#it's not like you can just steal his contracts lol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

il-miele-che-scrive · 3 months

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Please have your asks open okay so hear me out

Charles Leclerc x Greek ! F1 driver ! Reader

You can choose the brand anything Ferrari because I want it to be like a little rivalry to lovers . Social media au or not . Reader being in f1 more time than Charles or Charles with rookie reader .

Thank you in advance

Hello!! I decided to go with rookie reader, hoping you'll like it❤️🙏

scuderiaferrari We are thrilled to announce a historic moment in Formula 1 as we welcome Y/n Y/l/n to our racing family! 🚀 Introducing Y/n Y/l/n, the first woman to compete in F1 since the iconic Lella Lombardi in 1976, and proudly representing Greece! 🇬🇷 Teaming up with our Charles Leclerc, Y/n brings a fresh wave of skill, determination and passion to the track. Together they'll conquer the 2024 season with the iconic Prancing Horse🐎

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yourusername I feel extremely honored to become a part of this family❤️

username1 Miss girl has no idea what she signed up for 💀 wishing her all the best tho

username2 A GIRL, GUYS WE FINALLY GOT A GIRL IN F1

username3 I have a bad feeling about this...

↳username1 wtf? care to explain?

username3 By the summer break she'll have hooked up with half the grid

username1 bye I'm not even participating in this conversation, misogynistic brain rot

carlossainz55 Goodluck @/yourusername 💪

↳yourusername Thank you Carlos 🙏

↳username4 Help why does his comment seem kinda salty

username2 wdym salty lol he literally wished her goodluck

username5 I get him tho, a girl stole his seat

username2 what "stealing" are you talking about? his contract expired, they didn't prolong it and went with some fresh blood that happened to be a woman, not to mention you have to be like the best of the best to get into F1, there was def no stealing done

charles_leclerc Exciting times ahead, let's see if you can keep up

↳yourusername Buckle up 🤠

↳username2 now THAT'S what I'd call a salty comment

username5 Charles forgot they're on the same team lol

achi_of_greece Hellenic Hurricane 🌪

↳yourusername I'll never escape from this nickname will I? 🫶

↳username1 NOT Y/N HAVING LITERAL ROYALTY UNDER A POST ABOUT HER

↳username3 Let's see if the hellenic hurricane can keep up with Lighting McQueen

username4 keep up? 🤡 miss girl will beat his ass up

username5 once again, i kindly remind, they are a TEAM!

lewishamilton History in the making

↳yourusername Omg sir Lewis Hamilton I'm gonna cry 🥹

username1 Y/n being a fangirl just like us

username4 she's so real for this frfr

oscarpiastri Finally🥴it was a bit lonely

↳yourusername Hi f2 bestie 🫶

logansargeant What about me

yourusername you know Oscar and I love you!!

f1 A historic day at the Imola Circuit as Y/n Y/l/n, the Hellenic Hurricane, wins the Emilia Romagna Grand Prix! Congratulations to Y/n and the entire Ferrari team for this outstanding performance.

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yourusername A dream come true honestly 😭🙏

↳carlossainz55 Great job👏

↳lewishamilton So proud

↳username4 Someone explain why the 7 (8)times WC and Charles' ex teammate are more supportive than Charles himself

username2 I think it might be an ego thing? He could be jealous? Personally I think it's Ferrari's fault, they kinda messed up the friendship between CL and CS too at the end

username5 yeah Y/n is definitely the 'favorite child' to Ferrari because she's new and they want to focus more on her or smth

maxverstappen1 Well deserved

↳yourusername THANK YOU MAX

↳username6 Why is Max here and Charles is not😭

username1 A GIRL. IN FERRARI. WINNING IN ITALY. I WASN'T READY FOR THIS

username2 The haters are pretty quiet rn

username4 No cuz I was gonna ask if she found a therapist yet... But she might not need it

username6 Excuse me it's been a few weeks and we get a Y/n win already?? I love it here

landonorris Max Verstappen is screaming crying throwing up

↳maxverstappen1 I'm literally not

landonorris You must admit it was refreshing not having to listen to the Dutch anthem again

oscarpiastri Best rookie fr

↳yourusername I learn from the best (even though you didn't have a win in your rookie year)

oscarpiastri Wdym i didn't, i won sprint in Qatar. Not to mention rookie of the year

yourusername Yeah yeah, stop flexing pookie

logansargeant Go bestie

↳yourusername Can't fvck with these hoes cuz they messy 💅

username7 live laugh love Y/n

username1 the Verstappen curse has ended🙏

↳username3 you know it's probs her first and last victory in F1 right?

username1 I just wonder why is Charles so quiet

charles_leclerc Congrats 👍

↳username7 not Charles commenting after people started to wonder why he didn't say anything 😭

↳yourusername How did you enjoy looking at the back of my car? Oh wait, you couldn't even see it from P8

username1 maybe it was better when Charles didn't comment 💀

username3 if that was how my teammate talks to me I'd be pissed too

username1 if this is angrily my name is Ayrton Senna

username2 pls if he was angry, it was only cuz he's in love with her but can't do anything about it

↳username3 he can, they're both single, if he wanted he would've, but he knows they have to keep it professional

username2 that's why I said he can't do anything, literally. i predict a relationship the moment one of them leaves ferrari (or f1 in general)

username4 dude is so in love it's embarrassing

username5 I just know he's thinking about unholy things

↳username7 angry sex lmao imagine

username6 oh to have someone who'll look at me the same way Charles looks at Y/n

username7 okay so my theory is they're attracted to each other okay? but neither of them can talk about emotions, but they tried to have a talk about it, which turned into an argument cuz both are short tempered pookies

↳username3 this is so delusional 🤡 why would they talk about it in that exact moment?

username7 let a girl fantasize

↳username5 quietly manifesting this to be true

↳username2 I'll never believe in true love if this doesn't turn out to be real

username8 No cuz hear me out guys. The LONGING gaze in the second picture? There is chemistry between them whether they admit it or not

↳username6 I totally see it, that is the stare of a man in love with the woman he's just argued with. Look at him. He doesn't look angry. He looks upset. Why? Because they had this argument and didn't make up. Now he's worried they'll get in the cars and something bad will happen either to him or Y/n and... You can imagine how the rest goes

username3 And i thought the previous person was delulu wtf

username9 I can die happily the day I see CharlesY/n happen

↳username7 be careful what you wish for, I feel like it can happen sooner than we'd expect

username10 I need to know HOW didn't Y/n fold after being looked at like this

username11 My friend went to Monaco for the GP and she has a paddock pass, she told me she overheard Y/n talk to some girl from her team that she liked Charles AND they even had "THE talk"™ (which could mean they did "IT"?), but Y/n can't imagine a relationship with him

↳username3 out of all the things that didn't happen, this didn't happen the most

↳username1 I can see that, they're very similar - competitive, short tempered - each of them is like a ticking bomb alone, so in a romantic relationship they would be truly a nuclear weapon (which doesn't mean I don't want it to happen)

yourusername A great day for some karting 🥴 summer break!

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username1 did I gaslight myself that hard or she's really in the number 16?

↳username5 nah, I see that too

↳username2 girlie giving us hints, is it soft launching yet?

username2 16 I'M SCREAMING

username4 enemies to lovers?

↳username3 when were they enemies?

username4 well they never seemed very fond of each other

username3 then just say rivals 💀

charles_leclerc You forgot to mention I won this time

↳yourusername first and last time you got a higher place than me

username4 I can see them having "the winner gets to be on top" kinda bets

↳landonorris 👀

username1 LANDO KNOWS SOMETHING

username11 i told yall, there's too much tension between Y/n and Charles to not be AT LEAST fuck buddies

oscarpiastri What's the longest you can go without being on track?

↳yourusername Mate as I'm writing this I'm waiting for a plane home, won't sit behind the wheel for like a week or more 😭

↳username2 Y/n is dedicated to her job

yourusername είσαι η αγάπη μου❤️🤍

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username1 the red and white hearts?? just saying but they're colors of the Monaco flag

↳username2 and the guy lowkey looks like Charles🤔

username3 looks like Charles? The best you can see is the back of his head

username2 and it looks exactly like Charles' 😌

francisca.cgomes Where credits for the last pic?

↳username4 KIKA WHAT ARE U DOING HERE

↳yourusername Pierre said not to tag either of you 😭 safety reasons or something 🙄

username4 AND PIERRE IS THERE?

username3 Okay, she's in a relationship, y'all can stop shipping Charles with her

↳username5 wdym 💀 this is literally Charles

username3 And y'all say that based on the back of his head, delusional

oscarpiastri @/landonorris and I want an invitation next time

↳yourusername Sorry pookie, it's not for kids

landonorris I'm not a kid

yourusername Then don't act like one

username5 lmao Ferrari had no idea they're getting a sassy queen

username6 Y/n is in love 🥹

↳username2 She's winning, she's in love, what else could a girl want?

username7 Not the soft launch as if we didn't know it's literally her teammate

username1 WHAT.

username2 I TOLD YOU. I TOLD YOU.

username3 You know it's totally normal for friends to hang out? I'd take it as they finally made up

↳username2 UP OR OUT

↳username4 they totally look like just friends, sure😐

username5 IN HER HOMETOWN 😭 HE MET HER FAMILY

↳username7 I'm super curious how it went. "Mom, dad, this is Charles my teammate, I hate his guts. Oh, and we're also lovers"

username6 So where is the person who said they can die happily when CharlesY/n turns out to be real?

↳username2 dead probs lmao

username7 The power couple we needed 😭

username8 imagine their PR team lurking onto gossip pages seeing this

↳username1 I know FOR A FACT that the pr people do look at the gossip accounts

username9 Y'all remember how once someone said Y/n will hook up with half the grid? Staring with the teammate is easy, let's see who'll be next

↳username3 Yeah, I'm so surprised it didn't happen earlier

↳username2 stay mad lol Y/n is living her best life with the man she loves

username5 THIS and it doesn't matter that they met through being on the same team

username6 They knew each other before tho! Y/n used to be friends with Arthur, so she def met Charles in the past

username3 Oh so she tried to get with Arthur but because it didn't work out she went for Charles?

username6 That's literally not what I said. She was friends with Arthur. FRIENDS

username3 You know there's no such thing as friendship between a man and a woman?

username6 look at who is delulu now 🤡 I'm not having this conversation

charles_leclerc Partners on and off the track

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username1 Man literally said fuck a soft launch 😭

↳username2 as he should! we've been dying for them to announce it

yourusername Je t'aime 🩷

↳charles_leclerc Je t'aime avec tes défauts et tes qualités

yourusername EXCUSE ME

yourusername DO YOU THINK I CANT USE TRANSLATOR?

yourusername WHAT "DÉFAUTS" YOU MEAN? I HAVE NO DÉFAUTS

charles_leclerc That's adorable ❤️

pierregasly Remind me, who took the first photo? 🤔

↳yourusername Kika did 🫶 @/francisca.cgomes

francisca.cgomes First and foremost I am the biggest CharlesY/n fan

pierregasly But you took the pic with my phone, I am the author just as much 🙄

francisca.cgomes No❤️

landonorris OH

landonorris I thought you won't have the balls to hard launch

↳yourusername The balls are there indeed

yourusername And more

landonorris EWWWW TMI

yourusername 😐

landonorris exactly my face rn

oscarpiastri So that's why Lando and I weren't invited

↳yourusername It's a couples trip 🤷‍♀️ there wasn't space for the Aussie and his emotional support extrovert

oscarpiastri fuck Lando, what about the Aussie and his GIRLFRIEND?

oscarpiastri Because I do have a girlfriend, you know?

landonorris HEY that's mean

logansargeant I can't say I didn't see it coming

↳username1 We all did, Logan

↳yourusername You were literally the first person I told about my crush on Charles...

logansargeant But who said I believed it would work out?

oscarpiastri HE was the first to know?

yourusername And you were the first to know about the night Charles spent in my hotel room in Monaco

charles_leclerc You talk to them about these things, chérie?

yourusername Don't act like you didn't run to Lando to tell him all about it on the next day

username4 So the theories were real after all, the spicy night in Y/n's hotel room was the cause of their argument

↳username3 She didn't say that...

username4 But it's obvious. Look - the night happened, they felt weird about it and boom there goes the argument. It makes a lot of sense

username5 However it happened, I'm glad it happened

username6 What happens now? Are they even allowed to be a couple?

↳username7 wdym allowed lol it's better than if they were from different teams, they'd have to sign NDA or something

username6 Isn't the team worried they'll distract each other or something?

username7 At least they'll be traumatized together

scuderiaferrari 🇬🇷❤️🇲🇨

↳username6 The team is indeed not worried

yourusername The benefits of having birthday during the summer break

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username1 I love the Y/n and Charles/Kika and Pierre friend group

↳username2 they're everything I want fr

username4 okay but I NEED to know whose idea the cake was

↳username2 I would expect it from Logan and Oscar, honestly, but they weren't in Greece with them

↳yourusername ofc it was Kika's idea!!

francisca.cgomes and I'm proud of it

logansargeant It hurts to know you're making new friends 🙄

↳yourusername I figured I needed some girl friend after spending so much time with you and Oscar 🙄

logansargeant Do you even remember about us anymore?

oscarpiastri I bet 10 of your american dollars that she doesn't

yourusername how could I forget? You two still haunt me in my nightmares 🫶

username1 lmao Charles wakes up screaming box box and Y/n wakes up screaming what's a kilometer and shoe thongs 😭

yourusername that's an accurate description

charles_leclerc I swear I once heard you talk in your sleep something about running a mile in shoe thongs

yourusername And I don't even know how long a mile is, so you can only imagine how terrifying that was

lewishamilton Happy birthday to my favorite rookie

↳yourusername Every time you appear in my comment section I cry a little

lewishamilton The good tears I hope?

yourusername happiness tears of course😭

username5 Do y'all think Charles is jealous seeing his gf interact with THE Lewis Hamilton?

↳username2 No? Why? Lewis is Y/n's idol so obviously she's gonna fangirl a lil

username6 Y/n being a WAG and a driver at the same time, iconic

username7 My fav wag duo for real

#f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #formula 1 x reader #charles leclerc x reader #f1 smau #f1 social media au #Charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc imagine #Charles leclerc smau #Charles leclerc social media au

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loquatenjoyer69 · 28 days

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Matoba and Burden and Desire

I originally watched/read Natsuyuu back in fall of 2022, and then a few months ago, literally out of nowhere, my brain was like “Hey, remember that loquat story Matoba told in that one arc? It felt like there was something there, let’s go reread that,” which I did, and have been in hexorcists hell about ever since.

(pictured: a sane person’s reaction to reading natsuyuu)

And really, that’s it. The loquat story feels like there’s something there, but I couldn’t quite figure out what was going on. But after my close rereading of that arc, I think I’ve at least come to one coherent conclusion about it, even if it’s perhaps the most basic one: I think the loquats are an allegory for the greater themes of burden/desire in this arc. The following is my attempt to lay out my thoughts, but unfortunately I have never been known for my conciseness or my ability to organize my thoughts, so be forewarned. This will be rambly and include a few tangents/too much detail.

The story of the Miharu family is a story of a family that was once respected, had a relationship/contract with powerful ayakashi, and eventually fell into ruin, leaving behind their contracts. The ayakashi, the mihashira, still come to uphold their part of the agreement without fail, but the family is gone. So who comes in their place to maintain the contract? The Matobas, and in the present day, the current head of the Matoba clan is Matoba Seiji. In order to maintain this deal with a group of powerful youkai, which neither he nor his family actually made, Matoba has to come and perform the welcoming ritual to avoid incurring the wrath of the mihashira.

Matoba is a character marked by burden, I think. Though he is the head of the most powerful exorcist clan, and therefore one might expect that he can pretty much do what he wants, I don’t actually think he has much personal freedom. The only son of the main family, he was probably marked as the heir from birth (if not, he would have had to be once his sister left but I still need to read 120+ so I don’t know exactly what the deal with her is). The clan’s interests are his interests. He can’t do anything that might hurt the reputation of or endanger the clan, and he is obligated to do things that benefit the clan. Matoba is Matoba.

In chapter 25, in his debut arc, he tells Natsume 「使えるものは使わないと。人を守る為に、強い妖が欲しいと思っているだけですよ。その為には恨まれたり代償を払うことを気にしていたら、この家業はやっていけませんしね」

"One should make use of useful things. I just want ayakashi in order to protect people. If I was worried about being hated or suffering consequences, I could not carry on the family business,"

(this is actually one of those annoying instances of a Japanese sentence that’s more dense than would sound good in English. Matoba seems to be explaining his personal worldview/thoughts here with 思っている even though in English you’d never say “I just feel like/think I want strong ayakashi…” He’s explaining that this is the way he thinks, I think lol).

Matoba doesn’t get the privilege of having a good reputation among humans or ayakashi, since we learn in special chapter 17 that no good ayakashi will make deals with the Matobas because of their famous broken promise. Matoba Seiji not only inherits the burden of monthly eye-stealing visits, he also can’t make contracts with ayakashi and takes on all the distrust that’s built up over generations from both humans and ayakashi.

And now Matoba is taking on the debts of a dead branch family to avoid possibly endangering his own.

In the locked room, when Matoba is goading Natori into breaking them out, he says 「どうです？あなたには解くことができますか名取。無理ならばすべて私が片付けてさしあげましょうか？」

"Well, can you do it, Natori? If you can’t, shall I take care of everything for you?"

I’m unsure how much of this is Matoba teasing Natori (as he seems to like doing in the Homura arc) about how he’s not as powerful/skilled as Matoba, and how much is him simply making an offer because he’s Matoba and he’s The One Who Takes Care Of Everything. I think either way, there is at least a good amount of the latter going on here.

In special chapter 17, Matoba shows up at Natori’s house and helps him exorcise the ayakashi that’s been haunting him. After Natori wakes up, he tries to offer to help Matoba in some way. I think he felt uncomfortable being the only one being helped, and wanted to find something he could offer Matoba, even though Matoba seems to have everything he needs. Natori offers to listen to his problems, and Matoba smiles (of course) and says he’s fine. Even teenage Matoba is like “You’re not the one who helps me, I’m the one who helps you.” Though this chapter is from Natori’s perspective, so Natori believes Matoba was just using him to get an ayakashi, I’m not sure that’s true. I don’t know for sure what Matoba’s motives were, but I don’t believe teenage Natori is an unbiased observer of him lol.

Now that we’ve laid all that out, let’s talk briefly about the Miharus, a once respected family who made a deal with ayakashi they didn’t understand, and fell into ruin. According to the ayakashi who wants to sabotage the ritual, there was a member of the Miharu family called Masakiyo. Masakiyo was stern for the most part, but there was someone he loved. However, he couldn’t be with that person because he couldn’t make them shoulder the burdens of his family business, but neither could he simply abandon his family. He had to stay with his family and let this person go. This was the only time this ayakashi saw Masakiyo cry. Then we get this panel:

(pictured: bench of I Hate My Life, credit to @joelletwo for that lol)

In his despair, Masakiyo wished there was no Miharu family. The ayakashi, feeling indebted to Masakiyo for letting it go during an exorcism, overhears him and decides that destroying the Miharu family will bring Masakiyo happiness. This is an unintended contract between the two of them. Masakiyo unwittingly causes an ayakashi to spend years (decades?) trying in vain to destroy his family in order to repay a perceived debt. This isn’t Masakiyo’s fault, really, it was just an unfortunate misunderstanding. The ayakashi didn’t understand that Masakiyo wanted it to be free and live the life he couldn’t. “You were almost exorcised because of human circumstances. You were saved on the whim of a human. What debt? You are free. Go wherever you want. Live however you want.”

After all the mihashira business is wrapped up, Matoba thanks Natori for his help, Natori says he probably couldn’t have gotten out of the room without Matoba, and Matoba laughs and says “Then we’re even this time.” Neither one is indebted to the other this time…they’re even. Then Natori says The Line:

「何かを継ぎ背負っていく…その真の重みは私などにははかり知れません。でも今はこう思うようにもなりました。重いものもひとりでなければと…」

"I don’t know the true weight of shouldering a burden you’ve inherited, but now I’ve come to think that even heavy things can be carried if you’re not alone,"

(this is another one of the aforementioned Dense Japanese Sentences, and I really prefer the fan TL version of this line but I’m translating it this way to try to convey all the stuff he’s saying). Natori once again reaches out to Matoba, trying to offer him maybe the only thing he can: support, listening to his problems, shouldering his burdens. This time, though, we don’t get a Matoba Smile and “I’m fine,” we get this:

(pictured: Matoba on the bench of I Hate My Life, or “Matoba Cow Beach” as I refer to this image in my head)

What is Matoba thinking here? I really don’t know. If I draw the obvious parallel with Masakiyo, I guess he’s contemplating his two…selves, as it were. His duty to his family vs his personal desire for companionship. And I do think Matoba wants companionship. I read his behavior in special chapter 15 as genuinely wanting to be friends with Natori. I think he was excited that there was someone else his age who was relatively powerful, and who wasn’t concerned with all the Matoba stuff. Hence his insistence on Natori calling him Seiji. He wanted to be close to Natori.

And finally, we can come back to the loquats. Natsume hears Matoba mocking the mihashira for continuing to protect the Miharu house even after the family has all died out, and thinks perhaps Matoba is envious of ayakashi who go to such great lengths to keep promises.

"Matoba-san, who keeps breaking promises, and doesn’t have anyone to make new ones with."

Matoba wonders how the welcoming ritual will go next time, but decides he won’t worry since he probably won’t even be the head of the clan at that time. Natsume offers him a loquat, saying cheer up, and Matoba does his Thing, saying “How odd, do I look upset?” and then tells The Story.

When Matoba was a teenager, he really wanted to try the loquats from Yorishima’s yard. One day, he was there with Natori, and Yorishima gave them both one. The loquat was delicious and sweet; Matoba felt that his “desire had been fulfilled,” but Natori got a sour one, and Matoba felt like Yorishima-san had wanted to give a loquat to Natori, and only given one to Matoba because he was there, so he thought “Ah there’s no winning even in such a small thing as this.” Matoba gets what he wants, but it wasn’t meant for him, and the one it was meant for is worse off, so did he really win? He was the only one who got to enjoy the delicious loquat. These are the unintended consequences, the burdens if you will, of desire.

Natsume speculates that the agreement with the mihashira began when someone had the wish to protect the Miharu family, and there was an ayakashi who happened to be there, much like the situation with Masakiyo and the sabotaging ayakashi. A simple and innocent wish accidentally creates a generations-long burden that Matoba eventually has to shoulder.

I think Matoba must be painfully aware of his power and influence, and that even his smallest actions could cause unintended consequences. I wonder if he sees the Miharu family as a warning of what could happen to his own family if he slips up… And it wasn’t just a mistake on the part of the Miharus, but a failure of the Matoba clan head of that time, whose responsibility it was to look out for the branch families. Matoba Seiji is not just responsible for the success of his own family, but protecting the branch families, and of course non-exorcists as well. I imagine he feels like he doesn’t have the time or room to act on any of his own personal desires, and his little loquat anecdote is evidence of that, to me. It’s bittersweet (lol). And Natori’s takeaway, meanwhile, is more casual as you might expect. When Natsume asks him if he likes loquats, he says he’s not sure because his first one wasn’t very good. To Natori, a loquat is something he might try again and like. To Matoba, it’s a reminder of what he can and can’t have.

#natsume yuujinchou #matoba seiji #really sorry this is so long and i'm sure i could cut it down. i am bad at that.#i hope i ended up saying something though lol #i want to try to write more thoughts about other stuff #hopefully if i do it more I'll get better #my meta

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sammunmak · 3 months

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Specs & Max Freelance Police in: Hells-A-Poppin'!

+ sam’s vices !!

this is basically an au idea i had for the alt timeline! i wrote out all the changes to the first two seasons, but it's a bit on the longer side so i'm sticking it under the cut.

this takes place immediately after sam and max steal the elevator from their future selves. there’s no obvious changes at first. the director gives them another contract after telling her they misplaced the first one, but not without threat of not giving them another one if they manage to misplace this one. once they wrap up the case and free myra stump from the hypnosis, they take the elevator (and their music contract) with them and put it away in storage, vowing to never speak of the possibility that they just killed their future selves again. ah well, knowing themselves, they probably survive. everything else afterwards is pretty much the same, though when sam and max see superball for the first time sam asks max if he looks familiar. max takes one look at him and proudly declares nope, not at all, and that’s the end of that.

the first major change happens in 106.

hugh: for in all the universe, there’s only one force chaotic and destructive enough to stop me now! but you wouldn’t do that, would you max?

max: who, ME? well, i’m- i’m flattered, but-

hugh: no you wouldn’t, not without your trusty partner, at least.

max: huh?

sam: what exactly are you implying?

hugh: i’m going to… drumroll, please… [drumroll] separate your bliss!

max: really?

sam: what does that even mean?!

hugh: it means i chop off every part of you i don’t like! it’s like circumcision, but double the laughs.

max: he-ey!

sam: quiet, knucklehead.

sam gets split into 3 vices. gluttony, greed, and wrath. wrath is formed from sam’s right ear, greed is formed from sam’s left hand (it even keeps the wedding band!), and gluttony is formed from. well, the stomach. max loses all romantic interest he had in hugh bliss in that moment.

max is very annoyed about the whole situation. he never has to do work on their cases, and suddenly he’s being forced to figure everything out on his own! but seeing sam’s awful blissed-out state is worse. blissed-out sam is basically just a big puppy. all smiles, completely clueless about everything around him, and has to be led around by his remaining hand if max wants him to go anywhere. max considers shooting him every time he makes a comment about hugging trees or something sentimental crap like that, but one look at that big dopey grin on sam’s face and he just can’t do it. he needs to turn sam back quickly, he’s turning into a sap just being near this… shell of his partner.

wrath is in the sanctuary, threatening the COPS for information on max’s whereabouts (yes it’s just noir sam lol). when max and bliss sam finally make their appearance, wrath almost immediately tries to shoot bliss sam. max stops it, of course. it seems like max is the only person wrath won’t lash out against. max has to open one of bluster blaster’s side panels, then get wrath close enough to it to shut the panel on his ear, pulling it off wrath when it tries freeing itself.

once sam gets his ear back, he seems to randomly decide to shoot at max.

max: what was that for?!

sam: i dunno, it just felt right.

when max walks into bosco’s store, he immediately makes eye contact with gluttony sam, who’s sitting on the floor eating a giant tub of ice cream. it doesn’t seem very interested in eating actual people (haha foreshadowing?) in the freezer are a bunch of popsicles. max can grab one and give it to gluttony, who’ll chomp it down wrapper and all. max has to put jimmy two-teeth into one of the wrappers in order to get gluttony to eat him, then pull out jimmy and sam’s stomach with the magic hat.

sam: anyone else suddenly got a hankerin’ for a fudgie freeze?

max: you don’t know how glad i am to hear you say those words.

greed is inside the office, hoarding just about everything in there and more. somehow there’s items in here max didn’t even know they had. or maybe greed just grabbed everything not bolted down to the floor on the way back to the office.

max has to buy bosco’s invention (which is just a big magnet), then use the spoon bending talisman to pull the spork out of the hugh bliss statue’s hand, give it to greed, and then use the magnet to drag its ass towards him and just yank sam’s hand off it.

sam: are you using that magnet?

max: nope! it’s all yours.

upon collecting all 3 vices, sam returns to normal, and they can now go fight hugh bliss. cue world of max :)

not much else changes until 204.

once they enter momma bosco’s store and accidentally reveal max’s lack of interest in girls, momma bosco becomes infatuated with him. sam and max try and argue against this for a while, until max tells her that he’s a married man.

ms b: i don’t see a ring on your finger.

max: well check again!

max flashes his left hand, revealing a bare ring finger. oh. he didn’t put on his ring today. sam is missing his ring as well. seems they got a bit excited when flint invited them on a case with him and forgot them.

(not gonna lie this whole puzzle isnt fully fleshed out. the whole plan would be that they have to go back to their prom and essentially crash it in order to help max realize he doesn’t like girls. i did also have the idea of superball printing marriage certificates instead of patents, which they’d need to grab one from him and hang it on the corkboard in the near future, then go to the distant future and take their wedding rings from their future selves. if i do ever have an idea of how exactly this all pans out i’ll make it into a fic or something. for now tho this is the best i could come up with.)

max is very proud to show off his new wedding ring to momma bosco.

later on, sam is glad he kept that music contract on him, once one of the pedros asks for one.

of course, despite keeping their past selves from boarding the UFO, the elevator is still oddly enough missing when they run back to it.

max: hey, the elevator’s gone! what gives?

sam: hmm… remember what got us into this whole mess, the temporal anomalies and whatnot? maybe it’s another one of those? maybe this is the universe’s way of trying to correct the timeline, and we have to leave the same way our future selves did, since we’re-

max: alright, alright! less talky more- figuring out how to get off this dang ship!

ah well, having two elevators seems a bit overkill anyway.

not so long later, in 205:

sam: you better release our pals’ souls from hell, cause my excitable little friend is getting angry.

max: and i’m angry, too!

satan: there’s no need for that kind of talk. i’ll gladly release your friends. just sign this release.

max: hold on sam, i got this!

sam: …you sure, max?

max: positive! watch this. [he pulls out a crayon and scribbles his name on the contract]

satan: and that’s that.

sam: well that was pretty easy.

satan: now just do me a favor and think of the most horrible thing you can imagine.

max: ooh, that might take a second, there’s so many- oh, maybe- wait no, i’ve got it!

satan: good. now off you go!

[max disappears]

sam: sweet summering sausages sweltering on a busy sidewalk, what did you do?!

satan: he traded his soul for that of all your friends. they never read the fine print. now max will spend eternity in his own personal hell!

max: back in the office? where’s my partner?

specs: i’m over here!

max finds himself stuck inside a now very tidy office with specs, the neat freak of the soda poppers.

max: so where’s my REAL partner?

specs: what are you talking about, i AM your real partner.

max: uh, no. last i checked my partner was a six foot tall dog in a suit, not… you.

specs: oh, max. clearly you’re confused. you’ve always had a terrible memory. but don’t worry, i’m here to keep everything in order for you.

max is just about ready to start ripping out patches of his fur when he sees sam, sticking his big nose through the hole in their office wall. after a bit of arguing, max remembers the key card. he yells at sam to use it so they can kick demon’s spec’s ass together. when sam gets in there they do just that, ending in sam throwing the demon out the open window. with max’s personal hell defeated and leonard’s soul free they leave and finally go and confront satan.

as a bonus, a fun change to a piece of dialogue in 201:

sam: how long do you think it’ll take for one of us to kick the bucket?

max: i dunno, but i think if one of us were to go, the other would follow very close behind. maybe not even by choice!

sam: does that mean if i go first, i can take you with me?

max: sure does! in fact, i encourage it!

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daze4all · 5 months

Text

Host Club AU Reader Series: Host! Dan Heng, Blade, Jing Yuan, Loucha, Gepard, Sampo

Smoky room and a sweet scent, golden tasseled curtains and a plush velvet loveseat spread out.

In a room where handsome men beckon you into the jazz filled space.

For a moment to forget your worries and relax

Which Host would you like to request milady?

youtube

3 Takes on This Reverse Harem Setting

Modern Spicy Japanese Host club Guys in Suits with Secrets issue. Stelle /Reader Manager

Comedic Ouran Highschool host Club twist with Stelle/Reader Haruhi forced to crossdress as a host Caelus!

Ancient Asian Past Brothel like Red Light district. Yoshiwara! Past life! Client! Stelle x Host forbidden love. Escape attempt. From red light district prostitution.

Alternative dark setting with forbidden love setting clients customer relations… secret romance to steal away high-class courtesan or ancient Chinese harem setting.

To get you in the mood this spicy Amv of the tall Guys in Suits by Thoma inspired me abit~

Secrets in the Host Club

Host! Dan Heng has a contract to pay from predecessor top host

Host! Dan Feng who disappeared to have baby Dan Heng due to a scandal with a client. Father-Son or twins? Scandalous~

Or they be the Hitachin Twins lol Brotherly love/ twincest for comedy value like Ourna Highscool Host Club lol.

Host! Blade abnormally obsessed with beating Dan Heng in the rankings.

Bl vibes from a past bromance Dan Feng maybe

possible amnesia but flashes of their past lives in yoshiwara maybe?

desire to beat dan heng as top host

-Blade like Mori Like tough silent guy host in OHSHC! AU

Host! Jing yuan Current top one host

been their the longest watching this drama

smugly knowing the whole stories

Wingman! Jing Yuan secretly wants Blade x Dan Heng together so he can get with manager/reader or Stelle/Caelus

Secretly some ceo or big shot being forced to marry like Tamaki souh but avoiding engagement by keeping up playboy personality by keeping up the host club.

The Tamaki Souh the King of the host club who wants his host club family to get along and be fam

Host! Loucha maybe sneaked in their as Kyoya keeps it together financially.

-Mysterious

- Spy ! Loucha Secretly undermines club

- Double Agent! Louche Maybe geos to Belobag! club and have to bring him back for ratings

- but he a double spy who was stealing belobog host sclub’s secrets

- Steals Gepard & Sampo maybes he sways them to join Xianzhou/Loufu’s Host Club Rival Planets / Clubs

Host! Gepard awkward embarrassed host.

- actually FBI Or undercover COP as sus undercover drug dealing going on.

- Guy Next door? Natural! Host like Haruhi. Or Mori tough guy.

Cop! Gepard there to To bust Host! Sampo being that Sus dealer of kinky toys not drugs lol.

Host! Flirty! Sampo Criminal Dangerous Host

Fun Host Theme nights: Yukata night, suit day, glasses day, costume day, pirate etc. other kinks ppl can comment.

Host! Stelle : Client, host/crossdressing Caelus or manager willed to take over and run host club that is suffering from a debt from scandal with top star (Dan Feng)

Breaks vase like Haruhi just student at college idk lol gets into shifty host club for rich famous lol

Or modern au or ancient red light district brothel?honkai

NanookL manager! dad of stelle? Debt lender guy have to make up deficit too for club

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wehaveimagineshere · 5 months

Note

In Act 3 if you make the deal with Raphael, Gale says "I can't believe you signed that contract. We'll discuss this. Later." Would you please do something NSFW with this as a prompt because it has me feeling things lol

You didn't specify an admin, so I - Ren - will be writing this as a scenario (: You also did not specify reader gender and pronouns, so they'll default to AFAB and she/her.

I tried finding this dialogue but had no luck! I can see why it would make you feel things cause just imagining it myself has me going 👀

~*~*~

The door clicks shut and you inhale slowly, turning your head so you can see Gale. Arms crossed, face as furious as you've ever seen it, you know you're in for the biggest tongue lashing of your life.

"Before you say anything--" you try, but he cuts you off.

"I can't believe you signed that contract! What were you thinking?"

"I--"

"I did not trek halfway across Faerûn to watch you throw your life away to a godsdamn demon. Have you not paid any attention to Wyll? To what he's had to go through?"

You turn to him fully. "Gale--"

"Don't 'Gale' me! I thought you were smarter than this! I thought--"

"Do you have any better ideas?!" you snap, throwing up your hands. "Do you? Do any of you? This gods forsaken Elder Brian is causing the entire city to shake and you think we can just win through friendship and hope?"

"I did not say that--"

"No, but you act like it! Mystra isn't coming to save us, Gale! She wants you to blow yourself up and I hate to say it, but she's the only god that has even deigned to look in our direction!" Throwing your arms wide, you give an aggravated laugh. "Raphael has given us something, a way to kill the damn thing!"

"I would rather die than see you struggle like Wyll!"

"And I would rather get played by a demon than see you turned squid!"

"Do you have any idea what Raphael can do with the crown?"

"I know what won't happen, Gale. Us turning brain eater!" You step forward. "I am trying to not only see to the end of this conflict in one piece, but to see a future beyond it! What Raphael does with the crown in Avernus doesn't matter when he can help secure a life after this!" Gesturing between you, you add, "A life for us!"

The anger pressing against the room pops at that statement. Gale's shoulders slump, pinched expression turning to something soft before he rubs a hand over his face, running fingers through his hair. You exhale heavily, feeling pressure behind your eyes but determined to not let the tears fall.

This was stupid. All of this was stupid.

Crossing to the small desk in the corner of the room, Gale presses his palms against the rough wood and exhales heavily. "It is such a dangerous game, isn't it?" His voice is quiet, reserved. "We put one foot just one centimeter to the left and we all fall to our doom."

"I just want us alive, Gale." You swallow down the tightening of your throat, the tears stinging your eyes. "I never wanted to have the fate of an old, dangerous crown in my hands. I don't have the capacity to see the consequences of what could happen hundreds of years from now. But I know if I don't do something right now, we're dead. More than dead."

"I know." His eyes are locked onto the grooves of the table. "I know."

Slowly, you move to stand behind him. Slowly, you lay a hand between his shoulder blades. "We know where Raphael keeps all his things. Including that contract."

You feel his chest expand with an inhale. "You want to steal your contract?"

"And tear it up. The object I bartered for is in there too."

Straightening, he turns to you, a range of emotions dancing in his eyes. "You are absolutely crazy. I mean, I know you've been for a while now, but..."

Looping your arms around his neck and pressing your body against his, you say softly against his lips, "Anything for our future, Gale."

A sound you've never heard before leaves his throat as he crushes his lips to yours, fingertips digging into your hips and roughly pushing them against his own. You respond in kind, nipping his bottom lip as you grind gently, smiling when you feel him through his clothing.

"You scare me, you know," he breathes, breath tickling your throat as he nips down your skin. "You're wild, and unpredictable." His teeth find your collarbone, sending a shiver straight down your spine, raising the heat between your legs. "I never know if you're a fool or playing a game of chess even I can't make heads or tails of."

His palms find your ass and squeeze, dragging a surprised yelp from you. Silencing your sound with his lips, he uses his grip to situate yourself perfectly as he grinds hard, up and down right against that nerve that makes you see stars.

Your hands slip under his robe, finding skin as you cling to him, already losing control as you meet his thrusts. Your pants are too much and too little, you want them off now but love the teasing, that delicious build in your stomach. Gale has never been so forceful, so demanding, and you tuck an internal sloppy note into your brain to rile him up more often.

His hands finally tug on the rim of your pants and you're quick to help, tossing them to the side as he hefts you onto the table, one hand up your shirt with fingers teasing a nipple as another frees his himself.

No playing this time around as he bites your bottom lip hard, sheathing himself in one quick thrust. Wrapping your legs around him, you urge him in deeper as he starts moving, a punishing pace that sends your heart skyrocketing, your moans loud as he claims you, the frustration from earlier riding his every movement.

You meet his pace just as fiercely, fingers tangling in his hair as he hits that spot again and again, not giving you time to breathe as the pleasure becomes nigh unbearable. You're close, so so close, just as he pauses, all movement coming to a halt.

You whimper, moving your hips for that last bit of friction needed to drive you over the edge, but his fingers dig in hard on your hips, keeping you in place. "Gale." His name is at once foreign and familiar in your lust hazed brain, focus solely on how right he feels even paused within you.

"Promise me," he pants, placing his forehead against yours, shifting ever so slightly to make you gasp. To beg. "You'll stop doing stupid things that scare me."

"I promise, I promise." You'd say anything to get him moving again, and he knows this.

"I have your word?"

"Yes," you plead. "Yes."

"Say it."

"You have my wo--"

He swallows your lies as he buries himself deep, swallows your gasp as he finally allows your release, holds you together as you shatter beneath him.

He rides out your orgasm. Slow, gentle thrusts as you piece yourself back together. As you realize that he hasn't followed you yet into ecstasy.

As you realize it's going to be a long night.

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 gale #gale x reader #gale/reader #bg3 gale/reader #bg3 gale x reader #smut

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animentality · 5 months

Note

seen some posts joking about gortash’s “anti-anxiety coat” due to the immune to frightened enchantment, and its probably not that deep or meta but i actually do find it a compelling look at how he really does walk around almost supernaturally fearless. like even when you threaten him he brushes it off like its funny or just nonsense, if worth reacting to at all! even when you meet him at the morphic pools to face down the netherbrain, his words convey a lack of confidence in winning but his tone and body language do not. and i think part of it is that he is insane (affectionate) but also, possibly, the power of the anti-anxiety coat lol.

he also does things like robbing the crown of karsus from the personal vault of the archdevil mephistopheles, and befriending a bhaalspawn on purpose. things that normal people or even average villains probably wouldnt dream of attempting, and he pulled them off near-flawlessly. but if he’s so effortlessly unflappable, why the coat enchantment right? the game could have made “immune to frightened” an inherent feature, but they made it something he only gains from his equipment. it’s just interesting to think about!

and since i am thinking about it… if we imagine that he is genuinely prone to anxiety or panic attacks, and has difficulty controlling it enough to be worried about appearances in public and have a whole enchanted coat about it, what do you think he’s actually scared of? does he have more of a generalised anxiety thanks to growing up in hell and etc, or do you think there are specific things that really get to him? is it other people? politics, secretly? the idea of powerlessness?

ironically i think the dark urge would probably be the only thing that genuinely does not scare him in the least, and couldnt if they tried.

I think that he was a scared little boy when his parents sold him to pay off their debts.

I don't believe his parents, when they said that he was a spiteful and hateful wretch from birth. Nubaldin says that they sold him to pay off a petty debt.

Now either of them could be lying, but I fail to see why Nubaldin would lie to you. He has no reason to, he just thinks you're one of the spirits of the damned.

Gortash's mom, on the other hand, would lie because she hates Gortash for tadpoling her, and it would be her justification for what she did to him. Plus, she's hoping you can save her, so she has to make herself look sympathetic.

So I think Gortash was hurt and abandoned, and enslaved by an awful devil, who allowed his servants to beat him black and blue. Everyone in the House of Hope is a miserable wretch. The Archivist mentions that his spine was like...I think punctured or broken for making a mistake?

And we know Nubaldin used to "bruise his knuckles" on Enver's "whimpering face."

So he must've been terrified, all of the time he spent imprisoned in the House of Hope. Of being punished, of being trapped there forever...

So when he manages to escape one day, slipping out due to a silly mistake on Nubaldin's part...

What's the first thing he would do?

Try to attain power. But not just because he's scared and wants to feel powerful! I actually have another theory.

See...some people data mined the game and discovered that Gortash might've been intended to be in the House of Hope at some point... because Raphael still has his contract.

So he's still not free of Raphael, even though he escaped him.

He has a note on his body, indicating that he might've been speaking with Helsik about going back, so he could get his contract, presumably.

Now imagine this poor lost young man...whose parents sold him. Who spent his childhood being tortured by souls of the damned and the devil and his servants.

He would never ever want to go back there. Not in life, not in death.

So what does he need to do?

Become powerful.

Strong enough to raid the hells, and either kill Raphael, or at least steal back his contract. so what does he turn to first?

Weapons. The black market. People who know about slipping in and out of the hells, and how to kill monsters, demons, and all other manner of creature.

Then, he needs to curry favor with a powerful god. One who can help him. One who can use him, for his fear and desperation. Who is a good god to turn to for that?

Bane. God of tyranny. Someone who could have use for him, if only he was clever and ruthless enough. And young Enver Gortash has a lot to prove.

And he would be drawn to the power of Bane, the ability to force others to submit to your will.

And the Dead Three?

That's even more power for him to obtain.

Siding with Ketheric, finding the Dark Urge...

I mean.

Listen.

Just on a character level, a powerless abuse victim seeking power does make sense...but I also think.

Wouldn't it be interesting, if he was doing all of this, so that he could both obtain power for himself...and also obtain the power he would need to kill Raphael?

Just food for thought.

Anyway.

Off topic.

Back to the subject of his cloak...well.

He would never want to be afraid again.

Fake it till you make it. Maybe he made or bought the cloak with the no fear enchantment so that he could fake confidence and power, until he actually had it?

Either way, it makes sense with his backstory. It's also so goddamn sad.

Also, he should be afraid of the dark urge, but isn't. Maybe that's why they were drawn to one another.

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #enver gortash #dark urge

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vroomian · 2 months

Note

You know, I just realized that while we know Hells feelings towards the Library Demon, what about Heaven? You said the Stacks were pretty much a shelter?

Why would heaven care about some random demon?

No heaven doesn’t care, but the exorcists and Adam in particular hate his guts. There’s nothing he can really do when no one can find the library demon in the first place. Yrz is careful to never outright kill an angel but he does nearly kill more than a few until the message gets through to Leave The Blue Tagged Buldings Alone. Some things are worse than death.

What Yrz actually does during an extermination is make it so it’s impossible to actually get into the stacks if you don’t already live there. Normally it’s just confusing and tresspassers always end up walking themselves out. Residency is keyed to something like a magic tattoo? Because blood and ink and it’s nearly impossible to steal lol. Yrz is about information. His angelic form can scramble the unwary brain without trying — when he does try…

Have you ever had a migraine? A knock down can’t move without being sick lie-in-the-dark until everything stops hurting, oh-god-kill-me migraine? It’s like that but worse. He scrambles brains like he’s making an omelette. They can’t think, much less fight lol.

Anyone caught in the stacks without a housing deal or work contract from Yrz when he uses his power will kill themselves to be free of the agony. He overloads people with information. Lucifer vox and Alastor are the most able to function while he’s doing this but even then it sucks bad

The reason Yrz doesn’t kill any angels outright is he understands that it’s make the retaliation way worse. Also Lucifer told him not the make trouble and Yrz is technically a guest in his house, so it’s just good manners.

(A fun side affect of this shelter is pretty much all the overlords have temporary contracts for private bunkers in the stacks. They’re expensive but Yrz honors his word and the quality is always assured. No one wants to get on the library demons bad side so pretty much all the overlords are polite.

Other people have tried to find out yrzs secret but considering it’s just yrzs own power it’s impossible to steal lol.

Yrz doesn’t shelter all of hell because he’s not strong enough. Plus the shelters are more of a ‘these are my people’ possessive thing that expanded to a lucrative business. Yrz is always wiped after extermination day.)

#you've got questions we've got answers #Hazbin au #bfiasc

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things-arent-what-they-seem66 · 18 days

Note

46. "That was a bold move." Adamsapple

Hey, I saw that you responded to a ask with an dialogue prompt and you had Lucifer shooting a fireball at Alastor and that wakened something in me, lol. So if it'll be possible to have another with Alastor getting humbled? Please and thank you with a cherry on top

I sure can friendo! Hope you like it :)

Adamsapple with one-sided AngelicRadio

Alastor has never been attracted to many people in his life, hell he can count on one hand how many times it's happened. Three times, this being the third.

Out of all the people in Hell, it was that angel reject he was drawn to. His power alone was worth admiring, Alastor had to have that on his side. If he could get Adam to switch his soul contract over from Lucifer then he'd truly be a force to be reckoned with.

Not to mention the power trip that would come with stealing Lucifer's little bitch away.

Adam and Lucifer sat on the couch, just watching a movie. Everything was calm for once, no drama going on. Adam was slouched down a bit so he could rest his head on Luci's shoulder, their fingers intertwined as they watched a horror movie.

Adam went to take a sip of his drink only for it to be empty. "I'm gonna refill, you want anything?"

"I'm good love."

Adam went to the kitchen to fill his cup. "Hello there."

Adam jumped at Alastors voice. "Uh, hi?" His eyes went wide when the radio demon advanced on him. "What the fuck are you doing?" Adam's lower back hit the counter. Fuck.

"I wanted to make you an offer. It must be so humiliating being the King's little boy toy. Well, if you were under my contract," Al used his shadows to keep Adam in place, a hand swiping hair out of the sinners face. "You'd know where you stand."

Adam scoffed "Yeah, under your fucking boot like Husk." He couldn't stand the way this freak treated Husk. Adam wasn't interested in being another door mat.

"Under me maybe." Adam thought he was going to be sick. "But I would treat you way better."

"Why would he want mediocre when he already gets the royal treatment?" Lucifer's voice came out in a growl. He stomped up to the pair and ripped the radio demon off of his boyfriend. "You keep your filthy fucking hands to yourself you got that? He's MINE." His grip was so tight on Al's neck he nearly snapped it in half.

"Luci?" Adam's voice brought him back and he dropped the other demon and pulled his sinner into a bruising kiss.

Lucifer looked at Al and growled again. "I'll say, that was a bold move. But you'll never fucking have him." He pulled Adam by the hand away from the freak on the floor.

Later that night Lucifer made sure their window was open as he fucked Adam's brains out, the sinner moaning and chanting his name like a prayer. He hoped that asshole heard how much Adam wanted and loved Lucifer instead of him.

And he did.

#adamsapple #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #lucifer x adam #hazbin hotel lucifer #ask

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universitypenguin · 10 months

Text

Reissued Post - Backstory

Author's Note: Because Tumblr was having issues when I posted the original version of this, some of my followers are having trouble accessing it. I'm reissuing a few of my side piece stories so everyone can read them.

Masterlist

Word Count: 3,132

Masterlist

When do you think Lloyd realized he cared and had feelings for princess? I recall in the story that the guys would give Lloyd a hard time when princess finally found a boyfriend that Lloyd would be devastated (poor thing 😭) I also kinda wanna know how he felt while she was dating Aiden. Obviously we know he didn’t like Aiden at ALL lol but did Lloyd ever feel hurt in a way watching princess go on dates with him and when she talked about him?

Learning about Aiden

“Why are you being such a space case?”

You jumped at Lloyd’s question, startled out of your own little world. Scrambling, you shut your screen and re-focused.

“Sorry. I was distracted. What were you saying?”

Lloyd’s sharp blue eyes narrowed.

“Who are you texting?”

“Uh… no one?”

He leaned back in his desk chair and looked at you steadily. You curled tighter into the couch on the other side of his office, looking down at the floor.

“I still have that report to do… maybe I should go work in my office. I don’t want to distract you.”

“I’m already distracted, Princess. What’s the big secret?”

“I met a guy. You know that alumni mixer I went to a few weeks ago?”

Lloyd grunted. “Yeah.”

“His name is Aiden LeDoux. He moved in similar circles to me during college. We kind of hit it off.”

“That’s LeDoux, spelled like the country singer? What state does he live in?” Lloyd asked.

He typed the name into a search engine with the word, ‘Virginia’ to filter the results.

“Twenty-six, graduated three years ago, and works for AVT security?”

“That’s him. What did you find out?”

Lloyd glanced over. “You haven’t run a background check on him?”

“No. That’s for when I’m deciding whether to go on a date with him. But I’m curious.”

“Ah. Let’s do this.”

Lloyd cracked his knuckles and leaned over his computer. Your phone dinged with a message from Aiden, which you responded to as Lloyd typed.

“No speeding tickets, no parking tickets. His academic record was less than stellar. Apparently he subscribes to the philosophy that C’s get degrees.”

“Not everyone is academically inclined,” you said.

“But you are. What will you guys talk about on a date if you have nothing in common?”

“I don’t know. Football?”

Lloyd snorted. “Doesn’t start until September.”

“Oh. That’s why you’re not showering me with long winded descriptions of the athletic accomplishments of people I don’t know.”

“You could always mention how happy you were that the Atlanta Braves won the Superbowl.”

Your eyes narrowed. “I know that’s wrong, but I’m not sure which part.”

Lloyd snickered. “If you have to comment, just say that you’re a fan of anyone who isn’t the New England Patriots.”

“Noted. Anything else on Aiden? Slaps on the wrist from university institutions, or other authorities?”

“Ah-ha. He has three parking tickets at the university. And a complaint for under age drinking. You should reconsider the date. He’s clearly an alcoholic who steals parking spots. One of these tickets was for him parking over the line. Disgusting.”

You laughed. “Terrible. He was probably drunk when he parked. Maybe even high.”

Lloyd toggled over to a different page, one that Jake had set up for him. He typed in Aiden’s information and was surprised to see several security clearances. He checked out the company he worked for and found they had several Department of Defense contracts.

Lloyd memorized the contracts and filed the information away for future use.

Just in case.

Date # 1

You were wearing a short black dress with tights and a blazer. He’d noticed the hemline was shorter than usual, but the jet black tights made it work appropriate. The color only served to highlight the shape of your legs. Lloyd had tried not to be distracted. He failed miserably.

It didn’t help that the cut of the dress perfectly flattered your figure. He caught a glimpse of a spaghetti strap underneath your jacket and the image circulated in the back of his head for the rest of the day.

Fuck. He needed to get laid.

You were his friend and he needed to put aside this nonsense. The chemistry between you would never be realized and that was for the best. He sometimes wondered if the chemistry he felt was all one sided. Maybe you only saw him as a friend and a coworker, not a man.

“Has Y/N mentioned that she has a date tonight?” Jake asked.

Lloyd stiffened. “No. Why?”

“Just wondering.”

He tried to brush off the irritation, but it bubbled up throughout the day.

You had a date. That was fine. It was what single people did, right? They went on dates. He could arrange a date of his own, if he liked. With an age appropriate woman and not someone who was starting on soft foods when he was choosing a college. Lloyd’s eye twitched.

He glanced at the clock. If he wanted an update on the insurance investigation reports he needed to catch you before you head out. Reluctantly, he set off down the hall for your office.

Your door was closed, so he knocked.

“Just a sec!”

Did you sound breathless? When you opened the door, he saw why. The black tights were gone. In their place was a different kind of tights, made of mesh with a floral pattern that wound around your legs making them look long and sexy. The blazer was gone and your dress was held up by the thinnest of straps connected to a tight fitting bodice.

Your height was different, which prompted him to look down.

Fuck me heels. That’s what they’d called shoes like that when he was young. As the saying went, ‘you can’t walk in them, but you can wear them in bed.’

“What do you think?” you asked.

“Is this a first date?”

“Yes.”

“Do you have any concerns about breaking an ankle? Or perhaps an entire leg?”

The shoes bothered him more than the dress.

You laughed and turned to the mirror you’d hung on the far wall of your office. He watched as you applied a fresh coat of red lip lacquer. The shiny finish made him think it wasn't lipstick, but at the same time, it had more color than lipgloss. He wondered if it was one of those fancy products with the no transfer formulas. The kind women usually wore when they planned on kissing a man.

A vibrant image of you on your knees with your lips around his dick came to mind. Lloyd shook his head to dislodge the image.

“Okay, now what do you think?”

“You look beautiful.”

He genuinely meant it.

“Really?” You tilted your head. “What’s missing? Please, just tell me.”

“Well… maybe it’s the context, but you don’t look like you in this outfit. It’s probably just me. I usually l see you in office wear.”

You flashed him a smile. “That’s perfect. I’m going more for attention than authenticity, you know?”

He didn’t, and couldn’t untangle the concept behind your statement. The authentic you was a far better version than this glamorous photo shoot ready version of you. With a quick peck on his cheek, you skirted by him and down the hall to the elevator.

Lloyd stood there, confused, disgruntled, and irritated that he hadn’t even asked about the insurance investigation he’d planned to bring up. He rubbed a hand over his face.

Fucking hell.

When he stepped into your office to lock the door, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. An imprint of red lipstick was on his right cheek. He stared at it for a long moment before he rubbed it away with his thumb.

Lloyd returned to his office in a much better mood than he’d left it.

Date #3

Jake had informed him of your last date, but this time it was Zach who let him know you were going on your third date with Aiden.

Lloyd ground his teeth.

“Careful there. Don’t crack a molar.”

“Shut. Up.”

“Would I do a thing like that?” Zach asked.

He was grinning like a little boy with a sadistic streak and a magnifying glass on a bright summer day.

“You’re enjoying this.”

“Heck yeah, I am. Have you met the dude?”

Lloyd’s head swiveled. “No. Have you?”

“Yep. I waited outside, pretending to be on a call, so I could catch a glimpse.”

“That’s creepy.”

“No, it’s being nosy. I’m a private investigator. Being nosy is literally my job.”

“Well?” Lloyd said.

“He’s six foot three and probably weighs one forty. It’s like looking at a baby colt - all arms and legs, no substance.”

This was great news. If you weren’t attracted to him this would probably be over quickly.

“Did you to talk to him?”

Zach smirked. “I texted her that you needed an update on the insurance case and cornered him in the lobby.”

“She’s going to kill you when she finds out.”

“I bought him a coffee and did a twenty minute interrogation. He didn’t even know what I was doing. He thought I was just being friendly.”

Friendly wasn’t a word often applied to Zach Hightower. Lloyd got along with the Texan because they shared a devious streak and could lose themselves in the hunt; especially when the prey was other human beings.

“Give me your impression.”

“He’s squirrely. I don’t like him one bit.”

Lloyd focused completely on Zach.

“In what way?”

“He used the phrase ‘I was in a mood,’ and not ‘my mood was.’ Stuff like that. Princess got pretty annoyed when she found me getting cozy with her boyfriend.”

“She probably thought I sicced you on him.”

“She asked me what I thought of him this morning and I had to dodge the question,” Zach said. “Landon noticed I didn’t answer and asked what was up. When I told him about interviewing Aiden, he said the mood thing is a sign of a personality problem.”

“What kind?”

Zach shrugged. “The kind that makes you an asshole.”

“She’s going out with him tonight?”

“I guess so.” Zach said.

A long moment passed as Zach stared at Lloyd, expectant.

“Well?”

Lloyd raised an eyebrow. “What?”

“Aren’t you going to say something to her?” Zach asked.

“You’re the one who thinks her boy toy has a personality problem. You say something.”

“Landon said that, not me. I can tell he’s the kind of guy things just ‘happen’ to. The kind that doesn’t realize they’re responsible for how they act.”

“I’m not going to disturb her relationship.”

Zach sighed. “You’re such a bitchy little girl.”

Lloyd sneered. “And you’re a nosy old woman.”

“It’s my job, asshole.”

Date #5

Lloyd should’ve been suspicious when Zach brought him to a bar that didn’t have chandeliers made of antlers.

Obstensivey, this outing was to distract him from your date tonight. When he found himself sitting at a table on the mezzanine of a place called “Club Violet,” questions should have come up.

Jake sat to his left and Zach across from him. When Zach’s eyes began to stray around the room, Lloyd mimicked the behavior, almost out of habit. The lower area held the majority of the crowd. Its large dance floor pulsed with activity and the bar was packed.

Then, he saw what Zach was looking for. You were perched on a barstool, your arms twined around Aiden’s neck. He was standing in front of you, his hands caressing your hips, straying lower than they ought to.

Lloyd’s breath hissed. “Jake, if I throw Zach head first over this railing, do you think he’ll die?”

“Huh?” Jake’s head snapped up from his phone. He stared. “What?”

“I could just snap his neck with my bare hands.” Lloyd’s tone was conversational.

Jake looked between them and then back to his phone. “Landon will be here any minute.”

“Off topic, boy wonder,” Lloyd grumbled.

“It’s relevant. We need two of us to break you up.”

“He’s been waylaid,” Zach said.

Lloyd glanced down and saw that your position had changed. You’d let go of your boyfriend to speak with a newcomer. Even from a distance in dim lighting, he could identify Landon’s fade haircut and the military straight posture.

“Damn it.”

He snarled at Zach, who returned a Cheshire cat grin.

“Well, well, well… look who's coming up the steps.”

Lloyd didn’t need to look. He knew you’d be on your way over. He covered his eyes and groaned.

“I’m blaming you for everything. Everything.”

“Why are you guys playing the role of protective older brothers?” Jake asked.

“Because Aiden’s a squirrely little punk,” Zach said. “See? He isn’t even coming with her.”

Lloyd uncovered his eyes and frowned when he saw Zach was right. Aiden was still at the bar. He’d turned to a girl with raven’s wing hair and was chattering away, looking suspiciously like he was trying to pick her up. His eyes narrowed as something cold moved in his chest.

You arrived on the second level with Landon and were rapidly approaching.

“What’s our cover story?” Jake asked.

“No cover story,” Zach said.

At least Zach was being straightforward, even if he was obnoxious. Lloyd tossed back half of his bourbon and hoped some liquid courage would take the edge off.

Your eyes cut to Zach when you stopped at the head of the table.

“What are you? The Gladys Kravits of Bishop & Howard?”

The big, blond Texan flashed a smile.

“Why thank you, sweetheart. In my profession, that’s the highest compliment one could hope to achieve.”

With an exasperated groan, you dropped into the chair beside Zach, and turned to Lloyd with an expectant expression.

“Can’t you collar him?”

“I’ve tried. Shock collars, choke chains… Nothing has worked.”

Zach slung an arm around the back of Princess’ chair.

“Your boyfriend is an asshole. Landon? You talked to him.”

“Just for ten seconds.”

You shared a look with the dark haired man and slanted Zach a sidelong glance.

“You’re paranoid. I think you should see someone about that.”

He laughed. “I have. They can’t fix me.”

It was annoying that Zach’s arm had moved forward on your chair and was now pressed against your back. Did he think he was your best friend, rather than Lloyd? He had the urge to kick the other man under the table.

You turned to Jake.

“What do you think?”

“I think you’re right. These two,” he gestured to the older men, “are crazy. I think it’s age.”

“Shut up, punk. I can kick your ass any day of the week,” Zach said.

It was pretty much true. Zach only had two inches in height on the young man, but it was the solid 60 pounds of muscle that made him an immovable force. You couldn’t see the weight until he took off his jacket and even then, there was only a hint of the musculature. Zach never wore clothing that drew attention to his physique. He let it come as a nasty surprise to anyone stupid enough to mess with him.

You were bantering with the Texan about him being your nanny. Lloyd watched closely and all he could see in Zach’s behavior was a paternal kind of affection. He knew a thing or two about Zach and because of that, he doubted there were any hidden motivations behind his actions.

What about Aiden had triggered Zach’s instincts? The way he talked. The lack of ownership of behavior. Lloyd tried to evaluate that on its own, treating it as fact. He could see the issue Zach was insisting was such a problem. Sitting there with the others bantering around the table, Lloyd turned his thoughts inward, pretending to present as he ran through the logic in his mind.

He was paying enough attention to the conversation to notice you were gently trying to soothe Zach’s nerves. It seemed to be working, too. Landon was watching you closely and asking questions from interrogation school 101. By the time you left the table, pausing to hug Zach and reassure him that you were totally fine and had listened to all of his red flags, Lloyd had come to a decision.

“What do you think?” Zach asked Landon when you were gone.

“I’m not sure. He seems insecure but hey, some guys of his age just are.”

Zach groaned and shook his head. He picked up his beer and tilted it at Lloyd in a salute.

“Look at the benefits of being nosy. I talked some sense into her.”

Lloyd grunted. He waited for the right moment to corner Landon alone. He caught his shoulder and turned him away from the bar, where he’d been heading.

“Come on. You don’t need another beer.”

“Excuse me?” Landon demanded.

“I want to talk to this Aiden kid. If Zach’s this worried about him, we need to check him out.”

“When did this become ‘we,’ rather than just you,” Landon asked.

“Hurry up, we’re losing him.”

Aiden was heading toward the door and the crowd prevented them from following as closely as they would have preferred. By the time they hit the sidewalk, Aiden was out of sight. Lloyd spun around, scanning the area.

“Shit. We lost him.”

“Is that him?” Landon asked.

Lloyd whirled.

He searched the crowd for a tall, thin man but didn’t find him.

“Where?”

“With the blonde.”

Lloyd’s eyes narrowed on the silhouette of a couple standing in the shadow of a street lamp.

“Are you sure?” he asked.

“No,” Landon said.

Lloyd was almost ready to approach when the couple turned and began walking away.

Landon grabbed his elbow.

“Come on. Let’s not be weird. If you have something to say about Princess’ relationship, say it to her.”

“What, exactly, am I supposed to tell her that Zach hasn’t already?”

Landon snorted.

“You know he’s only saying it because he knows you won’t.”

Lloyd paused. “He is?”

“Yeah. We were expecting you to meet him at least before date number three. But she said you didn’t seem interested, so she wasn’t going to bother.”

“Why didn’t you tell me this?”

“Because we talked about it-”

“We? We, as in who?”

“Everyone. Except for you and Princess.”

Lloyd grunted. “Which is why Zach decided to get nosy.”

Landon shrugged. “He’s your best friend and you’re her best friend. It balances out. We get why you don’t want to step in, and that’s why Zach did.”

They were nearly at the entrance of the club again, when Lloyd stopped short.

“Should I be worried about this guy?”

Landon grunted, rocking back on his heels. The look on his face was all the answer Lloyd needed.

“Right. I’ll look into it.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Masterlist

#series: the princess & the lawyer #the princess & the lawyer #the princess and the lawyer #lloyd hansen fanfic #lloyd hansen fanfiction #lloyd hansen fic #lloyd hansen au #chris evans characters #chris evans characters fanfic #lloyd hansen x reader #lloyd hansen x you #lloyd hansen x y/n #lloyd hansen x female reader #lloyd hansen x fem! reader #the princess and the lawyer: ask #the princess & the lawyer: ask

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merakiui · 11 months

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Floyd's nickname for Vil is Betta-chan-senpai, and so whenever I see your post about betta mer darling I keep thinking about Vil lol. Imagine Azul's reaction if betta mer darling falls hard for Vil (how can slimy tako-chan keep up his suave rizz if his darling prefer a more betta-like mate :<)

(And can I be your 🌟 anon pretty please 🥺 sometimes I sent you chitchats but unfortunately tumblr just ate them up 😔)

I also think of Vil!! Betta mer Vil who happens to charm darling before Azul can is a fun thought. Tako can hardly compete with that level of rizz!!! >_< so naturally he’ll just have to steal you away for himself or find a clever way to trap you in a contract so you’ll be forced to love him instead of Vil. Or maybe he tries to be nicer and sweeter in hopes that you’ll see just how good he is compared to strict, harsh Vil! Or he’s too desperate and finds a way to fill you with eggs before anyone else can so that you’re bound to him by way of biological imperative hehe!!

And you can definitely be my 🌟 anon!!! I hope to receive more of your chitchats! :D and hopefully tumblr won’t eat them!

#twisted chit chat #🌟 anon #when all else fails… eggs - tako thought process <3

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beautifulpersonpeach · 6 months

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namjoon only reworked on face-off and like crazy. the subs for both the commentary and the live show were pretty atrocious and korean is extremely nuanced. plus jimin is probably one of the most humble members who has historically played off his own merit of work before. no one denies that namjoon helped or reworked lyrics, he's there in the credits for a reason. it's just astounding that ppl think he wrote everything when jimin released at least 4 different contents showing his own lyrics.

Ask 2: NAMJOON DID NOT WRITE LIKE CRAZY. What is so hard for you to get??? Fuck you armys acting like he wrote the whole album are you so desperate for clout because your fav is flopping???? Did he even write any lines? Jimin is too humble. He probably just credited Namjoon to be generous. Maybe he wrote one word or two but Jimin showed us his writing process FOUR TIMES you stupid bitch!!! You hagmys keep trying to discredit Jimin. You steal every credit from him and give it to that flopmonster who has to BEG armys to stream his flop music! Jimin did that ogre a favor and instead of you to be grateful you discredit him and give it to RfloppingM like he has any influence on Jimin’s work. You’re worse than shit. With fans like you Jimin doesn’t need enemies. Leave Jimin ALONE.

***

I’ll be getting back to fun asks soon but the volume of asks like this (and worse) that I’ve received since Jimin’s documentary is astounding lmao. It’s as though there’s an epidemic of lack of critical thought that just begs me to clear up. Especially because in this case, the source of confusion: Jimin’s live and the takeaway, is very clear cut and the fact people are struggling with what should be basic, is a damning indication of where too many are headed in this fandom.

Hi Anon in ask 1,

Lol it’s clear you can’t be someone who reads my blog, because if you were you’d know how ironic it is to tell me “Korean is extremely nuanced” given who I am and where I am this very minute lmao. Also, the second posted ask is here for your benefit, given your comment of “no one denies Namjoon helped…”

That said, your ask is a very good mild example of how some people struggle with processing information that contradicts their own views, and care more about signals/actions/words of other akgaes than the reality right in front of them. It’s like that ask I got right after the contract renewals were announced when someone claimed that ‘BTS only renewed group contracts, solo contracts renewals will come later’ despite all of us being privy to the same press release where HYBE announced the renewals… just because that person could not accept that BTS (specifically Jimin) had renewed both group and solo contracts with BigHit.

For some people, unless every single thing is spelled out for them, and even when the piece of referenced media is extremely clear cut, they fill in the gaps with their insecurities to arrive at a conclusion that’s more palatable to their own views. And that’s what you’re showing in this case. I’ll explain what I mean.

The context for your ask is Jimin’s Wlive commentary mentioning how Namjoon stopped by, how Jimin and the pd-nims played the tracklist for him expecting a clap on the back, and instead what they got is Namjoon telling them to go back to the drawing board. Yes the subtitles on Wlive can sometimes be overly simplified, but what both Jimin and Namjoon said, in the Wlive and documentary itself respectively, was itself pretty simple too. Like, what you’ve read is what they actually said. Various ARMYs pointed out Jimin’s reaction to that scene, how he laughed at the shocked and flustered reaction from the production team to Namjoon’s advice to revise it all. That’s the context.

Here’s how akgaes responded:

Pre-emptively claiming it was a mistranslation (it’s not).

Then when faced with the reality that they’d overreacted, claimed ARMYs were saying Namjoon wrote the whole album. Which of course is bonkers and saying this simply because ARMYs mention Jimin and Joon’s words is more an expression of their own insecurity. The only people who could (even in theory) reach that conclusion, are akgaes. Either akgaes for Jimin and Namjoon.

Played up tropes many PJMs are already insecure about which include Jimin being “too humble”, so that Jimin’s comments about Namjoon’s contribution to the album (which we now all know is not a mistranslation), is in part due to Jimin underselling himself.

All three things is what you’ve shown in your ask, despite it being divorced from the reality we all saw.

What Joon actually talked about is how the basis for writing lyrics is the narrative you want to build, which is something that should flow through the whole song and album, and that they’d need to rework it to show this.

Like, again, there is literally no reason this very simple, accessible piece of media should be causing so much grief lmao.

The only reason there’s so much uproar over it is because some very insecure people have hinged their egos on the idea that their chosen idol is infallible and cannot possibly need significant support from members they consider to be below him and his competition. So naturally, they absolutely cannot accept when the members they’ve pitted against Jimin as competition, offer him critical and helpful advise that revamped and improved on the work he did; it pisses them off when ARMYs note it and draw attention to it; and now, given Jimin’s added insight of Namjoon’s critical assessment of the first draft, now they know that when they praise Like Crazy, they are also essentially praising Namjoon’s work, and so they actively look to diminish it.

When the sane response to all this is that it can both be true that Jimin primarily wrote his album, Namjoon contributed not just in writing (based on the credits he has for Like Crazy and Face-off), but also in refining the lyrical message for the project (which he’s not credited for but is now clear after watching the documentary), and that nothing about these facts removed from the quality of work either member put into Jimin’s debut album. FACE is ultimately a culmination of Jimin’s vision, Jimin’s efforts, and Jimin’s talent.

My god, all of this would be obvious if the toxic, mind-rotting disease of intra-fandom competition hadn’t fully infected so many people in Chapter 2. Like, see all I wrote, way too many words, to state yet again something that should be painfully, almost tragically, obvious. All akgae rhetoric has succeeded in doing is dumbing down the quality of conversations we have in fandom spaces, and given how that already was something of a problem within some ARMY pockets, the state of affairs now since the akgae disease caught on presents a pretty grim prognosis.

Anon in ask 1, you might not think you’re an akgae and perhaps you’d struggle to identify yourself with the anon in ask 2, but the underlying assumptions in your ask are identical. And my unsolicited comment is that really should give you pause more than anything else.

Stream Like Crazy for healthy cuticles.

#jimin #park jimin #namjoon #kim namjoon #bts #bts chapter 2 #bts solo stans #jimin face #fandom behaviour #fandom discourse

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sas-afras · 3 months

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okay actually i’m not done yet, one of the things i appreciate about fo3 is the sense of genuine desperation u get throughout the game, especially in terms of how insanely hard it is to get caps? and how it has actual impact on the player & their decisions/morality???

like. a perfect example is when you’re trying to recruit charon, the price to buy his contract is Insanely high and you could get a significant amount of supplies from the amount of money u spend on him. but he’s also a super useful companion, especially for the mutant-heavy quests that happen around the Mall (god knows i never would have been able to finish three dogs first quest without a companion)

but azrukhal also offers u the option of killing greta (a rival bartender) for the contract. and like… theres no real consequences to taking him up on that, mechanic wise. her wife is sad about it, but that’s it. versus the probably Hours of grinding to find enough caps or loot to be able to afford the flat price. the easiest possible option is to do the fucked up evil thing, and you gotta weigh the options on whether or not it’s worth it to you!

like, it feels like there’s real weight to making a selfish/evil decision, versus just doing it to roleplay. its something you have to actually think about!!!!! it’s so sick!!! genuinely it’s one of my favorite quests in fo3, and why charon is my fave companion lol

i wish the rest of the game had similar writing going on, that feeling of actually having to weigh your morals against Survival (or hours of work for the player lol). it truly feels like at this point in fallout games the Quest Decisions™️ you make are just set dressing, and the way you can so easily find any & all resources you could possibly need flattens out a lot of the characters who are supposed to have gray morality. bcos a lot of the villains are villains because they needed to survive!

like, why would anyone bother to steal when it’s so easy to find food just wandering around the commonwealth? why would anyone bother raiding settlements when people just leave valuable loot lying around in open containers everywhere? like, your logic brain can understand that life is hard in this universe and people need to do what they have to to survive, but it’s such a different thing to experience the scarcity for yourself and know you probably would have done the same thing in their shoes. it makes for a much deeper impact.

(and before anyone says it, i know just Having Less Caps floating around is definitely achievable with mods, what i’m saying is that i wish that the game had been built with this concept in mind in the first place lol)

#not art #probably having severe scarcity in fo4 would have fucked with the settlement building mechanics and shit but like #there’s workarounds for that i feel like! especially some that could involve actual like. trade politics and having to Organize shit #with ur settlements instead of being a one man home depot #anyways

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prince-kallisto · 6 months

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Hey ya!

So I was rereading the "Schemer of the Scalding Sands," and I can across this conversation between Azul and Jamil:

I'm not sure if you had discussed this previously or not, but I was curious to know your thoughts on this.

Since Azul uses a person's weakness to form "It's a Deal," is it possible he was able to see something in Crowley's past? Or do you think this is a bluff to persuade Jamil to keep talking (considering we know he used Floyd's SM to prevent himself from getting hypotized.)

NABXHXJSJS you, my friend, have opened up the floodgates BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I LVOE THIS LINE

But…hm??? I could’ve sworn I mentioned this line in one of my theories but I can’t find it lol…I lose track of what I post and what I don’t Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑) Anyway, these lines are very interesting. I don’t think he got any information from Crowley at all, and it was just a bluff! “I know one thing he would never want others to know” is a pretty powerful statement to say about Crowley of all people…and sense we know he had Floyd UM, Azul was just buying time.

If I remember correctly, Crowley managed to free all the students who got their magic stolen by letting Azul continue with his schemes- and gets a percentage of the Lounge’s profits. Jack refers to it as “blackmail,” but I wouldn’t say Azul had specific information over Crowley- it was more of how a large portion of students lost powerful abilities.

His Unique Magic, “It’s a Deal,” can only steal abilities, such as magic, voices, etc., and his contract is just a form of protection against blot. I don’t think even Azul would dare try to steal an ABILITY from the Headmage himself. Azul’s knowledge of “weaknesses and desires” is more like…he knows their weakness because they’re coming to him for help, asking him to grant their desires. But I don’t think he trades in information specifically. Crowley did make a contract though regarding Mostro Lounge, if that makes sense haha. Besides, even if Crowley did give up information to Azul…I have a feeling it would either be false or unimportant. Crowley likes to act like a fool, but I doubt he would give away any information regarding his identity or powers. Plus, I think the “secret” in this arrangement is the fact that Crowley made a ridiculous arrangement with a student in the first place- that wouldn’t sound very favorable to the press, would it? I’d like to add how in the Glorious Masquerade event, even Azul himself is shocked at the amount of personal information Crowley leaked to Rollo- I think Azul underestimates just how much power and control Crowley has over them.

What I really love about these lines is how, if you notice across Book 4 and Book 5, I think Jamil is LEGITIMATELY trying to uncover something about Crowley- likely for revenge. In those lines you sent me, it definitely sounds like Jamil is trying to get his hands on reputation-destroying or even straight up illegal information to use against Crowley. But in Book 5, Jamil mutters about how he doubts the Dark Mirror is actually part of the Student Selection Process, and that Crowley is likely arranging some back door entries, like in the case of Kalim. NRC students don’t care about these kind of details, no one does! But it’s interesting that Jamil of all people, who got a first hand taste of Crowley’s schemes with Kalim getting chosen as housewarden over him, DOES.

I should probably making a post compiling all the times Jamil does this…because even in the Halloween events, he snarks about how it’s “expected” that the Headmage is neglectful or lazy or does shady things. While everyone else just gets disappointed, Jamil sees it as a given fact. It’s…quite sad honestly haha. But those lines from Book 4 really opened my eyes to this! And if Book 8 is about unraveling Crowley and Grim’s past, I hope Jamil is involved, because he certainly seems dedicated to finding out the truth about Crowley.

I’d like to point out a really old (well not really lmao) theory post of mine where Azul has yet another lore drop about Crowley. Well…it’s not really about Crowley but I think it’s important anyway!

Thanks for your ask, I really love these type of lines because I think there’s a lot of subtleties and “reading between the lines” that reveals a lot of these characters, like in Jamil’s case 💞💞💞🐦‍⬛

#kallistopost #twisted wonderland #twst #twst dire Crowley #twst Jamil viper #twst theory #ask kallisto

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camilaxmartin · 2 months

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OKAY SO‼️‼️

i’ve decided to share my art for the first time like publicly😵‍💫😵‍💫 and i’m hella nervous about it but i wanted to share my oc from hazbin with you as i plan on drawing her more and more:)

meet the one and only, caroline - the music demon:)

here’s some facts about her and her backstory if you’re curious: (i’ll probably be updating it when i think of something more)

♪| caroline is alastor’s sister (while on earth as well) (can you tell i love this man???)

♪| (it’s only my own au so don’t come at me please, but i imagine alastor’s dad to be white while his mother had darker skin and as alastor was born darker caroline was originally white, as i am in reality:)

♪| she’s the demon of vinyls and music because of her adoration to it while being alive!

♪| but beside her adoration, it’s also connected with how abusive their father was. (i saw this one day on tiktok and couldn’t let go of it) when she was alive their dad used to always take out his anger on her or their mother, so one day when he got really pissed off and heard caroline’s gramophone playing in her room, he just stormed in, snatched the needle out of the machine and literally cut her body with it (it’s shown in her demon form on which i’m still working)

♪| i also headcanon that their father was the first person alastor ever killed so let’s just say this whole thing messed up caroline’s psyche even more than it was already

♪| her hyena’s features are caused by the way she died which was being fully torn apart by them. (there’s a story about it as well including her ‘friends’ but i’m too tired to write it now😭)

♪| another small story about it - that when she was still alive her ‘friends’ used to bully her for her laugh so because of that, after death, every time she laughs she sounds like a hyena - it’s a sort of punishment while being in hell i think!

♪| anyway! she gained the status of being an overlord when alastor disappeared for seven years and she kind of took his place as his sister and just someone other overlords and sinners knew anyway.

♪| but the story of getting sinners to sell their souls to her is a bit different, she didn’t just steal them from her brother of course. so first when she arrived in hell and reunited with her brother (alastor died a bit before her) and learned about the ability of possessing another’s’ souls she immediately started to wonder what she can do to gain them. at first it was silly games, gambling and stuff like that but the more time passed, she started learning about spells and potions (as she loved them on earth as well) and started to drug the other sinners to sold her their souls (she’s outrageous i know) (i can also add that many sinners sold their souls to her for spending the night with her, but as soon as they signed the contract she’d just leave them hanging and threaten them with second death if they won’t leave her alone)

♪| she’s obviously friends with rosie, the three of them being a literal menace to the hell-society

♪| she got really close with carmilla when alastor disappeared for that seven years and i’m planning on expanding this part a bit more so you can be waiting:)

♪| opposite to alastor she’s very up with trends which also leaded her to being something like friends with velvette.

♪| when they first met, vox told velvette to wrap caroline around her finger so he could get closer to alastor and she did. after many many angst, both of them confessed their feelings in a fight >:] and from then on, began actually dating. (i will expand the angst part but im too tired right now lol)

♪| she lives in the hotel as well, not fully believing she could be redeemed but hoping deep in her heart that it’s possible cause even though she doesn’t think she deserves it and struggles with self-image and self-acceptance, she secretly wants to get better -

♪| - despite being a murder and cannibal even while living. (i may expand this one too but no promises here!)

#my art #my artwork #my art <3 #my artwrok #my art stuff #my ocs #my oc art #my oc stuff #my oc drawing #caroline the vinyl demon #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel art #hazbin hotel oc #hazbin hotel original character #hazbin hotel overlord #camila’s art

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