#it's vibes-based. i cannot be convinced

[catboy-beckett]

You know what??? I think Pokémon really went off with the category of designs that's just "looking like a human woman in a dress". I know people are horny for some of these designs but I must stress I care a 0 amount about that. It's not my motivation, nor does knowing about it ruin these designs for me. I just like them. Just look at these.

This is peak.

[eleu22]

What Task Force 141’s Houses Would Look Like

John Price

- he lives in a cabin I cannot be convinced otherwise.

- very rustic, defo goes fishing or hunting for fun in his spare time

- likes to be away from the city

- its maximalist in kind of an organised chaos way he can find whatever he need’s immediately but to anyone else it looks kind of insane

- he’d be cleaner if he lived with someone - but yaknow #singledad

- very homey, warm vibes

- if the apocalypse ever hit you’d wanna be here, it’s decked out, secluded, he’s a bit of a doomsday prepper

- has once pissed outside to ‘mark his territory’ but you couldn’t torture that information out of him

- defo has that one room that is mysteriously locked and refuses to elaborate on when asked about it (Gaz secretly thinks it’s really cool) (it probably just has his fishing gear)

Kyle “Gaz” Garrick

- very chic, cool tones

- screams “I did economy as an A-Level but I use pinterest”

- probably has had some type of dinner party with the 141 just to subtly flex to them that “in another life I was an interior designer”

- also defo cooks something with wine just, again to subtly flex his culture capital (he just wants some approval guys bless him)

- plant father - cannot be convinced otherwise

- very organised, keeps it pretty clean unless he’s feeling lazy which isn’t very often

- definitely has a record player - do not mention it or he will go on about how it “just sounds better” (with Price in the background nodding in agreement - but in an old man way)

- somewhere has a box of stuff that doesn’t fit his aesthetic but it’s shit he needs to keep anyways

John “Soap Mactavish

- messy as fuck, no rhyme or reason to it he just puts stuff down, forgets its there and thats just where it lives now COUGH man-child COUGH

- puts some of his drawings up on his walls

- defo has a comic book collection and some action figures

- bunch of childhood shit he refuses to throw away - criminal hoarder

- he likes the messy kind of boyish charm it has, every time his mom comes over she scolds him for it

- a bunch of stuff he’s collected from different places he’s gone, he’ll usually grab some stuff while on deployment if he has any free time, like snow globes or whatever

- went to Greece once and got one of those wooden dicks and finds it so funny, he says it’s the living room’s ‘conversation piece’

- he’s pretty clean when on base aswell, it’s just without the millitary’s structure or someone literally forcing him to clean up he doesn’t really care - it’s his house anyways

Simon “Ghost” Riley

- um

- yikes

- yeah you can tell he doesn’t really like spending time at home on leave

- the singular chair infront of the tv is so sad

- king of minimalism - if that’s what you wanna call it ig

- doesn’t bother decorating or getting anything past the bare essentials because what’s the point?

- doesn’t care it’s a shithole, he can afford a better house, but it kind of reminds him of home back in Manchester (crying)

- definitely chain smokes in his bathroom

- he’s got a treadmill there somewhere

- has a box full of his family’s belongings under his bed (crying again)

- no mirrors, only a small one in the bathroom to shave

- only item of decoration is a snow globe Soap gave him once, it sits next to his bed

[hobgoblinsandpeachfuzz]

here have a musical number as a treat*

*i don't write songs very well forgive the cheesiness

But on the plus side, instead of this being my planned finale I now have a rough outline of where I wanted all this to go and more doodles planned xD

We'll see how long it takes to get to all of it xD

(pt. 1, pt. 2, pt. 3, pt. 4, pt.5, pt. 6)

outline under the read more:

Act I

Overture: Lady Ambrosia kidnaps the players and the narrator so they will tell her story.

Matchmaking (A woman with a kingdom must be in want of a consort)

Just Leave Everything to Me but evil and fairy like

More Important Things

Tadius and Ella agree that there’s too much work to be done to be focused on this. Both are reassured in each other’s commitments, and there is lingering romance. 

Mischief and Romance - Lady Ambrosia Approaches Ella

She tries to go for the kill here first and asks what love looks like to her. Ella does reveal she is in love, but she also confirms her suspicion—Lady Ambrosia is a fairy.

A Quest

Ella sends Sir Crumb to inform the Fairy Queen

The List

Ella was a dead end. Tadius is now the next victim. Lady Ambrosia has finished her list of bachelors and approaches Tadius with them.

Mischief and Romance - Lady Ambrosia has acquired a new target

Lord Cornelius Appleton

Destiny

Tadius laments the clearly destined love between Cornelius and Ella. Ella celebrates the good things in her life now, and how she will protect them, and how she loves Tadius. Lady Ambrosia plans on making things a whole lot worse before they get better—destiny is her plaything after all.

The Bachelor Parade

All the bachelors are introduced and present themselves to Ella, Lord Hop-a-Lot, and Tadius. Tadius does not do his usual good job of keeping in how he feels. Ella reprimands him.

Tadius’s Soliloquy

(Based on How I Am meets Who Am I)

He’s pissed! They were doing good and now distractions are happening! Royals end up only caring about parties and silly things (and maybe he’s in love and can’t admit it!) Ella would never do this!

Take What You Want

Lady Ambrosia steps in right after the soliloquy to encourage Tadius not quite yet fairy reveal. She explains that she has seen that the Queen favors him. It wouldn’t be hard to do all the things they want to do if they were both on the throne.

Tadius isn’t fully convinced yet, but he’s thinking.

Cornelius and Ella

A duet where they reminisce about childhood. Tadius sees them get close and leaves before Ella explains to Cornelius that her heart belongs to another. In being her friend, he encourages her to go for it. Ella says it’s Tadius, and Cornelius, a good dude, reminds her she has changed so much already, who cares about Tadius’s upbringing. This can only make the world better. (A positive spin on Take What You Want)

The Ball

The Way I’m Meant to

Ella and Tadius fight and then confirm their love.

Take What You Want Reprise

Ella leaves and while in love and feeling better Tadius still has fears and doubts. This isn’t how things are done. Lady Ambrosia preys on them. When Tadius affirms that he believes in Ella and loves her and will do the right thing, Lady Ambrosia is grossed out and has to go to plan C: possession. What’s important is she is only revealing his darker impulses—none of this is not something within Tadius himself.

Act II

Sir Crumb returns and tells Ella what the Fairy Queen told him. She’ll need to go to the forest herself to be able to get the means to defeat Lady Ambrosia. She leaves with Sir Crumb and asks Lord Hop-a-Lot to keep an eye on things.

A New King in Town

Dark Tadius Emerges and declares all the Bachelors can go home. He will be marrying Ella and he will be King. Fairy Guards drag them to dungeons. He is VIBING HARD.

Sisters

Ella talks to the Fairy Queen. She cannot grant Ella another wish, but if Ella takes a wand from her branches she can at least have one moment of starlight to confront Lady Ambrosia. The Fairy Queen sings about the two sisters duality and how they are oft opposed but have to survive together.

Ridiculous

Lord Hop-A-Lot tries to get through to Tadius. He sings his genuine feelings on royalty, magic, fairy tales, and love—it’s ridiculous. Hard work is all that matters, and sense. Lord Hop-A-Lot tries to remind him of Ella—everyone knew they were in love. Tadius thinks he is doing this for Ella—magic has hurt her so. But now he is at war with himself. He is also ridiculous.

The Way I’m Meant to Reprise

Ella returns with the wand and Sir Crumb and confronts Dark Tadius. Love does conquer all especially within the powers of a fairy of romance.

Mischief and Romance and Green and Goodness

Lady Ambrosia Fights Back. She is defeated by the wand in a kick ass fairy battle.

Tadius and Ella (a reprise of sorts of Cornelius and Ella)

Tadius apologizes profusely to Ella. It was him, it was his darkest thoughts, and Ella forgives him. She still chooses him, no matter what. Their dark impulses are actually quite the same. But as a team, they can balance each other. 

They apologize to all the nobles and bachelors. There likely will be further fallout but they’ll deal with it together.

The Way I’m Meant To (Finale)

Tadius and Ella get married. Lady Ambrosia crashes and flirts with Lord Hop-a-Lot. 

Storytelling (A woman with a kingdom must be in want of a consort)

The narrator finally escapes Lady Ambrosia’s clutches and sings his own version of the beginning song to end.

[atlantis-just-drowned]

A/N: Can you tell I'm obsessed with this man? In case you couldn't, here is one more x reader post about him. I wrote it all in one time. It's not even going to be the last. I wish I could say "enjoy" but 95% of my audience and probably of this website in general doesn't know about this man and couldn't care less about him. Still, enjoy my mad ramblings, losers.

CW: There will be a SFW and a NSFW part. For the SFW part: post-canon, mention of PTSD symptoms, maybe also implied cyber-bullying if you squint really hard. For the NSFW part: mention of choking, mention of death, love marks, dumbification, mention of edging, mention of being put on a leash

Damien x reader general headcanons

Please reblog to show support! Likes make posts die :(

Masterlist

SFW

Goofiest goof to have ever goofed

Damien loves being silly with you

Whether it's cracking dumb jokes, getting extra-cheesy, or even randomly spinning you around while he hums a song

He just loves to see you smile, and he can't help but be in a good mood when you're around

Delivers the worst pick up lines, but in a way that's so smooth you'd be almost admirative

Makes a lot of funny voices/tones all the time. Vocal stims go hardddd

Also lots of funny faces too

The amount of details about you he has memorized is insane, you became one of his biggest interests the moment he got a crush on you and he commit every single thing he learns about you to memory

Because of that, he also CANNOT shut up about you. Everyone on earth knows you're his partner

Shows you off on his lives, if you're at his place while he's doing a FAQ, at some point he's going to fetch you and put you on his laps so you can say hi

The first video he does after going back from Nevermoor he's talking about how he found the most perfect partner ever I swear he's down BAD

It definitely causes problem because his community is insane and not all of them are good people, but he does everything he can to protect and manage this aspect for you

I mentioned it in a previous post but I'm certain he has a 4chan account. I'm convinced that canon implies it and will die on this hill

Also, once again based on canon, I'm pretty sure he's a terrible cook, he can't make a good, healthy meal to save his life, which makes the fact that Freddie is good at it even funnier

Like, you've seen Freddie cook before (paywalled canon). It was awesome. You loved the meal. And the moment you leave this cursed place and Damien tries to cook something for you, it's burnt and terrible. The shift is so jarring it leaves you absolutely confused

His apartment is canonically an absolute disastrous mess, but once you start tagging along and you two regularly go to each other's place, he starts trying to keep it cleaner

However, the murder conspiracy boards stay ON

I think after everything that happened back in Nevermoor, he has a hard time talking about true crime like he used to

It definitely has a huge impact on his work and how he talks about those subjects

But it's also his biggest special interest and a way for him to externalize everything, so he doesn't stop his channel either

He also gets anxious and has panic attacks a lot more easily. Definitely keeps having sleeping issues (insomnia and nightmares mostly)

Expect to be treated as sleep medication. He cannot spend a good night without spooning you. You don't entirely solve his sleeping problems but he feels a lot less lonely with you by his side and it helps, in a way

Yaps at you. All the time. He loves yapping. Cannot shut up for the life of him.

Very dedicated boyfriend. Does everything he can to help you around and make himself useful

So affectionate too, he tells you how much you mean to him all the time. Looks at you like you're his entire world

He won't ever admit it but you just make him melt inside. He spent so much time building his cool, chill persona only for you to make him act like a flustered, awkward nerd

Honestly his vibes are somewhere between the nerd emoji and a himbo/himbim lmao

Zero survival instinct

I headcanon him to be AuDHD

NSFW

Carries a bottle of lube with him literally everywhere. I'm sorry but him behind paywall carrying lube in the most unexpected moment will forever be proof to me

Literally down for anything anytime and anywhere if it's for you. Seeing you turned on is a huge turn on for him

He tends to dom more but can sub too from time to time

Remember how I said he can't ever shut up? Yeah. He WILL keep rambling while he fucks you. He makes less and less sense the longer you're at it

Gets desperate so so easily. You don't even have to do much to keep him going. The closest Damien gets to his own end the more his voice turns pleading

Do I even need to mention that he likes it rough? It's just (paywalled) canon at this point. He fucks into you like a madman, he can't help it. Always asking you to go harder on him when you're in charge

Also loud as fuck. He not only can't stop making noises the whole time, but said noises can be heard from outside the motherfucking apartment. Don't even get me started on how bad it gets when he cums

You tried to edge him once. You had to convince your neighbors that they didn't need to call the police because what they heard wasn't your boyfriend dying a brutal and painful death

Loves leaving marks, whether it's you marking him up or the other way around, he just loves it. Hickeys, bite marks, bruises, nail scratches, chocking marks, lipstick if you wear makeup, you name it.

Also loves to fuck you stupid. He likes it when you do it to him but there's just something incredibly arousing for him in the idea of railing his amazing, clever partner so hard they can't spell their own name

He wouldn't mind being put on a leash either. Idk why I just think he'd like it. Definitely would get embarrassed about it tho.

[omghallucinations]

Hello, I’m curious how enhypen jay would handle relationships based on his chart? Especially with his cancer moon ruling the 7th house & that taurus stellium.

dude jay's chart is so green flag. like don't get me wrong, he has problems like anyone else and some of them are harder than others (looking at you, chiron conjunct his capricorn ascendant, sun square moon, and saturn-ASC-MC yod)

but whoever marries him is set for life. cancer moon and leo juno in the 7th house--like his emotional center and the commitment asteroid? bro. he is looking for a wife. like honestly regardless of gender, whoever his partner is, wife.

fixed square ass

jay's partner is gonna have to get sneaky with it when trying to convince him about things. he thinks he is right, about everything, especially with his sun at 0 degrees just absolutely blasting off taurus vibes to the sky. he wants things the way he wants things. he has some flexibility with his gemini mars but overall--very bullheaded, pun intended.

he may also have some kind of traditional ideas about his Role in a partnership, since he has so much invested in being Strong and Responsible (not in a gross way i swear tho, he genuinely is just doing his best). he has some complexes about like... Slightly Too Attached To Societal Ideas About Being Good and Normal i think, esp with capricorn chiron conjunct ascendant (a wound about his role in society/feeling unable to perfectly Achieve in a societal way, possible parents' tough expectations stuff) and a few other things.

sun square moon is not a walk in the park tho so he gets stressed about his own emotional nature, which is something his partner would have to navigate carefully (balancing jay's clearly sensitive heart and how he does NOT want to be as sensy as he is)

💒 husband material💒

there are. so many marks of Romance and Partnership. this isn't even all of them i swear.

ruler of his 7th house is in his 7th house--moon at home in cancer, already a very needs-to-be-reflected-in-another placement--cancer moon needs emotional contact to feel safe and the 7th house is about partnerships and contact with others

chart ruler saturn in his 5th house--this is also creativity and Finding Himself but there's a romantic quality to the 5th house too, with his chart ruler being saturn he might be a little attached to some traditional ideas or feel inhibited from expressing the Romance of his Soul or both--probably both, esp with saturn being in a quincunx with MC and ASC

5th house saturn trine neptune in the 1st house--Romance and Dreams, idealism, sometimes idealizing authority figures or the idea of authority, sometimes idealizing traditional relationship or gender roles (saturn in the 5th), either way to me this looks like a very giving and almost self-sacrificing placement, like he places a lot of his identity on service to others. with this being an air trine it's also very intellectual, smart, likely he's a good writer and great communicator, somewhat unconventional sense of humor possibly

taurus venus in the 4th house--taurus is ruled by venus, so venus is at home also. beauty, pleasure, enjoyment, that's all venus. venus is not really a romantic commitment girlie in a traditional sense, but in the foundational 4th house jay finds a lot of stability in things being aesthetically pleasing and stable, including his relationships

venus sextile pisces ceres -- ceres is an asteroid who represents nurturing. i'm not a huge asteroid girlie but i do think the more major ones can affect things with tight aspects--really cannot overemphasize how compassionate jay is. he has a talent for nurturing and giving and keeping things harmonious (altho he may give more than he receives a lot)

cancer jupiter in the 6th house opposite ascendant -- cancer jupiter is already very idealistic about relationships and love and nurturing--he likely finds meaning in taking care of other people. that's what makes his life feel worthwhile in a sense. in the 6th house he is very practical about it. this boy is Acts of SERVICE, honey. the 6th house is usually very anxious, but jupiter as a way of chilling anything out so that is reduced a bit although he may still have like... philosophical anxiety in a way? like Is This Right Am I Doing Right, kind of thing.

with cancer jupiter on his descendant, jay attracts a lot of luck and optimism in relationships, and he finds faith and meaning in relationships too. sometimes jupiter on the asc-dsc means they need a lot of space but cancer jupiter reduces this a lot hahah. he gives great advice, there may be a "teaching" angle to his relationships or a "being taught" one, like it's important for him to learn from someone and teach them in return. he can be a bit paternalistic sometimes but not on purpose, and he'd react well if it was pointed out. it's important to him to be seen as giving, nurturing, generous and knowledgable.

possible uh-ohs

his aquarius uranus is square venus and exactly quincunx his moon--this would normally indicate someone who will end things out of anxiety, tbh. this is reduced a bit by other parts of his chart and to me it looks more like overthinking and anxiety in general.

aquarius uranus in the 2nd house square 4th house shows that he often feels a little like an outsider, and he feels very very pressured to be independent and self-reliant. it's insanely hard for him to push back against that instinct especially with his capricorn ascendant and taurus placements. it's hard for him to rely on other people--he wants his partner to rely on him, but it will be really hard for him to be vulnerable and rely on his partner.

uranus quincunx 7th house cancer moon-- overthinking. over THINKING, girl. quincunx is already an aspect that says overTHINKING and then uranus puts so much vibrating pressure on planets to change and develop and also... think a lot. uranus is yassified mercury, remember that. jay will overanalyze absolutely everything and decide that he sucks somehow. every interaction he's ever had? oh he is thinking about them at night instead of sleeping. that text he sent his crush??? oh he spent 2 hours drafting it and 8 hours regretting it bc why did he use that specific emoji omg he's so dumb omg he's the worst person in the world--you get what i mean

uranus is contra-parallel juno (with a 0.08 degree orb) which is similar to an opposition--there's a conflict between his romantic loving partner-focused 7th house leo juno (the "marriage asteroid" as they say, but i don't take that literally, it's also fairness and commitment) and his 2nd house aquarius uranus which really wants him to be independent, Different, become His Own Person, that kind of thing

taurus mercury on his IC to me looks like someone who maybe had to grow up pretty fast--mercury is very youthful, but on the IC is like... maybe a too youthful or somewhat unreliable parent. maybe one of his parents felt more like a sibling? or jay had to care for a sibling? or he felt like his home life was purely intellectual and not emotional, like the way he was nurtured was just intellectually? idk there's something there though. anyway he's invested in learning and communication--education was very important to his family growing up i think and having things be intellectually stimulating at home is important to him--he would need a partner who could bring that to the table too (and who would be able navigate jay's like... Grown Up Too Fast Self-Reliant To a Fault stuff)

anyway!! let's end on a high note!

his leo juno in the seventh house shows that he wants fun, romance, pride in his relationship, he'd want to show someone off, he'd want to do flashy romantic gestures probably, rose petals that kind of shit, he has no shame (ok some shame, thank u aquarius/uranus aspects) in the cheesy game. he is naturally a bit cheesy ok?? with juno in the 7th as well, in a relationship he would be really invested in making sure that things are fair and just between him and his partner--he's very ethical as a person.

[honeyfarts666]

"And in the end, I foresee, one alone shall prove your utter ruin!"

I have a theory about what was going on in Sauron's mind here. I am basing this mostly on vibes but hear me out!

I think Sauron believes Celebrimbor. He knows that this has happened before. Those who are about to die frequently have foresight in this world. I think Sauron is afraid of this prophecy. But I don't think Sauron is thinking of the One as the ring that will be his ruin. He thinks it's Nenya.

Over the centuries and millennia, he becomes more fixated on the prophecy. He becomes convinced that Galadriel (and Nenya) will be his downfall because she continues to resist him throughout the ages. It is this obsession that blinds him to the efforts to destroy the One. He cannot even consider the idea that anyone would try to destroy the One because he is so convinced that Nenya will be his doom.

[sarchasmmm]

Assigning penacony characters D&D classes because I can

Aventurine - Wild Magic Sorcerer

Luck plays a huge part of this subclass, literally every time a wild magic sorc uses a spell they gamble on whether or not they have a wild magic surge, which can either help or hinder them. Also they get an ability called "bend luck" which lets them either improve the luck of allies or make the luck of enemies worse

Robin - Bard. Self explanatory. Not sure on a subclass but I'd guess I'd go with lore??

Sunday - Knowledge domain Cleric. This is based pretty much entirely on vibes but also you cannot convince me he would be anything other than a cleric

Acheron - Paladin. Given her connection to what is basically a god (are aeons the same as gods? I'm not a big Lore Guy I just know the vibes) and the fact that she does Big Damage With A Sword I think Paladin fits best. Also unsure on subclass but I'd tentatively go oath of vengeance?

Black Swan - Abberant mind sorcerer. As far as I know this is the class with the most psychic/mind fuckery stuff so. I think it works.

Sparkle - arcane trickster rogue. Once again I am mostly basing this on vibes but it literally has trickster in the name how could I not give it to her.

Dr Ratio - Wizard. Only person in penacony with the intelligence for it. Has the required pretentiousness

Firefly/Sam - artificer??? Mostly basing this off of the use of a big metal suit, that's similar to armourer artificers I think

Gallagher - Warlock of some description, although I'm not sure what subclass. The fiend maybe?

Ok that is all, hope I didn't miss anybody

[fraudulent-cheese]

Jumble of Total Drama contestants with the Papa's Freezeria Deluxe orders im assigning them, Part 1

Alejandro: Choose the pineapple chunks for very obvious reasons; i landed on strawberry for the syrup because i just looked up what flavors go well with Pineapple and it showed up. Generally a sweet, sweet sundae because he definitely has a sweet tooth he won't admit to

Axel: Variant on the Nutty Butter Blondie. The original Special Recipe is almost perfect but it was missing the bitterness Axel would particularly enjoy. She'd totally like peanut butter tho

B: Most of his sundae was chosen for the vibes™, that and i can't see him ordering big sugary stuff on the regular, but if he does he'll indulge with the caramel and honey. The birch beer toping is added specifically because he likes the flavor.

Bridgette: hers was inspired by the Ube Blue Bay as well as the Tropical Treat, the former being one of the Special Recipes with the Maui Meringue included. I gave her, Geoff and Brody similar ice creams for uh. being the polysurfer trio in my head lol

Brody: SPEAKING OF WHICH. Based off of Calypso Island Coconuts except not really. Just wanted to incorporate a bit more pink and i got a little carried away.

Courtney: Variant of the Caramel Macchiato. i simply changed it to include more brownies as a reference to Island. That, and to make this sundae even sweeter.

Dawn: Im so glad the easter holiday gives you access to this many pastel colored ingredients, because it was very easy to make Dawn's sundae that way!

Dawn would be a tiramisu and jelly beans enjoyer and you cannot convince me otherwise. because im correct

Duncan: Vaguely inspired by the sundae i have him when i drew him that one time. Lots of Mint toppings because it's green and also chocolate.

Oh, and the Birch Beer topping is just added because Duncan's a tryhard and thinks it's alcoholic or whatever. He'd do underage drinking to be cool but the only alcohol he could stomach is cider

Emma: Straight up just the Caramel Macchiato. What else would she order, really.

Geoff: Just the Tropical Treat Special Recipe. Look at it. It's him but a sundae

Heather: This sundae made me realise there's no direct lemon flavored syrup or chunks in the game, so kiwi chunks + chai syrup was the closest approximation to her order.

I also generally think her favorite holiday would be the volcano gala, mostly because the holiday outfits are so elegant and beautiful. It would appeal to her better than the others at least

Lindsay: Decided to freestyle this one!

The pink lemonade syrup was a MUST for her, she'd love it so much. In general i think she'd enjoy strawberry/cherry flavored ice creams and drizzles and such. She'd order a coffee with three pumps strawberry. to me.

I choose the Donut chunks instead of straight strawberry because it's sweeter :p

Noah: Did not realize both the characters i had chosen for both my Driver and Chef were going to be back to back due to the Alphabetical order O_O

Uh anyways! For Noah i tried coming up with the sundae that would hypothetically have the most inoffensive taste/texture, because i cannot see him liking anything more elaborate :p

Trent: Variant of the Big Top Blondie. It's an apple/banana/lemony sundae, and it's exactly the flavors he'd enjoy. Shame you can't control the numbers that come out of the new years shaker tho, so i had to resort to the 7s.

Tyler: Another freestyle! Generally landed on something that included biscuits and the cereal shaker topping since i do think Tyler would like those alot. Also she can share with Lindsay since it's large :D

Aaaand i had way too many for one post, so uh. yeah. See you in part 2

[trashcanlore]

A Crack Theory About Maze

Alternatively: Everyone in Natlan is dead and I can prove it with 3 easy tools I already have in my brain

*Record scratch* I bet you're wondering how we got here. Well, it all started when I was playing through Simulanka and saw the carpet on the floor of Constellation Metropole. The pattern reminded me of player piano scrolls, and since my brain needs to be studied in a lab, that then reminded me of Westworld. (Slight spoilers for season 1 follow)

Westworld is a sci-fi-ish TV show about a futuristic amusement park recreating the Wild West, featuring interactive storylines where guests can act out their hearts' darkest desires. The only ‘people’ hurt are the hosts, who are basically the android NPCs of the park. Hosts are part of greater park narratives, and individually operate within their story loops, unless disturbed by the outside forces of guests. At the end of each day, the hosts are reset/memory wiped/repaired (unless the narrative says differently) and return to experience the horrors anew. The player piano is used as a visual and narrative motif throughout Westworld to represent the cyclical and automated lives of the hosts; similarly, the clockwork in Constellation Metropole represents the strictly laid out paths of the toys while under the ‘protection’ of the Goddess of Prophecy. 

Convinced this carpet pattern was an intentional reference, and knowing that summer events foreshadow the new region, I flung myself headfirst into themes and narratives delulu (a season 1 rewatch) and during that rewatch I realized that a different Westworld plot point and visual motif might be what's actually foreshadowing for my mostly vibes-based theory: Everyone in Natlan is dead.

THE MAZE

The imagery of a humanoid figure in a maze is used throughout Westworld, explained within the narrative of the park as a Native American myth. According to the in-park mythology, the maze represents “the sum of a man’s life,” and the man in the center has been killed and resurrected many times, eventually building the maze around himself as protection. (Resurrection is a very common theme in Indigenous American mythology.) There is a human character who is trying to solve the maze, and for a time he believes the center of the maze is true death, something that does not exist in the park because the guests cannot be killed (by the hosts) and the hosts can always be repaired.

This myth is based on the real life creation myth of the Tohono O'odham people, where the Man in the Maze, I’itoi, created the world in an intense struggle and then retired to a labyrinthian cave on top of a mountain. In art, I’itoi is depicted above a maze, which represents the experiences and choices of a person throughout their lives. The middle of the maze represents their goals and dreams, and once they reach the center, they can look back and then pass into the next world.

According to some tellings of the myth, I’itoi was killed by the humans he created and taught. He then resurrected himself, invented the concept of war, and then brought the Tohono O’odham people to the surface of the earth to be his soldiers. 

Fun fact: This creation story is actually referenced in ZZZ, with the Papago hollow (Papago is an alternate name for the Tohono O’odham people).

In Westworld, the maze is actually a thought exercise and model developed by the programmer behind the park hosts. His theory of consciousness was that it was achieved through a journey inward, and when a host reached the center of the maze, they would achieve true consciousness and be ‘free.’ 

Maze iconography in the Americas is not unique to the Tohono O'odham people - another notable example is the Hopi Tapuat. This labyrinth (technically only has one path) represents the human life cycle and eventual (spiritual) rebirth.

While researching maze symbolism, I read a few articles that mentioned Mesoamerican mazes being used to trap the spirits of the dead, but unfortunately, I couldn't find any specific source for that information. However, it is possible to connect maze imagery to the Aztec and Mayan beliefs about the Underworld. Multiple archaeological excavations have uncovered huge networks of caves, tunnels, and rooms underground that may have been built to represent the journey to the underworld and/or provide a location for rituals associated with death. (You can read more about this here: 1 2 3)

As for the underworld itself, both the Aztec Mictlan and the Maya Xibalba are described as containing all kinds of traps and challenges for the dead passing through - and can’t forget the ballcourt (in Xibalba at least). Ball is life. While this isn’t exactly a maze, I will argue that for the sake of this crack theory, it’s close enough thematically. 

Smoke and Mirrors

You may have recognized the name Mictlan, because in Genshin, that’s one of the names for the Masters of the Night-Wind tribe, which can be alternatively translated as “Masters of the Mysterious Smoke.” This will be relevant later, I promise. 

The Natlan craftable sword, the Flute of Ezpitzal, is described as being a ritual instrument of this tribe, and the description tells the story of how humans and dragons came to a (local?) agreement to ensure their survival. The dragons had fled into dreams because of the fire of “ancient beacons,” and when the humans asked for their protection, they offered the following: 

"A labyrinth of mirrors and a fortress of mist, these shall we build to shield your tiny mortal tribes from the scourge of war." 

The theme continues with the name of the sword’s passive: “smoke-and-mirror mystery,” and the upcoming Archon Quest “Beyond the Smoke and Mirrors.” The phrase “smoke and mirrors” is an idiom for distracting from something unpleasant, but in the context of Natlan lore, it’s almost certainly referring to the smoking obsidian mirror iconography. 

Mirrors of all kinds were used throughout ancient Mesoamerica for divination and scrying-like rituals, including communication with otherworld entities. The most well known mirror material used was obsidian, which was also used for blades and tools - the black color of obsidian is probably what led to its association with smoke (also you can use mirrors to start fires). Obsidian mirrors were associated with additional imagery such as fire, the sun, eyes, butterflies, and caves as the entrance to the underworld. Mirrors were also compared to the surface of still water (a straightforward comparison) - one interesting example is Aztec writing that referred to Aztlan (mythical origin of Aztec people) as ‘the great water mirror that surrounds the great city.’ There was even a period of time where the mirror was used as a metaphor to represent the world itself. 

This is similar to what Mona says about Simulanka: fate in Simulanka is directly based on Teyvat’s, and that “the creator made this world inside a mirror, or a lake, and this world is the reflection.” 

Here’s where things start to get interesting: there is a Nahuatl glyph for the smoking obsidian mirror, specifically associated with a god who we’ll discuss later. The scroll-like shape used for the smoke is very similar to the symbol used for speech, singing, or breath.

This shape is also very similar to the older Mayan glyph for smoke - which happens to be basically identical to the symbol used for blood. You can see an example here in this famous carving from Yaxchilan:

The link between smoke and blood is actually explicitly referenced in the name of the Flute of Ezpitzal. Ezpitzal is a Nahuatl word meaning ‘gust of blood’ - eztli is blood and pitza is ‘to blow,’ as in playing a flute. Pitza is also sometimes translated “becoming inflamed with anger.” The ezpitzal symbol is made up of six streams of blood, ending in a precious stone, with a heart in the center:

The ezpitzal can be found flowing from the head of older depictions of Tezcatlipoca “smoking mirror,” the Lord of the Night. 

The Lord of the Night

Tezcatlipoca is one of the central Aztec gods, associated with the night sky, hurricanes, and conflict, and the calendar. He was typically depicted with a missing foot due to a monster attack and a smoking obsidian mirror somewhere on his body. The missing right foot is usually replaced with a smoking obsidian mirror, a snake, or a bone. Tezcatlipoca has similarities to the earlier Maya deities Tohil (god of fire and associated with sacrifice) and K’awiil (thunder god), who is depicted with a smoking obsidian knife in his forehead and one leg replaced with a snake. 

The smoking mirror glyph associated with Tezcatlipoca looks a little bit like the obsidian carvings in the Night Kingdom:

Besides for the title of Lord of the Night, Tezcatlipoca is Genshin lore relevant as the rival of Quetzalcoatl. In one version of the Five Suns Aztec creation myth, Tezcatlipoca and Quetzalcoatl are creation gods and take turns being suns and destroying each other’s work. Quetzalcoatl hasn’t been mentioned by name in Natlan yet, but his Maya equivalent, Kukulkan (“Plumed Serpent”), also known as Waxaklahun Ubah Kan (“War Serpent”) sure has. In Genshin, Waxaklahun Ubah Kan, or the Sage of the Stolen Flame, stole a seed of phlogiston from the dragons and taught the humans how to use it. He is shown alongside Xbalanque, the first Pyro Archon, on a mural, where they both appear to hold phlogiston. There’s something important missing here: How did the Genshin equivalent of Tezcatlipoca contribute to the ‘creation’ of humans?

In the 5.1 trailer, the Lord of the Night and the “protection of the rules” are mentioned. The only information we have about the Lord of the Night is that in the misleading Records of Hanan Pacha, he leads humans astray and is the enemy of Waxaklahun Ubah Kan, and that a cat in the Night Kingdom warns us against trusting the Sage.

The set of rules we know the most about are the ones created by Xbalanque, using borrowed power from the heavens (Ronova). These are the rules that allow humans to become Archons and inherit the memories of the land. 

The other, more mysterious set of rules, are those that allow Ancient Name bearers to resurrect through the Sacred Flame with the help of the Archon. The Sacred Flame is a conduit to the Night Kingdom and the Wayobs, and is fueled by Contending Fire produced by battles between Natlan people. Given that Tezcatlipoca is a god of conflict, I think these rules mentioned in the trailer are referring to the Sacred Flame system of resurrection. 

Therefore, at some point during Natlan’s history, the beef between the Sage and the Lord of the Night became so severe that the Lord of the Night’s contribution to the system of Natlan was intentionally covered up- which may be what Capitano is hinting at in the 5.1 trailer when he says Mavuika is withholding information from us. 

This was a bit of a tangent, but I promise it’s relevant to the thesis. At the conclusion of the Five Suns myth, Quetzalcoatl descends into Mictlan to find the bones of the humans he created under earlier suns, and who were destroyed by various god antics, including those of Tezcatlipoca. He then uses his own blood to bring the humans back to life. Maybe my insistence that everyone in Natlan is dead isn’t so vibe based after all. 

The Center 

It is time for me to confess something. In actuality, these 2k words were elaborate setup for a pun. 

Here it goes: At the conclusion of the K’iche’ Maya creation story, the Popul Vuh, the gods finally find the perfect material for creating humans who will worship them: maize. The hurricane god and the Quetzal serpent sculpt the first humans out of a maize paste, with water for blood. Conveniently, these two can be directly compared to Quetzalcoatl and Tezcatlipoca - further supporting the possibility of the latter’s important role in Natlan’s history. 

Earlier, I mentioned how water and mirrors were closely associated, and how the glyphs for blood and smoke look similar. The Flute of Ezpitzal name and lore reference the protection of humans with a ‘labyrinth of mirrors,’ smoking mirrors (weapon passive), and blood through the word ezpitzal. The ezpitzal is also closely linked to Tezcatlipoca, one of the Aztec creator deities. Using this symbolism, the smoke and mirrors represent the water, or blood, used to (re)create humans. Which then means of course that the second ingredient needed for humans is maze - I’m sorry, maize. 

And if the humans are made out of maze…well then they must be dead. 

Sabre’s Fun Fact Science Corner (with bonus Latam literature section just for Schwan):

The Genshin writers love the story of the Hero Twins defeating Seven Macaw and replacing his teeth with maize - they’ve referenced it at least three times so far. The weirdest is the flipped version where the human priest Maghan sacrifices himself and combines his blood with animal teeth and dirt to create grainfruit (maize). Autosacrifice of blood in particular was a very important Maya ritual. I appreciate their commitment to keeping the maize cannibalism implications going.  

The Narzissenkreuz Ordo associated lore has had multiple references to circular ruins and mirrors (which may simply just be the Alice in Wonderland reference) - however, we do know that one Ordo member went to Natlan looking for Something. “The Circular Ruins” is a short story by Jorge Luis Borges where a man tries to create another man through dreaming, with the help of a deity known as “Fire.” The story itself references Through the Looking-Glass as well. 

This one is full credit to Schwan but there’s a Mexican novel Pedro Páramo, which was very influential on other Latin American writers like Gabriel García Márquez. The plot is basically that this guy travels to the town where his father is from to meet him and then it turns out that everyone in the town is dead. It’s very core. 

It turns out Westworld season 1 is extremely HYV core - I just know some guy there saw the last episode and had their brain rewired, much like Dawei seeing Misato Evangelion for the first time

References: https://www.library.pima.gov/content/man-in-the-maze/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I%27itoi https://westworld.fandom.com/wiki/The_Maze

[aretheypolyam]

Submitted Reasoning: I cannot be convinced that he didn't want to date/potentially marry Vlad alongside Maddie. Why make him choose?

If you do not know the character feel free to vote based on vibes! 💙♥️🖤

[fab-ernathy]

The Greek Class' Big 3s

(DISCLAIMER: This is purely based on stereotypes and I don't necessarily believe in astrology. This is just for fun.)

Henry

☀️ Capricorn

🌙 Aquarius

⬆️ Virgo

Major earth sign vibes. Comes across as very put together and logical, but has a deep rooted independent streak that makes him a natural trendsetter. Tendency to be detached, but also willing to take risks.

Bunny

☀️ Gemini

🌙 Aries

⬆️ Leo

You cannot convince me I haven't nailed this. Likes being the centre of attention, very charming, but a tendency to manipulate or act impulsively. 'Humble' is not in his vocabulary.

Francis

☀️ Taurus

🌙 Virgo

⬆️ Libra

Upon first meeting, very charming, almost flirty, and has a keen sense of style, but very anxious and highly strung under the surface. More likely to take financial security and comfort seriously even at great personal cost (*cough* epilogue *cough*).

Charles and Camilla

☀️ Cancer

🌙 Aries

⬆️ Pisces

What's interesting about the twins is that they have completely different presentations of the same traits. They're both family oriented, but Charles is possessive where Camilla is placed in a more nurturing role by Richard/the narrative. This is pure headcanon but I like to think of Camilla as having this barely concealed impulsivity, and obviously Charles has more of the rage aspect of Aries. Richard describes them as ethereal and angelic when first seeing them.

Richard

☀️ Libra

🌙 Gemini

⬆️ Scorpio

Able to see multiple perspectives of things to a fault (easily influenced). Comes across as mysterious, which the others bring up in chapter 2 (?).

[slvtforfiction]

Lunch club boys ranked!

☆ Smut!!

☆ Hey guys! Before anything else I would ask you to request anything you want because I've lost a lot of motivation and it would really help! :D (Please look at pinned post to see if requests are open.)

☆ Divider Cred - @cafekitsune

Masterlist | Pinned Post

Most to least vanilla in bed

☆ Traves

You cannot convince me that this man is anything other than vanilla,he’s a giant teddy bear. He wouldn’t be involved in any type of masochist/sadist relationship and I doubt his kinks go beyond light choking at most.

☆ Cooper

He’s got few kinks but I still think he has more outlandish kinks than Traves including but not limited to ; choking,bondage,eyp/face sitting. I don’t think he’s got any extreme kinks but he gives me “teddy-bear-but-secretly-freaky-vibes.”

☆ Jschlatt

He’s barely kinky,he’s definitely dominant but I think it’s misread as freaky,his kinks include ; choking,spitting,handcuffs/bondage,dirty talk. I don’t think his kinks would go farther than that although he could be a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

☆ Ted

Ted doesn’t give me massive kinky vibes,just particularly dominant vibes. His kinks would most likely include ; dirty talk,biting/hickeys,choking,light LIGHT pain kink. He strikes me as a service dom,whispering dirty things in your ear while he pounds your cervix <3

☆ Slimecicle/Charlie

Definitely a switch before we even begin talking about anything else. He’s freaky and his kinks would include ; Choking,pain,degrading,hickeys/biting. He’s freaky but definitely not the freakiest out of the bunch. (Would defo laugh during sex)

☆ Noah/Hugbox

HES FREAKY. There’s no doubt in my mind that this man would tie you up and overstimulate you till you’re not sure what you’re begging for. His kinks include ; Choking,overstim,pain,bdsm,bondage, hickeys/biting,dacraphilia etc.



☆ How they would react if you told them their ranking (based off this - timestap; 7:24)

☆ Traves

Travis doesn’t fight it,he knows out of everyone else that he’s the most likely to be vanilla and he doesn’t really care. The man likes simple sex and he’s okay with that.

☆ Cooper

Cooper would definitely fight it,he likes to think he’s kinky although he can’t seem to wrap his head around the fact that he’s the second least kinky in your head no matter what he thinks.

☆ Jschlatt

Honestly dude would give it the “Eh,guess we’ll never know” He’s secretive about his sex life and fair play to him for that,you’ll never really know if your assumptions were true until you find yourself underneath him.

☆ Ted

I think he’d have a similar reaction to Schlatt,not saying anything besides “Eh,a little wrong.” You’d find out what a little wrong means when he’s on top of you trying to prove him dominance:3

☆ Slimecicle/Charlie

I think he’d let it slide,not really thinking too much of it,he’d giggle at the word freaky and not say much to confirm or deny anything. Most likely making jokes about his ranking “Well you should see me with the ladies”

☆ Noah/Hugbox

He would 100% confirm the suspicions infront of everyone and very proudly may I add,he wouldn’t give examples but he’d definitely agree with being the freakiest out of the group and he would own that shit.

[heliomanteia]

"You think to share your power, to avoid the temptation to misuse it. A noble sentiment… but, ultimately, a mistake… no group has ever done so."

Solas is the goddamn king of dropping statements that are said so confidently you almost believe they're correct but they're so detached from reality that some thinking gets you going wait a little. Because actually having someone constantly vibe check you and the intent behind your actions is how your motivations and temptations are controlled. That's why base DA:I had Blackwall call you out if you were proclaiming being the Herald while admitting to him you don't believe in any of that. He has reasons to doubt your motivations and sincerity. Solas being convinced (since DA:I nonetheless) that you cannot share power with anyone is interesting. Again, it's not mistreatment of character to have him go down the antagonist path when he had it in him from the get-go.

The funniest thing is that he is bewildered by Sera and Jennies not having a Large Goal (Mr. "he thinks about where it ends") for their little organization but Jennies are still there in Trespasser epilogue (you can even join them) and if loot is anything to go by, you can find a belt of Red Jenny in a chest in Antiva in Veilguard with a cheeky note attached, presumably from Sera. So, I assume they are still there by DATV timeline. Chargers shared power despite Bull having an upper hand because he respected his team. It doesn't have to be a large organization, neither Chargers or Jennies are — but they are functional. By the end of the Trespasser, we also have Dorian and Maevaris establish the Lucerni, future Shadow Dragons, who also rely on communal values and only fall apart after Maevaris loses her seat; and even then they reemerge. Trusting your team works, Solas.

Solas not understanding small wins and practical help over grand world-changing events or trusting your team and having it trust you is kinda telling.

[blackdiamond1038]

Secret Life Secrets

Session 3

Green- Successful

Red- Failed

Scott: Tell a player you love them and have them say it back unprompted at least 3 times. 1 attempt per player.

Jimmy: Re-bind your W key to A, S to W, D to S, and A to D for 30 minutes. You must interact with other players during the 30 minutes. If anyone points out your weird movements, restart the timer.

Lizzie: You cannot deny any request or question from another player. You must say yes.

Martyn: Someone else on the server has the same task as you. Find out who it is while still keeping it a secret. Do not reroll.

Skizz: Someone else on the server has the same task as you. Find out who it is while still keeping it a secret. Do not reroll.

Tango: You have an imaginary friend. Talk to them as if they follow you around the whole session and are part of conversations. You must interact with other players.

Grian: For every heart of damage Joel takes, you must take the same. You can let Joel in on the secret, but no one else. If either of you die this session, you fail.

Joel: Listen into another player’s conversation then try to have the same conversation with them later and have them claim deja vu. [Re-roll for harder task] Do a 100 block water bucket clutch in front of the whole server.

BigB: Listen into another player’s conversation then try to have the same conversation with them later and have them claim deja vu.

Bdubs: Use the words “bet,” “poggers,” “dab,” “yeet,” “drip,” “slay,” “vibing,” “valid,” “rizz,” and “sheesh” in the correct context over various conversations. If someone questions or repeats the words back to you, that whole conversation does not count. [I know his fail/success was kinda messy, but he pressed successful, so I’m counting it as a success.]

Pearl: Request an item 5 times in one conversation but never pick it up. You can’t be called out. 

Mumbo: Prevent Scar from losing more than 3 hearts this session.

Scar: Remove all light sources from around 5 people’s bases. If someone questions you, you need to put that person’s lights back.

Impulse: Find any player over 25 hearts and “accidentally” take 5 off of them. The method is your choice. You fail if they ask if it’s your task.

Gem: You declared yourself incorrectly successful last session. You must re-roll for harder task. [Re-roll for harder task] Open the end portal. 

Cleo: Film a nature documentary for on the server about 2 people who aren’t you for at least 5 minutes. If anyone notices you or interrupts the film, you must stop and find someone else.

Etho: Convince someone you have the same task as them. [Re-roll for harder task] Figure out someone’s secret task and prevent them from completing it.

y’all this took me two hours 😭

Let me know if anything is wrong, it’s a LOT to keep track of

[thekoalapastriesbakery]

I'm just here as a place to put all of your Autistic!Drivers headcannons. I wanna hear them all

🦕 (Sry for the spam lmao)

you absolutely do not need to apologise for spamming at all i love this

okay generally speaking i could probably be convinced that most of the drivers are autistic bc like. these guys have one interest and they know everything about it. like if you sent me just about any driver on my list and asked me to do a fic about them being autistic i would probably not even struggle. (also like. so many athletes scream adhd to me like i know you i've been you just less functional)

for me, though, the drivers who jump out as autistic to me are oscar, seb, kimi r, max, lando, and valtteri. so. uh. here are the reasons :D

(disclaimer of course that this is just for fun and i am not saying the drivers necessarily are autistic so if you're offended by this just scroll ok?)

kimi raikkonen:

the thing about kimi is that he can do facial expressions but he just doesn't a lot of the time

generally speaking he is just 😐 and he's not being mean! he's just not doing expressions for no reason

and he doesn't generally do much in the way of tone variation

he does sometimes of course but most of the time i've heard him speak (especially in clips that people are saying like "this is why he's called the ice man") it's just like no that's autism

i do that shit all the time

also when he is smiling it's generally only around people he really cares about (see: any time he interacts with seb)

to me he is just the pinnacle of unmasked autism

you cannot convince me he hasn't ended up eating chicken nuggets or (insert autism safe food here) and been made fun of for it

lando norris:

have you seen what this boy eats

sensory issues at their finest

the way he stands with his shoulder blades??

the exact same way i would stand to avoid the tag on the back of a shirt

also his facial expressions and tones are very ... unique

also i don't think i can explain this but he's very autistic twelve year old who's just discovered dino nuggets and bluey

i don't make the rules

max verstappen:

the flags

the geography

maxsplaining

need i go on

oscar piastri:

okay look there are sooooo many things i could say about him

i've made two posts dedicated to autistic!oscar before already

(one and two)

and yet

more!

i mean for starters the same expression/tone issues that i think kimi r has but less masked

also the fact that he does smile and he can be really expressive when he's around people he's comfortable with!!

hoodies + shorts? autistic temperature regulation/insensitivity

there's also him on the red carpet at f175 where he just looked very sensory overload

oh and his insistence on winning grill the grid

sebastian vettel:

go watch the grill the grid video of him listing f1 world champions and tell me i'm wrong

you can't

the way he can't sit with both feet flat on the floor

the way he fidgets with his ears (very stimmy to me)

he also just seems to be very observant and trying to base his behaviour off of how other people are acting which lowkey looks like masking to me

i don't think this will make sense to a lot of people but he's like 5 year old boy autism meets teenage girl autism

valtteri bottas:

he's got that pre-teen/middle school girl autism

also that "i just got diagnosed and i'm trying to stop masking because it's making me exhausted" flair

the clothes the colours the hair the humour the everything

everytime he talks i actually understand what he means (never happens with neurotypicals. ever)

so um. yeah ✨

also a lot of this is just vibes like you 🫵 you're like me

[yunhoszn]

alright babes you already know it's bro but sleep deprived

anyway we were talkin abt this in the dms but i think its time to share w the class

who in atz are briefs guys and who are boxers guys?

also i love you •3•

ateez & boxers v. briefs

erm mentions of underwear?,,,, extremely suggestive….. half of this makes no sense im high as shit typing this and my logic probably does not logic like i thought it did…

OKAY ok here we go

⟢ hongjoong likely wears boxers.. i feel like if he did one of those calvin klein ads, he’d wear the briefs for the bit but that’s about it. he seems like the type who likes the free-ness of them if that makes sense 😭

⟢ seonghwa. ok. i feel like he varies. i could def see him in boxers like… hovering over you, knees caging you in, his hair long enough that it wraps and curls around the base of his neck— i’m gonna stop talking about this— but i could also see him in that same calvin klein ad setting and i feel like he would look really good in some grey briefs…

⟢ yunho is fs a boxers guy. tbh i feel like most tall men are just cause they’re comfortable and most tall men are carrying very well endowed,,,, packages,,,, so yeah i think he would wear boxers, but not too loose. like they’re actually on the snugger side

⟢ yeosang is a briefs guy. u cannot convince me otherwise. (i’m imagining the jeremy allen white calvin klein ad) that’s how i imagine yeosang in briefs. like it just makes so much sense to me.

⟢ san…. i told u my thoughts on san. but i’m sharing with the class now <3 i think if this were inception era san, the answer would be boxers no questions asked. but current san, extremely built, shaped like a dorito san, the answer is obviously briefs. they hug his thighs and his ass just right… muscular men in briefs is a weakness…. a plague…

⟢ mingi is another obvious briefs choice. slightly dorito shaped, mingi is the exception to my ‘tall men wear boxers’ disclaimer from before. U cannot look at him and tell me he does Not wear briefs. then ur lying straight to my face. tell me u do not see this man being the ateez man who would Actually do the calvin klein ad.

⟢ wooyoung, i had to toss around with. but ultimately i think he’s a boxers guy. my conclusion is more of a technical analysis bc i was thinking about his style and the kind of clothes he wears, which are usually on the baggier side, so i’d think he prefers comfortability. and tbh boxers fit that whole vibe.

⟢ jongho is also a boxers guy no doubt. his wasn’t even a meticulous analysis or anything. i thought about it for one second and immediately came to the idea; ‘jongho wears boxers’. solely based on vibes. like look at him. once u see the vision, u just do and there’s no turning back. boxers guy.

(also hi i love YOU MORE!!!!! :3 hehe i got the last word so i win in terms of size of love)

© yunhoszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.