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#if that's not rad I don't know what is
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Finished him! Color looks a lot different in person. My phone and the lighting washed it out some.
This is some concept art for Ghost King Father!Jason todd as he eventually appears in my fic, Imprint.
Decided to slap the Red Hood bat on his chest like a breast plate and I really like the way it looks. Still tweaking colors and making final decisions on the face, but I think I'll stay with these horns. And the crown is still undecided but this is kind of what I ended up finally thinking of. I went with green jewels to go with his eyes and Lazlo (name pending? Let me know what you think. Might run a poll soon on the Pit tiger's name).
Anyway this was a much bigger undertaking than I thought it would be when I started, but it was one hell of a stretch to get back into making art again.
(Sorry about the state of my signature, lmfao. I'm in the middle of designing one and I'm playing with ideas)
Media is basically whatever I found in the kitchen sink and then some. Anyway, it's time for a nap.
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redscarfconnoisseur · 8 months
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Funny FF14 names (part 2)
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ageofzero · 8 months
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Yuna is the antagonist of a potential Final Fantasy X-3, thank you for coming to my TED Talk
edit: okay I'll put it under a read more since it'll be a long post (but not as long as my entire conversation was), but what's promised is due.
Now that I have to make the post for real I had to do some wiki reading on what the actual Things going on in the novella were, and… well, a lot of my theorycrafting was based on incomplete and kinda inaccurate information. BUT I can’t read Japanese, the book was never released here, and I am going to go with rule of cool for a little bit of this even as I keep the stuff that sounds kinda dumb on the surface. I’ll be the first to say that Tidus exploding from a bomb he thinks is a blitzball is dumb (true), and Chuami thinking she’s Auron’s daughter is a dumb plot beat (petty), but I’m weaving this bridge and I’m not going to rewrite those. I am going to change some contexts and make them exist in a narrative that I hope is compelling. That’s my disclaimer, now I’m gonna get into it.
SO.
The scenario from the novella and audio drama is thus: Tidus died again in an accident, and Yuna brings him back. But he’s not back in the same way that the Fayth gave this dream a real living body at the end of X-2. The official term for it is “beckoned”, but I probably won’t use that to describe him based on my previous understanding. No matter if he’s beckoned or not, or whatever terminology you want to use, the thing is that Yuna summoned him back. She’s holding him to life, and he can never know. It’s been a year since the moment Tidus died, and Yuna has seemingly regressed into patterns that put her into what was once Yevon’s circle. Tidus is looking injured/weakened (“Chuami: It wasn’t just [Tidus’s] words that felt hollow. When I shook his hand, his grip felt weak and lifeless... I think he’s injured. Or maybe he’s sick or something.”), and people are looking to Yuna for help or information regarding the strange not-quite Unsent (the beckoned) that are appearing in places in Spira. Help she is not capable of giving. Wakka and Lulu are protecting her as she prays in Besaid Temple. The world is seemingly acting out, with a second shoopuf appearing in the Moonflow and its energies overflowing and drawing more illusions into reality. (“Yuna: The Moonflow energy is responding to the will of the living. It’s as if… we’re in the Farplane.”) And it’s more vivid than what the Farplane is capable of, even breaking the rules of “beckoning”. This is something new, something worse. Something worse enough to bring back Sin (which I thought was just me extrapolating a potential, but they actually mention it in the audio drama that it happens). Yuna promises the people that she will defeat Sin, but Wakka tries to keep her from being made to promise such a thing at first, which is an interesting choice (“Wakka: Yuna, let’s go back to Besaid. They’ll push this all on you… Sin is for summoners, in their minds.”).
Where does the world go in this present circumstances? Why IS Yuna seemingly content to do what chafed her in the Eternal Calm short movie and stay praying in Besaid and helping the elders who are lost now that Yevon as they knew it is in shambles? Why are Lulu and Wakka enabling and protecting her in that? Why is Tidus looking injured and weak and why is Yuna keeping him at arm’s length? Why does she tell him that she’s fallen in love with someone else?
I know the typical story beat interpretation is “Yuna told him that and pushed him away so he wouldn’t be in danger for what she needs to do, bc defeating Sin caused his death last time”. But hear me out. Yuna knows Tidus isn’t alive. She knows that revealing that information to him will cause him to disappear again. She’s actively summoning him back to life and he has no idea (but he must suspect something is wrong, even before Yuna formally pulls away from him, he’s weakening and he probably doesn’t feel right in his own skin). I posit that her maintaining Tidus’s life is what she’s really doing praying in the Besaid Temple. She doesn’t want to get involved with the Moonflow situation, the shoopuf or the overflowing energy of the Moonflow itself. She doesn’t even really act when seeing all the ghosts in the crowd, and actively stops Kurgum from acting (plausible deniability: she and everyone else decide that sending them in that moment would be the wrong call and riots would break out, but that density of ghosts means that’s a significant amount of pyreflies that could become fiends at any moment).
I posit that Yuna’s powers are working, that people close to her think her powers aren’t working (Lulu and Wakka), and she’s hiding it from everyone else. That her powers aren’t working because she’s currently using them to maintain Tidus’s existence. And this maintaining is breaking the Farplane in half, because she’s powerful but has no idea what she’s doing. (Why would she really know what she’s doing or the consequences? Who has any information of what she’s doing and what will happen if she does it?) I posit that Yuna’s love for Tidus is so strong that it corrupts her sense of right and wrong. X-2 is Yuna largely going on a personal quest, and incidentally helping people but separating herself from the title of High Summoner and doing something she wants to do. Rikku encourages her to do something for herself for a change right before she agrees and runs off to become a sphere hunter. She still saves the world, this time from an ancient danger Old Yevon buried and an Unsent is threatening to use (for love, notably), but she did it in the course of looking for Tidus. Who the Fayth return to life, who she hugs and is so so relieved to have in her arms again.
She’s not going to let him go, she couldn’t let him die again so much that she called him back to life.
(side note: I never truly knew how this happened so I had to consult the wiki page on the novella, and I suspect what original information I was working with was misrepresented and misinterpreted. I openly admit that the wiki page doesn’t really help me fully understand what happened, aside from explaining how Tidus ended up in proximity to a bomb. My understanding from someone’s explanation was that an Unsent summoner on the island Yuna and Tidus got washed up on after a storm told her she could call back the dead if she wanted, as a summoner. They’re all made of pyreflies, Aeons and Fiends and People and Unsent alike, and summoners are in the business of manipulating pyreflies. Either calling them from the Fayth to form an Aeon, or Sending them to the Farplane so they do not become Fiends. A summoner with enough power could summon someone back from the dead, could they not? And this Unsent summoner knew how it worked, and told Yuna how to do it. But I don’t know how real that scene could be, or how accurate it is to what’s written in the book. It’s my rule of cool moment, though, and I worked with that as my understanding when I made this theory. We have to make our peace with that, if you’ll allow me this extrapolation of Spira’s rules and a summoner’s powers.)
(The meme is Tidus kicking a blitzball and it turned out it was a bomb and his head gets blown off, but wiki says they ended up on a vision of a Besaid from 1000 years ago, and the bomb was something neither Tidus or Yuna had seen before and to them it looked like a blitzball. So, Tidus approached what he thought was a blitzball, wondering who’s ball it was, and it exploded as he reached it. I still think that’s really dumb but I’m not editing it out bc Tidus’s death creates very interesting consequences.)
So, if Yuna is summoning Tidus back to life, and she desperately doesn’t want him to find this out so she avoids him and pushes him away through any means necessary, but he’s still weakening and fading enough to be noticeable by people… perhaps also himself… Yuna returning to Yevon in some capacity could just as likely be her looking for a means to keep feeding power to this summoning she’s doing so she doesn’t lose him. And what kind of consequences does it have to do this? He’s being summoned, but he’s not actually an Aeon. He’s not an Unsent, he’s not just being beckoned. He wasn’t even real, he was a dream in a summon held together by the raw power of Yu Yevon turning into Sin. The Moonflow overflowing and seeing a long-dead shoopuf is the least of the consequences. The Farplane is delicate, it requires careful maintenance, and here Yuna is shoving her foot in the door and holding it open for a solid year! And no one knows she’s doing this! Spira’s past is full of history, some of that long-buried secrets that no one was supposed to find again. Sin wasn’t supposed to be able to come back, but the ghosts aren’t staying ghosts anymore (“Lulu: I mean Sin came back, right? What’s to stop anything else from coming back?”).
Even people who only know her by reputation seem to think she’s acting strangely (“Kurgum: I thought Lady Yuna was… a righteous person.”), because something is wrong and no one can put their finger on what. Who would have the pieces to put any of this together, and who would even suspect Yuna in the first place? She’s actively not getting involved in politics, she’s locked herself in Besaid, she seems reluctant to answer someone she worked with and should be amicable with now (Baralai).
I think the story should follow down this path, I think it should find Yuna at the end of it, once savior and now destroyer. She’s willing to let the world rip apart in order to keep Tidus, and I think that’s a compelling premise for X-3. The past surging forward like ghosts, vengeful and lost and wanted and terrifying. Who sides with Yuna (Wakka, Lulu) and covers up the problem? Who bands together to face down the High Summoner (Tidus, Rikku)? Who doesn’t know where to place their allegiance, or who changes sides when they realize the extent of what Yuna’s hiding? What does she do when she’s faced with her friends, and the person she loves so much, telling her to stop?
There’s a line in Eternal Calm where Yaibal (named in X-2 but not in the movie itself), after asking about whether or not she’d be joining one of the factions, if she’d be making a faction of her own. And I think in this potential X-3, she’s making her own faction through the actions of becoming antagonist. She’s made Wakka cover for her, she acts in a way that make Lulu and Wakka both protect her regardless of whether or not they know what she’s doing. I think it would be so fascinating to make this a conscious decision on her part. Things have broken so utterly, and she’s desperate to hold them together, and becomes the antagonist in the process.
Squeenix would never do it, they’d never be so bold as to make Yuna the antagonist and follow through on this trajectory of her lying to people to hide that she’s the one breaking the world in half (up to returning the ghost of Sin itself to terrorize Spira). Sin isn’t the final boss in this one, it’d have to be Yuna, we have to stop her and fix what went wrong. It’s not ever gonna happen, but I still think Yuna should be the antagonist of X-3.
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optimisticapocalypse · 5 months
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Buncha Monkey Wrench
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Ah, sweet internet, we meet again.
I have stocked up on my do dahs for you.
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cnl0400 · 4 months
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Gacha games get a lot of flack for having a lot of characters that nobody gives a shit about but I think OBM would benefit for having characters that aren't related at all to the student council or the exchange student program tbh
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vynnyal · 1 year
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Y'all, how do I be normal about hollow knight.
Anyways, here's the unofficial 4th installment of that series I started a while ago where I throw together a bunch of random hk theories into one post... this time ordered to make mildly more sense!
So the context here is this:
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My friend came up with a cool oc and I was immediately obsessed with the idea. I explained everything relevant... err-- mostly relevant, anyways-- but I extrapolated on a few points here.
It got kinda bloated because I tried to tie-in some of my random tangents. The rest... are just gonna be at the end, lmao.
...
Basically, there are Gods in Hallownest. They mostly fall under the category of "Higher Beings", though not all Higher Beings are gods.
All of these gods are Gods specifically because they use dreams as their life force, which is directly tied to how powerful their influence can be.
The mother of Greenpath, Unn, is the epitome of a good-ol' classic Hollowknight god.
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She IS Greenpath. The plantlife came from her and is likely a direct conduit of her power (greenpath lore tablet). The Mosskin Tribe themselves are her dream-children-- they either literally spawned from her or were merely formed in her image.
And now remember, the entirety of greenpath and queen's gardens were her domain. That's like 1/6th of Hallownest.
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She was The Shit. And then, for reasons untold, she went to sleep. Though it's hard to pin down when it started, it's implied her slumber predated the Dreamers; Quirrel's dreamnail dialogue mentions her, likely as a memory from the times he was Monomon's apprentice, and even then she was just "something revered" sleeping in the waters.
Which is to say, when Mr Columbus waltzed in to pave roads through their lands (and when his wife laid claim to a decent chunk to be her personal playground), they likely didn't meet much resistance. From Unn herself, anyways. Which makes it all the more shocking that they didn't smite her image completely when her domain was so throughly invaded and remolded to PK's satisfaction.
He had, in his grasp, an entire tribe of people that followed *a different God than himself,* aka the worst thing you can be in the eyes of another God. People are dreams, and dreams are power. More worshippers= more power. If you're a God, you HAVE to actively be thought about by many people to survive. A forgotten God is a dead God. (This exact conflict was, in no small part, the beginning of the series of dominoes that led to Hallownest's downfall, albiet with a different God.)
That Unn herself was left relatively alone, despite this, is likely because Unn/the Mosskin Tribe gave juuust enough to avoid conflict while also keeping their "dream" distinct from PK's (meaning: continue to worship Unn and not PK). I can only imagine he allowed this because if he didn't, both Unn and her people would simply cease to be; the Mosskin needed Unn, and Unn needed them. That, and he was probably pretty busy dealing with the aforementioned other God that was... decidedly less submissive.
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Either way, WL took Unn's land and pushed out her followers, inadvertently (or possibly purposefully) greatly diminishing Unn's power and influence. (It's possible this was the event that knocked her out, and she was merely too weak to oppose two entire Higher Beings to begin with.)
The other important character of note is Fierce Dryya. She was one of the Five Great Knights, and WL's personal guard.
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After WL birthed and subsequently killed her children, she isolated herself in the depths of her Gardens, presumably "well-protected" from the fate the rest of the world faced.
There, Dryya held her last stand before a swarm of infected mantis Traitors who sought to remove WL from their territory. Sadly, WL doesn't even know she's dead, even though you have to step over her corpse to enter WL's cocoon.
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It's hard to think about, but theres an equal chance that she fought off the Traitors for good... and that her death was entirely in vain. She is found next to the mound of Traitor corpses she undoubtly killed, but in the end, she died as well.
Implying that, before breathing her last, she managed to terrify them enough to never come back..
Or that she was just eventually worn down and killed, and the Traitors simply gave up when they couldn't get through WL's own protection.
....Which is to say the time between Dryya's death and events of the game is almost completely unknown!
...
Things I just couldn't fit in:
1, The name greenpath is just because PK put a bunch of roads in it, really. It likely had a different name before Mr Columbus came along.
2, Btw I wondered if there were any actual children in hk. Turns out, yeah, most bugs can propogate (lol), but the only ones referenced in the game that are not directly from a God are openly NOT worshiping ANY God. I'm talking the Mantis tribe, the Spider tribe, the Flukes, the mushroom clan, and weirdly enough, a specific spirit called Joni whose whole thing was being a heretic-- aka not only Not a worshiper of PK, but actively outcast and perhaps outlawed by PK's people.
*I'm disregarding Millybug. They're implied to be childish, but that's all we know.
Other notable characters that were at least a child at one point are Hornet, who was the child of Herrah and PK, and the Vessels, the product of the WL and PK. Grimmchild doesn't count as its not an actual bug, but a vessel created by the Nightmare Heart. The PK's Vessels are unique because they were originally independent, living creatures.
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3, This talk about gods and such made me think about what happens after the game. Unn isn't dead, just actively dying because Miss Rad keeps stealing all her followers. She barely has enough energy to be like "hey kid, take this thing and remember me plz."
With both Miss Rad and PK gone, there's nothing stopping Unn's revival. Like, imagine Hallownest getting repopulated by the remaining tribes, returned to their natural glory. The only place left untouched being the city and the abyss-- forever monument to the horrors that nearly killed them all.
4, It just occurred to me that most of the real Godly gods in the game get cop-outs in the pantheons so you can't fight them. White lady just kinda peaced out, Unn's on the respirator, PK is fully snapped out of existence, the Lifeblood entity is chilling out in the basement, and... well I guess you are the void king by then so it's a bit of a moot point. NKG, THK, and Miss Rad are the only ones that're ready to throw down. Good for them!
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5, The story of Isma is perplexing. It's implied the grove she died in is the source of the weird acid ravaging Hallownest, though it's unknown how or why. The wiki presumes this only affects the lower regions of the world, but I personally haven't found whatever supports this*. There's pipework lining the broken elevator pass between Ogrim and the Grove, of which is literally glowing with acid, so...
*there is one spirit in the Spirit Glade that mentions acid as a biological defense mechanism, so acid does exist in some capacity outside of this weird angry stuff.
Besides that, her dreamnail dialogue is "there's no time." Seriously? That's the most cliffhanger-y quote of the bunch, I can so clearly imagine team cherry being like "have fun! No we will not elaborate lol" before they spike the ball into our court.
In any case, while down this rabbit hole I have come to terms with the fact that Ogrim is still the best character in the game. He's literally the "I lie to myself :)" guy. All his friends are dead or missing. His lover drowned in 10 feet of acid. His idol the King was sent to superhell. Everyone else is a shambling husk. But he's still out here like "hey again, I realized you're not dead! Sorry about that, everyone else is so I got confused. Oh you saw my gf after pulling the lever that lowers the 10 feet of acid in her grove? Yeah she's super cool. Yeah no I can't go see her even though she's literally right over there, I got my, uh... oath. Haha. Good luck!"
6, While reading about Essence, it occurred to me that when you dreamnail a spirit, you don't actually kill them. You merely collect them. When the seer speaks to you about how much essence you have, she mentions she sees memories peering back at her. (1200 essence dialogue)
Most clearly don't want to be collected. They are at their final resting place, and desire to stay there, whether they're aware of their current state or not.
...buuut technically, TECHNICALLY, you aren't actually harming the spirits you dreamnail and can totally collect em' all to chill with you instead of lingering, listlessly, forever. You're just kinda rude for it. Also, none of the other spirits can tell what happened to them, so just dreamnail Revek too! He'll be fiiiine. :D right?
7, What really messes with my understanding of the timeline is WL's whole physical situation with what the blindness and such. She's the Higher Being, but within such a relatively short span of time, she has aged to the point of her body breaking down? More importantly, she's not immortal?? There are no mentions of the queen ever having any physical ailments, publically or privately, until you see it for yourself. Meaning that the worst of it happened after the Vessels were born and THK began their training. Perhaps the matter with the Vessels took more of a physical toll than originally assumed?
If we're assuming the pair hooked up after PK turned tiny, then you have to wonder just how old she was at the time. Judging by the rate at which she's aging now, she was likely pretty young. Frankly, I doubt it'd change much either way. She'd have that matter-of-fact, gung-ho demeanor at any age.
This is also why I specified that not all Higher Beings are bona-fide Gods. WL doesn't need the dreams of others, and judging by the weaver's seal she uses to protect her mind, doesn't want others to dream of her. And yet the Godseeker recognizes her as... something. (Third encounter)
So at least she's not just a really old tree. But she's also not a God like PK. She's a weird, third thing.
8, but I'm not letting go of her weird orb cocoon thing. What's that about?? What is it made of? Was it constructed by others and she was sealed within? Or did she somehow create it herself? The architecture seems to imply it's inorganic, but how did she get in there, then?
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To top off the weirdness, there's the conveniently ghost-sized hole in the center of her carved face. So I'm leaning more towards "exaggerated metaphor for entering WL's mind" or "easy-to-read entry point for players to go to visit WL that isn't literally there in canon" and not "there's a big glowing hole in this literal rock that inexplicably leads to a tunnel* that then leads to a room very obviously bigger than what's seen from the outside."
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There's no way, dude.
I'm leaning more towards there being a large structure she could walk into, that was then barricaded to fully seal her within. The knight, being so small, managed to get their way in through some sort of tunnel.
But then something happened to the plan and the outside of the structure turned into whatever Ari thought that orb was supposed to be.
*Although, I do like the interpretation that the tunnel is actually Ghost slowly making their way through her roots to meet her.
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tin-can-iron-man · 8 months
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I just. I love my dad so much guys
#MAN OF ALL TIME he's so fuckin rad#he came over to help me set up my desktop (got a pc btw) and funniest man in existence here he touched my desk saw it wobble and went ''NO'#came back with his tools and an office chair for me because he saw the chair I was gonna use and went :/#this man brought over an ENTIRE TOOLBOX just for me because I cannot for the life of me find where the old one went and just. fixed the des#that I had been struggling with for about eight months at this point. in like twenty minutes. and then set up my desktop for me#he also brought over a webcam and microphone without any sort of promoting just because he knows I do discord calls with my friends and gf#also I dug out the instructions for the desk and before I could even hand him the paper he was like ''so this is how we fix this''#and then fixed it and was like ''yeah you did that wrong but you were close''#and then was like ''dont buy furniture and stuff without letting me know first what you want I'll keep an eye out''#and I was laughing being like ''I didn't want to come to you every time I need something because I want you to see me as independent''#and he went ''you live by yourself of course I see you as independent'' and my bitches the way I almost cried right there#just. idk something something the way my families love languages have always been acts of service and gift giving#and my dad insisting I should rely on him more and giving me stuff I wanted but don't have without EVER TELLING HIM I wanted said things#just. my dad is so cool guys#sorry I saw my computer set up vibing on my desk and got completely overwhelmed#ignore me#not marvel related
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pulpitude · 7 months
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hey all uh quick question why the FUCK did no one tell me you HAD TO PAY DIAMONDS AGAIN FOR THE HONEYMOON FLOWER IN ES IF YOU PICK A DIFFERENT HAIR FOR YOUR MC????? i first played it w the curly haired mc and now i'm replaying it and i gave her the blonde hair (don't mind me trying to turn all my mcs into gals, i'm a gal myself and i want gal characters - in general alt characters that aren't goth or punk because they aren't the only two alternative styles that exist please pb get it together the only time i remember a different alt style mentioned is hayden's premium harajuku date scene in pm2 and even then it's still a dark spiky style) and then i got to the wedding episode AND WHEN I TELL YOU THE FEAR WHEN I SAW THE APPARENTLY UNPAID 30 DIAMONDS POP UP??????????? WHAT
also a heads up there is unprompted ranting about michelle in the tags. i love the woman and you'll definitely more than possibly be seeing me simp for her a LOT more.
yes i switch topics every 2 seconds
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erradox · 4 months
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Mindset work 😌 Song: Youtube | Spotify
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miabrown007 · 1 year
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girl who sucks at making OCs needs to make a DnD character send help
#I did make one who was rad but then got vetod by the DM and now I handed in a half-elf wizard but she's just so basic#she literally has no personality send help#and also idk what direction should we take because I have no idea what the other people will be like in the party#and I'm the only girl player there so I don't want for that to be like be a thing and bring a stereotipically girly character#and I could make her like a standard bookish wizard which obviously stands very close to me and would be super easy to play#but that's so cliche and I don't want to be like everyone's mom in game if everyone else is just running around and fucking shit up#but I know that I'll have a harder time playing a more reckless and careless character and if there isn't going to be someone#thinking for the team and we just go headfirst into stuff that also sucks.#and like I like to be someone who thinks about the solutions it just can't just be me being the party pooper if you get me#but poor wizard girl is just so mid with her 'my parents wanted me to be an X wizard but I'm gonna be an Y wizard instead' backstory#like wow such rebellion you're gonna show them girl#but at this point I'm a week behind schedule so I need to have a character like for yesterday#and I don't want to just copy others' dnd characters from D20 but they have like a group cohesion and individual arcs and that's so cool#and I suck at making up little men#miaing#mia's dnd adventures#I'm stressing so much over just making a character and meeting strangers bringing a character with anxiety disorder wouldn't even be rp#I guess great that my sorcerer got vetoed how would I play out being the face of the party
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sirenium · 1 year
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⚠️trigger warning, violence mention⚠️
Thinking about the time I had an exclusionist reblog my post to tell me that queer people are dying, and then they proceeded to yell at me for being an mspec lesbian. 💀
They were unwittingly admitting that there are more important issues than somebody's identity, while trying to invalidate my identity lmfao. I suppose they thought it was some huge ‘gotcha’ moment, cuz ooh I'm so selfish for expressing my distress toward mspec lesbians such as myself being crucified for calling themselves lesbians, while people are facing REAL issues! Give me a break.
I know queer people face acts of violence, and mspec les/gays saying ‘hey guys, we'd like to be allowed labels and spaces too’ isn't in any way invalidating that. Exclusionists need to get over themselves.
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TRAs block us because we're too powerful for them
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sketch-guardian · 13 days
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I hadn’t seen that you had replied so sorry!!! AND DAMN YOU LOOK SO SLAYY SO HAPPY YOU GOT A GOOD GRADE
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Don't worry, that's absolutely no problem at all☺
Thank you so much for the compliment💜I'm quite insecure about my appearance🙈so I'm glad to know that the suit made me look a bit prettier✨
Again, thank you for congratulating me on my grade🎉I'm happy I'm finally freer, for the time being at least💖
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licorishh · 1 year
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Most people really don't seem to understand that friendship is a two-way street.
They expect you to wait on them hand and foot as they rant about and constantly pour on you either their issues or their passions and when you finally have something you'd like to talk about you get a "Man that sucks :/" or a "Cool" in return.
Find somebody who doesn't do that. Then you'll have your best friend.
#i know i ramble sometimes and i'm extremely grateful that my best friend puts up with it :')#but see then in return i do the same for her because it would be completely unfair for me to expect her to act like a wall for me to talk a#or when i wanna show her something and i can tell she's being polite and it doesn't personally strike her fancy I MOVE ON#and she does the same for me and we have way frickin better communication and we have a frickin rad friendship#it's give and take#and also can we bring back the idea of being able to work through some things on your own?#like i am ALL FOR having a support system that can encourage you when things go wrong but some things can be solved on your own#i shouldn't be bearing the burden of figuring out your life for you you know?#i'm absolutely willing to help but if you're just going to spend all your time complaining to me and never ever take my advice#then there comes a point at which i'm literally just acting as your therapist and that's not how friendships are supposed to work#i've become kind of the designated therapist in a lot of friendships throughout my life#and it is exhausting constantly being complained at (sometimes over very minor things)#only to have that person or people COMPLETELY ignore your advice every single time you try to give it#that's not friendship my dude that's using me because you just want someone to complain to#like i said. support system good. treating your friend like an emotional punching bag to let out your problems 24/7 very very bad.#like when i was feeling completely unlike myself and irritated and frustrated for three dang years straight#i didn't really talk about it much because i knew it wasn't the kind of thing advice was going to fix#so i wasn't in the discord servers every two seconds “MAN I REALLY JUST DON'T FEEL GOOD :///”#because when other people do this to me there comes a point at which i'm like “WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT IT”#like i've given you all the advice i have and you have taken absolutely none of it nor have you taken any action on your own#so now i'm just here to make you feel better about yourself and that's really not my job#emotional support is necessary. patting you on the head when you refuse to do anything to better your situation is not.#tl;dr people who refuse to do anything to better their situation other than complain to ME about it 24/7 drive me nuts#and it drives other people nuts so please don't do it to anyone#don't bottle up your emotions but also don't let them come crashing down and drown everyone you know#just because you can't be bothered to put ANY effort forth to contain them#emotional regulation is attractive~~~#society today has built such a culture of “it's not YOUR fault and if you cry about it hard enough someone will fix it for you” like no sir#sometimes it IS your fault and sometimes you DO need to take responsibility#and if it is your fault then absolutely no one but you is obligated to fix it
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seagullcharmer · 11 months
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also thinking abt the one post that's like 'how come when people talk abt time blindness they're only ever late? hurr durr why don't time blind people show up EARLY??' i hate it. i AM the sort of time blind adhd person who shows up early
#libra.txt#like yeah some of it's the anxiety#but i WILL be ready for stuff way in advance#if you've ever scheduled a voice chat with me please know that i start getting my computer ready at least twenty minutes early#like if you say 'yeah let's call at 6! :-)' at five i'll tell everyone in the house that i have a voice call please don't bother me#and have my mic ready by 5.30 and then just Wait.#unless something has come up and/or i am Inconvenienced#i'm the time blind person that assumes everything takes way longer than it actually does#(except cooking. i'm really bad at estimating cooking times)#it takes 20-30 minutes to get to most of my appts. most of my appts tell me to arrive 10-20 minutes before my actual appt time#if left to my own volition i would arrive to almost all of my appts half an hour in advance#(which works out well for my surgical oncologist bc for whatever reason he always seems to be running ahead of schedule)#(i'll have an appt for 10.30 and get there at 9.55 [check-in downstairs takes FOREVER] and he'll call me back at 10.05)#unfortunately the rad onc is the opposite. it doesn't matter what time i show up. an hour early. half hour early.#ten minutes before the scheduled time. she is only ever late.#i have waited half an hour in the waiting room and then an hour IN the appt room before seeing her. i know she's very busy but. um. please#anyway. yeah a lot of us with adhd run late (my irl friends are almost always late)#but some of us DO show up early to things#i have shown up to appts two hours early on accident#i can be ready to go in ten minutes flat#(which gets frustrating bc my parents will tell me to get up early and then i sit around for half an hour waiting for them to get ready.#that's a half hour i could have been asleep)#perhaps this makes me sound selfish and lazy. alas. i have chronic insomnia and chronic fatigue. i love to sleep.#would love to wake up well rested one day#libra's oversharing again#< should probably be a main tag at this point
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redscarfconnoisseur · 7 months
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This loveable himbo winks with the wrong eye!
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