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#if you buy all your clothes from the mall or online you are NOT poor
lynnuvo · 3 months
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Richy Rich Gets a Girl
(Based on the idea of Monoma Neito being from a wealthy family)
Before Dating
(Y/N), while they're shopping at the mall: This is a cute jacket. I don't have enough money on me right now, though. Monoma: If you want, I can buy it for you right now and you can pay me back later. (Y/N): Is that really okay? Monoma: Don't worry. I insist on helping the poor.
(Y/N): I'm not that poor.
While Dating
(Y/N), while they're shopping at the mall: This is a cute jacket. I don't have enough money on me right, though. Monoma, already putting it in their cart: All yours.
(Y/N): It's fine, really! I can find a jacket more in my budget.
Monoma: Too bad. Now, what else do you want?
(Y/N): I'm not telling you if you're going to be buying everything I want.
Monoma: It's either that or I buy everything your eyes linger on. It'd be better you voice which you actually want, right dear? (Y/N), looking around frantically: Jerk! And don't call me that in public! It's embarrassing...
6 Months into Dating
Monoma, while on a call with (Y/N): How is Christmas break at home going for you?
(Y/N): Great! I just finished decorating the house with my parents. After being in the dorm for so long, I missed my actual home. How about--? Monoma: Ah. It's here. I'm sorry to interrupt, love, but can you check outside your door for me? (Y/N): Uh--sure. One sec. Monoma, what is this bulky package? Did you have something delivered to my house? Monoma: I sure did. I saw some clothes online and thought you would look good in them, so I went ahead and shipped it to you. (Y/N): Monoma! Thank you, but I gave you my address to pick me up on dates, not ship me things! (Sigh) You're lucky I love you, hon.
Monoma: I love you too. I finally understand what you girls mean when you say you love dressing people up. Check outside your door again this evening. The second package should arrive then. (Y/N): Second one?! Monoma: Don't worry. This one's shoes!
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rivertigo · 4 months
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Gimme the tea on music gatekeeping OR restrictions on clothes when it comes to musically-inspired lifestyles and outfits 👀
hmm well. I think there is a lot to talk about when it comes to this and I’m assuming you’re talking about music based subcultures so that’s what I’ll be rolling with.
music based subcultures historically had a physical space: clubs, skate parks, house shows, college campuses, neighborhoods, malls, etc. Rising costs has made this almost impossible depending on where you live due to many factors. The majority of these communities developed amongst younger peoples so i’ll be talking about things that most relate to younger people.
The increase in parental anxiety over the safety of their children has made it hard for people to go to places where a music subculture would flourish regularly. In many places (mainly the US) public transport doesn’t exist in a meaningful way for people to reach farther away places, so that means you have to drive. so you have to get someone to take you and that means gas money, which is more expensive along with everything else so everyone has to work more.
you work so much to have money to scrape by so you don’t have any free time or as much extra cash to afford going to shows and support local acts. being a musician takes too much time away from work or school and when everything costs so much that is time you can’t afford to practice and play if there isn’t reasonable money in it. musicians don’t make sales in records or get local radio play (radio is a monopoly so small local stations can’t survive) anymore due to streaming so when you’re a very small act you’re making dirt.
so the subcultures are on a sort of life support, due to the poor economy. more budget friendly shows are in small amount due to more regulation around neighborhood noise rules and lack of parking (because everyone has to drive to the show) makes house venues very sparing. bars used to close and open and pop up all the time, but due to the increasing costs of running a business and laws around alcohol sales and minors, bars don’t have a lot of spare money for hiring music acts, and there aren’t as many to play in.
so this means music culture has to be online, and online there is a disconnect between aesthetics and the music because there is no real life location to experience the culture. In a goth club you dress up goth because it’s a social experience you want to participate in and you go out and listen to goth music, surrounded by people of all walks of life. An old guy in black skinny jeans and a ramones shirt can be goth because he is at a goth bar listening to goth music and participating in the subculture.
online, everything is image. It’s all about presentation and looks. you can be a poser because you aren’t going to shows. you can buy something labeled goth or punk on shein because you like the way it looks and not have to understand any history behind what participating in the subculture means. you don’t have people to learn from because you are isolated from older people who aren’t online to tell you about why buying fast fashion alternative clothing is stupid as fuck. you go on your merry way calling yourself a goth who’s favorite artist is polluter and billionaire t*ylor swift. you get people who’ve never learned a bit of history of the very real punk music subculture using the word to make posts saying ‘what punk is actually about is being soft and hugging friends’
I think the ‘problem’ of posers of subcultures is mainly from music becoming something in your phone rather than something to experience in a community 🤷 but of course this is just my opinion on rock based subcultures in mainly the United States because that’s the music I listen to and where I live so I can’t speak for literally anything else. and I’m always learning new things too so my opinions are ever changing as well
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socksareendangered · 3 months
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hello fellow Splatoon writer !!! may I request fem chubby reader x Acht from Splatoon headcanons?? Hope you are having a great day :]
🙌🙌‼️
ask and i'll do my best to receive! have yourself a blessed day 🐙
Acht x chubby fem reader
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>when acht first met you they thought you fell from heaven.. how kindly you spoke to strangers and the cute outfit you were wearing
>the next time they saw you was at a mall where acht was forced to go with marina and pearl, then a small ice cream parlor
>poor acht thought you thought that they were following you, happening to be at the same spot as you for the whole week
>how wrong acht was when you approached them, saying how you swore you saw them almost everyday
>shocking to acht you gave them your number, which soon evolving into more texting and hanging out more often
>until hard and caged feelings finally fell in the middle of a bowling alley.. it was embarrassing so we wont talk about it!
>oh but they're the best partner you could possibly ask for! accepted you for how you look and act!
>so much more kind even with the whole look they have. i mean, nobody expects a.. zombie to act so sweet
>you yourself are just as accepting as they are, people are sure to judge someone with green skin and a tall figure
>affection is only displayed at home, in private cuddled up on the couch
>acht is strong despite having a skinny build, pros of being trained for the octarian army
>sometimes they like to show off by lifting something heavy, that nobody should really be able to lift.
>shocking how strong they actually are when they never really participated in training
>acht makes sure you know they're strong by lifting heavy materials, and picking your feet off the ground, doesn't want you to doubt anything about your weight
>while it's just you two, acht loves to hold you. just never shows it, having a face that doesn't display much of anything. but you caught on that they love holding you
>hands caught in the folds of your warm stomach and head hidden in the crook of your neck. always hugging you from behind whenever they get the chance
>cooking, cleaning, in bed or on the couch. takes advantage of it when the chance is given
>speaking of cooking and food, you love to bake for acht. you take charge of filling their plate since they don't eat much
>not that acht doesn't like your cooking, just that they don't really need to eat. but little you insists anyway to cook a little extra
>acht tries to pay for anything that you haven't. they want to treat you to things as well just always seems to be busy
>but whenever acht does take you out somewhere it's always so perfect! of course it is to you, cant help but love everything they do!
>taking you down to the beach at dusk or a fancy restaurant and buying you clothes!
>if acht ever heard you being shamed for being chubby they wouldn't do anything physical to the one who offended you
>treats you first, does whatever you want them to. a bath? hot and ready all for you. food? already prepped. just want to relax and cuddle? okay then!
>makes sure you're feeling better if you were hurt before acting
>being the tech nerd they've been since birth, they deal with the offender online
>confusing how they get it done but they get it DONE!!
>doesn't threaten them or insult them, just spreads that information everywhere
>framing them and getting the internet to the job done for them. maybe throwing in some false facts to ruin their reputation and prevent them from doing whatever if they pushed limitations
>but the rest isn't acht's problem, your all that matters right now
>tucked away beneath the blankets cuddled closely together, acht's arms wrapped under your plush chest and stomach
>they really love you enough to talk so vividly and be so close to you, tentacles wrapped tightly together
>a subtle symbol of affection and love for friends and lovers to commit to
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aaeee!! i hope this meets your standards anon #1!
i've never really written for a chubby person, or written anything at all.
please ask again if you desire to do so. hope your day has treated you well.
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sweatykingdomchaos · 11 months
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What Would the World Look Like Without fake bags online?
The duplicate bag craze is very little new.​ I don't forget when I was a young teenager eager to search her very best, I assumed owning a replica bag was the ultimate fashion statement.​ I bought my pretty to start with designer replica bag from a local retailer.​ It absolutely was a traditional Gucci tote that I thought was so stylish and sophisticated.​ I recall clutching tightly on the handles and strutting down the road.​ I felt like the belle of the ball!
I've considering that realized the Idea of proudly owning a duplicate bag is a tad controversial.​ After all, the original designer commonly puts their blood, sweat and tears into each and every design, and knocks-off corporations merely go ahead and take credit score as their very own.​ Despite the fact that I bought my replica bag many years in the past, I continue to mirror fondly on the many great moments I'd with that bag.​
At the same time, I know how vital it is to shield the exertions and determination of designers, so for that purpose I don't buy duplicate bags any more.​ However, it's difficult to ignore the value tag of an unique layout, and over and over its just over and above our economic reach.​
Due to this, I feel duplicate luggage have their place in the fashion industry.​ It's correct that there are negatives to owning a replica like poor high quality and cloth, but when worn respectfully they may be extras that aid us build special and wonderful seems.​ Also, I do think It truly is possible to locate a middle floor - 1 could continue to appreciate the original designs with no purchasing knock-offs.​
Whilst I don't Individually have duplicate bags any more, I know many people who do, also to use an idiom, ‘it all will depend on the person’.​ For a few, the one distinction between an authentic and replica bag is the price tag.​ They don't care about recognition or top quality, They simply want to save lots of a couple of bucks whichever way they are able to.​
I am able to completely empathize with this standpoint.​ After all, I've been there myself, wanting to feel lovely and classy in my replica Gucci bag.​ But I also have an understanding of the important function of the designer and the necessity of safeguarding their legal rights as well as their hard work.​
I remember The 1st time I saw a fake bag.​ I had been procuring in my local shopping mall and stumbled across this amazing designer handbag.​ I had been so mesmerised by its elegance which i right away assumed it had been legitimate.​ Very little did I recognize that it was in fact a counterfeit! I can nevertheless recall the intensity of your disappointment when I discovered the truth.​
At the outset, I believed to myself, how can anyone get away with building copies of reliable designer bags? Then I realised that the demand from customers for designer goods has grown exponentially, and counterfeiters are taking advantage of this.​ Fake bags are in all places now, and It is really genuinely unfortunate to think about.​
I'm guaranteed Many people have bought a faux designer bag without the need of realising it.​ In the end, the counterfeiters have their professional contact.​ It truly is difficult to tell the distinction between a true in addition to a fake bag.​ Even professional purchasers is usually fooled.​
However, There are many notify-tale indicators like the price tag, and the caliber of the leather-based made use of, which will help establish a faux.​ If you are scared of being duped, do your investigate and Guantee that the bag you're purchasing is the true deal.​
I feel responsible recognizing that there's an market that can take advantage of folks.​ But the truth is, a lot of customers have their unique reasons for purchasing bogus baggage.​ Some people won't be able to manage originals, while some are searhing for a good offer.​
Sufficient people have been ripped off and duped by acquiring pretend luggage.​ It's best to try to avoid counterfeits completely.​ Real, They might glance seemingly genuine and experience magnificent, but which is only planning to previous for thus prolonged.​ Lower-excellent products and poor craftsmanship mean your bogus bag will not likely stand the check of your time.​
What is actually even worse is, purchasing a fake bag doesn't only gain the seller but supports a much larger, criminal underworld.​ Aside from that, providing phony products can finish you up in jail if you receive caught, so It truly is generally most effective to remain clear of fakes.​
So, when you are ever thinking of investing in a designer bag, I'd urge you to buy only from authorised dealers.​ That way, you are able to be certain It really is genuine and Safe and sound.​ Furthermore, with all the money you help save from shopping for fakes, you'll need ample to purchase an excellent initial.​ So It is often finest for being cautious in generating buys.​
I suppose I’m caught in the middle, obtaining viewed both sides with the coin.​ I might not have a designer tote any longer, but I'm able to appreciate the value, craft and high quality that went into it.​ And After i do see an individual carrying a beautiful unique piece, I'm able to’t help but admire the hassle and creativeness driving it.​
So, when it comes to duplicate baggage, what actually defines them? Is it the craftsmanship, the originality, or maybe the bit of brain that goes along with it? Or can it be simply just about the cost tag?
In the long run, I believe reproduction baggage must be regarded as vogue statements that ought to be revered and appreciated, just like the unique pieces.​ All things considered, they help us cut costs devoid of compromising our fashion in almost any way, and for that they should be regarded a valuable addition to anyone’s collection of bags.​
Using a further consider the make any difference of replica luggage, there’s considerably more to them than just knock-offs of originals.​ Some knock-off brand names became pretty Inventive, Performing tricky to develop handbags with amazing craftsmanship and cocktails of supplies that fake designer bags would not Ordinarily be found on a standard designer piece.​ They draw inspiration from the first and think of layouts which have been extremely trendy - showcasing their unique distinctive magnificence as an alternative to just copying a fashion from somewhere else.​
Increasingly more, The style sector is looking at a expansion of replicated models getting traction, as Increasingly more purchasers glance to add a singular contact to their wardrobe devoid of breaking the financial institution.​ Indeed, the knock-off industry carries its share of reduced high-quality bags, but even replica luggage appear in various grades now.​
It is real that designer originals will often continue to be originals, but the marketplace for knock-offs has grown considerably over time, offering The customer piece of head whilst continue to being able to Convey their unique design at a portion of the fee.​ Individually, I do think there’s a particular appeal to the knock-off sector that can’t be denied.​ Every person desires to shave a number of hundred of the cost of purchasing a designer bag, so it’s Secure to say that duplicate bags are going to be all around for pretty a while.​
Moreover, There are tons of various views to the make any difference.​ Some people may possibly argue that buying knock-offs supports the unethical methods of price reduction suppliers, while some could possibly propose that it encourages creativeness and really helps to convey up the normal of fashion pieces.​ Some may very well be fully indifferent to your subject, but regardless, it’s one thing really worth talking about and mulling around.​
At the conclusion of the day, Every person has their particular feeling on reproduction bags, and I’m no exception.​ Just as much as I’d prefer to try to avoid the knock-off market place, I’ll confess that there are times when I locate myself waving to get a cab by using a replica bag by my aspect.​ Little doubt it’s a personal conclusion that each of us have to make for ourselves, And that i’m sure it’s a subject that could proceed being the source of numerous debates.​
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globallyfulfill · 11 months
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Is DHgate the Unsung Hero for Clothing E-Commerce?
Founded back in 2004, DHgate has steadily risen as a third-party marketplace where you can directly connect with Chinese manufacturers and suppliers. With the rapid evolution of e-commerce and a shifting global market, there's been growing interest in platforms like these. But is DHgate safe? Should clothing e-commerce vendors be exploring it? Let’s dive in!
What Exactly Is DHgate? 🌏
DHgate is somewhat of a giant virtual mall. Much like Aliexpress, you can find a range of products from apparel and cosmetics to electronics and more. For e-commerce sellers, it's an avenue to source different products at low Minimum Order Quantities (MOQs), a boon when testing new markets.
Safety First: Is DHgate Legit? 🔍
In one word: Yes. However, as with all platforms that act as a middleman (think eBay or Alibaba), the variety of sellers means experiences can vary. DHgate has protective measures in place, such as holding payments until orders are confirmed as delivered. Yet, due diligence remains paramount to ensure a satisfactory buying experience.
Why Choose DHgate? 🛍️
1. Buyer Protection: Your safety and security are prioritized. There’s a comprehensive refund and dispute resolution process.
2. Vast Product Selection: From the latest fashion trends to essential electronics, there's a wide array to cater to diverse needs.
3. Competitive Prices: By directly linking manufacturers with buyers, the prices are often more competitive, making for some great bargains.
Addressing the Elephant in the Room: Is DHgate a Scam? 🤨
While DHgate as a platform is legit, there might be some sellers with less than stellar intentions. Here are some challenges buyers have faced:
Communication Difficulties: Sometimes a language barrier, sometimes just overwhelmed sellers.
Inconsistent Product Quality: This underlines the importance of researching sellers and checking reviews.
Delivery Delays: International shipping can be lengthy, and delays can cause suspicions.
Fraudulent Sellers: As with all online platforms, there are scammers. Fortunately, DHgate offers dispute resolution mechanisms to help in these situations.
Unraveling the Mystery: Why So Cheap? 💸
Browsing DHgate, the low prices are striking. Several reasons contribute:
No Middlemen: Most sellers are direct manufacturers.
Low Labor Costs: Production in China can be significantly cheaper.
Bulk Sales: Bulk sales often mean reduced per-item costs.
Clearance of Excess Stock: Sometimes, it’s just about moving stock out.
Tips for Safe DHgate Shopping: 🛒
Examine Seller Profiles: Look for badges and high feedback scores.
Review Vigilance: Focus on poor reviews and check for authenticity.
Start Small: Test with a small order before committing to more.
Beware of Misleading Descriptions: If it sounds too good to be true, double-check.
Stay on DHgate: Always transact within the platform to benefit from their protection policies.
In conclusion, DHgate offers a world of potential for e-commerce sellers, especially in the apparel industry. It’s all about approaching it with an informed mindset. With the right knowledge, it could very well be an e-commerce goldmine.
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nickgerlich · 11 months
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Clothes Encounters
What goes around, comes around. When I was a kid, we were still in the Spy v. Spy era, an artifact of the Cold War with the USSR. We didn’t trust them, and they didn’t trust us. You never really knew if your operatives had sold out to the other side. The story of Lee Harvey Oswald, the man who killed President Kennedy, was fresh in our minds. Prior to his misdeed, he had defected to the USSR, and then defected back to the US. If ever a person were shrouded in mystery, it was LHO.
Today, while we aren’t exactly best buddies with Russia and its President, Vladimir Putin, it seems we are more concerned with China. Our relationship with them has always been tenuous at best, and whereas not long ago we simply outsourced much of our manufacturing to them, they have now developed to the point that they are a formidable economic foe, not to mention political.
Thus, we find ourselves concerned about companies like TikTok (banned by 34 state governments), Temu and its ridiculously cheap bargains, and Shein, the fast-fashion giant. All were founded in China and maintain ties there, but all have US operations as well. I suspect those US operations are more smokescreen than anything, designed to deflect criticisms and concerns.
Shein, the e-commerce darling during COVID, is now planning an IPO for the US. But before it does so, it must try to shake a slew of allegations centered on forced labor in its supply chains, labor violations, and stealing designs from independent creators. These are the kinds of things that will find Shein appearing in case studies and text book chapters for years to come. Ethics, anyone?
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Fast fashion, by definition, is not just quick, but also cheap. Companies routinely introduce new items every week, not so much to follow a trend, but to create one instead. Items may have a shelf life of as few as six weeks. The implicit message to customers is that, if you want to stay on the bleeding edge of fashion, you have to buy in early, and be prepared to keep buying as new items come out.
What people do with those now-it’s-in-now-it’s-not clothes is up to the customer. Quality is usually suspect, given the price. And, given that the garments are designed to have such a limited run, they don’t have to hold up to dozens of washings. Thus, last month’s hot item may languish in the back of a closet, be sold or donated, or, in some cases, thrown in the dumpster because it is already falling apart.
A quick look at the Shein website as well as their Amazon store quickly reveals their target market: young and female. Yes, they have some men’s clothing, but it’s kind of like going to a Lush store in the mall. You know, the one with all those overly fragrant bath soaps and personal care items that draws in women by the score. There is a tiny men’s section with shaving butters and the like, but you have to look for it. I bet they have those for the poor guys being dragged along for a day of shopping.
Technically, Shein is a DTC (Direct-to-Consumer) firm, a purely online retailer of its own wares. It has, however, dabbled with pop-up shops in large US cities. I wouldn’t be surprised if it expands on these, just like eyeglass maker Warby Parker has done with its shops. But I have my doubts they would start distributing through other retailers, primarily because those cheap prices don’t carry very high margins to begin with. Prices would have to go up to give various channel members a piece of the action, which would then defeat Shein’s primary advantage.
But back to ethics. These allegations are huge, and China, like other Asian nations, is rumored far and wide to have some of the worst working conditions on the planet. Never mind the fact that Americans can’t just fly to Beijing, rent a car, and pay a visit to these factories.
Then there’s the issue of intellectual property. If you’re busy churning out new items on a weekly basis, there’s a need for fresh takes on style. I could see a creative team having to work 24/7 to keep up with this treadmill.
Lastly, there are lingering concerns about US data, which Shein swears is kept here under lock and key. TikTok owner Byte Dance swears the same thing, but that didn’t stop those states from banning them on government-owned devices.
It’s enough to make me compare the current situation to that of my youth. While the case against Mr. Oswald ultimately found him to be the lone assassin, there are still lingering unresolved issues even now. We may never know the details of his behaviors and actions leading up to that tragic day in Dallas.
Shein has its work cut out for them. I am pretty certain we may never truly know all the ins and outs of this firm. The opaque curtain behind which it operates shields them, but will probably also lead to investor skepticism. And that’s a style that no one looks good in.
Dr “Count Me Out” Gerlich
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lavenderbexlatte · 4 years
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a handful (or two)
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stray kids 3.9k words female reader insert Thick/Chubby!Reader x Lee Felix  EXPLICIT/NSFW
🖤 warnings: DISCUSSIONS OF WEIGHT/BODY IMAGE/INSECURITY, unprotected sex 🖤
connect with me! / masterlist
Sitting at your kitchen table in the early evening, you feel more like a soldier walking into battle than anything else.
You’ve got a list of your body measurements scrawled on a piece of paper beside you, as you scroll through an online shop on your phone. Ruffled blouses, wrap dresses, raw-hemmed jeans, tiered skirts, fitted cardigans. The clothes are cute, and your Likes list has no shortage of garments, but you’ve reached the worst part of clothes shopping:
Finding things that are actually in your size.
Korean online malls are not known for their variety of sizes, even though obviously, the people in any country who need to buy clothes have all different kinds of bodies. The cute clothes, the mainstream ones, the clothes that YouTubers and Instagram models promote, are mostly one-size. And that one size…is small.
Too small for you.
It’s a regular debate that you have with yourself. You shouldn’t even give your patronage to shops like these ones, where you have to filter through every single item and look at the detailed measurements to find the rare pair of pants that you could squeeze into. You shouldn’t play into a system that makes you hate yourself.
But you need new jeans. And in your heart, you want cute jeans from the online mall, like everyone else.
You pull up a pair of jeans in exactly the style that you want and scroll down to the measurements. You have to steel yourself as you look at the numbers.
Waist…hips…thigh…rise…length…
They’re too small.
You pull up another pair, and another, and another. They’re all too small.
“No,” says a small, dark voice in the back of your mind, “You’re just too big.”
You’re so caught up in this game of finding cute things to wear and discovering exactly how much the seller doesn’t want them to fit on people like you, that you don’t even hear your boyfriend until he’s right next to you.
“What are you doing?” comes a deep voice, right in your ear.
You jump in your seat, fumbling your phone for a second and catching it before it falls. Catching your breath, you look up at Felix, stood beside your chair gazing down at you.
“Jesus, when did you get here?” you ask, putting your phone down before anything else happens.
“Just got in,” he answers, nodding toward the door. “I called hello. You didn’t answer.”
Felix has a key to your place, free to come and go as he pleases, so it’s not exactly unusual for him to turn up like this. He’s dressed in a big t-shirt and joggers, practice clothes, obviously fresh from the studio with the rest of the guys.
“I was distracted,” you murmur.
“I guess so,” he grins at you.
You offer a halfhearted smile in return, feeling stupid for your bad mood, caused by something so out of your control. Shopping shouldn’t ruin your day. Felix pulls out your other dining chair to sit across from you at the small dining table, and you can’t help but stare at his body as he settles down. 
He’s so…skinny.
You’re envious. You shouldn’t be, because your body is plenty good enough as it is. But you are. With a body like that, you could wear anything.
“What are you doing?” he asks you.
You hesitate, but Felix pays no mind to your internal struggle, reaching across the table to pick up the scrap of paper covered in your measurements. You want to snatch the paper out of his hands, which is ridiculous. He knows what your body looks like. Seeing the numbers that describe it isn’t going to scare him off.
But still, you feel that sick self-consciousness rising up as he glances over the paper, and sets it back down.
“I’m trying to buy jeans,” you say weakly.
“Trying?” Felix prods.
“Trying and failing.”
You pick up your phone, unlock it, and shove it at him, the screen still open to the last pair of too-small jeans. He peers at the listing, at the chart full of centimeters, and then down at your measurements scrawled out in your handwriting.
“They call that a large?” Felix says, amazed, and you cringe. “It’s like a half-centimeter difference.”
You know he’s just surprised since shopping for women’s clothes isn’t something he does often, and you’re sure he doesn’t know how common this problem is for you. But his words still sting a little.
“Yeah,” you say, “I think I’m done for tonight.”
You try not to let your deep-seated disappointment in the situation, and in yourself, show too much. Felix watches as you stand up and stretch. You can tell he’s thinking hard, can see that he wants to say something. But you really don’t need his commentary on this. You spend enough time thinking about your body, wanting to change your body, hating that you want to change your body…
“Do you want dinner? I went to the store earlier,” you say, determined to change the subject.
“Sure,” Felix agrees easily.
You cross your little kitchen and fling open the cupboard to dig out groceries for your meal. At least this is a task to take your mind off everything.
You don’t even notice as Felix takes the slip of paper from the table and folds it into his pocket.
--------------- Some days later, you all but trip into your bedroom after work, exhausted but hopeful.
Felix’s shoes and jacket were both waiting by the front door when you came in, which means he’s here waiting for you. He was nowhere to be seen in the rest of your small apartment, so that leaves this.
Of course, you’re not disappointed; Felix is lounging on your bed, playing on his phone and looking like the epitome of comfort in lounge pants and messy blonde hair. He smiles like the sunrise when he sees you.
“Hi, angel,” he says, as you drop your bag on the floor.
Instead of replying, you let yourself fall onto the bed beside him, flat on your back, and stretch out your poor sore limbs like a starfish.
“Long day?” he asks.
“The longest,” you agree.
“You’re in luck, though,” he says, “I have a surprise for you.”
You turn your head to look at him. “Really?”
He nods.
“Then gimme!” you quip.
Felix laughs brightly, and unfolds himself to retrieve a small gift bag from the side of the bed, tucked out of view. He hands it to you, and it’s surprisingly heavy and dense for its size. Today isn’t a special day by any means. Just a weekday, a work day, and you wrack your brain to figure out exactly why your boyfriend decided tonight was the night for presents.
“Can I open it?” you ask.
“You’d better,” says Felix, settling back down to watch you.
So you unceremoniously rip out the tissue paper packing, and when you’re met with a small pile of folded fabric, you upend the whole bag onto your bed.
There are four things inside.
A soft, oversized t-shirt, loose and comfortable and your favorite color, to boot.
A pair of thigh-high stockings.
A single thigh garter, in bright white.
And a pair of panties, also white. You unfold the underwear, to reveal a heart-shaped cutout on the back, and at the bottom…
“Crotchless?!” you ask, flustered.
Felix shrugs, his expression mischievous, “I thought they suited you.”
“What’s all this about?” you ask.
“I wanted to prove a point,” he says.
“What point can you prove with lingerie?”
“I’m proving pretty clearly that plenty of stores sell things to your measurements,” he says cheekily, “Just not that one store you were on the other day.”
Oh, my God.
You’re equal parts mortified and absolutely melting with the sweetness at the heart of this gesture. You didn’t realize that he was paying this much attention to you that day. You didn’t realize he knew how frustrated you were, how discouraged.
“They’re pretty,” you admit, turning the panties over in your hands.
“Then try them on for me.”
Felix’s tone is suggestive and low, lower than usual, and you know for certain that he didn’t just buy these things to cheer you up. He’s got an ulterior motive here.
“What’s in it for me?” you tease.
“Dress up for me and find out,” Felix replies.
Never one to turn down the prospect of some fun, you gather up the clothes and dart across the hall into your tiny bathroom. If Felix wants you to dress up for him, you need to do that alone and make a spectacle of it.
You dump the armful of clothing onto the counter. There’s no bra or anything, so you assume that Felix means for you to wear only the t-shirt. And that’s exactly what you do, stripping out of your work clothes and pulling the shirt over your head. You put on the panties, noting exactly how well they fit. The elastic doesn’t dig, and they don’t ride up, just smooth fabric and lace against your skin, hugging the curve of your ass. You try to forget about the opening at the bottom, baring you to the world; you already know Felix fully intends to use it, but you can’t believe he’s done this. It’s bold, even for him.
The thigh-highs come next, and while these also fit more nicely than any pair of tights you’ve ever owned, you have thick thighs, and the soft skin dimples around the top elastic band. You slide the thigh garter onto one leg, settling it at the top of the stocking. It only makes that indent more pronounced, soft flesh giving way under the thick white band. But you try your hardest not to feel self-conscious about it.
Felix picked these things for you. That means he wants to see you like this.
You pluck up all your courage, and walk back into your bedroom. Felix is waiting eagerly, and when you come into view, lingering shyly at the doorway, he smirks. 
Honest-to-God smirks.
“Oh, angel,” he says, his deep voice nearly breaking over the syllables, “Oh, yes.”
You can see plainly on his face how much this little outfit is affecting him, and it sends a little thrill down your spine. Because truly, these clothes aren’t too out of the ordinary. The thigh-highs are new, and the panties aren’t something you would have picked for yourself, but it’s hard not to feel like you’re just wearing…a t-shirt and underwear.
It’s the intimacy, you decide. The fact that Felix carefully chose items in your most precise, comfortable sizes, and built you a sexy little dress-up kit that makes you feel as good as you look…God. Overwhelmingly intimate, you realize, and hot as hell.
“Let me see you, come here and give me a little spin,” Felix teases, twirling his finger in the air to mimic the model turn he’s demanding.
Smiling, squashing down a touch of embarrassment, you comply, coming to stand before Felix and turning around slowly on the spot. You can feel his eyes on you, and as you turn your back on him completely, you hear your bed creak.
Hands land on your waist as Felix pulls you flush against his front, and you can feel how hard he is already, filling out the front of his sweatpants. He’s always eager, always relishes the time you get to spend lost in each other, but he seems especially brazen tonight, as he grinds his clothed cock against your ass and slides his hands under the t-shirt to cup your bare breasts.
“You don’t even know what you do to me,” he murmurs.
You turn around in his arms, letting his hands drop back to your waist. He’s grinning at you with no small amount of lust in his eyes. You’re sure that you look similarly affected; you can already feel wetness gathering between your legs. His undivided attention, especially when you’re dressed up like this just for him, has you going out of your mind with want.
“Then show me,” you say.
He huffs out a laugh before diving in to kiss you, his pouty bow-shaped lips moving against yours roughly. Felix kisses like he’s starving and you’re one of the desserts that he loves to bake, like he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he stops ravishing you. His hands wander down to your ass, pinching hard enough that you squeak.
“Easy on the goods!” you chastise, as the spot aches deliciously.
Felix just pinches you again, harder, and guides you back toward your bed. You lay back on the mattress with Felix right behind you, settling between your spread legs. He sits back on his heels, just looking down at you beneath him in your skimpy panties and stockings. He runs his hands down your thighs indulgently, sliding a finger under the garter on one side and pulling it back so that it snaps against your skin.
“Angel, I should’ve thought of this a long time ago,” he says.
There’s no time for you to tease him, because Felix pulls his shirt over his head and discards it over the side of the bed, and you’re taken in by his gorgeous lithe body, his tiny waist and the rippling lines of his abs. No matter how many times you see him like this, it’s still exciting, that you can have someone so beautiful. He takes hold of the hem of your t-shirt next, and coaxes you upright so that he can take that off, too.
Your body is the exact opposite of his, soft where his is hard, sloping curves instead of the sharp cut of his ribs and hips and shoulders. But he leans right down over you and begins to kiss and nibble his way down your body, starting at the juncture of your collarbone. He trails his mouth over your chest, down to suck one of your nipples into his mouth. You gasp as he grazes his teeth over the bud, and he laughs gently.
Felix continues his slow ascent as you grasp at the sheets, mouthing over your stomach, soft like the rest of you. His hands hold your legs open wide for him as he moves down your body. He skips over your core entirely, choosing instead to bite sharply into the exposed skin of your upper thigh, above the band of the stockings.
“Lix!” you gasp, unable to help how your hips twitch forward at the sensation of his teeth.
He hums in response, leisurely delving forward to press a single lingering kiss to your folds, on full display in these deceptively pure white panties that hide absolutely nothing.
“Fucking love your legs,” Felix all but growls against the soft skin of your inner thigh, “Fucking love-”
Your hand flies down to grip at Felix’s hair as he bites a second bruise, this one on the tender inside of your leg. He’s never been this singularly-focused before, and you marvel at the way he’s worshipping your thighs, your waist, his hands roaming your ass and tweaking the fabric of the thigh-highs. You’ve always known that Felix liked your body – he’s your fucking boyfriend, after all. But this…
“Felix, I can’t,” you whine, “I need you, I need…”
“Oh, believe me,” Felix says, “I need it more.”
He draws away from you to push and kick his sweats and underwear off, and you watch hungrily as his cock bobs free, painfully hard and already leaking precome.
“You want – like this?” you ask, as Felix drops back on top of you, the head of his cock already nudging up against your pussy.
Felix likes it from behind, likes being able to grab your ass and watch your back arch as he drives into you. He likes you on top, so he can watch you bring yourself to orgasm using him. This is uncommon for you, missionary, you sprawled underneath Felix as he bends your knees up for better access and strokes his fingers down the length of your legs.
He nods, breathless. “Wanna see your face.”
His soft, honest admission makes your heart flutter even as you swear you can feel the arousal thrumming in your veins. You need him, need him so badly you could cry –
With a shift of his hips, Felix lines himself up and pushes into you. He’s agonizingly slow with it, just letting the head split your walls before he drags back out. He’s teasing you, absolutely doing this on purpose, and you can’t handle it. You untangle one hand from the sheets to cling to him, as he just dips the head of his cock in and out of you.
You whimper your frustration, and Felix leans in to kiss your cheeks, your nose, before pushing back in deeper, and deeper again, and finally he’s buried in you to the hilt.
“So gorgeous,” he groans, his deep voice reverbing in his chest, “You’re so good, angel, so good.”
He has one hand gripping your thigh tightly, holding your leg up beside your torso in a position that tests your flexibility more than a little bit. The other hand is digging into the curve of your hip, hard enough that you think there will be bruises.
Felix has those dancers’ hips, and core strength that lets him drive into you like he’s doing now, smooth long strokes that you arch up to meet as well as you can in his grip. He’s holding you at an angle that lets his pelvis grind against your clit every time he bottoms out. It’s not enough stimulation to let you finish, but it’s more than enough to drive you out of your mind.
“Lix, Lix, please,” you beg, not even sure what you’re asking for.
He says something, quiet enough that you can’t really pick it up, and when you move your hand from his dip of his spine to the back of his head, Felix fixes his gaze right on you. He’s still speaking, rambling in his deep voice.  
“-Let a fucking app make you think you’re not perfect cuz their fucking jeans don’t fit you,” he’s saying, “So soft, so pretty, like fuckin’ heaven, look at you.”
You can’t look at yourself all that well, but you can look at Felix, glance down to see the way he’s burying his cock in you again and again, holding himself up to look you in the eye as he fucks you into the mattress.
“Perfect,” he swears, “Taking me like a dream, angel…”
He’s never this vocal, either, and the talk has your head spinning almost as much as the brutal pace he’s maintaining. You can hear the obscene sound of your wetness around him. The desperate, weak first stirrings of an orgasm are starting to creep up on you, but you know yourself. You’re going to need more than this to finish.
Even so, you clench around Felix as he works himself into you again, and again, and he laughs breathlessly at the feeling of it.
“Are you gonna cum for me?” Felix asks, low and sweet.
You shake your head desperately, “Not enough – Lix, please, I need-”
“Not enough?” he echoes, amused, as his hips snap against yours in perfect time, “What, is this not good enough for you, angel?”
“So good, so good, just, please,” you whine.
Felix doesn’t answer you, but he does let go of your leg to bring his fingers up to your face. You’re so far gone, so hazy with lust and the orgasm that’s building but just isn’t close enough, that you barely notice him until his fingers are pressing at your lips.
He has small, beautiful hands, and you open your mouth to let him slip two dainty fingers into your mouth. You suck on the digits, knowing how much Felix likes having your mouth on him, or his on you. He’s not picky, as long as someone is licking, biting, sucking…
“So dirty,” he sighs.
Only for him, you think to yourself. You can’t summon the words to say to him out loud, but you certainly think them. Only for him.
“Don’t hold back on me now, angel,” Felix says.
He retrieves his fingers from your mouth, and snakes his hand down between your bodies to press them feather-light to your clit. You can’t help the gasp that escapes from you as he touches you, gentle and precise. The slide would have been wet and easy enough even without the extra help, but the combination of your saliva and your wetness as it seeps out around Felix’s thick cock makes his fingers glide over your clit with friction so good it’s almost painful.
Under your breath, almost like a prayer, you’re murmuring, chanting, “Please, please, please, please, oh-”
“You first,” he says, “Come on, are you gonna give me one?”
You want to, God, do you want to. You writhe in his hold, torn between rocking away from the steady delicious pressure on your clit and into the press of his cock splitting you open. Felix throws his head back as you tremble around him - your peak is so close you can fucking taste it - and groans.
“Love you,” Felix gasps, “Shit, love you, love your body-”
That’s what does it.
That view, Felix above you, so fucked out, working so hard to make you feel good. Physically and mentally, that’s what he’s trying to do. He saw you being upset for like fifteen minutes the other day and he’s putting in all this effort to build you up. He just wants you to feel good –
“Felix!”
His name passes your lips, just once, before you’re cumming hard with a strangled moan. Felix fucks into you hard once, twice, and then thrusts into you fully with a cry of his own as he cums against your walls. He’s quick to drop down and meet your lips in a messy kiss, pressing your bodies together, skin on skin.
The two of you shudder and murmur your way through your orgasms, as you marvel at how quickly he was able to bring you crashing right over the peak with him.
Once your voice comes back to you, all your can manage is another squeaking, “Felix.”
“Yeah,” he answers, decisive, like you’ve just revealed the secrets of the universe to him. “Yeah.”
He pulls out and gingerly moves off of you, but not without stroking his hands from your waist all the way down your thighs as he goes. You laugh quietly as Felix collapses onto his back beside you, wiping his brow dramatically like he’s just gotten off a hard day at work. His cum begins to drip back out of you as you sit up, which is gross, but you just want to be close to him. You curl against his side, head on his chest, and Felix accommodates you easily, cuddling into you just as eagerly.
As you readjust on the bed, settle into a more comfortable position, you notice the bruises. Tender new bruises on your hip, and along the side of your thigh where Felix had held you so tightly. It’s the perfect shape of his fingertips, fanning out along your skin.
“Jeez,” you murmur, touching the spots and secretly relishing the way they hurt.
“Sorry,” Felix grins, though he doesn’t look very sorry at all. “Just…your thighs. Your body. Love it.”
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tamagochiie · 4 years
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pairing: timeskip!kenma x fem!reader synopsis: You come home late from your cousin’s funeral, and though Kenma didn’t expect much from you but perhaps a few leftovers you’ve managed to steal away from the dinner, he finds you with a surprise: a sleeping child cradled around your neck and a teenage boy hovering behind you. Your poor boyfriend wondering what in the hell it is you’re plotting… tags: angst and fluff, time skip!, slight spoilers if you squint warnings: mentions of death, mentions of depression, cursing, mentioned homophobia w/c: 3.6k
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tagging list:  @angrylittleriri​ @chims-kookies​ @gooseyhouse @kiyokoscunchie​ @unhappyraspberry​ @elianetsantana​ 
a/n: welcome to the THIRD chapter of the fic! i hope you’re all doing well since i’ve last posted. I genuinely apologize for the delay! a few personal things kinda popped up, and it kinda derailed the process of posting this fic, but at least we’re here now!  this is a bit longer compared to the other chapters, but i hope you all enjoy! please ignore any grammar mistakes, i proof read this to the best of my ability and it’s currently 5 in the morning :’) 
see you all next week for the final chapter.  p.s. I do have a smol surprise, so stay tuned for next week! 
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<< life as she’s known it | life as they’ll know it >>
Kenma had always been aware of the common misconception people had of him, and the lack of interest they had to confirm it: that he had the inability to express his thoughts and feelings let alone identify it. 
In a way, he did find it rather difficult to open up. Being bullied as a child silenced him into the dreading assumption that anyone who was kind to him or showed any interest in him were only doing so just to mess with him. 
It took Kuroo quite a lot when he first met Kenma. He bent his little body over and under, jumping through hoops like a show pony just to get Kenma to even blink his way. And though all that effort strained him, he wouldn’t hesitate to tell you he’d do it all again if he could. 
But it wasn’t a question of whether or not Kenma could identify what he was feeling and thoroughly express it. He had the right words, all of which were hanging off the tip of his tongue. He just didn’t know how to say it without sounding insensitive or heartless. 
So as he stares at Yuki twirling in a dress you found digging through one of your old childhood clothes, his lips run dry. His words tuck behind the swell of his heart because though Yuki does indeed look like the cutest child he’s ever seen, his thoughts are full of concern, worried about what people say to a little boy showing up in a jean overall dress with purple and yellow flowers embroidered at the hem. 
His eyes gape onto the sight before him, flickering over to Eiji when he hears him clear his throat. He seems just as troubled, quieter than usual while he watches over his brother. Not a single trace of amusement is seen in Eiji’s face. He doesn’t seem happy at all, and it phases Kenma; he’s usually stoic if not smiling in the presence of Yuki. 
Yuki continues to giggle himself, gripping onto the material of his dress to have it flow in the air. He looks up to meet your eyes, oblivious to the two boys muddled in their own distress. 
“I’m sorry, Yuki-chan,” You huff, smiling down to the little boy running circles in the middle of the living room. “If I had known the preschool was gonna accept you so soon, I would’ve brought you to the mall...But this should be fine for now, right? Is this okay with you, Yuki-chan?” 
Yuki disregards your apology, holding up your old frog raincoat as he beams at his “new” found clothes. 
“Plus, these don’t look so old, and it doesn’t look too girly, don’t you think?” You turn to Kenma who spares you nothing more than a nod. You follow his gaze and find it etched into the embroidered hem. 
It doesn’t pass off as boy clothes, he thinks, letting your words breeze past him. 
Kenma isn’t shy with breaking gender norms; he’s worn a few skirts and dresses himself, all that are still sitting in his closet to be worn again. His qualms aren’t with Yuki wearing a dress, but the treatment he’s expected to get when he shows up to his first day of school. He’ll be bullied into the same silence Kenma faced, and he’ll amount to nothing more than rubble beneath their judgement. 
They say times are changing, so the people must be too, right? But there’s a persistent constricting feeling building up in his chest as if it comes as a warning sign. And the fact that Eiji looks just as uneasy as himself hints that maybe Yuki should change out of something less...worrisome. 
“Mmm, Yuki,” Kenma clears his throat, trying to subside the build up of his uneasiness, “maybe you should wear something else…?” Yuki’s smile falters at his words as confusion colors away his joy. “I think you should wear the pants with the little frog shirt you picked out instead.” 
He doesn’t mean for his words to come out bitter and cold, and the momentum of his panic leaves a lump in his throat he isn’t too sure he’ll be able to swallow if he keeps his silence. 
Yuki looks up to him, blinking away at his words with glistening eyes. “I don’t look pretty?” Yuki’s voice comes out small--smaller than his fingers and toes. Smaller than his ability to comprehend where Kenma’s truly coming from. “You don’t like it, Kenma-san..?”
Oh no, he thinks to himself. Panic rises from his stomach and climbs up to his chest; a tightness in his throat soon follows when Yuki begins to blubber, telling him how mean he’s being. I didn’t mean to make him--
“Kozume.” You chide, looking at him quizzically. He meets your eyes and he instantly freezes up, thinking you, too, have come to misunderstand him. “What are you doing? Do something.” 
But he can’t. If he opens his mouth, he’ll only sound meaner than before, and he’d rather not add any more confusion or any more pain to the little boy. 
“Say something,” You push, glaring at him. “Kozume.” 
His throat goes dry as well as his lips, and when he finally does gain enough courage, Eiji takes a step forward beating him to the punch. “Yuki, I think it’s better you just wear pants. Dresses are for girls, and you shouldn’t be wearing this kind of stuff.” 
Your eyes widen and so does Kenma’s. Eiji’s is stern and clear in contrast to all the other times he’s spoken since he’s arrived. You watch as he kneels to meet Yuki’s eyes, placing a hand on his shoulder before running it up to his cheek to wipe away his tears. 
“There might be some problems if you wear a dress to school, Yuki-chan. And didn’t we promise each other we wouldn’t cause them any trouble for Oba-san and Kenma-san while we’re here?” Eiji’s voice is a lot soft, yet his words are still firm. Yuki quietly submits to his brother, hanging his head low as he continues to cry. 
You stand there both stunned. 
You want to speak up, but you’re still unsure of your place; who you are and what you can say. So you stand there with Kenma tightlipped at your side with tension hanging above your heads, watching as Yuki quietly sniffles to himself as he hugs the pile of clothes he’s picked and carries it into their shared bedroom. 
Needless to say, everyone goes to bed tucked beneath the covers of their guilt. 
                                                                                   ❁ ❁ ❁
Quiet mornings with a steaming cup at hand while treading lightly through the endless sea of emails in his iPad brought Kenma an odd sense of peace, and he looked forward to it every morning. But much to Kenma’s dismay, the apartment is too quiet and the coffee bitter; the chill in the atmosphere is unsettling as he falls into deep thought. 
He thinks back to the events of last night; Yuki’s crying face, your contorted look of confusion, and Eiji’s words. It all comes pouring down on him like a bucket of cold water. 
Not even his coffee can spare him from the chill down his spine. 
He mentally kicks himself, thinking of all the other ways he could’ve said it better. How he could’ve prevented him from breaking Yuki’s little heart and avoided your cold shoulder as you left in a hurry to take the kids to their schools. 
Kenma sucks in a breath as the stinging spreads across his chest. The weight of his cup grows heavy and he shifts his grip to a more comfortable hold. Nothing about the morning is comforting, and it leaves Kenma in distress, the feeling spilling into his work as he continues about his day. 
He can barely read a single line of an email let alone write one; his senses aren’t as sharp as he struggles to smoothen his hand-eye coordination during gaming; and he catches himself zoning out in the middle of his online meetings, barely humming responses to questions he pretends to hear. 
Kenma wonders how Yuki’s doing, and what he could do to apologize and gain his trust back. Maybe he’ll get some strawberry milk on the way to fetch him, or buy the little duck umbrella he caught him eyeing at the convenience store. 
Kenma isn’t good with words if one were to ask him to be gentle and kind. He’s blunt and straight to the point, and it took him more than just a while to get used to softening the blow of his words and how he delivers them. 
And now, as he muddles in his misery does he ingrain those habits deeper into thought until it becomes muscle memory to his lips. 
He’s only then pulled from his squabbles when the doorbells rings throughout the apartment. His feet drag him to the door as his mutters in his resentment. What in the hell could be here--
“You’re shitting me.” Kenma grimaces at  the sight of the cheeky grin plastered across his best friend’s face as he opens the door; his hair tousled to the side and his usual business attire unkempt.  “What the hell do you want?” 
Kuroo pouts, pretending to be wounded by the bitter greeting as he holds a hand to his heart. “Is that how you greet an old friend?” 
“Not now, Kuroo-san.” Despite the bite in his words and his half-hearted attempt to shut the door, Kuroo welcomes himself in, kicking his shoes to the side before trailing behind him. 
“I miss your calls,” Kuroo teases, eyes wandering about the apartment, “you don’t even text me back anymore.” 
“I don’t have the time.” Kenma grits as he pinches the bridge of his nose. A drunken, dizzying feeling whirling in his head; probably because of all the coffee he’s downed and the little water he’s consumed. “Whatever it is you’re here to pester me with, please save it for another time and leave.” 
“Why? Stay at home daddy roles keeping you occupied?” The cushion of the couch bends beneath Kuroo’s weight as he leisurely raises his feet to the coffee table, arms relaxing over to the arm rest. “I wasn’t so surprised when you became a CEO, but this--fatherhood was something I’d imagined you’d do much later...” 
Irritation seeps through Kenma’s skin in the form of tense muscles and a clenched jaw as Kuroo continues on to pass cheap jokes and badgers him. He swipes a bottle warm from the fridge before joining Kuroo on the other side of the couch, kicking his foot off the table on the way. 
“You’re so cold to me.” Kuroo whines, ruffling Kenma’s pudding head hair, earning a disapproving tsk. “Seriously, how’s it someone like you skips the step to marriage and dives straight to having kids? I’m a bit hurt. I had to hear it from Shoyo. Like, seriously? Shoyo? I thought I was your best friend?” 
“Self-proclaimed.” He corrects, unbothered by Kuroo’s sore expression as he untwists the cap from the bottle before chugging the water down in one breath. “Will you leave now?” 
“Why are you so keen to push me out?” Kuroo lifts himself off the warmth of the cushions, moving closer to his evidently troubled friend as he picks off the seal from the plastic bottle. “Kenma, are you okay? Kyanma?”
Pinching the bridge of his nose once again, Kenma shakes his head as he leans his head back. Kuroo tilts his head, watching as his friend unravels in his pain; manifesting both metaphorically and physically. 
“I’ve said something mean to a little boy and he didn’t even deserve it.” Kenma fiddles the empty bottle, tossing it to the side before anxiously fiddling with his fingers. 
“What happened?” 
A deep and heavy sigh escapes him, “He was wearing a dress and I told him he shouldn’t. A-And, And it’s not like I didn’t want him to. I don’t mind it all, but people are mean and the thought that he might face the same kind of treatment I did--Kuroo-san, I don’t want that.”
“You only meant well,” Kuroo places his hand on Kenma’s shoulder, rubbing circles against the material of his old Nekoma sweater. “Though, you could’ve said it better--” 
“You know damn well I’m not good at that!” Kenma spits, cutting him off. 
“But the point is, you meant well!” He reiterates. “Might’ve come across as a lil douche-y, but the intentions were there. But I think you of all people know that no matter what, there’ll always be someone mean. And I don’t think you can shield him from that. Maybe temporarily, but not forever.” 
“I don’t want that kind of pain for him!” Kenma abruptly stands from his place, frustration tingling at his fingertips as it spreads throughout the rest of his body. “He’s so small, Kuroo-san. You should’ve seen him. I said one thing and it already looked like he was gonna break. What happens when he hears words worse than mine? What’ll I do then? What can I do for him?” 
Sniffling. It is the sound that follows after Kenma’s voice breaks and causes Kuroo to raise his brows. At first he thinks his ears have tricked him, but when he finds tears pooling down to his chin as he collapses back onto his seat. 
And it is at this moment, after all the time that has passed, has he seen him break.  
“I-I don’t know how to do any of this. I’m so confused.” Kenma babbles on, stumbling on his own words and choking in between his sobs. And all Kuroo can offer is a soft, rhythmic pat on his back to try and calm him down.
“I’ve been doing some reading about how to understand children or how to raise one, but it's so different. There’s all these theories and guidelines, but no one tells you that you forget everything you read the second they appear in front of you…” 
Kenma holds his head in his trembling hands, crying even harder. All the while he wonders what the child version of him would think if saw him as fragile as the fallen leaves that’d crunch beneath his feet. He’d wonder if he had known the stress he’d fall prey to, would he have continued? 
But as the image of you bleed through his worries, he’s more than sure of his answer. 
Yes. 
Yes, I would. 
Over and over again in one breath. 
“You will be to that child what you needed when you were bullied.” Kuroo’s words are steady, matched with an endearing smile to comfort Kenma’s crying as he meets his glistening gaze. “You needed someone to reassure you that all you heard were nothing but lies, so you do that for him.” 
“Ah, my dear friend, have you not heard of the phrase ‘It takes a village to raise a child’?” Kenma merely blinks at him quizzically as Kuroo snakes an arm around him to bring him close. “What I’m tryna say is: stop acting like you don’t have me, and Shoyo, and the rest of your friends who’re just within your reach. No one ever said it was only just going to be the two of you.” 
Kenma swallows thickly, nodding in agreement as he wipes away the snot dripping from the tip of his nose. He says his thanks that’s quieter than a whisper, it comes airy and a bit croaky from crying. 
The words of his best friend doesn’t immediately fill his heart with peace, but it does lift a little weight from his shoulders. It does give him the sense of security he’s been searching for. And all Kenma wants to do now is apologize to Yuki-- 
“Speaking of,” Kuroo clears his throat, wandering his eyes around the expanse of the apartment. “Where are the kids…?” 
“Oh, shit.” 
                                                           ❁ ❁ ❁
Kuroo and Kenma’s feet click clack against the pavement as they run down to Yuki’s preschool. The cool afternoon air winds past the pair; Kenma’s chest is heaving in pain while Kuroo barely breaks a sweat. 
“I can’t believe you forgot the child!” Kuroo shouts behind him, laughing at Kenma struggling to catch up. “How could you forget a child?” 
“I was pretty preoccupied today!” Kenma countered between ragged breaths. “If your ass didn’t show up I would’ve remembered!” 
“Not with all that crying!”
“Don’t you dare bring that up ever!” 
Kuroo’s hyena laugh carries two blocks over. Head turn as the two continue to bicker all the way down until they arrive at the preschool. Children clamoring before the gate, mingling with their parents and Kenma’s hooded gaze sweeps through the crowd to find a familiar tousled head of hair. 
“What’s he look like?” Kuroo towers over Kenma and the children, squinting his eyes and looking around as if he’s got any clue. 
“He, uh, he should be wearing jeans and a frog shir--” Kenma’s attention is pulled from a string of voices singing praises to find Yuki proudly twirling in his embroidered dress, basking in their compliment. 
It becomes clear to Kenma you dire need to leave the house immediately was because of this. Because you were being coy.
But Yuki’s joy is short-lived, locking eyes with Kenma huffing for air after all the running. But to the young boy gaping up at him, it looks as if he’s ready to yell. So he stops his twirling, his smile slipping away as the rest of the kids’ turn to face him. 
Yuki straightens himself, adjusting the straps of his backpack as he carefully walks towards Kenma with his head hung low. Kuroo elbows his side and nearly knocks out the little air he has left. 
He swipes his tongue across his lips before he speaks, But before he can even utter a sound, his train of thought is pulled from him once again. 
“Disgusting.” An abrasive, disembodied voice grimaces. Not a single care if they’re heard. 
“Why the hell is he wearing a dress?” Says another. 
“Honestly, this generation…” 
“Boy’s aren’t supposed to be wearing dresses.” 
The chattering picks up and soon all the parents are ogling at Yuki who can hear them all so clearly, and Kenma notices him shrinking into his froggy raincoat, trying to hide from their judgemental stares. 
This, Kenma thinks. This is exactly what I mean. 
Kenma is not an emotional person, and not once did he ever raise his voice or act on what he was feeling without thinking it over. And as much as he’d like to throw his hands and cause a scene, he remembers Kuroo’s advice. 
“Who’s child is this?” One of the mothers questions. “Who does this child belong to?” 
“He belongs to me, Miss.” Kenma rasps, taking Yuki’s hand in his before turning to the woman. “I am the guardian and this is my child.” 
“And you allow your child to wear a dress?” 
“Yes.” He answers, finding the footing in his confidence to talk back to a woman who can easily tower over him if she steps closer. “Yes, and what does that have to do with you?” 
“Have you no shame?” She glares at him in disgust, sighing. “He’s a boy! Boy’s shouldn’t be wearing dresses! It’s for girls! What kind of message are you trying to teach him?”
 “And what about you, Miss? Are you proud to show your kid and all these other young minds that its okay to be a bigot? That it’s okay to be uneducated?” 
“I beg your pardon?” 
“Then beg.” Kenma spits, his cat eyes burning holes into the mother’s skin. He’s completely unphased by the growing whispers exchanged between the parents. Kuroo watches proudly in the background, quietly cheering him on. “Skirts were worn by both men and women during the prehistoric times, and biologically speaking, it makes more sense if men were to wear skirts. They only stopped because people as close minded and uneducated as you feared femininity.” 
“So I should ask you the same question, Miss: have you no shame? Telling a small child he’s disgusting because we wanted to wear something that made him happy and comfortable. Is he hurting you?” 
The woman’s lips fall to an ‘o’ as she’s at a loss for words, and Kenma relishes in his growing confidence, bending down to Yuki to pick him up and rest him onto his hip. 
“You have no right to talk to my child that way.” Kenma clears his throat, taking a step back as he maintains eye contact with all the parents at sight. “Let me make this very clear: should you feel the need to take my place as his guardian and try to speak for me, I suggest you don’t.” 
Kenma let’s his words linger in the air and begins to walk away, Kuroo slipping through the sea of parents to walk alongside him. 
A smirk slips across his lips, looking down to Yuki clinging his around Kenma’s neck. 
“Wow,” Kuroo breathes, amusement lacing in his tone. “I didn’t think you had it in ya.” 
“Oh my god, I never wanna do that again.” Kenma twitches the cringe out from his body before pressing Yuki closer to him. “I hate talking to people.” 
“But you did a very good job, I’m actually super proud.” 
“Shut up,” Kenma mutters, locking his eyes onto the pavement ahead of him. 
He’s still shocked, unable to believe what had just transpired. He hated the feeling of everyone’s eyes fixed on him, and how quiet it was when he spoke. He hated having to speak up. 
But if had to do it again, he would. 
He’d do it again and again in one breath. 
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earthfluuke · 4 years
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so @tharntypesupportclub & i were both doing the same ship tag the other day, and i got earnpear and they got saratine. when asked ‘who spends the most while out shopping,’ we both answered pear and tine respectively. we then continued to say that earn and sarawat would carry all of their bags for them. and, because of that, this fic was born.
it’s completely ridiculous and silly, but i think it’s cute. whipped boyfriend/girlfriend culture as well as mlm x wlw solidarity? what could be better!
Sagging further into his chair, Sarawat sighs. Elbow nudging the girl in the chair next to him, he asks, “How long have we been here?”
Lifting her head from where it’s rested against the wall behind her, Earn clicks open her phone. Flashing him the screen, she says, “At least an hour. Probably longer.” She lets her head fall back again with a hard thunk. “Why do we agree to this every time?”
“Earn, Earn!” Pear skids to a halt, thrusting a soft cream sweater into her girlfriend’s hands. “What do you think? Will it match that black skirt I just bought? The one with the gold belt?”
“Wat!” Tine appear beside him, holding two shirts next to his face. “Which one? I have nothing like the blue one, but the striped one would go so well with these brown pants I found.”
Two sets of wide eyes blink hopefully at them. Sarawat shoots Earn a knowing glance, to which she only nods. “Oh, right; that’s why.”
Tine is helping Pear find a necklace to go with a dress she picked out when a store clerk approaches them with a smile and a coo. “You make such a lovely couple. It’s so nice seeing a young man so invested in his girlfriend’s interests.”
Tine shares a glance with Pear before the two of them burst into a fit of giggles. The poor store clerk, bless her, looks so confused. Quick to compose himself, Tine shakes his head and wipes a tear from his eye.
“You misunderstand,” he tells her. “We’re just friends.”
Pear nods next to him, swallowing back the remainder of her laughter. “Tine is really cute, but he’s not exactly my type.”
“Aw.” Tine slumps down to rest his cheek on top of his head and lets out a dramatic breath. “But I have just as nice of a chest as Earn does.”
“Don’t believe everything Sarawat tells you.” Swatting him away, she runs her fingers through her hair as she pouts at him. “And stop messing up my hair. I spent extra time curling it this morning.”
Tine resorts to poking her in the side instead, chasing after her when she jerks out of the way. “And why is that? Excited for your date? Still trying to impress your girlfriend even though you’ve been together for ages, and you’ve got her completely whipped?”
“You’re one to talk!”
Their banter only continues, and at some point, the store clerk just walks away.
“Sarawat,” Pear calls sweetly. He turns around, and just as he tilts his head down to look at her, she’s shoving a stack of dress shirts, all a mixture of different rusty orange and red tones, into his arms. He clutches them to his chest, blinking at her in confusion. But before he can ask any of the questions rushing to his mind, she says, “Tine says he likes this color on you best.”
With none of those dozens of questions answered, he can only ask, “Okay. So?”
She huffs, nose scrunching in frustration. “So, I’m doing you a favor. Now, come on.” She spins him around in the direction of the fitting rooms and nudges him towards them with a hand to his back. “Let’s see which ones he likes best!”
There’s not much he can do; Pear asked something of him, and honestly, he doesn’t know how to say no to her.
“Every time we come here, you never buy anything,” Sarawat points out. They’ve been dragged into a shoe store and have taken refuge on a long leather couch. “Come to think of it, I don’t think you’ve ever even tried anything on. And you seem to like clothes well enough.”
“I do,” she says, fixing the beret atop her head. “It’s just easier to shop online. Less stress, less of a time commitment. Besides, I couldn’t shop for myself if I wanted to.”
As if on cue, Pear comes towards them, three shoeboxes in hand and a smile on her pretty, pink painted lips. “I saw a few more I want to get in my size. But.” She calls attention to the boxes, lifting them a bit higher for emphasis. “I can’t with my hands full. Could you watch these for me? Please?”
Sarawat finds it funny that she thinks she even needs to ask, what with the way Earn’s gaze softens as she holds her hands out to take them. Pear’s smile widens, and she places the boxes onto her lap. Leaning down to press a quick kiss to her cheek, she scampers off down another aisle.
“See what I mean?” she says, holding onto the boxes with one hand as she rubs the lipstick stain from her cheek with the other. “Can’t shop for myself when I’m with Pear. Not enough hands.”
Scoffing, Sarawat says, “You give in to her so easily.”
Earn raises an eyebrow. “Really?” She points behind him. “Want to try that again, hypocrite?”
Turning in the direction of her finger, he sighs when Tine smiles at him sheepishly. He can only wordlessly hold out his hand to take his boxes from him and mutter to Earn, “Not a word.”
Pear has a personal vendetta against whichever member of her family cursed her to be so short. Sure, people find it cute, but it’s not cute at all when she has to stand on her tips toes, bounce on the ball of her feet, even jump to try and get something off the high racks of clothes.
Just as she’s about to give up on the cutest yellow sundress, a hand shoots above her head and grabs onto the hanger. Her savior soon turns into her enemy when he only holds it over her, swinging it back and forth teasingly.
Pear doesn’t know why she’s surprised to find Tine smirking down at her when she turns around. She’d happily wipe that satisfied look off his face, if only she could reach. Instead, she juts out her hip, puts one hand on it, and holds the other one out expectantly.
“Come on,” she says. “Give it here.”
Tine hums in thought, “I don’t know. Should I?”
“Yes,” she says, easing up a bit, hoping the littlest bit of sweetness can get her what she wants. “Please, Tine?”
“I don’t know,” he sings, burying any of Pear’s plans on taking the nice route. This absolute tree of a human is playing dirty; so can she.
“If you don’t, I’ll tell Sarawat,” she threatens, though it seems to do little. Tine only holds the dress up higher. With no other choice, she goes in for the kill, “I’ll tell Earn then. Oh, I see her now. Earn!”
Tine shoves the dress into her face before she can continue. Hanging it over the crook of her elbow, she grins and pats his arm. “Pleasure doing business with you.”
Sarawat is used to sitting in front of fitting rooms with Earn, waiting for their respective significant others to model whatever clothes they’ve chosen, but there’s something different about it this time.
Tine steps out in a light blue sweater in that typical style he favors – high neck with a white collar poking out. His hair is slightly tussled from tugging it over his head, and he’s looking at Sarawat for approval.
He motions him forward with the wave of his hand. “Come here,” he says. Tine only tilts his head to the side, and god, could he be any cuter? He waves faster. “Come here.”
When he steps close enough, Sarawat wraps his arms around his waist and pulls him in between his legs. He ignores the little yelp Tine gives, burying his face in his stomach instead. The fabric of the sweater is soft, and Tine’s signature scent has already started rubbing off on it.
Chuckling, Tine cards his fingers through his hair. “Does that mean you like it?” he asks as he strokes his hair. Sarawat hums, and Tine just laughs some more. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
“This is so unfair,” Sarawat mumbles.
“It’s rude,” Earn agrees with a firm nod. “Why will they hold each other’s hands but not ours?”
Tine and Pear stop walking and turn around to look at their significant others with matching smiles. “Because the mall is about to close, and Pear is as short as a middle school student,” Tine answers.
Adding to his point, Pear chirps, “And Tine is tall enough to see over everyone, so I won’t get lost in the crowds.”
“You could hold my hand,” Earn grumbles.
Pear fixes her with a soft, amused look. “You’d have to let me carry some of those bags then, sweetie. I’ve offered, but you won’t let me.”
“Why would I let you carry them?” Earn asks, as though the very idea of doing so offends her. “I can carry them for you; you don’t have to do anything other than stand there and look cute.”
“And hold my boyfriend’s hand apparently,” Sarawat interjects.
“Do you want me to take some of the bags you’re carrying then?” Tine asks. When he reaches out to grab for them, Sarawat holds them closer in defense. Sighing, Tine shakes his head. “Boyfriends.”
“Girlfriends,” Pear sighs along with him in solidarity.
They start walking again, sharing a fond look as the two behind them start up their complaining again. They’re both ridiculous, but they love them. So it evens out.
197 notes · View notes
weeb-alcove · 4 years
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Yesstyle
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I absolutely LOVE Yesstyle! It’s become my favorite place to shop from due to its large variety. It’s an online shopping mall that carries beauty products, clothes, accessories, and other various items from multiple brands and countries in Asia. I would go as far as to say that it’s made shopping at in-person stores harder for me because I’m always thinking of clothes/styles that I saw on Yesstyle!
I’ve bought all sorts of stuff from this website. Here are some of my favorites:
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I have two (in black and in white) that I literally wear all the time. They’re a basic sold for an affordable price on Yesstyle and can be worn by themselves or styled in so many different ways. 
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I was hesitant to purchase pants from Yesstyle due to differences in Asian sizing, but I was pleasantly surprised. They fit perfectly due to the elastic waistband and are super stylish!
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I bought these clip-on cross earrings for super cheap and wear them with nearly every outfit!
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This purchase was for my boyfriend, and he loves it! He wears it frequently with a hoodie underneath :)
Although I have been satisfied with a majority of my purchases, I have run into a few problems, generally with sizing or cheaper material. (Sizing may be mostly my fault for not closely checking measurement charts before purchasing.) Here are some examples:
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I was disappointed with how cheap the material felt and the poor stitching in some areas. 
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I bought this shirt for my boyfriend, and the material was so thin that we could see his nipples through the shirt! The stitching detail on the sleeve also looked poorly done. 
tl;dr  To start off, Yesstyle may not be for everyone due to differences in Asian sizing and brands. Although I love the site, I strongly advise reading reviews for each product before purchasing to avoid sizing, material, and false advertising issues. (This by extension means avoiding purchasing items with no reviews.) On the other hand, I would recommend looking for trendy clothes on Yesstyle due to significantly cheaper prices before buying from American brands with in-store locations. The site even provides pretty accurate shipping estimates; for example, an item that is in-stock for 24 hours will be shipped out almost immediately whereas an item that takes 7-14 days to be in-stock will delay your order by usually 2 weeks. Therefore, I have a high opinion of Yesstyle and will definitely be purchasing more items in the future. However, I recommend paying attention to reviews, sizing, and shipping estimates to maximize satisfaction. 
https://www.yesstyle.com/en/home.html
edit:
Shipping Estimates in more detail: Express shipping is free after purchasing $59 or more. In-stock: 24 hours (shipped out almost immediately) In-stock: 1 - 2 days (shipped out within a week) In-stock: 3 - 5 days (shipped out in a week or a week and a half) 7 - 14 days (shipped out in two weeks or more, may never come) *I’ve had a couple of items that were predicted to have stock in 7 - 14 days, only for the item to become unavailable and never arrive (Yesstyle directly returns the price to your card). Their link will usually eventually say “This item is temporarily out of stock.”
Returns (for unwanted items) usually take around a month or a little more after shipping the package. Hold onto the tracking ID to know where your package is if the return is taking a longer time than expected to process!
Yesstyle Points can now be directly used to reduce your order total at the very end of the ordering process. You get points from purchases (membership tiers have different multipliers), but I’m not really sure how they calculate this. It’s slightly less than the exact amount you paid with coupons and a friend’s/influencer’s reward codes. You can also get $1 for each review with a picture, and 50 cents for just a written review. Earning points for reviews has always been in place, but points were formerly used only to determine membership tiers.
Yesstyle Credit comes from returns. Credit can also be directly used to reduce your order total at the very end of the ordering process.
Friends Reward Code: MONI101
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igotyoukth · 5 years
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Shopping. BTS
Masterlist
Seokjin
Would you be a bad girlfriend, if you abandoned your boyfriend? Probably. But he was making it hard for you to stay with him. He picked up every piece of clothing, pretty or ugly didn’t matter here, and tried them on. Fair enough, other people would look bad in them, while he rocked everything. And it was funny at the beginning, sure. But five hours into shopping with Jin, you were tired of seeing ugly sunglasses and pink shirts.  “Just buy anything!,” you finally exploded, when he shoved another pink item into your face. 
“I won’t buy, okay!,” he responded just as annoyed as you. He had noticed your bad mood since store number 15 or 16, but this didn’t stop him from being playful. He thought his acts would make you feel better. 
“We touched everything in every store, don’t expect me to be all smiles, when you never buy anything,” you tried to calm down. 
“You never tell me your opinion, of course I don’t buy things,when all you say is good, great and pretty without meaning it,” he imitated you with a annoyingly high voice. 
“Sorry, that I can’t do thousand reviews for the thousand things you try on,” your attempt on staying calm failed.
“You don’t even laugh, when I put ugly things on though!,” he complained. 
“Because you don’t look funny, you look good in everything!,” you said a little too loud, two teenage girls stared at you and then at Jin, who was smitten by the compliment he had lured out of you. 
“Really? You think so? So I can buy the sunglasses from the last store?,” he blushed a little, as if you never fought.
“No, not those. Those were just ugly.”
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Yoongi
It was a first that he asked you to go shopping. He always ordered online, never got out to actually try things on and buy them. You were excited that you would walk around in the mall, maybe grab some coffee and hold hands the whole time.
But of course, that didn't happen. Yoongi rushed into the basic section in h&m and grabbed the same white and black shirts, he owned.
"I need new ones and delivery is taking too long," he plainly said and walked to check out already. You didn't follow him though, picked up bright pink and green shirts in his size. When he finally noticed your absence he walked back.
"Let's go," he told you and waved with his hands. You simply shrugged your shoulders and looked for matching hats. "We have no time," he rushed you, but still grabbbed the pieces out of your hand.
"You have nothing to do, let's go on a date," you whined when he put the clothes back," Hey, I wanted to buy them for you!"
"As if I would wear that." He held up the green shirt from earlier. It wasn't exactly his style, but he bored you with his all black outfits sometimes.
"Then I'm not coming."
"Sure, stay here then," he only responded. You sometimes acted as if you didn't know your boyfriend, of course he would leave you behind.
"Buy me at least some coffee!" He finally nodded at that, and grabbed the pink shirt last second. "You can wear this," he said and went to pay.
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Hoseok
He would end up being poor one day. His clothes were just so expensive, you didn't understand how his heart didn't hurt paying these prices. My hands would shake at least, you thought. But no, Hoseok paid without even grimacing a little. Rather, he smiled.
"I finally have every color," he said happily and hugged the huge bag with shoes. The shoes that costed him a frw hundred dollars, but were kind of ugly in your opinion. Not that you would tell Hoseok. The shoes looked like from a different century and used, but Hoseok just had to have them.
"I have an idea where to shop next!" His preference reminded you of an old thrift shop, you saw a few days ago. This way maybe he would save some money, but still get some clothes he liked.
He couldn't complain, even though he wanted to explore other overpriced boutiques, because you always followed him quietly. "Okay, let's go." But he couldn't hide his shock, when he saw the sign of the shop.
"Trust me," you assured him. And you were right, after the shock disappeared, Hoseok found his new paradise. The oversized jackets looked like some designer clothes and there were the most extraordinary sunglasses and hats on display.
"Babe, I found heaven. And only paid 500." Yes, he still spent hundreds, but at least for a lot of pieces. But he would learn, for sure.
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Namjoon
What does the author want to say in these lines? You suddenly remembered those words from school, when you looked at the pieces Namjoon picked in his favorite store. He thought of fashion as a way to express himself, but did he really need every color of the spectrum in such a tiny space? The shirt was weird, a little off from his usual style, but Namjoon still stared at it. 
“Are you sure you like the design or the designer?,” you asked him when the owner of the shop left you two alone. He and Namjoon were besties. Well, anyone would be besties with Joon, when he left hundreds there every week for pieces that looked like it was done in five minutes. On drugs. 
“It will look great with the pants I bought last month.” It was shocking how Namjoon remembered every thing he bought. He would suddenly mention hats or shoes from last year and style them. When he was passionate about something, he was unstoppable. 
“I don’t think it looks great,” you repeated yourself. Maybe you were tired or just not as brave as he was with fashion. But Namjoon insisted on his purchase, and told you to wait for the outfit. 
And he was right. Mixed with dull colors, the shirt was almost really really good. It wasn’t as eyecatching as you remembered it, it matched his body and skin color. 
“You should trust me more,” he said, when he catched you admire his outfit,”Soon, I’ll style you as well.”
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Jimin
It’s a well know fact, that Jimin was the gentleman of all gentlemen. So shopping with him was just a dream. He was that kind of boyfriend, that took your purse without a word, paid for everything, still allowed you to buy coffee or little things, so you didn’t feel bad, and always complimented you. Even when you looked just aweful. But as he was a bad liar, you understood. And tortured him for lying so obviously.
“Really? I don’t look fat in this dress?” You turned around and watched him closely. The fit was a catastrophe. The fabric hugged all the wrong places and made it look like you were swollen and pregnant. 
“You could never look fat, love,” he replied and tried to look horrified about your question. Or maybe he was horrified of your looks and didn’t fake that one.
“Are you sure, so I can wear this to your parent’s place?,” you wanted to corner him into saying the truth.
“This weekend?,” he asked and avoided your eyes,”I heard it’s gonna be cold that day, maybe you should pick something else.” 
“No way, it’s perfect if you think I look okay.” You then walked into the fitting room, to pick out the jacket that was just as ugly as the dress. “I’ll wear it like this, if I get cold.” And with that move, the boy broke down.
“Okay, I give up, you look terrible,” he confessed, defeated by your outfit.
“Be honest with me,” you took the jacket off with a shudder,”One day I won’t realize and walk around like a pig or something.”
“A pretty pig at most.” 
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Taehyung 
The best advertisement was this boy. He didn’t even have to wear the things yet, people just followed him into stores. And when he tried something on, they believed that they could look as good as he did. Many were probably surprised, as the clothes turned into potato sacks at home, when it looked so elegant on Taehyung. 
So obviously every designer wanted to work with him. But he still insisted on walking around in unknown indie stores, looking for gems. He made the same face as he did in galeries, looking for art pieces for his room or collection. Fashion was also art to him. 
“At this point, you should do your own clothing line,” you said, when you left a boutique. Taehyung was pretty close with the designer, they always discussed the next collections and Taehyung always let them do alterations he had in mind. They should credit him as a co-designer, you jooked sometimes.
“But it’s easier this way,” he admitted with a grin,”And I like one-of-a-kind pieces way too much, to produce something for others.”
“What a selfish man,” you teased him,”You are just too scared, that everything will be sold out, and you can’t wear it anymore, right?”
“How can you know me that well?,” he teased back. 
“But think about it, I bet you will be happy to see people wear your designs. It’s like producing songs... for the body?” A light bulb lit up inside his head. 
“This is why I love you and your one-of-a-kind mind.”
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Jungkook
"If the next piece you pick up is grey sweats, I'm screaming," you threatened Jungkook. His arms were already full with grey or black sportswear, but he didn't stop eyeing the same exact things again. You didn't understand how he still found joy in shopping, when he bought the same thigs over and over again.
"I wasn't going to," he scoffed and changed directions. Yea, sure. He walked into a section, you never dreamed Jungkook to walk in. He would never go in there by himself, so he looked awkward. His eyes wandered between different button ups, and he suddenly looked lost and tired.
"White suits you," you helped him out. He walked over to the corner with white clothes and touched a few pieces. “This one,” he murmured with his tongue between his teeth, as he was stuggling with the other clothes in his hands. You helped him pick out the one he wanted. It was a pretty basic button up, with thin grey lines. 
“It looks like the one you wore last week,” he confessed quietly. It made you blush, that he remembered that, and you immediately regretted threatening him earlier. 
“You won’t look as good as me though,” you tried to hide your shyness. 
“I never could.” You turned into a tomato with his comment, but as he didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable, he added, “Well, you could never look that good in sportswear like me either, babe.” 
“Yes, yes, we all have styles that match us better, but variety is always good, right?” 
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purplesurveys · 5 years
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SEVEN DEADLY SINS
Sin 1: Lust 1. Who was the last person you checked out? Did they check you out too? Surprise surprise, it’s my girlfriend. Yeah she did - I think I’d start worrying if she didn’t, lmao.
2. Who was the last person you desired, but they didn’t feel the same? Gab, at one point. Other than her, I haven’t desired anybody else; but I was on the ‘didn’t feel the same’ side at least once, back when Mike used to like me.
3. Ever cheated on a significant other? If so, have you learned from it? No, I’ve never cheated.
4. Do you watch porn? Yes. I’d have phases where I’d view it 2-3 times a week, then I’d completely stop for months – kinda like how everyone plays The Sims lol. I don’t know why it works like that for me.
5. Do you masturbate? Sometimes.
6. Best physical features on your preferred sex? I don’t have a preferred sex, and my favored features differ per person.
7. Who are some celebrities that you think are totally hot? Kristen Stewart, if you don’t me already haha. Also Eugene Lee Yang from the Try Guys, Beyoncé, and Jennifer Aniston.
8. Did you ever lust after a best friend’s significant other? How did it turn out? Mmm nope, I never found myself attracted to Hans in any way. The fact that he has always been associated with Angela ever since high school also helps.
9. When was the last time you had sex? Like a week before Christmas, I think.
10. Ever pursued someone, even though they were taken? No, that’s a little awful.
Sin 2: Gluttony 1. When did you last eat at a restaurant? What restaurant was it? Last Monday – Gab and I went to Yabu to catch dinner. We had been entertaining my mom’s guests and their kid all day and thought we couldn’t leave the house cos it’s a bit impolite, but I had such a craving that I ended up asking permission if we can go to Yabu by 8:30 even though the mall closed by 9 lol. I realize I talk about Yabu an awful lot on here so for those who wanna know, it’s this local Japanese place that serves theeeee best katsu.
2. When did you last have fast food? Where did you get it? I don’t actually remember. If I’m not wrong, it was around two or three weeks ago, and we had KFC delivered to our house because we were too lazy to cook or go out. I had the Zinger Steak, which I hope they never phase out because it’s insanely good.
3. What was the biggest meal you had all day? I haven’t eaten yet, and it’s only 10:51 AM. 
4. Do you have too many clothes? How often do you go shopping? I wouldn’t say it’s overwhelmingly many, but I definitely own more clothes than the pieces I’d usually wear, and that’s because I don’t like throwing old stuff out just in case I’d need them in the future (definitely got my great-grandma’s hoarding tendencies). I go shopping once in a few months, which in itself is pretty seldom, but that’s because when I go shopping I usually already buy a shit-ton of new clothes, enough for me to be able to mix and match to come up with new outfits for the next few weeks.
5. What’s something you have a LOT of? Black clothing. I’ve made an effort to get more colored tops, but the blacks still overpower.
6. Do you eat a lot? I’m very takaw-tingin, which is a Filipino term used when you get a crapload of food either because you’re hungry or because you’re confident you can finish it – or both – then you never do. Takaw means greedy or glutton, tingin roughly means sight, so it literally means that you just kinda want to get everything because it looks like a lot. So to answer the question, I always feel like I can eat a lot, but at the end of the day I just end up with stomachaches and I never learn.
7. What was the last thing you splurged (spent a lot of money) on? If a bunch of stuff counts, then I splurged on Christmas presents for various people that I all bought in one go – I got massage oils, a garlic press, a frisbee, Marikina sandals, lipstick, and Instax film. If you’re talking about a single thing that I had to drop a ton of money on, it was for my dog’s blood test and some arthritis meds that the vet recommended.
8. What do you spend most of your money on (besides bills and anything necessary like that)? I only ever spend on necessities like gas, clothes, and food, honestly. Other than that... I spend on (and this is very seldom) whatever hobby I’m into at the moment. At one point I spent on slime because I got interested in them, and before that – and y’all know about this – I spent my Christmas savings on adult coloring books and pencils.
9. Last time you ate candy? What was it? A week or two ago; I had a Crunch bar.
10. Last thing you ate too much of? Eggs, I think. My mom makes it for breakfast so I have it almost every day.
Sin 3: Greed 1. Do you share things? How often? Yeah I can be pretty generous with my stuff. I know I’d appreciate it when other people lend me their belongings, so I try to do the same. I once lent my phone to Rita for over an hour just because she wanted to play Mario Kart, and I also lent a book that’s really important to me to an online friend I barely knew; it was with him for like two years, lol.
2. Someone asks you for a piece of your cookie. You break it in half, but the pieces aren’t equal. Who gets the bigger piece? Usually it would be me; but if the person who asked for it was Gab, or if that particular person likes the cookie I have, then they get the bigger piece.
3. When you see change on the ground, do you pick it up? Only if it’s a 10-peso coin, because I’m greedily picky like that lmao. Other people might need a peso or a 5-peso coin more, so I leave it be.
4. How often do you lend money to people? I don’t, and that’s one thing I wouldn’t tend to lend. My parents just give me allowance and it’s usually enough for necessities and for treating myself once or twice a week, so I wouldn’t be able to have some left for others. Besides, that’s my parents’ money and it would be pretty fuckin’ unfair to them if I just give it away to others lmao.
5. Do you loooove money? I hate what it’s done to society, how it’s divided the rich and the poor, and how the people with the most money also tend to be the most selfish coughcoughBILLIONAIREScoughcough. But I love spending for my own, hah.
6. If someone offers to pay for you, do you decline or readily accept? Oh no no no. Decline all the way. If they keep insisting then I’ll probably give in because it’s the polite thing to do, but if I can, I’ll keep declining.
7. Which of your friends is the wealthiest? Rita. Her grandpa is a former senator and she lives in literally the swankiest neighborhood in Metro Manila; I was a bit intimidated when she invited us to her place for the first time lol. She’s the simplest person I know, too; and that’s my favorite kind of rich.
8. Would you take a high-paying job that you didn’t really like just for the money and benefits? That’s definitely what I plan to do, lmao. At least this is how I know myself now: I have enough money to buy whatever I want, and I’m a happy camper. That may change in a few months or within the next year and I may eventually wanna search for a passion – but for now, it’s the mindset I’m going with when I go job-hunting soon. If I survived four years of college with a very burnt-out, emptied passion for journalism that I thought I had, I could probs do the same in the workplace.
9. Ever stole from anyone? What about stole from a store? What happened? I unknowingly stole a box of crayons from a store back when security equipment wasn’t that rigid yet lmao. I realized I ‘stole’ it because I had it in my hands and not in a paper bag when I walked out, so I immediately went back to pay for it. I’ve never stolen anything from anyone.
10. Do you ever have enough money? I don’t think anyone ever feels this way. Ever heard of billionaires?
Sin 4: Sloth 1. Last thing you procrastinated on? Washing the dishes last night.
2. When you’re at a strip mall and the next store you want to go to is at the other side, do you drive over there instead of take a short walk? It depends how far “the other side” is. <-- Yep pretty much. If it’s literally on the other side of a street, then obviously I’d go walk. But in places like my school which is super big and where ‘other side’ could mean 2 km away, a drive would be more convenient.
3. What’s a typical day off of school and/or work like for you? I’d normally spend the day lazing around on the couch with my dog beside me and lurking around social media.
4. What’s one talent you have that you don’t really work on, even though you have the ability to be good at it? Public speaking, or debating.
5. How many hours of television do you watch a day? I keep Friends as a background noise on Netflix nearly all day because I hate when it gets too quiet around me. As for watching on an actual television, I haven’t used one in years.
6. What about the amount of time you spend on the internet a day? The internet takes up my entire day it’s crazy lol. I kinda need it for everything now.
7. How many hours of sleep do you get a day? Do you sleep in late? It’s always different. I can go anywhere between 3 and 10 hours of sleep. I don’t sleep in often, though.
8. Do you drive to places that are less than three blocks away? I don’t know how big blocks are supposed to be since we don’t use that system here. But yes, I usually drive even though Point A to Point B is very much walkable hahaha. My friends make fun of me a lot for it but I don’t care, at least I don’t get to my destination all sweaty and smelling like the sun.
9. When was the last time you exercised? November, on my last PE class.
10. Ever copied and pasted your homework from a website on the internet? I never did this. My schools always emphasized the consequences of plagiarism so as someone who always stuck by the rules, I always made sure I at least paraphrased the content I see on the internet.
Sin 5: Wrath 1. If you could kill one person and get away with it, would you do it? I know it’s pretty dark to come from such a place, but I’ve always thought death is an easy way out for people who’ve done awful things. I could answer this question with a name of a corrupt politician, rapists, or animal abusers, but tbh they don’t deserve the sweet escape of death, even if it were from murder.
2. Is there anyone you honestly and truly can say that you hate? Anybody who has hurt cats and dogs.
3. Is there anyone you want revenge on, whether you want to get them back big-time or just play a little prank on them for hurting your feelings? Like I said, I’d daydream about getting revenge just to satiate my desire for it, but I think it’s pretty childish and downright cartoonish to actually go through with it. I’ve only ever seen people getting petty revenge in movies, but it seems a bit stupid in real life.
4. Are you fighting with any friends right now? Why? No. The most that’s happened was me kinda scolding Andrew for not letting me know beforehand that he submitted our thesis proposal to our prof through VIBER, which is incredibly unprofessional and I definitely let him know what I thought about it. I didn’t fight with him though.
5. Last time you were really angry? What happened? The aforementioned thesis prof letting me know we’re missing a part of our thesis on the last day for profs to submit their grades. That meant that however early we submitted a revision, she wouldn’t have been able to give it a mark anyway. That definitely pissed me off, especially considering that she was silent for two weeks and didn’t give back any comments which made us think we were good to go.
6. When you’re angry, what do you do to calm yourself down? I watch Friends or any one of my favorite YouTubers so I can have some relief. Other times, I’d force myself to sleep.
7. “Hate is just the fear of loving someone.” true or false? No. That makes no sense to me.
8. What’s the best revenge you ever got on someone? Never done this before.
9. Was there any hard feelings after your last break-up? On whose end was it on? There were definitely hard feelings in the beginning because she executed the breakup so poorly and I thought I didn’t deserve any of the treatment I was getting, and I was also mad that I wasted my time for that long only for her to break up with me in the end.
10. Ever been cheated on? How did that make you feel? No.
Sin 6: Envy 1. Is there anyone you’re jealous of? Name a person and tell us why. Envious is the better word, and I feel this way towards anybody who live with both parents. My dad’s worked overseas all my life, and as grateful as I am for his sacrifices, having a dad at home is more foreign sensation to me than the idea of having a dad who’s gone for 4-6 months a year.
2. List three physical features some other people have that you’re envious of (no need to get specific and name people; you can just say something like “brown eyes” or “having perfect eyebrows”). Straight teeth, fixed eyebrows, legs that don’t need much shaving.
3. List three personality features that other people have that you’re envious of. Confidence, independence... is privilege a personality trait lol?
4. Are you a jealous significant other? I can be. I don’t make a big deal about being jealous as much as I did two or three years ago anymore though.
5. Could you date someone who was really jealous? Gab can be a little jealous but for the most part it’s endearing because it’s never turned into abuse.
6. What celebrity’s looks do you envy the most? Audrey Hepburn.
7. Do you think anyone is envious of you? In your opinion, what characteristics (physical and mental) do you possess that you think someone might be envious of? Being in a long-term relationship, definitely. A lot of people my age want significant others so bad, and I know this because a good chunk of them post the same wish over and over on social media lol.
8. What are a few things you wish you were good at? Drawing, playing an instrument, dancing ballet, changing a car tire, COOKING.
9. Did you ever date someone, break up, and then see them dating someone very attractive a few days later? Were you jealous of that person? This has never happened to me.
10. When looking at a love interest’s exes, do you often find yourself jealous of their good-looking exes? I haven’t had to do this, because I was Gab’s first. I wouldn’t want to fixate on exes if I were in a different situation, though.
Sin 7: Pride 1. What’s something you brag about a lot (be honest–we all brag sometimes)? My school is easy bragging rights. Everybody wants to be in UP.
2. What physical features do you take the most pride in? My body figure in general. Also my fingers, legs, and jawline.
3. Are you satisfied with what you have? Yeah but as the above questions have made it clear, I can always use more money lol.
4. Be honest… when someone is telling you something, do you often change the subject so it’s about you and your accomplishments instead? NEVER. That’s one of the worst things anyone can do. I feel like I used to do this when I was younger, then it just hit me one day about how tasteless it can be so ever since then I’ve let other people hype themselves up and be excited about accomplishments or new things in their life as much as they want with me, as long as they aren’t being so conceited.
5. Do you like talking about your achievements? If I’m in a group and we started sharing our achievements then yeah I’d join in. But I wouldn’t bring it up if it wasn’t already being brought up. It’s better to let the accomplishments speak for themselves.
6. Do your parents tend to brag about how well you came out? My mom is definitely more ~braggier than my dad, but she’s never come off as an asshole about it. If she was, I’d pull her aside.
7. Do you strive to be better than others? Do you think competing with others is healthy? I keep a mindset of competing with others, but I keep it internal.
8. What do you do better than most people? See the little details. I’m always surprised at how most of the people I work with just look at the big picture – like how they don’t pay attention to the red squiggle under misspelled words on a group paper (or if they do see it, they don’t do anything about it), or how they don’t seem to care about proper spacing on a Powerpoint and proceed to just dump a bunch of text on one slide. Now this is something I can brag about too, cos a lot of people are just so not detail-oriented lol.
9. Do you believe in taking pride in things you can’t control (ex. being proud of your heritage, being proud of your skin color, being proud of your natural artistic ability)? I don’t see why that’s an issue.
10. Who are you competing with right now (it could be anything–classmates for a grade, co-workers for a position, other girl for a guy, etc.)? There’s no particular person, but like I said, I’m always in this perpetual mindset of wanting to compete with others just so I’m more motivated to perform well and get things done.
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gothmedia · 6 years
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Youtube Drama
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Okay, everyone’s freaking out over the drama going on youtube, but everyone’s just speaking over each other and completely missing any of the points being made. So, since a little clarity is always appreciated, we’re going to go through each point people are making, their misconceptions, and how they effect the subculture at large. 1. I’m too poor to be goth?    A bunch of babybats have come put of the woodwork as of late saying they can’t afford to be goth. By this they tend to mean, they can’t afford to buy name brands such as Killstar or Punk Rave. They can’t afford to put together extravagant outfits and dress that way every single day. They can’t afford limited edition vintage Bauhaus vinyls or regal black velvet thrones to adorn their bedrooms. But do they really need all that? No. You just have to have an appreciation for the subculture and music. That’s it. You don’t need to buy an entire wardrobe worth more than a car. But this sentiment only goes so far. The older goths can’t reach the ears of the new comers as much and so the worry sets in. Heck, I still worry sometimes if I look “goth enough”. But I’ve been in the subculture for over a decade now and I realize that no matter what anyone says online, I’m still going to enjoy Sisters of Mercy and I’m still going to go to events and try to support the local scene. So what if I don’t have expensive clothes? I’m going to enjoy myself anyway. The subculture doesn’t revolve around Killstar’s marketing and that’s one of the reasons “#gothisnotkillstar” came about. (More on that later in the week!) You don’t need Killstar to be goth. You don’t need Punk Rave to be goth. You don’t need Demonia or Tripp or any of these expensive, fancy outfits to be part of a subculture. You are enough. Sure, seeing others post about their wonderfully spooky lives with their wonderfully spooky possessions on Instagram and Youtube is neat, but you have to remember that NO ONE is that way all day every day. Social media is something people curate and have control over. They’re only showing what they want you to see, but they too have to take a break and become a normal person once the camera is off. 2. DIY or Die.    On the other side of things (Though this argument is more rare than the latter), you get people who are completely rejecting the consumerist approach to goth and are telling people that they need to only ever DIY all their clothes and goth completely rejects a fashion orientation at all. Which is also garbage. Yes, Goth is a music based subculture but it did have a strong style influence right from the get-go. Did it always look the way it does now? No, the style evolved over time into it’s own, highly identifiable self. Do you have to look like this 24/7? No, that’s ridiculous. Like hell I’m going to get dressed in a studded vest and custom chain belt to walk a block to the corner store to pick up Tums when my stomach hurts. I don’t even wash my hair to do that. For such a strong stance against name brand fashion, this group sure likes dictating what people should wear, saying DIY or die. I admit, DIY is pretty fun once you learn how to do it and you do truly get unique clothing and accessories out of it, but it does take time and skill. For a lot of the more intensive projects you need to learn how to sew, dye, paint... Sometimes attempts don’t work out like the time I tried to turn black boots red with a spray-on rubber that ended up cracking off. Sometimes materials like lace or studs or chains are expensive, sometimes you can’t find anything good to work with in thrift stores, and sometimes you’re just really bad at sewing. Not everyone has what it takes to DIY. That, however, shouldn’t turn people away from it. DIY is something that takes time to learn, but the process of doing it is really fun! It’s fun creating new and interesting looks, figuring out how to mess with something to make it your own and you end up with a one-of-a-kind piece all your own. But it’s not necessary. You don’t have to have a completely custom wardrobe just like you don’t have to have Killstar.
3. What any of this has to do with Youtube.    So, what does this have to do with Youtube? Well, think of the most popular goth youtubers. You think of two. They’re pretty and very fancy and do a lot of haul videos with brands like Killstar. Is that a bad thing? Yes and no.They are their own people and these are their channels. They can make videos on whatever they want to and no one really has a say in that. Also, if an expensive clothing company sent me a box of free stuff and said, “You can keep this if you make a video,” I’d probably make a video. Everyone likes free stuff. It’s helpful to see some of these brands on actual people, too. I like the fact that neither of these people are a size small. Almost all marketing for brands such as Punk Rave and Killstar are on extra small models and that just isn’t everyone. I want to see how the dress will look on someone who isn’t model thin because I’m not model thin. If these brands advertised with models in a variety of sizes, shapes, skintones, and disabilities then maybe more people could see themselves in these outfits as well, but as it is they don’t and the only way anyone sees something that looks remotely like themselves will be these try-on hauls. But what happens when that’s the epitome of goth youtube? New-comers to the subculture will think that’s what goth in it’s entirety is. I’ve met a few new goths who are like this and were shocked when I said I didn’t own any Killstar. It creates a mind-frame that to be in the subculture you have to buy this one (frankly overpriced) brand and that’s it.    Is this the fault of BlackFriday and Toxic Tears? Sort-of?They’re considered influencers now. They INFLUENCE the younger generation of goths and they influence how people outside the subculture see goth. Sure, they’re popular, but they’re popular because they’re not only watched by goths but also people into fashion and mainstream viewers. They refuse to do anything outside of fashion to avoid fights about music and the “gothier than thou” crowd, but they fail to realize they’re creating these people themselves. There’s a handful of people in youtube comments who go on the pages of lesser known goth youtubers telling them they need to look extreme to be goth and they cite It’sBlackFriday and Toxic Tears as examples of how a goth should look. They also deride the people who delve deeper than the fashion as elitists, a word that’s simply getting out of hand now. If someone wants to talk about the subculture and it’s music you get tons of little gothlings telling them that they’re gatekeeping the subculture and that you don’t have to listen to goth music to be goth. Then they turn around and gatekeep on what name brand clothes others aren’t wearing which is frankly silly. The subculture is more than clothing and you have to dig a little deeper to find other goth youtubers with more than fashion and hauls on their channels. Speaking of hauls, that’s another point of contention. It’s not only that these name brands are all over youtube now, but that they’re being advertised by people in haul videos. In these videos, the youtuber gets sent a large package of free things from the company and is told that they can keep the items if they make a video on it. Good for them, but the viewers are the ones who will be spending money on these items. Yes, the youtubers say their reviews are non-biased, but they were just sent several EXTREMELY expensive pieces of clothing for free. The dress might be nice, but is it $300 nice? Specifically from Killstar, many of their clothing items are similar to those found elsewhere for much cheaper.   How does this get fixed on the web, then? A solution that makes everyone happy. For one thing, influencer youtubers could do a bit more than fashion. It’sBlackFriday used to do really funny skit videos with Mr. Owl back in the day and they are missed. Toxic Tears had two videos for “What not to say to goth girls” and I’d look forward to a third one. Funny videos about the subculture are sorely wanted because now-a-days we take ourselves WAY too seriously for people who look like rejects from Dracula. If they want to keep the fashion spin, they can talk about the history of the fashion as well. Where did all the circus and cabaret themed stuff from the mid 2000s go? I miss it. They can showcase designers and small businesses within the subculture, not just big name fast fashion companies. Places that make truly unique clothes, places that fit all sizes and shapes. They can point goths in the directions of other youtubers/podcasts/blogs that they might learn from. Simply teaching babybats about goth isn’t an elitist thing to do. The newcomers should WANT to learn more if they actually like the subculture. And overall, they need to space out the haul videos. Not only is it making the impression that one needs a five thousand dollar wardrobe on hand at all times to be goth, but it also makes for a really boring playlist. Toxic Tears has started doing some little DIY stuff which is pretty cute and hopefully It’sBlackFriday will do something or other. Perhaps vlogs about goth festivals? I know she’ll be attending one on the other side of the country soon so that should be interesting. This can be fixed, it just needs a little work and it needs us as viewers to stop having such a stick up the ass about what goth should look like. 4. It’s okay to shop at Walmart.    Or Target. Or any regular store at the mall. In fact, I suggest getting all your basics at super cheap places like these. You shouldn’t be breaking bank on a black t-shirt and jeans. You could also go thrifting. I recently found a blazer that I loved in a thrift store. (They also had a Shrine vest for $20! You never know what you might find.) But never feel bad because you got something from a “mainstream” store. Not only are they good for basics, sometimes you can find pieces to practice DIY on (I did this with a vest from Target.) or sometimes they sell something that just speaks to your aesthetic. (Black lace and fishnet were really in last fall season.) It’s okay if you have normal clothes and aren’t goth all day every day. I have a day job where I wear a yellow polo and kakis and sell churros. Am I less goth? No. Some may claim that not being decked out all the time will make me a weekender, but I’m still running this blog and try to contribute to the subculture. But I have bills to pay. I have a cat to feed. Sometimes you have to sacrifice a bit of freedom of expression just to get by and you can get back in black and fall asleep to Thoushaltnot on the way home on the bus. Just don’t worry about it. You don’t need to DIY everything you own. You don’t need to buy name brand boots. You don’t need to be Instagram ready 24/7. Just enjoy the subculture. And maybe look up some of those other youtubers. Angela Benedict has some great storytime videos on drama not partnering to Killstar.
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boyswanna-be-her · 6 years
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I have a crush on you but also LEAK THE SKIN CARE ROUTINE
I really hope you were serious, because this is something I’ve thought a lot about and I am absolutely going to use this ask as an excuse to go into a skin care deep dive.
Here’s a big-ol high-res picture of my mug for you to inspect.
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I pay less than $15 for products that must last at least 3-4 months because I just… don’t have more money than that to throw at this hobby. I’ll link to everything I use and show you the price under the cut.
I only use four of these things below every day–but when I have time, I use as many of them as my skin calls for. I just wanted to show you the whole of my skincare arsenal so as not to be coy about it taking up space and time in my life and routine. It does, and I do work on it.
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I’m 33, white with combination skin, lots of prior scarring from picking, lots of sun exposure (Florida!), and several minor autoimmune issues that impact my skin when my health is poor or stress is high. I am prone to whiteheads and inflamed pimples the week of my period. 
You cannot buy, wash, treat, or hide your way to “perfect” skin. Airbrushed, poreless, whitewashed, glowing, moist, unwrinkled skin is a lie sold to us by makeup and skincare companies. There is no perfect skin–there is only skin. 
But if you personally are unhappy with some aspect of your skin, you can develop habits that make you more comfortable with/proud of/happy with your skin, and that’s what I want to focus on here.
Though good health =/= clear and smooth skin in all cases, I am lucky to report that my skin looks clearer, smoother, and younger now that I’m not just generally near death all the time. The story would be very different if I struggled with, say, lifelong acne, or if I had a chronic health problem that I was not able to manage. 
Skincare is a luxury of time, money, physical storage space, and mental space.
“Good” skin is a myth. Everyone’s skin is good skin. I started doing all of this stuff to my skin because I was dissatisfied with how much it HURT all of the time, and how flaky it was. Acne, scars, “discoloration,” different coloration, birthmarks, big pores, “craters,” uneven textures, dark hairs, thick hairs, skin tags, milia, blackheads, wrinkles, keratosis pilaris, freckles, and moles are all NORMAL skin types/features and don’t need to be “solved” if the possessor is unbothered by them. YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO LOOK HOWEVER YOU WANT. 
I do this stuff because I like it, it helps my mental health to take care of myself with a routine, and it improves my physical quality of life. It helps me with some insecurities, but if that was the only thing it did for me, I don’t think I’d mess with it this much. When I’m not healthy, my skin is prone to deep cracking and flaking. I have always been self-conscious about redness in my T-zone and yellowness around my eyes (dear god, my poor, poor liver).
My skin has objectively cleared and smoothed and plumped up a lot because I smoke less, drink less, stay in mostly humid environments (because, again, Florida!), and have been managing my stress and autoimmune issues. These are all changes made in the last six months. 
On top of those changes, on an average day when I’m actually taking care of myself, I use the following four steps in the order listed, once a day in the morning. I’m realistic that I’ll only do this once a day in the morning and anything more than that is just a boring time suck for me as a person.
1. COSRX Low pH Good Morning Gel Cleanser - 5 oz for $10.70 - one tube lasts me about 6 months. I use this in the morning and just thoroughly wash my face. It’s very mild and has a fresh citrus scent that doesn’t linger.
2. Kikumasamune Skincare Lotion - 17 oz $12.10 - one bottle lasts me 8-10 months. This is a fermented, watery product unlike anything I’d used before. It smells faintly like sake, bananas, and bubblegum (seriously). I decant it out of the big pump bottle into a little travel bottle. I shake a little in my hand and rub it gently over my whole face and eye area. Probably not supposed to do that, but I’m a rebel. It leaves my skin a little tacky.
3. Hada Labo Rohto Hadalabo Gokujun Hyaluronic Lotion Moist - 5.7 oz for $12.99 bottle, then 6.4 oz for $10.90 refill packages - 5 oz lasts me 3-4 months. I’ve honestly forgotten what this even does but it’s a nice, thick liquid, colorless and scentless, and I put it all over my face. Leaves my skin a little less tacky but still not slick/neutral.
4. Ladykin Fresh Strawberry Icing Gel Bar - 6.7 oz for $7.99 - one bottle lasts me about 5-6 months. Someone literally bought this for me as a gag gift because they knew I liked skincare and the bottle is… weirdly obscene. But it turns out that it makes a great moisturizer for me and it’s cheap as hell and smells like fresh strawberries so what’s the down side? 
When I have time or when my skin really needs it, I also use the following products:
SHEETMASKS - Stop buying overpriced sheetmasks one at a time!!!! Leave that aisle at Target alone!!! I know they’re at the dollar store too–leave them alone!!! Those are cool if you’re treating yourself for special occasions, but I try to think of sheet masks as a normal part of my week. That means I’m not going to shell out $3-4 PER MASK if I’m using one or two every week! 
The thing with sheetmasks is, in my totally nonscientific opinion, it doesn’t really matter what kind you use. The value is in plopping a bunch of moisture on your face along with cloth that simply forces that product into your skin. It’s the skin force-feeding concept that works more than the product itself. I think. I have no proof. I have made really moronic assumptions before.
That said, you’ll find ones that you prefer over others. Snail mucin ones don’t absorb nicely for me. Exotic animal-sourced ingredients (bee pollen, royal jelly, donkey milk, goat milk, snake venom, bee venom….) sometimes irritate my skin. Other people LOVE them. 
I get sheetmasks in packages online, at TJ Maxx, and at Marshalls. I try to pay under 75 cents per mask, but lean more towards the 50 cent mark. TJ Maxx and Marshalls are great places to try out new masks–just look at the prices and the mask count and do a little mental math to make sure you’re not getting gouged.
A good place to start if you want to try sheetmasking is with the Dermal brand of sheetmasks (16 masks for $11 (68c/per), 24 masks for $14 (58c/per), 39 masks for $21 (54c/per). They’re basic and generally non-irritating with no scent and a thin formula that feels nice and leaves skin smooth and untacky. This is what I generally keep on hand. 
I have a weird sense-memory thing with ginseng, so I also look out for Esfolio Pure Skin Red Ginseng Essence Mask Sheets. I don’t recommend buying from Amazon, as I am able to find these 10-pack boxes cheaper in person.
If I’m going to use a sheetmask, I put it on after I brush my teeth, wash my face, and put in contact lenses (doing them with glasses isn’t impossible–just messier). Then I make tea and just… do stuff with the dumb sheet mask on until it’s pretty dry (20-30 minutes). Then I take it off and rub the leftover mask on my arms and legs and chest like a weirdo, because it’s still full of product, and then I squeeze the leftover product out of the package and apply it to my face. Because I have the luxury of time but not money, I do NOT waste product.
AQUAPHOR - ~$14 for 14 oz - one tub lasts me through 18 months of travel, winters, and tattoos. Apparently everyone who lives somewhere cold already knows that you need to smother your face in petrolatum when it starts acting up or the weather is cold and dry, but this was shocking news to someone like me who was raised in Southern mall culture skincare routines. When my skin is cracked and bad, Aquaphor legit helps more than my prescription steroid creams. I put as much of it on my face as I can tolerate (it doesn’t smell like anything, but it does make you damned greasy) and then go to bed. Waking up with post-Aquaphor skin is like a miracle sometimes.
MISSHA M Perfect Cover BB Cream SPF 42 - $7.20 for 0.2 oz -  This is a new purchase for me, as my favorite sheer, tinted one-tone-fits-all BB cream has been discontinued. This only comes in six colors, and most of those look like they flatter white and yellow skin–so this option won’t be perfect for everyone. I’m still in search of the perfect replacement BB, but this one works for now. In the picture at the top of this post, I’ve just done my normal 4-step thing and applied about a pump and a half of this BB cream all over my face.
***If you have actively flakey skin, I don’t recommend the MISSHA product as it does emphasize flakes and dry patches. Try COVERGIRL Smoothers Lightweight BB Cream (1.35 oz for $6.19) It won’t discolor and emphasize your flakes, if you get dried out during the day.*** 
I fell into the Korean beauty rabbit hole several years ago with @shrimoishere​ –who has been more consistent about these things and as a result has AMAZING SKIN. If you want to learn more about why this stuff works, and how it could work for your specific skin type, I highly recommend poking around r/AsianBeauty. I spent a ton of time researching products and about two years trying different things to figure out what would work for me. This has been a passive, slow journey, so I don’t think anyone who can afford it and would like to pursue it should feel intimidated by the perceived time suck. It’s just something cool to do in the background.
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Survey #210
“made of flame, made of mud, i’m the many, i’m the one.”
Did your parents live in a different country before you were born? No. Do you have a preferred coffee brand? No. What’s something you’ve experienced that very few others have? Your favorite human on Planet Earth/God Himself noticing you. :') Three days I couldn't sleep. Three. Days. Do you have to wear an identification badge at your job? I don't have a job, yet. Have you ever dated someone who was terrible with money? No. If so, how did it affect the relationship? N/A How often do you paint your nails? Never. Do you know anyone who’s related to a current or former world leader? I'm related to Queen Victoria somehow. Idk about anyone else. Do you do your own taxes, or do you hire a professional? No job, no taxes yet. What is something you don’t have any natural talent for? Mathematics. Has anyone ever told you that you get too competitive over minor things? No. Do you usually befriend your coworkers, or do you prefer to keep work separate from your personal life? N/A What was the very first thing you ever saved up to buy with your own money? I think Venus. Describe your favorite Christmas ornament. Man, I have a lot. We've accumulated A LOT over the years between me and all my siblings. Mom gets each of us one every year, and she's also kept all the ones we've made throughout school. She's so cute y'all. There is this REALLY damn pretty swirling crystal one with an angel on the top of it I got from my grandmother, that's definitely one of my faves, I've always loved this lil gingerbread dude I made in pre-k, and... idk man, there are truly a lot. What is something you frequently forget? To turn the laundry room light off anytime I go in there at night for Roman's litter scooper or to bring dirty clothes in there. By this point it's like a joke in the house with how much I do it for whatever reason. How do you feel about your body? I hate it. Who is someone you would like to get to know better? Connie, but I respect her privacy. I know you have to be careful online. What’s your opinion on assisted suicide? For it. At what point do you consider a relationship to be ‘long-term?’ Hm, idk, really. A year? What jobs did your parents have when you were growing up? Mom worked with special ed kids at school, she had a job at the hospital doing computer work I can't remember because I was so young, Dad's been a mailman all my life, but he also worked at Lowe's as a carpenter I think for a while. Do they still have these jobs? Or different jobs? Or have they retired? Mom's got a totally different job, and I already mentioned Dad being a mailman. Do you have any recurring dreams? Themes, yes; dreams, no. Have you ever had to call 911? Why? Yes; Mom and I thought she was having a heart attack. Terrifuckingfying morning. Do you get out a lot? I might as well be on fucking house arrest. I can stay in the house and go nowhere for over a week. Do you eat a lot of vegetables? No. Last fast food you ate? I had a Hardee's biscuit for breakfast. Do you live in Canada? No. What do you think when you see two members of your preferred sex kissing? It's sweet, and brave considering the assholes of the world. Is that hot? "For fuck’s sake… It bothers the hell out of me when people fangirl over homosexual couples. It’s so disrespectful." <<< THIS. Would you ever want to be a chef? No. Bonfires: Y/N? They're fun. What’s a food that’s famous in your hometown/state/country/etc? Southern cooking, like fried chicken, mashed potatoes, hushpuppies, pulled pork, nasty shit like that. By pure coincidence, I literally hate almost all the "traditional" Southern foods. When’s that last time you saw snow? January this year. I think it was January... What’s something that you think will become obsolete in the next 50 years? Physically driving cars, probably. Are you efficient or do you procrastinate a lot? I procrastinate all to hell. Who are the 3 people you love the most? Mom, Sara, and then... idk if I can pick #3. Last person you slept in the same bed with? Sara. When was your first kiss? March 2012. Have you recently been sick? No. What song are you listening to? "Break My Mind" by dAGAMES. Would you marry someone if they were unable to have sex? Yeah. Have you ever made a boyfriend or girlfriend cry? Sadly. Does heartbreak really feel as bad as it sounds? It's worse. Weed, coke, crack, heroin, oxy, acid, x, k, peyote, mushrooms, opium…How many of these have you tried? I have no clue what like three of these even are lmao. None. How long has it been since you had sex? Like over three years. Who was the last person to call you babe? Probably Sara. Last reason you went to the ER? My sister got in a wreck. Were you a planned pregnancy for your parents? I believe so. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth? Yeah. When was the last time you shaved your legs? It's been many months. My legs are AWFUL, but it is an absolute chore to shave or use Nair because my hair is so long and thick. So I figure if there's very little/no chance someone's going to see my legs, why even do it. I really wanna get laser hair removal on my legs when I can afford it, though. What facial cleanser do you use? A Biore charcoal scrub. If someone wanted to know what you smelt like, what should they smell? I don't know? Probably dogs, lmao? How many purses do you own? One I use, then I have... two or three old ones saved just because I really like them. What are your top five favorite stores to clothes shop? Hot Topic, Rebel's Market, Spencer's, rue21, and... idk. I guess Wal-Mart lmao. What kind of clothes do you mostly wear? Yoga/dance/sweatpants with a tank top, graphic tee, or band tee. What about shoes? Flip flops like, year-round lol. If I do wear something else for whatever reason, it'll probably be my Vans or maybe a pair of Converse. Have you ever cheated on the significant other that you have now? No. For that one week a month, do you hate being a woman? Nah, birth control's made cramping a far smaller problem. Last thing you bought at the mall? Wow, I have no idea. Well... maybe a book before the hurricane to read if the power went out? I haven't read it if you're wondering, aha... Do your parents like your boyfriend/girlfriend? Yeah. Dad's met her once, but he seemed to enjoy her just fine, and Mom adores her. What store did you last buy clothes from? Wal-Mart. Which parent are you more similar to? I have traits aligning with each of them. I think my mom, but then again, I don't see my dad nearly enough to know his personality deeply since he changed IMMENSELY after the divorce. Have you ever been to another country’s capital city? No. What are some of your favorite qualities for another person to have? Compassion, wisdom, an open mind, gentle, passionate, a good sense of humor... What smell reminds you of your childhood? Chlorine, I guess. I swam a LOT as a kid; it was my favorite activity. Are you happy with who you are? In some ways, in some ways no. Do you ever sleep with your bedroom windows open? No; we live beside a busy road, and plus I don't trust people. Have you ever had a job where you didn’t fit in with your coworkers? No. What was the last word document you typed? I made a brief outline of the message I'm sending to the client who hired me for her wedding when I send her her pictures. Thanking her and telling her what more I could do for her, stuff like that. What’s something that has upset you lately? The extreme difficulty of finding a job for myself... Do you have a home security system? No, but damn do I want one. What’s something you don’t think people take seriously enough? If you know the darker part of my photography, roadkill. People see it and either think 1.) "poor thing" or 2.) "dumb thing," and that's it. No one seems to truly consider our responsibility to watch for animals on the road; in most instances I've seen, the animal is blamed for being "stupid." No, they're fucking terrified and panicking. Anyway, I'm going on a tangent. Basically, I think we should feel far more pity for what we end, even though it's accidental. And get out of the fucking car to see if it's okay/can be saved. Have you ever gotten sick from someone else’s cooking? I believe so, but I don't really blame the cook. My stomach is just REALLY sensitive to food it's not used to, particularly fancier meals. What was the last kind of cheese you ate? American. How young is too young to be sexually active? "Personally, I think anything under 18." <<< Same. Would you ever dye your hair silver? I wanted to at some point, but particularly with my hairstyle now, idk how good it'd look. What was the last fun thing you did? Shot a wedding. Have you ever dated someone who had a child from a previous relationship? No. Is there any drama currently going on with your family? No. What’s your favorite kind of soup? I'm not a fan. Do you know anyone who practices Hinduism? No. How long was your longest relationship? Three and a half years. When was the last time you spoke to the first person you ever kissed? February 2017. What’s a political issue you have a strong opinion on? Gay rights. What snacks do you like to get at the movie theater? Just popcorn is fine. If I have any candy, it's from a gas station or dollar store. Movie theater prices are expensive as fuck. Have you ever stayed in a hotel in the center of a big city? No. What was the last fruit or vegetable you chopped/sliced up? Romaine lettuce for my iguana. When you take a nap, do you nap in bed or on the couch? In bed. Do you have any friends you have never gotten into an argument with? Yeah, Connie. Girt and I have also never really had an argument, he's just said things that hurt me as his sense of humor can be a bit harsh and they were sensitive areas, but he's never meant it. Do you think you could survive living by yourself for a month? No. Can you cook anything other then toast? Yeah. How many times have you cried over the last person you cried over?  I don’t remember the last person that I cried over. Have you ever been in an on-and-off relationship? So annoying right? No. Have you ever developed a crush on someone the first day you met them? I don’t think so. Have you ever been with someone who was really clingy? Did it annoy you? For only two weeks. I like to pretend that shit never happened. Is there a store you go to so much the employees know your name? The tattoo/piercing parlor I go to know me well; some probably remember my name. Do you have any friends who never shut up about their boyfriend/girlfriend? One literally only talks to me if she wants to ramble endlessly about him. Have you ever helped someone while they were drunk puking? No. There is NO way I could be with someone while they're vomiting. The sound would make me join in, and that's almost a promise. What annoys you more to do, sneeze or cough? Cough. Would you rather have a pet snake or a pet cat? I want another snake. Do you fall for all the lines about making guys/girls like you on magazine covers? Lmao yeah right. Do you have a calendar in your room? What’s it’s theme? My door is currently open so I can't see for sure, but I have three or four outdated meerkat calendars as decoration. Have you ever gotten anything racist about you yelled at you? No. Does the last person whose house you were at like anyone? She's married, so obviously. Do you own more pink or black clothes? Just about everything is black. Has a boyfriend/girlfriend ever given you a stuffed animal? Yeah. What does the last body wash you used smell like? I think it's some kind of ocean-y scent? I don't pay attention. I just know it's blue. What is the worst name anyone has ever called you? A martyr, and not the good kind. Where is your favorite place to eat out? Sonic. Does it bother you when people call you ‘ma'am’ or 'sir?’ No. That's general good manners in the South. Have you ever been obsessed with a television character? I don't think so, but maybe? What was the last thing that changed your life completely? Recovery. Do you have any step siblings? One. I don't call him my brother, though. Did you partake in senior skip days? HA I sure did. Have you ever read the Christian Bible? Not the entire thing. When the holidays come around, do you help decorate? Yeah. Has someone ever promised not to leave you? NEVER IN YOUR FUCKING LIFE BELIEVE THAT SHIT. Do you have a part-time job? No. Are you the type of person who likes to buy gifts for your friends? If I had my own money, I absolutely would. Hopefully I can when I have a job... though I don't exactly have many people to send anything to. Have you ever lived in an apartment before? I wasn't an actual resident, though I was pretty much always there. Have you ever been questioned by the police? No. Are you close to your parents? Yeah. Have you ever had to be put on medicine for a mental disorder? For most of my life. Have you ever been responsible for someone’s death? Wow, no. Do you ever spend the night with your significant other? Well, we're long distance. We do when we visit each other. Do you know a lot about serial killers? No. Have the police ever been looking for you? Ha ha yes, but only because my sister, friend, and I went walking on the beach at night, and apparently Mom didn't hear us when we told her we were going... Have you ever been in a car accident? Yes. Do you cuss more than any one else you know? Tbh probably lmao. How old is your youngest cousin? I don't know. Do you tend to talk on the phone a lot? No. Have there ever been any serial killers around your hometown? I don't believe so. When was the last time you went to a museum? When my brother and nephew were here early this month. Do you know how to shoot a gun and hit a target? No. What turns you on the most? Don't grab my boobs. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? Yes. Do you answer the phones at your work? N/A What’s your ring tone? The Revaleso remix of "Dear Insanity" by Asking Alexandria. The text alert sound is the chime of picking up a gem in Spyro. Do you want to fix anything with anyone? Yeah. Did you wake up in the middle of the night last night? I do literally every night. It sucks. What shows do you watch? None. Do you know anyone who has been arrested? Yes. When you were in elementary school, did you change best friends a lot? No. Have you ever suspected anyone of cheating on you? No. Who was the last person to give you a ride somewhere? My VR counselor drove me home the other day. What’s the scariest bug you’ve ever seen? I'm sure some kind of beetle. Not a fan of beetles. What was your favorite TV show you watched as a kid? Pokemon. :') How many times a day do you tell your parents you love them? Mom, at least once when she leaves for work. Dad, I barely ever see him, so. I don't daily. Ever talk to your pets? Of course I do. I talk to them like I talk to people. Do you think it’s alright if people baby talk to babies? ... Yes???? At a certain age you need to set an example to talk correctly, as the kid is going to copy you, but as a baby, no shit it's fine? Ever take a nap in a hammock? I may have fallen asleep, maybe not. Probably not tho 'cuz I would've been afraid of bugs (the hammock was between two trees directly outside the woods in our backyard), so I've likely just dozed for a bit, if anything. Who’s the best character in Rugrats? Oh boy, I don't remember them all. I know I liked Tommy, but I mean, he was the main character, so I guess that's to be expected for a little kid, mostly seeing him. Ever get caught doing something naughty with your boyfriend/girlfriend? No. Who has had the biggest impact on your life? Jason. Girls: ever wear boxers? Guys: ever wear a thong? No. Do you use q-tips to clean your ears? DON'T DO THAT. I got wax adhered to both eardrums because I did that frequently; it inevitably pushed things back and dried onto them. NOT fun getting it sucked out; hurts like a bitch. Always only use them for the outside of your ears. This has been a PSA. Ever want to make out with someone, anyone, didn’t matter who? No. Ever had your feelings hurt when you knew the person was joking? That is EASY, friendo. Do you make jack-o-lanterns during Halloween? Sometimes. Have you ever swam with dolphins? No. Cats, awesome pets or Satan in disguise? I love cats. When you buy/receive new clothes, do you instantly wear them or wash first? Wash them. Do you hate using public restrooms? VERY MUCH. I will avoid using one at almost all costs. What’s the weirdest item you’ve seen for sale on Ebay? Oh my fucking god. So one night my friend Chelsea and I were up REALLY late and were loopy as fuck and this bitch started looking up weird dildos and shit and I'm not even remotely kidding, she found a huge 50 lb. butt plug. I sincerely wish I was joking. Do you check to make sure there’s TP before using the restroom? Yeah. Do you drunk dial/text? I've never been drunk. Have you ever built a massive snow fort? No. We don't get enough snow here. Are parents to blame for what their kids do on the Internet? Not entirely. Do you use acronyms to remember things? I did in school. Do you take pills like Tylenol for the littlest aches and pains? No. When was the last time you went rollerskating? WOW I don't know, but it's been a long time. Do you call people “dude” a lot? Yes. Who was your favorite Ninja Turtle? I was never into them. Horror flicks make you: laugh, scream, or squirm? Out of those, I may ever only squirm at nasty shit. If you could become a doctor, what would you specialize in? Probably ophthalmology (eye doctors). The last time I went to the eye doctor, I got way too into the science and anatomy of the eyes and such. You woulda thought I saw God when I realized I could see the veins in my eyes during that "lemme shine this light straight into your eyes" tests; I thought it was SO cool. Well, I probably realized this at previous appointments, I just didn't remember. Hm, or maybe a pathologist, that'd be cool. I'm looking through a list of doctors, yes. What’s the cutest thing a little kid has ever said to/in front of you? Probably just "I love you" and stuff like that from my niece and nephew. Ha ha aw, wait... When my brother and older nephew were here, Christian exclaimed, "She's up!", like the MOMENT I moved in bed one morning. I'm so happy to say that kid loves me. He wore me the HELL out in the course of just three days, but man, I miss the lil dude now. That occasion in particular just really sticks out to me because I do not find myself good with kids, and to just hear how excited he was that I was up meant the world to me. Apparently I was fun enough. At what age do you plan on moving out? I hope in like... two more years, maybe less. I need a stable job, a car, but I also DO NOT want to live alone, so I'd want to wait until Sara was ready to move, too. I'm beyond thankful Mom isn't rushing me in the least, she seems happy I live here actually, but I don't want to be in her hair much longer nonetheless. I have to be an adult. Did any characters from TV shows scare you as a kid? Which one(s)? King Ramses from Courage the Cowardly Dog fuck-ing TERRIFIED me. His animation was unique to what was normal in the show, so that automatically stood out as different and weird, but more than anything, I was just so scared by his voice and repetitive lines. I had nightmares of that shitlord. HA HA OH MAN I REMEMBER THIS TOO: When I visited my aunt and uncle's when I was little, my family slept on the floor in a room downstairs, and there were small trees outside the window that would sway, and the outline on the curtains would make me think of him. I remember waking Mom up one night about it, and I think she gave me something for comfort, but idr what. What’s the saddest thing you’ve heard on the news recently? In my very own fucking state, consent can no longer legally be revoked when sex begins. Fuck this place. How long does it take before you trust a person? It depends on the person. It's usually a while, though. Have you ever made a time capsule? What did you put in it? Hm... I feel like I have? Wait yeah, I did in elementary school! It was a class effort. Idr where it was buried. What would you do if your mom or dad read your diary/journal/blog? My mother would be deeply concerned that my love of Mark runs as deep as it does, meanwhile my dad would be v v v confused. They would mutually be very worried of their daughter's willingness to eradicate the fools of the population and replace them all with miniature Fischfucks. Do you know anyone with a lisp? I may? I don't exactly have a lisp, but in certain words, I pronounce "s" weakly due to my tongue piercing getting in the way, but it's very mild. If you were to break a Guinness Record, which one would you try and beat? Idk. What’s the coolest item in your room? I'm not sure, I find a lot of things in here particularly cool for various reasons. Hence why it's so heavily decorated. I guess my favorite is probably the Japanese, limited edition Silent Hill: Revelation flyer I have framed on the wall. I won it in a giveaway and I love it alskdjfklajwer. I wanna collect more SH merch, man. Are you accident-prone? Yes, due to my own lack of common sense and clumsy nature. As a kid, what was your favorite activity on the playground? I BOLTED for that swing. Are huge muscles gross or sexy? I'm not a fan of extreme muscles. Have you ever fished and caught something weird? Phew, I grew up fishing all the time with Dad. I'm certain I have. Well, I caught a catfish by the eye, but only the method's weird there, lol. I still to this day feel so bad for the fella. Is old age catching up with you? In my back and knees lmao. Can you sleep through thunderstorms? Yes. Ever spent the night in a tent? Yes. Do people confide in you? Some do. Ever been around someone who makes you feel stupid? He doesn't intend to, he's just reeeaaally fucking smart. Actually, that goes for my brother, too. I knew he was very intelligent, but holy shit, when he was here last and I actually got to hear more about him, his beliefs, and general knowledge, dude's a genius. How many college degrees do you want? Either up to Bachelor's or Master's. For my career goal of being an out-in-the-field zoologist, I need the latter. Do you like animals? SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have you ever written anything longer than 10 pages? Yes; my high school senior project was at least one. There's other personal stories I wrote as a kid, too. Can you snap your fingers? Yes. Can you wink? My right eye, yes. I can with my left eye, but not without my face distorting pretty badly. What song explains how you feel about love? *shrugs* Does hardship make a person stronger? It depends on what they take from it. What comes to mind when you think of pregnancy? Ew please never. Have you ever attended a professional sporting event? Yeah, hockey games with Dad. What is your favorite brand of clothing? I don't have one. Which do you value more, intellect or work ethic? Work ethic. How well do you know the people you live with? Well, I live with my mom, who I've lived with my whole life, and we're very close, if that answers the question. Do you have any heroes? *blinks* Ever been to a cabin on a mountain? No, I wish. Ever lost your voice? At least once. Are you a cautious person? Yes. Meet Anxiety, baby. Do you enjoy comedy shows? Yeah. Do you chew gum? Sometimes, rarely. Do you think a lot when taking a shower? Not really. I just enjoy whatever music I have on. Are you currently charging your phone? No. Do you ever get razor rash? No. Are you a private person? It depends on the subject. If you straighten your hair, do you always use hair spray? N/A Do you curl your hair often? It's too short to be curled. What’s the earliest you’ve ever woken up for school? Idk. Probably around 5:00-5:30 if I was getting ready for a special day or something. Can you get ready in under 10 minutes? Yeah. Has anyone ever told you that you were a bad kisser? No. Do you like Frostys from Wendy’s? Hell yeah. Would you ever sleep in the same bed as your sibling? Sure, if we had no other choice. Ever taken a shower with someone? My little sister and I did all the time as kids, I'm guessing to save water. Would you consider yourself to be a creative person? Yes. Do you usually take a nap during the day? Yes, usually. Might you enjoy hanging out in the woods for day or two? HELL YEAH!!!!!! So long I have my camera and company, that'd be awesome!!! Do you suffer from frequent paranoia? Eh, not as badly as I used to. Two friends whom have been there for you the most? Sara and Girt. If you/your gf became pregnant accidentally, would you consider abortion? If it was my own fault for not using protection, I couldn't do it; then that's my own foolishness. I would regardless if my life was endangered, though. I do believe abortion is killing a living being once brain activity begins, but I believe in the right to put yourself first. If a complete stranger picked a fight with you, would you fight or flight? Flight if possible. Defend myself when necessary. Have you ever decided to set fire to something out of anger? No. Would you rather be a house pet or a wild animal? House pet, so long as my owner is a good one that truly loves me. Wild animal would be much more dangerous, and besides, I like the idea of companionship. Can you juggle more than two objects at once? lol I probably couldn't even juggle two. Can you function well on little to no sleep? Eh. I'm cranky for sure, but I can function. Well... depending. If I am REALLY tired, I won't be able to keep my eyes open. Do you find that it is difficult to maintain your mood? Even on medication, I'm still bipolar (not using that as an adjective; I'm legitimately diagnosed with it). My mood can change VERY quickly with tiny stimuli, but at a much, much milder degree. Have you ever listened to a group of chanting Monks? (if not you should) No, but it's cool! Two sports that you are horrible at? Tennis and volleyball. The latter mostly just hurts like a bitch. One thing that you would like to change about your life? My job situation. What was the last candy you ate? Sour gummy worms. Which decade was your favorite for fashion trends? Idk. I'm really not educated enough on what was trendy for each one. Do you like the current fashion trends? I pay no attention. Who is the strangest (or one of the strangest) person you’ve met? I won't give away his name as it's a pretty unique one, but there was a kid in high school who was certainly different in both good and bad ways. He was pretty unstable. Made his own religion. What are you struggling with currently? Finding a mfckn job. Do you forgive yourself for your mistakes? Most, I'd say. Have you ever been abused by a police officer? No. Name one friend who had a parent who was in jail. A cousin of mine. Has anyone tried to kill you and then played the victim? No? What is your favorite board game? I like Battleship and Scrabble. Can you remember the last time you played a board game? A few months back with Sara and Girt. Actually Scrabble, lol. List three traumatic memories you have. The only truly traumatic memory I have is the breakup. Well, I guess a nightmare I had with my dad kinda is too, seeing as it still affects my trust today? Have you ever been misdiagnosed with something by a bad doctor? Yup. How the fuck did I have ADHD, woman. If you don’t mind my asking, when was the last time you had diarrhea? Like about two weeks ago before my period started. That's starting to seem like a theme. Do you prefer sunny days or cloudy days? I like partly cloudy. Do you have a painful past? A good chunk of it. But I mean, who doesn't have some rough paths behind them. What was the best time of your life? Walking through Chicago with Sara and her dad one night was INCREDIBLE. Coming from the middle of nowhere into such a colossal city with all these lights and such was such a shock to me, and exploring it with them was super cool. It was cold as fuck, but still, it was fun. When was the last time you were hugged? Idk. Well, probably last time I was at Ashley's saying bye to everyone. Do you trust your doctor? Yes. Name something God has healed you of. HAHAHAHA. If applicable, how old were you when you got "saved?" I was raised into religion, so I don't know. I grew up "saved." Have you been baptized, and if so, where? Yes, at my childhood church.
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kaisooconnection · 6 years
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Happy birthday, Jagiya ❤❤❤
“A necklace? Maybe a bracelet??? Are you sure that you want jewelry, Jongin?” E*XO’s manager asked as he perused the case filled to the brim with shiny, diamond trinkets that were so bright that he needed sunglasses to even look at them. 
“I don’t know....hyung-nim. I want it to be special but...I don’t know what,” he replied in a panicked state. 
“Ok. Stay calm, how about a watch? He never wears a watch. Wouldn’t that work?” the manager asked, trying to soothe the main dancer so that he would  make a decision and he could finally get out of that suffocating shopping mall. 
“Noooooo, hyung! I got him a watch last year. I can’t buy him the same thing again. I don’t know what to do! Help me!” Jongin begged at his wits end.
“Jongin-ah, I have been doing this for four hours already. I have to go and pick up Junmyeon, I don’t have anymore time for this,” the elder said exasperated. 
“But....but!” Jongin replied, fear crawling up under his skin.
“I know that you can’t buy the gift yourself because of everything that’s happened and we don’t want to raise any suspicion but since you don’t know what you want, Jongin-ah, maybe order something online or ask one of the other staff members to grab something tomorrow,” their manager said before hanging up the phone. He was worried that if he let Jongin talk, that the younger would be able to guilt trip him into spending another four hours looking for a gift.
Jongin sighed, throwing the phone onto his bed. What was he going to do now? There is no way he had enough time to think of a gift and buy it before Kyungsoo’s birthday the following day. 
“Think, Jongin. Think,” he said to himself hoping that inspiration would strike him. 
He had already exhausted all of his gift options, spending an exorbitant amount on couple items like converse and clothing with bears on it, in the hopes of marking Kyungsoo as his and only his. But last year the watch was definitely his crescendo. The best gift he had ever bought Kyungsoo. He knew he had done well when Kyungsoo read the inscription and started crying immediately. 
The words “My love, my life. Now and forever,” inscribed on the back of the clock face. 
While it wasn’t humble, Jongin had to admit that he had done really well with that gift. He knew he had especially with the way Kyungsoo had “rewarded” him afterwards. Kyungsoo’s reward was so generous that Jongin felt like it was his birthday already. 
There was no way that he could compete with that gift. He knew that. He knew it then and he definitely knew it now. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he held his head in his hands, trying to think of something, 
“Think, think, what does Kyungsoo love most in the world? Other than me....” he asked himself. Then it struck him, “acting!”
A huge grin formed across his face as inspiration hit. He grabbed the phone that he had tossed on the bed earlier and began doing all of the necessary research for his gift. 
An hour later, when he was sure Kyungsoo wouldn’t be home, he lay down in his bed with his back against the head board and his laptop resting on his legs. He took a deep breath and hit record on his phone.
 “Hey, hyung! I bet your surprised! Happy Birthday, Jagiya! I thought long and hard about what to get you to show you how much I love you, especially this year when things aren’t exactly....easy. But we aren’t going to talk about that. Today is about you! And I plan to spend the day pampering you but this is my gift to you and I really hope you enjoy it,” he said enthusiastically, blowing a kiss at the phone screen and smiling into the camera. 
“So here goes. Welcome hyung, to my ‘reaction to Do Kyungsoo’s movies’ video! Yaaaaaay! And before you say that I’ve never seen your movies and dramas, I have! But I never watch them with you. It’s embarrassing... to watch them in front of you. So, I want you to see how proud of you I am through this video. So let’s begin with Cart!” he announced, loading the movie on his laptop.
Cart: “Nooooooo, hyung! Why do you keep getting slapped?! If I was there, no one would dare touch you. My poor baby! You did nothing wrong! You don’t need that girl to save you. I would never let those things happen to you,” he shouted at the screen, tears streaming down his face as he felt wronged on behalf of the character that his boyfriend played to perfection.
My Annoying Brother: “Hyung! Your eyes. Not your eyes! My poor baby. I can’t watch...”
“No....nooooooooooo. Not now. Not after you just resolved all of your issues. Why did he have to die??? Nooooooo. Oh baby! I would have held you tight. You wouldn’t need her. I would kiss you until the pain goes away,” he cried hysterically. He leaned forward, stroking the face of his boyfriend on the screen as he screamed “hyuuuuuuuung,” in the climax of the movie. 
Pure love: “I don’t like her...she is not...I mean...she doesn’t look that good next to you. I mean she’s cute but I don’t like it. Stop touching her! Stop!”
“Noooooooo. How could this happen to her?! You were so perfect together! Your love was so....pure. Huhu, hyuuuuuung! Don’t cry!” he wailed, caressing the screen in the hopes of comforting the character through the screen. The tears had not stopped rolling down his face since the first movie and Jongin was surprised that he even had tears left to shed. 
 Along with God parts I and II: “Ugh! Why aren’t you in more of this movie? Why have I only seen your face once so far?! I demand more Won Dong-yeon!!!”
“Oh no, hyung! It wasn’t your fault. You are so cute here. I’ve never seen you like this...you are so...beautiful. How do you do this? How do you act like...wow...this is....you’re amazing. You are so good at this. I am so lucky to have you. You are exceptional, my love,” he confessed. He stared at the screen in awe, stroking Kyungsoo’s face like he was something ethereal, too perfect for this tainted world. He managed to peel his eyes from the screen and directed his attention to the phone camera as he whispered, “You’re perfect,” smiling shyly before returning his attention back to the laptop screen.
Room number 7: “Hahahahahahaha. Hyung, you are sooooo cute. Look at you trying to play a tough guy! It’s so precious. This is so good. I’ve never seen you try to play it so cool,” Jongin said while chuckling. 
“Omo, you are smoking!!! This is hilarious. You hate cigarette smoke. You always say that it’s bad for your health. You are such a good actor. And that tattoo....you look hot. We may need to try some...roleplay with this character. He is totally turning me on right now. I just want to devour you when you look like this, mmmmmm,” he whispered seductively, winking at the camera.
“You found the body. I never saw this coming!!!! You are really turning me on! Stop, hyung! I can’t resist you like this. I want to have you now. I can’t believe that there are thirsty fans that get to see you like this! I need to ban this movie. I need to stop people from buying this. No one should get to see you be this cute and hot at the same time! Let me have a word with the movie makers. Maybe I should buy every DVD. Only I should get to see this,” he shouted shamelessly undressing his boyfriend with his eyes.
“Annnnnnd that’s a wrap. I wanted to watch some of a hundred day husband but....erm after what I heard about it and you with her, there is NO WAY. You can’t make me watch that. If I do, I’ll probably ban you from ever leaving the house again. So, this marks the end of my reaction to Do Kyungsoo’s amazing and extraordinary acting!!!! Yaaaaaaay. Hyung, I love you. You are phenomenal at what you do. You give 100% to singing, dancing and acting and it really show. I’m so lucky to get to watch you shine brightly on so many different stages. You amaze the world with your talent and we are so lucky to have you. I am lucky to have you. On your birthday, my love, once again I feel like I’m the one who is receiving the gift because you are my gift, the one that keeps on giving. Every time I think that my heart is full and I can’t love you any more than I already do, you surprise me by increasing that capacity even more. I hope my love for you never ceases to grow and that I always make you feel as loved as you deserve. Happy Birthday, jagiya. Let there be many more for us to share together,” Jongin said, trying his best not to cry. He blew a kiss at the screen and then waved before turning off the video recording.
Jongin took a deep breath as he transferred the video that he recorded onto the laptop. He labelled it “for my one and only on your special day” and then wrote instructions on the birthday card before closing the laptop and placing the card on top. He then went to sleep, totally wiped out.
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Kyungsoo came home from an evening of celebrations with his actor hyungs to a sleeping boyfriend. He was hoping to see the start of his birthday in Jongin’s arms after they had made love but given how deeply his boyfriend was breathing, Kyungsoo knew that there was no chance of that happening. Turning his attention to the desk, he saw the card placed on top of the laptop. He read it with a huge smile on his face before opening the laptop and plugging some headphones into the device. 
After hours spent laughing at his dorky partner reacting to his major works, Kyungsoo closed the lid of the laptop and took off his pants before climbing into bed alongside Jongin. 
“You really outdid yourself, Nini. I didn’t think it was possible. You are perfect and I love you more with each passing day. May we share all of our birthday’s together,” he whispered as a prayer before kissing Jongin on the forehead and snuggling up next to him. He couldn’t wait for Jongin to wake up so that he could reward him. It may result in him not being able to walk properly for the next couple of days but Kyungsoo thought that it was a price he was willing to pay. He was suddenly very grateful that he saved the flannel hoodie and some of the fake tattoos from filming Room Number 7. They were really going to have a lot of fun with those ;)
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