#it's the main reason why i try not to do discourse anymore & would prefer to stick in my own lane | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

gazrgaley · 1 year

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C.R.O.W (Chapter 2)

On the surface, C.R.O.W.'s. headquarters were unremarkable. A little storefront with no name and nothing on the outside to indicate what they offered or what services they supplied. Devon assumed that was the plan. Make it as vague as possible to avoid piquing the curiosity of the masses.

Inside, it appeared as though the classic cubicle office environment had been compacted into a 20 by 20 foot room. Two rows of computers were located on the left end. Three face the wall, and two line the half-wall that separates that section of the room from the remainder of the space.

Here was where he spent most of his time. Victoria and Ashley B were the muscles so he didn't see them often. Or, when he did, they'd spend most of their time raving over the cute people and the relationship status of the current program they were watching.

Devon would have informed anybody who would listen that he liked it when they were not present. Or that was what he told himself he would say if anyone bothered to ask him. "Yes, I prefer working on my own as debating the love life of fictional characters is stupid and a waste of time." Even though that was the furthest thing from the truth.

However, in reality, he was jealous. Why wouldn't they talk to him about the cute people? And who should and should not be in a relationship. He had views and, at times, strong sentiments concerning these issues.

He would even pay attention to which shows were being critiqued the most. He'd then binge watch them in the hopes of contributing to the discourse. If they had bothered to inquire, which they never did.

As he tried to speak out and share his thoughts on the newest programme, they quickly shut him off. The two Ashleys and Victoria glanced at him as if he were speaking in another language. When Victoria raised her voice. "I believe you stated, and I quote. That devoting so much energy and effort to television was a waste of time?"

He went red and returned to the security of the computer screen. "It just, I was. I was just over at a friend's house and they had it on." He didn't try talking to them again that day. He had no friends, not anymore.

He didn't want to think about it. Thinking about why he had no friends led to thinking about why they all left in the first place, which led to thinking about other things, and he just couldn't do it effectively while trying to be normal in front of everyone he worked with.

This was before Ashley A passed away. They didn't really care for him then, and it has gotten even worse since. Everyone blamed him for this. They accused him for the disappearance of all the intelligence files he obtained on the Kaw-Sekhmu on top of that.

And they no longer tried to disguise their dissatisfaction with him. He considered simply not turning up. Yet he needed the cash. And he wanted to feel like he was a part of something bigger then himself. Even if only through a screen.

A noise from across the room caught everyone's ear. To the left of the office kitchen was Rex's full cubicle. Once again, there came a sound from within the cubical.

Rex cursed himself before rising to face the rest of the room. "They are coming today. I forgot. Damn it, what time is it?Why didn't anyone remind me." He talked as if addressing the entire room, yet his focus was on Devon.

Devon shrunk in his chair. That, he had assumed, was the reason for their presence, and the reason they were in the main lobby rather than the basement. But obviously he was incorrect.

Today, they were hoping to hear from someone who expressed interest in assisting with the zompires. He didn't know much about the person he was speaking with, but he could tell that they were kind, intelligent, and quick on their feet.

He couldn't have forgotten they were on their way. The only topic they discussed was business. But Devon felt that he could connect with someone in those little moments of conversation. They didn't appear to take anything seriously and were constantly cheerful. They were going to infuriate Rex.

Victoria and Ashley B exchanged looks before turning to face Devon. Devon attempted to speak, but at first it only came out as a croak. "I thought you knew." He looked across the room, desperate for someone to support him. "I thought that was why we were all here today. I, I, I thought."

The door suddenly opened. Rex leapt out behind the cubicle, straightening himself as if going to salute the next person to enter the room. Only to be disappointed when Justin stepped in. "Oh, it's just you." Rex stated as he walked over to get himself a cup of coffee. As if he had attended to do this the whole time.

"I thought you wanted me here?" Justin asked, looking around the room confused. "Didn't you say we had someone who who not only knew about what zompires were, but wanted to help us." He looked around the room as if missing something. "Isn't that why everyone is here?"

When he walked towards the center of the room, Rex glanced at the clock. "Well, they're supposed to be here at 0900. You're late by the way; I ordered you to arrive early."

Devon spotted Victoria and Ashley B doing the same thing with their phones beneath the table while he casually peered at the edge of his screen to see what time it was.

Rex has always been a stickler for punctuality. That went beyond the ridiculous notion that 15 minutes is on time and anything after was unacceptable. In fact, not knowing the time from anything other than your internal clock was a character flaw in his view.

Justin, on the other hand, either didn't know or didn't care. He looked at his phone in plain sight before turning to Rex. "It's 8:15," he said, more as a question than a statement.

Everything but Justin and Rex then became the most intriguing item in the room, as if by magic. Victoria couldn't seem to tear her attention away from a simple floral wall hanging. Ashley was fascinated with the shoes she was wearing that day.

Devon had shrunk considerably further in his chair. Looking through the emails of the individual who was supposed to arrive that day. Double checking that he hadn't missed something important.

"That is late." Rex spat, his face turning bright red as if he was going to burst. Then, taking an exaggerated breath, he gradually began to revert to a human shade. Before returning to his desk, he waved Justin off. "For the next half hour, do something significant." Before vanishing behind the cubicle walls.

As if a deer in headlights, Justin looked from Rex, then to the girls, both of them wide eyed, slowly shaking their heads. "Don't say anything." Ashley wordlessly mouthed as she patted the seat between her and Victoria.

"What exactly does he want me to do?" As he sat down, Justin whispered to both of the girls.

"Just tap at the keyboard," Victoria said quietly as she leaned forward. "He'll leave you alone if you sound like you're doing anything."

I play Candy Crush," Ashley said, a little grin on her face.

The longer time passed, the more tense the room became. No one dared to talk, but Justin, Victoria, or Ashley would gaze at each other and laugh. Then they return to their phones, furiously composing a text. Devon's first thought was that they were all messaging each other. Devon lowered his gaze to his phone,no new messages.

Unlike them, he needed to be doing something, not simply pretending. But he couldn't bring himself to do any of it. He couldn't stop thinking about this unknown ally getting screamed at for being five minutes early. He should have told them to arrive sooner. They'd despise him for not informing them. So long, potential friend, It was fun while it lasted.

The longer time elapsed before the appointment, the more tense the atmosphere became. They were still not there after fifteen, ten, and five minutes before nine o'clock. It wasn't until 9 a.m. when the door slid open. "I've arrived!" I know you've all been looking forward to my presence. But I'm finally here."

Devon's stomach sank to the floor as he gazed at the blond man with round cheeks and a button nose. It was him, Devon knew it. That was the man he was sharing emails with for the last few weeks.

It was true there were two of them, but the man with the cherry red hair didn't fit the person he had in mind. It was at that moment he knew this couldn't end well. He knew what the blond was and he had a strong feeling the other was the same.

Rex was in front of the two within seconds. "You're late." He barked at them, trying to assert dominance as he eyed the two up and down.

"Na au." The blond said, pushing his phone into Rex's face. "One minute, see? You said 9am. Today. In your email. If you wanted me before that you should have said."

Rex took a step back. "It's polite to arrive early," he said through gritted teeth.

"Well that's just stupid, you should just say what you mean." His face scrunched up as he turned to the other. "He should have said."

The other man's focus had not been on him but the girls. "Can we just get this over with. This was your idea and I don't fancy being here all day."

The blond then took another step forward so he was face to face with Rex. "Are you feeling alright? Or does your face always look like that? If I'm being honest. You look nothing like how I pictured you."

"I wasn't the one emailing you." Rex managed to get out through a clenched jaw.

The guy gazed around the room, briefly considering Justin and the girls before settling on Devon. The man then hopped up on the barrier and knelt in front of Devon. Devon swiftly averted his head away from the man, who's crotch was uncomfortably close to him.

"It was you? Wasn't it." He peered down at Devon with a toothy grin.

Devon swallowed and nodded, feeling trapped and unable to say anything else.

"Knew it. Now this is more what I had in mind." He slid his hand between his thighs and extended his hand to Devon. "My name is Grendel," he said, glancing up at the other Man, who gazed around the room as if he were some kind of high-ranking aristocrat. "And my friend over there is Milo. Don't worry, he's nicer than he looks."

Grendel then leaned down, almost brushing Devon's nose with his own, before drawing back and turning to face his companion. "He's a cutie, can I have him?"

Milo ruled his eyes "No, you may not. And can we please get on with this?"

"Absolutely, I concur with, what was it, Milo?" Rex said. Trying to avoid looking at Grendel but his gaze kept wandering over to him. "Before we can work together, I need assurance that you mean business and that we can rely on you."

Justin hung back as Rex explained all that happened. Vampire slaying, and the mysterious benefactor who previously funded their efforts. He dropped hints that the donors might not be reliable in the near future, but not saying why he thought this.

Explaining C.R.O.W. in great detail. He wanted to pull in more help from other places in case disaster struck. Of course, Milo was well aware who the mysterious benefactors were. He was present during Amy's death and was more informed about the church's activities than anybody else there, aside from maybe Justin.

Justin was mostly concerned with Milo, but he did occasionally take note of Grendel. He took Justin's place between Victoria and Ashley, where he engaged in idle chatter with them. Not that he was capable of more than small talk. Not only did he appear to be too inebriated to know where he was, but he also gave no indication of having more than two working brain cells on a good day.

"Can you tell us about your qualifications to help us?" Rex questioned with a poker face. "I intend no disrespect," Rex went on, surveying Milo's attire and demeanor. He was dressed in a custom-made brown suit with an ornate pattern and carried a cane for reasons unknown to Justin. "You don't strike me as the kind to get engaged in combat."

Milo didn't immediately respond. He cast an ashamed glance at the cane. "Maybe at first glance that's how it seems. But trust me, I'm stronger than you give me credit for." Then he cast a short glance at Grendel and said, "And despite his faults, I have faith in his ability to be an effective fighting partner for you. At the end of the day, that's all that really matters. For the zompires to be eliminated?"

Rex studied him for a moment before nodding in agreement. "I suppose you're right. We'll move on. I want to show you what we are up against. Vampires are one thing, but the zompires are something completely different. They are stronger, and. Well it will be easier if I just show you what we know."

It should have come as no surprise to Justin when Rex began leading them to the basement. But he wasn't expecting things to move so fast. It took weeks of talking to C.R.O.W. before he was authorized or even realized it existed.

But this was different. Devon had been in contact with them for much longer than that. And as Justin was the only one who knew they were vampires. The others had no reason to be suspicious of them.

By going past Rex's desk and through the unisex lavatory in the back of the building, one might get access to the basement. There were three stalls, the middle one had a handwritten note, saying it was out of order. Once inside that stall, a number pad lay concealed in the sanitary napkin disposal bin. And with the right code, the toilet was lowered and a door opened behind it. The exposed ladder would provide access to the building's lowest levels.

It dropped you to what appeared to be a storage area. Boxes and cobwebs clogged the space. But, knowing where to look revealed a number pad capable of moving a wall.

A sizable area lay beyond this. Computers lined the two walls leading to the fitness center. One any local fitness center would be envious of.

Although other fitness facilities featured practical apparatus, this one had equipment designed to prepare them for real-life difficulties. There was a rock wall and what appeared to be a little structure alongside an extreme jungle gym workout center.

And, on the other side, the thing that disturbed Justin the most. Mannequins with a large portion of their chest removed and replaced with a gelatinous form. The goal was to replicate the sensation of staking a vampire, with the skin and bones having the same solidity.

Justin understood the practicality of this. But he had never encountered a cold-blooded vampire. So all he could think of when using this was that he was plunging a piece of wood and threw a person.

Fortunately for him, they were more interested in zompires, an off set of what Milo was. And they had no reason to assume wood might stop them. So he'd only had to go through this once before.

Milo's focus shifted to that corner. "Have wooden stakes been effective in killing them?" Disapproval of the concept itself radiated from him.

While peering across the room, Rex drew nearer to Milo. "The vampires we usually battle? Yes, they did what they were supposed to. The new ones though." The man shook his head sadly. "This does nothing to them."

Like a young child eager to tell the new kid at school about his bug collection, a grin formed on his face as he glanced over to Milo. "The stakes, however, were never intended to be anything but a final measure. If one of those fucks went too close, for example. Do you want to have a look at some of the real toys?"

"Oh, I've got some fantastic toys, too, and I'm not afraid to share," Grendel said as Rex left the room. Twirling about on one of the desk seats. He sat on it, his head and legs protruding past the arm rest.

"Do you have to hit on anything with a pulse?" After holding back so many other things he wanted to say to him that morning, Justin finally snapped.

Grendel shook his head. "Someone's lack of a heartbeat has never scared me off before." He said as the chair swiveled passed Justin once more.

"You're disgusting," Justin said. "Do you think that's a good pick-up line?"

As the chair turned again, Grendel spoke out. "Yes, More than you would think anyhow."

He would have assumed it was a joke if it had been anyone else. Yet the little he knew about Grendel informed him that it wasn't. A loud thump interrupted Justin's thoughts as Rex returned to the room. At his feet lay a huge trunk.

As he opened the trunk to an array of weapons. Every type of weapon imaginable, from a bowie knife to a whole arsenal of guns. From little, one-handed guns that you could hardly see, to a massive one that filled the entirety of the six-foot box. Rex looked over everything proudly, curious to see what Milo thought of the loot. "We call this box a tool kit. Each of us has one."

Rex knelt down when Milo didn't show as much interest as he'd hoped. A container of what seemed to be tar was hidden behind a layer of foam in the trunk. Milo backed up a little as Rex got to his feet and flipped the lid open.

Justin was certain that no one else had spotted it. Milo's motions, however, always seemed premeditated, even when they were reactionary. Only now did he understand that was the same reaction he had to automobiles when they first met. This told him that this chemical worried Milo in some way.

"Can you tell me what this is?" Rex inquired, putting his finger into it and extending it to Milo.

"I have no idea." Milo stated, raising his nose to it, a look of disgust on his face. "Is it fatal to them?"

"If only," Rex said, as Milo seemed to ease up. Again, no one else would have seen the difference, but Justin did. "It inhibits their ability to recover. We spread it on whatever weapon we're using, such as a knife, or load bullets with it so it explodes within the body.

However it appears to be excruciatingly painful. Unfortunately, it does not kill them. We even conducted an experiment. I tethered one to a tree and sliced it up with this stuff. Nothing occurred; they simply howled in agony for hours.

The fact that Milo didn't think their weapons were impressive upset Rex. Yet he persuaded himself that wasn't necessarily a negative thing. Milo must have access to something far more potent if he found what they had to be dual.

There were more remarkable things Rex had, but he wouldn't show them off to a complete stranger so soon after meeting. But he had a good feeling about working with Milo.

"We don't know much about these new vampires, but we've started to fill in the gaps. About the zompires in particular, "Rex stated as he proceeded to hand over the zompire documents to Milo. They had relocated to a separate office and were now sitting around a circular table.

"They seem to be at different levels of decay. But they all seem to have the same speed and strength." Rex continued.

Milo browsed the papers, showing only lukewarm interest in what he was reading. "I see. I take it you also have files on the Netopuri like this?"

Rex paused before responding. He'd only heard the phrase Netopuri a few times. The first was from Malachi, the priest who had sponsored the C.R.O.W. project, and the second was from the beast itself.

Yet this wasn't the first time Milo had said something that made Rex wonder how much he knew. He'd used the phrase zompire, which he knew was just a term used among their group. Then even knowing the correct phrase for the simpler vampires intrigued him.

"Yes, but that's hardly relevant. I would like to focus on the zompires today. We have evidence suggesting they are a variant of another kind of vampire. Yet we've only ever faced up against a single one of them." Thinking about how rapidly things escalated, he stopped talking. Everything Milo needed to know was recorded on official documents. Rex would do well to act as though it wasn't as traumatic as it was.

Rex took another file out and handed it to Milo. "The thing is this one seemed to be able to think on its own."

"So what makes you think she's the same as the zompires?" Milo asked as he read through the pages.

"It died the same way as the zompires." Rex said with a shrug. "The way I see it is they start out that way and their mind slowly routes until it is just a mindless monster."

"What evidence do you have of this?" Milo asked, his eyes on the paper the whole time.

"We have very little to go by. I'm still up for any new information we can get." Rex watched Milo more carefully. He wasn't telling them everything. He had to have known more than he was letting on. But Rex was quickly starting to like him.

He was quiet and despite not sharing much now. Witch in Rex reasoned, was a good thing. He was also trying to figure out if he could trust C.R.O.W. He knew Milo could be a great asset to the team.

Grendel, on the other hand, appeared to be little more than a nuisance. He looked to be high even now. He could hardly sit up straight. His head rested against Milo's arm, one leg hanging on the side of the opposite arm rest. He wondered if they were gay and shuddered at the thought.

"Have you met any of the smarter zompires yet?" Rex asked, hoping to extract more from Milo before they left that day.

"I'm afraid the knowledge I can give you is very limited." Milo's hands slipped and a photo from the file he was looking at landed on the table.

Grendel watched the photograph as it toppled onto the table. He was probably too high to even comprehend what he was looking at, Rex thought to himself.

Then Grendel shouted just as Rex was about to speak. "I'm bored," as he swung away from Milo and over to the side where Victoria was sitting. He slouched forward in the chair, almost touching her shoulder. "How did you do it? How did you kill one of the smart zompires without anyone being hurt if they're so tough to kill?"

"All the information you need may be found in the file." Rex growled in the hopes of scaring him away from Victoria.

"It doesn't look like they did," Milo said, addressing Grendel. "It looks as if one person died and two others were injured.

"Oh no, that's so sad." Grendel's voice was monotone, and his stair was empty as he looked around the room.

Milo gave him a sidelong glance. "I wasn't talking about the Kaw-Sekhmu. The humans were harmed and one died. "

This time, Grendel's setup, wide eyed. "No, I'm sorry, I misunderstood you. That's terrible." He cast a tense glance around the room, as if only now realizing where he was. He turned to Milo with his mouth agape.

Rex could have punched Grendel in the face at that moment, but there were more important things to do and he was going to be the bigger person.

"I'm sorry for your loss," Grendel said to Victoria. "Losing a loved one is never easy. Were you two close?" He grasped for her hand, a convincing look of concern that filled Rex with rage. But it was ok, it would never work on Victoria.

Rex shot Grendel a dark look. Letting go of Victoria's hand, Grendel melted back into his chair so only the top of his head was visible to Rex.

When Rex raised the point that "there are more important things that they needed to be talking about right now," everyone listened. He could no longer see Grendel but his stupid face was burnt into his mind. Yet another worthless slob. He pondered what, exactly, Milo saw in him that made him think he could be an asset to him.

"Not important?" Grendel straightened up. "They served as a member of your squad. How could you possibly dismiss their significance?"

This was not going to end well, Rex reasoned. Victoria, Ashley, and even Justin had there heads down as in a moment of silence. Indeed, Ashley A's death was tragic. But she wasn't going to remain there indefinitely. The only reason she was there was because she was dating his sister.

She would have been a distant memory as soon as they recognized it was meaningless and moved on with their lives.

But it would never happen now. She'd be burned into everyone's mind, and his sister left with this ridiculous notion that she may have been the one.

That was the end of it. Rex smacked his hands on the table. He considered forcing them to go, but just as he was ready to say anything, he remembered what Milo said. He called the not-zompire something else. But he couldn't recall what it was. He made an effort to relax. What did Milo know?

"We can all talk about our feelings and how sad we are after the horde of evil monsters are dead. But right now we have to talk about how we are going to stop them." Why was Rex the only one who understood this?

Grendel leaned in close to Victoria, speaking in her ear loud enough for everyone to hear. "Do you have good health insurance?"

Victoria gave him a perplexed glance.

"I mean, I've seen worse situations before, and it's never cheap." Grendel spoke so solemnly that it forced her to engage with the nonsense he was trying to get at.

"What are you on about?" Victoria inquired, a fleeting glance at him followed by a return to the rest of the room. She attempted not to interact but yet not wanting to appear rude.

"That rod in his ass is going to have to come out at some point," Grendel lingered, now with a cheeky grin on his face. He must have thought he was so funny.

Then Victoria did something Rex couldn't forgive. She laughed, a real chuckle. She soon realized her error and covered her mouth. Trying to appear to be professional. Grendel sat there, a pleased expression on his face.

He was either the dumbest person on the planet or he was attempting to crawl beneath Rex's skin on purpose.

"Out!" Rex yelled.

"You want us to go." Milo asked, maintaining his cool manner throughout.

"I mean, no, yes." Rex could feel himself growing agitated. Typically, he could compose himself better. But the way Grendel was acting, he couldn't help himself. You don't say things like that, it was unprofessional. And the way he hit on Victoria all day. She wouldn't fall for some, no bone, jelly loser like him.

"Just him," Rex said, pointing to Grendel. "He can't possibly be here. We're going to be discussing top-secret matters, and he's simply. Just leave." Grendel's expression widened as Rex pointed at Grendel and then the door.

"All right," he said as he sprang off the table. "I'll just go play with some of your toys. Honestly, that seems like a lot more fun than this."

"No," Rex mumbled. "Do not touch anything."

"How, then, are you going to stop me?" Grendel's eyes broadened, mirroring his smile.

"Devon, follow him." Rex exploded. "Be certain that he does not touch anything."

Grendel walked out of the side room with a bounce in his step following Devon out. Once they were a few feet into the room Grendel sprung toward Devon, Catching him from behind and clinging to him as they went. "You've been unusually silent tonight. Is there a problem?"

Devon pulled away from him, as he made it to his desk and sat down in his chair. "This is simply who I am. You just don't know me."

Grendel watched with interest, maintaining his bright grin. He was great at reading people. And this wasn't the person he was talking to through emails. Or had he just read him wrong. He pushed that thought aside. That couldn't be the answer.

He grabbed the seat next to Devon, pulling himself over. "Oh come on, don't be that way. I thought we were friends?"

"We are not friends." Devon snapped. There was a sharpness to his voice that made Grendel flinch.

"since when?" He asked, trying to appear he was hurt by this statement. But mostly, he was confused. He thought he did a good job at worming his way into Devon's trust. None of this made any sense.

He had to maintain a specific appearance. He needed to project an image of kind, friendliness, and, most crucially, incompetence. He had to seem clueless to pull this off. No one trusted the smartest person in the room.

"Aww, are you jelly that I was chatting up the ladies instead of you?" He leaned forward, toeing the line between playful and seductive, strategically placing his hand on Devon's upper thigh. "How can I make it up to you?" Grendel saw the reddening of Devon's face and assumed victory.

"We are not friends," Devon said with an icy tone, facing Grendel. "I know who and what you are and why you're here."

"I know who I am too." Grendel answered, with a wink and a grin. "I can't help it. I'm just the most charming person in the room. People love me."

"You're a Kaw-Sekhm, and I'm not interested in being your next meal." After saying this, he swung around, and looked at the monitor in front of him.

Grendel reclined on his chair. That would have been different if he had used the term "vampire" or some such phrase. Devon, on the other hand, recognized the name. He attempted to maintain his artificial grin, but it began to fade as he watched Devon with one hand covering part of his face.

Why didn't he just tell the others as they walked in? That was the notion that kept going through Grendel's head. Yet he couldn't ask that question. Devon might not have said anything for the simple reason he hadn't thought to do so. It may have been the impetus he needed to say something. Yet it was all Grendel could think of.

Grendel took up his surroundings quickly. He was certain that he and Milo could simply flee. Yet if something bad happened to Milo, even if it was minor. He would be unable to forgive himself for a long time. After all, this was his idea.

Grendel leaned forward, gathering himself. "How? How do you know that?" There was no use in denying it now.

Devon regarded Grendel coolly, his eyes hard. "I've been tracking you and your kind for a long time. We know who you are and what you're capable of. Unlike the normal vampires you guys could walk in daylight and eat food if you want."

Grendel leaned back in his chair, his mind racing. He had underestimated C.R.O.W. He had thought they were just a bunch of amateurs, but clearly they were much more organized than he had anticipated. He wondered how much they knew. quickly worrying about his family, like Richard, Molly and there small child Olive.

"How much do you know?" he asked, his voice low.

Devon shrugged. "Enough."

Grendel became so engrossed that he forgot about his mask. He glanced over at the conference room before returning his attention to Devon. "How come they didn't recognize me?" Whispering as he leaned in.

Devon hesitated for a moment, eyeing Grendel warily. "I don't know. Maybe they just didn't see your face clearly. Or maybe they weren't paying attention."

Grendel leaned in closer, his eyes fixed on Devon's face. "You're not telling me everything," he said, his voice low and dangerous.

Devon's jaw tightened. He knew he was playing a dangerous game, but he couldn't bring himself to reveal everything he knew about Grendel and his kind. He had his reasons for keeping some things to himself. Grendel was going to find out what that was.

He kept his sights on Devon as a small bead of sweat began to pull and drip down his face.

"Because all my research was destroyed. And if I let them know I remembered too much. Say your face. Then they would find out I know more and I don't want to see them killing children."

"So how did they get destroyed?" Grendel, still watching him intently.

"I didn't burn them."

"I didn't say you," Grendel started to say as a smile crept on his face. "Oh, but you did." He moved in closer. "Is that why everyone is giving you the stink eye? Why did you do it?"

Devon didn't answer, every muscle in his body seemed to tighten up. He no longer was locked onto the computer, but he still didn't dare look at Grendel.

This wasn't good. Grendel sat back in his chair, considering Devon's words. He knew that he couldn't stay with the group forever, but he also knew that leaving would come with its own risks. For now, he needed to figure out a way to protect himself and Milo, and he couldn't do that without more information.

"Listen, Devon," Grendel said, leaning forward once again. "I don't want to fight with you or the rest of the group. But I need to know what they know about me and my kind. Can you help me out with that? They don't understand what we are. And like you said, there are children we need to protect."

He needed Devon on his side more than ever. The others know very little. But if he started killing people now. He was sure Devon would say something.

Devon hesitated for a moment before nodding. "I'll see what I can do. But you need to be careful, Grendel. They're not going to go easy on you if they find out you're a vampire."

If he left things like this it could be bad. He would have to lighten the mood. "Don't worry, I got the perfect alibi for you."

Grendel then moved in even closer, his speech barely audible, as though they were at a sleepover discussing boys. "I can see it now." Grendel said this as he placed his hand on Devon's shoulder and drew his hand in front of them, as if sketching an invisible rainbow.

"It was going to be a beautiful day. So you went on an exciting wilderness walk. The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and so on." Grendel made a motion with his hands, continuing the narrative.

"When you found yourself in the middle of a snowstorm." Grendel grabbed Devon for emphasis. "You had no option but to seek sanctuary in the cave with your one and only comrade, the yeti."

"What?" Devon drew back. "How did the yeti get here?"

"Shush, I'm narrating the story," Grendel protested. "He was there the entire time, but he was too busy doing other things to be essential to the plot until now."

"What is his significance to the plot?"

"Shush. Let me tell the story. So you and the yeti are trapped in the freezing cave. And all you have with you is a backpack with all the information you have about the Kaw-Sekhmu. The yeti instructs you to burn it, but you know you can't. This information is much too valuable. But, no." Grendel snatched Devon again, squeezing his face this time.

"The pregnant mother is going to give birth." Grendel's voice softened as Devon drew away.

"There is now a pregnant woman? Where did she come from?" He backed away, more irritated by the conflicting tale than anything else. "And don't claim she was present the entire time."

"Maybe she was trying to find a place to hide from the storm too?" Grendel shrugged, having no conviction in his answer.

"A pregnant woman at nine months? Why was she out in the storm in the first place? That's simply stupid. You're terrible at telling stories."

"You're the one who destroyed the files, I'm just trying to give you an out." Grendel inquired, noting Devon seemed more at ease.

"No, I didn't." He spoke with less conviction this time, and his gaze flickered from Grendel to the conference room.

"Blink five times if you don't feel safe." Grendel questioned, and Devon moved in closer before blinking, much to his surprise. Their noses would have touched if one of them moved.

"You're correct, I don't feel comfortable. Do you want to know why?" Devon inquired gently, while Grendel nodded. "Because I'm hearing the most horrible goddamn story I've ever heard in my whole life." He then reclined in his chair. "And the narrator is a vampire who is probably coming to kill everyone, including myself."

"So why don't you simply tell them?" grumbled Grendel. He had to be cautious. Devon would ponder about it or, worse, convince himself into informing the others if he posed that question too many times. He needed to convince him that they were friends, or at the very least on the same side.

"The truth is." Grendel's grin had vanished. Now for the lovely Grendel, who only smiles to disguise his profound dark agony because no one knows who he truly is. He hung his head low, as if he was about to reveal a terrible secret.

"The truth is that I want the zompires dead. And I'm worried that if it's just the two of us, Milo will get injured. I wanted to find somebody who could assist me." He raised his head to check whether he was getting through to Devon. "You know, it's only been the two of us for so long; I don't believe I'd be able to face it if something happened to him."

"You're using us as cannon fodder?" Devon responded without passion in his voice. As he spoke,Grendel removed the mask of sadness off his face. Knowing the sob story wasn't going to plan.

"Fine, yeah." Grendel confessed, throwing his hands up. "But don't look at it like that. It's more like a mutual, fondling. Fodder?" He quickly corrected himself with a cheeky grin. "Like You guys are only humans, If you have us help we can get more done. And if you get lucky we will become over-confident and get ourselves killed?"

The mussels in Devon's body finally seemed to relax as he contemplated this. Grendel grabbed his hand. Pulling it close to his face. "Please don't tell the big, bad, scary vampire killers who we really are." placing a gentle peck on his hand as he pouted, giving the most desperate face he could muster. "Please?"

Reluctantly, Devon nodded as Grendel pulled away. "And for the record, I'm a fantastic story teller."

#warm blooded vampires series #writing #vampires #gaz042 #crow #chapter 2 #C.R.O.W #vampire story #gothic novel #urban fantasy #wattpad #my writting

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alteredphoenix · 2 years

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I don’t know if this says something about me as a writer or the way Zereth Mortis’s storyline feels so patchworked and condensed, but every time I work on the ZM Fic and its side story I’m always forgetting about Thrall and Baine - and when I do remember I have to tell myself not to forget about them. That’s where I start to think if - and by how much - the expansion got truncated to such a degree that 9.2 had to trim the fat just to go from ZM to the Sepulcher just like that (and I always thought while it was unique that the campaign questline had you go in there, grab Anduin, go back out to make the Crown of Wills, and go back into the rest of the Sepulcher, I also think it’s such a haphazard way of doing so instead of approaching it a different way a’la without Anduin physically being there because Zovaal’s not going to stop dicking around with the Machine of Origination while you’re putzing around in Bastion on a quest to make a new Arbiter).

At least Thrall has some sort of reason to stay in the Shadowlands i.e. Draka, but also because his actions indirectly led to Sylvanas becoming Warchief who therefore kicks off everything between Legion and SL. Baine, on the other hand, doesn’t get that, or at least chooses not to seek out his father and talk to him despite there being indications that something was going to/supposed to happen between them after the Tauren Heritage Armor questline. OTOH you can argue that Baine being in Torghast mentally fucked him up so bad that him sitting in Oribos can be considered a realistic reaction to being tortured...but you don’t get to see that because that never left SL alpha, so that just tells me that despite it not being present for the player to see it at least happens off-screen. So while Baine’s reaction and lack of involvement can be forgiven this also made him into a meme the community latched onto and hyped up once he actually got up...but since he doesn’t go out of his way to find and talk to Cairne, that significantly reduces the meaning of his presence in the Shadowlands. Then again, he’s also Anduin’s friend and tries to beseech him to look to the Light while in Bastion, so even if he’s not being proactive he at least has a minor role in being The Heart.

Since the ZM Fic takes a different approach toward the Broken Crown quest by removing Anduin from the equation altogether and not being retrieved until the endgame a’la the Sepulcher raid itself, that means I would have to give Baine a very good reason to go to Bastion and help make the Crown of Wills. Hence since he’s The Heart of the party, he would have to maintain a passive role but doing it this way means he’s not exactly languishing in Haven and makes him somewhat more proactive to the plot despite being a relatively minor character. Although it’s the same with Thrall, but he has more at stake going on because (a) Sylvanas dragged him to the Maw in the first place to humiliate him and Baine, and (b) that’s two Warchiefs in a row that have sent the Horde on a death spiral that he’s had to witness once personally and the other being told to his face (by Saurfang) and having Loyalist assassins get the jump on them. That’s not to say Baine doesn’t deserve his own part to play in SL; after all, he was imprisoned by Sylvanas in the Underhold and almost got to watch Thunder Bluff burn, so by technicality he should have done more to earn the spot of being in the Shadowlands...but while you can argue from an out-of-universe perspective as to why he didn’t (and I’m not going to say ‘he wasn’t allowed to’ because that’s being accusatory to the devs and I don’t have information nor evidence to prove that ‘he wasn’t allowed to’ is true), from an in-game POV Torghast screw with him so badly he couldn’t do more than beyond the bare minimum.

Looking at this post, I do see how SL is so cut and strung together, and I do see good parts in it despite it being so flawed (and, IMO, one of the weaker expacs, next to TBC and WoD). I don’t know if it’s because of the ongoing lawsuits that jettisoned whatever plans the devs might’ve had for SL (e.g. the possibility of a Drust raid and a 9.3 patch) or the result of the community reaction online (which I noticed that whenever reactions do happen, they’re loud, loud enough to the point of inducing several Author’s Saving Throws to curb the heat, which...I’m learning I am not very fond of, at all, having to tailor a story based off backlash and outrage, which also explains why I don’t stick with popular fanon). As I’ve said, I don’t like making conspiracy theories around things that might have/could have happened but never made it live because it didn’t fit the game’s narrative tone or direction. I would prefer to criticize rather than commit to shit-slinging.

But despite the flaws I do see an upside to writing a fic set in an expac that’s heavily maligned, and while it doesn’t retcon from Legion onwards like most Fix-It Fics prefer the ZM Fic still plays somewhat loosely with 9.2′s approach while still maintaining most of its canonicity. So even if Thrall and Baine (and hell, much less Anduin, he’s barely in this fic to begin with) aren’t at Main Character/Important Supporting Character status that Sylvanas and Jaina do in this fic, I can give them small roles that will at least carry them long enough to make it to the end (and into Dragonflight, although I’m not expecting Thrall to do anything of the sort afterwards, and I wouldn’t be too surprised if Baine isn’t involved with the Wrathion and the black dragons the same way Jaina will be for Kalecgos and the blues and Tyrande with the greens; DF is the story for the dragons, after all).

#warcraft #like at least with WoD we know a lot about the cut content that should've been in the main campaign #plus the scenarios that were supposed to have been there #it's hard to say what SL was supposed to have besides the maw prologue having a little more story to it #and everything else i mentioned above #because things like that AFAIK aren't or haven't been documented.#then again denathrius was supposed to die & unfortunately fandom thirst saved him from an early grave #which means community reaction DOES play a role as to which direction the story is going to go #also then again there's everything w/ sylvanas despite the massive outcry following sanctum's ending #and everything w/ calia #so that also means community reaction doesn't ALWAYS dictate the story's direction #it almost feels like a nasty game of tug of war between the players and the devs #it's the main reason why i try not to do discourse anymore & would prefer to stick in my own lane #case in point i've been thinking about this lately as i've been plunking at the ZM fic #it's kind of funny but also frustrating b/c i'm so damn forgetful - and a writer must never forget #but at least i'm catching this early before i start writing the main ZM Fic so i can adjust my table of contents accordingly #this post isn't meant to start shit btw - these are just my observations from playing the ZM campaign questline #baine isn't my favorite character by a longshot - i'm rather ambivalent to him #like i am to most wow characters #but i hope he gets a small role in DF w/ the black dragons so i can tinker around with him #idk about all this talk of 'lore butchering' or 'character assassination' or 'disrespecting the IP' ppl go on about #or even the whole 'blizzard forgets their own lore' thing - all of that means little to nothing to me #but i do think wow needs more polishing - retcons are one thing but plot holes are another beast #also more communication between teams otherwise you're going to get stuff you play that ends up being non-canon e.g. stonetalon mountain #fanfiction #mywriting

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gimme-mor · 3 years

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ACOTAR THINK PIECE: ELAIN ARCHERON, UNTOUCHABLE

*DISCLAIMER*

This will be a long post.

Please take the time to read this post in its entirety and truly reflect on the message I am trying to send before commenting. My goal is to use my background in Gender and Women’s Studies to deconstruct the comments I have seen on Tumblr and Twitter and bring awareness to the ACOTAR fandom.

The reason I am tagging “Elriel” in this post is to call attention to the arguments in the Elriel fandom that: weaponize Elain’s femalehood to shame real life people for their opinions about Elain’s character and her relationship with Lucien; victimize Elain’s character in fandom discussions; and coddle Elain’s character, which limits fandom discussions about her narrative development and prevents the ACOTAR fandom from holding Elain accountable for her actions and inactions in the same way that the fandom holds other characters accountable for their actions and inactions. It is for these reasons that I WILL NOT remove the “Elriel” tag from this post because all of the above points contribute to the toxic discourse surrounding Elain’s character.

I urge those who use these arguments to understand their implications, why they are problematic, regardless of intent, and reexamine their contributions to the ACOTAR fandom. I WILL NOT tolerate anyone who tries to twist my words and say I am attacking people and their personal shipping preferences. In fact, I AM CRITIQUING THE ARGUMENTS THEMSELVES NOT THE PEOPLE USING THE ARGUMENTS.

Also, I highly encourage the Elriel fandom to read this post because it addresses how the concept of choice as an argument enables arguments to exploit social justice and feminist languge in order to vilify Elucien shippers, among other problematic things.

Elain Archeron is one of the most polarizing characters in the ACOTAR fandom. Though opinions about Elain vary, arguments in the Elriel fandom cite society’s perception of traditional female characters in comparison to non-traditional female characters as the reason behind the hate, and this belief is used to provide an explanation as to why other characters in the series are favored over her. In the series, Elain is portrayed in a wholly positive light and this image carries over into the Elriel fandom, painting her character as a good and kind female who has been unfairly wronged and a victim of circumstances that were out of her control. When arguments in the Elriel fandom oppose other viewpoints in the fandom, they fall into one of three categories:

Category 1: Weaponize Elain’s femalehood to shame real life people for their opinions

Maybe people who hate Elain are just jealous of her in a weird way similar to when someone hates the pretty, nice, and charming girl in school just because she is too perfect

Disliking Elain is misogynistic

What happened to feminism? What happened to women supporting women? What happened to she can say no? All of that disappears the second you force Elain to be with Lucien

Elain antis are misogynistic

All Eluciens are Elain antis

Antis claiming they’re feminists when in reality they hate on Elain and Feyre but love Nesta

Elain antis are such sore losers. Y’all were that bunch of people who could not get over being rejected from hanging out with the cool kids so y’all are projecting your hatred towards pretty people now to get validation

I don’t get how Elain’s love for gardening equals boring for some people. I’m sorry your misogyny finds traditionally feminine activities boring

Why are you attacking a female? What did Elain do? Where are your feminist voices?

The fandom is misogynistic towards Elain

If people loved Elain they would ship Elriel

If you hate Elain it says a lot about your feelings toward women

If you hate Elain because she has no “development” then you must hate Azriel because otherwise you’re misogynistic

Eluciens are turned off by the idea of a woman that has the autonomy to reject a man for the simple reason that it is her choice

Eluciens are all about feminism and “it’s HER choice” until it comes down to females not wanting a male

Eluciens don’t respect Elain’s feelings when they ship her with someone that was part of her trauma and makes her feel uncomfortable

The way some Elucien shippers completely disregard how uncomfortable Elain is around Lucien is so hilariously not funny. Prioritizing being mates over Elain’s feelings is just regressive

It’s hard as a fan of Elain to see someone ship her with a person who makes her physically uncomfortable to be around. Wouldn’t you want both characters to be happy to be around each other

Imagine if SJM saw all the awful things her “stans” had to say about Elain

It’s true that we know comparatively little about her, but is she really boring or do you just not value stereotypically feminine traits?

So y’all are just gonna tell me you prefer Elucien over Elriel? Even though Lucien treats Elain as if she’s something that belongs to him? The only reason he wants to be with her is because she’s his mate, he doesn’t respect her, doesn’t treat her as his equal, even though that’s what mates should be? He doesn’t bother to look past what’s on the outside to see her for who she is. And Elain is obviously repulsed by the idea that she should belong to anyone or have no choice in who she can be with. Azriel is her friend and the only person who sees her quiet strength. He has so much faith in her, in her abilities; he’s the one who kept her company when no one else did, he’s the only one who bothered to see her for more than her brokenness. You’re going to tell me you still prefer Elucien over Elriel?

The more I see Gwynriels that ship Elucien out of their hate for Elain, the less I can understand Elain stans that ship Elucien. Pls Elain has made it very clear that she doesn’t want Lucien, why would you ship her with him? Do you hate her too? Smh

The real question would be, if you care and understand Elain why would you ship her with Lucien (where she canonically shrinks when he is near)?

People crying over Helion and Lucien’s mom not getting to be with each other and her being forced into a relationship she didn’t want, but also ship Elucien? Just say you hate Elain

When Elain’s book is out, Gwyn stans will look like clowns and I will laugh because they set her up by shipping her with Azriel just because they hate Elain. Watch them play the victims now because Elriels are clapping back the hate they’ve sent towards Elain

As romantic as wanting girl who is visibly uncomfortable around a guy who caused her trauma to end up with the said guy. Guess their standards for romance are in hell

Category 2: Victimize Elain’s character

Gwynriels only want Gwyn with Azriel because they despise Elain

Gwyn stans and Gwynriels are Elain antis

No one in the books dislike Elain, so why are there so many people who do?

Elain hasn’t done anything wrong or questionable to warrant the hate she gets

Not having Elain’s POV makes it easy for people to be swayed a certain way about her character if you already don’t relate to her in some way

It’s been years since this series came out and we haven’t gotten a lick of an Elain POV, but people still hate her for what? We don’t know her thoughts, dreams, or aspirations

We haven’t even had Elain’s perspective yet and people are passing these judgments off on her

Elain antis who say she’s boring are just cruel when she has obvious symptoms of PTSD like Feyre and Nesta

Gwyn is one of the most overhyped characters and that’s only because most people hate Elain and they couldn’t wait to find a random girl to ship Azriel with

Nesta was abusive to her sisters but Elain (who has only ever been kind) is painted as the villain

From the text we know that Elain is the epitome of feminine stereotypes (gentle, gardening, baking, non confrontational for the most part). Yet people still call her boring or deny that she has any interesting character traits?

You can’t love Nesta and hate Elain

People hate Elain because of internalized misogyny and lack of taste. All the girl does is tend to her garden and mind her business and they treat her worse than Tamlin

Does Gwyn deserve all this support? Of course yes! She is amazing! But where’s that support when Elain was in the same situation as she? Where’s that support for her right now? Why do they idolize Gwyn for her interactions with Azriel and hate Elain for having any interaction with him?

It’s not even a ship war anymore, they just hate Elain

People hate Elain for no reason

Some of y’all don’t like feminine traits and it shows

We know less about Eris and Helion but people don’t call them boring. Why would rejecting femininity make Elain more interesting?

Elain has had a lot forced upon her

The main reason I believe most people love Gwyn so much is to get Azriel away from Elain. It’s not a secret that Elain has been a widely hated character for years so suddenly we get a new female who has a minimal amount of interactions with Azriel and BOOM. New ship that once again doesn’t make sense (just like Azriel x Emerie after ACOFAS)

Elain hasn’t done something so terrible for her to get this hate. At this point some of you are just being misogynistic and you don’t want to accept it. Don’t call yourselves feminists and then say bs like this, it’s embarrassing. She’s pretty and everyone agreed to hate on her

Just a personal feeling, but I feel like a lot of the Elain hate stems from internalized misogyny. That to be a strong female lead, you need to pick up a sword and fight. That to be strong, you need to adapt traditionally masculine traits

Elain is feminine. She is beautiful. She loves to bake and garden. She is docile, quiet, observant, and a people-pleaser. All traditionally feminine traits. Yet for some reason, she’s like the worst in these people’s eyes?

I think also maybe a lot of people can’t relate to her femininity? That her being so beautiful and quiet doesn’t allow for the people who dislike her not to self-insert? Most of the hate stems from people not wanting Elain to be with Azriel. It’s mean, but maybe the people who hate Elain literally just can’t self-insert if they have a story and that’s why they’re vehemently against it?

Poor Elain. The Cauldron dealt her a bad deal. Upon emerging as Fae, she is immediately declared by Lucien as his mate, never mind that she was already engaged to a prick. Her love life is not good

It blows my mind how they really think that they can compare all the shit that Elain gets with some dumb jokes about Gwyn on Twitter (and yes, the “hate” towards her started mostly because Elriels are clapping back, it was bound to happen)

I would think of it as anti-feminist with Elain and Lucien because she has consistently stated that she does not want him so if she was forced to embrace the bond that would be taking away her right to have a choice but with Az she feels comfortable around so if they were mates then Elain would be happy and feel safe which again should be the priority for women to feel safe in their relationships with anything and to not be forced into any type of situation aka the mating bond in this

Category 3: Coddle Elain’s character

Elain has value the way she is, in all her domestic girly glory. Not every character has to be badass

We don’t speak of Elain’s flaws frequently because everyone else already speaks badly of her, mainly in an unfair way

There is definitely something deeper going on with Elain but by no means will she ever be evil or any less feminine. That goes against everything we already know about her

It’s ok to critique Elain because she needs growth but y’all keep forgetting the shit her and her sisters went through

The last “bad” thing Elain did in ACOTAR was not help Feyre when they were impoverished and I’m tired of people acting like she’s a terrible character when it was their father’s responsibility. It happened 4 books ago and Feyre has forgiven both Nesta and Elain

Elain’s character and the evil Elain theory are a great example of the trend where people only consider female characters interesting if they reject femininity

We don’t know enough to hate Elain

Many people want Elain to turn evil (which in my opinion seems to come from a place of internalized misogyny)

However we don’t tend to talk about her faults, at least not publicly, as that has been, and still is, done to death, and I--personally, at least--find it much more fun to theorise about potentially interesting aspects of the overall plot, than dwell on negatives

And ultimately, I would be shocked if Elain has a more karmically-charged story than Nesta, considering that Elain’s “wrongs” are so much less severe and bad than Nesta’s, and Elain has already apologized for them (or paid the price in other ways, like through what Graysen did)

I guess I also think Elain has suffered and been punished enough. I hope her story is about finding hope in terrible situations, and learning to love her new life, and choosing her own path after everything that has been done to her. I don’t think she needs to be punished anymore or face any additional trauma

Also, why is she being judged on her decisions as a human at all? Fae are monsters to humans! They enslaved them for thousands of years, and the Wall was erected to keep them out

Like I’m sorry, but think Elain would want to leave her ONLY FAMILY AND FRIENDS for the Spring Court where she has no one because--oh look, lots of flowers!--is the craziest thing I have ever heard

Her sisters are in the Night Court. Her nephew is in the Night Court. Her closest friends (Nuala and Cerridwen) are in the Night Court. Her love interest is in the Night Court. Her extended family is in the Night Court. Her home is in the Night Court

SJM isn’t going to keep two sisters together and split up the third. Especially not keep Feyre and Nesta together and separate Elain. They were either all going to end up in separate places, or together. Not 2 here and 1 there

Compared to the other female characters in the series, Elain is the only character whose femalehood is at the center of conversations; this is because arguments in the Elriel fandom fixate on it when discussing her character. While Elain, Feyre, Nesta, and Mor are all representations of white womanhood and white beauty, Elain epitomizes the most fragile version of white womanhood. It’s easy to blame society’s perception of traditional female characters in comparison to non-traditional female characters when it comes to the discourse surrounding Elain’s character because it: falls in line with the fixation on Elain’s femalehood to silence opposing viewpoints; is a simplistic explanation that fails to tackle the underlying issues with Elain as a character, the same issues that are downplayed in-universe; absolves Elain of her wrongdoings; prevents the ACOTAR fandom from holding Elain accountable for her actions and inactions within the series; and diminishes the impact Elain’s actions and inactions have on those around her. It’s not that Elain is hated in the fandom because she’s a traditional female character; it’s the fact that arguments in the Elriel fandom deflect a critical analysis of Elain’s character because she’s a traditional female character who embodies the ideal white woman in need of protection. White fans and white-aligned fans of color, especially white women, have a tendency to vehemently defend, gatekeep, and coddle white female characters in fandom; this makes it difficult for other fans to engage in critical discussions about these white female characters because they’re viewed as flawless and all around perfect characters despite evidence to the contrary. Since Elain is viewed positively by the other characters in the series, it has rendered her character untouchable to any perceived slight or criticism in fandom discussions because those negative opinions challenge what has been said about her character thus far. And as a result, her character has been placed on a pedestal and implicitly hailed as the epitome of white womanhood; and when she’s criticized, it’s seen as a direct attack against white womanhood. Arguments in the Elriel fandom: exploit feminist language and perpetuate white feminist tactics under the guise of defending Elain’s character; center Elain in conversations about female oppression in the ACOTAR world and uphold white feminist ideologies in their critique of ACOTAR’s patriarchal society; and use the fragile white woman narrative to victimize Elain in Lucien’s presence, playing into racial biases that are associated with white supremacy’s defense of white womanhood.

Feminism is a social movement that seeks to promote equality and equity to all genders, and feminists work toward eradicating gender disparities on a macro-level, in addition to challenging gender biases on a micro-level. As feminism became more mainstream, a flat and oversimplified version of feminism emerged: mainstream feminism. The mainstream feminist movement is meant to represent all women, but rarely does it center conversations around issues that concern most women. The problem with mainstream feminism is that it’s just a popularized version of white feminism. White feminism has relied extensively on an individualized understanding of women’s oppression, exclusively from the lens of privileged white women. White feminism only focuses on the oppression experienced by white, able-bodied, affluent, educated, cishet women; and it views gender as the key mode of privileged white women’s oppression, isolated from the privileges granted by their other social identities. White women can be and are oppressed under the patriarchy but only because they are women; their identity as women does not exempt them from the privileges granted by their whiteness. The term white feminist does not mean any feminist who is white, but refers to feminists who prioritize the concerns of privileged white women as though they are representative of all women. However, the term is not exclusive to white people. Because white feminism is so pervasive, people of other racial and ethnic backgrounds often buy into white feminism, believing that if they work hard enough, they may be able to reap its rewards.

Just like white feminism, mainstream feminism only recognizes the identity of being a woman, assumes that all women share common experiences of gender oppression, fails to address other social identities in relation to overlapping systems of oppression, and disregards privilege in relation to various social identities. Just like white feminism, mainstream feminism is palatable because it doesn’t seek to challenge the systems in place, instead its goal is to succeed within them. Essentially, mainstream feminism and white feminism are extensions of performative feminism. Performative feminism is a type of performative activism that’s used to describe feminist views that are surface level and solely for the benefit of one type of person. It’s a pretense which often has nothing to do with genuine activism. Arguments in the Elriel fandom normalize and promote performative feminism because the topic of feminism is only referenced when discussing Elain. This indicates that these arguments are engaging in disingenuous discourse to push a personal agenda within the ACOTAR fandom, and it becomes more apparent when they use white feminist tactics to shut down opposing viewpoints:

White feminists weaponize and exploit feminist language to silence the opinions of other women, especially when they’re called out for their problematic behaviors

White feminists use the phrase “Women supporting women” to defend other white feminists who exhibit problematic behaviors instead of holding them accountable

White feminists weaponize phrases like “Women supporting women” and “You just hate women” to attack other women who disagree with them on any given topic

White feminists use phrases like “All women face challenges” and “Stop pitting women against each other” to sidestep conversations about privilege

White feminists divert conversations away from privilege and towards the Trauma Olympics to equate their struggles to the oppression of marginalized people

White feminists skirt around the realities of other forms of oppression and discrimination, downplaying the experiences of marginalized people

White feminists diminish or ignore the ways in which gender oppression affects other marginalized people

White feminists paint those they harmed as aggressive, mean, or divisive when confronted with the ways they have harmed a marginalized group

White feminists deflect criticism by focusing on the anger or emotions being expressed rather than the issue that is being discussed, invalidating the concerns of marginalized people

White feminists speak over marginalized voices in an attempt to sound “woke”

White feminists get defensive and insist there’s no way they could be a part of the problem because of what they’ve done to help marginalized groups already

White feminists say they don’t see color in an attempt to obscure racial issues that need to be addressed

White feminists center and victimize themselves in conversations about racism, which derails necessary conversations from taking place

White feminists who are white weaponize the intersectionality of their race and gender to avoid accountability

Feminism is not meant to be approached from an individualistic perspective nor is it only about addressing the experiences of privileged white women, it involves addressing the intersections of race, class, gender, sexuality, (dis)ability, and other social identities as well; and it involves addressing how these social identities relate to privilege. Moreover, feminism is not about women upholding complete loyalty to other women because of a shared gender identity, and to claim that it does implies that women should be held to different emotional standards than men. If men are able to dislike and criticize other individual men, real or fictional, without their characters being compromised, why aren’t women granted that same privilege?

It’s clear that SJM set up the ACOTAR world to mirror a patriarchal society, and that the imbalance of power between males and females stems from sexism. Arguments in the Elriel fandom analyze the ACOTAR world through a feminist lens to show how ACOTAR’s patriarchal society, to which the mating bond is innately tied, contributes to female oppression and limits their agency. When choice and free will are emphasized as part of Elain’s arc, they imply that Elain, through the mating bond, experiences female oppression under ACOTAR’s patriarchal society because of her identity as a female with that identity being the focal point of her oppression in the world. Elain is one of the most privileged characters in the ACOTAR world: she’s High Fae; she’s the sister of the High Lord and High Lady of the Night Court, which gives her access to wealth and political influence because of that connection; she’s able-bodied; she was magically blessed by the Cauldron; and she lives in Velaris, a place that grants females autonomy and power because of the beliefs of Rhysand and Feyre. Arguments in the Elriel fandom trivialize female oppression in the ACOTAR world because they disregard the fact that Elain’s privileges prevent her from experiencing female oppression in the same way that other marginalized females in the world do. The mating bond being one such example because those around Elain are not forcing the bond on her, instead they’re allowing Elain to reach a decision about the bond for herself; a privilege that other marginalized females in the world probably wouldn’t have. Just because Elain has endured hardships in her life and is a female in a patriarchal society, they do not erase the privileges she holds within the ACOTAR world. The failure to include Elain’s privileges in discussions about Elain being a female in a patriarchal society feeds into white feminist ideologies because white feminism operates from a very narrow perspective; it doesn’t take other intersecting identities into account when it examines gender oppression, leaving no room for discussions about privilege (or lack thereof) in relation to those intersecting identities. When discussing oppression in hierarchical societies, it’s imperative that privilege is also included in the conversation because privilege and oppression are not mutually exclusive; they equally affect the ways in which people navigate those societies through their social identities.

Rather than attributing Elain’s uncomfortability to her new life as a Fae female or the mating bond itself and her trauma to the Cauldron, the King of Hybern, or Ianthe, they’re placed on Lucien to cast his character in a negative light. Moreover, fandom discussions portray Lucien as a possessive character to further emphasize Elain’s discomfort despite the inaccuracy of this characterization in canon. Arguments in the Elriel fandom play into racial biases when it comes to Lucien (a male character of color) because they mischaracterize his character in order to victimize Elain (a white female character), placing her character in the role of the white damsel in distress. In Western society, the concept of womanhood has been conceptualized from a Eurocentric perspective with femininity and feminine attributes favoring white women. It’s the idea that a certain type of femininity is only inherent to white women as they are seen as the embodiment of an ideal womanhood. White womanhood has been a symbol of innocence and purity, and white women have been viewed as fragile beings in need of protection. The reason white womanhood functions within white supremacy is because it’s the same idea that has motivated white men to kill and beat black and brown men. The so-called protection of white women has been used as a justification for the horrific violence committed by white men because black and brown men were stereotyped as aggressive and seen as a threat to the virtue of white women. The white damsel in distress trope considered white women as worthy of protection because of their perceived innocence and purity; women of color were not granted that same treatment because they did not fit into the ideal image of womanhood. Over the years, this trope became a means for white women to exercise limited power in a patriarchal society with white women weaponizing their status as the damsel much to the detriment of black and brown men. It’s through the white damsel in distress trope that white supremacy sustains its dominance in Western society. The misrepresentation of characters of color in fandom, the dismissal of their importance to the overall story, and using them as tools in arguments centered around white characters are the foundation of fandom racism; they’re examples of how racism moves silently in fandom spaces. Instead of examining their behavior and taking constructive criticism from fans of color, white fans will often double down on their bigotry and center their uncomfortability in the conversation when confronted with their complicity in fandom racism. White fans expect fans of color to swallow fandom racism in its many forms in order to not ruin the experience of fandom, dismissing the fact that racism is prevalent in nearly every aspect of society. This mentality ensures that no one is held accountable for the harm they caused and alienates fans of color in fandom spaces.

To reiterate what I mentioned in my first think piece: terms like “oppression”, “the right to choose”, “feminist”, “feminism”, “anti-feminist”, “anti-feminism”, “internalized misogyny”, “misogyny”, “misogynist”, “sexist”, “sexism”, “racist”, “racism”, “classist”, “classism”, “discrimination”, and “patriarchy” are all used in specific ways to draw attention to the plight of marginalized people and challenge those who deny the existence of systems of oppression. Yet these words and their meanings can be twisted to attack, exclude, and invalidate people with differing opinions on any given topic. When social justice and feminist terms are thrown around antagonistically and carelessly to push a personal agenda, it becomes clear that these terms are being used to engage in disingenuous discourse and pursue personal validation rather than being used out of any deep-seated conviction to dismantle systemic oppression. Being an ally, activist, or feminist is not an identity, it’s a practice. It requires: ongoing self-reflection; holding ourselves accountable; listening to marginalized people; educating ourselves; dismantling implicit biases; challenging those around us who are exhibiting problematic behaviors; and action behind our words.

It’s important to be aware of the language that is used within the fandom when defending or critiquing characters and ships. It’s also important to question how an argument is framed and why it’s framed the way that it is to critically examine the intent behind that argument: is it used as a tool to push a personal agenda that reinforces problematic behaviors, or is it used as an opportunity to share, learn, enlighten, and educate?

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Tagging: @spell-cleavers @bookofmirth @m0bulidae @ilya-boltagon

#elain archeron #elriel #acotar fandom #acotar: fandom critical

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sn0tcl0wn · 3 years

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age gap romance flicks are usually iffy at best and horrible at worst with a few good ones in between and usually they're about an 18 year old dating an older person but way too often there are movies about adults dating minors and it bothers me for the obvious reasons but what gets to me the how the fanbase is usually more adults than minors. and like no i dont want minors consuming that shit but like many people as a kid i personally had fantasies about a hot older person falling for me and having a forbidden romance with me. it's a silly teenage fantasy that shouldn't come true but isn't inherently harmful to have as a kid because of course you're gonna be attracted to adults in your teens, it's normal and healthy to be attracted to adults and fine to even prefer them over your less matured and still growing peers.

what obviously isn't okay is dating them but even that isn't on the teenager because they literally do not know better outside of it being illegal. they don't usually get why or want to get why when they're caught up in their hormonal adolescent emotions. but unfortunately the people making this age gap shit and the main demographic for it are not minors getting catharsis. it's adults. grown ass adults in their grown ass ages are the ones most excited for these things to come out. they're the ones recommending this shit, sometimes even to minors, thinking it's good stuff and entertainment that normal people would want to consume. and it just really fucking gets to me that there are so many age gap romances like that with fanbases consisting mostly of adult women who think it's enjoyable to see and read these things play out.

and even if it does end sad or there's some kind of moment of clarity, it doesn't erase the good cinematography/acting/writng/love scenes/general aesthetic which those people relate to. like seeing a grown ass woman hyped for a movie where a woman in her age group grooms a kid ten years her junior is deeply disturbing to me but what gets me even more is knowing how many others out there are like her and how quick she and many of them are and will be to snap at anyone questioning the morality and validity of using such a concept for a quarter life crisis genre dramcom. like is that what your quarter life crises are doing to you? can't relate you sick fucks, get help and grow the fuck up if you think that does anything for you other than make you look like a creepy emotionally stunted weirdo just like all the older dudes trying to fuck younger chicks. you're honestly worse than those guys because i truly believe that women should fucking know better considering how vigilant and aware of predators girlhood makes you.

it's not just a moral failure, it honestly feels like betrayal when women do that shit. like women of all people spent their teens dealing with those exact types of men hurting them and their friends so to see women excited to see the roles reversed and not feeling the amount of discomfort i know they would if it mirrored their experiences shows that they don't actually care about these things, they just cared when there was a possibility it would happen to them. and i just KNOW a lot of these sick fucks are gonna whine about how "it's ~different~" somehow when the discourse gets heated. and it's fuckin gonna.

you can't just make movies like that anymore no matter how much you try to demonize the older character in the text, there's been a serious rise in people coming out against and about being groomed and this sudden public awareness means a movie like that is gonna be heavily scrutinized and discussed in a manner that ties back to the real life issue at hand. maybe you could have gone under the radar with this ten or so years ago but you cannot make or enjoy a film like that without being put under the microscope and treated like a potential perpetrator by the majority. people stopped taking chances these past couple of years and backlogs of abuse done by public going back three decades are coming out of the woodwork every day with people being quicker to take the sides of victims. if aren't an abuser but still like that shit people aren't gonna just trust you unless they're in the same boat as you and enjoy that kind of gross shit, literal children, or actual predators thinking you're one of them and that is not a good look for you. people will drag it up in arguments and always treat you like a possible abuser to be weary of. you literally cannot make or enjoy that shit anymore and tbh i don't even know why you would with everything that's come out regarding that kind of abuse and relationship toxicity.

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incorrectallpersonaquotes · 4 years

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About Naoto Shirogane, Persona 4 Golden spoilers

Hello, everyone!

We received a message yesterday, about an anon saying that they will unfollow our blog since we don't believe Naoto is trans and we bought into terf rhetoric (their words, not ours). Because of our last quote, where Kanji trated Naoto using feminine pronouns (here: https://incorrectallpersonaquotes.tumblr.com/post/625297384610676736/kanji-naoto-do-i-have-a-thing-for-her-no ).

In respect of people who see Naoto as trans, we're gonna use male pronouns here in this post, even thought this post will basically explain why we use feminine pronouns with Naoto here. Just a quick clarify: this blog is run by me (Estel) and my fianceé (Babi Eve).

I think Naoto should be trans. Atlus could have done something great there. His whole story can be easily interpreted as a trans metaphor.

The thing is. In canon, Naoto is not trans. His whole issue is about gender roles, not gender identity. He wanted to be a detective, but he would not be taken seriously if he presented himself as a girl. So, he assumed a male identity. In all his Social Link, it’s very clear that his struggle is about gender roles, about how easier things would be if he was born in a body of someone who would be instantly identified as a man (if he was a cis man), because nobody would question him about it in his detective work. Honestly, I think Naoto just wants to be a detective, and he would not have issues with this if society wasn’t male-oriented. And well, that’s the canon. In Persona 4 Dancing, and even in the future pic in Persona 4 Golden, he doesn’t use his binder anymore.

That is the canon part. Aside from this, I acknowledge that Persona 4 is very transphobic and homophobic. It tries to do things right, but fails a lot. Like, it tries to do something good in gender aspect with Naoto, but it doesn’t help when everyone starts treating him on feminine the instant they discover he’s not a cis boy, even to the point of fetishizing it. The whole thing on his romantic route, being possible to see him in the feminine uniform in Christmas Eve, when he asks what pronouns you prefer to call him, and even having the need to say “I’m glad you’re a girl“ to unlock the romantic route, is all shitty, sexist and transphobic. We can say a lot about Kanji and Yosuke too (regarding homophobia) and about the girls (by far, the most sexist-oriented cast in Persona series), but I’ll not talk about it here, that’s another talk.

Don't get us wrong, we love Persona 4 (even though we love 3 and 5 more). We acknowledge its bad points, but also the many good points. It is a great game, with a great story and many wonderful characters. But precisely because we love it, we also shouldn't ignore its bad points. The same for Persona 3 and 5, although we believe 4 is the one who makes more mistakes in that sense.

I’ve talked to trans people about Naoto. People who didn’t play the game because of what they heard about him, and people who actually played it as well. The main agreement is that Naoto is canonically not trans, but most trans people prefer to ignore canon since it’s transphobic. And I don’t think these people are wrong in doing so. My personal opinion is that, while the way people interact with him is transphobic, his character as a whole isn’t. It’s not something from another world a character who rejects gender roles and tries to escape it by pretending to be of other gender, even if they don’t necessarily identify with said gender. Mulan, Safiri (from Princess Knight, by Osamu Tezuka) are the first examples that come to my head. That’s my opinion. My fianceé, on the other hand, prefer to think of Naoto as non-binary. I like this idea as well. I’m open for any ideas regarding Naoto, he’s an amazing character.

But in this blog, we’re not just doing it for us, we’re doing things to reach fans. So, while it is inevitable that we end up putting personal touch here and there (like, we make a lot of JokerXCrow here, since we love them and cosplay them), we also try to make stuff in a way that most people can identify. So, if Naoto canonically uses feminine pronouns (after being revealed his sex), we’re gonna use feminine pronouns here, except for specific quotes that happen before his sex is revealed in-game. And even so, we DO have some quotes here, waiting to be posted, playing with the idea of a non-binary Naoto.

So, we just wanted to say. We do NOT think you're wrong if you believe Naoto is trans. Naoto canonically isn't, but who gives a shit about canon? Your opinion is valid, and we love it. We're just clarifying that, while we prefer to use his canon pronouns, we have no problem whatsoever with the idea or concept of trans Naoto. If you don't agree with us and prefer to unfollow, that's fair. We welcome everyone here, but we understand if you want to unfollow for any reason. And also, we DO NOT agree with the "not doing discourse" stuff that the anon assumed we would say. Social matters are inevitably linked to Persona. Ignoring it would miss the whole point of the series. So, we wanted to post this to clarify things.

Thank you so much! Also, we're sorry for being absent for so long. We have over 100 quotes ready to be posted, I'm just a lazy prick who constantly forgets to add it to the queue.

#Persona 4 #Persona 4 Golden #Naoto Shirogane #trans #transgender #spoilers #lgbtqiia+

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thepropertylovers · 4 years

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What Foreigners Really Think of The U.S. Right Now

The other night, after the kiddos went to bed, we decided to watch the second Borat movie that just came out (have you seen it?). It was insane and hilarious all at the same time, but it got me wondering: what do folks who don’t live in the U.S. think of The United States of America right now? What is their perception of us?

So I decided to pose this question on Instagram and wow. Y’all did not hold back. I want to thank everyone who submitted for your candidness and honesty, even if some of these were hard to swallow. It’s important to note that just because these are their opinions of America, it doesn’t mean it is all necessarily true. Regardless, it was interesting to read everyone’s thoughts and get an outsider’s perspective.

We received hundreds of submissions and couldn’t post them all, but below, people from all over the world share what they really think of the United States at the moment.

Leadership is out of touch with reality and messing things up real bad, not just for the U.S. but also for the world. What’s worse is that half the country is being misled successfully. It just shows poorly on the country all over. -Annonymous

Your president is a disaster when it comes to foreign politics and corona. No class, no knowledge. A joke. Very scary to watch. But half of the voters are happy with it. And that is even more scary. Very difficult to understand the hate and ignorance in your society right now. -Mikkel

It’s just weird. Everything basically. I totally understand now why the U.S. is described as '“flawed democracy” in the democracy index. It’s just a crazy system which is not providing equality among people- regarding the vote especially. This system leads to the fact of the two big parties (similar in the UK basically). But democracy is about diversity in opinions and options. Not just two. -Max

The US is more divided than ever. The two parties cannot work together nor do they appear to want to. The government is no longer run by reason, facts, and policy aiming for the betterment of the entire country and or world in the long or medium run; rather it’s instant gratification for the few who benefit from nepotism. Lies and misinformation are used to build a dictatorship hiding in the form of “patriotism”. And those who could act as a check or balance focus on their own personal gain, putting their needs above those of the persons they should be representing. -Joel

I personally don’t think there is a very good atmosphere in the USA, especially right now, Trump’s administration does not protect the American people or the economy. He only cares about himself and his male-white supremacy. The worst of all is that lots of Americans think Trump is actually a good leader (idk why, honestly). But thank God that people are starting to wake up and fight about what they believe. We can see it through BLM protests, feminist movements, and so on, and the whole world is proud about those people fighting for their rights. America was once the land of dreams, but nowadays (with all that is happening) it is even scary to go there. Lots of things have to change and those changes have to start, voting and defending your rights and your beliefs are the first step. Greetings from Spain. -Antonio

The main reasons I can think of are vote suppression/gerrymandering, expensive health care wealth inequality, racism, lack of fun control… -Brian

Definitely find the hypocrisy of the Republicans so annoying, Trump still being in office, the fact that there has been no police reform or justice for Breonna Taylor, the gun laws, and the COVID numbers just to name a few. -Brian

Here in the UK it seems like CARNAGE over there..don’t get me wrong, it’s wild here too but Trump is insane and it’s really odd seeing so many Americans supporting him. -Dan

Really worried about the fact that you might go for 4 more years with Trump and the fact that he’ll for sure contest the results if he loses. Add to this, all the racial violence and in particular the way some policemen act without being condemned by any judge. And finally the pandemic which seems to be even more out of control than in other countries. This is coming from someone who lives in France where we’re going to be under lockdown for the second time since the beginning of the pandemic (2nd lockdown starting tomorrow evening and will last at least until December 1st 😢). -Estelle

To put a long story short, let’s just hope Cheeto doesn’t get reelected otherwise our UK trade deal will be a disaster and we don’t need any more negative influences in the UK around gender and sexual equality.-Christian

I think with this administration, the US has demonstrated how to shipwreck a whole nation economically, ideologically, socially, and politically within a really short period of time. After just 4 years, we’ve come to associate the US with widespread narrow-mindedness, a lack of respect and courtesy to other nations (and minorities in its own country for that matter), short sightedness when it comes to global phenomena like environmentalism or migration patterns, and a celebration (by some at least) of almost barbaric notions of violence, oppression, and backward thinking, all under the camouflage of its constitution and socio-historic heritage. We’ve really admired the Obama administration over here in Europe, which-despite its flaws and shortcomings- has opened up the US to international partnerships and has established an ongoing discourse shaped by mutual respect and politeness…the contrast couldn’t be more pronounced these day…-Sebastian

I look at our Prime Minister and government and then see Trump and think we really could have it so much worse! Vote!! -Ant

As an American living in London, I can tell you that the news coverage here makes the US look like an absolute joke. Mainly due to 45, his lies, his bigotry, and his insane desire to make covid seem as though it’s a falsehood “created by the left” while hundreds of thousands of Americans have ben victimized by this pandemic. What was once seen as a country of opportunity and freedom, is sadly no longer held to that level of greatness in comparison to its neighboring countries. It saddens me because I had plans to move back home within the next year or so, but if the US continues on its path, I can see myself in London for the unforeseeable future. I can’t live in a country where I am seen or believed to be lesser than another because of my sexual preference. I can only hope and pray that this election brings the change we need to be that country of greatness once again. -Rob

Very poor to be honest. And I’m not necessarily [talking about Trump]- I think the immediate reaction is to blame him. Though, he is pretty awful. There was obviously a huge level of social and other problems in the US, and the current administration has exploited them to the breaking point. Whereas more “skilled” past administrations had the ability to leverage those issues for their benefit, but not let it boil over. I actually thought Trump would be a positive for the US and world- in that his incompetence would force other world leaders to step up. Meaning more equity in how disputes etc. are assessed and the US wouldn’t bully smaller nations. I think the US has hit the point in its journey with capitalism that the USSR hit with socialism in the late 80’s that led to its collapse. Does that mean collapse for the US, I don’t know but the system isn’t providing equity and equality for all as it stands. -Paul

Worried but also hopeful for you guys because I don’t think all citizens in America reflect the current administration. It’s been really great to see people voting early and making their voice heard. No matter what happens just know you did what you could in this moment in time. Even though the current administration provides a scary outlook for the future. As long as the current and future generations lead with love, there will hopefully be a brighter future. Love from Canada. -Ajetha

I've been subscribing to all of the US News since the Black Lives Matter Movement commenced and honestly, it made me scared as a Filipino Asian to step foot in the States ever since. I have big dreams of flying over there and probably working there as an immigrant after I finished college. However, when I found out about the racial injustice that is currently ongoing in the country, I became hesistant of still wanting to live there. Although, I'm positive that there are still people like you two that will be open about working immigrants, I really hope that racism, sexism, homophobia and transphobia will end for good among every human beings in the US and also around the world. I do wish and pray that the 2020 US election will make certain amends to the current situation y'all are experiencing because it's getting pretty scary out there. -Harvey I’m an American living overseas working for the US government. I’m trying my hardest to stay overseas so my family and I don’t have to come back to the mess that is the US right now. From politics to COVID, it’s not a good time. While the virus may be surging again in Europe, at least the people comply with the government rules. Sometimes I believe Americans take freedom and liberty a bit too far, especially when it comes to the greater good. -Anonymous

Allthough on social policy the US is no real example for us (I think there is more social ‘security’, more justice, high standards in education for all in most of the EU countries), they always have been a ‘safe haven’ in big international politics. It now feels like ‘they have our back’ doesn’t imply anymore. -Jasper

Well personally I think the country seems in total disarray, instead of focusing on the real issues in the streets both house of the capitol are focused on bashing each other during the election campaign which is a circus due to the sitting POTUS. The obsession with the right to bare arms and the gun culture bewilders most other countries, you have teenagers walking into schools with Assault weapons and yet people still want guns to be available, worst still you ban one type of assault rifle but another just as powerful is kept on sale, it’s plain weird. -Philip

Neither candidate represents their party well. As an outsider looking in, it just baffles me that either of these men could potentially be the leader of the free world...It genuinely feels like worrying times are ahead for the US. -Marc I'm from India and living in Germany at the moment. The race problem in the US is as bad as the class/caste problem in India. Even if I don't have money I can go to a government health center in India. I just had an operation and stayed at the hospital for 18 days here in Germany, I had to pay only 180 Euros, everything else ( the operation and the many tests and scans that followed) was covered by the insurance. When my friends at the US heard about it they were shocked about low the hospital bill. There are really great labs (I'm a researcher) that I would like to work but I have no intentions of working/living in the US for a longer period of time. -Maithy

I think the US has become a joke to the rest of the developed world. Neither candidates running for president are fit to run such a powerful country. I can't help but feel after the election if Trump wins the left will riot and if Biden wins the right will riot. The country might just rip itself apart. American politics has zero empathy and zero morals. Honestly its terrifying. -Andrew

The US has always been a bit confusing to me - the two party system, the focus on religion, the divide in income and possibilities- as well as being the beacon of light in the fight for human rights, the strong personal pride in creating caring societets, the blending of and openeses for ethnicities and cultures... But for a while politics have become not at all about politics, religious beliefs are taking charge in policy work, the wealthier part shows little companion towards the less wealthy, the public spending is way above budget year after year while health care seems to be crazy expensive and not for all. The intrusion of US interest in politics in other countries are blunt to say the least, creating conflict where human lives have no value if they’re not US lives... School shootings that seems to be acted upon as that is part of normal lives, and schools to expensive for even middle class kids to study at... This is a shift in trust and soft power that affects all of us. -Olof

To be honest, I couldn’t come to the US right now, it scares me. The leadership, the gun laws, the violence and the divide of the nation. It sucks, because I love America and have been there 7 times in the last two years from Australia for work... but not anymore. I’m not coming back now until peace wins. -Anonymous

The fact that such a hate filled government is presiding over what is one the greatest countries in the world is scary. And it is seriously mind blowing that out of such a powerful country filled with some of the greatest minds in the world it’s these two men are the best you can do to be your next president. Unbelievable. Seriously unbelievable. -Rachel

I think the orange dude in office is making you guys look bad. But also, good (?). Seeing the black lives matter movement and so many of you stand up to the problems your country faces has been inspiring. One thing our countries have in common is how we are divided into very distinctive opposites sides. I mean, where do all these racists, bigots, utterly, madly conservites people came from? I few like a few years ago things did not seem so much as a boiling pan about to explode. Or maybe they were all hiding and when a lunatic like them rose to power (how that happened still boggles my mind) they all showed their true colors. It’s scary. I hope Trump doesn’t get reelected. Brazilians loooove to imitate americans🙄, so if he gets reelected it makes that much probable that our lunatic will also be in office for four more years. P.S. have you guys watched the show Years and Years from HBO? A really good watch is this election times! ☺️ -Taty

Re. The US atm. Unfortunately your president has made your country a laughing stock around the world and he's destroyed relationships with allies. It's gonna take time to rebuild all of that. He's also moved an entire branch of your government to the far right, even though the majority of the country if left/centr of left. So you've a supreme court that doesn't represent you and it's looking like they're going to try and take away rights from people. You have a healthcare system that doesn't look out for its people and there's this bizarre fear of universal healthcare that seems insane to every other 1st world country. If if Biden wins (and I really hope he does for everyone's sake), there's going to be a lot of work in undoing the damage Trump has done before he can even get into what he wants to do. All the while you've an ultra conservative highest court. There's also the massive political division and the systemic racism. It's a lot. It's not impossible, but it's going to take so much time and people who want it to change. -Ciara

I’ve been sitting here for an hour thinking about your question and there are many different outlooks I could raise so I’ll keep it generic. I’ll start with the elephant in the room known as Covid. Each day, our morning news informs us of what your leaders are doing and daily case numbers in the US. We sit here completely shocked at how your government has let it reach this point. You may have heard that Melbourne has just come out of one of the strictest and longest lock downs in the world. I wouldn’t wish that upon anyone to have to do, but I will say, I feel much more comfortable to be able to go to the shops knowing the numbers are at about 2-3 a day instead of in the thousands. I do think that your government does need to address this now, could even be making it compulsory mask wearing. It’s hard for me to comment about your economy as we don’t here much about it, but I will say Trump ‘says’ make America great again, let’s get more jobs, they are pro life, yet how is someone who is prolife not doing anything to stop a virus that is killing people? Isn’t your unemployment rate worse (pre-covid) than what it was when Obama was president? I think as a generic outlook, if change isn’t made in the election, the outlook from a Australian does not look like it would be something you’d want to be apart of. I love America. Have visited a couple of times, even thought about moving there, but at the moment, I’ve never been more thankful to not be there. -Ben

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iaintyourbro · 4 years

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So Your Ship (or Theory) Isn’t Canon

The day comes where you find out that your ship is not the canon pairing. It’s a sad day, you go through the stages of grief.

“BUT EVERYTHING WAS POINTING TO THIS!”

Except, it probably wasn’t.

This is how I had to deal with it a few times, and why it didn’t ruin the overall story for me. Full disclosure: None of these are considered “Main” pairings.

Okay, let’s talk about the only couple I really cared about for FF7 back in the day: Vincent and Lucrecia

Like most rational people, I have a very deep adoration for Mr. Valentine. I had a wall scroll of him in my room. He was mysterious, powerful, and my God, I’d say he was pretty effing romantic. I was also 12, but WHATEVER.

I played OG, got Vincent, saw the Waterfall scene and I was like “THIS MAN DESERVES TO GET THIS WOMAN.”

So, as we all know, the OG didn’t go in to a ton of detail about this whole thing. That didn’t really come until DoC, which of course, I didn’t play at that point. It wasn’t even out yet. And then I didn’t play it when it came out because I didn’t want to play a shooter game.

They tell you that Hojo marries Lucrecia and that Sephiroth is his son. But then you have me that creates a theory based on a fanfiction ( That was a great fanfiction and I have no idea what it’s called because I read it 20 years ago.. ).

My theory became: Vincent was actually Sephiroth’s father. It was the only rational explanation, right?

Who would sleep with Hojo? He’s gross. Very gross.

So, in my head, Vincent and Lucrecia did have some type of relationship and Hojo had forced her to marry him. BUT WAIT - she was already pregnant with Vincent’s child. Lucrecia played it off like it was Hojo’s, but he had his suspicions. Not that he cared, this was an experiment. He didn’t care about anybody.

So I sat with my theory about Vincent being Sephiroth’s father, and that his sins went deeper than just not being able to stop Lucrecia and Hojo from experimenting. And Vincent suspected it too, so it wasn’t a complete mystery. In this theory, Vincent heavily suspected that he was Sephiroth’s father.

I think I replayed OG a few years ago when it came out on Switch. Once again, my love of Vincent came back. **I’m realizing that I probably did like Cloti even 20 years ago, but it was overtaken by my love of Vincent in my memories**

So I get online and am searching for Vincent things. Specifically about him being Sephiroth’s dad. And I came across it... the post proving it wasn’t canon. That the devs had done an interview and flat out said “No, Vincent isn’t Sephiroth’s father.” And if this was an episode of Maury, some folks may have jumped for joy.

I was actually hurt. Like, this can’t be right. Why wouldn’t they add that level of drama? But it wasn’t. It wasn’t canon, it was pure fanon. I’ve believed this for like 15 years. So I felt defeated.

And part of it was being wrong, which I think is a huge motivator for these ship wars. Nobody likes to be wrong. We are all human, after all.

And I did go through about a 10 minute thing of eff that game. But guess what, I looked at it again. I actually watched DoC cut scenes (finally) and it made sense. It’s clear, it’s canon that Hojo is Sephiroth’s father.

However, that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy that theory on my own, along with whoever else does. Fanfiction, fanart, playful discourse online about it.

And that was fine. It didn’t ruin the game for me once I took a step back from my own theory, my own head, and looked at it as a whole.

DoC did change my opinion of Lucrecia. For some reason I thought she was this nice lady.

I even named my main World of Warcraft toon after her. I still have that toon, it’s still my main.

But I was kinda like “damn she’s gonna play him like that?” And I wasn’t mad at the story anymore, I was mad at Lucrecia. But, what’s nice about that whole thing is, as the story continued in DoC, you found out she regrets her choice. She feels guilty about Vincent’s father’s death, so then goes crazy trying to save Vincent. Her “husband” treats her like trash, so then I REALLY hated him.

But I thought it was a good thing to make sure I reviewed all of the canon resources for Vincent and Lucrecia.

I will still eat up a good fanfiction of Vincent being the daddy, though. I just will not ruin or twist the story of FF7 as it was written for it to fit that narrative. Doesn’t make me like it any less!

My next contenders, though not as serious as the above: Zell and Selphie from FF8

I don’t know why. It was pretty obvious that the game showed Zell and Library Girl with the Pigtail (I mean, they could have at least given this chick a name) and Selphie and Irvine. And I knew that playing it. But in fanon land, I preferred Zell and Selphie. Something about them made them cute to me. Irvine and Quistis I’d generally pair up too. I have no idea why to this day, maybe just to stick people together. But even more than Irvine and Quistis I liked the idea of Seifer and Quistis. That became the thing.

In any case, I never was upset playing the game and it never showing a single scene between those fanon couples. I loved FF8, still do. The only reason 7 overtook it was because of Remake. I still love the idea of Zell and Selphie together.

Okay, this one actually I did have a hard time with: Psych

I wanted Shawn and Jules together by like episode 5 of that series. You want to talk about a slow burn? Those two. Shawn had other girlfriends. Jules had people. They’d still clearly have this tension. You’re like wtf guys. Come on.

When he needs to choose to save his gf (Abigail who I legit just found out was played by Rachel Leigh Cook) vs Jules in “Mr. Yin Presents...” I was like omg you son of a bitch go save Jules. Jules likes you. You know you love Jules. And he doesn’t. He save Abigail. And I was sad.

Then Abigail breaks up with him and I’m like hah!

And Jules and him get together. I actually had to spoil that for myself to keep going, cuz I almost stopped watching it. The tension was too much. That’s one where if they didn’t end up together, I think it would have ruined the show for me, as crazy as that sounds. I absolutely love the other themes in that show, but I really, REALLY loved Shawn and Jules.

So when they break up for a bit later on, I actually got depressed. Had to spoil AGAIN to keep it moving.

But I can guarantee one thing: If they didn’t end up together, I would not have gone online and started fighting people about it. I would have either stopped watching the series or I would have just suffered through it, depending on how tense it was.

I can tell you, when they finally kissed, I lost my shit. The tension was relieved. To get this shot, I had to watch it again AND GOT ALL WARM AND FUZZY.

And I can tell you right now, if this happens with Cloud and Tifa... I’m not sure what will happen to me. Cuz I reacted ridiculously with this, and right now I’d say I’m more invested in Cloud and Tifa.

It’s just the release of the romantic/sexual tension that I need, I guess.

So the actual actors above were together IRL too. And I was like all about that. They were adorable. Then... she married another guy. I was like wtf guys, come on.

I definitely made sure not to let that ruin the show, since their characters were still together.

But in any case, you can love whatever ships and theories you want. You really shouldn’t go around lying about the story, removing parts of the story, twisting translations, words, everything that’s right in your face.

That’s where I get annoyed. I love all the characters (except Hojo, but he is there to be hated) - so seeing this discourse is sad.

I do laugh my ass off now more than I did before - especially over on Twitter.

#shipping wars #vincent x lucrecia #ff7 spoilers #ff7 doc #dirge of cerberus #psych #shawn x jules #ff8 mention #zell x selphie #seifer x quistis #cloud x tifa #cloti #super random ramblings #fanon is fine #my fanon wasn't canon #vincent is not sephiroth's father as much as i want him to be

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lairofsentinel · 5 years

Text

I've done a long set of three posts about Viren, to understand his char because it's fascinating. The links to a deep analysis are at the end of the post.

Here I will only write the main conclusions as a summary:

If there is something to say in short about him is that... he was not evil at all [I’m not sure by the end of season 3]. He was not thirsty for power during the flashbacks. He always defended Humanity at all cost, using any means at his disposal, and plotting around Harrow to have a better influence on him to suggest him when and how to kill Dragons.

He decided not to ignore the starvation that his own kingdom and Duren were going to suffer, and he came up with a “creative solution”.

He faced Avizandum trying to save the Duren’s Queens [they are precious people, not replaceable soldiers]

He knew Sarai used to see Xadians as creatures with sentiments and families, which was a danger to humanity, since Viren knows Dragons have no mercy towards humanity. So he may have plotted her death, or simply took the opportunity when it was presented. [Update below on this matter]

He manipulated Harrow [one of the many times] to craft the weapon of Vengeance and kill Avizandum, erasing one danger to Humanity.

He called the Pentachry and tried to convince other Kingdoms to kill dragons, so humanity could be safe. He followed a path to gather more and more power to accomplish this goal.

He took the throne for Humanity’s sake [we need to remember he is “the only sane man”].

Everything has been done for Humanity's sake [in his perspective].

Viren never saw himself as a true Servant of a Kingdom, but the Saviour of humanity [he sees himself as someone too precious for Humanity itself!]. He follows the trope of the "Only Sane Man" too [that's why he thinks of himself too special], he is the only one knowing how truly important is to destroy Dragons to let humanity flourish.

He sees soldiers as replaceable pieces, more means to his “noble” ends, and has no scrupulous to manipulate anyone in the smartest way--the King, his children, and even several other Kingdoms's rulers--to save humanity of what he sees as an imminent threat.

However, we saw him that he loved Harrow as a brother so much, that he would have accepted death to save him, putting aside all that obsession about Humanity's safety. I believe Harrow kept Viren more human and less affected by the "hollowing" effect of the Dark Magic than he wants to admit. Once Harrow is dead [specially after the argument with the concept of being a lesser being= servant, that has strong reminiscence with Ziard and Sol Regem], Viren starts a lonely path of "becoming the saviour" of Humanity. And Aaravos takes the place of adviser, doing with Viren, what Viren did all his life with Harrow.

Viren is the "Aaravos" of Harrow.

Viren and Aaravos are two masterminds, having their own particular agendas at the shadows of the one they are influencing. They consider themselves wiser than anyone, and have no problem in using all means to get their goals. They are the same in different levels with different experiences. But I think that Viren's punishment for his manipulations over Harrow is having met Aaravos. If he loses Aaravos' guidance in season 4, I wonder if Viren will recover his senses and realises that he had been doing things against humanity and regrets them. I believe he has good chances to have a half-redeeming arc once he loses the suffocating presence of Aaravos around him. Maybe he returns to his old self, focusing in “saving humanity”, but now, not from Dragons but Aaravos. It would not surprise me if Aaravos has an analogous purpose: saving his people from some bigger danger we don’t see.

Viren has a deep hatred toward Dragons that may or may not be fed by the Historical meeting of Ziard and Sol Regen, that showed that Dragons have never offered many choices of humanity to pick. Maybe that discourse encouraged his way of seeing things related to Dragons as “there is no other way than killing them”. Viren and Ziard may have a blood relationship since both have the same staff. It’s fair to suppose Ziard as an ancestor of Viren.

By the end of Season 3, Viren has been manipulated by Aaravos to such a degree that he is manifesting a lot of symptoms that Humanity's safety is not his main goal anymore, but "Conquering Xadia" [something that may suggest it's Aaravos' true goal]. Viren even turns into "magical creatures"="monsters" his precious humanity, showing how much of his main goals have been corrupted by the presence of Aaravos in his life. However, it's also true that this symbol can be interpreted as Viren seeing soldiers as expendable, as he always saw them, so he doesn’t mind to destroy their humanity to save a “bigger humanity”. But I prefer to think that this symbol shows how much he lost his original goal under the influence of Aaravos. Now he is looking for power to conquer Xadia / destroy the ones who imprisoned Aaravos / and free Aaravos from that dimension he is trapped.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Viren full analysis [part one] [part two] [part three]

-------------------------------------------------------

UPDATE: Since some people told me that the authors claimed that there is no more info about Sarai’s in the following Seasons [I’m believing in their words despite not seeing proof of this, sadly], everyone assumes that she simply died by a lighting and Viren has nothing to do with that death.

Exactly because my whole hypothesis and the reason behind these posts is to show that “maybe” we should be careful about those fragments of the past, is because it’s Viren himself who is narrating them. There is not much information about him and about Sarai’s relationship with him at all. Omission some times is a way to manipulate and twist a narration, the whole series is about that.

As a person who watched the show, to me, Sarai’s death is at least questionable. We don’t have more witnesses than Viren, and we know that Viren, like Aaravos, can be unreliable narrators, making us be more judgemental on certain creatures than what we should. It’s a question. I’m not assuming things happened that way [maybe in the summary sounds more rotund than in the post with details, but meh]. Again, this is what I understood, that sadly, not always ends up what the authors wanted to [The example of Isabela in Dragon Age 2 being understood as barren was a big misunderstanding that, no matter how you see that scene, it looks like that despite the writer told us already that it was not the intention. But the scene looks like that! XD]

So, after reading some people who were between angry and sad about this matter, I believe there are two possibilities:

**He killed her. Viren did not like Sarai as Harrow’s advice, because she may put in danger humanity [we saw he was present when she talked to Harrow about she disagreeing with this plan and Harrow being a stupid]. Although there was not exactly a precise plot against her, Viren, as the opportunist he is, took the chance in the moment he saw it. As soon as he saw the possibility of getting rid of her, he did it, using her last breath as an ingredient for a spell he knew already could be used to kill the Dragon King as soon as he could find a unicorn horn. He awaited the horn, while letting the hatred in Harrow grow. This is why Viren wants to sacrifice himself during the night of the Moonshadow attack, in order to “clean” his sin with Sarai [he did not do all what he could, because his intention was other, and he saw it only escalated things], because he explicitly says that “he needs to be the man that Harrow once believed he was”. This is an interpretation.

** He did not kill her. Viren in fact is kinder and has a more beautiful soul than we want to believe. He saw Sarai dying and he could not do anything about it, he felt deeply guilty, so he took her last breath without knowing what to do with that [I always saw these dark mages gathering Xadians limbs and Xadians bodies, not human ones, but ok, he took her last breath having no idea at all what could he do with a human last breath]. However, years later, out of guilt, decided to avenge her and, by super chance, he had all the elements to do so when Claudia found him the horn. He insisted too much to Harrow about taking revenge. So, in the end, he avenges Sarai’s death and he is in peace with that, until the night of the Moonshadow attack. It’s when he decided to acknowledge his mistake of looking for revenge [or guilt for Sarai, for not doing enough when she was dying] so he tries to save Harrow by convincing him to exchange their bodies. In this interpretation Viren is shown too selfless and too focused on Sarai’s life/vengeance, to a level I didn’t see in him in any other part of the series, except in those in which he controls the narration. All the info about his relationship with Sarai was omitted or doesn’t exist at all. We have no idea, so why would he focus so much on her revenge if he sees Harrow happy with his current blessings?.

That’s why I wrote all this... to try to have all the info and the important scenes in a same place highlighting who is saying what. This Series works, apparently, with unreliable narrators, so it’s more than important to know who says what. But again, this is just for personal use and it’s my own interpretation. Everyone is free to disagree.

#viren #the dragon prince #The dragon prince lore #character analysis #no no I dont defend or support Viren's ways #but I love mastermind characters

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vecna · 5 years

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Oohh for the fandom meme! Dragon Age?

Send me a fandom!

Oh boy, this is going to be spicy.

It’s also very Anders-negative, so apologies up front.

The character(s) I first fell in love with:

I’m actually not sure which was the FIRST, but it’s a tie between Morrigan and Alistair. I saw fanart of them going around at the time Origins first released, and that’s what got me to try the game!

Alistair was a breath of fresh air, because at the time, I was used to warrior men in games being all Edgy and Rough, and he was the total opposite and a sweetheart.

And Morrigan was just instantly my goth wife, and had Claudia Black as a VA, so I was sold immediately.

Both still hold a special place for me!

The character(s) I never expected to love as much as I do now:

Loghain is the main one. He does a lot of truly reprehensible shit in the first game. But once I sat down and read the prequel novels about young Loghain, plus saw what he’s like if you recruit him, he grew on me A LOT and now he’s a top fave.

Nathaniel I expected to hate as soon as I saw his name + who his father was, but then the expansion came out and I ended up loving that dude almost immediately. I really wish he was around more after Awakening, and also really wish he’d been a romance option, especially for a Cousland haha.

Merrill is a weird one because she was totally uninteresting to me in DA:O, so when they announced her as a companion in DA2 I was like, “Ehhhh.” Then they punked me by making her adorable and sweet and now I love her.

Plus a bunch of side-characters like The Architect? I liked him a bunch in the novel + Awakening – although I found his Plan in the novel much more appealing. But as the years have gone by, I keep surprising myself at just HOW disappointed I am he’s never appeared again haha.

The character(s) everyone else loves that I don’t:

There’s a few, and all of them will get me yelled at, but here we go.

First: Isabela. This one’s a bit complicated, but it really just boils down to her attitude towards how you play your character. I actively dislike characters who are super sexual – regardless of gender. But Isabela in particular bothers me because she’s constantly pushing her lewdness and sexual humor on you, and when you try to discourage it, she admonishes you with, “Well, you’re no fun.” Her whole character is just… like that for me. Super pushy, overly lewd, gets uppity when you don’t have the same ~liberated~ opinions she does, and this is all played up in the writing like she’s this Empowered Woman the player absolutely must love, especially if they’re playing a male character lol. I hate her for the same reasons a lot of people hate Liara in Mass Effect, but with the addition of pushy lewd jokey characters always rubbing me the wrong way.

Second: Iron Bull. I’ve written a lot about why he makes me more uncomfortable than any fictional character I’ve ever encountered, and I just outright hate him, he makes my skin crawl. If you want details, feel free to DM me, I don’t really want to rant about it again publicly.

Third: Anders. Again, I’ve written a lot about him before, but. I hated him in Awakening, for a lot of the same reasons I hate Isabela in DA2. But the changes they made to him in DA2 are just kinda :/. While I absolutely agree with him about Mage Rights, the level of preachiness they added to him drove me nuts, and the fact that you’re painted as a Bad Guy if you don’t like him blowing up the chantry. And from a purely OOC standpoint: He’s become a figurehead for all the aggressive Discourse people in the fandom, and if I see someone list Anders in their sidebar bio, I know pre-emptively that their blog is going to be full of 6 page long essays of meta about how everything is Problematic, and no thanks.

To a lesser extent, I’m also not fond of Zevran. But in his case, it’s not anything major like the others, I’m just tired of Bioware’s habit of making the bisexual characters overly lewd sex-focused rogues/deviants.

The character(s) I love that everyone else hates:

Loghain, lol.

But also Sebastian Vael? There’s so much about him that I find genuinely fascinating, especially regarding his backstory, and his struggles between his feelings of responsibility to his family vs his dedication to the Chantry and bettering himself. He’s such a dear character to me, and such a pivotal part of any playthrough, I’m always blown away when I remember he’s a DLC character and many people don’t have him.

HOWEVER Anders being the fandom darling means that people tend to unfairly shit on Sebastian for reacting poorly to the Chantry explosion. People also like to label him as a poster child of a White Straight Church Boy, while refusing to acknowledge he’s… not straight, and not exactly a church boy either lol.

Also Vivienne, but I think that one’s really self-explanatory. I love her, and she gives a really needed perspective on the Circle, since most of the mage companions previously were apostates. But of course, she gets written off as a Chantry apologist, and an uppity bitch, when people would def love her for the same traits if she was not black lol.

The character(s) I used to love but don’t any longer:

Justice. And by extension, Anders. A lot of people like to rant about how Justice ruined Anders, but I always saw it the other way around.Justice was my favorite character in Awakening. The whole concept around him, that he was a Fade spirit who took human form and was experiencing life for the first time was SO fascinating. I felt like there was so much to explore there with his character.

Buuuut then they had him merge with Anders. With the narrative being that he WAS a spirit of Justice, but the moment he connected with Anders, it corrupted his entire spirit into something he wasn’t anymore. So essentially, the character I used to love no longer exists, thanks to Anders. And it reminds me of that phrase recently, about how the destination is so terrible you can no longer enjoy the journey? I can’t even appreciate Justice in Awakening anymore, knowing what happens to him.

To a lesser extent, Corypheus. He was SO COOL and the premise of him was AMAZING when he first appeared in the DA2 DLC, but then Inquisition had to go and turn him into a weird shallow mustache twirl villain.

The character(s) I would totally smooch:

None? Idk I don’t really have the Smooch Fictional Character gene.

The character(s) I’d want to be like:

MAEVARIS TILANI. May I one day finally have the confidence in my identity that she does, and also marry a sweet bear man who adores me.

The character(s) I’d slap:

Too many to list, really. Probably Anders.

The pairing(s) that I love:

THERE’S SO MANY. And most of them are with the PC, because I generally don’t ship NPCs together. But my top 3 are:

M!Hawke / Fenris is my ultimate OTP in the Dragon Age series, by a long-shot. Not even sure where to start on how much I love it, but two damaged guys leaning on each other to work through their respective loneliness and trauma is MY JAM. And lmao I love silver-sideburned Hawke chillin in retirement somewhere but being a supportive husband while Fenris goes off hunting the Bad Guys, it’s great.

Solas / Lavellan is a close second, with the caveat that I increasingly prefer it with a male Lavellan. Having the Inquisitor in love with Solas just changes the entire tone of the game for me, for the better, and him actually being the villain trying to end the world while in love with this normie elf is just (chef kiss). Too bad I’m burned out by how overly spammed it is.

Dorian / Inquisitor is in third, I will just always be fond of how it’s a story of the Inquisitor helping Dorian be happy with who he is, escape an abusive family, and realize that he’s allowed to be loved. Good shit good shit.

Some others:

Warden / Morrigan is probably my favorite Origins ship, and that only intensified with the way she talks about the Warden in Inquisition, esp if they’re Kieran’s other parent. What a cute goth family, regardless of the Warden’s gender, cause you can pry Bi Morrigan from my cold dead fingers.

Cassandra / Inquisitor might have a lot of Romance Cliches, but I adore it – although, similar others, I increasingly prefer it with a female Inquisitor. I actively dislike the weird no-homo rejection with her, and come on, a lady Inquisitor being her Knight In Shining Armor is just good storytelling.

Cullen / Inquisitor, for a lot of the same reasons as Cassandra. I love me a cliche romance, but I’m also fond of the narrative w/ him of someone he loves helping him heal through the lyrium withdrawals and take time to rest.

Josephine / F!Inquisitor is just adorable all around, and wholesome, and great.

Varric / Hawke COME ON HOW WAS THIS NOT AN OPTION.

On the rarepair end:

Sebastian / Hawke doesn’t seem like it would be a rarepair – you’d think everyone who loves Cullen/Inquisitor would love this one too. I do! But alas. That said, I’m also pretty aggro about this one with a male Hawke because SEBASTIAN IS CANON BI. WHY WAS HIS ROMANCE STRAIGHT.

Maric / Loghain is a rarepair I will take with me to my grave LOL. Never forget the scene where Maric thought Loghain was leaving, and bolted across the camp with almost no clothes on to beg Loghain to stay. Come on.

Nathaniel / Cousland is dear to me, and I love it so much more than Alistair / Cousland haha.

Greagoir / Wynne, I can’t believe this got validated in canon ahhhh.

The pairing(s) that I despise:

Again: THERE’S SO MANY.

Iron Bull / Dorian is my least fave by a longshot. Again, I have written about why I hate this pairing a great many times, but it’s awful and toxic and makes me deeply uncomfortable, and I could happily go the rest of my life without seeing anything about it ever again. Please keep poor Dorian away from that man. He deserves someone that doesn’t sexually harass him until he’s finally worn down into dubious consent (while drunk) and then outted to everyone about it.

Isabela / Fenris. Sorry, but it’s just bad writing that Fenris bails on Hawke because the physical intimacy triggered his PTSD and he needs space to process, but then will turn around and have a casual sex relationship with Isabela instead. Yikes.

Anders / Fenris. Aveline / Isabela. Alistair / Morrigan. All of the DA2 Hawke/companion rivalmances. I don’t enjoy “these two people hate and antagonize and want to kill each other… but they fuck” in any form.

Cullen / Amell. Yikes.

And basically ALL of the canon wlw pairings in this series suffer from the fact they have men writing them, and as a result they’re almost always some kind of abusive or racist, and skeeve me out. See: Celene / Briala, Leliana / Marjolaine, Branka / Hespith, etc. Please Bioware, I’m begging you to consult some actual queer women. It’s insane how badly they’re treated compared to how the canon mlm couples are written.

FINALLY, I recognize this will be the most unpopular of all, but. As much as I love M!Hawke/Fenris, I just honestly cannot stand seeing F!Hawke/Fenris. There are some pairings where I’m so attached to the m/m or f/f version, I cannot deal with the m/f version anymore, and that’s one of them. (The others are mainly non-Bioware.)

#LONG POST #REALLY LONG #SORRY #misc: text #misc: asks #misc: meme #series: dragon age #gen: bioware #utopianoverlord

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spiders-hth-is-an-outlier · 5 years

Text

Ey, so, what happened is that I posted a Schitt's Creek fic late last night and went to bed. Then I overslept and went to work and then went straight to some family stuff after work, so by the time I checked up later this afternoon, there were not only comments, but also Discourse in the Comments – enough Discourse in the Comments that I decided that in addition to staying up late tonight to answer individual comments (which is a great problem to have! Fuck sleep, moar comments!), I should probably Address the Discourse in one go so I wouldn't have to repeat myself quite so much.

This is, arguably, a big mistake, since at the end of the day, people feel however they feel about the story, and they're certainly entitled to their feelings. For the most part, my chosen medium for self-expression is fiction, and I figure that if I failed to express myself adequately in the fiction, too bad for me. But what the hell, it's Pride and I like to hear myself talk, so if there is anyone who has questions or weird feelings about the choices I made in this story, I'm making this bit of my Writing Process transparent for you, so you at least know why I did what I did.

The gist, for onlookers, is that there's a moment deep in the middle of this David/Patrick story where Patrick says David is bisexual and David goes along with that, which rang false to some people because elsewhere in canon, David's father describes him as pansexual instead, and we generally assume – and I also assume! – that he does so because that's the label David prefers.

I feel like the easiest first layer of this to peel off is that, yes, Patrick is wrong. Patrick – a deeply closeted small-town boy with few or no close ties to The Community – hears his friend and co-worker talking about relationships with men and women, and he thinks to himself, “Oh, okay, he's bisexual, then,” because to most of the world, that's what bisexual means. I think he would have no reason to second-guess himself on that, or wonder if there's another term that David prefers. Patrick literally doesn't know enough about this issue to know that he might be wrong about it. What Patrick thinks he understands, he doesn't fully understand, and that's intentional, because the whole story is about Patrick being in this “messy middle part,” where he kind of doesn't know the rules and doesn't get things right.

That, I think, came across clearly to most readers, but there was still this question of, well, couldn't I have written David correcting this mistake, at that moment or somewhere else in the story, so that the reader would understand that I know Patrick is wrong and that I, personally, am not condoning the general practice of disregarding people's chosen labels.

And of course I could have. I didn't for two reasons, one of characterization and one of theme – but that's not an objectively correct choice, it's just the choice I made in service of this particular story. A different writer could have gone a different route and written a different story, and maybe that would've worked just as well! But it wouldn't have been a good call for this story.

First, just as a basic point of characterization, it's my take that David Rose actually doesn't feel strongly enough to object. We don't ever see him identify as anything – we see him talking freely about past experiences, but the one and only time he's called on to explain what he is to someone else, it's the scene while shopping with Stevie where (albeit through the lens of what I still feel is a somewhat labored metaphor), he gives a version of Ye Olde “I don't like labels” speech. To me, David is a pretty recognizable type: he thinks of himself as liking lots of stuff and free to do what he likes without being boxed in by other people's opinions, and he's carried forward with the exact same attitude he deployed when he came out to his parents: “I'm doing this, deal with it.” So even though I was aware, and I knew the reader would be aware, that Patrick was wrong, my thought on what seemed natural to David as a character was that I didn't really see him caring about the issue enough to derail what was actually going on in that conversation. That's my read on the character, and it may not match yours; that's fine, it doesn't have to.

However, characters aren't real and don't make decisions; writers do. It would be absurd for me to say, “Well, this is out of my hands, obviously it would happen this way, because Characterization.” I could have structured the whole scene differently, and I didn't. Instead, I wrote a scene where, arguably, a personal of marginalized identity is mis-labeled and doesn't seem to mind that much, and I think one fair response to that scene is to say, Maybe don't volunteer to write scenes that work out that way, when instead you could write in such a way as to demonstrate that you're on the side of not mis-labeling people of marginalized identities.

I did volunteer to write that scene, because I do think this story required that scene. When David says, “It's okay if you are, too” – even though he knows full well that it's not true – what he's actually saying is, “If what you need right now is a label for yourself that's factually wrong, I'm giving you permission to use it.” David is not bisexual and neither is Patrick. This is a scene where David explicitly gives Patrick an exit route if he needs one, where David is actively prioritizing being protective and comforting with Patrick over requiring Patrick to tell the truth. It's an act of generosity on his part, and it's an act of bravery on Patrick's part to refuse it. It's a brief exchange, but it's absolutely central to the moment Patrick is at, where he can't say true things yet but won't say false ones anymore, and the moment completely relies on the reader understanding that this word they're talking about – “bisexual” – is a dishonest word in this context. They're discussing whether or not it's okay to be dishonest, and David's take is “sure, if you need that, then do it” while Patrick's is “that would be going backwards and I'm not letting myself down like that.” David and the reader know that it's a dishonest word in both cases, while Patrick only recognizes that about himself, because again, there's a lot that Patrick doesn't know yet. He's just now learning.

I write a lot of scenes that are “two people in a room talking,” and if done badly, those can be excruciatingly dull. I don't like dull; I like writing things that feel taut and have forward motion and tension, because I think that's what makes a scene memorable. So every time I sit down to write yet another “these two dudes are going to be in a room talking for a while” scene, there are questions I ask myself about what's happening here and why it should happen, because otherwise I'm violating the first and only law of fiction, which is Don't Waste Your Reader's Fucking Time.

The first question is: what's the premise here? What's the situation that confronts these characters, that they're going to be responding or reacting to? And the other question is: how are they going to respond and react to that situation in two productively different ways – ways that are in conflict or incompatible or in competition? If I know what's going on, and I know how these two people are seeing it differently and making different arguments about what should happen next, there's a natural tension of competing agendas that wants to resolve itself at the end, or carry over to the next scene.

In “1001,” my premise is: Patrick is undergoing a process of transformation with regard to his sexual identity that takes time and doesn't really proceed linearly and logically. That's what's happening. The way he's responding to that is, he's frustrated and embarrassed, because he feels like he's failing to master this situation, like it's getting the better of him no matter how he tries to set rules for it. The way David is responding to the premise is, he's trying to curb and mitigate these ways that Patrick is judging himself harshly, trying to get Patrick to accept that the middle is just messy and things will be a mess until they aren't anymore. Patrick is facing a challenge, and they're ultimately in an argument about whether or not Patrick is failing it.

That's why I wanted Patrick to be wrong about certain things – I wanted him to authentically be kind of messy, which shows up in little ways from how he can't get the till counted and he can't say gay and he can't put his finger on the song he's thinking of, and not yet speaking the insider-language fluently is part of that. But more importantly, that's why David's reaction couldn't really involve correcting Patrick's use of the insider-language, because the whole meaning of the story is that David is actively refusing to agree that what's going on with Patrick right now is a problem that needs correcting.

A startling number of writing issues are actually philosophical issues, and this is probably one of them. Like I said, fiction is my main medium for telling people what I think about the world, and the role that I have David playing in this story, as the older, more experienced queer person, is what it is because I have been the older, more experienced queer person trying to figure out how to help someone who's brand new to everything – and what I've come to believe through these experiences is that while there is a time and a place for educators, for being the person who says “actually, that's not quite right, we say or do this instead of that,” the on-the-ground reality is that if people are still in a state of extreme vulnerability and self-doubt, they have a far, far greater need for people who will affirm them rather than instruct them.

Someone in Patrick's place, who is stuck between an old belief and a new self, who feels like they're failing and floundering, who thinks it's easy for other people and hard for them because they're messier or more broken or more cowardly than everyone else, deserves to be received with compassion and told that messy is fine, not knowing is fine, this process is normal and they are fine. The story I wanted to write was about David giving that grace and spaciousness to Patrick, and it ended with Patrick accepting it at least enough to say “this will just take care of itself if I give it enough time” about the song thing, which stands in a bit for his problem-solving approach to the whole situation (because then we know as readers that when he finds the “best song” he's unlocked the whole thing, and we know that's coming, just like David told him the end would come). It's my opinion that having David double back, at any point in the story, and say “actually, that's not quite right, you should have said this instead” would have fatally undermined everything about the alternative argument David is presenting about the nature of Patrick's situation. Patrick is the one who worries about getting this right; David is the one who wants him to be okay with being wrong for now.

And like most writers, when I set up those dueling arguments, I am actually coming down on one side or the other by the end: David's side. I didn't have David correcting him because I think David wouldn't correct him, but even more than that because I think the nature and structure of this story makes it ethically right for David to hold back from correcting him. I think he's the one being the hero here, by accepting Patrick's messiness and imperfection and just taking the approach of, yeah, it's all new, it's tough going, but even though you don't feel fine right now, you are fundamentally fine.

You as a reader don't have to accept that moral argument. You can think it would have made David a better person to model a commitment to truth, to set a higher standard and ask Patrick to live up to it. That's okay! It's totally fine to be like, “I see that this writer wants me to feel one way about this, but actually I just don't, I think that's dead wrong.” Other writers are going to tackle stories about what it feels like to be part of Patrick's coming-out story, both in his role and in David's role, and those writers can and should make their own best arguments, in stories that are built to be about whatever they want to say about coming out. Those stories will just be different from mine, which is great, that's what having a voice as a writer means – that you're thoughtfully constructing stories in ways that express how you see the world, not how anybody else does it.

And if you read “1001” and you cared enough about it to have an opinion, I genuinely appreciate your time and the thought you put into it. Thank you.

#hth fic

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kimberlycook95 · 4 years

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Can Baby Save Marriage Top Tips

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#Can Baby Save Marriage Top Tips #Save Virginity For Marriage

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randomnessunicorn-imagine · 7 years

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hOI!!! May you please do "I'LL PROTECT YOU! I'M BATMAN!" with UF Sans from the meme prompt? Thanks!!😘

— Post Scriptum: This prompt is so old but I had no time and inspiration for thinking about fanfictions before, so I am doing it now. Even now, the reader has a name that is neutral, since I prefer like this, their name is Alex, simple. It’s totally random-!I hope someone can enjoy it since I am not truly sure if it’s good enough eue’’

Prompt: “I’ll protect you! I am Batman!” ( From this list )Pairing: Fell! Sans x Neutral! ReaderRating: Green (General contents)

A Drunky Mess ~

It should have been a calm and relaxing afternoon and Alex should have spent this day in peace. Sadly, a certain skeleton has decided to get drunk just today. Actually, Sans had promised to Alex that this was the last bottle he touched but it was not true. There were so many bottles he had not only touched, it was like he was doing love with them since he was hitting to the bottle like Gollum was attached to his precious, so it was not a beautiful picture since it appeared very creepy and Sans was still a skeleton. The sense of macabre was part of his nature. Alex did not know the reason why he was drinking since when they came back home, he was already in those miserable conditions and Alex was looking at him with pity.Actually, those last days Alex was very busy with their job so they stayed by themselves most of the time and Sans could not tolerate to be ignored like this so he felt a little offended like he was the child who felt less loved by his mother. He was losing time and he hated working so much, it was a waste of energy and time for him. Sans said he did not want to be part of this capitalist society to justify his laziness. He felt just like the protagonist of the famous movie Fight Club, the man without a name who lived his life without any purpose and his main passion was reading Ikea’s magazines searching for the perfect furnishings that would have given to him the peace of mind. It was impossible anyway, and even this drunk Sans was telling free nonsense without a purpose. At least, he did not start to frequent clubs of terminally ill patients who got testicular cancer, and it would have been so problematic. Maybe Sans would have been a member of the A.A. if he kept on drinking like this. Alex tried so hard to dissuade him asking for an explication about his obscene behaviour, then Sans looked at them with a sad expression confessing the truth. Alex was avoiding him because they did not want to stay with him anymore for some mysterious reasons. The eyes of Alex became wetter and they felt a warm feeling in their heart since he seemed so serious in his drunkenness and everybody knew drunk people never lied. They hugged him instantly, patting their skull since this was a scene too adorable to be denied. «I was just busy with my job, you know? It’s the thing people do for living and pay their bills and all that capitalist stuff…», Alex said ironically, laughing a little, «That thing you should do but you are a lazy ass…», they tried to be playful even if this phrase was a hidden critique. It seemed, this explication did not help Sans to stay better because he felt tired and lost anyway, «Ouch—Ya’re gonna to become a maniac worker like my bro, fuu–», he said with confusion in his voice and then he started to sob searching for the bottle that was his only friend and his only hope in this moment. Alex was losing their patience since he acted like a little child and maybe they had to behave like Papyrus to have some consideration from this impertinent skeleton. «So, do you want I ask to Papyrus to kick your ass or you decide to be less lazy and act like a mature person, hum? ». It seemed “Papyrus” was like the magical word because Sans’ sockets became black and he started to panic, sweating like he already went out of a sauna but the sense of looseness was not the same. Sans could not even speak and he felt pain in his ass yet so maybe it was the time he could stop with this awful show. Alex felt a little sad because it seemed Sans listened only to his brother ignoring them like they were not truly important. So many times, they have told to him to stop with those bad habits but he has never considered their opinion like it was not worthy. Only now, Alex realized it, and this consideration filled their heart with rage and gloom. Their expression became darker, and with a low tone of voice they said, «Ah, I am not going to call your brother, I don’t want to disturb him.» Sans seemed more relieved after this conclusion. Before he could answer, Alex continued their discourse, «Since you are unable to be serious and you don’t give a shit about me and my worries, I think I will go. Cheers to you-!». Then, Alex took their things moving towards the door because maybe Sans was not the only one who needed to drink.

Even if he was drunk, he could understand Alex was mad at him and they had all the reasons to consider him like a total insensitive bastard. Before they could leave, he started screaming that he did not mean it and he cared a lot about them. Sans was just a freak, so Alex was free to leave him since they had kept persevering to him even if he did not deserve anything. Then, his voice became harsher and the act of speaking seemed so difficult to Sans since his words turned into sighs and he exploded in tears like a little baby. Since he was still drunk, Alex doubted he could remember this conversation since it seemed he was suffering so much and maybe the alcohol was not helping him to dissimulate this stress. Exhaling a deep breath, Alex turned around saying they were sorry but they felt truly sad for his childish behaviour, «Ah, ok… We both crossed the line, and maybe you should stop to drink and I should stop to overwork myself… Ok?». Alex got closer to Sans showing a little smile, maybe it was all useless since he was going to forget everything when he became sober, but Alex wanted to try anyway. Sans looked at them like a frustrated dog, «Uhm… You are not going to leave me…?», that was not suppose to be a question because he wanted them to say the same phrase, but he was still unsure. Then, Alex embraced him kissing his bone cheek and his crying get intensified since his emotions were so much and he could not understand his mind anymore. «I am not going to leave you but stop to cry, you are such a crybaby. Where is the badass skeleton I know?», Sans sniffed in a way that was not that badass and Alex laughed. He grunted full of embarrassment because he had to be strong and cool for them, without acting like a spoiled baby. Sans, trying to act chillier than ever, stood up on his feet staggering like a monkey, then he took the bottle and Alex started to worry he was still too drunk. He raised the bottle up, screaming between his sobs, «Yeah, you’re right. I decide, I stop with this shit–», he looked the bottle with the most hostile glare he could ever do even if it appeared funny because he did not appear scary, at all. Then, he continued saying, «You know, you said I don’t have a job, but I actually have and it’s very cool.» he was raving again and Alex looked at him with curiosity, asking, «Oh, really? And which one?» they raised an eyebrow, dubious. «I’m a fucking hero babe, and if I’m drunk I can’t protect you… Yeah!», it seemed he had a revelation, « I’LL PROTECT YOU! I’M BATMAN!». Alex face palmed themselves but it was better if they would have seen the next scene because Sans’ drunkenness was still exponential. He hit his skull with the same bottle, like it was a normal thing, then he started laughing like a mad man saying he was fine and it was the final demonstration of his coolness because he was still strong and worthy to be their mate. Yes, it was crazy but Alex was happy seeing the usual jerk they loved so much. Maybe Alex had to be the one to protect him especially in these weird situations where Sans lost his rationality becoming a freak of nonsense.

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janiedean · 7 years

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marrecarandgi ha risposto al tuo post

“marrecarandgi ha risposto al tuo post “remember when oscar isaac was...”

What are you arguing here? That Finn doesn't face racism or faces less than Poe? It's simply not true. In this fandom and in all others. If you don't believe me, you have Google at your disposal, I can't fit the countless examples here anyway. So, when POC notice racist and specifically anti black tendencies, that a whitepassing (only "Europeans", who "don't see race" claim that Poe is "white for them, not actual critics) character is treated better than a black coc, you probably should try to listen to them instead of playing the victim of the fandom not being nice enough space. Because, honestly, if I had time or desire, I could've explained to you how each and every one of your point is bs.

... have you even read what I wrote? oh good lord I don’t have the patience any more

let’s go over it again

I’m saying people talk about finn less than ****kylo ren**** because people are generally more interested in the antagonist rather than the good side heroes when it comes to star wars. vader is more popular than just about everyone and the dark side generally gets more attention. idg it because I personally don’t care for the dark side but it’s not **racism** per se, it’s how fandom goes. every time. people care more about loki than thor because loki is the kind of tormented antagonist that interests people and thor is the good guy who doesn’t as much, not because loki has black hair and thor is blonde and no one likes blondes.

I’m also saying that people talk less about poe because he has relatively little screentime in comparison to finn and rey. he was in there for twenty minutes total maybe thirty if we stretch it.

I’m not saying finn doesn’t face racism especially from people who are in fandom but don’t write fanfic or do fanart or whatever and I especially mean those assholes who said you couldn’t have a black lead in SW, I’m saying that when it comes to fandom’s treatment of finn vs kylo or vs poe or vs whoever else a lot of the things that people deem problematic are common to every other fandom in existence and to the type of character finn is. the things I hate most about fanon finn’s characterization are the same things I hate about fanon bucky characterizations, and what do they have in common? they’re two people who come from being employed against their will by the villain side of the story who are actually good people and don’t want to fight for that side and who have gone through types of brainwashing to a different degree (finn because he was brought up to be a stormtrooper without identity and bucky because they literally erased it form him) from people who saw them as weapons and not people. it’s a trope. in a lot of fic where they’re in it, they’re characterized as if they need someone to hold their hand every other moment, which I frankly dislike a lot, and it’s the same for a lot of characters coming from that context. in some cases it can be racism, in others it’s just that finn is that type of character and he’s black, but I’ve been in fandom since 2003 and I saw that way of writing abused characters back then. address that if you think it’s an address-able problem, but it happening to finn has more to do with his background than his skin color. then if you’re talking about other things idk because as stated I stopped engaging other than checking the ao3 finnp0e tag after I read that if you shipped it you were objectifying nonwhite people because I ship people for their relationship, but that was the state of the discourse when I noped out.

‘only "Europeans", who "don't see race" claim that Poe is "white for them, not actual critics’ > er, actually most latin-americans I know would argue that poe is *not* a POC and that they don’t even abide to that definition and that people across latin america come in all shades so making the white/poc distinction makes no sense because they don’t think of themselves as such. but okay.

also: idk if you wanna be edgy by putting “don’t see race” in brackets, but I’m gonna tell you a thing: us europeans who *don’t see race* have studied WWII in school for a long time. I studied WWII since I was nine. now, you know what’s the basics of nazi race theory? that races exist and some races are more worthy than others and that you can count how much of a race you are by tracing back your grandparents, so idk if you have one black grandparent and three white ones you’re still considered *impure* same as if you have a jewish grandparent and so on. the drop of blood rule to us sounds like nazi theory 101 and honestly that’s why to a lot of us Europeans just the fact that here on tumblr ‘race’ is used as an actual thing that exist is skin-crawling worthy. what I learned in school is that the human race is just one and then you have different ethnicities within it but that at the bottom if it we’re the same, because if you admit that then saying you’re inherently better than a black person because you’re *different* or another race entirely isn’t that easy anymore. which doesn’t mean we don’t see ethnicity or culture - I’d never say that a chinese person is the same as a french or a south-african or canadian because I know they have different background and different experiences and different ethnicities, but I would not say they’re a different RACE than I am, because to me it would sound like something out of mein kampf. I can’t conceive the prospect that me and a black person are different RACES. we’re both human. then they’re obviously different ethnicity and culture and I see and recognize it. like, can you all stop twisting it like we think everyone is the same and there’s no difference at all? also, here, the moment someone says black people are an inferior race or a race at all, they get labeled FASCIST RACIST 101 STAY AWAY FROM ME. anyway, I do understand that on tumblr the discourse is american so I just scroll by over the use of the term race, but for me your definition is something I could never use. because cultural relativism. and ‘white passing’ for me is just the proof that poc as a term only works in the US and badly at that because why the fuck you need a term to say that some people who aren’t white look white is beyond me when you could just use their damned ethnicities to call them and be done with it, but never mind.

also idk where you gathered that I said poe was white. I said that according to some people it seems that he’s not when he’s shipped with finn but he is when he’s shipped with rey. and that makes no fucking sense. if oscar is a poc and poe is a poc (according to your definition) then both finnp0e and reyp0e are interracial couples. period. you can’t change the meaning of a word or someone’s ethnicity based on who the fuck you ship him with. and that’s a thing that happens in this fandom. period.

‘you probably should try to listen to them instead of playing the victim of the fandom not being nice enough space’ > man, I don’t think you understood my point. I’m not playing victim. I’m in fandom because I want to have fun and not because I want to run a politics campaign. now, I don’t care for fandom being a nice space, even if like, since it’s escapism, I’d like it if it was about fandom and not US politics cropping up everywhere. the point is that some of us are in fandom for shipping. I like finn and poe together. I wanna write finn and poe together. I want to do it best as I can and admittedly the one time I did it and posted it on tumblr I got more notes than I do for.... four fics for my main fandom combined. I had fun. I wrote them the way I saw them. I made sure to write them as IC as I could. I kinda wanna do it again. but the idea of going into a fandom where there’s discourse at every corner makes me want to shoot myself in the head. if people complain about ky*lux getting more traffic now, it’s because there’s less discourse over there for whichever reason you wanna pinpoint (problematic faves? problematic ship so no one judges others?). are there wankers over there? sure thing, but nowhere near as much as a corner of the fandom where every other day you can’t ship anything because it’s somehow -ist. and some of us want to, like, have fun. and produce content. and we don’t. because it’s not fun. and like, you can make it a welcoming space or not, idc because I’m not in it, but if then your discourse makes people run off to ship kylo and hux then don’t complain that you used to have more traffic when the movie was out and everyone was excited about things and the discourse wasn’t a thing. like. I don’t even engage in fandom exactly because I don’t want discourse, so I’m already doing what you’re telling me to. sometimes I rant about it on my blog.... in...... untagged posts like the one you replied to which I didn’t tag EXACTLY BECAUSE I DIDN’T WANT DISCOURSE, so.

‘Because, honestly, if I had time or desire, I could've explained to you how each and every one of your point is bs.’ > yeah, but you didn’t. (always the same thing I hear. ‘I could tell you why you’re wrong but I won’t’) and honestly, given that I’m not gonna touch this fandom properly with a ten foot pole for the foreseeable future, I also can live without it.

anyway, I was just arguing that tfa fandom is unlivable if you’re not here for the discourse (which is true and it’s one’s prerogative since again fandom is escapism or a hobby unless you’re a youtuber or you made a job out of it), that people can and will ship what they want and they should be able to (and if you think this point is bullshit then we don’t have any more to discuss because the moment you tell me that people shouldn’t ship ANYTHING because it’s not morally fine according to you I’m out), that a person can’t fucking be white and not white at the same time (which is just basic logic) and that accusing people of -isms based just on their shipping preferences is bullshit (because rl and fiction aren’t the same thing and most of us know that, and again if you think this is bs you can spare yourself a reply I’m not even gonna bother because it’s a point I can’t really gloss over and we’d have a basic disagreement). idk what you thought I was saying or when I said poe was white (btw whiteness in europe =/= whiteness in the US) or when I said fandom wasn’t racist towards finn or whatever but feel free to put words into my mouth ad libitum, I’m really done.

(and this is still why I’m not touching this fandom ever)

#marrecarandgi #janie replies #wank for ts #liberatemi da questo fardello #nclpf #va bene va bene va bene in verità #notte e giorno faticar per chi nulla sa gradir

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