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#if you'd like to be tagged or removed please let me know
zom-tom · 1 day
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Hello everyone!
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This is an interest check for a little project I've been thinking about doing for a little while now! It's called Dreamers for Palestine!
It's a multi creator zine that I want to make that will support multiple mediums of creation and fanwork, and all proceeds will be going to networks doing relief and connection for people on the ground like ESims For Gaza, and any other on the ground relief funds I can find that are helping people with things like menstrual products, baby formula, medicine, food, water, toiletries and more! A lot of these funds are getting way less traction than people think they are, and it is important now more than ever to keep the Palestinian people connected to the world and to support them with day to day living needs, especially with the closure of the Palestine/Egypt border. This fanzine aims to donate as much of the received funds as possible to organizations on the ground and to the esims group!
The link to the interest check form is here!
Please make sure to answer all the questions as honestly as possible, and please rb this post so I can reach as many people as I can! Thank you! 🩷
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Taglist: (Please let me know if you'd like to be removed! I'm just tagging dsmp bloggers I know that also support palestine ^^ 👍)
@the-home-of-innovation @t4tpumpkinduo @ramnonymous @transbeeduo @possuminnit @metfell @rebelpeas @boygirlctommy @crimeboys @wetchickenbreast @cyani07 @waddei @clingyduoapologist @clingyduofan @dsmpdaily @fenteii @syndicatedsystem @cquackity @bugflies00 @ctommy @ctommy-chileno @cloverstellar
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iwasntstable · 2 days
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𝗡𝗢𝗪𝗛𝗘𝗥𝗘 𝗧𝗢 𝗚𝗢 | 𝗧𝗔𝗚𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧
I'm opening a taglist for my multi-chapter Half-Ghoul!Noah x Human!Reader Tokyo Ghoul AU! If you're interested in being tagged in new chapters when they're uploaded, like this post.
  ✶ [WHAT IS NOWHERE TO GO?]
— If at any point you'd like to be removed, send me a message, an ask or you can reply to this post and I'll remove you.
 ‼ NOTE : Please make sure you have your mentions turned on in blog settings. Let me know if you change your username too so I can update the list.
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Open Starter <333
TW: Technical Suicidal Ideation, Choking, Implied Deaths of Innocents + Child Abuse In Later Reblogs :). Please be mentally careful with this RP :).
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"You know, I thought you were over all this destruction. You're not a teenager anymore, Poseidon, you should be able to control and handle yourself. You're starting to act like our father."
The mere thought of that conversation makes Poseidon want to choke, it makes the breath refuse entry outside of his lungs, threatening to suffocate himself with carbon dioxide like he deserves. He's avoiding his wife, he knows, and can feel the stares of the others within his kingdom. His son, Triton, is even blatant with it but he gets a shiver down his spine thinking about bothering his father, so he doesn't. The waves on the surface are acting strange--there are too many riptides to count, drawing people in and forcing them down to placate the destruction that Poseidon wants to focus inward. He wants to puke.
[Poseidon's current prediction is threatening everything you hold dear--yourself, your friends, your family, even your homes (no matter how far from the shore they are). You are trying to ask for his council to either force him to let your home go or to plead with him to. How will you proceed?]
--
@unhinged-waterlilly @totally-penelope-and-not-a-siren @totally-percy-jackson [bc why not :)] @madson-of-hermes-notluke @littlest-sunbeam-of-hermes
@daonedaonlyskh @odysseus-reigning-king-of-ithaca @odysseus-of-ithaca-is-lost @heraaaaaaaa @cerberus-no-biting
[Please tell me if you'd like to be added or removed from the tag-list <333]
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lucienarcheron · 6 months
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Spirit Meets the Bones - IX
Genre: Angst/Romance Warnings: Mentions of physical abuse. Please be mindful: some implied language may be found triggering.
shoutout to @abruisedmuse for being on this journey with me ♥️
Tagging: @climb-the-mountian | @vanserrass | @positivewitch | @readthelastpaage | @zenkindoflove | @animezinglife | @clockwork-ashes | @stormycleric | @eastofatlanta | @carolynmezzosoprano | @carnythian | @runningwiththeoceans | @readychilledwine | @goldenmagnolias | @thedarkinmansfield | @mali22 | @maidr-00 | @electromagnetic-waves | @theeternalstruggle | @devilsfoodcake22 | @the-midnightwriter | @moonfawnx | @weesablackbeak | @ladywhilemia | @illyrianshadowhunter | @alohaangels | @moobell55 | @bibliophiliaxvignette | @easchies | @thelovelymadone | @corcracrow | @feysandfeels
Find it all here.
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Eris blinked at the ceiling of their bedroom. Not that he had tasted sleep from where he lay on their ornate couch.  
Like a coward. 
He had waited for a half-hour that night before approaching the bathroom door and asking her to come out, but she had ignored him — refusing to come back and sleep in their bed. He hadn’t felt like sleeping in it either. 
Eris had listened carefully through that night, waiting to see if she’ll change her mind or if she was crying or whatever the fuck was going on in her mind, but Iris hadn’t made a peep.
He might’ve been proud of her for standing up to his father had she not brought him down in the process. Had she not locked him out of his own bathroom like a child.  
A day and a night had passed. 
She slept in the bathroom. He slept on the couch. Neither of them so much as acknowledging one another.
Iris only left the bathroom when he left their suite and immediately went right back in the moment he stepped back into the room.
He hated himself with the fire of a thousand suns and sat in that bitterness until dawn broke each morning for those two days. Eris debated for quite some time if he should just burn himself from the inside out and be done with it. But instead, he sat up with a groan. If she didn’t want to talk to him, fine. He wasn’t going to beg her. In fact, he wasn’t going to be nice to her at all. It clearly hadn’t gotten him anywhere.
Like a coward.
The words kept repeating themselves in his mind and anger surged through him each time, burning him, his self-loathing festering.
Getting up, he decided he wasn’t going to be gracious and leave her alone today.  Eris stalked over to the bathroom and pounded his fist against the door. 
“I need to use the restroom. Get out.”
Eris let a few minutes of silence pass between them before knocking more firmly. “Open the fucken door, Iris." 
It took a few seconds before her muffled response came. “Go piss somewhere else.”
He clenched his jaw. “If you don’t open the door, I will break it. You’re not going to lock me out of my bathroom for another day.”
Eris heard her stomping before she ripped the door open with a glare. “Your little boy bladder couldn’t wait a few more minutes? I was sleeping.” 
“Sorry to disturb you, Your Highness.” Eris sneered and Iris flushed. “You can resume your beauty sleep in the tub once I’m done with my business.”
They glared at each other and the moment seemed to stretch between them, all the nastiness of the last two nights weighing between them.
“You’re just the fucken worst, aren’t you,” she grumbled, shoving past him. “Talk about a terrible start to my morning.” 
Eris bristled and turned to glare at her back. “You want a terrible start? We can start training today and see where that mouth of yours will get you.”
Iris snorted and turned back to him. “Going to use training as an excuse to put me in my place?” she snapped. “Land some blows where people can’t see, hm?”
Eris froze, staring at her in disbelief. After everything he had explained to her. After everything said — “Take that back.” he breathed. “You take that back right now.”
But Iris only swallowed and stared him down. “No.”
Slowly, Eris fully turned to her, and he watched her as she watched him. Watched her as she braced herself — fixing her stance — clenching her own fists even as she eyed his fisted hands. 
He took one step towards her, and she took a step back.
And all the fight left his body. 
Eris let out a humorless, choked laugh and shook his head. “You — you have some nerve.” he said. “You’re just waiting for me to lay a hand on you.”
“I’d like to see you try.” 
“I’m not trying to.” he snarled. “Don’t you get that?”
But Iris held her ground and it was the look in her eyes that told him the last two nights had impacted her far worse than he had thought. He noticed then, the puffy eyes, the stiff back, and the slight tremble in her bottom lip.
Eris grimaced and shook his head again. “I’m not — I’m too tired for this shit.” he muttered and without waiting for her to do or say anything else to put him on edge, he walked into the bathroom and slammed the door behind him. 
He didn’t remember washing up, changing or even leaving the room. He hadn’t spared her a single glance as he slammed their chamber door behind him. 
Eris made his way through his morning routine of checking in with his hounds and his sentries, then kept his check-in with his mother very brief as she hardly needed his shitty mood. 
She had only sighed at him and said, “Remember kindness. You both need it.” 
Personally, what Eris needed was a break. He needed distance, if only for a short while. Some time to think.
A fresh perspective from people outside of his wretched home.
And because he knew it was still early enough that they wouldn’t have left their home yet, Eris departed the Autumn Court and winnowed to the front gate of his brother’s home. 
Iris had watched him walk off this morning and only clenched her teeth when he slammed the door and left. Her lip trembled momentarily, but she refused to let herself cry anymore.  
Because it would make no difference. Nothing would change. 
She could handle beatings; she was used to those. It would be fine.
But it was the way Eris could hurt her — the way Beron had only snorted as if his son abusing his wife the other way was an absolutely appropriate response —
Iris shuddered and ran a shaky hand through her hair. She had barely slept a wink the last two nights, watching the door and waiting to see if he would break it open and come in anyway.  
Whenever she would finally drift off, Iris would jolt awake, sweating and panicked, because in her nightmares, Eris had barged in, and he had put his hands on her and put her in her place exactly as his father expected.
He’ll break you in ways that I couldn’t. Her father had said the night of their wedding and bile would rise in her throat. 
Her response to him this morning was the aftermath of those dreams, even if he truly had done nothing. Iris rubbed at her eyes and took several deep breaths. The dream was not the reality. He had not touched her. He seemed to have no intention of touching her. He had just...left. 
She grimaced and every terrible thing from the last two nights and this morning slammed into her mind all over again. 
“Why settle for the son of a high lord when the high lord himself could give you the attention you want?”
“If you decide to switch which Vanserra you spread your legs for, you’ll get to that goal much faster with my father.” 
“Stop looking at me like that. I do everything that I can.” 
“But I allow him to do and say whatever the fuck he wants to me as long as my mother has to stop taking the brunt of his shit.”
“You were just ready to use that against me, weren’t you?” 
Mustering what little energy she had left, Iris blinked tiredly then made her way back to the bathing room and cleared her things from it. Mechanically, she bathed and dressed as the thoughts replayed in her mind. Just as it had replayed when she brushed out her curls and continued to repeat as she stared at her reflection in the vanity mirror, barely registering what she was doing. She didn’t want to think. She didn’t want to be. 
Iris had felt his hurt at her words and knew, knew it didn’t have to be this way, but she didn’t know what else to expect. How else to react. All she knew was anger.
Maybe she could go see the hounds and feel better. Or maybe she could take a horse and ride off. 
Cauldron knew where he’d gone and when he’d come back. He didn’t seem likely to stop her. She could just — 
A light knock on the chamber door had her pause at the vanity. Who the hell would be coming to see them this morning?
“Who is it?” she asked quietly. 
“It’s me, Iris.” 
She froze at the voice of Lady Enya and whatever anxiety she had clamped down on since waking up, came barreling back into her.  
What could she be here for? Had Eris gone to complain? Would — would she be reprimanded? She couldn't see Lady Enya doing that but —
Realizing she hadn’t replied, Iris shot up from her seat, quickly smoothed down her dress, and looked over the room, cringing at the sign that the two of them clearly hadn’t been anywhere near each other.  
It would be fine. Lady Enya was kind. Iris needn’t expect the worst. 
Taking a deep breath, she cautiously approached the door and opened it halfway to find her mother-in-law before her, standing alone. She gave Iris a small smile.
“Hello, Iris.”
“Hello, Lady Enya,” Iris replied and bowed her head slightly. “How – how are you?”
Her mother-in-law smiled tightly. “Well enough. You?”
The anxiousness prickled at her skin and Iris’s grip tightened on the doorframe, giving Lady Enya her own tight smile. “Well enough too, I suppose.”
Enya nodded knowingly. “Understandable.” She paused for a moment before asking, “May I come in? I was hoping to sit with you for a bit if this isn’t a bad time.”  
“Of course, my Lady,” Iris replied and swallowed. “Eris — he isn’t here though.”
“That’s okay. I came to see you.” Lady Enya replied with a small smile and Iris blinked. “If you’ll have me, of course.”
“Of — of course. Please come in.” Iris said immediately, opening the door wider. 
Lady Enya smiled more fully as she stepped in, and Iris felt her cheeks heat as her mother-in-law surveyed their room with a knowing gaze. 
“We...didn’t have time to tidy up this morning. I’m sorry you have to see it this way.”
Enya chuckled. “I’m surprised he left the room so frazzled,” she said, continuing to glance around, her lips twitching. “Knowing my son, he would’ve had a stroke to walk out like this.”
“He’s too busy trying to give me one,” Iris mumbled then panic slammed in her as she quickly looked at her mother-in-law and cleared her throat, the color in her cheeks intensifying. “Sorry.”
Enya waved a hand with that small, knowing smile and walked toward their seating area. Iris watched as the Lady paused in front of their plush couch. She felt the heat spread through her body as she watched her mother-in-law’s lips twitch again, her gaze on the pillow with her son’s lingering scent, thrown there haphazardly. But Enya sat without a word and Iris stood for a moment before awkwardly taking a seat next to her. 
A moment of silence passed before Iris shot up again. “I, um, I can have them bring tea?” she quickly said then blinked. “I’m not actually sure how to ask for it, the tray usually just comes up — but if you’d like? Or — or a brew of coffee? Or —” 
Lady Enya seemed to be fighting back a smile as Iris’s face heated. Gently gripping her hand, her mother-in-law slowly pulled her back to sit next to her. 
“That’s not necessary. I just came to check in on you and chat,” she said and Iris blinked again. 
“Oh.”  
“I see the two of you are getting along splendidly,” Enya said, glancing at her, and Iris grimaced before quickly fixing her expression.
“Um. We, uh —”
But Enya chuckled again, and Iris realized with a flush she was teasing her. 
“I’d say we were a perfect match, but I don’t want to jinx it,” she said with a dry laugh then swallowed. “Dinner the other night certainly set that in stone.” 
Enya gave her a sad smile. “That’s why I’m here. I wanted to see how you were doing,” she said, and Iris avoided her gaze. “I’m sorry it went the way it did. It was just supposed to be the three of us.”
Iris shook her head, her eyes on her hands settled in her lap. “Please don’t apologize. You did nothing wrong.” 
Lady Enya sighed. “That whole evening was wrong,” she said, her lips a thin line. “I’m sure Eris wasn’t happy with how it went either. I assume the two of you have discussed it.” 
“Discussed it. Yes.” Iris said with a snort then straightened, glancing at her mother-in-law who gave her a small smile. 
“I’m assuming you two had it out. I hope my son isn’t bleeding out somewhere.” 
Iris’s flush deepened. “He’s escaped unscathed for now,” she mumbled. “Dagger was too far.”
“As his mother, I am grateful for that.” 
They shared another small smile and it fell silent again. Iris bit her lip and then met her mother-in-law’s gaze. 
“I am sorry if anything I said caused you any additional distress,” she said quietly. “My mouth has gotten the better of me before.”  
Enya shook her head. “I’m sorry you were put in a position to deal with it at all,” she replied with a frown. “I know Eris is very upset about it as I’m sure you are as well.”
Iris tensed and her fingers gripped her dress. “I am...deeply unsettled.”
Lady Enya’s expression tightened, and it was a moment before she could answer. “The High Lord believes things should always be a certain way. He is accustomed to his way of things and will offer no accommodations for anything to be different from what he is used to. Including the way he speaks to people.” she said carefully. “His way, however, is not the correct way nor is it a way I agree with. Neither does my son.”
Enya paused and surveyed Iris. “We have found ways to work around it,” she said slowly. “But now, you’re in the picture so the scope of our methods needs to be adjusted. I hope you will grant us patience with it.”
Iris digested this for a moment, biting her lip and her mother-in-law reached out a hand.
“I know this transition hasn’t been easy on you at all so please know, you can take all the time you need to get used to it,” she said and smiled at Iris. “I am here for you and happy to be here as you adjust.” 
Iris’s face softened and she placed a hand atop Enya’s. “Thank you, Lady Enya. I am grateful for your words and...am glad you feel this way.” 
“Please don’t call me lady.” her mother-in-law said with a smile. “You’re my daughter now too. If you’re comfortable calling me mother, I would be thrilled.”
Iris flushed and blinked rapidly, emotion rising through her at the word. She had never been given the chance to call anyone mother. She had never been given a chance to do a lot of things. 
“I would love that,” she said softly, and her mother-in-law smiled brightly at her, squeezing her hand. 
“I’m glad to hear it,” she said and as they fell silent again, she watched Iris curiously for a moment. Then Enya quietly added, “Eris left early, hm?”
“...Yes,” Iris said and at her hesitation, her mother-in-law tilted her head.  “I’m not sure where he went but...he didn’t leave on a good note.” 
“Mmm.” Lady Enya mused, then patted her hand. “He’ll be back. Do you think you’ll be open to talking to him when he returns?”
Iris blinked. After their discussion earlier, she wasn’t sure Eris would want to talk to her, much less listen to anything she had to say. Maybe he would prefer she kept quiet for once and he did all the talking.
“I don’t think I have much of a choice in whether or not he’ll want to talk to me.”
Lady Enya pursed her lips. “With the son I raised, you will always have a choice, Iris.” she said firmly, and Iris’s brows furrowed. Enya paused for a moment. “May I speak freely? I’d like to give you my opinion if you’d like to hear it.” 
Iris flushed at the question. As if she’d say no.
“Of course, La — of course. Please speak as freely as you’d like.”
Her mother-in-law gave her a small smile and then gently spoke. “I never want to overstep between the two of you as you navigate this relationship of yours, however...know that this will take time and patience. It will take effort to build something of value between the two of you.” Enya paused and took a deep breath. “I think the most important part is whether you want to put in this effort. Your intentions play a big role in how it will proceed and truly, I understand if you are hesitant. The question becomes...do you find that you want to know my son as a husband? As a partner?”
Iris bit her lip and looked down. Would it matter if she did or not? She was already his wife. Nothing about that would change, regardless of her intentions. So, she answered honestly. 
“I don’t know,” she said quietly. “There’s so much I’m unsure of...I don’t know what to believe about him.”
Lady Enya hummed then sighed. “I know this might be hard to believe because of what people think they know about him but...know that my son has a good heart. Even though he’s always been forced to hide it,”  she said quietly. “And I’m not only saying this because he’s my son. I’m saying this because I’ve lived with someone who has gone out of their way to make my every waking hour difficult. Who does the same to him.” 
Iris looked up in surprise at the words. At the very vulnerable confession. She met the firm gaze of her mother-in-law.  
“My son is not his father,” Enya said very, very softly. “Even though he has to pretend otherwise. He will not be that way with you.”
Iris straightened as a tense silence filled the room and Lady Enya’s eyes didn’t waver from hers.
“But that doesn’t mean he won’t make mistakes. Or say foolish things. You both will and should hold each other accountable for them each time. He will listen.” she said, and the corner of her mouth lifted. “Threaten to stab him a few times, if need be, goodness knows he needs it at times with that mouth of his.”
Iris bit back a smile at the knowing look Enya shot her then sobered as she added, 
“But also...grant him a little patience. He’s never had something like this before.” 
“Did you even consider what this has been like for me?” He had snarled at her the other night.
She hadn’t. Not really. Iris pursed her lips, rubbing a finger to her brow as she quietly spoke. “We...haven’t been very kind to each other. I — I haven’t been very kind.” 
Lady Enya nodded knowingly. “I’m sure with the heightened emotions, kindness was the last thing on either of your minds. That night was a stressful evening for you both,” she said gently. “If you are willing and you find yourself wanting to, be honest with him. He will meet you in the middle if you are willing to meet him.”
Iris grimaced and before she could stop herself, she muttered, “The idea of being vulnerable with him makes me want to vomit.”
Her mother-in-law laughed softly and gave her a knowing look. “I don’t want to speak for him but as his mother, I can tell you with absolute certainty, he feels exactly the same way.” 
Iris’s lip twitched, and then she sighed, her fingers curling in her lap. “I guess that makes it a little better.”
“Mutual embarrassment does make things a tad easier.”
Iris gave a small shrug with heated cheeks, wondering if Eris would ever feel as embarrassed as she had felt at this moment. “I suppose I can find it in me to be nice to him when he comes back.”
Her mother-in-law gave her an amused smile. “Don’t be too nice, now. We do need to keep him in check,” she said with a wink and Iris chuckled. The two sat in a few moments of comfortable silence as Iris processed what she was being told. 
 “I — I don’t know how to not doubt him,” she said quietly. “I don’t know how to...trust him.”
“Time and patience, my dear,” Enya replied with a small smile. “As much as you think you’ll have a hard time trusting him...Eris trusts people even less than you do. You were thrust into his life as suddenly as he was into yours and he isn’t very good at expressing his feelings.” she said and gave her a gentle smile. “You both are coming from the same place. Trust yourself and your judgment. But also...give him the chance to prove himself to you. Kindness will go a long way.” 
It was one thing for Iris to be worried about trusting him, but it was a completely different idea to think of him being scared of trusting her. Eris being scared of anything that had to do with her was a thought that hadn’t crossed her mind at all. 
Iris bit her lip, the idea of being even more open with him, giving him the chance to find ways where he could hurt her through this vulnerability —
Lady Enya squeezed her hand gently with a short chuckle. “You’re making the same face he does when he’s overthinking things. Both of you have come to expect the worst from others. Don’t let that seep into your marriage.”  
Iris swallowed and then licked her lips. “It — it doesn’t feel like it’s supposed to be a real marriage,” she whispered.  
Lady Enya reached out a hand and gently brushed back a loose strand of hair from Iris’s face, then rested a hand on her cheek with a sad smile. “I know it can be scary to start a new chapter of your life with so little choice in the matter, but you are not alone,” she said then firmly added. “I am here. So is Eris, if you’ll have him. When he returns, talk things out. You two get to decide how real you want it to be.”
Iris blinked and her throat bobbed as emotion clogged in her throat, at the tender touch of a mother to her cheek. She resisted the deep urge to hug her. She hadn’t been hugged in so long. By anyone soft-hearted. By anyone who understood. By...anyone at all. 
“Thank you,” she whispered, and her eyes welled up at the look of understanding that crossed Enya’s face. 
Lady Enya smiled softly and pulled her into her arms, giving Iris a bone-crushing hug, one that she had been craving. She sagged in her arms and Enya seemed to hug her tighter, especially when Iris let out a sniffle.
It took Iris a few minutes before she shakily pulled away, sniffling quietly. She let out a breath and quickly wiped at her eyes, her cheeks coloring in embarrassment. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “It’s been a very stressful few days.”
“I’m sure it has.” her mother-in-law said kindly. “Never apologize. I’m here. I understand.”
Iris nodded, hands gripping her dress to restrain her from asking for another hug. “Thank you.” she said again then licked her lips before testing the word, “Mother.”
Lady Enya beamed. “It sounds so lovely when you say it,” she said and squeezed her hand. “I hope all we discussed doesn’t make it seem like I’m trying to speak for Eris or justify anything that has happened but...I hope it helps your willingness to understand him a little more.” Enya bit her lip then added carefully, “I hope you feel more comfortable allowing him the chance to understand you.” 
Iris swallowed as the word hope clanged through her. The morning after, she had woken up with hope. Hoping for something more. Hoping for things to be different even though she still had her doubts. 
Her eyes dropped down into her lap. Iris’s grip tightened in the folds of her dress as she looked up at her mother-in-law’s face and then back to her lap, her heart thundered wildly in her chest. “I just —” she began then continued in a whisper, “I want to trust him. I want to but I’m afraid. I’m so afraid he’s going to be just like my father — that he’ll hurt me too and I —" 
Lady Enya’s hand came to gently lift Iris’s chin and met her gaze. The fire blazing in them had Iris widening her eyes.  
“My son would never lay a hand on you,” she said quietly but Iris didn’t miss the firmness in her tone. “He has been abused and has watched others around him be abused his whole life and knows what that does to a person. I raised him as best as I could to know better. To try and be better as much as he could in the circumstances we’re in.” Enya paused and released Iris’s chin to touch her cheek with a sad smile. “I wish I could take away your doubts about him but alas, I cannot. You will have to allow yourself to discover what he has to offer you. I can only assure you as best as I can that you are safe with him. He will keep you safe with everything he has. You only have to allow it.”
Iris swallowed and then nodded tightly as Lady Enya stood and Iris stood with her.  
“I will give you some time alone then,” she said, squeezing Iris’s upper arm. “I simply wanted to see how you are doing. I don’t want to impose.”
Iris gave her a small smile. “You could never. I had hoped you and I would spend as much time together as possible.”
Lady Enya smiled. “We certainly will. I will make sure of it,” she said and then taking both of Iris’s hands into her own, she met her gaze. “Despite the less-than-ideal circumstances of you joining our family, I am thrilled you’re here and to have you as my daughter. I look forward to us getting to know each other well.” She gave her a knowing look. “Don’t hesitate to come to me for anything, understood?” 
Following Lady Enya slowly to the door, Iris felt the weight that had been sitting on her chest lift as her mother-in-law turned back to her one last time. “I expect to see you with Eris for tea starting tomorrow, alright? Then we’ll shoo him and spend time alone.” 
Iris gave her a small smile. “Sounds like a plan.” 
Lady Enya gave her another smile and quietly departed, leaving Iris to stand at the open door to process.
Shutting it silently, she leaned against it for a moment and took a breath. Iris knew her fear was valid. Her apprehension was valid, even if Eris was trying his best. Even with all his mother said.  
But then Iris thought back to his shocked face from this morning.  
His disbelief when he said, “Take it back.”
She bit the inside of her cheek and walked towards her vanity, slowly sinking into the chair. She gazed at herself in the mirror, her eyes taking in her expression of worry. Iris was certainly entitled to how she felt but... reacting the way she did hadn’t made her feel any better. She sighed then turned and gazed around her living space. Her new home.
Home yet…
What did she want? Did she want something with Eris?  
She wasn’t foolish to think this marriage couldn’t play out to her advantage. That already, he wasn’t planning to limit her entire existence the way she had been with her father. But at what cost? Did it have a cost? How much would she have to endure?
And when he came back...would he want to talk to her? And more importantly, what would Eris have to say?
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24 in 2024
i haven't seen any of these floating around yet, so i thought i'd get one started! here are 24 books i want to read in 2024 (and a bonus readerly goal):
Welcome to Your World: How the Built Environment Shapes Our Lives by Sarah Williams Goldhagen
Obsolescence: An Architectural History by Daniel M. Abramson
Offended Sensibilities by Alisa Ganieva
The Night, The Night by Rodrigo Blanco Calderón
Dayswork by Chris Bachelder and Jennifer Habel
Dawn by Sevgi Soysal
Trashlands by Alison Stine
The Girl in Red by Christina Henry
How to be Eaten by Maria Adelmann
The Way Spring Arrives and Other Stories edited by Yu Chen and Regina Kanyu Wang
The Scourge Between Stars by Ness Brown
Black Tide by KC Jones
A Half-Built Garden by Ruthanna Emrys
The Ambergris Trilogy by Jeff VanderMeer
The Great Cities Duology by NK Jemisin
The Spider and her Demons by sydney khoo
A Shining by Jon Fosse
Bad Cree by Jessica Johns
Other Terrors: An Inclusive Anthology edited by Vince A Liaguno and Rena Mason
Self-Portrait with Nothing by Aimee Pokwatka
Always Coming Home by Ursula K. Le Guin
Unexpected Places to Fall From, Unexpected Places to Land by Malcolm Devlin
Always North by Vicki Jarrett
At the Edge of the Woods by Masatsugu Ono
Bonus Readerly Goal: i'm gonna try REALLY hard to only buy a book after i read five (5), this year (pre-orders DNI). gotta get that backlist under control SOMEhow, right??
notes on the color-coding: the green books are Just Because books (with a couple little red riding hood adjacent retellings in there, which is writing-project-related). a few of these came in a translation subscription box, and i am Interested in Architecture, and i'd love to read more of both this year.
the blue ones are bookmarked for nano prep (i wanna write something fucked up about space this year, i think, it's still cooking). i know it's early for that, but The Vibes™ have to marinate for a while. will probably add some haunted house books to this part of the list!
lastly, the purple ones are driscoll adjacent! filling my words well with related vibes worked well, this year, and i want to do that again next year. since i read through the entirety of my previous ~driscoll vibes~ stack last year, i've been restocking it, so most of these are very recently purchased.
(please note that all this color-coding/explanatory text is absolutely optional and Extra™, if you want to play--you can add it if you'd like, but by no means feel Obligated To Do So lol)
tagging @asexualbookbird, @six-of-ravens/@sixofravens-reads, @agardenandlibrary, @freckles-and-books, and anyone else who wants to play!
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malcriada · 2 months
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Help save Bilal's family!
i want to talk about my friend Bilal @bilal-salah0. for over a year now, Bilal has been living in germany, trying to adjust to his new living situation in a foreign country, learning a new language and working full time. 
when the war started, he was far away from home and his family and has been living in daily fear for their lives ever since. 
being forced to work long hours and promoting his family’s fundraiser at the same time, he has taken on more responsibility than anyone ever should. still, he managed to raise money for their evacuation fund and helped take care of his family’s daily needs with the money he was making while working. 
in a cruel twist of fate, all of this got taken away in an instant. he lost his job and his apartment and even his residence permit. which means he is at danger of deportation from germany that could happen as soon as next week!
i have been in daily contact with Bilal for a while now and connected him with some of my friends in germany. together, we are trying our utmost to make sure he can stay in the country. anyone who knows german bureaucracy knows what kind of hell it is. but we won't give up.
without his job, he was forced to dip into the money of his family’s evacuation fund to cover their daily expenses like food and shelter. this meant he had to raise his goal from €70,000 to €100,000. this was not an easy decision for him to make, he even asked for my advice on whether or not to do it, because he did not want anyone to think he was scamming people. 
even in such a desperate situation, Bilal does not want to be seen as someone who would ever take advantage of people's generosity
his family is comprised of 18 members, 10 of them are adults and 8 are children under 16 years old, some of them newborns who were born amidst the chaos of war and displacement.
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currently, he is sitting at:
€71,817 / €100,000
donations have been slowing down ever since he reached his original goal. i cannot stress how important it is that they pick back up!
WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME! HE NEEDS TO REACH HIS GOAL BY AUGUST 15TH!
THAT MEANS HE HAS TO RAISE NEARLY 30K IN THE NEXT TEN DAYS. THIS CANT WAIT.
his campaign has been verified and can be found on @/el-shab-hussein’s and @/nabulsi’s list of vetted fundraisers here (#132, line 136) so PLEASE don't hesitate to share and donate.
With such a tight deadline, i cant do this on my own. So i implore you to PLEASE share this wherever you can– on your whatsapp groups, on your discord servers, please share his story on other platforms wherever you have reach! Please share his story wherever you can, so that we can ease this burden from his shoulders.
[ID: a gfm link with a picture of two small children sitting in the sand in front of a cooking pot. they are looking up a the camera, eyes half-closed. the title reads "Donate to Help Evacuate My Family from Gaza to Safety, organized by Bilal salah" End ID]
tagging for reach under the cut, please let me know if you'd like to be removed:
@meaganfoster @briarhips @dirhwangdaseul @mahoushojoe
@schoolhater @pcktknife @sawasawako
@feluka @terroristiraqis @irhabiya @commissions4aid-international @wellwaterhysteria
@deepspaceboytoy @post-brahminism @khanger @kibumkim @neechees
@mangocheesecakes @kyra45-helping-others @7bitter @tortiefrancis
@toiletpotato @fromjannah @vague-humanoid @criptochecca
@aristotels @komsomolka @xinakwans @heritageposts @nibeul
@ot3 @amygdalae @ankle-beez @communistchilchuck @dykesbat
@watermotif @stuckinapril @mavigator @lacecap @yugiohz
@socalgal @chilewithcarnage @ghelgheli @sayruq @northgazaupdates2
@vakarians-babe @wayneradiotv
@psychotic-gerard @mavigator @communistkenobi @socalgal @chilewithcarnage
@ghelgheli @determinate-negation @papasmoke @omegaversereloaded
@xinakwans @givemearmstopraywith @loombreaking @killy @deathlonging
@palms-upturned @blackpearlblast @littlegermanboy @loveaankilaq @sar-soor
@fridgebride @27-moons @tamarrud @familyabolisher @fleshdyk3
@decolonize-solidarity @palipunk @gothhabiba
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schoolhater · 2 months
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Help Bilal's Family Survive!
After Bilal @bilal-salah0 reached his goal on August 1st, he contacted me to let me know that, because the Rafah crossing is still bombed and closed, he can't actually use the funds to evacuate his family right away. The funds have since been redirected toward the skyrocketing cost of living in Gaza.
His family now has to raise another €30,000 as soon as possible to sustain themselves before the Rafah crossing opens, which could be as soon as next week for all we know.
My post celebrating Bilal getting close to his original GFM goal has over 7,000 notes, yet Bilal is only bringing in €20 every hour or so, which is a sharp decline from his previous momentum.
Bilal is still struggling with his own housing insecurity in Germany and the looming threat of deportation. Despite this horror, he's put the work in to vet a handful of fundraisers, promote fundraisers, and call out scams for us. He is simply too busy to campaign for his family on his own.
I encourage everyone to donate to Bilal's family and share his campaign with people you know on other social media platforms. You can repost any of the art people have made for him and share the pictures on his gofundme.
Bilal is a valuable member of our community! Please don't let him fall through the cracks!
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verification source (no. 132 on el-shab-hussein/nabulsi's sheet)
current progress: €70,827 / €100,000
tagging for reach, DM me if you'd like to be removed from this list:
@timetravellingkitty @meaganfoster @briarhips @mazzikah @mahoushojoe 
@rhubarbspring @schoolhater @pcktknife@transmutationisms@sawasawako 
@feluka @terroristiraqis @irhabiya @commissions4aid-international @wellwaterhysteria 
@deepspaceboytoy @post-brahminism @junglejim4322 @kibumkim @neechees 
@mangocheesecakes @kyra45-helping-others @marnota @7bitter @tortiefrancis 
@toiletpotato @fromjannah @omegaversereloaded @vague-humanoid @criptochecca 
@aristotels @komsomolka @neptunerings @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @heritageposts 
@ot3 @amygdalae @ankle-beez@communistchilchuck @dykesbat 
@watermotif @stuckinapril @violentrevolution @mavigator @lacecap 
@socalgal @chilewithcarnage @ghelgheli @sayruq @northgazaupdates2
@decolonize-the-left @bisexualpositivity @arty-cakes @closet-keys @assad-zaman
@claudeleine @killy @heritageposts @beanlightbibblekeepflickbeanboss @ixzotica
@realitycanbewhateveridesire @avifromaplaceofcaring @abyssbirds @maruxee @merricat-3
@tedious-insanity @budgies-in-blue @bandedbulbussnarfblat @emeraldinerosefaedragon @mothalaalee
@mere-glim @patantasma @dreamcaster-jelly @fuzzy-little-wormi-guy @salty-mush-soup
@leviticus101st @yamino @a-wild-louser-appears @kn1ghtraine @vhstape
@whatthe4355 @ehksidian @lyunarium @sunpdf @mytinystay @lopiditty
@illiterate-words @aphicius @shrimpkidd @megabullz @unknown-lifeform
@mindfulruminate @nibbelraz @beasaintgermain @fluffykitty149 @tododeku-or-bust
@littlestpersimmon @wayneradiotv @windwake-me-up-inside @flamagenitus @little-big-batbag
@chamiryokuroi @alliumduorpf @sunlitmcgee @fanficphoenixed @ourflagmeansdeath
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lonniemachin · 1 month
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TIME SENSITIVE: GET AHMED AND MARAM TO 30K BY 08/31/2024
At €28,485, we have 11 days left to raise €1,515 for my friends Ahmed and Maram, a Palestinian couple trapped in Gaza with their three small children Habiba (4), Kareem (2), and Muhammad (1). Over the months I've been in contact with Ahmed, I've learned of his family's multiple displacement, moving 11 times between actively dangerous areas, their struggle with hepatitis and malnutrition, and their daily suffering with lack of healthy food, water hygiene products, and a truly safe place to stay. With 3 kids under 5 to raise amidst active genocide, Ahmed and his wife are exhausted, and the kids have had their young childhood ripped away. Their hope is to escape Gaza so that they may raise their children in peace. If the aggression stops, they wish to build a new house and re-establish their lives in their beloved homeland. Either way, they need help.
Please give what you can so that they may reach their short-term goal ASAP. With news that talks to open the Rafah crossing have at least advanced, they must be ready to evacuate with their whole family intact. Using the link above, you can contribute any amount -- nothing is too small to matter. You can also enter my jewelry raffle supporting them and two other families and win some beautiful crystal pieces for the most important cause.
Their campaign is 100% legitimate. They have been vetted by el-shab-hussein, featured in a video by YouTuber Ro Ramdin, and I have personally seen multiple forms of verification, some of which Ahmed has sent to me to give to donors through DM if it would secure their donation. I am in a group chat with he and their beneficiary, who updates us on the movement of all funds.
€28,485/€30,000 SHORT TERM GOAL.
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Tagging for reach under the cut. Let me know if you'd like to be removed.
@timetravellingkitty @deathlonging @briarhips @dirhwangdaseul @mahoushojoe
@rhubarbspring @schoolhater @pcktknife @transmutationisms @sawasawako
@feluka @terroristiraqiss @irhabiya @commissions4aid-international @wellwaterhysteria
@deepspaceboytoy @post-brahminism @khanger @evillesbianvillain @neechees
@mangocheesecakes @kyra45-helping-others @jezior0 @7bitter @tortiefrancis
@toiletpotato @fromjannah @omegaversereloaded @vague-humanoid @tododeku-or-bust
@aristotels @komsomolka @xinakwans @heritageposts @nibeul
@ot3 @amygdalae @ankle-beez @dykesbat
@watermotif @stuckinapril @mavigator @lacecap @yugiohz
@socalgal @chilewithcarnage @ghelgheli @sayruq @northgazaupdates2
@vakarians-babe @wayneradiotv @paper-mario-wiki @rthko @decolonize-solidarity
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daisynik7 · 1 year
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Teach Me, Senpai!
Pairing: Ino x f!reader x Nanami
Rating: Explicit - MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Word Count: ~2.6k
cw: smut - threesome, spit-roast, PIV sex (doggy style), blow job, cunnilingus, vaginal fingering, Nanami is sorta a perv oops, Ino calls Nanami senpai, a hint of a breeding kink, use of pet names, everyone is an adult here in case that doesn’t come across clearly
Summary: Takuma Ino is your silly, golden retriever boyfriend who brings you along to meet his mentor, Nanami Kento. You’ve heard a lot about him, mostly because your boyfriend constantly praises him for being so amazing. You underestimate how close their relationship is until Ino starts asking his "senpai" for pointers on how to spice things up in the bedroom. What better way to learn than to demonstrate, right?
Author’s Note: I'm currently in heat, can you blame me? I tried my best to edit and proofread, sorry if there are any glaring grammar mistakes or typos, please ignore! Tagging @todorosie @crazychaoticizzy @gojoloves @brightnessemma @batafuraikisu (I know you didn't ask, but I'm tagging you anyways bc ily and I think you'd like this lol). I'm sorry if I missed any tags, Tumblr wouldn't let me tag you! Likes, reblogs, and/or comments are always appreciate, thank you for reading! MDNI divider by @/cafekitsune.
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“You’re going to love him, I swear!” Ino insists, dragging you down the hallway of the office building, past empty cubicles. It’s past five and all the employees are out for the remainder of the day. 
“I just don’t see why I have to meet him,” you argue, following him reluctantly.
“Because he’s important to me! He’s my mentor, my senpai! I have the highest respect for him, and I think it’s cool for you to finally put a face to a name. Aren’t you curious about the guy I’m always talking about?”
“Not really,” you answer, rolling your eyes. Honestly, you’ve grown sick of hearing your boyfriend gush so much about this Nanami fellow. You’re starting to feel jealous about how highly he thinks of this other man. “Why are we even here? This seems like a very random meeting spot.”
“We debrief here sometimes after our missions. He used to be a salary man, so I guess they still let him use the office.” They arrive at a closed door at the end of the hall. Ino knocks twice, a bright smile on his face, a little too excited for this.
A well-built blonde man answers, donning a blue dress shirt and spotted tie. You immediately notice how large his hands are, clenched to the door frame, staring at you from behind steampunk glasses. “Hello.”
“Nanami! Hey! This is my girlfriend, the one I’ve been telling you about.” You introduce yourself to him with a handshake, confirming that they are indeed very big compared to yours. You feel guilty noticing something that can be misconstrued as inappropriate, even lewd in most cases, so you quickly let the thought fade, stepping inside the room. 
It’s a normal looking office, quite barren, except for the few papers stacked on the desk and a map posted on one of the walls. There’s a single chair facing the table, so you take that as Ino stands beside you, arm around your shoulders. “Thanks for letting us stop by. I really wanted to introduce you two to each other.”
Nanami nods curtly, leaning on the edge of the desk in front of you. Your eyes almost drift toward his crotch, curious about his size, but you resist the temptation, ashamed of yourself for even imagining something so completely wrong, especially with your boyfriend right next to you. “You said you wanted to speak to me about something,” he says, focusing on Ino. He removes his glasses, tucking them in his breast pocket.
“Ah, right! Well, I’m a little shy to ask, especially since I haven’t mentioned it to her yet…” Ino scratches his nape nervously, tugging his beanie to cover his reddening ears.
You look at him, confused. “What are you talking about?”
He bites his lip, choosing his words carefully before speaking. “Well, you know how you and I have been…you know, having some trouble in the bedroom?”
At that, you immediately freeze, gaping at him, shocked. A strangled noise comes out of Nanami’s throat, equally jarred.
Ino continues. “I want to get some advice from someone I really trust, like Nanami.” He glances between you, waiting for a response, an uneasy grin on his face. 
You’re stunned, heat surrounding your entire body now, mortified that your boyfriend would casually bring this up without any warning whatsoever. It’s no secret to either of you that your sex life has gotten a bit lackluster recently. Besides missionary and the occasional blowjob, there isn’t much else that you’ve tried in the bedroom. Neither of you are that experienced to begin with, and you both lack the confidence to initiate something different, something new. It’s a matter that you’ve been meaning to resolve privately. Or so you thought. 
No one speaks for what feels like an eternity. You’re tempted to grab your boyfriend and haul ass out of there, hoping this entire conversation can be forgotten or played up to be some kind of cruel, sick joke. However, you remain seated, curiously anticipating Nanami’s response. After all, you haven’t flat-out refused yet, and neither has he. 
Nanami clears his throat. “What kind of advice do you need?” You’re surprised that he’s even entertaining the idea. 
“I just want a few tips on how to spice things up,” Ino answers. “Make it more enjoyable for her.” He puts his arm around you again, squeezing your shoulder. You don’t know whether to punch him or kiss him; the arousal growing between your legs says the latter. The thought of another man who’s practically a stranger instructing your eager boyfriend on how to pleasure you is titillating and definitely something different, something new. You won’t deny it: you’re intrigued. 
Nanami crosses his arms over his chest, avoiding either of your gazes, focused on the floor instead. “I will help, if you both consent to it.”
Ino turns to you with puppy dog eyes. “Babe, you cool with this?”
Too invested now to refuse, you reply, “Sure.”
Your boyfriend lets out a sigh of relief, the tension relaxing in the air surrounding you. “Sweet. Me too.” He looks at Nanami, a bright smile on his face now, clearly thrilled about this. “What’s first, senpai?”
Nanami clears his throat again, standing up straight, taking a step towards you. “Well, foreplay is always a good place to start.”
Ino sticks his finger up. “Right! Foreplay. Uh, do you have a pen and paper so I can take notes…?”
“You don’t seriously need to take notes on foreplay, do you?” he snaps. “It’s as simple as kissing and touching on all the right spots.”
“What spots are those?” 
“It’s probably better if you ask her.” Nanami points to you, making direct eye contact. “Where do you like to be touched?”
You swallow hard, timid from being put on the spot like this. “Just the normal places.”
“The two of you have to communicate better if this is ever going to work out,” he says, a hint of impatience in his tone. “Show him.”
Committing to this fully now, you stand up, grab Ino’s hand and brush it against your lips. “I like it when you kiss me. And when you touch my lips.” 
He smiles at you. “That’s good.”
“You can also put your fingers in my mouth every once in a while. If you want,” you suggest, licking the tip of his middle finger. 
He smirks. “Yeah. I definitely want that, too.”
“Sometimes, it’s better to learn by doing it,” Nanami interjects, watching the two of you carefully. 
You gaze at Ino’s lips, then into his eyes, nodding. He leans in, kissing you slowly. He’s always been a good kisser, a great one, actually. The problem is that he’s too gentle with you. 
“Kiss her neck,” Nanami orders, arms at his sides now, hands clenched into tight fists. 
Ino follows, trailing down your chin until he’s at your neck, sucking on your skin. 
“Put your fingers in her mouth. She said she likes that, right?”
Ino hums, tracing the outline of your lips with his thumb before pushing it in. You surround him, using your grip to pump him in and out of you. His other hand drifts to your waist, teasing the elastic of your pants.
“Are you getting wet, sweetheart?” Nanami’s voice is low and sultry; the use of the pet name has you unraveling much quicker than you expect. Without thinking, you breathe out, “Yes,” pushing his fingers deeper down your throat. 
“Fuck, baby,” Ino moans, hot on your ear. “Where else do you want to be touched?”
You pull him out, swallowing your thick saliva, placing his hand between your legs. “Touch me here.”
Ino, eyes glossy with lust, slowly shimmies your pants down your legs, revealing your soaked panties. “Oh shit, you really are wet, fuck.”
“Eat her out,” Nanami demands. There’s a desperate gruffness in his voice that’s undeniable now, and one glance is all it takes for you to realize that he’s hard, an impressive bulge strained in his slacks. He shoves all his belongings off the desk, making room for you. “Here. Do it here.”
Ino curses under his breath, cock stiff in his sweats, leading you to the table, where you sit at the edge, spreading your thighs open for him. He slips your panties off, licking his lips before diving into your arousal, tongue pressed firmly on your clit. “Fuck,” you moan, squirming from the sensation. 
Nanami walks to the other side, near your head, staring at Ino’s face buried in your pussy. Instinctually, you reach for him, pulling him by the belt, tongue hanging out. His eyes flit to yours, surprised when you say, “Touch me, senpai.”
Ino moans into you, clearly turned on by it. Obliging, Nanami hoists your shirt off, leaving you in just your bra, which he hastily unhooks to bare your chest. Bending towards you, he wraps his lips around one breast, suckling at your teat, his hand working the other nipple, pinched between his fingers. You’re close to your climax; you just need a little bit more. As if he can read your mind, Nanami releases you with a pop, saying, “Suck on her clit until she comes. Fuck her with your fingers at the same time.” His sudden vulgarity spurs you on, grinding your hips against your boyfriend’s face, pulling Nanami back to your tits.
Ino muffles, puckering his lips around you, sliding his middle finger inside you. You throw your head back on the desk, ecstasy rippling through your entire being, knees shaking with sensitivity. 
“Yeah, she likes that,” Nanami purrs, flicking his tongue on your peaked nipples. “Put another in. One at a time, until she’s full.”
Ino manages to fit three of his digits inside you before you orgasm with him latched to your swelling bud, coating him in your slick. He doesn’t stop licking until you’ve come down from your high, pushing his head away, overstimulated. Nanami removes himself from you, unbuckling his belt, watching intently as your boyfriend slips his wet fingers inside your mouth. “Taste yourself babe. You’re so fucking good.” You slurp your own juices off him, pussy throbbing, aching to be fucked. 
“You like that, don’t you, sweetheart?” Nanami murmurs, shimmying out of his pants, erection protruding from his briefs. He palms it, rubbing his thumb over the wet spot oozing from the tip. “Ino, tease her a little bit.”
“Yes sir,” he salutes, pulling down his bottoms, cock sprung against the hem of his sweater. He taps the tip of his dick on your puffy bud, smiling wide as you writhe for him. “Damn, baby. I’ve never seen you this wet before.”
“It’s a good thing you came to me then, isn’t it?” Nanami mentions, wiping the sweat off his brow with the back of his hand. “Now turn around for us, princess. It’s going to feel so much better for you like this.”
You obey, readjusting your body to bend over the desk, ass pushed towards Ino, desperate to be used by them both. Your boyfriend positions his cock at your entrance, huffing, “You ready, baby?”
“Yeah. Fuck me, Ino,” you moan. “Fuck me hard.”
He glides in slowly, stretching you out little by little, easing into you. Once he’s all the way in, groin pressed to your ass, he starts thrusting at a steady pace. It increases gradually until he’s pounding away at you, hitting that sweet spot over and over until your eyes glaze over, in a total state of bliss. 
Nanami studies you, enjoying the show until he notices you staring at the bulge in his briefs, tongue lolling, practically begging for him. He smirks at you. “You want all your holes stuffed, don’t you, sweetheart?”
You nod, drool leaking from the sides of your mouth, eyes weepy, peering up at him. How could he resist such a cock hungry slut like you? Especially when you look at him like this? 
“I’m going to give you my cock then. Think you can take it?” he asks, shoving his underwear off, cock flopping against his abdomen. 
“Oh yeah, she can fucking take it,” Ino grunts, hands gripped to your hips, still fucking you with fervor. “Right babe?” He delivers a fresh slap to your ass, which echoes off the walls of the office. 
“Yeah, I can take it,” you mumble, gulping down the spit collecting on your tongue. 
Nanami hums, satisfied with your answer, inching his dick closer to your mouth. “Open up for me, sweetheart.”
You do, swallowing him until he bottoms out to the back of your throat, testing your gag reflex. He stays still, staring at you, relishing this lewd sight. “Ino, your girlfriend looks so pretty with my cock in her mouth. Don’t you agree?”
“Fuck, yeah. So fucking hot how she just takes it. She’s a good girl, always has been,” he says from behind you, spreading your cheeks open to watch himself disappear into your pussy with each thrust. 
“You’re a lucky man,” Nanami mutters, tipping your chin up, gazing into your eyes. “And you’re a lucky girl, aren’t you? Getting fucked by your boyfriend and his senpai.” Nanami begins to move, pumping himself in and out of your hungry mouth, your tongue running along the underside of his dick. 
Ino shrugs his beanie off, running his fingers through his hair, damp with perspiration. “Oh fuck, baby, you’re taking us so fucking good.”
“Like a proper slut,” Nanami adds, tracing the outline of your lips, glossy with spit, stretched around his shaft. “Do you suck his cock as good as you suck mine?” 
You nod, swallowing your gag reflex as the tip of his dick hits the back of your throat with each solid thrust of his hips. Your second orgasm approaches quickly, your pussy clenching Ino’s cock, though you can’t say anything while gobbling up Nanami’s cock, so you let it be, continuing to be spit-roasted over the desk, thirsty for their cum.  
“Fuck, I’m going to come soon,” Ino says, slowing his pace. “I’ve never…I’ve never come inside her before.”
Nanami, still relishing his blow job, asks, “Why not?”
“Too scared to get her pregnant,” he admits. It’s true; Ino always pulls out, even when you beg him to finish inside you. You appreciate that about him, but in this moment, you want nothing more than his cream pie filling you up. 
“Is she on birth control?”
“Y-Yeah.”
Once again, as if psychic, Nanami responds, “Then I’m sure she wouldn’t mind getting your load just this once. Right, sweetheart?”
Your words are muffled. Nanami pulls out, cock wet with your spit, stroking it in his fist. “What was that, princess?”
“I said yes! Give it to me, Ino!” you whine, shaking around him. 
“Fuck, are you sure, baby? You sure you want it?”
“Give it to me. Want you to breed me,” you blurt out. 
“That’s it, that’s a good girl,” Nanami coos, slapping the head of his cock on your tongue. “How about here? You want it here too?”
You glance at Ino, who’s watching. He nods, licking his lips. “Yes. Want your cum inside me, senpai,” you reply. 
He smirks, pushing himself back inside you, his length sliding on every inch of your tongue. “Good girl.”
It doesn’t take long for both men to come, Ino shooting his seed deep into your womb, stuffing you full, Nanami spurting ribbons into your mouth, guzzling down each drop. They pull out slowly, cocks sensitive now from the stimulation. You roll over onto your back, catching your breath, looking up at them with a satisfied smile on your face. 
Nanami cups your cheek in his hand, thumb brushing delicately against your skin. “Such a messy girl. I think she needs a few more lessons. What do you think, Ino?”
Your boyfriend’s eyes are blown wide, staring at the lewd sight before him, your pussy leaking with his cum, your mouth drooling with Nanami’s. “Yeah. Definitely needs more, senpai.”
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cera-writes · 2 months
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Hi! So I recently got into X Men again after watching Deadpool & Wolverine and by god do I love Gambit! I found your blog and your stuff for him is so good! I do have a request for you if you don’t mind. Could I please get a spicy first time with Gambit and fem!reader? It’s not her first time with a guy but maybe there’s been some tension building up and he wants to show her what a real man can do if you know what I mean lmao. I’ll leave it pretty open ended, I trust you’ll make something awesome! ❤️
A/N: Saaaaame! My obsession with this man is unwavering 🫦 Pairing: Remy LeBeau "Gambit" x F!Reader Tags: sex in the water, pining, fluff, shy!reader, pnv sex Summary: Reader decides to take a swim in the lake by the mansion. Having never had much luck with guys in the sexual department, Remy decides to show the reader how good it can really be and joins her in the water.
A Moonlit Dip
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The sun was just beginning to dip below the horizon, casting long shadows across the tranquil waters of the lake that nestled quietly at the edge of the X-Mansion grounds. You had slipped away from the main building, seeking a moment of solitude and perhaps a bit of refreshment in the cool water. The air was thick with the scent of pine and wildflowers, a welcome respite from the ever-present tension of mutant politics and training sessions.
As you waded into the lake, the water felt like silk against your skin, soothing the day's stresses. The gentle lapping of the waves against the shore was the only sound, save for the distant chirping of crickets preparing for nightfall. You dove under, letting the cool embrace wash over you, feeling more alive than you had all day.
Emerging from the water, you wiped the droplets from your eyes, only to find Remy LeBeau, aka Gambit, leaning casually against a nearby tree, his eyes twinkling with amusement. His usual smirk played at the corners of his lips, and he pushed off the tree, sauntering towards you. You let out an inhuman shriek, startled at seeing his face looking directly at yours. "Jesus, Gambit..." you huffed.
"Bonsoir, chérie," he drawled as he fought back the urge to laugh, his Cajun accent thickening the syllables. "Looks like I ain't the only one who knows how to find a little peace 'round here."
You felt a blush creep up your cheeks, not expecting company, especially not him. "Just needed a break," you admitted, treading water to keep yourself afloat, suddenly aware of how exposed you must look in the fading light.
Remy chuckled, removing his trench coat and tossing it aside. "Well, since you're already in d'ere, mind if Gambit join you?"
Before you could respond, he was peeling off his shirt, revealing a muscular chest that hinted at countless hours spent training and staying fit. After that came the rest of everything below the belt. Your breath caught in your throat as he stepped into the water, his eyes never leaving yours. The water seemed to part around him, as if welcoming its master back home.
"Ain't no gators in dis lake, mon cher," he teased, swimming closer. "But Remy reckon ya might have somethin' to worry 'bout anyway."
His proximity made the water feel suddenly warmer, the space between you charged with an electric tension that had been building for weeks. You remembered the lackluster dates, the guys who failed to ignite even a spark, and here was Remy, making your heart race with just a look. You'd be lying if you said you hadn't rubbed one out to just the sound of his accent alone as it filled your thoughts when you were by yourself.
"What would that be?" you managed to ask, your voice sounding faraway even to your own ears.
He closed the distance between you, his hands finding your waist beneath the water. "Me," he whispered, his lips brushing against your ear, sending shivers down your spine. "Remy seen you wit' them, chérie. Seen how d'ey couldn't hold a candle to what we could be."
His confession hung in the air, heavy and real. You turned to face him, your hands resting on his shoulders, feeling the strength beneath the smooth skin. "And what is that?" you challenged, though your voice trembled slightly.
Remy's smile was soft, almost vulnerable. "Something real, somethin' hot enough to burn away all those other cold nights." He leaned in, his lips a breath away from yours. "Let Gambit show you, belle. Lemme show you what a real man can do."
The world around you faded into insignificance as his lips met yours, soft at first, then deepening with a passion that took your breath away. His hands roamed your body, exploring, claiming, igniting fires wherever they touched. You responded in kind, your shyness melting away under his confident touch, giving in to the desire that had simmered between you both for so long.
In the water, limbs intertwined, breaths mingled, and the night seemed to hold its breath, watching the two of you explore each other with a hunger that was both new and ancient. Remy broke the kiss, trailing his lips down your neck, his hands guiding you deeper into the water, where the privacy was absolute.
"Tell Gambit whatchu want, chérie," he murmured, his voice husky with need.
You gasped as his fingers found a sensitive spot, your body arching toward his touch. "Show me," you begged, your voice breaking with emotion. "Show me everything, Remy."
With the moon as your only witness, you finally surrendered yourself to him.
With a low growl, Remy obeyed, his actions deliberate, every movement calculated to send you spiraling into pleasure. The water became an extension of his body, caressing you in ways you never imagined possible. You clung hard to him, nails digging into his skin as your world narrowed down to the sensations he elicited, the heat building within you like a dam about to break. You hissed in pleasure when he thrust even harder inside of you, feeling every inch of his hard dick throbbing inside your walls.
"Dass'it, belle," he encouraged, his voice rough with exertion. "Let go for Remy. Lemme see you fly."
And then, with a final, exquisite thrust, you did, soaring through the clouds of ecstasy, your cries mingling with his groans of satisfaction. The world came crashing back, the stars above seeming brighter, the water warmer, and Remy, more breathtaking than ever before.
He held you close, his forehead resting against yours, both of you catching your breath. "Was dat good, chérie?" he asked, his tone raw with emotion.
You nodded, unable to speak, your heart still racing from the whirlwind of sensations he had unleashed.
Remy kissed your forehead, his arms tightening around you. "We should get outta de water, cher. Night's chill settin' in."
You reluctantly had to agree.
His hand found yours as he led you out of the water, the cool night air a stark contrast to the warmth that had enveloped you moments before. The moon cast a silvery glow over the lake, making the droplets on your skin shimmer like diamonds. You shivered slightly, not from cold, but from the lingering thrill of what had just transpired between you. You'd managed to find your clothes in the dark, quickly dressing as Gambit did the same.
"Here, chere," Remy murmured, draping his coat around your shoulders. The fabric was still warm from his body, and it smelled faintly of his cologne—a mix of spice and something uniquely him. "You catch a chill, Gambit'll never forgive hisself."
You smiled up at him, feeling the weight of his concern, and more, the depth of his affection. "Thank you," you whispered, pulling the coat tighter.
He nodded, his eyes soft as they met yours. "Let's walk, yeah? Getchu warmed up proper."
Hand in hand, you strolled along the lakeside, the silence between you comfortable, filled with unspoken words. The crickets had resumed their song, and somewhere in the distance, a whippoorwill, its call echoing through the trees.
"Been wantin' to do dat for so long," Remy confessed suddenly, breaking the quiet. "Ever since dat night at the bonfire when you laughed at my terrible joke and didn't even care dat everyone else thought it was lame."
You chuckled, remembering the event he spoke of. "It wasn't that bad," you defended, though you knew he was teasing.
"Maybe not," he agreed, "but it was enough to make Remy think maybe, jus' maybe, you were different. That'chu saw me, not jus' Gambit the playboy, but Remy."
Your heart swelled at his words, the sincerity in his voice touching a place deep inside you. "I do see you," you admitted, pausing to face him under the moonlight. "All of you. The good, the bad, the Cajun charm... which I love, by the way." You'd confessed.
Remy laughed softly, his fingers brushing a strand of hair away from your face. "And here Gambit thought he was bein' subtle," he joked, though his eyes remained serious. "You deserve someone who's upfront, someone who can give you all de fire ya need, chérie."
You leaned into his touch, the vulnerability between you both palpable. "And you think that's you?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
"Gambit know it is," he replied without hesitation, his gaze unwavering. "I wanna be de one to stand by your side, through thick and thin. To show you every day whatchu mean to me."
Tears pricked at your eyes, moved by his declaration. "Remy..." you breathed, searching for the right words.
He shook his head, placing a finger gently against your lips. "No need to say anything now. Jus' think about it, yeah? Let it sink in."
You nodded, understanding his request. This was a moment to savor, to reflect upon, not to rush through with hasty words.
They continued walking, the conversation lightening as Remy regaled you with tales of his youth in New Orleans, the mischief he and his friends had gotten into, and the lessons he had learned along the way. You listened intently, enchanted by his stories, by the man himself. You didn't think it was possible to fall for him even more but he had that charm all the same.
As the path wound closer to the mansion, Remy slowed his pace, his expression turning thoughtful. "Y'know, dere's somethin' I've always wanted to show you," he said, his tone mysterious.
Curiosity piqued, you looked up at him. "What's that?"
He grinned, the familiar glint of mischief returning to his eyes. "A secret spot, up in de hills. It's where I go when I need to clear my head, or jus' feel...free."
Your interest was piqued. "Sounds magical," you mused, imagining the possibilities.
"It is," he confirmed, his hand squeezing yours. "Maybe one day soon, Gambit'll take you de're. Show you de view, letchu feel de wind in your hair."
Excitement bubbled within you at the prospect of sharing such a personal place with him. "I'd like that a lot," you admitted, smiling.
As they reached the edge of the woods, the lights of the mansion peeking through the trees, Remy stopped once more, turning to face you fully. "Tonight was...incredible," he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. "Thank you for lettin' me in, chérie."
You shook your head, unwilling to accept gratitude for something so mutual, so transformative. "There's nothing to thank me for," you insisted. "It was...perfect."
His smile widened, a flash of white teeth in the darkness. "Perfect, huh? Well, maybe next time we can aim for legendary d'en," he teased, his eyes twinkling.
Laughing, you nudged him playfully. "Oh, is that so? And what would make it legendary, pray tell?"
Remy leaned closer, his breath warm against your ear. "How 'bout we find out together?" he whispered, his voice low and inviting.
Your pulse quickened at his suggestion, the promise of what could be hanging in the air between you. "I think I'd like that," you admitted, your voice catching ever so slightly.
With one last, lingering look, Remy turned towards the mansion, tugging you gently along. "C'mon, chere. Let's getchu inside before you turn into an ice sculpture. Gambit'll cook ya up somethin' to warm your soul."
You laughed, the sound carrying on the breeze as you followed him, your steps lighter than they had been in ages. As you walked, wrapped in his coat and his affections, you couldn't help but feel that perhaps, just perhaps, this was the beginning of something truly extraordinary, like the man himself.
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delicatebarness · 2 months
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barnes' girl | prologue
Summary: Your flower delivery to a major corporation takes an unexpected turn when an encounter with the enigmatic CEO, James Barnes, leaves you feeling both intimidated and intrigued. As your paths continue to cross, you find yourself drawn into a world far removed from the peaceful confines of the flower shop.
Warning: Age Gap. Power Imbalance. Intimidation. Sexual Undertones.
Word Count: 1368
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A/N: I am incredibly ill right now and did not expect to be writing at all so I do apologize if this is terrible. - Please feel free to leave feedback or let me know where and how you want the story to continue, this is just as much yours as mine. - B
Barnes' Girl: Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in this series. | @im-alestan | @carrotlove
Everything: @hallecarey1 | @pattiemac1 | @uhmellamoanna | @scraftsku35 | @ozwriterchick | @sapphirebarnes | @rach2602 | @thetorturedbuckydepartment | @mrsnikstan
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Stepping into the bustling flower shop, the scent of fresh blooms envelops you as you start another day of deliveries. Arrangements of roses, lilies, and tulips fill the space with vibrant colors and intoxicating fragrances. Above the door, the bell softly chimes, signaling your departure into the city– A particularly exquisite bouquet in hand. An imposing skyscraper of a major corporation was today’s first destination, a rare delivery for the quaint little shop.
Carefully cradling the flowers in your arms, you navigated the crowded streets until reaching the towering building. Sleek and modern, the lobby contrasts starkly with the charming disarray of the flower shop. You couldn’t help but feel a flutter of nerves as you approached the elevators. Hearing the door ding open, you begin to step inside, unbeknownst to you that James Barnes, the CEO, was stepping out. 
Suddenly, and chaotically; the collusion causes the petals to scatter across the polished, marble floor in a kaleidoscope of colors. 
“I’m so sorry, sir!” The words spilled out in a frantic rush, and you dropped to your knees, gathering the fallen flowers desperately. Your hand shook as you tried to salvage the bouquet. Panic surging through you, your heart pounding in your chest.
Mr Barnes stood above you, a towering figure of authority and magnetism. Sharp and discerning, his eyes flickered with something unreadable as he watched you. For a moment, his expression is inscrutable, then suddenly, his lips twitch as if suppressing a smile. Your breath hitched at the intensity in his gaze, as if he was sending unspoken commands that sent a shiver down your spine. 
Giving you a momentary reprieve, he looked away, clearing his throat. Your cheeks flushed with embarrassment as you interpreted his reaction as disdain. Scrambling together the last of the petals, you muttered apologies and small comments about how your boss would be furious. 
As you manage to compose yourself, you catch sight of the now crumpled box that the flowers were in. Unbeknownst to you, Mr Barnes took a mental note of the shop’s name emblazoned on the side. You were left flustered and humiliated, convinced you had left a terrible impression on the older, powerful CEO.
~
Later that day, you were surprised to hear that he had called the shop. He explained the incident was his fault, not yours, and agreed to order flowers for the building regularly. “To brighten up the office,” he claimed, but his motives were more complex, layering with an interest that went beyond mere floral appreciation. 
The routine of delivering flowers to the building became almost comforting as the weeks passed. Yet, one morning, as you stepped into the lobby with a small bouquet of pink hydrangeas, you were unaware that he was watching, waiting for you on the cameras. The phone on the receptionist’s desk rang, echoing through the lobby, and she answered with a practiced smile. 
“Certainly, sir,” she replied, her accent thick. She turned to you after hanging up. “Mr Barnes wants you to deliver these personally today.” 
Taking the visitor key card she offered, your pulse quickened, and a mix of anticipation and dread bubbled within you. While making your way to the top floor, it was as if you could feel his gaze on you through the security cameras, a silent, omnipresent observer. The elevator doors open to the executive floor, and you step out, your grip tightening around the bouquet.
With a deep breath, you walked toward his office. The encounter of your first meeting played over and over in your mind. Ruining his suit, you felt jittery and self-conscious. Yet, as you enter his office, you see him there, every bit as intimating as you recall. His broad body was wrapped in a dark suit, attempting to look welcoming but still imposing. 
You felt small by the opulent surroundings as you hesitantly stepped further inside. “Hi… I, I’m, I brought the flowers you ordered,” your voice trembled slightly as you held up the bouquet– The vibrant pinks contrasting against the muted elegance of the office.
“Thank you, come, place them on the desk,” he instructed, his gaze never leaving yours. His voice was low, commanding yet inviting, almost like a purr.
As you made your way towards the massive glass desk, you couldn’t help but notice the way he watched your every move. His gaze followed you with an intensity that made your skin prickle. Placing the flowers down carefully, you turned to face him, your heart pounding.
You begin to thank him before his low voice interrupts. “What’s your name?” You stutter as you tell him, feeling even smaller under his intense gaze. A small, almost predatory smile curved his lips. “Such a sweet little doll, tell me, are you always so clumsy?” 
Shifting uncomfortably, you felt a heat rise to your cheeks. “I… I didn’t mean to be. It was an accident.” 
A hint of amusement glinted in his eyes, his smile widening. “Let’s hope it doesn’t happen again. From now on, bring the flowers directly to me. Understood?” 
“Y-Yes, sir,” you whispered, nodding quickly. You turn to leave, his glass of whiskey in his hand catching your eye. “I b-better get going,” you stammered, slightly moving toward the door. 
“Do you not want to join this old man for a drink?” He held out the glass toward you, the amber liquid glistening in the light.
Glancing nervously at the clock behind him, you hesitated. “I really shouldn’t… I’m still on work time.” 
Raising an eyebrow, a hint of a smile still played on his lips. “Just one drink. It won’t take long.” 
Your fingers brushed against his as your trembling hands took the glass. The contact sent a shiver down your spine. “Thank you,” you whispered, nervousness and curiosity coursing through you. 
“To unexpected encounters,” he toasted, his eyes still locked onto yours.
Taking a small sip, the warmth spreads through you. “To unexpected encounters,” you echoed, your voice barely audible. 
He watched you intently, an unspoken tension thick in the air. The walls of his office seemed to close in around you, the lighting added to the intimacy of the moment. “Tell me, doll, how long have you been working at the flower shop?” he asked, leaning back in his leather desk chair slighting. 
“About six months,” you replied, your finger tapping the glass nervously. 
“And, do you enjoy it?” he asked, his gaze never wavering.
“Yes, sir, I-I do… it’s peaceful,” you said, your heart still raced but your voice became steadier. 
“Peaceful, huh?” He tilted his head, considering your words. “Not like this place,” he added with a wry smile, his whiskey glass-filled hand gesturing around the room. The walls were lined with large abstract paintings and bookshelves filled with finance, and self-improvement books. 
Taking another glance around, you took in the grandeur of his office. “It’s… very impressive,” you admitted, your eyes returning to his. 
“Oh, you think so?” His smile widened once again, amusement dancing over his piercing blue eyes. “You don’t find it… intimidating?” 
“A little,” you confessed, your cheeks growing hotter. 
“Good,” he said, his tone serious as he leaned back again. His fingers steepled beneath his chin. “It’s meant to be. But, you, doll,” he added, his expression softening slightly, “you shouldn’t be intimidated.” 
You swallowed hard, his comments catching you off guard. “I- I should really get back to the shop,” you said, your voice barely audible again. 
“If you must,” he conceded, reluctance lacing in his voice. “But remember, little doll… I expect to see you here every week with those fresh flowers.” 
“Yes, sir,” you nodded, a strange sense of excitement and apprehension rushing through you. “I, um, thank you for the drink.” 
“Anytime, babydoll,” he replied, his eyes lingering on you as you turned to leave. 
Your heart pounded in your chest as you walked back to the elevator. The marble floors echo your footsteps, and the soft hum of the employees fills your ears. The conversation replayed in your mind, every word, every glance.
The enigmatic and powerful James Barnes had taken a particular interest in you, and you realized that your weekly deliveries were about to become much more intriguing.
---
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pprodsuga · 7 months
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while you were sleeping
summary: jay thinks he loves you best when the two of you are back together in the early hours of the morning.
notes: hi hi! totally messed up on my taglist and didn't realize i couldn't differentiate who wanted to sign up for what taglist. i'm sorry if i tagged you here and you only request my smau - please do let me know if you'd like to be removed and i'll rectify it, no hard feelings or questions asked! x
enjoy this short lil slice of life au
warnings: tooth rotting fluff
add yourself to my taglist !!
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When Jay looks down at your still figure after he’s awoken, he’s not surprised to see that you’re still sleeping. 
It’s endearing, the way your cheek is pressed against the side of his arm and the way your lips form a small pout. He’s impressed at the way the two of you have managed to somehow cling to each other in your slumber. Your hair’s rustled from a good night’s sleep and he doesn’t have the heart to wake you up. 
Jay presses a chase kiss to your temple and refrains the urge to laugh at your stone-like figure, opting to swing himself over the bed and get ready for the day. He’s no stranger to late nights and early mornings; his sleeping schedule is far beyond the point of saving and he knows there’s no use staying in bed when he isn’t planning to sleep. 
When he emerges from the bathroom, you’re still sleeping in the same position you were when he first woke up. Jay looks at you from the foot of the bed and tilts his head as if he's inspecting you, and he might as well be with his laser focus on the subtle movement of your chest rising and falling against the soft mattress below you. 
It’s not every day he gets to wake up with no alarm and with you sleeping beside him. Jay savors days like this where all he worries about is what time to start cooking breakfast to the time when you wake up. But he knows you’ll subconsciously emerge from his bedroom when the smell of the meal he’s preparing begins to echo throughout the dorm rooms. That, he knows for sure. 
Like clockwork, Jay pulls the ingredients to make a simple, warm breakfast when he closes his bedroom door shut behind him. Jake is barely awake with Jungwon on the couch in the living room when Jay begins to scroll on his phone for recipe ideas with the ingredients they have in their fridge and pantry after a last minute shopping trip. Neither of the two boys acknowledge Jay’s presence beyond a slow nod, with Jungwon rubbing the sleep out of his eyes with no luck. 
Jay’s lucky, in a sense, that jetlag doesn’t affect him too much when he returns home. He’d love to think it’s because he’d rather fight his body to stay awake in order to spend time with you until he’s whisked away on another flight to a different country. Phone calls and texts are frequent between the two of you, but it’s never enough. 
Heeseung and Sunghoon join the others on the couch and Jay’s sure he must've woken up Sunoo with the accidental bang of metal bowls. Riki’s the last to emerge, appearing slightly more awake than the rest of his members, but all six of them sit wordlessly around the common area on their phones or watching the television. 
The best thing Jay can whip up is a simple American breakfast–pancakes, eggs, and bacon with fresh fruit on the side–from the groceries you had so graciously offered to buy before they returned home. Jay had told you to buy enough to cover one meal for the next morning to survive the massive jetlag all seven of them were about to experience, but you’d gone a step beyond and had replenished their fresh fruits and small desserts as a form of a welcome home gift. It feels comforting to eat strawberries in the comfort of his own home as opposed to tasting it on extravagant cakes in some European city he’ll return to only for work. 
“Smells good,” is the only thing Heeseung says before gulping down a large glass of water. His voice is hoarse from the months spent on tour and promotions, and Jay knows how tired the eldest must be if he isn’t willing to crack a joke or two. 
Jay takes one look at his bedroom door to see that it’s still closed as he left it. He considers himself wildly lucky to have someone as compassionate and as kind as you in his life; his career path leaves little room for mistakes and the culture around dating as a public figure leaves a bitter taste in his mouth when he thinks about the beginning of your relationship. Jay doesn’t enjoy hiding you, nor does he like the fact that he isn’t free to talk about you without a moment’s notice. But you reel him in and you’re the one who reminds Jay that the world doesn’t need to know about your relationship in order for it to be real. 
Still, he thinks he asks too much of you when he kisses you in a secluded area of the airport or when he has to rush you backstage before his shows begin. 
Jay is sure the fans pick up on his changed behavior. He’s hesitant to hold hands with people he meets unless they ask him to. He ignores fan-made signs with flirtatious comments out of respect for your relationship. It irks him when journalists ask the group about their respective love lives because he can’t talk about you. Jay talks like he knows a thing or two about a thing or two, and he tries to ignore the comments on his livestreams when he converses a little too much about the meaning of love and happiness. 
His favorite moments with you are when he gets to walk around the city with a mask on his face and his hand in yours. For just a day, he can be a regular person on the streets of Seoul parading around the love he has for the person he’d love to call his life partner someday. He can make you flush in public and say things in your ear that’ll make you grab his arm just a little tighter. Jay can pretend he’s a normal twenty-year-old-something navigating his first serious relationship with the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with. 
But he also loves it when you get to travel with him and watch him perform from the crowd in a country you’ve always wanted to visit. You always insist on it and he does his best to reserve a spot for you where you’ll be able to experience his concert like the dedicated fan that you are. He loves that you meet him backstage just moments before the encore, too, and he loves when you give him a short kiss before he’s wanted back onstage to say one final goodbye to an adoring crowd that chants his name at any given moment. Jay’s proud of his work and he’s elated to know you’re proud of it too. 
His thoughts are interrupted when he hears his bedroom door creak open, after he’s put the last pancake on your stack and as he pulls the bacon to fry. Jay looks behind him temporarily, your sleepy figure wrapped in a throw blanket approaching him with a blank stare as if you haven’t had a single thought in days. 
You look cute like that. 
“Morning,” you mumble into his back with your face pressed against the fabric and your arms around his middle. You leave room enough for Jay to maneuver without having to pry your arms off of him. 
“Hi, sleepy girl.” Jay moves his head and kisses the part of your head he can reach before shifting his focus to the task at hand. “Sleep well?” 
“Like a baby.” He hears you yawn. “But you were gone when I woke up.”
“Somebody needs to feed you,” Jay chides with a smile on his face. He feels you return his smile against his back. 
“Whatever you’re cooking smells really good, baby.” 
Jay thinks he might combust with the extra squeeze you give him. It’s been nearly three months since he was able to feel you cling onto him like this. 
“Oh, yeah? I picked up a few tricks from the hotel’s chef while I was abroad.”
“Like what?” 
“I shouldn’t turn the heat up too high when cooking thin meat like bacon and scrambled eggs have better texture when you leave it sitting for a few minutes.”
“I love having a personal chef.” 
Jay chuckles deeply. You press a long kiss to his back and he closes his eyes for a brief moment. 
“Almost done,” he promises, dropping the last bit of bacon for the two of you onto a plate before turning the head off. 
“Oh shit, that bacon smells so good.” 
Sunghoon emerges from behind him and eyes the meat that’s still steaming underneath the kitchen light. Jay swats his hand when it gets too close to the bacon, but he inevitably draws the attention of the other members who are now more awake than they were twenty minutes ago. 
“Those pancakes look good,” Riki comments. You’ve let go of your boyfriend by now, who is actively trying to pull away the breakfast he’s made for just the two of you.
“Yah,” Jay says. “You guys can make your own breakfast. This one’s for me and my girl.” 
“But it smells so good and I might die of hunger,” Jungwon dramatically wines, stomach growling as if on cue. 
While Jay is bickering with Jake, who has taken it upon himself to scope through the fruit Jay has cut for you, you’ve stolen a decent-sized pancake and begin to tear it into pieces. You hand one to Riki, and then to Sunoo who has waited quietly behind the taller boy, and then to Jungwon, who looks at you as if you’ve saved him from starvation. The four of you munch on the sweet pancake while the other four boys begin to raise their voices until Sunghoon points at the four of you silently eating in front of them. 
“You wound me,” Sunghoon accuses you, hand dramatically clutching his chest when he realizes what you’ve done. “After all we’ve been through?” 
“They were hungry,” is your only defense. 
“This is preferential treatment,” Jake begins to argue with a pout.  
Heeseung’s busy putting pieces of bacon in his mouth the moment Jay looks away from the sizzling plate. It’s too late by the time the young chef realizes what’s happening. Before he knows it, half of the breakfast he’s dedicated his morning to cooking is in the stomachs of people he had not intended to feed. 
Jay looks at you with an apologetic smile despite knowing you were the one who instigated this predicament. Wordlessly, you pull the used metal bowl from the sink and rinse it before beginning to make more pancake batter. You silently coax Jay into frying up more bacon by bumping his hip with yours. 
Jungwon’s the first to thank you. He leans his head down to rest on your shoulder for a few seconds before Sunoo does the same to your other. They both leave as Riki tugs your shorter body into his from behind and lets his cheek rest against the crowd of your head, mumbling a quiet gratitude as you whisk the batter. 
Jay merely looks at you in awe after Riki detaches himself. You’re concentrating far too hard on not spilling the sweet mixture on the counter as the boys resume their time in the living room with Heeseung asking if any of them would like to play a video game while you two cook. 
“I love you,” he says before pressing a sweet kiss to your lips. 
The kiss itself is over quicker than he’d like, but you look at him like he’s the only person in the room. 
“Come on,” you say, bumping your hip with his again. “We’ve got kids to feed.” 
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so sorry to anyone who tumblr wont tag ):
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note again in case you missed it: hi hi! totally messed up on my taglist and didn't realize i couldn't differentiate who wanted to sign up for what taglist. i'm sorry if i tagged you here and you only request my smau - please do let me know if you'd like to be removed and i'll rectify it, no hard feelings or questions asked! x
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ghost-in-the-hall · 4 months
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Fall For Me (Poly! Sleep Token x Fem! Reader) - Part VIII
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Welcome back to part 8 of Fall For Me! A strange dream, reader goes to camp, and more sweet moments with the eepy Bois this chapter! Thank you so much for reading, if you'd like to be added/removed from the tag list please let me know!
WARNINGS: Brief mention on hunting practices NOT PROOFREAD
Part VII - Part IX
My Masterlist! ~ AO3 Link! ~ Tip Jar!
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When you woke up your head felt like it was in a fog, the edges of your vision slightly blurry as you looked around the room. Your bare feet dropped to the floor, you shivered as you stood from your bed, it was a lot colder in here than you remember it being. You paused at your doorway, something wasn't right. Despite the fact you had crossed the entire expanse of your bedroom there wasn't a single creaking floorboard or footstep to be heard. You look back at your bed only to find your body still laying there. “What the hell?” You mutter softly to yourself. You walk over to your still sleeping form, your shoulders rising and falling with every even breath as you lie motionless beneath the covers.
“Don't worry, you'll be able to re enter your body when we're done here.” You jumped at the sudden voice that seemed to come from nowhere and everywhere at the same time. Its tone is both a whisper and a deafening howl, the sound high pitched and somehow also impossibly low.
“God?” You ask with a confused expression.
The voice laughs, “I guess you could say that.” The silence that surrounded you was deafening as the voice faded out, it was so quiet you could hear your blood rushing in your ears, no ambient sound existed in whatever plane you had been snatched into. “Trust in Vessel, he’ll show you the way.”
You shot up in bed with a sharp gasp, your lungs burning like you had been holding your breath. Your alarm was blaring on your night stand, 8 in the morning, you had an hour until you opened. You got out of bed, listening carefully for the sound of your footsteps against the floor to make sure you really had returned from wherever the hell you had gone in your dreams. “I'm going crazy, I'm actually losing my mind.” You argue with your reflection in the mirror. “Some mysterious voice coming from my subconscious about trusting Vessel, of course I trust him. But what the hell is the way he's supposed to be showing me?” You decided to drop it for now with an annoyed groan, flying through your morning routine and jogging downstairs just as 9 o'clock rolled around. The day flew by, the steady stream of customers helping to distract you from the weird dream you had. You were just about to lock the door when the all too familiar pickup truck pulled into the lot. You smiled, pushing the door open and leaning against it as you waited to see just who had stopped by to visit tonight. You were a bit surprised to see II jump out of the cab unaccompanied, usually when he was sent to make supply runs he always had one of the others in tow. He strides over to you, reaching out to pull you into an embrace the moment you were close enough.
“I have a question for you.” He states softly once he pulls back, his hands still resting comfortably on your waist.
“And what might that be?” You smile, subconsciously leaning into him.
“Would you be comfortable coming back to camp with me?” You paused the moment the question fell from his lips. “Vessel already knows I'm inviting you, he's the one that brought it up in fact.” II chuckles, knowing exactly where your mind had wandered.
“I would love to.” He waits patiently for you to lock up, his hand slipping into yours, giving it a gentle squeeze as the two of you chat idly on your way back to the truck. You slid across the worn leather bench seat, II hopping behind the wheel not long after. He wraps an arm around your shoulders, leaning in to press a clothed kiss to your cheek.
“Are you warm enough?” You nod, letting your head fall to rest against his shoulder as he starts driving. His thumb languidly trailed back and forth across your shoulder, every so often he would glance down at you to see if you were still awake. You wound down endless back roads, slowly pushing your way down paths that had long since been forgotten until the group had ventured this far out into the woods. II attempted to dodge raised roots and potholes without much success, the makeshift road being filled with craters that rattled the pair of you around in the cab. You were thankful when the dirt path finally smoothed out, the trees opening up to reveal a large clearing with four cabins evenly spaced out around the circle. You recognized minimal details of it from the pictures you had seen in the paper. The cabin opposite the entrance was surrounded by flower beds of various sizes and states of growth, some containing a painter's palette of wildflowers, others filled with various crops that seemed to be growing very successfully. “That's IV’s cabin.” II must've noticed your impressed stare. “I will warn you though, if you compliment him on his gardening it will make him really flustered, so do with that information what you will.” He chuckles.
“Do you all have different jobs?” You ask curiously, II nods his confirmation.
“IV is the main one in charge of produce. III’s a fairly decent hunter, that's where we get the majority of the meat we eat. I’m in charge of the finances.” He lists off everyone's role around the camp. “And Vessel… well he's our spiritual advisor for a lack of a better term.” He chuckles. He pulls the truck up alongside a cabin that was more set back from the rest, it's dark wood almost blending in with the treeline.  “He’s in the middle of something, I'll take you to IV.” He smiles at you. He motions for you to wait, jogging around the front of the truck to open your door for you. He bows his head slightly as he offers his hand, you can't help but laugh softly at his actions.
“What a gentleman.” You grin at him.
“For you, only the best.” He winks. Your hand slips into his, his skin cool against yours. His eyes stay locked on your form as you hop down from the truck, the moment your feet hit the ground he's tugging you into his side, wanting to keep you as close as possible. “I'd like to be able to spend some time alone with you later, if that's alright.” The corners of your mouth quirk up in a smile at the slight nervousness you picked up in his voice. You glance up at him, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth before pushing yourself up to place a kiss to his cheek.
“I'd love to.” You whisper in his ear with a coy smile. Your attention was stolen by IV calling your name from across the clearing. II places a hand against the small of your back, gently nudging you in his direction. You meet him in the middle, giggling as he flings his arms around you and spins you in a hug.
“I missed you.” His eyes crinkle as he smiles, you found your cheeks growing warmth at the genuine joy in his voice.
“You did?” You ask softly.
“Yeah.” Goosebumps rise on your skin as you feel him gently knead at the softness of your waist. His eyes nervously dart from yours, tracing over a pattern he had found in the grass as he sucks in a deep breath. “I, um, I didn't get to say everything I wanted to you the other day.” You waited patiently for him to continue, seeing how nervous he was about choosing exactly the right words was honestly endearing in your eyes. “Do you think we could sit down and talk?”
“Of course we can, wherever you like.” You smile softly at him. He hesitantly removed his hand from your waist, carefully taking your hand and studying your reaction to make sure he wasn't doing too much too quickly. He led you to his cabin, shutting the door behind him and watching you with delight as you looked around curiously at all the small knick knacks and trinkets he had littered around the small space. His heart races when his eyes meet yours, he would never get tired of seeing the way your whole face lit up when you smiled.
“I want you to know that I really like you.” He blurts out, unable to stop the confession from coming out. “I might not be as experienced as the others, and I might take things slowly, but that's just because I don't want to mess this up.” His bright blue eyes scan over your features as he waits for you to respond.
“IV, I'm not worried about moving too slow or too fast, or whether or not you're experienced. I think you're very sweet, handsome, fun,” every compliment was punctuated with you taking another step closer to him. “I like you too, I want to see where things go, and I'm very excited to see how we get there.” He breathes out a relieved chuckle.
“I just don't want you to think that I'm not as interested as the others.” His arms slide around your waist, your instinctually slipping over his shoulders as he pulls you into him. His fingers ghost over your cheek, you lean into his touch, allowing him to carefully cradle your face in his hand. “You're so beautiful, every moment I've gotten to spend with you has been nothing short of amazing.” Your cheeks grow warm as he continues his assault of compliments. He seemed relieved to have gotten that off his chest, the usual playful glimmer returning to his expression.
“Well, I look forward to spending more time with you.” His gaze dropped to your lips for a moment before he hesitantly pulled away. He clears his throat, his eyes trailing to the window.
“Did you get to see the garden at all?” He asks, a slight nervous tremor in his voice.
“A little, but I'd love to see it up close. You have a very impressive green thumb IV.” He taps the toe of his boot against the cabin floor.
“It's nothing special.” He rebuttals bashfully. “But, it's definitely a lot better than what we started out with.” He starts to head towards the door, your hand slipping effortlessly into his as you trailed after him. He brought you to the edge of the flowerbeds, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to keep you close to his side as he pointed to all the various different types of produce and flowers he was growing, slipping in small fun facts every so often.
“I don't know how you can say this isn't anything special IV, this is incredible. You've really done an amazing job.” He froze, swallowing thickly as he looked down at you.
“Thank you, love.” He says softly. A soft smile finds its way to your lips as you watch his eyes slowly trace over your features. “Can I take you on a date sometime?” You can't help but giggle at the question.
“I would love that.” You feel him squeeze your waist, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he returns your smile. You both jumped slightly as someone shouted from across the field. II had III in tow, the taller man dropping off his pack of hunting supplies before quickly making his way over to you. IV leans down, placing a kiss to the top of your head before stepping away. You smiled as III approached, your heart immediately pounding in your chest at the sight of the streaks of sweat that had broken down his black body paint. You were unable to stop your gaze from raking across his exposed torso. Your cheeks grew warm as your eyes snapped back up to meet his, immediately noticing the playful glimmer in his expression. You nearly stumbled backwards as III’s long strides quickly landed him right in front of you, a strong hand landing on your waist to steady you as he caught your chin between his fingers with the other. Your eyes dart to anywhere but his, trying your best to hide your flustered state.
“Don’t get all shy on me now.” He chuckles. “How are you beautiful?” You manage to squeak out a ‘good’ in response. III leans down, the fabric of his mask soft against your skin as he presses a kiss to your forehead. “Have you shown her around at all?” He asked IV, his hand still lingering on your waist as he pulled away.
“Just a bit of the garden.” IV responds.
“Think we should give her the grand tour?” II suggests.
“I don’t see why not.” IV immediately perks up at the idea. You reach out, taking hold of IV’s hand, giving him a coy smile as you cuddle up to his side.
“Well, lead the way boys.” II and III share an amused look over IV’s surprised expression. It takes him a moment before he finally relaxes, giving your hand a gentle squeeze before he brings your knuckles to his lips.
It had been less than a year since they had arrived in town and the progress they had already made at their camp was nothing short of incredible. IV had grown a whole storehouse of crops, all of which were expertly preserved in order to maintain the four of them easily throughout the winter and early spring. You learned that he was hoping to learn how to make preserves out of the vast amounts of berries in the area. III showed you some of his easier to navigate hunting trails, explaining that he only hunts as needed and how important to him it is to use the entire animal whenever possible. The four of you wandered down trails, each of them pointing out spots where they would like to go to read or play music. “We should plan a day to hike out to the lake.” IV suggests.
“Maybe next summer, it’s a little too cold for that now.” II responds. “I definitely think we should at some point though, I really think you’d like it there.” You smile as III places a kiss to the top of your head, his presence at your side immediately being replaced by II who wrapped his arm around your shoulders as you continued walking. You had noticed how the three of them almost seemed to be taking turns being next to you, the thought alone was enough to make butterflies erupt in your stomach.
“I was wondering where you all went.” Your heart immediately began to race at the sound of Vessel’s voice. You turn to find him leaning in the doorway of his cabin, “love, would it be alright if I stole you for a second?” He nods for you to follow him inside his cabin.You swallow thickly, feeling nervous despite the fact you knew you had to reason to worry. You’re snapped from your thoughts by II pressing a kiss to your cheek.
“I’ll go start dinner while you’re in there.” He gives you a gentle nudge in Vessel’s direction, prompting you forward. He towered over you from his position leaning in the doorway, offering you his hand once you were in reach and guiding you inside. The inside of his cabin was simple; a small wooden desk with a chair sat in front of the window, a perfectly made bed with black sheets sat against the opposite wall, the large piece of furniture the focal point of the room. Across the room from where you stood you noticed a bookshelf tucked into the corner, the shelves filled with journals, textbooks, and various decks of cards. You could feel Vessel studying you, he watched your body language carefully, trying to gauge exactly how you were feeling in this very moment.
You jumped as he suddenly shut the door, a soft chuckle escaping him at the sight. “There’s no need to be so tense, love.” He steps up to your side, trailing a finger along the edge of your jaw as he leans down close to your ear. “I’m not that scary, am I?” He purrs, sending a shiver down your spine.
“I’m just a little on edge today, I guess.” You laugh softly.
“And why’s that?” He keeps you close to him as he moves. Settling himself on the edge of his bed, his hands coming comfortably to rest on the curve of your waist as he holds you in front of him. You feel his fingers gently push into you, moving you closer to him without much effort. The front of your thighs presses against the edge of his plush mattress, Vessel’s long legs caging you in on either side. You still had to look up slightly to be face to face with him, knowing you had met his eyes behind the slits of his mask as your heart began to pound in your chest.
“I have a feeling you already know the answer to that.” Your voice trembled as you spoke.
“Smart girl,” he praises, “I see you’re putting the pieces together quickly.” He ponders over what to say for a moment, carefully selecting each word in his mind. “He spoke to you last night, didn’t he?”
“Vessel, what was that?” You answered his question with your own.
“That was Sleep.” He states simply. A bewildered expression formed on your face, Vessel continued speaking before you had a chance to ask any questions. “I for the life of me can’t figure out how to even begin telling you about Sleep.” He admits with a bashful chuckle. “I hate to keep you in the dark, but can I please ask you to wait just a little while longer?” The booming voice echoed in the back of your mind. ‘Trust in Vessel, he’ll show you the way.’ 
“I trust you.” Your voice comes out barely above a whisper.
“When the time is right I’ll tell you everything, you have my word.” He promises, his hand gently cupping your cheek, his thumb trailing slowly across your skin. The cool material of his mask comes to rest against your forehead. He just held you for a moment, both of you relaxing into the comfortable silence that surrounded you. “I shouldn’t keep you too long, the others will throw a fit.” He says quietly, both of you dissolving into soft laughter.
“Vessel,” he hums in response to you saying his name.
“What is it, love?”
“I really enjoyed our time together the other night.” He froze, seeming almost dumbfounded by the words that had left your mouth.
“You did?” His response comes out timidly, as if he was dancing around those two simple words, worried it was the wrong thing to say. “Maybe… Maybe we could do something like that again sometime then.”
“I’d like that.” You smile softly at him.
Your fingers remained linked with his as he led you across the clearing, the other three members of the group working quickly to make sure everything was set up by the time you reached the table. You were handed a plate of something you didn’t recognize, but it tasted good. Your night became a blur of stolen kisses on your cheeks and laughter that easily bubbled up from your chest. “I believe II had something planned for the two of you tonight.” Vessel suddenly chimes in. “I think we should probably give them some privacy, boys.” He suggests with a patient smile. They each say their respective goodbye’s; IV pressing a chaste kiss to your cheek, telling you he’ll see you soon before darting off to his cabin, III pulls you flush against him, lifting his mask just enough to capture your lips with his own. He mumbles a quiet ‘goodnight’ against your lips, his hand lingering on the curve of your waist as he pulls away. You turned to face Vessel, he held out his hand for you to take. “I’ll walk you.” It didn’t take you long to see that II had snuck off to set up a fire, a log pulled the perfect distance away from the flames to sit on. “It looks like you’re in for a nice evening.” You could feel his eyes studying you from behind his mask. “It’s a shame we have to part ways.”
“We still have a couple minutes.” Your eyes dart down to his lips momentarily.
“It almost sounds like you don’t want me to leave.” He responds with a lopsided grin.
“I don’t.” Vessel presses a knuckle below your chin, tilting your face up to allow him the chance to study your features closely.
“Trust me love, if I had it my way I already would have stolen you for myself.” He chuckles, his thumb swiping over your bottom lip. “We’ll have our time… I’ll make sure of it.” He whispers. He cradles your face gently in his hand, his eyes wandering over your features in silence for another moment before he speaks again. “II, make sure she gets home safely.” You hadn’t noticed until Vessel had startled him that II had wandered back in your direction. “Have a good night, beautiful.” A pair of warm lips press against your forehead, and just like before, as quickly as he was there he was gone. A sense of longing ached deep in your chest, one that was quickly pushed down as II’s hands came to rest on your waist. He gently turns you to face him, hand cupping your cheek as his lips ghost over yours. Your eyes flutter shut, your racing thoughts coming to a screeching halt as you let the kiss consume you.
“I’ve been waiting all day to do that.” II mumbles against your lips with a soft chuckle. Heavy, warm fabric is draped across your shoulders, your fingers instinctually reach up to rub along the edge of the thick denim jacket. “I wanted to make sure you were warm enough. It’s a nice night, but it still gets pretty cold out here.” You found yourself cuddled into his side, the campfire keeping you comfortable despite the chill in the air. II excitedly pointed out every constellation he recognized, filling your mind with tales of adventure, the bravest heroes, the most passionate of love stories. “Right there, that’s Andromeda. She’s famous for nearly being eaten by a sea monster because her mother tried to say she was more beautiful than the sea nymphs.” You can’t help but laugh slightly at the absurd story.
“Well, what do you think?” II gives you a curious glance. “Was she prettier than the sea nymphs?”
“She definitely wasn’t as pretty as you.” You stuttered out a shocked sound in response, your cheeks immediately growing warm. “You’re really bad at accepting compliments.” He points out bluntly, a hint of a smile in his tone.
“I’m just not really used to getting them I guess.” You admit with a bashful chuckle.
“You’re unfortunately going to have to get used to that then.” He glances down at you, his bright blue eyes meeting yours and freezing you in place. “You’re beautiful, I’m not about to let you forget that.”
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lucienarcheron · 4 months
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Spirit Meets the Bones XXII
Genre: Angst/Romance/Drama Warnings: Mentions of physical abuse. Please note: There will be heavy subjects discussed that may be triggering.
*This chapter was previously part of chapter 21 (which again, was 30 pages?? insane) and as I have been editing and reuploading the chapters, I have since decided to split chapter 21 into two. 
shoutout to @abruisedmuse for being my number one on this journey!
tagging: @climb-the-mountian / @vanserrass / @zenkindoflove / @animezinglife / @teddyhoneybear / @readthelastpaage / @positivewitch / @krem-does-stuff / @clockwork-ashes / @carolynmezzosoprano / @carnythian / @runningwiththeoceans / @secret-third-thing / @readychilledwine / @goldenmagnolias / @thedarkinmansfield / @mali22 / @maidr-00 / @electromagnetic-waves / @eastofatlanta / @moobell55 / @bibliophiliaxvignette / @devilsfoodcake22 / @moonfawnx / @weesablackbeak / @ladywhilemia / @alohaangels / @eachies / @feysandfeels / @thelovelymadone / @corcracrow / @dawneternal / @sinnerrsworld / @gracie-rosee / @stormycleric / @queenofnothing1998 / @wolvesnravens / @theeternalstruggle / @the-midnightwriter / @illyrianvalkyrie / @that-golden-lyre / @ladystarrynight
Find it all here.
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Something was wrong. 
Iris had started to sense it not too long after Eris had left; a sense of unease worked its way through her chest and twisted in her gut.  She tried to brush off the worry — today had been a whirlwind and Finn showing up suddenly was probably adding to the stress she was already feeling. Eris would be fine. He should be fine. Even if he was taking longer than she expected. 
She let herself focus on other things while she waited, mindlessly tidying the room, washing up for bed, and lastly, actually choosing something she deemed indecent to wear to bed.
It was a beautiful olive-green gown, the material satin with lace trimmings that seemed to have been made for her, hugging her body in a way she knew would send her husband into a nice little spiral. Or, at least she hoped it would. It was also much shorter than she’d ever worn around Eris, barely reaching her midthigh, and that — well, that made her a little more nervous than she’d like to be.
It was just skin after all. She’d gradually been showing him a little more skin with each new set but never…never this much. Iris flushed deeply and then frowned at her reflection.
“Get over yourself,” she mumbled. “It’s not like you don’t want him to touch you.” 
Because she did. If his kisses were any indication, Eris would likely be the death of her, and that had her feeling very nervous. But she had a nice long robe that would make her feel more secure. 
At least until they talked and she got answers to her questions. 
Today had been challenging in its own way but this moment, choosing to be a little more intimate with him…this was for her. For the way he had been making her feel the past few weeks. For the way his eyes always watched her with just a little hunger and a whole lot of amusement. 
But mostly…it was for the way his voice had dropped when he had made his request earlier. He had asked so politely. It would be bad manners to refuse. 
If he’d just hurry up and come back already.
Iris had been standing in front of the vanity, fidgeting slightly with the thin strap of her nightgown when a sharp tug to her ribcage had her freezing. A gasp left her lips as she steadied herself and the dread she had been trying to keep at bay came back in full force. She felt panicked. She felt — she felt pain.
Something was wrong and she didn’t understand what that was. That — that tug.
With shaking hands, she quickly slipped the robe over her gown and tied it firmly, rushing to her door and yanking it open. 
She staggered to a halt in the doorway when one of Eris’s commanders turned to face her and she blinked in surprise. 
“Oren?” she asked and straightened. “What’s going on? Why are you here?”
The general took a moment to scan the hall, empty except for the two of them then took a small step towards her and gave her a tight smile. “His Royal Highness, Prince Eris wished for you to have some additional protection at this time,” Oren said calmly but Iris’s heart stuttered in her chest. She didn’t miss the usage of the formal title, especially when Oren and Eris were considered friends.
“Where is he?” she demanded. “He was supposed to be meeting with Finn earlier. Has something happened?”
The tight smile remained on Oren’s face.  “The High Lord requested him earlier. He sent me here before he went.”
Iris inhaled sharply, her grip tightening on the doorframe as another sense of unease washed over her. “I knew something was wrong,” she said quietly and Oren narrowed his eyes at her.
“What do you mean?”
“Something is wrong. I can feel it.” Iris said and rubbed a hand to her forehead. “I’m going to change then go find —”
“I can’t let you leave,” Oren stated and Iris froze.
“Excuse me?”
Oren winced and Iris cocked a brow as he took a breath. “I am under orders to watch over you,” he said more gently. “Until he returns from his meeting with the High Lord.”
“He’s never had someone stand guard when he meets with the High Lord,” she said quietly, and again, she felt that flutter of panic as Oren’s lip thinned. 
“It seems, the High Lord is angrier than usual.”
Iris bit her lip and then let out a breath. He was angry with Eris and Iris knew without a doubt, it had to be because of her. Because of her horrible father. “Fuck.” she mumbled and Oren gestured gently to the room behind her. 
“I suggest you wait inside.”
“How am I supposed to wait when I know that —” she began then cut herself off in frustration, knowing she couldn’t say anything about the High Lord that wouldn’t get back to him. “How can I just wait when I’m telling you I can sense something is wrong!”
Oren gave her a look she didn’t quite understand then again, gently said, “I know it might be hard to wait but it’s better for you and him that you stay here. He’ll worry about you less.”
Worry about her. As if she cared about herself at this moment. Knowing what she knew about Beron, she wouldn’t be surprised if he was tearing into Eris for not beating Iris alongside her father. She ran a hand through her hair and bit her lip, holding back a string of curses. 
The High Lord needed Eris. Surely, he wouldn’t do anything — but Iris immediately shook her head. The High Lord would do whatever he wanted to his son. 
And she could do nothing to protect him. 
Shame and anger coiled in her stomach and Iris wished there was more she could do — anything she could do other than sit here and wait.
She glanced at the commander once more who only gave her a nod. She sighed.
“You don’t have to wait outside. I’ll be fine,” she said quietly. “No one can come in here without my permission.”
Oren gave her a small smile. “I know. But I am loyal to one male and one male only,” he said. “And I will do as he requested of me.”
Iris watched Oren carefully. So it seemed he knew all about Eris and the way things were with the High Lord. He’d also been a friend and commander of his for so long…but she had to ask, “Why?”
The corner of the commander’s mouth shifted up. “Because I see what he’s been trying to do. And I believe in him,” he said then gestured with his chin behind her again. “I’ll be here if you need anything until he returns.”
Knowing she’d been dismissed, Iris turned to go back into her rooms. Oren had distracted her briefly but as she slowly shut the door, her hands started to shake again. She couldn’t help the guilt threatening to consume her, couldn't help the twist in her gut. How long would Beron keep his son? What would he do to him?
Her eyes flickered to the grandfather clock sitting in the corner of their living space and she frowned. It was already so late in the evening. How much longer would this meeting take?
But an hour went by. Then several more. 
And Iris spent the time pacing around their room, fighting back her anxiety and holding herself back from running past Oren and finding her husband herself. 
She had been seated, curled up on their bed trying and failing to distract herself when she heard the familiar thud of their door closing and leaped to her feet.
“You took so long! I started to think —” Iris started but the rest of the words died in her throat at the sight of Eris in front of her. 
Heat filled the room almost immediately as Iris halted a few feet away from him. 
Her husband stood before her and Iris wasn’t sure where to look. At the now tattered jacket somehow still on his body. At the blood dripping from him. Or his hair that now barely reached the nape of his neck. She couldn’t stop staring, her heart rate increasing at the cold detachment on his face and the dead look in his eyes that set her on edge. 
Iris tried to swallow, to hold back the horror and panic going through her body, to calm her shaking hands.
“What — what happened?” she asked carefully, taking a step closer to him. Eris’s gaze dropped to her feet and the step she took closer to him then back up to her face. 
A beat of silence passed. Then another. Eris watched her, barely blinking and Iris didn’t dare move or say anything more as her fingers curled into the fabric of her robe. 
Slowly and without saying a word, Eris gestured to his body, to the state he was in, and Iris tried to keep her expression from falling, tried to curb the slight panic clogging in her throat. Once again, Eris only glanced down and then back up at her but this time, she saw wildfire in his eyes. The room’s temperature spiked and Iris felt her chest tighten as anger surged around them. 
Eris wasn’t angry, no. He was seething. Fuming.
He took a step towards her, his hands clasped behind his back and her heart started to beat frantically at the flame that licked at his heels. 
“Eris,” she started gently. “Tell me what happened.”
The Prince of Autumn cocked his head as his wild eyes watched her and Iris knew whatever had happened, whatever the High Lord had done to him, it was bad enough that Eris had gone someplace far, far away. And her Eris was not back yet. 
His eyes narrowed on her and Iris couldn’t find it in her to say anything more, her body tensing instead. She wanted him to say something, anything to fill the silence between them, where the only sound she could hear was the frantic beating of her heart. Her husband had not returned as he had left and she wasn’t sure if he fully would. She wasn’t sure what to do with herself that would help him, that would ease whatever was going through his mind right now.
It was as she opened her mouth once more that Eris moved, taking one step towards her and Iris paused. She willed herself not to flinch as his hands lowered from behind his back and knew Eris had clocked the movement. His hands wouldn’t hurt her but it still didn’t stop her from watching them carefully.
They watched each other silently. 
And Eris wanted to reply to her question, to speak, but he was having a hard time trying not to vomit. He was having a hard time trying to remember how to breathe properly. He had lost consciousness at some point enduring his father’s wrath and had woken up to find himself lying in his own blood. He didn’t remember being untied, and he didn’t know how much time had passed, but he knew he needed to check on his mother. He knew he needed to get back to his wife. 
So Eris had forced himself to stand on trembling legs, his wits barely about him. He forced himself to leave the throne room and muster what willpower he had left to winnow in front of his parent’s chambers. And Eris had waited, barely able to stand as his blood dripped from him to hear something, anything to indicate that his mother was alright. But Eris had heard nothing and he didn’t know if the deafening silence was worse than the cries of pain he had expected. Only when black dots began to line his vision had he finally forced himself to winnow once more to his own door. 
He had waved off an alarmed Oren and allowed himself a moment to compose himself before walking in and standing as he stood now.
And he really, really wanted to hurl his guts because Iris was looking at him in a way he wasn’t used to in a moment like this. No one usually saw him like this. He mostly let himself go numb during his father’s unleashing and then, only when he was alone, did Eris let his anger consume him. But he had already been teetering on the edge today and he was no longer alone. 
Iris said nothing as he stood there, only watching him with a level of concern that made his chest feel tight. She cared. She cared about what happened to him. She was not his father and she was not looking at him with anything but genuine concern and everything in him recoiled at the fact that she had to see him this way at all. That his father had put him in this position, to look weak and it made him so angry that Eris went momentarily blind with rage. 
He forced himself to swallow and then do it again before he could unlock his jaw enough to speak.
“My father,” he began in a voice that wasn’t quite his and the flames licking his heels spiked up. “Wanted to give me a new look.” He held up a bloodied fist. “He suggested I choke you with what was left of this.”
Iris dropped her gaze to his hand holding — clutching strands of hair that was — she looked up at his face again then back down to his hand. 
“Oh gods.” she mumbled and her heart sank to the pits of her stomach. What had the High Lord done to him? Or rather, what hadn’t the High Lord done to him? Iris took another hesitant step toward him and started to say, “Let me —” 
But immediately, Eris held his other hand, halting her in place and Iris fell silent. His eyes didn’t leave the hand holding the strands of his hair.
He finally glanced up at her, that wildfire in his eyes. “I told him to fuck off, of course.” he continued. “He didn’t take that well.” His gaze dropped again and Iris’s eyes followed to where a few drops of blood had dripped by his feet. She couldn’t even tell where it was coming from. “He didn’t take many things well during our conversation.”
“Conversation,” she repeated faintly and her face fell at the way his own hands had started to shake. “The state that you’re in is the result of a conversation.”
Eris fell silent again, blinking down at his trembling hands. A part of him wished he’d evaporate, simply melt into the floor, and cease to exist. Maybe then he wouldn’t feel this way. Maybe then he wouldn’t have to think about how much this family had been through and how much more they’d have to suffer until his fucken father died. Maybe then he wouldn't have to worry about his wife being another body for his father to beat down. 
Maybe then —
“Eris?” 
He looked up at her gentle calling, so unlike the voice of his father who had spent the past few hours breaking him. The way she looked at him made him want to collapse.
He was bleeding and broken and there was no logical reason for it other than his father was a monster.
“How — how did you even walk the halls like this?” she finally asked and couldn’t help how choked her voice sounded, couldn’t help that she had to keep breaking his silence. Her own hands were shaking as she moved closer to him. “Let me help you — let me see wherever you’re bleeding from.”
Eris shook his head and tried to breathe. She cared and it was too much for him. He couldn’t do this now — he needed more time.
But even if he wanted to, that thread at his ribcage forced him to stay where he was. How could it not when he looked at her and it steadied him? That thread that had dragged him back here, to this room. That thread was the reason he hadn’t let his fire consume him.
It took him another moment to speak, his eyes unblinking as he watched her. “I shouldn’t be able to winnow directly in the House, you know,” he said with a hoarse laugh and swayed slightly. “But stubborn as I am, I can bend the magic to my will.” He pointed a bloody finger at her. “I think it has to do with you.”
This rooted Iris to where she stood. “With me?” she repeated in a whisper. 
“With you,” he confirmed and lowered a trembling hand to his side, his eyes unfocused. “I had to come back to you. You were waiting for me.”
Iris’s mouth trembled and she tried to swallow back the cascade of emotions surging through her body at his words. “What can I do?” she pleaded. “What do you need right now to make this moment easier?”
“What do I need.” he repeated and his eyes fell back to his hands. Iris watched his grip tighten until a flame burst in his fist and what was left of his hair was no more. Eris shook his head again, his chest rising and falling as he tried to breathe. Her face fell as he backed a step from her, both fists aflame now. “You shouldn’t be near me right now.” he said and his gaze flickered up, his wild eyes watching her. “I — I am not — I don’t —”
What was left of her battered heart broke further. He was physically standing before her but Iris could see the struggle in his eyes to connect to their reality.  She wanted to reach him. She needed to reach him and remind him, that he was hers and she would take care of him the way he took care of her.
“It’s okay.” she said as gently as possible and slowly reached out a hand. “Let me help you.”
“Don’t.” Eris snarled so viciously that Iris couldn’t stop the flinch this time, yanking her hand back immediately. 
A thick silence filled the room once more and Iris watched her husband’s chest rise and fall, his breathing starting to turn shallow, those wild eyes watching her in an almost pained resolve at her reaction.
“You flinched from me.” he said, the words barely distinguishable.
Iris swallowed and she hid her trembling hands in the folds of her robe. “It’s alright.” she said softly and saw the way he shuddered at the two words. “You — you surprised me. That’s all.” 
He took a step towards her and Iris froze, waiting as he breathed more deeply, the flame licking his body seeming to flare and then shrink with each breath. “I’m — I’m sorry.” he said, his voice guttural. “I need — I — I need —”
“You need a moment.” she said as his body shook and she fought every instinct to reach out again. She — she wanted to hold him, needed to. But he wasn’t there yet. He was still finding his way back to himself. So she tried to reassure him from their six feet of distance. “That’s alright. Why don’t you go change?”
He nodded and blinked at her, his gaze still unfocused. “Shower.”
“Okay.” she said and nodded carefully. “I’ll — I’ll ask for some tea.”
But her husband just stared at her. “Don’t go anywhere.”
“I won’t.”
“Stay.” he said then repeated, “Don't go anywhere.”
Iris gave him a tentative smile, trying and failing to hide how deep her worry ran. She tightened her grip on her robe so she wouldn’t reach out to him again. “I’m not going anywhere, Eris. I’ll be right here when you’re done.”
She watched him as he watched her and again felt that tug in her ribcage that she didn’t understand as Eris swallowed hard then slowly, as if he was forcing himself to, he walked away from her and into their bathroom.
The door shut behind him and Iris’s face fell. How badly had that…conversation gone? She had no doubt her own father had played a part in it after the way Eris humiliated him but to what extent? How many more gifts had Beron given Eris? Letting out a shaky breath, her eyes fell to the drops of blood that had left a trail behind him.
An icy rage blinded her momentarily and Iris wanted nothing more than to find the High Lord and stab him violently until he choked on his own blood. Until he had enough wounds to make up for the ones he put on his son even if it would never be enough. The world would be a better place when the time came and he was gone. 
The sound of the water running had her blinking back to reality and Iris forced herself to snap into action and move. 
It didn’t slip her mind that earlier in the day, their situations had been the opposite and Iris wanted nothing more than to erase the anger and the shame that tied both of them to shitty fathers. 
She knew Eris was…not himself yet. She knew he needed a way back and Iris needed to believe that there was a way out of this — this darkness they were surrounded in. There had to be. 
No one deserved to live like this and as she wiped away any signs of his bleeding heart, Iris knew she would give him whatever he needed. Anything that would be a bright light for him on an otherwise dark night. So she had the tea tray ready with a bottle of hard liquor seated right next to it. Most importantly, she had tried to discreetly have her healing salves ready if he felt comfortable enough for her to touch him. 
She waited, too restless to sit, and paced between the sitting table and hovering by the door of the bathroom, listening in case — Iris wasn’t sure in case of what but was sure she wanted to be close by. 
Iris had just moved away from the door again when it finally opened and she immediately turned to find Eris standing in his sleeping attire. She tried not to frown at how tense his body still was and her eyes roamed his face.
“I have the tea.” she said quietly. “And um, alcohol.”
The corner of his mouth ticked up a millimeter before his expression shifted to the blank one she hated and he walked over to her, stopping a few feet away.
She waited, letting him take his time as he glanced down at his feet and then back up at her, his anger still lingering around him.
He watched her, his hands at his sides. “I made you flinch away from me.”
“You were angry.” she said simply. 
“I would never harm you, Iris.” 
His tone offered no argument and the corner of her own mouth curled up. Anger towards her had typically only meant one thing but she knew, deep in her weary bones, that Eris would never hurt her. 
So Iris took a step closer to him and made sure she met his gaze as she replied in a tone that also offered no argument, “I know.” she said. “Your anger wasn’t towards me.”
His nostrils flared at the reminder and Iris almost regretted saying anything but then he took another step closer to her. “No. It wasn’t,” he said and Iris let her gaze drop to his hands that were clenching and unclenching at his sides. “After…events like this, I usually…am alone. To process.”
The words, the resignation in them, made her ache. Iris wondered how many times he’d had to process alone, with no one to share this burden with.
She looked up again and took one more step toward him as she slowly held out her hands. “Well, you’re not alone anymore,” she said quietly and watched as his gaze dropped to her open hands. “I’m here.”
“Yes. You are.” he said so softly that it made Iris’s heart twist. It took him a moment and she felt his hesitation, as if afraid to touch her but she waited. She waited as he clenched and then unclenched his hands once more before he slid his hands into hers. 
“I’m here to listen if you want to talk about it,” she said as softly as he had spoken. “If not, I’m still here.”
His grip on her hands had tightened and she watched as his breath quickened for a moment, working his jaw. “I will. I have to,” he said hoarsely. “Or I will lose my mind.”
“Okay.” she simply said even as her chest tightened at the slight tremble in his hands. “I can’t have you losing your mind over anything except me, can I now?”
Eris tried to smile at her but it turned more into a grimace and Iris gave him a small smile of her own, wanting to bring him some sense of ease. She glanced down at their intertwined hands and let her thumb caress the back of his hand gently. “I don’t think I ever actually told you but…” she met his gaze. “I like how your hands feel holding mine. I have since that day I met the puppies for the first time and you told me I have lovely hands.”
She watched the Prince of Autumn shudder at the words and it took him another moment before he could answer her. “Not puppies,” he said and Iris couldn’t help her small smile, especially as he continued in words so quiet, she almost missed them. “I like how your hands feel in mine too.” 
“I bet you do.” she said and again, the corner of his mouth lifted but this time, it remained curled up, and again, Iris couldn't stop staring at him. He may look a little different with the sloppy cut he had been given but it didn’t change the feeling that was spreading in her chest. She loved it when he smiled, especially if she was the reason. She liked his wicked mouth too much. 
Iris made to move towards the table but Eris’s grip tightened on her and she turned to find his expression tense, his body rigid.
“Don’t go.”
“I’m only getting you a drink.” she said gently and Eris swallowed then gave a small nod and squeezed her hands once more before reluctantly letting go. Iris couldn't help the way she softened at the way he watched her, as though she was his tether to his way home. 
How many times had he needed someone but had suffered alone? How many times had she been in the same scenario? It made her wonder how often had they shared a moment like this in their separate lives…two sides of the same miserable fucken coin indeed.
The thought exhausted her and with a swallow, Iris pulled away to turn to the table, feeling his eyes on her. As if she’d disappear if he blinked. She opted for the alcohol and filled both teacups to the brim. She may have the power to heal but with wounds that ran as deep as her husband’s…she wasn’t sure if she would be enough. 
She carefully handed him his teacup and stood opposite him as they glanced at one another. 
They did so much watching one another. So much observing. They exchanged so much without saying a word and Iris wondered if he could hear the way her blood was pumping so loudly in her ears. If he knew she could hear the rapid beating of his heart. 
She gestured with her chin. “Drink.”
He glanced down at the cup in his hand and then looked up with a quirked brow. “This isn’t tea.”
“I think we need something a little stronger tonight.” she said gently and Eris gave her a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes before lifting the cup in a mock salute and knocking it back. 
Iris switched their cups and handed him hers with a small smile at the dry chuckle that escaped him before he drank it as well. But her expression immediately fell as his body gave a shudder followed by a small grunt of pain and Iris’s grip tightened on her cup.
“I’m sorry.” she whispered and the apology seemed to dim any momentary lightness Eris had experienced. 
“For what.” he said dryly. 
“For whatever happened. For all of it.” she continued and Iris tried not to fidget beneath his gaze. “For anything that I might’ve had to do with it.”
Eris stared at her in silence, his expression tight, and the only sound in the room was the tapping of his fingers against his cup. What seemed like a lifetime later, he reached out to take the empty teacup from her hands and turned from her to place them back on the table.
He stood like this for several quiet moments and it made Iris tense again, wondering if he needed more time. If she should’ve backed off and let him be alone. Even if that was the last thing she wanted to do. She wanted —
“My father wanted you with me for this little meeting.” Eris finally said and Iris blinked. 
“Why?”
Eris turned to face her again and leaned against the table. She didn’t miss the way, a second later, he moved a slight inch to avoid his back making contact. 
“You see,” he began and glanced down at his hands. “He found out about my lovely encounter with your father and didn’t quite like that.” His hands slowly clenched into fists as he spoke. “The High Lord wanted you on your knees apologizing to your father. At your father’s request, of course.”
“What?” she croaked.
“But my father also wanted me to apologize to your father for beating him. Because I did it for you,” he said and then gave her a dry smile. “And well, the High Lord can’t have his son beating people for his wife now, can he? The only person the High Lord’s son should be beating is his own wife.”
Iris’s fingers dug into the folds of her robe as anger and shame washed over her once more. For the audacity of her father and the cruelty of his. 
“He doesn’t deserve an apology,” she said through clenched teeth. “He deserves death.”
“I agree.” Eris said and he slowly made his way over to her, the room heating again with each step. “Which is why my father tied me to a flogging pole and whipped me within an inch of my life. Because I told him that my wife apologizes to no one and I certainly do not apologize to anyone either, especially filth.” he snarled softly and straightened with an angry wince. “So do me a favor? Do not apologize for their choices ever again. My wife doesn’t apologize for things she had no hand in.”
Horror slammed into her as she stared at Eris, fully engulfed in his own flame. At the way he had so casually admitted what his father had done.
“He — he whipped you?” she whispered and watched his body tense again, the temperature in the room spiking once more. 
“Yes. But before that, I broke both of your father’s legs and his face again.” he said and Iris saw his fists clench again. “So that makes us somewhat even.”
“Eris…” She couldn’t think of anything else to say. How can he ask her not to apologize when she was the reason he was hurt? When it was because of her father that he had been pulled so far away from himself.
And she hated how it fell silent between them again. She hated that he felt this way. That he was made to be feeling this level of anger and despair. As if every word that fell from his mouth took too much effort, too much work. 
Iris hadn’t realized how desperately she wanted to make him feel better. To bring back that stupid smirk she pretended to hate so much. She wanted to —
“Don’t look at me like that.” he said so tiredly and it made her ache. With a shake of his head and a deep breath, his flame went out, and he turned away from her, moving towards their bed. 
But Iris froze and every single thought emptied from her head. 
With his back to her, Eris’s shirt had clung to his skin and tiny beads of blood peppered the white shirt. 
He looked over his shoulder, meeting her horrified gaze, and immediately looked away from her, his shoulders tensing as he lowered himself to sit at the edge of the bed.
“Don’t.”
“Eris, you’re bleeding again.” 
“I know.” he managed then rubbed a hand down his face. “Just please stop looking at me like that.”
Iris bit the inside of her mouth, outraged on his behalf and hating that he felt embarrassed by any of it. She willed herself to breathe. One breath in, one breath out. They couldn’t catch a break. A small dosage of time where they could just be. Where everything between them didn’t have to get so fucken hard the moment they found a little ease.
“Look at you like what?” she finally said and made her way over to him. She sank down next to him and knew her expression gave away the panic she was trying to control. “Like I’m disgusted with what happened to you? Like I’m horrified  that your father hurt you because of me and my piece of shit father?” 
She stared at him and waved a hand helplessly. “How else am I supposed to look at my husband who left me in one way then came back another?” she added softly. “How else am I supposed to look when I want to help you so badly but I’m unsure how?”
Iris watched his throat bob as he swallowed. “Careful, wife. You sound like you care about me.” he said and Iris let out a huff of frustration, glaring at him. 
“I do care, you stupid bastard.” she muttered, flushing deeply, and the dead look in his eyes was given a short reprieve when he gave her a small smile. 
“Good to know.” he said and then fell silent, the weight of this whole day and what was left unsaid suffocating. 
As Iris watched him, she was hit by the need to kiss him. The need to run her hands down his arms and chest and scarred back that she wanted to help him heal and then kiss it all better. She wanted anything but whatever this heaviness was, anything but that awful expression on his face. Her eyes scanned his slightly ruffled hair and how tired his eyes were and her frown deepened.
Slowly, she reached out a hand to gently touch his face, giving him all the time in the world to push her hand away if he desired. But he didn’t and Iris turned his head so he’d face her and his exhaustion slammed into her.
“What happened was unacceptable.” she whispered. “And for that, I am sorry that it happened to you. Because you don’t deserve it. You didn’t do anything wrong and he had no right to treat you that way.” 
Eris scoffed faintly but at her expression, swallowed hard, closing his eyes. He seemed to hesitate for a heartbeat then nuzzled gently into her hand. He hated how desperately he needed the softness of her touch. How badly he wanted to be soothed. She was here and even if he felt like death itself, she was here. “No one deserves what he delivers.” he finally said quietly. “But we still take it.” 
“You should not have to.” 
“No.” he said and straightened with a grimace, taking her hand in his hand. He let his thumb caress her palm as he added, “None of us should have to.”
“Please let me look at your back,” she whispered but he shook his head, his thumb still rubbing her hand gently. Whether it was to soothe him or to soothe her, she wasn’t sure. "Please. Let me heal it."
A muscle in his jaw flexed and Iris had to remind herself that his anger wasn't at her.
“I can heal it myself,” he replied but not unkindly. “I’m choosing not to at the moment.”
“Why?”
“Pain is good. It keeps the memory fresh.”
Once again, the room heated at the words and Iris’s body went rigid. He was so angry and gods, she knew that anger. She had tasted the humiliation he felt. And she knew without question that beneath that anger was so much sadness. So much exhaustion. So much…yearning. For more. For different.
For love. For some sense of normalcy in a fucked up home that showed them no mercy. 
Iris could practically hear his mind whirling and it pulled at her heart because she had started to understand him in a way very few people did. Slowly, she reached out once more and gently forced him to meet her gaze.
“There is no part of you that deserves pain like this, Eris.” she said firmly and hated the way she could see his disbelief, as though it wasn’t true. 
Eris’s eyes fluttered closed at the words, a muscle flexing in his jaw. “How do you know that? That I don’t deserve pain? I’ve made bad choices. I’ve had to do bad things.”
She shook her head. “Making bad decisions and being forced to do bad things doesn’t make you a bad person. You’ve had to carry so much…give yourself some room.” she said and then added quietly, “Unburden yourself with me. Let me help you.”
Eris met her gaze and she watched the internal struggle in his eyes as he worked his jaw. Finally, he said, “There’s too much. It’s a lot.”
“I know. You were ready to tell me earlier. So tell me now.” she encouraged calmly. “You told me you wanted to know the side of me I didn’t like anyone seeing. That you wanted to see.” She squeezed his hand. “Well, I want to know too. I want to see.”
Eris seemed to pause and then his gaze hardened as he straightened. “Iris,” he began and her brows furrowed at the urgency in his tone. “You have to understand whatever I tell you, it has been kept a secret for us to survive. I do not trust anyone as much as I’m allowing myself to trust you. Don’t — don’t make me regret it.” 
She tilted her head and watched him for a quiet minute. “Have I given you a reason not to trust me?”
“No.” he said and swallowed. “But when you’ve been living in a pit of snakes for so long, you’re never sure which one will bite. Things have changed between us but…I have this doubt in the back of my mind that you’ll take anything I say and give it to the highest bidder to get out of this marriage and run.” He paused for a moment and licked his lips. “I wouldn’t blame you.”
She watched him quietly again and it made her chest tighten that even after things had shifted between them, this still worried him. So Iris swallowed and decided to be honest as well.
“And despite the changes between us…I still fear that someday you’ll realize you could beat the living shit out of me every single day and no matter how much I can defend myself, you’ll still overpower me,” she replied. “But I have not seen anything from you that would truly have me succumb to that doubt. Have you seen anything from me to feed into those doubts?”
He paused but Iris didn’t fail to notice how his thumb was back to caressing her hand softly, almost as a way to calm himself down. 
“No.” he said after a moment. “You’re my wife and my friend and my — you’re many things. I — I trust you.” 
“Good. Because I trust you too,” she whispered. “I’ve trusted you not to hurt me and you haven’t.” 
He shook his head and held up her hand in his. “It is my job to protect you. These fists will fight for you.”
Iris couldn’t help the small smile that bloomed on her face or the way her heart swelled at the words. “And I am grateful for that,” she said. “But then who protects you?”
His mouth curled into a tired smile and he sighed. “Apparently, it’s my wife with her healer hands.”
Iris gave him a pointed look and then gestured to his shirt with her chin. “Then let these hands help you.” 
Eris tensed and his grip tightened on his wife’s hands. He wasn’t used to anyone being near him whenever this happened. Wasn’t used to anyone seeing any of his scars, much less fresh ones.
But this was Iris. His wife. His mate. And he wanted her hands to touch him. To fit all of his pain in the palm of her lovely hands and wipe it away.
Could he let go? Let this part of him be free? 
He swallowed again, trying not to choke on his shame. On his fear. He was almost paralyzed by it.
But it was as if she could see it rampaging inside him, could see the struggle in his eyes. For all she had to do was give him a small smile. An encouraging one, her thumb caressing his hand in hers and Eris felt himself straighten. 
He finally allowed a dip of his chin in acceptance and promised himself that after tonight, there would be no going back. 
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evangelical04 · 6 months
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A Single Daffodil || 1
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Summary: Getting arranged to be married to your long-time crush wasn't exactly the fairy tale romance you were hoping for. Nor is the dynamic of the marriage, with your husband treating you like you don't exist. But you're going to make this work, whether he cares about you or not. And he definitely doesn't...right?
Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader
Rating: 18+ minors DNI
Word Count: 2.7K
Genre: angst, romance, unrequited love, smut, enemies to lovers, arranged marriage au, businessman yoongi
Warnings: parental trauma, sibling trauma, toxic parents, unrequited love, explicit language, alcohol usage, yoongi's kind of mean, future smut
Author's Note: hello! i'm Eva and this is my first fic on tumblr ever! I've been a reader for so long and I've always wanted to write my own stories, so I figured I finally would. I know it’s kind of short but I promise the other parts will be longer. Please give me any feedback you have and let me know if you'd like there to be a tag list or anything! I hope you guys like it!! p.s. I'm totally posting this instead of doing my morphology homework that's due in 15 minutes
masterlist / next
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The door to your childhood home looked artificially welcoming. There were too many flowers lining the walls encasing the looming wooden door. The grass on the lawn just was a bit too green without a blade out of place and the paved walkway was freshly powerwashed and missing even a speck of dirt. You let out the deep breath you were holding and gently took hold of the overly ornate bronze knocker adorning the painted wood of the door. Two loud thuds rang out as you knocked and the door quickly opened afterwards.
“Hello, Miss Y/N, your parents have been expecting you.”
“Yes, I know. Thank you, Mrs. Oh,” you responded quietly, nodding at the grey-haired woman. She shot you a sympathetic smile before ushering you in, taking your coat and carefully laying it over her arm. After removing your shoes, you followed her past the foyer to the living room where your parents awaited. 
You knew what was coming, you knew that this had been decided long before you were born. Yet, you still felt unprepared. You had grown comfortable, living in your simple apartment in Gangnam and your quiet work routine. Biting your lip, you reprimanded yourself internally, You should’ve brought this shit up in therapy before it happened.
“Here we are, Miss Y/N,” Mrs. Oh said, snapping you out of your self-pity session. You nodded gratefully at her, sending a small smile her way. Her eyebrows wove together in her own pity-ridden expression and she quickly whispered, “Good luck,” while exiting swiftly. You steeled your nerves and forced your chin up high, knowing that you’d most likely cower inwards as soon as you faced your parents anyway.
Stepping into the room, you noted the almost intervention-like setup your parents had arranged themselves in, with your father sitting proudly in his reclining, leather armchair, clad in a dark blue quarter zip and khaki pants. Your mother stood facing the fireplace, arms crossed, in a simple and elegant turquoise dress and hair tied up in a tight and neat bun, with her baby hairs smoothed back to prevent any imperfection. You could almost imagine her pinched mouth, forever encased in a stern and unamused expression. 
“Hello father, mother,” you started, trying to smooth the slight trembling in your voice. Your mother turned around, eyes narrowing at your form, “Sit down.”
You promptly obeyed.
“Your father and I have decided on your marriage. It’ll be to the Min family, to Min Yoongi.”
“What? To him? But,” you began protesting but your mother quickly cut you off with a steely glare. 
“It has already been decided. Your wedding will be in eight months. I’ll forward you the invitation list and you can add three people of your choosing. You’ll be having dinner with us and the Min family on Friday at six. I’ll have Yujin send you an email with further details. Don’t be late.” 
You looked to your father in a desperate plea but were only met with stony silence and a passive face. You turned back to your mother and registered the composed expression painting her face. Your fate had been decided, and it had not worked in your favor at all. Rising slowly, you set your hands by your side and bowed towards your parents, “I understand. I’ll be there.”
Your mother swiftly exited the room, evidently deciding the conversation was over. You could hear her dangling earrings tinkling against each other in what felt like a mocking melody. Your father calmly produced a cigar from the table next to him and lit up, no longer acknowledging you either. You let out another slow breath and walked out. 
Collecting your coat from Mrs. Oh, who tried to give you a comforting shoulder squeeze but it felt more like condolences than anything, and made your way to your car parked in front of the gate closing off your parents’ home. 
That’s it then.
You felt eerily calm yet stressed as you started up your car and carefully reversed out, making sure to avoid hitting the carved statues your parents had in front of the iron gate. As you drove home, your mind started racing with the information you had been relayed. 
Min Yoongi as your soon-to-be-husband? What irony.
Does he even know you exist?
Will you be able to survive this?
Hand gripping the steering wheel hard, you quickly dialed the most recent number in your contact list. She answered after only two rings.
“Y/N! Are you still alive? How’d it go?”
“Hi Joohee, not great. I’m completely and totally fucked.”
Joohee chuckled on the other end of the line, “Want to come over?”
“Yes,” you breathed, “I was hoping you’d offer.”
“I’ll get the booze.”
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“Min Yoongi? Now that’s ironic,” Joohee chuckled, seemingly at your expense. You shot a glare her way which she shrugged in response to.
“How long have you been crushing on him? This is, like, practically fate. Maybe this’ll be a good thing.”
You scoffed in response, “A good thing? Joohee, be serious. The last thing I want to do is get with my long-time infatuation, not crush, by forcing him to be my husband.” You took another swig of wine. It was a cheap pink Moscato, perfect for nights like these with Joohee. 
Joohee shoved a pillow in your direction in an effort to gain more room on the couch you had stuffed yourselves onto. The trash reality dating show you had on in the background was showing a rather dramatic fight but you paid it no attention, “It’s just…I haven’t talked to him in the last, what, five years? He probably doesn’t even remember me. And you’ve heard the rumors, I don’t think he’ll be exactly thrilled at giving up his playboy lifestyle just because he has to marry me.”
“What if he doesn’t give that up?”
You stared at Joohee in slight surprise, “What do you mean?”
“Like, what if he says that he doesn’t want to stop hooking up with other people? What will you do?”
Your brows furrowed as you considered the question, “I don’t know, I guess. I mean, I can’t really stop him. I guess I’d just have to live with it.”
Joohee hummed in response before continuing on, “Well, this is happening whether you like it or not. Just try to make it amicable at the least. Maybe it’ll work out, you never know. Just look at Jin oppa.”
Kim Seokjin, Joohee’s older brother and a friend of Min Yoongi’s, was arranged by Joohee’s parents to marry Song Yeonhee, and the two had seemingly fallen in love after a rocky start to their nuptials. You had seen them recently at Yeonhee’s baby shower and she had been glowing, looking unbelievably happy. You recalled the loving gaze that Seokjin had sent her during the party and the pang of envy you felt, knowing that you would likely never get to experience that. 
“Yeah, well,” you responded, “He’s an outlier. Most of these types of marriages don’t work out. I have a feeling I’m going to be a part of that group.”
“You’re too negative, you haven’t even met him for dinner yet. Maybe he’ll surprise you. You just have to give him the chance.”
You mulled over Joohee’s words and nodded, “Yeah, maybe you’re right. I guess I’ll see how Friday goes.”
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You weren’t technically late. 
While you still had about 5 minutes before the dinner officially started, you weren’t early, and that was unacceptable by your mother’s standards. A mini emergency at your job had left you scrambling to leave on time, only noticing the late hour when one of your coworkers asked if they should order take-out for the team. After profusely apologizing to your team, they encouraged you to go, practically shooing you out the door, claiming they could handle the situation for now. 
Which left you barely on time to park in the lot outside the ridiculously fancy Japanese restaurant your mother’s assistant, Yujin, had sent to your email earlier that week. You quickly stepped out, smoothing out your dress that you had kept in the backseat of your car and had hastily changed into in the parking lot of your office. Tugging down the hem, you took a moment to look at your reflection in your car window and attempt to look more presentable. Your hair was slightly frizzy but nicely combed back, and you had extremely minimal makeup on from only remembering last minute this morning, and your eyes looked tired. 
You felt tired.
Shaking off your nerves, you headed inside the restaurant giving your family name to the hostess who took you back to a private room where your mother and father were waiting. Your father spared you only a cursory glance before returning his gaze to his phone and your mother looked you up and down before uttering a curt, “Hm.” You held in an eye roll and quickly sat next to them, trying to calm your heart rate for the sure-to-be exhilarating dinner ahead. At six on the dot, you spotted the same hostess leading the Min family towards your table. Your mother stood, welcoming them and urging them to sit down. You stood as well, a little less welcoming, a lot more obligated. 
Mrs. Min looked like the epitome of a rich older woman with dark black hair combed back and glittering jewels lining her ears and neck, complementing the midnight blue gown she had on. Mr. Min was dressed quite similarly to your father, in a simple suit, the only difference being his starkly greying hair providing quite the contrast to his dark blazer. Close behind them was the person you were the most anxious about meeting, Min Yoongi. His pitch-black hair complemented his slightly tanned skin nicely and his feline eyes remained straightforward and untelling. He was dressed in a simple black suit as well with an expensive-looking watch adoring his wrist. His mouth was closed tightly and he did not smile at your mother when she greeted him, not at your father when they sat down across from your family, and certainly not at you.
Your hands nervously played with each other in your lap as you took your seat again. You listened quietly as the mothers exchanged pleasantries and the fathers gruffly greeted each other. You were trying to avoid looking at Yoongi as much as possible.
“So, Y/N,” Mrs. Min started, making you startle to attention, “How old are you now?”
“Twenty-nine, ma’am.”
“Ah, so only a bit younger than Yoongi. That’s good then. How is your work?”
You felt your father stiffen next to you and prayed your discomfort didn’t show on your face, “Good. I’m in the middle of producing a new project with my team.”
“How lovely. Although I’m sure you’ll be leaving that soon after the wedding. You won’t need to work then after all,” Mrs. Min smiled at you. It was hard to read her so you couldn’t tell if she was being genuine or not, though if you had to guess, it was likely the latter. Your job was a point of contention with your family. Choosing to work in a video game production company did not go over well, and if your older brother, Kyungsoo, hadn’t been in line to inherit Seo Industries, you would’ve never been able to keep it. 
You smiled awkwardly in response to Mrs. Min and returned your gaze to the empty plate in front of you. 
As the conversation dragged on, you couldn’t help but steal a glance or two at Yoongi, who was periodically checking his phone and looking permanently bored of the conversation. Not that you could blame him. The dull talk of social circle gossip and work was beginning to get grating, and even the introduction of fancy entrees wasn’t enough to stop your stomach from feeling queasy. 
Yoongi had yet to say one word to you. To be fair, you hadn’t said anything to him either, but he had barely looked in your direction since he entered the private dining room. How exactly were you supposed to start a conversation with that? 
Soon after the desserts came out and were finished, with you politely refusing, feeling like you were going to throw up any second, Mrs. Min suddenly pushed her chair back and stood. She looked down at you and Yoongi and announced, “Well. I think we can leave them to talk on their own for a bit. Why don’t you join us for a drink at our home, Eujin-ssi?”
At the sound of her name, your mother stood, nodding, “Yes, that sounds lovely. Let’s let them get to know each other a bit more.” With that, the parents swiftly gathered their belongings and left, before you could even protest, leaving you staring open-mouthed at the exit. 
Slowly, you turned to face Yoongi and were startled, seeing his eyes already boring into yours. 
“Let’s get one thing straight,” Yoongi stated, his deep and stable voice wrapping around you for the first time that night, “This marriage means nothing to me. It shouldn’t to you either. I’ll do my thing and you do yours. Most importantly, stay out of my life except when necessary. Just because my parents are forcing my hand doesn’t mean I have to adhere to every little thing. Nothing will be changing except for our living situation and a ring on our fingers.”
A little stunned, you could only stutter a passive agreement and watch as he rose and left without sparing you another glance. 
Letting out a deep breath, you closed your eyes, trying to understand what had just transpired. Your heart raced as you quickly stacked up the dishes to be a bit easier for the busboy and quickly made your way to your car. Sitting down in the driver’s seat, you vaguely registered Min Yoongi’s cold demeanor towards you.
It seems he didn’t remember you after all.
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The dress you had on was itchy, but you knew if you complained, you would only end up with a sharp stinging on your cheek and tear-filled eyes. You had escaped the boring party with grown-ups and were sitting outside on a stone bench in the garden, trying to remedy your hurt feelings at the hands of the mean, older boy, Hyunsoo. 
He had confidently poked fun at your appearance, saying the dress was a bit too small on you and that your parents should’ve sprung for a size that could fit an elephant instead. He continued on, saying your parents must’ve forgotten to vaccinate you for measles considering all the red spots on your face that were actually acne. Being a tender twelve years of age and going through the worst bits of puberty, his words hit you hard and you quickly ran from the scene into the garden. 
Unable to contain your tears, they slipped down your face in large droplets and soaked into the front of your dress. 
“Hey, you.”
Startled, you looked up to see a boy a couple of years older than you standing in front of you, black hair shining in the light from the garden lamps. His sharp eyes trailed down your tear-stained face. You quickly turned away in shame, not wanting to undergo any more embarrassment tonight. 
“Hey, snot-face.”
You shot him a glare but softened when you saw his hand extended, holding a handkerchief, his face turned slightly away, “Use this. You look ugly while you’re crying.”
You gingerly took the cloth from his hands and blew your nose, noticing him wince out of the corner of your eye. 
“Thank you,” you managed and he only rolled his eyes in response. 
“Yeah, whatever. I think Joohee’s looking for you,” he grumbled before turning on his heel and stalking off back towards the party. 
Confused, your eyes followed after him, not knowing how he knew that Joohee would be looking for you. You unfolded the handkerchief and noticed an elegant embroidering of three letters in black near the bottom, MYG. 
Oh, you realized, Min Yoongi. Joohee’s older brother was friends with him but you had never seen him before. Joohee had described him as kind of rude and quite closed off, but you disagreed. He certainly didn’t seem that bad.
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malcriada · 19 days
Text
TIME SENSITIVE, PLEASE HELP BILAL
We want to extend our deepest gratitude and thanks to all the people who came out in support of Bilal‘s campaign and shared and donated. 
I‘m really happy to announce that not only have some of the funds raised benefitted his family in Gaza, but it has also helped Bilal find a new place to stay, away from his terrible ex-employer and landlord, and has enabled him to extend his residency for another month. He  is no longer at risk of deportation right now. It’s only thanks to your incredible support that all this was possible.
But despite all these good news, we need your help again. 
There is currently no option to transfer funds from Germany to Gaza, as bank transfers to Gaza are being blocked by the German government. This means Bilal has to first transfer the funds to a bank in another country, and then from there to Gaza. The funds currently take a very long time to reach his family, and require Bilal to pay a high fee for the transfer as well. 
On top of that, his ex-employer and landlord had extorted a large sum (€4800) from Bilal – a sum he claimed he still owed him from the time he was employed under him. With no other source of income at the time, Bilal saw no choice but to pay it using some of the money from the campaign. 
Bilal feels extremely conflicted to be asking for help so soon again after reaching his last goal. But he unfortunately sees no other option due to the aforementioned problems. 
We need your help in fighting the repression from the German government and also making sure that the funds you helped Bilal raise also reach his family in full. 
This is why we need to raise €8,850 by the 15th of September i.e within the next 2 weeks. he currently has raised €101,150 of €110,000
This amount will help make up for the funds that were extorted from him by his landlord and help him pay the fees for multiple international bank transfers.
Please help Bilal reach his goal in time. You have gotten him this far, please don't let him down now. his campaign has been verified and can be found on @/el-shab-hussein’s and @/nabulsi’s list of vetted fundraisers here (#132, line 136) so PLEASE don't hesitate to share and donate.
[ID: a gfm link with a picture of two small children sitting in the sand in front of a cooking pot. they are looking up a the camera, eyes half-closed. the title reads "Donate to Help Evacuate My Family from Gaza to Safety, organized by Bilal salah" End ID] tagging for reach under the cut, please let me know if you'd like to be removed:
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