#i’m wrecked after this parallel

[crosshairslongasslegs]

OHHH

[turtleblogatlast]

[ cw: dismemberment / ]

I think a lot about how Leo’s rescue could have easily ended in him losing a leg as the portal snaps shut on the Krang still clutching the limb, or, alternatively, only having Leo’s right arm make it out, still held dearly in his brother’s hand as the rest of Leo is left behind. (The latter hits even harder, as it directly parallels his future self in the worst of ways.)

I think a lot about how so many things could have gone wrong during the course of the movie with even a little bit of a change, but it really is harrowing how much of a coin-flip the entirety of the Prison Dimension rescue was.

[king-crawler]

I was reviewing some footage and . I SWEAR TO GOD. THERE'S A REASON FOR EVERYTHING IN THIS MOVIE.

This part is subtle foreshadowing/setup that Vanellope's glitch can travel to others.

Taffyta is completely fine because her code is stable and she's native to the game, meaning she's easily correctable. (speculating)

Turbo isn't able to recover because he's not native to Sugar Rush and his code is a tangled mess. The game doesn't know how to "correct" him after an error. (Rip bozo)

And both are from yanking someones arm in attempt to defend herself. Taffyta trying to hurt her emotionally and Candy trying to hurt her physically. Man.

ALSO VIDEO EDITION BECAUSE I COULDNT DECIDE WHICH FORMAT I LIKED MORE

[zombee]

I feel like the luckiest Our Flag Means Death fan in the world after the season 2 finale. By a series of incredible circumstances - including a significant metatextual realization that came in at the 11th hour - it was close to perfect for me.

This essay has everything. Completely normal behavior over a television series. Steven Universe references. The David Jenkins School of Whatever is Best for the Bit. Humbling catharsis.

First: this piece does not exist with the central thesis of “it’s okay to not like something but that’s not the same thing as it being bad.” I feel like thousands of words have already been written on this since Thursday, so I’m going to try to not get too in depth on that.

Second, cards on the table, because it’s relevant and I don’t want to waste your time if this is going to sour your ability to hear me out: I’m an Izzy Canyon hater. For MANY reasons, but from way before the concept of the Canyon existed, (some) Izzy fans pinged me in the same way as Snape/Kylo Ren fans did, and before May 2022 was over I went from genuinely enjoying Izzy’s character and place in the narrative to hating him because his fans made it impossible for me to enjoy him anymore.

(SOME! of his fans. Please don’t keep making me say this, although I’m not going to talk about the Canyon directly anymore after this. I know there are a ton of normal Izzy Enjoyers and even Canyonites, I am literally friends with many of them, please take this all in the good faith it’s intended and if you’re not One Of The Bad Ones then you’re fine! I very carefully don’t go anti-Izzy on main, and when I stopped enjoying his character, I stopped writing him into fics. I’m not trying to be a dick, I just want to be honest. Anyway.)

The season 2 finale made me weep over Izzy Goddamn hands.

ALL season long, I was disgruntled. All season long. I really, truly, DEEPLY appreciated what they were doing with his character and arc, I thought it was wildly on brand for the themes of community/queerness in the show, I saw the vision, I liked it!!! But. I wanted a fucking apology, yall. I needed three seconds of “sorry I called you a slur, Ed :/” and that would have been enough. But I had to let it go. It was poisoning my enjoyment of the whole season, which I loved with very little exception (not none!) and I just had to let it go. I wasn’t getting an apology. That didn’t negate what they were doing with his character.

Yall. They withheld the apology on purpose.

THIS FUCKING SHOW!!!

Let’s go back a bit. I was at the episode 6 + 7 screening, and the breakup shook me. Probably a LOT more than if I had watched it alone in bed at 3am on my laptop - five days of no sleep after NYCC, lots of emotions, seeing it on a big screen with a hundred other intense fans, etc etc - but I did see other folks reacting in parallel ways to me when the episodes aired to the regular public, so maybe I would have felt the same way. Regardless, I was mad at Stede and to a lesser extent Ed. I NEEDED AN APOLOGY FOR THAT FISH LINE. I needed it! “Whativah” autocorrects to “WHATIVAH” in my phone. I was going through it.

(When I rewatched the episode when it aired it was not nearly as bad as I remember, lol)

So now the episode 8 screeners go out and the reviews drop and I think I catch one half-glimpse of a “What a heartbreaking ending!” kind of snippet, and some of my friends who are spoiler fiends unintentionally drop little hints about similar ideas (devastating/heartbreaking/split the fandom) type shit.

And I was a fucking WRECK! about it.

I do love this whole show with my whole chest. I do!!! But I’m not rotted because this is an excellent television show, I’m rotted because two old men kiss each other! On the MOUTH!!! in an excellent television show. You get it, right? I’ve written 700,000 words across almost 100 fics and 98% of them are dedicated to those two men falling in love in different universes. 

So it just did not even occur to me the “heartbreak/devastation/fandom split” would be about anything but Gentlebeard.

Another piece of this that was fucking me up - David Jenkins and his “satisfactory” ending biz. My brain was reacting like this show was ENDING ending, even if I knew logically! that this is just season 2!!! And I wasn’t ready for that, because what if it wasn’t personally satisfying, and I’m a mess about it? Why was I so worried about not liking it? I’d liked the whole season! Even if they didn’t nail the landing I wasn’t going to stop writing fic or hanging out with my pirate community & friends. 

…is what I kept trying to tell myself, but the way anxiety disorders work is funny like that lol. What if I did stop writing fic and hanging out in pirate spaces? That would hurt much more than a show I like disappointing me. And for anyone who’s having that experience with ofmd s2, I’m so very, very sorry. It sucks and that’s where my epiphany came from on Wednesday before the finale.

Because it has happened to me before.

I flit from hyperfocus to hyperfocus, as ya do when you’re spicy, but the last thing to get its hooks in me PROPERLY like pirates was Steven Universe. And I did NOT like the way the regular season ended!!! (I actually really did like most of Future; that’s not what I mean. I mean season 5). I don’t like how they handled the Diamonds, tldr; I think the scope of their villainy got too out of hand, and I was left grieving the thing that had meant enough to me I ran a fan convention for four years based around it. 

Side note: imagine if I had channeled the hyperfocus of almost a million words of fanfiction into an American OFMD con instead. We could have made magic :( I did consult with Our Con Means Death though so I am at least a teeny tiny bit of that one!

I did not like the way Steven ended… but I do respect the story they were telling and think they told it well.

I’m still sad about it. Steven is still one of my most beloved, it will always be beautiful and great to me, but that experience did and does sully my memories. There is so, so, so, SO much more good than bad from being in that fandom, and I cherish it. And I hope, if you’re having this experience with OFMD right now, that you’ll find similar comfort.

But, like I said at the top, “it’s okay to not like something but that’s not the same thing as it being bad” has been belabored already by people better at writing about it than me. I just had the incredible privilege to remember my brush with lower case T trauma and having that experience in my last REALLY big deal fandom. That’s why I had been so extra anxious about being disappointed. Because it happened to me before. It helped so much to connect those two.

So the finale happens, and it’s actually about twelve hours of me going from “eh, rushed but fun, whole season was great” to “THIS MAYBE IS THE BEST SHOW OF ALL TIME, ACTUALLY!”

BECAUSE THIS SHOW MADE ME CRY OVER IZZY FUCKING HANDS!!!!

They literally told me this was the story they were telling this season. “Men can change” “The end  of piracy” “Ed leaving Blackbeard behind (ish).”

As for me? I didn’t get an apology for the fish. Instead, I got “Sorry I was a dick.” “You weren’t a dick. Life’s a dick.”

Just… fuckity BAM. THREE FUCKING SENTENCES resolving that fight. Saying so much in so little.

In real life, should these two men have an actual conversation about this shit? Sure!!! But that’s not how OFMD tells its stories!

It works in symbolism. It works in vibes. It works in an hour’s worth of content into each half-hour episode, and for how much lamenting I have done about the pacing, I would prefer that 100x to having to stretch it out too much.

I have said since March 24, 2022 that OFMD wields anachronism as a weapon. First and foremost, it’s fucking funny, but in addition to that, it’s stating clearly: “This is a fantasy world. This is not real history. This show is about romance (and so much more than that), and the rest is just VIBES!!!”

Sometimes vibes can be historical accuracy. Sometimes vibes can be true emotional poignancy. Sometimes vibes can be Ed finding his sunken leathers in the sea, changing underwater somehow, and coming out of the ocean like the Birth of Fucking Venus, because water and rebirth and mermaids and shit is all very prominent this season. And ALSO, and this is very important! BECAUSE IT LOOKS FUCKING COOL!

I don’t want to do much real Izzy meta here. It’s been said by others, and better than me. But it was telegraphed and it was symbolic – he was the paragon of Traditional Piracy in season 1, for goodness’ sake, and Traditional Piracy is Toxic Masculinity, and he was a part of Blackbeard and Ed had to leave Blackbeard behind (yknow, ish), and he got this ABSOLUTLEY FUCKING LOVELY! storyline about appreciating what a (queer) community can do, and god fucking shit fucking dammit… most of all, best of all (for me), was Buttons landing on Izzy’s grave at the end. Men can change. And Izzy DID!!! He did it for Ed. For love. For community. I am puzzled by “it’s fucked up to use Izzy to further Ed’s storyline” because… this was Ed’s season, in the way that season 1 was Stede’s. And Ed cannot be removed from piracy as a whole (neither can Stede!) so to have this old, set in his ways, coded-queerphobic character blossom to the point he can give this gift to Ed and to piracy… idk man. I just find it so fucking beautiful.

It is okay not to like what they did. It’s okay!!! It’s okay, and it’s okay to mourn, and while it’s not okay to do [insert vile behavior here], it’s okay to carefully examine what you think is “bad writing” vs “what you would have preferred to happen” and give good-faith, textually-based criticism on that.

But I want to remind you over and over and over again, this show works on vibes. It tells its stories leaving many, many, many gaps. There are many things I would have liked to see, and y’know what? I would have told the Izzy story differently. I would have personally done it differently. But it’s not my show! It’s not my show, and I am humbled and delighted to remember that, and to appreciate Our Flag Means Death for what it is and not what it isn’t.

Other words have been written better than I could about the 18 months between seasons 1 and 2 and what that does to us as rabid fans with expectations of how things will go. Millions and millions and millions of words have been written about OFMD, fictional and non, and that is going to color our expectations and experience. We had built it up SO MUCH in our minds and along the way I think some of us forgot (INCLUDING ME!!!) that it is first and foremost about Vibes.

The vibes of Izzy’s death are about rebirth and forgiveness and leaving traditional piracy behind. And he got to die in Ed’s arms, knowing (HAPPILY!) that he had been wrong, and giving Ed the gift of letting him know he is loved, and being a part of something. We had a funeral but we also had a wedding. The only constant is change. Men, piracy, Blackbeard; it all changes. And Izzy found peace in that.

Before my last point, I want to @ myself on things I felt versus realizing in the end it is (I will say it until I’m blue in the face) about vibes.

· I was convinced they left Buttons’ transformation ambiguous because they wanted to leave room for it not having been real. NO!!! It is real, until they decided it isn’t. Magic in the OFMD universe? Fucking why not!!! IT’S SYMBOLIC!!! IT’S IMPORTANT TO ED’S STORYLINE AND THE CENTRAL THESES OF THE SHOW!

· I was unhappy, and still am a little, about the Polycule Situation, but now that I realize Oluwande is Zheng’s Stede… I am less so. The Zheng : Auntie :: Ed : Izzy vibes, btw? Fuckin immaculate.

·        Obviously they touched on Stede/Ed’s “killing people trauma” but I’d reallyyyy like Stede to address it, and even though I think Ed’s is left on a very satisfying note, I’d like him to dip a bit more into it as well. But if they don’t, oh well! It’s not like they ignored it, they just didn’t have a Deep Dive like I Wanted Them To!

· They didn’t deal with Ed throwing Stede’s shit away. They just ignored it! Stede started to collect new trinkets, and I believe that was as much about giving the audience back the old feeling of the Revenge as it was anything important (not to say it wasn’t also important thematically!!!). Just like Ed going back to his leathers is both Extremely Important thematically and about putting Taika back in the leathers because that’s what Blackbeard should be wearing for the epic final scenes for the sake of visually keeping the show consistent. That’s Blackbeard’s uniform.

· Stede’s frilly little outfits my beloved. God I hope they give him back some of his frippery in season 3. I think they will re: cursed suit BUT his journey this season was about something else, so!

· Ed’s stupid little non-profit non-apology, oh my god. It was so funny. And there is a transition from eps 5 to 6 where Ed is back in his leathers and the crew is more comfortable around him. They didn’t have to have him do a Real Apology, it’s implied it was all settled. What was the timeline? A day? DOESN’T MATTER, BABY, VIBES!!!

· Lots more, I’m sure, but now that I’ve tried to let it all go, I’m remembering less of what I wanted and appreciating what I got!

And, last point here, I think it is also very very very important to remember that a lot of people are normal about this show. In fact, WAY more people are normal about this show than aren’t. And that is EXTREMELY! IMPORTANT!!! because otherwise it wouldn’t be profitable and we all know what would happen then. We are the core of it, to be sure. Without word of mouth that stems from our intensity, this show would not be NEARLY as successful as it is. I truly, truly believe that.

But.

Do normies need deeply emotional discussions dissecting the central relationships? No. What normies need is Ed and Stede running dramatically toward each other on the beach and kissing. And I am happy, so fucking happy, to realize that’s what I need too. I’ve got fanworks for the rest.

I love this fucking show and this fucking fandom and its fucking creators so much. Fuck.

[katnissmellarkkk]

Hmmm I’m bored and I’m a sucker for parallels and first and lasts so I did a collection of first and last moments for every major relationship Katniss had throughout the series. 🤍🤍🤍

-

Peeta

The mayor finishes the dreary Treaty of Treason and motions for Peeta and me to shake hands. His are as solid and warm as those loaves of bread. Peeta looks me right in the eye and gives my hand what I think is meant to be a reassuring squeeze. Maybe it’s just a nervous spasm.

We turn back to face the crowd as the anthem of Panem plays.

Oh, well, I think. There will be twenty-four of us. Odds are someone else will kill him before I do.

/

Peeta and I grow back together. There are still moments when he clutches the back of a chair and hangs on until the flashbacks are over. I wake screaming from nightmares of mutts and lost children. But his arms are there to comfort me. And eventually his lips. On the night I feel that thing again, the hunger that overtook me on the beach, I know this would have happened anyway. That what I need to survive is not Gale’s fire, kindled with rage and hatred. I have plenty of fire myself. What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again. And only Peeta can give me that.

So after, when he whispers, “You love me. Real or not real?”

I tell him, “Real.”

-

Haymitch

Now I am truly in danger of crying, but fortunately Haymitch chooses this time to come staggering across the stage to congratulate me. “Look at her. Look at this one!” he hollers, throwing an arm around my shoulders. He’s surprisingly strong for such a wreck. “I like her!” His breath reeks of liquor and it’s been a long time since he’s bathed. “Lots of . . . ” He can’t think of the word for a while. “Spunk!” he says triumphantly. “More than you!” he releases me and starts for the front of the stage. “More than you!” he shouts, pointing directly into a camera.

Is he addressing the audience or is he so drunk he might actually be taunting the Capitol? I’ll never know because just as he’s opening his mouth to continue, Haymitch plummets off the stage and knocks himself unconscious.

He’s disgusting, but I’m grateful. With every camera gleefully trained on him, I have just enough time to release the small, choked sound in my throat and compose myself.

/

Like a good mentor, Haymitch makes me eat a sandwich and then pretends he believes I’m asleep for the rest of the trip. He busies himself going through every compartment on the hovercraft, finding the liquor, and stowing it in his bag. It’s night when we land on the green of the Victor’s Village. Half of the houses have lights in the windows, including Haymitch’s and mine. Not Peeta’s. Someone has built a fire in my kitchen. I sit in the rocker before it, clutching my mother’s letter.

“Well, see you tomorrow,” says Haymitch.

As the clinking of his bag of liquor bottles fades away, I whisper, “I doubt it.”

-

Gale

In the woods waits the only person with whom I can be myself. Gale. I can feel the muscles in my face relaxing, my pace quickening as I climb the hills to our place, a rock ledge overlooking a valley. A thicket of berry “bushes protects it from unwanted eyes. The sight of him waiting there brings on a smile. Gale says I never smile except in the woods.

“Hey, Catnip,” says Gale. My real name is Katniss, but when I first told him, I had barely whispered it. So he thought I’d said Catnip.

/

We stand there, face-to-face, not meeting each other’s eyes. “You didn’t come see me in the hospital.” He doesn’t answer, so finally I just say it. “Was it your bomb?”

“I don’t know. Neither does Beetee,” he says. “Does it matter? You’ll always be thinking about it.”

He waits for me to deny it; I want to deny it, but it’s true. Even now I can see the flash that ignites her, feel the heat of the flames. And I will never be able to separate that moment from Gale. My silence is my answer.

“That was the one thing I had going for me. Taking care of your family,” he says. “Shoot straight, okay?” He touches my cheek and leaves.

-

Finnick

The crunching hits my ear before I even know he’s beside me, and when I turn my head, Finnick Odair’s famous sea green eyes “are only inches from mine. He pops a sugar cube in his mouth and leans against my horse.

“Hello, Katniss,” he says, as if we’ve known each other for years, when in fact we’ve never met.

“Hello, Finnick,” I say, just as casually, although I’m feeling uncomfortable at his closeness, especially since he’s got so much bare skin exposed.

“Want a sugar cube?” he says, offering his hand, which is piled high. “They’re supposed to be for the horses, but who cares? They’ve got years to eat sugar, whereas you and I . . . well, if we see something sweet, we better grab it quick.”

/

Far below, I can just make out Finnick, struggling to hang on as three mutts tear at him. As one yanks back his head to take the death bite, something bizarre happens. It’s as if I’m Finnick, watching images of my life flash by. The mast of a boat, a silver parachute, Mags laughing, a pink sky, Beetee’s trident, Annie in her wedding dress, waves breaking over rocks. Then it’s over.

-

Johanna

Johanna Mason. […] She ruffles up her spiky hair and rolls her wide-set brown eyes. “Isn’t my costume awful? My stylist’s the biggest idiot in the Capitol. Our tributes have been trees for forty years under her. Wish I’d gotten Cinna. You look fantastic.”

Girl talk. That thing I’ve always been so bad at. Opinions on clothes, hair, makeup. So I lie. “Yeah, he’s been helping me design my own clothing line. You should see what he can do with velvet.” Velvet. The only fabric I could think of off the top of my head.

“I have. On your tour. That strapless number you wore in District Two? The deep blue one with the diamonds? So gorgeous I wanted to reach through the screen and tear it right off your back,” says Johanna.

I bet you did, I think. With a few inches of my flesh.

/

“I made it for you. Something to put in your drawer.” I place it in her hands. “Smell it.”

She lifts the bundle to her nose and takes a tentative sniff. “Smells like home.” Tears flood her eyes.

“That’s what I was hoping. You being from Seven and all,” I say. “Remember when we met? You were a tree. Well, briefly.”

Suddenly, she has my wrist in an iron grip. “You have to kill him, Katniss.”

“Don’t worry.” I resist the temptation to wrench my arm free.

“Swear it. On something you care about,” she hisses.

“I swear it. On my life.” But she doesn’t let go of my arm.

“On your family’s life,” she insists.

“On my family’s life,” I repeat. I guess my concern for my own survival isn’t compelling enough. She lets go and I rub my wrist. “Why do you think I’m going, anyway, brainless?”

That makes her smile a little. “I just needed to hear it.” She presses the bundle of pine needles to her nose and closes her eyes.

-

Prim

“You look beautiful,” says Prim in a hushed voice.

“And nothing like myself,” I say. I hug her, because I know these next few hours will be terrible for her. Her first reaping. She’s about as safe as you can get, since she’s only entered once. I wouldn’t let her take out any tesserae. But she’s worried about me. That the unthinkable might happen.

I protect Prim in every way I can, but I’m powerless against the reaping. The anguish I always feel when she’s in pain wells up in my chest and threatens to register on my face. I notice her blouse has pulled out of her skirt in the back again and force myself to stay calm. “Tuck your tail in, little duck,” I say, smoothing the blouse back in place.

Prim giggles and gives me a small “Quack.”

“Quack yourself,” I say with a light laugh. The kind only Prim can draw out of me.

/

First I get a glimpse of the blond braid down her back. Then, as she yanks off her coat to cover a wailing child, I notice the duck tail formed by her untucked shirt. I have the same reaction I did the day Effie Trinket called her name at the reaping. At least, I must go limp, because I find myself at the base of the flagpole, unable to account for the last few seconds. Then I am pushing through the crowd, just as I did before. Trying to shout her name above the roar. I’m almost there, almost to the barricade, when I think she hears me. Because for just a moment, she catches sight of me, her lips form my name.

And that’s when the rest of the parachutes go off.

/

The small white bird tinged in pink dives down, buries her claws in my chest, and tries to keep me afloat. “No, Katniss! No! You can’t go!”

But the ones I hated are winning, and if she clings to me, she’ll be lost as well. “Prim, let go!” And finally she does.

-

[cupidsrrott]

Hi i would like to request a neymar x reader where the reader and neymar like the reporter of psg and one day one of the player in the other team say something perv about the reader and neymar get angry and get into a fight with him .And i just wanted to say that i really liked your story with joão .

𝙘𝙖𝙢𝙚����𝙖; NEYMAR JR.

𝙄𝙉 𝙒𝙃𝙄𝘾𝙃, they’re in a relationship that hasn’t been shared with anyone yet until a certain comment has been made by a player on the opposing team.

author’s note; i hope you don’t mind if i changed a detail or so. but i hope this is what you were somewhat hoping for! and thank you so much that means a lot!! (p.s this is not proofread and neither was jungle, so there will be some errors so sorry!)

“Yes, they looked great Gio” I told my cameraman through my phone referring to the clips he sent of the team and some of me last night as I was sat in the car on the way to the stadium. “Okay that’s great so you’re all good for me to send them over?” “Yes, 100 percent I’m all for it, thank you” I told me with a smile.

“Yeah no problem! I gotchu love” he laughed a little through the phone. “I’ll see you in a bit before the match yeah?” “Of course I’ll see you there and I have some notes that I want us to go over.” I told him pointedly as he let out a grumble of a few words.

“Alright, alright see you” “see you” I replied hanging up the phone. I searched through the bag quite violently for my notebook and pen hoping I placed it in my bag last night. “You alright meu amor?” Asked Neymar who was driving the both of us to the stadium.

I didn’t answer for a moment until I found what I was looking for. I let out a breath “uh yeah, yes, yes everything is okay” my ragged breathing became steady after a moment. “Always so worried” he said with a shake of his head a small smile toying on his lips.

“I have every reason to be, also remember-” “remember to use the back exit because no one should see us together” he interrupted saying my little bit that I tell him quite often. “Alright, alright anyways how do you feel about the match?” I asked him putting a fake microphone to him.

“Good” he shrugged simply, I was always the anxious wreck with a conscious. While he went head first into everything no second thought. “Well that’s good I suppose, not nervous at all?” “Not one bit” “Okay, okay” I chuckled a little. As he grabbed my hand in his placing a sloppy kiss on it.

I immediately retracted “you are so gross!” I laughed amusingly as I wipe my hand while he giggled to himself about his antics. I then pull his hand into my lap keeping both hands clasped against his one. We then just watched as buildings and structures zoomed past us as we finally made our way to the stadium.

Neymar drove towards the secluded back exit and we made our scheduled walk down separating from each other him to his team and me to mine. But he didn’t leave me without a kiss to my temple and a whisper of endearment. I found my usual way to Gio and some team co-reporters.

We were on the pitch and I talked about said notes earlier to Gio and the others. And we finally began to commence with the production. Gio held a thumbs up as I began to introduce and speak to those watching.

While doing so I could feel eyes on me but the stadium was only starting to fill up and my co-workers were busy amongst themselves. While speaking to the camera as I didn’t leave my eyes off of it. I found in the corner of my eye a player on the opposing team parallel to me and his raked over me.

I held my composure until my very last word, the player finally leaving. I gulped as Gio finally held his thumb up signalling I was good to end there. I looked to where the player once was shuddering a little and went through the scripture that I was supposed to base today’s production off of.

I interviewed a few players whilst on the pitch and planned to do so after the anthem during warm ups for a minute update on how they felt pre match. These were my favourite of days I enjoyed game days even if I was all over the place and my nerves were everywhere. But they typically did bring me joy especially post match (if we won of course).

We finally ended warm up interviews and I said my lines before I transitioned into the focus of another reporter. Sighing I fixed my mini skirt as I watched both teams warm up on either side of the field. I tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear as I focused on Neymar.

Whom was running with ball and passed it to a team mate who then continued with drill and Neymar ended the warm up drill by shooting in the net. Smiling afterwards revealing all his teeth and I couldn’t help but smile at him.

Neymar catching me through eye contact gave me a small wink unbeknownst to anyone catching it, as I shook my head in amusement. Neymar continued with the warm ups alongside his teammates and I took a glance over to the other side.

Seeing the same player with the number 12 on his jersey look me up in down with a smirk at the end. I turned away from him and tucked myself away into the building to prepare for the match notes I need to take on my laptop. But not without a little smile to say good luck to Neymar whom a immediately caught it and nodded his head with a grin response.

I sat behind glass windows reporters from sports channels and the other teams reporters sat along there as well. As we saw a clear view of the field and everyone in the stands. Soon after my fellow reporters for PSG found me and took their seats.

“I hope they win this one” “I have my fingers crossed” said my co-workers as I looked up from my laptop with a tight lipped smile. As I just waited for the match to commence.

—

NEYMAR

My breath was ragged as I continued my chase with the ball towards the net but I didn’t let anything stop me. Dodging some players and a rainbow later I shot my shot to the net and successfully made it in. Running with excitement I celebrated with my teammates.

Patting my back as everything died down slightly we went to our respective positions. And the game went back into play. As we were playing number 12 on the other team was on my back up until half time, even after the many times I shrugged him off he wouldn’t get off of me.

But I myself let it go knowing this was the sport. Once half time had ended the score read 2-3 in our favour. I just needed to see Y/n’s face before we started again just a look but I knew I couldn’t. I knew she could see me through the reporters area but I just needed to see her for myself.

As I had the neon vest on to signify that I wasn’t on yet, I looked to my side seeing 12 hoping slightly to warm up and then turn his neck to result in cracking it. I looked away and put my focus on the match in front of me waiting to be put on again.

And finally I was eventually put on the field number 12 also made his way up onto the field. As we stood quite close to each other in order to defend the ball. We waited for the referee to call and a mere minute before he blew his whistle.

“Hey you know that fine ass reporter you got. Y/n right? She got an ass I’d hit” he said smugly into my ear the whistle was then heard but I couldn’t careless and neither could he. “The fuck you just say?” I said as I turned my jaw clenching so tightly I felt like I was seeing red and I got closer to him getting to somewhat eye level.

He was most definitely taller but he made himself much taller by puffing his chest out. “What? You can have her first man. I’ll take her next” he shrugged like what he was saying had no value. I shoved him hard as he stumbled a little backwards. He balanced himself out and shoved me right back.

That was when I threw a punch to his jaw causing him to fall backwards. Ready to throw some more punches and I was even ready to step on this asshole’s face with my cleat. But before doing so I was pulled away by Hugo, a fellow forward on my team.

The ref made his way over raising up a red card, I sighed loudly through my noise. There was a slight crowd of both teams forming us but everyone was definitely in earshot. “Tell Y/n once she’s bored of you to call me up, I’ll give her what she needs in every way.”

He said from the ground as he fixed his jaw a little, I loosened myself from Hugo’s grip about to throw another punch at him but was caught again by the ref this time as he pushed me back. “Fuck you!” I shout at him as he stood up pushing past my team and his as all I could really see was red.

My jaw was clenched as I pushed the referees arm off of my chest and made it back to the sidelines on my team’s side who looked at me in shock at the information that was just shared about Y/n and I. I kept my jaw clenched as I was being filmed and knowing full well the news about Y/n and I was being shared at this very moment.

—

I gulped still in shock at what happened on the pitch today it was now almost 9 o’clock the sun was completely set and was now pitch black. I unlocked the door to my apartment Neymar following behind me still silent just like car ride back. Locking the door behind me I then placed my bag on the kitchen island.

While Neymar went into the bathroom slamming the door shut as the shower was heard a moment after. I was still left in the dark about what was said on the pitch. The news of Neymar and I had been leaked during the red card. But why Neymar threw a punch couldn’t have been because of this reason.

I sighed before running a hand across my face, I went into my bedroom changing into much comfier clothes. As I walked out from my walk in closet I was face with Neymar in solely just sweats which I assumed he pulled out from my dresser before going to the bathroom.

He took a spot on his side of the bed, I tilted my head to the side looking at him with sympathetic eyes. As he refused to meet my eyes I walked over to him placing my hands steadily on his shoulders. Refusing to look up at me I started to speak, “do you wanna tell me what happened?”

“It isn’t important” he shrugged I wrapped my arms around his neck as I stood in between his legs. “Yes it is, you broke that guys jaw” I swallowed still in disbelief. As he only looked the wall in front of him trying his very best to mask his emotions, if I hadn’t known him I wouldn’t of said anything. But I knew better.

“Neymar” I said softly stroking his cheek with my thumb as my hand cupped his cheek and then moved his face so I could see his eyes. “Why?” I asked simply continuing to hold his face in now both of my hands. “He was saying shit about you” he admitted after moment of silence.

“So I wasn’t gonna sit there and take it you know I mean he was disrespecting you in every goddamn way possible.” He spat now holding onto my waist, “you know you’re my girl, I’m not gonna let anyone say shit about you. Even if it causes broken bones, meh amor. I’m always gonna be by your side.”

Placing a kiss to the top of his head he spoke lowly “you’re not mad?” “No I’m not mad” I told him speaking into his freshly showered hair. He pulled me into him securing the grip around me as his hand rested on the small of my and held his head to my stomach as I kept my head on top of his kissing it once more. The both of us remaining in this position for a few minutes of silence.

I pulled back a little to straddle his waist and kept my arms wrapped around his neck and his hands remained firmly on the small of my back. I tucked my head into the crook of his neck giving it a small kiss as well. “Thank you” I whispered “What?” He replied quite shocked.

“Just thank you he obviously didn’t say anything good about me to have you break his jaw. So thank you for doing that for me” I said softly playing with the hair at the back of his head. “You don’t have to thank me meu amor I’ll always be there for you” his accent thick as he said this. As I then smiled into the crook of his neck.

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Monday wonderful fandom :) I can’t believe we’ve reached the finale I’m in shock we're here. This has been my side hobby for 9 plus months. I started these to get through the extended hiatus. I wasn’t even sure anyone would even read them. The response I got was so lovely. I adore this fandom. So welcoming to any new Chenford content.

So thank you to everyone who’s read these especially those who've been with me since the very beginning. I can’t explain how much it has meant to me. Whether it was likes, reblogs or comments. Special shout out to my tumblr bestie @makeitastrength and @northern-neighbor You both commented on every single one of these. Thank you so much for your insight and sticking with me this entire time. Means more than you'll ever know.

I’m planning to do mini reviews during this new season. Then this same kind of thing during our hiatus hopefully we’ll have S7 locked in by then. *fingers crossed* I finished this before S6 which was my goal. We are only 8 days away which is unreal. Eeeee. Let us get started.

5x22 Under Siege

This episode starts off with all kinds of anxiety. Aaron and Celina kill me with not calling the noise in WHY.... Why didn’t you call it in? Ugh. Celina lying on top of Aaron protecting him till they arrive. Rip my damn heart out right off the bat why don't ya? I’m going to cry. I love Tim and Lucy showing up to the scene together. They’re clearly off shift and showing up to the scene with each other. I love these little details they make my heart so happy.

They’re a packaged deal now and I couldn’t be happier about it. Also like to note looks like Lucy is wearing one of his jackets. Maybe they were at his place when they got the call? The sleeves look long on her and I adore it. Basically living together at this point. I can’t get over it. Just casually showing up to scenes now. Ain’t no thang. This thought is where I live till S6 LOL

Anyways Tim says he heard it was Aaron. Grey confirms this is true. GSW to the back. Looks like the same spot Jackson was shot. Eerily so. Three masked men and they were ambushed. The painful parallels to Jackson’s death in this one getting me in the feels. Grey has them start to work the scene. Lucy looks incredibly upset but is trying to keep it in check. Probably feeling the Jackson vibes too.

Our couple arrives at the hospital with an update. Once again arriving together. I love the quick looks we get as they approach. That silent communication of their's ever present. Also she is wearing the necklace I must comment. It’s popping against that shirt she is wearing. Like to also point out how look at each other while the other speaks. It’s the little things I love so very much. Getting massive 4x01 vibes from this scene too. Reminding me of the scene is Wes's living room night after the hug. The height difference, the way Lucy is looking at Tim as he speaks. United front power couple vibes.

So much can change and things like this stay the same I love it. They’re reporting back their CI’s have nothing. No one has heard back about a gang targeting cops. Lucy has also hit a dead end with the masks. Their next idea was Elijah but Tim says nothing out of prison confirming that. Angela and Wes are working on the riddle. Grey tells them to head home they’re not getting anywhere tonight. Once they've all left Grey turning to Luna saying he can lose another. Ugh getting me in the feels so early in this episode. More Jackson feels.

Lucy and Tim get home late. The minute they’re back Lucy’s walls are down. Tim can see how upset she is. Another great callback to 4x01. To that hug. Only this time Lucy doesn’t have to ask for it. Tim seeks her out. See’s how now that they're home her work walls are down. She is visibly wrecked and can't hold back the tears any longer. I love how he pulls her right into his arms. Being the exact comfort she needs in this moment. He can't stand to see her upset. Wanting to make it better.

Tim grabbing her instantly is so lovely. Lucy crashes into him and falls apart. He gets to comfort as much as she needs now. How very far we’ve come. It’s been a beautiful journey to this point. Lucy is ready to fall apart in her safe place. Knowing Tim will be there pick up the pieces. Shield her from the PTSD this must be bringing up for her. I love how he encases her fully. One hand around her back the other gently cradling her head to his chest.

Tim closing his eyes wanting to absorb her sadness. The swaying and his chin on top of her head. *squee* I love her being fully enclosed in his arms. Also never be over the fact Eric improvised the kiss to her head. Forever squeeing about that fact. Our ship King is the best. Oh captain my captain. How damn intimate and sweet it is as he does as such. Then resting his head back on hers. Telling her ‘It’s ok.’ His hand in her hair rubbing her back soothingly. I cannot. Lucy was alone last time. Grieved alone and dealt with everything solo.

Now she never has to be alone again and I wanna cry at that thought. Getting emotional at how beautiful this hug is. Lovely ray of sunshine in a rather dark finale. I love this scene so much it made my chest hurt. You want to see outstanding chemistry in a short amount of time? Watch this scene. Melissa and Eric are glorious together. We truly are so lucky to have them as our ship. This is such a soft and gentle moment.

Tim pulling her in and wanting to comfort her has me all in my feels. Lucy has this wonderful man to catch her when she falls now. To be able to absolutely come apart in his arms. Knowing he’ll be there to comfort and keep her together when she does. Gah I love them so much. Also A + to whoever does the music. The song in this moment is adding to the emotional depth of the scene. Amazingly good. It’s been so on point in this season. They need a raise whoever does this.

They finally have some suspects to track down. Violent felons that have connection to the station and to them as a group. Lucy offers to check on one by herself. Grey says no and Tim offers to go with her. Because he loves her and wants to keep her in his sights. They’ve all been attacked at this point. Except for him and Lucy. No way he’s letting her go solo. It’s not cause he didn’t trust her to handle herself. He can’t handle her going alone. His instincts on high alert.

Lucy telling Tim he should be out knocking down doors with Metro. Tim tells her 'He’s good'. As good as he can be without letting her out of his sights during this. Only they could so effortlessly flirt while on duty. In the middle of an intense OP. Lucy letting him know she doesn’t need him to protect her. Tim is very aware of this. Says he knows. Lucy turning this moment into some very cute light banter. Saying he is telling her he needs the protecting. Tim being sassy right back with his reply above. God I love them.

Their teasing and banter is iconic. Lucy’s next line is fantastic. I know we haven’t had an official ILY you yet. But they’ve said it so many different ways this season. In moments such as this. When we do officially get it not gonna be a shock to either of them. Tim telling her 'Back at you.' Making me all emotional. They are such a power couple and the next portion of this episode proves that. I’ve always said watching them in the field is poetry in motion. This next battle scene is literal proof of such.

It’s a good thing Tim came with her. I don’t want to think what would’ve happened if she’d been alone. The creepy crowd coming at them. My stomach dropped. First Tim willing to sacrifice himself for her so she could get away. *heart clutch* Man would die for her and not even blink in the decision making process. Lucy of course will not allow this whatsoever. Valiant or not he’s not falling on his sword for her.

We get a nice call back to 1x18. Not only with Lucy saying they need to go to higher ground. Like he taught her in that ep but to show no mercy. Tim instructing they hurt as many as they can and then retreat upstairs. Lucy getting exactly what he’s saying because they’re simpatico. This entire scene shows that. Also LOVE Lucy saying they only stand a chance TOGETHER. Theme of this season right here. They're better together. Damn right.

What a bad ass battle couple we have. Look at this scene. Lucy calling the audibles in this moment and Tim following her play. Repeating it back and saying 'Copy that.' Gah I love this so very much. Tim trusts her gut without question. Not a doubt in his mind to go with it. The amount of respect he has for her in the field is immense. He was going to stay behind she said no. Then Tim instantly followed her lead after that.

Damnit I love them so much. Tim’s instinct is to always protect Lucy. Where her's is to protect them both in this moment. It’s never because he thinks she can’t handle it. Tim just can’t handle the idea of losing her if he doesn’t. Started from the bottom now we're here and I’m emotional. Also the song once again killer during this epic scene.

Love her touching his arm before they engage in battle in that first one. Look at them in the final two above. I know Eric said they had a blast filming this. They are so damn in-sync. It's such an amazing thing to watch them take these people on. Like I've sad many times before poetry in motion when they're in the field. I love getting to watch the well oiled machine that is them. This was that on steroids ha

Eric was so excited for us to watch this scene and I can see why. It so fun to watch. Taking these guys apart together one at a time. I LOVE Lucy taking that guy out and then grabbing his riot shield. Tim is starting to get overwhelmed and she makes work of what's around her. Running towards Tim getting that guy off her man. With a very impressive shove might I add. Sends him flying down the stairs with the others. They have to start retreating up the stairs after this. They are slowly running out of ammo as well. Backup has yet to arrive and they're battling the best they can to stay alive till it does.

Harper and Nolan finally arrive on scene. Nyla tells John to get to them. She is going to get her sniper rifle even the odds a bit. Unfortunately even with higher ground they’re getting ambushed from all sides now. It's now all melee combat at this point without ammo. Tim takes a guy out with pepper spray and gets a guy off his girl.

Who is literally choking the life out of her. Tim dispatches this guy with any remaining rage he has left. Smashing this guy's face into the wall. Making sure he can't get up to get back to her. All the while Harper being a bad ass snipping people left and right for Tim. This scene is epic af. I love it so much. One of my all time field scenes for sure. They did a damn good job with this holy cow.

Then we get an other beautiful parallel from 1x01 to now. When Lucy pulled Tim to safety mid battle. We get to see Tim do the same for her. The way Tim scoops Lucy up and carries her to safety. I’m not crying you are.... Power couple since day one they just didn’t know it yet. The way he picks her up and then shields her with his body. Gah it’s so good.

When the door opens Tim is worried it’s another bad guy. He shields Lucy with his body. Ready to take a hit to keep her protected. Not willing to let them get at her again. I’m sobbing everyone. The instinct to always protect one another. I’m drowning in feels over here in the best way. Nolan ushers them to safety. Never been happier to see John Nolan in my life LOL

They make it to the stairway battered and bruised. Gasping for air as they try to recover from what just happened. Let’s look at the no space between them when they land on the stairs. Tim reaching out for her instantly. Placing his hand on her thigh checking on her. TWICE might I add. He touches her twice there. While checking around to make sure they’re truly safe. Lucy reaches out for his hand on the first touch. Also their heads touching as well in that first gif. Gah this mini moment has so much to it.

Tim is grounding himself in this moment through those touches. Making sure Lucy is breathing and he can stand down to catch his own breath. Such an intimate moment after an incredibly intense battle. He almost lost her so he is reaching out and making sure she’s ok. He also needs to touch her to settle himself. It was to tell her we’re ok now’s and to confirm to himself she was as well. Damnit it's so good. Don't tell me one of Tim’s biggest love languages isn’t physical touch. It for sure is.

Our last shot of the season for them. Just a BAMF couple post battle. Height difference that I love so much. The check in’s they do walking away knowing this could've been so much worse. Battle worn and bruised. These shots always hit harder knowing they’re together. I would like to think they would fuss over each other's wounds at the hospital. Or at home. We shall see what S6 brings for that if anything regarding it. If not sure someone will write a fic. LOL

The lack of personal space as they walk from the scene always floors me. As close they can possibly be at the moment. Sure Tim is thanking his lucky stars he came with her. I don’t wanna imagine what would’ve happened had he not. Or what Tim would’ve done had something happened. They looks so exhausted they’ve earned a good snuggle and some alone time. Sadly they're still in the middle of case so that's a no go.

Look at our power couple everyone. They're ours. We get to have them. And have a season to look forward to. I was so nervous about the season ending. Knowing this strike could last a long time and it did. Luckily we are coming out of it. Light is at the end of the tunnel. Looking forward to S6 and all the squeeing to come with it.

~~~~

Side notes non-Chenford

This episode one giant stress. One of them being when they try and take Harper’s daughter. The panic in my soul for her. My goodness this finale was great.

All of Celina's scene with Aaron pulling at my feels as well.

Thank you everyone once again who supported these reviews. They started out as a way to fill time between S5 and S6. Became a truly fun hobby for me. Kinda sad the ride is over but like I said at the beginning I’ll do mini reviews each week for s6 won’t be rid of that easily ❤️❤️ Can’t wait to delve in S6 with you all :)

[plainemmanem]

sighhhhhhhh. thinking abt prone boning w steve heheheh (when the girl is flat on her stomach and the guy fucks her from behind)

he’d be so sweet and caring after he absolutely wrecked u in missionary. he’d flip u over and you’re too fucked out to do anything, so after giving ur sides a squeeze, “here honey, lift your hips,” then he’d slip a pillow under ur lower stomach and before spitting down ur already wet slit and fucking u while his thighs (😩) straddle ur butt cheeks. “god honey it’s such a tight squeeze,” in between pants and he folds over to move ur hair from ur neck to nibble on the back of ur earlobe, or to massage your shoulders as ur whining into his pillow. when he finally cums he’s clutching u, forearm parallel to your clavicle and ramble moaning into ur ear about how damn bad he loves u

(steve is a honey boyfriend and i stand by that)

sorry. just thinking. u can’t blame a woman for her thoughts.

i love women and their thoughts wow.

he’s such a “baby” and “pretty girl” and “honey” guy when he fucks you like that. just something about him pressing you into the mattress, you can’t feel anything but his weight on top of you. his scent, his feel, his sounds completely consuming you oh god.

he’s already made you dizzily cum once in missionary (with him sucking at your neck and squeezing your hand and whispering i love you’s against your skin) and at this point you’re like putty beneath him. and he just loves when you get all pliant and needy like this, doing whatever he wants:) and you just finished cumming and now he’s wrapping his arms around you and whispering a gentle little “lemme help you, honey” as he flips you onto your tummy<3 and you knew this was coming because his favorite position when you’re all soft like this is him laying on top of you, suffocating you:) and he grabs a pillow from the top of the bed and grabs your hip bone and tugs you up just a little to slip the cushion under your tummy<3 and then he’s rubbing his huge, warm hands up your thighs, kissing up your spine, looking at how pretty you look just laying there, mess between your legs, waiting for him:) and then he leans over top of you, wrapping his arm around your front, across your clavicle, pulling you into him (he can always hear your little noises so much better at this angle) and then he’s leading his cock into your pussy, groaning right in your ear how messy and tight you are from this angle, how you’re gripping onto him, don’t want him to leave<3 and then he’s laying all his weight down on top of you, kissing at the back of your neck and sucking at any part of your throat he can reach, slithering a hand underneath you to palm at your breasts:) and the whole time his voice is so low and husky, asking of you can feel how deep he’s getting, asking if you’ll be his pretty girl and cum for him again<3 and then he’s running his hand down your front until he can find your little clit, his hand pressed between you and the mattress as his cock stretches you so som much:) and when he finally finds that little bud, your hips start bucking into the mattress, looking for more friction, and you start to whimper and moan, and all he does is coo at you all demeaning: “oh ho ho, sweetheart, did i find it?” and then he’s pressing his cock a deep into you as it’ll go, sucking at your earlobe and pressing to hard into your clit, you can’t even think straight at this point</3 and then he’s whispering a little “oh honey, cum for me, cum with me baby, squeeze me— shit, god i’m cumming” and he’s pressing his hips into you and pressing you into the mattress and both of his arms are pulling you into him so tight, he really is clutching onto you as he fills you up so so much with cum<3 he’s babbling for what feels like a full minute, his hips stuttering as he mumbles out “god fuck i love you, i l-love you i love you i love you oh oh . ugh oh god, needed you so bad, love you so bad oh fuck” until he physically cannot cum anymore and then he’s just holding onto you for dear life and pressing you into the mattress<3

[nexusnyx]

🖋️ “can’t you see how wrecked I am for you” + Bucky Barnes (any version of him that you like) 🤍

But also congrats on the 10.5K!! That’s amazing!

It's been a while since I wrote for my tin-man (Joel brain-rot is eating me alive), so thanks for the first Buck request 🤍 And tysm baby, I'm super happy abt it 🤍🤍 — main masterlist | fireplace celebration | 🏷️: pining, strangers to co-workers to pining idiots, avenger!Reader, love confessions, Bucky my darling I missed you; [WC: 1.4k]

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ˗ˏˋ꒰ sink your teeth ꒱

The thing he hated the most was the sight of blood.

No one knew that but you. Not even Steve, before he left.

Bucky grew to hate the sight of blood, which was inconvenient in his life of work, which meant there was yet one more thing he needed to learn how to disassociate from, and that was always a hassle. While his mind was enhanced to handle all the years of things piling up on it, there was only so much a single person could handle.

Thank whatever it was for Wakanda. For Sam.

For you.

Even if you wrecked him. Even if Bucky ended up twisting himself into two just to get trouble of your way, and even if that stole him the little bit of sleep he grew to have.

He just never knew it was mutual.

It stays hidden until the inevitable happens, and a mission strands you both in the face of deadly danger

It’s when he sees blood dripping down your face that Bucky notices how in deep he truly is.

The location is… somewhere in Slovakia. Mission target is unclear, as of two hours ago. You’d been injured, and Bucky’s priorities had sort of—shifted. Despite all training, despite his best judgement, they’d changed, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Bucky took care of the agents. The threats, and also the weird ‘alien’ technology.

After almost a decade now, the word had lost all meaning to him, and none of it even mattered anywhere. Alien, or not, from this Earth or from another parallel fucking unvierse; Bucky had no interest in whatever it was that Belova spoke about in his ear, so Bucky uttered the only information he cared about. “Agent Widow’s in the top perimeter. The interference’s coming from there. I’m going in for her.”

There’s protest to his statement, but Bucky had expected that.

Neither Sam nor Yelena’s voice have any success in stopping him.

Bucky removes his gadgets, knowing that Fury’s instructions, while sometimes unclear and often incomplete, were never wrong.

Some would call it a miracle, or astonishing; the way Bucky manages to ignore the glowing orb in the middle of the room, floating in the middle of a glass container in pure, red energy. He scans the room, looking for the only thing he needs to find.

You’re in the corner of a room.

The only red he could ever care for is the one in your face.

“Hey, Barnes.”

He dashes towards you.

Bucky’s hand shook like this for the last time when he was still being woken up by night terrors, and his hands felt like ghosts of someone else’s. This time, they feel like his, very much. They’re used to touching you, but never this firmly. Bucky cups your face in his hands and starts assessing your body as soon as he kneels down beside you, securing the gun and putting it in his pants.

“You were told to wait.” He sounds like a wreck.

Feels like one too, when he gets a closer look to the blast you must’ve took. The biggest wound is on your temple, and another significant one is in your eyebrow—the reason you’re covered in blood. Why your eyes are bloodshot from the liquid that dripped into it.

The smile that pops on your face is bloody, too. “Who else would’ve stopped him, hm?”

The mention of ‘him’ makes Bucky follow your gaze, finding him, lifeless a few meters away.

It explains why the orb’s still alive, and you’re in this state. “He was Strange’s problem. How much did we miss? How much did he hurt in you? I called the evac downstairs. Sam’s pissed at me, but he must be finding another way in. We’re gonna be out of here in a minute.”

“Dunno if we’ll make it that far.” Her voice sounded distant, and it snapped him back into sharpness.

“Shut up.” Bucky made quick work of ripping a piece of her old flannel jacket to press hard against the wound, no matter how much her wince hurt in him. “You were told to wait, damn it. What the fuck were you thinking?”

It sounded… emotional.

Bucky saw it in your eye—it went unnoticed by his ears, but when Bucky notices your eyes widening and your whole face taking in the surprise of how he’s cracking with this situation, Bucky can feel it.

How much this all affects him.

The new Avenger is a classified, Unprotocoled asset of pure, destined energy. We found her in a classified location. Her life is a classified matter. But from now on, I want you to welcome her as one of your own. 

He was supposed to learn how to work with you, not how to feel all over again.

Once he’s satisfied with the improvised bandage around your arm wounds, Bucky tries getting you to get up, but you whisper to him, so small and so unlike you that it stops his attempts; “wait, wait. Wait, Buck.”

“You gotta get up. It’s getting hotter, and you know it. I’m not looking at it, but I can feel that thing getting wider. Please, sweetheart—”

“It’s a beacon.”

“—you hafto’—what?” Bucky halts. “What are you talking about?”

A smile blooms in your face. “The orb. It’s a beacon, Buck.”

“A beacon? For… who? For what?”

“The right location. The right—universe.” He sees it, then. That faint, green-ish glow in your eyes. “Wanda was hurting and she erased us all from existence, Buck.”

He feels lighter than gravity and, somehow, larger than the ocean.

Somewhere in the wiring of his brain, the Winter Soldier slaps files into his field of vision, and his eyes are obscured by images that were once burned into him—experiments, incosintensies, fragments and forgotten pieces; a tale of an entire group of people, and something about how all of that connected to the instability in this… “realm”.

Scientists had no other word for it, back then. Russian was a poetic language.

Bucky swallows the cotton in his mouth and looks at you, shining in red light, and emitting something of your own inane power. Something old, and earthly.

Bucky wants to be buried in the green of your eyes, suddenly emerging in your iris.

“I can’t do this—” Bucky’s choked. The heat on his back has nothing on the heat inside of him, this thought that if everything ceases to end and somehow only takes you, it might as well take him, too. “It’s gonna wreck me. If you go—if you disappear. Don’t do it. Don’t you dare fuckin’ do it.”

Your smile only widens. 

“I can’t wreck you, James,” you lean closer to him, letting all your weight rest in him. “I like you all put together. The whole picture… is beautiful.”

It makes him laugh. It’s comic. “You can’t?” You had. In one year—eleven months, a few days, and some hours. 

Over thirty six missions, countless nights spent together by now. Fighting. Training. Talking. Opening up under the powerful, yellow light of the Moon lighting up the sky in New York, while Bucky could only think of ‘how did my life end up here, like this after everything’. You already had wrecked him. You gave him back this. Bucky presses his forehead on yours, and lets his heart come out from everywhere.

Screw his sleeve—Bucky let it come out of his eyes, his lips, his chest that pressed into yours.

“Can’t you see how wrecked I already am for you?” When was the last time he cried?

Bucky lost any notion he still knew how to.

Then, he felt something coming between the waves wetting his vision—he felt plushy, comforting lips pressing against his, louder and hotter than any magical obr or other parallel universe could ever be, and he fell apart.Bucky fell apart in your lips, and was put together by your hands and arms wrapping around him, holding him in place. Bucky was held by you, and felt light and dark enveloping him all around. Bucky saw a green light, and he suddenly was overwhelmed by the nostalgic taste of home, which he’d long ago forgotten.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ* . join my Fireplace celebration. * | send me mail 💌

[sashaisready]

Chapter Six - You Already Know

Bucky Barnes Mob AU x Femme Reader

You're hard at work in Pepper's Bakery when notorious mob boss James 'Bucky' Barnes darkens your doorway one typical afternoon, and life is never the same again.

18+ - see Masterlist for full list of warnings

Series Masterlist

Chapter 7

You felt like a zombie during your shift, lifting your limbs was like wading through water. You’d nearly called out sick, but didn’t want to leave Wanda to hold the fort by herself – especially if Bucky and his stalkery thugs paid a visit. You had hardly slept after you discovered Sam in the car. It was unsettling. You wondered how long Bucky had been doing it, kicking yourself for being too oblivious to notice that you were being followed. You hated how violated it made you feel.

You had gone to work looking at each car that passed you, eyes searching for the familiar vehicle. You checked parked cars, cars halting at stop signs, cars turning down parallel streets. You didn’t see anything, but resented the paranoid wreck you’d become in a matter of hours. Then it hit you that they might have switched vehicles and you’d have no idea if they’d already passed you.

Wanda took one look at you and knew something was off, grilling you until you gave it up. You were embarrassed, truth be told. You’d gushed to her about Bucky and then you had to confess that he’d had you followed for God only knows how long. You felt foolish. It was arrogant of you to think you could tease a mob boss for months on end without any consequences.

Wanda’s eyes bugged in shock, horrified by this development.

“That’s so fucked up…” she said gently.

“Yep” you sighed sadly as you laid out the fresh stock.

“And you haven’t spoken to him since?”

You shook your head, stifling a yawn. “Nope…But if I had a crystal ball I’d assume that might change today”.

Wanda thought hard. “Are you going to go to the cops?”

You glared at her. “And say what? The employees of a man I flirt with at my bakery were parked outside my house at 3am on a public road where anyone can drive? They didn’t approach me, they were just sleeping in their car? Oh and that man just happens to be notorious mob boss Bucky Barnes, who you probably take bribes from?” you respond, sharper than you intended to.

Wanda gritted her teeth. “Well…when you put it like that…”

You sighed again. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you. I know you’re trying to help. I’m just tired. And y’know…weirded out”.

Wanda nodded. She moved towards you and pulled you in for a hug. You accepted it gladly, allowing her embrace to comfort you.

“Thanks…I needed that” you murmur.

“Anytime. Look…I don’t mean to scare you, but I have to ask. Do you…do you think you’re in danger?” she asks cautiously.

You pause for a moment, considering the question. “Honestly? No. I don’t feel like I’m at risk. I’m just…very spooked” you explain.

Wanda nods, chewing her lip. You can tell she’s worried.

The bell above the door rings, breaking you two from your thoughts. Your heads spin to check who it is, only to see Bucky, Steve and Sam walk in. Their faces are solemn, it suddenly feels very warm in the room, as if you are standing right by the oven.

“Morning, gentleman” you call over to them, your tone indignant. “I would tell you what our specials are today, but I’m guessing you have already sent someone by to check”.

Bucky exhales, staring at you fiercely. His eyes are as penetrating as ever, hard to tear away from.

“Can we talk?” he asks gruffly.

You pretend to think for a moment. “Uh…no” you fire back sarcastically.

“C’mon Doll…” he replies, taking a hesitant step towards you.

“Don’t call me that” you spit.

He holds his hands up defensively. “Alright. I won’t. Look, I just want five minutes of your time. No tricks. And then I’ll be out of your way. Deal?”

You eye him suspiciously. “Just five, and then you’ll leave?”

He nods. “You have my word”.

“And you’re not going to send your goons to follow me home or anything creepy?” you ask sternly.

He shakes his head. “Nobody is going anywhere near you. I promise”.

You glance over at Wanda who gives you a small smile, reminding you that she’s here if you need her.

Your head snaps back to Bucky. “Alright, five minutes. But I don't want an audience”. You look to his men.

Bucky signals to Steve and Sam who swiftly exit the shop. You follow behind them to the front door, putting the latch on and flipping the ‘We’ll be right back!” sign in the window to be sure that you aren’t interrupted by any customers. Wanda looks at you expectantly but you nod to show you’re okay, she nods back before disappearing into the back room.

You fold your arms in front of your chest and lean against the counter, waiting for Bucky’s justification.

He clears his throat and begins to speak “So-”

“How long?” you interrupt briskly.

“What…?”

“How long?” you repeat, knowing full well he understands what you’re asking.

“Uh…since the start” he admits sheepishly.

You splutter. “Jesus fucking Christ” you hiss, covering your eyes with your hands.

“Look, I’m sorry. I know it’s a lot…”

“It’s so creepy! What the fuck?” you bark.

“Can you just let me talk? Please?” he snaps back, irritated now.

You shrug angrily and wave a hand gesturing him to speak.

“I’m sorry. I know how this must look. It must’ve been scary for you when you found them. You were never supposed to know…”

“Oh, well that’s fine then!” you scoff.

He looks at you warningly and you roll your eyes, allowing him to continue.

“…The fact is I do a lot of that. It comes with my job. After that first day I knew we’d be coming here a lot because the food was good and the men would want to. And that means I’d be interacting with you a lot. And that means I had to check you out. I have enemies everywhere, Doll. You’d be amazed. And you’d be handling my food so…”

You scoff. “Oh come on Tony Soprano, I’m just a Baker”.

“I know that now. But I didn’t. Look, I know it sounds crazy. But you know who I am. What I do” he looks at you earnestly, his eyes glued to yours as he talks.

“Also Tony Soprano is in the mafia…not the mob…”

You scowl at him and he holds his hand out defensively. 

“Not the time…okay I get it…”

He takes a breath and continues.

“Years ago, I started going to this coffee shop downtown. Loved the place, went several times a week. Until one day I’m grabbing my latte and the damn manager tries to turn a gun on me. Turns out an old client of mine with a grudge had cornered him, tells him he knows I’m in his shop every week and offered him $3000 to take me out when my guard is down. Said he could guarantee the cops wouldn't pursue it either. He didn’t get very far, poor kid had never pulled a trigger in his life, but it made me very cautious about where I spend my money, you get it?”

You gasp. “God, that’s horrible…”

He nods. “I know. $3k? I’m worth more than that…” he chuckles.

You shake your head with disapproval but are unable to hide your smirk.

“So you see, that’s what it was. Just to check you weren’t going to be slipping arsenic into my doughnuts or meeting with any of my...ex associates. And so we kept an eye on you. Maximoff too, very briefly”.

Your eyes widen as you listen to him talk, shocked by how casual he is about it all.

“It was soon pretty obvious to us that you weren’t cold blooded killers and didn't have any criminal ties. And here’s where I fucked up…because I know I should’ve stopped but…I don’t know. I started enjoying my time with you more and more. And I started feeling protective of you, I just wanted to make sure you were safe. So my men continued to keep an eye on you. It wasn’t all the time, just here and there. I know it’s creepy and you have every right to be mad…but that’s why. I’m sorry I scared you. I promise they won’t do it anymore. I think sometimes I’m so caught up in my world that I forget how it appears to people outside of it”.

You’re struck by the sincerity of his tone, if he was spinning you a yarn to keep you sweet then he was doing it convincingly. You open your mouth to speak, but no words come to you as you try to absorb everything you’ve heard. You’re horrified that you’ve been followed without your knowledge, your instincts tell you to get as far away from this man as you can. Yet a tiny part of you lights up at his admission that he enjoys his time with you, and that this was all motivated by wanting to protect you – as twisted as that might be. You're like a moth to a flame, unable to keep away.

“You don’t have to protect me” you reply with irritation. 

He nods, the beginnings of a warm smile curling onto his perfect mouth. “I know. I’ve overstepped, I’m really sorry”.

You find yourself annoyed that you can feel yourself relenting. He’s just so smooth, his words roll off his tongue so effortlessly – his charm envelopes you as you’re swept downstream, unable to keep your head above water. If he’s manipulating you then he’s doing a great job.

“You really enjoy your time with me?” you ask shyly.

He grins, cocking his head to the side as he drinks you in.

“Well, put it this way. This bakery is all the way across town from my home. I can’t get here without getting stuck in traffic, and I pass at least three other bakeries on the way. I've spent thousands of dollars in here. So what do you think?”

You blush, dropping your eyes to the floor. “Well, we are the best…” you reply gently.

His grin widens. “That’s also true”.

You sigh. “Alright. You’re not totally forgiven…but let’s put it behind us. BUT I don’t want to see an SUV anywhere near me from now on”.

He exhales, clasping his hands together in gratitude. “Thank-you, that means a lot to me”.

He leans in and places a gentle kiss on your cheek, your face burning as his lips make contact with your skin.

You nod, slightly flustered by the whole exchange.

“I should get going” Bucky says as he checks the time on his phone. “But I’m glad we straightened this out”.

You nod again, still slightly unnerved by it all, but giddy from his attention.

“Hey, do you think I could get your number?” he asks, handing you his phone.

You feel a surge of excitement in your belly, nodding as you take it from him and add yourself to his contacts. A burst of images fly through your head – being on a date with him, kissing him, walking hand in hand, sinking onto a mattress with him…

“I’m surprised you don’t already have it…” you say coyly as you pass the phone back.

He smirks, looking at the entry in his phone. “Well, I could’ve…but I thought you’d prefer the old fashioned way”. He winks at you as he heads to the door.

“Bucky…” you call out to him.

He turns to face you expectantly, one hand already on the door.

“What…uh…what happened to the coffee shop guy with the gun?” you find yourself asking, unable to resist scratching that itch.

Bucky’s face hardens, he drops his gaze to the floor momentarily before his focus shifts back to you again. His eyes are suddenly cold, a world away from the affection you found in them just moments before.

“You sure you want to know?” he asks chillily.

You pause, shaking your head as you stare at your feet.

You already know.

His face softens again, flipping over the sign and unlatching the door.

“I’ll see you around, Doll”.

[purplehairedwonder]

Chapter 1079: The Kids Are(n’t) All Right

It’s been a little while since I’ve done a chapter write-up for a variety of reasons (vacation, illness, lack of interest in the who dunnit story), but this chapter got me back on the bandwagon. Wow.

So, we get the background of how York set up the who dunnit. My main interest here is what contingency she’s talking about, especially when we see this...

This has to be Kuzan, right? Blackbeard should still be fighting Law -- but even if that fight is over, I doubt he’d have time to get to Egghead afterward. Plus, with all the references to Ohara, it really shouldn’t be anyone else.

Then we switch to the main event.

Interesting that Shanks’ fleet is actually quite weak. It seems like he takes on quirky people, much like Luffy. They are incredibly loyal to him while he has the strength to protect them.

Shanks is giving the Worst Gen respect. Him asking about Kid’s injuries reminds me of these panels from his appearance in Wano:

Shanks clearly sees fighting against weakened opponents to be dishonorable, so he steps in between Greenbull and the victors in Wano who are still recovering. But by the time the Kid Pirates run into the Red Hairs, they’ve healed so are fair game.

Also super interested in this moment. Shanks is keeping an eye on Blackbeard, but he doesn’t have the most up-to-date info about what’s happening at Winner Island. 

Interestingly, though, this does seem to explain why Shanks showed up at the end of Wano (other than to promote Film Red); he must have expected Blackbeard to show up like Greenbull did to steal Poneglyphs. And he wasn’t wrong about the plot, just the location of the ambush.

This moment is also telling to me. If Shanks is the type of person who takes the weak under his banner to protect them, he’s going to find someone like Kid, who got his bounty pre-Sabaody from killing indiscriminately, detestable.

And then he uses Future Sight to see Kid doing some serious damage to his fleet:

This would actually have been hella impressive of Kid if he’d managed to do it. Not only did he build and fire the ray gun, but he was also pulling the ships into range as he did it.

But, we’ve known Shanks’ ethos since chapter 1:

So, if Shanks’ fleet is in danger, he’s going to take care of it himself. It’s definitely a testament to the danger Kid now poses that Shanks is the one to act, rather than leave it to others as we’ve seen him do previously, and he uses this move:

EXCUSE ME, SIR. This is the same move Roger used on Oden.

So, in a twisted way, Kid’s being given his due. (I’ll also look forward to this being animated because the double page is... hard to make out in places. Oda’s action sequences are often hard for me to follow.)

Random: I still can’t help but see a comparison between Future Sight and Minority Report. Kid technically hasn’t done anything yet, but Shanks is wrecking him like he’s avenging his friends.

Anyway, Kid and Killer are in a bad way.

And neither of them can swim because of their Devil Fruit/SMILE. Which is bad because Dory and Broggy completely wreck the Victoria Punk.

And everyone goes tumbling into the sea.

This chapter has been one callback after another, and these final panels are yet another callback:

And we all know what happened after that, so the paralleled language could indicate that the Kid Pirates will come back stronger in the future, but I’m not sure how much time there is left in the narrative for that.

As for what this might mean for Law, well, I’m less worried than a lot of people seem to be. For one thing, Law got a new goal in Wano (to learn about the Will of D.), so he needs to achieve that goal before he dies. It’s important to note that Law’s goal does not conflict with Luffy’s whereas Kid’s did, so Kid not achieving his dream was inevitable. Law, on the other hand, has become the audience’s way into the Will of D. mystery by being the only D. we’ve met who is interested in his name. 

Second, we’ve still got the mystery surrounding Rocky Port and all the key players are in the same orbit at the moment. It would narratively make the most sense for Law to survive so he, Blackbeard, and Coby end up in one place so we learn what happened there.

Third, Law wasn’t the aggressor in his fight -- he was ambushed -- while Kid was. Narratively, Kid is being punished for his arrogance while Law has no such narrative dictate.

Fourth, I just keep thinking about how Cora died for Law to live. It would sure feel unfulfilling for Law to finally be free of the chains that kept him chained down for thirteen years only to die unceremoniously.

Anyway, I still think it’s most likely that Law gets taken captive by Blackbeard, leading to some interesting dynamics with Coby, Pudding, and Garp. There would be so much gold to mine there.

[onlyjaeyun]

This chapter took me alllll the way apart. I feel like there are two conversations going on between them right now. One is with their words and the things they say. The other and (dare I say) more authentic one is with actions.

Their relationship started as a pairs skating partnership. That is an incredibly intimate (not even in a sexual way—I mean they were kids) relationship and the primary way you communicate is in a relationship like that is with your body. You trust each other with your body. You support each other with your body. It’s all in what you do and how you physically relate to each other.

Their words are so harsh and fierce (at least they were until this chapter) but what they DO is what is REALLY revealing their story.

When Hoon left her the first time with no aftercare, it broke her. Because they did something so intimate and then he did not ACT in a way that was considerate of her. That wrecked her. She can’t even be in that same position again. But that messed HIM up too honestly. Because he IMMEDIATELY did something to make up for it. He beat up Jaemin. He had to. Was COMPELLED to because he could never truly just take from her and walk away.

The next series of action play out like this beautiful unspoken dance... He restored balance by wrecking Jaemin and immediately went after her. Separated her from Fuma systematically. Established their connection to his face. Kissed her lips after he saw her kiss Fuma. Put her in his clothes…That connection that they have is like a gaping hole when they aren’t together. They grew up together. It was a part of them. Once they reactivated it there was never going to be any going back.

Nearly every day they were together. Then those boys came for her and made her cry and he went 3 against 1. Wrecked. She’s his girl. It’s just that neither of them recognize it yet. She doesn’t want anyone else. She said it herself. (Lowkey I am DYING for some possessive moments from Hoon—like during intimacy—as well as their other interactions—there have already been many but I sense—especially after this—that there will be more. (Especially with her staying with Shotaro 👀 —I mean the TaroFlake relationship is mad platonic buuuut Hoon may not get that.)

Anyways this night is just a huge culmination of all those things. He comes to her space. They stare at each other. Snowflake physically reacts to his laughter (I WAS WAITING FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS OMG). They verbally protest Hee’s dare but never physically do because they need to be close to each other. And then… THE NOD—

The moment he answered her with the head nod… That was huge for me. For both of them, their body responds when their words can’t. (I love the parallel you drew with them both having to nod to answer the hard questions—the vulnerable questions THIS is what puts you a cut above the rest) It’s just so clear that the foundation of what they built together all those years ago is still there. Their connection is just too deep. And those moments when they almost unintentionally (physically) access it again—it just hits so hard. I’m—🥺

He came to her space then he calls her to his.

The way he HAS to know if she is ok. I can’t wait till she finds out he beat them too 💀—and she’s honest with him… honestly I feel like this interaction is one of the first if not the first time their verbal exchange truly begins to mirror what is going on with their bodies (and hearts).

She finds out that he fought for her and she is immediately ready to come back and meet him with her own actions. Telling him the truth about why she cried. Riding him without protection… Yes it’s hot but it’s EVERYTHING.

She never let the others do it.

Because they weren’t HIM.

They haven’t fought for her like he has. They haven’t bled for her like he has. They haven’t built a part of their souls together like the two of them have. Letting him into her is not like it is with other people because HE is already there. In way too deep. And of course he’s never let anyone as close as he let her. Of course. This act of vulnerability is just so huge for both of them. Because I know they swore they would never be vulnerable to each other again but they were and they are.

And don’t eeeeeven get me started on the mirror. He built her up where she could see herself. It’s breathtaking. He puts her in a position of power with both his words and his actions and MAKES her SEE it. Freaking Poetry.

And when he says “please I don’t want this to end”—I feel like he’s not just talking about their encounter—he’s talking about really—truly—being CLOSE to her again.

And the kiss. Such a beautiful intimate act.

Showering together is really a very intimate act. Trust me. That is not something you just randomly share with people. Like there is a strange sort of domestic closeness there that is just lovely to put them in. And he offers it to her because he doesn’t want her to leave…

And he talks with her. There’s conversation (DYING to know what they talked about!! Riki? The team? When they first suspected Heeki was happening?)… The verbal barriers are finally coming down.

But he send her home in his clothes again. A sweatshirt this time. Covers even more of her body than the t-shirt in his clothes—casually possessive. And she puts it on…

I love how you ended it with him FINALLY questioning his own feeling in a truly meaningful way.

She didn’t just make him feel good in bed. She made him FEEL good. Just feel good.

And that’s everything.

Passion is such a strong overarching theme with them. They shared a passion for skating. They passionately hate each other and they passionately are drawn to each other again and again. I am just sighing and kicking my feet. I really do be daydreaming about them.

I physically cannot wait for what is next. I (think I) saw you were taking a break for a few days after putting out this chapter and that is so well deserved. I hope you have a wonderful rest and do amazing on your exams! Thank you so so much for this chapter. It was (somehow) even BETTER than I could have hoped for.

here's the second part of said ask mentioned previously and i think you guys understand what i mean when i say i keep rereading them because of how amazing they are. it will forever leave me mesmerized but also incredibly impressed and actually quite proud to see such deep analysis and thoughts regarding something i wrote and ive actually been thinking about what to respond for so long but every time injust find myself stuck because i'm so 🥺 speechless??? i love your interpretation of things and the way you view and love my characters, you're giving me one of the biggest gifts a writer could receive and i hope you know that. no amount of words of gratitude will ever be enough to express what these asks mean to me. thank you so much baby 🥺 i will forever keep these close to my heart 🥺💗

[effieandtim]

I have not felt this emotional since watching it’s a sin (another great show about AIDS/HIV by Russel T Davies - there is a character on there that reminds me so much of Tim).

I can’t really articulate at the moment how I feel. I’m glad Lucy was able to be free in that she finally separated from Hawk; and in a way Hawk is now free too. I’m glad that the last of Tim we saw was him fighting and honestly the fact that Tim let Hawk go was like idk what to think. I’m so glad that I discovered JB by watching this show. I remember seeing the trailer and being like oh I recognise that guy from the gifs of that show on here. And because of that fell in love with him.

I think shows like this always make me emotional just because it’s such a close time in history (a good 40 years now), I’ve learnt a lot by watching this show, and I feel like I’d recommend it to anyone wanting to know about that hidden part of history.

I like to think after that Hawk was maybe a bit more free to be himself after. I think Frankie’s partner (I forgot his name okay) had probably the best development and I love how he and Frankie basically adopted that kid. Do I think Hawk will interact with those guys after Tim’s death? I hope so?

Also the sadness in Tim’s eyes about the hospital when he saw Jackson. I don’t know what to think? Was he grieving because Hawk basically abandoned him to start a new family and betrayed him? I guess it also makes sense considering their interactions on the 60s?

no fr i am still a wreck and its been almost 12 hours since i watxhed the ep like this is a show that will always stay with me

yeah i totally agree, i loved that they didnt show tim’s death and the last memory we have of him as an audience is him doing what he wanted to do - to fight for a better future, a future he knew he wouldnt live long enough to see

that’s who tim was - he wasnt a victim but a fighter till the very end

frankie’s partner is marcus, and yess i loved his development esp the parallels between him and hawk - and def him being black played a role in it too

i think that scene with tim seeing jackson was so underrated but SO BEAUTIFUL like give jonathan all the awards because you can SEE tim’s heart break but also he is fundamentally a good man, and i think in that moment he accepts that he and hawk will never have a future, i think in that moment, he let hawk go

like every moment after that in the 60s, 70s, and 80s tim never had any expectations from hawk regarding him choosing tim over his family, and i think its THAT moment when he saw jackson - an innocent baby boy and a part of hawk, a future that tim would never be able to share with hawk - that made him realise this and he let hawk go

[khickuwa]

My thoughts on “A Dream of Benji” - Luke’s Fluffy Fuzzy Time Card

so I had the privilege (or the misfortune, depends on how you’d view it lmao /lh) of getting and reading Luke’s new FFT card. I haven't seen anyone talking about it yet, and I have many thoughts about it so.... To anyone who hasn’t read it yet, beware I’ll be discussing spoilers (come back when you’ve read it please I promise you you won’t regret it) and as everyone else probably mention it’s probably best to read this after the FFT event (or at least after completing Benji’s route) 

BUT I MUST SAY, this card has surprisingly became one of my favorite Luke cards (in  terms of the art as well I mean look at THEM(tm) LAYING DOWN IN A MEADOW OF FLOWER... MISS ROSA LOOKS SO ESPECIALLY PRETTY HERE LIKE) right up there with Luke’s 1st anniversary card “Under the Milky Way” and Luke’s “Shape of You” card. I know everyone is probably saving up for the second anniversary (I really need to save up to I haven’t been playing as much last month) but if you do have the s-chips to get the card like... *grabs you in a chokehold* it’s so good. I promise you it’s really worth it.

Though disclaimer!  These are just my thoughts (I’ve been up all night thinking about a virtual dog... Please I Am Not Okay) feel free to disagree! I’ll be discussing about character death and Luke’s illness, so if you ain’t good with that feel free to skip this!

Okay, moving on.

Hoyoverse. What the actual fuck. (YOU THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE A CUTE CARD? CUTE EVENT? TAKING CARE OF VIRTUAL ANIMALS?  A FLUFFY FUZZY FUN TIME!?!? WRONG. ABSOLUTELY WRONG.) This whole card was so incredibly devastating and yet it’s so hopeful at the same time. They really hammered in the idea of “inevitability” and “hopeful anticipation”  irt actualbird's journal of NXX Investigation Team Behavioral Studies. To me at least, this card is like everything that makes Luke... Luke... condensed into a card.

About Benji  (you sweet sweet boy):

Immediately right in the first story, Benji is admitted into hospital and it’s very much obvious that... Benji, a retired 9-year old military dog, doesn’t have much time left.

Benji, obviously, is very much a parallel to Luke Pearce... As I was reading the card, Benji’s situation almost feels like a peek into of what could be Luke’s Future... what could become of Luke. Once great and majestic dog plowing through a vast field of snow, saving hostages along side other agent... now so frail, the wear and tear of old injuries, old age and illness is finally getting to Benji. 

...and in Luke’s own words: “Is he still the same Benji from my memories.”

Luke and Rosa decides to take Benji into a dog park, where they hope to give Benji some sort of “freedom”... for Benji to finally some semblance of living life as a normal dog. It still had to be catered in a way that was familiar to Benji... and this is sort of scattered around through out between the event stories and the card. eg. making custom training dumbbells, planning training regiments, recreating a hostage situation. Even when Benji is retired, he's still yearning to go back... eg looking back to the direction of military base. Because in the end of the day, that’s all Benji Knows. His Whole Life has Always Been a Mission to Benji.

Then Mr. Henderson, a man in the dog park who's also grieving about his late dog, who's also a retired military dog. And while Luke was able to open up to this man, as both have/are going through the same grief. But MAN did that interaction cause Luke to spiral downwards.

Even in what I would say Benji’s last moments with Luke and Rosa, the way that Luke had to dismiss Benji of his “duty” this way. (I’m not okay, I’m not okay, THIS DIALOGUE WRECKED ME)

About Luke (ah here we go again):

After being subsequently punched multiple times in the face by “LOOK BENJI/LUKE PARALLELS, LOOK AT IT. LOOK AT IT!!!”

As I’m going “NO BENJI UWAH QAQ” every second through this card... I also can’t help but fear for Luke. It really made me think that... let’s say even if NSB drops Luke the moment he was diagnosed with the illness and three years left to live, I really do wonder if he would’ve been able to cope with it... or otherwise live with himself? 

Luke as we know it, has this whole self deprecating deal of avoiding and hesitating happiness. The way I see it, he often times try to make himself seem "small" in a way, that he prioritizes other people's needs first before his own. And I would imagine the last thing he'd want for himself is to become a burden/useless. If one day Luke does retire from NSB, one would think that he'd be free... but not really either. I can imagine him being sort of like "what now?" (i can sort imagine luke entering this phase of adjusting back to normal life when he's back in Stellis. this brings me to the headcanon of luke's... questionable lifestyle is a product of Luke having to readjust to normal life /i’m sorry i made fun of your kitchen and my boy, you probably had to make do what with what you had.)

If think about Luke lying in a hospital bed, nearing the end of his life. I'm Going To Lose It (tm). But looking at Benji all old and sickly... I really can’t help imagine that IF it were to happen, it would probably go down the same way it did for Benji. (I Am Going To Cry)

Anyways, after the conversation with Mr. Henderson, Luke spirals down into thoughts of "if I didn't left you, would things have been different?", “we could’ve been happier, if only I had made the “right” choice. (and I wanna grab him by the shoulders and then scream at him “LUKE STOP BAD >:C”)

About Rosa (YOU GO GIRL SLAY):

NOW, HONESTLY. ROSA REALLY DO SHINE IN THIS CARD. HER RESPONSE TO BENJI. HER RESPONSE TO HER SAD LITTLE BOYFRIEND GRIEFING AN SPIRALING DOWN. THIS IS WHY SHE IS THE MC(TM) AAA

but more than that, this card somehow not only showcase her strengths but also how this somehow becomes a weakness as well (at least to me). 

Rosa to me, comes off someone who really looks on straight ahead and her focus on what she can do in the present, in contrast to Luke’s tendency to focus on past regrets and uncertain tomorrows. I would argue that she also has this like- perseverance/stubbornness against adversities and I would say that her solutions also come off as very head on?. (could you imagine having to argue with your lawyer girlfriend, like nah... you ain’t winning for sure.)

(”But that’s for dogs” I’m laughing through TEARS OMG - Luke is Dog-Coded FR) But Rosa in here is really ain’t letting Luke go, forcing Luke to Actually Look into her Eyes and tell her What’s Wrong. (LukeRosa nose booping omg...this is how they comfort each other in my head from now on) Which yes, sometimes I think Luke does need someone who can hold him back before he retreats, but also at the same time... after this exchange, Rosa realizes that it’s not really quite enough to erase his worries. And I think this is also the exact moment Rosa realizes that not all problems could be solved immediately... sometimes you have to let time do its thing and just.. sit with it. 

(Rosa calling in an animal psychologist... like did she just searched on up in the internet for consultation like pls Rosa) In Story 5 (I’d put in every screenshot from this part if I could), we go on the Benji’s “rescue mission”, I kinda enjoyed how Rosa does fumble a bit here and there... though with good intentions, perhaps the overly familiar environment was over-stimulating to Benji? which caused him to attack Luke somehow... But anyways... It seems that Benji still thinks that he’s on service and it’s not when Luke “dismissed” him of his “duties does Benji stop and Luke, just so full of grief, wondering why Benji couldn’t just forget the past. And Rosa really isn’t holding back with her words when she says:

“Why does Benji have to forget the past?” “

Have you ever thought that perhaps Benji is proud of himself for being a military dog?” 

“You said before if Benji wasn’t a military dog, he could probably lead a happier life.”

“But Luke, you and I are not Benji, We can never understand Benji’s true feelings.”

“And we can’t just make wild guesses about whether Benji would have ended in a better situation if he had made a different choice...

“Because it will never happen”

Because it will never happen....

MISS ROSA I-

“But how are you sure a “perfect and flawless” choice exists in this world”

“Luke, are you sure that if one makes a different choice, one’s ending will be better?”

I just really love Rosa for this because she just so... incredibly focused in the present and taking one’s autonomy. And this is probably so reassuring to Luke (and to me) cause she’s basically saying “regardless of what happens, we will be fine.” 

And I don’t think Rosa has ever blamed Luke for leaving, for having a dangerous job, nor for getting diagnosed with only 3-years left to live. SHE JUST LOVES HIM SO MUCH OUEUEUEUEUOOO!!! Even. EVEN. if Luke’s condition does turn for the worse, I really do think that Luke is in very VERY capable hands. AND THAT’S SO REASSURING TO ME? As much as I Really Don’t Want Luke to Die (Please Find A Cure For Him), but just the thought that Rosa is going to be there for him (just as he will be there for her) regardless of whatever happens to the both of them, it will always be the “best ending”.

I’m just so happy that Rosa’s answer to Benji’s case is really just to ensure that Benji lives the last few days of his life... happy. and IT’S SUCH A ROSA ANSWER PLS... Even with Luke as well, even with knowing all the risks of staying with Luke, she’d rather make the most out of the remaining time they have. But even so, she’s still so full of hope! “As long as we’re not at the end of the path, there’ll be boundless possibilities” 

Luke is the Definition of Devotion, BUT CAN WE TALK ABOUT ROSA? It’s so subtle, but I really can’t deny that Rosa does really really really love Luke too, in a way that she’s going to be there for him... for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death. (HOLDS THEM BOTH IN THE PALM OF MY HANDS UUUUUOEOEOOEOE)

When Benji finally passes away peacefully in a quiet afternoon, with Luke and Rosa at his side, I really do think that this is the best ending for him. RIP Benji, you were the goodest boy. 

[quillyfied]

I’m sorry I’m so sorry but STAGED SERIES 3 WAS FILMED AFTER GOOD OMENS SEASON 2 WAS DONE FILMING. Staged series 3 aired about NINE MONTHS before Good Omens season 2. Staged series 3 ends with a long shot of David and Michael staring at each other across a table and within zoom screens as the set is dismantled around them and they bid a goodbye to this program that popped up during a time they needed it but isn’t needed anymore. Just. Staring. At each other. I think they’re even on the correct sides of the screen. I’m not sure right now. BUT. THEY SURELY HAD TO KNOW. THEY HAD TO KNOW THAT WAS GOING TO BE THE EDITING CHOICE MADE FOR THE SEASON 2 FINALE. THE SERIES 3 ENDING IS TOO POINTED. And if they didn’t know. WHAT A COINCIDENCE. Unless the Staged finale is what influenced the GO2 finale. And. It’s. It’s just. Michael voicing that he needs a break from “Michael and David.” David being afraid to let go but being encouraged that it’s the best choice. Stepping forward into a new world as separate and healthier entities. They aren’t the same story but the parallels and the connections and the flips of the scripts HURT ME.

I AM AN EMOTIONAL WRECK AND SCREAMING INTO THE VOID SEND HELP.

[blackwolfstabs]

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 25

MOVIE

The Core Four + more go to see the FNAF movie.

Chad added Mindy to the group.

Chad added Tara to the group.

Chad added Sam to the group.

Chad added Danny to the group.

Chad added Kirby to the group.

Chad added Gale to the group.

Chad named the group chat “🐻🐰 FNAF 🦊🐤”.

Chad: Made this bc we can’t talk during the movie. I’m gonna start by saying that kid showed all signs of being kidnapped tf? Mike shouldn’t have been fired for that 😑

Tara: actually u made it bc Mindy told us to “shut the fuck up” lol

Tara: but fr fr

Mindy: ARE YOU SERIOUS?? You made a chat…

Chad: Yup

Gale: This defeats the whole purpose of watching the movie.

Sam: And phones aren’t allowed in the theater.

Tara: oh really?? Kirby r u gonna arrest us for texting in the movie theater???

Chad: I’m not gonna be able to stay quiet. I have thoughts and I must speak them.

Chad: Somebody quote that

Danny: Quoted.

Kirby: No, I’m not but I might mute the chat fr

Chad: Thank you Danny 🫡

Gale: Seriously. How are you all going to text and watch at the same time?

Sam: Bet it’s just going to turn into Chad and Tara texting “wait what just happened” after ever moment the music gets loud and they were too busy looking at their phones

Chad: Joke’s on YOU Sam cuz you’ll be missing the movie trying to tell us what happened lmfao

Tara: yeah and that’s literally ur boyfriend all the time. Danny’s clueless 24/7. #sendhelp4danny

Kirby: Just watch the damn movie!

Danny: replied to “yeah and that’s literally ur boyfriend all the time. Danny’s clueless 24/7. #sendhelp4danny”: What was just said on screen?

Tara: . . . . .

Sam: That’s what I thought. #sendhelp4Tarabcshesclueless in the chat

Danny: emphasized “That’s what I thought. #sendhelp4Tarabcshesclueless in the chat”

Danny: #sendhelp4Tarabcshesclueless

Kirby: #sendhelp4Tarabcshesclueless

Gale: #sendhelp4Tarabcshesclueless

Chad: #sendhelp4sam&dannybctheyareannoying&interruptingthemovie

Sam: 🖕

Tara: PFFT

Mindy: HOLY FUCKING SHIT AKJBDFLADSGFLWKSKLBFLA EVERYBODY SHUT UP STEVE RAGLAND LOOKS JUST LIKE STU MACHER HOLY FUCK

Gale: No fucking way…

Kirby: OMFG YES FUCKING WAY

Sam: I’m uncomfortable

Chad: God Mindy you’re such a nerd

Tara: she’s not wrong tho fuck. . . 🫢

Danny: Who?

Mindy: STU MACHER THE ONE WHO WAS KILLED BY THE TV IN THE OG STAB!!! HE WAS THE OTHER GHOSTFACE ALONGSIDE BILLY LOOMIS

Tara: see??? i told u. buddy’s cLuElEsS xD

Sam: Tara, will you stop?

Danny: Oh okay.

Tara: no

Gale: Wait, isn't there that conspiracy that he didn’t die and is still alive?

Chad: So what, he became an actor and is in FNAF?? 😂

Tara: could be a doppelganger?? i’m convinced we all have one running around the world somewhere lol

Mindy: Uhhhhh YEAH OBVIOUSLY

Gale: It’s not Stu Macher, Mindy.

Mindy: But what if it is?

Tara: sPoOkY 👻

Kirby: Does anyone want any popcorn? I can pass it down

Tara: yes pls

Tara: ok 🛑‼️KAREN ALERT‼️🛑 this aunt jane lady is a full-blooded KAREN fr

Danny: 👆

Chad: Karen facts

Sam: True that

Mindy: Yeah it’s her first scene and she’s already annoying the shit out of me

Tara: gEt hEr oUtTa hErE

Tara: why can i see that being Gale tho?? PFFT

Kirby: LMFAO I see it 🙋🏼‍♀️

Sam: Soooo ur saying Gale’s a Karen????

Tara: yes

Kirby: I can’t unsee it

Chad: Bahahaha!

Mindy: Don’t even get me started on the parallels 😆

Gale: Oh please, I’m not THAT much of a bitch.

Tara: yeah ok suuurree

Kirby: You literally radiate Bitch-Karen energy idgaf I’ll be the bigger person to say it 

Chad: GET WRECKED

Gale: replied to “You literally radiate bitch-karen energy idgaf I’ll be the bigger person to say it”: I hate you. 🖕

Danny: If Gale is Aunt Jane, then Kirby is Vanessa because she’s a cop. 

Gale: Tara is Abby. HA! There.

Danny: Because she’s an annoying little sister?

Sam: o.O

Gale: Precisely.

Tara: no. no fucking way. that’s NOT me AT ALL

Kirby: I’m processing this information

Mindy: Lmfao YES and Sam’s Mike 😂😂😂

Tara: replied to “Because she’s an annoying little sister?”: shut up Danny, nobody asked you. just do what you’re good at and look like ur paying attention 😤🖕

Mindy: Stubborn, immature, feisty… it definitely sounds like you Tara. 

Chad: and Mike is quiet, traumatized, and has family issues. That’s Sam. 

Chad: Ok fine it’s canon, sorry babe 🫡

Danny: emphasized “Stubborn, immature, feisty… it sure sounds like you Tara.”

Danny: emphasized “and Mike is quiet, traumatized, and has family issues. That’s Sam.”

Gale: At first I was just throwing a thought out there, but now that you mention it, they’re pretty good analogies for the Carpenters.

Kirby: Ditto

Kirby: Guess we’re FNAF characters in another universe 😂

Sam: Their relationship isn’t anything like ours tho

Chad: Sure, it is! 

Danny: Mike and Abby love each other a lot, but they fight every other day, if not every day. You and Tara do that. They have absent parents. You two do too. Mike is constantly holding down a job to support him and Abby. Sam, you do that. Abby does what she wants, regardless of what Mike says. Tara does the same thing. Sounds pretty accurate to me

Mindy: I respect the resemblance 🫡

Kirby: Whoa— 🤯

Gale: See? I know what I’m talking about, Tara. 😉

Tara: no. . . that’s 1000000% INACCURATE 

Sam: Ok maybe it’s a little similar, but still…

Chad: Round of applause for Danny! Guess he’s not so clueless after all 👏👏

Gale: 👏👏👏

Mindy: Kudos Danny kudos 👏👏👏👏

Kirby: 👏

Sam: Kudos

Tara: NO. fuck ur applauding. you guys don’t know me at all smh

Mindy: Hey T, wanna draw a picture for your friends at Freddy Fazbear’s??

Mindy: Sam, you’ll let her, right? They’re just innocent animatronics that wanna play with your sister 😁

Tara: GODDAMMIT I AM NOT ABBY!!!!

Sam: I’m not sure how to respond to that 🙃

Gale: Everyone in favor of Tara = Abby, say “aye”

Mindy: Aye 🙋🏽‍♀️

Chad: Aye-aye, dare I say (love you Tara 😘) 

Kirby: Aye

Danny: Aye 🫡

Mindy: replied to “I’m not sure how to respond to that 🙃”: Just say aye

Tara: Sam don’t you dare

Sam: I’m not. I still don’t think they’re us…

Kirby: You two are no fun

Gale: It’s all fun and games until the games turn against them.

Sam: The fun was supposed to be watching the movie! 

Danny: Alright, I’m out

Chad: Same

Tara: yeah everybody shut up so we can watch k thx bye

Mindy: Lol victory is sweet

Sam: emphasized “Alright, I’m out”

Kirby: 👌

Gale: replied to “Lol victory is sweet”: It sure is.

this one's for you @dreamersbcll - i hope you're doing a little better but if not, i hope reading this stupid little text chat will make u smile 🩶

All my best ♡ - parker