#if you are disabled a cane user a wheelchair user anyone who might have a valid opinion on this

[the-woild-is-y-erster]

oh ye children of lands that probably know more about this than i do

i humbly ask your opinion

so ive talked before abt how bad my knees are, right?

so i finally went to the doctor, he was really nice, said something something something its a problem with my plica, which are little folds in the lining of my knee left over from growing as a kid. and theres no treatment except for a really invasive and potentially useless surgery.

but!

that doesnt stop me from being in near-constant pain!!!!!

and i have a velcro knee "brace" thing, but mostly what it does is make my knee sweaty and sometimes hurt more. and also both of my knees hurt, and i only got one brace.

all this to say, i'm going antiquing with my brother this weekend, and i know for a fact that a few of the antique stores we're plannin on goin to have one of those like buckets of just. antique canes.

do you see where i am going.

i have this thing in my head. that tells me that a cane might help. but then it tells me that it would make me look like im faking it to get a cool cane. (which the looking cool thing would only be a bonus tbh)

so i humbly ask of ye, oh cane users and really bad leg pain havers, what do i do? do i ignore my pain, potentially to the detriment of my knee lining, or do i get a cane and look like i'm faking?

[rainofaugustsith]

July is disability pride month! In honor of this, as a proud disabled person, the top 10 things I've heard/read about disability that just need to be addressed.

"Disability payments" = SSI.

Nope. There are a number of programs which are "disability payments." There are programs that look at your income in addition to disability status, such as SSI and VA pensions. There are programs that look at your disability status and work credits, like SSDI. There are also programs that look at disability and if it's service connected to your military status, like VA disability. There are people who have disability through their former employer. All of these provide a monthly payment to people who are disabled and cannot work. 2. Disabled people can't get married.

Okay, this one is complicated. There is to my knowledge no law on the books anywhere in the United States that prohibits a consenting disabled adult from marrying another consenting adult, disabled or not. If you are on disability with a program like SSDI they could care less if you get married or divorced.

The trick here is that if you are receiving disability under a program that considers income, like SSI, if you get married it's more than likely that you will go above the maximum income threshold and lose your benefits entirely. They somehow assume that you both can survive on your spouse's income alone. This also means the disabled person essentially loses all their financial independence. The maximum income threshold for SSI is to my knowledge far lower than almost any other program, so there's very little wiggle room here.

So a disabled person on SSI has to choose between getting married and losing all their income, or maintaining some financial independence with their own income - and that's really not a fair choice at all 3. I saw that wheelchair user stand up! Scammer.

Nope. A lot of people who use wheelchairs and other mobility devices are ambulatory. They may have pain or orthopedic issues, they may have a condition causing extreme fatigue or dizziness that makes them a fall risk, they may have a heart issue, they may be able to do some walking and standing but not a lot. Some people need mobility devices only when they are doing something particularly strenuous that would involve a lot of walking and standing - for example going through an airport or visiting a museum or theme park.

Bottom line, if you see someone using a wheelchair, a scooter, a walker, a cane, whatever, don't be an asshole to them, and don't ask them to explain their medical history to you. 4. That person has a placard and is using the parking space close to the building, but they can walk!! Scammer.

Nope. Again, you have no idea what that person's condition might be. They could have a cardiac or respiratory condition, they could have rheumatoid arthritis or an issue with their feet or knees, you have no bloody idea, so mind your business. 5. That person wouldn't be disabled if they'd meditate/take this supplement/pray/think positive! Why were they offended when I told them so?

Because their treatment is not your concern? Because although you did a lot of studying on Tik Tok University, maybe they're trusting the trained medical professionals who are treating them? Maybe because what you are saying has no actual basis in mainstream peer reviewed science? It's gross to try to give a disabled or chronically ill person unsolicited treatment or religious advice. 6. I asked that disabled person what was wrong with them and they got mad! Why?

Random strangers you meet are not required to give you detailed descriptions of their medical conditions. Also, asking anyone what is WRONG with them is so damned rude. 7. Ugh, the pandemic is over but that person is still wearing a mask! ROFL.

Yeah, there are a lot of people out there who are either immunocompromised or have another condition that makes them high risk for the numerous airborne viral illnesses still circulating, or they live with/care for someone who is, or they have another reason they're wearing a mask and they don't want to get sick. And? Mind your business. 8. Heh, that person said they were allergic to soy and I put soy milk in their coffee! They'll never know.

Congrats, you just might have killed someone or sent them to the hospital. If someone's telling you they have an allergy, please for God's sake take them seriously. If they consume or in some cases even smell or have contact with that allergen, it could absolutely kill or hospitalize them. There are also a lot of other medical reasons someone might tell you they can't have a particular food or drink - for example, some very common medications have a serious interaction with some very common fruits that could potentially cause them a tremendous amount of harm. Or they have a condition like celiac disease where eating certain things will result in pain and illness flares and serious complications for them. None of that is a joke. 9. Eyeroll this disabled person needs to get to the bathroom/another area that is only accessible by stairs and now they need me to unlock the elevator or door for them. Damned PITA.

Blame your employer or whoever owns the building for not making it accessible. Don't blame the disabled person who is asking for the same access to the facility as anyone else. Do you really think it's the highlight of anyone's day to find a locked elevator and have to search for whomever has the key, simply to go pee? 10. Eh, that person told me they can't walk up the stairs! But it's not that steep!

If a person tells you they can't walk up or down stairs, they can't walk up or down stairs. Period. Case closed. This isn't something negotiable.

[genderkoolaid]

Do you still believe HRT, which unless you have a messed up endocrine system doesn't hurt or sterilize anyone , and SRS, which often calls for reduction or addition of things and doesn't have to entail the removal of any genitals, gonads etc, are in the same vein as being trans abled, and wanting things like debilitating illness, removed limbs, and to use mobility aids etc when physically and mentally abled? /genq

It could've been a trollpost, but I saw someone posting about something that supposedly came from you about how it's the same as removing healthy gonads or to sterilize oneself intentionally to want a limb removed to disable oneself /g

Uh, yeah, at the very least I believe it doesn't make sense to support people's ability to choose one but not the other. [Also as a necessary disclaimer: I am physically disabled and I use both a cane and a wheelchair. It has had a major impact on my life. This is my opinion as a cripple who suffers on a daily basis from both my disabilities and systemic ableism.]

If you get healthy gonads or sex organs removed, you are essentially reproductively disabled. When it comes to phalloplasty, especially RFF, your arm can experience some nerve issues (which for most people is not serious, there are therapies you do to help recover) but you could, potentially, experience some kind of disability. None of this is a value statement about any kind of medical transition because disability is morally neutral. In fact for many people being reproductively disabled is an entirely positive thing! Even though for another person it could be deeply upsetting!

I've fought for a long time against TERF fearmongering about transmasculine transition, specifically HRT, and their warnings that "it will make your good pure body DISABLED!!!!!" which is both ableist and transphobic. It comes from the assumption that a disabled body is inherently lesser and tragic and a place of suffering, and that no trans person would ever take disability for the ability to experience euphoria and relieve their dysphoria. Many of us would rather be disabled and happy than abled and suffering. So why do we only get to apply this to medical transitioning for trans people?

Yes, obviously getting a limb removed or paralyzed or losing a sense is going to change how you live and you will have to deal with a lot of ableism. But it's not up to me to tell someone else that they shouldn't pursue happiness and relieve because oh no! They might be a DISABLED PERSON! The worst thing to be in the whole wide world!!!!!!!! Like disabled people already have to constantly hear "wow if I was you I'd kill myself." And while you shouldn't comment your feelings on someone else's condition unprovoked, I think it's way better to see people getting excited to live a happy and active disabled life instead of constant traumaporn. So yeah I think people should have the ability to pursue voluntary disability & I also think it would be cool to see people with BIID reclaim the label of transabled, since it was coined by a BIID activist to create a less medicalized and suffering-focused way of talking about BIID.

(Also, my stance as a mobility user has always been that the only criteria you need to fill to get a mobility aid is thinking it could help you. People already suffer unnecessarily because they are worried they aren't "disabled enough" to deserve an aid. So if someone w BIID feels better when walking with crutches I don't care! Especially if they actively fight against systemic ableism and inaccessibility! I am wayyyyy more concerned with all the buildings in my hometown with no goddamn elevator + crosswalks with no button or speaker than I am with someone using a wheelchair because it helps their dysphoria.)

[beth0ftime]

Some thoughts about cpunk and mobility aids

I recently saw this post by @satellites-halo:

I think OP brings up a very good point here: if your mobility aid is obviously dangerous you can’t bring it places you’ll need to go. That said this isn’t the end of the story.

As a practitioner of HEMA (Historical European Martial Arts; using historical weapons from Europe) there are actually a lot of writings on using things like canes and chairs for self defense/offense. For example there was a several year streak in London where walking staffs were the most deadly weapon. When these books and treatises were written they weren’t adding spikes or barbed wire to these things.

I am pretty much a full time cane user due to my hEDS and POTS. I will not use it for a little bit but I end up unstable and in pain afterwards, I mainly do this for exercise/practice. So I have been very interested in learning how to use a cane in this way, as well as seeing how other, similar, aids have been used throughout history.

While not all of these forms of fighting are useful for all mobility aid users, such as full time wheelchair users or some forearm crutch users, there’s a surprising amount of people it will work for. For example, I’m currently reading a treatise by a man who is partially blind, that is his term with modern vocabulary we would call him legally blind, and he is good enough at fighting to be considered one of the most amazing swordsman and cane fighter. (It should be noted that he did not have access to glasses and mainly navigated the world tactually)

The only real requirement is that the aid should be built from a single piece (not any of the foldable kinds) and be of sturdy materials: metal, solid wood, etc. While I recognize that this does exclude a fair few mobility aids there’s still a fair few this works for: canes, rollators (though lifting them into position for fighting might be untenable for some people), forearm crutches (if used like a Roman forearm blade, again some may not be able to do this), and even some leashes for service dogs (used as a rope dart) to name a few. There are probably more in forgetting but it’s a lot.

The key thing about all of this is that you don’t have to add scary spikes that might make the TSA balk at you, you can just use a normal looking mobility aid to do the same thing. It should also be noted that most courts consider mobility aids to be part of the person using them for the purposes of assault charges; if someone touches your mobility aid in a way you don’t like, that’s assault and you can respond in kind. That isn’t legal advice and there’s still ‘appropriate force’ president to consider but twapping someone who is grabbing at your cane, especially maliciously, isn’t out of question for a normal reaction, and being good at doing so is preferable.

Ok, cool Beth, but what do I do with this info?

There’s a little part of this post that’s me trying to get more disabled people like me into a sport I love but I can’t do so without some caveats. Not all HEMA clubs are built the same and some can be downright nasty, please look up any club you consider joining and maybe ask a physical/occupational therapist before launching into a contact sport. If it’s not in your interest then that’s also fine, there are several forums that post book recommendations for learning cane fighting or uses of a chair in WWII fighting (what rollators are great for).

If you’re a cane user, there are actually custom canes that you can order that are especially made for fighting (that aren’t objectionable enough to be confiscated by anyone who does security) but also just getting a cane made from a hardwood works. The website https://canemasters.com has a great selection and a really nice custom ordering system.

I wish I had more for other forms of mobility aids but my research is limited, if you have more sources for this stuff please comment/repost with them. If that’s not your style my dms are always open for cool fighting stuff!

Be safe and stay punk!

[ask-lullaby]

✨ASK BLOG RULES✨

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If you're here that means you've ended up on my OC, Lullaby's page for her ask blog which is currently open! So firstly, I'd like to lay out a few things for anyone who wants to ask!

✦ Firstly, this is a blog that is meant to stay relatively family friendly!! Please no questions that you wouldn't ask someone who isn't an adult. This character is a minor, and should be treated as such.

✦ Secondly, I'm one singular person running this blog! Answers might be slow at times, and I do apologize for that 😟 This blog between my fic is going to take some time, but I do hope to get content out more frequently and consistently.

✦ Thirdly! I'd also like to make some things abundantly clear to anyone who has no clue who this character is, as to not cause any confusion for those aforementioned;

• Lullaby is a character with a chronic illness as well as an ambulatory mobility aid user. This means that there are times where this character will be portrayed in a wheelchair, with a cane, or sometimes with nothing at all. Her disability does not simply go away at times that are convenient. She has, and will continue to have flare ups and medical health issues that will be discussed if or when the time comes.

As for now, I don't have many other things to discuss here. But I will update as deemed necessary. I also don't enjoy self promotion, but I highly encourage anyone new to this page and this character to read the fic I'm currently working on with her!! Thank you for reading, and have fun asking!

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[cripple-culture-is]

Hi! I hope this is okay to ask here… feel free to ignore/delete if not!

I’m wondering if chronic pain counts as a physical disability, and if those with chronic pain can take part in the cpunk movement?

I have moderate to severe pain constantly in my hands, knees, feet, and back. On rough days I use a cane to get around and on even worse days I can’t get out of bed. I /feel/ physically disabled, and I’m very drawn to the cpunk movement. I want to be a part of a movement made up of fellow disabled people standing up against ableism and banding together for survival and support!

However… I don’t want to take up space in a movement I don’t belong in. I don’t want to claim to be cpunk or physically disabled if I’m not really…

Do you have any information or advice that might help me? Thank you so much!

Hi! No worries at all!

As someone who has chronic pain, yes! While chronic pain itself doesn't often count under a disability (at least in the eyes of the ADA), the medical conditions that include chronic pain ARE often considered disabilities.

While cripple punk isn't contingent on the use of mobility aids, if you use a cane due to chronic pain, then you are definitely welcome here! My disability actually involves a lot of chronic pain (particularly of the chronic joint pain variety), so you are definitely welcome!

Anyone who disagrees can fight me because those who would fight you on if you belong are people who don't truly understand cripple punk.

The creator of the Cripple Punk movement, Tyler Trewhella was actually a cane user, and they also had fibromyalgia. So the creator of cripple punk was a cane user who had chronic pain.

Like I said, you are welcome here. And you are physically disabled under those parameters. Non-physically disabled people don't need to use mobility aids (excluding those who use crutches, canes, and wheelchairs after surgery; those people don't usually count as being PERMANENTLY physically disabled; only temporarily physically disabled)

If it makes you feel any more validated, I ALSO use a cane (full time when out in public at the moment). It's a recent development of mine, but I use a cane as well. That is due to balance issues I've been having, though it also helps my chronic pain a lot too

You are very welcome here =) <3

[cpunkwitch]

answering my questions p3

[pt: answering my questions p3]

part 1 (link), part 2 (link)

ask game 3 (link)

biggest inaccessible thing that angers you right now?

doors with round handles. fuck those door knobs im glad my bedroom door doesnt actually close so i dont have to use it.

2. something no one talks about that you wish had more discussion about how it could be more accessible?

windows. i dont ever see anyone talk about how windows (that are meant to be opened for air circulation etc) could be more accessible. the window i have i have to wrestle with in order to get it open in the summer, because of that i avoided it this summer and ended up not having ac

i get there are some windows that have the screen on the other side and the inside slides up, i prefer those, my sister has that in her room, but the locks and the act of opening the window itself is not easy or something everyone can do.

3. what are some good resources that help you out? any blogs or sites that really helped you out with a disability or gave you support?

a user on here actually suggested speech assistant to me, i dont remember who but i was able to find an aac for my phone thanks to a tumblr user. i dont really have anything else to respond with, my resources are actually kinda limited ^^;

i got my cane off amazon, thats really the only other thing i have.

4. if you have an aid, mobility or not, how did you get it and do you know any good places to get them at good prices?

unfortunately all i know is amazon because i dont have a way of using other sites. most other sites dont use stripe and paypal is a bitch to me. i know there was a post going around earlier to be put on a wait list for a free wheelchair i think? if anyone knows where that post is id like to reblog it again

best way to get things at a lower price though is if theyre used/2nd hand. theyre considered worth less than new ones as they've been used and probably worn in already, therein they arent in mint condition like newer ones, but theyre still good. i actually got my first two binders that way. (tbh i get most things that way)

i know you can find 2nd hand stuff on facebook groups/marketplace, Kijiji, ebay and similar sites but i dont fully trust most of them myself.

when it comes to aid's that are programs though, such as aac or screen readers, there are tonnes that are completely free or come with small monthly subs or in-app purchases that arent too pricey and a lot of sites and social apps have those built in now a days with stickers, emojis, gifs, text-to-speech options on devices and so on.

5. any programs you know of that are either easily accessible or make things more accessible?

aside from my answer in 4, i have asl bloom which is like duolingo for american sign language. if you wanna quickly learn some asl for free, asl bloom is great!

i mentioned i have speech assistant for an aac, i've excitedly posted a bit yesterday about using it for the first time in a classroom setting.

6. whats an aid that no one mentions being an aid? could be big or small

anything is an aid if it assists you. glasses, braces, screen readers, etc

i see plenty of people acknowledging that pictures, emojis etc are aids as well esp for the nonverbal, more so than i would see sometime in the past.

a lot of things that might not be considered socially acceptable can be aids too, plastic straws for example, esp bendy ones, but thats been talked about quite a lot since the pandemic and i hope to see that discussion continue until theyre finally brought back as the default.

things that i never-to-rarely see anyone mention as an aid of some sort though? aside from medication, creams and things for pain management, theres not much to come to mind.

7. any recent news that really pissed you off, like an accessibility being taken away?

there was something at the time of making that ask game but i no longer remember what. nothing recent that have to bring up, at least not right now.

8. any good news to share with the disabled community?

i am sorry to say i bring no news at all, good or bad, but i may have some at a later date. perhaps whenever i get that french aac update we can consider that good news

9. what are some helpful things in your town/city for cripples?

nothing special i can think of

10. what can your town/city improve on to help?

the fucking side walks

11. is there an accommodation you wish you had/could get/want more of?

if i had the money and was in a different situation, id get a shower chair, braces or compression gloves, a wheelchair etc.

typing programs like typist arent made with disabled people in mind and i wish they were, i make mistakes because im dyslexic and cant always control my stims and they score you on how many mistakes you make with no backspace option and you cant continue until you improve with the least amount to no mistakes. they should at least let you use the backspace.

i use typist for class and it pisses me off that i cant go back and fix my mistakes. not just typing either but writing classes in general that grade you on how many mistakes you make should consider and accommodate people with issues writing/typing. just giving them more time to work on an assignment is not much of an accomodation. tics, stims etc are all things that can effect a persons writing and its pretty unfair and ablest to think that everyone can just stop making mistakes with writing if they practice enough.

12. whats some discourse going around right now that you wish would stop?

non physically disabled / able bodied people claiming cripplepunk includes them. should never have been discourse to begin with the name itself should be fucking self explanatory and if you know anything about cripplepunk its that its FOR THE PHYSICALLY DISABLED

also transid/transx bullshit...

13. advice for people who are only just discovering theyre crippled?

its okay to be disabled, learning your physical limitations and general limitations with your body is actually a good thing.

youre not lazy, youre not unsightly, youre not gross, youre not creepy, youre a living being and you deserve the accessibility, accomodations and help you need or want. if youre thinking of getting assistance get it.

youre not taking anything away or hurting anything by calling yourself disabled and using aids if you think it helps you.

whatever you have hindering your physical functions does not define you nore is it the only trait about you but it is a part of you that comes with you. dont let anyone disrespect you over it, get/use what you need, its your body.

14. any questions for people who've been in the community a while?

what were things like when cripplepunk first started? how did it gain traction and popularity? how did you come across it and what was it like when you were new?

do you have any advice for people just joining cripplepunk and things to say about content creation for cpunk? is there content you wish to see more of or reoccur? what was content online like when you first joined disabled/crippled spaces?

15. ramble about your condition?

man i really need to book time with the chiropractor. my arthritis aches are in more than just my hands and wrists, i get really bad foot cramps, leg and ankle pain and i have seriously bad tension and stiffness in my neck, shoulders and back.

if i remember tomorrow i'll call them when i get home for lunch between classes. and see if i can book thursday afternoons

a lot of my condition comes from my moms side of the family, which is cool in theory, i like talking about that kinda thing, hereditary and genes n stuff interests me but because its my mom and i grew up in her shadow being referred to as her "mini me" and shit, it makes me pretty uncomfortable to know just how much like her i am and i cant get away from it. (and thats not even mentioning how uncomfortable i am being associated with one of my ab/sers(u) to such a degree)

16. rant about your environment?

i feel like thats a thing for an entire post on its own. i could rant about my home environment or my city.

17. if you have any aids, have you decorated and/or named them?

ive painted my cane and and trying to paint it again when i remember, have the time and spoons, but i havnt named it or added any attachments and i want to. suggestions are welcome!

18. tips for maintaining mobility aids of any?

as a cane user:

wash and sanitize the handle/grip and foot of your cane as frequently as you use it. especially if someone else has touched it and you've been outside with it and have allergies!

use paint sealer if you customize your cane and use masking tape on the parts of it that you arent customizing (handle, foot, joints if its foldable)

place it by the door but not next to the entrance or shoes so it doesnt get knocked over/kicked etc and so you remember to take it with you if youre an "out of sight out of mind" type of forgetful person like me.

crippled-pvp mentioned this before; place your cane under the seats/on the floor if youre in a car. its deadly otherwise.

19. anything that motivates you to leave your house even just for fresh air and a stretch?

coffee/snack runs. the garden on campus nearby. if it werent for close by things like that i'd see no point in leaving the house outside work/school. and maybe a few other things like painting in the back yard ig?

20. free space!

feel free to ask me questions, to clarify or elaborate/expand on something, my inbox is always open for a chat and anon is on for privacy of those who use side blogs or are too anxious to be off anon. anon is not on for hate/discourse.

[ID: banner reading "dni if... proship, transx/id, syscourse/discourse blog, anti-mspec lesbians/gays, anti-lesboy/turigirl more in pinned rentry. this blog is protected by the addams family, the de rolo family and co." in all black lowercase text. It has a grey cloud background. On the left is the De Rolo coat of arms with a cobweb in the top corner and symmetrically flipped on the right is the symbol of Vox Machina with the same cobweb in the bottom corner :End ID]

[cookinguptales]

I am so incredibly on deadline, but man. I cannot stop thinking about the way I cried so hard I made myself sick when DC announced the New 52 and the erasure of Oracle. She was the only one I had. The only goddamn one.

Comics had been important to me up until that point, and so had the fandom. I'd put in my time just like any other young nerd, and I loved those characters just like anyone else. And I'd put up with... god, I'd put up with a lot. The thinkpieces about how Oracle's sheer continued existence was sexist. (Because no one would let a male superhero stay "broken".) The fans telling me that a disabled superhero was outside the realm of believability, but I guess all the flying aliens were fine. The deep inaccessibility of the events themselves.

Like... I remember the first time I went to a comic book convention. It was NYCC -- a big one, though a lot less big than it's become. I was so excited to have Gail Simone sign my copy of Birds of Prey. I was even cosplaying Oracle in my wheelchair. And... she had to come out of the booth to sign it. The booth itself was completely inaccessible.

(Ah, yes, the double whammy of thick-ass carpeting and super-high tables. Tale as old as time. 🙃)

And then DC announced that Babs would no longer be disabled going forward. And when a Birds of Prey movie eventually came out, a thing that would have made me cry with happiness back when I was 10 years old and getting CT scans, 15 and going to physical therapy, 18 and just learning how to use my cane for the first time -- when that movie finally came out, Oracle, the disabled heroine who had started the team and been its leader for over a decade, had been completely excised from the plot.

Do you know what that feels like? To have the only person who looks like you removed from continuity -- and to have most people in the community you grew up in, the community you loved, act like that was a good thing? Do you know what that does to you, when you've already been internalizing messages your entire life about how no one wants to see disabled people, no one wants to hear us, no one wants to be around us, no one wants to love us?

Like... we're the possibility that keeps people up at night. But that's my life. That's always been my fucking life, and it always will be. It's not a scary what-if, it's a what-is, and I don't have the privilege to ignore the possibility of it just because it's sad and scary and unpleasant.

And people were telling me that people like me had no place in fun or in heroism or in the kind of fantasy escapism that everyone else gets every fucking day. I don't get to see people like me being strong in movies. I don't get to see people like me being protagonists. I certainly don't get to see people like me being loved. And like. God, that really fucks you up!

And then you have one fucking character, and they're not only taken away from you -- they're announced to be gone in a "phew, glad that's over!" kind of way. And everyone is so fucking glad that they get the "real" Barbara back. The strong one. The sexy one. The heroic one. The one who can walk.

Fuck the Barbara who can walk! She was strong and sexy and heroic when she used a wheelchair, and she meant everything to me because I didn't have anyone else. And when she was taken away from me, all I was left with was a fandom saying she was better this way. That no one wanted a broken cape anyway.

I'll tell you, I was right back in that booth that I couldn't enter because no one had considered that a real wheelchair user might want to be a part of things. I was right back to feeling like everyone would be happier if people like me just went away forever.

God, that fucking sucked.

I know that Barbara Gordon is more marketable when she's able-bodied. Media still doesn't really know what to do with a female character who isn't traditionally sexy. There's a reason why the only other famous wheelchair user in comics is an old-ass man. (Who gets up and walks all the time using his mind powers anyway.) And god knows that female wheelchair users rarely get to be thought of as traditionally sexy.

And like... I know. I know that no one's out here buying the doll in the wheelchair. No one's buying the action figure with wheels. I know people don't want characters like me.

Of course I know that.

But god. God, she was so important to me. Even if able-bodied people didn't get it, she was so fucking important to me. She made me feel like I could do anything. More importantly, she made me feel like it was okay when I couldn't do things. She made me feel like I could be important to people even when I couldn't do all the same things they could.

Fuck.

I do actually agree that The Killing Joke was sexist and that it never should have been canon. But I was 21 when Oracle was "fixed", and she'd been disabled since before I was born. Regardless of how it happened, it was an extremely established character trait. And there was no reason why they couldn't have just changed how she became disabled when they rebooted the universe. Why not just have her get hurt while she was saving someone? Or maybe give her some kind of congenital illness that didn't prevent her from wanting to save people?

But no! They took the worst of both worlds! They kept TKJ canon and they healed her! They just gave her PTSD over it. Fucking christ. Way to blow your cover. This was never about misogyny or the sexy victimization of female characters. This was about getting rid of the icky wheelchair and making a legacy character hot and marketable again.

Like I guess I never will be.

I still feel weird and unwanted whenever I think about it, honestly. Some of the conversations I had with other fans in that period will haunt me forever. Hell, some of the conversations I had with DC writers back then still kind of fuck me up.

When the Birds of Prey movie came out, they really talked up how diverse it was in interviews. And as a queer disabled woman, I really came to realize which diverse parts of me were still too fucking diverse. And when I read Harvey Guillén's statements about how important Blue Beetle will be, about how the script made him feel so seen, I'm happy for him. I'm happy for all the kids who will finally see faces and families and upbringings just like theirs when they watch that movie.

Because I know he's right. It's so important to see people like you. To see the possibility of a happy ending for someone like you because you've seen it modeled on the big screen in front of you.

I know he's right because I know how it felt when that was taken away, and fuck. It still hurts. I'm 32 now and it still fucking hurts. I'm shaking thinking about it, a little bit. That sounds dumb, but it's true.

When I think about how many years of my life I wasted feeling broken and useless and unlovable. When I think about how I felt ashamed to exist in public because I'd been told just how little people wanted to see me. When I think about how -- I mean, it's still a reflexive action in me. To make myself smaller, more invisible, to tell myself I can't expect people to slow down their lives to make room for a person like me. I actively work against it every day, but it's a thought process that never really goes away.

Because it didn't come from nowhere.

I don't know. I don't know. I probably am going to go see Blue Beetle. It'll be the first time I've given DC money in over ten years. But... I do want people to see people like themselves onscreen. I do want to encourage diversity. I do want to prevent anyone from feeling the way I did when they made Barbara Gordon get up and walk.

I just wish I could still feel the way I did when she didn't. Like there was the potential for something super in me, too.

Ugh. Fucking DC. I don't miss you! You still suck.

[yoikami]

Can I use a cane if i get dizzy after standing up most of the time and need to catch my breath after fast-walking short distances? I don't really need one but lately I've been relying on walls to lean on and I feel like it would benefit me, I just don't want to use one if physically disabled people will get mad at me for using something I dont 100% need. Like I can walk. Its just that a lot of the time it's kinda hard. And I have knee problems, and going up and down stairs is annoying for me. Idk if a cane would help but I think it would. (I wont be able to get one for a couple years anyway because of ablist parents but anyway)

Anyway, love you bye :)

Short answer: YES.

Long answer: People will always judge you for it, or even sometimes be curious about it. Most of the times disabled people who use canes like me will not judge you for it, on the contrary, we tend to understand struggles can be invisible. You're not taking something away from us or preventing us from navigating safely.

I hear you, parents can be disconnected from your situation. To me it sounds like you might really benefit from one! Able-bodied people often struggle seeing canes as accommodations rather than limitations. Not needing it 100% of the time is ok! A lot of wheelchair users need their chair to function yet don't use it all the time. I need my cane to walk more, to reduce pain, to avoid tripping but I can walk without it. But it would be foolish of me to push myself when I could have an aid to make it easier.

It's an aid, a tool at the end of the day 😊 You can consider yourself disabled the moment you notice struggles in your everyday life with tasks that anyone else could do without problems. Especially when it comes to navigating your space. I also believe a cane might help you walk longer, you might be able to withstand more thanks to it. Some doctors might not agree but mine enforced the use of one when I told them how it would help. A doctor could even solidify your case, sometimes parents will believe a professional more over their own child 😅 so maybe that could help?

Think about it and don't be scared to try accommodations if you think they'll help!! I can guarantee that when you don't struggle, you don't go out of your way to use a cane, it's something you have to carry around, it can be annoying to some people (I sometimes just keep it in my hand while I walk until I start feeling like I need to rely on it more). I hope you can get one soon because if you think it might help, it probably would! Take care! 🥰

[algumaideia]

The ableism in the Acotar series

I was thinking about all the problematic aspects of the Acotar books, and I realized that they are pretty ableist. I don’t know if someone have already talked about it, but just in case I’ll do it. But before I start, I need to say some things:

1. I haven’t read the series for a while, and I don’t remember some stuff. So, I might write something that is wrong.

2. I’m not disabled myself. This post is based on my research about disabilities and how disabled people are represented in the media. I have a lot of interest in the subject, and I also researched about it because I’m writing a story with several disabled characters. I also did a school project about assistive technologies.

3. English is not my mother language and I’m still learning it. There are gonna be spelling and grammar mistakes. I’m sorry about it, but it is life.

4. I haven’t read the acosf book, so maybe SJM changed the story or some character in this book and therefore my post will be incorrect.

5. Besides the fact that I consider Emerie to be disabled, I won’t talk about her in the post. Because as I said I didn’t read acosf and I think that her appearance in the acofas has the same purpose that the other female Illyrians (since Idk how to write Illyrians this will be write wrong in the entire post, I’m sorry).

6. I forget the name of some characters and I don’t want to search it, so I’ll just give them new names.

Now let’s begin.

I’ll analyze the following characters in this post: Papa Acheron, Lucien, Cassian and Ianthe, the woman from the library and the female Illyrians, the female creature from the forest, the Illyrian soldiers that came back from the war and the girl who couldn’t fly. I think I forgot someone, but patience. In the end of the post I’ll talk about disabilities, ableism and worldbuilding.

I also would like to say that almost all her characters got their disability as a punishment, and the problem with this is that it always links disability with something bad.

Papa Acheron:

As I said Papa Acheron got his disability as a punishment, since he didn’t pay his debts, some people went in this house and broke his leg. I might be wrong, but I think that it didn’t healed well and because of that he has chronic pain. So, to better analyze him I’ll compare him to two other characters with chronic pain, Kaz Brekker and Melissa, one of my main characters.

Papa Acheron became useless after he became disabled. He thought he was useless and by extension Feyre thought it too. I’m not saying that internalized ableism doesn’t exist, but the narrative never calls it out. Feyre accepts this excuse, it is kind of implied that if he weren’t disabled, he would be able to help his family and get money. Now let’s look to Kaz (I haven’t read the second book of the duology, please no spoilers). He accepts his disability, not only that but he uses his cane as one of his symbols. He goes against the idea that a disabled person is stuck with a cane or a wheelchair or whatever. He feels free with his cane. Now, this doesn’t mean that every disabled character needs to feel okay with his disability. My character, Melissa, feels a lot of anger because of her chronic pain. It hurts her, it disrupts her plans, it makes her suffer. However, it didn’t stop her to live her life and she also is not seeking anyone’s pity, which is very different from the Papa Acheron situation. Mel has friends, a social life, she studies, she will have a job, she will date, get married and have children. She doesn’t feel mad because she is disabled, she is also autistic, and she loves that part of herself. What bothers her is that her disability makes her feels a lot of pain. Papa Acheron is just someone to you feel bad and angry about. He doesn’t do anything because he is disabled and believes that this makes his useless and the narrative kind of agrees with him.

Lucien:

Lucien doesn’t have one eye, and that’s what makes him disabled. He became disabled as a punishment for falling in love with a lesser fae and not only that, but he is only without his mechanic/magic eye when he is on his worse. He was without his eye when his family was torturing and banishing him. And then when he was UTM. Again, disability being connected with bad things. Now about his mechanic eye. The first time that Feyre describes his eye she says it is creepy. Which is bad. But also, why it had to be magic and give him the ability to see spells or something like that (this was never brought back btw)? Why can’t he have a normal mechanical eye? Why he needs a mechanical eye? Why does his mechanical eye need to compensate the fact he is disabled? He is as much complete with and without his eye.

Cassin and Ianthe:

I put this two together for one reason, their disabilities were cured. I’ll talk about Cassian first. When they invaded Hybrein (I also don’t know how to write the name of the country) they hurt his wings badly. And considering that to Illyrians the wings are as much a limb as an arm or a leg, he was disabled for a while. (I’m aware that to something be considered a disability it needs to be long lasting. But I think that the fact that it was cured is ableist, if I’m not wrong the text said it was a miracle he was healed.)Then we had Cassian in the floor with his wings all damaged, suffering a lot, what a horrible scene. But don’t worry! The next time he’ll appear completely cured, because being disabled is such a horrible thing and SJM never used deus ex machina to save her characters. So, this injured made him disabled for a while, and it could be interesting. The wings are the Illyrian symbol, the symbol of their toxic masculinity and their sexism. Cassian being disabled because of his wings would make him revalue his culture and his own idea of masculinity and it would be so amazing. But he was cured. I think that this makes Cassian falls in the disabled for one day trope. Just like Ianthe. First the way she became disabled was disgusting. Feyre invading her mind was such a horrible thing to do. I’m not denying that Ianthe is a terrible person/fae but that doesn’t change the fact that it was a horrible scene. I really dislike characters with telepathic powers, because for me their powers are crossing a line. They invade and control someone’s mind. They take off the person free will. They basically turn the person in a robot. If I remember correctly when Feyre made Ianthe broke her hand it was with the purpose to make it useless. And when she appeared again in all her glory she was, surprise, surprise, cured.

The woman from the library and the female Illyrians:

I put they together because their disabilities are used for the same two purposes. The first is that they became disabled as a punishment for being female, and the second it to show how FEMINIST Rhysand is. He isn’t feminist, so all these women suffered for nothing. Again, disability being linked with bad things. The symbol of the female Illyrians suffering is they becoming disabled. NOT GOOD AT ALL. About the woman from the library, she was there to also show how good Feyre is. She is there so we can feel pity of her. She didn’t deserve it.

The female creature who couldn’t see:

My problem with her is that it is implied/said that she has better senses because she is blind. And that’s not how it works?? People just pay more attention in what they hear, touch or smell when they are blind/visually impaired.

The girl who couldn’t fly:

I'm gonna call her Anna. First Anna is like the only character who just have a disability. No trauma, no war, no punishment. She just has. Then she is a great disabled character, right? Wrong. She has inspirational porn written all over her story. She is there to make Feyre feel better about herself and make other abled people/fae feel inspired. She is there so we can say: ohhh poor thing, but at least she overcame her disability and now can fly. So ableist. Anna is also only valued after proving herself useful. That is wrong. Disabled people should be valued because they are people. They don’t need to be amazing in anything to be treated with respect.

The Illyrian soldiers:

My problem with them is how their disability is used to reinforce sexism and make Cassian and Rhysand feel bad. But what about the Illyrian soldiers? How are they feeling? It seems this is not important. They also bother me because of worldbuilding questions.

Disabilities, ableism and worldbuilding:

First, why humans and fae feel the same about disabled people? Feyre has the same opinion the IC have. And the humans and fae were separated for 500 years. This doesn’t make sense. Every court think the same thing about disabled fae? Does something change if the disabled fae is a lesser or a higher fae? It should make a difference. A real world example of how social class affects the way disabled people are treated: the first school for deaf people created only taught children of the nobles.

And why the way people look to disabled fae didn’t change after the war? What about the assistive technology? You know what, it is unrealistic the fact that we don’t have any assistive technology in this world. But this happen in the antient times, how could there be any assistive technology? First, assistive technology is everything that helps a disabled person, a cane, a screen reader, a scooter. Everything can be an assistive technology. Second, assistive technologies exist since the antiente times. One of the oldest prothesis were found in a mummy. There is a painting of Hephaestus using a wheelchair. And considering that this series happens in what was supposed to be the Middle ages, it was supposed to have assistive technologies. Wheelchairs during this time were heavy and the user couldn’t use it by himself, but they existed. There are records of a king using a wheelchair during the middle ages. And I mean with the war something was supposed to change. The first place to blind people in the France was created because 300 soldiers came back from the crusades without their eyes. It was in the century 20 that disabled people started to be more included in the society. And one of the reasons were the soldiers that came back from WW1 and WW2 disabled. Not only that but in war times the technology improves, so a lot of new assistive technologies and materials were created during this time. The first record of guide dogs comes from 1819 in school in Vienna, but it didn’t work. Only after WW1 that guide dogs appeared again. And you know with what purpose? Help veterans that were blind due to the war. Braille was a system used for the French army during battles. Louis Braille only made it simpler. The war should change something.

Why is the world ableist?  The excuse that this is an antient society doesn’t work my friend. The Egypt was a very including country. Blind people could be part of any social class. Dwarfs were part of the society since they had a dwarf god. In antient Japan blind people were expected to be independent. They could work with music, religion, telling stories etc. And the work of telling stories was very important since it made the Japanese tradition to continue. The excuse that this is an antient society is just this, an excuse. Now she could have used to say something. Leigh Bardugo used the ableism of her world to criticize the ableism of our world. I’m doing the same thing with my story. SJM made an ableist world just because.

That was my analysis. I’m sorry this was very long. I know this was a little confusing, but it was very difficult to put all the stuff that was in my mind in text. In my mind everythig made sense, but when I was writing it I realized I wasn’t following a logical argument. If that makes sense. Anyway, thank you for reading it.

If you read the books and realized I wrote something wrong, please tell me. If you are disabled and think I said something offensive, I’d love to hear you. If you are non-disabled and want to comment and give your opinion, feel free. And if you don’t want to comment, don’t do it. You can do whatever you want.

Best regards,

Me.

Ps. This is my first post in Tumblr, so I don’t know if I tagged it right, if you want to help, I would be really grateful.

[ionlytalktodogs]

Having a really hard time rn so if you'd feel comfortable may I request some of the 2AM rambles I've come to know you for? Dunno if this is inappropriate or not

So sorry it’s been like 20 hours since you sent this ask 😭 I didn’t see it bc I was ✨on a date✨ which I’ll get to in a sec

First of all, and this goes to everyone ever, send me any ask you want to. Just send it. If I think it’s rude or inappropriate I’ll just delete it. Never be scared to send me an ask I’m very open to asks

Second, I’m sorry you’re having a hard time 💞 I hope things get better. It’s not 2am but I have to get up early tomorrow so here is my midnight ramble about the last couple days.

So if anyone is not up to date on my lore I move into college in less than a week, which is WILD btw literally never thought I’d even be accepted to a college and now I’m not only accepted to my dream school but I’m moving in in less than a week? Hot damn.

So like my school has orientation but they broke up all the freshmen into groups? That are called primers? God I hope no one from my school is reading this. Anyway in my primer group is me, this kid who has 20 3DS(es?) that they’re bring to school to just…hand out to people(????), and my crush who I’m gonna refer to as this little blue diamond emoji 💠 bc it makes me think of them.

💠 and I are doing that sort of Lesbian Flirting thing where you’re both obviously interested in each other but worried that the other one is just being nice and you don’t wanna fuck it up so you’re like nooo I can’t just say how I feel bc she might just be a super nice person! We’re both constantly like “you’re so attractive I’d make out with you right now but no homo” (we are both lesbians) and it’s. But then today we agreed to be Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy for Halloween? And there’s like…nothing gayer than that so? Idk.

We went to the mall together on a Date-That-Wasn’t-Actually-a-Date-Because-We’re-Both-Into-Each-Other-But-Don’t-Want-to-Say-it-Because-What-if-She’s-Just-Being-Nice and that was cool bc…idk…I worry a lot about how ppl view me as a wheelchair user. Like…idk! It’s just. Hard! But 💠 is also disabled and it was just cool to hang out with another disabled person. Very cool <3

We have been texting 24/7. Just texting our thoughts to each other, texting about comics we like, texting about the eternal emptiness we feel inside from having to be away from each other until we move in next week (yes we’re very melodramatic). We only live like an hour and a half away from each other so it’s not like it’s long distance by any means but we don’t have time to drive to each other before moving in bc packing and the like. Also…we literally move in in less than a week lmao it makes sense to just wait

My new wheelchair bag came today and she offered to embroider it for me and I’m like 😭 that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. I might be giving her Mercane, at least to borrow, bc she has arthritis and has been wanting to try a folding cane for a while but they’re kinda pricy

Anywayyy my friend and I made a disabilities club for the school which is wild bc we haven’t even moved in yet lol but it’s taken off a lil bit. Right now it’s only freshmen but after we move in I wanna try to have like…meet ups and stuff. Hopefully then more upperclassmen will join! Love being around disabled ppl.

Also my roommate is super cool. He dyed his hair green so we match ✌️😭 so cool. He’s giving me his old Monster High DS game 💕💞💖💗

Also my bestie and I are finally gonna get to hang out!!!! I wish we were in the same primer 😔 but it’s okay bc we’ll hang out after the orientation anyway.

I made 30 or so kandi bracelets with the name of our school and I’m just gonna…give ‘em out at orientation. Way overkill? Yes. A little weird? Indeed. Am I doing it anyway? Absolutely.

I’m also low key famous now for something kind of embarrassing but that’s a ramble for another time.

[thedreadvampy]

Hi! I have a question about disabilities. Im not sure if you are the right person to ask so feel free to ignore this if it is rude, but you're an activist and artist and have a lot of opinions so hopefully you know more or can point me in the right direction for further investigation!

Im an architecture student and the cut outs of people i use in renders are pretty shit. Most of them don't even include children! So im starting to make my own, and I want to include disabled people since its pretty important to consider accessability early on in the design process. My question is what kind of disabled people are important to consider, and how can you visually represent them? I already have a person in a wheelchair as a catch all for mobility issues and a person with a seeing eye dog for visually impaired people, but i have the feeling that there are more things to consider and architecture forums do not have answers for this

That seems like a very cool and useful project! I don't really know much about architectural process so I'll just spit some vague thoughts out and invite people to add on.

My first thought, somewhat selfishly, is if it was me I would want to see mobility not only in terms of wheelchair users but maybe also represented by someone with a cane/crutches, just bc my experience as a mobility impaired person who doesn't use a wheelchair is that when wheelchair use is treated as the sole expression of mobility issues it can be either unhelpful or actively make places less accessible for me (eg often the only toilet accessible without stairs is designed for wheelchair users and bc of joint issues and the height of stuff like the toilet and sink that can be much harder for me to use) so it's worth bearing that in mind by mixing in several different visible manifestations of mobility issues.

Other than that I'm not sure. I think height is probably a factor (children, wheelchair users, people with dwarfism) and it might be good to have adults with dwarfism in the mix of figures? I would also maybe consider limb loss - specifically I'm thinking of amputation or low function in the arms and hands (since leg amputation/low function is probably covered by the combination of wheelchair and cane) - you could visually represent this via a one-armed figure? That's likely to inform stuff like how you place doors and handles and buttons so might be good to include.

I guess there are also potential questions around like auditory issues (although I imagine stuff around acoustics and sound design don't come up super early in the visualisation process?) and less physically visible access issues, but those probably aren't super relevant to the render figures question because from a distance they're pretty much invisible.

It isn't disability per se, but it is an access concern (albeit one that's a bit better covered than the above) but I also think it's good to consider parents, specifically

Pregnant people

Parents carrying small children

Parents with babies in buggies

Small children old enough to wander off

and maybe include some of those figures as well (which I think you mentioned, but I think it's often a very important access barrier that gets overlooked in design)

(I don't think this is super helpful, I'm afraid - it's a bit arbitrary. I'll look and see if there's anyone I could point you towards - followers feel free to chip in too?)

[winglssdemon]

It's Disability Awareness Month or for some of us it is every day as usual. So here's some friendly tips that abled people need to learn but you probably never even thought about.

- The blue or yellow lines next to accessible parking spaces (i.e. "handicap" spots) are necessary for mobility aid users (crutches, canes, wheelchairs, etc.) to get out of their cars. Some have wheelchair vans where the ramp needs to go down and that uses up the whole space. Others need to makes use they can open their door all the way and have plenty of space to move their aids in the necessary directions or hold onto an open car door. Anyone who parks in those lines, leaves carts in those lines, or leaves electric mobility carts in those lines are being ableist. Yes, even if they are disabled too. Please leave those lines free so disabled people can exist in the world.

-Are you on a walk? Is there a wheelchair user coming your way and they don't seem to be moving out of the way and/or not staying on the right side of the pavement? If you can, please allow the wheelchair user to continue as they are. More than likely, a wheelchair user will be using the safest part of the pavement for them. Things like pot holes, dips, and even rocks, stones, or gravel can all cause a wheelchair user to "trip" which leads to either faceplanting out of the wheelchair or falling backwards out of a wheelchair. You may not see it, but I promise you the wheelchair user does.

-If you see someone fall out of their wheelchair do not immediately help them by pulling them up. Yes, I know you want to help and that is really decent of you. You just need to remember to ask first since many wheelchair users have chronic pain, and others have brittle bones or loose joints. Pulling someone up may increase the harm done to their body. If you are given the OK from the disabled person to help them, then make sure you listen and do exactly what they ask for. If they say no and don't want your help, please please listen to them and don't make a big deal out of it or force the issue.

-I know you want to hold doors open and yes, that is usually a totally okay thing to do! However, it is important that you hold open the door from the outside. When you hold the door open from the inside you end up blocking the doorway. Many disabled people especially those with mobility aids will take up more room than an able bodied person. It is also VERY important that of someone already has their hand on a door and is opening it that you DO NOT take the door from them. You can very easily harm someone by ripping the door out of their hands. Also, if a disabled person says they got the door and you grab it for them anyway, don't expect a thank you. Plenty of disabled people are exhausted at abled people thinking they can't do something, so when you do it anyway and make a big deal out of needing thanks, some of us are bound to get a wee bit cranky.

Don't treat your help as "your good deed for the day" and especially DONT say it. I know it's well meaning and helping people is literally confirmed to make yourself feel better. It ends up coming across as condescending and rude. Disabled people dont exist to make abled people feel better about themselves

-So you think a disabled person is an inspiration? I know you mean well and its meant as a compliment. What a lot of people dont realize is that calling someone an inpsiration for going about their day is actually really offensive. Think about how if you did something like go to the bathroom and you came out of the stall and someone said "you're so inspiring!" and all you did was take a shit? You'd be pretty disturbed.

-Speaking of bathrooms, please remember that disabled people *need* the accessible stall. The general rule is that if it's one of two stalls, and that's your only option, then sure go ahead. However if there are multiple open stalls and one accessible stall? Please leave the accessible one free (do not accost people who you think might not be disabled for using it, invisible disabilities are a thing). Don't use the accessible stall for changing, for your shopping cart, or for anything you're physically capable of leaving outside a regular stall. And if you need to use the stall especially if its like 1 of 2, then try to use it as quickly as possible.

- Being at the height of wheelchair users. Many diagrams that were made by abled folk say you should kneel down to a wheelchair user to talk to them. MANY wheelchair users find this supremely uncomfortable and condescending. A much better idea would be to bring up a chair or go somewhere where you can sit down with them if its a long conversation. If its a short conversation or there's nowhere for you to sit, ASK if they would like you to kneel down or if you should stay standing. Also, feel free to remind wheelchair users if you need to sit. Some of us (myself especially lol) forget that people with good working legs still get tired from standing too long.

-Always ask before helping a disabled person even if they are visibly struggling. Sometimes disabled people are still learning what they can and can't do and need to try on their own first. Some may look like they're struggling but it may just be the way their body works best. It is definitely okay to ask most of the time. All you have to do is listen to the answer.

-Dont approach disabled folk at night to offer help. Dont approach a disabled person who is already being helped by the person with them. Dont ask a disabled person who drove themselves somewhere if they need help in or out of the car. This is because if they got in the car, they knew they could get themselves out of the car. And if they have a wheelchair, there are very specific ways for the wheelchair to break down and go into the car that a non wheelchair user will have NO idea how to do so.

Please don't be upset and/or cause a scene if a disabled person denied your help but allowed it from someone else. There are multiple reasons you could have been denied your chance to help. It could be that the disabled person is with their friends or family and would prefer their help. The other person could be their aide (many aides dont need to have a uniform or scrubs and are often times hired friends or family). The disabled person may not have needed help with one thing but needed help for something else. And lastly, its really up to the disabled person who they accept help from.

-If a disabled person calls you (an able bodied person) out for using an accessible parking spot, PLEASE don't fight with them. Apologize, leave the spot, and don't do it again (and don't pull back in when their back is turned!). It doesn't need to be a huge fight.

-Dont touch or move a disabled person without their permission. Touch includes things like head pats, shoulder pats, hugs, arm rubbing, etc.

Overall, respect disabled people. Ask before helping and listen to the answer even if the answer is no.

[cuttlefishkitch]

hello! i haven't talked to you before, but ron said that i could ask you for some advice on writing eds? (i'd like to know things to avoid/common things that could come up in everyday life that would be good to mention/the sort of aids and stuff they'd have maybe?/anything else you think is relevant)

Hi! Sorry this took so long, a combination of ADHD and chronic pain slowed me way the fuck down. Thank you for being patient! 

EDIT: WEIRD HEEL THINGS I FORGOT!!

So, before I get into this I should probably say I technically haven’t been diagnosed with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (EDS for anyone reading) because it’s one of those syndromes that takes forever to get diagnosed with (it took a friend of mine’s mother over 30 years to get dxed). Many doctors, and everyone I know who does have EDS agree with me that it’s probably what causes my chronic joint pain and some of my other chronic issues. But just because three separate doctors have said “Yeah Probably” doesn’t mean I’m diagnosed!! Only a geneticist can do that!! And they had two-three year waitlists BEFORE the apocalypse happened.

I am diagnosed with Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS), Small Fiber Neuropathy, and potentially misdiagnosed with Fibromyalgia (once I get properly tested for EDS I might get undiagnosed with this because I don’t have most of the main symptoms of Fibro, but I got diagnosed with it anyway because it’s what doctors misDX you with when they don’t know what’s wrong with you and don’t want to do more tests).

All that said, I’ve done a lot of research about EDS (mainly because it’s the only thing that explains all my symptoms since doctors seem incapable of doing so), and know a few people who have either confirmed or suspected EDS, so I’ll link to some stuff, talk about the symptoms that often come with EDS, explain how the symptoms I have affect me, because just because someone’s not diagnosed doesn’t mean they aren’t having symptoms, and probs elaborate a bit about writing physical disabilities and chronic pain in general because it’s super important to me! 

So RESOURCES aka how to make sure your post never sees the light of day because you’re linking things and tumblr hates it when people give other people information!!

Youtubers! If you want to know about the day to day of living with EDS or any disability or chronic illness I super suggest finding a youtuber that makes videos about their life. My EDS favorites are

Jessica Kellgren-Fozard

Annie Elainey

Amy Lee Fisher

Websites! If you’re asking random folks on tumblr I’m assuming (and hoping) you’ve already done the basic WebMD google searches and looked over the seemingly ridiculous lists of symptoms and related conditions, so here are a few websites that are made more for people than for doctors.

The Ehlers Danlos Society

OhTWIST (That’s Why I’m So Tired)

ChronicPainPartners (the fact that they have an entire section of articles called “Dealing with Doctors” should really tell you something)

Books! If you feel like doing actual reading! I suggest reading books written by people with Ehlers Danlos, to get a feel for how they portray themselves. I’m not saying steal, but it’s probably a good point of comparison to see how your portrayal feels. (haven’t actually read these b/c my ADHD doesn’t let me read)

Ria Ruse by Morgan S. Ray (a superhero book with a disabled super MC!!)

Mysteries of Maybelle by Imani Benfell (Imani is still in high school and has already written and self-published a book cause she didn’t have enough representation for herself how cool is she!!)

Bodies in Motion by Liana Brooks (tw for pregnancy problems and miscarriages in the link, because it’s a blog post talking about integrating EDS symptoms into the story without explicitly naming them as such)

OKAY, now for some rambling about EDS SYMPTOMS!!!

Ehlers Danlos is one monster of a genetic condition in complexity and variety. There are THIRTEEN different identified types of EDS, it often comes with Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) and/or POTS, and can lead to various other conditions like gastroparesis, chiari malformation, craniocervical instability, and/or bad teeth. So if you’re going to be writing a character with EDS consider what other comorbid conditions they might also have. I’m mainly going to be talking about Hypermobile EDS (hEDS) because it’s what I probably have and what I’m most familiar with. That said there is a lot of overlap in symptoms with the other varieties.

I started typing this section and realized I was going to have to break it down even more so we’re going to talk about Chronic Pain, Unstable Joints (Dislocations and Subluxations), Skin Things, Mobility Issues, and Other Weird Shit and how those things get addressed separately.

Gonna get the Other Weird Shit out of the way first. Because EDS is a malfunction of connective tissue it can fuck up all sorts of random things. For instance, I and many other people w/ hEDS have trouble swallowing. Shit gets stuck in my throat, I sometimes choke on and have to cough up food, and pills can be hard to swallow, which sucks cause I take A Lot Of Pills. If it doesn’t cause full-on gastroparesis it can cause IBS or other digestive problems b/c the digestive tract is mostly made of connective tissue. It can potentially cause heart problems even if they aren’t as big of a risk as in some other forms of EDS. Premature osteoarthritis is common because what you need is more joint pain. And Fatigue OH BOY THE FATIGUE. And of course the headaches, can’t forget those pesky migraines can we!

AND piezogenic papules!! I completely forgot!! Piezogenic papules are little white bumps that appear when you put weight on your heel. In some people they hurt, but in others they don’t. They’re technically tiny little herniations of fat peaking through the fascia in the heel. They were added as part of the diagnostic criteria for hEDS in 2017!

Now for Skin Things cause it’s not as big a thing in hEDS as it is in other forms. Basically, in a lot of forms of EDS, the skin is extra stretchy and extra delicate. It bruises and tears easily, people with the extreme versions of this can accidentally scratch something into an open wound if they aren’t careful. My skin is pretty soft and sensitive, I def have the typical velvety skin, and as is pretty par for the course of someone with hEDS my skin is a little stretchy, and sorta delicate. I’m not as tissue-papery as some people get, but I almost always have at least one mystery bruise or scrape b/c existing is hazardous. Most of scars are also pretty normal, unlike the extremely papery and atrophic scars (though I have a few tiny acne scars that are atrophic) that are common with other kinds of hEDS. Something that I DO have is Lots of Stretch Marks, all over my thighs, and even down to my calves. Which wouldn’t be abnormal, except for the fact that I’ve never been over 145 lbs and I’ve never been pregnant. Having a lot of stretch marks or striations in the skin without due cause happens because the structure of the skin isn’t as strong as it is in people with a normal amount of connective tissue.

I don’t have to worry as much about my skin but people that do are usually very careful with adhesives because they can irritate or tear the skin, which sucks when you need a lot of bandaids cause your darn skin won’t do its job.

Now on to the meatier stuff and since I’m mostly working backward let’s do Mobility Issues!! These can happen in loads of ways, but a lot of what causes these in people with EDS are the other two things I wanna talk about. Unstable joints lead to increased risk of injury when doing stuff people with fully functioning joints can do.

For context, I’m an ambulatory wheelchair user, meaning I can walk, but a lot of the time it’s better if use a chair. Mine is mostly for my POTS symptoms, but the fact that my legs aren’t also in absolute agony is a big plus. I use a custom manual wheelchair with a SmartDrive (b/c I’m very fucking fortunate and have good insurance) whenever I leave the house and have to be “walking” for more than a few minutes at a time. I can’t fully self-propel in a manual chair because it would be damaging to the joints in my arms and hands, but the smaller chair is easier to maneuver in less than accessible spaces (like almost everywhere). There was about a month-long span where I used a very cheap and very bulky electric chair while I was waiting on the ideal set up I have now. Before that, I also briefly used, and sometimes still use, an up-right posture cane.

People with EDS have widely varying mobility issues because of how uniquely it can manifest. My cane only gave me a little help with balance because if I used it in any prolonged capacity any pain it took away from my legs was relocated to my arms, and as an artist, my arms are more important to me!

If you’re going to write a character with EDS having mobility issues as a result of their EDS the best thing to do is to narrow down their specific needs. Are their knees complete and utter garbage but their shoulders and wrists strong? Maybe they can get away with using a cane. Can they not stand for longer than 5 minutes because of the vertigo from their POTS? Maybe they need a manual wheelchair. Would propelling themself damage their back and arm joints? An electric chair might be necessary! Plenty of people with EDS use all sorts of combinations of these aides to get around their life, consider how your character’s good and bad days would be. Do they have back up plans if they overestimate themselves? There can be a lot to manage, but don’t let it scare you off! Sometimes I try and make it into a resource management game (because I’m a game designer and that’s what I do), to make evaluating my energy and mobility needs more fun!

But now let's tackle some of the reasons those mobility aides might be needed. Unstable Joints.

Ever stepped wrong and rolled your ankle? It hurts for a few steps and then kinda fixes itself, or maybe it bothers you for the rest of the day and you put it up and ice it when you get home? When I was walking around outside my house that would happen AT LEAST once a month, usually more. Some times I’m sitting wrong and when I get up my knee isn’t a knee anymore and decides to just give out from under me. My knuckles are made of unruly popcorn and they Don’t Want To Stay Home!! Oh! And my shoulder is more often out a little out of its socket than it is fully in.

Unstable joints lead to Dislocations and Subluxations of varying intensity, and some people get them more frequently than others. Some can be severe enough to necessitate hospital visits and even surgery, some subluxations are so banal (like my fUCKING SHOULDER) that you just learn to live with the pain.

If a character is going to be in high action, combat-heavy scenarios, chances are they’re going to be popping out joints left and right. Hell, depending on the severity of their joint laxity they could be doing the same sitting at a desk. Again, it’s incredibly varied. I’d suggest setting some sort of baseline for yourself, of what a character’s joints can and can’t stand up to, and maybe do some research on which joints are most likely to pop out in general (hips and shoulders are big culprits being the wacky ball and socket motherfuckers they are). Then maybe have something pop out or hold up every so often when it shouldn’t cause hey! EDS is kinda just like that! Unpredictable!

Some ways people manage joint laxity is with braces, KT tape, and physical therapy. Braces come in many different forms, since I’m currently getting pretty much no treatment for my shitty joints I use mostly compression braces made for sporty people. It really is amazing how much a bit of tight fabric can do to keep my wrist in place.

More specialized braces often have solid parts to prevent the joints from hyper-extending (bending the wrong way) and causing further damage. If you ever see someone with what looks like diamond shaped rings around a bunch of their finger joints, chances are those are Ring Splints, and are there to keep the finger shaped like a finger. I want to get my hands on some and get some on my hands Very Badly, because my fingers hyper-extend SO MUCH when I type, and it makes my hand pain way way worse.

KT tape is another thing people often use. It’s stretchy tape you put on your skin and it basically functions kinda like a second ligament as well as reinforcing the joint and keeping the bones mostly where they’re supposed to be. The problem with this is a lot of people with EDS have very sensitive and fragile skin like I mentioned before, so KT tape can cause allergic reactions, chronic skin irritation, or just straight up take the skin with it when someone goes to remove it. Hence a lot of folks are really careful with it.

Physical Therapy is kinda the best (and only) treatment for joint laxity aside from Very Invasive and sometimes Highly Experimental surgery. It focuses on strengthening the muscles around the joints so they can do the work all those bone ropes made of body glue can’t. The problem is finding a physical therapist that 1) knows what EDS even is, 2) knows you have it, and 3) knows how to treat it without doing stuff that’ll Phucking Hurt You Worse!! Because exercising wrong with EDS can do Permanent Damage!!!

Again most folks use a combination of all of these things, or have next to no access to them b/c healthcare sucks.

Anyway, on to one of my favorite topics, Chronic Pain!! One of the reasons this post took me so long!!!

Chances are if your character has chronic pain as a result of their EDS there are gonna be some things they hate, including stairs, rain, thunderstorms, stairs, hills, uneven terrain, oh and did I mention stairs??? It’s going to vary person to person, but almost everyone I’ve met with pain from EDS has complained about their knees. For me the most debilitating pain is in my fingers and wrists. They’re by far my least stable joints but I use them constantly for stuff like drawing, typing, and sewing.

Because my joint pain is so wide spread, like most people’s with hEDS, it effects every single part of my day to day life. I can’t carry a heavy ceramic plate, open a bottle, or even use my computer without pain. It’s practically impossible for me to get comfortable in any position be it sitting or laying down, and as you can imagine that makes it hard to sleep a lot of the time. Moving too much hurts, but so does sitting still. I’m constantly taking braces on and off or cracking/stretching my joints so they pop back into place and hurt less.

Also being in pain makes everything else That Much Worse. I get tired way faster than I did before my pain was this bad (I had chronic pain for a while before actually realizing it wasn’t normal to not be able to walk down the block without feeling like your foot bones are trying to escape). My sensory issues and anxiety disorder are more easily aggravated because my base level of comfort is way worse. It fucks with my depression. And OH BOY does it make my ADHD worse because being in pain is fucking distracting as hell and makes it harder to make decisions and switch tasks. Also my ADHD often makes my other symptoms worse cause I forget to take my meds, don’t drink enough water, or can’t find my fucking braces because the item eating black-hole that comes with ADHD stole them. The intersection of mental and physical disabilities is probably a rant for another time though, so back to chronic pain.

Does it suck? Yes, undoubtedly. Is this incredibly debilitating? Of course it is, I spent the last several months unable to feed myself without assistance because there was a staircase between my room and the kitchen and I could only manage to climb it once a day. Is it overwhelming? Definitely, I’ve frequently broken down crying from a combination of pain and frustration because I’m having a bad day and there’s no relief to be found. Am I able to predict when it’s going to rain with uncanny accuracy because any change in barometric pressure makes me feel like every bone in my body is trying to kill it’s neighbors? You bet your fucking ass I am!! Does it sometimes make me irritable, angry, and occasionally dismissive of when abled people get cold or a temporary injury because the stuff they’re complaining about is my life every single day and all avenues of treatment and recovery I have could take years and still not entirely solve my issues? Yeah, and while I deserve a little extra patience I also have to be sure to check myself because I don’t want to turn into someone who’s nasty to be around. Do I sometimes need to sleep for 17 hours straight because it’s raining, I have migraine, and I’m in too much pain to be conscious? Yup, sometimes a few days in a row. Does living in constant pain mean I’m unable to do all the things I want to and does that sometimes make me wanna curl up in bed and never leave? Yeah, it happens.

But! And here’s the big important but, that’s not everything! I still write, draw, and talk to my friends!! It might take me a little longer but I get there. I’m still happy and excitable and make the time to write out five page long posts about EDS because it’s something I’m passionate about! My chronic pain doesn’t stop me. I refuse to let it. I never really wanted to go mountain climbing anyway, so I’m perfectly happy being able to make it up and down the six steps in my house, even if sometimes I have to sit and bump down them on my ass, or crawl up them like a cat. Chronic pain isn’t all I am. It isn’t a fate worse than death. It isn’t the only thing your character should talk about (though I do talk about my pain a lot cause I’m a complainer about almost everything). You can have your character be hindered by their pain, realistically they would be. You can have them seek comfort, support, and relief. Other characters can commiserate and be sympathetic, but it doesn’t mean their whole life is going to be one big pity party, that would be incredibly fucking boring. I know I’d be bored out of my mind.

All that said dealing with chronic pain, especially from EDS, is Complicated. Physical Therapy is the gold standard, but like I said before it can be a long and difficult process, and isn’t always accessible. Stabilization methods like I talked about before can help prevent pain, or reduce it by keeping bones mostly where they belong. Heat and cold help joints, relax muscles, and reduce inflammation but keeping them applied is rough and the relief doesn’t always last. Doctors prescribe anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, and sometimes even anti-epileptic medication to help manage pain, but everyone’s mileage with those varies. And I’m not at all qualified to talk in-depth about narcotics or other heavy duty pain-meds, but suffice to say the war on drugs fucked shit up for people that legit need that kind of help BIG TIME.

Now for my closer/bonus rant about EDS and Disability Writing in General!

Everyone always says write what you know, so if you really want to do disabled people justice, get to know disabled people! Make friends with disabled people, get involved with advocacy groups, consume content made by disabled creators both about disability and not! Disabilities are so fucking diverse, even EDS is such a complex disorder, and comes with so many potential co-morbidities, that practically everyone with it has a unique experience. There’s no way I can fully explain everything in a tumblr post. Hell, even if I could talk to you for hours probably couldn’t give you enough info to answer all your questions (especially since I’m still in diagnosis hell :,) ), so talk to a wide range of people with EDS and other disabilities!! I know it sounds like a lot of work but trust me, disabled people are some of the strongest, raddest, coolest, people you will ever meet that it won’t feel like it.

And don’t be afraid either, the fact that EDS and other disabilities are so wildly varied means that you have a little bit of wiggle room with your character’s experience. There’s so little disability rep out their I think people are WAY to scared to try their hand at writing it. So long as your character is a fully developed person in addition to being disabled, you give some logical thought as to how it would affect their life, and you don’t make their disability the butt of any joke it isn’t difficult to avoid ableist writing. PLEASE WRITE MORE DISABLED PEOPLE AND PEOPLE WITH CHRONIC PAIN/CHRONIC ILLNESS!!

Okay that’s it, again sorry it took so long for me to get back to you! My fingers were being little pests about it, and my ADHD (which is honestly more disabling than everything else a lot of the time lmao) was being an asshole! Hope this helps, and feel free to ask me more questions if you need clarification! It might take me a bit but I do love talking about this stuff.

[randomslasher]

re: the helping disabled people post, i know that sometimes even just asking to help, if it's done a certain way, can sometimes be rude or offensive. as you've mentioned before, disabled =/= helpless or incapable. it's situational. in addition, this is just a personal thought, but I depending on the situation, I feel like offering help is kind of pointing out the disability? if that makes sense? but, that's not what this is about. my question is if, say, someone with a cane has fallen and (1/2)

an able bodied person wants to help, or maybe you see someone in a wheelchair who's shopping and wants something from a higher shelf, etc. how do you ask in a way that is a) unobtrusive, b) inoffensive (i.e. doesn't imply you think they can't do it), or c) makes them feel safe enough to say no and have them no you won't be "offended" or angry by their refusal (something I've heard that some able bodied individuals have actually done, which is kind of horrifying)?

hopefully that ask wasn't intrusive or anything! I just wish to know how to politely ask someone that, and I don't really know anyone in my personal life who is physically disabled, and if they are they haven't told me. that said, if you don't wish to answer I totally understand! its not your job to educate people after all, I simply value your input! ------

Hello! I don’t find this ask intrusive; however, I also don’t think I’m in an especially good position to answer it. I’m fairly mobile, myself, only needing a cane on bad days and a scooter for especially long treks (like going through a theme park or museum), so my experience with getting through everyday tasks as a disabled individual is more related to needing help with lifting/being unable to tolerate standing and walking for long periods of time. 

What I can say is from my perspective, if I need help I will ask. I tend to plan my tasks around my abilities. So for example, if I know we need cat food or litter (both too heavy for me to lift) I’ll wait until I’ve got someone with me who can lift it, or, if no one is able to accompany me, I’ll find an employee to lift it into the cart for me. 

Part of being disabled is learning to navigate the world around us on our own, just the same as an abled person does. And while yes, quite often that presents us with extra challenges, most of the time, it’s probably safe to say we’ve taken into account things like “those groceries are too high up on the shelf” and if we haven’t, we can make the decision to ask for assistance. I think that’s a big thing--assuming that a disabled person who needs help won’t ask. I don’t know, like I said--I’m ambulatory most of the time so I can’t really answer on behalf of wheelchair users. But to me, there’s this idea that disabled people out in the world are inherently helpless, and I think that’s the really problematic issue at play here. 

Now, as for your first example--someone who falls down--that’s not something most people plan on doing, so asking “Are you okay?” and “Do you need any help?” seems like it should be a fairly standard response, whether the person who fell was disabled or not. The issue is when you start making assumptions based on disability, I think. If someone falls down, checking in on them should be expected, no matter whether they are disabled or not. The factor that spurs you into action should be “that person fell down and might be hurt,” not “that person is disabled.” 

But as for the rest, again, I’m not a wheelchair user, so I’d say the rest of this question would be better answered by someone who is. 

[evwuniverse]

Avatar Uniqueness and Spreading Avatar Positivity

One of my favorite questions when I’m in virtual worlds is; “I love your avatar! how do I make mine like that?” the honest answer is you can’t. Every avatar is unique to each individuals style everyone in that virtual world is a human being on the other end of the computer screen. Sometimes I think we tend to forget that when we’re in the zone while playing our video games or interacting in virtual world environments. It’s easy to lose a sense of reality. In today’s post I’m going to be discussing avatar uniqueness and avatar positivity (this covers body positivity, unique styles, etc.). 

“I think of avatars like a blank canvas ready to be created from the bottom up. A blank slate you could say where your imagination creates your human extension in the virtual world.“

Because of this every avatar will look different and will be unique to that individual. Just like reality we all have different styles and some avatars can pull off what others just can’t. For example, I’ve tried for years to pull off the kawaii/cutesy styled avatars. But the thing is it’s just not me and people can see this after chatting with you or they just can tell automatically. Don’t be afraid to be yourself. Everyone is  unique in their fashion sense. I’m more of the glamour, bohemian, contemporary, and pastel goth style. Me trying to recreate anything else would just not be me. 

“Avatars are virtual extensions of ourselves”

Because avatars are extensions of who we are as individuals they’re just a shell in a world that isn’t our reality. In virtual worlds it isn’t always about the look of your avatar most of it is based off of your personality. The more positive you are the more open people will be at communicating with you. The more negative you are in your mindset the more you’ll probably struggle with your online life. The negative mindsets of others is normally where you’ll run into the “fun world” of drama in these virtual settings. Don’t be that person. 

Avatars come in all shapes and sizes and each on is beautiful. I found an avatar the other night on IMVU with the longest legs I’ve ever seen and the smallest head known to man. But to be honest it was unique in fact it was so unique that the user pulled it off. The avatar was gorgeous. Sometimes avatars might seem weird at first glance but the more you talk to people you find out the reasons behind their avatars. For example, this avatar had long stringy legs because in reality shes 3′9. She wanted to be taller in her virtual life so her avatar is tall. There are many different reasons as to why people make their avatars the way they do. 

“There will always be a reason behind the creation of every avatar from the ground up. From how their face and heads look to how their body is perceived by others. The impossible is possible in a virtual environment.”

Just like in the real world there are users of all skin tones and ethnicities each one beautiful in their own creations. As individuals we can learn so much from each other and for the most part drama aside everyone coexists in one gigantic platform regardless of their looks. Many might ask how they can get their avatars to look like someone else’s. Though we can share some of the products we have none of us want to walk around with a clone. A lot of work goes into the creation of avatars you can tell how long a person spends on their avatar. An example of this is all of my avatars take about an hour or more to create and I normally start from square one. 

With more and more users creating items for the shops in each virtual world platform by making meshes, clothes, textures, rooms, buildings, etc. Everything nowadays is made for users by users. Yes, the virtual world companies might release some of their own items. However, for the most part it’s made by the community individuals just like you and me. Anyone can learn how to do this the question is will you put in the effort to do so? Because of this different skin types such as avatars with vitiligo are stepping up and showing their beauty. Virtual platforms are bringing awareness to disabilities as well with wheelchairs created specifically for your avatars, canes, and other items. Show off your virtual beauty because you are in fact beautiful. 

Stay beautiful and always be confident in the way that you live your virtual life with your avatar. Show your uniqueness to the world and don’t ever let anyone put you down for how your avatar looks. 

Until next time.

Ellie