#if any of you wonder where ive been for the past 2 years ive been hyperfixating on the sims and starting mod wips | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

canonicallyobserving911 · 2 months

Text

WIP Wednesday

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

FANON FanFic: Buddie Multi-Chapter - Hiatus Reading: “I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Chapter 31 will be posted soon!

This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

Currently 30 chapters completed: 1.331M Words; Rated: Mature

{Previous snippet #1}; {Previous snippet #2}

__________

I'm excited to finish writing Chapter 31 because at the end of Chapter 30, after having a conversation with Captain Mehta and being asked to join another fire station, Buck decided he didn't want to accept the captain's job to run A-shift at the new #115 firehouse. Also, he was preparing to contact Bobby so they can talk about his future as a captain or lack thereof at the 118 even though Frank hasn't released him from trauma therapy yet. Eddie's back at work and he's more than 30% done with his Advanced Care Paramedic Certification while Chris' working on his 3rd video game presentation with his classmates that's due on Monday, March 4th.

The chapter ended with Buck and Chris being approached by a person from Buck's past and after he sent Chris to get help so he'd be safe, a second person who'd threatened him in the past appeared and they injected him with a drug but will help arrive before Buck's unable to be revived?

__________

Here’s another snippet. It's a little more from Chapter 31 and it starts at the end of snippet #2 (listed above). It's more of the conversation Eddie's having with the 118, Maddie, Athena and Detective Romero.

__________

“It looks like she just injected him with something because as soon as she moves her hand, you can see Buck say, “Ow” then he leans over a little and puts his hand on his shoulder.” Eddie loudly exclaims.

“But what did she inject him with?” Chimney asks.

Ravi replies, “I don’t know but from the looks of it, whatever it was… Buck collapsed not long afterwards. It’s easy to see he was fighting to stay awake and alert.”

Hen looks at Chimney and their eyebrows go up at the same time and they have a quick silent conversation. After a few seconds, Chimney asks, “Could she have dosed him with Adenosine?”

“Why do you think it was Adenosine?” Eddie asks.

“Because the night Jonah took us, he injected it twice into Chimney’s IV. He used it to stop his heart.” Hen replies a little louder than she intends to because memories of that night still haunt both of them.

They've discussed it numerous times but it's usually when they're riding in the ambulance together. Even though it’s been almost two years since it happened and they returned to work not long after they were both discharged from the hospital, when a person does something like that to someone, she knows it sticks with them. She still has the occasional nightmare about it and she knows she needs to schedule an appointment with Frank so she can discuss it but she’s been too busy to deal with it.

“Since Adenosine was designed to slow a tachycardic heart rate down and it can stop the heart of someone whose heart is beating normally, like it did with Chim, it can’t be just that because all of Buck’s organs are failing.” Eddie admits, then he sighs and stops talking for a moment. When he looks at them again, he asks, “Hen and Chim… I know it might be difficult to discuss but do you remember if he used any other drugs on you while he held you captive?”

“Yes, he stuck a syringe in my neck filled with Propofol and he gave Chimney some Epinephrine in addition to the Adenosine.”

“And we know those drugs don’t cause your organs to shut down either.” Maddie replies.

Eddie, Maddie, Chimney and Hen look back and forth at each other as they consider the medicines and drugs they’re aware of. Since the four of them have a combined total of more than 40 years of medical experience between them, they have looks on their faces that illustrate how they believe they should be able to figure this out.

After a few moments of deafening silence, Bobby interjects, "I wonder if she knows Buck's allergic to Naproxen."

“That’s a good thought but I don't see how she would know that unless she was able to get a hold of his medical records. But since me and Chim were able to get access to Jonah's records, maybe she did but injecting him with Naproxen won't shut down all of his organs… he would probably just have an allergic reaction to it." Hen says.

Chimney asks, “What drug could cause all of someone’s organs to shut down?”

“With all the new drug studies and protocols that have been put in place, I can’t think of one.” Maddie replies.

Once Eddie hears this, he rubs his hand over his face and like a movie, he starts seeing the men who were Buck’s height and weight they’ve treated over the last few days. He looks up at Athena and Detective Romero and says, “Whatever drug she injected into Buck, I think they tested it out on other unsuspecting victims first.”

Detective Romero asks, “Why do you think that?”

Why does Eddie think Buck's not the first man with similar weight and height as Buck that's been attacked by Lucy and Jonah? 👀 (foreshadowing was included in Chapter 30.)

Is he right? 🙃

Are his Advanced Care Paramedic studies helping him figure out what happened to his husband? 🤷🏽‍♀️

__________

Fic Summary: Months after Buck and Eddie were hit by the same lightning strike; they’re still struggling with the aftermath of it. But before they make their love confessions, they’ll spend time getting to know themselves as individuals first. Eddie learns to enjoy the simple things in life as he participates in activities on his own and with new friends while Buck learns the rest of the 31-year-old deep dark family secret about his conception and birth. Their journey to forever is still a work in progress but once they finally admit they’re in love with each other, everything that follows their love confessions will be cataclysmic.

__________

Chapter Summaries

Chapter 1 - Eddie makes a new friend while Buck receives devastating news regarding the sperm donation he made for Connor and Kameron.

Chapter 2 - Buck does a lot of research to learn more about the abnormalities found in his red blood cells and Eddie starts a new therapy journey that’s all about him and not the traumas he’s experienced.

Chapter 3 - After more than a month, Buck and Eddie finally spend time together outside of work but it doesn’t end well and they part with a lot of uncertainty regarding their places in each other’s lives.

Chapter 4 - Eddie has a few realizations about his life which causes him to consider moving back to El Paso, TX while Buck continues to be reminded of his past which causes him to take an impromptu road trip across America.

Chapter 5 - Both Buck and Eddie have difficult conversations with their parents and Buck finally learns the truth behind the reason why his mother despised him while Eddie finally tells his mother about the way she tries to control him.

Chapter 6 - More than two weeks after Buck pushed Eddie away after suggesting they needed a break; Eddie decides to try again. Eddie’s there for Buck when he’s at his worst just like Buck was there for him when he was at his worst and he won’t let Buck give up.

Chapter 7 - After Buck’s mental breakdown, Eddie has his back the same way Buck had his when he had his own breakdown more than a year ago. They share several vulnerable and emotionally intimate moments with one another and they begin to realize their small, sweet and caring gestures matter just as much if not more than any grand gesture ever could because these are the foundations of a long-lasting love relationship.

Chapter 8 - Buck, Eddie and Chris all have their own therapists and during their sessions, they reflect on their pasts while they’re in the present so they can prepare for their future together as a family.

Chapter 9 - Buck and Eddie are there for each other when Buck has to testify as a witness during the trial. But by the end of it, they’ll both realize their individual and shared traumas are going to keep resurfacing until they talk about them, deal with the fact that they’re in love with one another and face the fact that they can’t live without each other.

Chapter 10 - As Buck and Eddie finally begin to confront their past traumas, they realize how much they need each other to fill in the gaps of their memories. Additionally, the universe screams at them for what appears to be the one hundredth time so Buck can realize he doesn’t have to ‘find it’ because he already ‘made it’ and Eddie’s reminded tomorrow isn’t promised and he doesn’t have to die alone if he doesn’t want to.

Chapter 11 - A “virga” or dry thunderstorm is in the forecast but once the rain starts, the thunderstorm happening outside won’t be able to match the storm brewing inside between Buck and Eddie. It’s the universe’s final scream and when the tumultuous winds begin to blow, they’ll have one last chance to hold onto everything they’ve built over the last six years or they’ll lose it all forever.

Chapter 12 - Buck and Eddie have always shared a deep physical attraction and an emotional intimacy that’s unmatched but now that they’re in a relationship, they’re learning how to navigate the romantic intimacy they’ve been waiting for six years to explore. The love they have for each other is a once in a lifetime, soulmate, love of their lives type of love that transcends space and time.

Chapter 13 - While navigating the newness of their romantic relationship, Buck and Eddie take advantage of every moment they spend together. As their individual lives, people from their pasts, time constraints and the possibility of losing each other again make attempts to interrupt and interfere with their journey to forever, they love, care for, support and hold onto each other even tighter to withstand it all.

Chapter 14 - Buck and Eddie can see the lights at the end of the tunnels regarding the results of Buck’s Cancer Screening along with everything else they’re dealing with. But are the lights they see exits to the tunnels or are they headlights on different runaway trains that are speeding towards them in an effort to interrupt their forever?

Chapter 15 - Buck and Eddie have known they were exactly who the other one wanted in a partner since they met six years ago when they agreed to have each other’s backs. They’re in a romantic relationship, they’re both preparing to ask the other one to spend forever with them and by the end of the seventh week into their relationship, together they will plan their most important and greatest adventure for their future.

Chapter 16 - As Buck and Eddie begin to prepare for their marriage ceremony that will take place in Rome, Italy in December 2023, they start planning their first international adventure as a romantic couple. Even though Chris is still the only person they’ve told about their relationship, several people who know them have already witnessed the love they share and as the days continue, others will witness it too.

Chapter 17 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to departing Los Angeles for their international adventure, a moment in time will remind them; life is fragile, tomorrow isn’t promised and every second of everyday should be cherished because everything can change in an instant. The result of that realization will cause them to hold onto each other even more.

Chapter 18 - As Buck, Eddie and Chris prepare for family gatherings before and during the Thanksgiving holiday, the “Santa Ana Winds” start to blow and all sorts of expected and unexpected familial drama ensues.

Chapter 19 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to their wedding day, the universe begins to align everything so that some of their parent and children's relationships are strengthened while others come to an abrupt end.

Chapter 20 - With only 14 days remaining until Buck, Eddie and Chris depart Los Angeles, CA traveling to Rome, Italy, for their first family adventure, an early morning conversation about “tying up loose ends” helps Buck and Eddie realize there are still several things left unfinished on their ‘To Do’ lists. The question is will there be enough time to complete all of them?

Chapter 21 - Buck, Eddie and Chris are finalizing their ‘To Do’ Lists, double checking their itineraries and packing their suitcases in preparation for their trip to Europe so they can board their flight that departs Los Angeles, CA on Friday, December 15, 2023 at 3:25PM.

Chapter 22 - While Buck, Eddie and Chris spend the first 8 days of their European family adventure in Italy, their primary reason for going will be fulfilled as well as several others they hadn’t considered or anticipated.

Chapter 23 - As the Diaz Family continues their Italian family adventure, they’ll say, “Ciao” or hello and goodbye to a lot of things almost immediately after they become an official and legal family.

Chapter 24 - After Buck, Eddie and Chris arrive in London, England on December 24th; the Diazes immediately start preparing to spend their first family Christmas together. During their stay, each of them will hear a few choice words that will be the life raft to get them home to complete their searches to be seen and to be found.

Chapter 25 - After spending more than two weeks in Europe, Eddie, Buck and Chris are back in Los Angeles and they’re getting ready to attend Maddie and Chimney’s New Year’s Eve party. During the event, they have plans to make two surprise announcements but the question is, who’s really going to be surprised, the Diaz family or their found family at the 118?

Chapter 26 - Buck and Eddie are once again faced with their greatest fear of losing each other but this time it could be permanent and if it is, then they won’t be able to spend the rest of their lives together.

Chapter 27 - After Buck resumes therapy, he’ll continue to face the fact that he “DIED” in March 2023 and during those sessions, he’ll learn about the 7 stages of grief. As he continues his healing journey, Eddie will be right by his side just like he promised and the Diaz family will start to deal with their three minutes and seventeen seconds loss as a family.

Chapter 28 - Two years ago, Eddie was asked, “What are you afraid of?”; twice, once by Frank and once by Buck but he only answered one of them without deflecting. Since that time, he’s been to therapy and him and Buck got married but the question resurfaces when Frank asks Buck the same question and Buck asks it of Eddie for the second time. However, when Buck asks, his reasoning will be about something else entirely.

Chapter 29 - After Buck and Eddie have an emotionally intimate conversation regarding their dreams, they make several decisions that will affect their future. When everything falls into place, they’ll realize one of those decisions will result in them no longer being work partners.

Chapter 30 - In 2018, Buck and Eddie met at the 118 and after some initial apprehensions on Buck’s part, they became work partners and they agreed to have each other’s backs. It’s been more than 6 ½ years, a lot’s happened, they got married in December 2023 and they have the family they both chose. With Eddie leaving the 118 in 3 months and Buck getting closer to moving past his grief, what will him losing his work partner mean for him?

Chapter 31 - Will be posted soon.

__________

Read chapters 1-30 are available on AO3.

Continue reading on AO3

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #christopher diaz #the buckley diaz family #buckley diaz family #The Diaz Family #Fanonwriter2023 on AO3 #Hiatus Reading #ao3 fanfic #buddie fanfic #911 fanfic #“I'm still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”#Chapter 31 will be posted soon.#WIP Wednesday #buddie wip

18 notes · View notes

cyberdragoninfinity · 2 months

Note

Hello, I've been enjoying your Arc-V reactions so much. I had a question since you called Yuya your favorite protagonist, do you have some like deeper character analysis thoughts on him? I feel like I had a strong grasp of his character in season 1, but in seasons 2 and 3 I don't think I understood well what the writers were going for with him, other than he's extremely repressed because both parents told him he's never allowed to get angry or cry and express any negative emotions.

WAH THANK YOU apologies this took ten thousand years to get to..late june/july is always busy for my art fightin' ass

ANYWAY IVE BEEN HMMING AND PONDERING OVER THIS FOR A WHILE and like. i think the tricky thing with yuya is that, well, i don't think the WRITERS even fully had a grasp on what they wanted to go for with him in the later seasons (and/or what they wanted to do with arc-v's themes. and the plot. and the all of it lmao) so it really is a bit of a 'there's multiple reads you can have on this character and while not all of 'em are right, not all of 'em are probably wrong either'; the narrative frankly doesn't have a strong enough backbone for like the entire second half to put full conviction into one definite read. Great news for guys who like to think way too much about yugioh characters!! Less great news for "trying to actually grasp wtf the actual honest to god true intent of the writing was" 🥴

All that on the table and now aside, let's talk about the little unwell tomato of the hour. First I do think it's a bit misleading to say Yuya's especially repressed, per say--there's an element of unconscious ignoring/avoidance to repression, and let's be real this kid is certainly not ignoring his negative emotions. The negative emotions are beating his ass. He is spending half the series having catastrophic emotional meltdowns and veering directly into sobs and explosive rage outbursts and feeling Bad almost constantly. I think with him it's more an instance of him having just an absolute pisspoor handling on his emotional regulation... because yeah his parents have been giving him terrible self-help advice for years </3

I don't think theyve necessarily told him he's not allowed to be sad/get angry/express negative emotions--instead it's more of a case where (with Yusho especially) Yuya's being told if he DOES feel sad or upset, then that needs to be met with a smile in order to truly push past it and to feel better, i.e. if you fake the laughter then it will become genuine laughter and youll be a-ok and HAPPY!! YAY HAPPY ^_^ (yusho you cant fucking say that to your coughing baby who's also a hydrogen bomb!!!! oh god!!!!)

arc-v is Very into this idea of illustration emotions as through the metaphor of a pendulum (huh wonder why) especially like.... 'when you're crying, laugh instead, and that will swing your emotions back around again into positive ones' and 'if you're courageous and confident and push through feeling upset, that courage will swing back and turn into happiness.' which is like... IT'S ALMOST SOMETHING. THEYRE ALMOST SAYING SOMETHING MEANINGFUL. BUT YUYA IS SUCH A BAD MAIN CHARACTER TO EMBODY THIS THEMATIC CONCEPT. he's neurotic and kind of not particularly brave and wretchedly insecure and again his emotional regulation is complete dogwater and he's not a very good, confident duelist (or showman even) and so on and so forth. And the problem I think is as you get into season 2 and 3 the stakes keep getting higher and urgent but Yuya doesn't really like.... Grow very much in those aforementioned areas. They just start piling more and more insane shit on him and then it's not just his dad telling him to smile more but also like half the rest of the cast and the narrative itself BUT THERE NEVER GETS TO BE A MOMENT WHERE LIKE. THAT MANTRA FEELS EARNED, FOR YUYA. The writers reeeeally really want him to be this embodiment of laughter and always swinging back around to smile in the face of adversity but most of the moments we see them trying to make Yuya out to be this in the show, where his dueling brings smiles to everyone and ends classism and makes the bad guys nice immediately, they just feel kind of....fake. ive mentioned before how the end of arc-v feels like a fake tumblr post but alongside that a lot of season 2/3's writing for yuya feels like the exaggerated parody of steven universe that su critical blogs in 2015 were convincing themselves existed. and don't get me wrong it's fucking hysterical, I think it's hilarious yuya fixed arc-v aster in like two duels and now he's not an authoritarian child soldier anymore, but we do have to also Be So Serious.

sorry i just needed to post CHILL OUT ON THE GLOOM AND DOOM :/ again. this aster definitely has killed people but it's fine yuya fixed him. he's fine.

IMO It's hard to get a grasp on/understand Yuya's character in the later half of the series cuz yuya's character is so weighed down with these big idealistic themes the show didn't actually put any work towards getting him on a narratively satisfying track to fulfill them. He spends like 2/3s of season two literally locked in rooms astral projecting every so often like COME ON. and season 3 much like a lot of arc-v ALMOST GETS THERE. ALMOST SAYS SOMETHING, WITH YURI AND WITH ZARC. What happens when someone's happiness comes about from pain and violence? What happens when a smile is full of malice? That could be such a cool opportunity to explore the pitfalls of the pendulum emotion metaphor the show sets up, how that can be twisted into something harmful, but. well. that's not what we got huh :,)

anyway all that to say i think yuya's a sweet kid who has such a genuinely big heart and is a really interesting character, but it's almost this sort of key feature of his that he's really not a terribly happy person despite the smiley emoji-shaped hole the show's plot tries to jam him into (and cuz of that there's just so much dissonance in that that makes his whole deal kind of murky when all is said and done.) he's really a character that just has nonstop shit Happening to him whether he wants it to or not and it's kind of insane how little agency he has for like... So Much of the Show. He's made into a mouthpiece for Smile Away Da Pain and like.... for what? [arc-v spoilers if it matters] at the end of the series the other three yuboys are effectively dead and soul-absorbed and don't come back and it's like. you cant Smile World that loss away, arc-v. yknow?

i have no idea what my point was anymore, it is very late haha. LOVE YUYA. THEY COULD HAVE SAID SOME REALLY THOUGHT PROVOKING SHIT WITH HIM. AND YET !

#ygo posting #long post /#dana's ygo bible study #SORRY THIS IS A LOT AND I HAVE NO CLUE HOW MUCH OF THIS MAKES SENSE kind of just rambling. many yuya thoughts #tl;dr i dont blame you for not knowing what was going on with him. they dont make it easy -__-#ASKS #linkspooky #ok goodnight. closes my big storybook

13 notes · View notes

themagnusprotocol-avaragerant · 5 months

Text

Good evening listeners!

Episode 1.

This summary is going to include the theory that Elias, Jon and Martin are all voices in FR3DD1! I’m sure you all can do your research.

I’m going to start off with my general thoughts! This episode was long and I’m sorry for the rant, it’s supposed to be concise but I got distracted! Please let me know what you’d like me to focus on in future, I’d love to hear your ideas!

What are my thoughts?

- At the beginning, we seem to be listening to this episode from the recording of a PC. Maybe the very same PC that holds Jon and his friends? Who knows!

TEDDY: Teddy’s leaving party! That totally isn’t gonna bite him in the arse! I find it quite surprising as I thought institute workers couldn’t leave. Though, this is the OIAR. Not the institute. But I think we’ll be seeing our little friend quite soon!

COLIN: Colin is a little ray of sunshine, isn’t he? Can’t wait to see how he handles our little friends in the computer! He seems to be under the sort of “curse” that prevents him from leaving. Teddy seems to know it. Which begs the question, why can Teddy leave? He has been working on this program for 2 years, and has tried everything under the sun! At the end, he seems rather frenzied. He is frantically searching through drawers and talking to FR3DD1. He seems aware that Freddy can hear him, and determined to find out! I wonder how well that went for our past team, hmm?

GWEN: It seems Gwen’s anger is unfounded. Why? I haven’t a clue. Maybe we’ll find out why she hates Alice in later episodes? She also seems to want to be head of the OIAR badly. Maybe something to do with her being a Bouchard?

- “modified version of Windows NT 4.0” maybe that detail will be useful!

SAM: Sam on his paperwork ticked a box called “response 121”! I’m sure that’ll have 0 consequences later on whatsoever! Don’t you?

Our statement is read out by our good friend Norris! This I believe is Alexander, our voice actor for Martin!

The statement is an email. Here are the details!

To: Darla Winstead ([email protected])  From: Harriet Winstead ([email protected]) Date: May 12, 2022 Subject: Re: Re: checking in

I won’t explain the whole statement, you’ve probably heard the episode! But i will link the transcripts for you who want to do a little digging!

A brief summary of it: a woman who is mourning the loss of a lover suddenly gets a call from a voice sounding suspiciously like the dead man himself! She goes to the cemetery only to be met with “some of him”, as the creature put it. This sends her into a panic!

And it turns out we get another statement too! This one seems to be read out by Chester, who I believe to be Jon, but it doesn’t give us a clear name! Here are the details!

Forums.lostcityurbex.com.

Board index. Spelunking. Sites.

New topic: Magnus Institute Ruins

By RedCanary on Sunday April 10, 2022. 3:31pm.

A brief summary: a spelunker called “RedCanary” goes to explore the Magnus institute ruins after some form of fire happened years ago. He seems spooked out, finding “symbols and stuff and some pretty suspicious stains on some floors.” Aswell as a sense of anxiety he didn’t have before! He ended up getting banned due to Gory images, something about eyes? Maybe it’s our good friend Jonah leaving his mark! Who knows?

Please let me know if iv missed anything at all! Feel free to mention any theories you may have. I want this to be an area where you can get those little cogs turning!

And as always…

Thankyou for listening.

#tmagp #tma podcast #the magnus protocol #tmagp spoilers #tmagp 1 #tmagp theory #tmagp summaries

14 notes · View notes

malewife-overlord · 3 months

Text

Six Cycles Later -- Part I

OKAY SO. after speaking to literally two people about some oc transformer fic ive been working on, ive decided to post just chapter 1 here, to see if anyone else would like to see the ocs ive been quietly going crazy for in the background. instead of writing actual proper fanfic ive decided to just go off the rails writing a canon elaboration on characters who dont exist. i will now make it everyone elses problem.

tbh im intending to keep writing this for as long as it brings me joy, and im already working on chapter 2. whether this gets attention or not won't change that fact. just kinda posting here to garner some attention/see if anyone else would like to get invested in my silly lil ocs.

this takes place in sorta a g1/idw mixed continuity, im not particularly picky or strict about canon, because really, im just here to have fun and vibe. it will focus on my OCs, not canon characters, though a couple will still be present :> this idea has been one that nagged at me for a bit--isnt it a bit weird that the decepticons just straight up seem to abandon their prior base on earth in g1 following the movie? i wondered for a while what it'd be like if any of them were left behind. so, i've decided to make an oc for it and explore that a little. aaaaaand then i kinda went off the rails (but we'll get there, lol). if none of that is particularly off-putting to you, feel free to proceed! and comments are always appreciated if you enjoy

Summary: Invert is a nobody. One of a million Seekers constructed for a war that would claim their lives, she's survived due to her uselessness. Forged with a defective frame and kept around for a single devastating ability that hurts her to use it, she may as well be a glorified cleaning bot. Months after the other Decepticon's left to assault Autobot City, Invert remains behind on Earth, waiting, on the sunken Victory, maintaining the base and holding out hope that her brethren will eventually return.

But with only silence and an emotionless ship for company, she's started to become increasingly desperate--so much so, that, when an SOS from a ship that should be empty arrives, she just might throw caution to the wind and leave on a mission that could change her life.

Luster was somebody, once. Was. He can't remember any of it. Having disappeared at the start of the war on some ludicrous quest, only now has he awoken on a strange planet called 'Earth'. Accepted back by his Autobot brethren, the void of his past haunts him endlessly, as does a mysterious, insatiable hunger. He's determined to get to the bottom of both--but with the fog they produce only deepening, how long does he have before he's lost eternally?

Chapter 1 --Word Count 7495

Orbital cycle: 6.3. Approximately 182.5 solar cycles since initial launch for attack on Autobot City. Diagnostic report: no structural damage detected. Energon levels: 27%. Energon levels of 50% recommended for full functionality. Defense systems: offline. Offensive systems: offline. Cloaking systems: online. Communications: partially online. Power saving mode recommended at Energon levels of 25%.

She records the report in her datapad down to the final recommendation, which really was not necessary, considering any proper engineer would have understood that by now, the ship should have entered power saving mode eons ago. If it had been placed in that mode when the other Decepticons had initially left, the current Energon levels would sit comfortably at the recommended 50%, and she would still have the long distance communications beacon up. But that was in the past, where they were supposed to have returned after a few solar cycles.

It had been dozens now, and Invert was starting to wonder if her brethren were going to return. A far more patient bot like Shockwave would not have felt any doubt up to the first double digit million years–how else had he held down Cybertron for so long? By comparison she was young, having barely lived for over a million. The hundreds of solar cycles that had passed as she was left alone on the Victory were now starting to seep into her processor, bringing with them questions of uncertainty.

The raid was supposed to last barely a few days. They’d brought everyone in the local system with them. The greatest warriors the Decepticon cause had were deployed. With all of them attacking at once, even the heavily fortified Autobot City should have been leveled in under a deca-cycle.

And yet there was silence. No cries of victory. No chaotic messages on the airways calling for aid. No declaration of retreat. Just silence.

They couldn’t be defeated. If they’d been defeated they would have retreated back to Victory. If they’d gone back to Cybertron on Astrotrain, then surely Shockwave would have contacted her on earth. He knew her name. He knew he’d sent her there orbital cycles ago. He’d know they’d left her behind to hold down the fort.

There was, of course, one other option. Silence was begetting of only a few characteristics when it came to the living. The Autobots, surely, wouldn’t. They were too soft-hearted. But if the attack had truly gone so badly, and they’d deigned it necessary–

Total obliteration. Total razing. Total loss.

She pushed the thoughts swirling in her processor aside and focused back on Victory’s main computer, typing in a few commands.

“Victory, run an internal scan. How are your habsuits looking?”

A map of Victory’s internal structure appeared on the screen before her. Dozens of rooms were selected and zoomed in on, each of which specifically served as living space. One by one they started as black, then turned white as they were provided the all clear.

Structure: stable. Living conditions: adjusted. Doors: unlocked.

“Alright, that’s good…” she muttered to herself, swapping to the cameras on the outside of the ship. They revealed an empty sea around her, dark and creeping with small organics. Their crude forms made her cringe, even in the restricted view she had of them. “Gross…Victory, illuminate your external hull.”

Victory obeyed, revealing a vast expanse of metal currently covered in the earth version of space barnacles. The white-shelled creatures had opened their filthy maws, extending forth feelers characteristic of some kind of horror show. Invert grimaced and swapped the camera views, checking instead on the door to the airlock. It was immaculately clean unlike the hull, though a few many legged organics crawled across it.

She checked the back of the ship, its thrusters, its scope, and finally its body. Making a note of each location that needed proper cleaning, Invert tapped the information into her datapad and closed the camera system before issuing another command. “Victory, check the wavelengths for any signs of communication.”

The screen before her went black, turning to a single unmoving flat line. She stared at it in silence, waiting for a peak, a leap, a blur, a single beat to indicate that anyone was out there.

Nothing happened.

Frowning to herself, she tapped a button on the keyboard before her–the one for “broadcast”.

“Fellow Decepticons,” she said, “if any of you are out there, I am Invert of Cybertron, broadcasting from the Earth base Victory. I am alone here and have been so since the attack on Autobot City. If you are hearing this message, please respond.”

Her servo left the button and she waited. And waited. And waited.

And waited.

And nothing came, as it never did.

She vented and focused back on her datapad, the frown perched upon her face seemingly eager to make it a permanent home. There was her chore list, plain and simple. It would take her several megacycles to complete: clean the habsuits, clean the storage vault, clean the weapons vault, clean the hallways, feed Victory, scrape away the organics on Victory’s hull, manage the outside of Victory, air another message after seven megacycles, spy on the Autobots if possible.

If possible. The last one was becoming an increasingly harder task to pull off. She was no Soundwave, and Victory’s listening equipment had been down for a while now to preserve power. Furthermore the equipment in Soundwave’s habsuit was either completely foreign or off-limits to her. He may not be here now, but he would return, like the others would, and if he found out she’d been messing with his items, well. She was only a lowly foot soldier, and he was the head of communications of the Decepticon cause.

She’d be lucky if only her wings were broken off and used to decorate his sparsely covered habsuit.

Speaking of her wings…she cast a glance down at the inverted things, which pointed towards the ground as opposed to the air. They would do her no favors in navigating the outside of the ship and certainly no aid in reaching the higher spots in the larger habsuits. Her boosters were functional, but the Energon they’d consume to keep her airborne would drain her at twice the levels of a normal Seeker.

She’d have to use them sparingly if she wanted to continue her present consumption rate of only one Energon cube a day. If she offlined from low power, that was fine; eventually her brethren would return, find her, and bring her back. But without her, no one would feed Victory, who would eventually offline from low power. Victory had to stay online, no matter what.

Where else would the Decepticons go when they came back, if they didn’t have Victory?

“I’ll keep you going, girl…” she whispered as she left the control room, reaching a hand out to run along the walls of the ship. Victory, as usual, was silent. It always was.

Perhaps none of the other Decepticons had shared her sentiment, but Invert had always thought of The Victory (Victory for short) as a fellow ‘con. It was a crashed ship, yes, but it was alive and functional, and it provided them a home within its body. Victory could respond to commands and hold conversations if it so wished; just the majority of the time, it preferred not to. For all she knew Victory was just trapped in permanent stasis lock, and would perhaps free itself one day.

As such, it was important to take care of Victory, for more purposes than just maintaining a Decepticon earth base. Victory was an ally with much greater might than her. If it fell, everything was lost.

That was why they’d left her behind when the entire cause had prepared for the assault on Autobot City–it had to be. Someone had to take care of Victory and it was for the better that that someone was her. Perhaps it had been said to her in a less kind way, but the others had had a point when they said that someone who couldn’t contribute properly to a fight would be better off staying behind.

Okay, they’d said it a lot less kindly. More so, they’d chided her that a flightless Seeker was utterly useless on the field despite whatever “special talent” Shockwave had promised she possessed. And for the battle of Autobot City, they needed soldiers who were functional, powerful, and wouldn’t prove dangerous to their allies as well as their foes. Besides, for swelling their numbers, they had the Insecticon clones. So someone like her, broken, glitched, and more of a liability than anything else, would only be good for ensuring that Victory didn’t somehow miraculously break while they were gone.

Because really, if Victory was invaded, it wasn’t that big of a deal. The ship was equipped to deal with invasions. Its defensive systems were more than adequate for dispatching invaders both inside and out. Invert was only present within it to mop up the Energon remains of whoever was fool enough to try.

No one had been–but that could also be attributed to the fact that the Autobots didn’t seem to know where the Decepticon base was. That, or they just didn’t care. Invert preferred the former. Why would it be inconsequential to know where the enemy’s base was, where they were likely to crawl back to and lick their wounds? And surely they were licking their wounds somewhere out there, weren’t they?

So why hadn’t they come back?

She pushed the thought away again and threw open one of the few cleaning closets the ship possessed, grabbing all the equipment she’d need to properly clear out all the habsuits. Nowadays it was more dusting than anything else, but she still brought along a mop and bucket, just in case.

The habsuits would start with Starscream’s, of course, because if she cleaned anyone else’s first and he found out, he’d throw a fit. And a fit from her commander was not something Invert wanted to sit through. He always treated her with more vitriol than any of the other Seekers, no matter how inconsequential her mistakes might be compared to theirs. She had an ounce of resentment towards him for it, countered only by the fact that, no matter how awful Starscream could be, he was deserving of respect for his flight abilities.

But that was a low bar. Any winged Decepticon could fly circles around her while all she could do was watch and seethe.

She vented and tapped the passcode to his habsuit’s door into its keypad, the double doors opening to reveal a pristine and lavishly decorated room. Starscream was nothing if not dramatic and narcissistic. All the valuables and self-care items stored in his habsuit spoke lengths to just what he’d do for a decent polish. Cleaning it was always a nightmare, even after all the times she’d done it before. If even one item was an inch out of place, she’d hear about it later.

A tiny chuckle escaped her at the thought–when was the last time she’d heard Starscream’s voice for any purpose? Be it admonishing her for attempting even once to be a proper Seeker, bossing her around, treating her as his personal slave, or verbally abusing her to let his Megatron-induced anger out, it had been so long she almost found herself forgetting how cruel the insults had been.

Almost. She entered his habsuit with her cleaning gear and checked everything over–berth, vanity, table, overly expensive one of a kind statue in his image, all the data-pads he pretended didn’t contain failed plans to assassinate their great leader, full length mirror that somehow hadn’t been broken, each and every one of his polishes and maintenance equipment, and of course, the additional weapons he kept on the wall.

There wasn’t a speck of dust on anything nor any indication of water damage. The berth was made perfectly.. The floor was clean save for her own pedeprints. And the metal of the walls gleamed like it’d been treated with the same care as Starscream himself.

There was nothing to clean, but she still gave everything a dust off, just to be safe. Giving everything one final look over for rust, Invert confirmed there to be no contamination on any of Starscream’s immensely precious belongings and left his habsuit, locking it behind her.

One down. At least fifty more to go. She vented again and moved to the next.

—-----

Maintenance was finished by the time the Earth’s sun moved high into the sky. Her internal clock read 16:23, a new method of telling time that had been adjusted for her when she’d arrived on Earth. The planet operated on a twenty-four megacycle basis, working around when the sun would orbit to the other side of the planet. The absence of the sun was named “night”, and could occur anywhere from 17:00-21:00, sometimes later. Having spent much of her time on Cybertron, she had been unaccustomed to Earth’s time, and figured it to be useless for the majority of her stay on the planet.

“Night” had its benefits, though. Its darkness concealed well, and most organics chose to enter recharge when it came on. It was the perfect time to enact plots, schemes, and occasional terrorist attacks on Autobot City.

The season Earth was presently in was dubbed “summer”. That meant night would not come until 21:00. She had time. After finishing with the habsuits, Invert focused on maintaining Victory.

At 16:28 she scraped away the organics on the outside of the hull, using her thrusters to properly climb up onto it. Finishing the front at 17:34, she headed to the side, then the back, ending at 18:20. Once back inside, she accessed the Energon vault and took stock before feeding Victory.

92 cubes left. Victory sufficed on ten per day. Power saving mode was beginning to look tempting now, if not for the risk that it would cease cloaking. And considering how often she had to transmit, the loss would be nothing short of catastrophic.

More Energon was needed, then. She’d have to ration herself more. She fit eleven cubes in her arms and brought them to Victory’s engine. As they were tossed in she held the one extra up.

“To another cycle, Victory.” It was brought to her dermas and promptly consumed.

Victory gave no response, as always. Invert stared at the empty cube in her servos for only a second before turning to take it back to storage.

At which point Victory’s system suddenly lit up. The screen turned on behind her, displaying a map of the planet and pinging a specific point somewhere in Asia. Invert looked back and raised her brows.

“SOS signal of Decepticon origin detected,” Victory stated in its monotone voice. “Displaying coordinates on screen. Incoming message. Playing now.”

Before Invert could even brace herself, an unholy buzzing suddenly sounded through the speakers, so shrill and constant that she collapsed to one knee, instinctively slamming her servos over her audials. Gritting her dentae she opened her hub and turned her audials all the way down, which made the buzzing just tolerable enough for her to reach Victory’s main computer and slam her fist on the OFF button.

The sound stopped so suddenly it left her processor ringing. She blinked several times, then knocked a fist against the side of her helm, shaking it a few times to properly orient herself.

Victory had gone silent again, but continued to display the ping and its coordinates. Invert looked up at them, transcribing them in her memory. What kind of distress signal had that been? Victory’s audio systems must be going, perhaps from too much time spent under the Earth’s water. An SOS signal usually captured the sound of blaster fire, of desperate voices crying for help, of bitter regret as whatever ‘con was on the other end laid aside his pride to admit he needed back-up.

That thought made her uneasy. Buzzing. Why have an SOS signal that was nothing but buzzing?

“Victory…” she paused, winced, and told herself that it wasn’t going to hurt as badly the second time. “Play the SOS signal again. At a decreased volume!”

It complied, the loud, painful buzzing sounding over the speakers once more. Invert increased her audials this time, even though the sound made her want to rip them out of her helm. Listening closely, she focused on differentiating corrupted audio from what might be beneath, be it voices, blaster fire, or the sound of fleeing pedesteps.

But the clip ended without any differentiating sounds. She found that odd, and replayed it in her processor again and again, trying to filter through it. Nothing. Just buzzing.

“Victory, run a diagnostic on your audio systems,” she ordered. The screen changed as Victory did just that, then returned several cycles later with a clear report: nothing was wrong.

The Energon she’d consumed sat uneasily in her tank. Invert grimaced. “Display the coordinates again,” she commanded, though they were already saved to her memory. Seeing them on the screen solidified her doubts.

Bali. There was a ship in Bali that she knew about, one that had harbored several unsavory occupants of the Decepticon cause. They, too, had disappeared after the attack on Autobot City.

Insecticons. Members of the cause notorious for how untrustworthy they were. She hadn’t been around for all the cases where they’d proven themselves to be nothing but hassles who only cared for endless consumption, but she’d read reports of actions and abilities. They were a self-contained group and stuck to their own–why would they call for help now, several orbital cycles after their last appearance in Autobot City?

Buzzing. Their entire signal had just been buzzing. She frowned, thinking it over. Their alt modes were based off of filthy organics, and as such, carried some characteristics of the ugly things. Was the buzzing a possible side effect of that? But they could speak, so why wouldn’t they?

Unless they weren’t able to, for some reason? During an SOS signal?

An SOS signal from a self-contained, proud group, perfectly capable of surviving on their own, that contained an off-putting buzz likely made to avoid speaking.

Just what were they facing out there that would cause such behavior?

“Victory, open a comm to the Insecticon ship,” she said, leaning over the control panel. “Insecticons, this is Invert, speaking to you from the Decepticon base The Victory. Come in Insecticons.”

Silence.

“Come in Insecticons.”

The ping repeated itself again and again. SOS. SOS. SOS.

No one was going to answer. Her frown deepened and she stepped away from the control panel. The only Decepticon here was her, the last on Earth, for all she knew. If they weren’t answering, they could be offline for all she knew. Or worse, it could be an Autobot trap, and she’d be playing right into their hands.

But if it wasn’t, and someone was there on the other side, waiting for help, desperately trying to reach any other Decepticon on this planet…

Even if they were gross Insecticons…

Rescue would fall to her. And though she would be taking a huge risk, with no guarantee for results, with the possibility of capture or permanent offlining…

It was, finally, something to do. Something beyond just maintaining Victory. Something that was a real mission. Something that could get her honor, respect, and maybe even a friend!

Her frown gradually gave way to a grin. Her first real mission. Her first real rescue. Her first chance to make a decision on her own, with no one ordering her what side to choose.

Oh, she was excited. It didn’t matter that her jet mode struggled to fly and that she’d need to pack away six cubes of additional Energon for the journey and her weapon–she was getting out, and she was going to rescue those Insecticons.

“Victory, open the weapon’s vault,” she eagerly commanded, taking off down the hall. “And prepare the hangar for take-off.”

—------------------

“I think you’ve had enough, bud.”

He raised tired optics from the glass currently gripped like a lifeline in his servos, the pink Energon within rippling from how his arm shook. Upon the bartender, a shorter mech with a white and yellow paint job, did his gaze land. Whatever was in it seemed enough to cause them to flinch, but they held their ground, clearly experienced in dealing with the far more unruly.

“Seriously. You’ve had five of those in the past Earth hour. How you’re not horrendously overfueled by now, I dunno, but you’re on your way to an early grave if you keep that up.” They gave him a hard frown, narrowing their optics behind their visor. “I’m not havin’ it on record that someone died at my bar because of my negligence.”

Luster didn’t answer them at first, letting his gaze drift back down to the Energon swirling in the glass he held. How it hadn’t cracked yet spoke to its quality, or perhaps how weak he’d become. Either worked.

The glass was half-drained. It hadn’t tasted like anything in particular. He never ordered for the flavor, since anything they could provide him would be irrelevant. His glossa didn’t taste like it once must have, even if the memories of what had been felt like they existed just beyond a fog barrier. And besides, no matter how much he drank, his tank never felt full.

Not anymore.

He pulled up a report on his tank capacity in his hub–93% capacity. Ignoring the bartender, he brought the glass to his derma and promptly chugged, feeling his frame protest against more. Another tank report came in–100%. If he consumed anymore, he’d have to purge.

There was still a drop at the bottom. He forced it down despite the warnings and slid the glass forward, looking just past the bartender, never at them.

“One for the road,” he rasped, venting harshly. “Please.”

“Absolutely not. If you’re not at capacity by this point your sensor’s faulty.” They took the glass with what almost seemed like disgust. “Aren’t you supposed to be here with your guardian, anyways? Where is he?”

Guardian. He coughed at the word, not because he wanted to, but because it reminded him of what his life had become. The motion jarred the Energon inside of him and he felt sick. Swallowing down the urge to purge, Luster moved to shaky pedes, gripping the bar for support.

“I don’t need him,” he grumbled. “I’m not a Sparkling. I’m not a protoform. I’m…I was someone, before, I don’t need a guardian.”

The bartender grimaced. “Luster…look, buddy. I didn’t know you before the war. I can’t say I’ve ever heard of your work. I know Magnus says you did somethin’ important before the retreat from Cybertron. But all that’s in the past now, aight? This is Earth, not Cybertron, and we all know whatever it is you were lookin’ for, you…”

They paused as his cold optics finally focused on them, reconsidering their words.

“...We all know you had some tragedy while you were out there. Real sad. No one here wouldn’t feel bad for you. But you can’t keep drinkin’ yourself to death over it. And I know you’re a grown ‘bot, but considerin’ the memory problems and all…well…course we all think you could use a guardian.”

A low rumble escaped from somewhere deep within him. Tank capacity at 99%. He needed more Energon.

“One more for the road,” he asked again. “Please. I’ll pay you double for it.”

Their frown tightened. “I’m calling Uptick.”

“No.” It came out harsher and faster than he intended, sounding like the warning growl of a tiger. His optics widened and he closed them, the gentle lighting of the bar suddenly too much. “Please. No. Don’t call him.”

They had their hand to their helm as they grimaced at him. Luster growled and turned away, almost falling over as he did. His balance equilibrator was off courtesy of overfueling, and focusing on what was normally a clear beeline for the door was difficult. One pede in front of the other. One pede in front of the other.

“Luster! You’re not goin’ out alone?” The bartender called after him. He ignored them, turning down his audials to focus on walking.

Spilling out of the bar, he stumbled for the nearest wall and rested a hand against it, leaning on it for dear life. His head was spinning. Standing was becoming increasingly difficult.

Tank capacity at 98%.

It wouldn’t stay there long. He needed to be back in his habsuit before that happened. Which way to his habsuit? He focused on his internal map, pulling it up in his hub and searching the coordinates. A small box lit up on Metroplex’s form, his tracking systems illustrating a path for him to take milliseconds later.

It was late. Autobots didn’t sleep, not really, but it was likely that, due to the time of the planet, he wouldn’t run into anyone. Luster vented again, feeling warm Energon slip out from between his lips as he did so, and began the journey back to the place he was temporarily calling ‘home’.

The path his systems had picked took him through some of Metroplex’s tighter corridors. On Cybertron, back before he had launched on the fateful mission that took his memory from him, he would have once felt nervous. Now he felt nothing, nothing besides urgency, urgency that did not originate from fear of being attacked or robbed.

No, it was urgency that sprouted from the deepest recesses of himself, telling him to hide for his self-preservation, for if he did not, the symptoms would soon manifest, and in his present state, he didn’t know if he could take them.

He made it about halfway before his proximity sensor went off. With his audials turned so low, he realized he hadn’t picked up the voice of whoever was calling to him, and they’d approached, their presence now close enough to seemingly reach out and touch him.

He turned his helm, uncaring, for whoever it was could not be worse than–

Him.

Uptick was following within grabbing distance of him, his dermas moving as he ranted on about something Luster was glad he couldn’t hear. He paused in his movement and Uptick did the same, though he didn’t once stop talking. Of course he didn’t.

Slowly, Luster turned his audials back on, just enough to make out the slew of Uptick’s commentary like the gentle, cooing sound of a cyber pigeon.

“--and furthermore you are in direct violation of your curfew, which states you aren’t to be out beyond the Earth hour of 21:00; it is presently 01:20 and here you are wandering the passages of Metroplex like a lost turbofox!” He put both hands on his hips, glaring Luster down. “This is your second warning. You know what happens if I have to issue a third.”

He shuttered his optics and stared blankly just beyond Uptick. “You lock me up in the clinic until I’m completely fixed or I don’t function anymore?”

“What?” He sounded incredulous. “No! I’m not here to–do you consider this some kind of torture? Luster, I’m trying to help you!”

“Then can you leave me alone?” He grumbled, turning away and continuing on his predetermined path. “I’ll be fine…I just need to go back…”

Back to where? The habsuit? The ship? The planet of fog in his memories? Back, back. Always back.

“You need to stop drinking,” Uptick scolded, grabbing his shoulder and bringing him to a halt. “And stop these late night wanderings. Everyone’s concerned for you because of them.”

He let his shoulders slump.

“That’s a lie and you know it. The only ones who still care about me are the medics who want to poke my processor. Now can I please go back home?”

The buzz was starting to fade. He didn’t get that nice warmth from Energon overfueling for long anymore. Balance was restoring. And worst of all, the reports were coming in.

Tank capacity at 95%. Fuel proficiency at 20%. Uptake at %$^&&*^# levels. Seek alternate methods of refueling.

Uptick let out a long sigh. “Let me walk you back. There’s no point in you getting lost and scaring others again.”

He didn’t fight the offer. There was no point in it. Once Uptick was convinced of doing something, he wouldn’t stop until it was done–especially if that task regarded protecting someone else.

So he trudged along, the ‘bot slated as his “guardian” trailing just behind him. “Guardian”. “Caretaker” was more like it. Uptick followed him everywhere, kept an eye on how much Energon he was consuming, tracked his recharge cycles, kept a close eye on just what activities he engaged with on a daily basis, and probably had a tracker installed beneath his aft to keep him from ever having an ounce of privacy.

Of course he did, though, after that night with the other ‘bots. He knew what he had been doing and why he had been doing it. He just didn’t know why he’d stopped.

The Autobots he’d frightened were significantly less green than he was. That wouldn’t keep them safe. They’d returned to their habsuit to begin a cycle of “enjoying one another’s company”. That was why he’d picked them. Two for one. It would have made the whole situation easier on them all.

Except it hadn’t been easier on anyone, especially him. They’d both become creeped out when, upon discovering him in their personal quarters, staring at their recharge slabs with optics more devoid than a moon, he’d purged his dinner and collapsed, whining like a sick turbofox.

That was when Uptick had been assigned as his caretaker. There wasn’t anything wrong with Uptick, by any means, and he didn’t hate him. He was, like all Enforcers, large and imposing, and tended to play by the rules too much. His paint was cheerful colors of blue, green, and white, meant to match with the new planet he was eager to call home. And his personality was surprisingly forgiving–for being the sucker stuck with the mental patient, he had quite a tolerance for nonsense.

No, Luster despised Uptick’s company for an entire other reason. One that didn’t have to do with how closely he watched him, how constantly he reminded him to attend his appointments, or how constantly he changed his curfews and rules.

It had to do with his sparkbeat. With how close he insisted on staying, Luster could hear the damnable thing’s constant pulsing despite the layers of glass and metal and wires separating them. It was loud and full of vibrant life.

He could feel the solvent building in his mouth.

Tank capacity at 93%.

—-------------------------------

The habsuit allotted to him was at the very end of Metroplex’s furthest row. It was close to the wall, away from any streets or alleys. The original request put in regarding a space for him had placed him near the clinic, where other Cybertronians would be passing by. His vehement rejection of the idea had only been approved after the arguing had made him purge.

Uptick brought him right to the sliding door, inputting the code to open it on its keypad. The metal let out a quiet shff as it slid open, revealing the small space within. He turned, giving Luster a look.

“Your visit tomorrow is at 09:20, Earth hours. I’ve already sent you the data package. You seem to have ignored the first four.” There was a hint of annoyance in his voice as he raised a servo to his helm. “I’ll send you another. Be there on time, please, so I don’t have to come here and convince you, alright?”

“Convince”. Luster almost scoffed at the word. The heaviness that came with overfueling had left him by now. With its cloud gone, he found himself choking on bitterness again.

Instead, he vented, giving a tiny nod.

“Alright.” Stepping past Uptick, he paused in the threshold of his habsuit when a hand suddenly landed back on his shoulder.

“Luster. You know these visits are for your health, right? No one here wants to hurt you. We don’t see you as a processor to be poked.”

“I know.” He didn’t turn around. The lights in his habsuit, motion activated, had turned on, illuminating the sparse few belongings within it.

“I mean it.” His grip tightened ever so slightly, then released. “We want to help you. All of us.”

“I know,” he repeated. “Now please leave me alone.”

Uptick said nothing as the door slid closed, sealing him, and the outside world, away. Luster stepped fully into his habsuit and paused, gaze fixed on the berth.

It was a recharge slab, standard issue. They’d tried to pull a better one for him due to his circumstances–the medic’s had posited that he may have recharging terrors. They’d been right, of course, but he knew it wasn’t the fault of the slab, so he’d let it lie. They didn’t need to know about the terrors that plagued him, for they were meaningless, and besides, if they knew, they’d want to keep a closer eye on him.

Who cared about terrors that only consisted of strange humming noises, anyways?

Besides, a closer eye was the exact opposite of what he needed on him. If they watched him more closely, they’d take him away from the bar. They’d take him away from his quiet habsuit. They’d take him away from his place at the edge of their world and draw him right into the middle.

And if they did that, he had no idea how long he could ensure their safety.

He stepped over to the slab, observing his reflection in it. They’d taken away the mirror after he’d shown distress staring into it. Something about his frame just didn’t feel right, and the more he looked at it, the more out of place he felt.

His paint was blue, a gaudy blue, one with a sheen to it that made him literally shine. One of the medics had stated his color was particularly reminiscent of a bird known as the “peacock” on earth. He’d never met the thing, but from the way they’d snickered, he assumed it was excessive.

On his chassis were diamonds, which, according to the doctors, had been placed there, willingly, by him. He couldn’t imagine why he would have ever reasoned to do such a thing. The stones weakened the integrity of his armor, and furthermore, they drew attention. Cut into varying shapes, they were arranged into delicate patterns that continued on his faceplate, where several more had been embedded just below his optics. Had been. When they found him, all that were left were the indentations of what had been. They now felt like ugly scars.

The gemstones were gaudy enough, but worse, in his opinion, were his drills. Their blades rested comfortably on his arms, with the largest sitting on his back as a heavy extension. His treads were on his legs, which, combined with the weight of the drill, made even lifting the damnable things a chore. According to the medics he hadn’t even been a miner back in the day, but a scientist of sorts, so why he was so equipped for drilling, he couldn’t even say.

All of this shaped up to make his frame bulky and uncomfortable. His steps were heavy. His pieces tended to bump into things. And his excessive decorations drew gazes and snickers alike from other mechs.

He hated the face that looked back at him. The optics were green, a gaudy green, because apparently, he’d once been obsessed with fashion, and made himself a different pair of colored optics for every day of the week. The others were lost, but the green he’d been wearing when he disappeared weren’t.

His faceplate was a pale gray, like most mechs tended to be. Pale, with those intricate, delicate etchings, designed to make him look ‘beautiful’. His helm had a sharp point in the middle, reaching about halfway down, and of course, in the middle of it was another gemstone. This one, however, was cracked.

A cracked gemstone accompanied by diamond shaped holes that had once held something supposedly precious. That was all he saw when he looked at himself.

He tore his optics away from the visage and sat on the berth, keeping his pedes on the floor as he turned to look at his habsuit. It had a desk, a window, a few datapads, and a small storage shelf. That was all.

They’d offered to bring him some of his surviving “collection”, whatever that meant. He’d declined.

The ceiling lights dimmed as he tried to lay down on his back, found it impossible, and instead did so on his side. He’d never get used to the damnable drill on his back, he just knew it. It wasn’t supposed to be there. It hadn’t been there before. Why did he have a drill on his back? He couldn’t ever remember a time where he did.

But that was the problem with remembering. He couldn’t remember much of anything.

It had been only three Earth “months” (solar cycles?) ago that he had landed on the planet, in an unmarked spaceship that had been dated back to the middle of the war. The bots who had discovered him found his frame locked in a stasis pod, almost offline from how little power he’d had left. Taking him back to Autobot city, an emergency transfer of Energon and a strong shock to his processor had brought him back online.

And that was when the trouble had begun. He’d awoken in a room he didn’t recognize, in a time he didn’t know, in a place he’d never been before. He still remembered coming online. For so long it had been just darkness, darkness and the very hum of the universe, the electrical pulses that dictated the existence of life, making up the entirety of his world. When he’d come online, that hum had ebbed, becoming less than background noise.

It had felt like being cut off from a lifeline. His optics had onlined, and he had been greeted with the sight of one of the Autobot medics, First Aid. There was celebration to be had as he had groaned and tried to sit up, confused, delirious, and wondering just how he’d gotten to this strange place. They’d insisted he stay down until his energon reserves were replenished.

But even when his tank hit its safe capacity, a feeling that should have left him satiated and energized, he hadn’t had the strength to properly move. He’d known in that very instant, as the question arose as to why, that something was wrong with him.

Another electrical shock had returned the ability to properly move to him. They released him from the medical bay after he’d demonstrated he could walk–right into the hands of their Enforcers. For according to their records, he was not to be alone, and the question of just what had happened on his mission was hanging heavier than a spaceship in orbit.

The issue of his memory had arisen almost immediately. They’d asked him his name. They’d asked him why he had been alone. They’d asked him what had happened.

He couldn’t remember any of it.

“His processor seems to have been damaged, sir.” He remembered one of them saying, looking over the scan that had been provided from the medical bay. “They’ve found evidence that a code was written to delete some memories, but even more than that…” The datapad had been handed over, and the interrogator sucked in air through his denta. “How is he even still functional, with scrambling that bad?”

It looked like his processor had been ripped out, smashed, and placed back into his helm. He had no recollection of any of it.

“Do you remember why you left?”

“Do you remember the name of your ship?”

“Do you remember the research you’d been engaging with when you’d decided to leave?”

“Do you remember what you found?”

“Do you remember Solace?”

“Do you remember what happened to him?”

“What happened to Solace?”

Who’s Solace?

The interview had ended shortly after.

He vented, watching the lights in the ceiling turn down. Uptick’s data package pushed at the edge of his internal hub. He accepted it because he had no other choice.

Solace. The name haunted him like a specter. Solace. Who was Solace? Solace had been someone he’d been very close with, apparently. Solace had been someone so important to him that he’d left Cybertron with him, in search of something mysterious to help the Autobot war effort. They’d been joined at the hip all their lives, apparently,

And he couldn’t remember a single thing about the mech. But why?

He shuttered his optics and tried to think back to the day he’d left Cybertron. It had been sometime in the middle of the war, apparently. He’d made some big decision and gotten a ship somehow. He was going to prove something, or save them all, or change the tide of the war. Something heroic, or whatever. They’d said he had once been outgoing.

He tried to picture himself standing on Cybertron (did he even remember Cybertron?), chassis puffed out, engine revving, the diamonds on his faceplate and chest glittering. A huge smile was on his face. He stood before the ship he’d arrived on, except instead of its decrepit state, it was a fully functioning spaceship, fresh off the factory line, without a single chip on the paint.

Before him was a crowd of Autobots. They were cheering his name. Optimus Prime himself was there to see him off.

He looks them over and grins widely, holding his arms out. Yes, he was going to save them all. He was going to travel far away, find something, and help end the war. He would be so full of hope, nothing could dampen his spirits.

And there, beside him, would be Solace. Solace, his best friend, his one in a billion, his greatest ally.

But when he looks beside him, there is no Solace.

There was only fog, and blank space, and when he looked back, the planet of Cybertron was empty, a barren wasteland of gray. The sky was dark velvet blue. Stars glittered like diamonds overhead.

There were stars in his chassis. He blinked once, twice. The planet was empty, and he was full of stars, and he was alone.

And here, alone, in the emptiness of space, he floated, watching all of existence fall away and turn into the hum of electromagnetic pulses indicating life. Life that he could not see or touch. Life he could only listen to as he lay dreaming, drifting through the universe alone.

In his cradle of stars, dead $^%#%&*^&8 waits dreaming.

Not alone, really. He had not been alone while he was dreaming. He had heard something else in the hum.

He replayed the sound again, the hum he was so familiar with. It was millions of years worth of noise, stored within his processor because he had nothing else to comprehend for all of it. 217 gigabytes of nothing but humming. His processor ran through all of it in mere minutes, then ran through it again.

There was something beneath all of the noise, something explicitly subtle. He opened his internal hub and pulled up a spectrograph. The noise was replayed again.

The waves showed up as nothing in particular for a long time. Then, slowly, they began to form a curve. One by one, each contributed a single line, through millions of years, until finally, he reached himself now, still intuned, just barely, to the electromagnetic pulses of life.

The image looking back at him was in the shape of a crescent. It was the very shape which he saw in his charge terrors, the one which, ever present, hung in the background, watching him like a cybercat would a mouse.

His spark felt cold. He closed the spectrograph and opened his optics, staring at the gentle light of Earth’s moon shining in through the window. His internal clock beeped a warning to him–five hours until he was designated to be at the clinic. A pop-up recommending he enter recharge appeared. He moved to close it.

Tank capacity at 68%. Fuel uptake at &%#$^*(&%$$%&&%$%^^^&* Seek alternate fuel source. Seek alternate fuel source. Seek alternate fuel source.

Dozens more appeared at the death of the one. He pushed the notifications away.

Seek alternate fuel source.

They came back, one after the other. His frame felt like it had been starved of Energon for years.

Seek alternate fuel source.

He forced his optics to shutter, letting the notifications drown out the fear he felt.

Seek alternate fuel source.

It was going to be a long recharge.

#my writing #my ocs #tf #yes its transformers. no im not tagging it with that i dont want it showing up in that tag #me and my 20 followers ONLY #hello everyone i have been going crazy over these characters and no this is not all of them #wait till part 2 :)#six cycles later #oc: invert #oc: luster

10 notes · View notes

literaticat · 2 months

Note

With Algonquin closing, ive been hearing talk that YA is dying, YA writers are ditching YA to write adult, and only unicorns and super trendy YA books will get bought now. As a debut author, this is making me feel SO doom and gloom about my career even before it’s started! Do you have any thoughts? Thank u Jenn !

Not to be mean, but baby where have you BEEN?

YA has been "Dying" for like, the better part of a decade, and has been fully rigor mortis, toe up with a tag on it, authors "ditching YA", etc, for several years. If anything, YA has recently experienced something of a reanimation -- the former corpse has officially got a pulse again and is breathing, though perhaps still a little clammy. The hotness of 2024 is complaining about how MIDDLE GRADE is dead. Keep up! ;-)

In reality, everything is cyclical. Categories or genres or trends or whatever boom, they get oversaturated, sales fall off, eventually they come back. And people ALWAYS say that "publishing is dying" that "only trendy books will be able to be bought now" or whatever whatever. I was reading DEAR GENIUS, the collected letters of Ursula Nordstrom (highly recommend btw), and there was this whole part in there about bookstore people complaining that TV was destroying the publishing industry, nobody would buy books anymore, authors should just pack it in, etc. It was literally the same conversation, and that was like 70 years ago.

(For a bit of a reality check, you might check out this post from the pinned FAQ: I heard that traditional publishing is DEAD, is that true?)

As for your opening premise, I think it is faulty, AYR closing hasn't really got much to do with the other stuff.

To be clear: I love Algonquin Young Readers. I have sold many a beautiful book to AYR over the years; they were my special favorite. (Don't tell the others!) Their founding publisher, Elise Howard, who I aspire to be for real, is an absolute Dear Genius herself and a wonderful editor and person (and now, agent)!

I am very grateful to have been able to work with the whole team there for the past decade, and I am sad that the program Elise started and Cheryl Klein and the others continued will be coming to a close, and that two wonderful editors and a terrific marketing person will be looking for new jobs (but I do hope/believe/feel strongly that they will all land in good spots, they are really great!) -- HOWEVER.

Algonquin was bought by Little Brown several years ago. And whilst Algonquin the brand is closing now, those books are not disappearing, they are just being folded in to LB. In other words, the backlist books will still be in print, and the frontlist/forthcoming books are still going to be published, just with a different publisher name on the spine. Also Algonquin only published like... 2, maybe 3 new YA books per season? It's a small list! (Small but mighty! -- but still, very small!)

So.... I'm not sure what, if anything, the news of their closing says about the larger world of YA books? In other words, obviously it is NOT GREAT, it’s a sad loss, we loved that publisher, it's good for the publishing ecosystem to have a variety of publishers so fewer is not good, capitalism and massive corporate conglomeration and whatnot are sucky things, it's awful when nice people are out a job -- but there's zero reason for you to take that news as like, an OMEN about YOUR CAREER or something. It has nothing to do with you. Unless your book was coming out from Algonquin, it won't affect YOU at all. (And even if your debut WAS an AYR book... hopefully those effects would be minimal at the end of the day, as those books are still coming out!)

#young adult #publishing is hard #publishing stuff

9 notes · View notes

inlovewhithafairytale · 1 year

Text

I think we lost her part 2

I'll be good

Theo reaken x reader

never meant to start a fire I never meant to make you bleed I'll be a better man today

I'll be good, I'll be good And I'll love the world, like I should Yeah, I'll be good, I'll be good For all of the times that I never could

My past has tasted bitter for years now So I wield an iron fist Grace is just weakness Or so I've been told I've been cold, I've been merciless

But the blood on my hands scares me to death Maybe I'm waking up today

Yn slammed the door of the truck and started walking toward the MCcall household yawning. She walked toward the door and furrowed her eyebrows when she heard some yelling from the inside and someone angrily walking toward the door.

Malia appeared with her face into a decuided frown and stalked past her berely giving yn a hello.

"Well hello to you too bestie" yn muttured and walked into the house closing the door shut behind her. Scott inmidiatly appeared and his eyes widened in shock when he saw her.

"Yn.. uh what are you doing here?!"

"I told her to come" liam answered scott before yn had the chance to. Scott looked as if he would kill is own beta and liam lifted his hands up in defense "Idont think is fair that we lied to her and shes one of my best friends! She was literally going to kill herself!"

Yn raised an eyebrow at the alpha and the beta wondering what had gotten into them"you guys" they both turned around to face her "I am very confundida, and why does this even have to do with me?"

Scott started to say something to probably send her home when Yn heard a voice she though she'd never hear in her lifetime, a voice she could only hear in dreams.

"Yn?"

She rushed between liam and scott and into the kitchen and saw theo pushing himself to stand, blood falling from his nose.

His eyes widened when they met hers and yn drew in a sharp breath looking around, but scott liam and hayden were all looking between the both of them.

"Your'e here?"she whispered

"Hey baby" he answered giving her a small smile eyes full of tears.

Yn gave a breathy laugh and ran toward him wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his torso.

Theo held her tightly against him chuckling "oh god youre here, youre here, youre not dead"yn repeated aginst his neck as she held tightly onto him.

"Im here princess. And i dont plan on living any time soon" theo murmured aginst her hair and then kissed her cheek. Yn let go and theo set her down on the floor putting a hand aginst her cheek. Both their eyes were full of tears as they both chuckled happily. Then theo bent down and kissed her, putting both his hands against her face, lips fitting perfectly together moving in slow motion.

Yn pulled away after a moment and looked up to him smiling "I thought you were dead"

"Well not exactly "

"But scott said-" yns words hitched and she whipped around to face Scott. "You lied to me?" She demanded.

Scott blinked and nodded"yes, because i knew-"

"Where on earth has he been this past 3 months?"

"On hell with his sister" scott answered

Yn pursed her lips in a tight line and shook her head "how could you?! Scott ive trusted you with my life and you just couldnt keep the only person ive ever loved safe?"

"Yn hes KILLED people, he killed his own sister, he killed ME, he hurt your dad-"

I though you were the true alpha"yn snapped"i though you were the one with the heart of gold, the one who belived in second chances! The one who actually cared!" Yn swallowed down the tears that were threatening to fall" I gess i was wrong"

"I did what I had to do to protect the pack" scott said defended himself.

"Dont you think I know!" Yn screamed her eyes flashing their signature violet " I would do anything for the pack, to keep everyone safe, Im the one who tries to keeps everybody safe. But when it comes down to it YOU couldent keep the Only person I've ever loved safe, ive never asked for anything scott. Not once. Why on earth did you lie to me?"

Scott couldent find the right words he knew yn was angry, and he also knew she would do anything to protect the people she loved "I knew you'd raise hell if necessary to bring him back" he answered

"Yes I would!scott i tried to kill myself because i felt a gaping whole on my chest. I had constant nightmares and you saw me go through all that because you tried to keep the pack safe?because yo knew ill bring him back?!" Yn squintedher eyes dangerously "i genuinely despise you scott MCcall"

"Yn listen im sorry-" scott said trying to apologize

"You could have said that around 3 months ago dont you think?"

Yn turned reached for theo's hand who had been staying silent through all the conversation as well as the others. He took her hand and let himself be gided toward the door.

"Were are you going?" asked scott blocking their way

"Im living and theo is coming with me, try to stop me and I WILL raise hell" yn threatened

Scott moved out of the way and tried to look at his betas for help but hayden only shrugged "shes right" and liam went to follown them, katana in hand.

"Yn!" Liam called before they could exit the house

Yn turned around to face him and liam extended the katana for her to take"you would problay want this" he tould her

Yn gave him a small smile as she reached for the katana" thanks liam"

Liam nodded and looked at theo who gave him a silent thanks by giving him a nod wich he returned.

When they exited the house and theo saw his truck he gave her a small smile " you kept it"

Yn shrigged and gave him a tighed liped smile"its yours, it just felt like the only thing i had left from you." She reached the keys out to him " you drive"

"Nah give me a few days to adjust on being back"

Yn gave him a small nod "ok" she walaked toward the deivers side as theo got into the passangers.

Yn turned on the ignition, and once theo was in started driving home.

"Why did liam let you out?"

"He thought i still had Josh's power" he kept his gaze on the road " but I didnt"

"You dont have it anymore?"

"No, Joshs or tracy's im back to good old me" he answered giving her a sad little smile

"Thats great, I like old you" she spared a glance at him with a smile" its actually my favorite you"

Theo laughed and took her hand giving it a smalla squeez. Then as if he caughed a smell of something he opened small compartment between the seats.

"Uh dodnt open that" yn said trying to stop him but he just gave her a puzzled loom and pulled out a bottle of vodka half empty

"Or do..." yn said pursing her lips on a tight line and kepping her eyes fixed on the road.

Theo looked from the bottle to her eyebrows raised "didnt know you drinked"

" I didnt."

"Does this have to maybe do with the fact that you said earlier you almost killed youself" he asked her quietly. Knowing he was walking on thin ice." Uh.. yeah" she answered her eyes till fixed in the road

"What happened?" His voice full of concern

Yn took a minute to answer "You were gone. You were Dead. And i just wanted to forget everything. Everybody was sympathetic but i knew they didnt even mean it. Everybody hated you" yn looked at theo who nodded at her to continue "so i took the bottke my dad kept hidden and downed it. I felt awful the next day. And thats an understatement, but just for a minute you know. I felt fine. I didnt feel anything anymore. So I took your truck and started driving every night to the look at point and sometimes malia found me there. Completely wasted. And thats how it went for 2 months. I went to school, locke myself in my room and do homework. Hit the shit out of my punch bag. And then drive to the look out point. Till one day i got in a fight with stiles and i decided that i didnt want to live anymore. So i downed a bottle of sleeping pills with vodka"

Theo drew in a sharp breath as he heard how much he actually meant to yn. How much she loved him, and it startled him. Be ause he thought he wasent meant to be loved.

"Dad found me in my room half an hour later and rushed me to the hospital were i spent 1 week in a bed"yn continued "it was awful. Dad made me promise him id never do it again. I actualky felt bad for everyone. They were all so worried. Stiles didnt live me out of hes sight till. Well you know.. got taken."

Once she parked the car in the driveway she spared a glace at theo.

He had tears in his eyes as he looked at her. Her hand securedly in his.

" Im so sorry" he whispered

"No oh god no theo" yns hand quickly went to his face " baby its not your fault, i shoulent have told you now"

"No, im glad you told me" he said swallowing down his tears " do you really love me that much?"

"To the point were i would kill myself to be with you, YeS" yn aswered lokking into his eyes " yes theo I love you, and i would do anything for you. dont. You. Ever. Doubt That.:

"I love you too yn. I love you so much" theo said gently squeezing the hand he held in his." Don't doubt that'

"Trust me. I don't " yn answered with a breathy laugh.

Theo rolled his eyes at her and then gave her a peck in the lips." So what do you plan on doing with this" he asked taking the bottle and lifting it

"Just live it in the car,dad would kill me if he knew I had that"

"Right" then he bent down and slided the bottle under his seat"there you go"

Yn chuckled and opened the door climing out of the car "so dads at work wich means we wont have to undergo akward questioning" she informed theo as they walked toward the doorway. Yn opened it and stepped in theo behind her. "Are you hungry? There's pasta. I can heat it up real quick"

"Uh no thanks, liam bought take out" theo answered smiling down at her.

"Kay" yn grinned back at him and took his hand leading him toward her room.

"Take a bath. You kind of smell" she said as they walked in, scruching her face into a smile

"Geez so hard" answered theo in mock pain. Yn just laughed and walked toward her drawer. Bent down and opened the botton one and pulled out one of theos shirt and pants.

"Here you go" she said straightening up and handing the clothes to him.

"I dont want to know?"

"There are clean towels in the bathroom "yn said ignoring him.

"Thanks mom" he jocked and kissed her cheek as he walked past her.

Yn stood there for a moment till she heard the water running with a big smile on her face.

He was back. Theo was finally back and alive. And soon they would get everyone the ghostriders took and everything would be alright.

Then she took off the taktop she had and her bra and pulled on an oversized shirt. And since she already had her pajama pant on climed to bed. Resting her back against the pillows.

She bent forward and retrieved a book next to her bedside. She was resting back comfortably when a notification rang on her phone. She 5ook it from the night table and ooened it to see it was Liam.

"Hey baby, liam asks where do we need 5o meet to get to the power thing"yn called

"Oh you mean the generator? Tell him its in the reserve" he answere from the bathroom.

"Okay...... uh, he asks 10 or 11 am, 11 right?

"Yeah" theo opened the door pulling on his shirt

Liam

Ok then

Wear protection ;)

Liam. NO

Yn turned off the phone chuckling at tye antics of the teenage werewolf

Theo sat down in the bed next ro her his back against the headboard.

"You look cute with your hair all wet" yn commented smiling up at him.

"Hmm"hummed theo nodding giving her a small smile"what are you reading?"

"The hunger games" yn answered lifting the book up.

"I saw the movie but never read the book"

"Youre welcome to read them anytime. This is actually the second book but the firt one has to be somewhere in my bookshelf."

"Ill take you up that offer" he muttered.

youtube

Then he gently slapped his tights gesturing her to come over" come here" he told her, more like a question that something else.

Yn smiled and sat on his lap. Her legs to one side and her head below the crook of his neck. She took one of his hands in hers and started playing with his fingers, while he ran his fingers through her hair with his other one. He pressed a kiss on the top of her head breathing her in, finally feeling as if he was finally home whit her in his arms.

"I never meant for you to get hurt" he whispered closing his eyes

" what do you mean?"yn softly asked him running her thumb softly on the top of his hand.

"I never meant it to be like this love, i never meant for you to get hurt. Ill be better yn. Ill be good" he muttered resting his chin on top of her head. yn could hear him sniffle as a tear rolled down his cheek "ill be good. I will try to be better. I will try to make things right. I shouldent have done what I did. I shouldent have hurt them. I shouldn't have been what ive been all this years. Ive been so cold. So heartless. So mercyless" he choked out tears falling. Yn held his hand betwee both of hers tightly. Letting him pour his feelings out." but yn. It scares me. All the blood in my hands terrifies me. And maybe. Maybe im waking up. Today. Ill be good. Ill be good" he sobbed. yn lifted her head ane put her arms around his neck letting him cry into her neck " I'll love the world like I should. I promise ill be good, for everyone I've ever hurt. For everything good ive ever doubted. For all the pain ive brought to you. For everything ive done all this years. For all those hipes and dreams ive killed. And for ever doubting you" he sobbed. Yn held him close as a few of her tears fell into his shirt. "Ill be good, I"ll be good" he repeated again

"I know you will theo" yn whispered " and promise ill be here. I promise I will always be here"

Theo snuggled his face into the crook of her neck and rounded his arms around her waist holding her close.

They sat there, holding each other. Till in the end yns eyelids closed without her consent, and she dozed off.

Theo felt her breath deepened and knew she had fallen asleep. He cautiously, trying not to wake her, rearranged the pillows. He leaned over and turned off the lights, and layed her in the mattress, tyen he laid down his front pressed to her back and rounded one of his arms around her waist.

"Mhh?" Yn hummed sleeply"sorry i just didnt sleep last night" she apologized sleeply

"Hey, its all right" theo cooed and yn turned around rounding one arm around his torso, snuggling closer and buring her face into his chest.

And there. They finally felt happy, like some part off them had finally returned. They felt like home

Ill edit this when I can but here it is!!

#teen wolf #fluff theo reaken #theo raekan x reader #teen wolf x y/n #teen wolf x reader #scott mccall #stiles sister #i love her

72 notes · View notes

bastionbibi · 5 months

Note

Question if it’s okay to ask: what is it that made Akai one of your favourites? Or at least someone that’s cool in your book

Man.... This is like asking why I love soup. Ok, I'm not sure if I can stay coherent but I'll try,

Ive been reading detco on and off since I was a was a wee child and even back then he was already one of my favorites because I like mystery, and he was the definition of that.

And this way before the revelation that he was a good guy too. There was this moment of 'yeah, okay, this is it, he's the one (that im not gonna be normal about)'. Specifically, I fell in love in that one scene where he met ran on a snowy night, something about that scene was just so striking, especially something about him that, despite how intimidating he sounded or looked, didn't set off any alarms in Ran, that was the point where I knew there's more to this character, and that I love him.

On another lighter note. I like his shinigami aesthetic, his one liner and lack of facial expression, I like his lonewolf tendency, how weirdly dependable he is and yet, he's not, in any way shape or form, charming.

Like that time where he confronted Gin for the first time, he could've told Jodie and Conan that he had a plan to elude the BO but he didn't, he acted alone, he's extremely slow to trust but when he does, he pledge to them his true loyalty. I mean, Conan was just a child in his eyes (even though now he knows him as Shinichi), and yet since he decided to trust him, he never dismissed his words or treat him like a liability despite his 'age'.

When he trust people, he cherished them in his own ways, and that's what I find commendable.

He's ANNOYING. An asshole 75% of the time, we never got more backstory about him and Akemi because I refuse to believe this man with the personality as hard to love as the taste of blue cheese could land not 1 but 2 amazing ladies like cmon now. I hate how he treated Jodie but I have no doubt he would take a bullet for her if need be, I guess that’s why Jodie still likes him too to a degree but he didnt deserve her tbh (<- says the girl who will still reblog redstarling fanart whenever it crosses my dash).

The same can be applied to his ‘rivalry’ with Rei, it doesn't matter what his true reason was, he decided that night, when he was holding the bleeding gun of a man he failed to save, he would keep the truth away from Rei and he stick by that decision till now, Rei did everything in his power to literally hunt him down over a misunderstanding and he didn't care, come hell and high waters and he will still keep Rei away from the truth because that's what he decided to do and he keeps his promises, especially ones made to himself.

I suppose I like him because outside of 'work', while he keeps people on a distance, you don't have to second guess on where you stand, there's a sort of ease in that.

As the story progresses, we get to see reasons as to why he ended up this way and that was pretty entertaining, seeing how affectionate he can be to his siblings and what happened in his past to make him go the extreme lengths of being an agent to another country and infiltrating a deadly organization etc, it fleshes him out, it makes me excited to see where he'll end up next.

Also, he looks kinda handsome ngl

ON ANOTHER NOTE!! He's also just- Really weird??

Like ok, sure, he faked his death like one would do but he came back from the grave as a guy 5 years younger with pink hair that's taking his masters?? Hello???? Has he even been to college before like I legit wonder if he knows how hellish a masters program is AND, I know this is based on a situation that's out of his control, out of all the personalities he can embody, he chose to be a milfy malewife who's always ready to babysit others?? Dedication to the bit is unmatched.

(Also bc i hc him as conans dad and made a whole series about it, thats fun!)

(Anyway if youre in the gc dont u dare call me a simp i am not . )

#asks #dont u dare call me the s word...

9 notes · View notes

vashtijoy · 1 year

Note

i have a translation question ive been wondering abt (sorry if you've answered this before, I tried looking but couldn't find if you've mentioned it).

So Sae's conversation with the SIU director on 6/5 after madarame's change of heart has her asking to investigate the psychotic breakdown/mental shutdown cases, specifically saying "we need to find a correlation among the incidents these past two, three years." This struck me as odd because as of 6/5 hasn't it only barely been about 2 years? I know Akechi has only been working for shido around two years at this point which is when he first induced psychotic breakdowns to prove his worth to shido, and then Wakaba is noted to have been around when the mental shutdowns started happening on 8/21, so it seems odd to me that sae who is usually pretty precise with her knowledge on the case would suddenly give a range that doesn't seem to be accurate, implying the cases have been going on longer than they have.

I'm wondering if something got lost in translation, or if perhaps I'm looking too deep into it and this line is alluding to metaverse incidents that happened before akechi met with shido (like the stuff that happened with maruki, or maybe even akechi figuring out his own powers himself before turning to shido, idk)

thank you, you usually give really great in-depth analysis on this stuff and I've loved reading your meta so this is just one thing I thought to ask haha

Hello, anon, and thank you! I have not answered this before and I'm delighted to look at it.

Here's Sae in the SIU Bastard's office on 6/5.

Sae ここ2、3年の間に起きた事件を関連付けて、調査すべきです。 koko ni, sannen no aida ni okita jiken o kanrenzukete, chousa subeki desu We need to dig deeper and find a correlation among the incidents these past two, three years.

Literally, "the cases that took place over the last two to three years".

But what's going on here? What's the context of this scene?

on sae's case and others

6/5 is the last "real" day of the Madarame arc, the day it all wraps up. Madarame confesses; Akechi pops up in Station Square to watch (and, coincidentally of course, Kichijoji unlocks); you have a flashforward to the interrogation room where your next target is named; and Sae visits her boss, to link the psychotic breakdown cases she's been working on with the Phantom Thieves case that she has, to date, not been working on.

He is not best pleased, put it like that. Niijima is getting far too close to the truth. This will play out in later months.

One of the first things that happens in the game is that subway crash cutscene on 4/10. That's when we first see these two talk; Sae has made the connection that the "incidents" that have been going on, the scary accidents where people suddenly lose their minds, are all connected—a single case. The likelihood is that she brings Akechi in that day because he's known to have solved several of those cases.

On 5/4, at the end of the Kamoshida arc, Sae visits Leblanc, and talks about the psychotic breakdowns and the Kamoshida case: "Can a person's mental state really change so easily?" So here on 6/5, when she insists on the similarity between the psychotic breakdowns and the changes of heart, she's following a trail she's been on all along.

But of course, this is an ongoing case. Sae is likely refining and eliminating her data as she goes. It's perfectly possible she says "two or three years" because she simply hasn't narrowed her timeframe... or is it?

the news report at the start

Something else I want to quickly highlight from this scene:

When we cut to the scene, Sae and the SIU Asshole are watching a news report:

Newscaster: ...The suspect has repeatedly testified that he does not have any recollection of his actions. Newscaster: A full psychiatric evaluation will be performed to further investigate the crime's details and motives.

Note that this unfortunate suspect is not Madarame. Madarame remembers his actions. He's just confessed to them all on camera. His news report, earlier in the day, stated that "initial psych evaluations state that he is mentally sound and likely responsible for his actions".

This is a totally unrelated psychotic breakdown. This is interesting, because at the start of June, background gossip is suggesting that "those weird incidents just stopped all of a sudden". But they haven't; there's one right here.

So are they just being reported on less? Has the Madarame incident made it necessary for there to be a publicised psychotic breakdown, to remind people of the scary incidents? Don't forget, the news we see is constantly manipulated in Shido's interests.

the timing of the incidents

Anon, you summed up the timing pretty well, but to quickly go over it again—Akechi starts working for Shido some time around 2014/05/21. We don't know when he awakens, or what he initially does, though he likely has a window after the conclusion of P4AU (is that in 2012?) when it can happen—Velvet Rooms may be unconnected, but I don't think there are multiple Igors, and I can't see Igor sitting on his ass with a brand new wild card running about. So IMO Akechi must awaken after Igor is imprisoned. Don't forget he gets the app from Yaldabaoth; he—and Joker—don't spontaneously awaken. And they both awaken into the Metaverse we know—a cognitive world centred on and controlled by Yaldabaoth.

On 11/21, Akechi states that the first thing he does for Shido, the act that proves his value and that he's not insane, is to give psychotic breakdowns to a group of Shido's critics in the Diet. So Akechi must a. have Call of Chaos, and b. have used it enough to know how it works, before he approaches Shido.

Again, we don't know what this looks like. But if, say, Akechi begins causing psychotic breakdowns on his own behalf, in the spring of 2013, when he'd be fourteen-turning-fifteen-in-June, then that would give us the three years Sae mentions.

The fact that the dating is uncertain, though, IMO, suggests that Akechi's personal use was rather sporadic and not easily traced back to him. It wasn't systematic, like Shido's use of him would later be; it wasn't the wave of terror it would become.

Essentially: just as you say, Akechi exists in canon and has a life long before he arrives on Shido's doorstep. He doesn't awaken two years before canon; he awakens before that point, and contacts Shido two years before canon. He has his powers before that point.

And we just don't know what he's like then, or what he chooses to do—except that there's presumably some conflict between the sides of him represented by Robin Hood and Loki, where his worse nature wins out.

sae on 8/22

Let's take a look at that other line of Sae's you mentioned:

Sae 若葉の死は2年前⋯『あれ』が起き始めた時期とも一致する⋯ wakaba no shi wa ninenmae... "are" ga okihajimeta jikan to mo icchi suru... Wakaba's death was two years ago... That also coincides with when the incidents started occurring...

Sae does not actually say "the incidents"—a phrase that, in P5 at this point, unquestionably describes the psychotic breakdowns. She says are—"all of that". It's quoted in the textbox, to emphasise its significance. We're supposed to understand what she means from context. And what's the context?

Well, Wakaba suffers a mental shutdown. We know, and Sae suspects, that the psychotic breakdowns, the mental shutdowns, and, yes, the changes of heart, are all one big, interconnected thing. Sae could be conflating all of it here.

But the thing is, she goes on to bring the psychotic breakdowns back into the conversation:

Sae 騒がれてる『精神暴走事件』のこと⋯少し話したわよね? sawagareteru "seishin bousou jiken" no koto... sukoshi hanashita wa yo ne? Earlier, I briefly mentioned about those psychotic breakdown incidents that have alarmed the public.

So Sae wasn't talking about the psychotic breakdowns before. She's only now raising the connection. She's reminding Joker (and us) that she talked about them in an earlier scene. Her are in the line about Wakaba's death can only have been the mental shutdowns. "all of those things that are like Wakaba's death".

What does that give us? "Wakaba's death was two years before that."—note, Sae is speaking in November, in flashforward—"That coincides with the start of the mental shutdowns."

what about maruki?

Going by his journal, Maruki's activity period seems to overlap with Akechi's—no years are given, but his journal describes an almost-three-year period, culminating in January 2017—the third semester.

He doesn't use his power until August 2014, at the same time as the mental shutdowns begin. But he's making small changes to the cognition of individuals—there's no sign he causes anything like a psychotic breakdown.

conclusions??

Let's sum up:

on 8/28, Sae's "two years before" likely refers only to the mental shutdowns;

on 6/5, Sae's "two to three years" likely refers only to the psychotic breakdowns;

we don't know when Akechi awakened, or what he did, but he did less of it than he did once he was working for Shido;

... but he almost certainly did do some of it—so there will have been psychotic breakdowns before ?May 2014, that might account for the "three year" period.

#asks #persona 5 #p5 meta #sae niijima #goro akechi #wakaba isshiki #takuto maruki #fucking yaldabaoth

47 notes · View notes