#i wish i was like confident to run outside but im so scared of being harassed

[gayspock]

sigh i wanna start exercisingmore bc i feel -_- not getting movement in but its like theres nothing i can even do right now.. :(

[transdib]

every day i live in a passive limbo, waiting for the moment i suddenly feel better and can confront my anxiety, paranoia, and loneliness.

i feel like i have been shattered, and left in pieces with no glue to be put back together.

every day my existentialism and history of being gaslit dominates my brain and i can never make sense of my thoughts and feelings. i am constantly second-guessing myself, and implanting intentions that weren't previously there. i feel like i am required to have constant self-awareness, and to not have so means that i am Obviously Insane and Unsalvagable.

people on the outside would think im just a very holistic thinking person. which is true, and can be a good thing. but honestly? it's detrimental to how i perceive myself. i cannot unabashedly live in the moment of anything. i am, by default, viewing myself from a third person perspective in a hyper critical way. i feel afraid to fall into any category of people or labels, because to claim anything about myself is felt to either be a lie, a mockery of people who are "really" that thing, or it's attention seeking (which of course is the worst thing you could ever do right?)

even claiming to be existential causes a fear and anxiety that i am being pretentious or not self aware that it's a very human experience. my detachment from the world, my trauma, my existentialism, none of it is important or matters because others experience it too.

i cannot begin to describe what gaslighting does to the brain.

what it's done to me.

i dont even wanna claim ive become very isolated because others also experience it. id say the lockdowns from 2020-2021 triggered this, but i think more and more and realise that i wouldve done this when my mum died, or even earlier had i not had a confident person with friends take me under their wing.

i feel my whole life has come into question. i feel like my old home, my old life, my friends and pet and loved ones, dont exist anymore. i feel like im a dead person, looking back on their life and realising who i really was. all the mistakes and inconsiderate behaviours i ever done. it just fuels the fire of the gaslit brain.

everything i ever do or feel is a contradiction. i dont matter to others, but i also have more of an impact on others than i realise. the impact i have matters more than what im ever feeling, and for me to not be self aware of that clearly demonstrates how selfish and horrible i truly am.

maybe it's why people think im such a giving, non-judgemental, and sweet person. im not. im angry. im subjugated. im frightened. like a deer in the headlights, i have no choice. im easygoing and agreeable because i am scared of disagreeing or giving my thoughts through normal debate. because doing so in the past has caused assumptions about me, or intentions skewed or created. my words did not matter, but also they did.

i dont know how to just. start talking to people again. i have been given advice from people who have dealt with isolation but. i know the secret is to challenge yourself and do things even when you dont feel ready, because youll never feel ready, but how? i have lost so much. i dont have the support i need to do something so brave. because i am a coward who avoids and runs away. thats probably manipulative for me to do anyway. ive dug myself into a hole i cant climb out of. ive literally made it worse for myself for no reason. and now i cant even face the consequences of my own inaction.

but why would i wish for people to be there for me when i cant even be there for them? i know i would be there for them, in a heartbeat, but i cannot right now. thats selfish and manipulative to say i guess but. it's not fair that others dont get considered as a result of me not considering myself. mental illness makes you selfish. it makes you not a good friend.

i want to be a real friend.

dont wanna break when i bend.

.....

i have a therapist im gonna be seeing every 2 weeks. if this doesnt work out, then idk what i'll do. i have settled for the most part, and when life feels good, when my roots are grounding and growing in england, it feels good. i dont have many friends here, but i am happy with my partner and his friends, but it feels like i have so many loose ends and a life i have left behind that i cant face. and i am guilty when i experience happiness, let alone share it. because that doesnt align with my narrative that im suffering. which i am, but, i am also trying to survive and live in the life i currently have.

i guess that's what happens to the gaslit brain.

but i have to believe things will get better.

because if i don't

then what?

[godsofhumanity]

BOOK XXII | HOMER'S ILIAD | LITERATURE REVIEW

SUMMARY: Outside the gates of Troy, Hector stands alone to face Achilles. After a long battle of running around the city, Hector is deceived by Athena, and turns to face Achilles. Achilles defeats Hector at long last, and fixes his corpse to his chariot. Troy mourns Hector's death.

previous book / all books / next book

how could i not discuss Hector's death in his own post? no shortcuts today... just Book XXII.

all my previous analyses are based on Samuel Butler's prose version of the Iliad, but if you are curious about the regular epic poem style of the Iliad, i've actually already done the analysis for Hector's death (with a bit more detail than what im covering here in this post), and you can read that here if you wish.

without further ado, let the tears begin.

firstly, we open with the rest of the Trojan soldiers within the city walls- none are ready to come out and face Achilles with Hector- not Polydamas, not Aeneas, not Deïphobus.

Homer paints for us a really terrible and heart-breaking scene of Hector's family begging him not to go out and face Achilles- Priam even "tore his gray hair as he spoke" and Hecuba attempts to appeal to Hector as his mother, but still, we are told that they "moved not the heart of Hector".

i think this is a really important scene because it establishes Hector's noble resolve. even though he sometimes make terrible decisions, and sometimes he even runs away from the enemy because he's frightened, this scene is the real Hector.

"Thus did [Priam and Hecuba] with many tears implore their son, but they moved not the heart of Hector, and he stood his ground awaiting huge Achilles as he drew nearer towards him. As a serpent in its den upon the mountains... waits for the approach of man- he is filled with fury and his eyes glare terribly as he goes writhing round his den- even so Hector... stood where he was, undaunted."

we have this comparison of Hector waiting for Achilles against a snake waiting in its den.

the phallic imagery of the snake here is an indicator of Hector's masculinity and strength- it's a representation of his virility, and perhaps his cunning also. still, it's interesting that Hector here is associated with a snake and not something bolder and braver like a lion, for instance.

i think this is because this is just the start of the battle- even though it's Hector final scene, he undergoes great character growth/development in Book XXII, learning from his mistakes even in the face of death.

snakes have been universally associated with immortality and wisdom thanks to their trait of shedding skin which creates an illusion of never-ending life, and i think that, just as the snake continually sheds its skin, so Hector is also always shedding his past-self and growing as a person, as Book XXII will demonstrate for us.

now, even though Hector puts on a brave show, Homer reveals to us the inner workings of Hector's heart, and he is scared. he's nervous. we have Hector anxiously waiting for Achilles to show his face, and all the while, Hector contemplates returning to the gates.

furthermore, he reflects on his past decisions, notably, his refusal to pay heed to Polydamas' advice when Polydamas recommended the Trojans repeating. Hector says to himself:

"I dare not look Trojan men and Trojan women in the face, lest a worse man should say, 'Hector has ruined us by his self-confidence.'"

we have an acknowledgement of faults here- Hector acknowledges his arrogance, he acknowledges that his recklessness and ego have cost Troy greatly.

i think it's also important to recognise that at this point in the book, Hector doesn't know that he's going to die for sure. he's still hoping that Zeus is on his side and that he can win this. recalling this fact, i think it makes Hector's self-reflection all the more potent.

it's so important that Hector wins this fight not only to save Troy, but so that he can redeem himself and once again be worthy of being Troy's protector.

in Hector's self-reflection, he is at odds with himself, and his fear of death becomes evident. as he acknowledges his past mistakes, he also considers how he can best avoid conflict with Achilles, giving the Achaeans Troy's treasures as a trade for his life:

"What if I were to promise to give up Helen... and all the treasure that Paris brought with him in his ships to Troy, aye, and to let the Achaeans divide the half of everything that the city contains among themselves?"

it's such a terrible thing for Hector to even consider sacrificing his city's dignity by giving away its wealth and treasure for the sake of his own life, but the fact that Hector considers this an option, even momentarily, only emphasises how human he is. Hector isn't infallible- he is unsure of his fate, and it scares him. personally, i think this makes Hector easier to relate to, and easier to feel sympathetic for.

however, Hector's senses return quickly, and he knows that Achilles will not be dissuaded. so he prepares himself to fight for Troy, at the risk of his own life, regardless of his personal fears.

as Hector's reflection concludes, Achilles finally appears on the scene:

"As a mountain falcon, the swiftest of all birds, swoops down upon some cowering dove- the dove flies before him but the falcon with a shrill scream follows close after, resolved to have her- even so did Achilles make straight for Hector with all his might, while Hector fled under the Trojan wall as fast as his limbs could take him."

the Epic simile here is employed by Homer to indicate the ferocity and violence of the battle. i think the most important thing featured in this simile is the comparison of Hector to the "cowering dove" and Achilles to the mountain falcon, "swiftest of all birds".

it's obvious that the falcon is a great hunter, and so, the comparison between Achilles and such a mighty bird is self-explanatory. but the comparison between Hector and the dove is important also- doves are symbolic of purity, and are not exactly famous for their hunting prowess, so it makes sense that Hector, while overcome by fear and in the middle of running away from Achilles should be associated with the dove, but more than this, we should note that doves are the sacred animal of Aphrodite.

so the dove holds greater symbolism than we first realise- it was Aphrodite who favoured Troy because of Paris, and so it makes sense that her motifs are present in Hector's battle.

i think it's also worth noting that in some translations, Achilles is associated with a hawk and not a falcon- but honestly, this doesn't change much. in many ancient religions, eagles, hawks, and falcons are set apart as great and majestic birds due to their size and awesome hunting skills. Achilles' association with the falcon/hawk simply represents the idea that Zeus, whose sacred animal was the eagle, is on Achilles' side, and emphasises his great skill as a warrior.

we leave the battle scene momentarily and go to Olympus where we witness a conversation between Athena and Zeus. Zeus is minded to save Hector for all the gods pretty much love him, but Athena protests because then Zeus would be defying fate for a mere mortal, and it also wouldn't be in Athena's favour for Hector to win.

i don't have any technical analysis for this scene, though it does make me wonder what and where exactly do the gods draw the line as to whether they are preventing someone's fate or not?

i personally feel that Athena's argument is weak- in a previous book, we saw that Aeneas was almost certainly going to die at Achilles' hand, but Poseidon felt bad and saved his skin. was that not changing Aeneas' fate? or is it different because Aeneas is a demigod, with Aphrodite for a mother? still, we also saw that Paris was saved from Menelaus in an even earlier scene, and he doesn't have any immediate divine parentage. even earlier still, Achilles was going to kill, or at least badly injure, Agamemnon had Athena not been sent by Hera to stay his hand... isn't this also interfering with fate? so, im not really sure what the gods consider to be messing with fate, or just fulfilling it. but i'd be curious to hear anyone else's thoughts if they have them!

anyhow, after this, we go back to Achilles and Hector:

"Achilles was still in full pursuit of Hector, as a hound chasing a fawn... the fawn may try to elude him... but he will scent her out and follow her up until he gets her- even so there was no escape for Hector from [Achilles]."

in this second Epic simile, Hector becomes a fawn, a baby deer, which symbolises his vulnerability and weaknesses. note that it's not simply a deer that Hector is compared to, but a baby deer to emphasise that Hector is the prey right now.

meanwhile, Achilles becomes a hound, a hunting dog, to recognise his battle prowess, and emphasise the difference between the two warriors.

and now, the battle becomes even more intense. so far, Hector has merely been running away from Achilles, but now, Athena descends to the field and takes up the guise of Deïphobus, Hector's most beloved brother.

as Deïphobus, Athena convinces Hector to stop running and fight.

earlier, Hector has, on occasion, recognised the gods when they appear to him, even in disguise, but here, Hector does not. in fact, he is moved by the courage of "Deïphobus" in coming beyond the walls to see him, and listens to his advice... to his peril.

the fact that Hector doesn't recognise Athena emphasises greatly that now the gods have truly abandoned him. if Hector wasn't sure about his fate previously, he is sure now. and when Hector turns around to call Deïphobus' name, and finds his brother not there, he confirms this:

"Alas! the gods have lured me on to my destruction... death is now indeed exceedingly near at hand and there is no way out of it..."

now, this isn't really related to my analysis, just an observation.. maybe a little bit of a biased observation, but i just think it's so ironic that Athena should protest against Zeus interfering in the fight because of "fate", but then she herself goes down and helps Achilles. it just irritates me so much. if it's "fate" for Hector to die, then why'd you come down, Athena? ridiculous. can you tell who my least favourite characters are?

anyways. when Hector turns to face Achilles finally, he says this:

"I will no longer fly from you... Three times have I fled round the mighty city of Priam... but now, let me either slay or be slain..."

the number 3 represents birth, life, and death, and these three stages are reminiscent of Hector's own battle with Achilles- first, he questioned his resolve at the start of the fight (birth). then, Hector ran around the city, always with his back to Achilles in fear, but now, he is growing, and has resolved to stand and fight (life), and soon, the battle will conclude, and Hector will die (death).

something important to note is that once Hector has done away with his fear, and is ready to fight Achilles properly, in Homer's similes and metaphors, Hector no longer assumes the role of the prey.

"As [Hector] spoke he drew the keen blade that hung so great and strong by his side, and gathering himself together he sprang on Achilles like a soaring eagle..."

from a cowering dove, to a fawn, Hector is now a "soaring eagle". in this context, the eagle association does not symbolise Zeus being on Hector's side, but rather, that just as Zeus represents leadership, justice, and strength, so Hector, in his bravery, has come to symbolise that for his people.

and then... finally, the battle concludes, and Hector dies :((((

but, Book XXII doesn't end here. as Achilles desecrates Hector's corpse, we are reminded once again, of the pivotal moment that brought Achilles and Hector to this point; the death of Patroclus:

"[We have] overcome this man, who has done us more hurt than all the others together... Though men forget their dead when once they are within the house of Hades, yet not even there will I forget the comrade [Patroclus] whom I have lost."

in Butler's interpretation of the Iliad, i feel that this little speech of Achilles' is a little lax- i've read versions where Achilles description of just how great Hector was of a soldier is a lot stronger and more meaningful, and i think that's really important because it emphasises just how much Troy has lost through Hector's death, and establishes the idea that without Hector, Troy has no hope.

nevertheless, Achilles' emotional promise that he will never forget Patroclus reminds us of Achilles' human side- though he has been savage and unrelenting throughout this whole battle, this mention of Patroclus reminds us that Achilles isn't simply a rage machine, but that he is in pain. i think it also confirms for us once again how important and how valued Patroclus was to Achilles.

both Hector and Achilles are fighting for the things they love. it's just another cruel reminder about how awful and horrible war is.

and if you still had doubts about whether war really was all that bad, Homer paints for us another depressing and gloomy scene- Hecuba and Priam learn of Hector's death and there is a great chorus of wailing and screaming and crying, and all the while, they are watching the man who killed their son defile his corpse, and drag it in the dust:

"Thus was the head of Hector being dishonoured in the dust. His mother tore her hair, and flung her veil from her with a loud cry as she looked upon her son. His father made piteous moan, and throughout the city the people fell to weeping and wailing. It was as though the whole of frowning Ilium was being smirched with fire. Hardly could the people hold Priam back in hot haste to rush without the gates of the city."

interestingly, before the gods have even offered their counsel to Priam (see Book XXIV), Priam has already made up his mind to go out to Achilles and beg for Hector's corpse to be returned.

how great must Priam's pain have been for him, as a king, to, not even minutes after his son dying, to already be ready to go and meet his son's killer face-to-face, without regard for his own safety, and beg for mercy? the imagery of Priam rushing out, and the people almost unable to stop him from meeting Achilles if it had not been for the city gates being where they were is powerful, and emotional.

and then, the icing on the cake. Andromache learns of her husband's fate.

when we go to Andromache, she is busy at her loom, and she calls for her maids to prepare a warm bath for Hector... but just as they are in the midst of doing so, she hears the foreboding wails from the wall:

"She heard the cry coming as from the wall, and trembled in every limb. The shuttle fell from her hands..."

the shuttle is the tool that gets passed through the threads in order to weave, so Andromache is still in the middle of her weaving when she hears the cry.. and even though she doesn't know as yet what has happened to Hector, she drops the shuttle, and it's almost as though in her heart, she already knows that her husband isn't coming back. Homer hasn't written it, but you can almost hear the shuttle fall to the floor and echo in a terrible silence...

and then she sees Hector's corpse being dragged around the city like a broom for dusting:

"Her eyes were then shrouded as with the darkness of night and she fell fainting backwards. She tore the tiring from her head and flung it from her, the frontlet and net with its plaited band, and the veil which golden Aphrodite had given her on the day when Hector took her with him... after having given countless gifts of wooing for her sake."

when she sees Hector, Andromache tears of her veil, and i think it's very important to notice that it's the veil that Aphrodite has given Andromache- she discards Aphrodite's gift and it's almost as though Andromache is discarding Aphrodite herself, as though she is rebuking Aphrodite.. the gods are evidently not on Troy's side, but now, through Andromache's rejection of Aphrodite's gift, we confirm that even those who favoured Troy can do nothing to save the city now.

it's a somber scene lacking in hope filled with a dreadful sense of foreboding.

in Andromache's speech, we are reminded of Hector's son, Astyanax, and of the terrible fate that awaits him as an heir of Troy, and the son of Hector.

unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, Astyanax's fate is not mentioned in the Iliad.. but in most versions, he dies- Pausanias affirms that Neoptolemus, son of Achilles, throws Astyanax as a baby from the walls (in an awful mirror of their fathers' battle before them). in some Greek vases, Astyanax's corpse is used to beat Priam to death... either way, the end of Troy is certain.

at the very end, Andromache promises to burn all of Hector's royal clothes:

"... it is of no use to you, for you can never again wear it..."

the burning of the clothes is more symbolic than we may realise, or perhaps im just depressed and im reading too far into it... but by burning Hector's clothes, it's pretty much set in stone that there will never be another like him- Hector has come and gone, and just as his clothes will never again be worn, so there will never be a defender as great as Hector... not even his own son, for he will never reach an age where his father's clothes may fit him.. he will die before then, and thus, there is no hope for Troy.

and thus concludes Book XXII.

[creativebrainrot]

open journal entry #idk i lost count lol

chatter about friendship as a concept to me and my mental state i guess?? idk man i proofread this like five times and i dont even know what i said anymore 👍

i feel like i dont always communicate myself well and that I come off like i only care about fandom sometimes. I worry about a lot of stuff but only time will tell and I'm not on borrowed time or in any kind of toxic situation anymore so I finally have room for worries to just be worries.

light mentions of abuse, and my abusive father

I worry a lot. I worry I won't get the chance to become closer with people whose friendship I value a lot. I worry I'll get left behind or be forgotten. I worry I'm annoying, that I talk too much, that I've mis-spoken too often and all of that shit.

I've spent so long feeling like I'm living on borrowed time that will run out sooner than I think, that it bleeds over into my perception of stuff like friendship. it ends up making me feel like I have to start to "speedrun" the "correct milestones" while I "still have the chance." that I'll fade from the lives of people I'd really love to become closer with one day. And it's just an anxious feeling, I don't ever act on it. It's just kind of There, in the back of my mind.

I hate that I had to deal with a father who weaponized my honest vulnerability every chance he got so cruelly, that now I have to fight through so many layers of panic every time I want to say something as simple as "im glad I met you." And I never say it because of how much it hurts. It hurts to be vulnerable and honest like that. It's not bad if I get an opportunity to say something like that, I'll leap on those with ease. But if it's just me, offering that vulnerability all on my own, I can't do it. Not yet.

And I know that it's the warped perception I was left with from all his bullshit he inflicted on me that causes that panic, and it will fade eventually. I've unlearnt more than I can list here since making friends last December.

I wish I had more to share about myself because I think that would make it easier for me to feel like I'm showing that I genuinely care about my friends beyond screaming about ocs. And, y'know. It'd be nice to have a life I like enough that I want to share it. I often worry that I don't come off like I do care outside of that. And I do, I just don't really know how to show it yet. I'm not very good at starting conversations yet. Atleast, I don't have enough confidence TO start conversations yet.

It's a bit of a silly worry but I've struggled with feeling a lot of fear about "being left behind" for a long time. It bleeds over into my perception of friendship. I get frightened that I'm "not doing it right" or that just generally I'll be left behind or forgotten or people I'd like to get closer to will lose interest before I can tell them that I feel like that.

It's hard to be the one to start conversations about life because I have genuinely never had a real life social life yet. I haven't had jobs, I haven't been in school as I was home-schooled, I haven't had a chance to make friends my own age in person ever. All that lack of experience means I don't really know how to talk about what I conceptualize as "life things/topics."

There is no "one size fits all" approach to friendship as a whole, and I know that. I just, get scared. About "ideas" I guess? It's just anxiousness. General worry.

It's hard to not worry at least a little bit, when I've never had friends before. I had one when I was 8 for about 2 months if memory serves. They moved away shortly after I started talking to them. I never found another person my age I really clicked with. I was too scared of social media to use any of it. I never consistently talked to other people, that's a new thing that started last December.

I guess my real worry is just that I won't get a chance to grow closer to friends I really really want to. My worries will ease when I have the confidence to start or atleast attempt to start conversations with people. It petrifies me for now, I've kind of had an idea in my head of "not being good enough to be confident" in myself and my interests. Insecurity is a big thing I'm grappling with lately. Slowly but surely I'm finding solutions.

Idk if there's a point to all I've said. I guess, I worry that I don't properly show that I care enough. I wanna do better with that. I worry that I come off like I am only interested in fandom and fandom-adjacent stuff.

The main thing that causes me to worry that I'm on borrowed time, is the kind of games my father would play. He'd treat me normally for a week before going back to ignoring me and making me feel insignificant, invisible, unwanted and annoying. Then he'd be back when he wanted his ego stroked. Whenever he wanted to feel like "a good father" again he'd be back and treating me normally.

I have trouble sometimes with reminding myself that this time, I'm not on borrowed time.

I can just ask how they're doing when I think of it. I'm just too scared to at the moment. But, like a lot of shit so far, I'll move past my fear.

It'll get easier. DMs are way less scary now than they were just a couple of weeks ago. Step-by-step. I have the freedom and safety to take it step-by-step now.

[lavenderahs]

"I don't understand why he intimidates you"

warnings - none

just quick outpost michael fluff lol.

taglist - @kitty4860 @mllxngdonswife @cxdy-fxrn @d3monslust @brooklinn13 @forevercountess

it was my 108th day at the outpost. the slimy cubes, the candlelit halls, the greys, it was all so depressing. i was one of the few purples at the outpost. somedays i wished i would have died from the blast, before they locked us all up in here. the pain in my heart eased, just a bit, when i heard the tall mans proposal. his golden locks and sharp jaw, gave me a sense of comfort. the others were timid around him, scared of his low tone and seriousness. "there is a safe place, where you can last centuries. you just need to be to the cooperate and i's standards" miss Venable seemed suspicious to his offer, maybe because she has a chance of being denied. coco seemed quite confident that she'd be accepted to the sanctuary; deep down, i knew langdon would find her as obnoxious as the rest of us do.

"He said the interviews start tomorrow" Mallory says quietly. I exhale and ponder of life outside the outpost. I trust that Langdon would take us somewhere safe, and better than this hellhole, but how does the cooperate have all these supplies. My thoughts are interrupted by Mallory throwing a novel at me. "here, i just finished this one, tell me how you like it, i gotta get back to cleaning" the loneliness fills the library Mallory exits. even though shes a grey, and im a purple, shes truly my only friend here. i dive into a few chapters of the book, literature being my only escape. the doors separating the library from the common area slowly open. i expect gallant or coco, coming to complain; yet the tall man with blonde locks stands in their place. our eyes meet, a rush of anxiety hits me. his hands run across the door frame as he approaches me. looking down at me, examining my book. "so you like reading?" his cool tones echoing. i nod my head "yes mr.langdon" he smiles at my manners and crosses his arms. "are you ready for your interview miss y/l/n" an intimidating smile forms upon his lips. without answering, he presents his hand to my level. "come with me dear" i gently take his hand, and follow him through the candlelit halls.

The warmth of his office flireplace gave me a sense of comfort as we entered his study. It's decorated with the minimalistic black walls & decor, just as the rest of the outpost. A few of his personal items linger, such as novels and his notebook. I slowly sink into the chair infront of his desk. His fingers gracefully run across the desk as he takes a seat in his leather chair. His hands rest on the table as he looks up to me. a wave of anxiety hits me, and my I struggle to keep my eyes in his gaze. he scoffs "miss y/l/n" he exhales "what are you afraid of?" my face shifts to look at him. my lips pursed "I don't really know anymore" I feel a lump in my throat. tears well in my eyes; as I shift my head away from him, he gently turns it back with his hand. "it's okay y/n" my cheek rests in his palm. this is the first time I've felt comfort in the outpost. is it strange considering he is the anti-christ; yet he brings the most comfort. a tear slips out and rolls onto his hand. I look up to see his head tilted, a concerned yet caring face stared back at me. I grab his wrist and lower his hand from my face. I begin feeling embarrassed that I'm crying in front of him. "i-i'm sorry mr.langdon, I don't mean to get emotional" he gives a warm smile "It's okay dear, I understand" he rises from his chair and comes to my seat across the table. "come here" the evil in his eyes turned to kind. I obey and shakily get up from my chair. his arms wrap around me, by instinct I wrap my arms around his waist. his warmth calms my tears and his scent eases my anxiety. he holds me for a few minutes, gently playing with my hair. it feels as if a weight lifted off of me while being in his arms. he pulls out from the hug and places a kiss on top of my head. "I know how it feels to be alone, for some odd reason I sympathize your pain, I promise I will ease your thoughts one day" a smile forms on my lips, knowing that just maybe I have found a person who will truly help me.

[plush-rabbit]

Mental Toll - Brothers.

Request: My mom kicked me out, her 15 year old daughter out of her house. And I've been staying with my aunt but everything is taking a mental toll on me . Can I get a Beel, mammon, Leviathan, or asmo comfort?

A/N: Sweetheart, I’m sorry for this. It can be all so difficult for you, but please take care of yourself. Remember that nothing is your fault, you’re a child, you’re gonna be okay. Please don’t keep these emotions bottled up (im also assuming this is comfort on your situation, so yeah)

-

Mammon:

You’ll always have a place with him. He’s taken on a guardian role for you and while he might have hated it at first, he’s grown attached to you. Your guardians in the Human Realm don't matter. They decided to leave you, so now you’re here with him and he isn’t going to abandon you anytime soon. Mammon may not know what to do when he finds you crying and unable to speak, but he cares and he’ll try to show that to you, telling you that you can bunk with him for the night- you get to take his bed and he’ll sleep on the couch, you don’t have to be alone.

He isn’t exactly the best at comforting, using a bit too many words only to come up short, but once that initial nervousness wears off, he’s comforting. He’s taken care of a child before- granted they were much younger, and was then put into the care of witches- he knows what a scared kid looks like. He’ll offer what he can to you and let you rest your head on his bicep as he listens to you ramble about what happened. He won’t ever push for you to talk, but it might help sort out all those feelings that are bubbling up inside of you.

Of course it’s difficult for the both of you. He isn’t too knowledgeable about the mentality and fragility of a human mind and emotions but he can assume to be essentially kicked out of a parent’s home can be rough. He’s dealt with it before even if he knew the risks. He remembers the nights of pain and agony, the silent suffering that was thick in the air, and the lack of self-care. He comes in with a small meal every day, grabbing random vitamins that he thinks might be good for you, and just lets you rest. You see a more hidden side of Mammon, the one that cares too much, that acts almost like a parental figure and have a comforting smile and gives nice hugs.

You aren’t free to rest forever. He’s also seen what that kind of damage that can do to someone's mental health. He won’t ever pressure you to go out and do something you don’t want to, but you do have to move from the spot on his bed. You can hide yourself in his room for as long as you want, but you can’t live your life stuck in a bed. He knows that that isn’t good for anyone. You’ll have all the space that you could want and need, but you need to also talk to him and take care of yourself.

It’s his role as your guardian to take care of you and make sure that nothing bad would happen to you- you being in the Human Realm makes no difference to that. You’re still under his protection and he’ll take care of you as much as he can. Mammon can be brash, and have his sin take over, but it isn’t all that he is. He can be selfless and take care of you and let you just relax around him. There’s no pressure put on you and he’ll protect you. He promises that- he’s a demon, he’s lived for a long time and he’ll live for an even longer time and as long as he’s around, he’ll protect you.

Leviathan:

Coming to Leviathan is certainly a choice. He cares- of course he does! But, he doesn’t know what to do. Of course he knows how it feels, but it was different and so long ago and buried under memories and the fictional world, that he chose to forget that. It’s different with you. You’re a child who’s crying and at a loss for a parent that left them and it must hurt. He’s awkward, but he’ll sit by you and have a hand on your back telling you to take all the time that you need. He’s always here in his room after all, so you can always find him.

In the beginning, he doesn’t know what to do. Surely, there should be words or tips online that could help him translate his words and feelings better than “that sucks.” An apology feels so fake and unsure and he doesn't want that for you. You deserve something real, an actual meaningful interaction that might help you but he comes up blank. He doesn’t know what exactly he should say, so he just lets you rest beside him as he tells you his own encounter with abandonment and what helped him.

He tries to make you feel better in a way that helps him- via distractions. It helped him and maybe it could help you. You like to spend time with him so you both must share some type of interest in common. He feels so proud of himself when he offers you to read his manga or play some of his games. It’s a nice distraction and depending on what you choose, it can be a great way to just open up emotions and see what could effectively help trigger just that blockade of emotions for the both of you. You don’t have to do it, but it proves to be nice to just immerse yourself in some fictional tale.

Eventually, he starts to read what you read once you’ve fallen asleep. You gravitated towards it for a reason and it’s easier to talk to you like that. You get to be the hero, the protagonist or whoever you want, and he knows the struggles that they go through. He can help through an outside glance. It starts off simple, just him mentioning comments, prying for information about why you like a certain character and then in just a blink of an eye, you’re crying. You opened up and he’s by your side.

Comforting you is a bit awkward, but what could he expect. He sits by you and lets you talk through your emotions even if it makes no sense- your words are garbled and out of order- but he gets the main point of it. Leviathan understands that you’re hurting and who wouldn’t be. You’re a child, and the love of a parental figure means a lot. He might not be confident to have that type of relationship with you, but he can certainly be a big brother who lets you come into his room and sleep in a futon that he has when you’re feeling particularly lonely.

Asmodeus:

His eyes are sad, the usual glow and glimmer dimmed and his smile once beautiful and stretched, it pulled into a soft frown. Even in sadness, he still looks beautiful. With a gentle pull, he brings you into his room, and lets you set your stuff down on the floor. Asmodeus holds your face in his hands and gingerly wipes away your tears. You’ve had such a long day and it’s no secret that he has the best bath in the house, so he lets you go use it in order to destress, just enough to clean yourself and have time to gather your feelings and thoughts.

The room is suited to him and to only him, but he figures that you wouldn’t want to be alone. He has to rid some of the extra pillows on the bed, rid of the stronger scents in the room in order to not congest you more, and just declutter his room a bit more. It’s suited for him, a demon who can and lives for the finer things, but for you, he needs you to be able to breathe. The sheets are replaced, the towel that he has set for you soft and fluffy and the clothes clean and smelling like the house, a much better scent than the stitched to your clothes. He sends it to you via magic, wanting you to come to him when you’re ready.

When you approach him, he gives you a comforting smile and pats the bed beside him. He grabs your hand and massages it slowly, telling you that he’ll be here for you if you need anything. You can talk to him or choose not to, and he won’t pressure you in the slightest. You can take your time to talk to him. He feels a bit bad that he can’t tell you that everything will be okay, he knows it will, so sure of it that he’d bet himself on it, but it isn't what you want to hear. You just need to know that he’s right there by your side.

For now, you’re okay. You’re safe in his room and he likes being an older brother- at least to a few. He likes to spoil people rotten, and he gets to do that with you. You get to have everything good and shiny. You’re going to be okay when you stick with him, because he won’t let anything happen to you. He’s going to be your new home, your new big brother.

The process is tough, and he doesn’t rush anything. It’s subtle with Asmodeus and being ever so careful with his appearance, he makes sure to take care of yours. Mental health is so fragile and he just wants you to be okay. He’ll offer substitutions if certain activities can feel a bit too difficult for you, but he doesn’t push too much. You still have to take care of yourself and it might feel overbearing, but he needs to take care of you.

Beelzebub:

Family means everything to Beelzebub. At the very end of it, it’s part of the core of who he is. He feels your pain and is empathetic when you tell him what happened and he holds you close, letting you rest on his bed as he sits on the edge with a comforting hand rubbing circles on your back. He’s a demon, he knows just how cruel others can be, and yet, to see someone hurt someone as young as you, it makes him sick.

Your tears hit him hard and he can only hug you as you cry into him about your situation. There are too many emotions inside of you and it must be so difficult for you to handle all of them and he wishes he could help take that away, but he can only hold you and make sure that you sleep in a position that won’t hurt your neck once the tears have tired you out. It’s the little things that he does for you until you come to him and explain everything to him, and he’ll listen and won’t interrupt.

During this time, he tries to not be imposing. He doesn’t want you to run from him so he’ll give you time to come to him when you’re ready. He checks up on you often, knocking on your door and entering with a few snacks. He’ll stay if you ask him and talk to you about mundane stuff. A part of him wonders if that’s really what you want to hear, but he can’t say anything different. He doesn’t know what it is that you want to hear and he doesn’t want to pressure you any further. Anyways, it seems like you like to listen to him during these moments. Maybe, he provides a nice distraction.

He’ll always make sure that he has his phone on him in case you need him. He’s told you before that you can contact him whenever you want, and that he’ll come running to you. He’s sure it’s his big brother instincts taking over. He may be the sixth brother, but it doesn’t remove the fact that he has a twin. It’s only by his power that he ranks sixth. With you, he can be a big brother and be the cool and caring type that takes care of you. You can always come to him whenever you need something and he’ll make sure to give you whatever you want.

It comes to no surprise that you two develop a strong bond and you start to stick to him and he welcomes that. He won’t leave you alone unless you ask him to and he always makes sure to include you in whatever activity he has. During lunch, he’ll sit with you and listen to you and he’s glad that you're starting to feel better around him. You’ve both grown quite attached and he tries to do good by you. Beelzebub will give you whatever you need because beside his twin, you’re the youngest in the family. He’ll reassure you that nothing is your fault, that you’re only a child and that you’ll be okay. You’ve been there for him and he’ll be there for you.

[peach-pops]

hai! i love your hc so much and i just done reading the akaashi with karasuno's manager, it's so cute! can you please make it again but with kuroo or tsukishima? thanks a lot 😄🖤

I frickin love Kuroo so this was just so easy to write. Like as I was writing this, I was making myself giddy UGH I wish he was real. ANYWAY I still used the training camp storyline because those episodes just hit differently. Also keep sending requests!

Kuroo’s Crush on the Karasuno Manager 

I always make it a point to say that Kuroo is a huge dork but I firmly believe that when he is interested in someone, he will stop at nothing to make it known how he feels so keep that in mind

When the training camp starts, Kuroo is actually pretty excited because he has friends on the other teams and it just makes the experience more fun than playing against strangers

He knows that Karasuno is coming but he is totally caught off guard when he sees you walk in with the team because the last time Nekoma played against Karasuno, you weren’t a manager so Kuroo is like ???? pretty girl????

Kuroo does a double-take when he sees you and he is not ashamed to stare at you from across the gym. I know in his mind he’s thinking “ what the hell are they putting in Karasuno’s water?” because literally everyone from Karasuno is hot and that’s a fact

You can feel a pair of eyes on you but in a room full of people it’s kinda hard to pinpoint who but when you see Kuroo staring back at you, you almost choke on your water because you think he’s too attractive to even be real

“ Y/N-are you okay?” You feel Daichi pat your back as you nod back quickly and you literally face the opposite direction because you’re so embarrassed

It doesn’t last long because now, you have to get into manager mode since Nekoma and Karasuno are on the court next 

During the game, Kuroo is absolutely killing it I mean this dude is always on his toes but he’s moving faster than ever today because he wants to get your attention 

You’re more focused on your team since you have to take notes but whenever Kuroo makes a point, you both look up at each other and he smiles as if he’s confirming that you saw his shot 

Of course, Nekoma ends up winning and while the Karasuno boys are outside running for losing, Kuroo uses this chance to try and talk to you 

“ I couldn’t help but notice that I caught your attention, like what you see?” 

“ Oh please, don’t let it get to your head. I’m just doing my job Captain.” 

Kuroo feels his confidence boost up when he hears you call him that because you know that dude lets it go straight to his head

“ So now we have nicknames for each other? This is perfect I was already creating a list of what I could call you, how does future wife sound?” 

“ Wow. That was.... terrible. You really need to work on your flirting skills cause this won’t work on other girls.” 

“ Does that mean it’s working on you?” 

You shake your head and laugh as you look off to the side like you’re on the office because bruh, of course, it’s working on you but you’re not going to give him the satisfaction 

He uses the pause in the conversation to introduce himself but right after you introduce yourself, you get called to help the boys with their water

Daichi is totally staring Kuroo down btw 

You say your quick goodbyes but even as your walking away, Kuroo is still standing there with his hands on his hips and a huge smirk on his face because while you’re not giving into him completely, he loves a challenge 

Most of the day, Nekoma and Karasuno are both on their own courts playing matches at different times of the day and it seems like every time you both have a free minute, something always comes up 

Kuroo actually feels super down because he actually wants to have a conversation with you but you’re super busy during dinner 

plus he can’t get a word in around you when the Karasuno boys are guarding you like hawks 

You were feeling so drained from the day so after dinner, you go straight to bed but in the middle of the night you have to use the restroom so you get up and walk over in the dark to the nearest one which is down the hall 

You’re pretty freaked out because it is pretty dark and before bed, the boys were telling scary stories so you were definitely paranoid that someone was going to come up from behind a corner and murder you 

After you finished up in the bathroom, you walked back to the room but you bump into someone and you could feel your soul leave your body and you let out the wimpiest shriek ever 

“ Wha- It’s me!” Kuroo whispers loudly before he lets out a louder laugh,” you are so easy to scare I didn’t even do anything!”

“ I was not scared! I was just startled...there’s a difference. What are you even doing up?” 

Kuroo holds up some money and nods towards the end of the hallway,” Vending machine, you should come with me. I can walk you back to your room after so you don’t get scared again and wake up the whole school.” 

You let out an annoyed huff but you walk side by side with Kuroo as the two of you silently chat about how the training camp is going

Even though there’s hardly enough light, Kuroo still can’t help but stare at you when you’re not looking up at him. 

He knows everything between the two of you is just playful for now but he knows he is already catching feelings and he hasn’t even known you for a full day

Kuroo gets two drinks in the vending machine and hands you one before he sits down against the wall. He uses it to see if you’ll join him or not and luckily you accept his offer and sit down right beside him 

“ You know, we’re gonna beat Karasuno again tomorrow, I just wanted to give you a heads up.”

“ That’s pretty bold of you to say. You’ve seen how the guys play, they’re starting to get a real rhythm going and I wouldn’t be surprised if we turn things around tomorrow” You smirked as you leaned your head against the wall. 

The thing about Kuroo was that gears were always turning in his head and working overtime. He wasn’t a crazy overthinker by any means but he was always thinking of ideas so he started developing a plan in his head

“ Tell you what, let’s make a bet right here. If Nekoma wins tomorrow, you have to go on a date with me.” 

LOOK AND LISTEN  Kuroo is hardly ever this bold with a girl he likes no matter what anybody says but he knows that there’s a small possibility that could say yes and that’s all he needs to boost his ego 

“ And what if you guys lose?” 

“ Trust me, we won’t lose, shake on it?” 

You look down at Kuroo’s hand and without a second thought, you shake it softly,” Good luck Captain. You’ll need it.” 

TRUST ME Kuroo did not get a wink of sleep because all he could think about that night was where he would take you two on a date because obviously, he knew Nekoma would win, especially now since he had even more motivation than the day before 

You weren’t sure why you were so nervous to watch Karasuno and Nekoma’s game because after all, it wasn’t like it was a real tournament but you could feel that the overall vibe on the court gym was different

If you thought Kuroo was playing aggressively yesterday, than oh boy you were in for it when this game rolled through 

Not a single ball went through Kuroo when he was at the front. This boy was DETERMINED to land a date with you 

With every point Nekoma lost, that only fueled Kuroo to do even better than before and it was no surprise that Nekoma took both sets

After the teams shook hands and thanked each other for the game, Kuroo headed straight towards you with the biggest smile on his face

“ So, what do you think?”

“ Mm, I think you’re pretty sweaty to be honest,” you laughed as Kuroo used the back of his hand to wipe his forehead,” but congratulations, you actually weren’t half bad. I’m guessing I owe you a date then?” 

“ Yep, seems like it. Although if you want to go ahead and congratulate me in some other way, I wouldn’t stop you,” Kuroo tapped his cheek with his finger as he leaned his head down for you to kiss his cheek.

OMG IM SO IN LOVE WITH HIM JUST IMAGINE GAHHHH

You rolled your eyes as you felt the eyes of some of the Nekoma and Karasuno players looking towards the two of you. You stood up on your tippy-toes as you pressed a light kiss onto his cheek which earned some oooooos from Nekoma  and curses from Karasuno 

“ KUROO STEP AWAY FROM HER IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE!”

“ Aw that’s cute, look at Daichi being protective.” 

“ Um, no,he’s serious. You should really go now.”

[moostaronce]

Almost Anything

Request: Hey, I loved both your dreamcatcher and loona scenario. Is it okay to request a loona scenario where the members find out yeojin's getting bullied at school and then the next day the 13th member who goes to the same school but had no idea yeojinie was being bullied, returns home early with a busted lip and a cut on her forehead. Apparently, she had fought yeojin's bullies and got in trouble. And can we see a little preview of the fight. If not it's okay. ☺️

Platonic Pairing: Yeojin x 13th member!Reader

A/N: Sure I hope you like it.

When Hyejoo dropped out of school you and Yerim decided to stay, but Yerim goes to a different school than you and Yeojin. Originally you went to Yerim's school but decided to switch to Yeojin's so that you could spend more time with your maknae. You hardly see each other during school hours but you come and go together every day. Over time, Yeojin seems to withdraw from you a little. Urging you to leave earlier than her and avoiding your eyes when you or the members ask what's wrong.

The members have been looking to you for answers, but you don't have any to give, which frustrates you to no end. She used to tell you all about her day on the way home, but now when you do go home together she's much quieter than you've ever seen her.

Today as usual you feel Haseul burning a hole in the side of your head. Neither of you speaks up or says anything so the tension only rises until you look at her dead in the eye. Haseul can tell from the look in your eyes that it's killing you too, maybe even more than anyone else. So she says nothing. She sighs and pats your shoulder before getting up to finish packing Yerim, Yeojin, and your lunches. She has always insisted on making your lunch so that she knows your eating. Though Yeojin always seems starved when she comes home.

"Yeojin-ah! Yerim-ah! Come on you two, you only have 10 minutes to eat your breakfast." Haseul calls out to her other younger members.

The two come running down the stairs giggling together when they both beam at you, already sitting and eating your cereal. You give them both your best smile even though it's a bit forced at this point. It's always like this. Yeojin smiles in the morning when she wakes up, but the moment you get in the van together her frown comes out and she doesn't talk at all. Not today though, today you were getting to the bottom of this no matter what.

Fifteen minutes later you and Yeojin are hugging Yerim goodbye before heading to your usual van for school while she heads to hers. Yeojin is abnormally quiet again but you don't try to push her. You do your best to keep an eye on her throughout the day when you realize you never gave her the lunch Haseul handed to you for her. With your teacher's permission, you make your way to the class you know Yeojin should be in but when you look in she isn't there. You check the bathroom near her class and hear voices so you go in as quietly as possible and stand against the wall by the door and out of sight.

"Come on seriously? I thought that dumb unnie of yours makes you lunch every day, now we're gonna be hungry you idiot." A girl you recognize as Park Hyemi, a girl in Yeojin's class, standing over your maknae with two others you don't recognize. What's clear is that they're much bigger than Yeojin and she looks uncomfortable, scared even.

Yeojin doesn't respond she just keeps her head down and does her best not to cry.

"What's the matter Yeojin? Why don't you call for your precious Y/n unnie to come to save you? We'd love to beat on her too." This seems to spark something in Yeojin when she looks up and scoffs. An instant reaction to the mention of you and a newfound confidence that proves she believes the next thing that comes out of her mouth.

"I haven't told Y/n unnie about you for your own sakes."

"Oh? And why is that shrimp for brains." Yeojin shrugs her shoulders and doesn't hesitate.

"Because I'm afraid she'd kill you."

They laugh at her and shove her in the stall behind her, intending to start beating on her again. You open the door and call Yeojin's name to create the illusion that you're just arriving and walk in with her lunchbox and a phony smile plastered on your face.

"Yeojin-ah?" You walk deeper into the bathroom to find the three girls lined up next to each other and smiling nervously at you. With Yeojin stepping out of the stall looking a little disheveled but relieved to see you.

"Unnie? What are you doing here?" Yeojin breathes out with worry. Her eyes keep shifting to the three girls doing their best to look as innocent as possible.

"I accidentally stole your lunch, kiddo. You wanna eat together since I came all this way to find you?" Her tiny face lights up immediately.

"Yes unnie, let's go!" Yeojin turns to you and tries to push you out of the bathroom and you can't help but chuckle.

"Wait Yeojinnie, aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" The girls perk up and extend their hands to you with excitement that makes you want to vomit on all three of them. They introduce themselves as Hyemi, Doyoung, and Minha. You just smile an ominously sweet smile at them while looking each in the eye. Their hands are left hanging in the space between you.

"Well. I hope to meet you all again soon. Please take care of my Yeojinnie," You pause, tilting your head to the side with what they would only describe as a terrifying smile on your face. "Or. Else."

They all pale remembering Yeojin's words from earlier. You turn and give Yeojin a genuine smile and put your hands on her cheeks, smoothing them a little.

"Let's go eat, okay?"

Yeojin nods at you and takes your hand in hers as you leave the bathroom together but the moment you two are out of the bathroom your face changes and your body stiffens but you don't let go of Yeojin's hand. You actually pull her closer into your side like you don't want anyone else touching her and she knows that you saw more than you originally let on.

"Unnie-" She begins but you cut her off immediately.

"Not another word until we get outside Yeojin. But believe we will be discussing this."

The smaller girl quiets but walks closer to your side than usual. The truth of the matter was she had been dealing with these girls for months now, always wishing she could reach out to you for help but she knows you too well. She's seen how heated you get just at antis posting bad things about your members online. She knows that you value her like a real little sister and she was more afraid of what you'd do if you found out. You get outside and under the tree, you two used to eat under all the time before she started withdrawing from you.

At first, you don't speak you just open both of your lunches and add about half of yours to hers so that she had more to eat than you. You crack open the special chopsticks that you bought her for her last birthday with her name engraved on them and hand them to her with her extra full lunch. Yeojin tries to protest you giving up so much of your food but the look on your face leaves no room for any argument.

The two of you eat in silence but it's comfortable for her. This is the first time in months that she feels safe. The first time in months that she's actually gotten to eat one of Haseul's specially made lunches and in peace. The emotion builds up for her so much that she doesn't even notice the tears streaming down her face until she feels you wiping them, away. She looks up at you and sees the neutrality of your features but the rage burning behind your eyes.

"How long has this been going on and why haven't you told anyone?"

"About 3 months. I didn't want anyone to worry about me. I feel like a burden already as it is. I feel like I annoy you guys all the time."

"First of all, that's too long for us to go to the same school and you not tell me. I thought we were closer than that Yeojin. Second, you could never really be annoying. We love you Yeojin. And you should know that I would do almost anything for you."

"And that's what I'm scared of! I don't want you getting in trouble because of me."

"I won't. I'm going to get in trouble because of me." Yeojin furrows her brows and pauses eating, chopsticks mid-air. When she goes to speak you hold your hand up to quiet her.

"So here's what's going to happen. Tomorrow you don't feel good. I'll back you up, whatever it takes but you aren't coming to school tomorrow and I'll handle this my way. Understood?"

"But unnie you can't-" Her protests fall on deaf ears.

"Do you understand me Im Yeojin?" Your voice never raises but the look on your face tells her that there is no changing your mind anymore.

The rest of the day Yeojin manages to dodge her bullies until it's time to go home and they corner her in the classroom after everyone else leaves. But they don't know that your already a step ahead and before they can even speak you're in the doorway sweetly calling Yeojin's name.

"Kiddo, let's go. The unnies and I have a surprise for you waiting at the dorm." You reach out your hand for her and she smiles genuinely at you for the 3rd time today. It's nice to see.

Yeojin takes you and allows you to put your arm around her shoulder when she approaches you. You smile that same scary smile at the three girls looking dumbfounded as you two walk away. This time you don't change your demeanor or try to scold her. You just happily talk with your maknae all the way home.

When you arrive home together talking and laughing arm in arm the members are pleasantly surprised. Almost immediately you have to go to a schedule and all throughout nobody misses the way Yeojin clings to you. More than she used to before her attitude changed a few months back. When she finally lets you go to use the bathroom everyone turns to you with raised eyebrows and you just give them a knowing smile.

If you tell them now, they may try to stop you from doing what you're planning. You know full well what you intend is wrong and you know that the consequences will be heavy, but you can't bring yourself to care. The thought of those girls pushing Yeojin around and hurting her in any capacity has your better judgment going into hibernation.----------------------

The next morning, you lie to Haseul through your teeth about how Yeojin seems sick and she plays along. Haseul doesn't question it because you've never lied to her before. So you go on your way to school alone. You wait until the period before lunch to skip your class and wait outside of Yeojin's class for the three troublemakers to come out.

Back home Yeojin gets antsy waiting around. You haven't responded to her texts and she can only put on the sick charade for so long. Haseul is the first to notice and then Hyejoo.

"Why do you look so worried?" Hyejoo asks her younger friend.

That's all it takes she gathers everyone in the living room before she starts telling the yesterday's events at school. Meanwhile, her class lets out and the three girls you were waiting for stop right in their tracks when they see you leaning against the wall with your arms crossed. The thing is they may be bigger than Yeojin but they aren't bigger than you. Not to say your maknae is defenseless but you and Hyejoo are known for your strength for a reason.

"So what was it you said yesterday? You'd love to beat on me too?"

They all grow a little paler when you push off the wall and stand in front of them.

"Hit me, if you've got the guts."

So Hyemi does. she punches you square in the mouth, instantly busting your lip. You stumble back a little but you're quick to stand solid again. You don't bother wiping away the blood on your lip, opting to smile at them instead.

"Again."

This time all three girls come after you but you're quick. One thing nobody but your members knew was that you, like Jiwoo, are a third-degree black belt in taekwondo and working on your fourth. You catch Doyoung right behind the ear with a roundhouse kick that has her down and disoriented while you dodge Hyemi and Minha's efforts to hit you. They aren't prepared for the power in your legs or the speed that you have in general when you sweep both of theirs legs from under them and stomp your foot down next to their heads.

"If you ever bother my Yeojinnie again. We're going to have serious problems, you get me?"

They nod and stay down as you walk yourself to the principal's office. He takes one look at you and gets concerned but he doesn't have to wait for an explanation. You tell him how they bullied Yeojin and so you returned the favor. He ended up giving you 3 days of out-of-school suspension. You're smart so you saved yourself a lot of trouble when you let them hit you first. Even smarter for provoking the, right in front of a camera for proof purposes. So you were sent home.

When you got back to the dorm Yeojin was wrapping up her story to the members and they all looked at you with jaws on the floor at the blood from your lip dripping onto your uniform. Yeojin runs up to you with a tissue and wipes some blood from your forehead too, brushing a wound that you didn't even know was there. You reach for your forehead and chuckle at the fact that one of them, managed to scratch you.

"Um..what's so funny Y/n? Look at you! You're a mess." Haseul is the first to address you with words.

"Don't worry about it unnie, I'm fine. I am suspended for 3 days but it was worth it."

"What was worth it?" Jinsol asks from her position on the couch.

You don't look at the unnies because you know they are staring daggers at you. Instead, you look to Yeojin and wrap her in a tight hug.

"I took care of it." You're loud enough for everyone to hear you and they put two and two together. Yeojin told the members that you seemed to have a plan but they weren't expecting this. There is just silence in the room as you hug Yeojin with all your might.

"Did you win?" Finally, someone speaks relieving the tension a little as everyone is surprised to see Jiwoo speak up.

"Of course I won unnie. This was just necessary damage, that's all." You chuckle when Yeojin hits your arm lightly. Jiwoo smiles and high-fives you. "That's my girl."

"So who's going to explain this to Yerim when she gets home?" Haseul asks. You and Yeojin look at each other and shout simultaneously.

"Not it!"

[the-tiniest-one]

Late Night Office Visit: Confessions of the Copy Ninja

Kakashi X Reader

This is my first post so go easy on me. Its just a little fluffy/smut I wrote while thinking about it. Tell me what you think and thank you so much for reading!

***

Your office is tinted in soft warm light from the small lamp by your desk. A candle burning near your desk is scented for the fall season, October is here in the village and it’s starting to get chilly. You had dressed comfortably for work, an over-sized lavender hoody and long black leggings that covered your socked feet with knitted dark grey boots. Your (h/l,h/c) in a messy bun.

It’s no secret that Kakashi is a man of routine.

 His routine had recently begun to include trips to your office. Usually to tease you. You being a night owl, around 1am like clockwork when he was home from missions, he will indulge in a “random and unplanned”, unannounced visit, usually involving some kind of failed attempt at sneaking in and trying his best at scaring you. You expect his shit by now though. 

During his visit both you and he compete to best the other in a battle of “who can make the other blush” during the private office conversations.

“So why are you always working so late” kakashi asked, wandering around the office, picking up a book from the shelf and thumbing it lazily. “Dont you have a boyfriend to go home to?”

The question was bold.

“No”. A short yet devilishly innocent sounding reply from you, while looking at your mound of papers littering your desk, followed by deafening silence.

“What a shame” Kakashi says almost no variation in tone.

The tension is strangling you. 

Feeling a little bit bold as well, you decide to lay the innocent act on as thick as possible 

“I guess it is a shame. It gets so lonely in my little apartment...If only I had someone to come home to... It’s too bad. I bet you probably have lots of company waiting for you to get home and keep them warm.” you reply with a grin.  

Standing and walking over to the large window Kakashi came into the office through, leaning forward to close it, the cool October air giving you a chill.

Turning around, almost in an instant, Kakashi was behind you. Wrapping both hands in your hair with breath taking tenderness. His lips pressing against yours….expressing desperation and need. You had been dreaming of this moment for months, your tongue pushing through his lips first. Both of you searching for security in each others kiss. 

When he pulled back to look at you, you kept your eyes closed for a moment. savoring the first time. 

The first time that you knew, as silly as it sounded....As much as you hated the idea that you could be so deeply invested before his lips ever touched yours....the first time that the man you could feel in your blood was your perfect match...Your soulmate kissed your lips.

When you did finally open your eyes, the worried look carved across his perfect masked features was too clear. “Was that okay?” he asked, clearly worried to hear the answer.

Without verbally responding, you crashed into his lips again. This time wrapping your legs around his waist and pushing your hands through his unruly hair.

Within seconds your back hit the desk gently, his hands wandering under your hoody. His calloused thumbs running over your nipples, causing you to moan quietly into his open mouth.

His lips left yours quickly finding your jawline, just behind your ear, “I have wanted to kiss you from the instant that I first saw you”. he whispered.

You blushed... “six months does feel like a long time” you respond quietly.

He stops kissing for a moment to look at you inquisitively, (your tits still fully engulfed in his large hands). “6 months?” he asks confused.

“Yeah, when we first met?” You reply slightly embarrassed by his exasperated expression. 

He looks at you with even more embarrassment and his soul bared just under the surface of his clear pretty eyes,

 “Oh, well uh...you see, I was talking about the very first time that I first saw you...like ever ...back at the Academy.” Said Kakashi

“What” you said, thinking back....Kakashi, and the other mutual friends you two shared from his graduating class like Guy and Asuma.... were two years above you. You cant remember ever having seen him at the Academy or even when you and your team had grown and gone on countless missions together. You would remember him, you know it. It wasn't as though he wasn't around...He was just such a private guy (and you were a private girl), and he had spent so many years in the special ANBU division or...away from other people in general. 

Even though you’d never met in person until about 6 months ago, you’d heard of the famous copy ninja almost your whole life. His sinister reputation was known throughout the hidden nations.

“How long?” you ask breathless...nervous to hear the answer.

“Hmmm lets see...I guess it would be the day you graduated from the Academy... I was passing by, headed to turn in a mission report when they posted the list.” he replied in a more confident tone.

“I watched you never stop to check it. You already knew you made it. Everyone else clamoring for a look at the list, and I heard you tell another student...”Im going to become a chunin, then a jonin, then Hokage. To protect the person I love someday”. 

Your stomach did somersaults. You remembered the moment he was quoting..... but as hard as you tried to place him, he wasn’t there in your memory of that day.

 Head spinning... you were an early academy graduate, 8 years old when you made genin. You were 27 now….That means Kakashi Hatake has loved you almost your entire life...without you ever having met you. 

You forced him back down onto your lips while simultaneously unzipping his flack jacket. Then pulling his shirt over his head to reveal his perfect torso.

He undressed you however, much more slow and methodically, only a bra under your hoody, quickly unclasping it and throwing it to the side. Then your leggings, finally while kissing down your neck to your breasts, he pulled your panties off and put them in his pocket.

His mouth making slow circles around your nipples. You noticed how wet you were when his right hand slid from your tits to your hip, then to your slit...he giggled as he quickly fingered and teased the outside of your soaked pussy.

“Please kashi” you gasped, maybe louder than you wanted for the office building you were currently being ravaged in.

His slow kisses moved down to your panty line. Lips dancing along your skin in perfect rhythm with his hands teasing you. 

“Please what?” he asked with an almost stern inflection

At first you didnt reply, only writhing under him.

But the shock of a slap on your inner thigh made you almost scream with desire.

“Please what” he asked again while resuming the kisses to your belly.

Please let me cum you said, almost at a whisper.

Just like that his mouth was on you. Licking your clit at first, an eternity of teasing you nearly to tears. Then he started sucking you with a ferocity that bordered on desperation.

You were a mess. You couldn’t even begin to form coherent thoughts when you felt his tip graze your pussy lips.

“You looked into his eyes, and he waited for confirmation.”

The second you nodded he began. Slowly dipping in and out, first the tip, then slowly incorporating more of himself. Making sure you were comfortably adjusted before adding another half inch or so. The care in which he conducted himself was nothing short of impressive...however it was driving you insane. You needed to be fucked. You wrapped your legs around him, forcing him as deep as he would go, catching him off guard...if only due to his extreme focus on your perfect pussy.

He gasped at the sudden tight warmth around his cock, looking up at you as you rocked your hips to help him along.

It didnt take more than a minute at most before you laced your hand into his…

“Im so close, kashi...can I please cum?”

Surprised and fully turned on by the request, his thumb hit your clit, fast circles helping you along.

“Cum on my cock (y/n). I want your pretty pussy to cum for me”

And like that you snapped, quivering and writhing on your desk while he followed almost immediately, soaking your insides with his hot seed.

You laid motionless, gasping for air and seeing stars….

He kissed your nipples again, still inside you,  making you jump from the overstimulation.

Finally resting on your chest while your hands wandered through his hair.

“I wanted to do that for an eternity” he said still catching his breath.

“Well I let me grant that wish” you say with a giggle. “An eternity it is”.

[stargaze-issei]

Hi I was wondering if you could do some headcanons for Todoroki, Bakugo, Shoji and Tokoyami where maybe their s/o is injured after protecting some classmates for example how would they react after hearing about it and act towards the ones they were protecting and how they are really soft to their s/o. Does that make sense? Ooh and maybe how their class is shocked at them being soft towards their s/o. Sorry the request is so long

hi! this made me so soft, and i love every character so 🥺 thanks for requesting, bb! this is gonna be long lmao, so it's under the cut.

(also, im sorry for todoroki's one being so angsty and this taking so long, i had a couple of... rough days)

— 𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐬/𝐨 + 𝐛𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐠𝐨𝐮, 𝐭𝐨𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐢, 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐣𝐢 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨𝐤𝐨𝐲𝐚𝐦𝐢.

bakugou katsuki.

-> bakugou loves to see you work hard and push your own limits.

-> often, he just let's you train however you think it's best.

-> so when you say you're going to have some extra training with kirishima, he wishes you luck.

-> "don't be late for dinner, dumbass, or i'll kick shitty hair's ass" ofc he won't kick you, you're his precious s/o.

-> when you arrived to the gym kirishima had requested, there he was, accompanied by deku.

-> "i hope you don't mind midoriya tagging along", you didn't, actually.

-> everything went as usual, a few punches here and there, some laughs.

-> but, somehow, while both you and deku were testing red riot's resistance, izuku got way too into it and didn't realize only kirishima's arms were hardened.

-> you saw a kick flying to the red hair's torso, and your body moved by itself.

-> the impact had you thrown to the other side of the gym, barely staying conscious.

-> to you, everything was so fast.

-> to bakugou it was the other way around.

-> a sweaty kirishima appeared, looking desperately for him, without making one coherent sentence.

-> "y/n... infirmary... bad"

-> katsuki had NEVER blast out so fast. like, NEVER.

-> when he got to recover girl's office, you were sleeping. she explained to him that there wasn't anything major, but you were extremely tired, therefore, sleeping. recommended a few days of rest, and then you'd be good as new.

-> of course he heard you were never recovering almost dying.

-> deku was a crying mess, poor him was so scared, kirishima was trying to calm him down but it was impossible.

-> when bakugou knew HE had hurt YOU?

-> "what the fuck were you even doing there, huh? a damn quirk stealer like you shouldn't be fucking allowed near people who earned they own place here. what? were you jealous of them? stop fucking crying and ow–"

-> "katsuki. stop." nobody saw you woke up, you'd had to thank your boyfriend for that.

-> you asked everyone to leave and explained bakugou it wasn't midoriya's fault, so he shouldn't bully him.

-> he said yes to you but had now intention of stopping lmao.

-> they took you to your dorm room, where bakugou had already set a bed under yours so he could watch over you at nights.

-> nobody dared to stop him.

-> until you were allowed to go back to classes, he was to your demand. everyone was so surprised to see bakugou katsuki doing what he was asked willingly.

-> AND THE LOOKS HE GAVE TO DEKU.

-> poor broccoli boy wasn't allowed to even look at you without gaining a whole menu of insults.

-> he apologized writing a note he gave to todoroki who gave it to you.

-> katsuki is really worried, like, reaaaally worried, so he makes you healthy meals, takes it to your room so you don't move too much and then washes the dishes.

-> "geez maybe i have to ask midoriya to kick me more often" HE WOULD LOOK YOU DEAD IN THE EYE AND CALL YOU THE BIGGEST IDIOT WITH NO HINT OF LOVE 😭

-> at school, he doesn't leave your side. if you complain on anything, even if it has NOTHING to do with your injury, won't stop until he fixes it.

-> kaminari, mina and sero tease him so. fucking. bad.

-> kirishima is kinda scared bc he thought you were dead for a second so prefers to let bakugou take good care of you.

-> whenever you feel a little pain at the place of the hit, he will warm his hands and put them on your torso.

-> the warm feeling helps to ease the pain, and he has an excuse to touch you. win win.

-> he's not angry at kirishima at all, even, if he has to leave you, kirishima is in charge of taking care of you.

-> but your favorite time is when you're alone with him, after school.

-> he'll get so soft towards you, stroking your hair, kissing your head.

-> the day after the accident, it was mainly because he was genuinely scared of something happening to you.

-> "you're so fucking dumb, shitty hair can take hits better than you do, what on earth was i supposed to do if you were actually hurt? don't do that, ever again, got it?"

-> you got a huge bruise from the impact though, and he kisses it before going to sleep to make sure it doesn't hurt 🥺

that was completely out of character but idcccc

todoroki shoto.

-> he's... intense, to say the least.

-> but it's just with you, like, he doesn't show it to everybody.

-> both of you are doing your internship, so you haven't spoke as much as usual.

-> he misses you, but knows you're fulfilling your dreams, so he'll wait.

-> you went to uwabami agency, along with yaoyorozu and kendou.

-> even though mostly it was just being her assistant, this one time you were called to a collapsed zone just outside of tokyo.

-> supposedly, the area was already secure when you arrived, you, momo and kendo used your quirks to help rescue trapped people wherever uwabami told you.

-> momo was trying to help a civilian, and didn't notice the big rock falling from above.

-> you launched yourself towards them, trying to push them out of the way.

-> the rock hit you instead.

-> you didn't remember a thing after that.

-> todoroki was at his father's agency when he got the call.

-> "please, get to the hospital quickly, i– y/n's in really bad shape, please, i'm so sorry"

-> to hear yaoyorozu crying, saying you were in the hospital?? he couldn't move at first. like, frozen.

-> but after understanding what was going on, he got to the hospital even before the ambulance.

-> he heard a commotion in the e.r., and run there.

-> you were on a gurney, covered in dirt and blood, carried by a bunch of paramedics screaming things to each others.

-> todoroki couldn't hear a thing, all he could focus on, was on your unconscious body.

-> he felt a hand placing on his shoulder, yaoyorozu was still crying and trying to explain him what had happened.

-> but he wanted to touch you, seeing you like that, like you were dead right in front of his eyes, he needed to feel your warm.

-> three nurses were needed to hold him from getting near you.

-> he was losing his little composure, and his left arm began to feel hotter and hotter.

-> you were taken to the operation room, leaving him on the edge of combusting in tears of impotence.

-> even though momo tried again and again to explain him, he shut down everything except you.

-> all he could think about was you, lying in a operation table, fighting for your life.

-> the rest of the u.a. arrived with time, the procedure didn't end.

-> everyone was more than shocked to see todoroki so feral, a single word or touch from someone could develop in a big fire, from the guy.

-> when the doctor finally came, shoto almost tackled him.

-> "they're going to be fine, there were a couple complications during the procedure, but everything turned out okay. we'll keep them in here for two weeks, in observation, but we're confident that they'll be leaving in less than a month".

-> for the first time in hours, todoroki actually breath.

-> the doctors allowed him into your room, and he decided to stay there until you could leave.

-> NOBODY was allowed there, besides your family and doctors.

-> he really felt like anyone else would hurt you.

-> when you woke up, he was sleeping besides you.

-> "oh, you're awake, baby, you're awake" as soon as he saw you, he took you into his arms.

-> after the doctors gave you permission to leave, he was right by to your side the whole time.

-> at the dorms, todoroki woke up before you to help you get ready, and went to sleep after so he made sure you were okay.

-> izuku understood your boyfriend worried, but highkey worried about his health.

-> for a while, todoroki ignored yaoyorozu existence, even if he knew it wasn't actually her fault, he hated that you put yourself in danger for someone else.

-> with time, you recovered and todoroki started to go back to his usual self.

-> but everyone remembered how hard can be to todoroki when his loved ones are in danger.

-> im sorry this doesn't have so much fluff

shoji mezou.

-> with shoji, we're going to skip right after you get injured.

-> because i'm sure he wouldn't be upset at whoever you were protecting.

-> he's a very logical dude, and understand you were doing your job as a hero.

-> and he loves you for it.

-> when they told him you got wounded, he tried real hard to hide how worried he was.

-> you are pretty strong, and lowkey stubborn so you accept getting treated instead of saying "it was nothing"?

-> it has to be at least a little serious.

-> but he's shoji, he's cool headed, he doesn't let his feelings cloud his judgement.

-> turns out, that rule didn't apply to you.

-> don't get me wrong, he didn't get violent like bakugou or todoroki.

-> he did freaked, asked recovery girl about your condition every five minutes.

-> "can i see them now? oh, right, sorry... are they alright? when will they be able to leave? can i go in now?"

-> no one had ever seen him so openly worried.

-> it's really observant, if you go back to school right after the incident, will notice immediately if something is wrong.

-> like you're in pain, or even uncomfortable because of your injury.

-> ask for permission to take you back to the dorms, you need to get rest and won't even argue about it.

-> if you have to stay in bed for a couple of days, be sure he will spend his day there.

-> tries everything to take your mind off your boring room.

-> tells you stories, lame jokes, keeps you updated on the class gossip, even if he usually doesn't like that kind of stuff.

-> "huh, yeah, midoriya and uraraka? right, they like each other, hm, i saw them having lunch together"

-> he might be a human radar but it's pretty much clueless when it comes to this things.

-> "they always have lunch together, mezou!" be nice to him, he's trying his best ):

-> i think everyone expects shoji to be soft when it comes to you, but not that soft.

-> once they saw him carrying you in his arms down the stairs, because "your wound hurt".

-> tokoyami was certainly shocked to see his friend like that.

-> is always hugging you with one or two of his arms.

-> will try to cook healthy meals, but fails.

-> he wants you to have enough nutrients and heal properly, okay?

-> buys you your favorite snacks and candies before going to the dorms.

-> shoji doesn't want his beloved s/o to get depressed for being locked up too long, and gives his best to make you feel happy.

-> is insanely shy about it though, and will try to hide his excellent-boyfriend side.

-> lots!! of!! cuddles!!

-> if you're okay with it, will take advantage of the situation and cuddle you like crazy.

-> i mean, you can't get out of bed and he just happens to have six arms willing to keep you warm and cozy.

-> is your number one caretaker and will continue being it until you feel better bc he's best boi 🥰

tokoyami fumikage.

-> just as todoroki, he's intense af.

-> if you're apart, he would text you everyday, you know, just checking.

-> even when he went away to work with hawks, still managed to find the time to talk to you.

-> benefits of being his s/o.

-> and it was at that time you got into an accident.

-> he instantly got worried when you didn't reply to his text after an hour, two hours, three hours.

-> you usually let him know if you're busy, but you just said you were going on a walk with kaminari.

-> hawks saw him getting upset, and gave him permission to go see you.

-> just when he was going out, midoriya called him.

-> "hi, tokoyami, i'm sorry i didn't call you before, um, please don't freak out, y/n got... y/n got hit by a car, but she's okay! it was not as bad as it sounds! we're at recovery–"

-> it wasn't tokoyami who got out of control, it was dark shadow.

-> poor thing got so scared something happening to you, he took tokoyami and flew towards you.

-> when he arrived, kaminari, midoriya, and a couple of your friends were outside u.a.'s infirmary.

-> turns out, while walking with kaminari, messing around, he got distracted and cross the street without looking.

-> the car managed to stop a little but you pushed him out the way and got hit anyways.

-> since there wasn't anything too damaged, recovery girl had already cured you when tokoyami arrived.

-> "are you alright, my love?" he wasn't that good with words, but you felt his worry through his eyes.

-> he couldn't avoid touching your face and arms while you were in the gurney.

-> i think he's those kind of guy who moves frenetically his hands when he's nervous.

-> you had to grab both his hands bc he was getting you nervous lol.

-> "they're fine, but i recommend having a few days off, in case your leg hurts more than normal, let me know, okay?" and with that, dark shadow took you to your room.

-> as worried as he was, he tried to keep his temper.

-> "are you sure you don't need anything? dark shadow can help you down stairs, i can do it too, something to eat, maybe? or s–"

-> you'd have to tell him ten times you're alright, and repeat it another twenty times.

-> and he would still ask you spontaneously.

-> while you're at the dorms and he's at class, people keep asking him how are you.

-> he says you're okay and he isn't worried, but dark shadow practically cries saying how much he misses you.

-> "fumikage misses them too, all he does is thinking about them"

-> tokoyami blushes hard if he can.

-> takes notes in class and gives you your late homework.

-> also helps you do it but do NOT give you the answers, you're smart enough to do it by yourself.

-> "see? i knew you could do it, my love"

-> leave me alone he only calls you my love.

-> he isn't a fan of cuddles, but seeing you in that condition?

-> is one of the few times he ASKS YOU to cuddle.

-> strokes your hair, gives you head kisses.

-> i strongly believe he sings to make you feel better.

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

So Sooga gets along with Revali, Sidon, Riju- what about Urbosa and Daruk? I don't think I recall the dynamic between him and the others. And I think Kohga is missing a few too- i guess im asking for headcanons here.

Oh good point. All of these are susceptible to change, so nothing is particularly set in stone.

Sooga;

Enjoys hanging out with Revali. He admires not just his talent, but the fact that he hides his insecurities very well. Match that with his quick wit and their mutual love for making fun of Link honestly makes them buddies. They like to train, have tea, and have a nice crab omlette (Sooga is on and off in terms of how comfortable he is, eating around Revali). Revali, along with every other rito (namely women) have a crush on him. Sooga just, fucking attracts birds for some reason.

Sidon is his close second friend. Big as he is, a lover of fish, Sidon is annoying in a sort of endearing way. He likes fishing, hiking, swimming, collecting shells with him. When they aren't having fun outside or fucking, you'll see them indoors, whittling while Sidon goes on and on about some story. Sooga likes to listen, Sidon loves to talk. They just work.

Riju. Riju is sort of like his niece. He treats her respectfully, but having grown up with six sisters, Sooga has the instinct to care for her. He takes her out for ice cream, he does her nails/hair, listens to her rant, and even helps pet sit Patricia from time to time (and Patricia LOVES him, she blows him kisses all the time). He's also kinda protective. A boy her age tried talking to her, he went missing the next day. Odd I know.

Urbosa. Urbosa acts like HIS older sister, and while women make him uncomfortable, he trusts her more than most. She's always there to give him words of encouragement, always there to help him against some rather hungry ladies- she just has his back. Sometimes they meet up for a nice dessert and talk about what they like in men (Urbosa loves ladies too, but women are lost on Sooga).

Mipha. Sooga and Mipha get along. They aren't at each other’s throats, but Sooga isn't exactly nuts about her. She finds him slightly imposing, he doesn't like being near women-without Kohga, they're awkward with one another.

Teba. Sooga and Teba actually get along pretty well. They're both rather strong and silent types. That is, until Sooga asks about the family life. They end up sitting next to each other, tending to their weapons, while Teba tells him what it's like to be a dad. They're quiet overall.

Daruk. Daruk and Sooga...they co exist. Sooga doesn't hate him, but he isn't a fan. Jealousy from Kohga aside, Sooga doesn't like that he's loud, brazen, VERY touchy, and is constantly trying to get him to eat. Suffice to say, Sooga would prefer anyone else's company (he was once in a room with JUST him and Mipha. It sucked).

Sooga and Yunobo. For some reason, he's chosen to adopt him too, and is constantly acting as his confident. He's constantly making sure he's eaten and slept, and is trying to help him come out of his shell. The 'he asked for no pickles' meme, but in an uncle way. Sooga likes to take him out to smash boulders during the day, and hunt for fireflies at night. Yunobo once fell asleep on him, Sooga didn't have the heart to move him. He had to see a doctor for his back the next day, but worth it.

Link and Sooga have a VERY competitive relationship. They've established early on that they're rivals, and as such, wanna beat each other's shit on a daily basis. They lowkey need to stop hitting each other and just bone, everyone sees it.

The Great faeries. Not champions, but imma include it anyway-they coddle the crap out of him because he's honestly adorable to them. He really. Really wishes they'd stop kissing him, just ONCE. They're all better than Malanya though, for some reason he fucking HATES Sooga.

Zelda. Sooga...does not like Zelda. I'll leave it at that. Let's just say you shouldn't leave them alone together.

Impa/Purah/Robbie. Its fucking on site with Impa, Purah is actually tolerable, and Robbie is just fucking annoying.

Kohga!!;

Kohga of course, LOVES his lil red fishy, Mipha. You kidding me? She's a cherry! An absolutely precious lil ruby! Kohga loves her SO much, she can pretty much just waltz into the clan whenever she pleases, and gets whatever she wants by asking for it. They're ABSOLUTELY bff's. Shopping, cooking, talking about boys and taking selfies, they're practically joined at the hip. I'm telling you, Kohga would end game any bitch if Mipha asked.

Daruk. Kohga LOVES the guy! Not just because he's easy on the eyes, but he's big, loud, rowdy, pair that up with his love for food, and these two can keep each other company FOREVER. Just, be warned if booze is allowed, and may god help your pantry. When they AREN'T raining hell, they spend time at the hot springs, and let me tell you, you've never seen two dudes happier, they're like pigs in shit.

Sidon. Kohga and Sidon get along great! Nice to look at, Sidon is also just a sweetie who just. Does whatever Kohga tells him to. Like Sooga, but dumb as hell. One of the few people that BOTH of them can hang around with. Seriously though, Sidon is a big dumb sweetie, Kohga LOVES it.

Urbosa. Her and Kohga get along, in a sorta 'let's meet for brunch on Sundays' kinda way. It's a casual friendship, and honestly? It's comfortable for them. He's still lowkey scared of her though.

Kohga is Riju's OTHER uncle. He's the more 'tell me about the boys you like' kinda uncle. Total enabler, he lets Riju do all the kid stuff she never really got the chance to do. You wanna play with chalk? Absolutely. You wanna get your shoes dirty? Course! You wanna eat all the candy and go pants a royal guard? He's IN.

Revali is an ass. Full of himself, snarky, and so in the closet, they bicker ALL the fucking time. They don't HATE each other, they just fucking can't get along. They fought over BREAD once.

Teba doesn't love Kohga. He's not quiet, he squirms a lot, and even if he's asleep, he tosses and turns a LOT. Teba just puts up with him, while Kohga thinks he's boring, but nice to look at.

Yunobo is more loved by Sooga than Kohga, but he thinks the kid is a peach. He teaches him how to talk to boys he likes. Can't help with girls though. Still sweet to the poor kid though, always brings him something to eat, because he worries.

Kohga LOVES Link! They both love food (especially fried bananas), Kohga loves Link's antics, Link loves Kohga’s funny dance moves- they just click. You'll often see them napping together after a buffet of food.

The great faeries! He LOVES them!! They're big, they're beautiful, they proud and loud- they are just his gal pals. He knows each ones specific tastes, and its so easy for him to charm the pants off of them during tea time. Don't tell anyone, but Malanya is his favorite, they love talking about horses.

Impa/Purah/Robbie. Kohga doesn't hate Impa, but the girl is SUCH a buzzkill. Instead of going and getting her a girl, she's here, scolding him for some random rule. Smh. He LOVES Purah though. They're TOTAL shutterbugs together, and they both agree that Impa needs to get a girlfriend. Robbie is also a TOTAL babe. Like if dude likes to experiment, Kohga can run some tests on that DI-

Zelda. Kohga...hates that he likes her. She's just a sweet gal, and with a smile like that? He can't hate her. He visits here and there for political reasons, but they do have lunch and catch up. Him and Sooga do sometimes help pick outfits/looks as well. And...well. The royal stables are a HUGE plus (seriously, Kohga SWOONS for her white horse. He jokes that he's more handsome than Sooga. He's half kidding, that fucker is a BEAUTIFUL horse).

[hansolmates]

jjk; angel’s trumpet [01]

summary; one second, your life is flashing before your eyes and the next, you’re transported into a world exactly like your own. but the jungkook you meet in this world isn’t a renowned singer or your former almost-lover, in fact he has no clue who you are and why you know him so well. as you work to find your way home lost and confused, you conclude that you’re either dead or in the middle of the most wicked drug trip of your life. pairing; idol!jk x reader (f), alternatively film producer!jk x reader genre/warnings; fluff, angst, supernatural, idol!au, non-idol!au, alternate universes, themes of fate, language, alcohol consumption, mentions of smut in future chapters w.c; 2.7k a/n; after spending an entirety of june on this fic im proud to release it! this story is based on the prompt “I’m losing my mind!” for @btsghostiewritersnet​ BGW Bingo Bash! I hope you all enjoy this mini series and stay tuned for this wild ride

[01] [02] -> masterpost

“Just give it up!” Jungkook snaps, and you flinch at the sudden raise in voice level. Jungkook is a soft spoken person, only really having the audacity to speak up at the strength of his friends or when his body burns with attention after a performance. The fact that he chooses to use this tone around you, gets you seeing white hot. 

“How can I give up something that hasn’t even started?” you shoot back just as stubbornly. He won’t even let you in his room, and it pains you that he wants to fight out in the hallway where anyone could walk in and see. You glare at the heavy arms that bar your way inside, as if he’s creating a barrier for you, both emotionally and physically.

You hate this. For the past three months you’ve hated this version of yourself, manifested between the strained relationship of you and Jungkook. It pains you to see each other like this. Jungkook’s ears are tinged red with fever, simultaneously a little sick and a little annoyed at the fact that you wouldn’t let up. 

It wasn’t always mismatched stares and bouts of mixed signals whenever you two entered a room. There was a time when it being in each other’s presence was like a breath of fresh air, a bakery full of nothing but sweets and mouth-watering confections. That’s not to say that your relationship with Jungkook was, or is easy. After all, Jungkook chose a life that is never meant to be easy, no matter how far deep. 

But at the crux of everything, deep in your gut, you know that the both of you have that spark. 

“We can’t be together.” Jungkook states simply, pressing his coral lips together in a thin line. “My career! The traveling, the media, my crazy schedule, all of this, it doesn’t match.” 

It doesn’t match. Like the way a toddler puts a triangle block in a square space. In your opinion Jungkook is pointing out shallow, baseless reasons. You’ve gotten this far together, not quite addressing any officiality but leading to it. If all of his reasons really mattered, you wouldn’t be here right now. Unfortunately, Jungkook’s deciding to cut the line when the two of you have already sunk so deep. 

You’re both hurting, Jungkook doesn’t want to admit that. 

“But that doesn’t matter to me!” you reason, and you’re crumbling. Jungkook was once a fighter, too. Today, it feels like it’s just you who’s taking a stand, grappling on thin slices of thread that resemble what little confidence Jungkook has in the both of you. “I want to keep you grounded. I want to be the person you come home to.” 

Jungkook’s face reaches the final boss: a frustrating shade of scarlet, stunned at how shameless you are. You didn’t care, you know what you and Jungkook feel for each other is real. 

In a fit of emotion your hands reach for the crook of his elbow, grappling the black fabric between your fingers. It’s enough to ignite heat in your veins, starved of touch from so many nights apart and text messages that weren’t enough to convey how you truly felt. 

Jungkook’s eyes drag from your grip to your face, eyes glimmering. You look so small in the large hallway, empty and echoing between both your heaving breaths. There’s acute control in his expression, as if he’s grappling to reach both an inner and outer peace with himself. 

You bite your lip, sealing away your whimper of protest as he takes his hand in yours, untacking your grip. He’s not rough, but not gentle either as your hand pendulums to your lap. 

He turns his back to you, and for the first time you’re glad he looks away because the tears have already fallen. “Maybe in another world, we’d work out. But not this one.” Jungkook whispers, slamming the door to his studio. 

•━━━━━━»•»💮💮💮«•«━━•••

“Baby, it’s okay! You’ll find a new person to love!” The neverending flow of liquor and poetics is provided by none other than Sehlyung, a fellow employee you befriended after you got hired as a language teacher. 

You barely register Sehlyung’s hopeful smile through your misty eyes. Feeling bloated with liquid and far too tired to reply, you bob your head against the bar table. 

Sehlyung is the epitome of a fun time, and the first person you thought of to help quell your aching heart. A relationship that first started off as snide jokes and offhanded work qualms that eventually turned into a deep understanding and care for each other. After a long day of work she pulled through for you, showing up at the bar like a warrior in emerald green pencil slacks and an untucked blouse. At the edge of the bar she absentmindedly winds a lock of pale curly hair, sipping languidly from her electric blue beverage. 

“Listen, I get it. You think it’s the end of the world because Jungkook seems like the perfect catch—” the pretty blonde pauses when she notices your lip tremble, “but! He’s not that perfect, y’know. He—he sweats, sweats a lot, it’s like he’s freakin’ Niagara! It takes forever to get outfits on him in-between sets, it’s like clothing a wet noodle.” 

You choke back a laugh, shaking your head. “That is one flaw.” 

“A-and he’s very,” she starts waving her hands around, plucking the answer out of thin air, “competitive? Remember that one time Nabi said he couldn’t finish that whole loaf of milk bread? And then he accidentally ended up eating the parchment paper?” 

That has you in a fit of giggles, recalling how scared he was when his urge to make Nabi regret her words bit him right back in the butt. The hospital’s personal phone became number 8 on his speed dial shortly after. 

A fond, tentative smile melts on Sehlyung’s lips. At least you had it in in you to laugh, which Sehlyung knows is a good sign. She runs her fingers over your hair, forehead damp from your previous wallowing and overconsumption. ”You’re gonna find yourself a simple, wholesome partner! One who’s top-tier normie and will have all the time in the world for you!” 

You grimace at the thought, despite how uplifting that sounds. You once thought that was the only life for you, a nuclear family with two point five kids (the half point being a puppy, of course.) While you wouldn’t mind that kind of life, after meeting Jungkook you decided long ago that all you ever needed in a relationship was his company and combined happiness. 

“Time isn’t the issue,” you slur, voice warped from how your lips fall tiredly against your arm. “This issue is that he doesn’t want to try.” 

Sehlyung doesn’t say anything to that, but instead prefers to pour you another glass of liquid despair. Of course, she knew how Jungkook got. Sweet and caring, but headstrong, letting nothing get in the way of his music. 

Evidently, you’re one of those things. 

“Boys are dumb,” she says simply, swinging her head back. 

“I’ll be okay,” you murmur, “it just hurts. There’s no closure, y’know? I feel it, I feel so much love for him. And I know he feels, he feels something.” 

Sehlyung bites her lip, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Hey, I got you a gift.” 

That gets you to perk up, your head tipping a miniscule degree. She pulls out a glass, filled with a clear liquid. It’s small, almost vial-shaped, enough for barely two shots. Inside, there’s a young flower shaped like a bellsprout. 

“It’s angel wine,” she chirps, pulling your shot glass to give you a hearty pour. “The old lady was selling it when I was getting my mom her ginger wine.” 

“Hm, is it like ginseng?” you ask curiously, grabbing the now half-empty bottle where the wet flower sat. The bell shape, despite being bloated with residual wine, still clung vibrantly to the glass. The bumblebee yellow and sunset orange tint looking absolutely mesmerizing. However, you’ve never seen an infused liquor quite like this. 

“Think so,” Sehlyung shrugs, “I’m sure you’ll like it though! I told her about how you got dumped and she said you’d need this to cap off your night!” 

She snatches the bottle from your hands, making sure it’s sealed tight before slipping into your purse. “That wine’s special, baby,” she winks, “save it for yourself when you get home, alright?” 

“Gee, Lyungie,” you deadpan, swirling the fragrant liquid, “I’m so glad my boy drama is spreading to your wine dealer.” 

Your friend holds her own drink in a toast, urging you to drink up. You don’t need to be told twice, the floral liquid going down surprisingly smooth. It’s sweet, and your whole body tingles. It’s like the feeling of being outside, and the sun shines over your exposed skin like a warm kiss. For a brief moment, you feel like you’re seeing pink and orange, blissfully satiated. 

“Mm,” you hum, licking your lips in hopes the feeling will return to you, “that’s some good stuff, got anymore?” 

Sehlyung scoffs, only mildly jealous that you get that particular drink all to yourself. “I wish. An arm and a leg cost me that, my hometown is very far!” 

The rest of the night is a haze, a comfortable one. Sehlyung goes off about Namjoon and his countless wardrobe malfunctions, keeping her from going home on time one way too many nights. You talk about how you’re getting into real progress with Soobin’s English, and how he doesn’t complain his head hurts when he speaks in full sentences. Hopefully he isn’t too mad when you send him a pop quiz next Tuesday. 

Sehlyung’s cab drops you off first, and she bids you a hug and kiss goodbye. She tells you to come a little early before your first class, because she wants to redesign Seokjin’s blazer for a new shoot and she wants you to pick out the best crystals. 

You know she just wants to show off and that your opinion is minimal because most of the decisions are made weeks before, but the gesture is appreciated. From Sehlyung’s knowing gaze, you have a feeling that she’s also doing this because she wants to keep you at arm’s length for as long as possible. 

The cab zips away first, leaving you in front of your apartment complex. You’re teetering on your heels like an infant, and you’re surprised that you managed to fake-sober this far into the night. 

Speaking of. It’s beautiful outside. With a tired sigh, you wrap yourself further into your burgundy knitted scarf, begging for warmth. You feel a fresh bout of tears surfacing as you look onto the pale yellow moon, shrouded by thick ghosty clouds among the starless sky. You wonder if Jungkook is looking at the same moon, thinking the same thing. 

You shake your head and wipe your tears, absolving you of that romantic notion. Jungkook hasn’t had the time to look at the stars in so long. You imagine he’s probably either working or sleeping soundly in his bunk, completely oblivious of the semi-depressing night you’ve had. You don’t know if it’s a blessing or a curse that Jungkook doesn’t have the opportunity to dwell on feelings for too long. 

The midnight sky starts to flicker, as if night and day are competing for dominance. Either that, or it’s really late in the night and early in the day. Your vision starts to blur, and you wonder if the secretary at the front desk would be so kind as to help you up to your apartment. It’s embarrassing, but it’s better than you cracking your skull open in the middle of the hallway where anyone can find you. You clutch your head, bemoaning on how much alcohol must be running through your blood if you’re hallucinating this much. 

Wiping your bleary face, you dig into your purse for your keys. Upon pulling out the key your favorite lip balm rolls onto the street. A little part of you feels like leaving it behind so you can get to bed, but it’s your favorite one and you are so close to finishing it. Muttering a curse at the thought of bending down at the possibility of you vomiting in public, you quickly scramble to the ground. Your knees buck at the pavement, tiny stones digging into your skin. Focusing your gaze on the pink and blue plastic, you reach for the glittery tube. 

Unfortunately, you’re not quick enough to notice the moving truck swerve the corner and skid towards your body. 

•━━━━━━»•»💮💮💮«•«━━•••

The first thing you notice is that it’s unbearably bright. Like when you vegetate in a dark classroom watching a movie, and the teacher suddenly flips the lights on without warning and your brain panics from the shock. 

You’re also painfully sober, as if you didn’t have a liquor-based dinner. Your bladder doesn’t feel like a small child is sitting on it, and you’re wide awake. 

Someone’s yelling at you, their voice shrill from emotion yet gravely from the early morning. Suddenly there’s a whip of hot air against your hair and a harsh skid as the smell of tire on gravel fills your nose. You’re on sensory overload, and you don’t have the capacity to care about your surroundings. 

This is probably the third time you have to mentally repeat to yourself that it’s daytime, the sun shining brightly on your fallen form. Your body is splayed out in a half-starfish position, and you quickly close your legs in fear of someone seeing up your skirt. You put up a hand to cover your face, and it’s instantly snatched up by a larger one. 

“Hey, hey! Are you okay? I know I turned the corner pretty fast, but you shouldn’t be standing in the middle of the street like that!” the person calling you sounds frantic, frustrated at your lack of response. 

Your eyes flicker to the small jet black cruiser strewn across the sidewalk, haphazardly parked. Fingers curling around the person’s hand, you look up at their face and scream. 

It’s now their turn to collapse on the floor, eyes wide and terrified. Their soft black hair is fluffy and sweaty from using their helmet, now rolling away from their grip. 

“What?” he screams back, as if there’s something on his face. His hand whips up to clutch his collar, undoing the top button because he’s starting to sweat profusely. “Are you really injured? Do I need to call an ambulance or something—” 

“Jungkook!” you cry, ripping the woolen scarf from your neck to wrap it around the top half of his face. You scramble between his legs, making sure his piercings, tattoos and any other identifiable part of his body is concealed. You don’t even think about your fight from last night, knowing that it’s miniscule in comparison to Jungkook being swarmed by PR. “Kook, what the fuck? It’s broad daylight, you can’t be out like this without a mask! Where on earth did you hide that bike? Why—are you wearing fucking pastel green? Since when have you added color to your wardrobe?” the boy noticeably pauses at the attention to his outfit, tensing under your ministrations. “Dispatch will have your ass and the devil Min Yoongi’ll kill you again for sneaking out—”

It’s then that Jungkook snaps, two strong arms pushing you away like paper. You don’t expect Jungkook to ever lay a hand on you, and with a surprised yelp you’re painfully shoved onto the pavement.  

“Get off of me!” he cries, and throws your scarf on your lap. “Who the hell are you and why do you know my name?” 

He’s scared, holding his helmet like you’ve burned him. His doe eyes are glistening and dewy, as if you’re someone he should be running away from. 

“Jungkook—” and as you hold out your hand to him, you realize. 

I’m losing my mind, you think, clutching your head to double-check no injury has come to your brain. His hair is much, much longer. It waves and falls into his eyes, as if he’s just gotten out of bed. He’s wearing a backpack, and you notice some crumpled post-its sticking out of the zipper. Clipped around his neck is a university ID. Heck, he isn’t even wearing an outfit you recognize. Gone are the cargos and oversized sweats, replaced with professionally tapered dress pants and a plain polo. 

Is...  is Jungkook wearing khakis? 

It’s daylight, you’re sober, and the Jungkook that’s standing in front of you is not your Jungkook. 

[hinatas-sunshine]

✩ “She’s Almost...Cat Like?” ✩

Nishinoya X Reader

Request: Hello! I was wondering If I could request a fic for Nishinoya where he finds out that the reader is cursed by the cat spirt similar to Kyo from Fruits basket when ever she's hugged or embraced by a male she turns into a cat. - @loveforbakugo

Genre: Fluff, Little Angst

Warnings: Some spoilers if you haven’t finished Haikyuu or Fruits Basket!

A/N: My inbox is a little busy since I got back but I wanted to finish Fruits Basket before writing this and I HAVE IT WAS SO GOOD 10/10 🐈‍⬛🤍 this is bad but it’s wtv I’ll probably rewrite it as a headcanon in the future 😗

“You know we’ve been friends for years and you have never given me a hug! Not even after we got to nationals!”

You froze in your spot, feeling your stomach turn. What were you supposed to say? You know Noya is all about showing instead of saying... you forced yourself out of your own thoughts and looked at your pouting friend sitting on your bed.

“I just prefer not to Noya I’m not about physical affection.” You shrugged giggling. He dramatically threw himself back onto your bed while your smile dropped. If he knew the truth about you, he’d leave. Stop thinking like that! Noya isn’t that type of person! But still... if he found out everyone would despise you even more... you don’t need more reasons to be a burden-

“Y/n? You okay? You know you don’t have to give me a hug it was just a joke!” Noya frantically got up while you backed away, “No! don’t worry it’s not that! I just zoned out.” You smiled at him again while he nodded.

To stay safe, you and your family all kept this secret from everyone. You had been sent to school with the other Zodiac memebera such as Sugawara, The Rat Spirit and Tanaka, The Dog spirit. It was hard to do so for yourself but since they spend their time around boys so much, it was easy for them. You really did try to block out all of the boys from entering your life but upon hearing you’re “Very Distantly Related” they all brought you in as a manager.

——————

“Well look who woke up on the wrong side of the bed again today.”

“TSUKI! Leave y/n alone!”

You glared daggers at the blonde haired boy while he pretended to be spooked. “You wanna talk about wrong side of the bed?! I’ll snap your glasses in half right now!” You yelled while you and the boy approached each other, not breaking your glare at one another.

“I’d like to see you reach them.” You opened your mouth to speak until you felt someone take you by the back of your backpack and drag you back. “Y/n, you should really watch what you do. Tsuki is just trying to push your buttons.” You turned to Suga who stopped and turned to look at you. You huffed, “Why does the bean pole always get the last say?!” Suga brushed off your comment while you kept your angry face.

You had to admit, Suga was right. Your buttons were pushed, and they were quite easy to push. Still, you couldn’t allow yourself to get to close to these people. No one in your family even knew you were friends with Noya and if they did they would all freak on you again. The only one who knows is Suga, the rat spirit.

“You let yourself get your buttons pushed too often.” You scoffed and shoved Suga off of you, “I don’t wanna hear it from you.” You sneered at Suga who only sighed, “And I don’t want to keep saving you everytime so stop getting into so many arguments with Tsukishima.” You now held a glare on Suga, “You don’t have to put up with people hating on you half of the ti- Don’t walk away from me you stupid rat!” You stomped after Suga while many of the girls from your school stepped in front of you.

“We don’t appreciate you calling our Suga a rat.” You felt your blood boil, “You don’t know anything about Suga, Tanaka or I! So butt out!” You angrily yelled, pushing past them. You were really a ticking time bomb, going off every few minutes on everybody. You wish you could be kinder but you can’t be so confident in other people.

“Y/n!” You jumped at the voice and saw a smiling Noya walking towards you with a mischievous Tanaka following. “What?” You answered a little to harshly, “Woah Kitten calm down there, you need to cool down or something?” Tanaka lazily put his arm around you while you punched his side about the nickname. “Don’t put your nasty paws on me.” You glared while he whimpered “I thought of something, If I can guess your least favorite animal, I get a hug!” Noya smiled, making you look down at a now scared Tanaka, “I should end you Tanaka, this was your plan wasn’t it?!”

“Come on Y/n! It’s just one hug!” You looked at Noya who only whined like a child, “Nishinoya that’s enough! I said no!” You looked down at Tanaka who’s eyes widened, “Why do you always want to cause trouble for me! I have enough of it!” You continued to yell with tears in your eyes.

Why am I the one stuck with the curse of the cat zodiac?! Why am I treated like I’m worthless?! Why couldn’t I be born like every normal kid?! You began to breathe heavily and run away from everyone. Stupid stupid stupid stupid CURSE. Why can’t you just go away?! You sat outside and fiddled with your beaded bracelet you kept on you at all times. It was a little calming knowing you could control some part of yourself...

You sighed, wiping your tears away. Hearing your phone ding you pulled it out of your bag.

Tanaka: tell him. I won’t tell anyone. But please, do this for yourself. I didn’t mean to upset you...

Y/N: What happened? Why are you supporting me all of the sudden?

Tanaka: No reason. None at all. 😗

Y/N: You didn’t.... Tanaka.

Tanaka: Kiyoko was going to give me a hug! Plus she promised not to tell anyone!

Y/N: YOU IDIOT!

Tanaka: I’m sorry! But I’m not planning on being alone all my life! Kiyoko is an angel and I know she’s not a snitch!

You sighed and looked up seeing Noya walk up to you, “I’m not going to ask for a hug, I’m just here to check on you.” You put your phone in your bag, before approaching Noya. “I’m sorry for pushing you, I know better. I just wish you would allow people to care for you like I do. You matter so much to me, and I want to take care of you if it’s the last thing I do! Y/n, I’m never going anywhere!-huh?

You threw your arms around Noya, digging your face in his neck. While his arms where barely about to wrap around your waist, you two were clouded with pink fog. You fell back and looked down at your (color) fur coat and tiny kitten paws.

“A cat? Wow y/n that’s a cool trick! How’d you move away so fast?!”

You glared at Noya making a chill run down his back, “I-It’s you! I know that glare from anywhere!” You walked towards him while he crouched down to your level.

“So Tanaka wasn’t lying when he said you’re a cat. I thought it was because of how feisty you were!” He laughed sitting with you putting you on his lap, “Shut up! How does this not bother you?!” You were surprised to say the least, but he picked you up abruptly, “You can still talk to me?! Or can I talk to animals!?” You sighed and closed your eyes.

“YOU IDIOT I SHOULD CLAW YOUR FACE OFF I SWEAR YOU AND TANAKA SHARE ONE BRAIN CELL-“ you stopped talking when you felt Noya cradle you in his arms. Your loud self calmed down, for once and rested on him. For a few seconds, before another poof happened.

“NOYA CLOSE YOUR EYES!” You yelled frantically trying to get your clothes, “Huh? OH! IM NOT LOOKING!” He yelled, “STOP PEEKING YOU PERV!” You threw your jacket over his head while you continued to get dressed. You held onto your bracelet for a few seconds after getting dressed, that’s another story for another time...

“Can I uncover my eyes now?”

“NO NASTY PERVS DESERVE TO STAY LIKE THAT!”

“Oh so I see Miss Feisty Cat has returned- OW!”

With a bonk on the head you took the jacket off of him, his brown hair and little highlight sprawled out crazy and his smile shining bright.

“Why are you smiling perv?”

“I’m just happy you trust me with this.”

You smiled softly at him, helping him up. You knew this would cause a little trouble but maybe... maybe it was worth it.

This was so bad Bye 🤩 TAGS:

[hwallout]

quatervois - ljy

summary: “Listen up pretty boy, we’re both murderers. We carry the souls of hundreds on our weapons. It doesn’t fucking matter who our targets are. We’re the exact same; except, I’m honest and I only do this because it pays good fucking money, and what is it you’re striving for? With your ass always covered? Pitiful peace and justice? That’s pathetic. There’s no such thing in this job.”

words: 21,7k (this was 38 pages on word im,,,i birthed a monster im so sorry)

genre: assassin!juyeon, assassin!reader, angst, drama, fluff, crack if u use a microscope

warnings: (not explicit) violence, murder, language

early an: holy shit it’s here

The way you got introduced and became a part of such a job wasn’t exactly how one would imagine.

Becoming an assassin hasn’t been a direct wish of yours. As expected, in the beginning, this exact possibility had never crossed your mind. Growing up in an ordinary, middle-class household, it was expected of you to follow the footsteps of many. Never the smartest kid in class, but with a knack for logic and solving thought experiments, you’ve imagined becoming a philosopher of some type. Nothing too spectacular, but interesting enough and different than a usual 9-5 job.

So then, how exactly have you come to holding a knife against a random man’s throat almost daily?

Of course, while young, a person is prone to the effect of the outside world and people surrounding them. Some pupils are lucky enough to live in the best surroundings and are given amazing opportunities; therefore, they grow up into kind, successful people. Then, there are those who thanks to certain circumstances end up walking a different path, all of them hoping for the best possible outcome.

In today’s society, the importance of money was huge. It was expected that every family, containing at least one adult person, was able to deal with constant fluctuation of cash and sudden, unanticipated expenses. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case in many households and those kids had to experience helpless life without enough money, while their parents fought for every coin.

It was incredibly unfortunate that it affected you as well, even so in the worst possible moment – right before university.  

Thanks to stupid reasons that could’ve easily been prevented, your family fell into dept, causing both of your parents to find second jobs. Not having enough money to continue with a rather expensive education, you felt obliged to find a job.

And of course, being so young and ambitious, but mostly misfortune driven, you thought that the future of the household was in your hands. It was a must to find something that pays good, fast.

Consequently, the first night was spent scrolling down the endless pages of Google. You searched for something that didn’t require any special education (because of obvious reasons), but would generously help your situation. Seconds extended into minutes, those into hours, days even. Finding a good job with no degree was pretty hard, yet what else could’ve you expected?  

The issue had you visiting most irrelevant sites, clicking on shady ads (and installing a thousand viruses, probably), asking strangers in online chatrooms. Lost and unexperienced, you struggled and almost accepted the proposal of being a stripper in a famous strip club downtown.  

Almost.  

The job you were suddenly introduced to was something seen in movies and video games only. For whichever reason, it appeared in a dream one night. The dream had you play the main character, dressed in all black, doing all the terrifying, dirty work with random weapons, but being paid a huge sum afterwards. It was scandalous enough to have you hesitating for a little while upon waking up, disgusted at the thought of doing it.

Still, remembering the money filled suitcase, you’ve overcome the initial revulsion fast. Unexpectedly intrigued by the idea, you thought a little research couldn’t hurt anyone. Finding a reliable site that offered information on paid assassins only took a couple of minutes. The author of the article was an ex-FBI agent, therefore you thought there couldn’t be data more reliable than this. Upon a quick look, you’ve come to the conclusion that the study was most definitely written with intent of educating people on this topic, rather than motivating them to apply for it. Oh well.

From an objective point of view, it was exactly what you were looking for. It didn’t require any special degree from any university and it paid horrendously well, with small variations on the amount due to different employers. Reading further though, you realized that not just anyone can become an assassin, or hitman, as people liked to call it.

It demanded years of training, hard work and terrifying change. The author described it as “...complete mutation of one’s mind and personality, utter desensitization to almost everything. Those people become machines...”. You didn’t doubt their words, on the contrary, you believed them completely. It was only logical that a person has to get used to blood, extreme violence, emotionless murder, which were no ordinary or acceptable sights and actions. Of course, you were in denial, about to laugh at yourself for even reading the article seriously.

But then your eyes landed on the pay again. The numbers were huge. It would definitely help. Your family needed this. Sacrifices had to be made.

The next day, you bought a burner phone with the last bits of your savings. Entering an empty alley, you immediately dialed a phone number you’ve found at 3am. You didn’t know what was the worst that could happen, seeing as you were dialing a shady number from a shady website with shady intentions. Maybe the phone would blow up – in which case thankfully, it was a burner. But that then meant you wasted money with no reason.  

Thankfully, the other side picked up and scheduled a meeting for the next day.

Everything about it was suspicious, from the first to the last moment. From the first meeting with a tall, fat man, wearing an expensive suit and a shiny Rolex on his wrist, to the moment that exact man patted you on the back for good luck on your first mission.

The training was all you’ve expected and more. Tears, sweat and especially blood were shed during that tough period. You were put through complete torture – whether it be emotional or physical. In the beginning, they had you watch videos containing mild abuse of random people, only to progress to horrible violence as time passed by. In times where you wanted to look away, a stern and strong man would yell at you, ordering to stay focused on the task – one that would make you used and nonchalant to seeing such monstrosities.

You were trained to take words, threats and even hits with a straight face, only to return ten times harder. Sometimes you thought that self-defense classes you were offered but never took in the past, would’ve definitely helped with the current situation. Simple pistols were immediately introduced to you, strange looking men always pressuring you into improving the mediocre aim. More complicated guns and snipers were thrown in your direction upon noticeable improvement.

Surprisingly, they began “paying” you from the start. The big boss said it was because he noticed your potential and incredibly fast progress, therefore used the money as constant motivation for further improvement. Unfortunately, the trainees you’ve encountered weren’t so positive about it, saying it was the boss’ way of making sure no one ditches out once they enter (“you’ll have to pay the complete sum back, he basically indebted you”). The money you received wasn’t a lot, but it was definitely a good starting position.

In a relatively short period of time, a huge change happened. You’ve transformed from someone whose eyes watered at harsh words, body flinched at sudden movement and hands shook while holding a knife, to a person who had no trouble taking a hit to the face, only to counterattack by slitting throats.

Your knack for logic and solving thought experiments and predicting outcomes came in handy, for they’ve worked on further developing that as well. They created a thousand puzzles, testing possible situations (“you have to run away, which route do you take?", "two witnesses saw you; how do you deal with them without anyone else noticing?”), always questioning your answers (“but then wouldn’t that make you more exposed?”, “what if suddenly your target chose to change their usual route?”) and having you argument them thoroughly.

You were trained to notice even the smallest of similarities between two situations, perceive possible danger/risks, predict where a target would appear next based on their recent roundabouts and analyze certain types of behavior. Basically, they tried recreating situations that would slowly introduce you to the harder part of your future job – the planning, unnoticed execution and escape from the crime scene.

The boss had personally hired personnel to train your selective attention. Everything a normal person would pass by and dismiss, you’d notice. The unusual movement of leaves in the corner of your eyes, a black bird in a flock of dark grey ones, the inconsiderable change in a person’s demeanor, a reoccurring but overlooked detail in everyday situations.

Friends weren't particularly made in such a setting; therefore, like many others, you've been alone through it all. Evidently, you've noticed other people around, mostly teenagers who were just introduced to the whole thing – yet never really bothered or had enough time to go and meet them. Everybody was just as scared and hesitant as you were when it all started. In the end, who knew who you'd have to fight against in the future. “Save yourself a heartbreak”.

Interestingly enough though, there was a boy who caught your eye. You weren’t sure when he was recruited, for he never seemed lost or inexperienced. The boy would walk confidently around the training site, shoot exceedingly well at the shooting range and progress through his endurance training perfectly.

Silently, you watched and admired the handsome boy with attentive eyes. Everything about him was as captivating as ever, further piquing your interest with every passing day. His form and skill were envious, while his mature behavior and breathtaking looks stole your breath away.

Eventually though, the boy disappeared.

Your parents were a sensitive topic. At first, they were told the job you found didn't have fixed hours, which sounded like the only logical explanation for why you never came home at the same time.

When the training became more serious and the changes in your personality and looks became obvious, you stopped seeing them. The place of stay was a motel a couple of miles away from the training site (or the supposed store you lied working at). Despite their constant messages and phone calls, pleads to come back home and stop “overworking” yourself, you stood your ground. The money you were paid was still linked back to them, and after a while you were informed that the debt was no more.  

Unfortunately, though, you've come to the point where you didn't want to back out from this horrendous job. And a couple months later, the boss forced you to cut contact with your parents.

Maybe it was for the better, because it wasn't possible to predict if they'd even recognize you. Their daughter built muscle, had a scarred body and went through a drastic change of personality. The desensitization did wonders to young minds. It came to the point where you were able to firstly watch and then execute a certain violent act (on a specialized, human-like doll), without having to look away. The two elders definitely wouldn't want such a person in their household.  

Although there really should've been, there was no shame or regret once the trainee period was finished and your feet set out on the first ever mission and first real kill.

Fast forward a few years after the first mission, and you were considered a high valued assassin.  

There really was no proper reason, but the flow of the river happened to direct you towards the more infamous customers. Drug dealers, wanted criminals, corrupted politicians, all sorts of people involved with illegality hired you. Over time, you've gotten used to it. Already familiarized with customers, type of targets and forms of execution, switching to work for a different type of people simply stopped crossing your mind.

Your prices weren't low at all. Actually, they were one of the highest for the job, yet with a great reason. Despite the victim count passing hundred, there hasn't been a single case that was ever (properly) solved, the employers always getting away with their work. Not even once have you been suspected or connected to any of the assassinations either, and it was all thanks to your tactics.

One could argue that there weren’t many ways a person could be murdered, but you managed to prove such a statement wrong. Not a lot of executions you've done followed the same path – which only showed how creative but also knowledgeable your mind was.

Because of one simple hair strand, whose color faded a long time ago, they called you Red. The nickname stuck with you ever since those torturous, trainee days, and nowadays, it helped avoid using your real name. You doubted anyone even knew what it was.

An interesting period began during your sixth year. Numerous politicians, usually the ones that heavily opposed the new government, would be found dead around the city. Not just them, but gang and mafia leaders who became too powerful and prominent in the public eye as well – many of those who hired you in the past.

Much like always, this government experienced the lack of trust and satisfaction from citizens. Rightfully so though, the public demanded change after supposed rigged elections, finally having enough of the fake democracy. Heavy and frequent protests blew up the nation, huge crowds of people led by a few brave individuals. Unfortunately, though, a few weeks in, the leaders of those would be found dead after announcing the protest scheme.

The terrifying amount of sudden assassinations were never solved or explained. At least to the public. The huge leap in numbers shouldn’t have been thrown under the mat so easily, yet it just happened. People began living in anger and fear. All the officials had to say about it was a simple “we're looking into it, but it’s not our main priority”, words that only intensified the rage felt by the citizens. That topic would always be dismissed with the same exact answer, occasionally adding that those assassinated already had “worrisome and problematic backgrounds”.

“It was only a matter of time when something as tragic as death would happen to them”

The situations greatly benefitted them; they wouldn't make an effort to explain whatever happened even if they weren't involved. All of those people worked against them, one way or another anyway. Still, the murders weren't spontaneous, and just like many others, you caught onto their sly play.

For a little while, you tried getting some insight and information on the cases. Your intentions weren’t to solve them and serve justice, but rather find whoever was the one hired by the government. It was pure curiosity to know who was the infamous colleague.

The information given to the public (obviously) wasn't much, and you were left connecting all the different cases using simple wide shots and shitty descriptions. The best source of information appeared to be freelancing journalists, who published the most details. Unsurprisingly though, those weren't enough for a proper open case either, for someone evidently prohibited them from posting more.

One thing that had you frowning was the fact that everything was way too clean, perfect and similar to your own way of work.

Closing the laptop after reading yet another empty article, you looked around the dark room. Sighing out in frustration and cracking fingers one by one, you wondered if you're supposed to consider those people your actual colleagues or rather enemies.

The clock ticked eleven and fifteen; just forty-five minutes before midnight. The atmosphere in the tiny apartment was calm, no sound other than your quiet breathing heard. Darkness filling your bedroom was only interrupted by the big moon that greeted you through an open window. Yet, much like any other Friday, the outside world seemed to be bustling with life, getting ready for what's yet to come.  

Standing up, you stretched fast and walked towards the entrance door. Picking up a black coat from the hanger, keys and phone from the little table next to it, you headed outside. Tomorrow was yet another mission, this time a man by the name of Lee Baekgon. The reason was usual, another member of a gang who had involved himself with the government, becoming an unfortunate mole.  

Thanks to the extensive week-long watch and study you've done on the man you had gotten used to his ethics and everyday habits. The experience you had and the surprisingly uninteresting and bland life of Lee Baekgon allowed you to do so in such little time – which always brought more money. The faster the execution is, the more expensive it is, and of course, you cared about the amount in your pocket.

Now, having everything planned out and prepared, you went out for a relaxing walk – as per usual on the night before. The streets were filled with people, hurrying in all directions, either coming back from their late shifts or going out with their friends.

Setting a regular pace, you camouflaged into the crowd and breathed in heavily. Colorful lights from nearby stores lit up the street in a thousand shades, creating a unique palette out of the usually dull path. Your eyes skimmed over people, not really staying locked on anyone's head or scalp. All of them were plain shapes to you, only looking similar to those who you've had the job of executing. Either way, it was pleasurable to hear the overall sound of people. The voices, laughs, gasps.

Suddenly and surprisingly, as if trained, your eyes locked onto a tall, lean, dark blue haired man walking in the opposite direction. It could’ve been because of his height or hair, but he stuck out of the dense crowd like a sore thumb. The stranger wasn't looking at you, rather ahead of himself, but you immediately scanned his profile. An unfamiliar feeling spread through your body, sending shivers down your spine.

The man carried himself with a certain kind of confidence, his steps calm and collected. He held his head high, looking forward as if staring at an invisible dot, walking towards an unknown destination. His eyes, although dark and hooded, were sharp and focused. The nose bridge of his created a slight shadow over the side of his handsome face.

Unexpectedly, as if sensing your eyes, the man looked back for a short second. Immediately, a familiar image of a teenage boy who exceeded in all training fields flashed before your eyes. Alas, before you knew it the man was taking a sharp turn and straying away from view.

The organ inside of your chest performed one incredibly hard beat, before going back to normal. Someone bumped your shoulder, apologizing right away and breaking the short-lived daze. For another moment, you stood motionless, looking in the direction of the other, the blue strands now long gone.

Shaking your head quickly and picking the pace up again, you tried processing what has just happened.

You'd see the man quite often after laying eyes on him for the first time. He even had a nickname. Blue.

Blue's fashion was quite predictable now, for the man seemed not to prefer colorful clothes. During the day, his wardrobe consisted of simple t-shirts, black jeans and occasional black leather jacket. One thing that changed almost daily though, was the bag that he'd carry. Nonetheless, Blue would always walk as nonchalantly and confidently as ever.

Each time you'd encounter him, the man would remind you of that certain boy. Weirdly enough, Blue never once looked back, no matter how many times or how close you'd pass by. No matter what though, you'd notice the same pair of sharp eyes peeking through thick blue bangs – a feature you very well remember.

The second thing that would have anyone's interest piqued, was that you'd see the man at the shooting field as well. On the days when you decided on visiting and practicing your (already impressive) aim, he would already be there. You'd watch from afar, the last couple of shots he'd take before turning around to leave. The male never once stayed any longer. Blue wouldn't even check on his hits - he'd shoot thrice and leave immediately.

A thing that many would fail to notice, would be the fast movement of his arms as he pushed the gun back into his rucksack.

Over time, you've realized that the number of encounters with Blue was too great for a stranger. The possibility of it not being an accident started bugging you. Eventually, it became worrying.

In the dead time of the night, while walking through forgotten alleyways no one really passes through, you'd see him. On rainy nights, while everyone else ran or hid away as to not get soaked, Blue would walk calmly.  

And maybe he had always been there, yet you simply never cared or gave it enough attention up until recently. Or maybe, it was something more serious.

His sight would often be locked onto his feet, hands shoved deep into jean pockets. During the night, Blue would wear all black, a mask and hood frequently covering up his face, yet the dark blue strands never failed to peek out. He'd also wear the same black worn out backpack, the one he never brought out in the daylight.

Although you've met and dealt with many different kinds of people, never once had someone managed to make you feel so curious but anxious at the same time. Neither of those feelings felt good.

Despite your initial pleasant surprise, Blue became someone who you disliked pretty fast. It bugged you how the two worlds happened to overlap at the most unconventional of times. Whether it was when you were spying on someone, following them or coming back to the base with blood on your hands, the man would make his appearance. You suddenly felt as if this stranger had a whole insight of your life and knew all of your secrets. As if he was aware of your job and worked as a spy whose target was you.

Feeling apprehensive was something you never expected to experience, especially while out of work. For the first time ever though, you thought about executing someone who you weren't ordered to take out.  

Thanks to instances such as those stated earlier, you've developed a side mission over time. As if in you were in a game and suddenly had to unlock another small part of the main story to progress. There was an undying need to find out if your suspicions were correct and what exactly was so off-putting, upsetting about this man (who seemingly did no real harm to you). And of course, if there was a way to fix it before jumping to the last, desperate solution.

Truthfully, you never got any thrill from the pure act of execution. Taking someone's life was as emotional as raw poetry, but those emotions were never felt by the heart, much less the brain. Sometimes you wondered what your thoughts on everything would've been if you hadn't changed so much.

Taking another deep breath, you grit your teeth and backed the scared man against a wall. With a knife held close to his Adam's apple, the man gulped and winced for the last time. Fat beads of sweat raced each other against his neck. There was no remorse for the other – neither him or the rest of his happy family.

You didn't hear the pleads and wishes of the victim, as the cotton gag filling his mouth prevented any noise from escaping. The thin blade sliced through skin and flesh in a delicate manner, effectively damaging his windpipe. The man gasped for air, but only coughed back blood. White cotton soon changed color. Watching the white material turning red didn't make you feel any different, just like the eyes of the man who struggled in pure agony.

Only when it looked like the blood was about to create a puddle on the ground, did you remove the cotton. The other gasped two, three more times, too exhausted and lightheaded to take any action. With much force, you pulled the body towards an open manhole and dumped it inside, listening to the way it heavily fell into the water.

That's what drug debt does to you.

Closing the manhole up, you stuffed the bloody cotton inside your coat and hid the knife inside of your boot. Taking off black gloves and mask, you pushed them beside the cotton and walked in the opposing direction than the one you came from.

The connected alleyways seemed to go on forever, but they were no unfamiliar place to you. To say that you used them often wasn't a lie, but there was rarely anyone else doing the same. Light steps echoed shortly; the fog that unusually filled the tight space became thicker as you delved deeper. Suddenly, there was yet another echo coming from the other direction. The person was seemingly walking towards you. Unconsciously, you prepared to reach down for the knife.

Through the fog you could faintly make out a silhouette of a man approaching. Every step you took allowed a clearer view of the other, and eventually the full sight of his figure. With an exaggerated eye roll and in pure disbelief, you silently cursed your absolute luck. It once again proved to be just who you expected.  

Blue walked with hurried steps, something you haven't seen before. Upon coming close enough to you, he looked up from the ground, pace slowing down and eyes meeting for the first time in a long while. Time seemed to slow down as well for both, one short moment extending to unexpected lengths.  

Both were dressed in similar, dark attire, carrying a fake expression of innocence. Yet, the moment their irises met, a certain feeling spread throughout their bodies, as if they quietly confirmed it wasn't a coincidence that they met here at this time.  

No words were exchanged, the moment finally ending as you passed by each other. There was a strong urge to look back after the other, but an inner voice whispered quietly, saying it was smarter not to do so. Not even when the man's steps promptly stopped echoing and you felt eyes on your back.  

A couple of steps later, you picked up on a sudden, but barely noticeable smell of human blood. For a moment, you were tricked into thinking it was the cotton or knife that were stuffed inside your coat. Still, the closer you got to a certain container leaning against a building wall, you realized it couldn't be it.

Once a foot away from the huge object, you stopped. The smell wasn't at all strong, but still noticeable enough. You didn’t want to interfere with whatever took place, but it didn’t take long to realize someone laid dead in there. In the end, it was the smell you were surrounded with pretty much daily.

Dots were beginning to connect slowly, but you were once again forced into moving. The feeling of being watched was making you feel uneasy, but this time you were tempted enough to turn around.  

There was no one standing where you expected them to. He was gone.

Sighing out loud, you turned around, took a quick left and finally walked out of the alleyway. There were almost no people on the streets, and the weird feeling was finally gone. The walk back to the base was just enough time to analyze all the different possibilities that unexpectedly plagued your mind.

It shouldn’t have surprised you that it happened so soon.  

A few rather peaceful days have passed since your last encounter with him. Time seemingly fled by, but unlike many other, these days were calm. The missions have come to a stale; therefore, you effectively used your free time to do chores and visit the market. In the end, the fridge wouldn't fill itself up.

The thin paper bag swung side to side as you walked. Cans and bottles made an unrecognizable but even melody as they clashed against each other. Lost in thought, you aimlessly walked forwards, enjoying the cool gust of wind hitting your face.  

But then, in the corner of an eye, you picked up on a man running towards you.

He was in his forties, a body of short, strong and somewhat fat build covered by a formal, grey suit. There was little to no hair in the middle of his head, while two thick patches spread on the sides. He wore a panicked expression, eyebrows furrowed and eyes all but screaming for help. It took him only a few seconds to reach you.

“Miss?” The man panted, immediately bending down to place his hands on his shaking knees. “Miss, I beg for your help”.

Glancing at his face again, you recognized the other as Mr. White - a man who has been barking against the government quite a lot recently. The propaganda he preached was slowly but surely gaining more supporters, and it suddenly clicked for you. This little rat probably had a sudden reason to feel unsafe and afraid of experiencing the same end as many others. What a shame he was brave only on the TV.

For a moment, you were hesitant, unsure if accepting to help was a right thing to do. Especially when such a person was in question. You waited a minute, while the other gathered his thoughts and managed to form coherent words. He must’ve sensed your reluctance, for not another second was wasted before he began explaining.

“I’m sorry, I feel exposed and like I’m being followed and...” Mr. White went on, blabbering something you only hummed along to, while scanning the surroundings. The park he came from wasn’t that crowded, unlike the last time you’ve passed by. There were only a few families playing with their kids and people walking their dogs.  

Nothing out of the ordinary, yet a certain man walking a tall Doberman managed to have you interested.

“...that hooded man...”

Lips moving to form a smirk, you almost patted yourself on the back for suspecting the right person. The stranger was rather tall, wearing black fitting jeans and an oversized cherry red hoodie. Despite it being warm outside, a big hood was pulled over his head, and his face was somewhat covered by a cap he wore underneath. A strong hand gripped the chain leash that held a dauntingly big, black Doberman on a trained distance, walking in a calm pace. The dog was huge, with ears pointed up and forwards, steps elegant but threatening. One could swear that it could rip a man’s head off with one bite.

“Why didn’t you take a taxi?” You asked back, cutting off the current ongoing speech.

“I tried... I tried calling for one but... none... none stopped, please help me... stay with me, wait with me” He practically begged, knees bent and hands pressing together as if praying. Passerby watched the scene unfold with surprised expressions, some even mocking the way the male behaved. Frowning at the current situation, you pulled the man up by his bicep, not in the mood for any unnecessary drama. He looked way too pathetic.  

Nodding as a reply, you started walking towards the pedestrian crossing not so far away. On the other side, at the designated spot, you’d be able to call for a taxi.

The whole time, you ordered Mr. White to walk in front - as if your smaller form would be any coverage for him. Despite not being strong, the wind was still powerful enough to carry the quiet echo of footsteps behind you. The person walked with the same pace, keeping suspicious distance.

Once at the traffic light, you stopped. The panicked politician didn’t dare move, his limbs stiff and frozen like a paused frame. At the given moment, you weren’t sure if the man was even breathing – his chest wasn’t at all moving. Unfortunately, the wait for the light to turn green was quite long. The steps that used to echo behind you came to a halt as the suspicious man finally caught up. It was then that you turned around to look at him – eyes meeting with a pair that held no emotion inside of them.

Blue looked even more handsome up close and in broad daylight. With fierce eyes and dominant aura, he seemed quite intimidating. While his facial features now resembled a grown man, they once again reminded you of that certain young boy. It was a sudden flash of clear memory, something you’ve only experienced while crossing paths the blue haired man.

Blue attentively caught onto your interested gaze, for his eyebrow rose and lips formed a smirk. Slowly, as if you were supposed to notice, he glanced behind at the motionless politician and then back at you, this time with a wider smirk. Such a bold move.

And of course, it shouldn’t have surprised you that it was him. Coincidence no more; your doubts were crumbling down like a house of cards thanks to the sudden stimuli.

The black dog watched you like prey, hungry eyes tracking every move. Thankfully, it was properly held in its place by the stronger man.

As soon as the light turned green, Blue took off, not sparing any more attention to neither of the two. The Doberman trailed in suit, walking graciously beside its owner, following the exact pace. You let him a few steps ahead, before crossing the street with Mr. White who seemed more relaxed now.

Paying the last bit of attention to the young man, your eyes unconsciously trailed down his leg. Immediately, you noticed the outline of a certain object that strained against the material of his fitting jeans. With a quick analysis, you recognized the weird shape – it was a knife.

That was it; exactly all the additional information you needed. The young boy grew up to be someone you now worked against.

Work, work, work. That’s all your mind was filled with for the past few weeks, and with a good reason. Being an undiscovered assassin often demanded immense amounts of creativity (which really proved to be hard when unmotivated) to avoid similarities between cases. Sometimes, you even had to choose the riskier and more public approach, much like today.

The current mission demanded a month-long preparation and as crazy as it might sound, obtaining explosive was the easiest part of it. You were lucky to have a couple of acquaintances who somehow had the exact stuff you needed, and at a great price as well.

For exactly four weeks, you’ve watched over a certain man, a tall, strong and well-known drug dealer called K. Besides actively selling all sorts of opium and illegal substances, the man led a powerful gang named The Vipers. You’ve never been hired by that gang, but you’ve heard a lot about them through numerous connections and accidental eavesdropping. Sometimes, you thought that assassins were the biggest threat to their employers, thanks to the amount of insider knowledge they pick up on over time.

The Vipers heavily depended on their leaders, brothers K and B. The older sibling, K, as the stronger leader, took most control over their big bites, while B did the other, sporadic and less serious work. Still, they cooperated perfectly, working in sync to create a big, illegal underground market, that the government never spoke about.

Unfortunately, they got themselves into a big fuss with another powerful gang, Weiro, the details never once directly explained to you. There were a couple of things that you could’ve suspected went down, but really, it wasn’t your job and interest. Anyhow, Weiro employed you, with a strict order to kill K in an extravagant way that will have his gang warned properly. Their request had your eyes rolling back; music wishes were never a favorite.

For a whole month, you studied the man, all of his whereabouts and paid attention to the people he interacted with from an unassuming distance. While K probably lived a very stressful and interesting life behind the closed doors of his hideouts and warehouses, his everyday ethics were pretty bland and easy to predict. Of course, you weren’t the one to complain, for it made your job easier.

During that time, you’ve also thought of an extravagant but careful enough way to finish the mission. Thankfully, creativity wasn’t a skill you lacked most of the time.  

The plan was simple when broken down. Every third day, at 4pm, K. drives from his home to The Vipers’ main warehouse. He takes the exact same route to reach that destination in the shortest period of time, driving either his black Porsche or B’s red Dodge. Both cars were one of a kind in the area. There are exactly 6 traffic lights he has to stop at before advancing to the highway and leaving the city. With some advanced work, you managed to interfere with them through a tiny device that was set up and connected to a phone. It still didn’t work at command (which you wish it did), but it bought some time by prolonging the red light.

Thankfully, your city had a wide chain of sewers that spread under every single street, numerous manholes leading in and out.  

The public town cameras positioned at almost every corner were connected to your phone as well, allowing a great view of the street you’ll be operating on – or underneath, for a better narration. Navigating through the sewers should be relatively easy, thanks to the map you’ve studied numerous times. After interrupting the traffic light, K’s car will (presumably) stop right above a manhole, through which you’d be able to set up a 30-second explosive. The car should explode a street away, killing K.

Surprisingly enough, the plan worked out perfectly. With hurried steps you’ve walked into one of the empty alleyways, immediately running towards an already open manhole. There was a bright yellow warning that indicated a hole in the ground – one that no one closed even after a whole year of the sign just standing there. Looking around for the last time, you slipped in, sprinting away the moment your feet touched the ground.

Steps echoed through the empty tunnel, contact with wet surface only creating loud splashing noises. Currently, the screen of your phone was split, half showing the camera display of the street and half exhibiting a blue button and a frozen counter. A few minutes of fast navigation through the sewers, you looked up, realizing the designated place was there. A quick look up granted proof that the plate was there. K was then taking a turn, only a few hundred meters away from you.  

With a quick and forceful tap of the blue circle, you watched the light turn red.

The powerful vehicle driving closer appeared even louder down there. When K stopped and the noisy engine came to a halt, the cameras were there to confirm his perfect position. Hurriedly, you climbed up, working the plate open with a miniature crowbar (that you carried in a backpack, along with the explosive). Then, with calculated and calm movements, the metal cover was carefully moved and the car was right there.

Huge amount of smoke entered through the opening, making you cough. Much like always, time was precious and there were only twenty more seconds. Skillfully, you securely tied the tiny bomb to the underside of K’s vehicle, closing the manhole up and setting the timer off immediately after.

The light turned green and the mighty engine roared for its last time.

Taking a clean jump down, you ran back the same way. Somewhere in the middle, you heard a huge bang, followed by strong vibrations of the ground. Smirking, you nodded in satisfaction because of yet another case well done.

Outside, on the main street, while many panicked about the car currently on fire and a dead man inside, the familiar blue-haired stranger watched with calm in his irises. He was leaned on one of the walls, laughing at the scared pedestrians and their clumsiness. Then, as if programmed, the moment you came out of the alleyway, he turned to face you.

Caught like a deer in headlights, you stopped in tracks. Blue smirked boldly, nodding slightly with a raised eyebrow – as if giving props for the finished job. Once again, an anxious feeling overtook your body, slight goosebumps appearing on soft skin. Gulping, you took a deep breath and walked right past, trying not to look intimidated by his sharp gaze.

Despite the familiarity you felt, Blue never once showed any signs of knowing who you once were or where you came from. Yet, it looked as if he knew exactly who you were and who you worked for currently, which was a worse situation to be in.

Once again, you aimlessly walked through lit up, bustling streets. Unnecessarily, you felt like a part of the normal community during these times. The chilly wind was somewhat relaxing against warm skin, serving as a distraction from overthinking. There were a thousand things that could go wrong every time, and thinking about them wouldn’t make anything easier. In the end, your skill and instincts never failed you, every move already memorized as muscle reflex.

About twenty minutes in, you caught onto a familiar person a few meters ahead. There was a small group of people separating the two of you, therefore they allowed short glimpses. Still, the tall, lean physique and dark blue hair that gleamed under the street light, gave their identity away. It was him.

The man’s posture was something you were already used to – relaxed, with steps long but calculated. His head was bent down lifting up for a second only, before falling down again. With the way his arms were positioned, you supposed the male held a phone or some sort of device in his hands.  Not daring to approach, you chose to follow his movements from a safe distance.  

A tall, strong man took a quick right turn into one of the side streets, effectively distancing away from the crowd. You wouldn’t have paid any special attention to him, if it weren’t for Blue’s gradual stop as well. Choosing not to blow the cover off, you continued with the same pace for a little while, ignoring the other as you passed right by. After about thirty more steps, you sat on one of the free benches that allowed a clear view of the blue haired man.

He stood on the same place, now leaning against one of the street lamps, phone still in hands. The device lit up Blue’s beautiful features, his stern eyes occasionally looking up and at the direction that man disappeared in. From his actions, you presumed he was the next target, and the assassin was only studying his behavior and roundabouts.

Although you couldn’t see, Blue watched the man enter one of the buildings, then waited for the lights on the 3rd floor to turn on and a window to be opened, much like always. When that happened, he pushed the phone into his jacket and turned around, happy with the final observation. You sneakily watched from afar, admiring the relaxation and carefreeness.

Then unexpectedly, Blue turned his head slowly, eyes meeting with yours. They found you so easily and that’s when you realized there was no cover to begin with. The uneasiness once again itched your skin. It was clear that he was aware of your positioning, hell, he probably even knew when you were behind him. The man’s eyebrow rose in an amused manner, before he looked the other way and walked away.

Something told you to go and follow.  

Taking careful and light steps between people, you tried to stay as low-key as possible, although the other probably expected – scratch that, knew – you were behind. His phone rang, an annoying ringtone interrupting the previous atmosphere. Blue picked up quick, talking quietly but laughing loudly at whatever the person on the other end said. Quickening the pace, you were able to get close enough to hear pieces of their conversation – unfortunately it wasn’t anything interesting, rather a casual talk between two friends. You suspected the man used this as a foolish cover.

Suddenly, he turned a corner, disappearing right behind. The phone call was still ongoing, his strong voice echoing through the alleyway for just a short period of time before getting lost in silence. You waited a couple of seconds before advancing.

It was your shadow that first made it around, but it made no effort of warning you about what’s to come. A silent scream left your lips, as the man you’ve been stalking for the past twenty minutes stood right ahead. His body was so incredibly close, minty breath fanning against your face. The corner of his lips formed a teasing smirk.  

“Hello, Red” He spoke, voice low, but with a pinch of playfulness in it. His big hand lifted up and reached behind your ear, taking a hold of a certain strand of hair. Noticing the expected color was no more, Blue frowned lightly. “Oh? It’s not red anymore?”

His act evidently surprised you, eyes wide open and lips parted slightly. The fact that he called you Red had only increased the bewilderment. A battle of foreign emotions started inside of your mind and chest. A foreign, bubbly feeling was fueled by pure hope that the other somehow remembered you, while the rational mind suspected the man’s real intentions and knowledge. In the end, Blue had never once interacted with you directly, how would he know about a hidden strand? Who did he hear it from?

“Hello, Blue” You replied, looking him right in the eyes and choosing to ignore his previous question. There was a slight tinge of dominance in your words, something that the other wasn’t quite expecting. “Nice to finally meet you”

“Haven’t you a long time ago, though?” He questioned, the smirk now turning into a light-hearted smile. Something about it had you wanting to wipe it off immediately. Nevertheless, his words once again had a double meaning. They echoed in your mind, replaying like a never-ending mantra. Technically, the two of you were no strangers, but what reason should you give him? Was it thanks to the faith that intertwined your paths or was it the history you’ve indirectly shared?

“Let’s just say I like to make things formal like this” The more you observed the man’s features, the more you grew intrigued. He was just so perfectly sculpted, and it made no sense that someone as breathtaking as him busied himself with such dirty work. Yet, God only knew what had forced the young boy to choose such a path.

“Well then, my name is Juyeon” Blue extended his hand for a handshake, once again showcasing just how big his hands were. Not bothering to take the gloves off, you accepted his greeting, somehow managing to feel the roughness of his palm over the black leather. A quick mutter of your own name was seemingly enough for Juyeon, for he hummed along and repeated it with the same tone. You didn’t miss the smooth flow of the vowels off his tongue.

Tranquility enveloped the small alleyway. Wind blew through it in strong waves, messing up your hair. Two frames stood just a step away, never once breaking eye contact, but prolonging the silence that swallowed every other sound. It was becoming awkward, yet neither knew how to bring up topics that obviously interested both.

“So, want to grab coffee, or?” Juyeon asked, breaking the suffocating atmosphere. His words served as a splash of cold water that brought you back into Reliaty, eyes averting their gaze for the first time. You watched a rat run from one trash can to the other, disappearing behind it in a matter of seconds.

“No, I actually have something more important to do” The truth was, you wanted to go with him out of pure curiosity, but a lot was holding you back. Even after imagining this exact moment a thousand times, you weren’t sure you were ready for it. Apart from that, there was yet another more impulsive reason for the refusal. You’ve been taught that everyone was an enemy when looked at from the right angle, especially in this job. Therefore, you were to deny as a precaution to not allow just anyone to use any information against you.

And what’s the most unfortunate was that Juyeon wasn’t just anyone. He was exactly your type. Which meant that he was both the most dangerous and safest of them all. The worst combination.

“But less important than following me for about...” The male looked down at his watch, an expensive device tightly secured around his wrist, “20 minutes?”. Blue's expression was one of curiosity, probably anticipating the reply to his remark.

“I had time to kill” It wasn’t at all believable, but the other let it slide with a slight chuckle. He glanced at you with an amused look, before speaking.

“Kill huh? Working so late?” Juyeon teased, the chuckle from before now growing into an audible laugh. Truthfully, this exact reply had caught you off guard pretty well and the silence that suddenly spread was a solid proof of it. Fortunately, though, the other allowed time to think of an answer properly, all while having the cheekiest smile spread on his lips.

“Why so surprised? Weren’t you doing the same a little while ago?” Juyeon nodded at your question, shoulders shrugging fast as if to nonchalantly approve of it. You were quite surprised with his quick confirmation that didn’t hold a pinch of hesitance. It felt as if he was perfectly fine with verifying all of your suspicious and letting you know about the trivial things. Logically speaking, it was only fair, considering how much he apparently knew about you.

“Well then... I can’t do anything about your time” Tsking to show fake disappointment, the male pushed his hands into tight jean pockets and gazed down. It was surprising that he wasn’t pushing the proposal, rather accepting the denial. For whichever reason, your pride accepted a decent hit. With one foot, he carelessly kicked a rock on the ground with a heel, making something underneath his shoe cling. The sound didn’t go unnoticed.

“I guess I’ll see you around then” Juyeon added, before turning in the other direction and slipping away. Before you could react, the man was already ten steps ahead, carrying himself in the same relaxed fashion as before. His steps echoed, the soles of his shoes way too hard on the ground. Upon a quick accidental look, you noticed a piece of shiny metal on his heels, reflecting off the light that happened to hit them directly. Huffing was your only reaction to it.

The whole way back, your thoughts were a hectic mess, one that couldn’t be calmed down, for they always wandered towards the blue haired assassin.

You never really liked warehouses, for they were way too open. Thankfully though, the one you were working in today wasn’t empty – crates and boxes filled with unknown substances and materials were scattered all around, as well as machinery that’s used to move them around. Overall, all of those objects allowed much cover and plenty of room to comfortably work around the broad place. Moreover, your steps weren’t going to echo too much in such a setting.

Today’s target was a man named Captain Lee, a case similar to about a hundred others previously assigned – work with government officials. You never cared how many people did what, but you supposed the most died because they hadn't paid their part of the deal or smuggled with the government. Either way, they happened often and you will never run out of work just because of that.  

Hidden and on a great distance, you watched Lee and another man (assumed government official) enter the warehouse. Unfortunately, both had a generous number of bodyguards, but luckily, none were allowed inside. The huge door was the only easy entrance option, but since that would immediately ruin the mission, you decided to infiltrate some other way. Working fast and precise, you climbed up set of drainpipes and entered through an open window on the roof. Done in less than three minutes – record time. Dropping down was a more challenging move, but nothing too bad, for you entered far enough from the two men to remain unnoticed.

Your shoes that were two sizes bigger, proved to be a bigger hassle today than ever before. The metal railing was very hard to move over without making any unnecessary sound. The mask on your face helped you breathe properly, the air being way too stale for anyone’s liking. Thankfully, there were no major light sources that would interfere with your cover. Full black attire matched perfectly with the semi-dark surroundings.  

The voices of the two males weren’t loud, but in an empty space like this, the echo was immense. It helped you navigate around or between the crates and gigantic shelves in the most accurate manner. The pistol in your hand was already equipped with a silencer, your hand reaching up to stabilize it for the last time. Slowly, you sneaked closer, back pressed against a set of boxes.

Then, unpredictably, something moved in the corner of your eye.

Stopping dead in tracks, your full attention moved to the staircase not so far away. It was protected by one of the huge machines – those you supposed organized all of these crates. Your mind promptly wandered off to the worst scenario – it must’ve been a guard you failed to notice. Gripping the pistol with more force, you aimed at the suspicious area, holding the bullet in, but ready to fire if needed.

Despite the darkness, you noticed a puff of blue hair. Lowering the gun with an inaudible sigh, your eyes rolled back, jaw clenching in frustration. The boy peeked out carefully, irises finding yours in an instant. He nodded in your direction, hand moving slightly in a low wave.  

Looks like the day has come when the two sides get to work together.

Juyeon seemed to realize that as well, for he moved closer to the edge of his cover, evidently willing to make a plan of action. For a moment, ego and pride made you think about ditching the offer, why would you ever need help? But on a second thought, he would definitely make everything easier, and who in their right mind would deny that? Shuffling closer, you accepted the silent proposal with a nod.

Although far away, the two succeeded in communicating through short signals, functionally organizing a proper scheme. You’ve got to know the male was equipped with a knife only – which really didn’t make things easier, but it was possible to work around it.

Juyeon got moving quick after ending the discussion, making his way around the warehouse. You watched his steps until he disappeared, readying yourself to fire at Lee and disappear if anything goes wrong. In the end, you weren’t going to risk getting caught because of someone else’s mistake all while already being so close to completing your part of the job.

Once in position, the other assassin threw a coin in another direction, the tiny object immediately serving as a distraction. Exactly then, both of you jumped out of cover, not giving the two men any reaction time before It was too late.

Juyeon grabbed the official from the back and covered his mouth with one hand, the other coming up to slit his throat, while you fired two rounds at Lee’s head. The pistol, although suppressed, made two sets of noises that still sounded through the warehouses.

Experienced, you knew that if the bodyguards had trained ears, they’d pick up on the sound. Therefore, in a hurry and with a wish to get out of there asap, you grabbed Juyeon’s unoccupied hand and took off running. Hurried steps probably made more sound than the shots you were worried about, but thankfully there was still no one that could hear them.

Juyeon diligently followed behind, holding onto the thin blade and occasionally looking back at the entrance door. Fortunately, both of you were able to reach the exit in a matter of few minutes. Just a moment before slipping out, he picked up on a glimpse of two bulky silhouettes entering the warehouse. Pay people to protect you, only to be murdered without witnesses. Bodyguards my ass, Juyeon thought.

Neither spoke until far away from the mission location. Walking through the woods, both tried making as little noise as possible, gripping their weapons tight just in case there was any more danger. In the natural setting, black clothes greatly contrasted the greens, yellows and browns. Nonetheless, the two figures silently walked through with determination.

Only when in complete clear, did the both stuff their weapons inside their attire, taking the hoods and masks off before anyone could notice. More relaxed and less covered up, you’d look like a normal couple taking a walk in the nature. The road you took led towards the center of the city, but it was a long, long walk.  

After scanning your emotionless face for a few minutes, Juyeon was the first to break the silence.

“Don’t you feel the smallest bit of remorse? He had a sick wife and year-old twins waiting for him at home” The question was a pure shocker. Instantly stopping in place, you looked the other in the eye with the most baffled expression. Out of everything he could’ve asked, that’s what he chose to say? Was he judging you? Was he expecting you to actually care?  

You weren't sure where he was coming from.

“Excuse me? Do you? Are you any better than I am?” You bit back, hoping the pure annoyance that dripped from your words reached the other. Juyeon’s face didn’t change at all though, it remained blank, as if your passive attack hadn’t even touched him. As if you were getting worked up for no reason.

“He didn’t have a family; I don’t sign such things; therefore, I don’t feel that way” The male replied, in a matter of fact tone. His attention wasn’t on you, but an invisible dot in the distance, somewhere between all of the trees and bushes. Still, he could clearly feel you looking at him with a suspicious expression.

“Don’t look at me with those eyes. I have a choice and I choose not to do it, simple as that. Not everyone works for the same people and has the same goals as you”

You wondered how can someone make your blood boil in such a short period of time. Much like you, Juyeon trained for years; it was a fact that he had no empathy for any of his victims – such thing was inevitable. Every assassin in training had to go through the desensitization program, and no one was different than the other when it came to feelings of this kind. So, what exactly was he trying to do with his questions?

Why did it matter if you cared or not? Why did it matter if someone had a family or not? What was the difference? Just because he worked for ‘the good guys’, he got to be the morally right one? What even was it they fought for? Peace, order, harmony in the community as a whole? Or satisfaction, more power of the hungry ones on top by murdering individuals? You had to laugh.

All these years of work and you’ve never once stopped to think about someone’s family or friends, for it simply wouldn’t have changed anything about the final decision. “No hard feelings” was one of the few rules of the whole ordeal. Killing people was your job, the execution of someone didn’t have anything to do with their sick wives or young children.  

You stepped forward, pressing a finger into Juyeon’s chest.

“Listen up pretty boy, we’re both murderers. We carry the souls of hundreds on our weapons. It doesn’t fucking matter who our targets are. We’re the exact same; except, I’m honest and I only do this because it pays good fucking money, and what is it you’re striving for? With your ass always covered? Pitiful peace and justice? That’s pathetic. There’s no such thing in this job.”

At this point, you were fuming, jaw clenched and eyes boring holes into the other’s forehead. Although your voice was hushed, it was quite authoritative. The boiling blood that flowed through veins quick only fueled your irritated brain. Truthfully, the boy did feel slightly intimidated, but more so intrigued.

“Get your head out of that utopia mindset. “Oh I’m killing because that helps keep our community peaceful”, no! You’re killing to make the rats on the top happy and get paid a fortune! You’re taking a life whoever you’re working for. It does not matter if they have ten starving children, or a sugar baby waiting for them at home. There’s a reason they should be dead and you’re not the one to question it! Much less using family as an argument! That’s pointless!”

Juyeon didn’t try and oppose your thoughts, only watched your annoyed being work itself up with every sentence spoken. The smirk on his lips slowly grew wider, eventually turning into an honest smile. Although not in ideal conditions, you managed to captivate him so much, and the man wanted to know and hear more from you, even if that meant you had to yell at his reasoning.

It was interesting how the tables have turned though. Juyeon suddenly wanted to continue observing and listening to you, admire this smaller being that held so much power and determination. It was only now that the male realized the appeal of doing so, after so many years of wondering just what had you looking at him from a distance for so long. The two of you were so different now, despite being so similar back then. Yet the one thing that hadn't changed, was the beauty of the young girl that had evidently followed her into adulthood.

He’d hardly admit it, but he was glad that faith had done its job at setting the two of you up again.

Thanks to your state, the next fifteen minutes went by without any more words. Juyeon kept a safe distance, a couple of steps behind you, unsure of what to do. The tension was beginning to make him uncomfortable. At one point, the thin blade placed inside of his hoodie moved, and the boy let out a fast yelp. The knife managed to shift in such a way that fortunately didn’t harm, but warned the other of its position.

Juyeon crouched down and pushed one arm underneath his hoodie, moving the weapon and trying to push it deeper into the hidden fluffy pocket. For whatever reason, worried about the lack of presence behind, you turned around and noticed the man crouching down, an uncomfortable expression on his face. Approaching out of pure curiosity, you lowered to be on eye level – not quite expecting Blue’s next move. Just to break the unbearable tension, he thought.

With a quick grasp of your arm, Juyeon pulled you towards him, falling back into the soft grass. The two figures fell down, one of which was smirking wide with hooded eyes and the other wore an astonished expression.

“You see Red, you’re some type of enemy for the regime as well, working for sketchy people and killing unnoticed... Be more careful, otherwise I can make some money off you too” The boy joked, voice calm but low. His sudden change of demeanor had you pleasantly surprised and without much thought, you joined in on the play. Situated on top of him, you lowered yourself down, just a few inches away from his face.

“Oh, you can, but you won’t” You replied back, a smirk of your own bidding its hello.

“What makes you think I won’t?” Juyeon answered, suddenly pressing something sharp against your stomach. In any other instance, the action would have immediately set off your self-defense mechanism, but right now, the man was allowed to have his harmless fun. Somehow, you felt the other wasn’t a threat, and your senses never lied to you.

“Because it’s against your morals, pretty boy. You wouldn’t dare. You kill only when ordered and I highly doubt I was ever on your list” With that, you managed to take home a doubtless checkmate. The man tried ignoring the way you called him for the second time that day. Slowly but surely, you took a hold of Juyeon’s big hand that held the weapon and moved it away to a much safer distance. The other let you, without any protest or fight back.

“Plus... I don’t think I’m working against you; I don’t touch anyone else but the bad guys, remember?”

At such close proximity, it was possible to predict what were the thoughts of both. Unexpectedly though, beside a moment-driven need to press your lips together, there was a hidden feeling of understanding and content. Both remained in the exact position for a little while, breathing the same air and enjoying this unique situation.

Without any special reason, you lifted up and touched Juyeon's nose with a soft finger. The act changed the atmosphere quick and caused both to giggle, pleasantly surprised to experience it recklessly Mindfully, you then hoisted yourself up and off the boy, helping him get on his feet as well.

An imperceptible crack formed inside of your soul, something that was just a beginning of a storm.

The next two weeks passed by without any encounters. You took time off to regain energy before moving onto the next scheduled and fixed mission, while Juyeon busied himself with the usual, easy executions. He’d run around the city, hang about in underground passages throughout the day and sneak through alleyways during the night. His victims weren’t big bites at all, for he had gotten used to simple cases of unprotected individuals.  

Juyeon has always been covered by the government, which was to be expected since he did work for them. Every single life the assassin had taken, was never recorded in his dossier, for it remained as clean as ever. The cases he and a few other colleagues worked on were never investigated properly, always thrown under the mat or closed by the court after a few days. It often happened that innocent people were forced to take blame, just so the families of victims felt ‘content’ and ‘justice’ - despite it being far away from that.

The boy had a proper reason for why he chose the path of paid assassination. It's not rare to hear that people who’re born in a violent environment grow up to be violent as well – and unfortunately that was exactly what happened to the blue haired assassin.

Juyeon was only seven when he had lost a dear parent. On an unfortunate night, his father had come home shitface drunk and proceeded to beat up his mother. It was sad to say, but the boy, as well as his younger brother, were used to violence, as it occurred almost daily. Their mother would always usher the two youngsters into their rooms, before she strongly took all of the anger of the older so her kids wouldn’t have to. The man had rarely ever come home sober, and the number of times they listened to the pitiful gasps and cries downstairs was way too great to count.

Still, one night, Juyeon noticed his mother laying on the ground in a pool of red liquid and her mouth parted with eyes fixed on an invisible dot. The father, enraged and unable to process the situation properly, lunged towards him. With extreme amount of luck, Juyeon managed to shield his younger brother for a second, immediately grabbing him by the hand and running out into the open.

Even so young, Juyeon was aware of everything. Raindrops fell in an even, calm rhythm on the pavement while the sky flashed every now and then. He ran almost barefoot, the socks on his feet soaked by the wet pavement. All the time, he held tight onto the younger’s hand, encouraging him to continue running despite everything else. The teddybear his brother carried was dragged along the ground, plastic nose creating a strange noise over asphalt ground.

It took a long time until they were able to find someone on the streets in such weather. One young and reliable looking woman stood under a shop shade, seemingly waiting for the pour to stop. Mindfully though, she ran out of cover to help the same moment they came into view. The woman was shocked and distressed, listening to the heartbreaking story of two young souls who spoke through never-ending tears, their voices breaking with every sob.

Juyeon and his brother were taken into custody quick, and their father was arrested in a matter of one day. Sadly, the siblings were soon separated, both going into different families due to unknown circumstances. They never saw each other again.

Juyeon grew up into a teenager with a never dying urge to get revenge on his father. The picture of his mother lying dead on the ground replayed behind his eyelids every time they closed, it only fueling the hidden fury. He couldn’t fall asleep easily and when it somehow happened, he wouldn’t sleep for long as the image would haunt his young mind even then. Juyeon was unwillingly updated on the state of his father, who he visited not even once.

Either way, Juyeon silently plotted how to get back on the remaining parent, not letting anyone know anything about those plans – which fell apart in the end. The elder died in prison two years later – cause unknown. Juyeon hadn’t bothered to go to the funeral.

The teen ended up without a revenge, nor the justice he thought his mother deserved. Juyeon turned towards bad habits and streets fights, often falling victim to toxic relationships. Everything he did was to ease off the horrible feeling of guilt and anger he simultaneously felt. Secretly, everyone feared him, his sharp words and skills, despite the boy never doing any intentional harm to others without a proper reason. The fights Juyeon got into were only when he felt immoraly wronged, or when someone really pissed him off.  

Eventually, the boy was introduced to the job he’d later become a professional at. Young Juyeon thoroughly thought this tough decision over many times, especially when standing before the big, bossy man who immediately offered him a contract. The older said that people like him tend to be perfect for the job, particularly when driven by a certain emotion – something that would drive them on. At first, Juyeon wasn’t sure where he would end up with a “degree” in assassination, therefore hesitance was a reasonable reaction.  

Sly as a fox though, the boss used unfortunate history against the rookie. Juyeon was told that if he did well enough, there’s a chance he’d be accepted into the government guard – and it fought for justice and peace.  

It was surprising how kids of different backgrounds happen to receive the same treatment and training, only to end up on different places again. One could think that since everyone experienced identical programs, they were meant to work together – when it was the exact opposite. The minor differences in performance and work ethics that could easily be overlooked, were the ones that labeled you a certain position. And unfortunately, it often depended on just what kind of person they turned you into.

Juyeon thought about his time there often. Short pieces of memory flying by and disappearing in an instant. The six years he spent watching different clips of torture and learning how to flawlessly execute a silent murder. All the days his mobility was challenged – running the same course, climbing different heights and crawling through miniature gaps while carrying different weapons.

He thought about all the different people there, all of the kids that he watched get beat up and heard scream – many of those giving up after only days of training.  

But she never did.

The little girl that always observed his practices and paid attention to his every move, as if she was trying to remember them as well. He remembered the younger taking everything thrown at her like a complete champion, determination and will for success written over her face in bold letters. Juyeon always wondered just what it was that made her so persistent.

Shivers ran down his spine as the face of the little girl in his head took on familiar lines. They formed a mature and stoic, yet beautiful as ever face. Juyeon sighed loudly, still not processing the fact that faith made it be so their paths crossed again.

How exactly the two of you managed to find each other so fast in a club full of people, was unexplainable. It could’ve been a sixth sense that you’ve developed, for the two pairs of eyes immediately locked the moment you walked in. Thanks to previous experiences and an uninteresting game of guessing, you’ve come to the realization that once again, the playing field was same for both.

Slowly creeping up to the man, you threw your hands around his neck, attempting to dance to whatever song the DJ was remixing. It was an easy way to get blended into the crowd and communicate with the other without raising suspicion. Flashing colorful lights along with the excessive amount of fake mist and sweaty people once again reminded of the reason why you didn’t like clubs. But alas, work had to be done.  

Juyeon had caught onto your plan, but the smirk and hooded eyes clearly showed that he was quite amused with your boldness. Carefully, his big hands creeped up to your hips, bringing close to his and swaying them to the beat of the song. With a gasp of surprise, you giggled, turning around in Juyeon’s hold, back pressed flush against his strong chest. The male’s head moved closer, lips lingering just above your ear. Out of pure curiosity, with a swift move, your ass ground against Juyeon’s crotch, eliciting the sweetest gasp in return. Before any remark could be made, you glanced back, speaking in such a volume that no one else heard.

“Who is it tonight?”  

“One of the sisters, Yuri” Juyeon replied, voice low and rough, soft lips finally touching your ear. The grip on your hips tightened, as a precaution to not dare pull the same trick twice. Although the colorful tints of flashing lights turned the whole room into hectic mess, Juyeon was thankful for it hid the flush that unknowingly overtook his features.

“Oh, how exciting!” You replied in a sarcastic tone. “I’m here because of Aria!” The answer received a hum of understanding in return.  

The two sisters, Aria and Yuri, while not the most influential on the streets, had managed to get themselves involved in quite a few problems with the big ones, for a short period of time. To know that the fall of both happened due to one’s mistakes was slightly disappointing. It was one of those rare cases you were disclosed all details, and simply put, it had your eyes rolling back. Everything could’ve been easily sorted out.

Despite being twins, they were complete opposites. Aria was always the calm, calculated and careful sibling, while Yuri ran around, causing problems, concerning herself with illegal jobs and getting away with it thanks to her connections. Those associates often asked for something in return, and more often than not, it was someone with some type of political power. You guessed that’s why Juyeon was here tonight. Can’t say it wasn’t to be expected.

Aria, although the more mature twin, got dragged into everything thanks to Yuri. Surprisingly enough, she managed to find a place in the community fast. At first, Aria often did the dirty and hard work of finding new druggie customers for her bosses. Eventually, she progressed and ranked up significantly (no one really knows how she did it so fast), finally allowed to deal crack and heroine by herself – while of course having to pay a percentage back to the leader. The semi-autonomy was there in theory.  

It all went smooth and well until Yuri found out. To her irrational brain, it only meant free shots of fun every time she needed it. Therefore, like a fool, Yuri started using the drugs her sister had to sell, without giving a coin back. Whatever the reason was, Aria let her.

Debt happened fast, as Aria couldn’t pay back enough money, nor make up a good enough excuse as to where the drugs went. The siblings tried prolonging their (Aria’s) payment date and buying just a tad bit more time to get everything sorted out. Empty promises were spoken through disposable phones as Aria pledged the money will be ready soon.  

And as if they were suddenly blind and deaf to the fact of being in debt, the sisters decided to open a nightclub. Apparently, the earnings (they hoped would happen fast) would be used to pay back thousands of dollars they owed.

Unfortunately, being too hopeful was never a good thing. And that’s why you were there on the exact day of the grand opening.

“Well then, can I ask you to be my partner in crime, Miss?” Juyeon whispered, nudging your temple with his nose. Although in the mood to play with the other for a little while longer, you had to get to work first. Once again turning in his hold, you nodded and began bopping along to the new beat that vibrated off the walls. With foreheads pressed together, you tried ignoring Juyeon’ sharp gaze and focusing on discussing a plan of action.

°•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° 

It was unusually easy to get inside of the security room, turn the cameras off and delete all footage of the current night. With a bit of secretive work, two assassins found a blueprint of the whole floor, familiarizing themselves with all important points of the nightclub – first and foremost the security room. Immediately, both got to work.

Thanks to your moderately revealing outfit and Oscar-worthy acting (no sarcasm intended), you worked as a distraction in the first part of the plan. Accidentally walking into a male bathroom, you managed to gain attention of drunk and drugged men. As expected, they followed out like hungry dogs.  

In the meantime, Juyeon slipped in and out of the bathroom through an open window. The drain pipes, weird infrastructure and façade of the whole building, allowed him to make his way around and towards the security room. The window was barely open, but with a bit of force, it was lifted up higher and Juyeon jumped in without much sound.  

With quick work of skilled fingers, the footage was deleted and all cameras were disabled for the night. Following the same path, the male left, making sure to lower the window into its previous position before returning to the bathroom. Luckily, your charm and flirty words worked well enough to keep other men outside the room until Juyeon came back.

He felt wronged seeing everyone looking you up and down as if you were some type of provocative art piece, hoping to get a feeling with their nasty fingers. Immediately, Juyeon approached the little group and wrapped a protective arm around your shoulder, leading you away. Sounds of disapproval were heard from the rest, but neither paid no mind, already focused on the next piece of the plan.

°•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° 

Keeping up the cover often required creative and interesting measures. You’ve been there, done that many times, yet never once have you made out with someone in public because of it.

At one point of the night, while progressing towards the next point, you’ve noticed a couple of guards paying a little bit more attention than usual. The amount of security surrounding one piece of the corridor was enough information to understand that the sisters (or at least one of them) were in one of those rooms. Trying to play drunk and drugged was so far the best shot at being left alone, but it seemingly didn’t work this time, as one bulky man walked towards you. The sound of his voice was almost silenced by the deafening music playing in the background.

“I’m sorry this is a-”  

Suddenly, Juyeon pushed you against a wall. Big hands cupped your face, holding it so delicately, carefully, as if you were a rose made out of glass. Yet, his lips moved against yours with a hungry and lustful feeling, only breaking apart to catch a breath before continuing where interrupted. One of his hands trailed lower, hitching one of your thighs over his hips, earning a rather surprised and breathless gasp in return. Unfortunately, the guard wasn’t willing to cooperate.

“I’m sorry, you’ll have to leave this area” He yelled, voice unexpectedly high for a man his built. Juyeon chose to ignore the other, kisses now trailing underneath your jaw and over the tender skin of your neck, nipping but not strong enough to leave any marks.

Growing impatient and with an obvious pressure from his colleagues that bore holes into his back, the guard grabbed and  Juyeon’s bicep, effectively breaking the two apart. It took all of Juyeon’s mind strength not to turn around and break the man’s arm – that much was obvious from the sudden fire in his eyes.

“Leave” The bigger said, pointing back towards the direction you’ve came from. With glassy and hooded eyes, you watched the intimidating man, giving him a wide, forced smile. Pointing between the two guys, you started laughing, occasionally looking away and trying to suppress more giggles from spilling out. Juyeon caught onto the tactic and followed it, his shoulders rising and falling in a fast rhythm.

“I’m sorry~ we’ll goooo” Not wanting to create any unnecessary drama, you grasped Juyeon’s hand, leading the way while fake stumbling and force laughing the whole time. The male tried supporting you, and for a more authentic look, his own steps shortened and uneven.

“Drunk kids... I can’t bel..” Was all you’ve heard from the guard, before his voice blended in and disappeared in great noise that was an EDM beat.

°•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° 

Around one in the morning, when the night was reaching its peak, the two targets came out of their room. Despite other distractions, Juyeon and you spectated from a safe distance, dancing against each other for the nth time that night. As per usual, Yuri appeared high and out of her mind, while Aria dragged her towards a small terrace that overlooked the dance floor. There was a guard that followed behind.

“I guess it’s true that they’re giving a speech tonight... how eventful” With a sarcastic tone, Juyeon whispered in your ear. You looked up towards the terrace and hummed along to signal his words have been heard.

“There’s only one guard following, there must be more up there” He continued, head dipping low and lips caressing the exposed skin of your neck. Following the beat of the song, Juyeon moved one of his legs between yours, interested to see the reaction he’d get. His bold touches and moves intensified the unusual tension and sudden heat you already felt. The mission had to be done fast, since you weren’t sure how much more of this new, pleasurable torture you could take. Both were being pretty unprofessional, evidently forgetting about their main focus at times.This wasn’t at all like either of them.

“Taking them out up there is too risky anyway” You began, leaning your head back into the juncture of Juyeon’s shoulder, before speaking again, this time with a more teasing tone “Can’t guarantee that my idea is safe either, though. Are you up for the challenge?”

“Oh woah, don’t get too cocky on me now, baby” Blue replied, smirking when your head shot up to look him in the eyes. It faded fast, an eyebrow raising in a questionable manner, as if his words weren’t special and deserving of such a reaction. “Tell me. I get to hear the offer first before taking it, right?”

“You’re acting way too unprofessional. We’re here with a reason” You whined, suddenly wanting to distance away from the other, but a tight hold on your hips didn’t allow that.

“Me? Unprofessional? Maybe I’d believe that if you weren’t the one grinding down on my thigh” Juyeon bit back with a generous amount of confidence, the one that people carried themselves with when they were aware of being right. The colorful lights hid the immediate flush that overtook your features. A quick look to the right proved the man that his words definitely had an effect.  

“So? Are you going to tell me or let a chance slip away?”

°•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° 

Aria and Yuri laid dead inside a big closet, their necks snapped and heads hanging in an unnatural way. Juyeon and you once again happened to be the most compatible teammates, getting the job done and leaving the club before anyone suspected a thing.  

The time between leaving and present passed by in a blur and way too fast. Or maybe it didn’t, maybe it was just the power of Juyeon’s soft touches and hungry kisses that made you forget all about it.

Currently pressed against a cold brick wall a few streets away from the nightclub, you enjoyed the attention the man was offering. It all felt unusual and new, but not in a bad way. The wall temperature greatly contrasted the one of the body pressed against you, creating an unusual but pleasant combination. Juyeon’s lips rarely stayed on yours, often wandering down to your jaw and juncture of shoulder. This time though, he didn’t care about the marks, pink bruises now decorating the expanse of your neck. With hands in his dark blue strands, you pulled Juyeon closer, moving in just the right ways to allow more access to the soft and undamaged skin.

It wasn’t clear why both assassins gave in to the sudden want for each other. There were no evident emotions to back up their actions, just a strong need that had to be fulfilled with no one else but the other. Some could suppose it was the consequence of their blunt actions from before, while others may argue that it was something much more meaningful. A relatively new, exciting state of mind and experience that obviously didn’t have to happen, yet it did. A slipup so to say - or at least both hoped that it was.

“How can you be this hot after just murdering someone?” The man asked breathlessly, a quiet chuckle leaving his lips that formed a slight smile. His sharp eyes looked at yours with a new kind of emotion, something you weren’t able to pinpoint just yet. Juyeon’s deep but quick breaths matched yours, both trying to take in as much air as possible in a short period of time.

“What can I say, I’m a natural at keeping people around my finger” You raised a pinky up, playing along, voice low and seductive. Truly, there were missions that required acting flirty and playing dirty, therefore your charm has developed quite a lot. Still, what you tried implicating at was the situation from earlier that night, when all those men gathered around you. There was no reason to expect a reaction from the other. Juyeon’s expression quickly changed into something that resembled a frown, but it disappeared just as fast, not allowing any time to make any remarks about it.

Suddenly, the thigh that was once again positioned between your legs flexed, making you flinch and unwillingly whine. The man smirked, closing in the distance again, but not enough for yet another kiss.

“Should I be scared to become one of those people, then?” He whispered, irises playing between your eyes and lips that were just a breath away. The intimate proximity that went on for way too long happened to have a negative effect on you. Gradually, a pinch of doubt and hesitance began clouding your mind, scolding it for being too carefree next to the other. They reminded of just who the man was, and that the game currently played was a dangerous one. Without much thought, like a reflex, your hand moved quick, retrieving a pocket knife and pointing the tip at Juyeon’s barely covered stomach.

A gasp of sincere shock left the man’s lips, eyes opening wide, as he scanned your face. With an indifferent voice, but a slightly different mind, you spoke.

“I don’t know, should you?”

It was impressive to see how much effect people had on each other. Despite being busy with constant planning and thinking, there was always space in both heads to think about each other. Occasional pondering about his lips on hers, or her hands in his hair – all intensifying the anticipation for the next time.

Juyeon often found himself rushing missions because he knew the female wasn’t busy at the moment. Whenever passing by the familiar building and a certain room had even the slightest bit of light in it, the boy would invite himself over. It appeared that Juyeon risked much more than the other, and definitely much more than he should’ve.

Just out of pure skepticism that underlined every action, you never directly planned any of the meetings, rather letting the other barge in or set time and date. It was easy to catch onto his habits and when to expect a knock at your entrance door. For added security, weapons were kept in secretive places for quick use if the man ever decided to turn on you. And although fighting a never-ending battle inside of your mind, you grew to anticipate the hidden meetings. His kisses were spreading fire throughout your body, words messing with your mind and touches offering pure euphoria.

There were occasions when the two of you would meet at the rooftop, one always back from a mission while the other waited patiently. Sometimes, Juyeon’s hands still dripped fresh blood, the male not willing to waste any time on cleaning them before rushing towards you. It was a special feeling knowing that the fingers that used to do such horrifying things caressed your skin so delicately.

Slowly but surely, some type of understanding was established between the two. Then, the whole relationship wasn’t purely based on physical connection, and it meant much more than a way to satisfy hormonal human needs. Periodic talks about present worries and bothers, as well as thoughts on current events, allowed them to get to know each other better. Alas, the connection never reached its highest level, as numerous obstacles stopped them from reaching it – biggest being the female's constant hesitation.

Objectively speaking, Juyeon let himself open much more than the other did, always easy on bringing up topics to discuss about and contemplate on. He also shared much more information about himself, many of them being trivial and harmless things, but still something you stoically held back on. Of course, that didn’t mean you were silent during two-way conversations, just pickier about what you wanted to share.

Juyeon understood that, and he appreciated everything you’ve told him. That compassion was the foundation that will slowly build a more trusting and open relationship in the future. You valued his way of acting, enjoying harmless discussions and gradually getting used to having a companion who became a part of your almost daily life.

With a little bit of effort from both sides, everything was going to work, or at least you hoped. You encouraged every passing meeting, every second together, to hit the wall of reluctance with as much force as possible – still, unfortunately, it stood strong.

Blue and Red created purple during their nights together, merging with the beautiful melody of the storm that only grew bigger the closer it got.

Thanks to the impeccable weather, it was slightly challenging to get to the roof this time. However, with master level acting, fake politeness and a little bit of luck, you were able to avoid suspicion from the residents you passed by. Most definitely, and fortunately, not a single soul knew that there was a sniper rifle packed in a rather sizeable guitar bag you carried. Along with its components such as silencer, optical sight, bipod, additional ammunition...

Once on top of the building, you immediately unpacked the bag’s contents. First of was an expensive, albeit small door jammer that was installed straight away, effectively sealing the entrance you just walked through. Trying it a couple of times just to make sure, you deemed it impossible to open. Next was the sniper.

Having done such a thing countless times before, it didn’t take you long to properly set and load the weapon with a set of new bullets. The fresh smell of metal filled the small space around. Hiding behind a pile of rubbish, you set the bipod behind the cornice, muzzle and barrel pointing towards the road your target was supposed to appear on soon.  

Then, like a lightning, you immediately withdrew back, sniper pulled way behind and body pressing flush against the ground. There was a sudden feeling of being noticed and even watched, to which you were always quick to react. Keeping low for as long as time allowed, you dismounted the bipod as it only made advancing more difficult. Slowly but surely, you moved around, setting everything up on another corner with tall plants and flowers. The aim wasn’t as clear as before, but it wasn’t too big of a problem. Yet, despite the natural cover doing its job relatively well, the dangerous feeling was still present.

Taking a quick risk, you took off the current optical sight and mounted another, angled one, that allowed you to look around without being too exposed. Since you were on the 11th floor, on the tallest building in the area, there was no way someone could’ve noticed you from the roads down below. Glancing over them quickly just to make sure, the theory was deemed correct – no pedestrians had their heads raised up and looking in this exact direction.

Looking at the sky, you searched for drones or any other objects that could be supervising the area (as that unfortunately, did happen before and they had to be destroyed manually, via a gun). Thankfully, there were none, but instead of making you feel relieved, it only intensified the anxiety previously felt. Where was it coming from?

All you needed to get the desired answer, was an accidental glance over the roof of the building right across from yours. There, behind a pile of wooden planks, metal bars and all other unnecessary trash, you noticed a barely noticeable, but suspicious movement. Locking eyes on the exact spot and rolling the plastic on the sight, you zoomed in, getting a clearer image.  

Shockingly enough, there was a barrel peeking right between the two wooden planks, and it was pointed right at you.  

And then it quietly fired.

The bullet would’ve missed anyway, but thankfully, you moved down just in time, watching it penetrate the wall behind. Your heart leaped, pumping blood faster and kicking against your chest, almost as if it tried jumping out. Strange type of fear enveloped your body. It wasn’t fright for own life, rather unpleasant surprise that fueled thoughts of being outplayed. At this stage, you knew very little. Was it only one person? Were there more people? Were you cornered?

For whatever reason, the person on the other building continued firing, twice to be exact – yet both bullets hit the exact same spot as the first one. It didn’t make sense at all, but at least ir allowed keeping track of the opponent.

In a quick act, you moved, peeking just enough to expect to be fired at, but it never happened. Moving once again and receiving nothing in return, you positioned the sniper and looked through the sight for the nth time, trying to confirm if they were still on the same location. And that’s when you noticed.

A blue haired man peeking out, head cocked to the side, his sharp eyes and smirk offering a teasing, harmless expression.

Rage, disappointment and distrust overtook your body fast, blood boiling on a temperature higher than before. All emotions served as a strong reality check, a shot through the heart and mind, reminding of just who you were. They helped strengthen the invisible wall you were so desperately trying to weaken, ruining almost all of the progress made. Still, their consequences that will definitely leave a mark were your own fault and no one else’s.  

A drastic switch happened. While following Juyeon’s movements through the sight, you unconsciously aligned his head with the red dot in the middle. That person was suddenly someone who made you feel threatened, anxious, alarmed, and not the one who was supposed to help achieve change. You expected so much from him, yet all you currently felt was pure let down and anger. The inner battle was as hectic and loud as ever. A finger creeped up to the trigger, trembling as it came in contact with cold metal.  

Before the pull happened, your phone vibrated almost unnoticeably. It apparently did the right, desired trick, as it effectively broke the dangerous, fury-driven daze. With an audible sigh, you remembered who the actual target of the day was, aim moving downwards in a quick motion. Just as predicted and on time, a big black jeep turned the corner, driving into the street underneath you. Getting into a more comfortable position, you trailed the movement of the black vehicle.

First and only to come out of the car was the exact target. His appearance was immediately followed by two quick, (thanks to the silencers, somewhat) muffled gunshots, the bullets hitting just right. With two holes in his big shiny head, the man was sent falling down, momentarily holding onto the open door before faceplanting the cold concrete. Blood seeped out, painting the previously grey ground in a dark red, almost black color.

But the thing was, you only shot once.

Albeit caught off guard with the shocking realization, there was way too little time to get lost, every second more precious than the last one. Hurriedly, you deconstructed the sniper, pushing everything inside the guitar bag in a careless manner. When done, you moved towards the door and took the jammer off in record time before storing it inside the carriage as well.  

A quick glance was thrown in Juyeon’s direction, but unfortunately there was no sight of said man. For whatever reason, you were somewhat glad.

In a slow and relaxed manner, with calculated steps, you took the stairs again, making sure to appear just as natural and neutral as before. Thankfully, almost no one occupied the hallways. On the 5th floor, there were two elderly women happily boasting about their children, beside who you passed with a polite bow. You even smiled at them, but the expression was deemed unseen thanks to the black mask that covered your face.

Luckily, another semi-smooth mission was done with. You were out of the building and away from the scene in a couple of minutes, with no doubts about being seen or suspected. The only bothersome thing was the sudden change of feelings towards the blue haired man. A dangerous and slightly embarrassing switch could’ve had a very tragic outcome.

And of course, it wasn't worth missing out on the fact that for the first time, both had the same target.

You agreed on further meetings, although they were much different than those in the past. A drastic change in atmosphere was present from the first second, yet neither really wanted to comment on it. Despite being close physically, Juyeon didn’t feel warmth coming from you anymore, or at least not in the same amount as before. The male felt your body shiver under a cold gust of wind, but your skin didn’t feel any colder underneath his fingertips. When he tried offering you a jacket to cover up, you denied with a half-hearted smile.

It was unreasonably late, around three in the morning, which meant the city was at its calmest. There were less people on the streets than fingers on both hands and almost no apartments had their lights on. The moon was the most trustful source of light, its soft hues illuminating everything and making it more beautiful.

Nowadays, fewer words were exchanged as well. Silence was common, both bodies quietly cherishing what was left of a cracked relationship rather than trying to fix (or ruin?) it with meaningless talk. Leaned against the male’s shoulder, you tried forcefully letting go of tension to feel a piece of that carelessness that once existed between you. Truthfully, there was a willpower to continue fighting and experiencing the strange kind of joy, but there were so, so many obstacles. And most of them were created by you.

Neither had the explanation as to why this was still an ongoing thing, why neither gave up despite the little flame burning its last few seconds. No matter how long you searched for the answer, it just didn’t appear. A deep sigh resonated in a small bubble of space.

The biggest and constant bother was that invisible wall, still standing proud. Apparently, it grew taller and stronger every time you remembered the unfortunate event from two weeks ago. As time passed by, you became more skeptical, giving time and attention to thoughts you weren’t fond of. They whispered and laughed at a poor being for daring to experience something it wasn’t supposed to in the first place.

You didn’t even look Juyeon in the eyes anymore, always finding a nearby rock or wall crack a more attractive sight. Why? The fear of looking up and seeing no emotion in the man’s eyes was a fearful thought, mighty enough to forbid you from even trying. And why was it affecting you so much, why were you still holding onto it? You didn’t know.

Hell, your fucked-up mind was daring you to kill the man and he didn’t even know about it.

Juyeon, much like always, put more evident effort into the whole thing. It looked as if the male was aware of the trigger for this sudden stumble (not fall!), and was ready to give it his all to fix everything. Immense guilt was evident on his face, and if you looked up just once, you’d be able to read it off his beautiful features.

Despite your mental distancing and defiance, he never gave up transparently trying. You being there with him every night was all the hope Juyeon needed to continue. Even if you weren’t as willing to see him the next day, Juyeon would knock on your door. Even if you weren’t in the mood to talk, he’d ask a question about one of your favorite topics. The assassin wasn’t religious (and truthfully, how could he be?), but every night he’d pray for this tough period to end already. If for nothing else, then to have your eyes lock with his one last time.

Overall, these last few nights were a weird type of battlefield. Juyeon’s hand moved up to your shoulder, occasionally rubbing down your arm, hoping to feel just a bit of warmth there. You’d allow it, sighing and leaning into his hold, trying to, for the nth time, force a bit of feeling back.  

Either way, the two waited for a beautiful sunrise before disappearing in two different directions.

You should’ve believed the tension that thickened with each word the other said. You should’ve refused and backed out from this exact job when not even one person in the room appeared familiar. But it didn’t happen.

For the first time in an incredibly long time, the employers weren’t a part of a mafia or drug dealing gang. That much was disclosed, with a rude comment that it wasn’t your job to know anything more about them, anyway. It had your blood boiling and eyes squinting suspiciously, irises locking down every of the five men present.

Their detailing about the job that had to be done was just as, if not more, brief. Not believing that someone expected you to work properly with just three sentences of information, you asked a couple of times to have them repeated. Every time, the leader of the group sighed louder, eyes rolling back in an over-exaggerated manner, before turning around and giving a knowing look to the man beside. Were they joking around with you?

When asked about the basis behind this assassination, in hope of getting at least a little bit of early lead on who you’re dealing with, the man offered nothing useful in return. Instead of giving a proper reason, or at least putting effort into making a believable story up, he threw something senseless right at your face. Upon asking how you’re supposed to work without knowing how the target looks like, they replied with:

“They’ll be the only ones there, guaranteed. It's just a little game of hide and seek... with a twist. Isn’t that exciting?”

You were spared the detail that the target was just as (if not more,) experienced than you at these “murder plays”, and they demanded huge amounts of caution. Three main points were specified, the address, time and the fact that this was an extremely dangerous mission. The legitimacy of that information remained unknown, as they once again failed to give a coherent explanation. Despite the last point serving as a warning, you suddenly weren’t given a chance to back out.  

“Excuse me?” You said, disbelief all but dripping from those two simple words. “You’re sending me against another assassin, did I connect the dots correctly?”

“You’re a smart one”

“I don’t want to work on this case” You denied, getting ready to leave, when the other cleared his throat.

“We want this person taken out at any cost, and we particularly chose you for it. In the end, we did hear quite a lot of positive reviews... therefore you seem to be the right person, no?” The man tried flattering you, but his voice was laced with venom, lips moving slowly to form an unnatural, wicked grin. He wasn’t looking at you with fake friendliness anymore, rather an emotion that could soon turn dangerous.

“That doesn’t matter to me, I have the right to not accept the job. My signature is not yet written on the papers” A small pile of documents resting on the table was pointed at, endless rows of black text only missing a simple name written in ballpoint pen. The other chuckled lightly, gaze turning threatening in a blink time as he lifted a blue pen and spun it around his thick fingers.

“That’s easily dealt with” The weight of his words hit immediately, a shocking situation that you’re dealing with for the first time. There was no training for this and lack of experience was making you a nervous mess.  

Shuffling body mass from one leg to the other, your eyes remained on the ground, hands anxiously intertwining. There was nothing that came to mind that would help the current position, and you wondered what all of this was about. No one has ever forced you into working for them, much less threatened to sign the contract in your name.

The man chuckled once again, saying nothing but thinking a lot. This was it, they had you.

“Don’t you want this?” Another male spoke, his frame moving from the doorway and opening a black suitcase on the table. The carriage itself probably cost a fortune, as it was made of expensive leather, and the mouth-watering amount of money inside was as alluring as ever. It would probably be the best paid work ever. Still, you managed to look up from the bills and into the leader’s eyes with strong confidence.

“Does it even matter? You’re forcing me to do it anyway” The words barely made it past your tongue, their weight way too heavy. The freedom you had while working was something greatly cherished (for a lack of better words), and it was suddenly taken away. It almost felt as if nothing was in your power anymore. Fearful shivers ran down your spine.

“Well then, glad we got that behind ourselves. Sign here”

The whole process of sealing the deal was done in a matter of seconds. Your signature was scribbled in the ugliest way possible, and the pen was thrown to the other side of the room as a form of protest. The weak plastic broke due to the force of impact, the ink painting a patch of white wall blue. Turning around to leave, you stomped with heavy steps, glaring at each and every male in the room for the last time. Then, one step away from the doorway, you heard it.

Your name. Your real name.

The one no one ever used.

“Good luck, you’ll need it”

The door closed behind in a loud thud, not allowing you enough time to properly react. Just once your face hit the fresh air, did the heaviness of the decision fall upon your body. What have you done? Who were those people and why did they refuse to introduce themselves?  

Doubts filled your head – were your employers suddenly against you? Were they suddenly hyperaware of your knowledge, or scared that you’ll turn to the other side, become their enemy? Was this actually a ploy made to get you out of the game? The thought made you gulp audibly; wondering if but knowing that it was too late to turn around and tear the contract paper into thousands of pieces.

There’s also no way ditching the mission came into discussion. With the way they acted, god only knew if each and every step of yours was watched on. Holy shit.

The walk home was a long one, not particularly because time passed by slow, but because you purposely chose the longer path. Eyes filling with tears, your reaction was one of pity. Reaching up to brush the watery substance away from the corner of your eyes, you looked at the shiny finger. This was the first time in a long while that something managed to bribe out the emotion of grief. And for the first time ever, it was for no one else but yourself.

Tiny rocks sounded under your shoes just quietly enough to not ruin the perfect sneak up. The sky was grey, thin but overlapping clouds blocking sun from coming your way. Luckily, it meant you could move with more freedom, not having to worry about unnecessary shadows and their power to ruin cover.

The first abandoned building you were heading towards was huge, with main walls almost completely ruined. Chunks of concrete, bricks and other unnecessary trash created stable cover that you’d usually be thankful for, yet now dreaded.  

This was the exact address you were given, but the trick was that it happened to be a whole wide field with two abandoned buildings. On top of that, the opponent’s identity was still unknown, therefore you had no knowledge of who to look for and where. For all you knew, they could already be in position and aiming right at your head. “It’s just a little game of hide and seek, with a twist”. Instinctively, you ducked behind the nearest tree, feeling the heart strengthen its beats. Carefully and in calculated pace, the advance towards the entrance was continued.

There was a huge hole in the ceiling of every floor. It reached all the way up to the destroyed rooftop, almost as if something heavy fell from above and demolished the concrete surface. With back pressed flush against a piece of wall that still stood strong, you took a deep breath and reached down for a favorite of weapons, your trusted knife.

Suddenly, there was a strange type of noise coming from an unknown direction, resonating throughout the whole building. In the midst of a less careful and more panicked moment, while trying to retrieve the blade, it sliced through the delicate flesh of your calf. A quietly yelp of pain escaped your lips, hand immediately stretching to press on the wound. The feeling of blood running down your leg was accompanied by burning pain, and you tried ignoring it while climbing up the stairs.

Thanks to the special soft soles of the boots, your steps weren’t heard over the hard ground. They also didn’t put much force on your calf, therefore the advance to the 1st and 2nd floor went by almost without a problem. Occasionally, due to a bad step, the wound would reopen, another flow of blood quick to rush out along with a thousand silent curses.

The doorways on both floors were as demolished as the rest of the building, preventing anyone from walking through and forcing you to move up to the 3rd. Dodging and crouching down at places where you’d be exposed to the outside, you all but crawled up.

The third floor seemed different; way less disintegrated than the rest. Once there, you looked around and through the now available doorway. The corridor was very long, filled with wooden planks that once resembled doors leading to empty rooms. On the other side, about fifty meters away, there was another stairway, much like the one you took just now.

Alas, despite the burn in your calf, there was suddenly that alarming feeling of being watched.

Immediately ducking behind cover, you gripped the knife tight and took a few deep but quick breaths, planning the next move. Someone was definitely in there, and the rapid heartbeat was making sure you were constantly aware of it.

The feeling gradually subdued the more time passed by. You looked around attentively, once again taking notice of the still gaping hole on the ceiling. There was no one watching you through it though, so the trigger must’ve been from either outside or down the hallway. Remembering the noise from earlier, you completely crossed out the possibility of them being outside.

Which of course, wasn’t in your favor at all.

Peeking out just so the top of the head showed, you tried bribing out shots or any kind of attack from the other – something that would indicate where they were located. Receiving nothing in return was slightly confusing, but it also offered a pinch of hope. Maybe they moved, which meant you had a chance to sneak up behind them, or maybe they’re just hiding, which meant it could all go down very fast.

With a hurt leg that was slowly growing numb, there wasn’t a lot of time you had left before retreat was necessary. And never once did that happen. Therefore, trying to protect pride and get this done just to never see those nasty men again, you tried winging it. Pressing the wound one last time, you whispered a prayer before taking off through the open doorway.

There was just enough cover to move around in semi-safety, back turned towards one of the walls. Your eyes perceptively scanned every corner, every pile of rocks which could offer any type of protection. Occasionally, ignoring the pain, you’d jump inside one of the rooms to your right, hoping to catch the other off guard. The knife in your hands was gripped tight, leather handle shining slightly due to a thin layer of sweat coating it.

Tension was as high as ever, air becoming thick to an almost suffocating degree. For the first time, you felt undoubtedly scared. Your mind was clouded with a thousand racing thoughts, all of which only intensified the sensation of panic. The more time passed, the more your eyes aimlessly wandered around empty spaces, growing more tired and unable to notice possibly important details.

The amount of blood you lost was probably in the red zone, moving around becoming more challenging with every step. Still, doing the best possible job was always a requirement, therefore you used last spurts of strength to enter the 2nd to last room in the long hallway.

Once again met with a different terrain, you immediately noticed a demolished doorway, connecting the room to the one right beside. Upon quickly deeming the current room safe, you crouched down, sneaking towards the linking point. As if sensing danger, you patiently waited a couple of moments, trying to breathe as quietly as possible. If not for the protective leather handle, the blade would’ve sliced through your hand due to the impossibly strong grip.

Someone on the other side coughed. A curse followed right after.  

Both moved rapidly, reaching out for the other through the doorway.

You were held at gunpoint, jaw feeling the pressure of a cold muzzle on it, while a strong hand grabbed your hair, pulling it back. Your own hands grabbed the other’s collar, tugging down while holding the thin, sharp blade against their most sensitive point, Adam’s apple.

Neither moved.

Blue watched Red with surprised eyes, irises playing inside the broad space of dark brown. Your gaze tried locking the man down, scanning those beautiful features while still avoiding his sharp eyes. Unexpectedly, a weak wave of emotion hit, bringing back a piece of what you wanted for a very long time. There was a slight urge to reach out and caringly caress his sharp cheeks, cup his jaw and kiss his lips.

But there was a gun pressed against your skin, and a knife against his.

And neither moved.

The war started. Horrid battles began and ripped your heart piece by piece. Everything was on the line and an indecisive mind was as dangerous as ever. The realization that this man, despite everything that happened, was the last person you wanted to harm, hurt the most. It was the quick moment of reminisce about the old times, when everything was just starting. He was the only one who gauged new, thrilling, pleasant emotions and made them feel like they’re exactly what you needed. And it was the truth.

But the weight of the weapon on your jaw reminded of the not-so-bright moments as well. A flashback of the day you were teasingly shot at sent shivers down your spine, feelings of pure anxiety and fear coming back in an instant. Rightfully so, they were strong and rivaled the positive ones, trying to outweigh them and take control over your next actions. The man was still someone who dared pull the trigger on you, dared taking that type of unpredictable risk.  

If he dared pull it again, you dared slit his flawless, soft skin. But embarrassingly enough, you’d never have enough strength to be the first one, no matter how impulse-driven. Harming him definitely was your last wish. The thought of it even being a possibility made your eyes water, tears welling up and falling like never before, straining your soft cheeks.

Juyeon’s heart ached as well. Sadly, it opposed two separate and strong thunders. The first one hit hard, touching the intimate topic of his feelings towards you. It wasn’t a secret that you’ve changed him as well. In a word of gloom, blood and violence, you made everything disappear and instead of war, brought peace to his mind. Most of the time, it was enough for Juyeon to know that you were there, and every worry would fade away. The mutual understanding was then something he grew accustomed to and happy for. The male didn’t feel like he didn’t deserve attention anymore.

But what hit even harder was the fact that Juyeon was aware of your current thought process, and the guilt once again ate him away, bite by bite.

Carefully, the grip on your hair was released, gloved hand reaching up, thumb wiping a falling tear. Rough material nearly scraped your skin, a frown appearing on the other’s face almost immediately. Juyeon bit down on the glove, taking it off before placing his hand back on your warm cheek. The act made your eyes water even more, lips trembling and throat constricting to stop loud whimpers from escaping.

Still, the weapons didn’t move.

“Juyeon” You suddenly whined, finally finding strength to say his name. Lightheadedness was slowly overtaking your whole body, vision blurring fast. The pain in your leg although still present was long forgotten. Every letter carried huge weight, every taken breath felt like the last and you wondered if taking that bullet hurt any less. Unconsciously, your hand began shaking, resulting in the thin blade moving against the man’s delicate skin. It wasn’t enough to hurt, but Juyeon visibly and audibly gulped under the metal.

“They... they set us up to kill each other, Juyeon” The realization hurt like a sudden kick to the gut. It was supposed to happen sooner or later. All suspicions you weren’t willing to think about came out to be true and the terror spread through your body in a strong wave. Everything made sense – why those men weren’t willing to introduce themselves, why refusal wasn't an option and why no proper explanation was given to you. They were aware that if you knew even one of those things, you wouldn’t have dared to show up in the first place.

Or would you? Would they be able to push just the right buttons and play with your mind as they were right now?

You were set to break apart.

Do it. Don’t do it. Do. Don’t. Past and present were clashing together, habits and new found emotions. For the first time in a while, you felt somewhat disgusted with your job. Yet, the wheels were turning, reminding that you’ve been doing this for years and now was no time to give up under the pressure. It was so, so easy to end this all, much like hundred times before. Swallow down the hard feeling and contractions of your heart, cut through like you’re used to. Emotions were just an accident, an error in the system of a machine.

All this time though, Juyeon’s hand remained on your cheek, and only now was it only noticeable that he wasn’t holding you in place. The muzzle of the gun wasn’t as strong on your jaw as it was before. Juyeon wasn’t going to actively fight or harm you either, that much was clear. This had to end somehow, and the male was about to use his last possible chance.

“Look at me” The voice he said it with was soft, but underlined with a certain type of authority. For whatever reason, as if under a spell, your eyelids opened, irises immediately locking on his.

And then it all crashed down.

All the doubts and hesitation were immediately gone. Your hand moved, putting pressure on the weapon for just a quick moment before letting go completely. Heavy blade fell onto the ground with a loud and high-pitched noise, one that echoed throughout the whole building. The invisible wall was no more.

At the same time, Juyeon released the gun, hefty metal hitting concrete with just as loud of a thud. When the pressure disappeared and the current situation processed properly, your body went numb. Legs giving out, you almost collapsed on the ground. Luckily, Juyeon managed to catch you just in time. The male lowered the smaller body onto the ground, holding it carefully.

Your head hung low; eyes wandering all around the room, but not focusing on one spot. This was the first mission you’ve ever failed and the fear of possible consequences was scary.

Juyeon’s hands enveloped your face, just holding it firmly. Neither had an obvious cheerful expression, but there was a lack of certain something that made both seem more at ease. He caressed the soft skin, examining your face that was blank of any emotion. It was the moment of complete calm.

Upon focusing on the man, you noticed a clear red line just underneath his Adam’s apple. Instinctively, you reached out, running a smooth finger over it and listening to Juyeon’s strained hiss. A new wave of tears welled up in your eyes, yet the other was quick to wipe it away.

“Can you listen to me?” He questioned, with a gaze that suddenly turned more serious, albeit none the less caring. The breathing rhythm was slow and deep, almost as if he was trying to calm down in the fastest way possible. With a slight nod, you replied, hoping to keep enough consciousness to listen until the end.

“Let’s escape this hell” You would’ve definitely reacted greatly to the proposition, if it weren’t for the lack of energy in your body. Instead, the reply was a simple, perplexed look, a result of not quite processing what was talked about.

“Escape, disappear, perish, they’ll never know. They’ll never find us because... because they’ll think we’re dead. Isn’t that what they wanted? To wipe us off the list?” The tone Juyeon used was a hopeful one, as if the man already had everything planned and was ready to go right this second. And maybe, just maybe, that was the case.

“We’ll move countries and get new identities – I have a couple of friends that could and will help us with that. We’ll start a new life away from... away from all of this, because we can’t stay” Gradually, his words became more rushed, too many thoughts and too little time to wrap them up. “We can’t go back. They’ll kill us themselves, you know that, right?”

Juyeon was right. In the planned scenario, one of you was supposed to die today, while the other would’ve been finished off upon reporting the case. You’ve thought about it many times, making up scenarios and trying to find a way to get out of them. No one has ever trained you in that field or shown any ways of dealing with it, and there was an exact, fucked-up reason for it.

“Or we could just...” His eyes wandered off to the two weapons lying on the ground, tears welling up fast. There’s no way that was the only other option, yet...

For a moment, you glanced at the objects as well, not out of interest, but pure disgust. Just a mere thought of what could happen made your stomach twirl and heart hurt. Turning around to look at the other, you noticed a teardrop that made it down his jaw. Wiping it off gently, you smiled, speaking in a low and calm whisper.

“No... no. Let’s... let’s go. Let’s disappear together, wherever that takes us, Juyeon” The mind finally accepted the sudden feelings that were no longer confined and hidden. The imaginary, but nonetheless strong, cage and restrictions were no more. You finally felt proper euphoria of freedom.

Speechless, but immensely happy, that’s what Juyeon was in that exact moment. His chest abruptly wasn’t enough space for the organ that beat at an incredible pace, with new-found strength. Tightening his hold, the male pulled you towards his chest, into a first, proper hug. Your hands sneaked around his body, trying to squeeze as hard as possible and relish the beautiful moment. In such an intimate position, it was possible to feel that exact excited heartbeat of the male.

After a long period of comfortable silence, you quietly spoke into his chest, “Please piggyback me... wherever... I don’t think I can walk”  

“Oh my god, you’re hurt?!” Juyeon noted in an alarming tone, eyes immediately scanning your body and finally noticing a streak of red liquid on the concrete underneath your leg. He loudly cursed at himself for not seeing it earlier, hand reaching down to press on the wound. Although not fresh, it still gushed out more blood, earning another hiss from you.

“Yeah, no shit mister... fuck be careful! I wouldn’t go all baby... and soft on you if I... I didn’t feel like fainting. You were lucky today” You bit back jokingly, trying to keep the light atmosphere that was slowly coming down its high. Juyeon’s head shook at that, a quiet ‘you’re not in position to speak like that’ passing through his barely parted lips. A pair of hands worked fast on tying a thin jacket around your calf to stop further bleeding.  

“How?” He asked, confused but curious at the same time.

“I’d rather not talk about it” Your head turned away from the other, irises locking onto one of many holes on the wall. The male chuckled at that, checking the knot before standing up with knees half bent. He helped you stand up and climb up on his back, strong arms instantly gripping the back of your thighs.

“Bet you hurt yourself, clumsy”

“Yeah, bet”  

With a loud, content sigh, your head lowered onto Juyeon’s back, eyes closing as you finally drifted off to sleep. There, on the closed, but broad battlefield, the two warriors accepted their faith. They made up their minds for a different future, something neither were sure how to approach, but were more than ready to experience together. A future that didn’t revolve around blood, murder and secrecy, one that would allow both to heal and live their lives breathing properly.

Quatervois, a heavy change no one expected. A decision made fast, but a result of long, aimless thought and experience. And some may say this was deemed to happen sooner or later, but was it? If things were just slightly different...  

Guess we would never know.

AN: well... here it is? truthfully speaking, i’m very satisfied with this work, and i love every piece of it, but it has been giving me so much stress oh my god... writing has taken me so much time because i tried so hard to make it perfect and i really hope reading almost 22k of this was worth it, and that you’ve enjoyed it. at some parts, i’ve maybe focused on the main female character too much, but i think that to understand her character, it’s important to have an in-depth point of view. i’d really appreciate it (to the moon and back) if you guys could leave feedback for this one. thank you so so so much for reading, have a good day <3

[intoanothermind]

Beauty Queen - Chapter 8

B E A U T Y   Q U E E N

Synopsis: You are the Ice Princess of Narnia during the Long Winter. Your sister Jadis, the White Witch, hates that you’re always helping Narnians escape prision. She decides to hunt you down and you have to run away from the palace. What happens when you find the four humans lost in Narnia?

- Edmund Pevensie x reader

Masterlist

<Chapter 7 | Chapter 9>

—-

C H A P T E R   E I G H T

When everyone was asleep, Y/N got up slowly and silently. She left the makeshift camp just long enough not to wake any of them. She moved away a little among the trees and hid behind a bush. She spread her white dress around her, camouflaging it from the snow on the floor, and sighed. She had intended to do so since she handed the other part of the glass over to Edmund, but she wouldn’t know how to react to the possible questions he would ask. To say that she was Jadis' sister, to say that she was the Snow Witch. It was one thing to open the game with others, quite another to Edmund. And she didn’t even know why.

Y/N took her own piece of glass from the white fabric, and watched it closely. The surface was cold, blue and irregular like ice, allowing you to use spells. Both pieces were taken from the ice mirror she had in her palace room. She approached the glass to her lips and whispered the spell to her reflection. Then came the well-known image of the ice castle dungeons. In one of the cells was Edmund, with tousled hair and a scratched face. He was huddled in the corner, with a chain around his ankle. Y/N felt her heart tightening, but did everything to shake this feeling. At least for now. She then whispered a communication spell and the image became dark. With the spell activated, she saw only the literal reflection of the mirror - at the time, it was Edmund sweatshirt pocket.

“Edmund! Edmund!” She called.

Edmund shifted. He clearly heard a voice close to him. Did he really hear Y/N's voice or was that dungeon driving him insane? Perhaps neither option nor another, perhaps only longing and regret were creating illusions in your mind. But then he heard your name a second time. He frowned, suspicious. Until he finally realized where the sound of that melodious voice came from. From your pocket.

“Finally!” cried Y/N seeing the boy's face appearing in the reflection.

“Y/N? What is that?” asked Edmund, clutching the piece of glass where he saw Y/N reflex in obscurity that of a forest. Was this all a dream?

“A reflex and communication spell.” and she said hastily. “The piece of glass I gave you comes from the same one I have. They were taken from my ice mirror in my room in the palace.”

“Spell? Reflection? Palace? Y/N, what's going on?” He asked, scared. What was that after all? Who was that mysterious girl really?

“I don't have time to explain now, Eddie.” she told him, trying to escape the questions. Y/N didn't want to tell him who she was. She knew she would have to do it at some point, she just tried to put it off as long as she could. “Just hold on tight that we're going after Aslam.”

“Can Aslam really help with all this?” Edmund asked wistfully.

Y/N nodded firmly. “Aslam is our hope. I may not be a person worthy of being faithful to him, but I will do everything for the Narnian people. And I will fetch you from the hands of that poisonous snake that insists on hunting me!”

Y/N had spoken so firmly and imperative that Edmund unconsciously compared her with a queen - even if he didn’t know more than your name. She was firm, confident and majestic. But then he finally heard her words. She had spoken with such hatred and bitterness that he could almost be certain that it was much more personal.

“Do you know her?” he asked, and was sure when she looked away.

“That is not the case.” Y/N said firmly, praying that she hadn’t made it very clear in her eyes. “You must try to eat and stay strong. And please try not to say too much to her. Give only informations that will keep you alive, but no more than the necessary. As soon as she decides that you are disposable, you will have no chance.”

“How do you know all this?” Edmund asked, raising an eyebrow. He knew there was so much more to that girl than she let out .

“Just trust me, Eddie, please.” Y/N said almost pleading and smiled when he nodded. “Now try to eat something to save your energy.”

Edmund wanted to know why she was so concerned about his health. She looked almost desperate, and he noticed that it was atypical behaviour. He looked around his frozen cell, and found a tray. He took the bread from the tray and took a bite. He crumbled over his mouth, but it was better than nothing. He was very hungry. He choked on the bread and started or coughed.

Y/N started or really despaired when she saw it just by reflection. She wishes she could be there to help you, but if she went, she would be caught, for sure.

“See if you water still in the isn’t frozen!” she said, trying to remain calm.

He took the mug from the tray and saw that the liquid there was frozen. There was nothing to quench the thirst.

“If...” he heard a noise beside him. It came from the cell next to his. He looked and came across a tired and injured faun. “If you won't eat more...”

Edmund then took the bread he had left aside and dragged himself to the hole that was between the cells.

“I would get up, but...” said the faun, also crawling through the cell to get closer. “My legs...”

The man came closer and took the bread.

“Mr... Tumnus?” asked Edmund.

“What's left of him.” replied the faun, savouring the bread as far as possible.

“TUMNUS!” exclaimed Y/N, to see a friendly face.

The faun looked around for the sudden voice, and Edmund held out the glass of ice. And he was astonished to see that the faun was not even surprised by all that... Bizarrity.

“Oh, Y/N!” exclaim or the faun, with a tired expression becoming a little more cheerful and. “Always with the impressive antics!”

“I needed a way to communicate with Edmund and find out what my... What Jadis intends!” Y/N corrected herself quickly when she realized that she had almost slipped her relationship with the Witch in front of Edmund. She just prayed that he hadn't noticed. “Ah, I still haven’t forgotten you locking me in with that chair!”

“It seems that not even the ice was able to release that.” said the faun. But Edmund just got more confused. “How you get out of there?”

Y/N smiled sarcastically . “It was your cellmate, he was kind enough to get me out of there with his siblings.”

“Siblings?” asked Tumnus, a little confused, returning the glass to Edmund. The faun analysed him well and saw some physical similarities with someone he knew. “Your sister is Lucy Pevensie.” he stated.

“My name is Edmund.”

“Yes... You have the same nose.”

“Edmund...” Y/N was about to say when a noise was heard on the other side. She practically knew what it was. “Put this glass out of sight!”

She then undid the communication spell, while the boy's glass was put back in his pocket. And the vision became external again, as if seeing through a window.

They heard a noise outside the cells, like someone coming down to the dungeons. They saw the Witch opening the doors of Edmund's cell and the faun turned on his back, while Edmund crawled again near the tray.

"So..." said the Witch. “My police broke up the dike, you know?! Your little family was not found.”

Edmund was happy with that, but he couldn't let it show. The Witch then took him by the collar of her blouse, lifting him up on his fee.

“Where did they go?” she asked.

“I... I don't know” Edmund said, with difficult breathing.

“So you don't have any use anymore.” growled the Witch, playing it back to the tea it.

She raised her staff.

“Wait!” Edmund said, remembering Y/N's words. “The beaver said something about Aslam!”

The Witch lowered her staff, gaping.

“Aslam?” She asked. “Where?”

“I...”

“He is not from here, Your Majesty.” the faun intruded quickly. “He can't know anything.”

He was kicked by the dwarf that accompanies the Sorceress.

"I asked..." said the Witch, turning to Edmund again. “Where's Aslam?”

The faun looked pleadingly at the boy and he finally realized that he could not give the information he had. It would be the end of Narnia, the end of Aslam and worse: the end of his family and Y/N.

“I don't know.” he replied at last, preferring to lie. “I left before they said.”

The Witch looked at the faun, who bowed his head in thanks.

“I really wanted to see you!” said Edmund in a hurry.

“Guard!” cried the Witch.

“Yes, Your Majesty.” said a hoarse, gravelly voice. Soon afterwards, Edmund could see a hideous orc entering the cell.

“Free the faun!” ordered the Witch.

The orc tore the chains that bound Mr. Tumnus's hooves with an ax, while he whined and was dragged to the Witch' feet.

She turned to him and said.

“Do you know why you're here, faun?”

“Because I believe in a free nation.” He replied with difficulty, as swollen cheeks were a problem.

“You’re here...” she said and pointed the staff at Edmund. “because he handed you over. For sweets.”

The man looked at Edmund in amazement, who bowed his head, ashamed. The Witch lowered the staff and ordered the orc.

“Take him upstairs.” while the faun was dragged out, she turned to the dwarf. “Prepare my reindeer. Edmund misses his family.”

She turned and left the cell, leaving him there locked and alone. Or so they thought. As soon as he found himself alone there, he quickly picked up the piece of glass, seeing the girl there with a sad expression and almost in tears.

“Y/N, what do I do?” he asked, almost desperate.

Y/N had been thinking about it since she saw him coming out of the beaver dam. She would have tried, without a doubt, if I had not known that this was the destiny, that the ancient prophecy could not change. But now, nothing could stop her from trying.

“Now? You wait.” she said in a determined voice, as he stood with the glass still in hands.

“Wait?” Edmund asked, confused. “Wait to die?”

Y/N broke into an almost sadistic smile. “Wait for me. I'm already coming.”

And then she undid the spells and went to the camp to get her sword.

[artificialqueens]

Pale Yellow, Prologue (Group Fic) - Candy Cane

A/N: i know i havent shut up abt this for the last forever on my side blog but its just bc ive been so excited lol this is a post-apocalypse/doomsday au & lesbian au wherein after the world ends, people still find each other. without @chaoticnachokitten id be totally lost bc this really needed a beta and some extra confidence thrown in and im so lucky u were there to help me out <3 thank youuuuuu!!! this is very focused on the cast of AS2 bc it sparks joy so bada bing bada boom here we are. u can follow my side blog @sillylittlecandycane where i post wip updates and get wayyy too invested in these aus!! this is the kind of fic that im still fleshing out, so if u have any suggestions for thing i may have missed id love to hear it! anyways sorry for the long a/n hope yall enjoy <3 Summary: Nearly seven years after the apocalypse, Alaska has been a part of a few different groups. None have been like this one, and she wouldn’t give it up for anything. Little does she know that change is on the horizon. 

It’s been years since Alaska could look at her friends and not immediately see them as just walking corpses. All of them are on a time limit, they’re only delaying the inevitable. No one can fix this. No one can change what has happened to their lives. Sometimes she doesn’t see the point in continuing forward. And sometimes she sees those small smiles Detox and Roxy share, sometimes she hears how carefree Tatianna will laugh at a joke, sometimes she catches her friends holding hands just because, and she knows they have to try. Even destroyed, their world still holds love and hope. Otherwise, no one would be around.

The gun in her hand is heavy and slick with sweat, her whole body is sore from walking in heels for way too many miles. Apparently the price of looking hot during the end of the world is pain, who would’ve thought?

Alaska looks over her shoulder at Katya and Phi Phi, the Russian is clearly lost in thought, while Phi Phi has her weapon poised to aim, even though she looks almost bored. Alaska almost feels bad for asking them to come with her, but there’s no way she would’ve been able to go out alone.

The whole group understands the importance of checking out supply houses, even if it looks like a longshot. Even if all they find is expired food packets and half-used emergency kits, it’s better than nothing. Sometimes they get really lucky and find crates upon crates of supplies. Weapons, ammo, medical products, food, even bottled water… It’s not often, but it happens.

Alaska breathes a sigh of relief when she sees the emergency clinic come up in her field of view. Soon they’d be home, and Alaska could kiss her girlfriends and put her feet up. She hates being away for so many hours, no matter how necessary it is.

“Let’s go,” Alaska says quickly, speeding up her pace, barely checking to see if her friends are following her lead.

The hot, spring’s day asphalt clacks beneath her heels, the sun beats down on her bare shoulders, and she breathes in the heavy, humid air. There’s a storm on the horizon for sure, she’ll have to ask Ginger to check the weather for the next week.

The cozy, two story emergency clinic that is both the best place in the world and an eternal prison looms before her. It’s the only safe place she’s been able to find and make work, but it represents how trapped they all are.

At least they’re not alone. At least they have each other. That’s what Alaska tells herself as she opens the heavy metal doors. Once upon a time they were glass, but glass doors aren’t great for defense, no matter how nice they look on the outside.

She steps into what was a trashed waiting room when she first found this place and is now a well-managed front room. The receptionists desk is where they keep all their communications equipment, and is also where she sees Ginger, the one who runs the equipment.

“You’re back,” Ginger says, a wide smile on her face that Katya can’t help returning, “Almost thought you’d be gone for good.”

“We weren’t gone that long,” Alaska frowns, letting the door close only when Katya and Phi Phi come through it.

“We were out there almost all day,” Phi Phi says, “Left at dawn, and now it’s almost sunset.”

Alaska sets her weapon down on the counter, “I guess I just lost track of time.”

She looks up to see Detox round the corner, and could almost cry with how happy she is to see her.

“Thought I heard you guys come back,” Detox smiles.

There’s a worry and fear in her eyes that Alaska wishes only a kiss could fix. There’s no way it would, but she can try. The two hug tightly, and Alaska kisses her for a long moment. It’s so good to be with her again, even with the missing presence of their third.

“I couldn’t stay away for too long,” Alaska teases her when they pull apart, “Where’s Roxy?”

“Training,” Detox sighs, “I was barely able to get her away for lunch.”

Alaska understands the need to always be prepared, it was drilled into her once this whole mess started. She still wishes they would all take better care of themselves though.

She looks over to see Katya talking closely with Ginger, and figures she’s probably just relaying what all happened. There’s a ‘ding!’ sound from the computer, and Ginger leans over to take a look. Alaska’s breath catches in her throat when she sees Ginger’s expression.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, almost scared of the answer.

“It’s… It’s Alyssa’s sister,” Ginger says, completely shocked, “Her group- They’ve got an extreme injury.”

“How extreme?” Katya asks, trying to look at the computer scene.

“Gunshot wound to the torso at the least,” Ginger says with a frown, “They want to bring her here.”

“Can we even help with that?” Detox grimaces.

“Coco saved me, didn’t she?” Alaska says, biting her lip nervously.

“Do we have room? Supplies? It’s been a while since then, Alaska-”

“Who else would be able to help? There’s no hospitals, no working clinics or doctor’s offices,” Alaska reminds her, on the way to making up her mind.

“We don’t even know this person, all we know is that Alyssa’s sister knows them,” Phi Phi points out.

“Alyssa’s sister knows them well enough to want to reach out to us,” Alaska corrects her, “During a fucking apocalypse.”

Katya turns and stares Alaska in the eyes, “So you want to help.”

It’s a statement, and not one that’s wrong either.

Alaska takes a deep breath, then turns to Phi Phi, “Tell Coco she’s going to have a patient,”

Even though she looks skeptical, Phi Phi ducks out of the room, and Alaska is left with three of her teammates staring at her with open mouths.

“Well? Get to work, we have company coming,” Alaska drawls, leaving no room for argument.

It’s a longshot, but they owe a lot to Alyssa, and Alaska wouldn’t be where she is today without the kindness of strangers. If she doesn’t ‘pay it forward’ now, she may never get the chance, and she thinks she would regret that for the rest of her life.