#i'm not super confident about this one actually but i hope you like it anon

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

umm how dark are u willing to go? I'm thinking abt turning to a life of prostitution and the ghoul being your first ever client and he's not very gentle about it, (plus you're scared bc he's a ghoul ffs) in fact he's very smug bc he's the first client, probably buys you for the night :) mwah xoxo

Working Girl

Pairing: Cooper Howard/The Ghoul x Sex Worker Female Reader

Word Count: 5,411

Warnings: smut (18+), sex for pay, rough sex, knife play, cannibalistic threats (he's joking...kinda), spitting, hair pulling, humiliation, rope play, dacryphilia, face and throat fucking, cum facial, some dubcon elements, soft-ish ending (I cannot help myself).

Notes: My answer to that question is "darker than this", anon. I suppose I should probably put together some sort of "wills-and-wonts" pinned post, though, honestly, there aren't many of the latter. With smut and romance content, I think it's important to keep an open mind and broaden your horizons. We are cool with sex work and sex workers in this house, by the way.

I had to let this one stew a bit to decide what direction I wanted to go with it. I'm obsessed with the idea of Cooper menacing around in New Vegas, so I hope you're alright with that. I am also obsessed with the outfits the sex workers outside the casinos wear. I went a little crazy with the length on this one, but I'm super happy with how it turned out. Hope you like it! XOXO

The uniform you'd been given for your new job was absolutely humiliating.

Sure, you looked...nice. They'd fed you, for once you'd had plenty of water, got the first chance to bathe that you'd had in weeks, maybe months. You'd even been able to wash your hair, a rare, rare thing that still had you trying to smell the silky strands as they blew by your face. Initially, you'd felt quite confident, actually; the cropped top even had sleeves, the tight black skirt and heels making your legs look quite nice, even if they were uncomfortable to walk and stand in.

However, your confidence had diminished a bit when they'd given you the black leather collar to wear around your neck, reducing to basically zero when you actually stepped outside to begin your work.

Okay, you had technically done this before, traded sex for medicine or repair work or a place to stay. Honestly, at this point, you thought you'd had more sex for trade than sex for pleasure, the latter hard to come by for someone as picky about actual dating as you. But it felt like one thing to have someone offer it in the moment, when you were truly desperate and a spur-of-the-moment decision was distastefully easy to make. This, standing along the New Vegas Strip and advertising yourself for it, felt like another. A late evening breeze blew across the road, stirring up some dust and making you shiver.

If you were honest with yourself, you got off easy. You weren't sure what the guys and girls with the chains around their bodies and their nipples exposed had done, right or wrong, to earn that uniform, but you weren't eager to find out.

There was a man across the way, leaning against the wall in the shadows outside the tram station, a lit cigarette hanging loosely from his hand. You couldn't see his face, obscured by a dingy, wide-brimmed cowboy hat, his figure hidden as well by a long, dark duster that was incredibly ratty at the ends. He'd been there a while; you weren't sure how long, but you were fairly certain he'd been checking you out. His smokes were lasting an awfully long time.

You'd been told that oftentimes johns were too nervous to initiate the transaction themselves, that you needed to be fun and flirty and try to hook them in yourself if you wanted any business. It didn't help that you, too, were nervous to initiate, but you wanted this to work out, at least for now, and no one else had been interested so far.

"Hey there, handsome. Are you looking to party?" you called out to him, waving as playfully as possible.

That got him, the burning red cherry at the end of his smoke glowing brightly for a few seconds before he tossed it to the ground, exhaling a big cloud of smoke as he stubbed it out with the toe of his boot.

"Handsome, huh? It's been a hot, hot minute since anyone called me that, darlin'." he drawled, his voice actually quite nice. His footsteps gave off a funny little jingle you couldn't place, and you calmly took him in as he approached. But then he came close enough that you could see his face, see the pits and the sunken eye sockets and the gaping hole in the middle of his face where a nose was supposed to be.

A ghoul. Holy shit, he was a ghoul.

Now, you didn't have anything against ghouls, per se, not like some people certainly seemed to. You didn't like the idea of anyone being barred from towns and outposts or harassed just because of what they were, to no fault of their own. You still gave pause at the idea of sleeping with one. Couldn't it make you sick? Didn't some ghouls eat people? Or was that just the feral ones? No, that was stupid. There were people who ate people in this world. Of course a ghoul could possibly eat you.

"Busy the rest of the night?" he asked as if it were automatically the response he'd receive.

You tried your best to giggle playfully, desperate to no longer have to stand outside and solicit for a while, even if it meant your first trick was a doozy.

"Not if you've got the caps." you replied, clenching your shaking hands behind your back.

"Oh, I've got 'em, sweetheart. So." he asked, looking you blatantly up and down. "Are we gonna party or what?"

The two of you made your way into the casino, the bright lights throwing intriguing shadows across your new friend's gaunt face. You left him at the front desk and told him where could meet you after he relinquished all of his weapons, including the big gun strapped to his back. You'd be happy to see that go.

After you left him, you went to the back to check in and described the john you were going back with. When you said he was a ghoul, you expected some sort of reaction or concern, but all the older woman behind the counter did was produce a Rad-X from a half-empty bottle and push it across the counter at you along with a room key.

"Room three. He paid for the night." she said flatly, barely looking your way. "You're gonna wanna take that now, not later."

You picked it up and turned to walk towards the back rooms where the dates happened. You were a little floored he'd paid for that much time; you'd been anticipating an hour, maybe two. But all night? Did turning into a ghoul give you some sort of super stamina? Or did he have other plans for you?

As you passed by the doorway to the gambling floor, you could see him still standing at the counter emptying his pockets.

Just how many weapons did one person need?

Hesitating a moment, you waited to catch his eye, holding up your hand and flashing him three fingers. He gave you a slight nod, and you continued on, unlocking the third door down the adjacent, isolated hall. The rooms weren't much but the basics; a dingy but functional bed, a chair and side table with a jug of water and a few glasses in the corner. A lamp with a stained shade. A clock to keep track of the time. That was about it. You poured yourself a small glass of water from the jug and swallowed the Rad-X down, a bitter taste coating the inside of your mouth. Pulling a face, you took a fidgety seat at the foot of the bed to wait for your companion for the night to arrive, leaving your uncomfortable heels on.

Don't take off the shoes before the john gets in there, you'd been told. Some guys like to take everything off themselves.

You were pulled from your ruminations by the sound of the door creaking open, making you startle ever-so-slightly as he entered.

The people at the front desk had almost certainly offered to take his hat and coat, but it seemed he had declined. Maybe he had some particular personal attachment to them, you thought as he shucked the dirty duster, hanging it by the door. The hat remained on as he turned and appraised you, sitting straight on the bed, your hands daintily in your lap. He still wore a few layers, but you took comfort in knowing that he'd had his pockets emptied. They'd let him keep the lasso he'd been wearing, though, and you eyed it cautiously as it hung from his hip.

The ghoul didn't say anything to you as he crossed the room, pouring himself a tall glass of water and sitting in the chair, drinking it down as he stared at you. That sent you squirming ever so slightly, uncertain of how you were supposed to react.

"So, how long have you been in town?" you asked, eager to fill the silence. He didn't answer for an unsettlingly long time, finishing the first glass of water and pouring another.

"Long enough. Just blowing through." he replied, brim over his eyes and glass over his mouth.

"Ah." you responded, unsure what else to say to that. Things were quiet again for a long time, several minutes passing as you watched him dig an inhaler out of his pocket and take a long drag. You weren't sure what it was; you'd recognize a Jet container. Lots of people used it.

"I was surprised you wanted me for the whole night." you confessed.

"That right?" he responded. "Not in this line of work long, eh?"

"Oh. Uh, I guess." you replied, taken aback by that. "It's just that all night's a long time."

You were trying to make your voice as sweet and seductive as possible, despite the tingle of worry creeping up your spine.

"It sure is." he replied, a glint in his eye that you couldn't read. It frightened you a little, but you told yourself you were overreacting. Another few minutes passed by, another puff of the inhaler, before he raised his hand, still wearing those thick gloves, and beckoned you over. You stood, somewhat shakily walked over to stand in front of him as he sat reclined in the chair, and waited for him to direct you.

"Alright," he said, voice calm as ever as he suddenly produced a long, slender blade from...somewhere. "let's get that outfit off."

This, of course, sent you screaming, turning quickly to flee towards the door. However, he quickly appeared behind you, a hand moving to cover your mouth with one of those filthy gloves as he yanked you back into his chest, making you stumble in those awful shoes. The smell of leather and gunpowder washed over you.

"Jesus Christ." he said, mild annoyance in his tone as he held you almost effortlessly with the one arm. "If you're already screamin' like this when we ain't even had any fun, maybe you ain't cut out for this, baby doll. Never seen a knife before?"

Your hollering choked down into a little cry as the strange-smelling glove muffled you, as you took in what he said. You desperately didn't want to fuck up this job on your literal first night, didn't want to lose a chance to have some stability, a roof over your head. But you couldn't stop the way your brain screamed at you to run. He brought the blade back up to your eye level, turning it to and fro, as if to show it off to you, the small silver blade glinting dangerously in the lamplight.

"You aren't supposed to have that." you whimpered between his fingers, trembling.

"Lotsa people do things they aren't supposed to in this world." was his reply as he slid the blade directly between your breasts, slicing through the crop top from hem to collar. You swore you felt the blade swipe your skin, and it made you gasp in fear, but when you looked, the skin was untouched.

His hands made quick work of the button and zipper of your skirt, dropping it around you feet and leaving you standing before him in nothing but your underwear and your uncomfortable shoes, your heart clamoring in your rib cage.

Looking you up and down once more, he stepped back and took in the whole scene before slinking back down into the chair in the corner, his hands moving down to undo his own belt and fly. He paused, however, to invite you forward again, urging you to close the few foot distance between you. You moved as instructed, still shaken as you stood a foot or so in front of him.

"Kneel."

Carefully, you lowered yourself down onto the scuffed old floor, cool against your bare knees as you looked up at him.

From this angle, it was much easier to see his whole face, including his eyes, and they were gorgeous. You hadn't noticed before, between the nerves and the hat, that they were like pools of dark honey. They distracted you so much that you missed him actually tugging his cock free. When you looked down at it, you were pleasantly surprised at how normal it looked, save for the radiation-roughened texture of the skin. Save for that, all the normal parts were there in normal quantities. You let out a very soft sigh of relief.

"Well, go on." he said, brandishing the thing at you like a weapon. "If you're gonna be a whore, you gotta act like one."

You could feel yourself pouting at his statement, and you hated it, hated the way his words rang through your brain, but you felt some ease at finally getting into something you had experience with, at least. Promptly crawling forward the last foot or so, you let yourself sit a tad more comfortably, leaning forward and reaching out to wrap your fingers around him.

"Uh-uh." he corrected, stopping you in your tracks. "If you're any good at it, you shouldn't need your hands."

This gave you some pause, scanning him over as your palms came to rest on the bit of exposed chair between his legs. Slowly, you leaned forward and dragged your tongue along the underside of his erection, sending it twitching at the contact. The man sitting before you hummed in approval, fully reclining against the back of the chair to watch you closely as you cocked your head somewhat awkwardly to allow your lips to wrap around the tip. He tasted differently than you were accustomed to, you thought as you began to let your head bob up and down on the first few inches of him, your tongue running along the leaking slit; there was an almost metallic aftertaste to him, like licking a cap.

"There you go." he praised lowly as you slid down to take as much of him as you comfortably could, his right hand coming to softly fist in your hair. The movement made you vaguely suspicious, and rightly so, as a few moments later, his other hand joined the first, and together they held your head in place, his hips pistoning up to fuck your face. You tolerated it well, only gagging at the last few thrusts when it seemed he was trying to push deeper and deeper. When you did, the sensation made him pull your head back, his saliva-coated cock laying against his leather-clad stomach as he appraised you, his eyes largely obscured again, drool all over your lips and chin.

"Let's move over to the bed, shall we?" he said, already standing by the time he finished.

Awkwardly, you attempted to right yourself out of your kneeling posture, but before you could even try, he stooped and grabbed you around the waist, tossing you over his shoulder like you weighed absolutely nothing. He was so strong and it made you blush as an indignant sound left you.

"Hey!" you let out before you could stop yourself. You weren't supposed to complain, but it felt like he was almost antagonizing you.

"Allow me." he replied, shooting you a look over his shoulder.

He dropped you down back onto the foot of the bed rather unceremoniously, your hair falling in your face and eyes; when you moved it away again, the switchblade was back in his hand, and you screamed again, unable to stop yourself.

"Keep it comin', sweetheart. I doubt anyone's rushing in here to help you. Honestly, I think they'd respond quicker if you quit screamin' for too long." he said, mocking.

"Quit scaring me and I'll quit screaming!" you shot back, righting yourself so that you were at least properly sitting upright.

"Boy, you sure do love to run that filthy little cocksucking mouth of yours, don'tcha?" he sneered, grabbing your hair again and yanking you close. "Pretty sure I'm payin' you to put out, not to bitch."

The blade traced back down your cleavage to dig into the waistband of your black bra, quickly slicing through it as well and sending your breasts popping out, the now damaged garment hanging uselessly from your arms. The ghoul insistently urged you down onto your back by your hair, and you followed, your legs dangling over the foot of the bed past your knee. For a moment, he simply looked at you.

"Open your mouth." he demanded, leaning over you.

You did as you were told, the command not unusual, but then he puckered his lips and let a rather large gob of spit fall onto your tongue, sending you gagging and scrambling to sit up.

"Nope. Swallow it." he said, maintaining that painful grip against your scalp, keeping you on your back. "You need to remember where your place is right about now, girlie."

Incensed, you hesitated a moment before forcing yourself to do as he told you. Your face was burning bright red with humiliation. He was still leaning over you, bringing the sharp edge close to your skin again. You steeled yourself, calling his bluff despite how dangerous that felt, trying your best to keep your eyes on his, challenging him as he traced the point across your flesh.

"Such pretty, smooth skin." he muttered, watching your reaction closely. "Looks good enough to slice a piece off and eat..."

As he spoke, he let the sharpened edge dig fully into the side of your breast, and you let out a whimper, your stomach rolling at the feeling, at his words. You were certain he was about to really hurt you.

However, he stopped after a moment, pulling the thing away to reveal nothing more than a thin red dash the length of the blade. A kitten scratch. A joke. You looked to him rather incredulously, and he rolled his eyes, folding the edge back into its handle, showing you that it was fully closed before tossing it across the room, landing with a thud in the chair.

"Since you're so afraid of it." he taunted, putting his hands on your hips to flip you onto your stomach. "Hands and knees. Face down."

A frustrated huff escaped you at this newest little jape as you pulled yourself up into the proper position, watching him out of the corner of your eye, your face buried in the musty mattress. It was hard to focus your vision like this, but you watched him move up towards the head of the bed until you couldn't see him anymore. There was a sound you couldn't put your finger on, quick and quiet, but by the time you could even hazard a guess at what it was, he'd seized your right arm by the wrist and was wrapping the rope he'd been carrying around it, finishing it off with a knot. This was enough for you to risk a quick glimpse in his direction, only to see that he'd used the lasso to tie your arm to the head of the bed. Your heart raced as he gave the knot at the headboard a yank before disappearing behind you, tugging your collar loose and dropping it on the floor.

He left the heels on.

"It's funny that these fancy casinos think all these dirtbags and desert rats'll come in here and just give up every weapon they have willingly. That's not how things work out there, and it's still not how they work in here, no matter how much they pretend it is." he mused, his voice making it seem almost as if he were talking to himself and not you. His still-gloved hand petted at the round globe of your ass.

Now you were annoyed. Why was he fucking with you like this?

"Are you a dirtbag or a desert rat?" you muttered into the sheets, jumping when he suddenly grabbed you by your hair again in response, holding you tight in his grip as he forced you to look at him.

"I'm the first thing, darlin'. It'll be good for you to learn the difference." he said, actually smirking at you, at the pained look on your face as the feeling once more burned in your scalp, one of his hands slowly moving up the back of your thigh to stroke your mound over your underwear. Quickly, he pushed them aside, his longest finger tracing up and down your embarrassingly wet slit, and you bit your lips hard to muffle the moan you wanted to let out.

Soon, he was working that finger inside you, then another, and another, all in quick succession; this wasn't about making you feel good, it was about making sure you could take him properly. You could feel the head of his cock nudging against your bare ass cheek, leaking and throbbing. He was eager, no matter how cool and calm he seemed to be.

"Spread your legs more." he mumbled, knee pushing at your right leg to "help" you open yourself wider for him. You did as much as possible, feeling like you could fall at any moment. However, you tensed again when you felt the tip of him slip through your folds, collecting some of the wetness there before sliding down to press at your entrance. You held your breath.

It burned when he pushed inside, though whether that was because of the rough texture of his skin or because you weren't completely prepared, you didn't know. He didn't give you much time to adjust to his size, simply bracing one knee against the mattress as he began to fuck you. The sound of flesh slapping flesh filled the room, his blunt cock head slamming painfully against your cervix.

At one point, he shifted himself higher over you, seeking a way to be deeper inside. The change in angle caused the slick head of his cock to slip out of you for a moment, pressing against your taut asshole for just a split second, but it was enough to make you panic, squirming wildly beneath him. Pure fear shot up your spine. He only laughed sardonically, tugging your hair to make you look over your shoulder at him.

"You're lucky I ain't real mean, sweetheart." he murmured, slamming his cock back into your leaking, sore cunt. The way it hit hard against your already tender cervix made you whimper, but you were glad he didn't do what you'd thought he was gonna do. It was upsetting you that you weren't more upset, frankly. The whole thing made you wanna be sick, especially the part where you were insanely close to orgasm suddenly.

"The funniest part of all this is that you're still gettin' off on it." he called you out as if he could read your mind.

You desperately shook your head, silent tears beginning to run down your cheeks and tickle onto your chin. You weren't enjoying this, weren't enjoying the rough way he was using you. You certainly weren't enjoying those strangely captivating eyes pinning you as he held you down.

"Please." he scolded. "It's one thing to be a whore. It's another thing to be a liar."

That actually managed to draw an embarrassing little sniffle from you; not his taunts, but the fact that you were fluttering so enthusiastically around him at his words. The man on top of you tilted his head again at this, watching you teeter on the edge of something terribly amazing.

"Poor pretty thing." he cooed with fake sympathy, rubbing away an errant tear with his thumb. Your neck ached at the angle he was holding it at. "Open."

You obeyed, and he spat in your mouth again. It actually didn't have much taste, and you swallowed with no complaint, your brain foggy from the rough way he was fucking you. The feeling of humiliation was still there, creeping hot up your back, but it also made you clench hard around him.

"Fuck." he snarled, suddenly pulling back from you, standing beside the bed again, one hand jerking himself as he grabbed you up onto your knees once more, his fist in your hair as he rubbed and slapped his throbbing cock against your face.

"Open your fuckin' mouth." he growled, pushing himself as far back down your throat as he could go as soon as you did, both hands cupping the back of your head as he skull-fucked you with wild abandon. Your hands braced on his hips, your efforts to blunt his thrusts futile. You gagged and choked and drooled as he used your throat; embarrassingly, one of your hands appeared on your swollen, aching clit, rubbing it in tight circles as he began to throb.

"Shit, girlie, you're gonna make me cum." he panted, pulling himself back from you, leaving you sputtering for air as he resumed rubbing his cockhead on your lips and cheeks. His eyes were burning into yours. "Better keep your mouth closed."

You clenched your lips between your teeth just as the first jet of his release hit your cheek, much thicker and hotter than you'd anticipated, another and then another, seemingly an endless amount covering your entire lower face, dribbling from your lips and chin as he groaned and growled his way through it. Your hand was still rubbing furiously between your legs, and he must've noticed, slipping his fingers down in place of yours and rubbing those same circles, his rough touch just what you needed to fall over the edge as well, moaning loudly as your whole body seized.

Everything was eerily quiet and calm as you both let your breathing settle, one hand supporting his weight against the wall by the head of the bed for a moment, his eyes hidden by the hat once more. Surprisingly, he undid the knot at the headboard, then the one around your wrist, tossing the rope down onto the floor next to the bed as he went rummaging around in his pockets. You noticed that he was tucked back away into his pants. Suddenly, a dingy handkerchief was pressed into your palm; it took you a moment to realize that he intended for you to clean the mess from your face with it.

You set to it, the incredibly thick, almost gelatinous substance difficult to wipe away with the thin square of cloth, but you managed to make it happen. Mostly. As you tidied yourself, he pulled the inhaler from one pocket and a rumpled pack of cigarettes from another, taking a puff and jamming a cig between his thin, cracked lips. He paused to hold the pack out to you, and you shook your head.

"You can take a break, kid. We've got all night." he said, lighting the smoke and sitting down on the edge of the bed.

You supposed he was right; you were absolutely exhausted physically after that whole ordeal, and it was his time. If he was alright with you resting some, you'd rest some. Carefully, you crawled up and laid your head on one of the pillows, your side against his back as he sat there, smoking and righting his clothes. In the back of your head, a little bug nagged at you.

"How did you know?" you asked, voice almost timid.

"Hmm?" he replied, his focus seemingly on re-winding the lasso.

"How did you know that, uh, tonight's my first night on the job?"

This got him to turn to you, a mischievous, but not unkind gleam in his gaze.

"I watched you for a while. Just got off the tram when you came outside, wanted a smoke. Noticed you. Couldn't not notice you. You looked like a nervous little bunny out there, just waitin' for a hawk to come and snatch you up."

"So you decided to be the hawk?"

"Yep."

You were both quiet again at this, the perfectly coiled rope now sitting near your feet. Outside, you could hear the clinking of glasses, the drunken laughter of gamblers and bar patrons. Your eyelids were so heavy.

You'd sort of assumed that you would want to cry yourself to sleep after what you'd been through, between the roller coaster of emotions and the general humiliation of it all; oddly enough, you didn't. Instead, you drifted off into a brief, fitful rest, dreaming of disgusting leather gloves and radiation-pillaged skin.

-

The Strip at twilight was quite the sight, the neon and bright colors washed mute by the early morning hues. It would be nice to stop and admire if you weren't so desperate to get out of town.

As much as you were loathe to admit it, the ghoul you'd been with the night before was right; you absolutely weren't cut out for this. You'd hated every single second of trying to entice people to pay you for sex, the way people had looked and leered at you as they'd gone by. Besides, your employers gave you the impression that they didn't have your best interest at heart. They also gave you the creeps.

And if anyone in the future wanted to go further than he had, you now knew you wouldn't be able to handle it. Though, you'd be lying if you said that you hadn't learned some things about yourself.

An unidentifiable feeling passed over you as you thought of him.

You'd awoken, shocked you'd managed to sleep at all, with quite the start, eyes frantically jumping to the clock to find that only about half an hour had passed. To your genuine surprise, the ghoul was gone, several hours still left in the time he'd paid for. The jug of water on the table was empty. You'd waited dutifully, naked on the bed, for the remainder of his time slot. You'd even kept the heels on. At first, you'd wondered if he'd maybe gone to the bar for a drink. But after another hour passed, you were fairly certain he wasn't coming back. Despite yourself, you were strangely disappointed.

At the end of his paid time, the end of your shift, you checked back in at the desk, collected your pay, and immediately went upstairs to collect your things.

Your meager possessions were few enough to fit into a little drawstring; you'd cast a quick glimpse at the destroyed shirt the man had cut off of you, crumpled on the floor with the rest of your uniform after you'd changed back into your dingy street clothes, before tucking it away into the bag. You weren't sure why. After that, you'd tucked the bag up inside your jacket, calmly walked outside for a "smoke", and kept walking until you made it outside the walls of Freeside, feeling like there were eyes on you the whole way. It was only once you were past the border of the junk fences that you allowed yourself to pause and take a shaky breath.

"You made the right choice." came a familiar drawl from behind you.

The voice startled you, already on edge as you worried about being followed from the casino, sending you freezing in the middle of the decaying road. Through the dusty haze, you could make out his hat and coat, emerging from behind a barricade of concrete, smoke in hand. The big gun was back in its place, slung loosely across his broad shoulders.

"You scared me." you hissed, your hand resting on your flying heart.

He tilted his head at you, those hauntingly beautiful eyes scanning you. He gave a shrug, which was very apparently not an apology.

"Where you headed?" he asked.

"I dunno." you confessed flatly, trying your best to not fidget in place. "Not here."

He took a long, long drag off of his smoke before dropping it into the dirt, stubbing it out with the toe of his boot before looking up at you underneath the brim of that accursed hat. Everything felt very familiar, all of the sudden. Another transaction waiting to happen.

"Quite the coincidence. I'm also headed 'not here'." he replied, quietly assessing you as he leaned against the barricade, lighting another cig.

You hesitated for a moment before responding, considering some things. But eventually, you replied, tone teasing:

"Looking for some company, are you?"

He smirked at you, smoldering cigarette hanging loosely between those vicious teeth.

"Sure am. Interested?"

You crossed the rest of the way over to him, standing close. The smell of leather and gunpowder washed over you once more.

"If you've got the caps, handsome."

[kyokutsu-sama]

So I see your shunsui scenario and raise you, reader who gets super cuddly and happy when drinking. Mayhaps it's the first time they've seen the reader like this? (I can't decide between shunsui and Jushiro for this bc both are good, choose what you like lol)

-@dragon-anon

A/n: @dragon-anon I also couldn't decide which one to write about, but since I used Shunsui in the other work, I thought it would be funny if he and the reader switched roles😅. I hope you like it❤️

You and Shunsui were leaving at the beginning of the night to go out and have a drink. You used to do this sometimes, with him being the one who ended up overdoing it and having to be the one to take him home while he leaned on you, after he got really drunk, to be able to walk properly. You weren't the type to drink as much as he did, but that day was different and you tried to join him in drinking without knowing if you were going to be able to handle it or not.

You both approached the counter to start ordering drinks.

"Are you also going to drink something ?" He asked looking at you

"Yes"

"Do you want sake?"

"Yes"

He then ordered a bottle and a short time later the bartender arrived with the drink, Shunsui opened it and poured both glasses.

"There was no need to order such a big bottle, I don't even drink that much" You said before bringing the glass to your lips

"But I do"He said, swallowing the drink."And I think you should drink a little more today, it's good for relief"He advised

"Only if it's for you"

"No, seriously, you should try"

You looked at him and then at the bottle and considered whether or not you should abuse alcohol a little. You still had a long night ahead and tomorrow was the weekend so why not take advantage?

"Fine, I'll try" You said and he smiled

"Now see if you can handle it"

"Trust me, I shouldn't be that bad when I drink" You said with a confident air

Glass after glass, bottle after bottle, you were already starting to see everything spinning around you, he couldn't contain a few laughs after seeing you getting drunk for the first time. Shunsui was witnessing one of the moments in his life that he thought was impossible. Until after some time he had to ask the bar waiter not to bring any more drinks given your condition, he himself no longer felt sober, but as he had more resistance to alcohol, he was the one who ended up taking you home this time, placing your arm on top of his shoulders so you can walk straight and returning.

"My god, I think I shouldn't have exaggerated, why the hell did I take your advice?" You smiled as he sat you down on the couch and sat next to you

"I warned you that if you couldn't handle it, to stop and you continued drinking. You see, after all, you didn't follow my advice" He said laughing

"I was talking about what you said at the beginning, you said that the drink provided relief and now I see everything spinning"

"Don't you feel relieved?"

"A little, apart from the dizziness, but yes I feel good, a lot" You said, moving a few strands of hair away from his face. "I don't know if it was the alcohol but... you know, I think you should hug me and I think we should hug each other, you know?" You said, getting closer and closer to him

"Do you want a hug?" He frowned

"Yes, please give me a hug" you said almost pouting

"Come here" He said pulling you onto his lap hugging you, putting his arms around you

You placed your head in the crook of his neck, snuggling against him, while his hands roamed through your hair and your back. He was actually surprised to know that you looked so cute when you drank, he gave you a smile as you cuddled against him.

"You give the best hugs in all Seireitei, I love you so much" You said hugging him

"I'm grateful for that Y/n"

"You're so cute, look at you" You said, pulling away a little and squeezing his cheeks before kissing his forehead a few times and hugging him again

Shunsui thought about giving you a dose of compliments too but in the condition you were in, you would probably smother him with kisses until the next day and so he just stayed there with you on his lap and giving you back the affection you were giving him.

After some time kissing and cuddling, he looked at you slightly after a while and since you looked so peaceful, he figured you had fallen asleep on his shoulder and kissed your temple.

"You must be tired, let's go to sleep" He picked you up and took you to the room

He placed you gently on the bed and you seemed to be sleeping so well that you didn't feel anything, he laid down next to you and kissed you one last time before falling asleep.

When you woke up the next day he was sitting right next to you, combing your hair with his fingertips while he watched you open your eyes slightly. Your vision was still a little hazy, but the way his eyes were looking at you made everything seem clear.

"Good morning dear, are you feeling well today?" He said

"My head hurts" You said rubbing your eyes

"It was the drink, it will pass"He leaned over and kissed your forehead

"And you ?"

"I'm fine, just a little tired" He said, getting up from the bed. "You should see yourself when you drink, you're extremely cute and happy"

"Really? I don't remember almost anything" You frowned looking at him seeing him smile at the memories

"Yeah, you even gave me a lot of kisses and hugs, telling me such beautiful things. I think I should take you to drink more often just to see this romantic side of you for me" He laughed and you threw the pillow at him, hitting him on the head

[kairiscorner]

Ok ok I just read your NoirXFlorist and I am so in love. A personal HC I have is that Noir’s giving love language is acts of service and so ⬇️

-Imagine Noir being colorblind, but he wants to help at your shop and since the easiest way to differentiate between flowers is color he learns other ways to tell the difference- scent, texture, size, shape, or just memorizing where a certain type of flower is most often stored, because he wants to help. -Also, if any heavy lifting needs to be done, he rushes to do it before you even get the chance, even if it’s just a box. “No, no, I got it, doll.” “A lady of mine shall not do any heavy work, not while I’m here.”

anon are you trying to kill me with cuteness and fluff.

BC IT'S WORKING OMGGGGG YEAH, NO, I WANNA MAKE A FIC OF THIS, THANK YOU FOR THE IDEA AND FOR SHARING :>

(i wish i could credit you anon, you and your big beautiful brain 😭😭😭🫂🫂 also reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <;:D)

(part 1)

so imagine:

it was a real hectic, busy day at your floral shop; people came flooding into your place more frequently, and while it was good for business, you were completely and utterly overwhelmed.

you managed a small establishment, and business was going well recently, but you were the only one working there, of course a pair of hands and a couple of fast feet can only do so much work.

peter'd have come in all chipper and point out the long line of people coming in, and then he'd see your tired, overworked face still smiling and wrapping up bouquets so darn fast.

he'd be in awe, of course, and fall in love with your hardworking and capable self, but he'd be super concerned as well for you so he'd pull you to the side as the influx of people died down for a bit and ask you with a concerned smile if you were okay.

"dear, you good? looks like you had to run several laps back there." he joked lightheartedly as he put his hands on your shoulders. "i know i'm not exactly the most helpful guy out there for this job, but if it gives you any comfort, i can help. i'm around you and the flowers all the time, i... i kinda got everything down about them." he said in a slightly cocky tone, but of course, it was to impress you with his new confidence since you first met him as a bumbling fool who was head over heels in love with you the moment you showed him just what kind of hidden beauty was lying in wait for him to discover.

you hesitated telling him you were okay and that he didn't have to bother himself to help you, because you were seriously considering getting some help at the very last minute to complete your clients' requests. "well... i'm actually kind of drowning over here, pete. i'm worried i can't do this on my own." you admitted.

peter smiled as he put his hand to your cheek. "don't you worry about a thing, i've got you. i meant it when i said i know everything there is know about the flowers here. i may not be able to tell which flowers are what color, but you of all people know a flower's color isn't the only thing worth nothing." he said with a small wink at you. yes, he'd been practicing that wink, he waited for the right occasion to use it on you.

it made you smile widely as peter agreed to help, and you had a lot of faith in him that he'd be able to ease your burden. you had shown peter the ropes before after work hours, it was another option for a date between you two. you loved how fast he picked up at tying the bouquets together, ringing up change, and memorizing the descriptions of the flowers; it really warmed your heart that he took interest in these things and was determined to show you he could do these things for you if you needed him to.

he got to work immediately, hoping that him having to interact with the customers would come as natural and easy as learning everything there is to know about the flowers; but humans are no flowers, they're significantly much harder to please, so that thought kind of scared him. but you were counting on him, that was all he could think about--you counting on him, you needing him right then and there.

you couldn't believe how different peter seemed when he was talking to the customers, helping them out as you tied up the bouquets. he appeared like a door to door salesman, and you meant that in the nicest way possible.

he seemed more upbeat, cheery, and... you dare say, a lot more charming. you two soon switched shifts, he was on tying and ringing up the bouquets, and you were the one helping out the customers pick flowers.

you were a little worried because you knew peter didn't do so well when having other people wait for him, it sort of intimidated him. you never taught him everything he now knows during work hours, it was just you two--and as pleasant as it was for both of you, you were still concerned how he'd be doing applying that practice in a real scenario.

but lo and behold, peter did it all in a jiffy. he didn't even need to use a calculator or do the math on paper, the minute he saw the flowers, counted them, and took note of other things--he could instantly give them their total, with tax. he was extraordinarily fast, too; he was extremely agile yet delicate with handling the bouquets, they were flowers, after all; they needed room to breathe, a single mistake can end in them being crushed, so of course, he was mindful of that, too.

soon, the day was ending; the sky had red, orange, pink, and purple strewn out over the horizon as the sun set. you and peter just finished up the last round of orders, and the floral shop was nearly empty by the time you were finished.

you both breathed out a breath you both didn't realize you were both holding in this entire time. the two of you laughed since you did it at the exact same time. "thank you for helping, peter. really, i... i don't know what i'd've done without you." you said as you went over behind the counter and stood next to him.

now this is when the shy, flustered peter parker comes back to you. he smiled at you widely and blushed profusely; leading all the way up to the tips of his ears, an innocent and pleasing mix of red and pink dancing on his cheeks.

"it's no biggie." he muttered, trying to sound as confident as he was earlier, but his defenses broke down when he caught you leaning closer to his face, your nose mere inches away from his own. he chuckled. "well... maybe it is kind of a biggie." he said as he put his hands on your arms and rubbed them lightly.

"well, thank you, again, pete." you repeated as you put your hand on the back of his. soon, peter noticed a truck coming by and a man coming down the truck with a clipboard in his hand, a few other men bringing boxes about and laying them by the door of your floral shop.

"oh, wait right here, pete." you said as you went over to talk to the man. peter watched as you signed the papers on the man's clipboard, thanked him, and... they left without helping you carry those boxes!

peter was enraged just the slightest bit as he watched you, your poor, overworked self, carry them into the floral shop without contempt for those men who didn't even bother to help. immediately, peter rushed to your aid, flung the door open, and took the box you were trying to carry away from you and into his arms.

"peter--!" you exclaimed as he took the box with ease. "i've got it, don't worry, really! i've already asked for your help today, this... i got this." you tried telling him, but he refused to listen and took box after box into the floral shop.

he smiled up at you and adjusted his glasses with one hand, carrying a box in his other hand. "no, no, i got it, doll. don't you worry about a thing, a lady of mine shall not do any heavy work, not while i'm here." he said as he flashed you another wink, he was getting better at it, you had to admit.

you blushed at his gallantry and general altruism towards you. you decided to reward him for all his hard work afterwards. he finished carrying the boxes and putting them aside. he turned to look at you as you walked into the floral shop, blushing a bit as you kept admiring how sweet he was towards you and for all his help.

"i really can't thank you enough for today, peter. it's far beyond what i originally asked you to do." you said as you took his hands into your own, and he blushed yet again. "of course. anything for you, my darling." he murmured, still admiring how soft and warm your hands were. you giggled. you opened a box to unveil a flurry of flowers of every kind in it, and you placed a flower behind his ear yet again.

he chuckled. "my, you never get tired of doing that, don't you?" he asks. you shake your head playfully. "it looks beautiful." you remarked. "it does?" he asked, a little joyful at that compliment. "well..." he said as he took a flower from the box that he thought was the prettiest and tucked it behind your ear, too. "i've always wanted to do that. and now... oh goodness, you're a complete and total beauty on your own, and now... oh, call an ambulance, love, i'm having a heart attack!" he said as he leaned over to brush his nose against yours, smiling and chuckling to himself all the while as his eyes stared intently into your own big, beautiful ones.

"i truly, truly love you, dear." he tells you as his lips are just centimeters away from your own. "and i love you, truly, pete." you reply as you close the distance between you two, kissing him as the sun sank down into the horizon--you two greeting the night with a loving kiss shared between you two.

maybe he should come out to help you more often, after all, such is to be done when you're planning to become one's husband, no?

a/n: BUIREBFIUBEVIUBHIUFEHIFIRFRBVIURBVBRVR I LOVED WRITING THIS SM AAAAAA TY AGAIN ANON HOPE YOU LIKE ITTTTT <33

tags !! @thecoolerdor @miguelswifey04 @fictarian @pixqlsin

[cheesus-doodles]

Hello, it's been a while since I visited your blog, as the end of school and the beginning of adulthood have taken up more of my time recently. Nevertheless, I'm glad to revisit your blog and see new posts. It brings back memories of the old days when I was in the tokyo revengers fandom, spending weekends reading the manga and some fanfics on tumblr.

I don't think this question has been asked before, but I've always been curious about the personality of the author. I know there are descriptions in your posts, but I'd love to hear more about it in your own words. It seems more intriguing to me.

I'm not sure when you'll read this or what time it is, but I hope you continue to be as creative as you've been. Your posts motivated me to return to writing and develop my talent in that. ♡︎

hello again anon! welcome back to this little corner of the internet, I'm glad to you thought of here enough to return ^^ ahh the transition from school to workplace is definitely not easy, remember to be kind to yourself! super nice ask, yes I most definitely will keep writing as and when I have time, and I'm super happy to hear that my rants into the abyss have motivated you :) take care of yourself anon!

Also if I'm interpreting this correctly, I think you're asking about the personality of the reader? Do let me know if I'm wrong though, I'll be more than happy to answer any questions you have!

Masterlist

A Friend in Me: Chapters 1 | 2‎ | 3

‎

‎

I have done the personality of Boss from the Red Dragonflies AU here previously, so I'll talk more about the nameless reader from A Friend In Me/Going Home here!

I always imagined reader to be this rather socially awkward and emotionally sensitive individual, yet very friendly and easygoing person. Its not like you don't want to have friends - its not easy being the outcast in school, having to be the one looking in all the time and knowing that you weren't going to be picked for teams during physical education class, having to eat lunch alone. Not because the rest of your classmates and schoolmates hate you per se(before the arrival of your Toman boys and their interferrence, at least), but rather because barely anyone knows you exist.

You have never been very good at putting yourself out there despite wanting to know people and make friends, and when you do, you're always nervous and anxious. And this would lead to you believing that even the mere act of reaching out to others makes you a burden. You can't quite trust others on their word even when they were happy to make friends with you, continuing to think that they're putting on an act out of sympathy for you, and at the end of the day, you're simply troubling them.

Of course your confidence increases by leaps and bounds after meeting your Toman boys and seeing that you are actually capable of being sociable and putting yourself out there, and even after the same delinquents you called friends stripped you of your newfound confidence around your schoolmates, this doesn't deter you from attempting to find your own way in the world, much to the boys' chagrin.

In general, you would also be a pretty carefree and easygoing for the most part, happy to just be included in whatever that is going on. The reader I have in my mind when writing is always up for anything that her boys suggest, and despite your rather quiet nature, your sense of adventure hasn't been lost. Be it motorcycle rides in the middle of the night, or something more gut-sinking like watching the boys spar, you never really said no. And though you said you were okay with it, the Toman founders would try never to pick a fight in front of you - god only knows how you would react and they wouldn't want to have to deal with that.

Most definitely an easily manipulated person, you rely heavily on the emotions of the people around you to try and tell if you are being a good friend and if they liked you enough to keep you around. Which makes you susceptible to being influenced by the merest suggestion of unhappiness or anger at your actions, falling over yourself to correct yourself in a bid to stop that friend from leaving you. Even when you do eventually start to stand up for yourself - e.g. when you have someone to defend - enough pressure usually can still get you to fold like a wet paper towel, and it would be interesting to find out when you will finally draw the line.

It is pretty unfortunate that being the pushover you are is part of the reason why the yandere Toman boys like you so much (because you do whatever they want without complaint and pamper them in return for the bare minimum), so it will be a balancing game to try and prevent temper flaring; these are delinquents that you are dealing with at the end of the day, and even if they would hesitate to turn their fists directly at you, the darling of their world, everyone else around you is free real estate the moment you start misbehaving in their eyes. And boy, it'll be a matter of whether you give in first, or someone dies first.

[lost-in-lamentation]

I'm really sorry if this isn't something usually written or slightly difficult to write, but I was thinking about how the brothers or any of the others would react to a MC who always wears a mask ? Like, they only ever take it off when their by themself and even then they still feel odd without it. So their immediate instinct when going out is to grab their mask !

It can be for any reason ! Body dysmorphia or just general shyness, anything

I deal with this myself, and I often get a lot of weird looks for wearing it since covid is less common now. I just have one preference !

-The MC needing a lot of reassurance and comfort before taking it off [ and even then or after a bit, they need to put it back on ]

To them it may feel like protection and security, so they rely on it a lot !

I'm really sorry if this is too long or hard to read, I'm not used to making requests (╥﹏╥)

a/n: hi anon! i totally get where you're coming from, you're not alone here. and no need for sorry! i'm glad you were so specific with the request, and i hope you find some comfort here! (´ω｀)

see end for more notes.

content: asmodeus and satan are curious as to why you never go out without your face mask. the reasons differ for each brother, please read the warnings before proceeding.

warnings: extreme body dysmorphia, panic attacks (asmodeus); shyness, appearance insecurity (satan).

comfort. satan, asmodeus x gen!reader (you/your). separate.

═  ˎˊ˗

satan.

for satan to be called confused was an understatement. he was beyond baffled that every time you agreed to an outing with him, you grabbed a mask each time from the box that sat atop your desk. if he was going to be honest, he never understood why you refused to go anywhere without one. after a long period of observation, satan realised the only places he saw you without a mask on was in your own room, or at the dining table. the very idea that you hid yourself away sparked his interest, which in return lead to a new period of research. much to his dismay, personal reasons would never show themselves in textbooks. instead, he decided to tackle the source (you) instead.

satan found you in the library, of course, mask on, flipping through the notes you had made during class earlier in the day. with a nod, he slid into the seat across from you, setting his novel down and propping his chin up against his palm. the way your eyes widened slightly didn't go unnoticed by him. neither did the way you pinched your mask and brought it higher up the bridge of your nose. behind the covering, you grimaced to yourself before clearing your throat awkwardly.

"is something the matter?" you asked softly, placing your notes onto the desk.

satan tapped his index finger just underneath his jawline. "why do you wear it everywhere?"

"... come again?"

"the mask," he said plainly. "don't you get tired of wearing it everywhere? i've read that some humans even complain because it gets hard to breathe."

you made a quiet sound of acknowledgement. "i just like wearing it."

"you're not a very good liar, MC."

a defeated sigh escaped past your lips. "promise not to tell?" after a nod from the demon, you steeled yourself to explain. "it's kind of dumb, honestly. i just get really shy when i don't have it on." at your words, satan sat himself upright, keeping his gaze trained on yours. "having it on makes it easier to talk to everyone. i'm not super good-looking, you know? so... i feel a bit more confident when i'm wearing it."

satan once again found himself far beyond confused. baffled, yes. perhaps, even dumbfounded might actually be the word he was looking for in this situation. his mouth parted slightly, and his hand slowly reached out to you, stopping at the side of your face. "you can practice talking without it on with me," he spoke in a tone that he reserved solely for you. "may i?"

you blinked at him rapidly, eyes darting around the room before landing on his. swallowing nervously, you finally nodded, your shoulders tensing when satan unhooked the mask from behind your ear. when it fell away from your face, you snapped your head to the side, feeling the heat run up your cheeks and turn into a blush. "would you look at that," satan purred.

"what?"

"you're actually very attractive."

"satan! you can't just say that!" your face felt like it was on fire. flustered, you scrambled to loop the mask around your ear once more, but the blush on your cheeks had already spread down to your neck. there was a beat of silence, and then a cough from you as you shifted in your seat to face anywhere but satan. "but, if you're willing," you whispered, shooting him a a smile from behind the mask, "i'd like to take you up on that offer."

knowledge was a wonderful thing. satan could never get enough of it. but when compared to the feeling he got when you relied on him, satan would rank knowledge as second. if satan could eventually have you get comfortable enough to go around without the mask, he'd see more of that smile he's craved since the first time he saw it.

═  ˎˊ˗

asmodeus.

"MC!!" the voice echoed throughout the hallways directly into the classroom you were studying in. you turned your head towards the doorway to see the fifth born practically skip inside, coming to a stop in front of your seat. "i didn't get to show you the new lip tint i got this morning!"

you released a sigh, letting your pen fall from your fingers. "asmo, can this wait until we get home?"

"nonsense! it's the best time of day to try it out. come on!" you couldn't help thinking that all you wanted was to be left alone to do your homework, but all your thoughts came to a halt when asmodeus broke your one rule. within seconds, your mask had come off and was only hanging off one ear. unwillingly, you shrieked and pushed yourself away from the demon, his words falling on deaf ears as you fumbled to put your mask back on. with tears in your eyes, you burst out of the classroom, all your belongings forgotten as you tried to return to your only safe space; your room.

as you returned to your room, the fear and disgust overtook you all at once. you slammed your door with a cry, fingers digging into your scalp as your back collided against the wall. in the corner of your eye, you caught a glimpse of your reflection. the hand mirror that had been so carefully placed on your desk showed you the mess that you were. disheveled and erratic, you stared at yourself, the mask doing nothing to hide what you were. in a daze, you grabbed it from the desk and threw it against the wall, watching as it shattered into pieces. you felt your knees give out from underneath soon after, and you crashed to floor in a heap. it felt like hours had passed before a hand tentatively came to rub your back soothingly.

you scrambled away from the touch, chest heaving as you tried to clear your vision. when you did, you saw the fifth born again, this time wearing a regretful expression. "MC, it's me. i..." his voice trailed away as he looked at you. "i cleaned up the broken mirror for you," he whispered. "and... i'm sorry."

your hands trembled at your sides, balled tightly into fists. "sorry for what?" the question sounded more like an interrogation, but you couldn't be bothered to watch your tone.

asmodeus looked at you sadly, his expression crestfallen. "i knew you didn't like having your mask off, but... i never expected you to freak out like that either."

"oh, so you're just calling me a freak now?!"

"no- that's not what i mean!" he inhaled sharply, internally scolding himself for not being the best with words. "let me rephrase," asmodeus began softly, his thumbs twiddling nervously. "i'm sorry for taking your mask off. i didn't know that it would affect you that much."

at the sight you of starting to relax, asmodeus felt the tension in his shoulders begin to slip away. you glanced at where the shards of the mirror should have been. "... i see myself in the mirror, and i see something i don't want to be," you admitted. it took every effort for asmodeus to not interrupt with a shallow sounding comment. "i wear a mask so that i don't have to see myself. so that no one else has to see me."

carefully, asmodeus shuffled closer to you, settling himself a few feet away. "i have some experience with that," he confessed to you. relief bubbled inside his chest when he saw you turn to make eye contact with him. "becoming a demon wasn't easy," he continued on, a bitter look gracing his face. "but maybe it'll help me help you with this. what do you say?"

"i don't know if i'm ready for that." you replied hesitantly, staring at the floor instead of him now. "but when i am ready, will you still be willing to help me?"

the smile on his face managed to lift your mood too. "i'll always be ready to help you," he promised, holding a hand out with only his pinky extended. you mirrored his gesture from where you sat, curling your pinky around thin air. asmodeus wasn't sitting close by, but you could feel his sincerity from miles away.

a/n: i was gonna have three chars originally but.. i kinda liked how these two went and couldn't think of a good situation for the third. anon i hope this finds you well!

reblogs are really appreciated (´ω｀) ♡

[nikos-oneshots]

hello HELLO guess who's back and is into monster prom now.

could i have some headcanons for calculester with a friend who struggles in school?

:D - 🪐

Calculester & Reader who Struggles in School.

Warnings: No beta we die like everybody in the z'gord ending ✌️ Word Count: 0.6k Pronouns: None Notes: I COMPLETELY FORGOT THIS SAID HEADCANONS UNTIL I WENT BACK TO POST THIS!! D: I'M SORRY ANON!! If you want me to remake this, then I will! Note 2: ALSO IM SO GLAD YOUR INTO MONSTER PROM ANON!! I love monster prom so much so i'm always happy to do requests for it!! I hope you enjoy!

Calculester Hewlett-Packard does really well in school. He has the internet as his brain, everything known by man at his fingertips. I wouldn’t assume he talks about school much because he knows he has a huge advantage over everybody else and doesn’t want to upset people by telling them that he has straight A’s in most of his classes. This rule especially applies to you, Cal knows that you don’t do the best in school. Whether you are a person who tries super hard and still doesn’t make it that far or decides to skip class multiple times a week, I would imagine Calculester would be clueless about your struggles.

I would think that he would only notice after midterms.

Everybody is sharing their scores. Liam is subtly bragging about how he got the highest in the school, Polly is super excited to show everybody that she got a 69 and Scott is relieved that he just did good enough to stay on the football team. You on the other hand, aren’t really happy about your score, you did your best, or maybe you didn’t, point is, you got a 20. Cal comes up to you asking about your score, you were hesitant to show him, but after he showed you his score of 89, you showed him your score.

“Oh, dear Friend Y/N. Not to alarm you, but that has been the lowest score I have seen yet. I apologize for your test failure.”

You look down in shame, you thought at least somebody would have done worse.

“I notice your struggles now Friend Y/N. If you are open to the idea, I could teach you what I know, like tutoring. Your problem may be that the strategies the professors here use aren’t effective for you to learn from. What do you say?”

You decide to take him up on his offer and once you begin your first session at the library. Calculester proves himself to be a great teacher, he knows how to tailor the way he teaches to match your learning style. You get through worksheets faster and actually begin learning the material. Along with potentially turning your marks around, you also begin to connect with Calculester more than you have already before! As you get him to talk about himself during your breaks, you learn about the way he also tutors Scott and how much of a struggle it was. You learned that even though he is a sentient computer, he still has so much he still needs to learn about interacting with others. You also learn a couple new plant facts!

When your next big test came up for your science class a couple months later, you went into it with a newfound confidence, an attitude completely different from your usual one. Calculester wished you luck, he was confident you would do amazingly, but deeper down, he was nervous for you. He dreaded the possibility that you come back with a terrible score again, he was scared that you would lose faith in him as a teacher and along with that, your trust; He could have sworn he was about to malfunction with how worried he was for you.

As you received your scores a week later, you instantly go to find Cal to show him your score. You try to hide the smile on your face, but you can’t as you give him your paper marked with a large 79 at the top. Relief washed over him and pulled you into a hug. He was so glad he was able to help you, both of your hard work paid off and he was glad that you had managed to achieve your goal with his help, validating his ability as a tutor. As the bell rang, you guys walked to your next class together. As you guys passed his classroom, you shouted to him as he was going to walk in.

“See you after school for our study session!”

Lots of Love -Niko

[pacific-rimbaud]

(this is not to fix or invalidate how you feel at all!!) but my jaw dropped seeing that there were hate threads?? on the dramione reddit i see laoha constantly mentioned in a "what will fill this laoha shaped hole after finishing", "where else can i find platinum tier banter like this" way and not one bad word to say. i'm so sorry to hear there was hate and that it affected you, your writing comes across so confident and well-seasoned but ofc you're human too. keep on rockin pac!! we ADORE you!!

Oh, geez. Fandom-ancient discourse under the cut.

For anyone who's newish, back when laoha was publishing (end of 2019 to end of 2021) it was a thing on Facebook and Reddit to have several threads a week soliciting negative comments about specific fics. It was often phrased as a question like, "Which fic did you DNF and why?" or "What turns you off of a fic?" but sometimes it was more like, "I hated [whatever fic], does anyone else feel the same way?" And then people would proceed to drag the shit out of works and writers. I was by NO MEANS the only person impacted, although I may have had the highest ratio of hate to actual readership. Writers made it super clear that it was hurtful, that they no longer felt able to participate in fandom spaces because of the negativity, entitlement and cruelty, and people would tell them to grow a tougher skin. I mostly stayed out of it at the time, because discourse is always awful and pointless and I'm a pretty small potato in a spectacularly huge fandom. Also, it's the internet, and effective moderation is hard work. Thankfully Reddit made the decision to ban those threads, and hopefully it's become a more welcoming community as a result. Which is really my entire point. There is a human being behind every single fic a reader encounters, whether it's the top-fic-by-kudos masterpiece that nothing will ever equal or a palate cleansing speed read or whatever. Overwhelmingly those people are also readers who often want to engage in the community aspect of fandom. At that time, human beings who wrote for fun in their free time were going . . . this is incredibly hurtful, please stop, and some readers were effectively saying, on a constant basis, fuck you, shut up and give me more 100k+ fic written exactly to my personal tastes. Publishing my wildly uneven first-ever novel-length work with an unpopular Hermione in that climate was not a great experience for me, and it took its toll. Enough time has passed that I've mostly been able to sift through, take what helps me and leave the rest. Like: I will NEVER write miscommunication again! I'm also SO grateful to hear that some communities have chosen to take responsibility for shaping not just the tone but the values of their spaces. It was the right thing to do and too long in coming. Hopefully new DHr writers feel embraced and supported if they choose to engage in fandom social media. It should be fun. I honestly don't know what any of us are doing here if it's not.

That is not what you asked for, anon, but there you have it: ancient discourse that I hope has become irrelevant. I'm so glad to hear people are being kind!

[iloveyou-writers]

~~Tips On~~ Making Friends [Online]

Making friends serves to be something so many struggle with. Whether it be social anxiety, shyness, introversion, or just generally not enjoying the act of reaching out to others, there are a lot of obstacles that can hold us back from being able to make the connections possible for making true and lasting friendships.

Below, I will list some things that have worked for me, as someone with social anxiety and issues with keeping in touch with people I've connected with.

**Disclaimer: these will not work for everyone and this is not an exhaustive list of all the ways you can make/maintain new friendships online.

Tip #1: Think about how much you love to be reached out to. I know it can be easy to fall into the mindset of "I don't want to annoy them," but even big bloggers that receive hundreds of asks a day usually still love receiving them. Yes, sometimes answering all those asks can feel like a chore, but it is better than getting no engagement. Receiving correspondence from those that follow you is exciting and it lets you know that your [writing, art, whatever] reached an audience that cares enough to speak up, which can be super encouraging, even if you reaching out is more social than commenting directly on whatever they make.

Tip #2: Remember that the other person is human too. If they don't respond right away, remember they have a life offline as well as the one here. They may be at work or school. They may be sleeping or having a meal. They may be grocery shopping. They have a life outside the internet, so patience is key to maintaining a healthy relationship with someone online (or really anywhere).

Tip #3: Communication is such an important thing, no matter what the relationship. Letting someone know that you're interested in building a friendship can let them know what your intentions are, if you're just casually striking up conversation or if you actually want a lasting friendship where they will hear from you time and again.

Tip #4: Showing interest in their passions is SUCH A HUGE WAY to make friends. They're part of a fandom you've never heard of? Ask them about it! They're starting a new project that you're curious about? Ask them about it! They started talking about a person they're starting to have interest in? Encourage them in it! Showing that you have interest in their passions can be such a great way to connect and bond with another person.

Tip #5: Showing that you care in hard times is a very fast way to bond with someone. When someone talks about a rough time they're having, instead of having a "what does this have to do with me" attitude, and instead reaching out and simply saying "I hope you feel better soon" can make such a difference in some circumstances. You don't even have to say anything more than just showing sympathy and that you care about what they're going through. Not everyone feels sympathy or empathy, and this is by not means a requirement to make lasting and meaningful relationships, so please don't feel like I'm saying that anyone that doesn't do this isn't a good friend, as that certainly is not the case.

Tip #6: Reaching out - even anonymously - and showing an interest in them can be great! Ask them about their day or their favorites. When they post ask games, send in asks for it, even if silly. Give yourself a cute little nickname or emoji sign off so they know it's you when you come into their inbox and you can build a bond, even while you're anonymous. Eventually, you may feel confident enough to come off anon.

Basically, what a friendship boils down to is genuine care and bonding with another person. You can do that in whatever way fits your love language, that you feel you can make that connection, but these are just a few of the ways I have done it.

Thank you to the anonymous asker that sent me an ask on @writeblrsvoid asking about this. I hope this post helps you.

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

This is sooo long, I hope you won't think I'm crazy :) sorry for any mistakes 💺 anon

1) Started doing some yoga at home in my spare time (in grey sweatpants because it's hotter) and it got me thinking, he'd love watching you do your thing, actually he might even help.

2) So we all agree that he's very observant and if he sees that something catches your eye he will buy it for you. So window shopping with him would be impossible!! You'll also have to explain to him that just because you like how a dress looks, it doesn't mean you want to buy it.

3) While on the topic of buying something, we change things up and buy him a bouquet of flowers? He's all "Oh thank you darlin" smiling and trying to keep his cool but inside he's screaming because his lover?? got him?? flowers??

4) Neck kisses!! He loves giving them to you: lazily laying in bed? Neck kisses. Not paying attention to him? Neck kisses. Taking a bath? Neck kisses. Just imagine his lips, slowly leaving a trail of kisses all over your neck, he's in no rush.

5) How do you think he'll act if one of his mission takes longer than promised? And it's not like a week or something, but 2 MONTHS. I feel like he'd definitely get more agitated and snap more often than usual. And when he finally gets home? He's all over you.

6) Plus, since we're talking about missions and being easily agitated,... sending him some photos? Not revealing too much but just enough to make his pants feel tighter. Add a "Sitting here, unkissed." comment and you're in for a ride once he gets back.

7) I noticed I don't write his full codename but I really just like Tan. He also gets used to you calling him Tan/Tang so one day you hit him with the "What page are you at, Tangerine?" he'll stare at you like :O

8) You said he makes heart eyes at his lover, could you describe more on what his gaze looks like? (I love 'soft for his girl only' men)

9) ALSO the 'says he's not thirsty when you need to pee' post made me cry bricks that's SO HIM!! But like how would you even react to that? I think I'll just look at him in disbelief.

Assassin!reader 1) First I want to say if I was on that train and saw him tossing that cig on the ground he'll def get an earful from me. Anyway,

2) Reader getting injured while on a mission, like she got stabbed. The moment he hears her scream, Tan is grabbing the guy by the hair, throwing him on the floor and starts beating the shit out of him. (hot)

3) Speaking of getting injured, if reader ever gets hurt beacuse of his occupation (someone wanted to get back at him) he wouldn't know what to do with himself. He'll never forget himself if something targeted towards him happened to harm you instead. There are times where he thinks it would be best to break up to keep you safe (noo baby :(( )

4) I'm always talking about badass reader but what if she actually starts panicking? We found the son dead and realize we're screwed so he has to calm us down. (It will never not be funny to me how he was losing his shit over the briefcase but couldn't be bothered to care about WD's dead son)

+ platonic lem (shoutout to my boy) 1) Ok don't get me wrong, he's the ultimate hypeman and wingman, but imagine he's so fed up seeing his brother not making any moves that he just tells us to "please date his sorry ass"

2) Picking his side in arguments? Tan is confident we'll agree with him when the three of us bicker over something silly, only for us to side with Lem because when has he been wrong? This leads to some funny replies and Tan's overdramatic ass.

3) Giving him a handmade gift? Like a wood comb in the form of a slice of lemon and we painted it to make it look like one? He'd be like a child on christmas day.

OR just imagine for a second that there's this super rare Thomas figurine and we break bones just to get it for him (kidding)

4) You said a while back that Tan isn't the type to ask philosophical questions but Lem would just for fun (and to annoy). We're getting into some deep conversations while on a 2 hour train ride to pass time (and to annoy :))

5) Playing phasmophobia with them?? I say that because it's a horror game and we're screaming our lungs out but really any team work game would lead into chaos. God forbid it's something else like monopoly or uno. (And if we also add Ladybug? The house is down)

Mini playlist (these are some songs taken from my playlist of him) Pretty old man by No Buses ; Next 2 U by Ego Apartment ; All night by Men I Trust ; Let's skip to the wedding by Eyedress ; Messages from the stars by The Ruh Band ; Air by Men I Trust ; Head over heels by Tears For Fears.

would never think such thing and apologies for any mistakes on my behalf, I wrote this on my phone 💌

1- grey is honestly the way to go!! and YES YES YES!!! like you could be doing it in the living room and he’d insist on staying. pretending he’s watching the tv, but we all know he’s not

2- 😭😭 yes!! would have to reiterate many times that just bc you looked at it for 3 seconds doesn’t mean you actually want it. don’t think he understands that. “you looked at it, so you want it, right?” and you’d be like “no, it’s a cute pattern but I wouldn’t wear it”

3- AAAAH YES!? he deserves flowers too, he’s just an angelic cutie. I want him to keep the petals and use them for something special… FOR FLOWER GIRLS WHEN YOU GET MARRIED (probably won’t, but uhm I want him to, so that’s enough)

4- and why would you put that thought in my head??? hm? can’t stop thinking about it 🥴 and standing behind you doing it when you do stuff around the house🫠

5- he would get SOOO riled up and irritated. and 2 months ???? oh he’d loose the plot. he’d be snapping at lem, being a right dick just bc he wants to get home. he’d be texting you apologies constantly, telling you how sorry he is and how he’ll make it up to you when he’s home

6- so naughty, I love it !! like a picture of the shoes you’re wearing but it’s really just showing off your thighs. and he gets so flustered (jut bc he’s so frustrated and it’s been a long time) and texts you back a few mins later … wink. talking of pictures… would it be gross to say how he sends a pic of his hand after (🥴) and we tease him for it

7- me too!! I call him tan all the time, I think it’s cute tbh. he probs think he’s in trouble or done something wrong if said tangerine

8- right so! I think he’d have the side of his head resting on his fist and he’s watching you talk to someone (lem, a friend, idk, anyone) and it would be the slightest change and they’d gradually get softer. brows would curl upwards in the middle ever so slightly !!! you wouldn’t be able to notice but the change would be stark once he relaxes his face/ snaps out of it. his pupils would widen bc I say so

9- 😭😭😭😭 im thinking we’ll just stare at him quizzically, mouth open as if to say something, but nothing comes out bc how do you even respond 😭 ?? maybe make a hum and tap his legs as you get up to go pee, saying “right” or “okay then”

assassin reader

1- that whole scene ????????? the way he flicks it ??????? 🫠🫠 fuck me

2- oh my god, yeah!!? he’d enter a zone and wouldn’t hear anything anyone else is saying

3- he’d NEVER EVER EVER forgive himself EVER!!! he’d definitely push you away and try to call it quits so that he doesn’t get you killed. he would rather lose you temporarily than forever (although he wouldn’t even want to do that)

4- I feel like the moment you have a freak out, everyone else does. like if you’re losing your mind????? yeah everyone is gonna start panickin

platonic lem

1- he’d get so fed up. the hints he’s dropping between you isn’t enough so he just has to interject himself. I imagine him grabbing you both by the wrists and holding you both in front. saying “ask each other out. I can’t take it anymore”

2- 😭😭😭😭 yes!! he just assumes you’d have his corner (you do most times!! if not all) but not this time and he’d be so wounded ??? (and you’re right, lem is never wrong) I imagine tan saying “that’s it, I don’t love you anymore” or “who even are you?” or “you’re picking that nob over me?”

3- wtf that’s so thoughtful and creative??????????? actually melting!! he’d honestly cherish the shit out of it!!

4- yes yes yes to your scenario. and lem def would !!! especially when it’s time to sleep and you’re all in the same hotel room and it’s late and you’re tired and he perches up from his pillow like “do you reckon we live in a matrix?” and tans like “shut the fuck up” and buries his head in the pillow and then you make it worse by saying “ive always wondered that. what about the truman show?” and lem perks up even more and says “you know, ive never actually seen that. is it any good?” and we’d be like “yes, you should watch it. we can when get back home” he’d reply “is it on netlix?” and tans grumbles get increasingly louder and just to annoy him more, we’d say “god, what’s his problem? if he’s tired he should just go to sleep” and lem would laugh hard, resulting in a punch from tan. and tan would get up and be like “gonna go for a piss and a fag. you’re both getting on my tits”

5- I answered an ask like that a while back and you’re so right. would be utter chaos and you’d all fall out

you have just good music taste!! and they suit him very well

as always, I love your ideas!! they’re just mwah

[rebornologist]

Hi! Im unsure if you could line in for the day your requests open but I just fell in love with your writing and the way you depict the characters. I just wanted to shoot my shot and ask if you could write your take or headcanons on what Tsuna would be in love? Anyways I hope you have a nice day!!!

Omg hiii Anon!! These took a hot minute but I'm so excited to share these noww because writing these up had me all smiley and happy that Tsuna exists :')

♡ Sawada Tsunayoshi in Love ✧

༚✧⁺˳₊˚‿︵‿︵‿୨୧ ⁺˳₊ ♡ ₊˳⁺ ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿˚₊˳⁺✧༚

Initially a flustered mess, you’ve seen how he is with his middle schooler crush on Kyoko.

Tsuna has never had great self esteem, which is super interesting when combined with his really good people skills?! He’s extremely intuitive and able to pick up on people’s intentions and get a general read of them really easily, but he gets stuck in his head with the “what if they don’t actually like me? I’m misreading..” thought loop.

In love and in a romantic relationship, he curbs some of that thinking with time and experience in knowing his partner. If there’s anything that he can and will believe in, it is his partner’s words and actions, the way that they actively express their love for him and seek out his time and attention.

He also knows deep down that he values them so so so much, and he learns to be fairly at peace with knowing that no matter what, he will do his best to treasure them and be good to them. He would become most frustrated with a partner that behaves recklessly, or is dismissive of/not understanding of his expressions of love and devotion, especially because he does not make particularly grand gestures of love.

Tsuna is not perfect, even when he’s older. He will slip up in his communication and miss scheduled quality time with his partner every once in a while, mostly because he has a lot on his plate and gets super busy and easily overwhelmed. He makes a very active effort to keep in touch with his s/o because I think when he’s in love with someone, they’re 100% also his closest friend and confidant. He bonds with people well over shared vulnerability and life experiences together.

His love is most expressed in how patient he is with a partner, how consistently he is there for them (even more than for himself, sometimes), how supportive and protective he is, and how much he just enjoys their company! He’s not a great gift giver, he’ll perform acts of service for his s/o if they really ask him to, but usually doesn’t go out of his way to do so and is uncharacteristically blunt with saying no when he feels unable to do a task for them. It might sound like he’s being dismissive, but he is just being his most honest self with them. When he isn’t as close to someone, he’s more likely to be a people pleaser and promise something that he knows he cannot fulfill, and he would hate to do that to his loved ones.

He’s not particularly touchy but will really appreciate small gestures of PDA such as hand holding and little kisses. It’s really easy to make him blush with that because he’s such a puppy boy.. It's like, if he had a tail, it would be wagging.

His words of reassurance are the best. He’s not an impressive speaker, but everything that he says comes from the heart, especially the ones that are emotionally charged. He feels his feelings quite deeply, and that might be one of the things his partner loves about him: that being sensitive to their needs comes pretty naturally to him, and he learns to be very patient with people and have a lot of hope in them, especially when he knows how great they are deep down.

bonus song that makes me think of loving Tsuna: he's the type to be content with just doing laundry and taxes with his loves ♡

[undercoverpena]

Hi there! 😊 I came across your comment regarding reblogging while dealing with social anxiety, and it got me thinking. I want to make sure I approach things correctly, especially considering the significance of reblogs for gif makers and writers. I hope it's alright to reach out and ask for some guidance?

omg of courseeee it's okay! (i've actually added a little inbox is open for chats thing to my masterlist so never fear, if that says open, we are gravy). anyway, let's give this a go.

although, firstly, i just want to preface this i am not an expert, this is just how i dealt with the early "reblog" panic.

so, you are right, reblogs are important. not just because of the algorithm, spreading the work etc etc etc, but also because it means you get to interact with the gifmaker/writer! (yay!). and for me, initiating that one-on-one contact is intimidating. but, one of the ways i first began to interact was through reblogs.

so, nowadays, i leave comments as part of the reblog. not just to say that i loved the story, but why. and the why is so important. why?(hehe) because that's personal to you.

you, you wonderful person.

no one can take that from you. not everyone is going to think as beautifully as you. you own that thought. and also you can't be wrong as to why you liked something. because that's your opinion (which is awesome in itself).

now when you're starting out reblogging it can feel super daunting to think up a comment, so when i started, i began in the hashtags (for some reason, this felt less scary? im not sure why, but it works).

i think earlier i said you could always start with "love this", but you could always add more (in my case, i get more and more unhinged).

for example, you could go:

#love this #X was written so well #my favourite trope #reread material ⬆️ btw, these are just examples, you dont have to use them

now the benefits of doing this are, yes, you are reblogging the work, therefore exposing it to others (and showcasing why you loved it to them). but, anon, you're also opening a dialogue with the gifmaker/writer. and they will notice (in my case, i do a little kick when i read them, true story).

while this doesn't mean automatic friendship, you are interacting. and look, there's also a chance they'll interact back. regardless if that happens, you have shared work (yay!) and you've likely made their day (and for us, socially anxious folk, also showed your brain whats what).

then, in time, when you grow more confident, you can experiment with moving from hashtags to comments (if you want). equally, your experience and comfort matter here, you don't have to use the hashtags at all, you could reblog and keep them generic like #frankie morales x reader (for example) at first.

i know from personal experience, sometimes i am staring at my reblog comment of someone else's work and i'm not sure WHAT to say. but then i remember talking to someone about a book and i just began explaining WHY i liked the book, and realised (in one of those weirdly earth-shattering moments) that is all i need to do when i reblog. i am just sharing out loud what it was about the thing that made me grin.

now, i will say, unless specified by the author/maker, do not give constructive criticism or point out things you didn't like in a reblog (especially if you don't know the person). just because without "tone", it can feel really impersonal and hurtful.

but other than that, have fun! fandom is only a beautiful place if those participating are having fun.

i hope this was helpful, in some capacity. love jo 🩷✨

[threehuskiesinatrenchcoat]

Hello there, it’s me again, meow. I know this is like the third anon message, but I had a thought and I wanted to your opinion on it.

How much Spanish do you think Graves knows? He’s southern, sure, but that’s not a real reason to know Spanish. Imo, he might know a few words and phrases from Spanish class or something, but not a lot.

You know what would be real cute? If Alejandro tried teaching him some. Just Graves trying his best and Alejandro honestly getting a bit frustrated with him, because "C‘mon mi amor, it’s not that hard to pronounce!" (but never actually mad bc my heart couldn’t take that rn).

Maybe Graves knows Spanish and is messing with Alejandro, maybe he really is hopeless at it and secretly tries to practice to surprise him with it.

Any thoughts? I hope you liked this bird as well! It’s super fun reading the responses to my little brain gremlins c:

hi again!! i enjoy your messages so much and it's super fun discussing ideas with you! im really giddy every time i get an ask and i see that it's you, i know to expect something good. i cherish every bird you bring here lol

god alejandro teaching graves spanish has so much potential :') the idea of alejandro, who gives me this restless irritable vibe, trying to be patient with him is incredibly funny and cute to me.

(alejandro, super tired of trying to teach him proper pronounciation and the meaning of this new phrase: (swears quietly)

graves: oh well i know what that one means)

and also him being so proud of his bf when he gets noticeably better :'

but i also had this idea for a long time that i wanted to share: what if graves like. knows spanish really well, his accent is just atrocious. so he doesn't speak much purely because it's usually a mess when he tries, but he understands it really well (just can't replicate the pronounciation). so people kinda assume that he doesn't know much of the language. and lower their guard because they think he doesn't understand. but he does and it's such a perfect opportunity to collect blackmail. i mean it could be a potential for some serious idea but i'm in a lighthearted mood rn so i imagine something like, people talking some juicy gossip fully confident that he doesn't understand them even though he's in range of their conversation, and he just quietly snickers to himself. and like maybe he tries to practice in the meantime, and one day alejandro talks to someone about him and he chimes in on the conversation just because he's a little shit. or like they go out somewhere and he just nonchalantly talks to someone in spanish and alejandro just stands there gaping like a fish, not sure what to even say lol. you've known spanish ALL THIS TIME and you didn't TELL ME i thought we were done with the betrayals!!!!

also i kinda think rudy would be in on it. like i feel like he absolutely would catch this little game in the early stages

(rudy: (asks graves something in spanish)

graves, busy and distracted: (answers in english)

graves:

rudy: BUSTED. THOUGHT NO ONE WOULD NOTICE HUH)

but he finds it funny so he just waits to see how long it would take for alejandro to notice. he could be the person graves practices with, too. i overall feel like they would strike up a friendship at some point, you know.

(alejandro would be dramatically devastated like even my best friend was in on it can't trust anyone anymore what a cruel world :''''''' )

[wyn-n-tonic]

Your Slow Turning Pain

Pairing: Santiago Garcia x f!reader Word Count: 1.6k+ Warnings: Mental illness talk but never really fully defined. Like... the tiniest pinch of Daddy kink (used by Santiago, not reader). Author's Note: Anon, I love you and I'm over the moon that you came to me with your request and super super super grateful you came back to answer some questions and trust me with these parts of yourself to help me make this. I really hope that it lives up to what your expectations. I'm already thinking of a part two.

Masterlist

Ghostly.

Unseen, unheard.

Full of so much sadness and hurt but not enough to fuel the strength to actually move or be moved.

There’s a passivity to your presence, your contributions. Say something and the subject changes or it’s repeated louder by another down the line. No pats on the back for the work you’ve put in or how far you’ve come. Sometimes there are quiet nods of understanding; small, whispered conversations away from prying eyes who may see and silently judge. Because, God forbid, you may be contagious.

The only time that does change is on your bad days. The greasy hair; the wrinkled clothes; the less and less make up that adorns your features. It’s enough to be seen, to move. 

The pain weighs so much more than the happiness.

Everybody turns to the flat voice and the tired eyes. Comment on it or ask about it; Why do you only ever focus on the negative? They ask why there is sadness and how, exactly, you can be. Drop their voices low and ask if everything’s okay at home.

“I don’t know, Santiago,” you breathe out, “sometimes I feel like I only matter when I’m falling apart.”

He’s shaking his head, back turned to you as he focuses on dinner for tonight. You trade off on good days and bad days, switching the duties based on energy levels determined by chronic pain and the chemistry of your brains.

Words come out of his mouth, ones that are meant to be comforting; validating; affirming. They fall flat and he knows it. He knows it because you’ve heard it all before. He knows it because he’s said it all, you’ve said it all. That doesn’t take away the hurt of it all in the moment. Because when you’re in it, you don’t see it for what it is—and you never will because you’re always in it.

“I hate that you care so much,” he bites out. “I know that it’s unfair for me to when I go through the same goddamn thing but”—he runs a hand down his heat flushed face as he turns from the stove—“I wish neither of us had to, I wish neither of us had these broken fucking brains.”

Some group therapy bullshit brought you together, a half assed performance that felt more like it was preparing you for a future of addiction than being a place of healing. In fact, the facilitator all but said he expected half the group to end up in Alcohol Anonymous or its counterpart for narcotics—or both. Your therapists had suggested it, which was usually what put new butts in those hard plastic sheets, but there was something about Santi that took you from the moment he sat directly across in that wide circle—always going around and growing but never going forward.

It took a few weeks, getting to know each other through the vague answers of general feelings you gave in response to the questions you were asked over and over until your turn ended and another’s began.

“You know it’s not just your fight right?” He asks, body draped over yours now that he’s closed the distance. 

You never had to be weighted down with all of it to be seen, never had to be full of too much to move him or be moved by him. To Santiago, you never had to be anything but what you were from moment to moment. He weathered it all, he loved it all; he broke for and cared for with confidence that it wasn’t one-sided. 

It took some getting used to, every part of your routine built around self-preservation and self-sufficiency. The first time he called himself daddy, said you could tell him anything and he’d take care of it, your whole brain short-circuited and all he was met with was a twisted face that made him think it was all over before it started.

Turns out, support groups weren’t supporting either of you—you just kept coming for one another.

“Come on,” he continues, the teasing heavy in his voice as he starts to press kiss after kiss into your cheeks; your lips; your neck. “Tell daddy what it really is today, let him make it all better.” Big hands slide up your bare upper arms, rough palms scratching like sandpaper against your skin. Sometimes you wonder how the lotion he so meticulously massages into you every night hasn’t taken away these calluses. Selfishly, you’re glad that it hasn’t.

“It doesn’t fucking matter in the long run, Santi,” you give up against his lips. “I’ll get bored and move on again, it’s not a big deal.”

He tells you it matters because it hurts you, it’s a big deal because it hurts you.

You’ve never exactly been a job hopper, just going with circumstance from one place to the next. But Santi came along like a true devil on your shoulder. Go where it benefits you and leave when it no longer does. He stopped that kind of speaking when you asked if that’s how he felt about you. Now he only encourages you to take care of yourself and he’ll follow where that thinking leads—fill the gap that it leaves.

“Why don’t you move on now, sweetheart? Huh?” He bends his knees between yours to keep eye contact, that big, brown gaze boring right into you. “Your savings is built up, you don’t even have to work ever again if you don’t want to.” 

You don’t, that’s what he keeps saying. Keeps telling you that you’re wearing heart and your mask thin for nothing but your own pride. He says he’ll take care of you, he says it’s okay. He knows what’s holding you back though, he knows the fear you have over becoming reliant on somebody else when you’ve already put away so many reservations as it is.

“Tell daddy what it is, tell daddy what it is,” he says over and over again, your smile widening alongside his with every push of his lips into your skin. “There's something bothering you in that big, beautiful brain of yours. Let’s go. Tell me, tell me. Dinner’s simmering and I wanna get to dessert.” 

God, he’s fucking annoying and you love him so much.

You got close so quickly, dinner after group turned into meeting together instead of group. Turns out the suggestion to join at all came from a worry of loneliness for the both of us. For him, he came home from bootlicking bullshit—as he calls it—a lot later than his friends; they’d already been on their healing journeys and they’d done so together. Santiago feared his bullshit would pull them back and so he sought out support elsewhere to leave their progress in tact. 

For you, just having moved and trying to start all over, you had no support. Your therapist thought that would be the place to build it. She was right on some level. Moved in together not long after dating started.

It all just seemed to click.

“I don’t know, Tiago, baby, I-I”—your head shakes as you try to find the words—“remember how you said once that you feel like you’re a guest star in Benny’s and Will's and Frankie’s lives?”

He nods, lip bitten. “Is that how you feel?”

You tell him it’s more like being an extra than a guest star, just there for eight or twelve hours beneath the too bright lights trying to school your face to fit the tone of the scene. “Except… my face doesn’t cooperate because of the panic attacks or the nightmares having kept me up the night before and I know you try to fuck the bad moods out of me, baby, I love you, but you also know—“

“That's not how it works,” he finishes for you.

Finger tips trail across the top of your forehead, curving around your temple and down your cheek. “Let's make a plan, okay? Let’s take a sick day tomorrow, you and me, and we’ll stay in bed or I’ll drive you wherever you want to go, buy you all the sugary bullshit you want.”

“And if I want you to leave me alone?”

Laughter bubbles up out of him and fills you in a way that starts to push the other feelings out. “Then I’ll leave you alone, beautiful.”

To make his point, he moves away from you, pushes off the counter and away from you. The fact that he’s not wearing a shirt makes it worse as your fingers slip against his smooth upper arms in an attempt to grab him and pull him back.

Santiago Garcia has never made you feel unseen or unheard, taking the perfect care to understand the intricacies of how the things in your head work; how they learn and adapt and move the goal lines of your healing journey like some kind of mutated virus.

Truthfully, wholly and in every way he can, he sees the moments and strives to meet the points of connection you’re reaching for. 

For a long time, you never let anybody see it. You never let anybody see any of it. That’s where all these feelings come from, this emptiness of a drained body. Because you spend hours covering it all up with make up and clothes and caffeine like a bad relationship except your abuser is yourself now—not the one who put the thoughts there in the first place.

It is exhausting to be two people, the one you are; the one you pretend to be. With Santiago, you only ever have to be the one.

Here. Now. Everyday and always before that.

You let him and he knew that was as good as you telling him you loved him.

[imagobin]

Can you do one of Winter Prince introducing S/O to Ice!Marceline (not sure if that's what they call that Simon's Marceline, haven't seen all of the show)

Thank you for this request, Anon! Took me some time to get inspiration, but that's a super cute idea! I'm gonna make this into a one shot, feels like it'd fit this scenario best, hope that's okay and that you'll like it!

Genre: Slice of Life 🍃 Word count: 1.6k

Icy Daughter

(Y/n) had been dating Winter King for almost a year now. It was an odd relationship to say the least; they could tell the man had a lot of secrets, but he also seemed to truly love (y/n), so they never really asked questions, confident that the King would slowly give them answers as time went by.

He was a very cryptic man after all; despite the months of dating, he’d only managed to trust (y/n) enough to let them move in in the last month or so, and they could always feel the presence of a little Ice Scout following them around whenever they weren’t with the King himself.

Still, (y/n) loved him and was willing to put up with his odd tendencies if it meant they could make progress in their relationship.

One morning, (y/n) was having breakfast while idly chatting with one of the Ice Scouts, sipping on tea which had gone cold by now due to the table’s icy surface.

Winter King had spent the whole night in his laboratory again, which honestly concerned (y/n). That was one of the rooms they had no access to yet, and they always wondered what in the world he could’ve been up to.

The Ice Scout reassured (y/n), however, that the King was in great condition, and would be joining (y/n) for breakfast soon.

As if on cue, Winter King walked through the lab’s doors, making his way towards (y/n) and wrapping his arms around their shoulders. “Good morning, dear!” He said with a slight softness in his voice.

(Y/n) looked at him and smiled, kissing his cheek, which felt cool to the touch, as usual. They couldn’t help but notice how the King had dark circles under his eyes. “Good morning, love… Did you spend another night awake?” (Y/n) asked, looking into the man’s white eyes.

“Oh, there’s no need to worry about me! You know I’m never tired!” The King replied, forcing out a laugh, before spinning (y/n)’s chair around so they’d be facing him. “Actually… I spent the whole night thinking about something of the utmost importance, and I’ve finally made up my mind on the matter.”

“Thinking… about something?” (Y/n) repeated, widening their eyes, whatever could that be? If it kept him up all night it must’ve been something REALLY crucial, maybe… a proposal?!

Winter King nodded, “yes, since you’ve been with me for a while now, I actually want you to meet someone special”

Oh, so… no proposal. Wait, someone special?! “I thought I knew all your… friends already!” (Y/n) exclaimed, their eyes widening in surprise. Winter King had kept that knowledge away from them for that long? But why would he?

“Weeeell, this isn’t a friend as much as it is family!” The King grinned, taking (y/n) by the wrist and lifting them up from the icy chair, while they stammered, trying to process what the king was telling them. Family? Winter King had a family and he’d never told them?!

“H-hold on just a second, I thought you didn’t have any rela-”

(Y/n) was promptly shushed by his finger gently placing itself on their lips. ”Hush… You’ll understand everything as soon as you meet her, I promise.”

Upon that request, (y/n) stopped asking questions, even if they had MANY, but they knew they’d be answered soon, so they managed to hold them off.

 Winter King led (y/n) down to the castle’s oubliette, where a single room opened up, blocked by icy prison bars. Inside the room, a small Ice Girl with pointy teeth was sitting on her bed, playing an axe-shaped bass.

(Y/n) looked at her in a mix of shock and curiosity.

“Dear, why are you keeping her behind bars?” They asked in a whisper, looking back and forth between the two.

The King looked at (y/n) and laughed, “Oh my fair (y/n), don’t look at me like that… it is simply so I’m certain she’s safe from harm!” He explained.

His laughter alerted the little girl, who stopped playing her instrument and ran up to the bars, clinging to them. “Dad!! You came to visit!” She beamed, watching as the man unlocked her door and walked in alongside (y/n). “Who’s… that?”

Winter King grinned and picked up the little girl. “Marceline, this is (y/n), my partner! I figured today was the perfect day to have you two meet, aren’t they lovely?”

(Y/n) flinched slightly at the compliment and chuckled awkwardly, feeling Marceline’s eyes on them. “Uhm… hello there! I’m happy to meet you, Marceline,” they waved their hand, feeling rather tense. He’d never EVER hinted at having a daughter, and she was suspiciously similar to those Ice Scouts, although… she seemed to have more emotions.

Marceline blinked a couple of times, and then smiled. “It’s nice to meet you too!” She replied enthusiastically, holding out her hand.

(Y/n) shook it, and surely enough, she was made of ice. The questions in their head only increased as the seconds passed. Did Winter King create her to have a sense of family? Was she someone who he used to know? Someone who died maybe? Someone he cared a lot about?

However, now wasn’t the time to worry about that. Marceline was right in front of them and (y/n) didn’t want to discuss her nature right now, fearing she might get upset.

“So, Marcy, you’re Winter King’s daughter? I can definitely see the resemblance!” They chuckled softly, letting go of her cold hand. “I heard you playing the bass before, you’re really good, you know? Do you wanna play something?”

The little girl’s eyes sparkled “Y-yeah!! I’ve been practicing a lot!” She answered, getting off of the dad’s knees and picking up the bass again, excited to show someone what she’d been working on.

Winter King just observed as Marceline played her bass, wrapping a hand around (y/n)’s waist. He was glad that things were going well; (y/n) so readily accepting Marceline was something he’d really hoped for and it seemed like it was actually happening! That only made him feel like (y/n) was really the right one for him.

The afternoon went by smoothly, with Marceline showing (y/n) around her room and telling them stories about her good memories with her dad, wishing that he’d visit more often.

“Don’t worry, now that we know each other I’m sure he’ll be more than glad to visit you every day!” (Y/n) had reassured her.

Marceline gasped “Every day?! Is this true? You’ll visit me every day from now on?!” She asked, clinging to the King’s jacket.

“Yes, yes I don’t see why not, after all… I’d love for you two to become even better friends,” he reassured his icy daughter, who seemed overjoyed to have more people to play with.

Soon enough, however, little Marceline had grown sleepy, and Winter King tucked her into bed, before leading (y/n) out of her room, locking the door once more.

“So… what are your thoughts on Marceline?” The King eventually asked, wanting to be sure.

On the way back to their shared room, (y/n) got a bit of a serious look on their face, however. “My love… Little Marcy is adorable, but… why have you never told me about her before? Where did she come from? And why do you keep her locked up in there, when she’s such a well-behaved girl?”

Winter King slightly tensed up at all those questions; he knew (y/n) always had lots of them, but he wasn’t always certain he could give them all the answers, though maybe, he could make an exception this time around. “Dear, I was simply worried… worried that you might not accept her existence. Indeed, as you may have noticed, she is made of ice, just like the Scouts who work for me, she’s very frail, that’s why I hesitated…” He tried to explain.

“So… she’s your creation as well? Is she based on someone?” (Y/n) asked, but the King didn’t seem to like that question.

“I’ll… tell you soon, I promise, it’s just not… something I want to talk about right now. It’s been such a wonderful day, I’d hate for it to end on a sad note…” He whispered softly, looking for the reassuring warmth of (y/n)’s hand, his cold fingers intertwining with theirs. “I promise I’ll tell you…”

(Y/n) looked at Winter King and squeezed his hand lightly. “I understand… I can wait… but will there be a day in which I know everything about you? I don’t care when, I just want to know if that’ll happen.

He paused for a moment, and then slowly nodded, embracing (y/n). “Certainly, you will, I can swear on that…”

(Y/n) smiled a bit “Thank you… I have one more request however…”

“What is it, dear?” Winter King asked.

“Will you… please allow Marceline to roam around the castle? At the very least when she’s with us? I know you’re keeping her there for her safety, but… please, she deserves to have more freedom, and this castle is the safest place in all of Ooo.” (Y/n) replied, hugging the man tightly, and looking up at him with pleading eyes.

Winter King seemed amused, it was true, the castle was very safe, maybe he could allow it, Marceline would’ve probably been happy about it too… “I can’t say ‘no’ to a face like that,” he chuckled, kissing (y/n) on the lips briefly, but intensely. “But you must promise me you’ll keep her safe as well… you two are the most important pieces of my life…”

“I promise, I will…”

The End

[llycaons]

hello!! as someone who loves cql wwx, i really love how you defend wwx’s canon characterizarion vs his fanon one. it’s all so good to read like that’s our boy!! so i wanted to ask as someone who wants to write fic from wwx’s pov, do you have any tips or advice? thank you! 💕

hello, anon! thank you! I'm not a writer, but I'm certainly happy to list some things that bother me in fics from a characterization standpoint (1/2)

sense of self-worth: in canon, flashback arc wwx thinks he's hot shit. he is slightly less obnoxious about it postres, but still has a lot of confidence and knows he's an incredibly skilled (and handsome) cultivator. I see a lot of fics where wwx has a super low sense of self-worth - he verbally talks about how he doesn't deserve another chance, how lwj is better than him, how he deserves punishment, etc. and it ends up with lwj needing to constantly reassure him that he's 'good enough' when in reality that's not their dynamic. wwx doesn't want platitudes, he wants tangible emotional and mental support from someone who believes him and has his back and will commit to him even though his reputation is in tatters. he does make enormous sacrifices, but it's less that he doesn't think he's worth anything and more that he considers his moral or familial obligations to be of higher importance. and he does have regrets but postres he truly doesn't want to suffer any more (dying was punishment enough!), and he certainly doesn't think he deserves more. he doesn't like to dwell on the past since it's so painful and he's rather move on but in theory this should wreak havoc on his mental health since he never actually deals with it? this is something canon doesn't explore as much as I'd want it to but I love reading about him coping with the trauma of his entire life after decades of ignoring it.

...and general emotional state wrt lwj: postres his behavior and dynamic with lwj is a little confusing, so honestly I kind of go with whatever the author's interpretation is. personally I see him in the flashback having a big crush, picking up a similar vibe from lwj after a few mishaps and being excited about it, then BAM the war happens, innocence is lost, and he realizes 1. he can't hope to live as a cultivator alongside lwj, ever and 2. lwj will probably reject him for using DC (which...he does), so he takes control and decides to be the one who cuts off that relationship before lwj can, bc having control over the terrible things that happen in his life is that important to him. but ofc they still stay close and I think by BM it's more like "we know how we feel but neither of us can do anything besides what we're doing' and then wwx loses it a bit and can't focus on anything besides the wens and his sister etc. and THEN postres his reluctance to involve himself with lwj is more due to being unsure about how lwj 16 yrs in the future would treat him, his habitual self-reliance and slight mistrust, and a desire to keep lwj safe and his reputation intact. wwx knows that lwj didn't do everything he could have back then, so he's still a little wary until lwj proves himself, AND he's worried lwj will be ruined bc of being associated with the yllz, famously hated mass murderer/heretic

dynamic with jc: hoo boy. I have seen so many authors screw this one up because they're biased towards jc never having done anything wrong, or the yunmeng sibling bond being sacred and unbreakable and or something. people love to write jc being verbally aggressive and even physically abusive to wwx, and wwx being happy because 'it means he cares' or some shit. drives me up a wall. jc is deeply insecure, chronically contemptuous, violently lashes out when angry, and has steeped in bitterness to cope with grief for decades. he has THE most rancid vibes and nobody likes him and wwx is very rightfully sick of his shit, especially postres. and their story is such a crucial example of how the people we're close to can badly hurt us, and the fact that they love us doesn't mean they're not hurting us or that it's okay. the drama softened jc a bit, but canonically to the novel AND the drama, jc and wwx have always had a rocky relationship. recall jc choking him nearly to unconsciousness after the LP attack, for one. the cracks started showing during the wen indoctrination camp, in which wwx wanted to help lwj, his personal friend and another high-ranking sect heir, during the hunt, potentially saving his life, and jc told him repeatedly to leave him behind since he's not family. and jc hunkers down and tries to protect his people alone, while wwx is fundamentally incapable of abandoning people who he could help. this ideological split between them continued through his (mutually agreed-upon) defection from the jiang sect, and came to a head during nightless city. you may recall that jc told wwx to go to hell while wwx was actively in the middle of committing suicide. based on this, the fact that jc then raised jin ling to hate DCers and wwx specifically, the fact that jc tried to immediately kill wwx when he came back, and the fact that he then tortured wwx psychologically using insider knowledge of his fear of dogs, indicates pretty clearly to me that this man is um. not really a safe person for wwx to be around mentally, emotionally, or physically. and wwx himself knows this! he stands up for himself when being tortured, he accuses jc of never changing, he compares jin ling unfavorably to jc, and he complains about jc's juvenile and cruel behavior frequently there are so many jc defenders in this fandom that interpret his behavior and actions as love or trust or simple ignorance, but the fact is that there is a long-established and extremely serious pattern of jc hurting wwx to vent his own anger, frustration, or pain, whether wwx had anything to do with it or not. and ppl talk about him like he's a defenseless victim even when he's a nearly forty-year old sect leader 🤡. not that he hasn't had his own tragedies or his own reasons for acting as he did, and I do see him as a very tragic figure, but the facts are that he's terrible to wwx and wwx knows that, and responds to it. wwx doesn't hate jc but he doesn't want to be hurt by him anymore and after the age of like 15 he would never respond positively to jc treating him like shit. if he was wary around lwj, you can imagine how nervous he is around jc. please, PLEASE if you're writing wwx, don't let this all be forgotten. I do think there's a way for jc and wwx to become close again, and I do think wwx has forgiven jc if not forgotten the hurt he's caused him, but a HUGE part of wwx's journey is finding and staying with someone he loves who's safe, who cares about him and will prioritize him and won't hurt him.

part two coming up!

[beeindaclouds]

can i have c!dsmp reacting to their friend having some badass powers? like IDK NATURE??? U CAN CHOOSE 😭😭 its like they were friends since small then reader went missing, now fast forward like what, 10 years later, then boom they see them having powers n blah blah (this is optional)

- 👩‍🍳 anon

Hallo 👩‍🍳 anon! This idea is pretty interesting, hope you enjoy <3

C!DSMP react to a Reader who controls natural elements

Includes: Dream, Georgenotfound, Sapnap, Badboyhalo, Skeppy, Quackity, Karl Jacobs, Wilbur Soot, Philza, Technoblade, Nihachu, Eret, Punz, FoolishGamers, Awesamdude

Click Here before requesting, please ^^

Reader: GN - They/Them

You had been friends with them since you were little children

Playing around the, back then, bare land and fighting with your little wooden swords in a fake like war scenario

But, because of a threat that was coming after your family and your secret powers you had to move away and hide

You see, you could control natural elements. Yes that is the basic Air, Fire, Water and Earth.

And that power could be stolen away at any moment if they managed to drink even a drop of your blood, so you really had to leave

Saying goodbye wasn't the easiest, especially without an explanation, but you were kids at the time so it wouldn't have mattered if you knew or not

And now here you are, back in the SMP

The once bare and calm land, full of monuments and houses and life

Some parts were destroyed, holding history to it, others were brand new, ready to make new stories

You didn't make it even half way through the entrance of the "village" before ebign recognised by your childhood friends;

[P.s. I'm deviding them based on who I think would most likely be childhood friends]

The Dream Team + Skephalo were all surprised to see their once shy and close friend be more confident and almost powerful. Most of them were fascinated by your powers, but one of them was thinking of ways to maybe integrate you in his own personal plan;

SBI & Niki almost couldn't believe it was you. Except for your face and voice you looked nothing like the past you. You spent time telling them about your stories and travels, asking for their help to keep you safe in case someone might discover the secret behind your powers. They all were ready to defend you with their life if it ever came to it. Maybe Wilbur was hesitant at first, but he didn't really need your powers anyway;

Karlity were honestly very happy to see you well and alive. It did take Karl a while to recognise you, which you wondered why, but you were just happy to see him again. Quackity almost broke down his facade infront of you; at the time you were the one keeping him and his two, at the time, crushes all togheter. So to see you back was like a sign to maybe ask for help...but he didn't give into his hopes. He actually didn't even tell you what had happened between him and his two former fiancees;

Punz, Foolish, Eret and Sam were shocked to see you. After they all grew up and talked about you, they honestly thought you had forgotten all about them. Foolish and Eret were super happy to see you and catch up, while Punz and Sam were trying to wrap their heads around your new powers.