#it feels more real and more powerful u kno?

[mike-haters-dni]

So while I'm Saying Shit, I also have a problem with this idea that El was upset that Mike wasn't saying I love you specifically because her love language is words of affirmation so she really needed to hear it? I mean, first of all I think the idea of love languages is mostly useful as a quick generalized way to discuss how we respond to and express affection—a messy nuanced human behavior thing that is hard to talk about, and the show is written with that nuance, but even then I don't think El particularly craves or requires words to feel loved anymore than anyone else does. I think in s4 she was really just confused about why her boyfriend was refusing to say the word 'love' under any circumstance to her? Especially after she heard him say it once already and then she said it back to his face in response so its like, he said he loves me before and I let him know I feel the same and now he won't say it again? Not even as a way to end letters—a normal thing people do for someone who means much less to them than she supposedly does to him sooooooooooo like what's the fucking deal? The contents of the letters sure implies he holds a lot of affection for her and he brings her flowers in her favorite colors and ok we're in love and then he signs 'from' on the card and its like ????? like even as the audience you're supposed to be confused lol like he clearly has some kind of hang up I wonder what it is? Then after El smashes a girl's face in she thinks "oh yeah, the hang up is that he actually hates me because I'm evil haha lemme just start projecting real quick" and then, you know, s4 happens. I mean, it's not like she doesn't value words at all, I just don't think her relationship to them is particularly tied to her trauma like people say, or if anything, maybe she values them less because that's all Brenner would ever give her? Like, perhaps the big Love Confession hits the hardest because it came after Mike and company spent a week or whatever driving across the entire western united states to save her from the government. Idk, something to chew on.

Honestly, if anyone's love language is words its Mike lmao he's the one whos constantly telling El how amazing she is. He's also desperately trying to tell her he loves her in like 5 scenes (arguably succeeding except for not saying the actual word in most of them) before he actually does like, he wants to so bad it almost comes spilling out of his mouth against his will (except for that one time it does ha) he's just terrified of doing so because it would essentially be ripping his entire beating heart out of his chest and handing it to this powerful-in-every-way girl on a silver platter for her to do whatever she wants with—like crushing it into a fine paste in front of his eyes, killing him instantly and preventing him from having the strength to love anything ever again. Like, the other half of the love language thing is that you also speak the love language, meaning you are more likely to show affection by doing the thing you want for other people, and Mike does this waaaaay more than El does for anyone actually (something I would love to see her do more in s5 lowkey. Like, she was at a severe disadvantage before and was too busy dealing with her own shit to have a ton of emotional energy for anyone else so it makes sense, but we're matured now. I think now is the time for a heart-to-heart that goes both ways u kno).

If I wanted to be cute, I could argue that both Mike and El's main love language is actually acts of service. They're both little heroes who jump at the chance to do anything for the people they love with no regard for their own personal wellbeing. Also, adorably, the thing that gets them back together in s3 is Mike saving El from Billy, which El responds to by helping him and Lucas with the vending machine. One offering of m&ms later and we're back baybee it's the quiet understanding that no matter what they'll always be there for each other for meeee

If I'm not being cute I'm saying the idea that everyone has a main 'love language' is bullshit and you're gonna appreciate different things at different times and people are not that easily categorized but it's still a good jumping off point for discussion so—

Anyway El saves the world and Mike saves her and they're dying in each other's arms thank you for your time <3

[dogpixie]

being forced to quit weed for this has been 1 of the biggest double blessings of my whole life. im sure most of u whov followed me for a long time kno i smoked everyday, usually thruout the day, for over 11 years. and came to resent it. i tried to quit sm times, literally went to a program for it b4 and couldnt shake it for more than a week. i kno they say weed isnt that serious but i was legit addicted to the shit, i felt like its hostage. itd often make my anxiety way worse but bc every1 talks up how its calming id be like "yea sure, i agree. i like it bc its calming." bullshit i just liked being high and numb. i prefered being half present and i didnt care enough abt my health or myself in general to give it up for me. but now that i havnt smoked weed for just over a month im so fucking happy. i for real dont even miss it!!!!! i definitely missed it at first but obv bc there was no way i was going to expose my developing baby to that shit i was able to just not even consider it, i flipped the option off like a switch. and now that im here ive decided im never going back. id be a damn fool to. like any recovering addict im never touching that shit again. maybe ill eat edibles on special occasions bc i think i can easily control that, i never was hype abt that high like i was the instant, ritualistic act of smoking. but yea, no smoking and no vaping. any way i kno its different if u dont have something forcing u to quit like i did but i want to encourage any1 who also struggles with this to really try to kick the habit. i thought id be a stoner for life, it was so engrained in me but im reborn lmao and it feels so so powerful and awesome. being stoned cant compare to clarity and to the power of knowing u have absolute control over urself and ur urges. fuck that shit forever!!!!

[dballzposting]

do u ever think abt how like trunks was probably raised by the internet growing up. bc yknow his parents werent ever really there. its interesting cause like he probably just kinda had to yet up on his own legs when his parents werent there and kinda worked his way around things, he likely got it from bulma, the problem solving that is. because he definitely didn't from vegeta. i like to imagine when trunks and goten were basically old enough to kinda make friends with eachother, which was when they were probably like 8, goten looked up to trunks a lot because he was older than him and like so cool his mom was really rich and trunks' dad would fight his dad and that was cool. from trunks perspective i feel like he kinda realized that goten was like kinda stupidly smart, trunks was too but he'd rather do other things and was like "yo this kid can do my homework for me" because trunks never really considered people for just being people at first because he wanted to try to live up to his who whenever visted dad would just huff at him and get what he came for. never really paying attention to trunks. i feel like after awhile of getting to knos goten better he kinda started like actually playing with him-- like a real kid, yknow? he let goten on his xbox and they woulc play zombies and goten was always so fascinated because his mom never allowed him any type of electronic devices or access to the internet. all goten had were books and whatever happened outside and sometimes even dvds he could play. i feel like they idolized eachother but never realized the other one felt the same way, and then as they grew up they kinda rubbed off on eachother

Trunks was definitely encouraged to explore and figure things out on his own for sure !! This of course also meant that he went out and found his own culture and place in it outside of the context of his house. Maybe that meant becoming a minecraft youtuber. What of it

Maybe a feeling of culture & connection was absent at home if his dad never wanted to connect with him, just train him. That makes sense that Trunks would inhabit that attitude and treat others like a commodity as well. I definitely see in him a kid who is bumbling through and trying to emulate what he's shown - but underneath that is an energetic and spontaneous child who is just having trouble making sense of conflicting inputs about the world, is all!

Goten's view of the world and his place in it was never that mysterious and contentious however so he's pretty well-adjusted I think. He's comfortable being the baby and looking up to Trunks and trusting that he knows what he's talking about. But he won't hesitate to defend his own mind or skin when it comes down to it. And Goten's authenticity rubs off on Trunks a bit, or rather encourages Trunks to just be himself. On one hand, Trunks lied when he said that he knew what a Majin Buu was because Goten seemed to believe that Trunks would know; but on the other hand, Trunks didn't try to push his competence further when he admitted that he too couldn't make sense of the high power levels they were sensing during their mad-flight over there. Rank matters to Trunks, and Goten is quick to assume his role as the youngest, but they are also quickly approaching an equilibrium.

i feel like they idolized eachother but never realized the other one felt the same way, and then as they grew up they kinda rubbed off on eachother

^ All There is To It Gang . . . . Goten looked up to Trunks becasue he was so skilled and knowledgeable and Trunks looked up to Goten becasue he was so fucking weird I MEAN he was trusting and playful and bold and he adapted fast and wasn't ever ashamed of who he was.

THEY ARE FRIENDS YOUR HONOR.

Trunks comes into a lot of grace to be able to stop the implicit power struggle and admit equals with Goten. It's more rewarding, but it does require a humbling, and perhaps a painful rejection of his nuanceless-because-he's-still-just-a-kid understanding of that all-important pride, which is like a religious doctrine in his home. Of course he could have Saiyan Pride AND a best friend, and actually it does seem like he understands that (in the Kakarot sidequest that these screenshots are from, Trunks and Goten had been of the belief that Vegeta and Goku were friends), but . . . who knows. Worth thinking about.

[clamsjams]

If you’re chill with people in your ask box sharing theories /if not you can ignore this ^^/. My personal theory about Maximus is that he’s not secretly working for the federation or anything, the federation just needed him to either 1: cause unrest and distrust among the order group since he was one of the forming members of it 2: they needed to test a small experiment with him, 3 he could’ve also became a sleeper agent but I doubt it.

I don’t think the code attacks people who are with the federation, I think it attacks people because the federation needs them for something or to take them in private, making the code seem worse and more threatening to the residents just helps the cause since it takes the heat off the federation a little bit.

dude i’m chill with people in my ask box just to say hi or something pls pls pls talk to me i am normal i swear i am not foaming at the mouth i can talk to ppl

anyways yeah i absolutely agree with ur first thing, bc of how trumps death affected max and the way he’s been so so focused on finding answers, founding the ordo theoritas, and basically constantly trying to figure out the federation, there’s basically no way he would ever be a part of the federation willingly imo. unlike fit, who seemed to stay more neutral, which makes sense if he was planning on being a traitor for a different organization, and he had to have been planning that for a while, if not since the start, which makes his neutrality seem like a planned move.

however, max is extremely paranoid and gets tunnel vision when it comes to the federation, which makes it extremely easy to manipulate him if u know what ur doing. and look, i hate to have to take the ass camera seriously, especially bc the ass camera thing was like improv that they came up with on the spot, so if you’ll excuse me for being meta for a sec, there’s no way the people who put together the story could’ve planned for that or factored it into the lore. BUT hehe butt implanting some kind of monitoring device into someone does seem like a classic federation move, even though i think it’s main goal was to gather info, and the sowing of dissent was kind of a secondary bonus

and as for the code thing, that’s def an interesting point. i like the idea that the code is a red herring, something planted by the federation to serve its goals. and i think that would be interesting if the codes real goal is to give the players an enemy to unite against, to make them feel like theyre doing something and to take the heat off of the federation for a sec. bc most players seem to agree that between the feds and the code, the feds are the lower priority threat, the lesser of two evils. bc the feds don’t resort to violence as much as the code, and their agents can be reasoned with, in a way, even tho that reasoning and logic seems pretty warped to anyone with a functioning understanding of how emotions work. the code, on the other hand, just shows up, attacks, and leaves, there’s no way to talk to them or try to negotiate, bc you’ll just get killed if you try. so yeah def a possibility

but that’s the thing about the codes. when u theorize u go off of the info that u can gain from the source material, things that are explicitly stated, things that are implied, and things that u can extrapolate based on the data u have and logical thinking. the problem with codes is that they’ve given me basically nothing to work with. all i know is that they attack without mercy, they have some form of admin powers, allowing them to fly and summon mobs, they target the eggs for some reason, and the federation won’t admit they exist. that’s basically it. which means that all of my thoughts on them is just baseless speculation. when i theorize about them, it’s mostly just me speculating on a direction i think the code storyline could possibly go in and how it might affect the storyline, but i have nothing to back that up.

anyways that was basically a long winded way to say, i don’t fuckin know what’s going on with the codes at all but it’s a fun thing to think about and i think ur idea is def plausible and would have interesting implications

[flightofaqrow]

[legs]

physical features ** accepting @nectaric asked [legs]

qrow is the epitome of Goth Anime Legs Uncle. he's the scarecrow standing tall in a field. most of that height is stick legs and super lanky. so much leg.

they're sturdy af to hold a fighting stance or catch a superhero landing, but not solid. qrow is built for versatility and agility, so his legs are more leverage than power, with knobby, bulky knees from all the abuse; his ankles aren't far behind. alcohol is also not proper nutrition, so he doesn't even have a chance of bulking that up until he trades the bottle for real food. he's got a flat, toned layer of muscle around his leg bones and that's about it.

he goes between graceful and absolutely not. he can skillfully summon the precise grace of a dancer and grit of a gymnast (he knows how to do both and incorporates it into his fighting style), but also staggers around when drunk (or pretending to be more hammered than he is), and Misfortune or simply misdirection can make him trip on his own feet, sending those legs straight into the air.

like most of his body, but maybe to a lesser degree, he's quite expressive with his legs, though this is in part because they're so darn long they don't sit right on most furniture. the dramatic poses (u kno the one), the strutting in the middle of a fight, the manspreading, the way he sits stupid in chairs or on couches. conversely, he'll curl them into himself when he's feeling insecure.

...any wonder why he feels like he can find places he fits in better outside four walls?

[hirokiyuu]

🤡🛒✨🤩

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

HMMM most recently the part of ridgefic where sol starts shouting abt being in love w/dys and hes like. actually i need to be standing for this. was one of the first beats of that scene i had and i was immensely happy w/how it came out wwwwww

in terms of older stuff tho i do always love the exchange in pef where goro is telling the pt abt his original plan and ann is like "that kind of sucked ass man" and goro is like. Yes. I Know That Now.

🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

The Power Of Love (unironic) genuinely have i ever written something that's not about how Human Connection Is What Will Save Us From The Utter Bleak Despair Of The Universe (guy who read tokyo babylon at like age fifteen adn imprinted so so hard)

in terms of other more concrete stuff....... i like scenes of characters eating or sharing some kind of sustenance together u kno. food is love! i love you i want you to eat well etc. thinking abt rex+vace at the bar thinking abt pef thinking abt the vace+sol thing i havent written but that exists in my heart etc etc Food Is A Metaphor For Love In Fiction And Real Life Also

✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

haha omg you are sooooo sexy and full of atmosphere and you do Not use too many semicolons no matter what almond says (starts crying)

🤩 Who is your favorite character to write?

Guy Who Has Written 70k of akechi goro. fr tho idk if i'll ever find a guy who's sooooooo easy and fun to write for me i have such a good good time putting myself in his head (air voice Rosetta Stone) it's so easy for slip into hsi voice+mindset (Air Voice Rosetta Stone) i love writing him always forever my best boy.............

[000life-is-meaningless000]

@everyone

Wanna Be A Christian ?

Get's a Mental, Psychological Starter Pack !

. . . . . . .

No Matter How Evil God is or unfair, God is Good All of the Time, And All of the God is Good. Even if He Send's All innocent to hell for a Quick Laugh.

All Ghost Are Demon's, No Matter What !

Animal's Don't Have a Soul And Are Probably Demon's .

Alien's Are Demon's.

Space is Fake.

The Sun is Flat.

The Earth is Flat.

The Moon is Flat.

Everything is Demonic.

All other Religions are False and were invented By the Devil to get u sent to hell by a all-knowing Deity's, is ALREADY KNOW'S EVERYTHING & DOESN'T NEED TO JUDGE !

if you Are not a Christian you're a Demon, even though a Demon is a Creature of the Darkness, of the force of the Dark, and is Not a Fallen Angel, For a Demon's Soul is Made up Of the Darkness is is, in Short a Demon is Sentient Darkness, then again the very Force itself is also sentient, So . . . this is getting way too complicated way too complex.

if you are a Christian you must know that the Catholics are demons the Christians know that the Muslims are demons the Jews are demons the pagans are demons - if your Catholic Christians are demons Jews or demons Muslims are demons evangelicals are demons, if you are a Jew Muslims or demons Christians are demons Catholics or demons, if your Muslim everyone's a demon if they're not a Muslim it's simple Everyone's the enemy of fucking God.

You Need to Kiss the Ass of a Narcissistic Sociopathic Deity, and please this motherfucker 24/7 and give him infinite fucking Ego High's, he's only going to let people into his fucking Heaven that he knows they are going to serve as Ego.

You need to Read & Believe in a Book that is Around 2000 Year's Old & Has Bin Thoroughly Debunked, and is full of plot holes & hypocrisy it's like 10 million hypocrisies in the Bible.

you lose your free will in heaven it repeats that over and over again in the Bible you lose your free will in heaven I wonder if you even also lose your Consciousness and you spend eternity worshiping a God for all eternity to please this mofos ego for The Rest of, Ever !

Let Even one Kno There Going to Hell, because they are living their lives, Minding their own business and not causing any problems simply because they don't want to join a Religion.

Shane Anyone ( With, Extreme Disgust ) For Using Logic or Critical Thinking Skill's, are you in a tiniest Amount of Reasoning. or Rational Thinking.

Give A Middle Finger To Sanity.

say everything is the devil quite literally shame everything of life and call it the devil everything the devil the Earth is the devil the sky at the devil's face is the devil people are the devil everyone is a demon every one of the devil everything is demonic, this is how to be a Real Christian.

Hate Everyone, and Hate Everything, While Saying You Love Them.

Wear a Golden Sword, that stands for conquering and not a symbol of Christ died on it the real symbol of the Cross means to conquer it has nothing about a man dying on a cross and there's literally no historical proof and I've done my research there's no historical proof of a man dying for cruciferation the Romans did not crucify people. That's Deep historical Evidence.

Lie to people 24/7, and feel like a Good Person.

Realize there is a Good chance you're preacher is a Pedophile, but ignore that cuz you're more focused on going to heaven after you die.

pray to a deity that's already knows everything and knows you in that specific point in time we're going to pray you cuz he's all knowing and all powerful so what the fuck is the point ? either way still pray to an all-knowing deity you want things to go better for you and then suddenly be surprised he didn't give a shit ? but you're a Christian and you're going to keep on asking for shit that's already set in stone and allegedly how things are supposed to happen because everything is predestined so why the fuck are you praying ? again ?

Stop Thinking ! <- No ! Seriously ! it's a Sin ! ! !

I would go deeper and how to be a good Christian on the basic and a lot of basics I would go deeper but it's not it would break the terms of service and Community guidelines of Tumblr if I start repeat how dark and violent and just brutally horrible the Christian Bible is and I've actually read it I've actually read the thing from the beginning to the end and it is far Darker than Mortal Kombat.

I gave you the startup how to be a good little Christian and also I want to warn you that the the Christian religion is extremely misogynistic I'm surprised feminist didn't go to war against the church I'm surprised you said you do anything in feminist get offended but if feminist knew how extremely sexist the Christian Bible is they would blow their minds up like a Goddamn nuke.

if you are a feminist and you hate men that's great listen I don't give a fuck but if you are a feminist and you are read my post and I dare you to pick up a Christian Bible and read it. I know it's bullshit but you got to see that's their religion that's what they call Holy and they believe in and it is so fucking Ultra anti-female women have no rights no power and they can do nothing and they must be servited to men.

@ Any Feminist - 😡 - I dare you to read that fucking book from beginning to end. sorry about it being a sexist stereotype of women love to read a lot more than men it's just a feminine trait apparently for a human female. you don't see animal females doing that shit they're all different. sorry but you see me as a Sexist piece of shit or some kind of man pig but I every time I see a woman they're reading something, very intently.

so I highly recommend if you're a female to go read the Christian Bible from beginning to end even if it takes you a week to get through it read the entire Bible and see all the horror, of it all.

Link :

Link :

😡 - Feminist always talk about Rape, but not once have they read the Bible !

[pesterloglog]

Dave Strider, Roxy Lalonde, Karkat Vantas

Page 387-391

DAVE: now you know i like to deflect as much as the next person

DAVE: but ive had mad substantial character development in the last few minutes

DAVE: so maybe im willing to entertain the notion that i may be in the wrong here

ROXY: o damn fr?

DAVE: no ive never been wrong in my entire life

DAVE: but if its important to you i can rein it in

DAVE: practically a saint

DAVE: even though the only religions that really existed on the new earth we made was fucked up clown catholicism and sixty-nine troll jesus

DAVE: cant really call the pope and ask to be sainted like back on real earth

ROXY: could u rly

DAVE: yeah thats how it worked

ROXY: i dont believe u but i dont know enough about religion to argue

DAVE: its ok im making most of it up

DAVE: the only god i know is the god of rhymes

DAVE: incase that wasnt clear im the god of rhymes

DAVE: its me

ROXY: i thought u were a god of times

DAVE: amateur mistake

DAVE: the letters are right next to each other

DAVE: even then its not like im using the time stuff much anymore

DAVE: not since...

DAVE: ...

ROXY: i saw u use ur time powers earlier today to make a banana less brown

DAVE: i have explained this over and over

DAVE: you need to eat the banana before it goes bad

ROXY: its not bad just ripe

DAVE: this is fucking outrageous

ROXY: maybe if u stopped slicing fruit with ur sword all the time u might understand

ROXY: the subtle intricacies

ROXY: of fruit science

DAVE: is fruit science just going apeshit on a practically moldy banana

ROXY: lmao

DAVE: dont "luhmayo" me

ROXY: lol

DAVE: like i got time to be lectured by somebody who says "lole"

DAVE: barbaric

DAVE: i come from a more civilized era

DAVE: i drink my scotch as i sit before the mantle

DAVE: having just returned from the hunt

DAVE: a fire in the hearth dwindling down just so

DAVE: ah yes roxy old bean jolly good

DAVE: i hold my pinky out as i take a sip from my chalice because im not a fucking animal

DAVE: you make some sort of unbelievable jest and i say ell oh ell like a real person

ROXY: ok jake english

DAVE: this is the most heinous thing youve ever said to me

ROXY: theres somethin i gotta ask

ROXY: bout u kno who

DAVE: voldemort

ROXY: no

DAVE: is it voldemort

ROXY: its not voldemort

DAVE: you havent mentioned wizards once this conversation so im gonna have to assume its voldemort

ROXY: its about

ROXY: you know

ROXY: dirk

DAVE: ok shoot

ROXY: what do we do

DAVE: what do you mean

ROXY: u know when we catch up

ROXY: what r we gonna do

DAVE: maybe

DAVE: this whole thing is kinda bullshit and we are adults capable of being the people we need to be at the time it is appropriate to be that person

ROXY: what do u mean

DAVE: ok so theres this flower

ROXY: omg not u too with the flower

ROXY: i heard this story like five times

DAVE: oh ok

DAVE: but you get it right

DAVE: the story is what you make it

DAVE: and in that case maybe we are assigning this cosmic importance to things that dont need metatextual meaning

ROXY: i rly dont think thats the point of the story tbh

DAVE: then what do you think it means

ROXY: broson im sayin this with the utmost respect for u

ROXY: its not that deep

ROXY: its just a story

DAVE: then what about this

DAVE: do you think dirks right

DAVE: are we just a story that needs a villain

DAVE: are we heroes rescuing a damsel in distress

DAVE: or are we just people doing things that feel right at the time

ROXY: ya maybe this is just our arc

DAVE: i dont think life is just a series of arcs

ROXY: well to be fair

ROXY: our lives have just been a series of arcs

ROXY: and we r basically rushin off to save a damsel

ROXY: tho dont tell her i said that lmao

ROXY: ofc i want everyone to sort it out

ROXY: hunky dory

DAVE: but thats not what youre asking

ROXY: but thats not what im askin

ROXY: what i wanna know is

ROXY: do u think u can kill him

ROXY: if it comes to it

DAVE: i-

KARKAT: AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ROXY: wtf was that

DAVE: he probably found one of callies little gifts

DAVE: been seein a lot more of them lately which debunks his leading theory that theyve been livin in the vents

ROXY: what

DAVE: i cant believe he never told you

DAVE: its all he talks about

DAVE: i told him it was kinda nuts but

DAVE: you know how he can get

ROXY: well i think since jades regular now

ROXY: callies felt more comfortable being up and around

ROXY: before they were just in the room nesting snug as a bug in a rug

DAVE: nesting

ROXY: ya like a bug in a rug what is there to not get lmao

DAVE: well they keep leaving karkat little piles of meat

DAVE: like a cat

ROXY: damb thats adorbs

DAVE: in his shoes

DAVE: at the foot of the bed

DAVE: hes convinced its to dunk on him in some way

DAVE: but thats just karkat being karkat

ROXY: but in the vents tho

DAVE: yeah i dont know man

DAVE: hes obsessed with it

DAVE: for once in his life he doesnt want to talk about it

DAVE: guess well never know

[terrifictoonman]

[WP] “At Power Pre-K, we have all sorts of activities to nurture the budding superhero, villain, monster, titan, or…um, what exactly IS your child?” [u/codeScramble - Reddit]

~Lost in My World~

The Atlas Educational Center, since 1982, has been a pillar in the "enhanced" community. From superheroes to supervillains, from Kijus to Titans, even the horrors of the unknown found their way through Atlas' hollowed halls. Regardless of gender, race, religion, state of being, or dimensional status, Atlas is here for you!

As the bell sounds, hoards of children rush out of their classrooms and make their way to the exits. Fighting against the waves of children are a couple. A man with glossy black hair and wearing a cheap grey suit that's one size too big, and a faceless feminine-looking robot in a teal nurse uniform with a massive stain on its chest.

"I still can't believe you bought a suit," groaned the robot.

"I thought you wanted me to look more professional?" asked the man.

"You look like you hang around sports bars looking to "loan" people money," said the robot. "The fact that I'm currently wearing vomit and still look better than you is just pathetic."

"Welp, it's a good thing you didn't love me for my looks," said the man. "Next door on the right." The two stop before a blue door labeled "After School Care." The two look through the door's window, seeing kids playing with each other and an eight-foot, yellow-scaled half-dragon man reading a book to a group of kids.

"Scans aren't picking up anything out of the ordinary," said the robot.

"Why doesn't that make me feel any better," said the man. The half-dragon noticed the two and motioned them to come inside. "Any last words?"

"Yeah," said the robot as they opened the door, "Don't [CENSORED] up." The man wipes his hair before following the robot inside as the half-dragon sends the children around him away.

"Hello, I'm Mr. Thune. I'm with the front office," said Mr. Thune as he shook the robot's hand. "Are you Barbie's parents?"

"Barbie?" asked the robot.

"I'm her dad, Elliot," said Elliot, shaking Mr. Thune's hand, "just call me "Elli." This Barbie's...birth mother, Ruth, model designation R_0tH." Mr. Thune looked at his hand as hair grease dripped from it. "I am so sorry."

"No worries," said Mr. Thune. With the flick of his wrist, his hand suddenly burst into flames, evaporating the grease from his hand. "Follow me." Mr. Thune guides the two to a door at the room's far corner. Meanwhile, Ruth stares daggers at Elli.

"You named it?!" whispered Ruth.

"She named herself," whispered Bob. "Besides, it's kinda fitting if you think about it."

"I can see how you'd think that," said Ruth. "Also, what did we talk about using my real model?"

"Hey! It took a lot of work getting Bee into this place," said Elli, "I'm not risking getting her kicked out just because you're- "

"*Ahem*," Inturupted Mr. Thune as he held open the door, "right this way." The two regain what little composure they had before walking into Mr. Thune's office. Mr. Thune then pulls a stone with a rune carved into it. He whispers into the stone, flames flowing from his mouth into rune, causing it to glow orange. Mr. Thune tosses the stone back into the Daycare room, and it transforms into a golem made of rock and amber. A lizard child points at the golem.

"It's Mr. Pebbles!" yelled the child, followed by the frantic cheers of the other children. Mr. Pebbles whines as he looks back at Mr. Thune, who's slowly closing the door behind him.

"Fifteen minutes, twenty minutes tops," said Mr. Thune as he closed the door just before seeing the children pounce on Mr. Pebbles. With a heavy sigh, Mr. Thune walks over to his desk and sits across from Bob and Abbi. "Anyway, let me start off by saying that your daughter is not in any trouble."

"Oh, thank god!" muttered Elli, relieved.

"However, we do have some- " Mr. Thune pauses as he looks around his room. "questions. First off, is there any genetic or magical history that we should know about, anything you may have forgotten to put on her forms?"

"Nothing I know of," said Elli. "She doesn't like basil." Ruth stealthily kicks Elli's shin under the desk.

"All of its information is up to date," said Ruth. "Is there something wrong?"

"No, nothing's wrong," said Mr. Thune. "It's just that...here at AEC, we run all of our students through a genetic database to help better identify their needs or any assistance they may need now or in the future. Now, I mean no disrespect, but neither of you is Barbie's genetic parent, correct?

"No," answered Ruth.

"But we're her parents where it counts!" Elli interjected.

"I promise you, that is not in question," said Mr. Thune. The half-dragon's ears perk up suddenly as he stares intensely at Bob. "We've just noticed some abnormalities that I thought you could help us identify."

"Uh...like what, exactly," asked Elli, nervously.

"Well, for starters," said Mr. Thune, "your daughter seems to have a habit of disappearing."

"Like, skipping class?" asked Elli.

"Oddly no," answered Mr. Thune, "AEC has the most advanced surveillance system of all our neighboring universes through the use of science, magic, and temporal machinations. However, it seems your daughter can avoid detection completely for short periods." Ruth sits up in her chair.

"You're implying it has the ability to hide its entire existence from time itself," said Ruth. "That's impossible."

"Not for Barbie, it seems," said Mr. Thune. "We've asked her how she does it, and her response is like any child her age, "I don't know. At first, we thought she may have been some old god or eldritch being or maybe just a re-incarnated pillar of reality. Those theories eventually proved false."

"Is that...good?" asked Elli. Mr. Thune sat silently for a moment as his gaze shifted to Ruth. "Is that a "no?"

"I'll be frank with you," said Mr. Thune. "As an elder dragon, I have seen the death and birth of universes more times than even fifth-dimensional beings can imagine, and in all that time, I have never felt, let alone seen, a being as unique as Barbie." Mr. Thune pulls a pamphlet from a desk drawer and slides it in front of Elli and Ruth.

"There is a universe known as the Index, dedicated to capturing all the knowledge of the multiverse and every previous iteration of it. It may know what Barbie truly is and her capabilities."

"But?" asked Ruth.

"But," continued Mr. Thune, "due to the universe's unique properties, it is unlikely you could accompany her to Index." Ruth and Elli tense up at the thought. "Now, this is by no means mandatory. Barbie has been a model student, has excellent behavior and stellar grades, and is well-liked by almost everyone. However, some would feel more comfortable having a better idea of what exactly your daughter is."

"Why? She's perfect," said Elli, "that's all that matters."

"Elli..." said Ruth.

"No!" interrupted Elli, "I don't care if some fancy school board or a few parents feel uncomfortable around my kid. From what I've heard, she's done nothing but what was asked of her and then some!"

"Sir, please," said Mr. Thune, "nothing's set in stone. I just wanted to make sure that you're aware..." Elli nearly jumps out of his seat and stares down Mr. Thune.

"Save it! I don't need you or some universe to tell me my little girl's special!" said Elli, "I get a reminder every morning when she wakes me up to take her to school!" Ruth grabs Elli's shoulder, and the two look at each other before Abbi eases him away from Mr. Thune.

Elli breaks free of Ruth's grasp and walks towards the door. As he gets closer, the sounds of children whispering and running away can be heard on the other side. All Ruth can do is watch as Elli storms out of the office.

"I'm sorry," said Mr. Thune. "I had no intention of upsetting..."

"It's fine," said Ruth, "emotions run high when it comes to her. Sometimes, he just cares too much."

"In my line of work, there's no such thing," said Mr. Thune. Ruth takes the pamphlet and looks over it for a second. "It's yours if you want it?"

"...no thank you," said Ruth as she returned the pamphlet to the desk. "I should probably chase after him before he angrily shows people baby pictures. Thank you for your time."

"Not a problem. I'll have them send your daughter to the front office," said Mr. Thune. Ruth nods as she leaves the office, closing the door behind her. With a deep, raspy breath, Mr. Thune blasts a cloud of ash from his nostrils that quickly fills the room. The sound of muffled coughing could be heard all around the room as several random objects began to shake.

"You know, it's rude to eavesdrop on adult conversations," said Mr. Thune as he stood up from his chair. "Come on, your parents are waiting for you."

Suddenly, several books, pens, paper, as well as other objects became solid black as they melted into liquids. The black liquids then flowed collectively into one of the chairs facing Mr. Thune, combining into a three-foot-tall humanoid figure. Three balls of light hovered from the ceiling light above the black figure.

Two of the lights placed themselves on the black figure's head, acting as their eyes, while the last one set itself where the heart would be. The black figure then transformed into a pale, nearly white-skinned little girl with chin-length messy black hair and equally messy pigtails. The girl wore a grey dress with a teal jacket, mismatched socks, and matching mismatched sneakers.

The Barbie sheepishly looked up at Mr. Thune as she made her backpack appear.

"I'm sorry my daddy got mad," said Barbie.

"It's ok, he was just scared," said Mr. Thune.

"I know," said Barbie. Mr. Thune walks over to Barbie but barely passes his desk before Barbie hugs his legs. "I don't want my parents to be scared of me."

"Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey," said Mr. Thune as he kneeled to meet Barbie. "If I've learned anything today, it's that neater of your parents are scared of you. They...they just want what's best for you, and sometimes it's hard to know what that is."

"Because they don't know what I am?" asked Barbie.

"They know who you are," said Mr. Thune. "You're Barbie, the girl who can do anything! And that's enough." Barbie wipes her face and smiles. "There's that superstar smile. Come on, let's get you to the office so I don't get yelled at again."

[borderline-gays-club]

I had such a fucked up dream last night. Definitely bc I was feeling anxious yesterday and today . I’ll get into that later

But my dream: I was with a group of ppl, I guess they were my friends ? And one of them I had like a crush/obsession feeling towards him. And he literally wouldn’t even look me in the eye. Like barely recognized I existed. And everything I said and did he’d b annoyed or dismissive. And it felt so shitty bc I wanted his approval SOOO badly. I was desperately trying to impress him and every attempt made him dislike me more lol.

And then at the end of the dream I was on the train with this group of ppl and we were going to the beach or something. And they all like got up and was like oh we’ll b back gotta do something (I forget wat it was but it made sense in the dream lol). So I was like ok sure. And then a lot of time passed and one of the ppl texted me like oh ya we left btw. And I was just on this train alone fuckin devastated. And then I woke up in real life anxious as fuck.

So yah I kno why I had this dream. Today was my last day at my job and I decided to not tell everyone it was my last day. Long story short my manager disrespected me and so I decided not to put in my two weeks cus it fucked with my plan to take my pto and then b gone. And like she doesn’t deserve time to find someone new to replace me lol.

ANYWAY. Ofc my last shift here I’m closing with my used to b obsession(but still falls into the category of me wanting him to want me), and so all fuckin day I’m thinking of how to say bye to him without fully revealing that todays my last day and even rehearsing it in my head.

Also he’s very fuckin avoidant and barely talks lol and does not really express sentimental emotion(which is why I became obsessed lmao) . And so I was just anxious abt saying my goodbyes subtly specifically toward him cus I had a gut feeling I wud b disappointed. Annnnd I was right lol. But it’s ok.

Cus I had this fantasy in my head that we’d go out on one date and I’d seduce him and then just disappear. I guess ultimately it’s a power trip I wanted. Idk gotta think thru my motivations a bit more.

But ya all I said to him was, r u gonna miss me? (And depending on his answer had a follow up question). And ofc he answers in the most indirect way. He fuckin says, do u want me to miss u? And I say …uh I’m asking u lol. And he just goes maybe, I don’t kno I’m clueless..

Like bitch. I had to laugh. And like I kno for a fact he at least enjoys my company cus he’s expressed fondness only when he was drunk lmao. But it’s ok, I’m doing good by not letting this stupid response affect me too much LOL. Cus I kno he’s just avoidant as fuck and also my desire for him is purely bc of my BPD. Within a week I’ll prob forget abt this whole thing. In fact I will.

Anyway it’s the end of an era at this place for me: feels bittersweet cus I genuinely got along with pretty much everyone but unfortunately my manager had to fuck it up.

I’m anxious of my new job but it’ll b a good refresh button tbh. Change is a good thing

[llamasgotoheaven]

goD who am i even kidding my shipping dynamic is highly intelligent woman who is morosexual

[cirillafionaelenriannon]

.

[samcollinsbf]

a few redacted piercing hcs

im like sooo tired rn so these are very unorganized feeling + i will make a more cohesive post tomorrow or something with more of the dudes but for now my thoughts must be shared.

these are organized in order from most to least me just projecting so bear with it

CW for body modification described in pretty heavyish detail + mention of needles of course under the cut

Darlin

darlin has 1738292933 piercings like just trust me

they have 2 professionally done from when they were like a baby but the rest they did by hand

as i've stated before they've given sam a couple of ear piercings

like the amount of trust you need to have in someone to stick a needle in your ear hello !! holding your vampire boyfriends face in your hands !! they mean a lot to me can you tell.

they've gotten infected a million times before probably but each time are like fuck it we ball !!

they're actually decent at piercing now though. they've got the routine down and can name the technical term for like every piercing imaginable

Lasko

3 total. 2 lobe + 1 helix

lasko love of my life did his helix himself but like. horribly. it was shortly after he left his parents place so idk he was running off adrenaline a little

he is not a super adventurous man but he was having a moment and figured it couldn’t hurt That bad.

tried to do it with a sewing needle in his bathroom mirror

it did infact hurt that bad. bro had to stop halfway through to take a breather like helix piercings hurt so bad if you’re doing it on ur own especially if you don't kno wtf you're doing

he powered through it though and im so proud of him

ASHER OMG

11 total

5 lobe 3 helix 1 industrial

he’s also a self proclaimed expert piercer

except his pain tolerance in Low. six feet under the ground. he is in agony every single time but is like Fuck it we ball !!!!!

he is a LIAR though and tells everyone it’s like Super easy and quick to do

david knows the truth though.

asher’s first time piercing his ears was in david’s bedroom when they were teenagers

bro had a sewing needle a block of ice and the feeling of pure spite

towards what idk he had an emo phase he was having a moment like lasko🤷‍♂️

david probably incessantly told him to Not to do it because its “stupid” and “going to get insanely infected” but at some point gave up and just watched as asher attempted to stab himself in the ear as he sat criss cossed infront of davids bedroom mirror

they had radio head playing in the background because the image made me giggle.

asher ended up chickening out with the needle halfway through his ear because it hurt

david had to do it the rest of the way for him like the ally to the trans community he is 🙏

and OH MY GOD i saw these earrings at niles months ago that were like little red circles about a centimeter wide with silver paw prints on them

he wears those.

ACK damien my love

i feel like he got an industrial piercing at some point

actually you know what he actually had a shit ton of ear piercings

day to day though he takes them out all you see are a ring of little holes in his ear because they kept getting caught on his clothes + he wears glasses and he hates how it feels when the click against things

he keeps them in at night through and will wear them for special occasions

ok these get less detailed from here on out

elliot : left eyebrow piercing + gauged ears

guy : ok this is based off some like fanart i saw of him that i actually can’t find now that im looking for it but i think he has a double eyebrow piercing (whoever has made fanart of him like that im kissing u on the face ur like sooo real for that one bro.)

vincent : SNAKE BITES. also like small gauges

milo : i think !! he has a septum im not sure though

ok im like atually way to tired to continue i just really like body modification have i made that clear enough.

[lawisnotmocked]

Hello sir. You will probably either find this deeply offensive or hilarious but lately I have an obsession with the character of Javert as I recently watched the 2012 Les Mis because “oh the memes about it back in the day were classic.” Yes I am serious sometimes I watch movies just because I liked a YTP of it. Then I find out that in addition to being perfect meme fodder, Javert has a weird one-sided (??) pseudo enemies to loves dynamic with the loaf of bread guy (I did not know his name until like three days ago to me he was always just the guy who sang “I stole a loaf of bread.”)These types of characters who give vibes like they’re lgbt, have dog or cat-like qualities, and are overly dramatic typically become my Blorbos (a similar example would be majima from RGG who’s also a crazy dog-like man who attacks his crush.) SO what I am requesting is could you please give me your crack headcanons about Javert? Like funny shit about Javert. If you have recommends for crack fics about Javert I’d appreciate it, bonus points if any of the headcanons/fics are Valvert cuz idk I just find them really funny together. Prob mostly because of the memes not gonna lie. If you could also educate me on Valjean and Javert’s mannerisms in the Brick I would be most appreciative because to be totally real with u… I’m so sorry but I don’t wanna read or watch parts that are not about him or loaf guy 😬 (ya I kno shame on me and all that…) but I need to know more about how they act so I can make hideous crack fics of my own. Thank u 🙏🐶

First of all anon how does it feel to be the funniest person on the internet this is the best ask I’ve ever received :’3

Even without crack headcanons brick Javert is just absolutely hilarious as a character?? I feel like a lot of adaptations try to take him too seriously and like yeah he does have a serious and tragic aspect to his character but he’s also a very fruity drama queen who has like 0 awareness of his surroundings, acts like a feral dog on crack and has this weird magic power that allows him to know people’s real identity no matter how well disguised they are. (I maintain that les mis does have a form of magic system in the brick but it’s more like mundane mostly useless superpowers?? Like super strength that just makes you a little bit more strong that an average person, or really good instincts or something. Anyway lol)

Some Actual Canon Facts about Javert from the brick are:

- Is implied to have the soul of a dog

- Bares all of his teeth when he smiles

- Fucking hates reading but does it anyway

- Keeps a snuffbox on him at all times and snorts snuff after he feels like an arrest has gone well

- Dissociates for a solid 5 minutes and misses the entirety of a conversation bc someone said something he didn’t agree with

- I know the ‘you need to punish me Mr Mayor’ scene is in the movie but it’s so much funnier in the brick :’3

- Accidentally sets his coat on fire by standing too close to the stove

- Announces himself to Thenardier’s criminal gang who he’s about to arrest by making a stupid joke

- Tells Thenardier that he can shoot him if he wants because the gun will just misfire. Thenardier shoots him and the gun misfires.

- Doesn’t really have any friends and his coworkers don’t like him either because he doesn’t take bribes and refuses to work with criminals to catch other criminals

- There’s an entire Code Of Symbolism in the brick thats purpose is to represent how horny Javert is, which I wrote about here along with some other Javert related stuff

This man is just a fucking disaster honestly :’3 I headcanon that’s he’s ADHD, autistic, severely depressed and probably has some form of childhood PTSD?? But I’ve also seen other people headcanon that he has BPD or OCD and honestly all of them are good hcs because he’s absolutely neurodivergent.

I absolutely understand not wanting to read the whole brick if you only care about two of the characters lol, but the Hapgood English translation of the brick is public domain so I’ve linked a couple of Javert chapters you might find funny!

Javert’s introduction | punish me mr mayor | Javert lends Marius two pistols he never gets back and burns his coat on the stove | Javert arrests Thenardier and tells him to shoot him

Brick Valjean is also a chaotic bitch but he’s less camp and more like a cryptid with PTSD. Off the top of my head he:

- Sews money into the inside of his coat when Cosette is young

- Keeps the rest of his money buried in the woods

- Accidentally convinces some townspeople that he’s the devil by sneaking around said woods

- Stuffs his pockets with wigs and disguises in case he ever needs to make a quick getaway

- Someone tries to rob him and he tackles them to the ground then lectures them on how they should let god into their heart and stop stealing

- Holds a hot poker against his arm when Thenardier tries to extort him for money to intimidate him

- He just really loves Cosette this isn’t a funny or anything he just really loves his daughter and wants the best for her

In the brick Javert also doesn’t even actively seek out Valjean?? They go years without thinking about each other then they run into each other again in the weirdest circumstances and go ‘omg not this weirdo again 🙄’

As for my own favourite crack headcanons :3c

- Modern au Javert is a furry. His fursona is a wolfdog called Orion :-)

- [NSFW] He’s unironically into vore

- He wants a fursuit very badly but he can’t afford it until he’s dating Valjean and Valjean buys him one

- Valjean doesn’t get it but he’s glad his partner is happy :-)

- [NSFW] In my ideal Javert lives modern au he quits the police, goes to therapy and joins a kink group because I think he’d thrive in that environment 😌

- Valjean has like 5 fake driver’s licenses

- Javert will literally comment on how hot he finds a man and still doesn’t realise he’s gay until he makes out with Valjean. Thinks he’s straight even though he’s never been attracted to a woman before. Is literally that unaware of his own feelings.

- Valjean has no fashion sense. He dresses so bad that it comes full circle and it looks like his outfit clashes intentionally. Cosette is horrified.

- Javert is awful to watch movies with, especially detective movies, because he talks the whole time and points out all the inaccuracies

- Valjean never makes eye contact. Javert makes too much very intense eye contact.

- No one invites them to events because they’re awful together. Javert shit talks people’s outfits or decor very loudly to Valjean and Valjean hates socialising and doesn’t want to be there

I don’t think I know any good crack fic bc I mostly just read angst lol uwu’’ but if anyone has any suggestions pls feel free to add them!! I’ll add links if I think of anything though 😌

[kaistarus]

Mistexting Mayhem

Pairing: Nishinoya X Reader

Words: 1.6K

Summary: You accidentally send Nishinoya a text that was meant for Yachi and now he’s knows secrets you were hoping he never found out

A/N: If you think this fic is anything but crack you’re wrong lmao I’ve always wanted to write a fic with this style and Noya is great for the chaos i needed. It was fun

Masterlist

[6:40pm] idiot⚡: look y/n without adhd id be too powerful

                         i could beet god himself in handtohand combat

                         god was afraid of my raw fuckin awesomeness wen i bursted from the woom

[6:41pm] y/n: there is so much wrong with what u just said

[6:41pm] idiot⚡: i have absoltly no clue wat

[6:43pm] y/n: put those 3 brain cells to work. I believe in you

[6:43pm] idiot⚡: but theyve reached their daily quota

                          plz there so tired and overworked

You snorted, a dopey smile on your lips as you laid surrounded by textbooks and homework, swinging your feet in the air behind you. You focused intently on the cell phone in your hand doing everything you could to procrastinate the schoolwork around you.

[6:44pm] y/n: noyas so stupid

[6:44pm] yachi❤: i thought you liked him?

[6:45pm] y/n: jeez Yachi. dont come for my throat

                       i cant help that i have bad taste 🙄

[6:46pm] yachi❤: if it helps he tripped over a stray ball today

                               maybe think of that till you don’t like him??

Unfortunately, the image of Nishinoya waving to everyone then biffing it only had you smiling like a dork. How you’d gotten to a point that Nishinoya being an idiot made you swoon, you’ll never know.

You raised your eyebrow suspiciously at the new notification on Snapchat from ‘Tanaka’ and after swiping it open you nearly dropped your phone. Looking back at you was Nishinoya, his head tilted and eyebrow quirked in confusion with a gari-gari kun shoved halfway down his throat. The caption at the bottom reading ‘daaaammn look at your prince charming go 😩’.

You frowned at the picture, letting out a frustrated groan at how your heart accelerated against your ribcage. You quickly tapped out of it and reopened the messenger app.

[6:57pm] y/n: we have to kill Noya

[6:57pm] idiot⚡: we??? what kind of mission is this??? 😤

[6:58pm] y/n: i like him too much. he has to die. its for my own good

You waited impatiently for her response and almost debated doing your homework since it took longer than you felt necessary. You supposed you had suggested murder to Yachi, but still…

When you finally received a response your entire body froze.

[7:11pm] idiot⚡: U LIKE ME?!?!? 😍

                          UR KILLING ME?!?! 😢

                          IM SO CONFUSED......

                          and a lil turned on ngl👀

Your hand covered your mouth in horror as you processed what the hell you had just done. This didn’t happen to people in real life. Mistexting was stuff people made up when they created fake texts for social media to get likes. You didn’t think people actually went through this.

You opened new notifications to escape the hell that stared you straight in the face.

[7:15pm] Tanaka💪: Yo, whatd u do. Whys Noya having a panic attak

[7:16pm] y/n: I accidently texted him instead of Yachi and told him i liked him 😣

[7:16pm] Tanaka💪: O wtf thats hilarious 😂

[7:17pm] y/n: ITS NOT HILArIOUS

[7:18pm] Tanaka💪: Hes askin if its a prank. Wat do i do?

[7:19pm] y/n:I DONT KNOW SDKFHJN IM THE IDIOT WHO STSRTED IT

He stopped responding and you banged your head against your pillow anxiously.

[7:23pm] y/n: YACHI ITOLD NoYA I LKED HIM AND NOU HE NOS WAY DO JI DO!?!????! 😭😭😭

[7:23pm] idiot⚡: THIS ISNT YACHI!!!!

                           HOLY FUKC U DO LIEK ME!!!

You screamed into your pillow. Were you fucking kidding? This could not be happening.

[7:25pm] Tanaka💪: dude, twice? i cant save u now 🤪

[7:25pm] y/n: betraying me in my time of fucking need? i’ll remember this asshole

[7:26pm] Tanaka💪: so vulgar 👀

You growled at Tanaka’s uselessness and bravely peeked through one eye as you went back to your conversation with Nishinoya.

[7:24pm] idiot⚡: STOP IGNORING ME I KNO UR TEXTING RYU

[7:26pm] idiot: IM GONNA KEEP SPAMMING U TILL U ANSWE RME😤

[7:26pm] idiot⚡: 1

                          2

                          3

                          4

                          5

                           6

                           7

                           8

                           9

[7:27pm] y/n: what is this twitch chat? fuck 

[7:28pm] idiot⚡: your heeeeererererreee 🥰

[7:29pm] y/n: soooooo………..

                        clearly there has been a misunderstanding

[7:29pm] idiot⚡: oh nonono. I understand PERFETCLY. u LOVE me

                         its ok. this is a safe space. we can discuss feelings 😌

[7:31pm] y/n: there are zero feelings to discuss

[7:31pm] idiot⚡: then y did u say u like me too much so i have to die?

[7:34pm] y/n: i am filled with rage 🤬

[7:34pm] idiot⚡: rage over how much u liiike me???🥰🥰🥰

[7:36pm] y/n: definitely not

You racked your brain for some kind of reasonable sounding excuse, eventually landing on:

[7:36pm] y/n: It was autocorrect

[7:36pm] idiot⚡: HAH????? FROM?????

[7:38pm] y/n: HAH???

                       ....Nora?

[7:38pm] idiot⚡: Who TF is nora???? 😡

[7:39pm] y/n: someoe i like obviously 😏

[7:40pm] idiot⚡: so u like them but u use my name so much it autocorrected to me? 🤔

[7:44pm] y/n: OK MR DETEcTIVE WHERE TF ARE THES BRAIN CELS COMIN GFROM?

[7:45pm] idiot⚡: i pull them out for special ocasions 😌

[7:45pm] y/n: well how bout you pack those up and put em away

[7:46pm] idiot⚡: how bout two people who LIKE each other SAY something so they can DOOOOOOOO something bout IT 🙄

You began typing a frantic message about how it was none of his business until you processed the message. Then you read it over several times before letting out an audible, “what the fuck.”

[7:50pm] y/n: YOU LIKE ME

[7:50pm] idiot⚡: I FLIRT WITH U ALL THE TIME WAT DO U MEAN yOu LiKe Me!?!

                          FUCKING OBVIOSLY

[7:51pm] y/n: literally when. name one time.

[7:52pm] idiot⚡: I WALK WITH U EVERY MORNING!!!

[7:53pm] y/n: I thought that was a coincidence???

[7:54pm] idiot⚡: I BRNIG U SNACKS DURING LUNCH!!!

[7:54pm] y/n: I thought they were leftovers??

[7:55pm] idiot⚡: …....I call you cute and invite you to my games.

[7:56pm] y/n: you call everyone attractive and i thought there was like a audience quota or something........?

[7:57pm] idiot⚡: ….i cant tell who i should be upset with rn but i think its u 😑

[7:58pm] y/n: WAT WHY!?!

[8:00pm] Idiot⚡: I LIKE U+U LIKE ME=WE LIKE EACH OTHER

[8:01pm] y/n: whoa. slow down. I hate math 😣

[8:02pm] Idiot⚡: ===WE SHUD GO ON A DATE!!!

[8:02pm] y/n: HAH!? i think you started multiplying that addition problem buddy 🤨

Your cheeks were beginning to ache from how wide your dopey grin was. You couldn’t help but tease Nishinoya-it was second nature at this point-even if you now knew your feelings were mutual.

[8:04pm] idiot⚡: i suk at math but thats NOT the point

                         point iiissss i think deep down u want to hang out and cuddle and fall in love

                        maybe even..... 😏 kiiisssss

[8:04pm] y/n: WHOA WHOA WHOA

                        WARN ME BEFORE YOU GET NSFW

                        i would never premarital eye-contact. let alone k🤢ki-🤢🤢kiss🤢🤮🤮

[8:05pm] idiot⚡: well we would have socks on 🙄

[8:06pm] y/n: oh. well if there’s protection

[8:06pm] idiot⚡: Im not a maniac

[8:07pm] y/n: i suppose as long as you dont do something stoopid

                        like faceplant in public

                        that would be humiliating

[8:08pm] idiot⚡: I-

                          who told you that 😠

[8:08pm] y/n: i have spies everywhere noya

                        youre never safe

[8:09pm] Idiot⚡: kinda hot 👀

                         makin me fear for my life like that👀

[8:10pm] y/n: i hate that i like you

                        It kills me inside 

                        i feel braincels leaving with every conversation

[8:12pm] Idiot⚡: fan behavior 😏

                          so am i taking u to eat tomorow or wat?

[8:14pm] y/n: if I HAVE to 🙄

[8:14pm] Idiot⚡: No u GET to

                          I am a fucking delite 😤

[8:15pm] y/n: whatever helps you sleep at night

[8:15pm] Idiot⚡: nothing helps me sleep at night. this mind never rests

[8:16pm] y/n: thinking 24/7 and still not a smart thing comes out of that mouth 👀

[8:17pm] Idiot⚡: yas, bully me more 😫

[8:19pm] y/n: ok thats as much as i can handle for one day......

                       im gonna pretend to do homework

[8:20pm] idiot⚡: okie... good luck my sweet baby pogchamp 🥰

[8:20pm] y/n: no

[8:20pm] Idiot⚡: 😘😘😘

[8:22pm] y/n: 🙄✋

[8:23pm] Idiot⚡: oh FUCK yas 🥵 shut me UP

[8:25pm] y/n: suddenly all i feel is endless regret

[8:26pm] Idiot⚡: i have that effect on people

                          See you tomorrow 🥰🥰🥰

[8:27pm] y/n: unfortunately 😘

[8:27pm] idiot⚡: 🥵

You flung an arm over your eyes and let a small giggle bubble up from your chest. Nishinoya was probably the biggest idiot you’d ever met, but you couldn’t help that thinking of spending time with him had you kicking your feet with excitement.

You supposed you should actually get started on your homework. You reached forward when a notification popped up from Yachi, asking if her idea worked and you had stopped liking Nishinoya.

...you should probably break the news, huh?

[oh-my-may]

Iwaizumi having a “fangirl”

requested: so u kno how Oikawa has hecka fangirls? what if Iwaizumi had a fangirl?? like a group of girls is running at Oikawa them suddenly 1 cute girl disperses and goes up to Iwaizumi instead telling him how cool he was? and Iwaizumi knows fem!reader a little bit before hand and thinks shes cute? i hope its not too much!^^

Cuuuteee, I hope this is what you wanted! :) It was actually quite fun writing this so enjoy!

Seijoh had a practice match against Dateko and obviously they won, even though it was quite the hard match

There were a bunch of girls standing next to you. They screamed and screeched the whole time “Oikawaaaaa!!”

You thought you might go insane

You didn’t know that much about volleyball, in fact you only watched this game because there was nothing else to do and you were bored

And yes you had to admit that this Oikawa person was indeed a good player with powerful serves and extraordinary setting skills, but it was #4 who made the majority of points

He was the ace of the team, after all

Iwaizumi Hajime, and he was in your class, though you never had a lot of contact

He seemed nice though and once you worked on a project together, but that was almsot two years ago and you doubt he’d remember that

You watched the game until the end and found yourself smiling and clapping next to the bunch of fangirls of Oikawa

“Isn’t Oikawa waaayyy too handsome to be real?” “Well I actually think that Iwaizumi-” “He’s such a good friend to our Oikawa!”

You follow them outside where they immediately attacked Oikawa about how handsome he looked serving the ball

His friend Iwaizumi just stood a little aside and looked more than uncomfortable, like he’d rather be somewhere else

So you decided to test your luck and walked towards him, still a little hesitant. “You know, I think you actually rocked this game a lot more than him”

Iwaizumi looked up in surprise, his a little widened as he scanned your appearance as if he was trying to remember where he knew you from. “Y/N, right?”

You nod and he leans his head back against the gym door. “Thanks for the words, but today was not really one of my good days. I’ve definitely played better matches.”

“Well, I can understand that it’s distracting to hear these high-pitched screams, I know I wouldn’t be able to focus on anything hearing that.”

You both look over to where the girls where still cooing over Oikawa, asking if he’s injured or feels a little sick. They all had a bentobox they handed him

“You get used to it after a while, though I can never help but gag a little whenever I see one of his fangirls.”

You laugh and suddenly a blush appears on Iwaizumis face as he realized he was talking to a cute girl. Your laugh sounded like bells of heaven ringing in his ears and he can’t help but feel his skin burn up with you around

“It’s a pity we’re in the same class and yet never really talked.”

“Didn’t we both work on a project together in first year?”

“I didn’t think you would remember.” Your throat gets a little dry as you smile at him.

Indeed, he looks very attractive with his hair slightly damp and sticking to his forehead, little drops of sweat spread all over his face and his jersey also sticking to his muscular torso. You had trouble keeping your eyes up.

“Would you... would you like to go out some time?”, he suddenly asks, scartching the back of his neck with one arm.

“Some time?”

“Mmmhhh ... Now? I could go and take a quick shower if you’d wait.”

“Or we could just escape the fangirls now and leave right away? I don’t care if you’re sweaty.” (Yes, ma’am)

Again he looks at you in surprise, but very quickly his face lights up with a big smile that makes your heart jump. “Yes, of course.”