#it started as an inverse capture fic

[lexosaurus]

Hi! For posterity, I’d like to say that I’m a cringe little baby boy who hasn’t really used ffn for anything but LOZ fix’s, which are a whole different story. I’d like to check out some of the older works, but I’d like to be sure of what I’m reading. If you don’t mind, could you tell me about a couple of common ship nicknames in this fandom or ones that I should definitely know about? I’m bad at understanding most references, so I’m sorry if they’re like, secretly super obvious.

Omg haha you're so fine!

The big ones you'll run into the most are going to be:

Amethyst Ocean = Danny/Sam

Gray Ghost = Danny/Valerie

Swagger Bishie (older) and Teddy Ghost (newer) = Danny/Dash

Savant Par = Danny/Tucker

Pompous Pep = Vlad/Danny (non-platonic)

Badger Cereal = Vlad&Danny (mentor & mentee, or father & son)

Pink Astronaut = Danny/Paulina

Dark Gray = Valerie/Dan

Pitch Pearl = Danny Phantom/Danny Fenton

Everlasting Trio = Danny/Sam/Tucker (rarely can also be platonic Danny&Sam&Tucker)

Family Breakfast = Maddie/Jack/Vlad

You didn't ask, but you should know that we are HUGE on our AU's. If you run into some terms you don't recognize, here's what they could mean:

Corpse AU: When Danny dies, he leaves behind a body.

Dissection Fic: Danny gets captured by his parents or the GIW

Dual Obsession AU: Danny has two obsessions: protection (or similar), and space

Electric Core AU: Instead of ice powers, Danny gets electricity powers from the portal.

Everyone Knows AU: Danny was revealed (typically not through Phantom Planet)

Ghost King AU: After defeating Pariah Dark, Danny is next in line to be the ghost king.

(Half) Human AU: Danny starts out as a ghost, and the portal turns him into a (half) human.

Hazmat AU: Danny dies in a full hazmat suit

No One Knows AU: Danny was alone during the accident

Portal AU: Danny is the ghost portal.

Reverse/Inverse Trio: Role reversal! Either Tucker or Sam is the halfa.

[mega-ringsandthings-world]

Ok, ok, glad you liked the art! There's more to come because I am full of ideas and sadness! Prepare!

Anywho, now that I have rambled about the boys a lot (and trust me, there's definitely more where that came from), I thought I'd take a change of pace and focus on others.

Like Buggy. What we know is he escapes, possibly due to running away (which will probably haunt him forever) or getting saved by someone. He does meet someone, as you've said before, but who? Could it be Dragon? Does our greedy, narcissistic clown somehow become a revolutionary? Maybe it's a marine. Did a marine see this kid and go, "Screw it, I'm not killing kids," and let him go? Does he run into Smoker? Start a traumatize boy band (now I wanna write the fic we’re buggy and smoker run into each other after lougetown.) Or is it someone else, someone I wouldn't have guessed in a million years? Doflamingo, perhaps? That would be the meeting from hell. One of the other would-be warlords? And what happens to him? Does he spend the next two years trying to help Shanks in any way he can? Does he do mostly what he's done in canon and go for the One Piece? Or is he a warlord? Did he make deals with the world government for Shanks? ‘Gasp’ I'm gasping at nothing but thinky thoughts, but eh, I'll just throw some crazy in there for fun.

Also, are you going to add pirates we know to Loguetown who get caught, aside from the characters we already know? There are a few characters we see in canon that could be the right age to have been around. You could just slip them in there to add more people to the "Fun Time with World Government!™️" and more people Shanks and Mihawk can bounce off of while captured and once they get out. You said that they won't trust anyone who didn't go through what they went through, so not a lot of allies or having civil conversations. But maybe that's the point... oh well, whatever you do, I'm sure I'll love it.

Also, this pirate generation needs a name. If the last generation were the Great Pirates, maybe this generation could be the Silenced Generation? And later, after the two years, the Monster Generation.

And propaganda, does Roger's message about the One Piece get out there like it did in the main timeline? Not a lot of people escaped from the excision, so that's not a lot of people to spread the word. Is the World Government suppressing it after all? They didn't mean for Roger to tell the crowd, so why in hell would they want that driving force that created pirates who are specifically seeking a piece of the Void Century and possibly information on Joy Boy or Nika? So, do they turn it into, instead of a last word, a rumor? Like Davy Jones or Nolan and his Sky Island, like it's a fun bedtime story but nothing that's actually real.

Those are all the questions I have today hopefully I’ll get you that new art out soon no promises but I will try! Seriously thanks for indulging my asks, I know you don’t ow me any of you time and it’s cool that you’ve given me some. Anyways off to dreamland for me!

Prepared and so excited! See, with Buggy, it's a mess. If this AU is the sort-of inverse of canon events, Buggy has to keep his beef with Shanks. That happens because Shanks is the one who saves him. He gets him to safety, and then gets himself caught to lead the marines away from him. But from Buggy's perspective, Shanks abandoned him. Which. He's going to spend his time torn between grief/worry/resentment and thinking Shanks got what he deserved, (because Buggy is vindictive like that) only to find out how wrong he was. During the end of the two years, he's going to try to help Shanks, though. Him and Smoker do meet, Smoker being the one to spur him into helping Shanks. Smoker is going to go the way of Vergo in this AU, at least as far as the marines are concerned. Dragon is going to pick up some key players, (wink, wink) and he would save a child. So that's Buggy, even though Buggy doesn't espouse revolutionary ideas. (and Buggy would be even more obsessed with the one piece, it's his way of coping) And here's the thing, once what the marines are doing starts coming out, there's going to be an alliance between the revolutionaries and pirates to protect themselves. Because after the marines get information out of the captured pirates, they will start hunting the free ones. Benn Beckmann is already around, and some other characters will come sooner, some later. Garp is going to be the one who brings Mihawk and Shanks and some of those characters together. It will take them a long time to trust anyone else, but they will. And the pirates who weren't captured but were still hunted count as having a shared experience in their books. As well as the people who have been hurt by or due to the government, especially children. (wink, wink) I was thinking the Ghost generation! Since the marines kept an entire swathe of these people in captivity for two-three years, living as nothing more than ghosts. The one piece declaration did get out, though yes, the WG is trying to make it seems like nothing more than the ravings of a madman. It still becomes a substantial rumor, though, because it's something for the the pirates left to cling onto while they are being hunted. And the WG also wants the one piece. So it's them, and not the pirates that initially began the search. They go out systematically raiding pirate ships and hideouts and work their way up from there. When Mihawk and Shanks get out, Shanks kicks off the real pirate hunt by confirming Roger's last words. Which he does for Buggy's sake. No rush! And you're welcome! Ask away as much as you want, my mind is full of this and I'll literally talk forever if given the chance!

[jichanxo]

re:titles> and i'm surprised how people name their projects after they are done! for me, it's easier to centre a story around one or several words, and harder to fit a whole-ass completed story into a really short description. how does it work for you then? (and good luck with senseific's title, i know you can do it)

this got long. uh.

that makes sense in a way, having it picked out early is just picking out your point of focus so that whatever you write matches what you’re trying to convey (at least that’s how I’m understanding you?) I suppose the inverse, deciding late, is more like going with the flow and seeing what surfaces as the most important theme/imagery/whatever… though I can definitely understand it being difficult to pick out what’s the most important part when you’ve written a lot. I guess in the end it’s about decisiveness? or at the very least picking something that Does The Job. Not all of them can be winners after all.

in cases where the fic title is the same as phrasing within the text (3:21am, Passing Grade, Memorisation Game), it feels more natural to see what words come naturally through writing as opposed to deciding beforehand. It’s certainly a bit literal but it captures what I think are the defining features of those fics.

“3:21am” is from the setting, which is incidental really, but it sets the scene well enough.

“Passing Grade” refers to the Kitakata sensei au (so school themed) and is also a direct quote from Yagami’s flirting in that fic.

“Memorisation Game” is a reference to the emotional core of that fic – Yagami missing Kuwana, rationalising his attempt to call his number as a game so not to feel so pathetic about it.

For reference, my document titles for these fics are: “yagami late 3am.docx” (referring to the pov and the setting), “kuwagami sensei eating.docx” (referring to the au and the main thing I use to get them to interact for that fic), and “kuwagami card fic.docx” (the initial idea being about yagami keeping kuwana’s business card). It’s a little funny how blunt they are, but it makes it easy to understand at a glance what everything is.

I guess the commonality here is that you can see what my starting idea is from the document titles, but by looking at the title of the posted fics, you can see where my writing ended up in terms of emotions or themes. “card fic” is the idea I started with, the instrument to get the ball rolling, but by the end of the writing, the final, most clear idea within that fic was memorisation game. I had some idea it was going to end in that direction, but I didn’t have those exact words until I wrote them out.

It’s probably a similar process for my other titles, and not just the literal ones, now that I think about it.

“kuwagami deep wound.docx” refers to the imagery I was trying to use in that fic which became → Wound Pried Open, which is… similar, but the “pried open” part I think calls attention to the idea of Kuwana doing it, of it being on purpose, not just the wound itself but the process of agitating it intentionally, which is… more important than just a reference to the wound on its own. I started that fic thinking “man the kuwagami stuff I make is so clean, I should write something more grimy” and ended it with… well… wounds as a vehicle to explore this idea of painful intimacy.

So I suppose what I’m saying is that deciding later leaves room for me to find the core of the story naturally after starting from my initial idea.

[sugarrushproductions]

I need help

Ok, I need help finding a group of fics that I read years ago when I first found out about fanfics. It was really well done and there were at least four, but only a pair told the whole story.

There was one featuring Mateo x Elena and Gabe x Naomi. The one paired with it was a Sofia x Cedric (aged up and down respectively. I think at the time of the Elena one, that one comes first, Sofia is 14 and Cedric is 16)

But there's also the inverse of that with the same story. It would be Gabe x Elena and Mateo x Naomi. And for the Sofia one, she's with Hugo instead. I don't know what changes were made with that one, I didn't read those.

The story in the Elena one, which comes first, is that Elena must choose a suitor before she becomes queen. And Shuriki is already planning her comeback and is less evil than her show counterpart. By the end, Elena ends up with who she wants and Shuriki with Esteban in a house they can't leave. In that, James and Isabel promise to be together later in life. In the Mateo x Elena one, Cedric and Sofia help lead the charge to save Elena from Shuriki- at least from the side character point of view.

I do like the story of the second one a bit better. For the Cedfia one, it's a sort of Beauty and the Beast fic. Cedric succeeds in taking over the kingdom, sending Marranda and Baileywick into hiding in Elvenmore. The kids begin trying to take him down from the underground, Sofia becoming the leader and a sort of legend.

Eventually she gets captured by Cedric and that's when the beauty and the beast stuff starts. Especially since they used to be friends, he of course treats her kindly. There's also a plot of Cedric meeting different Disney villains for advice. Including Captain Hook, the Evil Queen, and the Horned King (which I gather is from the Black Cauldron). I think that movie also plays a big part in the ending.

Please help me find this, I wanna read it again!

[essayofthoughts]

Is there anything in Percy’s canon characterization that you dislike/disagree with that you try to “fix” within your own writing of him?

Not really. If anything part of what motivates me to write at times is seeing other people write versions of Percy that seem OOC to me - cases where they make him too gentle or too straightforward or a dick in the complete opposite way to how he is in canon. It's like seeing a warped mirror: it lets me more clearly see the particular ways in which Percy is a fascinating mess.

Which is what it comes down to, really - I like Percy as a character because he's a mess, because his flaws are just his good traits pushed to the logical extreme. His confidence becomes arrogance, his sense of responsibility becomes hubris, his self-awareness of his flaws and errors can make him self-loathing. These aren't contradictions - these are just... all his good traits pushed to their negative inversions. It's fantastic character building and serious kudos to Taliesin for pulling it off. It makes it a challenge to write him at times, especially if it's a story where I'm pushing him far out of his usual shape, because I want him to still be recogniseable and it's a trick to balance the traits he retains with the ones that change.

Honestly, the greater problem I have writing Percy is that if I get too far into his head I start understanding his way of thinking too well and follow along with his internal justifications even when, if I were watching from the outside, I'd want to shake him by the shoulders and yell. But well - that just means I'm writing well, I think, if the logic makes such sense as I almost find myself agreeing with it, even when he's being a right pillock.

I've said it to a few of my friends but while I love Percy as a character if I met him as an IRL person I'd want to push him down a flight of stairs within minutes. And that's... that's what I want to capture. This person who can be clever and considerate and charming... and who can be just the biggest bastard at times as well.

It's a dichotomy I find engaging and I don't want to fix him. At times I want to make him grow - but he does that very well in canon, and even if we fully grow through all our flaws, work on all of them, I don't think there's such a thing as a truly perfect, fixed person who won't annoy at least someone. I'm sure someone found even Buddha annoying - certainly people found (and still find) Christ annoying.

The flaws are what make people real. I'm sure there's consistent things I change about Percy as I write him, but I am genuinely making a consistent effort to keep him as absolutely in character as I possibly can, because that's the version of him that's the most interesting to me. If you want to know what I change or fix about him - you'd be better off asking my followers or people who read my work.

So, with that in mind - who here wants to pitch in what they think I tend to change about Percy in my fics?

[seyaryminamoto]

Matching Heartbeats: Sokkla Saturdays 2020

Day 5: “I melt in your hands”

On FF.net//On AO3

So. It really had come to this. Of all things, her first mission ever truly had to turn out like this.

She hadn't underestimated him when he had nearly shattered her bones with his club, had she been careless enough to stand closer to him or failed to evade his attack. No properly-trained firebender would ever be quite so stupid as to believe themselves superior to heavy weapons, especially one that looked as heavy as that damn club. Yet she had expected he would only be a warrior, at the time: she never expected him to be the brains of his group, for this was merely their second encounter, and while she was still assessing the enemy as they crossed blows in the abandoned town the Avatar had lured her to, she had never quite expected… well, that there would be a truly smart foe in the other team, to put it in some way.

"I know when I'm beaten," she had said, eyeing the group that surrounded her, her hands raised in the air. "A Princess surrenders with honor."

She had noticed they were whispering, though: just as she saw Iroh had been focusing on the earthbender, that tall warrior boy had spoken to the short, new member of their team too: the waterbender and the Avatar were listening as well, her brother, of course, was only focused on her… so many potential targets, what to do?

She chose to attack Iroh in the end, but it happened just as the earthbender attacked, too: a sudden surge of earth, and all her limbs had been restrained, held down: she tried to evoke fire, but the strain of this completely awkward position, prostrated on the ground, didn't allow for it.

"Quick! Look for something to tie her up, I don't know…!" the warrior boy had ordered… just as her brother screamed:

"AAAAAAH!"

Ugh. He was always so melodramatic.

She struggled against the restraints… only for the earthbender to take things further: she found herself buried to the neck in the ground, gasping for breath, panicking as she realized she couldn't move at all. What to do, what to do…? There had to be a way out, she just had to think…

"I found shackles!" exclaimed the waterbender, from inside one of the buildings: she and the Avatar had taken to rummaging through the nearby ghostly town to follow fit with the warrior's demand.

"Great! That'll be way better than rope, she'd just burn through that…"

"Oh… wait, Zuko!"

The waterbender returned with the shackles, but she handed them to the Avatar as she approached the firebenders: Azula's brother was crouched by their Uncle's inert form… and upon realizing the Avatar and his friends were approaching him, he shouted:

"Ugh! Get away from us!"

"Zuko, I can help!"

"LEAVE!" he exclaimed, and now he outright attacked them: wow, that was rude. And here Azula thought they were friends… it would explain why he had been so incompetent as to fail to capture them throughout the past months.

Yet just as she thought Zuko would get what he wanted, and she'd be left buried in this damn place for eternity, the tall warrior boy turned towards her. Azula scowled at him too, and he huffed, hands on his hips.

"No way we're leaving. Not without our prisoner, anyway," he said, stepping towards her.

"I'm not your…! You'd best stay where you are, or I'll make you pay for this!" she exclaimed, knowing her bravado was empty. What could she do, spit fire at his boots? Maybe he'd be outraged about it… and then he might outright kick her face. Which would be utterly deplorable and humiliating. What on earth had just happened? Why was she in this completely unacceptable situation?

"You know, I can move those shackles with my bending, lock them around her wrists underground," the earthbender revealed, with a mischievous grin. "That way she's not going to be a problem!"

"Wait, wait, wait!" the Avatar said, eyeing them all warily. "Are we… going to make her our prisoner? Really? But… why?"

"I'm with Aang on that. Why do we want her with us?" the waterbender asked, eyeing her fellow Water Tribesman – who Azula suspected would be her brother – and the earthbender with utter confusion.

"Well… to change up the game somewhat? It's always the Fire Nation trying to capture us, right? And this way, we know this one's not going to catch us again," the warrior suggested. "Not if we keep an eye on her ourselves."

"Ridiculous… my friends will find me. And then they'll defeat the whole lot of you without breaking a sweat," Azula said, with a proud smirk. "And if, somehow, you managed to avoid them, every Fire Nation soldier will attempt to find me once my captivity is known. You won't get away with this, and you'll pay for it with your lives, whether by my hand or anyone else's."

"You sure?" he had asked, raising his eyebrows. "Because, hey! We're already being chased by a lot of Fire Nation people and so far, we're doing pretty good! Honestly, you and your friends were the scariest ones to chase us so far, so it kind of feels like you were the best the Fire Lord could send already? Which means… now that we took you down, we're feeling pretty good about our odds against everything else they could send at us."

He smiled sardonically. She scowled, angrily. And while the Avatar and the waterbender appeared unconvinced still, they soon surrendered, and the damned warrior boy got his way: she was shackled and unearthed afterwards, and while she could presumably wield basic fire against them, she couldn't possibly perform a full kata within these restraints. She'd have to use more than firebending to escape… she'd have to use her wits. And that she intended to.

She would leave a trail of breadcrumbs for Mai and Ty Lee to follow. It was hard to decide on which breadcrumbs, but eventually she took to lightly burning the ends of her hair, by raising her shackled hands to wipe her face. The hairs would be in danger of floating off their own accord in the breeze, but hopefully they wouldn't be blown away too fast for her friends to follow her trail, much as they had followed the damn bison's…

And soon enough they wound up on said damn bison who, to Azula's chagrin, was fully clean now, and apparently not shedding anymore. It growled at her, and she scowled at it too. Shaggy beast…

And then she got dragged up to the saddle, where the three benders fell asleep, and the non-bender, despite having huge bags under his eyes, decided to stay awake and keep watch, for she couldn't be trusted. And of course she couldn't be: who wouldn't be mistrusting of their captive foe? It was natural. She had to figure out a way to turn that caution of his against him… or turn it into something else, instead.

"You look terrible. I bet you're far more handsome when you've had a few hours of rest," she said: men were fools in many ways. Perhaps a girl's compliments, however shallow as they might be, would sit well with him.

The reaction was just as she had expected it: that her plan would work at all, however, was rather startling: he was visibly flustered, eyeing her with uncertainty, but he appeared perfectly shyly pleased by the compliment nonetheless.

"Well, yeah… you'll likely see that later tomorrow, I guess, once I do get enough rest," he said, with a shrug. She did succeed at goading his ego, of course she did… perfect.

"Will I, now?" Azula replied, raising her eyebrows.

"Yeah… as long as you don't try to escape beforehand, anyway," he said, shrugging. Azula scoffed.

"What makes you think my friends won't find us before that?" she asked.

"That they haven't found us yet, I think," the warrior boy admitted, with an awkward grin. "You three dangerous ladies seemed pretty intense, but something – or rather, my instincts! – tell me that you're the brains of the group. Were you the one who decided to chase after us on that creepy machine? Where did you get something like that, in the first place? And those mounts… you've got to be some real top-of-the-line bounty-hunter or something, huh?"

"You think I'm a bounty-hunter?" she asked, amused. "So you don't see the family resemblance either?"

"Family resemblance…?" he said, blinking blankly. Azula raised her eyebrows. "Woah. Wait a minute, are you…? You're Zuko's sister? Hell, no, I don't see it!"

"Oh, really?" Azula smirked. He scoffed.

"You're way prettier, like, by a landslide. And you're smart. Huh. I think you got the family jackpot, come to think of it… which, huh, who knows why the Fire Lord's family has anything good in their lineage, but if there's anything at all, looks like you hogged it all up for yourself."

Despite everything, Azula laughed. Why did she laugh, she didn't know. The warrior chuckled too, scratching the back of his neck. Were they flirting, without meaning to? Or was this just honesty? She was having a hard time telling… for it was the first time any boy had called her pretty.

"Is that why you decided to keep me as a prisoner? Because you were smitten with me right away?" she smirked. The warrior scoffed. "It's alright, you can admit it…"

"And why would I admit something that's not true? I mean, come on, if it were a matter of being smitten, I'd much rather keep you chasing after me," he smirked. "Boys love the idea of being chased violently by beautiful girls."

"And girls love the idea of being hogged up possessively by handsome boys," Azula retaliated.

They both snorted. And then they laughed.

Was she seriously laughing with the enemy?

"Could you two idiots quit with the weird flirting and let me SLEEP?!"

Toph's shout certainly landed on its mark. Both a Princess and her new enemy-captor-possibly-new-friend merely nestled on a saddle quietly for a while, blushing and hoping the other one couldn't tell under de cover of darkness.

"Though…" she finally broke the silence about ten minutes later: she could tell he was still awake, and his head jolted towards her quickly. "Would be nice to know your names, at least. If nothing else."

"Oh… heh. I'm Sokka," he said, smiling awkwardly.

"Sokka, huh…?" she said, enjoying the sensation of uttering the foreign name's syllables. Curious feeling…

"And you're…?" he said, raising his eyebrows.

"Azula," she replied. Sokka eyed her appreciatively.

"Azula it is, then," he said, with a small smile. "Uh, the rest of us… the bison is Appa, the lemur is Momo, my sister there's Katara, and that's Aang, the Avatar, and…"

"Shut. UP!"

"… And the grumpy one's Toph."

"Right."

They did fall silent then… and the gears in the Princess's mind continued turning. No, this situation was far from ideal… but if she forged a bond, however basic it might be, with one of her captors, there was a far higher likelihood of escape than by only waiting for Mai and Ty Lee to find her. Those two usually were reliable enough… but who knew how far the breeze would blow the miserable trail she'd left behind herself. Not to mention, if that damn bison took off with them, she'd be as good as beyond their reach before long. No, this wouldn't do. She would find a way out of this situation by herself, and she'd obtain a ton of intel on the enemy in the process, too. It would be difficult to endure for a while… but it didn't hurt that the boy she'd chosen for her scheme wasn't that far from her type anyway. A little lankier than her preference, sure, but he could fill out more muscles with the years and…

And why was that even important? It wasn't. She had to focus.

That he was somewhat handsome – and she used both words quite loosely, no, she didn't like him, she wasn't a schoolgirl with a crush or anything like that – only helped matters anyway: she wouldn't have to feign her interest in him, at least, where it concerned his physical appeal to her. Everything else was a matter of delicately weaving a net of perfect deceit until he was so wrapped within her web that he'd be caught completely off-guard once she betrayed their fun little group…

It was just a matter of patience until the right moment to strike arrived. She wouldn't be a problem prisoner, she'd accept her fate… for now.

Flying on the bison was a strange, yet not entirely unwelcome experience, despite it practically sentenced her to not be found by her friends anytime soon. The group she was stuck with was… slightly strange, without a doubt. The waterbender often eyed her warily – she likely still disagreed with the notion of keeping her captive, and wanted nothing but to see Azula vanish from sight as soon as possible. The Avatar seemed careful too, but before long he started to talk more cheerfully, and Azula wondered if he had decided she was trustworthy already. The damn lemur had often climbed over her lap, and she had to shoo it only for the Avatar to laugh it off and say 'Momo was just happy to make a new friend'. As if she'd ever be friends with a large-eared rat…

The earthbender, to her surprise, seemed to be almost as new to the group as she was. She asked occasional questions about how things worked in the team, and it became apparent she had only joined them recently, just as Azula had suspected – her absence back in Omashu could have had many explanations, but that they'd only recruited her recently made perfect sense. And of course, the one she had decided would be her target was the non-bender… who was sleeping at the far end of the saddle, drooling awkwardly, with his limbs splayed in any direction, as though he were a carelessly discarded toy. She wondered how someone could rest in quite such relaxation when he had an enemy so close by… did he truly take their last conversation to signify she could be trusted? Or was it he trusted the rest of his companions to keep her in check? Or… perhaps he knew she wasn't stupid enough to try anything while hovering so many miles above ground, in foreign lands, when she had no idea where they were going.

"What exactly is our destination, if I can ask?" she sighed.

"We'll know when we get there," Katara said, simply. Azula's eyebrows twitched: this one was absolutely ruled out of her plan to earn goodwill from her captors. Anyone else would be fair game, save her. And that lemur. She really didn't like that flying rat.

They only reached that destination – a canyon – after about ten hours of flying, after which the bison apparently couldn't keep going any longer. Yet the Avatar seemed thrilled about where they'd wound up, and the warrior was also in a blissful mood after napping for most the day on the creature's saddle. Of course, the waterbender didn't stop giving Azula the stink-eye as they unpacked, though as the others seemed to be warming up to her, to a fault, Azula decided to poke the hornet wasps' nest instead of enduring the judgment and scowls.

"You really seem to dislike me quite strongly," she said, casually. "Which I find odd, seeing as it seems you've been chased by my brother for far longer than me, and yet you offered him a helping hand back when I attacked our uncle. Is it you feel threatened by my presence somehow, or…?"

"Threatened? Yes. Because I'm pretty sure you're exactly where you want to be," Katara rebuffed, shooting her another harsh glare. "And yeah, Zuko's been worse than you, so far. But that you're his sister doesn't help in the least. And I wasn't really offering my help to Zuko but to Iroh. He gave us a hand back in the North Pole, so…"

"Is that so…?" Azula asked, unable to mask her genuine outrage at those words. Katara scoffed.

"You do remember, still, that we're not your friends? You yourself said it, didn't you? Enemies and traitors, working together?"

"Right, but I just thought that perhaps you had a soft spot for Zuzu since he'd chased you for so many months… I figured maybe I had to up my game so I'd earn some goodwill around here, but I guess it's not that simple," Azula sighed. "Working against my nation seems to be the only way you'll trust me, huh?"

"And even then I don't think Katara will let go that easily," Aang said, smiling awkwardly, though he blinked a few times when his words were almost interrupted by a loud cackle: "Uh… Sokka?"

"Zuzu?! Y-you call him Zuzu?!"

Azula glanced at the warrior with unabashed amusement: he DEFINITELY was her target. And yet, to her surprise, the earthbender snickered too… and the waterbender snorted before covering her mouth with a hand. Oh, maybe this wouldn't be quite as bad as she had anticipated… if they could bond over trashing Zuko, she had plenty of material to work with.

"I wasn't laughing!" Katara exclaimed, and yet everyone laughed at her denial just as well.

"Of course I call him Zuzu," Azula smiled proudly, as Sokka gazed at her with brimming amazement. "I don't presume to know how it works in your culture, but in the Fire Nation, the younger sister's official job is to embarrass and torment her older brother as best she can."

"Oh, it's the same in the South Pole, surprisingly," Sokka declared, smirking at Katara, who stuck out her tongue in his direction. "Though it's true too that the older brother's job is to protect their little sister… a thankless job, but we are just that selfless."

"Pfft! You don't have to protect me! I can protect myself just fine, thank you very much!"

"Sure thing! You know, it's not just about combat, it's about everything else! Who's the one who goes hunting and foraging and finding food for us…?"

"The one who's ALWAYS hungry?"

"And who did you tell to get a job when YOU were hungry? That's right, it was me! And I went and got one, and nearly died in a STORM while you didn't get a job of your own, but did I complain? Not even once…!"

"You're complaining now…" Toph pointed out, smirking, but the argument seemed poised to continue regardless.

Azula watched them bicker, however, and a rather strange sensation nestled in her chest upon hearing their words… upon processing them. Was that really what a brother was expected to do? In other cultures, maybe… it was ridiculous, though, and she scoffed at so much as the idea of picturing her brother getting a job for her sake, or going hunting or foraging for her. That wasn't likely to ever happen… not that she needed it to, of course. She did fend for herself, unlike Katara. She had been apart from her brother for three years, and she saw no need to rely on him. She didn't truly need anyone…

Hours after a rather simplistic dinner – Sokka caught a small animal that didn't taste very good to Azula – the group was set to rest again. The earthbender crafted an earthen tent for herself, the waterbender set up a traditional tent for herself, the Avatar was resting on his bison's saddle… and again, the warrior seemed determined to keep watch.

"You're on guard duty again tonight?" Azula asked, raising her eyebrows. Sokka nodded.

"It works, doesn't it? I got plenty of sleep through the day anyhow, I can take it," he shrugged. "You should get some rest too, Princess…"

"You'll still watch me as I sleep, won't you?" she teased, smirking. "Quite interesting to be the object of someone's observation to such extent…"

"Uh… yeah. Because you're a prisoner. And I don't want you pulling any funny business on us," Sokka said… and yet he was smiling. Ha. He found amusement in her teasing just as well.

"Oh, surely that's not all there is to it," she said, beaming mischievously. He chuckled and shook his head.

"There's not supposed to be more to it…" he said. "But anyway, you didn't sleep all day like I did, so you should rest now. You can even borrow my sleeping bag, if you want."

"Borrow your…?"

It hit her then that it wasn't a matter of older brother protectiveness: that was just what he was like. He protected people… even if they didn't deserve his protection.

"Only if you promise you won't set it on fire just to mess with me or anything mean like that, okay?" he said, smiling at her before reaching for his bags and unfolding the sleeping bag for her.

What a rare act of kindness… of generosity. What would he gain from this? What did he think he'd gain from it? Nothing, surely: he had to be stupid to think she had truly lowered her guard with no ulterior motive… and she could tell he wasn't stupid. At least, not when it came to things that mattered. So why show her any form of kindness…?

Once she was halfway inside the sleeping bag, she realized there was more to this apparently selfless act than met the eye: her stomach lurched at the scent of the sleeping bag, and she shot the owner an accusatory glare.

"W-why would you…?! Are you trying to kill me?!"

"What?" he said, raising his eyebrows. "Oh! Oh, yeah, Toph says it smells weird, huh…? Woops. Heh, I forgot. Okay, okay, I'll wash it as soon as I can! Sorry… but it beats sleeping on the hard ground, doesn't it?"

"That depends on how sick I am in the morning…" Azula huffed, covering her nose, hoping that breathing through her mouth would be enough for her to ignore the stench.

"Well, I do hope you don't die! I promise, that wasn't an attempt to kill you. You haven't given us any useful information yet, so what's the point in trying to kill you at all, huh?"

"Ah, that's why you keep me alive, and not so you can watch me sleep," Azula asked, raising her eyebrows. Sokka smirked and nodded.

"True. Not that I'm complaining about the other thing, but I've got my priorities sorted out," he declared. She bit her lower lip but smiled.

Was this really what it was like to flirt with a boy? She'd never truly made any progress with anyone on that front before. This one seemed rather responsive to her advances, though… well, it would be useful practice for the future, at least. She could count on him for that.

"Good night, then," she said, keeping her head safely out of the sleeping bag, in hopes to inhale fresh air rather than the stale scent of the sleeping bag.

"Good night, Azula," he responded. It was weird that her gut felt tingly upon hearing him say her name…

The next day, however, took Azula by surprise: the Avatar had actually chosen this location to train, it seemed. And when Sokka was finally taking his time to sleep, the earthbender took to teaching earthbending lessons to the Avatar, and all his attempts to rest were thwarted completely. Once Sokka finally gave up resting, he took off to hunt, and Azula tagged along: while it was rather useful to learn more about the mechanics of earthbending, to unravel how to fight against it more effectively, she couldn't be careless and disregard her main pursuit. And as tempers seemed to flare often in the Avatar's training session, she ended up tagging along for Sokka's hunting trip instead. It would be useful to learn how hunting was done, if nothing else…

… Or so she thought, until Sokka fell into a hole, after chasing after a moose-lion cub, and despite he begged her for help, there wasn't much she could do for him: she pulled at him, jerked his hands upwards, and he only seemed to sink further. Funny how ironic life was, considering she was the one stuck in the ground similarly just two days ago…

"I'm going to die stuck in here, aren't I?" he groaned, after Azula's final attempt to heave him out failed.

"It's a possibility," she acknowledged. "I could be more helpful, you know? If I weren't shackled…?"

"Not much luck with that, I'm afraid…" Sokka groaned. "I… don't have the key myself."

"Ah. Then I'm befriending the wrong Water Tribe sibling, aren't I?" Azula said. That, at least, got a smile out of the warrior.

"Damn. And here I thought I was your type," Sokka said, nonchalantly.

"I didn't say you weren't. Just that, if you don't have the power to get rid of these, you're not much use to me," she said. Sokka chuckled and shook his head.

The rest of the day was surreal: the small moose-lion cub Sokka had been trying to hunt decided to play with him, carelessly so, even bringing him an apple that Azula found a most ironic gift for the avid meat-eater. Sokka groaned, swore he'd go vegetarian, made countless baseless claims… and yet not once did he beg her to go ask the others for help. Odd, considering two of his friends were earthbenders, albeit one more trained than the other…

And then the actual, chaotic mess began to unfold: Aang, apparently sick and tired of Toph's harsh training methods, stumbled into Sokka and his awkward situation. He failed to airbend him out of the hole, and then proceeded to pity his poor efforts at earthbending with a rather unexpected string of unfortunate wording, such as claiming to be stuck between a rock and a hard place… Azula couldn't stop chuckling, earning herself Sokka's harsh glares in retaliation… and that was when the mother of Sokka's new friend, the saber-tooth moose-lion cub, had appeared on the scene.

"Aang, just earthbend me out of here!" was Sokka's most common request, but the Avatar appeared to want to do anything but earthbend… leaving both his restrained companions to somehow fend for themselves as the furious creature sought to attack them.

It was fair and good that the Avatar's airbending seemed to distract the moose lion on occasion… but at one point it became apparent that it would trample Sokka most deliberately unless it was distracted. And while Azula could barely bend, with her hands shackled as she was, she leapt between Sokka and the creature and shot a small plum of blue fire in its direction.

That, of course, only seemed to make the creature angrier: Aang had to intervene then, casting a powerful gust of wind that finally alarmed the creature enough about these humans and their potential abilities, and it left through the forest at last.

And then Toph took advantage of that momentum to force Aang to earthbend for good. The Avatar was astonished to finally unlock the secrets of the art… while Azula and Sokka were merely relieved they had survived a nearly lethal encounter with a beast that could've killed them both.

Katara was delighted to see Sokka safe and sound once they were all free to return to camp, though she scowled at Azula, ready to blame her for her brother's disappearance…

"Azula stuck by me the whole time I was in that stupid hole," Sokka sighed, smiling and clapping the Fire Nation Princess on the shoulder. "I kind of thought she'd make a run for it? But… she stayed! And then even tried to save me from the moose-lion, but she just made it angry instead…"

"Really?" Katara said, blinking blankly, utterly blown away by the explanations.

"Animals… don't like fire. Clearly," Azula said, sighing.

"But she still tried to help me! And that really took me by surprise," Sokka grinned. "You know, you might fit better with our team than I thought all along. Aang! How about getting a new firebending teacher? Jeong Jeong was a pain anyway, so we could just recruit Azula for it and…!"

"W-wha…?!" Azula gasped. "Did you forget I'm supposed to be your enemy?"

"I think you're the one who did, eh? You tried to save my life today!" Sokka grinned, spreading his arms as though to hug her, and Azula squirmed out of his reach, hoping fruitlessly for her cheeks not to be as red as she suspected they were, going by the heat that surged underneath her skin.

Had she forgotten she was their enemy? No, not really. But was she growing to enjoy their company…? His company, in particular?

Perhaps a little.

Many strange things seemed to happen to the Avatar and his friends… and being caught in the middle of so many happenings was a rather novel experience for Azula. While she wasn't quite the most sheltered noblewoman in the Fire Nation, the idea of traveling abroad with a group of teenagers and children close to her age, with no one to enforce real discipline, no rules beyond those they agreed upon, no stability beyond the ground underneath their feet – or the saddle on which they flew – wouldn't have crossed her mind at all until it became her reality.

After the wild encounter with the moose lions, they went on a strange vacation spree that she found utterly laughable – they took vacations carelessly, willfully ignoring that her father was surely gearing up to strike against the Earth Kingdom's bastions? Truly? – and that resulted in a highly questionable trip to the Si Wong Desert. It didn't help that a group comprised by one too many weirdos decided to recruit a grown-up who appeared to be even more airheaded than Ty Lee – some professor at Ba Sing Se's university –, and that Sokka had decided his vacation would take them to a Library. Oh, it was a real pain that his decision would be the first one that was slightly appealing to her, in all this mess… despite the obvious fact, of course, that visiting a Spirit Library sounded completely, utterly absurd to the Princess of the Fire Nation.

"Does this place even exist?" Toph asked, eventually, as they soared across the desert on the sky bison's saddle.

"Some say it doesn't," the professor replied. Azula scoffed.

"Unsurprisingly so. Why would a Spirit Library be located in a desert, of all places?" she asked. "Utterly inconvenient."

"Well, a desert probably has plenty of room to host a big Library, right?" Sokka said, casually.

It was absurd logic, as far as Azula could tell – might as well claim there was plenty of room at the bottom of the sea, too, and if the idea was to keep everyone away from the damn place, it was far safer underwater than in a desert –, but so much as looking at Sokka right now, while he was shamelessly shirtless, was a bad idea. Why he had decided to strip off his upper body's garments, Azula didn't know, but while she didn't believe she was a prude, she couldn't dare look at him if there was a chance he'd catch her. So far, she had merely glanced at him on occasion… and admired his lean body. Yes, that was harmless, it wasn't like she'd tried to make a move on him – not like she truly knew how, anyway. But if he so much as suspected what effects his shirtless figure was having on her mind, he would never let her live this embarrassment down. And curses, she didn't need further problems while traveling with this group…

"How about the fact that this is something… spiritual?" Azula said, with a sardonic grin.

"You know, that part's been bugging me too," Toph said, flopped upon the saddle as she was. "The heck does it even mean, a Spirit Library? Are spirits even real?"

"Of course they are!" Aang exclaimed, beaming.

Azula huffed, glancing – despite her better judgment – at Sokka as though to ask if he truly believed such nonsense… only to find a rather surprising, disheartened expression on his face. She frowned: what was that? Melancholy? Misery? Longing? Why would the mention of spirits make him react that way?

He was the one to spot something eventually: a tower in the middle of the desert, apparently. And yet, before long, the group realized the Library was actually underground, somehow. Curious, despite herself, Azula requested that they allowed her inside the Library too: while Katara hesitated at first, Azula agreed to the conditions of being shackled again once they were done climbing inside the building, and to everyone's surprise, she did nothing to hinder their mission – fools that they were, truly, for expecting otherwise. What was she going to achieve by attacking them in the middle of a desert, of all things? So Toph and Appa lingered behind, and the rest of the group entered the tower by climbing through with a rope.

Her initial disbelief was rewarded with the most incredible location she had ever set foot upon, and she had been raised in a Palace, of all things. But nothing was quite so astonishing as the giant owl: Sokka had to clap a hand over her mouth as they hid behind a pillar, hoping not to alert the terrifying otherworldly being of their presence. Alright, fine, spirits were real, and she sure wanted nothing to do with them. Yet the fool professor had ran out and revealed himself… and soon enough Azula caught herself watching as each of them offered knowledge of some sort to the creature. The Avatar's wanted poster had been accepted, though… that rang a bell.

"I'm sorry it's so crumpled," she smiled awkwardly, as she offered the giant owl another wanted poster, this time bearing the faces of her brother and uncle.

"Both of Fire Nation make?" the owl spoke. "Quite an astonishing find. I appreciate these additions to my collection."

Oh, she was saved. She had folded one of those posters carelessly into a pocket a long time ago, and that it was still there was a damn miracle… for, otherwise, she might be doing something even more ridiculous than Sokka's splendid knot. In Azula's opinion, it wasn't all that bad… but the owl was far from impressed.

"You're not very bright, are you?"

Wow. Those were harsh words to speak to someone who was, in her opinion, the second smartest person in this very group. The comment, of course, didn't sit well with the warrior, who scowled as the owl welcomed them into the Library and left them to their own devices.

"Bright enough to fool you," he said, bitterly, before setting out to rummage through the Library's contents.

The owl's comment had unsettled Azula too… though she wasn't entirely sure why it bothered her so much. She felt an impulse to reassure him, even if she wasn't sure it would be welcome: she did think he was smart. If anything, that owl appeared rather foolish to her for not being able to see it. And yet every time she wanted to speak out, she failed to find the strength to utter the words: why? Was it because they were too honest, this time around? What was wrong with her? Was she…?

… She wasn't. There was no way she was developing actual, serious feelings for this boy, was she?

Yet she kept following him through the Library, watching as he stuffed his bag with scrolls, and she watched with curiosity until he shot her a sharp glare.

"What? You think I shouldn't do this?" he asked.

"I wasn't judging you in the least, no," Azula said, blinking blankly. "Did you think I was?"

"… Maybe?" Sokka pouted, skulking towards another area of the Library.

"If anything, I'd think it's fair. After that owl's comment about you, I'd gladly ransack this place, too."

Sokka slowed on his footsteps and glanced at her with uncertainty from over his shoulder. Azula blinked blankly: had she said anything wrong? She had hoped to have conveyed her feelings nonchalantly enough that he might not suspect she had any deep motivations to speak them…

"You… you're really something, huh?" Sokka said, lowering his gaze. "You do remember, right? That… we're supposed to be enemies?"

"You think I'd forget?" she asked, though her heart sank at that question. That had to mean she was developing a stupid, one-sided attachment, right?

"W-well, it's just… when you say stuff like that, I end up thinking, well… stupid things, I guess," Sokka sighed. "Things I shouldn't. Especially not after… everything."

"Everything?" Azula asked, blinking blankly as she stared at his back. "Well… granted we didn't start off with the right foot, but… I thought we were getting along better lately. That you were happy I'd stood between you and an angry moose-lion? I wouldn't be surprised if you decided my being Fire Nation makes all that worthless, but…"

"It doesn't make it worthless, it makes it… complicated," Sokka said, gritting his teeth. "But that's not it. Not really."

"Then…?" Azula asked, raising her eyebrows.

"I… look, I don't want to talk about this, usually," he said, breathing deeply. "And I don't know if you'd understand, anyway. But I… lost someone. Someone I liked, a lot. It happened in the Siege of the North, and… it still hurts. And sometimes when I look at you, I remember how that felt, and it's great for a second until I suddenly just think…"

"That you shouldn't be feeling this way about anyone else?" Azula ventured, warily. Yet, to her surprise, Sokka shook his head.

"That I shouldn't be feeling this way about someone I'll probably lose too, anyway," he said. "You know why we're here. You know what we're doing. You know I'll fight the Fire Nation, no matter which side you choose to stand on. And… no matter how friendly we've been, you'll choose your own people, won't you? Just… as I'd choose my own, if our situation were reversed somehow. There's… there's no happy ending for this, is there?"

Azula gritted her teeth, frowning… no, no, there wasn't. But… did this mean he liked her too, to a fault? He'd be the first boy to ever… no, the very first person she'd know for a fact had ever liked her, in whatever sense of the word. Was it wrong to fixate upon that now, when he was stating something as important as this? They were enemies, no matter what came next…

For she couldn't turn against her father, could she? She couldn't just become a traitor… she couldn't turn against her people.

Not even for the first boy she had ever grown to like this way.

"I'm not saying we can't be… well… okay, I don't know what we can't be, to be honest," Sokka sighed, turning towards her once she stayed silent for too long. "Or what we can be, either. But you'll want to stop us from attacking your nation, and we just want to set the world free of the Fire Nation's control. We want balance back. And unless you're having second thoughts about your life's mission… I don't know how things will work, from this point onwards."

Azula sighed but shrugged. Sokka gulped as she raised her shackled hands in a gesture of surrender.

"You're not wrong. Not in the least. If you want the truth? I… was trying to get to you. I thought maybe befriending a member of your group would be the best way to break out of this imprisonment, somehow. So… you don't have to worry about a thing. I was completely dishonest the whole time."

"Huh… the whole time?" Sokka asked, though his voice carried a tinge of disappointment that took Azula aback. It wasn't a surprised disappointment… but rather, an expected one.

"You… knew, didn't you? That this was why I…?" Azula said. He shrugged.

"I guessed. I hoped otherwise, but… what's the point?" he smiled sadly, shrugging again. "That… makes it easier, doesn't it? Because the whole time, I knew that was probably what you were after, so…"

"So, we were on the same page" Azula determined. Sokka nodded, too.

"Good thing we cleared the air," he said. She nodded.

"Then, I… will leave you to your research, whatever it may be," she said, simply. "I… will go do something else, in the meantime."

She walked away quickly, wondering if he'd call for her or stop her, anything dramatic and apparently romantic as that… and of course, it didn't happen. Ugh, she was an idiot. She was an idiot. Her heart was beating so sadly… why would a heart beat sadly? That made no sense! And yet each miserable beat seemed to propel nothing but misery through her system. Idiot… she really had grown fond of him. Too fond. What was wrong with her? What kind of fool grew to like the person who had taken them captive?

But she knew why… she did. He was the first person to laugh loudly at her jokes, and his smiles were the warmest that had ever been directed towards her. He was sharp, just as she was… he was strategic, cold-blooded, analytical. All of that sat well with her. Too well, if anything. But perhaps that was wrong, wasn't it? It had to be. Surely their similarities, the ones she had been surprised to discover existed between them, weren't all that strong in the end… or, if they were, weren't conducive to a good relationship. Yes, that was it. That was certainly the likeliest of truths. But… it wouldn't hurt to confirm it.

The disaster began when she was halfway through scouring across the romance section, seeking any books or scrolls on compatibility: the building trembled suddenly, and sand leaked through the walls. The whole group seemed ready to scram, and she caught up with them… just in time for Sokka and Aang to race back inside, and for Katara and the damn professor to stay behind.

"What is going on?!" Azula asked. Katara gasped, eyeing her warily.

"And to think… I took for granted you'd be the one to cause more trouble around here!" she admitted, with an apologetic grimace. "Run! We have to keep him distracted!"

"The giant OWL?!" Azula asked, astonished. Katara huffed.

"Who else?!" she asked.

Azula huffed, wondering what to do. There had to be a strong enough distraction, something that the creature would be too incensed by to remember it was chasing any of them…

Oh. Well, that was a risky gambit, but it was worth trying anyway.

"Katara! Remove these shackles, now!"

"Are you sure about what you were saying before you found that paper, Sokka?" Aang asked, as they moved the dials of the calendar in the planetarium room. "I know what you mean that it's probably better to let her go, but… are you really sure? You seem to really get along with Azula!"

"And that's going to be a problem in the future, don't you think?!" Sokka squeaked, eyeing the dials anxiously – not close enough, another attempt, maybe the next date would do…

"Well… I don't know how it's not going to be one, if anything," Aang said. Sokka scowled.

"What'd you mean by…? Oh, we're close!" he exclaimed. "Next one!"

"I mean… you're already so worried about her that you're pulling away in fear of getting hurt, or hurting her!" Aang said. "You really think seeing her off will change that? You're still going to care, if we bump into her in a battlefield! That's not going to change now!"

Sokka gritted his teeth and eyed Aang with uncertainty as he pulled the lever one last time. Why was that little guy so wise when he shouldn't be? Yes, at this point, he'd definitely hesitate if he found Azula in a battlefield. He'd never have the guts to go through with fighting her at his best… and then she'd kill him, surely, because she was raised to uphold her nation above all else. There was no reason for her to hold back… especially when her apparent interest in him had been feigned just to obtain a fleeting friendship that would buy her way out of the group.

Which… he had been about to give her.

Was he really about to give the girl the chance to fulfill her plan perfectly?

"It's this one, Sokka! Look, it matches!"

He hadn't even noticed the planetarium's lights were dimmer this time. He made sure to jot down the right date for the eclipse and then he dragged Aang out of the room at haste… only to find something was very, very wrong in the Library now.

"YOU MONSTERS! CRIMINALS! YOU DEFILE MY VAST COLLECTION FOR THE LAST TIME!"

"What…?" Aang gasped: the owl's voice seemed to come from the lowest depths of the Library. Was he truly down there, rather than chasing Katara up here?

They reached the landing where they'd left the rope… to find only Katara and Zei nearby. Sokka's heart nearly stopped.

"Where's Azula?!"

"She's…!" Katara grimaced, glancing downwards…

An inferno of orange flames burned brightly down below. Aang and Sokka gasped: they had found out about the burning of the Library's collection of the Fire Nation… and they knew exactly how angry Wan Shi Tong would be upon losing more of his collection now.

"What…?! What's she doing, hell…?!" Sokka exclaimed, clasping the railings of the Library's topmost floor glancing down at the inferno below before shouting: "AZULA!"

He wouldn't have believed it if he hadn't seen it: a sudden speck of blue in the sea of orange took him by surprise, more so when it continued to increase in size, constantly: was she jetting herself out of the Library's basement?

"She's coming back! Oh, she's actually…!" Katara gasped.

"We need to get out of here!" Aang said, unfolding his glider. "Grab onto the rope, Katara, Sokka, Professor Zei! I'll fly us all out as fast as I can!"

"Oh, but…" the professor hesitated… when there was no time to hesitate at all: Sokka and Katara clasped the rope they'd used earlier, glancing at the man in chagrin. "I won't find another collection like this. I'd much rather stay…"

"Are you kidding me…?!" Sokka exclaimed, but Katara gritted her teeth and urged him to grab onto the rope tight… for Aang was pulling at it already. "Professor Zei! You're going to die if you stay there!"

"Sokka, there's no point…" Katara said, gritting her teeth as they flew off… as the rope dangled before Zei, and he refused to take it.

And it turned out to be a good thing, for by the time Aang, Katara and Sokka had only just reached the exit, Azula was about to catch up to them: half the rope caught fire, and she nearly tore the whole window to shambles when her explosive firebending brought her out of the Library in a hurry.

She tried to ease her fall into the sand, but it wasn't easy. She could hear Sokka calling for her – was he for real? Was he really worried about her…? Oh dear, why was her heart beating that much faster upon that thought…? – but the adrenaline and the excitement over what she'd done was still bursting through her as she landed rather wildly on the sand. It hurt, she was definitely going to bear a few nasty bruises… but she'd be okay. She'd distracted the damn owl, and now…

"Azula!"

Two hands caught her shoulders, and suddenly she was being hugged. Hugged. When the blazes had someone hugged her this tightly, this intimately before?

Surely Katara could tell this was a rather awkward situation for her, as she returned Azula's near-frightened gaze with her own… though Aang wasn't quite so interested in whatever was happening with them. No, he had much bigger concerns in mind, for now that the Library was gone, there was no one but them and Toph in the wide expanse of the desert:

"Where's Appa?"

If she'd decided to bet on it, she would've sooner thought the first member of this strange team to lose its mind and decide to lash out at everyone aggressively would be the damn lemur.

That Aang would be distraught by the loss of his bison wasn't quite that impossible to understand. That he would unleash that frustration upon his friends, though, took Azula by surprise: even goody-two-shoes like him had dark sides, then? And yet he hadn't even asked about whether or not she was okay after her rough landing, disregarding how Sokka had demanded she was kept unshackled before helping her walk through the desert, an arm around her waist, and also disregarding Azula's rejection of Katara's offer for waterbending healing, for the Princess suspected that, without the damn massive hairy creature, they'd be stuck in a desert for eons, and wasting what little water they had on healing a few bruises seemed a bad idea.

And where she had expected Sokka to push her away, now he seemed to be doing the exact opposite. Why? It made no sense. Not that she needed it to, she rather liked being held by him… somewhat. She guessed. It was comfortable. That was all there was to it. Yet their last conversation hadn't been that friendly, and now he seemed to be protecting her with all his might…?

"Are you… alright?" she asked him. Sokka blinked blankly and gazed at her with unexpected shyness. "You're being, well…"

"I'm trying to help. I mean… it's my fault you set the Library on fire," Sokka grimaced. "And then you got hurt. I… I'm sorry."

"Ah? Then going back inside instead of running away when the damn building started to sink was your idea?" Azula said, huffing sarcastically. "Had I known it was you and not Aang I wouldn't have burned anything at all…"

He laughed and shook his head, and she smiled. It was weird… but it felt like they were back on track, suddenly. Maybe they wouldn't become anything else… but this was fine. This worked, for now.

Of course, what was happening with the rest of the team was a whole different story: Toph was riddled with guilt over not being able to stop the sandbenders from stealing Appa, Katara was confused over whatever was brewing between her brother and Azula, but more than that, she was aghast by Aang's terrible mood, too. He had taken to gliding frantically, searching for the bison to no avail. The sandbenders were gone… as was his best friend.

"Katara, can I have some more water?" Toph asked, suddenly. Katara warned her against consuming too much of it, and Azula agreed, silently, despite she accepted the small amount of water Katara offered each of them through her bending.

"Can't be that healthy to drink someone's bending water, huh…?" Sokka reasoned, before making a face of disgust. "Ugh! You used this on the swamp guy!"

"No wonder it tastes swampy," Toph said.

"Well, there's not much I can do about that. We can't find much water around here, can we?" Katara said, gazing around at the endless expanse of desert before them…

"Maybe we can!" Sokka exclaimed suddenly, beaming. "Look!"

He grinned before releasing Azula from his hold just to rush towards a cactus he'd spotted not too far from where they stood. Well, there was water inside plants, why deny that? And yet…

"You shouldn't eat strange plants, Sokka!" Katara told him: Sokka had already taken to slicing the cactus with his weapons, though, offering her a glimpse of the watery interior.

"I know it's not every day this happens… but I agree with Katara for once," Azula said, watching Sokka with uncertainty: Momo had taken to drinking with him, of course… that damn creature was a menace, Azula was certain of it.

"It's very thirst quenching, Azula!" Sokka grinned, motioning at her to approach him. "Come on, it'll do wonders for you, especially after all you bent in the…"

He stopped talking suddenly, only for his body to start reacting rather weirdly to the juice he'd just ingested: his pupils dilated, he shook his head violently, he smiled awkwardly, some of the juice trickled down to his chin…

"Drink cactus juice! It'll quench ya'! It's the quenchiest!"

Both Azula and Katara stared at him in chagrin… while Toph merely raised her eyebrows, entirely confused by what her feet were sensing: was Sokka waggling like a worm on the sand, for some reason…?

"Okay, that's definitely too much for you," said Katara, grimacing. "We have to keep moving on."

"Hey, who lit Toph on fire?" Sokka asked suddenly, before turning towards Azula. "It was YOU?!"

"U-uh, no? I didn't light anything on fire…! In the last, uh, two hours?" Azula said, blinking blankly…

And yet Sokka didn't seem to be all that appalled by the notion of her setting anything on fire. Instead, he was smiling brightly at her, and that only felt more ominous than anything else.

"You know what?!" he exclaimed. "Your fire's WATER TRIBE! Can you believe that, huh, huh?! You're Water Tribe, deep down! I knew that was why I got you so well, eh, eh, Azula?! You're like… wham! And I'm just… whosh! I melt in your hands, girl!"

"You… what? I have absolutely no idea what you're trying to say… and I'm not sure I want to," Azula swallowed hard, as Sokka waved his arms around recklessly.

"Oh, you know what I'm saying! You should marry me!"

The words stunned the three girls, outright. Sokka only smiled carelessly… while the lemur twitched awkwardly behind him. Azula's face was rather red now… and not precisely because of the sunburns a whole day in the desert would result in.

"Y-y-you… that's not a proposal, is it? Or is…?" Azula said, blinking blankly.

"You know what? I want some of that cactus thing," Toph decided, beaming. Katara flinched.

"Not a chance, Toph. I think one love-crazed, cactus-addled weirdo is enough for today…"

"Hey! I'm not in love with any of you, I won't start proposing willy-nilly…"

Azula stared at Sokka again, utterly blown away by their words: in love…? Was Sokka…? No. That wasn't right. That made no sense. That was just a weird joke between friends, wasn't it…? Just as the jokes she'd usually pull on Zuko and Mai back when they were kids…? For they couldn't be serious. Sokka couldn't be serious. The cactus juice was messing with his head… or was it making him more honest than he was before?

Suddenly, a gust of wind, and a rush of sand dust, startled the whole group: they turned towards its source to find it appeared something had exploded deeper in the desert, perhaps, by the pattern of the shifting sand…

"What's that?" Katara asked.

"N-no idea," Azula mumbled, quickly. It was a good idea to change the subject, yes. Weird sand clouds were much more intriguing and important than whether Sokka loved her or not…

"It's a giant mushroom! Maybe it's friendly!"

… Upon hearing those words, Azula's mild suspicions that maybe he was serious about his proposal went up in smoke, vanishing without trace, much as the giant mushroom had.

"Shouldn't have given you that much credit," Azula sighed, looking at Sokka. "Hey. We should get moving. No point in admiring the mushroom anymore."

"Oh! Okay! Let's do something else now!" Sokka decided, beaming.

She didn't foolishly believe she could anticipate to any of Sokka's weird decisions or words while he was in this strange, intoxicated state…

… And yet she never would have expected his new idea would be to kiss her.

Her face flushed red violently, more so when she heard Katara gasping behind her.

"Is he waving at the giant mushroom again…?" Toph asked, but Katara didn't appear to want to respond… not even when Sokka pulled away at last, beaming.

"You taste better than cactus juice!" he declared.

"Y-you…! T-that was my first…!" she exclaimed, blushing madly as she covered her mouth with her hands. "You're…! At the very least you should've had the decency to do that while you were on your right mind!"

"Oh, you didn't like it?" Sokka asked, blinking blankly as he tilted his head sideways. "Must be you need to drink cactus juice too! It's the quenchi-…!"

Azula smacked the small plant bowl he'd held in his hand so far, doing away with the remaining cactus juice, and Sokka gasped, digging at the sand desperately as though searching for the now lost liquid that had leaked through the ground.

"Nooooo! We're dooooomed!" he exclaimed. Despite the situation had been rather strange, Katara laughed softly now, and Azula only rolled her eyes and scowled at the foolish boy she certainly liked far better than she ever should have.

Yet as difficult as it was to navigate the desert for hours with an awkwardly rambling companion such as Sokka, it seemed to Azula his nonsense made the matter livelier, kisses or no… especially when Aang returned. He had been rather unpleasant about collecting water from a cloud that crossed the sky, right under the moon… namely because he had hopelessly thought it was his bison. Yet Azula's attention was caught by something else: Sokka's comment.

"Why would Princess Yue need Appa? She's the moon! She flies by herself!"

She had read reports of what had happened up north. Her father had briefed her of it directly, too. At one point, the moon had been blocked, its influence faded, all because of Admiral Zhao's decisions, apparently… she had thought it was a nonsensical claim, for waterbenders losing their power completely? It sounded like a rather helpful phenomenon, but a confusing one too. How had it come to pass at all…? Especially when it hadn't lasted very long, too: the waterbenders were back on track not long after, and the battle was lost.

According to her father, Admiral Zhao meant to destroy the Moon Spirit that day. Whatever that meant. She had given the matter little credit at the time, but was the Moon Spirit this Princess Yue…?

She resolved to ask Katara once they had a chance to take a light break, upon bumping into a sand glider that Aang helped steer most unwillingly. The waterbender was busy watching the compass, ensuring their course was true, and Azula offered to support her with that, for it was better to talk to someone rational than to talk to Sokka right now…

"What, exactly, happened with this Princess Yue?" she asked. Katara froze, glancing at her warily.

"You're wondering… why, exactly?" she asked.

"He brought up that he lost someone before. He didn't elaborate," Azula explained. "I didn't know what he meant, but… it surprised me a little to hear him talk about the Northern Water Tribe's Princess."

"Well… Sokka had a thing for her," Katara said. Azula damn near cursed herself for feeling disappointed upon hearing those words, even if she already knew them to be true. "But she was supposed to marry someone else? And yeah, I do think she liked him too, but… then she became the moon and there was no way they'd be together anymore."

"She became… the moon?" Azula said, with an awkward grin.

"She explained that she was stillborn," Katara said. "And then the Moon Spirit touched her when she was a baby: it brought her to life or so. When Zhao killed the Moon Spirit, she gave her own life to remediate things… she took the Moon Spirit's place and sacrificed herself to save everyone."

"And… she left Sokka? Just like that?" Azula asked, puzzled. Katara shrugged.

"She had a duty. He understood," Katara said, simply.

A duty. A duty to her people… to fulfill what was expected from her. And in the process, she had surely broken the heart of the boy she liked, even if she had never meant to.

No wonder Sokka had claimed to be ready to let her go even before anything serious started between them, too.

He was still his most carelessly goofy self as they traveled across the desert, but Azula found herself looking at him with different eyes now. How odd that a young man with such heavy burdens could be so reckless and silly when he wanted to… her lips still tingled where he'd kissed them. Ugh, it wasn't something she should be thinking about fondly, of course not… but that he might truly like her was still a most dazzling concept, one she wasn't sure how to cope with yet, let alone now that she understood the true source of his apprehensions.

She ended up finding a way to cope with it by watching over him once they stopped at a massive rock their compass led them to: Sokka claimed he felt better, but upon attempting to taste a gross substance on the wall, Azula decided he simply wasn't recovered yet. She slapped his hand violently and he gasped as she pulled him towards her.

"No eating weird sticky nonsense that's stuck to a cavern's walls!" she growled. He blinked blankly, staring into her eyes with innocent confusion.

"Why not…?" he said.

"Because if that tastes like crap and you kiss me again, I'll set you on fire," Azula declared.

"And I don't think anyone will stop her this time, Sokka," Katara smirked. Toph snickered too as Sokka winced… and yet he found Azula had taken his hand in hers, pulling him through the cavern with her.

"You're just… going to hold my hand now?"

"I can't trust you to behave yourself if I don't," Azula said, curtly, hoping not to betray just how nervous she was about acting this way…

Yet she could see, from the corner of her eyes, when Sokka bit his lip and smiled. Was he happy to hold her hand…? Or was he simply happy that someone was looking after him so closely, protecting him, when he was always the protector…?

She couldn't help but continue defending him once the buzzard wasps attacked: she shielded him with her body, even using her fire to chase away the beasts. Busy as she was ensuring the groggy Sokka wasn't hurt, she couldn't do anything to protect the damn lemur – she KNEW he'd be trouble eventually, damn little thing – when one of the buzzard wasps took him away. Katara was busy serving as Toph's eyes, just as Azula had taken to shielding Sokka herself, so it was Aang who saved him… rather violently too. But when the Avatar and the lemur returned to the team, and the buzzard wasps appeared to gear up to continue their attacks, towers of sand chased away the creatures… and that was when the sandbenders had appeared.

Tired as she was, puzzled by too many things at once, Azula barely paid attention to the exchange, checking on Sokka to ensure he was okay… and then the most terrifying of all moments began when the Avatar lost his temper completely.

This time, however, Sokka took to protecting her: he had seen this before, Azula realized. He collected Toph too, one arm around each of them, and helped them get away from the whirlwind of wild sand, stirred by the savagely furious Avatar. It was a display of power unlike anything Azula had seen, and she could barely take her eyes away from him: he had been so small, so innocent in her eyes, merely twenty-four hours ago… and suddenly he was the most punishing force of nature she had ever witnessed. Suddenly he wasn't just a symbol of everything her father had raised her to defeat, a potentially dangerous bender… no, he was already as dangerous as he pleased. And, as powerful as Fire Lord Ozai was… could he ever go against someone with such unnatural, otherworldly bending and win? Even if he was but a twelve-year-old boy?

Somehow, Katara managed to calm him down, if it could be called that. All the while, Sokka held Azula closely, her face pressed against his chest, his heartbeats reassuring her, despite she was anything but soothed… despite she suddenly found her world had taken yet another tumble on that chaotic, catastrophic day, and she wasn't sure how she'd compose it, or herself, ever again.

Finding water again was so refreshing, and drinking it cleared his mind completely, it seemed to Sokka. Katara was far more cheerful now, though that she decided to jump into the water by doing what she had called a "waterbending bomb" was probably not the best use of her improved mood – she soaked the maps Sokka had stolen from the Library, and she had to dry them under her brother's fierce glare.

All the while, though, one member of their group was unexpectedly aloof… and perhaps self-conscious. She had washed, rinsing off the dirt and dust from days on the road, but she hadn't joined the others at playing in the water. Sokka had expected her to join him in deciding which route to take to Ba Sing Se, where they hoped to find Appa… but so far, nothing. She had never been this distant, and she sat at a distance as a group of refugees, passing through the area, offered them useful information regarding a secret way into Ba Sing Se that the Fire Nation was fully unaware of. Even once they started on their way to Full Moon Bay, she was quiet and distant still, walking at some distance from the rest of the group.

"Say, uh… you two talked a bunch, while I was cactus-juice addled?" Sokka asked his sister casually, once he pulled her away from chatting with the refugees they'd just met. "I think, at least? I don't really remember most of what happened anymore, but…"

"Ah, you're not sure why she's being all that distant and weird now? Probably because you kissed her without permission," Katara declared, beaming. Sokka's jaw dropped. "Not that I know for sure if she's mad about that, but you know… surely doesn't help much, does it?"

"I…! Oh, no. She'll hate me now, won't she?" he groaned. "But… wait, when did I do that, again?"

"At the start? You'd just drank the damn thing and then you said you melted in her hands? You were being really weird about her," Katara said, smirking. Sokka raised an eyebrow in Katara's direction.

"And that… somehow doesn't bother you that much?" he asked. "I thought you didn't like her."

"Well, it's hard not to like the only other person who wasn't completely helpless while we traveled through the desert," Katara sighed. "Besides… I mean, yeah, she wasn't nice at first, and she did chase us, but she's definitely never done anything as bad as Zuko did. She's been with us for a while, she's not chained down anymore, and she's still done nothing to hurt any of us. I don't know, Sokka… maybe she's not that bad."

"I agree," he said, smiling at her. "I… I really think she isn't, either. Though, well, I guess we could be wrong. But the way she helped distract that owl, and she's tried to help keep me safe so many times… it's weird, you know? She jumps in front of me all the time…"

"She probably likes you too, see?" said Katara, smirking. "Which… I guess, from a rational point of view, it might not be a great thing? I mean, I know why you'd be apprehensive, Sokka, and if you think this isn't worth trying it's okay, but… I'd expected worse from the Fire Lord's daughter."

"Yeah… me too," Sokka smiled, glancing at the Princess, who walked far ahead of him and Katara.

"Just… talk to her? I guess?" said Katara, shrugging. "Maybe you still have a shot, somehow."

"Even if I kissed her when I shouldn't have, huh…?" he mused.

There were several reasons why he wasn't all that sure about this… and yet whenever he thought back to the past weeks of being allied with Azula, he couldn't help but feel warmth nestling in his chest. She was something else, wasn't she? And he… he was very much attached to her now, whether it was wise or not. Whether he had tried to push her away or not. And if he ever kissed her again… well, he'd make sure it was the right way, this time around.

He decided to talk to her once they reached the ferry station: Azula had been unusually quiet so far, and he guessed it was time he apologized for the cactus juice mess, anyway.

"Uh… hey, Azula?" he called her, unusually shyly, as they lagged behind at the end of their group: the station was very crowded, but they managed to find the line to request for passports anyway. "I, uh, wanted to say I was sorry for troubling you back in the desert. I didn't mean to, but… I guess I did a lot of things I shouldn't have."

"Oh?" Azula raised her eyebrows, intrigued by his words. "Such as…?"

"W-well… I shouldn't have had cactus juice, for starters," he smiled awkwardly. "And I shouldn't have, well, kissed you without asking…?"

"Without… asking?" Azula repeated. Sokka's face flushed. "So… you think it's fine if you ask?"

"W-well! Only if you say I can, even if I ask. T-that is. Well. I think so?" he said, swallowing hard.

Azula blinked blankly at the taller boy. He was so nervous… so endearing, too. She certainly didn't expect to grow genuinely fond of him, and she had resisted the notion for a while… but she was inevitably interested in him now. And his babbling wasn't helping matters at all.

"Hmm… well. I guess… I'll have to think on that permission, then. Just as that woman seems to be thinking about ours," Azula said, grimacing. "If only this were the Fire Nation, we'd be on a ferry by now just because I'm here…"

"Heh, yeah. No doubt," Sokka smiled awkwardly. "Though… we should try to not let anyone know you're Fire Nation, you know? A lot of people here probably were fleeing the consequences of the war, and if they knew…"

"Ah, true enough. Can you lend me your clothes?"

Sokka froze in place, staring at Azula in disbelief as she smirked teasingly at him. Yet she didn't take her words back.

"I mean… you lent me your sleeping bag before. I suppose your clothes will be smelly too… but no one would assume I'm Fire Nation Royalty if I'm smelly, right?" she said. Sokka's face was redder and redder by the minute.

She couldn't help but laugh as he failed to find words to respond with. Flustered as he was, he stared at her with disbelieving amazement, ignoring that Toph was securing passports for them to cross Full Moon Bay… and also ignoring that someone had walked up to him suddenly.

Azula frowned when the female guard suddenly forced Sokka to turn towards her: she was immediately tempted to jump between them, again finding protective instincts triggered when Sokka was concerned… did that guard think he was a criminal? Did they realize that whatever story Toph had fed the woman at the passport counter was bullshit…?

"Tickets and passports," said the girl. Sokka blinked blankly, inching away from her.

"Uh… I don't have mine right now. Go ask our, uh, team leader? Toph, over there," he said, before turning to Azula again. "Y-you don't really… I mean, if you'd told me you wanted to wear my clothes I would've washed them more thoroughly! We were at that waterfall, it would've been a good idea…"

"I was… messing with you," Azula said, smiling awkwardly: the girl behind Sokka appeared utterly perplexed by how he'd disregarded her words… and by the contents of the ones he was saying to his companion, too. "Is something wrong?"

"U-uh, no, I mean… no," said the girl, smiling dryly. Sokka glanced at her once more and she bit her lip. "You really… don't remember me?"

"… Am I supposed to?" he said, with an awkward smile. "Sorry?"

Azula covered her mouth with a hand, attempting not to laugh too boldly as the guard grimaced and sighed, walking away, defeated by Sokka's apparent forgetfulness. He turned towards Azula again, utterly perplexed.

"I… don't know what that was about," he said. "B-but anyway…!"

"I only hope she's not someone you kissed once too and then proceeded to forget about for no reason," Azula smiled. Sokka scoffed.

"Hell, no! I'm sure I don't know her!" he declared, pouting. "I've never seen that face before!"

And it wasn't a lie, not truly: never seeing Suki without Kyoshi Warrior makeup certainly hadn't prepared him for recognizing her without it – or without stronger clues aside from that confusing teasing.

The mood between Sokka and Azula appeared to make more sense now, although the underlying tension remained: Azula wasn't happy, however, when Aang determined they would give up their comfortable trips on the ferry for the sake of traveling across the dangerous Serpent's Pass with the same refugees from before. Sokka appeared just as miserable about the loss of their tickets and passports… and just as paranoid about the Serpent's Pass once they started to traverse it: at one point rocks nearly crushed them, and he shielded Azula with his body while Toph spared them from the falling rocks.

"Thanks, Toph…" Azula said, trying not to be flustered as Sokka pulled away slightly.

"U-uh… didn't mean to… yeah. Well. You're okay, though… right?" he said, biting his lip. Azula nodded weakly.

"You two need to climb a tree," Toph sighed shaking her head. The two of them shot her a confused glance. "You know? That song, people climb trees and make out there or whatever…?"

"Toph!"

She whistled carelessly as she walked past them, leaving Sokka and Azula flustered before each other. It wasn't enough, of course, that things were slightly awkward between them… their friends, naturally, had to make it worse.

But not a lot could make matters worse for Azula, as things stood. Once they made camp at last, in the middle of the night, she sat gazing into the line of the horizon, where the dark sky and the Mo Ce Sea seemed to merge together. The moon, Yue, as she'd finally come to know, hovered there… perhaps watching. Perhaps wondering if she could be half as good for that boy as she might have been. Perhaps knowing that Azula was plagued by the exact same conflict that had stolen her away from him…

And just thinking about him seemed to summon him: Sokka bit his lip as he took his seat beside her. He cleared his throat awkwardly before finally blurting out the actual words he'd wanted to say all day.

"What's bothering you?"

Azula raised her eyebrows and glanced at him. Awkward as he was, his eyes were full of concern.

"I… just can tell you're not okay. You're really quiet, and… well, I guess maybe it's because of how things turned out at the Library? Maybe it's because you don't want to enter an Earth Kingdom city…"

"There's a lot of reasons why I'm not okay," Azula said, simply, rubbing the bridge of her nose with her fingertips. "But… I guess the moon up there is the bigger one."

"The… moon?" Sokka said, gulping. "Huh… you talked to Katara about Yue, didn't you?"

"I'm not going to be an unreasonable asshole… I won't say that because I fancy you, you should've never had any history with anyone else before you met me," Azula said, with a sad grin. "If that's what you thought, anyway. But… I think once she told me about this, I understood. She's the reason why you tried to push me away in the Library, isn't she?"

"N-not for the reasons you might think," Sokka said, gritting his teeth. "It's not that I… that I don't like you as much as I did her, or anything like that. I just…"

"You don't want to lose anyone else the same way you did her. And you'd lose me, for sure."

Sokka gritted his teeth, his fists tightening. Azula breathed out slowly, gazing at the sky.

"I've gotten too caught up in this weird adventure," she said. "It's… nothing like I'd anticipated my first big mission would turn out. I thought I'd be successful, that I'd catch my brother and uncle, defeat the Avatar, overtake the whole Earth Kingdom singlehandedly… and so far, none of that has happened. Instead… I became a prisoner. And I… ended up befriending my captors, to the point where… where I don't even try to run away despite I'm no longer in chains."

"It wasn't that bad, though, was it?" Sokka asked.

"No. But it will be bad, in the future," she said, gazing at him earnestly. "I don't know what I mean to you… but I do know that I'm not much better than your Princess Yue. My loyalty is for my nation. I… I intend to fight by my father's side. Even if we're friends… even if we're more than that, as soon as I can find anyone trustworthy, I'd double-cross you. And then we'd be back to being enemies. And…"

"And?" Sokka said, his voice sad… though he was immediately alarmed by the chagrin on Azula's face.

"And… your Avatar? He… he's going to kill my father, isn't he?"

The question took Sokka by surprise. His eyes widened… for he had never thought of the Fire Lord as someone's father. As someone anyone genuinely cared about. And yet Azula's anguished face spoke lengths about how much he meant to her.

"It doesn't matter how hard we fight, how we push to win the war… I saw what he did when he lost his temper with those sandbenders," Azula said, gritting her teeth. "Not even with Sozin's Comet's return will we be able to stop him if he's trained enough by then. There's… there's no point, There's no happy ending, you said it yourself. And with him… I'll go down, too."

"N-no! No, Aang would never…!" Sokka started, but he froze: yes, Aang would have to kill Fire Lord Ozai, he had always assumed as much. Defeating him would likely require more than just demanding for his surrender. There was no chance in hell Ozai would step down for less than death… and yet: "He'd never hurt you. He'd never be able to hurt someone who was his friend."

"Not even if that friend is fighting alongside a man who'd do a lot worse to him than steal his sky bison?" Azula asked, eyeing Sokka in disbelief. "On top of that, I… I don't even know how I'll ever… how I'll ever fight you guys, if it comes to that. Any of you. I've learned so much about your skills, your abilities, your strengths and weaknesses… and I don't want to even picture going against you anymore. I…"

"Then don't picture it. Don't oppose us!" Sokka said, reaching for her hands with his. Azula blinked at the contact and gazed at him in confused disbelief. "Look… you don't want your dad to die? I get that. I don't want mine to die either. Granted, the war's not my dad's fault but… never mind, that's not the point! The thing is… Aang is a pacifist. He's a good kid. If it comes to it, maybe he won't want to kill your dad at all, and he'll find another way. We can all find other ways! You… you know him. You know your father better than anyone! If you want things to change, if you don't want us to defeat your nation, then… help us!"

"How does that make any sense…?" Azula asked, Sokka shook his head.

"Work with us," Sokka said. "See the world with us. Understand how many mistakes the Fire Nation made. And then, when we go see the Fire Lord… you can help him see reason. And if he won't? Then… we can try to defeat him without killing him. And you can take his place."

"I… what?!" Azula exclaimed. Her sadness was now replaced by utter disbelief. Sokka smiled awkwardly.

"Look… this is crazy, you and me. Maybe it's… too fast? Though, it was really fast with me and Yue too, so I don't know how to go slow, if anything" he chuckled "But I don't know how I'd fight against you either… not for real. I want you on my team. I want to be in yours. And heck… as big and burly and strong as the Fire Nation has tried to be, if you can tell already that the Avatar is going to overcome everything and bring back balance, what's the point of fighting? Your people will pay the price if the war continues to escalate and if Aang's involved, it will be turned against the Fire Nation eventually, just as it was in the North Pole. There can be a happy ending, Azula, if the war just… ends. If we don't have to go that far to make it stop. Look, I hate your dad… but if you can make him pull back his army and make amends as best he can for all the harm he and his forefathers did, I'd never ask for his death. I wouldn't need it. I don't need him to die, I just… I just need the world to make sense again. I just need a world where people don't have to die like Yue did. A world where… where I wouldn't lose you the way I lost her."

Azula didn't say anything for a moment, despite Sokka was gazing at her intensely, holding her hand as he was. He bit his lip at her silence, unsure of what to do… until she leaned closer, her lips hovering inches from his…

And then she lowered her head, pressing her face to his shoulder instead. Sokka bit his lip as her hand tightened around his, as her eyes closed tightly.

"You don't have to make a choice right away, right now," Sokka whispered, his thumb stroking the back of her hand. "But… you can choose anyway. Whatever Aang says or thinks… as far as I'm concerned, destiny can change if you want it to. If you fight to make it so."

Destiny…? Was that truly what guided them? Was there a force that kept them locked into set decisions and choices… or were they altering the world with each new step they took to oppose what was expected of them?

Azula raised her gaze, finding Sokka still watched her. She gritted her teeth before leaning in far more decisively: her lips brushed his lightly, and this time he kissed her wholeheartedly, no longer in as clumsy and silly a manner as he had while drinking cactus juice. That had still thrilled her when it happened, despite she hadn't wanted to feel giddy about it… but this? His arms held her closer, and her heart was beating so fast she thought it would burst from her chest. She liked this… she liked him. She really liked him.

Maybe she felt something stronger than that, even. For it seemed so did he.

She probably should have been losing her mind about how absurd it was to fall in love with the enemy. About how ridiculous it was to find herself so appealed by a Water Tribesman she had barely known for a few weeks. About how outrageous it would be that the exemplary, ideal Princess Azula had cast everything into the wind, forsaking all notions of being saved, of being found, of being her father's perfect child and heir… but somehow, the heart she had kept in check for so long was beating powerfully anew, filling her very soul with emotions and feelings that floored her. Emotions that she had thought she'd never feel… let alone for someone who embodied everything she should have never loved at all.

And yet that didn't stop her from falling asleep holding his hand that night. It didn't stop her from walking with him the next day, sharing awkward smiles, as she pondered her future some more. As she reasoned that there were so many choices left ahead of her: she could still push him away, if anything compelled her to… she could run away in Ba Sing Se, if she wanted to. Just so… she could stay, if she wanted to.

Granted, things weren't quite so cheerful anymore when the giant serpent attacked. That was quite the disaster: Toph fell into the water, leading both Sokka and Azula to jump in for her and swim her back to safety while Aang and Katara deflected the giant creature's attacks and ensured the refugees got through safely. And then? Then the pregnant one decided it was the ideal time to have her baby. Yes, of course Azula knew that wasn't something anyone just decides on, but she couldn't have picked a worse timing… yet huddling together with Sokka as they dried up after their incursion in the water wasn't the worst thing ever. And while the Avatar had still been somewhat miserable, it seemed he was far happier once Katara finished helping deliver the baby, and things should have moved along better from that point onwards, as they escorted the refugees to the city itself…

Until Aang saw the drill.

She knew what it was as soon as he described it. She knew exactly what was happening: it was a stratagem her father had plotted and concocted from a long time ago, commissioned to the inventor who had taken up refuge in the Northern Air Temple. It was on its way to tear down Ba Sing Se's walls, and it would breach all the way to the Earth Kingdom's Palace if it was uncontested… and it would be. It would be.

It was a won battle already. There was no way the five of them could stop them… and did she even want to stop them?

They climbed the Outer Wall and watched how Earth Kingdom troops were fighting back; the very sight of them told Azula she would have to make her choice far sooner than Sokka had intended her to. He eyed her with uncertainty often, though he didn't reveal his doubts… despite Azula could see in Aang, Katara and Toph's expressions that they were doubting, just as much as he was. It was the first time she had confronted her own nation by their side… and for all they knew, she would turn the fight around and help her nation, instead.

The so-called Terra Team attacked the drill relentlessly, but to no avail: their earthbending would never withstand the drill's might. The tanks that accompanied the drill had been cast away quickly, or so the earthbenders had believed, but they retaliated before long. And while the earthbenders fought fiercely, and defeated some of the firebenders, in the end their resistance amounted to nothing.

"So, the question is…" Aang said. "How are we going to stop that thing?"

All eyes turned towards Sokka, who had been studying the drill intently. He blinked blankly upon sensing he was being watched.

"Why are you all looking at me?" he said, grimacing.

"Because you're the idea guy," Aang answered, quickly.

"Oh, so I'm the only one can come up with a plan?" he retorted.

Well, no, no he wasn't the only one. But no one had asked her yet. And she wondered briefly if no one would.

"Azula?"

It was, of course, Sokka who called her name. He eyed her hopelessly, despite his tone seemed to suggest he clung to some sort of hope, regardless. The others watched him intently, and the Fire Nation Princess waited quietly for him to finish what he was saying.

"Do you know anything about this thing? Anything about how we can defeat it?" Sokka asked. Azula breathed deeply and raised her eyebrows, holding off from answering for almost ten whole, endless seconds:

"I might," she finally said. Sokka's eyes widened as the rest of the group gasped.

"Please, tell us!" Aang said, stepping towards her. "So many people will be in danger if we do nothing… Azula, I know you were our prisoner, but now? You're our friend. Please… help us save Ba Sing Se."

Her fist tightened. She frowned heavily. Cornered, forced to make up her mind, just as she was trying to enjoy the freedom of having a choice… brilliant.

"There's only one way to take down that thing," Azula said, dismissively. "And it's from within. We need to get inside the drill."

"Wait… we?" Sokka said, blinking blankly. Azula huffed, raising her eyebrows.

"Did you think you'd do this without me? That I'd sit out on my own plan?" she asked.

"Well… no. But, you know, you don't really have to join in if you don't want to," said Sokka, swallowing hard. "I know this isn't, well, anything you wanted to do, so…"

"Not like I have much of a choice anymore, do I?" Azula said, bluntly.

She proceeded to explain what she had in mind… and to her surprise, Sokka added his own ideas to her plan just as well. At first, her suggestions seemed to startle the others, for it sounded like a rather risky venture, one that could backfire so easily… and yet there was no other way. They had to trust her… to trust she knew that drill. To trust she wouldn't turn against them, even if her strange stiffness, her sudden distance, suggested she might.

They made their way down the wall again, gathered under a crevice: Toph whipped up a dust cloud and then a tunnel for them to travel through, unseen. Once they reached the drill, Sokka spotted a possible entrance, and Aang helped hoist each of them into the drill until Toph seemed to get cold feet at the last moment, choosing to stay on the ground and fight back from outside the drill instead.

"Okay, so we need the layout of this machine if we're going to figure out the best spots to break," Sokka said, looking around himself. Pipelines ran through the system, powering it, and before long, he settled on breaking one that appeared to be a source of gas rather than any other substance.

"What are you doing?!" Katara exclaimed.

"Someone's going to have to come fix it!" Sokka grinned. "And it'll probably be an engineer. We can just steal the drill's plans from him and be done with it!"

Azula bit her lip as she retreated into a dark corner with the group. Soon enough, an engineer did show up. Katara stepped out into the open…

Only for a sharp kick to her lower back to knock her to the floor.

"Wha…?!" Aang gasped. "KATARA!"

He had no time to respond: a sharp blow to the back of his neck knocked him unconscious just as well.

The last one left, of course, was Sokka. His eyes were wide with hurt, and Azula eyed him apologetically before striking him down too, digging her knee into his stomach.

"What is…?! What?! Princess?!" the engineer exclaimed.

"Ugh. It was about time," she said, rolling her eyes- "Please, help me bring those three to War Minister Qin. Clearly, one can't be captured around here and expect assistance, can they?"

"We heard you were missing in action, but we trusted you'd prevail!" exclaimed the engineer.

"Enough with the pointless excuses!" Azula shouted, freezing the man in place with her harsh words. "We have work to do. That city will be ours."

She glared at Sokka, who squirmed, the only one still conscious, on the floor. He gazed at her pleadingly, but her eyes' sharp, golden steel offered no respite. She had made her choice. She would simply have to figure out if she could live with it.

"You're ALIVE! It's a miracle! You've returned to us, Princess!" War Minister Qin was exclaiming happily, and Sokka would shoot glares at him from the top-most observation deck's floor. His sister and the Avatar, tied beside him against a railing, were doing the same thing, now they were back to their senses. "Oh, the Fire Lord will be thrilled that you are, and that you brought the Avatar with you, too! Today marks a grand victory for our great nation!"

"That it does, War Minister, for sure," Azula declared, languishing carelessly on a throne-like chair that still stank of the War Minister's stale perfume. Of course, the man had been happy to sit here until she had arrived. No doubt, despite all his apparent bliss over her return, he was definitely distraught about having to share his triumph with her. "Are we progressing well so far?"

"Perfectly on schedule, Princess! We should make contact with the outer wall within the next ten minutes!"

"Ten minutes, is it?" she said, raising her eyebrows. "How utterly sluggish and slow is this damn machine that it would take that long? This… this is truly a pathetic strategy. Did that Mechanist design this machine deliberately to stall us?"

"Well…! We have, yes, suspected as much, but… surely that's not the case! And even if it were, we'll keep going, Princess, of course!" said the War Minister.

Azula huffed, raising her chin haughtily.

"Full speed ahead, War Minister."

"F-full…? Well, we are going at the safest speed we can…"

"Full speed, I said!"

"R-right! Yes, Princess!"

It wasn't a good idea, he knew: the system was delicate, despite how sturdy it was from the outside. Any overloading of materials could cause a clog within the machine's drill, and if that happened… oh, her recklessness could doom their whole enterprise. She shouldn't demand for this, but how to say no?

The drill began moving faster, digging up earth from down below to move forward. A sharp glance at the three that sat, gagged and restrained, on the floor… Azula rose to her feet, and the War Minister nearly winced as Azula gestured at the periscope.

"Please, keep watch. Ensure we're headed in the right direction at all times, War Minister."

A rather ridiculous order, and yet again, the War Minister rushed to the periscope and abided by it. All other eyes on the command module were set on their respective tasks, too, for they were busy setting up everything so the Princess's full-speed order would be heeded…

And so, none of them saw the Princess step towards the three captives and burn off their restraints.

It was a rather strange but amusing pandemonium: Aang's airbending took everyone by surprise as he crafted a whirlwind inside the command module. Sokka rushed towards his weapons and Katara's water pouches, which the War Minister had requisitioned: together they took to taking down the rest of the engineers within the room… while Azula had a rather violent firebending showdown with the two Imperial Firebenders within the module, tasked with the protection of their mission. The War Minister screamed desperately, no doubt searching for a place to go… only for Sokka to deliver an uppercut at him, knocking him unconscious right away.

"HA!"

There wasn't too much time to celebrate yet, though: he rushed to help Azula, tossing his boomerang to distract one of the firebenders. The Princess smirked at him, taking the opportunity to deliver a most lethal charged fire blast at the firebender's stomach from the soles of her shoes, after she performed a somersault that left Sokka gaping in wonder at her skill. The next firebender attempted to attack only for Azula to dodge him, trip him with a firebending kick, and leave him for Sokka to finish off with a powerful blow of his club to his helmet, a sure way to knock someone out.

By the time the two main firebenders were done, everyone else was either surrendering or had given up already. And so, Azula made her way to the machines, switching each value to its opposite one as violently as possible, both to ensure the drill would either collapse fully or at least move in the wholly opposite direction.

"We did it! We stopped the drill!" Aang exclaimed, hugging Katara excitedly.

"And it didn't even reach the Outer Wall!" Sokka said, beaming brightly as he helped Azula with busting the machine. "Princess, your plan was GENIUS!"

It wasn't long before some loud explosion resounded through the mechanism: of course, so many careless commands would eventually be too many for the machine. It would break down – without exploding, hopefully – and it would be out of commission for good, as long as the Earth Kingdom's authorities took the machine and dissembled it safely…

Azula released a deep breath before turning to smile at Sokka. He stood beside her, grinning just as brightly as he had when he had been intoxicated… though far more earnestly, this time.

"I was sent to hunt down a traitor and a failure…" she said. "And I guess I'm the traitor now, huh?"

"Definitely not the other thing, though," Sokka said, beaming. "I always knew you were the best your dad could send after us! Look at this! You tore them down in one go! This was…! You're just…! Hell, I…"

"You have something to say, yes?" Azula asked, amused. "Are you going to sing praises about me? Declare me the greatest being that ever lived? Or perhaps will you say embarrassing things such as 'I melt in your hands' once again?"

"Y-yeah, well…" he chuckled, his hands on her shoulders. "You know what? Yes, I can say I definitely melt in your firebending hands, Azula. Especially after today. I know what this means to you. I know how much you're sacrificing for, well… us. But I think… or rather, I hope? That it'll turn out okay in the end?"

"I sure hope so too. Because if not, you'll have to refund me for all this faith I'm putting in you," Azula said, pointing at him and pressing her index finger to his chest. Sokka chuckled, lowering his gaze. "Make sure I won't regret this, alright? Tall, warrior boy?"

"I can think of an idea or two to achieve that, dangerous, beautiful Princess," he grinned.

His brow pressed against hers just before he kissed her, fully. Aang blinked blankly as he watched them – as did the conscious crew members of the drill, gaping in utter disbelief at their Princess's shameless behavior: wasn't she supposed to be the good kid, as opposed to her brother?

"Woah," Aang managed, but Katara laughed beside him, tugging him away, towards the people they'd have to keep watch over.

"Come on, it's not polite to stare," she said.

"You're taking this way too well, huh?" Aang grinned. Katara shrugged.

"What can I say? I guess she grew on me, just a little," she smiled. "Besides… this way you'll have a firebending teacher, right?"

"And she'll be the best teacher ever!" Sokka declared, revealing he and Azula had stopped kissing by then, though his arm remained wrapped around her shoulders. She gasped.

"Hey! I never did say I'd do that, did I?" she asked. Sokka laughed and shrugged.

"And why wouldn't you?" he said. "It'll be fun!"

Azula groaned and shook her head, though she smiled as her friends laughed together. Her friends… new friends, who hadn't wanted her for her title, her position, her privilege. Friends who had shared their meals, even their bedding with her, who had worried about her, who had protected her… and whom she had protected, just as well. It was a strange sensation, one she wasn't sure she had ever felt before… but as she stood there, an arm wrapped around Sokka's waist, watching his most goofy, cheerful grin, Azula guessed she melted in his hands just as well, for this was exactly where she wanted to be.

"So… do you really think Zuko is going to be somewhere around here?" Ty Lee asked, nonchalantly, at Mai. "Maybe we really should've gone back to find Azula… she would've tracked him easier than us."

"We had the beasts, she had nothing. If she didn't come back to us, it's because she couldn't. There's no reason to think she would've done any better than we have," Mai sighed.

The damn ferry station was a pain: she and Ty Lee had secured outfits to blend in as Earth Kingdom, dreary colorful stuff she would never wear if she could help it. Then, they'd tracked down two people and with her knives, threatened them out of their passports and tickets. They had raced away, crying… and Ty Lee had certainly seemed sorry for it, but Mai wasn't too bothered about the matter. Surely Azula would've done worse to people if she'd wanted what she didn't have, right?

But the damnable ferry just wouldn't arrive, would it? The sooner they reached that damn huge city, the sooner she'd be close to tracking down Zuko…

"Uh… huh? Mai! Mai!"

Mai's eyes drifted towards the direction Ty Lee was pointing at: the passports lady was speaking to two newcomers: a short, balding man with a silver beard… and a young man with dark hair, and a rather violent scar across his face.

"You… you figured it out! You found him!" Ty Lee exclaimed, beaming. "Aww! This is soooo romantic!"

Despite the discomfort of the situation hadn't decreased in the least, Mai smiled: maybe this ferry station wasn't so bad, after all.

[gyldowen-draws]

What's this? A Rhys playlist? On MY blog? It's more likely than you think!

Music has always been a huge inspiration for my writing and my art, so I wanted to share some of the songs that match Rhys' Vibe™️

I would absolutely love any recommendations for songs that would fit my dearest bastard! Please, please, please send them my way ^.^

Analysis under the cut!

(Just a note: I make a lot of references to Rhys' backstory so if you'd like some context, it's in his ref sheet!)

Fake Your Death: First of all, this is a 10/10 great song all by itself. From the driving drums and piano to the melancholy yet determined delivery of the excellent lyrics, it perfectly captures Rhys' life, always having to move from job to job and literally having to fake his death a couple of times. Some lines that really stick out are, "But even good guys still get paid", "I choose defeat/ I walk away/ and leave this place the same today" and "Just look at all that pain" but honestly every line could accurately describe Rhys and his feelings. If I had to chose one song to represent my boy Rhys, this would be it. Thank you Mr. Way for my life.

Dance on a Volcano: This amazing and energetic song is just a perfect metaphor for Rhys' entire life: in a dangerous situation all alone, not knowing exactly what to do, not able to look back, having to keep moving forward no matter what, the need to get it right. Plus the flame/lava imagery is just perfect for my fire mage. The line "Out of the night and out of the dark/ Into the fire and into the fight/ Well that's where all the heroes go" is just *chef's kiss* perfection. Additionally the line "Whatever you do/ you'd better start doing it right" was the inspiration for the title of my fic series about Rhys and Yor!

This is Gospel: Another great song that captures more of Rhys' internal drive for freedom and fear of vulnerability. And the song's inversion of religious gospel connects to Rhys' background growing up in the Cult of Miriar. To top it all off, he's definitely an "insufferable bastard", so this song's for him!

Dukes Up: This song perfectly encapsulates how Rhys' solution to every problem is violence. Plus it has a rawness to it that fits Rhys perfectly. Short, gritty, and full of raw anger. Just like Rhys!

Training Montage: To me, this song fits Rhys' time in the prison camp and when he decided to give up his life as a con man to become a full-time mercenary instead. The absolute determination in this song is amazingly accurate to how he puts his mind to things. Also the chorus is an incredible representation of his motivations in life. He wants to live in a way that goes entirely against what he was taught in the Cult, a revenge for his childhood. His main goal is to stay true to himself, but he's still figuring out who he is. He feels incredible guilt for killing some of his fellow Vessels and leaving them all behind in the Cult. Most of all, everything he does is for his younger self.

Thus Always to Tyrants: A great Rhys and Yor song! I love how it comes out strong with the lines "Let me die, let me drown/ Leave my bones in the ground", a very Rhys thing. It also does a wonderful job of contrasting the demands at the beginning with the questions at the end of the song, representing these two head-strong men coming together and trying to work out a relationship when neither really knows what they're doing. Also, the line "learn to love without consuming" is just so perfect for their relationship.

Like Real People Do: Absolutely gorgeous song! This is THE Rhys and Yor song. Everything about this song is perfectly accurate. From the understanding that they are both deeply haunted by their pasts to the respect that comes with not wanting to dredge up what is better kept hidden, the lyrics embody Yor's perspective on his budding relationship with the cagey Rhys. The idea that they can both put aside their hurts to find their humanity together through their love is so poignant and beautiful!

Wolves of the Revolution: This song represents a young Rhys, who - freshly escaped from the Cult of Miriar - discovers that the world outside his village is nearly as dangerous and unjust as the hell he just came from. The lines that really stick out are "There was blood in the air/ I was on all fours/ screaming life isn't fair", "born young and wild/ don't let them cut your tail" and "Just a pinch of salt in the wound/ you'll be fine". The soft, melancholy air of the entire song fits the struggles young Rhys faced as he navigated his new freedom all alone.

All These Things That I've Done: It's no secret, Rhys is an absolute bastard who has done plenty of questionable things over the course of his long life, but he still desires validation and understanding like any other person. The almost plaintive yet determined quality to the delivery of the lyrics fits Rhys in this context perfectly. With lines like "I want a meaning from the back of my broken hand", "I'm so much older than I can take", "These changes ain't changing me/ the cold-hearted boy I used to be", and "You know, you know - no you don't, you don't", this song provides a great window into Rhys' psyche. Can he find acceptance in himself and others for all the things he's done?

[romirola]

Hi Romi! I don’t think I’ve ever requested a fic ever, despite reading a lot of them!

Today I come carrying a prompt (since I am on writers block atm), I REALLY want to see what you can do with it !!

“You’re the only one who can save me!”

“If I do, there’s no turning back from the future.”

“I don’t care. I want you. I need you.”

You can decide who the characters would be >:) it’s more surprising that way and I love it when stories catch me off guard

I hope it’s not asking for too much! Take your time, and thank you!

Hello, @veneli and Anon! Thanks for your requests! They seemed to pair really well together, so I did. Hope you both enjoy!

Rating: G, WC: ~1.7K, Prompts: “You’re the only one who can save me!,” “If I do, there’s no turning back from the future,” “I don’t care. I want you. I need you,” Angel finding David crying, David/Angel

Inversion Spoilers Below!

When Angel stepped into their apartment after a long day at work, all they wanted to do was take a long, hot shower, devour the leftover chicken pot pie they knew David had saved for them last night, and finally watch the new documentary on Mary, Queen of Scots that had been in their queue all week. They had their heart set on those three activities, in that order, to start off their weekend. Once they heard muffled sobs coming from the living room, however, nothing else mattered but making their way to the couch. 

They kicked off their shoes and made their way towards the distressing sound.

Even though they knew no one but David Shaw could be the source of those sobs, they were still so surprised to see their mate hunched over on himself, forehead pressed to his knees and softly shuddering. 

“Davey?” they asked tentatively, approaching him like they would a scared animal. “Davey, are you okay?”

David flinched at Angel’s gentle question. He twisted his neck to face them, furiously scrubbing at his eyes.  "Oh, h-h-hi," he coughed out to conceal the catch in his voice. "You're home early. How was your day?" 

Angel glanced at the wall clock hanging above their heart. "It's 5:30PM," they gently corrected. They usually got home around this time, unless they were booked for some last-minute overtime.

"It is!?" David gasped, grabbing his phone to confirm that fact. “Fuck. I didn’t realize I was sitting here this long.” He threaded his fingers through the hair at the back of his head. “I’ve been wasting time. I- I’m sorry, Angel. I didn’t even start to get dinner ready or anything.” He was about to push himself up from the couch until Angel sat down next to him, silently asking him to stay right there. David always took great pride in cooking their dinner on the rare days that saw him arrive home well before Angel. It had become a little ritual for him that kept him from missing them too much. 

“That’s okay, that’s totally okay,” they assured him. “I was hoping we could order delivery anyway today,” Angel lied to keep David from feeling too badly about something that didn’t seem remotely important after they saw David’s tears. “I won’t push you to tell me about what I know you know I saw,” they said, careful to be sensitive to David’s vulnerability but open enough to show him it was not something for which he should feel shame. “But no matter what you do or don’t want to say, I know I can be here for you the whole time.” Angel rested their palm on David’s thigh.

To their surprise and relief, David captured their hand in his, bringing it to his face to kiss it gently before scooting over closer so that he could lean his forehead into Angel’s neck. He inhaled deeply, Angel’s very scent bringing him a sense of safety he would’ve never thought possible. “Angel,” he said involuntarily, hugging them tightly. “Angel, it… I…” 

Angel kept a firm grasp on David, stroking his broad back. 

He swallowed, starving off the tears so he could at least tell his mate what had him so rattled. “Today, when I was at work, two people came up to me who had been involved in the… The E&E Games.” 

It had been six months since that awful tragedy, and while Angel was so proud of David for all the progress he had made in processing his traumatic experience, they still knew that the event was far from behind David. 

“They thanked me for what I did, what the whole pack did,” he quickly revised. “And when I asked them how they were, y’know, coping with the whole thing, one of them said th-that their father didn’t make it out of there alive.” David’s weight sank into Angel’s, like even speaking that one, horrible thought drained him of his energy. “Their father died and they thanked me, Angel. They thanked me! D-do you know how hard that had to be for them? How incredibly painful and grievous and just plain awful going through something like that is? The unexpected death of a parent. I mean, that guy woke up in the morning, showed up to the games excited to support his child, and probably never even got to say goodbye. Just, poof, gone!” David snapped his fingers. “And instead of blaming me or letting bitterness consume them or even just choosing not to say anything, they walked right up to me, asked to shake my hand, and thanked me for all the people we did save.”

“Including them,” Angel gently reminded him.  

David began to cry again, large tears soaking through Angel’s shirt collar. They held him tightly, marvelling at his ability to feel so deeply despite his best efforts to claim the contrary. 

“So many fathers, mothers, family, friends, siblings…” he listed, gasping through sobs and pants. “All dead. It makes me think of when I lost my dad,” he recalled. “And I was so angry, so bitter, so full of rage and grief and confusion that I barely knew which way was up. I isolated myself and I was a complete and total mess. I would’ve never been that strong. And there are so many other people out there just like them. Sitting down to dinner without their partner. Never getting another call from their mother again. Birthdays and holidays and so much pain.” David balled a fist into Angel’s shirt, not even cognizant of how he sought their physical support. “And these people thanked me! How could they do that? Why would they? I’m the reason their father is dead and they thanked me!”

“No, no, Davey,” Angel soothed, whispered into his ear as he continued to break down into a puddle. “You are not the reason why their father is dead. Those awful shades are. It wasn’t your fault. None of it, Davey.” They tipped their chin so that their cheek rested on the top of David’s hair. One more place to offer him some grounding, tactile contact. “It’s amazing how resilient people can be in the face of such horrible events.”

David silently nodded. He was still breathing unevenly, though Angel was pretty sure his tears stopped. 

“And sometimes it’s those tragic circumstances that push people to find it within themselves to keep going,” Angel continued. “To persevere. To keep their loved ones’ memories alive by celebrating their life and not letting themselves drown in the grief. ” 

“I don’t know how they do it,” David admitted. “Losing someone so close to them like that and still choosing to go on. It all was so sudden, and so futile. How do they make sense of that?”

Angel shrugged. David could see it with his face pressed into their collarbone, but he felt the muscles in their body contact at their movement. “They lean on each other?” they suggested. “Find comfort in being there for others? Resolve not to let themselves slip away because they have other people in their life who need them, too? I don’t know if I have a real answer, Davey.” Angel sighed. “But I know that you and I are going to get through this together. We will,” they declared. “I’m not going to let you drown in grief alone like last time. I’m here for you, always.”

David shifted his weight, sitting up a bit but still leaning heavily into Angel. “You’re the only one who can save me from that.” He kissed their neck, so grateful for Angel’s existence and so woefully unprepared to inform them just how much they meant to him. “It’s going to get easier, right? It has to. I don’t know what’s going to happen to us if it doesn’t. I can’t… I can’t keep feeling like this forever. If I do, there’s no turning back from the future. What kind of a future would that even be? My dad’s death almost killed me. It really did,” he observed sadly. “But I never felt this crushing guilt before. And I don’t know how to make it stop. But I need to! I mean, they lost their father, and fought off those shades while they were trapped in there, too. If they can do it, I have to, too.”

“Well, consider yourself saved,” Angel responded lightly. “Because I’ll always be here for you.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t be.” David’s face crumpled at thought, but he doggedly kept on with his claim. “I know how hard this has all been on you, too, Angel. I know how hard it can be to be the shoulder to cry on.” A laugh stumbled out of David’s lips. “Literally.”  

“I don’t care,” Angel protested without wavering. “I want you. I need you. I don’t care how long it takes or what we have to go through to get there, Davey. We’ll come out on the other side of this. It’s not a race. And everyone’s finish line is at a different distance.” They curled their hand along David’s ear, knowing it was a sensitive spot for him in both human and wolf form. “You’re carrying so much from this ordeal, David. You’ve gotta find a way to let yourself set some of it down. It won’t be all at once. We both know that.” Their lips tugged into a tight line as they thought of how David’s leadership position as alpha had imparted so much sadness that weighed so heavily on his mind. “But a little bit. You can do that,” they predicted with the confidence David had grown so used to depending on in times of turmoil. “I know you can, Davey.”

David swallowed, kissing Angel one more time before he found the strength to push himself up into a sitting position. “For you, Angel,” he sighed. “For you, I can do anything. Even that. Thank you,” he said, sounding a little bit like himself again. “Thank you for helping me. For being someone I can love. For loving me. You’re amazing. An angel brought down to Earth to save me from, well, everything, including myself.”  

Angel could’ve sworn they saw a glint in David’s eyes return and an invisible weight lift off of his shoulders for the first time since the Inversion “I love you, Davey,” they said before kissing him again.  

[yesttoheaven]

AMOR FATI

pairing – neil x female!reader

wc – 3.8k

warnings – mention of death, self-blame, anxious/intrusive thoughts, questioning reality, refusal of help, guns, stalking, but I swear there's a light at the end of the tunnel haha

a/n – The last time I suffered so hard for the death of a character, was when Newt died (Maze Runner) and now Neil has captured all my attention and his death has hit me in the same way 😩 I needed a happy ending so I decided to write this!

The Eternal Return and Amor Fati mentioned in this fic are one of the main ideas of Nietzsche's philosophy.

English is not my first language. I am getting help from google translator and he is not always a good ally, so I apologize for any typos or grammar errors.

Y/N – your name

She approached the painting hanging on the wall, watching the details closely. Ouroboros. A serpent eating its own tail. Months ago, when Y/N was visiting an antique store in Mumbai, she saw that same symbol. The owner of the establishment approached when she realized her interest in the piece and explained that Ouroboros represents the ideas of movement, continuity and, in consequence, Eternal Return. A concept that the universe and all existence and energy has been recurring, and will continue to recur, in a self-similar form an infinite number of times across infinite time or space.

"Max finally fell asleep." Kat returned to the living room, attracting Y/N's attention.

She walked away from the painting, taking back her seat on the sofa and asked:

"How is he after everything that happened?"

For a moment, Kat looked at the painting on the wall and then at the friend she won in the midst of confusion over the Algorithm. At that time, despite being fighting on the front lines to prevent a possible Third World War, Y/N seems complete. Happy. Today that happiness no longer exists in her eyes.

Letting out a sigh, the woman sat next to her, answering:

"Sator was never a present father. He was always busy... now i can see the kind of work he was involved in. Anyway, Max just got used to his absence."

"It's notable that he's happier at your side. When we first met Max was a bit of an introvert, but today he is radiant." Y/N confessed, showing a small smile and the blonde shook her head, agreeing with her words. "How's everything?"

"Perfectly well. It's weird sometimes... After years of being stuck in a failed relationship, freedom is good."

"It seems like life is good for one of us." The woman let out a bitter laugh, putting the latest events on a scale, but she didn’t want her friend to think she wasn’t happy for her. She really was. "I'm sorry, I just..." The words remain stuck in her throat, while she covers her face with her hands. In addition to physical and mental fatigue, Y/N tried to hide her grief.

Kat touched her shoulder, showing that she was here.

"I know you're hurt, but it's been three months and you never talked about what happened that day... This is not good for you."

"What do I have to say, Kat? The guy I fell in love with was a fucking time traveler! And now he's dead and I don't know what to do. My life just... stopped without him."

"I can imagine how difficult it's for you to cross that line without Neil at your side, but giving up is not an option. Grief is consuming you little by little and you are just accepting it..."

"We are trained to contain our emotions and deal with death in the best possible way. It used to be easy for me, but then he came and turned my life upside down." Y/N put her hands on her knees and stood up, walking without an exact destination. "Neil was always one step ahead of us all..." She stepped forward too and found the painting again, but her mind was lost in thoughts about him. Neil knew her so well. And he had a charming smile, but completely arrogant at the same time. "I was sent to Mumbai to help two agents and when I arrived at Priya's penthouse that night, there he was. When he saw me, that was the first and only time that he let his guard down. I'll never forget how he looked at me, it was one of those breathtaking moments... Completely cliché, I know."

On the sofa, Kat was impressed. When Y/N turned towards her, there was a bright smile on her face. The simple memory brought her a breath of happiness and Kat enjoyed seeing her friend like that, but unfortunately that moment did not last long. Memories aren't enough. Neil is dead and nothing can change that.

"I miss him so much, Kat." The smile disappeared as soon as tears appeared in her eyes, cascading down her cheeks.

"My dear..." Worried about her, the woman got up quickly and approached Y/N, wrapping her in a tight hug. "I'm really sorry."

"I spent the last three months locked up in my a-apartment because I thought I could handle this situation on my own. At times I b-believed it was just a fever dream... Maybe I was losing my mind, but this is proof that everything was real." Through tears blurring her vision, she looked at the watch on her wrist, remembering that night.

Y/N was in a private cabin on the ship. The others were with Ives and Wheeler, going over the mission in search of any loose ends. A standard procedure. Y/N knew she should be with them, but she needed a moment alone to organize her thoughts. And that moment is now. The past few weeks had been a real mess. The inversion was difficult to explain and mainly to understand. She was used to field missions, but being an inverted soldier on the battlefield was not in her plans. Either way, she agreed to be a part of it and running away with biased assumptions was not going to help. Humanity depends on them.

Three knocking on the door caught Y/N's attention, but she remained silent, waiting for the person to give up and leave, but when it didn't, she just murmured 'Come in'.

"So, here you are." The man used a surprised tone of voice and closed the door behind him. "What will our superior think when he learns that you are running away from the briefing?"

She let out a laugh before answering in the same mood:

"Don't worry, I know this mission like the back of my hand. I just needed a moment."

"There's something wrong? Are you ok?" Neil spilled the questions quickly, visibly concerned for her.

"Yeah, I'm fine, Neil." Y/N smiled at him, but looked away just seconds later, confessing: "Maybe I'm a little surprised by the situation. I have spent years dealing with terrorists, but the inversion is really not my point."

"I'm not good with advice, but someone once said to me: Don't try to understand. Certain things in the world do not need an explanation."

"It's wise advice, but I'm a methodical person. Logic has always been my ally in missions."

"A methodical person, huh?" He asked with an arrogant smile playing on his lips and she just rolled her eyes. "I know how worried you were when Sator shot Kat, but we are using the inversion to save the world and you're one of the most brilliant agents I have ever seen. Everything will be fine."

"Are you praising me?"

"What's that? Can't I praise my partner's talent?" Neil pulled up a chair to sit across from her, crossing his arms.

"In that case, thank you. Remind me to put this on my resume." Those words made him laugh and that sound could easily be compared to music in her ears.

Touching her knee, Neil added:

"We are very confident with the mission. You don't need to worry."

"Are you sure?"

"I cannot say that unforeseen events do not happen, but we are prepared for that." Y/N knew he was right, but this mission is the biggest one so far. It's not about saving a country. It's about saving the entire world. This was arousing insecurities in her and it was like walking in a minefield. Ironically, she was familiar with this, but not in such catastrophic proportions. "I want you to have this." The man took his watch off his wrist and handed it to her.

"What’s that supposed to mean?" The question came out as a whisper from between her lips.

It didn't make sense. Why does everything in this conversation look like a farewell?

"We will be on opposite sides tomorrow, but i want you to know... I will always be with you, Y/N."

"I saw the way he looked at you... That's how I used to look at Sator before he became a monster in my life." Kat started, running a hand through Y/N's hair. "When I was lying on that stretcher and partially drugged with the medicines, I saw him beside you... watching you sleep. There was so much love in his eyes. Love for a lifetime, Y/N. So don't do this to yourself. The way he left hurt us all, but there was nothing you or any other agent could do to change what happened at Stalask-12. Neil saved the world. This gave us a second chance. You cannot give up now. This organization needs you. And keeping your mind busy at that moment is the first step towards a fresh start."

"N-No, I can't..." She broke the hug, shaking her head in denial. "I left the organization."

"What? Don't you work for Tenet anymore? But when we first met you told me that you can't imagine working in another area... And that this is your life's work."

"Being an agent is my life's work. I was in Yemen when Tenet found me and assigned me to this mission. My only job is to make this world a less hostile place, but the motto of this organization is not what I believe, Kat. What's happened's happened. Really? It doesn't work for me." Y/N ended the sentence with drops of anger in her voice and Kat did not say a single word.

Through the newspapers, Max's mother followed what was happening in Yemen over the years – a real endless war – and knowing that Y/N was in the middle of it, makes the situation unquestionable. People died in front of her eyes. Friends of the corporation. And then some time later, Tenet arrived with a fresh start, but in the end everything remained the same. She lost Neil. It is as if her life's work never had a happy ending because the world will never stop being a hostile place.

"He knows?" It was easy for Y/N to identify who she was talking about. The Protagonist. Or just TP.

"Here's another problem. I worked with him and indirectly worked for him at the same time! God, that man created this organization! And his name remains a mystery to us all!" She pinched the tip of her nose, feeling frustrated with all the secrets that haunt this organization. "And answering your question, yes, he knows, but he did not argue about it. I was a complete mess and he was not doing very well either... He stayed in my apartment for the first month, probably to make sure I didn't do anything stupid." And Y/N would be forever grateful for that. She likes him. Just as friends, of course. TP was a reserved man, but it was he who held her when everything was falling apart. "But we've had a fight. I blamed him for what happened at Stalask-12 and since then we haven't spoken anymore."

It was easy to see that they carried more pain than they could actually bear. Y/N lost her great love and the man lost his best friend. The situation just turned into a conflict between them and that was the result.

Realizing the sadness reflected in Y/N's eyes, Kat decided to change the subject of the conversation. Keeping that thought, she smiled and pointed to the painting on the wall. Maybe that could help.

"You seemed interested in this one."

"Oh yes, in my spare time I am a lover of art and its meanings. It is really attractive the way Ouroboros is connected to the Eternal Return..."

"And Amor Fati too." Kat completed, piquing Y/N's curiosity. This part was new to her. "It's impossible to affirm the Eternal Return without loving life. We need to learn that things happen as they do. Sometimes seemingly good. Sometimes seemingly bad. We don’t always get it our way... Unless we choose that whatever way it is, is our way. When we choose to Amor Fati, to love everything that happens, to love our fate, then we will always get it our way. Because the way it is, is the way it is. Unchangable. And therefore it must be good, even if it sucks."

These words touched Y/N's heart. This was a contradiction to what she is experiencing right now. Love your fate. She would like to understand and accept what happened, she really wanted, but why is it so difficult to move on?

Because Neil is dead.

That was the only explanation for her. The end of a relationship would be more acceptable. If he were alive, things would be completely different now. However, grief is overwhelming. How could she just accept what happened?

"I... I gotta go." That was all she managed to say before picking up her bag and leave the penthouse, ignoring Kat's protests.

When the elevator doors closed, an exhausted sigh left her mouth and the instant she saw her reflection in the mirror, Y/N wanted to cry again. After three months alone, she thought visiting her friend would be a good idea. Kat was willing to help, but the problem was that Y/N is not allowing herself to be helped. As soon as the doors opened, she left the metal box and found the hotel lobby partially empty. Her watch showed it was 3:13 AM, this explains the absence of people on the street as well. In front of her car, she searched the bag for the key and coincidentally her cell phone started to vibrate. Probably the text messages were from Kat, but confusion hit Y/N the instant she looked at the identifier and saw that the messages did not belong to any of her contacts.

Stay away from the car

They put a bomb

I'm on my way

Her first reaction was to take a few steps back and look around, trying to understand what’s going on and find the person responsible for these texts, but Y/N was alone in the dark street. When she thought it might be an unnecessary prank, a black SUV approached at high speed. The car stopped just a few meters away from where she was, but that was enough to make her body freeze.

"Y/N, come on!" The man exclaimed, the urgency in his voice would have made her run immediately, but she didn't move. Her feet had frozen on the floor. This cannot be real. "Come on, get in the car! We don't have much time!" He tried again, it was possible to hear the sound of the other cars approaching.

Y/N watched in slow motion the moment he left the car and ran towards her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"How is this possible?" She asked in a whisper, completely lost in his blue eyes.

"It's good to see you too." Neil admitted, feeling his heart race. She looked so fragile in his arms. Very different from the last time he saw her. "We have to go." He accompanied her to the car and as soon as Y/N took the passenger seat, he returned to his seat.

For her this moment was like a fever dream, so she just looked down and started counting her fingers. One, two, three, four, five... Neil noticed, but said nothing, just kept driving. The cars were fast approaching, but he would do everything possible and impossible to get Y/N away from these people.

"Give me your cell phone." He looked at her for a brief moment, but when Y/N didn’t react, he wasn't sure if she heard it, so he just took the phone from her hand and threw it out the window. That was enough to get her out of the numbness:

"What the fuck, Neil?!"

Despite the adrenaline rushing through his body, the man laughed.

"If I found you because of your cell phone, they can too." After that, he crossed the red light and made a risky turn, trying to end this chase. "Before you ask, no, this is not a dream. Unfortunately this is very real..." Neil didn't like what he saw when he adjusted the rearview mirror. "And now they are getting ready to shoot us."

That observation put Y/N on alert and she looked back, seeing a man with an AKS-74U and another with a Beretta M12.

"If you knew it wasn't a dream, why didn't you bring an armored car?" She ran her tongue between her lips, smiling at the man beside her. Neil tried to argue, but she just took off her seat belt and picked up the Glock 19 stuck in the vest he was wearing.

Y/N crawled out of the car and sat at the window opening. This encouraged the men in the two cars to start shooting, trying desperately to hit her. Neil shouted something that she couldn't understand and then she felt one of his hands on her thigh, giving her stability to continue with the plan. With her arm resting on the roof of the vehicle, Y/N aimed the gun at the car that was closest to them. Her intention was not to start a firefight in the middle of one of the main avenues in the city, but she had no other option. Holding her breath, she fired the first shot and the bullet hit the tire, taking the car out of circulation. Y/N celebrated while preparing for the second car, but dealing with this one was not an easy task. Now they were in a tunnel and, consequently, losing speed because of the other cars that came along the way. Neil left two pats on her leg, indicating that she had better get back in the car and that is what she did. Screams, honks and gunshots echoed through the tunnel, turning the place into a war zone. Whoever these men were, Y/N knew they weren't going to give up.

Tired of playing cat and mouse, she went to the back seat, getting on her knees. Through the broken glass above the trunk, Y/N adjusted the aim of her gun, ignoring the sniper and focusing on the driver. With another accurate shot, the bullet hit the man's chest and he lost control of the vehicle. The car overturned for a while, streaking the asphalt, but no other car was involved in the accident. Y/N sighed in relief and looked for another possible threat, just checking, but when she realized that the area was clean, she returned to the passenger seat, leaving the gun on the dashboard in front of her.

"Next time I'm going to get an armored car." Neil comments, stepping on the gas. "Nice shot, by the way."

"Anytime." Y/N smiled, trying to control her breathing.

With the adrenaline disappearing from her body, it was hard for her to believe that this was really happening. For many nights she cried, wondering what it would be like if Neil just came back to her, but now she was afraid to wake up and realize that it was just another vivid dream.

The sun was rising when they arrived in a shed away from the city. Seen from the outside, the place was a little scary, but the interior wasn't that bad. There was some equipment like trackers, walkie-talkie, bulletproof vests, weapons, ammunition; a table with a mess of papers and on the other side two beds and something that Y/N supposed to be a private bathroom.

"Where we are?"

We. That simple word echoed in her mind. Y/N thought that "we" didn't exist anymore.

"For now in a safe place. It's dangerous for you out there." He answered the question and took a bottle of water, handing it to her after taking a generous sip.

"Who are these people, Neil?" She wanted answers, lots of answers, and that frustrated the british spy because for the first time he didn't know what could happen.

Neil had a mission and that mission ended with him dying in Stalask-12, but after what TP did, everything changed.

"We have a name..." He wanted to say more, he wanted to reassure her, but that was all he had at the moment.

Y/N drank some water and left the bottle on the table, looking at some reports and photos. All photos were of the same man.

Lenard Vaher

"But apparently they don't just want you..."

It took a few seconds and when the realization hit Y/N, concern appeared on her face.

No, not him.

"Where's TP? He's safe, right?"

"He was going to see you when Lenard's men kidnapped him. This happened three weeks ago." And considering the anger in Neil's voice, finding TP was proving an almost impossible task, but in the midst of so much concern, one point attracted Y/N's attention.

"You said he was going to see me..."

"There was something he needed to tell you." Neil sighed, resting his hands on the table. A few strands of blond hair fell over his forehead, but he quickly shook his head back, as he always did. "He returned to Stalask-12, Y/N."

After that statement, the only sound that could be heard was Neil's footsteps closing the distance between them and the first thing she did was put her hand on his chest, feeling his heartbeat. Neil smiled. And that was not one of his famous smiles. That was a shy smile. His heart was beating like a drum and it was all because of her. Loving Y/N was something so special and pure, that Neil accepted his fate without a second thought. Saving the world, he was giving her a second chance to live, but now he is the one who received a second chance.

"I missed you every day." Before she could begin to consider the meaning behind his words, he settled his mouth upon hers, robbing her of thought.

She closed her eyes and melted against him, flattening her hands on his arms. Neil caught her bottom lip in his teeth, nibbling and licking at it until she thought she might perish from the intensity of the feeling. She whimpered at the sensation, and he rewarded the sound by deepening the kiss, giving her everything she desired. His tongue stroked hers, slow and insistent. A lush, decadent pleasure unfolded within them, snaking through their veins as though it had lain coiled in anticipation for years.

Just waiting for this moment.

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a/n – really hope you enjoy it and thank you soooo much for reading ;)

[laufire]

sometimes I wish I shared some of my friends and mutuals’ enthusiasm for Eileen's character, but I remain first and foremost frustrated.

the actress is lovely and clearly put in the work (unlike a few others, especially by season 15...), but I found the character criminally underused and underdeveloped. and this isn’t just about the number of episodes she’s in. SPN is remarkably good at capturing the audience’s attention with characters with little to no air time when put against the show as a whole. so the issue is one of quality and not quantity, IMO.

the first time I stood in attention was precisely in 15x09, when Chuck’s influence on her return and her relationship with Sam was revealed and she needed to deal with that. except, of course, she was immediately removed from the plot and any development afterwards happened fucking offscreen (she and Sam going on a date out of nowhere without us seeing how they processed such an important development, dying and resurrecting??). so as things are in canon, as I said, her character frustrates me more than anything else because she’s yet one more instance of you could have been so so so much greater!!!

(sidenote but. yes it should have focused just a bit on Eileen -hell, it should have focused on Sam’s feelings about having this part of his life manipulated again! like it’s so similar to what Hell did with Jess!! and he’s your fucking lead character?!? I can understand the argument that Eileen was not their priority and there’s ultimately nothing wrong with using secondary characters only to prop your mains, but c’mon-. but also, imagine how much more impactful it'd been if Mary, someone with a comparable story, had been alive? sidenote 2 but this is making me think about Eileen/Mary. I’m going to need a moment)

(sidenote 3: my indifference to Saileen definitely plays a part here. I joked once that I didn’t expect to ship them because it looked like Dean approved of the relationship, and how much I care about a Sam ship is inversely proportional to how much Dean likes it. not kidding there, it’s a gr10 metric for how good for Sam’s narrative a dynamic is. Saileen is remarkably inoffensive, and I haven’t rooted for inoffensive in my entire life LOL. plus lbr, I really don’t care for the uberdomestic and conventional version the fandom peddles. more to the point, like with Eileen herself, just the moment a plot point got me truly interested in them... the show tossed the dynamic aside. meh)

otoh, I AM looking forward to write her in fic -even characters (and dynamics) that I’ve been on the fence/merely liked before in canon have made themselves a place in my heart once I sat down, thought about them and how they work in depth, and wrote them. I have a few ideas -I still want to write a Wayward Sisters series of what I would like the “show” to have been, and one of my goals is basically bringing in every female character I like that the writers unceremoneously discarded/killed off lmao. Eileen definitely counts. and I still fantasize about doing that s5-15 rewrite saga lmfao (starting with Ruby being resurrected to play the open antagonist she would’ve excelled at, and getting only more self-indulgent from there!).

[thequibblah]

hi this is the same anon who asked about lily clubbing in manchester and talking about james - directors commentary for that scene pls!

send me a ⭐ for director’s commentary!

spoilers for ch 45 below

omg an all-time fave scene !!! this was one i'd had on the backburner for ages and almost wished had taken place in the summer between 6th/7th year but 1. they weren't in cokeworth and 2. drunken realisation of feelings was something i wanted to occur at hogwarts anyway.

in the end i was happy with the two-part chapter split, though, because i very much wanted to have lily and mary — our two muggle-born chars — be the sun and moon, sort of, in each half, and have their storylines parallel each other. they're both in a state of emotional turmoil but in very different ways; lily is thinking about a boy but doesn't him out, while mary is not thinking about a boy and seeks out more than one; mary is less adept at practical magic and represents a more muggle perspective on muggle-born life while lily leans the other way, but mary's the one in diagon alley and lily's the one in the muggle world. it's also an inversion of the summer holidays, when mary was away and had a few realisations with the help of an unlikely new friend, and lily was in the city and had friction with her mates (chiefly james).

anyway, so, the manchester punk scene has already seeped into the fic a little bit thanks to so it goes and lily and mary broadening their music tastes, which i mentioned earlier is also supposed to be like, the optimism of the 60s-holdover music fading out for something darker and less polished and more cynical and more critical of the establishment as the gang is growing older. but i also didn't want to make it seem like stepping into the world and realising its issues comes at the cost of joy or pleasure (and it certainly didn't for enjoyers of late 70s/early 80s music), so the club felt like a natural way of melding the two

and on a character level, i wanted to cut lily a break from the big political issues of 39/40/41 and let her just. deal with teenage stuff for a second, like whether to take the questionable pill at the club or not, and a spat with her sister. the euphoria elixir was absolutely planned for this moment (though, recall that she didn't down her entire supply, wink wink) as well, though once i started writing it i was like wow she rly is feeling herself and almost ALMOST ALMOST considered letting her apparate off in search of james

and then i didn't

feel free to boo me

anyway, the safety of the environment where no one knows her and the combination of drinks and the elixir felt like a good opportunity to really take stock of the depth of lily's feelings — not that she herself really remembers much of her thought process, but the reader gets the idea, and we continue to build up the uh-oh sensation of she's in deeper than she realises. (and i think i wrote "anyone here could fall in love with him" before the rest of the scene hehe)

wow i feel like that was a lot of pretentious stuff about a scene that is essentially "teehee teenage crush" KJHFKGHDFJKG but anyway yes the vibes were so fun to try and capture and i did watch some footage from pips with really bizarre dance moves!!

[chuuyagum]

Here's a writing process question - you have been writing WGYTR with regular updates for like 3 months now and you said you had the overall plot planned out beforehand, so what I'm wondering is how long did it take to make the outline for the whole fic/basically how much prep work did you do before posting the first chapter. Did it take a long time to decide on everything that will happen? Not just WGYTR, the other fics too, and are there some fics that are easier to plan out and then some that are harder because the plot doesn't come as easily? Thank you so much for your wonderful fics and good luck with whatever personal things you have going on🤗💓

thanks so much for this question!! to be honest, i do very little prep before posting my first chapter! clearly this is all in relation to writing multi-chapter fics, as i haven't tried my hand at one shots lately. in that situation i think my process would be different, so keep that in mind!

i like to let my first chapter dictate the tone for the fic, so i tend to start writing it as if it's a one-shot then make sure i end it in a way that gives me room to keep writing. then my second chapter is where i do my real plotting and create my solid outline for the overall fic so the process tends to go like this;

[the explanation below does have mild spoilers for WGYTR however it's nothing specific, only vague plot elements]

come up with an idea - can be very specific or just a vague concept

ex: "Mecha Senku and the magic of lying" just came about because i saw several fics where Gen is Senku's robot and i wanted to try the inverse

decide on tone - will it be fluff, angst, ect?

write the first chapter! i just type this out quickly and with little care for details, its a rough draft so it's just meant as a mental starting point. overall i spend maybe 1 hour total on this draft - i type furiously and just let whatever comes out flow onto the page

outline! now that i have an idea of where i want to go, i can lay out my plot points. but first i jot down overall vibes in no particular order - it can be specific lines of dialog i want to use, specific scenarios or events.

ex: WGYTR - the title itself, "Who gave you the right?" i wanted this one line to define the character interactions. ultimately it's Senku who says the line, but in my outline it was originally Gen! but when i got to the chapter it made more sense for Senku to say it. this fic is all about the characters opening up to one another and allowing themselves to be seen as they are. so, in a sense, Gen was only able to fall in love with Senku because Senku allowed himself to be seen for his true self. and the same applies to Gen. Senku only fell in love with him for the same reason, Gen allowing himself to be seen in turn

plot! this is the easiest part for me in terms of outline, but my explanation may seem kinda daunting. first i lay out a general order of events. this is easier when the fic is canon compliant like WGYTR, but much harder when it's an AU like Mecha Senku. with events i always like to consider what actions logically lead into one another.

ex: WGYTR was quick for me to plot events since it's canon compliant. i chose where in canon it would start, and where it would end, then filled in the rest.

my overall outline looked like this;

- Gen joins the KoS

- Gen plots how to manipulate Senku for everyones benefit

- Senku largely tries to ignore Gen, too focused on his work

- it's still storm season, they get trapped indoors, forcing them to spend time together

- Gen makes a game to play (hadn't decided what game)

- Senku starts to relax as they spend more time together

- Gen develops a crush on Kohaku at the same time he develops a crush on Senku. deliberately squashes the feelings for Senku down

- Winter prep aspects

- Senku accepts Gen as a friend

- Gen accepts his feelings for Senku

- Senku faces his trauma

- Senku accepts his feelings for Gen

- Christmas

- Observatory & Gen's confession

- Finish the phone, fake Lilian

- Chrome is captured & the car

- Stone Wars

- ends just after Stone Wars

start writing chapter 2! now that i have a general idea of where i'm going, i go ahead and write my second chapter. here is where i make any necessary corrections to the direction of events to better fit my general outline

go back and edit chapter 1! nows the time to fix any problems in consistency, tone, direction, ect!

after i have my general points and have started writing, i break it down even further! this is where i start looking for symbols i can use to further my plot, and do research on more specific topics i plan to touch on

ex: WGYTR takes place largely within a huge time skip in canon. they literally jump from late Summer directly to Christmas of all things. so i thought about everything they had to do to get from Summer > Winter. they do show us some of what they did in between in canon, but they really gloss over it quickly, so for my fic i buckled down on the winter prep aspects that took the entire Fall to get done. from there, i broke it down further. if you look at each invention, it follows a process.

- Gen remembers paper is a thing

- Senku sets him up for the process

- the process brings Gen closer to some of the villagers (Ruby, Garnet, Sapphire)

- Gen starts fooling around with the paper and makes pinwheels for the children

- this action signifies to Senku how kind Gen genuinely is

- Gen makes a log book for Senku and a notebook for himself

- Gen uses his notebook to help Ruri and later to do the math for calculating Senku's birthday

if you follow that process linearly, you can link it to three upcoming canon events related to the paper making which tie it all together. since this chain of events begins with Gen, it'll end with Senku. can you guess what he's going to do with the paper next to wrap up this up? ;)

continue writing! i always have one buffer chapter, so i'll have chapter 11 written before i edit and post chapter 10.

now to answer some of your other questions;

did this take long? not really! this whole process, minus the last two steps....takes me maybe 1 day to 1 week total. WGYTR took me 2 days. by day 3 i had my first two chapters ready and the first one was posted! but those last two steps? i do those as i go along! which probably sounds insane now that i think about it lmao

as for fics that are harder to plan - any type of modern AU is much harder for me! im not sure why, but i struggle with it a lot. my soulmark AU, although i haven't felt inspired to write for it lately, was easy for me to plot out since it fits within the larger canon events. so was my short TsukaSenGen AU. but for a modern AU to make sense, there's a lot of elements to consider that aren't provided by canon, like professions and events and existing dialog, which is why i haven't worked on Mecha Senku in months rip

thanks again for your questions, anon! i hope i did well answering them all!! ♡

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

7, 8, 9 and 14 for the fic asks! Also, I absolutely love your writing and I wish you the best!

Awww thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoy it! 😊

7. Something you hate to see in dialogue.

I don't know that there's anything I particularly hate. Or, nothing has jumped out at me where I'm like "OH GOD HOW COULD THEY"

I suppose, there are times when there hasn't been enough tag-ins of who is speaking so I have to go back to the top and reread the section. But that's more a style thing.

Oh, dialects/modes of speech when written by someone who clearly isn't from that culture/place/peoples and hasn't done the research and so on to do it effectively (e.g. non-southerners trying to mimic southern speech patters and a) assuming the entire south of the US is a single unit that sounds the same and b) not managing to capture the texture of the way people speak). It's mostly that it just throws me off and takes me out of the scene.

8. Something you love to see in dialogue.

A good witty repartee is always enjoyable. I enjoy when action is conveyed through speech, example:

Right. I can’t believe I once thought you clever and worthy of my attention. More fool me, for trusting a thing like you. More fool Théoden, too. No. Don’t sit there. Did I say you could sit? No, I didn’t.

or

'Gods, you're a real louse sometimes, you know that right?'

'Thank you, Downey, you've told me this before.'

'Well, I felt the need to re-inform you of the matter. Now, please move your books, thank you, they were occupying my spot at the table. Don't make that face, DB, it's unattractive.'

That sort of thing. It's very fluid and can be used to capture a more hectic scene without breaking for "and then Vetinari did X" or "and Grima went over here" or what have you.

9. What's your fandom's most overused trope?

(I'm going to speak cross-fandom in this answer because what is over-used shows up in a few of them.)

I'm not a big coffee-shop/high school/university AU sort of person. But I think it's honestly less to do with the settings and more to do with how people are written in those AUs which is usually saccharinely sweet and that drives me a little nuts.

I also find that fandom overdoes the thing with gay couples where one man is, even if it's at a subconscious level, the "woman" and the other is the "man". This leads into that saccharine sweetness that annoys me, it also tends to mean there's a lot of OOC-ness happening. I've found it's a big thing with characters like Krennic, Vetinari, Bilbo, Beckett etc. where they are written in a way that is very out of character but the manner they are written in allows them to be slotted into the "woman" role in comparison to their partner (Tarkin, Vimes, Thorin, Mercer etc.)

Some of this comes from the fact that a lot of writers in fandom struggle to write characters that subvert and transgress certain expectations of gender roles in a way that isn't "they're now a woman." Which is a very layered, complex thing.

And like, I'm sure this is something I've fallen into accidentally myself, but it is a sort-of trope(?) that bugs me and is super common.

14. What aspect of writing have you had the most growth in?

all of it! I would say. I think my writing on the whole has grown tremendously in the past few years. Especially the past three to five, I think.

One of the biggest things that helped me grow, aside from the usual advice of: read, read, read (and read real books! Read widely! Read everything!) was attending writer's workshops.

I'm a writer of non-fanfic things (poetry, short stories, novels [though, those are in the works/being shopped around]) and going to workshops has done amazing things. Almost everything is online now, and there are workshops that are absolutely in the affordable range.

I've also been very fortunate to have a writing mentor for a time who was (and is) a phenomenal poet. One of the most talented writers I know. She, unfortunately, has gone out east to start a cult as pandemic isolation coupled with unresolved trauma that had been resurrected resulted in her going a little Off the Deep End (I have a lot of complex feelings about what happened with her). But prior to that, she was great to work with and helped me a lot.

Also, of course, I've taken a lot of classes and each one has taught me so much (Catapult offers some good online courses. They do cost money, but it's worth it if you can afford it. I think they also have scholarship/financial support options).

Writing poetry is really the thing I can point to that helped me the most with my prose. Night and day. And I suspect the inverse works as well (prose writing helping poets). Learning how form and words and style functions in an art-form that's different teaches you new things to do with your preferred writing method.

But yeah - I think everything has improved. Pacing, plot, description, dialogue etc. I don't think one thing in particular has improved at a greater rate than the others. It's all there.

-

Oh man that last one became a short essay! My apologies!

But thank you so much for the ask and the very kind message 💜😊

fanfic ask meme

[sidgenoabofest]

Remember, you can write for as many or as few prompts as you’d like! And check out the updated FAQ and Timeline pages or send us an Ask if your have any questions. Happy writing! 

1. Mpreg

2. Courting

3. Omega/Omega

4. Jealous mate

5. Lactation kink

6. Mermaid a/b/o au

7. Mail order bride!!!

8. Subversion/Inversion

9. Non-traditional dynamics

10. Very elaborative courting

11. oral knotting + cock warming

12. Geno’s first heat in America.

13. Little Drummer Girl au but a/b/o

14. alpha/alpha first time taking a knot

15. a xeno take on heat and abo dynamics

16. Geno falling for Ace!Sid in an a/b/o au

17. Mutual pining where they’re both Alpha’s

18. Hockey player Alpha Geno, non hockey Sid

19. Alpha!Geno’s dick is too big when he knots

20. Geno and Anna (alphas) try to woo Sid (omega)

21. Regency AU arranged marriage with shy omega Sid

22. Rival teammates and one goes into heat mid game

23. a/b/o dynamics based on lions, rather than wolves

24. beta/omega; first time going through heat together

25. Alpha-Alpha dynamic going into rut on the team plane

26. cockwarming as self-care and/or somebody's love language

27. Sometimes Sid will let Geno fuck his thighs and let him knot.

28. Alien Alpha Sid captures Earthling Omega Geno in his tractor beam

29. Snowed in and/or cabin fic where one of them goes into heat or rut

30. Mafia boss Geno, with husband omega Sid, who is still a boss in his own right

31. Sid's knot takes forever to go down. They work around it with cosy movie nights.

32. Alpha Sid being all worked up over pregnant geno.... and perhaps overly protective…

33. Sid being scent blind and falling in love with Geno the long way, while Geno pines and pines

34. Sid goes into a full on mating heat at the West Point hill climb, Geno fights off all comers.

35. Geno is intersex, with physical characteristics of both alpha and omega. Sid's into all of him.

36. Evgeni always goes to Sidney post heat (or rut). It’s one of many things they don’t talk about.

37. During a goal celebration, Sid and Geno experience a spontaneous bond. It freaks all involved out.

38. Alpha/Alpha rival knight au or Alpha knight and Omega squire? Just something with romance and armour.

39. Tired of being teased and the punchlines of locker room jokes, Sid asked Geno to take his virginity/knot him.

40. Geno and Sid as two alphas who pine for each other and try to pretend they don’t want each other, but they do.

41. sid has a kink for fucking new brides, so omega geno dresses up in bridal lingerie and begs sid to knock him up

42. Alphas and omegas will fuck betas, but they don’t end up staying with them. This is what Sidney knows from experience.

43. Medieval abo au, Sid's castle is small and he and Geno have to consummate their marriage in front of all of Sid's patrons

44. omega/omega pregnancy kink, no getting pregnant angst, just skip right to the good stuff: already pregnant and horny about it.

45. rookie sid and geno are still a bit too young for a real heat, so they put in some practice together and things get out of hand

46. “i’m rich and i’m not supposed to talk to servants but the person that scrubs my floor is really cute” (/smells fucking amazing)

47. New relationship during the holidays and somebody forgot to take their suppressant and goes into rut in between dinner and dessert

48. Omega Sid and alpha Geno hook up, it's a one night stand. Sid notices he's pregnant a couple weeks after and goes to hunt down Geno

49. Baby NHL omegas come to Sid for advice on omegas working with alphas, dating etiquette with alphas and what its like to get knotted by an alpha.

50. Alpha Geno courting Omega Sid to be allowed to mate him, over expensive gifts to dinner invitations to being possessive and protective on the ice

51. Sid can’t stand being touched or scent marked by strangers, but Geno’s never been that to him. (Authors choice re: what designations they each have)

52. Regency AU: Mr Sidney Crosby is as well know for his big estate and he wealth as he is for being an omega who tops all the alpha gentlemen he take to his bed

53. Sid is always yapping on the bench, but in relationships his communication skills go right down the drain when he has a cold and can't rely on scent cues for help.

54. you rescued me from the creepy person that was hitting on me in the bar and i’m glad you did because MMHMMM you are hot and smell like nothing i’ve ever smelled before

55. Sid is a beta who Geno always calls on when he goes into heat/rut. It’s fun and no strings attached and they’re friends. Only Geno slowly realises he wants more than that

56. one is an omega and the other is a beta (the inherent convenience of a self-slicking butthole; the beta figuring out how to satisfy their partner in heat, who can go for HOURS)

57. Only werewolves are a/b/o’s, humans are just humans. As a general rule human!Sid stays out of wolf business but Evgeni keeps making it his business by acting like Sidney’s *his.*

58. sid being teased relentlessly for his big alpha dick in the locker room, and loving it, kinda strutting around naked but also going all pink, and geno really LOOKING for the first time

59. Sid has been on high level suppressants since juniors and nobody knows if he's hiding being an alpha or an omega. Geno has been curious for YEARS but never asked, till something happens.

60. One of their alpha/omega statuses doesn't kick in until after retirement-- they spent a good portion of life thinking they were a beta but now that shit is going BANANAS. Puberty at age 40

61. Sid/Geno/Anna where Sid + Geno are both Omegas and have banded together like "we don't need any alpha nonsense" but then Geno meets Alpha Anna at the Olympics and shit gets real, real fast.

62. Tradition has it, your mate is supposed to smell best to you. But Sid usually smells like old milk. How the fuck is Geno supposed to work around that? Because Sid is definitely the one he wants.

63. Alpha Sid's enthralled with Geno's omega trills. Geno's kind of a picky eater (like he's picky about everything) Sid revels in the challenge of finding snacks and gifts that will make Geno trill

64. geno's heats come on fast and with no warning, sometimes in the middle of a game, so once in a while sid can help a buddy out and slip geno some fingers to just get him through to the intermission

65. Established Sid and Geno who have not bonded for some reason (is one beta? are they waiting for something?), with a side of whoops, accidentally bonded to someone else in a heat-related medical emergency.

66. You’re an actor/other famous person that I really admire and I just saw you in the street and as I was debating whether or not to say hi you came up to me and started flirting what do I do?? (but make it hockey abo)

67. Sexual dysfunction: Maybe an alpha who's having trouble knotting, or a bata having a hard time staying hard his fist time dating an omega, or an omaga who's having issues self lubricating. Emotional comfort through sex!

68. Camboy or porn AU where the one who does sex work specializes in alpha/alpha or omega/omega porn. Ideally the one watching is still an NHL player and has some complicated feelings around their own same-gender preferences.

69. one is an alpha and the other is a beta (first time getting knotted and being overwhelmed by it plus like LOTS of lube; or the alpha likes getting fucked but doesn't like to be knotted so a beta partner is the perfect option)

70. omega/omega sid figuring out how to top geno's giant peach ass when omegas aren't particularly well-endowed (dick-extending knotting dildo? practicing flexibility? finger-shaped bruises trying to keep those cheeks pried open?)

71. Green card heat bond au! The KHL don’t want to release Geno from his contract to let him play in the NHL. It’s becoming messy and it looks like the Penguins may lose their legal case when someone suggests a heat bond green card.

72. Trophy wife Geno: He likes to be pampered, he like his valour track suits, he likes lounging around in fur coats, and he likes getting knotted when Sid comes back from a win...and maybe even more when he comes back from a loss…

73. Heatfic PWP set during Geno’s rookie year when he barely speaks any English. Up to you which one is in heat—I just like the idea of Sid and Geno trying awkwardly to communicate & then not really needing to once instinct takes over.

74. Beauty and the beats/ or some kind of monster au. Geno is saved by Beast!Sid and nursed back to health in his castle. By the end Geno is as in love with the monster as he is with Sid's other self. This could be any dynamic combination.

75. Sid’s concussion messing up his alpha or omega cycle, or maybe delaying him from differentiating. Everyone calls him a late bloomer, which Sid doesn’t care about except when he sometimes sees Geno post heat/rut and feels confusing stuff

76. ABO specific sex toys: training knots for omega's, dilators for alphas and betas who want to sleep with other alphas, knotting flashlights, double headed dildos for omega/omega pairs? The list goes on! The only limit is your imagination.

77. Geno - omega who's never gone into heat. Maybe he never will. Despite the pessimism of his younger years, this has turned out to fine, because he and Sid have an excellent and well-established sex life regardless, and SID's heats are pretty great for both of them.

78. Nontraditional abo dynamic frat au: Either with alphas, betas, and omegas all in the same house or maybe separate different fraternities? It could be two competing alpha's from different frat houses? or maybe a beta at an omega house party feeling *very overwhelmed*

79. Geno breaks up after bonding with someone. It’s sudden and it happens mid-season and he can’t go home to lick his wounds so instead his bond-withdrawal becomes a team issue. The trainers and medics all have opinions and advice, but it’s Sid who gets him through the worst of it.

80. Omega Sid is wedded to foreign Prince Alpha Geno because male Omegas are rare and a 'sign to God'. The marriage is a sign of goodwill from the people of Sid's kingdom, he's a low noble but his Omega status makes him more worthy. They meet for the first time in front of the altar

81. Omega Sid is ‘President’ of the NHL omega groupchat/association, Sid and Seguin have a friendship forged through both declaring they “dont need no Alpha!” But cant stop having ‘issues’ with their closest Alpha on their teams. Sid-Seguin gossipy omega friendship as they explore life getting closer to alphas (Geno, Benn)

82. Beta Sid's the king of locker room talk and all the rowdy shenanigans that go on there. He flirts with everyone shamelessly and Geno has no idea how he's supposed to tell if Sid's being serious or not when he tells Geno to "take a picture, it will last longer" or something to that degree. (He really wants Sid to be serious).

83. Age difference Coach Sid/ Rookie Geno au. Geno needs to get bonded to be allowed to travel overseas and play for the Penguins. Sid agrees to be his alpha without really thinking about it until Geno shows up wide-eyed and perky at his front door and things just derail from there. (and by derail I mean office sex at the arena.)

84. Sid is an Omega but pretends to be a suppressed alpha as omegas are considered special and rare, almost local celebrities unto themselves, plus most wouldnt want to see an Omega risking injury playing professional sport. The presence of an ideal Alpha in Geno is making it harder and harder to hide his omega side and instincts.

85. After the NHL All Star Game, alpha Sid ends up with omega Geno’s gear bag. Sid doesn’t realize the mix-up until he gets home. When he opens the bag, he instantly recognizes the smell of omega arousal, and a couple of things become clear: Geno was getting hot while playing in the ASG, and Sid has unfettered, private access to Geno’s scent.

86. Pirates of the Caribbean/Black Sails au—Zhenya is a wealthy young omega hostage on pirate Sid's ship. In the end Sid can’t follow through and hand Zhenya over to the people who want him in exchange for gold. (or maybe Zhenya offers knowledge of something better for them to steal in order to save himself and they fall in love during the adventure)

87. Someone tried to take advantage of Sid while in heat/rut; it’s something that Geno hears whispers of when he is a rookie, but no one talks about it and Geno doesn’t have a nearly good enough grasp on English to try. He just stays later to practice with Sid and sits next to him at clubs and uses his body to block people when they try to touch Sid.

88. After years of dancing around their feelings, AlphaGeno and OmegaSid start ‘hooking up’ and then accidentally bond in The Playoffs bubble. This is a problem because newly bonded omegas tend to become bratty and act out in many ways and try to test their alpha, sometimes taunting other alphas to see if their own alpha will come defend them. Chaos on and off the ice ensues.

89. Werewolf/abo au: an unsuspecting Geno (omega or beta) comes across Alpha Sid's pack (maybe on a full moon run or Sid helps him with car troubles in a snow storm or maybe Geno visits Sid's pack after moving to the area as a gesture of good will.) Either way, Sid knows as soon as he sees Geno that he wants him for his bond mate, and will do whatever it takes to get him to agree.

90. Geno scent marking Sid; maybe they’re not bonded or in a relationship but Sid is *his*; his captain, his friend, the person who laughs at Geno’s jokes and exchanges knowing looks with Geno whenever one of their teammates does something dumb. It’s possessive and technically rude, but whatever. Sid likes it, Geno argues when someone (Flower, probably) tries to call him out for it.

91. Rookie Geno is ultra-competitive about everything from who goes last out of the locker room to how many eggs he can eat in a minute. Everyone sees it as Geno locking horns with Sid, competing as young alphas do. Only, Sid doesn’t seem offended or annoyed. If anything, he seems delighted and more than a little turned on. (Bonus points if everybody is wrong about one of them being an alpha).

92. Alpha sid being possessive and jealous over oblivious omega geno and maybe getting into a fight (throw in some alpha ovi shipping these idiots but also teasing sid about his and geno’s past hookups because he might be onboard the Sid geno train but he’s also a sassy bitch about it) bonus if it also has backy/ovi (if we squint not here to take the spotlight away from the two headed monster)

93. Mail Order Alpha AU: To Play in the KHL Omega Geno needs to be bonded. Metallurge team management offers him many options for Russian suitors, but Geno being Geno doesn’t like being told what to do. Instead of accepting any of those, he finds himself a nice Canadian alpha on "mail order bride" message boards. Bonus points for slightly awkward but also hot “bonding night scene” and Sid charming Geno's family with his broken Russian.

94. Sid never joins in with any of the rowdy locker room talk about hook ups/sex/knots/heats/ruts. Some of the guys joke it’s because Sid’s a virgin or frigid. Geno knows that isn’t true, because they hooked up one time when they were rookies. In retrospect he thinks it was probably Sid’s first time, and he knows he messed it up because instead of talking to Sid and seeing if they had anything real, Geno got back together with Oksana. It’s been years since then, and he and Sid are friends, but sometimes Geno wonder’s ‘what if...’

95. Geno broke an Alpha/Omega bond when he escaped from Russia to come to the NHL. He promised himself he’d never bond with anyone else ever again. He’d just have fun. And he is having fun fucking around. He was never allowed to do that at home. He probably shouldn’t be doing it in the west because he’s getting a reputation but he doesn’t care. He’s free and no one can tell him what to do. It’s his life and his choices and he’s never going to bond with anyone ever again. Only without noticing he finds himself falling for his best friend, Sidney.

96. nesting!! it can be because one of them is pregnant, or something bond/hormone related, or just a pre-heat behavior, but i love fics where the omega partner is secretly stealing the other one's clothes and small personal belongings to make a nice safe nest/den in a closet or spare room or even a trainer's room at the rink. i especially love this trope if the nesting partner is a little embarrassed or evasive about it, lol. my heart says it's sid who's building a nest out of geno's things (and being a little squirrely about it trying to keep it secret) but i think an omega!geno version would also be delightful.

97. Demisexual!Sid in an a/b/o world where designation/romance/sex has never been a big deal to him. He’s never understood his teammates stories of losing their minds with heat lust, or falling in love at first scent or losing days in bed with someone riding out their heat/rut or anything like that. Most people tell him, he’ll understand one day when the right alpha/omega/beta comes along or question if something is wrong with his designation/him. Geno never does. For the longest time Geno is one of the few friends who doesn’t think anything is wrong with him. But the problem with friends is sometimes Sid falls for them.

98. I'd love to read an a/b/o fic involving an unplanned pregnancy. Maybe they're in some kind of casual fwb arrangement off and on for years, or maybe they just hooked up the one time and had tacitly agreed to never speak of it again. I'd read pretty much any take on this prompt -- an Obvious Child-esque version where they decide to have an abortion but also realize they have feelings for each other; a version where they decide to have a baby but both think the other just wants to be friends and co-parents (not romantically involved); a version where the pregnancy forces them to reckon with their true feelings for each other... really, anything goes!

99. Loser's sacrifice / victor's prize fic, version 1: Geno wasn't drafted by the Pens, and he and Sid have spent their whole careers as rival captains (you can decide if it's a no-love-lost rivalry or just mutual respect for each other or a hatesex chemistry type dynamic). The Pens lose to Sid's team, and Sid offers himself to Geno as the victor's prize. (I'd read any version of this, but I'd especially love an alpha!Geno / omega!Sid fic where Sid's the only omega captain in a predominantly alpha league -- and this creates some weird tensions, because the sacrifice is supposed to be about the humiliation of an alpha having to submit to another alpha. Maybe Sid doesn't usually accept or offer sacrifice (someone else on the team does it for him).

100. Loser's sacrifice / victor's prize fic, version 2: Sid and Geno are together (you can decide how serious it is). After a bad loss one night, Sid offers himself as the sacrifice to the opposing team (or maybe just to their captain). Geno is insanely jealous and territorial about it and pretends to be sulky/angry, but in the days after he can't stop furtively jacking off thinking about it. Sid figures it out eventually, and somehow it becomes a thing for them. Sid starts regularly offering himself as sacrifice but always comes to Geno immediately afterwards, smelling of the opposing captain/team, so Geno can fuck someone else's come out of him while Sid tells him everything the team did to him.

101. I've been thinking about an a/o universe where non-alpha/omega pairings are still socially stigmatized, but there's an active scent-masking party/club scene, where people take blockers and go to hook up with other people without knowing what their dynamic is. Maybe the clubs themselves are a little taboo -- sort of like gay bathhouses in the '70s or private BDSM clubs -- so it's mostly people who are in the know, and there's a general understanding that you don't acknowledge people you meet there if you encounter them out in the world. I'd love an alpha/alpha fic set in this verse - could be a non-hockey AU where Sid and Geno meet at one of these clubs, or a canon fic where they don't realize the other is into alphas until they're out of town on a road trip and they run into each other at one of these clubs.

102. There are no omegas in the NHL—at least as far as anyone knows. Sid’s been taking illegal scent-blockers/suppressants and passing as a beta since he presented as an omega as a teen. The only people who know the truth are his parents, his agent, and Jack Johnson (who helped make excuses for Sid at SSM during his first heat). Sid doesn’t intend to reveal his secondary gender until his retirement—once he’s won a Cup or three and gold for Canada and proven decisively that omegas can play at the highest levels. Except something happens (his supply of blockers is interrupted, or he has a breakthrough heat, or something) and Geno finds out. I’d especially love it if this was early in their NHL careers, before they knew/trusted each other and were able to communicate well, but I’d definitely also read a fic where Geno finds out many years into their friendship, and has to grapple with how much Sid’s hidden from him.

103. old timey pirate AU! sid’s a naval officer who’s clawed his way up the ranks despite significant prejudice against omegas. he’s achieved his dream of captaining a ship, but his life is a lonely one, in part because he can’t let himself be vulnerable with anyone (in case they use it against him to challenge his leadership). the only bright spot in his life is the years-long cat-and-mouse game he’s been playing with evgeni malkin, a notorious russian pirate captain who‘s managed to evade arrest for years, often by tricking the navy or managing to cleverly conceal his crew’s stolen loot when their ship is boarded by the Navy. Geno’s an alpha, but unlike Sid’s fellow officers, he’s always treated Sid with the utmost respect—even if he also gleefully delights in tricking Sid’s men and repeatedly evading capture. in fact, after years of meeting in various port towns and at sea, Geno seems to consider Sid a friend. (Sid knows Geno finds him attractive, too, and has made it clear—always teasingly, never in a pushy or aggressive way—that he’s available, should Sid ever want to go to bed with an alpha.) up to you what the plot is, but I’d love something where Geno’s luck finally runs out, and Sid’s the one who‘s tasked with bringing him back to shore to be tried (and most likely hanged) for piracy. make Sid choose between his honor + love of rules and his unacknowledged feelings for geno!!

[karliahs]

‘I always come back here,” he says, more because he can’t keep the anger inside anymore than because he really wants to confide in Aizawa. “No matter how long it's been. Even when I do all the right things. I never get free."

Aizawa’s expression is mostly just tired; a knowing kind of tired. Izuku thinks maybe no one ever gets free of anything, that maybe life is just a collection of snowballing consequences that eventually slow you all the way to a stop. If he could pick one person to get some freedom, to get some ease, it would be Aizawa.

"Were you here last week?” Aizawa asks, in his quiet, patient voice. “Were you here in that garden?"

Izuku is crying, because of course he is. All he does is cry and yet he's never cried out. He's never gotten rid of it. He shakes his head.

"I know...I know it's not enough,” Aizawa says. “Maybe you always come back, but the time in between still counts. You get free over and over, just not forever." It’s rare to hear Aizawa raise his voice, outside of trying to be heard over the chatter of twenty kids, but this quiet feels different. Like he doesn’t have anything more to give either. "I'd give you forever, if I could."

Izuku looks into Aizawa's eyes and knows that he means it, knows that one other person gets how unfair it is that you can never really save someone all the way. The experience lives inside of them, and it can survive so much time and so much safety. It makes him think differently about all the villain fights he’s ever watched, all the videos of All Might carrying people to safety - did the people resting on his strong shoulders ever forget? Did they wake up shivering because the ground had fallen apart, the fucking ground beneath their feet, and if that can happen once then you’re never, never safe.

“It’s not fair,” he says, something weak and childish pervading his voice.

Aizawa nods. He doesn’t need to do anything else. The fact that he knows this well, knows this better than Izuku ever has, is written across his whole face, his whole life.

“It’s not fair ,” Izuku repeats, voice breaking, collapsing down and resting his forehead on his teacher’s shoulder. An arm winds its way around his shoulders. Izuku shakes and cries and waits - waits for it to be better, waits for the part of him that knows how to pick himself back up from things like this to come back. Waits for the ground to break again, always.’

from redux, part 5 of rescue

...later even than i said it would be, but here you go! thank you for asking and giving me the chance to ramble!!

‘I always come back here,” he says, more because he can’t keep the anger inside anymore than because he really wants to confide in Aizawa. “No matter how long it's been. Even when I do all the right things. I never get free."

i'm glad you chose this part! i was a little nervous about it since it's maybe the furthest i've taken izuku from his canon characterisation, but ultimately realistic trauma responses + exploring the themes i wanted to explore won over sticking to canon. kid's been through a lot

i'm always interested in how emotion can distort time, and how every breakdown can seem to pull you right back into every other breakdown you've had. in the headspace where negative conclusions are always the largest & most important thing, remembering having felt this way before doesn't equal 'i survived it then, i can survive it now' so much as 'i'm going nowhere, i should have never gotten off the floor the first time, all the trying i do in between is pointless and an embarrassing waste of time'

recovery is hard enough anyway but i think for someone like izuku, whose journey with one for all has been so much about effort equalling reward, it's so frustrating that ticking off every point on your recovery homework checklist may not actually mean that you...feel better

Aizawa’s expression is mostly just tired; a knowing kind of tired. Izuku thinks maybe no one ever gets free of anything, that maybe life is just a collection of snowballing consequences that eventually slow you all the way to a stop. If he could pick one person to get some freedom, to get some ease, it would be Aizawa.

something i tried to capture in izuku's narration is that he is still just a kid figuring out what the world even is, so having these traumatic experiences is absolutely going to warp that profoundly. darken your door deals with that a lot too, the way that as you grow up you start to see that these untouchable far-off adults are actually also unsure and lost and prone to getting pummelled by the world

but he is also so kind. a lot of this series is aizawa and izuku pushing each other forwards by turns like no YOU get better. and this gets hashed out more further on in the fic, to drive home the idea that part of izuku's despair is a loss of belief in heroism since it can't defeat the lingering consequences of experiencing harm, and part of the 'solution' to that is the counter-evidence provided by all the kindness offered between them in this series, showing that while it isn't as straight-forward as picking someone up and carrying them away from danger, there is so much we can do for each other

"Were you here last week?” Aizawa asks, in his quiet, patient voice. “Were you here in that garden?"

Izuku is crying, because of course he is. All he does is cry and yet he's never cried out. He's never gotten rid of it. He shakes his head.

"I know...I know it's not enough,” Aizawa says. “Maybe you always come back, but the time in between still counts. You get free over and over, just not forever." It’s rare to hear Aizawa raise his voice, outside of trying to be heard over the chatter of twenty kids, but this quiet feels different. Like he doesn’t have anything more to give either. "I'd give you forever, if I could."

i saw izuku crying a lot in the fun anime show and decided to project every feeling i've ever had about this inconvenient involuntary stress response and tbh. i am right

'he's never gotten rid of it' it's a mental illness cliche but i do feel compelled to describe it like you're carrying around something awful and ugly that takes away all your joy and breaks all of the things you wanted to do and be. like that sentence doesn't explicitly specify an object/what 'it' is, but i feel like people got it

here is aizawa's inverse of izuku's if he could pick anyone to get free it'd be aizawa. rare that they manage the 'no, YOU get better' switcheroo card within just a couple of paragraphs

and it's also...if i could pick you up and carry you away from your problems forever, i would. if i could change the way pain works to spare you from it, i would.

Izuku looks into Aizawa's eyes and knows that he means it, knows that one other person gets how unfair it is that you can never really save someone all the way. The experience lives inside of them, and it can survive so much time and so much safety. It makes him think differently about all the villain fights he’s ever watched, all the videos of All Might carrying people to safety - did the people resting on his strong shoulders ever forget? Did they wake up shivering because the ground had fallen apart, the fucking ground beneath their feet, and if that can happen once then you’re never, never safe.

talking a bit about time and pain again...the frustration that a short terrible experience can be followed by months of nothing but rest and gentleness, and yet the short terrible experience is still somehow stronger

a lot of this series is about izuku developing from a more innocent understanding of suffering and heroism, or rather having that innocence forcibly taken away and having to deal with what that means for his goals and his future...i also wanted to see if it could be more powerful ultimately to not show a great deal of what happened with shigaraki, but make it possible to kind of read it in reverse in the impact it's had on izuku. shigaraki wanted to break izuku's belief in all might and the heroism he represented, and he certainly succeeded in fracturing it

i distinctly remember as a child hearing that one of the worst parts about having someone break into your house wasn't the experience itself, but always knowing after that that someone breaking into your house could happen. that being added to the list of possibilities in your head, so that being home was ruined even if it never did happen again

“It’s not fair,” he says, something weak and childish pervading his voice.

Aizawa nods. He doesn’t need to do anything else. The fact that he knows this well, knows this better than Izuku ever has, is written across his whole face, his whole life.

“It’s not fair ,” Izuku repeats, voice breaking, collapsing down and resting his forehead on his teacher’s shoulder. An arm winds its way around his shoulders. Izuku shakes and cries and waits - waits for it to be better, waits for the part of him that knows how to pick himself back up from things like this to come back. Waits for the ground to break again, always.

a lot of recovery is work but a lot of it is just waiting. sometimes when you're in a certain place all you can really do is hold on until your resilience or capacity for joy come back. one of the most helpful things i learned was that sometimes when i'm incapable of saying anything nice to myself, to do the equivalent of going 'okay, we'll talk later.' because it always does come back

i love rescue and everyone who reads it, very much

[carnistcervine]

The Gaang Chases Zuko AU

This whole AU was inspired by a fever dream scene from my fic: Thoughts of Reason, Thoughts of Treason. Like I got the idea and I wrote it out, and I was like: "Damn, that'd actually make an interesting AU." Then I experimented with it and in CATLA, and now here we are.

-A bit similar to my Air Nomad Conquest AU, but with many major notable differences~!

-Okay, so basically, the whole attempted genocide of the Air Nomads failed spectacularly. Someone warned them in advance and they used their abilities to restrict the firebenders ability to fight.

-Then, the other three nations teamed up to fight the Fire Nation. The Fire Nation fights a long and bloody battle with the Water Tribes and Earth Kingdom, but the united front slowly wears them down.

-The Fire Nation falls. Under the command of the Air Nomads, they don't hurt or genocide the Fire Nation or firebenders. They "re-educate" them.

-Well as many as they can, the ones who refuse to surrender do end up fighting to the death with Water Tribe warriors and Earth Kingdom soldiers.

-However, the Air Nomads take no lives in the conflict.

-But they actually did have some help from within the Fire Nation, Iroh started a civil war within the Fire Nation when his son died in battle. Finally putting an end to the near century long bloody conflict.

-Of course, Iroh is branded a traitor and Ozai takes the throne when Azulon stands down.

-Ozai wants to ramp up the violence and bloodshed, unwilling to surrender peacefully to the united front. Zuko suggests something else and is burned for his troubles.

-Iroh takes the capital and Ozai flees with Azula, leaving his gravely injured son behind.

-They find the badly hurt Zuko trying to escape.

-He's captured and handed over to his Uncle, who has him treated for his injury.

-Iroh assumes the throne, and as soon as he's well enough, Zuko escapes the Fire Nation.

-For three years Zuko lives on the run, until the Avatar awakens from his century long slumber.

-There are many Ozai sympathetic firebenders out there, and even Ozai himself. It's decreed that they must be captured and sent for "re-education".

-When Katara and Sokka find Aang in the South Pole, he admits to being the Avatar, and the two join him on his journey back to the Air Temples.

-At the Southern Air Temple, Aang admits to being the Avatar who ran away a hundred years ago.

-As punishment for neglecting his Avatar duties for a century, Aang is sent to capture the royal firebending family.

-Aang accepts the mission gracefully, and Sokka and Katara join him in tracking down Azula, Ozai, and Zuko.

-Zuko meets up with Azula who's been seperated from Ozai and for a time they work together.

-Only she underestimates the Gaang(whom have now incorporated Toph) and is captured.

-Zuko manages to flee but only barely.

-Aang insists to Zuko that he's not and doesn't want to hurt him.

-Zuko doesn't believe the monk for a second.

-It's basically like an inverse(I think?) of how it works in the show. The Avatar, and by extension the Gaang, have to chase down the Fire Prince.

I may edit or change some details, but this is pretty much the gist of it. :'D

I really like this AU, I think it's an interesting premise, and I just wanna try to do as much justice as possible.

(Please excuse if there’s any part that doesn’t make sense, I’m tired and my last braincell is working overtime)

(Also if anyone likes this premise or this AU feel free to take a crack at it, or use ideas from it or whatever. More fic is more fic. :D)