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#it just made me more mentally ill
fenithephoenix · 9 months
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Never knew how lucky I was to play games like Pokemon Scarlet and BOTW/TOTK, being able to just fuck around and find out and frolick freely while having 1. Instant teleportation, 2. An excellent navigation system, and 3. NO WEIGHT LIMITS TO WHAT I CAN CARRY
Now my inner hoarder is suffering in The Long Dark, shedding tears as I drop scrap metal I picked up on my travels because WHAT IF I NEED IT LATER
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stil-lindigo · 5 months
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
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thecmaly · 1 month
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can't even cat nap in peace 😾
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more windbreaker comics
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ohgreat-moretapes · 19 days
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Tim I noticed a lot of indigenous patches on your jacket, are you Native?
Idk what my dad was 'cause I never knew him, but yeah my mom is (or... Was.. I guess..) Muscogee, the tribe native to the part of Alabama I'm in.
If I remember correctly she came to Alabama from Oklahoma (where a lot of Natives were displaced to in the 1800s) to "get back to her roots."
But yknow, I was separated from her in childhood (which tbh is upsettingly common for Native families) and I was raised in a very white very Catholic asylum so I'm not as connected to the culture as I'd like to be.
-Tim
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nookisms · 7 months
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Oops. It's a second headcanon compilation!
Don't worry, the next one will be back to our normal schedule of regular text posts and not headcanons
Masterpost
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uncanny-tranny · 1 year
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Choosing to be alive is a hard task sometimes, so I'm always so proud of people who choose to live for "weird" reasons.
Like, yes! Live to watch your favourite show for the millionth time! Yes! Live to hear rain against your car windshield! Live to laugh, to cry, to make Naruto proud! Do all of this to live, no matter how strange it is. You enrich this world, and no matter what you are living for, it is good enough. I am so incredibly amazed at your resolve, and your sheer willpower. I hope you never forget that part about your spirit because it is spectacular.
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al-luviec · 2 months
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juvie buddies
#alek art#td duncan#td mal#total drama#total drama all stars#(if i want to get technical)#2024#duncan is around 15 here... mal is around 16#ive thought really hard about them these past few days . in my brain they actually knew each other and canon is different#duncan and mike got along really well. in juvie mal refused to speak to anyone about anything and would fight as many people as he could .#he wanted to stay in there and far away from home . they get roomed together and duncan is the first person who mal can talk to . he isnt#scared of him . he relates to him a lot . like -> wow we both act out for attention and people think we are terrible because of it#duncan being a mentally ill teenager seeing mal an also very mentally ill teenager thought 'i can fix him' . mike and duncan speak too here#i cant really see anyone else fronting besides those two . their brain was on lockdown and mike wanted out so bad . i see manitoba as a#gatekeeper so hed handle some sessions with their psych. i want to say they (duncan and mike) get moved to a psyche ward just because#i have more knowledge on being in one and how it goes ... but yeah i like duncan mal a lot . this art isnt ship whatsoever though 🙏 i dont#see them as a couple their dynamic is just better as friends imo#but anyways in all stars they obviously recognize each other but have an unspoken agreement not to say anything abt it#duncan is a known criminal but mike isnt like that . mike hadnt even told zoey about that part of his life . so duncan wanted to respect his#privacy -> then mal starts hurting people and he has to step in . mal isnt a good person by any means but i dont think he was that bad in#juvie . so duncan had to come to terms that his friend wasnt the same person he was years ago (in all stars duncan is ~18 and i think mike#is almost 20... so it had been a while since they last talked)#them getting each other like no other and being in pain because they couldnt really speak . i see them having a conversation still in moon#madness abt their past and history . god i just think abt them and their wasted potential wdym mike and duncan were in juvie together#duncan was in for trespassing or destruction of private property or something really dumb . mal fought his parent(s) and got in for assault#mal was already in when duncan was placed . and duncan was let out early on good behavior + his parents (dad) mostly did it to teach him a#lesson . wrong of them or otherwise . so mal was just kinda stuck there until they realized he was actually not right in the head . think he#knew abt their DID but was only diagnosed in juvie and had to go from there . tbh he shouldve been tried as an adult but td logic . doesnt#matter dw guys . mike gets the 'was put on random meds that made him go braindead' treatment bc that was me . post mental hospital abilify#had me messed up
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skitskatdacat63 · 5 months
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Roleswap anyone??
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Tell me Fernando wouldn't make a fantastic general/emperor, and that Napoleon wouldn't make a fanastic driver/tp!!
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thyandrawrites · 5 months
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It's all about Nagi living alone in a tiny one bedroom, one bathroom apartment with zero personality and Reo having a whole floor for himself but still living surrounded by tacky-expensive home decor with no apparent traces of his actual personality, either. It's all about how Nagi's parents haven't visited him in 2 years nor taken an interest in his life since, while Reo's are content to live floors apart from their teenage son, only taking an interest in what value he can bring to Mikage Corp but being otherwise uninvolved in / dismissive of his actual life. It's all about them being surrounded by people and still not knowing how to form a meaningful connection with another person before meeting each other. It's all about them being so starved for genuine human warmth to combat their bone-deep loneliness that they both treasure memories of tiny, inconsequential moments where they were spending time with their parents. Something something it's this line,
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and how it describes them both despite being said about Reo. It's them being awkward 17-year-olds who had never before had an equal who would just respect them as they are and unconditionally look their way. In this essay I will-
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bunnihearted · 14 days
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being too weird and unlikable and off putting and always being shunned and turned into an outcast everywhere i go and not having felt the connection and healing friendship has on you for so many years has really done a number on me
#irl mostly. but even online. i cannot connect or find communities or support systems the way most of u can#even if i do have found great connections and one connection in particular im more than grateful for#but i have had so much of my humanness torn off for so long that i am awkward and useless in handling it#but yeah idk :/ im just so profoundly jealous of how everyone can just fit into a slot#even online when ppl talk abt being anxious and stuff they still have ppl to talk to#or ppl irl to hang out with and im like.. wow... i cant even do that :/#it is just so lonely in general. and it has made me confused and incapable of knowing how to be a human#and fully realise and actualize the one connection i do have#if i had gotten to learn and now know how to be a human and a person i would've... been a person#but now i feel so removed and far away from that idek how...#like im at a point where i cant even have simple and shallow conversations online bc im like so useless#maybe only other ppl with avpd and who have been socially rejected and isolated and alienated can fully understand what i mean#it is so scary and weird and i feel such deep envy for how people can just like... talk to eo. irl and online. i dont get it#and like the connection i do have that i mention bc it is so important to me.. that does all of those things#but it is like im so not used to anyone even keep wanting to have a connection with me#that i feel like bambi on ice 💀 for lack of a better metaphor#and inside of me idk how to dare to open up to it bc i've been numb and shut off i just dont know#i dont know. but i want to but idk how.#ahhhhhh wanna scream bc just trying to describe it so i can make sense of it is frustrating!!!!#it also sucks bc other ppl really dont seem to get how fkn weird and scary it is to feel so removed from humanness#and not even be able to do most basic human people things most ppl who are mentally ill or anxious do.. i cant even do that idk#talking and communicating is the main thing like ppl do not understand how fkn hard it is for me to even have a simple convo#and i cant explain it bc theres no way someone who doesnt feel the same and have avpd could get it...#but idk. i just hate all of this and i wish i had a normal functioning brain. i just wanna be like everyone else#even ppl w social anxiety are capable of having friends. and im terrified of losing the only connection i've somehow been lucky to get#in my hands??? im so scared of losing that but idk HOW to be a person and idk!!! idk!!#other ppl dont even think abt these things im so fkn jealous lmao#anyway whatever 😔
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lovesickeros · 4 months
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lord its so dark in here the sahara desert of tsaritsa content you are like a shining oasis. your characterisation of her compels me & mihoyo would be hard pressed to top it imo.!! caaaaan i humbly request yr thoughts on her first meeting w a reader of any kind, or maybe even multiple kinds (sagau, sagau god au, isekai, etc) if you so desire...
it really is like a desert here. being the fan of a character we aren't getting until the last damn nation is driving me up a wall but i will persevere bc if nothing else i support morally bankrupt women in media. we r in a severe drought over here but i do my best. unfortunately nothing i say is ever coherent so pull out your translation notes its abt 2 be messy
also this got out of hand but thats bc first meetings w the tsaritsa are tricky to write + a LOT of her characterization lies in deeper exploration then just surface level yknow...NOT A DIG AT YOU this is just my excuse for rambling. gently pats the tsaritsa she can hold so much complexity i do not have the word count to delve into it completely :]
gonna talk cult au for a bit here though because that's 99% of my content. and honestly? she thrives in sub au's of the cult au like villain au + imposter au. it's basically made for her. i mean, early days, the imposter au had been going around for a little while but one of the first few ideas was the Fatui taking reader in so like. it kinda technically actually was. pretty sure cult au Tsaritsa popped up because of the imposter au. a lot of it's writers kinda left though which. man am i getting old or.
anyway.
there isn't much of a chance her first impression is all that positive. at best it's usually neutral, imo, but rarely if ever positive. specifically because i view the Tsaritsa as someone who isn't as fanatical as most of the acolytes typically are towards the creator. she's not exactly going to worship the ground you walk on unlike a certain geo lizard. which is partially why i think she thrives in the sub au's i mentioned.
imposter au, for example. she meets you at your lowest. there's no gaudy extravagance or pampering from the acolytes waiting for you because your own acolytes have turned on you. for all intents and purposes you aren't a "god" at all. which is why i don't think she meshes well with normal cult au reader. the Fatui are made up of outcasts, basically, and imposter au slots right in just perfectly. you're weak, at your lowest, when you meet the Fatui in the imposter au. and the Fatui can help you, too.
a mutual exchange, really. the Tsaritsa sees a tool she can use to one up the rest of the nations and especially Archons, and she has no qualms about you using her and the Fatui in turn. you both want something out of it, after all. whether you just want to be safe from the rest of the acolytes, or you want revenge, or whatever else..she'll give you the power to fulfill it, and she gains the strongest piece on the chessboard when all is said and done.
the best way i can describe the first meeting is "practical", i suppose. she sees an opportunity in you. the ultimate gamble. because if she "saves" you, and you dont trust anyone else because they tried to kill you, well..she holds all the cards, doesn't she?
but the Tsaritsa, imo, is just as capable of being just as fanatical towards you as anyone else. she just won't worship you as the creator. but as yourself? clawing your way back to your divine power and taking back what belongs to you? the Tsaritsa is, to me, a character who's character flourishes in long-term fics more because she changes a LOT between "just met reader" and after having been with reader for some time. she's practically apathetic at the beginning but a lot of her character, in my characterization, shines through LONG after the first meeting.
#asks#Anonymous#sagau#tsaritsa#like. am i explaining this coherently?? first meetings r GOOD and i could go on a tangent of like. first meetings w zl and make it work#but first meetings w the tsaritsa is like. you just cooked a 5 course meal. took one bite. called it a day.#so much of my characterization lies in the “after” of the first meeting#because her first meetings are generally the same. she's apathetic at best!! she does not gaf abt the creator in the SLIGHTEST#but show that you are more then the creator? that you do not cling to the title like a shield? that you do not rely on it?#youve got the worst person youve ever known ready to kill a man for you.#tsaritsa is very like. EXTREMELY hard to earn the trust of but when you do she will kill someone for you no hesitation no question#which is why she works SO WELL in villain au and imposter au!!!!!!!!!#esp if theres a fake “creator” calling you the imposter. she hates their ass and was .5 seconds from dethroning them anyway#you just made it 10x easier#also cant do just first meetings bc i am incapable of not shoving themes of love into every fic w her SORRY#tsaritsa going on a full multiple month long mental breakdown bc she is not in love with you but she would destroy everything for u..#(shes in denial)#tsaritsa and complex themes of love and what it means for the god of love to be incapable of feeling it + what it means when reader shows u#LIKE UGHHHHHH okay. i guess ill write another tsaritsa fic and put it in my vault#aka my drafts#i hold so many fics hostage there its crazy#this answered like 0 of ur questions sorry i see tsaritsa and black out and this happens#i just think first meetings dont let her character really come thru but my response got out of hand so uhhhhh everyone look away. please#putting tape over my mouth now so i shut up before this gets worse#basically tsaritsa gravitates more towards outcast reader rather then one who has already become accustomed to the adoration of the acolyte#does that make sense........#i havent slept in forever and im running on nothing but spite and dreams atp dont expect coherency when it comes 2 the tsaritsa from me#head in hands someone please stop me i keep rambling abt the tsaritsa it makes me go NUTS#lays down. explodes
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This has probably been said before, but the parallel of Suletta reaching out to a battered and hurt Miorine in both this scene and in Planet Quetta, complete with the exact same small, polite little smile, is just. screams in agony
In planet Quetta, Suletta's hands were bloody. She didn't understand what she just did. She still loved Miorine, but she loved blindly, too caught up in Prospera's plans. And this made her love dangerous and uncanny for everyone around her. Yes, she extended her hand, but it was as if Prospera were extending that hand and not her.
Here, Suletta extends her hand from a place of understanding. She finally understands the motives of her mother and Miorine, and she's ready to re-forge her bonds with Miorine without them being bound to Prospera's plans. She loves, but doesn't love blindly, and with her newfoud wisdom she can use her incredible amounts of love for everybody around her to protect them. She extended her hand and took a step forward on her own.
This show makes me want to shove every knife in my knife drawer down my fucking throat. AUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHH
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noah-price · 6 months
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@pscentral​ event 26: minimalism
SILICON VALLEY (2014 - 2019) TOP 10 RATED EPISODES ON IMDB insp (1, 2)
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shokupanda · 2 months
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me when time moves forward at a steady pace: how the fuck is it more than halfway through july already. this fuckers rapidly sprinting when im not looking huh
#i have so many things i need to do#before the semester starts again this fall#i need to work on comms. i need to work on a project due the end of the month. i want to do artfight. i want to make art for myself. i want#to do art studies. i want to start an alt drawing more suggestive stuff. i mean what who said that mustve been the wind#and thats just the things related to drawing.#i need to organize my room. i need to learn [redacted]. i want to cook more. i want to socialize more. i want to play games. i want to-#watch and read and listen to so many things#yet i have a finite amount of time to do everything#and half of a day is consumed by me just snoozing#and when i do work on something i feel like im Not Efficient Enough.#i cant just chill in vcs i need to be productive and draw too. and if i dont make significant progress then I Have Failed.#i cant just watch New Season of Show. thats Time Focused on One Singular Activity. gotta do multiple things at once or ill feel bad after#because i know that once the semester starts back up then im gonna be 90% less online#back to the depths of graphic design hell making infographics and powerpoints and brand identities#not having the time to draw anything furry or for myself for several months#anywho its 5am#i should go to sleep#sorry for the ramble im just. only now realizing how little time i have#when i wake up i have to really lock in on drawing and stuff#ive wasted so much time playing a game this past week#if i hadnt played it idve made so much more progress by now and im kicking myself so bad mentally now that im like mostly done w the game#gahhh#anywho yeah sorry for the ramble ill post more soon#sho.scramblin
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deoidesign · 2 months
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HI I think I sent an ask a while back about having recently found TaTA and a) if it came off as trying to rush/guilt you. I am so sorry because that was NOT my intent, and b) I can hugely guarantee you have at least one person who will eat up any return, no matter when it happens, because I care about the guys so much 🥺 really looking forward to whatever comes next!!
Oh, I appreciate this a lot thank you!
Tbh it's a stress I would have regardless of anyone asking me about it, I'm probably the biggest one rushing and guilting myself on it. Which might contribute to some of the burnout I had...
My complaints are more about people who are demanding "more content daddy" or asking me if I'm dead or asking on every single post I make where it is... Wondering when it's coming back is completely reasonable, it's been a long time! but there's definitely a line haha
my editor also keeps randomly scheduling me and then saying "oh, btw you're scheduled to return in 3 weeks. Is that alright?" And I have to keep saying no, that's not alright??? And then dealing with that process...
I could write an essay about all the reasons it's not back yet, but that doesn't help me feel any less pressured, and it doesn't help you all get the rest of the comic any faster...
As of right now I'm scheduled to and trying to return october 21. No official announcement yet cause I have to do a lot of work in that time, but it's my official goal at least. When we get closer I'll be able to say for sure whether it's coming back on that date!
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skinnypaleangryperson · 6 months
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Bojack Horseman is the last piece of media that I would have expected to have a consistently enduring fandom. It's pretty much non-existent on an average day on Tumblr, but it's obnoxiously popular on other forms of media daily, and it kind of feels like tumblr is dying out in most content anyway, and even on here there's still a decent amount of content that's posted daily that is decent enough for a piece of media that was canceled years ago and wasn't super popular or mainstream even when I was out. It impresses me daily, it's a good thing, since BoJack is the love of my life anyway and is boring as it is, really all that I need for the rest of my sad, lonely, pathetic life.
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