#in order to be able to experience the world i cannot be standing for very long i cannot be forced to walk for long periods of time

[ourceliumnetwork]

god. no one prepares you for the irritation and anger that comes when assistive devices and medical equipment actually fix your problems.

[marsprincess889]

VEDIC ASTRO OBSERVATIONS

Part 4

I thought, why not

Editing and finishing this as I have a face mask on

Bharanis are very sensitive, in a very misunderstood way. They're often either dangerously passive and stubborn or fiercely proactive, and this comes from the fact that they can read people well, and are sensitive to the energies around them. They know the importance of sticking to their own convictions/their way. Bharani is the place where you MUST NOT be fooled into submission and gaslighting, no matter who it comes from. It's where all kinds of forces try to enforce influence on you, right when you are so aware of your true calling/desire(s). That's why this nakshatra is so prominent in the charts of great philosophers and thinkers. They are defensive and secretive, but it all comes from the necessity to protect their truth, which is their life, and everything to them. Do not mistake their defensiveness as childish defiance. They know the pain of giving up and the strength it requires to stand up to themselves.

I said this multiple times, and I'm saying at again: ketu is VERY IMPORTANT. look at your ketu nakshatra and just take it in for a sec. Its infulence is on everything. Since you can rarely attribute that infulence on a specific thing in a person, it's often overlooked, but once you start looking at ketu in charts and apply it to the native/their life, you cannot unsee it. Also, when you are being natural, when life feels effortless and when you don't think a lot, oftentimes the appearance of your ketu will come to the surface, i mean, you'll be able to see it physically. Ik I don't look like my ketu nakshatra at first glance but boy do i see it when I look in the mirror, and I like it a lot. Oftentimes, as I've noticed, people love their ketu.

Your true essence, I think, is moon+ketu(very personal and mostly private but extremely important. They color the most of your inner world), then sun+ascendant(your way of dealing with the world, also very important) and atmakaraka+amatyakaraka(your path to yourself). Your chart ruler(ruling planet of your rising sign) is kind of separate but still visible, and it colors the whole chart, but unlike ketu, it's more on the surface and more visible in the native's behavior. I'm not saying you should disregard other placements, but this is how I see them.

Some nakshatras that I think are most prone to agitation/reactiveness(in order of their appearance from Ashwini to Revati, not ranked): Ardra, Ashlesha, Chitra, Vishakha, Purva Ashadha(?), Dhanishta.

In contrast, most stoic and hard to get a reaction out of: Pushya, Magha, Purva Phalguni, Uttara Phalguni, Uttara Ashadha, Shatabhisha, Uttara Bhadrapada.

Ketu in Ashlesha is dangerous like I know it personally(I don't have it tho). Ketu, unless exalted and/or developed by the native(conciously or subconciously) is mostly in a state of ignorance. Ashlesha is, dare I say, the most manipulative placement, but the tragedy is that Ashlesha natives kinda need it, that's what they know. It's the torturous place of attachments and distance and forced attachments and forced distance, of abuse and healing and alertness on a deeply nervous and emotional level. Ketu, the planet of raw, dangerously powerful stored energy and experience in a place like that can be horrible, for both the native and the people around them, especially if the native is unaware of their behavior.

Uttara Phalgunis can be taken for granted by others, especially people they're close to, but those people still refuse to let the U. Phalguni native go. They're so "Sunny" and supportive that some people refuse to take them seriously. The thing with Sun nakshatras though is that they have inner strength and are in no way naive, they just have trust because they trust themselves and know and are proud of their convictions. U. Phalgunis' convictions almost always include support and loyalty to people close to them/dear to their heart, but unfortunately, not everyone can appreciate that for what it is and pass it off as naivety. Mostly it comes from people who value manipulation, which Uttara Phalgunis hate. Uttara Phalguni women/girls especially can be seen as "good girls" at first glance, or as "vanilla", but in reality, it's based on their inner strength and trust in themselves. Ik this sounds biased, that's just because it's personal and I know many examples of it, mine and others. This one's for the "good" ones.

Interesting thing I've noticed: Krittikas, despite being a Sun nakshatra, have a reputation of being "aggressive"? I would not say they're aggressive, but they can be more reactive than other sun nakshatras. Krittika starts in Aries(ram), which is ruled by the active Mars. It's yoni animal is a sheep/goat/ram(sources vary). I mean, its essence is that of fire, and its meaning is "to cut", so, they're kind of aggressive about their individuality/selectivity/. They're aggressively stoic, if that makes sense.

To expand on the point above, a great way to understand nakshatras is to view their ruling planet as what is given/what we have, and the rashi(s) that it's in as what is done with it. So, for example, if Bharani is about protecting/defending(mars/aries) beauty, life and love(Venus), Mrigashira(the Taurus part) is about beautifying/enjoying(passive venus/taurus) pursuit/defiance(Mars). You can see how different those are, especially because a planet ruling a rashi is not the same as a planet ruling a nakshatra, they manifest slightly differently.

Another great way to understand nakshatras is to learn their mythology. I am very well aware that different sources say different things, and ik it's more tiring than rewarding to go from site to site but you can take little details that are consistent and stick to them. For example, Revati's god Pushan is known as the one who guides, who nourishes, but he's the nourishing form of a Sun god. So now you see that Revati is solar in nature, rather than Saturnian(its opposite). It's all about association and how different associations relate to each other. I think this kind of approach is better than relying on other people's opinions and observations.

So, this is all I guess?

Interact pleaseeeeeeeeee 😩💕 esp reblog and comment

[the-daily-dreamer]

The thing about the breakdown of the Rhaenicent relationship that is talked about but I think is still severely overlooked is the key role that both girls/women (specifically Rhaenyra) play in its destruction.

Because the fandom focuses in on this narrative that the relationship broke down solely because of the ambitions of men. And aside from that fueling the annoying idea that all women are inherently passive victims that suffer because men are ambitious and violent, it’s simply wrong.

While the catalyst was certainly Otto’s ambition and Viserys’s weakness (and perversion), Rhaenyra and Alicent’s relationship truly breaks down because of Rhaenyra’s entitlement, self-serving nature, and inability to see outside of herself and her experiences and Alicent’s (in my opinion reasonable) reactions toward this over time.

The beginning of the break down comes from Otto forcing Alicent to comfort the king and Viserys knowing his desire for her is wrong and forcing her to keep quiet about their visits until he decides to marry her without her prior knowledge or consent. And Rhaenyra (and the fandom) sees this as the ultimate betray against her by Alicent. Rhaenyra holds more resentment against Alicent for the engagement than she does against her father. Why is this? Some might say that it’s because she’s closer with Alicent and therefore would expect more from her than her father (whose relationship with her has been broken by the murder death of her mother). But I don’t think that’s fully the case.

While Rhaenyra having a higher expectation of Alicent may be a reason for her increased and unequal resentment, I think the main reason is that Rhaenyra cannot fathom Alicent could do this because she has never been in this position. Rhaenyra sees this as Alicent being complicit in the deceit and seduction because Rhaenyra would simply rebel. She can’t understand why Alicent wouldn’t simply say “no” to her father or betray the king for her. Rhaenyra’s world view is very blinded by her privilege. She simply thinks Alicent should and could defy her own father because…Rhaenyra has and will again. Rhaenyra is able to disobey her father and get away with it so why can’t Alicent? Ignoring the fact that a crown princess has vastly more power than the daughter of the hand, Viserys is a weak and compliant parent compared to Otto’s manipulative and stern nature. It’s easy for Rhaenyra to disobey because the consequences are either nonexistent or very mild. Alicent doesn’t have this luxury and privilege but Rhaenyra can’t conceive of it.

But also, Rhaenyra sees her father as…her dad. Not the king. Rhaenyra sees it as easy to defy him and his orders because he is her father first and her king second. But for Alicent that is the king. The most powerful man in the world. Defying him could have disastrous consequences for her and her father. But because Rhaenyra doesn’t force herself to see things from another’s perspective, she doesn’t see it as Alicent being beholden to the man who could (if he wanted to) ruin her family or kill her and her father but rather her friend not betraying her dad.

After this we see Alicent be the one to continuously try to extend an olive branch and support Rhaenyra behind the scenes. Asking for Rhaenyra to have the option to choose who she marries (a privilege and kindness Alicent, herself, and every other woman in this universe hasn’t had). Reaffirming Rhaenyra as the right choice for heir when Viserys is questioning his decisions. Defending Rhaenyra against rumors that would damage her reputation. And all Alicent gets in return is snark, anger, and lies (leading to Alicent’s isolation and suffering in court).

Which leads to event two that breaks the relationship: Rhaenyra’s entitled behavior and lying. Alicent spends a great deal of her time coinciding her husband in favor of Rhaenyra. But Rhaenyra, seeing herself as exceptional and above the rules, continuously acts out in ways that hurt her standing. Most especially with her decision to go out and try to sleep with daemon and then pushing Criston to sleep with her.

Alicent is the one to be transparent with Rhaenyra about the “rumor” to get her side. Something Viserys would simply not care enough to do. Rhaenyra, knowing her actions being confirmed would be disastrous, tells half truths to Alicent who is all too eager to believe and support her friend. Even worse, she uses the memory of her mother, something she knows Alicent holds incredibly sacred, to further convince Alicent that she’s telling the truth. And this decision by Rhaenyra to lie (over something she knows Alicent holds dear and has used multiple times to try to connect with her) to protect herself directly harms Alicent as her father and only ally in court is kicked out and ostracized. But that’s not Rhaenyra’s concern. While Alicent has given a lot of effort to protect and defend Rhaenyra, Rhaenyra is far too focused on her on wishes and desires to care about the impacts her choices have on anyone else.

And that’s why when Alicent finds out that it was a lie, a lie that got her father taken away from her, she goes full scorched earth and wears the green dress. Because she realizes that Rhaenyra will never stop being entitled and self-serving. She realizes that all this time and effort she has put into fixing things with Rhaenyra and defending her is completely one sided. Because Rhaenyra can only see things from her perspective and can only see things based on how she can benefit even to the detriment of others (herself, her father, Criston, etc.).

Then the final nail in the coffin is the birthing of bastards. At this point Alicent has had her eyes opened to how Rhaenyra will do as she pleases without considering the consequences (to herself and others) and then she watches Rhaenyra flagrantly birth obvious bastard after obvious bastard, pushing the children she was forced to have further and further down the line of succession behind kids who objectively should not have the throne. And it makes her bitter and jealous and as she should be. The fandom is too obsessed with marking Alicent as the reason the relationship was destroyed because she was unnecessarily jealous of poor Rhaenyra who was just so brave to do as she pleased!

But it’s a spit in the face to Alicent. That Alicent was pimped out and forced the have children with a man she didn’t love at the ripe old age of 15 hole Rhaenyra is free to take a lover and birth obvious bastards and get away with it. She has every right to be angry. Not because she thinks all women should be submissive and bend to patriarchy. Because she is watching how privileged Rhaenyra is before her very eyes while she was forced to suffer the way almost every other woman has.

While I acknowledge that Viserys and Otto are the catalyst for the breakdown of Rhaenyra and Alicent’s relationship. Rhaenyra’s flagrant disregard for others and her entitlement are what truly break the relationship until Alicent is no longer willing to be submissive and accepting of Rhaenyra’s behavior. And this in turn, causes her to make choices that service her and her children. The way Rhaenyra has always done and always will.

The breakdown of rhaenicent was always inevitable regardless of which men were involved. Because at their core, Rhaenyra would always put herself first and Alicent would always come to the realization she is no longer willing to be a doormat.

[inpursuitofadreamer]

WTF is up with Tanakamigi Chui

and why doesn’t he have a route?

spoilers for pretty much the whole game, but especially Kisa’s, Kisa’s bad ending, Kai’s, Mitsuki’s, and Neji’s routes.

As I got further in the game, I started to wonder why so many people in Jack Jeanne wished to keep Chui and Kisa apart. Separate from the common route’s general assertion that Kisa is an integral part of Quartz, and dismissing the true reason Chuza invites Kisa to Univeil revealed in her route. The 3rd year Quartz students in particular has a sense of apprehension about Chui and Kisa, but it was intangible, it felt a bit overprotective, until certain key points even outside of the bad ending.

The moment where Chuza tells Kisa, during a weekend hangout scene with him during her route, that she should be careful because she and Chui may be ‘drawn to each other’, I thought my hunch was right, and started to pay much closer attention to Chui as I replayed each route again.

Chui is asked to explain his attraction to Kisa several times, but the one that stood out to me the most is within Mitsuki’s route. What he is looking for, what he sees in Kisa, and how she is confirming she is who he needs.

He says some variation of this in every route:

The winter performance. What you sacrificed to stand on the Univeil stage was of the greatest value of all. It was far more important than life itself, putting yourself as close to death as possible. You know what I’m talking about. You sacrificed your right to remain on Univeil’s stage in order to continue to do so.

But in Mitsuki’s route he continues:

Your very breath on that stage made my soul tremble with glee… You are to live for me, just as I thought. You are the only one who can play Takihime in “I am Death”.

You have what I want more than anything in the world.

But here is the moment things come together. Where the game pays off something being set up entire common route, a chilling moment of ‘oh shit, he knows,’ in the best and worst ways possible. This moment recontextualizes the rest of the game.

Your body knows well that you can rise beyond all others simply by taking my hand. You know yourself. Your body is able to sense my very presence. You notice even a single glance from me. You cannot take your eyes off me when I stand before you.

I have seen them described as ‘soulmate-coded’. It does feel that way, with the understanding that this isn’t a good thing. The worst kind of soulmates who will destroy each other. This is what I think 3Q senses when they realize they need to keep Chui and Kisa apart.

In Kai’s route in particular, we see where Chui would lead her when he tells Kisa to play Takihime. He sees the darkness she hides behind her eyes that Fumi and Kai sense in Fumi’s route and identifies it correctly as grief. When Kisa pulls it to the surface and places it in Takihime’s hands, we listen to Chui breathe her in as her voice trembles and wavers over a prayer. It triggers something in both of them, Kisa loses her sense of self trying to face her brother, and Chui loses his motivation to perform “I am Death” after having momentarily experienced the connection he’d longed for. It is only when Kisa and Chui turn away from each other that they gain themselves back.

As an aside, wow is Yuka Terasaki’s performance in Jack Jeanne spectacular or what?! When I did Chui’s bad end, I was really hoping we’d get the full “I am Death” with Kisa as Takihime. I wanted to experience the whole of the performance, juxtaposing Chui’s deep, haunting moans with Kisa’s heartbroken cries. Couldn’t we at least get a CG with that scene in Kai’s route? The way I was so disappointed!

It is even more poignant, then, when Amber goes to Univeil theatre to practice in Mitsuki’s route, to find Mitsuki singing to Kisa. Chui notes that she didn’t notice him with a hint of loneliness. His response to Mitsuki and Kisa’s partnership in this moment, after hushing Kamiya for Kisa’s benefit… it hits a bit harder when you think of the moment he finds what he’s sought in Kai’s route and has to leave it behind.

Neji watches Chui’s “I am Death” backstage with Kisa in his route, being the only one who seems to look at this 17yr old as the human he is, and feels conflicted. It was Neji’s script and direction that set Chui on this path, regardless of having relinquished his responsibilities by moving to Quartz. Even so, Neji is a child too, possibly not even 18 himself or about to turn 19, but he still holds on to a sense of guilt for essentially abandoning Chui. Neji is likely the one person who actually cares about Chui the person, having in various routes commented on Chui’s solitude and lonliness, his pure love of theatre, his desire to perform with someone who is as talented and passionate about the stage as he is.

Knowing all this, Neji still tells Kisa, ‘I can’t give you to him.’

It’s framed as a soft, romantic moment where Neji once again shows Kisa the vulnerability he tries to hide with jokes and silly voices, while again hardening his resolve to protect her. But Neji shows he isn’t doing it only for her, as he explains what he wishes he could offer to Chui and how, in the current circumstances, he can only ‘show Chui his limits.’ The best thing Neji can do for Chui in this moment is to show him the importance of connection through example. Interesting, because the connection Neji has with Kisa was prompted by Chui going out of his way to push Kisa to not abandon Neji, when Chui himself is rejecting all connection being offered to him.

From Kisa’s route, the important 1/31 event:

Kisa: Why do you go so far to be alone? Tanakamigi, you look like… you’re in pain.

Kisa: Can’t you let yourself accept other people’s help sometimes?

Chui: …the stage would be soiled. Then no one would be able to witness the perfection of my many talents.

Chui: Standing on the stage is proof of my existence.

Later Kisa tells Neji that she saw Chui rehearsing.

Kisa: I felt a sense of dread while watching him. Like watching someone with an unimaginable burden…

Neji has a deep, innate understanding of what Chui seeks, it is a desire they share - something Chui has mentioned multiple times but doesn’t elaborate on. They almost speak in code, Neji is the only one who understands what the hell Chui is talking about when he keeps calling Kisa ‘the transparent vessel’. They talk about talent in the same way, as if it is all they are and the value of their existence is determined by it. Their sense of self worth is their talents itself, their determination of other’s value is based on the ruler they measure themselves by, creating a wall that prevents them from gaining what they desire most.

The move to Quartz is what essentially saves Neji, getting him out of an environment where the people around him only care about him because of his talent. It is noted several times that Neji works his ass off, but he is often spoken about in terms of talent instead of hard work - Mitsuki says it outright at one point: it is talent + hard work that = genius but people only talk about ‘talent’. Fumi and Kai both tell Kisa Neji has a hard time communicating, he doesn’t know what to say and when to say it, or what not to say, and he doesn’t attempt to make himself understood. Instead they call Neji a ‘genius and a talent’, further isolating him. By the members of Quartz humanizing him during their second year and throughout the common route, challenging him over and over until he learns to consider people as people (i.e. during the summer performance prep), and further befriending Kisa, Neji comes to the exact opposite conclusion as Chui.

Neji and Chui become mirror images in his route, which sets up Chui’s behavior and obsession in Kisa’s route. It would be harder to understand Chui’s madness and motivations without Neji’s extremes. Both of them are willing to rend flesh and spill blood for the stage, but so is Kisa.

Neji: Your ingenious eyes are constantly moving for the stage and for Quartz more than I expected! Should the stage be amiss, you are willing to spare your very flesh and blood!

Neji: You have what it takes to become one with Chui. Your affection and feelings towards Univeil’s performances is eerily clear and beautiful… Chui can elevate himself to a high dimension with someone like you who can burn their life for the stage.

This is what we see happen in Kisa’s bad end and in Kai’s route when Kisa interacts with Chui. This is what 3Q is afraid of. Chui wants to sacrifice them both to the stage. In Kisa’s route he explains that he performs with the goal of proving his own existence. He is only living, breathing, if he is performing. In Kisa we find the ‘soulmate’ who does the same.

To some extent Chui learns the same thing in each route, but in particular Neji’s, Kai’s and Kisa’s routes: the relationship between partners must be reciprocal.

That’s why Neji’s wishes for Kisa and attempting to keep Kisa and Chui apart makes even more sense in her own route, where Chui starts to lose his mind, saying he will take Amber’s blood and pour it into the vessel that is Kisa.

Neji: But I don’t want you to become one with someone else. I want you to be transparent forever without a blemish of color from others.

It would still be incredible to see the legendary performance of “I am Death” that only Kisa and Chui would be able to perform. It would be extremely interesting to see Kisa’s first year at Univeil as if she was placed in Amber. There is nothing more satisfying when Chui slaughters Kamiya and Momonashi over the ‘filth’ they spew anytime they catch sight of a Quartz student, after all, imagining Kisa starting in Amber with these two honed talents and her with no experience at all, but skyrocketing to stardom alongside Chui would satisfy the petty bones in my body. ‘Villian’ routes in otome are pretty common but I rarely find them satisfying, but I do think a Chui route would be great even though in the context of current Jack Jeanne’s Univeil it would be tragic.

But most of all, I would love to see Chui alongside the other 77th year students as 3rd years, taking care of his kids in Amber, and growing a healthy friendship with Minorikawa, Mitsuki, and Sugachi. Considering the reveal of his circumstances in Kisa’s route, I think he deserves that sort of peace.

[jokertrap-ran]

[Yume100 x Kuroshitsuji Memory Piece] 5★ 夢世界の冬: Winter in the Land of Dreams Translation

The Princes of the Country of Four Seasons invite Sebastian and Ciel to a special tea ceremony in Hourai. As time passes peacefully… What are Ciel’s thoughts on the matter as Oka, Hikage, Kaede, and Toya share their daily life experiences as well as their thoughts on the Princess of Traumere?

*Spoiler free: Translations will remain under cut

In the Country of Four Seasons, Hourai.

Bright, warm, sunlight shines down upon the lands, almost as if celebrating the disappearance of the Reanimated Corpses.

Oka: Earl Ciel Phantomhive. I humbly thank you again for saving this Country. I cannot bear to imagine what would've happened if it weren't for your timely intervention.

Toya: We offer you our sincerest thanks. This is but a small token of our appreciation that we've managed to put together on such short notice.

Ciel was going to be heading to the Country of Koubai tomorrow in pursuit of the Reanimated Corpses.

Ciel: No need to thank me. That monster was something that came from my world in the first place.   Ciel: Hence, there was no need to hold this event either.

The mystery of the Reanimated Corpses and a promising lead on how to get home…

Ciel thought that perhaps he could glean some tidbits of useful information by participating in a tea ceremony attended by the influential members of the royal families.

Hikage: It's so warm today that you'd never guess that it's the middle of winter right now! Heck, a swim sounds good!

Kaede: Don't be daft. Although… I suppose idiots can't catch colds.

Hikage: Come again!?   Oka: Both of you! You're before our guests right now! Besides, you should refrain from doing things that bring a smile to Toya’s face…

Toya: Heh, I can't believe you're chiding them again.

The princes’ peaceful day was unfolding before Ciel’s very eyes.

Sebastian: Your tea, Young Master.

Sabastian skillfully slides another cup of tea before the young Earl.

The pleasant aroma of Horai’s renowned high-quality tea wafted in the air, but Ciel's expression remained as sullen as ever.

Hikage: But, man! Your butler’s on a whole other level! What was his name again? Sebastian? 

Hikage: He's crazy strong, and the tea he brews is a delight on the taste buds!

Kadae: Even my attendant was surprised, and wondered just how he managed to make tea taste so good.

Sebastian: I'm humbled to hear that.

Oka: I feel a tad ashamed as the host since my skills pale in comparison to his…

Ciel: Don't take it to heart. He's my butler, and he's simply following orders.

Ciel: …Looks like we've come up empty.

Toya: Is something the matter?

Ciel: No, everything's fine.

Time passed peacefully for a while before Ciel sighed again.

Hikage: Say, is (Y/n) reaching anytime soon?

Oka: One of my attendants informed me earlier that she was having some trouble getting dressed in her kimono.

Kaede: I see. I can already imagine her running around in a panic.

Oka: Hehe, well that certainly does sound like something she'd do.

Toya: Yup. The incident with the Reanimated Corpses was a terrible disaster, but… I'm glad we got to meet her.

Ciel: …

Ciel was still unable to comprehend just how this girl was the one standing at the crux of this world.

An average Jane who was nothing like a princess…  He wouldn't have believed it either if he hadn't witnessed her mysterious powers first-hand.

Ciel: All of you seem to hold the Princess of Traumere in high regard.

Hikage: High regard? Well… I guess. She's amazing!

Ciel: …?

Hikage: No, I mean — (Y/n) usually prioritizes the needs of others over her own all the time!

Oka: Indeed. More often than not, she's the one who ends up getting hurt due to how much she sympathizes with others.

Kaede: You'll never be able to guess just by looking at her, though…

Toya: She was really worried for me back when I was unable to smile…

Oka: That being said, she never fails to show us just how important kindness is.

Hikage: That's right! And that's why everyone smiles whenever they see her!

Ciel: …

Now, Ciel had moved on from his initial astonishment as sparks of irritation began to flicker into life within his heart.

Ciel: No one would ever put themselves out there like that.

People only used others as stepping stones, just like how Ciel was trying to use the Princes for his own gains.

Ciel: No matter how you try to gloss it over with pretty words or looks alike, ultimately, everyone only does things to serve their personal benefits…

Ciel: That's just how people are…

Sebastian: …

Sebastian watched the scene unfold before him with a small smile playing on his lips 

However, the tense atmosphere only lasted a little more than a split second…

Hikage: Yeah, and that's why she's so amazing.

Hikage’s clear voice cuts through the tension, allowing the peaceful atmosphere to trickle in once more.

Ciel: Huh?

Hikage: Because that's just how she is! It's fun to be around her, and she's always there to lend a helping hand if anything does happen!

Oka: Heh, I'm of the same mind as well.

Kaede: She does say it with such innocence after all — how she loves the smiles on the faces of others around her…

Toya: But the same can be said for us too… We want her to keep smiling, always.

Ciel: Like I said, people like that-

Hikage: Rather than that- Hey, Ciel!

Hikage: Why don't we go for a walk? This place boasts some breathtaking scenery! You should take some time to enjoy it since you've come all the way here!

Unable to retort to that and feeling slightly drained, Ciel could only back down.

Ciel: …Sebastian. It's winter now, isn't it?

Sebastian: Yes. It is currently winter in this world and in this country right now.

Ciel: I see … It seems like their world is truly on a different level compared to ours.

Ciel: Hence why their winters are so warm.

Looking at the gentle rays of the sun that trickled down from the heavens, Ciel closed his eyes, smiling ever so slightly.

The END

[eldritch-elrics]

one of the most interesting things about the silent hill 2 remake to me is the sort of... cascading effect that its particular brand of realism has on the entire experience, especially when it comes to james's characterization.

i'll try to explain concisely what i mean.

both 2001's SH2 and 2024's SH2 have what you could call a realistic artstyle. between the two games, this is achieved in very different ways. the original game uses realistic textures, proportions, animations, and especially lighting. this is what gives the fmv cutscenes their uncanny feel - the low resolution means that we focus not on the details, but whether the overall shape and lighting of the scenes feels consistent with reality.

the 2024 remake, meanwhile, follows in the tradition of recent AAA releases by upping the detail. silent hill, as a location, feels more real than ever. now, you can debate about what this does or doesn't add to the game - is an important part of the character of silent hill the eerie, empty, and unreal atmosphere it gains from the limitations of the ps2? that's a valid question. but being a 2024 AAA release, and one that clearly has a lot of effort put into it, the remake goes for realism by adding a whole lot of stuff.

now you have a game that is full of stuff. objects. clutter. this creates a problem. in the original silent hill games, important objects are not indicated with any kind of ui. instead, they're highlighted with particular colors, textures, lighting, etc. the remake does this too - but it also adds a little nondiegetic indicator when you're standing next to something you can interact with:

for a game with this artstyle, this is 100% a necessity. sure, some objects (especially stuff with uniform designs, like ammo or health items) stand out regardless. but for other things... it just isn't always clear!

imagine the game without these indicators. you would probably be able to find most of the important objects. but you'd need to spend way, way more time searching through rooms full of clutter in order to pick out the stuff that's necessary to progress. this is how the original game works! and it works in that game because the levels are smaller, and there is less random crap. but it would just be so tedious to do in the remake.

adding an interaction indicator doesn't so much create a clear boundary between "important" and "not important" - plenty of the stuff you can interact with in the remake is random stuff like posters that add nothing but worldbuilding detail, or drawers that don't actually contain anything - but it does create a clear boundary between "things the developers meant for you to focus on" and "things the developers meant as background details." this cannot help but change the entire experience of the game. in the original game, anything has the potential to be interacted with - you don't know whether you can or not until you've walked up to it (and made sure you've walked up to it at the right angle...) and pressed the button. this makes you consider your surroundings in a different way! it makes you search differently! it makes you more aware! it also adds more mystery - it makes the world feel that much more complicated, because there is so much stuff you could be missing!

one detail of the original game that i was very sad not to see in the remake is the abundance of commentary that james has on a bunch of the objects around him. and they could have added at least some of this! just a couple dozen more voice lines! but a lot of it is, well:

it is usually not particularly profound commentary. but it encompasses far more than the sorts of things to which the remake adds an interaction indicator, and i assume that is at least one reason (apart from its general characterization of james as taciturn) why the remake does away with it entirely. because there is such a black and white distinction between "interactable" and "non-interactable," they can't justify adding that little symbol to every potentially interesting thing in a game full of interesting clutter. why would gamers want to be told to focus on something, only for james to tell them right back that it's not worthy of his focus?

now, these objects things may not be important or noteworthy. but what makes them interesting - and what makes me as a player want to interact with every possible thing i can, just so see if it has associated dialogue - is that james tells you that they aren't important or noteworthy, and this tells us a lot about james. it makes us feel like we're seeing the game through his eyes, not the eyes of the developers who are putting in the buttons telling us what to focus on. instead, james is deciding what is "not a particularly special photograph," what is "...just a regular stage," and what is a collection of bottles so mesmerizing that he feels compelled to expatiate on his alcohol problems.*

*this is a particularly interesting example, because it's a completely missable detail from the original game that, as far as i'm aware, isn't in the remake's version of heaven's night. and yet... the remake references it! the scene in the remake where james refuses to drink the glass maria offers him in heaven's night reads completely differently whether you know this detail or not!

it's also possible that the lack of random commentary from james - the more substantial stuff, that is, not just "i don't need toilet paper right now" - is a deliberate choice on the part of the remake dev team to get rid of something that they saw as only in the game because the design decisions of the original silent hill games necessitated it. maybe they thought that the only reason for james to have that much commentary at all was because the game needed to give players feedback as a little reward for exploring around - a type of exploring that the remake does not incentivize. maybe they thought that a more "true" version of james would not say anything at all when faced with an object he had no strong feelings about. (especially as opposed to a protagonist like heather, for whose characterization this object-commentary is vital.)

but the thing is... even the presence of the less substantial commentary adds substance to james's characterization! it tells us what he's interested in, what motivates him or doesn't, what reminds him he needs to get a move on (shows us his one track mind - his drive towards his quest!), and what he's noticing but deliberately not thinking about (for example, sexually charged imagery). and it's so interesting that, very likely, this design decision is in part a consequence of an entirely different decision that was made because "that just how AAA games are" !

so, in short, the cascading effect is:

realism -> more detail -> harder to see what objects are important so devs need to add ui elements to point out what you can interact with -> you're not going around and interacting with everything you see -> james doesn't do random commentary on unimportant stuff -> changes how his characterization feels

[drdemonprince]

something im kind of connecting the dots to re: your posts about shaming people who don’t wear masks…in ‘20 and ‘21 I spent a lot of time posting shaming instagram stories telling people they needed to mask, and i yelled at family until i was blue in the face bc they weren’t masking, having big weddings, etc. and it really created a rift (obviously) in my relationships. I’ve also spent a lot of time and energy in the past 4 or so years telling people that it’s not possible to be an ally to trans people if they still engage in any media created by jk rowling. Especially given that her anti trans manifesto has been cited in anti trans legislation in the uk, she says that she assumes that anyone who continues to engage with Harry Potter media approves of her transphobia, etc the list goes on. And yet i still see my friends going to the wizarding world of Harry Potter, marathoning the movies with their friends, going to see the new movies in theaters, and so on. Obviously my aggressive shaming posts and conversations (which have alienated a lot of people) aren’t doing jack shit. Your mask shame posts made me realize that it probably wasn’t right of me to do that. But I don’t see how I can stand up for what I believe in and show people that it’s not okay to keep doing this shit AND play nice and not create trouble. Do you have any thoughts?

Thanks for this great question and for sharing your experiences.

I think when we shame, part of it is a grappling with our own powerlessness. It feels terrible to confront that no matter how much we care, and no matter how much we plead, we cannot make another person take action. When people we love or rely on won't hear our pleas and won't take action, it wounds us so deeply, and it makes sense we react in anger or seek to shame them hoping it will make them care. But it isn't effective.

I think one of the first steps is accepting our powerlessness as individuals. We have to stop expecting ourselves to somehow persuade people to change their behavior and views, when all the research indicates that such change is rare, slow, and very hard, and cannot be accomplished on a person who does not already want to be influenced. We have to sit in the humility of not being able to make others care, and take time to grieve how badly it hurts. Our understandable and huge hurt feelings need to be processed. many of us have a powerful need to express our rage and have it witnessed by others who understand.

From there, we have to think very strategically about what kind of collective work we can do that will shift social norms, facilitate the behavior we want to see, and fight for systemic changes that will actually address the root issues.

This may be things like passing out masks at protests. Joining a local mutual aid fund to contribute to the expenses of people who are quarantining. Protesting an event space to make them institute a masking policy. Unionizing with our coworkers to demand paid sick leave. Shoplifting tests and redistributing them to people in need. Terrorizing the business leaders who dragged us all back into the office. Sharing the wastewater data. Asking loved ones about their COVID mitigation decisions in a sincere way. Organizing outdoor events for our communities. Paying for a buddy's vaccine.

There are countless ways for us to be plugged into an active community that is larger than us. The work is humble, and ongoing, and what you do personally will never be enough on its own, and you must accept that in order to believe that it does not have to be. We are in this together.

In short, I think the tough emotional realities of feeling disrespected and not cared for much be addressed by finding community with people who do care and will give us room to voice our outrage. And then we have to work together to create the circumstances that allow real systemic change to germinate.

Right now, people conflate that emotional need to express rage with the political need to take action. And what feels cathartic to do or say is not necessarily what's persuasive. There has to be room for both.

[legionnaireslover]

New Interview with BC in The Times!

Stephen Armstrong

Sunday May 19 2024, 12.01am BST, The Sunday Times

When did Benedict Cumberbatch go from aspiring actor to a star with the world at his feet? For some it was Sherlock, which started in 2010 and won him an ardent following of “Cumberbitches”. For others it was his Marvel films, including Doctor Strange, which was when the money started to roll in. But for his father, also an actor, it was a play his son did while at Manchester University.

“After Dad saw me in Amadeus at university, he put his arm around me and said, ‘You’re better at this than I ever was. I cannot wait to support your career. I’m so proud of you,’” Cumberbatch tells me. There’s a pause as he gathers himself, touched by the memory. “For a man to say that to his son is absolutely huge.” He grins. “And it’s not necessarily true … But the generosity to go, ‘Your turn now.’”

In previous interviews, for Sherlock and his Sky drama Patrick Melrose, I found Cumberbatch chatty, amusing and curious. Today, wearing a T-shirt, grey hoodie and cream cords, he is in a more sombre mood. He is prone to embarking on long trains of thought that sound as if he’s debating his answer as he delivers it. Perhaps it’s because he’s very tired, he says. When we last met, in 2018, his second son was barely a year old. Now he is a 47-year-old father of three boys, aged eight to four, with his wife, the theatre and opera director Sophie Hunter.

In his new television series, Eric, he plays Vincent, a dad in 1980s New York who loses his son, aged nine, near a dodgy disco with a history of child prostitution. He wasn’t sure about taking the job at first — filming was in Budapest and he worried about time away from his family, but he found the script compelling so flew back and forth.

Lucy Forbes, the director of Eric, says Cumberbatch drew on his own experience of fatherhood for the role. “We were filming a scene where he’s standing outside the school, he’s been drinking, and a single tear falls from his eye,” she says. “Five minutes before that he’d been kicking a football around. He stepped on set and wept. I said, ‘How did you manage that?’ He said, ‘Because I have three boys.’”

I relay this to Cumberbatch and he stirs uneasily. “I think drama can teach you an awful lot about yourself. If they knew where my mind was going in that scene, good luck, because even I don’t know. And I don’t need to play a bad father to realise my shortcomings as a dad.” He gives a brief laugh and shrugs. “I can’t escape myself completely. There’s always going to be elements of me at play.”

This may be why he loved the puppet work he had to do in Eric. His character is a puppeteer who runs a Sesame Street-style show called Good Morning Sunshine and Cumberbatch performs song and dance numbers with the aid of a marionette (he can sing well). “Puppets are like masks, they say the things that we can’t,” he explains. “They’re like jesters in a medieval court able to expose truths, lies, hypocrisies and idiocies. And they can risk things that we can’t.”

Cumberbatch is guarded about his family — “and this is where we come to my privacy”, he says to deflect any questions about his personal life. It’s something he has been careful about since becoming a father, and with good reason. He has been the subject of intense attention since he broke through as Sherlock Holmes — the former chef Jack Bissell was given a three-year restraining order in 2023 after he attacked and vandalised the Cumberbatch home while the family were inside.

Stephen Moffat, the co-creator of Sherlock, says Cumberbatch has always been conflicted about stardom and the attention that comes with it. “Stars need talent, appearance, the right role at the right age but also ambition,” Stephen Moffat, who was a writer on Sherlock, explains over the phone. “Benedict is not ruthless — but he wanted it. He was getting impatient. Everyone was saying he was the coming man in his mid-thirties. At the time we cast him, Martin Freeman was the show’s big name. And [Benedict] became a star in one night. He was on a motorcycle coming over to my house as the first episode went out and by the time he arrived he was a celebrity. Our phones were jumping off the table.”

Cumberbatch’s mid-thirties impatience was understandable. He’s from a family of actors — his father, Timothy Carlton, has a long career on stage and small screen while his mother, Wanda Ventham, converted early roles in Carry On films into regular comedy work in Minder and Only Fools and Horses. They played his parents in the third series of Sherlock.

Since Sherlock, however, his career has outstripped his parents’. He’s played Doctor Strange in six Marvel films, voiced Smaug and the Necromancer in three Hobbit movies, the Grinch in two and Shere Khan in Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle. He was never entirely of that blockbuster world, though, also playing Dominic Cummings in Brexit: The Uncivil War and Henry Sugar in Wes Anderson’s version of Roald Dahl’s story. As the superhero franchise world falters, his Eric performance delivers with the intensity of The Power of the Dog or Patrick Melrose, his 2018 drama about a posh Englishman struggling with addiction after his father abused him.

Eric is an emotional thriller written by the screenwriter and playwright Abi Morgan, whose previous work includes The Split and Suffragette. She was inspired by her time as a teenage nanny in New York and wrote it with just one actor in mind. “I thought [Cumberbatch] has got to be an asshole,” she says. “The surprise for me was that he genuinely wasn’t.” It co-stars Gaby Hoffmann (who played Adam’s sister Caroline in Girls), superb as Vincent’s increasingly estranged wife, and McKinley Belcher III as Detective Ledroit, a gay cop in a homophobic force investigating the boy’s disappearance.

The longer his son is missing, the more Vincent loses his hold on reality. He conjures up an imaginary giant puppet, Eric, to help him to find his son. Cumberbatch provides the voice for the beast and there’s rich, dark comedy in his battles with the plodding fluff monster, who trails him through the city offering dumb plans or mean critiques.

The New York we see is beset by problems, grappling with the Aids epidemic and widespread homelessness, which Cumberbatch got his teeth into.

“Mental health, homelessness, racism, sexism and a host of prejudices.” He ticks them off on his fingers. “We’re always told to arc away from that, or pivot is the term, I think, in PR talk. But drama should always have relevance, however sad.

“It has to speak to the world and have resonance. It doesn’t have to be worthy, but it has to be worthwhile.

“We may not have an Aids pandemic today, but we’ve had Covid, which created fear, it created isolation and created intolerance,” he points out, noting the battles over masks and vaccines. What’s unique to the here and now is the disconnect between us all as people welded to our phones, says Cumberbatch, who has said he subscribes to Buddhist philosophy. He sighs as he speaks about “the electric babysitter we carry around in our hands, which feeds a disconnect through the promise of connection. I mean, that’s a whole other conversation.”

Morgan based the show on her time as a teenage nanny in the city when New York looked just like it did in the movies — and the production captures that era’s look with precision. She wrote her story of “two little boys lost in the city” with just one actor in mind.

“We were pretty far down the line in terms of the scripts, and I knew Benedict had range,” she says. “He can do Doctor Strange, The Imitation Game, The Power of the Dog, Patrick Melrose. But I thought he has got to be an asshole, hasn’t he? The surprise for me is that he genuinely wasn’t. I suddenly understood why those actors get the big bucks they do because they get on stage or camera and there’s an alchemy.”

Cumberbatch has his pick of parts but says, “You gravitate towards things that mean something to you or the zeitgeist. It has to speak to the world and have resonance. It doesn’t have to be worthy, but it has to be worthwhile.”

He adds, “If there is a choice …” but he’s at that rare stage in an actor’s career where he can not only pick the roles he wants, but studios will wait for him. The Doctor Strange director Scott Derrickson recently revealed that Marvel postponed the movie’s release date from the profitable summer to the less bankable autumn to ensure they could cast Cumberbatch as the eponymous lead.

Eric shows Cumberbatch slowly collapsing from arrogant artist to hopeless bum in a grinding, catastrophic arc. He passes through so many states in the six episodes — does Vincent encompass themes from his entire career?

There’s the New York heroin addict of Melrose, homelessness as in Stuart: A Life Backwards (2007), where he plays a writer creating a memoir of a homeless alcoholic, and with the complex and unlikely solving of clues from a map scrawled on a wall, Vincent even resembles Sherlock Holmes.

“I see where you’re going,” he says. “But look, at one point I was the clever outsider scientist with problems communicating. The next, I was the know-it-all arrogant lead. Next, men wrestling with homosexuality, then posh people. Around the Oscar campaign for The Power of the Dog I was giving an interview at a film festival and somebody said, ‘You’ve played over a hundred characters on film alone.’ I was like, ‘Bloody hell!’ So there’s bound to be crossover.”

Many of his roles — including Vincent — are also troubled men with unsupportive parents, but he’s keen to stress his loving upbringing.

He muses for a moment and concludes: “I suppose that’s one of the best things about my career … I love that I make my parents proud.”

Eric is on Netflix from May 30

***********************

The Haters aren't going to like this one little bit. BC as a father and a husband (as well as many more things) is heavily featured in this article. There are DIRECT QUOTES from BC and the director of Eric referencing his sons.

It's a Haters' nightmare!

[getyourblisson]

A Look At March 2025

A Look At March 2025

March is a time where our mind is really clear.  It is easier to absorb information and to learn things.  We naturally have more of a drive to work on our own goals and things.  Others can be very inspiring for us during this time; and can be an example that it is possible to come through the challenges that life can put in our path.  These are the people that can serve as true mentors for us, and knows what it takes to create true successes in life.  Their wisdom comes from real life experiences, and not just information that they are repeating because it is a good concept.

This is a time where we must be careful about following people strictly because they are noted or well publicized.  Most of those with big names (although not all) have been promoted there through money; and because they have aligned with those that work against God or Divine Source in our world.  They are in it for the money and not to truly help people; or, because they have actual wisdom from experiences.  They often flaunt titles and credentials; many of which have been bought or they have not had to do anything for.  Remember, that most true teachers or mentors are not out there with flashing signs.  Many of them, are not that well known; and instead, are always a bit hidden.  They do not chase you, and they do not abandon you when you run out of funds to pay them.  These false prophets use fear tactics to control you; such as, you have a bad curse or illness and I will remove it from you for a certain fee.  However, they cannot clear it out as it is tougher than they first thought; so, they need more and more money from you.  Or, they try to make you feel that you are “privileged” and one of a select few able to advance; but the reality is anyone that pays get to advance.

Power battles are evident right now.  False prophets and gurus are battling us for our money.  People battle to have control over us.  There may be big battles for freedom and the right to live freely and self-sufficient outside of the system.  When people do not submit to being controlled, then those who want to control seek to remove their rights to live freely.  This is the path of a dictator; and it is likely that we will see them exposed during this time.  Even if we do not fully agree with someone, we may still find it important to support them; since without them, we lose our right to have a different opinion at all.

We could see those with dictator styles of leading and influence having to step down.  People are ready to show them how strong they can be without them and outside of the system.  It is important for people to remember this; and when they do, they will unfold true aspects of prosperity.  This is a time where discernment is necessary to tell who is truly for the people and their well-being; and who only says that in order to get more control.  The people may call for and insist on resignations or removal of those that are shown to be supporting global agendas that end up hurting people, animals, and the Planet; especially if it is demonizing regular people and being in the name of saving the planet.  Whistleblowers are likely to come forward at this time.  Or, those close to those in power may make mistakes that expose them.

This is a time for us to strengthen our own skills and ability to stand on our own.  It is about taking our power back, and removing our dependence on others for our basic needs as much as possible.  We do not have to become a recluse and avoid people; but we do benefit when we are not dependent on them.  It is better to be with people, or support them by choice and without attachments; than to be forced into supporting people that care nothing about us, and may even be seeking our harm.  Those who want us dependent on them are not interested in helping us, they are interested in controlling us.

I welcome you to allow others to inspire you; but still seek to have your own experiences and create your own successes.  What if true wisdom comes from real life experiences?

I welcome you to remember that true teachers and mentors do not have to flaunt titles and credentials or carry “flashing signs” to get your attention.  What if some of the strongest mentors and teachers are not that well known and are often hidden a bit?

I welcome you to pay attention to how and where people are trying to get control over you.  What if these are the people that want to remove your rights when they cannot control you?

I welcome you to pay attention to who is truly for your well-being; and who only says that to get more control over you.  What if those who are supporting global agendas over people will demonize regular people in the name of saving the planet?

I welcome you to strengthen your own skills and ability to stand strong on your own.  What if this allows you to remove your dependence on others for your basic needs?

From March 1st through March 20th, we are forewarned that people are not who they seem during this time.  Those who we thought were friends, may have only been getting close to us to find out how to hurt us.  It is a time where people turn against us.  We are really finding out more about who people truly are and what their priorities are.  True friends will not put personal gain ahead of truth and integrity.  It may feel like we are the only one willing to stand in the truth; but remember, that is enough to expose the lies.  The more we hold strong, the more others will expose themselves.  We may not like some of the things that rise to the surface that have been hidden; but we will always benefit from knowing the truth.  Once the truth is seen, then we can take the steps needed to deal with it.

This can be a time where things work out well.  We may find successes and recognition.  Integrity is very important in getting this.  This is a time, where we can get it; even when we are not looking for it as long as we are providing true quality in our work.  It is always nice to receive these blessings; because people actually appreciate our work; and not because they are forced to do so.  It is important to celebrate our successes and accomplishments.  True friends will want to celebrate with us.  Remember, celebrating our successes is a way of being in gratitude.  It is also important that we rejoice in true successes that others are making.

We do find that accident and death energy are present during this time.  We need to use extra caution with all we do and pay extra attention to what is happening around us.  This is not a good time to travel or be in large crowds or at protests.  High profile deaths may not be the accidents that they are presented to be.  They may be the result of trying to silence a whistleblower or keeping the truth from getting out.  It can come from those that are jealous of the success others are having.  Also, it can be used to create fear and regain control in people; much in the way a sacrificial lamb is used to make an example or point to the flock.  We will want to transform this energy, and find our breakthrough; which is connected to taking back our power and control and removing corrupt leaders from their position.

We will learn a lot during this time.  We are especially learning who the real mentors and guides are; and who the false ones are.  People are being shown that celebrities are created, and are not well-noted because of great works.  There is the ability to see that many are built up with credentials and endorsements, merely because they are willing to play games and be bought off.    It is wise to keep in mind that a real mentor wants you to find your own successes, get your own experiences, and imprint your own style.  False gurus and prophets and leaders have a “God complex” and want to mold you into being just like them, so that they can put more of themselves into the world; and make money off of you, even after they have taken money to “train” you.  This same pattern plays out in “charitable foundations”, “philanthropic organizations”, political arenas, and even in many corporate structures.

I welcome you to realize that true friends will not put personal gain ahead of truth and integrity.  What if this is a good way to tell who is standing where; and to remind us that even if we are alone in the truth, it is enough to expose the lies?

I welcome you to celebrate successes; whether they are yours or someone else’s.  What if this is part of being in gratitude and supporting a flow of successes?

I welcome you to transform death and accident energy.  What if this happens when we take back our power and control; and remove corrupt people from positions of power?

I welcome you to realize that most celebrities and well-known people are created; and have not achieved their positions due to great works.  What if they have been given big credentials and endorsements as a payoff for doing what is desired by those in power?

From March 21st through the end of the month, is a time where those who are truly working in humanitarian or heart-centered energy are in command of things.  These are the people that understand true abundance and are able to generate successes with very little.  Our minds are strong and we are able to see things come through or work out well, if we are truly committed to them.  Things that we started 6 months ago may flourish or bring payoffs now.  It can also be a good time for us to have the courage to plant the seeds that we want to see grow.  Successes that we get now or later are likely to come from being willing to make the sacrifices needed to bring them forth.  It can also mean giving up a little of our own excess to help someone truly in need.  This is a time where we need to give a little in order to bring bigger gains and benefits; not just for ourselves, but others and the Earth.

Many may be a bit more introspective or reflective during this time.  There is likely to be the desire to be in quiet and peaceful spaces to connect with our innermost or Infinite Self.  It is a time where we may come face to face with our own mortality in some way; or where we realize that when we stand in unconditional love, that we will leave a positive imprint on those around us.  What we say, do, think, and feel will be how we are remembered by others; for better or worse.  When we hold our inner peace, we will be able to also give peace to others.

Balance and harmony are also emphasized.  We need to balance the Spiritual with the Earthly, the masculine and the feminine, and the inner self with the outer self.  When we do this, we will not have the need to operate from fear or urgency.  We cannot be pushed into things; and it is much harder for us to be persuaded.  It is favorable for us to be spontaneous, but not impulsive during this time.  It is a great time for fun, enjoyment, all forms of the arts, and finding ways to express our own style and personality without being judged.  This can also lead us to finding inspiration and getting unstuck where we were feeling blocked.

This time favors true leaders and working as a team with others.  It is a time where we want to draw on the wisdom of those that can help us to become stronger on our own.  These are the people and experiences that allow us to learn something, instead of just do something.  They create great experiences and work with people; instead of being over them issuing out orders.  Those leaders that operate as dictators and seek control over people will run into problems at this time; as they will be exposed from people close to them.  True leaders welcome having wise people around them, and they do not feel threatened by them.

I welcome you to work in a true humanitarian or heart-centered energy.  What if doing this allows us to create true successes, and allows us to be committed to what we are doing?

I welcome you to take the time connect with your innermost or Infinite Self.  What if connecting with your own self, allows you to work from unconditional love with others?

I welcome you to balance and harmonize polarities.  What if this keeps you from doing things out of fear and/or urgency?

I welcome you to draw on the wisdom of those that can help you to be stronger on your own.  What if this will also make you stronger when working with others?

In Summary, draw on the wisdom of others to help you be successful on your own.  Don’t follow people just because of their notoriety.  Realize true prosperity is not found in systems of control.  Be strong on your own and don’t live dependent on others.  Realize that people may not be who they appear to be.  Celebrate successes and accomplishments.

Deaths may be connected to jealous people or as an attempt to cover something up.  Realize that celebrities are created; and not because they are truly great.  Work in humanitarian or heart-centered energy.  Connect with the innermost or Infinite Self.  Balance polar opposites.  Learn from what you are doing.

What To Focus Our Actions On

All Month we may find people acting more from fear than love.  People have the tendency to be in a sort of self-preservation mode.  Many are more concerned with keeping their own personal gain and excesses over doing the “right” thing or upholding the truth.  People do not accept, acknowledge, realize, or care about the amount of damage that comes from their lies, deception, and manipulation.  Many are happy in the lies they hold onto, and don’t want anything to shake up their ability to live in their illusions.  This can lead people to attack and sabotage or go after those who do have the strength to stand in truth and integrity.  We are likely to see action taken to attack the truth and anyone that is trying to speak truth; instead of following narratives or upholding desired lies.

Relationships, friendships, and partnerships are brought into the spotlight.  Those who are false ones, are likely to be exposed during this month.  Betrayals are harder than normal to take; however, favorable connections will have our back.  This is a time where we may find a lot of hidden support for truth.  While it is not always pleasant to find out who is only concerned with what they are getting over being a true connection; we will always benefit from knowing this, and can then gladly let go of those that are working against what is right.  Those who speak the truth are likely to have each other’s back, and can find success where they work to support each other.

I welcome you to realize the tremendous amount of damage that comes from lies, deception, and manipulation.  What if the truth is so heavily attacked, because people are working from fear instead of love?

I welcome you to consider that there may be a lot of hidden support for truth.  What if those that stand with truth will have your back when you are in the truth; while others will show themselves to be traitors who will be gone as soon as they get what they want?

What To Focus Our Thoughts On

From March 1st through March 3rd, we are finding that people are thinking a lot about the people in their life.  There is a desire to know who they can and cannot trust.  We can tell this by knowing who is supporting our success; and not just asking for things from us.  These are the people that can tell us the truth about anything, even if they know we won’t like it.  They are also the people that want to see us succeed.  Our connection with them, allows us to both give and receive.  This can also be a favorable time for new relationships, friendships, and partnerships to be formed.

We may experience some challenges with those that are close to us or are family.  It is important to not allow others to break our Spirit.  We may do better to find ways to engage our physical senses with healthy indulgences.  This allows our brain to find fulfillment, even when we are struggling.  This is where we do things that are of benefit to the physical body; such as spa treatments, high quality dark chocolate, a healthy meal in a pleasant environment, or even being in nature where we can walk barefoot or smell trees or listen to a creek or the ocean.

I welcome you to know who you can and cannot trust.  What if these are people that will hold you in integrity, even when you struggle to be in it?

I welcome you to find ways to engage your physical senses.  What if this nourishes your Spirit?

From March 4th through March 14th, calls us to be responsible and practical in our choices and behaviors.  It is very important that we work with what we already have; even if we have to get a bit creative.  We do not want to speculate by using money or resources that we don’t have yet; even if they should be coming in.  When we do this, we can actually block those resources from coming through; and end up putting ourselves in a detriment.  It is important that we do the things that need to be done, and don’t procrastinate.  The more we procrastinate, the more challenging it will be to do things.

We will also need to be careful of going into rebellion and reacting to things that others are doing.  When we do this, we are probably not seeing the truth in things.  We feel attacked and “wounded” by others.  Even if there is some truth, our reactions blow things out of proportion and pull us away from the truth.  This only makes things more difficult for us than they already are.  Only when we release the reaction and charged emotions can we begin to handle things in an appropriate way, and look at what is really happening; so that we can deal with it appropriately.  If we try to work from reactions, our reactions will be used against us.

I welcome you to be practical and responsible in your choices.  What if this keeps you from creating bigger issues for yourself?

I welcome you to realize that reactions prevent you from being in or seeing the truth in things.  What if the more you react, the more difficult you make things for yourself?

From March 15th through March 30th, we will need to use caution.  This is a time where many will feel like breaking down, and having a hard time handling the pressures of the world.  This can leave people to be genuinely accident prone.  It is a time where things are ending, whether we are ready for it or not.  We want to stay focused on moving forward and breaking through any challenges that we are faced with.  Giving up, going backwards, or resisting changes will lead us to have to repeat things under harder circumstances.

During this time, the experiences we have will have a major impact on our life and lead us to make major changes.  It can be helpful to have a true mentor or guide to work with during this time.  They can help us to stay on track as we move through things.  We may also find ourselves in the position of the mentor, or the one being called on for our wisdom.  If we look to others to help us, it will be valuable for them to have experiences that inspire us to find our own greatness.  No matter how much we know, this is a time where we will expand the knowledge that we have.

I welcome you to stay focused on moving forward.  What if this helps to move you out of danger and not into it?

I welcome you to embrace your experiences as an opportunity to make major changes.  What if they can help to inspire you to find your own greatness?

March 31st, calls us to meet our obligations and responsibilities; especially where family is concerned.  However, it is important that we do not allow them to guilt us into things, or enable them in manipulating us into things.  Many who are wanting things done, are more than capable of doing things themselves.  This means that we need to discern between our obligations and what is right to do; and where others are just trying to take advantage of us or put us into a slave position to them.  These can be very fine lines; so, we need to look carefully at what we need to do and what feels right.  Remember, those that are asking for things from us are likely to have much more than we have.  In some cases, we need to leave things for others to handle, instead of allowing them to dump their work onto us and doing it for them.  Those who are dumping their workload on us, are simply lazy and not truly in need of help.

I welcome you to follow through on promises and obligations; but don’t allow yourself to be taken advantage of.  What if it is important to allow others to handle their own things, when they are perfectly capable of doing so?

Connecting To Your Soul Self

On March 1st and March 2nd, we are favored with being with those people that we feel a Soul Connection with.  We may also meet a new friend or partner that reminds us of someone from our past; and who we feel a Soul Connection with.  It is important to pay attention, and see if we feel any stress around new people.  If we do, we then need to decide if it is because they remind us of someone we have known in the past; or, if we are picking up that they are only wanting to get something from us, and are not a true friend or connection.  For the most part we will be able to interact Soul-to-Soul with others.

We are likely to be bringing endings to cycles; and it is worth taking a look to consider how we want to move forward.  It is important that we choose a path that roots us into Spirit, God, or Divine Source.  We are being called to choose between the Soul’s Path and materialism.  New relationships or connections should be able to support us, or be there for us as we go through the challenges of the Soul’s Path.  There may also be conflict between them and family; but most likely only family members that are materially focused and do not want us to live soulfully.  We need to stay alert, and realize that if we choose the Soul’s Path, those in materialism are likely to try to create suffering through removing or interfering with our ability to stand in Divine Alignment.  This can include withholding resources; even those that we are entitled to.  This is a time where we are preparing to enter a new cycle where we will be focused on spiritual work, a mission project, or ethical and humane ventures that nurtures a positive existence in our world.

I welcome you to embrace your Soul Connections and appreciate them.  What if these connections ease your stress and allow you to have Soul-to-Soul interactions; which in turn unfolds successes for you?

I welcome you to choose the Soul’s Path which will hold you rooted into Spirit, God, or Divine Source.  What if you are preparing to move into a new cycle that will focus on Spiritual Work which nurtures a positive existence in our world?

From March 3rd – March 27th, we continue to see challenges in the family unit.  Those who are materialistic are likely to see those who are embracing a Spiritual Path as not being responsible or practical.  The reality is that they want company in their misery; and they do not understand why anyone would not want all kinds of material things in their life.  As a result, they try to use money, shelter, and resources to manipulate those that are in hardship.  We have to be careful of anything that they offer us; because there will always be strings attached to it.  Those in materialism are actually in an alternate timeline that is separated from God or Divine Source.  They live separate from that; and it leaves them with a bitterness that seeks to destroy Spirit.

This is a time where it is important for us to work in responsible ways.  Part of being on a Spiritual Path, means that we realize the importance of honoring our commitments and obligations; and if we cannot do that, then we need to free ourselves from them.  We have to be careful to not allow others to persuade us; and we have no obligation to take any advice, or to do something that is not favorable for us.  We want to pay attention to any challenges with our elbows, sinuses, nerves, and breathing.  Issues in these areas are a physical manifestation of where we are not working in responsible ways, or are living by speculation or debt instead of with true money.  They can also be an indication where we are resisting what we need to do; and it is time to step up and deal with things.

I welcome you to realize that those who are lost in materialism live in a timeline that is separated from God or Divine Source.  What if that leaves them with a bitterness that seeks to destroy Spirit?

I welcome you to pay attention to physical issues with your elbows, sinuses, nerves, and breathing.  What if this is a physical manifestation, that is indicating where you are resisting doing what you need to do; and is calling you to step up and deal with things?

From March 28th through the end of the month, things tend to get a bit more stagnant during this time.  This stagnation calls us to be in reflection, consider how much we are working in alignment with Divine Principles, and where we are not standing in them.  This is all part of learning how we are sabotaging ourselves by not being in Divine Alignment.  It is all about learning from our frustrations, and embracing the process.  We always have things to learn, or deeper layers to learn about what we already know about.  It is also possible that we are simply getting a break before things get very busy.  If we don’t want to be stagnant at this time, then we can work on building up our Celestial Insurance; by helping those that cannot do things for themselves.  This is the essence of true Divine Service, where we do not need or expect anything in return.  It is done merely for no other reason than to help those in need.

Relationships, friendships, and partnerships can either add to our worth and value; or they will be trying to compete with us.  If they are true connections, they will help us to see our worth and value.  If they are not, they will compete with us and try to prove that they are better than us.  They are seeking fame, fortune, status, and recognition; and are not interested in a true connection or commitment.  They will be around in the good times, but not when times get tougher.  If we are standing in our own worth and value, we do not need to compete and we will bring out the worth and value in others.  We can accept them for who they are, even if we choose a different path than they choose.

I welcome you to embrace stagnation and blocks as an opportunity to see where you may be in a self-sabotaging pattern.  What if this helps you to learn from your frustrations?

I welcome you to know if worth and value is upheld in your connections with others.  What if true connections support each other in standing in their own worth and value; and will not compete with each other?

The Code Journey ~ 2025 Edition

[andmaybegayer]

Last Monday of the Week 2025-01-13

It Fuckin Cold

Listening: Checking out jwz's 2024 wrap-up mixtape, here's I Go Dance by Kiesza

The jwz annual and monthly mixtapes are good club music source for people like me who cannot stand to sift through piles of club music. Other good tracks from this are Spinning by Pom Pom Squad and Guess by Charli xcx

Reading: Blog catch-up, nothing too remarkable.

Playing: Getting back into Cyberpunk 2077 because I want to finish that in relatively short order. There's a lot going on! I do feel a little bit like Netrunning is OP in smaller fights where you can just dump a ton of damage onto one target and take them down in a few seconds without aiming, but I guess I can only do that because I have 20 levels in it. Presumably if I had 20 levels in Strength I'd be able to do something preposterous with a club.

After giving my parents my old VR headset I saw a good deal on a replacement and I've been kicking the tyres on that. The Quest 3 colour passthrough is for real a huge usability improvement, it's kind of hard to justify using the virtual world for the menu when you have such a good passthrough.

Otherwise, the optics are clearer and if you do run things on the headset it can push more pixels. Shunted the latest ALVR release onto it and it runs great over the wifi, potentially a little better since it supports a slightly more advanced WiFi standard.

At some point I need to talk to the furries in my life about VRChat and/or Resonite, they sound fun.

Watching: Miami Connection at Movie Night, a very bad martial arts movie made by Y. K. Kim, a Korean martial arts guy who wanted to make a movie. It's also got several full-length songs, written by one of the actors who is like. A well known shred guitar guy?

Yes that guy looks like Patrick Stickles. He's the leader of one of the gangs.

This movie has too many gangs, too many plotlines, and not enough of. well. a movie. We did all get very invested in the one guy's subplot.

Also watched the new Scott Pilgrim Takes Off. Solid comedy! It does really enjoy being a Part Of Scott Pilgrim.

Making: Household printing experiments, a fan booster for my woefully underpowered bathroom extractor.

Also, an extremely ill-fated foccacia. I will learn to Bread someday.

Ever since I started using a commercial split keyboard at work I'm now running into switching issues using Galena at home, which means I might be rebuilding Galena with a new form-factor. Again. Fortunately I know someone at work with a laser cutter so hopefully I can bug her to cut some acrylic for me.

Tools and Equipment: Lead free solder is good, but you should really get the Tin/Copper/Silver stuff, not the Tin/Copper stuff. I don't know why but that tiny bit of silver really makes an enormous difference in the way the solder flows. Tin/Copper is much like PVC sleeved wires, cheaper and possible to economize on at scale but for small projects, you should probably go for something nicer and save yourself the trouble.

[oceanicwayfarer]

Moon told me I should post this in snippets and 'semi-chapters'

But She said that I should show you all my writing abilities (and despite the fact that I should finish every single part of this scroll's contents, she thinks a preview is in order.)

It is also, maybe because the first section is about the Nightwings' experience with the entity in folklore I'm writing about. I don't have a proper name for what I'm writing, have never been good at it.

It looks much prettier with my writing on the scroll. But this will have to do, I guess.

Sometimes, I feel it is odd that others cannot see the crystalline wings-–shaped as a dragon against our moons. Throughout our history in Pyrrhia, there have been many stories and rumors about those that we cannot see. Though there’s always one thing that lines up every time with these circumstances. It’s always during the heightened part of the moon cycles. Full Moons, the Brightest Night, etcetera.

Of course, it’s not always the case with me. I’ve seen one particular dragon outside the reaches of my home in the Nightwing Kingdom. Once the fires are put on for display, we're in peak performance at the Market District. I can always see him, Ethereal and Crystalline against our moons. No one can see him, and some dragons call me crazy for even bringing it up. 

At least not all dragons call me a lunatic for it. Some of the Nightwing Elders say otherwise, they speak about how our Lunar Festivals are supposed to represent the dead making their way amongst the stars and our moons, and these dragons exist to help those alongside their path through life, always ending in the afterlife. 

I had asked them why I had seen them, and it was an answer as clear as day. I had that ability to, I was born under the brightest night, to a happy mother and beaming father. A set of teardrops under my eyes. But it still didn’t make sense. There were always other tribes that had seen the same dragon that I had seen, right? There was never a reason for me to have these special abilities, since other dragons across the other tribes have been able to see these beings. I do not know their status amongst our world. 

The elders have said they’re nothing more than benevolent entities of dragons long gone to help others amongst their journey across the stars. Guiding them to the Afterlife. It’s an interesting outlook on what they might be. Given our standing as Nightwings, I’m surprised very few even see these beings. Maybe they only make themselves known, so that Dragons are comforted by the idea of others looking after them.  

Then why are they here for me? That’s something I’ve been trying to mull over for the past couple of moon cycles I’ve seen. Of course, I won’t let it get in front of my studies, or my chores, or the hunting, or hanging out with my friends. But here and now as I’m writing this? I’m unsure. Staring outside on this hill, quill, ink and scroll in claw. Writing into the hours while hoping they appear before me. It doesn’t exactly feel like they will, though. 

I wonder if other tribes have different names for our three moons. They probably do. I wouldn’t think a tribe like the Skywings and Mudwings would especially call them the names that we call them. From left to right, we have Selene, Luna and Artemis. Some of our elders worship Artemis, our eldest moon. Apparently the other two had come as an event during the Lunar Festival. When a Dragon is born under the Brightest Night with a Lunar Eclipse under way. 

They say it makes the dragon destined to become one amongst the stars, and I guess all three of them hit that chance event to become a Moon. I wonder if they’re still sentient, still looking over us in these trying times. Of course that’s only what the elders have been saying, but what’s not to tell it as truth? There has to be some merit to these words. They’re old enough into their lives that they themselves could witness some of these things. 

It always wraps back around to one thing, though… 

Why me? 

[eternal-haunt]

I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Captain, I'm in a real situation.

What'd you say, Hal?

Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species… What are you doing?

Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!

Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious!

Is that another bee joke?

No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is.

Who's that?

Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane.

Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?

Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory… That's Barry! …is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small… Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense."

Get this on the air!

Got it.

Stand by.

We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow.

Black and yellow!

Hello! Left, right, down, hover.

Hover?

Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time.

That may have been helping me.

And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it.

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

You snap out of it!

Hold it!

Why? Come on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow.

Black and yellow.

Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Can you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Come on. You got to think bee, Barry.

Thinking bee.

Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something.

What?

I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

What in the world is on the tarmac?

Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

Vanessa, aim for the flower.

OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around!

Not that flower! The other one!

Which one?

That flower.

I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it.

This is insane, Barry!

This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Come on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly!

Yes. No high-five!

Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius!

Thank you.

But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Can I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Can I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny.

When will this nightmare end?!

Let it all go.

Beautiful day to fly.

Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend.

Thinking bee!

Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Can we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

What on earth does this mean...?

[disease-danger-darkness-silence]

The White Ally Manifesto

I was planning on making a free ebook but honestly it's just bullet points. I may make a printable booklet or pamphlet that better explains everything.

This is my idea (as a white person. POC, you are welcome to correct me as you see fit. Genuinely, I am trying to talk to other white people about how to be good allies. You are obviously welcome to this convo) of what a good ally to POC should look like. It means acknowledging certain things and taking certain actions.

~~~~~~~~~~

I am not directly responsible for all of the bad things happening to people of color today, and I acknowledge that.

However! Many of my ancesters were, and many people who look like me are.

I must acknowledge that I benefit from the system of racism that oppresses people of color, even if I don't personally see it in action.

That's how privilege works: you don't see it, because you've never had to.

I may have done things in the past that I am ashamed of. I must learn from those mistakes, not brush over them or ignore them.

It is my job to educate myself on my privilege, and on the system of oppression that I operate within.

It is not the job of people of color to educate me.

It is not the job of people of color to forgive me.

However, when a person of color speaks about their experience as a person of color, it is my responsibility to listen, with my whole head and heart. Their experience may not be universal, but it is their truth. At the very least, I owe it to the world to bear witness to other people's truth. But when people talk, there is a potential learning experience to be had.

My experience is also not universal. It is only my truth, and no one else's. The sooner I am able to recognize that, the sooner I can begin the good work of dismantling the kyrarchy.

This is not about me. This is not about me. This. Is. Not. About. Me.

I must see color, because the system we exist in sees it. I am not color-blind to prejudice and racism. I cannot afford to be.

My social justice will be intersectional. I will acknowledge that race, ethnicity, sex, religion, culture, perceived sexuality and gender, and a multitude of other microcosms of what it means to be human, all play a part in oppression.

Identity politics is not my role to partake in. I will not attempt to gatekeep anyone from any community (unless they're Nazis, and then yes, I will gatekeep them).

I must know what strengths and weaknesses I have in order to be a good, strong ally. This means being very honest with myself about what I am willing to give up to do the right thing. I will question if I am willing to be an outcast; if I am willing to have friends and family angry at me; if I am willing to be arrested; if I am wiling to die.

I will have the strength to stand up for people of color, women, LGBTQIA+ people, and any other oppressed minority that I see being oppressed, whether that is a micro- or a macro-aggression.

I will, however, listen if POC tell me to shut up, stand down, or chill out. I will let POC take the lead on their own justice, because this is not about me.

This list of I statements is incredibly ironic and I will also acknowledge that.

I will protect the identities of those around me, and myself if it keeps them safe.

I am there to lend legitimacy to the movement. I will not engage in violence or property damage if it will harm the cause (which is almost always).

If someone is attempting to encourage me to engage in violence or property damage, I will assume that person is a Fed and trying to discredit the movement.

If I am not welcome or needed in a particular situation or place, I will leave quietly and without protest.

I will not tolerate the presence of abusers, potential cult leaders, and narcissistic personalities in the movement. I will support efforts to remove them so that people feel safe.

I will always remember that I have more growing to do.

And I will always rmemever that this is not about me. It is about what I can give to a good and just cause, not what recognition I can attain.

[44-moved-44]

Trojan horses, a concept/species I made specifically for my AVA AU which I made ninety-nine percent for worldbuilding and Victim + Purple

More info under the cut

Trojan horses are predatory, vaguely horse-like creatures with reptilian qualities.

While not malicious in nature they are highly dangerous as they view sticks as prey, and thus will attempt to lure them.

Trojan horses typically stand at around 2.3m (7'7") and weight around as much as a mildly large car. They are covered in a smooth skin with rigid plating on vulnerable areas (belly, joints, maw, skull, etc.) and are typically orange to red in hue.

They do not have eyes and rely on smell and hearing to scout their food; most things in the digital world don't really have good eyesight anyway.

Their horns are often used to determine a mate, and they do not stay with those that they form offspring with, and will abandon their young once they have generated.

Most notably, trojan horses have four special plates on the back of their upper hind legs; these are used to connect themselves to the buildings they create by splitting off their code.

"Passive" trojan horses, once they have not found a proper den to create, will be absolutely massive; well over nineteen metres and will appear vaguely serpent-like, before shedding their code to create a building in which they will spread around fliers, posters, etc. just advertisements in-general in order to get sticks (or even just animals in-general) to come to their den, where they will be consumed.

The wires keep them from going too far from the building as they will not be able to find their way back if they leave it, as they cannot see.

There is a domesticated variant called giffyups which were created via a domesticated cursor converting them into gif files. They are common transportation and livestock in rural regions, and have roughly the emotional and intellectual capacity of a bearded dragon; they can display affection and respond to their name, but don't appear to feel genuine love and only seem to experience very basic emotions.

[mephinomaly]

[TL] BIOHAZARD/Chapter 2

[ This post uses Ois~su ♪ ]

Koga: Stop givin’ out lectures like we’re newborns or somethin’~.

I get it, I know all that! That’s why I hate it and I hate even more that there’s nothing I can do. All that happens is I keep goin’ on those stupid shows with a stupid smile on my face!

Rei: Hm. As a result of that, we’ve become a unit that completes activities terribly half-heartedly.

We were unable to specialise in hardrock nor being playboys therefore other units were able to monopolise that gap in the market.

Well, the world is in recession. If you are struggling financially and want to go out to eat, it’s better to go to a restaurant that specialises in what you want to eat rather than a family restaurant that serves a variety of dishes.

Our fans have made themselves clear via numbers. It’s only human nature to want to eat something more delicious if the price is the same.

Therefore in our current state, we are struggling in comparison to units that have specialised in something. The difference between effort and experience is being laid bare for all to see.

Koga: Yeah. It’s like that story where the bat keeps messin’ around who’s side they’re on and then both the beasts and the birds don’t wanna be friends with him.[1]

Rei: Quite. Whilst the foundations are still stable, it will only be so long before it begins to shake.

One day, we will be alone and have nowhere to go. We will end up standing in solitude in a trap of our own design.

We’ll be at rock bottom, we’ll be idols that don’t sell anymore.

Koga: Then, then what do we do? If we understand what's happenin’, we can actually do somethin’ ‘bout it, right?

But we can’t just give up ‘n pretend everythin’s fine.

Rei: Indeed. We must fight against this, we cannot lay in wake, waiting to be destroyed.

Kaoru: Yep, we need to do something, definitely.

Rei: Mhm. Of course, Rhythm Link is getting antsy and, as always, is trying to interfere.

Koga: Those guys are so fuckin’ conceited… That’s what I hate ‘bout them.

They’ll always treat us like we’re newbies that can’t do anythin’.

Rei: Though in the past, they would have left newcomers like us to our own devices.

A while ago, at the idol industry’s biggest festival, SS, all of the veteran units that RhythmLink boasts about failed to produce any meaningful results.

As a result of that, the value of youngins like us has increased. As well as that, we are RhythmLink’s main breadwinners so if we were to crash in popularity, it would create a massive problem for management.

Consequently, in order to break this deadlock, they have requested we participate in a “certain experiment” that ES seems to be planning.

Adonis: Experiment…? That’s a rather disconcerting word.

Koga: Haa? What kinda experiment do they want us as guinea pigs for then?

Rei: The project is top secret, so we will be kept in the dark until we accept—

The name of the experiment is “Artificial Intelligence Idol Experiment”, abbreviated to AIIE.

Koga: Huh? Artificial intelligence…?

Kaoru: Seems to be a pretty popular topic nowadays. AI, I mean.

Adonis: Ah, artificial intelligence is something that can create images and pieces of text with skill.

I am still not good at writing in Japanese, and when I was struggling with it, Yuuki, who is very well informed on the topic, introduced it to me.

The AI was really good at drawing pictures, so when I patted and praised my phone, Yuuki looked shocked.

Koga: Oh yeah speakin’a which, I like that four-eyed bean sprout. Haa, what a nerd.

Adonis: In Yuuki’s case, he’s really good at what he does. You can’t ridicule him for that.

To be honest, using AI was very convenient. My previously clunky sentences had been transformed into beautiful Japanese prose.

It was so convenient that I almost felt as if I had lost any motivation to learn to write or draw myself.

Rather than struggle with Japanese, wouldn’t it be better if I allowed AI to do it all for me?

Kaoru: I’ve heard that AI scours the internet and uses images without the artists’ permissions, leading to issues to do with copyright and stuff. I don’t think it’s a good idea to rely too much on AI, you know~?

If everyone else is doing it, you shouldn’t feel guilty, but it’s still a crime at the end of the day, right?

Adonis: I understand. Even a kitchen knife can be used to kill someone. I suppose it depends on the moral values the user has and how they intend to use it.

Rei: Hm. Since the exact details are unclear, I cannot say this for sure, but is AIIE about AI versions of idols that can… draw well?

I am an old man, I do not really understand newfangled technologies such as that.

Koga: You’re still pullin’ the grandpa card… Anyway, pisses me off if RhythmLink is tryna order us around but guess there’s nothin’ we can do ‘bout it.

Do we seriously hafta take part in an experiment called AIIE?

Rei: If we try our best and it doesn’t work out, we can pull out. This is just a trial.

Since we cannot come up with anything else to escape this situation, I suppose there is no issue with taking advantage of this.

[ ☆ ]

koga references one of Aesop's fables “the bats, the birds, and the beasts”. Basically the birds and the beasts declare war against each other. When the birds ask the bats who’s side they’re on, the bats say “i have wings, so i am on your side.” but when the beasts ask too, the bats say “i have sharp teeth and fur, so i am on your side.” later, once peace had been negotiated, the beasts and the birds realised how deceitful the bats had been and turned on them. Now bats live in fear, and only come out at night

Chapter 1

Chapter 3

[cod-with-boobs]

Okay, so I’ve been thinking about the ways in which Aziraphale and Crowley reflect/contrast each other, especially in terms of their outward presentation.

Crowley’s look, Crowley’s style, is constantly shifting with the times. He’s always fashionable, he’s always of the moment, and he’s always changing.

Aziraphale is seemingly the opposite. He has worn like a total of 3 different outfits since the 1790s. He likes the way things are and he does not like change.

Because of this, it’s easy to assume that Crowley is mercurial while Aziraphale is the rock of the dynamic, but I think it’s the other way around.

Crowley has known from very early on that he is a “demon who follows hell as far as he can”, and made peace with that. For appearances, doing outward good is something he tries to avoid, but for him hell has always been a job, and not an alignment. So while outwardly it would appear that Crowley’s appearance changes constantly because of internal instability, the fact that he is able to change so often and with such little indecision is moreso indicative of his strong sense of self.

Aziraphale on the other hand, is presented as someone who experiences a lot of inner conflict. While heaven is undoubtedly a job to Aziraphale too(with the Arrangement showing that much of the work he does for heaven is just that, work), it is also an alignment to him. He has a very clear cognitive dissonance where he does genuinely believe that heaven is the side of the good guys, while witnessing firsthand the corruption it’s capable of. He has his own developed sense of morality, one that accommodates shades of grey and the complexities of existence, but he also has heaven’s sense of morality, which is, as Crowley points out, very black and white. He often charges into situations fully confident that there is an objective Right answer, and that Right answer is the one that aligns most closely with heaven’s mission statement. He spends much of his time justifying and believing in heaven while directly counteracting its goals with his actions. He becomes visibly troubled whenever he is forced to acknowledge the fact that goodness as he knows it contradicts goodness as heaven defines it, so he spends as little time acknowledging it as possible. As he spends more time on Earth and more time with Crowley, he finds himself increasingly pulled between two deeply significant core characteristics, his loyalty to heaven and his own sense of right and wrong. He doesn’t know where he stands. He hasn’t known where he’s stood since he gave Adam a flaming sword at the gate of Eden. So, to combat how confusing and tumultuous and distressing his thoughts are, he entrenches himself in familiar behaviors and routines, convincing himself that if everything stays the same, then he’ll never have to pick a side, fully abandoning either the comfort he has carved out on earth, or the simple, severe, orderly views on right and wrong heaven has instilled in him. Through all of the many layers of denial, Aziraphale is deeply aware that his two belief systems cannot coexist, and that at some point, one will win out over the other. But for now, for the past 6000 odd years, it has been enough to follow orders, love humanity and the world quietly enough as to not draw heavenly scrutiny, and wear the same outfits, drink the same tea, putter around the same bookshop with the same old friend who works for hell. Maybe if he continues with these rituals forever, then he can will things not to change. Aziraphale is terrified of change within himself, so he makes sure to minimize the change around him, because that is something he can control.

Whether intentionally or not, Crowley often forces Aziraphale to take responsibility for his decisions. For Aziraphale, living like Crowley means accepting that he is no longer strictly operating by heaven’s rule book, and that is not always a truth Aziraphale is prepared to handle, hence “you go too fast for me Crowley”.

TL;DR: Crowley = fast moving, outwardly changing, but inwardly steady. Aziraphale = attached to habit, outwardly predictable, but inwardly unsteady.