#i would pirate the films but i own them all already

[strangertheories]

just end the scream franchise now

[annes-andromeda]

Wish Rewrite

I have this tendency for rewriting material I either don’t like or think had wasted potential. At the time of writing this, Wish hasn’t come out in theaters but I did pirate it as there was an early screening. I also read the junior novelization and bought the concept art book. Needless to say, I was disappointed by what I read/saw.

I feel like Wish could’ve been better. Granted, the story and characters are not terrible, but they certainly leave much to be desired. This is literally Disney’s 100th anniversary, yet it doesn’t really feel like it. Not only that, but the movie felt incredibly rushed. Yeah I know that most Disney movies try have a run time of 90-100+ minutes, but I think a few more minutes could’ve been added to this film.

So, I decided to indulge myself and outline some changes that I think could’ve made the story slightly better. These ideas are by no means perfect, and in the end, this is all in good fun.

Spoilers ahead btw

The main story of Wish is essentially that Asha wants to get a job as Magnifico’s apprentice so that her grandfather’s wish is granted. But Asha finds out about the King’s true nature, and after questioning him, doesn’t get the job, and Magnifico vows to never grant Sabino or Sakina’s wishes.

Asha makes a wish on a star, and the star comes down, Magnifico tries to hunt down the two of them, he uses an evil spell book to create a staff, Magnifico destroys some wishes, Asha gets help from her friends, they sing a song to defeat Magnifico (I ‘wish’ i was joking), Star gives Asha a magic wand, and all is well.

Oh, and Amaya is… there.

It’s nothing complex, pretty cut and dry. And I don’t have a problem with a simple story! But this feels like it’s… missing something.

Firstly, I’d change the title. Disney already has a boat called Wish, and not every movie needs to be one word like Tangled, Frozen, and Brave (amongst others), so the story could be renamed “Asha and the Wishing Star” or “Asha and the Kingdom of Wishes”. Idk, something that evokes a classic fairytale book feel (or that does confuse people with a boat).

((Side note #1: I honestly enjoy that the story started off with a book, as a nod to classic disney movies, especially Snow White. That was cute))

Secondly, and I know I sound like a broken record at this point…

AMAYA👏🏼SHOULDVE👏🏼BEEN👏🏼A👏🏼VILLAIN👏🏼ALONGSIDE👏🏼HER👏🏼HUSBAND👏🏼

The original plan, according to the concept art book, was to have Magnifico and Amaya to be a villain couple who were partners in crime and owned a black sphinx cat named Charo. However for… reasons, the creators took the ‘safe’ route and made Amaya the good one out of the two.

But the problem is, by erasing Amaya’s evilness, the creators of Wish essentially removed any purpose or personality she may have had and thus, she was left to become a literal ‘supporting’ character. First supporting both Magnifico and Asha, then leaving Magnifico to prop up solely Asha.

Deadass, you can literally remove Amaya from the story and nothing would change. Which is probably why she was exempt from much of the promotional stuff minus the dolls. Because she literally serves no purpose but to be… there.

So, in my version of Wish, Amaya would be a co-conspirator to her husband and yes, I’m adding Charo too. Her personality would be inspired by classic female villains such as the Evil Queen from Snow White, Lady Tremaine from Cinderella, and Maleficent from Sleeping Beauty.

Vain, glamorous, cunning, and unabashedly evil, Amaya would be the Morticia to Magnifico’s Gomez, the brains to his brawn. She’s the girlboss, he’s the wife instigator. Magnifico spoils Amaya rotten with countless gifts and praises, whilst Amaya is the more calm and collected evil compared to her husband’s ever-growing temper.

While she starts the story with no magic, Magnifico just can’t leave his wife hanging and shares the power of the evil spell-book with Amaya. And yes, even Charo gets in on the fun, turning from a small house cat, to a massive shape-shifting beast who breaths blue fire similarly to a dragon (shut up i think it’d be cool)

Magnifico and Amaya essentially keep the wishes of Rosas locked in the castle as a form of obedience. By giving the citizens false hope, it makes them more dependent on the royal couple, and the two have more power over everyone.

Anyways, let’s get to the main characters: Asha and Star.

I don’t have much of an issue with Asha’s character, more so her design. I already made a post showing my redesign of her, so that’s out of the way. Tbh tho, I also have an issue with the rest of the costume design of Wish, being a big costume nerd myself. The movie’s supposed to take inspiration from the Mediterranean, primarily places such as Spain and Morocco (and the Amazigh people for Asha), but the fashion feels like generic European medieval fashion.

I feel like the whole storyline of Asha’s interview with Magnifico was pretty pointless, so I would have it that she just starts off as the kings apprentice, whilst also working as Amaya’s scullery maid.

The couple took Asha in when the girl lost her father at the age of 12 (according to the film), and she’s been working for them for five years. Asha works not only to support herself, her family, and her community, but also as a way to distract from the grief of losing her father. Which is no issue, as Amaya always bombards the girl with chores, and Magnifico only teaches Asha the most basic of magic for fear of her growing more powerful than him.

I made Asha work as a scullery maid not only as a reference to princesses such as Snow White and Cinderella starting off their respective stories as maids, but also because scullery maids acted as assistants to the kitchen maids. Dahlia works in the kitchen, Asha and Dahlia are best friends, I figured it made sense.

But anyways, on the day of Sabino’s 100th birthday, Sakina tells Asha to take a break and return home, as she hardly visits anymore due to work. Asha says she’ll try asking the king and queen to get off early, but that she can’t make any promises.

Asha meets with Magnifico and asks for the day off, but the king refuses. However, wanting to keep her loyalty, Magnifico finally shows Asha the wish chamber, and even allows her to witness the wish ceremony that night. But once Asha starts questioning the king on his methods, any goodwill between them begins to fade.

Another thing I’m disappointed in, is that originally Star was going to be a shapeshifting humanoid inspired by the Genie and Peter Pan, and may have even had a romance with Asha. But, the idea was scrapped for the more cutesy, ‘marketable’, version of Star.

In my retelling, I’d choose to do this human shapeshifter version of Star, but I’d name him something else. The star Earendel was mentioned in the concept art book, which is the farthest known star from Earth and not only means ‘morning star’ in Old English, but is also named after the Tolkien character, Eärendil.

I would call this shapeshifter Star Earen, and because Disney loves their animal/cute sidekicks, Earen can have the ‘Kirby’ Star as a companion, just like how Asha has Valentino and Magnifico and Amaya have Charo.

((Side #2: Anybody else notice that Star lowkey looks and sounds like Kirby😶))

Earen and Star journey down to Rosas once they hear Asha’s pleas for guidance. Once Asha tells of Magnifico and Amaya’s lies, Earen reveals that he actually met Magnifico decades ago. The amount of years shocks Asha, as she realizes that the King and Queen might be far older than what they are.

((Side note #3: I didn’t realize this till someone mentioned it, but if Sabino is 100 and he gave Magnifico his wish at 18, then he’s been waiting 82 years for his wish to be granted. Which means it’s likely that Magnifico might be immortal. That, or Disney didn’t think this shit through (most likely)))

Anyways, Earen actually attempted to stop Magnifico and Amaya’s ploy to keep the wishes of Rosas locked away, but he was sealed within the heavens until he and Star heard Asha make her wish.

We can have it that the king and queen spun the story so that Earen was made out to be an evil that once threatened Rosas, but Magnifico banished him and saved everyone, essentially making himself out to be the good guy and manipulating the narrative.

Asha and Earen must now work together to expose the lies of the royal couple, and along the way, the two begin to fall in love. Earen disguises himself as a peasant boy so as to remain inconspicuous, while Asha tries to go about her job as if nothing happened, evading the King and Queen’s suspicions.

Star gives Asha a stick infused with stardust once finding out she is, quite literally, the sorcerers apprentice. It is also so that she may defend herself, as Earen has his powers and a sword (similarly to Peter Pan).

Unlike Magnifico, Earen and Star teach Asha the wonders of magic and the potential she wields, showing that there is no need for her to hold back when her gift can help so many, including those she loves.

The three manage to sneak into the kings study, but only have time to retrieve Sabino’s wish and return it to him. However, Magnifico and Amaya, now strengthened by the powers of dark magic, find Asha and Earen and threaten to destroy all the wishes should Earen not surrender to them.

And as a way to ensure that Asha doesn’t foil their plans, Magnifico destroys both Asha and Sakina’s wishes, despite Asha not being eighteen yet. However, the evil magic allows him to do so. This act weakens the two women, and infuriates Earen.

Earen then willingly complies despite Asha’s opposition, and Sabino takes Asha and Sabina to the seven (well six) teens for aid, who are in hiding after Simon ratted them out and who now serves as a puppet to the king and queen.

Despite loosing her wish, Asha finds the strength to carry on through the memory of her late father, enlisting the help of her friends and Star, who managed to evade the royal couple’s grasp. The team must work together to save Earen, whose power will be drained by Magnifico and Amaya. And if such a feat were to happen, then Earen would die and Rosas would be lost.

The five teens go into the woods to distract one of the royals, with the aid of the forest fauna and Star. Amaya chases the group alongside Charo while Magnifico tortures Earen and begins stealing his power. With the help of Dahlia, Asha sneaks into the castle to confront her former mentor and save Earen before it’s too late.

At first, it seems that the heroes have the upper hand with Magnifico neutralized, but then, Amaya swoops in riding Charo, who now takes the form of a giant dragon. Earen transforms into a dragon himself and battles Charo and Amaya, while Asha continues battling Magnifico. Star even comes to help after the original plan fails.

However, the unholy trio have the upper hand, and Amaya strikes down Earen, giving Magnifico enough time to not only drain Earen’s power, but to trap Star within his staff. With their combined powers, Magnifico and Amaya gather all of the peoples wishes, even stealing the wishes of those not yet of age, which includes the teens.

With all the wishes gathered, the couple and their pet destroy all the wishes, taking their energy for themselves.

Asha falls into despair as she watched her friends, love ones, and community succumb to the grief of loosing their wishes. The king and queen force Asha to apologize to the people, mocking her and making her feel even more guilty.

However, Earen comforts Asha despite his weak state, telling her it’s alright and that she shouldn’t be ashamed of wishing on Star, as he brought the two of them together. The two kiss, the strength of their newfound love and hope shining through the darkness and inspiring the people of Rosas to rise up.

As the sky and stars become alive, Magnifico’s staff is destroyed, releasing Star in the process. All the evil magic he, Amaya, and Charo used is sucked out of them and vanquished, and Earen is restored to full vitality.

Think of this as the transformation scene from Princess and the Frog. Asha and Earen get new outfits, with Asha even gaining a crown and a new wand from Star.

((Side Note #4: The “transformation” in the finale of the film is so stupid. Asha could’ve literally gotten a new dress once she becomes a fairy godmother, but instead, Star just made her sparkly. How magical🙄))

Rosas rejoices, as they realize they don’t need the king to make their wishes come true, and they can pursue them themselves. With Magnífico and Amaya banished from Rosas, Asha and Earen become the new rulers, being names Prince and Princess respectively.

And that’s basically how I would’ve done Wish. It’s not perfect, but it’s just an idea. I’m just disappointed that Disney do something better for their 100th anniversary.

[eyesxxyou]

𝖕𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖑 𝖔𝖋 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖘𝖊𝖆 🏴‍☠️🐚

| i. one| pearly white eyes

🐚・・・pirate!Hobie x mute!siren!reader.

𝔠𝔬𝔫𝔱𝔢𝔫𝔱: blood. death. decompostion. mentions of person being eaten. reader is caged. mention of selling reader.

↳ ❝ If only the sea would love him back. How unrequited his adoration was ❞

𝔪𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔩𝔦𝔰𝔱

“Da ocean is no’cha friend, ‘Obie. It’ll chew ya up ‘n spit’cha ou’ ‘n there won’ be a trace of ya left.” His mother would grab his chin when he was young and gazed at the ocean for too long, hypnotized by the lapping waves at the shore, like it was coaxing him toward it. He’d stand there, body swaying with the sea back and forth back and forth, its song luring him closer. She’d try to hurry him along as they made their way to the market from their little home.

But Hobie would linger, feet bare against the ground, toes digging into the sand. The salt of the sea carried by the wind across his nose. He closed his eyes and listened—listened to the song of the sea. The crash of the waves against the rocks below, the seagulls cawing in the distance, the ripple of the salty wind against his face. He could taste it if he stuck his tongue out.

He knew that this was what it felt like to be completely at peace.

He let his eyes flutter open slowly and suddenly he was on the beach, taller, dressed in clothing that didn’t feel like his own. The sun had barely begun to set over the horizon, painting the sky in broad strokes of lilly pink and tangerine orange. The sea was calm, gentle waves washing up on shore. It was foamy and white, wetting his leather boots. Then it was pink, then the unmistakable brown-ish color of old blood. He looked out at the sea. Red, all red.

“‘Obie.” The calming voice of his mother. Low and thickly accented. Hobie looked back down at his feet and there she was, his poor mother, lying in the wet sand almost as if she had been washed up onto shore. The sea had spit her out. Half decomposed, half eaten, with blood coming from her ears. Her eyes were open, milky white, not a single spark of life to be found within them. But she spoke, her half exposed jaw opening. “‘Obie.”

“Mama?” He couldn’t move. Why couldn’t he move? Why couldn’t he help her? Why was he so useless? Why couldn’t he save her?

“I’s time t’wake up, ‘Obie.” She crooned so softly, almost singing to him. 

Hobie stared down at her, unable to look away as her body slowly withered away and turned to seafoam. Unable to do anything to stop it. “Mama, ‘m sorry I couldn’ save ya. ‘M sorry. Please forgive me.” He wanted her to hold him, even if she was decaying before his eyes. He wanted to know her kindness, her warmth, her forgiveness, just one last time.

But she just looked at him vacantly, with those dead eyes of hers. Just before her face melted away into nothingness, she spoke one last time.

“Wake up.”

Hobie shot up in bed, his eyes vigorously searching about his surroundings– wide and wild with panic. He was no longer on that beach he had known so well in his youth. He sat in his cabin, aboard his ship, The Mary Jane. His mother was nowhere to be found. She hasn’t been for years. He knew that already.

He was layered in a thin film of cold sweat, his chest rose and fell with the sway of the ship. His skin glistened under the golden rays of dawn stretching her fingers across the sky to mark a new day. It caressed him, told him it would all be okay. But it offered no comfort. He reached up and wiped away a stray tear from his cheek. Hobie figured there was no use in going back to sleep. He didn’t want to go back to sleep, didn’t want to run the risk of another recurring nightmare.

Hobie left his bed, disheveled and disgruntled. He grabbed his billowy, off-white tunic shirt from off the floor and slid it on over his head before grabbing his boots to shove onto his feet on his way out of his cabin. Tossing the door open, Hobie used his arm to cover his eyes from the rising sun. His face scrunched, grimacing at the abrupt brightness that overtook him. His lip curled with distaste. He was not a morning person.

“‘mornin’, Cap’n. How’d you sleep?”

Hobie looked up at the crow’s nest where one of his crew sat happily perched, looking down at him with a smile almost brighter than the early-morning sun. His skin was a deep caramel and his dark brown hair fell over his face, only tied back by a blue scarf. Pavitr had been placed on look out and by the looks of it, he'd been up there all night. He looked tired but was trying to hide it by being energetic.

Hobie only grunted and that was all the answer Pav needed to know that he had another nightmare. Everyone on the crew knew he had them but no one had the gull to bring it up to him or try to talk to him about it. He wasn’t the type to want to talk about and no one wanted to upset him. He had given them all a home aboard The Mary Jane and asks for nothing in return besides that they never talk to him about the things they’ve heard coming from his cabin.

“Get down from there ‘n get some rest, Pav.” Hobie motioned him down as he walked away.

The rest of his crew roamed about on the deck, either preparing their swords and guns or cleaning. There wasn’t much to do between raids besides prepare for the next one to float along their path. Most delegated chores amongst themselves simply out of sheer boredom. They all nodded their heads respectfully or greeted Hobie with a quiet, “‘mornin’, Cap’n”. They must have all known. Either he had been yelling again or they could tell just by the way he carried himself with a heaviness they could all feel, he cared not for which.

Hobie made his way up to the forecastle deck where he could feel the sea wind the best. He leaned against the railing and closed his eyes as he always had when he was a child and took in the beauty of the sea through the rest of his senses. The smell of salt and fish burned his nose and the breeze kissed his slender cheeks. He could feel the coolness of his rings against his knuckles and the layered chains around his neck almost restricting him. And he loved it all.

If only he could close his eyes and make it last forever. If only the sea would love him back. How unrequited his adoration was. He’s learned to despise the ocean and her children for everything it has done to him. And he’s vowed to conquer it. In a way, that's how he loved it.

“Cap’n.” Hobie didn’t open his eyes nor did he answer but he knew who stood beside him. She tried again. “Hobie.” He opened his eyes and glanced to his side where stood Gwen, a small blonde with brilliant blue eyes and a fierce attitude. She looked up at him sympathetically, the only one willing to take the risk to talk to him about his nightmares. “How were things last night? You were talking rather loudly in your sleep.” Her fingers twiddled with each other in front of her but she never stopped looking at him.

Hobie turned his head away, his jaw tightening with discomfort. “There’s nothin’ t’say. Y’all heard i’.” He dragged his tongue along the soft inner flesh of his cheek. “I don’ think i’s something’ we need t’talk ‘bout.” He retracted. It was easy to pull away from others. No one on deck knew him like Gwen did though, but even she had limited knowledge about Hobie’s life before he took up a life at sea.

“I won’t force you to talk, I never do. But I want you to know I’m always here if you need to talk. I’m your friend before anything else.” She placed her hand on Hobie’s shoulder only for him to shrug her away. “‘M fine. Where’s ya boyfriend, Gwendy. Go bother him.” He didn’t mean for his words to come off as harsh as they had but it didn’t seem to deter her.

She leaned against the wooden railing beside Hobie and sighed, looking out at the open sea before them. The sun was rising quickly, still red. The sea was as red as freshly spilled blood. She opened her mouth to speak but paused. Her eyes narrowed into slits as she looked out into the distance. “Is that a ship?”

Hobie perked up and squinted his eyes as well. It was indeed a British royal navy ship, the sails only half unraveled, just wading through the shallow waters entirely directionless. There seemed to be no one on the deck. There was something off about it. If he could see them with just his bare eyes then they could certainly see The Mary Jane, so why weren’t they attacking? They were certainly within range.

“Prepare the cannons but don’ fire jus’ yet. Ge’ ready to board.”

Gwen gave one firm nod and marched off to direct the rest of the crew who jumped up with enthusiasm and began scuttling about the deck in preparation. Finally, some excitement.

Hobie took his place at the helm of the ship, steering closer to the navy ship with an air of caution settling over the deck. “Fire a warning shot.” He commanded with authority that everyone respected. Within minutes there was a fire shot at the ship and before they knew it a white flag was being flown over the navy ship. They had given up without so much as a fight.

He was sure it must be a trap, a farce to get him to lower his guard. Hobie grabbed his sword and gun and rounded up some of his crew to board the navy ship with him while the others stayed behind to protect the Mary Jane from attack. He gathered Pav, Gwen, Miles, as well as a handful of others and took them with him.

Hobie boarded the navy ship with a heavy thump of his boots, his saber unsheathed in preparation for an attack. His eyes shifted back and forth, ringed fingers gripping the handle of his sword with a hold so tight his knuckles paled. He was soon followed by the rest of his crew, all equally as cautious.

“Search the ship, bring me everyone you can find.”

His crew split up and began to scour the ship for any people or loot they could find. Most of the crew were still asleep and were summarily caught with their pants down. Quite literally, as some were brought to Hobie in only their underwear. Including the captain or the ship who was tied up and brought before Hobie, shoved to his knees.

Hobie held the tip of his sword to the captain’s throat. He was an older, pale man with graying hair, round and fat with lack of work. He looked cowardly, afraid of the fate that lay before him. “We surrendered, take whatever you please. But leave us our dignity.” The man pleaded dramatically and Hobie found himself wanting nothing more than to slit the man’s throat and be done with it. He was not in the mood for being merciful after the night he’s had.

“Why did y’surrender so easily?”

The captain trembled. “We were raided by pirates just a day ago. We were in no position to fight. Most of our men were lost. Please, I beg.” He laced his fingers together only for Hobie to press his sword to his throat and draw the slightest bit of blood. “I wonder why I don’ believe ya.” His eyes narrowed with suspicion.

“Cap’n.” Miles came from the hold below the deck and motioned Hobie to come. “You’ll want to see this.” He shifted with distress and urgency. His golden, brown eyes shifted between Hobie and the lower deck where he, Gwen, and Pav all resided.

“Watch all of ‘em.” Hobie commanded the rest of his crew. “Don’ hesitate to kill anyone who ge’s outta line.” He looked back down to the white man before him before marching past him in firm strides towards the hold. Hobie followed Miles down, his sword still drawn.

It was dark in the hold and the smell of stale ale and old fish stung in his nose. The dim light of a lanturn offered just enough light to see exactly what Miles had beckoned him down for. He had seen you.

You were the most hauntingly beautiful thing he had ever seen. Pav and Gwen stood around the cage you were in; Miles joined them, all of them staring with something of wonder or horror, it was hard to tell which. Maybe it was a bit of both. Maybe they were one in the same.

You had eyes like the freshest milk he's ever seen, eyes like pearls, white and sparkling, all wide and framed with long lashes that stuck together with the tears that ran down your cheeks and over quivering lips that undoubtedly hid the horror of your fanged teeth. Shimmering scales like iridescent pearls showed up in small patches over your skin, on your shoulders, your forearms and your calves. You were akin to a human, minus the scales, your finned ears, and the fins that stuck out of the backs of your forearms and legs. You were covered in strings of pearls that hung around your neck and over your hips, shells, and coverings made of seaweed. 

You were something divine, something not of this world, something so terrifyingly gorgeous. Hobie knew exactly what you were.

“I’s a fuckin’ siren.” Hobie marched forward, his face stone-like with dispassion. He grinded his teeth almost to dust. His lip curled with disgust and his eyes lit up with fury. “Open the cage so I can kill the tin’.” They all looked at him with something of fear and worry. They had never seen him so furious about anything.

“Shouldn’t we think about this?” Pav stood between you and Hobie, his brows furrowed. “It’s hurt.” He looked back at you and saw the dried blood caked onto your skin originating from a large wound in your shoulder. “Shouldn’t we ask more questions? Why do they have a siren locked up in the first place? We should all be dead right now but we’re not.”

“Plus, sirens are useful. They cost a lot on the market.” Gwen piped up.

They were right. Hobie didn’t want to admit it but they were right. Siren's blood was highly valuable and was used to heal illnesses and injuries. Their scales were used to make jewelry as well. They were highly sought after and would make a good bounty but hunting them was incredibly dangerous. It’s rare that anyone actually captures one. They're known to bring entire ships to the bottom of the sea where they’d eat their victims.

Hobie sighed. He’d save himself a lot of trouble if he just killed you before you drowned the whole lot of them. “Keep them in the cage for now.” He turned on his booted heels and made his way back onto the upper deck. Everyone was just where they had been. He stood before the captain of the ship once more and glowered at him. “Wha’s with the siren? Y’should all be dead righ’ now.”

“I- We captured it for his majesty…he wants to make a zoo of the things, but it’s broken. Can’t sing. Figured…we jus’ might sell it on the market for parts. You– you can have it. Just leave us.” He smiled as he offered you to him, wearily and desperately. Something about the offer disgusted Hobie. The selling of flesh, even if it wasn’t that of a human, was morally reprehensible in his book.

With one swift motion of his sword, Hobie slit the captain’s throat and watched as he fell to the deck, choking and gurgling on his own blood. Blood splattered onto Hobie’s face at the initial spray and down the rest of his body as the captain collapsed.

He stepped on the captain’s body as he made his way back down to the hold to figure out if he should do just the same with you. Your kind killed hundreds in your lifetime, thousands even. Your kind lured people to their deaths by way of seducing them with everything they desired in life. There was something quite despicably sinister about it.

Hobie came back and stood before you, your frail, injured body. You looked up at him with those milky white eyes that almost made him flinch. He couldn’t bear to look at you, the way you wept, as if you were crying for your life. How could such a thing look so perfect while crying? He cursed his feelings, his empathy, his humanity. Would a being like you even understand something like that? Something as complex and beyond comprehension as human emotion? He barely understood it himself.

“Let it go.”

Gwen and Miles fiddled with the lock until they managed to break it open and let you free. You didn’t move for a bit, your eyes flicking from side to side at all of them to see what they would do. You trembled with fear, you sobbed in choking gasps. Hobie knew that sirens were meant to be alluring, that’s how they captured their victims, but he didn’t know one could look so pretty while crying.

After a while of stillness, you finally began to move. You crawled out of the small cage you had been locked in, wincing at the pressure put upon your injured shoulder until you stood up. You were a fragile thing, looking between the four of them as they all stood back and watched you. They were waiting for the moment you’d flip, the moment you’d sing your hypnotizing song and convince them to all jump ship.

“You’re free.” Hobie moved out of the way, sheathing his sword to show he meant no harm. He did it despite all signals in his mind telling him this was a terrible idea. “No one will kill ya, no one will sell ya. Yer probably gonna die from ya injuries anyway. Jus’ go.” If you remained in his presence any longer, he may just lose it. Your kind stole innocent people from their families. Monsters, the whole lot of you.

But you didn’t move, you just stared at him, blankly, blinking with those pretty lashes of yours. Your lips formed into the smallest pout.

Hobie sighed. “Don’cha understand me?” Sirens were meant to understand all languages.

You nodded, tears still streaking your pretty face.

“Then go, go now, before I change my min’.” He gritted his teeth and pointed towards the door, moving further out of the way to give you more room to leave. You hesitated just for a moment before beginning to walk on shaky legs and bare feet. You look at them all as you pass them but you stop in front of Hobie and stare– just stare for a long, drawn out moment. You stare even when he turns his face away from yours because he can’t bear to look into those eyes.

That’s when you begin to run. You scramble off up the stairs, soon followed by Hobie, Miles, Gwen, and Pav, and they all watch as you climb and stand on the edge of the boat. You look back one last time at Hobie before turning back towards the sea and diving overboard.

They all rush to watch you swim away. All except Hobie, who can’t stop thinking about those pearl white eyes.

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

Chad defending you from a guy who touched his girl at halloween party. I love protective boyfriend chad!

This was in my drafts and I forgot to post it...oops

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

Chad wasn’t the jealous type. He was protective and liked to show others that you were together in every small way possible — wearing his Blackmore hoodie on game days, having subtle matching things like shirts or jewelry, setting a cute selfie of you two as his phone background, resting his hand on a part of your body in casual intimacy —, but he never shouted at Ethan for giving you a friendly hug or sent any threatening glares at Trevor, the guy that worked with you at the library.

‘’You’re staying with me all night tonight. I’m not letting you out of my sight,’’ Chad declared as you walked to the frat house the Halloween party was at, struggling to take his eyes off you in your cowgirl costume.

Getting matching costumes was cringy according to Mindy, but you and Chad decided to ignore her. It was cute and reminded people that you were together. Quinn had helped you with your costume, letting you borrow a shirt from her closet to match with your cow print skirt and cowboy boots.

‘’I could say the same about you. You’re not even wearing a shirt! You’re flashing those abs and muscles to everyone.’’ You ran your hand over his toned chest, catching yourself smiling knowing it was all yours to touch and kiss and lick. ‘’Just last week at your game, I caught three girls gawking at you. I was wearing your jersey with your damn name on it. Was it not clear enough that you were already taken?’’

‘’Y/N’s right,’’ Tara chimed, catching up behind you in her pirate costume. ‘’Those college girls are worse than high school ones. They don’t care if a guy has a girlfriend, they’ll still flirt and try to get in their pants.’’

‘’I’m not stupid enough to fall for their shit though,’’ Chad reassured you, wrapping an arm around you and pulling you in.

You hugged him back, feeling lucky to have a faithful man.

Half an hour after arriving, Chad finally agreed to let you wander around. Although it sounded like that, you didn’t need his permission. You just wanted Chad to understand that you would be alright on your own.

‘’Don't accept drinks from anyone and don’t let your cup out of your sight. And don’t drink the punch — you never know what’s in it. So many horrible college stories start with a spiked drink at a party.’’

‘’Yes, dad,’’ you replied, pecking his lips before disappearing among the other party-ers in search of Tara. Maybe she would be down to have some shots with you?

Just two, you told yourself as Tara poured vodka into small shot glasses. Two turned into three, and then you got enrolled into a game of beer-pong with some guys from your film class. You were kicking their asses, throwing the ball skillfully into the cups.

A few meters away, Chad was looking at you proudly. His girl was bruising these guys' masculinity and it was hilarious to see their embarrassed faces. One of them had a very poor aim and knocked a cup down, causing it to spill on the floor. Amateurs.

‘’Come on, Tara, you can do it!’’ you cheered, encouraging the petite brunette.

The shots you had downed earlier were messing with her concentration, but she was determined to get the ball in the last cup.

Unfortunately, she missed.

She pouted and the guys played their turn, getting only one ball. Tara offered to take the drink and you placed yourself in position, but just as you were about to throw the ball, the fake cop put his hand on the small of your back, dangerously close to your ass, and you completely froze. He whispered something in your ear, but you didn’t hear.

All you heard was Chad’s voice when he pulled the guy off you and shoved him against the wall, snapping you out of your frozen state.

On your left, Tara gasped, not expecting such violence from her friend. ‘’Chad!’’

‘’Don’t ever touch my girl like that,’’ he hissed at the guy, the altercation getting a few people’s attention. ‘’Got it?’’

The fake cop laughed, feeling cocky. ‘’Oh, come on! We’re just having fun.’’ He glanced at you and you shifted uncomfortably in your cowgirl costume, still feeling the ghost of the guy’s hand on your ass. His mouth curled into a smirk. ‘’With a perfect little ass like hers, I couldn’t help myse—’’

Utterly disgusted, Chad didn’t let him finish his sentence — he couldn’t — and shoved his fist against the fake cop’s chest to shut him up…which only reeled him more. He shoved Chad back by the shoulders.

As much as you appreciated Chad taking your defense, the situation was escalating and unless you wanted the night to end with a broken nose — for the other guy —, you needed to stop the fight.

You stepped in and grabbed Chad’s arm before he could shove the guy another time, but before you could say anything the fake cop shoved Chad back harder, causing him to stumble back into you. He steadied himself on his feet easily enough and you grabbed the table to stop you from falling. 

Tara rushed to your side, asking if you were okay. You nodded.

''Chad, stop!'' you called to him, grabbing his arm with a stronger grip. ''This idiot is not worth your time.'' His jaw was clenched when he finally glanced at you. ''He's just looking for a fight, let's go.''

—

Scream taglist: @misfityanii @beautybyfire @iluvscream191 @mariposa555 @bella7866 @o638 @lulubelle14 @luvvtxinityy @frasersgf  @Eddiefrickenmunson @jasperr-the-friendly-ghost @ghostf4cee @thesebitcheslovesosadotcom @wandaswigglywoos @xjennyx2 @jennasslut @thatonesblog  @mikaelsonsstuff @icarly23 @tcddszn  @bt.oliana  @skyesthebomb @a1mzcruml3y @red1culous @iluurmom @popeheywardssecretgf

All and more taglist: @spiokybirdstarfish @kenqki @liidiaaag @hawkegfs  @gillybear17  @areaderinlove @acornacreacure @black-rose-29 @fudge13 @cece05 @rosie-cameron @Caxddce @laylasbunbunny @gemofthenight @beautyb1ade  @hi-bored-as-fcuk-rn  @lovelyy-moonlight @mellabella101 @vxnity713  @marzipaanz  @bisexualgirlsblog @queenofslytherin889

[not-wholly-unheroic]

A Comparative Analysis of Hook’s Ship and Cabin in Popular Media Portrayals

Part 4: Peter Pan (2003)

P.J. Hogan’s 2003 film is full of life and color, and Isaacs’ Hook is likewise a colorful character who, though grounded in reality, most definitely has a flair for the dramatic and a taste for the finer things in life.

Like the other Hooks we have seen thus far, Isaacs’ Jolly Roger appears to be the large stereotypical pirate ship that all children think of, despite the impracticality of a slower vessel in actual piracy. (By this point, I think we should just assume that all Hooks go for form over function when it comes to their choice of ship.) It’s a gorgeous ship, and I do wish we got more close-ups of the outside of this particular Roger so we could see more of what’s going on with all the decorative work on the outside of the cabin and the figurehead, etc. One thing, though, that stands out about this ship is that the mainsail itself has a giant skull and crossed swords on it. This would be completely impractical for any actual ship, as the enemy would see them coming and know they were pirates right off the bat…lending credence to the idea that this ship (and this Hook) may be deeply shaped by the children’s imagination. Then again…what else should we expect of a pirate ship whose name itself is the Jolly Roger?

The shots we get of the inside of Isaacs Hook’s cabin reveal the living space of a man who is accustomed to a decadent lifestyle but not so over-the-top as to be entirely unrealistic. While his beautifully decorated harpsichord is the centerpiece of the room, we also notice that he has several tables, a couch, and a globe.

This is about all we can tell from the in-film shots of the cabin, but some promotional material and a pirate-themed hotel that purchased a few set pieces from the film and set up their own room to mimic Hook’s can give us a few ideas about what the rest of the cabin might look like. (Big shout-out to @annabellioncourt for providing several of these bonus material images!)

In the one promotional photo, there is what looks like a lute, perhaps, in the background. I also love the little detail of the skull and crossbones on the candle stand…and his li’l stripey socks.

Here we can see the full-sized bed with a gun and what looks like it might be an Eton crest over it. (Note that if you pay close attention in Hook’s intro scene in the film, you will actually see that the tattoo on his left arm is an Eton crest as well.)

Isaacs Hook also has a self-portrait in his cabin, it seems…which interestingly has a date on the frame of 1742. This is about the most specific we get with ANY Hook as far as time period goes. This is after the Golden Age of Piracy had really already come to an end, though it’s technically possible he might still have been “Blackbeard’s bosun” depending on his age, as Blackbeard’s career ended in 1718 in a battle off Ocracoke Island, NC. Isaacs himself was around 40 years old when the filming was done, so if we want to assume Hook was around the same age when he came to Neverland and the portrait was done shortly before then, he would have been around 16 at the time of Blackbeard’s downfall. A bit young but…it’s possible if he started his career at sea early. Cabin boys usually started out around age 12 but could be as young as 8-ish on occasion. However…this wouldn’t really track with Hook being an Eton student. Assuming he actually graduated, he would have been at the school until he turned 18. So while Isaacs Hook may have very well been a sailor or even more specially a pirate prior to Neverland…he likely wasn’t a peer of Blackbeard or the other more well-known pirates of the early 1700s.

One last thing that is interesting to me is that in addition to the more standard weapons/tools like chains, guns, and boarding axes that we see in some shots, this version of Hook keeps what looks like an entire small cabinet of various tinctures and powders. At least the one of them which he removes is poison, but one wonders….are they all different kinds of poison? Or are some, perhaps, medicinal in nature or for recreational use?

As a whole, Isaacs’ Hook is, I think, perhaps one of the most realistic portrayals of the character. While there are some highly fanciful aspects to his ship—like the giant skull on the mainsail—much of his personal space has the lavish furnishings one might expect of someone with an aristocratic background without feeling too entirely impractical. Add to that a concrete date on the portrait, and I’d say this Hook is more grounded in reality than nearly any of the others we’ve encountered so far.

[s10127470]

Franchise Idea: Nickelodeon Kingdoms

What you're seeing right now is actually real.

This is the official title card for an online Nickelodeon game called Nick Kingdoms, released back in 2014.

The premise of that game is that it's set in a fantasy world where various Nickelodeon shows (specifically those from the Nicktoons line-up) co-exist as separate kingdoms.

As you could tell by the title card, you can see various Nickelodeon from around that time being completely redesigned from this whole new universe!

SpongeBob looks like a pirate captain.

The Breadwinners look like they're part of a biker gang.

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles look rightfully like they came from feudal Japan.

Bloom looks like she came right out of a fairytale world.

And Sanjay and Craig look like absolute party animals.

And after stumbling upon this after nearly a decade, I couldn't help but think....

Or more importantly, why didn't Nick do more with this game.

All the shows you see represented here were the only ones that were.

After 2014, they never updated the game, most likely because it's a online game that can only be accessed through the Nickelodeon website.

And it really sucks because it would've been cool to see them add other notable Nick shows to this world.

And since I'm bored and I have nothing better to do today, I thought of the idea of Nickelodeon bringing this forgotten game back from the dead.

But not as a mobile game or even a video game, but instead as an entire franchise.

It would kind be like how Disney has multiple franchises under their belts involving their original animated films like The Disney Princesses and Disney Villains.

It would be cool to see a company like Nickelodeon having a entire franchise based around their huge catalog of IPs....

Which I don't think they've ever done before.

Sure the IPs themselves are basically franchises in their own rights, but Nick hasn't had a franchise that used them all together.

Anyway, sit back and grab a snack and follow me as I take you all on a journey through the new and improved world of.....

Nickelodeon Kingdoms!

For this post, I'm gonna list some shows (both notable and virtually obscure) from the Nicktoons line-up and share how they would be represented as kingdoms for this franchise.

As for the ones that were already in the game, they would be expand on a bit.

SpongeBob SquarePants: SpongeBob's kingdom in the original game was presented as sort of a pirate-themed version of the Bikini Bottom. For this franchise, the pirate theming would be ever stronger here. In fact, SpongeBob's kingdom would be based in a part of the ocean filled with tropical islands that are brimming with pirates, both human and aquatic. SpongeBob's kingdom would draw heavy influence from The Caribbean, specifically during the Golden Age of Piracy.

The Fairly Oddparents: The Fairly Oddparents' kingdom would be presented as a mixture between Dimmsdale and Fairy World. It's architecture would be a mixture between fantastical and modern, it would be inhabited by humans, fairies and other fantasy creatures, and it would based high up in the clouds.

Rugrats: The Rugrats' kingdom would be a presented as a prehistoric metropolis in the veins of The Flintstones. The prehistoric theming would be a reference to Reptar. The land the kingdom is based in would be surrounded by various environments commonly found in prehistoric-themed media: grasslands, jungles, swamps, lagoons, volcanic mountains, polar regions, and bone-filled wastelands.

Ren and Stimpy: Ren and Stimpy's kingdom would be city heavily inspired by various locations in Canada. This would serve as a reference to the duo's famous role as Canadian Kilted Yaksmen.

Aaahh, Real Monsters!: The Real Monsters' kingdom would be presented as a junkyard city inhabited by monsters.

Angry Beavers: The Angry Beavers' kingdom would be presented as a forest-themed metropolis inhabited by slightly anthropomorphic forest animals.

Hey Arnold!: Hey Arnold's kingdom would be presented a urban metropolis with a heavy sports-theming. This would be a nod to the fact that in the show, one of Arnold and his friends favorite passtime was playing sports.

Jimmy Neutron: Jimmy Neutron's kingdom would be presented as a floating futuristic version of Retroville (smack-dabbed in the atmosphere) with a 1950s theming. This would be a perfect combination of the many out-of-this-world adventures Jimmy and his friends have gone on, and the 50s-styled town they live in.

The Wild Thornberrys: The Wild Thornberrys' kingdom would be presented as being themed around colonial Africa....but minus the problematic elements. The land would be presented with a colonial town, multiple tribal villages, and landscapes like savannahs, jungles, swamps, and deserts. Admittedly, coming up with a kingdom based around the Wild Thornberrys was a pretty tricky concept since the family travels all over the world. But one of the many locations they've traveled to, I believe Africa has been the one they've visited the most, so I felt like that would be best place to based the kingdom around. As for the colonial theming, I felt it would help give the kingdom a safari theme to fit perfectly with the show.

Rocket Power: Rocket Power's kingdom would be a mixture between the California seaside-town Ocean Shores and Hawaii. I feel like having the kingdom be a mix between California surf culture and Polynesian culture would be perfect for a kingdom based around Rocket Power, given that the latter has played a major part in a show.

Invader Zim: Invader Zim's kingdom would literally just be an Irken version of the City that the show mostly takes place in. Essentially it would be best of both worlds. Yeah, I don't really have much to say to this place.

ChalkZone: ChalkZone's kingdom is basically just ChalkZone, except it's also inhabited by regular humans.

My Life as a Teenage Robot: My Life as a a Teenage Robot's kingdom would be a futuristic version of Tremorton. Yeah....I pretty much made the town that was sort of anti-robotic into a futuristic community. Talk about ironic.

Danny Phantom: Danny Phantom's kingdom would presented as creepy, gothic version of Amity Park, surrounded like various haunted lands. These lands would be inhabited by ghosts and other supernatural creatures, and have environments themed around the major ghost that reside there. Like a savage jungle for Skulker, an Arabian-style kingdom and desert for Desiree, a 1950s-style town for Johnny 13 and Sidney Poindexter, etc.

Avatar: I don't even need to explain this one.

El Tigre: El Tigre's kingdom would be a version of Miracle City that's a mixture between colonial and Mesoamerican Mexico. Giving that show has presented architecture from both eras of Mexican eras (especially the latter), I felt a even more extreme combination of both would be perfect for a kingdom based on the show.

Back at the Barnyard: Back at the Barnyard's kingdom would be presented as a rural country town akin to the ones found in the American Southwest and Deep South, inhabited by humans and talking farm animals ala Bojack Horseman. Yeah, that's kind of about it.

Tak and the Power of Juju: I don't even need to explain this one either.

The Mighty B: The Mighty B's kingdom would be a bee-themed version of San Francisco. Basically imagine the bee city from the Bee Movie and that's what you got.

Fanboy and Chum Chum: Fanboy and Chum Chum's kingdom would be an icy version of Galaxy Hills, as a nod to the show's well-known (and only) superhero, Man-Arctica.

T.U.F.F. Puppy: T.U.F.F. Puppy's kingdom would be basically Petropolis mixed with Zootopia. Please don't sue me Disney.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The TMNT's kingdom in the game was presented as metropolis that was a mixture between New York City and feudal Japan. And yeah, that theming would still be present.

Sanjay and Craig: Sanjay and Craig's kingdom in the game was presented as a version of Lundgren, but with a heavy focus on partying with stuff like amusement parks and music concerts. And just the TMNT kingdom, that theming would still be present.

Breadwinners: The Breadwinners' kingdom in the game was essentially Pondgea....but the same as it was in the show. But this time, the kingdom would be presented as a chain of various islands based around aquatic ecosystems like swamps, bayous, forests, rainforests, etc.

Harvey Beaks: Harvey Beaks' kingdom would essentially be the Bigbark Woods, but with a fantasy twist to it. Imagine Knothole from the Archie Sonic comics and that's what you got.

Well that's all for now!

I know I left some major Nicktoons out like Rocko's Modern Life and The Loud House, but that's because I couldn't quite think of what their kingdoms would be like.

If you have any idea or suggestions on what their kingdoms should be like, let me know in the comments.

[moongothic]

Yeah no I can't stop thinking about this. I need to get this extremely cursed theory out of my system. Let's just go.

Could Rayleigh and Shakky be Crocodile's parents?

So the thing is, I was gonna post about this like ages ago, but then I canned my original post. Because I realized that based on the timeline we have, for this theory to be true Shakky would've had to become pregnant at age 17 and given birth at 18 while Rayleigh was like 31. And needless to say, that's gross as hell. So yeah, I cancelled that original theory post because of that.

But then I realized that between Oda repeatedly treating 17 year olds as """not children""" in OP (see: Dragon literally saying Luffy isn't a child anymore at age 17), and other shit like how 16 year old Pudding was almost married to 21 year old Sanji

Like shit's creepy as hell. But alas, because Oda is Oda, it would actually fit in-universe. Like the theory is still fucking viable. Because fucking Oda, man.

And god fucking damnit the thought just keeps on haunting me. Because I am unironically curious whether or not this could be a genuine, viable theory. So yeah. I just need to get this theory out of my system. Let's just get it done with, alright

So what kind of started off this theory in my mind was remembering Buggy's off-hand comment/joke about Rayleigh being Luffy's uncle

Because that got me also thinking about some other, vaguely related theories, and like... Like we all know these theories, right;

that Luffy's mom is a Kuja (people speculate that's why Kuma sent him to Amazon Lily, that Luffy had a connection to the island)

that Crocodile has Kuja heritage (the Missing Empress is pretty much debunked but it is a popular, related and vaguely relevant theory too)

that Crocodile is Luffy's other dad

And I could not help but to wonder if these theories could somehow be combined together into one Giga Theory

And the funny thing is, we know that Rayleigh did marry a Kuja Empress, Shakky. Which actually does mean that the four theories could be mashed together. Like sure the other three theories could already be combo'd together but Buggy's theory would somehow really complement the other theories and bring them all together???

Of course, if Crocodad is real and Rayleigh turned out to be Crocodile's dad, then Buggy's comment wouldn't be fully accurate, since Rayleigh would be Luffy's other grandfather, not uncle. But it'd still be funny as hell in its own right, since the two would turn out to be blood-relatives. Like how the fuck was Buggy onto something there. Not to mention, as of now, two of Buggy's predictions in the Summit War Saga have already turned true (him becoming a Shichibukai and then a Yonkou, the only one that hasn't come true yet is him becoming Pirate King)

But indeed, if Shakky and Rayleigh were Crocodile's parents, then that would mean Crocodile would have Kuja heritage, it would mean Luffy's birthing parent was (technically) a Kuja, Buggy's joke would be kind of true and, yeah, Crocodad Real. That would be insane. We got a full fucken bingo over here

But then we have all these details to considder;

We know Shakky quit being the Kuja Empress and a pirate 42 years ago, when she moved to Sabaody and opened her bar. We don't know why she did this move, especially because at this point Rayleigh should've still been adventuring with Roger's crew

At that point, Crocodile would've been 4 years old

Based on Baby Croc's art, he isn't wearing Kuja clothes. If he had been raised in Amazon Lily then surely he would've been wearing their clothes*, but if he moved to Sabaody with Shakky and was raised there, then his get-up would fit in just fine

The trivia books claim Crocodile is a Grand Line native; regardless of if he was raised in Amazon Lily or Sabaody, both would add up

*(To be fair, if Oda had drawn Baby Croc in Kuja Clothes, that would've been a MASSIVE SPOILER to drop in an SBS. And Film Z did go out of its way to NOT include Baby Croc in the credits when all the other Baby Shichibukai were, so like, Baby Croc's art isn't Absolute Lore or anything, it is subject to change)

Indeed, if Shakky had decided to move out of Amazon Lily and went to Sabaody specifically knowing that if Roger's crew ever passed by then that would make sense, since it would mean she'd have an increased chance at seeing her husband again (if only briefly). It would also make sense if she moved out with her child and/or because she had a child, since it'd make it easier for her to ensure her child and the father could maybe get to meet and spend time together, as staying on Amazon Lily would've meant Rayleigh wouldn't have been able to enter the town even if he DID swam all the way there. (Also her options would've been to either leave her child behind or bring the child with her, and if she didn't want the kid to grow up in Amazon Lily for whatever reason then this would've been the perfect opportunity to remove that child from the island)

If Crocodile grew up in Sabaody then it could explain things like Baby Croc's serious expression and how he has a gun; there are dangerous people in Sabaody, the kid would've had to learn to defend himself from a young age (and I'm sure Shakky would've been happy to teach her child how to fight, since the Kuja are fierce warriors and being powerful is beautiful etc). It would also explain Crocodile's racism towards Jinbei, since anti-Fishman racism is a common issue in Sabaody. He would also have grown up in a place where slavery and other shit is a commonly known and seen thing, as well as the crimes of the Tenryuubito. This would explain a lot about his general attitude towards the World Government

Also, if both of Crocodile's parents were pirates, and his dad also happened to literally be on the ship of the Pirate King... Yeah it would explain his career choises. And why he had gone to Roger's execution too, since that would've been not just the Greatest Pirate In The World, but also his father's captain

And if these two were Croc's parents, it could explain his title; he could be "Sir" Crocodile because he is the son of an empress, or it could be a fucked up abbreviation from Silvers (note: it doesn't work like that in Japanese, since "sir" is like "saa" while "silvers" is "shirubaasu", but that's why I said "fucked up abbreviation")

Either way, his fullname would then be Sir Silvers Crocodile

A fitting name for a silver medalist, is it not

I just. I hate how much sense this would make

Also I'll throw this out there; don't want to put too much money on the whole "they look similar" thing due to Oda's same face syndrome, but there is an argument to be made about Oda's fem!Croc looking quite similar to Shakky, while if you squint your eyes, a younger Rayleigh could kinda look a bit like regular Croc (they even have the same haircut, awe), though it's hard to judge since we have so little art of young Rayleigh and old Rayleigh is, well, visibly much older than Crocodile

Really the only things I can think of that COULD debunk the idea are that Crocodile is MUCH TALLER than either Rayleigh or Shakky, and his bloodtype doesn't match (the two are A/AB while Croc is O). And my normal instinct would be like "if they were related then surely these details would add up because Oda is insane", but also. They are minor details. IDK man

Also, Crocodile aside. Shakky and Rayleigh have known each other for a long ass time, and Rayleigh's tendency to sleep around, it is entirely possible the two could have had a child at some point. And that really would explain why Shakky quit being an Empress. Like it doesn't even have to be Crocodile, it would just make sense if they had a kid and if that kid became the reason to Shakky quitting. The question is, who could that child then be?? And what happened to them??

[duckyfruitbat]

YoHoHo, It's a New Era of Pirating

I'm sure a lot of us have been ruminating on this lately, but first I want to draw some parallels.

Picture it, the year is 2005 and you are watching a movie you picked out with your grandma at blockbuster during your weekend visit to give your parents a god damned break from your bullshit. Relatable so far yes? You pop that disk in and sit down as grandma makes the popcorn and an odd little PSA comes up between the previews. It's the infamous pirating PSA that compares downloading films to car jacking. So what do you do? You download copious amounts of pirated music onto the computer under your fathers supervision of course, still pretty relatable right?

You have entered the world of media piracy my friend, an old tradition with a rich culture and history. The early 2000's were some wild times, piracy was at its peak, the internet was a lawless land, and the 2008 housing bubble was just around the corner, truly a glorious time.

Now needless to say, publishing companies hated piracy and were desperately trying to curb it but only through legislation through a government that didn't really care. It was already hard enough to catch one pirate so why waste resources to crack down on it. There was an attempted crackdown by the publishers but that completely failed, one infamous case was a grandma who didn't even have a computer.

This age of piracy was only stopped when Itunes and Netflix made their way online. That was only because everything was on these two websites and later also Hulu. The only people who continued to pirate were kids who didn't have money and anime fans. There were two specialized websites just for them.

Everything was going smoothly, until we get to today, now every studio has at least one streaming service and even then there is no guarantee that their own shows would even be up and they're all owned by the same five corporations. Discovery got in trouble not too long ago for deleting their own shows from their own streaming service. Disney still has a backlog to upload onto Disney+, and there are many exclusives between each site. It's very similar to what cable and satellite television was, gotta pay over a hundred dollars and you don't even watch half the channels. These streaming services are getting too specialized, sure it makes business sense especially when you already have a large library or you're just Disney, but when there are obscure TV channels trying to get their own service, you know something's wrong.

Somehow the music industry didn't go the same path, yes Spotify has its problems, especially for musicians, but it is far better than purchasing entire albums or the old piracy methods that always put your computer at risk.

The obvious consequence of all this is that piracy is once again going up once again. Why? Because it is far easier to pirate than it is to figure out which steaming service that Disney owned show you want to watch is on. The only reason Itunes and Netflix originally won was because it was more convenient to actually pay for the things you wanted to see and not have to worry about malware. That's a lesson that these corporations could benefit from again, but they are if anything stubborn.

Now because of the stubbornness of these corporations I will have a lot to talk about, specifically with all sorts of pirating methods, and some fun stories. I already talked about Tengen and their massive swinging balls of steel as they walked into the patent office to steal from Nintendo, but there is so much more. So plenty of legally dubious fun to be had!

[atiny-for-life]

Ateez's Full Storyline Explained - Part 16

Masterlist

Halazia (Unnamed World)

I'd first like to say that all the information I’m referencing here comes from the MV, Prologue and Epilogue, Hongjoong’s Q&A shorts and the MV reaction video

In short: I'm just theorizing here but let's get going

First: the name "Halazia" - it's just a combination of "Hala" from Hala Hala (which can be translated from Sanskrit to 'black mass' or 'time puzzle') and "zia" which refers to the sun -> "Be the light, oh Halazia"

looking it up, you'll find some information about the Pueblo of Zia where a very specific symbol has been used for hundreds of years among the indigenous people to represent the sun that looks like this:

You'll now also find this symbol on the flag of New Mexico but the actual natives whose ancestors created and passed it down didn't consent to this and now there's a lot of (very justified) debate regarding intellectual property - this part has nothing to do with the Ateez lore, I just thought it was interesting and important to share in case anyone was thinking of getting this symbol tattooed or sth

Theory no 1 (basically confirmed by Hongjoong in his short lore Q&A vid): we're dealing with neither Ateez, nor the Black Pirates here

The main indicator to me was the lack of Mingi's "Fix on" and Hongjoongs lil giggles before their respective rap parts (which had previously been a constant, regardless of whether they were acting as Ateez or the Black Pirates)

But aside from that, it also seems like Yunho is the leader of this group with Hongjoong being his right-hand man as opposed to the other way around (and we get to see Yeosang’s birthmark which was previously always covered)

We do still see Hongjoong wearing an armband with the Cromer logo on it - so maybe it's more like Yunho's the public-facing head of the group while Hongjoong's in charge behind the scenes

Alternate reality-wise, we're in one very close to the Z-World where the Revolution has already ended but not quite so successfully, as we can see by the city up in smoke and rubble in the background

Since we've got Yunho sitting inside a ginormous, shattered Cromer, we can assume either (A) these guys themselves have already traveled through time and alternate realities to get here (which would align with what we see in the iconic Mnet livestage with the red and black outfits) and are now stuck until they found another one to take them back home - wherever that home may be or (B) this entire room is the remainder of the Black Pirates' hideout and the Cromer was destroyed by one of them before they were captured so it wouldn't fall into the hands of the government (which could mean one of them escaped to another reality)

Side-note: We've seen such a gravitational anomaly before during Diary Film after Hongjoong first received the Cromer in the A-World and was alone in the Ateez hideout

Side-note 2: You can find my theory on why a Cromer may be intentionall shattered by someone who understands its powers here)

Going by the lyrics, they've already been here long before the Revolution and used to live as regular citizens in Strictland before they had their microchips removed by the Black Pirates - I'm largely basing that on the iconic "No more, keep control" and "No more, keep your soul" -> they want to be in charge of their own lives, to feel and have free thought as opposed to the mindless drones the chips had forced them to be

Another thing worthy of noting is that, as the bell rings, we can see Seonghwa glitch which could have several meanings: they've got hologram technology which helps them make public appearances in the daytime more safely OR (given the ominous vibes of the sound and the association with the bell) they're either not fully human (which would also explain the post-production added CGI glint we see in Jongho's eye at two separate points in the MV) or otherwise existing in this world on borrowed time.

Alternatively, the bell could also indicate that our protaganists are more powerful at certain points in time and this is a visualization of that power. As the moon phases affect the Cromer, they may also affect them.

Regarding the Black Pirate outfits we're seeing throughout the video: our protagonists here were freed by them, alongside all the other people we get to see in the plaza and abandoned mall, but without Ateez's help, they didn't manage to stay undetected so the government either captured or straight-up murdered them

Left behind and without guidance while everyone is praying for the Black Pirates return (see: the Prologue), our protagonists have now stepped up and are rebuilding the movement - though whether they're burning the Black Pirates' outfits as a funeral ritual, out of frustration and anger due to feeling abandoned... or because the tattered clothes were strung up that way by the government to scare off further acts of rebellion Vlad-the-Impaler style which would make this a symbol of defiance, is unclear

Regardless, many of the other citizens who were freed seem willing to join their cause and their current mission seems to be to take down this anti-gravity orb

I can only make a rather baseless guess as to what the purpose of these things is but since it's actively rising here, it seems to be something newly installed that's meant to rise above city-level

The central government presumably built and installed it so maybe it can send out some kind of pulse or signal to regain control over the population - after all, the chips seem to have only had the link cut but weren't removed so re-establishing the link could be possible as long as the hardware wasn't fully fried (which would've probably needed harsher, more painful for the skin interference but what the heck do I know about this world's technological advances)

Either way, to me, that would explain both the fear in the lyrics about returning to their prior state of being pre-awakening, as well as why San was so ready to risk it all to break this thing

Either way, we've got Yeosang bringing in the chains to tie this thing up

Based on the skyline compared to the one from the prologue, it seems like the thick smoke pillars might be originating from the crash sites of the other orbs which would mean they already brought down all the other ones successfully and have now reached their last stop

They wrap the chains around the orb, tie it up all nice and neatly (which must've been a pain in the ass to do since that thing is floating in mid air, makes lightweight shit in its vicinity float and is well, the shape of a super smooth ball) and all start pulling together up until everyone seemingly leaves San to finish the job by himself

To me, there could be multiple reasons for this: (1) it was always part of the plan (highly unlikely imo), (2) everyone but San lost hope this was gonna work out since they're already exhausted af from doing this several times before and don't seem to have made all that much progress and maybe they think they've already done enough since this is seemingly the last orb left, (3) San convinced everyone to leave as they were working/everyone but him got too scared to continue because Android Guardians or another government entity were underway and would've killed or captured them if they were caught

Either way, it all ends with the orb evaporating the moment it collides with San as if his existence somehow canceled out the orb's. While this is very likely to be a creative decision since no one wants to see this human embodiment of sunshine get crushed to death, it could also mean San is still alive if he possesses abilities that go beyond a regular human's or if the orb isn't made up of regular matter/material.

Moving on to the Prologue and Epilogue:

Aside from what I already covered, there are also quite a few other things I want to bring up regarding what we get to see in these two bonus videos, starting with the numbers behind Hongjoong in the Prologue here (which were also pointed out by him in the Making Of video)

You can put these numbers (22152984) and decode them with A1Z26 in which case you'd get this (yes, I still use the Gravity Falls: Break the Code website for this kinda stuff - I refuse to be judged for it):

While this is rather nonsensical, it is quite close to "Bluebird" which would fit the lyrics but it's still just a lil bit unsatisfying since, properly encoded, it should have been "2-12-21-5-2-9-18-4", meaning they forgot a "1" twice.

Regardless, I couldn't find anything better - it can't be coordinates, there's no cypher like this for Hangul that I could find, and using Base64 only gets you "my8" which doesn't make too much sense but Ateez are 8 members so that's nice, I guess.

The first thing that pops up in my search results when I look up the numbers is "Buy 22152984 from Oxygen Electronics" by the way - shout out to life support machine parts you can order online (no affiliation, though I do hope they're an ethical company)

Regarding the numbers, I'll leave it at that for now but if I ever find something that makes more sense, I'll update this!

Ah yes, the mysterious blonde person that pops up toward the end of the Prologue and disappears in the blink of an eye as someone walks past

Seonghwa is the only one who takes note of them and, based on his neutral expression, it doesn't seem to be the first time he's seen them

Are they the Witness? I do think so but we'll come back to it in a moment.

Skipping ahead to the Prologue uploaded yesterday, we're opening with a shot of the bluebird we've already gotten to see in the Prologue and which has also been referenced in the lyrics - it's a symbol of reclaiming freedom, of escaping your shackles, of finding your voice and using it. They've now made it. They've chosen freedom. They've chosen to fight.

The bird's path now guides Seonghwa through the abandoned mall where the orb was brought down and San was sacrificed. It whistles a lil tune and disappears near a lone white-clad figure we've seen before.

Last seen among a small group on the rooftop at the end of the MV, our blondie stands by themselves again, though the others aren't far as we'll soon see

Since the mission is now over, Seonghwa let's his curiosity win and follows the figure up a dark staircase, letting his flashlight guide him

He finds the group of four from the rooftop standing in a dark room against the backdrop of the smoking skyline behind the large windows - they were waiting for him

A white flash, rolling thunder and they're gone. Just like after Yeosang broke the Cromer, we also got to witness the Cromer's powers here. This marks the third Cromer, meaning these four are from yet another reality and they've now become Witnesses of our protagonists' achievements.

They also left behind a departing gift: a silver bracelet engraved with the words "Be Free"

Like A-World's Seonghwa, it seems the blonde Witness has also gotten inspired by their world's version of the dancing girl (whom I theorize to be Left Eye's daughter) and they've now left behind this bracelet, hoping it'll inspire this world's Seonghwa the way it inspired them

[skymagpie]

What about Top 5 games/books/series/movies/etc you would call "underappreciated" for what they do?

Hm, my view of things might be skewed because I do feel like these things are popular only because I am in the circles that talk about them and I think they are generally not that popular, or at least not as popular as stuff like League, Arcane, WoW, TES etc. This also excludes niche things like old books, plays and films that I picked up from uni as I don't feel like having people quiz me why I like the works of some "problematic" guy from 50-100 years ago.

Subnautica - this is literally one of the best game series I've ever played. It has a very simple, but amazing story, a lot of heart and soul, the aesthetic and the feeling of the game are unmatched and the gameplay is very fun. If you are scared of the depths, its a terror game, but the fact that the story is so heartfelt makes up for you being terrified of the world. In fact, the fact that it can be very scary sometimes just adds to the story. It's a perfect sync of gameplay and storytelling. It's a cheap game too with no micro-transactions and such, so it's a little jewel in a sea of crap they've been releasing lately.

Dishonored - Yes, I think Dishonored is not as popular as it should be. Dishonored is amazing, from aesthetics to writing (especially in the first game), to world building and gameplay. The first game is a masterpiece despite the fact that the story it tells is very simple and straightforward, so much so that sometimes it's even funny. The 2nd game threw the ball when it comes to story, but the characters, the aesthetic and world it built is still unmatched. It's absolutely beautiful and it awakens something in me whenever I think about it. For me Dishonored (and Subnautica above) are like a vacation by the seaside that cures depression.

Pirates of the Caribbean - These films might feel like they are popular because you see them plastered on children's notebooks and backpacks, but they are soooo underground because they were popular some 15 years ago and now most people forgot they existed aside from Jack Sparrow and his pop culture influence. However the first film is a masterpiece and the two other that follow are excellent and bring so many new things to this type of storytelling. They made the Pirate genre so good and it's sad that the genre itself died out with them. The 2 last films are not so good, but I think the culture already shifted away from pirates and that probably just added to the lack of quality and passion put into them (Disney just thought they can ride off the success of the first three, not realizing what actually made them so successful). However, much like the three things above, the feelings the first three films bring is so beautiful that I do recommend for people to give them a watch (or a re-watch) and experience some of that joy for themselves. The following two are very much a subtype or parts of bigger fandoms and not things on their own~

The Warcraft novels - this is a more of a "subtype" of something being popular, but I don't think the Warcraft novels get enough attention within the Warcraft community. While a lot of games tend to release books to up sales and often put key story elements in them, however the books are not as good and they do feel like they were made just because every game needed to have a book from 2016 and onward. The Warcraft books on the other hand feel like they are an essential part of the story and not just a cashgrab. While they are not all good, sometimes the writing is lacking, they are absolutely fun to read and people who like the Warcraft lore should not overlook them. For me they give me the vibe of the cheap little fantasy booklets I used to read on vacation when I was a child. And some deal with pretty heavy topics and themes you would not expect in a "video game book".

The Zed comic - obviously and the most expected response, while League doesn't have a lot of lore (even if people pretend it does, it doesn't, play TES or WoW to see what capital L-ore is), people know Arcane is like the peak of League's story. I however think that the Zed comic is good enough to make it at least in the runner ups to Arcane's 1st, 2nd and 3rd prize. It's a good comic, yes the style is in that ugly Marvel fashion which is 90% of the visual charm for me, and despite the League community moaning that it's not a good story, it's in fact a good story. The plot works, the characters work, the story build upon century old premises of brothers fighting for the love of their father and it offers these characters so much more than what we see in the rest of the content for them. This comic made these characters actual characters, and the community either ignores or straight up dislikes it out of reasons only understandable to them.

BONUS: Greymoor was a great ESO DLC and received a lot of flack from the ESO community. The criticism that it killed gay characters is the only valid criticism. Pretty much everything else boiled down to "It has a weak plot :///" that was never elaborated by anyone in any capacity. It was a great Chapter, it had beautiful aesthetic and a unique feeling even if bringing back a zone from Skyrim and it had one of the best TES villains in general. For me it was the last true ESO expansion that just really captivated me even though I like the ones that came after.

[adultswim2021]

Space Ghost Coast to Coast #75: “Fire Ant” | December 10, 1999 | S06E07

Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Even though I’m currently visiting another state and sleeping in a different house, I still do all I can to make sure Space Ghost Week trucks along without interruption. It sure beats speaking to my family. 

Fire Ant! Another “special” “experimental” “episode” of “Space Ghost” “Coast to Coast”. This one features Conan O’Brien and, more famously, a special little fire ant that becomes Space Ghost’s friend. This is a pretty normal episode, as a matter of fact; just Space Ghost talking to Conan O’Brien while weird jokes and cutaways happen. Suddenly, Space Ghost gets distracted by a little ant on the floor and decides to follow it. Then, he does, for roughly half of the episode’s running time. This is a double-length episode, by the way, so he wordlessly follows this ant for the length of a normal episode. 

Wordlessly? Well, he does hum and he sorta starts singing to himself and he sorta says words there a little bit. He not only follows the ant across the studio floor, but also outside, and against various backdrops. At one point, Space Ghost even follows the ant in front of Sealab, making Sealab 2021 an actual canonical Space Ghost spin-off. Eventually Space Ghost follows the ant all the way home. He complains to the ant’s oversized parent or guardian that the ant bit him. Space Ghost is attacked and chased off while he yells “YOUR SON IS A MORON”. End of episode. 

I never did see the premiere of this, even though I was a fairly regular viewer this season. I don’t think I saw the full-length Fire Ant until the DVD came out. I almost didn’t believe that the 30 minute version actually existed. Despite this episode’s reputation as a conceptual episode, my familiarity with it was with the 15-minute version, which cuts out Space Ghost’s quiet and patience-trying trek across the universe. It doesn’t necessarily feel like it was missing anything to those of us blissfully unaware of the full version. I always thought this was an exceptional episode even when watching the condensed cut. The ant-following stretch of the show only makes me fonder of it. Now that I own the full episode you’ll never catch me fast-forwarding or subbing it for the short version. This is art, goddamnit.

I fucking love the bit where Space Ghost complains that he was rejected for his pitch about a TV show where Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny were teenagers, and he was a teenager too, and they solve mysteries, and also they were pirates. The idea of pitching a teenage Daffy and Bugs is already very funny, but the joke peaks when Space Ghost casually mentions including himself hanging out with them, also as a teenager. It goes a little too far with the pirate thing. Piracy is no laughing matter. You wouldn’t steal a car...

This episode features an illuminating DVD extra: the Conan Raw Interview. Conan has to be one of the least-flappable Space Ghost guests ever. The problem with that is, you get so few moments that feel spontaneous; Conan answers every question very calmly and goes with the flow so much that he almost feels completely scripted. The show wants odd, awkward moments to play with more than anything else. There is so much stuff in here that went unused. I literally felt myself get frustrated on the show’s behalf; sensing certain questions that would have disarmed other guests and watching as Conan level-headedly answer them made me groan in places.

Conan seems like a fun guy to talk to and joke with, but if I were filming our conversation for use in my retro-scripted, post-modern superhero-themed talk show spoof I would be tearing my hair out. Just furrow your goddamn brow once, motherfucker. That said, the very few moments where Conan comes off human must’ve formed the entire basis for the interview. It’s on Youtube if you look for it. Search “Conan Raw Interview Space Ghost”, probably!

I heard they showed the full episode as part of the 2023 April Fools programming stunt. I didn't know that. Neat!

MAIL BAG

KON writes:

I don't remember if it was Table Read or Curling Flower Spaces, but one of those episodes had the first instance of "damn" in a Space Ghost episode... hugely scandalous at the time. Oh, and HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!

Hey! Happy Thanksgiving to all of my pals and homers. I did not realize this! Curling Flower Space has "damned lie", but Table Read has them repeating "damn" a few times because it's contained in a contentious line of dialogue they are discussing.

A moment similar to this was I remember an episode of Ren & Stimpy where they repeat the word "crappy" over and over, which for some reason is a word I deemed exactly one notch worse than "damn" and "hell" in my own understanding of the hierarchy of swears. It's nice seeing standards and practices like this thaw. I wish I knew to appreciate it at the time.

[sweaterkittensahoy]

I threatened a 40-minute video of annoyance with this, but I'm lazy, so here's a time-stamped dick pull instead:

It's the catchiest song in the whole fucking movie, and it does nothing to earn any love or devotion from any version of its audience.

0:36: "you got yourselves on the front page." accurate.

0:40: "So what, you get your picture in the pape, so what's that get you, huh?" -- A fair question from a kid who understands via selling papes how quickly headlines change. Which is established earlier in the film in a way that kids were meant to pick up on.

0:41: "What are you talkin' about, huh?" / (various newsies saying 'shut up you've been in a bad mood, etc.) / "You're glum and dumb. What's the matter with you? You're in the papes you're famous! You're famous, you get anything you want!" -- Previous scenes have set up that the Newsies understand the rules of Yellow Journalism, so to have Race get annoyed that another seasoned Newsie questions why it matters they're on the front page when they all know the front page will change basically instantly is to undercut what we've already been told the Newsies know themselves. Also, this has been made clear to the kids who are watching who undoubtedly picked it up.

0:58: "And that's what's so great about New York!" this is meant to show that New York is great because anyone can be famous for one edition. But we've seen the Newsies understand that this means nothing in the greater story. Having any Newsie in this scene claim front page status makes anyone famous doesn't work with the story that's already been set up. And, again, this has been made clear for THE KIDS IN THE AUDIENCE.

0:59: "A Pair of new shoes with matching laces" / "A permanent box at Cheapshead Races." / "A porcelin tub with boiling water" -- growing up in the early 90s, I'm sure I identified with the idea of new shoes with matching laces (it was a THING), but I sure as shit didn't have any sense of why having an easier time gambling would make a fellow kid happy (because I wasn't raised by OR a degenerate child gambler). And while I happened to grow up in a situation where I did NOT always have hot water on tap, the phrasing here didn't provide any explanation about why I should care about someone wanting a tub with BOILING WATER.

1:08: "A Saturday night with the Mayor's daughter!" This movie was aimed, at the oldest, towards 10-12 year olds. My best wishes to anyone who felt a tingle in their jeans at this moment and spent many years wondering why they wanted to fuck pirates.

1:13: "Look at me, I'm the King of New York." Vinnie from Dougie Howser MD was why I watched this movie the moment I could get my hands on it in my own home, and he delivers. Thank you, Max Casella. You did great.

1:22: "Nobbing with all the muckety-mucks…" I respect Christian Bale as an actor. He is SO BAD in this movie. He can't sing or dance for shit, and I wanna backhand whoever cast him in this role.

1:34: The Newsies fighting over the paper when the movie has etablished they know being on the front page doens't mean shit is a fucking problem.

1:38: "A courdrory suit with fitted knickers / a mezzanine seat to see the flickers / Havana cigars that cost a quarter" Are you just listing shit that no kid in the early 90s is going to be able to understand as important or were you all too high on coke to give a shit???

1:47: "An Editor's desk for the star reporter" See previous comment. No fucking child in any point knows what an editor is, why that desk is important, or what a star reporter is. Disney was just coked out at this point.

1:53: Bull Pullman put his whole cunt into this performance, and I love that for him. The script never could decide how much emphasis he should have, but he showed up in every scene as Cool Uncle Cunt and showed them. Good for him.

2:01: Calm down every spotlight-stealer we knew in high school.

2:10: "Proud yet humble, he's the king of New York." -- Max Casella proving why I loved this movie when young.

2:18: "Tomorrow they might wrap fishes in it / but I was a star for one whole minute!" Proving--AGAIN--that these kids know how fragile the news cycle is, yet we're supposed to think they're all excited about making the front page????

2:24: The dancing is in no way with the beat of the song, and I am pretty sure my molars no longer exist because I ground them to dust.

2:32: They are now in sync with the beat, but my molars are still fucking dust.

2:37: This is a kid power movie. Pullman shouldn't be jumping on a table to sing along.

2:45: No kid is going to appreciate a sit-down game of dance-and-slap, and Pullman joining in is further disconnection from the overall kid power theme of the movie. He's supposed to be their ally, not their equal. It's a mistake to have him be part of this moment.

2:49: "Once a piker" -- No fucking child in the early 90s is going to know that "Piker" is an insult about a "simplistic" person who thinks they have more impact on business than they actually hold.

[abbinurmel]

I have been agonizingly and repeatedly where my bf is right now, where it comes to nurturing people who are close to you and whom do not try to directly abuse or affect you in shitty ways themselves, but their constant personal life dramas and how they abuse alcohol/self sabotage out of nilhilism and stubboness, causes you to wanna obsess over taking care of them or stepping into their drama uninvited as mediator w. 1) the desire to fix their problems for them just out of good friendship in exchange for their many kindnesses and 2) the fear of them abandoning you or God forbid throwing themself off a cliff if they never recover.

And I don't wanna both sound hypocritical/pedantic and also thougtless- but there's a diff when it's internet friends vs. irl. And one part of me argued the long distance friend with a problem is more unhealthy worse and more without point to obsess with. The other hand, irl indirectly toxic drama friend, has actual immediate impact that actually takes itself into your life.

My point was forgotten here. I guess I just feel weary and sad and sorry for these people all involved.

And. Yea. I know. I can never have right to judge others or how we all cope with our pain. We all struggle with inner mental illness or barriers and I just hafta accept as adults we are only able t b responsible for ourself and we all have our own paths to take. I have my own toxic addictions too.

......But I'll say the hot take anyway.. cos fuckit.

....drinking abuse is really really fuckin frustratingly dumb especially when you are over 25. What even are you fucking doing, treating your angst or life problems this way. You need a coping mechanism to escape life, instead of actually taking your inner demons and working thru them? Modern life has provided you with an endless supply of vices and addictions to give a cheap hit of sweet dopamine or a distracted altered state. Tiktok, sex chat, table top gaming, gambling apps, doomscrolling, cook something, go to a sex dungeon, play Animal Crossing, write Animal Crossing fanfic, write tawdry and/or tawdry Animal Crossing fanfic and/or wank yourself into a coma, WE don't hafta know!-

Ffs...weed's fucking LEGAL now in over 29 states in the US, you can dye your hair and paint your nails in any color conceivable and you can cosplay as someone else and you can dress however you goddamn want cos in the world of Amazon you can consume any possible product and shop addict yourself into being broke. You can listen to any music now, watch nearly any TV program or film of the last 100 years, and read almost any literature or comic or play any videogame that is possible to buy or pirate. You can marathon now or binge in ways that wasn't possible even less than 20 years ago. You can roleplay as any possible gender animal or age you could want and the damned endless amount of hobbies and skills you could pour focus in....

There are a million other unhealthy but still less.unhealthy, more creatively degenerate habits and vices you could partake in. You could vape in almost any flavor. You could destroy private property and invent cool tag slogans or mascots to graffiti on your neighborhood. You could steal from corporate stores, it's practically cool now to morally do. You could peddle absurd misinfo, draw porn, get into crypto, get into ASMR,.get into tattoos, piercings, absurd fad diets, you could do illegal drugs that at least make you FEEL EUPHORIC INSTEAD OF SHIT ANYWAY (which disclaimer no, you shouldn't actually do them but if you're gonna do shit anyway-) I hear Molly, Ecstasy, light shrooms, meth, coke and such are fun. You could at least imbibe some dumb shit that fucks you up but doesn't make you a whiny,.moaning, miserable, bitter sonuvabitch who just mopes about why do they still not feel good and you already knew would never made you feel good, emotional or physically, and then throw up. What is your fuckin aim here. Are you stressed and tired, you wanna pass out? Take a fucking regular depression nap then. Or take sleeping pills, or some Benadryl, or go have some.really intense good sex, and let that pass you out. You need to relax your muscles and shut off racing thoughts? Either get a prescription from a doctor or just drink warm milk and take a hot bath like all the fuckin rest of us. Unless you are a broke and homeless person with no hope of access to any material resources or pleasures or amounts of self care without being granted those valuable resources from the outside, or you are someone in a 3rd world country with access to not a single one of these many amenities, options, vices, or informative resources on how to cope with problems, for mutherfucking fucking sake, WHAT are you DOING.

[justforbooks]

“I always felt like the kid that sat at the foot of the gods,” said Treat Williams, who has died aged 71 following a road accident. And it is true that the first decade of his movie career was dominated by one high-calibre director after another.

John Sturges put the doughy-faced, darkly handsome actor toe-to-toe with Michael Caine in The Eagle Has Landed (1976), adapted from Jack Higgins’s novel about a plot to kidnap Winston Churchill. Miloš Forman gave Williams his first lead, as the hippie Berger in the screen version (1979) of the 1967 musical Hair. He was an ill-tempered army corporal in Steven Spielberg’s wartime comedy 1941 (also 1979). Sidney Lumet drew on his cocksure swagger and his air of moral ambiguity in Prince of the City (1981), a thriller about police corruption. And Sergio Leone cast him as a union boss in the gangster epic Once Upon a Time in America (1984).

It was Lumet’s film that announced Williams as a formidable talent, with a special aptitude for ensemble playing. He starred as Danny Ciello, a corrupt drugs squad detective who becomes increasingly isolated as he informs on his colleagues in the elite Special Investigations Unit. The character was based on the detective Robert Leuci. Williams lived with Leuci while preparing for the part. He also attended drug busts and hung out with police officers. “By the time we started rehearsals, I was thinking like a cop,” he said.

Janet Maslin in the New York Times commended the “playful, arrogant, effectively brazen quality” of his portrayal. Equally integral is the seam of self-disgust that runs through Ciello, first when he is exploiting his power over drug addicts and dealers, then when he turns on his own kind.

Williams went on to display a menacing eroticism in Smooth Talk (1985), directed by Joyce Chopra and based on Joyce Carol Oates’s 1966 short story Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been? When he turns up in the second half of the film as Arnold Friend, a vision of adult masculine prowess that the teenage protagonist (Laura Dern) seems to have been yearning for, he is simultaneously ridiculous, alluring and intimidating.

Williams was born in Stamford, Connecticut, and raised in nearby Rowayton, the son of Richard, a pharmaceuticals executive, and Marian (nee Andrews), an antiques dealer who also ran a sailing school. He was educated at Kent school, Connecticut, where he first began acting, and at Franklin & Marshall College, Pennsylvania. He studied in New York at the Actors Studio, where his classmates included Mickey Rourke, and was hired as understudy to four parts (including Doody, played on stage by John Travolta) in the Broadway production of Grease. Eventually he took over the lead role of Danny Zuko, which he played for three years.

Having already appeared on stage in the London production of The Ritz, Terrence McNally’s comedy about a hounded businessman hiding out in a gay bath-house, he was then cast in Richard Lester’s 1976 movie version.

Auditioning for the film of Hair was a lengthy and arduous process. During his 12th audition, he recalled: “I started removing all of my clothing. At the end of the monologue, I was standing stark naked in front of them … They applauded, and I told them: ‘This is all that I’ve got, I don’t know what else I can give you.’” It was enough.

Discouraged when Hair, 1941 and the comedy Why Would I Lie? (1980) continued a run of box-office flops, he began an alternative career flying planes in Los Angeles. A call from Lumet, who was looking for an un-starry and largely unknown cast for Prince of the City, put him back on track.

He continued to alternate between film and theatre, following Lumet’s picture by appearing in Ohio in Carlo Goldoni’s farce The Servant of Two Masters and on Broadway taking over from Kevin Kline as the Pirate King in The Pirates of Penzance. On television, he played the boxer Jack Dempsey in the TV movie Dempsey (1983), Stanley Kowalski – opposite Ann-Margret as Stella – in A Streetcar Named Desire (1984), the title role in J. Edgar Hoover (1987) and the super-agent Michael Ovitz, co-founder of CAA, in The Late Shift (1996), for which he was Emmy-nominated.

In Things to Do in Denver When You’re Dead (1995), he played a thug working as an undertaker and using corpses as punch-bags. He was also in the noir-ish Mulholland Falls, the superhero adventure The Phantom (both 1996) and the thriller The Devil’s Own (1997), starring Harrison Ford and Brad Pitt.

Better than these were two projects that displayed his versatility: the monster movie Deep Rising (1998), in which he does battle with sharp-fanged sea-serpents, and The Deep End of the Ocean (1999), starring Williams and Michelle Pfeiffer as a couple reunited with their son many years after he was kidnapped.

He starred in Woody Allen’s Hollywood Ending (2002), played James Franco’s father in Danny Boyle’s 127 Hours, and the writer Mark Schorer in Howl (both 2010), which also starred Franco as Allen Ginsberg. He had a recurring role on the series Everwood (2002-06), as a widowed neurosurgeon settling in Colorado with his children, and on the cop drama Blue Bloods (2016-23). He also appeared in many Hallmark channel productions, including the series Chesapeake Shores (2016-22), as well as the Netflix musical Dolly Parton’s Christmas on the Square (2020).

He is survived by his wife, Pam Van Sant, whom he married in 1988, and their children, Gill and Ellie.

🔔 Richard Treat Williams, actor, born 1 December 1951; died 12 June 2023

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com

[toonabby]

Welp... (#FireDavidZaslav)

I never though of making this, but a few hours ago, Coyote Vs Acme, the most highly anticipated movie to come out the Looney Tunes, has been shelved and would not be releasing at all.

When I heard this I was confused and disappointed: "Why would they cancel this movie?" I thought to myself. "Oh right, TAXES and MONEY!" I was already aware of Zaslav's mistreatment of animation but this made me sad in particular considering that the movie was completed by the time it was cancelled.

All of those animators that have put their sweat and guts into this film for over two years. Gone. By contrast, the universally-reviled Velma got green light for a second season, while 2023's The Flash not only somehow survived cancellation, but also kept Ezra Miller - who had a lot of criminal activity throughout 2022 - as the titular character in spite of the potential legal trouble they'll get for having a convicted criminal in a role of a mainstream film, let alone still continue acting.

As I said in a comment on a YT video, any hope I had with WB and especially Zaslav is pretty much gone. Hell, I would argue that any hope I had with this year is gone. Between the abysmal beginning (the aforementioned Velma, the career-destroying scandals of Justin Roiland and Elliot Gindi, with the latter having only stared voiced acting for five months before the allegations came out, and the widespread, messy but otherwise pointless Hogwarts Legacy drama), the doubling down of Hollywood and especially WB's maltreatment of animation, several formally revered people getting exposed left and right, and tech giants making inane decisions, most notable Elon's takeover of Twitter and Reddit's API Changes, its honestly not a hyperbole or an exaggeration to say I despise this year. Not to an extent of 2020, but still pretty bad, and 2023 sucking was something I've been genuinely dreading when December of last year came.

And speaking of last year, this day marks the unfortunate first anniversary of the controversy DeviantArt got into when they decided to implement AI into their platform known for art made by actual people, NOT machines. Is every Nov. 11 going forward gonna have a company screwing over their audience and employees?

If there's one silver lining to this devastating situation, it's that the producers of said film would be able to watch it on private screenings next week. That, and the potential content leaks of said film.

At this rate, WB is dangerously close to becoming the ActiBliz of animation - a company full of greedy scumbags who take delight in screwing over their audience and their people.

To close this post off, I will no longer be supporting WB and its related content from now on (at least legally). I'll be removing my profile off of HBO Max (or rather Max) and deleting the service on my TV. I'll also remove every video from the Cartoon Network YouTube channel off my watch history even though they had nothing to do with this situation, I just don't like associating myself with a scummy company regardless of how I feel about the products themselves. That obviously doesn't mean I automatically hate anything by WB nor do I want to remove them from my history, I'm just saying is that I don't want to support anything by WB if that means I'm profiting of from the company. I'll also delete/private my fan art commemorating the company's centennial, because as I said before, I'm not respecting a company that treats its own works like disposable tools while giving other works a slap on the wrist in spite of their abysmal quality. Talk about double standards...

TL;DR: WB cancels a film that has already been completed and everyone is restoring to pirating their content, including me.

EDIT: Okay, changed my mind. I'm ONLY going to delete everything from JUST Warner Bros., the company, not the products they own. That doesn't mean I WON'T be deleting anything that celebrates the company though.

EDIT 2: Even though I'm not supporting WB anymore, I'm keeping my 100th anniversary post (at least on this site) for "archival/historical" purposes.

[girlbossblackbeard]

Okay the brain rot worms are already hard at work painstakingly breaking down every single letter and piece of punctuation in this synopsis and here is the word vomit we've got so far:

-"Stede reunites with his crew" which we mostly already knew BUT this means there doesn't appear to be any time jump between last season and this season. We're diving right back in where we left off.

-"and go searching for Blackbeard and the Revenge" so they somehow acquire a ship (I'm assuming) in the very first ep?? And set out to find Blackbeard. We don't know what headspace Stede is in when they embark on this mission, whether it's about finding a lost love or saving Frenchie, Jim, and Lucius, or maybe (and most likely) both! I'm guessing Stede will be in a "I can fix him" sort of mode bc he doesn't know the extent of Ed's regression. I'm also envisioning maybe a scene at Jackie's tavern in order to get a ship?? Where are they gonna get this fucking ship??????? Or maybe they're just collecting intel from other pirates in this ep??????? EDIT: ALSO the separation of going searching for "Blackbeard AND the Revenge" makes me think it's definitely the "both" option I proposed earlier. I think Stede and the crew have their own missions/motivations for tracking Ed and Co. down, Stede wanting to get back to Ed and the crew wanting to get back to their family/home and also beat some serious ass for the marooning, which I'm very curious to see if that has any impact on tension/intra-crew fighting!

-"Jim does their best to escape their kidnappers" okay 1) I cannot fucking WAIT to see Jim kick some serious Izzy and/or Ed ass if that's in the cards for us, but maybe it's more of a sneak away situation? Also note the lack of a Frenchie mention, my guess is he's too scared to try to escape and/or maybe they discover Lucius in the first ep and Frenchie agrees to stay behind to help feed him? Why isn't Frenchie mentioned in this part at all????? Also "does their BEST to escape" really does make me think there's some kinda duel, this wasn't just a plan thwarted before it could begin, it sounds like Jim put their blood, sweat, and tears into getting off that ship, but-

-"but the Revenge is in for a surprise" soooo my first thought was "surprise, it's Lucius who isn't dead!" but then I realized I don't think his presence would put a stop to Jim's plan. I'm guessing the Revenge gets ambushed by another ship, either a pirate/privateer or the navy for essentially draft-dodging, and that forces Jim to stay behind and help fight for the Revenge. Hell, maybe it's even Hornigold who's come to try to take in Blackbeard since he actually did turn privateer in real life, but part of me thinks that's more of a s3 plot than s2. It could be that Stede and the crew manage to catch up with them already, but I really think they're gonna keep Ed and Stede separated for at LEAST 2 eps before we get a reunion simply because that's one of the basic tenets of storytelling in film, for the most part. Gotta milk that heartache for all it's worth so the payoff is even sweeter when it comes.

Idk man!!!!! This show makes my brain turn into chef boyardee beefaroni!!!!! Share all your thoughts on this post below please!!!!!