#im so sad writing the end portion made me so sad

[carlos-in-glasses]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you for the tag @chicgeekgirl89 @theghostofashton @sugdenlovesdingle @ladytessa74 @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad @lemonlyman-dotcom @bonheur-cafe @reyesstrand @orchidscript @alrightbuckaroo @liminalmemories21 @strandnreyes @welcometololaland @rmd-writes @jesuisici33 ❤️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Twenty! <- Linking to the masterlist I recently made because I love the banner! -> This is a direct link to my Ao3.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

270,729

3. What fandoms do you write for

Only 9-1-1 Lonestar. It’s hard to imagine writing for anything else, but time shall tell.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Chasers 🏃🏽 When Soulmates Swim 💦 Afterglow of a Supernova ⭐ The Heart Behind the Shield ❤️‍🩹 The Light of Our Life 🦎

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I sure do. The idea of not responding breaks my heart a little, and I always feel bad for keeping people waiting, although I do. I like to respond chattily if it matches the commenter’s energy, and with a lot of gratitude, but on weekdays I usually end up in a headachy stupor so end up pushing responses until I feel awake. I’m so grateful that people take the time to read and comment. I have to tell them. I don’t even know how to explain how it feels to receive positive comments on my writing after writing into the void for so long before I tried my hand at fanfic. 

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don’t think any of them are truly angsty because they all end on a note of TK and Carlos loving each other through anything, but it’s probably Sweet Dreams and Flying Machines because it’s a 3x08 coda and TK is grieving. Or The Center of the Maze because the last chapter is partly a 4x18 coda Carlos is grieving for Gabriel. These boys have been through a lot!

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

With Infinity Folded into it – plot being that right after TK proposes, Carlos reflects on the first time they said ‘I love you’. It’s fluff all the way down. But I also want to throw The Ruins of Wonderland (breakup/reconciliation AU) and Release the Hand to Relax the Animal (smut city) into the mix.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I was recently visited by the Carlos-hater fairy, as a few of us have been. It stung. But mainly I came away feeling really sad for the person behind that account.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

The kind where Carlos faceplants the headboard. The kind where they break the bed. The kind where they have tantric sex for hours. The kind where things are inside Carlos while he’s inside TK. The kind where they frot despite potentially being overlooked by ghosts (not as dumb as it sounds).

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I haven’t, but I’d love to write a Tarlos fic that heavily involves Kevin and Captain Holt from B99. I’d find it challenging to get Kevin and Holt’s voices right, so inspiration will really need to grip me.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yes – I was alerted by a lovely reader that portions of one of my fics had been plagiarised. I had to contact Ao3. A lot of people in the fandom really rallied and helped in various ways when it happened and I was lost at what to do. I want to say a big thank you because you shone like a beautiful bright light. It’s not at all flattering to be plagiarised – it feels absolutely terrible.   

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No but I’d like to! It’s a question of finding the time (and agreeing ideas and how to go about it) so as to not let the collaborator down.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Tarlos. And may it never find land.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I typically only work on one thing at a time – so I don’t have an unfinished WIP gathering dust. I hope I’m able to write and post all the ideas I have eventually.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I’ve been told more than once: Imagery, dialogue, characterisation, and carrying themes through.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Plotting and the more technical stuff. Being a good creative writer doesn’t necessarily translate to perfect grammar and syntax and all that jazz (I did very poorly in school across the board, which I’m sure is a surprise to nobody). I spend a long time editing my fics and fixing things post-production. What gets uploaded to Ao3 is the result of many rethinks and rescue missions. 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I would like to work some Spanish into my current WIP (and in fact I’m planning for it to have a Spanish title) I think it’s completely fine to include other languages within fics. If anything it can provide context.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

9-1-1 Lonestar – my beloved, my first and only.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

The 90k story known as Flashback Fic (for now), which I’ll start posting in November, is my favourite fic because I genuinely think it’s the best thing I’ve written ever and I can’t wait to share it. I’ve been exploring the pasts of TK and Carlos in a way I’ve wanted to do for a long time, and linking it to the present, wherein Carlos is has been seeking Gabriel’s killer and floundering. For posted fics, When Soulmates Swim was the most fun I’ve had with characterisation and I loved spending time with TK and Carlos in my head throughout. Chapter 4, Lover’s Leap, was challenging to write but I love how it came out. Feedback on the ‘big moment’ in that chapter has been amazing. But I’m also really proud of The Center of the Maze, which I think is the most ‘beautiful’ and consistently so. I feel weird saying that about my own writing, but I felt really good about it during a re-read (I don’t often re-read them).

I'm not entirely sure who has/hasn't done this so open tag (please tag me back!) and if you haven't done it already/want to: @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @taralaurel @heartstringsduet @paperstorm @rosedavid @chaotictarlos @catanisspicy @noxsoulmate @three-drink-amy @sanjuwrites @lightningboltreader @goodways @wandering-night19 @mikibwrites - no pressure/ignore at your leisure 💘

[fairyhaos]

wahahaaaaa hello once again, i see you've seen the ask from then!! good news, i have been a-okay for the day <3 and i managed sleep a bit and then stayed awake 'til now. it's 13:57 as im writing this. thank you, coffee. another piece of news! finished the first portion of a project and im sidetracking now. (also yes. you're right- decent amount of sleep > sleeping at a decent time, better to get that sleep in bc the time you sleep at may affect the sched. maybe. possibly)

things have been fine now!! it's surprisingly p quiet and now i'm the one initiating convos. that's been cool /g. also saw the shua hours when they dropped and while i like- don't ever reach that degree (i mean this is the nicest way possible bc i admire dedication) of missing anybody, i do get general missing him </3 he's just so. shua. there's no way to describe him for me lmfao

hopefully whatever made you down last night is gone now. otherwise, i'll be forced to advance write funny haha content for joshua that'll come in the far future. or just general fluff, who knows how that ep will end up,,

; 🌙 (e (2))

ahh that's good to hear!! oh youve been working on a project 👀 that's very interesting haha i hope it goes well ^^ im glad things have been going well <3

honestly there are times where i miss him so bad it's actually a little scary, but last night i kinda needed the comfort that he can bring me? and opening missing shua hours allows me to ramble and spam about him as much as i need haha

im doing okay now! idk what actually happened last night i just suddenly became really sad but everything is better now ^^ i hope you're doing good too!

[helloescapist]

hiya! im the anon with the spider mother ask! i've read it like 10 times now, it's so goood - i love the name chinatsu and its meaning (a thousand summers), referencing the reader's desire to give spider mother as long of a life as possible. In fact, it kinda reminds me of a quote from the movie "A Monster Calls", where the (dying) mother of the mc says "I wish I had a hundred years, a hundred years I could give to you."

speaking of which, why did the reader have to die 😔 now I'm sad lmao

at least chinatsu is safe and alive (for now). I headcanon that she was found by lady Tamayo and turned into a human alongside Nezuko

-Vee

Hello Vee!

I am SO SO happy to hear you loved it <3. Ah brought my heart so much joy!

For a moment there, I lived in fear that I had exposed you to Sunrise Countdown Arc spoilers, and I nearly cried! *phew*. But for anyone who *may* not know, I'll do a see more.

*clears throat*

So, just like you may have seen in my Parallel Paths shorts for Gyutaro, for some requests, it's easier for me to create a character to depict and allow it to gude me to its story. [I sound cracked I know...]

Anyways, for this character, she was so heavily based off of the tales of Ubume. A good portion of the Japanese depictions arose during 1185-1603, following the Heian era in which Muzan was a human. Because of this, it felt fitting as a woman who knows of Muzan's weaker points, much like Kokushibo. For me, it made more since to her to have been created during this time frame... which means, I think she would have at best lived like Yushiro.

I ADORE the idea that Chinatsu being forced from her side as a latch ditch effort, to be found by Tamayo, oh my heart. Especially with the line you shared from A Monster Calls-- perfection. Which to me, proves the fem!Uppermoonreader's sacrifice, that much more important. It signified how much she cherished Chinatsu, that for her, the little demon was not "Spider mother," but her own daughter. The truth of her maternal love the reason why she would be willing to sacrifice everything if it just meant her child had a chance. If she had been saved by Tamayo, I think the reader still would have died, or been forced to live like Yushiro... living after her child had passed would have only been a crueler fate (at least to me).

Also, I admit, I tend to lean towards angst endings. 😂 I'm a guilty shit. I'm sorry lol.

buuuuuut--- just think... in the modern world, perhaps they've been reunited. 🥺 I wonder if I can find time in my schedule to write.... no. no... maybe? Maybe. Thank you for the ask <3

[tinyandbony]

diary day 1.

Today was hard but rewarding. I have been thinking about losing weight since the new year literally every single day. I managed to eat well for the first 7 days, but then it was my birthday and ever since I just pigged out basically. My stable weight has been around 59-60 kg. Which is shocking to me because i never weighed that much before.. my family and friends tell me i look good but i can tell that im overweight. My face is puffy as fuck and my arms are big, my stomach is big and my thighs are not skinny anymore. Its sad because i deserve to feel amazing. I got my nose done and im honestly fucking beautiful but i need to lose atleast 5 kgs to be deserving of my beauty, cause right now im literally throwing it away and diminishing it to nothing. Instead of being a solid 10/10 im like a 6.5/10 right now and its so ridiculous. But anyways— today i started my day eating a yogurt, then i ate a bowl of this indian food made of veggies and then i was thinking of mcdonalds like non stop. Ive been craving mcdonalds so bad and my mom literally offered it to me… but i ended up NOT having it. I had a salad instead and im so fucking proud of myself for doing that!!! Like ok im not ecstatic right in this moment bc i lowkey feel hopeless abt actually sticking to my diet .. but when i visualize the body im gonna have in the summer if i stick to this, i get so happy. Like damn im on the right track!! Im actually becoming!! Its not tomorrow, its not after tomorrow, its right now!! And thats amazing. Later i got hungry again so i had 4 sushis and 2 clementines. I told myself if i starve im gonna eat smthg rly bad later, and i want to allow myself to eat whenever im hungry— just as long as its either a rly small portion or its smthg healthy. So it was a successful first day back on the plan, and now i need to slowly start implementing other things like working out (i wanna do the 10k steps a day but i dont have a watch or anything yet) and also drinking lots more water. Tumblr helps a lot and im glad i started this blog cause it rly helps to have something visual to look at. Anyways, write tomorrow, bye. 🤍

[tia-saharaaasstuff]

And sometimes

i do get sea sick of feeling the

High and low waves crashing of everyone outside

Maybe i can fix this,

Years of freezing,

they end up fleeting

After they practice their right to tell me who i am

This is not me..

why I need

to be one of the kind

Inner Stand in

the storms we come to realize

Only after our sadness takes off its angry disguise

Watching the peices fly

Musics so loud

Cant handle hearing you sigh

I hate you, I love you.

Bc i know what its like to feel denied

Thats all i knew.

Maybe id be safer if i let my light die,

I cant dissapoint if i dont have a voice that could lie.

But i stayed..quiet..with my inner riots

"Sometimes i just feel like only you understand."

Most of the time

i feel guilty,

for thinking that maybe i can find some peace,

being alone ,

I know most dont see a choice and i seem greedy

But im so tired.

Of worrying about how they damn me if i do

and Damn me if i dont .

So i wont be around waiting for you to decide

Whether you like me today or found a new bone.

They say , "Just when things went right, it doesnt mean they were always wrong."

So i left,

Convinced by a Love so perfect, nothing said

The one i used to proudly refuse,

Unconditonal it stood by

waiting for the moment

when it caught me in embrace after i jumped off this burning bed

Free will, hardest lesson i was taught

Forget it, do what you want

There is always a choice

Where most get caught

Am i wrong for feeling extra safe when the doors got three locks?

What I NEED has been yellimg at ME from

behind each broken dream

Slowly fading frozen in time

I left her behind

All her love,  its all mine.

She was only six,

She was only nine

self hate was a pain

I used to use to get me high

The way you talk to eachother

It didnt come natural,

it was taught

We wonder why we fought

Their battles

Little soldiers

All you wanted was to make beats with your rattles

Raised on Guard

Nows too sensitive

Cover Sold to control

Its fine if you think about what you know

I am free,

not any of the me's you thought

This Love started a Fire and we the melting pots

The Great Flood

Bring us home ,womb waters

Dark nights

Turn to

Watch the warm Sun Rise 

Thankyou Saturn,

This Heart you made strong

This mind you trained over matter. 

One day ill come back

With rivers of hope

Able to Love

Without giving out peices of my

Soul.

You thought were crumbs

portion controlled

I was told, you shouldnt be so much

So i became less condensed

I gave what little i had left

To see you believe again

Id do it all over

Bc now i see the power

In ALL the wallflowers.

Lord i Pray for courage to stay in Love

Practice makes progress

I think id like to laugh more and say less

I laugh in awe of all the connectedness

And when im nervous

I mean excited , same difference

-SCR

1/4/2023

(This night was really beautiful, it started off with being tired, i saw a video that let me express my anger in a healthy way, then i heard another, with a verse that at the core i felt it said, "why not me?" And this was the backgroumd song. Somehow when i write i always snd up making analogies to water, i am a water sign/water placements, and the whole time i wrote this i listened to this song. Relating to the song by thinking about my younger self and my relationships with other people but mostly how i let myself down and how i am being patient with forgiving myself for having fragile boundaries. Letting go of old habits, and old belief habits. Then when i went to screenshot this song bc i like to attach feelings to feelings. Adding background music is a must if i can. Coming to realize the short video on this song was the most perfect. From vizuals to the words. Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou. All love, always 💞

[2ugars]

ੈ♡˳ (bits of) high school senior!mark ft. college freshman!mark

ps - this was actually supposed to b a bonus to the dream as high school students series but i just graduated high school myself, so i thought posting this would b fitting!

congrats to all my fellow class of 2019 grads, we did it, u guys!!! :D

has already graduated and is now a college freshman in a uni in vancouver majoring in english (creative writing)

was last year’s senior class representative

but only because no one else wanted to be class rep and no one volunteered in the first place

not even mark himself volunteered but there he went,

bein class rep,

LMAO

it was a unanimous vote and the position was pretty much shoved into his hands

(ps this actually happened in my school a year ago in two grades!!!!! ninth + twelfth)

grew up in the school

like literally

his mom is a primary music teacher and Has Been a primary school teacher ever since mark was in primary himself

was That kid who had trouble with what to call his mom because she was a teacher but like???

she was still his mom?????

cue existential crisis at four years old

he got mixed up SO MUCJ

during class he’d accidentally call her eomma

and sometimes during dinner he’d call her mrs. lee

Please Help this poor KID

nyways

because mark has been in the school ever since he was a Child, everyone knows him

Like .  EVERYONE everyone

miss moreno from second grade? mark gave her flowers every teacher’s day

mr. pete from eighth? actual LEGEND, mark will never fail to respect that man

mrs. byun from fifth? mark tutored her kids when they were in middle school

has been with the school as it grew in population and in size

he was a student ambassador throughout his four years in high school

meaning when a family or visitors wanted 2 tour the school,

mark was the one to call

because he knows the school so well

“to the right you’ll see the elementary school playground! the flooring is non-slip so you don’t need to worry about your kids falling if they’re outside on wet days!”

[cut to: a bunch of high schoolers Including Mark during the last few minutes of lunch break on a rainy day, pretending to ice-skate and pulling each other on ‘non-slip’ flooring in the playground and very much.    slipping]

he knows teachers

also he’s a really good conversationalist and has mastered the art of small talk

especially with adults

adults love him lol

“MARK LEE TOOK HOW MANY APS?????”

“too many, brenda. too many .”

honestly didn’t have to, considering his major

but he was initially going into stem before switching halfway through sophomore year

a really hardworking boy

couldn’t feel the stress because he was already so stressed so it didn’t make much of a difference

renjun pinched him once while mark was spacing out during a study session and mark didn’t even flinch

it was worrying

mark lee?  

More like .       

mark.        Bee.

get it because the saying busy bee and mark lee and mark bee

i’ll stop

had a bunch of after school activities

so sometimes he would get home by six or seven pm

the latest was eight

always used the school guitar

there was a column on a guitar sign-out sheet where students had to write their name, grade, class, date, and time they took the guitar

and then!

there was a column titled Mark Lee

honestly everyone felt. Very empty when he left

like it was really weird for the younger grades to Not hear a random burst of laughter in the next room

and being like

“yup it’s mark again”

“how much do u wanna bet how lame the joke was?”

“bold of u to assume there was even a joke in the first place for mark lee to laugh like that”

the dreamies miss him and they stay in touch, obviously

they try facetiming him during school so that six of them can be together when they do, but it’s difficult when mark’s on the other side of the world and is also really busy

“are they nice to you there?” “are college students scary?” “i’m surprised they haven’t kicked you out yet, with how annoying you are”

mark ignores the latter statement (made by none other than hyuck) and smiles at the screen. or, at least, the dreamies think he smiles. the connection is pretty bad.

“they’re nice to me,” he responds. “do you guys remember jaehyun? he was there like. three years ago? basketball captain?”

the boys go silent.

“what grade were we in...” jaemin mumbles suddenly.

jeno’s eyes are wide. “were we even alive?”

“i don’t have enough fingers for this.” jisung chimes in.

“you’re all idiots.” renjun sighs.

hyuck quickly attempts to calculate everything in his head. “oh, we were like. sixteen. or fifteen? so just starting high school.”

chenle scrunches his nose. “the american system is super confusing.”

mark stares blankly at them.

“why do you ask, is he beating you up?” “without us!?” “how rude.”

mark doesn’t even remember what he was supposed to tell them, a smile growing on his face as he watches them collectively yell statements and battle cries they were never going to live up to. his heart stings with homesickness, but it’s soothed with endearment as the kids soon scramble to end the call when the school bell rings on the other end.

jaemin: “oh CRAP i have a test! i totally forgot to study!”

jeno: “i have to go, smith is going to kill me if i end up late for class”

renjun: “smith loves you, what are you talking about”

chenle: “hah, suckers, i have study hall~!”

jisung: “shut up, chenle, we all know you do nothing”

chenle: “says the one who watches asmr for an hour and thirty minutes straight!”

jeno: “okay bye, mark, we’ll talk to you soon!”

jaemin & hyuck: “love you!”

hyuck: “tell this jaehyun fella that he can’t beat you up!”

jisung: “not without us!”

renjun: “okay, bye!!!!!! we miss you!!!!!!”

“you’re all impossible,” mark says with a grin. “okay. don’t have too much fun without me!”

the kids all chorus their farewells, but it soon ends up being a competition on who can scream their love for him the loudest. the last thing mark sees before the call finally ends is jisung’s enlarged nostrils with chenle’s manic laughter in the background.

the screen goes black.

call has ended.

he looks at his reflection for a few moments, homesickness coming in full force. he turns his phone off, takes his earphones out, and leans his head back.

jaehyun, who’s across from him, smiles knowingly and sadly. 

“homesick?”

“dude,” mark breathes, throwing his hood over his head and pulling it over his eyes to keep everyone in the library from seeing his reddening, watery eyes, “dude, you don’t even know.”

[loptido]

Draw with me

Albedo x GN!Reader

summary : separated by a glass wall; tired of having to only communicate through writing and drawing, you make desperate attempts to break the barrier that keeps you apart. only for your efforts to end in vain.

warning : angst, the lost of body parts(a whole forearm), blood(not gore) and injuries, gifting said severed limb to their lover. a glass wall that somehow is- idk, magic. i just took the same wall from the animation.. Not entirely read over/checked

setting : different-au(unnamed)

notes : Do watch “Draw with me” by Mike Inel on YT. its so goddamn sad i cant stand it. sgaiwgwu so here this is. Albedo and Reader are around teenage years in this btw (hoohh boy, im scared to post this.. first tumblr post and its angst)

(movin this to my side blog, pokapepii)

// Your an idiot - Part 2

// — Genshin Masterlist

“Writing”

Tap, Tap

A muffled tapping on the glass wall catches your attention, as you walk towards the sound, a small boy — or teenager, he might be around your age — with short, ash-blond hair and bright teal eyes is standing on the other side. The side youve never seen, nor ever will see.

You see him mouth something, was he speaking? If so, did he always talk without his voice? You wonder. The boy seems to start to shout. You wave at him in confusion and start to indicate that you cant hear him.

Luckily he seems to get the memo and starts digging into the pockets of his white jacket. A gloved hand soon exiting a pocket, seemingly clutching a small object. Soon, he starts to write on the wall.

“Hi” Was all he wrote; it was short and simple. But it made you smile. “Can you write?” A small black chalk soon drops from above the wall, you froze but catching it either way.

“nac i esuorc fo” You hurriedly wipe that off with your sleeve, “Of course, duh”. Even if you couldn’t hear him, the sight of him chuckling at your mistake made you huff.

The boy starts to write once more, “What about drawing?” a small doodle of a flower accompanied his question. Choosing to not write, you nod starting to draw a bee for his flower. A giddy smile on your face. It was fun having someone to talk to, even if it was through drawings and writings. And once you’ve got the ball rolling, a small portion of the glass started to flood with endless drawings(his better than yours, you must admit) and short sentences of conversations.

“Albedo”

“?”

“My name, what’s yours?”

“Y/n :)”

You offer him a smile and he returns it.

The next day, it continues again. And again. And again, with your relationship growing and soon, a budding romance began to bloom between you and him. You having wrote down the three words, “i love you”, by accident when you were mindlessly scribbling down random words. To your luck, the feeling was reciprocated.

“Its cold here, yknow” You lazily write down, feeling down for no reason. A doodle of a frown soon drawn.“Then wear some warmer clothes, or bring a blanket.” Albedo wrote bluntly, the same emotionless look on his face. He sees you sigh and pick up the chalk, “I know, i know..” You trail off, literally, a slight line following your falling chalk. “I just, want to be with you” Albedo sees your cheeks tint a slight pink.

“But you are with me” He writes, hoping it would lift your spirits. If it did, he’d be able to see that smile on your face again, the smile he saw many times, the smile that made his heart flutter. “Dont attempt to cross that wall, Albedo.” His mother, and adoptive mother warned him many times. “It’s dangerous and will hurt any living thing”

He had always listened to their words and steered clear of the glass. But after meeting you, he began to stick to the barrier like glue.

Many times since meeting you the thought of crossing over and being in your side crossed his mind. And yet each time he brushed it off, it was too much if a risk. And Albedo was afraid.

Just being able to communicate with you, and hang out with you was enough for him. “There’s just a wall between us” Albedo smiled, “Thats just it, i dont want a wall. I want to be with you” You angrily said, the chalk in your hands nearly snapping from the tight grip. Before pausing, an idea had popped up. A possible solution.

Teal eyes widened in shock, “What are you doing?!” he hurriedly asked upon seeing your actions. You were standing and punching the glass with your dominant hand, not stopping once. In a panic Albedo rose to his feet and began shouting for you to stop, forgetting that you couldn’t hear him at all.

You were determined to break the wall, you were tired of it trapping and encasing you within a transparent prison for years. With a final few punches the glass shattered, and Albedo stepped back with a gasp while you smiled in victory. Your moment of triumph didn’t last long, for soon the shattered glass seemed to somehow turn back in time and went back to normal. Hurting your dominant hand in the process.

You fell back with a scream in pain, clutching your now bleeding arm. All the while Albedo watched in horror, he fell to his knees and began to write, quick. “Are you okay?” The answer was pretty obvious but he couldn’t help but ask. You didn’t reply. And he watched as you stood and ran out if his line of sight, leaving him alone and worried. Dazed.

He didn’t get to see you for the next week after the incident, he waited patiently by your usual meeting spot. Waiting patiently for you to return all patched up and okay.

And when he caught sight of your walking figure coming his way, he couldn’t help the smile that painted his lips. Though it quickly fell when he saw your tired face, your eyes were slightly red. Had you been crying? (He hopes not) Quickly he began to write, “Want to draw :)?” You shook your head no, eyes fixed on the ground and head hung low. You had barely looked at him the whole time. Albedo wouldn’t let that bring him down.

You shakily picked up your chalk, “I cant anymore..” your handwriting became shaky and Albedo had a hard time reading it. “Oh, okay”

Albedo smiled, his adoptive mother — Alice — once said smiles and positive feelings were contagious, in a good way. So he figured if he smiled, you would too. You didn’t.

One day you came to the wall and found a wrapped present waiting for you. Albedo sitting behind it from his side with a smile, he had a new cloak on. The box was on its side, he must have thrown it over. Above were words that read, “For you♡ - Albedo”

As you picked the gift up and looked at him in confusion. Albedo didn’t speak, instead he just smiled more.

Hesitantly you unwrapped the ribbon, a strange feeling in your stomach told you something was off. But you just brushed it aside. Albedo saw the box fall to the ground and his gift fall out. You standing still in shock, eyes widened. “What- are you crazy?!” You scribbled down, a good distance away from the fallen box.

Albedo shuffled over, “Draw with me”

Inside was a severed, pale and bloody forearm. Was that why he wore a cloak all of a sudden?

a/n : watch this become a two parter, or a three part story like the animation- (its good, go check it out.) ..good morning, its the next day and i wrote this last night. it’s probably bad

[teklarn]

𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓬𝓻𝔂 𝓽𝓸𝓸, 𝓲𝓯 𝓲𝓽 𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓷𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝔂𝓸𝓾

character(s): izuku midoriya x gn!reader (x katsuki bakugou) 

a/n: gosh i love angst (quick note!! i edit to the best of my ability, however it’s easy to miss things, and i type 100 words per minute, so im sorry if i miss some things!) this ain’t a poly relationship btw, i don’t feel like i could write that well (no shame to people who do!! personally i feel like i would butcher it) 

reblogs are greatly appreciated! 

based off the song: it’s my party by lesley gore

summary: y/n realizes going to katsuki bakugou’s wedding was a mistake

genre: angst all the way shawties 

warnings: light cursing, heartbreak, alcohol, one-sided pining (reader), aged up/pro-hero au, sad reminiscing bc ahaha bakugou made us sad :’) and a crap load of references to the song, friend zoning (eesh) 

word count: 2,566

ik yall are waiting for a part 2 of brutal and part 3 of you’re not my boyfriend but this idea just struck i had to get it down pls 

- - - 

“let’s raise a toast to our finest lovebirds, my best friend and his wife, katsuki bakugou and ochaco uraraka!” kirishima took a sip of champagne. 

you lifted your beverage in unison with the others seated at your table but did not drink. you blinked down at the fizzing beverage. 

“we wish you all the best,” kirishima said. “you and your best buds have no doubt you two’ll be known as some of the most indestructible symbols of peace.” 

another wave of applause passed among the crowd. the last toast was finished and the music resumed. your entire table left you sitting. it wasn’t like you knew anyone here, anyways. nobody except for the few classmates bakugou was still in touch with. 

those people consisted of izuku midoriya, who was sitting at the table across from you, as well as across the dance floor. 

the lights twinkled up again, red, blue, and green flashing along the floor. 

you couldn’t deny it. bakugou in a red suit, uraraka in a wedding dress fell just above her knees, a red bow tied around her waist. you did not doubt that if you were to be sold as a healthy person on the black market, that dress would still be worth more than you. 

the only comfort you had was midoriya, who had greeted you when you came in, but the two of you had exchanged no further words. but he looked equally as miserable as you. 

uraraka and bakugou were perfect together. they looked happy. and you were happy to see bakugou happy. happy to see uraraka happy with him. 

bakugou dipped his newlywed wife to the beat of the music. her back arched perfectly into his large hands. 

what hurts the most was that, while you wished it was you instead of her on that dance floor, you knew it wouldn’t work out. 

not that you and bakugou wouldn’t have worked out. the two of you were a perfect couple! 

what hurts the most was that it was a wish, and in every near universe, you still didn’t have that ring. 

uravity and dynamight simply looked...happier. 

- 

you stormed out, shaking. why was your katsuki kissing her? holding her when it should have been you? 

deep down, you knew you had no right. you and bakugou were barely a couple. throughout his years at yuuei, he’d calmed down immensely. so much that he could strike up a conversation with nearly everyone. as it turns out, introverted katsuki bakugou was a shameless flirt. 

the two of you exchanged flitting glances from time to time, but it was never anything serious. at least to him, it wasn’t. 

you knew he’d never taken the flirting seriously, and you also knew about his aching feelings for uraraka. how he covered his mouth whenever she walked by. how his voice raised just a bit, and how soft his eyes got. 

you shouldn’t have been surprised. he never even hinted that he might have had romantic feelings for you. 

the entire room erupted with applause as he kissed her. the katsuki bakugou, kissing someone? pfft, only in dreams. 

for some, the dream would be good. like uraraka, who had shamelessly kissed him back. 

for you, it was a complete nightmare. 

the blaring music, the lights, the balloons, the ‘happy graduation class of 1-A!’ 

you drowned it all out. you curled your knees to your chest. you had no right to be hurt. not at all. they were his emotions. you had no control over them. 

loneliness clouded over you. your chest screamed with longing. a longing to be held. be wanted by him. 

you were alone. nobody was coming to comfort you. nobody was- 

the door opened, clicking shut just as quickly. someone sniffled. 

your eyes flicked up from your knees. 

“y/n? i...i’m sorry, i had no idea anyone was out here...i can leave...”

“it’s alright, izuku.” 

- 

izuku took a swig from a bottle containing something much heavier than champagne. 

that same tug in your chest came about. you were tired of seeing the billboards, the magazines. tired of seeing the unquestionably perfect relationship, perfect love bloom right before you. 

dynamight and uravity this! dynamight and uravity that! 

the music was loud enough, the lights were busy enough, and the people were ignorant enough to neglect your crying figure. 

this was supposed to be my party. he loved me first. 

- 

“you okay?” you asked, swiping your nose. 

izuku looked back at the graduation party. “no, y/n. i’m not.” 

“then we’re both absolute shit.” you let him help you up. “why’re you crying?” 

“just...just uraraka.” 

“for me it’s just bakugou.” 

just as bakugou had calmed down during his years at yuuei, izuku had earned a sense of sarcasm. “are they just oblivious or stupid?” 

“goodness, izuku,” you joked, pressing a hand to your shuddering chest. “calling uraraka stupid?” 

he gave you a sad side-smile. you listened in silence as the upbeat music played on. 

“i guess we’re the stupid ones.” he sighed, chest heaving a little. 

“i guess,” you agreed. he pulled you into a hug, and you let the tears flow. your sobs corrupted your chest as you curled into his arms. “why? why did it have to be her?” 

“not all heroes end up happy, y/n.” 

you looked up at him, eyes puffy, sniffling. “why can’t we be part of that small portion of heroes who are?” 

izuku looked up, trying to neglect the water pooling in his own eyes. “i guess...well, not to be a narcissist—” he let out a breathy chuckle, “―but if you noticed, all the greatest heroes die with some kind of regret.” 

“maybe i don’t want to be a good hero.” you ignored his efforts to lighten the mood. 

“heroes don’t always get to choose whether they’ll be good or not. some things just happen.”

“i’m sorry, izuku.” you swiped at your eyes. “you’re hurt just as badly as me. i don’t want to make it—” 

“hey.” izuku gently pried your hands away from your face, fingers ghosting over your wrists. his emerald eyes gleamed as they stared into yours. “don’t invalidate your feelings just because of me. we’re both hurting, but that doesn’t mean i won’t listen to you.” 

your sobs came back again, and you fell into his chest. 

- 

bakugou spun uraraka, laughing gently as she twirled in his arms. his eyes lit up whenever he saw her. they twinkled. he sparkled. his smile was dazzling. and he was everything you never had. 

you were a heartbroken mess, even after all these years. there was a list of all the reasons you were mad at him, and yourself. 

your sobs were almost uncontrollable, and at this point, you were shocked nobody came to check on you. not that you cared very much. even if you were making a small effort to hide your face, it still would have been nice to feel a touch on your shoulder, someone perhaps shaking you gently to make sure you were awake. 

not that you’d tell them what was wrong. you just wanted to know somebody cared, and to have the option to talk to somebody if you needed to do so. 

but here you were. cheesy, upbeat fifties music echoed along the walls of the room. bakugou had secretly adored artists from back then, and you’d often catch him dancing and singing along to long-forgotten oldies. 

if you weren’t his best friend, you would have blown off coming here and binge-watched ‘my best friend’s wedding’ and sobbed. 

your head was down, forehead leaning on the backs of your forearms stacked upon each other. tears were streaming down, your shoulders shuddering with each weak breath sucked in and released. 

until bakugou chose you, you had no reason to smile. at least not now. by no means were you desperate. love sometimes did that to people. made them look needy, look unwanted. 

you’ve had plenty of options in the past, but the one person who you wanted didn’t want you back. didn’t even care. 

since the graduation party, uraraka and you had been a bit tense. a part of her felt like she knew how you felt, and how bakugou mattered to you more than anyone in the world. 

after the first year, she began abandoning izuku and ignoring his emotions towards her. after she and bakugou found each other, they had already known they would settle with one another. 

you and izuku had never been close, but you were both good friends and were there when you needed one another. 

he had walked you through your pain of senior year, and you’d helped him reach a lot of his goals, too. but bakugou just didn’t seem to care anymore. not even about becoming the number one hero. he looked at uraraka like she was his goal, his new dream, the reason he was happy. he looked at her and saw that he had the world in his hands and wanted to keep it that way. 

you? you were pluto. exiled from the rest of the planets. exiled from the rest of his options, when you used to be his first. 

- 

“y/n?”

you and izuku backed away from each other. you’d both been crying for quite a bit. how long it had been, you were both unsure. 

uraraka now stood at the door. you peeked into the window, leaning back a bit and catching glances of the blonde, who was currently being clapped on the back by his friends, congratulated for ‘getting the girl’. 

“are you guys okay?’ uraraka asked. 

“would you cry, uraraka?” 

she tilted her head. “what?” 

you pushed yourself off of izuku. “do you think you’d cry if you saw me kissing him, too?” 

“what’re you―” 

“you would cry, too! you would be sobbing!” you stabbed an accusatory finger at her. “you were my friend! you knew how i felt, and you’re kissing him?” 

uraraka’s eyes widened. “i...i’m sorry. it all just happened, and i—”

“shut the hell up, uraraka. you ruined this party. for me and izuku.” 

perhaps you went a bit far, but in your heart and your mind, you knew she deserved it. she knew. uraraka had known. 

izuku gave uraraka a sympathetic look before pressing a hand to your back and leading you away. 

- 

it still came as a bit of a shock that uraraka had let bakugou invite you to their wedding. gosh. little, domestic bakugou, sealing invitations and batting his eyes at his oh-so-sweet wife so he could invite his best friend. 

little domestic uraraka sweetly kissing her fiance on the cheek and pouting as she said, “how can i say no?” 

it was disgusting, and everything you wanted to have with him. 

you allowed yourself to be selfish this one time. after all, you deserved it. you’d endured hours of bakugou blabbering on about how sweet uraraka was. everything you weren’t. 

you took the bottle to champagne. your ankles were aching as you stumbled out of the room. your vision blurred, becoming foggy with tears. not one person stopped you. you guessed because nobody noticed. 

like graduation night, you slumped down right outside the doors to the party, the music, lights, and laughter muffled. the only difference was that you had a bottle of champagne and the man of your dreams was gone. for good, this time. 

-

“i wish she noticed me. it was like, after first year, the uraraka i knew just vanished.” 

you nodded. you and midoriya were wandering the streets, cool air brushing down your neck and on your face as cars passed. 

“uraraka was so sweet, but she lost feelings so fast and...ugh.” midoriya ran a hand through his hair, ruffling his curls. “i’m still a bit...baffled. i know people change, but she and kacchan both switched up so fast.” 

“i don’t want to say they’re jackasses, but they’re kind of jackasses.” 

izuku rubbed your shoulder as you leaned on him while the two of you walked. “don’t say that.” 

“sorry,” you breathed. 

“no more being sorry. being sorry all the time leads to shit like this.” 

you chuckled. “yeah, it does.” you sniffed. “did i take you away from the party? you can go back if you want.” 

he shrugged. “’s all right. i don’t mind.” 

“do you want to be here or would you rather be in there?”

“out here with you. i can’t be there right now.” 

“me too.” 

- 

“let me guess.” 

you looked up and scoffed softly. 

“this was supposed to be your party?” 

you nodded. “my party, my groom. i’m not supposed to be crying at my party, am i?” 

your friend shook his head. “not at all. cheer up, y/n.” 

izuku slid down the wall, sitting beside you. he rested his arms on his knees, twisting open his own bottle of champagne. “you look like a mess.”

“and you look like you need anger management.” you smiled. 

he grinned back. “do i now?” 

“yeah, you do. you should have seen yourself sitting there. all alone, the one person drinking something that wasn’t the fifty-thousand yen drinks.” 

“54,795.75 yen, to be exact.” 

you raised an eyebrow. “you’re insane. you kidding me? why do you know that?” 

“i was the weird kid who took notes on everyone in the class. of course i would know this. i’m offended you think i wouldn’t.” 

you tilted your head back in laughter. “gosh, izuku.” 

“mhm.” 

there was a pause. comfortable silence filled the space, broken by you sigh after gulping down your drink. “so they’re gone?” 

“i’d rather not dwell on it.” 

“how old are we now?” 

izuku gave a breathy chuckle. “twenty-five.” 

you smiled. “really, now? and i thought i would be married by now.” 

“me too. ‘s a shame.” 

“how about, if we’re both still not married by the time we’re forty, we get married to each other, adopt three children and we become hot parents.” 

“three?” 

“yeah, we can have a mini hero agency.” 

“that’s horrifying. but i agree. having a mini hero agency would be pretty amazing.” 

“i’m glad you agree with me, izuku.” you brushed a curl from his eyes. 

“can’t wait until i’m forty,” he smirked. 

“me neither.” 

“maybe by then we would have forgotten all of this?” 

“we’ll be fighting a villain, and we get our memories erased, and then we fall in love because we wake up beside each other in the hospital. we’re both equally confused.” you peppered him with jokes. “it’s a journey we will go on together.” 

“can’t wait until my memory gets erased.” 

“do you wanna get out of here?”

izuku shook his head. “it’s their wedding. we can’t. we shouldn’t.” 

you gave him a silly look. 

“you’re always such trouble, y/n.” 

“if you hate it, then wipe that stupid grin off your face.” 

izuku’s features softened. “maybe i like it. but only sometimes.” he took your head and lead you out, leaving his drink behind while you took yours. 

a single tear rolled down your cheek. he didn’t erase all your pain, nor your feelings for bakugou. it wasn’t what you needed, no. 

you just needed a friend. a real one. one that wouldn’t steal your dream from you. and that’s what you knew you had right now. 

besides, things could happen in the future, right? 

you smiled, and let the cold air touch your skin. 

[melancholyshadow]

sunday’s with a solider || b. barnes

part one 

summary: after a good date with bucky, (y/n) figures out who she’s really getting involved with. 

pairing: bucky barnes x female!librarian!reader 

warnings: kissing (??), swearing

an: im honestly speechless, the first part of this series has 150+ notes! i’m so happy you guys liked it! i’m debating on make this a three or a four-part series, please let me know what you think, but there will definitely be at least another part. one of the next, or the next, will include some spice, if you know what i mean. and who do y’all want me to write about next? im thinking mr. steve rogers. 

tags: @biixlv​

“Please tell me you’re a booth person and not a table person.” You chuckled, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Uh, yeah.” He laughed and rolled his eyes at you. He began walking towards one of the booths. You followed happily behind him, scooting into the opposite side of the booth. He pulled off his hat and both his gloves, setting them on the seat next to him. You propped your head on the palm of your hands, stopping yourself from looking at his metal hand, you weren’t even sure if it was metal.

The diner was one that had been in this town for, at least, forty years, and it definitely showed its age. It was trying to be a ‘retro diner’ in the eighties, so that aged it another thirty years. You grew up coming here with your family, the food was good, and you thought the inside was cute. The building was longer than it was wide, and the floor reminded you of a checkerboard. There was a long bar on the left, space for waiters to maneuver, and a long panel of metal enclosing the kitchen portion. Bright red bar stools were implemented into the floor, screwed into the floor, every two feet or so. On the right, were five or six booths, the same shade of red as the bar stools, big enough for about four people max. 

“Hey, sugar!” A familiar voice chirped to your left. Your eyes met a familiar pair of green ones, and a smile immediately filled your face. “Hey, Mabel!” You cooed, half-standing under the table and wrapping your arms around her small, fragile frame. She smelled like coffee and smoke, as she always did. The two of you pulled away, and her eyes instantly went to Bucky. “Who's your friend?” She asked, raising her eyebrows at you. “Mabel, this is my friend James. James, this is Mabel.” You explained, quickly introducing the two. He smiled at her and stuck out his ‘normal’ hand to give her a handshake, which she was very fond of. 

“Well, it is great to meet you, James! What can I get you to drink?” She had abandoned her notepad well before you were born, her ability to just remember someone’s order still amazed you. “Coffee please, no sugar or creamer please.” She smiled at him, and turned back towards me, “Regular for you, dear?” She asked, and you smiled, scrunching up your eyes and nose. She practically pranced away with a huge smile on her face. Bucky chuckled, pulling you from your thoughts, turning your head back towards him. His eyes were scanning over the faded laminated menu.

“How do you know Mabel?” He asked, looking up and unzipping his jacket, pulling it off his abdomen and onto the seat beside him, with his gloves and hat. “I grew up coming here with my family, she’s known me since I was in my mother’s stomach.” You explained, pointing to a picture above the bar. It was pretty faded after sitting in direct sunlight for over two decades, but it was a picture of Mabel, your mom, your dad, and you, you all had on party hats. “I had my first ten birthdays at this diner.” Bucky squinted his eyes and smiled once he made out the picture of baby you. 

“That’s awesome.” He said looking back at you. He opened his mouth to say something else, but Mabel cut him off. “Here is that coffee, Mr. James.” She slid the coffee in front of him, “And a regular for you, (Y/M/N).” She wiped her hands on her apron, “What can I get you two to eat?” Bucky looked at me, wanting me to order first. “We’ll both take the ‘67.” You smiled. She copied, “You got it, dearie.” And she walked away. Bucky cleared his throat, “Just trust me, Bucky,” You chuckled, placing your hands on top of his, “You’re gonna love it.” He paused for a moment, “I’ll hold you to that.” He winked at you. Did he just wink at you? Was he flirting? You immediately shot back at a wink and a flirty response, “Deal.”

The two of you ate and chatted for about an hour and a half. “Okay, you were right, that was the best food I’ve ever had.” He said, stacking your plates and utensils together, making it easier for Mabel when she took them off the table. “Can I get you two anything else?” She asked, picking up the two plates with ease. Bucky looked at you and you nodded a ‘no,’ and he looked back at Mabel, “No thank you, ma’am, but I will take the check.” He smiled. 

“No, Mabel, split the check pl-” But Mabel cut you off, “Sorry, dear, my hearing aid died, I can’t quite hear you. I’ll bring that check right to you, Mr. James.” Quickly walking away. “Bucky, no, I will pay for mine.” You insisted, going to reach for your purse. You looked around you in your seat in a panic, and then you remembered, it was in the saddlebag attached to his bike. He laughed at you as you came to that realization. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?” You sighed, taking a sip of your drink. He simply shrugged and smiled, pulling his wallet out of his back pocket. 

Once Mabel returned with the bill and Bucky’s card, the two of you stood, and he let you walk out first. It was a lot colder now, goosebumps layered your exposed arms, like a reflex you wrapped your arms around yourself. “Here, you take this.” He insisted, placing his heavy leather jacket on your shoulders. “No, I can't, you're gonna get cold too.” You began to shrug it off, but he placed his hands on your shoulders, stopping you. “I’ll be fine.” He smirked at you, his hands lingering for a little longer than normal. 

“Ready?” He asked as he straddled his bike, once more. You stuck your arms through the long sleeves, which went way past your fingertips. You took your seat behind him, and he handed you the helmet, and you slid it over your head. Similar to earlier, you snaked your arms around him, clasping your hands together, and resting around his mid-abdomen. His hands, once again, landed on your thighs, pulling you even closer to him, making a different type of goosebumps cover your arms. 

“Hang on tight, doll.” He said as the bike came to life. You were so glad you were wearing a helmet, so he couldn’t see the brush creep onto your cheeks. As you two rode, he used his prosthetic hand to steer the bike and kept his flesh hand on your knee the entire time. The sky had ditched the orange, pink, and red hues and was now littered in stars and moonlight. You didn’t want this to end, you felt like you could stay there for hours, but the library came into view a lot sooner than you wanted it to. 

The next day came and you got excited, as always, to see Bucky. Today was a little different though, after your date last night. Wait, was that even a date? It had to be, right? I mean he paid and flirted with you. 

“Bucky, why do you come in here every day?” You asked, peering at him over the book in your hands. He didn’t move for a second, you assumed he was finishing the sentence he was reading. “Well, all the libraries in New York City are crowded and noisy.” He explained, “So when I found this place while scoping out new libraries, even though it is quite a distance, I knew this place was it for me.” He smiled at you. “At least that was the reason initially.” He muttered, picking his book back up. 

“And what is that supposed to mean?” You set your book down this time, squinting your eyes at him, and propping your head up on your hands. “Well obviously, I now come back because the shitty coffee you offer is to die for.” He said sarcastically. You gasped and threw one of your pens at him, bouncing off his chest and onto the floor. He broke out into a fit of laughter, and you soon followed. 

“No, but now I come back to hang out with you.” He admitted to you, avoiding your stare. “Oh that so sweet…” You started, “...Dork.” Throwing another pen at him, this time hitting the bill of his hat. Bucky had come in every day for a little over a month now and missed not a single Sunday. “Hey (Y/F/N)?” Bucky asked, looking back up from his book. Your eyes didn’t leave the pages of your book, but you answered, “Yes, Buck?” You asked back, flipping the page. 

“I won’t be here tomorrow, and for a couple days after that.” When the words left his lips, a wave of sadness washed over you. Your lips twisted into a pout, looking towards him. “Why?” You asked, dragging out the word. “I have some obligations.” You rolled your eyes at him, “Okay, Mr. Mysterious.” You scoffed, feeling a bit upset. How long had he known? Why was he just now telling you? “I’m gonna be so bored without you.” You whined, leaning back in your chair with a huff. 

“I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” 

It was closing time now, and as usual, Bucky walked you to your car. “You better bring me a souvenir from wherever you’re going.” You joked, tossing your purse into the passenger seat, and turning back towards Bucky. “Would you prefer a T-shirt? Maybe some socks? How about a shot glass?” He joked back, leaning against the side of your car. “Surprise me.” You laughed, pushing his chest. 

As you went to pull away from his chest, his flesh hand wrapped around your wrist, softly. He placed it back on his chest, and his metal hand went to your hip, pulling you closer to him. The only distance between both of your chest was being occupied by your hand. You swore up and down that he could hear your heartbeat, but you were soon reassured because you could feel his heartbeat racing just as much as yours was. Bucky glanced down at your lips, and you did the same. 

You closed the space between your lips, and without thinking your eyes fluttered closed, taking in everything happening over your entire body. His lips were soft, tasting like coffee and mint. The growing stubble on his chin rubbed against the softness of your cheeks. His flesh hand was warm around your wrist, gripping it softly, he never wanted to hurt you. But the gestures with his metal hand were very different. It was leaving a cool tingling sensation against the small patch of exposed skin, and his grip was tighter, pushing you impossibly closer to him. You took your free hand, and placed it on his face, thumb running over his cheek, and your other four fingers resting on his neck. 

After what feels like minutes, but was probably only about thirty seconds, you pulled away from him. Reluctantly, of course. The two of you just stood there, not moving, relishing at the moment for as long as you could. “You know I meant to surprise me souvenir-wise, right?” You chuckled, messing with the hair on the nape of his neck. “Oh okay, we can just never do that again.” He sighed, messing with you. 

“No, no, we can definitely do that again.”

~

It was the first Sunday without Bucky in a while, he had been gone for almost a week now, you assumed working on his ‘obligations.’ You had been keeping yourself busy with a new book series, one that Bucky actually recommended to you. But today would be full of dusting, reorganizing, putting away some newer books, and vacuuming. It was probably around 3:30 in the afternoon, and you were dusting the large bay windows by the front of the store. 

You could feel the music moving through your body, making it impossible for you not to dance, at least just a little wiggle. You swayed your hips, the music taking over, singing into the duster like a microphone. Your free hand ran up the side of your body, from your thigh all the way up to your face. You threw your arm up over your head, and prancing around the tables, shifting the duster from a microphone to an electric guitar. When the song was finally over, and you were very much out of breath, you made your way back to the window. And when you did so, your heart dropped to your toes. There was a man standing on the opposite side of the window, watching you. 

It only took a few seconds for your fear to turn into relief. It was Bucky. You dashed to the left towards the door, unlocking the door, and running out to greet him. Practically leaping towards him, you wrapped both arms around his neck, and his arms snaked around your waist. After a few moments of swaying and just taking in his presence, you pulled away. He was smiling widely, “I didn’t mean to end your concert so soon, I was enjoying it.” Adding a chuckle. Your face blushed, and you put your hand over your eyes, peeking at him through your middle and ring finger, “Did you see the whole thing?” You asked, dreading his answer. “The whole thing.”

The two of you walked back inside, the music still playing loudly. There was a slow song playing, and you grabbed your phone to turn it down, but Bucky stopped you. “Wanna dance?” He asked, putting his hand out for you to grab. You smiled, happily taking it. He pulled your chest against his. Your arms rest on his shoulders, your fingers loosely interlocked. Both hands on your hips, both of you just rocking side to side. The music wasn’t even registering in your brain, you were just focusing on this moment with him. 

“I remember when this song came out.” He said softly. You cocked your eyebrow at him, “Didn’t this song come out in the fifties?” You asked confused, what did he mean by that? “So you really don’t know who I am, huh?” The question caught you off-guard, it sounded very egotistical. “No..?” You asked more like a question. And that’s when he explained everything, making a very long story very short. He explained the arm, the serum, and the ‘obligations.’ 

“You’re a fucking Avenger?” You asked, head in your hands, elbows on your knee. “Well, technically I’ve never been asked to be one, but kind of.” His hand on your back, rubbing it in small circles. “So you’re the James Buchanan Barnes from the Captain America museum?” He nodded. Everything kind of flooded back to your memory, you knew you heard the nickname “Bucky” before, and you knew he looked somewhat familiar, but you assumed he just looked kinda similar to an actor or something. 

It was silent for a good five minutes, but Bucky broke it. “Hey, guess what?” He asked, trying to hide the upturn of his lips. What now? Was he gonna break some more news to you? Was he also part alien? “Hmm?” That was all you said, running your fingers through your hair. He moved his hand to reach into his backpack and pulled out a book, sliding it towards you. 

“Russian Urban Legends.” You read the title, quickly flipping through the book with your thumb. “Flip to page 48, and tell me what it says.” He said, propping his head upon his hands. You did as he said and landed on page forty-eight. “The Winter Soldier.” You read the words written in a bright red font, the page decorated in grainy photos and ridiculously cheesy government lettering and drawings. Bucky looked at you, prompting you to continue. 

“A ghost story or a real threat?”

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 5]

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, use of toys(sybian), squirting, the long awaited chapter 5 😳💕 do they finally meet?!?!?!?! hehehehehehe also sorry for not being able to post this yesterday, had a busy week and when I tell ya I woke up at 3pm today 😗 💕💕💕💕 as always, thank you so much for your continued interest!! I'm already writing ch 6 and im SOOOO EXCITEDDDD hHEHEHEHEEHEH 💕💕💕💕💕 HAVE A GREAT REST OF YOUR WEEKENDS! 🍒 

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - ? 

“You guys! I--you have to see this!”

You can’t wipe the smile off of your face when you shimmy to the side, excitedly showing off the new gift that Seungcheol had sent in the mail.

sleepy_wonu: holy hell

universe_WZ: that mustve costed hella

alphagyu97: nothin like feelin extra poor amirite lads

angelhan: it was only a matter of time before dom.cheol was untouchable lol 

You giggle slightly as you adjust the camera so that you and your new sybian are in frame. “Hey~ Don’t say that!! Y’know it’s not the amount of money you spend on me… I’m glad you guys are always here with me~” The sound of coins clinking goes off in the back as you read a few more comments.

dom.cheol: well princess, don’t u wanna show them how you use your new toy? ;)

tangerine_kwan: fuck i bet it can get u to cum so fuckin fast

hoshi_tiger_xx: yessss

dom.cheol has donated $100

hoshi_tiger_xx has donated $50

“Hmm~ How many times do you think I can cum with this? Oh! Why don’t we do this~” You pause, sliding your wet panties down your legs before tossing the material to the side. You grin, swinging a leg over the toy until you’re straddling it. “Rapid fire question! Whoever guesses the right amount of orgasms I can take before I call quits… Wins a special unreleased photoset of me! Go!”

dom.cheol: 5

universe_WZ: 4

sleepy_wonu: 6

angelhan: 3 artist8hao: 5

alphagyu97: everyone took all the good numbers already!!! 7!!!!!

gentleman_josh95: DMAN IT 3

tangerine_kwan: 8, fuck

kitty_junjun: ugh i was gonna say 4!!!!

xcaliburDK: i was gonna say 5!!!!

therealchan99: 2? thats so low tho….

chwenon: as if anyone is gonna say 1, lmao. Uh 6…. If sleepy_wonu happens to disappear

hoshi_tiger_xx: im gonna say 10, but… seems… risky

Reaching for the remote, you situate yourself until the raised part of the toy sits directly on your clit. A shiver runs up your spine at the feeling; already excited for what’s in store. “Um, to be fair I haven’t tried it myself yet so I’m not sure either... Hehe, but I guess we’ll find out together, huh?”

Gulping, you set the sybian to its lowest setting, the air getting knocked out of your lungs immediately as your body lurches forward. “H--holy shit!” The vibrations are already harsh on the lowest setting; your fingers gripping the remote tightly as you try to adjust to the feeling. “O--oh my g-god, I--”

dom.cheol: aww can ur cute lil clit take it?

xcaliburDK: maybe one of the lower numbers was right lol…

The moans spill freely from your lips, garbled noises getting lost in the mix when you start to grind against the vibration. “Fuck, it--it feels suh--so good, hah, already feel like ‘m gonna cum…” You whine, already getting lost in the pleasure. For a second, you’re tempted to raise the vibration intensity but you hold back, letting your wetness coat the toy as you continue to grind down onto it. The sound of donations and comments sound fuzzy to your ears; only the sound of the sybian buzzing reminding you that the camera was still even on.

“Ngh, g-god, I’m--I’m gonna cum!”

tangerine_kwan has donated $75

xcaliburDK has donated $50

dom.cheol has donated $200

dom.cheol: cmon, lets see that pretty pussy cum

Your legs shake as you cum, only a squeak coming out of your mouth as you lurch forward atop the toy. The grip you have on the remote loosens while simultaneously trying to turn it off in the midst of your orgasm.

dom.cheol: awww cumming so hard on the first setting? Cute

therealchan99: lol baby is in trouble now

angelhan: maybe 3 was right lmao

“I--a-ah, fu--fuck!” You cry, shaky fingers finally managing to shut the toy off. Your body immediately untenses; chest heaving with how sensitive you already were and it had only been your first orgasm and the lowest setting of the toy. “O-oh my g-god, I--I didn’t know i-it was that s-strong…” You mumble, body buzzing with the remnants of your orgasm.

sleepy_wonu: well mr dom.cheol did pay top dollar

gentleman_josh95: imagine if u had this for yesterdays show lol

“Oh god, if--if I had this for yesterday’s show, I would’ve been too boneless to do today’s show!” You laugh airily, slowly grinding against the toy already. “It feels really nice though… I’m already super curious about how strong the other settings are…” Trailing off, you reach for the remote again, throat dry as you fiddle with the knob.

kitty_junjun: what if u set it to the max setting

chwenon: idk if her cute lil body could take it

dom.cheol: its okay baby, take ur time. I wanna see how sensitive that pussy of yours can get

“But ‘m already so sensitive~ I dunno how much more I can take~” You tease, biting your lip when all the comments flooding the chat are words of encouragement.

You knew when you started camming that it’d be no easy job. Building up your fanbase and subscriber count had taken you months upon months to even get within the thousands and camming was physically exhausting. Some days your viewer counts were low and some days they were above average and sometimes you didn’t make as much in one show than another.

tangerine_kwan: was therealchan99 right with 2 then? Heh

therealchan99: finally FINALLY ITS MY TIME TO SHINE

Giggling, you slowly start turning the knob; body twitching when the vibrations kick in at full force.

Seungcheol watches in amazement at the way your body jerks atop the machine.

He can see the way your legs twitch unbearably when you cum for the third time; your brows furrowed at the intensity of the vibrations and your taut body when you can barely manage to turn the machine off.

Licking his lips, he slowly thrusts up into his closed palm, spreading the precum down his shaft as he watches you catch your breath.

“I--ngh, fuh--fuck, I---I don’t--don’t know if I--I can cum a-again…”

Seungcheol moans at your breathy whimpers; the arousal in his body pooling up quickly when he sees the fucked out expression in your eyes. His eyes flit to the wetness that coats the silicone portion of the toy, smirking when he realizes how much you really seemed to enjoy the gift he’d gotten you.

Mentally patting himself on the back, he praises himself for making the right decision.

angelhan: please tlel me im the winner im begging

universe_WZ: NO

dom.cheol: is the princess tired already? ;)

You catch your breath, not wanting to give up despite how fuzzy your head was getting and how much your body was buzzing. “I dunno… We still haven’t tried the last setting, you guys… And I’m just so curious...” You whisper, hazy eyes staring into the camera.

hoshi_tiger_xx: god u look so pretty like this, all fucked out

artis8hao: right? fuck, id kill to be that guy who can get u off like this

xcaliburDK: goddamn same

The sound of coins clinking mixes with the ringing in your ears; fingertips already on the knob of the remote.

You take a deep breath, letting the adrenaline kick in as you quickly set the knob to the highest setting, a high pitched cry spilling from your lips when you let go of the remote in favor of holding onto the machine instead. Grinding down onto it, you meet the toy's harsh vibrations as it quickly forces another orgasm out of you in the matter of seconds.

Choked cries spill from your lips as your entire body tenses up; body twitching uncontrollably as you cum for the fourth time. You lean back with whatever energy you have left, bracing yourself on the back of the toy as you relieve your swollen clit of the buzzing machine. Your orgasm refuses to stop and you can already tell how obscenely wet everything’s gotten when your head starts to clear.

alphagyu97: fuck you squirted all over the toy baby

universe_WZ: fuck fucki fuck

universe_WZ: wait did i winf kjfhdsjk

You shakily slide off of the machine, resting on your side as the machine still buzzes with life next to you. Your entire body won’t stop shaking, head muddled as you fight the urge to shut your eyes and sleep for the next 5 days. “I’m--I--” You whimper, still feeling the phantom vibrations between your legs.

“I--ho--holy fuck, I, w-wow, I--I don’t--that--I’m, I’m just… wow.”

dom.cheol has donated $400

dom.cheol: knew you’d like it ;)

universe_WZ: THAT MEANS I WON

universe_WZ has donated $150

angelhan has donated $150

therealchan99: well, at least some of us got close

hoshi_tiger_xx: fuckin speak for urself man i said /10/

You end the show after letting ‘universe_WZ’ know you’ll contact him soon, shutting your eyes as you lay on your soiled sheets.

You can still feel your fingertips twitching when your eyes slide shut, chest heaving in deep breaths as you try to relax yourself, momentarily cursing yourself for pushing your body too far for tonight’s show. 

Groaning, you reach for your phone, the screen lighting up with a text from Seungcheol, a simple ‘don’t forget to drink water ;)’ in your notifications and you can’t help but pout.

Seungcheol was nice, almost too nice. Definitely not in a murderer kinda way though, you think. 

He bought you expensive gifts and never asked for anything in return which made you feel bad sometimes. And while the donations and tips you’d made through your camshows was enough to get by with, Seungcheol’s generous donations helped you always make your rent and bills on time without worrying if you’d have enough or not.

You quickly text him back with a smile on your face; hoping that he’ll like what you had to offer.

Seungcheol feels the exact same way he did when you first contacted him offering him a free show, except maybe ten times worse. At first, he’d been a little sad that he hadn’t won your quick little game but this made up for it 20-fold.

The six simple words read ‘want to meet up next friday?’, a small heart emoji next to the question and he’d almost thrown his phone when he read it, hands shakily responding with a simple ‘I’d love to.’ to make it seem like he was calm when he was most definitely not.

His immediate next order of business after replying was to text Namjoon despite how late into the night it already was, begging for the day off and offering to take any shifts or pay cuts in exchange for it. 

All he needed was one day and he swore he’d never miss a day of work ever again.

Namjoon responds with a quick ‘sure, why not’, momentarily confusing him as to why his boss was awake while simultaneously sending Seungcheol into complete panic when he realizes he finally gets to meet you.

The week goes by extremely quickly to Seungcheol; his mood on a completely different level when he offers to pick up Yoongi’s Sunday shift without a complaint. He cleans up all the messes around the roller rink and even offers to do jobs that aren’t his which have Jeongguk raising a brow at the older male.

In the days that lead up to your meeting, Seungcheol looks up a few cafes that you might be interested in and even goes to get an STD exam, not that he’s expecting anything. Safety first, he says.

Your Wednesday show comes and goes, Seungcheol too excited to even get off when he watches you and he even donates an extra $600 at the end of the show; travel spending money, he offers.

And Thursday comes without a hitch and he all but skips to the employee backroom once his shift is over, humming a tune while he changes out of his uniform.

“Hey hyung, no offense, but are you okay?” Jeongguk rests against the locker next to Seungcheol’s open one, brow raised at the blue haired male that beams back at him. “I’m scared, why are you so… giddy. You even offered to take Yoongi-hyung’s weekend shift? What the hell was that about? I’ve never seen him that giddy either. ��Man, this place is getting weird, maybe I should quit...”

Seungcheol can’t help but laugh, patting Jeongguk on the shoulder before shutting his locker.

“I have an important meeting tomorrow, that’s all. And don’t quit, ‘cause who else is gonna give me free food.”

While the excitement had him since Saturday, now that it was finally Friday, he was downright nervous.

The two of you had agreed to meet at 2PM in front of the cafe that Seungcheol had picked out and you’d gotten a hotel in town to make it easier on yourself instead of trying to get back to your place too late. Seungcheol had offered to come pick you up, but you had politely declined; instead opting to meet him first before letting him do anything else for you.

And by nature, Seungcheol gets to the cafe 15 minutes early, fidgeting and continuously running his fingers through his hair as he patiently waits. He can feel his palms getting sweaty when he rubs them against his jeans, mentally trying to keep calm and his head floods with all sorts of thoughts; mainly, how he even got into this position with you in the first place. And he gets so distracted that he doesn’t realize you’d be standing watching him zone out for the last 5 minutes.

“Wow, not sure what’s got you so focused but you’re standing so still!”

Seungcheol hears your cute airy laugh that follows, a cherry blush on his cheeks when his eyes meet your smiling face. “I--oh my god…” He whispers, taking in your appearance.

He feels his face buzzing, fingers twitching when he sees you in a cute simple  sundress. “W-wow, you--you’re just… so beautiful. I mean, you’re beautiful on cam too but just, wow, in person? Incredible.” The blush reaches his ears when he realizes he’s rambling, a nervous laugh spilling out of his lips.

“S--sorry, I, uh, usually I’m more chill than this but y’know…” He trails off, to which you nod. You step closer to Seungcheol and he gets a hint of your sweet smelling perfume, mentally groaning when your cute eyes peer up into his.

“That’s okay! I totally understand~ I’m kinda nervous myself too, to be honest…” You pause, a pink blush coating your own cheeks. “But let’s talk over some food, huh?”

Seungcheol doesn’t want to pry, but he’s not sure if he should address you as ‘Cherry’ in person, or if he should avoid calling you by anything at all.

He watches as you go through the cafe’s menu, biting the inside of his cheek as he itches to ask.

“‘Cheol�� I can feel you staring, y’know.. Penny for your thoughts?” You ask, concerned eyes meeting his nervous ones.

“I just-- Sorry, I didn’t mean to be awkward, I just was wondering how I should address you in person? I don’t want to overstep my bounds, I know you don’t put your real name out there so…”

You place your menu down, closing it before leaning on your palms atop the small table. Seungcheol is cute, too cute, you think. You knew this would be a question when the two of you eventually met and you had given yourself the time to get used to the idea that he’d know your real name.

He eyes hyperfocus on your glossy lips, watching as you say your name for him for the first time.

Seungcheol’s heart threatens to beat out of his chest when he hears it; repeating it over and over in his head before he says it out loud.

“Wow, it sounds nice when it’s you saying it~” You tease, leaning back in your chair. “I don’t mind if you call me by my name, by the way! The pet names are cute but maybe we should keep that to the bedroom~” You end in a whisper, winking at the male.

Fuck, he thinks, just as his cock throbs at your comment. He really wishes you wouldn’t say things like that because he’s weak and he knows it, especially when it comes to you. “Okay, cool! Yeah, sorry, I just---I didn’t want to overstep, I know you don’t really let that be public information.”

“Of course! And thank you, I really can’t tell you how much you’ve done for me. I really… really wouldn’t be able to do all the things that I do if it weren’t for your constant support.”

You want to say more, but the waiter comes to take your orders, cutting you off until he leaves again.

“By the way…” Seungcheol looks at you with curious eyes, lips puckered around his drink straw. “Tell me about yourself, ‘Cheollie! I feel like we didn’t really get to talk that one time!”

He swallows the water in his mouth, licking his dry lips. Here goes nothing, he thinks.

“I swear, and please don’t think I’m a loser, but I--I work at a roller rink. It’s really not cool, I’m not some high paid CEO or whatever, I--I just, I work hard?” Seungcheol chuckles, running a hand through his hair as he waits for your reply.

“Wait, that’s so cool! Oh my gosh, I kinda wanna go!”

The surprise washes over Seungcheol, eyes wide as saucers when he hears you saying you’d want to visit his workplace. “Wuh---wait, seriously!?”

“Yeah! It’s kinda, like, retro! I haven’t been to one since I was a kid!” He quickly offers to bring you to the roller rink on Sunday so you could have somewhere to hang out while you were in town.

“And sadly, I took a shift on Sunday so you can hang with me while I work.” 

Seungcheol grins, watching as you jokingly roll your eyes at him. “So you did it on purpose, huh…” The two of you share a laugh, glad that your first meeting seemed to be going okay so far.

“Well, I mean, if it makes you feel any better, my best friend works the concession stand so I’ll make sure to get you a free pair of skates and food whenever you want?”

“It’s a deal!”

The two of you continue to talk over your late lunch, Seungcheol telling you of the various work hijinks he’d gone through at his time working at the roller rink.

“Which, by the way, that morning show you did… Hope you know I holed up in the restroom for an entire hour for that ‘lil stunt.”

You can’t help the tears that fall from your eyes when you laugh, only feeling slightly bad for the blue haired male. “But I told you! Sometimes it’s just like that, y’know~” You tease back, heart blooming at the way you and Seungcheol got along.

In all honesty, there’d been something on your mind since you first sat down and you didn’t know when the right time to ask was, or if it was even appropriate.

The smile slips from your face as you bite the inside of your cheek in thought.

Seungcheol takes the bill from the waiter, slipping his card into the holder before you can even offer. But he notices the way your expression falls, noting the hesitance in your eyes when he looks at you from across the table.

“Are you okay? What’s wrong?” His voice is gentle, soft and caring when he leans over the table to make sure you’re alright.

“Yeah! Just---Can I ask you for a favor?”

[kattwritesuwu]

Can I request a Clingy!monsterTom x Depressed!Reader? Maybe with cutting and suicidal thoughts?

I sure can!!! I LOVE angst!!!!!

---------------------

Fandom: Eddsworld

Character: Tom

Reader: Depressed

Fic type: Comfort/angst

Warnings: TRIGGER WARNING: This WILL heavily mention suic/de, blood, and perhaps other triggering topics, read at your own risk!!

Notes: People, I'm not trying to make depression and similar illness romantic, this is simply for comfort.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hate everything.

Well, not everything, but the majority, y'know? Everything just...sucks. Life in general, it's all terrible.

People are terrible. Sure, I've found a few choice people that aren't the bane of my existence, but even they have their flaws.

Am I saying that I'm some heaven sent angel? Hell no I'm not. I'm just as terrible if not more! I hate everyone, including myself.

Am I lying? Yeah. Do I have a crush on someone? Yeah. Am I gonna do something about it? Nope.

Why should I? It's not like I'll be here longer anyways...

I'm planning to kill myself.

Am I scared? Kind of. But at this point I don't care. I'm always scared anyways. Always on my guard around people.

Most people don't know the fear and pain of constantly feeling...numb.

It's not like I never feel anything, it's just so rare. My most common emotion is pain. I just want to curl up in a ball and die. But all I can ever being myself to do is cry, and even that's a rare occurrence at this point.

I feel so alone.

Friends? Yeah I have a few.... they're all a bit odd in their own way. Can't complain though, they're like family to me.

My real family? Not many immediate ones, plus, I moved to England five years ago. They called me everyday for the first couple of months. Nowadays, I can barely get a text back... I get that they have their own lives in their respective country, but man, it just makes me so cold-feeling...

I guess where I was going with this, is that I'm scared. Not of my inevitable death, but everything else.

I'm scared of anything and everything now that I think about it. I don't exactly mean common fears they talk about in elementary school, I'm talking real world problems.

I'm scared of failure, not sure why. I've failed enough in my life....it shouldn't even faze me at this point.

Im especially scared of people.

My friends? Yeah them too. What if I make a fool of myself and they think I'm an idiot? What if I make the wrong move, and they hate me? They probably hate me enough as it is...

That why I won't confess to Tom. He'll hate me afterwards. There's just no point in ruining something for nothing in return.

These were the thoughts that ran through my head as my arms and legs were sliced up by a blade driven by my own hands. It's wasn't like it hurt. All it really did was sting, I'm just that used to being hurt, I suppose.

As I was wrapping up my little 'session' I heard a knock on my door,

"(Y/N)! You in there? It's dinner time! I made breakfast for dinner!" A British accent leaked through my door.

I didn't scramble around at the thought of him walking in, my door was locked after all. It's not like I'm that stupid.

" I'll be there in a few minutes, Edd." I spoke back in a raspy voice, not bothering to yell. Edd has good ears, he can somehow hear a whisper from across the house.

It takes me a minute or two to get up and walk into the bathroom that connects to my room. I stumble a bit with the loss of blood.

Once I get in there I take a quick shower, just barely long enough to stop the bleeding and make it appear as if you just took an actual shower.

Once I get out of the shower, I slip on my (favorite color) hoodie.

That was an easy part of hiding my self abuse. Everyone in the house wore a hoodie of their own designated color.

I also slipped on a longer article of clothing to go onto my legs. Couldn't let them see my thighs either.

Once I finished the rest of my cleaning up, I headed out of my little bathroom, and in front of my door. I took a deep breath, put on a smile, and walked out.

I got about halfway down the stairs before a screech startled me, causing me to trip a bit,

" (Y/N) IS HERE! YAY!" The high pitch British scream could only belong to the narcissistic ginger known as Matt.

Once I got my balance back into my feet, I continued down the stairs and greeted Matt with a wave.

" Yeah she lives here, idiot. She's not going anywhere." A deeper voice had spoken, I turned around and Tom was there as expected. I smile shrunk a bit at his last comment.

" Sup (y/n)." You snapped out of your thoughts and responded with a casual 'yo.'

The three of us then heard a thick accent cursing in the kitchen, no doubt it was Tord,

" For jævla skyld! Just let me have the last piece!!"

Sure enough, when we walked into the kitchen, Edd and Tord were fighting over the last piece of bacon. I let out a sigh, and the two boys finally acknowledged our existence. That alone didn't stop their argument though.

I didn't even bother attempting to break up the fight, I never could anyways. Their little fuss always ends one of two ways. Edd steals the bacon from under Tord's nose, or vise versa.

I just grabbed a small portion of food, and sat down.

I knew I would be gone by the end of tonight...but I wanted to taste Edd's cooking one last time.

Something interesting happened, instead of one of the two boys getting the bacon, they halved it and sat down. Of all my four years living in this house with these people, they've never shared their bacon.

Strange.

Dinner wasn't as talkative as it usually was when we all ate at the table. Usually we'd all have a big group discussion about our day, or week. Tonight was quiet, giving me an opportunity,

" Hey, guys?" Each one of their heads turned to me, and Edd signalled me to continue,

" I just wanted to say, thank you." Their brows furrowed but I held out a hand to tell them to let me finish,

" You four have helped me with so much over the past few years. From when you let me live here when I couldn't find proper housing situations, to letting me borrow the car. I just wanted to formally tell you all how grateful I really am. You are truly the kindest people I've ever met." As I went on talking, I realized how bad of an idea this actually was.

I mean, will they get suspicious? I'm just showing gratitude right? It shouldn't sound like a cry for help or anything...

As I snapped out of thought for the fiftieth time today, I notice that all of the boys have some type of smile on their face, even Tom!

Edd was smiling like a proud mother,

Matt was smiling giddily,

Tord had a smug, 'cool guy' smile,

And Tom had the smallest smile that made my heart melt.

I awkwardly continued my fake smile, and sat down.

Conversation continued on as would on a normal night, with the topic being past pleasant memories.

I volunteered to wash the dishes, it was the least I could do. There was only one problem. For some ungodly reason, Tom had insisted on helping me.

I couldn't figure out why at first, untill it dawned on me that he probably needed something from me.

So as I scrubbed the forgetten food off of the ceramic plate, he rinsed and dried them. We did this in silence, aside from the running water. Tom's the first one to break the tension filled silence,

" So, how have you been?" It was such a simple question, I could have simply faked a toothy grin, and said that I was great. I could have thanked him for asking. I could have asked him back.

But I only did one of those things.

" I've been doing just as good as I always do." I reply with a small sad smile. I tear my eyes away from the dish water," How about you? You've been awfully quiet tonight."

He chuckles lowly," Just had a lot on my mind, trying to face some of my problems, that's all." I stop what I'm doing and look over at him,

" Do you want to talk about it? I think the others are asleep already."

Normally when Tom is having any type of problem, he comes to me for advice, or even just for someone to listen to him rant when he's drunk. I even gave him a spare key to my room if he ever needs me while I'm asleep. He's offered the same for me, but I told him that I have a counselor. I try not to lie to my housemates all the time, only when necessary.

He simply shakes his head in response," Nah, this is one I have to deal with on my own," I sigh,

" Alright then, but keep my offer in mind. Just try to remember to see me before I go to bed, I'm...going to bed early tonight. I have something to do tommorow." He nods in understanding.

After we finish the dishes, we say our goodnights,

" I'll see you in the morning, (y/n)." I give one last fake smile,

" Same to you, Tom. Sleep well." I see him nod and walk down the hall as I close my door and lock it for the final time.

I walk into my bathroom and look into the mirror. All I see is a monstrosity of a person glaring back at me.

The bags under my eyes had only gotten worse after the sleepless nights I spent writing my suicide note.

I decided to skip reading over it one last time, I want nothing that could alter my decision at hand here. If I read my dying love letter that's written to Tom, I might stop myself in some kind of silly hope that everything could be okay again. It was too late for all that now.

So, I grabbed my blade that had served me well over the years, and stepped into the bathtub. I didn't cry, I didn't shake in fear of what I was about to do. I sadly smiled instead. As I took my hoodie off, revealing a tank top that no one knew I owned. I set my hoodie softly onto the floor, and turned on the hot water.

I took a deep breath in, and sigh, grabbing my blade and getting to work on my first artery. It took me a couple tries to find it.

But once I did, it started the red tint in the once clear bath water. I took in a shaky breath, adjusting to the dizziness of loosing so much blood so quickly.

At this point I couldn't even hear the bathwater running, everything was muffled.

I reached to turn it off, and a hand was placed onto mine. It takes me a good second to register that there was someone next to the tub, yelling my name right next to my face.

I try my best to focus on who could have caught me. Yet it's so difficult to take in my surroundings at this point.

So as I stare at the person beside my bathtub with fading eyes. I feel pressure on my wound, and see something being wrapped around it.

I start panicking, trying to say no, to let me die.

But I just can't. I just watch as my life is saved against my will.

Suddenly I can see that I'm moving, I can't figure out how until I notice the arms carrying me bridal style to a soft surface. That's when I lost consciousness for the next hour.

I didn't exactly 'wake up' more like fazed into existence. It's like I just gradually became aware of what was around me.

I became aware of the sobs coming from my bedside, and of the pressure squeezing my hand.

I forced my eyes open and tried to sit up. Yet I instantly regretted my decision, pain shot throughout my body. I glance over to my hand and up the....purple arm....

Who is this? Or perhaps I should say, what is this?

It's some kind of...monster? Hybrid? It looked kind of human... I could only see the torso and up. Even then, the arms grew bigger the farther down the arms stretched, and turned a deeper and deeper shade of purple. Horns poked out of the head laying slightly onto my shin, poking me a bit.

" Am-" I hold my throat. That hurt. I clear my throat of the mucus and start again as the unknown monster wakes up,

" Am I dead?"

The monsters head shoots up, and I can't help but recognize the 'eyes' that I've grown to love.

" T-Tom..."

He tries to smile for me, but it twists into a sad frown as his black orbs start to water,

" (Y/n)....(y/n) you're...y-you're okay! You're okay..." He said this over and over again as he cupped my cheeks with his transformed hands.

I grab onto his forearm to steady his shaking. This was starting to scare me.

I had never seen this man shed a tear in front of me, yet alone bawl into my shoulder like he was doing now,

" Tom, it's okay, I'm right here." I whispered this, and many other reassurances into his ear. Confirming to him that it was going to be okay and that, to my displeasure, I wasn't going anywhere.

He seemed to get angry after a few minutes, he ripped himself away from me and took hold of my shoulders,

" WHAT IF YOU WEREN'T RIGHT HERE? WHAT IF I HADN'T OF WALKED IN!! WHAT THEN HUH? YOU WOULDN'T BE RIGHT HERE!!! YOU'D BE GONE!! I would have...lost you..." He slid down the side of my bed as he finished his outburst. He sat crying into his knees.

I didn't know what to do. Is he mad at me? But despite the questions, I acted without thinking.

I began to run my fingers through his hair, almost brushing it. He seemed surprised at first, before he leaned into my touch.

" I'm sorry Tom. I didn't think it would effect you like this..." All was silent for a few moments. Until,

" Why..?" He sniffled a few times before I could respond.

" Why? Why what?" He looked up to me,

" Why would you try to leave me?" I couldn't even bring myself to say anything after that. Tom seemed to sense the frog in my throat, and continued,

" You don't realize, (y/n). You don't realize how special you are. To your family, your friends. I mean bloody hell (y/n)! What about us?! Edd would be heartbroken! And how are we supposed to explain something like that to Matt?" I avoided the possible eye contact and twidled my thumbs in my lap,

" What about me (y/n)? How am I supposed to go on living with myself if you, the love of my life, killed herself?" My mind went blank. He took my hand in between both of his,

" I know this isn't the greatest time for this, but if it'll boost your self esteem even a little bit, I don't care about embarrassing myself. (Y/n) (L/n), I am deeply in love with you, and have been since you moved in. I've loved you since you helped me to bed when I came in drunk all those years ago. I've loved you since you beat my Pac-Man score at the arcade, I acted so mad, but you were just so cute so excited like that... (Y/n)... Please let me help you love yourself by loving you..."

By the time he was done with his speech, I was in tears, a small frown on my face. He seemed to get the wrong idea as he instantly dropped my hand and got up,

" I got the message, I'll just uhm... I'll just g-" I grabbed his hoodie strings and pulled him in for a kiss.

We could both tell that there would be many more to come.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm sorry if it's extremely long, I just love to write angst haha...

[kissme-hs]

Tainted love: 3

Here it is!! I’m so sorry it took me so long to update it but let me know what you think! Hope you enjoy it.

~Ria

Pairing: Fem! Reader x Chris Evans

Warnings: None.

*_*_*_*_*_*

Hatred is far from the feeling you felt. You were disgusted. Utterly disgusted with the man you put your trust and faith and your heart into who did nothing but took it for granted and it all into little crumbs of pain. All this time you blamed yourself for HIS actions that he not only did while being in his complete sense but knowing how wrong it is-continued doing it. The image you had of Chris in your mind now vanished, the man you once thought deserved to be prayed now made your stomach churn because of how shameful he turned out to be.

After sending him the text you thought, oh you thought that he would realize what he lost, that he would feel a little bit at least of regret in the back of his head but you were so wrong. It not only made you feel worthless but made you realize instead how your love meant nothing to him, how all those years you spent in each other’s arm vowing to each other to be in love until the end of time was nothing but a lie to him. Where to you it meant your entire life.

One doesn’t stay with a person for three years not to just fuck and say I love you’s for fun. With the years the feelings grow strong and at some point, you start fantasizing marrying that person, having kids with the person, grow old with the person. But when one decides to go and cheat, putting all the years of love in ignorance and throwing it all in the pit of darkness not only everything changes but the dreams once knitted by the eyes of the one who remained faithful in love, who was the true lover gets struck by the lightening of reality. And once the dreams crashes, it becomes nearly impossible to dream again because the dreamer starts seeing the real world.

Fuck dreams.

Became your to go motto ever since you knocked on his door.

The heavy teal door opened after a few knocks as you held your breath getting yourself ready to face the man who ripped your heart apart. But instead you were met by a pair of green eyes, gorgeous eyes. She stood there in his hoodie and a pair of short showing her perfect toned legs. Her dirty blonde hair and fuller plumps would made any man lose his girl and go crawling to her. She was an absolute piece of art.

“Chris we have someone here for you” She yelled leaning back a bit so the man could hear her. She gave you a side smile as a gesture of kindness. She was aware she was a homewrecker, she knew how much Chris loved you and she also knew being a good friend she should’ve stopped him when things became a routine between them two but she couldn’t say no to him. Chris would make any women go crawling to him too. She was equally shameful for what she has done not as close to how Chris was feeling but still. So when Chris asked her to come over explaining her what happen which she knew would some day she didn’t hesitate coming over comforting him.

“i-im Samantha” she replied stepping aside letting you step inside of your his house. The smell of familiar cologne and candles hit your nostrils making you tear up from the past good memories. Gi ving her a tiniest sad smile and a nod, you stepped inside of the house. Turning your gaze up to the sound of approaching footsteps you saw the man, and oh sweet jesus you thought you’d hate him but how could you when the feeling of love was always greater than hatred. But the pain crept up when you saw Samantha walking to him and rubbing his side comforting him, though she was guilty, she still at some point enjoyed the attention Chris gave her.

Though she might have a portion of kindness in her heart she was known for breaking homes. She was used to getting in pants of men who were committed. It made her feel special; it made her feel like gold that everyone loved chasing. Especially in this case, knowing what a prize Chris’s girlfriend, you were she was over the moon. She loved how Chris was willing to give up a beautiful woman with a proper job and who had her life sorted for someone who was nothing compared to you.

“Y/n” he breathed out ignoring the woman rubbing his arm. His eyes getting wet seeing your face after days. Jeez only if he could kiss you and tell you how much he missed you and loved you.

“I-im sorry, I’m so sorry” He said walking to you as you raised your hand telling him to stop, which he understood nodding his head and taking a step back. He felt the ache in his heart.

“He really is sorry, he told me everything after you texted him so I came running” Samantha uttered rubbing Chris’s back. It did nothing to you but made your blood boil as you closed your eyes and took a deep breath not wanting to say something which could hurt her feelings. Opening your mouth telling her to leave you heard Chris say that instead.

“Can I ask you to leave please?” He asked her taking a deep breath trying not to yell either.

“I-“

“Get out, get off my property” you spat. You and Chris jointly brought this house so you wouldn’t feel a burden on him being the independent woman you were. Feeling like she was shamed in front of two successful people, Samantha gathered her stuff and left within the next coming minute. Though you were a softie, there was no doubt you has a powerful side too.

“I’m sorry baby, I am so sorry. Please give me a second chance.”

“Why Chris? Why did you cheat on me? Was my love was not enough for you to sleeping with her. Tell me Chris did you not feel a little bit of shame fucking on OUR bed? Tell me why did you have to go and do that making me look like a fool? Why did you waste my time? WHY DID YOU FAKED THE LOVE if you wanted to cheat?” You finally let it out. You were crying at this not giving a fuck. He deserved to see how broken he left you. You were not going to act like everything was fine, like you didn’t care when you felt dead inside.

“No. No baby. Never for once I ever faked my love for you.” He cried cupping your cheeks-you finally let him touch you because you wanted to feel his warmth on your cold skin. His own eyes crying as you sobbed yourself.

“I-I don’t know why I did that. I don’t know why I decided to chase a rock when I had the most precious diamond. She is nothing compared to you. Nothing. I love you so much” He whispered resting his forehead against yours. You knew deep down he meant what he said. You felt the words hitting your body making your knees go week but it was for the best. The separation. So pushing him back slightly you gathered your broken pieces up.

“I just came to tell you that I am moving to California. I will always cherish the good memories you gave me” you gave him a broken smile wiping your tears with the back of your hand.

“No please give me one more chance” Chris pleaded grabbing your hands. His defeated eyes begged yours to give in, to see that he wasn’t lying anymore. That he was truly sorry for what he has done but being the strong headed woman you are, you shook your head and wiped his tears with your hand before cupping his cheek.

“It’s for the best. I still love you, but it’s not the same Chris. Let me let you go”

That was an year ago. An year ago you left the man standing on his porch as you turned your back on his forever, making your way to the new life that waited ahead of you in Los Angeles. The city of angels. The city that gave you a chance to put your words into songs, let your shattered voice sing it in a melody helping you reach out to him without reaching out to him.

And today you stood in front of over 100 amazing successful celebrities who warmly welcomed you in the family of Hollywood and decided to join you for your album launch party. You didn’t hesitate writing down your deepest condolences you had for yourself and singing it out. Every word people heard in the songs came from the bottom of your heart. Came within the true feeling of getting lost and found again.

Getting into the industry wasn’t hard for you. You were already a known person working for Hollywood and it not only being the reason how you met Chris it also gave you an opportunity  to let your talent out. All those months you spent working hard to get acceptance by one of the music producers was the time when Chris was fucking Samantha. Only if he stayed the night you begged him to, he would’ve known it all.

Your album was dedicated to Chris. No one knew expect you. No one could know anyways.

Stepping down the mini platform where you expressed you gratitude to the audience you made your way to where the bar was set up to drink in the emotions that were bubbling up your throat from all the love you received to the pain that still ached in every nerve in your body. It was impossible to erase the memory of him fucking Samantha from your head. You were proud to you say you tried. Tried every way of escaping his face haunting your dreams every night. The feelings choking you down. The pain eating you alive. But you couldn’t.

“What you said there was beautiful.” You heard the deep voice of the man who you left standing on the door of Boston an year ago. Turning your body around, mentally preparing yourself for the wave of mixed emotions to hit you like a truck you faced his adorningly beautiful face. His beard looked fuller and his hair fluffier. He looked the same but his eyes looked dead, just like they were when you left.

“Thank you.” You gave him a broken smile.

“Can we talk? Please?” He asked you with eyes full of hope and you nodded letting him guide you out to the balcony that had the perfect view of the city. He deserved some time with you after an year of you completely blocking him out. He deserved to know that the words coming out of your mouth in the song were written about him.

“It about you, you know. The album” You said walking over to the railing looking at the illuminous city.

“I figured, I never knew you were working on something so big.” He stood beside you.

“You would have if you stayed”

“Listen, I’m not going to waste any more time. Im here to beg you back in life, I am sorry for what I have done but please give me a chance. That one year spent without you was my living hell. Everyday I prayed for you to come back but you never did and there’s no question why. I am a horrible man but I promise if you let me prove it that I am so much better than I was I wont let you down. I will love you even more than I ever have” he said with a soft voice guilt dripping with every word he spoke making you turn around to face him. His eyes glistening with tears and his hands holding each other in front of his chest.

Man was literally begging you.

“Hey you are not a horrible man.” You whispered walking to him as you put his hands down and held his one cheek in your hand. He instantly nuzzled his nose feeling your skin after days of being away from you. His knees were giving away and so was his heart.

“We all make mistakes but learning from them and moving on is important. I forgave you the minute I stepped away from our relationship. You’re nothing but still the most precious man I ever had” you said. Your own eyes picking the tears.

“then give me a chance” he spoke kissing your palm staring down In your eyes making your belly turn in knots.

“I cant. I have moved on Chris” You said breaking his heart. He breathed out biting his lower lip as he looked on. He never felt so defeated and helpless. But this is what he deserved for throwing away the best he ever had. For not respecting the beautiful relationship and woman he was meant to guard. He opened his mouth but the lump in his throat got in the way. He could just break down.

“Then let me be your friend. I just want to be in your life. Make up for what I’ve missed. Please don’t say no.” He trembled in fear you would reject him but instead you nod your head and pull him in a hug knowing he would break if you didn’t. Still knowing him like the back of your head you gave in his request hoping you could contain the emotions.

It is said, two who once fell in love can never be friends. Once in love, always in love.

So you stood there holding him, closed your eyes letting the man calm his cries. Falling back in the chakra of tainted love.

-

Tags

@captainchrisstan

@evansphnx12

@adriannajackson

[heywardsarchive]

Lie to me

Summary: Draco pushed away his love and watched her move on as his heart broke more and more.

Warnings: angst , fem reader

word count: 2.9k + 

Listen to lie to me by 5 seconds of summer to feel the story more. Memories are in italics

thanks to the amazing @pregnant-piggy​ for proofreading this!

this is for @iliveiloveiwrite​‘s writing challenge! im sorry it took so long prompt is in bold.

**** Draco regretted that day more than anything in his life. He pushed away the only light in his dark life. He remembered the day as if it was yesterday although it happened more than 6 months ago.

"Draco! Stop." Y/n told him as he walked away from her. He ignored her and continued walking. He had a mission to fullfil. Nothing could stop him. Lost in his thoughts, he didn't hear y/n run toward him. "Draco Lucius Malfoy you listen to me right now." "What y/n! I have places to be." "Yeah. Of course you do. Never have time for me. YOUR GIRLFRIEND!" "You are not the only person in my life y/n." Draco said rubbing the bridge of his nose.  "Alright then. I'm not going to be in your life anymore." She told him, eyes watering slightly. "We're done." She turned around, her hair slapping Draco in the face.

6 months ago Draco was still a dumb fifth year. Now as a sixteen year old who had been given a deadly task, he was drowning in his own head even more. He walked into the great hall and sat down on his seat at the Slytherin table. His eyes unconsciously drifted to the gryffindor table where y/n sat with him. Him being Dean Thomas. They started dating about a month ago and she looked happy. Happier then she was with him.

Draco sat at his table poking at his food, not really eating. His eyes couldn't help but keep flitting back to her. He watched as y/n rested her head on Dean's shoulder and giggled at something he said. She never smiled that big when she was with him. She did infact. In the beginning of their relationship was quite sweet. When Draco asked her out her face lit up and her smile was so bright, it could rival the sun.

"Hey y/n!" Draco came up behind y/n while they both left their shared transfiguration class. "Hi Draco, what's up?" He looked a bit flustered and rubbed the back of his neck. "I uh had to ask you something." "Ask away." She smiled at him and Draco swore he almost got blown away by the beauty of the girl in front of him. "Will you uh go out with me?" She were slightly shocked to see the Draco Malfoy nervous. But at the same time y/n was delighted! She had been crushing on him for a few months after all. "Yes ofcourse I will!"

Draco almost did a happy dance on the spot. (He actually did) Y/n laughed at him and leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek, but Draco turned his head and she accidentally kissed his lips. She pulled away immediately looked completely red and flustered. "Sorry that didn't mean to happen, I'm so sorry i-" Draco cut her off with another kiss. A proper one this time. She ran her fingers through his hair as his cupped her cheeks. "See you in hogsmeade." She smiled and left. Draco was never happier in his life.

Today Draco decided to stay back, not going to hogsmeade in order to try and find a way to complete the task given to him, for if he failed he would suffer. Very badly. He sat in the courtyard watching happy couples and students walk toward the carriages. He held in his hand a paper with everything he had thought of. They weren't very good plans. Draco didn't want to actually kill Dumbledore, but he had to pretend to do so.

Y/n walked past him clinging on to Dean's arm, Seamus walking beside them. Draco had never hated anyone more than he hated Dean Thomas at that very moment. He wanted nothing more than to strangle him and pull y/n into his arms and kiss her again. But he knew he couldn't. She didn't love him anymore. He wished she did. He wanted to ask her. He wanted to hear the words leave her lips, even if it was a lie.

He stood up quickly, dropping his things in the process. She looked toward him looking for the source of the noise. Their eyes met for a split second before she looked away. He had never wanted to see such hurt and malice in her eyes, especially when looking at him. But he did what he did and nothing could change it now.

Draco decided to walk to the astronomy tower where it would be silent. He sat down looking out of the window. His first date with y/n was here in the tower...

"Draco! Where we going?" Y/n asked him, giggling slightly. "Shh love, you'll get to know soon enough." He held on to her hand tighter and brought her to the astronomy tower. He had set up an elaborate dinner on a picnic mat with the help of the house elves. "Wow, Draco I, this is amazing!" She turned around and kissed him passionately. "Anything for you lovely." She giggled.

They sat down on the mat and enjoyed each other's presence. "You remembered my favourite food!" She said, holding draco's cheek. "Ofcourse I did." He kissed her palm and they continued eating the excellent meal. After they were done, they lay on the mat and looked at the stars. " Thankyou Draco. The date was amazing. But next time, let me spoil you instead." He smiled. "Oh darling, that won't be possible when you're with me." She simply tightened her grip on his hand.

Draco shook his head, pushing away the memory. It hurt too much. He had to get out of the tower. Everything reminded him of her. He ran out of the door, tears slowly falling down his cheek. He didn't know where he was going, he just went where his feet took him. He ended up on the seventh floor. There wasn't much there. He saw a door and opened it. The room was large, filled with chairs and tables. In the centre there was a cupboard. The vanishing cabinet. He finally had a good plan but he didn't know if he wanted to execute it.

He sat in the room for a while pondering his choices and decisions. He shed a few tears and as he sat, his gaze on the cupboard, he wondered if he could ever get over y/n. He could never hate her, no. It was not her fault and he still loved her. Love, it's a strong word. He remembered the first time they said it to each other and felt his heart break a tiny bit.

It was the last hogsmeade weekend before break and Draco and y/n walked hand in hand in the snow. Christmas was coming soon and they were yet to buy gifts. "Alright dray, you go your way and I'll go mine, we'll meet near the three broomsticks after one hour alright?" "Ok." He pulled y/n against him and kissed her cold lips. "Bye." She giggled pushing him away.

That evening, the two of them sat togetherness and wrapped all of their gifts. Draco's looked very neat and had no creases. "How is yours so neat?" Y/n said, her eyes wide. "Mother made sure I had the skill of wrapping gifts and unwrapping them with class since I was about 6." She nodded and looked at her own gifts. They weren't that bad, they were just a bit messy at the edges. "It's ok love, what matters is the sentiment." He smiled lovingly at the girl in front of him.

The next morning, they were leaving for the home. At the breakfast table, y/n had brought down draco's gift for him. "I wanted to see your reaction when you opened it." He felt so loved by the small gesture. He opened the wrapping paper and in it was a small ring, shaped like a snake. "I charmed it so that you could come to know if I was happy or sad or whatever. And with my ring I can come to know about you." She smiled triumphantly showing Draco her ring that was shaped like a flower vine. "It will turn pink for in love, red for angry, blue for sad, yellow for happy and you get the picture." Draco's heart swelled with happiness. He knew she was the one for him, or atleast he thought at that point of time. "I love you." He blurted out. Y/n's face turned red and Draco thought he messed up. "I'm so sorry, you don't need to say it back. I-" she cut him off and kissed him. "I love you too silly." Draco sighed in relief and kissed her once again. "Come on let's go now, or we'll miss the train." The ring glew pink.

Draco remembered that old memory that occured around a year or more ago. He pulled out the ring from the chain around his neck. It was silver, there was no glow coming from it, mostly because there was no connection to it anymore. He put the ring away, wiped his tears and walked away.

*****

Draco spent most of his time in sixth year locked in myrtles bathroom. He had finally fixed the vanishing cabinet. He didn't know if he was happy or sad about it. Today was the day the death eaters would break into Hogwarts and watch him kill Dumbledore. He wanted to warn y/n to stay away from the astronomy tower, but he'd have to confess in that case. He knew she didn't love him anymore, why was he afraid of disappointing her? He knew she fell out of love way before they broke up.

They were constantly fighting and blowing each other off a few months before y/n broke things off with him. "Not now y/n." It was mostly Draco. She did try mend things but there are things that cannot be fixed. Their relationship was one of them. Draco watched her fall out if love with him, though he didn't pay much attention to it. He was far too caught up in his own head. Yes, he loved her, but that wasn't enough. His ring rarely glew pink they way it used to. He knew their breakup was inevitable but nothing could have prepared him for it.

He stood with his wand in his trembling hand. He disarmed Dumbledore, but could not bring it in him to kill the old headmaster. He closed his eyes and pictured her face. She would hate him even more if he went through with his task. He started lowering his wand when Snape walked in front of him killing Dumbledore instead. Everything that happened after was a blur. He was being dragged by the arm with Snape as they left Hogwarts grounds. He was apparated home where the dark lord.

He spent a large portion of the year alone in his room. The rest of the house was far too gloomy for him. He had no company and no privacy. He fiddled with the trinkets lying around his room, not paying attention to the screams from below. They were a regular occurrence and Draco had learned to tune them out.

That was until one day, he heard a familiar sound. He knew he had heard that voice before. It was screaming obscene words and cries. He ran out of his room and looked at the living room below. There in the mercy of his wretched aunt Bellatrix, lay the only girl he had truly ever loved. He wanted to call out her name, but that would only bring her more pain.

So he waited. They threw her in the dungeon after a few hours of torture. Draco wanted to go see her but he was probably the last person she wanted to see. It was a few days later when he was given the task of bringing meals to the prisoners that he faced her after nearly two years. He silently went about his task. He placed the plate in front of her. He wanted to say sometimes, anything but no sound came.

He was about to get up and leave when she stopped him. "Draco, wait." He looked at y/n and took in her appears. Her face was scarred and thin. She looked pale and weak. But she was anything but in his eyes. "You don't look too happy." She said. "I'm not. But there's nothing anyone can do to help me." He croaked out. They sat in silence for a few minutes. "I feel like you want to tell me something." She said suddenly. "Why?Why did you leave ?" He said. "Oh Draco." Y/n shook her head. "Didn't you see we were bad for each other? I loved you and so I let you go. I didn't know what was going on in your head because you didn't let me in. I thought we lost that spark, which indeed we had. I know it hurt at first but look, here we are now. Sitting in a dungeon. Draco, I loved you. But that's in the past now. We have to hope for new beginnings and a better life. Maybe one day, if I survive this, I'll start my own bakery." She sighed wistfully. Draco took it as his cue to leave. "Take care.' he said patting her hand.

About a month later, Harry Potter was caught and brought to Malfoy manor. He and Ron and Hermione managed to break out the prisoners and escape to a safe place. Draco only hoped that y/n were safe and alive.

The next time Draco saw y/n was at the battle of Hogwarts. She was fighting a death Eater when another three a curse at her from behind.  "No!" Draco cried he threw y/n out of the way and saved her from possible death. "You're ok." She said softly. "I'm ok." Draco nodded. He grabbed her hand. "For what its worth, I'm truly sorry." She sighed and shook her head. "It's alright now."

******

The war was over. Harry Potter had won. Everyone could finally breathe a sigh of relief, not him though. Due to draco's families affiliation with the dark lord, he would most probably be shunned the rest of his life. He walked into the great hall and looked as all the happy couples reunited, siblings and parents found each other. Everyone had someone to be with after the war.

Draco watched y/n as she burst through the door and ran straight into Dean's arms. He couldn't but wish it were him instead. He shed a few tears and left. He didn't know where he was going but he had to leave.

****** 6 years later

Draco did leave, he travelled to France, Spain, Greece and Ireland. He stayed in small cottages that he rented in every small town he stayed in. He tried dating occassionally but he never really felt anything like he felt for y/n. He worked in a bakery in one of the towns he lived in (I used to work in a bakery hehe) he learned many skills in his travels He enjoyed the change in scenery but he knew he had to return at some point.

The first place he went to once he returned was a small coffee shop which he loved since he was a child. To his surprise, he saw y/n and Dean over there. He wanted to run, but that would be rude and he did want to talk to them. "Hey." He tapped y/n's shoulder. "Oh Draco, hi!" She gave him a short hug and then he shook Dean's hand. "It's been a long time mate, we thought you disappeared." Dean told Draco jokingly. Draco smiled sheepishly. "I needed to get away for a while." "Yeah we totally get it. The war took a toll on everyone." Y/n said seriously. Draco looked at her hand. It had a shining ring on it. He felt his heart break a bit. All those years and he still wasn't able to move on. "Alright, we'll talk soon. I have to go now." Draco said. "Wait!" Y/n called out. She shared a look with Dean. He nodded. "We want you to come to our wedding. It's next week, it will be great if you came." He said.  "I'll think about it and let you know." Draco said with a small smile.

Eventually, Draco did go to the wedding. It was a small one, but it was beautiful. There were purple and white flowers everywhere and the centrepiece of the table was a small elephant with a candle in its back. As Draco sat at the back, watching the ceremony, the bride and groom saying their vows. When they were about to kiss, Draco glanced at his hand, at the snake ring he still wore. It glew yellow. He didn't know why y/n wore her side of the ring but she had and Draco could see she was happy. Maybe it was finally time to move on and be happy himself.

*****

taglist: @kashishwrites​  (send an ask to be added to my taglist!)

[fakeloveaskblog]

Hi, me again. I have more fun facts.

Did you know that if you eat two hundred finely crushed apple seeds it will kill you. This is due to apple seeds containing amygdalin which is a cyanogenic glycoside composed of cyanide and sugar, that when metabolized degrades into hydrogen cyanide. A lethal dose of which will kill you within minutes.

Did you know that when people are crucified they usually die from asphyxiation because the way their bodies are hung makes it almost impossible to breathe unless they physically hold themselves up instead of just hanging there, and after some many hours it gets to be to much, resulting in oxygen deprivation, unconsciousness, and death.

Did you know that according to some research, a human head may remain conscious for up to 30 seconds after decapitation.

Did you know that a good portion of spiders shed their exoskeletons occasionally, so when you happen to come across a "dead" spider, there's a good chance that it's just an empty husk and there is another, slightly bigger spider nearby.

Did you know that there are several species of mushroom-like fungus that implant their spores into insects, creating a kind of zombie, that will lose its mind, wander off, die, and then it’s corpse will be used as fuel for the next generation of fungus.

Did you know that dogs love squeaky toys because the sound mimics small animal's cries of agony after being bitten.

Also on a more lighthearted note after those slightly disturbing facts, when I first got my cats they would claw at the carpet outside a closed door when they wanted to get in a room and the ended up destroying a lot of carpets that way so I trained them to scratch the door instead which is a much better alternative. Plus it’s like they are knocking on the door which I find really cute. Also my female cat had a favourite toy when she was a kitten, it was a small gray mouse filled with catnip called Mr De-Mouse and she would growl at anyone who got close to her when she had Mr De-Mouse in case they would try to take him away from her. She would sometimes play fetch with him bringing him to me to throw and then bringing him back once I threw him, it was adorable.

Also I hope you are doing okay, I’m sending you lots of virtual love. Have a nice day and remember to stay hydrated.

I did know the apple thing bc my friend used to think that fact was hilarious to the point he emailed it to our teachers kgkf i am also well versed in tje fungus fact bc me and my friend saw a video of an ant becoming a zombie and got convinced that the same fungus could evolve into making bigger animals and eventually human zoombies as well. So for several years we were sire the zombie apocalypse would happen just like in the last of us. I started going to the gym bc i was so sure i would have to protect my loved ones from zombies. The gym!!! Insane!! Fun times.

That crufication fact is so cool. I dont know how but i want to use it someday. Whether it be in real life or in writing. I didnt know how long the head could stay alive but Atrocity guide on youtube recently made a cool ass video aboit human head decaptitation. OH ANd another cool youtuber as well. I love both of their videos. Lemme see if i can find them

https://youtu.be/IZ2YEESTQUI

I cant link the other video but its the latest by Jacob Geller. Neither of the videos have gore dw

I didnt know the dog fact thats kinda sad but it also makes sense. Lil doggos) :

Ur cat sounds so cute 🥺🥺🥺 im just imaginign hearing lil cat knocks omg. Mr De-mouse is a great name btw. Oogoggh having cats sounds so good. Ive never had pets. Thanks mdude 💙🐳 i hope u have a good day too

Dont worry dude. When i say dissociation is slowing my response time down i mean that i got triggered into a catatonic dissociation state today. And when i dissociate i can go in and out of beibg grounded and dissociated for many Many hours. So i am literally physically struggling to move in any way including writing ofc. So having fun facts to think about while laying still is helping tons instead of thiniing of bad things. Grounding myself enough to write a few sentences doesnt hurt me, it just takes a while. At most the dissociation is giving me a headache

[duxhess-kryzewan]

obi wan gets caught in a lie? can be as heavy/light as you want

A/n: hello!! im so sorry for the sudden disappearanc, but im back and will hopefully be posting regularly again!! (also, i didnt quite know how to write a scenario with him lying to satine, so hopefully this stays as true to the characters as possible)

- White Lies - 

Satine had spent a large portion of her youth biting her nails.

She knew it was a nasty habit. Aside from it being unsanitary, it was beyond improper for a lady - especially one of nobility - to do so. It was only during her time on the run with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan that she managed to stop. Partly because she was so distracted by her concern for her people, and partly because trekking through the wilderness of various planets tended to get her hands dirty.

Yet here she stood, in the middle of her Coruscant apartment, chewing absentmindedly on her nails, not caring in the slightest that years of work to break the habit had all been for nothing.

She had been on the planet for two days now, both of them consumed with Senate proposals and a barrage of questions for the neutral systems, most of which were nothing more than ploys to side with the republic. Even in the face of aggressive senators though, Satine had held her ground. While she may be a pacifist, she was still a Mandalorian, and a Mandalorian never backed down from a fight. She was no exception. There wasn't much that shook her these days.

Except, perhaps, the absence of Obi-Wan.

He had promised her he'd be there before the sun set, but the city had been shrouded in darkness for hours now and he was no where to be found. She only commed him twice - not wanting to come off as overbearing - but it was beyond unusual for him not to follow through with his word.

So she commed Padme, the only person who wouldn't question her, and asked if she had seen or heard from him.

"I haven't," The younger woman said, "Anakin hasn't came home yet for me to ask him. If I hear from either of them I'll be sure to let you know."

"Thank you." Satine said before ending the transmission.

So she paced, chewing on her nails and trying her best not to think of the worst possible scenario. He was a Jedi, she rationalized, even if something did happen he was more than capable of taking care of himself.

It didn't help ease her mind.

So when the familiar beeping of a keypad and sound of her door opening sounded through the apartment she couldn't have been more relieved.

She rushed to meet him, barely giving him enough time to shut the door before she threw her arms around his shoulders.

He cradled her against him in response, his hands winding around her tiny frame. She didn't need to be in tune with the force to feel the exhaustion radiating off of him. Yes, something had certainly happened, and it had drained him.

"Are you alright?" Satine asks, pulling away just enough to scan her eyes over him, searching for any kind of wound or otherwise out of place detail.

"I'm fine," He says, reaching out and tucking a bit of stray hair behind her ear, "It's been a challenging day. The council was relentlessly questioning Anakin and I about the events of our most recent mission and then I got tied up with him at Padme's."

Her blood suddenly runs cold, her body all but frozen in his grasp and it took her a moment to truly process what he had just told her.

She pulls away from his grasp and takes a step back, "You weren't at Padme's."

Obi-Wan pauses, mouth slightly agape, a mouthful of words he was planning on saying frozen on the tip of his tongue. If she looked hard enough she's sure she could see them dancing around, begging to be spoken out into the world.

"I commed over there Obi-Wan," She says, "You weren't at Padme's."

He already knew that, of course. His eyes always betrayed him. Not that he was keeping up the charade; he knew he had been caught. There was no point in pretending now.  

"You lied to me," Satine says, not bothering to hide the hurt and confusion in her voice, "Why would you..."

She trails off, unable to bring herself to finish the question. Obi-Wan didn't lie to her. Not ever. Faking his death aside, he had never been anything less than honest with her.

"Satine I..." He too is at a loss for words, eyes wide and full of something unfamiliar. Fear, perhaps? Worry about what the consequences of his falsehood? It makes her feel sick either way.

"Where were you?"

"Please Satine, I promise you, it wasn't anything you need worry about. You know that I would never-" He paused, suddenly unable to finish his statement.

Cheat on her? Yes, she was fairly confident that would never happen. Even in light of his lie she knows without a doubt that was a line that would never be crossed.

"No, you wouldn't." She grants, "But I also thought you would never lie to me. I thought we were honest with one another despite the consequences."

His eyes fill with sadness; a mirage of guilt that she's never seen before and if her heart wasn't already hurting she's sure it would have broken for him all the more.

"I- of course. You're right. I should have never..." He sucks in a shaky breath, "There was an incident. Two really. Bail Organa and Lothals senator were attacked by separatist assassins. They were working on your neutral systems proposal when it happened. It's suspected they wanted to sabotage your place with the Senate. I didn't want to worry you. That's all, I swear it."

Dizziness washes over her. Of course she was always at risk for an attack on her and her beliefs, and of course Obi-Wan tries to shelter her from the horrors of the galaxy despite the fact that she's keenly aware of the atrocities transpiring around her.

"Obi-Wan.."

"That's all it was Satine, I swear. I didn't want to upset you with the news."

"All the same, you lied to me. And you made it look easy Obi-Wan, like it was nothing to you."

He closes his eyes, her words hitting him like a slap in the face and its almost too much for her to bare. As if her words physically stunned him.

"I have to be a good liar, you know that. I lie to the council every time they question the nature of our relationship. I lie to them, but not to you." His voice was steady, more assured than it had been before.

"But you just did."

She wants to stop; wants so badly to calm down and forget about this, but she can't bring herself to do it. Not when it felt like her trust had been violated. There were too many people in her life - valued friends and allies - who had deceived her in the past. Her trust had began wavering amongst the people who crossed her path, but never in Obi-Wan.

He can't look at her and it both breaks her heart and infuriates her more.

"You're right," He says, "And I'm sorry. You've always had that confidence in me and I broke that trust."

"You've never lied to me before," She says, "And it matters that you did it so well, how can I-" She swallows the sudden threat of a sob, "How can I know that this was the only time?"

The words come clawing their way out of her mouth and it stung more than she could have imagined. And maybe she was being unfair; maybe he hadn't thought about how much weight such a simple lie would carry, but it hurt her in places she didn't recognize.

"You know me Satine, you know I would never lie to you about something that really mattered."​ He counters, voice laced with a twinge of frustration.

Her eyes narrow, "And what matters and what doesn't?"

They hadn't fought in months; never fought like this at all. It wasn't unusual for a snide comment to be thrown out here or there, and they certain had their fair share of disagreements, but this? This was something entirely new and she didn't know what to do with it.

"I don't know what you want me to say other than I'm sorry."

She felt dizzy. Trust was something that she valued more than anything. Obi-Wan was the last person she ever thought would betray that. Regardless of the severity of his lie, it stung more than she could have imagined.

She grabs her cloak without a second thought.

"I'm going," She states, "I need to get out for a bit."

He suddenly looks panicked, and for a moment she actually reconsiders leaving, but she knows ultimately its better for her to go calm herself down before she truly said something she didn't mean.  

​"Satine, please."

She sighs, "I'm coming back, Obi-Wan. I need to go clear my head."

"Where are you going?"

"Padme's. Back to Mandalore early perhaps."

His eyes grow sadder when she mentions the latter, "Satine…"

She's out the door before he can finish his protest.

---

The streets of Coruscant were becoming more and more familiar to her with every visit, though she would hesitate to really claim she knew her way around anywhere aside from the heart of the city. Regardless of that fact, she wandered the streets without much care.

Instinctively she wrapped her arms around herself, pressing tightly against her rib cage. It felt like her bones were about to crack open, her heart having experienced too many emotions in such a short period of time. From worry to hurt to anger. It was all too much.

She had been deceived and lied too more times than she could count. But Obi-Wan, her shining Jedi Knight, never had. Not until now.

She stops abruptly, her thoughts suddenly hitting her full force once more with his lie. It hurts her. Frightens her, even, the way her anger had crept into her mind and overtook all rational thinking.

Why would he lie to her? Why would he do the one thing he knew would break her heart more than anything else?

Because he protects you from what he thinks you shouldn't have to see.

Satine frowns, trying to shove the thought out of her mind. But it was useless. She knew it was the truth, that he had always done his best to shield her from dangers and horrors alike. In his mind, she had seen enough wicked things in her youth and endured more attempts on her life than she should have had too. Obi-Wan had always been trying, whether she realized it or not, to keep her from baring more weight.

But the question lingers in the back of her mind; had he lied to her before?

You know he hasn't, She thinks, The look in his eyes when you even suggested it was all the proof you needed.

Another ache soars through her chest. She trusted him. And when she really digs deep down in herself, she knows that she still does. Obi-Wan Kenobi is still the person she trusts most.

So why didn't the pain in her chest fade? She wasn't angry anymore, not really. The cool night air and desolate streets provided release from whatever vexations and grief burrowed within her, and yet something dismal still gnawed at her.

Then the realization hit her.

Obi-Wans absence was the source of her heartache.

She had fled, a momentary lapse in judgement in an effort to calm down, and left him standing in the wreckage of their little time together. They would have to part ways in two days time, and she had effectively cut that even shorter.

She turns around without a second thought.

--

When she steps through the door she finds him in the same spot she left him in, perched on the floor with his eyes closed, legs crossed in the all too familiar pose of meditation. It didn't surprise her. He often did so to sort out his feelings.

The sound of the door didn't cause him to move, nor did the sound of her footsteps coming towards him. He only opened his eyes when she crouched down onto the floor and all but threw herself against him.

He instinctively envelopes her in a hug, cradling her in his arms as they sat on the floor.

"I'm sorry," Satine says, nuzzling her nose against the side of his head, "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for," He murmurs, "I should have just told you from the start. I'm sorry to have deceived you."

She feels guilty all over again. Obi-Wan carried often carried the weight of the galaxy on his shoulders. The last thing she wanted was to add to that.

"No, I-" She drops her cheek against the top of his head and tightens her hold on him, "I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. It was unfair of me. I shouldn't have gotten upset and I certainly shouldn't have walked out. It was wrong on my part."

She often wonders what life would be like if they weren't so tied to their duties. If she weren't born a duchess and he not born a Jedi. If they were simply Ben and Satine, a couple tucked away in a quiet corner of the Galaxy. Would they have fights like this? Or would they bicker over mundane things? Certainly their quarrels would never be as a result of governing bodies or separatists attacks. It would be nice, she thinks, to be so carefree when they were together.

"I've never lied to you before." He tells her, gripping her hand in his own.

"I know you haven't."

"I won't do it again."

"I know."

"Do you forgive me?"

She pulls away from him, worming her way out from his arms enough to look him in the eyes.

"There's nothing to forgive my dear."

Her hands come up to cradle his face, thumbs brushing over his auburn stubble.

"I need you to say it," He tells her, covering her hand with one of his own, "For my own peace of mind."

She smiles softly, "I forgive you."

Wouldn’t she always?

[ackermans-freedom-inc]

Omg i find out about your tumblr I love it you’re are amazing 😭 It’s the first time I write a request and I hope it doesn’t bother you😅 I wanted to know if you can do a fic where Levi and his so, erwin and the other from the sc go to a bar and there’s a singer and yn is staring at him bc she thinks he sings so well and Levi is like « imma kill him » and he is very jealous and sad bc he thinks she is starting to fall in love with him. You can imagine the end Thank you so much for your work❤️

HI HELLO ANON! PLEAAAAAASE do not think you are bothering me ever!! Feel free to send in requests, or just send random asks if you ever want to chat! 

a/n: ok so....I have to confess...I...may be in love with this LawyerAU world...expect more from fics from this AU to come! I also went WAY too hard on this and wrote 2k+ words IM SO SORRY 

Carry a Tune – Modern AU, Lawyer Levi, jealous Levi, fluff!

Leave it to Erwin to pick a place named Martini Blue. Everything about the venue looked classy and upscale, as if you had been transported to a different time. Upon perusing their website, you were pleased to discover that the trendy supper club was also a jazz lounge. You opted to stay in your heels for the rest of the day as you bundled your files into your purse, taking one last look around your cluttered office before turning off the lights and closing the doors.

Peeking your head into the next-door office, your hands running over the plaque on the door: Levi Ackerman | Senior partner, you found your moody boyfriend brooding over his laptop, no doubt putting together the final touches on the memorandum for the Curtis file. Taking a final peek outside to make sure Hanji, you and Levi’s shared legal secretary, had indeed gone for the night, you strode into the office, leaving the heavy glass door open behind you.

“You ready for teambuilding night?” you helped yourself to one of the mints Levi kept on his coffee table as you sprawled out on his leather couch.

“Just about. You ready to go?” Levi’s eyes flicked over your sprawled-out form, frowning when he saw your heels. “You planning on wearing those? I’m not carrying you home again.”

You sat up, teasing smile on your face, “Slander.” You cried, “Slander I say!”

All Levi did was roll his eyes before focusing back on the laptop. After a few more clacks of his keyboard, he sighed, closing the lid and pushing it away from him. “Alright, we can’t keep them waiting.”

You remained where you were, drinking in the lithe form of your boyfriend as he reached over to his coatrack to grab his jacket, his dress shirt somehow managing to accentuate every movement of muscle. As Levi gathered his own files and placed them in his bag, you admired some more.  His tie was perfectly matched to your dress that day, something subtle you two tried to do whenever possible, the end of his tie tucked tightly into the vest of his three-piece suit. Your throat went impossibly dryer when he draped his suit jacket over your bare shoulders before undoing his dress shirt sleeves, dropping his favourite winged cufflinks into the small side pocket of your purse while he rolled his sleeves up, revealing what was your favourite sight, tendrils of black ink peeking out from the still covered portions of his arm.

Offering you a hand, you licked your lips as you took his cool hand in yours, hiking your bag over your elbow and laying your own coat on top. You preferred wearing Levi’s suit jacket anyway, the smell of his cologne washing over you made you feel safe and warm.

As you slid into the car seat, you offered another soft smile and nod, letting Levi know he was safe to close the door. Even after dating for so long, he still insisted on opening and closing your doors for you, his subtle way of showing his love. Your soft smile never left your lips the entire ride to the bar.

You had met Levi when you transferred from the Rose branch of Smith LLP to its newer Maria branch. You were four years out of law school and an up and coming Mergers and Acquisitions lawyer when you were offered the partner position at Maria. While at first you were a bit unsure, the team at Maria quickly became your second family, the work culture the same as it was in Rose. From the moment you laid eyes on him, you were lost. The handsome man, you discovered, had just been poached from Pixis, and made senior partner. Turns out, him and Erwin, the managing partner, had been classmates in law school and when Erwin needed a new senior parter of Tax, Levi was the one who received the call.

Evidently, he had felt the same about you, ordering Erwin to make you as his mentee. You grew close over case briefs, disclosures, memorandums, and countless nights of research. Initially, you had been worried about telling Erwin, mixing personal with professional rarely a good idea. To your surprise, Erwin had clapped Levi on the back before enveloping you in a hug, thanking you. Turns out, the ever observant managing partner had noticed Levi was more relaxed, barking less at the articling students he had working for him, being nicer to clients, and overall less prickly. There was not much for Erwin to worry about though, you were careful to keep your lives carefully compartmentalized, leaving fights at home, and work disagreements in the office.

Every year since your transfer, the associates had ran a bet, seeing if one of them could successfully ask you out. Every year, you pretended to be flattered as Levi pretended not to give more work to the one that was most flirty with you that day. No one aside from Erwin, his secretary Petra, Hanji, Mike, and his secretary Moblit knew that you two were an item. The only reason Mike having found out is when you strode into his office one day to drop off some files and the man sniffed you out, catching a whiff of Levi’s cologne on you.

The car came to a soft stop, the hum of the engine stopping as the locks clicked open, stirring you from your reminiscing. As you gathered your purse and hugged the jacket securely around your shoulders, you felt the breeze brush over your legs as Levi swung the car door open for you, hand outstretched. Taking it, you wrapped your hand around his waist as you turned, pressing a gentle touch to the door handle, a soft beep confirming it was indeed locked. As you both strolled into the restaurant, you spotted Erwin’s tall figure already sat at a lounge table, Hanji waving excitedly at you. You spotted Moblit, Mike, and Petra around the table as well, and waved back at them. Soon, you and Levi were seated with them, a scotch on the rocks for Levi and a Moscow Mule for you placed in front of you before you had time to get comfortable in your chair.

As Erwin teased you about the progression of the associate date pool, Levi only glowered as you recounted the story from last week when an associate scurried to grab you the legal pad you needed from the office and ran smack into Levi in his haste. The poor man had completely wilted after that interaction, aghast at having spilled Levi’s coffee, and skulked around the office with a giant coffee stain on his shirt for the rest of the day.

“My hand slipped!” Levi butted in, crossing his arms in front of him as you laughed, squeezing his knee reassuringly.

Soon, the drinks were emptied, the sharing plates devoured, and the talk had migrated from office chatter to just idle chitchat, Hanji excitedly reminding Erwin that her and Moblit were taking an extra couple days of vacation in Trost after a conference the firm had planned. Nodding and assuring that they would be sorely missed, Erwin turned his attention to you and Levi. “Say, are you two planning on staying a couple extra days as well?” Petra and Mike nodded their agreement to the idea, their eyes shifting to you.

“We hadn’t planned on it, why?” breathed Levi, eyes narrowing in suspicion.

“Oh, no reason, I just took the liberty of making sure neither of you had client meetings, and since your secretary is gone, you might as well take some time off yourselves.” Erwin dismissed Levi’s glare with a wave.

You gulped, really wanting to take the time to explore the town, but not wanting to push Levi to do anything he wasn’t comfortable with. You knew how he preferred to show his love, avoiding grand gestures and outward displays of affection, preferring to instead make sure the little things in your life were taken care of. Although sometimes, you couldn’t help but sigh when you saw a bouquet of roses be delivered to the office for one of the other lawyers.

Thankfully, you didn’t have time to reply as the lights in the restaurant dimmed, a spotlight shining on a stage you didn’t even realize was there as a dapper looking older fellow in a top hat took the stage. He welcomed the crowd to open mic night at Martini Blue and invited someone by the name of “Titan” to take the stage. When this “Titan” took the stage, you chuckled under your breath. He was dressed over the top, a tight dress shirt strapped on even tighter with suspenders, shoes shined so bright you swore you were blinded for a second as they caught the light, and a panama hat atop the brunette’s hair as he gripped a rose between his fingers.

As he took a seat in the barstool on the stage and adjusted his mic, you caught his eye, and before you could look away, he flashed a wide smile at you, his blue/green eyes like the sea. He took the rose from his mouth and handed it to the elderly man who had introduced him, whispering in his ear. Walking too fast for his age, the man had strode over to you, and tucked the rose in your hair, “Eren would like you to have this”, he whispered before hurrying away again to stand by the stage.

Needless to say, the rose did not last long in your hair, Levi yanking it out and sending his best death glare, his angry cry of “It’ll dirty your hair!” barely covered by Erwin’s well-placed cough.

Then Eren started to sing. He sung of love, of loss, of a time long ago, painting a picture of a world not so different than the one you lived in now. “He sings so well” you breathed, enraptured by his voice and the soft jazz accompaniment that suddenly made the space feel romantic and relaxing. Before you knew it, Eren’s set had come to a close and as he bid the audience farewell, he blew a kiss to your general direction and winked.

“I’m gonna kill him”. Levi stood up angrily, making his chair squeal as it dragged across the floor.

“Babe, it’s fine, it’s just showbiz” you tried to calm him down, not wanting to cause a ruckus in the restaurant.

“Just leave us out of it, we want plausible deniability” offered Mike as Petra giggled.

“Why are you defending him?” Levi snapped, glaring in your direction as he stormed out of the restaurant.

Breathing a sigh, you grimaced your apologies to the group as you quickly gathered the jacket still around your body as you chased Levi out the door.

You found him leaned up against a pillar outside the restaurant, looking out at the now darkened sky. As you brushed your shoulder against his, he took your hand.

“I’m sorry” Levi apologized, eyes still not meeting yours. “I’m sorry I’m unable to give you what you want. If you prefer someone like him I won’t fault you.”

You were confused now, furrowing your brows and moving to stand in front of Levi, thankful your heels made you two exactly the same height so you could look directly into his eyes as your heart clenched in your chest. “Babe, what the hell are you talking about?”

“I’m no romantic like that and I can’t carry a tune.” Levi explained, “it felt like you were drifting further and further away as he sang. So I understand if you’re falling for the guy.”

“Drifting away? Maybe because I liked the story he was telling?” you tried to reason with him, still confused “Because we’re at a themed jazz café and perhaps I was imagining and enjoying the atmosphere? What type of nonsense goes on in that brain of yours Levi?”

“You’re…not falling for the guy?”

“Levi you’re crazy. I love you; you know that.”

~

When the others had settled the bill, they came outside to find the two of you leaning against the hood of Levi’s car, stars in each other’s eyes as you leaned in for another sensuous kiss. Clearing his throat, Erwin came by to hand you your purse and Levi his bag, Petra in tow as she was riding home with Erwin. You tore your lips away from Levi and leaned against him, smiling up at your boss and friend. “You know what Erwin? We will take those extra two days after all.”