#idk why i'm still a part of tumblr fandom culture

[multiversemittens]

I'm fucking sick of this belief of 'healthy ships are boring' or 'healthy relationships are only for real life'. Ok so I can't like a healthy fictional relationship without being shamed for it? I can't avoid toxic ships because of my personal traumas without being called boring? Grow the fuck up. Whatever happened to letting people like what they like?

[daughter-of-sapph0]

I think a lot of transfemme culture is formed and cultivated by how we were rejected and desperately tried to fit it.

like, take transfemme memes. a lot of memes are about how broad generalizations such as "trans women do this thing", the thing being computer programming or enjoying a particular video game. and while I won't deny that a lot of trans women do those things, the vast majority don't. so why are things like programmer socks and fallout new vegas and bionicals and gundam so popular with trans women despite them not being universally applicable?

I think it might have to do with our being rejected as kids and how we would do everything we could to try and be accepted by others.

maybe this only applies to me. I'm definitely not trying to make a broad generalization to explain other broad generalizations. I'm basing this primarily on my experiences.

but when I was in middle school and high school, I used to lie about watching certain movies or playing certain games even when I didn't. I could have been because my parents wouldn't let me, I couldn't afford them, or I just wasn't actually interested. but most of what I was interested was very niche nerdy things like anime and computers and math and art. but in a desperate attempt to join in conversations and make friends, I would lie and say I was interested in the popular things so other people would accept me.

now, years later, the internet connects us and helps us explore our nerdy interests much more. I remember I was the only person at high school who cared at all about undertale, but then I found tumblr and whole communities online who would talk about the game I played. they also got me interested in things I never would have been into otherwise. transgender people online got me into star wars (which I regret) and evangelion (which I also regret but not as much). and there are some things that I've never experienced, but still know about due to cultural osmosis. I know a lot about fallout new vegas and magic the gathering and ultrakill despite never playing them. I would consider myself part of those fandoms despite never really interacting with the content, just because I have so many online trans friends who are into those things.

I think that the most popular things just happened to become transfemme memes due to how many nerdy trans people unapologetically love them online, and people who have never experienced them but are friends with the people who do love them agree with them to fit in.

I'm not saying this is a bad thing. it's perfectly fine to be part of a fandom or community even if you don't have a huge interest in it just to be with your friends. I'm not super interested in ttrpgs, but I still play just because I like hanging out with my friends.

computer programming is popular in trans women circles not because all trans women are computer programmers. it's popular because it's a booming industry and the small percentage of trans women who are computer programmers really enjoy it and talk about it online, and their online friends support them and agree with them even if they aren't computer programmers themselves.

idk. I forget where I was going with this. I just think it's really nice how trans women, and honestly the entire queer community as a whole, tends to support each other's niche interests and uplift each other.

[justalilguyoops]

What made you think about writing LAWS in the reverse perspective? Felix being obsessive and Ollie being....less

omg.....this is such a good question!!!! hello anon and thank you for this hehehe

okay so I'm pretty sure i had a eureka, light bulb over the head moment but I don't remember what or when exactly it was

BUT! there were a few things that led up to it! I wasn't originally planning on doing another fic and definitely not a long fic, but idk i think i was possessed probably

one of the things that made me go "huh. interesting idea" was reading a post on tumblr about how Felix probably thinks he's in a romcom, how his party outfit is reminiscent of Baz Luhrmann's Juliet in R&J. So that got me thinking about the film from Felix's perspective.

Another thing that also caught my attention is how much this fandom (and me) eats up an obsessive/possessive/jealous lil bitch Felix. I also think there's proof in the film that Felix IS possessive over Oliver.

Barry Keoghan's rizz was also another factor. I can't remember what video or what really triggered it, but I thinkkkk maybe his Hot Ones interview? But I think there was another video way before that too that gave me the initial idea, since I think LAWS originally sprouted in my brain like....20 chapters before WIPIP ended.

I was just like "wow....his power...." and I do think Oliver had like a bit of his charisma, but...what if....i dialed it up to Barry Keoghan's innate level? what if oliver had that goin awn?

I also came up with the line in chapter 7, where Oliver asks if Vee is pretty and when Felix gets defensive and asks why, oliver just responds with "Figured. Y’know, because you are."

i wanted....to use that....so badly once my brain produced it

Oxford days of the film also particularly captivated me, mainly the moments of the montage. The guitar scene was a HUGE contributing factor for me wanting to write LAWS in Oxford days.

why did I do LAWS in modern day?

Primarily because I wanted Felix to vape. truly. that was like the main reason.

Along with just a generally more accepting culture of LGBTQIA+, cellphones, and social media. I wanted to make all of them even worse by giving them access to tiktok <3

So, more or less, I did want to write LAWS as a college romcom, something much lighter and totally different from WIPIP.

I wanted to do it from Felix's POV because WIPIP was more predominantly Oliver (despite switching POV each chapter; it was still very much Oliver's story and we all tended to view the story as a whole from his POV).

The reversal of role was motivated by Felix being the possessive one first!!! This was a SUPER long answer and I'm going to include a bit more beneath this, but warning: It contains spoilers for PART ONE of LAWS!

DON'T READ BELOW IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED LAWS PART ONE!

------

I was also just really interested in exploring the Quick family. In the film, we view them as kind people who care about their son, which y'know, makes oliver look terrible for his lies.

HOWEVER! There has to be a reason that Oliver is what he is. Obviously, people develop individuality on their own and not everything is a product of nurture vs. nature, but I do believe that there's something to that. Parts of us can be a product of our environment.

Also, if you've read my past writing, you know I really enjoy religious themes, specifically Christianity.

Fun fact, but I am and have been atheist my whole life, my whole family is. I've never attended a church service.

BUT i am extremely fascinated by it (which def reflects in my writing lol) and enjoy exploring all the ideas, stories, and culture. I did notice in the film that Paula wears a cross necklace, which kinda indicates that they are religious in some variation.

What if the Quicks always knew that Oliver was bisexual? What if they never spoke of it? Oliver, always on his own at school. Never had any friends. Why were his parents OKAY with that?

Personally, if my parents noticed something like that they'd want to have a conversation with me or my school: was I being bullied? were there any issues on the playground? why did I not have any friends?

Instead, Paula uses excuses of him being "so clever", kind of brushing off her son's loneliness? idk, they very clearly love their son, but there are some little indications that Oliver struggled in his youth and his parents never really addressed it? (obviously all of this is just a theory and think i've kinda come up with)

SOOOOO i wanted to investigate that in modern day. The kind of outdated and conservative ideals of a religious family and their bisexual son. (of course still happens all over the world, but in my personal life I feel like I don't hear about this experience as often. I live on the west coast of the USA which I think is a contributing factor)

AND I WANT TO SAY I hope that my stories and references to religion are never harmful to those that are religious. I try hard to be respectful and honest with information.

I find religions to be super interesting and never intend to be insensitive! I try to do a lot of research, but obviously as someone kinda standing outside and looking in, I may get things wrong.

I don't intend for LAWS to be disrespectful towards Christianity; I'm merely trying to write a story about what has and is happening to many LGBTQIA+ youths in strict religious households. I know of many religious families that unequivocally love their queer children, but there's always the other side of the coin.

anyways!!! longest answer ever!!! sorry for this word vomit!!! and thank you again for such a wonderful question hehe

[majorbaby]

very very long rant

when i first left tumblr after the porn ban, the sjw stuff was starting to plateau, but you still had big bloggers ironically calling themselves misandrists in bio. I say ironically because unlike an open misogynist, an open misandrist cannot amass vast structural power, they instead will remain on the fringes of society. before they can even be shunned in the mainstream or the elite, they're being shunned by their own peers.

at that time, there was a lot of popular blogs run by (sometimes allegedly) racialized people or "poc-run spaces" like thisisnot[country] and blogs specifically dedicated to pointing out cultural appropriation. i personally contributed to the reclaimthebindi which in retrospect seemed inspired by blackout selfie day (not to be confused with thr subsequent 'blackout' posts associated with BLM - that was later), altho idk to what extent the south asian diasporic community (of which i am a part of) actually paid homage to the black blogger/s responsible for blackout day.

now many of those blogs are defunct or have been scrubbed from level-one searches of tumblr, and their history has not been well documented. it's hard to understand what the climate was unless you were there because not many secondary sources, like the one you're reading right now i suppose, exist. or they weren't well-circulated. this one won't be, i'm turning off reblogs i think.

this is, in my opinion, in contrast to other major trends in internet culture that inform offline social justice movements. that's your gxmxrgxte (so well-ingrained in my memory that it still upsets me enough to censor today), metoo and the annual around ao3's right to host any and all content with very limited few exceptions.

reclaimthebindi is still up, so are a few of the thisisnot blogs, but you can't really tell that they were all interconnected, a part of the same zeitgeist. i have a few theories as to why, and which one you pick depends on how generous you are when imagining the people who ran these blogs. some of them for sure were run by bored college students seeking an outlet. some of them were denied recognition by their offline peers because of racism, so it felt good to find a space where they could actually amass social capital on the basis of the very thing that disadvantaged them in every other space. some were concerned with punitive justice, others with restorative justice. some just posted black and brown bodies so that those images would exist on the internet somewhere. some were run by racefacing white people who also felt like outcasts offline, and saw a quick and easy way to be embraced elsewhere. it's possible that some people did it for a combination of these reasons.

whatever benefits there may have been, it wasn't enough to keep the momentum going. very few put out 'retirement' statements, most just stopped posting and were eventually purged. tbh, i see the draw in airing your grievances all in one place, but it's exhausting, and eventually your supporters grow tired of the negativity, and you grow tired of the negativity too. that's why i think it's usually better to stick to posting and sharing the stuff you love, not the stuff you hate, or at least, find a balance. though their presence is much, much smaller, creator networks for women, lgtbq, and racialized people have sprung up, and so have spaces where people post and repost art that engages with class, race, gender etc.

but it still feels like racialized people have a much quieter voice on tumblr. i have to rely on stumbling upon them naturally, which is next to impossible, especially if you're on tumblr for a small to medium sized fandom, which i think most fandoms are these days. your supermassive fandoms - doctor who, sherlock, kpop, harry potter, the mcu, also no longer dominate the site. i would still say tumblr is the big fandom site, but a lower user count means that the internet's fandom site is smaller than before.

so, less users in general, and any existing minority shrinks. and if we're talking racialized people who are lgtbq, that's an even smaller minority.

this in my opinion has contributed in a major way to the backlash against feminism, the idea that "terfs ruined feminism" with the subtle suggestion that feminism has perhaps failed, or was never really good to begin with, and a laser focus on terfs as the ones responsible as though the mainstream, patriarchal, cis-heteronormative bloc had absolutely nothing to do with it. or the ludicrous idea that terfs are the mainstream, patriarchal cis-heteronormative bloc. two things can be bad, that doesn't mean they're the same thing.

anyway! a big part of the original tumblr feminist movement was not just the "poc run blog" but in the "woc run blog". "poc" was absorbed into BIPOC, and "woc" is a legacy term. your woc were regularly venting about how being a woman of colour means choosing between your race and your gender, putting up with the misogyny of the racialized men in your life who you show up for constantly but who throw you under the bus when the white man asks them how high to jump. now there's white lgbtq bloggers all over the place asking whether you "include black and brown men when you said you say men are trash?" (yes, i absolutely am) and if you ask that question to a room full of white people, they're all going to keep their mouths shut because they don't want to appear racist.

well, white men do not have a monopoly on misogyny. misogyny levied at racialized women by racialized men is a huge intra-community barrier to trying to organize against racism and white supremacy. it is extremely upsetting to see white people suggest that racialized women, lgbtq people and children are not oppressed by the racialized men in their own communities. that we are not survivors of domestic abuse, sexual abuse or that we do not endure oppression under patriarchy in the home, workplace and in society inflicted upon us by our own kin, which compounds upon what we already absorb from white people.

and they can go on doing so on here because many racialized women have shut up and gone away. even running blogs aimed around celebrating themselves has become a service to white consumers that they've done thanklessly for years. just to hear that actually, they have no right to say "men are trash" because what if the brown man that abused them or their mom or their aunties overhears and gets his feelings hurt. didn't we discern the difference between hurt feelings and systemic oppression almost fifteen years ago on tumblr dot com?

like, sure, maybe we should adjust "women only spaces" to be "spaces for women and trans people" but we can do that and not pretend that we have absolutely no idea why women live in fear of men, or that a reasonable amount of fear is completely unwarranted.

man it is one thing to come back here to find all the, admittedly, sometimes kind of annoying sjw blogs around race gone, and another to see a resurgence of popular MRA talking points. but i see how that's happened. racialized women are done talking about this, and who can blame them. white women, and i wish i only meant cis women, get slapped with 'terf' the second they open their mouths, so they are also done talking about this.

if you managed to read all of this please be a little careful when reblogging posts that are critical of feminism. yes, there are a few bad-faith actors within feminism, but feminists in general are a minority group, even if it doesn't feel that way on tumblr. think about it, how long has it been since you saw someone with 'feminist' in bio? is it a good thing to keep facilitating this growing resentment against feminism? has feminism done nothing for us? should we toss it out with the bathwater?

[douwatahima]

idk i'm feeling kinda riled up today and i want to talk about why the fight for ofmd is so important to me.

so listen. i've been in fandoms for a loooooong time. i remember when the sheer idea of a show (that wasn't something like, say, queer as folk) having any sort of lgbt representation was a major rarity. the idea of a random character suddenly coming out in your favourite sci fi/fantasy/action show? no way in hell. and those of us in fandom kinda came to accept that. we were queering the hell out of everything we came across, don't get me wrong, but it was because the idea of a series suddenly having a character textually be queer was just…not a thing that happened most of the time.

then came the age of queerbaiting. as someone who was in the supernatural fandom from very early on, i remember how those first few seasons of the ~great destiel saga~ felt to watch. they actively hinted at and joked about their relationship! they acknowledged the elephant in the room! surely they wouldn't do that unless it meant something!!! but then of course came the years and years of the cast and crew sneering at the people who had the audacity to…listen to the words that came out of the character's mouths and have thoughts about them. and yeah, eventually (like a decade later) cas told dean he loved him, but even now the people who worked on the show seem reluctant to say that that was a romantic moment. and that's just one example that i'm more intimately familiar with! there are so many others! just straight up gaslighting queer fans so they can keep making money off of us with no intention of actually giving us what we want; all while acting like they were doing us a favour by doing anything at all.

and it sucked! it clearly sucked! but the more time went on the less surprising it became. because at the end of the day it came down to what it always comes down to; money. there's this idea (not just in media) that there are certain people who are the "default". people whose experiences are universal and easy to understand. white people. straight people. cis people. when it comes to media, stories about these people are seen as something anyone can watch and understand. but when you try to tell stories about people who fall outside of these categories? well, now you're making niche content that only people who fall into that niche will be able to identify with.

and look, i know i'm preaching to the choir here. this is tumblr. we all know there's a lot of racism, sexism, homophobia, and transphobia in the world. my point is that the narrative around queerbaiting from an industry standpoint seemed to be "yeah, we want the ad revenue from all of these lgbt people watching our shows, but if we commit to actually making any of our characters queer we're going to isolate our straight audience and lose most of our viewers". and there was never any concrete way to disprove that. so yeah. we would occasionally be blessed by a ~very special show~ that actually depicted queerness (usually about younger people coming out, or about the tragedies that can and have faced people in our community), but the idea of branching out beyond that seemed like a no go.

and then along came our flag means death. a show about pirates that also talked about toxic masculinity and had characters who were casually queer in every different variety and also featured people with different body types who came from different cultures and who were all treated with kindness and grace. a show that didn't necessarily market itself specifically as ~a queer show~ (which, was probably in part due to trying to bury the lead which sucks, but the point still stands) but rather a fun show anyone could watch. that wasn't specifically about coming out or tragedy but was more so about joy, and community, and love. and here's the thing. here's the wild as fuck thing that happened. this show? it didn't lose all of its viewers when those last two episodes of season 1 aired and it confirmed without a shadow of a doubt that ed and stede were in love. the opposite happened. this show fucking soared into the stratosphere.

i remember the first time i saw those parrot analytics charts showing that ofmd was the most in demand new series; out performing marvel even. i was so overcome i legit broke down in tears. because it turns out all of those times i had been told to sit back and accept the scraps i was given because that was all my community was profitable enough to get, those people were wrong. we could've had this the whole time! WE COULD'VE HAD THIS THE WHOLE TIME!!! and as the weeks progressed and ofmd remained at the top of every chart, as the show continued to succeed, i felt such an immense amount of joy! those people were wrong! we can just have this and it'll do well!!!

and yeah, apparently that wasn't enough to convince the powers that be. they spent forever deciding whether to renew it and when they finally did the budget was cut nearly in half and the people at max decided they needed to oversee the show a lot more. all of this sucks. but the thing is they made season 2 and they fucking did it again! the show got even better critics scores than last time! the show was doing numbers better than season 3 of succession! the merch, only released in october, became some of the best selling merch of 2023 on the max shop! by max's own admission season 2 was one of the biggest hits of the year for them!!! like, what more is there? the show is a success!!!

so yeah. i'm not going to accept the fucking stupid excuses max gives as to why they cancelled it. saying that it didn't have the numbers (it did), or that they didn't know how to market violence (they do), or that it didn't have awards buzz (it has literally been nominated for awards and there's still active fyc ads the company itself made) just doesn't cut it. there was no reason to cancel it other than the idea that diverse media "doesn't sell". and max, by airing this show you have shown me that that fucking isn't true. it's never been true. so i'm going to keep fighting for this one until someone picks it up or until i'm old and grey because it isn't just about ofmd. it's about the belief that our stories, the stories of people who aren't "the default" are worth telling. by every metric they are worth telling. and that is something that i know is worth fighting for.

[korrasamibottles]

Long tag game!! Thanks @nova-leaf @lilrobinbird for tagging me💖

How many tumblr accounts have you had before this one?

Just one! I made it in 2012 to look at Walking Dead and Supernatural gifs and eventually it just turned into a personal blog. I met two of my best friends there!! Unfortunately I'm locked out of it for now because I decided to be a responsible internet enjoyer and changed all my passwords and I uhh. I can't remember what I changed it to. And the email I used to sign up 12 years ago is long dead. So that blog might be gone forever. Life is a highway I'm gonna ride it all night long etc. etc.

How long have you been in fandom?

I had really intense Supernatural and MCU phases back in the day, and binged TLOK and ATLA in 2015 after the Korra finale (I watched Korra first and then atla, and I maintain that's the best way to do it😌) but I never really participated in the fandom, like I never talked to anyone or made anything. So I'm gonna say I've been in fandom since summer 2023 when I made this blog to post my tlok fic (couldn't post it on my old one. My face is/was all over it. You understand.) Everyone I've interacted with here is like. Shockingly nice. Idk why I expected to be beaten with hammers but umm it didn't happen so thank you all for that💖

Your favorite trope in fiction?

AND THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED!!!!! Also rivals coming together to fight a common enemy and then maybe coming together in a different way.....? That's good too.

Your favorite random fact?

There are vast, delicate fungal networks in the earth beneath our feet right now as we speak :) They wrap around tree roots and spread far and wide, connecting multiple trees with each other and allowing them to share water and nutrients. This is especially helpful for saplings, which often aren't able to get enough sunlight to make their own sugars. The fungal network helps ensure the survival of young trees, and in exchange it gets a share in the nutrients being passed between the trees!!!

Your favourite game or kind of game?

Saw trap.

A place you’d like to visit? (If carbon emissions, logistics and money weren’t in question)

Oh god literally anywhere. I want to get marinated in every culture and environment I think that would blow my mind in the best way. I do want to make it to Italy specifically at some point in my life because apparently I have cousins there? But then again what if they're weird and I don't actually want to meet them.....

An animal you’re irrationally afraid of?

I can't really think of any? As a kid I was terrified of big dogs, but that fear is like 99% gone now. Sometimes other people have their dogs off leash in the woods and I gotta say. I Do Not Like It when they come running up snarling barking jumping with their hair raised at me. But the vast majority of dogs are I encounter are nice, and when they aren't I just try to ignore them and keep walking lol.

What’s your favourite season?

Autumn 10000% and then winter. Then spring. Then summer. I hate being hot.

A smell that brings you nice memories?

So maybe this is weird but I really like the way horses smell? I was a farm girl growing up and always loved horses....a horse bit the top of my head once...a different horse broke my arm......still love them.

(If you’re ok talking about food. If not, delete this part) What’s your favorite food from where you were born? And what’s your favorite food from some place else?

My mom's Italian so it was all pasta all the time growing up...lasagna😭 Also chicken cacciatore but the pasta isn't the main event there. But yeah. Pasta tomato garlic basil.....I'm there babiee.

I'm also obsessed with Indian food and there's a place near me that has a vegetable korma that makes me cry.

What’s your favorite drink (if you drink alcohol, alcoholic and non-alcoholic)?

I don't drink alcohol anymore but I loooooooved rum & coke. Also hard cider.

As for regular drinks. I am 75% fruit juice by volume at all times.

Do you give your pets random table scraps?

My cat is a huge freak who turns her nose up at human food like she's literally too good for it. Sometimes I'll offer her a piece of cheese and she'll lick it, but that's it.

I don't know who has and hasn't been tagged already so if you want to do this. Do it🫵

[nono-bunny]

Why do you people even watch ATLA if makes so many of you miserable?

WHEN did I ever say it makes me miserable lmao

So. First of all? I literally first watched/got to know this show as a kid alongside my little brother, tuning in to random episodes rather than watching it all in order on my own. I always respected it and thought it was cool, but it took me a bit to watch it all properly, and by that time I already watched the finale, had the inkling it was dumb, and when I watched everything that feeling was only strengthed

Like? Idk who you are but your question seems to imply you're a new fan coming in from the 2020 ATLA renaissance, and it's important to remember that's super not the case for a lot people. I grew up with the show! I keep rewatching it every couple of years! Not because I hate it and I want to get mad, but because I do genuinely love like, 90% of it- and most of the stuff I hate about it, and a lot of my anger towards it was born MUCH later than my first watchthrough. When you watch something you enjoy a whole bunch of times and get familiar with it, of course you're also gonna become aware of its flaws! And, as much as I hate having to say it, Aang as a character IS the show's biggest flaw- he doesn't carry his weight as the show's protagonist, and kid me could sense it, while adult me can now look at him and say WHY.

ATLA fan culture is a bit problematic in the sense that it's been put on such a high pedestal that it can seem weird when people criticize it, but like? There are parts of it that are DESERVING of criticism, heck, pretty much all of the people who worked on it who've spoken about it in the years since would agree that there are some stuff that either didn't age well or weren't well made in the first place, like- being critical of something or hating some aspects of it doesn't mean you hate the whole thing!!!

Fr if I didn't enjoy ATLA at all I wouldn't ever bother rewatching it, or engaging with the fandom, or consuming fan content... But I obviously do, given that I'm here speaking about it YEARS after I first saw it, because it resonated with me, and I love it! Even if I'm still mad as fuck about a lot of stuff that happened in the franchise over the years (and the finale, the can't be stressed enough), that doesn't detract from the fact that there are still more stuff about it that I love than I don't... Even if I tend to talk about the bad stuff because they make me ranty and I have to release all my thoughts somewhere else I'd explode lol. Btw, before I started being more active on Tumblr I'd just bombard my best friend with my thoughts on shit they'd never seen/played/experience so. Tumblr is genuinely just a good place for this because sometimes people see my thoughts and agree, sometimes they don't and it's all chill honestly

Watching ATLA for the most part makes me really happy, actually! But there are a selection of episodes that make me mad, and like? If you're not up to seeing less stellar reviews of the show, THERE'S A REASON I TAG EVERYTHING!! You can just block "anti___" tags, I respect that not everyone agrees with my takes on the show, and I specifically take care that they won't have to see them if they don't want to, so, really... Unless you ACTUALLY wanna have a discussion about my issues with the show, wouldn't it have been so much easier to just block either me or the tags and move on rather than question my enjoyment of something I dearly love for like, no reason whatsoever? Oh well whatever this was kinda a funny ask to get, thanks for the laugh lol "you people" cracked me up

[quillsmora]

2, 3, 8, 9, 10, 20, 23

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

idk how compelling this is but the reason i think it's so hard for me to write gamora as a bottom is that she was never really given power/control growing up, so the fact that she has it in the bedroom is very liberating and makes her a lot more comfortable. i think she could be very switchy but i personally could never write her as strictly a bottom.

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

don't have a screenshot but any variation of "gamora's ending was good actually you're all just mad that she didn't end up back with quill and that's misogynistic" posts. that's not why we're mad and also wanting to see a female character be in a romantic relationship is not misogynistic at all?? need people to unlearn the 2016 buzzfeed "being a strong female character™️ means you cannot have any romantic connections ever" brand of feminism (which is not actually feminism, idk what it actually is but it's something along the lines of girlboss capitalism pushed by male hollywood executives).

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

i don't see rocket as groot's dad. i feel like peter fulfills that role more and while rocket and groot are definitely closer and rocket is shown to be a disciplinary figure towards him i've always believed their best friend dynamic from vol 1 carried over to the new groot as well. i view rocket more as groot's super cool chill uncle who he can go to sneak a beer and talk shit with at family gatherings.

9. worst part of canon

toss-up between gamora's death and the fact that she was sidelined in vol 3. i'm sorry but i cannot believe james thought not showing a single scene of her with the ravagers before the ending was a good idea. showing not telling is like the number one rule in storytelling, you can just tell me 2014!gamora has a better relationship with the ravagers than she ever did with the guardians and expect me to believe it. also aging down phyla.

10. worst part of fanon

the constant sidelining of gamora (don't even try to deny it it's very obvious, esp after vol 3), the dumbing down of quill (he's not an incompetent leader and he doesn't spout pop culture references 24/7, he's a human being with flaws who at his core is a good person and good leader), the weird ass ships (once again no matter how anthropomorphic he is rocket is still a RACCOON), people who don't read comics but pretend like they know the comic characterizations of characters.

20. part of canon you found tedious or boring

kraglin uhhhh as much as i love vol 2 i never cared much for the ravagers b plot, i can take it or leave it. it does lead to a very emotional ending but i never find myself paying too much attention to the yondu/rocket/groot scenes on my rewatches.

23. ship you've unwillingly come around to

majority of the 616 gamora ships thanks to you. i think she should be allowed to make out with everyone. as a treat.

[scrunkly-cherry]

INTRODUCTION, BECAUSE I NEVER MADE ONE AND MY POSTING SEEMS INCONSISTENT!

(last change: 01/21 2024)

Hi! You can either call me cherry, fynx or squidbot! I mostly do art, edits, shitposts, headcanons or repost-spam :p

I'm mostly a traditional artist, but I feel like I'm getting better and better at doing digital stuff too (I'd say my digital stuff is even better, considering coloring and lightning). Either way I still suck at backgrounds.

The stuff I post includes:

My OCs. I might not be the best at explaining stuff and doing bios about them but - I like to talk about them :3 (includes a lot of Fandom-OC Stuff too btw!)

My fandoms - Atm the only one I'm daily active in is Splatoon, but I also like Sonic (no preference in games or universes, but I really like Boom) and the Borderlands-Series (especially Tales From)

Video Games I've recently started

Random thoughts

Headcanons for both OCs and Fandoms

Other Facts about me:

My favorite part of Splatoon are the Idols and Story Mode - My favorite Idol Group are the Squid Sisters and my favorite Idols in general are Callie, Frye and Marina <3

OBSESSED with futuristic aesthetics. Most of my OC-Verses take place in the future and feature robots and androids (WHICH I AM ALSO OBSESSED WITH.)

I love cats

BYF-Criteria:

I'm kind of-... stupid when it comes to how Tumblr works. Idk how to properly reply to reblogs and stuff. So if I do anything wrong, that's why :"D

I post a lot, and I mean A LOT of filler stuff. I sadly always forget the queue tag, but others I Tag accordingly, so if you wanna see specific stuff, look in the tags I use!

I do oc x canon, rarepairs, if I wasn't a coward even crosship - as long as it's not illegal, I see no problem with it, but it's completely okay of you're not on board with it! I'll tag posts like these accordingly.

DNI (although there's not much):

Basic DNI-criteria, duh

People that still partake in cringe culture

"Art Lore"-People

I don't have much else. Don't be a dick ig?

That's mostly all, thanks for reading <3

Have this sloppy edit of my last 5 Splatfests so far:

[asktheheirofslytherin]

That blazed post is giving me serious anxiety and I even cried. Am I really so horrible for liking HP? It helped me in the worst of times and I can't let it go. It'd be like letting go of my childhood friend. Idk why she who must not be named had to ruin it for us. Why couldn't she just stay quiet? I hope this shit is just on Tumblr and not irl .

OOC:

Short answer - You're not horrible. At all.

Long answer - It's nuanced. I know plenty of queer/marginalized/ liberal minded people who are still engaged in the fandom on their own terms. We are out there. We are inclusive and supportive.

Keep in mind a lot of these antis are extremely hurt. Many used to be hp fans and feel betrayed by the creator. They deal with that in different ways. I stopped buying anything that would support her financially, for example. Other people actively try to discourage anyone from engaging. And while I cannot dismiss anyone's individual choices or pain, I can be critical of people who try to control what other people like and how they process things.

Sometimes people compare the creator to Lovecraft, and while there are similarities, this isn't entirely the same issue. Lovecraft has been dead for a long time and you can become aquainted with Lovecraftian horror with the disclaimer at the beginning of the journey. There have been decades of processing and evolution. Many (most) hp fans were lured in and then a bomb was dropped. The creator is still on Twitter. It's harder to ignore. Former fans lash out.

I like Lord Voldemort. The character and fic were a key part of getting through some serious mental health shit in my teens. Also hp was my first real exposure to large scale world building, which impacted me greatly as a writer. So while I've lost connection with much of hp, I'm not letting go of this Volde-centric corner of fandom. And I don't feel bad about it in the slightest.

I think many (mostly younger) people today are (rightfully) horrified by the world and some of the people in it, and are therefore holding each other up to higher (and in many times impossible) standards. Some of these revelations are good. Others - such as fandom purity culture and "your fav is problematic" - is excessive. It's a trauma response, yes, but truly - I am much more worried about people's stances on say - the state of bodily autonomy in the US or the human rights violations in Iran than I am what their favorite fictional character is.

No one should be put on a pedestal. No one. Not your favorite author or celebrity, not your parents or other irl role models, not your partner, not even Mr Rogers. They will let you down. I've let people down in the past. I'll do it again - not intentionally, but that's not the point.

You can't live your life trying to justify your choices to as many people as possible. You can just live your life being the best person you can be according to your ideals. Be kind, open minded and accepting. Set boundaries with people you can't agree with and whose behavior is truly unacceptable. Allow yourself to change over time. Allow others to do the same. And for farts sakes, like whatever piece of fandom you want. Liking a book is not a moral judgement. Being a dick to others about what they like is.

[kiwikiwiandkiwi]

"#and honestly i don't think this stunt will ever end" my exact sentiment. I realized this when the kid turned two and I stopped caring. I accepted we are going to deal with "dad" Louis forever and moved on. I've decided I will be here for his and Harry's music and career and I will just ignore everything about their personal life. I don't care. And now 5 years later I'm glad I did. It's much better than holding onto hope only to have it crushed every single time. I would probably even go and see the doc if it was showing in my country but it's not lol

I just know this stunt is never going to end but I haven’t really processed this information because every time that this subject is brought up I still get sad/mad/tired.

It’s just that there were so many ways they could’ve ended this over the last seven years and yet… We still have the DNA test to maybe one day prove he was never his kid, but if Louis were ever to take it, this kid would still be a thing imo, because you don’t just raise someone as your son for seven years and then one night you find out you’re not actually related to the kid and you’re like “well, it was a good ride but now we part ways” I mean what kind of person would you be if the only reason that made you raise this child was because you thought you two were related?? and also if that’s all it took for you not having to deal with the kid anymore, then why did it take you SEVEN years to take a DNA test??? Idk, there’s so much we don’t know and will never know, but this is a messed up situation and I don’t see it ever ending. There’s no way out except the truth and I doubt we will ever get that.

And yet, I’m still here. I’m too stubborn to leave, and whether I like it or not, I have spent the last years of my life following every second of Louis (and Harry’s) every day life (literally), and not just because I want to or because it’s fun (spoiler alert: it’s not always fun) but because I care so much about them, like SO MUCH (I don’t need to explain to you this, it’s tumblr, we all get it). So I’ll always take the good with the bad (for now).

What really frustrates me though is that every time a stunt happens, we (larries) get to be the punch bag and everyone and their mother start calling us crazy or psychos, and that really pisses me off, because I don’t even think the problem is that this is just an absurd theory/idea (believe me, I know it is!!!!!) the problem is that if you think Louis and Harry are together, and god forbid, think that Louis is not a dad, people will call us “delusional teenagers” or if you are older, you’re just a jobless woman who is probably lonely, cause this has always been the culture when it comes to boybands (and fandom culture in general) and was the culture 1dhq, and eventually lthq and hshq, always encouraged. so we are not taken seriously, we are called hysterical and we are narrowed down to some stereotype that it’s probably not even true (and if it is then SO WHAT??).

I know it’s probably not easy to navigate an artist’s image when not only he’s gay, but he also has years and years of “proofs” that he’s dated several women, had a kid, made some homophobic comments, etc and is also currently dating one of the most famous person in the world right now (who is also in the closet and also has years of doing the same thing). And I’m sure as hell it doesn’t help when we keep pushing the buttons and saying no he’s not a dad, yes he’s gay, when you have his team always doing the opposite: “he has a new girlfriend” “the kid is in his doc”. But it’s awful because that’s they way it’s been since the beginning, all due to the fact that Louis and Harry are gay. It all comes down to this one fact. There’s just no way out.

(And just to make myself clear, I don’t think this is Louis’ fault, I don’t think he wants this, I honestly believe he only has so many choices he can make and he does the best he can with it, but I wonder what’s the point, is this all worth it? lmao I do truly hope he has made peace with himself and with this situation (and Harry too tbh) because if it’s hard on us, I can only imagine how hard it is for them and their families. As I always say, I can always leave this fandom and leave this bullshit behind me but they can’t. So yeah…)

[spaceytoxinz]

Intro post cause I forgot to make one lmfao

DNI:

proshippers

zoos/"MAPs"

terfs

neo-nazis/white supremacists (idk why the last 2 would even be on Tumblr lmao)

Fujoshis. Listen man idc what you read just don't come up to me and say you ship two random men you saw on the street, jfc.

People who genuinely think femboy milk memes are funny jfc you all make me uncomfortable (doesn't count if you're actually a feminine guy)

Same with people who sexualize age/pet regression, get out of here actually.

ALL OF MY ACCOUNTS ARE 15+, SORRY MIDDLE SCHOOLERS

Vinny / 18 / cringe enthusiast, you cannot possibly be more cringe than me I think / 🇧🇿🇬🇹🇺🇲 / autism + ADHD combo ough / TUMBLR SEXYMAN ENTHUSIAST GRAHHH / feminine transguy / emo since 2010 this is a curse

I make art n shit lmao, I only really post my drawings though. I don't post consistently either, I'm usually more active on Instagram

I'm more known for fanart, I'm a multi fandom artist who has too many followers from different places and accidentally make people upset cause I draw one thing and then move on to a different fandom LMFOAO. But usually I never join new fandoms, I stick around the old ones and let them circulate. I'm a fandom veteran despite being in elementary for most of them

I ALSO WORK ON MY OWN COMIC IDEAS TEE HEE. PLEASE ASK ME ABOUT MY OCS MAKING HEADCANONS FOR ALREADY EXISTING CHARACTERS IS KINDA HARD FOR ME GRAHHHH 💣💣🔥💣💣🧨💥💥🦅🦅🚨🚨🗣️🗣️🗣️🦅🗣️🦅🦅🔥💣💣

Fandoms in question:

FNAF (usually just rebornicas old night guard designs LMAO I hate them as a person now)

DHMIS

Tankmen/ somewhat fnf??? Mostly tankmen and occasionally the Garcello mod

I have a fursona

Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

The Aikuro Mikisugi fandom (there's only like 2 people lmfao. I like kill la kill but both the show and it's fandom has its issues man.)

JTHM/ invader zim. It's been a long ass time since I returned to these but they're still there

Theres other fandoms I used to be part of but either I just refuse to acknowledge them or just haven't returned to them in years. I still know shit about it though. I was extremely unsupervised on the internet since age 4.

THIS IS A SAFE SPACE FOR: LGBTQ+, self shippers/self insert people, uhh and people who are part of fandoms that fall under cringe culture I guess, oh and people who use neopronouns and MOGAI labels I think that's the term.

[sofipitch]

If you're comfortable can you talk about more about your experience in the fandom because I share similar sentiments, in a separate fandom. I received death threats every day and my friend's account was hacked into and certain posts of hers were deleted. It lasted years. It was horrible. Did you write your fic Long Way Home (I love the title!) before amc iwtv was announced? Are those fans of the books who drove other fans out still around and may I know who they are so that I may block them? (1/2)

If I may, I want to share that when the HP books were first released--before JKR exposed herself and before the movies aired and ruined my inner version of the books-- I read them and certain characters in my mind were never as they were in the books, Hermione was Indian in my mind, as was Lupin, based on real life friends. Ron was definitely not a redhead. I don't know why there is so much hate towards race change, but it seems that a majority of those haters are on FB, as immortalconclusions mentioned about the FB group, I am a part of it and there is much vitriol in that group, especially aimed towards the actors. I am horrified that so many fans of the little mermaid are offended by the beautiful Halle Bailey, she's the perfect Ariel as I see it. Also I hate that some fans want to see Timothee Chalamette as Armand, what a ridiculous choice. (2/2)

So I don't really want to go into it, last time someone sent me an anon shitting on one of these ppl and I answered it the person was harassing all my friends for HOURS in like .3 seconds. Like we are block mutuals and yet she knew immediately, creepy much? There have been doxxing threats on here which is fun, I have gotten threats of violence and idk how related but a friend got one of sexual assault. So I'm not waking the beast by invoking these ppl. If anyone wants specific ppl I would recommend blocking you can dm me. It's honestly not hard to tell, if you see a VC fan who refuses to acknowledge the TV show or overwhelming speaks negatively, that's them. For some reason a lot of ppl try to keep up public appearances on Tumblr yet will say the most vile shit with their IRL name attached in the FB group

I actually came up with the idea for that fic after JA's casting announcement based on ppl saying there was no way for Louis to be black without changing "everything about Louis" or that Louis and Lestat as an interracial couple would be abusive. When you are so woke you think respecting cultural differences means ppl of other races aren't ppl who go through ppl experiences and so woke that the races shouldn't mix (but for POC protection). I just wanted a way to say yes POC are (get this) ppl. And it also turned into a way for my cowriter and I to talk about our own experiences and hopefully make something for other fans of color to hopefully relate too

I'm so sorry about what you are your friend went through, fandom in general has a lot of racism and I think some of it is the anonymity, white ppl feel safer being openly racist. Like all the slurs and stuff I and others have gotten is always done via anon or sock puppet accounts. So they KNOW what they are doing is wrong bc they don't want to attach their name to it. It's both disgusting and pathetic

And yeah this is not a unique situation for VC, when ppl were objecting to JA's casting they tried to come up with a PLETHORA or reasons VC is different and you just can't with Louis and yeah it's always bullshit. Same thing with Ariel, I love The Little Mermaid and I hate the Disney remakes but I will likely see this one in theaters bc that's my girl, I get the appeal of the remakes when it is specifically one of my fave movies 😂 But someone IRL asked me my opinion bc she knows I love Ariel and I was like "she seems good" and she went on to say that "She was always made to feel bad she was a redhead growing up (this girl is like strawberry blonde so barely, 0 freckles) and Ariel made her feel better". Like they were taking away HER representation. I don't even need to go into how fucking stupid that is. They ALWAYS claim to have specific and valid rationales for this one casting, they aren't a racist (maybe they even have POC friends!) 🙄

[chogiwow]

dude so i saw ur reply last night but i was in desperate need of sleep but also didn't sleep bc i was just engrossed in a book IVDSNS BUT this morning i opened up my inbox and couldnt find ur reply and was so confused and as i continued to be unable to find it in my inbox i got sadder and then i realised im stupid bc the reply wouldn't be in my inbox 🧍‍♂️anyways semi-long reply sorry hehe (semi-long bc ive defs sent longer ones)

ahh i see i see @ substack. reminds me of medium, which i've come across before... i did debate exploring medium as another writing platform, but never got around to it vsjnvks so its nice that u bring substack to my attention bc now i can compare 🤩 well. maybe not now now but yknow. whenever i decide to/can get around to it NVJDKNSK

100% agree w and have had the same thoughts as you about fics/continuing to write/the pub industry (which i really should give much more thought to, given that one of my degrees is in writing🧍‍♂️) and yeah no it DOES serve as a good incentive to build a portfolio (if anyone asked me for a portfolio, i would simply hand over my uni work bc i have nothing else rn LMAO) but tbh i think even if it is a hobby, it's a good way to kinda explore and set your ??? idk like foundations or whatever so you get an idea of what you wanna write about and if you actually wanna take it seriously (which isn't to say you aren't - we can 100% take hobbies seriously - just that different contexts/intents would call for different. things. wow i love words.)

and also related but unrelated, i think its fun/nice to. uh. idk how to say it but for us (as in literally you and me, but also other mutuals and people in fandom who made friends in the context of fandom) to see eachother write or talk about things outside of the uniting factor or common denominator or whatever? though yeah that does kinda potentially extend the relationship beyond what some people are comfy w. i'm kinda just rambling rn sorry AHHA

OH BUT BUT sorry back to the publishing/career thing. Even if you don't use the substack writings for like. writing/publishing careers, it can still help with other career things? like, you run a blog and hav experience writing about diverse topics, communicating ideas etcetc. so no losses 🤩

do not feel guilty about the chan fic 🙂‍↔️ yes i love/d it and i think about it and yes i would love to read more BUT im so happy to have just been eble to experience it at all. i hope you've never felt pressured by my responses to it KNVDSKJNVDSK sincerest of apologies if you have.

tbh i havent been up to much, i don't think. shits kinda hit the fan tbh but i'm hoping (always hoping) the only other place for the shit to go is down, now. (ie. i hope this is the part where things start getting easier etc). it is what it is, even if it shouldn't be, and we'll somehow get through it because. well, we have so far, right? BUT ANYWAYS

"anything you wanna yap about-" BOY do i have things to yap about. that book^^ i was so engrossed in? jesus CHRIST i sent my friend 10mins worth of voicemsgs JNCDKSNDSK (it may have been 10mins because i simply i can't articulate properly and kept repeating myself and going off on tangents.. but it probably would have been 10mins anyways if i'd planned and scripted it all before hand anyways. it was only 10mins because i got tired and realised i should probably see how much ive spammed 💀) ("kat... 10 whole minutes? 😭" babes thats not even the worst of it-)

i also like to 'yap' about the stuff i learn in class (my other degree/major is in media and cultural studies) and i just 🤩 have so much to say about some things that i find so so interesting but me talking as much as i do/want to is also just. i find it interesting and really wanna share and talk about it KJNVDSKJVNSK so like yeah, to bring this full circle, is why i've vaguely thought about using medium/substack,,, tbh i thought about just making a sideblog here AHAHA but i cant take myself on tumblr seriously LOL + 'fresh' start on new platform sounds neat mhm mhm but also hehehe (evil) maybe instead of spamming my friend about stuff, i can just write blog posts and she can read it whenever hMMMM thinking thinking,,,

anyways 🧍‍♂️sorry, i was expectin this to be long but it ended up longer than i thought it would HAHA wait no im rereading my ask/reply rn and substack just sounds great bc i can do informal reviews about things i've watched/read aswell AHHHH and yeah like just ??? more personal though explorations/'journaling' kinda vibes as well? HMMM AND and even mini writing pieces--- i literally do not have the time to be considering this rn but here i am wHOOPS okay i'll stop now before this gets even longer 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️

hi katttt, i'm so sorry for the late reply :'D apparently i'm in the phase of my life where i can only type out articulated replies on my laptop and not my phone, also week's been sooo hectic i hate being a corporate slave fml <3

lmfao not you tryna find my reply in your inbox sdjskd all's good tho hehe :3ooh medium is ... something, i couldn't really figure it out all that well and also the few times i've tried to read on medium, it's asked me to subsribe or sign up to continue to read? and i just don't ... vibe with that lol

yes yes, tryna write about real life stuff really makes me pause once in a while and just think (?) it through bc writing fiction is gen easier than trying to string together the raw ideas relating irl issues/stuff (for me at least). like it really makes me stop midway and rethink my choice of phrasing stuff or even putting forward an opinion thinking about how its gonna make people percieve me? well, not that its not sumn that doesn't apply to fiction as well bc i kinda think that the way one writes always just brings about some sort of perception of their character and personal views through their words, no matter how subtle ... am i making sense? but fictional writing just lets you cloak it into a 'what-if' situation where any judgement of your story/character(s) is not a direct discernment of your personal opinions whereas talking about irl stuff always comes with that concious load of having your opinions/thoughts being obligated to a verdict (positive/negative/both).

so anywayyy sjhdj, yes it's fun to just write and pursue as a hobby bc its fun communiatingideas and realise that it might not be all that irrelevant as you thought haha :>

and noooo, i absolutely love love LOVE reading yout tags on my fics, like i legit go back to my old writings and read the rb tags and it always makes me so happy :( i do want to continue writing fiction bc its always been a comfort to me to be able to weave stories my way, but i suppose everything has its own time to unfold and settle ... sometimes inspiration hits so bad but the will to write it out is just not there :/ but anyway ! i'm glad that you've enjoyed my writing so far <3

yeah, things don't don't need to work out all the time. i'm realising this the hard way, through adulting. really makes me wanna go back and give my younger self a good whooping on the ass to have ever wanted to grow up fast so desperately. but yeah, hope your shit works out man (✿◡‿◡)

lmaoooo no bc ! its so fun to just simply yap about stuff , that's like writing but ... verbally ,,, you could litch rally make a yap blog and i'd read it alllllll :3 also what book is this, drop the nameeeee :'D no but like i get you not being able to take tumblr seriously bc i was like ! i can't talk about this shit on tumblr ! tumblr's supposed to be for my clownery ! all the grownup stuff needs a different platform altogether sjsdksjd but if you ever consider making a blog, i think i'll read it fo the vibes itself. and the words ofc and opinions and stuff. like that's important too gaaaahhhhh what i'm saying is ,, i think you'd make a really amusing and entertaining blog - in a good way !!

anyway ! i think i needed a medium to unscramble the crap in my brain so the blog served well (even though it was an impulsive decision lol) but yeah ! go for it, you won't regret it. nobody really gaf's in the beginning, like readership is low babes, unless you have friends who will actively read your shit but that's a big comfort to me lololol. not sicouraging you in anyway, but its a point to consider if you're looking for a chill sesh with your own writing haha <3

[harrowitzer]

1 3 22 24 25 🔥🔥

1. the character everyone gets wrong

Already covered this, Venom is the only one I can think of.

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

Oh boy! This isn't fandom related, sorry. I found a hornyposting blog with a DNI for under 18 and OVER 35 one time. It pissed me tf off because, like, you don't even want me to rb your posts? Am I a predator for being an old? I understand that you don't want to get in a relationship with someone who's a lot older, but you'd think a person would have some grey area between that and DNI, on a public space like a blog.

Anyway I blocked them 😆

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

In Loki, I think Sylvie's relationships with the other characters are really interesting. Loki, sure, but Mobius too. I'm stoked to see that there's a TVA comic coming out that includes Sylvie and B-15. (with Spider-Gwen, too???)

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

I'm a ship and let ship person, so any time I see "proship DNI" I follow their instructions and block them. Just the fact that people are still using that language in 2024 is crazy to me.

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

IDK maybe it's not actually a problem but hearing "why do you have to make it gay?" and "there's too many gay ships" is just. Grow up.

Natalie Wynn has done some interesting thinking about people's reasons behind romance and shipping culture, and I really love that she takes it seriously as a cultural phenomenon and doesn't just brush it off. She has thoughts about gay vs. straight ships that I've been grappling with. Anyone interested should go watch her Twilight video!

[gigglesnortbangdead]

for ask meme: 4-6, 11-13, 17-19, 24!

4. what’s an inside joke you have with your family or friends?

a little joke me and one of my besties do is every time there is text on an establishing shot that tells us where the scene is taking place, we say "ohhhh, That's where that is!" and i don't know why we have continued doing this for the better part of a decade, but we do it basically every time this happens. this is not something that is funny, but it is funny that we have continued to do this.

5. what made you start your blog?

it was so long ago.... my bestie had a tumblr and a few fanfic writers that i really liked had tumblrs, and i don't know, i just figured what the hell. and now here we are!

6. what’s the best and worst part of being online/a creator?

specifically about being an online creator, probably the best is that it's a low stakes way to be creative and have people read my work! getting published (or even self-publishing) is such a hassle. i want to write and edit my work, and then just drop it for people to read right away! And because there's that immediacy of publishing, I don't have to feel an intense level of anxiety over a work being "perfect." i'm tempted to say that the worst part is knowing that other people are better liked and more popular than me, but that would still be an issue for me even if I was in traditional publishing. but the online aspect of this (seeing other people get lots of engagement on their accounts, seeing fics with hundreds of comments and bookmarks, seeing particular fics getting discussed as having fandom-wide importance) are really obvious, and it does feel embarrassing to be so jealous of works/creators that are, in the larger scheme of culture, about as unknown as my own work

11. what do you consider to be romance?

At this point in my life, I really do want to be obsessed with someone who is obsessed with me. I am pretty okay spending time on my own, I entertain myself really well, but it means a lot to me when somebody wants to, like, hear about the stuff I did while I was alone. Like "yes, tell me about the movie you watched," or "what color did you paint your nails?" or whatever. I'm not a very interesting person, so I'd like to feel interesting to someone! I also like it when someone wants to touch me! It's good we live in a world where people ask before they touch each other, I guess, but I'm bad at inviting physical contact, so when someone just goes for it (and I like it), that feels really special! Also also I think it's romantic when someone I like makes choices for me, sorry!

12. what’s some good advice you want to share?

idk stream Fear of Death? i don't think i'm the person to go to for advice

13. what are you doing right now?

listening to this week's Throwback Thursday playlist on spotify and answering my online correspondence ❤️

17. name 3 things that make you happy

listening to music while i play on my computer, grilled cheese and tomato soup, and my fwends

18. do you believe in ghosts and/or aliens?

like, sure. i mean, i don't know, it's not something that keeps me up. i think i personally veer sort of skeptical about ghosts/aliens in my own life, but i have zero interest in ever telling somebody that their encounters aren't real just because i've never experienced something like that. like i'm fully aware that i'm a spiritual nutjob (semi-ironically, but not ironically enough), so i'm very 👍 to whatever people vibe with

19. favourite thing about the day?

getting to watch people go around with their dogs and kids! also brunch!! and when you do things during the day, it means you can relax at night time! and when the weather is nice, i do like actually being outside during the day and getting some sun (the heat has just been so bad lately, I can't remember what that was like haha)

24. what’s one thing you’re proud of yourself for?

A coworker of mine is writing a script, and he said my notes on the script were both really helpful and also made him laugh a lot, and that made me feel really good!