#in a traumatising and mentally scarring way

[ultravioletrayz]

Sometimes I consider going no contact with my parents, but at the same time they’re my PARENTS.

They gave me life, and they raised me (not very well). It feels cruel to cut them out of my life, despite the fact that all they do is behave cruelly towards me.

I always promised myself the second I was out of that house I’d never talk to them again, but even after almost 4 years of living independently, I can’t escape them and their bullshit.

LIKE PLEASE I’M SICK AND TIRED OF DEALING WITH THE SAME DRAMA FOR OVER A DECADE 😭

[unpunishablelamb]

imma need a pt 2 to the realistic general crp hc’s😭 maybe some specifically hc’s on a few of the characters? finally someone who gets me ☝️☝️ pls and thanks 🫶

realistic creepypasta headcanons part 2

A/N: i gotchu don’t worry- ALSO TYSM TO EVERYONE SENDING ME REQUESTS/LIKING MY STUFF AND TO ALL OF MY NEW FOLLOWERS LOVE U ALL <3

jeff the killer

-man stinks like the devils asscrack

-i touched on this before but he showers like once every two weeks or so

-his converse shoes are so worn down that he gets wet feet when it rains so he probably has another pair cause why tf wouldn’t he he isn’t dumb

-probably stolen military boots

-i think due to his burn scars his remaining hair is very patchy and stringy somewhat and he doesn’t have any lashes or eyebrows cause they burnt off completely

-i think he is low-key misogynistic but not bc he hates women he’s just an edgelord who likes making people mad

-i also think before he became a creepypasta (including the unusual strength/lack of vulnerability) his cuts were legitimately rotting. they probably smelled like decaying flesh and there was definitely some pus action

laughing jack

-also stinks

-i imagine it as a mix of burnt sugar and rotten flesh and like..moldy basement?

-most posts say he eats candy as far as i know but i think he doesn’t technically need to eat

-he probably eats his victims, little kids, their parents and their pets sometimes but just because he thinks it’s funny to see the remaining ones scream and cry

-he is double jointed since he technically doesn’t have joints at all so he folds himself when he’s in his box like a little package

ticci toby

-i feel like he is always portrayed way too nice?! like he literally hates people, he is severely mentally ill and traumatised PLUS he’s a killer

-i feel like he doesn’t have emotional empathy but cognitive empathy which means he can feel empathy but on a logical rather than an emotional level

-he is neutral about waffles

-i feel like sometimes his joints crack when he tics or sometimes he dislocates joints and his limbs just feel kind of stiff (to others this would hurt like hell but he simply can’t feel it)

-he probably has odd shaped fingers and bruises/ scars all over him cause he keeps injuring himself without noticing so his body just kind of grows back together in a strange way

[extremely-judgemental]

I hated Cassian long before Nesta came into the picture. With SF, since it’s his narration, I hoped it would make me like him. Boy, was I wrong. Here are my reasons.

Cassian has a terrible childhood. He grows up in a camp where the adults are abusive and children are pitted against one another. He has to fight, bet and win supplies from other kids to survive. Until Rhysand’s mother takes him in. His life then takes a drastic turn and becomes far more bearable. Cassian’s basic needs such as shelter, clothing and food are taken care by Rhysand and his mother who live in a magical house that caters to them, while the other kids are scavenging for the same at the end of the day.

If you can’t confer this from the little we know about Cassian’s early life, I don’t think you will understand the rest below.

This is a huge privilege Cassian enjoys but never realises. No one else in the camp is ever subjected to this mercy. Cassian’s behaviour or view doesn’t change after experiencing the shift first hand and still carries the victim mentality after five centuries.

This is shown from the way he and Rhysand treat Azriel. He’s older than the two. He has no experience flying or fighting which is a common knowledge and everyone in the camp considers an ‘embarrassment’. Also, he has scar marks on his hands which are very obvious indication of his prior life. He chooses to learn to fly on his own, away from everyone because of the humiliation. Cassian admits, without remorse to the point of boasting about it, to seeking him out, beating Azriel up, and mocking him. This doesn’t happen in a training pit where they have no choice but to fight. Cassian then offers to help him learn, which is very similar to the ‘reach your hand’ tactic he uses with Nesta later.

He is clearly abusive to Azriel, a boy who’s been traumatised by his half-brothers, without a reason. None of his previous excuses of survival apply here as he doesn’t need it. The next day, Rhysand joins him.

A little tangent, I’m still convinced a little that both of them only chose to help this particular boy because of his shadowsinger abilities. They just didn’t want anyone else to get to him first. In the one year in between, they never took anyone under their wing. If they had truly wanted to help, they could have done very well without the abuse. Mocking I understand since it’s a hostile environment of young boys.

Azriel accepts them as friends which is often used as an explanation for Cassian/Rhysand’s good intentions. His own family treated him like a prisoner, his brothers torturing him whenever they pleased. He’s never met anyone outside the ones chosen by his family or known kindness in his life. He doesn’t see this as abuse because he wouldn’t be able to tell right from wrong. He accepts the two boys who beat him to pulp and then ‘help’ him because they are comparatively better than his true brothers who burned his hands for a laugh. It doesn’t make Cassian/Rhysand a better person.

Coming back to Cassian’s privileges. Rhysand is the heir of HL of NC. Other kids could hate him and beat him up in training but no one would threaten his life even if he hadn’t been the strongest. Illyrians may defy Rhysand and his family, but no one is stupid enough to kill one of them. Now, Cassian is literally adopted by the heir and Lady of NC. He reaps all of these benefits through his arrangement whether he admits or not, and through the whole year before he and Rhysand become friends until Azriel’s arrival.

After Rhysand becomes HL, Cassian is made his War General. Sure, he is powerful, and his seven siphons and the Carynthian status prove it. But in the eyes of other soldiers, he’s the one Rhysand favoured over them because they are best friends. It’s a common mentality in such situations and Cassian doesn’t try to prove himself to them.

Illyrians live only in Illyria and in bands. Cassian moved to Velaris when he’s a War General and expected to live among them. While the other Generals and Lords take care of these people, he lives in a secret city and only visits these camps for appearances. He doesn’t own a place here as he always stays at the same Windhaven house, also considering he doesn’t own one in Velaris either. He essentially strips himself away from their core identity and traditions while expecting them to respect him as their own when he lives like a prince since Rhysand.

He also destroys an entire camp avenging his mother right after he becomes a warrior.

During Amarantha’s reign, he’s in Velaris while Illyria is suffering. Since some of the bands are allied with Amarantha, they must have known Cassian and Azriel weren’t UtM, letting them believe IC has truly abandoned their people. Immediately after her death, the three hunt the rest of these bands and kill them instead of giving a proper justice/punishment. After all this, he expects them to obey his commands in a war without questioning him.

In the 500 years, he does nothing to change the lives of these people. There are few mentions of banning wing clipping which is not enforced though. He could have improved the lives of young boys by advocating for better conditions—hostels, proper meals, and clothes without having to fight each other for it, maybe a few new rules for this brutal training. But none of it. He hands out blankets in winter to his people. Given how much Rhysand and Feyre boast about their wealth, they could ration out these provisions for everyone every month or year instead of making it look like charity from Cassian.

In 500 years, he manages to start a female fight club which garnered like. . .20 women (iirc). It’s obvious it was just a plot leading to Valkriyes and for Nesta’s arc. Even then, these women are doing chores and then training. He berates the men around these women, provoking them and returning to Velaris, leaving them to endure more hatred/violence from their people.

He literally doesn’t do anything of importance. He trains, bullies, and picks fights. His dream to reform his race is pathetic since he literally does nothing.

And then there’s Morrigan situation. Everyone makes it sound like a favour he did to her. Cassian could have denied her. He did it only to hurt Azriel and tear the two apart. He admits to his jealousy, and to his regret which he feels after he gets what he wants. And he so vividly describes how the sex goes. This is how far this regret extends. Playing buffer means being in the same room as them so the situation doesn’t get out of hand, or interrupting the conversion to keep it comfortable. But he flirts with Morrigan knowing it hurts Azriel and exchanges inappropriate gifts with her in front of everyone including his mate.

I’m not going to get into the whole SF disaster here. But, there’s one scene in MAF where they visit the Archeron’s estate for the first time. Cassian has so much empathy for the Illyrian women doing chores in the camps but doesn’t extend the same to Nesta who had been doing it since their mother died (or at least after they lost their servants) and their family fell into poverty. He understands the struggles of being poor and his heart breaks for Feyre who once starved but not Nesta and Elain who must have gone through the same too.

Cassian is not a villain in anyone’s story but he’s a man child and bully. He’s a classic abuser whose targets and methods constantly evolve. He’s a hypocrite. He states how grateful he is to Rhysand but not to the perks he enjoys every single day. He loves to play the victim while abusing and hurting the ones around him. He loves to exercise his power and authority while pretending to be an underdog. Illyria being a fucked up place filled with cruel people is just an excuse for Cassian to be cruel. It’s a cover up for how ugly he truly is.

[wylanslcve]

The next time I see someone call Wylan "boring" because his trauma isn't "as bad" as the other Crows' (namely Kaz and Inej's) I'm going to throttle someone. Firstly, trauma isn't comparable: trauma is trauma, regardless of what traumatic experience a person goes through. The point of Six of Crows is that all the Crows are traumatised but find comfort and solace within one another and galvanise each other's healing process.

Secondly, Wylan is a victim of ableism and emotional, mental and physical abuse - which is traumatic - and his story makes me feel physically ill whenever I think about it. As a disabled child, Wylan needed accommodations that his father refused to give him: instead, J*n treated him as something that needed fixing, and treated his disability as pure stubbornness that could be forced out of him with punishment and abuse. He "tried specialists, tonics, beatings, hypnotism" - which are traumatic. J*n also manipulated Wylan into believing that it was his fault by constantly shifting the blame to him (a behaviour very typical amongst abusers). As a result, Wylan never acknowledged his father's behaviour as abusive, which is why he tells Jesper in Crooked Kingdom that "he isn't evil" despite J*n literally trying to kill him twice. In fact, Wylan tries to justify how his father treated him, claiming that he "had done his best to care for his son, and if he’d failed, then the defect lay with Wylan." He also takes it as a display of affection and the desire to protect him, claiming that "his father might sound cruel, but he wasn’t just protecting himself or the Van Eck empire, he was protecting Wylan as well."

Wylan blaming himself for his father's actions doesn't stop there: in the period after Inej is kidnapped by J*n, Wylan feels responsible for what happened despite knowing that "he couldn’t have prevented his father from double-crossing the crew and kidnapping her. He knew that, but he still felt responsible". The guilt is eating away at him because he's so accustomed to taking the blame for his father's wrongdoings. Even after finding out the truth about his mother, which was really the catalyst for him recognising that J*n is indeed evil, his initial response is him blaming himself for it: "it was me. I caused this. He wanted a new wife. He wanted an heir. A real heir, not a moron who can barely spell his own name." This is only made even more sickening when we learn that Wylan would hear how his parents "fought all the time, sometimes about me", which would only amplify his feelings of responsibility for his father sending Marya away, stripping her of her life, family and fortune.

This is all without him not being allowed to grieve his mother's "death". This is all without the imposter syndrome and self-loathing Wylan experiences as a result of all of this, the fear that the Crows would see him as worthless and defective the way his father did and abandon him.

tl;dr: stop overlooking Wylan's trauma because he too has deep mental and emotional scars.

[simp4konig]

Nikto x Reader Angst Drabble

You love Nikto. But Nikto does not love anybody.

Word count: 829

Allusions to smut! Readers are warned for mentions of NSFW.

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"I do not love you."

You're bent over, hands clutching the bedsheets, fingers bunching up the fabric in a shaky, white-knuckle grip.

Nikto, who had been thrusting into you, was still, as still as a statue, and, although you cannot see his eyes, you imagine them to be stony, the expression under the metal mesh plate of a mask stoic, unresponsive. Disgusted.

Five words. Just five single syllables, whispered in a voice that is hoarse from groaning, gravelly and rough like always. A voice which belongs to Nikto, the voice that you had hopelessly fallen in love with, despite how reckless of you it was for you to grow accustomed to it, to be comforted by it. To find solace in it.

You hadn't meant to let it slip. You really hadn't. It was in the heat of the moment, even though those feelings were anything but. Those feelings were a fire, and Nikto the fuel, a finite source that you should have known better than to extract from.

He would be gone for weeks, for nights, months at a time, deployed on missions with intel classified to you. You never knew what would happen, what was the goal, where, and why. What you would know is that Nikto survived each time.

And what you do know is that you're a toy for him to be used, abused, and reused, dumping weeks' worth of semen into you.

You enjoyed it. Nikto enjoyed it. Really, it was meant to be no strings attached — just a case of arriving at your apartment when least expected, the intensity of his gaze enough for you to realise his intentions, and you'd be bent over the nearest surface before you could do so much as blink, clothes discarded haphazardly on the floor and half-naked.

Nikto did not exert warmth. Not comfort, nor love. Stoic and stone-cold, his heart a hard rock incapable of oozing love for anything, his mind irreversibly damaged and traumatised, he was incapable of emotion, of feelings. Incapable of reciprocating your feelings.

Aftercare was nonexistent. Every careful caress of his scarred skin, every tentative touch on an area that is sensitive, even the merest of kisses that appeared too intimate, too affectionate, too full of care, were swatted, spat on, and chastised. Nikto's nose scrunched in utter disgust at the prospect of intimacy, and he positively felt sick to his stomach whenever you mistakenly kissed him, too lost in the moment for the consequences of such a mindless action to register.

You were meant to be a toy. And that's all you are. That's all you are, you repeated, was reiterated, was reinforced.

Yet, you longed for more. How fucking pathetic of you to think that Nikto could offer you more.

"I..."

Licking your dry lips, you swallow the build-up of saliva in your mouth, throat bobbing up and down as you do so. Although drool had collected at the corner of your mouth in pleasure, saliva built up from guilt, from shame, from humiliation.

You lie through the skin of your teeth, thankful that your facial expression isn't visible to Nikto from this position: "I— I-I didn't mean it in... in that way. You— you know that, Nikto."

Tears collect in your eyes. Why couldn't you have contented yourself with the sex? His presence? His existence? Why did you have to fall in love with a man who would never, ever love you?

"I meant— I meant I love what you're doing. W-what you're doing to me. J-just— it feels so, so good."

He grunts in acknowledgement, and you gulp a little too audibly for your liking, blinking profusely in the hope that you convinced him enough.

His callous fingers tangle themselves in your hair, fingertips scratching your scalp — not fingernails, because some are missing. It never warranted an explanation because you didn't deserve one.

The silence is deafening. For those seconds, you don't dare breathe. Your eyes are wide, panic-stricken, and you're mentally praying for any salvation, for any mercy — anything.

Finally, Nikto's grip on your scalp loosens, seemingly satisfied with your answer, and he resumes his thrusts, grunting into your ear again.

A quiet moan escapes your lips, and you squeeze your eyes shut, willing the tears to go away.

"Good," he laughs, laughing a cruel, callous laugh, apathetic. "And I love it when you keep that mouth shut. So keep it shut, or I'll cut that tongue out if you keep letting such shit leave that goddamn mouth."

You feel so pathetic. So ashamed. So humiliated.

And you are. You really are.

But you can savour his touch for a few moments more, lose yourself in the pleasure for a some more thrusts, orgasm some more, until Nikto decides that he is satisfied, and abandons your apartment to return to the barracks.

And who knows? Maybe this is the last time he will ever come back to you — abandon your apartment forever without a word of goodbye.

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Haven't written in a while, but this came to me as I was on c.ai, and the inspiration was so strong that I wrote this all in one sitting lolol 😝

Still obsessed w Nikto behind the scenes. I am on my KNEES 🛐, PLEASE GIVE ME MORE NIKTO CONTENT I AM IN NEED 😭🙏😭🙏😭🙏 IDC IF YOU DO NOT FOLLOW ME OR KNOW ME TAG ME IN ANYTHING I NEED IT SO BAD 😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏

Anyways although this isn't my headcanon, it suits Nikto's character, and as tragic it is for me to imagine this, it's pretty accurate (I would say)... 🥲💔

[a-hundred-musings]

You know, here's a small rant from me: I hate it when Celebrimbor is shown to be a "softie-boy" or a "naïve child" or just... someone condescending and stupid. Like, yeah I'm guilty of it too (who isn't?) but it just makes me wonder why he's presented as that in fics anywhere.

I read this fic on AO3? Celebrimbor is a stupid duck. Or he's just very naïve and easy to prank. I read another fic? Celebrimbor is a whiny baby who can't stand up for himself. I read another one? He's a man-child.

Look, I get why he's presented in that way, but can we not do that? Especially considering the things this boy has gone through which really wouldn't make him a "child-like" person, but more of a mature adult who has experienced things no one should ever experience.

Before and during the First Age, he's experienced so much:

Nerdanel and Feanor falling out -- that basically messed up entire Aman back then, but mainly their kids, so imagine how Curufin would have reacted to that.

The feud between Feanor and Fingolfin and Finarfin

The time when Feanor threatened Fingolfin

The time when the Two Trees were destroyed

The time when Melkor killed his great-grandfather Finwe.

Feanor going Mad™

The uprising of the Noldor

The First Kinslaying

His grandfather going feral and his father and uncles swearing an oath on a literal suicide-mission

One of his youngest uncles getting burned and basically died (or lived, depends on which version you follow)

A time of literal darkness. Like, no light at all. It really messed up the psyche of so many people.

Feanor abandoning his brother on the shores of Valinor -- that would mess up anyone really.

A literal battle. Like, more blood is being shed -- not only of elves, but of other creatures Tyelpe has probably never seen or heard of before.

His grandfather being so consumed by his fire and spontaneously combusting. That too, he either saw or heard of Feanor literally bursting into flames -- that is pretty traumatising.

The crossing of the Helcaraxe -- no seriously, that would mess anyone up knowing that people they love are literally walking on glaciers and over deathly waters with a 50% chance of survival.

Maedhros being crowned King of the Noldor, and an unspoken fact that there is more than one king of the Noldor -- the political implications here...

The abduction of Maedhros. Need this be explained further?

His uncles and father being concerningly close to starting a whole world-war

The rising of the Sun and the moon (like, what are those big spheres in the sky? Are they something from Melkor? Are they a sign of the End™? What is it?)

The arrival of Fingolfin's group, with more dead and furious people.

The mental health of everyone deteriorating. No, I won't explain because this era was filled with bad times.

No one knowing what to do now, since Maglor was naturally crowned the Regent King of the Noldor, and he has his own problems.

After 34 years of wondering what on earth has happened to Maedhros, he returns scarred with no right hand, and presumed torture marks.

Everyone literally holding their breaths for what will happen next.

Maedhros surrendering his crown to Fingolfin. That would hurt bad like a blow.

Literally only a few years of peace filled with tension.

Fingolfin decides to kick Melkor's arse and dies.

The Nirnaeth Arnoediad.

The Second Kinslaying.

The Fall of Gondolin

Making the decision of abandoning his father and uncles, going on his own separate path.

The death of so many of his family members and father and uncles. That is messed up. The amount of psychological trauma he's already been through...

Like, imagine his guilt of not being there with his father, imagine how much he second-guessed his actions...

The Third Kinslaying. The deaths of more elves, his uncle (or uncles), and really, just more death.

The crown of the Noldor being passed on so many times until it reached Gil-Galad. Imagine the humiliation and just the shock of the realisation of the number of people who have been crowned within a span of a few centuries.

The kidnapping of Elrond and Elros. While it probably wouldn't harm Tyelpe's psychological health, it must have been pretty messed up to find out that your two remaining uncles have committed a few more war crimes.

The War of the Wrath. Now, while it was mainly against Men, there is no doubt that some elves have been killed due to the war (given Gil-Galad's camps etc), so imagine him getting into some stray fights with the orcs or those Men who follow Melkor.

The Fourth Kinslaying. No need to further elaborate.

The death of Maedhros, and Maglor becoming a cryptid. Who wouldn't that mess up?

Surviving the First Age. Like, give this Tyelpe the recognition he truly deserves. Give him a few rings and trophies for enduring so long and he still hasn't gone down to insanity. That too, all this happened within the span of like, 600 years.

The Second Age:

Beleriand is under the sea

His "cousins" (Elrond and Elros) going their separate ways

The death of Elros (I think this is pretty self-explanatory, given the numerous HCs on the twins and Celebrimbor)

No one has any idea what has happened to Maglor. Is he alive? Is he dead? Who knows.

Rumours of a sinister evil lurking in the shadows and really, some tensions are visibly arising.

He finds this very powerful and alluring stranger who knows quite a bit about the art of smithing. They collaborate despite warnings from Galadriel, Gil-Galad, Elrond and a few others.

After giving thought to make powerful rings, Annatar watches over as Celebrimbor makes the rings for Men and Dwarves.

Newsflash: Annatar wants the rings, and he tainted them.

Celebrimbor makes the 3 Elven Rings in secret so Annatar can't get to them, but he gets kidnapped and tortured.

Like, really badly tortured. Annatar wants those 3 rings.

Celebrimbor eventually is killed, and is impaled on a spear, then given to Gil-Galad's camp after years of torture.

He went straight to his family. Can't tell if this will add to his trauma, but still.

While he didn't survive the Second Age, this boy went through so much pain, and... really, I feel like he doesn't get much of the appreciation he deserves.

Thank you for coming to my little rant as to why we need more fics that paint Celebrimbor as someone who isn't a stupid and naïve child, but more of a wiser version of Feanor and Curufin. He is not a tantrummy baby, for Ilúvatar's sake!

[psyaurorak]

One of the patterns i’ve noticed in LO is how it cherry picks who has trauma

Exhibit A: “the traitors are all traumatised EXCEPT Zeus! He doesnt have physical scars so CLEARLY hes oKaY”

Exhibit B: Demeter is coerced into sex (thats rxpe legit) but its never explored (demeters trauma in general isnt explored) and ive noticed that Smythe holds Persephone to a higher regard than the other women. Its Persephone’s trauma over Minthe’s trauma, Persephones trauma over hera’s trauma etc etc. Persephone is always the focus and it grates on my nerves. Like you should explore her trauma! But dont use it as an excuse for her to bully people or dismiss others trauma (she did that to Zeus)

Theres also Exhibit C: “Persephone as the perfect victim who you feel sorry for”

Theres a harmful trope in media that portrays that some traumatised people deserve more because its easier to feel sympathy for them

For example, Persephone is deserving of better treatment because she is kind and compassionate. She is deserving because shes pitiful etc etc. However, victims like Minthe who lash out at the world and struggle with mental illness (BPD) are treated with cruelty. And its seen as justified!

I cant believe how i need to explain that writing a character with BPD, naming a chapter ‘splitting’ but when you get criticism its ‘she doesnt now!’ is AWFUL. That doesnt change SHIT smythe. You wrote her with it, we cant ignore that now. You cant just retcon it now!

And this trope of the perfect victim harms ALL victims. Rachels message isnt progressive and the way she writes trauma to facilliate relationships (H&P) or demonise individuals is disrespectful.

Rachel needs to think about the messages she spreads because this is NOT good.

[youbutstupid]

Let’s talk about the Hankels and why, despite Reid having a bucket load of trauma, this particular event is portrayed as Reid’s biggest and most traumatic event.

So, besides Hankel, Reid has been shot multiple times, held hostage multiple times, kidnapped, imprisoned, beat up, you name it. But despite all of this, throughout the show we see glances, like the ones in 12x13, of the fact that Tobias Hankel is the biggest stressor of Reid’s life, and I want to discuss why that is.

In order to do this, I want to stress that people need to understand that he was not just kidnapped and beat up: that on its own would be horrific enough, but a truck load of other things happened during and after those two days of hell.

First we have the obvious; he was kidnapped and beat up. This is horrific, this alone would traumatise absolutely anybody. Then we have the fact that he was drugged and as a result of this, he became addicted to said drugs. People don’t seem to understand how two days of drug use can turn into an addiction but addiction is a tricky disease and a whole range of factors can contribute to how fast you get addicted, such as physical health, mental health, the strength of the drug, the type of drug, the circumstances in which it was given, genetics and also Reid’s eidetic memory. Because all of these factors were working against Reid in that time; he was physically weak, he was traumatised, he was given drug store heroin laced with psychedelics which are highly addictive, he was given them at his weakest, his genetics from his mum’s side mean that he is more susceptible to to psychosis and reliance and also he will never be able to forget the relief of his first high, it’s clear to see why he got addicted.

So he is kidnapped, beaten up and then basically given a narcotics addiction, next he is forced to choose someone to die and then they get killed right in front of him. Hankel tells him if he picks a woman, then he can save the other two and his team can save the woman he picks, but his team don’t get there in time and Reid has to watch as the woman he picks is murdered and he has to grapple with the guilt of knowing he contributed to that.

Then you have him literally dying. He died in one of the slowest and most painful ways possible, he had to lie there and choke on his own saliva until he could no longer keep any air in his lungs. He is brought back and the hell carries on.

Hankel keeps playing mind games with him, using religious phrasing to tell him that he is guilty of something and should atone for his sins and at that point, Reid convinces himself that there is something he is guilty of and that is being a bad son.

Because of this, he is then forced at his weakest to walk on his injured foot, with his arms bound and find a plot on a graveyard so that he can begin to dig his own grave. The mental and physical torture of this one act would be enough to ruin anybody.

Then, he gets the chance to kill his attacker, and he has to watch as Tobias dies. This kills Reid, because he saw Tobias as completely innocent and just a product of his father who was pulling the strings in Tobias’ mind.

Keep in mind, all of the above happened in the space of just 2 days when Reid was just a 25 year old agent who was barely even allowed field experience.

After all of this, after Reid’s world and his view on life gets destroyed, everything and everyone goes back to normal and he is left alone to deal with what happened to him. He is now an addict, he has ptsd, he has track marks on his arms and scars, any innocence he had left is gone and his mind which once was his biggest saviour was now working against him. Yet, the world is still spinning, and his coworkers have moved on and no one glances at him when his hands are shaking and he is having a flashback because they have their own lives and concerns and he is left alone with this.

In the years after Hankel, he is completely alone in trying to get sober from his addiction, he is alone when he is trying to grapple with his ptsd, he is alone as he is trying to adjust to work and being back on the field and he is alone in grieving the person he used to be. People say that when you grieve, you begin to get angry that the world is moving on as if nothing is wrong, and I truly believe that is why he is so angry in the last half of season 2.

So it is clear to see why the events of 2x15 still seem to overpower any additional trauma that Reid obtains in later seasons because they literally changed everything for him.

[ryuichirou]

Replies

A couple of replies today

bbhowie asked:

your art is so sensual and sharp, i’m not even in some of the fandoms you draw for but i’m following anyway bc it’s all so hot! thank you for sharing your talent with the world!

I appreciate it so much!! <3 This is such a nice thing to hear, I am very happy that you like my art and enjoy it even if it’s a fanart of things that you don’t really care about.

Thank you for your kind words!

Anonymous asked:

What did Idia do to make Lilia punish him? (Not really a punishment tho, I’d like to be up against the old man’s bare chest too)

(this is about this drawing)

To be honest, I didn’t really think about it much; I guess he was just saying some bratty stuff. I really love it when Idia is being annoying or has no filter, and even though Lilia is usually pretty chill around him or just overpowers him with the sheer dominance that he radiates, I like to think that sometimes he wouldn’t even bother and will just go “JAIL” and shove Idia’s head under his shirt to make him shut up for a moment. The fact that Idia would get flustered and freaked out is a sweet bonus that would make Lilia enjoy himself tremendously~ Totally worth it.

Anonymous asked:

I need to get this off my mind before I combust.

So

Imagine this being the first few weeks of the OctoTrio coming to land and they are exploring their new bodies   , Floyd sees this dick and when he touched it he was exploring a new sensation...... THEN HE SPINS IT AROUND LIKE A HELICOPTER AND IT LIKE "Azul!!!!! Jade!!!!!! COME LOOK AT THIS NEW TRICK I HAVE LEARNED THAT HUMAN BODIES CAN DO"!!!!!

Okay time for my ask now,

So I am the same person about the merman and human sex and if the trio would use a potion to turn their lovers into mermans themselves.

So, I know the twins are into biting ( especially Floyd) , maybe Azul too.

But, would the twins for as far as of biting to "mark" their mates?

I mean like not the light biting, a little bleeding kind.

I mean, they absolutely sink their teeth in, kind of like a devoting type of way when they are biting to make sure it will scar and permanently leave a mark, and absolutely make sure that everyone can see it.

Omg the first part of the ask NOOOO Floyd never should have been entrusted with a dick. This toy is too dangerous, and Floyd will find a way to traumatise everyone around with it both physically and mentally, but also monetary because someone would have to pay a fine for acting inappropriately….

To answer your question, I think Azul bites, but not as much as the tweels: he’s more of a squeezer-pincher, so I guess he would leave bruises instead lol

And the tweels bite A LOT. I’m not sure if this is an eel mermen thing or just the Leech bros thing, but I wouldn’t be surprised if someone who is their long-term lover would be covered in deep scars. I guess it’s “marking” in a way? Because there is no way you wouldn’t think it’s Jade and/or Floyd who did it, so of course it’s their way to show who their lover belong to, but they don’t have an instinct inside their heads to “claim” someone. They’ll bite a lot though! I think I always draw them either biting or licking others lol especially Floyd.

Anonymous asked:

merman sex is all well and good, but the real question we should be asking is another: would any of the boys be up to have sex with Jack while he's... you know... using his UM?

You know, Anon… there is this one artist on pixiv who draws beautiful JackVil with this exact theme… so my go-to is always to think of Vil, even though he is probably the one who would be the least expected to be into this type of stuff. I guess Jack is that much of a good boy 😭

I don’t know if any of the boys would actively think about it or even anticipate it, but honestly I want to believe that every boy we ship Jack with would enjoy it to his own surprise. Deuce got spooked by just a knot, imagine him getting the whole package.

[cult-of-the-eye]

inspired by @archivus' statements, i decided to give it a try myself

tw for depersonalisation, body image issues, body horror, slight gore

Out of Body Experience

Statement of Rebekah Fitch, regarding something that wasn’t her body. Original statement given 5th March 2018. Recording by [REDACTED], Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, Manchester. Committed to tape 26th March 2024. 

Statement begins. 

I never thought I would end up like this. I just-

I guess I should start from the start. 

Throughout my life, I’ve had a complicated relationship with my body. Not to get too, um, personal or anything, but let’s just say it's tough being the child of an immigrant mother, especially, well, my mother. She would make comments about my body, small ones, I’ll admit, but ones that certainly built up to…recent events. On top of all that, I spent a lot of my teen years dissociating. Tricking my brain into believing that I wasn’t real. That nothing was. It’s a bit difficult to solidify an image of your body when half of you is ashamed of it and the other half doesn’t even consider your ownership of one. Ownership. I guess that’s sort of where it all began. 

It was sometime in January when it all started to go wrong. I don’t exactly have a habit of staring at myself in the mirror, in fact, the only mirror I own in my cramped little flat is the bathroom one. It’s somehow always stained, a fact which I hesitate to admit helped me live with my…issues. The point is, the majority of the time, I didn’t know how I looked.

And then one day, I watched myself wake up. 

I remember exactly how it felt. You know how people sometimes slice oranges in half and then take the peel, dig their fingers into the sides and push, letting each segment split from the other, hungrily leaning up towards you? That’s how I felt. Inverted. Wrong. I saw myself in a way that I had never, ever seen before. Each and every part of me that bulged where it shouldn’t have, thinned and yellowed at the edges like a fruit in its off-season. Whatever was happening to my eyes didn’t hurt, exactly, but I could feel every single part of my body as if it had suddenly awoken from a deep unconsciousness. It disgusted me. The life of it all. I panicked, of course, I thought I was having a really, really bad dream and that all I needed to do was wake up. But, no matter how many times I attempted to shield myself from the view, no matter how many times I willed every single synapse in my brain to connect and let my goddamn eyes close, nothing happened. 

That nothing was the most excruciating nothing that I had ever experienced in my life. I was forced open, boneless and writhing. The me on the bed that I was watching slept soundly. 

I don’t remember when I snapped out of it. I don’t remember how long it had been. I sat up, drenched in sweat, determined to be rid of the one mirror I had left. Putting it in the bin didn’t feel as triumphant as I believed it would. I guess part of me knew that this was no one-off. 

Ok, I know what you’re thinking. It could just be a hallucination. I could be traumatised or mentally ill or on drugs. Well, I’m actually all of those things, which means that I have the unique ability to prove you wrong. I know what a hallucination feels like, I know what drug side effects feel like, and I know what my episodes feel like. And this? This was entirely separate. I don’t have to tell you that it happened again. I don’t have to tell you that I went from GP to GP, therapist to therapist to find out what was happening to me. But I will end this with proof. 

Statement Ends. 

Post-statement records include a medical report of one Rebekah Fitch. It outlines a series of scars of unidentified means on the underside of her eyelids, spelling out the phrase “I know that I exist.” Any attempts to follow up have led to dead ends. However, I’m afraid that I may be able to guess how this one ends.

[tea-and-secrets]

1.My family doesn’t respect my boundaries at all and expects me to talk to them anyway. I fucking hate my older sister. Stop talking to me. Stop looking at me. Stop following me around. When I call you annoying I mean it. I don’t care that you have mental illness you're not the only one. I am not a fucking stress toy you can poke. I keep telling you that I don’t want to talk to anyone at all and yet you keep annoying me. I fucking hate my parents. I don’t want to talk. Stop making jokes about me. Stop treating me like a fucking pet. My younger sister is just an asshole in general. She screams at everyone at mild inconvenience. And I’m a fucking hypocrite for judging her for that because I do too. I scream at them when they all talk to me. I fucking hate when people talk to me. I fucking hate the noise. Stop talking to me at the same time it's overstimulating it stresses me out and I keep telling my parents about it anytime they do it but they don't take it seriously because "I have read something online and made it up about myself". I hate talking to people. I am an introvert and I need time to charge my social battery to talk to someone for at least 15 minutes. They don’t let me. They keep speaking to me. It’s all too loud. Please shut up. I wish there was a mute button for everything. I wish I could mute all of you forever and never speak to a person

2.And also they expect me to forgive me for something terrible they’ve done in the past that traumatised me so bad they almost feel like bad dreams? Like I bareltbremember 2023/2022 because it's the year where my mother used to drag me by my hair for having anxiety attacks publicly yay (woah beating me up for having social anxiety didn’t help me get rid of it and actually just made it far worse?? no way) !! I don’t remember whichever year it happened, but my older sister once carried me deep into the sea and dropped me into the water to ‘help me learn to swim’, definitely didn’t mentally scar me at all that I almost drowned because of her! When I went out the water and kept calling her a monster I was called overly dramatically by mother. I was 7-8"¿ I think I was 5 where my parents used to waterboard me as a punishment (aka shoving me into shower and turning the water pressure at max so it psychically hurt me)?? Don't remember the feeling but thinking about it mentally hurts. Real fun. Parents when beating up barely conscious children for misbehaving gives their children trauma: 🤯

3.my favourite inanimate insanity character is taco I am not rereading allat for errors send ask

.

[gegegegegesworld]

Apology to the fandom

Hello everyone, I am Panda (Potaxiepower formerly known as Kimetsunozushi69) and I want to write this post in order to own my mistakes and to apologise to the ones involved in this situation.

First of all, I am aware of my humour, which has crossed the line many times. I want to seriously apologise for the disgusting jokes that I did without any consideration of people's feelings. I want to clarify that I am not racist, I have no intention of discrimination against anyone.

I will never cross the lines ever again, and I will face the consequences of my actions which harmed many people in this fandom.

I do not expect people to forgive me, because what I said was truly unforgivable, but from now on, I will mature and I will become better.

In regards of others aspects, I want to talk about the way I treated the members involved in this situation, I am sure you all know this, but I was accused of being abusive to some members of this fandom, which I will admit that my behaviour was unacceptable, and my personal struggles and my own problems do not justify the actions that I committed against the people involved.

I admit that I was a very toxic friend, and I never knew how far my actions were until I realised that my harm to them was scarring and traumatising. I admit that my behaviour towards them is irredeemable and that not an apology can fix the consequences of my actions.

None of them truly hurt me, I was the one who was in a bad mental state and because of that I started to wrongly accuse them of things that they were not, and also badmouthing them and manipulating the situation to favour me, which after months of reflection, I realised that that was truly despicable behaviour.

I admit that I did all of this based on my own envy over them being better artists, academically brighter and better writers than me, which made me have an inferiority complex against them and because of that I was acting toxic towards them. 

Even when they supported me in my hard times, I was ungrateful and despite them showing emotional and financial support, I was not willing to recognise their efforts to be my friends, because of my ego.

I understand why this situation is happening, because I cannot escape from my actions, I do not expect the fandom to ever forgive, and I understand that, I will face the consequences of what has happened this summer time.

I am sorry for ghosting the victims of the situation after doing enough harm and not apologising genuinely because I was a coward who did not want to accept my mistakes, and I understand why the situation escalated to worse after months.

I also understand why everyone in this fandom is currently furious over this, because I escaped and deleted everything without any explanation, this time, I will face the fandom and listen to your complains, I also will leave the fandom after this in order to start a new phase of my life where in the future I will not commit the same mistakes again.

I also want to clarify that none of my old followers or friends stalked any of the members, I was not aware of them facing harassment online, I am not lying when I say that I had everyone blocked which made me not interact with their posts or be interested in what they were posting, because I didn't want to see what they were doing (because I was ghosting) and I admit that I was talking bad about them behind their backs despite me promising to them that I would not talk about them, but I did not send hate because all the frustration that I had was thrown towards my close friends who were not interested in creating conflicts.

I recently found out that they were receiving some hate regarding the call-out, I did not send anyone. I promise everyone that I was inactive online and was scared of looking at what was happening, and I was with family members and real life friends these past two days.

MeitoMela and Meerudraws are innocent, they never had any vile intentions nor any interest in engaging in discourse, and them being friends and mutuals with me does not mean that they are on my side, nor do they agree with my actions nor are they interested in engaging in this.

Thank you very much for reading this letter, and I hope that the victims of this will find peace and help, and I wish everyone the best and happy holidays.

@irithnova

@tianshiisdead

@miyuecakes

[wind-becomes-lightning]

congratulations on 1000, nisi!! you've absolutely earned it.

may i request obkkrin with the angst prompt waking someone up from a nightmare?

thank you!!

Hello!! 5 months later CRMCRM here it is! I had such a good idea and then it just fizzled out later on sigh, but I hope it is still ok for you! Thank you for your request.

_

Obito X Kakashi x Rin

Everybody Lives Au

1707 words

Though it was almost illegally hot and they were way too close to each other in this bed that really should be a size bigger, Obito woke in the middle of the night not from the heat or a stray arm in his face, but from a rather quiet, but district, whine.

His eyes were open immediately, heart hammering against his chest as he turned to the side to the origin of the noise. Rin had been rolled up against him like a cat and was now cramped over, her face a grimace. He sighed silently. Even while having a nightmare Rin seemed to try to inconvenience him as little as possible. Still, he had heard her desperation anyway.

Slowly stretching forward he realised Kakashi was awake too to her other side. The two boys shared a look that told them that they’d proceed as usual with waking her up softly and bringing her back to reality. Over the years they had gotten well versed into what the other needed and wanted, but it always made Obito nervous nonetheless.

They all had their demons that were haunting them. Though the tumultuous early years of their friendship was long behind them with the war having ended in a long period of hopefully lasting peace, the scars were all too visible. All three of them not only carried them on their bodies, but also on their souls.

To combat this they had always stuck together. Other people around them might understand, reasonably, what kind of trauma they had gone through, but nobody understood their inner workings as well as each other. Going through such a traumatic event really bound one together forever.

And though all of them were haunted by their past, Rin surely had it the worst of all of them. While Obito hated crowded, dark spaces and Kakashi smelled blood in places where there wasn’t any, Rin relieved the moment of her death in her nightmares time and time again. Though she had only been dead for a couple of seconds before the Two Tails brought her back to life, she did remember the moment really well.

And though she had a good reason to b e traumatised, maybe a better reason than the other two combined, she usually kept it on the down load. Rin had only advanced her medical knowledge since she was a child and understood how to take care of her physical and mental scars. She didn’t need a specialist like Obito and Kakashi did, because she was a specialist. So the cracks didn’t show right away.

By now of course, they knew exactly what was going on with her. They had spent enough nights right next to each other to understand that the perfectly curated face was just a mask that crumbled once she fell asleep. And even then, Rin kept her cool. Low voiced, quiet whines and grimaced facial expressions really were the only way they could see that she was once again stuck in an endless hallway of a nightmare.

“Oh that little thing?” Rin had asked with a little laugh last time the boys had addressed the issue. “I get by myself, you don’t have to worry about me.” It seemed so fake that even Obito thought that she was probably lying.

“We can’t force her to tell us,” Kakashi said one day after they had once again found Rin struggling with nightmares, “she would need to come to us and explain it. Otherwise we will just be an annoyance.” Obito had argued, in vain, that sometimes you needed to push people a little to find out what they really felt, but Kakashi was adamant. So they decided that from now on they would always gently wake her, but then not ask about the dream.

So they once again stared at each other while Rin was clearly suffering and Kakashi’s intense eyes on him told Obito that he wordlessly was trying to make it clear that today they wouldn't diverge from the plan either. 

Obito reached over to Rin’s face and gently pulled a strand of hair out of her face. The touch made her twitch, but it didn’t wake her up yet. From the other side, Kakashi moved closer to her, moving his nose right next to her ear. If it were Obito, he had already woken up from Kakashi’s heavy breath in his neck, nightmare or not.

“Rin,” Kakashi said in a soft voice that always gave Obito goosebumps, “We are here, Rin, wake up.”

It took a moment. At first her irregular breathing suddenly seemed like it calmed down. Then her fingers and toes twitched and then, after Kakashi had called her again, Rin finally woke up. Her eyes focused on Obito first, while he kept stroking her cheek in return to help her understand where she was.

“Oh,” Rin said eventually when she had a moment to assess the situation, “Did I wake you all up?” She laughed a little embarrassed. “I guess I can also be kind of a rough sleeper.” 

It was always like this. Obito bit his lower lip. She always pretended like everything was alright, as if the others hadn’t just witnessed her toss and turn in a nightmare, as if they couldn’t hear her whines. He wanted to call her out for the obvious lie, but met Kakashi’s strict eyes and remembered how they had agreed to exactly not do that. Stupid Kakashi.

“Thank you guys for waking me up, I will try to disturb you less next time”, Rin showed them a weak smile and then gestured to the door. “I will just go to the toilet quickly, you guys can go back to sleep.” She hurried out of the room.

Maybe it was the heat or the desperation or just the way Kakashi looked at him, but Obito felt agitated. Rin was clearly just going away so she could process her feelings by herself. As her partners it was their duty to ask, no matter what Kakashi said. What the hell did he know about the feelings of others? He had just lucked himself into good looks and two people that were so bonded with him that they loved him.

“Don’t say anything, remember?” Kakashi whispered to him as if he had read his mind. “She has to come to us of her own choice”

Obito rolled his eyes: “What if she thinks we don’t care if we never say anything.”

Kakashi narrowed his eyes: “Pressuring people is definitely not the right way to go, Obito.” His voice was louder than previously, he seemed agitated too. 

Sure, they were both on edge because clearly Rin was suffering and they did not know what to do.  He didn’t want to fight with Kakashi now in the middle of the night, especially not after Rin had just had a traumatic nightmare, but he couldn’t help the bees in his fingers. He wanted to say something so badly and no matter how seriously Kakashi stared at him, he still felt this way once Rin was back.

“Something up, Obito?” she asked as she climbed back into bed with him. “You look like there is something on your mind.” She took his hand.

It was criminal how well she knew him. He exchanged a look with the other man and Kakashi shook his head inaudibly. 

Obito let out a sharp breath. Stupid Kakashi. Stupid, stupid.

“Rin,” he said before Kakashi could cut in and stop him. “Have you ever thought about how it would be if a doctor would treat themselves?”

Rin seemed a little confused that this was the topic he wanted to talk about at 3.30 am on a hot summer night, but she nodded. “Yes it would probably be rather inefficient.” She looked over the shoulder at Kakashi who shrugged his shoulders as if he didn’t know what was going on.

“Why would that be?” Obito asked a little provocatively.

The girl blinked: “Well, an outside perspective has a completely different view on the situation. If you are too close to the case it could lead to misdiagnosis and maybe even no diagnosis at all. If the patient can tell himself with specific medical terminology why he isn’t sick he might delude himself into thinking he is healthy.”

Obito nodded. “Right, right.”

“Why are you asking that?” Rin pressed his hand.

“You know, it’s been on my mind lately. With all the missions and stuff I am so busy and I have no time to work on my mental recovery as much as I did when I was younger. Of course my mind tells me, well if only I was a medical ninja then I wouldn’t need recovery because I could just heal myself..”

Rin pressed his fingers harder: “That would be terrible. I’m glad it’s not the case.”

“Right,” Obito continued, cornering Rin like a trapped animal. “So you, in your professional opinion, think that sicknesses, if outward or mentally, should be treated by professionals, even if the patient itself is also a professional, right?”

Obito watched Rin repeat the sentence trying to piece together what he meant. “Yes, that’s right,” she said finally, still seeming confused why he had even started this conversation. Puzzled, she looked over at Kakashi again, who just shrugged his shoulders one more time. 

He found Kakashi’s eyes again and narrowed his as if to say “See, I didn’t break our agreement, but I didn’t just sit here and do nothing like you, stupid Kakashi”, which honestly was difficult to deliver with just a look and yet he believed Kakashi got the message loud and clear.

Rin, meanwhile, spaced out for the split of a second and then returned back to them. “Oh, that… that is what you meant,” she murmured and then lowered her head so Obito’s hand was touching her forehead.

For a moment Obito thought he had made her cry, but then he realised that she was just rubbing her forehead against his hand. 

“Thank you, Obito,” she whispered eventually. “I’ll heed your advice.”

As if they had practised to be synchronised both Kakashi and Obito leaned down at the same time and left a kiss in her hair.

[lucadrawss]

I genuinely feel bad for Yuma. Bro went through so much traumatising shit and had so much responsibility over peoples lives at only 13, he's a literal KID and was witnessing everyone around him die then blamed himself for it. There is no way he's not been permanently scarred mentally from everything that happened.

I wanna hug him so badly. (Why do most Zexal characters look so huggable?)

[superluigiglitchy]

i have three fuzzy meggy aus each with different flavours

triple dose Meggy

- gets the short end of the stick by the universe

- gets brainwashed, is turned into a zombie by a fucked up telephone then gets turned into a furry

- has the most mental faculties out of the three shockingly

- still meggy but 20% more traumatised

- scars mostly from metro and the from falling of the platform in the final fight in splatoon 2

- body horror central folks

- second tallest (tari height), moderate back aches but is manageable with pain killers

What if fuzz Meggy

- fucking died but is better now

- was stuck in the Grizz co labs for four years so kinda fucked up

- still somewhat Meggy but more cat like (Meggy's personality merged with the feline instincts from the fuzzy ooze in order to create a balance with in her psyche so she can return to being mentally present)

- was in a mindless feral state for the past 4 years until running into the NSS in Alterna and just started acting like a protective house cat

- shock collars scars on wrists, ankles and neck for tyung to escape so often (thanks grizz)

- large 3 claw mark on the left side of her face from a fuzzy octarian

- tallest of the bunch, much chronic pain from sudden growth spurt and rigor mortis, has to wear back brace to alleviate the pain along with arm and leg braces, takes pain killers often on a schedule to prevent potency lowering, still very much active in sports though

Fuzzy Martyr Meggy

- stepped in to help Paige against grizz and got fuzzy ooze on an open wound caused by mr. grizz when she took a hit for paige on accident and didnt tell anyone

- prevented the apocalypse but at the cost of her almost losing her humanity and becoming an animal slowly

- is doing better now but is still recovering mentally from almost losing herself to the wildness

- struggles controlling her feline instincts and often fights with herself

- has like 3 distinct personas now, shadow meggy, herself and the cat which came from the fuzzy ooze (its chill dw)

- tries to keep distance from everyone else but fails horribly because they refuse to leave her alone (found family all the way)

- sad wet kitty

- still pretty small but had a littke growth sourt so shes at least Mario's height now

[whumpshaped]

I would appreciate tips on how you write helle

ummmm thats a difficult one.... i cant write any oc when im not in the mood, but when im in the mood i kind of just get possessed and blank for the entirety for the writing-

the major characteristics that drive helle's actions in my head:

aloof. after 300 years, theyre honestly above most of the drama of mortality and human life, even if they pretend to be interested. they can never get properly emotionally invested (that changes some with beck). also they tell themself that emotional investment brings nothing but disappointment, despite being severely starved for some genuine connection

arrogant. after killing their sire and several other vampires and carving out a place for themself in vampire society, they kind of also feel invincible. it makes them kinda careless and bold, and also condescending

traumatised/abused. this manifests in several ways. they learned how to read the room (which they now use to purposely get under ppl's skin and know what buttons to push), they were left with permanent mental scars that make them particularly fragile sometimes (and getting triggered can cause some intense lashing out since they think theyre supposed to be 'over it'), nightmares, it made them a very good liar and actor etc.

also, while in the first 100 years of their immortality their clear goal was to get the fuck out and be free, now that theyre out its kind of been... a life without much purpose. they still dont know what they want exactly, which makes them a pretty in the moment guy. kind of impulsive. 'lets see what happens if i do this'. this, paired w the arrogance is a.... combination, for sure

thats all i can rly think of i hope that helps? im not sure if it does-