#im about to start collecting lesbians

[ice-palace-art]

If i ever get around to listening to Castle audios (im very close to caving) i will do what i do with redacted and make the couples only queer couples.

Redacted is a mlm/nblm universe while Castle is a wlw/nblw universe

Cishet? Whats that? Never heard of her.

[aesrot]

.

[lesbaurinkos]

its literally so sad that so many people in this world dont understand that riverdale is the show of all time ever. because cheryl blossom is the Most character of all fucking time and everyone in the entire universe should know about her and cherish her. shes clinically insane. she experiences female hysteria like no other. she is the most seen ive ever felt by a lesbian in television because she is just off her fucking rocker at all times and thats the best representation i could ask for. she constantly talks like shes possessed by a victorian ghost. she once WAS possessed by a victorian ghost (her ancestor, also a lesbian, because lesbianism is genetic like being a serial killer is). she was also haunted by the ghost of a triplet she thought she absorbed but didnt actually absorb in the womb possessing a porcelain doll and then when they went to the 50s that porcelain doll became a real boy. her having lesbian sex saved the world. she faked stigmata for clout while canonizing herself as the first living saint in order to take over the musical theater cult her mother had started around her dead twin brother as a christ figure and maple syrup as the blood of christ, but cheryl succeeded in taking over the cult because she and gay kevin wanted to sing songs. she’s also committed to ruining gay kevin’s life just for funsies most of the time. she lives in a creepy gothic mansion and goes about wearing flowing dressing gowns and carrying candelabras despite fully living in the 2020s (except for right now bc everyone got zapped to the 1950s) because her life is a gothic horror. she kept the taxidermed corpse of her dead twin in the basement for a while just for funsies because she is balls to the walls insane. when her uncle found said corpse he attacked her and her girlfriend accidentally killed him so the two of them plus her creepy haunted grandma decided to gaslight the man’s wife and child into thinking they had cannibalized him over thanksgiving dinner (it was awesome). also shes really good with a bow and arrow for funsies. shes one of the few characters on tv that actually says “im a lesbian” out loud. she has magical witch powers and can blow people up with her mind, literally, actually. once she got so fucking mad at a the leader of a different cult she had gotten roped into because he said that she couldn’t run for prom queen that she managed to deprogram herself basically overnight. for a while she was building her own version of the winchester mystery house due to being plagued by hysteria. shes an incredibly skilled artist who did forgery for a while. she can control bees with her mind. She’s The Queen Of The Bees. she had a collection of small witch girls in the splinter universe rivervale that were all dressed like rei from evangelion for no clear reason and went about performing ritualistic sacrifices in the woods. she’ll say shit like “my dear antoinette thou hast beguiled me” and “im cuckoo bananas for you, obvi” and “do you think these loubotins are too flashy for kombucha brewing?” with the same level of utter conviction. she is so, so haunted. she has suffered more than jesus. she is a girlboss she is a lunatic she is a war criminal and she is never going to die.

[canaidliafail]

Stay grounded

streamer Abby x streamer f!reader 🌿

[part 1 ]. [part 2]

Not proof read like at all. pure crap. Im just horny had an idea and wrote it down. enjoy tho~ MDI cause it will get explicit in later chapters

CW: college exams, weed

“fuck, give me a caption”

“I like tits”

“literally fuck you”

you mumbled and your friends laughed, enjoying your misery. You stared at the blank space below your post and pursed your lips in concentration. Eventually you started typing cringing at every word

“trying some new products ˖◛⁺ ⑅ ♡”

and pressed “post” on the photo tossing your phone on the other side of the couch defeated. Been a presence online sure had its fun but you were also filled with the existential dread that people knew you “existed”

150k people to be exact. not much but more than you ever expected to get from your hobby. You usually posted your figurine collection from the most recent games you streamed with the occasional over the top pic of you dolled up and in clothes styled to fit the game of the month which unsurprisingly always over performed in statistics.

you had been doing this for a good two years now give or take and it was a wild turn of events considering how quickly and well your career took off. You loved the financial comfort but hated how exposed you constantly felt.

“Don't you have a stream tonight?” your friend,june, asked and you shook your head rubbing your face and squeezing your eyes shut to hopefully get rid of the persistent ache

“No, I'm resting for the week. Told them I have exams or whatever”

she passed you the blunt and you took a few puffs in silence staring into space

“Mind if I put on some music?”

“no go ahead” you mumbled and went to the kitchen to make coffee as you heard the first notes of mr.kitty after dark play in the living room.

“We need to go on a trip somewhere”. June said and Cassie agreed

“trip? where?” you shouted loud enough to be heard across the halls

“I don't know man but like, leave this town for a bit. Remember how fun we had on our last trip ?”

you smiled. Italy was fun. England was insane and Germany was borderline a fever dream. all three unique and all three with a romantic disappointment that entertained your friend group for months and you had to admit you had been craving leaving your city for a while now. Had it not been for the fact that you were on your last semester at college you would be somewhere else every other week -without any romantic endeavors-

You made the quickest shittiest coffee and went back to the living room sitting on the floor “Once Im done with exams we can go anywhere you want” you promised. Your phone pinged the flash going on and off

“What the fuck”

“Im suing for optical damage”

they yelled and grabbed your phone tossing it your way and you all but laughed

“Sorry sorry my bad forgot to turn off flash alerts”

You tapped your screen and almost choked on your coffee fumbling to unlock your phone the lyrics blurring in the background until they became a numbing buzz

staygrounded69 just made a new post

you tapped the icon and saw the new photo. You couldn’t quite understand what it was about her but she had you hooked and entirely captivated. It wasn’t a crush but you always found yourself checking for new posts or streams.

Abby, known by her public name staygrounded was a gamer who streamed here and there. In a more a casual stream she eventually explained that her nickname was a jab by her friend when she asked for ideas and he said “staygrounded, get it? cause of your fear of heights?” and it just stuck by.

That wasn’t why she had blown up though. No it was due to her coming out as a lesbian and that fueled every female straight and not. She was after all, a tall muscular woman with beautiful blonde hair and a face with unique features that deserved appreciation in the form of oil paintings and perhaps a face seating

you shook your head trying not to let your mind fall too deep into hopeless thirsty thoughts and admired the new photo. a casual gym pic. Fuck she wasn’t even flexing her muscles or anything. she wore the baggiest grey sweatpants with a black hoodie and a black cap with her braided hair and the lower half of her face peaking through sitting on a bench casually

and yet you felt weak. you bit your lower lip and chewed on it a little

“Cotton????” your friends called out to you by your streamer nickname and snapped their fingers. you looked up feeling your cheeks heat up

“aaah did she post?”

“mhm” you nod excitedly and went back to looking at the photo. You tapped the share button and posted it on your story leaving a small note

“her <3”

not been shy of publicly “aPprEciAtiNg” her since she was hell of a popular figure and would for sure not see your reshare.you let out a sigh and june smirked

“what ails you my victorian maiden”

“I love women” you said dreamily and took a sip of your coffee

“Wish they loved you back” Cassie bit and you grabbed your pillow and went over to her “oh you’re dead” you barked and she laughed as you started playfully smothering her with the stuffed item.

“alright time for me to bounce” june said first and grabbed her things “my teacher will probably be up my ass for coming so late” she groaned and you looked at the time “yeah I need to also get going”

“sucks to suck. Ill go take a nap” Cassie said and grabbed her things.

you and June both had afternoon classes while Cassie was happily a drop out who did seasonal work and rested during winter. The two of you were very visibly jealous of her not having to deal with the pain of exams.

“Yeah yeah get over yourself” June said jabbing her at her sides and Cassie yelped running in front of her, June chasing her down the stairs and you being the last one to leave the apartment to lock the door.

•••

You were in class when it happened. Your week ended with a babging 3 hour lecture entirely dedicated to pattern making. You were ready to grab the scissors and stab yourself to end this. You friend also seemed to slowly wither away while your teacher remained as chipper as always

“Now regarding coats-“ she continued and you pushed your chair away from the desk softly getting up to grab fresh paper to start copying the notes she was starting to draw on the board

You spread it out on your desk and grabbed the ruler and pencil and started measuring a No.44 coat purposefully being slower than usual so that you wouldn’t have to do much work. Your brain was squeezed dry for the day and this class was always the most difficult

you grabbed your phone to take a picture of the finished measurements and pattern on the board to have it for later. You opened the camera and zoomed in ready to take a pic

staygrounded69 liked your story

came the first notification and you fumbled with your phone as it nearly fell off of your hands. You sat down on your chair and stared at the icon for a hard long minute not wanting to tap it and see just a fan account instead. You decided to stay delusional

staygrounded69 liked your post

staygrounded69 liked your post

a few minutes later came another few notifications and then that was it. You opened your page and tapped the username that led to her profile.

holy shit

it really was her

its fucking her

You breathed in quitting her page and tapping her username again still in disbelief. She saw your photos. She had specifically liked the ones with your face in.

“Refrain from using your phones in class” your teacher reminded you and you were snapped back into reality

right patterns

coats

you shoved your phone in your bag and tried to focus on the sheet in front of you. for the remaining half hour you faked working on the class assignment and pretending to draw lines and correct them and the second your professor dismissed you, you bolted out of the class and grabbed your phone and checked for any new notifications. There was none and you tried to ignore the soft pang of disappointment that filled your chest.

You did hope she would follow you back or something but that was ridiculous considering how famous she was and by your knowledge she only followed her friends the she hang out with outside her online careers which was a dreadfully low number of people meaning there was no reason for her to follow you

you called june “you won't believe what happened”

“Oh my god. Its about that hot beefy streamer isn’t it?”

“Yes yes it is!”

and you heard screaming on the other line till the mic peaked and muted her out entirely. You gave her a few moments of squealing till she was back on the line ready to question you

“spill. what happened? Did she see your story? did she reply to it?”

“alright no nothing that important but-“

“oh come onnnn”

“BUT!” you interrupted and she waited for you to continue

“but she liked two of my pictures. You know what this means? it means she went through my page and liked two of my pictures June!”

“Wow oh my she will propose to you. She is so in love oh god”

You kept hyping up each other’s delusions all the way to your bus station

“did she text you ? any other notifications?”

you pulled your phone away and checked your page.nothing new so far

“no nothing yet, oh my bus is here”

“alright keep me updated if anything happens”

you hung up and walked inside the vehicle and sat on a plastic seat daydreaming of every possible scenario between you and Abby. However the more you sat the more the high of the excitement wore off and the more you settled back into your usual sorrowful self

ok and? she liked your posts. hell she is probably a player and likes every cute girls posts

you thought and sank further into the seat drowning in the soft music playing from your headphones. you tapped your foot on beat and rested your head against the cold misty windows of the bus. You started lying to yourself pretending this didn’t affect you much and that you'd be over her by tomorrow

You walked back home and tossed your bag carelessly near the shoe rack while taking off your boots and coat in one go leaving them on the floor not caring to tidy up. You went to the sofa and turned on your ps4 feeling excited that you finally had a few hours to dedicate to yourself

You logged into assassin’s creed valhalla ready to continue. This was your third play through and the only game you refused to play on stream. You liked keeping it as a way to comfort yourself and disassociate. You were planning on eventually getting tge ¼ scale Eivor statue that cost the not so humble amount of 1,2k $. Until you were ready to commit to such an expense though you settled for seeing your favorite character in game and left the statue in your wishlist amongst the other figurines you wanted to get

in between enjoying the game you checked the time and remembered today was Abbys turn to stream. You hated to admit that you had purposely made a schedule around hers so that you wouldn’t miss any time she went live, good example being now. You unlocked your phone leaving her stream open waiting for it to start while simultaneously running around in the forest, leisurely exploring the areas in your game

“Hey everyone! Can you all hear me fine? musics not too loud?”

came abbys voice and you snapped your head to your phone looking at her. fuck she was wearing that grey sleevless tank-top again

“Todays stream will be more chill. thought we could just catch up and chat a bit. I ugh had a long day at the gym”

she continued in her usual timid tone. On first look you would never think a woman like her would be so damn shy but she was. Or maybe it was just the camera and audience that caused her to be a bit more chaotic. Its not like you knew what she really was like behind the lens.

“Oh hey Alice nice to see you again!” she said taking her time to greet most of the people viewing her

“Oh we have Nora and Manny in the chat too” she said with a soft laugh. Nora. Oh you knew Nora. Abby usually posted with two women. Both seemed to be friends with her but could equally be suspected to be her girlfriend. One was Nora. They went to the same gym together and often hung out on stream. The second one was Ellie. Another streamer who in the beginning had a very well known hatred towards Abby until one day they miraculously made up and started occasionally hanging out.

not that it mattered to you if either of them was dating Abby…

“Next games? hm..Im not sure. Any suggestions”

you hesitated. You were a silent watcher most days. actually you had never said a damn word other than a donation to her stream and when she called you by your username back then to thank you, you felt so embarrassed that you decided to be one of the lurkers in her stream. Must have been a year ago or so when no one knew you either so there wasn’t a big deal made out of your name being mentioned. You felt stupid for even considering that anyone knew you at all to care if you left a comment. Even in the slim chance that your audience overlapped no one would really bother making a big deal out of it

“Have you tried ac valhalla?” you looked at your comment again and again till deciding to press send and then wait

“yeah not sure about that one..” she seemed to be reading and expanding a bit on which games she considered giving it a go or not. You felt a bit of relief thinking your comment was lost in the sea of others and resumed your game only to pause it shortly after

“Cotton? heh, cute nickname…I haven’t tried any of the assassins creed games but Ill check it out” You heard and your hands started to shake in excitement your ears burning from the heat.

Its not like Abby had any unique accent but the way she said your nickname made you twirl your hair and giggle to yourself. You grabbed your phone again

“oh really? she is?” you heard abby say and you read the comments the excitement turning into plain horror and mortification when you saw people start to recognise you and tease you for recommending the game they had probably seen you continuously post on your stories for a year straight. You exited the stream in shame and gently put your phone on the coffee table continuing your game.

I will end it all for real

this was my last straw

By the time the embarrassment of this minor inconvenience wore off You were in the middle of finishing the Granterbridge arc when you decided to post another story with a short caption regarding the characters. Your phone slowly started going off with notifications with people responding to your story and being in a sour mood you decided to mute it and continue your game till you fell asleep on the couch. The only reason you woke up was because you actually had a really shitty sofa with the thinnest pillows that did nothing to shield you from the hard wooden planks beneath.

You groaned in pain and looked at the screen of your Tv. Your ps4 was on rest mode and at 4.00 am you couldn’t be bothered to do anything about that so you just grabbed your phone and walked to your bedroom quickly going through the unusually vast amount of notifications in case there was something from your friends that you had missed

you stopped in front of your bedroom door and rubbed your eyes. your mind was blank. it was 4.00 am

you read the notification again

staygrounded69: hi

••••

heres my ko-fi tip jar if you enjoy my work 🤍

[ssavinggrace]

☆welcome to the void☆

—𖤐 hello -- I go by multiple names, such as thalia, tori, cyrus, billie, sera, piper, and cobain-

—𖤐 i use they/she/it pronouns, and I'm genderqueer

—𖤐 I'm an demisexual and demiromantic lesbian - im also currently in a relationship

—𖤐 requests for things (such as fics you'd like to see me write or charecters you'd like me to draw) are currently open! feel free to drop any requests, comments, etc. in the ask box!

—𖤐 i mainly post about art, writing, my interests, or friends and my girlfriend

—𖤐 my art and writing blog is @thedead-poetssociety

—𖤐 see more info on my carrd and pronouns page

𖤐—mutuals—𖤐

@percyjackson-post @lostlosersclub @bassguitarinablackt-shirt @runwiththerain @literatureisdying @venux777 @genderfluidsgetguns @enbysgetdaggers @why-am-i-always-hungruy @i-am-an-arson-enthusiast @the-almighty-god @ovenstavern @nepobabyeurydice @thebigqueer @crazyinspirationaldreams @automaticcatsandwich @sparrow-the-tired-lesbian @scifikode @mxnkeydo @drewlover @yourtwistedlies @midnight-thedyke @echo-stimmingrose @my-apollo-gies @music-is-power @a-beautiful-fool @depressedbloggerwrites @her-midas-touch @wistfulenchantress

𖤐—other—𖤐

—𖤐 my current hyperfixations: riordanverse, heartstopper (tv show and comics), across the spider verse, greek mytholgy, and hazbin hote

—𖤐 other things I like: brooklyn nine nine, young sheldon, arcane, modern family, futurama, fourth wing, iron flame, it starts with us, it ends with us, until the shadows lengthen, solitaire, daisy jones and the six, headmasters list, the odyssey, the illiad, the song of achillies, butcher and blackbird, twilight, why would I lie?

—𖤐 this user is: ★

—𖤐 my favorite books: I can't choose.

—𖤐 hobbies: drawing, writing, writing songs, poetry, reading, making jewelry, sculpting with clay, procrastinating, and scrolling on amazon

—𖤐 additional details: can kinda play the guitar, former theater kid, I can speak a basic amount of spanish, and some italian.

—𖤐 collectibles: I collect ducks, pens, bottle tabs, stickers, and jewelry

—𖤐 music: MGK, Post Malone, Childish Gambino, Lana Del Ray, Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, Lil Mabu, Bad Omens, No Resolve, Halestorm, Cavetown, Måneskin, Halsey, Tyler The Creator, Mother Mother, Queen, Waterpark, Rebzyyx, Green Day, TX2, Falling in Reverse, J. Cole, Nirvana, Tom Odell, JVKE, Marilyn Manson, Eminem, Hozier, Baby Fisher, Scene Queen, Bruno Major, Addison Grace, Lincoln, Caroline Carr, Everybody's Worried About Owen, BONES UK, Insane Clown Posse, Lil Nas X, Paramore, NF, The Front Bottoms, Billie Eilish, Conan Gray, Lil Peep, Artic Monkeys, Rainbow Kitten Suprise

[tyungelic]

so i sent cherry a similar ask but im gonna do it backwards for u hehe

thoughts on bad girl tyun corrupting good girl reader ><??

★ a/n: this has been sitting in my inbox for eons sorry for the late reply this was soo fun to write~

warning: fem!taehyun drops the d slur in this

your roommate taehyun knows exactly the kind of girl you are.

you’re always so kind, so sweet, so innocent— at least that’s what others saw on the surface, but she knows the truth.

she’s seen your browser history after all. tsk tsk, shouldn’t have left your laptop open while you went to take a shower. taehyun knows she shouldn’t go around peeking at your stuff, but she just couldn’t resist. you’re so cute and pure, you had to be hiding something. a dark secret, a strange fetish, anything. taehyun wants nothing more than to mess with you. you were always so fun to rile up, so pouty and easy to upset.

taehyun’s eyes go wide when she sees all the lesbian porn in your history. link after link, gifs, videos, and pictures. my god, it’s like you’re some kind of porn addict. no one would ever expect this of sweet little y/n.

so of course she has to let you know that she found out. after all, just the thought of you crying and begging her not to tell anyone about this secret of yours amuses her so much that it turns her on.

you walk into your bedroom and nearly drop your towel in shock when you see taehyun watching one of the videos you were watching just last night.

"taehyun! wh-what are you--"

"-- oh, just watching from your little collection," taehyun says with a sly smile. "you should do something about your chrome history. ever heard of incognito before?"

you rush to your bed and slam the lid of your laptop down, cutting off the salacious moans blaring from your laptop's speakers.

"i didn't give you permission to use my stuff," you say, voice already rising in anger.

"sorry."

bullshit. you both know she isn't sorry.

"what's with you?" you ask. "do you hate me or something? what have i ever done to you?"

“are you a dyke, y/n?” taehyun asked, a sadistic kind of mirth in her voice. you bit your bottom lip, fighting back tears.

"no! i'm not... that. i don't like women that way..."

“i don’t know,” taehyun says in sing-song. “your history is pretty telling. you want a woman to fuck you that badly, hm?”

you gulp, mouth feeling dry and head spinning. you feel so humiliated and you know she’s eating this up. she loves to get a rise out of you and here you are, playing right into her hand.

“do you think about anyone when you watch stuff like that?”

you shake your head, avoiding eye contact with your roommate. one of her hands makes its way to your waist and the other grabs your chin, forcing you to make eye contact.

“wanna try it out with me?”

your knees are starting to go weak. her eyes are so dark, so hypnotizing. does she have any idea of the hold she has on you?

“i need an answer, princess.”

you remove her hand from your face, rage building up inside of you.

"no, not you. never you."

"oh, you don't mean that," taehyun says, feigning offense. "you hate me so much you wanna fuck me, don't you?"

you can't stand this. what the fuck is her problem? why does she always target you? she's such a bitch, so condescending and mean. she's gone too far this time. she knows just how to toy with you and you hate it. you hate her.

and yet...

“y-yes,” you squeak out. “yes, taehyun. please touch me, use me, do whatever you want with me.”

taehyun pulls off your towel, exposing your wet, naked body. she presses her knee between your legs and slowly grinds it against your pussy.

"good girl," she whispers before biting your earlobe. "listen to everything i say and we'll have a great time. okay?"

[mintmatcha]

can u tell us what you didn't like about hazbin hot? I'm not a big musical person so I also tuned out when they started singing lol

Yes lol here's a long ass nonsense rant under the cut.

The creator of the show has done some really racist shit in the past and hides from criticism behind her queerness, but whenever that's brought up, it's immediately shot down and I'm told to separate the art from the artist.

that being said. here's my critique of the show itself.

but hazbin relies so much on material outside of the show. there's things you're supposed to know from twt and tumblr and other sources to make the show make sense. you can't say the show needs to exist in its bubble away from the creator and then make us dependent on the creator for information about the characters.

for me, it's less about "why is a show bad?" and it's more "what makes a show good?". Frankly, I don't think there's anything in this show to make it good.

First off- the show is ugly. The character designs aren't good and often repetitive (suits. same color palettes, same body shapes, etc) The animation itself isn't good either, unfortunately.

We have to stop pretending alastor isn't a crime to character design. He's so ugly. there's almost nothing redeemable about how he looks.

I thought the show itself had one of the weakest plots I've seen. it felt like the first draft of a 14 year old and tried to fit 5 seasons worth of ideas into 8 episodes, so the pacing was just awful. There's no semblance of time passing or real urgency in most episodes because vivziepop was trying to fit in all 50 of her OCs.

example: There was almost no reason for the V's to be in the show-- and the other overlords for that matter. None of them really do anything other than Valentino, who's just there to make Angel's story stronger in this season.

(not to mention Valentino and Vaggie, the series to latinx characters, fall into some fucked up stereotypes)

We are just told this collection of people is strong and scary, but we never really see WHY. It's a waste of time in a crammed show.

That being said, one of the main characters sir pentious had no real weight as a character and had less screen time than some of the nothing characters. Half of alastors time should have been used building him up, including, I dunno. all of episode three. There's no reason to introduce all of those characters other to give alastor the info that an angel has died, right? He's. The radio demon. he should just have some sort of news ability or connections to get him that info. (also that episode makes it really easy to know who killed the angel. there's no mystery to it.)

There are also so many things that simply don't make sense in the show? They are told almost immediately that their plan will not work, so they go to heaven to be told... the same thing.

Vaggie is amazed that angels can be hurt and killed when she is an angel who was hurt and almost killed. (Vaggie and Charlie have a super weak relationship btw. I think it's so poorly done. In a show about sucking dick and cock, it made me roll my eyes that the lesbians have such a pg relationship. how come everyone else gets to be horny other than the lesbians? Because its harder to fetishize? )

the ending was just. awful. Lucifer won the fight without that much of a struggle. It feels like he could have just done that. whenever.

Im going to get murdered for saying this but the songs aren't good, they just have a killer vocal cast. the backing music sucks every time.

[theresattrpgforthat]

I just found this blog and i love it!!! I have a few different questions so to make organizing easier im gonna ask one here and send the others separately so I apologize for the abundance of asks im about to send :D what are some of your favorite past jams or bundles?

THEME: Game Jams and Game Bundles.

Thank you so much! I will probably space out these answers so that other folks have a chance to get their questions answered first. But this one is a pretty fun one to start with.

I’m a sucker for charity bundles, to be sure. My first bundle was the Itch Bundle for Racial Justice and Equality, which was back in 2020. I filtered through all 50 pages and sorted all of the ttrpgs into folders - this was the start of my Itch organization. It also introduced me to quite a few games that showed me the amazing breadth of tabletop games, including Subway Runners, Visigoths vs Mall Goths, Troika, and i’m sorry did you say street magic. An additional recommendation I have from this bundle is Transmission Burst v.1 and Transmission Burst v.2, collections of evocative mini games by UFO Press.

One really impressive bundle was The Bundle for Ukraine, which had a staggering amount of tabletop games in it, including Thirsty Sword Lesbians, Apocalypse Frame, Lutong Banwa, and The Great Soul Train Robbery. I want to give a specific shout out to Bright & Terrible (Atlantean Exiles from a kingdom that fell), as well as Recipe on Kmiydish Paper, a solo gaming experience that fleshes out a world through a single recipe.

If you have bought a lot of charity bundles, I also recommend checking out Bundle Browser, which is a website that helps you sift through games by bundle and tag. I find it super helpful when I'm not sure I have a copy of a game, and clicking on the game brings you to its game page!

Now, let's talk about game jams. The Emotional Mecha Jam was a game jam in the beginning of 2019 that explore the depth of emotions that exist in the mecha genre. This jam inspired works such as A Long Night in the Mech Bay, All My Exes are in Mechsuits, and Breakup on Re-Entry. You should absolutely check this jam out.

In 2021, there was a jam called Applied Hope: The Solarpunk and Utopias Jam. I’ve talked about this jam recently, and it’s very very good. I love the theory and conversations sparked in this jam - the goal was to dream of possible worlds - not perfect ones, but ones that were brighter, worlds that could are meant to increase our capacity for joy. I’ve talked about a number of games here before, including subconscious_Routine, Waxworm, and After the World Drowned. I’m also intrigued by Scraps, which won the award for Best Solarpunk DIY game.

The BIPOC Vamp Jam was also a lot of fun! It was a jam that ran in 2021 and asked Black, Indigenous and Creators of Colour to submit their vampire games, in an effort to look at vampires through a different lens. I’ve talked about Vamp Camp and Bloodbeam Badlands before, but I’m also stoked about The Vamp is Dust, (a hack of The Witch is Dead), as well as Project: Day Breaker (Vampires in space!).

Some of my favourite jams are jams that are focused on a specific system. The What’s So Cool About Jam is one of those. It is a super simple system, and the jam is what introduced me to the WSCA ruleset, which is pretty light-weight system that can be translated to a lot of settings. I’ve personally been interested in What is So Cool About Sky Pirates, as well as What’s So Scary About Dinosaurs?.

Titanomachy also has a solid history of good game jams, as evidence by their first and second Caltrop Core jams. Caltrop Core has gotten some pretty big attention, because it’s so easy to hack! This can be seen in in HexFall, which is also by Lex, as well as SW//NG by @farmergadda (emotional superheroes), and Last Hope (dark magical girls). I’m also interested in The Dreaded & The Deep (nautical horror) and The Dying of the Light (a city struggling in the darkness).

[liquidstar]

Ok so, I have only ever watched one episode of Adventure Time, and it was on a hotel room TV, in terrible hindi dub, and I barely remember it on account of being 10(?) but it horrified me.

I remember the MCs trying to get Ice King a girlfriend or something, but he keeps being a gross asshole so they take him to a lake and point at some swans to try and explain love to him. They point to two swans kissing like ':D' and he's like 'ewww' and then the male swan suCKS IN AND EATS THE FEMALE and IK's like ':)))' while the boys stare in horror.

IDR how the episode ended or how much I watched, but I remember thinking 'wow american cartoons are hardcore. I'm sticking to pirated pokemon from now on.'

And you are telling me that show had lesbians in it leter????

oh my god im so sorry but imagining you watching that swan scene as a 10 year old is so fucking funny, i can understand why you stuck with pirated pokemon LOL

adventure time is absolutely very fucked up in a lot of different ways. the early seasons leaned into that type of absurd shit you just described a lot more especially. while the later ones actually started getting more existential and building on the worlds lore.

there wasnt exactly a focused plot, per say. i mean, there was, but it wasnt something methodical and planned out, it was played by ear. and i think it really worked. the way they did it turned out a really cool magic system (based on the idea that reality is just collective perception, and magic users are aware of this and can manipulate perception ergo reality. but the more cosmic knowledge you have the more insane or depressed you become etc especially if youre mortal), and also cool world building (it takes place in a post apocalypse after a nuclear war, now far into the future the face of the earth has completely changed but the horrors unleashed still impact it today), and also a lot of really amazing themes (the world is always changing and nothing is ever permanent, but no matter how things change things also stay the same, in a different way. especially where bonds and love are concerned. everything stays.)

and YEAH there are lesbians (i mean i always hc marcy as bi but still). and they also come from the shows improvisational nature. theres a lot of genuinely really amazing relationships and plotpoints born out of that to me. like, as the show starts to get a lot more thematically dense later on it can seem like a weird shift. some ppl say it got pretentious over time bc its not as goofy (its still pretty goofy lol), but i think it worked... like... perfectly.

because its a coming of age story where the main character actually ages, it actually feels so right that the world around him begins to seem different too. it makes sense that when he was 12 we were doing stupid goofy adventures, when he was 15 we were watching him deal with a lot of really fucked up trauma, and when he was 17 we watched him learn to grow as a person who thinks beyond simple terms of good and evil.

i know im tottaaallly rambling at this point but theres really an insane amount to talk about with adventure time. the timeline alone is ridiculous. but mostly i think my passion comes down to the fact that i was also growing up with the story, always around the same age as the mc going through similar stuff... even now, the story is focusing on a depressed 20-something trying to find whimsy in her life again. and technically the last episode timeline-wise is about accepting death lol

so like idk how exactly id recommend it to a new viewer, its really possible that a lot of ppl wont be able to really tolerate the early seasons as adults (i mean, i think theyre charming, but i have nostalgia goggles lol). that being said i think that its a series totally worth a shot for everyone... eventually. if it sounds interesting you just gotta accept the goofiness at first and trust that youre in for something wild in a totally different way later on. and totally unique and cool and special in a way nothing else has really been able to capture for me since.

TL;DR: no yeah the show was incredibly fucked up and that swan did eat that other swan. but it does have themes and also lesbians.

[phopollo]

Yknow what nobody asked for but I'm going to share anyways?

A collection of drawings I should definitely redraw, in order of when I drew them so you know how old they are, but im scared to start looking more than 2 years ago

(Unfinished) Comic about how General Yunan is a fucking WAR VETERAN, and probably TRAUMATIZED, and how much of a monster she must have appeared like to Lady Olivia if they hadn't met before that (Dec 17, 2021)

Lesbian triforce of power (Dec 28, 2021)

"Funny, thars what he thought of her" (March 6, 2022)

All hail the Clockwork King (March 10, 2022)

Nasty! Majesty! (April 4, 2022)

Agents vs Idols (April 6, 2022)

WE WERE SO ROBBED (April 10, 2022)

This specific panel from an unfinished comic (May 30, 2022)

Lesbianism (July 17, 2022) ((I DREW THIS EXACTLY 20 DAYS BEFORE THE ZAKURO EPISODE WAS RELEASED, I HAD NO IDEA))

There's totally more, but I've run out of room for images and been procrastinating homework, maybe I'll add on to this later

Also shoutout to anyone who remembers any of these, because a couple of these made some rounds in their respective fandom's spaces

[mugeesworld]

One Piece Fans Green & Red Flags!!

I seen someone do this on tiktok and thought I would do some of my takes😋 this is as a joke so don't take it to heart

Also these are HELLA specific so don't ask how I know I just do ok

Green

The one piece fans that are still in alabaster and instead of watching one piece they are scrolling on the tiktok # of it. +extra points if you're already doing fanart of them.

non binary luffy/chopper fans (quite silly people I enjoy your company. You probably have a saved collection of videos of cats with silly sounds. Don't lie to me ik you do)

Asexual Zoro and luffy fans

Platonic Nami and luffy shippers (ya know like brother sister dynamic)

Female plus size sanji fans (cough cough me. But I've seen all y'all out their. You freaky bitches)

Usopp fans (enough said)

People that love the usopp and Nami bestie duo.

Dadan fans (period)

People that make fanart of zoro and chopper being cute

People that draw robin with that one nose shape and also draw her like that one lady from criminal minds.

FROBIN SHIPPERS (RAHHHHH🔥🔥⁉️⁉️⁉️🗣️🗣️)

Trans men Franky fans (you started wearing button ups over t-shirts huh. Elite style and funny as hell)

Female Franky shippers (Bless y'all. Y'all my favs probably. Making the best edits I swear. Probably looking for a man's like Franky cause you kin robin)

LESBIAN NAMI FANS (PLEASE LOVE ME ALL Y'ALLS COSPLAYS BE EATING SO HARD BABES)

Nami x Vivi shippers (yeah😋)

Introverted female robin fans (hit my line)

Female buggy fans

Trans men zoro fans

FEMALE OR TRANS MASC WHITEBEARD STAN'S (very rare to come across. Y'all great but y'all need to heal your dad issues)

People that don't leave out Franky, jinbei, and brook in writing stuff

People that write for Franky in general.(he needs more love)

Marco simps (brave soliders right here. You really picked that mf? Yeah me you. IT'S ABOUT PERSONALITY OK???)

Sanji fans that actually find his training arc fun and not gross

Female Mihawk stans (naughty gal😼 you like them cold)

You know what?! Any trans masc one piece fan that picked a character and was like. Yep! He's literally me! Im literally him!

Jinbei fans (you guys are either sweethearts or middle school boys(the mean kind)

Brook fans that do fanart. (See cause y'all gonna eat every time)

Bon clay fans that actually like him and don't just make fun of him.

I forgot his name. Umm Coby? I think? Yeah Coby fans.

Rayleigh simps (insert sound *I'm so hungry I could eat at Arby's! She really is hungry!* Me too girl me too.)

Same for garp ^

The people that been making the shanks love actions edits 😋

People that make corecore/hopecore edits of one piece

Ik I've said it a bunch but the drawing community that has been carrying the one piece fandom on tiktok. (Ty for blessing us)

Plus size one piece fans +points if you cosplay

That hot old lady that took chopper in and the hot old lady with Rayleigh fans. (Those two would be such good friends and serve some major cunt. Drawers! Get to it you know what to do.)

Red

Sanji and zoro fans that ARE CONSTANTLY BICKERING IN COMMENT SECTIONS ABOUT POWER LEVELS AND BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH SHUT UP

People that feel the need to tell sanji fans about Fishman Island every chance they get as if other characters don't have their red flags. I said it.

That one person in every comment section with a luffy profile pics saying the most absolutely rude or embarrassing thing ever like "post the on IG reels" (you are immature and not in a good way like luffy)

Zoro fans that's also like Patrick Bateman for the wrong reason

"Yamato is a woman" ("we'll actually Oda said 🤓" EHHHHHHHH *family Feud buzzered noise.* GET OUT)

People that shit on the one piece live action cast. (specifically the ones complaining about nami and her sister. BOY I OTTA!)

People that talk shit about big mom just cause she fat. Like babes so is your mom....

People that still watch one piece and try to say how much they love it but are racist, homophobic, transphobic. When one of the biggest things for luffy is to not be judgemental. You are not him⁉️🗣️ you are a asssss

Akianu fans.

MOST black beard fans (I ain't forgiving no one for what he did to whitebeard I'm not hearing it)

"Zoro would kill the whole crew for luffy🤓" would you kill your whole friend group/family for your best friend/mom or dad..... I didn't think so.

People that hate on English dub watchers. I'm a slow reader y'all. Plus it's hella funny.

People that weren't at least a little mad about GARPS actions in marine ford.

Nami x luffy. Robin x Law. And robin x zoro shippers. Also Any gross illegal ones with gross age gaps.

Thats all I can think of right now!

[anti--transid]

{ ‘ How did being a radqueer affect me? ’ }

[pt: { ‘ How did being a radqueer affect me? ’ } /end pt]

Hi Hello Greetings, I am Truffle/Chocerie, I am a former radqueer who ran the blogs @/transm4sc, @/daughterwife, @/sc3n3-v4mp1r3 (e, e, a, i, e)

I'm here to educate folks on how being a radqueer had an extremely negative effect on me and my collective.

Trigger warning for: paranoid meltdowns, mental breakdowns, paranoia, and other things

I was a radqueer for around twoish years, possibly three, I was more active on radqueer-tumblr but was also part of a few radqueer discord servers, mainly RadDates, RadPawzz, and Transid Archive to name a few.

Starting with the more "tame" things, being radqueer caused me to distance myself from my best friend, thankfully after escaping the community, I managed to become close with them once again.

I also had a "us vs them" mentality that is very heavily forced upon every radqueer, I thought that only radqueers would accept me for being a minor with personality disorders and for being an m-spec lesbian, I was wrong, I have found a lovely community on MOGAIblr that accepts me for who I am.

The radqueer community treated everything like a possible transid or paraphilia, stuff like 'oh you have a crush on your teacher? You must be an AAM, only radqueers will accept you!', or 'oh you're not a traumagenic system? You must be transplural, only radqueers will accept you!' And other vile things.

Onto the more heavier, darker things.

Those will be under the cut, read with caution darlings..

Tw: 'consang'/incest, underage sex work, paranoia, pedophilia, beastiality,

The radqueer community groomed me into sending nsfw texts and images to older people and encouraged me to become an underage sex worker.

I was so violently paranoid towards when I left the community that I literally had to take a month long break from discord to stop being terrified of my own fucking breathing.

[pt: own fucking breathing /end pt]

The radqueer community groomed me into flirting and being in an in system consang "relationship" with an alter who I considered my mom/older sister who was 27, for context, I as an alter, am a 14-17 age shifter, that relationship went on for about a year..

I'm surpised I was not hospitalized for how violently paranoid I was, I suffered intrusive thoughts so bad I had to force myself to dissociate so I didn't have a completely breakdown, the radqueer community tried to encourage me to act on my intrusive thoughts/tried to make me think that my intrusive thoughts weren't "that bad".

The radqueer community tried to convince me I was "transDPD" because I exhibit DPD symptoms, they also tried to convince me I was "transorientation to lesbian!1!" even though Im not, Im literally just a lesbian.

If you still think that the radqueer community isn't "that bad", I beg you to take a step back and realize how horrible that community is, I have other former radqueers who have told me about the horrorifying things they witnessed.

Including but not limited to: literally sharing beastiality films, threats towards antis, encouragement of literal pedophilia, encouragement of minors to participate in kink with adults and other things.

[endenope]

please do more fem haikaveh as a lesbian it is my duty to beg you to do more fem haikaveh

also: personal hc ofc but fem!haitham is also buff and big as shit. she has ABS and BICEPS. still a bottom tho

another personal hc: fem!kaveh has a collection of the most aesthetically pleasings straps and toys and lingerie designs. were they super expensive and probably not a good thing to buy while broke? yeah. is it worth it for alhaitham's (either male or fem) reaction? yes <3

i absolutely will draw more fem kavetham 💕 i started to draw more but im at work rn.....later tho......ill continue...heheh.... (also next week im off work for courses so more time to draw-)

also we def have the same brain there anon!!! i also hc haitham as a big lady with gorgeous biceps and nice thighs and hips and good muscle while kaveh is all soft. and kaveh def owns beautiful lingerie (making her look like a goddess) and fancy toys and stuff while haitham def wears more comfy simple underwear (when kaveh gets her to wear sexy dark lingerie one night, its over for the architect)

i wanna share so many more hcs and thoughts on them but my break is about to end gahhh but yea ill def draw more <3

[bu11seye]

knowing your partner can potentially make writing together a lot easier.

basics

✧ NAME: mimi .

✧ PRONOUNS: she/they

✧  SEXUALITY: lesbian w terrible comphet

✧  TAKEN OR SINGLE: single .

three facts

✧ my favorite bands are 5 seconds of summer , bts & tomorrow x together . i'm a serial boyband hopper and have been since i was like 7 starting with the jonas brothers .

✧ i collect dolls and dragon figurines .

✧ i'm a horror fanatic, specifically horror romance .

experience

✧   HOW LONG (MONTHS / YEARS?): since i was 11, so 13ish years .

✧   PLATFORMS YOU’VE USED: tumblr, twitter, q, discord .

✧   BEST EXPERIENCE: i've met my best friend through roleplaying , it's been ten years !

muse preferences

✧   FEMALE OR MALE: i don't have a preference . as of lately i like writing female muses after writing men for a bit .

✧  FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT: i love angst specifically arguments . they're my favorite kinds of threads LOL. but i also like borderline smut responses and flirty threads i think they're fun . i like it all !

✧   PLOTS OR MEMES: plots . i love memes once the plot is established though ! i do tend to hoard them and then get stressed about hoarding them rip

✧   LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: unfortunately i love long responses but medium responses are also fine ! i only like shorter ones when the scene doesn't give much wiggle room.

✧   BEST TIME TO WRITE: usually 2/3am my brain is doing backflips so i'm writing then

✧ ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S): short answer no long answer a little bit because i tend to put myself in odd areas of my characterizations and if we talk one on one for a long period of time , usually you can pinpoint certain quirks i have and preferences . every single aspect of a character is added with a reason and i can track back why i added this character trait . i'm very thorough with everything to the point where i spend hours thinking about and researching and making sure i know my characters inside and out and know their responses to any and everything . specifically jessie with how much work and time i've put into her . so while she's not like me personality wise, there are bits of me in her .

as for canon muses not at all. i write caroline & jeremy from the vampire diaries . caroline's a muse im still trying to find a voice for but i adore so much that i'm trying to do a character deep dive and jeremy is the bane of my existence but i know him like the back of my hand . he is the gift that i keep trying to return but he keeps coming back . i'm nothing like that man and frankly i hate him LOL

tagged by @salvatoraes

tagging @6ellas & whoever else wants to <3

[tlouxobsessed]

“College Friends”

Abby x Ellie

Summary - Abby Anderson is starting College, she meets her new roommate. They suddenly have a spark, a connection like no other.

——————————————————

i packed my last few shirts into the brown boxes my dad left on my bed. i walked over to my bedroom door reading the sign i had made when i was nine. "abby's room stay out or else..."

i walked over carrying out the last few boxes, packing them into my car. i sat down in the drivers seat clutching the wheel tightly while putting my head back onto the dead rest letting out a sigh of relief.

i was finally all packed and ready to start heading to college, i hadn't gotten my dorm assigned yet. i knew once i got there i'd see a few people from the meet and greet last week. i couldn't get one girl out of my mind weirdly enough.

she was a few inches shorter than me, auburn hair, up to her shoulders a little above. greenish-bluish eyes. freckles, a tat on her forearm. she was wearing a flannel and some old looking jeans. some black dirty converse and had a cocky smile. she was hot. but i didn't bother talking to her much. until i went over to the table assigned where you apply for dorms. i signed and i had seen her signing right before me.

"ellie williams" the paper yelled back at me.

ellie? what a cute name.

i couldn't really stop thinking about her. anyways i stopped at my nearby subway to quickly get some lunch before i was on the road. i was honestly pretty exhausted after today. i was so ready to plop into my new bed and not move for hours.

i pulled into the spot where my dorm was apparently located. i approached the large double doors expected the usual crowd, the group of diverse people.

the usual preppy white girls, jocks, smart people that actually care about their grades. frat boys, frat girls ya'know? them. some lesbians here and there but nothing crazy.

i walked over to the front desk ringing the bell, my finger tips sweaty sticking to the top of the copper material. "hi hun, first and last name?" i looked at the woman at the front desk studying her. she was around 5'2, southern accent. short brown hair laying just above her shoulders. her crystal blue eyes screaming at me and her pencil thin eyebrows sharp enough to slice through the thick awkwardness of this moment.

"oh sorry...abby anderson." i finally spat out, touching my hand to my head wiping off the beads of sweat that had collected across my forehead.

"room 2204, your roommate should already be there. there are some carts if you'd like to help carry up your stuff. none of those fancy hotel ones, just wooden and plastic ones love." i thanked the woman.

i put my four small boxes, two backpack fulls and a couple pairs of shoes i brought into the grey plastic bin. i pressed the number "6" on the elevator brining me up. the silence of the elevator giving me an uneasy feeling.

i quickly made my way into my door, holding my key tightly in my hand slipping it into the key hole. i walked in to find just some boxes and two trash bags. i decided not to be a weirdo and mind my own business.

i unpacked into my small brown dresser and put some plain white and grey striped bedding onto my small twin sided bed. once unpacked i laid upon the bed immediately drifting into some sort of sleep.

"oh shit sorry" the sound of the door slamming shut woke me immediately. i jumped up clutching my chest then brushing it off once i saw the girl from the meet and great.

her short auburn hair looking perfectly smooth, hee soft plump lips poking out just enough. her green eyes staring into mine as i snapped back into reality.

"oh you're all good, i'm abby- you?" i asked puzzled on whether to add that i think i had seen her prior to this awkward encounter.

"well hey abby, im ellie..williams. i guess we're roommates?" i nodded then stood up stretching. the hem of my shirt lifting a little above my bellybutton as i raised my arms into the hair yawing.

i walked over to the door locking it so i could get settled for the night. we had a small stove, counter top, sink and microwave. a toaster too that i had brought from home. we had a small bathroom as well, this college was more upper class, i was asked if i'd like the "mini house option" and of course i chose this one. the shower could fit two people comfortable if they squeezed together, a toilet and a smaller sink. nothing crazy but just enough for me and my roomie.

"are you stayin' in for the night?" ellie asked me looking over to the front door where i was standing.

"oh yeah i am, you?"

"yeah me too, what are you majoring in?" she asked me.

"oh um honestly i wanted to be in veterinary, well i am. i like animals and taking care of them so- i mean why not ha" i chuckled awkwardly touching the back of my neck.

she smiled back then replying, "i'm majoring in english arts, i enjoying playing music and drawing. shit like that ya'know?"

i nodded then grabbing a towel out of one of my boxes.

"hey ellie i brought 10 or so towel and a few cloths, you can use some if you'd like. i'm gonna go shower now but see ya after? we can talk more if you aren't already knocked." i walked over to the bathroom opening the door then shutting it. my heart beating a mile per minute. she was insanely hot. the way she smirked at me slyly when i shut the door.

i opened it once i was done, the hot steam rushing into the much colder room. i had on a pair of navy blue boxers and a black wife beater. i didn't bother having a sports bra on, i was going to bed so i didn't see a point. i hopped into bed, quickly glancing over at the very concentrated ellie. she was grilling at her phone, her brow furrowed in anger and exhaustion.

"you good?" i asked puzzled. she jumped not realizing i came out of the bathroom because of the darkness from the room. the room only lit by the slight moonlight peaking in from behind the blackout curtain i had put up.

"oh ya uh my girlfriend she's just being insane and weird" she replied going mute again.

i decided we weren't close enough for me to ask so i decided to leave things off on a positive note.

"i'm sorry, if you ever wanna like talk about it i'm uh here?" i said not meaning to add a question mark at the end of that sentence. i felt my face flush with a bright red palming my face once again.

"thanks abby, could i have your number? ya'know in case i'm ever locked out ha." she replied. i responded giving her it putting a contact into my phone.

"ellie williams dorm girl" i put making me laugh a little.

i turned over facing the wall, she has a girlfriend? i wonder how long they'd been together? whatever abby just go to bed i said to myself as i drifted off into a deep sleep.

I glanced over at the empty bed on the opposite side of the room, she was gone? maybe she had class. I dunno, not gonna put too much thought into it I reassured myself. I stumbled up, smashing my finger against the "shut off" button on my phone silencing the blaring alarm. 

My phone read "7:55" I knew I had to be quick, my first class started at 10:15 but I'd like to grab some breakfast and shit before going there. It was a three hour long block so I was going to become restless. I figured I'd come home around 1:30ish and hit the gym, hopefully I'd see Ellie at one point. I threw on a white T-shirt, some mildly ripped whitewashed jeans and my air forces. My hair looks like shit so I just braided it and laid it on my right shoulder. 

I picked up my backpack throwing it over my shoulders, it was a clothy material, my dad got me it when he found out I was going all the way to California from Seattle. My pack was brown and quite large, I could fit a good two full sized winter coats comfortably. I made sure I had everything I needed. 

"Okay Abby let's see wallet, keys, car keys, books, pencils, pens-" I looked over to see the door opening. It was Ellie and another girl, the girl was maybe two inches shorter than Ellie. She had brown eyes and short black hair. Maybe this is the girlfriend? I wondered as the two rambled before Ellie noticing my presence. "oh sorry abby, I thought you'd be gone by now" she replied with a slight smile out of embarrassment. The shorter girl took a step towards me moving Ellie out of the way, she held out her hand waiting for me to take it back. "Well hello, I'm Cat, Ellie's girlfriend. You must be the "roomie." She replied looking a little flustered. "uh yeah sorry guys but I got to go, I have class at 10, see ya later though?" I said awkwardly releasing my hand away from Cat's and heading towards the door. I shut it behind me letting out a sign of relief. I hurried into my car and started making my way to the nearest Cumberland Farms. 

~ Ellie point of view ~ 

I shook my head out of aggravation towards Cat. "Are you fuckin' happy now?" I asked practically yelling at her. "You didn't tell me she was MASCULINE. You had me thinking you were sharing a room with some pretty, lil' fem." Cat replied chuckling to herself. "Jesus Cat, even if she was some "pretty little fem" I wouldn' do that to you." I said Immediately embarrassed for being soft. "Aw El that's sweet, but I gotta get going, love you." She said her goodbyes kissing my on the cheek and leaving the room. I honestly didn't mind Abby, maybe I'd invite her to Jesse and Dina's party? She doesn't seem to have many friends, or bitches. Maybe she'd find somebody, ya'know what? lemme just go for it. I pulled out my phone not thinking it through completely. 

me - hey do u wanna go to my friends party tn? 

I pressed send quickly glancing at the time "10:35" shit she's already in class that's why she isn't answerin-

abby - sure! what time?

Oh she is able to answer? anyways I picked up my phone opening the chat right away, I began typing. 

me - 8 u can ride w me and cat tho if u want

she sent back a thumbs up emoji I laughed at the stupid character then walked over to her stack of towels grabbing one. I undressed and stepped into the shower feeling the hot water running down the peak of my back, my body arching when the hot liquid hit it. I finished washing up then threw on some sweats and a black sweatshirt I was assuming is Jesse's then laying down finally I was able to get some sleep. 

~later on~

I woke up to some mumbling, I looked over at Abby who was wearing a dark grey button up and some black jeans, her hair was down and she had on a backwards hat on. I kept staring until she looked back at me in the mirror catching my stares. "you should probably get ready, it's already 6:45" she said replying to my stares. "oh yeah hah" I stood up stretching my arms, I waddled over to my dresser grabbing out a reddish flannel, a white wife beater and some ripped jeans. I grabbed my clothes about to reach the hem of my shirt until I realized Abby was right there. I picked up my clothes carrying them into the bathroom. I threw them on along with some white socks. I looked into the mirror at my mess of a hair. I decided on leaving it down with just a small amount of it in a bun. I slipped my shoes on, grabbed my keys and looked over at Abby who had been sitting on her bed texting somebody. 

"Who ya textin'?" I asked not even realizing what I said until after the words had spurted out of my mouth like vomit. She looked up at me the smile fading, "Oh my friend Lev." Whose Lev I wondered. "Ready?" I asked looking at Abby who nodded in return. We got into my car, my aux connected immediately. Or Nah started blasting. 

"Do you like the way I flick my tongue or nah?" I bursted out laughing pressing the shuffle button on my phone.  "Oh um" Abby said holding up a pare of purple panties, she pinched the top of them holding them away from her. I laughed and grabbed them out of her hand, tossing them into the back seat. "Sorry HA." 

"So no Cat?" Abby asked after five minutes of deadly silence. I glanced in my rearview mirror checking for cars then continuing to pass. "Nah she wanted to go with some of her friends, I don't really like her friends but honestly we haven't been doing that great together either ya'know?" Abby agreed then I had to ask the question. "Have you ever dated somebody before?" I asked biting down on my tongue from embarrassment. "yeah I fucked a few girls, a guy or two but I dunno guys aren't really my thing. The only for real relationship I've been in was with this girl and uh it didn't end too well so hookups and one nightstands have been my thing for two years." The tension in the car became thick, I choked down a cough them decided to pry a little more. "What was her name?" Abby paused not saying anything. "Fuck Ellie" I cursed myself. "Sorry was that too much-" "no, It's fine, her name was Sam. How about you? any girls besides Cat?" Abby replied. I breathe out a sigh of relief knowing I didn't fuck anything up any more. "Uh no, I had a crush on one of my old friends Riley, fucked with a few girls here and there but nah. Cat was my first for the most part ha" I chuckled as we pulled up to Jesse's house. 

Jesse and Dina had been together since we were just 14, she loves him, he loves her. They made me believe in love. Dina is 20 and Jesse is 21. I'm 19. They live together while both going to college, the same one I go to. We all hangout a lot and they throw parties every other week. I love my friend's, they don't live too far. Maybe like 10-15 minutes away. Thankfully the car ride was shirt but felt like eternity because of the awkwardness. 

We walked into the house, lots of people already there. I walked over to Dina and Jesse. "hey guys! this is my roomie Abby" I said smiling and gesturing towards her. "well helloooo there" Dina said with a flirtatious smirk. "Uh hey what's up guys?  hah" Abby touched the back of her neck nervously and a little uncomfortable with Dina's full on flirting. "sorry Abby don't mind Dina, she's drunk and flirts with everybody. I'm Jesse" He held out his hand waiting for her ti shake it. "I'm gonna go grab something to drink, want anything Ab?" I asked. The muscular girl turned her head towards me, her muscle flexing in the darken lighting, was she always that attractive? I asked myself. 

~ Abby Point of view ~

"Hello?? Ellie? I said yes" I replied watching her stare into space, I looked behind me checking to make sure she wasn't looking at somebody else but sure enough it was me. "sorry what do you want?" Ellie's toned dried once she came out from her trance, her sudden demeanor towards me turned sour. I bit down on my tongue in an attempt to keep myself from letting tears roll. I wasn't super sensitive but weirdly enough for her I was. I choked my tears down in an effort to pull myself together. "uh whatever just get me something strong" I replied turning away. I searched around the room looking for a possible hookup for the night. A girl caught my eye, she was around 5'7 a nice height. She had curlyish dark brown hair that fell right above her breasts. She was wearing a small tight black skirt, a small purple shirt with thin spaghetti straps. She was pretty, I couldn't exactly see her eye color, all I saw was the side of her. She had a cute button nose, plump lips and a pretty smile. Her eyebrows were perfectly shaped. 

I walked over to the group near her, I heard her laughing. Even her laugh was cute, I walked closer to the cute girl, her friends walked away getting the hint that I was checking her out. "Hey, can I get you a drink?" I asked giving a small smirk after the quick attempt of a flirt. She turned to me, her cute button nose covered in freckles, her dark brown eyes bringing out the freckles. "Well hello there, you may, but could I get a name first?" The pretty girl asked me. "Abby, and you?" I returned. "Maya, can I ask you a question Ms.Abby?" she puzzled. "Yes shoot it." "What is a hot girl like you doing all alone, single I'm assuming, at a college party?" I chuckled at the stupid questions. "Well Maya I am single, very much. And my roomie invited me here." "Nice, now where's my drink?" Maya asked. We chatted the night away. Nothing too sexual, mostly just some flirting, talking about majors, jobs, schools, friends, then I decided to ask a more intriguing question. At this point the alcohol was speaking for me. "Can I get your number Ms.Maya?" I asked. "You may" She tore off a piece of red napkin scribbling down a number. I looked around searching for my ride before I felt someone suddenly pulling on me. "wanna dance?" Maya asked, I now knew the alcohol was speaking for her as well. 

Maya pulled me onto the dance floor, she guided my hands towards her hips. I held onto her as she turned around and starting moving her hips in a way I had never seen no other woman do before. I felt my face go bright red as she put her hands onto my chest dragging them down, she went down slowly then got back up. She moved closer putting her hands on my face pressing her lips against mine. She slipped her tongue into my mouth swirling it with mine, they intertwined, in sync we both kissed each other back passionately until I felt a hand on my shoulder.

I turned around to see Ellie, she was bright red. She looked furious. "It's time to head out Abby." I pulled away from Maya. "I'll text you!" I drunkingly slurred my words as Ellie dragged me away from Maya. I felt Ellie lead me into the car sitting me down pulling the car out of park and driving us back home. 

The tension was so thick I could cut it with a knife. "What the fuck Abby? I bring you to one of my friend parties and you're all over some bitch?" my mouth fell open. "What the FUCK ELLIE. YOU CANNOT BE MAD AT ME WHEN YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND-" She pulled over the car. 

We were now sitting two blocks away from the dorms, she pulled into a parking lot making sure the car was out of sight. Ellie leaned over and pull my face towards her, looking down to my bottom lip then up to meeting my gaze. She pushed her lips against mine, our face's intertwine in usion. I wrapped one of my hands around Ellie's neck releasing a slight moan. I smirked then pulling away from the kiss gesturing to Ellie to take her clothes off. 

She took her shirt off, we both headed to the back seat now. I pulled off the now stained white T I had put on under my grey button up. We both continued to swap spit until I reached my hand down further. My hand brushing against her warm thigh caused a slight chill to go down Ellie's spine, I watch as she tingled at the sudden wave of cold. I slipped my fingers past her underwear. She grabbed my hand before I could continue. "No" she said quickly pushing my arm away, flipping me up onto the back seat so I was now laying down. The auburn haired girl pushed my legs apart. She pulled my jeans then boxers off. She quickly slipped a finger in. 

Ellie was edging me, she slid it in then out but slighly pressed up leaving me wanting and needing more. "Ellie please" I moaned. "please what?" She asked looked up at me. "fuck me Ellie." She finally stuck her two fingers in completely. A moan escaping my mouth as I couldn't help it. my heart was racing. She quicken the pace then adding her tongue into the equation.She went faster and faster until I felt a knot forming in my stomach. I could see my hot juices streaming down her fingers onto her hand. I released and let out a loud moan gripping Ellie's head in the process. 

"jesus Ellie" I said as she pulled her fingers out and rested them on her tongue licking off any of my excess. "What about cat?" I asked.

"Uhh I dunno ha." Ellie said as she pressed "shuffle" on her phone. 

"...ahha i'm smoke this joint then-" 

we both looked at each other laughing. 

---------------

I hope you guys enjoyed this ;) This is my story off of wattpad but I know a lot of people don’t have it. I’ll probably be posting more of my one shots Ellie x Abby on here for all you Ellab shippers :) Have a great day loves

[luveline]

hi jade ^^ this might be a little weird and feel free to not answer but i was wondering if you have any advice against feeling lonely and blue? i recently moved in my new flat for my last year of uni and since im living by myself, im finding im overthinking a lot since i have a lot of free time and not many friends as im not very approachable despite trying - ive been reading your fics in the meantime to stave off this feeling and theyre providing me sm comfort, your sad loser readers always feel so fitting so thank you for sharing them w us!!

Well sometimes gorgeous I don't think there is a way to escape that feeling! Which sucks, but I hope you aren't too hard on yourself, you know! I think that loneliness can be just like hunger where you need to eat or you need to spend time with others to make it go away, and sometimes you can't and that's not your fault! When I'm feeling lonely and blue I try to spend some time chatting to a friend or my sisters but I know that's not always possible either, so there's other stuff! It's good to have a hobby, something intricate that you can be proud of, like I think having a craft you can gain skill in can be really good for you, but there's definitely other things to occupy you if that's not your thing, like for example card collecting or jigsaws and stuff like that.

I'm a huge overthinker I make myself sick worrying about stuff, and jigsaws genuinely saved me a few months ago! It's hard to think about anything else when you're doing a puzzle. There are even puzzles you can get that are 3D, but for free you can do them on your phone. It's super low pressure because you can't make too many mistakes but not repetitive enough to let you think about other things too much. There's also bracelet making, cross stitch, alpha bracelet/key chain making, these are all things that you have to pay attention or you'll mess up, so it stops you from overthinking about other things.

If you're blue I'm a big believer of treating yourself exactly how you'd treat a friend, a partner, or a loved one. It's easy to blame your loneliness on yourself. Maybe if you were more approachable, you'd have more friends, you'd feel less lonely —but being approachable isn't something you have complete control over, imo. Obviously there are things you can do to be friendly, but there's no shame at all in being introverted or finding it hard to connect with people, it just isn't as easy for some as it is for others. And sometimes making friends can STILL leave you lonely, which is basically my big long way of saying that I hope you're being nice to yourself about how you're feeling. And what I'm about to say is stolen from a friend, but sometimes you need to take care of yourself to feel better, like making sure you're eating well, sleeping if you can. Also! This might sound silly but I read a graphic novel /manga called My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness and something she did to feel better was again to take care of herself, like making sure none of her underwear had holes, and to stay clean and well presented. I'm not sure if that's good advice because maybe you can't afford to buy new underwear or maybe you have all the clothes you need, but when I started to do that and to look after myself with small steps, it did make me feel better. I worry that shame and loneliness are hand in hand (like, I'm lonely because I deserve to be) because they feed into each other, so definitely take care of yourself if you can!

There's also silly stuff you can do to immediately feel better, like getting up for stretches, a loud burst of karaoke, chocolate. Sometimes I feel better by watching a movie I loved when I was a kid, or reading bits of old books. I also think there's no shame in doing 'lame' stuff like pretending you're in a YouTube video or experimenting with stupid stuff you've never done before, like Bob Ross tutorials and baking and all that stuff. I think sometimes I feel lonely because I feel as though I'm bad company to myself, so if you can manage to be kind to yourself and keep an open mind, you'll feel better sometimes!

Sometimes though it's literally impossible to not feel blue and lonely, and if you feel like for days at a time you can't shake that feeling I would genuinely suggest getting help and reaching out. There's a crisis text line in the UK called SHOUT, and if you can wait the long waiting times in the evenings, they're a good listening ear! I've spoken to people a few times that way when I felt like my anxiety was going to eat me alive/ was too overwhelming to do anything, and it really, actually made me feel better. It's confidential and free !! If you Google SHOUT their website and phone number comes up.

I hope this is mildly helpful and I hope you feel better soon babe!