#i would keep seeing them out of th corner of my eye while we were filming and like JUMP ajksdng

[chrliekclly]

i just remembered i had this post in my drafts for when the season ended! have some bts :)

[ickadori]

++ 𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐄𝐂𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐎

[summary] you accompany arlecchino to a business meal.

[cws] reader wears a dress but is otherwise gn. murder. short.

Arlecchino has never brought you along on her business trips before, and would have preferred to keep it that way, but you had been insistent on coming along, lamenting that she left you by your lonesome for far too long whenever she left on business.

You had fussed and moped and she had been took it in stride, planning on returning with a few jewels to join your vast collection, along with a few other trinkets you seemed to collect for the fun of it, but then you had begun to ignore her.

Her greetings were met with silence, her kisses met with unresponsive lips or a turn of your head, and you chose to stay on your side of the bed at night opposed to burrowing into her side as you normally did.

It was one the cruelest forms of torture she had seen — the withholding of your affections.

She caved very quickly after that, allowing you to come along as long as you followed one simple rule.

Never venture away from her side.

Arlecchino was a woman with many enemies. Even if her position as a Harbinger didn’t automatically make her hated by many, her own ways in which she handled others would have surely done so. There had been few attempts on her life, most people having enough self preservation to steer clear of her, but some people had been foolishly spurred on by the promise of insurmountable amounts of moral.

Those people had quickly found themselves with their heads in their laps, the lucky ones, anyways…the unlucky ones had been turned over to Dottore so he could further his knowledge on all the different ways to make a human writhe in agony.

While she never fretted about who may be lurking around corners and waiting for their chance to strike her down (a chance that she would never give them), she did fret when you were brought into the equation.

An attempt on her life was an inconsequential thing in terms of your own, and she didn’t want to find out just how badly she’d react if you were ever hurt, or worse, killed.

“As much as I love sitting around and watching two old men whisper back and forth,” you lowly start, a bored expression on your face as you turn to face her, “I’d much rather be doing something else.” Arlecchino takes a sip of her drink, black fingers a stark contrast to the porcelain teacup in her hand. “How much longer do we have to sit through this before they inevitably do whatever it is you want them to?”

“About two more cups full of tea, and possibly a desert.” You deflate. “Need I remind you that you were the one insistent on coming along?” She inclines her head in your direction, giving only a slither of her attention to the two men sat across from the both of you. They’re Fontaine’s top researchers, secrets that are unknown to many locked away in their minds, secrets that Arlecchino plans on getting, one way or another.

“That’s because I thought we’d be doing something interesting.” You stress, hands fiddling with the sleeves of your dress, and she gives you a leisurely once over, humming to herself as she appreciates the view. “Tartaglia has told me all about the things you get up to when I’m not around, and I wanted to see it for my own eyes.” Ah, so that’s what had brought on the sudden insistence that you tag along.

“You really shouldn’t listen to all the things that boy tells you. It’s highly dramatized.” You purse your lips, and just as you go to say something you’re cut off, one of the researchers -Nil, she believes- finally stopping his discussion with his partner and giving Arlecchino his attention.

“We talked it over and while we did find the offer to be mutually beneficial… collaborating with the Fatui is something that we just cannot do!” Nil raises his voice, and Arlecchino is glad that she chose to rent out the entirety of Hotel Debord. “We won’t deny that you’ve done your fair share of good deeds for the people of Fontaine, particularly the children, but that doesn’t excuse all the murdering, torturing, and brutalizing you’ve done!”

You bristle beside her, and she takes another sip of her tea as thrust a finger in their direction. “Excuse you! I suggest you watch your tone when you speak to her, you old, senile coot.” The man beside Nil chooses to be offended next, and Arlecchino places her teacup down.

“How unfortunate that we couldn’t come to an agreement.” All parties ignore her, and she has half a mind to see how long the three of you could argue back and forth before growing tired, but then an insult is being thrown your way, and your brows are furrowing as your eyes grow glassy and…

“Nil!”

The fire starts from within, and Arlecchino clasps her hands together as blisters begin to form on Nil’s skin, the blood inside his veins boiling. He’s only able to moan in pain, hands fruitlessly clawing at his skin in an attempt to quell the flames.

“What did you do!?” His partner screeches before grabbing the pitcher of water in the center of the table and dousing Nil in it - a valiant effort it was, but ultimately pointless. “Nil—Gods, what did you do?”

A shaky breath comes from beside her, and Arlecchino turns to see you watching the sight in awe, your hands splayed on the table as you take it all in with unblinking eyes.

“He insulted my fiancé, so he paid the price.” Your eyes dart to hers, and a heat completely different from the one emanating from the charring corpse swirls in her gut. “And a fair price it was, don’t you agree?”

You blink as if coming out of a daze, and your head slowly swivels toward her. There’s a mix of emotions swirling in your eyes, but she’s studied you long enough to be able to pinpoint them all; horror, trepidation, awe, admiration, and the undying love that’s without a doubt reflected in her own gaze.

“Yes.”

It’s why the two of you fit together so effortlessly.

[shinjisdone]

Ticking Springs

(A Yandere Pinocchio X fem!Reader fic from Lies of P)

Pɑɾt 1; Sluɱbeɾ

capitolo uno

capitolo due

capitolo tre

capitolo quattro

capitolo cinque

capitolo sei: is here

Capitolo sette

Capitolo otto

Capitolo nove

Capitolo dieci

Pɑɾt 2; Awɑƙeƞiƞƍ

It was a privilege to share the same blood as Giuseppe Geppetto. To be his family, his niece and take part in the marvelous worlds of puppets. The privilege to learn from him as his apprentice. The privilege to care for the things he cares for and to have the things he cares for, care deeply for you.

Tag List:

@greeknerd007 , @mitsureigen , @kame11a , @thirdblogsacharm , @sarah22447 , @blueberryhitosh1 , @written1nthest4rs , @huicitawrites

TW in general: Yandere behaviour, creepy and still puppet, dubious intentions and relationship, still in WIP more warnings may occure in time, also I am running out of pictures of P he looks the same in every pic (but prettily so) and so im gonna end up using the uh same ones prbly

[TW for this one specifically include: Demeaning uncle Geppetto, mentions of grief, signs of overworking mentioned, blood, wounds and crying, anxiety, puppet going aray]

[Also, I am gonna be like that and mention that I would not mind any comments or reblogs! This series is definitely gonna have short chapters and is currently building up settings but there's gonna be good ol yandere Pinocchio tailing after you like a puppy afterwards, no worries!]

The wrench bent on contact with the floor.

It was mere and old wood but the throw was aggressive enough to leave the tool useless. It was one of many. One he could easily snatch from the Workshop Union from.

Damn these halfwits.

He was not expecting a call from them. They were just as naive and cocky as the Workshop Union, and their glorious, genius breakthroughs.

With a grunt he picked up the tool before carelessly throwing it into a metal bucket. One on the far right corner and one far too familiar.

A heavy and frustrated sigh escaped him.

"Oh, son," Removing one glove, his fingers ran down his sweaty face, "It's always the same with them." Just as briskly as he sat down, Geppetto got up from the chair just as fast. His voice tired but still holding onto bitterness. "Stealing my time meant for you."

Brown eyes tiredly wandered up the motionless figure sitting on the blood-red armchair. The fabric untouched while surrounded by tools and oil, material that fell off shelves left on the floor. The pads were full and soft, so heavenly soft as it seemed - only the best for him even if he was not awake yet. Nevertheless, the sight irked him, from the unfinished touches of the skin up to the missing arm. It couldn't be any arm and so Geppetto had to wait and wait and wait for the material to be stocked again and again.

Progress was thriving at top speed but it didn't seem like that to him. All was too slow. Everybody was too tardy.

The flick of the light was fast but reluctant and as he looked outside, a scoff escaped him. Another long, long night but a dry one at that at least. Krat's cloudless nightsky the only relief he could feel.

Eyes mustered the nervous smile on your lips. Shoulders up to your ears and a little list in your hands - the man's hand absent-mindedly went to his mustache as he offered a smile to the lady before his eyes met yours again. With a nod, you were the next one in line.

The man rose his eyebrows and tilted his melon hat for a moment. You briefly scanned the list in your hands. "Baby blue fabric...made out of cotton, please?" "We certainly have that." Answered the man, "How long? Width and thickness?"

"Oh," You gave the measurements written on the paper and the clerk gestured you to follow. His other hand pointed on the hallway to the left. "Cherry." You turned your head as you tried to keep up, only to see a short puppet appear from the hallway, wearing the same melon hat as the man - only with a small ribbon at the side. Leading you to the back and taking out a roll of the cloth you requested, the man first showed it to you. 'Cherry' in the meantime rose its two hands, which consisted of a scissor and a measuring tape. Yet the clerk stopped it, before looking back to you. "I will let you know, young lady...100% cotton is expensive and we at Tailorshop Cherry never deliver anything other than superb quality."

He could see the hesitance in your face and took another roll of the wall. "60% cotton. Here, feel it." So you do, fingers gliding over the different fabric and as your eyes dart between the two rolls. The clerk eyed you with raised brows and it was almost like the puppet did, too.

You sucked in air. "...Perhaps 100% cotton would be better?" Making a face, the man sucked in air himself. "Can you even afford this, young lady?" He rolled the cloth up, "The measures you request for seem like that of an toddler. I've had...gentlemen pay the same sum to ask for their darlings hand."

"It's fine!"

"It is fine..." You repeated softer, "I am aware that this tailor is known for its quality...but I do know what I want." You pointed at the blue cloth. "This one would be just perfect."

The consequences were clear to you...but finances were the least of your worries. Your eyes throughouly stared at the roll, before looking up at the man and nodding your head firmly once more. Maybe you were too dead set on doing this and all of this might bite you later...it all depended on your uncle. Just musing about it made you deflate a bit. Perhaps it is the age, the stress, the work...but he has been more agitated since you last saw him - before your visit, before you moved here.

Or perhaps it was grief.

Eyes glanced to the side before looking back. "Well then, here you go." Feigning a smile, you took the package, one as big as your torso. You didn't like to think about it. "Cherry will stamp you a card. At the third purchase, 15% off!" It was too long ago. Or not, maybe even. "Thank you for purchasing from Tailorshop Cherry!" The puppet's hand brought out a stamp, punching a cherry-shaped hole on the pink card. It's voice softer and higher than that of the baker. You smiled and bowed before leaving.

Distracting oneself is easy. Either with your own life or with puppets.

A shaky gasp escaped you before the shrill echoes of inserructions neared. Your knees fell to the floor, the card long abandonded on the sullied ground as you clenched your hand to your chest with a high scream. The nearby customers congegrated around you but the salesman was quick to be the first one knelled at your side. Your ears felt about to burst - from the sounds of your crying to the panic of the people and the non-stop imploration of the man. The puppet seemed to speak, somewhere in the shop, for the first time since you entered.

"15% off!"

"15% off!"

"15% off!"

You cried and hissed as the shopkeep forcefully took your hand away from your grasp. Though he begged and begged to at least see, you were sure as hell from the pain that there was too much blood.

Somehow, somewhere feet scrambled and you heard sirens soon after. Before anyone could barge through the door, the man held you by the shoulders as he and others tried to stop the bleeding - begging and begging to not utter the name Tailorshop Cherry.

The sound of stomping in the air as well as revolted murmurs resounded still.

"15% off!"

The stitches and bandages were done with. A woman offered you a handkerchief to dry your tears. Though it was all awfully sweet, the mention of having been lucky that the puppet's clutches did not move any closer to your bone was one you immediately tried to force out of your head.

The card was left there on the shopfloor, its cherry pink color tainted red.

Jumping, you halted before your feet stepped on another pair. The door threw itself shut harsher and louder than anticipated and trying to save face, you quickly stepped to the side. Geppetto continued where he was left off - putting on his coat.

He glimpsed at you from the side, back hunched as he let one arm crawl into the sleeve as he did the other. You bit your lip and avoided his gaze before taking a step back. The wind picked up by the time you came back to the workshop and howled against the door. It creaked slightly.

The older man reached for his hat, "And where were you, young lady?" Finally he fully turned to you, though his eyes were still narrowed. "Out." You quickly but meekly let out and played with a loose wrapping end of the package. "As I told you, Uncle."

"I wasn't aware you'd be out this long." He looked for an umbrella, just in case, but kept his tone flat while speaking. "I don't like it when you are out for that long. Especially as such a young girl as yourself."

"I," You licked your lips after the small stutter, "I wanted to get back by dinner." "Dinner." Geppetto sighed, "Oh. Right, dinner." His hectic movements halted; before he began to button up his coat calmly. Eyes scanned the hallway and turned to you. "Be a dear and order food. Sandwiches or, or pasta. No, actually get something that can be eaten cold." You took a step closer, "Won't you have a bite before you leave? It's late and I am sure you're hungry. Besides, the weather's getting awful."

"The better it is that I leave now." Taking a small, old umbrella he finally found, Geppetto opened the door and took a step outside - but not before looking at you. "Order some food, dear, I'll be sure to enjoy it after I come back. And..." Brown eyes narrowed as he slightly leaned closer. The man scrunched up his nose.

"What happened to you, (Name)?" His eyes flickered to your limp hand. You mimicked his movements but tried to hide the bandaged hand under the parcel anyway.

"...Uncle, today afternoon..."

"Ah, you are fine though now, aren't you?" Geppetto failed to see the frown on your face the moment he mentioned the injury. Instead, he patted his collar down. "We'll talk about this later but this is what happens to children staying out after dark. You don't see how you get hurt."

Again, you tried to gather courage to speak your mind, just a word, a mere objection to his ridicilous and childish assumptions-

"...Go to bed early, (Name). You already have a few dark circles under your eyes, unbecoming of a young lady."

The door was shut close. A strong gale blew into the workshop briefly, leaving a shudder down your spine.

The frown stayed on your face. Still, the parcel had to be stored into your room sooner or later, and it was best done sooner judging from your uncle's mood. Adjusting your grip, as it started to slip out of your clutch, you slowly went up the stairs while having a hard time taking your eyes off the door.

Eyes stayed trained on the needle and the fabric, as well as your fingers, as the sewing machine diligently worked away. Although you held both machinery and fabric rather awkwardly with the side of your hand, the sure progress melted your sadness away, bit by bit.

Your wallet may have not suffered today for you got the fabric graciously for free, but your limb surely did.

The puppet did not really puncture your thumb, the emergency responder said. Still, the injury was deep enough to be treated with stitches and bandages...and a few painkillers, possibly. It kept you on wiping your tears.

The mechanical cadence would stop as you shift and lay the fabric in different directions, cut off unneeded material while avoiding to accidentally stab out your own eyes with the scissor whenever you rubbed them. The experience today was scary enough but despite it, you did not want to stop now.

Forcing yourself to take one more sip of your drink, you cleared your throat. Eyelids feeling heavier.

A puppet wasn't supposed to do that.

No puppet was ever meant to harm another, human or mechanical fellow alike. Even if it was a mere accident - this 'Cherry' should have sensed your flesh being too close to its brackets and it not having targeted the card correctly.

On top of that, echoing its master's words like a madman if you recalled right.

Uncle Geppetto had to know. Even if he would still be too busy to listen, you'd have to let him know.

"...I know you..."

You frowned as the machine begun again. Your voice barely reached the same volume as this old thing...neither did your sniffles.

"...I don't feeling like singing that one." Mumbles reaching no one but yourself. Once again, you sniffled and cleared your throat, focusing on the task at hand.

"...When you wish upon a star..."

Lone words entered the lone room. Sitting up straighter made you feel more focused, more awake. Here, in the moment and aware that this trivial task meant change for you.

"...Makes no difference who you are..."

The machine continued flawlessly despite its age. You even found yourself singing while it conducted its own cadence, no matter if both tunes melodically weaved in together or not.

It was about the feeling. About the action.

It was about being heard even if your only audience was yourself.

Yet it was not. It never was.

"...Anything your heart desires..."

Behind the many walls, down the turning and winding stairs and straight through the locked door, were sounds emitting and attempting to mimick your own.

The rattling was resounding from the underground and offering its own melody in hopes it will join and align with yours.

Though it sung in high and longing tunes when picking up the sound of your sniffles.

Naive, little thing that you were, you did not hear it over your own whimsical fantasies.

"...Will come to you..."

[kitthepurplepotato]

Chapter 18 - What’s on Izuku’s mind?

Summary: Izuku’s friends freak out over his weird behavior. When the boys go after him, Izuku’s secret gets revealed.

Warnings: Swear words, suggestive thoughts, quite a lot of talk about condoms. 😂 16+ for safety.

First Chapter Master List

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

“I’m quite sure you don’t need 15 protein shake powders for 5 days, Y/N.” Katsuki appears behind you with an incredulous look on his face. You were so deep in your thoughts you somehow put the whole shelf into your cart while you only need one. Great. “What’s strong, Sweets?”

Wow, that name sounds absolutely wrong from his mouth but you decide not to comment on that. He didn’t mean any harm with it. He never does.

“I said something in the plane that made him sad. But then he looked okay, but…” You mumble, trying your best not to cry in the middle of the grocery store. Katsuki sighs.

“But you are scared he was faking it and he’s crying in a corner right now.” Katsuki finishes your sentence. You turn around to look at him properly, and for your surprise, he looks just as concerned as you. “My fucking argument with the bird boy didn’t help either, so don’t worry, it’s not just your fault.”

“That doesn’t make me feel less stressed, Katsuki.” You retort with a sharp gaze.

“I know, but I also don’t want you to think everything is your fault. Because it’s not.” Katsuki bites his bottom lip with a frown on his face.

“Is this about Izuku?” Rody decides to join the conversation, his voice mild and careful.

He’s really trying, bless him.

“He’s been acting weird and left to look around alone instead of being with us. Usually, when he feels… down… he does that. Runs away like an injured cat ready to die.” Katsuki takes a deep breath, also doing his best to not start another quarrel with the brown haired man.

You can’t believe how much these two love Izuku. The fact that they are trying this hard right now speaks more than thousands of words ever could. He’s so lucky to have them.

“I can send a message in the city group chat about him. There are no secrets in this place, they’ll find him in a few minutes.” Rody is about to type a message on his phone, but Katsuki takes it away from him.

“Do you want to freak the shit out of him birdface… I mean Rody?!”

“Okay, that was a stupid idea.” Rody admits sheepishly. “Maybe you should go after him? You are his best friend after all.”

Instead of answer, Katsuki just gives the guy his phone back and looks at you with a worried expression.

“Keep an eye on Ei for me, make sure he only gets what he can carry to the top of the mountain. He’s also on a diet. If you see chocolate, explode it.” You can’t help but giggle at that. Whoever said Katsuki is an aggressive person is an absolute idiot. He makes his way towards the exit and looks back with a sharp gaze. “The fuck are you waiting for, foreigner, come on.”

Rody looks so surprised his jaw is about to hit the floor and you are not far away from doing the same. Wow. Just wow.

“I’m… coming?” Rody is frozen in one place, not sure if it’s safe for him to step closer or if this is a prank and he’s about to die.

“Are you?” Katsuki teases and no one gets offended this time. Phew.

“I am!”

~•🥦•~

“So what’s the plan?” Rody mutters to Katsuki, while he trails after him like a lost puppy. Katsuki can’t help but roll his eyes.

“We don’t need a plan. We find him and ask him what’s wrong. If he doesn’t answer, you leave and I’ll torture him until he does.”

Fuck, Izuku has been Katsuki’s best friend - he has two best friends, shut the fuck up - for fucking decades but this new, emotional instability is freaking the shit out of him, to be absolutely honest. He would lie if he would say Izuku hasn’t been… like this before, because he was, around the time he broke up with that shitty ass bitch, but back then, it was easy to see the reasons why he was acting the way he was while right now, Katsuki is a little bit confused.

Izuku never wavered when it came to hero work. Every time he fell on his face, he stood up and tried again. Then if he fell again, even if there was blood trailing down his forehead, he picked himself up once again and tried over and over until he got it right. Hell, the guy broke every single fucking bone in his body daily, just to be able to get better at using his quirk. Then after the war, when they were both broken down and banned from doing hero work or going back to school, he still studied, he still did his best every single day, not even worried about what the future holds for them. He never gave up, he never even thought about giving up or about the dangers of the job, he always went head first into the task and grinded until he got what he wanted.

This Izuku… is new to him. This Izuku isn’t sure about his future anymore and that’s the part Katsuki is freaking out about. He doesn’t know this Izuku. Doesn’t know that to say to him, how to ignite that flame once again and hell, Katsuki isn’t even sure what the fuck would he do if he would be in Izuku’s place right now. Obviously, none of them are in the business for the ranks anymore, that game stopped being fun once they reached the top and realized how much responsibly the title comes with. But Katsuki can understand how heartbreaking it can be to loose something you worked so hard for in a blink of an eye. Izuku is probably in shock right now, trying his best to comprehend the situation and that’s why he’s acting so strangely. He probably lost countless hours of sleep to the worry he feels every day, the worry that with him out of the picture the world will crumble, that innocent people will die if he’s not there on the battlefield and even though he has no reason to feel responsible for something he can’t control, it still eats him alive from the inside unknowingly, because that’s how Izuku is - Instead of enjoying the free time and all the love he gets from the fans, from his friends, from his family and mostly, from his girlfriend, he can’t help but dwell on the what ifs. It’s stupid, really, but Katsuki can’t lie and say he wouldn’t do the same in this situation. Even the most hard-headed person would crumble under such pressure. Hell, he would be fairing much worse, he would have burned the whole world down out of spite in Deku’s place. That guy is so fucking strong, what the fuck.

“You are muttering like Izuku.” Rody smiles at him with a knowing look on his face.

“Fuck off, I still hate you.”

“Why?”

That question made Katsuki jump out of his skin. Because honestly, why?

“Why do YOU hate me?” Katsuki retorts instead, giving himself enough time to think about his own answer.

“I don’t hate you, Bakugou, but I also can’t just let the past go.” Rody mutters. “I know I wasn’t there but… Izuku told me about how you treated him in middle school. And before you yell at me, I know you’ve changed. But the way you talk about me, the way you treat me reminds me of those stories. Reminds me of your despicable old self and I want to smack you in the face for it.”

Katsuki only gawks at the man right next to him.

“You can’t just throw that into my face, man!” He laughs, absolutely gobsmacked. “Fair play bitch, but you know jack shit about me!”

“I know, sorry.” Rody laughs back, followed by a dramatic sigh.

“Don’t be fucking sorry, it makes sense. And to answer your question I hate you because you managed to be friends with Deku in one fucking day while I couldn’t fucking get myself to say a single nice word to him but secretly wanted to be friends again. I was fucking jealous of you, you dick. You and your fucking sad background story and your cute fucking pink bird. Fuck you.”

Rody almost trips over a stone from how much he’s laughing right now. “Stop fucking laughing! It’s not funny! You traumatized me! Hugging him and shit like you knew each other for fucking ages!” He retorts but he can’t hide the smile on his face.

Katsuki sees a green blob through the window, in one of the small stores in this area. By the look of it, Izuku is hyperfocused on a box of…

“Are you fucking kidding’ me?” Katsuki mutters, his face full of incredulity.

“What… oh my god…”

It takes the two men several minutes before they can stop laughing. Then they enter the store.

~•🥦•~

“Welcome!” A lovely voice greets the green haired hero when he opens the door to the tiny cosmetic shop down the road.

Izuku is on a mission. Probably on the most important mission in his whole life and he’s been through a lot of shit.

If he messes this up, everything is over. He’s been waiting for this moment for so long and he’s at his limits; if he can’t have this one thing as soon as possible, the whole world will crumble. He’s been hyper fixating on this thing for ages. His therapist told him several times to just do it, it’s not something he’s not capable of in this state, so he has to let his ridiculously high expectations go and just let it happen naturally. He needs to stop thinking about it and just… do it. But he can’t just do it, can he? He needs to think about safety. Protection. He needs to make sure his Sweet Pea doesn’t hate this new side of him. He needs to make sure he has everything to be able to finish this mission successfully.

Hence why he entered this store. A cosmetic store/pharmacy.

Today, Izuku will purchase some… condoms.

He makes a beeline towards the sexual health isle. Then he freezes.

There are so many choices. Too many. He doesn’t understand why do people need so many. He doesn’t mean to brag but he never had to have a ribbed condom to make the other feel great. Isn’t sex all about finding out what your partner likes? What’s the point if you don’t put any work in it? It’s Izuku’s favorite part! The analyzing! Even though he feels weirdly reluctant about penetration when it comes to his sweet pea, to be absolutely honest. She’s so pure, so kind, so lovely. Izuku just want to please her without doing any damage. Not like having sex is damaging but… ahh, it’s hard to explain.

“Hello, sir, are you looking for something specific today?” The lovely customer adviser asks and that’s all Izuku needs to start muttering out all his thoughts.

“I’m here to buy some condoms but I haven’t used one in a while and there are so many options and I don’t really understand the need to have so many and I’m also terrified I’ll buy the wrong one and I’m not sure what’s trendy or what not or if it even matters, but what if it does and I choose the wrong one and what if she has one she prefers and I didn’t even ask? I should have brought her over but I wanted it to be a surprise and I didn’t want her to feel like she needs to uhm… you know… so I just wanted to have it around, just in case… I think I’m freaking out.”

Izuku knows he should be offended for being laughed at by the customer adviser but she looks so entertained he can’t tell her off for it. As we all know, Izuku likes to please.

“Well, I definitely didn’t think when I woke up today that I’ll be helping Japan’s number one hero choosing condoms but I’m glad I didn’t call in sick today.” Izuku feels mortified. He really didn’t think about his fame when he started babbling about his sexual life. He wants the earth to swallow him whole or just run out of the store but he really needs to buy at least one box today, otherwise he’ll be trapped in the mountains with the girl of his dreams for 5 days, surrounded by things that will definitely remind him of… well… that… and he can’t do that anymore.

“Well, do you know if she’s allergic to latex?”

Izuku freaks out once again.

“No, I don’t, oh my god, what do I do now?!”

“Calm down, we have latex free options so maybe take on of those just in case, this brand here is the most loved one.” The lady pops the box into his basket before he can freak out over it. “Now if it comes to the trends… I would go for something simple as you don’t know what your lady prefers yet. This one here is our bestseller, it has a texture that feels like skin, so it feels more natural. We have normal and extra large I’ll leave you to decide which one you want to go with.”

Izuku feels too awkward to actually choose so he just pops both versions into his basket.

Here’s the thing… he has no idea if it’s something that came with his inherited quirk or not but when he hit his growth spurt… his third leg grew as well. He only had one girlfriend and he tries to forget everything about her but he clearly remembers her saying that his size is uhm… respectable. He’s not sure what that exactly means so… yeah. He’s quite sure he used normal sized condoms before and while they are a little bit uncomfortable, it was okay. But maybe he just needs to try a different size.

Okay, Izuku. Focus.

“Do I need… uhm… lube?” Izuku mutters our loudly and for his surprise he doesn’t get laughed at this time; the lady looks at him, her eyes moving from his face to his legs and she… gulps. Izuku’s whole face becomes as red as a fresh strawberry from his garden.

“I don’t think so, but buy one just in case.” The lady blushes and stares out of the window, probably mortified by her own reaction.

“Why are they so many options.” Izuku whimpers as he looks at the massive selection. There are so many flavors and so many brands and… why do you even need them to be flavored…

Izuku, for the love of god, do not think about it. Do not go there. You know why they are flavored.

“I’ll… get the one that says natural. I think.” Izuku pops the lube into his basket with a blush on his face and that’s when the door opens.

“You motherfucker! We thought you are depressed!” Katsuki yells loudly, making the lady jump.

“Ahh, hi Catherine! I hope he didn’t say anything weird to you!” Rody puts his palm on the customer advisor’s shoulder.

“No, he just told me how much he loves his girlfriend, that’s all.” The lady winks and Izuku wants to disappear once again.

“Kacchan, are these okay?” Izuku shows his basket to his best friend, probably looking like a kid showing off his freshly caught beetles.

“How many times do you want to fornicate a day, Deku?” Kacchan asks the million dollar question as he looks at the three boxes in his basket.

“They are different, Kacchan. I couldn’t pick.”

“Well, first of all…” Kacchan takes the normal sized box out of his basket and puts it back on the shelf. “Don’t look at me like that, we’ve changed in front of each other quite a few times you know. I’m not saying the other won’t fit but this will be more comfortable.”

“Thank you, Kacchan!” Izuku stares at his best friend with eyes full of wonder. Kacchan blushes.

“Let’s go fucker, your girlfriend is fucking worried. Also, buy something else so you can say that’s what you wondered off for, if you don’t want to tell her about the condoms.”

“You are a genius!”

Katsuki only rolls his eyes at that.

Izuku gets Sweet Pea’s favorite perfume without even thinking about it; she’s been out of it for several days now but she said it’s too expensive for her budget, so needless to say, Izuku buys three of them. He also gets some chocolate from the counter and a cute pin with the Island’s name for everyone. He puts the condoms into the secret compartment of his backpack while he puts the rest on the top.

“Your secret is safe, buddy!” Rody winks as they make their way out of the store. Izuku thanks the lady once again for all her help and she asks for a selfie. Izuku complies.

“Yeah, don’t worry, birdface and I will make sure no one bothers you two when you are in your cabin.” Katsuki grins as he pulls Izuku closer by putting his arm around his shoulders.

“Yup. We are friends now.” Rody does the same from the other side and Izuku is sure they look like three drunken blokes right now but he’s so happy he doesn’t even bother about how they look.

“We are fucking not.” Katsuki grumbles, but he doesn’t say a single word when Pino sits on his shoulder, and that says a lot.

Life is great. Life is amazing. He doesn’t remember the last time he’s been so happy and nothing can fuck up his perfect mood, not even the dread he feels when he thinks about the future because right now, in this moment, he is the happiest nerd in the whole world.

~•🥦•~

“Izu!” You jump into your boyfriend’s arms just as he comes into your view. Honestly, this man will be the death of you one day. “Are you okay?!”

“Sweets, I just wanted to buy something. I’m sorry if it came off like I’m running away, trust me, all I want is to be with you and my friends. I’m so excited to go up, I’ve been sitting on my bum for so long, I can’t wait to get in shape here.” Izuku giggles and you feel a sudden urge to touch his bum to make sure it’s still in shape… khm. Sorry. Nevermind.

“Yeah, Japan can’t loose it’s number one juicy ass. That would be more devastating than a world war in this day and age.” Rody adds cheekily and both of your faces blush.

“Rody, please…” Izuku mutters, clearly uncomfortable with the sudden attention.

“Okay, can you guys stop talking about my boyfriend’s ass? That ass is mine. So back off!”

You can’t believe you said that, but you felt like it would make the group laugh, so… yeah.

What you did not expect was Izuku looking at you with half lidded eyes, clearly enjoying YOUR attention; he creeps closer, his lips right by the cusps of your ear as he whispers. “I didn’t realize you like it this much.” And hell if it doesn’t go straight to your… well… uhm. There.

“Izuku. For the love of god. Behave yourself.”

“I’m so sorry, I…” Izuku starts to stutter as he comes back to his senses. “Uhm, I don’t know why I did that, I just…”

“Shut up and starts going up that hill.” You spank that famous ass three times to make him move. Izuku’s facial expression changes between “I’ll devour you right here right now” and “omg everyone is watching me I’m scared” as he leads the way towards the cabins. It’s extremely hilarious.

“Wow, that tension was something else.” Tamaki gossips with Mirio who only laughs at the comment.

“I mean, there is something extremely romantic about making love in a cabin.” Mirio admits with a sigh.

“Great, I guess this is what you get for coming to a trip as the only single person in the group.” Kyouka moans as she follows the crowd.

“You can hang out in our cabin, Kyouka!” Kaminari perks up right away, probably excited to have someone to talk to because Shinsou is clearly not in the mood for a friendly banter right now, god knows why.

“We are all going to have a grill party this evening in OUR cabin, so keep it on your pants for now.” Katsuki declares. “Ei got all the meat possible so let’s go up because it’s fucking heavy.”

“I’ve got the booze!” Kirishima grins. “It’s also heavy!” He says but he doesn’t look bothered by it at all.

“Come on guys, if I’m not the last one up there, you all suck!” Izuku yells from the top of his lungs with a massive smirk on his face. Needless to say that comment makes the whole gang perk up.

“Oh boy, I’ll be the first!” Kaminari yells back, already running ahead of the team.

“Oi, not on my watch, Pikachu!” Katsuki is the next one to start sprinting then everyone starts running like maniacs except Kyouka, who decides to stay with you, walking in a normal pace.

“He looks excited.” Kyouka smiles at you as he looks at Izuku running with Katsuki, borrowing some help from black whip when the “road” is too steep.

“I really hope he enjoys himself.” You say dreamily and Kyouka gives you a shit eating grin.

“Not unless he can see you, so move your legs, bitch, we need to catch up!” She pulls you forward aggressively, almost making you fall.

“Hey!” You laugh, but you start running anyway; with so many heroes around, you are quite sure someone will catch you if you fall.

… Next Chapter!

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Potato ramble:

- If you read the last chapter of my Kirishima fic you already now but if not… I’m not sure if I’ll be able to post as frequently or at all. I’m going through a tough time and it greatly affects my writing, especially this story, to be honest, so if I don’t post for a while, I’m sorry. I don’t really want to get into details for now as it would make it way too real and right now I’m trying to just ignore it and keep going, but… if it escalates, I’ll let you know. Please be patient with me. I’m doing my best. Also, if you see me post other stuff but not this one it’s probably because I have a bunch of chapters already written for everything but this one. I’m not neglecting this story I’m just… done.

- Now let’s talk about this chapter and leave the angst behind 😂

- I absolutely love this new unhinged version of Deku. He’s slowly starting to be himself and I’m so proud of him I want to cry. He’s not shy anymore, he knows what he wants and he also knows he’s loved for who he is and not for the facade he usually shows to the people around him and damn, that’s a character development!

- I hope you laughed when you realized what Izuku’s problem was. I definitely laughed my ass of while writing this chapter, especially when I was writing the beginning with the drama while knowing what the real “problem” is 😂

- Oh, also! You can support me with a “coffee” if you would like! It won’t help my mental issues but it helps me pay rent and buy more figurines for comfort so yeah. I’m just throwing this out there just in case. 😂

- Tell me your thoughts! Send me a comment! Distract me! Please and thank you! 😂

TL:

@garfieldthomas @porusuniverse @stickygumchewer @sixxze @mily-moo @aei-sedai-moiraine @aymasakusa @katsuari @kenzie-deadly @shiviwrites07 @lukerycyja-reblogs @cloroxisadelectabletreat @coffeent @kisskissshutmydoor @bobcar1 @yazminetrahan @cringefan @ronimacaroni77 @themultifandomgirl @dangerousluv1 @emperatris-rinaka @shotos-angelic-whore @angelsdemonsmonsters @norvacaine @rei165 @unofficialmuilover @yao-ai @happydragonfrog @eeerreehhh @vinivave

[lukall705]

Young love chapter 3

https://www.tumblr.com/lukall705/739528729734299648/young-love-chapter-1?source=share Chapter one

https://www.tumblr.com/lukall705/740076676409622529/young-love-chapter-2?source=share chapter two

TW? idk

______________________________________________________________

Sigma POV:

Me and Y/N are walking to the shopping center near our campus. "so what your favorite colour?" i ask them "oh its F/C and F/C" they say and smile at me "whats your favorite colour?" they ask me. "my favorite colour is purple" i say. "i have to say i really like your outfit" i say and they blush a bit "o-oh th-thank you.. i'm not used to people complementing my outfits" they say and look a bit embarrassed. "sorry if i start stuttering, it happens when i'm nervous" they laugh awkwardly. "oh no its okay, i also stutter sometimes when i'm nervous" i try to reassure them. 

We both keep chatting until we get to the mall "Lets go to hot topic!" Y/N says happily "Hot topic? you don't seem like someone who would shop there?" i say and it seems like Y/N wants to say something but doesn't. I wonder what they were gonna say.

As we walk in is see Y/N going over to some pretty revealing clothes. "y-you wear this type of clothes..? a-aren't they a bit.. revealing..?" i ask them "i'd rather be slut then basic" they say while pulling out a shirt that says 'cum slut'. "oh.." i chuckle nervelessly. "should i get this one?" they ask "..i mean if you want to.." "oh! I've been looking for a shirt like this" Y/N says and shows me a shirt with hand prints on the chest "there's matching pants for it too!" they say. 'we've been friends for like an hour and they are already this comfortable around me?' i think 'well at least they are having fun, right? thats the only thing that maters' 

"also i forgot to ask but what country are you from?" i ask them. They look at me before answering "Finland, i'm Finnish"(or whatever country your from) They keep looking at stuff in the store. 

A few hours later: (still sigma's POV)

As we both walk up the stairs Y/N starts talking "I'm sorry you have to carry my stuff" They look embarrassed "it's really no problem, i'm glad i could help" i smile at them while they open the door to their dorm.

"take off your shoes please" they say and i take of my shoes "my room is right over there" they point at a door. 

"oh, Y/N you're back" i hear a voice say. I look over to the couch and see Dazai and Chuuya cuddling while watching some movie. Y/N just ignores them both and walks over to their room. "hey Sigma!" Dazai waves to me and i wave back awkwardly.  

"Just put the bags over there" Y/N points to a corner in their room. "wow, your room looks nice" i say and look around "thanks" they say. I spot some drawings on their desk "did you make these yourself? they look really nice" "oh, yeah i did and thanks" they smile "your quite good at drawing clothes, you know. you could become a clothing designer one day" as i say this is see Y/N's smile get wider. 

Y/N pulls out a picture book from a backpack. "hm? whats that?" i ask them "its a photo book, sometimes i do small modeling shoots for fun" they say and give me the book "wanna see?" they ask "yeah" i say and open the book.

"i'll go change while you look through it" Y/N says and goes into the bathroom. 'wow these look really nice' i say while looking through the pages. suddenly some photos catch my eye. its pictures of Y/N with different colored hand prints all over their body.  'oh' i think.

Y/N's POV:(TW?)

I'm standing in front of my bathroom mirror looking at my arms with the words 'i'm so disgusting' repeating over and over in my mind. 'why am i this disgusting?' 'its no wonder my past boyfriends left me' 'i fucking hate myself' 'i should just die' 'i bet Sigma is just pretending to be my friend so he can leave like everyone else did' 'i'm so fucking fa-' my thoughts are interrupted by a knock on my bathroom door. 

"are you okay in there Y/N?" Sigma asks from outside "you've been in there for 15 minutes" he adds '15 minutes?' "i'm fine! i'm coming out in a second" i say and quickly wrap bandages that are the same colour as my skin around my arms to hide the scars. 

I see Sigma looking at the bandages but doesn't say anything about them. "I need to go back to my dorm now, its getting kinda late and i don't want Nikolai to lock me out again" Sigma says and scratches the back of his head. "oh thats fine" i smile and i walk him to the door.

"see you in class tomorrow" i say "yeah" he smiles and i hug him. "bye" he says as he walks out the door and runs over to his door.

When i turn around i almost scream as i see Dazai and Chuuya standing right behind me. 'HOLY SHIT' i think as they both stare at me. "w-what are you two doing?" i ask nervously. "Is he your boyfriend?" Chuuya asks and looks at me suspiciously "what!? No! we're just friends!" i say "yeah, sureee. just friends" Dazai says in teasing voice "we're not dating!" "okay okay, clam down" Dazai says.  

"also, whats with the bandages?" Chuuyas asks me and i freeze up 'fuck' "none of your business!" I yell and they both look shocked that i yelled at them. "sorry" "its okay, i shouldn't have asked" Chuuyas says. 

all three of us stand there in awkward silence. "so.. you wanna watch a movie or something with us?" Dazai asks "yeah sure" i say wanting this awkward silence to just end already. The three of us make our way over to the couch and i sit in the corner of the couch a bit away from them. "what should we watch?" Chuuya asks "a horror movie" i say "Yeah, but what movie" He says. "Terrifier " I smirk "okay" Chuuya says while putting on the Movie and getting comfortable under a blanket with Dazai.

"I would love to be tied up like that by Chuuya~" Dazai says as we get to the scene where Art tied a naked woman upside down. "i think you should watch the whole scene before saying something like that" i say while drinking water "what do you me-" i watch as the colour drains from Dazai's and Chuuya's face when Art starts to cut the woman's body in half from her crotch.

"Art is so baby girl! he did nothing wrong! hes just a silly clown!" i say after the movie is done "WHAT!? HE JUST KILLED 9 PEOPLE!? WHAT DO YOU MEAN "HES SO BABY GIRL"!? ARE YOU CRAZY!?" Chuuya looks at me like i just killed someone. "Crazy!? no! i just think Art is hot! hes so dreamy!" i say "You're even worse then Dazai!" Chuuya yells "huh?! what do you mean by that?!" I yell in a surprised voice. 

"I MEAN THAT YOU ARE MORE OF A DISGUSTING FREAK THEN DAZAI"

When i heard his words i completely freeze up 'they think i'm a freak?' the words hurt me more then i let show. the words ring in my ears 'i'm a freak' 'I'M A FREAK!?' it feels like time stopped and i have no idea how long i sat there not saying anything 'do they not like me!? do they not wanna be my friends anymore!?' its all my fault' 'why am i like this!?' 'i hate myself' my thoughts are interrupted by Chuuya.

"Are you okay Y/N..? you look a bit pale.." he says and both him and Dazai look at me worriedly. Chuuya waves his hand in front of my face "hello? you've been sitting there for 15 minutes, are you okay?" he asks worriedly "uh.. yeah, i just don't feel well, i'll go to bed.." i say and get up from the couch. Dazai and Chuuya both look at each other "i think you might have hurt their feelings.." i hear Dazai say to Chuuya while i'm getting myself some water. 'did he really mean what he said..?' i think before going to my room.

After getting ready for bed i check the time. '00:26am'. i see Sigma sent me a message 'Goodnight Y/N, i think Nikolai and Fyodor are gonna stay up again so i hope they don't keep you up and if they do just tell me and i'll them to be more quiet:)' i smile a bit while reading it. 'goodnight' i send back and put my phone on my bedside table. 

A few hours later i wake up and check the time on my phone '4:23am'. i'm feeling like absolute shit right now, it feels like there are hundreds of thoughts running through my head right now. And for some reason they are all of my negative thoughts. i feel tears start to form in my eyes 

'why am i so useless?' 

I think to myself.

'Why can't i control how i feel? why are my emotions such a pain in the ass?' i start to silently cry into my pillow hoping that i don't wake up Chuuya and Dazai who are sleeping in the room next to me. 'What's the point of going on if everyone thinks i'm a freak?' my tears start to stain the pillow under me.

~(Flashback)~

"You're just a stupid freak!" My mother says. "You're a good for nothing child!" My mom yells again "you should just die for all care!"  i had just tolled my mom about my problems. the disgusting things i feel. I wanna cry right now but no tears are coming out.. i just feel ..empty.. i feel nothing as my mom yells at me for how much of a freak and how disgusting i am. 

~(end of flashback)~

"i think i need to go out and get some fresh air.." i say to myself while getting up from my bed and putting on some clothes. 

I walk through the dorm as quietly as i can so i don't wake up Dazai and Chuuya. i put on my shoes and walk out into the hallway. I see that its still a bit dark out side through the window at the end of the hallway. 

As i walk up a set of stairs to the roof of the building i start thinking about my life. 'I don't see any point in living anymore, everyone in my life thinks i'm a freak' i think.

When i open the door to the roof i feel a cold breeze hit my face. It feel quite refreshing actually. i walk over to the fance near the edge of the building and climb over it. 'i think this is where i'll end this life of mine..'

I pick up my phone and bring it to my ear. "..hello..?" i hear Sigma's tired voice say on the other end of the phone. "..Are Nikolai and Fyodor making to much noise? i can go tell them to quiet dow-" "no need to" "..huh..? why..?" "they aren't the thing keeping me up" "..okay.:" i hear Sigma yawn "..where are you right now Y/N..? i can hear the wind" "i'm sitting on my bed with window open" i lie "oh okay.." i can hear that hes really sleepy.

"so.. why did you call me..?" he asks "i just wanted to say that i'm not feeling to well so i might not make it to school tomorrow" i lie again "..oh okay.." "goodnight Sigma" "Goodnight Y/N.."  As i hang up the phone i feel rain drops hit my face, "do i even want this..?" i ask myself as i close my eyes preparing to fall.

"Don't do it" I hear a deep voice say from behind me. I turn around and see a man in his late fourties to early fifties with white long hair standing under an umbrella. "but what's the point of going on..?" i say in a broken voice "There's nothing left for me to live for..." i feel tears start to form in my eyes again.

"it may feel like that right now, but it does get better. this isn't the right choice" he says while looking me in the eyes. "..why should i believe that..?" tears start to run down my cheeks "..when everyone sees me as a freak.." i start remembering all the times my mother called me a disgusting freak. "whats your name?" he asks "..huh..? its Y/N.." i say "its nice to meet you Y/N, my name is Fukuzawa" the man says.

"Now tell me Y/N, are you sure you want to do this or is it because you feel like you deserve this?" he asks and i stay quiet. i have no idea how to answer him, i don't even really know myself.

'is this really what i want?' i think as my tears blur my vision.

I feel the rain soaking my clothes and hair as i cry. And after a few minutes i climb back over the fence. I see Fukuzawa opening his arms and i hug him. its the first time in forever i feel comforted by someone.  Fukuzawa rubs my back as i cry and suddenly i'm a 6 year old crying into my mothers chest, but this time i'm actually getting comforted and not yelled at. 

Fukuzawa stays still until i'm done crying, he stands there listening to me vent about my problems not saying a word. 

"..Please don't tell anyone about this.." i say while whipping my tears away. "i won't, now i think you should go back to your dorm and get some rest, you have school tomorrow" he says and pets my head.

We both walk back down the stairs in silences until i ask "how did you know i was up there..?" i look at him waiting for an answer. "i happened to be walking to the roof to enjoy some fresh air and saw you" he answers. "oh.." 

When i get to my dorm i open the door "goodnight Mr. Fukuzawa.." i say and he nods. i close the door when i see him starting to walk away. I quietly walk back to my room hoping Dazai and Chuuya aren't awake.

When i sit down on my bed i check the time '4:56am' i yawn as i put my phone down on my bedside table again and lay down in bed.(after taking of your wet clothes ofc)

As i lay there i start to think about what would have happened if Fukuzawa didn't stop me. Would i be dead? would be suffering in pain just wanting to die? would i have changed my mind? all of these thoughts are flooding my mind until i eventually fall asleep. 

The next morning i wake up with a pretty bad headache and groan when i get up from the bed "jeez.. i don't feel like going to school today at all.." i say while going into the bathroom to brush my teeth.

After brushing my teeth i put on my uniform.

 

(You can chose which ever one you like. also ik that most colleges in japan don't have uniforms but just pretend this college has them)

As i look at myself in the mirror i see my chubby belly '....' its one of the things i hate about myself but can't get rid of no mater how much starve myself.

I pick up my bag and walk out of my room and see Chuuya and Dazai standing in the kitchen talking about something. I walk over to the coffee machine to make coffee and notice that Chuuya has a guilty look on his face. "Good morning Y/N!" Dazai says in a happy voice "hm.." i hum in response as i drink my coffee hoping it would keep me awake. 

"Did you sleep well last night?" he asks and i nod "oh yeah, also the principal asked me to give you this, its your class schedule" he says while handing me a piece of paper "thanks" i say while looking over it 'Okay so i have P.E first then math, then social studies, then lunch, then English, then music, then science' 

"P.E at like 7:30 in the morning on a Monday?" i look at them both 'thats gonna be hell and i only got like 3 hours of sleep' "P.E is your first class? You must be really unlucky, Mr. Fukuchi makes all of his students run like 23 miles if you have him in your first class" Chuuya says 'yay how lucky i am' i have a bitter look on my face. 

"whats your first classes?" i ask them "we both have social studies as our first class" Chuuya says 'Lucky motherfuckers' i check the time on my phone and see its 7:24 am "i think we should get going its already 7:24" i say and they nod.

As the three of us run so we won't be late for class i suddenly remember something "wait! i don't know where the P.E area is!" i yell "you have to go to the back of the school to the changing rooms!" Chuuya yells to me as he and Dazai run into another hallway to get to class.

When i get to the back of the school i start panting and see the other students already ready for P.E "You're late" i here a man say "Sorry! its my first day here! i had no idea where i had to go!" i look up at him and i see him glaring me down. i gulp

"Fine since its your first day i'll let it slide" he says while playing with his mustache "huh" i look dumbfounded "Now go change into your P.E clothes before i change my mind" he says "Yes sir!" i say and run into the changing rooms. "and the rest of you start running!" he yells at the other students. 

"How the hell does this even count as shorts?! these are basically panties!?" i say to myself as i walk out of the changing rooms. (TW? for what comes next)

When i start running i feel some people looking at me. When i look around me i see a lot of other girls who are much skinnier then me looking and pointing at me while giggling. 'why do i have to be so fat..?' i hate it here this was supposed to be a new start for me but its almost just like the life i had back home. i feel like i want to cry. 

"Jeez, just let them be alone! what did they do to you?" i hear a young woman's voice say. i look at where the voice is coming from and i see a pretty woman with short black hair and a butterfly clip in it.  

"oh, wait i get it! you guys are jealous that they look better then you!" She says and smirks at them "What!? no!" one of the girls say and look pissed "then what is it?" the black haired woman says "its.. its umm.." the girl can't give good reason as to why they back talked me and leaves with her friends.

"are you alright?" the black hair woman asks me "y-yeah.." i smile at her "Yasano" she says "Y/N" i say back and she shakes my hand.

The rest of P.E is spent by me and Yasano doing the run and chatting.

After i come out of the changing room after changing back into my uniform, i start to look for my math class. while walking i accidentally bump into someone "ah, sorry!" i say to them. The person i bumped into just glares at me not saying a single word "s-sorry.." i say in an embarrassed voice. i quickly rush away from embarrassment. i keep running in the hallway until i see a  familiar face "Sigma!" i yell and he turns around. (i almost had a fucking stroke trying to write familiar) 

"Y/N! so you did make it to school, i was worried since you didn't answer my massages" he smiles at me "oh, i think i was just feeling like shit because of the lack of sleep last night" i lie. "also do you know where room xoxo is?" i ask him "Oh i was just about to head over there right now since i also have math class" he says and we start walking.

After math, me and Sigma go to the cafeteria to eat lunch. after getting our food we go to sit down at a table with Nikolai and Fyodor.

(This is the lunch:3) "This looks so good!" i say. "I've been waiting for this the whole day!" i say. While i start to eat i see Nikolai is nagging Fyodor again. "No Nikolai, we can't get a 3rd rat" he says in his heavy Russian accent. "oh yeah, i never got to ask, but are you Russian?" i ask Fyodor "sorry if that sound stupid or rude" "You are right, i am Russian" he says and gives me a gentle smile. 

Dazai POV: 

The both of us sit down at a table with Atsushi and Akutagawa after getting our food. While eating our food me and Chuuya see that Y/N is eating with Nikolai, Fyodor and Sigma, adn it looks like they are having a lot of fun. I see Chuuya glaring at them. I know how much he wants to say that hes sorry to Y/N but he doesn't have the balls to do it in front of other people. 

While watching them i see Y/N smiling and laughing, 'they look kinda cute while they are happy..' i think. i feel a bit annoyed that Y/N is hanging out with them and not us 'wait.. am.. am i jealous..?' Seeing Y/N so happy kinda makes me happy too.. 

I notice how angry Chuuya looks "hey, Chuuya~ what class do you have after this?~" i ask "Math why?" he looks at me a bit calmer now. "oh i was thinking~ maybe we skip class to, you know~" i say with a smirk and Chuuya blushes a bit. Chuuya sends me a message 'fine, but only because i have to relieve stress ' i smile and text back 'okay babe'

After lunch the both of us sneak away into a bathroom. I pin Chuuya to the bathroom wall as we make out "Fuck i love you so much..~" i whisper into his ear as i pull down his pants. i bend him over the sink "be a good boy and try to not make to much noise, okay?~" i whisper in his ear and he nods. "j-just start already.." he moans out. "fine~" i say as i pull down my pants. i slowly push my hard cock into his hole "a-ah~" Chuuya moans into his hand. "you.. you can move now..~" he pants out as i start thrusting. "ah~ D-dazai~ please faster~" Chuuya begs and i start moving faster. "Ah!~ Ah~" Chuuya moans as he grips the sink "what's wrong baby?~ is it to much for you?~" i say as i take his cock into my hands and start rubbing his sensitive tip "Ah!~ dazai~ please let me cum!~" Chuuya has tears in his eyes from the overestimation. i bite the back of his neck "not yet pretty boy~" i can feel myself getting closer to cumming. I put my hand over Chuuyas mouth and pull his head back by his hair as he whimpers "you wanna cum pretty boy?~" i tease him. "Mhm!~ Mhm!~" he nods with pretty tears falling from his eyes. 

"Cum then~" i whisper into his ear and flip him onto his back. "Come on baby~" i say as i thrust faster and pump his pretty cock. After a few seconds he cums all over his belly. "AH!~" Chuuya moans as he cums. i pull out of him and pump my cock until i cum on his belly to "ngh~" i groan as i cum. 

I kiss his tears away "you did so well.."

Y/N POV: 

When i get to my music class i only see one face i recognizance. 'thank god!' i think as i walk up to Nikolai. "I'm so happy that i at least know one person from this class" "Y/N! I'm so happy that one of my friends is in this class!" he says and hugs me tightly. 

While me and Nikolai hug i see Dazai and Chuuya walk into the room, and Chuuya's legs seem to be shaking a bit? 

I see Chuuya looking a bit annoyed when he sees Nikolai hugging me 'whats his deal?'

When the teacher comes in she start explaining that we have to dance a dance, and to get a partner.  "Y/N! be my partner!" Nikolai whines "i was just about to ask you to be mine.." i chuckle.

After school is over i walk back to my dorm. (i'm to lazy to write what happens for the rest of the school day so just use you imagination)

When i get back to the dorm i plop onto the couch "man.. this day was hell and its only the first day.." while laying on the couch thinking about what i should do i hear the door open. I see Chuuya and Dazai walk in.

I get up from the couch to get myself some water. after getting my water i try to go to my room but Dazai grabs my hand to stop me "..Y/N.. Chuuya has something to say to you.." he says. "okay.. go on.." i say and stand face to face with him.

We both stand there for a few minutes in silence while Chuuya avoids eye contact. "..Y/N i'm sorry for calling you disgusting freak.." he says while scratching the back of his head. 'for some reason it doesn't seem sincere..' i stand there for a while before speaking "i'll forgive you.." i say and look down. "i hope we can be friends.." he says. "yeah me too.." for some reason the though of us only being friends hurt me.. i don't know why tho.

______________________________________________________________

(i need some feedback, was the y/n to dramatic? was this to early for some angst? or was it just fine)

[rowiewritesstuff]

Yandere tfp Soundwave and shockwave?

Yandere Soundwave Fic:

TFP Yandere Shockwave X Reader

Shockwave doesn’t really feel emotions like everyone else. Yes, he has feelings like anger and pride- but he very rarely felt sad or sympathetic- and never the feeling of love.

When he saw you with the Autobots he just saw you as another annoyance- not someone he would grow to care for. 

When Soundwave took Ratchet, you were cradled in Ratchet’s arms. You were his assistant. You didn’t know much about science to start out with, but you were a mechanic. That helped you to be a good medic for basic repairs- eventually you learned a lot more under Ratchet’s care. You were very quick to learn and quickly surpassed him in knowledge (though he would never admit it).

Once on the ship, Ratchet agreed to help Megatron- on the terms you stayed with him the entire time. You were his assistant, and he needed you. 

Shockwave objected to having a small being getting in the way of their science, but Megatron told him it would only be temporary.

Shockwave was impressed when he discovered that you were proficient in Cybertronian sciences. This made him wonder about the brain capacity for humans. 

Soon enough, he started experiments on humans in a separate lab. He wanted to know all about you and your brain.

When the synthetic energon formula was almost completed, he went to Megatron to ask him a favor. 

“Lord Megatron,” he bowed. 

“What is it, Shockwave?” Megatron’s eyes never left the datapad he was reading through. 

“I would like to keep the human once the use for the autobot medic is no more.”

This made Megatron look up in interest. “Oh?”

Shockwave sucked up his pride to admit that you were better than him. “The human is… incredibly intelligent. They are also barely a threat as long as they are kept under a watchful eye. It would be a waste to simply dispose of them.”

Megatron couldn’t help but smirk. “I see. Well, as long as you prevent another ‘incident’ from happening again, I suppose you can keep it.”

Shockwave wouldn’t let another incident happen again. You had gotten out of the room somehow, and gotten into the dinner hall’s energon supply- which you proceeded to blow up. Three Vehicons were killed, and another seven injured. You were attempting to find a way out when you were cornered, so you tried to escape anyway you could. When they caught you, you weren’t punished out of a worry Ratchet would stop working.

When Ratchet grabbed you up in an attempt to escape, Megatron caught you both. Megatron snatched you up in his claws as he forced you both back into the lab. You were dropped onto a table when Ratchet grabbed you up.

Knockout was there, and he clicked his glossa at you. “Nice try~” he mocked, holding the correct Synthetic Energon recipe.

Shockwave pulled a sample out of a machine. “Spectral analysis confirms- that the synthetic energon is stable.” He held the glass up to Megatron. “The formula is now complete.” 

You whispered to Ratchet while they talked. “Ratch, maybe we can try to escape again.” The old bot merely shook his head when Megatron turned to us.

“Ahh, a pity you won’t live long enough to witness the fruits of your labor. But as much as we appreciate your contributions, doctor, I’ve made a promise to someone I intend to keep.” 

You’re suddenly plucked from Ratchet's hand and you scream loudly. “No! Let me go!”

You watch as Ratchet is dragged out of the room as you struggle to try to get to him. “Your struggle is illogical. There is no escape.” The deep voice of your captor sounded above you. You looked up at Shockwave with fear.

“What do you want from me? You have the formula! And where did you take Ratchet?!”

His single optic glowed a little bit brighter. “It is illogical to kill you when you possess so much potential. As for your Autobot friend, I suspect that Predaking has already made quick work of him.”

You felt as if your world fell apart around you. “I’ll never work for you.” You say quietly.

Shockwave learned in, inches away from your face. “We’ll see about that. There’s more than one way to get you to do as I want. For example- do you still care for the human children?” 

The look of horror on your face was all he needed to see. “It would be a shame if something were to happen to them. The only logical thing to do now is to work with me. Now, hand me the number 13 driver.” Shockwave ordered as he put you onto the table, continuing his work.

You began to cry as you dragged the heavy tool over to him, knowing that you have to do what he says or else he'll take everyone else you love from you.

[quodekash]

ployphach phatchatorn thanawat. she's not in dangerous romance, but man is she pretty and gorgeous and perfect. let's all just think about her for a second.

okay now that that's out of the way, continuing episode 7 of dangerous romance

:( my boy

you silly little man kang, you need to know your limits

I know you wanted to be cool and to prove yourself by eating the spicy food (and also sailom definitely thought the raspy coughing sounds you were making from the spice were kinda sexy-sounding) but sometimes your own health and safety should be prioritised above impressing people

YES YES YES YES YES YES YESSSS

ITS GUYNAWA TIME BABEYYYYYY

AND HE IMMEDIATELY LOOKS RIGHT AT GUY BECAUSE OF COURSE THEYRE SITTING NEXT TO EACH OTHER (well, across the corner but its still technically next to him in my book)

my boy looks uncomfy

I can't tell if its bc of the bar setting or if its bc he's right next to his enemy/crush and his enemy/crush is staring directly at him in a way that says "I want to destroy you" but in a few different ways

HOLY FRICK JUST FRIKIN GRAB HIM AND TAKE HIM TO A RESTROOM AND SMOOCHY SMOOCH GRAB HIS FACE AND MAKE OUT

LMAO HE CALLED HIM NONG

I still dont know if they're going down the maxauto route or not, if its platonic or romantic, but either way their dynamic is incredible and I love it so much

👀

nO

LETS NOT

THAT IS A GROWN-ASS WOMAN

HE IS 17/18

AND HE IS ALSO QUEER AS HELL

SHE'S SO PRETTY BUT AAAAAAA NO

KANG

everybody say thank you kang

"thaaaank youuu kaaaaannngg"

GOUERBIGE4OUWBGSD

WAIT

OMG

OMG

OMG

GVIO3REHJDGPIOHVEJRPIOHJGPIOBEIRJHIOFGIOB9JERHIPO DJHOPFIGO[VBER[VFD[J

I think they're both aware of their feelings for each other but they're afraid of it/rejection and thus express those feelings through anger and I just can't wait for them to hate fuc

PFFT

WHAT IS IT WITH THIS EPISODE AND TELLING VERY-NOT-STRAIGHT CHARACTERS TO GO/BE STRAIGHT

AND "be straight with me" HONEY, HE CAN'T BE STRAIGHT AT ALL, AND HE CAN BE STRAIGHT THE LEAST WHEN HE'S WITH YOU

KISS

THEYRE CHALLENGING EACH OTHER

THEYRE SO FLIRTING

THEYRE SO IN LOVE

HOLY FRICK NUGGETS IM GOING INSANE

they cheersed

THEY CHEERSED THEIR CUPS

THEY DID THE CLINKY CLINK

I can't tell what he's thinking

it could be anywhere from "im so tired" to "he's so hot" to "man I wish I was that bottle rn" to just completely unimpressed

we all knew it would end like this

there was no other way it could've gone

(dear lord jesus please let them kiss in a moment)

HOLY FRICK

HOLY FRICK

I have such a severe case of side couple syndrome idk if you've noticed

im making strange noises

they're so important to me

ghibeisgdkhverbshdgbrehb

I feel like its important for everyone to know that im currently lying on my stomach looking at my laptop with my feet in the air kicking, but im also balancing my pillow on top of my feet because I do that sometimes, and im doing incredibly well at kicking my feet while not letting the pillow fall

GIVUERJDKBG

IM SMILING SO HARD

I LOVE THEM

oh he's recoiling

he has trauma we havent even begun to unpack yet

thinking back to the dog quote, where he implies his dad used harsh methods to "train" him, and he probably hit him a lot. the way he's yelling now, and the way kang is shrinking away in fear, keeping his voice low, avoiding eye contact, tells me this is bringing back a lot of repressed memories of pain and fear

that was... weirdly kind

I think he realised he had an audience, and he has a reputation of goodness to maintain for his election, and he needs to make sure he's still got a good eye from the public, and the public happens to contain kang's friends

but behind closed doors, the monster of pure anger that kang sees him as emerges from the shadows, leaking from all the dark corners of their mansion, and kang shuts himself off to not have to experience the horrors looming above him in the shape of his father

THEY ARE FRIENDS

CAPTAIN GRANDMA, LETS GOOOO

CAPITANO NONNA

YES okay so my thoughts were right

my thoughts were: the 'so we can go official now?' clip is gonna happen this episode

its gonna be kang's bravery in standing up for auto that makes sailom agree to let them be official

but I wasn't sure how that would happen this episode because I wasn't sure if there would be a soccer match this episode

BUT HERE IS PROOF so basically im amazing and im gonna be right and we should all appreciate me

...bRO

is this connection how hes gonna end up at kang's house to steal and commit crimes and perhaps shoot kang's dad @respectthepetty

WHY DO THEY LOOK LIKE THAT

WHY DO THEY LOOK LIKE THAT

HOLY FRICK

THATS RIDICULOUS

HOW ARE THEY GONNA MOVE IN THOSE CLOTHES, THE GUYS ARE IN FULL ASS SUITS

MAN I DONT LIKE THIS

THAT SUCKS

I THOUGHT MAYBE THE CHEERLEADING WAS ACTUALLY KIND OF GOOD IN THIS SHOW AND NOT TOXIC AND NOT EXPLOITATIVE OF WOMEN BUT APPARENTLY I WAS WRONG

anyway

oh

well- I feel slightly better about it now

okay they do look lovely and pimfah loves it and doesnt like feel uncomfortable so thats good

I just. you would think they would wear something less fancy for a... soccer game

ME

felt that

my emotions are stored in my eyes bro, whatever it is, its coming out in tears

GROUP HUGSSS I love group hugs

ITS BEEN TWO HOURS AND I HAVE FIFTEEN MINUTES LEFT OF THE EPISODE, LETS SEE HOW LONG IT TAKES ME TO WATCH 15 MINUTES (find out in the next post because I once again talked too much)

[bwabys-scenarios]

Reunited

Illumi x Reader

Part 5

pt. 4

pt. 6

(Name) failed to stand while her friends ran over to help her. The girl thought for a moment she might be hallucinating when she saw a red tint in Kurapika’s eye as he knelt down to her.

“Are you alright?”

The boy placed a hand on her shoulder, his touch light as a feather. (Name) nodded, and with Kurapika’s help she stood.

“I think he was just toying with me. Probably got bored standing around,” she attempted to calm herself by reasoning that was his intention.

“Perhaps. We should stay away from him just to be safe.”

Leorio gripped the handle of his suit case so tight (Name) was afraid it would break. “Fucking creep. If he wasn’t so terrifying and I wouldn’t be at risk for elimination, Id teach that clown a lesson on how to treat a lady.” he huffed out, his nostrils flaring.

(Name) gave a weak smile at this, even letting out a short chuckle. Killua watched her carefully as Gon held her hand.

“Just stay near us, ok? Aunt Mito always said that you should protect ladies from creeps.”

(Name) laughed and ruffled his hair. “Your Aunt Mito is a smart woman, and she raised a very sweet boy.”

Gon skipped around happily at this compliment. Killua followed after him, sparing her a glance.

“Be more careful.”

He remarked, before turning away. Once they were out of sight (Name)’s smile faded into a frown.

‘I hope he doesn’t do that again. Hisoka seems like an unpredictable guy and I don’t want to get involved with him.’

(Name) sighed.

———————

Soon after the incident, they were instructed to continue following Mr. Satotz, this time through the swamp.

“Now everyone, please make sure to follow close behind me. I can’t guarantee your safety if you don’t.”

(Name) shivered at the thought of getting lost. She wasn’t the best at directions or tracking, so she tried her best to keep pace with the front of the group.

“Don’t overexert yourself.”

(Name) turned to see Kurapika jogging effortlessly beside her, having sprinted a bit to catch up. “You remember how long the last Phase was. You don’t want to use up all your strength now.”

(Name) bit her lip. She knew he was right, she was already exhausted and was running on fumes. If she didn’t pace herself she’d end up passing out.

“Don’t worry Kurapika, I’ll slow down. Im just… scared of getting lost.”

He nodded, watching her to make sure she slowed her pace to a jog, taking her place near the middle of the pack.

Illumi watched her out of the corner of his eye. Hisoka grinned.

“You’re staring at her again, ‘Lumi.” Hisoka purred, his cold eyes glancing between Illumi and (Name).

“Not staring, observing.” He smacked away Hisokas hand that reached out to touch his cheek.

“Don’t call me that either. I’m already angry with you for earlier, trust me when I say you don’t want to incur any more of my wrath,” he whispered, his monotone voice cold as ice.

30 minutes ago

Hisoka slinked away from (Name), having achieved what he had sought her out for.

“Hisoka.”

Said man stopped in his tracks, his grin spreading across his face.

“What is it dear?” He almost sang out his response towards Illumi.

The space around them grew tense, and reeked of intense bloodlust. Hisoka turned to face Illumi, his smile faltering slightly at the sight of the enraged man.

In a second there was a needle at Hisoka’s throat, the tip causing blood to bead at the surface of his pale skin.

“I understand you’re curious and want to push my buttons, but you will NOT touch her again. She is not yours to play with. Do you understand?”

There wasn’t any room for negotiation. Hisoka huffed and pushed the needle away with his index finger.

“You’re such a party pooper, ‘Lumi.”

Illumi tensed at the nickname and pressed the needle against his jugular again.

“Fine. I won’t bother your little pet.”

Illumi relaxed and slid the needle pack into his sleeve. He left without another word, his figure being watched by Hisoka as he did.

“For now.”

Current Time

Hisoka licked his lips.

“Mmm… I think I’ll hang near the back. I feel some animosity towards me and I would love to stretch my legs a bit.”

Illumi nodded. “As long as you behave yourself I don’t care what you do.”

“Oh dear.”

(Name) glanced around her, her heart racing a million miles a minute. She could hear anguished screams and cries all around her, but couldn’t see a single person. The fog had gotten too thick to see anything.

“Kurapika? Leorio? Gon?”

She called out their names to receive no answer. She could barely even hear her own voice over all the screaming and wailing.

The girl sighed and closed her eyes before running in the direction away from the screams. She figured going towards them would only result in her own death.

As she ran, she regularly yelled her friends names. Still, no one replied.

About ten minutes had passed since she lost sight of her friends, and her surroundings had grown eerily quiet.

The sound was gone, but it was replaced by the awful scent of decay and rot. (Name) scrunched up her nose, gagging a bit as she tries to navigate her surroundings.

The fog finally began to let up. (Name) was surrounded by long, thin trees with thick trunks, which roots stretched into murky water. She realized she’d nearly walked right into the depths.

She shivered. (Name) wondered if there were any alligators nearby, ready to eat gobble her up.

“I wonder if anyone else has found themselves in this part of the swamp.”

She muttered aloud, tracing her fingertips on the bark of the trees as she walked by.

The smell was becoming more pungent, and for a moment she questioned if she’d find a dead body.

Lucky her, there was no dead body. But where the smell was most concentrated (Name) found a field of flowers.

She stopped, kneeling down to closer inspect the flower.

This was a mistake.

Before she even realized it, the flower sprayed a mist into her eyes. (Name) let out a blood curdling scream, falling into the flowers while holding her eyes.

The last thing she saw before losing consciousness was a corpse carefully hidden within the field of flowers.

—————

(Name) opened her eyes to see… nothing. For a calm moment she thought she was still asleep, cuddled up with her stuffed animals in bed.

Then she remembered what had happened to cause her to pass out and jolted awake, struggling against something her still numb mind couldn’t comprehend.

“I see you’re awake. Calm down, if you don’t stop struggling I’ll drop you.”

(Name) wiggled for a second more before she gave up, resting her head against something soft. Soft?

She then realized she was being carried on someone’s back. Strong arms held her firmly in place, keeping her from slipping with ease.

“I can’t see.”

She stated plainly.

“I know.”

She reached her hand up to and felt around before feeling something smooth. A hand grabbed her own and placed it gently away from what she’d been touching.

“Keep your hands to yourself and stop moving. I can’t see.”

Oh. She’d been touching their face.

“Found you in a field of Blinding Blossoms. You really should be careful.”

(Name) was still too groggy to question why this stranger was helping her. She just nodded her head and leaned against their shoulder.

“I will. Thank you.”

She leaned forward and planted a small kiss on the persons cheek.

He stopped, nearly falling over. (Name) let out a squeak, nearly being launched off their back.

She grabbed wilding for something to hold on, and it ended up being hair.

“Eek! What was all that for?”

She steadied herself, letting go of the silky soft hair she’d pulled on before and softly apologizing.

The person didn’t reply, only continued walking, this time faster. (Name) huffed as she relaxed again.

“Sooo. Never been kissed before?”

“Please stop talking.”

The rest of the ride was quiet. (Name) didn’t want to be dropped off into a ditch while she was helpless so she didn’t tease him any further.

At some point she was gently sat down against a tree for a moment. The person who had been carrying her had said he’d needed to use the bathroom. She did too, but there was no way she’d ask for their help with something like that.

A moment later he was back. (Name) wondered how he was able to pee so quickly, before the sounds of clicking and cracking was heard.

“What’s… that sound?”

The person didn’t answer, instead he picked her up again, this time bridal style.

“I-I can walk!”

She said, flustered. The person shrugged.

“Much easier to carry you than hold your hand and guide you. That would take too long.”

His replies were always straight to the point. The girl reluctantly nodded.

She reached up to touch his face again, this time his soft cheeks were tense and rough. She tilted her head curiously.

The man sighed, again pushing her hands away.

“You are a curious creature. If you continue to touch me I’ll have to tie your hands together. You’re being very distracting.”

Even his voice had changed. She didn’t question it, opting to stay quiet. Maybe he spontaneously went through puberty while taking a wee.

(Name) heard chatter up ahead. At this point, the man had put her down and instructed her to hold onto the back of his shirt. She wasn’t complaining though, she was tired of being held.

“Two more have passed this phase.”

She heard someone call out as she was guided to the finishing point. (Name) let out a squeal and hugged her guide’s back in excitement.

“We made it! Thank you… uh…”

He hadn’t told her his name before. The man tensed, stepping out of her grasp so quick she nearly fell over.

“You’re welcome.”

He replied hesitantly. The two stood in an always silence before she felt him grab her hand and place some cloth in it.

“Rub your eyes with this. Should help.”

She obliged, and when she opened her eyes again, he was gone. All that was left behind was a handkerchief.

Written on the edge in neat cursive was “Property of Illumi Zoldyck”.

[fandom-blackhole]

Can I get some hurt/comfort with Joel. ❤️ you can choose whatever scenario

You can get whatever you want my lovely anon <3. I hope you like this! Sorry it took me so long, school keeps me busy and I got a little side tracked with my GoW obsession lol. Thanks for the request!

Warnings: MAJOR SPOILERS for both tlou p1 and p2, just spoilers in general, not edited, reader has no gender or physical description, no y/n

WC: 1.8k

Summary: Reader comforts Joel when he comes back to Jackson.

You didn’t know much. You knew that Ellie had left in the middle of the night, not saying a single word to anyone and only taking a horse and a few supplies with her. You also knew that she had left a small note behind for Joel to find, and once he had, every drop of rationality in his body flew out the window as he flew out of Jackson on the back of his own horse, his own supplies and weapons haphazardly packed. You’d watched him leave with an ache in your heart, a feeling of foreboding gripping your very being. 

And you stood there watching the long closed gates that Joel had disappeared though. You’re not really sure how long you stood there, worry etched on your features, no one bothered you, just walked past you as if you were merely a statue, cold and frozen. Of course, at some point you heard the tell of whispers behind you. They weren’t good whispers however, you could make out just enough to piece their conversion together.

“How long have they been standin’ there,” Tommy’s voice carried over to where you stood. The second voice hesitated, but once they spoke up you recognized it as a local named Chris, you assumed he was probably on guard duty for the day.

“Since Joel left. Hasn’t moved a muscle. I’m not even completely sure they’ve blinked.”

A tired and concerned sigh followed before Maria’s voice answered, “Thanks Chris, you can return to your work now. I’ll go talk to them. Tommy, think you can take care of things without burning the town to the ground until I get them settled?”

From the corner of your eye you watched Tommy lean down and press a quick kiss to Maria’s temple and reply, “I can make no promises, but I sure will try not to.”

You heard more than saw Tommy leave as your gaze focused back onto the gate. You knew deep down that both Joel and Ellie were going to be gone for a few days at least, but you couldn’t pull your eyes from the wooden frames. Something also told you that both of them would come back unharmed, at least physically, emotionally you weren’t so sure. Something was going to be shifted when Joel and Ellie got back, for better or worse you weren’t sure.

So as Maria’s hand came to rest on your shoulder, you looked to her with a half hearted smile, one you knew she could see through. She did not acknowledge it however, instead she only gave a small knowing smile of her own and offered, “How about we go round up some lunch for ourselves?”

---

A week passed, and a few more days on top of it. Each day you found yourself taking the long way to and from your daily work around town just so you could pass the gate, and with each disappointing pass your heart squeezed in worry. 

They're both fine, if anyone can survive running around out there it's Joel and Ellie, you find yourself repeating in your head over and over in attempts to overshadow the doubts and anxieties that have kept you up at night and have you zoning out while working during the day. Tommy and Maria have often had to come and break you from your thoughts, both showing their worry for you and sharing reassurances, but each time your heart aches and whispers saying, they'll come back but they aren't going to be the same. 

And you can't break the anxious cycle. So here you find yourself now, curled in the corner of your faded and worn couch, eyes fixed across the room on the mantle of your unlit fireplace, on a small wooden duck carving which Joel had gifted you while almost bashfully brushing away your praise at his craftsmanship. You could still see the light dusting of red across his cheeks as you had told him how much the gift meant to you. Now though, as you looked at the carefully carved feathers, your eyes started to swim, your anxieties louder than any reassurance tonight.

You sat there for awhile, night long fallen and light disappearing from the room and limiting your view of the room, of the carving. You now you could stand, could cross the room and turn on the lamp that stood there and brighten the room once more, but instead you find yourself unwilling to move, unable to even let the tears clouding your eyes fall. Repeatedly you tell yourself to just move, to go to your room and at least lay down and try to rest.

The calls to rest finally started to settle deep in your bones. The exhaustion of very little sleep over the last few days cause you body to sag and limbs feel as heavy as they truly are. So with a sigh to muster what little energy you have left in your creaking joints, you slowly unfurl yourself from the corner of the couch and start towards your room. You find yourself pausing at your door frame though, as the soft sound of footsteps on your porch reach your ears in the deafening quiet. You stand there, ears searching for more noise and holding your breath and just as you have made up your mind that your sleep deprived state has managed to get out of had and made you start to hallucinate, that is when a hesitant but sturdy knock echoed from your door and you find your mind quiet for the first time in over a week as you slowly approach your door and pull it open. 

There standing there with his head down and shoulders slumped you find Joel. When you open the door he lifts his head enough to meet your gaze, and in those swirling hazel eyes you find a broken and sad man, and you find that in the shock and worry of seeing such an emotion on Joel’s face energy fills your tired body once more.

"Tommy…Tommy told me that I should come tell you I made it back. He said that after I'd left in a rush you'd been in a constant state of worry over me n' Ellie," Joel manages to say, his voice obviously thick with emotion and tiredness. 

Without a word, or much thought, you stepped aside and motioned him to come in. Joel hesitates for a moment at the threshold but crosses into your home. 

"Sorry if I woke you," he says as you walk over to turn on the light you'd been trying to convince yourself to turn on for most of the night. You just shook your head at him and gave him a tired smile, "You didn't."

Quiet surrounded the two of you after that, both standing on opposite sides of the room and both unsure how to broach the thickness standing between the two of you. Eventually, after a few too many quiet moments, you find yourself unable to resist the draw towards Joel. So gently and slowly, you take a few cautious steps towards him until you finally find yourself standing in front of him. 

"What happened Joel," you gently whisper.

It seemed whatever composure Joel had had at that moment was broken by your soft question. A single tear dropped from one of his eyes and he opened his mouth to try and speak, but all he could get out was a stuttered, "I-i…i…," before his head dropped and he shook his head, his chest rising and falling with silent sobs.

Heart in your throat, you reached out and cupped both sides of his face bringing Joel to look at you once more. You didn't say anything, knowing it better to just wait and let Joel speak for himself, so you wiped his tears away as he leaned into your comfort for a sense of support with closed eyes and you watched the strong man crumble in a way you never thought he could.

"I've lost her…I've lost Ellie, and I don't think she'll ever forgive me," Joel finally manages to choke out once his tears stopped only a few minutes after they began.

Heartbreaking at his sorrow, you continue to rub soothing circles into his cheeks until he opened his eyes and met your own.

"Joel," you whisper full of worry, "what happened out there?"

He stared into your eyes for a few moments, his thoughts flickering across his eyes as it was clear he was grappling and hesitating with something, but eventually he only shook his head with a sigh and pulled back out of your hands. When he finally spoke again, his voice was clearer, closer to what it usually sounds like, less emotion slipping through the cracks of the high walls he had built.

"Ellie…she learned the truth…of a lie i have been telling her for-for years," he pauses and looks down at his boots, "And because of that lie, she hates me now."

You want to reach out for him again, you want to tell him that that can't be the case, that Ellie does love him, but you can't because you don't know what all has happened between the two of them, it's been a secret the two had always guarded closely. So instead, with a heavy heart, you grab his hand, squeezing it in what you hope will feel reassuring.

"I…Joel, I won't ask for you to tell me more, but I want you know I am here to listen…I don't care what's happened in your past, I only wish to help. So…so I am here, for you, whenever you need…"

You squeeze his hand again seeing his eyes lock with yours easier now, his emotions and hurt still echoing in their depths. 

And after a few seconds he nods, squeezing your hand back, gripping your hand in a way that seemed to ask you not to leave him, to stay. So you smile softly and reach forward with your free hand, cupping Joel’s cheek, and say, "Stay…tonight? Here with me?"

Joel doesn't say anything, his eyes flickering between your own before nodding. 

After that neither of you speak. You lock your door and Joel removes his coat and boots, leaving both by your couch before turning off the lamp. Both of you move quietly to your room. You crawl onto your bed first and once you're fully situated Joel follows you. Once both of you are under the blankets and facing each other, he hesitates before curling into you, he buries his head into your neck and you move your one of your hands to bury in his hair at the nape of his neck, tracing circles and press your nose to the top of his head. 

Just as you are drifting off to sleep, Joel's own soft breathing matching your own, you whisper, "Goodnight Joel."

And as you're consciousness is fading away, you feel Joel intertwine his fingers with your free hand and whisper back, "Thank you."

Requests are open! Please send them to my askbox! <3 Thanks for Reading!!!

[writingsofestella]

vespera - ch. 4

Apostate!Din Djarin x Ex!Jedi!OC -(no use of Y/N) Canon Divergent - some plot changed for sake of story, the razor crest lives )

tws // general canon violence, usage of blasters and weapons, mentions of death, minors DNI 18+ only, angst, mature content, more tags to be added later on

a/n: sorry for such the long wait!!! i got my inspiration back for writing, so i hope you all like these next few chapter!! we finally get lore, and the reason Din has tracked her down once again.

wc: 2437

previous chapter: [here]

The walk back to her home was tense, quiet, filled with an uneasy silence that made the hairs on her neck stand straight up. However, the rest of the village was much like this too. The uneasy quietness that fell upon the village after the raid was not something she thought she'd ever feel here.

The Mandalorian's steps were silent in the dirt, despite his size, his armor. He kept in step with her pace, walking next to her, as if he hadn't chased her down half the galaxy. He was silent, but out of the corner of her eye, she could see how his helmet constantly surveyed his surroundings. Waiting for another attack or a trap.

As if he wasn't walking her into what was most likely a trap.

Grogu was making small noises, held in his father's arms. He was trying to reach out her, trying to get her attention. She had to ignore it, trying to focus on her surroundings, keep her guard up.

The adrenaline was still pumping through her veins, her body, the Force keeping her hyperaware. It helped her ignore the lingering pain in her leg.

They approached her little home, on the outskirts of the village. Standing in front of her door, she could feel the Mandalorian standing behind her. She shifted her feet, as if half prepared to slip inside and lock him out. Or run. Or both.

But she would be lying if she said she had the energy to outrun a Mandalorian.

Sighing internally, she shook her head, finally opening the door for the both of them to come in. "Can't believe I'm letting a Mandalorian bounty hunter into my home." She half muttered to herself.

"This isn't how I imagined our reunion going either, if it's any consolation." The Mandalorian quipped back, his voice dry.

She simply gave a deadpan look, watching as the bounty hunter walked past her as she held the door open, shutting it behind him and Grogu both. "Right, because your idea of a reunion would be me in cuffs being handed over to your employer." She said, her eyes watching him, analyzing him as he stood there.

He almost looked out of place in her home, all metal and leather, a trained fighter and killer. While her home was built out of natural stone, with plants and fruits, a healer's home. The only thing that stood out, that made the armored killer look even slightly less intimidating, was the tiny green child. One who seemed to be holding onto him, happy to be in his arms again.

"More or less." He responded, his helmet finally looking back down at her, tilting slightly. "Things changed."

"So you mentioned. What is this common interest of ours, then?" She asked him, crossing her arms, putting her weight on her good leg.

"Why don't we sit down?" He commented. "Can't imagine that blaster shot of yours is feeling too good right now." He added on, with a tilt of his head.

Her eyes narrowed at him. She didn't take orders from anyone, let alone a bounty hunter. But only because her leg was hurting, she decided to sit at the table she had. She watched as he followed suit, sitting across from her. Grogu's head barely made it above the table, she took note of.

There was an uneasy silence that grew between the both of them. She leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms, staring him down. Trying to summon some of that exaggerated courage she had once, when facing down too many bounty hunters to count. None of them had saved her though, and none of them had a Force sensitive child.

"I don't suppose our common interest is your child." She spoke first, taking control of the conversation.

"Partially." He answered with, and his helmet tilted down to look at Grogu, sitting on his lap. After listening to Grogu babble something or another, his head looked back up to her. "I was sent to find you."

Her eyes narrowed at him. "By your employers, I presume."

She would defend herself if need be. He would not drag her back. She would not go with him, would not be taken in as a bounty.

"No." He answered, surprising her. "An… acquaintance, you could say."

She stared at him, both confused and on edge, not quite sure if he was lying or not. The Force inside of her told her that he was telling the truth, mostly. "An acquaintance."

He gave a nod of his helmet, and then was reaching into his satchel. On instinct, she jerked from her position, a hand gripping onto the table, ready to bolt.

"Calm, Jetii." He said, pausing in his movements, helmet staring her down. His voice a low rumble. "I swore I would not harm you."

She bristled at the name he called her. She was smart enough to know the word he spoke, and it took everything in her power to run just from that. She was already on edge. Last time he had pulled something from his satchel, from a prior meeting, it had been cuffs, intending on taking her hostage, to cash in on her bounty.

"You do not have the most trustworthy track record, Mandalorian." She finally responded.

He stared her down, only a table separating them, really. She was already weakened from her work in the clinic, from getting shot. How easy would it be for him to take her down, capture her now?

It was only Grogu's cooing that made her tear her gaze from his father.

The child looked up at her with his big eyes, ears tilted downwards. His little clawed hand reached out to her, as if trying to reach for her.

Help?

"It's only because of your child I even let you in my home." She finally spoke, leaning back in her seat again, but still ready to bolt if need be.

"Then perhaps this will convince you."

He pulled out a small holo-device, barely larger than his gloved palm. It looked like it had seen better days, old and probably from during the war. He set it down on the table, sliding it to the middle and pressing a button on it.

At first, she saw nothing, as the old thing made noises that sounded like it was struggling to turn on. Then, a small, blue, flickering hologram appeared. A young man, she thought, with light colored hair. Wearing all dark. Her eyes narrowed as she saw what looked like a lightsaber at his hip.

"Hello Mandalorian. This is Luke Skywalker. I have a request for you." The hologram started.

Her eyes widened, eyebrows furrowing.

Faintly, she could hear Grogu cooing in interest, but she sat there, mind racing.

Luke Skywalker?

"There is a Jedi that I would like you to find. If my sources are to be believed, she is on the planet of Amia. It is of utmost importance that she comes here. She may be the last Jedi healer ever taught before the Order fell, and we need to preserve whatever teachings we can find. For the next Jedi."

Her grip was so tight on the table, but she didn't even notice, as she stared at the hologram, watching as the image flickered in and out. Her mind and heart racing, trying to understand this all. She had never met Luke Skywalker. She knew of him only from the rumors and reports that spread through the galaxy of his actions to take down the Empire. Of his power.

Yet he seemed to know everything about her.

"She goes by Fyra Thane now."

Fyra, as she was now called, stopped hearing the words he spoke after that. Staring at the hologram, lost in thought. Still as a statue. Eventually the hologram fizzled out, as the recording finishing. And there was an uneasy silence that filled her home afterwords.

Someone here knew what she was. They knew. Who? Who could have known? Who knew Luke Skywalker, a Jedi himself? Who was feeding him this information?

How did a Mandalorian bounty hunter even know a Jedi? Something told her that the small green child, who looked so much like a Jedi Master of her past, was the reason for all of this.

"What is in this for you?" She finally broke the silence, tearing her gaze from the holo-device to stare back up at him. Her voice was a controlled calm, her hand holding onto the table so tightly. "I am sure my bounty would give you more credits than he would."

"As satisfying as it would be to bring you in after you have evaded me time and time again," he started, "I believe it is in both of our best interests to not hand you over."

"And why is that?" She dared to ask.

"Considering the bounty on his head was imperial scientists, I don't think it's too hard of a guess as to who put the bounty on you." He spoke, his voice even and short.

She felt her heart stutter, in both fear and anger. Her eyes glanced from the Mandalorian down to Grogu. He had been hunted, too? Already, at such a young age? It made her angry, that she had failed in her actions that had caused the bounty to be placed on her head in the first place. Disappointed in herself, that she couldn't do what had been needed. Surely, it had caused him to be hunted.

She shook her head, once. "No. It's not." Her voice quiet. She thought for a moment, trying to process all of this. "And if you turned me in-"

"They would come after him, again." He finished with, his voice steely with resolve. The type of voice she had come to expect from a faceless bounty hunter, trained to kill and hunt from childhood. "They know I have him. So if I turned you in, they would-"

"I know what they are capable of, Mandalorian." She shot back, cutting him off before he could continue on that comment. "I know what they would do, and what they have done." She spoke, voice low and even, staring him down.

She let out a tense sigh, closing her eyes for just a moment, trying to let the Force wash over her, to calm her once more. This was a lot to take in.

"What if I don't go with you to see Skywalker?" She dared to ask, opening her eyes once again. She couldn't help the curious nature inside of her, to see what he would say.

He just stared at her, impassive through the helmet, but she could almost sense his annoyance through his beskar. For wearing such impressive armor, it seemed to be too easy to get under his skin.

"You could stay here and have another attempt made at your life." He finally retorted.

She hadn't even had the chance to process that. That Henry had truly, willfully, shot at her. For the first time in months, she felt that danger, lingering around her like a curse, a shadow that would not leave.

She had been foolish to think that she could ever have a home.

"How do I know you won't do the same to me while we're traveling to wherever Skywalker is at?" She countered, but she knew she was in a situation with only one clear answer. "Even if you don't turn me in for that bounty, you haven't exactly been cordial in the past."

Perhaps it wasn't fair to hold his attempts to capture her in front of them. He had been doing a job, and she understood that. But how could she possibly begin to even believe him?

"You saved Grogu." Was the response that finally came. "And he seems to trust you."

Grogu let out a cooing noise, looking from his buir to her once more. His big eyes staring at her. As if trying to convince her to come with them, to go to Luke. She could almost hear him, his tiny little voice, trying to speak to her through the Force.

It was a stupid idea, really. To go with the Mandalorian and his child. His force-sensitive child, who was already so strong and powerful in the Force. All because a rumored hero of the galaxy wanted to learn what she knew for future generations of jedi.

"Would I save you from that sniper if I had just planned on killing you later?" He challenged her, yet she could hear the genuine curiosity in his voice.

"For personal satisfaction? I wouldn't blame you if you did." She retorted dryly.

A noise almost like a huff came from his helmet, as he tilted his head to look at her. It was almost comical, seeing him sitting in the chair. He was not short nor narrow by any means, she took note of. He was broad and tall, and he seemed so out of place in her home. All metal and fight, of battle, in her home of nature and healing. She supposed there were two sides to every battle.

"You saved Grogu." He repeated out. "He is part of my… clan." She could hear the care in his voice, despite how much he might have tried to hide it. Yet the struggle too, as if he could not accept that Grogu was with him again. "You saved him, so you have my word no harm will come to you by my hand."

A life for a life, then.

She rubbed her face, all of this too much for her to truly think through right now. She couldn't stay here. With the sudden appearance of Grogu, and how he instantly latched himself onto her, the other villagers suspected her. Add on his hunter of a father and Henry's attack, she knew it was only a matter of time before she got hurt even worse than today. She suspected people already knew she wasn't normal, especially Jir.

She dropped her hand to stare at the both of them. Taking in who would be her traveling companion for however long it would take, if she agreed. A Mandalorian bounty hunter she had evaded time and time again, who had once been coldhearted and ruthless, willing to hand her over to Imperials. And his child, a creature with eyes so big and wide, full of so much innocence but so much hurt already, who had wormed his way into the stone cold hunter. A child with powers like her own, a creature also hunted.

"When do we leave?"

all writing is my own. please do not redistribute, repost, or share on other platforms. thank you

[ taglist: @znerac @dinwifey - to be added to the taglist, feel free to ask!]

[pensat-i-fet]

The best assistant (Rúben Dias x Reader)

**Very shocking, I know. But the gorgeous coat and my lovely anons inspired me to write a little imagine once again ❤️ short but sweet this time. Enjoy!**

Word count: 798

Masterlist

Wattpad

It was the FA cup weekend again, and you had been sent to the Etihad to cover the City-Chelsea match for the BBC. You always loved the cup because instead of just doing post-match interviews, you also got to be on presenter duty.

Being in Manchester also meant you got to see your boyfriend Rúben after the match. And probably before and during since he was injured and wouldn't be with the rest of the squad during warm-ups.

The bad thing about today was that you forgot to check the weather forecast. Again.

So here you were in Manchester wearing a not thick enough jacket. Very cute jacket but…it was not going to keep you warm at all.

You kept on jumping, trying not to look too ridiculous, and rubbing your arms to warm yourself up a bit. The last thing you needed was chattering teeth while speaking on TV. 

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Rúben signing autographs and taking photos with some fans. When he was done, he spotted you and moved to where you were standing after noticing you still weren’t on air.

“Hi”, he said, hugging you and kissing your cheek.

“Hi. Done attending your adoring fans?”

“No, don’t worry. I still have time for you”.

You rolled your eyes when another shiver made you hug yourself. It really was cold today. 

When you looked up at Rúben, you saw him frowning.

“Why do you never wear something weather appropriate?”, he said, shaking his head.

“I didn’t realise it was going to be so cold. But it’s fine. We’ll be indoors during the match. It’s just a couple of minutes of suffering”.

“I could ask the team for a coat for you or something”, he suggested.

“I can’t wear any team’s clothes. But maybe I could hide inside your coat. Why is it so big?”

“Oversize coats are trendy!”

“Whatever you say. Now go, we need to start working”.

With another kiss, he left to join the team on the bench. And you, somehow, managed to do the pre-match presenting without turning blue. 

                                       **

It was an easy win for City. And you were happy to be able to go to the press area to do the post-match interviews. The heating was on and very much appreciated by your cold body. When you got back inside after half-time, your hands were so cold it almost hurt to move your fingers. Thankfully one of your colleagues had a spare pair of gloves, so at least that was sorted.

After your interviews, it was time to wait for one of your colleagues to interview the Chelsea players before you could do the final bit of presenting. You thought about staying inside the tunnel for as long as you could and it was there you found Rúben again.

“What are you doing here?”, you asked, curious. You expected him to be in the dressing room celebrating with his teammates.

“Making sure you’re still alive”.

“Well, barely”, you finally admitted.

Rúben then opened his coat and brought you closer to him so you could also be covered by it.

“See? I told you it was too big”, you joked, but also hugged him tighter, enjoying the warmth of the coat and of his body.

“I need to buy them two sizes bigger for all the times when you forget to bring one”.

“Maybe I should hire you as my assistant”.

“I would be the best assistant”, he said, proudly.

“I have no doubts about that”.

But then it was time for you two to separate and for you to finish work.

“Take the coat”, said Rúben while you were walking back to the pitch.

"It's just five minutes. I'll be fine and I don’t want you to get cold".

"If it's just five minutes, I'll be fine too", he shrugged, moving away from the camera.

Rúben took off the coat and put it on your shoulders, leaving quickly when he saw the looks he was getting from the tv crew.

You then realised how big it actually was. I mean, if it looked oversize on him…but managed to make it look decent by rolling the sleeves up a bit and using the hair clip you always carried with you, for when you had to put your hair up, on the back to make it look smaller.

                                        **

“Thank you very much for joining us today and we’ll see you tomorrow for the Oxford-Arsenal tie. Until then, take care”.

“Perfect”, said the producer. “Now we go to the pub to let the beers warm us up a bit, right?”

“You go have fun, guys”, you said. “I have to return this coat”.

“Right. We all know what that’s code for”, laughed one of your cameramen, winking at you.

[inkwolvesandcoffee]

Cards & Conversations (Werewolf!Alfie Solomons x Reader)

Genre: Romance, Angst, Drama

Pairing: Werewolf!Alfie Solomons x Shelby!Reader

Word count: 3.8K

Warnings: Mild swearing, difficult father-daughter relationship, emotional abuse, melancholy thoughts, allusion to past violence and death, scars

Summary: We lose things over the years. Family members, innocence, the perfect world you held for a single summer.

Your heart.

But sometimes the gods are gracious and re-entwine your fate with the person you thought you lost forever, vanished after a heated conversation you were shut out of. Carefully shut away in a gilded cage again with only a blank page and his old typewriter for company. However, the tarot cards your brother gave you know what happened ten years ago.

They know why the King has returned to Camden.

Author’s note: This wee piece has turned out heavier in plot than I thought, enough so for me to want to work this out into a proper multi-part story in the future because there is a lot to dissect here and it feels kinda rushed. To me, that is, maybe not to you. Ah dinnae ken.

Anyways, I kept the tarot reading a bit shallow if only because I am still a beginner/someone who does it as a hobby. 

TH Masterlist

Tag list: @potter-solomons​ @vir-tual​ @zablife​ @buttercup32sstuff​ @ilovemanypeople​ @hecatemoon87​ @dreamlandcreations​ @elijahssuit​ @liliac-dreamer​ @alikaheroes​​

Support can come from the most unexpected corner, yet exceed your expectations in tenderness. 

A condolence card.

Flowers for your mother’s grave.

An arm around your shoulders throughout the funeral.

A hand to hold yours while navigating the chaotic and dangerous streets of London when finally having a chance to escape the mansion on the hill.

Fingers to keep yours, comically small compared to his, warm outside. 

In bookshops, only let go of during a cup of coffee or tea should it have a café.

An unnaturally warm body to snuggle up to whenever you feel cold.

Shoulders to be carried on during the odd trip down to Margate.

But those holidays during which my brother, Charlie, and I were kept out of business and separated from the rest of our family came to an end. About ten years ago, a long-standing peace pact was broken.

I can still recall the argument resounding from the drawing room. It’s funny how I thought shielding my ears would not have it touch me. Naive, really, innit?

“You crossed the line, Alfie.”

“You fuckin’ what?”

“You crossed the line.”

“The line?”

“She’s my daughter!”

But that wasn’t the real issue. No, there were two actual problems.

One, I’m Thomas Shelby’s and Grace Burgess’s daughter.

Two, according to my father, despite the similarities in hair and eye colour between us, I am the living embodiment of the only woman he’s ever loved. Don’t get me wrong, Lizzie is great and we get along well. Ruby, bless her spirited little heart, is as much of a sibling to me as Charlie is. 

But she isn’t Mum.

And Thomas wouldn’t let her memory be tainted by a connection to his greatest rival and ally, Alfie Solomons.

The King of Camden.

The alpha of the Camden Town Pack. 

The man who stole my heart ten years ago. 

That brings me to problem number three, hidden in the shadows and all too gladly forgotten. 

I was sixteen. He was thirty-six. 

At the time I didn’t know he had imprinted on me. Neither could I have guessed that there were such a thing as werewolves. The supernatural, in general. It was only when I started working in an odd little bakery run by an elderly woman I discovered how thin the veil between the realms are and what it means to have a certain heritage.

Aunt Polly is right.

We shake hands with devils and we walk past them. 

It’s a blessing to be a witch. But also to be a woman locked in a gilded cage, albeit, paradoxically, with a chance to have a life outside the family business. To have a talent for writing and being able to make a living out of it. To have fans curious about my stories, eager to read them and rejoice whenever they see me at signings and book events.

While I’m glad for what the gods have gifted me, to be a modern filid and possess a sixth sense, I might owe them for the rest of my life.

Because only last month they gave me back my heart.

Drunk, his hair and beard out of control, an ugly deep scar over his left eye leaving it blind, and soaked by the rain, he was there.

Alfie.

On my doorstep.

“So you’re the new witch in town, eh? Set up shop in me borough. Me kingdom,” he drawled. However, the way he leant in the doorway with haunted blue eyes ruined the mock indignation at once. A careful though gentle smile spread on his lips as he took me in. “Fuckin’ ‘ell, you’re even prettier than I remember.”

He leaned in, almost toppling over with unsteady feet. “I’m sorry. I couldn’t save us.” I am still uncertain whether he was heavily sniffling or it was a sob he tried to conceal. ‘‘This godforsaken soul couldn’t save you.’’

Thomas walked in at that moment, acknowledging our surprise guest in a cool voice. “Alfie.”

The prodigal alpha of Camden clumsily righted himself, glaring at the tyrant of the Westminster townhouse. “Tommy, good to see you. ‘Ow’s business?”

“Never been better.” Thomas shifted his attention to me. “Y/N, go upstairs. Mister Solomons and I have to talk.”

“I’m not-’’ I began, looking over my shoulder.

“Go upstairs!”

“Don’t yell at her!” Alfie roared before turning to me with a softer voice. “Go upstairs, right? It’s okay. We’ll talk tomorrow… if me head can remember.”

I clenched my fists, trying to keep my breathing even. As per usual, I managed. Still, I could feel myself hanging on by a thread, ragged around my throat.

Always pushed into the corner one way or the other.

Always me.

Why does it always have to be me?

Locked away in loneliness.

Shut away in a prison more cruel than The Tower. Left to my own devices and thoughts dedicated to the shadows, the dark corners of my mind.

Upstairs, Charlie walked out of his room, pale and concern etched on his face. He’s only too aware of how Thomas regards me and to this day makes sure I get treated as fairly as possible. “What’s happening? Why was he yelling at you?”

“The King has returned,” I mumbled, quickly brushing past him since I my pride refused me to let him see the tears brimming on my lashes. Footsteps as loud as a ghost’s, I slipped into my room and closed the door as softly as I could behind me.

The war inside was no one’s business, only for me to fight.

Another night of spilling the blood of its casualties on the page, somewhere between the lines a remembrance for the girl who hoped to rise like a phoenix. Another silent funeral for my soul.

An author is, essentially, all the characters she has created and is yet to create. My stories are told by people that carry little bits of myself, carefully concealed behind a fictional mask. But that’s what gets us through the day, innit, the stories we tell ourselves.

I was already broken up into so many fragments that night that I don’t even know who it is staring back at me in the mirror. Who is the woman people cheer for at signings in bookshops? Who is the lonely girl wandering in every Waterstones in Birmingham and London, a family member always nearby? Who was the young heart that was shredded to pieces and only recently glued together by rum rather than whiskey?

It’s a question I ask myself again now, looking down with a wistful smile. 

A blank page. Empty. Adjustable. Without personality. Whatever you want it to be and can give life to from your inner world.

Outside, the sound of shuffling feet goes accompanied by groaning, curses, low grumbles, and the creaking of wood. Somewhere in the distance a fight breaks out between two men, their voices too dim to make out the topic nor arguments of their heated debate. 

Although it isn’t my writing room with a desk by the window, this London hideout has become my personal bubble too. Alfie offered me to use his office whenever I want to, regardless of him being at work or not. Nonetheless, as during those holidays in Margate, he still prefers me to work on my books in his company on his rare day off. After all, despite the fact I’m, in his words, “off the fucking menu”, he trusts no one in his pack to not try their luck with me.

What a story that would be. A werewolf lower in rank trying to shack a Shelby witch, breaking the alpha’s rule. The alpha would go ballistic and a fight would break out.

Blood would flow.

The end is someone's death.

Fortunately, the rozzers in this part of town are in Alfie’s pocket because I don’t know how I’d save him from a charge for murder without my family’s help. Even then it’s highly unlikely he’d get away with it since no one wants him to live as desperately as I do.

“That ain’t writin’.” Alfie steps into the office, closing the door behind him. It falls into the lock with a soft click.

“No, indeed it isn’t.” I thumb the deck of cards in my hands. “Dad goes ballistic every time he catches me. If I don’t remind him of Mum, it’s this. Charlie’s different, though. He gave me these for my birthday and covers me as much as he can. He knows they’re important to me.”

“Funny, Tom going fucking angry at gyppo stuff.” He scoffs, sitting down in one of the chairs in front of his desk. “His anger is un-fucking-justified. Yes, you look like your mum, but that ain’t your fault. Besides, you’re… never mind. You don’t need to hear that.”

Maybe not right now, but still… one day I want you to say it again.

If only to hear I’m a beautiful person to someone.

To him.

I cock an eyebrow and scrunch my nose. For both our sakes, I ignore the unfinished remark. “Westminster changed him. We’re no longer gipsies. Looks like we’re fucking above that.”

“Not you, though,” Alfie says, a silent hint for me to continue in his soft-spoken voice.

I sigh. “Not me. I’d rather be a witch and honour my roots than become a toff settled in a mansion.”

“Got the itch to travel, eh?”

“Always. I remember what you promised me.” Throat constricted with solemn nostalgia, I swallow and fail to muster even a sliver of a smile. “But then again, I was just a girl back then. Stupid I believed you.”

Alfie opens and closes his mouth, but settles for a groan. He leans in and places a big warm palm over my fumbling fingers. A crown to protect the queen’s hand. “The road is open. I couldn’t take you then, right, I’m very well aware of that, but we can still go.”

“Despite who I am?”

“You’re not a fucking Shelby. Freedom is a ‘uman right, but not every ‘uman gets to enjoy it. I wanna open the cage, see where the little bird goes.”

And will the wolf follow? Or will he get someone else to free him from the Tower?

I bite my lip, gaze averted to our hands. 

Alfie clears his throat and leans back. The rings on his fingers shimmer in the artificial light when he lets his entwined fingers rest on his stomach. “Self-taught?”

“Polly taught me. Well, the basics. I developed my skills further myself.” I tilt my head, our eyes locked while an idea pops into my head. “I’m no expert, but… can I do a reading on you?”

He silently gestures at his desk, giving permission.

“I’ll do a simple spread. Three cards. Past. Present. Future.”

Hopefully, the cards will reveal what you and Thomas swept under the carpet.

I shuffle the deck, focusing on the question of what happened a decade ago. If there’s anything I want and need to know about the pack leader’s history, it’s this small piece we have in common. 

The crossroads between our stories.

I draw the first card, presenting the past. 

Ten of Swords.

The second card, the present. 

Six of Cups.

The third and final card, the future. 

The Chariot.

My stomach drops at the sight of the wolf pierced by swords. “Something failed, a defeat that led to some sort of collapse. But it wasn’t a part of your business that failed, was it?” 

I furrow my brow, pondering what could have happened. However, not a second has passed before I flinch and a vision flashes behind my eyes. 

Growling. Blood. Organs. Alfie clenching his fists and holding his head while his skin ripples. Empty and broken bottles of rum. The nauseating noise of bones cracking resonates in my ears while skin replaces fur and vice versa in quick succession. 

“It was a collapse of self. You took to the bottle, more and more, to drawn out the feeling of having failed. Changed more often until…” my breath hitches and I snap my head up to meet his gaze, still panting lightly. His expression is stoic, his sentiments concealed. “You went feral.”

So that’s why Camden was quiet, but Ollie was always tense. Poor sod, being left in command without warning.

I compose myself as best as possible and continue. “The present, Six of Cups. This world is still strange to you, but slowly you’re getting familiar with it again. How… how much do you remember?”

“Only you. Me fuckin’ noggin’ is a mess, one black hole.’’ Tenderness illuminates his eyes, warming the blue sea and icy lake in them. ‘‘But I, I swear, right, I’ve never forgotten you. You were there, even in the midst of the worst frenzy.”

I shake my head, desperate to stop him before we go down a familiar road. Before I start hoping for an ideal. “Don’t tell me you came back because of me.”

“You, yeah, you told me you wondered whether or not I’d come back. So,’’ he spreads his hands for a moment and then puts them down again, ‘‘ere I am.”

I mean, you’re not wrong. I did say that, but that was last month.

When I slipped out of my room just to get a glimpse of him before going to bed, feeling like a little kid again, rebellious enough to defy the rules. I ended up sitting at his bed for longer than I intended. To be honest, I had to kick myself out of the guestroom lest I ended up sleeping next to him, which would have worsened the already precarious situation with Thomas.

“I thought you were asleep.”

“Drunk, yes. But not asleep. I forced myself to stay awake, to enjoy every second of your company.” He bites his lip, failing to sound any less direct. “Not a moment went by I didn’t want to go ‘ome. But I ‘ad no one to guide me there.”

“Your guide didn’t know where to look. Lost herself in a terrible dark forest,” I murmur. “Must be strange, though, being back after so many years. Camden has changed.”

“It ‘as, but I still remember the way around me kingdom. Seems even the new faces know who sits on the throne.” He looks down at his hands and rest of his body. “Odd, innit, clothes and what we use them for? Feels unnatural, not like what Yahweh had planned for us to be wearin’ when ‘e made us. Didn’t want to give you a fright, though. Lots of new scars that ‘aven’t ‘ealed yet or barely. Yeah… would only stress you out. I do apologise for me manners, though, the way I ate that sandwich. One eats differently... out there. Besides, being blind on one side ‘as its complications.”

“You were a messy eater even before you left.” I can’t suppress a smile at a particular memory. “I always had to help you wipe crumbs from your beard whenever we went out to lunch. D’you remember that?”

“Can’t say it sounds strange to me ears.” His brow furrows and he flinches, fingertips pressed to his temple. Between shallow breaths sounds a note of delighted relief. “I think such a memory just returned.”

“You’ll get there.”

It’s better to remember something rather than nothing at all.

“Doc told me the best way to sort out the fuckin’ mess up there is to visit the places I’ve been. Said it could form a trigger.”

I shift in my seat. Regardless of being an adult, Thomas still likes to keep a close eye on me. And if it isn’t him, he’ll send another watchdog. Knowing him, it’s highly likely he’ll send for Michael, who has pretty much figured me out over the years. That’s what you get when you spend too many Christmases at Polly’s. “I’ll have to find a way out of the cage to meet you.”

“I 'ave a key.”

“You do?”

Ignoring my question, Alfie nods at the three cards on the desk. “Last card. What does it mean?”

Blinking in surprise at the swift change in topic, I clear my throat and return my focus to the reading. “The Chariot. You’ll gain discipline and self control. You found a way to quell the rage inside or, rather, subdue the Wolf.”

“Guess the Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is paying off,” he chuckles.

“I thought you did boxing?”

“I did that before, you know, the whole leaving and feral thin’. Currently doin’ that.”

“It sounds less violent.”

“It is.”

“No cage fights?”

He shakes his head, a few strands of grey highlighted by the light. “No, love, no more cage fights. I can’t right remember, but I stopped participatin’ in those a long time ago. ‘Ell, I don’t even know anymore what they were like.”

“You were fearsome,” I say, hoping to spark a sliver of a memory which won’t contain the events that ended with fatal accidents. “Nothing could stop you in the ring.”

“What calmed me down?”

“A bath and a cup of tea.”

“Right after the fight, I mean.”

“They’d sent for me lest…”

“Lest what?” I avoid his gaze, which is clearly not appreciated. “Lest what, love?” he repeats, tone harsher and sharper.

I press my lips together, breathing in deeply. “Lest the wolf took completely over. The day it happened for the, fuck, I don’t even know how many times it had been. Four? Five? It might have been ten when I finally got through to you. And on that night, I made you promise to stop fighting.”

“Did I? Stop fightin’, I mean?”

I glance around the room, lost for how to answer. “I don’t know. You were proud of being a wolf, hell, the fucking alpha of Camden Town. It was the one thing you didn’t want to give up. Fighting was in your nature and I fear that it’s a part you wouldn’t give up. Not even for me.”

“I ‘ave now, yeah, I ‘ave now. No more fightin’, Y/N. I swear so on everything between this world and the next, every bloody grave I can think of.”

“Perhaps that abstinence from violence is where your success lies.”

Maybe temperance forms the key to self-control when it comes to us. Maybe we were poison to each other before, but what if we keep an eye on the dosage?

What if we can find our way back?

The door opens. Ollie remains in the doorway, expression pale. “Boss, Randy and Pete are nigh on having a shiv dance.”

“Fuckin’ ‘ell,” Alfie grumbles as he rises to his feet. “I’ll be there in a minute. Go on, off you fuck.”

“Yes, boss.” The second-in-command curtly nods at me, smiling politely. “Y/N, sorry for the intrusion.”

“It’s alright, Ollie. Thank you.”

“‘Ow about you stay ‘ere, hm?” Alfie proposes after his subordinate has closed the door. 

“How’d you mean? I don’t want to inconvenience-’’

“You’re not. And I don’t mean ‘ere as in this shithole of a basement with all these numpties. What I mean, right, is ‘ow about you stay ‘ere, at my side? Plus, I’ll be ‘onest, and you know I only am with you, it’s part of me plan to prove you’re not nor ‘ave ever been a Shelby.”

“Enlighten me,” I say to humour him yet harbouring no expectations for this to be anything more than a joke. ‘‘Tell me about this big plan of yours.’’

“A change of name.” Lost in thought, he strokes his beard. “Yeah… that oughta do it. Y/N Solomons has a nice ring to it, don’t it?”

Jaw clenched, I put the cards down to cross my arms. “Alfie, this isn’t funny.”

“I’m not being funny, Mrs Solomons. C’mon, stand up.” He walks around the desk and pulls me to my feet, his calloused palms warm against my skin. A strong whiff of oud wood and vanilla hits my nose when he leans in to rest his forehead against mine. “This old selfish chap means it. Marry me, eh?”

I run my fingers through his bushy whiskers, an old habit I can’t seem to quit. Sooner or later, this will turn out to be him pulling my leg. The words leaving my mouth are sceptic too, slow and hesitant as they roll off my tongue. “Are you mental?” 

“Perhaps, but I want to set you free. Show Tom he has a wonderful woman of a daughter who deserves the world, right, a world I want to try and give ‘er.” He removes one of his rings and the silver chain around his neck, making a necklace out of the pieces of jewellery. Then he reaches back to put it on me. The silver is lukewarm against my chest, having retained some of his natural heat. “I don’t need an answer right now. You don’t even need to love me in return. I simply wish to keep you safe, that which I couldn’t do the first time. But this time, yeah, this time I will. Swear so on every holy book in this whole damned world. ‘Sides, I had to pop the question at least once while I’m still ‘ere. While I still remember.”

My breath tapers, the butterflies violently trying to break out yet all congesting in my throat. Stuck in a net of fear. “I want to find our way back, I do. But marriage seems too big of a step to take.”

“You know me better than anyone else, love. Take your time to think about it, eh.’’ He lovingly strokes my cheek, softly purring. ‘‘I’ll wait. ‘Owever, if you reject my offer, at least use the name to be free. I’ll find you a place to stay either ‘ere in Camden or in Margate. A nice big apartment or an entire ‘ouse, whatever you fancy. Wherever you fancy, actually. So if you wanna go to, let’s say, France and mingle with fuckin’ baguettes, I’ll make it ‘appen.”

“Alfie…”

Before I can begin to protest, he shushes me by pressing his lips on mine. They’re still as soft and plush as I remember, tender yet full of restrained passion. Needing more of this, us, but sharing the hesitancy of chasing the ideal world we lived in for a single summer. 

After a moment he breaks away and kisses the tip of my nose. “I need to get back to work. Make sure these floors stay clean and those runts get a reminder of the bloody rules. Stay for as long as you like.”

I watch him leave the office, grown a little colder.

And aside from the dim shouting, growls, and Alfie putting the other wolves in place, there’s nothing.

Nothing except a racing, conflicted heart and an all too familiar companion.

Silence.

[totally-not-deacon]

WIP Wednesday, baby!

Tagged by @throughtrialbyfire!! Gonna tag some fresh meat I haven't gotten to yet: let's go with... @watchyourdigits @sassenashsworld aaaand @obscene-beans if ya wanna go.

So I'm at a point where there's a LOT of spoiler-y type stuff, so I had to root around a bit. Fortunately my brain refuses to write in order, so I have a fairly long little draft of a scene between Marasa and Inigo planned for a later chapter! Most'll be under the read more:

I’m sorry, I don’t speak ‘knuckle dragger’. Could you repeat that?” Marasa’s chair slammed into the wall behind her as she shot to her feet. If this son of a bitch thought he could pull that on her…

“Easy, now.” Inigo’s hand came to rest on her arm. She glared up at the now smug-looking Nord in question, before she let herself be pulled away. One more word.

“He’s just some drunk snowback, I could take him down, no problem!” She slurred, easily just as inebriated, while tugging futilely in his grasp. Inigo nodded to Lucien on the way out, sure he’d let the others know where they were off to. So maybe he had a plan in case this happened, even ready to rent rooms elsewhere. They weren’t going to tell her that, of course.

“While I am sure you could, and I might otherwise encourage putting a racist in his place, we are in Windhelm.” He walked them through the crowd and into the frigid night air. “Why don’t we visit that corner club instead, before we end up visiting a cell.”

She deflated, sagging against him. Her breath formed soft clouds in the cold night air. “I hate this city.”

“As do I, but we are only here for the night. These people are not worth sitting in jail over, believe me.” They wound through the ice-slicked alleys, working their way back to the Gray Quarter. Footsteps echoed off the ancient stone walls making up the city, cutting through the silence. He was right, he usually was. He nudged her through the door first, the burst of heat welcome on her chilled skin.

She wasn’t too keen on this Dunmeri alcohol, but she nursed her drink all the same. There wasn’t anything she could think of to say, so she remained silent and scowling at the tabletop.

“How are you doing?”

“I…” The question caught her off guard, eyes meeting his. Her mouth hung open. How was she doing? What she was doing, sure, maybe even why sometimes. She could answer those. But how… “I – I don’t know.”

“You have been through a lot recently. I do not blame you.”

Her frown deepened. How was he always so… understanding? It frustrated her to no end. Just... how did he do it? A tiny part of her wanted to reach out – to crawl from her own throat, thrashing and screaming to the world. She swallowed, feeling it growing.

“It’s just…” She should keep her mouth shut. “A year ago I was just another broke sellsword. Just another someone trying to run from themselves, right? I was alive, but that’s it. I just was. And I was okay with that, I think. But now…” Stop talking.

“Now, what?” He asked gently, encouraging her to finally begin to open up. He knew she needed to, it wasn’t healthy for anyone to bottle their emotions up so, and she was certainly an expert at it.

“I don’t –” She could feel her face heat up, her eyes begin to sting. It didn’t make any sense. Marasa buried her face in her hands. It was ungrateful, undeserving. She wanted it all at arm’s length and a tight embrace. Fingernails bit into her palms. “I don’t know what to do with it all!”

“All I’ve ever done is follow orders.” She continued, her mouth moving before she could think to stop it. “That’s all I’ve ever done – and now this? I’m supposed to be some kind of leader?An icon to a people that would rather see my kind slaughtered wholesale!”

They wanted her to be a hero.

She wasn’t. She never was. “I thought I was getting better. Or at least learning to ignore it…”

“And then…” Her voice wavered. The bite of shackles, the damp stone walls. She rubbed her wrists subconsciously, unable to actually say it aloud. The bruises may have faded, but the wounds inside still lay open and festering. She thought she was going to be sick. “And then everything came back.”

Inigo opened his mouth to respond, but she was on a roll. “But at the same time I have all of you. I have a house – an actual house! I’ve got friends…” More. She choked. “And I don’t feel like I earned a single bit of it.”

I shouldn’t even be here.

“My friend…”

Her voice lowered, alcohol blending the edges of the words together. “Half the reason I don’t go home, y’know. Did you know how proud my father was? When they shipped us off to Auridon… Did you know he congratulated me? Do I look like someone to be proud of? Look at me!”

“It feels like they wanted this, sometimes.” She hugged herself to the point it hurt. “They wanted a hero in the family more than a daughter.”

An arm wrapped around her shoulder, drawing her into a hug. She sighed, letting her head drop froward. “Sorry. Dunno where all that came from…”

“Do not be sorry. Every one deserves to have their voice heard.” Inigo assured her.

“Would you like to know what I see?” Marasa shrugged, no longer trusting her voice. She’d said enough already.

“I don’t see a hero.” Despite her own feelings of the term, it would still somehow sting from anyone else. “And I see that you are very scared. You are scared, and like a cornered animal – sometimes you lash out.”

“Way to cheer a girl up…” she mumbled.

“And I see someone still standing despite it all.” He continued. “I do not see a hero, but I do see a strong, courageous, and incredible friend.”

“So cheesy…” A small smile played on her face and she elbowed him in the side. She sniffed, quickly scrubbing at her eyes.

“No, that would be your pack after visiting the market this morning.”

[the-character-lounge]

Sing with me kiddo! Chin up~ Chin up~ Put a little laughter in your eyes! Brave it~ Save it~ Even though you're feeling otherwise! Pahahahahahaa! Isn't singing fun!~

Spinel has a PTSD panic attack

Randy kissed his cheek and giggled. “Al- Alright alright.. I w- won’t be all sm- smoozy with y- you… a- at least not for n- now.” He took one final sip of his coffee and placed the bits for all three cups down on the table before getting up. “W- Well, I figure w- we’ll have a couple hours t- to kill before listening i- in on the meeting. L- Let’s go back t- to your place and celebrate! I- I have a little s- something I’ve been w- wanting to give you!” He headed for the door, a light, confident bounce in his step.

"Uh, yes sir--" Spinel blurted timidly, then covered his mouth and froze a moment. He breathed, then shook it off and quickly followed after the ram, feeling disgusted with himself for that. Once outside he quickly forced himself back in to arrogance, tail flicking slightly. He still wasn't feeling all too well but feigned confidence and pride, forgetting the flower would be showing the immense discomfort that kept lingering and wrapping around all his thoughts. Even the good ones like feeling flattered started to trail back to Uncle Candy, and he was honestly just glad to be getting far away from that near lookalike for the time.

Randy blushed upon being called ‘sir,’ but pretended not to hear him. As they walked, he looked over at him, watching the flower’s colors share his true feelings. He looked curiously at Spinel, then back forward. “… wh- why are y- you feeling so e- embarrassed?” he asked, still looking forward with the phantom of a smile on his lips. “Ar- Aren’t you gl- glad I think you’re more th- than just a pretty f- face?” he chuckled and softly nudged him with his rump.

He glanced over with a flat and uninterested stare, head held high. "Of course I am but I don't see why you were so surprised at my 'genius'." He snorted and looked away a bit. "Seemed like the obvious thing to do." He shook a hoof off a little as he walked, "Ugh I touched him..."

He rolled his eyes and gave his neck a little lick. "Oh c- come on be n- nice. He is helping us.. Even if he doesn't know it." He smiled as they walk, stealing a few licks and kisses every now and then. He couldn't help being so affectionate, even thought the 'act' was over. He realized Spinel would probably get all grumpy at him eventually, so after on last shoulder kiss, he focused on walking instead of praising him silently with little affectionate gestures.

"Yeah well if he doesn't know, that just makes it more risky because he's a fucking idiot, Randy. An easily pushed around blabbermouth." The kisses and licks were a little flustering but they kept him able to continue feigning his confidence. But on the inside it felt like he was swimming in disgusting oatmeal smelling tar while he was gasping for whatever emotions he could to keep himself looking 'fine' otherwise.

Randy frowned a bit. "Hey.. Th- the poor guy doesn't know an- any better. I- If anything, he'd be j- just as horrified as a- any pony else who found out C- Candy was the s- sick bastard we kn- know him as." He looked at him with a hint of concern. The flower was now a raging storm of colors, most of which were colors that meant he was brooding about something. When they reached a street corner, he tried to wave a taxi down. As they waited, he looked at Spinel with a timid, worried look. ".. S- Something on y- your mind?"

"Oh don't start feeling sorry for him, he's what, in his 20s? And if he still doesn't know he's probably delivering drugs and fuck tokens to sick assholes who are using them on Celestia knows what then I hate to break your bubble, he's just a really big moron." He frowned, looking off. He felt a wave of sickness come over him suddenly but gulped it back, shuddering. And then he broke in to a pace at the question, snorting a few times through his nostrils. "I hate him. I hate him. I hate him more than any pony could ever understand. I fucking hate him. And I-" he made a dry heaving sound a moment, "I talked like him I-- I--"

Randy quickly trotted after him and circled around to stop him from going any further. "W- Woah woah e- easy..." He looked at Spinel, the concern on his face growing. "Th- That wasn't C- Candy you know... It was his brother. His naive br- brother who isn't purposefully t- trying to hurt any pony..." He gently put his hooves on Spinel's chest. "I kn- know that they m- must look similar... B- But they definitely aren't the same pony." He gently rubbed his chest and continued to stare at him with a worried look. "... L- Lets get a taxi and get y- you in a bath... Okay?"

"You don't know that...!" he said suddenly in a highly distressed voice, "I mean he has a fucking dog as a fiance so who the hell knows what things he's not saying...! For all we know that whole family could be secretly fucked up. We. Don't. Know." He wanted to start pacing again, but Randy was keeping him there so instead his two front legs continued to lift and fall. "Why couldn't it just be Candy? Why couldn't it just be that simple?!" He didn't know how to express why this was so distressing. The thought alone distressed him even further, because a moment he considered Sugar like a relative of his own only because he still felt-- He made another dry heave and began shaking, eyes losing clarity.

Randy watched him become reduced to a scared, anxious heap and he pulled him into a small hug. "H- Hey hey.. I- It's alright...."'he whispered. "... L- Look, now th- that S- Sugar's been bugged, we'll be able t- to find out if th- that's true.. If Sugar is m- messed up like his br- brother. B- But we c- can't let that worry us now. A- And even if h- he is.. It doesn't really m- matter does it? Wh- What matters is that we kick that b- bastard t- to the curb." He waved a taxi down, and helped Spinel inside. "L- Let's just... be pr- proud that we've scored an- another little victory over that stupid f- fucker whose fault th- this all really is.. Okay?" He softly rubbed his shoulder.

He nodded, keeping quiet as he sat down in the taxi. He leaned on Randy, eyes still not all there as one hoof snaked around blindly until it could find his hoof which was then squeezed tightly. Every passing moment he kept hearing more and more of that voice and laughter in his head, and as it grew in to a roaring hurricane in his mind it seemed to manifest suddenly in to something worse. He actually cried out, flinching badly as he quickly hid his face to Randy's neck.

Randy squeezed his hoof back softly, and gently nuzzles the top of his head. ".. Y- You're gonna b- be okay," he said in a soft voice. "I- I'm here, I- I'll protect y- you..." He softly shushed him, and continued to squeeze his hoof. "H- He won't hurt you a- again... N- Not as l- long as I'm h- here... Shhhh shh shh..." He pressed his lips to his forehead and reached around with his other hoof, pulling Spinel into a hug.

"He didn't-...." he choked out and trailed off, clinging on to the ram and not caring if they were in a taxi. Not until the taxi pony impatiently tried to check in with them to ask where they wanted to go, which was promptly greeted with a VERY angry Spinel who was yelling at the top of his voice at the driver, "Just shut the FUCK UP and drive your ass to Polished Dreams and MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS ASSHOLE!"

Randy softly pulled him back into the hug, and looked at the driver, afraid he'd kick them out. "Pl.. Please... Just drive o- okay? I'll d- double the f- fare if you c- can get us there in l- less than five...." He returned his attention on Spinel, and let go of his hoof so he could full on hug him, stroking his back and softly rocking him. A few bars at a time, he hummed their lullaby, still rubbing his back, and pressing his cheek to the side of his neck.

Spinel was trembling between rage and disgust. At first, the hugging didn't seem to help. It just made that horrible sick feeling worse and he could swear he was drowning helplessly in completely different arms at the time, but even still clinging. The humming was the only thing that made him realize this wasn't true, and he began to gulp in air and let it out heavily, slower and slower until his breathing was finally able to settle. He spoke weakly, "I... tried... I couldn't do it... I tried..."

He didn't know what Spinel meant by that, and he kept rocking him softly. ".. All th- that matters i- is that you tr- tried your best.." He softly kissed his forehead once, before keeping him in a tight embrace. The taxi pulled up in front of the store, and he softly loosened up the hug. "W- We're here," he whispered softly.

Spinel nodded, gulping heavily and breathing in deep one more time as he let his features melt in to indifference as he walked out. Of course inside he was still seething, but he didn't want other ponies seeing him like this. Thinking that, it surprised him, because he realized he had one exception where he once had none. He glanced at Randy for a long time before he started to walk to the side elevator.

Randy paid the taxi nearly triple instead of double, as an added tip. "Th- Thank you," he said as he followed Spinel to the elevator. Randy softly leaned on him as they waited, his hoof blindly searching for and grabbing hold of Spinel's hoof. He gave it a small squeeze, and stepped into the elevator with him when it arrived. He kept holding his hoof all the way to the suite floor, and even when they reached the door.

Spinel kept eerily silent and stoic the whole way, slowly walking to the suite and not even giving the guard so much as a glance as he let the two of them inside. The moment the door shut though, he collapsed to the floor and started hitting his free hoof on it over and over in anger and pain, biting back tears and making strained noises. He hated this. He completely hated this. He was being so weak and such a huge disappointment and all after he made such a big effort to do a good job. Randy taking care of him like this was so humiliating and even moreso because he was clinging to him for it.

Randy sat on the floor next to him, and softly rubbed his back with his free hoof. "... You d- did good today," he said softly, once Spinel had stopped hitting the floor. ".. Y- You should b- be proud." He let go of Spinel's hoof so he could wrap his foreleg around his shoulder. ".. I- I am... Pr- proud of y- you that is." He hugged Spinel from the side and stared at him. "... Y- You want me to g- go draw up a b- bath? ... M- Maybe order us some o- of that ch- chow mien too?" He asked with a soft, calming voice. "O- Or I c- can maybe dr- drop by the c- cake store Wh- while you take your b- bath... P- pick s- something up for y- you..."

"Bath..." he nodded, unable to get many words out. He took some heavy shaking breaths, "Not...not hungry... Don't go..." He managed to pull himself up so he could stand again, staring at the floor. He started laughing suddenly.

He got up also, and softly stroked his shoulder. "... I- I'll go get it st- started..." He said in a hushed voice, looking concerned about the sudden outburst of laughter. He went to the bathroom and began drawing water from the faucet, testing it and letting it run so it could get nice and warm before he plugged the tub. After that he stayed knelt by the tubside, just staring at the water and playing with it quietly.

He continued to laugh for a while, nodding again and again at Randy's voice. He had no control of himself. It was horrifying and suffocating and he just wanted things to be normal. He took off what he was wearing and tossed it on a couch, looking around at the suite that now looked strange to him. He let his eyes wander over every detail, re-familiarizing himself with it, reminding himself that all of this belonged to him. That he earned it. That he wasn't what he once had been, that he was far better than anything Candy could have made him. And on top of that, he was the one to tear down Osiris. He already won. This was just stomping out the last cinder. Easy. Easy. He finally found his comfort and went to the bath, taking the flower and putting it on the sink counter. He nuzzled his nose to Randy's mane and took in his scent a moment before stepping in to the tub and sitting. He stared at Randy timidly for a while in silence, then cracked a smile. "Grab me a bath bomb...?"

Randy nodded, a complacent look on his face. "Wh- Where are they?" he asked, his hoof still playing with the water. The laughter had really.. Offset him.

He pointed, "The gold basket behind you, just toss one in, any kind. Not the pink one though, that's uh... That kind that I use..." he cleared his throat and looked away a moment. He looked back, smile getting a little wider, but somehow more broken. "I'm going to be okay."

[saturdaynightghostclub]

Highway Hypnosis

Chapter 8: Babel

In the gap between Is and Was, there exists the liminality of a thousand uninhabited years. It’s the fall to the Underworld that takes somewhere between ten minutes and seven days, depending on who you ask. Len Is, then Len Was. I Was, now I Am. Stuck between projector slides, trapped in an elevator with the doors half-open. With every shelf I dust, my uncle slips further from Is, and I settle slowly into Am. He’s in a deep, veiled past now. If he speaks, it will be in a tongue I’ve never heard; our tower is crumbling with each day that I work to erase his footprint from the home he gave me. This is the best way I’ve found to describe the feeling of living without him, in his shell: it’s less that he’s gone, and more that there’s an irreconcilable language barrier that now separates us.

Jasper’s been in the library more often than not, dusting shelves and trying to decipher the complex organizational system Len set up. When I suggested that we just alphabetize everything by last name, he recoiled as if I’d invoked Satan in mass. Apparently Len was very particular about the order of the books, which to the untrained eye appears to be roughly genre-based with subcategories I can’t even begin to comprehend. He’s in there again today, kicking up dust and surgically removing and replacing books in the exact order in which he found them while I shove furniture around to get at the rugs underneath. I’ve been trying to wash them, to give them new life since Len’s ancient vacuum cleaner doesn’t seem to be doing the job. Mostly though, I’ve been hanging them over the porch railings to beat the ever-loving daylights out of them with a broom. I’m not sure what exactly I’m accomplishing, but it feels good to use my arms for something other than making coffee.

With each strike, I can feel myself getting lighter. It’s a funny thing to be aware of, the cognitive weight of oneself. When Jasper kissed me the other day (a performance he has yet to repeat, which may have something to do with my abuse of the rugs), I thought I would feel lighter; I thought, when you finally kissed the one person you were always meant to be kissing, you’d walk on air. Instead, I felt completely and beautifully heavy. Not heavy, exactly—grounded, maybe. I settled entirely into myself, solidifying like sand into glass. I was there, fully, inside my body inside his arms inside the cracked dome of the Evergreen sky. He hasn’t kissed me again, and we haven’t talked about it. And I feel like I’m floating.

Strike. Strike. Strike.

“Andie!” Jasper calls from inside the house.

“Coming,” I reply, dropping my broom unceremoniously on the porch before heading in. I round the corner and enter the library to see him standing in the center of the room, holding a small white envelope.

“For you,” he says, holding it out. On the back, in Len’s distinct chicken scratch, is my name. It certainly is for me.

“Where’d you find it?” I ask, trying against instinct to keep the shudder from my voice as I take it from him.

“Top shelf, right-hand side. It was on top of the books, I never would have noticed it,” he says, shifting his weight. “Do you want to open it? I can leave, or—,”

“No, stay,” I say reflexively, “I’m sure it’s nothing heavy.”

Jasper nods. I’m not lying; the envelope is old, covered in dust. If it was anything important, he would have written it recently. That’s what I assume, anyway. It never was any good, trying to read Len.

To my beloved Andie,

I’m sorry, my dear. In lieu of me showing up for you, please accept these books as a peace offering—if you’re still the little girl I raised, I know you’ll love them.

PZ7.R1975 Wh 2017

PZ7.B1135 Tu

PR4567 .A1 1996

Love,

Your uncle Len.

I’m lost. I hand the note to Jasper with a quirked eyebrow, a silent “What do you think?” passing between us. The codes on the page mean nothing to me aside from the fact that they clearly correspond to books in some way.

Jasper’s expression mirrors mine as he takes the note, but morphs into something else entirely as he reads. “Library of Congress,” he murmurs.

“Catch me up,” I say, crossing to stand beside him. So I can look at the note, sure, but what if my shoulder presses against his just so—what then?

He doesn’t notice. “These are Library of Congress call numbers. The letters correspond to subjects and it narrows down from there, see? That must be how he’s organized the books…” he trails off, turning away from me to run a finger along a row of spines along the back wall. “Jesus, of course he would—I don’t even know where to start here.”

“Google, maybe?” I say, pressing a light hand to his back to alert him of my presence before I pluck the note from his hand. I whip my phone out of my pocket—the poor thing barely gets any use since I arrived here—and set to work translating the call numbers to usable titles.

“Let me know when you get a hit, I’ll pull it,” Jasper says. He’s in mission mode. It’s adorable; he should have inherited the library instead of me.

“Okay, the first is—,” I start, squinting at my phone in my stubbornness against wearing glasses, “Where the Red Fern Grows.”

“Got it,” he whirls around, scanning a shelf seemingly at random before pulling a small volume.

“Next one,” I say, furiously typing, “Tuck Everlasting.”

Jasper moves back a few volumes, tapping each one as he passes it. “Done,” he says.

“Okay, last one…Oliver Twist,” I say, sliding my phone back into my pocket triumphantly.

“And…got it!” Says Jasper, pulling a particularly dusty book from a shelf I don’t have a prayer of reaching on my own. He turns to me with a boyish grin, like he’s solved the great mystery of the world by virtue of random library knowledge. I make a mental note of his image, smiling to myself. He passes the stack of books to me, watching me closely for my reaction.

“Huh,” I murmur, examining their cracked spines as I turn them over in my hands, “Wonder what made him choose these.”

“Troublemakers,” he says, “they’re all about kids running around, getting into shit. Sound familiar?”

I laugh, genuinely, and maybe for the first time in a while. “Fair enough,” I grin. Len spoke through him, just now. In my language.

The library mystery solved, Jasper and I take up residence on the beat-down porch of the cabin. Len never bothered with patio furniture, preferring to sprawl out on the splintering wood, so that’s what we do. We’re unnecessarily close on the porch steps, but I won’t acknowledge it if he doesn’t. How juvenile of us both.

“I didn’t think I was going to kiss you the other day,” he says, breaching the uneasy silence, “just so you know. I didn’t know I was going to do it until it was happening.”

So he does want to talk about it. “Do you regret it?” I ask, before I can think better of it.

“No,” he breathes in a near-gasp, turning swiftly to look at me. “Not even for a second, no.”

“Neither do I,” I say, bumping his shoulder lightly with my own. He didn’t ask, but he needs to hear it. Maybe I need to hear it too. He exhales beside me, confirming my suspicion: he was testing the waters. Now it’s my turn. I press forward, just an inch or two—as subtle as to be negligible, unless he’s looking for it. Now, a hand on his knee—the one furthest from me, so that I’m crossing his body with my arm. He understands.

Jasper tilts my face up to his with a finger beneath my chin and kisses me, with the same blissful softness he used before. I don’t think I’ve ever met a gentler man, one whose basic instinct was less “conquer” and more “find out.” I can feel his smile against my lips in the moment before he pulls away, and I answer it with one of my own.

“I can’t believe my luck, honestly,” he says, briefly pressing his forehead to my own before turning back to the horizon.

“What do you mean?”

“Just this. All of it. The fact that you’re here, one of the three transplants we’ve had in five years, and you’re beautiful and smart and charming, and you just happen to be into me. What are the odds?”

I press a kiss to his shoulder. “Better than you might think. You’d be surprised, there’s a real market for bookish introverts like you in college towns. You wouldn’t last three weeks as a single man where I come from.”

“I would,” he insists, “as long as you’re somewhere out there, I don’t stand a chance.”

[monsterfloofs]

Hello, if you are taking requests, could you do one with a holiday gift exchange with Teddy (Thaddeus) and reader, please? Thank you! Happy Holiday and New Year to you, may all your days be gentle and bright!

Thaddeus (Male Vampire) x Anonymous Reader (Sfw)

A Holiday Edition:

(Hello there! Sorry it took me so long to get back to your request! I took a holiday break from writing to do some personal art things and spend time with the family. So this is a belated response, I also had to do some background lore/world work to figure out the best way to write this! —And uh, er, this got WAY too long!!! But uhhhhh also, Teddy is a favorite and I would live in Wroughtworth if I only could. So he gets paragraphs of story because he is a precious plum. Q-QQ ) Unedited for the most part, so there are probably mistakes abound! Sowwy in advance. u n u;; ) I also hope you had a lovely holiday and new years too! )

The dark streets and looming buildings were covered in thick blankets of snow, turning the usually dark and dreary structures into a cozy and picturesque winter holiday. It was almost like stepping into a black and white photograph in the day time, and at night the snow reflected a blue midnight color that pooled into the streets and plazas.

More snow was coming, you had heard, peering out the window to watch big fluffy flakes stick to high gothic windows. You pulled a knit blanket closer to you, staring outside into the sapphire twilight.

“Tell me about this. . . gift exchange again dear?”

“It’s something we do back home,” You admitted, careful to keep out the ties of religious holidays. After all. . . you thought it wouldn’t exactly be the best of ideas to bring them up, while religions in the past had called vampires, demons and evil spirits. Finding and devising ways to harm and deter them.

“Hm. . . I suppose that would give us something to do while we are trapped inside from all this snow.” Teddy makes a face, scrunching his nose as his eyebrows knit together. “But you did say it was an exchange, that also means that I must find you a gift as well.”

Your reflection gives an awkward smile, well. . . he didn’t really have to. But you knew Teddy, he would have insisted that he have to give you something in return if you had surprised him with a present. You look back at him, his fingers steepled together in thought as the candle lit made his eyes dance and glitter.

What was that look for?

“What are you planning?” You asked suspiciously, he holds his hands up and grins. “Moi? Why— nothing, nothing!” You squint at him before slowly sinking back down to sit properly on the couch.

You didn’t believe that for a second.

“And when did you want to have this little festivity hm?”

He sounded eager, which had you taken aback. “Oh. . . whenever I suppose you want to. . .”

“Splendid,” He responds with a sudden cheerfulness, starting to rise from his seat. “Then I shall see you again within an hour or so!”

“Ah—“ You began as you watched him grab his hat, scarf, and coat.

“Teddy— th- the storm? There’s a winter storm outside—“

Thaddeus pauses on the threshold from the living room to the stairs and the doors leading outside. He grins playfully.

“Oh, sweetheart. Don’t you worry about me, I have weathered worse blizzards than this on my adventures.”

Your lips purse, “Alright. . .” taking a pause before murmuring slowly, “Please be safe,”

He tips his hat before he disappears around the corner, the door opening and closing with a heavy thud.

You sink deeper into the pillows and blankets. Well! Now you have about an hour or so to worry about what your companion was up to! You sigh and swing your legs off of the couch, your socks shuffling across the candle lit room to grab a lantern.

“Come on Pip,” A rustling sound comes from another blanket pile as a little skeletal beak pokes out from its cocoon.

“You want to come wrap Teddy’s present with me?” A couple clicks from the beak in response before a shadow streams from the blanket and darts onto the floor. Pip appears on your shoulder, shaking their head back and forth as they snuggle into your neck. Brrrrrrrrr!

“It is chilly out here,” You agree as you step out into the hallway and start to climb the stairs. “We won’t be up here too long, I promise.”

The long climb to the top has you huffing softly, it was cold up in your studio, but it would have been colder still if the large black bricked buildings weren’t designed so intricately. You stop to catch your breath at the top, before entering the small room crammed with tools and art supplies.

Raising your lantern to give one final look over the painting on the easel. All those sketches of Teddy you made in your journal had paid off in the end. The portrait you had been working so hard to make over winter was finished. As finished as you had anticipated it being, a part of you felt that you could have done hours of work more if you really wanted to. This was to be your biggest gift although you had a few others that you had bought prior. You had hid the other presents just enough out of sight, but in places you knew where to look. Digging around in a drawer to pull out a couple of carefully wrapped parcels. A few of the books he loves so dearly, you had found and bought on the spot. . . And had gotten a number of strange looks as you handed over your coin. You stacked them in your arms before carefully picking up the painting.

You had. . . one other gift as well, though, this one wasn’t tangible like paintings or books. It was a confession, a true confession of love, the one you hadn’t been able to verbally express as your tongue had curled in knots. A part of you wondered if he already knew.

After he had seen the pictures you had drawn, there was a slight change to the air about him. He talked to you the same, but there was something funny, a little crease to the corners of his eyes. The way his hands would linger with yours for just a moment longer. Silent spaces with unsaid words. Or perhaps you had only begun to take more interest in the little things he did, now that you had been so close to letting your heart bleed onto your sleeve.

You tiptoed carefully back down the stairs, balancing books and painting as you walked. Pip peeped in your ear and you peek over the railing. “He said an hour Pip, surely he can’t be back already. Can you watch the door for me?”

With a snap of their beak Pip became a little blotchy shadow that fell upon the stair, darting down, down, down back to the doorway. It took you much longer to arrive at the bottom, and you cooed praises at the little robed bird sitting patiently in front of the door. Watching it with fierce determination.

You were able to wrap up your painting in a brown paper that crinkled invitingly under your fingers. You knelt on the floor, hunched over it as you folded the long leafy sides of paper over top of your handiwork and wrapped it with twine. You sat back with a triumphant huff, letting yourself rest for a spell before you reach for the large parcel and prop it against the coffee table.

And now you wait. . . Pip had rejoined you on the couch when you called to them, a little liquid shadow that shot up the side of the bed and back into the nest of blankets. You laughed at the little shadowy feet that kicked and flailed before disappearing.

By the time Thaddeus had returned you had stoked a fire in the hearth, sitting on top of the warming stone fireplace and listening to the pops of smoldering wood. The door opening had caused you to turn your head, dusting your hands off and hurrying to the entrance.

“Teddy— Oh!”

Thaddeus looked like he had only just escaped from being buried in a snow drift, his dark clothes lined with snow. You reach up to attempt to help him brush off his shoulders.

“A frigid night!” He beamed cheerfully, “How lucky I am to not feel the cold!”

“If you were out there any longer I think you would have resembled a snowman,” You teased, flecks of snow melting against your fingers and chilling them.

“Wouldn’t that be a marvelous idea? A snowman in front of my house. How about you and I go out tomorrow and make one?”

“People would have a fit!” You gawked and Thaddeus grinned, “They would, wouldn’t they? I bet Fairaway’s hair would turn white.” He chuckles at the mention of the head guard of the city and you looked slightly uneasy. “You probably shouldn’t provoke him. . .”

Thaddeus huffs, “Provoke. . . ? My dear that creature has an ill temper to begin with. I think the people around here are so old they’ve forgotten what fun is!”

You smile, taking his frigid hands into yours, leading him into the warm living room as he continues to complain.

“No more playing about snow for tonight at least,” Thaddeus amended as he sat back into his favorite chair by the fire. “I won’t make any promises about tomorrow however.” He winks at you and you laugh softly. “I don’t think I could stop you if I tried.”

Thaddeus raises inquisitive eyebrows, “Oh, I am sure you would be able to sway me into behaving,”

You blink at the comment, “Maybe what I have for you might sway you then!” Thaddeus chuckles, before peering over at the large package by the coffee table. “M-my goodness, what pray tell is that??”

You hand him the smaller packages, “Open these ones first! Save the big one for last!” Thaddeus blinks before giving you a dubious look. “I thought we were only exchanging one gift.”

You shrug with a smile, “I go overboard with gift giving, it’s a bad habit of mine.”

Thaddeus hums mischievously, reaching into his breast pocket. “You and I had the same mind I see. Though mine are a lot smaller presents I’m afraid.” He produces a few small wrapped pieces, pressing them into your palm.

You look at the tiny wrapped treasures and swallow. “. . . You go first.”

Thaddeus wears a bemused smile as he turns the parcels over in his hands. “Well. . . by first inspection they feel like books—“

“Open them!” You chirrup with a laugh, “You won’t find out unless you open them!”

Thaddeus pulls a cheeky grin, as he gently shakes them beside one of his tapered ears. Then laughs as he watches you pull a face.

“Alright, I’ve had my fun!” He giggles faintly, before beginning to open the paper. His eyes widening as he quirks a lopsided smile. “Ah! Did you really?”

He continues to pull back the binding pressing a hand to his mouth, “And these were the ones I was missing too! Ah! How thoughtful of you!” He thumbs over the binding and gives you a grin. “You didn’t read them, perchance?”

You shake your head and wave your arms. “Nuh uh!! I got them used! I definitely was not reading your pervy books!” Thaddeus gives a goofy smile, and you sweat, your voice raising. “I did NOT!” you intone, and he cackles.

“I got weird looks from just buying them!! I was too scared to look!”

“They’re really not that bad,” Thaddeus chuckles, “I am sure the couples around here get into much worse than the occupants of these books.” You shout another complaint making Thaddeus laugh again.

You pout and thumb at your own small parcels, trying to hide the contagious smile that was spreading across your face.

“Go on,” Thaddeus prompts, resting his hand upon his cheek and watching you expectantly. “I was. . . debating on buying these for you. . . for a while now. I wasn’t sure if it was appropriate, so I held off on them.”

“That makes me nervous,” You laugh, your fingers fiddling with the tissue paper bundles.

“Now I see why you were so impatient,” Thaddeus huffs, “The suspense is killing me!”

You stick out your tongue playfully before you push yourself to unwrap the paper. Two tiny metal work bats, with delicate and ornate detailing but sat heavy in your palm.

A wisp of a smile tugs at Teddy’s lips. “One is a brooch, and it is inscribed with my house seal. Pin that on your coat, so that no matter where you go darling, everyone will know that your home is here. And, it’s a reminder for you as well, whenever you may feel lost or unwelcome. You are always welcome here.”

Your mouth dries, turning over the brooch to look at it, taking in the details of the tiny glittering jeweled eyes, and the loop of beads that dangled from its wings.

“I-I. . . I don’t know what to say. . . th-thank you Thaddeus.”

Thaddeus flashes a quick smile, before clearing his throat, “The necklace doesn’t have as deep a meaning as the brooch. I had thought that perhaps, it would look handsome on you. You do enjoy your bat motifs, if I recall, and the city is full of that.” He laughs nervously, his unhindered hand flexing against the arm of the couch.

You felt your heartbeat a thick tattoo into your throat. “C-can you help me put it on?”

It takes Teddy a moment to stirr, his eyes darting away for a moment before he gets to his feet. “Why. . . of course darling.”

You stand with your back to him, as cold hands gently reach around your neck. His fingers fiddling with the clasp. He steps back with a little hurriedness in his stride, but beams as you turn around. “Ah yes, as expected, it suits you very well.”

You smile and shuffle your feet. “Thank you Teddy, these are beautiful. . .” You reach for the last gift, lifting it up and handing it to him.

“You’ve out done me,” He teases, “I shall have to go out into the snow and find you another gift!” You smile and shake your head, “Oh no. . . I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, so this is technically a thank you gift for letting me haunt your home.

Thaddeus scoffs as he begins to open the package. “As I have said dear I don’t mind—“ He stops mid-sentence, staring down at the painting. “I. . . O-oh my.”

You smile, shoulders shrugging up as you meekly back away towards the hearth. “It’s something I have been working on for weeks. All those sketches you saw, I was afraid it was going to ruin the surprise.” He sits down heavily, eyes still drawn to the portrait. “I think. . .” He mused faintly, “You’ve made me too handsome.”

You twitter with awkward laughter, “O-oh no! Not at all! That’s exactly how I see you.” You bit your lip, staring at your socks and curling your toes. “It’s the best painting I have ever done, actually. B-because. . . I have a lot of love and tenderness for you. You are. . . more than just a dear friend to me. M-much, much, more. Just being around you. . . makes me feel like. . .” You trail off, shaking your head and laughing. “I don’t know. . . you make me feel like, the best way I can put it is, a somebody. Somebody capable of doing things, and being things, when normally I just feel lost. A-and. . . I. . .” Your eyelids flutter closed, fist closing around the little bat that sat against your collar. “I love you.” You take a deep breath, “I love you, a lot. Your friendship is so very dear to me, and I don’t want to ruin what is between us. Honestly, I am scared that I am ruining what is between us at this very moment.”

Another breath.

“But I wanted you to know. . . just how happy you make me feel. When you’re around. Your wit and your charm, your sense of humor and your smile.”

You tense as you feel a chilly thumb press against your lips. With your eyes closed you hadn’t heard him move, too caught up in trying to keep up with the words that were flowing from your mouth.

“There are lots of things that I adore about you too.” Thaddeus muses, you twitch in surprise at just how close his voice sounded in your proximity. “Your joy, your mind,” Thaddeus’ voice laughs softly, “You make me laugh, more than I think I have around anyone else. You’re like seeing the sun again, when you smile. You’re sunshine in a bottle my dear, you brighten every crevice of this house with your presence.” You tremble as he cups your cheek.

“. . . I would. . . very much like to kiss you, if you would allow me the pleasure.”