#ill bring a strawberry cake just let me hang out with them

[orionwhispers]

Bravado // Tommy Shelby Imagine

(A/N - its been a long ass time and i wanted to ease myself back into writing but this ended up being long and also super super angsty. sorry that this illness imagine came during covid idk whats going on with my imagination lol. love you guys SO much thank you for always being there. reblogs, comments and likes mean everything to me.)

trigger warnings - LOTS of angst. fluff. implied smut. my hc that tommy has a fear of illness, bad descriptions of hospitals. 

He knew something wasn’t right the minute his car pulled into the driveway and you weren’t waiting for him under the great concrete arch, with that smile on your face that made his knees buckle and heart race like he was a love struck teenager.

You were always there as soon as he came home. Barefoot in a broderie dress in the summer with tousled hair and baby pink toenails. Wrapped in a hand knit blanket with fire flushed cheeks and woollen socks in the winter - even running across the gravel and into his arms in the middle of a storm, the ice cold rain whipping across both of your faces as you kissed under the light of the moon.

No matter how shit his day or week or month was, no matter what stained his hands or darkened his heart, no matter what lay heavy and hard deep in his gut, seeing you made everything vanish in the night air like wisps of smoke. You made everything worth it.

He refused to give into fear, he wasn’t that kind of man, so he swallowed all of the nagging thoughts and apprehensions as he came up to the dark foggy windows and the iron cast door. It felt strange turning his key in the lock without the weight of you in his arms or the sticky peach kisses you left down his jaw and neck, the smell of the vanilla in your hair and lavender on your skin.

The second thing that sent a jolt of white hot electricity down his spine was Mary, watching him anxiously and wringing her hands in the hallway. Usually, she was calm and collected, taking his jacket and leather travel bag with her signature placid smile and gentle fingers. Usually she would return to the kitchen and finish up whatever she was making - a hearty roast lamb with rosemary and garlic and glazed potatoes or a pheasant pie with honeyed carrots, always followed by a three layer chocolate ganache cake that was so thick and rich you practically had to saw through the sponge. She would always have dinner piping hot and dripping with gravy by the time the two of you returned downstairs, no matter how many hours it took for you to get... reacquainted.

Now she looked sheepish and pale, her skin almost translucent under the syrupy yellow lights. There was something about the way she stood, as still as a wraith, that made his blood run cold.

“Mary. Where is she?”

“Mr Shelby, I - ” Her voice was strained and hesitant, like a slowly fraying rope.

“Where is my wife?”

She moved forward, creases forming around her eyes. “We tried ringing you in Liverpool but the hotel said that you had already left, so we...”

“You rang me? Why? What’s happened?” He couldn’t hold back the desperation in his voice, and it lingered and festered around them both like a poisonous gas.

“Mrs Shelby came down with something a few days ago, we thought that it was just a common cold but unfortunately she seems to be getting worse.”

He tore upstairs before he could even think, his shoes leaving perfect muddy footprints on the cream carpet. He almost slipped at the top, and he lurched forward, his hands reaching out and holding onto the portrait hanging above the stairs for stability.

It was the oil of the two of you. A soft, personal picture that revealed more than he ever possibly could. The love in your gazes, the hint of a soft, drunk smile on the dangerous gangsters face as you leaned into him, melting into him like butter, him holding onto you as though he couldn’t bear to let you go. It was his favourite photo, one that always washed a sense of calmness over him, a reminder of the woman that he loved and the way he felt around you. But now he felt as if was riding out a terrible storm.

He lived his life with no fear, he was capable and practical and used to the sound of bullets and the copper sweet smell of blood. There was really only one thing, one terrible thing that he couldn’t control, and that was what drove him crazy.

Sickness.

It gnawed at his insides like a rabid dog, clawed under his skin and settled behind his ribs. Losing someone he loved was like ripping out a piece of his heart straight from his chest, and he knew better than anyone what it was like to lose somebody to a violent, quick death - the pull of a trigger or the smack of a fist. At least in those moments he could lock them away in his mind, he could leap in front of a bullet or crack the neck of any man who dared to get too close to you, but there was almost nothing he could do to stop sickness, and the devastation it caused.

When you first met him it had been a surprise, almost amusing, that this powerful God of a man had these small little quirks. His house was always sparkling clean and smelling of Lysol, his fruit bowls were filled with citrus fruits and round, plump blueberries. He always made sure you were wrapped up warm in the winter, always placing his coat around your shoulders and bringing an extra pair of gloves in case you forgot yours. It was adorable, the way he took care of you,

It wasn’t till a little bit later when you learnt of those he had lost. His mother and his childhood sweetheart taken away from him much too soon. It broke your heart when he told you late one night of the sallow tint of their skin and the way he could almost see them vanishing from earth, the way that illness had moulded and changed those he loved the most.

You understood.

Your best friends older sister had died of tuberculosis when you were young. The elderly woman across the street from your first flat had passed away from a bout of horrendous smallpox. Your brother lost his first child to pneumonia. Times were changing but the fear of disease was ever present. Medicine was improving and so was knowledge, but still there remained a huge, dark cloud of what could happen, one that always hung around your husbands head.

——————————————-

All Tommy could think was the worst as he ran through the landing. His heart was in his ears and his bones felt loose, like the sweet liquorice the two of you would share at the pictures. He came to a stop by the bedroom door, tentatively pressing his palm onto the wood and ever so slightly pushing it open, listening to the gentle creak it made.

The room was warm. The lace curtains were pulled shut, and your favourite lavender candles were flickering on your vanity, casting syrupy shadows against the wall. He exhaled loudly as he saw you, bundled up under a mountain of satin sheets and hand crocheted blankets, your hair splayed across the pillows.

He moved to your bedside, pretending not to notice the large, untouched jug of water and the tissue box next to you, hoping and silently praying that you weren’t sick - just asleep and waiting for him, ready to wrap your arms around his neck.

You were silent, your lips parting every so often as you breathed, your chest rising and falling. He reached out gently, as though he was picking up shards of glass, and brushed his fingers against your cheek. Your forehead was beading with sweat, your cheeks flushed, and yet your skin was ice cold to the touch. He recoiled quickly, his heart dropping like a weight into his gut, and he inhaled a shaky, deep breath.

He saw something curled up beside your hands, a fluffy white cloud with sparkling emerald green eyes trained on him. Despite everything, he smiled. He thought of your birthday - of strawberry cheesecake and champagne, and surprising you with a ribbon wrapped little kitten as you woke up. He thought of that day often. How you smiled and leapt onto him with tears in your eyes, his whole world blissfully quiet as he spent the day in bed with you and your new best friend.

He would have preferred a big dog, one with sharp teeth and a menacing gaze to ward of visitors whilst he was away. But you were drawn to the tiny, malnourished runt of the litter who was scared of his own shadow. A kitten no bigger than the size of his clenched fist. A little white hairball who only ate and drank from fine pink saucers. A cat that had a very frustrating habit of crawling in the bedroom right as Tommy’s hand was up your skirt and his lips on the sweet spot of your neck, the tiny thing mewling and crying until you picked him up and nuzzled him into your chest.

He was a horse lover through and through, and never saw himself having time for any other pets. But in the summer when you saw the litter from one of John’s barn cats and fell in love with the sweet baby who mewled and cried and crawled right into your lap - he knew that he would give you anything and everything you wanted.

Including a cat who refused to accept that Tommy was the man of the house.

“Hello, boy.” He said, leaning over to scratch Comet under the chin, using a voice he only reserved for the two of you. “Have you been looking after my girl whilst I’ve been gone?”The cat meowed loudly in reply, pressing his head into Tommy’s palm but not moving from his spot beside you.

Tommy suddenly felt you shift under him and his heart lurched into his throat. He turned to face you, cupping the side of your clammy face as your eyelids fluttered open, blinking under the candlelight. A rush of red hot heat built up in his belly as you registered him, that angelic smile growing on your face, your tired eyes glimmering with recognition of the man you loved.

“Tommy?”

“Hi, Princess.”

You smiled sadly. “You’ve been gone for weeks - I missed you.”

He felt his brows crease as he rubbed along your jawline softly, trying to stop you from falling back asleep. He felt panic in his throat as sour as vomit, and he tried to bite back the nagging feeling that something was very wrong.

“No, sweetheart, I’m early. It’s only Thursday. I left on Monday.”

“Oh.” You said softly, your voice as gentle as the breeze rustling through the trees outside. “Well let me welcome you back properly - let me make you a lemon drizzle or a...” You lifted your head from the pillow and shuffled under your blanket, but he pressed his hands against your shoulder and held you down.

“No. You’re staying right here.”

“But - ”

“No.”

“Hmm. Don’t leave me, Tommy.”

“Never.” He said, his tone firm and cast like stone. He stroked your hair softly as your breathing slowed, but it didn’t nothing to quell the hard thump of his heart in his chest.

——————————-

Tommy left the room as quietly as he could after you had fallen asleep in his arms. He hadn’t wanted to move, not when you were pressed against his chest, looking ethereal but vacant, sweat beading under your brow and your face lacking colour. He wanted to stay with you, curled up by his side, his fingers laced through yours, the sound of your heart thumping in his ears.

But he was a man of action, and seeing you there - your lips cracked and dry, shudders passing through your body and goosebumps raised over your skin - he couldn’t fight the fiery urge to do everything in his power to make you feel alright again.

He found Mary waiting outside the door, chewing on the skin of her lips and swaying on the balls of her feet in anticipation. He grabbed her by the arm, harder than he meant to and something he would apologise for later, and pulled her downstairs, determined to let you rest whilst he got some answers. As soon as they reached the drawing room he spun her around, clenching his jaw and pointing a finger at the anxious maid.

“Where the fuck is the doctor? Why isn’t he here?”

“Mr Shelby.” She said, stepping forward calmly. “We phoned Doctor Moore and he came on Tuesday to see her.”

“Tuesday?” He seethed. “My wife has been ill since Tuesday and no one called me?”

Mary raised her hands in defeat, making it clear that the decision wasn’t hers to make. “He said it was nothing of concern . He gave her some antibiotics and told her to rest. She asked us herself not to call you, she knows how you.. worry.”

He ignored her sugar coated attempt to quell his anger, but if anything it made his vision darken. “When it’s my wife, It is always my concern.”

“Mr Shelby, we were just doing what we were told. As soon as we noticed she wasn’t getting better we phoned the surgery again, but Doctor Thomas was out for the day and said he didn’t think it was necessary to come round again, so we -”

“I don’t give a fuck. My wife is the number one priority. Ring every doctor in England if you have to, get somebody out here now to see my wife.”

He stormed away, anger pulsating through his veins, but he stopped suddenly, and threw out over his shoulder:

“And call Doctor Moore’s ’office. Tell him to expect a visit from the blinders soon.”

———————————————————

Once, when you were first dating, you found Tommy at the door to your flat at midnight, with scraped knuckles and blood dripping from his nose. You let him in, cleaned him up and sat with him in the bath until his skin was clear and his breathing was even. He knew that night, as you were pressed against his chest and his lips were pressed to your scalp that he was truly, madly and completely in love with you.

He remembered waking up the next morning, love drunk and blissful, and finding the bed beside him empty. He found you in the kitchen, wincing slightly and pressing a hot water bottle to your belly as you buttered a few pieces of toast. He rushed to your side with eyes as wide as saucers, concern lacing the features that were usually ice cold and hard as stone. You were completely baffled as he held you at arms length, his bright cerulean eyes trailing up and down your body for any signs of injury he might have missed. You were bewildered at the sight of the powerful man practically on his knees as he made sure you were alright, and you bit back a giggle as his warm palms spread over your abdomen.

“What is it? Whats wrong?”

“Tommy. Sweetheart.” You said softly, bringing his gaze level to yours. “It’s just - you know - that time of the month.”

He brushed off your embarrassment and ran his fingers through your hair, pressing a uncharacteristically gentle kiss to your forehead, sending a swarm of butterflies around the pain in your stomach.

“Do you need anything?” He asked, half ready to run down to the corner shop and buy any amount of painkillers or chocolate bars or your favourite lavender tea that you might need; not caring who saw the seemingly terrifying gang leader in the street with an armful of strawberry laces and salt water fudges.

You smiled like the summer sun and he melted, pulling you close as you whispered in the shell of his ear that you only needed him, and that was all you ever needed.

That was the first time you fully saw the extent of Tommy’s fear, but it definitely wasn’t the last. He knew he wanted you forever and always, and it took only six months of neck kisses and pillow talk, red hot jealousy and possessive hands across your skin and dancing in the rain and falling asleep under the pale yellow moon for him to put a ring on your finger. You were both consumed by your love, as though it was the only thing that mattered, it was insatiable and powerful - the wonderful mix of the devil and his sweet little angel.

And with that, came the good and the bad.

Like when you got food poisoning after Arthur cooked you a Sunday lunch to cheer you up whilst Tommy was gone. He came home to you retching over the toilet bowl with Mary holding back your hair, and swore that he would kill his brother with his own hands. Or when you slipped on ice and broke your arm while out with friends in London, and Tommy went ballistic and tried to ban you from ever leaving the house. It was just in his nature, how he always made sure you walked on the side furthest from the road, kept an arm slung around you whenever you were together, kept his eyes alert and vigilant no matter where you were - always looking out for his girl.

But he had never been like this.

———————————————————-

You were falling in and out of sleep. Waking up drowsy and heavy headed, squinting under bright lights, an ache in your skull and a burning in your throat. Every so often you felt a pinch in your upper arm, a squeeze on your palm, a kiss on your forehead - but you always drifted back into unconsciousness.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed when you woke up. The room was dark and you could hear the wind howling and whipping rain across the windows. You felt all too hot and all too cold at the same time, and the bed was damp with sweat. You struggled and tried to sit up, your head swaying and feeling as heavy as one of Tommy’s marble statues; as if you had been carved up and moulded. You could hear voices out in the hall, and unsteadily got to your feet, moving towards the noises.

“Pneumonia?” You heard through the thick wooden door, instantly recognising your husbands voice. “That’s impossible.”

“Sir...”

“Fucking. Impossible.” You knew his teeth were clenched.

The other man cleared his throat.“I know that it’s hard to hear, Mr Shelby, but your wife is very sick.”

“Just...” You felt your heart flutter and clench in your chest as the sound of his broken words, could practically feel his desperation and you wanted nothing more than to hold him. “Just tell me how to make her better.”

The second man spoke again, his voice softening and lowering, something you knew Tommy would hate. “Mr Shelby, the first round of antibiotics didn’t work and that means that it’s time for something stronger. Usually I would suggest the Birmingham hospital but I don’t think it’s equipped for...” He paused, trying to think over his words carefully. He wanted to convey the severity of the situation but also didn’t want to risk getting a bullet in his head from your very protective husband. “...This kind of reaction. I recommend we send her down to London for extra testing.”

“London? That’ll take two fucking hours. How the fuck can you recommend letting my wife travel that far? Are you out of your fucking mind?”

“I’m my opinion this is the wisest choice to make, but unfortunately that could mean your wife might get worse before she gets better.”

“Worse than she already is? That’s not an option.”

The man you assumed was the doctor was insistent, trying his best to portray the severity of the situation but failing as your hardheaded husband had already come to a decision.

“I’ll look after her here. She’s safest with me.”

Once Tommy had spoken that was the final result, and the doctor slinked away into the darkness and shook his head. You remained peering from behind the door, your tongue between your teeth and your heart hammering.

Tommy took one look at you and frowned, scooping you in his arms like a baby despite your protests. He ignored you, acting playfully and cheerful but you could feel his heated skin and the see flare of his nostrils. You wanted to help him but didn’t know how, and let him tuck you under the covers once again. He kissed your crown and stroked your hair and you wanted to speak but no words would leave your mouth.

“You stay there this time. You know I have no problem with tying you to the bed.”

You rolled your eyes as he left, and his clenched fists and tightened shoulders told you all you needed to know.

————————————————-

Comet watched from his spot beside you as Tommy wrestled with the fire. He had noticed you shivering despite your high temperature, and bundled you up in blankets whilst sparking matches beside the fireplace. There were raindrops across his shoulders, evidence that he had been outside and to the log store right at the end of the property - a job that had always been for the Groundskeeper. Your precious cat nudged the tips of your fingers as you sighed and watched your husband throw kindling onto the coal, a deep unease settling over your gut.

“Tommy, my love, I’m fine.” It wasn’t exactly true but you felt he needed to hear it. But you could practically see your words wash over him and evaporate like ocean spray.

He was shaking a metal tin in his palm as he worked, and you groaned and let your head hit the pillow as he pulled out two round chalky tablets. You winced as he placed them beside your glass, your mouth already tasting like the sour talc medicine you had come to loathe. He raised his eyebrows and shot you a look that told you he wasn’t far off plugging your nose with his fingers to force you to swallow, and you childishly stuck up two fingers as you took them.

Your stomach rumbled with nausea and you bit back the bile in your throat as you settled into the pillows. You watched your husband as he pulled off his crisp white shirt, revealing his taut tan stomach and the deep ink tattoos that you loved to trace with your fingertips and your lips. There was something about him standing there, with those damn cerulean eyes and hidden muscles, that boyish hair and slender fingers that you wanted desperately around your throat, that made a million tiny fireworks spark inside of you.

But instead you pushed him away from you despite your body wanting nothing but him wrapped all around you. “Don’t get too close. I might have something contagious. I can’t have you getting sick.”

He ignored you, smiling inwardly at the way you always put others before yourself. It was one of the million reasons he had fallen for you. You were sweating out a high fever and shivering in pain, and yet you always thought of him first. He pressed his lips to your temple and pulled you closer, knowing that skin to skin was a way to bring down a fever - even if it meant he had to restrain himself from tugging off your pretty little white nightgown and whatever frilly things you had on underneath.

“I’m not going anywhere. Fuck it if I catch anything.”

“That’s easy for you to say. I’m the one who will have to dote on you hand and foot, you big baby.” You teased, pressing yourself into him playfully, finally giving in.

He held you like a child, trying to hard to soften despite the way you felt underneath him. Everything on him was running a mile a minute, and he couldn’t help but want to try everything and everything to make you feel better. His hand was pressed against your temple to always try and measure your fever, his other palm across your chest to try and count your heart rate.

He could hear Mary treading across the landing carpet but he ignored his anxious maid, instead letting himself be completely consumed by the only thing that mattered - you.

This was something he had to do by himself. He was the only one who could care for you he reminded himself. And he let the words tumble over and over in his skull until they were all he could hear.

—————————————————————-

You had been asleep for a long time.

Every hour, after pacing the length of the hall and sanitising his hands and wiping the beads of sweat above your brow and above your breasts he woke you up and held a cool glass to your lips. You mumbled and moaned and pushed him away but he kept his fingers across your wrist - harsher than he ever had before - and kept you as close to him as possible.

He couldn’t remember the last time he had cooked. Perhaps it was last valentines when the two of you had camped out under the stars, drinking icy white wine and sharing stolen, day drunk kisses. That night he had roasted a chicken over the fire and it had burnt to a crisp as the two of you rolled around the grass, his head buried in your neck as you giggled at the poultry going up in flames.

He was trying now though, easy, plain substantial meals that wouldn’t upset your stomach. Boiled egg and dippy soldiers. Crackers with smooth cheese. Bubbly water and ginger biscuits. Each time he went upstairs you pushed him away, your whole body shuddering and almost retching, and he felt like smashing the plates against the wall at his defeat.

It had been almost thirty six hours since he had come home and it had been almost as long since you had eaten something, and his heart thundered and shattered in his chest when he found you gasping and wheezing over the toilet bowl when you had taken a bite of toast to calm him. He rarely left you alone, only for a few minutes to put the still full dishes in the sink, to ring Lizzie and tell her that he wouldn’t be coming for reasons that he refused to disclose, to smoke a cigarette under the grey stone archway, his shaking hands and bitten fingernails barely visible through the sleepy rolling fog.

He had grabbed handfuls of papers and the brass ink pen you had got him for your anniversary and broke his own rule - bringing work into your bedroom. It had always been a sacred space. For candlelight and soft laughter, aching hands and heart shaped bruises, a sanctuary for him to breathe and to love and to be loved fully in return. But he was afraid if he didn’t have a distraction, he might just completely lose it, and he had to be there for you.

So he sat squinting in his glasses, the room almost completely dark save for a few candles because of the migraines that had started to spread throughout your skull, and let himself be drawn into the mess of squiggly lines and numbers that suddenly didn’t add up, with you still centre stage in his peripheral.

After about forty minutes of rereading the same sentence a dozen times to try and make some sense of it, he heard your voice, like a small crack spreading across a sheet of ice, coming from the bed.

“Tom?” You sounded so weak, he practically flipped your cream vanity as he got to his feet and darted towards you. “I don’t feel well.”

He lifted you as you reached your arms up at him like a child. He almost gasped at the sweat pouring from your body but didn’t want to scare you, and instead held your shaking, shivering body against his own. How could you be so hot, yet so cold at the same time? Your skin was prickled with goosebumps yet you were burning with a fever, and for the first time in a long time, he had no fucking idea what to do.

He left you propped up against the headboard and he entered the bathroom. He ran over to the claw foot tub you loved, twisting the faucet and trying to find the perfect medium between boiling hot and freezing cold. He didn’t want to overwhelm you, just try and soothe your raging fever, and he ignored the shelves of expensive bath oils and scented soaps that you coveted, instead opting for a handful of something meant to ease tension - praying to whoever was listening that it would help you somehow.

There was a brutal, awful moment as he lifted you from the bed, limp as a rag doll, where he imagined what would happen if your heart were to stop. He couldn’t comprehend what it would be like to miss the weight of you in his arms, the smell of your skin, the feeling of your lips against him, the shovels stopping and fading into nothing. It hit him square in the chest, as merciless as a bullet, and he had to lean against the doorframe to stop the two of you from plummeting to the ground.

He undressed himself first. Tugging his white shirt off, sliding off his slacks and his underwear, keeping you as close to his chest as he could. Then he pulled your nightgown up and over your head. He gathered your hair and secured it up with a claw clip so that it was away from your face, the heat radiating off your neck as fierce as the fire now burnt down to ash in the bedroom.

He lowered the two of you into the bath, sinking down beneath the eucalyptus smelling lukewarm water, letting it wash over you both. Your teeth were chattering and you were barely awake. He gathered handfuls of water, letting it drip over your shoulders and pulse points, grabbing a washcloth and running it over your raised skin, hating how you barely registered his touch. As he scrubbed over your collarbones and up to your face he saw your lips had turned to an awful, silvery blue, as vibrant as a fresh bruise. He hissed and tugged on the plug, now determined to get you wrapped up in a fresh towel and tucked back into bed.

You were soft and placid and he helped you out, lacking the usual fire that he adored. Your eyes were glassy and missing their vibrance, like the vanishing spark of a lighter - and he felt miles and miles of invisible distance between the two of you. You were unsteady on your feet and he used his body to prop you up as he warmed your arms with a fluffy white towel. You suddenly stopped, lifting your hand to your mouth as you started to cough - a horrible, dry, gasping cough.

He noticed it almost immediately. His eyes darting to the splatter of red against the white, a smudge of crimson that was as loud and commanding as a siren, a warning signal that something was definitely not right. A bead of scarlet that would linger long behind his closed eyelids.

He managed to get you back into bed, remaining calm as he stroked your hair and kissed your temple. He tucked you under the duvet and waited for your breathing to even before he ran downstairs, his heart thumping in his ears as he practically ripped the phone off of the wall.

“Pol? Fuck. I think - I think I need help.”

—————————————————————-

The room smelt like bleach and metal. Unfamiliar and clinical. There was something hard on your chest and covering your mouth, it tasted like wet pennies and was as heavy as a hand over your throat, but for the first time in days you could finally breathe. You tried to sit up, but there was a needle in your chest, a gown you didn’t recognise cut straight down the middle to accommodate it. You struggled and lifted the thin bedsheet above your shivering torso, trying to look around the cold room.

“Careful!”

It was Polly, dressed immaculately despite her surroundings. She reached out and placed a manicured hand across yours, and you smiled at the woman who had always been a calming influence when you had joined the circus of a family. There was concern in her eyes, rimmed with black eyeliner and lifted lashes but still swimming deep around her pupils. That made you frown, and you moved as much as you could to face her.

“What happened?”

She ran her tongue over her teeth, choosing her words. “You gave us quite a fright, love.”

“I did?” Your memories of the past few days were much like a fever dream, blurry and distorted snapshots were all you could really remember.

“Your pneumonia got worse. A lot worse.” She paused, looking over to the door and you followed her gaze. “They found fluid in your lungs.”

“So...” You started, gesturing to the needle in your abdomen and the breathing apparatus around your head.

She nodded. “Yes. You were in surgery. It was touch and go for a little bit.”

“Really?” You were bewildered. You couldn’t remember anything, let alone having major surgery. You looked her straight in the eye, asking her the questions that had been on the tip of your tongue since you had woken up. “Where is he? Where’s Tommy?”

“He’s outside.” She clicked her tongue, reaching deep into her purse and pulling out some hand cream, gently rubbing your dry hands like she was your mother. You leant into her touch despite all of your questions.

“What? Why?”

“I think he blames himself. God knows what goes on in that mans head. All I really know is he was bloody terrified.” She paused, looking over in the distance. “I’ve never seen him so scared, not even on his wedding day.” She smiled sadly, trying to lighten the mood, but it soon faded. “He didn’t leave your side the whole time you were asleep.”

Your heart thumped in your chest, a soft aching that you knew all too well. “I want to see him.”

“I know you do. But right now...” She stopped right as a handful of nurses entered, clad in long blue dresses with white aprons, hair tied back and smelling of strong soap and disinfectant. You lost Polly in the bustle as one spoke softly to you before tugging on the needle right beside your ribs, your eyes just catching hers as she left, a promise to see you soon on her lips.

It wasn’t her you saw next, but Tommy.

The nurses had cleaned you up with wet flannels and bowls of warm soapy water. Your hair had been braided and your face washed, and walked you arm in arm over to the bathroom so you could relieve yourself. A skittish doctor followed after, his eyes darting across you and his touch gentle as he changed your dressings and took your blood - obviously under strict instructions from your husband, and despite everything, you smiled.

You were sat listening to the clock tick. A romance novel you had been given was dangling dangerously close to the end of the bed, but you were too tired to focus on it. You heard the door squeal softly, and the sound of familiar footsteps across the tiling, each small thud sending shockwaves across your spine.

“Tommy.”

He looked tired. Exhausted rather, as though he had been awake all the hours that you had been asleep. His eyes were bloodshot and his skin was sallow and bruised. His clean shaven face was dark with stubble and his hair was ruffled and unwashed. You longed to reach out to him and cradle him against you, but he stood in the doorway, lingering like a ghost.

“Tommy?” You repeated, your voice almost a whisper, breaking his already shattered heart once again.

“How are you feeling, my love?”

You smiled softly, like spun sugar and sweet honey. No hospital bed or itchy gown could dull your infectious light. “Better now.”

He approached you almost cautiously. He settled down on the hard chair beside your bed and stroked a line down from your temple to your lips, his touch setting you alight like an electrical storm. There was a sadness in his eyes that reminded you of how he got when things were bad, and you willed him to come back to you. His touch was tentative and he inhaled shakily as you cupped his hand with yours, pressing a tender kiss to the inside of his palm.

“Don’t scare me like that. Ever.” He was stern, as though hoping his words would make it true. “I mean it.” He kept his gaze on your pretty face, trying his best not to stare at the harsh bruising on your delicate flesh or the sickly tone of your skin.

“Tommy I’m going to get sick, even you can’t stop that.” You teased gently.

“I can bloody well try.” His hands cradled your face, pulling you into him and kissing you fiercely, still mindful of the wires and tubes taped to your body. There was something about the tenderness and deep longing in the kiss that when mixed with your total exhaustion and love for your husband prompted tears to start falling from your eyes. You sniffled as he pulled away, concern dripping from his beautiful features, his powerful mind wanting to do everything and anything to stop your hurting.

“Hey, hey.” He said, running his calloused fingertips under your eyes and wiping your tears away. You leant into his touch and he kissed your temple, squeezing you even tighter into him. “You know I hate it when you cry.” He toyed with your hair and winked playfully. “Besides, all you need to focus on is getting better. You’re going to have to take care of me when we get home, this week has given me a fucking stroke.”

You rolled your eyes, kissing the inside of his wrist. “You’re a idiot, Thomas Shelby.” You blinked at the clock looming above you both, wanting to stay in your blissful bubble but also knowing that Aunt Pol would probably be in the vicinity harassing a poor nurse over your results. “You should go and find Polly, let her know that everything’s alright.”

He shook his head and nuzzled his nose across yours, an act so innocent that your heart dipped and swooped in your chest. “Later.” He said, breathless and consumed by you. Everything had been too much. Almost losing you had been harrowing, it had punctured him completely and he just needed to feel his girl safe and warm around him. He needed to know that you weren’t found anywhere.

“I just want to stay here for a while. Just me and you.”

You grinned. “Always.”

[mimiplaysgames]

Terraqua Week Day 6 (Free Day)

Summary: Terra and Aqua are getting married—and Ven is the Bridezilla. || Word Count: 9,058

Read on AO3

A/N: @terraquaweek​ I could have never written this without my dear friend @localcryptideli​. We talked about this wedding years ago, and I promised to write it. It’s here, three years later, blending their headcanons with mine and I couldn’t be more proud of it. <3

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

the threads that tie hearts together

Terra never once considered in his entire life that his wedding preparations would include the perk of mice squeaking in his ear—but he here is, in the tailor’s studio, getting re-fitted for his tuxedo, with Princess Cinderella’s team of seamstress mice on his shoulders, measuring the length of his arms. His muscles were too big for the previous suit. 

Ven refuses to hire a proper tailor, and instead rents out the parlor so the mice could do their work in private.

Lea sits on a nearby bench by the shoe shelves, the top button of his shirt open, jabbing at his Gummiphone. He’s quite popular today, pinged every two minutes. Isa and Roxas share a mirror, trying to get the mechanics of their bow ties right. 

Terra is getting married. 

The thought. Married. Soon. Yes. Damn. He can’t cry right now.

Terra stands in front of a mirror and bends his elbows to see how the fabric moves. The mice are tiny, three of them in skirts. They’ve developed an efficient obstacle course of threads all down his entire body, a network so the mice on the floor can deliver them supplies—spools, sewing needles, thumbtacks, measuring tape—in a jiffy. 

Lea groans, squeezing his Gummiphone. “This twerp is going to turn me into a serial killer.” He yawns, possibly for the fortieth time.

“Not an ill-fitting job, all things considered,” Isa says from across the room.

“I do appreciate your sarcasm.”

“Who’s bothering you?” Terra asks, lifting his collar so the mouse on his left could thread through it with a sewing needle.

Lea snorts, slaps his knee and leans forward. “Did you not know your buddy is a monster?”

“Ven?”

“Oh, he’s a joy.” Lea holds his Gummiphone up as if he’s about to make a speech. “Come help me pick out Aqua’s flowers. Now. If you could.” He glances at Terra, then back at the phone. “He writes that in all-caps.”

“I’m sure he doesn’t mean to be so pushy.”

“The other day, he called me to model the bride’s dress because Miss Aqua couldn’t be bothered to come to the fitting herself.”

“Master Aqua was away on a mission,” Isa explains.

“Isa took photos of me in it—” Lea scrolls through his phone, but stops. “Oh, I can’t show you before...” He clicks his tongue. “It’s very nice. Very bridal.”

Terra is sure that’s true, but the image of Ven hanging his head so much on someone else’s wedding is worrisome. Last night, he fell asleep at dinner. “I think Ven is taking on too much stress.”

“Lea,” Roxas says, snorting a chuckle and giving up on his bow tie, “you should show him the texts.” 

“Gladly.” Lea stands to shove the Gummiphone into Terra’s face. Out of the history, a couple of messages stand out.

Ventus

I got 500 cake flavors come taste them with me

Ventus

Which cologne do you think terra should wear

COME SMELL 

i need a second opinion

Ventus

Do you have aqua’s flowers yet?

remember 

we want orange roses and bluestars

Ventus

Aqua isnt here im freaking out

Youre closest to her body type

HELP

After all that, Terra feels as though he’s being watched by several microscopic eyes. One of the mice squeaks with urgency, and he straightens one of his arms. “I don’t know what to say... Why doesn’t he talk to me directly?”

Lea purses his lips as though this is a secret not worth sharing. Roxas is the one to step forward, a knowing grimace plastered on his face.

“He told me that he doesn’t want to bother you with anything.”

That doesn’t sound entirely false but not true either.

“That’s ridiculous.” Terra tests the bend of the elbow to fiddle with his bow tie. It’s already done but something about it doesn’t sit right. “He could come to me for anything,” he says with a low voice, wondering if there’s something he’s missing. Terra has also been a mess. He’s getting married. Holy stars. 

Isa huffs out of frustration, turning away from the mirror, his bow tie undone. He studies Terra’s suit. “I don’t like it.”

His straightforwardness is well appreciated. Aqua would probably smirk at the sight of it and stare at his neck the entire ceremony. “I don’t either,” Terra says.

“Smart man.” Isa smirks, and tugs Terra’s bow tie to undo it. “Let’s change it.”

Lea snorts. “You might want to ask permission from he-who-shall-be-slapped.”

“It’s my wedding,” Terra says.

“So you think.”

He-who-may-be-slapped enters the tailor’s parlor through the front entrance, announced by the bell of the ring. He’s perfectly dressed in his ringbearer’s/best man’s/maid of honor’s suit, vest fitted, bow tie sublime, sleeves coiffed. He sees what Isa is doing. He gapes.

“Hey guys,” Ven asks with a frustratingly shaky voice. “What are we doing?”

“They are unbecoming,” Isa answers, wrapping a traditional tie around Terra’s neck.

“Oh.” 

Sometimes, speaking to Isa is like getting clocked in the stomach. By the looks of Lea’s expression, chewing on the edge of his Gummiphone, it’s well deserved.

“Okay,” Ven says, with a tight smile. He takes the tie from Isa’s hands. “Do they match?”

“A hello would be less rude,” Terra says. “Hi, Ven. Can we talk?”

Ven glances up. “Later. There’s lots to do.”

Lea inhales sharply. “Hey, Ven. Here’s an idea. Did you know you could tame cicadas to sing in harmony on command?”

Ven whips his head around. “You can?”

Isa brings a hand up to hide a smirk and Lea passes him a subtle wink.

“Picture it.” Lea opens his arms. “From nine until eleven at night, they gather in the bushes. They mutter, a light dusting of atmosphere on a peaceful summer night.”

Ven’s eyes grow wide with obsession. 

Roxas comes near. “You can also make them glow.”

“Like stars in the bushes,” Ven whispers to himself.

“Come on, guys,” Terra says, unimpressed. “Leave him alone. We’ve got better things to do.”

Ven snaps himself out of it, but not before pulling out a notepad and writing notes. He eyes Terra over, nudging him to open his arms and pinching the sides of the suit. Ven draws them in by the measure of a finger and pulls pins out of his pocket, like he’s been expecting to use them, and marks their places. “Jaq Jaq,” he calls, “where’s Suzy? We need to make sure these ties look right. Oh, and we need two extras—we have to ship some to Riku and Sora.”

Some mouse squeaks in reply.

“I can help her carry things.” Ven gives a flash of a smile and then hurries off.

Out of earshot, Lea gives Terra a look. “Anyone able to talk to mice is a crazy person in my book.”

Terra glares back and quotes, “‘You could tame cicadas to sing on command?’”

“He needs something to obsess over. How else am I going to get peace?”

“This is going to bite you in the ass,” Roxas says, wrapping his new tie over the neck and having a much easier time.

“Ventus may very well task you with hunting and gathering the cicadas,” Isa says, a tie already in place, immaculate. 

Lea groans and Terra feels it’s well deserved. 

Well deserved… the suit may be. The future wife, maybe not. The suit is a glove for every finger with no excess. It makes him a good-looking groom, a nice addition to the closet for any special occasion. The bride is beautiful, no matter what she wears. She is loyal, patient, strong, intelligent, loving, funny when she’s stern, too good for him, a divine gift he didn’t earn and he still can’t understand how she said yes.

“I hope you’re laughing at the face of my misery,” Lea says.

Terra knows that’s sarcasm. Weddings are headaches, emotions are terrifying and Terra needs Aqua like a sip of medicinal tea to calm down.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The others squeal when they walk into Le Grand Bistro. It’s sunset, the city lights already ignited and giving it the glow of evening fairies welcoming the moon. They’ve just discussed dresses—Xion requests a pantsuit instead, which looks stellar—and they can choose their own styles so long as they all wear the color of night. Simple, elegant. That’s the kind of effect Aqua prefers. Thank goodness they’re almost done. Aqua couldn’t handle more hands in her hair and she rejected the flower crown that would have come down on one side to compensate for the lack of length. 

She fiddles with the ring—a thin, intricate design weaved around a small, blue stone—as a waiter escorts them to the kitchen. On days when she doesn’t have missions, she wears it.

Aqua is getting married. Some part of her wonders about the surreality of it, like it’s a dream or a picture she created in her mind when she was a child, at the altar with a faceless person next to her. Sometimes, it feels like she is already married. Terra has always been with her. Every day in class. Every day strolling through the woods. Every day sparring, sharing meals, bickering and laughing. Her best friend, her confidant, her rock.

There is something about nearly dying that challenges perspective. When they both thought they’d never see each other again, it made them realize there’s more to it and there’s been more to it for years. The emotional intimacy that strengthened after the fact. The physicality of it, when he takes her to bed. They argue differently, they laugh the same. Terra has always been with her, so what is the difference between being with him and being married to him? A part of her is eager to find out. The other is already at peace, a kind of joy Aqua has always wanted.

Ven is in the kitchen, talking with Remy (responding to Remy, who is naturally unintelligible). Plates of cake pieces sprawl out on the table, eliciting oohs and aahs from the others, all patient like they’re waiting for Aqua’s permission to take a small bite.

Aqua reads through the description of flavors—strawberry, fudge, angel food cake with blueberries, red velvet, even coffee. “The one we requested isn’t here.”

“You mean…” Ven pulls out his notepad and looks through his notes. Remy climbs onto Ven’s head, squeaking and pointing to a bowl of flour and eggs, unmixed. “Dark chocolate and rum?”

“That would be correct.”

“A spicy cake? Are you insane?” At his shock and at Aqua’s denial, Kairi helps herself to a spoonful of vanilla. “This is a wedding, not a club!”

“My wedding, Ven.” Aqua isn’t annoyed, but amused. Ven has such strong opinions about for some reason. 

“Try this one.” He holds up a plate of a decorated piece that honestly looks delicious. “Triple chocolate, with the rarest berries found in the woods, matured at thirty-five degrees Celsius for a week.” 

“Burnt cake?” Kairi asks with a smirk.

“Not the cake, the berries.” 

“Oh,” Xion gasps, with need in her eyes. It takes a nod from Aqua to grab a fork and have at it. She approaches each piece with so much excitement— Aqua wonders if there are flavors here she’s never tried before in her short life. 

“What will the final cake look like?” Naminé asks, the only one not to dive forward. She’s so gentle, so serene. When they were trying out dresses, everyone was saying what a beautiful bride she’ll be one day if she chooses. 

“Perfect,” Ven says, like it’s the most obvious thing. “It has to be perfect so it will look beautiful. Painted like a night sky, with stars everywhere. You got that, Remy?”

Remy glares at Ven.

“I want,” Aqua starts, and when Ven frowns, she smirks. Sometimes, for the sake of maintaining control, she has to play dirty. “Rosewater and cardamom.” 

Ven sticks his tongue out in disgust.

“Terra needs something to enjoy,” Aqua insists. “These are all too sweet for him.”

“Terra is the bane of my existence.”

“By the way, I don’t know if I want King Mickey and Queen Minnie to officiate.”

“You are way more difficult to deal with.”

Aqua and Ven have a staring contest as the others talk about their favorite flavors. Ven, a glare, a challenge to outwit her. Aqua, a calm knowing that she’s going to win. Ven relents.

“Fine,” he stresses. “Remy, change of plans. We’ll need some damage control. Let’s add some”—he writes into his notepad—“fruit pastries, sweet cheese with chocolate—”

“Triple chocolate,” Kairi adds.

“Custard and kiwi,” Xion says.

“All good choices.” Ven writes them down.

“Sea salt ice cream?” Naminé says, lifting a shoulder. “Everyone else eats them, I hope to try some.”

“Ven.” Kairi slams a hand on the table. “You need to add marshmallows covered in hazelnut and chocolate.”

“We need all the chocolate,” Ven agrees. “Call it revenge on this nasty cake.”

Kairi cackles, but it’s nothing malicious. They’re young and excited about the wedding, their suggestions a way of helping. Aqua takes it all in stride. The small details don’t matter, only the intent, and letting friends have fun deciding makes the entire process easier. What’s bothering her is Ven. He’s exhausted from taking it all too seriously. Aqua assumes the best intentions, but she doesn’t get it.

“You know what would be really cute?” Xion says. “Little petit fours shaped in your symbols.”

Ven blinks. “What symbols?”

“Oh, the Keyblade Master symbols.” Naminé claps her hands. “That would be so lovely.”

“In different colors,” Xion says.

“Each a different flavor,” Naminé adds. “Maybe the same colors as your Wayfinders?”

“You two are geniuses.” Ven taps his notepad. “Remy, we gotta get to work.”

Remy stomps a paw and squeaks vigorously.

“No worries. You’ll get paid.” Though it seems that’s the last thing on Remy’s mind.

“Ven,” Aqua says softly, pulling him aside as the others brainstorm ideas. “I don’t think we can afford all this.”

“Sure you can,” he says too confidently, though she and Terra were the ones to save up their munny. “Don’t worry,” he stresses when she’s not convinced, giving her a squeeze on the arm. “You asked me to bookkeep your finances” 

“Reminder that I did not ask you to take full responsibility. Remy can’t do all of this alone, he’s going to need you.”

“I’ve got plenty of time, and we’ve got plenty of budget.”

Aqua does not know how that is possible. After the dresses, the refitting of Terra’s tux, the decorations… sure, since they’re using the ballroom in the Land of Departure, they saved on not having to rent out a venue, but the original plan was to have a small, intimate wedding in the woods, something private with just the three of them, minimal decorations necessary, all plucked from nature. 

All of this is out of their price range.

Ven goes back to the table, back to the stovetop and oven where he follows Remy’s instructions and mixes the flour in the bowl with some milk. He doesn’t assuage her at all, like he knows something she doesn’t.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Home should be a solace but not when it’s the wedding rehearsal. 

Ven has ushered in movers from different worlds to carry in artifacts, all decorations, all star-themed. Terra has yet to see the ballroom, but the amount of people rushing through the hallways makes him nervous. 

Ever since Terra called Riku in the dead of night (in a panic, needing someone to talk to, alone in the kitchen with a cracked mug of tea), blabbing about tripping on the way to the altar, or cutting the cake clean through the table, or stepping on linen and ripping the curtains, or dropping his plate of food, or looking like an idiot on the dance floor, or worse—forgetting his vows—he hasn’t lived a moment of peace. Sora won’t let him. 

Terra finds it hard to breathe. What if he chokes on his vows and accidentally offends everyone?

He stays far away from the workers—it’s for the best. No one needs a huge bull stampeding in a china shop, destroying everything.

Lea crosses the hallway on his sixth trip and enters one of two entrances to the ballroom, vases of flowers in his hands. Terra peeks. From the looks of it, Ven did a fantastic job. 

The ballroom, once gold, now looks like the set of night. The ceiling is covered in blue with twinkling lights. The table linens are also dark, with napkins and silverware sets a solid gold. Glass windows that take up one entire side to the ballroom are bare of curtains—the wedding is planned for after sunset so they’d be declaring their vows under the stars. Two navy blue carpets come in through both entrances of the ballroom, meeting in the middle and then straight to the altar at the far end. The point is for him and Aqua to enter together, like equals. With her in a bridal dress, she’ll look like a light in the darkness.

Through the doorway, Terra can see Riku and Sora, the latter making motions with his arms as if he’s flapping like a bird. Terra lets the door close so they don’t notice him. 

There are fears he’s never voiced.

What if she realizes she doesn’t want to get married to him after all? At the altar no less?

Oh stars, what if he makes a terrible husband? 

What if he neglects her?

What if, years down the road, she realizes after a slowly oncoming epiphany that she isn’t happy and regrets it?

Tonight is the party, tomorrow is the wedding, and Terra still has no vows. He pinches his nose hard enough to distract him from crying. He’s already cried five times in the arc of three hours.

Footsteps—light, brisque, confident, hers—approach him, and Terra embraces her in his arms, taking her in with a needy kiss. She smells like home, she lets him breathe again. 

“You look like you’re about to fall apart,” she says, stroking a thumb on his cheek.

“Not if you’re my glue.”

She snorts, smacking him on the bicep. “What did I say about the puns?”

“Shower you with them.”

He kisses her before she can roll her eyes—

—and gets interrupted the moment Ven peeks out of one door. 

“What’s with the hold-up?” he says.

Terra breaks from the kiss, casually noticing how Aqua is patting his shoulder, as if to warn him. “What’s with your attitude?”

Ven pouts like he’s about to choke and slaps the notepad to his forehead. “No one listens to me. I said baby blue and champagne on the napkins, all shaped to form the constellation of Juno… and they gave me yellow. I am gonna complain so much.”

“There are worse things?” Terra says and Aqua shakes his shoulder as another warning. 

Ven snaps his eyes open. “Get into position, we’re starting.”

Aqua stands behind one door and Terra goes to the other, waiting for the cue to enter. On the other side, Ven is speaking out loud, organizing people and where they should stand. Grooms and bridesmaids will enter the altar from behind and gather together, leaving the carpet only for the star couple (no pun intended). He interrupts himself, raising his voice about vases that match too much and Terra can imagine him pointing across the room.

“I have to tell you something,” Aqua loudly whispers from the other side of the hall. 

Terra runs to her and wraps an arm around her waist. Touching her is a panacea. Despite knowing there is still a possibility she’ll rethink this entire relationship, it seems unreal, like a nightmare.

“It’s about Ven,” she continues, keeping her voice low even though they’re the only ones in the hall.

“Lea threatened to slap him.”

She frowns.

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

“Don’t you think it’s too expensive?”

“I don’t know. Ven doesn’t tell me how much anything costs.”

“It’s way more than we have saved up.”

Terra gapes. “Then how—?”

Aqua stammers, fiddling with her fingers. “I looked into his books.”

Terra melts into a breath-heavy laugh, careful to keep his voice out of it. “Reading people’s diaries? Aqua, I thought I knew you better.”

She blushes. “I didn’t mean to, but I was worried.” Now Terra is worried. Her expression is too serious. “Ven has been doing side-missions and hustles for months just to earn enough to hire the best chefs and tailors, to buy linens and all these flowers and carpets—” 

“He wouldn’t.”

“He did.”

“Why?” 

“I think it’s because he wants us to be happy.”

“We are.” Terra doesn’t appreciate how he doesn’t sound confident, scared he’s assuming too much on her behalf. “How could he just…”

“We were stuck in darkness for so long and he couldn’t help us.”

“But that’s not his fault.”

“He feels he is the weakest and wants to compensate.” Aqua grimaces and she blinks back tears. 

“I feel so guilty.”

“I feel worse.”

“Why?”

Aqua bites her lip. “I’m still attached to the idea of a small, intimate ceremony in the woods. Just the three of us. Does that make me a horrible person?”

“No. Our wedding has become a spectacle. Maybe pointing that out makes me terrible, too.”

She groans. “I found a book. I left it in your room. It’s very last minute, but there are some ancient rituals in there that I found so beautiful… the exchanging of rings is beautiful, too, but modern and there are some lost traditions from our Keyblade history that I’d love to do instead... if you could take a look?” 

The way she smiles, stars. Ancient, modern, he’d do anything for her. “Sure. I’ll read it tonight.”

Aqua winces. “He’ll be so angry with us.”

Terra squeezes her hand. “He wants us to be happy. Think about that.”

One of the doors burst open, and Lea sticks his head out. “Kindly stop being an ass and don’t keep your guests waiting anymore?”

They start: Terra at one entrance, Aqua on the other, entering the ballroom at the same time, where guests will watch them approach one another, like the shadow of the moon to a star. They meet at the point where their lanes merge into one. 

Terra offers his arm—

“Nonono,” Ven warns, running up to them. “You can’t meet her like this. You must bow at a forty-degree angle.” Ven scans the room frantically. “Here, I have a ruler.”

After that hiccup, Aqua finally takes Terra’s arm, walking down the single aisle, where guests can ogle at them. Their groomsmen and bridesmaids take pictures with their Gummiphones for their arrival at a wall of flowers. 

Sora has his hands behind his head and snickers when they reach the end. “I made sure the carpet is ironed out so she doesn’t fall with you.”

“I’m going to kick you in the shins,” Terra says.

He snorts and wipes his nose. “I’ll kick you back.”

At the altar, Ven is too excited to stop rambling. “We have to make sure that you arrive here, at this spot, at exactly nine-thirty so we can finish the vows at ten because...” He frames the windows with his hands. “We’ve got a perfect spot for star sighting so we need to be on time.”

“Do you mean, right after the wedding ceremony?” Aqua asks. 

“Before the reception, yup. We’re walking out to the balcony, we’ll watch the meteor shower where a new world will be born, then we’ll come back in for supper and dancing.” When he notices their stupefied faces, he continues, “I spent three weeks finding the right angulations so you can witness a unique astronomical event, and we’ve got a miracle of a spot right here so we can’t be late.”

“It’s a wonderful thought, Ven,” Aqua says, her voice shaky.

“Okay, now you get into position and face each other.” He points and they follow. “Next, Mickey and Minnie will talk some stuff, you know, all official, and then you say your vows.”

Terra freezes up. “Our vows.”

“Yeah. That’s what I said. You ready?”

Terra hesitates and Aqua speaks for him. “We’re keeping those a secret until tomorrow.”

Ven pauses, then shrugs. “Fair enough.”

Aqua doesn’t let Terra have another thought, leaning forward to kiss him in front of everyone (aahs and awws elicited), and ending the rehearsal.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“How do you get your skin so clear?” Kairi asks, though the warm glow of the fire makes for spectacular lighting. 

They’re camping in the woods near the waterfall, equipped with warm blankets and pillows, a bowl of cookies, and toasted marshmallows on sticks; Aqua’s vision of a bachelorette party. No gifts necessary.

“Mountain spring water does wonders for you,” Aqua says.

“I’ve read in a magazine,” Xion says, crawling out of her sleeping bag, “that some people like to put mud on their faces to get clean skin.”

“Why?” Naminé asks, chewing on a marshmallow.

“Something about the properties. Lots of good minerals.” She walks over to the creek, digging her hands into the dirt and smashing it into her face against the shocks and cries of the other girls. “If mountain water is good for you, then that must mean this mud is magical.” 

“Is that true?” Kairi says, though she’s asking no one. She hurries over and joins in on the mud-mashing, running fingers over Xion’s face in places she’s missed.

With globs of mud in their hands, they bring over the excess to the camp. 

Xion offers it to Aqua. “For beautiful skin on your special day?”

“It’s our job to pamper,” Kairi says with her hands out so that Naminé can scoop up the mud on her own. 

Aqua tries not to chuckle too loudly. It’s adorable. “Okay,” she says, and Xion gets to work, massaging it into her skin. It smells unpleasant, earthy and mukky. She closes her eyes and tries to relax regardless.

“I think we’re supposed to keep it on our faces for at least a half hour,” Xion says, rubbing more on Aqua’s nose. 

“This will make us prettier?” Naminé asks.

“Cleaner,” Kairi says. 

Naminé blinks, already covered in the mud and hesitating to put on more. “But we look dirty,” she says quietly.

“Can I request something, Miss Aqua?” Xion says, patting her fingers onto Aqua’s forehead.

“Certainly.”

“Can you tell us the story of how Terra proposed?”

Kairi jumps and squeals, and Naminé claps her hands, both of them chattering please, please, we’re dying to know.

“We’re around a fire,” Kairi says, as if that’s a convincing argument. “We’re supposed to tell stories.” 

“I feel bad for asking,” Naminé says. “You’re very private, and I don’t want to intrude…”

Aqua reads her face. “But you’re curious.”

Naminé pouts. Xion’s eyes go wide, and Kairi nods excitedly. Everyone is guilty as charged.

“It’s a simple story, I guess,” Aqua says, crossing her legs and watching the fire. It’s not often that she talks so openly about the details of her relationship. The two of them together is something people know, but never knowing where they come from and why, except for Ven—even then, there’s so much he never pries to. Watching their reactions is a little overwhelming. She rubs the stone on her ring. “Terra made the engagement ring with his own hands, but he took months to propose.”

“I remember that,” Xion says, sitting on her chair and smiling. “It annoyed Lea so much that he offered to set you both up just to get it over with.”

Aqua laughs. “I’m grateful we had it to ourselves.”

“Was it romantic?” Kairi asks.

“Not at all. I… knew he was up to something. I know him.” She lifts a shoulder. “He was burning breakfast too often, he couldn’t look me directly in the eye, and he left on his own to do more missions than usual. I took that as though he had done something wrong. The last time he was that clumsy and avoidant, it was because he accidentally cast Firaga in the library and was trying to hide it. Or when he broke the oven. Or when he offered to do my laundry but didn’t know how to treat my fabric and ruined my clothes.”

“He sounds like a clumsy oaf,” Kairi says.

That makes Aqua smile. She loves that oaf. “He is. The general rule of thumb is that a clumsy, avoidant Terra is usually hiding something.”

“So how did the proposal happen?” Naminé asks.

“I cornered him—”

Kairi snorts.

“—and he blurted it out.”

They giggle, Kairi acting out how that may have looked and Naminé holding her hands over her heart in a show of genuine affection. 

Aqua smiles to herself, a finger to her lips. It might be her favorite memory, her standing her ground and demanding to know what was going on. 

Terra, looking all around the terrace except for her face, guilty, guilty, guilty, pulling a box out of his pocket and stammering for a cohesive sentence. Well, I don’t know what to say, he had said, like a child getting grounded. I-I’m sorry. I’m dumb, I’m a big lump of a human being. He paused, his cheeks rounding up like he was about to vomit. Will…will you marry me, anyway?

It felt like racing in a train and pulling all the stops, crashing. He got red in the face, tears welling in his eyes and she realized he took her silence as rejection. Aqua had to hold his forearms, and all she could utter was a soft, I genuinely thought you burned down a building.

Terra’s eyes went wide. Do you mean you’re not mad?

Of course not. Why would I be?

So… He licked his lips, reaching for her but not touching her, forgetting that he had the box with the ring inside. What do you say? I mean, you don’t have to give me an answer straight away. I mean, I just thought you would… you know… because… He sighed. Yeah.

Aqua finally laughed, and kissed him on the cheek. Of course I will marry you, you beautiful dork.

The laughter quiets around the fire. They’re waiting for Aqua to continue her story.

“Then he drops the ring.”

They howl, melting into a blissful exchange of cheers and gossip, a vibrant hearth brighter than the one keeping them warm. 

“I had hoped to propose first, actually,” Aqua continues. She shrugs. “The end.”

“That was beautiful,” Naminé says, wiping her eyes.

“If Sora hears about this, he’ll never leave Terra alone,” Kairi says, grinning something mischievous. 

“I don’t know what love is supposed to look like,” Xion says thoughtfully, gazing at the sky. “But it sounds sweet.”

In Aqua’s opinion, the proposal was perfect, him scattered on the ground frantically searching for the ring, her on her knees helping him. How he slipped it on her finger, how they kissed for an hour in the dirt, unaware that they were dusty, unaware that anyone else existed in the world. 

Aqua nods, mostly to herself. It aches to be away from Terra tonight but it burns her insides to see him tomorrow and finally do this. Aqua wants to sleep and get this night over with but she doesn’t want to sleep so she could see the sunrise, knowing he’d be up early watching the same thing.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Bachelor parties aren’t fun.

Sora is whooping about a cannonball, the water splashing when he makes contact. Ven and Roxas race to the lake, testing who will be the first to dive, the first to swim across and come back. Considering the expanse of the surface area, they’ll be gone for a while and the barbecue will get cold, but maybe it’s for the best. It’s not the right time to talk to Ven right now, not when all of them have a moment of fun (except for Terra, the only one here thinking about tomorrow). Lea and Isa prefer to relax, sipping drinks on their chairs by the lanterns erected onto the sand, speaking quietly about memories, about chores, about home and what ifs. 

Terra sits by himself, the thin booklet Aqua gave him on his lap, tucked under layers of parchment. It’s titled The Way, no author. She was right: old Keyblade rituals are interesting, almost possessive, their focus on the literal binding of hearts. They’re from the Age of Fairytales, and Terra realizes as he reads through it that ancient Keyblade wielders were for some reason obsessed with the loss of memory and the prevention of it. The rituals sound painful, too—maybe Aqua has developed a mild taste of macabre from her time in the Realm of Darkness. 

All Terra has left to do are his vows. His stupid, dorky-sounding vows. He should have accepted the simple, “I do.” He shouldn’t have waited until the last minute.

He’s tried dramatic.

You are my other half, my heart, my breath of life, my sky, my angel, can we keep our souls together? 

He’s tried poetic.

The mountain will thirst if not for the water— 

He’s tried being honest.

I don’t know why you love me, but I’ll do my best to make it up to you.

All dumb.

Terra groans into his hands, eyes wide in existential blunder. 

“Keep doing that,” Riku says, setting a chair next to him and sitting down, “and you won’t be able to blink again.”

“I’m not finished.”

“But if you don’t sleep, then you’re more likely to have accidents.”

Terra gapes and almost whacks Riku on the side of the head from the sight of his constricted smirk. “You’re so mean. I called you one time.”

“In a huge panic talking about causing mass destruction of a wedding the worlds have never seen.” Riku shrugs nonchalantly. That’s his state of being—too cool for anything, too sensitive for everything. It’s refreshing. “It was the funniest phone conversation I’ve ever had.”

“I’ll never call you again.”

“Not in the middle of the night, please no.” Riku bites a forkful of steak. “Is it cliché to tell you to speak from the heart?”

“This entire conversation is cliché, but here I am, living it out.” Terra stares at his messy pages, where he pressed the pen so hard that it left ink blots.

“You could do the very committal thing and tell her you love her fifty times.”

“All the guests would leave by the time I reach twenty-five.”

“More like fifteen.”

“Ten.”

“Disaster.”

Terra grimaces, not entirely comforted, but not entirely anxious anymore, either. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”

“It is a big deal, I’ll give you that,” Riku says, more serious. “I don’t have any advice.”

“None of it makes sense. Be honest, but not too honest. Be loving, but don’t make it cheesy. Express yourself, but hold back on certain things. Do make it personal. Don’t expose personal details. How am I supposed to know how to do it right?” 

It would be easier if there are no witnesses. If it’s just Ven, if Aqua is the only person he’s talking to, if he could simply say, You’ve been my best friend for as long as I can remember. I know I’ve fucked up. For as long as I live, I’ll never do that again. I will never take your forgiveness for granted.

And if she doesn’t want to be with him anymore, there’d be nothing he could say to make her stay.

“I think if Aqua was the kind of person who expected you to do it right,” Riku says, looking out to the lake where Ven and Roxas are swimming back to their shore, “you wouldn’t be marrying her.”

Terra bends the pages, exposing the cover of the thin, leather bound booklet. There are no vows he could use in there, except for the officiator declaring their hearts intertwined. “Thank you,” he mumbles.

“Sorry I can’t be of more help.” 

Riku pats him on the shoulder and leaves him alone to take a walk, Sora begging him to enter the water. Terra flips to a page where he’s repeated I love you, I love you all over, each in different calligraphy, like doodling, like losing his mind and procrastinating the night away, hoping that any moment, inspiration would drop bricks on him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It’s time.

The strangest part of the day is waiting it out in her bedroom until it’s her turn to show herself. Over the years, her bedroom has been a reflection of her personality. The cleanliness, the artifacts from her home world long ago, the size of the bed, the furniture—they all stayed the same. What’s come and gone were the paint colors, the bedsheets, the art on the wall, the smaller vanity mirror. Her bedroom is her old life, and she sits in front of the mirror in her bride’s dress, about to start a new one. For now, they both collide, as though her childhood doesn’t know her.

The cape dress is simple, plain white with the neck scooped across the collarbone. The sleeves slit at the shoulders, draping over to the floor with the rest of the train. Aqua couldn’t have asked for something better. She completes the look with the ring, a jeweled hair pin on one side, and an armored choker. Makeup is minimal. 

Aqua is surprisingly calm and the sun is going down. 

Her Gummiphone buzzes with a text message.

Terra

Let’s do it

Aqua sighs, not texting back immediately.

Aqua

I don’t want to break Ven’s heart

Terra

I’ll talk to him

We can both get what we want

I already stole some flowers from the wall

Don’t think he notices

She chuckles, moving a hair strand behind her ear. She hasn’t noticed that her stomach has been a knot, from excitement, from nerves, from anticipation. The sun takes so long to set. Terra is the warmth of a tight blanket.

Aqua

Will this label me as a runaway bride?

Terra takes a long time to answer, giving her the impression that he must have been distracted and forgot to reply. 

It buzzes.

Terra

The shame

Aqua

What will they think when they find out the groom seduced her to it

Terra

The scandal 

when they hear how she met him secretly at the creek 

an hour before the ceremony

It sounds like an action plan. Aqua picks up her bouquet of orange roses and bluestars from her vanity table, heading out the door.

Aqua

I want Ven there

Terra

Definitely

I love you

Aqua

I love you too

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Terra finds Ven in the dining room, taking inventory of an indulgement of sweets and a feast of meats, fritters, and rice. The wedding cake is as tall as his body, a dark blue with smacks of gold glitter in the shapes of galaxies, large stars framing each layer, and topped with two halos. Ven is mostly dressed in his vest and tie, the suit missing. By comparison, Terra is overdressed, a groom ready for his encore.

Ven sighs when he sneaks a cookie the shape of the Keyblade Master symbol into his mouth, as though Terra’s presence reminds him of disappointment. 

“I couldn’t tame the cicadas,” he says morosely, like he’s apologizing, and for a moment Terra second-guesses what he’s about to do. Ven eyes the white rope curled around Terra’s shoulder. “What’s that for?”

“This may either cheer you up or piss you off,” Terra says, dropping The Way on the counter.

“I don’t like how you said that.” As Ven flips through pages, he frowns, chewing on the side of his lip. “Are you... not happy with the wedding preparations?”

Terra inhales, caught off guard. “Of course I am. Happy, I mean. It’s… huge. It’s a giant ordeal.”

“And you don’t like that,” Ven says quietly, stroking one of the pages with his thumb.

“I think there are things we’ve always wanted to have privately.” Terra sits on a stool, but Ven won’t look him in the eye. “And we want you to be there. We can do it now. We’ll be back in time for our guests.”

The booklet shakes in his hands. “I messed up.”

“From my point of view, I’ll be eating very well tonight. There’s nothing to compensate for.”

Ven closes the book. “I just wanted to do a good job.”

“If you allow Lea to slap you, he’ll forgive you.” Terra smiles, but Ven doesn’t join him. “We’re still doing your grand ceremony—that, we could never pull off on our own. But we also want something tiny and ours, and we won’t do this without you.” Terra takes Ven’s hand and squeezes it, before glancing at the cake. “I hope it’s delicious.”

“It’s disgusting so you’ll definitely like it.”

“See, I can always count on you.” Terra stands up. “Now come on. You wouldn’t want us to be late for the bride.”

Terra takes him to the creek, not far from where Aqua hosted her bachelorette camp, where the sound of rushing water is gentle and the creek splits into two directions, one that would drip off the side of a cliff and one that would join a massive river downstream. The trees huddle close in the clearing, a soft shadow from the fierceness of the setting sun, like a pocket of protective magic in the middle of the forest. 

Ven gasps. “You stole my flowers.”

“Please, you didn’t even notice.” Terra had built an easy wooden arbor before the crack of dawn that morning, an arch weaved with orange and blue flowers, spotted every so often with green lilies. He showered right after so no one would suspect.

“Let’s take it over there.” Ven points to a short boulder against a tree nearby, a good photo op. They pluck the arbor up from both sides and plant it in front of the boulder. Ven takes stock of the sight. “Not bad.”

“Thanks!”

“I take credit for the choice of flowers.” Ven rolls the rope into a tight circle, layering it on the boulder with each loop in equal circumference. He splays the book open and studies. “It’s kinda creepy,” he says though he gets no response and he doesn’t ask for one.

Terra shoves his hands into the pockets of his tuxedo and waits. Aqua isn’t here yet. The vest constricts his breathing, the thicket suddenly feels humid, and Terra wipes his cheek, realizing that his heart is beating fast. Time sped up to this moment and dropped him here without warning. Now it’s slowing down out of pure, unjustifiable spite to torture him in the final hour. 

“You okay, dude?” Ven asks.

Terra lifts his face to the sky to keep the tears in his eyes. “If I cry now, I think I’ll cry for the rest of the night.”

Ven snorts. “No one would be surprised, trust me.”

But it’s not working. He’s two seconds from sobbing. “I don’t know. I…” He scoffs. “I can’t believe it’s happening. I’m expecting her to never show up or brush me off last minute when she realizes what we’re doing—”

“No.” Ven approaches Terra like he’s about to punch him in the stomach to make a point. “Don’t think like that, she’d never do that.” 

Ven has good faith and better timing. Aqua approaches the other side of the clearing, the fabric of her dress gracefully making waves with every step, the foliage fluttering light and shadow on her figure. She holds her bouquet in one hand and a framed photograph tucked under the other.

It shocks Terra.

He can’t stop the flow of tears. He covers his shivering lips and the drip of his nose, his face twisting from the sight of her—brilliant, like she’s made of stars, a gift walking the earth.

“Terra, are you okay?” Aqua asks, rushing to him now, the train of her dress bouncing behind her. 

In the flash of an instinct, Terra runs to meet her, tripping over a branch and landing right into her arms. 

“You’re—” Terra sucks air in, his heart shoving itself up his esophagus. “Y-you’re s-so beautiful.”

Aqua uses her pinky to wipe his tears. “So are you.”

“Let me help you.” He takes the frame—a portrait of the Master, bordered with a white ribbon—and walks her to the arbor. Ven takes the portrait and places it on the boulder, their little family tied together, fractured in glued pieces, now and always. Before they start, Terra asks Aqua to pose under the arbor so he can take a picture of the trees and the flowers surrounding her. Beautiful.

“How do we do this?” Terra asks when he finds his voice again, still trembling. Aqua stands to the side to take her place. She’s beautiful.

Ven takes the book in his hands. The description of this ritual covers at most two pages. “Well, it’s archaic. It’s from the Age of Fairytales but it sounds like we will intertwine your hearts—but in an intense way, like we’re sewing them together.”

Aqua holds her bouquet to her chest. “Shall we start?”

Terra chuckles too hard, gasping for breath. “Simple as that.”

They wait for Ven’s cue, who also has no idea how to do anything. Ven clears his throat, shrugs his shoulders, and reads:

“We witness today the soldering of two hearts. To intertwine like the roots of a tree, the severance painful, the nourishment plentiful. A physical bond, a magical one, the merging of two sprites under the guidance of one truth. Two hearts, but one.” Terra watches the way Aqua watches him. There’s no one else in the world, Ven’s voice disconnected, like it floats on air. “Now it says to summon your Keyblades. Dig the tips into the ground, and offer your hilts to each other.”

Ends of the Earth is massive, taller than Ven. Stormfall looks delicate but it’s menacing, sharp, direct. They offer their hilts, the shafts crossed over each other, Stormfall light and airy in his hand, Ends of the Earth weighty and thick in hers. 

Terra finds it interesting that they’re using the hilt to connect each other’s hearts—the Keyblade should never be used against a person’s heart in traditional Mastery, because it’s such a dangerous weapon and it’s so violating. The blunt hilt, on the other hand, the physical manifestation of their hearts, is like exposure, an offer of vulnerability. 

Aqua’s feels like it’s thrumming, singing. She’s happy.

Ven steps forward with the rope and ties it over the hilts in loops. “This is just an image, the ties that bind, two Keyblades, but one. To intertwine a heart is to forge a chain, a friend, a companion, a memory. If missing then a void, a dream, a wish until reunion.” He steps back into position. “Before we go on, I think this would be a nice place to say your vows. Terra, you first.”

Terra stammers, looking into her eyes. “I-I couldn’t write one. I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay,” Ven whispers, pulling a piece of paper out of his pocket. “I wrote some just in case.”

Terra doesn’t take it. He licks his lips. “It wouldn’t have been graceful. None of it—all of my thoughts—pale in comparison to you, Aqua.” He steadies himself with labored breathing, the squeeze on her Keyblade like a hold on her waist. “You’re so, so beautiful, and I’ve spent my days believing I don’t deserve you, because… because I couldn’t make things right like I should have.” 

Aqua quivers, gently touching his arm with her free hand and motioning for him to breathe. 

He continues, “I’m sorry. I wish the Master was here. I wish I was smart enough to prevent it from happening.” He inhales, choking up from the mention of Eraqus. “I never thought you would marry me of all people, so… I promise... I will be there every step of the way. I promise you, if you’re scared at night, I’ll be there to protect you. If you’re hurting in another world, I’ll come find you. If you’re confused, I’ll hold you close and help you make sense of it. I’ll brew you tea to help you sleep, I’ll step in the line of fire even if you wish to do the same for me, I’ll walk to the ends of the earth to make sure you are safe and healthy. I promise I’ll be with you.

“And I’ll mess up. I know me. I’ll fix it. If you want to clobber me, I’ll be patient. I’ll learn. I’ll do better. Every day you save me from myself. This is the least I can do. I’ve loved you since I was a kid. I’ll love you every day.”

Silence falls on all of them, Terra sniffing just to get some fresh air, Ven wiping his eyes, Aqua blinking too much. 

“Now you, Aqua,” Ven says. 

Despite being teared up, Aqua holds it together. She’s so good at that.

“Terra, I stand with you because I do want to be here. I do want to be by your side. I do want to laugh at your bad jokes.” She relieves a giggle. “I love you. I have for as long as I can remember, even if I didn’t know the words for it.” She studies his face. “I’m sure the Master is here with us, and he couldn’t be prouder of you. I’m proud of you.” Suddenly, she switches her tone, as if to lecture. “And if you even fathom taking a hit for me, remember that I’m faster than you. I’ll protect you first.” Then she softens. “I promise to be your shelter when the storm falls on us. I promise to sit on your bedside when you’re sick, to lift you up when you’re down about yourself, because you are sometimes. 

“You are my home, no matter how far your heart is from me. If you need a star to light your way back, I’ll give it to you.” She smiles widely, like she’s about to laugh. “If something between us breaks, I’ll mend it with you. I can’t imagine my life any other way.”

Their words are now spoken. Aqua suppresses a laugh and grins like a child. Terra holds his breath, just in case he screams from every emotion that he can’t name.  

“Well,” Ven says, rolling his sleeve up so he could wipe his nose on his forearm. “I guess it’s time. This bond is an oath you will remember each other until you close your eyes for the last time, for the tragedy to forget is to be alone forever. Do you accept this?”

“I do,” Terra says.

Aqua hums. “Yes, I do.”

Ven smiles. “You know what to do.”

With his free hand, Terra presses two fingers to his chest, over his heart, where he builds a golden glow. Twenty years living with her, ten years in darkness thinking about her, this vow is impossible to break—even if they can’t do this any longer, Terra could never forget her. Never. In his hand is now a piece of himself, a nugget of his heart, a memory of her in his bed that he never wants to lose.

He takes those fingers to her chest, two thick golden threads drawn out from his heart. She winces at the touch, quick to dissolve. Stormfall shifts in his hand, growing longer, its hilt thicker and darker, wrapping around like a weaved shield. A subtle change, a little piece of him.

Aqua does the same, fingers to her chest first to create the threads, bringing them to his chest. It does hurt, like a needle digging into his skin, sharp for the entire length until it’s suddenly gone. 

He feels full, as though his insides are creating space for something extra. Warm, frightening, whole, exciting. Her piece is a memory he can’t read but he doesn’t need to. Ends of the Earth opens way for an icy blade to cut through the middle as the hilt fans out like wings. A piece of her to take with him where he goes.

“Alright,” Ven chirps, snapping the booklet closed. “The book ends with the quote, Two hearts, only one, but I think this means I can call you husband and wife in secret. So kiss.”

Their Keyblades dissipate when they hold each other, tender but with appetite, unaware of their surroundings for several selfish moments. With sewn threads, it’s as though he breathes through her. Terra presses her onto him, feeling how her heart now beats in sync with his.

“I love you,” she whispers. They are married. 

He’ll never tire of hearing it. Stars, they are married. “I love you, too.”

Terra hears Ven sniff before a handkerchief is shoved into his face. “You need your face dry and clean before everyone sees you,” Ven says. 

The sunset now is deep, a fiery orange. Terra doesn’t want to let go.

“I’ll hold you again tonight,” Aqua says, patting his chest. “I want to see the meteor shower Ven promised.”

“It’ll be a good one,” Ven assures.

Terra kisses her. “Then we have to make a run for it.” He picks Ven up like a log, jogging through the thicket of the forest with Aqua close behind him, the Master in her arms. When they approach the castle, in the twilight, they hear chatter coming from the halls, as though ghosts are partying outside. 

Terra feels at peace despite that he now has to perform, balancing on a tightrope where he doesn’t care if he falls. He turns around and holds her neck to kiss her again, feeling her laughter in his mouth. “One more?” he asks when they break. 

Ven, still tucked in Terra’s arm, groans. “I never asked for a front seat to the kissing show. Is this my punishment?”

Aqua kisses him one more time, whispering to him I love you for what will be a string of I love you’s in the night to come. Friends will cheer, Terra will trip on the way to the altar, Sora will cry because Terra will cry, Xion will eat too much cake and get sick, Isa will laugh because he is drunk, Kairi will be the star of the dance, Aqua will be the star in his eyes. 

[myhockeyworld87]

Not So Dangerous Liaison - Sidney Crosby - Part 18

Word Count: 3,779

POV: Reader

Warnings: Language, NSFW, Smut

Notes: Well it’s finally time for their first date. It only took 18 parts to get there...haha! Hope you guys enjoy! Happy Reading

Not So Dangerous Liaison Masterlist

You weren't sure why you were nervous about your date with Sid. It wasn't as if the two of you hadn't been practically living together for the last three weeks. Plus, you were literally spending the next two months together. But this just felt different. "What should I wear?" You asked Sid as he brought in the last suitcase from the car. You were already rummaging through one of yours looking for your makeup.

 "It doesn't matter, you always look nice, but I'm probably going to wear a suit but no tie." That fancy was your first immediate thought. Thank god you'd packed some dresses, per Sid's request, though you thought you'd need them more in Europe than in Cole Harbour.

 "Ok so dress it is then." You had the perfect one in mind for the warm summer night. Now you just needed to remember which suitcase it was in. Sid's master bedroom was starting to look like a tornado hit it as the two of you started unpacking things. "You sure we should be doing this tonight? Look at the mess we have."

 "Yes, tonight. I have everything planned."

 "Planned? I thought this was a spur of the moment thing?"

 "Well, I may have made a phone call or two while my mom had you occupied." Oh, he was sly; you filed this information away for later, for you hadn't really seen this side of Sid yet.

 "So where are we going?"

 "That's a surprise." You started hanging up things in the closet, trying to clean up some of the mess that you'd both made. "I'm going to grab a quick shower." He yelled and you were half tempted to ask if he wanted company, but then the two of you would never get ready.

 "Ok, I'm going to finish unpacking." By the time you heard the shower turn off, you had most of your things put away. "My turn," you told Sid, as you walked into the bathroom. He had a towel slung low on his hips and the sight of water dripping off him totally turned you on.

 "You should've just showered with me." He protested, grabbing your waist and pulling you close to him, so he could drop kisses all over your body. "I could always go back in with you."

 "Sure, but then we aren't going out tonight and you know it."

 He frowned and released you. "True," he said and then swatted your ass. "You better get going then." You took a quick shower, then started to get ready beside Sid. It was way too distracting him just standing there wrapped only in a towel, so when your silk kimono robe you had on slipped open a bit, you didn't adjust it, just going about brushing your hair before grabbing the blow dryer. "Are you trying to tempt me?" He asked looking at you through the mirror.

 "I'm sorry, what? Can't hear you?" Of course, you could hear him, but you pretended not to over the blow dryer. You leaned to the side drying your hair, giving him a nice view of your breast and smirking at the same time.

 "Really (Y/N)?" He laughed knowing your game. "It's not going to work. I'm taking you out tonight, but when we get home…" He let the rest hang in the air before heading out of the bathroom, adjusting himself as he walked out which had you chuckling. It took you about forty-five minutes to finish getting ready, though you were definitely pleased with your reflection in the mirror. "Babe, are you almost ready?" Sid hollered up as you gave yourself one last glance to make sure your makeup was perfect.

 "On my way down." With one little squirt of perfume, you grabbed your bag and headed downstairs to meet Sid. He was standing at the bottom of the stairs, in his favorite black suit, traditional white shirt unbuttoned at the collar, holding a long-stemmed red rose. The sight literally took your breath away. You'd seen him in the suit all the time, but this, this was completely different, because this time he was wearing it for you. You smiled at him as you descended the stairs.

 "Wow, you look absolutely amazing." He said as soon as your heel hit the last step. You'd chosen a white knee-length lace dress that was form fitting to your body. Your hair was curled in soft waves down your back and you'd kept your makeup fairly neutral with a pale pink lip.

 "Thank you. You look very handsome as well." His hand, the one not holding the rose, moved to your hip as he stepped closer to you so that he could press a kiss to your lips. It was a bit heated but also too short for your liking. "You know, I don't normally kiss on the first date." You said playfully.

 "Hmm, well I'll consider myself lucky then. This is for you." You accepted the rose that he handed over, bringing it to your nose to inhale its sweet fragrance. "And before you say it, no I did not just pull it out of the ones I already got you."

 You laughed, as the thought hadn't really crossed your mind until he mentioned it. "Well, you didn't need to get me anymore that's for sure. You're spoiling me."

 "That's the idea," and he gave you a wink before offering you his arm as the two of you headed to the car. The drive was beautiful and Sid pointed out different sights here and there, as well as places he wanted to take you during your time here. It was about twenty minutes later you were pulling into a parking lot by the dock. You looked over and there was a large boat or was it a ship? You weren't sure which was the proper term, but it was beautiful as lights outline its features showing it off.

 "Are we going on that?"

 "Yeah, hope that's ok?" Ok, it was more than ok. You could tell that he'd rented the whole thing out for just the two of you.

 "It's perfect, Sid." He came around and opened your door then led you down the dock to what you now considered had to be called a yacht. There was a small table set up for the two of you, that had a beautiful arrangement of flowers in the center. How he'd made all these plans in such a short amount of time you'd never know. Even though you couldn't ask for a better first date, you couldn't resist teasing Sid just a little. "So is now a good time to tell you I get seasick?" He looked physically ill as he looked over at you, and suddenly you felt bad, but you couldn't contain the laugh that bubbled up from inside you. "Just kidding."

 "Oh my god, you had me seriously worried there for a minute."

 "I'm sorry," you told him as you patted his chest, and he held your hand there for just a few seconds longer. "I had to do it."

 "You know I'll get you back."

 With your heels on you didn't have to far to reach up and press your lips to his. "Mmm, I'm sure you will." Just then a man, who you assumed to be the captain came out and greeted you. As you climbed aboard the vessel, Sid reluctantly released your hand so that the gentleman could help you board. There was a small crew and they all had wide eyes as they were introduced to Sidney. You could tell they all wanted to either ask for an autograph or photo, but didn't as they were working. They went to work right away getting the vessel ready to push off and head out. Sid took you to the bow of the boat as it slowly moved away from the dock. The sun was just starting its descent but it made for a beautiful picture as it reflected off the water. "Sid, I can't believe you did all this."

 "It was nothing."

 "Stop, you put a lot of time and thought into this and I really appreciate it. This has to be the most magical first date I've ever been on." A cute little blush rose to his cheek, as his arms wrapped around you and pulled your back against his chest as you watched the majestic scenery of Nova Scotia.

 "Well, hopefully, this will be the last first date for both of us." They may have been Sid's words but it was exactly what you were thinking. If you never had another first date in your life, this one would go down as perfect even though it had only just begun, but then it didn't matter what else happened the rest of the night, because this moment right here was everything.

 You shifted in his arms then, so that you were face to face. "I would be one hundred percent ok with this being my last first date, so long as you're taking me on my second, and third, and all those after that." That smile that you loved graced his face, the right side just picking up ever so slightly and you couldn't help but kiss those lips. Your hands glided around his neck as the kiss deepened and you almost forget where you were and that there was probably a crew member watching the two of you. You broke apart, his forehead just leaning against yours as you took a moment to catch your breath.

 "Come on, they probably have dinner ready." You made your way back to the stern where you'd seen the small dining table setup before. Sid held out your chair for you, before taking the one that was on the other side and moving it closer. The round table was set so that you could be across from each other, but the beautiful centerpiece didn't allow you to see each other, so Sid made it so you could. After a second, he grabbed your hand, kissing your knuckles. You could tell there was something he wanted to say but then he was interrupted as the chef came out bringing out the first course that he'd prepared.

 The chef brought out crostinis topped with gorgonzola cheese, roasted walnuts, and arugula to start with, which were mouthwatering. Second appetizers followed, with a salad and soup after that before they brought a beef wellington that was absolutely to die for. By the time dessert came, you were so full, you weren't sure you could even have a bite of it. That was until he set it down between both you and Sid for you to share. It was a decadent molten chocolate lava cake, with strawberries placed around it for decoration. Sid grabbed a spoon and dipped it into the dessert, then brought it to your lips to feed you. It was actually super cute and something you never expected him to do. Your lips closed around the spoon, and you closed your eyes at its heavenly taste. "Mmm, that's delicious."

 "Watching you eat it was the treat for me." You smiled then grabbed the spoon out of his hand to feed him a bite. "You're right this is really good." The two of you fed each other a few more pieces before calling it quits because you were both stuffed. "Dance with me?" Sid asked as the music that had been playing softly in the background became a bit more prevalent. You took his offered hand and the two of you swayed around the deck of the boat. The sun was just setting and you would've given anything to have a picture of the two of you dancing in the twilight on the ship. As if reading your mind, Sid pulled away and asked one of the crew members to snap a few shots. You knew they were going to turn out beautifully as shades of pink, yellows, and blues all melded together to cast a glow on the water. You were almost finished when off to the side something caught your eye.

 "Was that?"

 "Whale on the port side," one of the crew yelled out as you saw the splash of water just trickle away.

 "Oh my god, I've never seen one this close before." Your excitement was hard to contain and you found yourself, grabbing Sid's hand and heading toward the left side of the boat to see if you could see it again. You were scanning the water, looking for signs of where the whale was, as Sid wrapped his arms around you to look as well.

 A few of the crew members were up towards the front of the boat, and one of them yelled down that there was a small pod up ahead. The two of you moving effortlessly together to get a closer look. It was then that one of them breached the water, bringing its large body mostly out of the water then splashing back down. You couldn't contain your excitement and were bouncing up and down on your heels; Sid's arm holding you as if he thought you were going to jump in the water with them. "This is amazing," you whispered back to him. There a bright smile on his face, even though he'd probably seen this before many times as a kid, he still shared your excitement. Just then a couple more surfaced their blowholes spraying water everywhere before heading back under the surface of the water. The sky got darker and you watched a little longer, for the whales to again resurface. They did a few more times before you lost sight of them completely. "I can't believe we got to see all that."

 "It was pretty amazing," Sid admitted, then nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck.

 "I'm so mad I forgot to grab my phone."

 "We can come out another time. This is really the best time of year to see them." He told you. "Maybe we can do a whole day trip or something."

 "Oh, you don't have to rent out this whole boat again just for me to get some pics, Sid." This date was probably costing him a small fortune.

 "I will if it means I get to see you smile like that again."

 You linked your hands behind his neck, drawing him closer to you. "You make me smile like this every day, just by being you." He truly did. You never realized how happy one man could make you just by simply being there. It dawned on you then that you loved this man with your whole heart and you wanted to just shout it from this boat, but then this was technically your first date and well that just seemed really awkward. So, instead, you kissed him, pouring all that love you had into the kiss. You weren't sure how long the two of you stayed like that, just sort of making out while the boat sailed around the water. It wasn't until you shivered from the cold, that Sid broke the kiss to rub his hands up and down your arms.

 "Cold?"

 "At little," you shrugged and he took off his jacket draping it around your shoulder. Immediately, you were engulfed by his heat and reminded of that night weeks ago when he'd walked you back from the restaurant after the whole incident with Christian. This moment was so completely different from then, though that night he'd made you feel so cherished and protected. You still felt all those things right now, only there was so much more and the fact that you loved him just magnified all those feelings.

 "We can go inside if you want."

 "No, I like being out here with you and all the stars around us." Both of you looked up in the sky, millions of stars twinkling in the night. From the moment Sid asked you out, you'd known this date would be perfect, but it even went beyond that. He moved you both to the back of the boat, where you were shielded a bit from the night air. There was a blanket laying on the cushions for your use, and you sat down covering both you and Sid with it as you watched the sky above you. "Thank you for tonight," you whispered over after he had tucked you into his side.

 "You don't have to thank me, (Y/N). I've been wanting to do this for so long now." He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead, before pulling back slightly to look in your eyes. "So, does this mean I get a second date?"

 You pretended to mull it over a bit. "Hmm, I mean this one's not over yet, but if you're asking, then I'm saying yes."

 "Excellent, then I'll have to start planning again."

 You just chuckled before saying, "It doesn't have to be this extravagant you know."

 "We talked about this. I enjoy spoiling you remember?" It was hard to forget the conversation that happened earlier in the day, so you simply nodded your head not wanting to ruin the moment by telling him how unnecessary it was. It was close to eleven when the boat finally docked and you had to bid the captain and crew goodbye. Sid was nice enough to sign a few autographs before you left and take a few pictures. It was definitely a thank you appreciated by everyone on board.

 Finally, back home, Sid came around insisting on getting the door for you before you got out. You found it funny that he didn't park in the garage, but didn't say anything. He laced your fingers together and then walked you to the front door, which seemed a bit odd. "So, I know this isn't a traditional first date, but I thought we could kind of end it somewhat that way." You reached the front door and he unlocked it but didn't open it. "So, I had a really great time tonight," he started to say, both hands now holding yours.

 "Me too."

 "I suppose I don't have to ask you out again since I already did that." You both laughed, knowing that even though you'd agreed to a second date earlier; he didn't even need to ask for your answer would always be yes. After your giggles died down, he leaned in and kissed you. It was sweet and only a tad bit heated as you could tell he was trying to stick to his theme of this being the first date. He broke the kiss first and you found yourself trailing after his lips for just one more touch. "So, I'll call you," he said then squeezed your hands and started to walk away.

 You were slightly confused but recovered quickly. "Hey Sid," you called after he was about five steps away and he looked back at you with the cutest smile on his face. "It's not my house, but would you want to come in for a drink?" He started back towards you.

 "A drink, eh?"

 When he was close enough to you, you grabbed his shirt and hauled him close to you. "Or maybe something else instead." You kissed him hard, letting him know what your idea of something else was. He blindly found the door handle opening it and you both stumbled inside causing you to break apart. "Where were you going?" You asked between kisses.

 He fumbled in his pocket then, grabbing the car fob and locking it. "Was gonna put the car in the garage, but it can stay out." Sid locked the front door then went back to kissing you before scooping you up bridal style and carrying you up the stairs. "By the way, thought you didn't normally kiss on the first date?"

 "I'm making an exception." He set you back on your feet once you were in the bedroom. Hands roaming everywhere. You undid the buttons of his shirt before peeling it off and letting it fall to the floor, while his fingers found your zipper, freeing you from the confines of your dress. He pushed the straps off your shoulders and your dress joined his shirt. Sid kissed your neck, working his way to the swell of your breasts. His hands made short work of your bra clasp, as you undid his belt and pants. He kicked them off then laid you back against the mattress, following you down, rolling you both on your sides. Your hands roamed down his back, then up his chest, as if you couldn't get enough of him and the truth was you couldn't.

 "Damn (Y/N), I want you so bad." Sid breathed out, as he lifted your leg over the top of his, flexing his hips into you.

 "I want you to Sid." There was no denying the way either of you felt at that moment. You pushed at his boxer briefs, freeing his cock so you could stroke its length. He hissed in a breath at the contact relishing the feel of your fingers working their magic on him. Sid worked his hand between your bodies and down to your panties, slipping them under the waistband and between your folds. His thumb played with your clit as he pumped two fingers inside of you. You knew that he was teetering on the edge just as much as you were. "I need you inside me." And before you could say anything more, Sid flipped you on your back and stripped you of your panties.

 He positioned himself between your legs then entered you in one smooth motion. "Yes, Sid, yes." You told him as he filled your body. That familiar rhythm the two of you had was almost instant, each of you knowing what movements would set the other afire. As he picked up his pace, you felt the familiar strings of orgasm start to build and soon you fell off that cliff as your climax hit. Sid reached his high at the same time, spilling inside you. The fact that he was no longer wearing a condom made the whole thing that much more intimate. It was that closeness that had you wanting to tell him how much you loved him, but you weren't sure if he was ready to hear that; so instead, you kissed him tenderly, stroking your hands down his back. You weren't quite sure when would be a good time to tell him, but you knew it would be soon; if only because you weren't sure you could hold it back any longer.

[lyranova]

Neva’s Birthday

Hi guys~! So it’s my OC Neva’s birthday today 🥰! I decided to write this for her (i had another moodboard for her but its very spoiler-y for Fractured)! Also to clear something up, Vangeance isn’t ordering them to throw her a party he’s ordering them to take the day off 😅! Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this I had so much fun, its not really canon for Fractured but it has some parts from my series in it!

Taglist: @thoughtfullyrainynightmare @succulentsunrise (i wasn’t sure if you wanted to read this or not 😅)

Word Count: 3,784

Warnings: None

———

Neva couldn’t stop the sigh from escaping her as she looked at the calendar. It was March 31st; her birthday. She hadn’t told anyone, except for the Captain, and as far as she knew he was the only one that knew. She never made a big deal out of it, mostly the Captain would give her the day off, although when she was younger he tended to buy her a couple of gifts. But she had made him stop when she turned 15 and had made the decision to join the magic knights, she didn’t want anyone to know that they knew each other beforehand. She quickly tied the bottom of her braid with her small ribbon and looked at her reflection again.

“ Gods I’m getting old.”

“ Neva, are you awake?” She heard Mimosa call from the other side of her bedroom door, Neva stood up and walked towards the door and opened it.

“ Yeah, what’s up?” Neva asked as she noticed Klaus and Yuno were standing behind her, Neva leaned against her door frame and crossed her arms.

“ We’re headed out on a mission, just some bandits in the woods nearby, are you ready to go?” Mimosa asked, Neva blinked, usually she wouldn’t turn down such a mission, but today wasn’t a usual day.

“ Sorry, I can’t. I have the day off.” She shrugged and watched the surprise flash across her friends' faces.

“ T-The day off? You never have the day off!” Klaus said in disbelief. He wasn’t wrong, Neva never wanted to take a day off, she loved her job and always wanted a chance to prove herself to everyone. But not today, today she just wanted some peace and quiet.

“ I know. But I just felt like it was time y’know?” She told them before pushing herself off the door frame, she walked past the threshold and closed it behind her. “ You guys go and take care of the bandits, and be careful alright?” She told them before walking past them and down the hall. There was a certain spot at the base where she liked to hang out on her birthday, and that's where she was headed.

Yuno and the others blinked as she walked away, why didn’t she want to go on a mission? Was she ill? Yuno had no clue, but it wasn’t like her. Maybe...she was going to meet someone? He shook his head, no, that wasn’t it. She would’ve mentioned it if she was dating someone, wouldn’t she? Even if she was seeing someone, why would he care?

“ Yuno,” Klaus called, suddenly pulling Yuno out of his thoughts. “ Has Neva told you anything? Like if she were sick or she had a prior engagement?” He asked as he crossed his arms, Yuno shrugged.

“ No. Why would she?” He asked a little confused, why would she tell him something but not the others?

“ Well, you two do hang out a lot more. I always see you talking in the halls, going around the capital, and even going on missions together. So I assumed she maybe would have mentioned something.” Klaus said with a shrug, Yuno frowned, they weren’t always together were they? I mean, there have been a few times that it was only the two of them, but it wasn’t anything like what Klaus was insinuating.

“ No, and we don’t hang out all the time. We just happen to always be going in similar directions is all.” Yuno told him, he noticed the disbelief in their eyes and he glared. “ Stop it. You’re trying to make it into something that it isn’t.” He muttered before walking away.

“ Uh-huh, so it’s all just a coincidence?” Mimosa teased in a hushed tone as she followed behind him.

“ One time is what I’d call a coincidence, multiple times though, usually means something.” Klaus muttered as he also followed behind them. Klaus and Mimosa began whispering amongst themselves, counting all the times they had seen the two talking, joking around, and training together. It was more than just mere coincidences.

They liked each other.

———-

As the three Golden Dawn members walked through the halls they noticed their captain, William Vangeance, walking out of his office. He turned to them with a slight frown on his face.

“ I thought you three had already left for your mission?” He asked in a somewhat confused tone, he had briefed them a few minutes ago so he assumed they would already be on their way to the bandits location by now.

“ We went to go get Neva and bring her with us, but she said she had the day off sir.” Mimosa explained, the Captain chuckled softly before nodding.

“ Of course she does, she always gets today off every year.” He told them, he watched as confusion spread across the others faces. His eyebrows raised in slight surprise. “ Oh, I guess she didn’t tell you. It’s her birthday today. I always give her today off, I assumed she would have told you three.” He added with a frown, to say he was completely surprised that she neglected to tell her friends would be a lie. As far as he knew he was the only one who knew her birthday was today.

“ It’s her birthday?!” All three exclaimed in surprise, they had absolutely no idea. She never mentioned it, not even once. She knew all of their birthdays, but not one of them knew hers. The Captain nodded.

“ Yes it is,” he chuckled softly. “ she probably forgot to mention it.” Yuno frowned slightly at the look in his captain's eyes, it was as though he knew that Neva hadn’t forgotten to mention it. But Yuno didn’t push him on it, he knew he would just give another excuse.

“ How about this; I’ll give your mission to Alecdora and a couple of others and you three can have the day off as well? I’m sure you’ll want to give Neva presents and maybe a cake.” Vangeance told them with a small smile, Yuno picked up on the tone. It wasn’t a question, it was an order. The three of them wouldn’t be going on that mission today.

“ Is that an order Captain?” Yuno asked, even though he already knew the answer. Vangeance nodded, his smile never leaving his face.

“ If that's the only way any of you will listen, then yes, it is.” Vangeance said before turning to walk away. ‘ Do try to make it fun and memorable for her, please. She deserves it.’ He thought with a small smile as he walked away, leaving the three Golden Dawn members alone.

Yuno, Mimosa, and Klaus just stared at him as he walked away. They were given the day off as well? Actually, they were ordered too. But the three of them didn’t really mind, as now they could plan something for Neva’s birthday.

“ Alright team, new plan!” Klaus announced with a clap of his hands, the others looked at him. “ Neva currently thinks we’re on our way to the bandits hideout, now that’ll give us a couple of hours to buy things and plan a party.So, who wants to be in charge of what?” He asked before crossing his arms.

“ Ooh I can get stuff to make her a birthday cake!” Mimosa said cheerfully, the others frowned.

“ Why don’t we just buy her a cake?” Yuno asked in a confused tone, he wondered if Mimosa even knew how to cook let alone bake. It would just be easier to buy one, he even knew where her favorite bakery was and could go get it.

“ Because it’ll mean more if we make it ourselves!” Mimosa argued as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. “ Hm, should we all buy her separate presents or all get one together?” Mimosa thought aloud as she put a hand under her chin. Klaus frowned in thought also.

“ Hm, I say we all agree on something. That way it’ll mean more and she’ll know we were all thinking of her.” Klaus decided, Yuno smirked a bit.

“ You’re only saying that because we don’t have time to go shopping on our own.” Yuno watched Klaus blush furiously as he pushed his glasses up his nose.

“ N-No, that’s not the only reason!” Klaus exclaimed before clearing his throat. “ Anyway, let’s go figure out somewhere we can plan more discreetly. Just in case Neva happens to see us.” Klaus added before walking away, Mimosa and Yuno followed.

——-

“ Ok, so we have all the stuff for a cake, and we have some decorations. Now all we need is a gift!” Mimosa said as she set all the ingredients to make a cake down on the table, they had asked to borrow the kitchen and mess hall for a short while and, luckily, they were given permission to do so. Yuno frowned as he looked over the ingredients, he noticed there was a key ingredient missing.

“ Where’s the cocoa powder?” He asked Mimosa, who turned to him with a confused frown.

“ Cocoa powder? I didn’t pick any up.” Mimosa said, looking very confused, Klaus did as well. Yuno sighed and shook his head before going over to the cabinets and looking through them.

“ Neva’s favorite cake is chocolate, especially if it has a strawberry filling in the middle. As far as icing goes she isn’t really picky, she’ll pretty much take anything as long as it isn’t too sweet. She also likes to have a little crunch so if we can find some vanilla cookies maybe we can put those around it, why are you two looking at me like that?” Yuno asked with a frown.

Mimosa and Klaus were just staring at him, wide eyes and raised eyebrows. Yuno didn’t really try to get to know anyone, much like Neva, so for him to know what her favorite cake was, is pretty surprising. Mimosa and Klaus shared a look which only confused Yuno further, it was as though he had confirmed something.

“ What?” He repeated, making the two snap to attention.

“ Oh it’s just surprising that you know what her favorite cake is, that's all!” Mimosa said with an embarrassed laugh.

“ Not really. She orders it a lot whenever she gets paid, she also likes to have a small cup of tea with it as well. I’ll have to look and see if we have any.” He muttered the last part to himself. Klaus and Mimosa blinked at him.

“ He even knows what she likes to drink?!” Klaus whispered and she nodded.

“ Apparently so! How can he not like her if he notices all those things?!” Mimosa whispered back, when suddenly Bell appeared next to them.

“ I wish Yuno paid attention to me like he does her! He’s always with her, always notices what she’s doing, he’s even drawn her!” She huffed causing the two Golden Dawn members to jump before looking at the young Wind Spirit.

“ Drawn?” They asked with a confused tilt of their heads, they didn’t know Yuno could draw. He never showed them any of his art nor did he even show an interest in it. Bell nodded before pulling out a big notepad, although they didn’t really know where she pulled it out from.

“ I went looking for this when I heard you all planning a surprise party and you needed a present. Maybe one of Yuno’s drawings would be good.” Bell suggested before handing it to Mimosa. She flipped it open, Klaus watching over her shoulder, and saw quite a few beautiful sketches of scenery, some of the buildings, one of Asta and the people at the church, and then one that surprised them.

It was of Neva, smiling in awe, with bright eyes full of wonder. Her hair in its normal braid falling over her shoulder, she was bent over staring at or into something and whatever it was made her very happy. This picture was the only one colored. The background was dark, with warm oranges and soft yellows gracing her face and the area she was in, she had a soft blush on her cheeks, and it looked like there were lanterns around. Mimosa frowned a bit, it looked like the lanterns you’d see at the Star Festival. Mimosa and Klaus both smiled softly, he did like her and this drawing proved it. This was how she looked to him, she was a warm, sweet, and beautiful person.

“ Wow, Yuno, this is beautiful! You should give this to Neva!” Mimosa said softly as she turned to him, he quickly walked over and snatched it out of her hands.

“ No.” He answered simply before tucking the notepad next to his grimoire. They weren’t supposed to see the drawings, especially not that one. That picture was special to him. It was the first time he ever truly saw Neva, the side of her she didn’t want anyone to see. As far as he knew she didn’t even know that he knew, and he wanted to keep it that way.

“ Why not? It's beautiful and I’m sure she’d-.” Klaus started before Yuno cut him off.

“ I said no.” Yuno snapped coldly, causing both Mimosa and Klaus to look surprised once again. He sighed before rubbing the back of his neck. “ I apologize. I shouldn’t have snapped.” He muttered before going back to looking for the tea.

“ It’s ok if you like her y’know,” Mimosa started gently. “ I mean, you can have a crush on her and still be friends if that's what you’re worried about! Or if you’re worried she doesn’t feel the same way all you can do is ask and find out!” Mimosa told him.

“ You need to start on the cake.” Yuno told them curtly, effectively changing the subject. Both Klaus and Mimosa exchanged another look before doing as they were told.

Yuno couldn’t figure out why Mimosa was trying to convince him what he was feeling was a crush, Neva was nothing more than a friend. Friends knew what their friends favorite cake was, how their eyes lit up anytime dessert was mentioned, how they went from a smirk to a smile whenever they really enjoyed something, how sweet her laugh was…he shook his head quickly to rid himself of these thoughts. He couldn’t have a crush on her; they were teammates, allies, and close friends. He didn’t want to ruin any of that. He also needed to focus on becoming the Wizard King, there was no time for silly things such as crushes.

——

Neva sighed as she watched the sun set from the tallest building at the Golden Dawn HQ. This was her favorite spot in the entire place, she could sit there all day and no one would bother her. Which was why she decided to spend her birthdays here, every year.

“ Took you long enough.” Neva teased as she heard someone walk over to her, she turned to her right and saw Vangeance standing there, a soft smile on his face.

“ I apologize, I was held up in a meeting.” He said as he sat next to her, this was their thing. Neva spent a majority of her birthday up here, by herself, but for an hour or two Vangeance would come and sit with her and talk.

“ Happy birthday by the way.” He added, causing her to shake her head.

“ Thanks, but I’m getting so old! Look, I’m getting wrinkles!” She said pointing to non existent wrinkles, Vangeance chuckled before shaking his head.

“ No you’re not, you’re still young and wrinkleless, so please stop worrying.” He told her, he usually brought a small cake for them to share, but Neva noticed it was absent. She wondered why, but decided she would keep it to herself for now.

“ So, may I ask why you decided not to tell the others today was your birthday?” He asked after they had sat in silence for a moment, he saw the surprise on her face and a tinge of pink appear on her cheeks.

“ It’s none of their business.” She muttered, pulling her knees up and hugging them.

“ You’re right, it is none of their business. But they’re your friends, so I’m sure they would have liked to know. I would’ve thought you’d at least tell Yuno about it.” Vangeance said and watched as her face became more pink at the mention of the young man, so it was true, she did have a crush on him.

“ He doesn’t need to know that.” She muttered looking away, she didn’t want to get too close to them, it would only hurt him and the others if they did. It would also hurt her.

“ It’s ok to tell people little things like that, I’m sure you know everyones birthdays here, so tell them yours. It’s a way for you to gain their trust. I understand you don’t want to tell them certain things and that’s ok. But, if you want to become Captain someday, you need to trust, and become trusted.” Vangeance told her softly and watched as she thought about his words. She needed to learn to trust others as she trusted him, he wasn’t going to be around forever, so he wanted to make sure she would have people to lean on in case that were to happen sooner rather than later.

“ I know that,” she grumbled before sighing and looking at him. “ I just...I just don’t want anyone to get hurt, or to feel hurt.” She muttered before setting her legs down and looking away from him.

“ I know that, but you can’t always control what happens. People will get hurt, even if you don’t want or intend for them too, that’s just life Neva.” He explained softly before a frown appeared on his face.

“ Why do you trust me so much?” He asked, he watched as surprise graced her face, she wasn’t expecting that question. Vangeance had a feeling he knew her answer, but he wanted to hear her reason. He watched her contemplate her answer for a good few minutes.

“ I…” she started before suddenly a loud boom and a cloud of black smoke appeared. They both stood up and rushed down the tower. Were they under attack?

——-

As Neva and Vangenace ran through the halls they noticed the smoke and the boom had come from the kitchen. Why would the enemy go for the kitchen? Neva walked through the doors, her grimoire out, and frowned at the sight.

Mimosa was standing there, surrounded by smoke, and she tried to clear it away while coughing. Klaus’s face was covered in dirt, actually, all of their faces were but his moreso, he pulled his glasses off to clean them and shook his head. While Yuno, well, he was just done and his face expressed that completely.

“ I told you we should’ve just bought her a cake.” Yuno told them deadpan, and both Mimosa and Klaus turned.

“ Who would’ve thought the oven would explode?!” Klaus shouted, Yuno’s face didn’t change at all.

“ I did. Because the three of us have no idea what we’re doing.” He was right, they didn’t know what to do at all. They were winging it and in the process almost burned down the entire Golden Dawn kitchen!

“ U-Um...what are you three doing?” Neva asked with a confused tilt of her head. Vangeance walked up beside her, looking slightly confused himself, he had assumed they would go buy her things. The three in question turned to look at her.

“ W-Well,” Mimosa started with a bashful laugh.

“ We were trying to bake a cake for your birthday.” Yuno finished, there wasn’t a point in lying to her. Neva blinked before looking around, the kitchen was a complete mess.

“ I thought you all were on a mission?” She asked with a frown and she crossed her arms.

“ The Captain gave us the day off, so we decided to try and make you a cake with the spare time we had.” Klaus explained, she turned to glare at Vangeance, who only shrugged in response and a small smile was on his face.

Neva shook her head before turning back to the others, she truly appreciated the effort, but she didn’t understand why they would go to such lengths for her. She didn’t do anything to deserve a party, hell she didn’t even tell them that today was her birthday! So why did they feel the need to go out of their way to surprise her? Looking around, seeing how much of a mess they had made, the black powder on their faces from when the oven had blown up, and the completely toasted cake that sat on the counter in front of them made Neva laugh, not the small soft ones she normally did, but a loud roaring laugh.

Yuno and the others frowned when she began to laugh, were the smoke fumes making her delirious? Yuno used his wind magic to get rid of most of the smoke, but he had to admit, hearing her laugh like that made his heart skip a beat. He liked her normal laugh, but this one? This laugh he loved. It was true laughter, the kind you didn’t hear very often, it made his heart flutter, caused butterflies in his stomach, and his face to turn a shade of pink. Yeah, maybe he did have a small crush on her. Neva walked over to them and a small smile was on her face as her laughter died.

“ You three are completely ridiculous, you should’ve just went and bought me a cake instead of going through this trouble.” She started but held up a hand as Mimosa went to speak. “ But, I really appreciate the thought. This has been the most fun I’ve had in a while, thank you.” She added softly before deciding to add one more thing. “ Don’t ever try and cook again.”

Vangeance watched the four with a small smile on his face, he hadn’t heard her laugh like that in a long time, and it made him very happy. He shook his head as he looked at the state of the kitchen.

He did want them to make her birthday memorable and they delivered.

——-

Sorry this isn’t very good, I’ve been having so many doubts about my OC and my OC fic that I’m super nervous about posting this haha 😅. but I hope you all enjoyed it! Thanks for reading and I hope you all have a good day 🥰~!

[alright--okay]

you ever been to a basement show? pt. 4

tsukishima kei x reader

summary: Tsukishima sees you everywhere, and for a big school thats weird. And it’s not like he’s gonna do anything, that’d be even weirder, but one day in your shared lecture he sees you wearing a shirt with some small band’s name. A band he know. And well, now he has to know who you are.

word count: ~2.7 k

a/n: the first five chapters are already on ao3 so imma post them here real quick, hope anyone reading enjoys!

read on ao3!

pt. 4 Go Home. Play Music. Feel Better. - Michael Cera Palin

“Ohoho, look who decided to show up,” you said to Tsukishima as he moved to sit beside you in the lecture hall.

Tsukishima gave you an exasperated look, “class didn’t even start yet. Also please don’t take on those idiots’ mannerisms.”

“Why not? I think it’s fun. And completely unrelated, but want to come to the store with me after class? Bokuto recommended me this hair gel and I’ve always wanted to try-”

“Please stop,” Tsukishima turned to face the front of the class as you broke out into quiet giggles.

“Seriously though, I didn’t get to eat breakfast this morning so I’m gonna get something at that cafe near our apartments if you want to join.”

This wasn’t a date. Tsukishima knew this. That didn’t stop his heart from beating a tad bit faster or the apples of his cheeks growing rosier.

Tsukishima shifted his arm to one of the uncomfortable arm rests of the seat, leaning his head against his hand to hopefully help cover any of the heat on his cheeks, “yeah, I’m down.”

“Cool,” from the corner of his eye, Tsukishima saw you give your own small smile as you turned to focus on the professor about to start the lecture.

This wasn’t a date.

~~~~~~

Class dragged on, but soon enough you and Tsukishima were making the short journey to the cafe.

“Did you finish the paper for that class?” Tsukishima asked.

“What paper?”

“The one he assigned last week? Due on Wednesday? The one on that civilization-”

“Wait, no, no, no. That paper’s due on the 18th.”

“y/n…” Tsukshima slowed his pace to look you in your eyes, “Wednesday is the 18th.”

You let a quiet “fuck” slip from your mouth as you faced forward, moving quickly to the cafe now only a few shops away, “then no, I haven’t even started it.”

“Yeah that seemed pretty obvious,” Tsukishima said with a smirk.

“He never mentioned it again! I can’t keep track of everything!”

“Yeah, not even the date apparently,” Tsukishima snickered, opening the door for the two of you.

“Alright, listen!” Tsukishima’s laugh only grew louder, “I thought this class was gonna be fun and easy, and now I have to write a paper in like two days. Disgusting,” your attentioned moved to the menu hanging above the register.

“It’s short, you’re being dramatic.”

“Fuck you,” Tsukishima let out a startled laugh while you moved forward to give your order and pay then stood off to the side waiting for Tsukishima to do the same.

Tsukishima silently pointed to a table off in the corner that was free, “what is your major anyway?” he said as the two of you settled down into the seats.

You told him your major with a small shrug, “Nothing too special, but I liked it in high school so I figured I’d just keep up with it. Are you actually archeology or are you also just in this class for the hell of it?”

Tsukishima rolled his eyes, “Yes, I’m an archeology major, but this class doesn’t count for much since it's pretty entry level.”

“So what you’re saying is that you’re good at this stuff?”

“I’m not writing your paper.” “I wouldn’t ask that!” you said with a frown, “I was wondering if you could at least help me though. Read it over, give me some advice, make sure it’ll give me a decent grade, stuff like that. Come on, I’ll make you cookies.”

Tsukishima paused for a moment, “What about a strawberry shortcake?”

“I mean I’ll have to go to the store…” Tsukishima continued to stare at you, “but fine! Yes, I’ll make you a strawberry shortcake, you bastard.” You mumbled the last part under your breath as you got up to get yours and Tsukishima’s orders.

Making a cake would be a small price to pay for a good grade in a class you honestly didn’t care about. Spending time with Tsukishima didn’t hurt either.

“Get as much of it done as you can tonight, I’m done with class pretty early tomorrow so we can work on it together at my place whenever you’re free,” Tsukishima gave you the short rundown as you place the food on the table.

“Why don’t we do it at my place? You have like three roommates. I have Yachi.”

“Good point, text me tomorrow when you’re good,” Tsukishima said with a small nod.

~~~

It was a little past one on tuesday when you decided to text Tsukishima.

To Tsukishima archeology:

hey im walking home now so feel free to come over whenever

From Tsukishima archeology:

alright ill be there soon

You slid your phone back into your pocket, trying to turn your focus on the music flowing through your headphones and not on the lanky blonde that would be spending the rest of the day in your apartment.

You saw Tsukishima at least three times a week and most of that time was spent alone with each other in class or recitation, but this was… different. You were going to be actually alone with the guy. No distractions from a professor or a friend or a cafe worker calling out names. And okay Tsukishima was mildly attractive… Okay he was attractive but you wouldn’t let that come between you and the new friend you made in the snarky asshole.

It's not like anything would happen anyway. Tsukishima definitely didn’t like you like that, and no amount of daydreaming him confessing to you would make it come true (even if it was a very nice daydream).

It wasn’t long before you made it up to your apartment. Yachi had a late class today so you weren’t expecting her back until tonight, hopefully after Tsukishima had already left. It wasn’t that you didn’t want Yachi to know… but Yachi had already been making assumptions and Tsukishima coming over to “do work” alone in your room would do nothing but feed her imagination (even if it was the truth).

In the middle of eating a quick snack, Tsukishima sent you a text saying he was at your building.

You scrambled down the staircase of your building to meet Tsukishima who was waiting (somewhat) patiently on the stoop of your building.

“Finally,” he muttered as you widened the door for him to pass.

“You gave me no warning! Should’ve left you out here longer.”

“Should I just leave then? Seems like you don’t want me here so I’ll just-”

You put your hands on Tsukishima’s back, pushing him further into the building, “Nope, you’re helping me. You already agreed, no backing out.”

Tsukishima let out a dramatic sigh, now trailing behind you, “Did you at least start it?”

“Yes, in fact, I did. Almost done too, just need one more paragraph to push me over the word minimum.”

“What am I supposed to do in the meantime? I thought I was just gonna read it over?” Tsukishima asked as you let him into your and Yachi’s apartment, leading him to your small kitchen table.

“I dunno, dude; do other homework, work on your own paper, pick an album to listen to,” you gestured lazily towards your bedroom door, “all my vinyl is in the crates to the right.”

You could tell Tsukishima tried very hard to hide his excitement, “well, I already submitted my paper,” he ‘casually’ slid his backpack off his shoulders and made his way to the door you just pointed out.

You followed him over, showing him the milk crates you were talking about, your record player sitting on the dresser nearby.

“If you're gonna be sitting here, I’ll work at my desk,” you gathered your laptop and the notebook you had used to organize your paper, settling at the small desk, “if you need any help let me know.”

Tsukishima gave you a small smile and proceeded to get down on the floor to sit cross legged, flipping through the crate closest to him.

The two of you continued in silence for a while until Tsukishima gave a light poke to your shoulder, a recognizable album in his hand.

“I’ve never actually used a record player, so can you…” he trailed off, pushing the album towards you.

You tried to contain your amusement. Tsukishima clearly did not want to be asking you this, but you were glad he took this route instead of trying it and scratching up your records.

“Yeah sure, good pick by the way,” you got up from your desk chair and took the album, sliding the sleeve out to get to the vinyl itself, this one in particular being a bright blue as opposed to the typical black.

You ran him through how to handle the records and how to work your particular player so he would be able to flip and change the records whenever, and soon enough the beginning of Just Friends’ album Nothing but Love began to play.

You smiled again, making your way back to your desk to finish up your paper while Tsukishima went back to sitting on your floor, alternating between listening to the music and playing on his phone.

By the time the album came to an end you placed your laptop in Tsukishima’s lap, “be gentle,” you said, moving to grab an album at random and replace the one coming to an end.

“I’m not gonna promise anything,” he replied, adjusting his glasses to begin reading your paper.

You wandered off to the kitchen for a glass of water, not wanting to be in the room while Tsukishima was judging your writing.

“It’s not that bad!” Tsukishima called from your room, you walked over to lean in the door frame, “I marked some stuff you should reword and you should probably include that thing he mentioned a while ago…” Tsukishima continued to talk about your paper, flipping through notes to bring up examples and point out which parts he found errors in.

“But not bad?” you questioned again with a small smile, taking your laptop back.

“Not great, but not bad,” he said getting up to get his own stuff from the kitchen.

“I’ll take it!” you took it as a win when you heard Tsukishima’s laughter from the other room.

~~~

It was well into the evening by now, Tsukishima had helped fully finalize your paper a while ago but the two of you continued to talk and do work in your room. At this point you knew Yachi was going to be here soon. You would have to kick Tsukishima out now if you didn’t want her to notice just how long the boy had spent here and that just seemed rude and unnecessary (plus you didn’t really want Tsukishima to go just yet).

“Did you want to just stay for dinner? Yachi said she's picking something up, so if you want anything speak now.”

Tsukishima paused shortly at your question, “where’s she stopping?”

You relayed your and Tsukishima’s order to Yachi hoping she’d get home soon so you could have a proper meal.

You and Tsukishima were back to the floor, sifting through albums and talking over the music in the background.

“I wish you had A Flourish and a Spoil,” Tsukishima said, examining the art of one particular album.

“By The Districts?” Tsukishima’s eyes darted over to you, making you laugh, “I have that one, just probably got misplaced if it’s not with the D’s,” you took a minute to think back to the last time you had listened to the album, trying to place where it currently was.

You hauled yourself up and went to your dresser. Beside your record player was a short stack of albums you had been listening to the other day but were too lazy at the time to properly put away. Sure enough, the dark album art peaked from the pile.

You took the whole stack over to your crates, passing the album to Tsukishima’s waiting hands.

“We’re listening to this next,” Tsukishima said, eyes roaming the back of the album, examining all the details.

“We can definitely do that,” you replied, sorting the albums, “but Yachi’s gonna be here soon so you good with waiting a little bit?”

He gave you a small nod and the two of you resumed your quiet activities with the current record coming to an end. It wasn’t long after you heard the apartment’s door open with Yachi making her presence known.

The three of you sat around the small kitchen table, eating your food and talking about your days. You tried to ignore all of Yachi’s “subtle” looks in favor of asking about the class she just got out of.

“I hate that it lets out so late!” Yachi complained, dropping her head to the table, “I’m so tired and the walk home gets scary in the dark.”

“You can always ask me or Yamaguchi to walk with you,” Tsukishima said, looking up from his food, “if you’re really anxious we really wouldn’t mind, it’s a short walk.”

“Tsukki!” Yachi let out a cry, tears gathering in her eyes, “don’t listen to them, you’re so sweet, I love you.”

“Wait, listen to who-” Yachi interrupted his questions by giving his stiff posture a hug, “what are people saying about me?”

Yachi continued her hug, Tsukishima slowly raising a hand to pat her back, “nothing, nothing, it doesn’t matter anyway.”

You laughed at Tsukishima’s confused and irked expression, clearly not knowing how to interpret Yachi’s words.

Yachi removed herself from Tsukishima, “well, I am exhausted, goodnight,” Yachi said, giving you both a smile.

“Goodnight, Yachi, see you tomorrow,” you said, Tsukishima giving his own goodnight before turning to look you in the eye.

“It’s time,” he said, quickly cleaning up your plates and then heading to your room.

You laughed as you trailed behind him. He was already setting up the vinyl so you settled on your bed, letting your back fall into the comforter sitting atop your mattress.

The opening beats of the first song gently filled your room, quiet enough to not disturb Yachi but loud enough that the thumping drums still hit in your chest. Tsukishima turned around and you patted the spot beside you. He seemed to hesitate for a second before making his way over, letting his body lay beside your own.

“I used to listen to this album all the time in high school,” Tsukishima said to the ceiling. You turned your head to look at his side profile, “I think at the time it was just cause I liked how it sounded,” he paused for a particular chorus to pass, “but now I actually listen to it.”

You turned your head back to the ceiling, “I get that. A lot of albums have changed meaning for me over the years. This always felt like a new beginning though.”

Tsukishima hummed beside you. You let the music fill the room, you and Tsukishima each focusing on the lyrics of each song and how one connected to another.

Side A came to its gentle end, so you got up to slowly flip it, not wanting to break the calm atmosphere your room held at the moment. You took your spot beside Tsukishima again, trying not to disturb him.

“God, this album slaps,” Tsukishima mumbled under his breath at the crescendo of the song, making you break out into a laugh. Tsukishima surprisingly let out a chuckle of his own, “what? You know it's true.”

“I know, I know,” you let your giggles peter out, “I feel like you have to save that for Young Blood though.”

“It can be applied in a variety of places, don’t go around constricting me.”

“Fair enough,” you smiled at him, scooting your legs further on the bed to get more comfortable.

Young Blood, as good of a song as it was, was eight minutes long and by the final words of it, you could feel yourself drifting. It started with just resting your eyes, but soon your body was trying to catch up on the lack of sleep.

As your mind was shutting down, you heard a soft snore beside you. I’ll deal with this tomorrow, you thought to yourself before succumbing to the warmth of your room and the body beside you, letting the final song of the album lull you to sleep.

[thecandywrites]

As Long As You Want To Be

Look, my grandfather (in law, he was my husband’s grandfather but might as well have been mine because that’s how close we were) passed away yesterday. He had dementia and alzheimers and we saw this coming (he has been on his deathbed for a week but the son of a gun was stubborn, god I adored him and am going to miss him) and this is how I have dealt with this on top of everything else hectically happening in my life and this is simply my outlet. But with modern orcs because no one can stop me at this point. Is there homework and big projects due that I should be working on instead? HELL YES. But am I avoiding them because they’re making me face reality? YOU BET. So let me have my emotional support fantasy, if you have happened to read part 1 and part 2 of this story then it’ll be nice to see these guys again and see how things have progressed. 

As Long As You Want To Be

You were in your room in front of your mirrored closet doors, getting ready for today, it was your birthday and it was the big 18- legally an adult and you couldn’t be more relieved it was finally here because you had big plans that the only thing that had been holding you back was your age and you felt a sense of renewal today, like today was a turning point and you had been trying to get your ducks in a row behind the scenes so that when the time came, you could hit the ground running. And today was also your graduation party, all rolled into one huge blow out of a party. 

You curled your long golden brown that ombre-ed into a warm golden blonde hair as you had gotten it colored yesterday, a gift from your aunt Sally at your favorite salon. You had just gotten back from spending an hour at Sephora getting your makeup done, a birthday gift from your sister Grace as she gave your littlest sisters just a light dusting of a shimmering nude eyeshadow so that they felt extra pretty for today too. 

Your mom and your “aunties” got things ready in the kitchen because while you came from a big family, your family “adopted” many others so that you had an even bigger extended family. And they all came out today to show their support and your gift tables were already showing signs of overflowing since half the party came early to help set up for the party and your one gift table soon had to be two and was threatening to turn into three because your parents invited everyone you knew and everyone they knew and everyone came and invited their friends. And while you lived in a sizable suburban house that your parents had had custom built several years ago, it felt overstuffed at the moment and there were still more coming. But with it being a potluck, there was an overabundance of food on the many tables in the huge tents in the backyard. 

You had three younger sisters and one younger brother, who was in the middle of all the girls. You were Brianna Richelle, then there was Blossom Grace who simply went by Grace who was turning 16 next month, then your brother Gavin George- who was 13, Adeline Olivia who was 11 and then the baby, Arianna Lillian who was 8 as Ady and Ari had a few of their friends over as did Grace while you had had all of yours come and spend the night with you the night before while Gavin also got to have some of his friends over, so it was already a very full house. 

And you had especially invited Kihro’s younger sister over to hang out too. Since Kihro’s younger sister Shesly who was only 15 and shy but she was a sweetheart and even if Kihro and you would break up tomorrow, you and Shesly would stay friends and to see her with your friends who were helping her put on makeup and curl her hair and dress up and be one of the girls warmed your heart and your other orc girl friends from the other school districts also were here among your halfling friends and elven friends too and it made you so happy that they weren’t all grouped off, instead everyone was peacefully chatty and mixed. 

Gavin was of course in his room playing video games with his friends, also brothers of your friends while your dad and your uncle were inside cutting up whole beef loins to make steaks and your mom was having your cake delivered as your friends hung out and gossiped in your room and you didn’t bother paying attention when you heard grunting outside your bedroom window as Kihro and his friends carried a big package around the house, under your window and you didn’t hear Kihro direct them and you definitely didn’t hear how he then came inside just as your dad left the house out the back door before Kihro asked where your dad was before he went through the house, said hi to your mom and gave her a quick hug before he went into the back yard where he found your dad firing up the grill and pulled your dad aside and talk with him privately away from everyone else as Kihro’s friends made themselves useful to help carry out the heavier dishes from the kitchen before they helped themselves to the snacks that were being set out before your cake arrived. 

Your parents had gone all out for this party. Mostly because they almost lost you last year to your illness because you had spent your 17th birthday in the hospital barely hanging on by a thread and your parents felt they owed you a proper blow out this year and when you had mentioned a few things you had wanted- neither of them would tell you no. Your invitations for this party had been on par with many of the nicer wedding invitations and the DJ had set up in the garage and hung up a disco ball, laser lights and black lights and smoke machines and all kinds of stuff. 

Your parents even had ordered a tiered cake and hundreds of cupcakes from your favorite bakery- Boonzaaijer’s- in your favorite flavors that had been custom created for you in addition to a baker’s dozen cheesecakes from the Cheesecake Factory and a chocolate fountain with the works. The cake itself was gorgeous. The top tier was a lemon creme cake with limoncello and sugared lemon zest in the cake batter, with ripe strawberries soaked in super sweet pink moscato in the middle layer between the two cakes with a strawberry puree and the frosting was a twist on strawberry lemonade and the cupcakes in this flavor had the moscato soaked strawberries in the puree in the middle and chocolate dipped strawberries gracing the top of the frosting on top. The second tier was white chocolate cake with luscious whole raspberries in a raspberry puree in the middle layer made with raspberry peach Grand Marinier and the frosting was a ruby chocolate frosting and the cupcakes for this flavor had chocolate cups stuffed full and piled high with perfectly ripe raspberries drizzled in a glaze made out of simple syrup and that raspberry peach Grand Marinier. The third layer was a twist on pineapple upside down cake, it was still a pineapple upside down cake but with peaches and soaked in a trio of rums and peach schnapps and the cupcakes for these were little cupcake versions of a pineapple upside down cake with peaches cooked in the rums in the middle. The fourth tier was a “mudslide” chocolate cake that not only had Kahlua and Godiva and Baileys in the cake but also in the frosting. It was hands down the most decadent cake you had ever witnessed in your life and Kihro and yourself were pretty sure your wedding cake was going to be exactly like this. (If he ever proposed that is, but first he needed to get a damn place of his own because your father forbade any engagement if he didn’t have a home to bring you to that was not his parents house or your parents house, much like his rule that you couldn’t go out on any dates in a car that wasn’t mechanically sound and completely paid for which wasn’t a problem because Kihro’s truck had been bought used and he had paid cash for it so it was a “hoop” that Kihro easily jumped through and one that all your dad’s siblings and friends thought was genius to implement much to the chargrin of your cousins and friends.)

Your father had also had the same BBQ joint that he used to cater the employee picnics bring in a few roasted pigs and tons of ribs and brisket too while one of your uncles- Gary- fried up a ton of chicken wings while your other uncle- Larry- who was a butcher- had gotten several whole beef loins at his cost and “gifted” those to the party and your dad and your uncle were grilling those themselves as your uncle Larry manned the grill but kept an ear open to try to overhear what Kihro was talking to your dad about in the backyard away from everyone but judging from your dad’s posture and his beaming proud smile as he looked at things on Kihro’s phone and listened attentively as Kihro was talking and gesturing with his hands, it was obviously going well and when the two hugged each other, he knew something was going on but kept that to himself as your other uncles and aunts and cousins came over as the men started to congregate around the grill and BBQ pits before a few curious ones decided to see what your dad and Kihro were talking about but Kihro quickly put his phone away as the others came over as your dad simply dismissed it as it was a “work thing”. 

Just then the kegs got delivered. While you weren’t wild about beer, you asked for Kihro’s favorites so that he and the other adults would enjoy them as your father and all your uncles, both by blood and by “adoption” cracked into them, grunting growls- Home Improvement style echoing between all of them as they gleefully drank it down as the pit master let them have little bites of the roasting hogs and some ribs as they got the wings from the deep fryer as beers were drawn for everyone, even the DJ made an appearance to grab a beer and some wings and a few ribs as the Pit master and his crew gratefully took a few steins of beers themselves from the portable BBQ pits parked infront of the garage. 

“So how are things between you and Brie?” Your uncle Gary asked as Kihro took a wing from the pile. 

“Great.” Kihro answered as he slathered on Gary’s homemade hot sauce onto the wing as Gary looked from Kihro to your father as your father gave him a smile and a nod and that seemed to be enough for Gary. 

“Have you found a place of your own yet?” Your uncle Larry chimed in from his spot by the grill nearby as he gave Kihro a speculative glance before he gave your dad a curious look. 

“Possibly, just have to run the potential places by Brie to see what she thinks.” Kihro answered as he barely managed to keep the truth to himself by putting the wing in his mouth. 

“Great answer.” Your father praised as he pat Kihro on the back as the rest of your uncles looked at each other curiously knowing that you were one of his favorite daughters and your father was never more protective of any of his kids than he was of you so for your dad to be so pleasant, let alone approving of your boyfriend, was a good sign that Kihro was a good and trustworthy guy. 

“Well if you know of any good places, feel free to share with Max, I need to get him out of the damn house.” Your other uncle Robert instigated as Max just frowned at his dad as Kihro fought not to snort a laugh because the hot sauce up the nose was a bad idea. 

“Same could be said about you Casey.” Carl added as Casey rolled his eyes as he sucked down chicken wings himself. 

Truth be told, your father and all your uncles and your father’s friends were so proud to see Kihro try so hard and jump through so many hoops to court you properly and it gave them inspiration to push their own sons to match the same bar Kihro was making as well as urge their own daughter’s to expect more from their own significant others. 

Then Kidron and Rhiox showed up with the rest of their kids along with the rest of your father’s OG’s, having dropped off their own gifts on the tables as Kidron made a B-Line for your dad and the hot wings as Kihro’s friends finally rallied around Kihro and the wings in the backyard before your friend Tysh noticed her own crush among Kihro’s friends from her spot overseeing the backyard. 

“Oh, Kihro and his friends are here.” She announced before you nearly yanked your hair out trying to get the damn curling iron out of your hair before Melody made you sit back down so she could finish the back of your head. 

“Oh you can wait five more minutes, I have three curls left.” She reminded you. 

“What do you think Kihro got you?” Tysh asked. 

“An apartment for himself would be ideal. Because the only two things keeping me from actually being engaged to him were I was 1. Underage, which starting today- I no longer am and 2. Him having a home to bring me to if we did get engaged and then married.” You answered. 

“He’s had six months, why hasn’t he gotten one yet?” Sasha asked. 

“He can’t find a place he likes. He nitpicks every place. ‘Not a safe area’, ‘it’s too small’, ‘it’s too expensive’, ‘no garage to park the work truck’, ‘the apartment has issues’. You name it. There was even one apartment, it was a freaking duplex and it was perfect but no- he had a really bad feeling about the guy we would be renting from. Which actually worked out because two months later- the house itself sold and the current tenants were kicked out into the street without warning and their deposit was never returned to them. So there’s that.” You explained with a heavy sigh. 

“Borug just got a condo.” Korryn bragged from her spot on the other side of the room, taking snaps on her phone to send them to her current squeeze- Borug which you were sure once his money ran out, she’d be dropping him like a hot rock. Korryn was Grace’s friend and she was a year older than Grace but a year younger than you and Korryn wanted to be close to the center of attention wherever she went and for Grace’s sake, you put up with her at your party. Because honestly- you couldn’t stand her. But you supposed you could be gracious on your birthday. 

“I thought Borug didn’t have any money left after getting his car.” You questioned innocently, knowing Borug had to beg for a downpayment on his favorite car and a raise from his dad so he could afford the payments because he didn’t have the money saved because he had blown it in Vegas the month before clubbing with Korryn who had invited herself to some tech expo his dad’s company was attending and if you were a betting woman, Borug also got his parents to buy him a condo too because the shame of having a peer, that peer being Kihro, be farther in life than him- was too much for Borug to bear. 

Borug was very competitive and had a huge chip on his shoulder and was incredibly entitiled and an ego that you were positive your house was too small to contain it. But he hadn’t always been like that, as a kid he was awkward just like you. And in the classes that you didn’t share with Kihro, you had shared with Borug. He was also quite popular in school, part of the preppy jock group because he played sports too. But he was always nice and friendly to you at least. 

Borug was the eldest son of a man who owned one of the biggest tech companies in the Great Lakes and was always at the home shows for their tech and home security systems and his dad was part of the Business Owners Association, which your dad was also a part of and you had grown up seeing him a lot at the home shows and Association meetings that you had made snacks for that he helped you with when you were younger but once he was ‘old enough’ to be in the meetings himself with his dad, that stopped. 

Almost immediately after Kihro asked you out, Borug asked Korryn out, Korryn had a huge bosom, like each boob was the size of a basketball kind of big bosomed and she had a belly which for orcs, they usually loved fuller figured women so that wasn’t surprising but she had no ass and a richer yet smaller family who lived on Laken Lake which was a lake known for its lavish lake houses, speed boats and water sports while your family lived off of one of the Trinity Lakes that all connected together to form a three lobed lake, which were better for fishing and your family were avid fishers, a pastime you and Kihro enjoyed a lot together. Especially when he would help clean the catch and had a way of frying the fish that was amazing. 

However, something that you didn’t know was once Kihro had asked you out, he literally passed Borug who was also on his way to ask you out, he had even strutted accross the lunchroom but neither you or Kihro had noticed. When Borug had been passed by Kihro and saw Kihro sit at your table, he sat down at the next table over and eavesdropped and once Kihro asked you out to the dance and you accepted and especially once you kissed Kihro, he knew he didn’t stand a chance right then and so he had asked Korryn out to the dance after school since she had a different lunch time. 

It was only supposed to be until Kihro crashed and burned and Borug was supposed to come in and scoop you up and save the day and she was, according to a mutual friend, was just a right now girl. But Korryn hadn’t been happy with that and had insisted that they be an item since Borug’s plan was to treat Korryn the way he wanted to treat you, which ended up being an invitation to a super fancy restaurant that he was sure Kihro would have a hard time paying for and of course lavish Korryn with a gown and the “star treatment” which she had no problems taking absolute advantage of. But the problem was- was you had gotten another flair and hadn’t gone to the fall formal because you were in the hospital so you didn’t witness any of that except through Korryn’s social network feed on Grace’s phone because you weren’t friends with her on any social media which you could care less about. 

And of course by winter formal Korryn’s claws and hooks were fully embedded into Borug as she pushed them to be this picture perfect couple and Borug could only wait until Kihro would fail to jump through a hoop but every one Kihro jumped through with ease and to see you and Kihro be together so naturally and effortlessly and especially so happily, made his gut sour because while him and Korryn looked great on camera, the moments between the camera flashes were awful. Between her difficult and demanding personality, emotional immaturity, nonexistent life skills and zero work ethic coupled with piss poor money management along with her inability to compromise because she had been catered to by her parents and her other friends her whole life- the relationship was incredibly strained. He was stuck with a girl who pushed him to spend all his money on a “lifestyle” and expensive lavish gifts on her and it was something he couldn’t hope to support long term. And the barely mediocre sex he got from her wasn’t worth it but with her being the popular girl, no other girl would go near him for fear of Korryn’s retaliation socially. He literally got a big pair of tits. That was the only positive in that relationship for him. And Korryn was constantly spewing his personal business and every argument he ever got into with her, she told EVERYONE so that she could get “everyone” on her side. 

Meanwhile you had taken her behavior as notes about how not to act as Kihro was eternally grateful for it and every time Borug would complain to their mutual friends, Kihro would simply sit back and smirk that at least his girl didn’t do that shit and if anything, it gave Kihro the assurance that he had made the right decision by asking you out and doing everything in his power to keep you happy and content, if not sated the best ways he could, basically through his mouth and his hands because regular sex wasn’t allowed. Yet anyway. 

While you were open to a degree to your parents about the relationship because you had witnessed how your friends had kept some dangerous secrets from their parents and how that had not ended well at all, so much so that you kept your parents in the loop and were honest with them, so much so that they trusted you more and gave you freedoms that your friends couldn’t even dream of, freedoms that you wisely did not abuse. 

At the same time, you were also very discrete to everyone else- so that on the rare occasion where you two argued, he made sure to never escalate anything so that the two of you could talk it out and come to either an agreement or a compromise and no one ever heard anything about it, to the point that no one knew you had the disagreement in the first place except or your parents when you had simply mentioned it after the fact which impressed your parents and his. You urged him to stick to his budget and not splurge on anything but that if he needed to buy anything, to invest in quality and only buy something once and were just in general, a sweet, supportive girlfriend while he did his best to be as helpful, supportive, gentle and affectionate as he could be. You two got along like you had been together for years and asking you to a dance and dating you had been the best decision of Kihro’s life as well as yours. He had already spent his fair share of sleepless nights in the ER with you because it was important to him and to your parents to really see you at your worst physically and you wanted him to go into a relationship with you with his own eyes wide open.  

By now though, he had gotten you over a dozen beads that you were sure would pull your hair out if you tried wearing them all at the same time but instead you got them on a necklace that you never took off and that you guarded with your life, except for the gold promise ring/ engagement bead, that never left your hair. 

Once your hair was done you practically bolted out of your room to go downstairs to see Kihro, leaving your friends laughing as they followed you downstairs as they watched you having to hug your way through everyone who wanted to wish you a happy birthday and congratulations before you finally managed to get outside before you were swarmed by all your uncles and cousins before you finally got to your dad then Kihro before you glued yourself to his side. 

“So? How’s the beer?” You asked Kihro giddily. Hoping that he got to get his favorite at least. 

“Delicious.” Kihro praised as he offered you the cup to sip it, which you did, a tiny one. It was dark and intense but for the beer connoisseurs, very good because it was a Dragon’s Milk in a seasonal marshmallow and dark chocolate flavor. 

“It’s definitely beer.” You giggled as you handed it back and shuddered before you comically looked down your shirt. 

“Ok, so it isn’t replacing my boobs with chest hair immediately, that’s good.” You teased which got everyone to bust out laughing as Kihro nearly spit out his beer laughing himself. 

“Would you still love me with chest hair Babe?” You teased Kihro who comically grimaced. 

“Sure.” Kihro sarcastically agreed as he pretended to dodge the question and drink more beer which made you laugh as you noticed Tysh give her crush Akhi a beer and judging by the hopeful smile she gave him, she was trying to catch his eye, and judging by the way he bashfully took it from her, he liked her too but you knew Akhi was more shy than Kihro ever was and Tysh was one of your prettier friends before you noticed Korryn zero in on Borug and practically plastered herself on him and kissed him, which was a sloppy open mouthed kiss and you noticed how Borug actually sagged his shoulders in defeat and winced at being yanked down to her level as she pulled his hands to hold her before you looked back at Kihro and lowkey pretended to gag as Kihro watched Borug with amused pity before he turned to you and nearly spit out his beer again snickering a laugh at your reaction like it was the greatest inside joke as he rubbed soothing circles into your back and was grateful your arm was looped around his lower back before he sweetly kissed the crown of your head which made your dad grin at your discrete PDA as Borug’s dad gave Korryn the side eye because he didn’t approve of Korryn at all. He knew a gold digger when he saw one and felt his son could do so much better and was almost to the point of bribing his son to dump her for good because the two fought almost all the time. 

“So how’s massage school?” Borug’s dad Draig asked you. 

“Going great. Getting A’s.” You beamed. 

“Getting proposed to every time she’s in the clinic.” Your dad revealed. 

“Oh really?” Draig blinked but grinned. 

“They’re not serious proposals, they’re all joking.” You clarified.

“But you have to be pretty good if they’re offering, all joking aside.” Draig countered. 

 “Ok so I’m known as Big Touch. Because I have little hands but a big touch because I’m heavy handed and they expect the other orc girls who are strong enough to deliver that kind of touch but so far they’re softer handed than I am. So when the clients ask for deep tissue and firm pressure, they expect one of the other girls to come out to meet them and when they see me they always laugh, not believing I’m Big Touch. But about five minutes into the session they find out real quick I’m the real deal, and about 10 minutes in they drop the “tough guy act” and ask me to ease up and by the end of the session they’re believers and try to get rebooked with me. And as it stands I’m booked out until August and I should have all my clinic hours in by then.” You explained. 

“And he’s cool with you working on other guys?” Draig questioned you with a look at Kihro who simply grinned proudly. 

“Yeah, of course, because she’s a professional and if they can’t respect her and the profession they have no business being her clients and she doesn’t need their business if they step out of line and she has no qualms about dismissing anyone. She already has five job offers and her clientele list that is following her from the clinic to wherever she decides to go is already several pages long. She doesn’t need my ego or my possessive jealousy holding her back from making bank because she can stand to make just as much as I do if not more which I don’t have any problem with at all. It would be like her being so jealous she won’t let me do my job when there’s only a married housewife at home without her husband right?” Kirho defended as your love for him was oozing out of every pore on your body as you beamed a bright happy and appreciative smile at Kihro while your dad, all your ungles and Kidron beamed happily themselves while Draig couldn’t argue with that while Borug outright pouted. Because while he wasn’t wild about Korryn, he totally was jealous of every guy who commented on her instagram pictures complimenting her massive cleavage but wanted to get into fights with everyone who called her “butterface” which you thought was hilarious. 

“So Korryn told me that you got a new condo is that right Borug?” You asked Borug, shifting the attention over to him as you looked from him to Draig who’s shoulders dropped. 

“Yup, it’s at The Glen. Just signed the papers yesterday.” Borug boasted. The Glen was a brand new condo complex that was about 20 minutes away and many of the young people who’s parent’s lived on Laken Lake were snatching up condos there like crazy. 

“So that means we need to go furniture shopping Baby.” Korryn cooed excitedly and you had never seen Borug force a smile so hard before. You actually felt sorry for him. But it wasn’t your business or a problem you should ever try to fix. You could only stand back and watch to see what happened and hoped that they both wouldn’t fight during your party. 

“And how much did that cost you?” Your dad murmured to Draig. 

“Too much.” Draig muttered back. 

“What about you Kihro? Haven’t you been apartment shopping for like half a year?” Borug jabbed. 

“I have, haven’t found the right place yet.” Kihro just shook his head no with a smug smirk because he overheard your dad from his spot. 

“Cause you’re too picky?” Korryn snidely instigated with a smile that you wanted to slap off her face. 

“Well being “picky” can be a good thing. Brie needs special accommodations because with her business, some of her clients are going to be using walkers and wheelchairs and they can’t do stairs and even if she works for another outfit, I’m sure she’ll still do her own thing on the side and I have to be mindful of that. Plus I need a place close to the hospital because of her health and I need a place to accommodate her pets and mine.” Kihro just started to list off as your mom came out to let everyone know that things were ready for the party to go into full swing. 

“Aww, well that’s because you’re so sweet and thoughtful Kihro.” Your mother praised which got a grateful smile from Kihro and you. 

“Party’s ready when you are Brie.” Your mother informed you. 

“Sweet, how are the hogs Mr. Terry?” You asked the pit master from his spot in front of the portable pits. 

“Been ready Sweetie.” He called back. 

“Well then lets do this.” You instigated before the party got into full swing and you pigged out on all the food and got to dance, Kihro never leaving your side for a moment before you were urged to open your gifts and of course you not only had your little sisters to help while Grace was your recorder and even had Kihro’s little siblings help you which Kihro loved and adored that you made an effort to include them and were sweet and nice to them. 

You got all kinds of massage tools and your aunts Sally and Marry, (married to Larry and Gary respectively) hand made you flaxseed pillows to use in your practice and had gone to the fabric store to pick out all this pure cotton fabric in all these patterns they knew you would like and together they got their sewing machines out and had sewn you over a dozen of them in all these different sizes and a few different styles and you nearly cried because you knew this was a labor of love. 

Your parents of course had gotten you your ideal massage table and a new car, which meant your current one got to be a hand me down to Grace as an early sweet 16 which she was thrilled with while Draig and his family had gotten you the best massage table on the market along with a damn tool box with all kinds of massage tools, the table itself was fully electric and had all kinds of extra bells and whistles and it made your jaw drop, it had taken Borug, Draig, Kihro and all of Kihro’s friends to carry it since it was very heavy. You got all kinds of gifts from everyone while your sisters and Kihro’s younger siblings had all gotten orders from Kihro and your parents to make sure you opened Kihro’s gifts last and when it came to the last few gifts, the first gift from Kihro was a small box and in the box was a coconut half. 

“What is that? Half a coconut bra?” Korryn sneered. 

“You would need four of those.” Borug laughed as he made to grab her boob but she shifted away so he couldn’t. “Tease.” Borug teased with his nose in her ear, making her shudder and turn back to him. 

But instead you looked at it and immediately knew what it was. 

“Oh no way, you didn’t.” You started laughing at Kihro who was sitting down front and center as you looked it over. 

“What is it?” Your mom asked. 

“It’s a coconut hide for a reptile mom.” You informed her. 

“Ew!” Korryn complained before you handed a second box. And once you took the paper off, it was a reptile shipping box which made you squeal in excitement before you got your pocket knife out and opened it as your brother Gavin was instantly much more interested as he scooted his chair really close to you. 

“Oh you got Gavin’s attention really fast.” Your dad laughed as you had Gavin sit right next to you. 

“What do you think it is?” You asked Gavin.  

“It better be either a snake or a gecko.” Gavin insisted because he thought reptiles were awesome and already had a bearded dragon himself and it was something he and Kihro’s younger brother Mohre bonded over. 

“Oh my gods, oh my gods, oh my gods.” You started to chatter excitedly as you opened the box and found a few bags before you opened up the first bag and peeked inside. 

“It’s a snake!” Gavin cheered before you let him peek into the bag too. 

“What kind is it?” Gavin wondered before you pulled it out before you looked in the box to see the different snake cards. 

“That, is an ivory leopard?” You guessed at Kihro who nodded to confirm. 

“Sweet.” Gavin beamed.

“Aren’t you just gorgeous!” You cooed to the snake. 

“What else did he get you?” He asked as he eagerly. “I’ll hold that, you need two hands to open the others.” He insisted as he held out his hands to take it from you before you handed it over before you looked in the other bags. 

“Oooh, this must be the pastel super coral glow, hello sweetie.” You cooed as you got the snake out of the bag before you passed it over to Gavin who held the other snake in his hand before you got to the last one. 

“And this is a crystal ball!” You cheered when you got them out. 

“Thank you Babe, I love them. Now I just gotta get some tubs or something.” You realized before looking back over at the giant box left by the gift table before you looked at the smug grin on Kihro’s face. 

“You got me a rack system didn’t you.” You playfully accused Kihro before you wrapped the crystal ball around your neck to hang out as you opened up the box and found it was indeed a rack system. 

“Thank you so much Baby.” You cooed to him as you came over and kissed him, the crystal ball sticking it’s head out to sniff Kihro. 

“You’re welcome.” Kihro cooed back. 

“What are you gonna name them?” Your sister Ari asked as she got the super coral glow from Gavin. 

“I don’t know, I’ll take suggestions.” You answered before your sisters went to the office and got a pad of paper and decided to take a poll to what to call the snakes into a basket. 

“How about we go set this up so these precious babies can rest.” You urged Kihro before he and his friends got up and picked up the box and the other gifts and carried them up the stairs while everyone went back to party and you simply sat on the bed with your brother and your little sister, each of you holding a snake as you watched proudly as Kihro and his friends got to work setting up the rack system and getting everything ready and to you in that moment, Kihro couldn’t get any sexier. 

You knew he wasn’t perfect but the gods be damned you couldn’t see any flaws at this moment. Here he was sitting down on the floor, reading the manual and putting it together accordingly and a screw driver in his hand and he might as well have been naked with a dozen roses posing on a bed because you could feel the wetness squish between your legs. You wanted to fuck his brains out is what you wanted to do. But you had to admit that what you wanted more than snakes for your birthday was his own independence but it had not been the time or the place earlier to ask him about it. You waited patiently as Kihro put it together and all his friends made sure each tub was ready to go before you put the snakes away in their new homes. 

“Guys, could you give us a moment please?” You requested to his friends once they were done before everyone else left as the snakes settled into their new homes.  

“What’s wrong?” Kihro asked as he read your face and body language. 

“I don’t want to be ungrateful or anything. But I would have been happier if you had used all the money that you spent on all this getting an apartment.” You answered before you peeked up at him and saw him beam another proud smile at you. 

“Brie, why do you think I got a rack system capable of housing 12 to 40 snakes when you only have three and I only have three?” He questioned. 

“Because ball pythons can become an addictive hobby?” You guessed. 

“That’s true but, because I knew that if I got you this, it would give me a moment to privately give you these.” He said as he reached into his pocket and gave you two business cards. 

One was a bank manager’s business card with an appointment time written on it for Monday and the second was a realtor’s business card. 

“What?” You breathed as you looked at the two as you realized what the implications of these were. “Wait, are you getting preapproved for a home loan?” You asked as your heart started to race. 

“We are.” Kihro corrected. 

“We?” You repeated as a bright smile soon bloomed on your face before you squealed and leaped into his arms and was happy when he caught you and held you up so you could kiss him. 

“Why didn’t you give me these as my present?!” You asked. 

“I didn’t want to embarrass you, just in case, I know we both like to keep our private affairs private.” Kihro answered. 

“Well with the present company, that would probably be wise.” You laughed with a pointed look at Korryn’s things she had left in your room. “That was very kind and thoughtful of you. Thank you.” You thanked him. 

“And I don’t think the bank will approve it if you don’t have this.” He said as he carried you over to your chair and sat down with you still in his arms before he dug into his pocket and pulled out an engagement ring, a mermaid sapphire one and you were instantly crying tears of happiness as he put it on before he produced another gold bead for your hair, a larger one but the same style as the first as you sat there and happily waited for him to add it to the other in your hair. 

“How do I look?” You asked when he was finished as wiped at the streaking mascara under your eyes but your smile shamed the sun. 

“Beautiful.” He whispered before he framed your face and kissed you earnestly and you melted in his lap and returned the impassioned kiss. 

“Pack a bag, I’m taking you on a trip this weekend, after the party.” He urged. 

“What?” You laughed in surprise. 

“Before we actually tie the knot and get married, I want to make sure I can fit in my bride.” Kihro explained as he palmed your belly but reached under you to sensually rub at your center. 

“Uh, I don’t know if..” You began to counter as your cheeks flushed even though in that moment you didn’t want anything more. 

“Your dad already gave me the go ahead, no more chaperones, no more hoops, we can just be together and the only clause was that I didn’t knock you up, so as long as we can be safe about it, we don’t have to hold back anymore.” Kihro explained as you were ready start immediately. But instead you kissed him before you practically leaped off of him to grab a bag and started stuffing enough clothes to get you through the weekend and an outfit for the appointment on Monday, you wanted to look as professional and mature as possible. 

“Ok, let’s send everyone home, I’m ready to go.” You insisted which made him laugh. 

“Easy horndog. The night is still young, we have plenty of time, we’re not going that far.” He assured you.

“But I am going to put this in the truck.” He explained as he took his bag and you left your room with your hand still intertwined with his before your mother was already at the base of the stairs which prompted Kihro to leave your bag at the top of the stairs because he could sense you were about to be swarmed. 

“And?” She asked excitedly since your dad had clued her in before Kihro brought your intertwined hands up to show off the engagement ring before she squealed and as soon as the people around saw the ring, word spread like wildfire though the party and Korryn turned a few shades greener as she looked at your engagement ring before she looked expectantly at Borug as if he had been secretly keeping one for her in his pocket and you were too happy to recieve congratulations from everyone else to notice how Draig gave Borug a warning glare with a pointed look in Korryn’s direction but Kihro caught it as did everyone else apparently as your dad nearly died laughing but happily hugged you tight. 

“You sure it’s ok?” You whispered in his ear.

“Yup, as long as this is what you want, I’ll support you no matter what.” Your dad reassured you before he kissed your cheek affectionately. 

“Thank you, I love you so much Dad.” You told him before you let go and received all the other congratulations from everyone else and if you had thought the party was in full swing before, now it really was. You danced until you felt your feet were going to fall off, you ate until you were stuffed and drank until you were just a little tipsy but so happy and at peace. 

And once most of the party guests finally left, you left too with Kihro. Granted his truck wasn’t nearly as nice as Borug’s sports car. It was still all Kihro’s and you didn’t worry about a thing as you sat next to him and held his hand when he wasn’t shifting gears. You didn’t care where you were going, he could drive on for forever. He drove until he came to a beach house in South Haven which was only half an hour away. 

“What is this place?” You asked curiously as you got out of the truck and looked up at it. 

“An airbnb.” He beamed as he got your bags and his and entered the code on the door to be let in. He had actually spent his morning getting this place ready because he was hopeful that your dad would say yes and he had packed the fridge with enough food to get you through the weekend and your parents had packed you enough leftovers to also get you through too. 

“Home away from home for the weekend.” He said as he managed to pick you up and carry you over the threshold which cracked you up. 

“How in the world were you able to afford all of this?” You wondered as he put you down and the bags down on the other side.  

“Well actually Borug and I had the same amount in savings when we both asked out our girls and so far in the six months he’s dated Korryn, she’s bled him dry while my savings has done nothing but go up even though I’ve been beading you well and the snake thing was something I was going to do either way and since you love it as much as I do- I might as well make it a couple thing, something we can do and enjoy together. Plus even when your health is bad and you can’t physically manage to give massages, this can be a backup for us.” He explained. 

“And even if we don’t make any money with the snakes. They’re still pets to add to our menagerie because honestly, finding an apartment that checks all the boxes we need it to is slim. But a house- we’ll get much farther with a house and the market is pretty big and open right now.” He explained. “Besides if I had gotten an apartment right when we got together, I would be six months of rent poorer and while the house we could get won’t be as nice as a condo…” Kihro began. 

“Oh my gods, I can not begin to tell you how much I don’t want a condo just on the off chance that Borug and Korryn would feel entitled to come over since they’re “neighbors”. No, hell no.” You interrupted him which got him to bust out laughing. 

“Ok, we’re in agreement on that.” He beamed. 

“Let’s get something we can both manage but we can make it our own. It doesn’t have to be brand new, we don’t even have to get something custom, not now, not ever because we had enough headaches with our current house as it is. It would be nice to get something just semi nice- functional, something that we don’t have to bulldoze and start from scratch, but not a money pit either. But something with space, obviously a garage for the work truck and a yard big enough for Kelly that is either fenced in or we can fence it in and we can make it ours over time, it doesn’t have to be picture perfect for me to move in, I can work with anything. And if we’re doing this together, let’s do this together all the way, I absolutely insist on adding my savings to yours for this and all the money I just got from graduation which I know you took all of yours and added it to your savings. I just had the birthday party to end all birthday parties and a graduation party to end all others and we don’t need a wedding to end all weddings ok? No need to go into unnecessary debt, let’s just get preapproved for a home loan and small equity loan for some modest home improvements that we can do ourselves over time so we can turn whatever house we choose into our home.” You urged him and noticed he nodded along with everything you said so you could tell you were both on the same page. 

“So suburbs.” Kihro gathered. 

“Yeah basically.” You nodded. 

“Awesome, I’m happy we’re in agreement about this because everything you just said is what I was thinking and planning anyway. So, want to get naked?” He asked which made you laugh. 

“Hell yeah! I’d thought you would never ask Baby.” You giggled before he picked you back up and put you over his shoulder and grabbed your bags and started going up the stairs as you cackled from your place over his shoulder. 

“Woo! Conquer me Baby!” You cheered which made him laugh before he playfully bit your ass with a flirtatious growl which made you squeal even more before he got to the bedroom and let you drop onto the bed before you bounced, laughing so hard your ribs hurt. 

But your laughing died down to giggles as you sat up and watched Kihro strip his shirt off before he stalked up the bed towards you, your legs were already splayed for him, your wetness soaking through your shorts so there was a wet spot over your core and when he got on all fours over you- you greedily pulled him to you to kiss your nerves away as his weight settled over you as you let that comfort you. The feel of his surprisingly soft but supremely warm skin over his hard, sculpted body was lighting you up just as much as his hands stroking your soft sides from lifting your shirt. His hands, although rougher from callouses from years of hard work, yet there was a supreme gentle reverence in his touch. Like you were a precious gem he was caressing. Like you were his greatest treasure. You couldn’t feel any safer or more comfortable than in his embrace. 

Yet you were so relieved when Kihro slowed down and just laid over you and kissed you until all the tension in your body melted away and when Kihro started kissing your neck and chest, you were itching to get out of your clothes and feel all of his skin against all of yours as you started tugging on your shorts to get them off and that seemed to be what Kihro was looking for before he lifted himself up on his elbows to give you room to remove them and your underwear as he took that cue to take his own pants off and you could only giggle like a loon to see his cock straining in his boxers as you palmed it and started stroking it as you started to lavish open mouthed kisses to his chest and neck as his touch got a little firmer and deliciously needy before he helped you out of your bra. 

“There’s my friends.” Kihro practically giggled once your boobs were free from their constraints before he grabbed them and started kneading them before he started sucking on them as you threaded your fingers through his hair and pulled him closer before he moved one hand to your center and delved in which made you moan and throw your head back. 

Before this was as far as you could go. But now, instead of only getting your feet wet as the waves caressed them and staring at the water, now you could jump right in. You eagerly pulled the covers down and moved the two of you to between the covers before you greedily got him over you and between your legs and it took a little bit of work getting the head in because it was softer and squishier than the rest of the shaft and once it was in you both blew out a shaky breath of relief which got you both to laugh a little breathlessly and with a good and gentle push, your maidenhood gave way but he was in, it was a tight fit, but he fit and you felt your prayers and his were answered and Kihro made sure you were as comfortable as possible for every bit of it and made sure you were ok and made sure that you wanted this and was ready to pull out, literally- at any moment. But you stuck your heels behind his legs and locked him in because you didn’t want him going anywhere but farther in. 

“We made it this far, come on Baby, take me all the way home.” You insisted before he looked at you so softly. 

“I’m already home with you.” He murmured as he pressed his forehead to yours. 

“Me too.” You whispered as you shared a breath with him as he started to ease in and out as the pain lessoned and morphed into pleasure and the more relaxed and turned on you got the more your canal opened up and the easier it was but at the same time you could tell Kihro was officially on a slippery slope because while you could tell he was bound and determined to get you to cum before he did but you could tell he was fighting his own release as if it was a mighty foe. 

“Baby, get a condom on before you lose your load.” You urged. 

“No, I can...I can last.” He tried to insist as he rested his head on the pillow next to your head as you kegalled and constricted around him as you grinded against him with a meaningful look that said ‘Are you sure about that?’

“Oh fuck, yeah, ok, ok, ok.” Kihro caved as he pulled out and rolled over so he could get into the drawer where he stashed a box of condoms and he had spent last night trying to find the ones that would fit him best and once he was protected you got on and started to ride him and he just stared up at you in awe wonder. 

“You are the greatest vision my eyes will ever see.” Kihro professed and your heart melted. 

“Aww, likewise, I can’t wait to live the rest of my life with you and I don’t care where we live or what we do as long as we’re together doing it.” You mirrored as a few happy tears came to your eyes. ���I’m just so happy that you’re mine.” You confessed before he sat up and cradled you in his arms. 

“I’m always going to be yours.” Kihro vowed. “Just like you are always going to be mine as long as you want to be.” Kihro added. 

“I wouldn’t worry about me ever changing my mind if I were you.” You reassured him. “You’re stuck with me.” You giggled. “As long as you want to be.” You added as you bit your lip. 

“I’ll always want to Baby,” he purred before he kissed you and nibbled on your lip because seeing you bite it only made him want to nibble on it himself which made you giggle. 

“You and your lip fetish.” You teased. 

“Not just any lips, your lips, all your lips.” He practically growled which made you squeal in delight as he hiked his hips up with more power that nearly knocked the air out of your lungs but made a moan spill from your kiss swollen lips. 

You let your instincts take control and before you knew it you were so close you recognized the home stretch and by now Kihro had flipped you over and was pounding into you as your body was tensing from the extreme pleasure Kihro was giving you and then with one last push, you were falling into bliss just as Kihro was stuffing that condom full as he slammed into you so deep you felt the head run into the top of your cervix as his fingers dug into the softness of his hips as his growling roar of completion was the most amazing sound and helped amplify your own orgasm. 

“Wow,” you breathed as you basked in the afterglow as Kihro rested over you and caught his breath. 

“Uh huh, wow, well worth the wait, damn baby, that was the best...just...the best...most amazing, you’re so amazing, holy shit that was mind blowing.” Kihro gushed as he cuddled with you and kissed you all over. “Thank you, thank you, thank you for the best sex of my life.” He thanked you which made you crack up. 

“Best sex of our lives so far.” You giggled because truth was Kihro was every bit of a virgin that you were. 

“That’s true.” Kihro conceded before he kissed you before he pulled away and a huge load of semen was ballooning out at the head which made you both giggle. 

“Been saving that for me huh?” You gently teased as he pulled away and very carefully took it off before he tied it off and threw it away and got cleaned up and got you cleaned up. 

“I’m sorry if I hurt you Babe,” he cooed as he helped clean you up. 

“That pleasure was definitely worth the little bit of pain and discomfort, it’s only going to get better from here.” You reassured him before you both got ready for bed and finally got a chance to sleep together in the purest sense. 

When you woke up, you had some amazing morning sex before you made breakfast together, being ever so grateful that Kihro could cook and not just cook but clean up after himself before you walked to the rest of the beach and just talked about everything under the sun and made all kinds of plans before you went back and decided to open all your cards that you had gotten that your parents had dumped into a bag for you as Kihro wrote down who gave what for the purpose of writing thank you cards as you counted up the money and gift cards and come Monday morning, you deposited all that you could and got a bank balance at your bank so that you could take that to Kihro’s bank and to your surprise, your parents and Kihro’s parents met you there for the purpose of co-signing, you knew that Kihro’s parents would co-sign but to have your parents also cosign meant a lot to you that they would give you this kind of support. 

Now the hard parts- finding a house and planning a wedding. 

[blurrymango]

Chapter One

The air was salty and chilled, a sign that it was finally the beginning of fall. PoisonBerry clutched the journey in bony hands. There was something strange about this day, something overwhelming that loomed over the vessel of the ship like a cloud. The net that had been cast in the water came back up slowly. The crew watched with anticipation as it breached the surface. What they had pulled up was not fish nor treasure, but a body. With long brown hair and scarring burns covering what surface wasn’t covered in decay. The raven-haired girl felt to her sick to her stomach at the scene before, the nauseating smell and sight quickly overtook her, her body unable to handle it as she passed out.

Maybe in another timeline he would have cared, but by the sticky-notes she had covered the pages of his book with, it was obvious she had no idea who he was, no respect for the grave in which his thoughts at. And in the pale moonlight that shined through the small window on the wall, he realized that, as well as having no respect for him, she had no respect for herself either. Greasy and unkept short black hair mocked anyone who knew her. She used to take pride in herself, inner and outer. Those once delicate and slender hands that could make or break beautiful creations were now callused and shaky. He looked away, not wanting to see her in that state any longer.

Whoever had shared this before had long since left, as he hoped he would as well. He would have thrown on whatever of the person’s clothes fit comfortably, though with his stature he was reduced to choosing whatever wouldn’t slide off his awkward body. He absentmindedly wondered how easily he would be able to get his muscle and fat back up, knowing that until his skin wasn’t trying to heal itself over layers of decay he wouldn’t be able go back on testosterone. He sneered at the thought, grabbing an empty satchel and putting his journal and some money in it.

He figured that if he were to stay on the ship that he would be interrogated or if he managed to play dead that the male members of the crew would likely try to, well, make use of his corpse’s more feminine parts. He shivered at the thought, unable to tell if he feared the idea or got excited by it. Either way he did not want to find out which. He briefly considered taking PoisonBerry with him, but not only did she not remember who he was but frankly she might as well be dead if she didn’t remember him. Plus, he was a stranger to her, and though she was never quite smart, she had good instincts. He had always admired that about her.

He was about to get into a raft when he heard a gun cock and felt cool metal against the back of his head. He could hear it now, the unsteady and ragged breath of the person behind him. She never really liked the sea air, her asthma would always act up, as it was now by how it sounded. He cleared his throat.

“Th-the-the o-o-cea-ocean a-ai-air-r a-ain’t g-goo- ain’t g-good f-for ya lungs-s, girl.” He hated his stutter, it made him sound scared, but, really, he wasn’t really feeling emotions right now. His legs were tired from standing, his tongue sandpaper in his mouth, and his entire body was sore and nauseated.

“‘S-s-sides, if y-y-ya k-killed me, I b-b-bet-betcha’ th-that ya c-capt-tin beat y-you f-f-for it, make ya c-clean up my bl-blood and gut-ts.” The coolness of the gun left, and he turned to face her. Her features were etched with anger and fear, though her long nose scrunched up with disgust. Maybe it was the smell. But when he looked into her eyes, she looked away. Those once bright green eyes that he had once stared into with mutual admiration and respect could now barely stand to look back at him. She was afraid.

“Just return what st-stole and you can leave.” She held out her hand for the item.

“Th-th-the b-bah-bag ain’t-t yours, b-b-babe.” He needed to get on land quickly, else he was going to throw up his guts into the sea.

“I’m talking about the journal.” She sneered at him. He could handle an angry PoisonBerry, and he knew had to act fast or do what she wants, or things would get violent.

“J-j-jus-jus’ t-t-takin’ back what’s-s m-mine br-bro.” His instincts acted and then the gun was in his hand and aimed straight at her head before she could register what happened.

“Y-y-y’know wh-what-t, s-s-s-since you s-so rude to your g-guest, you c-c-can t-take me to the Av-v-v-vante docks or y-you-you’ll get a f-fuck-fucking b-bull-let in ya s-sk-skull.” She was no longer rude.

It would have been silent if not for the gentle waves around them. Blitz was looking directly at PoisonBerry, studying the rowing girl with scrutinizing eyes. She used to be so different, she was so confident, hard-headed and energetic. She used to give off an air of easy-going superiority that made anyone relaxed. The person in front of him was merely a pitiful disgrace in her body, if there was a way to get rid of this thing that possessed her and bring back his friend, he would take any opportunity he got. He hated how different she was now, and it showed.

“So, uh-“

“Sh-sh-sut-shut the f-f-fuck up, p-pl-please. I-I-I’m n-not in the m-mood to t-t-talk.” The rest of the it was spent in grateful silence.

When the two arrived at the town, the sun had barely risen, yet society was already awake. The mere idea of waking up this early disgusted them both and angered Blitz, but that meant stores were open. Which meant food, and though the thought of eating nauseated him, he was hungry, and he knew just where to eat at.

He walked with a purpose, if anger could be considered one. It certainly would have been a sight to see, a corpse walking with a girl so skinny she was a skeleton, both wore ill-fitted clothing. Blitz loved and hated the stares he got, on one hand, it was attention and their gazes were fearful, on the other hand, it was attention, and they were afraid of him.

When the two reached their destination, a small café tucked neatly away in the city, Blitz was thankful that there weren’t much people. He gestured for PoisonBerry to sit at a booth near the counter. He knew the girl at the register, but something told him she didn’t remember him. Before he could order though, another familiar face rushed in, a vampire girl whose admittedly had much healthier looking skin than his, she ordered tea and coffee. He snorted at the order, knowing that it was not born of indecisiveness, but of an ideology that screamed ‘Life is boring so do what you want and if you end up buried alive or in jail then you did not party hard enough.’ Quite frankly a beautiful philosophy to live by.

“Y-you tr-tryna’ c-c-cure a h-hang-hangover?” He leaned against the counter. She looked over at him, shocked by his existence, and smirked, pulling out a thermos. She unscrewed the cap and held it towards him. The contents of which assaulted his sense of smell. The thermos contained a mix of honey, blood, and vodka.

“M-m-ay-maybe j-just stick to c-candles, A-Amber.” He told her.

“Either you’re a psychic or a stalker, either way I’m outta here.” She exclaimed, pronouncing ‘either’ both ways. True to her word, she gathered up her things and left. The girl behind the counter snorted.

“Next, I guess.” The dark-skinned girl said, a hint of amusement in her voice.

“U-uh, y-yeah, I-I’ll have a sl-slice of st-str-strawberry c-c-cake and a t-t-t-tea for my friend and I’ll have  a dou-double-ch-choc-double-chocolate-ch-chip cookie and uh, the sw-sweet-test coffee you have.”

The girl scribbled down the order with a bored expression, then her eyes flicked up and she smiled.

“That’ll be $14.42.” She stood straight and cleared her throat. “But if you can guess my name you’ll get a discount.” She smiled lazily. He might as well have, considering he knew, both her and her twin.

“I c-c-can tell y-ya more th-than th-th-that. A-al-also I’ll p-pay for the va-vampire’s drink t-too, consider-considering h-how sh-she l-left bef-fore she- before she could h-h-hers-self.”

She pretended to ponder it for a moment, then held out her hand for him to shake his. She slid the order through the little window leading to the kitchen.

“Y-your n-n-name i-is Ar-Arti-Artimes, you ha-have a twi-tw-twin with b-bl-blue e-eyes named Apollo, and-and! - y-y’all  are fr-friends and c-co-workers with girl n-named Ch-Char-Cha-Charlotte C-Cooke!” She stared at his grinning face with wide eyes.

“Go sit with your friend, your order will be out shortly.” He smiled at her, setting down $9 and going to sit with PoisonBerry.

“Wha-what are you, like, a stalker or somethin’?” She asked with bewilderment. All she got for a response was a small hum.

“Like, how do you know so much?” She rephrased. He leaned over the table at her and spoke in a low tone.

“I-I’m a g-god.” He leaned back up. “A-anyway, af-aft-ter this I f-figured we sh-should g-go v-v-visit an old f-f-friend.”

“Or maybe we should make you go get a haircut because it covers your face.” She said back. He let out a chuckle and a small glare.

A girl with skin the color of cookie dough and caramel-colored curly locks of hair walked over to them, carrying their breakfast. Charlotte Cooke, the love of his life from before death, still looked as angelic as ever. She nodded her head along with whatever was playing in her head-phones and smiled at him as she set down their food. He clumsily searched his bag for some money to tip her with.

“Well, thank you sir!” Her soft voice was music to him.

“H-h-have a n-nice d-day!” He said as walked away. The two ate in silence, PoisonBerry giving him weird looks the whole time. They finished up and left.

“Alright-t, s-s-so, I a-ain’t g-gon-na-na get my h-hair c-cut in p-p-public p-plac-ce.” He said to her as they walked down the gravel roads.

“What, so, you gonna cut it yourself?” She asked as they turned a corner. He didn’t respond, in fact, the walk continued in silence until they reached a point where gravel turned to dirt and buildings turned to trees.

“Where are you taking me?” Her curiosity was starting to turn into unease. She started wondering how much she could trust this guy. Minutes went by with no answer as Blitz lead her down a twisting path that lead to nowhere. She asked him again and he responded with aggression in his stance and an off-putting calmness in his words.

“Y-you cl-clearly aren’t c-c-com-comfortable ‘round me, y-yet you con-continue foll-follow what I s-say. I d-don’t need-need you at this point, a-at th-th-this-s pl-plac-ce.” He turned to face her, and even though his face was visible, it still just as unreadable. “Th-th-there is n-no more g-gun t-to your head-d,” he spread his arms out “and there is n-no g-g-gun in-in my h-h-hand. Ther-the-there’s n-n-noth-thing stop-stopping you fr-from-from leaving.” She looked away, hugging herself with boney arms.

“I got nothin’ to go back to if I leave.”

“D-damned if you d-do, damn-damned if you don’t. Y-you’ve go-got-t-ten this f-far, c-contin-continue, o-or not, it’s-s your ch-choice, I d-d-don’t ca-care.” He continued down the trail, and against her better judgement, she followed behind, like a dog on a leash.

The house was exactly as he remembered it. It towered over the trees and to those unfamiliar with it, they would lose more than just their path. He always loved this place, and it loves him. He could spend eternity wandering its’ halls. His house lifeless, like he had been. Yet there was someone in there. He barged in, ready to tear the place to shreds with his bare hands to find them, to find this intruder and remove them from his home like a parasite from a praying mantis. Yet there was no need to, the person was right there.

“Oh, I thought you’d be home sooner.” With pale, cubby cheeks, red eyes, and long straight blue hair, Sundae had not changed one bit. And judging by the barking corgi that squeezed through her legs to lick him, neither Sundae nor Butterscotch had forgotten him. He picked up the Brit and spun her around, the two laughing like children. Butterscotch yipped happily. He put her down, cleared his throat, and told her what he already knew.

“Blitz, trust me, I’ve been keeping tabs on our dear friends, and I know how to get their memories back. Except,” She gestured to a confused PoisonBerry, “she’s been at sea.” She walked over to the green-eyed girl and took her angular face between her hands. “Plus, she’s changed the most. Whatever made her how she was, was purely thanks to you. She’ll be the hardest to restore. But, we’ll also need her for Midnight.” She lead the two into the house.

“W-w-well, h-how we g-gonna do it?” He asked her, hands in his pockets. A thought struck him then. One that shook him to his core. Had his brother forgotten him? Did his sister forget him? His head was clouded, his ears rang, and nausea consumed him.

“Blitz!” Sundae caught him before he fell. She looked to PoisonBerry. “Well come on then, help me out here.” The raven-haired girl hurried to them.

“What’s wrong with him?” She asked frantically. Sundae simply looked at her. “Is-is he having a stroke?”

“What- No. He, he’ll be fine, he just passed out.”

Blitz woke up a day later. Nausea filled his head and couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, he was numb and in pain all at once. He tried to scream, yet all that came out was blood and bile. He managed to lean over when he threw up. He knew it might be getting on his carpet, but at the moment he didn’t care. After emptying the contents of his stomach and lungs, he regained his senses a bit. His head pounded, and his body felt like it was on fire. He stumbled out of bed, thankfully not stepping in vomit, and limped to the bathroom. He fumbled around the mirror cabinet until he found his meds. He swallowed them along a mouthful of sink water. The room smelled like death, he smelled like death. He tore off the stolen clothes, grimacing when pieces of flesh went with it. He noticed now how his hair was in such a bad state. The brown locks were greasy, tangled, and covered his face. His skin, normally just pale and scarred, was covered patched of green and yellow rot.  He stumbled to his bathtub, turning the faucet on scorching hot and dumping an entire bottle of soap in it. He got in and dunked his head under, too. He felt his hand around the floor and found scissors and a comb. With shaky hand he began to cut and comb his hair. By this point the tub was beginning to overflow, but he didn’t care because there was a drain beneath it. Then he bathed himself. He scrubbed until the blistered. He didn’t want to leave this heavenly scorching heat, but the feeling of unease made him leave.  He turned the water off, unplugged the drain and went to the mirror. Eyebags, chapped lips, and a big nose greeted him. One eye was icy blue while the other nearly blind. His teeth were yellow and uneven, but he didn’t care as long he had them. He scowled at his reflection and left.

He combed his fingers through freshly cut hair while trying to recall the events of the past, what, day? He’d never been good at keeping track of time. He put on some baggy dark clothes and taking the vomit filled bucket, opened his window and dumped the bile out. Satisfied, he went to his desk and opened his journal. He scowled at the sticky-notes and carefully peeled them off the pages and threw them away. He flipped to a blank page and began writing.

Either he blacked out or zoned because when he opened his eyes the room was filled with the warm glow of the afternoon. He stretched his hands over his head and his stomach growled under his sweater. He groaned as he left the room. When he got to the dining room with a box of cereal, he saw Sundae surrounded by pictures and papers. He spotted his camera on the table, a cheap little thing he bought with what little money he had when he was a kid. His most prized possession, and Sundae kept it. He was overjoyed until she spoke.

“Blitz! I know who we’ll bring back first.” The black-clothed girl had only just noticed he was there. She picked up a photo of two girls dancing together under the un, not a care in the world. He remembered that day, he and Luci, a werewolf girl, had met Amber. He took the picture when the two were dancing to some upbeat jazz song that came on his radio.

“Wh-which one? He asked, hoping it would be Amber, as she might be easiest to find.

“Why not both? I know where they live.” Oh right, Blitz forgot she’d been stalking their friends while he was dead. This would be easy, they could get most of them done in a day. He gathered the materials they’d need, got PoisonBerry, and set off in a carriage to town.

Amber had a small apartment full of takeout boxes and unlit candles everywhere. The place was a mess and Blitz almost felt bad until he remembered that when he first met her she had been living in a doomsday bunker under a field. The curtains were closed, and the place was dusty and smelled like blood. Suddenly, the door slammed shut behind them and the candles were lit. A figure cloaked in shadows stared them down with glowing red eyes.

“A stalker you are, you should have stayed watching from afar.” Amber stepped into the dim light. PoisonBerry hid behind Sundae who stood straight-faced with her arms crossed. Blitz stepped forward, and of all the scents in the room, there was no cinnamon. The one missing was in his satchel. He pulled it out with a box of matches. He lit the candle right as the vampire struck. Fangs almost in his neck, she went limp in his arms and the light became blinding.

When their eyesight came back to them, they were under the warmth of the sun. Tendrils pure light came from the vampire’s chest. And with a burst of light, she awoke in his arms as the sun set. She let out a breathy laugh as she looked up at Blitz’s bewildered face. She cupped his face in her hands and kissed his cheek.

“Good ta’ see ya again, amigo.” She looked around and hurriedly sat up. “Where is our wolf?” She looked to him. Sundae cleared her throat and dusted herself off, leaving a shocked PoisonBerry laying in the grass.

“Your friend is in the circus, and the circus will be in town quite soon, just in time for the full moon. And since she joined recently, they have no idea.” She spoke

“S-so, what, she g-gets t-ta’ t-t-town, and w-wolf’s-wolf’s out t-to pl-play. A-and b-b-boom, j-just like-just like th-that, e’eryone’s-s d-dead.”

“Yep. So, if we don’t want a massacre on our hands, we gotta get her back quick.” Sundae stated.

When they got back home, Sundae and PoisonBerry started cooking, and Blitz and Amber started planning.

“So, as a wolf, they ain’t gonna be able to contain her. She’ll escape and look for a place where she can alone.”

“R-right, s-so we gotta-gotta he-her.”

“Do we got anything that’ll do anything like that.” Amber asked him.

Blitz went to his closet and pulled out a long chain.

“That’ll work.”

That night Blitz didn’t sleep. He thought of all that could go wrong and of his brother and sister. He had no idea if they remembered him, if they even still alive. Though he hated it, he was human, and humans feared the unknown. If his brother continued down his path of assassination, Blitz had no of knowing. Eventually, he gave up on sleep and decided to write instead.

He soon found that writing was a great way to pass the time when he heard birds chirping. Yet, right when he was going to leave the room, his body shut down. When he awoke it was obvious that his surroundings were not based in reality. The grass was a deep red, and thorny vines strangled anything that wasn’t grass. The sky was pitch black, yet in the great nothingness it seemed to all flow towards a single point. He followed the hypnotic movement of the inky nothing, each step calming and his movements languid and heavy. Eventually he found it, or rather, himself. The picture perfect of image of a younger version of him surrounded by sunflowers.

“Why, why do you put them through this? All you do causes them to suffer.” He scowled at the child, it’s voice alien and unnerving to him, its words dripping with poison. He stalked toward the child, it’s hair a blonde and tangled halo that he wanted to rip out.

“I don’t recall even speaking at such an age, child.”  He hissed, circling around it, ignoring how weird his voice sounded. “Why is it that you’ve summoned me back to the realm make-believe? To gloat about your pureness, your virginity and innocence? That won’t last you very long, you know?” His voice echoed in the small infinity.

“Nothing I do will lead me to becoming you.” It sneered at him.

“And yet, here I am, all you are is a reminder of the purity I lost, the innocence that got stolen from me.” The world vibrated and shook with every word he spoke, the sky melting into the ground, leaving an inky void everywhere. “I hate dreaming, y’know. And you, we, I hate being alone. And my friends keep me from loneliness, and you’re keeping me from my friends.” The last thing he saw was that child’s damn face, mocking him, and contorted in fear. It was an ugly sight, one he was glad to leave. Though when he came back to the real world, there was an overwhelming urge to leave. He wanted to leave. The thought had not yet crossed his mind before now, and it sickened him. Leaving meant all of his progress would be wasted. Leaving meant abandoning his friends. All those forgotten memories, wasted. Yet, he knew he would prefer for them not to know. As he packed his bag, every fiber of him screamed at him not to leave. He found himself unable to scream back. He left his home behind him, a weight lifted off his shoulders and a sickness in his gut. No one knew he was leaving. Except for PoisonBerry, who followed close behind him like a dog.

He took the long way to the docks on purpose, not wanting to go through the sunflower field. A small voice in his head told him wouldn’t be able to avoid it for long. He never could. When he got to the docks, the voice screamed at him to go back. The pirate ship he had left was there, crew members guarding his only escape. He heard a whimper behind him. Of course she was here, of course she followed him, she always did and now she was going to die. He tried to hide her in the forest edge, but it was too late. The captain, who he faintly recognized as PoisonBerry’s sister, spotted them. She called out to them, forcing them to step onto the docks, and right into their clutches.

“Well, ain’t this an odd sight, a corpse and skeleton.” The blonde walked to the pair, crew following behind. Their weapons were drawn and there was murder in their eyes. Frankly, Blitz was unaffected. It all happened so suddenly, one minute they were staring the others down, the next they were in a crate, being thrown into the ocean. Water was filling the space as they sunk. PoisonBerry was panicking, pleading, screaming tothe gods to save her. The only answer she received was the rush of water.

“Pray-prayer is f-f-futile, the-th-the gods-s are f-f-forbidd-den to answ-swer. W-we are al-l-lone in oc-cean and th-they m-might a-as w-well be d-d-dead to- to us.” His voice shook with irritation and his body shook with fear.

“This—This is all your fault! I’m going to die and it’s all thanks to you!” She screamed with rage. Hands flew to her mouth.

“Y-you’re the o-o-one who f-f-fucking f-followed m-me.” There was a shift in the pitch, he could see her eyes.

“You held a gun to my head!” Brighter. “You made me leave with nothing but the clothes on my back.” He could see tears now, glowing, angry tears. “And even when you did give me a choice, my only options were you or being lost and alone!” Brighter still, he could see everything in the box. “I-I chose—I chose you.” The green light became blinding, his ears rang, and his head ached, yet he didn’t look away.

“Welcome home, Nat-Natalie.” He whispered and closed his eyes. He felt bony arms around him, wetness forming on his sweater and sobbing in his ears. He cried too and clung to his friend like a child. “Y-you’re back—you—you’re back. You’re c-come back—come back to—to me!” They held each other tightly as if either one were to let go, the other would fade away. She pulled back from him.

“Midnight! We—we gotta get Midnight!” She stood up. He looked around, sunflowers surrounded them, and they stared only at him, judging, mocking. He closed his eyes.

“I-I g-guess Amb-ber and S-sundae got—got Luc-ci handled.”

The shewolf snarled in her cage as people began surrounding it. They took pictures and laughed at the beast. In the crowd came a loud noise. It progressively got louder as people started clearing away. Amber walked to the cage and placed the trumpet down. The wolf growled at her.

“They got cha’ caged up like some type o’ beast, huh.” She reached her hand into the cage and opened it. The wolf put her paw on the human’s hand.

On the other side of town Blitz and PoisonBerry dragged a blonde girl up a cliff. She was tied up and screaming muffled cusses and curses through the improvised gag. They made it to the top where the ritual was waiting. Blitz waited with the now panicked girl as PoisonBerry picked up a leather-bound book. Blitz shoved Midnight, the blonde, into the circle of mushrooms.

“Fe lat me hahn se fuite nam!”

The circle burned with a bright light and the witch was restored. The ropes had been burned off and Midnight stood. The lovers locked eyes.

“PoisonBerry?” She asked, her accent thick with emotion. Tears welled up in their eyes as PoisonBerry ran to her shorter counterpart. They fell to the ground, holding each other tightly and whispering to each other in their native languages.

Blitz watched on, breathless. It was like he had been a man dying of thirst, seeing this scene of two soulmates coming together was like gulping down water. It hurt like hell going down, yet the refreshing cold numbed it, making him forget everything else, if only for a second. He felt around his scarred neck for a piece of worn string. He found it and clutched the two rings tightly.

He once wrote in his journal about their dynamic. “Visually, they’re opposites. PoisonBerry is tall and almost concerningly thin, with eyes angled in a permanent scowl, pointed ears and nose and a sharp and angular jaw. Her body is boney and pale, her nails bitten down to the nub. (likely a habit she picked up from Blitzs brother) Midnight on the other hand, is short and curvy, with tanned skin. (Blitz’s brother would say she’s “thick”) Her jaw is square with an upturned nose. Her eyes are big and squared off, eyes burning with a bright orange-red flame that held so much passion. So, soft curves and boxy features stood in high contrast with angular and cat-like sharp features. They dress differently as well, yet both seem to have a strong preference for stripes. Midnight wears a lot of black high-waisted skirts and shorts, with flowing short-sleeved shirts, black and blue being her main colors. PoisonBerry wears mostly tight-fitting dresses and sleeved cloaks, blacks, reds, and purples dominated her choice of color, with the occasional splash of green. Visually, they’re opposites, but they’re both filled with a passion for life that I could never hope to have.” (frankly, he used to be jealous of that when he was little, now he doesn’t feel much about it)

When the three of them got back to the house they were met with a vampire, a werewolf, a demon, and an invitation to a masquerade. The group said their hellos and discussed dinner plans. (Lucy glared at Midnight the entire time, silently nodding along to the conversation) Blitz pointed out the moon hanging above and made them agree to have a big breakfast in the morning. While everyone else slept, Blitz fought to keep his closed. The invite they had gotten left a bad taste in his mouth. The invite had been handwritten in a script that he could barely read, fancy lettering with unnecessary loops and curves, but he knew exactly who wrote it. The invite was from his half-sister, somewhere in the back of his mind, he wondered if his brother had gotten an invite too. He really hoped not, their half-sister had put them through hell when they were kids, leaving them with invisible scars and (thankfully only on Blitz) actual scars too. So, for her to even think for a second that Ty would go was idiotic. He sat up in his bed, wanting to vent his anger out. He opened his curtains to let the moonlight in, lit a candle, and went to his desk. He opened a drawer, one full of gears and nuts and bolts and other bits and scraps he collected over the years. He set some of them on the desk, stared at them for a bit, hoping inspiration would come, then put them back. He opened another drawer and took out his journal. (he had made it when he was very into book-binding, plenty of pages that could act as whatever he wanted) He started taking an account of all that happened since he last wrote. He loved writing, it was a good way to clear his head and keep track of important and not-so-important details that he would surely forget otherwise. It was a way to escape reality, if only for a sec. And this time, escapism worked well, because before he knew it the sun was rising, his candle had melted into a pool of wax and there was knocking at his door. Sundae entered and then gagged.

“Smells like rot in here.”

He turned his chair towards her and lifted his bare arm, covered in varying levels of decay and scars, then gestured to himself, in a similar state.

“S-s-sund-dae, my-my b-body’s m-m-m-mending, it w-won’t- it’s-s gon-gonna t-take awhi-whil-le t-till it’s heal-healed.”

Sundae hummed and stepped in, closing the door behind her.

“Seems as though we’re the only ones awake, well, Amber might be, but who knows with that girl.” Sundae told him. Blitz made a gesture that said ‘well, you know her.’ Sundae hummed in agreement, leaning against the wall where the sun illuminated her features, giving her an almost angelic glow. Ironic, considering the two rather prominent dark red horns sticking from her forehead.

“Y’know, I found PoisonBerry and Midnight curled up together, making up for lost time, I suppose.” They laughed quietly to each other. (Blitz’s ended with a rather nasty cough) He walked to his dresser and took some dark colored clothes from the pile next to it. A quick sniff determined they smelled better than he did. He was buttoning up his shirt when it hit him.

“The-the i-i-inv-v-vite, M-mint s-s-sent-t it h-here, t-to us—to y-you! Sh-she re-rem-rem—she—she kn-knows you.” He curled up into himself. “Sh-she remem-remembers wh-who we are.” He whispered.

Sundae approached him carefully, acting as though he were a wild animal. He knew it was unintentional, but when the look in her eyes went from friendly to cautious, it stung.

“Blitz, relax, you’ll be ok. If anything happens, I promise it won’t happen to you.” She was trying so hard to be comforting, but in his mind, that promise was empty, it twisted like a viper in his thoughts, mocking and tormenting and cruel and manipulating. He knew it wasn’t, Sundae has always been his most trustworthy friend, but he couldn’t help it.

Slowly they stood together, and with shaky hands, he got dressed, slowly, but still.

They eventually got everyone up and ready. (PoisonBerry made the process more difficult than needed, but still) Blitz suggested they go to Pepper’s café. The walk there was peaceful aside from Blitz’s occasional coughing fits. As the group was walking in, someone walked out. The person rudely bumped shoulders with Amber, calling her a deadbeat lawyer. Blitz saw red. He told the group to go head inside and order. Reluctantly, they agreed. (though PoisonBerry sensed a fight and wanted to join, Midnight glared her down till she went with the rest of the group) He glared at the stranger. The person was, to put it simply, jacked. He had at least a head on Blitz, then again, most people did. (stunted growth along with being biologically female will make you shorter than most other guys) To anyone else, the person seemed to have the upper hand, but Blitz wasn’t planning to fight. He shoved his hands in his pockets and snarled at the stranger.

“I-if we were-weren’t-t i-in p-publi-lic I-I’d b-beh-head you.” The person snorted with laughter in response and Blitz lost control. He lunged at the stranger, his mind far away while his body acted on its own. He felt familiar arms wrap around him, pulling him back. The stranger’s face was a bloody mess. Taking one final look at Blitz, the stranger ran.

“Sir,” he looked up at the voice, and stared into aqua eyes. “I don’t tolerate violence at my establishment.”

“Sorry about him, he’s” He looked at Sundae, her hands in her coat pockets and her eyes filled with shame and embarrassment.

He pushed himself from Pepper’s grip and looked at her. Concern and anger were etched into her features. He dug around his jacket pocket and pulled out two necklaces that were tangled around his fingers. He opened his hand, palm facing down, and the sun and moon pendants glittered in the sunlight. He took Pepper’s hand and placed the necklaces in her palm.

“I-I—uh—h-hope this—th-this m-makes up f-for—for wh-what I-I’ve d-d-one.” He disconnected his hand from hers and nodded towards the door. He and Sundae walked in and sat down at the booth with the others.

“S-s-so, you-you’re law-l-lawyer?” He asked Amber, to get rid of the silence. She laughed, and time seemed to move again.

“Yeah dude, a good one, at that!”

“So, like, is candle-making a hobby or somethin’?” PoisonBerry asked, confused by the new information.

“I think she became a lawyer when her memories were false.” Midnight interjected. The conversation continued while Blitz and Luci stayed silent. Well, at least he was paying attention, Luci was chewing on the napkins. C.C. arrived with their food and drinks and Blitz locked eyes with her. He swore he saw some of recognition there. She smiled at him as she left, and he smiled back.  He saw Pepper rush into the kitchen while they ate. He didn’t expect her or her twin to get their memories back for quite a while, as even when he came back from the dead the first time it took a while for them to remember.

Then the bell jingled, and a lady came in who was obviously trying to conceal her identity, yet even with sunglasses and a hat, he knew who she was. He could smell not only the fear and anxiety radiating off her, but also the faint stench of sulfur. Her name was Lola Viper, and in her hand she held an invitation.

[asexual-society]

Aspec & Arospec YouTube List Part 2!

Apparently there are a lot more ace youtubers that I missed on the last list…

The descriptions for each channel are pretty much just copied and pasted from their channel descriptions. Unless they didn’t have a description, in which case I just wrote ‘vlogger’.

Please note: All the content of the channels below may or may not reflect the views or opinions of this blog or it’s moderators. Nor is all of it safe for work or free of problematic elements. Please use your own discretion. 

Note 2: If your favorite youtuber is not on this list, feel free to add on! 

Enjoy!

Aaron Ansuini: A trans ace vlogger who talks about both asexuality, being trans, video games, art, and motivation; Twitter

Abbie Wells: Aspec singer, actress, and vlogger; Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram 

Aced It!: We are just a handful of Ace/Aro YouTubers who wanted to make a community to chat! Hang out let’s talk! ; instagram

Ace Ideas: We are a diverse group of asexuals here to share our knowledge, experiences, passions, hobbies, and stories surrounding our asexuality.; Facebook, tumblr, twitter 

Aceland Alexander Kent: Transgender-Male, Homoromantic, Aceflux-Asexual musician and vlogger. He used to run the queer information channel, Questions and Queeries ; Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, BandCamp

Ahsante the Artist: Artist, Storyteller, Harvard 2015. A place for educated discussion, spirited lifestyle, cultural critique, creative reflection, and the silly goings on in the life and mind of Ahsante; website, Tumblr, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Portfolio website, Patreon

Androigynous: Hey guys! Andie here. Your resident cat girl. You’ll find gameplay, art, unboxings and feline vlogs! There’s something for everyone. ✨; instagram, facebook

Antastesia: A French asexual feminism/lifestyle/travel/vegan vlogger; Tumblr, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, professional website

Anthony Pero: Posting funny videos and skits with the purpose of making people laugh. I like to focus on anything from serious topics like depression to goofier subjects like my Facebook newsfeed. My channel also consists of parodies of people I know, things I see, or random events that I think need to be spoofed; Twitter, Facebook, Instagram

ArtByFlan: Sometimes I draw things. Sometimes I record myself drawing things. Sometimes I post videos of myself drawing things here!; tumblr, deviantart, facebook, twitter

Asexualise My Asexual Life:  Asexualise Your Asexual Life: Empower And Enhance Your Asexual Life. Giving Asexuals a voice in the world. It is my mission to give asexuals a voice in the world; to empower other asexuals to be comfortable and confident with their asexuality; and to give insight into my colourful asexual life, to enable others to better understand their own and to know they are not alone. I want to educate others about asexuality, so that in the future, all asexuals can live in society happily.; twitter, facebook 

Autistic Asexual fangirl Adventures: just a vlog page, random ramblings and adventures of a autistic asexual and geek who wants to try and make the word a better place.; twitter

BaptismOnFire: My name is Jack, I love horror and all things creepy. Here you’ll find videos about nightmares, monsters, creepypasta and generally spooky things! Remember to watch the skies, stay paranoid and trust no one…; Twitter, Tumblr, DeviantArt

Blue Phoenix Ace: American ace education vlogger. My goal is to educate people about Aromanticism and Asexuality, because maybe it will help someone learn the truth about themselves before they hit the age of 37!; music channel, Website, Soundcloud, Facebook

BreakfastAlexis: An asexual artist who creates animatics; tumblr, twitter, redbubble

Brian Langevin: Occasional videos discussing asexuality and life in general! This channel also hosts an archive of Everything’s A-Okay - a project Brian Langevin started alongside the project’s writer, Amy Liang, to bring greater visibility to asexuality; Twitter

Channel for Positivity l Understanding l Justice: Demisexual Korean-American motivational vlogger. Stay woke. See BOTH Sides. Social Justice. Bite-Sized Politics. Build more POSITIVITY :D Pragmatic Utopian. Diversity. Understand Humans & Relationships. Embrace Progress.; twitter, tumblr

Christi Kerr: This channel is a mix of whatever I like to do, which mainly includes vlogging but could include any number of things; Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, SnapChat, Instagram

Christine Sydelko: The youtube channel of vine-star/popular internet comedian and her boyfriend; Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat

Clara Unleashed: Denmark based asexual/biromanic vlogger. They also run the aspec focused youtube channel, My Ace Experience ; Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr

Cultlleader: Asexual Vlogger; Instagram, twitter

curlybobofelia: UK based asexuality Awareness, LGBTQ, Mental Health Awareness, Disability Rights, Child Rights & Anti-bullying Advocate vlogger; Tumblr, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram

Dylan Tyler: I’m Dylan, and I suck at writing the intro things, so let’s just eat a lot of popcorn together and do an unhealthy amount of binge watching. Subscribing makes it easier to find me when you’re up for binging :) ; instagram, twitter

ElectraSnow: Demisexual artist, makeup artist, and special effects makeup expert: Twitter, Etsy, Tumblr, Facebook

Elisa Hansen/Maven of the Eventide: Voraciously vivacious Vampire Reviews. The Maven peers into the realms of the creatures of the night for a humorous analysis of vampires in media and pop culture; Twitter, Facebook

Embly: 18 years old, also the cutest small potato in the neighbourhood, wine mum, also very salty and nostalgic over a jam sandwich she lost over 2 years ago; Twitter, Instagram

Estelle Z: Music, vlogs, scrapbooks, and whatever else I happen to fancy; Tumblr, Twitter, Soundcloud, Facebook, Patreon, Gumroad

happy fish: Autistic, mentally ill, queer, nonbinary person vlogging about my life and trying to pretend I know how to function as an adult.; etsy, tumblr

Heroic Pages: Canadian, lover of books, films and imagination…and also a huge nerd!! Critter! Very much an unapologetic introvert (INTJ) ACE hermit cat lady den mother!; twitter, instagram, goodreads

JakeMale TV: I do Comedy sketch videos but also Vlogs! I share my life experiences with you so you can laugh at my mistakes. I have funny moments in my life, come and join me living my life. Click on ‘SUBSCRIBE’ to be told when I upload a new video! I advice it, MY LIFE IS WEIRD! I also do a University Advice series!; twitter, facebook, vimeo

Jeff Miller: Demiromantic/demisexual transmasculine musician, actor, and all around content creator; Patreon, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr

janeil darnell: An aroace vlogger; twitter

jennaclarek: Heteroromantic asexual. I just graduated college with a BS degree (get it) in Audio/Video Production. I’m also obsessed with Taylor Swift, strawberry cake, and musicals. I mostly make videos about books, but I also make videos about my life, my faith, and the other things I enjoy!; goodreads, twitter, tumblr, instagram, bandcamp

Jourdann: A channel that’s all about ships (the tv kind), college life, and artsy videos; Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram

kaihugstrees: Non-binary asexual. I make videos every week about my life, from travel vlogs and challenges to videos about mental health, disability, and queer topics; Twitter, Tumblr

Kelly McCraw: Akoiromantic Asexual vlogger

Marshall John Blount: Just an Ace guy trying to make it through life…This vlog will be about my everyday life and Asexual awareness…..I hope y'all will tag along on this interesting journey with me 💜💜

marsisnotcreative: Brazilian vlogger. Does covers of songs, videos chatting about stuff i enjoy, giving opinions, rants about some things that bother me, pseudo-artsy videos; twitter, tumblr, instagram

megathornberryy: Aspec book reviewer and vlogger; Goodreads, Twitter, Instagram

Milo Stewart: My name is Milo and my pronouns are they/them. Gender confused college kid named “YouTube’s most controversial trans vlogger” by The Daily Dot; Twitter, Instagram

Mikey Neumann (of Chainsawsuit Original): Ace president of Chainsaw Original and film critic ; Twitter, Website

moonchild: My channel covers a large variety of topics and genres, some of which include asexuality, body modifications, mental health, with the occasional story time or rant video thrown in; Tumblr

Overlysarcasticproductions: Sarcastic, yet informative, summaries of classic and not-so-classic literature and mythology, as well as major historical events! (Red has stated that she is asexual); threadless, cafepress, twitter

Peach The College Girl’s Vlog: Asexual Biromantic gaming channel ;twitter, twitch, snapchat

Phoebe Saturn : i make youtube videos as a hobby and hopefully have a positive impact on your day :] ; twitter

ppusherr: Gender, Sexuality, and Social Issues solved with Positivity and Education; Tumblr

punkygirlontherock: Asexual Canadian vlogger

Ricky Dillon: American YouTube personality and singer-songwriter; Book website, Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, Spotify

Sally Le Page: Grey-ace UK vlogger. Aims to bring science further into popular culture by making science videos that make you laugh, make you feel and make you think; Website, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Flickr

sara elizabeth: Demisexual American make-up vlogger. i’m sara and i’m sorta obsessed with makeup and musicals; twitter, instagram

Sebastian Columbine: A horror and surrealist, filmmaker and artist in Los Angeles, California. This youtube channel surrounds Sebastian’s unique style, both in terms of fashion and beauty, as well as their lifestyle and artistic endeavors; Professional blog/website, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Patreon

skellydun: life is an experience. here are some of mine; Tumblr

SixFootNerd: British, six foot and a total nerd! Just someone talking about Movie/Tv News, Events, Reviews and Discussions; Twitter, Tumblr

Sophie Foster: Demisexual/biromantic fashion, makeup, and lifestyle vlogger from the UK; Tumblr, Twitter, Instagram

SoulOfEbony: I wanna scribble cartoons for a living and make people smile.; tumblr, twitter

Taye Nic: I’m just an 20 year old college student who is trying to live for the first time:) Lol, I just got into makeup! I also love making things, broadway, Disney, my boho chic style lol and NYC more than anything else! I also love to make friends so stop by; twitter, instagram, pinterest

The Asexual Goddess: Ace and in your face. I’m actually an introvert so i don’t know how that works

TheGothicAlice: Asexual Aromantic artist, Manic Panic dyehard, horror junkie, cynic, and part time model; facebook, Etsy, Tumblr

TheMysteriousMrEnter: Asexual/Aromantic animation reviewer; DeviantArt, Tumblr, Twitter, TvTropes, Facebook,

Vivi Addams: Feel free to hang around for a while, watch some Lego animations, hopefully subscribe… Enjoy!; Tumblr, Twitter

[turtle-paced]

2) also what are your thoughts on book sansa and arya relationship? I've read some absurd posts about Sansa apparently abusing Arya or that she doesn't love her at all. And i really wanted to know your opinion Thank you!

Sansa and Arya didn’t understand each other, were often frustrated with each other, and lived in an environment that portrayed Sansa as the ideal Arya should be working for and Arya’s preferences as improper. They spent a great deal of AGoT very angry with each other, and in a hostile situation with frankly inadequate adult supervision.

They love each other, too.

One of the very first things we learn about the relationship between the sisters is that the issue of proper ladylike behaviour is a sticking point - not helped by Septa Mordane.

“Sansa’s work is as pretty asshe is,” Septa Mordane told their lady mother once. “She has such fine, delicate hands.” WhenLady Catelyn had asked about Arya, the septa had sniffed. “Arya has the hands of a blacksmith.”

- Arya I, AGoT

Arya, who’s still a child after all, finds it much easier to resent Sansa than to think “hang on, this authority figure is bad at her job,” or that the system that values Sansa’s appearance and skills to the point where Arya cannot freely express her own talents and preferences might be a bad construct. We see that clearly with this passage:

[Sansa] smiled for the septa. “Arya and I wereremarking on how pleased we were to have the princess with us today,” she said.

Septa Mordane nodded. “Indeed. A great honor for us all.” Princess Myrcella smileduncertainly at the compliment. “Arya, why aren’t you at work?” the septa asked. She rose to herfeet, starched skirts rustling as she started across the room. “Let me see your stitches.”

Arya wanted to scream. It was just like Sansa to go and attract the septa’s attention. “Here,” shesaid, surrendering up her work.

The septa examined the fabric. “Arya, Arya, Arya,” she said. “This will not do. This will not doat all.”

- Arya I, AGoT

Arya’s the one who attracted Septa Mordane’s attention by speaking “far too loudly” a few lines previously. But Arya blames Sansa, because she doesn’t have the intellectual tools she needs to realise and express to the reader that this entire situation, public humiliation and all, is Septa Mordane’s doing. Nobody’s stopping Septa Mordane from going over to Arya and quietly helping Arya correct her own work without making any sort of fuss in front of Arya’s sister and the visiting princess, after all.

In the meantime, Sansa was definitely trying to cover for Arya’s faux pas, and not anything malicious. See this from the opening of Sansa’s own PoV chapter:

The septa was not appeased. “You’re a good girl, Sansa, but I do vow, when it comes to thatcreature you’re as willful as your sister Arya.” She scowled. “And where is Arya this morning?” 

“She wasn’t hungry,” Sansa said, knowing full well that her sister had probably stolen down to the kitchen hours ago and wheedled a breakfast out of some cook’s boy.

- Sansa I, AGoT

Sansa doesn’t understand why Arya does this or even wants to do this, but she’s still covering for her little sister with Septa Mordane, unasked.

The inability to critique the system goes both ways. It’s more obvious with Sansa, who’s good at the things her society says she should be good at, and who hasn’t yet found a personal reason to start questioning the authorities around her.

Sansa regarded her scrawny little sister in disbelief. “You can’t look for rubies, the princess isexpecting us. The queen invited us both.”

“I don’t care,” Arya said. “The wheelhouse doesn’t even have windows, you can’t see a thing.”

“What could you want to see?” Sansa said, annoyed. She had been thrilled by the invitation,and her stupid sister was going to ruin everything, just as she’d feared.

- Sansa I, AGoT

The situation is more serious than it might appear from this very childish spat. Sansa’s going to meet with a powerful woman who might be her mother-in-law one day. Said powerful woman asked for Sansa and Arya. Arya declining the invitation for no more reason than she’d rather go riding, thanks, is one of those things that’s not on in this situation. If Arya doesn’t show up, Sansa’s on the spot.

(It’s also a situation where Ned should be paying more attention to his daughters and exacting a bit more discipline.)

And also because neither of them are in a position to start criticising the system and the people above them, it’s hard for them to come to grips with what happened at the Ruby Ford with Joffrey and Mycah, and the fallout. Sansa can’t bring herself to criticise her prince, much less in public; Arya doesn’t understand Sansa’s position vis-a-vis Joffrey (or that Joffrey had been getting Sansa drunk). Arya, to her credit, immediately sticks up for Lady. But even then it’s easier for them to blame each other than it is to blame Cersei and Joffrey, who had to see Arya punished, a direwolf dead, and Mycah murdered.

Arya’s friend and Sansa’s pet were killed over Joffrey’s cruelty. It’s worth being angry about. Which is what we see both sisters experience throughout AGoT.

Ned does help Arya get through it better.

“Grieve for your friend, but neverblame yourself. You did not kill the butcher’s boy. That murder lies at the Hound’s door, himand the cruel woman he serves.”

“I hate them,” Arya confided, red-faced, sniffling. “The Hound and the queen and the king andPrince Joffrey. I hate all of them. Joffrey lied, it wasn’t the way he said. I hate Sansa too. She didremember, she just lied so Joffrey would like her.”

“We all lie,” her father said. “Or did you truly think I’d believe that Nymeria ran off?”

- Arya II, AGoT

The show clarified it even further, spelling out the situation Sansa’s in due to her betrothal to Joffrey. Then Ned gives her a big damn monologue.

“Let me tell you something about wolves, child. When the snows fall and the white winds blow,the lone wolf dies, but the pack survives. Summer is the time for squabbles. In winter, we mustprotect one another, keep each other warm, share our strengths. So if you must hate, Arya, hate those who would truly do us harm. Septa Mordane is a good woman, and Sansa… Sansa is yoursister. You may be as different as the sun and the moon, but the same blood flows through bothyour hearts. You need her, as she needs you… and I need both of you, gods help me.”

He sounded so tired that it made Arya sad. “I don’t hate Sansa,” she told him. “Not truly.” Itwas only half a lie.

“I do not mean to frighten you, but neither will I lie to you. We have come to a dark dangerousplace, child. This is not Winterfell. We have enemies who mean us ill. We cannot fight a waramong ourselves. This willfulness of yours, the running off, the angry words, the disobedience…at home, these were only the summer games of a child. Here and now, with winter soon upon us,that is a different matter. It is time to begin growing up.”

- Arya II, AGoT

Then he makes sure Arya has an outlet for her frustrations and her passions by finding her Syrio Forel. This was an important speech, and that and the sword lessons help Arya immensely. As early as Arya III, we see this:

Quickly [Arya] lowered her head and dropped to oneknee. Maybe [Myrcella and Tommen] wouldn’t recognize her. If they did, she would never hear the end of it. SeptaMordane would be mortified, and Sansa would never speak to her again from the shame.

And that would be bad. See also here, her reaction after she threw an orange at Sansa for repeating the Joffrey-approved narrative of what happened at Darry.

Arya raised her eyes. “I’m sorry, Father. I was wrong and I beg my sweet sister’s forgiveness.” 

Sansa was so startled that for a moment she was speechless. Finally she found her voice. “What about my dress?”

“Maybe… I could wash it,” Arya said doubtfully.

“Washing won’t do any good,” Sansa said. “Not if you scrubbed all day and all night. The silk is ruined.”

“Then I’ll… make you a new one,” Arya said.

- Sansa III, AGoT

“It won’t be so bad, Sansa,” Arya said. “We’re going to sail on a galley. It will be an adventure,and then we’ll be with Bran and Robb again, and Old Nan and Hodor and the rest.” She touchedher on the arm.

- Sansa III, AGoT

Improvement!

Ned does not explain things to Sansa as he does to Arya, not so much as “the fault lies with Cersei and Joffrey.” So while Arya’s attitude markedly improves with this explanation, Sansa’s stuck.

At first she thought she hated him for what they’d done to Lady,but after Sansa had wept her eyes dry, she told herself that it had not been Joffrey’s doing, nottruly. The queen had done it; she was the one to hate, her and Arya. Nothing bad would havehappened except for Arya.

- Sansa II, AGoT

She’s desperately trying to fulfil expectations, with almost no idea why her efforts aren’t paying off with Joffrey’s love. Sandor calls her on it.

Sandor Clegane stopped suddenly in the middle of a dark and empty field. She had no choice but to stop beside him. “Some septa trained you well. You’re like one of those birds from theSummer Isles, aren’t you? A pretty little talking bird, repeating all the pretty little words theytaught you to recite.”

- Sansa II, AGoT

Her immaturity, specifically the way in which she refuses to look beyond surfaces, and the lack of proper explanation has resulted in Sansa not understanding the nature what’s really going on in King’s Landing. Which results in her continuing to blame her sister for Lady’s death, and various unkind, uncharitable thoughts.

The kitchen yielded no lemon cakes, but they did find half of a cold strawberry pie, and thatwas almost as good. They ate it on the tower steps, giggling and gossiping and sharing secrets,and Sansa went to bed that night feeling almost as wicked as Arya.

- Sansa III, AGoT

No two ways to slice it here, this just plain isn’t nice. It’s a notable feature of Sansa III of AGoT, Sansa acting like a spoilt brat. (Not that she’s the only Stark child to behave that way.)

“Go ahead, call me all the names you want,” Sansa said airily. “You won’t dare when I’m married to Joffrey. You’ll have to bow to me and call me Your Grace.” She shrieked as Aryaflung the orange across the table. It caught her in the middle of the forehead with a wet squishand plopped down into her lap.

“You have juice on your face, Your Grace,” Arya said.

It was running down her nose and stinging her eyes. Sansa wiped it away with a napkin. Whenshe saw what the fruit in her lap had done to her beautiful ivory silk dress, she shrieked again.“You’re horrible,” she screamed at her sister. “They should have killed you instead of Lady!”

She forgets about Arya almost entirely during Sansa IV, AGoT.

It was not until later that night, as she was drifting off to sleep, that Sansa realised she hadforgotten to ask about her sister.

Note, however, that this is these are the final words of the chapter. This is not a pleasant realisation for Sansa. This is meant to be disquieting. 

And at the end, near last, came the names Sansa had been dreading. Lady Catelyn Stark. RobbStark. Brandon Stark, Rickon Stark, Arya Stark. Sansa stifled a gasp. Arya. They wanted Arya topresent herself and swear an oath… it must mean her sister had fled on the galley, she must besafe at Winterfell by now…

- Sansa V, AGoT

So we know that between the end of Sansa IV and the start of Sansa V, Sansa did think about where her sister might be. Arya was in her thoughts.

Everything changes with Ned’s execution. Both girls are present for this, though Sansa doesn’t know it. It is a notable feature of Arya’s narration throughout that she doesn’t see what happens, she hears it. And a lot of what she hears is Sansa screaming and crying.

Afterwards, it’s apparent that no, seriously, even if they didn’t understand each other and they didn’t get along very well, Sansa and Arya love each other.

Arya never looked back. She wished theRush would rise and wash the whole city away, Flea Bottom and the Red Keep and the GreatSept and everything, and everyone too, especially Prince Joffrey and his mother. But she knew itwouldn’t, and anyhow Sansa was still in the city and would wash away too. When sheremembered that, Arya decided to wish for Winterfell instead.

- Arya I, ACoK

Arya hates King’s Landing that much…but not so much she can wish Sansa dead. Thinking of Sansa makes her sad in Arya II, ACoK.

When she thought of seeing Robb’s face again Arya had to biteher lip. And I want to see Jon too, and Bran and Rickon, and Mother. Even Sansa… I’ll kiss herand beg her pardons like a proper lady, she’ll like that.

- Arya VII, ACoK

It also comes out more strongly that as frustrating and incomprehensible as Arya finds Sansa’s interests, Arya respects and admires her sister’s skills, both with heraldry and history (Arya VII, ACoK) and with music (Arya IV, ASoS).

When news comes out that Sansa’s gone missing as well, it hurts Arya a lot.

If Sansa was gone too, there were no more Starks but her.

- Arya XIII, ASoS

Because when she thinks of her family, Sansa is most definitely a part of it.

She had been Arry and Weasel too, and Squab and Salty, Nan the cupbearer, a greymouse, a sheep, the ghost of Harrenhal… but not for true, not in her heart of hearts. In there shewas Arya of Winterfell, the daughter of Lord Eddard Stark and Lady Catelyn, who had once hadbrothers named Robb and Bran and Rickon, a sister named Sansa, a direwolf called Nymeria, ahalf brother named Jon Snow.

- Arya II, AFFC

Winterfell, she might have said. I smell snow and smoke and pine needles. I smell the stables. Ismell Hodor laughing, and Jon and Robb battling in the yard, and Sansa singing about some stupid lady fair. I smell the crypts where the stone kings sit, I smell hot bread baking, I smell thegodswood. I smell my wolf, I smell her fur, almost as if she were still beside me.

- Arya II, AFFC

On Sansa’s part, it is very much a feature of her coping mechanisms that she Doesn’t Think About Things, and she believes Arya is dead. Nevertheless, we do see that Sansa doesn’t forget about her sister again.

She sang formercy, for the living and the dead alike, for Bran and Rickon and Robb, for her sister Arya andher bastard brother Jon Snow, away off on the Wall. She sang for her mother and her father, forher grandfather Lord Hoster and her uncle Edmure Tully, for her friend Jeyne Poole, for olddrunken King Robert, for Septa Mordane and Ser Dontos and Jory Cassel and Maester Luwin,for all the brave knights and soldiers who would die today, and for the children and the wiveswho would mourn them, and finally, toward the end, she even sang for Tyrion the Imp and forthe Hound. He is no true knight but he saved me all the same, she told the Mother.

- Sansa V, ACoK

In Sansa’s dreams, her children looked just like the brothers she had lost. Sometimes there was even a girl who looked like Arya.

- Sansa II, ASoS

She awoke all at once, every nerve atingle. For a moment she did not remember where she was. She had dreamt that she was little, still sharing a bedchamber with her sister Arya. But it was her maid she heard tossing in sleep, not her sister, and this was not Winterfell, but the Eyrie.

- Sansa VII, ASoS

She remembered a summer’s snow in Winterfell when Arya and Bran had ambushed her as she emerged from the keep one morning. They’d each had a dozen snowballs to hand, and she’d had none. Bran had been perched on the roof of the covered bridge, out of reach, but Sansa had chased Arya through the stables and around the kitchen until both of them were breathless. She might even have caught her, but she’d slipped on some ice. Her sister came back to see if she was hurt. When she said she wasn’t, Arya hit her in the face with another snowball, but Sansa grabbed her leg and pulled her down and was rubbing snow in her hair when Jory came along and pulled them apart, laughing.

- Sansa VII, ASoS

There’s nothing to call these memories but happy and fond.

As we see Arya appreciating Sansa’s skills, we see from time to time Sansa approving of Arya’s earlier actions. This is a memory she comes back to more than once.

[Joffrey had] owned a sword named Lion’s Tooth once, Sansa remembered. Arya had taken it from him and thrown it in a river. I hope Stannis does the same with this one.

- Sansa V, ACoK

That said, in many ways Arya remains incomprehensible to Sansa as well. When she meets Margaery, we get this:

Sister. Sansa had once dreamt of having a sister like Margaery; beautiful and gentle, with all the world’s graces at her command. Arya had been entirely unsatisfactory as sisters went. How can I let my sister marry Joffrey? she thought, and suddenly her eyes were full of tears.

- Sansa II, ASoS

But from the phrasing, I suspect that Sansa couldn’t let Arya marry Joffrey either. Unsatisfactory or not.

Her belief that Arya’s dead hurts Sansa as much as Arya’s belief that Sansa is dead hurts Arya.

I must be brave. Her torments would soon be ended, one way or the other. If Lady was here, I would not be afraid. Lady was dead, though; Robb, Bran, Rickon, Arya, her father, her mother, even Septa Mordane. All of them are dead but me. She was alone in the world now.

- Sansa IV, ASoS

So yes. No matter how different they are, no matter that their storylines in AGoT are in large part devoted to the worst they’ve ever got along and the angriest they’ve ever been with each other, no matter that the patriarchy and their education values Sansa’s skills more than Arya’s skills and this affects how they think of each other, this is still a loving relationship. Just not a particularly easy one, for either of them. When they reunite, I’m betting that their childish differences don’t look half so insurmountable as they did in AGoT.