#i'd rather live without knowledge in regards to this

[jackalsraised]

A very important gifset of Sebastian Stan.

[spiritseeeker]

This singular frame was all it took to undo my very extreme hatred of Adam, Vivienne Medrano how dare you make me feel sympathy for this man-

Like, Adam before this scene? A blatant misogynist and a hypocrite who unabashedly revels in sinners' suffering. A guy who has no regard for anyone else, and who pisses pretty much every viewer off with patronizing jabs like "sorry sweetie" and "try to chillax, babe." Ugh, disgusting.

As the first man, it seems like he got an easy pass into Heaven. Maybe the angels were just saving face, given that their core pair of humans both took the fruit of knowledge of good and evil willingly, ordaining Adam on the technicality that "Eve did it first." But I think we can all agree that it was not on the merit of Adam's virtue.

And then Charlie draws blood during their fight in Episode 8, and, for the first time, Adam genuinely realizes he can be hurt. Like, for the first time in the duration of the show, in his entire fucking existence, someone shows him that he is not, in fact, an all-powerful symbol of power and superiority. He's just a guy with privilege who is just as vulnerable, just as flawed, just as human as the rest of them.

But once the mask is shattered, revealing the rather unexceptional man underneath, does Adam back down? Of course not—he doubles down. There's nothing worse than a narcissist who is virtually incapable of seeing the error of their ways, even when they're clearly backed into a corner. Bruised and bloody, he bellows that he's THE man; everybody should worship him.

For me, that pretty much hit the nail in the coffin. There was no redeeming a character like Adam (ironic, since he's one of the few characters in the show not in need of redemption).

So isn't it fitting, then, that his death didn't happen in some grand display requiring all of Lucifer or Charlie's might? Isn't it fitting that Adam falls to Niffty—not Lucifer, not an overlord, but a common sinner, who sees him as nothing more than a foot soldier that needs to be eliminated, a pest as easily squashed as a roach? For someone as self-aggrandizing as Adam, this has to be one of the most humiliating ways to die. The perfect end for an insufferable antagonist.

But nooo, Vivziepop didn't end it there.

Because INSTEAD, we hear Lute's heart-wrenching screams as she realizes that Adam has just been defeated; we see the look on her tear-streaked face when it registers just how badly he's been injured. The fear in her eyes at the prospect of living in a world without the angel she idolizes, the man she serves.

She's not concerned that she's just lost her arm, or that Vaggie is standing right there. In that moment, the only person in Hell is Adam, and all she wants is for him to stay with her.

Adam could have easily dismissed her feelings entirely. He could have spent his last breath hurling one last insult at Lucifer, getting the satisfaction of having the last word before his death. He could have thrown himself a pity party and cursed his fate.

Instead, this greedy, selfish, murderous fiend has the audacity to see Lute in his field of vision and flash her one last, tender smile.

We don't know for sure what Adam was thinking in this shot, but personally, I think it was something along the lines of I lost. Proud of you, Lute. I'll miss you. Goodbye.

Whatever his final thoughts are, we can surmise from his expression alone that he's accepted his fate, and that he's grateful his last seconds alive are locking eyes with someone who's important to him. Someone he cares about.

And THAT—that was enough to crack through that thick shell of hatred I'd developed for Adam and shatter it like the mask he wore for seven and a half episodes of the show. THAT 8-second moment was enough to make me reconsider my stance on Adam as an irredeemable villain.

(CURSE YOU, VIVIENNE!!!)

Does this scene cancel out all the heinous things Adam does throughout Season 1? All the lives he destroys, all the pain he causes to thousands upon thousands of souls? Absolutely not. But it does change my perception of Adam from "obnoxious egomaniac with no self-awareness" to "obnoxious egomaniac with no self-awareness that is a product of the flawed system he perpetuates."

And, I gotta wonder, what would Adam have been like if Heaven had been different?

[radioactive-reactions]

Just a quick little idea for a reaction, could you maybe do companions (and maybe Mr. House) finding out that the Courier is a pre-war ghoul?

Of course! The New Vegas fandom has just celebrated Mr. House's 4th birthday, so consider this my small contribution.

Ghouls were anything but uncommon in the Mojave, but those who had lived through the Great War were particularly exceptional. Everyone knew about the ghoulish Courier - zombies rising from the grave made good saloon talk, after all - but only those closest to them were trusted with the knowledge of just how old they were.

Raul is just happy to have another viejo around to commiserate with. Invariably, he begins to keep the two up long into the night trading stories of the Old World - and more often than not, the Old World's failings - around the campfire. "Hey, boss, you... you remember Cuna de Lobos? Ahh, the bomb dropped right at the end of Season 91, just when Catalina was about to show everyone what she'd been keeping stashed under her eyepatch. My grandmother would have killed to see it. She could have, too."

Boone is as unflinchingly stone-faced as ever, and his thoughts are quickly summed up in three succinct words: "I pity you." There's a moment of consideration, a realization that he may have gone too far, and he tries again. "You and all the... others. There are a few in the service. You knew what came before. Saw it with your own eyes. Christ, the rest of us must be like kids playing dressup to you. In your shoes, wouldn't have bothered staying around to see how it'd all turn out. No point."

Veronica has a million questions. Try as the Brotherhood might to hoard pre-War knowledge, she's never come quite as close to a living, breathing repository of it as she is now. "Wait, wait, back up, like... five steps. You're telling me you could walk into the bunker anytime you please and totally school Elder McNamara and you've just been sitting on that?! Oh my God! Okay, okay - is it true that every kid back then was raised by a robot slave? A-and did you really have to ritually encase all your food in Jell-O before you ate it?"

Cass gives an impressed whistle, looking the Courier up and down just to make sure they haven't actually been feral this entire time. "Fuck me. Uh, that's not an invitation - I don't want anything falling off. But that'd make you, what, two-hundred-something? Older than the Republic, the way they tell it. We've got some Rangers like that, supposedly the ultimate badasses if you look past the bad knees and the death rattle... but between you and me, I think you've got a sturdier claim to the title."

Arcade freezes up at the news, getting that awkward, wavering smile he always flashes when he's backed into a corner. "Wow. Uh... hey. Just so we're clear, I in no way endorse - o-or endorsed - the whole Enclave 'cleansing of the world's tainted' thing. I'd like to think that goes without saying, given the way my life has gone since then, but... just so we're clear. Uh, if you need any kind of specialized care, please just say the word. I've given Beatrix enough topical collagen to fill a bathtub... if one inexplicably wanted to do something like that."

Lily doesn't quite seem to get it, bless her heart, but enough careful explanation does slowly get her to regard the Courier as more of an equal than a grandkid. "MY MISTAKE! YOU DON'T LOOK A DAY OVER A HUNDRED, DEAR. WHATEVER YOU USE, I'VE JUST GOT TO GET DOCTOR HENRY TO MAKE ME SOME! IF I HADN'T MADE A PROMISE TO MY HUSBAND, REST HIS SOUL, I COULD JUST EAT YOU UP."

Mr. House predictably uses this as ammunition to further his own plans. There's no change in the face on the flickering screen, but whatever cold mental calculus drives him moves the Courier up a few spaces in his strictly regimented list of priorities. "Then you, more than anybody, understand what we have to lose - or rather, what we have to gain. Put another way, you are in a unique position to understand the resources at my disposal. Imagine the luxuries you enjoyed before the barbarians in Washington reduced you to this base, hardscrabble existence among the ruins of their shortsightedness - and I think you'll appreciate that ruins isn't simply a turn of phrase here. Imagine having them again: not just the house and the car, not just the material indulgences, but the structure that made them possible - will continue to make them possible. We alone know what's been lost, and we alone hold the potential to see it returned."

[quirrelfan]

Foreshadowing

haha get it he probably died so his final resting place is the resting grou-

The foreshadowing throughout Quirrel's dialogue is so perfectly done that I just have to talk about it. (Below the cut. This is a long one.)

As seen in the above image and below quote, an instance of such foreshadowing.

"The city looks to be built into an enormous cavern, and the rain pours down from cracks in the stone above.

There must be a lot of water up there somewhere. I suppose, if the cave roof stayed strong this long, it should hold for us.

Before I leave this Kingdom, I'd like to see where all that water comes from. What a sight it must be!"

As we know, the rain comes from Blue Lake. And I must agree, what a sight it is!

Circled location is Quirrel

It is also proved by a quote I obtained [here], where Ari Gibson himself states:

"The only area that I can think of that exists purely for narrative reasons is the Blue Lake, which is above the raining city. And it's only there because there's all this rain falling on the city, and I just couldn't bear the idea that we didn't explain where this rain was coming from. So we put this big lake above it."

Quirrel's final location he is seen at is Blue Lake, without Monomon's mask atop his head, sat down on the ground and gazing out over the gorgeous lake.

The final location before his implied death, his second and final departure of hallownest, fulfilling his wish to see the source of the rain before he leaves.

"To persevere in this ruin, that old nail alone just won't be enough. Though that's no problem! One only has to look around.

Plenty have come before us and most have met their grisly end, many more equipped than you and I.

I'm sure they wouldn't mind were a fellow explorer to relieve them of their tools. It's a kindness really. The dead shouldn't be burdened with such things."

Quirrel's death (although uncertain if he truly died as stated by one of the devs themselves, saying "we don't know," but that is a topic for another time), or rather, his nail in the ground, is foreshadowed by the above dialogue.

Quirrel believes that a weapon is a burden to oneself when dead, encouraging the Knight to pick up a stronger weapon they may find.

Upon the re-entry of Blue Lake after the Knight has spoken to Quirrel, they will discover that he seems to have left the area, the remaining evidence of his existence there being his nail, which looks intentionally stuck into the ground, tempting one to grab it and use it to its fullest potential. After all, Quirrel would not want to be burdened by his own weapon much like past explorers have been. Whether he drowned himself, withered away of old age, or had been killed by enemies, it must have been intentional due to his nail's placement.

Free from the burdens of his weapon. Of surviving. Of life. He had lived life to the fullest and had seen all that the world has offered him, his mind freed from the awful events in between.

"All tragedy erased. I see only wonders..."

That is not the end, by the way. Although it is the perfect quote to end on, I still have the random tidbits of info he remembers to cover.

"What is this feeling?... So familiar. Drawn forward yet repelled.

And those shapes upon the door...To gaze directly at them turns my mind to fog."

"That lake... a revered presence once slept deep within...

Did it? What would make me think such things?"

"There is a city nearby, the old capital of Hallownest. I've heard a Nailsmith resides there. Seek the old bug out and you may find progress that much easier."

"...Who was it that told me of the Nailsmith? I can't even remember, yet I can almost picture the smith himself..."

For someone who is exploring Hallownest along a similar path to your own journey, he seems to know some pieces of knowledge in regards to the kingdom, whether he tells the Knight of the nailsmith, or the thought of Unn being locked within his mind.

The Knight later discovers that Quirrel has been in Hallownest before, although his memory of the place is mostly blank.

"Did she call you too then? I realise it's no coincidence we arrive together.

Though much of my memory is blank, this place I recall."

Quirrel had taken part in the Teacher's sacrifice to become a seal upon the Black Egg Temple, although he cannot recall the event, thus showing he has lived in Hallownest once, but remembers nothing but small fragments of information, the tragedy of the infection blocked from his memory upon departure.

"Twice I've seen this world and though my service may have stripped the first experience from me, I'm thankful I could witness its beauty again."

ok NOW I will end with the line.

"To live an age, yet remember so little... Perhaps I should be thankful?

All tragedy erased. I see only wonders..."

Ah, foreshadowing. A beautiful thing.

[rockofeye]

Thats terrible what happened to you regarding your initiation (and congrats on becoming a parent!). I'm Caribbean and have wanted in to these traditions for so long but I've held back because I'm so afraid of someone scamming me. It's bad enough that fakers exist but your situation is a nightmare I'd rather live without

Hey,

I definitely understand the reticence but I wouldn't let bad experiences hold you back. My participation in Sosyete Nago and all the things I learned and did there were not bad experiences, but things changed from where they were when I started to what they are now, and it was no longer healthy to remain. Luckily for me, my lwa took care of me, which is ultimately the point of building relationships with spirit; even when things get wild, they stick with you and deliver you.

So, with those things in mind, I would say to not be afraid to claim your birthright. Your ancestors and spirits that walk with you will protect you, even if that protection is a bit of a scenic route.

My suggestions would be to take your time and don't let anyone hurry you. Go to ceremonies if you can and look and listen and reflect on what you see. The biggest stumbling point for folks is the presentation that anything should happen soon or in a hurry; no one needs to undertake initiation as a first step because it's not necessary and any community that presents that as an immediate option should be held as questionable. Why would you want to hurry and put your life on the line with someone you barely know?

Initiation is also not the goal of participation in spiritual communities, which folks also get tripped up on. Initiation should be an option when it is indicated as necessary, and that should be tested over a longer time period. It isn't how you get started with a community or the lwa, and isn't how you begin learning. Instead, if necessary, it should be ta mark of achievement of that learning and growing with that spiritual community. No one needs initiation to be taught how to serve their spirits appropriately or grow in knowledge and ability.

Sooo...take your time, but don't give up. Trust your ancestors and spirits to deliver you safely to where you need to be and to always maintain you and protect your ultimate peace.

[mooniety]

I know I already commented asking this so I'm sorry, but about that post of Susie's death wish to shorten her life and be with her father again, isn't it not going to work? Weren't Haltmann and his soul completely deleted from existence by Star Dream? Because if she reaches the afterlife and finds out that her death wish was doomed to fail and her dad doesn't exist anymore, then that would just make it even sadder :(

That or maybe Susie knows that and yet just doesn't have an afterlife? idk

sup man, it's cool --i tend to be quite shy when i get comments so i end up usually never replying, it's a pretty unfortunate cycle, apologies for that ^^;

however, i will let you know that i did in fact read your comment & wanted to make a follow up regarding it, so thank you for the comment & ask as well!

in summary, yes, susie's idea of a death wish isn't going to work & wasn't meant to work - however, rather than haltmann's soul being deleted from existence, i instead went with the approach that what star dream did was "corrupt" haltmann's soul - encrypting the "data" of his soul in a foreign, complex encryption algorithm closely related to the ancients' own high class encryption methods, its decryption key only known to star dream (who is now gone, so it cannot be decrypted.)

in addition, with star dream basically EXPLODING after its defeat to kirby, not only is haltmann's soul forever stuck in an impenetrable encrypted state, this encrypted data is literally spread in pieces of variable amounts all across the galaxy-- the location of each piece unknown, especially with some of the broken pieces of star dream most likely still drifting across space & maybe even other dimensions

i imagine this is how haltmann supposedly "lost" his memories of susie over time - rather than truly losing his memories, star dream was sealing them away via encryption as a monkey's paw deal for attempting to wish susie back to life

& in a way, haltmann's wish IS met - susie would manage to survive for a decade before returning from the another dimension, thus star dream, although disgustingly, rightfully took away haltmann's memories of her (i have further headcanons regarding susie being stuck in the another dimension, but i believe that is for another time)

focusing back on susie however, she indeed has knowledge of her father's current state, finding out about his encrypted memories through attempts to decrypt them herself while working under him at hwc & later finding about the state of his soul when attempting to recover hwc after star dream's destruction

her entire mentality from this awareness is a depressing form of nihilism constantly hanging over her, all in which she desperately attempts to hide behind a facade: "if the person i love the most in this world no longer exists, i no longer have any point for existing"

(un)fortunately for her, i like happy endings & even more, torturing her!™️ thus over time she regains the will to live with her newfound loved ones/found family during her time with kirby & co as well as live a longer lifespan than the one she initially hoped for (expecting to only live up to her late 60s at the very most without any robotic implants but instead living over a century)

when she finally reaches the afterlife, it's likely that haltmann may not be there, especially with his soul being the equivalent of a destroyed hard drive containing high official confidential government data, but ideas change over time & for now, i'd like the exact answer of that to be vague, as for me, susie's story is a story of hope, even in the most desolate of situations

BUT YEAH MAN'S GONE LOL

[stemms]

Hola. I have an idea.

Tommy is a prince.

This is a modern AU.

After a party……Tommy realized that he wasn’t having fun at all and wanted to go home. Usually, he would go home with a friend or two but right now…..he wanted to be alone.

So, he got on his horse and left. (He has a horse, bite me. Horses are fun!!!!)

Anyways, he is riding his horse, trying to find his way back to his castle home…..only to hear hooves pounding on the ground behind him.

He turned around, only to see a shadowy man riding a horse at full speed towards him.

Tommy, having a terrible feeling about this man, begged his horse to go faster. (He didn’t have any reigns or anything. He only has a saddle on his horse. He doesn’t want to hurt ol Clementine.)

His horse listened to the prince and raced as fast as she could while Tommy held on for dear life.

Unfortunately, the shadowy man’s horse was much faster. And thus he was able to catch up to Tommy so quickly.

Then, as the prince continued to plead for a way out-

The figure yanked him off his beloved Clementine and placed him in front of themself.

Tommy yelled out as much as he could as the figure held him close. But unfortunately, only he, the horses, and the figure were near.

And thus, he was stolen away in the night.

What do you think? Wanna develop this AU with me? XD

Hello, thank you for sharing this idea, I'm losing my mind over it hehehe :) Many of my c!Prime ideas revolve around c!Tommy's kidnapping, so this is right up my alley lol :)

I'm so emotional about c!Tommy never using reigns to avoid hurting Clementine, and the fact that begging her to go faster was more than enough because they have a Connection,,, I love them so much <3

This idea is chilling in the best way, I can vividly visualise every part of it hehehe :) And yesss, I'd love to develop it with you, it'll be fun :)

Since c!Tommy is a prince, after his disappearance was revealed, people probably assumed that it happened because of his status or wealth, right? But because he's still quite young, I imagine that his first encounter with c!Dream was marked by his childish attitude, contrasting with his status. Knowing c!Dream, c!Tommy was probably unaware of the man's presence... So, intrigued by the teen, c!Dream began stalking him, and it was only a matter of time until he claimed what was rightfully his :) :) :)

Whatever c!Dream's status was, I don't think he cared about c!Tommy being a prince, but rather the fact that he was utterly amusing, and so different from others :)

You know how princes are supposed to receive a complex education and live under strict rules? Perhaps, c!Tommy wasn't particularly dedicated and obedient in that regard? In that case, c!Dream could easily take advantage of it, and impose himself in the role of his mentor :) He probably often made him doubt his own knowledge, even in things that he knew well, so that c!Tommy could trust the man's reasoning more and obey.

Also, what if, in order to make the teen more dependent on him, c!Dream made him write and read out loud certain lines related to him? For example, "I belong to you, and you alone". "I'll be nothing without you", "I should always listen to you without questioning", "You're always right", etc.

[fire-fira]

Some further thoughts in regards to [this post] just in terms of what I personally think would make sense for all of them.

Coral: yes, keep her as the emissary for Neptunos in Poseidonis, though with both of her partners being so thoroughly tied to Poseidonis I'd include at least some hints that it doesn't come without challenges or some doubts about where her loyalties lay. She's a politician, she can handle it, but it'd be a little more intriguing to have her have to occasionally fend off criticism from people in Neptunos who might think she's getting a little 'too fond' of Poseidonis.

Topo: Historian and restorationist, full stop. He doesn't seem to me to be the type to really be comfortable being an outright politician, but as an adviser whose knowledge of history makes him an invaluable asset, he would shine. Atlantis has a looooooong history, and if you go with the headcanon that magic extends the lives of those who use it (and that the more skilled a person is, the longer they can live-- which could easily result in at least a few being hundreds of years old), then that would make his knowledge even more valuable because that history would be much more blatantly present than might otherwise be expected.

Lori: While arguments could be made for keeping Lori as a General for Tritonis, I will admit I have a fondness for the idea of Lori having thrown herself wholeheartedly into the study of healing magic while at the Conservatory of Sorcery. (Also, having a General as Tritonis's emissary to Poseidonis seems a bit counter-effective to me. Why send a General from their military when it would make more sense to send someone who should ideally have better negotiating skills than what would likely be presumed of a General?) But as a healer? A magic user whose emphasis is in healing and who might have gained the knowledge of how to track and contain things like pandemics and other public health crises in Atlantis? She could easily have all the authority of a General, but on a broader scale than just Tritonis or Poseidonis, she could be a key public health advisor for all of Atlantis, and she has the connections to pave her way to that position. (Plus, Lori getting to have moments of being the quintessential snarly 'white mage' amuses me to no end.)

Garth: He can stay as the Atlantean Minister of Diplomacy and the UN Ambassador for Atlantis. Neither of those ties him explicitly to only one city-state of Atlantis, and he has the personal and political ties for it to make sense for how he eventually wound up in the position. Though with his being the protégé/apprentice to Arthur/Orin, I'm sure he would occasionally get met with accusations of prioritizing Poseidonis over the other city-states, but that just adds another layer (like Coral) that makes him having the position interesting. Plus, his experience from being on the surface gives him an edge of familiarity that would serve him well as the UN Ambassador. (And with my own headcanons and fics, he's got plenty of practice in diplomatically talking around things he'd rather avoid getting into, which is a skill I'm sure he'd use if he has it at his disposal.)

Beluga: I'm not opposed to Beluga having become the equivalent of a bishop or cleric, but the episodes he was in had him come across as a joke-- a bottom-of-the-barrel pick for a representative for Xebel. And while yeah, having a bottom-of-the-barrel pick was an easy way to show Mera's father snubbing Orin and that whole council and has its own narrative merits, at the same time it's just... SIGH. It also doesn't help that there's barely anything to his character shown in the series. And that's not even getting into the conflicting implication that in season 1 (his first appearance) Xebel was either largely unknown of in Atlantis proper, or that it wasn't technically considered part of Atlantis for a while (up until at least the end of season 1 at the earliest)-- which would mean that if he was originally from Xebel that his chances of attending the Conservatory would probably have been really limited. On the other hand, Beluga as a privileged son of some official who went into the Conservatory and eventually became a cleric and decided to take his practice to Xebel? That I can buy. (And in that context, Nereus pushing Beluga into the position of a politician when he's uncomfortable with it because it's seriously out of his wheelhouse while also leaning on his background as the son of some official for why he's the 'appropriate choice', sounds like an appropriately dick-ish move for Nereus without making Beluga an outright joke.)

Ronal: I'll admit, I do not like the idea of him being a 'lord' of Crastinus. Yes, he practically screams 'I am the son of someone with a LOT of political power', but putting him on the same level of royal families like Orin, Mera, Nereus, and Sha'ark just feels off-base and loads of 'ick' to me. (I personally headcanon him as the son of the Consul Magistrate of Poseidonis, putting his mother as one of the most politically powerful people in Atlantis right below the various royal families, but that's me.) I can buy him getting a political position due to the precedent set by his parent(s), however, due to his past history as a known purist I suspect his position would be precarious as hell. Making him an emissary would be a political landmine that I think most of the Atlantean city-states wouldn't want to risk. Taking up a position as a consul or a praetor though (since I doubt he'd be accepted as a consul magistrate due to being a political landmine)? That I can easily see happening. He'd have a political position due to his family background and training, but having been a known purist should have cost him access to higher levels of political power.

[calumaai]

Queer Ecologist Fieldwork

Approach and Methodology 

I chose early on to build a methodology to allow for lived, tacit and experiential knowledge to shape this research. Aiming to explore subjugated knowing, bringing lesser regarded streams of knowledge and being into the academy through participation and precipitation. My definitions come from responses to memes and memories, as much as theory and academia. Engaging a range of pedagogic, psychoanalytic and Queer practises and theoretical frameworks, I set out to explore processes of being and becoming across digital networks without oppressing these uncharted realities with a taxonomic approach. To design and iterate fieldwork in a fringe, often invisible location such a digital networks, participants had to be engaged as practitioners, invited into the frameworks of the research with me to uncover the full meaning of their fugitive practices which they are often, at least partially, unaware of. The introduction of meta-geographical practises into the fieldwork allowed us to tease out the participants navigational practises through the process of mapping and diagrammatization, which within itself locates the mapper’s place of subjectivity within digital networks. By asking participants to create Cartoids of their digital space, I was able to get them to create and share, in a material sense, something that before was rendered invisible due to a lack of language and the oppression of reflective material.  

Casestudies:

Fecal Mater 

Fashion design duo Fecal Matter (@matieresfecales) Hannah & Steven are Canadian Queer creatives who’s practise utilises their image and social presentation as a vessel for “provocation and transformation” of the capitalist constructs of identity. Meeting in fashion school, the pair were buoyed by their partnership take their practise further than they had dared to on their own, taking to digital social networks to share their bourgeoning visual language in opposition to the platforms ‘hetero-normative values” and celebration of “the icons of looking normal” such as “Kylie Jenner & Ariana Grande”. The configuration of digital networks at that time (2013) offered refuge from the known violence and rejection of the atomic world with its systemic silencing and violence against Queer expression and othered identities.

Outwardly, their practise (which they explain as living their truth and expressing their soul without compromising their freedom of expression) allows their audience, both atomic and digital, an opportunity to momentarily grasp the oppressive systems most are unaware they are engaged with. “You see people like us… your curious and that hopefully develops this critical thought process… and shines a light on the values systems that are very hard to identify.” Thus, the Fecal Matter’s aesthetic becomes a well refined tool to uncovering systemic injustice and alerting a viewer to their own prejudices and internalised oppressive capacities which we are often unaware or unwilling to engage with. This tool has been primarily iterated online, and then practised atomically, with the duo often photoshopping images to push their digital selves into forms not classically conceived of as human. Yet what these digital images and selves express is at the core of their human self-expression. “We are living our truth through an app… If I have to limit that part of my self, my expression, I actually don't feel alive anymore … its part of survival … If I cant do it, I’d rather die, I'd rather not exist.”

The duo’s image and physicality explores a new orientation of digital selfhood which does not subject the digital to physical limitations and rather expands atomic potential with digital realities. Their practice, urgent in its messaging, does away with conventional artist tools and mediums to explore the social image as communicative material, often rendered though digitally intervened imagery. However, in refusing the role of performance artists “Were not performance artists, this is who we are and [that’s] a big part of what we put out there” they reveal the performance of humanity itself, and its reality as a spectator sport.

Hannah and Steven’s emerging ecological practice disrupts the conventional boundaries between the digital and physical, while also subverting the power dynamics of performer and spectator. This interpenetration between digitality and physicality uncovers innovative ways in which Queer ecologists navigate digital networks to expose and escape oppressive identity structures. Through their approach, they critique the colonial constructs at the core of these identities and challenge society’s complicit enforcement of these norms.

Sarah Nicole Francois 

Haitian-American artist Sarah Nicole Francois (@sarahnicolefrancois) remembers “as a child, being a sponge of the world… hearing all these views about what a woman or black woman should think or feel or act or want.” These restrictive views and presuppositions of Sarah-Nicole’s selfhood lead them to explore digitality as a way “to dismantle those walls that i built” that “do[n’t] serve me anymore” to “traverse into [a] more ethereal side” of existence. 

This rejection of colonially-mandated identity saw Sarah-Nicole question the friction between their atomic and digital selves. “I didn't really like being face forward on the internet [and] started to think about the person that I am and the person that I'm being perceived as… How can I communicate that in a way that feels more authentic to me?” The creation of Sarah-Nicoles digital avatar allowed them to navigate the network in a new iteration of themselves, one not bound to their atomic physicalities, but as an expression of  their emotional and spiritual self. “There are things that I feel I should be more comfortable with in the physical world that I am not. So I use my avatar to emote all [those] things that i can't do… Its therapeutic”

Sarah’s avatar, rendered digitally and then exported in images, becomes visible on digital network’s, bearing the labour of oppressive systems of selfhood, to allow Sarah’s atomic self new space to navigate the world freely. This relationship allows the labour of identity to be refused, subverted and outsourced to a new agent, creating frictions in the everyday perception of self that most users hold.  

UGLYWORLDWIDE

Queer model and musician Jazzelle (@uglyworldwide) has created a large following using their image as a tool to expand concepts of beauty in the fashion and music industries. “Ive grown up poverty ridden, Queer and Black my whole life… What I do is a political movement within itself.” “Early on I really changed a lot of the beauty standards… My instagram handle is UGLYWORLDWIDE yet somehow we made it in the beauty industry!” Their acceptance into the upper echelons of the modelling industries marked a turn towards a more ‘inclusive’ era within the creative industries where individuality was encouraged in replacement of the blank canvas concept of the model in the 2000’s and early 2010s. This move was also often seen as the sublimation of internet practices into capitalist markets, further turning individuality and identity into a commodity to be valued and traded. 

Jazzelle is aware of the difficulties of navigating digital networks as a Queer person, often remarking on the expectations and projections other users assert on them. They say they have received tens of thousands of comments and violent death threat left publicly under the images they share or in their Direct Messages. “I want to curb stomp this person” is one they remember well. “As Queer people the internet brings you up then rips you right back down again. Its the up and down that generated the most amount of engagement. [The platforms] get the same amount of money whether its someone commenting I'm going to kill you or I love you” 

This has an detrimental impact on Jazzelle’s creative output and mental health. “It's very toxic for people to have to deal with the violent ups and downs. It's really psychotic [and] overwhelming [it] can be stifling even to my own creative process and [self expression]”. They express how their sometimes feels like an expectation, or “contract” with the audience, which allows both other users and coperate brands to engage inappropriately, eventually feeling “I wasn’t  [being] celebrated… it felt like being in a window at the zoo, i wasn’t being embraced but i was being used as a marketing tool for a new type of audience” 

Figure 1 shows Jazzelle’s Cartoid of their digital space, in which their physicality is alternated, features exaggerated with one of their signature atomic make up looks transposed on their avatar. Their squared features are sharp compared to the faceless, gawking eyes that surround them, omnipresent in the scene. To further add to the unequal dynamic between the audience and Jazzelle in this image, their instagram handle is stamped on their head, affording them no chances at anonymity, whilst the crowd stand unnamed. Also, rather comically, their digital counterpart smokes a cigarette, as if to warn the prying audience that they are not a good role model. 

This diagram maps Jazzelle’s navigational approach to their digital network, and speculates on their experience of digitality. Out of all the participants, Jazzelle has had the most commercial success from their Queer fugitive practises online, intersecting normative culture whilst amassing a large network. This large, connected existence is very present within the map, showing the psychosocial impacts of their networked experience in a zoo-like image, diagramming a liberated digital entity, navigating alone. 

RAFIK GREISS

Rafik Greiss (@rafikgreiss) is a photographer and artist who’s artistic practise engages looks to elevate the banal and ubiquitous through imagery and installations, challenging the viewer’s often subconscious value systems. Their practise also seeks to explore the fissures that appear between Western and Eastern constructions of time through entropic thinking and synthesis. They do not have a large public digital network, with their accounts being private and only hosting one image. However, they have been using a more limited network (Instagram’s ‘Close Friends’ feature) to share updates of the violent slaughter and humanitarian needs of Palestinians in Gaza since the October 7th 2023 terrorist attacks on Isreal and Israel’s subsequent genocide of the Palestinian people. 

In our discussion, they expressed how they feared the design of social networks could create a short circuited feedback loop where the creation of their art became about the feedback and value the network allowed it. Rafik noted the scale of the network, which they referred to as “architecture” and its impact on their consciousness “sometimes I try to think of a tree and I think of an image of a tree instead… you're almost perceiving it through a screen”.

This fear, and lack of engagement is present in the Cartoid Rafik drew, which shows an image of their desktop computer, with taxonomised files displayed on the screen. We also see the rounded edge of Rafik’s table to ensure we are situated purely in the atomic world. For Rafik, digital space is merely where their documents are. The relationship between the objects and the viewer is simple and not requiring of much thought or reflection. The Cartoid’s lack of navigational context can be read as Rafik being unengaged within their navigational agency due to fear of the impact of the digital on their practise, which they voiced in their interview. Their map implies an oppression of Rafik’s navigational agency, instead drawing on old frames of reference for the digital simply as a tool for completing tasks, filled with coperate skumorphisms, rather than a bountiful digital ecology. 

REMEMBER  

REMEMBER (@rememberyouweremadetobeused) is a visual practise that began in 2014 with the publication of printed artefact REMEMBER YOU WERE MADE TO BE USED, alongside an instagram profile with the same name. The decision by the artist to use a pseudonym rather than their name was pragmatic in its desire for fugitivity. Their research into how the internet was becoming a virtual uniform, allowing users to form identities and attach themselves to past and future subcultures without physical engagement was a core concept for REMEMBER at the outset, hence wanting to remain anonymous to better engage in the potentials of digital anonymity within image-making. However, personally they were “hugely conscious… if you google [my name] you get some weird image on twitter of me.” Their anonymity allows for REMEMBER’s images to be networked without assertions of a gendered gaze, instead inviting the audience to project and reflect upon the politics of their sight and the baggage which they arrive at the image with. 

Ownership of images, often denoted by the momentum by which these networked images traverse our digital networks is a core principal of REMEMBERS practise, informing their desire to physically and digitally age and degrade visuals, bringing an nostalgic, artifactual aesthetic to a caricatured clinical digital world. They relate our modern state of networked interconnectedness with the practise of image making Warhol set out in the 70’s, fascinated by the idea of publication and replication of the image as a process of becoming, masked as spectacle 

REMEMBER’s simply executed Cartoid shows 2 forms, one angled, enclosed and preordained and another organic path. Both lead to or originate from the centre, expanding and contracting. The image visualises new methodologies for way finding within the network, and can be interpreted as a simple representation of the Queer digital experience once liberated from the restrictions of the network, navigating new ecologies without navigational limitations.

MICHAELA STARK 

Queer Couturier and artist Michaela Stark (@michaelastark) uses a combination of lingerie, imagery and social networks to research and iterate a practise of ‘Body-morphing’, seeing them bind and decorate their body into new forms, borrowing from art-historical and fashion cannons to create images to be shared online and through publications. This artistic practise is commercialised through their lingerie studio and brand Panty. The aim and desire of body morphing is a rejection of the sexualisation of the body. “I realised it was about wanting to embrace that child likeness [when] you have complete agency over you body… and it wasn't sexualised at all” 

The body morphing practise is one that engages with both digital and atomic publics, either when shared via networked images that Michaela takes of themselves, or when Michaela’s wears of their pieces to events and parties. When they are dressed in a full look (sometimes but not always referred to as their drag) they are aware they must navigate public space differently. “I can't get on the train… I've been sexually assaulted in the past just by going [on a night out in my drag] to [Dalston] Superstore.” This violent loss of bodily autonomy and agency is mirrored with how Michaela and their images navigate digital networks when sharing the practise of body morphing, due to censorship rules around platforms, as well as trolling. “My mom tried to report this [troll] that kept threatening to rape me but Instagram said his comments were fine but would remove my post because my posts were provoking that attitude.” Michaela’s experience of sexual violence and threats of such violence are present in both atomic and digital navigation when in their drag. Yet, rather than allow for the threats to force them into relinquishing their agency for safety, they express how digital platforms commit further violence in their algorithmic censorship and deplatforming. 

“Getting told that my body looks disgusting… from a stranger doesn't affect me nearly a much as the threat of having my voice taken down because of it.” Michaela expresses this duality of freedom and algorithmic censorship in their Cartoid too, showing the facets and  decisions that make up their navigational choices when posting an image. Michaela has had their account deactivated awaiting review 5 times in 2 years, giving them a clearer idea of how and where Instagram enforces its rules on its networks. “You can hide your nipples if your fingers are straight but squeezing your boobs makes it a sexual act” allowing for the navigational privileging of less curvaceous bodies upon Instagram networks. “Our work was being taken off for sexual solicitation… [because Instagram rules that] if your deemed sexual in a picture and tag someone in that post, that's sexual solicitation so you can be removed.” Michaela's front line knowledge of Instagrams practises and location of enforcement highlights how different images, and the identities they contain are held to different values systems which in turn limits their ability to navigate or even exist upon the network. However, when Michaela’s work is seen, its creates a friction in the audience that allows for non-normative beauty and it’s fugitive values to take hold. “Ive gotten a lot of comments over the years.. ‘The first time I saw your work I hated it so much and reported it’… since them they've come back to look at it over and over again  and realised they love it, and it was the inner work they had to do on themselves”

Michaela speaks throughout the interview and through their carotid of how their practise of Bodymorphing limits the navigational agency of their body both atomically and digitally. Their Cartoid shows the considerations that inform their navigational choices, both positive and negative. The Cartoid shows a lack of order to the scene, with audiences, thoughts, images and concepts layered over one another, becoming a visual cacophony, ultimately visualised as a black hole. Michaela's ability to share the multitudinal approach to selfhood and the life giving power of the digital through ecological expressions of self is present throughout the conversation and their map. However users are limited in how they can engage with the expansionary, open source selfhood Michaela exemplifies, limited by platform’s normative values and censorship which halt peer-to-peer dialogues across the network, becoming lost in the ‘blackhole’. 

[prettybiching]

Okay. Okay.

*deep breaths*

Girl (gn), the gasp I just let out terrified the ghosts in my room.

First and foremost, I love love loveeeee her scenes with the Cargyll brothers always. The way we always see her as *herself*, beyond her ailment, beyond her concerns of putting up an act, both as a Hightower daughter and/or a Targaryen wife. She's just herself, without being worried that she's disappointing Otto or Daemon.

And the way she's so playful with Erryk 😭😭 it made me sob because it was probably the first time in a long time that she was able to be that happy and cheerful, pulling pranks on a friend that sees her for who she is! (I don't even want to think about the fact that the last time she experienced something like this was probably in old town w gwayne when they were children)

I love the way you portray Otto's relationship with the reader because he's not black and white with his motives, only using his daughter to raise his House's standing. Rather, he's a complex character with layers, he's still a father - albeit a shitty one at that.

He loves his daughter, in his own twisted way. How he ensures that she's not having a fit before dropping the baby bomb on her. He worries for her, knows her ticks. But it's the way he uses his love and knowledge regarding her to get his own way and to get the reaction he wants out of her that's the most twisted.

Also, I love how we're seeing mc slowly but surely starting to stand up for herself. WE LOVE GROWTH IM SO PROUD OF HER, I COULD CRY.

Day 173822 of begging daemon to just be normal for once in his life.

Honestly speaking, I was one of the few that voted for reader to prioritise herself and not go after either gwayne or daemon but ohh!!! I loved loved loved this scene.

Her realising that she's going to have to get used to not having gwayne at every turn and stopping herself. Ugh, my heart hurts.

ALSO DAEMON YOU LITTLE RAT, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT BEING MAD AT MY GIRL FOR NOT BEING THERE WHEN YOU DEGRADED HER THE LAST TIME AND NOT IN THE SEXY WAY!!!!

Her telling him to speak what he wants and not twist his words is soooo real. YES GIRLL SET IT STRAIGHT WE DONT WANT EXTRA HEADACHES IN OUR LIVES!!

I just remembered that she still thinks that night was a dream and I'm heartbroken again </3

Pls daemon why do you have to choose aggression and rage every fucking time. Just be cute for once ugghhh.

"Please," you beg, though you knew it would not serve you well, "stay."

prettybiching.exe has stopped responding. Please try again later.

Nahhh I can't do this fam, good bye. I'm going to touch some grass.

Good night. Au revoir. Author, I love you. Thank you for blessing me with your brain and words. Please never stop <3

(ps I'd love to be added to the taglist, please and thanks!)

Tormented Spirit | 7

Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

"Is it such a sin to stand up for yourself?" you mutter as tears blur your vision. The way he reacted was visceral, instinctive even. "You never have to stand up for yourself ever again," says Daemon, reaching a hand to you, "come."

Daemon Targaryen x Hightower!Reader | 5k+ | cw: fem!reader, reader has brown hair, wife!reader, twin!Gwayne, arranged/forced marriage, canon divergence, alternate universe, slow burn, smut (cunnilingus, piv, choking, degradation, slight sadism), DD:DNE, panic/anxiety attacks, daddy issues/child abuse/family problems, mentions/depictions of mental/physical/psychosomatic illness, ye old misogyny, angst, typos, etc.

A/N: again the high valyrian is internet translated so lol. please consider leaving comments/reblogs because they really help me with the fic. might make another poll for next chapter stay tuned. | cross posted on ao3

@arabellasleopardcoat

Taking you to the hidden stream was simultaneously the best and worst decision Erryk's ever made in his life. The look of you was holy. His intense focus on your form was to ensure your safety, but, by the gods, it felt sinful to behold your dark hair and light fabric ebbing in the water.

He had hoped a swim would lift your spirits, just as flower picking did, but he did not know it would draw such a tempest out of you. It was as though you were reborn. You plunged into the water and shed all your inhibitions. Your voice became brighter, as did your eyes. You were flooded with more than a dozen memories of you and your twin swimming in the river near your home in Oldtown, and you recounted all of them so excitedly to Erryk.

"Oh!' you exclaim, flipping in the water to get to your feet. You point to something behind your ward, making him turn around. In that split second, you hold in your laughter and grab something from the mossy rocks. Innocently, you say, "that reminds me of something."

Erryk turns back to you, brows knit in confusion. When you you make your way towards him, he clenches his jaw and averts his gaze. The shift you were swimming in was stuck flush on your body, leaving little to his imagination. He was glad to have the foresight to bring you a change of clothes and a towel, and, my, was the pattern on the said towel so very interesting.

"What is a frogs favorite game?" you ask so suddenly.

Erryk turns to you, brows furrowing, "pardon?"

"Tell me the frogs' favorite game, ser," you repeat as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Frogs favored game?" he repeats slowly, realizing now that your expression was mockingly innocent. He hums, "I cannot say I-"

"HOPSCOTCH!"

A frog comes leaping into Erryk's face, nearly causing him to topple as he dodges it. He's so flabbergasted by the turn of events, he calls out your name in offence. He is doubly offended by your laughter. His eyes go wide as you hunch forward, leaning on your knees.

"Villain," your ward mutters, scoffing far too many times.

You can barely catch your breath. You fan your face, "frog-ive me."

Erryk's face only contorts further.

"I could not-" you gasp for air, "could not help it."

In truth, if it was any other who did such a childish thing, he'd have shoved them in the water. Alas, you appeared only more beauteous as you made him a fool.

"Forgive me," you repeat in more serious manner, "Gwayne used to scare me this way often. I wished only to know how it felt, and now..." you giggle, "I can't say I blame my brother for constantly pulling tricks on me."

He huffs and shakes his head, "well. I'm glad to have pleased you, my ever-so-kind princess."

You offer him a guilty smile, "apologies."

Erryk shakes his head, "no. Truly. I am glad to see you in such a state."

You fidget with your fingers as a shiver runs down your spine.

He is quick to unravel your towel. He places it on your shoulders, "perhaps we should go back. The sunset is nigh."

You nod, taking your change of clothes from him next.

He turns around offering you your privacy. It takes a while, but you manage to dress yourself. Once you had your shoes on, you dry your hair with your towel and take his arm, "would you please lace up my dress?"

He nods, avoiding your gaze as he feels his face burn. He quickly laces you up then you return to the Keep.

You both had been laughing, up until you made it past the castle gates, promptly being silenced by the loud shout, "PRINCESS!"

Arryk runs over, charging for his brother. Their steel plates collide as Arryk yanks his twin, "where in gods name did you take her?"

Erryk furrows his brows, "we visited a stream-"

"The Keep is in disarray!" Arryk grits his teeth, hissing under his breath, "everyone's looking for her. Everyone."

You watch the twins huddle close and bicker. As it escalates, you try try to come between them, "Arryk. I was the one who asked him to take me outside the keep."

Arryk does not hear you at first, dead set on arguing with his twin. When you repeat your words the second time however, he turns to you, face softening a fraction. He knits his brows turning back to this brother, whispering something that makes Erryk turn to you with wide eyes, "fuck."

"Why?" you look at them in concern, "what it is?"

Arryk opens his mouth, but Erryk grabs his arm and says, "wait."

"There's no other way to say it," Arryk snaps, ripping his arm out his grip.

"Say what?" you knit your brows.

Arryk turns back to you, then lowers his gaze, "the queen... the queen has passed."

Your jaw drops. Your eyes widen. Your hand immediately covers your mouth. The three of you do not speak for a prolonged moment.

You feel your stomach roll, "w-what happened?"

"She could not deliver the babe herself. The maesters... had to intervene."

Intervene? You could not possibly understand what that could mean, and you find that you do not want to. You shake your head, "and her babe? Is- is her babe well at least?"

Arryk clenches his jaw, "she sired a prince named Baelon... he apparently grows weaker by the hour."

You feel bile rise up your throat.

"Your father and your siblings have been looking for you since news broke."

You shake your head, and gather your skirts.

"As has the prince."

Your face twitches at the thought. You do not delay and make your way inside the Keep.

As you tread the halls, you think about what the queen told you just mere hours ago. There is a sharp twinge in your belly as simultaneously remember how Aemma told you to go cheer for Daemon at the tourney and realize you will never hear a word from her ever again. The thought washes over you like water on the beach, sobering but thankfully not overwhelming.

You hadn't realized you had your head bowed until you hear your name called. You still as you look up, the twins halt behind you.

Otto marches over, brows and jaw tight as ever, "where in gods name have you been?"

You straighten your back as he stops before you, "I-"

"Your wards are double," he turns to the kingsguards, "and doubly useless, it seems."

"Father," you step into his line of sight, "do relieve your rage on them."

Your father turns back to you, expression softening a fraction at your referral. You had not called him father since your argument in the maester's office. He looks at you— takes a good look at you and your sad eyes, your knit brows, your frowning lips. Your hair was darker than it was normally, and as he reaches out for it, he found it was, in fact, damp, "where have you been?"

"I..." you gulp and take a deep breath, "went swimming."

He releases your hair, tilting his head, "with whom? Gwayne has gone."

You pull your head back, "G-Gwayne's gone?"

"The tourney is over. The road is long. He has no reason to stay," Otto says.

Your brows tighten as you shake your head, "he... he didn't... wait for me?"

Otto watches your lips quiver. He watches your nose twitch. When your chest begins to visibly rise and fall, he shakes his head, "what did I tell you?"

You stare blankly at him.

He takes your hands, "what is it I always tell you?"

You clench your jaw and huff through your nostrils, "do not waste your tears on things you cannot change."

Otto rubs your knuckles as he shakes his head again. He gives the Cargyll brothers a look before walking off with you. They make sure to keep their distance before following after.

You turn to your father as he links your arm into his. You are certain, with how he cannot look at you, that he means to tell you something grave. You look front and mimic his demeanor— distant, cold. You are his daughter, face and temperance.

"You enjoyed your swim at least?" he starts, "you are calm?"

You gulp, mentally preparing yourself for what will surely come next. Your voice still falters though, "ye-s."

Otto nods, still not turning to you, "many has occurred since your marriage to Daemon. You admitted you did not consummate your marriage on your wedding night and I was deeply concerned you would fail your duties in producing heirs, especially if your husband was not interested in you."

Your jaw clenches.

"But with the apparent... change of heart your husband has shown, you should know I've had the maesters closely monitor your state."

You knit your brows at that, "you mean my affliction?"

He speaks your name slowly before continuing, "as of yesterday, they have confirmed to me that you are with child."

You whip your head to him and pull away.

Otto does not look at you with the same sense of urgency.

"W-what?"

He sees the fear on your features. He offers a solemn expression and takes your cheeks when your eyes water, "this is good. You should delight, not tremble."

You try to speak but nothing coherent comes out.

"The Queen is dead. Go to your husband and comfort him with this news."

Your mouth goes dry and your father wipes the tears that fall from your eyes. He your name softly. Your sad face looks the exact same it did when his wife died. My baby is having a baby. He frowns and pulls away.

You try to take his hand, but he slips away.

"See her off," the Hand instructs your wards.

Erryk is quick to go to your side, whereas Arryk stares at the back of Otto's head, his lips curling as he did.

"Princess," Erryk says, cautiously reaching your arm.

You turn to him with wide eyes before scratching your tears away, "I-"

"Perhaps you should sit down first."

You pull away from him before he can touch you. The action makes Erryk pull back, an unsavory sensation spreading in his mouth and belly.

"I want to- I—" you take a breath, "I need to find-" you shake your head and begin speeding down the hall.

You were nearly about to break into a sprint, and your wards had to jog up to your side to keep up with you. You don't really know where you're going, but you're getting there, fast.

"Princess, please, slow down," one says.

You can feel your breath and your pulse in your ears.

"Princess."

You find yourself in the halls near one of the gate of the keep. The only reason why you stop is because you hear the voice of your twin. Your breath catches as you lurch towards the window. Gwayne was laughing with one of the guards, already on his horse. Your brows furrow, he couldn't possibly be well enough to be riding on horseback.

You realize quickly this is your last opportunity to go be with your brother, to pull him into an embrace, to worry on him, to tell him your worries, to kiss him goodbye. You know you have to act now and swiftly, but you cannot seem to move.

Your mind is heavy as you think about how your brother is set to leave regardless of your desire to keep close; he said it himself, his place can never be at your side. Though he is the only person who've ever relied on, you know now— you rub your belly, that can no longer be the case. There is only one person you can rely on now... yourself.

It is painful to pull away from the window, but you do, clenching your hands into fists before walking away.

You don't really walk away however, because then, you're frozen in place at the sight of your husband standing a few paces away from you, "Daemon."

He stares at you wordlessly.

You walk towards him, careful as you drag your feet.

He tilts his head and clenches his jaw, "he's leaving any moment now."

You nod, "I know."

"Go to him," he says softly.

"I-"

"Go to him!" he snaps.

You stiffen at his expression. You were adept with anger but he did not look angry. You stop in your tracks, trying to make sense of his restless figure.

Daemon watches you fidget with your fingers.

"If it is your command, I shall obey."

He chuckles dryly, pacing around his spot. He wipes his mouth then charges over, stopping just in front of you. He scoffs when you do not flinch, in disbelief of your constitution. His nostrils flare, "you know my feelings towards your twin."

You slowly shrug, "then you'll be glad to know I came looking for you."

Daemon does not move.

"You know how I feel about my brother..." you mutter, "but..." you lower your gaze, "I'm coming to terms with the fact I can no longer rely on him... it will be better this way."

It takes a moment, but Daemon chuckles. When you look up and his smirk fades. Your beady eyes make it hard to find satisfaction. "So, you will not go to him?" he asks.

You stare.

"You do not want to go to him?"

Your lips part.

He raises his brows.

"I... I do."

Anger rises up his belly, but as if on cue, the sound of horses and carriages moving is heard. You clench your jaw and lower you gaze to prevent yourself from looking back at the window. The prince cannot seem to win, for he should be pleased you did not see your brother off, and yet your sadness leaves sour jealousy in his mouth— he was your husband.

The Cargyll twins look upon you both, appalled by the cruelty of the prince to keep you here as Gwayne leaves for good. Erryk in particular feels restless, unable to stop shifting and fidgeting with his scabbard.

"Shall... shall we go?" you mutter, slowly looking up.

Daemon watches you place a hand on his bicep. He responds only by following you after giving your wards a dismissive look.

The brothers turn to each other, each as unwilling as the other to leave you, but they do anyway.

Daemon is acutely aware of the warmth of your cheek against his arm as you tread down the halls. When, you arrive at your marriage chambers, Daemon opens the door and you notice the bandage wrapped around his hand. He struggles because of this. Once you're inside, you take his arm, eyes trained on his injury, "what happened to your hand?"

Daemon's eyes are fixed on the line between your brows.

"Did you break it?" you turn to him with furrowed eyes.

He pulls away slowly. He wants to know what you'd do next.

"Did you wrap it yourself? It's badly done."

He faintly snorts, "it's on my right hand."

"I'll do it for you," you say, walking towards the vanity.

Daemon follows, watching you procure scissors and vials and other things. You turn to him, motioning to the chair. He sits down, gaze fixed upon you as you take his arm again.

Your eyes are focused on undoing his wrap, "tell me if it hurts,"

His are fixed on your focused expression, "you should sit down."

"I'm fine."

"I want you to sit down," he uses his other hand to grab your wrist.

You stop and turn to him. You turn to the chair across the room but Daemon prevents you from doing so and simply spreads legs, pulling you between his thighs. Quickly, you are sat on his lap and tense look at him. He offers you his injured hand again as his other goes around you, clinging to your hip. He pulls you in, leaning his head against yours to say, "it's a cut, by the way."

You furrow your brows at his admission. You allow yourself a moment to relax before continuing your task. You find it is, in fact, a cut, deep and ugly, "did your lance splinter very badly?"

"No."

You furrow your brows deeper as you turn to him,

"This is glass."

"Glass?" you brow raise, "how did you hurt your hand with glass?"

Daemon licks his lips as he looks at yours. He shrugs, "I broke a bottle."

You pull your head back, "on accident?"

"On purpose," he tilts his head.

You huff and start cleaning his wound, "was the violence in the tourney insufficient?"

He chuckles through his nostrils, "I did not fucking win."

You smear balm on his wound. You do not reply.

It makes him clench his jaw, "and you..."

"..."

"You were not there."

You do not tear your gaze from his injury.

He grumbles, "did you even hear me?"

You lift your gaze then raise brow at him, "you did not want me there. Do you not recall how you cursed at me?"

Your gall makes anger rise up his throat.

You continue wrapping up his hand.

"Well, you were being a bitch," he snaps.

"Why?"

His brows furrow.

"Why was I being a bitch?"

"..."

You spare him a quick glace.

He pulls his head back, "... what?"

"Did I not do my duty?" you turn to him, face blank, "I followed you, congratulated you, inquired of your injuries. I submitted to your desires. Where did I err?" You ask in earnest, "what do you want from me?"

His face contorts. Now that he was faced with such an opportunity, he finds himself unable to speak. What did he want from you?

You wait for him to reply. You prepare yourself for preposterous requirements but you are met only his silence. In that moment, you remember he was just a man. Many a man enjoyed making women suffer. You gulp, thinking about your father.

Perhaps your father was lying. Perhaps he wants you to believe you are with child to get even. After all, Daemon never... finished in you. How then could you be with child?

You secure the binding on his hand, "it is finished."

Daemon does not bother looking at his hand.

"How do you feel?"

He feels a strong urge to shake you... to pull you close.

"My deepest sympathies for the death of your cousin."

He freezes. Right. The queen was dead. He lowers his gaze.

You frown and reach for his cheek. You second guess however and bring your palm to his shoulder instead, "I am here for you, my prince."

His eyes meet yours.

"I am here to care and comfort you."

He leans back, taken by the thought.

You drink in his demeanor, the softness in his eyes, the tension that falls of his shoulders. You release a breath, "if that is what you desire, speak plainly, and do not repel me. Do not ask me to leave if, in fact, you want me to stay."

His throat tightens. He feels like he is ensnared in a bear trap. He rips at his collar, "I... I have other injuries." He pushes you off and paces around as he undoes his top. It is a struggle for him, but he cannot stop or stay still, "cuts and bruises."

You watch as he fidgets and slowly walk over.

"I don't-"

"Daemon."

He stills.

You come in front of him and undo his top yourself. You drop it mindlessly, and once he is bare, he feels conscious under your scrutiny for some reason. You brush your fingers on his ribs, making goosebumps form on his skin. He can't say that that has ever happened to him before. You notice and rub his arms, eyes locked on his torso.

He feels himself getting hard.

"Did you tend to these yourself as well?" you brush over a cut on his hip.

Oh. You were still examining him. He only hums in response.

You frown, "did no maester come to your tent?"

"I..." he starts.

You circle around him, inspecting for other injuries.

"...wanted you to come to my tent."

You come to his side. He finds the frown on your face. You take a moment before saying, "you tended to your wounds well at least."

"I want you."

You nod, "I will tend to you—"

Daemon takes your nape, lowering his head to kiss your lips. It takes a moment for you to relax, and his belly burns at the sound you make when you do. Your hands come to his sides and your nails graze faintly into his flesh.

He pushes you back until your laid on the bed beneath him. His kisses trail down your skin as he works to get you naked. He kisses your shoulder, then your sternum. He makes sure to lick your breast and leave a mark on your rib before peppering kisses down your belly.

Your breath grows heavy when he lingers by your womb, sucking kisses on your skin. Your throat tightens think of your father's words again. It makes you tense, and Daemon feels it. Of course, he doesn't know about your conversation with Otto, and thinks your tension comes from your self-consciousness.

You lift your head, pulling a pillow beneath it, and look down at your husband. You reach for him, tangling your fingers in his silver hair, "Daemon."

He hums, nipping your flesh in response.

You try to sit up, "D-Daemon, I-"

He shushes you, pushing down on your hip bone. He looks up at you, muttering something in High Valyrian.

"Please, Daemon, wait-"

"Be still," he says, violet eyes hooded, "do I not take care of you?"

Your breath hitches as he sinks down.

"Do you not enjoy my mouth?"

"I- that's not-"

"Do you or do you not?"

"I... I do—"

You are not able to speak after he buries his face between your thighs. You are reduced to breathy cries and a twisting spine. Daemon, though he continues to hold you down, relishes every second of it and feasts more ardently. He sighs, securing your thighs on his shoulders, nudging his face deeper into you, his nose brushing against your pearl.

He relishes how quickly your wetness builds, and soon, he feels your arousal dribbling down his chin. He moans, nails biting crescent moons into your skin. Your belly rises and falls in sync with the crescendo of your mewls. At this point, both your hands are tangled into his hair, and your pulling and scratching only further inspires his tongue.

You call out his name, screwing your eyes shut as you throw your head back and arch your body. Quickly, your belly tightens and you sequentially dig your heels into his shoulder blades. He squeezes your thighs enough to make them bruise, and yet the pain is what pushes you into orgasm, garnering a lewd and loud sound from your mouth.

Daemon hums, lifting his face just enough to see yours as he brings you to peak. He moans at your expression, grinding his hips into the cushion, desperate for friction.

Your body trembles, unable to settle as his burning mouth persists on your molten mound. You begin to squeak and he catches the moment you open your eyes to look at him all teary. It drives him mad. With a deep inhale, he pulls away, wiping his chin before he undoes his breeches.

You relax and catch your breath, hands dropping to your sides.

Daemon watches you, your trembling legs glistening with the pleasure he's drawn out. He can feel himself throbbing in his pants. You watch as he hastily frees himself. Though your head was hazy and your body was tried, your belly burned at sight of the sticky liquid dripping down your husband's neck.

"Fuck, Daemon," you reach for his belly. You trace his defined muscles with your finger tips. He snatches your hands when he finally pushes his pants down.

You squeak when he pushes you to your side, one hand on your shoulder, another hiking your leg up by the knee. You whine as he folds you into the sheets just before sliding his hardened cock in your wet cunt.

He hisses, leaning down to your neck. His words are hot against your skin, but you understand nothing.

Whatever tenderness he had before was gone, now he was just fucking you like a rabid animal. Daemon could not help himself, he loved how supple and pliable you were, and twists you into a form that keeps you prone. When the bed begins to creak because of his thrusts, he holds you down where your neck and collarbone meet. He puts enough pressure to restrict your breathing, but not enough to choke out your pretty noises.

At some point, he decides your leg is getting in the way and pushes you flat on your chest. He then gathers you by the hip, hiking you up enough to fuck you nicely from behind.

His thrusts are more intense now. You scream into the cushion as you find your elbows. Before you can prop yourself up though, he's pinning you down by the shoulder, saying something in High Valyrian again.

"D-Daemon," you whine, left cheek smushed against your pillow. You could feel your next climax building quickly.

He responds by rubbing your clit, drawing tears and another scream out of you because of your sensitivity.

You feel yourself helplessly clenching and unclenching around him, absolutely boneless under his vigorous intrusion. You could feel your knees slipping but Daemon's grip on you would not see you move from your position. Your toes curl. Saliva drips out your open mouth.

"Māzigon va, riña," he snorts, "sepār mirrī angotan tolī." Come on, girl. Just a little bit more."

You do not understand, so you only whine out, "Daemon."

Daemon growls and rubs one side of your ass, "you're doing so good for me."

He spanks you, but that's not what makes your eyes open.

"Milk my cock with your tight cunny, come slut."

You begin to grit your teeth.

"I want to see my seed dripping down your thighs," he groans, mind unable to focus on anything but the hot, wet slapping of your skin.

It's unsurprising that you come first, as Daemon always assures you do to underscore his control and dominance over you. He yelps out a sharp fuck, nearly coming in your cunt because of how your body seizes up around him. Your orgasm overwhelming, yet your eyes water for more than this reason. His words make you aware your husband sees you nothing more as a vessel for pleasure, and your pleasure is regretfully cut short because of how sharply he pulls out, his load spraying on your already dripping labia and pubic hair.

He strokes himself a few times, feeling his cock twitch in his hand as he watches your mixed come trickle down your legs. He sighs, "fuck," then scoops the cream in two fingers, plunging it in and out your still spasming cunt.

You squeal when he finger fucks you, body unable to remain upright. You are grateful he loses interest rather quickly and crumble into the bed as he stands.

You watch him walk over to the drawer, where he then pours himself some wine. You gulp, remembering your dream from last night. It sobers you out your high. You clench your jaw and roll over to clean yourself up. You head to your vanity and wipe yourself down, grabbing your robe was you do.

Daemon, whose thirst was now quenched, turns back to you with a towel. He is confused to see you standing. He watches you flip your hair behind you, pulling it out of your robe, which you then secure around yourself. He knits his brows as he walks over, "what are you doing?"

You turn to him, sitting on the vanity chair, "getting ready for bed."

Daemon stares, and you take his prolonged silence as an indication to proceed with your nightly routine.

The prince squeezes the damp towel in his hand as he watches you brush your hair. You catch his stillness from the mirror and turn back to him, "oh."

You drop your brush and take the towel from him, "I'll help you clean up."

Normally, he enjoyed this, but right now, he can't. He is offended when you begin to pick up his clothes, so much that he scoffs, "the fuck are you doing?"

You halt midway picking up his trousers. You stand and turn to the closet, "ah. Did you want new clothes?"

He pulls his head back, no longer offended, but hurt, "you want me to leave?"

You are caught off guard by his question. You stare at him for a moment, unsure if he was serious. You could not identify his expression, so you did not know if you tell him the truth. You would not survive being berated after confessing you wanted to sleep with him. You dodge the answer altogether, "weren't you leaving anyway?"

Daemon's cheeks tense. He huffs, stepping forward, yanking his clothes out of your hands, "no."

You are bewildered by his actions, for to you, his actions are sudden. You are petrified in fear, which is why you instinctively begin to apologize, "f-forgive me, I-I-"

His nostrils flare and his jaw sets.

"I-" you motion with a hand, "- you always leave."

His clenches his jaw, "do you want me to leave?"

"I—" your throat tightens and soon you can no longer look at him. You want to beg him to stay, but you recall how you did that with your father, and your mother, and your brother— begging does not make people stay. You whisper, "I... I'm terrified."

When you lift your gaze, Daemon shirks and decided to dress. He gulps as he pulls his trousers up, turning back to you. He clenches his fist before reaching out for you.

Your heart races as he takes your hand.

"You've served me well. If you are terrified... I'll leave you."

You whimper when he pulls away, holding him tighter than he did before your hands part. Your lips quiver. He knits his brows. You shake your head, "I- I... I do not want you to go."

He is taken off guard by how you suddenly embrace him.

"Please," you beg, though you knew it would not serve you well, "stay."

He turned to stone. He cannot seem to move at all but your arms are determined to stay around him. You begin to weep against his skin and he can feel your breath grow ragged. Only then does he manage to return your affection.

He brushes your dark hair away from your face and cradles you against him.

"Daemon."

He leans into you, enough to be able to brush his cheek against yours, "kesan umbagon." I will stay.

You sniffle then sigh. After a while, you ask, "what does that mean?"

"I will stay."

You sigh again, pulling away to look at him. You offer him a sad smile, "thank you."

He frowns, wiping your tears.

When you go back to bed, you offer him space in case you've made him uncomfortable. He stares at you, awaiting your embrace. You are mere inches apart but it feels like yards and yards.

"Good night, husband," you say before turning over.

He chuckles dryly, staring at your dark hair. He turns to the ceiling, "good night."

[princepipper]

I really like your drawings of Pip and Gabe! (the Valentine's day one is so cute 🥹) If you're comfortable with sharing, I'd be interested in the relationship history between the two? I know Pip is your OC/self-insert and Gabe isn't, but I enjoyed the stories you have on AO3 and want to hear more.

(´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

I don't know who you are anon but I want you to know that someone taking interest in my ideas and OC, even if it's all based around my friend's character, is super touching and I'm flattered!

Buckle up, I'm gonna give you a rundown of what's already established regarding Pip n' Gabe, some backstory, and some future plans as well (without giving away TOO much as I will eventually be making more fanfics...)

So, in the little universe I've whipped up and placed these characters into, Pipper Hughes moves to Thornville when she is 8 years old, and lives with her mom in the house next door to Gabe and his family. Gabe is 10 at the time, just two years older, and even though he's pretty reserved as a kid, Pip manages to draw him in by interacting with him at school. The two are similar when it comes to interests, they like Pokemon and video games, drawing, etc... it's mentioned in my story "The Wheel of Life", but Gabe admits that even befriending him as a child was an impressive feat, and Pip was really his first friend.

My verse has some major differences from canon and mainly that is to do with the fact that I blended in One's main story with the uncomfortable!AU, making One and Gabe twin brothers. In canon, it's when they're about 11 that the accident with Matt, their little brother, happens. In my verse I tie this in and Matt tragically dies when struggling to escape from Gabe, who tied him to a tree. I haven't worked out much in terms of how this affects Pip's relationship with Gabe, but what I can tell you is that she knew him for barely a year before he began acting out so badly that he was hospitalized, her being left to wonder what happened to her next door friend.

I'd imagine that he would have to be kept in the hospital for a time, to sort out what was causing his episodes, and to treat it. In this universe Gabe causes Matt's death, and not too long afterwards he relapses and carves those eye-shaped scars on his arms and hands. It is at this time that his mom can't take it anymore and divorces his dad, leaving with One and creating the rather cold household dynamic that is Gabe and his father. So then, where does Pip fit into this stuff, how is she still able to remain a friend to Gabe?

The answer, simply put: she is stubborn as hell. Her mother, Iris, is rather aloof when it comes to keeping Pipper away from the Kell family, despite the rumours and knowledge of the accident. Iris can see that Pip is determined to be with her friend and she doesn't stop the girl from trying, but of course still keeps an eye open to make sure that her daughter doesn't get hurt. The difficulty actually comes from Gabe's parents, mainly his dad, who does everything he can to try and keep Gabe away from others until he can trust his son to not lash out.

Pip doesn't care that she's told to go away, that Gabe was always unable to hang out or talk. She gets a little sneaky with it, able to communicate with Gabe by writing out messages on paper and holding them up at her kitchen window, where he can see through his own and read them. Of course this doesn't last very long, and they both get scolded (by Gabe's dad), but the drive of Pip's determination eventually sways the older man enough to permit her and Gabe to talk, first by phone, then in monitored visits or by internet. At this point, Gabe and Pip are almost at the three year mark since meeting, and the winter when Pip is 11 is when her own story picks up, the horrible incident with her mom being killed occurring.

Again, it's mentioned in my fic, but Pip describes the whole thing as traumatic, and that she breaks down after losing Iris. It's not until Gabe makes a small effort to reach out to her that she is able to start healing, and once that happens, the two begin to bond much more, becoming very close friends and working through all the hardships.

So the story is as follows, after Iris' death:

Pip and Gabe attend high school together once Pip graduates at 14, and there she begins to build other friendships with Swag and the others

Gabe remains her best friend, and gets used to Pip standing up for him against any bullying or unfair treatment regarding his mental health

That said, Gabe isn't magically better, he struggles greatly as a teenager with his mind and often is rude to the people in his life, Pipper being no exception

Even so Pip is patient, taking the time to observe Gabe as he grows up, noting his mannerisms and figuring out how best to interact with him without causing distress

He admittedly does have a couple moments where he's so mean that she gets upset, but the arguments never last very long and Pip doesn't hold any grudges

It's a slow and tedious process but Gabe does grow to a more stable condition, glad that Pip stuck with him all along. He makes it to graduation, which triggers the next step of his relationship with Pipper

Gabe attends an out of town university while Pip finishes her high schooling, and the change leads to a small distance between them, which secretly, Pip worries about

the summer before her senior year, Swag and friends drag her and Gabe along for a small vacation, hiding the fact that they plan on drawing out a confession from Pip, suspecting that she likes Gabe in a manner beyond just friendship

the silly intervention goes sideways of course and leaves Pip rather upset, embarrassed and anxious once her feelings are put on display

however Gabe manages to calm her down and he admits that he was already planning to ask her to be his girlfriend on her 18th birthday in the spring

it's funny and sweet, and it is clear to them both now that while the idea of a proper relationship is weird, it is something they want, even if it's not as involved as other people's would be

Pip and Gabe date each other for about 6 years (counting the time they were engaged) and Gabe moves into Pip's house once he's done university and working a full time job

his dad decides to sell his childhood home and move somewhere smaller, more scenic, still in Thornville but not too close that it's awkward

just after the 5 year mark of their relationship, Gabe gathers all his courage and finally proposes to Pip, who of course accepts. They get married one year later, in a small but pretty June wedding

the two of them live normally for another year or so, but it's then that the events of Pip's unplanned pregnancy occur, and the new chapter regarding the birth of their daughter Abigail begins

Abby is born and as the story goes, Pip and Gabe struggle to figure out how to raise her and maintain their relationship, the strain of such an unexpected life change creating a divide. But of course they do manage to make it work in the end, and Abby grows up in a healthy and happy home with both of them

So! The base of the whole story is that Pip is like a rock to Gabe, keeping him grounded and supporting him unconditionally. Gabe also provides Pipper with a sense of security, being the most important person in her life and doing what he can to provide for her as a partner. It would be wrong to call this a romance, that doesn't apply to Pip and Gabe. But is it love? The answer is yes, in a sense. Pip is more in tune with those deeper feelings and she knows for a fact that she does love Gabe, very much so. Gabe isn't as aware of how to process his emotions, and he even states in my story that he still can't figure it all out, even after Abby is born. But there's a line or two, that sums up his feelings rather well:

"...his chest swelled with an emotion he’d only ever felt with Pipper. He didn’t really know what to call it, but… it made him happy."

So I'd say that even if he can't quite recognize it, he does love her back, in his own way.

The whole story is still being properly written, I have fics lined up for almost every event leading up to Abigail, and then some after that too. I wanna leave most things unsaid to keep it all entertaining, but, that's more or less the gist of it. Two odd companions helping each other through the good and the bad that is life.

Now if you'll excuse me, I must return to bed. I spent way too long writing this out, haha. But thanks again for asking!! I love to talk about it.

[temporalbystander]

The importance of OC's and their reflection on each other.

Those who follow my blog as something more than the occasional post will know all about Faybon and Talli and why they're important. If you don't? Don't worry, I'm about to tell you. Explanation under the cut. Aka. How changing one premise in another story I've been working on leads to a startling realisation.

I created Faybon when the first three seasons of Miraculous were airing. I wanted a character with presence in the world, not enough to alter the laws of the universe, but to care enough to help. I guess Faybon is what I thought Luka was going to be, someone connected to both Marinette and Adrien but still on the outside of the issues those two normally face. Someone capable of giving a comforting shoulder and a new perspective without being a risk regarding an Akuma.

Talli on the other hand? Talli was spawned by a 30 second segment of a dream following the third season ending right before the new York special. Basically Gabriel was in the manor, he gets handed a lizard based miraculous and he tosses it aside. Waking up I remembered those seconds and went "okay. But why?" From that question spiralled Talli's creation. Gabe tossed her aside because she was incomplete, knowledge from the grimoire and of the existence of other miraculous led to the attempt and I just carried on from there.

However, after that moment, when season 4 popped up and gave us episodes like Ephemeral and wish maker, I came to the realisation that time needed to be fixed in this show. That, for whatever reason, Bunnyx NEEDED things to go a certain way. Evolution showed us what that was but that was way later. So, being said at letting her go, but not wanting her to be forgotten, Bunnyx hit reset on the Talli timeline. And, just like that, I came up with the paradox plot point. All because I wanted a reason for Faybon to remember Talli.

Now then... With the end of season 4 and the beginning of Season 5 being the meltdown (for me) that it was, I knew I needed something to throw back into my personal plot. So, with the peacock being able to create anything from living people to akumas and Miraculous users, powers and all. The idea for sentiTalli was made and she was made for a very simple reason. Without her Faybon snaps.

I'd gone so far, putting Faybon on the path I feel Luka was going to be. Kind, supportive, figures out the secret and, while he does get akumatised, the times he's a villain is dangerous because of intelligence not sheer destructive power. But, whereas the showwriters seemed to backtrack, pretty much forgetting Luka existed and Wish maker ever happened, I kept going. I kept putting Faybon in every episodes, heck it was when I started the reaction part of this blog, planning out how things might change when I finally got around to rewriting the show.

So, sad as it is to say, SentiTalli? Was just a coping mechanism. She exists solely to keep Faybon calm as things go further to hell around him. She's important for the illusion of power she provides rather than the actual kwami abilities he made her able to use.

More than that though, and the reason I'm writing this now out of the blue, without Talli? Felix is not getting a pass. With everything Faybon knows, about Felix being the one to hand over the miraculous, about how he managed to get his hands on them in the first place, on how knowing ladybugs identity means that betrayal hits even harder because she thought it was Adrien? The moment Felix appears back in Paris Faybon gets angry. But if that's not bad enough, when he starts getting close to Kagami? Someone Faybon cares for as much as he does the rest of the broken bunch he calls his friends?

Well at first Faybon is suspicious. When Kagami defends Felix though? That whole "you're all wrong about him" bit in the sewers in the episode? Well... Without Talli? It's the last straw. Any encounter would end in a fight and if Faybon ever found out about the whole sentikids thing regarding how Kagami and Adrien were actually "made" for each other? I think he'd go the complete opposite way. He wouldn't see either of them as human any more, just monsters who should be snapped out like the rest. The only thing granting Adrien a reprieve from this malice is that clearly Emelie did something right when making him.

For both Kagami and Felix, holding their own amoks and who should thus be far more in control of themselves than Adrien ever was, for Felix to feel no remorse over betraying Ladybug. And for Kagami to take his side? Faybon would be determined. Neither of them are what could be called human.

Thus we come to the end of season 5. Monarch gets his wish but the world isn't erased. Kagami gets Longg back and Felix just chills with his new girlfriend. Both are basically rewarded and Monarch wins while the heroes still suffer? There's no justice in that. That hatred, that disgust? Would boil away in Faybon until he hears the newest HawkMoth in his head... And that's where he makes his choice. Lila wants power? A wish? Whatever? Fine. She can have it. Faybon doesn't care anymore. He'd rather a world where people like Lila lie and talk their way out of trouble than the one where people like Felix and Kagami are rewarded for betraying their friends.

If she wants his help though? He wants Duusu. He wants to tear the broach from Felix's neck wants to see the fear in his eyes when he realises that all that work was for nothing. That you DON'T get to live happily ever after when you betray someone who counts on you. Even worse, he wants that moment where he realises that Faybon not only holds his life in his hands but Kagami's as well and that, thanks to the constant disagreements turned fights, he has no qualms snapping her out right in front of him. In fact, with how far he's been pushed? He'd do it while laughing.

[petrichoraline]

The northanger abbey anon here, again I agree with your thoughts on the novel, some of the things were rushed especially with ours antagonists so to speak, but it was a fun read and the only thing I knew about it is that it was a parody kinda of gothic novels that were popular in that time so I did feel like I was missing some sort of a context even tho from the writing I can imagine what kind of tropes gothic novels had back then lol so I didn't really go in expecting anything and was not disappointed, I loved Cathrine immediately (the whole reading books and living inside your own head is something I can relate to even now) and by the end I did love henry. Like you said in the novel he wasn't condescending or angry with Cathrine at any point especially not when she revealed her thoughts about his father, he was rather careful not to upset her further (after that conversation in his mother's room when they saw each other again at diner he was gentle with her). So they really did that wrong in the movie, even if I did enjoy it, the cast was good and Cathrine in her riding outfit >>> but we didn't see his house and dogs in the adaptation I believe so that's another minus in my book. I would love a major studio adaptation tho, it would be fun and the whole gothic aesthetic could be done beautifully. I do like p&p movie adaptation the most but they also had the most money lol tho I have to say the most recent emma one was a bit disappointing to me, that was when I had expectations and wanted more action but it was rather calm. The persuasion netflix made was terrible in terms of it not being an adaptation, even tho it was marketed as such, but rather loosely based on the novel. I def recommend reading persuasion tho, I loved the romance of it all even if wenthworth was annoying (he kinda had the right to be but idc).

thank you for reaching out again and sorry for the late reply <3

I also felt i wasn't "in the know" lol but it really didn't affect the experience all that much, you get the impression of what novels she's talking about anyways cause she's so detailed about it 😄

catherine is so relatable it's not even funny, that's why i can't be too upset with her about anything haha and henry being so gentle (again, when he's not being a troll) and firm in his intentions makes him very swoon-worthy (im not over the knowledge of fabrics and flowers, im so happy he was written that way aaa)

I wasnt aware he had his own house the first time I replied to you, I learned shortly after that northanger abbey wasn't his home which makes sense but that's what the book is called so I made assumptions 😗 I'd say best part about it might be that it's fairly far away from his dad's home lol but everything you said you liked about it is a big plus for sure 🤭

(short intermission to show the riding outfit in question, she looks amazing)

the characters were different from how I had imagined them but I could tell they were quite well portrayed even if they didnt fit my personal idea because isabella? that casting and execution were perfect. it helped me see how my interpretation was lacking in some ways because that's not how I had imagined the general either but seeing his behaviour on screen made the book descriptions click. but considering how they butchered that particular scene and with it both catherine and Henry's characterizations, I don't hold the directors vision at the ultimate regard lol

a major studio adaptation without excessive cgi that knows what makes the book good and manages to translate it for the movie or series format would be amazing, we can hope someone comes back to this one because it isn't austens most popular book but there is sooo much potential here!! and we can get all the dogs hahah

i like p&p 2005 but truly only as a standalone thing, comparing it to the book experience is not for me, that was more fun to do with the 1995 series because they were so accurate (though when it comes to looks no one has made me go "yes, perfect casting"); as for emma, I found it quite dull iirc, I was mostly hyped to see the actor who plays adam in sex education was in the role of harriet's (and my) beloved farmer boy😂 the colours were beautiful and the actors great but I think it felt too long and as if nothing really was happenin; I know I didn't watch all the adaptations for that one so I can't pick a fave but thats why I'd just recommend clueless 🫢

now that you mention it, I saw videos about that persuasion adaptation, I mightve even listened to one and spoiled myself but it was quite long ago so I should be fine haha, I feel like not understanding the source material and trying to fit bad tropes into it like circular shapes into rectangle holes is what makes these types of adaptations flop so bad, im sorry you had to experience it, I'd probably save it as a trash watch but at least aware that it's that

and I definitely plan on it! i think I might take my time because I don't have any main novels to read after it, I'll have to search for lady susan and other stories (that's the name of the compilation I've seen if I'm not mistaken); i trust your opinion, I'll try to be more forgiving of mister main lead though I get irritated easily 😂

thank you for sm for sharing 🥰💗💞💓💗💖💕

[wolfsbane-if]

Hi! I don't want to be another person sending a "negative" ask, but maybe I can provide some constructive criticism? If you don't want that, you can obviously stop reading here and delete, lol. I did enjoy this story quite a lot until this update. There were a few things that sort of rubbed me the wrong way in the earlier content, but it was mostly stuff I could ignore. And I think I sort of have to explain those things to explain why I didn't like this update...(1/?)

Hello! Thank you for the feedback! I do value insight like this very much, and I appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts.

I’ve copied your asks and done what I can to address your points and explain my thought process below, as well as expressed some follow-up questions if you’re willing to entertain them. Beware that it is ridiculously long, and if you’d rather just leave your feedback and carry on, that’s more than fair.

One thing I want to start by clarifying is that describing the MC’s capabilities is done within the context of the world, rather than on some intrinsic, omniscient level. Knowledge of the supernatural is extremely limited, and often supernatural beings themselves have to discover their own abilities through a process of trial and error if they have no one to instruct them. There’s very little concrete information on these beings, their abilities, and limitations, so by gathering what information they can, the MC is in a very good place relative to most people but they’re still constrained by the limits of what information is available to be absorbed.

Regarding the disparity between knowing a monsters' strengths and weaknesses vs knowing how they function, I'd personally consider those two different things. This is a world without advanced science or study and so Wolfsbane knowledge has been gathered through experience and passed down, and knowledge coming from hunters is going to primarily focus on combat. Vampires are extremely rare and typically only encountered by humans in hostile situations, so the knowledge regarding how to fight them is far more prevalent than knowledge of their biology. Nobody's ever fought a vampire, been bitten, not turned, and survived to share the tale, so it's always been assumed that all bites are dangerous, like with lycanthropy.

Essentially the MC, while powerful compared to their contemporaries, is still operating on incomplete information because they only have access to so much of it. Additionally, the MC’s companions can sometimes provide personal insight into matters that might be only understood on a surface level or in general, or in situations where an individual’s perspective may differ.

Something I’ve tried to get at - and perhaps failed? - with writing Wolfsbane is that most supernaturals are “good”. The skewed perspective results from the fact that they, in an attempt at self-preservation, remain largely isolated from humanity (like Harlow has demonstrated up until now). Those who crossed into the ‘human side’ and caused harm were the only exposure that humans had to supernatural beings, resulting in misconceptions and fear of the supernatural in general. This fear has led to indiscriminate hunting of the supernatural on sight, which has led to further isolation, and the cycle continues. When people decry the supernatural as being bad and dangerous, they’re doing so based on, again, incomplete information.

The supernatural population is also generally very low, and encounters - be they aggressive or peaceful - aren’t that common, aside from hellhounds. The game has taken place over one week and a couple of flashbacks to this point, and the experiences that have been lived so far aren’t necessarily representative of the norm. I would like to be able to explore more of the MC’s history as a Wolfsbane in flashbacks going forward, which would likely address some of these concerns, I imagine.

So far, the aggressors that the MC has faced have been a vampire in the prologue, a human hunter in chapter one, hellhounds in chapter two, a werewolf in chapter three, and now a human noble. To me, it feels like a relatively fair split demonstrating that neither humans nor supernaturals are consistently ‘the bad guy’, but I understand if your feelings differ.

I also wonder if it might be a bit reductive to put people in a category of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ in general. The ghost in the ghost backstory flashback could be considered an antagonist, but their actions were a result of desperation. Garamond’s father left an entire community of ‘good’ werewolves to be with the woman he loved, and tragically lost her. While it’s true that some individuals simply lack a strong moral framework and some motives simply can’t be known or understood by the MC, I’ve tried to include nuance within the actions of many characters, and I hope that the MC’s thoughts and perspective after their change will offer some more insight into the supernatural side of things going forward.

And just as a side note, an MC who uses magic would be considered a witch, although it’s not something they typically advertise because that naturally invites complications. I could see about finding ways for the MC to refer to themself as such if that was unclear, though. 

I'm very sorry to have recalled a memory like that for you with my writing. It's something I've tried to be conscious of (and in fact Garamond references a similar term in the flashback to when you hire them while expressing their distaste for it). The intention within the context of the game is that Harlow has just declared that the MC isn't like most hunters and expresses confusion over it, and the MC is trying to point out that it's not all that surprising when Harlow has similarly distanced themself from what's 'expected' of them. I can definitely revisit that exchange and try to reword it to be more clear and less uncomfortable, though. My sincerest apologies for that.

While probably not worth much, I can assure you that the conflict within Wolfsbane is not intended as an allegory for race, although I understand that parallels will seem to make themselves apparent regardless. I do want this to be a world where being a supernatural being of a specific variety comes with innate biological struggles, advantages, and tendencies; and where there are misconceptions that convey all members in a group in a certain, negative way. Although monsters are not representative of races in the real world, it makes sense that the text, while trying to convey these ideas, would hearken back to those stereotypes, and if you or anyone else has suggestions on how to better differentiate and separate the events of the game from that real world mindset, I would be eager to hear them.

Regarding the opposing ideologies: yes, that’s very much the case. Indeed, the core thesis of Wolfsbane is that everyone is ultimately an individual who makes their own choices, but it’s being explored in a world where the vast majority oppose this idea and it affects how events are spoken about and perceived, and it is a world in which the MC is immersed. Apologies for the whiplash on that front; and I’ll consider if there are ways I can better communicate the idea.

I don’t have much to say here except, hey, that’s fair! I’ve tried to imply that the MC, worn down after a cascade of complications and days on the road, is not operating anywhere near at the top of their game, but if the way the events unfold seem unrealistic to you: valid.

I don’t think that’s something I’ll end up rewriting because A) that’s a huge part of the chapter and direction of the narrative, and B) the order of events seems to work for most people, but yeah, definitely a valid perspective and I’m sorry to hear it took you out of the game

This goes back to the earlier point about supernaturals not actually being largely ‘bad’ and that being a stereotype among humans based on specific experiences, but I can provide some additional insight as well.

The thinking here is that the alternative is death regardless, so it's worth taking the chance, even if something were to go wrong. If the attempt at saving the MC were to fail for whatever reason, the end result would ultimately be the same. Garamond goes through with turning the MC despite being terrified of accidentally killing them because it was what the MC wanted, so yes, they would also be prepared to kill the MC out of necessity afterwards. Not saying it wouldn't be absolutely horrible for them, but it was a calculated risk on their part.

I also want to point out that the transition to a supernatural life is far kinder on those who have guidance and support systems. Harlow's sire had no direction and struggled to learn and adapt, leading to him accidentally killing Harlow and losing his regard for humanity over a number of years. Turning doesn't immediately deprive an individual of their morals or instill corruption, but instead introduces new instincts and urges to contend with, and both Garamond and Harlow believed that by being there to assist the MC in learning how to adapt, they'd be at a much lower risk of losing themself. It’s not a case of the MC being special as an individual, but rather that they’re just in a relatively good position to manage it, and Garamond and Harlow are both reasonably confident in their ability to handle whatever comes of it.

-

In closing, thank you again for providing your feedback and perspective. I very much appreciate your respectful approach and I’m glad you brought these concerns to my attention. I hope my response has been able to clarify some things, and I hope I’ll be able to make use of your input to improve the game going forward. Just like writing and sharing an incomplete work isn’t easy, I can’t imagine critiquing one is, either, and while there are definitely things I’m trying to do with my story that may not be clear yet, I fully acknowledge that having an idea and conveying it effectively are two different beasts entirely.

If you decide not to continue with Wolfsbane from here, thank you for the time you’ve given it until now.

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

What do you think would be the best balance between allowing misinformation to run rampant and policing every post for wordcrimes. I would love to live in a world where antivaxxers are cut off from their conspiracy theories, but I'd also like free speech to remain a thing.

"Sunlight is the best disinfectant."

This is a quote perhaps from some learned microbiologist in regard to the effect of ultraviolet radiation on microbial life, perhaps from some David Avocado-like lunatic pseudoscience crank in regard to sunning your perineum, perhaps from author in regard to the metaphor of exposing corruption to the light of day.

For my purposes here, the particulars are not especially relevant.

With the advent of the printing press, the Church gained the ability to spread the Word of God™ further and wider than it ever had before, to spread the Good News™ of salvation through Jesus Christ© to all, to the extent of becoming as ubiquitous in hotel rooms as the regular toilet paper rolls.

Unfortunately for the Church, this also had the effect of bestowing the idiot tales concocted by propagandists 1400 years prior at the time, into the hands of the average peasant, for them to read for themselves about the talking donkey and Yahweh's bloodlust, rather than relying entirely on the say-so of the preacher whose livelihood and social standing and authority depends on keeping up the ruse.

The creation of the printing press could be said to be real origin of the rise of the nones.

Access to the internet, followed by pervasive access to the internet, has performed the same functions, but at an accelerated pace. It is true that Xians can proselytize and recruit with their stupid apologetics, outright lies and, of course, their own profound ignorance of their own religion. And do so without being limited by the physical barriers of the real world.

But it is also true that the incipient collapse of Xianity in the west is driven by the same developments that sometimes also allow it to spread. The entire bible and quran are a bookmark away, and the counter-apologetics to insipid rationalizations such as "iTs A mEtApHoR!" and "yOu CaNt PrOvE gOd DoEsNt ExIsT!" are no further than a quick Google away.

My own aspiration is to be as close to a free-speech abolutist as one might conceivably be. Imperfectly at present, as like anyone, the impulse occasionally arises to see oxygen thieves dispensed into digital oblivion. But I recognize this as an illiberal impulse.

To that end, I would only ban things that are already illegal. Doxing, incitement to violence, etc. And apply them consistently.

The liberal process works by letting the misinformation into the light so that it can be visible and refuted, and those refutations seen. For the nonsense to be seen and exposed, so that people can be inoculated against that same pseudoscientific, superstitious or other nonsense.

The risk in banning it is that it becomes a form of secret knowledge and "the thing they don't want you to know" and thus attractive. If it's on display and everyday, and particularly if the refutation is likewise on display and everyday, people will be less likely to be drawn to it.

If antivax is hidden away, so to will the anti-antivax. The topic goes silent, and the societal "herd immunity" to antivax rhetoric drops, inviting, as we've seen with polio and smallpox, a later re-emergence of it to a future population with no acquired defence.

[off-your-feet]

to preface this, i am not super knowledgeable regarding League lore (there's so much info out there) BUT i am super into Arcane and therefore know how some of the characters have been changed in it compared to their original League design/personality. Let's just say, the blanks have been FILLED and in some places, already existing game lore was scrapped to make room for more interesting storytelling of Arcane.

Basically, League characters that ended up in Arcane were majorly overhauled. Jinx, who was pretty much just a manic pixie (nightmare?) girl trope got an insane amount of very traumatic backstory that completely changed the perception of her character. The same goes for Vi, who on top of that also got very significant design changes to more reflect the type of character she is meant to portray. That goes for I believe for most characters in the show - no need to go into detail of each one. With Arcane getting so popular and how well received and praised its characters were/are, Riot is now retconing actual League lore and changing characters and events to match what they did in Arcane. I don't have enough info on this as I actually don't care about League as the game, but I know it's happening and that a lot of League players aren't happy about it.

As obvious from the above, so many characters in League - including the main cast of Arcane - are super flat and mostly are just a representation of certain tropes from what I understand. What Riot did through Arcane was taking those flat ass characters and giving them a backstory that at least partially fits their original trope and also gives them an immense amount of depth.

I am pretty sure that is what is going to happen in the Valorant movie (if the movie ever comes out). Now a movie doesn't have the same run time as tv series and I'd guess that Valo movie is going to be more action-based for obvious reasons, so it is possible there will 1) only be very limited cast and/or 2) the focus will be more on the the world building and overall lore, rather than character lore and their depth. Regardless of that, it wouldn't make sense if the included characters wouldn't get a lot more personal depth anyway (why else would we care about them and the movie lol) - including the portrayal/aftermath of the sweet sweet trauma that comes from getting magical powers/living through such an insane and major change in the world as we know it/fighting or killing yourself or your friends from an alternate reality lmao (depending on when within the Valorant timeline will the movie be set).

The thing is, Riot knows fans care about the characters they play as - parasocial relationships keep people interested and sell and Riot likes feeding into that, as do most video game companies. I know you ironically mentioned Viper as an example of someone who Riot simply cannot add dramatic trauma lore to because of the sexy femme fatale poison evil scientist lady trope she has going on and I absolutely get why that seems logical. But as someone who watched Arcane and has seen what they have done with the characters there compared to their League origins, I would actually argue that this is exactly the character who Riot might add all this crazy trauma and backstory to, exactly BECAUSE of who she turned out to be and who we know her as now. You just don't end up acting like Viper without a traumatizing past (her fanservice bodysuit aside). Jinx is specifically a good example here as she is also a character in the category of 'something definitely happened to you and that's why you ended up this way' and Riot pulled off writing and portraying that 'something' in Arcane masterfully.

Now with all that said, I don't think League and Valorant are 100% comparable in this scenario. League is a very old game - when it first came out, the studio was not even sure if anyone would be playing the game a year from the launch date. Most of the characters in League came out so long ago Arcane might have just been an idea in someone's head (Jinx for example was introduced in 2013 and it was confirmed that Riot started planning Arcane around 2014-2015 I believe). Of course the characters in the game and the characters in the show differ so much - there is like a decade of characters that were meant to be just interesting (and hot) enough for people to pick them in a strategy-based game that did not need them to have complex personalities. The prospect of them getting flashed out in a show or a movie just wasn't a realistic scenario at that time.

Now compare that to Valorant, which came out in 2020 when Riot already 1) had shit loads of money + publicity and 2) knew that Arcane will be out like a year and a half later. Considering how much Riot wanted Valorant to be their next flagship and to conquer the first person shooter market, you can absolutely bet that ideas about possible shows/movies/etc. were introduced early on as part of discussions regarding potential future monetary/publicity gains during talks with stakeholders. AND considering that talks about a Valorant movie have been around for at least a year or two now, it is kind of obvious that a movie/show have been a possibility for Valorant from the very beginning. If the movie actually comes out in the next year or two, it was definitely greenlit the moment Arcane got insanely popular and Valorant started hitting high numbers and proved its lasting popularity as well.

With that in mind, it would be logical to assume that Valorant agents and their world were made in such a way that would be easily translated into a movie/tv series adaptation. That is why I don't think League and Valorant are fully comparable. Unlike what is now happening in League, I don't think Riot will introduce any major changes to Valorant lore or drastically visually or personality-wide change any of the agents simply because they were probably already written in such a way that would allow Riot to fill in the purposeful blanks while keeping their in-game personality intact even when it's futher expanded upon.

Now this is all just hypothetical, obviously - I might be completely wrong and giving Riot wayyy too much credit. But those are my two cents based on my knowledge of how Riot has been working as a company so far and how they approached the transformation of League characters to Arcane.

for anyone that has watched arcane and follows league of legends lore - how does the characterization differ between show and game? obviously you can fill in details and craft story way more extensively in the format of a show, but what did the sketches of arcane's characters look like in the game itself?

i'm wondering bc one thing about valo lore as it exist in the game is just how flat everyone is. obviously, it's a tac shooter - you're not going to add in that your sexy femme fatale poison evil scientist lady is extremely deeply uber traumatized and is self-flagellating about it all the time. that could not be less interested to a majority of people who play.

i ask this just because the characters in game can be astoundingly flat. because lore is not a priority, all the characters are extremely vague outline. there's hint of backstory and interpersonal relationships between agents, but unless an agent feels strongly about another, a lot of them lack personal motivation entirely.

there's rumours of a valorant movie - where a lot of the blanks will be filled in - but i am curious as to the extent of the blanks in league lore going into the release of arcane as someone who doesn't much of anything about league lore.