#it's crucial to a character's growth and i have no idea how to go about it

[russeliarat]

Help, I’m at doing some chapter planning and I’m up to a part about training someone for flight with the Rito, but I’ve only now realised I have very limited knowledge on birds, flight, and aerodynamics. I’ve always focused my eyes on the sea tbh so I have no idea how birds work

[secondhandsorrows]

Some Vital Scenes to Include in a Romantic Subplot, pt. 1

I’ve been in the plotting stages of a novel I’ve been working on for some time now. It’s not a romance novel, per se, but the romantic aspect is very prevalent… dare I say important. Anyway, so as I was working on my scenes and character arcs, I began to realize that I didn’t have enough fleshed-out about romantic arc, nor deepened the protagonist’s love interest or their connection, for that matter. This led me to devise up some scenes that I felt were crucial to the story if I wanted to keep this romantic angle to it, and now that I’ve most of them arranged, I find now that I’m way more excited about my characters’ love story. 

These tips will be unnumbered because, obviously, the sequence of these events and how they will fall into your storyline will probably be different. Also, you don’t have to use only one scene for every suggestion that will be mentioned, as you can have multiple scenes of flirtations or deep conversations, for example. They usually blend all together into the narrative at this point. Just remember that there should be some relevance to the plot at hand in some of these scenes as to not derail completely from the main narrative or other conflicts.

I was going to post this all at once, but decided it was too long and wanted to split it into two parts to go more in-depth and for easy reading. /-\ Enjoy ~

- The meet-cute, or the meet-ugly:

Ah, yes, the first encounter. Or, as we sometimes like to call it: the meet-cute, or the meet-ugly if you’re feeling a little unconventional or perhaps mischievous. Though we may enjoy setting up our star-crossed characters in a whole range of moments from awkward to swoon-worthy, the initial meeting is what’s important (if your characters haven't already met before the beginning of the story, ofc, but this is useful to have in mind). Let us quickly define the two:

Meet-Cute: A charming and serendipitous first encounter between the characters in question that sets a positive, memorable, and oftentimes romantic tone.

Meet-Ugly: An unconventional, awkward, or disastrous initial meeting that adds a unique twist to the start of the romantic connection, often leading to unexpected chemistry and an added intrigue on whether or not they’ll get together.

You don’t have to nail your characters’ first encounter into a label or bubble such as these two examples, but I like bringing these up for a general idea. 

- Bouts of flirting and/or banter:

Just as the title suggests, these are scenes containing the flirtaious communication between the two characters. These kinds of interactions will, of course, develop over time and deepen the bond or relationship. Playful interactions, gazes, and witty exchanges between the characters can create a lighthearted and flirtatious atmosphere that hints at their growing attraction.

The way they might flirt or tease can reveal their personalities. For example, one character might be more sarcastic, while the other responds with quick wit, or quiet bashfulness. There’s an element of subtlety, as flirting lets the characters express their romantic interest without explicitly stating it (unless one of your characters lacks subtlety in general and prefers to shout their undying love from the rooftops, which would make for an interesting dynamic, but I’m only spit-balling). 

Banter, teasing, and romantic tension underscoring heated debates or loathsome gazes suit just as nicely, especially if you’re writing with enemies-to-lovers or rivalry tropes in mind. But be careful! A little goes a long way: too much all at once can repel any growth for the characters or narrative.

- Initial conflict or struggle:

Depending on your story’s big-picture conflict, the introduction of challenges or obstacles can create tension between the characters, adding depth to their relationship and making their eventual connection all the more satisfying. This might include cultural or class differences, opposing goals or values, history of past heartbreak, personality weaknesses such as stubbornness, or external pressures that threaten to keep the characters apart. Even a nosy family or a disapproving mother can be considered. How the characters navigate and resolve these conflicts contributes significantly to the overall emotional impact of the romance subplot, as well as allowing for some exploration of each character's strengths, weaknesses, and resilience. 

- Shared vulnerability:

This kind of scene involves the characters opening up to each other about their innermost fears, insecurities, past trauma, or personal struggles. Shared vulnerability goes beyond surface-level interactions. It involves characters revealing their authentic selves, exposing their emotional vulnerabilities, and allowing the other person to see them in an honest — and sometimes new — light.

This is a symbolic gesture of commitment we’re talking about, here… something that requires trust. As characters share their fears or past traumas, they are entrusting the other person with sensitive information, fostering a sense of trust and emotional intimacy. It might be scary, it could be out from left field, but they will end up learning something new about themselves, their situation, or about the other person, and thus deepen their connection, little by little.

[snifferish]

When people talk about creating safe spaces online, I think the general focus is on excluding people who are outright nasty or prejudice. While I think this is important and a good step, it can also create some illusion that the people within the space are safe from doing wrong. 

There are so many examples of this for sure, but to give an example that I have experienced is the concept of “Safe spaces for women” Yeah obviously it tends to be a space free of men, but that doesn’t make the women who are in the space completely “safe” either. If we talk about the four I’s of oppression, Ideological, Institutional, Interpersonal, and Internalized, the step of excluding the offending group only addresses a few. Going back to my example, there are plenty of women I’ve met who carry internalized ideas of misogyny who can make other women feel unsafe. I mean, most of, if not all of the misogyny I’ve experienced in the MC community has come from other fem people who use the excuse that they like some women or are a women as a defense.

It’s also important to mention intersectionality. Yeah it’s a space of women, and that might make it seem free of misogyny, but what if those women carry prejudice towards someone's race, or whether or not they are trans?

And again, because it’s been deemed a “safe space” a lot the internal or intersectional offenders see themselves as immune because of their position or other identity. I think if one truly wants to cultivate a safe space online, while excluding the people who are outright nasty and prejudice is a good step, it’s important to encourage the people within the community to look inside themselves and deconstruct their prejudices whether its against other people or yourself (also going back to those four I’s, it’s crucial to understand no one if free from that). It’s important to create a space where criticism is accepted, and not viewed as an attack, and in turn the criticism given is intended to call out and instigate growth. This post itself isn’t an attack on anyone in particular, in fact it’s partially a guideline for myself, as I want to cultivate a safe space in my online community while acknowledging that just because I do that, I’m not free of critique. I also want to add that this happens in a myriad of forms across multiple communities, and I use the example of misogyny because that’s what I’ve experienced, but if others want to weigh in their experiences as well, I think that’s important.  Sorry for the random tumblr post out of the blue, I enjoy a long character count ahaha. I’m not even sure how to tag this and it might just go to the void, but these are my thoughts.

[ineffable-endearments]

I was rethinking the bookshop meta I wrote a while ago and realized I was not thinking big enough.

The bookshop has always been Aziraphale's version of Crowley's plants (his trauma reenactment), but also, absolutely everything Aziraphale does in Season 2 is a re-creation of Heaven's role. Crowley's behavior also encompasses everything, not just his plants.

I've seen it suggested that centering Aziraphale and Crowley's trauma histories is reducing their characters to behaving like just reactive victims instead of survivors with agency. Or worse, it's "excusing bad behavior." I don't agree with either of these, because I feel that part of Good Omens is about how large, powerful systems affect individuals, and so the context of every character's decisions matters a lot to the overall themes of the story. Everyone starts out working within a system they believe to reflect reality and then has to learn how to break free of it. You cannot really illustrate that without having the characters start out being genuinely trapped with different ways of coping with their reality.

This is an attempt at a pretty big-picture meta. Although it isn't a plot prediction, it's how I think some of the series' themes are going to progress. It starts out perhaps a little grim, but in the long run, it's how Aziraphale's character growth and relationship with Crowley can simultaneously be massive for them as individuals, a crucial part of the overarching narrative message of the series, and symbolic of a change in all of Heaven and Hell, all while allowing the themes to continue to prioritize human free will.

In short, it's about Aziraphale's problems, but it's also meant to be an Aziraphale love post.

All of the below exists in tandem with Good Omens as a comedy of errors. Just because there are heavy ideas does not mean they will not also be funny. Look back on how much of Season 2 seemed silly until we started to pick it apart! One of the amazing things about Good Omens is how it manages to do both silly and serious at once! (I feel like that's maybe a little Terry Pratchett DNA showing through. "Laughter can get through the keyhole while seriousness is still hammering on the door," as Terry himself said.)

Aziraphale has really embraced his connection to Crowley in Season 2, and he has also become considerably more assertive toward Heaven and Hell. These are both major growth points compared to the beginning of Season 1.

However, again, we have the concept of growing pains...Aziraphale is starting to re-create Heaven's role in his relationship with Crowley and humanity. It's really obvious with the Gabriel argument and the I Was Wrong Dance, but I think we see it all over the place: he seems to feel any serious dissent is a betrayal. He also seems to assume there's a dominance hierarchy and he, of course, is on top. Now that he's decided to take control of his own future, then surely that does mean he's the one in control, right?

With all that said, he still seems to have trouble being direct about the feelings that make him most vulnerable. He manipulates people and engineers situations in which he can try to get his emotional needs met rather than saying things outright (case in point: the Ball).

Like I pointed out in the bookshop meta: subconsciously, he's playing the role of God, modified with what God would be if She were everything he wants Her to be. He's generous, almost infinitely sweet, always does what's best for people...or, at least, what he believes is best for people. During the Ball, Aziraphale influences the people around him to be comfortable and happy even when they're not supposed to be, and he limits their ability to talk about things he thinks are too rude or improper for happy, formal occasions.

Doesn't this pattern sort of make sense for an angel who's just discovering free will? Like, at the end of Season 1, he made an enormous choice to stand against Heaven and realized he could survive it. Now he's gone a bit overboard with exerting his own will. Unfortunately, while he's learned to question upper management, he's still operating on a fundamental framework of the universe where there have to be two sides and there has to be a hierarchy. Also, since Aziraphale is on the Good side, he of course has to gear his desires into what's Good rather than just what he wants, so he sometimes thinks he's doing things for others when really he's doing things for himself. (For example, matchmaking Maggie and Nina started out as something he wanted to use to lie to Heaven, but by the time he was commenting "Maggie and Nina are counting on me," he seemed sincere, like he had genuinely convinced himself this was for them and not for himself.)

Aziraphale knows Heaven interferes in human affairs, ostensibly on God's behalf. He thinks She should be intervening in ways that are beneficial. What I believe the narrative wants him to learn is that God and Heaven shouldn't be manipulating people at all, not even for Good, and in fact there is no real meaningful hierarchy.

Anyway, a top-down, totally unquestioned hierarchy is the primary social relationship Aziraphale has known, and it's certainly been the dominant one for most of his existence: you're either the boss or the underling, and if someone seriously questions you, they don't have faith in you - they don't respect you.

No, his relationship with Crowley has not always been like that, but they've been creating their relationship from whole cloth, so how would he know it shouldn't become that way, now that it's "real" and out in the open?

No, human relationships aren't like that, but Aziraphale clearly does not see himself or Crowley as human. As the relationship approached something that seemed like it must be "legitimate," Aziraphale would naturally look for a framework to fit it to. And again, the only one he has is the shape of "intimacy," or what passes for it, in Heaven. What has "trust" always meant in all his "legitimate" relationships? It has always meant unquestioning obedience, of course. What have the warm fuzzies felt like in Heaven? Well, praise from the angels above him is nice, so that must be it, right?

Aziraphale even describes being in love as "what humans do," separating out that relationship style. Someday, I think he'll realize he favors the shape of love on Earth, something that's more inherently equal, more give-and-take. Look at how he idealizes it from afar at the Ball. But I think that, like Crowley before Nina pointed it out, Aziraphale maybe hasn't 100% grokked that it can and in fact should work that way for him and Crowley, too. Just like people can desperately want to dance without knowing how to dance, or can desperately want to speak a language without knowing the language, Aziraphale does not instinctively know how to have the kind of relationship where he can be truly vulnerable and handle Crowley's vulnerability as well.

Aziraphale is downright obsessed with French, known as the "language of love." He's trying to learn it the Earthly way. He's not very good at it, but he wants to be.

This pattern is still present during the Final Fifteen even if we assume Aziraphale is asking Crowley to become an angel again out of fear (and I find it very hard to believe that fear doesn't factor in at all). He's still building his interactions off of that Heaven-like framework: he asks Crowley to trust him blindly, he tries to assume a leadership role with a plan Crowley never agreed to and couldn't follow anyway, and he tries very hard not to leave room for an ounce of doubt. He also suggests making Crowley his second-in-command and obviously does not register that this could possibly be offensive. Again, I think this is because for Aziraphale, there has always been a hierarchy in Heaven, it's started to transfer to his relationship with Crowley, and breaking out of that assumption about relationships is going to take more processing than a single argument can do.

As I mentioned in another post, I don't believe Aziraphale had a real choice about whether he accepted the Supreme Archangel position. I think he could sense that he was not getting out of it and chose to look on the bright side, to see it as an opportunity. And instead of looking realistically at how that would feel to Crowley, he tried to sweep Crowley up to Heaven with him using toxic positivity, appeals to morality, and appeals to their relationship itself. Again, mimicking what Heaven has done to him.

To me, "they're not talking" is a big clue that Aziraphale's approach with Crowley is going to be the mistake the narrative really wants him to face. "Not talking" has, thus far, been presented as the central conflict of Season 3! After losing the structure and feedback Heaven gave him, Aziraphale started creating Heaven-like patterns in his relationship with Crowley, and breaking out of those patterns is what he needs to do. Discovering first-hand that Heaven's entire modus operandi is bad no matter who's in charge is how he can do it.

Look, either you're sympathetic to Aziraphale's control issues or you're not. Personally, I am. He's trying so, so hard to be good. I think trying to figure yourself out (which Aziraphale is clearly doing) is hard enough, and when you start balancing what you want for yourself, what you think are your responsibilities, and what other people are actively asking of you, you're bound to fall into the patterns that have been enforced for your whole life or for millions of years, whichever came first.

It is very easy to assume that people should Just Be Better, but it's not actually that simple to be a thinking, feeling person. My anxiety tends to move in a very inward direction and Aziraphale's moves outward. But I'd imagine the desperation and exhaustion are the same.

Unlike Nina, Aziraphale became a rebound mess. I don't think it occurred to either him or to Crowley that there could be any soul-searching, anything but carrying on with the new normal after their stalemate with Heaven and Hell.

Now, instead of getting rejected by Heaven and surviving it, Aziraphale needs to be the one to reject Heaven. It needs to be a choice. And that choice is going to come from realizing that Heaven isn't just poorly managed but also represents a bad framework for all relationships.

How could this happen? Good question. We're obviously not supposed to know yet, although I think picking at existing themes within the narrative could possibly give us hints.

It's possible Aziraphale's character development trajectory will be akin to Adam Young's in Season 1. Please see this stellar post by eidetictelekinetic for more thoughts about it, but basically, in Season 1, Adam saw that the world was not what he wanted it to be and decided his vision was better; as he ascended to power, he took complete control over all his friends and then soon realized that's not what he wants because there's no point in trying to have relationships with people who can't choose you. It's that realization that leads Adam to conclude he doesn't want to take over the world and to reject the role he's expected to play as the Antichrist. Maybe Aziraphale's trip to Heaven is an attempt at a control move during which he'll realize he's defeating his own point.

Aziraphale clearly wants to be chosen. From the very beginning, he's wanted to be special and cared for - just like Crowley has.

Incidentally, I think Aziraphale and Crowley are going to represent pieces of the bigger picture here, and this - first imitating and then rejecting Heaven's relationship style - can both symbolize Heaven's transformation and directly start it (probably in an amusing, somewhat indirect way, like when he handed off the flaming sword to Adam).

If I'm right - which I may very well not be - I think this would all be so, SO cool. Like, "An angel who is subconsciously trying to be a better God" is a concept with so much potential for both tender kindness and incredible darkness. Add to that the comedy-of-errors aspect of "...but even deeper down, he'd much rather just be super gay on Earth" and you have, in my opinion, a perfect character.

I think this could work for Crowley as well. It's obvious that in the Good Omens universe, at least so far, Hell is all about detesting humans and punishing them; Satan seems to genuinely hate humans (unlike in some of NG's other works). Our perspective on this could change, but it potentially puts Crowley in a complementary position to Aziraphale, as a demon who is trying to be "better" than Satan. But this isn't about being "morally better." It's about things having a point. Crowley's exploits usually have a point: they test people. And you can pass his tests! He sincerely likes making trouble, but Crowley doesn't live to punish.

But, once again, the above paragraph would describe a transient phase for this infinitely charming character. Because, again, I think the point will be that in the end, Crowley's deeper-down desire, moreso than testing Creation, is watching it grow with a glass of wine in hand.

[atopvisenyashill]

Who are Sansa’s potential contenders in your opinion?

i’ve talked about this before but i’d love to talk about it again lmao. i think the potential romantic endgame contenders are (in order of most to least likely) jon, brienne, theon, and podrick (there’s a wide gap between theon and podrick) and i use the term romantic like……i mean a little loosely. i’m gonna explain my criteria a bit.

sansa’s suitors must be

within a decade of her age

someone who has, when they meet her, a claim to a seat powerful enough to at least be in the same ballpark as the Starks

someone who would be willing to relocate to winterfell or near winterfell

someone who won't feel threatened by her title

shares her romantic sensibilities

someone whose identity subverts the typical Westerosi idea of what a True Knight and a Proper Husband is

someone who is actively trying and at least partially succeeding at being a good person, but specifically someone who has themes associated with what she desires - a True Knight and Hero From A Song

so let’s explain.

firstly, when we’re talking “potential contenders” i think everyone is picturing something slightly different. i’m talking about like. the relationship that will be one of the focal points of her story going forward, the relationship that will mean the most to her bc it fulfills her dreams while matching her growth and maturity, the relationship her story is building towards her meeting. i think there’s a lot of,,,idk confrontations on the horizon. theon hearing bran in the trees. dany’s nightmare about (probably) euron. everyone and their mother hearing wolves howling in the distance. half these characters are like on a boat, on a dragon, on a walk in the woods, literally on the way to meet someone when we leave them in feastdance and sansa is no exception to this - the Themes Are Coming For Her.

i think there’s been a build up over sansa’s story that she is going to meet The Hero Of Her Dreams, but they will not fit the typical mold of a hero. They will help empower her, protecting her physically while she protects them politically. There will be genuine love, and dedication. A bond to rival Naerys & Aemon, Florian & Jonquil, a person who will love her until the end of her days…a person who is also going to be helpful when it comes to her new role as The Stark In Winterfell. this means a) the line of succession will be dealt with in a practical manner and not swept under the rug and b) someone who likely has some sort of background in either politics or battle.

Maybe it’s a contradiction to say this relationship can be romantic and satisfying to read while also saying there's a chance it will be “subtext” but…I just think, looking at his inspirations being soooo focused on things like courtly love, chivalry, that a spin that involves Sansa feeling a deep affection for a Knight protecting her, with no men around (but again, crucially, having discussed how the hell she’s going to have kids, with a partner who will not shy away from a frank discussion like that) is still a satisfying "romantic" arc. Yes i am saying this is how I have my cake and eat it too, where Braime fucks and then Jaime dies, then Brienne stays in the North with a conveniently (publicly) single Sansa who leans on her for comfort. This is my meta and we're never getting the winds of winter to disprove it, but also I'm thinking specifically of the focus on rumors surrounding the sexualities of a lot of characters in F&B - Alyn and Addam Velaryon, Rhaenyra Targaryen, Laenor and Laena Velaryon, Rhaena the Black Bride, to name just a few very obvious ones - as well as the repeated princess and knight dynamic that follows both Sansa (with Dontos and Sandor) as well as is present in F&B (Rhaenyra & Harwin, Rhaenyra & Criston, Alysanne & Jonquil Darke, Aegon & Visenya imo also fits this) that this dynamic can be romantic but also not explicitly stated to be a sexual or romantic relationship. MOVING ON.

I think it’s actually most likely that Briensa and Jeynsa that are winning the “so which one is actually gonna go canon” war bc they’ll be single, in the same place, and clearly devoted to each other while like, Jon/Theon/Aegon/Sandor/Tyrion/Basically Every Man Shipped With Sansa are miserable and cold or dead elsewhere. (littlefucker isn’t included bc he’s definitely dead 😁). I just need everyone to understand my definition of “goes canon” is so so loose. ANYWAYS. EXPLANATIONS-

within a decade of her age

i am once again saying that every relationship with a huge age gap that starts with one of them below the age of 17 ends badly and the reason is bc george is not a pervy moron, he is actually writing about the ways in which the hypersexualization and forced child marriages in westeros are damaging to these girls. “but he said dany & drogo were in love!!” he’s very clearly the sort who likes to find the romantic and erotic in the grotesque and horrific, and looking at this from the character’s point of view. i think his comments line up just fine with the justifications these girls make to themselves about the marriages they are forced into. also he’s just an old man and he phrases things in ways that make you cringe sometimes, pls be serious 😭 the only exceptions to this rule are really Rhaenys/Corlys and arguably Rhaenyra's various romantic ties but a) none of Rhaenyra's romantic relationships end well and in fact help speed her right along to her gruesome death and b) Rhaenys and Corlys' relationship is fraught with political problems and also, he has an affair with a teenager so again, george is Saying Something about the reasons why certain types of men prefer women much younger than them. "but what about roose and fat walda?" they are both gonna die horribly, next question.

SO. it’s not gonna be tyrion. it’s not gonna be sandor. it’s not gonna be littlefucker. they’re too goddamn old and sansa spending the rest of her life rationalizing these guys perving on her when she’s barely even middle school aged is not (imo) the ending she is going to get.

this leaves us with the rest of her more popular ships - jeyne, margaery, harry, sweetrobin, aegon vi, jon, theon (admittedly pushing it here! i can be logical about this!), podrick, and brienne (technically bran and arya are here too ig, i mean if we want to be really fair to all ships). onto the next criteria-

someone who has a claim to something in the same general social circle as winterfell

technically i do think there’s a chance george goes for something radical at the ending like abolishing the monarchy and if he does that i will kiss him on the mouth (with consent from him & parris). BUT. i think the most likely ending is more of a loosening of the feudal system - showing us the next few hopeful steps away from absolute monarchies. what i’m saying is The System still exists and will still exist throughout twow and ados, so I think it’s logical to assume that Sansa is not going to marry “beneath” her. if anyone does, it's arya.

anyways that’s a double pass on sandor & littlefucker. this is also why i admit pod is a stretch - the paynes aren’t nobodies but pod himself is from a cadet branch, so fairly low in the pecking order . i mostly include him bc i think he’ll make a name for himself alongside brienne, potentially enough to overcome that gap and he fits the rest of the criteria too well imo to completely disregard him. “why can’t sandor or littlefucker do that” bc sandor doesn’t have enough time before the end of the series to make up for all the shit he did as the hound In The Eyes Of The Public Or, Crucially, Sansa’s Family and littlefucker is going to die 😁

you could argue this also crosses out jon and jeyne. COUNTERPOINT - jeyne is a girl it literally doesn’t matter so long as she’s high enough to be one of sansa’s ladies and she is, so she passes; jon is one of three targaryens left alive (and even if aegon's a blackfyre, he doesn't know that so still counts!!) and all the secrecy around jon's legitimacy + robb’s will means clearly something is cooking here. also he has an impressive resume on paper.

someone who would actually live in Winterfell

I don’t feel it’s necessary to argue that Sansa is going to be IN WINTERFELL and END UP IN WINTERFELL bc she lichrally builds Winterfell after Arya, the sibling she interacts with the most, hears a prophecy about a girl slaying a giant IN A CASTLE MADE OF SNOW. This does not feel subtle nor like a stretch. Whether she’s a regent for Rickon/Bran, a ruling lady, or a queen, she is GOING HOME the same as the rest of the Starklings and she will be important in helping rebuild it. Therefore, the person she’s with has to not only be cool with being at Winterfell often, they have to not induce immediate fury and rage in her siblings.

sandor? triple dead. tyrion? we’ll call him 1.5 dead to be polite. aegon vi? doomed and dead. harry hardyng? does Not seem likely to relocate. littlefucker probably would relocate but good luck getting two steps into the north or riverlands without every living starks’ “it’s time to beat that annoying fuck up” alarms blaring in their heads ready to run him through.

theon is a hard maybe but since he actually feels bad & also grew up with them, i think he has plenty of time in the next 2k pages of story to make up some ground with jon, arya, and bran. margaery feels like a hard maybe as well - it’s looking bleak for the tyrells & i don’t think margaery’s family is going to let her move to the north without a good reason. but i also feel like. there’s too many unknowns to technically count her out.

brienne & pod Will be living in the North and they Will be on the guard and That Is That. jeyne & jon don’t seem to have any plans on leaving the North any time soon either.

someone who won't feel threatened by her title

this is a near constant through line in her story - that whoever marries her will want her for her claim first and foremost. it's going to factor into her relationships, specifically about how she's going to have a child. whether she has a secret marriage, longstanding affair, or a public husband, it's going to be someone who is not constantly trying to usurp her power literally or metaphorically.

that means no aegon vi, no sweetrobin, no harry, no littlefucker, no tyrion. tyrion's claim to the westerlands is a competing one with her, and tyrion himself is interested in her title way more than sansa as a person (it's why he doesn't see her escape coming and why he's so bitter over it - the whole time he thought she was a silly girl and had no idea she was plotting to escape and nearly did escape at several points. he thought she was helpless! you can bet your ass he is going to feel threatened by the idea that she does not need his ass). sandor, imo, will also feel threatened by her having such a lofty title, and i cannot see him being capable of any sort of secret marriage. "well they could just marry publicly" she's not publicly marrying a man known to be a child killer. to be completely honest, i think margaery would feel threatened by her title as well.

jon, podrick, brienne, jeyne are all people who would not only not feel threatened, they would be proud, celebrate it, actively fight to keep her in a state of power. theon is imo a maybe - the theon we meet in the beginning would objectively feel threatened by Sansa having a title loftier than his. a theon who has lived through everything he has by the end of the dance is imo much more likely to be happier out of the spotlight. all of them as well would be willing to be frank about how she's going to have a child, and would not mind Sansa saying something like "my children were fathered by a wolf."

someone who shares her romantic sensibilities

listen. she's gonna like, get along with her suitor. someone who won't laugh at her for wanting to be swept off her feet, someone who also craves a more romantic life.

this eliminates, imo, harry, sweetrobin, littlefucker, and sandor, probably aegon vi as well.

brienne, jon, theon, jeyne, and podrick are all romantic types - jon imagines having children named after ned and robb just llike sansa, theon had dreamed as a hostage of marrying sansa and calling ned father, brienne dreams of lofty knightly ideals of protecting the weak, and podrick and jeyne both have stories very much tied to subverting the ideas of a true knight and a damsel in distress.

someone who is an Atypical True Knight

💙✨this is a post about briensa✨💙

true knight/hero from a song themes + marginalized in some way in Westeros = brienne, jon, theon, tyrion. sandor feels relevant here in that he is not a true knight but he clearly wants to be after his encounters with the stark girls and also he doesn't look like one either.

aegon vi could arguably count due to being dornish, so i guess i'll give him a .5 in this category. harry is as typical as they come, and neither margaery nor jeyne have anything that links them narratively to the concept of a true knight or hero from a story (except, i suppose, for jeyne's link to theon). podrick is also fairly typical but again, kinda lowish for a noble so i guess .5, and he also has several scenes where he's expressly linked with being an Atypical True Knight (mainly, the scene where he saves Tyrion during the Battle on the Blackwater).

a True Knight

i simply do not think the lesson sansa is going to “learn” here is that no one will ever love her for who she is and her marriage will be about her claim and nothing more because there are no True Knights left. every time someone is like “she won’t have a romance bc her story is about not needing love” i find it mind boggling because in what world is asoiaf about not needing love, first of all, and second of all, her arc wrt her desires for marriage and love has so clearly been tied to this concept of a True Knight and the idea that a True Knight does not always ~look good~ and that someone who is not a knight may be capable of good and that you can always just Choose To Do Good at any point but you have to Make That Choice, and that is all very different from “not needing love.” Sansa is naive yes but!! Sansa is Dunk sitting there surrounded by strong handsome men in expensive, gorgeous armor and asking if there are any true knights among them-

EXCEPT SOMEONE WILL STEP UP TO THE PLATE.

“a dream of spring” means there will be just a little hope. so help Will Come and they will be a True Knight they just won’t take a form she expects. this is a large part of the reason why i’m on the briensa train. Brienne is The Truest Of True Knights! She serves a King she's in love with who doesn't love her back faithfully, she swears a vow to Sansa's mother after comparing Catelyn's courage to that of a knight's and laments the fate of women who die unremembered in a birthing bed, she's on a noble quest to find Sansa with an assist from The Most Infamous Knight In Westerosi History, she’s the secret descendant of The Other Truest Of True Knights, and I feel it’s very clear from geography, theme, and foreshadowing standpoints that Brienne and Sansa are going to be linking up soon.

I have always felt that the Ashford Tourney Theory is linking Sansa to both Jon and Brienne narratively - Jon for being the dark haired Targaryen Prince defender and Brienne for being the Dunk descendant and True Knight that interrupts the tourney. Not only that, but Jon has that "she wished for a hero to strike him down" "ed, fetch me a block" parallel that I think is really important.

BUT. They're not the only ones with links like this. Theon has the similar link of how life is not a song and is actively grasping for redemption when we last left him. Podrick, like Brienne, is on a True Knight's quest to save Sansas and is discounted as a hero despite having several heroic moments for himself - including actively seeking Brienne out to help with her quest. Tyrion frequently struggles with concepts of morality but is on an absolute downward trajectory.

Who is not tied to these last two concepts nor acts at all like a True Knight? Aegon VI (arguable I suppose), Harry Hardyng, and once again, Littlefucker.

IN SUMMATION

Who doesn't fit any of the critera? Littlefucker, and that's why his ass is grass.

Who fits very little of the criteria? Tyrion (too old, not likely to live in Winterfell, cares too much about her title, on a downward spiral), Sandor (too old, too low born, not a True Knight and not becoming one any time soon, plus Arya will kill him if he tries something), Aegon VI (would not relocate, is not tied to the concept of a True Knight, plus he's doomed), Harry Hardyng (would not relocate, cares too much about titles, is not a true knight nor atypical in way, doesn't seem given to romantic sensibilities).

Who fits most of the criteria? Jeyne Poole and Margaery Tyrell. However there are pretty big plot reasons Margaery won't have any sort of romantic, subtext or otherwise, long lasting relationship with Sansa so even though on paper she fits, I think she's highly unlikely to impossible.

Who fits all of that criteria, ie, close to her age, has an important name (or has a reason why it doesn't matter), and is an Atypical True Knight with a romantic outlook on life with narrative links to Sansa? Brienne of Tarth and Jon Snow, and arguably Theon Greyjoy and Podrick Payne.

Anyways I think Sansa should start a bisexual polycule in the North. Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[plantsjustwannahavefun]

I am once again begging Ed stans to understand that it's possible to love Ed and believe he deserves love AND also admit that he mistreated and tormented the crew during the Kraken era. Not only is this possible, this is the position the show wants you to have. You think Izzy deserved everything he got? Fine, whatever, forget about him for a minute. There's a whole crew in there you're supposed to empathise with and feel sympathy for, too. The six of them that Ed actively tried to kill or left for dead, for starters. Pay attention to the crew's experiences and reactions. They're shown to be traumatised, grieving, clinging to disassociation (Frenchie) and nihilism (Archie) as coping mechanisms and suffering from PTSD flashbacks. And, since this type of fans constantly go on about how it's racist to think Ed did anything wrong... what about the fact that a lot of the crew are PoC too? What then?

If you've watched the first 3 episodes of S2 and there was only one person on that ship you felt sorry for, then you're not a fan of OFMD, you're just a fan of Ed in isolation. And if the only way you can love Ed is by denying that he ever did anything wrong, then you're completely missing the point of the show. OFMD never said that people only deserve to be loved if they're morally perfect and flawless. The show doesn't subscribe to the dichotomy of Good vs Bad. Good people can do bad things. They can hurt the ones they love. Even if they didn't mean to, even if they themselves were suffering at the time, it doesn't mean they don't need to take responsibility for their actions or avoid the consequences. Stede didn't mean to hurt Mary and his kids when he left, but he still did. He had legitimate reasons for leaving, he didn't just do it for the lolz, but it was still wrong and Mary was right to be angry at him. And Stede needed to face up to this - not just for their sake but his too. Even though it turned out their lives were better off without him, reconciling with Mary was still crucial for his character development.

It was the same for Ed, it just didn't get handled quite as well due to lack of screentime, but the idea was the same. When Ed realises he'd been cruel to Fang and apologises, he isn't sinking into self-hatred and despair. Quite the contrary, this is a moment of growth for him. Because the fact is, just because you as a human being are inherently worthy of love doesn't mean you can go around hurting everyone and expecting them to put up with you. That's just not how it works. You don't need to be perfect, but you do need to listen to people when they tell you that you hurt them and apologise genuinely and try to be better. The show is very sympathetic to Ed but it does NOT excuse his actions. The crew aren't portrayed as villains or antagonists for being scared and angry at Ed for what he did to them. Even Stede was on their side with this one. If even Stede is able to see things from the crew's POV and have sympathy for them, then you should too. Stede doesn't love Ed because he sees Ed as a pure uwu angel. He loves Ed... because he just does. He loves being around him. They really click together. They have so much in common. That doesn't mean he approves of literally everything Ed has ever done. It just means he loves Ed despite that.

[waffleweirdo]

Thinking a lot about Junna and Nana today.

Nana started her loops to protect the other stage girls from the future (obviously in her own twisted way, but she still believes this). Yet Junna is constantly looking for a star in the future and seeking growth. Especially considering the Revue of Hunting, it seems like Nana wanted to protect Junna from a future where Nana believed she would fail.

It makes me think a lot about their relationship. In the Overture manga (the chapter where they both run for president) it’s pretty clearly shown that they both have been incredibly lonely and how that has affected them. They have had struggles with people believing in them for choosing to become stage girls. Junna with her family, and Nana with her being abandoned by Hisame. They have had a lot of shared experiences, and I think most crucially shared fears.

The two of them relate to each other a lot. And rely on each other for support too. But they still don’t really understand each other. I mean they had been roommates for months before they ever started using each others first names. Junna remarks how she doesn’t know anything about Nana in episode 9. The two of them are simultaneously transparent to each other, and obscured. They understand each others weaknesses incredibly clearly, but due to their own fears of loneliness and connect they fail to be honest with each other and truly connect. They are disjointed.

Don’t get me wrong they both deeply care about the other, but I believe they both think they understand the other perfectly yet are very wrong. They each perceive the other with their own biases. For instance the repeated use of, the other not being the person they know in the movie.

Junna sees Nana’s kindness and loneliness incredibly clearly. And tried to support her in those ways, but fails to see how her insecurities have led to Nana’s need for control in the revues.

Nana sees Junna’s determination and fears of inadequacy. But doesn’t recognize the strength she has to keep going.

That’s just a small portion, but it’s what first came to mind.

I think this disconnect is really the motivations behind the Revue of Hunting. Nana specifically doesn’t believe Junna can survive as a stage girl. Nana herself has faced pain and suffering as a stage girl. She locked herself in the loops out of immense fear of the future when a stage girl is supposed to grow. She doesn’t even realize that she was still a stage girl until Junna comforts her. She hates Starlight, and hates the idea of people being torn apart searching for ‘the lead’. When she sees Junna struggling. Who she had found so dazzling and who had once given her solace she thinks it’s a mercy to crush her dreams. Because ultimately she misunderstands Junna. She doesn’t believe in Junna and so takes it upon herself to end her.

For Junna’s part she has found comfort with Nana. Being able to comfort her, in episode 9, in the cafe chapter of the Overture manga, in the live#2 (shhhh I don’t know what canon is I’m just pulling examples to show their relationship I know I’m talking about the movie and that’s separate from the stage plays I’m sorry). For Junna who feels inadequate and alone being able to help Nana helps to motivate her and give her a purpose. But when she sees Nana in the revue of annihilation she genuinely can’t process it. She doesn’t at all understand Nana and just shuts down, only furthering her struggle for what to be as a stage girl.

I didn’t mean to just talk so much about the Revue of Hunting, but it’s such a good character moment between the two of them I got carried away.

The moral of the story is I love Junna and Nana’s relationship so much. It feels so special between the two of them and how they support each other. While still having conflict that hits so hard because it comes from the same core as their love for each other does. The Revue of Hunting is so cool. So is the Revue of Annihilation. So are all their revues in the show, show is- okay they’re just cool

I haven’t read through all the events yet, but Junana while Nana writes a phantom of the opera script on re live??

The fact that Nana admired Junna for helping a lonely kid who she related to in the overture manga? And then Junna helps Elle too???

I’m sorry I just love them both so much

[kukuandkookie]

Saw someone who apparently really really hated the new direction Link Click season 2 took, to the point they felt like it ruined season 1 in a way that hurt and so on, and I am not here to attack a solely subjective opinion nor to say that Link Click is perfect. But this belief that season 2 was too different from season 1 did get me thinking, because...

Huh. The biggest criticism people had for season 1 was that the main characters outside of Cheng Xiaoshi (Lu Guang and Qiao Ling) were underdeveloped and/or the origins of their powers were unexplained. People freaking out over season 2 means people care more about these characters now. So it's just interesting in that regard. :ooo

I can't comment on this narratively yet, although I have seen people disagree that this goes against the themes of the show (I actually think it could lead to a really intriguing thematic breakdown, since Lu Guang seems so on top of things in season 1, but he isn't in season 2).

Basically, it already leads to a conversation about grief and regret and letting go. Season 1 very explicitly tells you to do these things, to the point of spelling them out repeatedly. Season 2 and beyond will likely implicitly explore these things, even if they directly state something else.

Contradictory themes can still be meaningful; the world is contradictory, so if we see a series challenge itself with a seemingly different set of themes (at first glance), it doesn't automatically mean it's a bad thing. I can see how it may feel like a sellout, but Link Click explores such complex ideas that there's still lots of themes we can enjoy even in the new direction the show is taking—especially when looking at things about moving on and letting go and being human (which we now know Lu Guang is. He isn't the more "perfect" time diver we saw in season 1). And this does begin to unravel the mysteries set up by season 1, and based on the fandom growth, a lot of fans do like it—which, again, I think this indicates an interesting turn of events.

Because the fact is that before season 2, Link Click has always been praised for its narrative but not really its characters. Now, despite the criticism against season 2, it's being praised for both. If nothing else…

We can see more to these characters now, beyond just Cheng Xiaoshi's pain. Now we see Qiao Ling and Cheng Xiaoshi's childhood, Lu Guang's pain, Cheng Xiaoshi's growth, and how they're not only just a group of friends, but a family.

And given the trend of episodic shows turning more narrative-driven, from Gravity Falls to Steven Universe to SVtFoE to Amphibia and more (even in donghua, we have Scissor Seven and The Legend of Luo Xiaohei and even God Troubles Me basically doing this too)… I think a lot of people do want to tell deep, emotionally-connected stories, and if fandom has proven anything, it's that connecting to the characters are crucial. So at the very least, season 2 has achieved that!

[kitkatopinions]

I love the whole “their clothes are made out of Kevlar” thing because

1 that did so much for Weiss, clover, penny, and any other character that’s ever been stabbed, seriously the kevlar theyre buying has to be cheap

2 even IF it was Kevlar, the second most of the female characters in rwby get stabbed/shot on the chest it’s over for them

Like, Kevlar isn’t a magic shield, it still has to cover something to protect it

Yep, it's a defense that works on zero levels. Like not only is it (as far as I know) a headcanon with absolutely no canonical backing, it also does not make sense for Kevlar as we understand it to be super tight and form fitting. And not only is Kevlar as we know it not going to be effective against anything but bullets, but we don't even have the excuse of it being 'actually super special in-universe Kevlar that's works on more stuff' because we've seen spears and claws and arrows go right through the clothes hunter characters wore. And not only does Kevlar only work when it's actually covering the body whereas tons of female characters are designed with skin exposed even in areas that would crucially need protection like the stomach and chest, but it STILL doesn't matter at all ANYWAY, because the clear difference between how the majority of men in the show are designed versus how the majority of women are designed is STILL a problem.

IF we ignore canon and the logical conclusions that come from knowing the misogynistic fratboy like behavior of the early creators/writers of RWBY, and turn our brains off enough to pretend that Yang's short-shorts and low-cut croptop is actually some super magical kind of Remnant Kevlar that manages to grant her a full body extra shield against weapons... It STILL begs the question of why the writers chose to design men and women so differently- not just in regards to clothes, but also in regards to muscle-growth, and also in regards to how age is shown in male characters more than female characters (who tend to be designed to look just like the teenage girls.) Saying 'well the reason so many girls can wear short skirts and have boob windows is that their outfits are kevlar' doesn't mean anything when the real question is actually 'why are the majority of the female characters dressed in impractical or revealing clothes whereas the majority of men AREN'T?'

The Kevlar thing (which by the way, I have no idea who said it, it was just something I saw my friends talk about and share pics of) is just another excuse that doesn't actually work.

[the-power-of-stuff]

thoughts on the changes are to sukka in the live action?

Hi! Thank you so much for this ask! I love this ask, cuz after I watched "Warriors," I immediately went to a bunch of my mutuals screaming "GUYS I have SO MANY THOUGHTS" but I was reluctant to share beyond that group until you opened this door. <3

That said, I really have SO many thoughts. But I'll try to summarize for the purposes of this ask, and if you're interested in reading me rambling on in more detail for 2.5k words, I made a separate post about it here: https://www.tumblr.com/the-power-of-stuff/743357633226031104/the-live-action-sukka-manifesto-that-i-just

Spoilers below!

The more I sit with this episode, and the more I think back on the original, the more endeared I become to OG Sokka and Suki and their relationship from the animated show. I love sassy Suki. I love Sokka also being sassy but then showing us and Suki not only that he is very capable of growth and change, but how badly he desires those things for himself. His growth trajectory is not quite so broad in the live-action version, and thus his training with Suki is a bit less impactful story-wise.

That said, I did have a lot of fun with live-action Sukka. I'm not immune to the fan service they gave us, and I thought Suki's characterization was adorable. She's very different! I realized while writing the above-linked dissertation just how different. And I think her live-action personality fits for the changes that were made to the story and her environment—the fact that she's not a scrappy orphan, but rather the sheltered daughter of a fierce and protective fighter.

And I think I'm generally okay with this change because it made Sokka and Suki's interactions so delightful. There was so much awkward romantic tension, and it was the kind of stuff that Sukka shippers have been trying to squeeze into missing "Warriors of Kyoshi" scenes fic for the past 19 years (oof, that made me feel really old, sorry everyone).

I was disappointed that we didn't get to see Sokka in the Kyoshi Warrior uniform. Less disappointed than I would've been had I not seen the fight scenes in the trailer and noticed he was still in his regular clothes. I think that gave me time to set my expectations low. And actually, the thing I was most poised to be disappointed about was a thing that didn't happen. When I first saw the trailer, I noticed a moment where Suki steps in front of Sokka to block a fire blast, and I thought this was going to replace the moment where Sokka jumps in front of Suki to protect her from a fire blast.

And because I felt like that moment was so crucial for Sokka's character and his relationship with Suki, the idea that we weren't going to get it was more heartbreaking to me than the lack of Sokka in uniform. However...!

Lo and behold, they didn't take this moment away from us, and the instant I saw this on screen, all past transgressions were forgiven lol. Like, honestly, the relief I felt... And we still get to see him use a fan! Even if he's not in makeup.

I go into some more critical analysis in the link above, but overall, I enjoyed what we got from live-action Sukka because I'm a sucker for all the glances and touches and near-kisses. I'm a sucker for all the tenderness they showed to each other right before they went out and kicked firebender ass together. They feel different in a lot of ways from animated Sukka, but I thought it was an interesting interpretation!

And I have a lot of questions about what the changes to their interactions might mean for the future development of their relationship (for example, the fact that they've already had a proper first kiss, and what that means in terms of how Sokka will process his fear and guilt and his feelings for Suki after losing Yue). But I'm curious more than anything about how those things will be handled. And I think it'll be neat if we get to see it.

[ladyluscinia]

So I think I've settled on the first trend in meta I've clocked as weird coming out of S2. Namely that Edward will not apologize to anyone about anything on account of it's not that kind of show, and he shouldn't be expected to or criticized if he doesn't.

Mostly I've seen this backed up with the fact that OFMD is more about being your authentic self than being a good person, and that physical harm is brushed off or prioritized under emotional harm (and Edward was suffering maximum emotional harm). And I mean... Yeah, the show does care about emotional health, but I'm not seeing how that means expecting our protagonists to gain the faintest awareness of their social contract to others is absurd?

Edward and Stede are both wildly self-centered and morally bankrupt people, which is funny. I don't expect them to suddenly gain a respect for the lives of every random stranger they stumble into anymore than I would expect the house vampires from WWDITS to do the same. They aren't going to stop being pirates. And frankly, they don't even have to stop being mostly self-centered (I'm not even sure they could, tbh).

But unlike the house vampires, Edward and Stede have a lot more people in their lives who they are directly responsible for. And we like those people!

The show has not pulled its punches on how Edward and Stede and their relationship issues have hurt the crew. Edward tried to murder-suicide everyone with him after making them miserable! Stede has struggled to even care about their hurts even when Lucius is shouting them in his face! Found family? Where???

The crew is doing a great job of learning to support each other and the captains, but Stede and Edward do not reciprocate that support internally. (They sometimes do against outside threats.) And, yeah, even in my silly black comedy about murderers, I would like to see them say "sorry we used you as physical and emotional punching bags" and show a bit of awareness of their authority before the show sends them off on a happy ending with the crew presumably still working for them?!?

It's not weird to expect crumbs of character growth???

And like, crucially, this isn't even a new idea in the show! Mutual respect and support and trying not to harm each other is the beating heart of Stede's new pirate culture goal. It's fundamental to any social contract where everyone gets to "be themselves" because it's hard for Jim and Archie to do that when Edward decides in his true self / place of authority they actually need to fight to the death for his broken heart. And Stede starts off not doing this correctly because he doesn't instinctively know how to be kind or caring, but that's what character growth is for.

WWDITS has Guillermo as the one person all these terrible people are obligated to give consideration to in their social contract, and they have increasingly learned and shown that reciprocal support. Including apologies.

And I'm not even expecting anything huge. I don't see any reason they need to dwell on it. We don't need to decide which crew members would realistically deem them unforgivable. Edward doesn't have to grovel on his knees. Stede also needs to apologize. And they can both do it in the most awkward, stilted yet sincere way and then put most of their apology effort into changing behaviors, but I still think it should happen.

So I suppose they can have our main couple continue without acknowledging they fucked up with people besides themselves, but it would make them worse people than the WWDITS vampires and I expect the humor to adapt accordingly.

Final scene is them exchanging wedding vows while the crew pitches the anchor they are both tied to overboard?

[bluedalahorse]

What would make August decide to reject the crown prince title?

Well, you know my brand! I actually think it’s possible for August to get to a place where he leaves behind the crown prince role. It’s a bit of a claw machine game, but isn’t that more fun to think about than letting him suffer forever? We love a challenge! We love growth! We like acknowledging the messiness of the character, and not always assuming the worst of every last thing he does! So let’s get into it.

I’m actually not going to talk about Sara much here. A lot of posts that talk about this crown prince situation mention how sad August is to have lost Sara, and while that’s true, I actually think there are other emotional undercurrents at work. Similarly to the way Wille is more than his relationship with Simon and has to leave the monarchy for his own self-actualization, August will leave for reasons that go beyond losing Sara.

I also want to open by agreeing with everything my esteemed colleague @heliza24 says about therapy and time and community in this post over here. What I’m going to say here is going to be long and rambly, but I think it will build on her talking points.

So let’s think about August holistically, in terms of his values. In order to get August out of the monarchy, the first step is understanding (excavating, even, because this shit works in layers) what draws him to it in the first place, and what his emotional needs are. I actually think it’s a common misconception that he’s into the whole thing for the power of it all. I actually think this is more about August’s need for belonging, particularly in terms of his wanting to be part of a family and the way he values traditions that bring people together. Monarchy runs on this idea of a sacred first family that sets the tone for the nation and leads them in following traditions. This ideal family is, in theory, the ultimate exemplar of what August desires in life. And yet the reality of the monarchy is far from the ideal. I think we sometimes assume August has a clear view of what monarchy is like, since he’s related to the royal family and all. But I also think his close proximity clouds his judgment. More details below…

The thing about being in the crown prince position is that at first it would set up opportunities for August to connect with family members, namely Kristina, which initially would meet a family-related need. August seems to hold Kristina in high regard. He’s looking forward to the possibility that she might visit during parents’ weekend in season 1, and he’s pretty afraid of facing her in season 2 when he’s called to the palace. Of course, that is about her position as queen as much as anything, but I can’t help but wondering if it’s also that Kristina was August’s father’s favorite cousin. And isn’t that a fruitful piece of information? There’s so much that can be done with that connection! For instance…

A lot of August’s trauma is rooted in grief. Some of that is complicated grief for Erik, which his reconciliation with Wille (and probably their shared sessions with Boris) has helped him start to feel and unravel. We haven’t really seen August fully grieve his father yet, but I imagine that if there were seasons 4 and 5, this would be the next step in his character arc. Grieving his father is crucial. In season 3, August has (clumsily, in front of Sara when he shouldn’t have said it, but the lines happened and I find them fascinating) just begun to idealize his father less—he says he misses his dad even though his dad was shitty, and that makes me go, okay, what else is behind that line? (A really amazing fanfic by @sflow-er is what.)

Meanwhile Kristina mentions that she and Carl Johan were really close until Carl Johan started to fall into addiction. Lots to peel back there, too! Like, what happened? What was the timeline of all this, and was it a big falling out or a slow breakdown in the relationship? Does Kristina feel any guilt related to August’s father’s suicide, like August himself does? We don’t know how she feels about Louise—is she sympathetic toward her for having to be married to a man who was potentially abusive? Or would Kristina have bought into Carl Johan’s potentially false narrative of Louise, and blamed Louise for her husband’s addiction and mental health crisis?

Whichever direction you take this, I think working with Kristina day to day would bring up opportunities for August to confront his sense of loss. Kristina probably has all kinds of stories about August’s dad, and how they got up to trouble together in their childhood and youth, and which now-deceased family members responded to their antics. August might be able to share a few stories about his dad as well. Sharing memories is an important part of the grieving process, for so many people, and I imagine at first August would feel connected to his father’s side of the family for the first time in a while, and there might be some good things that come of it.

On the other hand… those initial benefits might not last forever. And August would soon discover the fucked up aspects to that side of the family. It’s possible Kristina might try to help August mend his relationship with his mother, but in the scenario I mentioned above (Kristina buys into Carl Johan’s narrative of Louise and blames her for his death) I can see her trying to interfere when August and Louise try to repair their relationship. Wouldn’t that create some fun tension between August and Kristina? I do think August wants to repair his relationship with his mother. As mad as he is with her in season 1, we also see hints in seasons 2 and 3 that he doesn’t actually hate her and wants to feel connected to her. After graduation he goes to find her and Rickard in the graduation line where all the parents are holding photos. I could see a situation where August, a year or two after canon, decides he wants to patch things up with his mom, and keeps running into pushback from Kristina about it. Aren’t there so many ways that tension could escalate? Wouldn’t that be a fun thing to play with in fanfic?

And then there’s Wilhelm. The way I read their reconciliation, it felt like August would try to maintain a good relationship with Wilhelm in the future. What does that become if he ends up in a position where he’s always mediating between Kristina and Wilhelm now that their relationship has fractured? And then we know Kristina tried to turn Wilhelm into Replacement Erik, I can absolutely imagine a situation where she starts thinking of August as Replacement Wilhelm and behaving accordingly, and August grows to resent that. Ultimately I can see August siding with Wilhelm over Kristina in the end and they end up banding together.

All those paragraphs above basically just mean that like… I feel like being in the crown prince role might bring a lot to the surface for August, in terms of how he relates to his family. And once he sees what wounds being crown prince can’t heal, that’s going to shatter his idealism and make him question the monarchy as a representation of the family in general. And that’s an important step out the door.

Now, August also needs to see what alternatives to this “perfect ideal family model” are out there. He also needs to realize that family isn’t just about blood relatives. Which just means he needs honest friendships with people who don’t subscribe to that kind of patriarchal nonsense. I don’t mean August needs patient queer friends who will hold his hand and explain the concept of heterotemporality to him in a soft voice. I just mean that being around more people who break his mental schemas in that regard would be a good thing. Like how does his friendship with Nils develop now that Nils has come out? What if, I dunno, it turns out that Louise and Rickard are both bisexual and poly? And then of course there’s his continued relationship with Wilhelm, which I imagine he’d continue to invest in now that they’ve turned things around at the end of season 3.

Does that wrap up the family stuff for now? Probably. There’s a thousand more things I could talk about but we’ll put it aside for now.

I mentioned August valuing tradition in my opener, so I want to address that too. Surface August—aka the protective suit of armor August has constructed for himself in season 1—seems to value tradition for its own sake, and mostly defines inclusion for some as something that can only exist when there’s exclusion of others. These are all the broken things Surface August has been taught or (we now know) traumatized to believe, and they come out in his behavior, and it sucks.

At the same time, what happens over three seasons is that we see there’s this deeply buried version of August that’s struggling to get out, and in my opinion at least, that deeply buried August actually gives a shit about others feeling a sense of belonging. I feel like this part of August is influenced by his own experiences with isolation and loneliness, and we see glimmers of him from time to time. (Especially when it’s Vincent doing something exclusive and shitty, for whatever reason. See August standing up to Vincent when Vincent is shitty to Simon in 2.3.) I think for August, traditions and rituals and events are something he sees as being deeply important in creating a sense of belonging for people. And he’s not fully wrong. Traditions and events done right are how humans make sacred their bonds with one another… which is why you get a bunch of Wilmon wedding headcanons. Because we love traditions too, you know.

As much as August gets a reputation for being rigid, there are times when we’ve seen him budge from what’s expected of him and change up the rules. I think August is actually more willing to rewrite tradition than fandom gives him credit for. He’s got suggestions for the speech Jan-Olof wants him to recite verbatim. He tells Vincent to rethink the senior superlatives. And he’s one of the third years who makes a pact to remove the really homophobic part of the initiation. 

I say this not to give August undue credit—these are half-steps and there’s clearly more he can do, and some of these traditions should be eliminated, not modified. But I want to point out two things. First, that imperfect half-steps (and some pretty epic backslides) were part of Wilhelm’s journey too before he made his full break with the monarchy. Second, by season 3, we can see that August is actually capable of reflecting about traditions and considering ways they could be rewritten to create more of a sense of belonging for others. 

Again, this is imperfect, and we may want him to do more… and this is another place where he could potentially end up clashing with the royal court in time. One thing that I’ve thought about is that being a prefect at Hillerska is a little different—in theory if not in practice—than being the crown prince of Sweden. As a Hillerska prefect you’re just leading the elite and the few who get into your school, but as crown prince you really are supposed to be there for the nation as a whole (albeit in a “non-divisive” way) and I think August does actually recognize that distinction and would try to approach it differently than being prefect or rowing captain. Except he would continue to be a total overachiever.

Like, look. On some level August would be incredibly earnest about the idea of being the keeper of Sweden’s traditions, and earnestness is not the same as being a rubber stamp or a yes-man. The royal court may think they’ve finally got someone who will carry out whatever monarchical agenda they set without question but like… idk, do they? Do they really??? August is going to want say in the process, and August is going to have so many ideas about how to make traditions better/more awesome, and August is going to annoy the hell out of Jan-Olof and Farima. He is going to be so annoying! He is going to have slides presentations! He is going to crunch the data on how the royal family is getting bad press for their carbon footprint and come up with a plan for renewable fuel on the private jet so now they can totally show people they’re legit! Meanwhile he’s going to be annoyed when his ideas are getting blocked. And I find the slow build in conflict that would arise out of a situation like that pretty entertaining.

Okay, it’s time to wrap up. For real this time. (This would all be better in a fanfic than in an analysis post, really! I should write.) Ultimately I think August would be drawn into the monarchy because he’d see it as a way of living his values of family and tradition and hell, service to the nation and being part of something, but he’d grow frustrated and disillusioned when it didn’t, actually, allow him to do that or give him the space to do it. The answer to Rickard’s question—does the monarchy love you back?—is no. And I don’t know how long post-season-3 August is willing to put up with being unrequited like that. Maybe for a time, but not forever.

You may also wonder why I have faith that he’ll get here. And the simple answer is: after season 3, my faith in August is intertwined with my faith in Wilhelm. Wilhelm breaking with the monarchy at the end of season 3 (especially after some pretty intense backsliding moments.) shows me that it’s possible for August to do it too, someday. That is perhaps a post for another time. For now, let’s just look forward to all the opportunities for a fix-it fic.

[thefirstknife]

Mara is being a classic manipulative abuser trying to sway everyone to pity her and putting the spotlight on her own grief rather than the immeasurable suffering she has caused others, and the fandom is falling for it hard. As someone who will spend likely the rest of my lifetime healing from the hurt caused by someone like her and hangs out with many fandom friends with the same experiences... it's just really anxiety inducing and hurtful to see how large chunks of the fandom are so quick to praise and adore her for her "character growth". She is upset to be facing consequences for her actions and is trying to get pity. She is a horrible person and a fantastic character and she should be allowed to be the asshole that she is. She doesn't have to be good to be enjoyable. I am terrified the narrative will go the way of having Crow forgive her because that's the "good" and "kind" thing to do, thus essentially saying abuse victims need to be the "bigger person" and forgive their abusers. Not even gonna get into how she used the Awoken people from the first moment. There's nothing wrong with loving Mara but I think all of you need to take a step back and listen to people who have met real life Maras and understand just how messed up your support of her is when you're touting her as this traumatised person just trying to do what she believes is right (true) which makes her good and worthy and simply misunderstood (false, her trauma doesn't absolve her of being a cunt). She isn't growing, she's just further manipulating people and making things about herself. There is no moral failing in enjoying characters who are horrible people. She's no different from Clovis with her god complex and having slightly more noble intentions doesn't excuse her whatsoever. Her remorse might be genuine but at the moment she isn't seeking to provide any reparations to her victims, she just want people to feel bad for her being sad.

I was abused by my older brother, emotionally and physically, who manipulated (and still does) people around him.

I shouldn't have to say this, but I'm getting really tired of people assuming that everyone who sees some value in Mara's character growth has never been abused. That assumption is disrespectful and forces the person you're telling this to out themselves about their own abuse. Because if I don't, then people will just continue saying that I can't possibly understand what it's like. I understand. Unfortunately, personally. I would advise not to approach random people telling them that they can't understand what it's like because they happen to like Mara as a character.

Another thing that I want to mention at the start is that I have never in my life claimed that Mara did nothing wrong or that she isn't a bad person. She is. It's a part of the reason why she's a fascinating character. She's an uncompromising leader who worked under the idea that the end justifies the means and that she is the only one that can see us through to that end. It's a cruel life for everyone around her.

Her trauma doesn't absolve her of being a cunt, but it does explain why she is one. I think this is not only valuable, but crucial to understand because that explains that her cruelty wasn't out of sick malice and enjoyment of hurting others.

If we want to care about abuse, we have to understand that parental neglect is also abuse. Mara is also an abuse victim. This also doesn't absolve her of her actions, but it does explain them. Mara's recent new line in which she tells Elsie about Osana Sov, her mother, is a classic abuse victim story about parental abuse. It's one that rarely gets acknowledged because that type of abuse is structured specifically in a way to go unnoticed. But it's abuse nonetheless. And I'm sorry but if we care about abuse victims, we also have to care about abuse victims who become cunts. That's the only way to really fix the situation.

And I do genuinely believe in fixing the situation. I know that a lot of people don't want their abusers to get better or to change and I also know that a lot of people don't believe that their abusers CAN get better and change, but they can. Not all of them of course, but some can. Insisting that Mara is not actually changing and is just pretending and being manipulative again is your trauma talking. The text is incredibly clear in this scenario and it's not just coming from Mara herself; it's coming from people around her. So unless we believe that literally every character (including incredibly perceptive ones like Elsie or Ikora) would fall for Mara's every word even when they never did so previously, Mara is genuinely changing and she isn't manipulating anyone or pretending to be trying to get better for good girl points. That's incredibly uncharitable interpretation where you have to go out of your way to insist that she's just pure evil. It's equally incorrect as saying that Mara is pure good.

Again, I know that not everyone is capable of dealing with that in the same way or same time as someone else. There was a time in my life when I genuinely wanted my brother to just die and be gone from the world and that he is not deserving of any introspection or the ability to change. And I know there are horrific people who have done truly unforgivable things and that it's hard to think about them as people deserving of effort and change. But if those people put in the effort and want to change, we have to give them that second chance.

Of course, their victim is not obliged to help them or be in their presence ever again. This is a right that Crow is currently exercising, with no end in sight. But if he eventually chooses to give it a go? His story will not be worth any less to an abuse victim. It won't align with everyone's story, but it will align with some of them and again, if we care about abuse and abuse victims, then we also have to care about those that aren't identical to us. It's not about being the "bigger person." I don't want to be prove being a bigger person to my brother, I just genuinely think that it would be better for everyone involved if he changed and worked through all of our issues and we were a normal family.

The text is also more than clear about Clovis who has never in his life believed that he is wrong or that anything that he did was wrong, including all suffering he caused to all of his family and humanity. Like, this cannot get any clearer. And the game directly made that comparison to debunk it in a very on-the-nose way: in a full dialogue in-game. Clovis doesn't think anything he did was wrong; Mara does (and Rasputin admits to the same).

I would also like to point out that the game is filled with abusers who never get a fraction of the same flack. Calus is a massive abuser who neglected and emotionally manipulated and punished Caiatl her whole life, as well as treated his people as accessories to his own goals and tossed them into suffering and death for his own amusement. Not even for anything dire like saving all life in the solar system; for pure amusement. Reading about Gahlran is a special type of horrific depiction of Calus' disregard for people's autonomy and safety.

People also for some reason don't see it, despite it being incredibly clear in the lore book, but the Witness abused Rhulk into obedience through isolation and manipulation. It picked Rhulk because he was already on the edge and then it used isolation and manipulation abuser tactics to sway him away from his people and turn him into the genocidal unquestioning obedient follower that he became.

Savathun was also a fairly abusive person as well and probably the best comparison with Mara. She was knowingly manipulating her siblings, and her nephews, and also her children, for whom she had very little love and care. She also completely ignored them and left them pretty much for dead when she decided to become a Lightbearer. And you know what? Savathun is also an abuse victim herself as well. She is a traumatised person that has been on the receiving end of manipulation and we all feel very bad for her circumstances. And Savathun also wanted a second chance; and she got it!

Clovis was a massive abuser whose wife had to run away from him and hide, who did not see his child and his grandchildren as real individual people. He manipulated every single one of them, most of all Elsie, to whom he most likely lied about her disease to make her accept the Exo body and to whom he directly said that he is in control of all information about her own body. He also did not view any people as real people and instead, they were all experiments. Reading his logbook and his extra experiments (warning for medical trauma and body horror) is, to borrow words from an in-game character, "a gratuitous exercise in horror." He has never, not once, said or did anything that shows he regrets it or thinks anything he did was wrong.

You might say "but nobody is making excuses for Calus or Savathun or the Witness or Clovis!" And like, yes they are. They're never addressed as abusers and they have plenty of fans who treat them just like their cool blorbos. A really interesting example is the Witness who, by god, has a really cool design, but whom people are consistently treating only like a sexy otherworldly alien who is just sooo shippable with its abuse victim.

And as much as that makes me super uncomfortable, same as Calus bros who to this day swear that he's actually someone worthy of following or that Clovis is just a poor little meow meow that everyone is being too mean to, I am not here to tell people that they aren't allowed to do those things. And I am not going to send them guilt-tripping asks telling them that I am an abuse victim and that they cannot possibly have similar experiences because they post positively about these characters. And I certainly can't claim that none of them understand abuse.

I don't know why Mara is the only one that gets this sort of response. Mara is both an abuser and an abuse victim, she was a miserable person as a human to the point where she straight up decided to commit suicide. She was a cruel leader who believed that only she alone can save the world and that everybody else is at her disposal to be used as she wants. And she has since learned how awful she was and regrets it. She wants to change and be better. No matter the timeline, she remains our steadfast ally until the end. It's really not that difficult. There's no double or triple deceptions and manipulations involved.

Me and many others have actually literally been talking about how Destiny writing is currently focused so much on every character sounding like they've been going to therapy and how everyone is super introspective about their problems and wrongdoings. I assume this is because we're slowly wrapping things up and we can't have characters being too ambiguous in the face of our endgame enemies, but no matter what's the reason for it is, the conflicts and characters have been getting increasingly more straightforward. Mara is not going to flip the switch on us.

If you for any reason can't stand to see a storyline in which someone like Mara gets a second chance, that's something that you will have to deal with in your own time. Disengaging from the story is okay. Disengaging from the fandom is okay. Sometimes media will tell a story about your experience that doesn't align with yours perfectly, but it does align with other people who have been through similar issues.

And in case of Destiny, this is a story whose main theme is "second chances." Mara wants one so she deserves one. Savathun wanted one and she deserved one. Even Calus or Clovis or even the Witness; if they want one, they deserve one. It's okay to not want to forgive any of them personally and even to struggle with the fact that the story is trying to pass that as the right thing to do, but again, that's something for everyone to deal with in their time. And please don't make assumptions about other people and their relationship with abuse.

[keyofjetwolf]

The Pallbearers Club, by Paul Tremblay

Did I like this? Did I not? YOUR GUESS IS AS GOOD AS MINE

Let's start with the things I can say for sure. (Light spoilers to follow, but nothing too egregious.)

I loved the idea behind this, and the style that carried it through. The basic gist here is a memoir written by this guy, Art Barbara (fake name), who is a general sad sack disaffected Gen X'er who loves music and crawling up his own ass. His memoir -- beginning around 1988 when he's 17 and going through to the "now" of 2020-ish -- is scattered with commentary, refutations, and alternate points of view by his oldest friend, Mercy (also fake name), who has found and is reading the book.

LOVED THIS. Loved what essentially comes down to dueling unreliable narrators. Loved what could almost be considered a four-way conversation between Art, Mercy, the author, and the reader about memory and nostalgia, choice and blame, growth and stagnation. There's some good shit here.

DID NOT LOVE how ponderously long it took to get there. At around 270 pages, this isn't an over long book, but ye gods, did it feel like it took FOR FUCKING EVER sometimes.

(We get a bit more spoilery under the cut)

And it's tough to know whose fault that is, or if it's a "fault" at all. Those navel-gazing, aimless parts, that's Art, that's his life, in his own words, as inescapable to us as it feels to him. Is it a fault that I'm sitting here like "Oh my god my guy GET THE FUCK ON WITH IT" when I'm pretty sure that's exactly the way I'm supposed to feel about him?

Quite possibly not, but we also probably could've gotten that with like twenty pages less of Art meandering through the Providence music scene.

In many ways, the book never really grows beyond its premise, but again, is that the point? The characters themselves are rooted in place, perpetually locked in a space that has been swallowed by years and abandoned by relevance. Even Bob Mould went solo, kids.

I think to fully decide my feelings on The Pallbearers Club, I might have to read more by Paul Tremblay. This is my first exposure to his work, so it's tough for me to say with confidence what's stylistic choice versus stylistic failing. Is pondering and aimless more Art, or Paul?

You may note, if you've read the book or even just the publisher's description, I've completely left out anything to do with horror or supernatural or whatever. Those parts are there, for sure, even crucial to the central glue of the plot, but I found them surprisingly extraneous. Even by "this isn't really about this" horror standards, it all felt irrelevant. Or perhaps the more correct word is incidental. I'm not even sure the author (the Art author) intended his readers to believe he was truly dealing with spoopy spoops, or if he was just metaphoring super hard, with that particular brand of pretentious arrogance only the truly insufferable can wield.

So yeah, I still have no idea if I liked it or not. I may also have uncomfortably identified with some stuff in here, which was very rude, but anyway. Hell of a premise, though, and done well enough that I'll happily try another of Paul Tremblay's books.

[blushydiorrb]

blushydior

    ♡⊹˚₊ 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋 𝐆𝐔𝐈𝐃𝐄 ₊˚⊹♡

𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅: 𝐁𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀 𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐃𝐀𝐘

this is nothing but an enhancement of the person already within you. this is not to say you aren’t perfect in your own beautiful way and you need to change your whole self because you’re “not up to par”. i make this post to tell you to never put a limit on your growth because change is constant and the smallest things make the absolute biggest difference. this is an endless self improvement journey where you will make clear of your beautiful qualities buried underneath, embody the person you’ve always wanted to become, and find new lovely sides of yourself in the process. the idea of change, even in the slightest, shouldn’t be feared but instead welcomed. there is nothing better than evolving and being a better person than you were yesterday. remember that you can change at any time. you don’t have to wait until a new year, month, or week and note that it’s never too late to do so. there is no other time than now. this post will always be here for you to look back on. and of course, despite the mentions of dream girl, this post is for EVERYONE.

to start and this is very crucial, ask yourself a series of questions:

what are my deepest values in life? envisioning the dream person i desire to be, do the habits i hold support me on this journey? what are some things i need to let go of that i’ve been putting off? how have i been feeling these past few months? do the people i socialize with inspire & encourage me in my endeavors?

really take your time to think about what you value, ways you can support them and analyze things in your current life.

now that you’ve got the foundation, let’s begin and become the dream girl you want to be. 

do right by you. you can’t do right by others if you abandon yourself for the sake of them.

              𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐄𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐔𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

bring out the journal because we are going on a self discovery journey! 

what are your goals that you’ve been wanting to achieve? start a business, do better in school and be at the top of your class, getting to places on time, be more open to meeting new people, reading more books a month, being more elegant, gentle, and kind…

what does the dream person in your mind look like? what habits and kind of friends do they have? how do they spend their time? how do they carry themselves? 

what are some things you need to let go of in order to successfully embody this person? socializing with toxic people, not having structure in the day, excess social media usage, substance consumption, sleeping in, procrastinating, victimizing, the negative self-talk, gossip, letting people step all over you…

what are some habits you’ll need to cultivate? lessen social media usage, waking up and going to sleep early, eating healthy, exercising, picking up old and new hobbies again, more walks, starting work right away, being kind to yourself…

                   𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐄𝐓𝐎𝐗

digital declutter: delete any and all useless apps. most of them are to be real with you. you don’t have to check your influencer’s new posts and vlogs and you will be okay if you miss out on the newest internet trends. for a little more push on letting go of social media, read my post on digital minimalism here.

remember, that this is a self development journey. you can’t and won’t accomplish the goals and habits of the it girl you want to be if you’re on your phone for more than half the day. be raw with yourself. let go of social media.

social group: really take some time to think about the people you hang around with. are they supportive? negative? do they talk bad about others? criminals? are they goal setters and high-achievers? do they support you and your goals? do they hang around with bad people?

the people you socialize with tells a lot about your character. seriously! if you hang out with people who treat others like garbage (for no reason), if THEY knowingly socialize with people who do tons of horrible things, where do YOUR morals lie? yes, they have been nice to you and you’ve known them for years but that excuse begins to fade when you are striving to be a better person and morals come into play. the environment you tolerate will hold you back. 

don’t feel bad about doing this. i did at first but it’ll go away, trust me when i say you’ll do so much better. 

most importantly, self care: how you carry and treat yourself shows others how to treat you. once you acknowledge what you are worthy of, you will not allow yourself to settle for anything that doesn’t meet your standards and much less allow yourself to tumble back into old, unhealthy ways.

enforce boundaries on yourself and others. get rid of the habits of bashing yourself when you make an honest mistake or your work performance/grades are low, stop saying horrible things when you look in the mirror, stop complaining and staying up at night for unnecessary reasons, damaging your health, stop letting people insult you, quit over explaining yourself.

detox ending note: again, take it easy with yourself. the more you exercise and strengthen your self-discipline, the easier this detox will be for you. you can start by applying a few habits at a time until it’s basically a part of a routine and go on from there but you have to remember to take it seriously in implementing it into your daily routine/life.

tell yourself that you are doing amazing because you are! you are striving to be better you every single day! how is that not admirable? you are always doing your best even if it may not feel like it.

     𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

now that you have a clear vision of things even if it’s little! you need to do in order to fully embody your dream self, it’s time to put things into motion.

how can you do this? enforcing self-discipline and setting boundaries. 

think of motivation as a power boost at the starting line and your foot pressing on the pedal of your car is discipline, it’s what keeps you going forward on your journey. motivation, as fleeting as it is won’t bring you far but self-discipline will. 

             DEVELOPING SELF DISCIPLINE

self-discipline: the ability to control one’s feelings and overcome one’s weaknesses; the ability to pursue what one thinks is right despite temptations to abandon it.

boundaries

a line that marks the limits of an area; a dividing line.

a limit of a subject or sphere of activity.

remind yourself of the life you want to live and the person you desire to be, remember that all of your desires have always been within reach. you just have to break out of the barrier you’ve put up for yourself, fight through the fear and the “what if’s” and just do it! the person you wish to be is already within you. 

thinking of and wanting to start is one thing but actually starting, no matter how small has already moved mountains you can’t yet see. 

                         WHERE TO START

self-discipline and boundaries go hand in hand. setting healthy boundaries will shine light on the path you want to take by making sure you’re staying protected by actions made by you and other people and discipline keeps you in check so that you can go about your self improvement journey the best that you can!

this can look like…

overcoming the urge to wallow in past failures and instead looking forward to a chance at a new beginning.

putting yourself first. taking care of your mind, body, and soul.

getting out of bed to finish your tasks even if you wanted to sleep in.

correcting yourself when you were slipping up on an old habit without self criticism.

making sure your boundaries allow you to grow and fix them as you seek fit

learning the best ways to say no and yes

being more considerate and kind to yourself and others.

not letting futile thoughts, ideas, and actions hinder your progress.

finally putting forth projects you’ve pushed aside. 

picking yourself back up after a difficult time even if it took a while.

more on boundaries here: BOUNDARIES 101

habits to acquire:

thinking of which times you felt down and uplifted and figuring out what contributed to those feelings. avoid habits and situations that don’t serve you and bring in more of what made you feel good about yourself and how you can further enhance that experience.

not rushing your personal journey

having a set routine. morning + night ideas.

standing firm on your boundaries

stop comparing.

becoming a digital minimalist

identifying with old habits and perceptions of yourself

investing in your appearance (because pampering is relaxing!)

not caring about what others think of you

taking care of your mind, body, and soul. tuning into what you need and what is best for you, fully influenced and putting things into motion because it’s what you truly want, not for pleasing others or trying to “fit in”

enjoying stillness

indulging in old and new hobbies every day. make it a priority!

more ideas here!

CONTINUING TO STRENGTHEN DISCIPLINE

how do habits form? how do people get better at what they set their minds to? by figuring out what works for them and what doesn’t, what their roadblocks are and from then on, repetition and consistency. 

keep in mind that healing and improvement is subjective. make it work for you so that you are setting yourself up for success. take what you see from posts like these, videos, and books and refine it to make it fit perfectly with how you would like things to go.

take the habits you intend to leave behind and the ones you’d like to acquire and map out how you would go about leaving the past in the past to welcome in the new. 

figure out what your roadblocks are. when there comes a time where it’s hard to continue forward on your path, tune into your body and mind. what is it telling you? there is something that is bothering you that needs to be addressed. are you well rested? have you had enough water today? are you overstimulated? are there any illnesses that can easily flare up and be the reason why you’re feeling this way? 

don’t beat yourself up for feeling demotivated and unreasonably drained. most of the time, it’s really not the case. you just need to figure out what is going on and address it gently and sometimes you won’t really know what’s going on until later on and that’s okay! 

i would always feel drained or overstimulated with my depression, adhd, and chronic fatigue. it would cause me to flare up and enter episodes (depressive and manic). the things i would realize was that it was either caused by: an triggering/traumatic event, intense emotions that didn’t have an outlet, continuous outings. and sometimes flares up will just happen and i began to understand that. 

i didn’t blame myself for having illnesses. i just grew aware that what really matters is: i get through it every. single. time. and i will be okay even if i literally felt my world was crashing down on me yet again.

something that can help when dealing with episodes is that when you feel it coming on, prepare yourself so you can get through it even if it makes the experiences just a little bit better by 1%. taking a shower and brushing your teeth, cleaning up your space, gathering snacks and easy to make meals, telling a trusted loved one you won’t be available but might need their support, trying your best to go on walks even if it’s hard, putting on comfortable clothes, etc.

which one works for you? working your way up, going all in or both? it really all depends on what this method applies to. if you think changing your routine by the slightest will be a good step, do it or if you feel confident that deleting all the apps on your phone all at once is something you want to do, go all in.

keep track of your accomplishments. tracking your accomplishments will show how much you’ve done and keep you on your feet! nothing beats the feeling than looking back at all the things you’ve done before heading towards the rest of your goals with your head high. anything is possible. remind yourself that you can do it. sort it to yearly, monthly, and daily to do lists! it’s always the best thing to look at when there are times where you don’t feel like you did “enough”. your effort is more than enough!

and so you take a few days to rest. relaxing, taking a vacation… does this mean you’re being inconsistent? absolutely… not. duh? resting is being productive. putting yourself first IS self care! reward yourself with relaxing days spent by traveling, resting, going out etc. do what makes you happy and be safe. keeping a balance is SUPER important!

“take things slow with yourself. if your body wants to rest, let it rest. let your mind rest as well by letting go all the worries of “why you’re not active”. who cares if you take a slow day? do you know how much you’ve been through? the least you can do for yourself is be comfortable in your own bed without a care in the world. you’ve experienced enough guilt. let yourself be free knowing that you deserve to rest. you deserve moments of stillness. enjoy the now. it’s all we have. we’re not always meant to be up and running. we simply weren’t made that way. there is beauty in stillness, peace, and quiet. don’t put it to shame. instead, let your mind, body, and soul experience more of it.

do things at your own pace. if you think you can get up, brush your teeth and that’s all that you can do for the day, so be it. don’t force yourself to do things you can’t handle. you’ll be doing more harm than good. take it day by day. add an extra task as days go on. do something you believe will be fulfilling like going on a quick walk around the block, going to the store to get a drink, baking a treat, sitting outside for a few minutes at a time.”

— blushydior in be kind to yourself. healing is a journey.

      𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐔

read this with conviction: 

“as of this very moment, i am leaving my old and undesired self behind; the past mistakes, the unhealthy habits, how i used to treat myself and the way i allowed others to treat me, and all the pain i have held on to for so long. it’s all gone now. even if i may or may not have a clear vision of the dream person i am now embodying, i will remain open minded and brave into learning and growing each and everyday. i am not my past mistakes nor my trauma. i’m safe and secure now. and because i’m aware of my infinite power of having full control of my reality, i am rewriting my story.”

you are not your past mistakes. you are not the negative words you have been told. you are who you want to be. everything in your world holds absolutely no meaning unless you assign it meaning thus, giving it power. turn a blind eye to things that don’t serve you, put yourself first and watch how you will bloom vibrantly. 

      𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅.

NOTHING IS OUT OF REACH. everything you want is already within you, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. 

GIVE PERFECT A MEANING OF YOUR OWN! you are still an it girl if you make mistakes, you are still a healthy, recovering person with a few very tough days this week.

you are perfect for:

taking it easy 

always trying your best even if it doesn’t feel like it

making a mistake and learning from it

telling yourself: “i had a tough day today but it’s okay! i’m going to rest and take it easy. i’m okay. i am always doing my best. there’s nothing to worry about. tomorrow will be an amazing day.”

allowing yourself to cry, feel, and express your thoughts and emotions

putting your need first

using fear as an opportunity to grow

                YOU ARE PERFECT LIKE YOU.

             REMEMBER: THIS IS A JOURNEY

you will grow at your own pace naturally.

don’t compare yourself to others, they too had a past and obstacles to overcome (and still do!) to get where they are at right now. 

don’t rush into things, handling more than you could at once.

don’t beat yourself up for not knowing certain things earlier. everyone learns and realizes things differently. 

this is not a race, there’s no routine that is supposed to be one size fits all. this is a self paced journey. you will realize and see things at a different perspective as events unfold, you will outgrow the people around you and the bad habits as you find yourself at a more stable chapter in your life. don’t rush, don’t compare, just keep looking forward.

               𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

i have fully embodied my definition of a dream girl/boy/person.

i carry myself with full confidence and elegance.

there is not a day that goes by where i don’t do my best. 

i’m beautiful, intelligent, hardworking, kind, and gentle.

i am the best version of myself.

success is inevitable for me. i am successful at everything i do.

i have all of my desired qualities.

i become better and better each and every day!

my self awareness increases every second. i have the most perfect mental diet.

it’s so easy for me to persist in new and beneficial thoughts. flipping thoughts is just way too easy.

i am in full control of my reality. i am fully aware of my potential and i will never let anything or anyone affect me.

“A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.”

— Zen Shin

☆ here is the google doc (and better) version! ☆

[the-orion-scribe]

A review of Return to the Bunker

So, a new fan episode has been released - Return to the Bunker - and that's like the newest hot topic in the Gravity Falls fandom ever since the launch of the Gravity Falls vinyl. For those who haven't watched it, below is the link to the episode.

I note that initial reception has been mixed, particularly the portrayal of Ford in this episode and especially the ending. Now, some of the criticisms are understandable, and the writing could see further polishing. But I find it's a great piece of fanwork with a lot of effort put into it.

Note: Spoilers are ahead for those who have not yet watched the episode.

There are certainly echoes of the wackiness of the original show. Not only in terms of the supernatural, but how various plot points and elements introduced eventually come together. Especially the suggestions by the others on how to tackle the Shapeshifter, and the hints of setting up a date between the two monsters featured. It attempts to balance all the new details both sweet and significant, including the Journal sweaters and the Heartstomper.

The episode also showcases two main things I'm sure the fandom wished to see in the canon - Ford and Mabel bonding, and Wendy also playing a more active role in the story (such as calling out Ford for his actions). It's a neat idea of Mabel being on board with a mystery this time. And we also have a side plot of Stan trying to go on a monster hunt with Dipper. I wish the latter part is expanded more, nevertheless.

I might agree with a few people Ford is rather unlikeable in this story... but at least he's not downright unpleasant, just unfamiliar when associating with others. I mean, this took place before Weirdmagaddeon and right after he returned to their world. At this point in canon, he usually gets along well with Dipper and rarely interacts with the others beyond interviewing them (in the Journal) and tasking them for other matters (like Mabel to find unicorns in The Last Mabelcorn).

He does have reasons to be paranoid and jumpy when they first entered since he's unaware of their first trip... though I thought Dipper would have mentioned it. And him being unwilling to trust others is something he even talked to himself about in Journal 3, though it's more that he's afraid he's a danger to others too, especially with the threat of Bill on the horizon. I might agree though that he's too dismissive of Mabel early on in this story. Nevertheless, I like that this fan episode addresses his main faults not touched much upon in the show, including his trust issues, his favouritism towards Dipper, and his ego.

The ending, when Ford memory wipes the group, is truthfully the most emotional scene of this episode. But I agree with some others it's still too contrived to explain away why the others have no memory or recall of this incident and absolves Mabel of responsibility when it comes to Dipper and Mabel vs The Future (for her to forget about the Rift featured in this story).

I guess they (the writers) added that so that it would fit in the canon, though personally I struggled where it could be (like, I doubt it would take the place of Roadside Attraction since Ford would be indebted to Mabel for retrieving some unicorn hair, and his attitude towards her seems rather out of place). Honestly, the end erases Ford's character's growth in trusting people. I understand character growth isn't linear, but I'm just saddened Ford decides to go down this route, which leaves darker implications especially with his interactions with said characters later on in the canon, particularly Mabel. It makes Ford seem very... manipulative. Or at least only experiencing regret for his brother's memory loss in the finale.

I just want to add on a tangent that I personally think not having Mabel and Ford directly interact much in the canon pre-WMG is also crucial to the fallout we see in Dipper and Mabel Vs the Future. That Ford overlooked Mabel and Dipper's bond and thought Mabel would be fine by herself. Not to say that Ford is uncaring, but I think he underestimated the bond she has with her brother.

But overall, I think the heart and idea behind this episode are good. Plenty of plot elements could be better handled and thought out, but even for its flaws, it might fit as a proper GF episode. This is really like the best thing from fans who aren't even paid, and took out their time, effort and money to create this for us. Some people have too many expectations for a fan-made episode, especially one taking place in an already crammed timeline between A Tale of Two Stans and Weirdmagaddeon. Is it contrived? Sure, but that can be said for like plenty of GF episodes. Given it also wants to fit into the canon, I guess it did its best to retcon what it could.

Anyway, this isn't canon, so folks can just relax and enjoy.