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watercolor-hearts · 2 months

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i just saw your logan/george/alex universe and i'm obsessed with it actually

[First mention of the Logan/George/Alex universe.]

Hi dear ❤

Yesterday, in connection with this, I told you I can be too much sometimes. Well, now here’s the proof. Let me introduce you to my Logan/George/Alex universe in 10K words. (My longest “story” ever. 😂)

I love talking about my stories/universes but it feels weird to just simply write posts about it when nobody’s asked, so I usually just wait for games and asks to talk about them. This post is really long because it contains a lot of quotes from our conversation with my friend, @starlightiing Jess, with whom I created this universe. In the beginning I tried to simply just talk about it but after a while it turned into me putting our chat/role play messages into it because I felt like that’s the best way of showing how this universe works and what people’s personalities are like in it.

Important information: This universe is heavy on non-sexual cardiophilia because I’m a cardiophile and since I’ve got a cardiophile friend I became more open about putting heart things into my stories/universes, especially into ones we just talk about for fun with my friend. (We put heart things into everything because that’s what makes us happy.) So yeah, this is basically about hearts and the comfort they give. And there also are a few mentions of panic attacks and a detailed description of one towards the end. If any of these topics makes you uncomfortable, please don’t read this post. If you decide to read it, I hope you’ll enjoy it! ❤

And now let’s dive into this Logan/George/Alex universe:

Okay, so, I went back to reread the whole conversation where we built this universe with my friend and I realized that the thing that actually started it is the ask I received in connection with Logan’s heart and to which I made this drawing. I completely forgot that it was that ask that started it. 😀

I’m gonna quote some things I wrote to my friend to show how it started. So, after receiving that ask, I started thinking about it, about Logan’s heart and Logan himself, and wrote this: “Logan for me is like some kind of sad boy who’s alone with no close friends, trying to survive and show his potential that might be there, might not; someone that has the sad story where things didn’t turn out the way they should’ve and he’s left alone.”

This universe starts with George asking Alex how Logan is, because he had crashed out in the race and things aren’t going too well overall and he’s a bit worried about him and about how he handles these things. Alex tells him that Logan seemed upset, to which George replies with wanting to go and check on him and maybe try and make him feel a bit better. So they go to Logan’s room and they see that he tries to look okay but George knows that he isn’t.

George offers a hug which Logan accepts but then things change quickly and Logan’s breathing becomes irregular and it worries George, especially when he sees Logan pressing his hand to his chest. But then he remembers Alex mentioning that Logan does this sometimes, especially before races, and Alex thinks it’s some kind of soothing mechanism for him. So George tries not to worry too much and helps Logan through this panic attack, his big hand resting on Logan’s back, telling him how to breathe to make it go away easier and when things calm down a bit, he asks Logan about this ‘hand on his chest’ thing. Logan tells him that it’s for comfort, to tell/show his heart that everything’s alright and he’s there and it’s fine, they’re in this together and they’ll get through it. George tells him that he has a similar soothing mechanism, putting his hand on his stomach, so he knows how much it can help and supports Logan in using it and asks him if it’s a thing where only his own hand helps or anyone else’s could, if needed. Logan tells him that so far he has only tried his own so he doesn’t know but if George wants to try, they can. George wants to, so Logan lets him put his hand on his chest. George’s so gentle and soft that it makes Logan immediately connect with him because he hasn’t felt anyone touch him like this in a long time and the closeness and gentleness does things to his brain. George smiles and tells Logan that he can feel his heartbeat but it’s starting to slow down and that’s a good sign, he’s done a good job with following George’s instructions. He keeps his hand there until Logan’s breathing goes back to normal.

After this, they start talking about the race, the crash and Logan’s feelings. Alex gets them tea and George pulls Logan into a hug when he sees Logan needs it because he looks like he’s close to crying. Logan doesn’t know why he’s suffering so much and why can’t things work and he doesn’t know what to do and it’s just too much. He can’t hold it back anymore, he starts crying. George holds him close and lets him cry because he knows how much a good cry can help. And after a while, he notices that George’s slow heartbeat helps him calm down and he starts to drift off.

Another quote from the messages I sent to my friend: “In the beginning he can’t even believe that George is there to hug him. Because okay, yeah, Alex is nice, they’re teammates, he’s there for him, but George. He doesn't have to. And he's still there. And holds him. For hours. When he could hold Alex instead or they could have a sexy time or anything else. But they’re there with him, talking about race mistakes they all have made (or suffer because of others) and then when George sees the tears in Logan's eyes, he can’t just sit there anymore, he has to hug him. And it comes as a surprise for Logan because he usually only gets pats on the back/shoulder. But a hug is different. A George hug. And in the beginning he doesn’t even know how amazing a George hug is. But when he realizes it's not just a quick hug and George positions himself to rest his back against the headboard, he starts crying because people don't do this to him anymore. They don't cuddle him. When he was a kid, they did, maybe. But he’s not a kid anymore. And he doesn't even realize how much he needs it, someone to hold him, feel their calm breathing, hear their heartbeat... He thinks he’s dreaming. But he isn’t. Not until the tears dry while Alex strokes his back or hair and he falls asleep.”

It’s usually George who provides the physical connection and the comfort and Alex is the one who talks and gives advice, but sometimes they do what the other does, too. I think it fits them to be there for someone who’s been alone and needs some love and support.

Next morning they have breakfast together and George makes Logan promise to call/text him if he needs him. Logan promises.

And then George actually gets a text a few weeks later. And Logan can’t believe George actually came when he shows up at his hotel room. He thought George only offered Logan to text/call him because he wanted to be nice to him. But he’s actually there and it means so much to Logan because he’s having another panic attack and he needs help. And this is the first time he was brave enough to text George. And George is there for him, pulls him into a hug and tells Logan never hesitate to text him if he needs him. Logan promises he won’t and nuzzles into George’s chest, feeling and listening to his heartbeat. It slowly becomes a comfort thing for him.

And after a while George and Alex basically adopt Logan and they’re always there for him when he needs them, whether he needs someone to talk to or just needs a hug or something. They’re there for him, and Alex and George have such a healthy relationship that it’s never a problem for Alex to see George being close to Logan, letting him snuggle into his chest, things like that. He’s not jealous because he knows how nice feeling it is to be pressed against George’s chest, feeling his breathing, hearing his heartbeat… It’s one of the best things in the world. And George would never say no to hug someone or let them listen to his heart if that’s what they need. He likes to help people.

When George notices how much his heartbeat and breathing helps Logan to calm down, he tells about it to Alex and Alex has the amazing idea of trying to record it (first with the shot glass technique) for Logan so he can listen to it even when George can’t be there for him. Especially after he leaves F1.

Another quote from a message I wrote to my friend: “Imagine George getting a ‘thank you for the recording. I listened to it again and it helped. It always helps.’ text every time Logan listens to the recording. It makes George smile. He’s glad he can help this way too. He never thought recording his heartbeat and breathing could help as much as it helps Logan. It’s a pleasant surprise for him.

Now there’s a scene in my mind with Logan lying in the bed, earbuds in his ears, recording playing. He puts one of his hands on his chest and the other on his stomach, and he tries to match George’s breathing and heartbeat with the breathing technique George taught him. It’s not panic this time, it’s just the night of a difficult day and he needs a bit of comfort and calmness because his mind and heart is still racing and his body is tense. But concentrating on George’s heartbeat and breathing slowly helps him to calm down and it also eases the tension in his body. His heart slows down beneath his palm and he can sleep peacefully. ❤”

And another one: “He’d show the message to Alex and he’d tell him how happy and honored he is because he didn’t think a simple thing like this could help so much. “It’s just my heart and breathing. I didn’t think it's this big of a thing. It’s so simple. It comes with me, I don’t really think about it most of the time. But seeing what it means to him...” And Alex would say something like “It might be a simple thing to you but it means the world to someone else and it’s beautiful. It might be “just your heart” but that’s the point of it. It’s your heart. It’s your heartbeat, your breathing pattern, and in person your skin, your hug and your body heat. And your voice, if you talk, too. This is the beauty of it. That it’s all you. I’m glad you let him experience it. It means the world to him. I know, because it means the world to me, too.” And tears appear in George’s eyes.”

And after this Alex and George start making new recordings from time to time so Logan always has something new to listen to. “And when Logan sees it he's like ‘oh my God, But... But he didn't have to... And he still did it. Again. And he said he'd do one next month too.’ And he tries not to get emotional about it but it’s hard not to be because he really appreciates how much George (and Alex) cares about him.”

And after a while George wants to send more clear recordings (because the shot glass technique usually results in not so clear recordings) so they upgrade the setup from the shot glass to a stethoscope. “Imagine him sending a pic of it to Logan with a text that says ‘next recording in progress’. Logan would be like ‘holy shit man.’ And he’d start thinking really hard about what to do next time when they meet, to thank him/them for this. Because at that point a ‘thank you so much’ is not enough.”

“George, in a text message: ‘Let me know if there’s something that needs to be changed. We tried to make it as clear as possible but it’s not perfect. Also, if you have a spot preference for next time, let me know and we’ll focus on that. Here’s a pic of the spots and time stamps for the recording to know which you’re listening to when. I don’t know much about it, Alex helped with it.’ And Logan’s like ‘oh my god’ tries not to cry, heart beating like crazy ‘it’s perfect, it’s always perfect no matter what oh my god thank you so much again and always’, And he’s there, sitting on the edge of the bed, his heart beating out of his chest, listening to the newest recording and God, it’s so clear he can hear the valves open and close, the blood whooshing through them. It’s another level. He still doesn’t understand why George does this for him when he doesn’t have to. But he’ll forever be grateful for it.”

Also, something that’s important to mention is that George doesn’t really know that much about hearts, only those things he has to know for training, it’s actually Alex who knows a bit more than a normal person. In the beginning he does some research to make the recordings a bit more enjoyable for Logan, Googles how to use a stethoscope properly, what are the auscultation points, things like that, but then after a while he realizes that he might be into hearts. Okay, not all hearts but George’s heart. It’s not that big of a thing for him but it was nice to realize it. He mostly uses his knowledge to help Logan, but I’ll talk about it later.

“Logan lies down on the bed, closes his eyes and lets himself enjoy it. He doesn’t care his heart is racing, he knows he’s okay and it’s just some big emotions and it’ll calm down soon. He can’t wipe the smile off his face. And a few seconds later, he starts crying because it’s all too much and George’s so nice and Alex helping him with the recording and everything... He feels like he doesn’t deserve them. Even though George always says Logan deserves to be happy and if they can make him at least a bit happy with these recordings, then they’ll continue making them.

After listening to this recording, Logan looks at the pic of the auscultation points George sent, and then goes and searches for more information about hearts, about the blood flow, the valves, and after seeing some gifs and videos, he can visualize George’s heart and how it beats, how the blood flows. He’s absolutely mesmerized by it. It’s even more incredible than he initially thought. George’s heart is so healthy, so strong and so beautiful...

George doesn’t realize it, for him it’s just his heart, nothing special. He doesn’t really listen to the recordings because Alex does the editing but he loves seeing Alex’s face while he’s listening to it. He loves that there are people who love his heartbeat. He finds it really sweet.”

And after this I started thinking about Logan’s relationship with his own heart. (I know in the beginning there’s a mention about Logan having a special relationship with his heart but that part with the hand on the chest thing wasn’t in this originally, that was born after I finished working on the drawing. Originally this is the point where Logan starts to develop an interest towards his own heart.)

“And I think listening to George’s heart and using it as something that helps him calm down could make Logan have a closer relationship with his own heart, too. Because he could realize that after listening to George’s heartbeat for quite a long time, his heart can almost sync-up with it and it could help him appreciate it more. Because he has a strong heart that calms down easily with a little bit of help and it's healthy, there aren't any problems with it and it loves when Logan listens to George’s heartbeat because now it’s so familiar it’s easy for his to pick up the same rhythm and Logan loves when beneath his palm he feels almost the same as what he hears through the earbuds.”

“Also, a thing I think George would also do for him: another recording of himself but this time it’s not his heart but his voice, helping Logan through a panic attack. Talking slowly, using different breathing techniques in case one doesn’t work, counting techniques, ‘names this and that’ techniques, everything. Some encouraging words, “you're going to be okay, it’s just panic” “you’re not alone”, “you can do this”, “pay attention to your breathing, help your heart calm down with it”, “you’re doing a great job” and things like that, with breaks between the sentences so it feels more natural. I think George would really put himself into this and he’d make an amazing and really useful audio.

And let's not forget about Alex, because this would be his idea and he’d be the one George would talk to during recording to make sure his tempo feels natural and he isn’t too fast with the things he says. And he’d enjoy this so much that he’d then make normal relaxation recordings too, and basically anything Alex or Logan wants. They both love his voice because it's soothing. And he loves making them happy. ❤”

All these heartbeat and breathing technique recordings happen after Logan leaves F1, and when we were discussing this, I thought the boys would also send nice voice/video messages to Logan, so here’s an example of that:

“‘Big day today!’ George smiles to the camera, ‘First race in (whatever series) for Logan, right, Alex?’ Alex joins the video, also smiling. ‘Yes, big day for Logie bear! We wanted to send you a quick message before your day starts to wish you good luck and a really, really nice day.’ George nods and continues: ‘We’ll be following your race and there’ll be a surprise waiting for you after the race ends. We hope you’ll like it. You’ll see what it is so we won’t say more about it now. Keep your head high and push to the max.’

‘We believe in you.’

‘And we love you. Have a nice day and again, good luck for the race. We hope to see you smile a lot today, can you do that for us?’

‘Enjoy it, that’s the most important. Goodbye until next time!’ Alex waves and George joins too, and ends the video after saying goodbye.

I'm sure a video like this would make Logan's day. Oh, and what's the surprise, you might ask. Well, it's George and Alex being there at the track but only revealing it after the race not to put too much pressure on Logan. ❤ And when Logan sees them and runs into their arms, hugging both of them at once... Oh God…”

And at this point my friend mentioned that all of the stuff with George’s heart gotta eventually make Logan curious to listen with a stethoscope in person, so… Let’s see some quotes from those messages:

“After the race they’d call him to their hotel room (after he finished the debrief and everything he has to do) to spend the night with them because they know how much he misses cuddling with George and talking with both of them in person, and they think he really deserves it after not being able to do it for a long time.

And when he gets there, everything’s the same at first, George hugging him, Alex making him tea like he usually does, then they sit down, talk a bit about the race, what was good, what could’ve been better, first impressions, things like that. And when they finished talking about this, then comes the main attraction, the stethoscope.”

“Alex just sets it down gently between them like it’s nothing at all. Like it’s normal and commonplace to just have a stethoscope there. George just looks up at Alex and smiles sweet and then looks back over at Logan. ‘Your show, if you want to use it.’”

“And Logan is like what, and he needs a moment to actually realize what’s going on because holy shit he wasn’t expecting this. He’d be happy with a cuddle and some ear stething, but this... This is insane and he can’t believe it.

‘Touch it,’ George says, seeing the hesitation on Logan’s face, ‘Try it, if you want to. On yourself, me or even Alex, if you want to. We thought you’d appreciate it if we brought it with us for you to get to know it. I’s different than listening with your ear but it’s worth a try.’

All Logan can say is ‘woow.’ He lifts up the stethoscope, touches the dark blue tube, the mirror finish chest piece, and the earpieces. It’s lighter than how he imagined it, it surprises him that the only heavy part is the chest piece. It’s really new to him to hold something like this. He doesn’t even know what to say or do. ‘Would you like to try it?’ George asks. Logan nods. ‘On who?’

Logan looks up at George for a moment, then back at the stethoscope in his hands. ‘Can I try it on you?’

‘Of course,’ George nods, smiling, ‘You can try and discover the different spots by yourself but Alex can help if you want to, he’s pretty good at finding them.’

‘First you should try it by yourself,’ Alex says, ‘It's magical, I want you to experience it by yourself, listening to the different valves, discovering the differences between how they sound, it’s a special experience. You don’t have to be afraid of it, if it doesn’t work, we’ll help. But I’m sure you can do it, it’s not difficult.’

Logan nods and tries to put in the earpieces but Alex stops him. ‘You are supposed to use it the other way around. Sounds better that way.’

‘Ah!’ Logan smiles, trying to hide his embarrassment and turns it around, ‘Thank you.’

‘I'm ready if you are,’ George says after taking off his t-shirt and leaning to the headboard, waiting for Logan to start when he’s ready.”

My friend’s reply to this: “George is so cute, he’s so ready. Alex is proud too, the idea of someone listening to George’s heart and him getting to watch them do it is a bit exciting too. Logan might be a little nervous but George is as calm as they come. They’re all used to having their hearts studied and listened to. Alex will start him just in the center of George’s chest, not a real auscultation point, just a place to start, and let him experiment from there.”

So I made him experiment from there: “He is, he couldn’t wait for this since they talked about surprising Logan. ❤

Alex is so proud, he loves seeing how close George and Logan are to each other, it really warms his heart, and he’s proud of them, of George for being the amazing person he is, doing everything for Logan he can, and of Logan too, for being open about what he likes and how it helps him. They have a beautiful platonic relationship and Alex is glad he can witness moments of it and he can sometimes be a part of it, helping both of them to make their experiences even more amazing.

And he loves seeing how much healthier Logan looks since he left Formula 1 and moved back to America to be close to his friends and family. He smiles a lot and he’s more energetic since then, and he doesn’t have as many panic attacks and bad days as he used to have. So he’s definitely made good progress.

George is calm, he’s smiling softly, his breathing is calm and even, waiting for Logan to start when he feels ready. And then he feels the stethoscope in the center of his chest and he closes his eyes for a moment so Logan won’t feel like he’s being watched.

Logan’s first reaction is a simple ‘woow’ as the chest piece touches George’s skin. The heartbeat he hears is so loud and powerful. It’s incredible.

‘Can you hear it?’ Alex asks to make sure everything works well. ‘It... It’s so loud. Woow.’

‘Yeah, it’s a bit different than listening to it with your ear. If you listen closely, you can hear the valves open and close, the blood whooshing through them. If you move the chest piece around his left pecs, you’ll find the auscultation points, those are what doctors use when they listen to the heart. They all sound a bit different, feel free to try them.’

I love that George is just there, totally relaxed, eyes closed, waiting to be listened to, and Alex is like a good teacher, explaining things to Logan, gently guiding him. Their relationship is also a really special one. Different from George and Logan’s but just as special and that’s why the three of them work so well together. ❤”

And then my friend went into the auscultation part a bit: “Logan being so curious as he moves them around. ‘I know you’ve named them for me before but I don’t remember them. Can you tell me what I’m listening to?’ And just VERY curious about every single ‘different’ sound there is.

Like why is the mitral valve so tiny? But the aortic valve is so deep and thumpy? Why can he hear blood flow better in some valves than others? A very curious little guy.

Alex being there to answer all questions and correct positioning with the stethoscope. Instructing George to sometimes lie on his side, raise his arm up, ect ect all sorts of things doctors do to check for murmurs and certain conditions. Just so Logan can hear.”

“And after Alex has explained everything, Logan just sits there in front of George, listening to all the points over again and tries to name them by himself, with Alex nodding proudly every time.

‘George’s gonna fall asleep soon,’ Alex slaps on George’s thigh to wake him up, receiving an elbow into his upper arm, making all three of them laugh.

‘I was just enjoying the thorough examination, Alex,’ he pretends to be angry but he can’t, ‘But now you took me out of the zone.’

‘It’s okay,’ Logan says, taking the earpieces out and putting the stethoscope down. ‘Thank you so much for letting me try it on you, it’s an amazing instrument and your heart sound beautiful.’”

So this was Logan’s first stething experience, and after this I started thinking about whether he’d want to listen to his own heart. “I’m not sure, but I imagined this night as they’d tell Logan to stay with them for the night, he can cuddle with George, sleep between them, like good, old times.

And maybe at night he couldn’t fall asleep. Alex next to him would already be asleep, Logan guesses George too, but George isn’t. He’d notice that Logan is still up and ask him what’s going on, why he can’t sleep. And Logan would tell him, he doesn’t know, he just can’t. This whole day was amazing and he can’t just let it go. He feels a bit strange, his heart is a bit too fast and he feels those strong beats that can't let him fall asleep.

And then I think George would offer him to use the stethoscope on himself and if he likes it, he can buy one, too, and use it when he needs it, when George’s heartbeat doesn’t help or he simply just needs something else, a different grounding method. And then Logan would lie on his back, earpieces in his ears, chest piece on his chest, listening to his own heart while George pets his head to comfort him. And with George being there, taking care of him, his heart would slowly calm down.”

After this my friend mentioned how important it is for Logan to familiarize himself with his own little heart and understand its importance and then his heart can help him calm himself down. “There is something so inherently calming about feeling your own heartbeat come down from a rush. Like, it’s one of the most calming things.”

And then she asked if Logan would offer his heart to George at some point as a ‘thank you’, so I started thinking about it and this was my answer: “I think after his heart has calmed down, he asks George if he wants to have a listen. He knows George doesn’t really do that, it’s Alex who sometimes listens to him, but Logan still wants to ask because it feels right, after all the things George has done for him. A bit of listening might not mean much to George, he thinks, but he gets proved wrong when he sees George’s excited face. George never really thought about this, for him the most important was always Alex and Logan and making them happy with letting them listen, him listening was a bit rare. Ear stething not much, but with a stethoscope it was. He prefers cuddles and ear on chest, but when Logan offers, he can’t say no. For some reason it feels like a really big thing for him, Logan getting so comfortable with him that he lets George listen to his heart. Alex is his boyfriend, that's normal that he lets him, but Logan... That’s a totally different thing. Especially that in the beginning Logan didn’t really care about his own heart but then George's helped him discover it.” (Yeah, again a bit of a contradiction to the beginning, sorry. As I mentioned after another quote above, Logan originally didn’t really care about his own heart in the beginning.)

“Logan is probably a little surprised that george accepts, but George is a naturally curious person. Logan knows his heart inside and out, maybe he can give Logan a listen and see if he can get to know it just as well. He already knows Alex’s better than anyone EVER could, doctors be damned. Alex himself be damned.

So he closes his eyes and he listens hard. Very intent listening, very attentive, moving the steth around a few times, taking a listen to all the valves, listening for murmurs or anything of the like, nope, completely and totally perfect. Strong, steady, valves sound very strong and the turbulent blood is just barely audible as it should be.

He would smile at Logan. ‘Wow, quite healthy, that. Not that I'm at all surprised - but it’s nice to confirm for myself. Your heart sounds absolutely lovely.’”

“And Logan just shyly murmurs a ‘thank you’ because he doesn’t really know what to say because besides doctors, nobody ever listened to his heart before. So it’s a really new situation. But then he adds ‘I always do my cardio. I’d never dare to say no to Elias,’ he says jokingly, ‘But it was originally Benny who taught me the importance of it. And he made me start liking working out. I miss him sometimes, especially the workouts we did together. He always motivated me. Elias is nice, too, we get on well, but he’s different.’

George puts the stethoscope on the nightstand and settles down next to Logan. ‘It’s hard when you have to change trainers after working together for years. But I’m sure if Benny has time, he’d be happy to meet you for a workout and a nice conversation about both of your lives, days since you stopped working together. Sometimes it’s nice to meet when you don’t see someone for a while, you know, to catch up.’

‘I’ll text him and ask, thank you. It already helps a lot that we could meet, I’m sure meeting with him, too, would be the cherry on top.’

‘I’m sure he’ll make it happen. But now come here and sleep,’ he offers Logan his chest to snuggle, ‘It’s getting late.’ Logan snuggles into his chest.

‘Sorry I kept you up.’

‘It's okay, I'm glad we could talk and listen to your heart. I hope now you’ll fall asleep easier.’

‘I'm sure I will,’ Logan says, eyes already closed. ‘Sleep well, George.’

‘You too, Logan.’ And George puts his hand on Logan’s back to pet him until they both fall asleep.”

In the next morning, Alex offers Logan to listen to his heart to give him the full experience.

“While sitting on the bed, waiting for Logan to fully wake up, Alex would be like: “How’s your heart?”

And then Logan, surprised but really awake after hearing this unexpected question, ‘My heart? Uh, it's fine, I guess. I mean…’

‘Don't worry,’ Alex touches his upper arm, ‘I’m just asking because we talked about George’s a lot but not much about yours, and while George told me he listened to it at night, he couldn’t give you the full experience because he doesn’t know that much about it. So we thought I could give you a check up, talk you through it as I listen to your valves, things like that. Anything you want, but only if you want to. No pressure.’”

“Logan is probably a bit self conscious at first. Having all of the attention on his own heart is a bit embarrassing and overwhelming, but he would eventually agree to it.

‘Yeah - I - okay, that’s fine.” he’s just a bit nervous about it, still not used to being the one in the spotlight.”

And this is the point where talking about boundaries came in the picture because how Alex started this was probably not the most ideal.

“And I think this would be a good opportunity to talk about boundaries and things like that. Alex telling him that he can say no if he wants to (even when they’re already doing it), Alex and George take ‘no’ really seriously and won’t push anything if it’s too much for Logan. They don’t want to force him into anything, and it’s totally understandable if it’s a lot now because they’ve done a few different things yesterday that were new to him and it’s okay if he needs time and doesn’t want another experience today. Alex is really, really patient with him when he explains it because he knows for him it’s not really new anymore, giving check ups to George, making recordings, things like that, but for Logan it’s really, really new and he has to be patient, go slowly with everything he wants to show him. Logan agrees to do it but Alex tells him they’ll do it after breakfast, so it won’t be a pretty shocking thing right after waking up and Logan has time to think about it and ask questions if he has any.

After the breakfast Logan tells Alex that he still wants him to do the check up and shyly asks him if he could like, somehow show or explain to him how to listen to his own heart, where to put the chest piece on himself, what he’s hearing on those points and things like that. He isn’t sure if Alex understands what he means but it’s not easy for him to explain it because it’s all new and a bit scary to open up about it because it’s his heart and it’s really different to just listening to George’s heart. Now he wants to understand hearts. And he knows Alex is the best person to help with it.

George almost melts as he witnesses Logan telling this to Alex while Alex holds his hands and listens to him attentively. George understands what Logan means, and he knows Alex understands it, too.

When Logan finishes explaining, Alex nods and tells him how they’ll do it. First Alex listens to a point, explains what he hears, then gives the stethoscope to Logan and lets him listen and ask, if he has any questions. And this is how they check every auscultation point, slowly, not rushing anything. George’s heart fills with so much love as he watches them from afar not to bother the moment. He knows Alex is gentle but seeing him being gentle with other people, paying attention to their signs, how they want to do things, everything, makes him so happy and he feels so lucky to have a partner like him.”

Logan gets to learn so many things about his heart and with Ale’s help he even finds his favorite auscultation point on himself. And by the end, he gains enough confidence to straight up ask if he could hear Alex’s heart, too.

“Alex jokes with him about secretly waiting for this moment because he was jealous of George getting all the listening and attention. And then George from the other side of the room: ‘He’s lying, he doesn’t even like attention. He loves giving it, hates receiving it. Don’t feel bad, Logan.’

‘I've been exposed,’ Alex laughs as he takes off his t-shirt. ‘But he’s right, I prefer giving it and not receiving, but I’d love it if you listened to mine, too, and told me what you think. Would that be okay for you?’

‘Of course,’ Logan nods, ‘I'll try and use everything you’ve taught me.’

‘Don’t feel pressured to do it. Just enjoy, it’s not a med school exam or anything like that. I won’t ask questions about it, only maybe about your feelings and thoughts. If you want to talk about it.’

‘Okay,’ Logan smiles and puts the earpieces in, and then the chest piece on Alex's chest to discover his heart too.’”

And here we talked about Alex’s heartbeat a bit with my friend saying: “Alex probably has one of the BEST hearts to listen to if I’m honest. I bet it’s SO soft and so gentle and so slow.

So easy to fall asleep to, or be calmed by. It fits his personality so much.

Alex gets comfortable, too, he’s used to George listening here and there so it’s easy for him to just forget the stethoscope is even there. Takes steady, even breaths, and just lets Logan listen.”

And I said this: “Yeah, and it’s so overlooked most of the time because out of the two of them, George is the more physical, he lets people close quicker, comforts people with hugs and cuddles while Alex does it with words and maybe pets. He needs more time to let people close, to feel safe to do it. But now that he lets Logan close enough, Logan does his best to give some attention to his heart and use all the things he learnt from Alex. He wants to make Alex proud.

He’s really surprised how different Alex’s heart is compared to George’s. It’s still a heart, a really healthy one, just like George’s, but it’s still different. Good different.

He lets Logan take his time with listening to each point, going back to some of them he really likes or wants to compare. Logan doesn’t talk but Alex doesn’t mind it because George doesn’t usually talk during it either. So it’s not surprising, he likes when people get lost in their thoughts while listening to his heartbeat because it shows that they enjoy doing it. And that’s what’s the most important for him.

Seeing the soft smile on Alex’s face means everything to him. And when Logan starts telling him things about what he hears and they start talking about Alex’s heart, George feels so happy because Logan’s learnt so much and he sees how proud Alex is of him. These last two days are really two of the best days of their lives. Everything’s just so perfect.

Logan loves Alex’s heartbeat. It’s so soothing. It’s so Alex. He can’t really explain it, he just feels it. Hears it. And knows it.

After Logan’s finished listening, he asks Alex if he can put his hand on his chest. He’s a bit scared that it’s too much but Alex nods in a heartbeat without hesitation. But he’s verbal about it, too, to make sure. “Of course you can, Logan.” Logan thanks him and gently lays his hand on the center of Alex’s chest and closes his eyes to see if he can feel it. A few seconds later he feels Alex move his hand a bit. ‘Don’t worry, I’m just putting it to the spot where you can actually feel it, because I don’t think the center is the most perfect place for that,’ he explains and when he finds the spot, he presses Logans hand there, with the boy's fingers being exactly on the spot, feeling the powerful muscle rhythmically contracting under the skin.

George’s having a hard time not to get too emotional about this whole chest touching thing, especially when Alex moves Logan’s hand to the spot. The spot he uses to help George calm down when he needs it. The spot only George knew about until now. This is the moment when George knows Alex’s reached the point where he feels safe enough to let Logan be as close to him physically as he can. And it’s a really big thing for all of them.” (The spot is the apex/point of maximal impulse at the fifth intercostal space.)

To this, my friend replied with this: “I like how it’s kind of - Alex is this soft sweet thing so eager to help and support others but he’s actually quite reserved letting others in for himself

and somehow Logan has broken through that and that’s why George gets so riled up about it. He is theirs, for sure. Unbreakable bond between those three.”

“He’s like, ‘well, if you want it, you’ll get it, there’s no reason not to show it, really’, because seeing that Logan really cares about his heart made him realize that he’s just as much part of this as George is. He was never jealous of what George and Logan have, but he knew that they’re closer/it’s a bit more special to them. But Logan showed him that their relationship is just as special. It’s different but that’s why it’s also special. George is his comfort person, he gets the best hugs and cuddles from him, but Alex... Alex is an amazing teacher and the way he talks about hearts (and basically everything else) is amazes Logan and he loves talking with Alex, loves learning from him and loves the support and guidance he gets from him. He really appreciates that George and Alex are this different because they fit together perfectly and the different ways they comfort Logan always makes him feel safe and loved because they always have a solution, no matter what the situation is. If he needs hugs, he gets hugs, if he needs someone to talk to, then he has someone to talk to. It’s so perfect and he’s really glad he has them in his life.

Alex’s really sweet and loves to help and support but needs time to actually let people close because he needs to make sure he won’t regret it and the relationship is close (and strong) enough to do it. But once he does it, being a friend of his becomes a whole new experience. It’s nice without the physical stuff too, but with that it’s just simply amazing. He doesn’t do this with any other people besides George but Logan deserves it because he’s part of their little family of some sort. Because by now it’s more than just a friendship. It’s an unbreakable bond, just like you said.”

So yes, this is the point where their relationship becomes something special, something more than just a friendship. Their friendship has grown into something beautiful.

“A sweet thing, kind of an ending for their day, is that when it’s time to say goodbye at the airport and George hugs Logan, it’s a bit more emotional than they planned and they’re both crying, and George tells him that he doesn’t have to wait as much until their next meeting as he had to for this one. They’ll come back soon and spend more time with him and when he has time he can also go to their apartment and spend time with them there, he’s always welcome, he just has to call/text to let them know he wants to visit them. And by the end of saying goodbye, George’s voice is so thin that to the outsiders it looks like a really, really sad and painful moment, when in reality it’s not, it’s just... They just made their bond even stronger and now it’s difficult to say goodbye. But it’s not for forever, only for a few weeks, a month at most, if everything goes well.

Seeing how broken they are, Alex decides to hug the two of them. One big, big, big hug to comfort them. He didn’t plan to be emotional but he is now. These two days have taught him so much and he’s so grateful to have these two amazing people in his life. In the beginning, he didn't think they'd have this strong relationship with Logan, and now they’re there, crying at the airport, not wanting to let go of each other. But they have to, slowly. When they finally let go of each other, they’re smiling as they’re waving, because they know that the distance doesn’t matter, this relationship can and will survive everything. And it’s not like they can’t meet pretty frequently or at least have phone/video calls and change texts until they get to see each other in person again. They try to find the positives as they part ways for a while.

Until the next meeting. Which will be when they surprise Logan on his birthday with a stethoscope customized especially for him. ❤”

My friend’s reaction to it: “They love each other so much omg. I bet Logan is over the moon when he opens up his gift and it’s a customized stethoscope sobs he’s like ‘they can’t possibly GET better and then there they go, getting better anyway!’

That is so sweet. I love the love, it’s so good and happy and pure.”

This was the point when I told my friend I almost started crying like them. This story has grown on me so easily. It’s so important to me, and what’s the best in it is that this is not the end, there’s more to come, because yeah, they surprised him with a customized stethoscope.

“Logan’s over the moon, because he doesn’t expect it. He mentioned to them that he was thinking about buying one but he wasn’t sure about it because he still listens to George’s (and Alex’s) heartbeat recordings more than he wants to listen to his own heart but sometimes he really wants to and for those times it’d be nice to have one.

But they told him they’d talk about it in person and help him choose if he really wanted one. But then when they meet, there’s a box. With a stethoscope in it. And he can’t believe it. He can’t believe that these two love him this much even if he doesn’t do anything extra, he just tries to be happy and enjoy life and racing. He couldn’t wish for better people to be his found family. ❤”

After this I told her that we both knew how they spend the night now that they have two stethoscopes. “Imagine them both stething Alex. The person that hates attention and who’s really not used to his two favorite people caring about his heart at the same time.”

“If Alex’s being honest, he enjoys it because he trusts both of them and he deserves a bit of heart appreciation too. And they take really good care of him, all beats tracked, heart sounds checked, everything’s perfect. What an amazing way to spend Logan’s birthday and New Year’s Eve. The three of them together, stething each other, taking breaks to eat cake and drink champagne. Totally a dream come true for all three of them. No party could be better than this.”

This is where we ended the story, but then a few days later we brought it up again because my friend said that they work so well together that she could even imagine them in a romantic polyamorous relationship. The fact that she said this made me so happy I instantly jumped on the polyam Logan/George/Alex train.

“Their romantic relationship would start with an accidental “I love you” from Logan to George after an emotionally (and maybe physically, too) difficult moment while he’s in George’s arms, being comforted. And when he realizes it, he’d run away (maybe to the bathroom or something) because of being too scared of what George (and Alex, oh my god) would think/say. But Alex would be quick enough to catch him before he’d close the bathroom door.

‘Hey, Logan, wait,’ Alex catches the boy’s hand, not letting him run into the bathroom. ‘S-sorry, oh my god, I'm so s-sorry.’ Logan’s shaking, his voice is trembling and he’s crying. His breathing is irregular, he gasps for air but it just makes the situation worse because he doesn’t actually get air into his lungs.

‘Hey, breathe,’ Alex instructs him as they sit down in front of the bathroom door, ‘It's okay, Logan. It’s okay,’ he tries to make eye contact with Logan but it’s not easy, ‘You did nothing wrong. Nothing. You have to calm down, okay? So then we can talk.’

And when George realizes what’s happening, he runs after them and when he sees Logan hugging himself, he wants to run and hug him and tell him it’s okay, everything’s going to be okay. But Alex stops him. ‘Don’t,’ he touches George’s leg, ‘I know you want to help but maybe it’s better to try it from here, mhm? Maybe touching him would only make it worse now.’

‘Yeah, okay,’ George nods and sits down and watches Alex trying to help Logan. It’s really difficult to just sit there and not do anything when Logan’s clearly panicking. But he trusts Alex. He has helped George a lot, he knows what he’s doing. And maybe his method is better in this situation.”

Logan feels like he’s going to die. It’s too much and he’s scared and can’t breathe and he can’t make himself smaller and just disappear.

“‘Logan, can you hear me?’ Alex asks, ‘You have to sit up straight or lie down on the floor or something, anything that doesn’t restrict your lungs, okay? We’re going to try and breathe together.’”

“Logan seeing George behind Alex sort of makes his heart clench up too, oh god, George is going to be so furious --- But Alex gets his attention. It takes him time before he would be able to reply, but he does hear Alex. ‘Uh…’ he will lie down. Scrambling further away from Alex, as far away into the bathroom he can get. And then he will lay down. ‘Yeah, okay. Okay.’ But god, his heart is racing so fast he feels it in his throat, like he's swallowing it down.’”

“‘Good job,’ Alex said, trying to concentrate on Logan while holding George’s hand to keep him as calm as possible. ‘Okay, now I’m going to start counting to help you calm your breathing down, please try and follow me. I’m going to tell you what to do at each step.’

And when Alex starts counting for Logan, George starts doing the breathing technique, too. He needs it, he needs to stop the panic before it gets stronger. Luckily Alex’s calm voice helps, as always. He hopes it’ll help Logan, too, because it breaks George’s heart to see him like that, so far away, struggling with breathing. He wishes he could hold him and tell him he loves him, too.”

And now not only Logan’s suffering but George, too. Poor Alex, one’s here, one’s there, but fortunately George can deal with it pretty well so Alex can put the focus on Logan. It’s pretty scary for George because he’s seen Logan panic a few times, they’ve gone through difficult situations together but he’s never seen him like this before.

“Alex’s got this. He’s good at this. He’s got George’s hand so he can put his thumb on George’s wrist and feel his pulse, know where he is in the panic… If he's calming down, ect. And he does calm down! Enough so that Alex doesn’t feel like he needs to monitor George anymore.

Logan tries his best to follow the counting that Alex does, but it takes a few tries before he gets it right. He’s just worried that he’s ruined everything. The one good thing he has had in years…”

“When George starts feeling better, he starts thinking about what to say to Logan when he’s okay, too. He wants to show him that he’s loved and he has no reason to be scared of them, no matter what he says.

‘Water,’ George whispers to Alex after a while, meaning he’ll go and get a glass of water for Logan for when he’s better. Alex nods and turns back to Logan. ‘You’re doing a great job,’ Alex says, ‘Can you feel your heart slowing down as you start breathing more regularly? Your lungs and heart work together, if you start breathing faster, your heart will also start beating faster. To help slow it down, the best thing you can do is to take some deep breaths. It’s not easy in the beginning but if you keep going, you’ll see the result. I can already see it.’

Logan closes his eyes and tries to keep doing the breathing. It slowly keeps getting easier, he can feel his heart slowing down beneath his palm as his lungs expand more easily. He can’t really speak yet but Alex tells him he doesn’t have to, he just talks to let him know he’s there and to provide an even and calming voice he can hold on to.

‘Here’s the water,’ George says when he’s back.

‘Thank you,’ Alex says with a soft smile on his face, proud of his boyfriend for wanting to help a minute after fighting with his own panic. ‘He’s getting better but we have to give him time. No running there and hugging, only when he’s asking for it or shows signs that he wants it. Okay?’

‘Okay.’”

“Logan feeling his heart slow down helps him feel like he’s going to be okay. He doesn’t feel like he's dying. He can think more clearly. Alex is helping more than he probably even realizes.

Logan being brave enough to finally look over at Alex and make eye contact.”

“George leaves them alone because he knows it’s better for Logan to be with Alex now, he helps him more than George’s presence.

Alex looks straight into Logan's eyes but he doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t move, he doesn’t talk, he just holds the glass in his hand, ready to give it to Logan when he asks for it. He’s glad Logan’s better now.

‘Is George angry?’ is the first thing Logan asks, still lying on the ground, wanting to sit up but not having enough energy. ‘I remember him being with you but now I can’t see him…’”

“‘No, no, he’s not angry.’ Alex is quick to do some damage control on that. ‘H’'s worried about you, but there wasn’t much he could do to help you, so he’s waiting until you feel better.’ Softly smiles at Logan, gestures down at the water. ‘I can leave this in the middle of the room for you if you want it?’”

“‘I’m sorry,’ he says, taking a deep breath not to start crying again. ‘Please,’ he says when Alex mentions the water, ‘I feel thirsty. And tired.’

‘You don't have to apologize. We’ll talk when you’re ready,’ Alex puts the glass in the middle of the room, ‘It's normal to feel tired, panic attacks drain the energy. If you want to, you can sleep in our bed, it’d help.’

‘Thank you,’ Logan sits up to get the water and drinks a few sips, ‘I don't want to sleep. Not until... Until we’ve talked.’

‘We can talk now if that’s what you want,’ Alex offers. Logan nods. ‘Can... Can George come here?’ Logan asks, shyly, ‘I'm... I'm a bit scared but I want to apologize. For... For what I said. For this whole thing. For this whole day. I’m a mess today and you two have been so nice to me, helping everywhere and here I am, messing up everything because I’m stupid and can’t keep my mouth shut…’”

Logan really needs some slow, really gentle touches after some talking (for him to know that they still love him, and they love him that way, too, and they’re still the same people, they’re still safe to be close to), plus a lot of patience, love, comfort and a nice chest to snuggle to and fall asleep on. Slowly we’ll get there.

“‘I’ll bring him over, of course.’ Alex snaps to get George’s attention, and then gestures for him to come over. George would slowly make his way over, and sit next to Alex. He immediately smiles at Logan, hoping it’ll calm him a bit.

‘Hi Logan.’ he says, and he leaves it at that. He doesn’t want to startle the poor boy after all this. Alex takes a deep breath, and gives the floor to Logan. ‘Whenever you're ready, at your own pace, okay?’”

“‘Thank you,’ Logan murmurs and waits for George to arrive. When he does, he sits in the corner of the room, far enough from Logan not to scare him.

Logan nods to Alex and then looks at his hands on his lap, trying to find out how to start. But then he starts without any plans because he doesn’t want to make them wait for too long.

‘I—I’d like to apologize,’ he starts and George immediately wants to cut in but Alex stops him. ‘For... For this whole day. For crying earlier, for the panic attack now, and for... For saying I love you. I—I don’t… want to apologize for… for loving you, I can’t control that. But I want to apologize for saying it. I should’ve kept it to myself. You two are in a happy monogamous relationship and I should’ve respected it. But I did not, and I’m really sorry about it and I hope that I didn’t mess up our relationship with it forever. I really hope so. Because... Because I love what we have and I don’t want you to feel like I want more and it’s not enough. It is, you make me happy, having you in my life is already more than what I imagined. I…’ he sighs and looks at George and then at Alex, ‘I don’t even know what I want to say. But I guess I just want to apologize and I hope... I hope I won’t lose you. But I understand if I’ve crossed a boundary with this. I think... I think this is all I wanted to say. Oh and thank you for the help. You’ve helped me so many times. I can’t be grateful enough. Thank you.’

George looks at Alex and then waits for a few seconds to see if Logan wants to add something else. When he stays silent and Alex nods, George opens his mouth and says, ‘I love you, Logan.’

It makes Logan smile. ‘You're so nice. But... For me it’s... A bit of a different kind of love. You don’t love me that way and it’s okay.’

‘We do, Logan,’ Alex says, ‘We love you. That way. We’ve been wanting to talk about it for some time now but we wanted to wait for the right time. We didn’t want it to have to talk about it like this, but now that we’re here, there’s no reason to keep it secret. We love you. We’re in love with you, Logan. Both of us.’”

“Logan just sort of chuckling in disbelief. ‘Right, of course you are.’ and laying back against the wall of the bathroom, hitting his head back against the wall. ‘Jesus christ, I can wake up at any moment now.’

And George is incessant. ‘Logan, we mean it. I know it’s probably quite a shock but it’s true. I know the timing is a bit muddled up, but…’

And then Logan sort of looks back over at them, studying them. Still a bit in disbelief but he swallows harshly.

‘It's not a sick joke?’

Alex frowning, ‘we would never do that to you, I promise.’ And then he just sort of goes boneless. Big relieved sigh.

‘You love me? Both of you?’

‘Both of us,’ George confirms. And then Logan sort of laughs this breathy soft little laugh and crawls back over to them.”

“He crawls back over to them and pulls them close to himself for a group hug, trying not to cry, this time from relief. They’re in love with him.

‘I could’ve spared this panic attack, I guess,’ he jokes as George pulls him to his chest and he closes his eyes for a moment as Alex rests his hand on Logan’s back. “Sorry about it.’”

“‘Don’t be sorry, how were you supposed to know?’ George is so soft and earnest, giving Logan the biggest hug ever. ‘I'm just sorry you had to suffer through it. I hate seeing you so scared.’

And it's true, seeing Logan well and truly frightened like that, it’s… It’s just awful.”

“‘Yeah,’ he sighs, ‘You’re right.’

‘We should go back to the bedroom, the bed is more comfortable than the ground in the bathroom.’

‘Can we cuddle there?’

‘Of course,’ George says, hinting a kiss on Logan’s hair. “You can take a nap on my chest. Or on Alex’s. Would that help?’”

Here I sent a pic of George’s hair almost forming a heart shape, and then I incorporated it in my reply:

“‘Your hair,’ Logan’s eyes light up when they sit down on the bed and he notices George’s hair, ‘It's almost— Can I?’ he asks, gesturing towards George’s hair.

‘Of course,’ George smiles, not really knowing what to expect as he feels Logan’s hands on his hair.

‘Now it’s perfect heart. A just had to put the ends closer,’ he explains with a satisfied smile on his face.

‘Aww,’ George pulls him closer to kiss his forehead while Alex grabs his phone to take a pic of the moment. It’s going to be his new wallpaper. George’s heart shaped hair and him kissing Logan, a moment from the beginning of a new chapter in their relationship.”

The End

And this is it, the story of the really special and beautiful relationship Logan, George and Alex have in me and my friend’s universe. ❤

Thank you so much for letting me talk about it, and if you see this here, then thank you so much for reading this. If you stayed here through a bit more than 10K words, I hope you liked reading this and getting to know these three amazing people and a few moments of their relationship. They’re really special to me. I hope there will be some people who’ll think the same because I think Logan/George/Alex is a beautiful polyam couple.

Also, if you’re still here and still interested in this universe, me and my friend have also talked about another story in this universe where Alex gets a fever and Logan’s the one who’s at home with him and he has to deal with Alex being sick alone, for the first time since they’ve been in a relationship. It’s much shorter than this, around 2K right now in the document but it has all of our unrelated little messages, too, so it’ll be even shorter when I delete everything that’s not the story. If you’d like to read that, too, send an ask. ❤

Also, I’m open to talk about this universe, hear people’s thoughts, headcanons or anything about it. I love reading people’s thoughts about my stories so if this has given you any little idea or anything, don’t be afraid to share it with me. ❤

Have a nice day/night. ❤

#yep this is basically full on cardiophilia. but at least it's the cute/soft version. 😃#lorge #sargebon #logan sargeant #george russell #alex albon #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 #logan/george/alex #my writing #answered asks #kingfisherprince #heart things #logalex

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