#im obsessed with their decks of cards they are so pretty

[s-ccaam-era-crepe]

got my deck of daddy things today and a scam likely pin was given to me as a birthday gift. I am in love.

[m00nt4r0t]

✮ why are they addicted to you? ✮

pile one, two, or three?

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ pile one

[tarot deck: tarot del toro] hiii pile one. you have the king of wands reversed, the title card of the deck, and the king of cups reversed. they’re addicted to you because there’s something about your energy that is very prominent, yet you keep it to yourself. you’re not interested in telling others what to do or teaching them how to treat you, you’d rather just rock alone and focus on yourself if someone isn’t treating you up to your standard. i feel as though you are very good at detaching your emotions from situations when you feel the need to, and this makes people crave your energy even more. if someone’s used to others being obsessed & clingy with them, you’re a shock to them because you’re not like that with them. you give off nonchalant energy, but in a very self-assured way. you know your worth and you know you don’t need to express it to everyone because you have deep inner confidence within yourself. people may get addicted to you from the moment they first see you. they also get addicted because they see you’re planting something for your future and they see that it’s going to grow to be very big and fruitful. people are wondering how you do what you do, so they’d like to stick around and learn from you. im also getting that you’re a creative person and you have a great imagination! you may be very good at creative hobbies and people are addicted to this aspect of you as well. people are also addicted to your style and the way you present yourself (makeup, hairstyles, piercings, tattoos, etc) im also getting that you can be very sweet, but also very sharp if you need to be, and people get addicted to this switch up of yours! they may have thought they could talk to you anyway they wanted just because you’re nice, but you quickly show them that your kindness is not an example of your weakness, and that you demand respect.

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ pile two

[tarot deck: spirit deluxe tarot cards] heyy pile two. for you we have the nine of cups, four of wands reversed and the five of wands reversed. they’re addicted to you because you guys don’t stop! you will finish what you’re doing even if it takes the last of your energy to do so, and then you’re going to celebrate after! you know how to release tension within yourself and with other people. people are addicted to you because you don’t hold on to grudges very much and you’re a pretty laid back person with a lot of drive and determination towards your goals. you’re also not the type to indulge in drama or conflict with others. people really like that you’re not trying to fight or compete with them unhealthily. they’re addicted to you because you don’t leave at the first sign of trouble, you tend to stick through issues and solve them if you can. if it turns out it can’t be solved, then at least you tried. they get addicted to your energy because they don’t feel the need to present themselves a certain way to be accepted by you. people feel comfortable being themselves around you. you feel like a breath of fresh air, pile two. they really appreciate you and want you to stay in their lives for the long run. some could become very selfish with your energy, so keep on eye out for that. im also getting that people are addicted to you because of the intuition and creativity you have. you may have a childlike view of the world, in which you see everything as an opportunity and you’re able to use your imagination to put your own spin on things. people are addicted to the mystical and magical energy you have. you could be very spiritual or just have a lot of faith and trust in whatever it is you believe in, and people find this to be very mysterious and alluring.

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ pile three

[tarot deck: the wizard’s tarot] what’s up pile three? you have the page of pentacles reversed, king of swords reversed and the five of swords reversed. they get addicted to you because they know that you always have something new in the works. you’re someone who has many different ideas and you’re willing to put in the work in order to bring your ideas into fruition. you’re not the type to quit just because you’ve made mistakes. you learn from your mistakes and apply what you learned so you can do it better next time. much like pile one, they’re addicted to you because of your inner power. you do not feel the need to boast or let everyone know what you got and how hard you worked for it. i’m seeing that you don’t hide it, either. you just do you and people feel the energy, they know you have confidence so stable that it’s impossible to knock the crown off your head. some people may be addicted to you because they want to try to knock the crown off your head, but that’s only because you’re a threat to their confidence and they see you as competition. i get the feeling that you don’t entertain these energies, though. you may pop out once in a while and people see that you’re doing good, but you’re not worried about what other people think of you, especially not people who want to compete with you. they’re addicted to you because you seem unbeatable. people want to be on your team or hear your side of the story. and people know that if there’s any conflict, you’re most likely not the cause of it. im also getting this energy that people who may have once been against you are now interested in being on your team because they know they won’t win against you, but they’ll definitely win with you. “if you can’t beat them, join them.” im not sure what you do that causes a lot of people to feel competitive towards you, but there’s a lot of people who wish they could beat you but they know they can’t. moving on, people are addicted to the knowledge and information you obtain. you seem to always be learning. you could have a book collection or maybe you write books yourself. people are addicted to your wisdom as well as your ability to learn so quickly and remember a lot of things.

thank you for reading and interacting! <3

masterlist ⭑ personal readings ⭑ patreon

[zarya-zaryanitsa]

on that topic - and im sure youve been asked this before, so do forgive me - what divination decks do you recommend? especially in terms of aesthetics, hah

Oh, well, what will work for you largely depends on your personal preference in art style and reading style.

Personally, I seem to currently branch out in two directions. On one hand the decks I use the most are 90’s Lord of the Rings Tarot and Game of Thrones Tarot because using elements of those stories alongside traditional card meanings helps me read better. On the other hand I’m obsessed with art history decks which I can analyse through learning more about the art pieces used in them. I’m currently working my way through Golden Tarot by Kat Black (gothic goodness) and I hope to purchase Boticelli Tarot (renaissance goodness) and Golden Tarot of the Tsar (eastern orthodox religious art goodness) in the future.

Edit: I’m also really interested in the new Hieronymus Bosch deck by Travis McHenry, if Polish version ever comes out I am 100% getting it for my mom cause she loves Bosch.

Would be cool to eventually find a Slavic mythology-themed deck that fits my tastes. Seeing how Slavic culture becomes more and more popular I’m pretty convinced I will eventually stumble into the right one.

[sinnful-darling]

oh i have an ask !!! but u dont have 2 do if u dont wanna, can you ask your tarot cards for me something along the lines of what should i be expecting in the next few months or what are some signs im on the right path (you can change up the wording if u like) — kitti

damn, spirit really wanted to bully you today. i’ll write the cards down for you then give you the reading. i’m still pretty new so i rely on the meaning, the background of the cards, and several other things.

CARDS:

five of cups

queen of cups

eight of cups in reverse

the lovers in reverse

page of pentacles in reverse

two of pentacles sideways

the fool

four of pentacles reversed

seven of pentacles

four of swords

eight of wands

four of cups

three of wands in reverse

Page of wands

The hierophant in reverse

Knight of swords in reverse

King of cups in reverse

10 of pentacles

ace of swords

the middle of the deck was: judgement in reverse

bottom of the deck was: ace of cups

moving onto the reading…

there seems to be a relationship that’s making you unhappy- the lovers is in the reading so i’m almost certain that it’s romantic. they’re distant (emotionally or physically) and you keep pouring and pouring into them, but it doesn’t seem to be enough. it’s distressing for you. because of this, spirit is advising that you put some thought into whether or not it’s worth it. it’s draining your happiness and your emotional state. consider whether or not you should cut your losses. i’m also seeing with the lovers in reverse that this relationship or this person isn’t fully ‘faithful’ per se. you may or may not be with this person but spirit has laid these cards out and i’m just the messenger. with the lovers in reverse, i’m seeing that you’re very very into this person and you keep giving and giving and giving, but they just aren’t fully there. they seem to keep pulling away? maybe? with the two of pentacles i’m seeing that this relationship is suffering because of disinterest/dishonesty, and they seem to be distant. with the four of pentacles in reverse, you seem to be waiting to be acknowledged by them or in general, and you feel undervalued or cast to the side because you aren’t. i’m seeing that you’re obsessing over this and you could be overlooking other doors that could open for you. with the three of wands in reverse, spirit is telling you that can’t you can’t avoid it anymore. You have to have confrontation with this person; try to talk it through with them. this person has a lot of charm and is good with words, so spirit is advising that you are cautious. Spirit is aware that do you know what you should do. I am personally warning you to heed spirits warning, lest spirit make it harder for you.

Spirit is warning you that there is somebody around you, likely older, that is manipulating you and likes to leave when things get messy. this person can be separate from the relationship mentioned earlier or the person mentioned earlier, so be extra cautious about who is around you. this person likes to pour in the bare minimum and take a lot more. this person is hurting you more than they are helping you and you might not see it. be cautious, be aware, and listen to your intuition. spirit will guide you. with the ace of swords, you need to outwit them to confront them. gather evidence, catch them in lies, and keep your head up.

with the fool i’m seeing that there is a new path that is going to open up with you. In this path it’s going to be rocky and full of new experiences. there’s gonna be lots of good times and plenty of fulfillment. there’s also going to be a lot of self discovery. Im seeing that you’re potentially going to fall in love and make new friends as well.  these next few months are going to be a very busy time, whether it be within your self discovery or with other people around you.

I’m seeing within the next few months that there’s gonna be lots of opportunities and lots of potential for you to achieve your goals and your aspirations. i’m seeing that the next few months are going to be a good time- for the most part, of course. i’m also seeing that there is a path that you know you should take in spirit is advising you to take that path. that path is going to lead you to bigger and better things, and spirit is advising you to not avoid that path.

Spirit is advising that you take time to heal past wounds and allow yourself to rest emotionally mentally and physically. there also some neglect towards yourself. with the king of cups in reverse, I’m seeing that you have really high highs and really low lows. I’m also seeing that you try to avoid confrontation and conflict, for reasons that only you know. You also tend to self sabotage and spirit is telling you that you need to examine yourself and your reasons for all of this in depth. once you do this, you’ll be happier and more at peace.  with judgment in reverse, I’m seeing that you’re too hard on yourself and spirit is warning you not to downplay your emotions or your experiences. I’m also seeing that you have some things you need to let go of, experiences you can use to learn from, and lots of change that could happen. spirit is telling you to pay more attention to your needs and wants, and wants you to listen to your intuition more. pay attention to your surroundings and your dreams, spirit will send you signs that you are on the right path- you will know when you see it. goosebumps, chills, crying; you’ll feel it intuitively.

ORACLE CARDS:

a time for healing

step out of your comfort zone

balance spirituality and practicality

your hard work is paying off

I hope this helped !!



[namelessinwonderland]

(this is a old picture) Part 1 Ex boyfriend Lore Storytime - after my breakup with Joker (im referring to guys as different cards in the deck, ex#1 = Joker card, it suits him) i was happy to be done with that toxic/abusive relationship. that relationship permanently changed my brain and how i behave in relationships. how am i supposed to act after years of being trained to behave like a pet for my boyfriend?? so we finally break up and i cut off my long hair to be super short, i start tring to figure out who i am when im not a pet. what do i like? a few months pass and im definitely happier than ever. this is all happening at the end of 2020.

and i went to target with my roommate late one night to get a puzzle for us to do together, when we went to self-checkout i saw a super cute guy working at one of the registers nearby and told my roommate that i thought he was hot. she took it upon herself to walk over to him and say " hii, my friend over there thinks you're cute can you give her your number?" i punched her so hard, i was so embarrassed!! but he asked how old i was just to check because i do look young and then gave me his number.

we texted for a while and had made plans to go out. i was so nervous. we were gonna go to a Italian restaurant but then when we got there, they said they were full, and you needed a reservation. we had no back up plan, so we ended up getting fast food and going back to my apartment and just talking and hanging out for a long time. the first few times we saw each other thats pretty much what we did, we would just chill and talk for hours about everything. i told him everything about me.

so now i was dating Ace<3 (Ace of hearts, A). i felt so comfortable and at ease with him. he would sometimes stay over, and we'd watch shows in my bed on my laptop or listen to music and talk till we fell asleep. I really did love being with him. the beginning of our relationship was perfect. i thought our whole relationship was perfect, i fell fast and hard. became obsessed. he was my everything. i my head he completed me and i never wanted to part from him. i know it wasn't actually perfect though.

we both had our own mental health issues and that clearly impacted our relationship... i still love A. once we moved states his mental health had a major decline. i sometimes wonder what would've happened if we didn't move. would we have lasted longer? would we still be together?

PART 1 - TO BE CONTINUED.........

[that-one-weeb-but-it-transformer]

Optimus with an artist human s/o

I must do the drawing is your always mood

But with art block half the time your chucking your shit out the window

He was there to actually pick up Jack, because Arcee was out on a mission with bulkhead you skipped class so you sat there sketching him, bee, and wheeljack

Couldn't get the grill right so you oh so casually went up and rubbed your hand against it

"Oh...so in....that looks right..."

Taking pictures for reference

"Can I help you-" "oh shit-"

It was just jack

"Sorry was taking refrence photos. Is this your truck?" "Uh...yeah..." "Can I get and interior shot?" "Maybe another day?"

Ayo Optimus not noisy but he kinda wanted to see them drawings

Turns out Arcee was out longer than expected and the next day you were there again and so was he because Jack was so nice and let you take some refrence photos of the outside you slipped a drawing through the open window with a thank you note and went about you way.

Hah. Not Knockout and breakdown thinking your an ally to the autobots and basically snatching you like they snatchin someones weave

"Ayo can I draw you-" "Bitch im litterally kidnapping you" "....okay so can I take some ref picks atleast? Please?" "...well shit you said please"

Not you having fun being kidnapped

"Damn I look good. Whats your name human?" "Y/n" "and why is such a fabulous artist with the autobots?" "The who?"

Oh. You- oh...oh shit.....

Not knockout dropping you off at your house and grtting your # ya'll buddies now

You despite being kidnapped for two days just show up again randomly and walk up to Jack.

"Yeah can I see the inside your truck no pictures no anything, just. Real quick?" "Sure?"

Oh shit your sitting in a transformer.

"Okay I know about your talking alien car that transformers into a huge robot"

Bam friends now now you go to the base everyday

Ratchet wasnt very Happy till he realized you were just extremely quiet. And YES he could work in peace

Often you sketch the autobots forms.

"Wow! Thats real detailed!" "Holy shit miko-"

You often let her go through your sketch book.

"This is a lot of-" "Shhhhh"

It was alot of Optimus: you dont know why to be honest it was like he your comfort person to draw

You've probably had every expression of his in your books, sketches of...well everything.

Mhmm those hip sketches somethin else dude

"I made my first art based Tarot card deck!"

Smokescreen realizes there based off them and is obsessed with his tarot card desgin (the sun card because come on its Smokescreen)

Optimus even compliments you on them and ask you about them you happily explain them to him

You tell him you based him in the Justice card and told him it was pretty explaintory

He told you he was honored that you seen him such a light, and there you go getting all flustered and complimenting him back

Arcee wants to know why shes the hanged man but your too busy being flustered

Now often he'll wander up behind you looking over your shoulder why you sketch away.

"What are you drawing today y/n-" "Ah! nothing! Nothing at all! Hah! Ha...."

Not more optimus hip images: they're just too fine not to draw

Despite being well Optimus he's very innocent and would simply see them as anatomy drawings

But they aint....you know that

For that reason: you refused to draw Optimus (or his hips) anymore and now your crying inside but tiding to have will power

HOT ANIME GUY POWER; drawing hot anime guys to leed your mind occupied but you just make Human Prime and your crying and screaming without the s.

Miko, knows because you forgot your bag at her house one time

"Damn man you got it bad." "I know..."

Luckily ratchet sees Vaule in your skills and ask you to draw out invention plans you say yes immediately

With Ratchet asking for help your around the base more often, sketching out plans for him

Which means you and Optimus talk alot more

He finds your conversations relaxing

You often fall asleep at the small table, after finishing plans and starting on your own work, usually homework

So that means he sees your litrle fifth grade crush drawings, you know with lopsided hearts and all luckily you know better to draw Human like alien robots in your notebook so he only sees the O + F/i surronded in hearts

He doesnt know why but now he's gotta talk to you more: its a now or never situation.

"Y/n-" "It wasnt me!-" "would you like to go home to rest?" "Um. Yeah that sounds great"

Optimus now drives you home everyday, and picks you up from school instead of you just riding with Bee and Raff

Litterally a dream come true on your part and on his part

Is it akward silence? Or do you both just think its awkward silence making it more awkward

Asking Ratchet to describe how the iacon archives use to look and sketching it out and giving it to Optimus

"Im not sure I got the file cases right. I had Ratchet describe the your world to me as best I could.

It was perfect to him, and he thanked you for it, it never leaves his glove box

Usually because your an artist your dressed in clothes that have paint stains, perhaps the back of your shirt is hand painted or your old converse.

Yet you had a presentantion you had to get dressed up for, for school, in a knitted pencil like skirt and a knitted sweater with some boots

He couldnt pick you up or drive you to school that day so Wheeljack went with you instead and Smokescreen picked you up

Not wheeljack bragging trying to get Optimus to confess that you look rather hot that day.

Turns out when Optimus returned to base he'd be blown away by your change in outfit.

"How'd it go!"

"All the energon secured. There was no doubt after all!" Wheeljack laughed, "Right Optimus."

You looked at him with such a big smile and eyes he only nodded with a smile

Wheeljack drove you home: saying the boss was tired and just like he had hoped you left your bag in his back seat

Now Miko and Wheeljack both have the power to tease you

Not Optimus seeing where you work and creating a holo form to go and see you

"Hm? Y/n?" The employee asked, "Yeah shes in right now there doing a study. Come on I'll take you there."

When he said study he thought idk maybe like with a book. Not figure studies, you know the ones where your naked

So he was not expecting to walk in with people surrounding you as you sat laid on a couch with a thin sheet covering your lower hips down, top bare and a hand propping your head up.

Poor baby had to stand there for twenty mintues attempting not to stare at you

But time was called and you got up going to dress again.

"Ayo n/n." "Hm?" "This guys here for you."

You only smiled hoping it was an art scout as you apologized for your current state and fixed yourself.

"Hello Im Y/n!" "I...I know..."

Voice sounded oddly familiar

"Do...I know you from....Wait a mintue!"

Pretty easy to figure it out, "stay there!"

He only listened as you rushed to your bag, flipping through the pages of one of your sketch books and lifted it up besides him.

"Its...Op-"

"I believe Orion- would be a better choice sounds more human."

Your weezing; hes evern prettier as a human

"I had no idea...you could..." "its older technology but works well." "Ah... I see..."

Thank god for being 18...primus hes just so pretty

"Um...I have to go pick up my work bag...do you wanna come along?"

Not you guys having a moment in the locker room where you told each other your feelings.

Making out in the locker room super softly? Absolutely.

Making out in his Alt form? Even a bigger yes, especially if hes dropping you off at your house

But its best to keep it a secret

Miko and Wheeljack notices that the teasing doesnt get to Y/n anymore and Miko realizes you stopped drawing Optimus and some human guy now. What a bummer

They realize Optimus does seem to have a much brighter glow to him, and he always lightly smells like something fimilar.

*cough* your perfume *cough*

"Is Y/n okay?" "What would be the problem?" "Shes always in a daze these days."

It true, drawings and plans you offered to help ratchet draw out are completed but sometimes you dont even remember drawing them or the process.

"Hmm? Yeah....I don't really care....whatever you want Miko." "Um Im jack and Im asking for the science text book back." "What!? Oh- sorry!"

"Ah Miko! Isnt the world so bright today!" "Its raining outside Y/n-" "Lets go run in it!" "What-"

You've never been so happy, even around finals your kicking your feet like a schook girl

It causes everyone great fear,

Not Optimus sneaking out of base to help you sneak out of your house so you guys can go have fun in some forest.

Refused to go into your room, its your private space but you convinced him anyways and well...its chaotic organization.

You show him around, pointing out things to him that your super proud of.

Ends in you guys on your bed trying to be quiet as you laugh with each other.

Falling asleep in his arms for the first time is wonderful

Not he leaving a jacket behind for you to wear and you do just around the house it did have the autobot insignia on it after all.

Sleeping prime refrence photos if you wake up before he has to leave

Can dance surprisingly well, and he'll go dancing with you in abanded parking buildings

You couldnt find a more perfect boyfriend

Finds a way to go to every art gallery your in.

You often do peices based on the bots and there stories, like a verbal reference

Some of your paintings worry him: you always reassure him you cant always have a happy peice but your happy to have him

Old people think your both just the sweetest couple

Until your parents pull up and your not a couple anymore, you try and keep it a secret from everyone and ya'll manage

Your parents like him upon introductions that you are both friends

Your dad's actaully a greek philosopher, and gets along very well with Optimus, he did introduce himself as Orion after all.

Life is good for the both of you

[leossmoonn]

thinking of a study session with matt lmao (im homework obsessed XD) but fr like in college or something you guys would be doing flashcards or prep tests and hed jsut look at you being all serious and think its so attractive and ofc hes not helping bc have you looked at him!?!??!

He def knows you have a crush on him and uses it to his advantage

He can hear your heart racing, smell the sheer line of sweat gather on your forehead, and he can sense the little mannerisms you do when he talks to you. You shy away, giggling a little and he can feel the warmth from your face as your skin flushes with heat. It takes everything in him not to kiss you.

“Who was deemed the father of modern psychology?” He asks.

“Wilhem Wundt,” you answer. “Great,” he smiles.

Ugh and that smile. It lights up his whole face and the whole room. It makes your heart flutter and your knees weak. You could stare at it for hours if he’d let you.

“What school of thought did him and his student make?”

“Structuralism.”

“Awesome! I don’t know why you’re so nervous. We’ve almost gone through the whole deck and you’ve only gotten one wrong.”

“And what if that one makes me fail?” You worry.

“It won’t. Trust me, I don’t get A’s on all my tests and I’m still passing with an A.”

“Well, you’re really smart.”

“And what makes you think you aren’t?”

You shy away again, fiddling with your thumbs as you adjust yourself in your chair. “Thanks for helping me again.”

“Of course. Thank you for making the cards in braille.”

“No problem. It was kind of cool to learn braille.”

“Well, you’re pretty good at it. Not as good as me of course.”

You chuckle, “Oh, of course.”

You stare at him for a few long seconds. Your eyes drop down to his lips and Matt can sense the spike in your head rate, the way you shift in your seat to unconsciously lean closer to him. As much as he would love to make out with you in the library, he knows this isn’t the right place. Plus, he loves to play the teasing game with you.

He helps you study some more and you find it difficult to focus. All you can think about is how his arms around feel around your body, how good he smells, his laugh that makes you smile.

“You okay, Y/n?” A small smirk plays on his face. He cracks just a little. He cant help it. Your reactions entertain him.

“Huh? Y-Yeah. Sorry.” You turn your head away from him, but you keep your eyes glued to his face.

He goes back to being serious, but his mind is also facing of thoughts about you. Safe to say y’all ended the studying session with a kiss :)

[tranquilstudy]

june 15 | this is a little bit of an update and q&a type of post! I wanted to let you guys know where I am in life, give a bit of an introduction to new followers and answer any questions that anyone may have about me or my studies. So, my name is Katie and I’m 20 years old, living in Canada currently and studying psychology and linguistics in my third year in a double major undergraduate degree. Currently, I am not taking any summer classes but I am working two jobs: retail and in a phonetics lab, studying spontaneous speech and whatever else my professor wants me to analyze. I’m very grateful for the opportunity to work in this lab, as I am learning soooo many new things and so many doors are opening for me this way. I’m just hoping I can keep the ball rolling. Otherwise, I enjoy baking and writing poetry, reading and playing music. I am currently reading “A Game of Thrones” and I’m watching “Star Wars: The Clone Wars”. My mental health unfortunately has taken a bit of a downturn lately, no doubt due to exhaustion and stress. I’m hoping to balance my life out more so that I can have more peace of mind. Right now, I’m also working on moving to the south side of the city I live in, and it’s going to be a massive change but I’m excited for it! I’m looking forward to trying out new cafes and exploring that side of town. Im also thinking of what I can do once I graduate, because that’ll happen in a year and a half from now. I’m thinking a masters in linguistics specializing in phonetics and maybe signed languages, but I’m not sure. Working with signed languages in a phonetics lab has been a challenge for sure 😂 but the things im learning man… it’s great. Im happy with where I am, but I know I have a long way to go. Welcome if you’re new here or hello again if you’ve been following me for a while! Im gonna go ahead and answer the questions you guys asked now!

@labarium so I’m sorry that the tagging for this user is not working properly… I’m not sure what makes it work and what doesn’t make it work honestly, but this question was asking about how I got into doing tarot readings. I’m honestly not really sure what got me into tarot in the first place. I know that that’s not a super exciting origin story, but the one thing that I can say is that I was always interested in the idea of divination and of “talking with spirits“ and I remember being interested in tarot and wanting to pick up my own tarot deck, but being nervous because tarot has such a bad reputation of being, you know, a devils deck, or something that brings bad energy into your home, etc. etc. However, when I began doing my own research on the subject I learned very quickly that that was not the case and it was just a myth, and once I learned that I very quickly went out and bought my own dock and started doing readings for myself and then eventually that expanded into doing free readings for other people and that was how I practised for several several years and now eventually I’ve moved on to doing paid readings. I also get very obsessed with looking at all the different amazing artwork that’s on tarot decks and I love the fact that tarot has become a form of expression for a lot of people to create their own decks to express themselves creatively through that. In terms of what card would be my favorite, I would say in the deck that I use (the ethereal visions tarot deck), my favourite card would probably be the moon which is just really pretty and it has all these blues and, I don’t know, it has like a really pretty lady on it and it’s just very nice. In general though, I’ve always had a very strong connection with the five of pentacles, which is a card that represents loneliness and abandonment. When I got my first deck I would do readings for myself as I said, and I would get the five of pentacles like daily or every couple of days. I got it for a long time, and then one day I realized that I hadn’t gotten it in a long time, or I haven’t put I hadn’t pulled it in a long time. And then I realized that I actually lost it out of my deck which is supposed to be significant for that part of your life being removed and that was it a point in my life where I had really turned my self around and gotten with a better group of friends and I was on the right path to a better social life and a better support system for myself. Let me be clear that I don’t believe that tarot cards can speak with spirits, I’ve learned better through experience.

@just-a-cup-of-anxietea So, the next question was already partially answered, but the part that I didn’t answer yet was how long have I been doing tarot readings. So, I started doing tarot readings for other people when I was in grade 11 … so that would mean that I’ve been doing it for about 6 to 7 years, with my oracle deck being used a little less, so the oracle deck I’ve been using for about… I’d say about 3 to 4 years.

@beautymaleficent So the last question I have asks me how I discovered the academic path that I’m currently on. I knew coming out of high school, or in grade 12, when I was applying to universities that I wanted to go into something it was going to help people. I knew that I really liked studying why people do the things that they do and why the brain works the way that it does, so I remember thinking that psychology would be a good fit for me. Oddly enough, my second choice to get into university was music education, so if things are going a little differently I might’ve ended up as a music teacher or conductor! I ended up getting into both choices but I picked psychology because that was my first choice. I remember in my first year being interested in linguistics because I’m top of psychology I was interested in language, and I was always a big reader so I was always fascinated by how powerful language can be and the way that we can use language to convey things to other people. I asked my introduction level psychology professor who I could talk to about linguistics, because I have no idea what it in tailed or what the degree was about. When I ended up talking to the guy that he recommended, this guy told me that if I were to go into linguistics I would not be successful, I would not be able to get involved in the research, I wouldn’t make any money, so that I should probably just forget it. And I remember as a first year that was really intimidating… So I ended up staying away from it for a whole year. Then in my second year I realized that I was still interested in linguistics, so I just did it because that was what I wanted to do. The second part of the question asks if I’m happy with where I am going academically, and I would say as I mentioned before that I definitely am. I think that the choices that I’ve made especially in the last year have really helped me to boost my GPA and to get myself good resources and references for the future, but that I also still have a long way to go. But doesn’t everyone say that?

Thanks everyone! I hope you’re all safe and well and I’ll see you around!

🎧 i wanna get better - bleachers

[youranxiousnerd]

Showtime Thoughts

bc i am in love with julia lester

spoilers below

First off, why is this episode so short?

ngl i forgot mazzara was a regular

ricky ded besties

awww nina and the letters 

she looks very good in her dress

ashlyn and ricky look so good

“We’re screwed!”

ash and ricky are too funny like where were they this season?

chaotic and pretty best friends

sidenote, why did they go see north high’s production? 

oh my god ricky and nina are talking

SEBLOS IN THE BACKGROUND

i am taking what i can get

RICKYS FACE WITH THE CARD!!!!!!!!

my favorite part of the episode

his makeup looks very good

he looks very good

as @organic-guacamole said, he is very pretty

its been like three minutes and it already is so chaotic

yessss kourtney’s mom!!!

so howie and kourt are fine? gah since when?

“look for the shortest fork” mood

I CANNOT TAKE EJ SERIOUSLY HE LOOKS LIKE AN ANGRY BIRD

big bird ej comin at you

oh

PORTWELL DATE

wait isnt this ejs last show? is he going to miss his last afterparty for a date?

true love bitches

GINA MY LOVE

“Is he with us?”

NORTH HIGH SET OUR BEST BOI ANTOINE ON FIRE APS GET READY

seb being a supportive boyfriend is everything i needed

jenny is frazzled

i love how all the techie turned actors are nervous at some point during the episode

REDLYN CONTENT

awww thats so cute love the callback!!!

ooo howie is here

love how the writers leave a cliffhanger and then close the book before it turns to tragedy with one line

mazzara and ej, thats it

jenn what

why is mike there?

that was so unnecessary like aren’t mike and jenn over?

LILY

“did we forget to build a moat around the school” 

let ricky be single challenge

she just said “lol” i cant

props to ricky for keeping calm during the show after he saw mike and jenn

ah so lily is a child of divorce?

“lily scram”

RICKY AFTER THE CURTAIN OPENS WHY IS THIS FUNNY

STOP MAZZARA IS THE VOICE OVER

HE SOUNDS REALLY GOOD

how did ricky do that so fast-

put on gloves over the cast, makeup, and a mask?

i dont work with costumes 

AMERICA EXPLAIN

The one scene we get from the show...

Yay Steph!!!!

“Big Red has not thrown up in twenty minutes” ashlyn’s little smile

“she heard wrong”

someone please explain how spotlighting the judge is a good idea it makes it seem like things went wrong

“Carlos is a seasoned professional” honey carlos is on the verge of a mental breakdown

“He says help

Communication

Seb translating for Carlos is beautiful dramatic, yes, but im right. 

im so proud of them. they go from not talking for a week to seb being able to tell how carlos is feeling based off a stoic expression.

SOULMATE SHIT

IM SORRY NO BOP TO THE TOP CALLBACK

LIKE NONE

WHO WANTS TO RIOT WITH ME?!?!

wait so carlos goes from on the verge of a mental breakdown to full on performing and speaking?!?!?!? Speaking well too, not stumbling.

he looks so comfortable on stage when not even ten minutes ago he looked like he was going to vomit?

h e l p

ashlyn’s little laugh!

NINI IS A FORK IM LAUGHING THIS IS GREAT

big red lookin’ at his girl

ricky what are you doing?

ASHLYN AND GINA

I QUIT THEY’RE ADORABLE

GET IT KOURTNEY

howie’s little mouth drop

i cant with sebs costume i should not be laughing how is he able to do a kick line

ASHLYN MY LOVE

be our guest was enjoyable. it had a lot of moving parts. frankie and dara sounded really good. it’ll probably grow on me the more i listen to it.

is it just me or did be our guest lack some energy?

NATIALIE IS SO AGGRESSIVE

awww gina bb

portwell!!

“my mom sent me jordan fisher”

big red and ricky!!!

...what is big red doing? has he been faking sick?

“PLEASE EVERYONE REMAIN IN THE SAME ROLE YOU STARTED IN” 

BEST LINE OF THE SEASON OMFG 

alright what the hell is up with howie?!?

kourtney is so excited and then downer howie comes to ruin it

nina just write “thanks for being the best bro and glad youre not dead”

btw kourtney and gina look really good in their costumes

ASHLYN!!!!

SHES SO PRETTY THANK YOU

redlyn!!

gina and jamie!!! 

he looks so proud

glad gina gets to see her family!

cute scene, jordan is a nice addition!

RICKY AND THE BOWL

julia lester is killing it with the vocals

big red is so in love

seb bouncing in the costume 

“she’s never looked at me that way before” evil smirk

PORTWELL GLANCES

my heart fricking stopped when carlos went on stage 

being early on your cue/missing is awful would highly not recommend

a bop to the top callback after this would have been perfect

those harmonies!!

THEYRE SO IN LOVE

ummm phone call?

CHIPS BIG SCENE

...why wasn’t seb cogsworth? 

alright that was really good. everyone (even the backup) sounded really good. portwell rights! ashlyn rights! kowie rights! acting rights! 

so mazzara and jamie?

Ashlyn is the perfect Belle fight me

“Eat it Zackey Roy!” how about “yay kiddos, nice job!”

ej’s little dance

“bc you’re ginas brother” 

he is enamored by her it is adorable

EJ CASWELL RIGHTS

“hey, jordan fisher, would you like to f up one of three stableish ships in hsmtmts?” “sure, im in!”

ej!!!

aww hopefully he doesnt take the conversation too heart. they both like each other so much.

Portwell is so enjoyable to watch.

return of the bro

ej go get your girl dont worry about her brother please

SOMEONE TOUCHED THE PROPS

all hands on deck

“Can you just jump off something high”

I seem to remember Ricky falling from something high last episode, is that correct? 

She tells this to one of her most UNSTABLE kids

Oh shit

Miss. Jenn

Wtf

like what the actually hell

look at the kids faces they’re heartbroken

Miss. Jenn why. You’re stressed about the show, but you’re not performing it. They are. They have to worry about lines and cues and pitches, not you. Miss. Jenn has literally gone at the kids this season. Opening night speech too Ash and Ricky, shutting Seb down, that comment. She has become obsessed with the Menkies and North High. It has gotten really bad. These kids have put everything into this show, even their relationships (both platonic and romantic) and that is how you repay them? 

I didn’t think they would address this, I lost hope after last week but I am so glad they’re going too.

Someone send Seb after Miss. Jenn please, let him rip into her, he would do very well.

Miss. Jenn is supposed to be the role model and she just told a kid to jump off something high.

nina has been a godsend this episode, props to her!

haven’t been the biggest nini fan this season (off and on for me), but she was very behaved this episode. 

if there is anything the east high kids are good at, it’s bullshitting their way out.

“aim for my face” character growth

I KNEW IT

LILY WHY HOW WHEN WHY 

WTF THEY END THERE I CANNOT WITH CLIFF HANGERS

I liked the episode. Didn’t love it, but liked it. I really wish we got to see more acting, like we didn’t even see Big Red and E.J go on stage. Not even the iconic yellow dress. Some of the drama is so unnecessary, like why Mike and Jenn? What is with the Kourtney and Howie drama the writers insist on having, can’t they just be happy?

Besides the whole harness incident (burn that harness and mask it is causing so many problems) the production went very well, too well. This is East High we’re talking about.

Promo thoughts because what

oo they’re sneaking, maybe Big Red’s thingy

YES ASHLYN GETTING THE LOVE SHE DESERVES

oo Kowie confession?

portwell please be okay

what is up with carlos’ hair?

so seb, miss. jenn, and carlos scene? this has the potential to be very beautiful.

“It’s not over” not this again... 

i’m thinking carlos and seb are going to talk to miss jenn.

Sidenote, if we do not get a good seblos scene I will riot.

Hopefully Miss. Jenn apologizes with a billion sorrys

rini you just broke up please dont get back together 

im scared

if it is a scene where they close the book i will be very happy

Are we getting a flash forward scene? I’m pretty sure Miss. Jenn said Menkies aren’t till two plus weeks after the show.

We know based off the promo pics Ej and Gina are at the cast party, what went wrong?

Wait do we not get to see the finale of the show?

We better see the goddamn transformation

how does lily home and core four song fit in? im more curious about the lily one.

In conclusion, I am not ready for this to be over and the transformation needs to be sent to hell.

[rreeaahh]

“I like you in blue.” | Blaise Zabini

pairing: blaise x ravenclaw! fem! reader

words count: 5,786

summary: despite of any difference between them, blaise found himself falling for the ravenclaw girl who likes to shuffle the tarot cards.

warnings: swearing; underage drinking; sexualizing; smoking; fluff, angst, happy end

tagging a person who showed minimum interest for this idea (sorry if im bothering you, love!!!) @freddieweasleyswife​

a/n: this is the longest thing i’ve ever create. please be kind dear lord.

 Your smile was growing with every joke Michael Corner was telling you and the other Ravenclaw girls while sitting in the courtyards of Hogwarts, the sun giving your hair a fairy sparkle. Your robe was besides you, the sunny day of April giving you a warm feeling to your spine and if it wasn’t the blue tie around your neck, tied carefully, Blaise Zabini wouldn’t assume your house.

“Blaise, fuck off,’ spoke Pansy, already annoyed by his lack of concentration to her speech, ‘I’m trying to help you with your birthday party.”

The Slytherin boy looked at her and gave her a bored look, after rolling his eyes. “I already told you, Pans, my birthday is next week, Monday.”

“Yes, I know,’ she responded with a sigh, ‘but we can throw the party Saturday.”

“Why not Sunday?’ asked Goyle, his best mate nodding his head.

“Yeah, Sunday’s closer to Monday,” Crabbe added, making Draco roll his eyes.

“Because you two are the dumbest people alive and you’ll be sick the next morning, and that’s going to get us in trouble if we’re caught.”

“Yes,’ continued Pansy, ‘so keep it a secret, only Slytherins.”

The rest of them agreed with the dark haired witch, but Blaise was looking to you again. He was somehow jealous of the way other guys could talk to you so easily and make you enjoy the conversation, while he failed every time he tried to approach you. He could feel you tense up as soon as he’d be next to you, talking, and how you were trying to avoid any contact with him.

“Do you hear me, loverboy?” Pansy snapped her finger in front of him, gaining his attention. “Only Slytherins, so stop looking at her.”

Despite of his friends believes, Blaise was interested in you. They told him multiple time about your subtle rejection, but you never actually told him to stop – he’d observed you since your fourth year and he figured out your talkative attitude, and he was pretty sure that if you’d want him to disappear, you’d simply tell him.

“Oi, Blaise,’ spoke Goyle, also looking at you, ‘didn’t you get bored?”

“Yeah,’ Crabbe continued his speech, like an annoying parrot, ‘she’s annoying, playing hard to get.”

“Besides,’ said Malfoy before Blaise could tell something, ‘I really am surprised you pay that much attention to a mongrel.”

He only rolled his eyes again, questioning himself about the kind of friends he chose – it was true that he also had that purity concept in his mind, but when it came to you it seemed to be invisible; besides, you were half as pure as he was, so it wasn’t such a big deal.

“She doesn’t play hard to get, Crabbe,’ he said and got up, the bell announcing the end of the last break of that day, ‘She is hard to get, and that’s a really fun game to play,” he smirked to himself as he saw you leaving the group of Ravenclaws and going to your last class for that day. “My birthday, my guests, Parkinson,” he simply said to the girl and left them behind, following your steps to the Divination class, a class he chose to attend in his third year just because of boredom. That’s were he saw you for the first time, and the next year he found himself looking for you in the big room.

Usually you were going to Divination with your housmate and friend Padma Patil, a girl who was somehow strange in Blaise’s opinion just for the fact that she was in a different house than her twin – looking at the Weasley boys he always thought hat identical twins are identical in everything. When Blaise entered the class, the tea smell hit him immediately, along with the scent of old books from where Trelawney could teach them something important, but she only spoke nonsense.

His eyes found you quickly, seeing you at a table, looking at the crystal globe with boredom. He walked to you and set his books down, gaining your attention, You looked like you saw a ghost, but that didn’t make him step back.

“Hello, dove,” he spoke gently as he sat down next to you.

He could already feel you tense up because of the nickname he gave you after a dove sat on your head in the fourth year, as you were in the train station, waiting to go back home. Nobody seemed to notice besides Padma and Cho, who were right next to you, but Blaise saw and smiled when you two made eye contact.

“Blaise,” you simply greeted him, trying as hard as you could to give him as little attention as you could.

Deep down you knew that all the attention Blaise gave you made something to grow in your soul, but you were also aware of all the comments running around Hogwarts about his reputation and behavior, so you tried to keep you for yourself. He wasn’t a bad person to you, even if you often heard him being a jerk to his friends, but that wasn’t enough to fall into his trap.

“How it comes you’re here, all alone?” he asked in a calm voice.

His voice was something you started to hate about him – it was so dual; when he’d spoke to anyone, he’d have a flat tonality, bored and cold, but when he’d spoke to you, he’d become the nicest person in the entire school, and that duality made you doubt his true intentions.

“Padma’s sick,” you said and looked at him in a rush, your eyes leaving his as soon as you realized he was already watching you.

“You don’t mind if I take her place today, right?” he asked and you dared to look at him, his dark eyes softening suddenly.

He thought that that question was actually asking if his presence was bothering you or not. By the way you’d respond him – sincere or just polite – he’d know how to treat you in the future. You, on the other hand, tried to make the best decision; a full hour next to him would be dangerous for your lucidity, but before you’d think twice you gave him an unexpected smile and nodded your head slightly.

“It’s fine,’ you said and Blaise returned your smile, ‘you can’t work alone in this subject.”

“So I’m just didactical material?” Blaise asked, pretending to be offended, but Trelawney entered the class, shuffling a deck of cards.

You didn’t respond Blaise, paying attention to the introduction the Professor made about that lesson, talking about Cartomancy and they way the cards could tell you the hole future of a person. Your tablemate wasn’t so concerned about her speech, his eyes and full concentration being on you. Even after two years of being aware of his interest in you, the boy still wasn’t sure about the nature of his feelings – it was a crush, an obsession, a target or a true love? He wanted so hard to find out and to reach that goal, but he couldn’t do that if you gave him no opportunity.

“Blaise?” you tried to wake him up from his open-eyed sleep he fallen into. He saw you looking at him with big doe eyes and he was amazed by the bright color and tried to play it cool, even if he was caught off guard. “We’ll read each other future,” you told him and continued to shuffle the deck of tarot cards.  

“You really involve yourself here, don’t you?”

“I didn’t take this class just to pass time,” and by his shamed expression, you figured out that it was exactly what he did. You laughed at his reaction and continued to shuffle the deck. “D’you know how to do it?” you asked and looked at him – his eyes were scanning your hands, their fast moves.

“Ladies first,” he winked in your direction and you rolled your eyes. “Could you also tell me what’re you doing, exactly?”

“I need to shuffle the deck so the energies will become one – after that, you need to pick some cards. Think about your future and chose one,” you encouraged him as you showed him the cards.

Blaise got one out of the deck at showed it to you – The Lovers, upright.

“Another one,” you said and he did as you asked; The Fool, upright. You just gave him a look and he understood that you wanted him to choose more cards.

The next three cards made you open your eyes wider – Chariot, Hermit and Sun, all of them in reverse. Blaise looked at you, confused, and asked if everything’s fine.

“Well, we should take it step by step,” you began and took The Lovers. “It’s kind of obvious what that card means, but in connection with the rest of them it’s not so bright,” you admitted and he only looked at you, waiting to continue.

“The Fool means innocence and vulnerability, but it’s also a card that shows already misplaced steps, so maybe you have a romantic situation with someone but you made the wrong moves on them.”

Blaise raised his brows – did he make something wrong to you? Would that be the reason that you were so distant?

“The next three are more complicated,’ you continued, ‘because The Chariot means that a part of you knows what’s best but you don’t do it, and it may be because of The Hermit brings a fear of loneliness with it, but also a state of isolation. The Sun is a card that usually doesn’t bring bad things with it, so you don’t need to stress too much over it – it means that everything will end up fine, but you need to take care and to be gratefull.”

If Blaise would be honest with himself, he understood nearly nothing – the only cards that seemed important were The Lovers and The Fool – if that nonsense was true he needed to approach you different.

“Your turn,” you smiled and gave him the deck, which he started to shuffle, thinking about your future. He hoped for you to have more good cards than he did.

When Blaise gave you the possibility to extract five cards, you ran your hand all over them and picked the first ones that you felt  connection with – The Devil and The Star upright, while The Moon, The Lovers and The World were reversed.

“Holy shit,” you said out loud, all the students looking at you as Blaise tried to figure out if it was good or not.

“What happened, Y/N?” asked Professor Trelawney and scared you with her sudden presence. “Merlin bread,” she also muttered and picked up the cards.

“It’s good?” Blaise asked. “I mean, we both got The Lovers and The Sun and The Moon,” he said confused.

The panic took control over him as he saw you being concerned with your cards. “That means your approaching future is connected,” the teacher said, suddenly excited of the odds the cards predicted.

“But not in a necessary good way,” you said somehow annoyed. “The Devil means seduction and The Star is hope, The Moon in reverse is full of insecurities and fears, while The Lovers in my case will bring suffering and conflict.”

Blaise felt embarrassed. He thought that you two will match each other in a good way. “And The World?”

“The World in reverse means that she’ll feel incomplete for a while,” Trelawney explained and clapped her hands. “You two are bonded, you need to keep in touch with me for the next days, kids, that’s exciting.”

The teacher left and gave you a feeling of anxiety, being alone with Blaise. The cards meant that you two will have a dark future together so all you needed to do to avoid that is to avoid him – but why did that idea give you a bigger feeling of sadness that the cards did?

You let the rest of the deck back on the table and started to write down what Professor Trelawney was telling about Cartomancy and its way to predict the future. “Y/N,” Blaise whispered, trying to get your attention, but you asked him to let you focus. And he did. He even wrote down some things too, despite it was clear that he was bored to death.  

“That’s all for today, kids, and remember! The future can’t change you, but you can change the future!” the teacher shouted. “Or it was inverse?”

 ***

“Michael, shut up,” you laughed and cover your mouth, trying to make less noise. “We’ll be kicked out of the library.”

It was already Saturday and a lot of students were in Hogsmeade, leaving the castle emptier. Michael offered himself to help you study to Potions, an object you were struggling with. It was even more complicated now, when Horace Slughorn was the teacher.

“Fine, fine,” he said and grabbed your hand, uncovering your mouth. His action was seen by the Slytherin boy from across the room, who was pretending to study with his friends. “I think we’re done here,” the boy told you and you rolled your eyes.

“You’re not helping me if you get bored after twenty minutes,” you told Michael as he got up and grabbed his things, smiling to you as he left you there, books all over the table along with parchments.

Blaise saw it as the perfect opportunity to approach you again – since the weird Divination lesson he got no chance to talk to you. You were always running to your classes, eating with the rest of the Ravenclaws, hiding Merlin knows where – all he got to do these few days was to watch you whenever your ways would came together. He left Crabbe and Goyle alone, not caring if they would say something in protest.

“Alone again, little dove?” he asked you and sat down right next to you, making you jump in your chair, scared of his sudden apparition.

“Not anymore,” you chuckled and damned yourself for the feeling of joy that erupted inside you.

“Glad to keep you company,” he smiled gentle, resting his elbows on the wooden table. Blaise Zabini was a gorgeous boy – his dark eyes seemed to be lighter when the sun would hit them and his skin seemed to be warm and soft, especially his lips, which would always lift up in a smile near you. He wasn’t the same bored, annoyed and frowned boy you’d see when he’d be around other Slytherins.

“Why so happy?” you asked and put your elbows on the table too, resting your head on your palms.

“Can’t a boy be happy when he’s near a pretty girl?”

“I’m flattered,” you smiled and looked at your notes, only to avoid his gaze.

The sweet gesture of blushing and avoiding his eyes made Blaise’s heart jump in his chest – it was a strange sensation, which made him even more confident on his decision.

“What’re you doing tonight, dove?”

You tried to think about your plans, but they were nonexistent. It was a Saturday night, so you’d probably end up staying up late with Padma and Cho while talking about Rowena Ravenclaw knows what.

“Nothing much, I think,” you shrugged. “Staying in my dorm.”

Blaise felt luckier than ever. “Come to a party with me,” he asked with joy in his voice. The smile on your lips only grew bigger in amusement but you realized that he was dead serious.

“A party?” you asked and laughed with sarcasm.

“Yeah,’ he responded, ‘don’t tell me that Miss Y/L/N doesn’t break rules sometimes.”

“Oh, she does,” you said and started to draw in the corner of one of your parchments. “What party?” you asked and this time Blaise was the amused one.

“A Slytherin one, of course,’ he said proudly, ‘and you’re my guest.”

Not knowing how to react, you gathered your things slowly as Blaise watched you and got up, squeezing the papers to your chest. “I don’t know,’ you answered and you were ready to leave, ‘I’ll think about it and I’ll let you know.”

You wanted to leave so you stepped away from him, but before you knew he got his hand around your wrist, pushing you behind a book shelf. Instinctively, you pressed your back against the old wooden shelf and looked him in the eyes, confused.

“Why are you always running away from me?” he asked directly, leaving you breathless. He was close to you, his body nearly pressed against yours, and his nose was blowing air on your lips.

“I’m not,” you lied and he just scoffed, like he was tired of this stupid behavior of yours.

“Y/N, it’s confusing, dove,’ he started, ‘you’re not saying no to my flirt but you don’t play along either. Am I bothering you with all my insistence?”

It was the first time when Blaise was playing his cards as he got them – open to the public eye; in that case, you. All you could do was to shake your head as you’d continue to watch his facial expression, now relaxing.

“Then why are you always so scared to be around me?”

His question was so simple and yet so complicated. If he’d know the true answer everything would change, and your future could be the same as the cards predicted.

“We don’t belong together, Blaise,” you sighed.

He laughed, shaking his head as he disapproved you. “And why’s that?”

“I’m a Ravenclaw and you’re a Slytherin,” you tried to say, but he interrupted you.

“You think we don’t belong together because of our houses?” he said like it was some kind of joke.

“Don’t you?”

Blaise Zabini didn’t know if he should be upset or amused by your question, Yes, of course he was raised with the idea of Slytherins being superior to the others, but he was also a very curious boy, who always got what he wanted – and now he wanted to know why you were running away from him.

“I don’t when it comes about you,” he confessed. “I don’t care if you’re a half-blood, a Ravenclaw or anything else, dove. You’re pretty, and I like you in blue.”

His other hand was now on your cheek, caressing your skin gently.

“I’m not so pretty,” you said and looked him in the eyes, like you were trying to convince him that he could do so much better.

“Shouldn’t Ravenclaws be smarter than that?” he joked, making you also let out a chuckle. “Come with me tonight,” he asked you again, this time witching you with his soft touch.

You were sure that Blaise put a spell on you, or else you couldn’t explain yourself why you were getting closer to him. “Ok,” you whispered.

“Good girl,” Blaise smirked and placed a fast peck on your lips, like he just showed you that his intentions are way bigger. “Sorry,” he said smiling, “I wanted to do that for two years.”

You blushed – hard, and he found it cute. Everything about you seemed to be so innocent and vulnerable that he wanted to keep you for himself.

“What should I wear tonight?”

Blaise shrugged. “I don’t know, dove. Anything you feel comfortable with.”

But his answer wasn’t satisfying. “I’ll find something good enough to not embarrass myself in front of all those pretty SLytherin girls.”

“They’ll be basic, darling,’ he laughed, ‘green or black.”

“Then I’ll search for something like that, too.”

“But I told you, I like you in blue.”

After another blushing cheeks, Blaise freed you and let you go to you dormitory. He went back to his table, were now were also Draco and Pansy, talking with the two idiots.

“I knew you’d come out of nowhere after your little bird left the library red like a tomato,” Pansy laughed but he knew it was just a way of hiding her true emotions – she wasn’t mean in reality, but she wanted to keep up with her boyfriend’s reputation.

“Funny, Pans,” he simply said and sat back down on his chair. “Got what we need?” he asked Draco.

“Yes, your mother made sure we could bring all the bottles back to the castle without being caught.”

“That’s the least she could do for her only child,” he joked. “Y/N’s coming tonight, so you better be nice – or, better, don’t even speak to her.”

“Why?” asked Goyle.

“She’s hot,” continued Crabbe.

“Watch your mouth, idiot,” muttered in annoyance Blaise, looking at him.

“Oh, c’mon,” continued Pansy with a smirk. “Don’t tell me that she didn’t caught your eye after she grew a pair of boobs.”

“She’s right, mate,” Draco said and laughed.

“Her body’s a bonus,” he admitted without any shame. You were gorgeous and he couldn’t deny that your body was a bonus to your personality.

“A big one, if we keep in mind that you know the bare minimum about her,” Pansy said in the same mean tone, making Blaise roll his eyes as the rest of them laughed at him for being so in love.

 ***

In six years at Hogwarts you took part to many parties – parties thrown by your house, by the Gryffindors or Hufflepuffs, but you never got the chance to enter the Slytherins’ Common Room and to party along with them. They didn’t bully you personally, but you had eyes and ears so you could be aware of all the mean comments those kids could say. Just because they were rich and pure they thought they were some kind of royalty, and you felt strange, being half of what they were.

The cyan dress was hugging your curves and the make-up Cho putted on for you was elegant and yet simple.

“Take care, ok?” Padma asked as she hugged you, being afraid of the idea – you meeting Blaise after the cards literally said that you two together would destroy each other.

“It’s a party, Padma,” you laughed as you stepped away from your friends, sneaking out of the Ravenclaw Tower. The cloak you were wearing helped you walk in the dark without being too obvious. It was around ten when you entered the Dungeons and when you were surrounded by the sound of water hitting against the stone walls.

In the letter Blaise sent you was written the hour he was expecting you and the password of the Slytherin House, along with an advice about how to trick the skull.

“Password?” the skull asked when it saw you standing there, arms crossed to your chest.

You rolled your eyes and sighed. “Pureblood,” you said between your teeth, and the big door opened immediately after.

You stepped in and you were amazed by the green lights coming from the ceiling, the loud muggle music you could recognize and the dancing ring in the middle of the room. All the Slytherins were dressed elegant, the boys wearing shirts unbuttoned to the first two or three buttons, and the girls being dressed in fancy dresses while holding a champagne glass or dancing sensually with each other. It was new for you, all that club atmosphere.

“You’re Y/N, right?”

You looked behind you, were two young boys were holding firewhiskey glasses. You nodded, still confused.

“Blaise’s waiting for you,” the taller one told you while the shorter one held out his hand.

“Give me your cloak,” he asked nicely and you did as he said, thanking him. You felt kind of revealed, the dress reaching your knees while the other girls’ were half to their thigh or long to the ground, but cut on the side. Some of them were watching you and the anxiety took control over your body. Did Blaise really deserved you to go through all of these, only to see if you could be good together?

You followed the boy to the other side of the big room, walking past dancing teenagers. Blaise sat down on a leather couch, surrounded by boys and girls, all of them smoking or having a glass of alcohol. You really felt strange watching them, because you knew how forbidden was to do such things in Hogwarts – in the muggle word, when you’d visit your grandparents, you’d frequently see teenagers smoking in parks or having a can of beer.

“Y/N!’, Blaise greeted you with a big smile on his face, ‘you made it!”

He got up from the couch, abandoning his cigarette in an ashtray to hug you and kiss your cheek. “You look amazing, dove,” he whispered in your ear as you melted slowly in his arms. Now that Blaise was present, you didn’t felt in danger anymore. You were completely lost, no chance to leave that party without admitting to yourself that you’ve fallen in love with the boy who, for two years, was nice to you everyday.

“Guys, she’s Y/N,” Blaise told the others as he sat back on the couch, dragging you along with him. The other Slytherins greeted you and a girl named Tracey said how much she loved your dress, asking you where did you get it.

“It was a present from my mother, from the muggle world,” you said, realizing the words you said only after saying them.

“How cool!” she shouted, a little dizzy from the firewhiskey. “You two have that in common,’ she said while leaning to Theodor Nott, ‘Blaise spends a lot of time in the muggle world too, even if he hates them!” she laughed.

You only nodded your head and smiled to Theodore, who apologized for her behavior.

“Want something to drink?” Blaise asked you, a hand appearing over your shoulders.

“Do you guys have anything else besides firewhiskey?” you whispered in his ear, giving him goosebumps.

“I’ll bring you some champagne,” he said back, making you laugh.

“Fancy,” was all you could respond before he got up, leaving you alone with the others.

They were chatting and laughing, only Tracey smiling to you and asking you some questions from time to time, while she was now in Theodore’s lap. Blaise came back with a sparkling glass, the bubbles tickling you when you drank.

 ***

It was the third or the ninth glass of champagne and you were laughing to yourself as Blaise was talking nonsense in your ear, kissing your lobe from time to time while holding your hand. He’d kissed you now and then, only shortly when he considered to be fine with you – you didn’t mind his soft lips against yours.

“I need to go to the bathroom,” you said and tried to get up.

“I’ll show you the way,” he told you as you were on your feet, but a sound of heels stopped him.

“It’s fine, partyboy,’ Pansy laughed and grabbed your hand, smiling friendly, ‘I was going to the bathroom too,’ she said, ‘and also, Draco’s waiting for you in your dorm, for your birthday surprise,” she winked in his direction and started to walk away with your hand in her, her steps taking you to a large common bathroom with mirrors and sinks and toilets. You entered a toilet in the same time as Pansy and let out all the liquids in your body, breathing in release. When you exited the toilet, Pansy was washing her hands and watching you through the mirror.

“I’m really glad you could come to Blaise’s party, he really wished to have you here near his birthday.”

“It’s his birthday?” you asked terrified. He never told you why there was a party.

“Yeah, but it’s Monday, you still have time to bring him a gift if those kisses don’t count,” she joked and winked to you, while your hands froze under the water. “It’s fine,’ she said when she observed the blush on your cheeks, ‘we already know about your friendly relationship.”

“Our…,” you muttered confused.

“Yes, Blaise told us how long he ran after you until you gave up and accepted.”

You didn’t understand her words. “Could you be more explicit?’ you laughed, ‘I think I had too much champagne.”

Pansy leaned on the sink and took out of her purse a cigarette, lighting it with her wand. “I heard Blaise telling the boys how good you were looking and how curious he was to see what’s under those blue robes, and I see he didn’t give up until he brought you here, to his party.”

“What?” was all you could ask, starting to feel the emptiness in your body.

“Yeah, I guess you know his mother,’ Pansy chuckled, ‘I think it’s a family tradition to want something that you can’t have and after you have it, to use it and be bored of it soon after.”

Her words were hurting your ears, your heart.

“But don’t worry,’ she continued in a friendly tone, ‘Tracey was in your place too, and she told me it was worthy – Blaise knows what to do with a girl.”

But he didn’t know what to do with you. That was his intention? To seduce you, to give you hope that you could be together, after all, and then to use you as a toy? Madness started to grow inside you along with sadness.

“Thanks for taking me to the bathroom, Pansy,” you smiled to the young witch, who only smiled back and watched you leave.

You wanted to leave. You wanted to leave and never get back there or near one of those Slytherins. They knew – they were aware of Blaise’s little game of playing with you and they did nothing. Of course they did nothing – you weren’t one of them.

“Dove!” shouted a voice behind you but you continued to walk until you left the Common Room, standing in front of the skull and ignoring its questions. All your dizziness disappeared once you heard Pansy’s words.

“Y/N!” called Blaise again, now grabbing your hand and making you stop. “What happened, dove?” he asked confused, his eyes red and his breath smelling like menthol and smoke.

“I don’t want to be here anymore, let me go,” you asked him calmly but he didn’t.

“Tell me what’s wrong,” he requested worried. And that made you angrier.

“It’s wrong how stupid I am!” you laughed and freed yourself from his grip. “I really believed we could end up together for real!”

Blaise raised his brows. “We could?” he asked confused, and then he realized. “Of course, we still can,” he said immediately and made you laugh harder, angrier.

“Fuck off, Blaise Zabini. I’m not one of your toys so fuck off and never talk to me again,” you told him and left, he still shouting after you when he heard a pair of steps and paws coming from behind him.

Even if he knew what was the best thing to do for you two, he swore and got back into his Common Room, ready to question Pansy about what the fuck was wrong with her.

***

Monday was already a tiring day, but after a whole weekend full of tears, you were practically a zombie. The bags under your eyes were dark, no matter how hard Cho tried to help you to cover them, and the lack of sleep and food was obvious simply by looking at your face. The reason, anyway, was known only by you, your friends, and probably all the Slytherins.

Care of Magical Creatures was a fun class for you – that’s why you chose to take it. Hagrid was a nice teacher, always making everyone feel good during his lessons. The worst part was that Blaise and other Slytherins were taking that class too, and you didn’t feel like dealing with him. You practically had no idea what Hagrid was talking about because you were trying too hard to avoid Blaise’s gaze in the crowd of students. You’d look at the cloudy sky, the trees moving because of the wind and you tried to predict when the rain would come.

“Thank you very much for today, kids,” Hagrid said in his accent, happy that no one got hurt that day.

Everybody started to go back to the castle, following the path, but when you wanted to leave the forest the way was blocked by a solid body.

“Move away,” you asked without looking at him.

“You can’t ignore me forever, dove,” he sighed and looked over his shoulder, seeing that you two were now alone.

“I could try, at least,” you shrugged and crossed your arms over your chest.

“Could you just listen to me?”

“So you could lie?”

But Blaise did something you never expected – he got a little bottle out of his robes – Veritaserum.

“What the…”

“Stole it, long story,” he simply said and took a sip before giving you the bottle. You did what he did and gave back the now empty bottle.

“What happened?” he asked.

“Pansy told me you’re only playing.”

“I’m not,” he answered and you were somehow shocked.

“I don’t think we are good for each other.”

“I do.”

You rolled your eyes and tried to keep your mouth shut, but the potion made its effects. “I’m not good enough for you. I’m not like them.”

“Like who?” Blaise asked worried and approach you, grabbing your hands gently.

“I’m not elegant like the girls in your house. I don’t smoke and I don’t drink firewhiskey, I don’t party like that and I don’t wear that kind of dresses. I’ve never had sex and I don’t think I want to have just now.”

You covered your mouth and looked down to your shoes.

“I don’t care about those things,” he said sad. “I care about you, ok? I care about your smile and your passion for Divination, I care about your cute cyan dress and about your big eyes. We are good for each other, Y/N.”

His voice was strong and sure about its words, and that made your eyes form tears again. “I’m scared,” you admitted. “I’m not a Slytherin and I’m not like who you’d like me to be.”

Blaise smiled to you and cupped your face, wiping away your tears. “You’re pretty,’ he said, putting a little smile on your face, ‘and I like you no matter what.”

Knowing it was the pure truth, you smiled bigger and crushed your lips against his, the rain starting to pour on your bodies.

“I told you, my dove,’ he said with his forehead leaned to yours, ‘I like you in blue.”

You started to laugh with happiness as the rain started to be more violent, hitting the ground with big drops. Blaise grabbed your hand and started to run with you to the castle, hand in hand, his green robes fluttering along with your blue ones.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 7/6/21

im in the middle of moving so this is a weird one. i know i say that about all of them but i am thoroughly off kilter this week

listening mcr’s kiss the ring. i would really love to say that im listening to a lot of new shit bc the new place is kind of a hike from my current apartment but no! im just listening to the same four hour playlist of songs that remind me of my sad cowboys.

im mildly obsessed with mcr’s weird little album Danger Days. it sounds nothing like the rest of their shit. it’s great. did you know there were a whole bunch of singles before the album proper that were eventually collated into the EP Conventional Weapons?

more of an au than whatever the fuck im up to but i do VERY much love a loud angry sneering song from someone trapped in a system they hate

reading fallow week. ballard’s the drowned world is in a box of books at the new place and while i could find an ebook that would take effort away from vegging out on star wars fic from 2013

watching kung fu hustle (2004, dir Chow) somewhat asynchronously with a weekly movie watching...group? club? what are we...

anyway this movie makes me happy bc everything happens so much all of the time and all of it is ridiculous. the comedic beats are down to the fucking millisecond. i read an article when i was in middle school about how the road runner looney tunes cartoons had the beats between a specific type of joke and the punchline timed down to the actual animation frames (something like twenty-two? a TINY number) and watching the things happening in this very silly movie feels like that sometimes. i love a movie that gets in, does what it wants to do, and gets out in an hour and forty minutes.  

this is a film that is jammed full of references to other movies the director likes, but the main thing that makes them work is they stand alone. i have never seen The Blues Brothers but the Blues Brothers homage characters in this film are a goddamn delight to watch in their fight scene. apparently the line “strictly speaking, we’re just musicians” is a direct quote, but it works so well in this movie on its own. delicious. i keep this movie next to the nutella in the back of my pantry for when i am extremely sad and eat it with a tiny gold spoon

playing real-life tetrising all my belongings into a small hatchback and into a new apartment tiny islands by david king is short enough that nobody notices when i play a round during my workday and soothing enough it resets my brain a little. i am really picky about deck building games but this is more of a card mechanic than an actual deck builder.

you get two cards every turn that you have to place on a blank map and then draw island boundaries around whatever you place in order to get the highest score. it’s a delight. it’s free. it runs right in your browser.

making i had a brief mild panic bc i did no textile crimes this week and then remembered i wrote a wholeass fic. enjoy my p**nography, it got a hundred hits in its first twenty four hours. for an incredibly obscure f/f/f pairing i think that’s pretty great

no punches left to roll with [E, F/F, 1212 words]

Fallout: New Vegas, female Courier/Veronica Santangelo/Christine Royce

Beds are for sleeping and having a pretty girl sprawled out across your lap like a centerfold. Beds are not for reading pre-war nerd magazines.

[sneakydraws]

Well, here it is - a lengthy explanation of each card in my mdzs major arcana deck and what I meant to convey/what i would have changed in retrospect/what alternatives i considered! It’s a bit messy and my typing style is lazy but hopefully it will be an interesting read to some of you :)

And so you don’t say I didn’t warn you - jiang cheng’s section (11 justice) is absurdly long lmao

0 the fool  I elaborated on this in the post itself but yeah basically jin ling is kind of representative of all the damage and trauma caused by the past, and there’s a kind of danger there of him falling victim to the same vices as the older characters and repeating the same mistakes and perpetuating the cycle of war and misery (the cycle that we already see with how the jin sect became the new wen sect, and later with how jgy became the new wwx) and he has a lot of room to grow! He grows so much over the course of the novel, comes to realise the complexities of the past and gets a harsh life lesson in how nothing is as black and white as it seems. But ill save talking about his progress for the end, for now whats important is that he has room to grow and also a dog. I don’t really have a justification for the sun, i mostly just thought it looked sick? It made its way to the next card as well, where it makes a bit more sense, but then i realised it was a dumb motif to include 1 the magician I still very much like wwx for the role, and that illustration would have probably had him raising a corpse on his left and pointing threateningly to the sun on his right. I considered including the table as well, with some mdzs relevant items replacing the card suits. Anyway, like i said wwx got a few cards to himself already so i went with the alternative wq design, since i think she fits the card as well. Both she and wwx are highly skilled people, extremely driven once they set their mind to something. The card to me symbolises the creative mind as well as a general drive for action, which fits them both - wwx was famously a prolific inventor, and wq came up with a previously unheard of surgery, after all. This card strays pretty far from the rider-waite deck design, largely because i was still figuring out how i wanted to approach this series, but you can still see the influence. 2 the high priestess I was actually going to skip this card at first because I couldn’t think of a fitting character, but once i considered a qings character post death, it all fit pretty well. She was already a highly intuitive person in life, and in sharing her memories with wwx she is, in a way, relaying a kind of secret knowledge. Anyway she’s one of my fav characters so im glad i got a chance to include her. The coffins could be interpreted to be xxc and sl or xxc and xy 3 the empress Theres other mother figures in mdzs who got to be mothers for a longer time, but jyl definitely embodies the positive aspects of this card the best. She’s nurturing, kind, emotionally supportive, she already mothered wwx and jc quite a bit when she was young. Plus i liked that the rw card had both water and flowers, making an easy lotus connection. In retrospect the stars look kind of out of place and i should have replaced them with something more relevant... Also, i should have had her hold a lotus seed pod instead of a flower, haha 4 the emperor Like i said I considered jc for the role but hoching bullied me into admitting that nmj was better… they’re both more of an inverted emperor than an upright one but then again theres hardly any character in mdzs who would fit upright emperor so. Jgs was also considered but he’s even uglier than nmj so i couldn’t bear to draw him 5 the hierophant It was pointed out to me that lqr would have fit this card better and the truth if that statement haunts me to this day. Unfortunately I have no space in my brain for lqr so lxc got the role instead. My main reason was his role during the wen destruction of gusu lan, when he ran away with the contents of the library - this is why there’s bookshelves behind him. The keys, take, from the rider-waite deck, are meant to represent the gusu pendants that allow you to enter 6 the lovers Im sure many people would have chosen wangxian here but I uhh don’t really care abt wangxian personally? And also their love story is so convoluted that jyl and jzx seem idyllic by comparison lol. Also i didnt really have an idea for who to put in the angel’s place for wangxian… mme jin certainly did not get these two together in the end but undeniably she and mme yu did initially give them a chance to fall for each other so. Thats something i guess. Anyway the trees became their sects’ flowers and the mountain became the burial grounds - an omen of their tragic fate, basically 7 the chariot There might have been other characters who fit this card better but i couldn’t really think of another card for lwj and i thought it would be weird to not include him… anyway i don’t really care for current timeline lwj BUT i do like that he was clearly influenced by wwx to walk his own path in life based on his moral convictions rather than follow his sect’s rules blindly. The chariot is to me a card of self control, self determination and focused action, so it seemed fitting. The composition felt kind of empty without the actual chariot so i padded it out with the guqin, the cloud recess in the bg (it doesn’t look great but i tried to replicate the drama design….) and the bunnies which conveniently fit the colour scheme of the sphinxes in the rider-waite design 8 strength Like i said before, my interpretation of this card is more… morally ambiguous than the quote unquote official meaning, so i thought about manipulative or duplicitous characters more than kind characters whose strength is expressed through gentleness (though i did consider jyl briefly for the latter interpretation). As such, i considered both jgy and nhs, but ended up going with jgy largely because i couldn’t pass up the opportunity to put the nie sect’s beast as the lion. 9 the hermit My thoughts immediately went to bssr lol. It may be an overly literal interpretation but whatever, i like it just fine. And i like that i managed to echo the rider-waite silhouette in the mountain and the tree (and even in bssr herself) 10 wheel of fortune God i love the parallels between these 2… this card to me is about how you cant trust your current situation, good or bad, to last forever, and these 2 embody that perfectly imo. Wwx went from son of a well off servant and a powerful cultivator, to street rat orphan, to adopted son of sect leader jiang, to double orphan, to MIA, to terrifying but admired warrior, to terrifying and despised traitor, to dead, to, at the very end, suddenly respected and trusted again. The dishonesty and cheapness of whatever the public’s current opinion of him is is portrayed beautifully as far as im concerned. And jgy of course claws his way up to power only to instantaneously become public enemy number one, to the point that he’s probably blamed for stuff there’s no reason to believe he had a hand in. Wei wuxian’s silent astonishment at how quickly the cultivation world turns against jgy and towards him again is a delicious moment of thematic resonance.  11 justice I settled on this card for jc after he got booted from the emperor seat but i do think it fits, in a somewhat convoluted way. I turned both the sword and the scales into visual representations of the golden core transfer (can you tell im obsessed with it). According to biddy tarot, the justice card is partly about searching for the truth, and the scene where jc finds out about the transfer is of course a big deal. I was also very influenced by the reversed meaning again - which is about being reluctant or unwilling to face or accept the consequences of your actions. I feel on an intuitive level that this fits jc but I’m not sure how well i can explain it - it’s something about how he’s a little too comfortable scapegoating wwx for things that were also, if much less so, influenced by his actions, and also something about the way he keeps wwx at an arm’s length emotionally but still leans on him and accepts his support when he really needs it, and somewhat hypocritically expects wwx to put the needs of him and the jiang sect before the needs of others. And also something about the core exchange is the consequence and proof of wwx’s deep - terrifyingly deep, even - love and care for him, which is something jc doesn’t seem to let himself acknowledge. Maybe even something about how you could argue that the way all of the jiangs acted around wwx - jfm’s favouritism that left him with the feeling of a debt he needs to repay, mme yus insistence that he be a servant more than a brother to jc, prepared to give his life for jc, and jc’s own unwillingness - or inability, he was a child after all - to clearly acknowledge wwx as an equal to himself, enabling wwx’s self sacrificial and protective tendencies - that all of this was what caused wwx’s complete and unquestioning willingness to do whatever it took to protect jc, and therefore paved the way to the golden core transfer. And i don’t mean this to be scapegoating jc - especially considering how young he was when this all went down, it wouldn’t be fair to expect this level of emotional perceptiveness, awareness and maturity of him - but i think adult jc has to grapple with the fact that the chain of cause and effect was not as simple as wwx fucking everyone’s lives up to be a martyr, and that both jc and his parents had a role in that story as well. I don’t even necessarily think this is something that jc only realised in the current timeline - i think it’s something he felt on some level this whole time, and it probably led to a lot of feelings of guilt - but the suibian reveal definitely puts it in sharp focus, and i think he’s now better equipped to handle this introspection than he was as a recently orphaned, traumatised teenager, lol. ANYWAY the window with the fabric is both a nod to the rider-waite design and a reference to the destruction of lanling - i actually did some basic ass research for this, and it seems that in ancient china fabric would indeed be hanged in a window if the normally used paper was damaged. The design of the window, as well as the very idea to use it to imply the reconstruction of lanling, was taken from this great piece of jc angst by my pal moroll1! Oh yeah also the covered window kind of works as a denial of forgiveness for jc because it’s like a halo but covered up... Also I completely forgot to put a blindfold over his eyes which would be perfectttt because blind justice and the core exchange......... ok moving on 12 the hanged man I always have issues with this card because i cant find a satisfactory summary of what it’s really about. Best i can tell it symbolises a need to hit pause, surrender or let go of something… ive also seen it tied to sacrifice? So mo xuanyu doesn’t fit perfectly, but sacrifice is definitely there in a surface level reading kind of way, and the idea that you have to surrender or let go in order to achieve your goal does fit the whole deal of getting revenge but giving up your life in exchange and not being there to see it 13 death This is probably one of my favourite cards, definitely not because I have huge issues with change or anything…. I see this card as signalling the necessity of change or putting an end to something / leaving something in the past in order to start anew? At first i considered putting past wwx, mxy and current wwx here as a kind of transformation and one cycle flowing into the next... But firstly, I’d already used mxy in the very previous card, so putting him in again would feel like overkill, and secondly, the longer I thought about it the less convinced I was that this would even fit with the card’s meaning? Because coming back from the dead doesn’t like... trigger an internal transformation within wwx or anything? Anyway, fun fact: the design I ended up going with was actually originally intended for judgement! I thought I was being very clever with the whole “figure plays an instrument and the dead rise” parallel, but apparently I’d just completely forgotten that the judgement card had a completely different composition... Truly I was boo boo the fool... But yeah anyway at the end of the day I figured the design would kind of work for death as well, with Wen Ning and the theme of transformation, (since in his case coming back as a fierce corpse does actually mark a certain transformation in behaviour) and Wei Wuxian’s protection of the Wen people essentially signifying an attempt to break the cycle of oppression if that makes any sense? Like, wwx is trying to revolutionise the way the world works a bit, if you catch my drift 14 temperance  The centrist card! Again this is probably going off track from the “official” interpretation, but to me this card has a certain “don’t commit fully; do everything in moderation; don’t take either side” flavour to it that i personally find infuriating irl and that i very much assign to lxc. It’s entirely possible that I’m misinterpreting his character because i didn’t really pay him (and the 3zun in general) much mind while reading, but hell, I’m allowed to pick favourites and choose who i want to interpret deeply vs shallowly. Again, i wish id chosen lqr for hierophant because its so annoying for a character i don’t care about to get two cards…. But oh well 15 the devil My alternative idea for this was jgy as the devil and lxc plus nmj as the figures, but since all three had been featured already (multiple times, even!) i figured I’d go with xy instead, especially since he’s among my faves lol. I think the devil signifies something along the lines of unhealthy attachment, obsession or addiction, which isn’t 100% accurate in the case of xxc and a-qing, but if i stretch it a bit to cover toxic relationships in general, and especially manipulation or negative influence, i don’t think it’s half bad. My main struggle here was to choose who amongst the xxc/sl/aq trio to choose for the human figures. 16 the tower Arguably jin zixuans death and the following massacre of nightless city were the final and most direct reason for the siege of burial mounds, and the tiger seal is good shorthand for wwx’s loss of control over his powers, which led to the deaths of jzx and jyl. When reimagining major arcana i like to feature some kind of building in this card (spoilers for a possible future project but in my rose of versailles major arcana set the tower is bastille) and even if it’s not a tower, the image of wwx looming over the gathered crowd from atop a rooftop is so good i couldn’t resist 17 the star Struggled with this one - considered both jin ling and lsz for it, as symbolising a hope for the future, but that was kind of covered by the world so it wouldn’t make sense to include here as well... As usual when I struggle with interpreting a card (as opposed to understanding it but struggling with matching a character to it, like with death or moon) I went to biddy tarot and read all the details about its meaning. What i got was that this card signifies an incoming period of introspection and inner peace following a time of turmoil, as well as a general moving on into a new, better phase of one’s life or finding new meaning and purpose. The figure also suggests someone vulnerable, but possessing a keen sense of intuition as well as a good degree of practicality and common sense. Given all those, I settled for mianmian because IM LOVE HER..... I also kind of see her as a prelude to the “just one person is enough” theme present in tgcf!! And i think her decision to abandon her sect because she saw the toxicity and corruption in it is a very inspiring action - even if it didn’t make a large visible impact, i think the appearance of her and her idyllic family at the very end of the novel - paralleling and mirroring wangxian - implies that at the end of the day, it was a meaningful one 18 the moon Another card i ALWAYS fuxking struggle with - this time less because i can’t grasp its meaning and more because I can never find a character that fits it well. I usually get fixated on the “dreams and subconscious” part, but if i lean more on the “disguise, deceit, anxiety and fear” part, i eventually figured the whole yi city arc wouldn’t be a bad fit. I say the entire arc because it really does encompass all those themes if you include both the past and the present - xue yang’s disguise, his tricks with the villagers, a-qing’s lies and even xxc’s reluctance to talk about his past as well as xue yang pretending to be xxc all fit the disguise and deceit angle, and the general mystery and creepiness of the current timeline yi city work well with the anxiety and fear - the mist, the slow uncovering of the past, even a-qing being revealed to be an ally after scaring the shit out of the protags. I definitely struggled with including all the elements and characters, and even moreso with making them vaguely fit the rider-waite composition, but i think it ended up okay ish. OH and i completely forgot to draw mist swirling around them :( 19 the sun I was considering mianmian’s family for this one, but since I used her for star, I ended up with wwx and his parents instead. Once again I’m reinterpreting the card a bit - normally I think it symbolises incoming times of pure happiness and abundance, as well as a connection with the inner child, but I gave it more of a nostalgic or sentimental twist - wwx looking back at the brief glimpse of his happy childhood. 20 judgement another card that i struggle to interpret a bit... Here i actually used the tgcf tarot zine as a reference! In it judgement is summarised as “rebirth, following duty, absolution” SO i figured that nhs, mxy and wwx all together would fit pretty neatly... wwx achieving (public) absolution through clearing his own name after being reborn, and nhs sort of calling on wwx to expose jgy’s crimes... It’s a bit messy but not bad I think! 21 the world This ties very closely to my read on mdzs as a story - which is that it’s, at the end of the day, largely about cycles, and about how hard it is to break them, but how we gotta keep trying and have hope anyway. Or maybe more precisely, that the people directly involved with and influenced by the trauma of the past might not be able to get over said trauma and that the hope for healing from it will be shouldered by the new generation. Or something like that… Basically what i mean is that jc and wwx and lwj and lxc and nhs and jgy and all these people who were in the thick of the sunshot campaign and the siege are so profoundly affected by it that it genuinely feels by the end of the story like there is little hope for them to ever truly overcome that trauma and build a better future without repeating the same old mistakes - but there is a glimmer of hope in the new generation, specifically in jl and lsz. And it’s a bit paradoxical, because they have also been directly impacted by the past tragedies - lsz having his entire clan wiped out after wwx failed to protect them, jl losing both his parents to wwx’s mistakes - but despite that loss, and despite coming from arguably the two opposing sides of the past conflicts, they are both, in the end, capable of moving past that tragedy, of recognising the complicated nature of those conflicts (jl’s moment of clarity at the end is both heartbreaking and hopeful) and forging friendships between clans in the process. I honestly think that the extra where jl is struggling to assert his authority as sect leader, to treat his subjects well and to cooperate with other sects in a truly amicable way is the single hopeful ending note for the larger themes of the novel - it allows us to imagine that maybe these kids can learn from the mistakes of their elders rather than getting sucked in by resentment at those mistakes, and actually build a brighter future for the cultivation world. And sidenote, this is also why i have a soft spot for jin ling and lan sizhui as a ship... speaking of which their poses were directly referenced from the lovers card ehehe

Looking back, I’d like to add some symbol of jin ling’s trauma so that it mirrors baby wen yuan in the tree stump... maybe his father’s sword? 

[tar-oh]

Pick A Pile: What’s Coming At you in love

So, a few weeks ago I started a pile that ended up feeling really heavy and just not what you needed to hear. Like, I think a lot of us were going through some stuff (and maybe still are) and at that moment, it wasn’t a love message you guys needed. So, today I did a new one and this one felt so much better and happier? Also, you can tell I’m procrastinating schoolwork. lol So anyway, this is about what’s coming towards you in love. Most of the piles seem to focus on things that are already kind of going on, but some seemed to be about new things. So, I really do have to ask that you please only take what resonates and not try to make anything that doesn’t fit, fit. My biggest fear is that I’m going to give someone some false hope, so if it really does not sound like you or your situation, then don’t take it. But, also, know that it’s a general reading so it may not fit you and it also may be just super vague. That being said, you can choose more than one because maybe there’s one with more of the message for you or there’s more than one person coming towards you? Anyway, just choose the one you feel most called to.

Today, I’m feeling a Musketeers vibe so I’m using a picture of the guys from BBC’s Musketeers for you guys to choose: 1: Aramis, 2: Athos, 3: D’Artagnan, 4: Porthos :

Pile 1: Aramis

Cards: The Empress, 7 of Wands reversed, King of Swords, The Hierophant reversed, 8 of wands reversed, Death  I kind of get the sense that this pile is one that's been alone for a bit. I mean, maybe not a really long time, but like some of you were. With the empress I see that you're taking care of yourself, and even though it's 7 of wands and reversed, I get kind of a 9 of pentacles feel from this particular card. In this one she's just smelling the flowers, but content. But with it reserved, I see like this idea of feeling alone? Like, okay the first song that played when I started this pile was Moonlight Lines by Movements, and it's about two people who just kind of want someone to fill their bed with them. Like, this sense of wanting another body with them. Basically, a one night stand, but also someone to sleep next to for a night, right? I'm not necessarily getting a one-night-stand vibe as what's coming towards you (really, not at all), more just that feeling of wanting someone to be with you at night. A body beside yours. And, like this empress energy is you taking care of yourself but also you wanting to care for someone else. And, 7 of wands being reversed can be an exhausted energy. Like a, when am I going to find someone? But, also, I draw that 9 of pentacles feeling from it too because it's not like you're not doing okay. Like, I think you've been fine alone, but now you're just bored. The next song that played was Love Took The Last Of It by Movements, and I kind of think maybe you've been burned and maybe it took you a while to feel better and want to open up again. Or, maybe you just kind of have a habit of getting into situations that aren't for you and they fall through, so like, you're tired of this. I get the Death card with that, like you want to end this cycle. And I see death as being that, an end to a cycle. I always talk about how much I love that card, it's the card of change. Like, yes it means endings, but beginnings too? So, like, you're just ready to move out of this energy of being alone. The hierophant being reversed to me means that whoever it is coming towards you is not really your usual type. Upright, the Heirophant is all about convention and playing by the rules, and reversed it'd be the opposite, though I'm not reading it that way with this reading. Especially not with the King of Swords showing up. No, instead I'm just reading the Hierophant reversed as maybe this is someone who maybe at first when you meet, you're kind of like, "Oh, I don't know. They're not really following the standards I look out for." I don't mean someone not good for you. I mean, like as in maybe you have a list in your mind and this person doesn't really have all of those things on that list. Maybe they check a few, but there's a few things where you're kind of thinking that maybe it won't work. But, with the King of Swords, I see that they're really honest, maybe to a fault. And, the king on this particular card is old, but I don't really think it's that way for everyone, though I feel like for many of you there is an age gap but I don't think it's one like in this card where the girl towards the bottom of the card looks younger and he looks like he could be her grandpa or something. But, I think that him being older here also might point out that one of you is really wise. Like, old-soul wise. So maybe this is someone you look up to? A mentor of some sort, or just someone you look to for advice. I'm not sure. This could be reversed, and maybe your older than them/they look up to you, and maybe it's even that you're not their usual type? With the 8 of wands being reversed, I see that maybe this is just going to take a bit longer than you'd want. Like, maybe you two need more time to get to know each other. Or, even meet I guess since this is more along the lines of what's coming towards you. Anyway, I see it as coming slowly. Maybe it's delayed a little (which, I mean, at least here in the USA, things are still pretty crappy with Covid and doesn’t look to be getting better) So, this might just be a while out. But, again, with the death card, I see it being an end of a cycle. So maybe before you both can meet or end up together/around each other, you need to close out some things. Like, the Death card REALLY sticks out to me today. And it's funny because, it's the Scorpio card, and so that's like around Halloween, right? The Lovely Omen's deck Death card is so pretty. She wears this black and white striped suit, and like, it reminds me SO much of Beetlejuice lol so I'm getting halloween vibes here, so maybe that's significant to you both, like maybe a birthday in Scorpio season, or the surrounding sign seasons through out like Oct-Nov? Or, maybe that movie's plot has something significant to you both? (seeing this also with King of Swords too, like air signs, so Libra season so, again, october?) Or, maybe it's as simple as it being black and white and like again going back to the Heirophant being reversed and this idea that this is someone who may not fit what you're originally looking for or vice-versa, maybe it's like stop looking at everything so black and white. Look at the greys in between, right? I also want to point out that she's also wearing a moon necklace on the card, and this deck has a lot of references to the moon and stars in the other cards, but this necklace always stands out to me because it's reminds me of how with change comes uncertainty. So maybe it's going to feel really uncertain, especially with the idea of looking at the grays in between? Like, its kind of scary, but like, nothing in life is ever really all that certain? So, like, this unknown is staring straight at you, and I think these cards are kind of saying, "You obviously know how to take care of yourself, so you're going to be okay. Just try something new" Like, oof. I don't know where that last sentence came from, but yeah! Exactly how I'm feeling about this! Or. This person does have gray hair. Lol i mean I’m fairly young for gray hair and I get them when I’m super stressed. Like, look at Logan Lerman, he looks GORGEOUS with gray hair (and Im his age so!!! High Five to us for premature gray hairs!) (Okay, I had written earlier that this didn't seem like new energy but I deleted it because I was like idk, but the song Seneca by Movements came on -which i have it on shuffle but for some reason it's only playing this album?- and it's about someone thinking about how they still love an ex who's now engaged and like how bittersweet it is how they enjoy how happy they look but they miss them and like! Idk! for some this is definitely an ex, but for others it just someone you know already probably!!!) So, maybe even if it's not someone new, it's a new situation? Like, maybe this relationship with this person, even if you've never been in an actual one with them, it's like new to you both. New territory. And, the song In my Blood by Movements came on because again, it's not really shuffling the playlist, lol, but this feels like maybe this is someone you just have a connection to. Like, even if you two haven't known each other that long, you just feel that bond. And like going back to that scorpio energy, its intense I think. In that King of Swords card, that lady looks like she's kind of worshiping this king, and I think it's going to feel that way for both of you. Hopefully not like an obsessive thing, but more like a, you both really have the hots for each other and at any given point, you're both playing that lady on that card, hanging onto the other like that. And he looks really serious, so maybe someone here is really serious and more of an all-work-and-no-play kind of person, but like I don't read that as an absolute bummer. I read it more as someone who's like, just really good at getting shit done, even the hard stuff. Also, he's got a great body lmao so I think you're going to end up being super attracted to this person, even if it's not a jaw-dropping eyes meet the first time story, ya know? Like I said earlier, it's kind of a slow burn I think. I don't have any cups here, which I guess might pose a problem, because at first it seems like a lack of emotions? But I have swords and wands so I see a lot of action. But I also feel like you connect on an intellectual level, like I get that with the Hierophant (even if it's reversed) and King of Swords. I also feel like you'll have like an earthy kind of connection. Like, even though I feel there's a lot of passion, I also see that you two can just chill. Bottom of the deck energy for the Lovely Omens Deck was High Priestess. So, I definitely read this as you kind of maybe having a feeling that this is coming towards you. Also, with the hierophant, even with it being reversed, in this deck she's wearing moon earrings, but they're crescent moons. So, it's like the moon is whole with the two halves, and I definitely see that as another hint at knowing? Like, going back to the 7 of wands reversed and how I felt more of the 9 of pentacles with it instead, like you being alone for a while, but like maybe you kind of know something's going to happen. I think the death card also maybe says this to you, because you're aware that something's changing. Like, maybe you don't know exactly what, but it's changing and you feel this shift in the energy. The other deck has 7 of Swords here, and I really hate seeing this in a love reading, but I also kind of get that maybe it's just for those of you who do know each other, maybe at this exact moment you're not being truthful about feelings? Things that might be relevant: Taurus, Libra, Scorpio, October and November. Halloween. 13 or 31. 3, 7, Beetlejuice, I don't know! That black and white suit is so prominent to me today on that card! It always stands out but I never really thought about beetlejuice before, so lemme know if that resonates! Pile 2: Athos

Cards: Ace of Wands, 4 of Wands, Knight of Cups, The Hierophant, Judgement reversed, The Hanged Man With this one, I feel like someone in this is ignoring their feelings. Like, with the Hanged Man being here I definitely see that it's someone literally hanging back and thinking about things. And with Judgement reversed, I see that it's like a waiting period. So, I think this is an established connection, but like, nothings happening. Like, maybe not even communication, or like if there is, it's like you're not really talking. At least, not about what's going on between the two of you. And also Skin to Skin came on, and the first line in this song is interesting to me because it's "I'm certain that I'll circle back to you", so it's like neither of you are too worried, but maybe there's some frustration (but I don't really see that in the cards. They all kind of feel super chill, so I think whoever this is, they're really chill lol) There's also another line that makes me l think about this but also, the knight of cups gives me this vibe: "I know that you're so preoccupied..." And like, again, I feel this stagnation but like it's a chill one. Like you're both accepting that maybe it's supposed to happen? Just not now. And, so like this "preoccupied" person is like the hanged man, hanging back and thinking things through. I don't think it's that they're unsure. I think they know how they feel (the stars and the moons in her hair on the hangedman card definitely brings this to mind, like this knowing of the unknown, but also having hope, so it's like whoever this is, knows what they're not sure of if that makes sense! Same with the judgement card but she also has the sun on it! So she's holding all the hope, mysteries and happiness in her arms!!!) Ace of wands is like this new passion. Like, maybe after stagnancy is this moment where you two can express this passion, and with the Knight of Cups, I see that too. But, he's not moving on a horse like the other decks usually have. He's just sitting and look at that cup but looking really kind of...He looks like he's pouting honestly, but I don't get that from this. Like, he's looking at this covered cup and it's got stars, so again that hope is there. He has that hope, but it's covered up, so it's kept to him for now if that makes sense. But, with this ace of wands, I see a new start and like i think it's this start where he opens up that cup and out pours all those thoughts the hanged man had. And, the 4 of wands suggests this harmony that's coming with this. Like, you two just click and you balance each other out. And I'm sure you both know this. With this deck, sometimes you can read the looks on their faces two ways, like how the deck explains the card and also maybe a different way, so I kind of always can see two ways of looking at the faces. Some look sad but could also be contemplating things.  This card is definitely one of those cards. This one is about bringing difficulties to an end with alliances, I don't really think this was that difficult? Like, maybe I'm not getting the whole story. Maybe this period of stagnation has been a long time and you're both just tired of not seeing each other now or talking more, but like, I guess this is kind of you two coming together and bringing an end to this period of nothing. And the look on the one girls face, the one in the yellow dress, she looks tired but she looks so into this other girl, so like I think that's kind of what's going to happen. One day you're both are going to just simultaneously agree that you're done with this nothing and want something? Like, I don't think you're going to say it before deciding it but once it's decided you BOTH are going to be opening up your star cups and pour it all out. Bottom deck energy for this is the Death card and the high priestess. I wasn't going to mention it, but I almost feel like for a few of you, you should check out pile 1, mostly because Death was in that pile but also the High Priestess was bottom deck energy for that one too (just a different deck). But, these tell me that there's going to be a change. Like, I said you're going to get tired of this stagnation, and I think it's an end of a cycle within this particular relationship. And the high priestess brings back that idea of "I'm certain I'll circle back to you..." where there's a knowing that this isn't really done. It's just at a standstill. So, yeah. I think this stagnation will end. I don't know WHEN, I don't get a when. But, I don't think it's going to be FOREVER from now, especially because you did get 3 major arcana! Also, wands feels quicker and you got the ace of wands! So I feel like it's kind of a "whenever" kind of thing, which isn't very helpful. It could be tomorrow or next year, ya know? Though, as I was writing this the song 12 Weeks by Movements came on! So! For someone it MIGHT be 12 Weeks. It's interesting though, because the end of the song is something like "Fall in love and fall away", which I don't see that as an end, again kind of like you two caught feelings and then were put in a stand still? But, also with that 4 of wands card, it really feels like everything around them falls away around them, so maybe that's just kind of how you two are together. Like, you talk and there could be other people there, but it all falls away. You could be in a group conversation, but for some reason it feels like all the words you both say are pointed towards the other rather than the group? Again, take what resonates. If you know no one where your connection is like this than I really do not think this is your pile. Things that are relevant: Celestial bodies (like the sun, the moon, stars), butterflies (specifically pink and purple), Sagittarius, Taurus

Pile 3: D’Artagnan

Cards: Justice, The Star(s), Queen of Swords, 8 of Pentacles, 3 of Swords reversed, 3 of cups Justice was the first card to fall out, and immediately I knew it was about a group who got the short end of the stick or something when it comes to love. Like, I hear, short end of the stick, like. Okay, so Queen of Swords is always described as like a woman alone who's been scorned, but I usually don't go by that because I'm sure there are plenty of people out there who are Queen of Sword types who haven't really had issues with love, they're just kind of That Way. But, like with Justice, I definitely see this as someone who was hurt in the past by love. Like, again. Short end of the stick. New Song D by the Front Bottoms is playing and there's this part in the bridge where he talks about how someone sold him a bike for $50 when the brakes weren't working, so like he was cheated out of $50 when he thought maybe it was worth $25 ? Like, Okay. So, with this, I'm getting that he was cheated money out of this, right? And maybe that is the case for some of you, but I'm getting more of an energy cheat if that makes sense. Like, you put a lot of energy into someone and a situation, and all they gave back was 1/4 of what you gave, and I'm getting that because I think maybe they thought they were giving you more (1/2 but still not enough), but they weren't, and you were just cheated out of this and left feeling drained because it was all one sided. And, I'm not saying this person didn't feel anything for you, I mean, they might have felt something but weren't able to give back the same amount because of things going on in their life. Or they were just like that. And there's another part in this song where he says "You wouldn't start because I wouldn't stop" and maybe it's also like you were giving too much even for them to like, take? Maybe it was just too much on their end and couldn't receive that much and too much for you to give so then you're both left with a disappointing situation. I also see 8 of pentacles kind of confirming this, like so much hard work was put into it on your end, but not enough to make it balanced. And it is NOT your fault. Like I feel the need to tell you that you have a big heart and that it's not your fault that someone else couldn't accept it the way you needed them to. 3 of swords reversed tells me that you're healing, though. Like, this happened and it probably really hurt but now you're healing. For some, because there are 2 3's, I think this was a case of being cheated on, but I don't think that's for everyone. Like, I really feel more like this was an unbalanced give and take situation. But, with the Justice here, I see that it WILL be balanced and whatever is coming in for you, will be more balanced. I almost feel, though, like this pile is less about what's coming and more about how you'll be doing better? Like, what's coming is really good and balanced, but also, you're healing, and I think it's always really nice to be able to look back at a heartbreak and not feel as bad about it as you did before. Like, sure it's probably always going to give a pang, but like with time, it heals. And, I know you probably wanted so badly for this to work out with this person, and I'm so sorry it didn't. Trust me, All I've ever known is unrequited love, so I really get that feeling of that realization when it becomes clear it's not going to work. One deck's bottom card was the Ace of Swords, so again, like I think this was that clarity you had about it not working, but I also see it as you seeing that it's just that this was not meant for you and that there's something better. And, that better is the star and justice. Like, this new person is going to bring in a lot of hope an balance. Like, this star card has two people on it, and it kind of looks like they're balancing out, right? So, yes. Definitely a lot of balance. And this person, I think, is going to be a lot of fun. The 3 of cups in this reading, to me, is more about how I think you two are going to hit it off in a friendly way first. And like, this might not even be a romantic love. It could just be a really good friend you make or have that's with you through your healing. But either way, platonic or not, I think this person is going to be someone you can lean on in this tough period, but also someone you can have fun with. The same song, new song d, has a part in the chorus where he says "I fell down, you propped me up" and I see this as being how your relationship will go. When someones down, the other will prop them up.But this isn't going to be all take and no give like this last person. No, again, it's going to be super balanced. Bottom deck energy for the other deck was Knight of Wands and in my last reading I compared him to D'Artagnan in the Three Musketeers and I think when he's not off trying to save the world, he's a really fun dude. Also, this is kind of weird and I'm going to have to make sure in the picture I take I get one of this Knight of Wands, because on the top border there's this weird like squiggle shapes, but it looks to me like...bodies? (It's kind of like that with the Queen of Swords too, with the top border?) Like bodies doing yoga lmao but like. I think you two are going to be physical (like! not in a sexual sense unless you're old enough and consenting!!), but more in a, touchy, huggy sense. So again, that propping up, but like physically and mental propping up. But, also, like maybe you two are always kind of touching. Like, shoulders next to each other, knees colliding, hand holding. Oof. That sounds so cute! I'm a little jealous. OH! This is also kind of weird, but in the same card behind him are this shapes that look like fleur-de-lis! And that's so weird considering that I think of D'Artagnan, a musketeer when I see this card! Ah! Anyway, I just see this as super healing for you, whoever this is. The shapes also kind of remind me of phoenix's, so! Maybe that's a message there. Like, emerging from the ashes of your former self? This is weird, because the next song that came on was Sour, a collab by 1990nowhere, Olivver the Kid and others, but I think that's interesting because maybe it goes with the past for you, like it soured. Like it looked sweet and then it soured? Then Are you Bored Yet? by Wallows came on so taking that literal, like you grew tired of how it was going. So I'm not sure if anyone resonates with those two songs, but I thought they seemed significant. Possibly relevant: Libra, Aquarius, Musketeers, fleur-de-lis, yoga, 1990, 3, 8 Pile 4: Porthos

Cards: Knight of cups, 2 of cups, 7 of wands, the lovers, 6 of swords, King of Pentacles I wasn't going to do a pile 4, but thought I should and like, yeah I'm glad I did because this feels like something someone needs to hear. So, someone here is leaving something. I think maybe you might want to read my last pick a pile I posted on here about what you need to hear. I definitely think this group showed up in that one. So, again, someone is leaving something, but I keep wanting to type someone! Ahh! Sorry! But, maybe there is someone leaving someone? I definitely have the song Scrawny by Wallows stuck in my head so maybe you're leaving a "scrawny motherfucker with a cool hairstyle"? lol or not! Maybe that's just a song being stuck in my head because it was in there earlier today, but? Like? Maybe it was meant to come back around for this reading. Anyway, I get this idea from 6 of swords because that can be about a spiritual/mental journal, but also sometimes a physical one. So, like mentally and physically leaving a situation. Also, I've read that 6 in tarot is about journeys, and we got two 6's (6 of Swords and the lovers), and even though the lovers is about unity, I think it's also leaving that life before that unity behind? So, I read that into this whole, you're leaving something (or someone in this is leaving something or someone, so it could be this person coming towards you leaving something). Also, 8 of cups was on the bottom of one of the decks, and that again is about leaving something, like mentally/spiritually. But, like, this has cups so there's more of an emotional element to it. Like, leaving something that wasn't fulfilling you, going towards that 9 of cups wish fulfillment, right? So, there is that energy here, and like, I kind of feel like 9 of Cups should have shown up too, because I almost feel like whoever is coming towards you is kind of a wish come true. So, with knight of cups, i kind of read it like I did for another pile, but maybe more into his expression than i had for that one, where he looks kind of pouty. For that pile I said it was like he was kind of waiting to open up this cup that is in front of him that he's looking at. It has stars on it, so it's like his cup of hope? And the knight of cups is usually seen as a love offer, (though I typed over so again, I think someone out there is leaving someone?) so like this star cup, when he opens it, will have that offer for you? Like his heart is in there for you (not physically like his organ lmao). And with 7 of wands, I almost wonder if maybe you're defensive to let it in or maybe they're even too defensive to open up that cup? Someone here is defensive, but I don't think that's needed because I see so much stability with this. Like, we have the King of Pentacles here. So, not only do I think one or both of you are doing okay like financially (like, able to pay the bills and maybe have a nice roof over your head), but I also just see it as stable. Like, they're a shelf and your love is safe to place on. Does that make sense? Omg I'm so corny in this pile I love it. Both the Lover's and two of cups are these soft cards. Like, physically, these two cards from these decks look so soft. The love in these cards, guys. Phew. The two of cups shows this lady kind of hanging on this man, and they have these soft, fond gazes at each other. And then, with the lovers in the other deck, it's so sweet. She's kissing the other girl's cheek and they just look like they're content in the moment? So, I definitely see this as something fulfilling for you both, like you're both gonna be such suckers for each other. Probably constantly getting those heart eyes. Like, think Evie and O'Connell heart eyes, if you've ever seen The Mummy from 1999. Like, the looks they give each other. I'm totally getting those vibes. Maybe you two are going to be really snarky to each other too? But you’ll find it so endearing. Another thing I want to add is that I think you two are going to be perfectly balanced like literally Yin and Yang. I mean, one girl on the lovers card is all white and the other is all black. And then on the two of cups, They're kind of contrasted in terms of hair. Also! Bottom card energy for one deck was Justice, so yes. Definitely balance and yin and yang. I think this also goes back to the King of Pentacles, like I almost even get that Two of Pentacles energy of balancing out things, but being able to do so whereas the other twos kind of are about choices. But this one isn't. And it's weird, because sometimes the lovers can be read as choices, but I don't here. Not with this pile. And maybe there is a choice about leaving something/someone, but like I think once that's done and over with, this love comes in. And it could just be simple like a mindset? Like with all the cups here, I definitely think it could be a mindset. Like one that makes you super emotional, so maybe this is an existing relationship that just needs like a change? That's probably for a few of you, but for others, I see that this is something that comes after a shift in mind, or like a physical one. I mean, the song Make Way by The Front Bottoms was playing here, and like, that song is kind of about making space for the new? "I make way for the expensive things in my head." And, I've kind of gotten this Death Card vibe with every pile, and at first I was like not getting that with this pile, but idk, with 6 of swords and 8 of cups, I kind of get that? Like ending something to begin something? Ending with the song Nobody Gets Me (Like You) by Wallows, and I think this is what its going to feel like with this person. This pile is so cute. :) Things that could be relevant: Gemini, Libra, water signs, Capricorn (Pentacles are earth, but I really get a cap vibe with this one today), heart eyes, The Mummy lol

[basketballandtextbooks]

things i love abt dougie

he’s a little shit (”simpsons did it! simpsons did it!” istg)

he’s tiny, how can you not love someone that tiny. you guys realize that he’s currently 8-9 years old and he’s not as tall as butters and the others were at 8-9 years old. he’s canonically short for his age. someone protect this tiny child

he’s a trekie, i love him and relate to him so mcuh, lets talk abt old star trek movies together

he’s a completionist with an obsessive memory for the fandoms he’s a part of, it’s amazing

he’s all about getting to the truth and uncovering your secrets but for is own ends

he will help you bury a body if he loves you and thats so freaking hardcore

he’s logical but he also lacks self awareness

pretty sure its hinted in canon that he’s bullied

SOMEONE GIVE HIM A HUG DAMNIT

....im going to have my kyle protect the small ginger boy someday

he canonically has no soul because he’s a ginger and i love him even more for being a soulless husk

he’s so innocent and sweet

he’s a bastard

he’s normally unflappble but sometimes he gets super scared and its the most heart wrenching thing ever to watch someone who’s normally so composed lose his shit

he’s a terrible terrible part of phone destroyer and everyone who has dougie in their deck needs to get shot in the face

on that note, the combo of a dougie card and paladin butters is one of the best combos in the game, their love is real

[tarotnoob]

Hello, been reading through your posts for the past few days! If Im not too late, can I get an individual reading? thank you :-)

Okay, I’ve already read up on most of the cards, so I’ll try to make all the potential messages as concise as possible.

I was so uncertain about the archetype oracle deck for some reason. I just wanted some cards to describe you so this is probably the fourth pair that came out - I think first was visionary/engineer which come out so much, I was like hmm SUS. But similar cards came out anyway, so Midas and Priest sound alright because there was always this tendency of one spiritual card and then one creative or potentially “negative” card but since Midas and All that Glitters both came out from separate decks, I feel like there’s a message there.

The tarot cards:

Page of wands Ace of swords 9 of cups

To me, this looks like you’ve recently set your eyes on some type of goal/wish/desire. Something new. There’s even looking to be like (because of ace of swords and the 8 of swords peeking at the back under Chariot), that maybe in recent past there... wasn’t this sense of confidence or direction, but now there is. It could have only recently started as an actual situation or simply an idea or desire in your mind. The page of wands is enthusiastic, creative, filled with that sort of childish delight - it can even be about receiving a message. The ace of swords is determination to set out toward a goal, possibly after recently experiencing the end of a harder lesson or tough time. Nine of cups is usually related to a wish or desire, something you are or want to manifest and even good luck. IMO, this has good vibes and the feel of starting something new in life that you want and are excited about, even determined to get. 

All that glitters worries me because I could read this plus midas as starting an endeavor that will be successful, likely in financial regard or material, etc... but the meaning of that card is more about things looking better than what they really are and being wary of status. The shadow side to midas is also - hoarding money or emotions and being obsessed w/ a loss of status. So, I’m obligated to say something like - if this concerns the future goal, just make sure it’s really what you want, your intentions are aligned, that, I guess, it’s spiritually beneficial to you. However, this could also be about the past circumstance you went through in which something you had/wanted/a person/situation wasn’t what you thought it was or it turned out not to be as good as you expected, you learned from that, and now have a new goal or I guess the cards could be describing this whole journey in which you went after something only to realize it wasn’t as good as you expected... but that would be kind of lame, so I think it’s more maybe this is in the past, you learned a lesson that made you realize what you really want and now you’re set on a better path that you’re already manifesting.

The fox oracle is like that, as well since it talks about not being able to understand light without darkness - so again a sense of having to go through shit or... having to discover what you DON’T want or desire so that in the future (or now) you can manifest what you DO want that’s right for you.

Priest talks about being a channel for spiritual messages - this can be that your intuition is pretty sharp (this also fits with ace of swords), or even that you could have some type of... creative talent or discernment that’s kind of a divine talent. IMO, you may have a creative talent but I feel like you’re learning more when it comes to people... who they really are, like you’re able to read them. I’d also guess that you have some type of life purpose that may involve helping people through... your existence or a talent... you could just be a person who frequently helps others. I do think it’s possible you have a talent... or skill that could lead to a very successful career... but I do want to advise you not to let anyone take advantage of you. 

Estafania oracle “chains, bondage, release” - this could also be about the past thing, b/c it also feels like the 8 of swords card, which is a lot like mental bondage, anxiety, fear, limitations you place on yourself. I feel like you have or are on your way to busting free of this...  and you have/need to release that where it belongs: the past, so that you can move on toward this next goal - but do so with more discernment than before - or well, you probably already will/have anyway. 

Energy oracle - also gives me this idea that some sort of new inspiration has hit you that’s putting you back onto the path where you belong, and toward a goal...one that’s more in line with your purpose/path.

Welcome - limitless magic can be about manifestation and guides showing up can be all kinds of messages or people who show up at the right time to teach you various lessons and put you on a path...

Chariot was back of deck, and that also gives me the sense of... feeling a lot more focused on something. Usually it’s a career goal, it’s determined, driven energy. It can even represent travel or sometimes home.

So intuitively I feel a couple things strongly - so all that glitters keeps nagging me and it makes me feel this is mostly about being discerning about people... I do think you’re also being asked to trust your intuition, as well, as in let it guide you to your right path. Maybe some goals seem good because of xyz (more money?), but perhaps they don’t/won’t feel right. Like, say this job pays super well, but it’s not a satisfying job, perhaps the cards want to say... if it doesn’t feel right, don’t let the superficial/materialistic veneer of whatever sway you. This goes for jobs as well as people. I feel strongly compelled to tell you that what you need to do most is trust your gut, trust your feelings, feel pulled to what EXCITES you and brings you joy, and when you go after it, you need to be determined and focused... 

The other message is again to acknowledge that any struggles or darkness have been there to teach you something about yourself - to discern what’s good for you or what you want or to prepare you to be strong enough or skilled enough to get exactly what you desire. I think that rn you are probably seeing some type of synchronicities or signs or even people are messaging you or being used as a means to convey certain messages to point you to the path, as well... 

To me these are good vibe cards so I would read these and think you aren’t particularly gloomy, that you are relatively optimistic and upbeat and when things do go off the rails, you typically get back onto your feet fairly quickly. The only thing I worry about is if there’s a type of pattern involved there if it’s people where the same thing keeps happening over and over again in some way, which is why you’re being taught discernment so that instead of it happening again, you can use your intuition to learn from it and avoid it, but maybe you’ve already done this - 

I do think midas/all that glitters are related to the goal tho... like the goal seems to be about... money or finances or nice things...  which nothing wrong with wanting... stable income and such...  just, yknow... be careful and make sure it’s really what you want.

i really really get a strong sense that you’re being guided and watched over at this time. like i know we all should have guides, but i feel like they’re super close and loud rn and really focused on putting you in a certain direction and have been working behind the scenes in very specific ways to put you exactly where you are or about to be in the near future...  like maybe there’s a particular song you’re attached to rn or keep hearing that gets you pumped about this goal? Or... music is part of the goal...  or maybe I just need to say they’ll especially speak to you through music.

What else can I say. Tarot numbers are 1, 9 which to me would be a message about the self and... spiritual philanthropy...  so again... it seems your intuition and relationship to spirituality or doing good in the world are part of this message. There’s also a 7, which is about lessons and searching for deeper meaning and connection, understanding about life... so it could be that you search for deeper understanding through... spiritual... the lifestyle or in particular you’re just a naturally spiritual person who finds connections to people and things in a spiritual way... sees deeper patterns in all sorts of relations to ... whatever. You might also be fairly lucky. 

In terms of color/chakras... well there is some yellow/gold, so solar plexus... maybe a bit of orange (sacral) tho it’s mostly yellow...  there is some indigo and purple so third eye and crown (your intuition and spiritual juju). And then a big blot of green in the midas card (heart).

This reiterates your strong intuition/spiritual abilities or connections... the green makes me think of the 9 in that... so you have spiritual talent or serve as a channel like priest card says but you may have quite a big heart (hopefully not blocked), but when we get hurt by people, we can close off. However, I think this shows that you’re rather compassionate and giving toward people, which perhaps might be way some of them can fool you from time to time.

And the yellow may be blocked or open as solar plexus is will, determination, confidence, well balanced emotions and health...  

You can look up those chakras online and see if they seem blocked or not, but the point is these particular chakras/qualities will be important to your path.

I would say it’s something like... your search for personal empowerment (solar plexus) and your path will revolve around your spiritual/intuitive side... and that you’ll also be led in the right direction by your big heart. Though this could also lead you to getting hurt or taken advantage of and would affect your solar plexus or heart chakras... so... anywho.

I feel like your solar p is actually okay b/c i get the sense from the tarot that you have the ability to get back on your feet and keep going forward as opposed to being like wow that past thing sucked so i’m going to live in a cave forever, always afraid to try that again bc i might get hurt... i don’t really see that here. But that’s not to say you haven’t ever or aren’t currently doing shadow work or haven’t experienced tough times. I just think you have a better mindset/stronger mindset than others to get through it and not be as negative.

In conclusion, keep up with that focused energy... if the goal feels like it’s in line with your intuition, go for it. Use your intuition on people and situations to make sure it vibes right. Be careful of situations or people that seem too good to be true or just... doing stuff for the wrong reason... and be really open to signs right now, particularly through music... and I think try to keep positive and stay high vibe, stay away from folks who aren’t... 

And that’s about it :)

[descendantofthesparrow]

Encore - Part of Your World - Harry Hook x reader - part 7 - discovered

=

you sighed, tilting your head to crack your neck, your feet aching and your back killing you.

another day at you aunts bakery, she was in the back, taking care of a special order *cough* welcome cake for Harry *cough*

you had worked at her *Starkiller* bakery since you were 14, working a 4 hours a day shift after school, getting paid 15 an hour and working 4 days a week with Fridays and weekends off.

it was how you paid for your dirt-cheap but lavish apartment.

yawning you grabbed a stool and dragged it over to you, plopping down on it, leaning against the front counter, today seemed to be a slow day, hardly any costumers, and luckily no paparazzi.

you let your weight fall, chin hitting your knuckles as you fell against the counter. you blew a stray hair away from your eyes, tucking it behind your ear.

the door dinged, you sat up, putting on your customer service voice. “hello~ and welcome to Starkiller bakery, how may I help you?”

“This place was named after StarWars wasn’t it?” you knew that voice, your eyes snapped open, and there stood china ann McClain, you knew it wasn’t uma, due to the definitely- not ocean green hair and the fact it wasn’t long.

“pfft yeah, my aunts obsessed with it, she really liked force awakens and named her bakery after it.” China smiled, nodded, glancing over your front end selection.

“ill have that” she pointed at a chocolate croissant, you smiled and nodded, grabbing the tongs and parchment paper bag “how many?”

“two, im waiting for a friend” you nodded, quickly stashing two in the bag and ringing china up.

“two fifty” chinas brows raised, smiling slightly “wow cheap” you grinned, tapping the card button. “yep, 1.25 each”

“ ‘ey China, i think i blew our cove’r” you paused, Harry’s voice flowing through the shop, but you knew Harry was in his world taking remedial goodness.

you locked eyes with him, Thomas Doherty, who brow rose as you stared. china turned, handing him the bag “are you serious Tommy? what did you do?”

“I couldn’t help it!! there was a little girl who recognized me and asked for a picture! I couldn’t refuse she was so cute!” china snorted, rolling her eyes.

“whatever, also shes the one i saw with your dopple-ganger” you froze, shoulders crunching up as Thomas whipped around to stare at you.

“Really?” you swallowed harshly as Thomas took long strides towards you, leaning in closely/ “look lass, i have a few questions and suspicions, and i want yeh to answer them truthfully, please”

you nodded slowly, backing away from him.

“are yeh, or are yeh not dating someone who looks like meh?” you sighed, you knew you wouldn’t be able to get out of this so you just nodded, Thomas seemed surprised at that, considering he leaned back and rose his brows.

“Okay, didn’t think ye would admit that easily?” china groaned from the background.

“Hey (y/n)! FG let me off….early...shit” harry was in the doorway of the bakery, face clenched in a wince, Thomas whipped around, jaw-dropping as he stared at harry.

“oh shit” you and harry muttered together,  paling as china looked from Harry to Thomas. and Thomas and Harry simply stared at each other.

“who are yeh” Thomas’ accent thickened, a glare setting on his face, striding towards harry. Harry’s arm whipped around the curved end of a hook at Thomas’ throat, a dangerous grin on his face.

“harry hook, pleasure teh meet ye ‘Tommy’” 

you sighed, walking around the counter and walking up to harry, slowly taking his hand in your and slowly loosening his grip on the hook.

“harry that’s enough, threatening them won’t help us in keeping out of sight” harry kept glaring at Thomas, but relaxed at your touch, backing away from him and breathing deeply.

“sorry luve,just...yeh know” he muttered, keeping his eyes on china and Thomas.

=

“so let me get this straight” China began, after you explained everything. “so you somehow got teleported to their world just a little before descendants 2, then you and Harry fell in love, then you got sent back, then again you got teleported to D3 and now you and Harry can freely visit each other with those...keys?”

you shugged, Harry sinking lower into his chair, pouting and crossing his arms “yeah pretty much.”

you had sat in the far corner of the bakery, explaining to China and Thomas about how Harry was in your world and how you had met him.

“so how long has it been since Harrys been here?” Thomas asked, he had calmed down since almost attacking harry and Harry had chilled slightly too, but kept his guard up.

“Ummm” you mumbled, tapping the table “about a month? maybe?” the two Disney actors nodded, Thomas, holding a staring contest with Harry, Harry giving a death stare.

“Alright, you know what?” you stood, grasping Harrys wrist and shaking it “you stop that, he has done nothing to provoke you glaring at him like that!” harry huffed, pouting and standing, chair screeching as he pushed back.

“whatever, im goin’ home, bye.” he left abruptly, tearing his wrist from your grip and stomping away. you sighed, turning to the two actors “sorry about him, hes….extra”

Thomas snorted “I know, I made ‘im tha’ way” China rolled her eyes, standing and patting your shoulder.

“Thanks for explaining, the whole “two Thomas’ was freaking me out” you smiled, reaching out for a fist bump, which China smiled at and bumped her fist against yours.

“and thank you for being so understanding, and not freaking out” Thomas interrupted you “oh im hella freaked out, im just really good at staying calm on the outside”

you snorted, standing to make your way to the back, “kay, I gotta go back to work”

“Alright, see ya (y/n)”

as they left a thought hit you. ‘see ya?’

=

you stepped onto the deck of the lost revenge, eyeing harry as he aggressively attacked a lower crewmember with his blade.

sweat covered his back, the muscles tense as he spun and slashed at the poor crewmember.

“(y/n) what the hell did you say to him?” uma growled from your side, you looked at her from the corner of your eye and shrugged.

“i don’t know, but Thomas, Harry’s actor, found out about us, so it might be that?”

uma sighed, placing her fingers in her mouth and giving a piercing whistle “ALRIGHT, TRAININGS OVER, WASH UP AND GET BACK TO WORK”

the crew dispersed, harry standing alone on the deck, breathing heavily, hand clenched tightly around his weapons.

“go talk to him, if he keeps this...whatever this is, its gonna get hectic for all of us” you nodded, striding across the deck toward your boyfriend.

“harry” his breathing hitched, his shoulders rising as you placed your hand on his back “are you okay?”

“do yeh like him” a whisper escaped him, making you frown, stepping around him, you gasped as you could see tears lining his eyes.

“like who? you muttered, cupping Harry’s cheek, tilting your head in worry.

“Thomas” Harry hissed “ye-ye were staring at him the entire time and-and” you stood on your toes, cutting off harry with a kiss.

Harry’s shoulders slumped, hook and sword clattering to the floor, pressing his lips desperately into yours, arms wrapping around your waist.

“harry” you breathed as you pulled away “I love you, and besides, you are a lot more handsome than he is, and also my age” Harry made a face.

“lass we look the exact same?” you snorted, running your hands through his hair, ignoring the sweat on his scalp.

“there’s a difference hooky, I can describe it, but you two look different”

Harry shook his head, wiping his eyes and slumping against you “whatever lass” you could hear the slight amusement in his voice, so you pushed him a little, towards the showers.

“you smell go shower” harry gave a chilling grin, wrapping his arms around you and getting his sweat all over you, rubbing his head into your cheek.

“Harry!” you squealed, escaping his grasp and bolting towards his room, Harry following close behind.

“nooooo”

“yes!”

--end of part 7--