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#incoming vent sorry about it
I have a migraine 🤪
#incoming vent sorry about it#¯\_(ツ)_/¯#life sucks and im so over all this shit#it's literally been the what like year from hell#so my mom almost died this time last year and there's been all kinds of fun ptsd like symptoms from that and then my dog died and then#everyone got covid and then i got a sinus infection because i can't do anything normal#now last week i was thinking about what i need to talk to my doctor about and I'm thinking about my symptoms and mom's like that sounds like#lupus which is what my mom has and now I've been so super stress sick and I'm just trying to chill and relax and my estranged family member#is trying to work their way back into our lives and throwing a fit cause we won't let them because they've threatened and tried to kill us#all on multiple occasions and i know the threats are going to start up again and I'm worried that this time they're serious#i know this is either going to go one of two ways and they're going to try to kill us or themselves and i just i don't know#i don't know what to do about it because we don't have any proof of these threats written down because they've all been verbal#my family doesn't really know what to do either but i know the getting a gun conversation is going to come up again#and then I'm going to have to outwardly admit that I'm not stable enough for that shit and then everyone's going to freak the fuck out and#ughhh god i just can't deal with this shit anymore it's all bad and it all fucking sucks ass#oh and I'm trying to give up for the day and go to bed so I'm looking for YouTube videos to keep my mind busy and someone i follow#is having to live post that they're trying to keep their friend from committing suicide because the friend turned it into a public thing and#the yt is trying to reassure everyone and it's just all too much#I'm too on edge I'm too triggered or whatever i don't know what the fuck to do anymore i just want to go to bed and sleep until everything#is magically better. also i have three publishers breathing down my neck for this book but i haven't been able to write in months because of#all of this shit and then i had the bright idea of starting a writing blog i have NO CONTENT for and just FUCK fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck#i just want to go be a fucking snap under the ocean im done fuck all of this being a human fucking sucks and I'm exhausted#oh and also my brother for randomly offered a job I've been trying to get for fucking years so ✌🏽😁✌🏽 that's also doing great things for#me i am super proud of him though cause he's working his fucking ass off i hope he takes it cause if not i will punt him into the sun#but anyway I've had it officially! so good night tumblr stay classy#izzy speaks but i really shouldn't
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fenrishion · 4 months
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growing older is weird once you start becoming more emotionally mature than your parents and start realizing how emotionally instable they are and that none of these fuckers should be allowed to have kids in the first place
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batwynn · 23 days
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I literally offered free work for a few projects because it was a bucket list item for me and I still got turned down. I genuinely don’t know where to go from here because what does that mean about my work when it’s not even worth free?
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dandyshucks · 3 months
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ouhhhh the neighbour doesn't have any supplies of her own for crochet and I'm teaching her and my mother today starting in just over an hour
and i am ... not selfish with my supplies but i am unemployed and living off a very tight budget (cannot purchase any more yarn for projects unless i manage to do some pretty spectacular savings on my groceries for the month which is... not very doable) so I'm a tad worried she's going to be good at crocheting and want to Make Something with the yarn that i do have fjdskl and I would normally be totally fine with that but considering there's basically nowhere in town to buy yarn (i've had to buy online) and shipping is $20+ lately, that's not exactly a great thing for me right now 🧍‍♂️
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irritablepoe · 10 months
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how to stop crying about mushimizo
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galaxywhump · 4 months
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I'm really sorry for this but I could really use some cheering up tonight
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coffee-bat · 8 months
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i haven't been having the best time lately
#sorry vent incoming in tags. you dont have to read you really can skip this#/so the day before yesterday i had a major argument with mom. about something incredibly small but she got super mad at me (basically i#suggested she might have made a mistake while cleaning the oven bc when i turned it on i smelled and felt burning chemicals. like-#-teary eyes and sneezing i wasn't imagining it. and she got super mad and started yelling)#for the whole afternoon it was either silent treatment or yelling abt how what i said is 'unforgivable'#and ofc rejecting apologies and attempts to calm the situation down bc 'this isn't something you can just fix with an apology'#i literally just asked if she's sure everything went right with the oven cleaning. bc it was done in a rush.#so anyway at 10pm i HAD to get the situation to a manageable level bc i was starving and she was in the living room (we have an open kitchen#) so if i wanted to get sth to eat i'd have to confront her. so screaming match ensued again with me apologizing and explaining my point -#and her yelling over me. it went on for 40 minutes. finally after me apologizing like 70 times she calmed down but said that 'what i did is-#-unacceaptable and she does not give permission for it to happen again'. i went to sleep without getting anything to eat of course.#and this fucked me up. bc i really thought we were doing better. i really thought our relationship would only get better now esp after we -#-bonded on vacation. but turns out not. and shes still lowkey mad.#THEN yesterday im studying for a zoology exam and mention it on the phone with her#she goes 'who do you have zoology for'. i respond with the name of the teacher. confused.#'professor (x) died on friday.'#??????????#'it's not published anywhere yet so yeah YOU have to tell your class'#i had a panic attack legit. i threw up from stress. i couldnt do it. first off bc of shock and secondly bc how am i supposed tojust jump#into group chat like 'oh hey btw professor died'#thankfully the info was posted officially by uni at 10pm. so i didnt have to do it. but mom kept pressing me to the whole day#i was nauseaous all of yesterday bc of it. i couldnt manage to study anymore after the shock. sure he was older but he was so energetic and#seemed healthy. i wouldnt have expected it it was just. a huge shock. im still not over it#like you cant know someone for half a year then not be shaken when they suddenly die yknow. and mom is lowkey making fun of me like#'what were you emotionally attached??? he wasnt anyone close'#no he wasnt but im still shaken. and being mocked is only making it worse. as is having to keep studying for his subject for the next few-#-days.#sorry ok vent over theres just. a lot happening for me and im struggling i needed to let it out ig. theres just too much at once#vent#death mention
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cold-neon-ocean · 10 months
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short-ish vent/explanation as to why things have been so slow sobs
I don’t really feel the passage of time anymore but it’s crazy how much time I’ve lost just since February to just one after another dealing with the house pets. First our puppy’s neuter, then my sister bringing her cats into the house, her cats tearing things up and needing to be watched constantly (by me of course bc I’m the only one here), her cats then giving everyone ringworm which was a nearly 2 month ordeal that we’re still recovering from physically and financially, and now both puppies (one has seemed to recover now) are having some sort of intestinal issue the vets don’t know the cause of, but I’m just cleaning bloody diarrhea (its not parvo, the vet tested) and doing laundry all day.
I never really got the chance to recover from the introduction of the puppies back in September last year. I feel like my life has been overtaken by all these animals completely against my will and out of my control. Mom is just hemorrhaging money from all these obligations and vet bills she never planned/asked for, and I’m trying to help (despite none of these pets being mine) while also barely having the time to work that I used to. I used to be able to sit at my desk nearly all day without being interrupted but now dealing with all these animals by the time I get to sit at my desk I’m exhausted and it’s like 7pm but I gotta get up at 6am to give out medications and make breakfast for 5 pets.
Its starting to calm down but I’m just really upset over how all this affected my ability to work since these extended wait times reflects on my business very poorly and it’s just been killing me because this is not how I normally conduct things but I just had the rug completely snatched from under me and haven’t really been able to get back up. 
I also want to make clear that none of these animals are mine, nor did I have anything to do with the decision making to get them. I was told by my fam that it was expressly kept secret from me- literally until the animals came through the front door, because they knew I’d be upset because I’d have to watch them since I’m the only one home. The only pet that belongs to me is my leopard gecko who is a perfect angel boy who I’ve had not one issue with since getting him (he just turned 2 last month). 
Things are (hopefully) starting to stabilize, I’m praying that we can have just a little time without an animal having some sort of health crisis. I’m really sorry this has been such a long running thing, I never could have anticipated for any of it. I’m so grateful for the patience of my commissioners and am especially sorry to them, this isn’t normally how my business handles and I’m really ashamed of it.
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stonerzelda · 1 year
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Oough boy well ive been yelled at by two different aggressively italian women this week for fucking up superbly in different aspects at work and @ home sao. Gabi about 2 get a rude awakening in life very soon lol.. ;_;
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weedle-testaburger · 11 months
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i wish i had a time machine for the specific purpose of going back in time to book stuff i really should've done when i had time and/or it was cheap enough to
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reallyhardydraws · 1 year
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caught a cold 😷 oof. was gonna work today and be like ayyy grindset no days off! but uhhh i might just upload the leftovers from yesterday's market onto my online shop and then call it for the day: anyone waiting on commissions (i think its just 2 people right now) i'll start up working on those tomorrow
commissions are absolutely open though and i think if you want something specifically in time for the 25th december i can still get them done if you email me on or before the 21st.
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mitamicah · 11 months
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*screams and cries in Danish*
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sixftmp3 · 11 months
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sotd.
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sunnibits · 1 year
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*insert that one office meme* making ocs is so cool, I’d love to know literally anything about them some day :)
#vent that I will probably regret later incoming sorry!#feel free to ignore#aaahahaa I honestly need to stop looking at other ppls oc art because it literally just makes me mad!!#whyyyy the fuck is everyone else always better at making ocs then I am 😐 I’m tired of it#yes I may post nonstop ab loving Reggie but honestly. I am constantly sick with envy about other ppls ocs#it just feels like everyone else always has soooo many more cool ocs and they’re so much more developed#like they actually know what’s fucking going on and they’re actually interesting#and have cool ass designs that I could never come up with#and I’m sick of it!! I’m sick of it!!!! I just want that!!#why am I literally incapable of making characters I actually care about I don’t get it#every time I try to come up with an original story I get bored fucking instantly#it has helped a little but to stop worrying about stories so much and just make ocs that are fun to draw#but god I just want cool fun ocs!! more of them!!!! that I actually know shit about!!#like am I just lazy or is developing characters sooo hard#no matter how much I like a character in the beginning I always feel like everybody else’s ideas are a million times cooler#ugh#I’m fucking tired of it#like how am I supposed to fulfill my childhood dream of writing a novel if I never produce any original ideas that I’m able to stick to 😐#I’m just! so jealous!#ugh sorry for venting and being embarrassing I’m just in a weird mood tonight#probably will delete later
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hello! do you know of any other tmnt fics that are from regular peoples pov?
thank you and have a good day!
Not really? I’m sure there must be *some*
Fairly certain that this one time I saw a platonic Donnie x Reader on tumblr where you encounter a turtle while walking your dog at night and it’s Donnie while his leg is infected and so you help him out and then y’all kinda just keep hanging out
There *was* this one cool series, but as it turns out, the author ships the turtles together, so. Rip to that
And other than that I have legit not seen anything. Not anything that wouldn’t either be an xReader or an OC story, and while I like both to a certain level it’s not really the genre I’m looking for. So, y’know! Nothing left to do but write it ourselves! Because I don’t want a romance between a turtle and a character/me, and I don’t want like.. detailed knowledge of one person! The story I’m looking for is basically… New York as a collective consciousness, being more or less aware of the turtles and other odd things in its innards. The whispers between strangers!
My Revolution a radio does have like.. a few reappearing characters that I hope you’ll love but I’m trying not to make them *main* characters as much as they’re just plot devices, if that makes sense.
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