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#i'm on a role with these 2 am posts
dxxtruction · 4 months
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"Louis acting like a pimp to Armand" And what is a pimp exactly? Quickly. And, oh so sexual trauma survivors can't engage in kink now without it being all about that? Pet names? They can't be submissive anymore? Consensually? Sexually healthy? Be serious. I'd hardly say there's much power difference between them during all this anyway, except that Louis is freer than Armand and it's been putting a strain on their relationship. Louis wants more from Armand, and less of this 'being his past' for them both, and so helping Armand with this could fix that. It's healthy to want to help your partners get out of a rough patch?
I mean, the whole exchange was very clearly set up as a "I want to help you" after such a great moment of vulnerability Louis feels just how much Armand is desperate for it. Louis called Armand so they could work out a plan together.
And the bit with the umbrella was Louis' way of asking 'are you willing to listen to me?' and Armand said yes by unfolding it. Louis goes on and explains, Armand is allowed to argue against it, but Louis makes his point. And then he gives Armand a way to make his own choice in it too. Armand's already decided 'I want you, more than anything else in the world', but Louis still asks after if he's sure of his choice, and with a name, Arun, that is the one of his fullest agency, running the point home. Honoring the situation Armand calls Louis Maitre - as a way of being like 'I'll do as you've said then'. To make this work he's going to have to give Louis some of the control, yes. But it's the first time such a role is ever established, and it was his choice to do it. So so what if they do it in a very suggestive way? They can't like doing that? I think it's them having fun.
I struggle to find how Louis is being overly domineering here when really he's giving and offering Armand the most agency he's ever had. Same with finding it manipulative. The manipulation was more earlier in the episode I think, when he was stringing him along, giving mixed signals. He's no longer toying with him like that. Louis might be pushing Armand, leading him on to make a decision, but he doesn't mean bad by it.
But back to this pimp thing. I find it frankly offensive that this is where people are going with this. I get it, but to run with it being the case is, on many levels, wrong.
Louis told us episode 1 this was the only sustainable line of work to support his family and keep their standing, at the time. It was never his choice to be doing this either but his blackness allowed no other options. He did what he did so his family could stay in that house and maintain all their same comforts. It gave him privileges most black men didn't have at the time that he wanted to maintain and even have more of. Anyway, it doesn't and had never defined him the way 'being good at running things' had. And in that case he just likes having that kind of control where he can get it, which makes sense.
The world is what placed that kind of role onto him of what he was allowed to be able to run, not himself. And on that he actually treated the sex workers he employed well and respected them enough to give them more opportunity.** He recognizes they don't have much in the way of options either.
Louis employed sex workers, yes, but he didn't subject them to abuse, (like how Armand was)*. He didn't oversee things in a way that would go against their consent (see; episode 1 again)**. Sometimes a job is just a job. And Sex work is work.
Armand's particular past with sexual abuses may strike a particular cord with Louis, given all that, but the very last thing either is thinking is that Louis' pimping Armand out here. This is merely their decision as companions, and had nothing to do with adding another line in a laundry list of selling Armands body out to people at the command of someone else. Armand rescinds some of his control to Louis' wishes, because he wants him, and he trusts him, that's all.
If you aren't allowing Armand that choice, and are doubtful it's fully his, you're putting him right back in the box of being defined by his abuses. Putting him back into that space where he isn't given any agency over what he does. (Which is exactly opposite of what the intent of this scene is for)*.
*: (edit) added for clarity.
**: (strike through) numerous people are saying I'm misremembering these points so disregard it. (Thought he was siding with Bricks, it was the other way around). (Technically one aspect of those opportunities were for getting around the law). I don't have a perfect memory, it happens. Let's not get mad about it. Doesn't change much of the point which is that Louis, now, Louis then, was always considering more about the running things and for stated purposes. So I guess I'd say he may only have respected the SWers enough sometimes for what allowed him to do that, and there are moments he certainly expressed remorse over the fact, but he has a great deal higher respect for Armand that is genuine. It's incomparable. Please read my added notes in the tags, it should address most other concerns.
#amc iwtv#iwtv spoilers#iwtv season 2#Loumand#louis du pointe du lac#armand#interview with the vampire#IWTV#Many people are ranting about this but I'm throwing my hat in too#signed someone who went through csa and is close friends with many swers#long rant#noticing spelling errors in this after posting ffff#added note: I'm not saying armand and louis dynamic is without it's flaws or that louis was somehow without his exploitation and faults#while he was a pimp#as a pimp though he certainly wasn't going about it in the same way as what had happened in the brothel or with marius#I more so say that their very actions are of a healthier dynamic than that this is true even if they themselves are not exactly so#all for nuanced and messed up relationships that run everywhere in this show#But I still don't see it as that specific dynamic I wouldn't call it that there's just an amount of that dominence at play#neither want to be tethered to the roles they've been playing previously and they aren't entirely different for it but#are still arriving to this idea of needing something new to define themselves by and something they both want#they're exploring with this companionship that they're still trying to get a feel for#we as an audience might know they never do fully work their shit out and so are doomed but they don't at that point#last thing I guess is that I am not here to start shit it's fictional and not that serious 4 me 2 care enough 2 go after any1#not individually no#These are just my thoughts#I heavily caution using this idea of it being like the pimp 'jumped out' or whatever for reasons above#and its racist implications as others have said more bluntly (I've implied it)
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kiirous · 8 months
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I just now figured out why I prefer not to read from the viewpoint of my favorite character, but rather from the viewpoint of the ship partner I read about. It's simple, really. I just want my favorite characters to be worshiped the way they deserve, and the best way to do that is by reading the viewpoint of their shipping partner. I do prefer to read my favorite character's viewpoint, though, when I'm in the mood to read about them suffering. Or it's none shippy.
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bylertruther · 1 year
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i don't like season three when viewing it as a continuation of seasons one and two, but i do very much like season three when viewing it as the prequel to seasons four and five... hmmmmm.
#rewatching it bc i wanted to make another foreshadowing compilation post for myself regarding what will's actions will#likely be in season five re: vecna and lmao. so many things are just... it's like. it makes me laugh how In Your Face it is now#that we know all that we know. so many direct parallels both with dialogue and actions. mike/will/lucas/el foreshadowing their s4 roles.#the flaying of the holloways and the creels. the dormancy / activation shit. the building shit. the natural progression of their arcs.#the different ways that their characters approach problem solving and how we see tht reinforced by s4. it's so fascinating#genuinely i think idk it was just such a big culture shock i guess u could say from 1 and 2 that it was hard to digest on its own for me#but now that 4 is in the same vein it's like Oh. Okay. Yeah no. I get it now. That's cool. I'm forever bitter but I get it and respect it.#3 4 and 5 are a package deal considering they also said 4 was like part 1 of 5.#it also makes sense bc the point of 3 was that everyone was changing and building themselves in a new way and that#includes vecna so. just so fascinating how they link everything and how their vision is so consistent with certain plots and characters#like. the lucas max mike n will + el involvement is right there. the idea that they have to kill vecna and not just his puppets is right#there. that 2nd point starts in season two but three is where it really turns into an ''the end justifies the means'' situation#(especially for will which i think is something a lot of people overlook but—)#s3 is painful when considering their personal character arcs but fucking delicious when considering the overarching supernatural vecna plot#bc thts also when he starts his ''there is no stopping this'' shtick and actually enters the story#and he's fucking slimy lol. which i Love#anyway. omg first i defended mike in the rain fight and now i'm saying i kind of like season three who the FUCK am i!!!!!#crazy what feeling the need to defend a white boy's honor will do to you 😳
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unproduciblesmackdown · 6 months
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truly lmao 2024 lambda literary award finalist wynnstannery
#have probably already heard of these awards w/o absorbing it but has a sizable [twitter acct you follow follows this acct] overlap for one#wikipedia blurb ''to recognize the crucial role lgbtq writers play in shaping the world...celebrate the very best in lgbtq literature''#Lol! naturally everyone set to laugh abt Individually being lambda award finalist Authors amidst 40+ anthology contributors. sure#and of course oh absolutely crucial cam stone page. we did make the back of book blurb too after all#born of [crucially soph nothingunrealistic (a) investigates that akd role which (ai) leads to me also checking it out. later (b)#investigates this Call For Submissions For All Trans F&F Zine which (bi) leads to me going ''oh so true cam stone Needs to be there'']#all originating in The Wrong Fake ''Fans'' Show Up For Billions By Way Of Beloved Character Winston lmao#b/c fr imagine the trans f&f zine Doesn't have a Did You Know That???? page abt a delightful akd role & canon nonbinary f&f character#but this amidst Plenty of ''fake'' ''wrong'' ''fans'' messing around w/the concept of Fast & Furious as a Work throughout#as i said & got the feedback of [hell yes You Get It] that the premise Guarantees you get a very Varied & inherently Playful response#not b/c playfulness need be ''unserious'' but it sure need not be ''serious.'' like f&f itself; as part of [the premise guarantees it]#& that the Range of ways ppl can approach this broad concept is like the Range of ways ppl can approach the broad concept of Gender lol#& not Unearnest but needing no Gravitas / ''serious'' ''legitimacy'' guaranteed in turn to ''validate'' your efforts#and your not being the ''right'' or ''expected'' audience getting the perhaps straight(tm)forwardly intended experience here lmao#so in many ways it did feel very resonant / relevant to wynnstannery#embracing [the one use of: editor's note!] and [the one use of: the word ''autistic''!]#2 trans 2 furious#which is probably gonna get a physical reprint sooner than later; pdfs still available despite the lack of link there#was already The Intention if vaguely so; now with the added ''can put the 2024 Lambda Award Nominee / Finalist on the cover lol''#page 54 (i believe) brought to you by a couple of quantnoisseurs; rushed to finish last minute then ft. some post deadline edits lmao#classic....nonzero other works i've Heard Of! nice#which: sure does seem like the focus here is like ''did you hear about these books? :)'' as many ''awards'' can ultimately be#like i Am hearing about them now. had seen abt Being Ace on twitter interesting interesting. hi honey i'm homo hell yeah#do we have one or two f&f films left? put cam stone cameo in there for real. Fast furious worth the effort worth the cost#& just shoutout to the like bifurcation of Akd Role Types. [intense in a relatively restrained affect way. some dramatic flair for sure]#and [spontaneous! vivacious! bright! playful! pretty emotionally open!] that's right lmao
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sunstone-smiles · 17 days
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I'm finally starting season 2 of The Legend of Vox Machina 👀
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kenobihater · 4 months
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AUGH. was planning a trip to a big city memorial museum i've never been to before bc all my school field trips and countless later visits were to the main art and history museum. i just looked up the memorial museum, and not only do they have a REALLY cool exhibit coming up concerning a topic i'm interested in, not only do they also have a really extensive archive that available to both academics and the public upon appointment, but volunteer opportunities are available for several positions in the museum including archival assistance!!!
it's administrative duties rather than archival management (which good, people need qualifications for that) but that's literally what i'm considering getting a degree in!!! so it's not only something i'd be passionate about if my application was accepted, but if i decide to commit and enroll this fall, then that would be getting experience in the field!
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zemnian-newcomer · 1 year
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Characters I knew would appear at some point in C3: Percy, Vex, Caleb, Beau, Keyleth, Vax
Pike was a nice surprise, though I guessed we might meet her when Keyleth brought them to Whitestone (didn't know about Laudna's death before I started the campaign and boy was that something to find out. Is that what it feels like to watch CR week to week?)
However, what I did not know about those cameos was 1) that Caleb & Beau and Keyleth & Vax made at least one of their appearances in the same episode and 2) that they would be there AT THE SAME TIME!!!
How did you people deal with that???
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songofwizardry · 1 year
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thinking about beauregard lionett again (when am i not?)
specifically i am thinking about tj like. what are they like once he's older? she is kinda responsible for getting his (their) father locked up. he is the child they replaced her with. that's not... really the most conflict-free of setups
like don't get me wrong i love the fics where they reunite and beau gets to be a part of his life in a lovely way. i'm just... thinking.
like. you can love someone intensely but you still gotta figure it all out and. how does beau learn to be around him, when he's a reminder of everything she wasn't? does TJ see thoreau as he grows up, and if he doesn't, how does he act when he learns she's the expositor who landed him in prison? if he does spend time with thoreau (even if he and clara separate), how does thoreau's input colour his opinion of beau? how does beau reconcile that they were probably treated pretty differently – maybe not better or worse, but certainly different – by their parents, and how does that feel?
idk i'm just thinking about Them. maybe i need to write this.
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ruvviks · 2 years
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Chapter >> 10 [x] Characters >> Cato Wu (oc), Judy Álvarez, Lauren Dimas (oc), Matvey Dobrynin (oc), Mikhail Koshechkin (oc), Panam Palmer, Thibault Lajoie (oc), Viktor Vektor, Vincent Mayer (oc), Vitali Dobrynin (oc), [redacted] Total >> 9.6k words Warnings >> Blood mention, brainwashing mention, death mention, descriptions of suffocation, family, injuries, violence
‘What are we looking at?’
‘Seven attacks have been reported thus far, four of them still on-going. Many casualties among mercs- none of ours yet- word on the street is a fixer was killed, too.’
Clack. Clack. Clack.
Vitali found himself back in the hallway. Pace as fast as it could possibly go, leg painfully protesting with every move, heart racing uncontrollably in his chest and hand white-knuckled around his cane- Judy and Panam by either of his sides, as they hurried toward the medbay.
He had been there before. Two months ago, give or take; when Eddie, Lauren, Mikhail and Panam had been targeted during that damned cargo transport. Never again, Vitali had thought; I will not let this happen ever again.
Naïve, perhaps. Or just fucking stupid. Either way, how wrong he had been- it had only gone downhill from there, from Mikhail’s captivity to Vincent’s, from seeing his mother again to coming face to face with his father in the decrepit Arasaka facility, from meeting Daniil, to-
To Thibault nearly losing his life in an explosion.
Yet another thing Vitali had been unable to prevent. He had not been anywhere nearby, and it was Night City of all places- explosions happened all the fucking time- but it still hit him hard, especially considering how little Thibault had been involved in the situation at all.
Vitali pushed the door of the medbay open and hesitantly stepped inside, almost scared- ashamed- to show his face. Thibault sat on the edge of their bed, next to Cato; and they gave Vitali a weak smile and wave when he entered.
‘Broken wrist, two bruised ribs, some scrapes ‘n bruises,’ Viktor said from the other end of the room before Vitali could ask anything. He sat on his usual stool, taking some quick notes on a notepad before quickly wheeling himself over to the small crowd in his workplace. ‘Your parking lot took most of the damage.’
‘And Vincent’s car too,’ Thibault quietly added, their semi-mechanical voice raspier than usual. ‘I think they rigged it, but- I wasn’t able to see very well.’
‘Never mind his car or my parking lot,’ Vitali cut them off, ignoring the implications of the possibility of Vincent’s car having carried the explosion underneath, and he quickly walked closer and sat himself down on the bed next to Thibault’s to relieve his leg. ‘How are you feeling?’
A pointless question, but what else could he ask? His heart was so heavy.
‘Tired, mostly,’ was the hesitant answer. ‘Ears are ringing, but- other than that, I feel fine. If you need me back in the field, I can walk. Run too, probably- haven’t tried yet, but should be…should be fine, yes.’
‘You’re not going anywhere,’ Vitali softly replied. ‘We have everything covered.’
That wasn’t true. Thibault knew. And Vitali knew that xe knew. But neither of them said any more of it.
Vitali had woken up early that morning. Earlier than usual, feeling refreshed for the first time in a while, and he had gone to work before Vincent and Mikhail had even gotten out of bed. Taken his time with the drive to the office, despite it being nearby enough; though to be fair on a busy day it could still easily take him half an hour if not longer to make it to the other side of Wellsprings.
It had been unnerving, almost, how smoothly most of the morning had passed by. The sun had been shining outside, a warm and sunny day- the start of June, and Vitali had finally felt like he could start planning for Vincent’s birthday. And he had, between the few calls he’d had to take and the single client meeting near noon.
Nothing too big, of course. Just a day for the two of them; ever since they had first kissed on Vincent’s birthday the year before, they’d had only a handful of actual dates, between all the situations they’d found themselves in. Vitali figured it would be nice to have another; he just hoped neither of them would be too tired to leave the house.
But now, even though it was still a week away, Vitali wasn’t even sure if they would be able to do anything at all.
‘Get some rest,’ he quietly said and reached out to Thibault’s not-injured hand, to give it a soft squeeze. ‘I am sure there’ll be plenty of work to do in the building once we get this situation resolved- you could help then, if you really want to.’
‘Of course,’ Thibault replied, and another weak smile took shape on xyr face. ‘That’s what you’re paying me for, no? Kidding- I’d do this for free. You know that.’
I would give you all the world, if I could.
‘Stay with them,’ Vitali quickly said, regaining himself and directing his attention to Cato now as he stood up again. ‘Keep me updated on any new developments here.’
‘Don’t you want me out there?’ Cato asked, gesturing at the most nearby window, a frown decorating her brow. ‘Not injured myself. I can make myself useful.’
‘And I would like for you to do that here.’
Vitali had not been able to get the visual of- of Daniil, his own fucking brother- attacking Cato and trying to stab her out of his head. He knew Cato had dealt with much, much worse before, and after a short conversation following the incident that same day she had not brought it up anymore-
But Vitali had watched enough of his friends end up in pain. It had to stop.
He made his way back to the door and Judy and Panam followed suit again, both having been dead silent in the few minutes they had spent in the medbay. Much to Vitali’s surprise, Viktor stood up from his stool too and walked with him- but he did not question it. No time for that now.
Vitali still was not entirely sure what had happened.
It had all gone fast; a report of an explosion near Regina’s headquarters, followed by report after report of mercenaries getting injured, dying- none of Vitali’s as of yet, though he was not even able to say for sure since most of their systems had suddenly been down too, an outage in the entire Heywood district leaving them with little to work with.
Brief contact with the Council had once again confirmed to Vitali none of them worried about the Broker. He knew it was his father’s doing; had tried to convince them of it, yet before he could have even said a word a distress signal had disturbed their meeting- the currently absent Wakako had been under attack, and it had marked the end of their communication for the time being.
On his own, once again. Supplies still low, mercenaries exhausted and scared- and Vitali was starting to reach the end of his rope.
‘What is our situation?’ he asked, slightly turning his head as the four of them made their way to mission control.
‘Three squads in the field currently,’ Judy replied and held out her tablet a little so Vitali could take a look at the footage. ‘Shiro and Hux are still over at Wakako’s to assist Goro; no new updates as of yet… Eddie and his squad should be nearing the Northside rendezvous by now.’
‘And V?’
A short pause.
‘Not yet been able to reestablish contact.’
Vitali subconsciously fastened his pace, refusing to say any more of it and he rolled back his shoulders, straightening his back as if to show he was not about to back down to nobody in particular; his heart was still racing in his chest and nausea was bubbling up in his stomach, though he managed to keep it at bay for now- much to his own surprise.
‘Panam- Take whoever you can find and get to Westbrook,’ he said, slightly raising his voice. ‘I need that situation under control, stat. Judy, I need either you or Lauren in the Net. We need our systems back online. Are you up for that?’
The deafening silence that followed caused Vitali to slow down and he looked behind him; Viktor had followed him a little further, though both Panam and Judy had stopped in their tracks at some point, both carrying the same hesitant- nearly terrified- look in their eyes.
‘Please,’ Vitali blurted out, heart skipping a beat though he was unsure whether it was out of frustration or fear. ‘If I could do all of this myself, I would.’
‘No, no-! It’s not that,’ Panam immediately responded, her voice slightly unstable as she spoke, and she redirected her attention to the tablet in Judy’s hands. ‘There’s…’
Before she could finish her sentence, a loud siren cut through the air, filling the streets of Wellsprings, loud enough for them to hear inside Vitali’s office. All the air was punched straight out of his lungs and he hurried back, to look over Judy’s shoulder at the screen.
‘Another explosion,’ she quietly said, her tablet showing a live news feed. ‘The docks. There were people there.’
‘Our people?’
‘I… I can’t tell.’
Vitali caved in.
What was he supposed to do? Times like these reminded him that he was so- small. Insignificant. Merely one man in a city so large, and it didn’t matter what he did. It would never make a difference.
Just like he had never been able to make a difference in Arasaka, like he had wanted to when he had started working for them all those fucking years ago. Stuck in a never ending cycle- a hell of his own making- believing he could mean something in the bigger picture of things-
‘Just the more reason to get a move on,’ Viktor suddenly said. ‘Our people or not- they can use all the help they can get.’
Vitali instantly snapped back to reality and he quickly nodded, a weight washing off his chest when Viktor suddenly reached out and placed a strong hand on his shoulder, almost as if to ground him. His gaze moved back to the girls, and they both seemed to regain themselves as well.
‘Westbrook. Wakako,’ Panam quickly said, and nodded too. ‘Preem, on it. Judes?’
Judy blinked and inhaled deeply, straightening her back and her eyes met Vitali’s for a split second. He understood why she was hesitant. Understood that Lauren would be hesitant, too- after everything that had happened, to the both of them- but they were the only ones capable of diving into the Net and Vitali needed someone to cover that front for him-
Again, if he could do it all himself, he would.
‘I’ll find Lauren, have a chat,’ she finally responded. ‘We’ll- We’ll rock, paper, scissors about it.’
‘Good,’ Viktor said, removing his hand from Vitali’s shoulder. ‘No need for a deep dive, just- getting our systems back online, some surface level surveillance and plugging potential holes in case of an attack.’
Vitali’s heart finally slowed down and he pushed back his shoulders again, head suddenly a lot clearer than before. He watched in silence as Panam gave Judy a warm hug and kiss on her cheek; and she turned around and walked off, giving Vitali a soft punch against his shoulder as she passed him by.
‘Whoever his Netrunner is, they’re good,’ Judy quietly said. ‘Just hope they’re not- not waiting for someone to get in the chair.’
‘I highly doubt it, given the circumstances,’ Vitali replied, knot in his chest briefly tightening. ‘Besides, our focus is defense this time; as long as we stay out of their systems, there is no way they can get to you the way they tried before.’
Of course Vitali could not say any of it with one hundred percent certainty- but what else was there left for him to say? He wished he could do without a runner, wished he could fix any of it himself-
‘You’re right,’ Judy suddenly said and she nodded, sucking in another deep breath. ‘Got you covered, jefe.’
Vitali was unable to suppress a relieved smile.
‘Thank you.’
The situation was hard on everyone. It had been going on for way too long now and still had no end in sight, and these attacks would only complicate things in the long run; yet somehow everyone was still there. Nobody had walked away from it yet, nobody had abandoned Vitali despite the fact the Council was not helping them-
Viktor reached out for him again and softly tapped his arm to get his attention, then nodded into the rest of the hallway.
‘Mission control,’ he encouragingly said. ‘We got work to do, kid.’
The two of them quickly continued their way, Vitali still focused on the siren blaring through the sub-district. He still didn’t fully understand why the attacks were happening, but that was a problem for later; they had to get the situation under control, one way or another. Matvey couldn’t have that many people working for him.
Right?
Vitali bit the inside of his cheek as they entered mission control and exhaled sharply, mind wandering back to all the mercenaries who had walked away from him and had joined his father’s fixer network instead. Add to that all the outsiders who had joined over the years, and his father’s connections to several corporations-
‘There you are.’
Mikhail’s voice dragged Vitali out of the fog in his brain and a sense of comfort washed over him, like the presence of his friend had always been able to do. Mikhail appeared in his view and reached out to briefly cup his cheek, before also glancing at Viktor and giving him a solid nod.
‘Everything alright?’ he asked, tilting his head slightly as he redirected his attention to Vitali.
‘As good as it can be,’ Vitali answered. He carefully let his gaze trail the room; there were only a few people there, mostly talking quietly to each other while nervously glancing at the large screen on the wall. It was still showing a connection error with several large, flashing warning popups. ‘Xe’s got a broken wrist, some bruised ribs- Cato is still with xem for now.’
At times he genuinely wondered how much more injuries it was going to take before someone would end up losing their life.
‘That is good to hear.’ Mikhail spoke quietly and he stepped a little closer to Vitali, once more reaching out to him to place a hand on his upper arm. ‘But I meant with you.’
Vitali blinked, Mikhail’s words taking a moment to fully settle in his head; it was not uncommon for his friend to ask him that, yet at this point Vitali’s own well-being seemed mostly irrelevant to himself given the circumstances they had found themselves in.
‘As good as it can be,’ he quietly repeated himself.
The screen on the wall suddenly flickered and within a few seconds their feed was back online, showing Vitali live footage of the still on-going fight on Jig Jig Street. He immediately directed his attention away from Mikhail and walked closer, reaching for his hearing aid and switching to the communication line of his office building.
‘Judy?’ he asked, watching as the lights in the room briefly flickered off and on as the screen switched to live footage extracted from MaxTac bodycams.
‘Guess again,’ Lauren replied instead, and Vitali once again couldn’t stop a smile from spreading across his face. ‘At your disposal, jefe.’
It was good to have her back. Judy was good at what she did- but at the end of the day more of a techie than a runner and her knowledge was limited to the things she had been taught over time. Taught by Lauren, who had been in the chair for much longer, and whose thinking process lined up almost exactly with that of Vitali meaning less communication was needed between the two in order to get things done.
‘Can we reestablish contact with V?’ Vitali asked, a new sense of control shaking him right back awake. He nearly slipped up- had gotten so comfortable using Vincent’s full name he sometimes forgot not everyone knew about it yet.
‘One step ahead of you. Sending out a ping as we speak,’ Lauren answered. ‘Got all three of them on our radar still, so they’re not- you know. They’re still here.’
Good.
Vitali bit the inside of his cheek hard as he waited for Lauren to get back to him, placing his hands on the desk he was stood in front of. His eyes were glued to the screen, watching intently as the MaxTac officers arrived at the docks of Wellsprings- several cars were on fire, people were running everywhere, and in the background he could see several mercenaries emerge from around the corner right before they opened fire-
‘Got him,’ Lauren said and Vitali’s heart skipped a beat. ‘Connecting you now.’
Finally.
‘V, can you hear me?’ Vitali asked, voice barely stable as he spoke and hands white-knuckled around the edge of the desk in front of him. His heart was once again going a million miles an hour in his chest and he leaned heavily on his arms, suddenly barely able to keep his own balance anymore.
A brief silence followed, though each second that passed felt like an hour. Mikhail had walked closer again and placed a reassuring hand on Vitali’s back, softly running it up and down in an attempt to calm him down.
But as much as Vitali appreciated it, it did not work. He had to hear him. He had to hear his voice.
‘V?’ he repeated, swallowing heavily as tears threatened to well up in the corners of his eyes. ‘V- please say something.’
I can’t lose you. Please- not you.
‘Loud and clear! Fuck, it’s good to hear your voice again.’
Vitali’s eyes fluttered shut and a relieved sigh escaped his lips, and for a second he felt like he could pass out. Vincent’s ever-so bright voice was like music to his ears, even now that he sounded mostly exhausted; Vitali could not blame him. He felt exactly the same.
‘Where are you right now?’ he quietly asked, glancing at Viktor who had walked up to him as well and now stood beside him at the desk, an unreadable expression on his face; had not said a word since back in the hallway, as if he was deep in thought.
‘Near the bridge in Arroyo,’ Vincent answered. ‘Followed some gonks after a scuffle on Hargreaves Street- there’s an old warehouse here that looks like it’s being used as a temporary hideout.’
Another temporary hideout. Good.
It felt too easy. It was too easy- there was no way Matvey would slip up like that and Vitali knew if he would go there he would be walking directly into a trap of some sort.
But he had to try.
‘You’re doing great, but- please don’t push it too far,’ Vitali said, loosening his grip on the desk. ‘Lauren will stay in touch with you, okay? Please be careful.’
‘Careful is my middle name, ‘member?’ Vincent answered, and Vitali could almost see the playful smirk on his face through the communication line. ‘Won’t get too close until you give me the signal, promise.’
Vitali switched off his comms and turned back, resolutely making his way back to the entrance of the room. As always- unable to just sit back and watch, unable to leave the situation to his mercenaries. Yes, he paid them to work for him; yes, they were capable of handling it themselves; but they were his friends, and he could make himself the most useful in the field with them.
‘Where are you going?’ Mikhail asked, a worried frown taking shape on his face as he took some steps after Vitali.
‘Going to meet up with Vincent,’ Vitali plainly answered, briefly slowing his pace and turning back to him. ‘I want you to stay here and oversee the situation. Can you do that for me?’
‘Of course.’ Mikhail paused and swallowed, glancing back at the screen behind him and then looking back at Vitali; but he could not make eye contact anymore, several quiet noises leaving his lips before he spoke again.
‘Please be careful,’ he said in Russian. ‘You know what he’s capable of, now.’
Mikhail had almost died. If Matvey had aimed slightly more to the right-
‘I know,’ Vitali quickly responded, pushing the thoughts out of his head. ‘I’ll be careful, don’t worry.’
He left the room again, head threatening to fill with fog but it was surprisingly easy to push it back this time, mind constantly going back to Vincent. Clack, clack, clack- back into the hallway, to get to weapon storage and get suited up- and much to his surprise, Viktor followed him again.
‘Vitya, you’re not coming with me,’ Vitali instantly said, voice a little sharper than he had meant for and he picked up his pace a little as if he could outrun Viktor like that. He knew the old ripperdoc could fight, and still did every now and then; but he was not a mercenary, far from it, and Vitali did not even want to think about the things that could happen to him out in the field.
‘Don’t think you got much say in any of that,’ Viktor merely responded.
‘You work for me. I would like for you to stay here.’
‘I do- and my shift ended about an hour ago. I’m coming, whether you like it or not. Gonna try and stop me?’
Vitali blinked and straightened his back, a weird sensation running through his chest he couldn’t quite place. They reached weapon storage together, and Viktor instantly reached out to open the door and hold it for Vitali.
Yes, they had worked together before, many times- yet never like this, never together in the field. But Vitali knew Viktor long and well enough to know he was about as stubborn as Vitali himself, and to try and stop him?
Vitali wouldn’t even dare.
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‘Get down!’
Vincent jumped out of the way just in time, hiding behind a truck as the cryogenic grenade that had been hurled at his head exploded right on the other side. It set off the truck’s alarm and the piercing noise burned through his ears, disorienting him to the point he briefly forgot where he was.
It was just the five of them; him and four other mercenaries he didn’t even know the names of. Not as if it mattered- they were all allies in this, even the two of them who were not even part of Vitali’s network.
Though at that moment he found himself alone on the street, under attack from all sides by Matvey’s mercenaries- and they were not pulling their punches this time.
Vincent sprinted across the road and kneeled down behind another parked car- or- what was left of it, really. He reloaded his gun and glanced over his shoulder, noticing more enemies coming his way; they came straight from the Broker’s new hideout, heavy assault rifles at the ready, with seemingly an endless supply of ammo.
Vincent himself was on his last clip.
He hadn’t gotten too close to the warehouse, well aware of the security turrets placed on the premises. Toys from the abandoned Arasaka facility they had attacked before, and so far Vincent had not been able to quickhack them.
But the fight going on in the rest of the street had been obvious enough to draw the attention of more people and they had shown up in full force, and despite the fact they were still holding their ground, Vincent was starting to wonder if it would be smarter to pull back.
‘Heads up, V- seeing several drones on my radar coming your way.’
‘Seriously?’ Vincent yelled, exasperation dripping from his voice. ‘Of course they have drones, too.’
‘Hit ‘em on the underside,’ Lauren calmly responded. ‘Saves ammo, should take ‘em down in one or two. Six o’clock- get ready.’
Vincent looked up at the sky and saw three combat drones closing in quickly, all headed straight for him. One of them was already under fire, from what he could see- one of the mercenaries had popped up again and managed to cause the drone to catch fire, and it tumbled out of the air before it could even get close.
Vincent raised his gun and exhaled, relaxing the muscles of his shoulders as he wrapped his finger around the trigger.
Take the wind into account, kid.
Right, of course. Vincent wasn’t good at calculating anything, he usually eyeballed it and somehow it nearly always worked; he quickly adjusted his aim slightly to the right and pulled the trigger, and watched as sparks and black smoke erupted from the bottom of the second drone, right before it exploded and knocked the third drone out of its course straight into a street light.
That was easy.
Don’t get too cocky.
The corners of Vincent’s lips curled up into a smile and he could almost hear Johnny’s exasperated sigh in his head, as if he was still there with him, leaning against the street light next to him perhaps, or sitting on top of the remains of the car he was hiding behind.
Sudden gunfire immediately drew him back to reality and he lowered his head, quickly scuttling around the car to create more distance between himself and the nearing mercenaries. Only limited ammo left- he would have to pick his shots carefully, and there were still so fucking many of them-
Though as Vincent prepared himself for shooting back, most of the gunfire suddenly stopped, and soon it was almost entirely quiet on the street. He frowned and carefully looked up, eyes trailing his surroundings until he saw-
Vitali?
Vincent had never been this relieved to see his boyfriend.
He immediately jumped up and hurried his way over, briefly pausing to sink through his knees and grab a precision rifle from the ground. He slowed his pace, aiming the rifle and steadying himself- and he hit the merc trying to sneak up to Vitali right between the eyes.
Suddenly the world was spinning and Vincent’s head hit the asphalt, vision instantly going black for a few seconds from the impact. The moment he regained consciousness he was pinned to the ground, rifle no longer anywhere near him and two hands wrapped tightly around his neck.
Tears sprung in his eyes as he grabbed the mercenary’s wrists and struggled in their grip. He tried to kick his legs, but they were stuck underneath the merc’s knees, their body weight too much for him to be able to free himself.
Hey, now. Don’t panic.
But it was difficult. Vincent tried to suck in a breath but his windpipe was being crushed, leaving him with little oxygen in his lungs. He reached for the mercenary’s face and tried to poke them in their eye, or grab their hair and yank their head back, anything, but his fingers couldn’t find a grip and they kept turning their head away from him.
His vision was fading again, and rapidly now. Though seconds before he could lose consciousness once more, the weight was suddenly entirely lifted from his body and he gasped for air, instantly kickstarting himself into a coughing fit, the raspy noise from his throat mixing with the cries and screams from the mercenary.
A strong hand grabbed his own and pulled him back on his feet with such force Vincent toppled forward and bumped right into the person who had helped him-
Viktor?
Vincent had known Vitali was on his way, but he had never thought to ever see the ripperdoc in the field there with him.
‘You alright, kid?’ he asked, pushing a new handgun in Vincent’s hands. Vincent was unable to answer and quickly nodded in response, eyes rapidly trailing their surroundings once more-
It was quiet. For now. No enemy mercenaries, just the two of them, Vitali, and their four other allies, all in the process of gathering themselves and assessing the situation.
Catch your breath, V. You’re not in the clear just yet.
Vincent quickly jogged up to Vitali and hugged him without hesitation, relief filling his chest the second Vitali wrapped his arms around his waist in response and buried his face in the crook of Vincent’s neck. To think that at some point Vincent had been hesitant to initiate anything with him, terrified of overstepping a boundary, terrified of the possibility of Vitali prioritizing his reputation over what they had-
‘Are you alright?’ Vitali worriedly asked, lifting his head again and gently cupping Vincent’s face in his hands. ‘Are you injured? I’m sorry it took this long, we were held up by fucking NCPD pigs when trying to cross district border-’
‘I’m okay! I’m okay,’ Vincent quickly interrupted him, slightly turning his head to press a kiss on the palm of Vitali’s hand. ‘You’re here now. I’m- I’m glad you came.’
He watched relief wash over Vitali’s face and lifted his own hands to place them over Vitali’s, thumbs softly running over his skin. Vitali leaned in and rested his forehead against Vincent’s, eyes fluttering shut; the way their heads hit one another with a bit more force than usual told Vincent he was exhausted.
‘All due respect, we gotta get a move on,’ Viktor gently interrupted them, pointing his own weapon into the direction of the warehouse. ‘Looks like they’re reorganizing again.’
‘What’s the plan?’ one of the other mercenaries asked. They were leaning heavily on one of the others, hand clutching their side- all four of them looked as exhausted and beaten as Vincent felt and his chest tightened.
‘I’m going in,’ Vitali bluntly said, slowly lifting his head again. ‘Preferably alone, but- I feel like not everyone here will let me. Could you distract those mercs for me? Just- lure them away, no need for another fight.’
Straightforward as ever, no time for going in circles around the point he was trying to make. Vincent watched as the mercenaries briefly shared a look, and then one of them quickly started making their way to a nearby car and got in.
‘Yeah, we can do that,’ one of the others said, slowly nodding. ‘Why go in? Sounds like suicide to me.’
‘Perhaps,’ Vitali merely answered. ‘But I have to try.’
Another attempt at trying to talk some sense into Matvey. Vincent could not help but wonder why; but at the same time this was far from the right time and place to ask Vitali about it and he wisely kept his mouth shut when his boyfriend started making his way toward the warehouse without saying another word.
Vincent followed suit. Of course he did; he was not going to let Vitali enter the place all by himself, or with just Viktor to back him up. He was unsure how Vitali was going to approach the situation this time, but- he trusted him. Had always trusted him; wasn’t going to let that change now.
A loud honk from a car behind them startled Vincent and he instinctively jumped aside, only realizing when the vehicle passed by him it were the mercenaries- one of them waved at him as the car drove by. Vincent watched them slow down in front of the warehouse and fire a couple of shots at the mercenaries outside; as soon as they all began moving toward the car, they sped off, leaving the terrain surrounding the warehouse mostly cleared.
Eyes open. Watch out for those turrets.
The three of them quickly made their way around the building from a respectable distance, keeping their eyes on the stationary turrets as Johnny had told Vincent to do. Vincent’s heart was still going faster than usual, adrenaline rushing through his body and keeping him alert; it was not as bad yet as when they’d attacked Matvey’s previous hideout, but it was getting close to it.
Perhaps he wasn’t there. Perhaps it was just a rendezvous for the mercenaries, perhaps they would go inside and find nothing but the Broker’s people and a shitton of supplies, perhaps Matvey himself was someplace entirely else, looking down on them from his bloodied throne-
But something told Vincent he was inside. Waiting.
‘Stay alert,’ Vitali said, raising his gun while slowly pushing against the back door of the warehouse. ‘No idea what to expect.’
An unguarded, unlocked door. It felt like a trap. But at the same time, if Matvey had wanted them dead he would have done that last time. Well- he would have tried a little harder then, at least.
Right?
They went in.
The interior of the warehouse was poorly lit. A small backroom; some crates and supplies stacked up along the walls, and two tables standing shoved against each other in the middle of the room. The door leading into the hallway on the wall opposite of them was already open, and Vincent could hear booming, echoing voices from what he could only assume was a larger open area within the building’s walls.
He aimed his gun at the door, briefly glancing behind him as Viktor entered after him and shoved one of the crates in front of the door to keep it ajar. Vitali pushed himself past the tables and glanced into the hallway, then turned to Vincent and gestured for him to follow.
It was too easy. But what else could they do?
The hallway was empty too and seemed to grow in size before Vincent’s eyes, his breathing shallow as they carefully moved through it. The sudden urge to turn around and run away filled his chest; something that rarely happened, but it felt appropriate in the moment.
Of course he was terrified. But again- he was not going to leave Vitali. If it had been the other way round, Vitali wouldn’t have run away either.
The three of them gathered around the next door opening, leading into the central room of the warehouse. Vincent carefully peered inside and counted five mercenaries still present- right at that moment, the front doors swung open and three more entered, but after grabbing some new weapons they left again.
Vincent’s eyes were drawn to the two men loudly talking to each other. One of them was bald, Valentinos tattoos covering his head and neck, and he was dressed in heavy combat armor; the other was skinny and at least a head shorter than the other man, left side of his forehead, temple and his left eye replaced with cyberware, and he was still yelling about as loud if not louder than his associate.
‘Sanders and Dusty,’ Vitali mumbled, a quiet scoff leaving his lips with the statement. ‘Fucking traitor.’
Vincent had seen Sanders once before, on the big screen back at Vitali’s office after one of his escorts had nearly been blown up. He was unfamiliar with Dusty, but had heard his name before, at least- and he was well aware the man was one of the many mercenaries who had left Vitali’s network, only to join Matvey’s instead.
‘Don’t lose focus,’ Viktor quietly responded, positioned next to Vincent. ‘Not what we’re here for.’
So easy to just flatline ‘em, though.
Shut up, Johnny.
Vincent directed his attention to Vitali and watched the expression on his face change. He visibly clenched his jaw and straightened his back again, regaining himself as he nodded, not saying another word about it.
Vincent admired him so much. He knew many people, though none of them had the level of self-restraint in them as Vitali, and especially since he himself still often struggled with controlling himself and his emotions he had immense respect for Vitali and the way he was able to keep it together.
But he was also well aware Vitali had been struggling lately. It was visible in his appearance- the dark rims around his eyes, the dark roots of his hair showing much more prominently than he would usually allow for- and in the way he would sometimes be barely present- either lost inside his own head, or remnants of Arasaka’s brainwashing- yet he was still making it through and handling the situation better than Vincent ever could.
‘Can I help you, gentlemen?’
A familiar voice, right behind them.
Vincent flinched and turned around but was immediately met with Viktor’s back as he stepped in front of him, and Vitali instantly jolted forward and stumbled into the larger room to create as much distance between himself and the voice as possible.
Matvey Dobrynin.
Fuck.
Vincent immediately followed Vitali, raising his gun steadily at the mercenaries inside the moment they looked up in confusion; Dusty immediately raised his own gun too but the others stood unmoving, merely staring at the two of them, and watching as Viktor too entered the room, walking backwards, keeping himself positioned between Vitali and the Broker.
‘Took you long enough,’ Matvey said, his voice booming through the room as he slowly entered after them. ‘Have been expecting you for some hours now. Your priorities lie elsewhere?’
‘Some…situations that required my immediate attention,’ Vitali spat back, steadying himself and cocking his head up, chin pushed forward. ‘As you are most likely well aware.’
‘Vito,’ Vincent quietly mumbled, stepping a little closer until their shoulders were pressed against each other. He was still facing the other way and nervously watched while the mercenaries wandered closer, Dusty up front.
‘So you really are back, huh?’ the short man said, half a smile lingering on his lips as he walked around the two of them, completely unfazed by Vincent’s gun pointed directly at his head. ‘Hey, boss. Missed me?’
The mocking tone of his voice made Vincent’s stomach turn and he instantly noticed a dark shadow washing over Vitali’s face. Dusty was merely staring at him- and the smile on his face only widened upon seeing Vitali’s frustration.
‘Pathetic piece of shit!’ Vitali spat at him and took a step closer- and within seconds the other mercenaries had their guns out too and Vincent grabbed Vitali’s wrist to stop him from moving any closer.
‘Come on, now, Vitali- no need for such language,’ Matvey calmly said, and Vincent finally turned his head to look at him; white shirt, top button undone, no tie, sleeves rolled up, hair pushed back out of his face-
A knot took shape in Vincent’s chest. In appearance, Vitali truly was his father’s son.
‘You have no say in that,’ Vitali said, the sharp edge to his words startling Vincent a little. He had taken a step closer to Vincent again, but the way he composed himself told Vincent he was still ready to attack at any given moment. ‘What happened between me and my mercenaries is none of your fucking business.’
‘I think it is my business, considering they are no longer your mercenaries but mine.’ Matvey gestured at the mercs to lower their guns and they listened instantly- it made Vincent nauseous.
Told you to just flatline ‘em.
Not the time, Johnny.
‘Being upset about my departure is one thing, but turning on me and trying to kill my mercenaries crosses a line,’ Vitali continued, but Dusty instantly cut him off.
‘It’s not about you leaving,’ he said, ‘it’s about us losing our safety net. I couldn’t give a rat’s ass about you running off to wherever you went! But you provided us with a lot more than just cash- and Mikhail sure as hell didn’t follow through with all of that in your absence. Do you have any idea what it’s like to suddenly just be left to your own fucking devices?’
Vitali’s face hardened and he glared in his father’s direction.
‘As a matter of fact, I do.’
The tension in the air surrounding them was suffocating and Vincent briefly lowered his gun as well, arm suddenly a lot heavier than before. He tightened his grip on Vitali’s wrist and he turned to look at Matvey again when said man cleared his throat.
‘It is all in the past now,’ he merely said, and despite it being obvious he was referring to Vitali’s mercenary situation Vincent couldn’t help but notice the heaviness of his words. ‘There is no use in trying to undo what has already been done.’
‘But you can stop!’
Vitali’s voice broke.
‘Stop all of this- this madness!’ he said, wildly gesturing around with his free arm. Vincent was up close enough to notice his eyes filling with tears. ‘Tell your mercenaries to pull back, leave Night City out of this!’
‘This is not all about you, Vitali,’ Matvey slowly said, his voice low.
‘Truly so? I fucking doubt it!’
Vitali’s voice echoed through the room and a strangled sob left his throat.
‘You get fired, and this is what you do?’ he said, and when Vincent let his own hand slip into his, he gratefully interlocked their fingers. ‘And you blame me for it. And you claim I abandoned you- I called! I called every fucking day, dad- I tried to reach out, I didn’t want to- I didn’t want you to-‘
He was unable to finish his sentence.
Vincent’s eyes darted between Vitali and Matvey, breathing shallow and heart beating rapidly in his throat as he watched a shadow wash over the Broker’s face. His expression had changed- yet remained unreadable to Vincent, and he quickly regained himself the moment he realized Vitali was no longer speaking.
‘It was your mother’s decision,’ he bluntly said. ‘But enough of that. I think- this should be enough for now. Sanders, give them the signal. We’re leaving.’
That’s it?
Vincent had no idea what to think anymore.
It had felt like a trap. It had looked like it, too; but now it was suddenly over, just like that, as if it hadn’t even been a big deal to begin with. Not to mention Matvey’s words; telling Vitali it had not been his decision to ignore him after he had left home- what did it change?
‘Not so fast,’ Viktor suddenly said and Vincent’s head snapped up again. Matvey had stepped forward and Viktor had positioned himself in front of him once more, effectively blocking his path.
‘All of this- for what?’ Viktor continued; and Vincent could not help but notice he wasn’t holding his gun anymore. ‘Because you believe your son walked away from you?’
‘One does not walk away from family,’ Matvey instantly spat back, voice slightly raised, and for a second it was as if they were looking at a completely different man the way sudden rage overtook his face. ‘First he left, and then he took everything from us. You have no idea what you are talking about- tread lightly.’
‘Ever wondered why he left?’ Viktor interrupted him. ‘Has it ever occurred to you that maybe you had somethin’ to do with that? Or that maybe you getting fired was out of his control?’
‘Vik, stop,’ Vitali quietly said, but the ripperdoc didn’t hear him and instead took a step closer, to the point the mercenaries, who had started to turn away, stopped in their tracks and turned back, watching them carefully.
‘Kids grow up,’ he slowly said. ‘Leave the nest at some point in their lives. You know what sounds like abandonment to me? Not answering their calls. Ignoring their attempts to connect. Feels like you got some o’ the detes of your story twisted, dad.’
Everything happened so fast.
Matvey swung at Viktor but was too slow and Viktor caught his punch with ease- then balled his fist and went for a swing himself and he hit Matvey right on his nose. Vitali flinched when it happened, and the mercenaries all started yelling, reaching for their weapons once more.
Vincent instantly looked up at the hanging ceiling lights above their heads, rapidly scanned them and triggered a quickhack- the bulbs exploded all at once, causing the mercs to scatter before they could fire any shots; and he jolted forward, pushing himself past Viktor and Matvey and dragging Vitali along with him, back into the hallway, to safety.
‘Fuck!’ Vitali cried out and tugged on Vincent’s hand as if he was trying to slow him down, but Vincent was having none of it. With all of his strength he managed to drag Vitali back to the room they had entered the building through and they stumbled back outside, the sunlight briefly blinding him.
‘We have to go back,’ Vitali said, his voice still unstable. He stumbled back towards the door, but it instantly swung open again and Viktor barged outside, seemingly unscathed, startling Vitali to the point he jumped back into Vincent.
‘What the fuck was that about?’ Vincent yelled, nearly losing his balance from the impact of Vitali’s body against his own. He wasn’t even angry, Matvey had it coming- but they had gotten what they had come for and if anything this had just put them in unnecessary danger.
‘Someone had to do it,’ Viktor simply responded, briefly glancing behind him. ‘I don’t think they’re comin’ after us, but- let’s bounce before more show.’
Vincent was speechless.
He sucked in a deep breath and tried to get his heartbeat to slow down but his body was having none of it, still believing they were in danger- and truly, he had no idea if they were safe or not. They had been inside for such a short period of time, yet so much fucking happened- and he couldn’t wrap his head around it.
And like that, they were walking away again.
But it did not feel right.
Vincent remained silent as he walked, eyes glued on Vitali, a little bit ahead of him. He was walking fast; visibly struggling a little, despite the leg brace, but he said nothing of it as they made their way through the street again, back to where he had parked his car.
Vincent’s dad loved his job too.
A little too much, if you’d asked Vincent- to the point he would always excitedly tell his wife and four kids about the crimes he had solved that day over dinner, in such great and vivid detail it would almost make you wonder if he was even allowed to talk about all of that.
And- highly unsuitable for kids, of course. Vincent could perfectly recall many occasions in which he’d ended up with nightmares because of the overly graphic stories of his asshole cop of a father, and to say he cared about his old man would be a fat fucking lie. It’s why he had not bothered to try and stay in touch with his parents, after he had left home.
But he knew that if Richard had been fired for whatever reason, he would not have put the blame on any of his kids. And he knew- it had happened before, when his brother Jason had suddenly left home when Vincent was twelve- he knew he would never accuse them of abandoning the family, even if they were to leave in a hurry, even if they would never call again.
But at the same time, if Richard had been in Matvey’s position, doing what he did- endangering Vincent’s friends, seemingly hunting them down for sports- Vincent would not have hesitated to deal with him the easy way.
It was a complicated situation. Vincent did not know all the details on Vitali and Matvey’s relationship and from what he could gather it was a lot more complicated than he had initially assumed. If it had been up to Vincent, he would have already pulled the trigger-
But it was not up to him. At the end of the day, Vitali was still his boss- but he was also his boyfriend, his best friend. Vincent had no right to make that decision for him.
He bit the inside of his lip and briefly glanced behind him at the warehouse. He noticed several cars driving in their direction and he immediately reached for his weapon again, readying himself for another fight- but the cars stopped at the warehouse and the mercs who had still been inside left the building.
Matvey was nowhere to be seen.
It would be so easy- so easy to turn back and go back inside, attack him when he’s all by himself- but when Vincent looked back at Vitali and noticed his clenched, shaking fists and the thousand yard stare plastered on his face, he knew it was of no use to try and suggest it to him.
So instead he jogged up to him and gently took his hand again, thumb reassuringly running over the back of his hand as he gave it a light squeeze, and he allowed Vitali to slightly lean in to him while they walked for support.
‘We got what we came for,’ he quietly said, leaning in to give Vitali a kiss on his cheek. ‘It’s over- for now.’
‘I don’t know,’ Vitali quietly replied. He briefly looked at Vincent, but was unable to hold his gaze and he quickly turned his head again, eyes wandering off to the distance as a shallow exhale left his chest.
‘I have a bad feeling about this.’
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Vitali’s head hurt.
They’d arrived at a rendezvous a few minutes ago- a small apartment in Japantown, sometimes used as a safehouse by Vitali’s mercs- and had reunited with Shiro, Huxley and Panam and her squad. Viktor had sat himself down on the couch the moment they’d entered and had not moved since; and Vincent was in the kitchen, slowly trying to wash some dried up blood off his arms.
Had Vitali been a little more present, he would have helped him.
But he was lost inside his own thoughts, standing at the window and staring down onto the busy streets as his eyes darted from the left to the right, looking- searching, for anything out of the ordinary, anything that would tell him his father’s mercenaries had decided to get back to work.
It had all stopped, after they had visited the warehouse. Lauren had reported back to Vitali, telling him the ongoing confrontations had stopped and she was gathering footage of the sudden retreat, to hopefully be able to trace it all to a single location for their next move; whatever that would be.
He was cold.
Freezing, actually- it was a decent temperature outside and the apartment was full enough at the time to warm up by itself, yet Vitali found himself shivering and he could barely feel his fingertips.
He did not understand Matvey’s anger. It was unreasonable to the point Vitali could barely believe he was awake; truly all of this, because he had left home? Because his parents had been fired, indirectly because of him?
He took everything from us.
A soft, sudden scoff left Vitali’s lips, startling himself. Everything- yet money-wise Matvey was still doing just fine, business-wise too, and despite it all he still had his wife and daughter.
Was he truly so blinded by his hatred for Vitali to see?
‘Fuck you,’ Vitali mumbled to nobody in particular and dropped his head against the cold glass of the window with a little bit more force than he had meant for. ‘All I ever did was try.’
Words he wished he could say to him. Words he wished he could have said to him a long time ago; but he had simply never been able to, whether it was because he was too afraid or because Matvey wasn’t listening or because he just wasn’t there.
All he had ever done was try, and now he was doubting it. Had any of it been worth it? Was it still worth it? Wouldn’t it be easier to just give up?
But what would happen then? Vitali still had his friends relying on him; he still had his business to take care of, and the Council was also still there, expecting him to take care of his responsibilities despite rarely taking care of their own. Would he move on, pretend nothing was happening?
How many more people would get injured? How many more people would die?
Vitali turned his head to look at Viktor. He still hadn’t moved- leaning back into the cushions, head resting on top, eyes fixed on the ceiling- expression unreadable, but Vitali knew he was mostly just trying to catch his breath.
He had punched Matvey. It’d given Vitali a visceral reaction- but he was unsure why.
He kept his eyes on the ripperdoc as the events from earlier began replaying in his head. He did not understand why Matvey had let them walk away again; did not understand why it had been so easy to get him to stop. He doubted Matvey had been so moved by what Vitali had said to him that it had changed his mind- no, it had all been planned, like a game of chess, once again one step ahead of him-
But for what? Why had it been so easy?
Vitali felt his heartbeat begin to speed up again and quickly redirected his attention to the TV, biting the inside of his cheek until he tasted blood. But if anything, it made him feel worse; the news was showing footage of the attacks of earlier that day and his stomach turned.
A fixer, dead. Plenty of mercenaries as well- some well-known names even, though Vitali had not even bothered to ask who the fixer in question was. Nobody on the Council at least- he wouldn’t have stopped hearing about it if so.
He knew Matvey had bigger plans for all of Night City, yet for some reason he still felt responsible. It was still his father, after all- but at the same time his father’s problems with the city were not Vitali’s fault. Not in the slightest.
The others were talking too loud. Too much noise surrounding him- and his breath got caught in his throat and his eyes started burning again, tears welling up in the corners as his environment finally overwhelmed him to the point he felt like he was going to either throw up or pass out.
No situation had ever done this to him before. The aftermath of the Heist came close; yet somehow this was worse, much worse, and drawing comparisons with the failed gig from the year before was not helping either.
‘Vitali? I think you should…turn on the TV for a sec.’
Vitali blinked upon hearing Lauren’s voice and he quickly regained himself, exhaling sharply as he pushed the thoughts out of his head. He walked over to the coffee table, then grabbed the remote and turned up the volume. The second he did, the others all went quiet instantly and directed their attention to it as well.
‘Lauren, what’s happening? Talk to me,’ Vitali said, not patient enough to try and piece the situation together from listening to the reporter.
‘NCPD’s investigating the attacks, MaxTac on the scene as well,’ Lauren quickly replied. ‘Looking into the source of the problem- where the mercs are coming from.’
A silence washed over the room and the puzzle pieces slowly began clicking together in Vitali’s head, and a sharp exhale left his body as he stumbled back until he hit the wall next to the window he’d been standing at.
‘They don’t have much to go on, but the Council does,’ Lauren quietly continued. ‘Pickin’ up chatter from within the network- lots of your old mercenaries, right?’
She did not need to say more, really.
‘They’re tracing the attacks back to you, jefe.’
No.
Vitali shook his head, as if Lauren could see him; as if it would change anything; as if it would set everything right. And he laughed- truly it was just a joke, right? The Council couldn’t really believe that he was behind all this; why would they?
He looked at his friends, and the smile faded from his face. They were all looking at him- some worried- some scared.
Were they scared of him?
‘What are they saying?’ Vitali quietly asked, eyes finding Vincent’s; his boyfriend could not hold his gaze and quickly looked away.
‘Talkin’ about your time with Arasaka. Both when you worked for them, and- last year. I get the sense they don’t know what happened there. Don’t know about the brainwashing.’
‘Rogue knows, she was there!’ A pause, a deep breath. No need to raise his voice. ‘I- I’m sorry. Can you connect me through?’
‘Don’t think so. It’s not a direct connection- just tellin’ you what I’m picking up “he-said-that-she-said” style. I can ping them to arrange a meeting, if you’d like?’
Vitali was no longer able to answer her.
He took everything from us.
He slowly walked forward, eyes still locked on the TV screen as it showed him footage of the burning docks of Wellsprings. Each step he took, his leg protested painfully, and he nearly lost his balance a couple of times.
The Council blaming Vitali for these attacks would have dire consequences for him, and he was well aware. The sole purpose of the gathering of fixers was to ensure the safety of the innocent people of Night City, and if they believed Vitali was behind the attacks they would put a price on his head.
He would lose everything.
‘He isn’t trying to kill you,’ Viktor suddenly quietly said, and Vitali couldn’t stop a single tear from rolling down his cheek.
‘He’s trying to take everything away from you.’
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amplexadversary · 1 year
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sanstropfremir · 2 years
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I love the fact that Yunho stayed true to his artistry throughout the years. Sadly the same can’t be said for younger male idols like Taemin or Kai, in my opinion, who strayed so far away from what we saw of them doing in their groups. And it got me thinking; how much of it is them and how much of it is SM’s marketing strategy? How can their group self and solo self be soooo different? For me they’re not selling their solo self well enough to convince me that that them you know what I am? It feels almost like they’re acting (yes, every performer acts a little bit) but with Kai and Taemin it looks like they’re both playing a role…
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#i genuinely do not know how to answer this sldkfsdkljfsldkjf#but you probably should have read more than one post on my blog before you sent this#considering i 1) have several of the top posts in the taemin meta tag#and 2) one of the things i talk about quite frequently is about HOW ACTING IS IMPORTANT TO GOOD PERFORMANCE#unironically: do you think every idol is totally genuine in their performances? and that 'playing a role' means something is bad art??#bc if you do you need to get a grip real quick darling bc i can guarantee that even yunho is 'playing a role'#...do you not think that human beings have depth??? that they can want to portray more than one thing in different performances???#look. if you dont like taemin and kai's solo work that's totally fine. you are allowed to have your opinions and disliking things is fine#but to say that neither of them are 'selling' their work well enough to you bc it 'looks like theyre acting'??????#kindly but what the fuck is wrong with you#what the fuck else do you want them to DO????????#taemin especially has talked a LOT on many separate occasions for many years now about how much artistic input he has and how he makes work#also also: literally WHO CARES if its sm marketing??  i'm here for the music and for the performances not some weird parasocial shit#i am under no impression that i know anything about these artists' personal lives or what theyre really like and i dont care to know#all i care about is the work that gets produced and if its good or not#text#answers#i cant believe someone had the audacity to send ME. A TRAINED THEATRE PROFESSIONAL!! the phrase ''yes every performer acts a little bit''#do you hear yourself. do you.#i almost thought this was bait bc you literally managed to hit every point i would strongly disagree with you on#like some kind of perverse internet argument bingo. i feel like i should applaud you. well done!#hall of fame asks
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*running in circles, bouncing off the walls*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am having many Emotions.
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siren-of-agony · 2 months
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Had a talk w my profs/employers earlier about renewing my contract where one of the things we talked about how I missed so many of the Thursday-group-meetings cause I was sick/had doctors appointments.
We also agreed to have another talk on our next meeting.
Just had to email them to tell them I couldn't make it bc I remembered I had a neurologist appointment that day.
Stay tuned to see if I lose my job I guess :D
#Tbf I feel like it's coming to its end anyways#I'm technically almost done w my degree but the few things I'm missing I don't feel able to do bc of my disability#And they only want to employ me / legally can keep me a student as long as I intend to finish which I am but like... Idk if I can do it#But their patience is running out and also at one point the uni will kick me out so#Anyways I'm extremely anxious now and sometimes telling someone what makes me anxious helps me get rid of the thought spiral#But I don't want to tell an individual cause then I actually have to talk about it so that's why I'm making this rant post#Anyways love my avoidant style of problem solving which doesn't actually solve any problems but just makes them worse and worse#Has worked out great for me the last 300000 times I did it#Which is actually funny to say cause like most of the time it did actually work out but just would have been immensly easier if I did it#Right away#But still every time I feel like the world will end#.... Maybe I should go back to therapy#It's been 2 years so I think I could again?#Would love to go to my last therapist bc she really helped me while I worked w her but it'd also be extremely embarrassing to be like#Hey girl remember like t h e thing we worked on for 2 years and I made great progress w? Well guess who just let it get extremely bad again#Granted this time it's not just my avoiding but my memory slash concentration issues due to my fatigue also play an extremely big role
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moongothic · 7 months
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DIN'T YOU SEE OFFICAL ACC OF OPLA? THEY COOK SOMETHING RIGHT AND PLAYING WITH US LIKE CAT WITH SOME CATNIP
Anon I need you to be slightly more specific because I'm stupid and either have the wrong account or I just don't get it, regardless the latest tweet from them is just this
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And it ain't doing much for me
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edwinspaynes · 22 days
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I was angry. I'm still angry. But sadness and exhaustion have overtaken that anger, and I have A LOT to say about this.
Dead Boy Detectives is a very special show to me. It occupies a ridiculously large place in my heart, and it's brought me joy in a way that only a few pieces of media ever have. When I watched it for the first time, Edwin Payne had my heart within minutes. By the end of episode one, Charles Rowland did, too.
It meant a lot to me, seeing such wonderful and nuanced queer characters brought to life in the type of paranormal story I have always loved. In these past months, Edwin and Charles have felt like real friends to me, and to never see them again without a satisfying conclusion to their story is something I have not truly processed. Same for Niko and Crystal and The Cat King - they should be back. But I haven't fully processed it yet, that they're not coming back, and yet I am still aggreived.
@netflix is, at this point, so fucking gagged on capitalism's dick that they're not even pretending to care about art anymore. Dead Boy Detectives is genuinely masterfully made on just about every level. The actors did a phenomenal job and I will be following all their careers heavily. Steve, Beth, and the writing team crafted an incredible tale. The sets, the lighting, the props, the effects were all on point. This was a well-constructed program, and you could tell that everyone involved with the project gave it their all because they cared so deeply.
(Also my heart breaks for the whole cast, but it's hardcore hurting for George since this was not only his first screen role but one he clearly thought he would be keeping as of two weeks ago. He seemed so secure. I hate this for him.)
In addition to being a good show, DBDA had good reception. It's got a 92% on Rotten Tomatoes, was on the Top 10 for several weeks, got 4.7 million views within week one, and was getting daily articles posted on various review sites with NOTHING but praise. The fandom is incredibly active. We trend on Tumblr like five times a week and on Twitter regularly as well.
THE. SCRIPT. FOR. SEASON. 2. WAS. WRITTEN.
What the fuck happened?
Idiot executives at @netflix, choking on the dick of capitalism, probably just thought that they wouldn't get new subscribers for a second season of an existing show that didn't rake in Bridgerton-level cash. That's how they work - people who are interested in it are already subscribers, so who the fuck cares about them? Better to make some other shit, hope new people subscribe, and maybe that'll be a Bridgerton-level hit.
But also, Netflix has fun little trends to look into. And, when you look at the lineup of shows Netflix has canceled, they are overwhelmingly queer. The homophobia of @netflix and their operatives is clearly boundless, and it hits here really badly because this show was clearly made with a queer audience in mind. It was one of the most authentic pieces of queer media I have ever experienced, if not THE most authentic pieces of queer media that I have ever experienced.
It's fucking ridiculous that Netflix canceled a show that they commissioned a completed script of months ago. It sucks that they decided that their existing subscribers, their queer subscribers, did not matter.
Edwin and Charles are ours now. Well, of course, they're George's and Jayden's respectively, but the characters are no longer Netflix's to use and throw out. They're ours now, our fandom's, and we all love them so much.
And we deserved to see more of them, and we deserved to see their love story play out onscreen, but I for one am not going anywhere. Let's give Edwin and Charles - and the rest of the gang - millions of versions of the stories and endings that Netflix deprived them of.
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cosmicplexus · 5 months
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Random Astrology Observations
🌻I wasn't feeling lazy today so this is a bit longer than the usual observation posts🌻
🦋And finally the pricing catalogue is here...at the end of the observations 🦋
Thank you so much my sunflowers🌻your support has been everything. I try my best to respond to your messages and requests. If you haven't received a response, I'm coming 🤍✨
And I tried my best to be reasonable with the prices. Also, I'm not yet doing full chart readings as I am a student with two majors and I'm already struggling with balancing things. In time I will do them. Free one question culture requests are still open, but please don't request for things you see on the pricing catalogue like a big three reading...
I don't want to bore you all too much so here we go🧚🏾‍♀️🦋🌻✨
Astrology Notes...
~4th house Gemini makes for someone who develops family-like bonds in friendships.
~taurus risings tend to be possessive due to the influence of their scorpio 7th house.
~pluto at angular houses 1st, 7th, 4th and 10th is a huge indicator of someone who has had intense experiences in the respective key areas of life and there's spiritual lessons to be learnt regarding that area through transformation.
~libra venus placements may find it really hard to stay single
~7° and 19° venus or moon signs may struggle with the theme of physical perfection and wanting to attain it.
~virgo moons have a tendency of creating problems if they don't have any current ones to solve
~capricorn risings really do look older in their younger days and younger when they're older.
~moon and neptune in 1st house natives may give off the perception that they need saving and may attract people with a martyrdom complex.
~sagittarius, 9th house, 9° and 21° mercuries may have an affinity to music in foreign languages while cancer, 4th house, 4°,16°,28° may enjoy music in their mother tongue
~jupiter in 2nd house and 10th house is heavy lotto winner vibes. Literally and figuratively.
~mercury in 2nd house and at Taurean degrees(2°,14° and 26°) are the born singers
~the 22nd degree is an underrated fame degree...I have a bey's🐝 fame analysis I've been sitting on for a while. That's a conversation for another day.
~pisces venus and mars are the most romantic people in the world which makes me kind of believe the astrology theory of neptune being the higher frequency of venus.
~leo moons really take their hair seriously and may feel out of loop if their hair is not well done.
~want to easily impress a cancer mars man??? Sing praises to your mom. Be dotting around kids.
~girls with 9th house, 9° and 21° Venus are so magically beautiful. Abundance of beauty.
~To a decent degree, liberation of women in society came at the expense of gemini, sagittarius and aquarius venus women being slut-shamed(This is not at all saying other women did not contribute to the liberation of women 🌻✨ That's a conversation for another day)
~neptune plays a huge role in beauty trends and that's why neptune dominant women are usually the beauty influencers which explains why beauty standards are mutable and ever changing.
~jupiter in 7th house can go two ways... extreme luck in meaningful relationships or someone who never has serious relationships and is forever on the look...
~pisces/12th house mercuries and mercury afflicted by neptune are often under fire for being the liars when the real culprit is the sagittarius/9th house mercuries and mercury-jupiter hard aspects.
~I personally view the north node as a jupiter variant. While the general consensus is that it is the purpose we're working for, I do believe that it's also an indicator of our birthrights, innate gifts and where we're lucky.
~Cosmic Plexus🌻🤍
§~PRICE CATALOGUE~§ ~PAID READINGS COMMENCE ON THE 16th of May 2024 🦋DETAILED BIG THREE READING ~ $6.00
🦋5 IN-DEPTH SYNASTRY QUESTIONS READING ~ $9.00 🦋OVERALL SYNASTRY ADVICE ~ $3.00
🦋SPIRITUALITY AND PURPOSE FOCUSED READING ~ $6.00 🦋CAREER ADVICE ~ $3.00 🦋 RELATIONSHIP REMEDY TIPs $3.00
Let me know your thoughts...
~Cosmic Plexus🤍✨🌻🦋©️
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