry. This was the Simon you never wanted to see. And yet there he was. "Now we lost the damn intel thanks to you." He spits. But something isn't adding up.

"It's not just that. You've been acting strange for a few days now, Ghost. Don't come and tell me it's just because I did what I was supposed to do!" He stiffs yet again. Jaw clenching so hard you fear he might break it. "Not missing the way you avoid me ever since..." you close your mouth shut. "The pub..." he shifts his weight from one foot to another. The waves are increasing and now reach your feet, dampening your boots. And then you remember him storming off the local pub before he even finished his own drink. Everyone had heard the hard slap to John's arm when he had tried to calm him down. God why didn't you pay more attention to that moment? Because you both had agreed to keep your distances? And going after him was out of discussion? Then the next day you'd barely seen him, just for a short moment during debriefs and that was it. The moment you had gotten up from your seat he was gone. And today you were supposed to go to a special op that had soon become a problem that eventually led to the two of you in the middle of a beach, it was a cloudy day and if it weren't for the heavy layers you wore you're certain you'd be shaking. Sometimes –and you were ashamed of it– you were oblivious to many things and it seemed that Ghost's anger toward you was one of them this time. "What happened?"

He inhales deeply.

"It's over. That's what happened."

Your heart sinks and you swallow hard. Your whole body loses color when he mutters those two words. Out of all the things, all the possibilities you thought he'd say to you, he decided to end everything. Shaking your head you try to touch his hand but he doesn't let you.

"Ghost where is all of this coming from I don't understand!" You choke out. "We were fine..."

"No. You were fine. If I wasn't enough you should've just said so."

"Stop... you... what the hell are you talking about???"

"Nothing that matters anymore. Keep walking and don't say another word. That's an order."

He turns and keeps walking as if nothing just happened. As if he didn't just completely broke your heart.

'You were fine'.

What was that supposed to mean? You think, walking a few meters behind him, scared to even say anything else; to even try to grab him by the arm and force him to talk. It would only make things worse right now.

By the time you reach the safe house it's started to rain the silence between the two is deafening and tense. Ghost's cold demeanor and hurtful words have left a scar. Never in a million years would you think you'd be here, with a broken, shattered heart and no explanation from his part.

Words that pierced through your soul.

That day something died inside you. And he was the reason.

-

Two weeks, three days and seven hours.

That's the time that's passed since that day at the beach. Two weeks since Simon broke you and gave you no reasons.

You're a disaster.

You barely eat or get any sleep. There's dark circles under your eyes and you're sure you've lost some weight too. Ghost has been gone on a mission alone with Johnny for a week now, which left you with a lot of spare time to think about the two of you.

More tears stream down your face when you remember that day. Had you missed something important? Was Ghost's mind somewhere dark? Somewhere it shouldn't be? God knows he was... difficult to say the least. But every single time you tried, tried to be there for him. Did those late nights at your home meant nothing? Had he not seen the way you looked at him? Had you not shown him enough of your affection? Everything you'd do for him if he simply asked?

Getting up from your bed you get ready for another day. Not bothering to lace your boots just shoving them inside your shoes you walk down the hallways until you get to the training room. Gaz is talking to John in the far corner, the Captain's arms are crossed over his chest while Kyle frowns and shakes his head. You don't to even go and salute them as you normally would do, instead you put your earphones on and hit the treadmill.

It doesn't last long though; after one minute someone stops it by pressing down the off button. Your brows knitted together as you stop, turning to look up at Gaz who smiles politely.

"Sorry for that, sweetheart. You okay?" You nod, but say nothing more. "Come here." He pats your shoulder and helps you down from the treadmill. If you could smile now you would. But no even the faintest, softest grin leaves your lips. Gaz takes a quick glimpse at your face and rubs the back of his neck. "You know, Soap and Ghost just got back. Heard Lt. was asking about you."

"Oh." You murmur. "Okay." You don't move nor dare to meet his eyes. "I'll just head back to my room."

"Uhmm. I- what I meant is he's looking for you..." Shaking your head you walk away, not having the energy to face Simon right now. And why did he need to see you? Made pretty clear that you two were done, therefore was no need to see each other unless it was work related.

-

"You really do like it here don't you." Your body goes rigid. This was supposed to be your safe place. The roof of the armory was rarely visited by anyone at this hour. Simon's voice seems softer than ever before but you don't answer. Not even turn to acknowledge him. You hear muttered words and then he crouches down to your level. "Price said you're not eating. Do we have to send you to the military counselor now?" How dare he? After all he caused this. You know he doesn't mean it in bad way, somehow he cares for you deep down. Your hands ball into fists, fighting the urge to snap at him, to push him down and just break him the way he broke you. But you don't because you still love him, and could never bring yourself to hurt him. Simon is staring intently at you, waiting, hoping for any sign. He knows he shouldn't be here. Bloody hell he knows you shouldn't even look his way never again. He deserves it. Every bit of it. "Talk to me, love. Please." It's a low whisper. A plea.

"What do you want Ghost?" You ask softly. Simon leans closer, sitting down with his legs propped up against his chest and arms resting on his knees. It's a funny look for someone his size.

"Jus' wanted to see you." You scoff playing with your hands, refusing to lock eyes with him because if you did you'd be done. "Wanted to explain..."

"Then just do it!" You sob. Your lower lip trembles. "And then leave."

"Fine." He agrees. "But I'm not leaving. I- I made a mistake, and took it out on you okay? I was scared."

"Scared?" Your head snaps to where he is sitting. It's painful just to look at him. "Why would you be scared Ghost?" You retaliate

He grumbles, never fancied when you called him that when you were alone. Quite the contradiction given the fact that he told you not to call him his name that day at the beach.

"Because I saw you." He points out. "That night. Everything you're missing for being with someone like me. Can't even show proper affection because it's not me... and you deserve more than that. More than me."

"Ghost..."

"No. Lemme finish, love." He swallows. It's always amusing how controlled he seems. "I lost it, yeah? You looked so happy. How on earth do I deserve you, on what universe do I deserve ya'?"

Sucking in a sharp breath you recall the moments that preceded the events. The sound of music blasting through the speakers, when you joined the rest of the soldiers on the other side of the pub. Private Miller had slung his arm over your shoulders in a friendly manner. You laughed and drank too much that night, it was joyful. Everyone was there, your team. You never thought he felt that way about it.

"Oh my... Simon." You cover your mouth and cry silently. He hesitated for a moment before pulling you close and into his lap. "Should've known something was wrong. Forgive me... I should've stayed with you, follow you after you left." You cry out.

You were scared too, for very different reasons. That he'd get tired of you eventually, that if you weren't cautious enough your secret would be known. Both would get suspended thus separated and discharged.

"No, love. You shouldn't have to go running after me. I should be running after you. Now forgive me, say you will. Or else I might just lose myself for good." You cradle his face in your hands lifting the balaclava just above the bridge of his nose. Thumb tracing his lower lip. Your tears have dried.

"I've missed you so much, Simon. All you gotta do is talk to me, always." He tightens his grip around you. "You think Price would let us go home tonight and not ask questions?"

His chuckle is short and soft.

"Yeah. I think he's known for a while now."

[thoughtsonkm]

Goodbye, for now

BABY? HONEY? BOYFRIEND SHOT? Jikook you're too much!

This episode was truly the best way to end the show, maybe even the best episode of the series. (Neck in neck with episode 2 of course) The way they enjoyed it so much but were also so sad it was over. The hot tension all around, the soft boyfriends mood who can't stop flirting and name calling each other with the most low-key couple-like sweet names. They could not stop laughing, they could not stop touching and they couldn't stop being hilarious without even trying.

~

SK Spotify daily chart end of November 2023 :

Jimin Jungkook Jimin Jungkook Jimin Jimin

~

It would be such a full circle moment if Jimin posted the boyfriend photo (which won't happen). Would almost be like a soft launch of some sort.

Not the underwear too?? Gosh I love my little gay freaks!! (didn't understand why Jimin would quote their 'yet another inner joke meme' right at that moment but I've learned to not question their inner workings)

~

Sorry but i have to be pretty one last time and say that I kinda had enough of seeing so much from the crew around or even in Jikook's shots and angles. It breaks the fourth wall a little too much and ruins the whole bubble idea. Ok I'm done lol

~

Returning to the issue at hand, the "seeing the beds for the first time" scene keeps getting funnier and funnier. As if they don't already have designated sides of the bed 😏

~

Ah the never ending bickering gives me life. Peep the half korean half english talk when they playfully get on each others nerves 👀😂

I better not speak on the scuzzi jacuzzi shenanigans cause otherwise.. Let's just say the photo speaks for itself..

NO YOU KNOW WHAT IMMA SPEAK. We all know that jacuzzi time is always intimate, relaxing and personal for people that's why I wish Jikook had enjoyed it fully without cameras. Yes I'm pissed on their behalf, that they had to film the whole thing with 382929 different angles. lol

His face is literally saying "oh so you're really gonna make me do it huh? if I was in your place I would've folded immediately and would've never let you go through with it!!" 😂

~

No one ever:

Jikook every 2sec : HONEY OH HONEY

(I was actually listening to the song while writing this and idk why it's so funny to me even tho it's a sad love ballad)

~

They must've loved getting the chance to at least see one episode of the show, plus the idea of watching it together..

Jungkook being so entertained by it meanwhile Jimin being mortified about half of the things that happened. HILARIOUS

HAHAHHAHAHA all parties were concerned if they'd be able to pull it off, I can't

BEST BELIEVE they're always gonna find a way to touch. Consciously or unconsciously.

~

This show made me realize that my favourite thing ever is Jk making food for Jimin, then making him hysterically laugh and therefore getting to hear Jimin's adorable giggles.

~

"Hello it is I the one and only, the only one who can touch Jimin's head ble ble ble ble" - JK

Jk was like: How can you imagine Jimin without me in your dream? Are you crazy? What is this delusional dream world you live in Jin hyung??

~

Tbh it's so meaningful and a huge thing saying that these trips were literally the best trips of your life. I think the statement almost went over people's heads.

I can't get enough of Jimin looking pretty and cuddly and Jungkook's immediate thought being: I HAVE TO FILM YOU

Them saying they can do a reboot when they come back gave me some hope that maybe just maybe this is not the end of AYS 😭

The ending bonus clip left me fulfilled but also sad and with goosebumps all over.

Thank you Jimin & Jungkook for letting us peek into this trip and getting to witness some of your precious moments.

Signing off, J&J 🥹

Ps. So I'm guessing the 52 minute video that comes with the photobook is probably the 3 bts videos combined that they've been reviewing for 48392 months right?

[octopus-punching-union]

Yumiko Sumitomo

Yumiko has popped up a few times. She is the person who spread the rumors about Jin's family; she was suspended at the end of the Frostheim chapter, but her name has come up a few times since then.

At the start of the Frostheim chapter, she is gossiping about Jin with other Frostheim students. They talk about "the friend who left Jin's side" and how she wants to be closer to Jin, going as far as to order a dress in from Italy to match him. (Idk what exactly she thinks this will accomplish?) However, she seems really clueless to the fact that Jin has been isolating himself, that he hasn't been going on missions, or that anything might have happened to him.

Tohma steps into this conversation and gets her to shut up by casually mentioning a scandal her father (an executive at Saionji Trading) was involved in, and offering his assistance.

The next time we see her is shortly before the rumors about Jin's family go public. She is running from the chess guardians in the Frostheim vault and disappears while Luca tries to fight them off. Tohma was also in the vault, but acts like he didn't know anyone was there.

After the rumors drop, Tohma tries to call her. She doesn't pick up.

Directly after this, Jin accuses Tohma of betraying him, and Tohma replies that the "the friend who left his side" is the one responsible.

Towards the end of the chapter, it is announced that Yumiko was the one spreading the rumors and that she has been suspended. The Chancellor is irritated that Jin pressured the academy to give her a lenient punishment. Tohma didn't know ahead of time that Jin was going to do this, but says it is fitting for Jin, as the president's son.

Yumiko is mentioned again in the Vagastrom chapter, when Leo confronts Alan and Tohma together. Leo claims that he found evidence that Tohma has been extorting the Sumitomos in exchange for burying the family's scandal and saving her father's job. Leo thinks he could've gotten more money out of it, and tbh I agree — 20 million yen is about $125,000 USD. These are rich people we're talking about here.

But then in Jin's affinity scenes, we see Frostheim students gossiping again, and they say that Yumiko's father has been fired for embezzling.

I can think of a few different ways to interpret all of this, but here's what I think is most likely:

Yumiko takes Tohma up on his offer to help cover up her family's scandal, and meets with him in the Frostheim vaults. He asks for a relatively low amount of money, because the money isn't the point. She underestimates him and takes the opportunity to search the vault for information while she's there. The chess guardians recognize her as a threat and chase her out, but Tohma sees only Lucas fighting with the guardians. He does not realize that they were initially reacting to Yumiko.

When the rumors go out, Tohma immediately realizes that Yumiko is behind it — and this is very stupid of her, considering that he's helping her out with a scandal that could ruin her family's reputation. However, Tohma tells Jin that "the friend who left your side" is responsible. There are a few reasons he might do this — he might think that Yumiko is working with/for the "friend." He might be trying to hide his own involvement with Yumiko. Or he might be hiding some other part of his plans from Jin. (Or something else, who knows?)

Whatever the case, Tohma doesn't retaliate against Yumiko... not yet, anyway. He lets things stand long enough for Leo to dig around for evidence. No matter how good Leo is with technology, this seems very careless for Tohma. He also doesn't strike me as the kind of person who is motivated by money, and he didn't ask for a lot of money in the first place.

I think Tohma was using the money as bait to get the spy to reveal himself — but wasn't anticipating some sneaky first year getting all up in his business. If Yumiko had kept quiet, Tohma probably would have left it at that. But she didn't.

In the aftermath, Tohma and Jin take very different approaches to dealing with Yumiko. Jin goes out of his way to make sure her punishment is lenient, even though he was the one directly affected. Tohma, however, pulls back and lets her fall sometime after Leo discovers the money. (Seriously, don't double-cross him.)

[plush-rabbit]

Word Count: 3.5K A/N: No name again!! Part Three this time. Woo! Um, I just miss writing. I have some request that I wanna do, and like honestly, i need to make time. And I'm slowly making time! So, one day. I wanna write an Adam chapter, but like idk. Like I could. I'm the writer, but like also, I wanna do this other one, and like i thought it was gonna be super quick, but ya know me. I like words and sounding deep. So who knows. It gets like updated whenever its slow at work, so one day.

-

You pace around the room that you occupy. It doesn’t feel like home. You’re afraid nothing will ever feel like home again. You look at yourself in the mirror, and trace your tongue over your sharpened teeth, and you can’t recall the change to them- whether they grew into fangs during your fall, or when you were in your unconscious state. 

“‘S probably why my jaw hurt so much,” you mumble to yourself.

Despite not showing much interest in most things, Lucifer has brought it upon himself to make your room as comfortable as possible. He’s brought candles, and pillows to add color. He’s brought you different types of creams and perfumes for you to try, telling you to let him know what scent you like best. The shower adjacent to your room is kept clean, and stocked full of sweet smelling soaps. Your closet is full of clothes, so soft that you played with the fabric between your fingers until you feared you’d ruin them with your nails.

While your back no longer aches like it once did, you still avoid looking at it. The morbid curiosity to touch it grows every second, but you can only let your fingers ghost against the edges of the scars, feeling the pulled skin against yours, chills making your body rise. You feel bile in your throat when you touch a scar that runs thin and farther down your back- skin that stayed stuck and only released when it was far too thin and weak to hold on any longer. 

It’s sensitive, and almost ticklish. The tags of shirts make you uncomfortable, and you gently pat yourself dry after showers. You stare at the fogged mirror after every shower, and you have yet to wipe it clean and turn around to see what you’ve lost.

Lucifer has assured you that it’s not nearly as rough as it once was. Perhaps he’s right about that. Yet, you hate that he knows what you’re going through. You hate that you can’t be angry at him, that you can’t throw a fit and tell him that he doesn’t understand. But he does. He’s one of the few that will understand what you’re feeling, and you can’t bring yourself to talk to him.

There’s a knock on your door, and you look away from the mirror. “Come in,” you say out loud, already knowing who is on the other side- speak of the devil, and he shall appear. You give a small smile as Lucifer walks in with a tray of food, taking careful steps to not let the drinks topple over. 

“I brought dinner,” he says with a smile. 

You sit on the bed, legs crossed and watch as he places the tray over your lap. “Thank you, Lucifer,” you say. There are two plates, two sets of cutlery, and two drinks. Once again, he’ll be having dinner with you in the confines of your room. 

Lucifer takes his place in the chair beside you, and with a wave holds the plate in his hand, carefully balancing it as he holds the silvered fork in the other hand. Your fingers wrap over the silver, as you poke and prod at the food. 

“I hope you like it,” he says. “It’s been a while since I cooked anything, so I’m hoping it’s good for you.”

You pierce the food with the prongs of the fork. “I didn’t know you cooked,” you mumble, before taking a bite of your meal. The taste is savory, melting on your tongue, and you cut another piece before even swallowing the first one.

“It’s been a while.” Silver clinks against porcelain in a melody, behind his words. “It’s been ages since I’ve had proper meals.” You catch his eye, and he clears his throat. “Running Hell is a bit of a task. Hardly ever lets me enjoy my peace,” he says quietly, nudging his food with the sharpened point of the fork. 

“I can’t imagine the type of work it takes to run it all,” you reply, wrapping your lips around another forkful of food. 

Lucifer hums in response, and you take a sip of your drink. He hardly ever talks about Hell in detail. He’ll focus the conversation on you, trying to pry out your interests and likes. At times, he’ll talk about his daughter, Charlie. He tells you how she’s off somewhere in the Pride Ring, about how she was when she was young, how he would have her sit on his lap and watch as he’d tinker in his office. The stories are always in past tense, and you never like hearing the sorrow that are entangled in his words. Not only that, there’s a lack of mention of his wife, despite the ring that he still wears. 

The conversation comes to a still, and you frown. 

Dinners in Heaven were hardly ever quiet. There’d always be some type of noise, some gentle hum of a song, laughter, talk about slaughter that made you queasy. You’d eat with Adam most nights. Some nights you were accompanied by Lute and you always welcomed those shared meals, where she’d sit beside you, her wings folded neatly behind her, compared to Adam’s prodigious wings which graced the floor. She’d remove her mask when dining, and would grace you with a gentle smile. 

Home was the only place you’d ever see Adam without his mask. The horns curved and the bright lights a warning against others, looking down on others with heavenly light. He’d wear his mask in public, it was loud and showed who he was. Newer souls always looked at him with awe, and he hungered for the way that they would trip over themselves to speak to him. They may not have known his title, but they knew he was important, they felt the power that he held, the authority that he carried. He was someone to be admired. He was someone that you wanted to be around with. 

Even though you were just an angel, you didn’t hold power that others didn’t already have. But Adam still chose you, and you chose him. 

You should have chosen to run away when you had the chance.

The food tastes bitter, and you drop the fork, the clinking making your flinch and turn your head. Your name is whispered, and a hand places itself over your arm. Your eyes are shut tight, and you feel like a fool. “Are you all right?” Lucifer asks in a soft voice.

You suck in your lip, teasing it between your teeth. “No, I’m sorry, Lucifer.” You shake your head and blink back the tears that threaten to spill over. Turning to him, you wipe at your eyes with the back of your hand. “I’m fine, I’m sorry. I was-” your voice wavers, and you cover your eyes with your hand- “remembering Heaven. I remembered how my meals-” tears drip down, and you wave your hand. “Oh, I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to cry.”

With a wave of his hand, the tray of food, and his own plate disappears from your sight. It’s quiet for a moment, and he pushes his seat closer to your bed before breaking the silence. “Do you think of Heaven often?” Shamefully, you nod. “What do you miss?” 

Adam. You peek at him between your fingers, and when he hands you a tissue, you take it wordlessly. “The view,” you answer. The tissue dabs at your eyes, and you let your hands fall beside you. Fingertips nudge against your hand, a silent encouragement to continue to speak. Your fingers jump, and there’s a sudden urge to take his hand in comfort. Rather, you let your nails scrap against the bedsheets.

“When I was still-” Lucifer’s voice pauses to take a breath- “I would sneak off to this forest. I’d watch all of his creations frolic among the fields. I’d have a few of my own creations rest against me. It was serene.”

You stretch your legs, and pull the blanket over your lower half. “I was a lower rank angel,” you start. “No one hardly needed me unless they wanted me to fetch something. But there was-” you bit your bottom lip and flicker your eyes towards Lucifer who listens with his attention on you- “an angel who would take me to see the stars.” You smile softly, and rub the corner of the tissue between your index and thumb. “It was a vast space, where the sky was lit by the radiance of the stars. It was the first time anyone thought of doing something for me,” you say out loud. 

“You were an angel, were you not?” Lucifer asks, his body leaning towards you, a hand wrapping around your wrist, and you let him take your wrist.

“Just an angel, nothing more. I don’t even know why he was so nice to me.” You smile at him, but you look away, smiling at the end of the bed. “I still don’t get it.” He was praised for so much, given everything and perhaps that’s what made his ego bigger than what it needed to be. “But he was kind to me.”

“Another angel?” He sounds surprised. You wonder what angels were like back in his days.

“A higher ranking than I,” you shrug with your answer. There’s a reason why he was able to get away with so much.

“For all that Heaven was, the views were ethereal.” You hum in response. It’s silent, and his shoes tap against the floor. “I’m sorry that Hell doesn’t have views like those.” His thumb arches over your wrist, and you dig your nails into your palm.

You stay silent beside him. Heaven’s land and warmth, nothing but a memory for you to return to. The room smells of rosemary and wine, and your blankets are thick in the stench of it. You turn to him. “Lucifer, why don’t we eat at the table?”

He stiffens at your voice, his mouth opening and closing without an answer. “I didn’t know you wanted to,” he replies.

“I’m stuck in this room all day, I want-” more is what you want, more than the four walls of your bedroom- “I want to see the other rooms. I’m not like I was before. I can move now.”

His eyes scan over your body, and with a nod, he clears his throat. “Okay,” he nods once more. “Breakfast will be in the dining room. I’ll be here to walk you at the usual time that I arrive.”

“Thank you, Lucifer,” you say kindly, a smile ghosting over your lips.

“You’re welcome,” he says your name softly, twisting meaning into the syllables and letting it fill the air.

-

Your room is shrouded in darkness, vast and consuming. Perhaps it’s because you’ve spent so much time awake in the night, that you can recognize what’s beside you, or maybe it’s your vision, heavenly eyes now able to see in the night, almost as if it were day. You aren’t sure which option brings you more comfort- that you’ve spent so long in a place that you should call home, or that parts of your angelic nature have contorted into something else.

Sleep has yet to take you into its arms. You lay awake, unable to do much else, hoping that if you’re still long enough then maybe you rest. However, you do nothing all day but read and draw in a book Lucifer had given you. The television remains in an opened box, pressed against a wall. He had attempted to attach it to the wall, but grew frustrated when he could not figure out the wiring. When you offered that he call someone who could, he just placed everything back in the box grumbling under his breath.

His pride is the reason you still rely on books and his company for entertainment. 

The scars on your back are no longer tender as they once were. They’re soft, and ticklish. You squirm against the cotton of the bed and feel a chill pass when you think of them for too long. Your arms coil themselves around you, fingertips tracing over the scarring lines. You wipe your hands on the comforter, filth still etched into you.

Your legs kick the bed, and you find yourself unable to sleep. If it were Heaven, you’d have Adam beside you. It would be hours until he finally rested, staying up until dawn peeked through the blinds in gold. He’d keep you company. Even if he was tired, he’d grumble and whine, but would continue to hold a conversation with you until he could no longer. 

Truth be told, it was rare for you to struggle to fall asleep. You had no trouble resting your weary head, but when you did, you at least had Adam with you. 

As much as other angels complained about not being given bigger tasks, you hardly minded them. You had no real power over anyone, no real responsibilities. The only real duty that you were given, was to calm Adam when he became crass- at least more so than usual. Heaven was blissful, the only worry being whether Adam would call you a crass nickname in public.

He hardly listened to anyone. He might have quieted down when a Seraphim or even Lute would give him a look, but when it came to you, he would mumble under his breath, still simmering, but at least he'd hold your hand. A chill runs through your body. In quiet moments, you can feel the weight of his wings over you, the heaviness, the softness of his feathers, how they would cover you like a blanket. 

Moments with him were plenty, never did you ever have to miss him unless he was called out. The few times you both were separated, he was bitter- snapping and complaining to anyone who was unfortunate to speak to him. and you felt pride at being the one that he wanted, being the one who could calm him. All these weeks- conscious and unconscious- is the first you’ve ever spent without him- without knowing that you would see him again. You wonder what he’s doing. The thought hurts, a sharp pain in your chest that makes it difficult to breathe. 

You wonder if he’s upset with Lute. A part of you wants him to be, to know that he did care for you, enough to be upset at another for hurting you. And the other part, hopes that he isn’t. You hope that he understood that it was a task given to her, that he doesn’t hold it against her. You hope that she doesn’t hold it against herself. You close your eyes, and your hands scratch against the comforter. 

You need to think of something else.

There has to be something else that you can think of. Something that doesn’t have to do with him. Anything at all would work. 

Mornings. 

How the sunlight would cast gold in the room, peeking between the blinds and making his wings shimmer. The warmth of the light would only encourage you to dig deeper into bed, pulling yourself closer to him. Your wings would brush under his, and they were never as grand as his were. Where yours were iridescent, and fit to your body perfectly, his shined in gold, carved by Father and molded to be fitting of the first soul to ascend to Heaven. 

You cry, and a sob escapes, whimpering past your lips. You need another distraction. 

Your wings. 

Think of how your wings were ripped from you. How Lute was the one to perform the severance and how Adam was adamant to watch. How he wanted to be there for you. You think of how you’ll never have your wings again. You’ll never fly again. There will  always be a scar to serve as a reminder of what was taken. And despite not having them, you can still feel them. You feel their weight, and in the mornings, you can feel a ghost of an ache, as if you’d slept on them wrong.

You sob, crying like a child and you press yourself against a pillow, trying to dull the cries. You can’t recall ever being so teary-eyed, so sad and lonely. Even after your creation, you were greeted with love and open arms, and past the time when you were simply an angel, you at least had Adam and Lute to keep you company.

Crying seems like a foreign concept. You never cried much in Heaven. Not out of sadness, at least. You hadn’t realized how exhausting it was to cry. You heave, whimpering and clawing at the bed sheets. Your chest is tight, bones constricting themselves around everything delicate, gold burning inside of you. When you laid in bed with Adam and spoke of your fate, and even when your wings were removed, you hadn’t cried like this. You shed tears, and you begged for forgiveness under your breath, but you accepted it until you cast out. Some nights, you wake up and you think it’s all been some horrid dream, only to be reminded when you wake to a ceiling that is not yours. 

Your door swings open, the back of it smacking against the wall.

“What’s wrong?” Lucifer asks, his voice tense. His presence serves as a reminder of where you are, and where you can never return to. “Are you okay?” He’s inside your room, and the door closes with a smack the further he goes. 

You are unable to answer him through your cries, mumbling incoherently. A hand places itself over your arm, and flutters away when you flinch. He sighs your name, and the side of your bed dips under his weight. “Do you want to be alone?”

You hiccup, and after a pause, you shake your head.

“Is it okay to touch you?

You nod, and turn over. Your hands grasp and pull at his clothes, you make a note that he hasn't changed out of his daytime attire, and that his eyes sag with exhaustion. Despite it all, you need him here. You want him here. His hand cups overs, and he lets his thumb arch over the back of your hand. Lucifer shifts under your touch, unable to be comfortable in your bed. Your nails scratch against the fabric of his clothes, fisting the shirt in your hand, and you need him to stay. 

“I’m not going anywhere,” he promises, another one of his hands cupping over the corner of your head, gently stroking you. “Just cry it out,” he whispers.

You cry beside him, the touch of his clothes barely enough to keep you satisfied. Your face is barely hidden between the pillow and the mattress. You weep, unable to catch a breath, unable to think of anything more than just missing home. 

“I hate crying,” you mumble, hiccupping and hiding your face.

“Yeah,” he breathes out, tracing shapes over your forearm, “you get used to it.” Your body still shakes, whimpers and other pathetic sounds filling the room. “I- Um, I remember that angels were rather touchy- always together in flocks, and never really alone, so I-” he clears his throat, and you peek up at him through teary eyes. “I hope I’m not overstepping, but do you want a-” His face deepens in color, and he squeezes your arm, unable to manage the word out loud. “Or I can get you a pillow or something?”

Your hands let go of him, and the push against the mattress. “Lucifer?” You say softly, picking yourself up. He hums in response, his eyes wide and focused on you. “Can you hold me?” You gasp, your chest tight. 

“Yes- Yeah,” he croaks. “Of course. Whatever you need- Oh!” He gasps, when you cling to him, your arms snaking around him, pulling at the fabric of his clothes. You hide yourself in the crook soft curve where his neck and shoulder meet, your dewy face kissing his exposed skin. “It’s-” you can feel his hands pat nervously at your back- “okay.” You pull him closer to you, desperate to not have him leave you. “You’re-” at the sound of another of your cries, his arms tightening around your shaking figure, hands pressed into the soft of your skin- “You’re okay. I got you, you’re safe,” he coos. 

He’s warm, and he holds you close to him, his head knocking gently against yours. Your cries soften into whimpers, gasping breaths tickling over his skin. In a room where the glow of red peeks into the room, letting glass and skin flame under a dim hue, you find yourself reminded of home. You find comfort in someone holding you, you find yourself held together by sin, stitched and handled with care. Hands are gentle against your back, the pressure against the scars enough to make you crave for more, to have him touch more of you. You let your eyes close, and you tell yourself that you’ll ask him to leave, but you need a few minutes where you can feel safe, where you can feel wanted.

[bonefall]

i'm ngl depicting thunder's prosthetic as a burden is pretty uncomfortable even if it is something some amputees experience because like. there's a huge stigma around prosthetics already you know? it's like having a parent forcibly strap a child into a wheelchair when they don't need it and having a horrible experience with it and that being your only character in a wheelchair. some full-time wheelchair users do resent their wheelchairs but when that's the only time you're bringing it up at all it feels like you're playing into our society's perception of wheelchairs and mobility aids in general as useless and best and divine punishment at worst. idk do let me know if i'm wording this wrong because i really do love better bones! it's just that this detail is... strange.

I mean, I'm open to feedback if that's not something I should do-- but I do actually have other characters in prosthetics and mobility aids! A lot of them! Thunderstar's actually the only one who ends up rejecting his own, because I also wanted to depict that it's bad to force a device onto someone who does not want one.

Especially in circumstances like Thunder Storm's, where that sort of device would be actively unhelpful for his lifestyle. It might help in open field environments like moorland, but then I got more feedback and realized that it would just make a lot of unwanted noise in a forest (since cats have carpal whiskers to help them figure out where to place their paws). Then I figured it was a good way to show how BB!Clear Sky doesn't actually listen to his son's needs and acts differently when he's not "grateful" enough for his gift.

But he's far and away from the only one with a mobility aid or prosthetic!

I haven't figured out Frog entirely yet, but he's going to be the first cat with a "wheelchair" type device, to set up a long line of cats through the generations improving on it (Probably not much more than a reinforced canvas or durable leather, as this was the age of very early flax processing)

Wildfur's the next in the big advancements, even making the Great Journey in his own and getting a side story based around Littlecloud and Cinderpelt collaborating over this

The device is then improved upon by Jessy for Briarlight, giving her a level of independence and confidence that she needs to finally cut her mom out until she learns how to behave

Deadfoot has a brace for his front paw because the joint is loose (it was based on a friend's carpel tunnel bracelet) which is affectionately referred to as The Bonker; his name is also now an Honor Title (Old name: Hoprunner) for inventing a battle move by distracting with his good paw, and then SLAMMING his other limb down hard on his opponent. It's called "deadfooting."

I think mobility devices are super important, usually massively improve quality of life, and I just enjoy designing them, so the choice to portray Thunder Storm's as negative was a very deliberate one that I did in response to what I thought was a desire in representation. Even the fact it's a hind-leg prosthetic was thought out, since those have a much higher satisfaction rate in humans than hand prosthetics, but in a cat would probably be the opposite.

Still, I'm not missing a limb, so now with all of that context presented, do you still think the same thing? Should I just add even more limb prosthetics to make the ratio of satisfied prosthetic users vs Thunder Storm even steeper?

Sunlit Frost is actually going to have a bite on his good paw go septic (the other side has permanent damage from the fire). I could have that paw get amputated and have Thunderstar "return the favor" for how Sunlit Frost created the prosthetic he rejected by helping him build his own. A pawsthetic, if you will

OR would it be better to just remove the subplot of Thunder Storm grappling with/rejecting a prosthetic that is unfitting for him entirely, and have all prosthetics be 100% treated as positive in the narrative?

[bakawitch]

Continuing this nonsense au

(I can't draw right now, and I need to get it out of my system)

Marinette is best friends with Chloé (they're the mean girls)

She's the daughter of the most famous/expensive confectioners in all of Paris

She's a klepto and pick pockets the ladybug miraculous from Fu before he could give it to an appropriate holder

Her hero name is Lady Vermilion

She is the sole defence against Hawkmoth for a while and is perceived very positively by the public

Sabrina takes on Marinette's canon role and is constantly victimised by Chloé and Marinette

Que Alya's transfer to the class, her and Sabrina become fast friends and they bond over their mutual love for Lady Vermilion

Sabrina passes one of Fu's dumb tests and gets the black cat miraculous - becomes Calico

After Fu sees Alya help Calico while Lady Ver is down from an akuma attack, he gives her the dog miraculous

Alya becomes Huntara and Calico and her partner up!

(Fetch has a different ability, I don't know what yet, but it's something stronger. Maybe it's something like stealing distance between the user and targets the ball hit? Dunno lol)

After the akuma gets defeated, Lady Ver welcomes them to the hero business and tells them that one day, they might be as great as her if they try hard enough, because this time they definitely just got lucky

Lady Ver is fake nice to them in a condescending and belittling way, she's very angry and concerned that they might steal her spotlight

Alya and Sabrina are unaware of each others' secret identities because they don't know each other well enough to know if they're acting out of character or trying to cover for something but they will figure it out eventually

They do hero stuff, and Lady Ver usually steals the spotlight

She usually only appears for very dangerous akumas and lets Calico and Huntara deal with the small fries

Enter Adrien- dun dun dun!

He's also a mean girl™

Marinette still has a thing for him, but Adrien and Chloé are too oblivious to notice her advances and

Something something happens, Marinette gets the opportunity to snatch the bee miraculous from Fu

She gives it to Chloé and reveals her secret identity to her, believing that as a duo, they have better chances to rival the rising in popularity cat and dog duo

Chloé becomes Queen Frelon

Seeing the increasing amount of miraculous in play, Hawkmoth recruits his disgruntled estranged son and gives him the broken peacock miraculous (father of the year, ladies and gentlemen)

Adrien becomes Fanfare and almost immediately gets sick after detransforming

(He's probably not a senti-baby here...? Idk)

Fanfare eventually recruits Lady Vermillion and Queen Frelon from the shadows to start his own cause because there is no way that he's going to give the ladybug and black cat miraculous to his incompetent father

Queen Frelon and Lady Ver start openly sabotaging Calico and Huntara and try to set them up as fall guys for Fanfare's plan

Love square is Huntara/Alya->Calico->Alya<-Sabrina

Felix arrives and eliminates Hawkmoth/Gabriel with Adrien/Fanfare's help after figuring out their identities

Felix gets the butterfly and becomes Jaded Majesty

Lady Ver and Queen Frelon fully switch sides, and Lady Ver uses her influence to start portraying Huntara and Calico as villains, and the heroes become wanted criminals

The new actual villain team carefully craft a plan through which they will practically have full control over Paris

The goal is still to get the black cat from Calico, but their wish is now to heal Adrien

And yeah, that's as far as I have this au roughly outlined XD

[fatuismooches]

Gosh i love the hc of the Fatui agents have a dedicated Fatui guide/handbook about each of the Harbingers 🤣 ngl it breathes a ton of fun stuff to think about.

For example, that one with Dottore having a sweet tooth (thx to his s/o for that info) and now everyone starts bringing some candies with them whenever they got assigned to him is probably the funniest one yet 😂😂

Also, i believe each of those handbooks have different size and pages according to which Harbingers on the front cover. I think Capitano probably have the least amount of pages, since he treats his subordinates well and then both Dottore and Sandrone probably have lots of pages, since.. you know.. they like to experiment on their own subordinates, etc. 💀. Also idk why, the more i think about it, the more it feels like these handbooks is like a "Survival Handbook" for the Fatui- 💀

-🥝

AHAHA ME TOO!! It really just gives a lot of brain rot, and it's funny to think about how each generation passes on the book to the next new recruits and stuff just keeps getting added. (A lot thanks to you. You have a habit of accidentally exposing them, don't you?)

Dottore and his segments will probably never recover from your little slip-up. At some point, they have to accept the new ways of the Fatuis, not just for them, but also because the agents like to offer sweets to you as well to show their respect. And you love that! Free food! Just don't think you can get out of every situation with a mere piece of candy...

Capitano definitely has the least pages regarding rules, but the longest pages as to why the recruits love him so much. He is highly respected after all, his soldiers could go on and on about how great of a leader he is. Some of these reasons were also provided by you as well - (Lord Capitano is an animal person. Lord Capitano feeds the stray cats and dogs of any nation. Lord Capitano helped a lost bird return to its nest. These facts are a courtesy of [Name].)

Ah Sandrone... the agents know you as the only one she doesn't have a bad temper with all the time. The one who knows how to prepare her tea the way she likes it and how to set the sweets on the table in the proper manner. She doesn't bother hiding her like for tea parties. She just really doesn't care what others think. (A big rule in her handbook is that if Lord Sandrone asks you to prepare her something, it's best to seek [Name] out first so you do it the correct way. Or risk failure. And then risk pain.]

It definitely doubles as a survival booklet, especially if you happen to work under Scaramouche... (the biggest rule - please fetch [Name] if you think Lord Scaramouche is about to electrocute someone.)

[m0llygunn]

Strat and Jag (Eddie Munson x fem!reader)

Summary: an unfortunate bout of eavesdropping rocks the boat of friendship between you and eddie, and ex-sailor steve helps steer you right...

Warnings: 18+ for mature content (not too explicit yet) and eventual smut, mature language, mentions of eddie trauma (parents/alluding to drug issues). Authors note: howdy this is part 2. also i take back the prologue being a prologue, thats just part one idk what im doing. This part and the 3rd part will be the main chunk of this series, then I have bonus chapters coming after! ty! wc: 6.7k+

01/02

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

The Fire of All Hells

“I can’t fucking do this anymore, holy shit. She’s killing me.”

“Killing you? I don’t think it’s that serious, man.” Gareth laughs.

“No.” Eddie says harshly. “If you heard what she was saying yesterday… holy fuck, you’d understand. She is killing me.” He groans. 

“Well, dude, you know what you could do?” Jeff replies sarcastically.

Eddie, Jeff, and Gareth were all setting up in the drama room and you figured you’d show up a little early with the cookies you made after Eddie left you yesterday. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

While you didn’t play DnD, you were an odd sort of an ‘unofficial’ member. You and Eddie have been friends forever so it was kind of pushed into your lap when he wanted to start his little club. And since it was a group of dimwit boys, you unwarrantedly became the founding mother of the club… alongside the founding father, Eddie— who, have it be noted, has zero organizational capabilities, not an ounce of time management skills, and absolutely no faith entrusted in him by any school faculty members. And for all of those reasons, that is why you were roped into this weird little club.

Eddie practically begged for you to be the one to ask the teachers to start the group. His far from perfect rep with them would have made the teachers obviously turn him down… but you on the other hand… you're liked enough, get good enough grades, and although have been tied to Eddie in numerous ways (including physically that one time when Eddie bought industrial level handcuffs, brought them to school to show off, cuffed you and him together to demonstrate, realized he lost the keys, and then you both spend the day cuffed together until Wayne got home to saw you free), you keep out of trouble for the most part. 

After a week of Eddie groveling and a few deals set between you too, you gave in. At the time, you were in your freshman year, and Eddie was promised Wayne’s old van once he got his license, so he set the deal that he would drive you to school and home everyday (which now that you're both in your senior year, it’s a promise that he has mostly held up overtime). He also promised his eternal friendship, which was already a given so that barely sweetened the deal. It’s kind of foggy at this point, being so long ago, but you’re sure he also bought you some other shit, probably stole you some beer too, because god knows you two were fiends for any alcohol back then. 

Since you had to ask to start up the club, it was your name under the club registry so it was always the drama teacher up your ass about making sure everything was cleaned properly, put away, no food left behind because of the mice… blah blah blah. So yeah… you’re practically the sole standing reason hellfire exists at Hawkins High but you don’t like to think about that… if you think too hard about it, you can’t help but cringe internally. You don’t mind their little group but you’d rather not be known as their leader— that’s all Eddie.

You knew Eddie because his dad and your dad were friends back in high school. The only difference between the two men was when your mom got pregnant with you, your dad cleaned up his life. Eddie’s dad on the other hand was the first to get a girl pregnant out of the two of them— which coincidentally happened in the same year; however, Eddie’s dad couldn’t quite give up his lifestyle. He tried for a bit, he really did, especially after Eddie’s mom skipped town, but it was just hard for him. It didn’t help when he got an injury doing some kind of labor job either. The doctors prescribed him some heavy pain medicine and that’s kind of when everything went to shit. 

As a kid you never noticed. At 8 years old, you were oblivious to the havoc being dragged through the lives of everyone around you. You thought it was all fun and games. Eddie had come and stayed with your family for a few weeks and you thought it was the best. It was like a giant sleepover, probably the closest thing you’ve ever had to a sibling. 

Then Wayne came into the picture. He was living down south, working as a truck driver. Once his brother got his sentence, he moved up, got the trailer, got a job at the plant, and started taking care of Eddie. He was a saint in the body of a mean-looking, tough talking trucker. Not really mean though, he’s a big ole softy, he just doesn’t let most people know that. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

You take a step further into the drama room, not purposefully trying to eavesdrop, you just didn’t mean to interrupt their conversation so abruptly.

“I can’t do that.” Eddie says flatly.

“You can dude. There’s no way she doesn’t know already. Everyone already thinks you’re together since you touch her nonstop. Seriously. You’re like, attached to her at all times.” Gareth says.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Eddie’s always been touchy. Always. Gareth’s not wrong, he always has some part of himself connected to you, whether it’s a knee under the table or an arm around your shoulder, that’s just how he’s always been. He’s never shied away from physical touch and that’s normal for you two after all these years. He was your first hug with a boy, first hand hold with a boy, first kiss, second kiss. It’s always been innocent enough though, he’s your best friend after all, it just so happens to be that he’s a boy. Not a boy boy. Just a boy. 

At 7 years old that’s when you two had first kissed. Then again at 10.

The first time, he was making you play some stupid game where he was a knight and you were a princess and according to him, obviously the knight had to kiss the princess. The second time he wanted to ‘practice’ playing spin the bottle. It was only the two of you so you had thought it was a dumb idea but it was Summer and you had been banished from the trailer after spending the weekend blasting the TV and probably stopping Wayne from getting any rest. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Summer of 1978

Eddie had spun the bottle 27 times before it finally landed on you. 27 times. You still remember counting each failed spin, laughter getting rowdier and rowdier at your best friend's terrible luck. The 27th time, he lit up like a damn Christmas tree when the neck of the bottle finally slowed, landing point blank in your direction. You couldn’t help the laughing fit that overcame you and you had thrown yourself backwards, clenching your aching stomach, head softly hitting the dirt floor of the forest clearing you two frequented. That’s when Eddie snuck up and stole the kiss. 

You would have let him kiss you, cause that was all part of the game after all. You both had agreed on the rules before starting, but that didn’t stop your surprise when his scrawny little 11 year old body fell over yours. 

You still remember distinctly the way he had grabbed your hands to pull them away from where you were holding your stomach. He pinned them both beside your head, similar to when you’d wrestle, and he looked at you with the biggest signature Eddie Munson smirk known to man. At this point, you were stronger than him still and could have easily tossed him off but it shocked you having him so close and so quickly. It took you by surprise so much so that it knocked all the giggles from you. You just laid there, in Eddie’s hold. His smirk fell and after a moment, he dipped his face to yours, and he kissed you for the second time. 

“Gross Eddie!” You shrieked when you felt his slimy tongue harshly poking past your lower lip and into your mouth. He started to get up off you but you were embarrassed, so you pushed him making him land harshly on his butt. 

“It’s called a French kiss.” Eddie stated matter of factly, face scrunched, hands rubbing over his lower back that stung from the impact of his landing. 

“It’s disgusting and you smell like cheezies.” You say pushing yourself up from the ground and wiping his spit off your mouth. 

“It’s practice.” He huffed. “And you taste like cheezies. It’s not just me.”

“I do not!” You shrieked before hauling yourself up into a standing position ready to stomp away from him. You were already embarrassed by Eddie shocking you into silence, then him telling you that you tasted like cheezies… even at 10 years old you knew that’s not what a boy would want to taste during a kiss. 

“We ate cheezies, Strat.” Eddie said, rolling his eyes at you. 

‘Strat’ was a nickname that your dad started. He was the guitar guy, and spent a lot of time teaching you and Eddie about music since you were toddlers. Once you got old enough to actually hold a guitar, he had two that he’d let you both mess around with; a Fender Stratocaster and a Fender Jaguar. The strat was a pretty baby blue colour that you adored, so naturally, you always called dibs on it, and Eddie got the red Jag. Your dad would call you both ‘Strat’ and ‘Jag’ and unfortunately the nickname stuck for you and you only— probably because you would whine and cry about the strat if Eddie tried to steal it from you. 

At the roll of Eddie's eyes, that really set you off. You turned, stomping your feet back to the trailer park.

“Hey, I like cheezies, Strat! Don’t go!” Eddie called after you. “We’re not done playing, you still have to spin!”

“I’m telling Wayne!” You screamed, running faster to the trailer once you heard Eddie’s clumsy steps behind you. 

“No! Please, don’t!” He yelled back pleadingly, making you smile to yourself revengefully. You heard his steps quicken behind you so you sprinted, making it to the door of the trailer in record speed. 

You threw open the door, startling Wayne who was sat on the couch, and just as you were about to speak you felt Eddie’s hand clamp around your mouth from behind. 

“Edward Munson. You take your hands off that girl.” Wayne warned sternly. 

“B-but-”, Eddie began before you interrupted him by elbowing him in the stomach.

“Yeah. Hands off.” You said turning to face Eddie as he held onto his stomach. You smirked at him and he sent you pleading eyes not to tell. You weren’t going to. That never was your plan, you just wanted to see him squirm as payback for him embarrassing you. 

“Ohhhhh Wayne.” You sang. Eddie’s eyes widening, his features turning increasingly pleading for you not to tell on him. 

“What in god's name happened to you, you’re covered in dirt, missy.” Wayne said ignoring you. He stood from the couch, making his way over to you before his hands were patting at your back trying to get the dirt off. Your face fell and you couldn’t think of a response. 

“She-she… we were playing a game and-” Eddie’s pleading look stopped and his gaze dropped to the floor. You could tell he was about to rat himself out. This boy couldn’t keep one secret from Wayne…

“I fell and Eddie helped me up.” You interject. Eddie’s gaze locked into yours, eyes wide before relaxing, sending you a small smile when he realized what you were doing. 

“Her mom’s gonna kill us both, boy. You better go find her some clothes so I can throw these ones in the wash.” Wayne huffed.

Eddie ran into the trailer to his room.

“Clean clothes too, boy! Don’t give her dirty stuff!” Wayne yelled when Eddie was taking too long. 

“I know Wayne.” Eddie yelled back, voice full of attitude. 

After a few moments, he emerged, with his favourite Black Sabbath shirt that your dad bought for him for his birthday last year and a pair of plaid pajama bottoms. 

“Go change, missy.” Wayne gruffed, patting you on the back. 

Back in Eddie’s room you both sat on his floor reading his comics.

“You look pretty in that shirt.” Eddie said, interrupting the silence.

“Shut up Edward. I still don’t forgive you for trying to french kiss me.” You say, cheeks turning hot in anger, prompting you to pick up the closest discarded piece of clothing from his messy floor to throw at him. 

“I'm sorry! It was just for practice.” Eddie groaned dramatically. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Before you both reached puberty it was all hugs, holding hands, sharing seats, sharing beds, just being innocently close to each other. After puberty his touchness did simmer a bit. Albeit not much though. Eddie still barely knows what personal space is, but he’s not grabbing at your hand every second like he did when you were kids. 

“I don’t always touch her! Besides, it’s always been like that since we were kids, it’s normal.” Eddie says, focusing his attention on setting up.

“There’s nothing normal about the way you act around her.” Gareth says with a laugh. 

“Yeah. You love her.” Jeff teases. 

“And that’s the fucking problem. Thanks for really rubbing it in guys.” Eddie says exasperatedly, throwing his bag of dice onto the table carelessly. 

“Just ask her out.” Jeff says, patting Eddie on the back as he slouches down onto the table.

“Oh great idea! Strat, I fucking love you. Please, go out on a date with me and potentionally fuck up our lifelong friendship. Great idea guys. Thank you so much.” Eddie says sarcastically. 

During Eddie’s spiel he had picked up his bag of dice again. Finishing his scornful remark, he had thrown it down on the table, this time the dice falling out and skidding across the floor, most of them landing at your feet. 

All three boys turn at once, moving to pick up the dice before they spotted you. 

“Shit.” Gareth says, filling the silence of the room. 

You look at Eddie and he’s gone pale, his whole face null of expression. 

“I- Hey.” You stutter, clearing your throat. “I was just gonna drop these off.” You continue, stepping forward to place the container of cookies on the table. 

“Hey Strat.” Jeff says nervously, being the first to snap out of his surprise. “You gonna stay today?” He asks. 

“No, no… gotta help my mom with.. something.” You lie. You were gonna stay. You told the little twerps you’d stay today, but you really have to go now. 

“I swore you told Dustin at lunch that you’d stay?” Gareth says, eyes narrowing in on you. 

“No, I-”

“Hey guys! What’s up?” Grant greets excitedly as he enters the drama room.

“Hey Grant.” You smile before taking steps towards the door.

“Strat? You’re going?” He questions, brows furrowing at you. “Dustin said you were staying and that you had something for us?”

“No, I have to go. Bye guys.” You say, turning quickly before exiting the room.

“What’s up with her?” You hear Grant say to the guys from the hall. 

“Strat! Where you going?” Lucas calls from the other end of the hall. You turn briefly, still walking backwards towards the school exit. 

“Gotta go home! I left cookies for you guys in there.” You say, putting on your best cheery voice before turning and walking as fast as you can out of the school. 

Shit. Eddie was right. He can’t just ask you out. That would be ruining a lifelong friendship. He can’t do that. He can’t like you. You guys are best friends. He can’t do that to you. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

At home you flop yourself on your bed. What the fuck are you gonna do?

Nothing. 

You’re going to do nothing. 

You’re going to pretend you didn’t hear that. Eddie doesn’t like you. He doesn’t love you. He’s not ruining your friendship— you won’t let him.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

You spend the weekend convincing yourself you made up the entire conversation you overheard. Eddie called 6 times since Friday evening, but you needed the time to erase whatever you overheard in the drama room from your memory. 

You spend Sunday evening contemplating if you should even take the ride from Eddie in the morning. He barely shows up Monday mornings so, who knows, maybe you’ll get lucky and won’t have to see him anyways.

You were wrong though. You decided to start your walk, and halfway there, you heard the familiar rumbling of his van approaching before slowing at your side. 

The van halts and you look over to see a fairly normal looking Eddie smiling at you. You try to muster a smile but you know it must look weird because he retracts into himself before motioning for you to get in. 

You stop, contemplating if it’s a good idea before you hear a car coming up the road that makes the decision for you. You quickly hop into the van, buckling yourself in as Eddie starts driving before the car behind him has time to honk. 

“Hey.” Eddie says.

“Hey.” You reply.

For a moment all that’s heard is the rumbling of the van engine. 

“Haven’t heard from you in a while.” He says cautiously.

“Yeah. Sorry. Was busy.” You lie. You spent the whole weekend in bed doing fuck all but thinking about the situation at large. 

“Busy?” Eddie asks. He knew you weren’t busy. You told him a few days that you had no plans. You were supposed to go over to his, but obviously that didn’t happen. 

“Yeah. Busy. My mom needed help with something.” You say, sticking with the same lie from Friday.

“Something?” He questions. Without looking at him, you can tell he's smiling.

“You’re just full of questions, aren’t you?” You say flatly, copying his same avoidant statement from Thursday night when he claimed to be helping Wayne with ‘something’. He huffs a breath out of his nose in what sounds like amusement, but you don’t think this is funny.

You don’t say more and neither does he for the rest of the ride. When you pull into the lot, you both get out before walking into the school. It’s mostly normal, except for the fact that it’s dead silent between the two of you. You don’t think it’s ever been this quiet between you.

When you see Robin, you use her as your escape.

“Robin!” You call. She turns to you and you wave at her. You start walking towards her and out of your periphery, you can see Eddie still trailing beside you. 

“Bye Eddie.” You say, stopping to turn toward him. You can’t look at him though, not in the eyes. You haven’t yet, apart from through the window of the van. 

“Bye Strat.” He says quietly.

You quickly push your way through the halls, leaving Eddie behind until you get to Robin.

“What was that?” She asks as soon as you’re close enough to hear her.

“What was what?” You question.

“What did you say to him, he looked like he was gonna cry?” Robin says furrowing her eyebrows at you.

“I just said bye?” You say.

“Just bye?” She says skeptically. You nod your head at her.

She grabs a book out of her locker, eyes still on you, clearly not believing you. 

“Steve said that those little twerps said something happened.” She says flatly. 

“Like what?” You ask hoping she has some drama that’ll take your mind off of all this.

“Something with you and Eddie.”

“Why’d they say that?” You roll your eyes.

“Cause something did happen?” She says, waiting for you to fill her in but you don’t. 

She stares at you, waiting for you to spill but truly, there’s nothing to spill. You let your eyes roam the hall, feeling awkward under her scrutinizing look before the slamming of her locker startles you. 

“You heard them talking didn’t you?” She asks.

“Heard who?” You ask and you physically feel Robin's annoyance rising. 

“Strat. Stop playing dumb.” She scolds.

“Robin. I’m not playing dumb.” You reply, sticking to your guns. It didn’t happen. You didn’t hear anything. Nothing happened. 

“Strat-” Robin starts, getting interrupted by the first bell. 

“Gotta go Robs! Good talk.” You say before bolting to home room.

You usually sit next to Eddie, but it’s fine. Nothing happened, right? Don’t need to be weird around him, right?

You cross the class to your seat at the back of the room, the spot next to you still empty. Little by little the class fills and by the time the second bell goes, you’re still left sitting alone at the back of the class. 

Halfway through the class, you’re still sitting alone. 

You try to focus on taking notes— especially now since you know you’re gonna have to teach this shit to Eddie who’s currently skipping, but you’re having a hard time focusing. 

When the teacher steps out of the class to get her forgotten worksheets from her office you lean forward in your chair, poking Jeff in the back. 

“Where is he?” You ask, when he turns.

“Seriously?” He laughs. You frown, not appreciating being laughed at right in your face. 

“Yeah. Seriously.” You reply sharply. 

“I think you know the answer to that.” Jeff says before turning forward again. 

Okay. Ouch. You always thought of Jeff as being the nicest out of the three older hellfire guys, but that was cold. 

You didn’t see Eddie for the rest of the day. Matter of fact, you didn’t see him until the next morning when he did the same thing. You had started walking and he drove up behind you, slowing, and you got in. The ride was in complete silence. Not a word or a glance. 

When you got to school, you parted ways immediately, without as much as a goodbye. Eddie didn’t show up to homeroom and Jeff didn’t look your way, not that you would have started a conversation with him after yesterday. 

You had seen Gareth and Grant walking in the hall and you waved. You know they both saw you but they kept walking, not reciprocating your wave, and it really fucking stung. 

That evening you walked home again. Alone.

The next morning, you walked the whole way to school. Alone. No Eddie in homeroom.

You were miserable. And to make matters worse, that morning, the drama teacher called you to his office over the intercom and proceeded to tear you a new one about how things were left in the drama room last Friday. You lied and said you weren’t feeling good and left things a bit of a mess, and that you were very sorry. By the end of the conversation, he was less so scolding you and more so giving you a pitiful look. Maybe you appeared as shitty as you felt, who knows, but you didn’t get detention so at least you got that win. He let you off with a warning instead but made sure to add that if it happens again this Friday, that’s it for your club.

Before lunch you set out to find the only hellfire members that you were certain would not give you the cold shoulder.

“Dustin! Mike!” You called, stopping them before they could enter the cafeteria. You really didn’t want to go in there, knowing Eddie would be there for sure. 

You jogged to catch up with them, both of them stopped right at the door. 

“Hey, do you mind doing me a favor?” You ask, trying to not seem like the shell of a person that you feel like. 

“Yeah? What’s up?” Mike replies. 

“Mr. Joels called me to his office and said if you guys leave the drama room like that again he’s gonna cancel hellfire permanently. Can you tell Eddie?”

“Can’t you tell him?” Mike says before Dustin hits him on the arm.

Dustin turns slightly, peering into the caf and your eyes follow, narrowing in on the person you’re always first to look for in a room. You feel whatever shards of a heart you have left dissolve when you see how miserable he looks too. 

“S-so can you tell him?” You stutter, trying to pull your attention away from Eddie. 

“Strat? Why didn’t you stay on Friday?” Dustin asks quietly.

“B-because.” You stutter again, feeling far too terrible to put up with any more interrogating and far too tired to keep up your lies.

“You heard him didn’t you?” He asks. Yeah. You heard him. You can’t lie to yourself anymore. You can’t pretend you didn’t. It’s not helping anyone. It’s not saving any friendship, because look at this. This isn’t preservation. 

All you can do is nod your head, eyes glued to your shoes.

“He likes you, Strat.” Dustin says. You shake your head, disagreeing. 

“He does.” Mike adds. You shake your head harder.

“No. He said he loves me.” You say, voice coming out croaky, lowering lip jetting out like you're about to cry. 

You bring the palms of your hands to your eyes, pushing until all you can see is black. You’re not about to cry in front of these freshies. You’re not. 

You hear the scuffing of their shoes on the floor before you feel a hand on your arm.

“Hey. It’s okay. Strat. Seriously, we can tell him. Don’t cry.” Dustin coos nervously, obviously not having the intent of making you teary eyed. 

“I’m not crying.” You huff, pulling your hands from your damp eyes. 

“No-yeah! You’re not crying. Don’t worry, we'll tell the guys.” Dustin says genuinely, his demeanor remaining soft yet incredibly nervous. Mike continues looking back into the caf, obviously looking for help from anybody. “So you’re not gonna sit with us?” He asks tentatively. 

You shake your head, not trusting yourself to speak. 

“Well, if you want to come back eventually, uh- we miss you.” He says. You laugh and both boys look taken aback. 

“Gareth and Grant pretended I didn’t exist when I saw them in the hall. Jeff laughed in my face when I asked about Eddie and then proceeded to give me the cold shoulder. They don’t miss me, trust me.” You say, exhaling deeply before standing up straighter, ready to end this conversation.

“We do miss you! Seriously.” Mike adds, looking nervous like it might not be the right thing to say. 

“Thanks guys.” You say, accepting their sentiments. “Tell Lucas I said hey and sorry for running off on him on Friday. And sorry to you guys too, I did say I was going to stay and then I didn’t.” You add before turning on your heels, heading off to the library without waiting for their reply. 

That evening, instead of moping in your room again, you decided to walk to family video. Making matters worse, your dad bought a new distortion pedal for his guitar and he’s been bugging you about getting Eddie to come over to check it out since Sunday. You're clean out of excuses and can’t handle him asking you again tonight, so getting out of the house seems like your best option. Robin usually doesn’t work Wednesday, which leaves Steve closing by himself. You’re not mad at Robin, you just can’t handle the interrogation.

Steve wouldn’t push you for answers like Robin would. He wouldn’t give you the cold shoulder like the other guys. He wouldn’t be the first person you’d hang out with, that of course would be Eddie but… yeah. Steve is a good friend though.

As soon as you walk into the video store you hear Steve calling your name from the register. 

“Hey! Long time no see!” He says happily.

“Yeah. How are you!” You ask, trying to return his chipper attitude but it comes out meek.

“Eh, living the dream.” He says, smiling. He rounds the counter, leaning against it, beside where you’re standing. “And what about you?” He asks, quirking a brow. 

“I’ve been better.” You say honestly. “Mind if I chill with you for a bit?” You ask, looking around the empty store.

“Not at all, in fact, I welcome it.” He laughs, his own eyes grazing the desolate isles.

You take a seat behind the counter with him, just talking about nothing. You can tell Steve’s waiting for you to bring something up though, he keeps giving you knowing looks whenever there’s a lull in conversation. 

When he turns away to help some customers you mentally give yourself a pep talk to talk about it. You’re not going to cry. 

“So… I assume the children and Robin filled you in?” You say, once Steve joins you again after the customers have left.

“That they did.” He says, smiling at you with a nod of his head.

“And?” You say, waiting for him to bombard you like Robin did.

“And what? What do I think?” He asks. You sit back, surprised by his response. 

“I guess.” You say shrugging.

“Well… you and Munson are close. Obviously. Totally and completely close. I can see why you’re like… y’know… freaked out or whatever. In denial, like Robin said.” Steve says, shrugging his shoulders, mirroring your action. 

You look up at Steve in total shock from his extremely validating answer and he just smiles back at you. 

“Don’t you think… Am I not.. in the wrong? I mean, it feels like everybody's mad at me… but like, I don’t know what to do?” You say quietly, stumbling through your thoughts.

“I don’t think you’re in the wrong. Feelings are complicated, there’s not really a right or a wrong.” Steve says genuinely, surprising you.

“Wise.” You laugh.

“Well, you know. I’ve had my fair share of feelings.” Steve laughs.

“How did you know when you- uh…” You trail off. Steve waits patiently for you to speak and you’re beyond thankful for it. “With Nancy, how’d you know?” You say, mustering you all of your courage. 

“I think that’s a little different because we weren’t close friends first, but… it’s hard to say. I guess I just really wanted to be with her, even if it was just hanging out. Thought about her like 24/7. All of that corny shit, like butterflies and blushing and feeling like you can’t breathe.” Steve says, grabbing a tape off the counter and fidgeting with it in his hands.

“Sorry for asking about Nancy.” You say, picking up his discomfort as soon as he starts playing with his hair, pushing it back over and over again.  

“Don’t worry about it, seriously.” He says, reaching a hand across and patting your knee in a friendly manner. 

“I guess, I’m just confused cause… I’ve never thought of Eddie that way, but… maybe I have?” You say, questioning yourself. 

“Hmm.” Steve hums, thinking to himself.

“Like, I feel like Eddie’s my person. He’s the only one that I want to hang out with all the time, and I always think about him… but the butterflies and all that other stuff you said, I don’t know. I feel like Eddie's just Eddie, he doesn’t make me nervous like that. 

“Well that could be because you’ve known him your whole life?” Steve gathers. “And I’m not trying to fuck with your head or anything, but you can’t say you don’t blush at stuff he does. I’ve seen it before.” Steve smiles at you genuinely.

“What?” You scrunch your face. You so do not blush because of Eddie. “When?”

“Halloween. Jonathon was taking all those photos and Eddie kissed you on the cheek for one of them. You seriously went bright as a tomato and there’s photo evidence.” Steve laughs.

You remember that night. You did blush, but you blamed it on the alcohol consumed… even though you only had half a beer at that point. You literally went hot all over and then you blamed it on not eating enough before drinking.

“Oh my god.” You say, mostly for yourself. Eddie had made you blush. He made you blush hard. 

“Am I right?” Steve says smugly. You reach across, hitting Steve on the shoulder but he swats you away with a laugh.

“I hate to say it Steve, but maybe you’re onto something.” You smile in disbelief.

“You people have no faith in me.” Steve says, faking hurt. 

All you can do is smile at him because things are finally starting to make a little more sense. 

“Well, want to keep going or are you tapping out of feelings?” Steve says, quirking his brow at you, making you laugh. 

“What are you? Dr. Harrington? PhD in love?” You joke, grabbing your own tape off the counter to fiddle with. 

“Oh yeah. Took a lot of heartbreak to get my PhD but hey, if it helps at least one person, maybe it was all worth it.” He laughs.

The conversation lulls for a moment but you quickly break it, deciding you’re not tapping out of your feelings, how could you when you’re so close to understanding?

“Do you think it’ll ruin our friendship? Like what if it doesn’t work out?” You spit out your worst fear, but it doesn’t even phase Steve.

“Well, from what I heard from Robs, how’s your friendship going right now?” Steve says cautiously with a softness to his voice.

“Horrible. I’m miserable. He looks miserable, but I haven’t really talked to him since last Thursday and even then he was acting weird.” You frown thinking about how Eddie looked in the cafeteria, slouched in his seat at the table, eyes all sad, not even talking to the guys— and Eddie is a talker, it’s not fucking normal for him not to be talking.

“Right. And you’re still confused about if you have feelings for him?” Steve asks genuinely, curious but not prying.

“I mean yeah. Like, I pictured Eddie in my life forever, but I never even considered it in that way or really any way at all. I never put much thought into it, ever.” You say honestly. 

“You don’t… you know.. think about him sexually.” Steve asks, grinning. You look down into your lap, shyly and you feel your cheeks heat but it’s an easy question you know the answer to.

“Truthfully? I always blamed it on him being so close to me. Like proximity planted all that shit in my head. And like… obviously I trust him and stuff so, like… if I thought about him like that, I always told myself it’s because I could trust him and that’s it.” You say, hiding in your hands. Steve grabs at your hands, before shooting you an amused smile. He’s so stupid, but this is fucking working, he’s actually making everything make sense. 

“So you’re attracted to him?” Steve says once your blush cools.

“Eddie’s fucking beautiful. I’ve never been shy to say that. Well, except when he was, like, going through puberty, that was scary.” You say widening your eyes, remembering how gangly and extra clumsy he was right after his growth spurt, and the awkward squeaky voice he had for an entire summer before his voice dropped. Steve laughs at you, clearly enjoying the terror that flashes over your face when you remember the first time you found his porn stash that somehow moved in right along with puberty. 

“And… correct me if I’m wrong but you’ve never had a boyfriend, right?” Steve says.

“You are correct.” You say sheepishly. 

“And why’s that?” He asks. You shrug, starting to feel nervous. 

“You don’t have to tell me. I’m not judging you for your choices, just might be helpful to think about?” Steve says softly, leaving it as an optional question with a way out if you so please.

“Yeah. I think, just… dunno. Whenever I’d think about going on a date, I’d always think about Eddie and that would kind of cut the idea short, if that makes sense? Not that I’d think about going on dates with him, just like, if I thought about going on a date it was more so, like… ‘well I usually hang out with Eddie so there’s no time’.” You ramble, nerves getting to you.

“Makes total sense. But you don’t think you associated Eddie with dating because…” Steve leads, leaving open space in his point for you to conclude.

“Because I want to date Eddie?” You say out loud, trying to piece together the puzzle that you’ve been recklessly throwing the pieces around to for far too long. 

“Once again, I’m not trying to make you think any particular way. Just helping you get to your own conclusions. Think of me as an impartial mediator.” Steve says, standing up from his spot, starting to pile some tapes back into a cart. You stand too, starting to help him since you’ve stolen so much of his time. 

“You really should consider getting a PhD or something, cause damn. Much to think about.” You laugh. “When did you get so wise.” You joke, pushing at his shoulder. 

“Yeah. Definitely would never qualify for a PhD, but thanks.” Steve laughs, placing the final VHS from the counter into the basket. “Now, want to do returns with me? Either that or we leave them for Robin tomorrow and when she chews me out I'll totally blame it on you so…” Steve says, tilting his face at you, raising his brows waiting for your response. 

“Already had Robin chew me out enough.” You smile, grabbing the return bin for Steve. 

You ended up staying with Steve until close. After he dropped you off at home, you spent the whole night thinking about everything you talked through with Dr. Harrington. 

Even after a night of contemplation, you kept thinking about it into the next day. You thought about it as you walked by yourself to school, sat through home room alone, ate lunch alone, walked home alone, and spent the evening alone. 

You like Eddie. 

It’s so fucking clear now. 

I mean, every time you’ve ever pictured your future? It’s always been with Eddie. Every dirty thought, every wet dream, every time you touched yourself, it’s always been about Eddie. You don’t go on dates and you’ve never cared to, because you have Eddie. Eddie is your person though and through. 

You don’t just like Eddie. You love him. 

And when that thought crosses your mind, you feel sick. Feels like someone is both tickling you and also absolutely bludgeoning you from the inside out. Is this what butterflies are? Holy fuck. 

When you think about Eddie spilling his guts to Jeff and Gareth in the drama room, you get that feeling and, god, is it horrible. But also… it makes you giddy?

You think about Eddie and suddenly you can’t wipe the stupid grin off your face. You think about his eyes, his nose, his stupid jokes, his laugh, and you get that fluttery feeling.

Deeper into the night you think about Eddie’s lips. You think about his hands, his arms, the way he always is touching you, the ways he could touch you, and you get a different feeling. Like a heat brewing in you. A desire, a neediness. Sure, you’ve thought things about Eddie, but never this purposefully. It makes you squirm in your bed until you get up and go grab water to cool yourself down.

You wake up befuddled with feelings. Like Steve was a fucking train conductor and you just got run over. 

It doesn’t help that you remembered that you kind of fucked this up already. It’s Friday. It’s been a whole week since you overheard him. 

It’s barely been 24 hours of you feeling so full of feelings. If Eddie was sure enough to admit he loved you to the guys, how long has he been feeling like this? If he’s felt anywhere near the way you feel now, he must have been drowning. And you were just letting him. And now, you’ve made him go a week, knowing that you know that he loves you, and you just went awol. 

Your mind goes to what he said in the drama room. 

“She’s killing me.” 

You’ve been killing him. It didn’t make sense at first, but now it does. It makes perfect sense and it took you until 5PM on Friday night to understand it after a long day of skipping school, laying in bed, and stress baking. And you need to stop it. 

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ty <3